#god ok. god. still so fucking annoying. like god i cried not because you did shit to me but you hurt B so fucking much. like god

[hazmatazz]

like go fucking cunt your boyfriends shouldn't feel like they're walking on eggshells everytime you're around. no wonder neither of us wanted to kiss you because we were so disinterested because you made us feel fucking awful!!! oh my god

#honestly i'm just mad at how fucking? idk immature she was? like yeah we were 14 but oh my god you didn't have to put lasting scars on B- #-and then act like you were in the right like at least ypu could've apologized to him after a few fucking years. or maybe even when he asked #and god don't fucking act like you're the most mature person in the room when you can't handle your boyfriend asking you- #to respect his boundaries that she has set up FOR MONTHS. don't turn the conversation onto how he fucked up once you can have a separate- #fucking conversation on that. but NOOO conveniently you bring it up months after it happened when somebody's bringing up shit to you!! #and you change the conversation before you have to admit fault!!???? GOD. how much of a bitch are you??? #god at least i /tried/ to be better at communicating. did better after we broke up because you keep squashing all my fucking efforts dirtbag #god ok. god. still so fucking annoying. like god i cried not because you did shit to me but you hurt B so fucking much. like god #it's hard to make me cry like that esp back then. goddd. so glad i haven't been forced to talk to you in years #AND B WAS FUCKING GUILTY FOR “breaking our friend group apart” BECAUSE HE COULDN'T HANDLE SEEING YOU #like god. you fucked that guy up for years. so fucking glad she's doing better but oh my god. jackass #sorry anyways #babble #vent

[okcoolthanks]

How to stop feeling like an awful person after accidentally crossing someone’s boundary even though you talked to them about it and apologized and know you won’t do it again and they understood it was an accident and it’s fine and you two are still on good terms

#god I just #Ughhghhg #I can’t stop THINKING about it it wasn’t even that bad they said i was doing a bit and it was getting annoying #and I said i was sorry like multiple times and I said I won’t do that but again and they were like ‘no you can! it just got a little annoyi #ng it’s fine!’ and I still feel like a terrible person #I think I’m tired that’s gotta be it #or I’m mentally going through what I went through with my old friends and how I got mad at them and lashed out when I shouldn’t have and #refused to apologize and got into a big argument and then had one conversation about it and got mad again and then lashed out AGAIN and then #texted that I didn’t want to be friends any more and then I cried for weeks and every time I’d see one of them I’d want to throw up and I wa #s constantly miserable I didn’t want to go to school and I did everything that I could ok the comic because it was a fun distraction but it #also made me sad because I wanted to finish it and show it to them but they weren’t ever actually interested in it and I never got to show #them and I even made two characters in it based on two of my best friends in that group at the time and now I don’t know if I should delete #them entirely or keep it or change the characters???????? I don’t know #fuck #oh yeah one of those best friends basically took the plot of HBD and changed it a little and is gonna make a fucking short film with it #it’s a stupid fucking plot too it’s one of those like coming of age stories where the main character wears a ghost sheet and it’s actually a #metaphore for being socially anxious because he has a bad home life but then! then he’s walking to class and someone steps on the sheet and #it comes off! and they become best friends and they work through their problems! #Jesus fucking Christ I can’t believe her #I told her it was similar and that she should change it but we were gonna discuss that the week I texted I wasn’t coming back so #If she makes it I’m gonna sue her I don’t fucking care I told her I fucking told her and later that fucking day she ‘came up with it on her #own’ fucking Christ man get a life #I need to stop typing and go to sleep idk why I did that #sorry for the rant!

[canirove]

Broken Hearts Football Club | Chapter 25

Previous chapter | Next chapter

Masterlist

"You have to cut the tomatoes smaller."

"Smaller than this?" 

"Yes. That's what the recipe says."

"Ok, fine. Smaller it is" Ben sighed.

"Oh… my God"

"What am I doing wrong now?" he asked.

"Sarina is calling me" June said, her eyes fixed on her phone.

"Then pick up!"

"I can't."

"What? Why not?"

"She's going to tell me that I'm not going to the World Cup."

"You don't know that, June."

"Yes, I do! I'm not ready yet and… Chilwell, what are you doing?"

"Picking up for you" he smiled, giving her her phone.

"You, you… urgh" she groaned. "Hello?" June said. "I'm good, thank you. Just doing some cooking. Yes. Yes. Ok. Yeah, yeah… Thank you. Ok, bye."

"And? What did she say?" Ben asked. 

"She… she said… she" June mumbled, tears coming to her eyes.

"Dear Lord, Maxwell. Speak! You are making me nervous!"

"I'm going to Australia, Ben. I'm going to the World Cup" she cried.

"You are going? Like, for real?"

"For real" she chuckled, her little laugh getting mixed with her sobs.

"Oh my God, June!" he said as he hugged her, lifting her in the air and starting to spin with her.

"Ben, stop!" she laughed. "You are gonna make me dizzy!" 

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry" he replied, stopping but still hugging her. "But you are going to the World Cup!"

"I am."

"I knew all that hard work would pay off. I am so proud of you, June. So proud. I love you" Ben said before kissing her.

There. He had said it. He had said the three words. 

And he was putting all those feelings he had for her in that kiss, letting her know that he had meant it, trying to somehow stop her from freaking out. And it was working, because the moment those three words had left Ben's lips, June had wanted to run away like she always did. But she couldn't. The way he was kissing her was making her forget about everything and anything, even her name.

"Come" he said, breaking their kiss and taking her hand.

"Where?" June asked, trying to catch her breath.

"Upstairs. Let's go celebrate the good news."

"You mean…"

"Yes, Maxwell. I want to do it. Don't you?" Ben asked with a teasing smile.

"I do" she nodded. "But are you sure? What about not wanting to become one of my fuck buddies?"

"I know I'm not going to be one of them."

"How?"

"Call it a hunch" he shrugged. "Now, are you coming upstairs with me or not?"

"What about our lunch?" 

"We'll eat later. We'll need to recharge" he smirked.

"Chilwell… Did you just quote me?" June laughed.

"Maybe" he shrugged again. "Are you coming or not?

"That'll depend on what you can do" she replied with a mischievous smile. 

"Ok, come here you little dirty mind" Ben said, picking her up and throwing her over his shoulder, June not being able to stop laughing.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

"Penny for your thoughts?" Ben said while playing with June's hair, her finger drawing small hearts on his chest. 

"It's nothing, something silly."

"Everything you say is silly, Maxwell. Ouch!" he complained after she pinched his nipple. 

"You deserve it for being an idiot" she smiled. 

"You know, when Mason said you were fire in bed, I didn't expect it to be violence."

"He said what?" she laughed, turning to look at Ben.

"His words, not mine."

"Men" she sighed. "Do you think we will get to be proper friends again?" June asked, resting her chin on his chest.

"You will. You just need to be patient. And you still haven't told me what you were thinking about" Ben said, putting a lock of hair behind her ear.

"It's nothing, I already told you" she shrugged.

"And I already told you I want to know."

"You are so annoying, Chilwell."

"You weren't thinking the same 10 minutes ago" he smirked.

"Shut up!" she replied, this time hitting him.

"Ouch!" he laughed.

"But now that you mention it… that is what I was thinking about. What we were doing 10 minutes ago. I can't remember the last time I felt something like that" she said in almost a whisper, her cheeks getting warm.

"Wait, Mason never made you… Ouch! June, stop hitting me!" Ben complained again.

"Then stop being an idiot!"

"Ok, ok. No more comments. But what do you mean with something like that?"

"I… I…" she said, back to playing with her finger on his chest. "I can't remember the last time I had sex with someone and it felt like something else. Like there was more to it, more than just something physical, you know?"

"You mean you can't remember the last time you made love with someone."

"As corny as that sounds… Yes" she whispered, feeling her cheeks now burning. Why was she suddenly acting like that? She had never been shy when it came to sex or talking about it. But right now, in that moment…

"Do you know why it felt like that?"

"I have a slight idea." Ha, slight. She knew perfectly well why it had felt different.

"I meant what I said earlier" Ben said after a few moments in silence.

"What?" she said, looking at him again.

"I love you, June" he replied, caressing her cheek. "I know you are probably freaking out again, but I needed to say it. I needed to get it out of my chest. And I know you aren't ready to say it back yet, but I don't care. I'll wait as long as it takes. Your body has done the talk for you and I'm fine with that."

"My body?"

"You just admitted it. We made love, it wasn't just sex. And it's felt different from all the other guys you've been with because you have feelings for me that you never had for them. But again, June" he said, cupping her face. "I don't want to put any pressure on you, you are in charge of the rhythm here. If you aren't ready, that's ok. I will wait. Because you are so worth it, June. You aren't like any other woman I've met before. You are amazing both on and off the pitch, a real role model for many women and girls out there. You fight for what you want, not caring about what the haters say."

"Haters like you, for example?"

"For example" Ben chuckled. "You have beauty and brains, and remember when I told you that my heart had never felt healthier than when I was kissing you? It wasn't just something cheesy to say. It was the truth. Even though you say it is broken, your heart is so big that it manages to fix everything that doesn't properly work on mine."

"Ben…"

"I love you, June Maxwell. I love you and I don't think I will ever get tired of saying it. Because you are talented, brilliant, incredible, amazing…"

"Are you quoting me again?" she laughed.

"I'm technically quoting Lady Gaga, not you" he shrugged. "But where was I? Oh, yes. Amazing, show stopping, spectacular…" 

"Shut up, Chilwell" she said, putting her finger on those lips of his that she adored.

"Make me" he smirked. 

"My pleasure" June smiled before kissing him and letting her body do the talking again, letting it be the one that told Ben what words couldn't just yet… That her heart wasn't broken anymore. That the same way she had fixed his, he had mended hers. That she also loved him. 

#ben chilwell #ben chilwell fanfic #ben chilwell imagine #football fanfic #football imagine

[dckweed]

ugh you guys ok so ive been in such a pissy mood lately and im still on season two of stranger things and ok so remember when i said i was gonna do a billy hate fuck smut???? well this is it. you're welcome :)

also please feel free to request, i also added billy to the list of Stranger Things characters that can be requested!!

billy still ain't it bc i think he's a total dick but the part where he cried after that interaction with his dad had me feeling bad for him just a teeny bit. and also dacre is just godly for me. but i in no way simp for billy.

warnings: rough sex for sure, maybe some hair pulling, scratching, possible biting, idk if ill make it a nice ending or if ill make it like they definitely hate each other fr but this is your warning for either of those, maybe some bruising bc i feel like this is gonna be really really rough idk if im missing anything else but p much this is probably going to be pure word porn so if you're a MINOR DO NOT READ THIS!

anywhore, i give you:

'FUCK THE HATE AWAY' billy hargrove x female!reader

Look, you hadn't meant to end up in this position, in the middle of your families kitchen, at your breakfast table no less, riding the hell out of Billy fucking Hargrove of all people, but god, you honestly didn't have control of yourself at this point.

How did you even get here? No seriously, how the fuck did you get here? You thought really hard, completely ignoring the pain burning in your thighs from the way you were moving, it really was quite the workout. You thought back to earlier in the day, how Billy who was oddly enough in your home-ec class had ended up being your pairing for a project. You honestly couldnt help the eye roll when his name had been called with your own, he hung out with your brother quite a bit and you knew how he acted. You thought he was an asshole, a bully.

He didn't seem to have a problem with the pairing though, hell, he probably thought that you would do the whole thing for the both of them, which you honestly didn't mind because at least then it would be done right, but you were shocked when he told you to meet him at his car after you finished getting things from your locker. Your brother was at football that day, and you honestly didn't want to wait around for him, so you begrudgingly took the opportunity of the ride home.

"So, what exactly are your expectations?" You ask, getting into the passenger seat, the black leather warm on your thighs. It had been an oddly warm day for the fall, and the sun has been shining down on it all day. You look at him as he gets into the driver's seat.

"What do you mean?" He asks, already an annoyed tone to his voice, you could practically feel the eye roll come on. He threw the car into drive and reversed out of his spot before you even had your seat belt on.

"I mean, are you expecting me to do the work?" You ask, turning to face the front, you were surprised how well he knew the way to your house, he'd only been there a handful of times and it was easy to get lost in the neighborhood. "Because if so, I was already planning on it, you didn't have to drive me home just to tell me."

Billy scoffs. "I was already planning on driving you home, I owed your brother a favor." He says, his hands fidgeting for a cigarette. You were already on his damn nerves. God, you irritated him, you and your perfect fucking voice, and your perfect smile and your perfect attitude. He didn't understand how you could be so nice all the time. "And, for the record, I am capable of doing a project like this. How hard could it be?"

You sighed, knowing damn well you were in for a long, long afternoon. You really hoped he was more the stand back and observe type, although to your disappointment, he was completely hands on.

It didn't take long to get home, and you went upstairs to throw your bag in your room and take off your jacket, staying in your skirt and blouse. By the time you had gotten back down to the kitchen he had already shrugged off his leather coat and threw it onto your kitchen table, he was in the middle of rolling his sleeves up when he turned to look at you, long hair trailing down his back.

"So, where's the flour?"

For nearly two hours the two of you worked, nicely enough at first, although it slowly became tense as the pair of you were at your wits end with each other. Your need to be in control, and his carefree attitude weren't mixing well and you were quite frankly ready to beat him over the head with your mom's rolling pin.

You had just pulled your third attempt at your project out of the oven, the edges burnt completely black. It had stayed in for ten minutes too long, Billy having forgotten to turn on the timer. "Dammit, that was the last of the flour and cherries!" You say, completely exasperated and almost in tears. You really wish he had just let you do it.

Billy just looks at it shrugging. "Honestly I don't even know why you're panicking so hard about it, it's not like we don't have the whole weekend to get it done." He says nonchalantly, as if he didn't comprehend that you weren't the type of person who didn't wait the whole weekend to get things done perfectly the first time around.

"The whole weekend? Are you insane? Im not spending the whole weekend working on a pie with you," You say, stomping your foot as you whine.

Billy looked at you, taking in your bratty attitude. He wasn't ashamed to admit, it kind of turned him on a little bit, all though, that also could have just been due to the fantasies he'd been having about how to shut you the fuck up the whole time you'd been working together. God you liked to talk alot.

He just shrugs and you groan.

"I fucking hate you and your stupid procrastinating personality, Hargrove." You grunt out, hands crossed over your chest. He leaned against the counter, red shirt unbuttoned half way, his sleeves rolled up. You weren't one to deny that he was damn good looking, but you still couldn't stand him.

Billy smirks, straightening up. "Likewise, sweetheart." He winks, looking at you as he takes a step closer. He was honestly going to grab his jacket to head out, he figured he'd let you cool off and see you tomorrow. You stepped closer to him, almost as if you were challenging him.

"And just where do you think you're going?" You ask, looking up at him, uncrossing your arms and putting your hands on your hips. "I didn't say we were done yet."

Billy had to admit, the bossy attitude was fucking hot right then, and he was definitely horny after what he'd been thinking about. "Bossy is a hot look on you, sweetheart." He says, stepping just a little bit closer to you. You roll your eyes, not expecting him to grab your chin in his hand, his fingers squeezing your cheek. "That was rather rude, Y/N, don't be a fucking brat."

You couldn't help the immediate turn on, god it had come out of nowhere and you generally wouldnt have let this happen, but fuck you were frustrated enough as it was, you didn't need to be left horny too. "And what are you gonna do about it, hm?" You ask, eyebrow raised at him.

Billy takes that as his invitation and thank fucking god because he wasn't planning on ending the weekend without fucking you at least once, he may have found you annoying as hell but you were definitely the hottest girl in school, and you had never paid him the time of day before now. Without another moments he closed what little bit of space was between the two of you and planted a rough, sloppy kiss on your mouth.

You groan at the sensation, moving your mouth with his almost too eagerly. He takes his hand off of your face, letting it travel down to the top of your blouse with his other one, taking a good grip at the collar and yanking on it. All of the buttons pop off and scatter to the ground, you make a noise of surprise and pull away but he reaches his hand behind you, smacking your ass roughly.

"Shut up." He grunts, letting your hands unbutton his shirt the rest of the way before starting to push you backwards towards the table, undoing his belt the entire way. He could already see how flustered you were and god damn it looked sexy on you.

Your back hits the table, and you shrug your blouse off of your shoulders, your bra straps too, letting it slide down to your torso, leaving you exposed to him.

You hear him suck in a breath his eyes on your chest, you half expect him to start playing with your breasts, it's what most guys you had been with had done, and you made a shocked noise when he used both of his hands to push you to your knees, his cock right in front of you, hard and ready, waiting to use you.

"Suck." He grunts out, taking a fist full of your hair. You do as told, taking him into your mouth eagerly. He throws his head back, a low sigh coming from his parted lips. "Fuck.." You Bob your head, taking him in farther every time, coating him with your saliva. You use your hands, wrapping both around him as you twist and suck, within a few moments he's thrusting his hips gently into your mouth, his hand gripping your hair tightly, fucking your face until you're a drooling, slobbering fucking mess all over him. "Sweetheart, you look so fucking perfect getting your mouth fucked like that, and i could come all the way down your fucking throat but, id rather fuck you first, because where the fuck is the fun if we can't both fuck the hate away?"

He pulls out of your mouth, and you groan. His hand drops your hair and goes to your throat, wrapping around it as he pulls you back to your feet. "On the fucking table," He says, pushing your skirt up your hips and pulling your panties down your legs as you settle onto the table edge, your legs spread nice and wide for him, your arousal shining in the light. "Such a little fucking whore aren't you, who knew that little miss perfect liked to be used like a toy?" He asks, he let his fingers roam up your pussy, hearing your small moan at the contact, fuck it was hotter than he had expected it to be. "Can your pussy take my cock as well as your mouth can? Hm? Can I fuck you good and hard?"

You give a breathless noise, looking up at him, legs already hooked around his fucking waist, eyes trailing down the exposed skin of his muscled torso. He really was as hot as you'd heard. "Fuck me already, Billy." You whine out, not in the mood for games, afraid you'd get caught by your brother or parents, but too turned on to stop him.

You didnt have to wait long, within moments he's pushed himself inside of you, his cock filling every fucking inch of you perfectly, your pussy swallowing him up perfectly. "Fuck.." You heard him groan again, his hips thrusting lightly at first before giving a long, sharp snap of a movement that has you throwing your head back, a string of curses escaping your mouth.

He keeps a steady pace, your table creaking and croaking underneath the weight of the two of you, him leaning over you, planing rough, wet kisses over your mouth to keep from screaming too loudly, he was afraid your neighbors would hear, or your brother if he decided to come home early. You pawed at his skin, your nails digging in and scratching down his chest as he lifted your hips in a way that made you arch back up into him, unable to help your bodies responses to him.

"Fucking hell, sweetheart." He groans out, picking you up completely and moving backwards to the chair behind him. Still bouncing you on his cock as he did. He say, giving your ass a nice two handed squeeze before slapping once, twice, leaving red marks he was sure. "Ride it, baby."

That was how ended up here, riding his cock like it was the last thing you'd ever do. Fuck you hated yourself for it, but god your pussy had never felt better. He leaned his head down, taking one of your tits in his mouth, his tongue rolling around your nipple, sucking on it the supple flesh. He couldn't receiving himself, he had to give it a nice hard bite. he smirked, feeling you shudder against his body, a squeaking noise coming from his mouth as you scratch your nails down his chest again, causing him to moan, slapping your ass roughly once more.

He could tell you were close to coming, he could tell by the look on your face and the way your body was moving against his own. He wasn't too far off either. He reached a hand up to your hair, tangling your hand in the locks as he angled your head against his own, watching your eyes. "Such a good fucking whore riding my cock like a fucking pro," He says, he figured you deserved some praise. "good fucking girl, gonna cum all over it, hm? cum all over my fucking cock like a good little slut..there you go, good girl." He grunts, your hips stuttering and a silent moan escaping your mouth. He wasn't too far behind, and within moments he lifted you off of him, leaning you back just enough that he could come all over your stomach, ruining your skirt as the hot, thick spurts hit it. "Fuck.." He sighs, sitting back in the chair, letting you catch your breath for a moment.

You looked like a goddess to him, you looked perfect with your hair messy, and your face red and flushed, but relaxed and calm looking. You looked at him, unable to stop the giggling that escaped your lips. He looked at you, eyebrow raised.

"I'm sorry." You says, a small smile on your face as you stand up slowly. You figured he wasn't the hanging around type, and you didn't want to keep him from whatever his plans were. "This just totally wasn't how I expected this to go."

Billy chuckles, pulling his jeans up and buckling them. "Glad I could be of service." He says, grabbing his jacket off the table. "I'll be back tomorrow, I'll bring cherries and flour." He says grabbing his keys.

He walks past you, giving you a light pat on your still exposed ass, he caught sight of your brothers car through the living room window as he came to the hallway. "He's home." He calls over his shoulder, sending you running up the stairs with a squeak.

@bloatedandlonly

#stranger things #stranger things smut #stranger things s2 #billy hargove smut #billy hargove x reader #billy hargrove

[bropunzeling]

For writing game, “and they were roommates!” (Hard mode: something other than Zegras-Drysdale or USNTDP or juniors etc guys who definitely were or reasonably could’ve been roommates at some point!)

ok setting aside that i did write another matty beniers/shane wright PURELY on the strength of shane being like oh yeah we're roommates (god i cannot wait for next season. can we fast forward), now i gotta think about who would be good fodder. the OBVIOUS answer 2 me is brady and timmy because of them (plus josh norris) living in mark stone's house (and timmy paying none rent).

i think they are ripe for a fic where like, hmm. oh ok the brain is whirring. fic where while they never got up to anything while being roommates in mark stone's house, but timmy had a deeply enormous, you could see it from space crush on brady. but also there was no way he was going to spit that out any time soon (risk it all? absolutely not. he wants brady to just KNOW timmy wants him to kiss him on the mouth and also fuck him until he cries). and brady had a girlfriend! there was no point. timmy is gonna get over himself.

smash cut to like, 5 ish years later. they are older. hmmm Reasons to get them back into living together. timmy's condo requires major home repairs. brady's latest relationship has evaporated on him and he lives in a place too big for one person. it is easy peasy to be like, yeah, timmy, come stay here while your plumbing gets fixed.

the thing is, they are still equally annoying roommates as they were five years ago. brady leaves his clothes everywhere. timmy eats everything he can see in the fridge and doesn't buy groceries to replace it. brady plays his music too loud. timmy leaves his clothes everywhere. but also -- it's not horrible? it's honestly pretty nice. brady likes having someone to come home with, and timmy also likes it -- living by himself got pretty lonely -- and it's comforting, and honestly brady's music isn't that bad, and timmy is getting better about ordering groceries. and they spend a lot of nights sitting on the couch, timmy's toes digging into brady's thigh, talking about how maybe, maybe this season is the season they turn things around, maybe, maybe this season will be good, and brady's hand rests on timmy's ankle, and when he looks at timmy he looks so fucking fond, like he's glad timmy's there to hear all of his worries, and the thing is timmy's glad to be there to hear all of brady's worries, and timmy wonders if brady can feel how hard his heart is beating from the thumb he's resting by the nub of timmy's ankle, and --

so maybe timmy hasn't gotten over himself yet. but he still can't say anything. things are good. brady isn't into him. there is no point. he'll figure out how to be less in love with brady sometime soon.

won't he?

#ask meme

[bereft-of-frogs]

the friday list ~

this is really covering like a week and a half, because with all the traveling and eclipse adventures, I didn't have much to update last week.

books:

Jawbone - Monica Ojeda: I finally finished this one. I think it went on just a little long for the structure, which was very stream-of-consciousness. There would be like, multiple pages with no paragraph or dialogue breaks. It was interesting, I still liked the vibe, but it ended up being kind of hard to get through.

(in-progress, for book club) This Wretched Valley - Jenny Kiefer: What I like about this book is it's doing a good job showing how annoying both rock climbing people and 'I can't go anywhere without my dog' people are without fully tipping over into completely insufferable. She's walking that line really well. The metaphors are a tiny bit much but I'm enjoying the atmosphere so far. Oh also, I'm struggling a tiny bit with how many dumb decisions they're making. Like, I get that there's something supernatural going on, but outdoor horror stories definitely have a very narrow margin for error between 'understandable mistakes' and 'why the fuck wouldn't you bring a second helmet or rope? why once there's a significant injury does it never occur to you to send one person hiking out to get help? WHY DON'T YOU HAVE ANY PAPER MAPS OR A COMPASS???????' Oh, wah, the GPS is broken, WHY ARE YOU RELYING SOLELY ON GPS IN THE FIRST PLACE? (ok sort of unfair because there's some spooky shit going on so even if they did everything right they wouldn't escape BUT that's even less of an excuse to have them make a bunch of dumb mistakes. Like isn't it MORE horrifying if you do everything right and still can't get out? Idk I just like competent characters and I wish more outdoor horror did the 'super competent characters make understandable mistakes or are caught by forces outside of their control' and less just went for the imo lazy 'idiots bumbling into doom'.)

(in-progress, phone book) Into the Dark - Claudia Gray: I had some bad scrolling moments there for a couple days, but I'm rededicated to not scrolling, catching up on the High Republic series instead. I'm a little over halfway, I forgot this book does one thing I find a little irksome, but it's a can of worms I don't want to open, iykyk kind of deal. Still love Reath though.

(in-progress) The Hobbit - JRR Tolkien: I don't often reread The Hobbit, but once I finished LOTR I thought I'd pick it up. It's always funny to me when Tolkien like, slips into a lore dump in the middle of his children's adventure novel. Like we'll be bopping around and suddenly he'll be like 'and in the days of the kings of old, when the Valar....' and there's just a paragraph with all the cadences of The Silmarillion before he kind of snaps back and remembers what they're doing and it's back to being a romp.

tv:

Severance (AppleTV): Oh my GOD. WHAT. This was so disturbing and so funny and I basically had a 45 minute heart attack during that finale. I can't wait for season 2, that was INSANE. I think my only critique is that I wish some of the twists had been signaled a bit earlier. I think I might rewatch to see if I pick up on any foreshadowing but I really didn't seen the twist about Mark's wife coming at all, like it wasn't even on my radar as a direction they could take. It felt like it was signaled then revealed seemingly within the same episode, and I thought maybe there could have been more hints earlier on. Though I think some worked to come out of nowhere, like who Helly really is.

Anthracite (Netflix): Short little 6 episode cult mystery on Netflix. It's kind of a frenetic pace which I think is partially purposeful style, and partially because they only have 6 episodes. I think I'd like to see the 10 episode version of this show, where they have a little more time to build the characters.

movies:

Train to Busan (2016): I had never actually seen this. It was a truly excellent zombie film. I cried.

Jigoku (1960): I'm back to trying to work through the Letterboxd Top 250 horror list, AND try to watch all the ones on Criterion so I can drop that subscription. Bit of a slow build, but the hell scenes were cool.

Zone of Interest (2023): Do I regret not seeing this in theaters? I don't know. I didn't because it didn't seem like I needed the big screen, but the more I heard about the sound design and now that I've seen it, yeah, I think it deserved the big speaker system and not my TV's kind of tinny speakers. The sound design was for sure the real star. Extremely disturbing and effective. Maybe it would have been TOO much seeing it in theaters.

Speak No Evil (2022): I get what they were trying to do but you can refer to my liveblog to see why it didn't quite work for me.

Monkey Man (2024): Omg I almost forgot to put this one? This was such a good action movie, Dev Patel is fantastic and the soundtrack is 10/10. I really enjoyed it, if you haven't seen it yet you 100% should.

video game update: got through Ilum in my perpetual Fallen Order playthrough. Which means: purple lightsaber time :)

craft update: I have reached the underarm join on my vest! Which is exciting because I'm so close to not needing to purl anymore but I did not think through a significant tool issue so before I actually join it up I have to either 1) find another #7 circular needle among my supplies, 2) buy another one, 3) possibly just buy another set of interchangeable needle tips? We'll see if I can JUST get the needle tips and it's not too expensive.

to do:

I have to do an errand I don't want to on my lunch hour. Boo. It involves paperwork and the DMV. I know it will probably not take as long as I'm imagining but. I don't wanna. I'm watching a video of a youtuber I like also deal with car registration as inspiration. Argh. Let this saga be over, before I can't deal with it anymore and drive my stupid car into the sea (I shouldn't joke about that someone actually did that like 6 months ago).

post office to hopefully finally finish the above saga

clean apartment

finish out the first week of my new running routine with about 2 miles tonight and then around 3ish tomorrow

writing goals: I think I figured out my block on chapter 7, so my goal for the next week is to finish a really rough draft of chapter 8, then retreat back to finishing up chapter 7 and then continuing on with the more polished version of chapter 8. I moved some things around. I don't think I have to kill a darling (a paragraph I really like). I think I found a place for it that doesn't completely break the characterization and logic, like the version I started with.

figure out knitting needle issue and/or finish detangling yarn so I can make progress on other project

I might go to home depot because I have a dresser I'd like to repaint, I've had the swatches picked out for a full year now, I just have to actually get the paint and sandpaper and such.

despair: oh my god my activity page is ruined. that post about fanon has over 10k notes. I'm gradually losing faith in the reading comprehension of this site (gradually?). pray that things lessen up a bit this week LOL But also #grateful no one has called me a bitch yet, small wins, I've just learned a lot about random discourse in other fandoms, no one's actually tried to start discourse with me yet

#long post #the friday list #lists lists lists

[fuckthisshitimin]

.

OK, just a little vent.

CW: mentions of domestic abuse/substance abuse

People gotta be fucking kinder.

And I've seen this post circulating about being kinder yourself and stop saying that 'people are bad' - and I agree, I so agree, I do believe that people are good, or neutral.

But kindness is a practice and it'd be so much easier to be kind if other people were kind.

Walking home I saw a woman crying on the street, sitting down in what looked like agony and there was one person who had been drawn to her and seemed kinda willing to help but mostly unhelpful so I stepped in asked if she needed/wanted help. It took a little time to get that her husband had just thrown her there and her back was too painful to get up.

Another guy walked by, called her by name and I thought she knew him. The three of us got her seating on some stairs, guy who knew her name went to 'get his phone' and never came back. She was real shaken up and what she said wasn't really cohesive but when she seemed to have gathered herself a bit she said she wanted to drink - I asked her if she wanted to take a minute to smoke a cigarette and see if she still wanted to get a drink after, if just a smoke could calm her down but she was adamant. Helpless guy who had stricken around was just like. No, alcohol bad - and that's true, and I don't know what the real perfect thing to do is here but I wasn't gonna make a decision for her just because I could so I took the money she gave me and went to buy her a beer. I got a little lost and helpless guy 'went to fetch me' (he never came back).

Time to calm down, to try and call one domestic abuse helpline that would fucking answer, but I didn't even know what to ask them. And when she told me she lived without her husband, I let that go.

We talked, she had a lot of trauma to dump, and it was hard, and I'm not a demon nor a saint, I wasn't gonna let her alone unable to fucking get up and crying and walk away but I was tired and growing a bit annoyed (and feeling guilty about being annoyed but I wanted to go home and rest) so I just. Sucked it up, and did what I deemed the good thing, I listened and when she reached out for my hand I took it and when she looked like she needed a hug I offered one and she clung onto me like no one has ever clung to me.

It was terrifying. She gripped and held and cried so hard and so long, she scratched bits of a sturdy leather jacket. She held me like she hadn't been held in a thousand years. I held her back as tightly as I could and it felt like there was no end to it, I felt like a failing lifeline and god that was so scary.

And I had asked before, by the way. If she had anyone she could call. She said the was no one - family sides with husband or doesn't care, no friends who'd come.

And when she finally ran out of tears she said I was the first. The first person to ever help her. The first woman, and I didn't correct her because this wasn't about me though it felt awful, and she felt so strongly about this, about me. She said we were sisters now, that she'd always wanted a sister and I saw her smile for the first time and should I have let her down then? Told her that actually I'm just a kind stranger I don't really care about her any more than I care about anyone. She's not my friend, and I don't love her, and it's not mean but it would have made her break apart and I knew it.

We talked more. And at some point she was laughing a lot, and never letting go of my hand and holding onto me still.

I spent three hours with her. And you know I'd be fine with that - I'd be fine with spending three hours wildly uncomfortable to help a stranger in need if this was that - if kindness wasn't so rare for some people they confuse it for love. She said we'd learn to cook together. She said my problems would be her problems now. That we'd be together forever through thick and thin.

I lied to her about work to get out of the interaction (when I saw she was okay enough to get up and let me walk her home).

And what the hell do I do with her. How do I break her heart to stop feeling so bad about it. I don't want to be her sibling, least of all her sister, and I do resent all the people who made her so lonely she grabbed my neck hard enough to ache.

Holding her made me sorer than dance class had.

I'm just. Trying to point where I did wrong. Because I don't think I'm a bad person but I feel like one.

And I want to be so rude. I want to push her away and tell her it's too tight, I want to tell her that I already have my people and that I don't need her here for me, I want to tell her than when she says she'll keep me safe she's the one scaring me, I want to be brutally honest but I don't want to destroy the joy I saw on her face, the disbelieving tenderness, the eagerness to love, the hunger for a human with her, I'd never say those things of course -

I'm sorry I can't save you feels so cold. So conceited too.

I'm sorry I don't want to love you sounds mean. But it's true.

And I'm sorry. And I hate to make this about me, about what I want but I gotta love my life I don't have any other.

If anyone read this to the end - well, thanks for taking my second-hand venting. And if there are any words of kindness you could afford to spare for me, I'd be grateful (and this won't bound us together I promise, stranger to stranger, a kind interaction can stand on its own).

#[meaningless statement] #vent #cw domestic abuse

[calypso-finale]

Forty Nine. Part 3

Aziel is so intrigued by Emi, he wants to look after her and I find it the cutest. He’s trying to help my mom by holding the bottle “maybe he will become a nanny” my mom said “maybe he will, he is very caring. I like the way he pulls a face at you when she cries, it’s like he is judging you for letting her cry” my mom chuckled “he was so good last night, Chris was saying how he just fell asleep straight away and I said it’s because of him, he loves Chris so much” Aziel hasn’t broke his gaze from Emi at all “mhmm it’s cute, he is close to him. I saw dad facetiming Oakley actually, dad then kicked the door shut like what the hell, I didn’t even do anything but I was walking by and I just see Oakley’ face on facetime with dad and Aziel, it was kins of dark so I couldn’t see him or what he is like now but dad did kick the door shut” I huffed out “dad did what?” my dad walked in “you kicked the door shut on me” I am not scared to say it “I did, I hate nosey people” he side eyed me “oh brother” I groaned out “but I didn’t want him to feel I am setting him up with a family get together, it was the first time he came on facetime with Aziel so it was just their time, big A what you doing? That is a woman’s job” here my dad go “Emi don’t know sign language, she is a loser” my mom scoffed “shut up, he is helping me by holding the bottle” my dad made his way over, moving my legs in a little but he still grabbed my ankle and moved them, he sat down right next to me and placed my legs over his lap “why are you in my space?” I questioned “I like to invade your privacy, problem?” nodding my head “I do have a problem really” I am joking with him, I love my dad so much. My phone started ringing in my pocket “if that is some nigga, tell them I will fuck them up” I chuckled as I looked at the I.D, it’s Rylee “whatever dad, hi” I answered her call “I will text you an address, please pick me up. Don’t say a thing, just please” I pulled a face “ok” before I could even finish off that sentence she put the phone down “stupid Junior, he put the phone down on me” rolling my eyes “he is goofy that kid” my phone pinged and Rylee has sent me an address “dad can I take your car?” my dad gripped my ankle “so who was it? How you going to lie to me?” oh he is right “ok, god. It’s my friend, she just wants to see me, please” I smiled at him “let her Chris, it’s nice she has her own independence, take his car. The easy driving ones, the G-Wagon, take that” my dad scoffed “if there is a mark on it, I am coming after you” getting up from the couch.

I hate being outside random houses, I am just sat here like a creep. Who is this house, I mean it’s got to be someone with money because it’s nice, but I am out here with no breakfast or anything. I came out as soon as I could because she could have been in trouble, I know if she would call Ti she would but she called me, taking in a deep breath. I am about to call her; I did text that I am outside. Grabbing my phone and I jumped in my seat, my eyes bulged out seeing Rylee right there “fuck! You bitch” unlocking the door for her to get in “what the fuck Rylee, you scared me you bitch” how annoying of her “sorry, just please drive” she groaned out “what happened to the rest of your friends?” I asked “Imani, please just fucking drive!” she shouted at me, locking my phone and placing it in the panel “ok but who’s house is this that you come out of?” I am nosey “I am hungry too” I added, she can feed me “then we can go and eat, just go!” she spat, I groaned out. Let me just drive because she is ready to drop kick me if I don’t do anything, driving ever so slowly still staring at the house. My eyes darted to Rylee and she is a mess, maybe sex with someone “mhmm” I just said “just shut up and drive, fuck” oh she is not well at all.

Rylee didn’t want to go inside so we go to the drive through, but she isn’t eating “thank you” I said to her, she paid “thank you for coming to get me” I smiled at her “Aziel is awake, Debbie was going to feed me something nice then this” turning in the seat, Rylee looked at me “can you tell mom to keep him for another day?” I laughed “no, you can. I am not doing it for you, also who is that home? I mean someone with money, what have you been up too?” this is crazy, I don’t understand “Kyle Kuzma house” letting out an oh “you didn’t did you?” I said “oh no, I didn’t but he may have you know kissed me like but I just couldn’t I stopped it and then he got mad, like I led him on and all that. When in real terms I wanted to get out of the club, but then North said house party at his house, them two got high, they was on drugs and I wasn’t, I couldn’t I had weed or whatever, I drank yeah. We at the party, people are just out of it, so much so like it was a drug party, after Kuzma and I kissed, I felt uneasy like I needed to go so I locked myself in the bathroom and then it hit like nine and I knew you would be awake. Just now coming out everyone is laid out; they are out of their minds. Celebrities I liked just there, snorting. I am flabbergasted, but  Kuzma said I led him on.  I didn’t he came to me, then he was saying you’re clean, I have the drugs and I said are you drugging people then and laughed, things happened, and we kissed it was just a kiss but I couldn’t” Rylee looked away from me “why would they put me in that situation when they know I don’t do that” Rylee started to cry “even when that happened the first thing I thought of was him, oh god. I hate life but yeah” she took in a deep breath “I think maybe the universe is telling me to stay out of LA, if I don’t then these people will eventually put me to them” reaching over and holding her hand “depression in the celebrity land of the kids is on a high, they have too much money and not enough strict parents Rylee. Maybe the universe is right” she is upset.

There is a lot of things I don’t get and it’s my sisters, I mean they say they don’t get me but I don’t get them, they do stupid things every time too. Putting the car in park outside Rylee’ home, she has been so quiet but I don’t get something “Rylee” I just said her name and paused ever so long, I just don’t want to upset her because she has been crying but I need an explanation “why did you let Kuzma kiss you?” Looking over at her “you clearly knew what you was doing, you said drinking and getting high ok, but you knew it was wrong, so why do it. Rylee I know you sister, you can tease someone so much until you don’t want it, you know how to roll like that and I ain’t mad at it but why?” I just need to understand it “maybe I was at that point but” she wiped her tears “when we kissed and then I knew instantly he wanted more I stopped it, I thought of him and it was all there in my mind” I sighed out “then go and get him, why are you here?” I don’t get it “because dad is right, he won’t want me. It’s too late, I don’t want to be this way but now what? Dad is right, it’s over” I have to laugh “you has changed so much, that Rylee that met that London rapper and you did the most. I remember when dad was so angry and then he said well your sister left the apartment and went shopping with this man! My friend, you kept leaving the apartment to see him, you in the apartment was flirting with him, you got what you wanted and now you’re defeated? Oh brother” I groaned out “because this is bad, like everything is bad. He’s blocked me on everything, and I just need to mourn the loss but like I tried and I’m still stuck on him, like mom and dad say I don’t know love, maybe I don’t, maybe I’m new to it but if it wasn’t something I wouldn’t be stuck on him, do you understand what I mean?” Nodding my head “dad was FaceTiming him with Aziel but he closed the door on me, I just heard Oakley saying he’s ok, but he’s ok because he’s at home and then that was it, I’m glad he’s ok because it was creepy when he left, look I totally get it. I just think Rylee if you really want him, you want it then you need to go back to basics. You have changed yourself and for what? Remember you told me he’s not attentive and then when you mess up he is, he actually does love you, but it was too late! It’s always the issue, men are always late with things which sucks for us girls. But I think you need to put your all into Aziel and just be good” I said “thank you Imani” she mumbled “this is coming from the most single girl here” Rylee laughed “most wise one, love you” she slid out of the car, she is tired.

My dad letting me drive his car is funny to me because I know he wouldn’t really want me too but he had no choice in it, I am his best child, he loves me the most “mom” I said as she skipped down the the hallway “you’re happy, let me find out this is a boy” before I could even speak my dad piped up “did you pick up your drunken sister?” Letting out an oh “yes oh, TMZ pictures of her going to Kuzma house with boozy besties?” Clearing my throat “I mean” before I could finish he was gone “oh Rylee” my mother huffed out “well you know now” walking behind her “so you did pick her up, and the nerve of her to ask me to keep Aziel again. Not the issue but if she is doing all that shit, North is not good” my mom is ranting “not really, look I took time because she was crying, can I talk to you” my mom stopped walking “I just think Rylee needs some advice, I know you don’t like Oakley, but I think she is missing him badly. She kissed Kuzma and then couldn’t stop thinking about him. Mom, you have done a lot with dad, well for dad to get him back so I think you can help her with that, I think you an help her to what to do, she is crying. I know you don’t see it for Oakley but it’s better then her being here with North, also she said that people are saying she doesn’t love him, she goes then how is it she is like this still” my mom is not impressed “too much has happened, she needs to get over it. Look Imani, it’s too far gone. Leave him alone to heal, she has to grow the fuck up. If she wants to do it then she has to go back to basics and do it herself, she probably has to catch him off guard too because in his eyes she will be cancelled, he won’t want to know but then if she does that, she is tying herself down to him is she even ready for that, Rylee has a lot of growing to do, maybe they will get back together one day” my mom touched my face “sorry if it’s not the answer you want but Rylee is her own person so her kissing Kuzma, that is another thing she has done, I really hope she can just leave him be, grow as parents” maybe I shouldn’t have told her that part, I wonder if she will tell dad, I hope not.

My dad is watching basketball with the boys and Emi, see how bored I am of this house. It’s just not pleasing to me because who the hell can I talk too “hey Amerie” I said “hey” she has Emi’ bottle in hand “dad, did you call Rylee?” I asked “you damn right I did, she is ignoring me” Amerie made her way back to me once she gave the bottle “what’s wrong?” we walked off “if you fucked up badly with a guy, like so bad and you hurt him bad because you cheated, this may or may not be about Rylee. And let’s say you just want him, but it’s kind of over on his side. What would you do?” Amerie is laughing “let’s just say you tried to like move on and it didn’t work, you ended up feeling more like shit. I am collating information” I said “and I love this person? Like I do but I messed up?” nodding my head “if I knew he is the one, that’s it I would fight for him. Like do the most, make him know I miss him, take it slow” nodding my head slowly “thank you, I love you Amerie” walking off to go to see my dad, I have to make this sound different “dad!” I spat; he is silent because he is watching the game “dad!” I shouted “shut up” he said “be kind, I have like a school project, it’s about the mind and what would you do, listen to me dad it’s interesting” sitting at the side of me “carry on then, hurry up” he is looking at me now “if you and mom broke up, which has happened but like it’s a mess, would you do to win her back?” I asked “survey’s don’t work like that” I scoffed “answer dad” I groaned out “kidnap her” he looked away from me “be serious dad” he chuckled “what you mean though? In context, I need more so I can plan it out” I need to be vague “cheating and you got kicked out” he whistled “oh damn, ok. That is hard you know, you see cheating is a big thing to come back from so full blown cheating, damn” I am going to get a good answer with my dad “I would need to be very dramatic, one of two ways. I would tell her I am going to top myself, like start acting out of character which I would anyways, I love her but the thing is. You need to get them alone, and it is going to be mentally draining because it’s going to be the biggest talk you will have, the talk has to be done with the mind, not the heart because you broke their heart, once you done that talk. You start aiming for the heart. You can also tell Rylee I want to speak to her, Imani Brown you aren’t slick” I gasped, my dad chuckled “you tell that daughter of mine Aziel ain’t leaving this house until she comes” of course my dad knew, he is annoying.

#Chrianna #Chrianna FF #Fanfic #Fanfiction #Chrianna Fanfic #Chrianna Fanfiction

[s6ngbird]

flowers from beneath — ACT I

series masterlist || navigation

[ warnings ] — m. masturbation, your mother being possessive, dacryphilia

[ pairing ] — hades!coriolanus snow x persephone!reader

[ a/n ] — this took a while to write and figure out what to do for it, enjoy tho!

[ beta read by my fav @etfrin ]

coriolanus was quite annoyed with your mother like usual

in all of his time of watching random people, he had never seen a mother more possessive of their child than yours, and frankly that scared him

he wanted you all to himself but so did your mother, and he wasn't even sure why. both of them knew that you were naïve and didn't have a clue about the world but was it because you were so pretty?

was your mother actually scared that because you were so beautiful, people would want to date you? he didn't see a problem in people wanting to date you (well he tried to not let it bother him) but your mother obviously did

coriolanus had seen one man after another get rejected by your mother when they wanted to court you, and it seemed like you had absolutely no say in any of it, even if you showed some interest in the suitor

this infuriated him, how were you supposed to grow up and learn about the world if your mother never allowed you to do a thing?

you never seemed bothered by her actions, accepting it over time because if you didn't she might lock you up like she had in the past

when you thought about it though, it didn't make sense to you or your friends when you told them

“y/n!” yelled a voice from behind you

you grinned and ran to clemensia, hugging her tightly 

“clemmie! oh my god have you seen the flowers?” you asked excitedly,  taking her hand and leading her to them

coriolanus smiled, seeing how happy you were to show your friend the flowers

he had retired to his room, not wanting to slip up again and let anyone (sejanus) see him smile. it would really kill his reputation for being evil and heartless

he found himself jerking off anytime he saw you smiling, wishing your smile would be directed at him one day

don't even get him started on seeing your tears, it was fucked up but you so pretty when you cried, he couldn't help it when he got hard at he sight of your tears

he liked watching you cry, imaging that you were crying while gagging on his cock

you would look so pretty doing it too, your tears streaming down your cheeks as you sucked his dick like a lollipop, gagging while trying to take even more even though you know you can only take so much

he would still be satisfied with you, telling you that it'll be ok if you're not able to take it all, licking the tears off your cheeks, and whispering praises to you for being such a good girl for him

coriolanus moaned at the thought of being able to do this to you, pumping his dick faster as he bit his pillow, trying to be as quiet as possible since there was some staff who would be roaming the halls

he finally came, groaning at the thought of your pretty face and thinking that maybe he should ask your mother to court you first before he did something worse

after he cleaned himself up, he put on some nice clothes and found sejanus, telling him that he was leaving for a bit and to watch over the underworld while he was gone

of course sejanus probably knew what coriolanus was going to do, smiling to himself as he left

as he ascended, he started to have some doubts about your mother again

did he not spend the whole morning being mad at her because she yet again rejected many suitors? yes but maybe because she actually knew coriolanus, her response might be different

yes…hopefully she would think that way if not he'd probably have to result to snatching you right in front of your mother

he finally came to a stop, recognizing the meadow he was in, the same one your house was in but more importantly, the same one he had watched you played in so many days

you had heard some rustling and looked over, eyes widening at the man, who looked over at you with a smile 

never in your life had you seen a man that looked so kind yet threatening at the same time

maybe he was only looking at you with kindness because the minute he looked at clemmie, there was no warmth

he went towards your house and you saw your mother's face drop, clearly she knew the man and probably was going to tell you to stay away from him because all men are dangerous or some shit like that

you hated when she did that because it felt like you didn't have a mind of your own, that you were merely a doll to her that wasn't allowed to be tainted

you're broken out of your thoughts when you hear your mother yelling angrily at the man, loud enough that the nymphs who were underwater could probably hear

“i said no coriolanus, get that through your thick skull! i’m not letting anyone touch my daughter, let alone a piece of shit like you!” your mother yelled angrily at the man

“and why not?! you never let anyone court her or even try and talk to her!” coriolanus yelled back, realizing that at this point he was never going to be able to have you with your mother's permission

he groaned, backing away as your mother continued to yell at him, following the path down to where you played in the meadow

you looked up as you heard footsteps, and the man, coriolanus, gave you a smile, taking your chin in his hand and stroking your cheek

it was weird but it felt nice so you allowed it, you also did not know of his intentions so to you this was just sweet, but your mother knew better, yelling at him again

coiolanus’ smile drops and leans close to you, feeling him breathing right next to you

“i'll see you again very soon doll”

#tom blyth #tom blyth x reader #tom blyth smut #tom blyth imagine #coriolanus snow #coriolanus x reader #coriolanus snow smut #coriolanus x you #the hunger games #the ballad of songbirds and snakes #tbosas #young coriolanus snow

[icarusthefoolish]

This is my stance on everything going on with Dream, including the stuff in his Newest Video "The Truth" in which he goes into Detail about everything. First and Foremost though, in my eyes a person is always innocent until proven guilty, the same thing applied to Dream i didn't believe the allegations until there was irrefutable evidence that he did do what people said he did. And anyone who still believes that Dream is a Groomer etc. just go ahead and get off my account, he has proven everything in his video so go watch that. If you don't want to do that and still want to believe the supposed Victims as an Example Amanda then get the fuck off my account.

My fucking god the shit going on with Dream was absolutely crazy, i never believed the allegations because in my mind someone is innocent until proven guilty. And Dream was never actually proven guilty of the shit people said he did. (Other than the Cheating of the world record. Where he had NO IDEA he was even cheating.) There was a time where i completely deleted Twitter simply because everything on my feed was just Dream Allegations and it was getting annoying.

And honestly i hope that the people who keep posting Allegations against dream saying he is a groomer etc just shut the fuck up. He posted a video where he explains Everything including the situation with Manatreed. He even explained that Manatreed was a childhood friend of his. He did so much shit to prove that he is innocent and that people are just being assholes to be assholes.

Saying someone has groomed you and providing "evidence" that can be refuted pretty easily is just a shit move, it makes actual victims look like they are lying, it makes it so much harder than it already is for those victims to get the fucking peace they deserve, it makes it harder for them to get their story out. People who actually go through grooming and other shit have genuine problems in their future life because of the Trauma stuff like that causes. So pretending you are a victim just to hate on someone or make people hate them is absolutely disgusting, it makes you look like a shitty person. There's a story about the boy who cried wolf, it's basically about a boy in a village who always said that the wolves are coming when they weren't, when the Wolves actually came no one believed him. Exactly that is eventually going to happen to you, if you continue to lie about things that didn't actually happen, if you continue to provide "evidence" that is just fake then at some point if you are as an example actually groomed people will not believe you because why would they if you've lied over and over just for the fucking attention.

This shit is why i sometimes absolutely hate the internet. People try to ruin someone's life simply because they can, we've seen it with Dream and recently on TikTok with a creator who offed themselves because people were speeding false rumors about them. This world and a lot of the people on it is just absolutely sick and twisted if people think Swatting someone's house for fucking funsies is ok because News flash it isn't.

I genuinely hope that people grow the fuck up and realise that not everything people say on the internet is actually true, i hope people fucking realise what lengths Dream went to to keep his Identity hidden before the Face Reveal, he literally covered any and all Windows in his parents home because he was paranoid, he went out of the house maybe 5 or 6 Times before the FR which was proven by a Phone call he added with his Mother. People need to grow up and realise being an asshole just to be an asshole isn't cool or funny, people need to fucking realise that the shit they are doing to as an example content Creators can actually ruin their lives.

#aiko talks #aikos shit posts

[thegodsyoudontconsider]

When she first fell from the sky, cast down from a place she could barely recall, she drew her first breath, all of cloud and shining blue, and her heart fluttered. Then her back struck the water and she was driven through with blinding pain.

Her second breath was of water. She thought she would drown.

A passing goddess, in repose on a nearby island, heard the thundering crack and awesome chorus of a god being born, and sent her attending nymphs from her pavilion to find them. Many cries and shouts were heard as the women clambered over the rocks, which was really quite annoying to the people living there as it was early in the morning.

Soon, a shout went up, greater than all the others, for a nymph had found someone, a nephropocentaur, carrying a woman up the craggy shore, and she was aglow with the indescribable light of creation. He lay her down in the grass and, with gentle application of his claws, held her arms to let her lungs drain with a flurry of spluttering coughs.

"I found her, hurt." Said the nephropocentaur, crustacean mouthparts clicking and gurgling, his words alight with awe. "She needed help."

The new goddess would remember these words. That moment stayed with her; not only because of the centaur's kindness, but because in her heart of hearts, something sprung up in response. Even as she cleared her lungs and was wrapped in dry cloths, her mind latched onto those words and the feeling that swelled in response. She would realize, later, that in that moment she had found a piece of her future domain.

The nymphs brought her to their lady's pavilion, overlooking the sea, to a room near the courtyard, and there they dried her and cleaned her and washed the salt from her long curling hair, and dressed her in fresh linens and satin and adorned her with pearls. But the goddess remained on guard, as the mucous grip of the sea still hung in her chest and a grating ache reverberated in her spine, and the warm yearning whisper of the first words she heard gripped her heart.

She was brought before the goddess of the pavilion, who was there holding court with a visiting lord of fiery mien that made a show of turning through his aspects like he was some burning jewel. There, she motioned for him to sit, and spoke to the young goddess pulled from the sea, first in the local tongue and then, seeing that she did not understand, in the Common Speech of the Void, which is known to all gods and is honed to many arts, and then she understood.

"I am the Queen of the Sundered Lands in the East, of a Sea People in brilliant bronze. I am called the Bright Lioness, The Ward of Good Health, the Lioness of Golden Tresses, and Goddess of Passions. My star is that which rises now, following that Bringer of Day, and my word is of Glory and Blood." said the goddess, and the people there in attendance bowed their heads in reverence.

"Ok," said the young goddess, who while in awe was too stressed to care, "what does any of that mean?"

The Queen, who knew young gods to be fevered with the light of the Unknowable Heaven, only smiled and answered; "You have fallen into my domain, and as such are part of my court."

"The fuck do you mean, 'part of your court?'" the goddess replied, suddenly enraged, "I nearly died just now! I've been here less than an hour, and 'you're majesty' is already trying to sign me up for....." she spun to look around her, linens flaring, at the increasingly horrified courtesans, "...this???"

The nymphs attending to the goddess tried to reach her, but her hair burned and coiled in bright vermillion and they were scared to touch her. "Well, listen up, Queen" said the goddess, and her eyes twisted her sudden fury blooming, "I may have just been 'born' or whatever it is an hour ago, but I'm already done with this--"

Then the Queen's face flashed with a dark fury, only for a second, but the young goddess saw enough to know the danger she was in. "--so, I'd really, really, like it if I could just...leave."

The court was silent, mortified. The visiting lord, who was also brash, let out a hearty laugh and applauded with four of his arms. The Queen, quieting her impulse, gestured to set her servants at ease.

"Do no worry, my darlings. This is perfectly normal for a newborn goddess." She rose from her seat then, her jewels clattering against her thin linen gown that shimmered against her skin, and she was very tall. "In fact, I quite enjoy your...passion." She spoke carefully, picking words like one would pick and eye from a seraph, and her gaze burned with a cool fire like metal spikes, and the goddess knew then that she was in peril. "Tell me, then, young goddess, what your name should be, and I will let you leave to rest."

"I...I don't really know my name yet." said the goddess, in part making herself mild against the wrath of the Queen, in part unsure if she should have found her name by now. "I-I think I am a goddess of...of feelings, but.....I haven't been around long enough." She thought back to the words the centaur had said, realizing now they had been in this common tongue, and sat for a second on how it had felt. "Right now, I...I'd want to be a goddess that helps people." Her hair became a whirl of color then, for even without knowing what to do, the goddess felt that it was right

The Queen smiled then, and her rage cooled, for she saw that this was good. "Very well, then." She lifted a string of ocean-teal jewels from about her neck and, striding forth, gently wove them through hthe goddess' hair as a headdress. "So shall you be, young goddess. Now, my nymphs shall take you to rest and bring you food, and we shall talk more when my court has concluded for the evening."

"Before that!" the goddess blurted, feeling at once admiration and dread and, as a result, desperate for something immutable, "...w-what's your name? Like, your real name?"

A great gasp went up then, for although it is expected for those visiting the Queen to know one of her names, the goddess had in naivete also asked for her Sacred Name, which is forbidden in all faiths.

The Queen only smiled, warm and cold at once, and in a low voice that only the goddess could hear, said; "I will give you my second name, which is 'Attar, Lady of Stars, but you, foam-born, will call me Estarte."

#creative writing

[protegetapaix]

4/10/23

1.20pm - morning,i woke up with puffy eyes,ikutkan hati nak duduk rumah nangis je but okaylah kuatkan diri,i deserve this trip. Im sti angry,hurt. I feel like you chose this trip over me by not even coming for me while youre still here. But part of me understands why ypu want it so bad,just that you couldnt understand on my end that,i let you go on the trip,but at that exact moment my emotions took over me my overthinking god. and you didnt came for me,you didnt understood me. im sorry for the hurtful words i said,but on my end i can still be angry,because you didnt came for me,you always do,you promised the lasy fallout we had would be the last where you didnt come for me.In the end i still came for you,i waited hours. I have to shower now bye

2.34pm - i reach jb alr sayang,so funny i uldated the gc i alr at checkpoint and they wtf and insisted to follow,tbh idw them fllw bcs got nad n ipan gf but im like wtv,part of me also thought if they came maybe youd come at night but my bad your bus is the next morning..

2.54pm - baru lepas custom sg now in bus to go jb

3.18pm - baru lepas custom jb now changing money den grab to sogo,our fav place

3.35pm - i reached sogo and bought my contact lenses alr rm500 worth of it wtfwtf hahahahah. I miss you

3.45pm - im at popular now to buy stationaries for my book hehe

4.33pm - idk how long i spent in there but damn i was pretty long your friends all waiting for me alr but idc. I didnt know which colours were nice,if you were here youd probably knew which one suits me right.. but i bought the rare beauty blusher ive always wanted and their lipstick too,i picked a pinkish shade smth i would nvr go for but the pink is quite subtle,cant waitt to show you hehe hopefully.

4.44pm - eventho da lambat.. i bought coffee HAHHAAHHAHA the one we bought at angsana but i bought the spanish latte yumyum

9.19pm - we reached the ikan bakar olace alr,the whole time we always infer about you here and there wishing you were here and allsz mostly me eh,cfm they annoyed sia lowkey but we hoping can come w youu.

Also ipan gf syirah spill sm tea sia.. even about nad…. HAHAHAHAHAHA

11.23pm - ok we at pasar karat now

1.13am - ok we home bebs i bought so much thrift shirt and i even bought for afiya n dania bubble bubblleee gun sehhhh HAHAHAH cant wait to show u,i walk around alone while they see see here there hehe healing siot

1.30am ok now i just at balcony smoking they karaoke all

1.50am im with them kat sofa they singing sad songs for me cb we even recorded a vid for u so u can watch when we go here tht next time. Why never see this airbnb sooner seh cfm fun sia with jusy you got board games ,karaoke projector all ohmyyy cant waitbfor your bday also seh

6/10/23

12.20am - im finally in sg sayang,my heart felt so heavy otw home knowing when i reach home i would break down god i miss you my amsyar

1.11am - i reached home idk what time im sorry for not updating,but i cleaned my thrash all to keep my mind off things,you specifically. Yet i still cried when i did all that.

3.28am - i love how im dking this,helps me cope seh its as though im talking to you but i have so much tea to tell you sia abiiii

11.50am - i in 187 now,i hope you enjoy your day today with your friends,jangan buat bukan2… i had major diarrhea jn damn and i also asked rusyd for off alr.

4.16 - i ended break already,i ate tangled hehehehe ok ttyl

8.48pm- I was smoking when she textsd me ,you broke my fucking heart. My love and trust for you. I ended things off with mama papa for real already,they kept asking convincing my heart couldnt take it in anymore i felt so numb till they just said,sarah sayang amsyar kan ? Sabar lah sikit ,sikit je insyaallah. I just teared and gave my salam and ended. I felt so bad they had so much more to say they kept saying eh eh dengar ni hahahaha,my heart cant.

i hope it was worth it my amsyar :)

[ptergwen]

hi uhm could you maybe write a blurb based on this tiktok? https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMeUVgjaS/

i love your writing!! 🤍

thank you lovely <3 i watched this and then i just stared at my phone and then i had to come here and write it because WOW? we’re going with peter

this is like very suggestive but i changed it a bit

prompt: you’re playing video games with your crush and his friends. you’re sitting on his lap and you lost. you’re bouncing and... you’ll see

“fuck!” mj yells at you, fingers digging into her controller. “i said go left!” “i did go left!” you insist and try to run from the explosion coming your way. “oh my god, no! not your left, my left!” she leads your characters out of the building with her lip between her teeth.

you’re playing one of peter’s and ned’s video games, but you’re not sure which. call of duty or something. all you know is, there’s lots of guns and yelling. also, that you suck at it. mj hasn’t been shy about telling you. she’s on your team, peter and ned versing you two. they’re worlds better because they play literally all the time.

tonight was supposed to be boy’s night until you crashed and brought mj along. ned was slightly annoyed at first. peter didn’t mind one bit, welcoming you in with a big cheesy grin. after talking it over, ned agreed to let you stay on the condition that you joined their game. it’s better with more players, anyway.

“oh, yeah. go a little slower,” mj huffs and continues running to the exit. you’re way behind her. “there’s an option to run, by the way.” “you think i know how to use that?” you retort, shifting on peter’s lap to get a better view of the tv. there wasn’t enough room on the couch, so this was the solution. your idea, for the record.

“peter, can you help me? i have no idea what i’m doing,” you nearly whine. his eyebrows furrowed, he looks from his controller to yours. “uh, yeah. you see those buttons at the top? you just-“ “dude!” ned scolds him. “you’re supposed to help me, not her!” they’re the ones who are trying to blow up you and mj. he sets off a few gunshots for emphasis.

“ok, ok. sorry. i’m on it.” peter starts to chase after you and mj again. he drops his voice to a whisper. “press the triangle, you’ll speed up,” he tells you so ned doesn’t hear. “thanks, pete. you’re really good with your fingers, huh?” you shoot him a small smirk, catching up to mj. he gulps and keeps his eyes glued to the screen.

there’s always been some... tension between you and peter. the truth is, you like him a lot. you want to do more on his lap than just play video games. he likes you times ten, though he’s not thrilled you chose right now to act on it. your constant flirting and moving around is becoming hard to handle. that’s not the only thing becoming hard to handle.

peter must have zoned out because he tunes back in to see game over on the tv. “no, no, no!” mj cries out and slams down her controller. “fuck you guys for real.” it sounds like him and ned won. “good one, dude!” ned reaches over mj to give peter a high five, who halfheartedly reciprocates. “i’m being player one from now on, look what happens!”

you glance at peter over your shoulder through dangerous eyes. “nice job,” you hum, leaning back ever so slightly. “thank you... thanks,” he simply replies. his mind is getting foggy with your body pressed into his like this. “is there a rematch? how does this shit work?” mj demands, scowling at the title card that displays your loss.

“we can go again, if you really want to.” ned beams and stands up from the couch. “let me get a victory snack first, though.” he ventures into the kitchen, mj side eyeing you and peter. “fine, but we’re switching partners. the lovebirds against you and me.” you turn to face her, your hips rutting against peter’s... oh. he prays to every god you don’t feel that.

“don’t call us that. we prefer lovers,” you joke back. “we do?” peter squeaks, earning a curious look from ned in the kitchen. he clears his throat promptly. “i mean, we do. totally. yeah. that was... funny, y/n.” “ok, it’s getting weird,” mj announces, hopping to her feet. “i’m gonna go raid your fridge, thanks. bye.”

once she’s gone, you spin around so you’re face to face with peter. all that freed up space on the couch, yet you’re still in his lap.

“so... that was odd. are you okay?” you wonder, moving so your legs are on either side of him. it’s more comfortable that way. for you, at least.“um, i’m fine. could you maybe just stop doing that?” peter winces and sets his hands on your hips. “doing what? i’m only sitting here.” you tilt your head to the side. you’re either playing dumb or actually oblivious.

“if you mean the flirting, i thought you liked it. i didn’t know i-“ that’s when you finally feel it. or rather, you feel peter. “shit,” you mumble to yourself. peter eases you back a bit with a pained smile. “i’m so sorry. i didn’t even realize i was...” you trail off, putting a hand on his chest to steady yourself. his cheeks burn bright pink.

“no, you’re fine. i’m the one who should be sorry,” peter nervously chuckles and squeezes your hips. “this is probably creepy... and gross. am i freaking you out?” “it’s normal, and you’re not,” you assure him with a smile. your free hand cups one of his warm cheeks, cool in contrast. “you do like the flirting, then?”

“love the flirting,” peter practically purrs at your touch. his grip on you becomes rougher as he’s reminded of his little friend. well, not little. “listen... i’m cool with playing another game,” he starts, eyes locking with your dazzling ones. “unless you wanna help me out. could be fun.” you lick across your lips, ready to go.

“which one’s your room again?”

when ned and mj come back to an empty couch riddled with the smell of musk, they can’t say they’re surprised.

#peter parker #peter parker smut #peter parker fluff #peter parker x reader #peter parker x y/n #peter parker x you #peter parker imagine #peter parker fanfiction #tom holland fluff #tom holland #tom holland smut #tom holland x reader #tom holland imagine #tom holland x you #tom holland fic

[satans-left-asscheeky]

ok but about fallout 4 companions and how they play dnd??? 👀👀👀👀👀

Maccready

OH MY GOD HE IS LIKE A KID IN A CANDY STORE.

You know those people who discover something, hyper fixate and then stay up all night learning everyday they can about it? Yeah that's mac.

His characters really do range and he's all over the place.

Shiny thing goblin. will hoard the gold

He likes playing as Ranger, Barbarian, rogue and bard the best but he really will play as anything.

His voice actor Matt Mercer is also super into DND too which I think is super fitting.

Hancock

Bard af

doesn't try to do anything productive during their play time

Wants to just dick around and see how many people he can bang and how much alcohol he can consume before dm gets tired of his shit

Ends up drawing on his character sheet and zoning out most of the time

Despite him being lazy in the game he actually really enjoys it

especially annoying everyone else

Cait

Says she doesn't really care to much about the game but always ends up getting really into it once she's there

BARBARIAN

Tries to solve every problem with her fists

Has killed important plot characters and fucked the party over on more than one occasion

Totally smuggles all the gold.

Danse

LAWFUL GOOD

Paladin obviously

Gets way to into it but unlike Cait he becomes a rigid role pusher

surprisingly besides the rule thing him and Mac enjoy playing together the most

Corrects the DM and pisses the party off.

Cait and him clash soooo hard.

Curie

The one that tries to drag the random NPC around because "They're baby"

Tries to bring every animal along

Also has animal perk too because did I mention she likes the animals?

Cried after Cait killed one of her beloved NPC

Lawful good/Neutral good always

Druid or cleric no in-between. But always a halfling

Always late to session but brings everyone snacks so it's okay

Deacon

Oh the poor, poor DM

Hes the one that wants to see how far off kilter he can push the story

Tries to derail the entire damn thing. Successes half the time

Makes horrible suggestions on purpose. Team for some reason follows his lead.

puts curie in his backpack for some reason. Has Cait kill important characters because "they looked dodgey". Points out to Danse that Dm isn't following the rules

CHAOTIC NEUTRAL

Rogue or bard

His favorite two characters were a jester who laughed instead of talked, and an arsonist who was terrified of fire and lit things in their sleep and didn't know it..

Piper

Dm

She writes all the campaigns SUPER in detail and cries when the party only uses like half of it.

tries her best to make everyone happy but somehow there's always fighting

Let's the party do pretty much anything with in reason.

She thinks Deacon doesn't understand the game....

Preston

OMG HIM AND CURIE ARE BEST FRIENDS!

He helps out every NPC with a sob story and it drives everyone crazy

Also falls ill to the "Let's drag this random npc around" disease

Takes souvenirs from everywhere the party goes

"Hey Dm can I pick that flower?"

"Hey Dm Can I take that stick?"

Hey Dm can I keep that key that opened only that one specific chest?"

Lawful good. Wizard but he's really bad at it

Nick

Wizard but he's really good at it.

Lowkey Sage.

Lawful good too 😔😔😔

Tries to save the party from Cait and Deacons bullshit

Lowkey likes playing with Danse 👀👀

his favs still are curie, mac and Preston though

is the glue that holds the party together

X6-88

He knows Deacons plan and throughly enjoys watching it take place.

He never actually plays or Dms he just spectators and sometimes helps dm write campaigns or come up with ideas.

Loves the chaos and discord. it's what gets him out of bed in the morning

#fallout #fallout 4 #fo4 companions #deacon #maccready #fallout 4 companions #paladin danse #john hancock #hancock #cait fo4 #cait fallout 4 #fallout 4 curie #fo4 curie #fallout curie #piper fallout 4 #piper fo4 #piper wright #preston garvy #fo4 preston #fo4 nick valentine #nick valentine #fo4 x6 88 #x6 88

[honeypiehotchner]

My Deep Blue Love (Tom Hiddleston x Fem!Reader) -- Soulmate AU one shot

This was 100% born out of boredom and loneliness and those damn Soulmate AU POV Tiktoks that I have seen practically 24/7 for the past WEEK on my fyp

(I’m not sure if I’ll do a part 2, rn I have no plans for it)

quick note on the technicality of this one: you lose all ability to see colors when you turn 12 and you don’t regain the ability until you meet your soulmate. but! you have to meet them in person and it has to be a mutual eye contact. pictures/videos of them don’t work, and if you just saw the back of their head or something in person, that doesn’t work either. it’s all about the shared eye contact babeyyy

small disclaimer: Brie Larson is mentioned in here and she has a wife, but that is very much only in this fic, and as far as i know Brie doesn’t have a wife irl lol (i also don’t know if she’s spoken about her sexuality at all so what i’m saying is take it with a grain of salt ok)

Summary: Everyone around you is meeting their soulmate, but you still see in black and white. You’re ready to give up, and basically have, when you lock eyes with your soulmate.

Warnings: None! Just a bit of angst, lots of fluff toward the end 

You knock on your mom’s bedroom door at 4:58am. She’s already awake, sitting up in bed, ushering you over.

With tears in your eyes, you crawl onto her bed, snuggling close to her chest.

“I don’t want to lose my colors,” you whimper.

“I know, baby,” she whispers, kissing the top of your head. “It’s okay.”

You were born 12 years ago on this day at 5:08am, so in a few short minutes, when you officially turn 12 years old, all color will drain from your life.

Or the colors could stay, but that’s only if you’ve somehow already met your soulmate. And that’s rare, nearly impossible.

You squeeze your eyes shut at 5:07 and you don’t open them again until 5:10.

The colors are gone.

+++

twenty years later

You sigh heavily as you receive yet another wedding invite. You are invited to witness the official beginning of Olivia and Jeffrey’s lives together as husband and wife, soulmates for all of time.

The glitter sticks to your fingertips, tiny black dots against your skin. Your friend told you it’s gold. You barely remember what that looks like.

Lately it seems like everyone has been meeting their soulmate. Just yesterday, you were having coffee with a friend when she looked up at the girl sitting behind you, and boom.

“It’s like the world just exploded,” she had said. Colors were everywhere. She immediately left you to go talk to the girl.

You don’t blame her for that. If you had met your soulmate, you probably would’ve done the same thing. But you can’t say for sure because you don’t know.

You wouldn’t be so cynical of it all if your boyfriend of five years didn’t meet his soulmate while the two of you were out at dinner. You wish you could say that he was faking it. But it was clear from his face (and the girl’s) that he wasn’t kidding. It was real. He had met his soulmate, and it wasn’t you.

It’s never you.

You’ve had guys cut off dates before they even start, all because they didn’t see colors when they laid their eyes on you. They refuse to even be friends with you.

All anyone is doing anymore is searching for a soulmate and it’s exhausting when none of them are yours. When all of your friends see color now. When everyone assures you that it’ll happen soon. What does soon even mean?

You grab your ice cream from the freezer and fall onto the couch, flicking to whatever channel has late night shows that aren’t complete garbage.

As usual, you find yourself watching a talk show, and tonight Tom Hiddleston is one of the guests.

You’re sort of familiar with him from a few movies, but other than that, you hardly know anything about him.

“So, Tom, we’ve all been wondering what’s going on with you and Brie Larson?”

“Brie?” Tom asks, clearly shocked to hear this question. “We’re just good friends, that’s all.”

“Oh, she doesn’t make you see any colors?”

“Ah, no, actually, she does not,” Tom chuckles, but doesn’t sound sad at all, surprisingly. “Her wife does that for her, not me, I’m afraid.”

“Oh really?” The host brushes past the mention of Brie’s wife and keeps the focus on Tom, of course. “So is that true, you still don’t see color?”

Your ears perk up at the mention of someone else not seeing in color. It’s rare for anyone to talk about this on television. Most celebrities don’t talk about whether or not they’ve found their soulmate, but more often than not, those that have are quite loud about it.

“Yes, that’s true,” Tom answers. “I still see the world in a lovely black and white.”

You snort, harshly jabbing your spoon into your ice cream. Lovely. Yeah, right.

“Do you really think it’s nice? Do you not miss the colors?” The host asks.

“No, no, I do. I do,” Tom admits. “But I like to think I’ll see them when the time is right.”

You groan, going to Google to look up his age. And when you see he’s 40, you groan even louder. He’s older than you and he still hasn’t met his soulmate. That’s just depressing. How can he sound so optimistic?

“Alright, well, if there’s one thing you wish you could tell your soulmate, what would it be? Maybe they’re watching right now, you never know.”

Tom smiles wide. “Maybe, maybe, um… Oh, so many things,” Tom exhales deeply. “I guess I could be cliché and say I can’t wait to meet them and wait for me, but I think I want to say… I think I want to say I understand. It is frustrating, still seeing in black and white, but our paths will cross soon, I’m sure of it. Until then, my eyes are blue.”

Blue. Blue.

You roll your eyes. You don’t even remember what the color looks like.

+++

seven months later

“I am not going to a movie premiere. You’re insane!”

“Please!” Your friend, Catherine, cries. “You’ll love it, I swear.”

You glare at her over your coffee. “That just makes it sound like you have a trick up your sleeve.”

“I don’t,” she says. “I just want you to take advantage of this and come with us! When will you ever have the chance to go to a movie premiere again?”

She has a point. Dammit. “Touché. How did you get tickets, anyway? Please tell me you didn’t spend thousands for this.” You wouldn’t put it past her, even though you tell her not to every time before she does something like this.

“God, no, Joe surprised me with them earlier. He said he went to school with the lead.”

“Oh. Cool. Who?”

“Tom Hiddleston, I think. Have you heard of him? He’s British, but that’s about all I know. Joe just said they ran into each other the other day and reconnected.”

You stop halfway through a sip of coffee, careful to not choke on it. Slowly, you nod. “Yeah. I...I’ve seen him in a couple things.”

“Apparently, he hasn’t met his soulmate either…” Catherine trails away, raising her eyebrows at you.

You roll your eyes. “I heard,” you set your cup down. “He’s probably met them by now though since he blasted it on television like that.”

“Or he’s still searching and you’re still being too cynical.”

“You’re probably right,” you chuckle.

“Sooo, you’ll come?”

You sigh heavily. “As long as you help me pick something to wear.”

+++

“I’m regretting letting you talk me into this already,” you mutter when you nearly trip in your heels.

“Oh, hush,” Catherine swats your arm. “It’s an excuse to get dressed up and look hot for no reason. Take it.”

“Fine.”

Catherine’s soulmate, Joe, was whisked away almost as soon as the three of you stepped inside the venue by some director (you think), but he promised to return in a few minutes. Catherine told him not to worry. She’s used to him being dragged away for conversation. You can see from her face that she’s more proud of him than anything, and not at all annoyed.

Currently, you and Catherine are standing near the small bar, waiting for them to announce that it’s time to take your seats. You desperately want a drink, but part of you knows it would be a bad idea.

One glass of wine can’t hurt, though. Maybe it’ll take your mind off the pain in your feet.

You peel away from Catherine when you see Joe coming back, and you flag the bartender down quickly.

After ordering a glass of white wine, you wait patiently, wishing you had chosen a dress with sleeves. It’s fucking cold in here.

“Darling, you’re shivering, are you alright?”

Your head turns toward the smooth voice, face set and mind trying to decipher whether or not it was a sincere or creepy comment when the world quite literally explodes.

There, standing beside you, concern written all over his face, is Tom Hiddleston. Only now the concern has washed away into awe when your eyes lock with his.

“Oh my god,” he whispers, stumbling even though he’s standing in place.

“Blue,” you murmur. “Your eyes are blue.” Without even thinking or asking, your hand lifts to cup his cheek, and then you pull back, “Shit, sorry—”

But he grabs your wrist gently, placing your palm on his cheek. “It’s alright.” His thumb strokes the back of your hand. “I have been looking everywhere for you.”

“I thought you didn’t exist,” you whisper in reply. But here he is. His eyes are blue, his lips are pink, he has tiny brown freckles all over his rosy cheeks. You look back to his eyes, narrowing your own. “You liar. Your eyes have green in them, too.”

“Do they really?” Tom chuckles. “I never would’ve known.”

“That’s why you have me,” you tease, and you don’t know where any of this is coming from, yet it doesn’t feel like you’re pretending. It feels like you’re finally yourself.

His other hand tangles with yours as he nods. “That’s why I have you, indeed.”

At this time, the lights in the theatre begin lightly flashing, signaling that it’s time for everyone to begin making their way to their seats.

But neither you or Tom move one inch.

The only issue is people are beginning to stare.

You notice it first, so you slowly pull your hand from his cheek. This movement shocks him back to reality, too, and he blinks a few times, yet he doesn’t let go of your hand.

“I, um, I have to make a speech,” he says. “But then I can come back to you. Will you save me a seat?”

“Don’t you have to sit up front?”

He nods. “I do, but—”

“Then I’ll come with you.” You aren’t sure if it’s the fact that he hasn’t let go of your hand yet, or if it’s because you’ve been waiting so long that now you don’t want him to be further than an arms length away from you, but you mean what you say.

“Are you sure?” He asks, but you both need to make a decision quickly because you can see someone waving from the wings, most likely trying to get Tom’s attention.

“I’m sure.”

He doesn’t question it, in fact, he grins, and brings your hand up to his lips, kissing your knuckles. “Let’s go, then.”

#tom hiddleston #tom hiddleston x fem!reader #tom hiddleston x reader #tom hiddleston x you #tom hiddleston x soulmate!reader #tom hiddleston soulmate au #soulmate au #tom hiddleston one shot #tom hiddleston fluff #tom hiddleston fanfic #tom hiddleston fanfiction #completely self indulgent #as always

[duskholland]

ok but what about going to the gym with boyfriend!tom (i always workout alone and i have my gym crushes here and there) and Tom gets so worked up about it and when she notices she begins teasing him.........and smut happens 👀

obsessed with this.... i love a gym/post-workout moment... nsfw! minors dni <3

✧———clearing out my askbox!———✧

smut warnings ↠ semi-public sex, shower sex, hair pulling (ft brief pain kink), fingering, unprotected sex, cumshot.

——————

“Another five, darling. There you go. Keep going.”

Sweat prickles along your hairline, your face pulsing with hot blood. With each burpee, you feel your heartbeat quicken and your body get more tired, but you aren’t about to give up. Not with Tom, your boyfriend, poised in front of you, jumping up and down in sync with you.

He’s ridiculously attractive, even when he’s bossing you around in the gym. It’s been the cause of a few teasing comments from him already, as he’s caught you out taking breaks to ogle him. In your defence, it’d be hard not to look. 

Tom is in a pair of shorts and a tight black tank top, his biceps out and flexing every time he swings his arms around. His hair lies over his head in messy heaps, and his cheeks lie flushed with a healthy glow. Adrenaline looks good on Tom, and you can’t even be annoyed that he’s pushing you to go further because it’s so attractive coming from him.

“Fuck yeah,” he says finally. “We’re done.”

You finish your set and release a sound of relief, sagging forward and falling into his embrace. Tom laughs, his chest heaving as he holds you in a loose, sweaty hug. His neck is hot with perspiration, but you don’t hesitate to curl closer, savouring the brief moment of respite in his arms.

“You’re so mean,” you whine. You finally fall back, just to bend over and grab your water bottle from the spot on the mat. You take a few deep swallows of cool water before Tom grabs the bottle from your hands and shoves it past his own lips. “I’m so tired.”

Tom hums, jaw tensing as he swallows down mouthfuls of the water. “You’ll feel good, though. All those positive endorphins,” he says, grinning slyly. “I want to do some weights before we go, but I think that’s enough cardio for today.”

You make a loud sound of agreement. “Definitely,” you agree. You wave your hand at the exercise mats. “I’ll just do some stretches and wait for you.”

He nods and darts forwards to kiss your cheek before letting you go. “Okay, love,” he says. “I’ll just be over there.”

The gym is fairly empty this morning, and you’re able to find a spot on the edge of the exercise mats without much trouble. As you sit down on the squashy sprung mat, you pull your arms above your head and start to stretch out your shoulders. The weights station is directly opposite the mat zone, so you’re able to watch Tom as he browses the weights trolley before picking off a large dumbbell. 

You find yourself biting your lower lip as you watch him sit on the edge of a bench and start to pump it. Tom spots you staring, and you watch him smirk. He wiggles his brows before sitting up a little straighter to flex his muscles with more vigour. If you weren’t in public, you’d growl, the sight of his pulsing arms, flushed face and ripped figure making a hot flush travels out from your centre. As Tom licks his lips and intensifies his smirk, you find yourself shivering.

Two can play at this game.

You stand from the mat, biting your lip as a devious thought tickles you. Meeting his eyes, you raise a brow in question before turning around and facing the wall. You can feel Tom’s gaze on your figure, burning intently as you start to do some squats. The exercise is his weakness, especially when you do it, and you’re cruel for exploiting that information, but you find yourself smirking as you continue to drop low, arching your back and taking your time. 

To any casual observer, it’d just look like you’re very attentively exercising, but to Tom, you know you’re driving him mad.

There are mirrors set into the wall, and you watch as Tom abandons his exercise in favour of sitting there to watch you, jaw tensing. You meet his gaze through the reflection and flash a teasing smile, only for it to melt into fulfilment as you watch Tom mutter something to himself then stand up quickly. He hurries to put away the weight before picking up his phone and stalks towards you, his lean figure stacked with sweaty muscles.

He lingers behind you for a moment, eyes taking you in as you do a few low squats. Through the mirror, you can see his nostrils flare, his eyes shifting dark and heady. When you finish your set, you straighten up before stepping back a few paces to press your back against Tom’s front. He mutters a low, “fuck,” and you feel his member, quickly hardening as his crotch rubs against your ass.

“Darling,” Tom mutters, scooping your hair out of the way until he’s able to kiss your neck. Your skin is hot and sweaty, but he doesn’t hesitate to nibble up and down the side of your throat. “‘M so hard right now.”

You shiver as he laps over the sensitive skin of your neck. “Do you want to go home?”

Tom grumbles into your ear. “I can’t wait that long,” he complains, voice low and accented. “You look so hot, love. I’ve got a stiffy.”

Biting your lip, you turn around and take his hand. “Well,” you tease, “have you got anything in mind?”

He nods his head. “Yep,” Tom says. “Follow me.”

Tom takes you down to the unisex changing room, and you catch onto his idea as he points at some of the large shower cubicles. They’re each caged in with frosted glass, and like the gym had been, the room is unusually empty. There are a few people milling around, but no one else is in the shower room.

You bite your lip as you look at him. “Really?” you ask, but you’re already pulling off your shirt. Tom stands across the bench from you, similarly jerking off his tank top.

His eyes sparkle. “Fuck yeah,” he growls. “Did I tell you how hot you look in those leggings?”

After a little bit of negotiating with your clothes, the towels and the lockers, Tom pulls you into the shower cubicle. He turns on the water before pushing you up against the wall, caging you in with an arm planted on either side of your head as his lips find yours. You’re both naked now, your clothes discarded back in the locker, and you have to bite back a loud moan when you feel Tom’s hard cock slide to rest between the soft flesh of your thighs.

“Shhhh,” he murmurs, speaking into your ear. Tom pulls one arm away from your head and snakes his hand between your legs. He smirks as his index finger slips between your folds, rolling over your clit before shifting down to tease your entrance. You’re already wet, your body hot and aching from the time spend watching him work out upstairs, and you feel your hole pulsing and spasming against his finger as he curls it into your heat. “Anyone could walk in, baby... you’ll need to be really quiet.”

“Okay,” you manage. Your head falls back against the cool tiles of the back wall as you part your legs, allowing Tom to feed two of his fingers into your pulsing cunt. His lips close over your neck as he works you open, cock still brushing up against your thighs. You have to swallow a moan when he adds his thumb to your clit. “Shit,” you whine.

You reach up and run your hands over his shoulders, momentarily getting distracted by the muscles on his form. Tom’s been working out consistently for the past six months, and the evidence can be found in the definition of his shoulders and biceps. His muscles are so firm, and as you appreciate his strength with your hands, you feel yourself clench around his digits.

Tom smirks, leaning up to nose at your cheek. “Are you okay there, lovie? You seem a little distracted.”

You scrunch the tip of your nose as you twist a hand into Tom’s hair. His strands are saturated with droplets from the shower, and he’s still grinning as you bring him closer to kiss him.

“Fuck me,” you mutter against his lips. You gasp softly as he curves his fingers up towards your stomach, the tips of his slender digits caressing your g-spot until you whimper. You feel so slick, the space between your thighs coated with your arousal. “Do it hard. From behind.”

Tom licks his lips. He captures your mouth in a final kiss as he pulls away from you. An annoyed whimper slips from your lips as your cunt throbs emptily, but your mood is soon to pick up as he turns you in his arms. With his back pressed to yours, you can feel Tom’s erect cock, standing proud against your lower spine.

“You’ll let me hit it from the back?” he mutters, nipping at your neck. Tom’s large hands swoop around to cup your breasts, his fingers toying with your nipples as you gasp.

“Yeah,” you say. You bend over, reaching out to hold onto the metal control taps of the shower as you spread your legs and arch your back. You look back over your shoulder, eyes darkening as you watch Tom situate himself behind you, pumping his flushed cock in his hand as his jaw tenses. He curses as he meets your eyes. “Hard and fast,” you request. “Please.” You’re buzzing from the endorphins from your workout, and you find yourself craving your boyfriend’s firm touch.

Tom nods his head. A focused expression finds his face as he steps closer, resting one hand on your ass as the other stays wrapped around his length. You bite back a soft moan as he slides his tip between your folds, teasing your clit for a second before guiding his bulging crown up to your entrance.

“Are you ready?” he asks, voice barely audible above the stream of water pounding down beside you.

You bite your lower lip. “Fuck yeah,” you mutter. “Give it to me.”

Tom slips into you with ease, and your eyes drop shut as your head falls forward.

“Oh god yeah,” Tom mutters, burying himself deep within your heat. You bite your lower lip to muffle your cries as his thick cock presses your walls apart. “You’re so tight, darling. Oh fuck. Cunt feels like fucking paradise… Always so snug around me, isn’t it?”

You’re glad for the loud stream of water and the garish pop tunes that stream through the air because the noises of skin slapping against skin are audible to you. Your fingers wrap around the cool metal of the shower controls as you cling for dear life, your breathing laboured as Tom thrusts into you like a demon. As he shifts both hands down to grasp at your hips, the engorged head of his cock brushes up against your g-spot. Your back arches when he hits against your spongy back wall, causing your heat to tighten.

“Oh fuck,” Tom murmurs from behind you, his voice sharp and breathless. He squeezes your waist as he continues to pull you back to meet him, each rut of his hips against yours propelling him deeper. After a while, he shifts one hand away, hot fingertips dancing up your spine before burying into your hair. As Tom tugs on your strands, the ache in your skull makes you whimper. “Touch your clit, darling,” he asks, keeping his voice quiet.

When he releases your hair, you follow his instructions blindly, unable to think of anything beyond how good it feels to get railed like this. It’s clear that both of you are riding on the highs of your workout, Tom’s pace brutal as he spends all his leftover energy on you. You’re willing to take it, your greedy cunt revelling in the bruising pace he’s set and basking in the glow of his length stretching you out so well. 

Mixing in with the sounds of water thrumming against the tiled floor comes the sound of your puckering heat, clinging to his cock each time he buries himself in you. Quiet expletives tumble from your lips as you get to the edge, unable to vocalise your enjoyment but instead falling into the rhythm of pushing back against Tom every time he snaps his hips. With the way his fingers grow needier, holding at your hips with a slippery grip that only grows messier, you can tell he’s just as close as you. 

It doesn’t surprise you at all when Tom suddenly gasps, then you feel his cock start to throb inside you as his rhythm falters. The sensation of him shooting his seed into your desperate heat makes you spiral over the edge. You grip the bar of the shower tighter as you bite into the top of your arm to muffle your moans.

Tom slowly evens out his pace, continuing to fuck into you until you stand up a little straighter. He runs his hands over your ass and waist before stepping back, the discomfort of him pulling out quickly smoothed away when he gently coaxes you up and into his arms.

“So good, darling,” he whispers, holding you to his chest. His lips come down over the side of your face as his hands play with your wet hair. When you shiver, Tom walks both of you back, helping you into the stream of warm water. “You always do so well for me. Best girl, aren’t you? My best girl.”

He’s cooing and gentle, holding you with love in his arms and tenderness shining in his gaze. When you’re more stable, you pull away from his chest, feeling beads of his cum dripping down your inner thighs as you lean up to steal a kiss from his lips.

“Love you,” you mumble, folding into his arms.

Tom’s hands gently caress your spine, and you can feel him smile against your lips. He squeezes your ass with the palms of his hands before releasing you.

“Love you too,” he says. He reaches behind you and pumps the soap dispenser, lips brushing the top of your nose as he runs the lathering liquid over your wet form. “I’ll clean you up now,” he promises.

You bite your lip as you look up at him, blinking innocently. “You made a mess,” you say, thinking about your pussy, still clenching around droplets of his seed.

Tom arches a brow, eyes momentarily dipping down to your legs. A shadow of a smirk crosses his lips a moment later, then he’s pressing them back against your ear.

“Well,” he purrs, tone heavy and suggestive, “I think I know what I can do to help clean you up…”

#this is 2.5k ! #tom holland smut #tom holland x reader smut #tom holland blurb #tom holland smut blurb #tom holland fanfic #myblurbs #tomblurbs #tom.filth #q