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luxuourr · 11 days

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Why manifesting is your best friend + society is a bitch.

manifesting ?? my best friend ? hell no. i need to work so hard...

pookie it's not your work hard thing , your society you live in, we collectively live in , has told us fucked up shit we don't need to believe in, nothing of it is true. The only thing true is what's from the heart and it's the feeling , you didn't and god didn't and universe didn't send time upon us , we used our brains to create it ,

laws don't fail. laws are made laws because they're undeniable.

understand time is not linear , scientists found alphabets otherwise let's be honest , who would have known what's English is?? If Greeks and Egyptians didn't work on time. would we know today?

nuh uh! so I suggest you to remember, don't look at how much time or date you're at, don't look at how many hours until he (sp ) surprises ur enemy with date , how you fail

no time to think of this, think the best of every possible circumstance, I know and you should too, you're doing a great job

even if the last conversation with him ended in a divorce, breakup or failed situation ship, you can get it all back, even if life has not been kind to you and you could not keep up with the most important exam of your life AND you're a victim of domestic abuse or parental abuse. it's not too late, you're not doing anything right or wrong , just because you could not do more than you could because of circumstances, it'll not change your results , it'll not change you getting 100%, if you did everything positively and tried to slap your negative thoughts there's always hope. i say this as I have not prepared anything for the most important math exam of my life and it's 5 pm rn , I have 14 chapters and have the most biggest exam of my life tommorow at 1 pm, have severe depression and the most toxic and hurtful family you could ever imagine to have.

believe me, no one will care about you, until you make it happen.

do you know what your job is ?

- know what you want + assume you're that version, that super model , famous celeb, have that desired body s/o or whatever , fullfill yourself after that and BOOM you wake up in it, won't even take less than a 2-3 days if your belief is good enough, you're doing shit in a fun way to manifest everything you want

- failure doesn't exist , no you're not delusional for attempting nothing in exam and wanting 96% ,you're god remember. the others who have the exam aren't , if you assume you'll know everything without studying that's going to happen, it only depends on what you feed yourself with.

- gone is gone , it's like it'll never come back, if there is something attached , like up coming results from what happened, i suggest assume + accept and move on

- if you script, mediate, robotically affirm, visualize or do whatever, it is meant to happen

- do not worry, you're doing a good job, just try your best for certain things or assume , everything works in the best possible outcomes

- mountains and clouds , centuries and the equator will move for you to get your desires.

- no you're not cursed and shit, life's a rainbow sparkle colors it's all a roses of bed and not what society taught us, just assume and you'll wake up with it

- for example if you have important exams of your life , there's this girl in front of you doing so well in exams , u don't wanna cheat and there's no chances anyway but you realize, the best you're doing right now is trying your level best in the exam and if you have time or not , time doesn't matter it's just created by us, remember she's not better she has no idea about LOA It's , you it's me it's us. Why would she be better, she had to study 24/7 and then still assume about average grades and stress over what's wrong and right , instead you , who could visualize given it well, be the person who got 96% in these exams isn't it much more fun, less tiring and entertaining??

- you got to know manifesting for a reason, trust people who posted their success stories, trust yourself , be kind to yourself and don't let the old story walk over you, it was never there , failure never existed , you've always been the new story you created for yourself, understood.?

- beating yourself up is not going to reverse time again honey, it's gone , it's not coming back , like never so focus on yourself, your feelings , your intentions , your life. Try to know that manifesting is not about trying to get and doing methods to recieve , it's about KNOWING and feeling.

e. g Aliyah is a girl who's a manifestor she wants good grades, she has issues she cannot study because of and cause her to be burn out at home , so she decides , the night before finals.

she thinks " i will try my best and even if it's the point where it wasn't good enough, universe and manifesting has my back, the time that'll be taken by the institute to check my exams , I'll revise everything including all my wrong parts of exam and unfilled parts to fully filled correct answers because crying and whining won't do shit, but this feeling will change everything" , even her bsf in this case supported her and told her that she's manifesting for her and everything plays out in the best possible circumstances. You only assumed like that and made it happen

e. g there's another manifestor called Sara she is also giving the same exam as aliyah , but instead of working on her self concept , believing in herself

, she'd cry for hours everyday for three months so instead of reality giving her the 100% she's been hoping for , she fails she thinks 3D is everything( it's not ) , she doesn't believe in bloggers she's impulsive, thinks crying is the solution to everything , she spends 3 months crying and shitting about herself to achieve nothing in life

prior to this aliyah the master manifestor slays in everything she does, she accepts and moves on , every time bad thoughts get to her , she slaps them with " NO THIS IS MY WORLD IM AN ACCURATE PERFECT MANIFESTOR"

so who of them saved themselves despite abusive household and everything??? Sarah just spent all the time crying and whining.

you can either be her. ( Sarah) or HER (aliyah)

#law of assumption #affirmations #law of manifestation #manifestation #revision #subliminal #void #void state #void success #subliminals

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suguruplsr · 8 months

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Hi hi 👉🏾👈🏾was wondering if you could do a smut of Gamer boy Getou x Chubby Goth YN? It's been on my brain for a whiiiile

Filled to the brim!

✰ ✰ ✰ you just look so cute , so don’t blame him when he fills you up.. to the brim !

જ⁀➴ ily for this <3 i’m not familiar with goth aesthetic so i tried my best babe!

,, gamer!suguru x chubby!fem!reader , mean!suguru , reader has dark/goth aesthetic , suguru implied to be a streamer , he came in his pants <3 , unprotected , cock warming , praising & degradation , cream pie , breeding kink , brat taming ? , dumbification ? , idk

*3 attachments*

“omw baby. do you like them? my friends said they suited me.”

suguru hearts your cute pictures of the new outfits you gained from your shopping spree at the mall. never minding the periodic dings of his phone, notifications of the money you’ve taken out his card. always knowing he could make it up with more hours of streaming. and he tends to look forward to your ‘acts’ of service, such cute apologies for spending so much money even if he doesn’t care about how you spend.

hearing the sound of his queue ending and getting into a lobby, he frowns and sets his phone down, annoyed with being unable to properly admire the photos. turning on his mic and unmuting his sound, suguru hears the playful banter between satoru and sukuna who argues over which characters to pick, “oh c’monnn, man you always pick jett!”

satoru groans, the sounds of his mouse trying to quickly lock her in, and failing, were so loud. “and? i’m better on her. loser..” sukuna chuckles, making suguru smile to himself, locking in sova, deciding to let haibara play sage for once. “he isn’t lying. plus you’ve been playing wayyyy better on gecko ever since he was released.” suguru hums, wincing when he suddenly hear mahitos, obnoxious, voice ring through his head phones. “yea dude! plus you ain’t playing raze this game!”

“could you please turn your mic down?” “yea that shit is loud ass hell bro” haibara and sukuna scold the male, their voices visibly contrasting as mahito whines, grumbling something that couldn’t be heard over the mic. “yo gojo, my chat agrees with us. so go head’ n’ lock in before the game starts..” sukuna snickers, a laugh escaping suguru, “geez man, you must be total shit on her if your fans are goin’ to his stream just to prove you wrong.” their banter only gets worse as they finally load in game, the pistol round was one of chaos, for sure.

eventually, after their ranked match ends in 16-14, with haibara clutching their last round, suguru leaves the lobby to let his friends continue their donation streams. he didn’t really even feel like playing valorant today, especially since he wasn’t streaming. instead, he logged onto dead by daylight, grabbing one of his rehab monster drinks and taking a small break as the game loaded.

before he could scroll through his reels, suguru immediately remembers the pictures you sent him, quickly going to his photos. he was glad for his unconscious acts of saving your batches of pictures before even looking at them, every time. his breath hitches at the sight, god, you looked so cute. black thigh high stockings with cute little bows attached, it matched the mini black dress you wore. it had a ruffled fluffy skirt that sat just above the stockings, the plush of your thighs poking out.

suguru was sure that if he had just bent you down he’d get such a good look at— fuck. his dick was already sticking up high, and as much as he would love to fuck into his hand just from your pictures, it had been a while since you had let him know you were coming home. he couldn’t have his sweet girl walking in on such a nasty sight. sighing and spreading legs wider to relieve the tightness, suguru views the next picture. and he’s sure you’re trying to kill him.

small platforms with cute little leg warmers and another pair of black stockings, little holes in them. with a gray large jacket zipped down just below your cleavage, revealing your busty breasts tucked into a low white t-shirt. your neck was so prettily decorated with silver necklaces too. they were similar to the jewelry coating your hands. so little left to the imagination. more like, his, imagination. he just wanted to rip those stockings and wrap your thick thighs around his head. maybe hold your large breasts with his even larger hands, and suck on your nipples greedily. he knew how much it turned you on.

suguru decides to save the last photo for later, already embarrassed by how he coated the gray sweat pants he wore with a dark stain of cum. finally starting the game, he hoped that maybe a few frustrating games would take his mind off and kill his raging hard on before you could get home. he sends a quick text to make sure you’re alright before queuing up, smiling to himself at the immediate notification he gets within the minute.

and yet the world throws another predicament his way.

“seriously suguru? i just wanna hang out with my boyfriend after being gone for so long. and he’s just too focused on his game to pay attention to me.” “baby, m’gonna get a longer ban from queue if i leave for you again” suguru sighs, feeling your arms wrap around him from behind his gaming chair, already tilting his head to get the small little kiss you usually place on his neck. always on the muscles around his neck, which left him sensitive.

suguru tries to pay attention to the skill checks, his hold on the mouse almost faltering when you don’t stop, leaving a trail of black lipstick around his neck and shoulder blades with every kiss. maybe it’s good he always walks around with those tight wife beaters on. “please? jus’ wanna hang out with you..” you whine softly, one of your hands running up and down his defined chest, cute white and black ombré acrylics grazing him through the shirt.

“c’mere.” suguru groans, watching in his peripheral vision how you eagerly slipped under his arms, sitting up on his lap as he adjusted. “how about this, you sit on my cock and after this match, i’ll fuck you. properly.” a grin curls when you waste no time in rolling down his sweat pants, him sitting up slightly so you could full undress his lower body fully. “looks like you’ve already came..” you hum, palming his leaking dick, your thumb rolling the globs over his tip.

“you looked so sexy in those outfits sweetie. c-couldn’t stop thinkin’ of you.” suguru groans, hiding his character real quick and slapping your thigh, “hurry up baby.” he moans from the feeling of your walls constricting around him, you sitting facing him, whines already slipping out your mouth and into his ears as you hide your face in his neck. “sugu.. m’gonna cum~” he huffs, paying attention to the game, chuckling, “game’s almost over. just wait. you can do it baby.”

his praise has your pussy clenching around him, and as much as you’d love to roll your hips and take his dick without permission. his new chair had arm rests, forcing you to lift your thighs over them, keeping you in place. only able to wet his cock and warm him. “but i want you to cum in me. fill me up to the brim.” your nails dig into his skin, needy for the familiar feeling of when he’s spill his hot cum in you. it was always a lot, always enough.

“only one more left..” suguru mutters more to himself than you. but you could feel his cock twitch inside you, as if trying to stretch you even further. “hurry— please!” your snarky remark was cut off by a harsh and quick slap on your ass that wasn’t hidden under the short dress you wore, him laughing sickly from how high the pitch of your voice had gotten.

“i must spoil you to much. thinkin’ you can talk to me like that..” suguru sighs, kissing your neck as he focused on the last gen that was almost finished. “didn’t your mama tell you that if you don’t have anything nice to say, then you shouldn’t say it at all? tsk. stupid thing.” his sudden change of attitude made you tuck your head, thighs shaking as your squeeze your eyes shut. you loved it when he got like this. it was so hot, yet so mean. and the sting on your ass wasn’t very nice either. curse those skimpy lace panties you decided to wear.

“m’sorry sugu.. wasn’t thinkin’..” you mumble, tears prickling in your eyes when he gives another slap but perhaps the familiar in-game sound of the exit gates powering up gave you some excitement. ready for his match to end already. “it’s okay. you’re never thinking. what a dumb girl i have. so clueless.” the feeling of your pussy fluttering once again has suguru smiling, hurrying his character towards one of the exit gates. despite his low tolerance towards your impatience. he swiftly sits up after his character escapes, not bothering to look at the end game screen and picking you up.

“gonna fuck this pussy right.” suguru grunts, sloppily kissing you as he holds you against the nearest wall, holding your dress up with a pinned hand and almost pulling out, moaning at the sound of your juices dripping on the ground. “please sugu. need you to cum in my pussy. your pussy.” your whines has him shuffling his thick girth back into you, latching his mouth onto your nipples as he begins to thrust up into you. “yea? ya want me to cum in my pussy like a little fleshlight huh?” he chuckles, gaining scratches along his back in response.

“mhm! love it when you cum in me. feels soooo, fucking— good!” your eyes roll back when the head of his cock rolls against your sweet spot, jaw hanging at the feeling of him harshly sucking off your nipples before moving to your exposed neck, holding your plump thighs tight. “bet you wanna hear it too. gonna cum baby?” when you nod quickly, suguru deeply kisses you, tongue’s fighting each other in a moment of heat as his thrusts become faster and sharper. “hear how i cum in you baby. how i fill up— fuck, my, pussy, with, my, cum.” he speaks between bated breath’s, taking away yours in one swift angled thrust, your cunt tight around him as you two stay in a silent needy kiss.

your pussy throbs from the squelching sound his cum shooting into you. you could feel how the ropes of cum warmed you up. it was intoxicating. so sensitive to the feeling of the rest of his hot cum spilling in you. you were already creaming around him afterwards, your shared cum sticking to each other as he finally pulled away.

“sugu.. can you do that again..?”

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starryknight-tarot · 5 months

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𝓐𝓭𝓿𝓲𝓬𝓮 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝓷𝓮𝓮𝓭 𝓽𝓸 𝓱𝓮𝓪𝓻

pile 1 -- > pile 2 pile 3 -- > pile 4

my masterlist<3 . paid readings

Howdy my beautiful souls✨ I'm officially back! It feels like it has been forever since I last worked on a pac for y'all! Thank you all for the messages wishing for my health, I am feeling much better. Today we will be looking into advice you need to hear! I might be a little blunt so keep that in mind. Remember to meditate, take a deep breath, and pick whatever pile calls to you the most. My readings are meant for everyone, no matter what sexuality or identity you are. Since this is a general reading, make sure to take what resonates and leave what doesn't. Credit to @chachachannah for the divider!

Pile 1 Cards: Ace of Pentacles rx, Page of Swords, The Devil, The Star, King of Wands, Seven of Cups, Two of Pentacles, Queen of Pentacles Back of the Deck: Page of Wands

There is a lot to go over here Pile 1, you may have been going through it recently or things may feel pretty chaotic for you right now. For you guys, there are somethings you may be turning a blind eye to and opportunities you haven't been taking. Right now you need to take some time to plan and TAKE ACTION! Think about what you want and what you need to do to accomplish this task. And while this is time for action, be careful not to overwhelm yourself with responsibilities, or rush into anything without properly thinking it through. You may be putting yourself down, thinking whatever you want is impossible or out of reach, it isn't. In fact, I heard it's right in front of you or hidden in plain sight. There may be negative affirmations that you are either hearing from yourself or someone else and it is only pulling you further from your goals when you listen to these words, absorb them, and view them as fact when they aren't. You need to keep in mind the power of words and how they can not only effect you, but the people around you. I heard "when you go around with a loser mentality, you are only going to get a loser result" so even in situations where you feel like you are going to lose or that something won't be successful, you need to try to think positive anyway. I know that isn't the easiest request, however, actively reminding yourself of your positive affirmations and staying determined to keep trying when things get hard can take you further than you ever thought you could go. Use your creative brain and I heard be willing to use your heart in certain situation. With the Seven of Cups, there may be a situation or even a person around you that isn't what you think. Be aware of signs that things don't entirely add up or make sense. For some of yall, this is going to be about a travel destination or someone may be offering something that isn't real. With the Devil energy, you may have an unhealthy addiction to something, for some of you I am hearing your phone or social media (who isn't now a days). You may have been consuming too much media and it is really taking a toll on you. Whatever the addiction is, this can go two way for you, you can take the proper action to help yourself or keep hurting yourself by not getting the help you need. Pile 1, you have so much potential and abundance that can be coming your way if you would just believe in yourself!

Advice Cards:

Be bold. It's time to lead forward!

Release what you do not need. Let go of some extraneous aspect of your life

It's time to challenge old beliefs!

Release all attachments that do not serve you

Complete the project or task. Something is calling for closure

Create an internal structured frame of reference and stay focused

Channeled Songs:

Pile 2 Cards: Knight of Swords, Temperance, The Empress rx, Nine of Swords rx, Knight of Wands, The Emperor, Ace of Wands rx Back of the Deck: Ten of Wands

For my Pile 2, we need to talk about how you see yourself and your own self-confidence. I actually feel like this group is divided into two groups, some of you need to work on your confidence and how you interact with yourself. You may be putting yourself down and you need to stop it! You have wonderful energy Pile 2 and deserve love and compliments just as much as others! You just need to see what everyone else sees. You are refusing people because you may have been taught that complimenting yourself shows signs of selfishness and narcissism, something along those lines. It isn't true, you are talented and strong and deserve all the compliments and praise you receive! For the second group of you, I actually want to say to keep it up and don't give up! You may feel a little out of inspiration and creativity but you may just need time to process your thoughts and really figure out what you need to do! Stay confident and positive in your work! I heard this confidence and outgoing nature is your greatest ally. In the moments that you feel like you can't get anything right and things seem impossible, remember who you are! You are that bitch! The sky is the limit for you Pile 2. You can do it, you just need to trust in yourself, beware of last minute nerves that sneak up on you and make you doubt yourself. Also don't be afraid to take bold action and maybe even trying your hand at a leadership position, you have what it takes you just need to believe in yourself. I think that is a big message here for my Pile 2s, believing what you want is possible and just doing it. I know that sounds like a hard task but I really feel like for my Pile 2s, you guys don't even realize your potential and it almost physically hurts me. Some of yall also need to take a step away from worrying about your appearance, it is only hurting you in a really unhealthy way. My Pile 2s are so beautiful inside and out and shouldn't forget that. You may need to work more on your divine masculine energy, regardless of your gender. (There is a little similar energy to Pile 1 so if you felt called, please do read Pile 1)

Advice Cards:

It is time to take appropriate action

A rite of passage allows you to move forward into new realms

Weigh your situation carefully

Give yourself your own approval

Create a plan and take the first step

Give up resistance in your current situation

Channled Songs:

Pile 3 Cards: King of Swords rx, Nine of Cups rx, Page of Wands rx, Nine of Wands, Two of Swords rx, King of Pentacles, Four of Wands, Eight of Wands rx Back of the Deck: Five of Wands

I think for my Pile 3's, you need to stop being so strict on yourself, I am also hearing that you need to surrender to something. There may an event or situation that you have been avoiding for a long time now and spirit is saying that it's time to face this and accept the result. This may be something that you feel pushes you farther from your goals or you are just afraid of the unknown of the situation, something along these lines. I am hearing that even if the situation seems like it is bound to end badly, the result isn't going to be as bad as you think, it may even end with a pretty good result! I am also getting that for some of you, you are going to or are currently facing a tough decision that is making you stressed and anxious, especially if this decision feels really important, I think spirit wants you to follow your heart with this decision. With the King of Swords, I feel like following what seems logical in this may have a more harmful result then you would have liked. But also remember that you have time, with this decision but also just in general. There is time, life feels like it moves very fast but it may help you to take some time to slow down. I am feeling a breeze and I'm seeing you in nature, feeling a nice breeze blow through your hair. You may want to connect with nature more, I am hearing for some of you, you may just need to take a little walk. I feel like for my pile 3's, you may want to be more generous with yourself. If there is something you have been thinking about buying, buy it. If you have something you've felt would be selfish of you, be a little selfish. I think you need to spoil yourself a little more. I am hearing especially going into this new year. Life is too short not to take some risks is what I am hearing. I'm also hearing some of you need to be a little more delusional lmao. Some of yall should listen to some subliminals, this might be a little helpful in some of your situations. I also want my Pile 3s to beware of conflicts with others, I am hearing some of you could be nicer to the people around you or that you may need to work on admitting when you are in the wrong.

Advice Cards:

Control is an illusion. Surrender and allow the Universe to guide you

Align your body, mind, and spirit with your heart

Create a plan and take the first step

It's time to realize the blueprint of your soul

Be aware of your inner messages

Be adventurous. It's time to go for it!

Channeled Songs:

Pile 4 Cards: Page of Swords, Four of Pentacles, The Chariot, The Hanged Man rx, Knight of Swords, Justice rx, Nine of Swords rx, King of Swords Back of the Deck: Nine of Cups

There is a lot of swords energy for this pile! The swords has a lot to do with communication and possible conflicts in that. I think for a good amount of this pile, you guys need to work on how you communicate but mostly with how you communicate with yourself. I feel like you guys may be putting yourself down and saying things to yourself that aren't even true, and some of you even know that they aren't true. You guys need to realize that you are stopping yourself from achieving things, I don't care how many excuses you may have. Some of yall are manifesting and trying to say all the positive affirmations to bring the things you want to life, however you are forgetting that positive affirmations are only a part of manifestation. One of the most important parts is to actually put in the work to get the things you want. The things you want aren't just going to fall into your lap, you need to push yourself and try new things to get what you want, even if it seems scary at first. Like, I feel like you guys may be telling yourself things to delay taking action on your passions and it's not bringing you any closer to your goals. Which is sad because we have the Nine of Cups at the back of the deck, your dreams are a reality and can come true! For some of you I feel like it won't even be that far from you but you are delaying it! I can see the visual of you feeling like you have chains attached to your legs, these chains representing your past, family, doubts, all of it, they feel so heavy and scary. But what you don't realize is that these chains aren't holding you down at all, you have the power to push through and move forward. I am also getting for some of yall, you may have just went through a bad breakup or ended some sort of relationship, take it how it resonates. But I feel like a lot of you are holding onto this person and want some sort of closure from them, and spirit is saying that there just isn't going to be some closure, at least on their end. Sometimes we meet people, and they break our hearts and some people don't have the emotional maturity to deal with it in the rights ways and that person isn't you. It can feel empty and sad not to get closure on some relationships but what's stronger and harder is to know to walk away when things are getting bad. There will be people that come into your life that will treat you better, that person just wasn't that person. You guys need to remember that you are smart and wise and soooo powerful!

Advice Cards:

Hold your life from a sacred viewpoint. Witness the universal picture

The issue at hand is about reflection. What is the mirror showing you?

Put your tasks and goals in order

Something you've planted is coming to harvest. Results are forthcoming!

Boldly imagine what you can do and be

You are ready to receive your fortune. Be miracle minded!

Bring something new into your life!

Channeled Songs:

Thanks for tuning in₊‧.°.⋆🫧•˚₊‧⋆.

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csuitebitches · 1 year

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Going From a Fixed Mindset to a Growth Mindset

Lesson #1: growth is not linear. You will not improve drastically overnight. As I’ve stressed this before, things take time and consistency and concentration.

A fixed mindset is basically a belief that the person you’re born as - your intelligence and talent - are fixed. They cannot be changed, no matter what.

Science has shown that this is not true. It’s 100% possible to get smarter over time and with dedicated effort.

This is what a growth mindset is - believing that you can be better over time, and that your current level of intelligence and talent is temporary.

People with fixed mindsets are insecure, and it shows. Fear of failure; taking constructive criticism to heart; feelings of jealousy when someone they know is doing well… we’ve all known a person like this, and been this person ourselves at some point in our life.

Growth mindset is therefore the opposite but the effects are as grounding; it can help battling anxiety, depression, burnout issues, behavioural issues and so on.

I understand that a lot of you don’t have people in your life with a similar mentality of personal growth. I’m therefore reopening my Discord. My followers can meet, connect and help each other out.

Now, how does one transition from a fixed to a growth mindset?

Here are some things I think could help:

1. Detaching yourself from the definition of failure

If you’ve already decided the outcome of a certain situation without even trying, then you’re still stuck in a fixed mindset. Things like “there’s no point in me applying for that job because I don’t have the skills and I won’t get it anyway” - applying for that job wouldn’t hurt, even if you don’t get it. Stop limiting your opportunities that you never know could actually work out. A growth mindset person will always try to make most of the opportunities they have.

2. Not getting attached to any outcomes

Don’t get attached to favourable or unfavourable outcomes. When something goes well, have gratitude in your heart but don’t let it get to your ego. Life is about constantly learning. Don’t get attached to compliments and don’t get disheartened by criticism.

3. Actively working on yourself

You can learn a language at any age. You can start learning how to dance or sing or ride a horse at any age, if you’re doing it for the pleasure of learning (getting into competitive stages could be challenging if you’re not young). Someone who works on themselves has a growth mindset.

4. Stop self depreciating yourself

If I see one more IG bio that says “I’m so boring uwu” I will literally throw hands. Stop talking shit about yourself. Classic fixed mindset case. It’s childish and people pleasing behaviour.

5. Stop the comparison game

Stop resenting the people around for the good work they do in their life/ if their life is easy. We all have our challenges, whether we show them publicly or not. The more you work on your inner peace and inner self, the less you’ll feel the need to compare yourself to someone else. Jealousy is a disease and a sign of a fixed mindset.

6. Appreciate and thank yourself for being you.

If you’re nice to your mum, siblings, friends when they need your support… you can be nice to yourself too. Growth mindset does not come from berating yourself.

7. Recognise mistakes and take accountability

Admitting that you’re wrong is never easy. However, I’ll always have respect for someone who can admit that they messed up, rather than someone who will make up stories to justify their antics.

8. Provide yourself with at least 3 productive self-care hours a week

Self care here doesn’t mean skin care or hair care. I mean brain care. You feed your brain good things that it needs to stay calm and ever-growing.

These could include: brain games, mediation, a hobby, watching an educational documentary, doing a short online course, reading… anything that’s good for your brain.

9. Stop being a chameleon

Have you ever met those sort of people who will do anything to fit in? It could adopting that group’s mannerisms, thought processes, opinions… now, to an extent, that is normal and subtle. However, when it starts going too far to a point where you can’t be yourself anymore, thats a problem. In my opinion, that’s an example of not being able to practice your growth mindset publicly.

Privately, you may be growth oriented - but it needs to reflect in your words and actions. If you’re holding yourself back in doing certain things because you’re afraid of what other friends will think of you, you need better friends. Embrace people who have a growth mentality.

10. Using social media for better purposes

I made a separate Instagram account where I only follow educational stuff - think history, geography, arts and architecture, science, tech, business - and absolutely no people. It’s my way of using social media to ensure I learn more. Social media may be the devil, but you can be smart and alter it to your purposes, to give you that kick that you need to educate yourself.

#c suite #powerful woman #ceo aesthetic #personal growth #that girl #productivity #strong women #getting your life together #feminine energy #balance #growth mindset #fixed mindset #mindset #growth #fixed #mentality

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ratrrriot · 1 year

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Do you have any sonic ocs? (Or ocs in general, haha) (totally not asking so I can make fanart, nahhhh….)

The fact that you are considering drawing my OCS when you haven't even seen them yet is very flattering,thank you!!

these are from when i was in highschool lol

This is Spark, They are a Tetraplegic Chao Cream found and brought to Tails,who successfully managed to build a fully functional mechanical body for them to play with. This robot body is connected to their brain and can even fly.

Spark lives at Tail's workshop and they’re clearly very fond of Cream -who regularly visits them to play- and Tails.

Originally,Tails was going to design Spark’s robot body based on his own (for trademark reasons) but since Cream was Spark's “owner” (for lack of a better term referring to someone who takes care of a chao) ,she wanted to participate in the designing part and gave him a few crayon drawings of rabbits, which were so cute that Tails simply had to include them in the final design. This is why they look like a Fox/Rabbit hybrid. (it also makes sense since Spark sees them both as some sort of older siblings)

ofc Spark isn't always inside their robot body,Tails takes them in and out everyday.

Aaand these are some apprentices I designed for the Babylon Rogues! Tundra,Velvet and Ember. They love snowboarding and are developing their skills at Extreme Gear Racing. They kinda need some redesigning...

These three are orphans. They used to live at an orphanage situated in a small town near Snow Valley. Unsatisfied with their lives there (and that nobody seemed to be interested in adopting them) they ran away around the age of 12 to try and start new lifes on their own,resorting to thievery and trickery to get by. Life was hard and unfair for three kids growing up in the snowy streets,but thanks to Velvet's determination,Ember's charisma and Tundra's intelligence they managed to survive. After a year of wandering,they stole 3 snowboards and started practicing the sport ,with the hopes that one day they would become famous professionals who didn't need to resort to stealing. However,by they age of 16, they hadn't just developed great skill and love for what they now consider "the art of thievery" - and a liking for equipment and luxuries most can't afford- but they also had lost all interest on the "safer" version of snowboarding and became addicted to the speed and the danger of racing.

They set on a journey to find their childhood idols: The babylon Rogues, a group of legendary thieves that they heard tales about back at the orphanage's storytime and who's Extreme Gear skills were what originally inspired them to try snowboarding. They traveled far and wide searching for them and once they managed to find Wave,Jet and Storm,they begged them to teach them their ways . After annoying them enough (and practically not letting them alone lol) the trio of professionals finally agreed to train them.

VELVET THE NORTHERN CARDINAL:

Energic,Peppy,Sassy,Optimistic,laid-back and confident. A speed junkie and a little bit of a clown. The fastest of the trio. Jet is his Idol and he'll do anything to impress him. Tries to annoy Sonic to imitate his teacher,but he actually thinks he is the coolest guy around after Jet. He has a big heart and doesn't seem to hate Sonic -or anyone -at all,but he does enjoy some friendly banter at the moment of competing. Jet likes him a lot and is kinda proud of him but he tries not to show it ,as he doesn't want the kid (or himself) to get attached or to think he'll actually pass to him his "Master of the wind" title someday.

The gem-shaped-computer on his neck was a gift he received from Wave after she updated her own and didn't know what to do with her old one. According to her,she handed it down to him cause "it matched his feathers". Now,feeling honored by one of his idols,he wears it with pride.

EMBER THE COCKATIEL:

Cheeky, Rebellious, Brave, Impulsive and Loyal. Doing tricks in the air like its nothing is her specialty. Cares a lot about her looks and is an expert at the art of deception. She is also can be a little bit of meanie. She and Wave share a sister-like kind of relationship. Since they both have strong personalities, they fight a lot and she tends to disobey her,espeally when it comes to the times she tries to teach her about mechanics and "the boring part" of Extreme Gear personalization. However, they always make up and end up gossiping at the end of the day.

TUNDRA THE CRESTED PENGUIN :

Silent, cold, shy, serious, a bit competitive and incredibly smart. Expert at strategizing and finding shortcuts while racing. Has high expectations of himself and doesn't handle failure very well. Being the oldest by a year,he is very protective of his adoptive siblings. Unlike Wave and Jet,Storm didn't have to be convinced to take him under his wing cause he liked the kid since the moment he showed up. tho he is trying to teach him to live a little and be a bit more impulsive at the moment of racing.

#rat answers #my sonic ocs #Spark #Ember the cockatiel #Tundra the crested penguin #Velvet the northern cardinal

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pianokantzart · 3 months

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The One To Blame (Part 2)

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 A followup to my The One To Blame one shot. I took a poll asking if I should keep things lighthearted, but "hurt that plumber harder" won, so....

Content Warning: Blood, torture, vomiting, graphic descriptions of violence.

Needless to say things get a little rough, so I totally get anyone that wants to dip out or hold off until part three (i.e, the comfort part of this hurt/comfort fic.)

____________________

Luigi knew that he had put a fire flower in his pocket some time ago. Chances were it got smashed at some point between then and now, so he was unsure if it would still work. Even if it did, there was little good it could do against a monster who breathed flames that easily outmatched the heat of any powerup. But it was all he had. A useless powerup was better than no powerup at all, if only he could move his arms and reach for it.

Bowser's grip remained firm as he tromped through the halls of his castle, the troops that Luigi had so skillfully evaded just earlier clearing the way. Some who saw the man dangling helplessly in Bowser’s fist took on a look of sadistic smugness. Others didn’t care at all, wanting nothing more than stay out of the way of their king as he rushed past them, up a flight of steps, and into uppermost room of a fortified tower, where he shut the door behind him.

The dark cell was empty save for some old broken chains attached to the wall, suggesting that the cramped quarters had once served as a prison of sorts before being abandoned altogether. Bowser lit overhanging lamps with a puff of flames, filling the claustrophobic space with a dull orange light. “Beg.” The demand was spoken between clenched teeth uncomfortably close to Luigi’s face, acrid breath burning against his cheek like hot steam. “Come on, I know you can do it. I’ve heard it before.” Bowser shifted Luigi in his fist, curling the tips of his claws into his chest, stomach, and thigh. “Beg.” The sensation of talons slowly digging caused Luigi’s breath to hitch. “Don’t! don’t– it hurts! Stop! Please!!”

The mounting pressure didn’t cease. He felt his clothing tear and skin gave way soon after. He screamed, straining to remember the conversation he had overheard earlier, sputtering to find something that would soothe Bowser’s wounded ego. “You’re right! You’re right! You’re right! I should've never touched that warp pipe! I shouldn’t have come to this world! It was a mistake!” The claws stopped digging. The hold loosened slightly, his claws freeing themselves from the shallow puncture wounds they had created. Luigi felt what he knew to be blood soaking into his torn clothes, splotches of red spreading across his collared shirt and denim overalls. “I shouldn’t have talked to you like that when we first met.” He added with a sob, “I-... I’m sorry… your… majesty?” The respectful title felt sour on his tongue, his stomach twisting with shame even as the suffocating grip continued to soften, and Bowser’s look of rage became a self-satisfied smile. “That’s better.” Luigi took the opportunity to once again try to reach for the fire flower in his pocket, but Bowser– feeling him struggling– once more tightened his grip while his free hand reached over to squish the man’s face between his thumb and forefinger.

“You know… Princess Peach was so eager to ruin our wedding trying to save you…”

“Not just me! She was trying to save the Kongs too!” Luigi tried to argue, though with his cheeks painfully pressed in the koopa’s grip it came out as “Nuff jush meh! shewesh tine ta sefta konds tuh!” Bowser paid little attention, and continued… “... I wonder if that would be the proper wedding gift? I’ll let her keep you, just so long as she follows through with her marriage vows.”

When Luigi’s face was finally released he racked his mind for the next thing to say. The right thing to say. Suddenly, his mouth moved before his brain could form a plan, and all at once he found himself speaking from the heart. “Why can’t you just leave her alone?!”

The volume was soft, but the tone was sharp. Bowser responded with equal impulsivity, rearing back and flinging his captive into the wall. “Why!? I’m King of The Koopas! And what are you!?” Luigi had just enough time to adjust his body so that his back took the brunt of the impact instead of his skull, saving him from being immediately knocked out. Rolling to the ground, he heard the tyrant continue...

“You… the stupid underling of an undersized nobody! You’re going to wish I never stooped so low as to ask for your name!” Luigi braced his body up on an arm and dug his hand into his pocket. The fire flower was still there, slightly smashed but radiating warmth. As soon as he grabbed it he felt its energy coursing through him, offsetting the pain of his injuries enough to let him climb to his feet.

Bowser, seeing the powerup activate, charged his captive like a bull, horns positioned to run him through. Luigi met the attack with a flash of bright green flame intended to do nothing more than disorient, and in that he was successful. Bowser was lost for a second of blindness, barreling into the wall as Luigi dove out of the way. Evading the flying debris he scampered toward the door they’d come through. It was heavy, but it had been blessedly left unlocked, and as soon as he wrenched it open he slipped through and ran as fast as his legs could carry him. _____

The sound of stone shattering reverberated through the castle. Peach heard the rumble. Her heart stilled, and her grip on the bars of her cage tightened. “Kamek!” she called, turning her desperation toward the magikoopa guarding her. “Please, you have to stop him!” “With all due respect Princess, until you become the queen of The Dark Lands I don’t take orders from anyone except His Highness.” “I just want Luigi safe! I’ll agree to anything if you’ll only–!” “Even if I believed you… which I don’t…” Kamek interrupted, placing hand on his cheek, recalling the punch that knocked him unconscious the last time Peach agreed to wed, “... once he gets this angry, there is nothing even I can do to stop him.”

Peach opened her mouth to respond, when a flash of red appeared in the corner of her eye. She and Kamek turned in unison to see Mario appear in the entrance of the throneroom, charging toward them at top speed with a look of unshakable determination on his face. He was not nearly quick enough. Kamek, with ample time to draw his wand, cast his spell, and before his would-be attacker was even halfway across the room he was encased in a field of blue magic. “Hee hee hee! Cocky, aren’t we?” Kamek cackled. The captured plumber replied with nothing but a frustrated grunt, gritting his teeth as he was lifted in the air. “No!” Peach shouted. She threw herself against the bars in frantic desperation, but they did nothing but clang noisily under her efforts. Kamek barely even spared her a glance, his attention fixed firmly on his prize. “That’s two plumbers I’ve caught in one night! Although… I believe Lord Bowser’s orders regarding you were to ‘kill on sight.’” With that, he intensified the spell with a twirl of his wand, certain that the sordid affair would be over in seconds. But then, Mario’s body– or what he thought to be Mario’s body– crumbled in a very unusual way. There was no blood or breakage, but instead the little man fell apart like a dry sand castle, disappearing into the air as a fine powder. Kamek stood for a moment in stunned silence. Wand still outstretched he stared at the empty air in utter befuddlement, noticing all too late when Mario appeared once more, emerging from his hiding place behind Bowser’s throne. Armed with a hammer, he leapt down the steps leading up to the throne with a single bound, and swung. The magikoopa was downed with a single blow that sent him flying across the room, slamming into the base of one of his king's many statues. There he lay slumped and still, his cracked glasses sitting crooked on his face.

Princess Peach beamed with joy and relief. “Mario!” "Princess!" Mario rushed to her side. Before she could ask anything else he hurriedly confirmed her suspicions as he pulled a ring of keys from his back pocket. “I had a spare double cherry. Toad is busy getting us an escape vehicle, so I provided my own backup. Now hold on, I’ll get you out of here...” “No! Mario, wait!” She reached through the bars, took the plumber by the wrist and slipped the key ring out of his hand. “It’s Luigi! Bowser, he- it’s all my fault! I–” She bit down on her lower lip, cutting herself off. No. Now was not the time for panicked confessions. Not a second could be wasted wallowing in guilt. In an instant she collected herself and tried again. “Bowser took your brother! I heard a crash coming from the westmost tower. I think that’s where they went. You have to go. Now.” "Luigi?" A troubled look flashed across Mario's face. He nodded, but conflict shone bright in his blue eyes as he slowly backed away. Worry for his brother demanded he hurry, but concern for Peach stilled him. What if the key she needed wasn’t on the ring? What if Kamek regained consciousness? What if someone else caught her trying to escape? Perhaps he should try hitting the door to her cage with the hammer... would that be faster? Would that draw too much attention? “Go on,” Peach urged, jangling the keys in her hands, “I won’t be too far behind, I promise!”

Again, Mario nodded, this time with greater determination. "Please, be careful!" With that, he turned and sped out of the throne room, leaving the princess to sort through the dozens of keys in search of one that could unlock her cell.

_____ Bowser pulled his head from the wall and shook the rubble from his horns as his fiery red eyes glanced about the room, quickly finding the ajar door and the speckled trail of blood leading out of it.

He let out a grunt of annoyance, but he felt little more than that. Luigi hadn’t gotten far, he could still smell the man’s open wounds. Even before Bowser exited the cell he could already sense that Luigi had gone up the stairs to the battlements rather than down them toward the main corridors, probably preferring to try and find an escape route along the castle rooftops rather than risk the crowded halls down below in his injured state.

A risky choice. A stupid choice. There was nowhere to hide up there. Outside, thundering clouds of ash blacked out the sky, robbing the land of any semblance of sunlight. The world was lit solely by the molten rock that flowed about the castle’s base and the golden embers that floated about the air– burnt remnants of what little managed to grow in this accursed land.

Luigi, trying to ignore the oppressive heat, ran along the tops of the castle wall, one hand over his wounded stomach, the other putting pressure on his injured thigh. Thankfully no organ or artery had been punctured as far as he could tell, but at this rate moving too recklessly would sap him of strength before he found a place to hunker down and rest– some secluded archway or tucked away window sill, where he could settle his heartbeat, and tend his wounds. He didn't make it far before heard Bowser’s thundering footsteps fast approaching, his predatory silence far more frightening than any taunt or threat. But while the koopa was fast– far faster than any human– what he had in speed Luigi matched in agility, even in his injured state. Turning toward his pursuer, Luigi shielded himself behind another burst of green flame. He dove beneath Bowser’s legs and weaved about his flicking tail, taking advantage of every tiny gap and blindspot like a skittering insect, aiming flashes of fire at the koopa's eyes until finally Bowser– at the end of his already limited patience– tucked himself completely into his shell, and spun. “Whirling Fortress” was the name of the maneuver. He rarely ever used it, in most cases it was overkill, and if Luigi hadn’t had a powerup to absorb the blow no doubt the spikes would’ve done far more harm than sending him flying into the parapet. But it did the trick, disempowering and disorienting the green plumber enough for Bowser to once more take hold of him, and this time he intended to take full advantage of his position.

After pinning Luigi to the ground with one hand, Bowser grabbed the calf of his uninjured leg with the other, and twisted it all the way around like a ragdoll. A pained screech filled the scorching air as the joints of Luigi's knee, hip, and ankle snapped. The scream rose in volume and pitch as bone shattered soon after, until at last his leg was left twisted in a ghoulish, unnatural position. Bowser, satisfied, released his hold to let the mangled limb fall limp to the stone floor. “There. No more running away. No more hiding.” Luigi quivered from the shock, wide eyed and whimpering incoherently, but as pathetic as he looked, Bowser was surprised he had maintained consciousness. His vague sense of being impressed quickly turned into disgust, however, when then whimpering became retching, and Luigi poured the contents of his stomach onto the ground. “Look at you…” Bowser grumbled. He took hold of the back of Luigi’s head and smeared it against the mess he had made like he was disciplining an animal. “You can’t even take a little pain without losing all of your dignity.” “P-please.” Luigi sputtered, unaware that this time begging would merely trigger a fresh flash of rage. The grip on the back of his skull tightened, claws digging into his scalp as his face was brought back down against the bile-smeared stone with staggering force.

His nose was first to give way, his breathing immediately clogged with blood and a new, searing pain that reached behind his eyes. When he felt his head yanked back for a second blow he struggled to turn his face to save the nose from further damage. This resulted in his jaw and cheek taking the brunt of the impact. He barely succeeded in spitting out broken teeth before the third impact stole his will to struggle, and the fourth plunged him into darkness. The pain continued in unconsciousness, shockwaves of agony rippling out into every part of his body. Seconds felt like hours of drowning in the taste of rust and vomit before he at length awoke, dangling in the air by his wrist, held tight in that familiar, scaly grip. Bowser was talking to him… saying something… Luigi tried to open his eyes. Only one would open halfway, giving him a blurred glimpse of a scowling, draconic face. “Did you hear me? I asked you what exactly your plan was,” Bowser huffed, impatiently repeating his question. “Did you think you could jump out at the last moment and save Peaches the way you saved your brother? That you could bide your time until you found the right opportunity to make a fool out of me again?” The violent grip on Luigi’s wrist made it clear that he wanted an answer. After a few gurgling breaths, Luigi managed to speak with an agonizing slowness, feeling like he was chewing sewing needles with every movement of his jaw. “I just… don’t wa..nt… you to… hurt… anyone,” he stuttered, barely audible. Bowser rolled his eyes. “Adorable. Unfortunately…” Luigi felt his wrist break. He let out a meek cry, immediately strangled by the pain of his shattered mouth. “...You are going to pay me back for everything you’ve done.” Bowser leaned in closer to ensure he was heard, even as his prisoner teetered on the very edge of consciousness. “Once your brother is dead, once Peaches is finally mine, only then will I end your life the way it should’ve ended when we first met!” Luigi was too lost in the fog of agony and bloodloss to properly comprehend what was being said, nor did he notice the distant thud of wooden doors being kicked open, but Bowser's attention was immediately drawn to the new arrival on the rooftops. He half-expected to see a troop of palace guards, rushing to assist in a pointless, but noble effort. To his pleasant surprise, Mario alone emerged from the doorway to the battlements, as if summoned by the whispered threat. He rushed toward them, hammer upraised. When he was close enough to get a good look at his brother, that confidence immediately evaporated and he froze, a look of utter horror and disbelief etched into every detail of his face. Bowser wished he had a camera, but he knew it would only be a second before the plumber’s horror turned to rage. To prevent any further resistance, he gripped Luigi by the skull and made his position clear: “One more step and I’ll tear his head off!”

This successfully kept Mario paralyzed. His feet remained fixed to the floor, chest heaving, teeth clenched, white-knuckle grip tightening around the handle of his hammer.

_____

Peach eventually found the key to her cage. It was bright silver and etched with the words “the key to my heart” in cursive letters, small enough to miss the first time she searched. Nauseated by the adornment, she hurriedly unlocked the door to her prison. Just as she emerged into freedom, the princess was startled by a cannonball crashing through the wall nearby. It wasn’t close enough to hurt her or the unconscious magikoopa, but it rattled her senses, and with her hands balled into fists she rushed to see who or what had created the sizable hole in the side of Bowser’s throne room.

She– to her utter delight– was greeted by Toad, calling to her from the deck of a stolen airship. It wasn’t one of those dinky clown cars or a Shy Guy balloon, but a true airship– built like a miniature galleon and equipped with loaded cannons.

Toad alone was at the helm, struggling to comprehend the controls, but learning quickly as he kept the ship steady.

Princess Peach immediately boarded the vessel on his invitation. She took a place in the crow's nest, and as they stuttered off toward the western tower she gave direction and kept lookout. They dipped low, flying close to the base of the castle to avoid as much attention as possible. Whenever a few unfortunate guards noticed the stolen ship and took aim to take them down, Peach called out their location, and Toad returned fire to great effect. These defensive measures, plus the earlier damage to the throne room, caused a small crowd of guards in clown cars to gather at their tail, but their galleon proved swift and sturdy, easily outpacing their pursuers.

_____

Mario tried to think of a plan, but he was utterly transfixed by his brother’s body. It didn’t look real, smeared and crushed and bent all wrong. He could hear and see shallow, labored breath, joined by a groan of agony when Bowser began walking forward while dragging his broken victim behind him. Mario didn't know what to do. "Save him!" his mind screamed, barking substanceless commands in a flood of terror, "Get him out! Do something! Fight back!"

“The hammer.” Bowser growled, “drop it.” Mario obeyed. No sooner had the weapon left his grip he was plucked up in Bowser's free hand, arms pinned to his sides in a vice-like grip. Bowser, now with a plumber in each hand, slammed Mario into the parapet to ensure there was no powerup at play. Mario instinctively responded with a pained grunt, but otherwise seemed to pay no notice of his own position, keeping his attention fully on his brother. “Luigi!” He yelled, tears cracking his voice and blurring his vision. Luigi didn’t respond, but laid slack with his head still wrapped in Bowser's hand, the slow rise and fall of his chest the only indication that he was still alive. “You know, I originally planned for you to watch him die,” Bowser admitted with a tired sigh. “But I changed my mind. I think I’m done with you.”

No sooner had he said this, he reared back and threw Mario over the wall. A steep vertical drop awaited him, nine hundred feet down toward a wide river of molten rock.

______ Shading her eyes with her hand, Princess Peach caught a glimpse of Bowser atop the western side of the castle. She saw signs of a brief scuffle, then… a familiar red shape plunging over the side. Her heart stopped for a moment when she realized what she was seeing, and she urged Toad to increase the ship's speed despite the fact that they were already pushing the vehicle well beyond its limits. Toad, noting the panic in the royal's voice, did as he was told, and as the ship came into position with the stuttering groan of the overworked engine Peach leapt from the crow’s nest to catch her falling friend. Mario was snatched from the air with perfect precision. The floating properties of Peach’s dress cushioned the free fall just enough that when the two hit the deck of the ship, they were unharmed.

When Mario realized he was alive– saw that he was in good company– he reacted at first with a relieved sigh. The moment of joy was short lived, and his eyes were drawn back to the battlements overhead. “He-… he’s hurt!” The tone of his voice made Peach nauseous. Her fears all but confirmed, she held Mario a little tighter and turned to Toad. “Raise the ship’s altitude! Hone in on Bowser’s position! Hurry!”

“Yes, Captain Princess!” was the cheerful reply, Toad clearly not yet aware of the severity of the situation. With a salute he tugged on levers and twisted the great wooden wheel, drawing the bow of the ship upward at a sharp angle, sending them veering toward the rooftops where the shadow of Bowser loomed against the thundering black sky.

#my writing #Super Mario Brothers #Super Mario Bros #Luigi #Mario #Princess Peach #Toad #cw blood #cw torture #cw vomit #cw violence #angst #Mario Movie

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rrxnjun · 2 years

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i'm not bitter anymore (i'm syrupy sweet) ;; ljn

pairing: lee jeno x fem! reader genre: slight band au, college au | fluff, hurt/comfort wc: 4.8k (4.817) warnings: mentions of alcohol, swearing

a spin-off to my fic i'm not angry anymore (well, sometimes i am) where jeno gets a redemption arc <3

When you first meet Lee Jeno, his exterior calls at you with hard chords that keep slowly burning out. Now, rather than a piercing echo, he holds himself to you like a soft melody.

Lee Jeno sits on his bed, chewing on his bottom lip as he nervously types into the chat he has opened, kicking his leg up and down in a steady, but fast rhythm. Looking around the room for one moment, trying to calm himself down with a loud breath in and out, he glances back at the phone screen and rereads the sentence he wrote over and over again, trying to hear it in his own head, desperately needing the tone to be just right.

hey i thought of you while making this haha

Furrowing his brows, he deletes the words he wrote, huffing out in frustration. He sounds too awkward. Too casual, even. He doesn’t know how these two even go together, but somehow, he managed to do it. He didn’t know he was able to get across two very different emotions in one sentence, but he thinks that this is perhaps his new talent. Maybe he can use it in songwriting someday… if he ever gets back into music, that is.

Fastly typing on the screen, holding in his breath, he changes the sentence from its base and finds himself reading over the new one, trying to figure out if it’s better.

hi! i made you this. listen to it if you have time!

His eyes scan over the words countless times again, hating the way it sounds in his brain. This is too enthusiastic. Too joyful, sounding piercing in his brain. This is not how he wants you to perceive him. Not after all this time, not after all the emotions you’ve awakened in him. Is this the same emotion he used to see in Ryusol’s eyes whenever she used to look at him last year? It’s scary to think that he let her down so much, but he finds comfort in knowing that Yangyang was there to catch her when he let her go. Maybe he wouldn’t be so stupid if he understood this emotion all this time ago. Maybe he wouldn’t have made so many mistakes…

Cracking his knuckles, he rolls his eyes at himself and deletes the message again, promising himself that this is going to be the last attempt. He either nails it, or he doesn’t– in this case, he will keep the whole thing a secret and never attempt to subtly hint you his feelings ever again.

hey y/n :) i made you a playlist

The message is simple. The smiley face gives it more sparkle, a sense of emotion, even. The tone it reads inside of his brain is casual, but with a giving undertone– he hopes it gets through to you in the same way. Adding the spotify link to the playlist he made for you, he finally presses the send button and throws the phone away to the other side of his bed, not wanting to see you react to it in real time. That’s too stressful. He’s not used to the frantic speed of his heart whenever he’s around you yet.

If he really thinks about it, this might be the first time he’s ever tried for someone. All of those times before, girls threw themselves at him at every step he took, every song he used to sing with his band, making countless hopeless hearts break for him when he only stayed with them for one night. He’s never had to try for anyone. He’s never had to do nice things for someone, he’s never had to pay attention to the conversations he was having, he’s never had to give gifts to girls to get them to be with him. They came naturally to him, and he never really cared about their emotions anyway. Love wasn’t something he was inclined to feel, and he never felt the need to have someone by his side for long enough.

Perhaps, he was battling loneliness more effectively– without having to try to make someone stay, he chose to have a different girl every night. It was easier. He never got attached, so it meant that he never had the chance to get his heart broken. Sometimes, he didn’t even realize he was breaking somebody’s heart– he never quite understood how somebody could feel deeper for him, when all they saw was the surface he chose to show to everyone at his concerts and after parties. The first time it dawned on him was when he broke Ryusol’s heart. Maybe that was the moment that opened his eyes.

Lee Jeno thinks he’s never tried for anyone before. In his eyes, this is the first time he’s openly caring for someone.

He doesn’t think about all those times he helped you with your assignments. He doesn’t think about all those times he assured you you looked nice or all those times when he went grocery shopping with you at 8pm, even though he was tired and you lived 20 minutes away. He doesn’t think about all those times he’s given you a ride home and about all those times when he walked you to school, helping you revise for your exams.

It doesn’t click for him when he breaks his habits, even. When he doesn’t try to get you to sleep with him the first night you sleep over at his house when you’re too tired to walk to your dorms, when he doesn’t leave you on read for three days or when he actually listens to what you’re saying, offering advice when needed and being the shoulder for you to cry on when you don’t really feel like solving your problems.

It only clicks for him when he sends you the link to the spotify playlist he made while thinking about you late last night, adding the song he recorded about you and posted to his new solo spotify account last week.

Perhaps Lee Jeno still only expresses himself through music.

Sitting in the university auditorium, Jeno finds himself to be hyper-aware of your presence next to him. You’re sitting in the very last row, accompanied by all of Jeno’s friends– Renjun, Donghyuck, Mark, Jaemin, Chenle and Hendery (even though the band isn’t active anymore and they broke it off for the best for everyone), hell, even Ryusol and Yangyang, even though the boy doesn’t even go to university. It’s kind of surreal how one year can change everything, Jeno thinks; what he thought was the best for him was now broken off, and the friendships he found himself to be mistreating now had stronger bonds than ever.

He wonders how you even ended up in the middle of it all, in the middle of his small galaxy. You two met in the club, where you were working part-time and he often went to drown his feelings away. After he had a falling out with his friends because of the way he was acting when he was too busy with chasing fame with his band, he found himself to be the loneliest he’s ever been, now that he didn’t have the support of others and the screaming rows full of girls that were all over him. Without the band, he often felt like nothing– worthless, not interesting.

But then you came– asking him if he was the Lee Jeno from the band, and if he was feeling alright after the band’s breakup. No one’s ever asked him about it before. It opened up a pit in him, made him cross all his barriers and finally let his feelings take over. It’s mainly on you that he managed to apologize to everyone and realize what he lost.

And ever since that night, he found himself not wanting to let you go.

Nervously kicking his knee up and down, he feels the contact of your hand on his thigh, trying to calm him down. Looking at you from above, he tries to fake a smile as you squeeze his flesh and intertwine your fingers with his, shaking your hands in enthusiasm. Leaning closer to him, you whisper encouraging words into his ear.

“You’re gonna rock it, Jeno.”

Snickering, he shakes his head. “It’s an acoustic set, Y/N. I can’t rock it.”

Rolling your eyes in mock annoyance, you shake your head. “You know what I meant. So stop stressing, you’re a professional.”

It’s been months since Jeno last sang on the stage. His band was no longer in service, but all of his friends and bandmates still encouraged him to join the university’s recital– he was a good musician with a good voice, and his songs had more depth this time around. He almost gets emotional at the growth he’s made, but there’s no time for that when he notices the person in front of him being done with their song, meaning that it’s now his time to shine.

Seconds before he stands up from his place and takes his acoustic guitar with him, you reach over to his hair and ruffle it with admiration. The blush that forms on Jeno’s face is hardly noticeable from the bright lights of the stage, but it still makes Yangyang and Renjun snicker from their seats– they know this state all too well.

Lee Jeno doesn’t realize that now, this is you trying.

No one’s ever tried so subtly for him before.

“So, which one do you wanna watch?” you ask as you stumble around his messy room, getting his laptop and laying next to him on the bed. You’ve been trying to make him watch your favorite movies with you for the last half an hour, and when you finally succeeded after giving him countless options, he insisted that he’s too lazy to get the laptop himself.

Sometimes, he’s a pain in the ass. But more than often, you don’t find yourself caring.

“Hm?” you poke his side as you turn on the computer and type in his password (that you helped him out with when he first got his new laptop. He didn’t know what to set it as and you told him to make it your name as a joke. He hasn’t changed it since.), waiting for him to reply.

“I dunno,” he shrugs, “what do you want to watch the most?”

“I asked you first! I’ve seen most of them already, so I don’t really care much,” you mutter, opening Netflix and turning to him when the pincode comes up, raising your brows up.

“0423,” he mumbles before continuing, “why do you even want to watch movies that you’ve already seen? Isn’t that boring to you?”

“Your pin code is your birthday? That’s… so unsafe,” you mutter as you type it in, shaking your head at your friend’s antics, “and I like watching movies I’ve already seen, because it gives me a new perspective. And also, I like watching your reactions when you watch movies. Your face lights up and stuff, it’s adorable.”

Jeno feels his cheeks getting red again, but he tries to hide it by pulling up the hood of his hoodie, shifting a little in the bed to leave you more space. “Which one have you watched the most times?” he asks.

“Hmm… probably Dirty Dancing,” you muse, grinning, “I’ve seen it like 15 times already.”

“Can we watch that one?” he mumbles, seeing your fingers dancing along the keyboard already, typing the movie title in and searching through the page to find it.

“Why?”

“I dunno… ‘cause it’s obviously your favorite?” he says, not realizing the implication his words have, only stating what he truly means. When you silently click on the movie and let it play, laying next to your friend and putting the laptop onto his lap so you can cuddle into his side, he wonders if this is what all friends do on cold afternoons.

He wonders if there’s something more in the way you wrap your arms around him, if there’s something more in the way you look at him from time to time when your favorite scene of the movie occurs or when you hum the soundtrack under your breath, trying to make him join you just so you could hear his voice. He might have a lot of experience with girls, but when it comes to relationships, he’s utterly clueless.

And when he giggles at the scene with Baby’s sister singing, moving very sternly from side to side, hearing you replicating the scene into his ear almost word-to-word, he doesn’t regret choosing the most corny, romantic movie he’s ever heard of. He might even comply if you asked him to learn the choreography with you. He’s not opposed to anything.

When the movie comes to an end and the final credits roll, he feels a soft peck pressed to his jaw, keeping him from looking at you in fear of not seeing the admiration he so deeply desires to see in your eyes.

He wonders if this was you trying.

“What’s the deal with you and Y/N?” Jaemin asks one day, silent enough to not make the rest of the friend group hear, but loud enough to land in Jeno’s ears and make him look at his friend with shock.

“Nothing…?” he replies, but already feels his cheeks heatening. He despises how his emotions always show in his face. He wants to be cool about everything, but it’s hard to look unbothered when every small thing about you makes his heart race and makes his brain turn into a fuzzy mess.

“Sure,” Jaemin grins with a knowing smile, making Jeno roll his eyes. Of course Jaemin noticed. He always notices first, it seems– the boy has a good nose for human emotion. Perhaps it’s his very well developed sense of empathy. Jeno wonders if he’s good at relationship advice as well, but since you and him aren’t dating, he figures it’s too early to ask.

“Nothing yet, I guess? I don’t know…” Jeno mumbles under his nose, sensing that he can trust Jaemin. The boy knowingly nudges him into his waist, making the older one (by 4 months only, but that’s still something) grunt in mock annoyance.

“Oh would you look at that, our local player finally let his heart soften for someone!” Jaemin exclaims, still paying enough attention to not being too loud, leaving you deep in conversation with Yangyang and Ryusol in the back of the group.

“Stop,” Jeno rolls his eyes, but grins at the comment.

“I love this for you, though. Ever since you’ve known her, you’re different. You’re nicer, you’re paying more attention to others, hell, you don’t even drink anymore. I think this is a good thing,” Jaemin says with an encouraging smile.

“Jaemin, stop talking like my therapist, please,” Jeno mutters, trying hard to compose his expression.

“I mean it, though! It’s… it’s nice to see you actually trying for someone, you know. I hope this works out for you two,” his words are sincere and sweet, leaving Jeno in hesitance. He’s never heard any of his friends encouraging him in a relationship with someone before. He’s never been this close to anyone before, his emotions were never this deep– all of his past encounters with girls were purely sexual, and he can’t even imagine how he could ever live like that.

But before he can open his mouth to reply to Jaemin, he feels your warm hand in his (he doesn’t even have to turn around to know it’s you. He’s not used to the feeling of your hand in his– he just purely senses your presence.), catching him off-guard with the feeling of falling he gets inside of his stomach, suffocating a little.

Looking around at you, seeing you smiling, a sentence of “What are you two gossiping about?” uttered out of your lips, Jeno finds himself content with the state he’s in right now.

It feels good to try for someone.

Noticing you shivering as you two sit in the cafeteria, Jeno finds himself feeling like a worried mum for the first time. Squinting at the open windows, as if he could be mad at inanimate objects for the state they can’t control, he curses in his mind at whoever decided it was a good idea to leave them open in the middle of November.

“Are you cold?” he asks the obvious, seeing you look at him with wide eyes, reminding him of Bambi. A burst of admiration spreads on his insides, but when you reply, he can’t help but glare at you.

“No.”

“What do you mean, no? You keep shivering. You should’ve taken a hoodie with you, you know it gets cold out here,” he mutters, seeing you roll your eyes at him.

“I forgot,” you peep, “but that’s okay. I was stupid and now I have to bear the consequences,” you say, making the boy’s protective instincts kick in once again, finding himself automatically taking off his large hoodie and throwing it into your lap.

“Wear it,” he says.

“But you’re gonna get cold-”

“I can bear the cold. Wear it or else you’ll get sick again, your immune system is more unstable than my mental health. I don’t need you stuck at home with a fever for two weeks again, I’d get bored to death,” he says, trying to reason with you, while also simultaneously trying to make it seem more casual than it felt inside of him.

“Jeno-”

“Can you please just wear it?” he asks, seeing you finally back down, smiling as you put the hoodie on and tug the sleeves down to make the most adorable sweater paws, making the boy coo on the inside.

You look absolutely adorable in his eyes. He never really knew how it feels to see someone you adore in your clothes– while he’s lent his jackets to random girls in the bar countless of times before, it never really held any significance to him. But seeing you in his jacket, drowning in the fabric as he likes his own clothes a little oversized, he can’t help but feel his heart swell with the sight. You should borrow his clothes more often.

Maybe he could “accidentally” leave one at your place once. Maybe you’ll wear it if you find it there. He won’t know about it unless you tell him, but the thought is enough for the boy to go crazy about the imagination.

“You look good,” slips out of his lips, making him instantly curse at himself on the inside. This might just be the corniest situation of his whole entire life– and he’s sent you a playlist before.

Looking at him from under your eyelashes, you almost look shy as you burrow your nose into the fabric of the hoodie, smiling at him. “Thanks.”

“You can… keep it if you’d like,” he hesitantly says, not knowing what’s gotten into him. If Jaemin was here, he’d scream and yell at him for being this awkward with you. He’s known you for quite a few months now– he should already be used to the way you make him feel by now.

You grin at him as you nod, looking away from his eyes and breaking the burning eye-contact. “Okay,” you say.

The table falls silent for a second, both of you too immersed into your own head to register the quietness, when you move in your place and reach towards your hair, dragging the scrunchie that was holding your hair up off your hair, letting your locks fall free on the gray fabric of Jeno’s hoodie. Running your hand through your hair to shake it off a little and give it volume, you turn to Jeno and take his hand into yours before sliding the light-pink scrunchie onto his hand, giggling at the contrast of it against his all-black outfit.

Jeno looks at you with furrowed brows. What’s this supposed to be? Why is your hair tie suddenly on his wrist?

When your eyes lock for a split second, you must notice his confusion. “Keep it,” you say.

And he will. He’s convinced he would keep anything you give him, even if he found no interest in the thing, or if he found the item to be the most unuseful thing in the whole world. It’s from you, so it’s important.

He doesn’t know what the whole action means– he’s too clueless to understand the girl code. He doesn’t know that this was him marking you his, and you letting the world know he’s yours. The item exchange was solely a game of your hearts. A slight push forward to giving this whole thing a new title.

He doesn’t know that this was you trying. But he feels he’s too impatient to keep waiting for signs any longer.

When you first meet Lee Jeno, his exterior calls at you with hard chords that keep slowly burning out.

You never really liked your job at the bar. It was too loud, you came in contact with too many men with high egos that thought they could make your day any better, and you also had nothing else to do than to observe people the whole night. Observing the guests of your bar was one of your favorite activities. Sometimes, you make up a whole story about them in your brain, puzzling the pieces together with a bit of fantasy; sometimes, they come to you and tell you all about their problems and why they chose to drink them away at the bar tonight.

Jeno was no different. You knew about him– because realistically speaking, who didn’t? He had quite the reputation in the town, and you can’t say that the one he had amongst girls he slept with was a good one. You heard all about him from your coworkers– he’s a showstopper, a bad liar, drama starter, a player, fuckboy… you name it, he’s probably been called that name before. And you can’t say you didn’t believe those words, not when you saw him at the bar with that confident smirk of his every other night, but this one evening, when you actually came in contact with the boy, you thought they might have been lying about him just the slightest.

He came to you with a dark look on his face, ordering himself a drink. He seemed out of it– like most days, lately– and you suddenly thought about all the rumors that spread around the town when his band broke up, wondering if they were true and if he really was such a dick everyone made him out to be. His expression is remorseful, the look never leaving his face, and you suddenly catch yourself asking him if he’s okay, met with surprise in his eyes.

You think you must be the first one to ever care about how he feels.

When you first meet Lee Jeno, his exterior calls at you with hard chords that keep slowly burning out. When you get to know him, the contrast between his inside and the act he puts out for everyone to see gets harsher and harsher.

You learn a lot about him over time. They said he was overly-confident when he was starting the band– you just think he was ambitious. They said he was a liar– you just thought he never really had the full picture. They said he was a player– you just thought he never really thought he was playing with anyone’s heart. They all said he would hurt you– you told them you don’t see that happening any time soon.

Nobody believed in him until he put himself back together. Nobody but you.

“I think I’m in love with you,” he whispers into the dark one night, his face illuminated by the show he put up on Netflix to just mumble in the background, when you’re too tired to go back to the campus and choose to stay over at his place, because you sleep better by his side anyway. His words don’t surprise you, if you really think about it– they just fall into place, filling you with a soft harmony, making you 100% content.

Turning your body to him, his expression is nervous and he keeps biting at his lower lip, the habit of pulling at his chapped skin making itself known again like in any situation like this. You don’t even realize there’s a smile spreading on your face, a soft one, to be exact– because that’s how everything with Jeno was so far.

“Can I kiss you?” you reply with a question, catching the boy off guard. Breathless, he nods, letting you completely in, breaking all the walls he’s spent ages building up around himself.

He’s had a lot of experience with girls and you’re sure as hell he’s kissed more than a couple of them in his life before, but when kissing you, he’s as nervous as the first time, a shy boy looking at you from under his eyelashes as you lean closer to him and nudge his nose with yours before connecting your lips together in what feels like a seal of something new.

When you first meet Lee Jeno, his exterior calls at you with hard chords that keep slowly burning out. When you first kiss him, he’s the softest entity.

There’s something unexplainable about the contrast of his dark hair, harsh jawline and the chains on his clothing with the unbearable softness of his kiss, the movement of his lips against yours almost hesitant to get more, afraid of going too far and messing up the moment. The humming of Netflix is no more than a background noise when you pull away from him for just a second, gasping for air and going for more, this time deeper, letting the boy know that he doesn’t have to fear you, that although you’re fragile, in his arms, you have no chance of breaking. His palm, adorned with cold silver on his fingers, comes in contact with your jaw, steading the movement. The touch burns you up, makes you yearn for more, but he still holds you like you’re the finest piece of porcelain, treasuring you so much more than anyone ever before, the drunkenness of being in love with someone completely changing his brain chemistry.

Pulling away from him once again, the state of him takes all air out of your lungs. In the white glow of the TV, Lee Jeno looks up at you with eyes an endless pool of serenity, all wide and glimmering, his lips swollen and parted, aching for more. His cheeks are a little tinted, his raven hair falling into his forehead a little disheveled, his strong features shining with a softened glow, inviting you in for more. You want to keep this image of him forever.

“Thank you for giving me a chance,” he whispers again, into the dark, making the pit in your stomach deepen. He must have felt like everyone gave up on him– like there was no other script for him and he was left with nothing at all. You wonder if he truly thought he would never get a second chance again. You wonder if he really thought he messed it up this bad.

Something about his words makes you want to kiss him again. You lean into him, catching his cheeks into your palms– almost feeling like you’re holding your whole world– and see his eyes flutter close when your breathing fans over his lips, softly taking him in again.

His hands are a little cold when he covers yours, still sitting at his face. “I’m in love with you,” you whisper against his lips, thinking to all the times you wanted to say it but couldn’t, knowing it’s too soon and he’s not ready for it yet. You took things at his pace– he’s never been in a serious relationship before, and you didn’t know if he was prepared to have one, prepared to get attached, prepared to let you stay, when all everyone ever did was leave him. You wonder if the trajectory of his life would have gone differently if his father was still present– even though it’s still only an explanation, not an excuse– but you think you’re perfectly content with watching him grow by your side.

When your lips grow tired of the kissing, you smile against each other’s lips, holding each other close. The vulnerability of it all breaks you into pieces and glues itself together in one swift moment, wanting to treasure this moment forever.

When you first meet Lee Jeno, his exterior calls at you with hard chords that keep slowly burning out. Now, rather than a piercing echo, Lee Jeno holds himself to you like a soft melody.

You’re the first person Lee Jeno ever tried for. But even now, that he’s so sure you’re his and you’re not leaving any time soon, he’s convinced that for you, he’ll always keep trying.

#nct #nct dream #lee jeno #nct x reader #nct dream x reader #jeno x reader #jeno fluff #jeno imagine #jeno angst #jeno drabble #nct fluff #nct imagine #nct angst #nct drabble #nct dream scenario #nct dream drabble #nct dream angst #nct dream fluff

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professional-idiots · 4 months

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TBHK Ch.110–Thoughts and feelings

1. I don’t even know what to say about this. LIKE!!?!!?! Especially because Akane always said that supernaturals only ever think about themselves!!! GUYS… I wonder if this is gonna affect him as a character and his outlook on the supernatural (anyway they’re literally siblings and I was sobbing)

2. SOOO CURIOUS ABOUT THIS!!!! What’s the significance?? Is it a functional key? Probably… and if so what does it open?? Maybe it controls the clock somehow???? So many possibilities 😭

3. WHEN I TELL YOU I WAS SO HAPPY TO SEE HIM. This is my SON. I love him so much and I was so happy natsuhiko went to go find him 😭😭😭😭

4. He trusts him so fully!!! He genuinely thought natsuhiko was coming to save him!! He thought they were—if not friends then at least *friendly* HE THOUGHT HE COULD TRUST HIM

5. When I tell you my heart DROPPED (but I am excited by all this yorishiro talk—more on that later)

6. TBHK character stop shoving strange substances into Mitsuba’s mouth challenge (level: impossible)

7. MYYYY BABY MY BABY YOURE MY BABY SAY IT TO ME!!! IIIII BET ON LOSING DOGGGSSSSS

(AND ON THE ANNIVERSARY OF HIS PREVIOUS ALMOST DEATH)

8. Friendly reminder that Teru is the worst boyfriend ever (he’s actively watching Akane eat shit)

9. I need someone with better media literacy than me to explain what the FUCK is up with these guys bc I feel like I know but like I don’t…. Every time I think I understand shit gets weird again. Like I’m following the story but I cannot analyze this

10. HIS FACCEEEEE 😭😭😭😭😭

OK THIS CHAPTER WAS AMAZING!!! I’m so scared for 111 bc WHAT IS GONNA HAPPEN!!!! I have so many theories and ideas and ughughughugh it was so good (even though everything that happened was bad) 8/10 (I’m giving this rating kind of arbitrarily so don’t read into it too much)

So on the yorishiro thing: I think Kou might become Mitsuba’s Yorishiro. Now I know people can become them but can living people… I dunno. However, I think it’s really likely. I’m wracking my brain on what all this Mitsuba would have to value. Not his camera because that was Sousuke’s thing. And if not his camera, then what? Kou is the one thing/person that Mitsuba has grown truly attached to.

So I think next chapter Mitsuba will be dying, but Kou will somehow be able to break from the time thingy (either he wills himself awake—like has a power flare in defense of Mitsuba—or maybe someone helps him—but who 😭) and goes over to Mitsuba and while he’s crying and being all Kou, Mitsuba is gonna like think about Kou (maybe call him his friend for the first time) and somehow in the moment Kou will become Mitsuba’s yorishiro. TRUST GUYS TRUST.

Also on Mitsuba and Kou:

POOR KOU. He looked up to natsuhiko so much when they met right before the severance 😭😭 if he’s close enough, he would’ve SEEN everything happening to Mitsuba.

And also POOR MITSUBA. He trusted natsuhiko!!!!! The good news is that Mitsuba will probably fully shift sides now and possibly make a more direct effort to help Kou Yahsiro and Hanako. Genuinely though, his mom is hurt, *he* is hurt, his friend(ish) betrayed him. My poor baby 😭 why do AidaIro hate himmmm.

I would say something super smart and informed about the twins now, but as I said: nothing about them makes any sense to me.

Ugh I seriously don’t think I can wait till next monthhhhh!!!! If AidaIro lose it and actually kill off Mitsuba…. I don’t even know what I’m gonna do. 111 better be good or else 😭

#i have so many thoughts #I will cry if Mitsuba dies #(again)#jibaku shoujo hanako kun #tbhk #toilet bound hanako kun #hanako kun #tbhk manga #kou minamoto #mitsukou #mitsuba sousuke #TBHK ch 110 #tbhk theory #thbk ch 111 predictions #jshk hanako

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jhilsara · 3 months

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I Can See You

Pt. 1/ Pt. 2/ Pt. 3/ Pt. 4/ Pt. 5/pt. 6/Pt. 7/Pt. 8/Pt. 9/ Pt. 10/

Pt. 11/ Pt.12/Pt.13/Pt. 14/Pt.15/Pt.16/Pt.17/END

Mariana Jimenez-Watson or MJ works in a normal pub living life paycheck to paycheck. Nothing exciting happens to her except the occasional drunk getting thrown out. She's 24 working away and finds a wrench thrown into her very boring life. His name is Hobie and she thinks maybe, a little excitement isn't awful. In fact she might start to crave some change for once.

Small moments of Hobie meeting his world's MJ. AKA I made an MJ variant and I think she's neat.

Chapter 9

Hobie’s attached to MJ in a way that he hasn’t been with anyone else before. It scares and excites him at the same time.

She’s fun and bold but also is maybe the nosiest person he’s ever met.

He doesn’t know how she seems to continuously find herself tangled in his web of Spider-Man activities. It worries and eats at him, but he knows how stubborn she is.

She keeps pushing and pushing, begging to be let into that world. She didn’t even try to pretend she didn’t know he was Spider-Man.

Instead she had stood there and called him out, almost ripping the mask off his face herself. She just kept popping up. He’s known her for maybe six months and she’s gotten into more trouble than he cares for.

It’s not even that she’s looking for it, she’s like a magnet. She just happens to find him at just the wrong time… or he finds her.

Maybe it’s him that’s getting pulled into her orbit and he brings the storm in with him.

She’s carved out a place in his heart and he doesn’t know how to feel about that. More like, he has a vague idea of his own feelings for her, but that’s a different and terrifying thought.

People like him get others hurt. When people get too close, know too much… they get hurt.

It’s happened before and the literally thought of something happening to her, it’s enough to push him away. It enough to make him shut his brain off and run for a while.

Maybe it’s better if he’s not in her life… maybe it’s better if he stops it before it can start.

He looks over at his wall of photos and sees the many he’s already collected of them. He takes one of the polaroid’s and pockets it before he can talk himself out of it.

He begins to tap coordinates into his watch. He has to get out of here. He knows he’s being a coward and he can deal with that later.

Every feeling is too big and too tight as it pounds against his chest. The anxiety rising in him isn’t fun and he just wants to shut it off.

He jumps dimensions, landing in Mumbattan, Pav was usually good to talk to. Easily excitable and was always happy to see Hobie.

He was younger but Hobie had a soft spot for all the younger spider people. It wouldn’t be a stretch to say he was just checking in on him. Give him something to do before he tries to do something stupid.

Something he’d regret.

Too bad Pav was one of the most observant people when it came to matters of the heart.

He knocks on Pav’s window, surprising the young man at his desk. A wide smile crosses his face as he lets Hobie in.

“Hobie, my guy!” He exclaims and the two immediately fall into their routine. It’s nice, comfortable, not something that Hobie has to actively think about.

This is what he wanted. To not think.

He falls comfortably into conversation with Pav and they catch up. Hours pass like that, Hobie joins him on patrol, Pav welcoming another pair of hands to help out his busy Mumbattan.

Hobie returns the next day and it’s a rinse and repeat. Then again, and now, Pav is too smart to just let this pass.

Pav didn’t have any plans that day and the two men were lounging is his room, window open hoping for a breeze on this unbearable hot day.

Hobie’s stretched out on the floor, not used to the heat at all. Old York was hot if it hit anywhere near 30 C, this was a different heat. Hobie’s vest was discarded forever ago on Pav’s bed, the leather too much for him.

Pav is on his bed, trying to catch a breeze from the window. He looks down at Hobie and just rips the band aid off. “You’ve been here for almost three days… Don’t you have, I don’t know, your own universe to save or something?” he presses.

“Ouch,” Hobbie mocks offense, “Come by to hang out with a dear friend and get the could shoulder. That cuts deep.” He deadpans unmoving from the floor.

Pav picks up his vest and throws it at him. In doing so a small polaroid picture falls from the pockets.

“You’re avoiding something and I’ll find out what it is.” He says in an accusing tone.

Hobie just grunts in reply and grabs his vest. He folds it up to use as a faux pillow. “What? Can’t just come to see my friend?” he asks raising a brow.

Pav’s about to respond when he sees the picture, he goes to pick it up, “What’s this?” he asks raising a brow.

“What’s what?” Hobie asks sitting up on his elbows to look over.

Pav’s face is split into the largest grin as he waves the little photo at Hobie, “More like who is this?”

Hobie’s face falters into a frown, “Give it back mate.” He goes to reach for it but Pav jerks away.

“No no no no! Who is this lady? You don’t keep pictures of random girls in your pocket!” Pav says cheekily.

He gasps quickly, “Is she who you’re avoiding?!” he demands.

Hobie groans and flops back down. He covers his face with his hands, “Should have just went to Peter…” he mutters.

Pav’s eyebrows raise, “Wait, wait,” he looks over the picture once more. Really looking at the girl and her maroon hair sticks out like a sore thumb. “Is this MJ? Is this girl your MJ?” He asks excitedly pointing at her.

“Yes, no, don’t know… it doesn’t matter nothing about the canon bullshit even matters anyway.” Hobie mumbles with a frustrated sigh.

“Ouch… that doesn’t sound very confident.” Pav responds handing the picture back to Hobie.

He’s lost his need to take it away from Pav, he just looks down at it. At her.

“So, what are you doing here then? Are you just avoiding her?” Pav pushes looking at him expectantly.

He’s met with silence from Hobie. He’s just mulling over his own thoughts. He feels his chest tighten again with anxiety.

“So, yes? You’re undeniably avoiding her.”

Hobie stands up and grabs his vest, “I need to go talk to Peter.”

“To actually talk to him or to avoid going home?” Pav questions.

“To talk about MJ.” Hobie replies with a heavy sigh.

“Have fun, his is like the blue print, right?” Pav says playing around with his own watch.

Hobie raises a brow pointing at his watch, “What are you mucking about with that for?”

Pav doesn’t look up just grinning, “Going to call Gwen and Miles duh. This is the latest gossip.”

Hobie rolls his eyes and shakes his head. He sets off to go talk to Peter. He needs advice. Peter for one, has Mary-Jane. Peter also almost fucked it all up.

Hobie doesn’t want to fuck it up.

If you'd like me to make a tag list and add you too it please let me know. <3

#hobie brown x reader #hobie brown #hobie brown x oc #hobie x reader #hobie x oc #across the spiderverse #across the spider verse fanart #atsv #hobie atsv #my art #spiderman fanfiction

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clownprincehoeshi · 2 months

Text

Parallel Hearts - Chapter 7

Synopsis: Never in your wildest dreams you imagined that you’ll meet your ult bias. But it seems that the universe really loves you this time. Will Jeon Jungkook notice you?

Pairing: fem reader x ?idol

Genre: Fluff, Smut, Angst

Warnings: for all chapters-Kissing-Nudity-Sex 18+-Stalking-Harrassment-Cheating-Death mentions Minors don’t interact!

Word count: 5637

Previous chapter

Masterlist

After a few weeks away from your new home in Seoul, coming back broke your heart a little more. Because it reminded you of Mingyu and you still had feelings for him. Just whishing to make the feelings go away it won’t do anything.

Of course you had thoughts about you maybe rushing into breaking up and not believing in him enough. But he had a reputation and you saw with your own eyes. Also, Jun told you he doesn’t think Mingyu did anything that night, because he knew the guy loved you.

Loved? Does he still love you? Did he ever love you? Would you give him a chance?

You really don’t know, and all this thinking gives you a headache. Better think about something else, or even better, find something to do to keep your mind away from him. So you decide to make today a day for yourself. You will go on a date with yourself, a walk, some ice cream, maybe a movie.

So you take a nice shower, put all the lotions of the world all over your body, put a great outfit with a cute makeup and go for a walk.

The November air is pretty cold and you like to feel warm, so you opted for an oversized coat and a fluffy beanie. Also, a mask, because you can’t stand cold air coming into your nose and mouth. Trees are almost bald at this time, the scene might look sad and creepy, but somehow it’s a feeling of freedom.

Everyone should take themselves on a date from time to time, you think. You don’t know why when it’s almost zero Celsius outside, you crave ice cream. Is it because Mingyu used to bring you some all the time and you would cuddle on your couch, eating a whole bowl together?

Memories like that keep sneaking up on you. Every little thing reminds you of him, that’s how your brain works. It was the same after every major breakup you had. It’s normal to get attached to someone and after they’re gone, your mind still goes to them and connects dots.

A cute fancy cake place catches your eye and decide to enter and chose whatever you like. Something with marshmallow and strawberries. Feels nice to sit on a window table, eating your cake in peace, looking at the people walking on the sidewalk.

You remind yourself to workout more, maybe drag Hana to a local gym 3 times a week. Even going on long walks it’s really good for the mind and body, you always loved to walk and observe the city.

Hmmm, I wanna go out and have fun tonight, should call Hana.

Hana: Wifey, hiiii!

Y/N: Should we go out tonight and dance?

Hana: Hell yeah!

Y/N: Ok, then I’m going to the cinema in a little while then going to head home and get ready.

Hana: Who you’re going with? Date?

Y/N: Date with myself, yes. I really need to take my mind of everything that happened lately. I know I just came back from my vacation, but here, everything reminds me of him.

Hana: Wifey, you need some fun in your life. More than usual.

Y/N: I don’t know, not really in the mood for going out. I would just sit on a chair and zone out, and people would just come bother me with stupid questions.

Hana: Ok, then maybe something more quiet, like dinner and hanging out? You could invite Jun too and I don’t know…

Y/N: Girl. Do you like Jun?

Hana: Haha, look at the time. See you later at your place, I’ll bring food and drinks. Byyeee!

She always does this when she’s caught. She’s so ridiculous. But she’s right, I should do more fun stuff.

After texting Jun about tonight’s plans, you walked home. On the way, you stopped at the supermarket to get your favourite snacks.

As soon as you’re close to your complex building, a text comes up on your phone screen.

Unknown number: You look pretty today, but pretty girls shouldn’t walk alone all day.

Trying to remain calm, you pretend the text didn’t phase you, you put it in your pocket and walk a little faster. You look around to see if you’re being followed but now that you’re thinking about it, everyone looks suspicious.

Getting inside your building never felt safer. You ask the security at the front door if anyone asked about you and they say no.

You hurry to get inside your apartment and immediately call Hana. She doesn’t pick up. You call Jun. no answer, he’s probably really busy. Your mind starts to go places and you even contemplate about calling Mingyu.

Ugghh, I’m just sick of this shit!! Why are they doing this? It’s probably stupid Jungkook again. I should be more careful from now on about my surroundings, I never am. I’m so dumb sometimes.

Managing to calm yourself down after a while, you need to unwind some of this pent up frustration, so the best solution for now is going to the gym. Some boxing will sure help. Even at the private gym in your building, you keep an eye on every single guy that’s in your line of vision. Nobody is to be trusted.

30 minutes hitting the boxing bag, already feeling better, then some heavy weighting to end. Feeling like a brand new person. Now it’s time to get back to your apartment, take a hot shower and get thing ready for the little get together with your friends.

It’s 8 PM and Hana and Jun are at your place, eating some Mexican food and talking.

Y/N: Guys, I think I am being followed again.

Jun: What??? Who’s following you?

Hana: It’s fucking JK again? I swear to God, I’ll kick his balls!

Y/N: I don’t know, it might be him. Or I might have another stalker.

Jun: Girl, wouldn’t it be a good idea if you told Mingyu about this? He might be able to help, especially if it’s concerning Jungkook.

Y/N: Ugh, I don’t wanna talk to him though. I am not ready to hear from him or see him.

Hana: Please be careful when you’re on the street, when you’re walking into your building, in the elevator, even when you’re about to open your door. Who knows… I’ve seen and heard a lot of crazy stories.

Jun: Can you promise me something? If things like this happen again, please let Mingyu know. I know he still cares about you and would do anything for you.

Hana: How do you know that?

Jun: We talk, we’re besties. He knows we hang out and he always asks about you, if you’re ok, if you’re sleeping, eating, if you’re sad or lonely. Maybe with time you two can talk about what happened, fix things between you and even be friends.

Y/N: I don’t know, really. If I didn’t have this much shitty history with exes, maybe I’d give him a chance to explain. But I’m just so tired, you know. Just tired. I’m still not over him, but I can’t keep let men lie and cheat. Even if he didn’t cheat, I won’t allow my partner get into that type of situations where they make me doubt them and look like a fool.

Jun: I think you just need to do things in your own pace, nothing more. I’m sure he will wait for you to heal.

You feel so emotional that tears start running down your face, because you really feel loved right now. You have two good friends that are ready to throw hands for you. They both rush to hug you and they hold you like that for minutes, until sobs start to disappear.

The rest of the evening, they make you sit on the couch between them, holding your hands while watching your favourite funny movie, The Grinch.

Hana: Want us to sleep over? We can make a huge bed in the living room and sleep here all three.

You just nod and cuddle into them more.

Y/N: I’m so lucky to have you both. And thank you, Jun, for being genuinely my friend and not having hidden intentions. I feel like so far, all the men in my life that acted as friend had other intentions. So thanks, you’re a real one!

Next morning, Jun left for work early and both you and Hana got ready for office together. You gave her some of your clothes to wear.

Hana: I’ll drive you home after work today, and I’ll be doing that for a while, to make sure you’re not followed.

Y/N: I’d usually say no, but I am actually a little concerned. So thanks, it means a lot. And you know I’d do anything for you too.

Hana: Love you!

Y/N: Love you too!

Today there’s a shoot for Jongga, and you didn’t bother asking who amongst the Seventeen members will be in it. You just knew one of them is the new ambassador for the company.

When you walked into the studio, you saw the staff doing their jobs. Some was sitting on the chair, having his makeup done. Couldn’t see his face, but you were sure it wasn’t Mingyu and you felt relieved, even though you missed him.

This guy has black hair, a little long and a little curly. Wearing a red suit and looking really good from behind. When he gets off the chair and turns around, you two lock eyes and stop for a moment. His cheeks turned pink and it made you smile, remembering the time when you pushed him into that wall and kissed him in front of JK and Mingyu.

Well, he looks hotter than usual, more buff. And that longer hair does things. You were impressed, but then you remembered how he was a little shit to you. So you thought you could play a little and get your revenge. Nothing big, just teasing him.

So you take advantage of the situation and the way he’s blushing after seeing you and you wave at him and send him a cute wink. It works, not his face is all red. You start to giggle and you turn to find the photographer for some last touches about the set.

The whole shoot, you gave Hoshi long flirty stares and smiles. You loved watching him fluster. He kept on zoning out, not being able to focus, kept on running into things, stumbling over. You could feel his eyes on you every time he looked. And each time, you would look back at him to catch him and make him feel shy.

After the shoot was over, your assistant brought some food and drinks and you got an idea. Seeing as Hoshi was getting his makeup removed, you grabbed a tray and put some food on it, stuff you thought he would like, then went towards him and placed the tray on the table next to him.

Y/N: Here, I’m sure you’re hungry. We’ve been here for over 8 hours, you’ve worked hard.

He turned and looked into your eyes and blushed again.

Hoshi: O..oh, thanks! Really.

You touched him shoulder, a little pat and smiled, then walked away. That should do for today, he’ll be thinking about me all day. He thinks he’s a big bad tiger, huh?

Then you went to Hana’s desk to tell her about it.

Hana: At least I am seeing you smile, it’s been weeks since the last time you smiled. But please, don’t break the poor boy. He seems so helpless.

Y/N: I can’t forget how he treated me. I won’t treat him the same way, I’m not evil, but a little teasing will be fun.

Later that day, while you were at the grocery store, you got a text from Jun.

Jun: What did you do to Hoshi? He’s been talking about you the whole day. We had practice for the performance team and our ears hurts from how much he yapped.

Y/N: Oh, what you mean, bestie? I did nothing, I’m an innocent angel. I was just nice to him.

Jun: I don’t know, he kept saying you’re really cool and pretty. He’s insane. What you doing now?

Y/N: Market, wanna cook tonight and go to bed early. Tomorrow we’re having a big meeting about your new show that we might work on.

Jun: Wasn’t Hana driving you home?

Y/N: She did, but the market is next to my complex and she dropped me here. I’ll be careful.

Jun: Text me when you get home.

Y/N: Ok, mom!

You had no idea you spend an hour inside the store, because now it’s dark outside. You have a 5 minute walk to your building. Taking a left, you notice a guy walking your way, wearing black clothes, a hoodie and mask.

Oh. Shit, I don’t have the pepper spray on me.

There’s nobody else around and you feel tensing up as you and the stranger walk closer and closer towards each other. Right when you get close enough to him, you pretend to wave someone behind him, so he thinks someone’s waiting for you.

Suddenly, you start running, carrying groceries in your paper bag. The fastest you ever ran, you think, but then why did it seem like you didn’t move an inch?

The guy started calling your name, yelling after you. You were sure he started running, trying to catch you. So you started screaming.

Y/N: Leave me alone!!!!

Stranger: Y/N!!! I’m going to catch you, so stop running!

But your building was so close and you felt a little better knowing the guard will be net to the entrance. As soon as you reached the door, you started punching the glass for the guard to let you in. you felt a strong hand grab your coat as the door opened and you got inside.

Trying to get away from his grip, you screamed at the guard and threw your bags on the ground. Both hands pulling on your coat. The stranger hesitated to step inside the building, but he kept trying to get you out of it. This is not how you imagined your end.

Luckily, the guard came over and scared the stranger away, and the jerk ran. Your fell on the floor after he released the grip on your coat. Tears starting to cover your face, your whole body shaking from the scare. This had never happened to you, not at this scale.

Guard: Miss, are you ok? Did he hurt you?

But you were not able to make a work for some minutes, you were in shock.

He managed to lift you up and you threw yourself in his arms, asking if the guy is still around.

Guard: No, he ran away, you’re safe now. Let’s get you a chair and some water.

He sat you down, your hands still shaking. You couldn’t stop crying. He offered a glass of water and you drank it all immediately. He waited for you to calm down a little, until you were able to speak.

Guard: We should call the police and your family or friends, or someone.

Y/N: Can you please get my bag? My phone.

He brings your bag, you take your phone out and press the call button.

Y/N: Please come. Someone attacked me in front of my building and I’m scared.

You were sobbing while on the phone, but he understood everything and the only think you heard was “be there in 15”.

When you saw him, you felt like crying harder. Your legs couldn’t move, he came to hug you and tell you it’s going to be ok. You knew that no matter what, he will come.

Mingyu: Tell me what you need right now? Want to call the police?

Y/N: No. I don’t know. Take me upstairs, please.

He took your bags in one hand and your hand on the other. The whole way up in the elevator, you couldn’t keep away. You felt to scared that you needed to be stuck to his chest to feel safe. He was so angry this happened to you.

He put in your door password and got you inside. He felt happy you didn’t change the password after the breakup.

Mingyu: Let me put the food away and I’ll run you a bath, ok?

You just nod, with a sad face.

After the bath was ready, he lifted you in his arms and carried you into the bathroom where he slowly put you down.

Mingyu: Can I help you take your clothes off or you want to do it? I can leave the room..

Y/N: You do it, my hands are still shaking. Please.

You should feel embarrassed, ashamed, but all you feel is safety. Because you know him, you feel comfortable.

He takes your clothes off, then helps you get in the hot tub. While you’re sitting in the hot water, he keeps on patting your head and back.

Mingyu: I’m here, you’re safe.

You finally lift your eyes and look at him and you see how miserable be looks. His eyes are teary.

Mingyu: Want to talk about it?

Y/N: Not right now. I’m sorry, I didn’t know who else to call.

Mingyu: Baby, you can always call me. I told you.

Y/N: Were you busy?

Mingyu: Doesn’t matter, you are more important. But let me call the guys and let them know you’re ok. They were worried. Jun wanted to come too, but he needed to stay for practice.

He gets his phone to call Jun. He answers so fast.

Jun: Tell me she’s ok.

Mingyu: Yes, she’s fine. I’m with her at her place.

Jun: Jesus fuck! What happened?

Mingyu: I don’t know yet, she will tell me later. She’s too scared right now.

Jun: Ok, just keep me posted, ok?

When he gets back to you, he sits on the floor next to the tub, holding your hand.

Y/N: Can you stay tonight?

Mingyu: Of course.

When you’re out of the bath tub, he helps you dry off and put comfy clothes on.

Mingyu: Come on, sit on the couch and I’ll make some tea, then prepare something to eat. I don’t wanna hear complaints.

You sit on the couch, covered in your favourite fluffy blanket, watching him cook in your kitchen. You try to think about how this makes you feel. If you could forgive him and get over what happened. Your break your own heart again, realizing that you could never forget about it and you could never be the same with him.4

And what’s the point of being with him if you can’t get over it and be happy and trust him again? You like to hope though, but deep down you know it. It’s not the same, it’s never going to be the same again. You never want to trust a man again.

You cry again, but this time because of your heart. You still love this man and you can’t be with him.

He sees you’re crying and he comes to hug you and kiss your cheeks. He also kisses your lips, a small peck. But it felt like fire. It burned you whole and it made your heart hurt more.

Mingyu: I will get back to the kitchen, but I’m here, not going anywhere.

You lay back into the couch, wanting to be swallowed by it and just disappear and make the pain go away.

After a while he comes back, food ready. He cups your cheek, asking if you want him to feed you and you say no.

You tell him it’s ok to sleep in your bed and that you need him to hold you. You know this will break your heart even more, but what’s one more, right? You’ve got this far, you’re poor heart is on the floor in thousands of pieces. Nothing will build it back together anyway.

He holds you the whole night, whispering sweet words.

Mingyu: I’m really sorry. For everything. We could talk about everything that happened tonight and between us when you’re ready. I wish I could take us back in time before I screwed up, but I can’t. I know you can’t trust me now and I swear, I could never cheat on you. Never.

You can tell he’s crying too. Maybe he’s telling the truth.

After he’s making sure you’re asleep, he closes his eyes too.

You wake up in his arms, feeling his breathing into your hair. You used to love this, but now it only brings you anxiety. You feel like he’s not yours anymore and that he could just disappear any moment. You hate this feeling.

When he feels you shift in hi hold, he brings you closer and kisses your head. A soft “I love you” passes his lips and you feel like crying.

You need to end this, you can’t take it anymore.

Y/N: Gyu?

Mingyu: Yes, my love.

Y/N: I can’t do this.

He slowly sits up in bed to face you. He wasn’t expecting this.

Mingyu: Can’t you try?

Y/N: I can’t trust you, and every time you look at me or tell me something nice, my heart breaks again. Because I know I can’t go back to what we were.

Mingyu: I was very drunk that night, I admit. And I remember talking to that girl. I just don’t remember going to my room with her, everything is blurry after I left the party. I would not lie to you. I swear. I’m sure this is a set up of JK.

Y/N: I just can’t believe that. You don’t even know what happened, if something happened or not. I can’t forget that and if we’d get back together, my mind would keep going back to that moment and I would feel miserable. It would influence our relationship. Trust me, I know myself. I’ve been there before.

Tears start to fall on his cheeks and he take your hands in his. You pull them away.

Y/N: I just can’t. I can’t give you what you want. At least not now. I don’t know about the future. Maybe 5 years from now I am able to heal and start over, maybe you’ll be married with the love of your life.

Mingyu: You’re the love of my life, you’re the one I want to marry.

You drop your head and try your best to keep your tears inside, but you can’t.

Y/N: I’m sorry. I still love you, but I can’t do this to myself. I would be miserable.

Mingyu: I understand. You…. want me to stay a little longer today? Are you feeling better now?

After you broke his heart, he’s still thinking about you. and this makes you break some more.

Y/N: You can go, I’m ok. I’m sure you need to work.

He comes closer to you to give you one last hug then he gets up and leaves. You know that if you don’t walk him to the door, you’ll feel worse.

Y/N: I’m here if you ever need me.

Mingyu: Same. Bye, Y/N!

God, now I can finally ugly cry alone. I’ll miss you, Gyu!

And you cry, the whole day. He calls you at some point to make sure you’re ok. He also tells you that he will take care of the situation from last night with your stalker. He is sure it was Jungkook or some guy hired by him. He won’t leave things like this, not when you don’t feel safe.

Maybe I’ll get over him in a few weeks, thought would anyone get over the Kim Mingyu? Like…ever?

The next weeks are extremely hard for Mingyu also. He can’t be 100% at work and he feels like shit, knowing he’s disappointing his members. They just had a comeback, they are in full concert frenzy and it’s practice, travel, performing, shooting non-stop. It never stops and he feels like soon enough, if he’s not having some time off, he’s going to go insane. His members are worried for him and try to talk to him.

Hoshi still tried to understand what happened between you and Gyu, and seeing him so sad these days, he decides to do an intervention. He brings Jeonghan with, hoping they will somehow help Mingyu’s case.

Hoshi: We can see you’re not ok, and we can only guess why.

Jeonghan: You should talk to us about it, Gyu. Let it out, it will help.

Hoshi: But start from the beginning, because I feel like I was out of the loop for a while.

Mingyu: I’m sorry, Hosh. I’ve been an asshole to you. It wasn’t intentional at first, you then I thought it was funny how you thought something else. Truth is, she was nothing but an angel. And I ruined everything. She can’t trust me anymore and I understand why. But it’s still hard to accept it. We still love each other and we can’t be together. I know I’m not perfect, maybe I’m actually a jerk and she deserves much better.

Jeonghan: Come on, you know that’s not true. You’re a great guy, 10 out of 10. I don’t know many guys like you. don’t put yourself down. Maybe you’re just not meant to be together. Or maybe it was not the right time.

Hoshi: Look, I’ve talked to Coups too and we all agreed that you should take a break. A month or two. Something like this takes time to heal, we all been there. We will manage and we’ll be waiting for you to get back. It’s not the end of the world.

Mingyu: I think you are right. I feel like I am sinking into the ground slowly. I need to breathe. I need to leave for a while.

After a week, Pledis announces Mingyu’s hiatus that’s going to last for an undetermined period. When you found out about it you knew why he’s doing it and you felt guilty. You wanted to call him and be there for him, but it would do more harm than good.

It’s been weeks since you last saw him and all this time helped you a little. You need to keep distance for now, to heal. Won’t help either of you if you keep talking or meeting. It’s fine, you’ll have him back in your life in the future. Just not right now.

Since Mingyu’s hiatus, you were able to spend more time around Jun and the rest of the members, either at concerts or just simple gatherings and dinners. Jun adopted you as his little sister. Hana kind of liked him, but it was not reciprocated unfortunately.

Today, you had a shooting with the performance team. They are planning an MV for a new song. The set is really fun, they will even get to dance in water while getting their pictures taken. The stylist picked some flowy outfits, all black, for that scene.

As you were standing on the side, watching them dance and pose, making sure everything is right, you felt someone pinching your arm.

Hana: Earth to Y/N!

Y/N: Oooowww! What the hell!

Hana: Can you be more obvious than that?

Y/N: What do you mean?

Hana: You were practically drooling over them, or one of them. Who is it?

Y/N: Pff, don’t be ridiculous. Plus, my bro Jun is there. How could I drool over him?

Hana: Maybe you were not starring at him? Is it Hao? I’ve been seeing you two being flirty.

Y/N: Girl, we are just flirty people, but it’s innocent. And it’s nobody, leave me alone!

Hana: I know you. I know what you’re thinking when you’re making that face.

Y/N: And even if I liked someone, I don’t want a guy in my life. I’m done with men, I’d rather be single forever.

Hana: You don’t even believe that.

Y/N: Just watch me.

She scoffs and leaves you there. Were you really starring and drooling? You didn’t think so. Well, they look good, and those clothes were hugging their toned bodies a little to close from that damn water that splashed everywhere. The water floor was your idea and now you are not sure if you love it or hate it.

After a few hours, the shoot is over and you get an idea, walking towards the 4 guys.

Y/N: Great job today, really!

Dino: Oh, thanks, Y/N! Your team is really professional, they did almost all the work.

Y/N: Nonsense, it was all you.

Minghao comes and puts his arm around your shoulder, smiling at you.

Minghao: It’s hard to find a woman who’s this attractive, smart and talented.

His flirting doesn’t make you blush anymore, you got used to it by now.

Y/N: Staaaahp, it’s not like you guys are not 10s. Any woman would marry you instantly.

Hoshi: Would you?

Y/N: Duuhhh!

Jun: Ugh, stop this flirting, it makes me sick!

Y/N: What about flirting more at dinner? My treat today, I wanna spoil you guys.

Hoshi: Yaaasss, I love food!!

Y/N: I know.

Hoshi: And you know that because.. you like me?

Y/N: Pffaahh! Me? Like you? As if.

A s you all walk towards the exit, you try to annoy Hoshi for saying such a ridiculous thing, so you catch up to him while he’s walking next to Jun and you pretend you trip and push Hoshi. With an innocent and shocked face, you apologize to him.

Y/N: Oh no, I’m so sorry! My eyes are blind from such beauty and such light emanating from your face.

Everyone starts laughing and Hoshi pouts.

The dinner went pretty much the same. You kept making flirty jokes with Hoshi, sometimes making him blush, sometimes getting hit back with his flirty lines. At some point you would talk in a cute voice, pretending to want to feed him a piece of meat and he would open his mouth without thinking. When the meat was right in front of his mouth, you would just take it back and put it into your mouth.

Hoshi: Wow, you’re so mean. I don’t wanna be friends anymore.

Y/N: Does…this mean…you want to be lovers?

And you cup your cheeks with your hands, blinking uncontrollably and cutely, making shy faces.

Hoshi: No, you’re too annoying for that. I like girls who don’t make fun of me.

Y/N: Nooo, please! What can I do to make you forgive me?

Hoshi: For starters, you could make some really cute faces and I’ll think about it.

Then you do your best aegyo, without thinking. Those few shots of soju helped, you hate doing this normally. The other guys start laughing at how cute and funny you looked, but Hoshi blushed. His face was fucking red. He started frowning, eating angrily.

Y/N: What’s the matter? Too cute for you?

Hoshi: Shut uuup!

This banter continued for the rest of the evening and you felt it was the most fun you had in weeks. Many weeks. At the end, you started to become a little emotional.

Jun: Hey, are you and Hosh twins? You’re both the same when you drink.

Hoshi: No, we’re not. I’m more cuter, she’s just annoying.

Y/N: You know nothing, Kwon! And I am fine, I’m not going to star crying like you. I don’t cry for men anymore.

Minghao: Why would you cry for men? Look at you, they should cry for you.

Y/N: Riiight? I am so done with relationships and love.

Minghao: What if you fall in love by accident?

Y/N: I’ll just ignore it.

Dino: How can you ignore that?

Y/N: I don’t know, I’ll distance myself from the guy, I guess.

Hoshi: That’s just dumb. You should be happy you found love, and embrace it.

Y/N: What do you know? You don’t know how one sided love is. Or how it is to love someone and not being able to be together.

Hoshi: Yes, I do.

Dino: Oh, don’t remind him of that, he’ll start crying.

Jun whispers into your ear: he was in love with a girl once and she let him think she liked him, then fucked one of his friends.

Y/N: Oh, shit!!!

Then you go sit net to Hoshi and give him a pat on the head, seeing that he was about to cry.

Y/N: Come on, Hosh, shit happens and it’s in the past. We’re drunk, we should not talk about exes. Fuck them!

And you take another shot. You can hold your drink better than him, and when you see him trying to take a shot too, you grab the glass from his hand and drink it yourself.

Y/N: Here, drink some water. You don’t wanna get a headache tomorrow, do you?

He’s looking into your eyes like a lost puppy. His mouth in the most adorable pout and you just wanna squish his cheeks. So you do it, you let your invasive thought win. You start squishing his face, playing with it, pulling on his nose, pinching his cheeks.

He’s all smiles and giggles, he loves it. You both forgot about the teasing. Without realizing, you end up cuddling into each other, on your chairs.

You don’t know how, but you ended up in your apartment with Hana. She’s trying to make you shower before bed and drink some water.

Hana: Y/N, stop being stubborn and take these off! You can’t shower with pants on.

Y/N: Why not?

Hana: Because clothes are not skin. And you need to watch your skin.

Y/N: But clothes need washing too.

Hana: Yeah, in the washing machine.

You were finally in your bed, cuddling your bestie.

Y/N: I like cuddles. People should cuddle more.

Hana: Good night, drunky pants!

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callmeyoursblog · 5 months

Text

extra angst :)

uhhhh just random stuff cuz im procrastinating on my biology lab so don't mind my little rambles and possible errors

warnings: death, grief

-captain reader, grief after simon's death, revenge and closure <3

he died in your arms. on the field. gunshot wound to the head. his brain matter and blood spilling onto your pants and over your hands as you patched him up, screaming his name. all you remember next is shooting. shooting anyone and everyone that wore a uniform that you didn’t recognize. at least 10 people dead. none of their deaths amounting to the pain that simon’s caused. you’d never had a more accurate hand in your life. it was a habit that began that second. something switched. you weren’t protecting. you were out for revenge. the silence after your 10 consecutive gunshots was different than any other silence you’d experienced. you sat next to ghost’s body. knowing you’d never be the same. unable to find the tears in your body to even attempt to cry.

your hands desperately grabbed at the sheets to find simon’s body. tangled in his hoodie and your sheets from the nightmare you just had.

the one where he died.

the nightmare that was really a flashback.

and as you woke up in a panic, a knock fell upon your door. someone yelling your name. your mind so clouded that - maybe - in a universe much less cruel, simon would be standing outside of it with open arms. you ran towards the door, pulling it open. you didn’t even look at who it was. you knew it was soap. knew there was no chance of it ever being ghost. no matter how much you pretended. you opened the door to see the familiar scot standing outside your door in his tshirt and sweatpants.

"you need to get sleep, love." he'd remind you. a reminder you didn't need. a reminder that you could take a near-harmful dosage of sleeping medications and still get ten minutes of sleep, just reliving the worst moment of your life.

"this happens every night." he'd remind you. a reminder you didn't need. his voice almost grated against your eardrums, hearing him scold you the same way every night. it was a never-ending, vicious cycle. awake for what seemed like weeks on end.

you shut the door after soap forced his way in. pulling you onto your bed to try and hold you and make you get some sleep. truly, he wanted to help you. but he was damn tired of getting woken up by his grieving captain.

the next morning, unsure if you'd slept or just spaced out by staring at the wall, soap stood up from your bed and walked out of your room. you put your clothes on for your run. the habit you'd picked up after simon convinced you to run with him.

price caught you as you walked out of your room. hood up, headphones in, laser focus on getting to your running path.

"we need to talk."

your heart dropped. you were getting put on leave, surely. or getting a psych eval, that you could definitely cheat on, but certainly still fail. he pulled you into his office and shut the door.

"considering that you have worked the hours equivalent to your hours of bereavement for a spouse... i am not requiring you to leave. you have time off, you can take it. clean up your place. clean up his." he paused, seeing tears in your eyes. "i know you're strong. my best asset. i know that this is getting to you pretty badly-"

"i'm getting better."

"y/n, soap comes to your room at the same time every night to try and get you to sleep. you haven't been sleeping. i'm giving you a week." your face dropped. "get better sleep. finish those reports on your desk. we're going back in one week. me and you. i have a way to get into shepherd's office. and i have this." he told you, setting a gun with a silencer attached on his desk. you let out a small smile.

"you trust me to kill shepherd?"

"more than anyone else." he smiled at you. that comforting smile gave you every ounce of confidence that you needed.

you trained every day. to be prepared for the moment you got your revenge. every day for a week straight. running, shooting, and spending almost every hour in the gym. you got marginally better sleep. still awake much of the time, yet still waking up from your nightmares. soap still came into your room to help you sleep, but you were finally able to fall asleep in his arms most nights. price could see you were more energized. ready. working better. he was proud of you, and expressed that as you stood outside of the government building.

"you're just going to go in there, tell them kate laswell sent you. they'll know the name. don't say your name. don't say anything else. kate laswell sent you. his office is the top floor. long ass hallway and to the right. no security besides a key pad on the door. the code is 6163. his birth year and his wife's. i'm proud of you, kid. i'll be here when you leave." he patted your back. you smiled at him and strutted into the building with confidence you'd never had before.

"kate laswell sent me." you told the man at the desk. his face fell as he rushed you to the elevator. you pressed the button for the top floor. the ride up felt like the longest elevator ride of your life. overwhelming anxiety and nausea taking over your stomach until the doors opened, and regaining your confidence. the long hallway lead you to a door, exactly how price had described. you typed in the key code. having a seat in the corner of his office until he entered. mere minutes until his entry.

you sat. and you waited.

he came in, slowly walking into the office to look out the window. he took a breath, sitting in his desk chair and turning on the small desk lamp. enough light to illuminate your figure.

"general."

"captain."

"it must be nice. being able to use your wife's birthday as your keycode, yeah? must be nice not having a dead spouse."

"i didn't kill simon riley."

"it was your orders. so yes, sir, you did kill him."

"you've got a body count of your own. it'll come back to haunt you." he warned you. you let out a dry laugh.

"i hope to god it haunts you." you raised the gun at his head.

"i'm not going to beg for my life. not from you, or anybody else, y/n."

"not gonna do you any damn good." you pulled the trigger, your shot not hitting where you expected. the burning pain through your abdomen giving you a possible explanation. you were left gasping for air on the ground quicker than you could comprehend. shepherd stood over you. the shot in his shoulder not nearly fatal. he kicked price's gun from your hand. not expecting you to reach into your jacket and pull out your own gun as he looked away. a shot landing directly in his neck. he died quicker than you.

it was a blur. people rushing in and out of the room. your vision fading in and out. you wondered if simon saw anything as he died or if the bullet killed him instantly. wondered if he thought about you. wondered if he regretted not giving you the ring you found in his barracks. the warmth that washed over your body was reminiscent of simon, when he would lay on top of you. smiling as you bled out on the floor.

i'm coming home, my love.

a/n i might make a follow up of the boys after your death bc i meant to write about prices reaction outside of the building but i forgot it’s too late for this 😓

#simon riley #cod #call of duty #john price #john soap mactavish #simon ghost riley #general shepherd

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rhettabbotts · 1 year

Text

call it what you want - a rhett abbott series || chapter two

series masterlist | previous part | next part

warnings: none. reader and rhett are oblivious about their feelings towards each other. nosey parents.

a/n: i apologize for the long wait. life has been hectic and i haven’t been in the mood to write but i hope you all still enjoy and still want to follow along with rhett and angel’s story <3

You paced around your room in a panic. You must be mental, that could be the only thing that would explain why you agreed to go through this plan with Rhett. Of course, you couldn’t fake a relationship with your best friend that you’ve been in love with since middle school.

You scrubbed your face with your hands as you tried to devise an excuse to flake out. Rhett could tell his mom that you and he broke up, but that would honestly make matters worse instead of better. Your thoughts ran a thousand miles a minute and you couldn’t figure out one good reason to not do this. You knew Rhett better than anyone. His family loved you, they knew what kind of person you were. It didn’t seem like much of a surprise when he told his mom it was you he was seeing. It was only for a month, thirty days, four weeks - you could handle it.

You wouldn’t even have to see each other every day, make a few appearances at the Abbott’s dining table, maybe go out to the bar once or twice. Easy peasy. You wouldn’t have to kiss, wouldn’t have to be all affectionate with each other. Rhett wasn’t like that. This could work, you just have to stay calm and not let your emotions cloud your judgment.

Flopping down on the edge of your bed, you sighed out loud into the empty room.

“This is gonna be fine. It has to be fine,” you said aloud, earning a curious look from your golden retriever Daisy as she trotted into your bedroom. Her floppy ears perked up as you sighed again and she made her way over to you and rested her head on your knees. “I know, girl. I am crazy for saying yes, aren’t I?”

You busied yourself cleaning your apartment, trying to silence your brain by vigorously scrubbing the stainless steel kitchen sink. Your phone pinged with an incoming text message and your heart dropped when your mother’s name came across your screen along with the attached words “Call me.”

She knew. You were sure she knew by now. And you knew you were going to get an earful because she didn’t hear it from you first. You don’t think she would be necessarily upset that you’re “dating” Rhett, but she would be upset that you didn’t mention anything to her. How could you? You didn’t know yourself until this morning.

The phone rang once before your mom was on the other end of the line.

“You wanna tell me why I find out from Ruth down at Albert’s drug store that my daughter is dating Rhett Abbott?” She questioned, voice tinged with aggravation, but not anger.

“He wasn’t kidding,” you muttered to yourself. No matter how much he pleaded with Cecilia, the word was going to get out fast.

“Mama,” you started but couldn’t find the right words. “Mama, we just - it just sort of happened?” You had not discussed your story with Rhett yet, you didn’t know what you were going to tell people when they asked how this came to fruition.

“How long?”

“What?”

“How long have you been keeping this from me? You know I wouldn’t be upset about it. I’m happy for you, honey. But… have I done something to-”

“I’m gonna stop you right there, mama. It has nothing to do with you. It’s just all so new and we wanted to figure things out before we told anyone. I hope you can understand that. I wasn’t hiding it from you, I was seeing where it went before I got your hopes up.” You explained, hoping it was convincing enough for her.

“I understand, Angel. You know your daddy and I dated two months before we told anyone. I’m glad you and Rhett finally came to your senses, sweet pea. Lord knows that boy’s been pining after you since grade school.”

“Mom!” You exclaimed as you felt your face warm.

“It’s true! Listen, why don’t you have him over for dinner tomorrow night? We wanna hear all about you two!”

“I don’t know. I’ll have to check with Rhett and-“

“Perfect! We’ll see you at 6! We love you, Angel!”

The line went dead and you slumped against the counter. You groaned into your hands as you covered your face. This was going to be delightful. You knew your mother would ask a million questions and your father would berate Rhett about treating you right. The potent smell of the lemon cleaner burned your nostrils and you needed to take a walk to clear your head before calling Rhett.

Daisy’s tail wagged excitedly as you grabbed her leash and your jacket. It was early fall, the leaves had just started changing colors; beautiful shades of golden yellow and burgundy, and vibrant orange. The wind was brisk and the sun was bright. It made for perfect walking weather. You took Daisy down to the park that was close to your apartment and your hands trembled as your thumb hovered over Rhett’s contact. You hated that you were so nervous all of a sudden. He was still your best friend, that hadn’t changed.

As if he had read your mind, his picture and name appeared on your screen signaling an incoming call from him. You sucked in a deep, shuddering breath before answering.

“I need you to get out of my head,” you laughed, earning a chuckle in return.

“Why, were you thinking about me?” Rhett teased. He sounded winded like he had just finished working.

“Actually, I was. I have to ask you something.” You picked at a loose string on your jacket, nerves bubbling in your stomach.

“Anything for you, Angel. You know that.”

“Well… mama found out. Said something about hearing it from Ruth Everett and she was a little upset that I didn’t say anything to her. So… she’s invited us to dinner at the house tomorrow night so we can tell her and my dad everything. You don’t have to say yes. I know you have a lot going on and I don’t want you to feel pressured into coming and-”

“Angel,” Rhett cut off your rambling, “what kind of boyfriend would I be if I said no?”

You could hear the smirk in his voice and you couldn��t stop the hammering of your heart at the word “boyfriend” even if it was a lie. You told him the time and he promised to be there early. You talked for a few more minutes about random things before you heard Royal yelling in the background and he had to go. You didn’t sleep much that night, too restless with your thoughts flooding your brain.

Sitting at your desk the next day was pure torture. You were in a haze, running over every possible scenario that could occur at dinner with Rhett and your parents. Rhett texted you around lunchtime to inform you that he would be picking you up no later than 5:30. The rest of the day passed by in a blur and your stomach was in knots the entire time you searched your closet for something to wear.

By the time you finally decided on something, your room looked like a mess. You feared the dress would be too much for your weekly dinner with your parents but you wanted to put in the effort because it wasn’t just a normal dinner. Rhett was going to be there. As your boyfriend. Well, fake boyfriend, that was.

You smoothed your hands down the front of the dress, pulling out any wrinkles that appeared. You heard the roar of the truck engine before Rhett pulled in front of your door. Daisy perked up from her spot on the couch and she waited patiently by the door for her favorite person to come in.

“Traitor,” you mumbled as you opened the door to see Rhett walking up the front steps. He had forgone his cowboy hat, but his hair was styled nicely. He wore a blue button-down shirt, similar to the blue that was in your dress, and a pair of slacks. He looked good. Gone was the dirty cowboy you were used to seeing. It took your breath away. Your ears rang as he greeted you, pulling you into a hug. His cologne flooded your senses, a pleasant woody smell that was so Rhett it made you dizzy. He patted Daisy on the head before leading you out the door.

“You ready for this?” He questioned. You could tell he was nervous by the way his voice wavered slightly.

“We have to come up with a story. It has to be convincing. You know my dad can detect a lie from a mile away.”

“We can’t just say you kissed me and I knew that was it?” He said jokingly, smiling that crooked grin that always got him what he wanted with you.

“No, we cannot! How about we say that you finally got the guts to ask me out?” Your mind ran back to what your mother said about Rhett pining over you. Maybe that would convince them this was real.

“That sounds like a good start. We were drinking. Drunk confessions are my specialty.”

“And you couldn’t stop staring at me and I asked if I had something on my face.”

“And I said that you were beautiful.”

“And you leaned in and asked to kiss me.”

“And the rest is history. Damn, we’re good at this.”

You smiled brightly at him as you perfected the story, but you were still afraid that your father would see right through the two of you. You pulled into your parents' driveway and you couldn’t help but take a few deep breaths.

“Angel- hey, look at me. If this is going to be too much, tell me and I’ll fix this.”

Rhett had turned to you at this point, grabbing your hand from across the bench seat. It calmed you tremendously.

“No, I can handle them. It’s you I’m worried about,” you said, deflecting.

He just rolled his eyes as he stepped out of the truck, rounding the front to open the door for you - something he typically didn’t do. Your mother was already out the door before you could even make it up the porch steps, pulling you in for a hug before giving Rhett a hug as well. Your dad stood against the doorframe with his arms crossed over his chest, an unreadable expression on his face. What an interesting dinner this was going to be.

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final-girl96 · 4 days

Text

STOLEN HEARTS CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE

New Years Eve

December 31, 1990 11:58 PM

I had moved back in with Eddie, although we slept in separate bedrooms. I wanted to take things slow and steady; get to know each other again. Eddie was trying hard at proving to me he has changed. He hasn't even had so much as a beer; he doesn't even keep alcohol in the house. We'll, tonight was an exception. It's New Years Eve, and we have all our friends over including the rest of the band. My dad was over in Europe, but he called to wish us a happy New Year.

We all stood around the tv, watching as the minutes counted down until the ball dropped. We had the tv switched to a news channel where they had the scene of Time Square in New YorK City packed with people and the ball right in the middle. Everyone here has a partner. Jonathan and Nancy, Mike and El, Robin and Vickie, Steve and a girl he literally met a few days ago. Lucas and Max, Dustin's girlfriend Suzie were here, Jonathan invited his friend Argyle, who is dating Susie's sister, Eden. Will had brought someone he had been seeing. He met him right before Christmas. Even Billy had met someone. Some blonde chick he met a couple weeks ago. Then there is me and Eddie.

The timer was getting closer and closer; counting down the seconds now. We all turned to the tv and started to count down the clock once it hit ten seconds.

I looked over at Eddie and smiled up at him. It was about to be a new year. That meant we could really start over and leave everything that has happened behind.

Our New Year's resolution could be to be better for not just ourselves but for each other. To be better together and not let what came between us this year come between us again. We can keep the past in the past and start building a real life together.

“HAPPY NEW YEAR!”

Confetti poppers popped as we all yelled Happy new year when the ball finally dropped. It was officially a new year. New year and new beginnings. I looked around to see everyone was kissing their partners to bring in this new year. I looked back over at Eddie. He was looking down at his shoes, hands set deep in his pockets. This was a new year and that meant the Eddie that had hurt me was left behind in 1990.

I turned fully and stepped in front of him. When he lifted his head to look at me. When he was looking at me I saw the Eddie I fell in love with back in high school. I placed my hands on his cheeks and kissed him. He didn't kiss back at first; it took him a few seconds for his brain to catch up to what was happening. But when it did his hands gripped my waist and pulled me flush against him.

Later, after everyone had gone to bed, Eddie and I ran upstairs to our room. His hands were on my hips, head ducked down, and lips pressed against mine while he moved me backward towards the bed. His lips moved down my jaw to my neck, sucking on the sweet spot behind my ear. My hands were all over the place, not knowing where to stay. They eventually started to lift his shirt. He pulled away just long enough to pull it over his head and help me with mine.

My knees hit the end of the bed and I fell back onto the soft mattress. The next to go were my pants and then my underwear. His lips trailed down my neck to my chest, stopping to give my nipples attention before continuing down my stomach. He bypassed where I wanted him when his calloused fingers spread my legs apart. Instead they attached to my inner thighs, sucking a mark on the inside of my right thigh. The short hairs of his bread felt better on the soft skin between my legs than I could have ever imagined. It was soft yet coarse, sending shivers down my spine, and making me more wet than I already am.

I thread my fingers into his long curly hair trying to guide him where I want him the most. “So impatient,” he said, chuckling but complying. Eddie ran a finger between my wet folds, spreading me apart and taking a long lick. His lips sucked the bundle of nerves in between his teeth, scraping at it just enough to have me begging for more. It's been too long since I had an earth shattering orgasm. Eddie is the only one who will ever be able to satisfy me completely.

His tongue and lips worked wonders, licking and sucking. He added two fingers inside of me, curling and scissoring. They brushed against the spit only he could get to. My pussy spasmed, the muscles clenched around them. A moan bubbled from deep in my gut, escaping from my lips, and filling the air around us. My hand tightened in his hair, pulling him closer. The humming sound he made vibrated against my clit intensifying the feeling. I came around his fingers with his name on my lips, making a mess of me, him, and the bed sheeting underneath us.

“Move up further on the bed, baby.”

Eddie stood up, sucking his fingers clean before working to take his pants off. I laid there with my eyes closed trying to work up the energy to move. “Don't fall asleep on me. I'm not done with you yet. It's been way too long since I've gotten to feel you in so fucking long.” I jumped at the feeling of his hands running up my thighs. I gasped when he pulled me further to the edge of the bed. He bent knees, pushed my legs closer to my chest, and rubbed the tip of his cock through my wet pussy.

“You ready, Sweetheart?” He asked, slowly pushing himself inside of me. The burning from him stretching me felt amazing. “Fuck,” Eddie hissed, bottoming out. “You're always so damn tight. I've missed the feeling of you wrapped around me. Always so fucking perfect.” He pulled out almost all the way only to push back into me in one fluid motion. His pace was slow and gentle to start off until I started begging him. “Harder, please, Eddie harder!”

He licked his pace up, fucking me harder. Eddie moved my legs, spreading them apart so he could lean down and kiss me. “Doing so well, baby. Taking my cock like a good girl.” He pulled one leg over his shoulder pushing him deeper. The head of his cock hitting that sweet spot over and over and over. My nails dug into his skin, his name fell from my lips, and my pussy tightened around him. “That's it. Come for me. Good girl.” My vision blacked around the edges and my head felt dizzy as I came harder than I have in a long time.

“Good fucking girl. Now you're going to take everything I give you.” Eddie fucked into me harder and faster, his thumb drew tight circles on my overly sensitive clit. His thrust got slopper until he pushed himself as far into me as he could and stayed still, emptying himself into me. I'm on birth control luckily but that's also not a hundred percent effective; there's still always a chance. To be honest I don't think I'd be disappointed if it happened. I came again from the intensity of his thumb on my clit. My legs shook, my breath heavy, and my skin sticky with sweat.

My carded my hands through his hair moving it out of his eyes. “I love you,” I whispered. A lazy smile spread across his face and he leaned down to kiss me. “I love you, too, sweetheart.”

#eddie x reader #eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #rockstar au #rockstar girlfriend #rockstar!eddie munson #rockstar eddie munson #eddie munson rockstar au #stranger things netflix #stranger things fanfiction #stranger things #stranger things au #joseph quinn #joe quinn

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