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transvampireboyfriend · 1 year

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Had this “Steve only hates impersonal nicknames” idea in my notes for a while and then after seeing @cholvoq ‘s wonderful art I had to turn it into a real thing for Valentine’s Day. This is 2.4k, i’m SO sorry edit: you can now read this on ao3 :)

Eddie’s a nickname guy. It’s always Dusty this and Gare-Bear that and JeffJeff here and Bobbie there and it’s Mikey and Maxxii and Nance-pants and Johnny and… big boy?

Him being a nickname guy makes it near impossible to hide his crushes. Thankfully, Steve had been really cool about it. Sure, he seemed a little stunned, but Eddie still had all his teeth in place by the end of that interaction, so he had called that a win.

He hadn’t known then that Steve was… different. Or he was starting to see it but what he thought was shocking then had really been just the tip of the iceberg. He hadn’t expected Steve to be nice. Or funny, or caring, or protective, or understanding.

He had learned all of that after everything. During chats on Hellfire nights while the kids cleaned up after themselves, during hangouts at the diner with Robin and Nancy, during Saturday afternoons when he went to pick out a movie only to end up talking with Steve, their conversation flowing until it was cut short by Steve’s shift ending.

After some time, Eddie had gotten to know Steve even more during long weekday nights when one came over to bring the other something they left behind, or to share a record, or to demand the beers the other owes or to show the other a stupid article in a stupid magazine only to end up making dinner together and watching a movie afterwards.

They stopped making excuses about two weeks ago.

Eddie had asked “do youuu… wanna come over?” on Saturday night, while nervously twirling his keys as Steve locked the front doors of the Family Video.

The evening chill had cut right through Eddie’s leather jacket as his keys clanged against his rings. But Steve had nodded with a smile and asked “pizza?” on their way to their cars, and Eddie had forgotten all about the cold.

Point being, Steve had been just fine with ‘big boy’ when it happened. Eddie’s a nickname guy. Him and Steve are hanging out more now, and so, Eddie’s been calling him more nicknames. Some of them are very intentional, others come completely without thinking, and it turns out, Steve takes issue with a few of them.

The first time it happens, Eddie’s underneath his van trying to get the damn thing to cooperate, the recent winter was tough on it, and it keeps dying out on him.

Steve sits nearby perched on a little stool, wearing his Family Video vest since he came by right after finishing his morning shift to see if they could make plans for lunch. Eddie suggested they grab something at the diner if and when he finally gets the van to start back up and Steve had agreed to wait.

He’s been telling Eddie about tonight’s basketball- game? match? super bowl? Is there such a thing as the major leagues of basketball? Eddie’s not sure, but he adores the sound of Steve’s voice and he’s kind of invested in the drama of players switching teams and retiring and whatever else Steve wants to tell him about. So, he’s been listening, not really bothering with asking for clarification for what he doesn’t understand yet. He’ll figure it out as they go.

He's blindly patting the floor around his legs for his rag, when he feels Steve put it right in his hand.

Eddie’s relieved. "Thanks, bud!" he says, the nickname just rolling off his tongue effortlessly, no meaning attached.

It gets kind of quiet all of a sudden. After about five seconds of Steve not talking, Eddie comes out to check on him, and finds him frowning at his legs.

"Don't call me ‘bud’" Steve requests, looking up at his face, his tone just a tad harsh. Eddie would think he ran into King Steve if he didn't know any better.

As it is, Eddie gets Steve probably thinks the nickname is childish or patronizing, so he doesn’t think twice of it, just gets a little sheepish and says "sorry, Stevie".

Steve smiles at that, a little cocky. He does his little mean girl shaking his head thing like he just got exactly what he wanted. Eddie feels his face twist a bit in confusion, but he likes it when Steve gets a little mean so he doesn't say anything about it and just dives back under his van as Steve resumes their conversation.

The second time it happens, they’re outside the supermarket. The kids shot out of the van as soon as it rolled to a stop, Steve calling out a warning after them while still listening to Eddie explain why Star Wars and Star Trek are actually very different but really good in their own way. Their conversation carries on as they hop out of the van, lock up and walk to meet at the front.

“I’m telling you, Star Trek is great. You would love it,” Eddie says, “you just have to give it a chance”.

Steve rolls his eyes at him, but Eddie can see his smile.

“Ok, alright,” Steve answers, “you can show me tonight then”, it’s almost too nonchalant. Eddie has to hide his grin.

Steve’s been suggesting they hang out more and more lately, and he can’t help but feel a bit hopeful. They clearly enjoy each other’s company, their time together is never dull, Steve seems to be really comfortable around him and maybe, just maybe…

“Should we get beers then?” Eddie asks, excited at the prospect of some more time alone with him. They haven’t had a weeknight hangout since Eddie fixed his van last week. He kinda misses the very specific color of Steve’s eyes in the Harringtons’ yellow living room lamplight.

“Yeah,” Steve says, his eyes get soft in a way Eddie only started noticing a couple of weeks back, “we can watch it at my place” he adds. Eddie thinks he definitely hasn’t seen him look at anyone else like that.

To shake himself out of the spell of the prettiest boy he’s ever met making the prettiest eyes he’s ever seen at him and ONLY him, Eddie grabs Steve by the wrist and starts marching them towards the supermarket’s front doors.

Without thinking, Eddie says "c'mon man," as they go.

Steve, who started easily following him (like he always does these days), suddenly stops in his tracks. Eddie gets pulled back and almost stumbles on top of Steve. He'd get flustered if Steve wasn't frowning at him like he’d just said the most insulting thing he’d heard this month.

"Don't call me ‘man’" Steve says. Eddie feels his eyebrows raise a bit.

He debates asking why but doesn't question Steve in the end. He’d rather offer understanding than judgement to him any day.

So, Eddie takes advantage of Steve's wrist in his hand, and squeezes there a bit, says "I'm sorry sweetheart" sincerely, looks into Steve's eyes so he can see Eddie means it.

Steve blushes a bit then, not really used to the nickname yet, Eddie just got the balls to start using it last week. Eddie himself is not really used to seeing Steve blush, and at something he says? It’s too much power for one metalhead.

But he gets distracted from Steve’s blush because it happens again, Steve basically preens like a peacock once Eddie switches nicknames. Looks smug, like he has Eddie wrapped around his finger and well, Eddie guesses he does, so, no arguments there either.

He just smiles back at Steve, really, has no other choice, it’s not like he can control how he reacts to the most gorgeous fucking face the universe could ever come up with. But he tugs him along again, Steve happily following this time.

The next time it happens, Steve’s leaning against his kitchen island, with Eddie leaning across from him against the counter.

The party is watching a movie in the Harringtons’ living room and at some point, Eddie got up to get himself another soda, Steve not so subtly followed after him, taking the empty popcorn bowls to the sink. He struck up a conversation and there they stayed.

Eddie’s been turning the small gesture around and around in his head. Clearly Steve’s not shy about seeking him out, and he’s obviously good with the party knowing, which means a hell of a lot because those are Steve’s people, that’s his family.

Eddie’s honestly running out of excuses to not ask him out. Seeing him reaching out to bump his sneaker against Eddie’s boot when he says something funny, laughing just a little too hard at Eddie’s dumb joke; seeing his eyes widen a bit when Eddie compliments him; seeing him notice when Eddie is holding back from talking too much, and not letting it go until he thinks Eddie’s shared all of his opinions on the subject; Eddie thinks maybe he can be brave, when it comes to Steve.

And this week might be the perfect time.

Here they are still, the movie long ended and several easy conversations floating from the living room to the kitchen, where they’re still engrossed on their own.

“I mean I taught the kid how to do his hair for god’s sake!” Steve is saying, Eddie’s laughing easily, and he has a slight suspicion Steve’s acting way more annoyed than he really is because he knows Eddie dies laughing every time Steve roasts the kids.

“Just, if he’s gonna give me hair advice, he should work on that goddamn tone. At the Very Least.” Steve finishes, Eddie giggling all the while at his Annoyed Mom tone.

"Yeah, dude!" Eddie agrees, wanting to egg him on, but Steve's face suddenly falls and whatever remark Eddie had locked and loaded just fades away.

Eddie blinks perplexed; he’s getting déjà vu.

Steve frowns at him, says "Don't call me ‘dude’".

It’s eerie, only he sounds a bit annoyed this time.

Eddie thinks, maybe someone called Steve ‘dude’ before in an unpleasant way, so he doesn't pry. Instead, he takes the chance to call him a nickname he likes more, and says "Sorry, pretty boy", his heart fluttering in the milliseconds he has to wait for Steve’s reaction.

And it happens one last time: Steve absolutely beams at that one, his smile so bright it makes Eddie want to jump in place.

He leans further back on the counter returning the smile, not noticing the common thread in Steve’s reactions to him switching nicknames.

But then the glint in Steve’s eyes suddenly brightens a dim corner of Eddie’s brain. He gets this feeling that reminds him of a perfectly set up riddle or finding that one perfect note for his latest song. It’s like everything suddenly just makes sense.

Eddie feels realization dawn on his face as he pushes himself off the counter to walk right into Steve’s personal bubble, grabs both of Steve's hands.

"Steve" Eddie says, not even caring that he sounds like the name is dripping in honey when it comes out of his mouth. With how sweet Steve is, it might as well be.

Steve just looks at him a little stunned, but doesn't say anything. Eddie draws circles in the back of his palms to reassure him.

"Why don't you want me to call you ‘dude’?" Eddie asks, trying to find out if this whole thing is what he thinks it is.

Steve looks down at their joined hands,.

"You call Nancy that sometimes..." Steve mumbles.

His answer would sound inconsequential to the unsuspecting, certainly would have to Eddie as late as last week, but Eddie thinks he’s finally getting it, and he hums his understanding.

"How ‘bout ‘man’?" he asks

Steve replies "You call Robin that sometimes..." his eyes still on their hands.

Eddie nods his agreement.

"I call everyone those things" he points out.

Steve agrees. "Exactly" he says, finally looking at him again, sounding annoyed and confirming Eddie’s suspicions.

Eddie feels his face split into a smile. He wants to grab Steve’s beautiful freaking face and just plant one on him.

"Can I still call you sweetheart?" he ventures instead. The nickname brings the hint of a smile to Steve's face but then he seems to realize something not so pleasant.

"Do you call someone else ‘sweetheart’?" Steve asks in return.

"No one" Eddie says, shaking his head, his tone vehement.

"Then yes" Steve finally answers. Eddie's heart wants to beat right out of his chest.

He interlocks their fingers to ground himself, Steve looks down at their hands and smiles at the sight.

"So, you don't want me to call you something I call someone else?" Eddie states, more than asks, calling Steve’s eyes back to his again.

"Anyone else" Steve confirms, holding his gaze.

Eddie lets out a small shuddering exhale and feels his heart fluttering in his throat, he really cannot believe this boy.

"Steve" Eddie drawls, dripping in honey again, his hands coming up to cradle Steve's face because he really can't resist anymore "Sweetheart" he says.

Steve's eyes grow a little wide and he starts blushing so much that Eddie can feel it in his palms.

"Steevieeee" Eddie sinsongs, squeezing Steve's face a bit "Pretty boy" Eddie calls him. Steve just keeps looking at him and a small smile blooms in his pretty, pretty face.

"Would you let me take you out to dinner this Friday?" Eddie finally asks him, his fingers curling to the back of Steve's head to play with his hair there. Steve's eyes get even wider.

" 's Valentine's this Friday" he points out. Eddie knows.

"Mmhm. Want you to be my Valentine." Eddie tells him, tugs his hair gently, "How's that sound?" he asks, bold in a way he never has been before. Steve blushing does things to him.

"Sounds nice" Steve answers. He smiles and nods while his hands hook on Eddie's belt loops.

"Then it's a date?" Eddie asks, trying not to sound too eager. He thinks he fails spectacularly but Steve beams and pulls him in to kiss his cheek.

"It's a date" Steve tells him, his breath ghosting on Eddie's cheek and making him shiver.

Steve pulls back, lets go of Eddie’s belt loops and tugs on a strand of his hair gently, smiling like the cat that got the cream as he walks back out into the living room.

Eddie’s gonna make this the best Valentine’s Day date Steve has ever been on.

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thefatedthoughtofyou · 1 year

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Steve's not obsessed with Eddie's hands.

He's not.

They're just... he happened to notice them, once, when Eddie was listening to Dustin talk through how he might want to make his first DM campaign play out.

Steve wasn't even really paying attention at first, just reading some comic he'd found lying in Eddie's room. But then, out of the corner of his eye, he'd seen it. Movement.

Eddie and Dustin were sitting at the small kitchen table, Dustin talking about puzzles and traps and monsters and Eddie was smiling, nodding encouragingly, looking more and more exicted. But it wasn't the movement of his head that drew Steve's attention.

It was his hands.

They were resting on the sides of his legs, tapping.

Steve could only see one hand really, but he could see Eddie's other arm jumping the same way, his hands moving faster and faster the more excited he got, until they were just hovering near his legs, flapping in the air beside him as he smiled widely at Dustin. He suggested a few things, to Dustin, Steve's pretty sure that's what he was saying anyway, his ears weren't great anymore if he wasn't focused, and right now, all of his focus was on Eddie's hands.

Dustin slapped his hand on the table, pointed at Eddie and then started scribbling as Eddie laughed, Steve always managed to hear Eddie's laugh, his hands flapping harder, slapping at his thighs.

Steve vaguely hears his name, cocks his head to the side, but doesn't respond, his eyes still locked on Eddie's flapping hands, and then they stop moving. Both of them freezing, the one Steve can see clamps down on Eddie's thigh, fingers pressing into his jeans.

Steve blinks. Tears his eyes away. Looks at Eddie.

He's staring at Steve, his cheeks tinted pink. Steve swallows, gives him a little smile before Dustin has his attention, chatting at him about what he and Eddie had just come up with.

Steve hears about half of it. Nodding when he thinks he should, trying his best to sound interested. It's enough for Dustin. The barely there commitment. And usually Steve is better at engaging with him, even though he has no clue what he's talking about.

But he's distracted. His eyes keep wandering to Eddie's hands. But they don't move again the whole time he's there, Eddie's knuckles turn white as Steve's eyes linger on his hand. His fingers still pressing into his thigh, they drum a quick beat here and there, but his hands don't move.

Steve sighs, drags his eyes away, and tries to keep them off Eddie. Somehow feeling like Eddie is embarrassed, or upset, that Steve had seen... whatever it was he'd seen.

~°~

It keeps happening.

Eddie's flapping hands.

Steve's eyes on them.

But he's careful now. He doesn't stare. Just steals glances when the movements draw his eye. And Eddie always has his hands under tables, or tucked close to his sides, when it happens. Like he's trying to hide it.

Steve doesn't understand why. He likes it. Every time he sees Eddie's hands moving excitedly it makes his chest flutter. Like he's so happy that Eddie's happy it just fills him with warmth.

But it happens other times too.

Not only when he's happy.

It happens when he's nervous.

Happens when he's scared.

The movements are more erratic when he's nervous or scared. His hands flap, shake, clench, and unclench at his sides.

Every time, Steve wants to reach out and touch. To take his hands, hold them in his and tell him he's okay. That whatever it is. Steve will help.

But he hides it. Behind distracting smiles, and under tables, and behind his back, sometimes. But Steve sees him, watches him, and he wants.

Wants to ask. Wants to touch. Wants to be touched.

Wants to feel Eddie's shaking, flapping, hands against him. Wants to be the reason they flap happily at his sides sometimes. Wants to feel them flap happily against his sides. Wonders if Eddie would do that against his back if he kissed him.

Or if he'd do it lying underneath Steve, clutching at his shirt before his hands just taptaptaptapped against his back as Steve pressed him into his matress.

Or maybe he'd hold Eddie's hands, up above his head. Feel his fingers tapping against his hands as Steve kissed him, nice and slow. Eddie would just tap faster, if he was happy, if he wanted that, with Steve.

Steve sighed, deeply, and glanced at Eddie's hands, his left one resting in his lap, thumb twisting at his ring. His right one, hanging down by his leg, shaking happily as he listened to Will and Dustin make plans for their new campaign, and wished he could reach out and touch him. Even just settle his hand against Eddie's, just to feel the joy shake out of his body.

~°~

The first time Steve reaches out and takes Eddie's shaking hand, is at the summer carnival.

It's hot. And crowded. And loud. And they're waiting in line for some ride the kids want to drag them on. People laughing and screaming and crowding around, jostling them and bumping their shoulders.

And Eddie had gone quiet about five minutes ago. Steve keeps glancing down, watching his hands. It takes three more minutes. But they start to shake, flapping at his sides before he grabs at his jeans, wipes his palms, lets them shake again.

Steve leans forward, tells Dustin they'll be over by the benches, and he grabs Eddie's hand, gently slides his hand into Eddie's. Eddie looks at him, blinking rapidly.

"You wanna come with me? Get outta here?" Steve asks, jerks his head to the side. Eddie nods immediately, his fingers clamping down on Steve's hand, hard. But Steve doesn't care, because Eddie's hand shakes, just once or twice, and then it stops. And his hand is warm, and strong, inside Steve's as he leads them to the benches and sits Eddie down.

He gives him a drink of his lemon shake up, snorts when Eddie makes a face at the sour taste, and then sits next to him.

Eddie takes a few deep breaths, his eyes closed. He takes his hand out of Steve's, leaving him aching for his touch. Steve just lets him go, rests his hand in his lap instead.

"Thanks." Eddie sighs, after a long moment, his eyes finally opening, they don't land on Steve. Stay locked on his lap.

"Anytime." He says, and he means it. Deep in his chest he means it, he'd do anything for Eddie. Always. Eddie smiles, finally looking at him.

"Can't believe you tried to kill me with that though." Eddie huffs, kicks Steve's shoe with his own and nods at the cup sitting between them.

Steve laughs, watches Eddie smile, his fingers twitching in his lap, his wrist twitches once, Steve's pretty sure it counts.

~°~

The second time he touches Eddie's hands, Eddie's just made them grilled cheese, his signature dish. And he's stitting in front of Steve, his chin resting in one hand, his other hand hidden under the table. He's watching as Steve chews his first bite.

"Weeeell?" He asks, impatient, as always. Steve makes a show of chewing slower, his eyes lifting to the ceiling as he hums, thinking. Eddie kicks at his shin under the table, his socked foot not hurting at all. Steve snorts, kicks back, and says,

"It's good. Really good. Best grilled cheese I ever had." He's serious, knows he sounds like he's teasing.

"Yeah? You like it? I didn't burn it? I mean I know you said you like them crispy but I thought maybe I got it too dark. Might have burnt it." Eddie rambles, and Steve just smiles, shakes his head.

"It's perfect, actually. You're a grilled cheese wizard. Or a... grilled cheese... bard. No I don't think that's a thing. Wizard applies more here, pretty sure." Steve says, waving off his own words like they're nonsense, looking toward the ceiling again to avoid Eddie's, no doubt, exasperated look.

But that's when he sees it.

His eyes are on their way to the ceiling when he sees Eddie's hand, flapping next to his thigh. Steve looks back to him, sees him beaming, and can't help himself when he reaches out and grabs Eddie's shaking hand.

But it's a mistake. He didn't know it would be. Didn't think. Had forgotten about that first day when Eddie had caught him staring and froze.

The smile drops off Eddie's face and he tugs his hand quickly away from Steve, hiding it in his lap, scooting back in his chair, away from Steve, his eyes on the table.

"Sorry. I can't- sorry." He stammers, shaking his head, his cheeks are red, his eyes darting around the table top as he curls in on himself, arms wrapped around his stomach protectively.

"What are you sorry for? You don't have to be sorry." Steve says, his voice soft, just a breath between them really. Eddie frowns, shakes his head again.

"No. It's annoying. I know it is. It just happens. I can't help it." Eddie's voice is firm, his words sound rehearsed, like he's said them a thousand times. It makes Steve's chest ache, with pain for Eddie, and with anger for whoever told him that any part of himself was annoying. Especially this part, a part of him that Steve is sure is pure joy, made visible, made tangible and expressive.

"It's not annoying." Steve says, and he sounds... mad? A little. But not at Eddie. Eddie's eyes snap up, lock on Steve's face, he doesn't blink.

"It's not." Steve reaffirms, one shake of his head. He moves his hand, slides it across the table top slowly, towards Eddie, and then turns it, palm up, waiting.

Eddie's eyes twitch from his face to his hand and back again. Steve smiles, small, and wiggles his fingers, gives Eddie a nod.

"C'mon. It's okay." He nods his head again, eyes dropping to his hand and then back to Eddie's face. Eddie swallows, sits a little straighter, unwraps his arms from his stomach. Steve sees his arms flex, knows Eddie is squeezing his thigh under the table, nervous. But then he moves, slowly brings his hand up, and places it in Steve's.

He sighs, the contact he's been waiting for finally made, Eddie's breathing is shakey as he watches Steve curl his fingers around his hand, pull it closer across the table.

"It's not annoying Eddie it's-" Steve pauses. Eddie frowns, a grimace really.

"Hey. No. I mean it. I like it." Steve says, and Eddie looks at him, his eyes moving back to their tangled hands over and over.

"You do?" He asks, and he sounds so fucking small. So unsure. So Steve does the only thing he can think of, he stands, drags Eddie to his feet as well, and then presses a kiss to Eddie's knuckles.

"I do. I really do. That's why I was staring." Steve says, breathes it against Eddie's hand, smiles when Eddie's fingers twitch against him.

"I'm sorry it made you uncomfortable. But it wasn't because I was annoyed. I promise you that. You believe me?" Steve ducks his head a little, tries to get Eddie to look at him, he's got his free hand up by his mouth, his nail worrying between his teeth. And Steve has to smile, can see Eddie thinking, trying to make sure he does, believe Steve. One moment more and Eddie nods, presses his lips together, and looks at Steve.

"I believe you." He says, teeth worrying into his lip.

"Good. So you- I mean you don't have to hide it. Around me. If you don't want. Cuz I meant what I said. I like it. A lot." Steve feels heat rush into his cheeks and closes his eyes, breathes against Eddie's knuckles for a moment before he looks back up to see Eddie smiling at him. Looking a little in awe. A little breathless.

"You like it that much?" His nose scrunches and Steve just want to fucking kiss him. He nods instead.

"Yeah. I really do. It's like you've got... I don't know... happy little bat wings. Just flapping around you when you're having a good time. I love it. I love-" Steve stops, the words caught in his throat, because that's too much. Maybe. For right now. But he feels it. Has felt it for Eddie for awhile now, the warmth of it humming beneath his skin when Eddie's near him.

Eddie's beaming at him now, tears shining in his eyes, he hides behind his hair, for just a second, before he darts forward, presses his lips to Steve's, a quick press, and then he's gone again, and the space between them is small but still too much.

"Sorry. I've never done that before." Eddie breathes. Steve watches something that could be fear, or regret, pass over Eddie's features like a shadow, and refuses to let it stay there, not even a second longer.

He drops Eddie's hand and cradles Eddie's neck, draws him closer, til their sharing breath.

"Stop apologizing. I want this. You." Steve whispers, pressing his forehead to Eddie's.

"I want you t-"

And Steve kissing him. Slow. Sweet. His hands holding Eddie close. Steve moves his tongue along Eddie's bottom lip, smiles into Eddie's mouth when he gasps, and then deepens the kiss, just so, tilting Eddie's head a little for a better angle. Eddie moans into his mouth, his hands scrambling to grab at Steve's back, clenching in his shirt and unclenching as Steve tilts his world on it's axis.

And then Steve feels it, Eddie's hands, tapping against his back, like he'd thought about since that first day, like he'd dreamed about, on several occasions. Too many to count.

Steve hums into Eddie's mouth, smiles against his lips, their teeth clicking together as Eddie smiles too, laughs into Steve's mouth, his breath filling Steve's lungs as they cling to each other.

See, Steve's not obsessed with Eddie's hands.

He just knew they'd feel perfect tapping out happy rhythms against his skin.

And for once, in his traumatic, full of bullshit life, Steve was right.

He's not obsessed with Eddie's hands.

But he does love them.

The way they move, and shake, and show all of Eddie's joys, wild, and uncontrolled.

And his to hold.

#steddie #steddie ficlet #steddie blurb #i just really needed to write something soft and sweet and this wouldn't leave my head #living vicariously through these boys #inexperienced eddie #autistic eddie munson #he's a happy flapper!!!#fates endless inkwell #fei #mine #my writing #my fic #steve x eddie #steve harrington x eddie munson #this is.... so close to my heart #i just want someone to want me ya know???? to see all the weird shit i do and be like ... fuck. that one. thats the one.

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lunarharp · 3 months

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What led to this (orufrey comic, cw an uncomfortable/creepy scene)

#witch hat tag #orufrey #er.... i'm too tired to have anything to say..i worked several days on this.#wait.. didn't i say just recently here that i probably wouldn't ever depict 'what if alaira is qifrey's sort-of ex'. What's going on #i don't even remember deciding to draw this..it's all a blur..i'm not sure why i WOULD decide to draw delicate scenes in my head #that i wouldn't really want to share with anyone/discuss so why did i draw it...#some part of me really really wants to draw things that are more and more true to myself...#maybe because of my alienation with most romance/shipping/dynamics the rest of the world depicts.#orufrey really is perfectly suited to me - what i read in the text and what is in my head. well anyway #i am TIRED of drawing poses and angles and..maybe now i will actually take a break from drawing bc of the tediousness of Angles #btw it really is a 'stretch of time' . . . assuming witches graduate age 18-20 #well orufrey are canonically 30-ish. they've only had agott around for presumably about TWO years (?) bc she took the test age 10 #and it feels like oru moving in/unknown atelier acquisition/building (?) .. i guess that could be a year or so before agott at most #(she was the first disciple) so... ????????? What about the other 7 or so years ?!?!?!!?!?! Unemployed Brimhat Hatred era #that time is very nebulous. after qifrey went to the tower i feel like it's been implied he and oru drifted apart a little.#certainly they didn't live together at first... no way. that doesn't feel like how it is based on things oru has said about becoming Eye #idk. I'm tired now. i don't usually think of alaira as necessarily qifrey's ex and this being how things went in that 'sliver of time'.#i usually prefer the idea that they have their first kiss with each other in their 30s cause That's Just The Orufrey Lifestyle #just felt like making a more relatable alternative view of my own Cai Orufrey Canon one time. btw im a big monoshipper and it hurt a bit #let's leave it there. this is surely the most i've worked on a 'single' art - though now i realise just how much longer the fic took :')

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djappleblush · 1 year

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"This fic is not abandoned," "Next chapter coming right up!" "Apologies for the cliffhanger; the wait will be worth it,"

advertised the fanfic author whose work was written in the 1500s.

#do you know the kind of pain I live in everyday #knowing the amazing fic I've been reading was never finished #left to rot in the pages of my browser #leaving me bereft and unsatisfied and unhappy to my bones #oh wait fvck sorry #the author was actually me lmao #fanfic #writer problems #cang lan jue #love between fairy and devil #dramione #zutara #haruno sakura #naruto

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onlydrawnbad · 6 months

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Do you ever read 570,000+ word, 130+ chapter fanfics that were started nearly 8 years ago and have current year updates, and as you get to the end of certain chapters along the way, you keep going "wow, I would have hated to be here in 201x and have to wait for THAT cliffhanger, those poor readers, those sad, desperate historical souls" and you're just so glad for yourself because you know you don't have to stop until chapter 139, and you arrogantly assume that's probably just extended epilogues or something (because you were previously conditioned by another fic to believe that), so everything will be fine?

Only to get to chapter 139 and SCREAM OUT LOUD because you jinxed yourself right into THE NEWEST WAVE OF CLIMATIC PLOT CHAPTERS WHERE ALL THE SHIT IS GOING DOWN and now you, too, have become the reader you felt such pity for?

Wait, you don't?

THEN GO OVER THERE AND DO WHAT I DID SO I DON'T HAVE TO BE ALONE IN MY HUBRIS. It comes with art. So. Much. Wonderful. Comic. Art.

I would like to stress (as I have done before) that I have never played this game. Not once. I had never even heard of it originally. Yet this is now the second absolutely massive Sans x reader/OC fic I have read in this fandom. Everything I know about Undertale, I learned because one day on a whim I decided to read a 480,000+ word, 170+ chapter fanfic because I liked the way @tricktster used words on some tumblr post (don't ask me which one, I've forgotten). I have re-read that fic at least once a year, if not more, for multiple years in a row because it's like a favorite book to me now.

If anyone needs me, I'll be comfort-reading it, again.

And then probably going back and re-reading JoAT, because oh my god that fic. I'm just so in love with it for a million reasons.

(Yes, it took me this long to see there was another glorious treasure in plain sight under @capnhanbers despite following @mod2amaryllis and it's just really embarrassing to be confronted by that kind of obliviousness, okay? Can I blame it on how, multiple times now over the years, I've gone months and months without looking at this app unless it notified me of something specific?)

I swear, I have never read fic in any other fandom where it was this easy to immerse myself in it with nothing more than some light googling along the way (the first time with CoBC), and the googling was just because I'm me and I like to know all the things. In both cases, you don't have to come to the table with anything other than an interest in supernatural-elements stories (monsters, magic, etc) and a love for snappy dialogue and funny (dad) jokes and HEART-WRENCHING FEELS and watching the author having a life journey in the notes.

(And yes, sure, an open mind about a skeleton monster and a human having magical sex, but if you know you're in a rated fic about monsters and humans, you must know that's going to be a thing.)

#undertale #fanwork #jack of all trades #joat #chill or be chilled #cobc #sans x reader #sans x oc #me: leaving reviews on ao3 gives me anxiety because i don't want to sound stupid #also me: just wrote this long ass post with actual people tagged in it #i'm aware it may seem odd to love things that include dicks made of magic #but i think at this point in my life i'm more than fine with that being my odd #BESIDES YOU JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND #THESE FICS ARE SO FUCKING GOOD OKAY #I LAUGH I CRY I SCREAM I LIVE I DIE I COME BACK OVER AND OVER #i would legit pay actual money for these two fics as bound books #like actual sexy sexy hardbacks to put on display in my home #what? these? these are my magical monsterfucker books and i love them like classics please admire the holographic foil #blue holo foil for cobc #gold holo foil for joat #why am i rambling in the tags like this?

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omaano · 1 year

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…. Just so we all know this is the stage from where I need to pull my little clone portraits together

#Wip #my art #and then I will merge my sketch and paint layers together and the messing around starts for real #but FIRST I need to figure out my colours for good #haven’t struggled with them so much in a very very long time I feel like #shadows and mid tones and secondary light source and all that aaaah #I need to switch my brain off a little between commissions #I swore I was normal about that Tem gifset didn’t I?#then I stumbled into a fic where Rex picks up the horrible habit of smoking while on leave and here I am #I know I messed up something in my sketch that I will suffer to try and fix later but even when I flip it it doesn’t look TOO bad #he looks FINE in the reference window #which I will take at this point #the sketch took me as long as the other portraits from first line to colour adjustments lol #purple is giving me hell…. it’s time I run away and live out the rest of my life as a hermit away from civilization I suppose

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johnslittlespoon · 1 month

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dog-coded Bucky has ruined me and my poor little brain, you’ve caused it to rot and this is the only thing i have been thinking of for days!!

i saw your post about the different tropes and have a few ideas you might like:

• fear of the vets — i’d imagine that Bucky avoids going to medical at all costs and it would take either Buck or Curt dragging him in for him to actually get medical attention, he’s not happy about it though

• rumbling / playful growling — looks aggressive but it’s completely playful, a lot of the guys could a bit hesitant when he gets like that but quickly realise Bucky is just messing around

• leaning on someone with his full bodyweight — my dog does this all the time and i could imagine Bucky just letting all his weight fall on whoever’s closest; maybe the rest of the 100th learn to always have your feet planted after too one too many falls

• chasing his tail — i think that Bucky tries to live life to the fullest and often that means overindulging in certain vices, but the chasing tail metaphor is more like participating in the simple joys, doing something stupid just because you can

• trigger words — instead of treat or walk, as soon as someone even whispers the word bet Bucky is bounding over

• no social awareness — it’s so clear that Bucky is a social creature, but i feel like he would just go up to anyone and act as if they’re old friends, arms thrown over shoulders and wide smiles; does it make Buck jealous… 👀

• instinct — sort of following on from the above, there are some people that Bucky just avoids as he’s got a bad feeling, you know how some say that dogs always know what type of person someone is

i definitely have more ideas floating around, but these are the main ones at the moment. i loved the first chapter and got so excited when i saw it posted!!

RESPECTFULLY I SMOOCH YOUR FOREHEAD. WOWOWWWWW

the way the live wires in my brain lit tf up at these oh you're a saint. i am SO sorry for the transferred brainrot but omg THANK YOU FOR TAKING THE TIME TO WRITE THIS OUT?! i'm nearly in tears at some of them i am so soft for him someone needs to come put me out of my misery pretty please

saving all of these and absolutely trying to squeeze some in <3 esp the no social awareness one bc i do have a little jealous buck scene planned out for chapter three teehee

thank u again legend i am about to post a little snippet as an offering of gratitude SDGJKDSK <3

#and thank u to everyone else leaving asks ab this fic/au truly #the shared enthusiasm fuels me it's like crack to my braincells #i'm live laugh loving thru the suffering of actually having to force myself to sit down and write LMAO #dog coded bucky fic #johnslittlespoon asks

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sysig · 8 months

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Wouldn’t want him getting lost now, would we (Patreon)

#Doodles #SCII #ZEX #The Captain #DAX #Me quietly while watching Muppet Treasure Island: Don't | My brain: Haha anyway- ♪#I don't even have to reread! My brain just does this nonsense! It's still Right There at the forefront of my mind #At this rate I'll have to go pick up Treasure Island from the library *shakes fist* Stevensonnnnnnnnnnn #I will admit that the itch to reread has been growing but mmmmn I've got fics to vet for printing! And that one's technically unfinished!#I mean I might break soon lol but mmmmnnnnn!#Same thing when I was in a Treasure Planet mood years(?! how has it been that long and I still haven't rewatched!) ago #Anyway yes these were inspired by rewatching Muppet Treasure Island lol - it's just one interpretation after the other!#If you happen to go seeking out Professional Pirate you might recognize the second shot as when Jim has been kidnapped by the pirates #I kinda just interpolated from there lol #Same vibe as the set I made a while ago of ZEX piercing the Captain - there's just Something So about ZEX leaving a mark on him!#Not directly altering him (at least more than skin-deep haha) but decorating him! Dressing him up! There's Something about that #Like a living museum - how much does ZEX project onto the Captain? There's a lot of weird vibes around them <3 #He wants A Human and he has His Human but hmmm ♪#Well for the time being that's his only human - and seeing as he's collared but without a leash in the last one he's not running away!#It's progress haha #Hhhh drawing the Captain in pirate garb really is one of my favourites <3 I had so much fun the first times around and it's still fun!#His hair is for some reason I cannot explain easier to draw in this setting - there is no explanation I can think of but it is! Why fight it #ZEX is also very fun to draw in pirate gear haha ♫ I really think it's one of his handsomest interpretations #I always think he's pretty! But something about the pirate aesthetic adds to his masculinity? :0 #He's still a swishy pirate hehe ♥ Maybe it's the open chest on his tunic haha I just think he's very handsome!

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dollsome-does-tumblr · 28 days

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this is so dorky but i think writing that really long succession fic last summer/fall fundamentally fixed me

#i've been rereading it (finally felt brave enough!) and oh man! lots of feelings associated w/ this whole experience!#i got so much out of writing this!!#both in terms of helping to process a lot of life stuff AND a lot of fandom feelings stuff #and in terms of: now i weirdly feel like i can write anything (original fic edition; fanfic still scares me) i ever think of ever again #i somehow feel like making it through that fic to the end means now i've got the power #there are a few chapters in this where it's like 'i managed to write this exactly how i imagined it #and it was so hard it was like running a marathon #but eventually I DID IT #and now nothing scares me'#anyway. i love this fic. thanks for improving me so much @ this writing experience!#and thank you to everyone for leaving such incredible comments because i'm still over here rereading them and living for them <3 #dollsome's deep thoughts

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ohworm-writes · 1 year

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◧▥—JSCHLATT HEADCANONS—▥◨

PAIRING None

RATING Parental Guidance Suggested, Some Material May Not Be Suitable for Children (Limited swearing)

SYNOPSIS A random assortment of Jschlatt headcanons, nothing more and certainly nothing less. Be it of his mannerisms, likes and dislikes, preferences and whatever else may be.

WORD COUNT 1.5k

AUTHORS NOTE I’ve been thinking about Schlatt for the past hour or so, give or take, and I’ve come up with a few random headcanons for him. I will admit, a lot of these are self serving, meaning that I made them whilst thinking of the things I do, but I do believe that, at least in my eyes and heart, that these are true and applicable to him. My favorite streamer and person in the whole wide world. <3 Yes, it’s a little different when compared to my typical works, but let me be! I want to do these for more characters, I think, so let me know your guys’ thoughts on this! I hope you enjoy. :)

His hands naturally run a little colder than most. His fingertips feel like ice, almost comparable to the feeling of touching metal after it’s been left out on its own for hours or days on end. However, he doesn’t typically notice it until his hands touch a surface that isn’t icy or cold beyond belief. At that point, he does make an effort to put his hands somewhere warm- maybe sitting on them or putting them at his sides, whichever works quickest and most effectively.

He likes audiobooks more than physical novels. Putting hours of effort into concentrating on words alone is frustrating and boring to him. He needs constant stimulation to be able to fully take in something, so once he’s introduced to the wonderful world of audiobooks, he’s hooked. He’s very picky on who he chooses to listen to though- the voice of the person needs to be engaging, not something dry or monotone or bland, a voice that can keep his attention. Once he finds a good person to listen to, though, he’ll listen to books at every chance he gets- editing, doing a grocery store run, simply relaxing- it’s his way of winding down.

He hates vacuuming with a burning passion. Absolutely loathes it. It’s not as though the task requires much exertion or effort or anything like that, he just hates it for what it is and in its entirety. Sweeping or mopping he’s absolutely fine with, it’s just that vacuuming requires so many unnecessary steps (or so he thinks is true) such as having to first unwind the cord from the thing and then plug it in and then heave it back and forth and back and forth and back and forth across the floor. And by the time he’s reached a steady rhythm the cord is suddenly too short. It infuriates and frustrates him beyond words, and if he can get out of the chore by any means, best believe that is what he’s doing.

He likes calmer animals more as opposed to wildly energetic ones. Yes, whilst he does have Jambo as his companion, a wild little ball of energy on his own, he loves it when he can just lay down with Jambo sleeping next to him. It’s not necessarily that ‘oh, he hates energetic animals and would get rid or steer clear of one if they were energetic’, it’s just that he enjoys more tame environments than high energy ones. That being said, he loves to play rough with animals- for instance, wrestling with big dogs or playing ‘keep away’ with them, or playfully swatting at cats or something of the like. He can only do it in doses, though, because again, he likes tame environments when it comes to animals and pets.

He fucking loves dancing, like- he’s absolutely enamored with the act itself. Mind you, it’s not as though he’s a dancing professional, but the act of just letting the tune of a song determine the way one’s body sways and moves and shimmies is his favorite. He puts on little concerts of his own when he’s alone, turning his headphones on blast, playing some song that fits the mood right and using his phone as a microphone and absolutely rocking it out.

Speaking of dancing and music in general, he really likes to dance to either older and calmer songs (smooth jazz/soul/swing and et cetera) or really high energy music (hip hop/electronic/Hi-NRG and et cetera). It depends on how he’s feeling, obviously, but if he’s particularly energetic or tense or something of the like, he’ll put on some high energy type music and just- rock his absolute heart out. I’m talking silently screaming and shouting the lyrics of a song, doing an elaborate and on-the-spot dance sequence and jumping all over the room to a song. And, on the other hand, he can slow dance to a calm, older song from time to time (think of Nat King Cole or Frankie Valli) and he’ll just jam out softly, sway from side to side or laying out on his bed, limbs sinking into the bed as he softly hums to the tune of the music.

He deals with sensory overload of overstimulation quite often. Sometimes, an environment will just be too loud and he’ll cringe, wrinkle up his nose and either plug his ears with his fingers, cover them with his palms or put in his headphones to mentally ‘get out of there’. It’ll happen at home, too. Sometimes, everything will just feel… bad and wrong. This could include audio, visual, tactile stimulation or anything of the like- if there’s too much of something in an environment, he’ll get overwhelmed. Though, he deals with it very sparsely, as he’ll simply leave the situation or environment if he can and decompress somewhere else.

He absolutely loves to cook and bake. Now, this is not to say he’s the best at cooking, but he is competent when he’s in the kitchen and can cook more than boxed mac and cheese or plain eggs, of which can, at times, be a bit tricky to make. Nonetheless, he really enjoys cooking and making something new, so if he sees a recipe that looks interesting online or from someone else, he’ll put 110% effort into making it to the best of his abilities. He excels in baking, though, always very adamant about trying some random recipe as soon as he can because it either looks good or looks interesting. Granted, he’s burnt a lot of food or overcooked/undercooked a few dishes in his life, but that doesn’t deter him.

He doesn’t bullshit people when he interacts with someone. If a person does or says something that’s generally rude, mean, inappropriate or anything of the like, he’ll either immediately tell them to cut it out, interrupting them, or he’ll wait until he can speak to them privately. He doesn’t play around when it comes to matters like that. He knows how easy it is to lose people or make them hate you by saying something stupid, so if he sees or hears something, he says something. And if the person is beyond repair in their thoughts, words or actions, he’ll very quickly cut them off and inform any relevant people he knows personally about it.

He actually really loves animated films, especially ones from the mid to late 90s and very early 2000s. They hold a place of nostalgia for him and he genuinely loves taking a day or night to just sit down and watch a ton. Chicken Little, Meet the Robinsons, Brother Bear, The Brave Little Toaster- ones around that vein are the ones that he can sit down and watch for hours. It’s not necessarily that he ‘turns his brain off’ when he watches them, but he likes to just sit and take time to enjoy them for what they are, were and meant to him.

He’s an ‘acts of service’ and ‘quality time’ type of person in terms of what love language he shows to others. Doing little tasks and things such as cooking a nice, comforting meal or helping around the house or running an errand, anything he can do to lighten someone’s load is his favorite. And he needs the same done for him from time to time. Additionally, quality time! A comfortable silence that he can share with someone is key. Simply being in a person’s presence- perhaps just working on something with them in the room or anything of the like, it’s his favorite.

He’s not one for sappy words, although he does use them from time to time to show his appreciation of a person, since he believes it’s what most people are familiar with in terms of being shown recognition/appreciation, but it’s not his favorite. He also hates giving gifts, namely because he thinks he’s bad at picking out the right ones but also because he thinks the act is a little empty. The idea of buying someone’s affection? No way. Physical touch is a big no-no with him. He hates public displays of affection, and the only reason he’s alright with it is if it’s in the comfort of his own home, and even that’s a stretch sometimes.

In a similar vein, the love language he prefers being done unto him are ‘words of affirmation’ and ‘acts of service’. Though he’d never say it, he needs to be told from time to time that he’s doing a good job, to have genuine encouragement and appreciation of what he’s doing or anything else of the like. He’s so hard on himself that he needs that saving grace- a voice to silence the loud ones in his head. Similarly, he likes it when someone is willing to lighten his load- maybe organize his projects and compile them in a format that’s manageable or perhaps getting him something to eat or simply cleaning up his workspace. Generally, he really appreciates it when someone goes out of their way to aid him.

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