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#definitely some hurt in among the comfort
onlylove4louis · 12 hours
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This scene! This scene is STILL at the forefront of my mind... "Like a parrot, or an organ monkey... or a BUFFOON!"
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The way I absolutely ascended during this scene 🙌🏽
As a longtime hardcore book fan/nerd, this entire interaction was so utterly satisfying... it's definitely wearing the crown, for my all time favorite scene of this entire season. So far.
But other than Santiago learning what it means to 'fuck around and find out' with Mr. Du Lac, AND Armands power flex
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There are so many things that went on here, that I want to talk about...
First, I want to point out that this is one of those moments that shows, pretty blatantly, that Louis doesn't interact with this coven, for Armand.
It's Claudia that has him here. He's here for Claudia, to spend time with Claudia. And this moment, regardless of how it's erased by certain viewers, other than to make the claim that Claudia is "mocking" Louis here, humoring him like you would a child (okay Jan 🙄)... this little snapshot moment between them, is really wholesome. And shows that regardless of the circumstance they're still family, they still love eachother, they still enjoy eachothers company. But back to the beginning, if Claudia wasn't here, Louis would not be here. This gorgeous woman right here, the apple of his eye, is why Louis is here at all:
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So Louis and Claudia are huddled together at the end of the table, on the literal corner of it. And Louis is excitedly telling Claudia about the art, artist, his photography, etc. Basically telling her about his engagement in human affairs. He's clearly not interacting with this coven at all, and even is turned to just Claudia.
Which segways right into my next few parts of this, that I noticed/paid attention too... First, I can't for the life of me understand why they're all even here. They're all just sitting around this table basically in contempt and disdain, with only drinks in front of them that no one is really touching, because they can't enjoy it like humans can. They're not really talking to eachother, other than the catty 'mean girls' huddled together in the other corner. They only really even engage with Armand to tattle on eachother and fight like children. They're barely even moving. Like statues...
And then you have Louis over there at the corner, talking and laughing and smiling, with Claudia. Exclaiming and moving with his words, using his hands and body to articulate the emotion he feels. Passionate and alive. Being a perfect juxtaposition for the vast difference between Vampires and Humans. The humanity that he still retains just bleeds out of him, leaving him to perfectly blend into their surroundings while the other Vampires sit at the same table, just horribly out of place here. And it's exactly why, this is happening:
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Because among so many other things that this man, and this coven is jealous of, when it comes to Louis. It's that he is simply not "one of" them. He is 'other', he is too different. Unrecognizable to them and therefore unacceptable by them. It's the case of the ugly duckling. He was only "ugly" because he was surrounded by those who were not the same as him. Too different to be "beautiful" to them, to different to be allowed to just BE.
And Claudia is not innocent in this either. It's the distain she carries towards his photographs, the insult and mockery she levies at him any time she brings up his camera or his photography. The previous anger she expressed at him "carrying on" with the humans in Europe... completely oblivious to why it may matter to him. Why he's so comfortable around them, why he fits in so well with them.
To different to be allowed, to just BE. Too human to be one of them.
Which falls right into the next thing I noticed and both laughed at then immediately hurt my feelings about... Armand, is not having a good time at all here. Just not at all. And seeing as how this is some time after he again tried to plead, pressure and finally manipulate Louis into coming "around" more. Me thinks this may have been Armands demand of the coven in an attempt to do something that would put Louis more at ease, in order to get him to attend. Just be there. In a space that Armand also doesn't want to be, but has to be.
'You won't come to the theatre and watch these disturbing ass "weird" plays, you wont join in on blood sabbath. You won't hunt with us... so maybe, if we do something more human you'll come'. And it works, except... only Louis comes for Claudia, not Armand. He sits next to Claudia, not Armand. He engages and opens up, and shares passionately with Claudia, not Armand. So Armand won the time and the effort, but not the presence or attention.
But I could be totally wrong, and this could just be something they do every once and awhile, just as a coven.
But what I'm wanting to point out or focus on is that as they're all regarding Louis with annoyance, disgust, disdain, resentment, jealousy, etc. Armand is sitting there falling in love. Being drawn in by the light and life that's just pulsing out of this man. He's actively trying to be part of this engagement, this interaction, while still being left so out of it. He's watching Louis, and minutely reacting to what Louis' saying, almost as if he's pretending Louis is talking to him instead. Even smiles adoringly at him, when he manages to catch Louis' eye. But when Louis doesn't return the smile, Armands drops as well... And it's like he realizes he's standing out in the cold rain, looking in through the window at a blazing fireplace with warm light. While a loving family sits around a table to eat and enjoy eachothers company. Life and light, that he simply can't access.
This is a visualization of what Assad was referring to, when he says that Armand sees a "light" in Louis, he doesn't know what it is but he wants it. I think it's also a visualization of Louis humanity, his human heart. When watered and fed, and given the space to BREATHE, it just comes out of him, and infects everything around it. Something that I think typically dies in Vampires when they're turned. Either immediately or overtime. (side note: because again I always hurt my own feelings... I think it's what died in Claudia when Charlie burned. And it's also something that can't be extinguished in Lestat)
One last thing I want to point out here, because there's so many things you can talk about. But I'm trying not to write a novel every single time I post about this show 😅... But I think it's this moment, experiencing Armands power firsthand, that Claudia realizes how foolish it was, to think Armand was "safe" simply because he wasn't white. After Armand scolds them both for this; "If you want to act like fledglings do it in darkness", then he lets go of everyone's mind, and Louis storms out completely ignoring Armand and anyone else entirely. But he stops at Claudia, and Claudia only, asks if she's "okay". And only when she nods, does he snatch up his shit and leave. Claudia is clearly shook to her core, terrified, doesn't know what the fuck just happened. It had to have been like a cup of cold water to the face. Like woman please WAKE UP you're in DANGER here. But it's the fact that he actually stopped to ask her if she was okay, literally giving her yet another chance at an OUT (at least of that situation) when he hadn't a care in the world to check in on anyone else there. Even Armand.
There are so many times when I wish Claudia would just say "you were right, lets get the hell out of here" or "I changed my mind, I don't want to be here anymore", or literally any other version of it. But she doesn't. At this moment I had to hit pause and just scream in frustration (not literally, it was 4 in the morning, or 6... I can't remember. But it was too early to be actually screaming). Because I don't care what anyone says, if she actually said "No. Get me out of here" or "No, I want to leave too". They 100% would have left that restaurant together. Because while she subjected herself to the governing will/rule of this coven master, via becoming an official member of his coven. And therefore would not be as free to leave, Louis did not. And if she left with him, Armand would not have done a thing about it. Just like he didn't do anything about Louis completely ignoring his command and walking out. Armand wouldn't have picked that battle right there, in front of the coven, with Louis. I just wish she said "no" took his hand, and they both just walked out of there. Even if it was just for this singular occasion.
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pearlywritings · 9 months
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Sometimes the name doesn't matter
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synopsis: sometimes it matters that you are his wife. PART 2
pairings: Capitano, Kaveh, Tighnari, Zhongli x fem!reader (separately)
tw: fluff, established relationship, hurt/comfort; hybrids, unwelcomed courting, kind of female objectification (all in Tighnari's part)
word count: 6.9k+ words
a/n: part 1 can be read here!
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Capitano
Fast elegant fingers of a pianist run across the keys of black and white and the violins in the hands of other musicians are there to serve together with the chorus of beautiful voices, selected by Lady Columbina personally. The music infiltrates the souls of the nobles present, filling them with the sense of grandeur and glory, touching even their harsh unfeeling hearts.
The atmosphere of the gathering is gratifying, would’ve even been endearing if not for the stately figures of the Harbingers standing on both sides of the throne, where the Tsaritsa would've been seated had she not decided to refrain from attending it altogether. She has more important matters to take care of, and nine of her most loyal servants can definitely fill in her place on that yearly event.
Sure, this year it is more important since the two Harbingers are missing and the seats stay vacant - it's been the talk of the nation. Who is going to be nominated? Can it be influenced? Will they claim the names today?
Is the mysterious Commander, whose arrival became the topic of multiple speculations, be the one? A fierce warrior many heard of, but almost none saw face to face. The man was believed to be as powerful as the 11th Harbinger or maybe even the 10th! Having an army and an establishment of his own on the farthest line of the Snezhnayan border, he still is under the command of Lord Capitano, which makes it even harder to fish any more information than what is already known to the public.
"I only heard about him. He and his troops are protecting our borders from the monster's invasion in the North."
"Ew, who would've wanted to live in the North! It's much harsher than all the Snezhnaya."
"Shush, the Commander is wealthy and respectful, you can bear some cold."
"What do you imply?"
"The Commander is unmarried, there is no way he isn't, not with a life like this. But it can always be changed, and the woman he takes as wife would be one of the luckiest ones!"
"You are right… Maybe he is actually handsome. Maybe he'd be even willing to buy a whole mansion for his promised one and not take her with him to that awful place. Maybe…"
Maybe, maybe, maybe. It travels through the crowds like a storm in its wake, eventually reaching the Harbingers, who, for the first time after appearing and greeting the already arrived, stop resembling the statues. Eyes shift among the people and each other; some gazes hold interest, some - annoyance. Only Pantalone has an ever present smile on his face, fingers clasped in front of him and sapphire rings sparkle in the ballroom light.
"Looks like Capitano's estimated soldier caught everyone's attention. My, my, how curious and nosy the people can be…"
"I understand the curiosity though," admits Childe, arms crossed to prevent laying even a finger on his blade, that is resting on his hip. "This person sounds like an interesting specimen… I've heard of his talents in both strategy and tactics, and it seems like his strength is a legend. I'd love to spar with him."
"Oh you, thinking only about fights, young man," Pulcinella disapprovingly shakes his head and raises his cane to point in the gingerhead's direction. "I highly doubt our guest will have time to spare, considering the period of time concerning the stay that was mentioned in the letter we received."
"And I believe the majority of that time would be spent with Il Capitano, isn't it right?" Columbina's soft voice must be drowning in the music, but everyone hears her loud and clear.
"..." The Harbinger stays silent and nothing can be read from his body language since he is the only one remaining still in his place, his huge looming figure resembling one of the full-set armor nobles like putting in their halls as a part of interior. Except this one isn't empty.
"So much potential to become my test subject, to be perfected... Yet lost to the lands of Northern regions," Dottore huffs in disappointment, his sharp teeth peaking when he clicks his tongue. "Say, Pierro, can't things be rearranged? I'd happily have our dear border protector as my underling."
The silence between the nine suddenly becomes thick. There is something indescribably tense in the air and only Childe can't understand why some of his colleagues seem to be more interested in how the Captain would react and not the 1st of the Harbingers..
"You know why this can't be rearranged, Dottore," the stare of an icy blue eye would pin everyone to the ground, destroying their will and order to obey, though doing little to scare the Doctor. "And it was favored by the Tsaritsa herself."
The finality of the short statement makes the scientist back down from the proposition he's been bringing up every time the topic touches the Commander, yet ending up the same way as always - with an ultimate rejection.
Three heavy thuds make everyone in the room fall silent. Many heads turn to look at the ceremonial staff hitting the floor the last time and staying still in the hand of a tall, thoroughly dressed man.
"The protector of the Northern border, the glorified and esteemed warrior of Her Majesty Tsaritsa, The Commander has arrived," the master's of ceremonies voice carries like a thunderclap, cutting off the quite leisurely music the orchestra was playing for the dances and entertainment.
The rustle of note sheets is fleeting and not a moment later the musicians straighten in their seats, taking a deep breath. Trumpets boom in a spacious room and make nobles shiver in surprise, some especially susceptible women even lean on their partners for support. The choir and the violins join the triumphant song the brass instruments sing, signaling that the time has come.
Everyone holds their breath as the tall heavy doors leading to the ballroom are being pulled open. Everyone has their gaze glued to a slowly growing gap. Everyone keeps their eyes wide open, afraid that even one blink can cost them missing the legendary sight.
Everyone gasps.
The tall figure enters, posture straight and shoulders squared, confidence evident in every step. Black satin clothes are adorned with golden chains and intricate patterns. The white military coat stayed resting on the shoulders - showing off the position, the closeness to the Harbingers. And then there is the face - a scar crossing the left brow, calm bored eyes, not sparing anyone a glance, which do not fit the other female features of your face.
Yes, the Commander happens to be a woman.
Stopping by the steps leading to the throne, you bow - not kneel, bow, - holding your open palm by the heart and respectfully closing your eyes. Music stops.
“Greetings, my lords. Let Tsaritsa bless you and your mission.”
“Let Tsaritsa bless you and your service to her,” Pierro says, raising his hand. “Lift your head,” which you do, looking him right in the eyes, yet still holding your hand by the chest. “There is time for duties and there is time for entertainment. And tonight, given your rare visits to the capital, I suggest you enjoy the latter.”
“Much obliged, Lord Pierro.”
And with a wave of the older man’s hand, the orchestra starts a new composition, waking up the ones who were in a daze, reminding others they are here for drama.
And the first one to take action is the 11th Harbinger.
“Commander, Sir- I mean, Lady?” The gingerhead is the closest to you out of all his colleagues, having only to descend a few steps to be on your level. “I’ve heard a lot about you, many admirable things. How do you look at sparring?”
“Right in the middle of a ballroom? Quite positively, young man,” your lips twist in a half-smirk, baring a sharp pearly canine. “But I believe the nobles have already had enough shock to take and rumors to create. Maybe another time. Haven’t seen you before though. Are you new?”
“Tartaglia, the Eleventh Harbinger, Lady Commander.”
“Ma’am would be enough,” you click your tongue, glancing behind and noticing how slowly, but surely some of the aristocrats are inching towards you, clearly interested in conversation, Well, you are not. “On second thought, starting a duel right now and here doesn’t sound like a bad idea…”
“I’ve always known you are quite insane,” Arlechino butts her way in the conversation, giving you only a small nod as a greeting. You simply glance at her.
“For years I’ve been hearing of my insanity, think of something new,”
“How about, ‘the one who knows no limits’?” Pantalone’s smile is as dazzling as it’s fake and sometimes your hands are itching to strangle the man. Maybe even go all the way out and bite his head off. Literally.
“The only ones who know no limits are the wind and the stupidity. I’m neither. Who I am though,” your gaze travels higher, to the steps closest to the Tsaritsa’s throne, to there Pierro and the first three Harbingers are standing, “is a wife. And I’d like to have a dance with my husband.”
Not many heard your words, but the ones who did, gasp loudly, staring at you with wide eyes. Which get even wider when Il Capitano, a seemingly motionless statue before, turns in his place and, without a pause, steadily descends to you. Now, as you are standing so closely it becomes evident how obviously your outfits match. The chains, the patterns, even the precious stones - everything. Perhaps it is terrifyingly cute. Perhaps it's cutely terrifying.
“Husband,” your smile again, offering him your hand, which he immediately envelopes in his big clawed one.
“Wife,” is the first word the big figure rumbles for the evening, the void of its helmet staring at you. And that’s all you speak to each other, hearing the beginning of another melody and turning to join the dancing pairs.
“...What was that?” Childe voices what’s been plaguing the minds of the attendees. “First the Commander appears to be a woman, and now she is married to the Lord Il Capitano?” He glances at Pulcinella, who joins his side and decides to watch the pair that caused a commotion have their fun. “Do they not use their names?”
“They find no sense in them,” the Rooster answers just the last question. “And,” he lowers his voice and the ginger has to bend down to hear the next words, “I didn’t tell you that, but the Captain really loves calling her his wife. So be quite cautious while seeking a fight with her. You might end up impaled. By either of them.”
Kaveh
With a soft smile you watch a group of children merrily leaving their classroom, interrupting each other in attempts to tell everyone how exciting the lesson was. They do not forget to grin and wave at you, passing by, and you return the sentiment, contently observing their happy faces and sparkly eyes.
Every time this happens, a strange sense of fulfillment overtakes you - supporting and sponsoring Kaveh was one of the best decisions you’ve ever made. The greatest architect of nowadays is offering his guidance to the young generation, teaching them everything about beauty and practicality, helping them to develop their own creative vision, and at the same time boosting the confidence of kids of all ages. And you couldn’t be prouder of him.
Him, who meticulously prepares for every single lesson. Him, who is oh-so-gentle with his words and precise in his speech. Him, who teaches both Sumeru citizens and people coming from abroad. Him, who is as passionate about it, as he is about his designing job, telling you every single detail of how the lessons went on your way home or over the dinner. Him, who is happy and who makes you happy too with that fact alone.
When the last kid leaves, marking the ending of the final class for today, you glance at the clock. Now Mister Meticulousness will need half an hour to tidy up the classroom and put all the tools away. Tomorrow is free from classes at his (he always corrects your as in the both of you) school, so you can collect your stuff as well - after all, being the manager of this establishment and Kaveh specifically requires your presence. You can be strict and unyielding whenever he can’t and this partnership proves to be successful every day.
Just as you are writing down some financial staff, there is a soft knock on the doorframe. Immediately lifting your eyes you hum, observing a very good-looking woman and a boy, shyly holding onto her hand.
“Hello, how can I help you?” With a quill laid on top of your accounting book, you stand and round the table, offering the two to step closer.
“Ah, hello, miss…” eyes with long, pretty lashes flit to the name tag attached to your clothes, “...Y/n. This is master Kaveh’s artistic school, am I correct?”
“Yes, you are. Are you here to sign your boy up for a class?” You offer her son a sweet smile and he answers you with a small lift of his lips.
“Mhm. You see, he is a big fan of master Kaveh and his works - can study the pictures of his designs taken by Kamera day and night.”
At that, the boy lowers his gaze and blushes a little, digging a hole in the ground with the tip of his shoe.
“Oh, really?” A gasp that escapes your chest is one of excitement. “That’s marvelous! I am sure your hopefully soon-to-be-teacher will be very interested in hearing your opinion of his works, young connoisseur,” he giggles, lifting his eyes at you again, and there you see undisguised delight. “Oh, but my bad, I didn’t ask your names…”
The woman’s lips bare two rows of perfectly white teeth as she smiles at you, introducing herself and her son.
“We are from Fontaine actually. But my parents wanted to spend some indefinite period of time in Sumeru for their health and we decided to join them. So while we are here, I thought I’d make my son’s dream come true.”
“That’s so nice of you,” you can’t help but admire her a little for that. “I can tell you first a little about our school, you’ll ask all the questions you need to, and then I’ll show you around. Kaveh should be done with cleaning by then, so there’s a big chance you’ll even talk to him personally.”
“Really!?” That’s the first time throughout your entire interaction when the boy opens his mouth and actually makes a sound. “Master Kaveh is here right now?”
“He is. But can’t promise a long conversation - there are still blueprints waiting for him back at home.
“Ah, right… He is the great architect after all,” the woman hums, staring to the side as if in thought. “Between the commissions he takes and this school he must be making good money. Not to mention so handsome…”
Oh… What a familiar tone, what a familiar look in those eyes. Suddenly that ounce of respect you felt for her disappears.
“Money is irrelevant to him as long as he reaches his goal,” is your restrained response. 
“Ah, of course! Handsome, sweet, kind, good with kids and is not a snob. Sweety, you ought to charm him for me!” She pinches her son’s cheek. “Imagine Master Kaveh as your daddy!”
Oh Archons, again?
There is absolutely no doubt that the light of Kshahrewar is not only well-known and popular among kids, but is thirsted after by women. In a half of a year your school has been existing, there were numerous times when moms of little students made comments alike or some single females trying to schedule private sessions with the architect. What a sagacious decision it was to make group studying only, it saves you some drama, once the legal document is shown. Though there are exceptionally persistent examples…
But this time you pity the kid a little, because he genuinely seems to admire Kaveh. And his next words make you internally cheer for the little guy.
“Master Kaveh as my dad? But mom, I have a dad already,” the boy pouts, rubbing at the pinched cheek. You notice a red mark and two little crescent moons that her nails left on a tender skin. “I love him and don’t need another one.”
“Sweety, you just don’t understand how great it would be to have such a dad! Just trust my word-”
“Ahem, Madame, I kindly ask you to deal with your family affairs once you are out of here. As for the school - I am open for discussion.”
The displeased way she glances at you doesn’t go unnoticed, but you do not show it anyhow, calmly staring back at her, while your hand reaches up to your chest. As if finally remembering her initial reason for coming here with her son, the woman sighs and puts a palm on the boy’s shoulder.
“Of course, miss- I’m sorry I forgot your name…” And her eyes flit to the name tag again.
Momentarily the woman squints from the light reflecting on the metal, and when she blinks the bright spots away, there is a beautiful golden ring on your hand. The hand that is holding the flipped tiny plate with just two words engraved in it.
"Kaveh's wife"
With widened eyes she stares back at your sweetly polite smile. Not saying a word as if letting the notion sink in, you walk to the wall. Grabbing the backs of two chairs you drag them to your table so they could sit, and take your rightful place in front of them. 
“If you are here for something aside from or instead of signing your son up for classes, I believe my name should be irrelevant to you. My status though,” you knock a nail twice on the badge, “must. So… what are you here for, Madame?”
The boy climbs onto his chair right away, while his mother tarries a little, still shocked by the revealed fact and your suddenly changed demeanor. She needs a couple more seconds to compose herself, but eventually she too sits down.
Despite what happened earlier, your conversation proves to be fruitful and fifteen minutes later you are showing around the school, sharing some additional information and answering every single of the kid’s questions. 
When in the last room you find your husband, closing Mehrak and looking ready to leave, the boy lets out a gasp. The sound attracts the man’s attention, and he turns to the three of you with a soft smile.
“Oh, hello there, little guy!” The blond waves at him, breaking the blissful stupor of a child that immediately turns red and hides behind his mother. Surprised, Kaveh looks at you for explanation but, instead, takes notice of your name’s replacement. Oh wow, this again. What was the last time you did that? Two weeks ago?
“Ah, Master Kaveh!” The woman charmingly smiles, batting her lashes at him, which would’ve made you cringe had it never happened before. “You see, my son-”
“Pardon me, Madame, give me a moment,” the male softly interrupts her and reaches for a similar metal plate on his chest with his own name to flip it. It’s almost comical how sour the temptress’s face got in a second.
And there is what for. Now two words are proudly matching yours, engraved in an equally beautiful cursive to remind the world who the two of you become once stripped of your names.
Just his ”Y/n’s husband” to your “Kaveh’s wife”.
And like that one more kid takes part in your lovely school and one suitor less is after one of its founders.
Tighnari
With each passing day of your team’s research in the desert you found it harder and harder to control yourself. Some days you were even on the verge of clawing and biting, tail and ears twitching in annoyance and pupils turning into wild slits, making your hybrid nature more obvious.
Was it because of the research? No, it couldn’t be farther - your colleagues have been making so much progress, heeding your advice and following your lead. Was it the location perhaps? A little, but you learnt how to deal with heat and dryness. Was the process taking too much time? On the contrary, you are on your way home already, having finished the job 4 days earlier than you estimated in the beginning.
Then what on earth could possibly trigger you like this?
Well…
“Hey, forest foxy, want me to catch the Consecrated Flying Serpent for you?”
Ah yes, him.
Never again will you trust the higher ups at the Akademiya to sponsor your team with the bodyguards. Out of every possible candidate, your Herbad-titled colleague concluded that hiring five descendants of Valuka Shuna would be a marvelous idea. 
“They are the desert kind - they’ll be good guides.” “Look how much stronger they are, they’ll definitely protect all of you.” “They are of the same kind as you, Y/n. Don’t you think it’ll be easier for you, as the leader, to have someone akin with you?”
No, it absolutely would not!
Desert fennec hybrids are different from the forest ones - and it’s not even the case of your green and their sandy brown fur or their more brutal physique against your more delicate one. It’s their character and world perception. You’ll never call them barbarians, but they really developed more of the animal nature than your kind did.
And from day one it was a pain in the butt. 
One of your five new bodyguards was clearly the leader - he was bigger and broodier, with more scars littering his body, and his whole stance was screaming of a higher position. When you were introduced for the first time, something lit up in his grayish eyes, which were looking you over appreciatively. You ignored that, more focused on the discussion of the upcoming expedition and making sure the five were aware of what was required of them.
Luckily they were, and, admittedly, they did fulfill their task meticulously, proving to be great help. If only one of them wasn’t so diligent.
You lost count of how many times the leader tried to get into your personal space and you had to move away. Of the numerous invitations to hunt together. Of the endless displays of his strength and abilities. Of the many conversations you didn’t even try to eavesdrop on (they talked pretty loudly) around the topic of when will your shell be cracked and you’d accept the male’s courting attempts.
The answer was obvious, but he just never got it. Even when you called him for a serious conversation on the turning-into-an-issue matter.
“With all respect I must ask you to stop with whatever you’ve been doing to woo me. I have a husband.”
You still remember how he blinked at you dumbly, clear lack of understanding written on the sun-kissed face.
“...and?”
“The heck do you mean ‘and’?”
“Well, you don’t have a mate?”
It was your turn to stare at him speechless, ear twitching and tail curling closer to your legs. It was getting worse than just ridiculous.
“If we are speaking in such terms, then my husband is my mate. So, please-”
You nearly gasped when the male immediately leant closely, violating your personal space and practically stuffing his nose against your neck. Shocked by such lack of shame, you lost the ability to talk or move for a moment, gaping at him sniffing around and humming upon the discovery.
“You don’t wear anyone’s smell on you.”
You were not proud of yourself at that moment, but you absolutely lost it. Sharpened claws dug into his chest and with an angry snarl you pushed him back.
“Get away from me!”
You must’ve been a sight - canines bared and fingers twitching, ready to attack; fur standing on both your ears and tail, signaling your distress and eyes slitted in pure rage while directed at the man in front of you. The worst part? The idiot seemed to like it even more.
“What me and my partner do must be of no concern to you. I told you ‘no’ and I mean it.”
But bold of you was to assume he’d stop. Oh no, it’s gotten worse. Now he was actively calling you a ‘forest foxy’, absolutely abandoning your name and even trying to scent you. It was suffocating - the desert aridity was lighter in comparison to the male hybrid’s pheromones. 
Never in all your academic practice have you wanted to return home so badly.
Fortunately, your colleagues quickly caught on to what was going on and always helped you to escape the unwanted interactions. Plus they were equally as mad as you were, because his individual scent irritated their human noses - and that was the main reason why you and Tighnari, both spending a lot of time around other people, did not practice it. Partly, you are sure, this whole situation was the reason for your earlier return - and you were grateful for their understanding.
However, your stubborn suitor did not dream of giving up. Killed desert animals were still offered to you, stories of his legendary battles with monsters were told for the hundredth time (even though no one was interested in listening at that point) and attempts to lure you with the musky smell once again made. Archons, and the green-furred fennec girls from your teens used to dream of that.
Maybe Lesser Lord Kusanali would be merciful and you’ll meet your husband somewhere on your way?
“Herbad Y/n!”
…wow, that was quick. Not Tighnari, but incredibly welcome too.
“Collei!” For the first time in days there is a reason for your soft smile. Which the young girl mirrors, waving at you from not so far away. You notice a couple more of the Forest Rangers at her side, and that sight alone makes you finally exhale in relief. You are so close to being home.
“Master is here too! Want me to get him?”
Oh, Dendro Archon, thank you.
“I’d really appreciate it, dear!” With a quick nod the green-haired apprentice disappears in the bushes, and you turn back to the scholars of your group. It’s time to abuse your power a little. “We are almost at the Devadaha Pool. Since all of you live in Sumeru City I hope you’ll excuse me for staying behind. As for you five,” your gaze moves to the bodyguards and it’s so hard not to rejoice - soon they’ll be just a memory, “I ask you to accompany the rest of my team to the Akademiya. Then you can consider your job done and be free. Keep the payment for the last three days that didn’t happen - think of it as a bonus for a good job.”
All but one eagerly nod and bid you farewell with wishes of getting home safely. And frankly speaking? You couldn’t care less for that one when you spot familiar and oh so dear big pointy ears with an intricate golden earring adorning one of them.
“Tighnari!” You didn’t want to sound so desperate, you really didn’t. But when those forest-like lovely eyes look in your direction, it becomes clear to you - the yearning has gotten unbearable.
“Y/n…” His smile is dazzling and the way his body immediately pushes to walk to you almost makes the memories of the last weeks’ events go away.
The key word - almost.
Someone grabs your elbow when you want to meet him halfway. Oh right, you already forgot about him.
“Let me go, you, imbecile!” And again you have to snarl and be rude, ripping your arm out of the strong hold and quickly darting into your husband’s embrace. The natural smell of the leaves, the flowers, the sweet and bitter concoctions he makes in his home laboratory, comfort you and your whole body goes nearly limp in his hold. It’s been weeks and you are tired of fighting with the brick wall - this time you want your lover to handle it for you.
“Y/n, my lotus, are you alright?” Gentle fingers comb through your hair and scratch at the base of your ears - a whole ass adult, that you are, wants to tear up. But you can only shake your head a no. “Has this man been bothering you?” This time it’s a yes. “I got you, dear.”
“So,” the browny green eyes sharpen upon staring at the cause of your current state, when it starts speaking, “you are that ‘husband’ the foxy has been talking about? I thought you’d be stronger. Or at least taller. Now I see that I was right and you really can’t be her mate.”
“Oh but I am. Not that we have to prove anything to a stranger. Y/n,” he carefully pries your face from his shoulder, caressing your cheek with a beanie pad, “let’s go home. You must be so-so tired.”
“I am, ‘nari. I am exhaus-”
“There’s no smell of you on her and vice versa,” the desert descendent of the Valuka Shuna seems to not be planning to stop. “Her neck is not marked. You let her wander by herself for weeks? And you keep calling her by the name. Her name should've stopped mattering once she became your mate!”
The hand around your waist tenses and you can feel the claws threatening to tear through the gloves he always wears. You don’t need to look at the face of your lover to know how pissed he is. And if Tighnari decides to attack him and tear his tongue out? You will not stop him.
“I am going to say it once and only once. She is not just a mate, she is my wife, by the Sumeru law and by the blessing of the Dendro Archon. And this fact must matter to you more than the case of her name. So fuck off and leave my wife alone. And if you don’t get it in a civil way - this woman is taken. And this territory is mine.”
With that, the Forest Watcher effortlessly lifts you in his arms and, holding you as if a precious bride, turns around to leave. You haven’t looked back once.
“You can’t imagine how much I missed being called your wife,” you quietly confess, wrapping your arms around his neck. “Especially after he didn’t listen when I said that I am.”
Tighnari hums sympathetically, leaning close to rub his nose against yours.
“Will it be okay then if today I address you as my wife only? When we join the other rangers, I mean.” 
”...if you think I will be embarrassed - make it a whole week.”
With a soft chuckle your husband plants a kiss on your lips, sealing the deal and promising you tranquil days at last.
“As you wish, wife.”
Zhongli
"...and so Rex Lapis takes the form of a dragon, a majestic creature he was born as - the one of whom the fair maiden would never be scared of. Lady Guizhong's robes flutter in the tender wind traveling among the mountain peaks and caressing the earthly scales of the God's enormous body. His eyes, shiny as gold, gaze at her with an unfamiliar softness as she holds a gentle flower - a delicate gift from her lover, the one that proves that under all that armor is a stone heart capable of love. Heart that is beating for her."
To loud applause the Iron Tongue Tian bows his head, drawing the legend of the gods in love to its end. You cannot bring yourself to clap even politely, both hands on your lap, hidden under the table, twitching when a man beside you lets his gloved palms meet each other a couple of times.
It’s the second time you had to sit and endure the baloney from the very beginning to the very end, not to count all those times you overheard it in passing. From the moment you settled in the Liyue Harbor together with your husband, to live the rest of your incredibly long lives together among the humans, you've been painfully aware of their interpretation of Rex Lapis and his relationship with other immortal beings. Before that you rarely accompanied him during the walks, busy with helping Yakshas and other adepti protect the said humans to grant them a peaceful life - as immortal guardians grew fewer, every single one counted.
Never have you ever imagined that knowing so little of the citizens’ folklore would backfire so hard. It seems that people got somewhat bored listening to the stories of Liyue and Rex Lapis, no matter how many interpretations existed. Literature became more diverse in genres and romantic novels were on top of the list, so street narrators started losing their audience little by little. Before it could grow into something more drastic the new side of history was presented to the public - stories about love among immortals appeared and its freshness and uniqueness caught people’s attention immediately.
In their searches for new material, speakers dug through hundreds of volumes. The main interest was the Lord of Geo, of course. If you have a story of a presumably stone-hearted creature ever having fallen in love with someone - that’s pure gold! But who could you present as a love interest of the Archon? It must be someone very close to him and, obviously, no one is more well-known for that than the deceased Archon of Dust.
You sigh, reaching for your cup and declining Madam Ping’s offer to pour you some more tea - for an unclear reason the fellow adeptus joined you two tonight. You have thousands of years of life behind your existence, a soul hardened by constant battles, and mannerism as polished as a jade statue, yet for a moment you feel concerned that the woman would notice a pang of hurt in the smallest of your features.
Zhongli definitely noticed the first time. It was meant to be a date night - simple, but sweet, with the evening lights, delightful aroma of the finest tea and the tales pouring from skilled tongues reflecting the atmosphere of what your nation really is. However, the luck of the land of trades wasn’t on your side, as someone requested the “Guili legend” as they called it. At first you were confused. Then in disbelief, almost turning to look at your mate, with whom you were bonded long before he became allies with the ash-haired woman. In the end you felt something you thought was beyond you - bitterness.
When you left the restaurant, slowly walking back to your house, Zhongli’s fingers gently touched your elbow, asking for your attention.
“Does it bother you that much, my love?”
Bother you? Well… It does feel insulting when someone speaks of your husband having been in love with someone else, but mortals can’t possibly know the truth for many reasons.
“I can’t say it doesn’t,” you admitted calmly, stopping and turning fully to him. He did the same, gazing at you with a hint of worry in those golden eyes you loved so much. The ones, you knew, always looked only at you. “But it can’t be helped, right? There was a reason and mutual agreement why you, as Rex Lapis, made our union unknown to your people, and now, since you are “dead”? There is no one to tell our story. Don’t worry though,” you put a hand on top of his and smiled, when his other one was laid on top of yours in a gesture of comfort. “I can deal with it. I know you love going to the storyteller’s performances. I’ll just try to ignore what they say about you and Lady Guizhong.”
Sometimes Zhongli thinks he does not deserve you. Ever so patient and understanding, you always had your husband's best interest at heart. Marriage, however, in its basis is a form of a contract, and a good contract is all about both sides being equal in everything. And if you must know one thing about Rex Lapis - he never makes bad contracts.
When the audience calms down, the man decides to make his presence and intentions clear by raising a hand. From the corner of his eye he notices you slightly turning your head to glance at him, and he catches a glimpse of puzzlement in your gaze. He can't help but think how adorable you are, even if you deny it again and again, claiming that nothing can be adorable about a several millennia-old warrior. Maybe not, but his wife definitely is, and he thinks with a primordial pride igniting in his chest, that mating with you was the best decision his past self had ever made.
Reaching under the table he rests his free hand on top of yours, gently squeezing it in reassurance, offering you the warmth of himself, seeping through his glove. Just as your shoulders relax to his delight, the raised hand adorned with rings is finally noticed.
"Ah, Mr Zhongli! Such an honor to see a regular, especially someone as wise as yourself!" Iron Tongue Tian beams with a wide smile, closing his fan and focusing his full attention on the history connoisseur. "I doubt you have questions, given your vast knowledge, and I can't wait to hear what else you can add to this already heart-felt story."
You force your lips not to twitch, hiding behind the tea cup again. Suddenly it tastes bitter. But another squeeze your husband gives your hand doesn't let you dwell on it too much.
"You are correct, I do have some knowledge to offer. However, it might disappoint you, as it will completely destroy the story of the Geo Archon and the Archon of Dust."
The whispers ran through the crowd like a powerful wave, and you can see confusion written over every single face. But also, there is intrigue.
"I took it upon myself,” Zhongli however continues, “to invite Madame Ping to back up my story, as she was the witness to it," the elder woman - a well-known Adeptus that doesn't hide her existence among mortals - nods with a soft smile.
"I read this in legends a long time ago, but remembered only when the 'Guili legend' became popular. Rex Lapis indeed had a lover, however it was not Lady Guizhong," the gasps are almost deafening. Just as your quickened heartbeat.
And for the next hour the man by your side and the elderly-looking woman that joined you tonight proceed to tell the story of the adeptus, who was the first and only to ever bring the Geo Archon to his knees, to be worshiped like a goddess by his eyes, by his words, by his very heart. Of a warrior, whose fierce eyes and valiant nature made a dragon in Rex Lapis roar in delight. Of the woman, who entranced him with her beauty, caring soul and motherly attention directed to other adepti - Madame Ping adds with a laugh of how the two created a parent-like dynamic even before they became official (at that you find it so hard not to turn bashful).
They tell the legend of the silk flowers - the ones you might see everywhere in the vast lands of Liyue. How the Geo Archon personally asked the Dendro Archon for guidance to cultivate the tenderest of flowers, how he taught his people to make the delicate fabric out of it, but even then it couldn’t compare to the skin of his immortal mate.
They tell stories of how annoyed she was when the god turned into a dragon to fall asleep somewhere in the depths of the earth for years without telling her prior, and how he returned with the purest stones and metals and with his own hands forged the pair of matrimonial rings (yes, the ones wrapped around your fingers to this day).
Madame Ping fondly speaks of all those thousands of years of protection the said adeptus spent to make sure that her godly spouse’s people were safe and maybe just a tiny sliver of pride rushes through your heart at the public acknowledgement.
“But she wished not to be known,” the woman sighs and you know she glances at you reproachfully. Well-deserved, given the circumstances you are in right now. “Thus it’s not much of a surprise people made a mistake like that. Besides, you won’t find much information in written sources about her either way.”
 “But she must have a name at least!” Someone from the fairly grown crowd exclaims.
“That she does,” Zhongli nods, lacing his fingers with yours under the table, lips tugging in a calm smile, when you squeeze his hand in return. “Though I am afraid it would be pointless to try and find out now - we wouldn’t want to disturb her mourning the departure of her husband, would we? After all, they must’ve loved each other so much.”
“But how can you be so sure?”
“Because,” golden eyes are on you, catching yours, pulling you in, whispering for your soul and heart to get lost in them, “I can understand how this love was born and got to bloom. My wife showed me that.”
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casuallyawkardd · 11 months
Text
Close Encounters of the Spiderkind
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Pairing: Miguel O’Hara x Single Mother!Reader
Summary: When reader refuses to go on a mission, Miguel decides to pay a home visit to figure out why 
Warnings: SLIGHT SPOILERS FOR ATSV! fluff, slight hurt/comfort and angst if you squint hard enough, Miguel is a softie around kids, it’s giving slow burn/platonic vibes, not fluent in Spanish so feel free to correct my wording/punctuation
A/N: This is kind of my way of dipping my toes back into the world of fanfiction writing, if ya’ll end up liking it I was planning on making it a little series of sorts. Not necessarily a multipart story, rather just little moments following the same general characters. I took the liberty of assigning a gender and name to the reader’s daughter since that sounded like it’d be easier in terms of writing, the rest is still like any Y/N story. Reader is also a spider person, but I’m not married to the idea for future oneshots? Drabbles? I don’t know what you kids call them nowadays...
MASTERLIST | TAGLIST
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It had only been a couple months since you had joined Spider-Society and, while you were still trying to find your footing, things were going a lot better than expected. There was a comradery with being around other people with the same abilities, who had experienced the same losses, victories and all that came with wearing the mask. You had found some good friends among the other Spiders, particularly with Peter B and Jess, as there was a common ground there that you had yet to share with them; something that the three of you had in common.
That commonality was currently asleep in the other room, your daughter Vada. For once, it had been a day where the radios were quiet. No calls from HQ to go on missions, no worrying chatter on the police radios, so you had taken the day to spend time with your daughter. The three year old was going through a phase where she was having nightmares almost every night, so the day was spent at home relaxing. From watching movies, to cooking meals together, Vada had been your little shadow all day and you had enjoyed every second of it.  While your toddler had tuckered herself out, you were restless, curled up on the couch watching TV at a low enough volume that only you could hear, thanks to your heightened senses. It may have been almost midnight, but that was still considered an early night for you. Used to the regime of patrolling until early in the morning and crawling into bed to get a few hours asleep before Vada came in to ask for her breakfast. Just as you were starting to feel the pull of sleep on your eyelids, letting the quiet calm sink into your bones, the moment was then yanked from you. When the beeping started the first time, you had acted on instinct to silence the noise. Your hand practically slapped the Gizmo on your wrist, the same Gizmo given to you by Miguel when you had joined his Spider-Society.  Ugh, Miguel. It was a damn shame that such a pretty face was wasted on a sourpuss like him. While being the leader of an elite group of Spider-People sounded like no easy task, there were times the man definitely took it too seriously. Sure, he had a great work ethic and was a respectable leader, but that all came with the downside that you couldn’t stand being around him for more than five minutes. You two hadn’t gotten off on the right foot and it seemed like he wouldn’t let you live that down. Ever the stern, cold-hearted leader, barking orders and chewing your ass out if something went wrong. He hardly ever smiled and when he did it was condescending, almost smug as he questioned just how intelligent you actually were. A waste of a pretty face indeed.
That pretty face came to mind when you looked down at your Gizmo, which was beeping once more, finally processing that it was Miguel who was trying to contact you. Shit.
“Hello?” your voice is quiet, wary as you answer him finally; trying to keep quiet for the toddler sleeping in the other room. Also because of the worry that you’ve pissed him off once again.
“Why aren’t you answering?” his voice cuts through the silence, monotone and firm. “An anomaly was detected on Earth-616, go take care of it. Ben Reilly and Peter Parker from Earth-13122 are already en route.”
“I....can’t,” you cringe as the word leaves your mouth. The pregnant pause that follows feels like an eternity.
“What do you mean you ‘can’t’?” He spits the word back at you, like you offended him with just the one syllable. More silence follows, Miguel waiting for your answer and you not knowing what to say. “...Is something wrong?”
“I have to go,” you end the call, not even registering the concern that had slid its way into his tone. With a heavy sigh, you lay your head against the back of the couch, regretting how you handled the situation, but thankful it was dealt with. That is until the familiar sound of a portal opening and closing disturbs your precious quiet once more. 
It makes you almost jump out of your skin, physically lurching off the couch, the warm hues from the light of the portal filling your living room and disappearing as quickly as they came. In their place is Miguel, clad in his spidersuit from head to toe. A wave of emotions goes through you, the look of shock, confusion and anger crossing your face in less than a second. He doesn’t seem to have noticed you yet, glancing around the space and disengaging his mask when he doesn’t register any immediate threats.
“What are you doing here!?” it takes all you have not to shout the words at him, instead resorting to a sort of hiss to keep your voice down. Miguel doesn’t seem to take the hint.
“This is why you couldn’t come? Because you’re too busy lounging around and watching trash TV?” he isn’t shouting per se, rather his tone makes him sound louder. That and the quiet of your apartment probably amplified his voice even more. “I know the weight of keeping the multiverse intact might go over your head, but the least you could do is be there for your teammates. I don’t allow slackers in my-” “Shh!” you’re moving towards him without even realizing, motherly instinct telling you to silence the noise that dared try to wake your daughter. Your hand reaches to cover his loud mouth and Miguel takes a step back to avoid your touch, the frustration reflecting in his eyes turning into red, hot anger. 
“Did you just ‘shh’ me!?” he sounds as if he’s in disbelief, his voice now actually rising in volume. You stumble over your words, trying to apologize and explain yourself all at once. Now it’s his turn to step towards you, his imposing frame towering over you and you can’t help but shrink back, “I don’t know who you think you are, but if you don’t get your ass in your suit, I’ll-”
“Mama?” Vada’s little voice cuts through the air, both Miguel and you freezing. When you turn to look at your daughter, who’s standing in the doorway to her bedroom, it feels like everything around you fades away. The static of the TV, Miguel, everything until all you can focus on is Vada. She’s clearly distressed, as you come to kneel in front of her you can see the tears in her big round eyes, the redness around them and on her nose, the slight tremble in her bottom lip. You know what’s wrong before she even has to explain.
“Sweet girl, another one?” you ask calmly, a hand going to stroke her hair. Vada nods, confirming your suspicion that she had been roused by yet another nightmare. The creak of the floorboards alerts you of Miguel taking a step closer and you’re suddenly very much aware of his presence once again. However, your eyes don’t leave Vada’s crying face. “Let’s get you back into bed,” you try to coax her into heading back the way she came, your toddler only resisting and shaking her head firmly.
“I want Mama’s bed,” she demands, sounding groggy as the sleep she had just risen from had yet to fully leave her. Vada doesn’t even let you respond before her tiny arms wrap around your neck, face pressing into the junction of your neck and shoulder, “Want you,” she mutters against you, the exhaustion and distress in her voice making your heart ache for her. “Vada,” you sigh heavily, exhausted as well. Exhausted from the heavy workload of being Spider-Woman not just for your universe, but other universes as well. Exhausted from the fact your child couldn’t get a wink of sleep and seeing her frustrated made you frustrated as well. You cave, scooping your daughter up in your arms and standing. Her body molds to yours, relaxing against your frame like it had done so many times before. As you rub her back and kiss her temple, you’re forced to turn and deal with the elephant in the room. Or rather the spider. 
You expect Miguel to look annoyed, as usual, but he isn’t. In fact, the anger he was prepared to unleash on you moments ago seems to have vanished, replaced with a look of curiosity, intrigue and dare you say....awe? He’s looking at Vada, who’s about to pass out in your arms, with a softened expression, the sight of the small girl seeming to tug the corners of his mouth up just slightly.
Huh.
Miguel seems to catch himself staring, shaking his head to clear the fog and meeting your gaze once more. “I...didn’t know,” is all he can say, not as confident in the way he stands.
“No one knows,” you reply in a much harsher tone than you intended. After a deep breath, you adjust how you speak, “I’ve only been on the team for a couple months. It’s not that I don’t trust the other spiders...I just want to be careful, yah know?” Miguel nods along with what you say and you can’t help but keep talking to fill the now awkward silence, “Usually I have someone to watch her, but it’s been so long since I’ve had a day to just give her all my attention- I promise, it won’t happen again. I know that I should answer if you call-”
“Cállate,” Miguel cuts you off and you’re almost grateful he’s saved you from rambling. There’s another moment of silence before he sighs, “You don’t have to explain yourself, really. If I had known,” he waves a hand to indicate to your daughter, “this was the reason you were ignoring my calls, I wouldn’t have been so hard on you. Your daughter comes first, I get it.”
His words hit harder than they should. Every Spider-Person had heard the story. How Miguel was willing to put his own duties aside to live in a universe where he had a daughter of his own. Replacing the him of that universe, who had died tragically, to live the life he had always wanted; only to have that universe crumble around him. Literally. It explained his cold demeanor, you’d probably be a bitch too if your daughter died in your arms, but that coldness you had become accustomed to seemed to melt away the longer he took in the sight of you holding your daughter.
“You said her name’s Vada?” he asks, stepping a little closer. Normally, you would probably keep your distance from him, maternal instincts in overdrive with an imposing figure like Miguel so close to Vada, but you stay in place. Not bothered by his presence for once. He’s looking at you, expecting an answer, and you nod your head. He hums, “How old?”
“Three,” you answer and he hums again. “...Is everything okay? Regarding the mission?”
“Huh? Oh,” he clears his throat, adjusting his stance and taking a small step back. When had he gotten so close to you? “I think those two should be fine on their own. Earth-13122′s Spider-Man knows what he’s doing and-”
“You know, you can just call him Lego Spider-Man. Everyone calls him Lego Spider-Man.”
“That’s not his correct title.”
“Uh-huh,” you smile, holding back a laugh at how serious Miguel seemed to be about the subject. “...Well, I think it’s time we go to bed.”
“Right, right,” Miguel moves like he’s about to walk out the front door, seeming to forget that he had come via portal and catching himself as his hand grasps the handle. Has he always been this socially awkward? He turns to look at you again, “Should I just...?”
“Yes, please open your noisy portal outside.”
“Claro que sí,” he nods in understanding, opening the door. Just as he’s about to leave, he pauses again, turning to look back at you, “Even if you’re busy, you should still answer when I call. I was worried about you.”
“Worried about me?” you repeat, a bit of teasing in your voice.
“Worried as in the normal amount of worried.”
“Sure, sure, O’Hara.”
“I’m leaving now,” he huffs, turning to leave again. Yet he can’t help but stop one more time, “Goodnight.”
He finally leaves, door shutting with a soft click. You go to the door to lock it, carrying Vada into your room for bed. It seems that she had managed to fall back asleep despite your little interaction with Miguel. As you lay down and pull the comforter over the two of you, Vada snuggling impossibly close to you once more, you lie there thinking about what had just transpired. 
Maybe his pretty face wasn’t a waste. 
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doflamingadonquixote · 4 months
Text
Worthy {PT 1/2}
Parings: Lucifer Morningstar x Sinner!Dom!Reader
Warnings: no one in this chapter, just a little bit of swearing and an hurt/comfort situation
Words: don’t know, more than 7000
Summary: After returning to the hotel from a day at work, you find Lucifer sitting alone and in misery. A confrontation ensues that you would never have imagined in your unlife.
A/N: English is not my first language, I apologize for any errors but I also rely heavily on a translator. Criticisms and your opinions are always welcome. I decided to divide this mini ff into TWO parts. The second will be more spicy. Let me know who would like to be mentioned for next part! Enjoy!
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You rushed in through the front door, waving your umbrella and shaking off the drops of acid rain that were quickly eating away at your jacket.
It was the fourth this week. Something was going wrong with the weather in the circle of pride.
The room had probably emptied by now given the time. There were only a few little sinners left in the armchair, entertaining themselves with their phones.
Their rooms must surely be near Alastor's radio tower. After several complaints it was discovered that the closer you were to it, the more those little gadgets seemed to have problems or interference.
“Don't be too late. Tomorrow morning Charlie will set up the new program for the week.” You communicated to them, moving behind the chair and letting a hand ruffle the younger sinner's hair.
He muttered something but nothing that was too rude towards you. As you approached the staircase back to your rooms, a white-clad figure at the bar caught your attention.
Lucifer was bent with his elbows on the table, between his fingers a half-full glass of some liquor that he had stolen from Husk's supplies.
With a loud sigh he brought it to his lips but before it could reach them, your fingers blocked the advance of the glass, pushing it down by the top again.
Lucifer turned to look at you quickly but his shoulders visibly relaxed when he acknowledged your presence.
“Whatever answer you are looking for, you won’t find it in that glass, sir.” You warned him and, in the distraction of his gaze on you, you slipped the glass from his hand, brought it to your mouth and emptied the contents down your throat.
The liquid burned faintly, causing you to cough barely. Yes, it had definitely touched Husk's good reserve.
“You've been out a long time today. Any news?” He asked as he watched you set the glass down in the sink, beyond the counter.
“Not much, really. Sinners are still very hesitant.” You shrugged but turned a happy smile on him. “At least they listen now, though. They don't accept, but they listen to what you have to say. Small steps.”
You and Lucifer met after Charlie hired you while she was in a meeting with Camilla. You worked with her in the beginning, identifying potential clients all around the circle.
Charlie probably saw some salesmanship in you that she could also exploit in convincing sinners to redeem themselves.
You were not a longtime sinner. You had recently died so you hadn’t had a chance to take an interest in the royal family.
The first time you saw Lucifer you expected something more threatening, malevolent.
Instead, you had been confronted by a little jumping baked bean who made pancakes in profusion for breakfast.
You had immediately sympathized with his personality. You considered yourself a very mild-mannered fellow so his influence was a healthy touch for your motivation as well.
You had also worked together on some proposals to present to the newcomers though with some difficulty in agreeing among yourselves.
For some strange reason his idea about the duck pool exceeded yours in preference. Seeing the hotel sinners enjoying themselves in the yellow duck pile was hilarious and utterly unbelievable.
Because of that, you had grown very close to the King and respected him very much.
Therefore, seeing him in such a pitiful state as he was in at that very moment threw a sense of unease upon you.
“Shitty day for you too?” You asked, almost as if you were disinterested. If he didn't want to answer, he could have ignored you and not felt forced to necessarily say anything.
However, the soft sound of sobbing reached your ears loud and clear.
You turned quickly but his face was bent away from you on his shoulder, not allowing you to look at him properly.
The only thing you could see was the tremor in his back and how his hands had closed forcibly on his crossed arms, resting on the counter.
Out of the corner of your eye, you watched the two remaining little sinners giggle over something they had seen on their phones, oblivious to what was happening a few feet away from them.
You didn't know what to do. Touching him seemed to be too much, and you weren't sure of your comforting skills at that moment. You felt you did not know him well enough to afford certain words of comfort.
So you did the only thing you thought wise.
Hide him.
Your coat slipped over him with a gentle rustle, covering him totally from head to toe thanks to your stature.
Lucifer turned in wonder at you, his eyes bright and red with unshed tears under the loose hood falling over his face.
You gave him a smile as his cheeks turned a soft rose color.
“You know, if you have any problems you can talk to me, right? I can't assure you a very good therapy session but I think it's good just to talk about it.”
The ex Angel remained motionless for a few seconds, and you read the situation as a choice to prefer silence.
You didn't blame him, in fact you were a little embarrassed that you had the temerity to propose such a thing to him.
You got up from your chair, ready to say good night to him and retreat when one of his black hands twisted around your wrist, preventing you from moving further away.
You blinked a few seconds, confused but returned with your butt to the chair, your body fully toward him.
“Today is eight years since Lilith left.”
You smiled sadly. You had to understand that Lilith was the reason. After all, she alone had the ability to make him unhappy, besides his daughter but she never made him unhappy.
“Oh, that must suck.”
“Yeah.”
You frowned. After eight whole years had the man still not moved on? And Lilith hadn't even deigned to give an explanation or try to communicate with him the whole time? What man waits for his wife for eight years without moving on with his own life? How could she refuse the love of such a pure being?
Fuck, she really doesn't deserve him! If only he were yours…
“Do you really think so?”
Lucifer's voice made you jerk.
“What?” You asked confusedly, forcing your heart to suppress that senseless anger born out of nowhere.
“What you said, that she doesn't deserve me...” his lips quivered and his eyes had reached the size of those of an needy dog.
Shit, had you said that out loud!?
“Um, I think so,” you shook your head, looking away from him. “I'm sorry, I had no authority to say that. It's just...I don't know...you're an exceptional person, Lucifer. You deserve the best.”
You bit your lip. That drink really must have had powerful effects to let you open up so much with a being who could disintegrate you with a snap of his fingers.
“I..…T-Thank you.”
Flabbergasted, you noticed how the king's pale face was slowly turning a scarlet red and stretching to below the collar of his shirt.
He was flattered by your words? Did he not intend to kill you for disrespecting him?
“I only said what I think.” You added at the end, as if to solidify that you had gotten away with it.
You went back to looking in front of you, now unsure of how to continue that conversation, and you noticed how a light complexion had been added to your own cheeks as well.
But it seemed that Lucifer had not finished.
“If I were yours...”
The lump of saliva you were trying to get down stuck in your throat and you began to cough convulsively in surprise.
“D-did you hear that too?!”
What the hell was wrong with you that day? You had never been so brazen and indelicate. But there was something about Lucifer that set off all the right points for you.
You couldn't reason with him.
“Do you mean it? Would you appreciate me if I was?”
His body language had changed. He still looked embarrassed but the way he leaned toward you, the fluttering eyelashes and a little pout on his lips clearly told you that something had changed for the better.
You didn't blame Eva for accepting that damn apple. The man was driving you crazy and you were sure he knew it.
The hood of the vest over his face brushed your forehead, awakening you from the little trance you had entered.
“I would. I would adore you as the king you are and deserve to be.” Your hand reached his neck, preventing him from advancing any further. “But you are not in the right condition, sir. I don't want to take advantage-“
He puts a finger to your lips, forcing you to be silent while, with the other, he gently supports your face.
“Show me.”
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luvvixu · 4 days
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the end
synopsis: the end of your relationship was inevitable. that's why both of you and gojo satoru individually prepare yourselves against the pain and separation of an upcoming divorce. and when that thing came, you suddenly found yourselves trapped inside the circle of your marriage where denial is present, and acceptance is absent. let us all see how the marriage walk through the end.
tags: divorce!au, ex-husband!gojo, angst, hurt/no comfort, mentioned of death, mentioned of trauma, read at your own risk
a/n: here's an almost 8k words of oneshot about gojo marriage again. i've mentioned this before but im taking a very small break and will be back on june 5 with an update regarding to the chapter of mind over matter ff. be sure to check out the announcement!
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it was a peaceful morning on your balcony with satoru gojo, your husband for almost two years. you are reading your newly purchased book with your glasses on to help you see the letters.
you take a second peek at your husband who was already gazing at you from the beginning. his gaze was painted with a mixture of sadness and adoration towards you. looks like he had something to say, and you're right, he did have something to say when he mumbles your name.
oh god, you knew where this conversation would be. keeping your eyes bore on him, you fully turned your attention to him and waited for him to speak what's on his heart and mind.
"i think we should file a divorce."
his voice was monotonous and yet you knew it really wasn't, his face also did the same since you also didn't hold one either. your expression still remained calm like he was not asking for a divorce as you closed your book and then put it back on the coffee table.
meanwhile, satoru couldn't read you at this moment because you were quiet, too quiet for his liking. were you so shocked that you couldn't react to his sudden cut of ties? or was it just you already expected this the moment when you woke up?
probably, the most accurate reason and answer was the second one. satoru watches you lean on the seat with your hands clasp on your lap. he also never fails to see the neutral glaze in your eyes.
"if you are wondering why i didn't hold any emotion as you speak, that's because i already reacted a year ago." a sigh escalated from your lips as you removed your glasses also and put it on the table.
"you expected that this day would come?" he said in silence while secretly fiddling with the calluses on his hand—a hidden and canonical habit of satoru whenever he feels anxious and worried.
before this day would come, the two of you got married when both of you were twenty. a young, dumb, and somehow not stupid but definitely reckless who took a big tramp of change among themselves.
satoru was the one who asked you to get married after almost four years of being inside an on and off relationship. that was very fast and very reckless at that time—but of course you agreed because you are a fool to get yourself blinded by your love towards him.
so, the two of you got married and with only some people whom you both held close dearly attended the said wedding. it was simple and civil, but to you, it was your everything. the wedding and this marriage mean so much to you.
your marriage went pretty well in your first few months of being married. both of you got yourself a house with a nice garden that you absolutely adore, you also got yourselves a work almost instantly too. satoru got more missions since he was now a graduate, while you work in your own cafe and occasionally take jujutsu stuff.
things were really fine with heaven as the witness. until one night during your almost first anniversary, you caught him going home around three to four o'clock in the morning with a smell of alcohol and woman's perfume that's definitely not yours. he's really drunk, which was weird because he hates alcohol. you wondered what's the occasion or any celebration that should be celebrated and whatnots, but you can't think of any. so that leads you to silently crying.
you did not confront him about your first suspicion of cheating, you want him to admit it himself, but that doesn't mean you're going to tolerate that piece of shit because for god's sake! there's a fucking hickey on his neck that night, you knew it wasn't yours since you've barely had an intercourse due to both of your busy schedules.
you remember asking him about his whereabouts that night like you weren't aware, but his answer just disappoints you, he told you that he had an emergency mission and needed him in action asap at kyoto around 11pm and it took him some time to finish it. as mentioned before, his answer disappoints you, because your assumption has been partially proven.
satoru was clearly lying about his whereabouts that night but still the cheating allegations were not clear. maybe the seemingly foreign hickeys on his neck was already evidence but you're probably still in denial, so you didn't instantly conclude that he was really cheating with you.
but you still couldn't shake off his illicit affairs. why? because satoru was lying about the emergency mission on kyoto. he wasn't there, you knew that because you were the one who took the mission, not him. satoru actually rejected the mission because he's busy with other matters so you took it yourself without even telling him.
all of these things that are happening leads you back to that day when he proposed to you. it was so sudden that it made you a little bit skeptical. but when you asked him why he suddenly asked you to get married? easy, you didn't know.
however, you had your hypothesis that after geto disappeared and went on his rebellious phase, you let gojo use you to relieve his grief. that is why when you realize that this marriage is meant to not last long, you secretly cry to yourself during your first year anniversary as a married couple.
meanwhile, satoru knew to himself that he couldn't stand a long-term relationship. though he also started to feel bad for making things go very quickly with you, his love towards you is pure and genuine. in fact, he would do anything just to keep you safe and happy. but he wasn't able to do that when you're the opposite of him.
he is selfish and you are selfless.
no matter how hard he tried to change or even make things up for you, he just couldn't do it. there's this invisible dark string that pulls him inside the void of darkness. and he couldn't afford to bring you down with him. the thing that geto did really left a scar, a permanent scar to his chest that creates an inescapable hole that keeps on growing bigger and sucking his life in the process.
while you, you fully commit yourself to him. that's why everything would be pointless for satoru to let himself get hurt just to protect you. because you would literally throw yourself in the fire when he's burning.
it was like the two of you are a magnet with the same pole. you can't attract each other no matter how hard you try to let them collide.
back to reality, your head was faced downward. your husband sought for your eyes by calling your name meticulously, but you refused. an internal laugh at your pathetic figure rang through your mind, you are laughing at yourself for believing that you are already prepared for this moment, turns out, you're not—you’ll never be.
satoru mumbles your name again. and all of the sudden, you just let out a nod, followed by a small sigh. you let yourself look at him again despite the unnoticed tears in your eyes.
"okay, but let's spend this whole day as husband and wife for the last time. let's do the things we usually do during our free time." you said, and satoru agrees with you almost instantly. he thinks this is the least thing he could do for you before setting each other free.
everything went normal for the rest of the day. satoru takes you out for lunch, visits your favorite cafe for desserts, and even goes to the park where he asked you out to be his wife.
and right now, the two of you are in the cemetery, specifically in haibara's graveyard. the sun was proceeding to its dusk, making the place a bit solemn because of its ambience.
"do you think he'll be mad at my decision?" your soon-to-be ex-husband asked you with his small tired voice. haibara was your bestest friend of all and he actually talked to gojo when he's still alive about his relationship with you. he would like gojo to take care of you and treat you more than you deserve in your entire life.
"i don't think so. haibara only wants the best for us. he's a man of freedom, after all. and yet, how ironic because he, himself, has no freedom during his time in the jujutsu." you answered him as you watched the candle burn itself.
satoru looked at you. "how about you, y/n? are you mad at my decision?" he asked you a bit hesitant.
you just smiled at him and said, "i will answer that later, satoru." satoru nodded at your answer, he understood that you had a lot to say to him later.
after some time, you two decided to go home to your shared apartment. the journey back was fun and relaxing, it was filled with smiles and laughter that will soon vanish as the dawn is coming.
6:00 PM
both of you arrived at home. you helped satoru hang his coat on the raker like you usually do whenever he comes home during winter. this small act is something that would be definitely missed by him dearly, since you will not be around to do it.
"thanks for agreeing to go out with me." you said to him with a smile that almost reached your eyes. the only thing that stops you from giving your bestest smile was the divorce, but you subside because this is your last day as a married couple. you have to enjoy it to the extent.
"that was the least thing i could do for you before…nevermind." he said. satoru was not cheerful enough to make you smile whenever your eyes met. you also noticed that he was downhearted since you visited haibara's graveyard.
though as you were heading in your shared apartment, he was smiling and laughing. guess you didn't overlook him at all and you failed to notice his hidden pain.
you watched him lay down on the couch. "you looked bothered. was it because i didn't answer your question earlier?" you said quietly.
satoru didn't say anything, and according to his vocabulary, silence means yes. you sigh to yourself and take a seat on the same couch where your husband was lying in.
your hand reached out for his face, cupping it as satoru looked at you with his hooded eyelids. those magical six blue eyes are staring at you with known emotion, pain and agony.
"you didn't ask me why i suddenly wanted to get divorce…" he mumbles, nestling his head in your palm.
"you agreed without questioning me. i don't even see you cry about this. why y/n? are you hurting yourself by keeping your emotions inside you?" he continued. the pain in his voice breaks your heart into bits of pieces. satoru looked so vulnerable, his true emotions are showing exclusively for you.
you let out a small but bitter chuckle. "crying is not part of the things we usually do during our free time together, toru." his eyes widened at your answer. a droplet of tears slide down on your palm. satoru was crying, and you let him weep because you knew he's pent up.
"and i'm not mad at you. i also didn't ask you any questions because i know you know what you are doing and i respect your decision." you added.
"although, i admit. i want to bawl my eyes out. i want to scream because my heart is aching for believing that i was prepared for this moment." your breathings started to become shaky also just by watching satoru weep under your touch.
you refused to cry. at least not now.
"but i don't want to ruin this day by crying. i want both of us to savor this moment with smiles and laughter. so that when we part our ways, we wouldn't have any regrets to hold."
"so, satoru…let's continue to spend the rest of our night happily, hmm?" you let yourself smile for him to be motivated to stop from crying. however, he did the opposite. satoru cried even harder.
your hand is being cradled by him. you could feel his tears on your palm followed by his little hiccups. this scene alone in front of was usually enough to make you cry even harder than him. it was utterly heartbroken to see your man cry like this.
"hush, my…" love, that's the word you would like to say but forbids you to do so. satoru also noticed it too and he absolutely hates the feeling of it.
"l-love. call me love. c-call me like you used to call me before. first name basis is not part of the things we usually do during our free time together." he mimicked your words earlier. though it may sound like a joke, it isn't. satoru has been dead serious since the beginning of the day.
"my love…"
"y-yes, my sweetheart?" he responded.
your lips quiver from the overflowing emotions in your chest, but you still refuse to let yourself cry even when you're all by yourself. god, you are hopeless and devastated.
but dear me, it felt so good to hear him call you with endearing words. oh how you wish this kind of moment would last forever. maybe in another life, it would be. only if fate would be kind enough to give satoru to you again, maybe it will and it would be.
8:00 PM
satoru was all alone. his eyes were puffy from crying and stuff. he was such a mess. and if anyone would see, they would probably think that he's a zombie because of how low energy he was.
it took him almost an hour to stop crying. and you declared that this is the first and would be the last time that you would see him cry very hard.
right now, he was currently packing his things as he was about to move out tonight while playing betty by taylor swift. somehow, his mood got even more affected by this song, for every lyric hits him hard and he doesn't know why.
"♪ you heard the rumors from inez, you can't believe a word she says ♪" the radio sang. a shaky sigh came out from his mouth, he felt like crying again.
“♪ most times, but this time, it was true ♪”
"let me help you pack your things." you suddenly barge inside your onced shared bedroom after cleaning up for tonight. you are also in your sleep wear when satoru looks at you.
“♪ the worst thing that i ever did, was what i did to you ♪”
you didn't fail to notice that he is listening to one of your favorite artist's songs. a flashback hits you, it was the moment where you persuade him to listen to it with you. now, he has grown invested in their songs.
he mumbles a small okay as he watches you sit down beside him and redo the messy clothes he just stuffed inside his luggage. most of his clothes were luxurious like polo shirts, slacks pants, coats, and his favorite, blindfolds.
your eyes soften when you come across a small pouch that contains hair ties and bobby pins you onced bought for him as a prank. you still remembered the moment he let you tie his messy white locks with colorful pins and he looked so incredibly pretty with it. you couldn't help but to feel yourself getting emotional again.
don't cry. don't cry. don't cry.
meanwhile, satoru remained very quiet, for he was staring at the photo in his hand. it was your wedding photo where the both of you are wearing traditional japanese attire. he couldn't help but stare at your smiling face for too long. you looked so beautiful.
the wedding was very simple, but satoru describes it as one of his happiest days, and he is not lying to himself whenever he would say that. because he onced dreamed of getting married to you, and it came true. he also had the same state as you, both on the verge of crying.
"i wonder…would you get remarried someday?" he asked out of the sudden. you shifted your gaze to him and found him staring at your wedding photo. instantly, your eyes went soft.
"i am not sure." you replied silently as you closed his luggage and proceeded to the other one.
your hands momentarily stop working as you stare at them and watch it shake. "but if i do, it would probably take me a decade or so to find another husband to love." you said. but truth to be told, you had no motivation left to find another husband.
"you're twenty-two right now. so like…you'll be thirty plus by then when that happens," he calculated. "how about you? would you consider getting remarried also?" you asked him the same question.
he thinks for a moment before nodding slightly. "probably yes." your heart let out a wince but you tried your best to hide it. those words unintentionally hurt you and cut you deeper than a knife.
"w-well, i just wished good luck for both of us in the future." the crack in your voice didn't go unnoticed by satoru. he was about to reach you but then eventually dropped it. "me too…" was all he could say.
"anyway, do you mind if i ask…where are you staying after this?" you trailed off.
"i'll stay with higuruma for a day before moving out to my new apartment. speaking of that man, i told him to be here around midnight. so we still have four hours to be together." he answered
"...yeah."
10:00 PM
the two of you are sitting on the same seat just like this morning in the balcony. you are wearing your favorite cardigan as satoru was in his coat to fight the cold weather of the night.
all of his things were already packed and ready to leave. soon, you'll be alone and this house will not be lively as usual because his presence will be missed.
both of you refuse to say a word, yet. because you two are scared to have another breakdown that made this marriage even harder to break. especially satoru, he was aware that deep inside him he was not ready to let you go. he was just lying to himself because he is aware that he can heal if he gives himself some time.
"y/n, can i hold you here in my arms?" satoru swallowed all of the bitterness he felt for leaving you just to hold you again, for one last time. you slowly stood up from your and came towards in front of him.
your soon-to-be ex-husband gazes upon you. however, you refuse to meet those warm eyes that you loved the most. satoru slowly pulls you into his lap and cradles you like his greatest treasure, which you definitely is.
when your face hits his shoulder, you couldn't help but to hide your face deeper into his neck. "the place i'm going to stay afterwards is far from here. are you sure you will be okay?" he whispers in your ears.
"yeah, i'll be fine." you nodded solemnly. "i also planned to stop from my work for a while." you added.
"why?" satoru raises his eyebrow. he thought you loved your job as a barista. you enjoyed making coffee and wherever there's extra pastries left in the cafe, you would take it home for him to try it.
"don't worry, i had a lot of fortune that could last for a century. and besides, you even said i had a midas touch, so surviving won't be too hard for me." when your parents died, they left all of their fortune to you. so that makes you an instant millionaire and nobody knows that beside your husband.
satoru gently pushes you to meet his eyes. "i think this moment is perfect to give all of my secrets away. i don't need any perfect lies to hide from you anymore." he tucked the loose hair on the back of your ear, admiring your beautiful frame under the pale moonlight.
he gulped nervously, and for some reason, you're becoming very anxious about what he's going to tell. all you had to do was to wait for him to speak his thoughts out.
"the reason why i want to divorce is to have a new life and forget about the past. that includes you, y/n." though he only started, millions of knives already stabbed your poor heart. your eyes stared at him, a bit widely.
satoru couldn't bear to look at your pained expression, but he forced himself to look at you. so that you would feel his sincerity. "before suguru disappeared, he once told me to choose another path of life. he told me to run away from the jujutsu, run away from my life." he said, almost whispering.
"although, i want you to come with me. but…"
"i somehow got myself involved with the jujutsu too?" you continued it for him. satoru falls silent, so that means yes, it is true.
satoru cups your face. "i'm sorry, y/n. i really, really love you. but this is not the right path for us. you'll get more hurt if you continue to get tangled with me. so, after a lot of thinking and consideration…"
"i became selfish once again. i chose myself over you, y/n."
for the nth time, the walls you have been building around your emotional state are starting to shake once more. you could feel the hot tears building in your eyes.
you will not cry. you will not cry. you will not cry.
"i-i understand…although, you don't have to apologize for choosing what is the best for you. i'm actually glad that you're finally doing it." you plant your palms over his hands on your cheeks, closing your eyes to swallow up those annoying tears.
"i'm such a bad husband, aren't i?" satoru chuckles weakly. what has he done to deserve you like this? your understandment is something that he greatly admires in you. your heart is pure like an angel from above.
an angel like you can't fly down hell with him.
but god, you're making yourself willing to go down with him without any hesitation and that is just completely wrong.
and for the past years, satoru would make a mistake and you are there to correct him patiently. he would always tell himself to make something and make everything up for you. but who would have thought a divorce is the best thing to do?
"to be honest, not at all. remember what i told you before we got married? you are the fire and i'm the—"
"gasoline?"
"no silly, that's a song." your laugh brightens up the atmosphere. satoru smiled at your happy demure, he likes seeing you this joyful.
"you are the fire and i'm the fireman. a fireman would not function completely when there is no fire. meaning, why would i, a fireman, be here if there's no you, a fire." you raised your fingers to help you visualize your point.
"does that make sense to you?"
satoru shook his head. "no."
you snapped your finger. "exactly! you think i'm bad at explaining things, while i think of myself as great at explaining things. that's the same as you thinking you're a bad husband, while i think of you as a great husband."
"..."
"i made you speechless, meaning you agree and i'm great at philosophy!" you boosted yourself by imagining a crowd was giving you a round of applause.
your husband wonders for a moment before cackling a laugh. "that still didn't make sense to me but it brought a lot of comfort to me. thank you, y/n."
"come on! just admit you love my philosophical nonsense." you pouted, hitting his shoulder playfully.
satoru laughed once again, pulling you by waist as he buried his face in your hair. "of course i do. i love everything about you." and he would still do, always and forever.
"i'm going to miss this." you mumbled as you relaxed on his touch. satoru also agrees, kissing your head all over again.
"and i'm going to miss you too, a lot." he said sincerely. the two of you held the longest stare on this day. you just let yourselves drown with each other's enticing orbs.
satoru was the first one to break the record by sighing and rubbing his eyes. the truth is, he couldn't bear to look at you any longer because he could see how broken you looked through your eyes just because of him. instead, he hides his face once more on your neck.
“i'm really, really, really sorry, y/n. i'm so sorry for using you. i’m so sorry for cheating on you. i’m so sorry for hurting you. i'm so sorry for not choosing you again. i'm so sorry for being selfish. i'm so sorry for everything." there it is, again. his hot tears are back and now drenching your shoulder.
"i used you as a getaway from my sins and from the grief that day, y/n. you should've said no when i asked you to marry me, but why did you do the opposite?" his voice became slightly thicker, he's definitely frustrated.
"i did it for love, satoru." you answered without hesitation.
satoru momentarily stopped crying as his breath hitch. "yes, i'm already aware of your true intentions that day. but i still chose to marry you because i love you. i know it sounds so dumb but it's true." you continued.
you could feel his arms around your body tighten, scared of letting you go from nothing. it was like he was begging the gods, if there was one seeing the both of them right now, to let him be delusional and not take you away from him.
"let me ask you this time, do you regret marrying me?" you whispered.
your husband looked at you with unshed tears. "i don't. but i regret that this is the end of us."
why is it always the time where someone would tell their true feelings when everything is falling apart? so if this divorce wouldn't happen, does that mean his word would be forever kept inside him?
"i've always wanted to tell you that i was actually glad that you became my wife. i thought you would be my endgame. instead, you became the reason why i am still here and breathing."
the void of regret is slowly pulling him inside. but you are there to make sure that he would survive the gravitational pull. you just loved him so you will help to let you go.
"i love you, my sweetheart, my y/n, m-my wife..."
12:00 AM
it was quiet, really, really quiet. higuruma was looking at the two of you all over again. his eyes showed sympathy for both of you and he was sad because this is the end for you and satoru.
right now, both of you are staring blankly at the divorce paper on the table. no one was making a first move by signing it.
you let out a sigh, a heavy feeling was buried deep in your heart. your whole body feels so numb and you still haven't cried for today. everything feels so wrong, yet at the same time it feels right. you don't know what to do anymore.
as you recall your conversation with him, you just wished it didn't end and would continue forever. because you know you'll never get tired of hearing his voice, his laugh, and his philosophical nonsense too.
not to mention, you've also dreamed of building a family with him. a mini satoru and mini y/n sounds nice, doesn't it? as your eyes wandered across this apartment, you can depict your children with him running around. god, if you were dreaming, please don't wake up.
"higuruma, can you please just wait for me in the car…? i-i would like to have a final conversation with my wife." satoru suddenly spoke and nanami left without hesitation.
"so this is it?"
"yeah, t-this is the end." satoru chuckles breathlessly. there was like a big chuck on his throat that made him feel suffocating. truth to be told, he doesn't want this to be the end. but again, he has to.
"thank you for giving me a total of the best six years of my life, toru. i mean it, thank you." you counted the first four years of your relationship and the two years of your marriage. playing with your hands to mend the shakiness, it was a constant reminder that only a few minutes left before the surname satoru would be stripped of your name.
"thank you too, y/n. i also had so much fun and love these past six years. thank you for all of the things you have done for me." he said silently.
all this time, you are the only one looking at him because his eyes were focused on the paper in front of him. "good luck on your new path. i wish you the best." you intentionally called his attention.
"you're really staying here in this apartment…alone?" satoru asked you.
you let yourself smile slightly as you shifted into a more comfortable position. "yeah… just in case you feel homesick, this would be a reminder that you still have a home…only if you want to." the air in this room is very thick and it's suffocating you.
"t-thank you, y/n, really." he expressed his gratitude once again.
a nagging feeling tells you that satoru was about to go back on his decision at any minute. and you too would probably go back to your decisions you had set for both of you. it would be more devastating for you if satoru didn't achieve his plans for himself in the near future.
"let's not make higuruma wait."
satoru falls silent. now he was stuck in a madness of a dilemma. in short, he was starting to rethink his decision to the point that he didn't notice he was staining the divorce paper with tears. his hands began to shake violently along with his cries becoming louder any minute.
satoru finally lost his cool as he wailed loudly in front of you. the sound of his sobs made you clench your lip as your chest tightened once more.
you on the other hand, you're trying your best not to slip any tears down from your cheeks. you successfully stopped them from falling this morning, you couldn't afford to cry not because there's only a few minutes left before you would let yourself fall into a pit of sadness.
sensing that neither of you would make a move, you are aware that satoru couldn't bring himself to do it even though he had to. so, you gently steal the paper away from him.
divorce agreement…it read. oh how you despise those two words.
"satoru, i mentioned to you a while ago that the reason why i want to spend this last day as a married couple is because i want us to leave without holding any regrets." you started with your pen touching the paper. satoru's eyes widened, he wanted to stop you from doing it but nothing was coming out from his mouth.
"i can see it in your eyes, you're doubting your decisions." you continued as you wrote your name. in satoru's horror, only your signature is needed and everything would be over for him.
however, you stopped writing. you tapped the table to gather his attention to you. there he saw you smiling dearly at him.
"did you have fun spending time with me this whole day?" satoru knows your intention. you are encouraging him to do what he was supposed to do even if it means leaving you.
"yes…yes i do, i enjoyed being with you." he stuttered. the tears were still streaming down his face and he was using his sleeve to wipe it. you reached for the tissue and gave it to satoru as you watched him wiped his eyes and blow his nose.
"that's good to hear. i also had fun being with you. not only for this day, but the whole time i was with you, i enjoyed it." you grabbed his hands to soothe it by massaging those long and calloused fingers. satoru watches you and eventually becomes slightly calm by your actions.
you inched your lips into his fingers and kissed it delicately just like he used to do with you before. everything went blur to him and only the sound of your sweet nothing was audible into his messy world.
"i know you'll be doing great with or without me. so satoru, put more faith in yourself. this is another big step for us, and i want you to be ready just like i am." you swiftly slide the divorce paper in front of him. but this time, it has your signature on it.
satoru felt like he was being showered by the cold water as he stared at the paper with pure horror evident on his face. you finally did it, so there is no turning back now.
"h-how—when…! when did you sign it?" his voice cracked due to his frazzled emotions firing him repeatedly. satoru reaches the highest point of heartbreak he ever experienced in his life.
"when i gave you the tissue." you whispered weakly. to your dismay tears are only a slip away from your eyes a thousand times today.
"i don't want to sign it. i don't want to! i don't want to leave you anymore y/n!" he yelled. you accepted his lash out with open arms, but you can't do anything anymore. you finally signed the divorce settlement, and this paper wouldn't go if there's no signature of satoru.
you suddenly pull him into a passionate yet heartbroken kiss to shut him up. satoru eventually responds to your kiss, becoming more emotional than ever. while you are busy keeping him in company, you sneakily put the pen in his hand.
satoru felt an object in his palm, he knew you're telepathically telling him to sign the paper but he still refuses to acknowledge it, at least not yet. as he continues to devour your lips, his eyes are still producing salt tears that add more emotions in the atmosphere.
"i could see a bright future ahead of you, satoru." you muttered between the kisses.
"mhmp—you should grab it, please." you continued to deepen the kiss to lure him. but he voluntarily stepped away just to make a counter argument for that.
"but i could lose you if i do that." he whispers solemnly.
"we've already lost each other when we realized that everything was going too fast for both of us." you chuckled bitterly at your statement. "that it why it is time to face the consequences, by setting us free." you added.
"do…do you really want to do this?" he hiccups.
"this is what fate wants us to do." your voice is soothing as hell. it held no grudges nor resentment, just pure calm and adoration towards him.
but satoru still didn't bug and he still doesn't want to sign the papers.
your gaze never leaves him as satoru buries his face on his palm, weeping so quietly that you could almost hear a pin drop. it was getting so hard to watch so you looked away and slowly walked away.
"i am going out for a bit." you mumbled quietly, not waiting for him to reply or look as you walked away with your whole body shaking.
outside, there you saw higuruma leaning on his car exterior. "hey…" you greeted weakly. higuruma looked at you with a hint of sympathy in his eyes.
"hey…how did it go?" higuruma asked, his gaze falling on the papers in your hands.
"emotional." you joked.
"so, that's the end now?"
"...yep, that's the end now."
silence engulfed both of you, just your almost steady breathings and his observing orbs burning through your skin.
"never thought satoru could cry harder than he did when geto-san…you know." higuruma said, sighing as he tucks his hands on his pockets.
you nodded. "i know. satoru lost suguru literally, while he only lost me through relationship. he'd become more vulnerable around me, and that scares the hell out of me."
"i, his weakness, has become more exposed to his enemies. i know sooner or later, they would swoon to get me just to make him fall on his knees. we don't want that to happen, i don't want to be a bait nor a cause of his downfall. temporarily or permanently, satoru must not fall, no, not anymore." you continued.
"y/n-san, i hope you would also realize that failures, downfalls, mistakes, and damages are unavoidable, gojo-kun is no exception to all of that." higuruma argues.
"satoru is going to live a good life and have a future that he deserves, so who am i to halt it?” you ignored what he said because you know he was right.
“this is a big step for both of you. i just wished that everything would go well for the two of you.” higuruma smiled at you.
“we will, eventually.” you return the smile and then excuse yourself to go back inside, just to see satoru still crying nonstop.
approaching his figure, you wrapped your arms around his body to console the man. “don't go back to me now, satoru. if you cannot bring yourself to let go, then i will help you.” you whispered into his hair.
satoru pulled away just to look at you with his teary eyes. “i’m sorry, y/n. i’m really sorry.” he keeps on apologizing to you, while you just smile at him and wipe the tears in his eyes.
“it's alright, satoru. i already forgave you a long time ago.” you said.
“i can't sign it. i don't want to sign that anymore.” he confessed. a small form made its way to your temple” “but this is for both of us. don't you want to have a brand new start? how can we thrive when we both have shackles on our feet?”
“i-i thought everything was easy. i thought i could l-let you go that easily. but i was wrong. it's so hard to let go of us, y/n. and as much as i would like to do what i meant to do, it's just so hard to see us disappear from our now individual lives.” satoru buries his face on your stomach. your hands immediately made its way towards his hair as tears are threatening you once again.
“it's hard to let you go too, satoru. but it would be harder to see you suffer more when you're here with me.” it was getting late and satoru was still amidst the crisis, but you are determined to get him out of there.
“look at me, toru.” you cupped his cheeks and made him look at you. “you’ve still got a whole world to see. so don't you ever get worried about me because i’ll be more happy to see you free without any worries.
“go live a life that you weren't able to do when we were still kids. do what you always wanted to do.”
“and just so you know, i will always love you and you will always have a special place in my home.” you put his hand to your left chest where your heart lies. “here, satoru. you'll always be here.”
satoru pulled you into the tightest hug since it was literally the last and you wouldn't mind. reciprocating the hug, you finally smiled whole-heartedly and it even reached your eyes.
“whatever happens, i love you, y/n. i love you more than anything. i have loved you since the first time i saw you. and i will always love you even if this would be the last time i would see you.” throughout the six years that you two had been together, from boyfriend-girfriend relationship until to marriage—this was the very first time he declared his love to you with so much intensity.
your eyes nearly gave up on how long you've been trying to hold your tears. but you still swore that night that you'll never shed a tear unless satoru is out of the scene because you knew how much effect your crying causes him.
to hide your emotions, you pull him closer and share the last and passionate kiss as two persons who share the same surname are binded by the law. both of you could feel the emotions begin to overflow as things become more sensitive.
you were the first one to pull away as satoru was still crying. cradling his cheeks, you connected your foreheads together and said again, “let's not make higuruma wait any further.”
satoru knew it was time, time for him to finally sign the divorce paper that he's been planning for a month now.
he expected this one too just like you, so it shouldn't hurt, but why is his heart still aching? with a final stroke of his signature, satoru felt so empty. his soul feels like missing and something was taken away from him.
both have done it—a trial away and the marriage will no longer be valid. there would be no mr. and mrs. gojo now because both will live differently.
grabbing the paper with your shaky hands, you turn around at satoru and give him the final hug with a final kiss. “good luck on your new life, satoru. i’ll always cheer for you and support you until the end.”
“thank you so much, y/n. i really mean it.”
and with that, you and satoru shared the same sad smile you could utter at that moment. sure, this night will end bittersweet, but tomorrow is a brand new start.
you watched satoru walk solemnly towards the car. he looked like a ghost wandering around the vicinity without any will to search for the true paradise for him to rest. it really broke your heart that this is the end for both of you.
and with now fully signatured divorce paper on his hands, satoru felt that each step he took, he felt like fainting on the spot because of how devastating he felt.
but you cannot undo everything now. satoru had officially become your sweet memory and a stranger on the street at the same time. just as he was about to go inside the car, you called out for his name one last time.
your ex-husband looked at you with tired, red, and puffy eyes. you let yourself give the bestest smile you could offer at this moment. a smile entitled one last smile before saying a goodbye.
"if we found each other in another world, let me be your wife again!"
satoru's eyes glisten with tears once more. nevertheless, he also offers you the bestest smile he could manage. he is now letting his broken heart go out of your grasp. forcing himself to swallow and accept that in this lifetime, you are no longer his.
but if the two of you would be reborn or somewhere in the multiverse, he would pray that the two of you got the life you onced failed to build, and that was something he would wish for forever.
"of course! and i will choose you this time. we would make a family that we once dreamt of, and i will give you the honor to name our children." satoru yelled back, making your smile widen.
you could finally rest knowing that there would be a lifetime waiting for both of you somewhere in the future. and this time, you are not being delusional because you know it'll be going to happen and you'll make it happen.
"emi!"
"what?" satoru halted his steps to focus his attention on you.
"i want our first born daughter to be named emi." you've actually dreamed of having a child with him, in that dream, her name is emi. it was like a sign to you, so when you woke up, you immediately searched its meaning and found out that emi means blessed.
you are blessed.
both of you definitely feel blessed to have each other.
that being said, you have kept that name for a while now. sooner, you wished that name would be used with satoru's surname entangled to it.
because in this life, it was unfortunate not to use the name emi. you only want to use that name with him and only him. for you lived with him, loved him, and dreamed with him.
but patience is a virtue. you are willing to wait for that dream, for him. time is not a problem to you because you'd be fully patient just for him.
"have a safe journey, gojo satoru. i will be waiting for you in our next lives." you gently bow your head to send your wish for his safety.
with that, satoru enters the car without looking at you anymore. he was afraid that if he looked at you, he might find himself running back into your loving arms again.
"we'll be going now, y/n." higuruma rolled the window and waved a farewell to you.
you just nod at him while you watch the car slowly disappear from your eyesight. sad but true, you will be waking up all alone from now on 'till your thirties.
no more satoru to wake you up with cuddles. no more satoru who would make corny jokes randomly. no more satoru to who would always remind you that you have a husband. just no more satoru gojo—
drip…
a tear, followed by another, and another until it just flows uncontrollably. you are finally a crying-mess. you're letting yourself cry and let your emotions out by a shout of pain escaping out from your lips.
it was all over.
satoru chooses his life over you, and you choose satoru over your life. with your knees planted on the pavement, your hand travels towards your mouth to cover your loud painful sobs.
all of the tears that you had been keeping since this morning, finally had their freedom to flow at your cheeks along with anguish scream that came out of your broken heart.
you finally lost this time.
[a special chapter will be posted soon, so stay tuned and just comment if you want to be added on the taglist for this one — ©luvvixu2024]
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xxsabitoxx · 11 months
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My Personal Upper Moon 🍆 Ranking
Warnings: if it isn’t obvious already, this post is taking about the Upper Moon’s and my personal HC on their dick sizes. If that makes you uncomfortable in any way, just keep scrolling
A/N: I was actually very surprised by the amount of comments on my Hashira version of this HC post. So I feel a little more comfortable with giving the Upper Moons a go, especially since someone asked if I would do it eheheh. That being said, these men are demons, therefore you may find my size rankings to be a bit unrealistic. But I’m not gonna go crazy and say Muzan has a dick that’s 2 miles long.
This post includes: Muzan, Kokushibo, Douma, Akaza, Hantengu’s clones (Karaku, Urogi, Sekido and Aizetsu), Gyutaro and Kaigaku. And no Gyokko cause that man doesn’t have a dick, period.
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In a category of his own: Muzan Kibutsuji
Muzan clearly deserves a category of his own for one particular reason: he’s able to alter his appearance.
Therefore, he’s able to change the size of his dick whenever the fuck he feels like it.
And don’t try and say that stupid cause he can literally change gender and age so changing his dick size isn’t out of the question
On average, Muzan prefers to have a larger dick, mostly because he’s a pussy ass bitch man that needs that kind of confidence down there, if you get what I mean.
Typically soft: 10.5
Typically hard: 11.7
But he can make it as big, small, curved, wide, as he wants
When he wants to torture your ass, he’ll make himself as girthy as he sees fit just to watch you cry and squirm and beg for something a little smaller.
Anytime you get “comfortable” he just increases his girth until you’re crying again. Your pleasure is never his first priority, it’s always his.
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1. Kokushibo
Among the demons, it should be no shock that Upper Moon One has always been packing. This man is petrifying so it’s only right that his dick is equally as intimidating as him
Even as a human, this man’s dick was deadly. You can’t change my mind either.
Just in case you’re wondering, Yoriichi is bigger
That’s beside the point, Kokushibo has a lot to work with down there. Whether it’s hard or soft ngl
When soft: 9.5
When hard: 10.7
He’s long, girthy and curves slightly upwards. He’s heavy too, your jaw will certainly hurt by the time you’re done with him.
He’s the type to put a pillow or blanket of some sort under your lower back as he fucks you. Mostly because he’s not clueless to the fact that his dick is big
Kokushibo is the type to ease you into it though, he’s stern but he has a teeny bit of empathy when it comes to fucking you. Unless you’ve pissed him off ofc.
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2. Akaza
I know this one is gonna be controversial, especially since I’m putting him above Douma but hear me out.
This man has audacity, which means he got a big dick. No demon is acting like Akaza and having a small dick to go with it. Nuh uh, no sir.
Akaza is sitting pretty knowing damn well his cock is bigger than Douma’s and it actually something Douma taunts him with… which you think the roles would be reversed but hey…
When soft: 8.5
When hard: 9.7
He’s straight, no real curve to him and he has a single blue line going up the underside of his shaft and one that wraps around just before the head of his dick. Like as in the lines that cover his body lol
Akaza is probably the “gentlest” of all the upper moons because of the respect he has for women
That’s not to say he isn’t rough with you, but he definitely cares about your pleasure and feelings more than Douma or Muzan would for example
He’s pretty confident in himself though, at least that’s how it seems to you. He knows what he’s doing to say the least
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3. Douma
Alright listen, this man is still packing down there so don’t get mad at me for putting him at third.
His dick is smaller than Akaza’s but not by a ton. Let’s be honest Douma is probably the straightest and gayest demon to ever exist. The embodiment of bisexual LMAO
How does Douma know Akaza’s dick is bigger? The world may never know
When soft: 8
When hard: 9.2
It’s pale like the rest of him, a pretty noticeable curve to it as well. He has some prominent veins because of how pale he is. His tip is like a pinkish gray (idk why I felt the need to include this)
He’s pretty girthy too, so he definitely will make your walls stretch uncomfortably if he doesn’t offer you foreplay
Douma is rough, selfish and truly only cares about his own pleasure but he likes watching you whine and squirm while being impaled on his cock
Douma also has a thing for “belly bulges” so he will fuck you in some odd positions if he means he can see his dick from the outside… if ya know what I mean
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4. Gyutaro
Listen, plz just listen cause I promise you I’m going somewhere with this. Cause I can already hear y’all being like ???Scrawny ass Gyutaro is in 4th??? Yes. He is.
Gyutaro got himself a bit of an upgrade when becoming a demon. He for sure does not look like he did a a human. By that I mean he’s taller than he was (even tho he’s hunched)
What I’m tryna get at is demon transformation made his dick bigger and Imma live in my little fantasy world
When soft: 6.5
When hard: 7.2
Gyutaro’s dick is as curved as his spine and as thick as his tiny ass waist. He’s got length but not crazy girth.
Even if he’s rough, it feels good. Like there isn’t a ton of discomfort if he goes in raw with no prep cause he wants to punish you, he’s like the perfect amount of stretch
He’s mean, verbally and physically but at the same time he’s a fucking sucker for your body so he can’t really say much without whining and groaning
He’s got some confidence in his cock but he’s also a bit envious of the other upper moons
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5. The Hantengu Clones (Sekido, Karaku, Aizetsu, Urogi)
I’ve talked about my dick HCs for these four in my A-Z NSFW alphabet and I was tryna be realistic. However, when it comes to this post, fuck being realistic.
Sekido when soft 6.2 | when hard 7.1
Karaku when soft 6 | when hard 6.9
Urogi when soft 5.9 | when hard 6.7
Aizetsu when soft 5.7 | when hard 6.5
There is so much to say here but honestly my brain is malfunctioning so I can’t even delve into it
Regardless, the four of these demons fuck very differently and use their dicks very differently
Sekido and Urogi have no curve, Karaku has a slight curve and Aizetsu’s curves upwards
Hantengu himself had a 3 inch dick and you can’t tell me otherwise. Pussy ass bitch
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6. Kaigaku
I hate this little bitch but I’m including him so I can rag on his fugly ass. Kaigaku simps I’m sorry but I can’t stand him
This douche has the smallest dick among the upper moons. This is full Kaigaku slander.
When soft: 5.2
When hard: 6
I’ll give him a decent dick tho cause boy does he have the fucking audacity
That’s all I’m gonna give y’all cause I ain’t wasting my time on him GOOD BYE I didn’t even tag is ass
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secretwritingspot · 6 months
Text
Sleepless Nights- Soft Ending
Pairing: OPLA Sanji x Reader
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Rating/Content Warnings: E/18+ yeah I know I know, FINALLY SOME ACTUAL PORN from the smut writer. But yeah there's...not really fully sex because this is the softer ending but there is something. You'll see.
Summary: The soft ending of Sleepless Nights, Sanji *ahem* helps out Reader with getting to sleep.
Disclaimer(s): Like said above, this definitely isn't full smut like you might be expecting (don't worry, the rough ending gets a LOT more explicit but shh don't tell anyone I told you that). But that said, I'm still quite fond of it and hope y'all will be too!
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"...come here."
His words are barely a whisper when he speaks, keeping his voice as soft and comforting as he can for the time being. He's in motion before you can process it, moving to sit down on one of the galley's more comfortable couches and patting the seat next to him.
Distantly, you feel yourself nod wordlessly and when you swallow, your throat feels tight and your head slightly fuzzy. You can feel your cheeks heating up but everything feels far away and blurry as you sit next to him and stare down, fidgeting with your sleeves.
You don't know how to make the first move or what to expect, if anything, and pray he's better at clearing the awkward tension than you are.
"Can I touch you?"
Though the look in his eyes is almost pleading, his voice stays gentle. He needs you to be certain about this. Needs to know he can have this and wake up able to look at himself in a mirror the morning after.
You nod and hope it's answer enough, your words failing you for the second time that night.
Thankfully it is, and he smiles gently at you like you're a work of art, the most perfect thing he's ever seen. He pulls you into his lap and wraps his free arm around you so that your back is cuddled into his chest as he keeps his voice close, low and comforting.
"Relax, sweetheart. Just relax."
He moves his other hand to your chin and turns your face upwards towards him, and when you finally meet his eyes his breath hitches in his throat.
Breathless. Somehow, you always render him breathless.
Before he can think any better of it he leans down and kisses your jaw, continuing to reassure you along the way as he peppers kisses across your skin. "Take a breath," he instructs gently, pausing for a few seconds before pulling you closer again, his kisses slowly moving down your throat.
Whether it's his words or the affectionate way he touches you, it works- you sigh shakily and relax into his arms, taking a deep breath as you close your eyes and melt into the gentle attention.
You...haven't gotten attention like this in a long, long time.
It makes sense, none of you have. After all, you've been on a ship for months, none of you with a partner on board. It could get...lonely, missing that kind of affection for so long. Even among friends.
Sanji himself was no exception.
His soft hands move up your arms, then across your collarbone. Sanji had an inkling that you had been feeling lonely, and you may not have mentioned it, but it was something he'd always known about you. It made his heart hurt thinking about it- you seemed like the type that could be a bit...needy.
"Shh, that's right darling, just like that. Relax for me, pretty girl."
Still, Sanji knew that those types - people who were needy, who craved affection and love - they don't do so well on pirate ships, even with a crew as lovely as theirs. And it's no shock, really. The sea could get lonely, especially with no one to hold you. But he does his best to make up for that now, all soft touches and softer words. It's hard for him to stop some of his deeper feelings for you from slipping their way into his strings of praise, but he tries.
One of his hands toys with the hem of your shirt before slipping underneath, placing a hand lightly on the bare skin of your waist. You can't help but gasp quietly at the initial, almost overwhelming warmth of his hand on the bare skin of your waist and Sanji coos softly, pressing a kiss to your temple.
"Shhh, that's it, love. Let yourself feel it," he whispers with a small, fond smile as his fingers trail higher up your body, one arm wrapped comfortingly around your waist while the other starts to feel along the bottom edge of your bra. His hands move slowly, taking his time to get a feel for the fabric and all it's details.
To his joy, you do- letting your head fall back to lean against his shoulder with a sigh. He moves his other hand under your shirt with equal caution, not moving other than to get the thin fabric out of the way. The warm hand pressed flat to your stomach caresses reassuringly as the other seems adamant on memorizing every inch of the fabric under your shirt.
You try not to think about how right this all feels.
"I'm going to take good care of you, honey. I'll make sure you get your rest."
His voice is still quiet when he speaks, but now his words carry an undertone of something more raw as he whispers in your ear. His heart aches pleasantly at the way you relax into him, his hands tracing lazy, absent-minded shapes on your skin.
"...a pretty girl like you deserves more than a ship like this, you know."
He hides the emotional admission under an advancement of his touch, sliding a hand into the cup of your bra.
You dissolve into a soft, pretty sigh and arch slightly into his touch. His warm, soft words make you shiver- the idea that you deserve better, that somehow even this, the most wonderful you've felt in months, isn't good enough.
"This ship and I may never be worthy of your perfection, love. But if you need sleep, then you'll get it," he assures as his hand keeps working your chest as he whispers to you, thumbing gently at a nipple as he leans in to press his lips to your throat.
His affection surrounds you in an intoxicating way and you keen softly, melting into him. It feels like Sanji is everywhere- his lips on your neck, leaving affection in the form of peppered kisses as he lavishes you in praise and reassurance. His arms wrapped around you securely, his chest a safe haven to lean into. One of his hands caressing your chest as the other teases his fingers across the skin of your lower tummy, slowly working his way down. You feel completely enveloped in him, absorbed and protected and warm.
Your reaction only encourages Sanji, his words growing husky as things slowly become more intimate, more desperate.
"God, sweetheart. How long has it been since you've felt this way? Since you've had someone take care of you properly?"
"Don't know-"
You admit in a breathless whisper, gasping softly as his hand skates closer and closer to your panties.
His touch makes it hard for you to think, let alone speak. You feel floaty- hazy and fuzzy around the edges and tired, yes, but mostly just warm. He'll take care of you. He'll put you to sleep.
"A while."
"Too long," He whispers back almost immediately, the soft brush of his fingers now just on the edge of your panties. Sanji lets out a low groan at the thought of you being without someone for so long. Sanji was going to fix that.
"You going without this for any amount of time is too long. Let me make up for it, love. You deserve that much, at least."
You can't help but mewl in response to his words, especially now that his fingers are brushing over your panties. Finally, relievingly, he presses the heel of his palm down over your core, applying soft pressure in a way that makes you see stars. The breath leaves your lungs for a moment and you whimper breathlessly, melting.
His hand holds in place for a moment, making you squirm as he teasingly grinds his palm down on your clit. Sanji moves slowly but surely, making sure not to rush too quick. You had been waiting far too long, after all, so a nice slow burn before anything else was probably ideal.
"That feel good, sweetheart?"
You nod hastily, trying to construe just how good it feels before your voice finally comes back to you.
"Perfect," you answer in a breathless whisper, nuzzling into the space beneath his jaw. It really is, it's everything - the gentle pressure of his palm where you need him the most, rubbing in slow, steady circles that make you keen. His other hand massaging your chest, lips and teeth at your neck, nipping softly and whispering in your ear. " 's perfect, Sanji, please."
He hums happily in response, breath catching in his throat at the sight of you. You melt so easily at his touch, like butter in a pan. He thinks if he doesn't get you off right now so you can sleep peacefully he might die of regret, especially since you asked so nicely. He moves his palm in slow circles against your sweet spot in a way that makes you gasp, tracing his nose lightly along the cut of your jaw with a comforting whisper, voice raspy with desire.
"Shh, sweetheart, I've got you. I'll make it all better."
You can already feel yourself working your way up to something as your hips rock back against his hand instinctively and your thighs twitch.
It's so good, it's barely anything at all and yet it's so good, like sugary coffee late in the morning or the warmth of sunlight through windows or a million other things your mind is too tired to conjure right now. It feels like salvation, like a promise of well-earned rest.
Your breaths stutter and catch on the way out and soon each one is a needy whimper, thankful you're too exhausted to be loud as your voice reaches an embarrassingly desperate pitch.
"Shh, sweetheart, let it out," he soothes, tone encouraging and soft and entirely too much. "Come for me."
And you do, the request punctuated by Sanji starting to slowly speed up the circles that his palm grinds into your sex, other hand switching from caressing your curves and simply holding you to thumbing at your nipple at the same time.
The combination of the two feelings is all it takes to push you over the edge, breath catching in your throat with a desperate sort of relief as you finally come undone. It isn't anything intense, but it isn't meant to be- it washes over you in gentle waves, your exhaustion finally starting to sink in as you shiver, riding out the final ebbs and flows of the feeling.
Something about the subtlety of it make it the most beautiful thing Sanji's ever seen.
The way your voice cracks slightly on that final whimper, the way your hips continue to twitch into his palm as you ride it out, the way your thighs tremble and the rest of you just melts, going limp in his arms.
"Atta girl, sweetheart," he whispers, awe-struck.
He keeps moving his hand for a few more moments until your movements finally taper out and you start to relax more deeply against him. He can feel your heart beating, every soft breath, the exhaustion that now hangs in the air, thick and palpable.
In the soft, dark atmosphere of the galley, Sanji moves his hand back up to your waist and simply holds you, the other coming up to comb through your hair as he presses a kiss to your temple.
"You did so wonderfully."
Your only real response to the whispered praise is to hum in satisfaction and mumble something you think was supposed to be words, but you really aren't sure, your sleeplessness finally starting to catch up with you as you're slipping quite quickly.
You're clingy when you come down, he notices, and tucks that fact away in his mind for later when he's feeling romantic. You nuzzle your head into his chest and stay curled up, eyes still closed like you have every intention of falling asleep right then and there.
He would let you, he realizes, looking down at you with a near painful warmth in his chest. Happily.
"...sweet dreams, my love."
He whispers, keeping his voice as quiet as possible to avoid rousing you from the nap you've slipped into and pulling you even closer against him. Though he knows you're already asleep, he can't help but run his fingers through your hair and press tender kisses against your forehead. It's only a few moments later, once his focus is no longer entirely on taking care of you, that his nose twitches.
An odd, acrid smell fills his lungs and permeates the room. Smoke. Something that should be comfortingly familiar twists with the undercurrent of something gone wrong and he cocks his head in an attempt to identify the possible threat before his eyes go wide with an entirely different kind of panic.
Ah, fuck. The rest of the pastries.
605 notes · View notes
lilasamaaa · 18 days
Text
A lapse in judgement | Carlos Sainz x Reader
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Genre | Angst (of course), Hurt/Comfort, Fluff.
Word count | 3.8K
Warnings | Mention of sexual activities, rejection.
Summary | The long-awaited dinner with your in-laws doesn't go as planned... Will you and your boyfriend manage to change their minds about your relationship?
Author's note | I'm back, bitches! This lovely prompt was requested, thank you for the idea Anon! I hope you all like it, please let me know what you think! ✨ (not proofread lmao)
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Being the new girlfriend after the one who got away fucking sucks. Even when your lover was the one to end things. It's quite something to be the girl after the one he was supposed to spend his life with. Get married with. Have kids with. You wouldn't wish anyone to be in your place. Yet, here you are, all because you fell in love with him. Carlos Sainz. Him and his doe eyes. His impeccable hair. His charming smile. Frankly, you didn't stand a chance.
You knew who he was, of course. Formula 1 is among your fondest childhood memories, sitting in front of the TV with your siblings and parents. Each Grand Prix was a household event, and you could never bring yourself to part with the Ferrari-colored jacket you wore every race Sunday. It's been years since you've fit into it, but the memory is too precious. So, yes, you knew who he was. And you recognized him immediately when he walked through the door of your workplace, sunglasses perched on his nose.
You don't follow Formula 1 as closely as before. Just enough to keep up with the news. You don't pretend not to know who he is. What's the point in pretending?
"Back from Monza already?" you ask, wiping your hands on a clean towel.
He smiles. A polite smile, but one that seems to indicate he's not keen on chatting. Or at least, not about that. You ask him what he'd like, and he asks for anything with soy milk in it. He orders two, to go, and you smile again. Okay, you think. Understood. The exchange lasts no more than two minutes, and soon, the driver exits the coffee shop, leaving behind a lingering woody scent.
Weeks pass without crossing paths with him again, and honestly, the encounter has completely slipped your mind. That one early morning, though, you're sitting at one of the café tables, contemplating new drinks, new recipes to implement based on some customer feedback, when the little bell chimes behind you. You definitely need to stop leaving the door open to let the floor dry after your morning cleaning session.
You turn around, ready to inform the friendly customer that the café doesn't open for another twenty minutes, when you catch his gaze.
"I know you're not open yet," he starts, putting both hands in front of him. "I saw the sign. But I really need some coffee, and all the other shops are closed."
"I suppose I can make an exception for such an emergency," you say as you rise from your seat, smiling kindly at him. "What can I get you?"
"I don't remember the name of what you made for me last time, but it was incredible. There was..."
"Soy milk?"
"Yeah."
"I'm on it," you say, turning around. "Two?" you ask, feeling like you already know the answer.
"Yes, please."
You hurry behind the bar, preparing the two coffees, and you place them in front of him a few seconds later. He takes out his phone to pay and places it on the terminal, which emits a soft "beep." Then, he picks up one of the coffees before sliding the second one towards you.
"This one's for you," he says, and you barely manage to hide your surprise.
"Oh," you say. "If I had known, I wouldn't have charged you for the second one."
"But it wouldn't have been the same, then. I wouldn't have offered it to you," the driver says, winking at you before taking a step back. "Thank you so much for the favor. Have a good day!"
With that, he's gone. As you sip your hot coffee slowly, you wonder when you'll see him again next time. But already, your employees arrive and pull you from your thoughts.
"That guy outside kinda looked like Carlos Sainz, no?" Lucia, one of them, asks while tying her apron.
"You've seen him? I thought so, too," you reply with a smile.
The next time you see him is the exact opposite. You've just bid your last employee a good evening, and you're putting the chairs up on the tables in preparation for the morning cleanup. A knock on the storefront makes you look up, and you smile when you see him. You open the door, and he slips inside, slightly damp from the light rain falling outside.
"Have you ever heard of opening hours?" you ask while wiping down the countertop.
"Can't say I have," he replies with a grin, the sight making your stomach flutter.
"I think congratulations are in order," you begin, throwing the towel over your shoulder. "That was a clean win in Singapore."
"Thank you. It might be a bit late for a coffee, but would you like to grab a drink with me?"
The proposition takes you by surprise.
"Like? Right now?"
"Yeah. Right now. I know a place not far from here."
"Aren't you afraid of being seen or something?" you ask, arching a brow.
"Never with beautiful women, no."
You chuckle, rolling your eyes. You've been living in Spain for ten years, yet you don't think you'll ever get used to the natural flirty nature of its inhabitants.
"Give me ten minutes to change and close up, and I'll join you," you say, while he nods, sitting on one of the bar stools.
Carlos takes you to a dancing bar, obviously run by friends since he spends five minutes shaking hands and greeting everyone as you enter. He leads you to the back of the bar, to a secluded corner where the music is much quieter, and you can actually have a conversation. You have no idea what to say. Where do you even start with a Formula 1 driver? Someone whose life is so different, so far removed from yours. Sensing your discomfort, Carlos takes the lead, asking you questions about your café, (Did you open it by yourself?) and about your life. (Where are you from? You have an accent).
The evening passes, and the drinks flow until you find yourselves tightly pressed together on the dance floor. You're back against his chest. His hands on your hips. Yours on his neck. Swaying to the rhythm of the music, all senses heightened. His lips don't take long to seek yours, and from the wall of the bar against which he pins you, you transition to his mattress, his warm body pressed against yours.
You don't sleep much that night. You don't know if you'll ever have the chance to see him again. To have him like that again. So, you lavish your lips on his, your body against his. And in the early morning, as you wake up entangled in each other's arms, and you almost expect him to kick you out... He climbs back on top of you instead, pressing warm kisses against your mouth, your collarbones, your navel... You arrive at the café thirty minutes late, with bags under your eyes. It's never happened before, and your employees are so surprised that none of them even think to joke about your poor state.
You don't hear a word from him for the next ten days. Occasionally, you glance at the app you downloaded, which informs you about upcoming races. You know he's in Qatar. You try not to let the little voice in your head win. The one that laughs at you. That tells you that you'll never see him again. He's working, you think. He's busy. Your life goes on, though you can't help but watch for him early in the morning and late at night, your eyes lingering on the storefront.
Then, one day, he comes back. Right in the middle of the shift. Seeing him walk into the café, Lucia lets out a scream and drops the cup she was holding. "Dios mio," she says, clutching her heart. Several seated customers turn around, but nobody seems to pay attention to the tall brunette with caramel eyes whose gaze is fixated on you, from across the counter.
"Soy milk?" you ask, trying to contain your smile.
"Yes, please. Only one."
And then, he starts coming every day. Every day he's not on the other side of the world, that is. By his seventh visit, Lucia can almost serve him his coffee without spilling any, her hands shaking so much.
Outside of the café, the two of you slowly start going to museums. To restaurants. To the cinema. But there's one place you both prefer. His bed. You spend hours there, exploring each other's bodies or talking about everything and nothing. Exchanging thousands of kisses or sharing your worst childhood embarrassments. Moaning against each other or talking about your very first pet. And one evening, as you were recounting how your respective parents had met, he asks you the question.
"Speaking of that, would you like to meet them?"
Your heart skips a beat. It's been six months since you've been seeing each other. Since you've been exclusive. Since you've been a couple, in reality, even if neither of you has dared to say the word. That one, and the other. The one that starts with an L. Even though you know you do... And you sense he does too.
"I don't know," you say, resting your head against his bare chest, listening to the steady rhythm of his heartbeat. "Have you talked to your family about us?"
"Of course," Carlos says, pressing a kiss to your head. "They know I've been seing someone. And they know it's serious."
"Do they even want to meet me?"
"They haven't asked, if that's your question," your boyfriend replies. "But they never have, with anyone. They know it's something I like to do at my own pace."
You nod, and a few minutes later, the fateful dinner is set for the following Saturday. Already, the ball of anxiety that has lodged itself in your stomach grows. And soon enough, you find yourself standing in front of the door of the imposing Sainz mansion, your throat tight and your hand sweaty in Carlos'.
"Relax," the driver says, pressing a soft kiss to your lips before stroking your thumb. "They're not that bad."
Carlos knocks on the door, and a young woman opens it before jumping into your boyfriend's arms. You recognize her instantly from the pictures in Carlos' phone. Blanca. As if pronouncing her name in your head had reminded her of your existence, Blanca turns her head, smiling politely in your direction.
"Nice to meet you," she says rather blankly before gesturing for you two to come inside.
You encounter his other sister, Ana, in the hallway a few seconds later. She isn't much warmer, not even offering a smile and simply saying "Welcome" before rushing to hug her brother. The reception from the two women surprises you a little, and doesn't really help you feel confident about the evening. Carlos doesn't seem phased by the situation, helping you out of your coat before guiding you to the living room where the two young women have already disappeared. You're about to walk through the door when your eyes stop on a series of frames hung across from the front door. Your heart skips a beat. Feeling you come to a halt, Carlos stops as well, following your gaze.
"Fucking hell," your boyfriend says before taking the frame off the wall and placing it upside down on the buffet below. "I'm sorry. This photo has been there for so long that they probably don't even notice it anymore," he adds, his tone apologetic.
You know he's trying to reassure you, but his words have the opposite effect. You've briefly talked about your exes. Well, more about his. Isa. The girl he was with for seven fucking years. The one his parents loved so much. Seeing a photo of them together right before meeting your in-laws is like a knife to the heart. A reminder that you're the new girl. The one replacing her. You muster a smile that you know is fake at Carlos before continuing on your way. As you arrive in the living room, his two parents stand up from the couch, rushing to their son to hug him.
The embraces last a few seconds, until they turn to you. You greet them politely, handing his mother a huge bouquet of flowers and his father a bottle of fine wine, as they thank you with strained smiles.
"I also brought chocolates from my shop for you," you continue, turning to his sisters sitting at the dining table. "They're from a small producer in Andalusia, a real treat..."
"How kind of you," Blanca says dryly.
You miss the glance that Carlos shoots his sister, behind you. A stern look. One that scream "be careful". One Blanca pretends not to see.
"Let's sit down," Carlos' mother announces, gesturing for everyone to take a seat.
Intimidated, you stick close to Carlos, sitting next to him. The table is beautiful, adorned with fine porcelain and various flowers. You smile as you spot silver napkin rings and pick up the one in front of you. Your next breath gets caught in your throat when your eyes land on the letters engraved in the metal. Isabel.
"Ah yes, sorry," Ana begins, following your gaze. "We didn't have time to make a new one. I hope you don't mind."
"It's fine," you say, looking up and smiling at her.
"So, dear, what do you do?" Carlos' father asks. "Carlos told us about a café, but we didn't quite understand."
"I opened my own café a few years ago. We also serve fresh pastries that I bake every morning. It's really taking off; I have several employees now, and I'm planning to open a second one soon..."
"Did you study culinary arts?" her mother asks.
"Uh, no, I don't have any degree," you reply with a nervous laugh. "School just wasn't my thing."
Ana and Blanca exchange a glance, and you lower your head, feeling your cheeks flush. You feel Carlos' hand on your thigh, and you cast him a grateful glance, which he doesn't see, his eyes fixed on his sisters.
"And so, the two of you met at the café, is that right?" his father resumes.
"Yes, that's right," you reply with a smile. "In May, the first time."
"In May?" Ana asks, looking at her brother. "Weren't you still with Isa?"
"Are we gonna mention her all night?" Carlos snaps.
"It's just a question, no need to get upset," Ana replies, rolling her eyes.
"Did you know who he was?" Blanca asks, holding your gaze.
"Uh, yeah, I recognized him. But I served him like any other customer," you recount.
"It must be weird," Ana continues, as your attention turns from her sister to her. "To see a celebrity walk into your little café."
"It's actually not so little," Carlos says. "It's pretty well-known in Madrid. Lots of customers."
"Never been," Blanca says curtly.
Carlos's mother gestures for her daughters to follow her, and the three women disappear in the kitchen before returning a few minutes later with their hands full of various dishes.
"Carlos told us you love to eat," his mother continues, giving you a genuine smile. "It's good that he didn't choose a very slender girl, for once," she adds, as you tilt your head. Was that supposed to be a compliment?
"What are your plans after the café?" Carlos' father asks, chewing on a piece of chicken. "Now that this first project has worked out?"
"I beg your pardon?" you ask, genuinely confused.
"What are you going to do with your life now?" Ana asks.
"Well... I'm going to keep running the café? It's my sanctuary, my biggest project. I'm so proud of it, I'm not going to give it all up now."
"Oh," his father replies, eyeing you. "I'd understood it was temporary. That you were a kind of investor."
"No," you reply, feeling your cheeks heat up again. "That's... That's what I do."
The silence falls over the table, punctuated by the clinking of utensils. After a short while, Carlos's mother clears her throat, meeting your gaze.
"Forgive our questions. We're curious to get to know the person Carlos shares his life with. You have to understand, after seven years... You always know what you've lost, but you can never know what you've gained."
"And that was quite a loss," Blanca chimes in, sipping on her wine.
"You can't trust anyone these days. You never know if they love you for you or for your wallet," Ana states, looking at her perfectly manicured nails.
"Or your contact list," Blanca adds, shooting a glance your way.
"Okay," Carlos suddenly says, throwing his napkin on the table before getting up. "That's enough. We're leaving."
"What?" you say, looking up at him.
"They're clearly not ready for this. We'll come back when they finally understand that my ex is just that - my ex. Get your things, love."
You stand up, feeling your legs tremble, as Carlos' hand find the small of your back, pushing you towards the hallway.
"Don't be ridiculous," his mother says, standing up as well. "You can't expect us to forget seven years just like that."
"I'm not asking you to forget. I'm asking you to respect my partner. But apparently, that's too difficult."
A few seconds later, Carlos is backing out of his parents' driveway, one arm around your seat, his gaze fixed on the rear window. In the passenger seat, you fidget with your fingers, staring at your hands and biting your lip nervously. His brows are furrowed. Jaw clenched. None of you exchange a word until you hit the main road, headlights from passing cars casting shadows on your faces.
"I'm so sorry," he finally says, stroking your thigh. "If I had known..."
"You couldn't," you reply, placing your hand on his. "I don't blame them. Seven years is no small thing."
Turning his head, his gaze meets yours.
"I won't pretend that those seven years didn't matter to me, that they meant nothing. Even though I don't have any romantic feelings for her anymore, she will always be a part of me in some way," he says, as you feel your heart tighten in your chest. "But she no longer occupies my thoughts. She's no longer imprinted under my eyelids. It's not her fingers that give me chills, her voice that makes my heart race. All day long, I think about you. I talk about you. Even at night, I dream of you. You're right beside me, so close, and yet it's not enough. You still find a way to get closer, to flow through my veins, to infiltrate every breath, every heartbeat."
"Sometimes I wish I could see myself through your eyes. That girl sounds exceptional," you say, laughing as you wipe the tears from the corners of your eyes."
"She's quite something," he replies, eyes on the road. "I can't wait for them to realize."
After the disastrous first encounter with your in-laws, over six months pass before Carlos comes join you on the terrace of your shared hotel room in Jeddah, placing a coffee in front of you. Bending down to sit beside you, the pilot winces, a hand on his stomach.
"Are you okay?" you ask, running your hand through his hair.
"I feel so fucking sick," your boyfriend says, a painful grimace on his face.
"Shouldn't you see a doctor, babe?" you ask, stroking his arm. "You look awfully pale. And you haven't eaten since yesterday morning."
"I can't keep anything down," Carlos replies, throwing his head back before closing his eyes.
"Carlos Sainz Vázquez de Castro," you start, earning a small grin from your boyfriend.
"I just love when you call me that."
"There's no way you're getting in that car tomorrow," you insist.
You didn't think you'd be so right. Well, not to this extent. Hurrying through the corridors of the hospital, two large aluminum trays in each hand, you dodge doctors and nurses along the way, weaving through visitors until you reach the door marked with the number you're looking for. You knock on the door, slipping inside before turning around to close it behind you.
"I wasn't sure what you'd prefer, so I got both," you begin, still facing the door, handle in hand. "The paella was quite easy to find, but I admit I had to cross the entire city for..." your sentence dies in your throat when, turning around, your eyes meet those of your mother-in-law. Then your father-in-law's. And your two sisters-in-law, crowded in Carlos' small hospital room.
"Oh," you utter, eyes wide. "I'm so sorry. I didn't know you'd be there. I'll leave you alone," you start, turning around once again.
"No! Stay," Carlos' mother says, rising to take the trays from you.
"We're really happy to see you again," his father says, rising as well to embrace you. "Carlos was telling us how well you took care of him. Thank you so much for being there."
"That's the least I could do," you reply, feeling intimidated. "He would have done the same for me."
"I may love you, but I'm not sure I would have slept in that armchair. Or changed your blood-soaked bandage," Carlos replies, eyes half-closed, still under the influence of anesthesia.
"You did what?" Blanca asks, turning to look at you, eyes wide.
"Well, his nurse was busy and it started leaking," you shrug.
"You slept here?" his father asks.
"They wouldn't let me at first, but I didn't feel like leaving him alone in a foreign hospital."
"She annoyed the staff so much they just gave up on throwing her out," your boyfriend lets out in a laugh.
"I didn't annoy anybody," you reply quickly, fearing what his family might think.
"You threatened an intern to tie yourself to the chair."
"I didn't do that," you half-laugh, shooting your boyfriend a warning look.
Seated on the side of Carlos' bed, bickering with your boyfriend while running your hand through his hair in a loving gesture, you don't see the glance exchanged between the Sainz family.
"We were thinking about something, before you arrived..." Ana begins, her eyes finding yours. For the first time, you're not met with her harsh, cold gaze, but with gentle eyes. "We have a family house in Mallorca. We thought it would be nice to all go there together, so Carlos can recover in peace. We would be very happy if you joined us."
"It'll be a chance for us to get to know you. And to apologize for our pathetic behavior last time."
"Carlos chose you," his mother starts, smiling warmly at you. "And we all understand why."
You could cry with happiness at the thought of finally being accepted, being welcomed into the family of the person you've shared your life with for almost a year now. At no longer being the new girl. The one after the love of his life.
At the though of maybe, simply being the one.
The real one, this time.
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henrioo · 10 months
Text
✦ ── THE MORNING AFTER: EUSTASS KID AND KILLER
Relationships: Eustass Kid x Gn! Reader x Killer (Poly), Kid x Killer (Suggested)
Synopsis: What would it be like to wake up only to discover that you didn't sleep with one crewmate, but two!
Warnings: Mention of sexual intercourse, waking up naked among people without clothes, mention of drunk (consenting) sex, mention of regret, mention of consequences, Soft Kid and Killer, Healthy Relationship, Polyamorous Relationship, Threesome
Word Count: 1,0k
Notes: Oh yeah baby, I really love this duo, this is the first part of a "series" of waking up the next day with a trio, I plan to do more now that I'm back but to debut we have my favorites, the next ones will probably be Zoro and sanji or Luffy and Law, hope you like it
ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ• ────── ✦ ────── •
It was so soft and warm… You were under a hard surface, but it was so hot that it somehow became soft? There was something around your waist and it warmed you even more. There was a layer of soft blanket under you and everything felt even better, when was the last time you slept so well? His bed wasn't even that comfortable...
Yes, your bed was not comfortable… For some reason it was a hard mattress that you always said you would change on the next island you stopped on, but you always forgot and continued on the hard bed. Also, what was that breath on your neck? Breathing? Weren't you alone?!
Still groggy and confused, you forced yourself to open your eyes to try to figure out where the hell you fell asleep this time. His head began to throb and hurt as his eyes got used to the low light in the room, the windows were covered, preventing the sun's rays from illuminating everything.
You yawned loudly and shifted, or at least you tried to since there was something… someone holding you in place. You looked around and your face burned as your jaw dropped open in shock. You were lying on the chest of none other than Eustass Kid, your captain. Also, around your waist and curled around you like a puppy was Killer, the first mate.
You suppressed a scream and began to rummage through your memories in search of what had happened. You remembered very little, you had entered a drinking contest, won and then tried to stumble back to the ship to sleep. At some point you met Killer who would help you get back safely, maybe you found Kid on the ship, but nothing really explained how you ended up there.
And to make matters worse… Where were your clothes? Oh no… You couldn't believe you made a cliché like that, did you even sleep with your superiors just because you were drunk?!
Killer squeezed your waist a little more and settled on your back, you felt a shiver running through your body. Of course, you couldn't deny that they were very attractive and maybe you had a crush on them, besides obviously, it was a celebration night and the three of you must have been completely drunk and crazy… But still, that shouldn't have happened!
Not that you didn't want to… On the contrary, what situation would that put you in?! Would your peers say you were trying to curry favor? What if the two got mad and threw you off the ship?! There were so many possibilities for everything to go wrong that her head started to spin…
But you couldn't deny it, being there, in the grip of Killer's arms and the comfort of Kid's body was so lovely. You definitely wouldn't use that word for anything related to those two monstrous men, but it felt so right.
"Fuck my head" you heard Kid mumbling and closed your eyes at the time, maybe it would be better to just pretend you were sleeping.
He shifted a bit until he realized where he was, then there was silence until he finally spoke.
"Y/n" you bit your lip, that he didn't realize you were sleeping, it was his wish "I know you're awake" Damn! How did he know?!
"Captain…" you mumbled shyly and opened your eyes to stare at him. There was no negative emotion in that gaze, no anger, no disgust, he just stared at you... peacefully?
"Shut up, I still don't want to wake up" Killer said and then he buried his head in your neck and inhaled deeply, making you shiver and let out a small cry of fright.
"Killer, let go, they don't want to" Kid spoke quickly and not long after Killer released you with a disappointed mutter.
"Sorry" he said and then sat down on the bed.
You stood there looking confused at both of them, what was going on?
"You can go back to your room, let's not say anything to anyone" Kid said and yawned again, wasn't he going to tell? Did he… had he regretted it?
"Are we just going to pretend this didn't happen?" You let out with some sadness, you couldn't help but show your disappointment… Were you really that bad?
"Well, it's not exactly weird Killer waking up in my bed" Kid said teasing the other man who just swore under his breath "But by the look of you you definitely didn't want to be here, so let's just pretend it didn't happen, blah blah, you know" he said with little patience.
"But… What if I wanted to be here?" You said in a sad whisper. It was no secret to many that you really wanted both men, you just hadn't done anything imagining that your superiors would never hook up with their own subordinates.
"You want?" It was Killer who spoke, turning and facing you, at least that's what it looked like since his bangs covered his eyes.
"Maybe…" you said nervously and sat up, using the blanket to cover yourself.
"So does that stuff you said yesterday about you being in love with us being true?" Kid said, staring at you deathly.
"I said that?!" You screamed in shock, you had assumed that while drunk?!
"No" he smirked "But by your reaction it's true…"
"You idiot…" you cursed in embarrassment.
"So… Can we go back to sleep?" Killer said approaching you "Let's deal with the romantic talk after coffee"
"Yes definitely" Kid said and pulled you back into his chest, Killer then clung to you again.
"So…" you said after a few minutes of silence "If Killer is already a regular here… Can I be too?" That was her request to try and turn something from one night into much more, you had the chance to have those two men in your hand and you weren't going to waste it.
"You don't even have to ask, we're tired of hearing you complain about your bed" Killer said happily.
"Yeah, now shut up and go to sleep or I'll expel you both" Kid yelled with his eyes closed.
"Ah… And y/n" Killer whispered in his ear "We love you too…"
736 notes · View notes
idyllic-affections · 10 months
Text
achilles heel.
summary. the ninth harbinger takes on an... unexpected responsibility.
trigger & content warnings. references to poverty, [name] is a thief (at first), slightly ooc pantalone in some parts.
tropes, pairings, fic length, & other notes. fluff, slight angst, hurt/comfort. pantalone & child/young teen!reader, arlecchino & child/young teen!reader. 3.4k words. they/them pronouns for reader. this fic is divided into six drabble-like sections.
author's thoughts. inspired by a silly conversation @aroacenezha and i had. i dad-ify this man a little too much but you know what? i will keep doing it idc he's so dad-able. this post is structured differently than my usual content but i think it's kind of cool!!!
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i. an unexpected guest ♡
       Of all the possible unexpected things that could await the Regrator in his Snezhnaya residence—one of them, at least; the amount of properties he owned was certainly more than what one could count on both hands—this was... most definitely among one of the more shocking.
       He was speechless, really.
       "Please do humor me. How did you manage to get in?"
       Of all the unexpected things that could await the Regrator in his his home, in his office of all places... thievery in and of itself wasn't unexpected; rather, it was the fact that standing in front of him was undoubtedly a child no older than fourteen. Not only that, but additionally the fact that they were actually standing in his office. They had not been caught. A child, no older than fourteen, possessed more skill than all of the others in the past who had made poor attempts to steal from him.
       "You need better security"—they shrugged, making him somewhat annoyed at their nonchalance—"I really thought it would be hard to rob the richest man on Teyvat. It was harder to rob Lady Ningguang. I actually had to abandon that job, you know? Couldn't get to the Jade Chamber."
       Again, he was left absolutely speechless.
       Being compared to Ningguang made a bitter taste settle in his mouth. He made a mental note to drastically improve the quality of his security.
       "You..."
       "What? It's not my fault all of your agents are incompetent."
       They weren't wrong, he supposed. His agents surely could do better at their jobs. Their smugness still irritated him, though. "Do you routinely rob the wealthy?"
       They scoffed. "You all are hoarding wealth that should never have been yours in the first place. Archons forbid I steal from wicked people who couldn't possibly care less about anyone but themselves... Get over yourself. Seriously."
       He genuinely couldn't tell if they had no sense of danger or if they simply had that sheer amount of audacity by nature. Though, admittedly, he did have to respect the fact that they managed to sneak in completely undetected. If not for his sudden appearance, they most likely would have gotten away with it. Their audacity did irk him a little, but... that was also something he had to respect. It was impressive in its own right. No average Snezhnayan child would so much as dream of talking to a Harbinger the way they did oh-so effortlessly
       It did occur to him, however, that they did not look well-off; they were not the average Snezhnayan child.
       Their hair looked as if it had been haphazardly and unevenly chopped off so that it was too short to become tangled (he did recall doing such a thing himself—at the lowest point in his life, taking care of his hair was a useless endeavor, solely because it did not help better his chances of survival). They were clothed decently enough in layers adequately thick to keep themselves from freezing which, indeed, was also something he understood on a nauseously personal level.
       Most of the mora he managed to earn in his unfortunate youth was invested in... not freezing to death. Through them, he was forced to once again acknowledge his past, a past he endeavored to forget about because it made him feel pathetic.
       ...Or maybe it made him feel like an impostor in his wealth?
       What kind of sick twist of fate had the Archons cursed him with, forcing him to think about such trivial things?
       He should punish them. He should arrest them. He should send them off to Dottore and never spare them another thought ever again, even, but... somehow, he didn't want to. Much as he may have acted as if he couldn't possibly know why, he did.
       The brat reminded him sickeningly of himself.
       "Where do you think you're going?"
       They were half out of his window when he called out to them, having taken advantage of his pondering.
       "To sell what I've taken?"
       He almost rolled his eyes. Almost, but didn't. That would have been immature and inelegant of him. "Come here."
       They would have just left, but truthfully, it would not have been a smart move on their behalf. The only reason they had not yet been caught and apprehended was simply because no-one had spotted them in the first place. Not a single one of their 'victims' had managed to catch a glimpse of them. Now that a Harbinger had seen them...
       They figured it was in their best interests to avoid being pursued by anyone with that much power, especially by someone like Pantalone. A man with that much political influence was dangerous.
       "Show me what it is that you've taken."
       They did.
       A letter opener, a few picture frames... Nothing significant or extremely expensive (though, to them, anything at all from his office would likely be of high value), which is what left Pantalone completely perplexed. He honestly hadn't even noticed that anything was missing from his office when he had first entered.
       Perhaps that was what made them so skilled, combined with their capacity to avoid being seen.
       "Out of everything you could have taken," he mused, "you chose... these inconsequential items?"
       "They're inconsequential to you, maybe. To me and to my buyers, things like this are worth a ton. Whether I'll actually be given what is owed is... uh. More or less likely. I don't know, I just— can I leave yet?"
       "Not so fast, dear." He smiled, tilting his head slightly. They thought he somewhat resembled a fox.
       "...What? Are you seriously going to arrest me for something so little?"
       "Nothing of the sort. In fact... I have a proposal of sorts for you."
ii. the proposal in question. ♡
       "You know, when someone says something ominous like 'I have a proposal for you'," they began, twirling a defiant strand of their now neat hair—which the Harbinger had... shockingly, taken upon himself to cut properly rather than paying someone else to do it—around their finger, "they generally don't mean... all this."
       "Don't be difficult." He pinched their cheek like a scolding (or affectionate, but the nature of his gesture was debatable, given the fact that he tended to hide his thoughts behind a skilled mask of eerie calmness that they could only imagine took years to perfect) grandparent might. "Let the tailor take your measurements."
       "Ugh... fine. I don't even see why I'm doing this," they murmured, gingerly raising their arms when the tailor politely prompted them to.
       "Oh? Did I not say? My apologies. I intend for you to become a permanent resident of my household."
       Silence.
       "...So you're adopting me."
       "That is one way to look at it, yes."
       "Oh. I was... um." They paused, blinking a few times as if in an attempt to dispel the bewilderment they felt. "I was kidding. I didn't expect that response."
       He only smiled.
       They wondered if they would ever learn to understand that ambiguous smile.
iii. another unexpected guest ♡
       Between teaching the newest member of his house noble etiquette, conversational skills, and other important skills they would need to master, Pantalone had grown unexpectedly fond of the little orphan he took in.
       He should have been annoyed by how often they questioned his authority, by how unruly they were...
       Of course, he wasn't. It was endearing and even refreshing in its own way—when was the last time anyone had dared to speak so freely and honestly and daringly to him? The respect rooted in fear that his status as a Harbinger gave him became dull after a while.
       It really shouldn't have surprised him that he had become so fond of the little one who did not fear speaking in the most unfiltered way to him.
       However... he did wonder if his fondness was causing him to spoil them just a little too much.
       "...What is that?"
       They grinned brightly. In their arms, a small arctic fox sat contentedly, strangely unbothered by the fact that a random child decided to pick it up and bring it home. It seemed to snuggle further into them and their warmth, in fact.
       "It's an arctic fox!"
       "My dear, that is a wild animal."
       "And?"
       Silence. Pantalone was the first to break it:
       "I have the ability to acquire any animal you so desire of only the highest pedigree," he began, "the best available on the market—of course, assuming it could survive in an extreme climate such as this one—and yet, you chose to bring home a little street fox?"
       They pouted, lower lip jutting out in an exceedingly childish way that he would have chided them for had it not just been himself, them, and the various Fatui guards stationed around (who all knew far better than to say anything about whatever they saw or heard within their Lord's residence) present. "Don't be mean. I came from the street too, you know... look at her! Look at this little creature! Say hi."
       If it had been anyone else demanding such childish things of him, he would be appalled... but he supposed since it was them, he could tolerate it. He leaned down slightly.
       "Hello."
       Much to his apparent surprise, the fox barked back at him, to which they giggled.
       "Soo, can I keep her?"
       The silence returned for a brief second. Then, the Harbinger sighed deeply—it was undoubtedly comparable to the kind of sigh an exasperated parent might let out. As if he wasn't already going grey enough without this child around...
       He caved to their whims regardless.
       He was encouraging a bad habit, yes, but they looked so happy with that little fox. He could only hope that, in the future, they would not bring home any other wild animals.
       "Very well, but I expect you to learn how to take care of her properly, otherwise I will be forced to let her go."
iv. old habits die hard.
       The first event they ever had to attend with the Regrator was an annual event hosted by the Tsaritsa herself.
       Much as they weren't exactly... keen on going, Pantalone insisted—he had claimed it was for publicity's sake. The public would favor him more if he was seen as the caretaker of a child. They supposed they couldn't really argue with that, but the thought of being used as a device to build public rapport was uncomfortable at best and nauseating at worst.
       (He was very adamant on reassuring them that he didn't take them in solely for such a shallow reason. Though... he still did not tell them why exactly it was that he chose to take them in, which admittedly did make them doubt the sincerity of his words.
       They decided to give him the benefit of the doubt, given how kind he tended to be with them.)
       They absolutely hated being surrounded by so many pompous rich people who only ever turned a blind eye to the struggling of every low-income family in Snezhnaya. How these people could live with themselves, hoarding the majority of the wealth of an entire nation, they would never know nor understand.
       (What made Pantalone any different, they sometimes wondered?)
       However...
       They were all viable targets, even including the other Harbingers present.
       Columbina... there was nothing they could steal off of her without getting caught, and the idea of making a scene, especially one involving the third Harbinger herself, made their stomach churn anxiously. She was not an option.
       Dottore... stealing off of him was unwise. They wondered if Pantalone would lose favor in them if they did. The Doctor, like the Damselette, was not an option, despite the many things they could take off his person without him ever knowing that something was missing (probably; they weren't truly sure if they'd like to test that theory).
       Arlecchino... her silver hairclip was awfully pretty. Surely she wouldn't miss it? She didn't like the Regrator much anyways, so—
       "Dear."
       "Oh. Um." They cleared their throat, embarrassedly looking anywhere but at him. They tried their best not to pick at the threads of their sleeves. "Sorry. Force of habit."
       He hummed, gloved hand raising up to rub reassuring circles on their back. The bubbling anxiety and discomfort in their chest subsided slightly.
       "Come along. There is nothing to be afraid of, and please... do not take anything off of anyone. Leave the Knave and the other Harbingers be."
       Of course, upon passing Arlecchino, they did end up stealing her hairclip regardless.
       Though annoyed, she said nothing of it, because even though their audacity to steal something from a Harbinger at an event such as that one agitated her beyond belief...
       It seemed to make them happy, and she didn't see them take anything from anyone else the entire night. She decided that she would let it slide just this one time.
       (She also took it upon herself to secure it in their hair—which had grown longer and healthier ever since the Ninth took them in—after the event, claiming that it was a gift from her...
       ...And that, if they knew what was good for them, they would not dare to pull another foolish stunt like that ever again.)
v. achilles heel.
       "What is it that plagues your mind?"
       "Huh?" They blinked, sitting up a little straighter in their place on one of the soft sofas in the Ninth's personal library. Most of their time was spent in there, absorbing all the knowledge that they didn't have access to earlier on in their life. "What do you mean?"
       "You've been withdrawn lately," Pantalone said, approaching them slowly as if they were some kind of skittish animal. He tenderly caressed their cheek upon seeing no signs of discomfort. "Have I done something to drive you away?"
       "...No," they admitted quietly, looking outside of the large window and watching the snow fall. It looked... peaceful, but they knew from experience what it was really like out there. They gnawed on their lower lip, searching for a way to word their concerns without sounding ungrateful. "I just... ugh, it's nothing. I don't know. I don't know how to say it without it sounding... bad."
       He raised an eyebrow. His hand moved away from their face, now stroking their hair calmingly. "You speak to me so freely all the time. Why the sudden change of heart, hm?"
       He did have a point there. They never once thought twice about the way they spoke to him up until that point.
       A sigh left their lips, and they shifted their gaze to meet his.
       The way their eyes glistened with the sheen of unshed, frustrated tears made Pantalone feel a sort of fatherly protectiveness that he wasn't sure he should have been able to feel, and yet... their expression flipped some kind of switch in him.
       "Why did you take me in?"
       "I—"
       "Wait, I'm not done," they interrupted. He went quiet. "What benefit do I provide to you? What kind of rich guy sees a random orphaned thief and decides to take them in? Who does that? No rich person I've met before you, that's for sure. People like you don't care about those of us barely scraping by in poor conditions, so why—"
       If it were anyone else Pantalone was speaking to, his tone would have been harsh and commanding, but... that was how it always had been with them. They could get away with things that others could not. They were always shown a side of him that others were not. Perhaps that made them the Regrator's one single Achilles heel, and if that were the case? So be it.
       "Stop. Listen."
       His tone came out very gently. It was more akin to a comforting hush than a demand. He kneeled down to their height—never once had they seen him voluntarily get so close to the ground. Most nobles didn't, and yet, here he was. With his ungloved knuckles, he wiped away the tears that they hadn't even noticed were beginning to fall.
       "I was you once, little one."
       "I don't believe you," they sniffled.
       "You should. I was not born into this life. My bloodline is not noble and my birth name holds no significance," he mused, tucking a stray strand of hair behind their ear. "I also used to steal from people, you know."
       Their hair fell over their shoulders, to which they quickly raised a hand to the back of their head. The clip—once belonging to Arlecchino—was gone, now settled in their caretaker's open palm.
       "H— huh?!"
       "Admittedly, I haven't done so in quite some time, so what you saw just then was moreso the skills I've learned as a Harbinger than my thievery skills."
       He kindly secured their hair back once again.
       "Ah... I never would have guessed."
       "That is the point." He nodded, going on to tease: "You do very much remind me of the younger version of myself... you have quite the awful amount of attitude, though. I was never so difficult."
       They huffed, patting their face dry with their palms, to which he chuckled.
       "Hmph, I doubt that. I'll bet you were worse than I am."
       "Whatever you say, dearest."
       He was, but he had no plans of telling them that, of course.
vi. enrollment.
       "My orphans seem to like you, [Name]."
       They smiled up at Arlecchino from their place on the ground, one of the much younger children sleeping against their thigh. Their hand absently toyed with the child's hair in a manner that seemed akin to that of a loving older sibling. "I like to think they do. They're lucky, then, because I happen to quite like them, too!"
       The ghost of a smile graced her lips at that.
       "You know," she mused calmly, placing a firm hand on their head. They squeaked slightly at the force behind her display of affection. "You are publicly viewed as the Regrator's child."
       "What?!" they gasped, a mix between shocked and embarrassed. That wasn't necessarily a bad thing, but... "Wait, people are saying that? Actually?"
       "They are," she confirmed, "but I mention this for one very particular reason: do you know how to defend yourself, [Name]?"
       "Somewhat, but not entirely," they admitted. "I learned a lot in my time... um, wandering, shall we call it..? Anyway. I can defend myself, but not really well. Not at all well enough for the place I've found myself in, I think."
       She nodded in understanding at that.
       "Have you considered enrolling in the House of Hearth?"
       "I've thought about it. Would I even qualify, though..? I'm technically not an orphan..."
       "No, but consider it a favor from me. You would get an education of equal rigor to Snezhnayan private schools, as well as learning how to protect yourself."
       "...You would do that for me, Arle?"
       Her cheeks tinted red at that, and she groaned, lightly pushing them away by the head. They giggled at her annoyance.
       "Don't call me that"—she coughed into her fist, trying her best to mask the good-natured embarrassment such a nickname caused her—"but... I would. You need to learn how to handle yourself."
       She then got on one knee, meeting their gaze with intensity that made them a bit nervous. Both her hands sat firmly on their shoulders.
       "What you need to understand, however, is that you will automatically be drafted into the Fatui at your graduation. I do not believe that the Regrator would let you out of his sight at your young age, so you needn't worry about being separated from him, but... you will be exposed to wicked things."
       "...But I need to do this for my safety, right?"
       "You don't 'need' to do anything," she clarified. "I would advise it, though. You are an annoying little brat, but I—as well as the Ninth—would loathe to see anything happen to you."
       "Well... I don't mind enrolling."
       "Oh?"
       "I really don't mind," they repeated, offering her a pensive smile. "I've already seen pretty rough things, and, I mean... I know what you all do for a living. I'm not oblivious, Arlecchino. Any kid born and raised in Snezhnaya would know."
       "I didn't think so," she assured. "No, I never once believed you to be oblivious... that much, I agree with. Childhood innocence does not thrive in this nation."
       "You're right. It doesn't."
       A comfortable silence settled for a moment. Arlecchino's battle-hardened hands were a calming force upon their shoulders.
       "...Soo, how exactly are we planning on convincing Pantalone to let this happen?"
       "Ah." She went quiet. "...That is the question."
please consider reblogging, it helps me out quite a lot! taglist: @m1shapanda, @kaichuuu, @zeldadou, @aroacenezha (aka the beloved moot who inspired this fic. say "thank you maji" everyone 🫶🫶🫶🫶 /hj /lh)
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muzansfangs · 9 months
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If you were their soulmate.
Starring: Aizen Sosuke x f!reader; Mayuri Kurotsuchi x f!reader; Uryuu Ishida x f!reader.
Format: head canons
Warnings: fluff, basically. Also, be aware that Uryuu is aged up and that Aizen’s part has some toxic traits. He is a walking red flag, after all.
Plot: how would they act if you were their soulmate and they were genuinely in love with you? Was it love at first sight, or were you two just friends at first?
Requested by: @stygianoir I’m sorry if it took me a while! I hope you liked it!
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Uryuu Ishida.
• For someone as logical and rational as him, it was impossible to believe it was love at first sight. Could something like that possibly exist? He did not trust his own feelings around you. You were a good person, he felt comfortable around you. Yet, the way you always seemed to understand him and support every decision he made was quite disturbing. It was impossible to be that connected to someone. It almost felt like a spiritual connection.
• He probably did not have any filter around you and was not afraid to show you his true colors. He was fine with not being judged as soemone too analytical and detached, for once. He liked the way you made him feel normal.
• He did not let anyone hurt you, or offend you in any way. It did not matter if it was during a fight, or in a more casual occasion. He even snapped at Ichigo out of the blue because he had accidentally spilt some coffee on your papers. You found it odd, of course, but it was sweet at some extent.
• He never failed to notice how beautiful you were. He always thought your appearence whetted his appetites, but he restrained himself from crossing the line of friendship for months. Why? He was frightened by the idea of losing you. What if you didn’t want him back? You two were definitely better off as friends. Or so he thought until something happened.
• Something happened, right. That was Ichigo trying to hit on you. He could not let that happen. Now he was absolutely sure that he could be a better boyfriend material than him, therefore he quickly made up his mind and decided to talk to you. Man on a mission: he interrupted Ichigo’s little speech and literally dragged you away from him.
• He thought it would have been easier for someone like him, so logical and precise. He was so wrong. As you two were alone and he could finally confess his feelings to you, he felt his heart sink into his chest. Oh, damn, your eyes. It was all your cute eyes’s fault. He got distracted! Naturally, he messed up his little mental plan on how to make you understand he liked you. Yet, it was cute.
• “Your eyes are so pretty. They leave me speechless” he simply blurted out, clenching his fists down his sides.
• A long silence followed that as you both blushed and you blinked at him in confusion. Uryuu panicked, of course, and the tips of his ears turned red. He knew words were not his forte at this point and he thought about kissing you instead.
• Yet, you surprised him when you said “I love you too, if that’s what you meant. Your eyes not quite bad too, by the way” you whispered, smiling softly.
• Uryuu smiled weakly and hugged you tightly. Yes, there was no doubt about it. You were definitely his soulmate. But his brain had short-circuited again and you had to clear your throat to remind him that he should have kissed you and not hugged you.
Aizen Sosuke.
• It was love at first sight. Or obsession, at first sight. He believed in that concept, but he never thought it would have ever happened to him. He was too self-centered, affected by his god complex and detached from any human emotion to feel a connection with someone. You were more than his obsession, at first. He was curious about you and how you simply seemed to break his walls and go with his flow without getting cut on his edges.
• As you two spent time together, he started to do some researches about the nature of some spiritual bonds among individuals and he found out that you two were most likely soulmates. What a shock. Aizen knew one thing for sure: if you were his soulmate, he had to have you by his side no matter what.
• ‘No matter what’ was a devious concept for him. Why? He did not care about what was the price to pay to win to you over, he would have done it. Or kidnapped you.
• As he watched you stroll around and talking with Shinji, he definitely uttered something among the lines of “Mine of no one else’s”. That night he trimmed his former Captain’s hair. Not long before that, Shinji became one of Aizen’s victims.
• As you seemed to be naturally drawn to him, though, he simply welcomed you into his life. He loved showing you a little soft side of him no one knew. You spent a lot of time sipping on tea and talking about calligraphy. You were so perfect for him. And he definitely loved it when you got too tired and fell asleep over his shoulder.
• Your natural predisposition for meddling into his business and figuring out his plans made him go crazy and he was soon forced to have a serious talk in the middle of the woods with you. You had stand by his side. If you were soulmates, you would have probably agreed in whatever wicked plans he had. Right?
• “Is this the part where you give me the choice to either follow you, or die right here? Of course I am in” you said, as he confronted you. Oh, the wolfish grin plastered over his face at that point was priceless.
• You were not as cruel as he was. You simply stack by his side and followed his orders, but he tried to keep your hands as clean as possible. After all, a beauty as yourself could not become too blood-thirsty. He did not want you to become as Gin, he was happy with having you glued by his hip.
• His confession was smooth. Right before he tricked Hinamori, he invited you to watch the fireworks together. After all, everybody did it and it would have been simply suspicious not to attend the mundane event. However, as you were sitting on the rooftop next to him, eyes twinkling for the technicolor lights exploding in the night sky, he grasped your jaw rather roughly and kissed you passionately.
• “Did I make it loud and clear?” he simply purred in your ear. Of course not. It was more than enough.
Mayuri Kurotsuchi.
• You caught the eye of this man. He probably wanted to experiment on you at first! Yet, as he studied your features better, he had to admit that you were too pretty for that and… What was that strange attraction he felt towards you? He wanted to know you, to be around you, to study you and not on you. The first thing he did after your first meeting was searching for answers and he got thunderstruck when he found them. He had a soulmate? That was absurd. It was weird thinking that you would have been able to understand him wholly and bear him at his worst.
• Ladies and gentlemen, he tried to be polite. The next day he tracked you down and apologized for his behavior. He told you he did not want to use you as a cavy anymore but that it would have been nice of you to help him understand if soulmates existed. That was his attempt to befriend you and it worked. He did not tell you he suspected you to he his soulmate at first. He did not want to scare you away.
• You two spent most of the time in his laboratory, helping him with his researches or, watching him do them, because he lost his patience over everything. But, eventually, you snapped. You tamed that maniac man by literally yelling at his face to calm down.
• He got offended at first.
• That little voice inside him told him to forgive you right away, though. How frustrating it was!
• After struggling to find a solution to a chemistry problem and you casually walked by dropping the solution, he was left speechless. He spent three alone, in the privacy of his room, to talk to himself about how could someone beat him at his own game.
• Months went by just like that, until you decided to sneak into his private room and rummage through his stuff. Finally, you found a file with your name over it and you were quite shocked to read that you were his soulmate. You planned to make your move on him, since he seemed to be too stubborn to confront you about it. However luck was not in your favor.
• He caught you with the papers in your hands and he fumed in anger.
• You were not even surprised by the argument that followed. It had become amusing at this point. But you knew how to turn the tables in your favor. As he yelled at you, you walked up to him slowly until just mere inches devided your faces.
• “How could you do that? You little—” he ranted, throwing his hands in the air as you simply captured his lips in yours with a kiss. Man, he stopped screaming and turned red from head to toe.
• “Oh. That was so much overdued, actually” he commented, rubbing his chin before kissing you again.
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tsukimefuku · 2 months
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old regrets and guilt ridden pasts (2) ꕥ higuruma hiromi
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part 1 → this part → part 3 (soon) | mdni!
summary: you get home, only to find that hiromi is there ready to talk after your failed attempt to open up about your past. he intends to confront you on that, among other things.
tags: +18!, non-explicit! sex scenes, implied smut, f!reader, established relationship higuruma x reader, little to no cursing, reader is kind of emotionally stunted, romance, mentions of death, grief, angst, fluff, hurt + comfort (a lot of comfort, this is healing).
wc: 1.8k
notes etc.: heavy spoilers for "sand and snow" readers. this might be the loveliest thing i've written to date. thank you so much @redlikerozez for betaing it 🧡 written to the sound of running up that hill (kate bush) and heart skipped a beat (the xx) - the second one is the song that inspired the main scene. as always, i write flawed characters that can (and will) sometimes be assholes, but they're trying their best.
ꕥ collection of stories: "jujutsu partners au" → masterlist for fics listed in chronological order of events
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When you came inside your apartment, there were no lights on. However, from the open door to your bedroom, you could see that Hiromi was laying down on your bed, probably fast asleep by this point.
Defeated, you left your things on the table and silently got in the room, stepping inside the bathroom to wash away all the grime and dirt (and hurt) from a godawful day.
'Godawful day' is definitely a good name for having memories of people long gone stirred up and thrown at your face, reviving your grief all over again.
You were still feeling guilty for not having talked to Hiromi about it, unable to not shut him out, yet again.
Why do I keep doing this? I'm such a jerk.
Upon finishing your shower, you came back into the room, and slid yourself into comfortable clothing before laying down beside him. Hiromi had his back turned to you, but he must've felt you on the bed, because he didn't take long to roll himself on the mattress and look at you.
He seemed upset, and with good reason.
"You could have entrusted me with your pain too, you know," Hiromi began, not giving you much time to muster up anything to say. Not even a good night.
You exhaled slowly, trying to collect your thoughts around it all. This day was an absolute rollercoaster of emotions.
"For you to learn my pain, I’d have to explain it, and I just... It is hard to explain exactly what happened and remembering that day," you offered. "Aside from me, Nanami is the only one who also saw it happen."
Hiromi considered what you said for a moment, but you could see the resolute way in which he softly shook his head.
"Still. I can’t fight you every step of the way for you to let me in. I’m your boyfriend."
The word lingered in the atmosphere around you.
He was, in fact, your boyfriend. You had been dating for a while then.
"We’re supposed to share these kinds of things so that we can be there for each other," he stated, a chide with a plead for understanding, while his thumb came up to press softly against your chin.
"I… I know. I’m sorry."
And you were, truly and deeply sorry, for everything. For pushing him into going along with that stupid idea of letting you inside his domain to get rid of your cursed technique temporarily, for retreating back into yourself when things grew dire, and for not letting him in when he expressly asked you to.
"What are you so afraid of?" Hiromi asked, in earnest.
You took some time to think about his question.
What were you so afraid of, after all, that you couldn't let him in — or at least felt like it, many times? 
Then, you realized.
"I'm scared that… That you will leave me too," you began, "I'm terrified that I will have opened myself up, all vulnerable and shit, and then for some reason, I'm left alone again. That's a recurring theme in my life."
"My love, in case that ever happens, keeping me at arms length won’t make it hurt any less."
You chuckled bitterly.
"Funny you should say that. I said the same thing earlier today."
Hiromi edged himself closer softly under the covers, approaching you gently.
"It takes one to know one, right?" he offered, in a kind and loving voice.
"I guess it does," you answered with a minute smile on your face.
"So, will you let me in now?" he inquired, holding your gaze. "Please."
You knew he'd surely be aware of at least the gist of the story, due to the evidence inside the envelope he never got to open before you confessed to your brother's "murder".
Still, it was different. He had to hear you say it, tell him the whole story.
So, you inhaled deeply, ready to dive in the murky lake of your past, before proceeding.
"My brother. He was…" considering for a moment, there was no word that could really convey it. Not entirely. You settled for "everything."
A sigh.
"He was… The sun to my moon. My brother was the laughter, the joy, the silly jokes, the shoes thrown around the house, the noise, the annoyance, the smell of curry in the kitchen, the helping hand, the coming home to, no matter how dire things got."
Silence.
"And then, in one night, there was… none of him anymore. Nothing, just his cold dead body laying on the ground."
A moment that felt like ten.
"I… We were twins, and a part of me, I guess… just died with him. I don’t think I’ll ever get it back. So here I am, still living with this hole inside me, where some piece used to be. His piece."
Hiromi stayed quiet for a second, pulling your knuckles kindly against his lips.
"My sun is gone, and I'm drifting, untethered. I…" You took a heavy huff of air inside your lungs. Yet, you were still breathless, the ache weighing on your thorax like a hydraulic press.
"This grief is like a tar pit, and no matter what I do, this faceless monster just keeps sucking me under." 
Your last words dropped to the drum of a eulogy, the one you never got to do.
His palm descended lightly on your cheek as the night breeze gently brushed over the window. The room was dark, dimly lit by moonlight and streetlamps bleeding through the curtain, but it became remarkably quiet. Silent.
Cotton filled ears while the world stopped moving for a second, waiting under a muted heartbeat.
One. Two. Three. Four beats.
His gaze softened — rather than darkened — as his lips approached, all pacify, and yearning, and empathy, and commiseration. Upon contact, your eyes fluttered into a deeper dimness, letting your mind drift around, away and back again, as he began his first attempt to tether you.
You may have lost your sun, but you wouldn't keep drifting away, not anymore.
He wouldn't let that happen.
My love…
Yes?
Eyes on me.
One. Two. Three. Four beats.
Okay.
Dexterous hands pulled you back to Earth, drawing you deeper into his orbit when they fit themselves securely and unfaltering against your waist.
Warm digits kneaded over the celestial wanderer drowned in the tar pit of painful remembrance.
Your senses thickened, your pupils grew wider, and your touch found the nape of his neck, seeking the halo of his comfort.
He was always so comfortable.
Just like coming home to.
He felt at home in you, too.
Another kiss. Gentler. Kinder.
The dark against your fluttered-shut eyelids didn't steal you away from him again, though. He had placed himself firmly around you, with an inevitable gravitational pull, all understanding, warm and welcoming, with the soft press of his entire body against yours.
Your senses heightened — you smelled him, touched him, heard him, felt him. The rhythm of his breath, now softly hitched. His chest, up and down, pulsing with longing. His skin, silvery glow under the moonlight. 
Hiromi smelled…
Well, he smelled like Hiromi.
The best smell there was.
Earthly bound, finally.
His mouth, teeth, lips, all made their way to slit themselves against the edge of your jaw.
May I?
Please.
One, two, three, four beats.
A sharp exhale leaves your lips as his teeth sink against the softness of your chin, crawling up to your mouth, hot breaths mixing with one another, two stardust clouds melting together.
He bit your bottom lip and let it go, then brushed his own mouth against yours. So feathery. So delicate.
Another kiss.
You lock against each other with little to no exploration — you've walked these paths before. You do so with the soft embrace of familiarity. The velvety reassurance of known lovers.
All to the gravitational beat that surrounded you both.
You grasped each other's hands against your clothes, and gentle as could be, the fabric slowly unraveled itself from your bodies, sliding their delicate way down the floor, forgotten.
Hiromi began nosing his way down your skin, but your hands cupped his jaw, pulling him back.
A pause.
Four heartbeats.
Eyes on me, remember?
A huff, almost a laugh, and the kindest peck.
Okay, my love.
His hand made its way under the duvet, all electric, and liquid, and cold, and hot, pressing the air out of your lungs. He was happy to inhale you in, open-mouthed and muddy, as you hitched and whimpered to his rhythm.
You were quick to fall apart, undoing to him, arching your entire body. Almost losing yourself.
But he pulled you back, the other hand resting over your shoulder blades, remembering you.
Eyes on me.
As you tried descending yourself, he held you back. 
This time, it would be all about you.
Gently pulling you under, his thumbs brushed against your shoulders with tenderness. His eyes flickered with trepidation and affection, as your foreheads pressed to one another. Hiromi pushed and sunk slowly into you, hooked nose snuggled beside yours.
To say he was making love to you wouldn’t be wrong, but paled in comparison to this.
He was loving you tenderly, honestly, just so you could take some of that love he poured into you and give it to yourself, filling the gaping hole left behind by an abrupt absence. The forever and always empty seat in the front row of your life.
He pleaded internally, please, may this be enough.
He was loving you so wholeheartedly, giving you all the warmth you offered to most people but yourself, that you could’ve wept — you probably did, the dampening on his cheek brushing against yours made that evident.
"Touch me." Love me.
"Yes." I do. I will.
Hiromi tried, kind and gentle, loving this grief into vanishing, willing it into non-existence. 
My love. My whole, entire love.
But he couldn't, it was engraved in black all over your flesh, your bones, and your soul.
Each kiss while he wrapped his arms around you, tucking you underneath him, was an attempt at chipping away on your armor of pain and loss.
As he rocked your hips gently, he imprinted on your skin every inch of affection you needed to soothe yourself, but you were finding it difficult to pick up these pieces and ensemble the puzzle.
You found it hard to let all your guilt go, after all. It was already an old companion of sorts.
Drinking your voice in as you tipped over the fall, he thought for a moment, could I steal her pain away?
He'd do it in a single heartbeat if he could, if only to repay you for saving him after he had gone past the point of no return.
Some days after that, coming back to this moment, you would finally understand other people's shortcomings from a deeply personal and subjective perspective.
It was hard, after all, being forgiven without forgiving yourself.
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Tag list (that I keep forgetting, sorry): @yammy-yammy-yama @g-kleran @otomesass
Reblog divider by @benkeibear
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sovasleepy · 2 months
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hot and cold
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[gekko x gn!reader] - you're an agent with such a seemingly cold exterior - both physical and metaphorical - but being gekko’s saving grace might change some minds about you.
warnings: the agents kinda make assumptions about the reader, a little hurt/comfort if you squint real hard. brief mentions of injuries, unconsciousness, very minor swearing
notes: tbh a “reyna being a motherly figure to gekko” vibe popped out a little too hard but i digress. requested by anon, i hope you enjoy!
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kingdom's agents were well trained.
from the freezing temperatures of russia, to the most humid days on bermudian islands, the agents were resilient to all types of weather. today wasn't supposed to be particularly challenging in that aspect. a routine mission in some section of los angeles didn't sound particularly hot.
in fact, it had been the least of your worries about two hours ago.
you respected all of the agents on the protocol, especially considering the facts that not only were you newest addition, but some of the agents on this particular trip were among the first.
reyna, omen, cypher, and gekko stood next to you as the jet approached the site you were landing at. it felt almost childish to you that you were more nervous to be around your own coworkers than you were thinking about the fact that you could be lying dead any minute now.
they hadn’t ever directly been mean to you.
omen, bless him, was never any good at showing too much concern so you didn’t mind the cold shoulder you often felt from him.
cypher had his own secretive issues, and so did reyna.
that said, you never quite found your place amongst the agents. granted, you hadn’t been here too long, but the creeping and perpetual sense of being unwanted bothered you. to add to this, your abilities directly harmed the abilities of other agents. thus, your training sessions were always against your coworkers, which didn't always seem to sit well.
speaking technically, your ability did revolve around the manipulation of heat just like phoenix's did... only, you controlled the absence of it. the reaction of his abilities made fire, and yours made ice. this meant that you and phoenix either paired a little too well.
or not at all, depending on how one wants to look at it.
and then there were the other agents. kay/o's body produced a little heat, but ultimately couldn't produce enough to shake the ice. the same for killjoy's bots, cypher's tech, chamber's utility, sova's bow, even harbor's water.
and so you began keeping to yourself.
except for on missions, when communication was key. only your communications were down, and had been for some time.
the only people you could find were dead. slouched, bloodied bodies against buildings or in doorways seemed to mock you. luckily, none of them had been the faces of those on the mission with you.
that was until you heard a weak warbling. you called back to whatever created had made the noise, and was met with another weaker sound. still, you followed the creatures direction. after a few moments of sifting through debris, you were met with the dusty and bloody face of gekko.
dizzy sat curled up in his lap. his arm was limp, but bent as if he had been holding her close. for a brief moment, you thought he was dead. however, his chest rose and fell and slow, scarily shallow breaths. he was alive at least. the next thing on your agenda was to find the source of his unconsciousness, and hopefully stop it.
you knelt down to his level. he was slouched against the wall, head lolled to his left. there were splotches of dried blood on him, just the occasional mark on his clothing or his skin, but it didn't appear to be his.
his outer thigh had a darker patch of blood, thicker and definitely coming from him. however, the wound didn’t seem like it would be severe enough to have led to his current state. something else was wrong.
you continued to inspect him. his skin was pale, but cold and sweaty. this had to be the cause, right? but there was something deeper than that, those were simply more symptoms. you looked around and observed where gekko was. the trail in the dirt around him wasn’t footsteps, but was instead the markings of gekko half-dragging himself to where he was sat.
but yet he wasn’t in any danger at the time. the only pair of footsteps that had been close to him belonged to an already-dead enemy. so he dragged himself there for what? the shade that surrounding buildings and debris provided?
of course.
your alignment with the cold also gave you the benefit of not feeling the heat so harshly. it was the middle of a californian summer afternoon, of course it was hot.
heat exhaustion. that’s what was wrong with him.
you allowed yourself to feel the cool of chilled air surround your arms. you passed a hand over dizzy and wingman, who made weak noises of thanks. as much as you would like to help them, gekko needed you more right now.
you sat down beside him and pulled him onto your lap, his head on your stomach and him situated half on and half between your legs. you didn't want to turn him too cold too quickly, worried that the rapid change might cause him more harm. to the best of your ability, you slowly chilled your own body and the air around you.
one hand was placed on his forehead and the other arm hung over chest in an attempt to disperse the cool. dizzy, apparently feeling better, wormed her way up under his feet. elevating his legs was supposed to help too, right? maybe she knew that.
faintly, you heard a noise come from gekko’s earpiece.
“mateo? answer me, mateo. are you okay?”
the voice belonged to reyna. you hadn’t enteracted with her as much as you would’ve liked, but you respected her nonetheless.
you took your hand away from his forehead. after unbinding your own broken earpiece and tossing it, you leaned down to get closer to his. pressing the small button on the side, you spoke into it.
“hello? this is y/n. gekko is with me. i think he’s going to be fine, but he’s unconscious, and i really don’t know what i’m doing.”
“y/n?” the voice belonged to cypher this time. “how about you? are you alright? your communications and vital signs went down. we thought we lost you.”
“i’m… okay, i think? a few bumps and bruises, but nothing too bad apart from the earpiece i’ll be paying for.”
“good.” reyna spoke again. “omen is here, too. we have mateo’s location and we’re on our way. a medic is with us. just keep him alive until then.”
“got it.”
rushed as it may be, the concern they showed you warmed your heart. but everything felt like it was going to be okay. help was on its way, everyone was alive, and the mission was successful.
“just me and you guys,” you spoke, looking down at wingman and dizzy, who looked equally worried.
true to their word, the jet landed close to you roughly three minutes later. reyna was the first one to step foot off the aircraft, and the next thirty minutes went by in a blur. when your brain finally settled from its adrenaline high, you plopped down in a chair next to gekko’s bed in the makeshift-infirmary of the jet. reyna stood at the end of the bed. her arms were crossed and she wore her usual stern and hard-to-read face.
“the doctor said he was be alright, y’know.” she spoke after what felt like twenty minutes of comfortable silence.
you looked up from where you had been spaced out, staring at gekko. wingman was on the floor at your feet and you were absently letting him play with your fingers. however, he stopped to look up at reyna too.
“i hope so. i was… scared. honestly, i was beginning to think you guys would have left me. not that i would blame you. everything was down, you had every right to assume i was dead.”
“never.” she spoke. there was a chilling certainty in her voice. “you are an asset.”
“i suppose.” you paused for a beat, debating whether or not to finish your sentence. “i adore you guys. all of you. i think i just have a hard time finding my value to you all.”
you were met with silence. it festered, feeding the anxiety already unfurling within your chest. finally, reyna spoke again.
“admittedly, it’s hard to join the protocol and feel like you fit in. mateo felt the same way when he first joined, too, but the feeling goes away eventually. he wanted to speak to you, y’know?”
“he did?”
“all the time. he has this… fantastical way about him when he speaks about you. like he has all these… emotions or something built up, and instead of talking to you he’s trying to fit them all into two sentences while i’m still drinking my damn coffee.”
you couldn’t help but smile. you were always so nervous to talk to him, yet you never took the time to consider the fact that maybe he was nervous to talk to you too.
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vinillain · 14 days
Text
Great wave spoilers//
WHATTATTATATATT
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THE TONE SHIFT WAS CRAZYYYY
I love these two and the newly weds paralleling each other. Maybe I’m reaching but they literally look like genderbend Amalia and Yugo (THE SAME PONYTAIL??) I also feel absolutely awful for them because considering the high tensions and that they are the first official now married Elia-Sadida couple besides their king and queen they have a TON of pressure on them that rides on their relationship.
(I saw a hc that they met on the battle field which is soooo cute… the war is tearing both sides apart but it brought them together 🥺)
I feel so bad though, this poor Eliatrope who’s lost her parents in a war, been stuck in a timeless dimension for 10k+ years- gets out to be apart of this elite squad and then loses her family AGAIN+ all the younger siblings she spent so much time with. Falls in love and gets to be happy but has to represent her people and the ties, I imagine she has a lot of weight on her shoulders. (side eyes Yugo)
And on top of that she watches her king who she and the few of her people that are left rely on get poisoned, likely by the very same people she has to live among every day. Next to her husband 😭😭😭 I LOVE that last shot with them at the other end of the table paralleling Amalia and Yugo. I feel soooooo bad for her. Just when things were going smoothly too :(
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Also this is weird but I genuinely like Aurora?? She’s a total b*tch but her crazy jumps in logic and genuine narcissism and insanity infatuate me. While I’m sure she might have some sympathetic traits she works a lot better as an antagonist when you aren’t trying to look for a sympathetic villain. She looked at this wedding and immediately made it about herself. “Armand wouldn’t have” BABE… Armand might not have but he would not be acting the way you are 😭😭Honestly I like this direction?? Maybe that’s just me but it’s fun to see her character get explored and not just be… there. Sitting next to her husband forever and not being allowed to speak.
I actively want to see her downfall but I hope it’s really fun. She’s so self centered but it works so well. A but like Azula from avatar, I feel like she’s going to grow worse over time and do crazier and crazier things until she’s completely lost it. And I am so here for it.
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It seems like the pregnancy is genuine. There’s always a possibility she’s lying or there’s another factor we won’t see until later. But until now it does seem somewhat real. And I don’t think they (or at least Aurora) had a hand in poisoning Yugo. Since Osa says “Let them enjoy this last party.” But that could also have been a last as in “I’m going to kill them-take them out” it’s been said but it’s likely Amalia will accuse Aurora since she’s the “outsider” and the most suspicious at the moment. And Aur might be hurt by this since she lost her husband too. Etc.
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“Wow maybe royal duties aren’t always so b-“ and then he immediately throws up blood.
Poor Yu 😭😭 I’m wondering if Amalia’s drink was poisoned too. She didn’t sniff it or anything, maybe she just got the feeling something was wrong? (Sheram Sham intuition) I feel soooo awful for her. I honestly can’t blame her for immedietly freaking out, she’s lost so much. All of her family is gone and after a long stressful day with Yugo’s nightmare, the arguments, Aurora showing up and having to manage an entire very important wedding with high tensions, seeing the love of her life and really her only family get sick with a possibility of death right before her eyes is terrifying.
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These two really can’t catch a break (and this all happened in ONE day)
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Anyway considering how slow the last few chapters have been the build off is definitely paying off. On the edge of my seat for next week (hoping for some Yumalia comfort :,)
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Wip for a piece “to Poison a god” ;)
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books-and-catears · 5 months
Text
9 days of Solomon: Humanity
TW: Angst, death and slight self harm mention, Hurt/Comfort
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"The Human Exchange students who have stolen many Devildom hearts" - the title of the magazine on Solomon's table. He stared lovingly, at the front page where you both posed for a picture, smiling at each other, your arms linked.
Your humanity - that was the one thing that he had sole knowledge of. He walked over to the window, watching you bid goodbye to the brothers who had come to visit Coccytus Hall.
He watches your tense shoulders relax, letting out a sigh of relief, the moment they were out of sight. The smile plastered on your face faltered as you walked into the house.
No more pretense. Now that it was only you and him again. He waited for you in the living room, opening his arms for you. You crashed into him without hesitation, breathing deeply.
"That must have been tiring?" He whispered, stroking your hair.
"Very much." You mumbled.
"Lets have an early dinner and head to bed."
"Solomon...can I sleep with you tonight again?"
"You know my answer will always be yes, MC."
It was going to be one of those nights again. You trembling and sobbing quietly, squeezing his hand with both of yours - after you thought he had fallen asleep.
He remembered the first time you did this, the sinking feeling in his chest, the searing rage in tightened fists, the devastation of seeing his bright and adorable apprentice in such pain.
You were definitely drunk from the human world cocktails you had downed in the bar. Else you would have never opened up.
"Solomon, I wish I could give you my pacts. I don't want them...I don't want anything to do with them... you're so lucky you got to live with the angels...Why couldn't Diavolo send me to Purgatory hall with you...I would have been so happy...I'm so tired of pretending it doesn't hurt..."
You were not happy at HOL with the brothers. That was the first truth bomb of many.
"I cannot stop having nightmares... I'm just a little human stuck among thousand year old celestials and demons...why am I here...I'm just a normal human... I'm *hic*...I'm so small...so insignificant...I just wanted a normal life...why am I here...why...can't I go back to normal..."
Solomon swallowed the growing lump in his throat. The way you smiled so brightly through everything, he forgot what an immense burden this would be for a normal human, how overwhelming all of this must have been for you.
"Noone here actually wants me... they're being nice to me for her...for Lilith...she's been gone for so long...and yet she is so loved...she's so lucky to be so loved...I wish..I really wish I could have that too..."
I do, MC. I love you. I love you for just you. He wanted to hold you tight and keep telling this to you. But he couldn't say it, not until you had let everything out.
"You know when I was dying...all I wanted to say a few goodbyes...I wanted to hug some people I loved...wanted to make some apologies...wanted to say a few thank yous... especially to you...But he didn't let me...he didn't let me...he made it so long and painful...why couldn't he have atleast made it quick...I wouldn't have fought to live if he just told me..."
Guilt pounded at his aching heart. He should have been there. He should have saved you.
"I'm so tired of the lies...Solomon, promise me if you run out of kindness for me one day...if you no longer want me around...please just tell me...I won't mind at all...I will do away with myself peacefully...I will cut off the pacts off my skin and give them to you if you'd like... please don't hurt me like he did...please, I just need one person to hold... without feeling afraid...please be on my side..."
Tears gathered at the corners of Solomon's eyes. When was the last time something has brought him to tears like this? He squeezed the hand you had placed in his.
You cried into his chest again tonight, silently this time. He already knew everything after all. But this time he held you tight, cooing reassurance in your ear, pressing urgent kisses on your head.
"You mean the world to me, MC. I will never hurt you. I don't need anything else...I just want you to be okay. I only want to protect you."
Your sobs were gentle now, softer, as you nuzzled deeper into his loving embrace. "Thank you...Thank you, Solomon."
"I love you, MC." The last thing he whispers just as you fall asleep, barely catching it.
You already knew more about him than anyone else. Noone quite fussed over his health and well-being as much as you. His immortality never made him less human to you. And for that he was eternally grateful.
Though the most of the humanity he vowed to protect didn't accept him - if it included you, he would happily die trying to protect it.
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photogirl894 · 2 months
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Hey bestie! Congrats on 1300!!!!❤️❤️❤️
You deserve every single one of those followers and more!
Could you do the fluff prompt "Let me help you" with Hunter? Maybe the reader is really stressed/burnt out and Hunter just wants to take care of her. (If you wanna do it with a little hurt/comfort flair I definitely wouldn't mind 😂)
Thanks so much!
Thank you so much, my dear!! 💜 I'm happy to count you among my followers and friends!! 🥰
I got uh...slightly carried away with this one towards the end, I'll admit 😅 You'll see what I mean lol
"Emotional Engineering"
34. "Let me help you."
Pairing: Hunter x fem reader
***
Becoming an engineer was something you'd wanted since you were a teenager and you were asked in school the kind of career you wanted to pursue. You were smart and really good with ship parts, putting them together and fixing them and such. You thought becoming an engineer would be no problem.
Until you got to engineering school at the Republic Academy.
That was not easy by any means.
You were lucky to get an internship as an engineer working in the Republic shipyards that helped with some things during your schooling, but it still kept you busy and only added a bit more stress.
Then you were assigned to a squad during the war as part of your internship: Clone Force 99.
They were a fun group that you got along well with and they were supportive of your schooling, offering to help however they could. You were glad you got assigned to them...but it didn't help that you found yourself distracted by their leader, Sergeant Hunter.
You were so attracted to him in so many ways, it was almost ridiculous. Your thoughts wandered to him when you were supposed to be studying for exams and you couldn't focus. You imagined what it would be like if he held you...kissed you...roamed his hands and lips over your body....
"Stop that!" you'd say out loud to yourself before smacking your own face to break out of your daydream. You couldn't afford to think like that. One, because you were supposed to be studying and two, he was a soldier and technically, your commanding officer. There was no way he'd be interested in anything like that.
Those distractions paired with the stress of your schooling as well as your work was doing nothing for your physical and mental health.
You found yourself feeling burnt out eventually, pushing yourself to do more when you felt you couldn't go any further. You had to. You couldn't let yourself or your squad down, even if it was costing you sleep and time.
This was something Hunter soon noticed.
Concerned for you, he went to your apartment one day to check on you. When he got there, he saw your door was left unlocked, which was already a sign something was up. He walked inside and announced his presence, seeing you with your head down at your desk.
His voice woke you and you cried out, "Hydrospanner!" Then you groaned, realizing you'd fallen asleep again. This couldn't keep happening. You jumped when you heard Hunter say your name. "Hunter! What...how did you get in here?"
"You left your door unlocked," he told you. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah, I'm fine," you said, even though your whole body felt heavy and exhausted. "I'm just trying to study for my final test."
"It looked like you were sleeping instead of studying," he remarked.
You shook your head. "No, really, I'm fine."
He walked up beside you and you had to look away. You were slightly freaking out that you two were alone in your apartment. Then he said, "You're not. You've been pushing yourself and not getting sleep. Don't think I haven't noticed. You should take a break."
"I can't. This test is too important. Once I take this test, I'll officially be an engineer."
"Then maybe I can help you study and keep you focused."
An involuntary squeak sounded from your throat at the proposition. You would be far from focused if he were there. "That won't be necessary, thanks," you replied quickly.
"Your heart rate just spiked," he pointed out. "Are you uncomfortable with me here?"
You whipped around in your chair to look up at him and blurted out, "No, no, it's not that! It's just...well, I...I wouldn't be able to focus at all if you were helping me."
He narrowed his eyes and tilted his head curiously. "Why is that?"
You could feel your face turning red and heating up. Guess there was no way out now. "It's because...I'm really attracted to you and part of why I'm struggling is because I'm constantly distracted thinking about you."
His eyebrows rose up in surprise for a moment at your confession. Then he asked you, "What sort of things about me do you think about?"
Your throat closed up and you convulsed slightly in embarrassment as you turned away, not wanting to share the thoughts you'd had about him. What would he even begin to think if he knew?
However, Hunter had been able to sense the rushing of your heartbeat and that gave away everything...which made him smirk with satisfaction.
He knelt down next to you and laid a hand on your shoulder. "Look, sweetheart, you either need a break or you need to keep studying. Either way, I want to be here for you." He reached up with his other hand and gently guided your face so he could look into your eyes. "Let me help you."
The sincerity and care in his voice finally made something break inside you and, before you realized what you were doing, you leaned down and crushed your lips against his, catching him slightly off guard. Just as you were about to pull away, his hand cradled the back of your head and held you in place as he eagerly kissed you in return, which shocked you, but in a good way. Then his hands slid down your body to your thighs, he gripped them and pulled you forward a little, wrapping your legs around his surprisingly thin waist. Once he knew you were secure, one arm wrapped around you and the other came under your leg as he lifted you off the chair and into the air.
Breaking the kiss, he breathed out, his eyes dark with desire, "I'm deciding for you: you're taking a break with me. And that's an order."
Still catching your breath from his amazing kiss, you simply replied, "Yes, sir."
He carried you over to your couch and laid you down on your back. As he climbed over you, he said in a husky voice, "I can help bring all of your fantasies about me to life. I'd love to know the things you think about or imagine about me."
Your whole body went hot at his remarks and you found yourself unable to respond, unable to believe this was really happening.
Brushing some stray hair from your face, he added, "Maybe then, you'll be less distracted and can focus on your test."
"I...think that'll only distract me more," you replied.
He grinned mischievously. "Only one way to find out." Then his mouth found yours once more and his arms pulled you into him, his passion overtaking both him and you.
Needless to say...you ended up passing your final engineering test with flying colors.
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