Tumgik
#funny books
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Old thrift shop books.
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everbluems · 30 days
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“If you punch me back, you will be sent home, Pixie.” I kick him in the shin.
— Red Rising by Pierce Brown
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misskaboom · 5 months
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Good morning 🖤😜📕🍭
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katmajik · 6 days
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💿 ᴏɴᴄᴇ ᴜᴘᴏɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴇᴀʀʟʏ 2000ꜱ…
Trixie Taylor is asexual—she just doesn’t know that’s an option. So imagine her consternation, when the deadline for the virginity pact she made in eighth grade is now upon her. It’s her last high school party, and the entire graduating class has heard that Trixie’s ready to swipe her V-card tonight.
So. No time to panic.
Ready or not, she’s got someone in mind to help her…
Riot Shane is every bit the loser virgin his friends roast him for being, and way more than his rebel reputation suggests (things would be different if he’d get his GED and a haircut, but oh well). When incurable crush Trixie Taylor asks for his help, Riot finds himself playing fake boyfriend, real bodyguard, and the house party’s errand boy. 
Welp. At least responsibility’s never looked as good as it does with his dream girl in the passenger seat.
Ready or not, the night’s only just begun…
ʜᴏᴡ ᴛᴏ ꜱᴜʀᴠɪᴠᴇ ᴀ ᴛᴇᴇɴ ꜱᴇx ᴄᴏᴍᴇᴅʏ : a millennial coming-of-age parody, is COMING SOON. follow the author for updates at these links!
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rotten-whispers · 4 months
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Support an LGBTQ+ artist and author by giving the gift of insanity this holiday season!
Check out our silly sci fi novel, Tales from a Mall! Or check out one of our cursed stickers at Molespignoses on Redbubble
Stay crazy, ya'll!
Baroque Forrest
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My rating of The Iron Trial:(please read)
OMG I LOVED THIS!!!! IT DEFINITELY CAN RIVAL YHE LIGHTING THIEF AND THE PHILOSOPER’S STONE!!! The world and plot is unique and the magic system is so so so good.
I love the characters, they all got something going on. Call is definitely my favorite character, I like his personality and the fact that he’s morally gray.
The relationship between the main trio is wonderful and strong. I also love how even tho Call is the mc he isn’t the “chosen one” and that Aaron is more like that. But what I really wanna talk about is the plot twist. Because what. The. Fuck. I never ever saw that coming like??? It’s definitely unique for me and also supports the fact that Call is definitely not the chosen one in this story bcs he got an another role even tho he doesn’t want it.
The only problem I have is that the fandom is so so small;( I don’t understand why because it’s made by two extremely popular and successful writers and it’s seriously as good as Pjo. Maybe i understand later in the books but don’t give away any spoilers!!
For those who have never heard of this book:
“Think you know magic? Think again. The Magisterium awaits... During your time at the Magisterium, there will be five trials to complete — one for each school year. They will test your magical skill, your endurance and your ability to handle dark and dangerous situations. It begins with the Iron Trial . . .”
“Most kids would do anything to pass the Iron Trial. Not Callum Hunt. He wants to fail. All his life, Call has been warned by his father to stay away from magic. If he succeeds at the Iron Trial and is admitted into the Magisterium, he is sure it can only mean bad things for him. So he tries his best to do his worst -- and fails at failing. Now the Magisterium awaits him. It's a place that's both sensational and sinister, with dark ties to his past and a twisty path to his future. The Iron Trial is just the beginning, for the biggest test is still to come . . .“
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This is the cover for the first book. Call is on the left(the mc)(the fact that he’s not in the middle but Aaron is just shows my opinion that Aaron is the “chosen one”) Aaron is in the middle and Tamara is on the right.
It’s not a long book so please consider reading it, I’m really begging you(´༎ຶོρ༎ຶོ`)
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supersonic813 · 11 months
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When my mom tries to clean my (messy) room
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heathercauthor · 1 year
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Incorrect Earth Sucks quote
Cheske: alright, why are you in trouble now
Feng: promise not to get mad
Cheske: sure
Feng: Look, I was minding my own business—
Cheske: BULLSHIT
Feng: I WAS
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candont · 6 days
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everbluems · 30 days
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Sevro snorts. “What do you think I’ve been doing this whole time, you silky turd? Wanking off in the bushes?”
Cassius and I look at each other.
“Kind of,” I say.
“Yeah, actually,” Cassius agrees.
Red Rising by Pierce Brown
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rogue-indshadows · 2 months
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IN FOUR AUNTIES AND A WEDDING - Meddy and the dashing Aunties are back, now it's time for meddy's 💒wedding with Nathan. Instead of having Ma and the aunties cater to her 👰🤵 wedding, Meddy wants them to enjoy the day as guests. As a compromise, they find the perfect wedding vendors: a Chinese-Indonesian family-run company just like theirs. Meddy is hesitant at first, but she hits it off right away with the wedding photographer, Staphanie.
In London, Day before the wedding 💍 things however seems to go wrong when meddy over hears real truth about Staphanie and her family and there own ulterior motives which may turn Meddy's wedding scene in murder scene. But NO WORRIES aunties are ready to swoop in and save her special day.
Review- OOOOOOOMMMMMMGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!! I couldn't stop laughing 😁😁 this one was even more hilarious and funny than the first book, the aunties are really kickass amazing women ever 🙌🙌🙌🙌. More drama more mayhem more fun. I thoroughly enjoyed reading this lovely book. It relies more on how family swoops in to save each other ❤❤❤ and help each other no matter what : which is richly highlighted throughout the book. Wish there were more scenes with Nathan, cuz it felt he was kinda left out.
I liked this but didn't love it as much as 1st one. Was OK not good not bad. Felt was kinda missing some magic or spark.
3.5 stars🌟
Definitely good 📖 to try on vacation or some fun cozy easy reads ✨
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katmajik · 7 months
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💞 BUY LINKS + SOCIAL MEDIA
(book description under the cut)
𝙒𝙝𝙖𝙩’𝙨 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙖𝙩 𝙛𝙞𝙧𝙨𝙩 𝙨𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙖 𝙡𝙞𝙩𝙩𝙡𝙚 𝙘𝙧𝙞𝙨𝙞𝙨 𝙤𝙛 𝙨𝙚𝙭𝙪𝙖𝙡 𝙞𝙙𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙞𝙩𝙮?
Milo Lamoree is livin’ the glamorous life of a sex shop sales rep, forever explaining to grown adults what they should and should not be sticking inside of themselves and/or others. He’s not doing any 𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙘𝙠𝙞𝙣𝙜 himself—his demisexuality hasn’t exactly enticed any “hot young singles in your area.” But considering his clientele’s whackadoo misconceptions about anatomy, etc., it’s not like Milo has the leftover energy to fall in love, anyway.
…Well, 𝙩𝙤𝙤 𝙗𝙖𝙙.
Stevie Hart has heard it said that being bisexual means you have more options, meanwhile she has experienced that 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙖𝙩 𝙖𝙡𝙡. Her love life is all unsolicited—𝙖𝙝𝙚𝙢—pics (you know the ones) and straight couples looking for an experimental third. No thanks. When you’re already managing your own debilitating agoraphobia, who has time to deal with whatever’s going on with those people? Falling in love isn’t worth the mess.
…Until it is.
Along with their meddling mutual friends, Possibly The Worst Ex In The World, and a totally bangin’ soundtrack, Stevie and Milo hit every major identity crisis (sexual, spiritual, existential, you get it) on their way to finding each other—and themselves.
(And if they happen to also find the best title of an adult film while they’re at it? That’s just the rainbow sprinkles on top.)
𝙄𝙣𝙨𝙥𝙞𝙧𝙚𝙙 𝙗𝙮 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙖𝙪𝙩𝙝𝙤𝙧’𝙨 𝙩𝙞𝙢𝙚 𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙠𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙖𝙩 𝙖𝙣 𝙖𝙙𝙪𝙡𝙩 𝙗𝙤𝙪𝙩𝙞𝙦𝙪𝙚, 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙨𝙡𝙞𝙘𝙚-𝙤𝙛-𝙡𝙞𝙛𝙚 𝙧𝙤𝙢𝙖𝙣𝙩𝙞𝙘 𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙙𝙮 𝙘𝙤𝙣𝙩𝙖𝙞𝙣𝙨 𝙚𝙭𝙥𝙡𝙞𝙘𝙞𝙩 𝙡𝙖𝙣𝙜𝙪𝙖𝙜𝙚, 𝙛𝙧𝙖𝙣𝙠 𝙙𝙞𝙨𝙘𝙪𝙨𝙨𝙞𝙤𝙣 𝙤𝙛 𝙨𝙚𝙭 𝙩𝙤𝙮 𝙢𝙖𝙞𝙣𝙩𝙚𝙣𝙖𝙣𝙘𝙚/𝙤𝙥𝙚𝙧𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙨𝙞𝙢𝙞𝙡𝙖𝙧 𝙩𝙤𝙥𝙞𝙘𝙨, 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙤𝙣𝙡𝙮 𝙨𝙡𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩𝙡𝙮 𝙛𝙞𝙘𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙖𝙡𝙞𝙯𝙚𝙙 𝙘𝙪𝙨𝙩𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙧 𝙨𝙩𝙤𝙧𝙞𝙚𝙨—𝙗𝙚𝙘𝙖𝙪𝙨𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙮 𝙘𝙖𝙣’𝙩 𝙢𝙖𝙠𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙨𝙩𝙪𝙛𝙛 𝙪𝙥.
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the---hermit · 2 years
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Zeus Grants Stupid Wished by Cory O'Brien
I first read this book in the summer of 2020, I think? I am not sure at all, but I think I never spoke about this on here, which is funny since I found out about this book on tumblr. I cannot find the post that recommended it, but I clearly remember someone describing it as "Deadpool retelling myths" and it is the best description of this book I have found so far. It is just that, the type of humor and way of talking of Deadpool retelling world mythology. It is an hilarious read, I loved it the first time I read it, and loved it even more this time. I did not think I would laugh again as much as I did. This tiny book touches many mythologies, from Greek, to Mesopotamian, Indian, Japanese, Native American, African, Judeo-Christian, and more. If you like the type of humor I can only describe as Deadpool-like, so a bit vulger but stupidly funny, check O'Brien's writing, he has a website with some of these stories, and it's really funny. It was exactly the type of lighthearted and funny read I needed at the moment.
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read-alert · 27 days
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Another crosspost from my Instagram! This one for April Fool's
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Moist Von Lipwig series: Going Postal, Making Money, and Raising Steam by Terry Pratchett
Tiffany Aching series: The Wee Free Men, A Hat Full of Sky, Wintersmith, I Shall Wear Midnight, and The Shepherd's Crown by Terry Pratchett
Several People Are Typing by Calvin Kasulke
Trans Wizard Harriet Porber series: Trans Wizard Harriet Porber and the Bad Boy Parasaurolophus and Trans Wizard Harriet Porber and the Theater of Love by Chuck Tingle
LitenVerse Series: Finna and Defekt by Nino Cipri
The Great Gatsby But Nick Has Scoliosis by Dick Cody Heese
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rotten-whispers · 1 year
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Ferrets have mechanical attachments, people have tails, and bones are no longer purely internal! (Zany sci-fi novel)
=> Tales from a Mall
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