#enby thirteen rights

[houseswife]

transgender detector going haywire rn…

#the fact that this was in the down low (THEE gay episode) too #this is either transmasc chase getting pissed about being misgendered #or transfemme chase reacting in indignation to being outed #take your pick #this bad boy can fit soo much gender in them #house md #robert chase #gregory house #hatecrimes md #greg house #like I’m trying so hard not to see chase as anything but an annoying cishet man #but the sheer level of queer implications they throw at him makes it insanely difficult #remy thirteen hadley #the more I think about it the more canon it feels #because he doesn’t even have long hair anymore. he’s not so twinkishly pretty as to be mistaken for a girl at this age. so what was this!!! #he has STUBBLE #+ somebody mentioned in the rbs that this is also trans!remy proof and. omg ur so right #enby thirteen rights #or whatever other headcanons y’all have for ‘em!! #prodigal siblings #prodigal twins

[whereserpentswalk]

When I was about twelve I considered myself a demiboy and bisexual, and spent a lot of time exploring these identities. When I was thirteen I started becoming more and more right wing, and discarded any idea of myself ever having been queer. By the time I was sixteen I was using the fact that I briefly identified as enby as proof "trans ideology" was dangerous.

Now I'm twenty and I'm a leftist again. I'm unlearning the things I believed when I was a teenager. I've been out as bi for like a year to everyone but my family, and I've just started using he/they again with my close freinds. It feels like I'm finally coming home.

Being cishet was just a phase.

#queer #lgbt #lgbt pride #lgbtq #lgbtqia #lgbtq community #politics #my thougts #enby #nonbinary #agender #bi #bisexuality #bisexaul #demiboy #demigender

[nightmares-2]

BREAKBEEEEE

Incorrect quotes because im bored and waiting for earthspark season 2!

--

Bumblebee, about Breakdown: Can I tell them they look nice?

Hashtag: Sure.

Bumblebee: Can I tell them I respect them?

Hashtag: Maybe, if they ask.

Bumblebee: Should I show them an oil painting I made of us surrounded by our three cats and four dogs?

Hashtag: …

Hashtag: I’d save that for later.

--

Bumblebee: Yeah, a partner sounds nice, but a supreme enemy you can make out with in secret sometimes sounds a lot more hardcore.

--

Hashtag: I spy with my little eye something that begins with the letter “s”.

Thrash: *looks over at Breakdown and Bumblebee* Mo: Is it “sexual tension”?

--

Breakdown: I love you.

Bumblebee: I love you too. I've waited so long to hear you say that.

*Breakdown and Bumblebee kiss passionately*

Nightshade, to Hashtag: You owe me 20 dollars.

--

Breakdown: Bad news—Robby locked themself outside of their own house.

Breakdown: Good news—we didn’t have to wait around for a locksmith.

Breakdown: Bad news—Twitch finds it very concerning that I know how to pick locks, and tried to unlock my Tragic Backstory(TM). I was too embarrassed to admit that the reason I learned it was because, at thirteen, I figured that was the kind of skill that would impress cute guys/girls/enbies.

Breakdown: Good news—a cute guy/girl/enby saw me do it.

Breakdown: Bad news—it was Bumblebee, and since they’ve already seen me fall out of several trees, cry because I saw a fawn that was just too damn small, and knows I can ride a unicycle, they’ll never think I’m cool no matter what I do. It’s too late. They know.

--

Bumblebee: Okay, I’m going to get the wedding cake.

Breakdown: Perfect, while you do that I’ll check on the ring bear.

Bumblebee: ...

Bumblebee: You mean ring bearER, right?

Breakdown: ...

Bumblebee: Look me in the eyes and tell me you are not going to bring a dangerous wild animal to our wedding.

#breakbee #earthspark breakdown #breakdown #earthspark #bumblebee #earthspark bumblebee

[aquamarine021109]

My mha headcanons.😊

(im probably gunna keep adding to this list because I still haven't figured out what I should headcanon certain characters.)

Izuku Midoryia: bisexual & prefers men + ambiamorous + transmasc demiboy + autistic + adhd (he/they)

Katzuki Bakugo: gay man + ambiamorous (he/him)

Shoto Todoroki: demiromantic + biromantic + demisexual + bisexual + ambiamorous (he/him)

Mina Ashido: panromantic + demisexual + pansexual + genderfae + adhd (any pronouns)

Fumikage Tokoyami: aromantic + asexual + libramasculine (he/they/it/bird)

Dark Shadow: gendervoid (he/it/they/xe/fae/bird/shadow/dark)

Momo Yaoyorozu: pansexual (she/her)

Toru Hagakura : biromantic + demisexual + agender paragirl + adhd (she/they/it/xe/fae/ghost)

Ochaco Uraraka: bisexual (she/her)

Eijiro Kirishima: bisexual & prefers men + ambiamorous + trans guy (he/him)

Tenya Iida: biromantic + demisexual + bisexual + paraboy + adhd + autistic + ocd (he/they)

Tsuyu Asui: apothiromantic + apothisexual + librafeminine + froggender + autistic and tics/stims sometimes (she/they/it/frog)

Yuga Aoyama: gay (likes men) + bigender + flamboyant (he/they/she)

Kyoka Jiro: bisexual + genderfluid + autistic (she/they/he)

Midnight: biromantic & prefers men + aegosexual (sex-favorable)(she/her)

Endeavor: bisexual but doesn't know it yet (he/him)

Eraser Head: demiromantic + biromantic + demisexual + bisexual + ambiamorous + insomnia + autistic (he/him)

All Might: bisexual (he/him)

Mt.lady: pansexual + trans woman (she/her)

Thirteen: aromantic + asexual + agender + gendervoid (they/she/he/it/voids/xe)

Kamui Woods: pansexual + trans guy (he/him)

Cementoss: aromantic + asexual + agender (he/they/it/cement/xe)

Mr.Principle: aromantic + asexual (he/they/it/mouse/rat/hamster/ginniepig)

Recovery girl: lesbian (she/her)

Present Mic: pansexual + genderfluid + ambiamorous + adhd (any pronouns)

Koji Koda: aromantic + asexual + agender + autistic (he/they/it)

Mezo Shoji: pansexual + agender paraboy (he/they/it)

Denki Kaminari: omnisexual & prefers men + ambiamorous (he/him)

Ibara Shiozaki: biromantic + demisexual + bisexual + transfem + agender paragirl (she/they/it/plants/vines)

Tetsutetsu Tetsutetsu: gay (likes men) + agender demiboy (he/they/it/metal)

Mei Hatsume: pansexual + non-binary paragirl (she/they)

Hitoshi Shinsou: biromantic + demisexual + bisexual + insomnia + autistic + depression + probably some ptsd (he/him)

Tomura Shigaraki: homoromantic + demisexual + homosexual + agender demiboy (he/they/it)

Himiko Toga: bisexual & prefers men (she/her)

Suneater (aka one of my fav characters and crushes): biromantic & prefers men + demisexual + bisexual + transmasc agender demiboy + autistic and very shy (he/they)

Ms.Joke: pansexual (she/her)

Dabi: pansexual + demiboy (he/they/it/stitches)

Reiko Yanagi: omniromantic & prefers enbys + asexual + nonbinary (they/she)

Hawks (aka my new biggest crush right now): omnisexual & highly prefers men + intersex (he/him)

Natsu Todoroki: biromantic + demisexual + bisexual (he/him)

Fuyumi Todoroki: homoromantic + asexual (she/her)

Oboro Shirakumo: gay (likes men) + polyamorous + transmasc demiboy (he/they)

Sirius: biromantic + asexual (she/her)

#my hero academia #izuku midoriya #katsuki bakugou #shoto todoroki #mina ashido #fumikage tokoyami #dark shadow #momo yaoyorozu #toru hagakure #ochako uraraka #eijiro kirishima #tenya lida #tsuyu asui #yuga aoyama #kyoka jiro #mha midnight #mha endeavor #eraserhead #all might #mt lady #mha thirteen #kamui woods #cementoss #principal nezu #recovery girl #present mic #koji koda #mezo shoji #denki kaminari #ibara shiozaki

[radley-writes]

Tell me! About the new wip! Yell things! Plz!

mundus transit et concupiscentia eius

Title: DREAMHUNTERS. or SOMNUS SANCTI. or THE SANDMEN'S SCHOOL FOR SLEEPLESS YOUTH. idk hfjfjgfgj

Age range: MG or YA (haven't yet decided the MCs' ages...) Genre: urban fantasy, high school fantasy, light horror Main characters: Zack, white British bi trans boy, 13-15, absolute coward and proud of it. Sour and sneaky, he doesn't know how to do this whole friend thing and doesn't intend to start. Reacts to kindness like a feral kitten to strokes; would lie about getting bitten in a zombie apocalypse. Zoe, Pakistani-British hijabi bi cis girl, 13-15. Fun-loving and adventurous, she's the sunshine to Zack's scowl. In fact, she's a little too eager to throw herself into danger. She has all the self-preservation instinct of a gingernut biscuit and (worse yet, if you ask Zack) a deep-seated desire to do the right thing. Vanderloss, Black British disabled Ehlers-Danlos enbie, 26-ish. An overpowered disaster of a teacher. Despite caring deeply for all xer little brats, xe remains an extremely distractable dork. Has lost children on school trips. Will do it again. I love xem anyway. <3

Every night in Cambridge, the Time Eater clock strikes twelve.

Then it strikes thirteen.

And the monsters come out.

Reality and Dream: two worlds in a locked orbit, converging only at their furthest-flung edges. During the thirteenth hour, when time traps mortals like flies in tree sap, nightmares seep into our realm and devour human minds. They leave comatose victims in their wake, lost to the deadly Sleeping Sickness, as well as a constant, palpable undercurrent of fear.

But the nightmares should be frightened, too.

Beneath the grand Gothic vaults of Trinity and Kings lies another world of academia - one far more ancient, devoted to the arcane. Every year, a hundred humans are born a step outside of time, able to walk through the inverted lightscape of the Thirteenth Hour as if they too are spun not from substance, but surreality. The Sandman Academy gathers these youths, grants them their hourglasses - containing solidified granules of sunlight, the only effective weapon against dreams - and trains them to fight for all humanity.

And to die.

Horribly.

Torn apart by their worst nightmares.

So, when Zack Strange is chosen as one of humanity's guardians, you can see why his reaction is no way in hell. Allergic to risk-taking, conflict, things that go boo in the night (and, some would say, fun) Zack just wants to restart his nice, normal life at his nice, normal school, under his new name. And to find a binder that's comfy for PE class. Is that really too much to ask?

In contrast, when Zoe Ansari received a giant hourglass and was told she would train to slay nightmares, her only question was when do we start? Zoe quickly falls in love with the warped Escher-world of the Thirteenth Hour. She knows no fear. She knows no danger. She knows, if you ask Zack, far less than she thinks she does, and is likely to get herself and everyone in a ten-mile radius dead - which makes it a crying shame that he's her training partner.

Zack grudgingly joins the Sandmen in the hopes that they can save his grandma, who is in hospital after having her mind stolen by a dream. But shadowed secrets lurk in the heart of their new school. When Zack and Zoe discover a dangerous truth about the Sleeping Sickness, they will be forced to question their loyalty to the school and each other, and what it truly means to be brave.

#writeblr #writers on tumblr #wip #my writing #am writing #original fiction #original novel #original writing #original story #amwriting #sandmen #radley writes #somnus sancti

[cgi-heart-eyes]

dndads incorrect quotes

long post ahead

the teens:

Scary: I hate you sometimes.  Normal: Well according to this picture Link drew of us holding hands that's not true.  Scary: Normal, you drew that.  Normal: It doesn't matter

Scary: I just watched Normal jump off of a spinning chair. Luckily, they weren't hurt that badly. But the whole time, Link was screaming for help, which caused Taylor to run in to help Normal. Just note that all of this happened in the span of six minutes.

Scary: Self care is actually getting into fights with randoms in dark alleys.  Normal: No, self care is stuff like taking a bubble bath, or putting on a lot of makeup if you like it, or taking a nice warm nap!  Link: Self care is the burning heat when rage washes over you!! Self care is when you feel the bones crack under your powerful fists!! Self care is the fear in your enemies’ eyes!!!  Taylor: Lmao self care is taking your birthday cake just so I can eat the frosting.  Scary: If you touch my birthday cake I’ll make you eat your hands.

Scary: I think Taylor was right.  Normal: I'm surprised they haven't marched in here to say 'I told you so.'  Link: They wouldn't do that.  Taylor: You're right, Link. For once in your life, you're 100% right. I would never say that.  Taylor: *turns around, the shirt they're wearing says 'Taylor Told You So' on the back*

Scary: Normal, I'm sad. Normal: *Holds out arms for a hug* It’s going to be okay. Link: Taylor, I'm sad. Taylor, nodding: mood.

Cop: You’re receiving a ticket for having three people on one motorcycle.  Scary: Shit.  Normal: Wait, three?  Cop: Yeah?  Link: OH MY GOD TAYLOR FELL OFF!!

Scary: Why are your tongues purple? Link: We had slushies. I had a blue one. Taylor: I had a red one. Scary: oh Scary: Scary: OH Normal: Normal: You drank each other's slushies?

Scary: There is no future. there is no past. do you see? Time is simultaneous, an intricately structured jewel that humans insist on viewing one edge at a time, when the whole design is visible in every facet.  Normal:  Link:  Taylor:  Everyone Else At Scary’s Surprise Birthday Party:  Normal: All I asked was if you wanted to cut your birthday cake first.

dads:

Ron: Why are Henry and Darryl sitting with their backs to each other? Glenn: They had a fight. Ron: Then why are they holding hands? Glenn: They get sad when they fight.

Henry: How did none of you hear what I just said?  Darryl: I’ve been zoned out for the past two and a half hours.  Ron: I got distracted about halfway through.  Glenn: Ignoring you was a conscious decision.

Henry: Everyone, synchronize your watches.  Darryl: I don’t know how to do that.  Ron: I don’t wear a watch.  Glenn: Time is a construct.

Henry: So my therapist was talking to me and she said that I really just need to break down my walls and let people in.  Henry: So I’ve decided to break the fourth wall.  Henry: *looks at camera* Hi there. I use humor as a coping mechanism.

Henry: Physically, yes, I could fight a bird, but emotionally? Imagine the toll!

Henry: I’m this close to falling in love with Darryl. Glenn: Your fingertips are touching. Henry: Exactly.

Glenn: Bad news—Ron locked themself outside of their own house. Glenn: Good news—we didn’t have to wait around for a locksmith. Glenn: Bad news—Darryl finds it very concerning that I know how to pick locks, and tried to unlock my Tragic Backstory(TM). I was too embarrassed to admit that the reason I learned it was because, at thirteen, I figured that was the kind of skill that would impress cute guys/girls/enbies. Glenn: Good news—a cute guy/girl/enby saw me do it. Glenn: Bad news—it was Henry, and since they’ve already seen me fall out of several trees, cry because I saw a fawn that was just too damn small, and knows I can ride a unicycle, they’ll never think I’m cool no matter what I do. It’s too late. They know.

Glenn, explaining why they are not allowed to cook: I put the noodles in the pot and put the pot on the stove and turned the burner on high. Turns out you don't put noodles in marijuana and I almost burnt the whole house down.

kiddads:

Lark, to Grant: I mean, I get complimented all the time- Sparrow: starts cackling Lark: I do! Sparrow: laughs harder

Grant: Yesterday, I overheard Lark saying “Are you sure this is a good idea?” and Sparrow replying “Trust me,” and I have never moved from one room to another so quickly in my life.

Terry: Why don’t you go talk to them? Grant, sarcastically: Oh. Yeah, sure. Terry: What? So you go tell them they’re cute, what’s the worst that could happen? Grant: They could hear me.

Nicky: Sweet dog you got there. Police: Yes, this is our new drug sniffing dog. Nicky: Still training huh? Police: What do you mean? Nicky: Nicky: Never mind.

Nicky: "What are you into?" is such a broad question, like do I reply with a TV series or choking?

Grant: I am going to cry. I’m going to cry until I can no longer physically cry anymore because all the water in my body is gone and I die from dehydration. Terry: Are you okay? Lark: Did you actually just ask them that? Like, you need that to be answered otherwise you won’t know?

Lark: You've got to act tough, Sparrow! Show 'em you can't be pushed around! Show 'em they can't mess with you! Sparrow: Right. Yes. Tough. Got it. Sparrow, standing up on their stool and slamming their hands down on the bar: I'LL TAKE A CHOCOLATE MILK.

Terry: Watcha got there..? Sparrow: petting a ostrich A smoothie.

i’ll probably add more at some point, this was really fun to make!

#dndads

[prpfs]

hey hey!! 🪐💫

23+enbie here on the hunt for doctor who rps!! i watched the 60th special and fell right back in love with the show and i'm hoping to get some plots going over on discord!

the main muse i want to play is an oc i'm working on, they're an alien raised here on earth with all the nervous energy of a borzoi in a rainstorm, but with an extensive knowledge about a lot of things and some pretty cool abilities if i do say so myself! their bio is a wip but i have TONS of info on them and their species already!

i also have canon muses too - fourteen, thirteen, the metacrisis doctor, amy pond, martha jones, and river song!

i love aus, canon shenanigans, polyamorous ships, smut, angst, fluff, and dead dove themes, so hit me with any ideas you may have! just leave a like and i will reach out as soon as i can!

give a like and anon will get back to you

#doctor who rp #doctor who roleplay #fandom roleplay #fandom rp

[i-am-binket]

Hello, SCPblr

I like to spend my freetime reading SCP files. I have just finished reading the 001 file for the third time(i didn't read all of them three times, they just keep adding more) and am currently reading through series VIII. I would like to share with you all some silly little thoughts i've had while reading:

SCP-7012, chaos you are my angel

I have no idea what the fuck I just read.

SCP-7013, Thirteen Indeed

I think we all know what this is.

The O5 council is a fucking joke

SCP-7014, Praise be Unto Thee, Oh Dice Gods

Your dnd dice are sentient

SCP-7018, The Long Winding Road

Landon said enby rights

Your Name is kyle literally fuck off

You just called them a pissbaby? and you're not on twitter?

SCP-7025, You Will be Killed by a Bus

You will be killed by a bus.

SCP-7028, The Poor Sisters of Divine Restoration

Thanks. /gen

(i don't remember what that last one was about tbh)

SCP-7035, Wonder Coast

Ahaa, i get it

SCP-7040, Confusion and Delay:

i like trains … *NYOOOM*

SCP-7046, Unwilling Blood

Yo, have the ghoul boys been here?👀

“We are currently living through the most desperate times in our universe” ah, yes, the 21st century.

#scp foundation #scp fandom #scp #let me know if you would like more #or not #ill probably do it anyway

[gfanz4ever]

I, an honourary enby parental influence, have recently discovered something distressing.

One of my kids recently asked if they could call me something other than Baba--they're thirteen and think it sounds kinda babyish, so naturally I said yes and asked what they had in mind. Trouble is, the kid has a Mama (Mom) and a Papa (Pops) at home, so they thought it only right to complete the set.

Hi, everybody. I'm Bob.

#happy pride u'all #pride month #lgbtq #enby #me

[just-let-me-see-accounts]

Alice in Wonderland scaffold 2

Key: [s] [S] = subject (eg they) [o] [O] = object (eg them) [pa] [Pa] = possessive adjective (eg their) [pp] [Pp] = possessive pronoun (eg theirs) [r] [R] = reflexive (eg themself)

Plain text version here (where I mark italics).

CHAPTER II. The Pool of Tears

“Curiouser and curiouser!” cried Alice ([s] was so much surprised, that for the moment [s] quite forgot how to speak good English); “now I’m opening out like the largest telescope that ever was! Good-bye, feet!” (for when [s] looked down at [pa] feet, they seemed to be almost out of sight, they were getting so far off). “Oh, my poor little feet, I wonder who will put on your shoes and stockings for you now, dears? I’m sure I shan’t be able! I shall be a great deal too far off to trouble myself about you: you must manage the best way you can;—but I must be kind to them,” thought Alice, “or perhaps they won’t walk the way I want to go! Let me see: I’ll give them a new pair of boots every Christmas.”

And [s] went on planning to [r] how [s] would manage it. “They must go by the carrier,” [s] thought; “and how funny it’ll seem, sending presents to one’s own feet! And how odd the directions will look!

   Alice’s Right Foot, Esq.,      Hearthrug,        near the Fender,          (with Alice’s love).

Oh dear, what nonsense I’m talking!”

Just then [pa] head struck against the roof of the hall: in fact [s] was now more than nine feet high, and [s] at once took up the little golden key and hurried off to the garden door.

Poor Alice! It was as much as [s] could do, lying down on one side, to look through into the garden with one eye; but to get through was more hopeless than ever: [s] sat down and began to cry again.

“You ought to be ashamed of yourself,” said Alice, “a great ****enby like you,” ([s] might well say this), “to go on crying in this way! Stop this moment, I tell you!” But [s] went on all the same, shedding gallons of tears, until there was a large pool all round [o], about four inches deep and reaching half down the hall.

After a time [s] heard a little pattering of feet in the distance, and [s] hastily dried [pa] eyes to see what was coming. It was the White Rabbit returning, splendidly dressed, with a pair of white kid gloves in one hand and a large fan in the other: he came trotting along in a great hurry, muttering to himself as he came, “Oh! the Duchess, the Duchess! Oh! won’t she be savage if I’ve kept her waiting!” Alice felt so desperate that [s] was ready to ask help of any one; so, when the Rabbit came near [o], [s] began, in a low, timid voice, “If you please, sir—” The Rabbit started violently, dropped the white kid gloves and the fan, and skurried away into the darkness as hard as he could go.

Alice took up the fan and gloves, and, as the hall was very hot, [s] kept fanning [r] all the time [s] went on talking: “Dear, dear! How queer everything is to-day! And yesterday things went on just as usual. I wonder if I’ve been changed in the night? Let me think: was I the same when I got up this morning? I almost think I can remember feeling a little different. But if I’m not the same, the next question is, Who in the world am I? Ah, that’s the great puzzle!” And [s] began thinking over all the children [s] knew that were of the same age as [r], to see if [s] could have been changed for any of them.

“I’m sure I’m not Ada,” [s] said, “for her hair goes in such long ringlets, and mine doesn’t go in ringlets at all; and I’m sure I can’t be Mabel, for I know all sorts of things, and she, oh! she knows such a very little! Besides, she’s she, and I’m I, and—oh dear, how puzzling it all is! I’ll try if I know all the things I used to know. Let me see: four times five is twelve, and four times six is thirteen, and four times seven is—oh dear! I shall never get to twenty at that rate! However, the Multiplication Table doesn’t signify: let’s try Geography. London is the capital of Paris, and Paris is the capital of Rome, and Rome—no, that’s all wrong, I’m certain! I must have been changed for Mabel! I’ll try and say ‘How doth the little—’” and [s] crossed [pa] hands on [pa] lap as if [s] were saying lessons, and began to repeat it, but [pa] voice sounded hoarse and strange, and the words did not come the same as they used to do:—

“How doth the little crocodile   Improve his shining tail, And pour the waters of the Nile   On every golden scale!

“How cheerfully he seems to grin,   How neatly spread his claws, And welcome little fishes in   With gently smiling jaws!”

“I’m sure those are not the right words,” said poor Alice, and [pa] eyes filled with tears again as [s] went on, “I must be Mabel after all, and I shall have to go and live in that poky little house, and have next to no toys to play with, and oh! ever so many lessons to learn! No, I’ve made up my mind about it; if I’m Mabel, I’ll stay down here! It’ll be no use their putting their heads down and saying ‘Come up again, dear!’ I shall only look up and say ‘Who am I then? Tell me that first, and then, if I like being that person, I’ll come up: if not, I’ll stay down here till I’m somebody else’—but, oh dear!” cried Alice, with a sudden burst of tears, “I do wish they would put their heads down! I am so very tired of being all alone here!”

As [s] said this [s] looked down at [pa] hands, and was surprised to see that [s] had put on one of the Rabbit’s little white kid gloves while [s] was talking. “How can I have done that?” [s] thought. “I must be growing small again.” [S] got up and went to the table to measure [r] by it, and found that, as nearly as [s] could guess, [s] was now about two feet high, and was going on shrinking rapidly: [s] soon found out that the cause of this was the fan [s] was holding, and [s] dropped it hastily, just in time to avoid shrinking away altogether.

“That was a narrow escape!” said Alice, a good deal frightened at the sudden change, but very glad to find [r] still in existence; “and now for the garden!” and [s] ran with all speed back to the little door: but, alas! the little door was shut again, and the little golden key was lying on the glass table as before, “and things are worse than ever,” thought the poor child, “for I never was so small as this before, never! And I declare it’s too bad, that it is!”

As [s] said these words [pa] foot slipped, and in another moment, splash! [s] was up to [pa] chin in salt water. [Pa] first idea was that [s] had somehow fallen into the sea, “and in that case I can go back by railway,” [s] said to [r]. (Alice had been to the seaside once in [pa] life, and had come to the general conclusion, that wherever you go to on the English coast you find a number of bathing machines in the sea, some children digging in the sand with wooden spades, then a row of lodging houses, and behind them a railway station.) However, [s] soon made out that [s] was in the pool of tears which [s] had wept when [s] was nine feet high.

“I wish I hadn’t cried so much!” said Alice, as [s] swam about, trying to find [pa] way out. “I shall be punished for it now, I suppose, by being drowned in my own tears! That will be a queer thing, to be sure! However, everything is queer to-day.”

Just then [s] heard something splashing about in the pool a little way off, and [s] swam nearer to make out what it was: at first [s] thought it must be a walrus or hippopotamus, but then [s] remembered how small [s] was now, and [s] soon made out that it was only a mouse that had slipped in like [r].

“Would it be of any use, now,” thought Alice, “to speak to this mouse? Everything is so out-of-the-way down here, that I should think very likely it can talk: at any rate, there’s no harm in trying.” So [s] began: “O Mouse, do you know the way out of this pool? I am very tired of swimming about here, O Mouse!” (Alice thought this must be the right way of speaking to a mouse: [s] had never done such a thing before, but [s] remembered having seen in [pa] brother’s Latin Grammar, “A mouse—of a mouse—to a mouse—a mouse—O mouse!”) The Mouse looked at [o] rather inquisitively, and seemed to [o] to wink with one of its little eyes, but it said nothing.

“Perhaps it doesn’t understand English,” thought Alice; “I daresay it’s a French mouse, come over with William the Conqueror.” (For, with all [pa] knowledge of history, Alice had no very clear notion how long ago anything had happened.) So [s] began again: “Où est ma chatte?” which was the first sentence in [pa] French lesson-book. The Mouse gave a sudden leap out of the water, and seemed to quiver all over with fright. “Oh, I beg your pardon!” cried Alice hastily, afraid that [s] had hurt the poor animal’s feelings. “I quite forgot you didn’t like cats.”

“Not like cats!” cried the Mouse, in a shrill, passionate voice. “Would you like cats if you were me?”

“Well, perhaps not,” said Alice in a soothing tone: “don’t be angry about it. And yet I wish I could show you our cat Dinah: I think you’d take a fancy to cats if you could only see her. She is such a dear quiet thing,” Alice went on, half to [r], as [s] swam lazily about in the pool, “and she sits purring so nicely by the fire, licking her paws and washing her face—and she is such a nice soft thing to nurse—and she’s such a capital one for catching mice—oh, I beg your pardon!” cried Alice again, for this time the Mouse was bristling all over, and [s] felt certain it must be really offended. “We won’t talk about her any more if you’d rather not.”

“We indeed!” cried the Mouse, who was trembling down to the end of his tail. “As if I would talk on such a subject! Our family always hated cats: nasty, low, vulgar things! Don’t let me hear the name again!”

“I won’t indeed!” said Alice, in a great hurry to change the subject of conversation. “Are you—are you fond—of—of dogs?” The Mouse did not answer, so Alice went on eagerly: “There is such a nice little dog near our house I should like to show you! A little bright-eyed terrier, you know, with oh, such long curly brown hair! And it’ll fetch things when you throw them, and it’ll sit up and beg for its dinner, and all sorts of things—I can’t remember half of them—and it belongs to a farmer, you know, and he says it’s so useful, it’s worth a hundred pounds! He says it kills all the rats and—oh dear!” cried Alice in a sorrowful tone, “I’m afraid I’ve offended it again!” For the Mouse was swimming away from [o] as hard as it could go, and making quite a commotion in the pool as it went.

So [s] called softly after it, “Mouse dear! Do come back again, and we won’t talk about cats or dogs either, if you don’t like them!” When the Mouse heard this, it turned round and swam slowly back to [o]: its face was quite pale (with passion, Alice thought), and it said in a low trembling voice, “Let us get to the shore, and then I’ll tell you my history, and you’ll understand why it is I hate cats and dogs.”

It was high time to go, for the pool was getting quite crowded with the birds and animals that had fallen into it: there were a Duck and a Dodo, a Lory and an Eaglet, and several other curious creatures. Alice led the way, and the whole party swam to the shore.

****girl

———————————————————-

Alice in Wonderland available via Project Gutenberg.

Previous | Index | Next

AiW pronoun Masterpost

#aiw #scaffold

[rsmrymnt-tea]

Throwing hands with Solmare if they make the female presenting character a rival or enemy

And honestly…. Rivals??? When almost every single character is already head over heels for MC in main story???

And when we can’t even date any of them ourselves with how the game is structured?????

#obey me #just codes as something unpleasant to me #can we not do that #can we just be besties #lovers #this is a comment on solmare and how much i do not want these two enbys to be pitted against each other #well not two enbys more like one enby and one gender unspecified character #you can do soooooo much more interesting stuff than be romantic rivals #and even then if theyre gonna make thirteen a rival why not the middle guy too #not the guy on the right tho thats weird

[song-tam]

South Indian!Biana Having A Half Sari Function

A/N: Let me self project with cultural headcanons thank you very much... even though I don’t remember much from my own function from years ago agh—for the record, basically what a half sari function is a South Indian tradition for females after they get their first menstrual cycle to have this big momentous event where they wear a half sari and people bless them. According to tradition, they’ll wear half saris to all formal functions afterward, until their wedding, where they wear a full sari for the first time.

Anyway in this AU the Neverseen don’t exist

And they are ~human~

Biana was thirteen years old when they hosted the half sari function

And she was excited

She’d gone to plenty of her family member’s half sari function (shh let’s pretend all the vackers are south indian okay)

Because finally it was her turn

The days leading up to her half sari function were hectic

Biana went to an insane amount of dress fittings

She also had to take a bunch of pictures

Those were all pretty boring, for the most part

Getting henna done was actually pretty fun, though

The henna covered her hands and forearms

She also got it done on her feet

Waiting for it to dry was a pain, though, since she couldn’t really move

And also she had to fight the urge not to peel it off

She’d gotten her cousins to get henna done with her so at least she had a distraction

Getting makeup done was also a long time of sitting still

AND THEN she had to fit into another lehnga for the first part of the ceremony

Finally, when the second part of the ceremony began, Biana could fit into her actual half sari

But of course there had to be a lot of pictures

Like... a LOT of pictures

Even more than when she was just in her lehnga during the first half

Everyone had to line up and take pictures and then bless her

The whole situation would be taking hours, she was told

Fitz kept cackling at Biana’s scowl

He still had to be in a lot of photos as her brother

There were a lot of family pictures involved

But for the most part it was Biana and the guests

After all the elders and the adults blessed her would Biana be taking photos with her friends

Keefe would not stop posing

He did all the faces and acted like he was on Project Runway

Marella basically did the same thing

Sophie mostly hid in the photos

Dex just. grinned.

Tam and Stina looked like they wanted to be anywhere else apart from all the people but at least they gave Biana their best wishes

Linh was very very excited about the whole thing

Wylie was the only one who was actually normal

Eventually Fitz pulled them all away to go eat

The buffet had all the food

Biana had wanted to try all her favorite dishes *cough* gobi manchurian *cough*

But no

She still had pictures to take :/

Fitz promised to have the chefs save some of the food for her

He’d been to plenty of half sari functions and he knew how fast the food ran out

Tbh Keefe were the ones eating most of the food

He was having a field day at the buffet

Not that his white people taste buds could actually handle that much spice lmao

His tongues were on fire after a single taste of REAL chili chicken

”THIS ISN’T WHAT I HAD AT YOUR HOUSE FITZ”

“Keefe, we lowered the spice levels accordingly for you.”

Fitzy had the chefs make Keefe mild *cough* bland *cough* dishes when they were cooking another round

Marella went and got henna done

She ended up roping Sophie into it

“It’s so pretty and Biana told us both to go talk to the henna artist.”

”But I want to try the gulab jamun—”

”Not now!”

Linh was the one who ate all the gulab jamun by the time their henna dried

Stina ended up having beef against Gossipy Desi Aunties

They started being all judgy and then Stina absolutely threw hands

Gossipy Desi Aunties left early (much to Della and Fitz’s delight)

Stina is now an honorary Vacker

Wylie somehow ended up at a table with the Tired Indian Uncles

They were discussing cricket

Wylie had never watched a cricket match but acted like he knew what they were talking about

All in all the situation was very awkward for him

He asked Fitz later why the Tired Indian Uncles were so... well, tired

Fitz didn’’t really have an answer

”Desi uncles are just like that, who knows why.”

(also for the record, in ~brown culture~ we’re just supposed to call adults “uncle” and “auntie” idk why—)

Tam and Dex went off and did A Thing for Biana

And by that it meant that they went searching to go find something that worked as an adequate present since they didn’t realize they had to bring her one

(even though actually presents weren’t really necessary, that was only something the adults did—)

They ended up building her a tower out of plastic forks

Biana still keeps it in her room to this day

She did not get to try her gobi manchurian, for the record

Because of all the photos she had to keep taking

She did end up getting to eat some of the jalebi that Fitzy and the chefs saved for her though

And she had pretty henna to show for her half sari function

So for the record it was half okay

Though she was very happy when she could finally change out of the half sari because as pretty as it was the jewelry was really weighing down on her

Biana took a nice long nap afterwards

With Linh’s cat Princess Purryfins for company

Taglist: @the-whispers-of-moonlight @only-one-right-path @raiinyrxse @completekeefitztrash @cvey @bianavacker-is-bi-as-hell @neo-neo-neo @enbies-and-felonies @theobliviouswhale @real-smooth @dreaminq-out-loud @sunset-telepath @fire-sapphics @an-absolute-travesty @turquoise-skyyyy @steppingonshatteredglass @stardustanddaffodils

#kotlc #keeper of the lost cities #kotlc headcanons #keeper of the lost cities headcanons #fanfiction #fanfic #kotlc fanfiction #keeper of the lost cities fanfiction #biana vacker #fitz vacker #della vacker #dex dizznee #sophie foster #marella redek #linh song #tam song #keefe sencen #biana kotlc #biana vacker headcanons #headcanons #desi #desi headcanons #desi biana vacker #indian #cultural #cultural headcanons

[an-absolute-travesty]

Royal Screw Ups Side Stories 2: Wedding Redux

Happy last day of pride my friends, all month I’ve been working on this in celebration!

Important note: If you haven’t read RSU you really won’t know what’s going on. Its the very first thing linked in my masterlist :)

Warnings: caps, swearing, death references/recovered grief 

Those warnings are very misleading this is very fluff heavy dw

About: keefex royalty au

Pairings: keefex, sophiana

Word count: 8.3k

Tag list (let me know if you want to be added or removed): @catboyruy @percabetn @sewersewersewercouch @everyonehasthoughts @imaramennoodle @enbies-and-felonies @blxckh0les42 @rainbowtay-11 @callas-starkflower-stew @impostertamsong @appalyneinstitute1 @stars-and-splendor @anna-without-an-e @mistythegenderqueermess @we-have-no-bananas-today @we-wont-dissapear @jadenightthewriter@cadence-talle @ruewen-and-rising @lemontarto @a-lonely-tatertot

Keefe sat at his desk, unable to stop the movement of his foot.

Tap

Tap

Tap

Tap

Tap

Tap

Gosh, he was anxious.

Tap

Tap

Tap

Tap

Tap

Tap

Maybe he should make some tea, that would help his nerves.

Tap

Tap

Tap

Tap

Tap

Tap

No it wouldn't, he was too anxious.

Tonight was the night. Like the night. The night he would... would... the thought made him too sick to think.

Not in a bad way! In like a really, really, good way, but still a bad way because there was the chance of it all going wrong.

A slim chance, he reminded himself. He loved Dex and Dex loved him back, they'd been loving and loving the other back for ten years, if Dex ran away now that'd be really... just- lame of him.

He upgraded his tapping to pacing.

They were to meet tonight at midnight, Keefe told Dex it was for a late-night picnic and that he had been so busy running the country and such that it was the only time he could get away.

A lie. Or a pseudo lie, as he would have been busy, but he trusted the councillors enough to take over for the day so he could prepare. It wouldn't be much different than usual for them, they just wouldn't have an easy tie-proof amount of votes. Twelve running the kingdom instead of thirteen. Oh, goodness, how could they ever survive without that little wax seal at the bottom that gave the king's approval.

At one point, a day when the king didn't work really would spell chaos for the kingdom (which meant there were quite a few days of chaos with Cassius in the big chair) but Keefe had been more sensible and decided the council should have a bit more say in things and should be able to vote against or with the king, rather than have to jump through a multitude of legal loopholes to challenge his decisions. Also, council members were now voted on by the common people, but Oralie and Bronte had managed to stay on the Council for the last ten years, as they were highly beloved by the public.

Before Keefe knew it, the clock tower struck eleven chimes. It was time to prepare.

He walked quickly through the dark castle, trying not to look at the ever-staring portraits of his ancestors that lined the halls, also trying to avoid the chance of running into his partner, who could be roaming the place at any time.

As he passed the kitchens, he hurried in to pick up his pre-prepared basket of food before exiting via the servants' door.

He slowed as he walked across the lawn, eventually reaching the Queen's Garden, as it was still called. He no longer had to climb over a wall, they had made an archway door to temporarily give entrance until they could knock the barrier down all together.

He carefully laid out the blanket next to the pond they had sat by on their first trip out here, and many more after that. He sat the basket of food atop it and started setting out the various baked goods, sandwiches, and fruits inside.

He heard the clock strike twelve and knew Dex would be coming soon.

He was right, as he looked over the horizon he saw Dex approach, outlined in the light of the moon.

Keefe walked up to Dex and as he bowed with great flourish, said, "Your picnic awaits."

Dex laughed, taking hold of the arm Keefe offered to walk them to their spot.

"How romantic," He commented sincerely, looking at the setup.

"Thank you, thank you, took a whole five minutes of thinking to come up with this idea, a true challenge for me."

Dex laughed again. Wow, he loved it when he laughed.

Keefe sat down and, with a pat, invited Dex to join him, which he did.

They sat in a comfortable silence as they ate, Keefe's right arm around Dex's shoulders.

At some point, Keefe began simply staring at Dex in the moonlight. He remembered doing this when they were teens, to escape from the world and the stress and everything else. His old sketchbooks were filled with drawings of Dex in the garden, special snapshots he was sure to remember. There was this one he would stare back at all the time, Dex with his head pointed up to the sky, the stars reflected in his eyes, drawn in graphite, though it was in vivid color in Keefe's memory. He would stare at it any time he couldn't actually be with the boy, which was quite a bit as a too-young king.

Of course, they weren't boys anymore.

Keefe noted the changes since they were kids, Dex's face had gone from boyish and round to a triangle-ish jaw with a light coating of peach fuzz he had yet to shave. Something that hadn't changed was that there was still always a smudge of some kind of dirt or oil across his nose or cheek, Keefe had stopped trying to wipe it off a long time ago, it always showed back up.

He supposed they were still just boys, in a way.

Especially considering Keefe was just as scared to pop the question as he was asking Dex to officially be his boyfriend all those years ago.

After a few more minutes of procrastination, he worked up the courage.

"H-Hey, Dex?'

"Hm?"

"I want to ask you a question."

"Shoot."

"I- um- shit I forgot what I was gonna say, where'd I put my cue cards?"

Keefe began patting his pockets as Dex chuckled. Yeah, the stuttering bit was a lie, he knew exactly what he planned to say but chickened out last minute. Also, he didn't have cue cards. Maybe he should have had cue cards.

"Eh, fuck it," Keefe said. He got onto one knee. "Dex Dizznee, would you please consider marrying me, because I like you a whole lot and I have a feeling it's mutual."

Here he pulled out the simple golden band from his pocket and offered it to Dex.

"I- I mean hell yeah!" Dex said with another laugh, putting out his left hand for the ring to be slipped onto.

"Thank goodness, that'd be really embarrassing if you-"

Keefe was cut off by Dex suddenly grabbing the collar of his shirt and kissing him.

"Sometimes you can talk less, you know."

"Why should I? My shining personality is one of my best features," Keefe said with a smirk.

"Oh, hush, you aren't fooling anyone. It doesn't take an empath to realize you've been a nervous wreck all night."

"That obvious, huh?"

"I read you like a book, my love," Dex said, laying back on the blanket.

"So, you knew?"

"Well... you did invite me to a midnight picnic in the spot we would sneak out to as kids and you've been 'busy' all week, so you could say I had a hunch."

"I tried?"

"Yes, Love, you did a great job. I couldn't be happier."

"Good. That's my whole goal."

"Funny, making you happy is mine!"

Keefe laughed and pulled Dex's face in for another kiss.

"I love you," Keefe muttered after they broke away.

"I love you, too."

~*~

"Okay, so the roses can go over here-" Dex started.

"Wait, I thought we were putting the roses by the reception tables?"

"Yeah, but wouldn't the entrance be better so people don't get poked by the thorns?"

"You're the expert, how long would it take to de-thorn a bunch of roses?" Keefe asked.

"Too long."

"Ugh."

Wedding planning wasn't exactly the sweet little romantic endeavor Keefe expected it to be. In fact, it was so stressful he was worried his ears were going to get prematurely pointy.

Normally weddings would be planned by professionals or servants, but even though same-sex marriage had been legalized (one of Keefe's first acts as king, and a controversial one at that), it was still discriminated against quite heavily. Keefe figured he should probably ease his people into the fact that he wasn't the straightest... straightest... nail in the coffin? Whatever, metaphors are overrated, he decided. The point was, ten years into his reign wasn't enough to be confident his people wouldn't revolt if they knew his preferences.

Of course there were rumors, mostly contained within the castle itself as many found it odd he was so close to a "servant man" but rumors are impossible to prevent, as his mother always said, so Keefe had stopped trying.

Keefe sat back, frustrated.

"Can we work on something simpler?" he said.

"Alright, how about the invites?" Dex offered.

"Hm. Sounds worse, let's try."

Dex chuckled.

"Okay, start writing the names down to remember and I'll list them off."

"Ready," Keefe said, picking up a pen.

"Uh... Sophie and Biana, Fitz and Tam, Linh and Marella, Stina and Maruca-"

Keefe made a noise of frustration at the last names.

"I know, we have to invite them though, she's your cousin and... cousin-in-law, I guess."

"Yeah, yeah. Keep going."

"Wylie and his dads. Elwin and his partner. Oh, and then my parents and siblings and the like, all the rest of the Ruewens, that's about it on my family, I think."

"What about all the Dizznee uncles and aunts?"

"Way too many, we'll just do the Ruewen side to be safe. Oh yeah, and how could I forget Bronte and Oralie?"

"Woo, that'll be fun with Sophie."

Sophie had told them and the rest of their friends her full "weirdness" about her biological parents and the like. Sophie and Oralie were still on rocky ground, but they could normally be in the same room without a fight starting.

"Oh and Amy!" Keefe realized, "We have to have Amy there, who else will get too drunk to stand and fall into the pond?"

"Of course, of course, although I'm pretty sure Marella will do that too. Anyone else?"

"Uh... do we want to start a fight?" Keefe asked hesitantly.

"Normally no, but keep going."

"In theory, we could invite Cassius."

There were many of those impossible to avoid rumors in reference to Cassius' location in the few years after his disappearance, but they had been confirmed about 2 years ago. Someone had spotted him in a mega-private vacation town for the highly wealthy somewhere up a mountain around Gildingham.

Dex sucked a bunch of air in through his teeth, making a pained noise.

"I know, I know, it's a bad idea," Keefe said.

"Yeah, you said start a fight, not cause a hate crime," Dex said lightheartedly.

"It'd be nice to see him mad, though."

"It would, but it's not worth it, Love."

Keefe sat up straighter (hah), satisfied.

"Alright then, I suppose that's everyone."

"Suppose so."

Dex glanced up at the clock that sat upon the hearth of the unlit fireplace in the castle's family living room.

"I have to get going, I have that meeting with all the rest of the servant overseers at four. They still aren't giving their workers long enough for breaks."

"Okay, good luck, Dear."

"Thank you, Love."

Dex quickly pecked him on the cheek before leaving the room.

Keefe sat there a few minutes longer, trying to put off what he knew would be an inevitable argument with Bronte about not coming to enough of the council meetings, but after a few more moments of procrastination, decided to get it over with.

~*~

"KEEFE SENCEN."

"Oh, boy."

"YOU MAY BE THE KING BUT I HAVE BEEN ASSISTING IN RUNNING THIS KINGDOM SINCE FAR BEFORE YOU WERE BORN AND I WILL NOT STAND FOR THIS ABSOLUTELY DISGRACEFUL-"

Bronte would have continued to yell at Keefe if it wasn't for Oralie walking into the conference room and giving a stare that could terrify the most battle hardened knights.

Bronte (who was almost a foot shorter than Keefe) lowered himself from the tips of his toes and took his wagging finger from Keefe's face.

"Hello, Oralie. I was just explaining to our young king here why we shall no longer tolerate the negligence of his duties."

"Yes, I heard from down the hall. I was just coming in here to make sure you don't commit regicide."

"If I managed a couple centuries of Cassius I can handle a decade of Keefe without murder, however, I have gotten close."

"Wow, thanks for the support. I'll make sure to lock my door tonight," Keefe muttered.

Everyone ignored him.

"So," Oralie started, "perhaps we can reason with each other without yelling so loudly you'll wake the dead. Keefe, dear, may I respectfully ask why you haven't been attending meetings?"

At "respectfully" she threw a pointed glance at Bronte.

"Well... I... um... I'm not sure I should fully disclose at this moment."

Bronte looked like his head was going to explode, but before he could say anything else, Oralie began to speak.

"Well, in the last ten years you have barely taken breaks and have been extremely diligent and kind so, frankly, Bronte, I do not see the reason you are so upset. I'm sure Keefe has a good reason."

"Yes, Keefe, and what is that reason exactly?" Bronte said with venom dripping from his voice.

Oralie's expression seem to say, "Just say it and get it over with."

Bronte's said, "I wish I had convinced your mother to put you up for adoption."

"Well-" Keefe sighed, "I guess I can tell you, but you're going to have to keep it a secret. We haven't told anyone else yet, it was meant to be a surprise."

"We?" Bronte questioned.

Oralie and Bronte both knew about Dex, they were his closest confidants -- even through Bronte's intense criticisms of him (or perhaps because of them) -- and it would only hurt to keep that sort of thing from them. They were supportive, they both voted yes for same-sex marriage and Keefe had his suspicions about their own preferences, but he knew that fact wouldn't save him from the wrath of Bronte.

"Yes, we. Dex and I are to be married."

Oralie made a sound of extreme joy that sounded a bit like a creaky door hinge.

"Oh my goodness! Why didn't you tell us earlier? We could've excused you for a whole month-"

"That's a bit excessive," Bronte cut in.

Oralie ignored him.

"Are we invited? Do you need help planning? I don't have much experience, to be honest, but I could try to help with-"

She was cut off again, this time by Keefe.

"Yes, you're invited, but otherwise we want to keep this on the low. We don't want a big wedding."

"Not after the first time," Bronte muttered.

"Exactly. We're planning it ourselves, and that's the reason for my absence."

"No excuse, plenty of kings have had weddings and have continued to rule," Bronte commented.

"Well, those kings also weren't planning it all by themselves while keeping the secret of their homosexuality to the world and hiding an entire fiancé. They also didn't have a council of trustworthy members working to run the country smoothly, and were attempting to do it all on their lonesome."

"Buttering us up won't work."

"Works for me," Oralie said with a smug grin. "Enjoy your wedding planning. We will be right on our way out and pestering you no longer."

She proceeded to grab Bronte's arm in a way he would only let someone he had been working with for centuries, and led him out of the room, still slightly fuming.

In that moment, Keefe was very glad Bronte wasn't a pyrokinetic.

~*~

"Hey Dex?"

"Hm?" He muttered, looking up from whatever device he was working on. It seemed like an improved version of the fire starter he had used when they first met.

"I just realized something."

"What's that?"

"I never asked your dad permission to marry you."

Dex chuckled.

"Well, I'm pretty sure he approves, I don't think you have to. Besides, it's a bit archaic anyway."

"Yeah, but it feels right, y'know?"

"I mean, go for it," Dex said with a shrug, returning to his tinkering.

"I will," Keefe said decidedly. "He's going to give me so much damn permission that he'll beg us to get married right on the spot."

~*~

Despite his previous confidence, Keefe was feeling extremely nervous as he stood in front of the Dizznee family house.

He knew Kesler would give his permission, but it was still a bit nerve wracking to stand in front of your in-laws and tell them you wanted to marry their son.

Keefe took a second to remind himself that he was the literal king and had no reason to be nervous before knocking on the door.

He tried to wear that kingly confidence as Juline opened the door.

"Oh, hello Keefe! Come on in. Perfect timing, there's some mallowmelt in the oven right now. What brings you?"

"I came to talk to you and Kesler, if you don't mind."

"Of course, let me go get him, he's off in his workshop messing around. Make yourself comfortable."

Keefe sat down on the couch in their main room.

The Dizznees weren't servants anymore, Keefe claimed to "recognize Kesler's talents" and put him in charge of making the medicine Elwin, Biana, and newer hire Livvy used in the infirmary (the people of the castle hadn't been healthier since). This gig provided Juline and Kesler with a nice house just outside of castle grounds. Well, both Kesler's job and Juline's new job, she had moved on from working in the castle kitchens and had her own bakery in the city.

As Juline walked back into the room with a Kesler covered in soot in tow, Keefe realized his leg was bouncing and made himself stop.

"So, what's up, Blondie?" Kesler asked, wiping grease from his hands on a towel that hung from his belt.

Keefe stood up.

"I- uh- well," he sighed, "I want to ask your permission to marry Dex, but also I already proposed so if you say no that'd be pretty awk-"

"OF COURSE!" Juline nearly yelled.

"Yes, yes, full permission," Kesler said, wide smile on his face. "I mean, honestly, it took you long enough."

"We were both just busy, was all," Keefe said, looking down, a bit embarrassed that he thought the Dizznees would even consider denying the request.

"Another thing," Keefe said, looking back up.

"Hm?" Juline questioned.

"Well, it's traditional to take the name of the higher standing person in the relationship, but we aren't fans of tradition and 'Dex Sencen' doesn't have the same ring as 'Keefe Dizznee', in our opinion. What are your thoughts?"

Both of Dex's parents looked damn near tears.

Keefe was afraid he didn't sell it well enough and cut back in, "I-it couldn't be an immediate change, the wedding will need to be a secret because we don't want a riot on our hands and-"

Juline rushed forward and cut him off with a hug, Kesler joining in right after.

"Of course you can take our name, Blondie."

"Thank you, Mr. Dizznee."

"Call me Dad."

~*~

"Ok, how are the flowers looking?"

"Doing well, I found a variety of roses without thorns."

"Awesome."

"On your side of things, are the invites ready?"

"Painted and prepared to send out."

Keefe and Dex sat in the castle library, preparing, as they had at every opportunity for the last few weeks.

Between Keefe's responsibilities as the king and Dex's as the head supervisor of the garden and agriculture servants, plus being on the ground making sure the servants were being treated fairly, they didn't have much time to meet up. They found little ways around it though, as they always had. Meeting at night or in their scant breaks.

"Anything else?" Keefe asked.

"Uh... don't think so. We have the place, the time, the people, the food... I think we're ready."

Keefe cracked a smile.

"Alright then. At the end of this month, we shall be wed!" He said, with a horrible imitation of an exaggerated posh accent and a flourish of his hands.

Dex laughed.

"You're such a weirdo."

"Oh! It will be a spring wedding!" He continued with the bad accent, standing up and reaching down to grab Dex's hands and pull him into a dance, circling around their various planning materials on the ground as if they were playing ring-around-the-rosie.

Dex kept laughing as he pulled them into a stop.

"We both need so much sleep," He said with a chuckle, rubbing his eyes.

That was true, the grandfather clock read almost 3:30 a.m.

"Okay, okay," Keefe gave in, "Yes, let's go sleep for the total 2 hours we have before it's time to wake up, it'll certainly help so much," he said with sarcasm.

"Better than nothing, last one to the room has to make the bed tomorrow."

"Bet!"

~*~

The day the invites were sent, just one hour later, there was a knock at Keefe's office door.

Before he could open it, it was practically kicked opened by a familiar pair of women.

"AH! WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL US SOONER!" screamed Biana.

Sophie looked mildly embarrassed at her girlfriend's outburst from behind her.

"Sorry! Sorry! Don't kill me!" Keefe said, putting his hands up and using his desk as a shield.

The wrath of Biana was much scarier than the wrath of Bronte.

Luckily, she wasn't actually in a murderous rage and rounded the desk to hug Keefe.

"Keefe, I've literally never been happier in my life, when did this happen?" Biana asked, shaking Keefe by the shoulders.

Sophie didn't seem to take offense at the "never been happier in my life" comment, but it felt like she should.

"Well, I'm glad my relationship gives you so much joy, for whatever reason. We got engaged last month, we didn't want to tell everyone immediately, because well, this."

Biana let go of his shoulders and put her hands up like she was the most innocent person in the world.

Keefe turned his head towards the still open door and saw Fitz running towards it like a mad man.

Guess he'd be feeling the wrath of both the Vackers today.

He slid to a stop right before almost crashing into Keefe's desk, he noticed Fitz still had his Royal Guard uniform on.

"They beat me here?" He asked, breathless.

"Yep."

"Damn. Already went through the 'Why didn't you tell us sooner?' thing?"

"Yep."

"Okay, I'll skip to the practical. How the hell are you going to pull this off with no one finding out?"

"Same way we pulled off everything else with no one finding out," Keefe said, shrugging as if the last time they- er- "planned" a wedding it was the simplest, easiest thing in the world.

"What I'm hearing is that you're going to need our help again," said Sophie from the door frame.

"You're hearing right. Mind gathering some people for me?"

~*~

One week later, Keefe sat with a multitude of familiar faces in their old spots.

Their exact old spots, he noticed. Marella sat on a love seat, Linh by her feet, getting her hair played with. Sophie took up the corner seat just behind Biana. Dex sat on the couch just to the side of where Keefe's seat was right in front of the fireplace, Fitz and Tam right in front of him. Maruca and Stina in the opposite corner of Sophie, as though they were still gossiping teens. Wylie floating around, never in a seat for more than 10 minutes at a time.

"So," Keefe started, standing up. "—we made a wedding go wrong once, you think we could make one go right, too?'

Marella raised her hand.

"Will arson be involved again?"

"I doubt it, but I love the spirit!" Keefe said excitedly. Laughter filled the room.

Dex stood up.

"We've assigned everyone a responsibility, tell us if you aren't okay with yours and we'll adjust, but... we're pretty sure you're gonna like them."

Keefe passed out everyone's papers with their respective assignments on them, they confirmed their acceptance (Marella seemed particularly excited), and they quickly scattered from the area, as to not gain suspicion.

That is, everyone but Sophie.

"Hey, can I talk to you guys?" she asked, after everyone else had left the library.

"No, you cannot," Keefe said sarcastically.

"Of course," Dex said.

She nodded before turning around and walking all over the room, frantically waving her arms around, apparently finding nothing.

"Sorry, had to make sure she wasn't still in here. She's getting suspicious of me."

Keefe and Dex gave each other a quick look that said, "What the hell?" before turning back to Sophie.

"I want to propose to Biana. This is a no-pressure request, but with the wedding coming I was... I was wondering if I could do it there?"

Keefe's face broke out in a huge smile.

"Absolutely! If it's good with Dex, I mean. It's absolutely good with me."

Dex smiled too.

"Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. 1,000%, totally yes."

"Thank goodness," Sophie said with a sigh, "You have no idea how nervous I was to ask."

"What'd you think we were gonna say?" Keefe asked with a laugh, "No, Sophie, our friend of years, cousin, and soon to be cousin-in-law. You are now banished from the kingdom forever. You may escape tonight at midnight by alicorn back."

"Who knows! You could've. I have to go back now, Bi says if I procrastinate hosting the Vackers at our house anymore this week she'd send me to Havenfield and tell Eda and Grady I needed to clean Verdi's cage. Normally I'd have bitten the bullet and hosted already, it's just there's so many of them."

"Good luck, soldier," Keefe said with a salute, "I'm afraid the king won't be making an appearance to that particular family dinner."

The Vacker family could be a nightmare sometimes, he already had to deal with a lot of them because of their high political status, and most of them still saw Keefe as that little prince friend of their nephew.

Sophie sighed before squaring up her shoulders and exiting to go deal with the most hard-headed family that side of the continent. Internally, Keefe thanked goodness he didn't have to marry a Vacker and deal with all of that.

~*~

This was it.

The night before the wedding.

Well, the night before the night of the wedding. If having it in daytime was an option, they would've taken it, but there was too much of a possibility of there being witnesses. Keefe hoped none of the guards noticed that no one had been scheduled for duty on the west wing of the castle or the lawns.

Just as Keefe laid down in his -- cold and empty -- bed, he heard a knock at the window.

Peering over, he saw the face of his fiancé staring through with a wide smile.

A few years ago, they installed a ladder up to Keefe's room (covered in ivy as a disguise) for Dex to say goodnight on nights where sleeping in the same room wasn't an option.

Granted, with their separate areas of work and secrecy of their relationship, that was most nights.

Keefe walked over to the window and opened it, Dex nearly tumbling through before bracing himself on the sill.

"I don't have much time," Dex explained as he shifted to sitting on the sill. "I have to get up way early tomorrow for a meeting they wouldn't let me reschedule. I just couldn't help myself, I had to come see you, I guess," he said with a chuckle.

Keefe smiled, wrapping his arms around his lover in the window, steadying him and making sure he didn't fall backwards, Dex bracing himself on Keefe's shoulders.

Keefe looked up into Dex's eyes, the most perfect shade of periwinkle blue, they were his favorite color. The idea of looking into those eyes for the rest of forever put butterflies in his stomach and made him feel like a little kid again. They had never quite gotten out of the honeymoon phase of their relationship, after the rose colored glasses faded away, Keefe had found a just-as-amazing man underneath.

"I love you," Keefe said unprompted, not able to contain his thoughts.

"I love you, too," Dex replied, a crooked smile still playing at his rough lips.

"... And that is why you need to go and get some sleep for tomorrow. It's gonna be a long day."

Dex rolled his eyes.

"Oh, come on, you hypocrite. I've seen you go to important interspecial meetings on two hours before."

"Well, yes, but that was me, and you are you, so, naturally, there's a difference."

"Sweetheart, you're a king."

"Exactly! Just another dirty politician! But you? The backbone of the management of the castle? Ensuring each and every servant gets a warm bed and a table full of food each night? Now that is a man that needs a full eight hours."

Dex laughed again, the sweetest sound in the world to Keefe's ears.

He leaned forward, placing his head on Keefe's shoulder and pushing his face towards his neck, taking a deep breath in as if in preparation.

"I'm scared," he said quietly, like it was a secret.

Keefe pulled back a little, prompting Dex to look up so he could view his face.

"About the wedding?" Keefe asked, just as quietly.

Dex nodded hesitantly.

Keefe shrugged.

"I think we're all a little scared. I mean, destroying the last one went pretty smooth. Making one go right seems like it should be easier, but it feels harder."

Dex nodded.

"It's also easier when your only job is throwing what was more or less a fancy firework."

"It was a pretty impressive fancy firework."

"I could do better," Dex said, Keefe could practically see the gears turning in his head of how he could improve on his previous bomb design.

"Well, we don't need fireworks or bombs for tomorrow, so don't worry about that," Keefe said to cut off Dex's possibly explosive ideas.

"But you know what we do need for tomorrow?" Keefe asked, pulling in Dex's attention.

"Hm?"

"You to be awake for the ceremony. So, please, go get some rest."

Dex sighed.

"As you wish."

With a quick kiss on the forehead, Dex turned around on his perch and climbed down the ladder, leaving Keefe to attempt to get some sleep in his own room. Although, Keefe wished Dex could stay in his. One day they would be able to, when the public was more accepting. Perhaps even then they'd have a second, more typical royal wedding. But for now, their midnight garden rendezvous would have to do.

~*~

At exactly 11:05 pm, Keefe began to get ready.

He knew it was exactly 11:05 because he had been watching the clock closer than a little kid on the last day of school before break.

As he struggled to fool with the various buttons on his annoyingly complicated dress coat, he heard a knock at the door.

He cracked the door open, just barely sticking his head out in case it was a nosy servant or something. Luckily, no nosy servants were to be found, and it was merely Elwin at his door.

"I thought I'd swing by," he said, "wanted to make sure you were able to put your pants on by yourself. Figured someone else probably always did it for you."

"Haha, funny," Keefe replied dryly. "But um... I am struggling with my coat."

Elwin chuckled before Keefe further opened the door as an invitation into the room. Elwin began straightening the coat, which Keefe had apparently managed to put on inside out.

"So, how're you feeling?" Elwin asked, still fussing with the devil coat.

"Nervous. Excited. Nervou-cited, I guess."

"Understandable, Huz and I felt about the same."

Huz was Elwin's partner, apparently of quote unquote "A long goddamn time" according to Livvy. He was some kind of doctor too. Keefe didn't know he existed until he was invited to their wedding almost immediately after it was legal.

"And... you're all set!" Elwin said, backing up and looking at the now correctly fastened coat.

"Thanks," Keefe replied, turning around to inspect himself in the mirror. Indeed, the coat looked much more correct now.

Did he have it upside down before?

His confusion was interrupted by Elwin.

"Better?"

"Way," Keefe confirmed.

"Good. I better get going, I need to get ready myself. Tell me if you need any more help, kiddo."

"Thank you, again. I appreciate it. You've always been like a father to the whole castle."

Elwin smiled and looked like he was tearing up a bit before ruffling Keefe's hair.

"Good luck," he said, then leaving the room for Keefe to finish getting ready.

~*~

Their "venue" was beautiful.

Keefe had never seen the Queen's Gardens dressed up quite so nicely.

Orbs of light floated in the sky, a combination of fireflies and the work of Wylie. In the middle of the pond sat the altar, an arch structure covered in vines and blooming flowers, floating on what was more or less a large flat boat. Oralie sat in the centre of the altar as the officiant.

The aisle ran directly through the pond itself, wooden slats temporarily upheld by Sophie and Fitz's telekinesis. On either side of the aisle were fountains created by Linh, moving around the blossoms that sat in the water with the gentle tide.

The light of the precession was covered by a ceiling of darkness made by Tam, false stars sat just under the created sky, they were also made by Wylie.

Most of the rest of their friends had more mundane tasks, Stina's was to organize the reception tables (Keefe had the last minute thought that perhaps they shouldn't have found a type of roses without thorns). The exception being Marella, who would destroy the evidence afterwards, as it was about the closest thing to arson they had this time around.

Keefe stood a few feet from the end of the aisle, Dex by his side, they had decided to walk in together.

Dex took in a deep breath.

"Ready?" Keefe asked.

"As I'll ever be."

Biana started, casting flower petals down the way to form their path, they walked between the very few seats of their guests, containing family and friends that might as well be. The silence was loud, they couldn't afford to be too noisy and had to go musicless. About halfway down, Keefe began to hum the traditional wedding march, earning a few chuckles.

After what felt like both a millisecond and an eternity, they reached the altar.

Anyone who they would've chosen as their "best" whatever was slightly occupied, Sophie and Fitz being their best friends and both still trying to keep the aisle up, so it was just them and Oralie on the floating alter.

"Welcome everyone," she started, "relationships formed by blood and by... certain shared experiences."

She cast a glance out to where everyone who helped with the initial wedding sat, a few people laughed lightly.

"After said experiences, I'm sure no one is particularly interested in a long-winded ceremony, so I'll do my best to keep this short. I believe I can speak for our grooms here and say they're incredibly grateful everyone could come today, and incredibly grateful no one will say a word about this to anyone else, yes?"

The crowd went into nodding and mumbled agreements.

"Fantastic," she continued, "At the previous request of Keefe, I will, quote unquote 'Cut out all that preamble stuff, they already know who we are and that we love each other,' so I shall."

Keefe chuckled, looking down, a bit embarrassed.

"Very quickly, everyone, 2 seconds to object-" no one did "- great, not like last time."

A few more laughs from the crowd.

She turned to address Keefe and Dex.

"Go ahead and hold your grooms hands."

They did. Keefe noticed how lovely Dex looked in the light of the false stars, his coat was green to contrast Keefe's lavender one, a matching carnation pinned on his lapel. For once, he had managed to get by without any smudge of dirt on his smiling face.

"Get your rings prepared"

They both reached into their pockets and pulled out their simple gold bands.

"The grooms have prepared some vows they'll read to each other now. Keefe, you may go first."

He took in a deep breath.

"You have no idea how tempted I am to make this a massive joke, but I've managed to resist and be mostly serious here, so everyone should be proud of me. Dex, I met you at what some may say, and by some I mean me, was the worst point in my life. Although I have to admit there were a few of those. I was... I can't even begin to describe it. Depressed, anxious about the future, but you were a light in that time. If it wasn't for you, I don't even know if I'd be here today. No pressure, or anything."

The last tension relieving bit earned a few laughs from the crowd.

"Most of all, though, I just wanted to say that I love you. More than anything. I can't believe someone so smart and handsome and- and just damn near perfect as far as I'm concerned would want to marry me, but I am so beyond grateful he does. I vow to support you and love you for the rest of my life, you're my world for now and eternity."

Keefe was starting to get a bit teary, Dex was too, as it seemed.

"Dex, go ahead," Oralie said.

"Alright. I have to be honest here, I didn't plan this all too well because I'm not particularly good with words. But I was thinking of everything that led up to us meeting, how much of a chance it was. I suppose I was lucky for having a manager who hated me and made me carry all the pots."

Keefe cracked a little smile along with Dex before he continued.

"Not to mention how many other things could've gone wrong between then and now. I'm just happy that everything worked out. That in a few minutes I'll have a talented, amazing, husband to spend forever with. I vow to love you and help you until we're both so old we don't even remember how we met, until we can love each other publicly and proudly call each other our husband no matter who's listening, until we can spend our days sitting by this pond telling our great-great-great-great-great nieces and nephews that we had to get married in secret, and they don't believe us. I just want to love you for the rest of forever."

Keefe promised himself he wouldn't cry at this part, but that didn't last very long, and he had to wipe away a few escapee tears.

"You may now exchange the rings," Oralie said.

They carefully slipped the rings on each other's fingers, they wouldn't be able to wear them in public, but it was about the thought.

"With the power vested in me, I declare you husband and husband. You may now kiss the groom."

Dex held Keefe's face and Keefe Dex's waist as they joined, perhaps for a few seconds longer than what was "proper". They broke apart to an excited crowd, clapping as loudly as they could spare. Keefe saw a few teary eyes in the crowd, mostly Kesler, Elwin, and Grady, he noticed. Giant softies, the lot of them.

"It is my honor to present for the first time, Mr. and Mr. Dizznee," Oralie announced over the excited guests.

Together they walked back down the aisle and onto solid ground. They were met with hugs and supportive words from their family, and truly, that was what they all were. Family, even if not by blood.

In the middle of the commotion, Amy Foster stood on a chair and cleared her throat, drawing everyone's attention.

She threw her arms up.

"Let's party!"

Cheers showed the crowd's agreement.

~*~

It was maybe an hour into the reception when Keefe finally found a moment of silence to get away.

They had eaten, done the cake cutting, smashed it into each other's faces, all the necessary things. Dex was occupied talking with his family, and though Keefe loved the Dizznee-Ruewens, he needed a moment to get away to talk to someone.

A short walk down a path brought him to the one area in the garden that hadn't been cleaned up, a small section with an overgrown grave right in the middle.

He thought it was only polite to say hello to his mother.

He sat down in front of the headstone.

Here lies former Queen Gisela Sencen

She died as she lived, fighting for what she believed in

Whether it be right or wrong.

"Hey, Mom. I um... I got married today! That was cool. I think you'd like him, you always liked smart people, although now that I think about it, I guess it was for all the wrong reasons. You'd probably try to bring him in to your weird cult-organization thingy. There's some people here I don't think you'd like very much, Prentice and Wylie, it's good you aren't here today, it's a miracle they don't hold a grudge on me for what you did."

He took a minute to collect his thoughts.

"I remember sneaking down here on nights I couldn't sleep, wishing you were still there to tuck me in, and then I'd feel guilty, because you were a murderer. But you were my mom, and if you hadn't screwed up so bad, maybe you still could be. I'm not a little kid who needs his mommy anymore, though. I have my own life. I've found my own family, and I don't need this one now. I think this will be the last time I visit you, Mom.

"Sometimes I wonder if you were like me. If you could ever even love Dad at all. Either way, you fucked up. I know now that I'm not like you, and I won't make the same mistakes you did. So, this is it, sleep well."

He stood up and walked away, not looking back.

~*~

When Keefe got back, everything was just the same, no one seemed to notice his absence at all. Marella and Amy were drinking fizzleberry wine together and bonding, he was sure they'd make a hell of a team, but was also terrified at what they could do together. Bronte was also enjoying the fizzleberry wine, Oralie quiet beside him. Sophie seemed to be hyping herself up in the corner. Biana, Fitz, Tam, and Linh all sat together at a table finishing their desserts. Stina and Maruca had gone off to take a walk through the castle grounds. Dex entertained his family, plus now the Endals and the Hesleges, with his improved fire lighter. Well, his family except the triplets, they may have been grown, but that never stopped their antics. Keefe didn't know where they were, and wasn't sure he wanted to.

Keefe strolled over to Sophie in her natural habitat of looking sick in the corner.

"Back to old habits I see," he said, plopping himself down next to her, "You know, that's a nice suit, it'd suck to get it dirty now."

"Yeah, well, I'm a coward."

"She's going to say yes, Foster. You've been together as long as me and Dex and look at us."

Sophie nodded hard a few times, like she was still convincing herself this was a good idea.

"It's... it's just a matter of doing it, right? Just sucking it up and doing it?"

Keefe nodded.

"Just walk over, say whatever little planned script I'm sure you have, and ask her. I could do it, so can you."

She nodded once more, resolutely this time, before standing up and brushing herself off. She stood still for a just a moment and then began her dragged-out walk to Biana's table. Truly, she could have done it in about 30 seconds, but decided to take a full minute.

In that time, Keefe walked over to Dex (who had gotten a break from entertaining the folks and now stood off to the side) and tapped him on the shoulder, pointing to Sophie.

Eventually she reached her partner. Keefe and Dex tried to subtly move closer to catch what she was saying.

"H-hey, um, Bi, can you come here for a minute."

Biana stood up.

"Sure, what's up?"

"I- um- well with the wedding and everything- and well we've been together so long I um... I was won- well, I was thinking..." she sighed in frustration. Seemingly done with the whole talking thing, she reached into her pocket, pulling out a box and opening the lid.

"Will you marry me?"

Biana put her hand over her mouth, whether in shock or an attempt not to chuckle at Sophie's flubbed attempt at a proposal, Keefe wasn't sure.

"Of course, dearest."

Biana held still only long enough for Sophie to just barely slip the ring onto her finger before she scooped up Sophie into a huge hug-kiss combination. Cheers and claps rang out across the crowd.

Keefe walked up to them.

"I told ya' it'd go well. Also, I call officiant."

"We'll think about it," Biana said dismissively. "Also, you knew? And didn't tell me? Shame on you."

"Didn't want to ruin the surprise. Or face the wrath of Foster."

Biana rolled her eyes as if the wrath of her fiancée was nothing to be afraid of, although it most certainly was.

Keefe backed up to let the horde of friends and family in to talk with them.

"Well, that went better than I thought," Dex said as Keefe approached.

"The wedding or Sophie's speech?"

"All of the above."

"Very true. No one's been caught on fire yet, I'd say it's a win for the evening."

Dex laughed.

"Yes, but it's getting awful late. I think it's about time we all turn in."

"Damn. If we ever get a public wedding, it needs to last longer than this."

Dex shrugged, Keefe knew he was probably tired of being around people for so long.

Keefe grabbed a glass and a fork, standing up on the nearest table and hitting them together to grab everyone's attention.

"Alright folks! That's it for tonight, don't worry, we get to do it all over again in a few months," he said, gesturing towards Biana and Sophie below.

He hopped off the table to begin the cleanup work for everything that wouldn't be burned, namely all the flowers and plates.

The moment he picked up a few glasses, Oralie approached him.

"Oh, you two don't worry about all of this. We'll get it, you guys just go to bed and rest up."

"We can help-"

Oralie cut Dex off.

"No, no, if I had a wedding I wouldn't want to be cleaning up. You all get out of here."

By this point a few more people noticed this and also agreed, to varying levels of politeness, that they should go home. Well, most people were very polite, Amy Foster is an outlier and should not be counted, with her comment of "Go home and make it official, goddammit!" It was at this moment Keefe regretted insisting there should be wine.

Keefe put his hands up in defeat and made his way towards the exit, Dex right behind.

Soon enough they reached the castle, and Keefe realized something.

"Hey, wait, I need to carry you in, don't I?"

"Well, you can, I guess, but couldn't I carry you in, too?"

"Yeah, but you're shorter than me."

"Hardly," Dex said, crossing his arms.

Keefe laughed.

"Okay, let's do rock, paper, scissors, for it," Keefe said, putting his hands in position.

They tried 5 different times, all ties, before Dex came out with a win.

"You cheated," Keefe said immediately.

"How does one cheat in rock, paper, scissors?"

"I don't know, but you found a way."

"Welp, rules are rules," Dex said with a shrug, picking Keefe up and holding him over his shoulder like a fireman as they walked through the doors of the guard-less west wing of the castle.

"You can definitely put me down now," Keefe said, craning his neck up.

"I could, but that's less fun," Dex replied, Keefe could hear the mischievous grin on his face.

"I wanna go to beeeeeed," Keefe said, doing his best imitation of a whiny child and kicking his legs around in the hopes his husband would get tired and perhaps ask for a divorce on the way out, if necessary.

"I'll take you to bed, then."

Unfortunately for Keefe, Dex seemed to get used to his antics from 10 years of being together.

After a horrible trip up the stairs and some awkward door fumbling, Dex put Keefe down, plopping him into bed.

"See? Was that so bad?"

Keefe made a noise that sounded a bit like a dying cow.

"I love you, too. I need to go now, another morning meeting."

Despite the fact that Keefe would very much like to keep complaining, he sat up and grabbed Dex's hand before he could go.

"I love you a lot, you know."

Dex laughed.

"I certainly hope so, you did just legally tie yourself to me for the rest of our lives."

Keefe smiled and pulled Dex into one last kiss before he had to go.

"Goodnight, I'll see you tomorrow, Techmaster."

"Goodnight, Keefe."

With that, his husband was gone out the window.

As he lay in bed, Keefe thought about the future. Being able to stay in the same place as his love without worrying about others finding out. Doing the little things, like having dinner together each night.

A lot of things had changed since they were teens, but two things hadn't. Their love, and their need to hide it.

Still, though, Keefe slept well that night. He dreamed of his husband, his mismatched family of misfits, and the home they'd make together.

He couldn't wait to rebuild this place with them.

#keeper of the lost cities #kotlc #kotlc fic #keefe sencen #dex dizznee #keefex

[picnokinesis]

I love your fics! What are your genderqueer/genderfluid!Thirteen headcanons?

Ahh hello there!! Thank you so much, I’m so glad you like them! :D

I’m not sure if you’re asking about my headcanons for campervan au thirteen or canon thirteen, since they are slightly different, but I’ll share my thoughts about canon thirteen since I think that’s what you’re after. Although as an amusing sidenote, I mostly hc canon thirteen as agender (with some fluctuation), but campervan thirteen was very insistent that she was genderqueer and I wasn’t going to argue with her hahahahah

BUT YEAH I think you need to look at the Doctor as a whole to understand my thoughts about Thirteen and gender. So, in general, I think the Doctor has no idea what to do with gender and wouldn’t know one if it hit them in the face with a baseball bat. I reckon that gender for timelords is a bit like a sense of style or taste, and not really something that is fundamental to how they function as a society. And so then the Doctor hasn’t ever really thought about it, until they run away and start hanging out with a bunch of British humans, who have a very structured (and constrictive, as far as the Doctor is concerned) gender system, and these humans are like ‘ah yes, you are A Man’ and the Doctor’s probably just like ‘ok? sure whatever’ and doesn’t really think about it. But then the Doctor continues to look like a man for...a LONG time, and so then it’s only when Thirteen comes around that suddenly these humans, who have treated them as A Man for so long, are now like ‘oh, A Woman’ and the Doctor’s like ‘um. No?’ - because as far as they’re concerned, their gender hasn’t changed. Like, their whole body has changed, but...their whole body changes every time they regenerate, so they’re like ‘what is so different this time compared to every other time?’. And I feel like the Doctor was sort of peripherally aware of this whole gender thing, but it’s only when it starts to directly affect them that they’re like ‘oh. hm.’

And so then Thirteen probably has this moment of ‘I’m not a woman, but actually I don’t think I’ve ever been a man either.’ Pronoun wise, I think it’s a bit confusing because I hc that the Doctor is speaking in Gallifreyan a lot of the time, and the TARDIS is constantly translating (because it’s only written Gallifreyan that the TARDIS doesn’t translate). I think it’s quite likely that Gallifreyan wouldn’t have gendered pronouns, as such? I feel like that would make sense, since you’re talking about a race that 1) doesn’t have this structured gender binary in the same way and 2) people’s entire bodies change biologically twelve times in their entire lifetimes. So gendered pronouns would be linguistically obsolete for Time Lords - which means that moments such as in The Doctor’s Wife when the Doctor is talking about the Corsair and flounders a little over the pronouns is probably the TARDIS’s botched attempt to translate such a concept into English HAHA - but anyway, my point it that to an outside observer, the Doctor appears pronoun indifferent, and probably they are, but only because the gendered pronouns are sort of lost on them? Although they are aware of some of the language differences - case in point, The Ghost Monument (where the Doctor must have been speaking in English since the start of series 11 since no TARDIS = no Gallifreyan translation, and I doubt that the translator things that the fam get given would translate Gallifreyan) when thirteen fumbles over the “come to daddy...I mean mummy...”. They’re aware of these things, but they’re just sort of an inconvenience to them. I reckon they get just as frustrated with tenses when trying to speak in English because I reckon Gallifreyan would have a lot more. 

That said, I do feel like the Doctor experiences some gender fluctuation, as I said earlier, although I would definitely see the Master as genderfluid whereas the Doctor’s gender is the personification of a shrug. The Master’s gender is all over the place, but their gender presentation is definitely more of a performance, rather than an accurate portrayal of how they feel, if that makes sense? Ironically, the Master has a much more nuanced understanding of how humans see gender, and enjoys playing with it, whereas the Doctor has no clue what to do with it and just wants to feel comfortable. 

Regarding stuff like dysphoria, I think Thirteen mostly feels social dysphoria, because she’s been used to being treated and seen a certain way, and now she isn’t, and it’s both weird, unnecessary and somewhat distressing. But I also think she probably feels some physical dysphoria too - more so than she’d normally feel when she regenerates into a new body, and I think it would confuse her when it lingers. I think she deals with it mostly by sticking with her usual fashion style (see: the suit she wears in Spyfall, which I adore because it just radiates agender/enby vibes to me, and it’s one of the rare times I’ve experienced gender envy from someone who is afab HAHAHA). But then I also lowkey love the idea of her wearing a binder, or trying out they/them pronouns, or cutting her hair shorter - I feel like the main reason she doesn’t is because she doesn’t know this stuff is an option, or even that the reason she’s got this discomfort is because of that, and these things are the possible solution. In fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if she thought her physical dysphoria was actually just a consequence of Twelve putting off the regeneration for so long, and so she isn’t quite settled right in her new body, as opposed to a gender thing. I would actually love to see her interact with more characters who knew her in previous regenerations - like more of Jack, or other characters, just because I think if they treated her different because she’s A Woman Now, she’d probably actually be able to say ‘ok what is with this? why is this a thing? my body has changed but I’m still the same, and this didn’t happen before, but actually I do feel this discomfort still what is with that???’ and the person would be like ‘ah. hm. how do I explain gender to an alien from a culture that views gender with the same level of importance and permanence as what kind of toppings you like on your pizza’

#doctor who #taka replies #the doctor #thirteen #gender #lgbt+ #I love this ask SO MUCH bless you #this turned out a bit more ramble-y than I thought #but it turns out I had a lot of thoughts #on any given day #my gender is spyfall HAHAHAHA #doctor who meta #I guess? #anon

[jacobsnicket]

fu:13si alternate titles

1. In Which Lemony Shits on Polka (Inside Job) 2. In Which Lemony and Moxie Argue about Board Games and Oliver is Very Done (Pinched Creature) 3. In Which Daniel Handler Says Enby Rights (Ransom Note) 4. In Which Jake Makes Muffins and Stew Sucks (Walkie-Talkie) 5. In Which Children Start a Gang (Bad Gang) 6. In Which Rich People are Dicks (Silver Spoon) 7. In Which Lemony is More Helpful to an Abused Child than All of the ASOUE Adults Combined (Violent Butcher) 8. In Which Nothing Much Happens but Lemony and Moxie Are Cute (Twelve or Thirteen) 9. In Which Daniel Writes a Scooby Doo Knockoff (Midnight Demon) 10. Seriously, Does Anyone Even Care About This One? (Three Suspects) 11. In Which Cool VFD Shit Happens In the Background (Vanished Message) 12. In Which Daniel Writes a Scooby Doo Knockoff: the Sequel (Troublesome Ghost) 13. In Which Lemony Wanders Around Town and Angsts (Figure in Fog)

#atwq #kiran.txt

[nachotrash]

MORE INCORRECT QUOTES

ft: @catchmewiddershins n @paradise-creator

Yaku: Dumbest scar stories, go! Pauline: I burned my tongue once drinking tea. Iwa: I dropped a hair dryer on my leg once and it burned. Shiyu: I have a piece of graphite in my leg for accidentally stabbing myself with a pencil in the first grade. Wid: I was taking a cup of noodles out of the microwave and spilled it in my hand and I got a really bad burn. Akaashi: I have emotional scars.

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Suga: What does “take out” mean? Yaku: Food. Iwa: Dating. Akaashi: Murder. Wid: It can be all three if you’re brave enough.

-------------------

Suga: Remember what I told you. Wid: Don’t be a cunt.

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Iwa: From now on we will be using code names. Iwa: You can address me as Eagle One. Iwa: Yaku is “been there done that”. Iwa: Akaashi is “currently doing that”. Iwa: Suga is “it happened once in a dream”. Iwa: Wid is “if I had to pick a dude/gal/enby”. Iwa: And Pauline is.. Iwa: Eagle Two Pauline: Oh thank god.

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Akaashi: What do you call disobeying the law? The Squad: A hobby. Akaashi: *crosses their arms* The Squad: That we do not engage in.

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Suga: Hey, I see those leaves, where are you from? Shiyu: Illinois. Suga: AAYYYE, I KNEW IT! ME TOO! Pauline: Did you just identify a state by looking at its leaves.

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Suga: *chokes on something* Wid: Jees, Suga, don't die on us. Suga: Don't tell me what to do, I'll die whenever the hell I want!

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Akaashi: You're a lying piece of shit! Shiyu: Oh yeah? You're the idiot that thinks you can get away with everything you do, WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD! Yaku: I'm leaving and I'm taking Iwa with me! Suga, gathering cards: Aaaaand that's enough Monopoly for today.

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Pauline: I just want someone to take me out. Yaku: On a date? Iwa: With a sniper gun? Wid: Both if you're not a coward.

(YES YAKU X PAULINE)

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Shiyu: Holy shit, Pauline, do you know what this means?! Pauline: Kid, whenever you start doing this, nobody knows what you mean.

(pretty sure im the youngest here-)

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Pauline: Shiyu isn’t answering my messages. Iwa: Allow me. Pauline: I tried 6 times, what makes you thi- Shiyu: *replying to message* Hello.

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Yaku: Shiyu- Shiyu: *sighs* Pauline used to call me Shiyu... Yaku: ...Because it's your fucking name.

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Shiyu: Rules were made to be broken. Wid: They were made to be followed. Nothing is made to be broken. Iwa: Uh, piñatas. Akaashi: Glow sticks. Pauline: Karate boards. Suga: Spaghetti when you have a small pot. Shiyu: Rules. Wid:

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Shiyu: Imagine if someone handed you a box full of all the things you lost throughout your life. Yaku: It would be nice to have my sense of purpose back... Akaashi: Oh wow, my childhood innocence! Thank you for finding this. Suga: My will to live! I haven't seen this in years. Pauline: I knew I lost that potential somewhere. Wid: Mental stability, my old friend! Shiyu: Jesus, could you guys lighten up a little?

----------------------

Pauline: Hey Suga, do you have any hobbies? Suga: Swimming.. Pauline: Really? That’s cool. I never expected you to- Suga: In a pool of self hatred and regret.

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Yaku: We can bake these cookies at 400 degrees for 10 minutes or 4,000 degrees for 1 minute. Akaashi: No, that's not how you make cookies. Shiyu: FLOOR IT!! Yaku: How about 4,000,000 degrees for 1 second?!? Akaashi: yOU'RE GONNA BURN THE HOUSE DOWN- Yaku: I'M GONNA HARNESS THE POWER OF THE FUCKING SUN TO MAKE COOKIES! Suga: DO IT! Akaashi: NO-

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Yaku: How did none of you hear what I just said?! Wid: I've been zoned out for the past two and a half hours. Akaashi: I got distracted halfway through. Suga: Ignoring you was a conscious decision.

----------------------

Iwa: If you get in trouble, I'm gonna be like... a lawyer to you. Ok? Yaku: Okay. *later* Pauline: Yaku! Sit down on the chair, you're in trouble. Iwa, whispering: Deny everything. Yaku, loudly: That isn't a chair.

-------------------------

Pauline: Iwa doesn’t look very happy. Yaku: That's their happy. They're just a bitch.

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Iwa: Who the fuck added me to a fucking group chat? Suga: >:O language Shiyu: Yeah watch your fucking language Akaashi: Okay, who taught Shiyu the fuck word?! Pauline: 'The fuck word'. Wid: Are you stupid? You guys use the f word all the time Shiyu: Oh my god they censored it Pauline: Say fuck, Wid. Shiyu: Do it, Wid. Say fuck.

(sounds like an actual conversation ngl)

-------------------------

Yaku: We need more help. Maybe I should call my friends. Wid: ... Your what? Yaku: My friends. Suga: Are they saying “friends”? Pauline: I think they're being sarcastic. Shiyu: No, no, no, this is delirium, they've cracked from being awake all night. Hey, Yaku! All of your friends are in this room.

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Yaku: Where's Iwa, Pauline, and Suga? Wid: They're playing hide and seek. Yaku: Where? Wid: I don't think you get how this game works.

------------

Wid: Akaashi, what are you doing? Akaashi: Making chocolate pudding. Wid: It's four in the morning, why are you making chocolate pudding? Akaashi: Because I've lost control of my life. Akaashi: Here's your pudding, Yaku. Yaku: Oh that's okay, I'm not hungry anymore.

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Iwa: Hold on! I’m having one of those things….a headache with pictures. Yaku: What the fuck? Pauline: They’re having an idea.

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Wid: Yaku's first detention, I'm so proud. Akaashi: Whoa, back up. Why did they get detention? Iwa: Because they're an idiot. Pauline, terrified: They can do that??

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Pauline: *about Iwa and Wid* They make a cute couple, huh? Yaku: They certainly are standing next to each other.

(OK BUT LIKE, 👀👀👀👀👀)

-------------------

Wid: When I said you should try being friendlier this isn't what I meant. Suga, stirring a cup of tea aggressively: Oh, so now I'm TOO friendly? There's no pleasing you. Yaku, who broke into their house an hour ago: Two sugars, please. Suga: Coming right up.

---------------

Akaashi: What's wrong with you? Yaku: Off the top of my head, I'd say low self-esteem, a lack of paternal affection, and a genetic predisposition for anxiety and depression.

----------------

Yaku: Why is Shiyu crying on the floor? Wid: They took one of those 'what person are you?' quizzes. Yaku: And? Wid: They got Pauline.

(id cry of happiness ngl)

------------

Wid: You really put aside everything and came all this way for me? How did you even get here so fast? Akaashi: Several traffic violations. Shiyu: Three counts of resisting arrest. Yaku: Roughly thirteen cans of energy drinks. Iwa: Also, that’s not our car.

#incorrect nacho