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aliceramblez · 3 months

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Dating the Hazbin Hotel Residents 😈

Tags: GN!Reader, Fluff, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Mentioned Mature Topics (ie. Suicidal Thoughts, Alcohol Abuse, SA, etc), Spoilers For The Show, etc.

A/N: Ahhh yes, more brainriot for the pile 😌 I was more of a Helluva gal before the show aired, but now I gotta say these blorbos are a dear part of my heart! Hopefully y'all enjoy these as much as I did writing them!

Consider following my main blog @taruchinator for more solid content & feel free to leave a request here for future HCs~

Charlie 🌈

When the Happy Hotel first opened its doors and all of Hell started making a mockery of it, you were probably the only one who took it as a sign to try and improve from the low life that you were. It's not like you had anything else to live for, anyway.

As soon as you enter the building, you're immediately greeted by the bubbly Princess of Hell herself (along with a reluctant Angel Dust) who is more than happy to show you around and welcomes you with open arms.

You've never been shown this much kindness and sympathy for your situation before, so it naturally takes you aback and makes you wonder what the catch is. Turns out there's none and the Princess is probably the only sweet soul to live in this shithole.

As you grow closer, she asks you to drop the title and just call her Charlie. She also shares a bit about her situation and how her mother wanted to save sinners from the extermination each year, and now Charlie felt like it was her duty to continue this legacy until her dreams came true.

You can't help but feel touched over how much she cares, so you silently vow to yourself to help her in any way you can, just like she's done for you.

It doesn't take long before the two of you grow even closer and feelings begin to blossom, but you decide to ignore them since why would a Princess ever like someone like you?

But Charlie proves you wrong yet again, since one day she comes to you a blushing mess and confesses her own feelings, asking if you'd like to go out with her. You can't help but vocalize your shock since she could do so much better than a random sinner. She deserved better, too.

She looks at you with fondness in her eyes. “You've been by my side for so long and supported me every step of the way. Who wouldn't fall for someone like that?”

And thus, you are the luckiest person in Hell because you scored Charlotte Morningstar, and whoever says otherwise can get a knife to their throat.

She's the perfect definition of a sweet and patient girlfriend, never pushing you to do anything you aren't comfortable with (since you really aren't used to such adoration in a romantic relationship), but as soon as you give her the get-go, she'll be sure to shower you with as much affection as she can until the doubts in your mind disappear completely.

You aren't that far behind either. Albeit not as good as her, you do your best to be a comforting partner whenever she needs you. This is especially necessary after an extermination happens, which always leaves Charlie devastated and in need of a hug or words of encouragement because she doubts herself sometimes and wonders if the hotel is even working at all.

You remind her how it brought the two of you together, to which she smiles and agrees that at least something good has come out of it so far.

Vaggie 🎀

Both you and Vaggie used to work in the same legion under Adam with the rest of his exorcists. You knew of each other's existence, but didn't really talk much aside from whatever was needed in the midst of battle.

The day she spares a demon child's life, you're doing your rounds nearby and witness the whole exchange, including Lute coming over and ripping both an eye and Vaggie's wings for showing mercy. You don't know why, but it makes your blood boil.

“HEY! What are you doing?! It was just a kid, why not let it slide?”

And just like that, you become a target of Lute's rage as well, being ripped from your angelic status along with receiving a few nasty cuts, yet surprisingly not as bad as Vaggie herself.

Once the two of you are left to die, you immediately try to tend the girl's wounds with whatever you can. Vaggie can only stare in disbelief at what you'd done and questions why you even did so in the first place—now you were stuck just like she was.

“Guess I just don't like seeing injustice... Who knew Heaven could be so fuckin' shitty?”

You both laugh at the irony of it all, and that's when luck is finally on your side as Charlie finds you in the dirty alley and brings you back to the hotel to heal properly.

For the next three years you two stay at the Hazbin Hotel, helping Charlie in any way you can to try and make her dream a reality since deep down you hope that despite Heaven's corrupt system, there can be a small chance that souls can be redeemed. You hide the fact that you're ex-Anges though, since you don't wanna cause unnecessary drama.

During this time period, the two of you become better friends, having your own inside jokes regarding things you didn't particularly enjoy from your time as Angels, as well as learning more about one another.

You're the one to come to terms with your feelings first and decide to lay them on the table for Vaggie to see—she's always been a straight-to-the-point kind of gal, so if you're about to be rejected, might as well have it be done quick. But of course, she replies with her own declaration and desire to give a relationship a shot, which you're ecstatic about!

It's a bit hard at first since you never got to see much of romantic relationships in Heaven while training for murder every year, but you try and make it work. Both you and Vaggie work endlessly to try and make the other happy, and it only makes you fall for each other even more.

Also Charlie is your go-to wingwoman who will be there to give you the best advice to try and woo your girlfriend. She ships you two so hard.

Angel Dust 🕸

Working at a porn studio under an Overlord who owns your soul can be exhausting. You know this better than anyone since everyone who works under Valentino has contracts that won't let you get far with a leash. This is especially true with your friend Angel Dust.

You know about the things Valentino does to the spider demon—hell, everyone in the studio probably knows, but know better than to say anything about it. You're always there for Angel after particularly rough shoots, doing your best to comfort him in any way you can, though there isn't much you can do given you're in the same spot.

When he tells you he's moving to Princess Charlie's Hazbin Hotel, you're so happy for him! At least that will give him some distance from Valentino and his disgustingly filthy hands when he's not working.

This unsurprisingly doesn't bode well with the Overlord, causing him to throw fits of rage around the studio when Angel leaves for the day. You can't help but make a snarky comment that you definitely regret moments later.

“Can one blame him for wanting space from such an overbearing asshole?”

Without his favorite stress toy around, you end up paying the price for such comments. The kind of pain and suffering he puts you through is completely different from what you're used to. Is this the stuff he does to Angel? He leaves you naked, bruised and bloody in your room, and all you can do is muster what little strenght you have left to head for the Hazbin Hotel.

As soon as the door opens, you immediately tumble forward and start losing consciousness. The last thing you remember is Angel's horrified expression before it all fades to black.

Once you wake up and have been patched up, you explain what happened at the studio, and you could've sworn you saw fire in Angel's eyes as he holds on to you, fearing you might disappear at any moment. He begs you to stay in the hotel with him, and you agree without hesitation.

And so, your new routine of heading to work and then coming back to the hotel becomes blissful, not having to deal with that lunatic mothman more than necessary. You also get to spend time off with your best friend, which is always a plus.

Well, ‘best friend’ might not be the best way to describe it. You'd developed a crush on the spider demon even before this whole incident occurred, and now that you were spending more time with him, it only continued to grow.

With the line of work you two had, romantic relationships didn't seem to be a thing that crossed anybody's mind since why have a permanent partner when you could just go around fucking the hottest people in Hell? But you knew your feelings were far beyond from sexual, but didn't wanna ruin what you already had going for you.

One heartfelt drunken conversation after work however, makes you do a double take—Angel likes you back. And that both scares and excites you. But with both of you going over the pros and cons with each other, you decide to give it a chance.

You make sure to always have Angel's consent when it comes to physical intimacy—anything from holding his hand, to kissing to just cuddling. He jokes about not being a porcelain doll, but deep down you know he appreciates it.

You're also there for the rough nights, when he comes home wanting nothing more than to die again and let the earth swallow him whole. Words of reassurance are spoken and you can only hold him and let him cry as you vow to do anything in your power to stop this from happening again.

Husker 🍺

As one of the first guests of the hotel, like any wayward sinner, you find yourself in the bar more often than you'd like. Alcohol killed you in the first place, yet not even in the afterlife could you seem to pull yourself from its grasp.

It's a somewhat welcome surprise to find out that the bartender is going through a similar struggle. He still serves you drinks and lends and ear whenever he's not busy, but will occasionally drop the words of wisdom to watch your fill.

Eventually you two find yourselves doing this little back and forth and aid each other when you're in your dark places—Husk won't let you near the bottle if he sees you're about to knock yourself out, meanwhile you're there to look after him when he has one too many drinks and can't take care of himself.

Not to say he isn't a good drinking buddy—you've found out most of the gossip around the hotel thanks to this sneaky little cat demon and there's never a dull moment with him around.

You learn about his deal with Alastor during a particularly bad night, when Husk's had one too many and isn't thinking straight. You don't bring it up, but now have an eye open for whenever the Radio Demon drags your friend away.

Angel's the one who brings up your questionable relationship to the surface.

“So... you two like, fuckin' each other, or what?”

Your entire face goes red, and if it weren't for the dark fur you could swear you see Husk looking the same. He's quick to get rid of Angel's nosy ass, but now the seed has been planted in your brain—do you like Husk that way?

After careful consideration, you come to the conclusion that yes, you do. And it's honestly kinda terrifying considering how relationships don't usually work out in Hell, at least from what you've seen. Besides, even if you did try and confess, there was always the possibility of him not feeling the same and just being embarrassed by Angel's comment.

So in an attempt to make your feelings disappear, you stop frequenting the bar. Who knew the best way to stop drinking habits was trying to avoid spending time with your unrequited crush?

But of course, Husk isn't stupid. He sees the change in your behavior and let's it slide for a while, until he eventually corners you and asks what's wrong. You decide to get it all out of the way and tell him how you feel.

To the embarrassment of both of you, he holds your hand firmly between his and darts his eyes toward the corner of the room. “Next time you should ask before going off assuming things, ya got it?”

And so, your glass may have been empty that day, but your heart had never felt fuller.

Sir Pentious 🐍

You meet Sir Pentious when you sign into the hotel, and your immediate thought is just how can this snake man be so adorkable, it should be illegal.

As you greet the other residents and staff, you're quick to strike a conversation with him, which based on his body language he was not expecting. He starts telling you a bit about his weaponry and other contraptions, and you can't help but be fascinated by it.

You're a bit of a tinkerer yourself, albeit you've only dabbled in small scale projects—nothing compared to the massive canons and aircrafts that Pentious seems to be familiar with.

He acts like a kid opening gifts on Sinmas when he talks to you about his inventions, clearly never having anyone show interest before. Eventually he'll even ask for your input on certain smaller projects he wants to work on to help around the hotel, all to thank Charlie for being so kind to him and giving him a second chance. You're obviously eager to help!

You two start spending so much time together that the egg boys have started calling you ‘Boss #2’, much to Pentious' embarrassment and your amusement.

One afternoon once exercises are done for the day, the snake demon seems much more fidgety than usual as he invites you over to his room to continue working on his security system prototype. He's a blabbering mess once he has you sitting down and your heart just can't help but swell at each little syllable.

“Dearest (y/n)... you've, um, well... you are a huge inspiration for my work! A-And I wouldn't have been able to create any of this... without your help. You are kind, and smart and very talented.... and w-well, um I-”

You gotta silence the man with a kiss otherwise you two would be here all day. He's puddy in your hands and you can only giggle in return. “I really like you too, Pen.”

Everyone is either saying they called it or groaning in annoyance because fucking FINALLY, you two were just dancing around each other like idiots. The egg boys are just so happy to have someone else besides Pentious to be in their lives, and will do their best to look out for you just like with their own boss.

So yeah, prepare yourself for some sickeningly sweet gestures from this guy cause he will go above and beyond to get you what you need/want even if it kills him (again). And you can confidently say that you'd do the same in return.

Alastor 📻

After running in the same circles when you were alive, it's no surprise to you to end up in Hell, although you never would've suspected that you'd find yourself in the same place as him. It was honestly a huge relief not having to go through this all by yourself.

As Alastor exerted his dominance over Hell as the Radio Demon, you were powerful enough to be an Overlord yes, but rather liked keeping it on the down low instead of making a spectacle of yourself (Alastor was the one for theatrics anyway). Because of this, only select few knew of your true power and what you were capable of.

Instead, if there was one thing you were known for, it was being the only soul allowed to be close to the Radio Demon without the risk of death.

Yes, Alastor was a sadistic, cold-blooded and egotistical mastermind, but he wasn't a monster. You knew that better than anyone. Although the reactions he had to other demons treating you like a joke or calling you the ‘Radio Demon's Pet’ were not helping his case.

“ł₣ ɎØɄ V₳ⱠɄɆ ɎØɄⱤ ₴ØɄⱠ, ɎØɄ ₩łⱠⱠ ₩₳Ⱡ₭ ₳₩₳Ɏ Ɽł₲Ⱨ₮ ₦Ø₩ ฿Ɇ₣ØⱤɆ ł Ɽł₱ ł₮ ₳₱₳Ɽ₮ ฿ł₮ ฿Ɏ ฿ł₮...”

“Al, chill. You're gonna make them shit their pants.”

After his seven year absence, you immediately noticed something was wrong with him, and wouldn't stop pestering until he told you the truth—A deal he made and how his soul was now bound to someone much more powerful than he was.

You were obviously mortified and started looking into ways to try and find a loophole to this, but alas the Radio Demon would just give you his signature grin and tell you not to worry about it. It was his battle to face.

But of course you're quick to remind him that you've stuck together through thick and thin even in life, so there was no way you were letting him handle this by himself. You work as a team—always have and always will. You engulf him in a hug.

“We're gonna figure this out, Al. I promise...”

The grin remains, but his eyes widen slightly in surprise. He hesitantly returns the embrace, patting your back and wiping the tears you didn't even know you were shedding.

“There there~ To think such a sweet and innocent soul wound up in a gutter like this. I cannot say I complain as long as I have your delightful company beside me.”

And so when he says he has a plan that involves Princess Charlie Morningstar and her new Happy Hotel, you follow along. Whatever fate has in store for you two, you'll be ready.

Also Charlie is a sweetheart who could do no harm. Knowing Alastor, he'll probably do whatever he can here and there to help around for the cause. You also offer your services as an undercover Overlord, much to everyone's surprise when you reveal your status.

The Radio Demon may have a plan, but something tells you it won't involve bloody murder (unless extremely necessary or if someone really pissed him off).

Like you said—he's not a monster.

Lucifer 🍎

You and Lucifer were good friends at the beginning of Creation. While you were stuck with the tedious task of designing blueprints for the new ‘Human Project’ that headquarters had in store, Lucifer's Seraphim status allowed him to bring creations to life with the flick of a wrist, much to your delight and wonder.

His ideas and pitches for Earth were always so entertaining to listen to, and you would do your best to encourage him to show them to the higher ups to get them approved—His mind was just filled with joy and love and wonder that you'd never seen before.

Which was why it was always so disappointing whenever he'd come back and say that he was shut down and even mocked at. How could Heaven shut down such an imaginative mind in the creation of their biggest project yet?

To say you were devastated when you heard about his fall would be an understatement. You mourned the loss of your friend, knowing that he'd done nothing wrong and thinking it wasn't fair to him to receive such punishment just because he cared for the future of humanity.

Thousands of years later, you overhear the plan for Extermination of Hell kind. You didn't mean to walk by, yet here you were, under the direct eye of the Head Seraphims about to be downcast for something you had no control over—just like Lucifer.

“You're all self-entitled pricks! You think you can do whatever you want just because it doesn't follow what you define as good!”

You get a few good arguments before being cast downwards, leaving you in bad shape in a random alley with no wings and no means of escape. That is of course, until destiny seems to be on your side and Lucifer finds you, completely perplexed to see you here at all.

After getting treated, you tell him about the Extermination so he and Hell can prepare. The conversation of you getting cast down by Heaven gets glossed over, but he can feel the fury building up inside him. You were always doing things by the book—how could they do this to you?

Once the slaughter is over, Lucifer gets a meeting with Heaven and secures protection for both his daughter Charlie and you, to which they begrudgingly agree to keep him outta their hair. You can't help but feel touched by this gesture.

He's also quick to offer you a room to stay in, but you compromise by living in a seperate building from him and Charlie so you aren't a bother even though he says you aren't. In fact, ever since Lilith left, he's had to take care of his young daughter all by himself, so he's more than happy when you offer to help.

It doesn't take long for your feelings to start coming into the surface from all those years ago, and you gotta push them away because he's both married and has a child to look after! Besides, why would the King of Hell ever look in your direction?

Eventually though, he brings up the question with nothing but sweaty palms and a customized rubber ducky that says ‘I love you’ whenever you squeeze it. You blush furiously, but can't help but bring up your concerns, not wanting to replace Lilith in his heart. He looks into your eyes and says that he hasn't been as happy as he is now in the past thousand years.

Cue baby Charlie walking in on everything, and she just smiles and goes innocently. “Daddy! Is (y/n) staying home with us now?”

You two can only chuckle at the cuteness of it and you immediately go to hug her. You couldn't believe that you were blessed with such a wonderful family.

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel spoilers #hazbin hotel x reader #charlie morningstar x reader #vaggie x reader #angel dust x reader #alastor x reader #sir pentious x reader #lucifer morningstar x reader #husker x reader #husk x reader

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3d-wifey · 6 months

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toxic (yandere) baseball player eren and the girl he'd kill for? 👁🫦👁

You Say I'm in Love (I Say You're A Fool)

Pairing: Eren Jaeger x tutor!reader Synopsis: There are many things Eren loves. Word Count: 1.3k Warning: smut, an argument could be made for manipulation, eren is in denial, riding, car sex, overstimulation (reader and eren receiving) A/N: I wrote this in 30 minutes and it shows.

Tag list: @scoven

There are many things Eren loves.

The way his calves burn and lungs heave as he runs from base to base. The resounding cracking noise the bat makes as it hits the baseball. Even the way the infield dirt stains his pants as he slides in to touch the base before a tag out.

But if there's one thing Eren can confidently say he's in love with, it's being between your legs.

It's a known fact that Eren isn't looking for a relationship. He's far too focused on getting scouted. His brother is in the major leagues, after all. So renowned that he has a pitch named after him. It only makes sense that he'd follow in his footsteps.

So, despite the dozens of girls who throw themselves at him and crowd the stands at every game just to get a glimpse of him, he isn't looking for anything serious.

And that fact doesn't change when he starts failing a few classes and his coach makes him take up tutoring with you, his daughter.

It doesn't change the first time he fingers you in his jeep as he drives you to your dorm. It doesn't change whenever he makes you read from a textbook as he eats you out under one of the rickety library tables.

It definitely doesn't change whenever he drags you to the dugout after practice and fucks you so hard that an imprint of the gates is left against your cheek. But you don't mind. His good girl, always so eager to please him.

But when did you become his?

Maybe it was when he warned all his teammates that you were off limits and told them in no uncertain terms that he'd break their fucking fingers they'd have to deal with him if he saw any of them sniffing around you. Or when he didn't see you in the crowd cheering him on at one of his games, and he found himself sending you a few concerned texts.

Ren💚: r u comin?

Ren💚: hello??????

Ren💚: did something happen?

Ren💚: y aren't u answering ur phone???

Ren💚: where the fuck are u?

Ren💚: r u with some1?

Ren💚: I swear to God I'll kill them.

Ren💚: You have till the second inning to be in the stands before I come to you.

Turns out you just overslept with your phone on silent.

Regardless, it's becoming a problem. He can't even get off to porn unless the girl looks like you and even that stops working after a while. Sleeping with anyone else is out of the question. So maybe he has to resort to scrolling through your Instagram when he finds himself in need of inspiration.

Eren's room is pitch black other than the bright light from his phone reflecting off his bare chest. His left-hand holds his phone as he scrolls your page from a burner account while his right hand palms his dick through his sweat pants.

His breath hitches as he stumbles upon the perfect post. It's from last summer when you and your family went to the beach. You were clad in a baby blue bathing suit with little white clouds. He's quick to push his sweatpants down his thighs and take himself in hand.

You had just gotten out of the ocean when you had someone take the photo for you. His pace speeds up as his eyes trace the salty drops of water that dripped down your skin, dipping between your cleavage and between your thighs. He imagines what it would be like to fuck you in that cute, little swimsuit, pushing the crotch of your bottoms aside to go down on you and his hips buck into his hand.

He swipes to the next picture of the set, you on your hands and knees, presumably, playing in the sand as you smile up at the camera, and Eren feels his orgasm ripping through him.

All things considered, his problem with you could be worse.

At least that's what he thinks until he realizes you're eager to please everyone, not just him. Always happy to help, always jumping at the opportunity to be praised, and under normal circumstances, maybe Eren would find it cute or funny, but now it's just fucking annoying.

The team is up for an away game against their rivals and your schedule has finally opened up enough to hang out with Eren after his game. Both of you had been pretty busy, you with midterms and him with practice. He'd never admit this to anyone but you even with a gun to his head, but he's been missing you more than he's missed anything in his entire life. So when you tell him you have to cancel because Jean apparently told your dad he needed some tutoring, he's rightfully pissed off.

Not at you, of course. You're practically in tears when you tell him. It's obvious you don't want to do this, which only fuels his anger.

That piece of shit. Jean is the last fucking person to need help with his homework. Hell, he graduated salutatorian in high school—second only to Armin.

This isn't about grades. He's doing this shit to get under his skin. Is he really this desperate for Eren's sloppy seconds?

He can't stop you from going, but he can send you off with a message.

He has fifteen minutes before he needs to be in the locker room, but you showed up wearing one of his old jerseys and he's already half-hard at the idea of you being in the stands cheering him on with 'Jaeger' printed on your back in big, bold, white letters. Making it known to everyone who you belong to.

And Jean overstepping his bounds pisses him the fuck off. Two birds, one stone. Besides, he doesn't need to be there when the team goes over the play, he's the one who made it.

His pants are pulled down to his thighs and you're bare from the waist down, wearing nothing but his jersey. He grips your hips tight, fucking little gasps out of you. One of your hands claps his shoulder while the other holds the car handle for dear life. Your cheeks are wet, almost as wet as you've made his lap.

He's overstimulated you both, a ring of white, frothy cum grows at the base of his shaft with each downward swing of your hips. That painful pleasure tightens his balls every time your sensitive walls spasm around his equally sensitive cock.

"E-Eren, I—fuck, fuck, fuck, ahhh—” You cut yourself off with a moan that slithers around his spine, pushing him to go faster, harder, deeper. This position is perfect, you're practically boneless over him as the head of his dick punches your g-spot.

"One more, baby. Just, hah, give me one more." And you nod your head from where you're crying into his neck. You leave his skin wet with tears and spit as you bite at him to muffle yourself. He doesn't have the heart to tell you each twinging bite is only making him harder, the grind of your canines that'll surely leave blotches and maybe even thin pricks of blood only makes him feel like he could fuck you for hours—days even! It feels too good, your pussy is too good to leave alone. A fact that Jean will never know.

"Mhm, okay, Ren." Despite your fatigue, your hips shift towards him, rutting your clit against his happy trail like you can't help yourself. "One more. One, uh, uh, uh, more for you." You agree, pulling his hair out of its messy bun in your haze. His good girl, not even thinking about the fact that he asked for one more the last three times, you're too full of his dick to think for yourself now. He would have cooed at you if it weren't for the tears blurring his own vision, toes curling in his shoes. By the time he finishes, you'll be full of his cum too. The game be damned.

After all, Eren Jaeger isn't known for his impulse control.

#3d wifey answers #eren jeager x reader #eren jeager smut #eren jeager #eren x reader #eren yeager #eren jaeger #aot smut #aot eren #attack on titan smut #attack on titan

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stsgluver · 9 months

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synopsis. after too many years, gojo has his family together again.

wc. 810

tags. lovers-to-strangers-to-lovers!au

series link !

"so are you two back together?"

you and gojo share a surprised look that that was the first question that tsumiki asked. yes, you had acknowledged the status of your relationship would be brought up in this small cafe meeting with tsumiki and megumi, but admittedly you'd hoped it would've come up far later in the conversation. if at all.

beyond your initial comment about how leaving him had impacted you, there hadn't been much discussion on anything regarding the two of you together. the jujutsu world was one of heartache and pain and neither of you were brave enough to take the dive into another heartbreak that would surely kill you both.

you cleared your throat, ignoring the heat that had risen to your cheeks as you shook your head, "no, no, we are just friends." gojo gave a tight-lipped smile and nodded in agreement.

just friends aren't still deeply in lo-

"-being away from this place wasn't as... cleansing for the soul as i'd hoped it to be so i came back," you explained and tsumiki eyed you both suspiciously.

tsumiki had been thirteen and megumi twelve when you had left. they had always been insightful children and knew something was wrong before you and gojo officially ended things. neither had expected you to leave them, however, and it had taken megumi some convincing to come to the cafe at all to see you.

he'd barely acknowledged you at jujutsu high.

"so you're back for good?" tsumiki asked and you nodded, causing a wide grin to appear on her face, "yay! i've really hated being the only girl in the house-"

"-she's not moving back in," gojo cut her off more harshly than intended and he bit his tongue, sending you an apologetic glance.

you brushed it off, leaning across the table to lightly squeeze tsumiki's hand, "i'll definitely come over and visit. I've missed our friday girl's nights." it wasn't enough to make her smile as it had before, but at least one night a week was definitely better than the zero she'd had for three and a half years.

"are you sure you should be coming back?"

everything around you stilled and you're once again reminded of how observant megumi was, even as a young teenager. it reflected his muddled childhood and you felt a pang of guilt for only further causing an issue which forced him to mature more quickly than he should've had to.

"i'm okay now megs, i promise," you said sincerely, "everything was just getting a little too much and i could barely focus. i didn't want to get someone hurt on a mission because of my mistakes. you're stuck with me now though. forever." your promise did little to subside the unease that megumi felt but he nodded his head in recognition nonetheless.

the silence of a thousand unsaid words settled between the four of you, each of you deciding that staring at your drinks were more fascinating.

gojo decided that this was his opportunity to make his coffee to just his liking and began pouring in several tubes of sugar at once.

you scoffed at his behaviour as he reached for three more, "how do you have any teeth left?"

gojo gave your drink a disgusted glance, "if you tell me that you like the bitter flavour of coffee, i'll be the one who leaves this time." whilst you'd like to say that you were shocked that he was making jokes so soon, you'd be lying. this was how he coped. had it not been for the circumstance, you think you would've been a little happier for that - this gojo was still your gojo.

you diverted your attention back to megumi, "you still remember the pins to gojo's cards right?" he nodded with a smirk in gojo's direction. "perfect!" you placed your hand on gojo's forearm that rested on the table as you grinned up at him. he did his best not to visibly react to feeling the warm of your touch, even through the fabric of his shirt. "we'll be okay without you." however, the way your fingers naturally hold onto his shirt a little bit tighter than necessary screamed otherwise.

gojo dramatically rolled his eyes, tsking as you 'ganged' up on him, "oh so now you're all using me for my money? shocked but not surprised."

"well it's definitely not your personality that keeps us around," megumi quipped and gojo gasped as he clutched a hand to his shirt in faux agony. for a boy who so often kept his emotions hidden beneath a facade, no one missed the quirk of his lips into a small smile.

for a moment, a very brief fleeting moment, gojo was content. in front of him were the three most important people in his life and, relationships aside, his family was together again.

tag list below cut:

@trinityimagines ! @karmcrim15 ! @sagekko! @hoejosfavhoe ! @hilzup ! @planetnini ! @mariapierce789 ! @deegausserr ! @shoutoandsatorubrainrot ! @keilaq1 !

if you have any suggestions or any ideas for this series please let me know!!

#gojo #gojo satoru #lovers-to-strangers-to-lovers!au #gojo fluff #gojo drabble #satoru #gojo x yn #gojo x reader #gojo oneshot #gojo fic

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azullumi · 1 year

Text

wanderer and ayato — a family with them ☆彡

summary — family and children, how would they be as a parent and husband?

characters — wanderer and ayato (w/ gender-neutral reader)

tags — fluff, established relationship, familial relationships; headcanons

word count — 1348

a/n — this mainly focuses on what they're like around their children hahahahahah

WANDERER

Wanderer, however rough his personality is, actually shows himself getting along with children and being good at dealing with them, especially ones of his own blood, quite well. It was surprising actually, pleasantly surprising, him being able to get along with kids and having a soft spot for them was a fact you never knew but definitely needed to know.

Of course, it's not like he was immediately as accepting, unafraid, nor open as he is right as of the moment. He was once afraid, clueless, and anxious because he didn't want to end up accidentally hurting his child and it took him some time to overcome that, reassuring himself that children are not as fragile as he thinks.

After overcoming that fear of his, when he first held the hand of his child, he felt like breaking down and crying on his knees. When he first carried them in his arms, he held them gently yet filled with fear. How could a child be so small and soft? From then on, he was determined to protect and give the world to them.

If he has more than one (or multiple) child, he would try to treat them fairly and equally, he makes sure that no one is left out of anything or feeling like they're not being paid attention to. After all, he doesn't want them to experience the same things that he did. He knows how horrible it feels and he couldn't imagine having them go through that.

He would give them everything that they wish for but on certain conditions that they must pass or follow. He doesn't want them to become spoiled children who'll cry whenever they won't get something that they want as he doesn't like that. His conditions aren't that complex nor hard though.

"I'll give you that as long as you promise to always be a good child."

He’s protective. Not over or too much but he’s definitely protective as majority of the time he’s worried about their safety or them encountering any kind of danger so it causes him to become strict when the situation calls for it. Permissions will often be asked from him especially when it's about going somewhere quite far away.

“My friends invited me to hangout and play with them on the river."

"Honey, you have to ask your father for permission. You know that even if I'll allow you, he always has the last say."

Ultimately, he'll end up allowing them but someone has to accompany them and it's either you or him.

Although as time passes by and his children have grown, he becomes less strict and protective. Becoming a carefree father as he just lets his children do anything that they want as long as they know what they are doing and are responsible with their actions. However, he still enforces some rules on them like curfews so they don’t get overboard and carried away.

He has a playful side that he shows to his children, occasionally teasing them but then silently panicking if they would end up crying because he doesn't know how to deal with that. Probably told them that Santa isn't real

"(Name), they are crying."

"Did you make them cry again? I told you not to do that."

He always has time for his family, spending more than half of his day bonding and just being there for you and his children. He doesn’t wish to become an absent figure and wants to show that he’s always there not only for you but also for them also.

He never knows if he's being good enough for his children so thoughts often wander and linger inside his head, thinking and believing that he’s not a good father, however, his children think otherwise as they see him as the best father that they could have.

He's doing everything that he can to be the father that his children need and not be lacking towards them, through his own actions, words, and methods, he displays his affection and support for them in multiple ways.

KAMISATO AYATO

The pure definition of a loving, doting, and affectionate father. Overprotective and strict, especially if he has a daughter.

He tries to be sweet and understanding towards his children, giving them full support and showering them with love always. It's a given that he'll get along with his children easily knowing him and his personality.

He spoils them with gifts always and wouldn't hesitate in buying them what they ask for. He tries his best to make time for them and spend time with them, often finishing his duties early and immediately.

"I'm here."

"You're early, what about your duties?"

"I finished them, my love. Anyways, where are they?"

He'll support his children in whatever path they'll choose and go down on. They want to be an artist? Full support for them and he would even buy the materials that they need. If they even need someone to teach them, he'll hire a professional. A samurai? A blacksmith? A fisherman? Or anything in general, they'll have his full support. As long as it's not anything dangerous or just illegal.

He would take his family on vacations and places when they wish to unwind and just relax. They could go to Mondstadt, Liyue, Sumeru, or anywhere they wish as long as they can and as long as his duties and responsibilities as the head wouldn't get in the way.

However, in times of festivals wherein he's one of the organizers and handlers, he wouldn't be able to accompany you nor his children in walking around and having fun in the said event. Thus you're left explaining everything to your children.

"Will father not come with us?"

"Sadly, I don't think he'll be able to, sweetie. But who knows, he might be with us later. For now, let's just enjoy everything, okay? Your father has prepared everything here and we should appreciate it!"

On rare occasions, he'll actually show up last minute and accompany you all in walking around and at those scarce moments, you'll have these memories burned in your memories.

In contrast to his sweetness and loving side though, he's actually strict and overprotective. It can't be helped though as he's the head of the Kamisato Clan and people are often out for his throat. His child becoming involved in these dangers are inevitable so he has to be wary and careful everytime to avoid any catastrophe or tragedy from happening.

Usually, when they would go out, he would have people following them and protecting them from the dark as it would ease his mind since he can't be there for them in case something happens. Knowing that they're with the people he trusts just clears his worries.

He's also cautious and mistrustful around the people they are surrounded with, you will never know who's trustworthy or who's going to stab your back. Everyone is considered a threat especially towards his family.

He doesn't wish to put pressure on his own children and would wish for them to leave a life wherein they are able to reach and achieve their dreams. However, he does understand that someone has to be the heir of his position and will soon become head of the family. It's just some wishful thinking that his children could live a carefree life that he couldn't have.

"Will my children live a happy life?"

"I'm sure they will, they have a great father like you."

"What if I'm not?"

"Oh, you definitely are."

That doesn't mean that he's not happy right now, however. He has everything that he could ever wish for, a loving family of his with an amazing partner like you. He's leading a fulfilling and successful life so how could he ever be ungrateful? He only wishes for his children to live a life wherein they're happy also.

Overall, despite his busy schedule and everything, he tries to always be there for his children no matter what and he'll probably never know how thankful they are to have a father like him.

— navigation | masterlist

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islandofsages · 4 months

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hello~ I'd like to request malleus, idia, and azul reacting to gn!reader either kicking rollo in the balls, punching him, setting him on fire (or any form of violence, your choice!!) when noble bell college does a visit to nrc <3

characters: azul, idia and malleus x gender neutral yuu

tags: relationship not specified, crack (?), imagines format

warnings: rollo gets pranked (gone right)

author's notes: i. got carried away again and made this yuu SORRY PLEASE FORGIVE ME also i made it more mild bc i dont wanna get hashtag cancelled by the rollo enjoyers ... i am of neutral standing ok dont come for me

It took you by surprise - when the headmage announced some students from Noble Bell College will be coming over for a foreign exchange program and that you’ll have to act as a representative of your dorm, all you could think about was the events from the last time you and a few friends visited Noble Bell College. It was disastrous, it was exhausting, and you definitely don’t want another repeat of them. But most importantly, you feel like Rollo didn't quite learn his lesson.

You understand Malleus is as benevolent as they come but… you certainly aren't. Thinking about Rollo again makes your blood boil. What right does he have to strip people of their magic, simply because he lost his brother to it? It's a blatant misplacement of his own emotions and they had to suffer the consequences of someone whose denial is stronger than Malleus himself. You try not to grit your teeth at the announcement.

Though when they finally step into Night Raven’s grounds, it’s a different story entirely.

A pack of them make their way to the entrance where you await them, Rollo at the lead. You and the other housewardens stand patiently in a neat little line. Being right next to Malleus grants you a preview of his reaction up close and so you take your chances - he’s grinning. Of course he is. Ever since that day, it feels as if Malleus sees Rollo as some kind of toy. But you couldn’t blame him, considering the way Rollo played everyone first.

After what feels like eternity, the Noble Bell College boys finally begin greeting you all. They exchange handshakes and pleasantries with you while you put on your best practiced smile. You can’t see their faces but you assume Azul and Idia are a bit tense, being face-to-face with Rollo again. You have no energy to spare for anxiety.

So when Rollo comes to shake hands with you, his face unreadable, your rehearsed smile grows as you take his hand in yours. He walks away with the same amount of emotion he put into that forced handshake and your eyes trail after him. You go back to waiting, your hands clasped in front of you.

In the blink of an eye, Rollo starts shaking uncontrollably, as if being electrocuted. You fight back the urge to laugh at the sight. Though you were a bit concerned about the prank going wrong and severely injuring him instead, the fact that he’s still standing with a perplexed look on his face tells you that nothing went wrong.

Azul Ashengrotto

He jumps slightly at the sight of Rollo’s body contorting in a strange way but once he realizes it occurs a few seconds after he shook hands with you, he hides a twisted smile beneath his hand

He would praise you after the theatrics are over. You shrug it off, mentioning that you just searched up simple pranks online to get back at Rollo

He laughs at your casual admittance to wanting to trick someone who attempted to drain all the magic from Twisted Wonderland. It’s no wonder Rook calls you the Trickster

“Still, even a simple prank like that caught him off guard. That’ll teach him that not every form of revenge has to be grand and catastrophic.”

You dismiss it, admitting to originally intending to resort to kicking Rollo in the balls but you’re afraid of getting caught and being under the headmage’s scrutiny is the last thing you need right now

After that confession, he watches himself, knowing the kinds of tricks you’re willing to pull

You’re certainly a different kind of twisted.

Idia Shroud

He lets out a small “eep!” at the sight of Rollo suddenly acting so weirdly, thinking that he’s glitching out or something along those nerdy lines

After the whole ordeal, he’d think over the event again and come to the conclusion that you somehow manage to tase him from afar

You approach him and confirm his suspicions, to which he responds with his signature creepy giggle (affectionate). He asks you how you pulled it off

“A magician never reveals their secrets, I’m afraid.”

He pouts at your answer but he respects your commitment to the bit plus he bets you got them off the ‘Net, literally everything is there

He would randomly bring it up with Azul in Board Game Club meetings and the two of them would laugh over it

…Little does Azul know that’s just Idia’s tactic of distracting him from the game.

Malleus Draconia

His eyes widen at the sudden movement but then he sneaks a glance at you. You don’t reciprocate but he smirks either way. He knows

After the meet-and-greet, he commends you on the trick and that he was very much amused by it

“Well played, child of man. It’s simple enough that he wouldn’t be able to notice.”

You grin proudly, satisfied that you got your revenge and that your trick was worthy of his attention

He then asks you if you’re gonna pull off any more such tricks. Huh. You didn’t think that far honestly

Because he plans on joining in on your pranks if you would have him

You don’t tell him that you actually just planned that one trick but hey, you’re not going to say no to exacting more vengeance on Rollo.

#twst #twisted wonderland #twst x reader #twisted wonderland x reader #twst x yuu #twisted wonderland x yuu #platonic twst x reader #platonic twisted wonderland x reader #azul ashengrotto #azul ashengrotto x reader #idia shroud #idia shroud x reader #malleus draconia #malleus draconia x reader #rollo flamme #twst x mc

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lynnieos · 21 days

Text

Hey is it just me or do certain fans complain about how much they hate the other groups instead of loving theirs.

I don't think calling out the misogyny in this fandom is wrong, not in the slightest (my most popular post is calling out the way people treat ena versus akito because of their gender), but most of the time these call out posts just result in more negativity and arguments rather than any like. Productive discussion.

I don't wanna hear about how minoharu and anhane are more canon than ruikasa and akitoya and are Therefore More Valid And Liking Ruikasa More Is Wrong And Bad (exaggerated but most of the time people do insult a ship in order to promote their own) (also sometimes implies that rarepairs are less valid which is a dick move). I wanna hear about the interesting (and I mean very interesting) relationship that an has with kohane, her feelings of inadequacy and slight envy, I wanna hear about how minori (and the rest of mmj) inspired haruka to get back on the stage, and how minori finally got to "repay" haruka in a way.

I didn't start liking ichika because of people endlessly complaining about how underutilized she is and how You Guys Just Don't Get Her, Read The Stories And you'll Discover That She's Actually Perfect Actually (this one isn't an exaggeration but it was on YouTube not Tumblr so in it goes), I started liking her because I learned about her character, her sheer determination and love for her friends, and her want to resonate with people's hearts from people who really like her.

I'm not gonna pretend the Ruikasa fandom and akitoya fandom can't be annoying, a lot of them are toxic and have a habit of making everything about Ruikasa/akitoya while reducing their relationships with other characters to push their shipping narrative. It pisses me off. A lot. I could write (and probably will write) an entire essay on how entitled and bitchy Ruikasa/akitoya fans can be, and I definitely understand how it can build up resentment towards a ship, and how their mass popularity is most definitely attributed to the fact that they are men (which results in an extreme lack of understanding of their actual characters and overall dynamic, reducing them to "top tall sexy one" and "bottom cute feminine one" which upsets me to hell and back). And calling this out is not wrong in the slightest.

but needlessly attacking a ship that someone likes is not a call out. calling Ruikasa and akitoya "a stupid ship" is not a call out. Actively insulting people for liking it is not a call out. Adding Ruikasa and akitoya tags to your post bashing them is not a callout. It's being a dick. You are not doing anything productive by calling Ruikasa and akitoya shippers idiots or stupid or insulting their taste you are only going to piss people off and you know that you are going to piss people off.

Acknowledge but do not attack. Be civil. And if you cant be civil then save everyone some time and keep it private.

Oh yeah. And be annoying about your blorbos. Make KING kanamafu art. Put shizuairi in Fragile. Talk about how much you love your girl ships and your girl characters and don't event mention the guys, make fanfiction and fanart of the girls, I really really want you to, genuinely, because they do get less rep in the fandom than their male counterparts, so more content of the girls is always great. It feels a lot better than complaining about a ship you don't even like, I promise

(Btw I mention this in the tags but if anyone wants to add input or correct me on something you totally can. My words aren't law and this post is just me stating my thoughts, and I invite you to share yours if you want.)

#also if anyone has anything they want to add or correct me on and add some input that's fine btw #and one more thing. “be civil” applies to everyone. including akitoya and ruikasa fans. dont call other ships irrelevant dont attack them-#DONT ATTACK THE OTHER RUI AND TSUKASA SHIPS BECAUSE YOU DONT LIKE THEM. FUCK #project sekai #prsk #my writing

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sexcromancy · 3 months

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young adult, new adult, and fantasy fiction: the audience of a book is who reads it

title clumsily based on the purpose of a system is what it does.

before we begin, I want to focus a bit on defining our terms. young adult, new adult, adult, science fiction/fantasy, speculative fiction, contemporary romance - all of the terms I will use in this post are created by marketing companies and readers, and all of them have fuzzy and subjective applicability to any given book. there is no objectivity in cataloging, which is the lens through which I approach knowledge organization projects like this. there is no definitive answer to what any given book or genre "is", because these categories are not fixed values. instead, their values are expanded and developed by what gets placed in which category, by whom, and what criteria they base that decision on. that's what I want to discuss.

to provide some context: debates over age categories and who is reading what books for which age ranges currently dominate discussions among publishers, authors, librarians, and readers. ages of characters in YA are skewing up, sales are slowing down. young adult as a category has existed for 50+ years, but it is currently undergoing some growing pains. here's one more article for good measure. new adult is a term created by the publishing industry in 2009, which developed in fits and starts despite multiple bestselling authors publishing under the category. oh well. in 2015, sarah j mass published her new book, a court of thorns and roses, which is widely regarded as a turning point for the popularity of new adult (more on the classification of ACOTAR itself in a moment). NA stalled out for many years, but has recently very quickly grown in popularity, especially for romance readers on booktok. some of the most popular books listed under new adult on goodreads are colleen hoover's it ends with us and it starts with us, ali hazelwood's check & mate, and rebecca yarros' fourth wing.

I want to look at two of these currently very popular authors as case studies to really dig into what new adult has come to mean.

in this 2014 interview, SJM discusses her currently running throne of glass series and the upcoming release of ACOTAR in 2015. she notes that the book is intended for "a slightly older YA crowd (aka steamy times ahead!)". earlier in the interview, she dodges a question about whether throne of glass will be YA or NA by saying she appreciates her teen and adult readers - if I had to guess, the label was still too new and publishers didn't want to alienate anyone. in 2023, I can't find anything on her website or bookseller sites that specifically identify the series (or any of her series) as YA, NA, or adult. however, Goodreads (which relies on user generated tags and is, to put it lightly, a mess wrt information organization) firmly classes ACOTAR as YA - almost 9k tags in young-adult and ya (lack of authority control is just one aspect of the mess), as opposed to about 3.5k new-adult. the thing is, though, ACOTAR comes up in essentially every blog post and article I read on the definition of new adult. it is a flashpoint in the discussion: it either did or didn't restart the term, it is or isn't too sexually explicit to be classed for teens, the writing is filled with young adult tropes and this does or does not matter. the answers to these questions aren't particularly important to me, but it's very interesting to see how people are attempting to draw those boundaries. I took a quick census of how SJM's series are classed in my library system. her throne of glass series is uniformly shelved in YA; ACOTAR is mostly YA with a few copies in adult, and her newer crescent city series is mostly adult with a few copies in YA. I do think that any discussion of ACOTAR is partially colored by this divisive relationship to the new adult category itself, so I'd also like to bring in a much newer book facing similar conversation.

if you follow this blog you might already know that I have an entirely non-neutral relationship to ali hazelwood; I love her books both as books and as cultural objects deserving of study. previously, she published three adult romance novels and a set of adult romance novellas, which all fall firmly and inarguably into those defined categories, based on age range and content (I have an argument for the love hypothesis being a horror story, but that's a different conversation). last year, she published her newest book, check & mate, as a young adult romance. it was widely marketed as such by the young readers imprint at putnam. however, on reading it, I (and many goodreads commenters) were surprised to find that it aligned more with some hallmarks of new adult. the characters are out of high school, and the challenges and growth moments are more focused on evolution, rather than coming of age. one blog post I read made the argument that YA is about high school firsts and NA is about adulthood firsts. this is amorphous, partially because there is no real one life path into adulthood by which to judge this, so let's switch focus to something more concrete: sex. in each of Ali's adult novels, there are a few explicit sex scenes. they're not as explicit as other romance novels, but they're definitely not fade-to-black. in check & mate, characters have sex, but it happens entirely off-screen and any discussion is fairly chaste or, at most, relying heavily on implied content. this is a real disconnect to me. much of NA lit (ACOTAR included) is quite sexually explicit. among those most popular NA books on goodreads, there are many books that get marketed specifically for their sexual content (spicy🌶️ to the tiktokers, smut to everyone else). to me, this cements check & mate as a YA novel - if she was going to write a book with explicit sex, like her others, she could've. she's mentioned in interviews that her chess novel concept originally featured older characters, and she aged them down once she realized what kind of story she wanted to tell. to me, it is telling that moving from adult to YA creates more clumsy caution around the handling of sex, as opposed to SJM, whose books "aged" upwards over time.

another interesting example I've noticed in the emerging NA space is how the age category intersects with genre. YA as a category has a pretty expansive genre playing field - we've all read YA fantasy, contemporary romance, historical fiction, action/adventure, issue novels, etc. NA so far seems pretty exclusively limited to romance as a main focus, especially in the most popular offerings as discussed above.

I've seen many a tiktok alleging that despite the drawn out fight scenes, extensive lore, and huge interconnected web of characters, the ACOTAR books are not "real fantasy." even more so for the fourth wing books. I've seen these books compared to Tolkien, as if to say, well, if you didn't invent a language, you're not really on the same level. that's entirely unfair, imo - plenty of fantasy doesn't engage at that level. but there is a wide array of contemporary fantasy I do think we can contrast with ACOTAR and other popular NA series.

we've discussed some of the hallmarks of YA and NA as categories: the age range of characters, coming of age, explicit sex for NA. i'd add fast-paced, immersive writing, especially in first person or close third, because so much of the appeal described on booktok is a book sucking you in completely. now, i want to bring up a few books that, on the surface, might check several of these boxes: dune by frank herbert has an 18yo protagonist, and the first book is very much a coming of age story. eragon (christopher paolini) and the name of the wind (patrick rothfuss) focus on a young person coming into their magical abilities through school/mentorship, a similar setting to many YA series. mistborn (brandon sanderson) and game of thrones (george r.r. martin) both have prominent protagonists that are 18 or younger when the story starts. of all these series, only eragon has young-adult as its most popular age-related tag on goodreads, and eragon was, at the time of release, very specifically marketed to and shelved in young adult in bookstores and libraries. some of these books have explicit or non-explicit sexual content, but only GOT has even close to as much as your average NA novel (to my knowledge).

i am not alleging that any of these books should be classed as YA, necessarily. but the glaring difference in their marketing and readership does point to one thing: these books are largely about men, and they are all written by men. i am not the first person to point out this gender gap in fantasy writing, and i don't have anything particularly new to say about it, except to bring it back around to my original point. none of these novels "are" adult fiction, and plenty (plenty!) of teenagers read them, in an interesting reversal of the trends in YA. who is making the decisions about where these books go, and why? what can we draw out about the books and their marketing? how is the future of "adult fantasy" shaped when these are the benchmarks by which we measure new entries?

i did also look into a few of my own favorite sci-fi series by women to see how they ranked by similar parameters. parable of the sower by octavia butler, featuring an 18yo protagonist and sexual content, has no age category at all in the top 20 most popular goodreads tags. it's in adult fiction in every library in my system that owns a copy. ive seen gideon the ninth (18yo protag, and yeah lets go ahead and say explicit sexual content) on YA shelves in bookstores, but its adult tag on goodreads is more popular, and almost every library in my system has it in adult. in my opinion, these books are important in rejecting the "women write YA, men write adult" narrative around speculative fiction, but they're not necessarily an exception to a different trend. it is not difficult for me to think of more adult scifi/fantasy books by women, because i actively seek them out. however, almost every single one of them has a protagonist under 25, as is the case with so much of the adult fantasy written by men listed above. last year, i read the adventures of amina al-sirafi, by s.a. chakrabotry, which was (i believe) the first non-contemporary/realistic fiction book ive ever read with a middle aged mother as the main protagonist. the book club at my library branch, mainly composed of middle aged and older women, read it, and expressed such genuine joy and excitement over a fantastic, adventurous book featuring a woman they saw themselves in. representation really does matter, and it matters to everyone, not just young people. but that's a different soapbox.

young readers are extremely picky. i've watched many a teenager (or younger) browse the YA section and turn up their noses at books with a cringey cover, an overly dramatic blurb, or just because. marketing books to teens is hard. booktok is an incredibly powerful marketing tool and divisive social force. it skyrockets an author one day and by the next week, other accounts are tearing that same author to shreds. in this environment, its no surprise that the sensationalized books - extremely good or extremely bad, blatantly sexual, shocking, consumable - become flashpoints of discussion. who should be reading ya? who is it for? what is inappropriate for young teenagers to read? what is inappropriate for adults to read? i think about these topics a lot, especially as what the publishing industry terms a "gatekeeper" - i'm a children's librarian; i control the access teenagers in my community have to these books. i take that role seriously, and i want to be thinking deeply about the books i put in my YA section and who will read them. our decisions, about where we class books, how we label and present them, how we discuss them: that is part of what dictates what genre and age classification a book "is", in addition to marketing.

#okay.... been working on this on and off for months but im finally fucking finishing and posting an essaY!!!!#2k words on genre classification lfggggg #please let me know what you think.... very open to thoughts esp from people who read these areas !!!!#ok to reblog btw :>#frames

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blackbird-brewster · 22 days

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Meta: Jemily Queerbaiting

With the huge influx of posts saying 'Jemily is gonna be canon', I really appreciated seeing this post because OP was completely correct. I didn't want to write an entire dissertation as a reply, so I'm making my own post with my personal opinion on this. (All sources are noted in footnotes)

Before I began this rant, for anyone who thinks this is anti-Jemily. It is not. I have shipped Jemily for 18 friggin years and that's never going to change. This post is specifically my thoughts about queer baiting.

First off, I need to note that the showrunners (and the cast members who use social media) KNOW what a huge queer following this show has and that's why we got pansexual Tara Lewis in S16 [1]. Which, in itself, was SOOOOOOO important!!! Our first canonically queer main in SIXTEEN seasons was a middle-aged Black woman!!! That's phenomenal. (The fact it was horrible rep, because they instantly ruined her relationships once her queerness served it's plot point is a whole other post entirely)

In my opinion, the 'big Jemily moment' Paget posted about on Twitter [2] (and AJ hinted at during a recent IG live) is simply queerbaiting to get people to watch S17. I know a lot of you are newer to the fandom and I love your enthusiasm, I really do, ship and let ship, but listen, let's be real, Jemily is not going to be made canon. The showrunners aren't going to suddenly say (after 17 seasons) 'Surprise, Jemily is endgame'. This show has never cared about queer rep and now that CBS/Paramount have already ticked their queer rep box with Tara, they won't be in any rush to add any other characters to it.

Please buckle in, I've got a lot of thoughts on this matter --

What is Queerbaiting?

If you aren't aware of what queerbaiting is, here's a good definition:

Historically, queerbaiting has carried two meanings: the first is an act of aggressive heterosexuality to shut down queer subtext on screen while still teasing and catering to the queer audience in advertising, public relations, and fan engagement strategies; the second is an existing homoerotic tension between two characters played up on screen while met with derision by the professionals behind the scenes. [3]

The Medium article quoted here is from 2017, a time when parasocial relationships were really starting to take over social media. In 2024, actors are now only a mention or tag away online, they have direct conversations with fans, and this process has allowed for an even deeper form of queerbaiting.

Oftentimes online, actors are asked directly about certain ships and while some ignore these questions (usually to avoid breaking their contracts or other repercussions), others (looking at you, Paget) choose to instead tease fans about queer ships. She's done this for years upon years and if I've learned anything in the past twenty-years of existing in fandom spaces it's this -- don't hold your breath. In it's original meaning, for something to be deemed as queerbaiting there had to be malicious, or at least, purposeful intent to string queer fans along by teasing them with suggestive content about the ship in question, while knowing this ship will never come to fruition in canon.

The thing to remember is, Paget and AJ aren't the only ones who know about Jemily shippers -- the network and showrunners are well aware of this ship too. When networks/showrunners figure out they have a strong sapphic fanbase, they love to use that to their advantage to get more viewers and higher ratings. Queerbaiting is a goldmine to keep fans watching long running shows, look at Rizzoli and Isles, Supergirl, and OUAT for examples of this.

Jemily and Queerbaiting:

Ever since Emily joined the BAU in S2 (2006), there have always been fans who ship JJ/Emily (shoutout to the old LJ forums!). Way before celebs were just a tweet away from fans, back when all our fics began with disclaimers so we wouldn't get sued by networks, we went to great lengths to keep our fanworks far removed from actors/showrunners attention.

As far as Jemily goes, this reply from Paget in a 2009 interview with TVGuide.com [4] (which has now been deleted from their site unfortunately, but there are quotes on Tumblr still [4.a]) confirmed some fans' worst fear -- the actors had found our fanworks online.

TVGuide.com: Of course, a band of fans want her to hook up with Hotch.

Brewster: I know! I didn't realize that fans make these videos on YouTube? A.J. Cook sent me a hilarious one that made it look like Prentiss and J.J. were having a secret lesbian affair. You know, when Hotch was blown up in the SUV, we shot this scene where he's in the hospital and I'm standing next to him, looking at his bleeding ear. Our director came in and said, "Paget, you're looking at Hotch like you're in love with him. It looks really weird." So now, every day, Thomas [Gibson] and I flutter our eyelids at each other.

This was the first time I recall anyone acknowledging Jemily shippers publicly and at the time (Jan 2009), the show was still in Season Four (just before CBS fired both AJ and Paget [5]). Paget genuinely said it's 'hilarious' that fans shipped JJ/Emily. Even now, I'll see people say 'We know Paget and AJ have seen Jemily fanvids, so they obviously ship it too' -- but those same people rarely acknowledge the full context of the original answer. Paget not only thought JJ/Emily were 'hilarious', but then she doubled down and turned her reply back to how she and Thomas liked to play up the chemistry between Emily/Hotch.

While no one can say for sure which video it was that AJ sent Paget, just knowing they were watching JJ/Emily fanvids sent a bit of a shockwave through the femslash side of the fandom. To some it felt like an invasion of privacy, fanworks are by fans for fans -- knowing the cast were poking around in fandom spaces added an extra layer of worry around what we fans were posting online. Fifteen years ago, it used to be quite taboo for actors to outwardly discuss shipping or other fanon for whatever show they were in, and we fans were usually comfortably removed from the actors altogether.

Of course, now it's the norm for fans and actors/showrunners to co-exist online and interact with one another. This connection has opened new ways for shows to queerbait their fans. Pretty much every show has some form of social media account now and there is no doubt that the people running those accounts keep up with the most popular ships and hashtags. Not to mention that actors are constantly barraged with questions about whether they ship their character with x,y,z, or whether they think a ship should be made canon, etc. These interactions only serve to benefit the shows themselves, because whether the conversation is for or against a certain ship, it's all just free publicity (Why do you think CM now has a TikTok account?)

Every time AJ or Paget say anything about Jemily, the queer side of the fandom loses their minds. But this has been going on for YEARS now and every single time, it turns out to be nothing but social media hype and queerbaiting. Remember this AJ post? [6] Or what about the notorious reply by Paget to a fan, where she talks about how she and AJ held hands under the table 'for the shippers' [7] I've seen this cycle over and over again, so perhaps I am cynical, but I'm not getting my hopes up that Jemily will ever seriously be canon.

It's widely known now, after both Kirsten [8] and Paget [9] have talked about it, that there was an early idea where Prentiss was supposed to be queer, but that was ultimately scraped before it ever made it on screen. For context, please remember, this show has been airing for nearly twenty years. It began in 2005, during the highly conservative Bush administration. Queer people didn't have rights in the US, we couldn't get married, we were rarely protected under discrimination laws, and we could even be fired for simply being queer (in some states). Diverse queer representation on screen was extremely limited to things like 'The L Word' and 'Queer as Folk' (both aired on Showtime, so they were behind a paywall. And as far as tLw goes, that show was extremely male-gaze focused and is horrible in nearly all regards if you try to rewatch it now). As far as prime time shows went, queer rep was even more rare. Which is why Emily wasn't queer from the get-go.

Yes, things have changed since 2006 in terms of queer rep on TV. We have a myriad of queer identities represented in TV and film nowadays, which is why I think it's so easy for newer fans to say 'lf she was supposed to be gay anyway, they should just make Emily queer in canon!' I know this is what fuels most fans' demands for Emily being confirmed queer, and I get it, I DO. I would be all for it! However, I do not, in one hundred years, actually believe that is going to happen after they already canonically queer confirmed Tara in S16. The fact we even got ONE queer character is ground-breaking for this show.

It's also worth noting, that in the time between Paget's departure in 2012 and her return in 2016, she became very active on Twitter. This was when more and more fans began asking her about Jemily and after Kirsten's AfterEllen interview, fans also pushed for Paget to address the possibility of Emily being gay. 'Pushed' is actually an understatement for some of the outright harassment she would receive. (AJ received some of this harassment too, but less so because she doesn't use social media ass often) Back then, neither of them replied to these things directly. Yet, no matter what either woman posted, the replies were full of Jemily stans begging for her acknowledgement. (Did you know 'stan' is literally a term coined for stalker fans?) I remember one time AJ's friend was missing and she posted info on her IG about it, you know what the replies were? People asking her about Jemily. It was genuinely sickening.

Within this context, it was no surprise to fans when Emily came back in S12 , she and JJ's friendship was seemingly erased. The two women were rarely on screen together in the late seasons, plus the writers saw fit to even give Emily not only one (Mark in London, but two, on-screen boyfriends for the first time in the entire series. I personally do not think these changes to Emily's character were coincidence, I saw the hellscape of what people would say to AJ and Paget online and I fully believe that upon Paget's return to the show, the showrunners purposely tried to distance JJ and Emily to dissuade the more abusive side of the fanbase.

Can I prove that, no. But it is the only reason I can think of as to why Emily S12+ seemingly didn't care about JJ anymore, despite their deep and meaningful friendship. I mean, they both CROSSED THE WORLD to go rescue each other in prior canon -- but when Emily comes back, they acted like they barely knew each other. This was even more prevalent in S16, when JJ's main storylines all revolved around Will, and Emily barely looked at JJ in the entirety of ten episodes. (Remember how Prentiss didn't even hug JJ after bomb, but she did go hug Luke?)

So, do Paget and AJ earnestly ship Jemily, or are they continuing the long tradition of queerbaiting us? Who fucking knows, not me. But based on the history of this fandom, I think I can make a safe bet. (Interestingly, if you search all of Paget's twitter for the word 'Jemily' [10] she only has 3 direct tweets mentioning the ship. I don't think it's a coincidence that two are within the past few months since they started filming S17 (the other one was a RT of Kirsten (who tagged something Jemily)

This is all to say --

Just because Paget and AJ have publicly talked about Jemily,, this doesn't mean it's ever going to happen on screen. And you know what, THAT'S OKAY!! There has been this constant outcry (after Tara became queer confirmed) of 'Do Emily next' or 'Why wasn't it Emily with a girlfriend!?' and 'Jemily needs to be canon in S17!' -- as if people believe their ships aren't worth anything unless they are canon.

That couldn't be further from the truth! Fandom is built on headcanons and fan interpretations and rare pairs and all types of shippers. Your ship does NOT need to be canon for you to enjoy it. I will ship Jemily forever, no matter what. I don't think there will be some magical queer plot in S17, at best, we might actually get to see Emily/JJ on screen together again and after the train wreck that was S16 -- I'll take whatever I can get.

And hey -- if I am completely wrong, if Erica Messer pulls a Korrasami out of her hat, I will be ecstatic. I will be happy to be proved wrong, but at the same time, I'm not going to lose sleep over it and I'm DEFINITELY not going to go hound the actors about it on social media.

Sources:

[1] 2022 Digital Spy article about the importance of Tara's coming out

[2] 04/18/24 Paget Tweet

[3] 2017 Queerbaiting article from medium.com

[4] 2009 Broken TVGuide link

[4.a] Tumblr quote from the above TVGuide Interview

[5] 2010 Kirsten interview screenrant.com

[6] 2019 AJ Instagram Post

[7] 2020 Paget video on Twitter (via @karasluthqr)

[8] 2015 Kirsten interview AfterEllen.com

[9] 2016 Paget Interview CriminalMindsFans.com

[10] @PagetPaget search 'Jemily'

#criminal minds #emily prentiss #jennifer jareau #paget brewster #aj cook #cm commentary #queerbaiting #cm meta #criminal minds evolution #cm evolution #my writing #long post

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the-possum-writes · 11 months

Text

Save a horse, ride a cowboy

❥Character: Patrick O'Hara (Web Slinger)

❥Fandom: Spiderverse

❥Tags: NSFW, gen!neutral reader, unspecified g*nitalia, PWP, sweetheart as a pet name

❥Synopsis: Imagine being new to the spider society and after meeting Web Slinger you're immediately smitten and whisper to yourself. "Uff, I wouldn't mind riding that cowboy to save a horse." And next thing you know he's got you cornered and say. "I heard you like saving horses."

❥A/n: I would've liked to write relationship hcs first but I would need to investigate more, so enjoy this P/with plot. 🤠

Never in your wildest dreams would you have imagined riding a spider horse beside a cowboy in a society of spider people, as if being bitten by a radioactive spider wasn't bizarre enough. The trip on his horse Widow is undoubtedly bumpy, but after talking with Web Slinger, he's been nothing but charismatic and charming, so when he offered you a ride, you were quick to accept, especially now that you're able to wrap your arms around this athletic build.

"First time riding a horse?" You tighten your grip on Web Slinger's strong midsection as his horse suddenly turns sharply to race on the underside of a staircase. If you played your cards well, your hands might "accidentally" slide a few times simply to run them over his abdomen.

"No, but in my world, horses don't exactly gallop across the ceilings." You cough and chuckle, trying not to look down as the blood rushes to your head from being upside down.

"It's just like any other horse. Though, you're going to have to grab on tighter for this part." even though his tone is stern, you get the impression he's smiling under his bandana as Widow dashed through plenty passageways. Web Slinger climbs off first and helps you down after noting how unsteady you are after the trip after a few dizzying jumps later Widow comes to a rest as you quickly reach at the location where you file for one of those multidimensional gadgets.

"How are you feeling, partner? Widow was just trying to show off; we don't typically provide joyrides." Widow neighs with a contented breath as Web Slinger apologizes.

"I'm fine; I just need a minute or two." Even though you feel as though the world is spinning, you can't really complain because you got to share body heat with this charming guy. Web Slinger may come off as stern and unwelcome at first, but he has been an absolute gentleman. He may make fun of you occasionally, but how can you be mad when it results in a hug?

"How about you take a breather while I fetch you some water, I won't take long!" and with that he pulls out one of his guns and web swings himself to the nearest vending machine.

Leaning against Widow, you take a moment to calm yourself down. You briefly close your eyes to gather your thoughts before Widow's mane hairs begin to tickle your nose. "Heh, you're really quite something, aren't ya girl? You stroke beneath her head and hear her let out a breath, "You're lucky to be his partner, I know I'd love to spend more time with him. Between you and me, I'd definitely ride that cowboy to save a horse," you chuckle softly to yourself, realizing how ridiculous you must look chatting raunchy topics with a horse. Web Slinger returns with a bottle of water, which he throws to you as you catch it with one hand, and you immediately stop talking.

He inquires, "Are you feeling any better?"

"Definitely, after talking to your buddy here, it helped." You lightly pat Widow's side.

"Oh? Is that true? Web Slinger briefly held Widow's head in his hands as if speaking to her, and from the sound of his voice and the way his eye mask moved, it appears like he is interested in what is being said. Which you hoped wasn't a thing.

You make a joke, "Yeah... she's very talkative."

He played along, saying, "Huh, good things about me I hope."

You didn't like the way his voice changed since it seemed like he was on to you, but you had no way of knowing, so you instantly changed the subject. "Anyway! I should get moving so Miguel doesn't come up and chastise me for not wearing a bracelet, hah! By the way, thanks a lot."

"No problem, you know how to reach me if you need help with anything else." As Widow begins a quick gallop, Web Slinger taps his bracelet and tilts his hat to say goodbye before you turn around and go your own ways. However, the manner he is holding the reins behind you causes him to stop moving, and Widow stopped moving when she felt what her rider was thinking.

You anticipated that it would be some time before you saw Web Slinger again, but to your surprise, he came looking for you right after you received your new, sparkly bracelet. In fact, you were tinkering with it when he arrived. He approached you from behind, coming up to you on foot, saying, "Looking quite fancy."

"Thanks Spider "Byte said it should help with the glitching and traveling," you say as you turn around to face him. "Speaking of which, where's that partner of yours?" you ask, referring to the horse.

"Widow is at the cafeteria, she loves the empanadas there, in fact you should try them sometime." Web Slinger mentions with a small laugh before pausing briefly. "But also, she wanted to give me some privacy so we could talk."

"And what do you wanna talk about that not even your horse isn't here? You two seem inseparable." you ask of him, but while you kept questioning it inside your head you didn't notice how there was less and less people around you two.

"Well you're right on that, you see, we were both bitten by the same spider so we have this mental link I call Rider sense," while the man gave his explanation you two turn the corner in a secluded hallway. "And let's just say a little spider told me you have a thing for 'saving horses~" he purposely blocked your left side with a single arm, leaning closer for dramatic effect. Back in your universe you recognize it as a kabedon.

The realization became apparent in your expression, even if you were wearing a mask or not. But there's advantages to being cornered, especially for a spider. "What can I say? I'm quite the animal activist." you lower your voice a bit, drawing him close enough to walk you fingers up his chest.

___

Riding a cowboy can't compare to riding a horse, but they sure are similar enough. The wooden headboard cracks under the pressure of your grip as you hold onto dear life, you're lucky Web Slinger took you to a secluded cabin in his universe cause it's imposible to contain the unholy noises coming from you when bouncying on the mighty steed that is Patrick O'Hara's cock.

"Slingeeer...! Fuck..." you lower your hands to his bare chest, your fingertip twitching on the few hairs scattered over his pectorals.

"Patrick, the names Patrick." he tells you with a strangled grunt. Web Slinger's is currently laying on his back as you ride him senseless, even if that spider bite gave you inhuman strength this man still has your legs cramping as you keep up with his own speed, he helps you by firmly holding your hips with his bare hands like the leather straps on Widow's harness but instead it's to keep you steady as the friction between your joined sexes becomes slippery and heated. Normally you'd hold on for longer but there's something about the angle of his raw cock inside you, the smell of sweat and the insinuating creaking of the bed that has you coming close all over this cowboy.

"God, you're so tight-" Web Slinger struggles to regulate his rhythm as he reaches his end as you milk his needy cock. He immediately sits up to wrap his tan arms around you, ramming inside you desperately as he chases his own high.

"...Patrick... PATRICK!" the edge of your climax catches up to you and doesn't let you string out anything that isn't helpless whining.

You didn't think his voice could get any hotter due to that old timey accent but you're proven wrong when he comes inside you with an array of deep growls and breathy sighs, hearing your name in between a few whispers. "That's it, so good for me, fuck, FUCK." even though he stayed still for a while Patrick still held a nice hold on you, bringing you down with him as he collapses back into the worn out mattress and tangled sheets.

"So... what you think sweetheart?" Patrick asks , propping himself on an elbow as he gives you a lazy smile.

"Wow, just wow." you exasperate. "I mean.. It's been a while since I had this much fun during a joyride." you attempt to comb your sweaty hair only to find Patrick's hat on your head, tossing it away with a laugh as you forgot you were wearing that thing.

"Expect nothing less with me sweetheart," he traces his fingertips over the side of your body, enjoying the afterglow.

#Patrick O'Hara x reader #patrick o'hara #Spiderverse #web slinger #spiderman beyond the spiderverse #webslinger x reader

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yuri-is-online · 17 days

Note

TD anon here, I do feel you on the "torture" scene with Taiga, I didn't want my last ask getting any longer lmao.

While the scene definitely made me squeal, for me personally it was undercut by the emotionally charged scene that happened immediately after with Romeo lmao. It's exactly how I felt with Frostheim too, being excited over the dance with Jin, and then immediately after we get the cigarette kiss scene with Jin and Tohma LOL. But it only makes sense, MC has only just showed up at the school, not enough time to bond, and honestly with these kinds of joseimuke games I don't have much expectations of interactions between the cast and MC so in TD she's already much more involved with the whole comic thing anyways.

Eating the Like Dove raw... was really a raw scene lol. He seems to be attracted to blood for some reason? Since he paused when MC's cut started bleeding, I think he was about to lick the blood tbh.

And yeah I do wonder if his shoddy memory has anything to do with his deal's cost. Another vibe theory time, I feel like his fear of the Like Dove might've been... ingrained in him somehow? Maybe he had a run-in before but can't remember it. The reason why I think this is because when MC met him alone, when she reminded him that she was the Honor student, his response was "Oh no wonder I didn't kill you on the spot", he literally forgot about her but his body/instinct made him aware she's someone he's not supposed to kill.... if that makes sense?

He feels like an even bigger enigma than Towa, I'm curious to know what's going on in his head in the moments he goes eerily quiet. Not to mention he's the poster boy of the game, has to be a reason. Luca feels more in line to be the poster boy but it's Taiga...

I enjoyed Haru's drunk spiel about how helpful MC is lol. Also my eyes going wide when Rui said he wants to know what she's made of too... what does that mean....... I need more Rui content, I love his blatant flirtations lol. I got a campus event with Rui, Haru and Romeo in the bar before I even read the chapter, their unexpected friendship is very cute ngl.

(sorry in case this is sent repeatedly, smth wrong with my net atm)

Generally speaking I have found tumblr doesn't post or send things twice but it sure as hell reblogs them with the same tags 42 times making me look like some sort of freak

for me personally it was undercut by the emotionally charged scene that happened immediately after

Yeah I get this. The cigarette kiss with Tohma and Jin took me off guard, but that was mostly because I thought this was an otome game? Come to think of it I don't think we've had confirmation of the whole joseimuke v otome game thing beyond the existence of the like dove and individual character affinity... Well and that when this was announced it was supposed to be an otome game. I know that the otome games subreddit has been having some, shall we say spirited? Discussions lately about how players feel about ros getting into relationships with each other. The general opinion was that a lot of times the ro x ro relationships feel more fleshed out that the ro x mc ones, and I agree. I actually stopped writing something I wanted to be an otome game because the story started shaping up to be more about the mc's mentor than them, and I personally do not think that is very fun. People do like laid back mcs, they do not like mcs who have no place in the narrative, and some writers aren't good at balancing that. TDB mc is doing pretty well when it comes to interactions with the main cast compared to something like Twisted Wonderland if what you want is explicit romance, so far it feels like Season 1 of og Obey Me! from what I remember of that game, so we'll see.

I didn't get the same level of intimacy from Romeo and Taiga as I did Jin and Tohma? But I think that's because in both cases I thought the like dove had appeared before Romeo got there and was talking to Taiga and the second scene made me think Taiga was angry at him for interrupting his "fun." Whatever that "fun" was going to wind up being because yeeeeeah he seems like he has a blood kink of some sort. I think he was going to suck on it and bite her a bit, but licking seems like a logical first step and less influenced by what's wrong with me. Like I said over here the scene with the Like Dove fascinates me... it says more about Taiga than any other character in the game that we get to see the dove twice and that when given the chance he shoots and eats it... if that isn't a metaphor for denial and emotional repression then I am not sure what is.

he literally forgot about her but his body/instinct made him aware she's someone he's not supposed to kill…. if that makes sense?

YES. I wanted to talk about this but it sort of got into conspiracy theory territory and my answer was getting long. I don't know if anyone remembers, but waaaay back in Book 1 when mc tries to escape the school she isn't able to get anyone's attention. It's like they don't see her, is that because of her curse or is it because of preventative measures put in place by the school? I want to lean towards the latter because it makes more sense BUT I also want to be delusional and say that it's part of mc's curse. There's something about Taiga's instinctual fear of the Like Dove and his comments to the mc that make me think his body knows her but his paranoia and memory issues keep him from knowing it.

This is just me writing fan fic... but Taiga is technically the first ghoul you meet. He is the poster boy of the game, he is the first person to bring mc into the main loop and tell her there's a spy. I want so badly for him to have known her at some point but to have been robbed of his memories... Romeo seems to think he is trying to forget stuff on purpose "gone off the deep end" and "escape reality" are both things he says to describe him though granted that last one was due to a misunderstanding about what Taiga was trying to do with the anomaly. Something real bad happened last year, something I feel like Taiga doesn't want to acknowledge unless he can get revenge on whoever caused it. I mentioned in another post, but I sort of want MC to have something to do with Clementia and that's why she's there at the dorm beyond it just being empty due to the clash. (I do get why Luca isn't the poster boy; he's not a dorm captain and those seem to be what the game wants to push. well them and towa lol)

Haru and Rui

Rui is a bar tender who is described as being "popular with the female students" probably because of how flirty he is ha. I love his dynamic with Haru and Romeo, just a barman and his two favorite customers shooting the shit and trying to relax. Rui is cursed to kill whoever he touches, so I think he wants to talk with MC more because he can relate to her in a very unique way. And he got gate kept from doing so by Haku in book one so he's extra curious now. I have his SR so I'll put him on my homescreen for a bit and see what voice lines I can shake out of him. For the little bit I did have him there he called him and mc "curse twins" which I thought was very cute. In a dark sort of way. The entire section at the Obscuary bar endeared me to all three of those idiots.

But especially Haru. He called Peekaboo his child this chapter too ;-; he's such a good dad. I wonder if he is going to show up next books at all? Or if it's going to be like the previous books and we'll instead see Taiga and maaaaybe Towa? Since he's friends with Zenji. Nothing to do but wait for May 0-0

#<3 asks #tokyo debunker #td anon #hotarubi anon??? art thou the same?#taiga hoshibami #tdb #rui mizuki #haru sagara

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kalmiaphlox · 9 days

Text

Crash Landing

AO3 Link / Masterlist

Astarion has never been a bat before. He's never wanted to be a bat before, but a little sneeze is all it took for him to be stuck as a disgusting rodent.

Wait- He can fly!

But maybe flying isn't all it's cracked up to be...

Main Tags: Batstarion, FLUFF!, Dadstarion, Established Relationship

Waking up next to Astarion is a new experience every time, and this morning is no exception.

The moment she opens her eyes with a yawn, his head looms above hers, ruby eyes boring holes into her face as if she might dissolve into nothing if he looked away for even a moment.

“Any particular reason for being a weirdo this early?” Kalmia asks while placing a hand over his eyes, but he leans forward to nip at her fingers instead and once she pulls away, Astarion bares his teeth. “Ah, so no reason.”

“Do I need a reason when I'm with you, little wyrm?” He holds her wrist and presses a chaste kiss to her lips. “I just want to see every side of you, even when you snore louder than a dragon… Oh, wait…!”

She pinches his nose. “Awe, the vampire has learned comedy this morning. How fun.”

“I'll show you fu-” Astarion rears back, blinking in bewilderment. His nose scrunches up, sniffling before sneezing - violently.

She didn't even know vampires could sneeze.

Gone is the dastardly man with the killer good looks though. Just… gone from her sight. Kalmia sits up swiftly and an alarmed squeak brings her eyes down to the emerald green duvet. A fluffy white bat with overly large ears and a short, pink snout stares up at her with confused red eyes.

Well, isn't this something?

“My, oh my, irthiski, seems I'm not the only shape changer around.” She rubs at his fuzzy head with a finger, and in typical Astarion-fashion, he bares teensy fangs that shimmer like pearls. “What a cutie pie! I could eat you right up!”

That raises another squeak from him, though she can hear the rage burning behind it. How mighty it is, but a dragon does not cower from such things.

“You should be able to speak normally, come on, use your words.” Kalmia nudges him a bit too hard, knocking him over on the sheets. “Oops, sorry!”

There's little grumbling noises that sound suspiciously like speaking, he must be getting a grasp of this new body, it'll take time. Astarion is wobbling around best he can, using his wings as crutches to stand up, the little hook at the end catching on the bedding so he gets stuck, letting out more angry squeaks.

Oh gods, her heart might explode from the cuteness.

“I'm going to pick you up, can't have you tearing all the bedding.” Gingerly, Kalmia wraps her hand around his fuzzy body, picking him up and offering her other hand as support beneath his legs.

The grunting finally becomes audible, “You- What have you…” His lungs aren't at their usual capacity, a full sentence is a struggle. “What have you done, you witch?!”

“Oh, I turn you into a cat once and now it's my fault?”

“What in the…" He gasps, "hells am I?” His small head is angling around to get a look at himself, but she'll do him one better.

The Truesight mirror, its shiny reflection and lacquered wood encasing reveals all.

They stand now in front of it, holding her hands out so Astarion can gaze upon his visage - his favorite activity, but definitely not hers. “You're a bat, irthiski. I've heard vampires can do this sometimes, but maybe you're a late bloomer.”

“Late bloomer-!” He erupts into more enraged squeaks and growls, almost completely falling off her hand before his grabby feet latch onto her finger on instinct, dangling precariously upside down. “A damned bat! I don't want to be this! Where's my beautiful body?!”

Ignoring his dramatics and pressing a smooch to his head, she smiles widely. “I know someone who would be very excited to see this sight.” And they depart from their room, striding into Izmezine's where the girl is just waking up. “Good morning, anon ! Who do you think this is?”

Izzy sits up, blinking her bleary eyes and rubbing them with a big yawn, before scrunching her button nose to inspect the white ball of fluff in Kalmia's hands. Her lips form into a frown, turning her head away in disgust. “It's ugly.”

That was not the reaction I anticipated.

The wail of anguish that leaves his tiny bat body is very impressive, if not over-reactive. Setting Astarion down on the bed, Izzy pulls away slightly, what a terrible start but Kalmia will fix this. “Izmezine, sweetie, please, this is your father. He's turned into a bat by accident. Let's be nice.”

That gets Izzy to take a peek again, and she looks to Kalmia for confirmation. “T-Th-That’s my papa?”

“Yes.”

Poor Astarion is trembling against the bed, the words of his daughter like a stake straight through his heart, but at least he's stopped crying. Izzy reaches forward hesitantly, brushing a finger against his fur and she gasps, “He's s-soft!” She goes back in for a more gentle pet, “W-Why is papa a-a baby?”

Finally finding his words again, Astarion speaks up, “I don't know, I just turned into a bat, but kitten, you think I'm ugly ?” That last word barely makes it out as a squeak. Gods, he's going to be hung up on that for ages.

Izzy scrutinizes him further, golden eyes narrowing and appraising the bat before her. “Uhm, a l-little ugly?” Kids are always so blunt, Astarion should feel lucky that Izzy has enough sense to walk her statement back. The gold eyes turn up to her now, “Kalli, I'm hungry.”

“Me too, let's go have breakfast. What would you like?” Kalmia scoops up the whinging bat and places him on her shoulder, then holds Izzy against her hip.

“Cake!” Is Izzy's first breakfast suggestion.

“Normally I'd agree, but a cake takes a long time to make, how about we make one later and we can have some scones and jam now?”

The dhampir thankfully concedes to that idea and they settle in for an easy breakfast while bat-Astarion clumsily scrabbles along the counter, whining, “I'm hungry too, you know.”

Seems Kalmia isn't the only one that becomes ravenous when changed. “I'll get you food in a bit. Let me take care of my anon first.”

He collapses into a sad pile, crying endlessly, “My daughter thinks I'm ugly, my lizard is starving me. Where is the love?!”

Kalmia slathers some jam onto a scone, ignoring him, “Izzy, what would you like to do today?”

“Can p-papa go in my h-house?” She asks around a mouthful of food.

“Hmm,” Kalmia eyes the worming creature before her, the image of Astarion being stuffed into the doll house is hysterical, but… “I don't think he would like that. Bats are supposed to be able to fly, maybe we can help him learn.”

Both Izzy and Astarion perk up at that, their eyes shining with new possibilities. “You really think I can?” Astarion seems apprehensive at the prospect.

“I don't see why not, irthiski. We can try it out once you get some food.” With breakfast finished, Kalmia takes the bat downstairs, leaving Izzy with the task of gathering pillows and blankets. “What blood do you want?”

“Yours.”

She brings the bat in her hands close to her face, “If you have it now, you can't have it later.”

More grumbling follows, “Fine, get me a glass of the boar.”

Filling a goblet to the top, Kalmia rests them both on their desk. Astarion's little wing hooks grab onto the lip and he shimmies his little body up the length of it, long tongue lapping up the blood. She watches quietly with her head tucked between her hands as a red stain begins to bloom along his snout and neck as he drinks.

“Kalli! The-The blankies and p-pi-pillows are ready!” Izmezine shouts down the stairs.

Astarion pulls away, flopping down to the desk, “I'm full.” The goblet's halfway empty now, she's impressed by his apetite. They return upstairs now after a cleanup, finding the sitting room absolutely covered in blankets and pillows.

Setting her bat on the couch, Kalmia gives Izzy a big kiss on her cheek and squeezes her into a tight hug, “I knew I could count on you to go above and beyond! Wow, look at all this coziness!”

The girl giggles in her arms and Astarion pouts, crossing his wings in a pitiful stance, “What about me? ”

“I didn't forget you, irthiski!” Kalmia showers his tiny head in kisses and Izmezine does the same. He melts at their love. “I don't know how different it is from being a dragon, but my first time flying was… a little wild, you know? I think my mother just threw me off a cliff a few times until I got it. Be thankful for our care, Astarion.”

Izzy nods like she completely understands the lengths they are going to take care of him and he scoffs, “Your mother is a brute.” Kalmia only remembers those days with fondness, he wouldnt understand.

“No! Nafl i-is nice!” Izzy corrects him with a tap to the snout.

“I turn into a rodent and you both gang up against me? Where is the-”

Kalmia interrupts, “Enough. This should come somewhat naturally to you, but we'll start here on the couch and move up in height, ok? Now get to flapping.”

His beady little eyes glare at her and she just smiles sharply back. He's testy, big or small. With a despondent huff, Astarion shuffles along to the edge of the couch, stretching his leathery wings and shaking them out.

The first few attempts end with an immediate face plant to the ground, and while he may not admit it, Astarion is very thankful for the pillows now. The fifth attempt though? His wings find the right rhythm and angle, so he glides down to the end of their makeshift protections. More tries are made, his gliding and flapping now consistent.

Kalmia and Izzy erupt into applause, and she isn't quite sure if she imagines the blush on those little bat cheeks. “Higher now, Astarion?”

“Yes, yes!” He's glowing with pride at his newfound capabilities. Raising him up to the fireplace ledge, he huddles on the ledge peering down to the blanket laden ground. “Alright, I can do this.”

Izzy cheers from the sidelines, “Papa can f-fly!”

With one step, Astarion dives over the edge, flapping vigorously to maintain his height, and it sticks. He's flitting about excitedly, if not a little haphazardly, cackling gleefully. Kalmia, while very happy for Astarion, is concerned he's being too reckless. “ Irthiski, you should slow down and watch where you're going!”

His head whips to her, “Never! Nothing can sto-!” and he smashes head first into a wall, crumbling to a heap of bat limbs on the floor. Izzy shrieks, running over to his still form.

The downside to an undead partner? Can't really tell what kind of damage they've sustained because they don't breath or exhibit any of the normal symptoms.

Astarion is probably fine though.

I hope.

“Don't worry, Izzy, your father will be ok. He'll just need to… sleep that off.” Kalmia strokes the girl's head, whose eyes are welling with large tears. “We should find him somewhere to rest.” She is concerned that he's not changing back… but vampires don't die that easily, no matter how small they are.

Izzy zips downstairs and returns with two doll-sized beds, laying them down by the fireplace with extra bedding so it's very cozy. Kalmia assists in putting his bat-self onto the bed and covering him with blankets. “Kalli, m-ma-make a f-fire! Papa’s c-cold!” Stacking some logs, Kalmia breathes fire onto them, stoking the flames until the room is toasty. With a sniffle, Izzy lays out next to her father and rests her hand on him, “I take c-care of papa.”

“I know you will. You watch over him so I can get lunch started, ok? We can eat here.” Kalmia kisses her forehead before setting off to the kitchen.

It's always an adventure with them.

++++

Over an hour later, Izzy has fallen asleep looking after Astarion's limp body, which hasn't even twitched all this time.

Maybe it's time to take matters into her own hands.

Or fingers.

Pricking the tip of her index finger, Kalmia places it up against Astarion's bat snout, hoping the pooling blood will work like vampire smelling salts.

And of course it does, she should have thought of this earlier.

His snout wiggles side to side, seeking out the delicious scent before him, and begins licking at the drop the moment he makes contact. Red eyes blink open, looking haggard, “What- What happened?”

Kalmia picks up her sad bat, cradling him in her arms, “You crashed into the wall going much too fast. Izmezine took very good care of you, so you should thank her once she's up.”

“How do I change back? If I spend another moment like this, I'm going to become quite cross with-”

“Hush, you're always angry. I normally just think about being me, so maybe try that?”

Astarion goes silent for a while, so he must be trying anything to be himself again. Nothing happens though and he grumbles unhappily, “This is stupid. I don't want to be stuck as a flying rodent for the rest of my life. How will Izmezine be able to introduce me to people? ‘ Oh, come meet my father! The bat? Yes, that's him!’ Kalmia, I can't stay like this!”

“Shall I tickle your nose? A sneeze seemed to set it off the first time.”

His bat face goes through a range of emotions, before settling on sadness, “This is so unbecoming, but fine. Do it.”

Kalmia locates a feather pretty quickly, Gale has quills laying out everywhere, and lightly shuffles the tip across Astarion's nose. His nose wrinkles but nothing happens, and he folds in on himself in defeat.

“I'm sorry, irthiski. We'll figure something out.” She does feel terribly for him, nothing is worse than being stuck in a form at the wrong time. She knows it well.

“Mmm, papa?” Izzy’s sleep laden voice pulls their attention as she starts grabbing at the doll beds, but realizes nothing is there, so she shoots up, alarmed. “Papa?! Wh-Where are y-you?”

“I have him, anon, it's ok.”

Crawling over, Izzy pets her father, also seeming sad that he's still stuck like this. Who's going to read the bedtime story for them?

But if Astarion continues to be a bat, might as well take advantage of this opportunity. “You know, Izzy, I think he's kind of dirty. We should bathe him.”

The girl's eyes light up, “Yes!”

“What?! What do you think-” Astarion begins to shout.

Kalmia presses a finger against his snout. “You've been outvoted. Accept your fate.”

He whines and complains all the way downstairs, and once the bath is filled a few inches deep, she settles the little bat in. Izzy gets to work swiftly, wetting his fur and carefully working in the shampoo. Kalmia assists from the sidelines, but Izzy has it handled.

Astarion's taking this with as much grace as possible, letting Izmezine do as she pleases, because there is never a world in which he would deny her.

But this time must come to an end, it seems.

He makes a strange noise, like a sharp intake of breath, and sneezes, splashing water everywhere when a vampire reappears where a bat once sat.

His resting clothes are soaked and Astarion is absolutely covered in soap, hair flattened against his head as he sneers at the two of them. ‘You two have had a lot of fun today. I think daddy needs some payback.” Izzy and Kalmia both shriek with laughter as they attempt to run, but Astarion grabs them both, dragging them into the tub, turning the water on. “If I had to suffer, then so should you!”

Once they're all soaking wet and giggling, they climb out of the bathtub, drying off, Kalmia has a new idea. “Ready to make a cake, Izzy?”

The girl jumps up and down in excitement, “I w-want pink frosting!”

“Any requests, irthiski?”

He runs a towel over Izzy's curls, “One of Gale's nice bottles of wine. I'm just… going to lie down, my body hurts.”

Kalmia laughs, “You'll get used to it.”

“Ugh, I sure hope not. If I never turn into a rodent again, it will still be too soon.”

++++

Notes:-anon = flower (draconic) -nafl (short for nafldask) = grandmother (draconic)

#astarion #bg3 #dadstarion #fanfic #ao3 fanfic #astarion fanfic #baldur's gate 3 #astarion fic #ao3 #astarion ancunin #batstarion

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oh-goddess-of-chaos · 1 year

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hi can you make headcanons about yandere klaus mikaelson courting his lady love

⠀ 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐇𝐀𝐓𝐄 – 𝐲𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐞!𝐤𝐥𝐚𝐮𝐬 𝐦𝐢𝐤𝐚𝐞𝐥𝐬𝐨𝐧 𝒙 𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐬 ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ✧‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ (navi. & masterlist. & tag. )

「 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 」 klaus spoiling you, just fluff and cute themes, general yandere themes such as stalking, manipulation, threats, forced marriage, etc.

「 𝐞𝐝𝐞𝐧'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞 .⁺ ˖ ⌒ this one's definitely on the lighter sides in terms of yandere!klaus at the start. i imagine the dynamic to be like him w/ caroline if she'd liked him in the first place.

Klaus was at an art exhibit. He himself had taken up painting long ago as somewhat of a hobby, though when he attended, he didn't expect to find anything particularly life-changing. Or, more specifically, anyone. He was simply there to catch a glance at his paintings which had been hung amongst the numerous others.

And there you were, staring, entranced by a painting when he first witnessed your perfect self. There was just something about your expression that drew Klaus in - made him want to know more. And you, being so enamoured with the artistry before you, didn't even notice the vampire slyly sneak up behind you.

It was not just any painting you were staring at. Quite ironically, you were staring at his. Though he couldn't tell for the life of him why you seemed so enraptured in the artwork. Of course, people had stopped by to admire his work, but you didn't move on to look at others. You just stood there, observing it, a slight furrow in your brow.

When Klaus approached you, you jumped. You didn't think someone would take it upon themselves to start a conversation with you - you didn't find anything about yourself particularly alluring. Most people left you alone at social events. And Klaus found it adorable.

So, with a thousand years of experience, he wittily begins a conversation with you, later asking what had caught your eye about the painting you were staring at.

You then quite shyly begin to, in some sense, verbally undress Klaus, explaining how you could see the painting as a sort of expression of loneliness and deeply ridden pain, much to Klaus's utter surprise.

He asks you if you paint, to which you reply a little. You do it when you're stressed as it makes you feel as though you're in control.

When the two of you exchange your names and make more conversation, you are quite flustered when you realize that no other than the man before you is the one who painted the artwork in front of the both of you. You frantically apologize, but Klaus just smiles, and you continue to discuss countless unimportant things with him. The chit-chat is pointless, however you find yourself utterly adoring your ability to speak so freely to the man you just met.

When the both of you begin spending time together, your friends (having noticed who you'd been going out with) warn you to stay away from Klaus, but when asked as to why, they fall short of a distinct reason. It is quite tragic indeed that your friends just so happen to be Klaus's enemies, and that he plans to kill one of them (if not all), but, alas, they aren't planning on telling you anything, and if things go his way, they never will.

Klaus is most certainly the type to leave love letters, poems, and other priceless pieces on your doorstep. Every morning, much to your delight, you have the opportunity of reading his neat, cursive writing that declares his unadulterated adoration of you. These declarations fill you with nothing if not warmth.

You begin to hide these gifts, however, when your friends start to become more anxious at the prospect of you growing closer to Klaus. The relationship becomes somewhat of a scandal from there, you promising your friends that you no longer see him in the days, and sweet, tender rendezvous every night.

Klaus loves to tease and mock you (of course, all in good fun). He adores the blush that creeps onto your cheeks when you demand for him to put an end to his incessant cheekiness, but he never truly does.

Klaus promises to you show you the entire world one day. He speaks of his travels and the wonders that he's marvelled at, of the people he's met and the experiences he's had. You can't quite fathom exactly how he's experienced so much in such a short life, but you don't bother asking him, always swept away in his numerous stories.

And what a wonder it is, spending time with Klaus. He's simply the perfect man - always understanding, always kind, always adventurous. Every moment you spent with him is ecstasy.

And Klaus loves you all the same. You were his muse, his one true love. His bedroom was filled to the brim with paintings and drawings of you. No longer was he the power-hungry, desperately lonely man that he once was - not with you. With you, he was everything he could hope to be and more.

But, of course, Klaus is nothing if not slightly obsessive. And, even though he'll never admit it to himself, mere nights spent with you are not enough. So he follows you, makes sure you're safe during the day, admires you from afar. And at night, once you've fallen asleep, he watches your peaceful body, the way you look as if you have no worries in the world. He even occasionally sees into one of your dreams, wherein he either approaches you or finds another version of himself doing that very thing.

Klaus also happens to be quite jealous, scolding you whenever you spend more than an appropriate amount of time conversing with a man. If any flirting were to happen, you'd best believe that you'd never see that man once again in your life.

As time passes, and Klaus grows somewhat unsatisfied with only having you at night, so he begins to spend time with you in the daytime, joining you for walks in the park or inviting you to elegant dinners.

Tired? He won't hesitate to call a taxi for the both of you in moments. Thirsty? The finest of wines will serve you well. Klaus simply cannot miss the chance to spoil you!

But, alas, all good things must come to an end, and it was only a matter of time before Elena eventually caught on to your secret rendezvous and made the executive decision to tell you everything about Klaus. And, by God, were you heartbroken. But it almost made sense. Klaus was so, so perfect. Too perfect. But you never suspected that his one true flaw would be such a deal breaker.

So, in spite of your aching heart, you sever your relationship with Klaus, brushing past major details and simply explaining that you "just weren't feeling it." It breaks you to see him so distraught, but you know what he's done, and you cannot be the person you are while and simultaneously stay with him.

Unfortunately for you, though, Klaus had, over the many months, fallen for you - something he does not take very lightly. So, quite desperately, he bites Elena, promising that he'll give her his blood once you come back to him. And, in spite of your friend's protests, you do as he asks. You cannot risk losing someone so close to you.

When Klaus then proposes to you, and you, of course, accept, you hate to admit that you still find your heart swelling whenever he compliments you, or kisses you sweetly, or even just stares in your direction. As much as your mind was disgusted by the idea of loving Klaus, your heart could not so easily let him go.

As much as you loathe him for what he's done to your friends, as much as you hate him for forcing his love upon you, you love him, too. And perhaps that is what's worst of all - that despite all that he's done, you're still in love with him.

That, while he kisses you ever so fervently on the altar, you can forget all that he's done and imagine a bright future with him.

That, even as he turns you into a creature that feeds on others simply so he can remain with you forever, you find yourself adoring the idea of spending the rest of eternity with him, muttering the phrase "til' death do us apart" as you feed on the blood of an innocent human being.

So, with a thousand years of experience, he wittily begins a conversation with you, later asking what had caught your eye about the painting you were staring at.

He asks you if you paint, to which you reply a little. You do it when you're stressed as it makes you feel as though you're in control.

And what a wonder it is, spending time with Klaus. He's simply the perfect man - always understanding, always kind, always adventurous. Every moment you spent with him is ecstasy.

Tired? He won't hesitate to call a taxi for the both of you in moments. Thirsty? The finest of wines will serve you well. Klaus simply cannot miss the chance to spoil you!

That, while he kisses you ever so fervently on the altar, you can forget all that he's done and imagine a bright future with him.

#klaus mikaelson x reader #klaus mikaelson fanfiction #klaus mikaelson #klaus mikaelson headcannons #yandere klaus mikaelson #yandere klaus #the vampire diaries #klaus mikaelson imagine #dark fic #toxic love #yandere #yandere klaus mikaelson x reader #headcannons #the vampire diaries fanfic #fanfiction #the originals #tvd #yandere tvd #yandere the originals

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ranchthoughts · 9 months

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ephemerality and YOLO in Only Friends, episode 3 update

Sand's You Only Live Once bag is back

Boston's Instagram bio: Life is too short to stick to one thing

Boston saying he doesn't really care what/how Nick defines their relationship to other people

Ray encouraging Sand to go with the flow and not stress about sleeping with him again (despite Sand's rule that he never hooks up with someone more than once unless they are his lover)

And more ephemerality:

Sand hooking up with Ray (supposedly just the one time)

Boston and Nick hooking up a LOT but not defining the relationship in any more specific terms

Sand agreeing to hookup with Ray again, against his better judgement and his rule that he only sleeps with lovers more than once (they haven't defined themselves yet - friends don't struggle to stop kissing, but they aren't lovers, but Sand doesn't sleep with hookups more than once...)

Ray getting a call from Mew and immediately leaving Sand, despite the allowances Sand was making for him

Top hooking up with Boston on a whim, despite the many complications this is going to have

Permanency (many linked to record-keeping through photography and audio/video):

Boston having photos of himself and Top in the photo booth, which Nick finds

Boston having photos/video of Mew and Ray hooking up

Nick recording Boston and Top hooking up

Mew and Top solidifying a relationship - they've been "seeing" each other for 3 months

Sand agreeing to hook up with Ray again - no longer a temporary situation

Lots of stuff about photography, surveillance, and voyeurism too this episode as @lurkingshan and @waitmyturtles pointed out here

I threw more of my thoughts on photography/video/audio on this reblog chain here

I'm also thinking a lot about control and how it relates to these themes:

control, as in the power to decide to throw caution into the wind and live by YOLO principles (who gets affected by lack of caution, who is able to bounce back - the rich kids of the friend squad don't face as many monetary consequences from their decisions, and also as of yet are not thinking about how their actions emotionally harm others)

control, as in the power to dictate what does or doesn't get defined - Mew deciding he didn't want to be Top's boyfriend but to go back to the talking stage, Boston deciding what term his and Nick's relationship will go by (but also not being clear about what it is, leaving Nick in limbo; offering to let Nick say whatever he wants to others while being clear that Boston doesn't think they need definition - this is a Nick failing/fault to need so), Ray telling Sand he just needs to go with the flow and enjoy things

control through sex - Mew withholding sex from Top to see if he sticks around, Boston pushing himself on Top in the shower, Boston showing the photo of Mew and Ray to throw off Top and then hooking up with him

control through deciding who can be with who - Boston presenting Mew as an option for Top, Boston feeling ownership over Top and not wanting others to be with him, Boston showing Top pictures of Mew and Ray together in the hopes of getting them to break up, Boston getting involved with Ray's crush on Mew, Mew encouraging Ray to go after Sand

control through money - Ray offering amounts of money Sand can't refuse to spend time with him

tagging in the ephemerality squad if they have anything to add/any thoughts: @chickenstrangers @lurkingshan @waitmyturtles

@rocketturtle4

#figure I should keep track of when and where this theme pops up episode to episode #and then just sort of... brain dumped other thoughts in there too for good measure #it's not much but you can look at it if you'd like...#ofts #ofts meta #ranch thoughts

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bella-rose29 · 9 months

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Chapter 6 - The Tour

This is gonna be a big one, so buckle in. Also there's a weird perspective change in the middle that I wasn't sure how to do so there's just three dashes (---) instead because that was the best I could come up with, and it didn't feel right to split it into two parts.

I can't promise any updates for the next two weeks because I'll be on holiday and I have no idea how much access I'm gonna have, but I'll try and get the next part out (there's only 2 or 3 more probably) as soon as I can after I get back :)

Please let me know if you wanna be added to or removed from the tag list as well!

Warnings: past trauma (they're actually gonna talk about it now so please be careful my lovelies), implied past rape

Word count: 6.7k (I don't know how this happened)

Series master list here!

Tag list: @kentucky-criedfricken, @hauntedenthusiasttragedy, @kateswone, @historianthesecond, @polli05927, @ell0ra-br3kk3r

This tour was going to be the death of Nikolai, and it had only just started.

While he and Y/N had built up some sort of relationship over the second part of their honeymoon and the following few weeks, the carriage rides were still a little awkward. Neither of them had said anything about when she had kissed him on the cheek that night (which he could swear he still felt sometimes), and now they had to spend every hour of the day for the next few weeks together trying to prove to everybody that they were completely in love. Nikolai wasn't finding it as difficult as he thought he would, but then he'd always been one to fall hard and fast. He knew he was definitely on his way to being hopelessly besotted with her, especially after the coronation. He had no words to describe how beautiful she looked that day, and seeing her in a crown only gave him further proof that she would be perfect as Queen of Ravka. He had probably looked like a lovesick fool that day, staring at her with unmasked awe, but he found that he didn't care. He was mostly trying to figure out how in the name of all the Saints he got so lucky to have her as his wife.

But this carriage ride was awkward.

She'd agreed to sharing a room with Tamar while Nikolai roomed with Tolya (since back at the Grand Palace they were sleeping separately anyway), but the night before Y/N had seen Zoya going into his room. The inn was small, only really large enough to house the touring party, but they'd put Nikolai as far away from everyone else as possible, just in case something happened. Tolya had been busy securing the perimeter when Nikolai had gone to bed, so Zoya had come to chain him in for the night, but neither of them accounted for the fact that she might be seen by Y/N. His wife had gone to bed over thirty minutes ago, so they had assumed that she was asleep.

When she then appeared on the landing after apparently needing a wee, she'd frozen, then disappeared into her room.

Breakfast that morning had been slightly tense, especially since Y/N had refused to meet either Nikolai or Zoya's eyes.

It was obvious that she thought that the two of them had slept together in the more... intimate way, but Nikolai hadn't had the chance to explain that that wasn't the case yet, since they had all been too busy packing and getting ready to go on the road.

So now the two of them were sat in the carriage, tension filling the air, and Nikolai thought that this might be the death of him. He didn't think he could just say "Oh, by the way, Zoya and I aren't having sex, she's just chaining me to my bed every night and sedating me so that the demon that lives inside me doesn't get out and kill anyone."

Yeah he definitely couldn't do it like that.

“Is there something wrong with me?”

The question shocked Nikolai, and he couldn’t help but jump in surprise a little at the sudden loudness in the quiet of the carriage.

“Not at all, darling, why would you think so?”

“Because you ran away on our wedding day, and you ran away that night - which I know we've sort of talked about, but still - and you said that you ‘definitely didn’t want this marriage’, and you haven’t visited me in my chambers the entire time we've been married, but Zoya has visited yours for all of them, including last night which I did see, by the way, which is fine if the rumours are true, but I want to know if there’s something wrong with me. And don’t call me darling, I don’t like it.” She was slightly out of breath when she’d finished, and Nikolai immediately felt horrible for not giving her the reason as to why he’d left her, but he also knew he still wasn't able to tell her the truth, despite how close they had become the last few weeks. His next words were quiet, almost whispered.

“There is nothing wrong with you, at all. I am the one who has something wrong with them. And I’m not... Zoya and I aren’t... they’re just rumours.” He had been looking her in the eye when he said it, hoping that she would see how sincere he was being, but now he turned back to look out the window, contemplating whether to say more or not. They were both quiet for a moment, before Nikolai spoke again.

“The war was... horrible, to put it lightly. The things that people went through, well, I’m sure you know. I don’t think a single person that went through it has come out without some sort of scar. Mine are... they uh...” he took a shallow breath, trying to fight back the memories of being under the control of the Darkling’s creature, to fight back the memories of being powerless. He shut his eyes, squeezed his hands together, bit the inside of his cheek. “What happened to me, in the war, that’s why I left that night by the lake. I know it’s a crappy excuse, but I don’t think... to be honest? I'm scared. I'm scared that if you know the truth you'll leave, and I think I care about you too much now for that," his face went warm at the confession, but he kept going. "I had to leave because something was happening to do with what happened to me in the war, and I was trying to keep you safe. I know, I know, that it’s not nearly enough to make it up to you, and I realise that I hurt you, but it’s the best I can do for now.” He hoped that what he had said was enough, that she would let him further into her heart past the barrier that he had helped create, and when she nodded and said a small “Okay then” he could have jumped for joy.

He deflated slightly when her brows furrowed, scared about what would come next.

“So why did you run away on our wedding day then? Was it the same thing? And is it also why... why you haven’t... you know?” She blushed slightly at the last part, her voice getting smaller as she went on, and Nikolai could guess at what she meant.

“It’s why I haven’t visited you, yes. But our wedding day it was just nerves. Truthfully, I was scared that you had run away, and that was what was taking so long, and I lost my nerve and went and hid in the workshops.” She let out a breathy laugh at that, and Nikolai felt hopeful for the days ahead.

“You really do love building things, huh? Definitely not a very kingly thing to do, running away to go build things.”

“I’ve always loved making things. It’s more of a ‘Nikolai’ thing than a ‘King of Ravka’ thing, like you said, but it’s where I feel at home. There or on-” he cut himself off, not sure if he should reveal that part of himself.

Ah, what the hell. She needed to know something true about him, even if it wasn't about the demon.

“There or on the True Sea. I’m sure you’ve heard the rumours about where I went for those years when nobody could find me.”

Her eyes went wide. "Wait, you're Sturmhond?"

"Yep," altering his voice back to the accent he had used as the privateer. "The one and only, and just as handsome in the flesh." He laughed then, realising something. “I guess I have a habit of running away from things. Although running away from University was because I didn’t think they could teach me anything new or that I couldn’t teach myself, so- Saints, sorry. That probably sounded really arrogant and like I think I’m better than them and I don’t, I just read a lot when I was a child because I like learning, so I-”

“Kolya! It’s fine,” she giggled, and Saints, he thought he’d died and gone to heaven. “I know you didn’t mean it in that way, and honestly you were just digging yourself further and further into a hole there.” All he could do was stare at her, though.

“You called me Kolya.”

“Oh, would you rather I didn't? It just sort of slipped out. I don't have to call you that if you'd rather I didn't?” She was panicking slightly, so Nikolai reassured her, making sure she knew that it was fine to call him by the nickname.

The air between them turned comfortable again, when all of a sudden the carriage went over a dip in the road, jolting them and sending Y/N flying.

Into his lap.

His hands automatically went around her, one on her back, the other gripping her thigh, holding her in place so that she didn't fall, while both of hers landed on his chest. Their faces were so close he could feel her breath against his mouth, and their noses were brushing against each other. She was straddling him, legs on either side of his thighs, and his heart was beating so fast that he could have sworn she would be able to feel it through his jacket.

"Uh... Kolya?"

Saints, he needed to get her off of him.

Luckily she did it herself a second later, levering one of her legs over to the other side so that she was sat next to him. The carriage was small enough that they were squished in sat like that, and her thigh was pressing into his. He was sure his face was burning, and looking at her, she wasn't doing much better. He clenched his hands into fists in his lap, trying to ignore his reaction to having her sat on him.

"You okay? I can move back over if you want?" Y/N's voice was quiet, and as she got up to sit back where she was, he grabbed her wrist. She flinched slightly, eyes wide, and he quickly took it back.

"Sorry, I just... you don't have to move, darling," his voice was lower than he'd hoped, and he could tell that she'd noticed. Damn it. She sat back down, still next to him, and he cleared his throat.

The atmosphere was back to being awkward.

They spent the next ten minutes in silence, glancing at each other then quickly looking away when caught. Nikolai was glad when they came to a stop just outside the next town and he could breathe fresh air. He helped Y/N down, flushing when she put her hand in his. She stumbled slightly on the step, falling into him for the second time that day, and he heard her breath hitch in her throat.

"Alright?" he asked, hand on her waist again. She nodded in response, righting herself. They turned around to see the twins and Zoya watching them, Tamar with an eyebrow raised.

"Come on, lovebirds. Let's get you on the horses."

The aim of the tour was to show off the new Queen to the people, so Nikolai and Y/N would ride horses through the main roads up to the inn they would stay in for that night. It was bringing back memories from when he did the same thing with Alina, and although he had had feelings for her, he knew that what he felt for Y/N was far stronger.

This town was far more inviting than the previous one had been, with people lining the streets, cheering for the newly crowned monarch. Nikolai hadn't had the time to do this for his own coronation, and most people knew about him anyway, but he was pleased to see so many happy that they were there. He looked over at Y/N, smile wide on her face as she greeted people like she'd known them her whole life.

They had barely made it to the market square where they would dismount when a woman came rushing towards them, pushing through the crowd.

"Y/N! Y/N!!"

Her head whipped around, searching for the voice, and when she found it she squealed - actually squealed - practically leaping from her horse, running to the woman (who looked weirdly similar to Y/N) and throwing her arms around her. Nikolai realised with a jolt that she did know these people, and that the woman was her mother (which he'd like to claim as his observation skills, but really it was when she greeted the woman as 'mother'). He climbed off of his own horse, handing the reigns to one of the stable hands and thanking him. Y/N was still embracing her mother when he walked over to them, and they were talking so animatedly he wasn't sure how they were still hugging.

"Ah! Moi Tsar!" Y/N's mother curtsied, which both he and her daughter went to rectify.

"Oh, there's no need. You're Y/N's mother?" he asked, and she nodded in response. "Then family doesn't need to use formalities. And Nikolai, please." He flashed one of his smiles, hoping it would help win her over, but he clearly didn't need to worry as she launched herself at him, flinging her arms around him in a hug. He was surprised momentarily, but quickly recovered, wrapping his arms around her with a chuckle. When she pulled away she introduced herself, then promptly dragged Nikolai and Y/N over to a group of people at the back of the crowd. At the delighted sounds and cheers they gave, he assumed they were more relatives, and when they introduced themselves they confirmed his suspicions. The two of them spent the afternoon with her family, and he found that he was thoroughly enjoying himself, learning lots about her childhood and her family, baby pictures being brought out at some point (much to Y/N's dismay - she tried to wrestle them out of her mother's hands). Dinner was wonderful, cooked by Y/N's mother (who refused to let either of the monarchs help, even though they tried multiple times), and the conversation was easy.

By the time they were collected by Tamar, Nikolai felt far more like himself than he had for months. The last time he had felt this free was when he was Sturmhond, sailing on the Volkvolny.

It was nearly dark now, the sunset casting a glow over the town, and Y/N slid her arm through his, closing her eyes and basking in the warmth.

"I didn't realise this was your hometown. We should come back sometime, visit your family again," he said.

"I'm sure mother would love that, she was practically head over heels you the moment she saw you!"

He laughed, saying "I do have that effect on people, it's truly a blessing having a face as damnably handsome as mine. But don't worry, I won't start anything with your mother." She wrinkled her nose, then pretended to gag, and Nikolai laughed even harder.

"Saints, I did not enjoy the image that just came into my head, ugh." Y/N shuddered, clearly completely grossed out.

"We're here, let's get inside, there's a bed in there with my name on it," Zoya called out, and they followed her through the door of the inn. It was small, but homely, a fire in the front room warming the area and making Nikolai feel cosy here. Room keys were given out, but when Tamar handed Nikolai his, that was the last one. He frowned in confusion, since Y/N hadn't received hers yet.

"What about me?" She was also confused, but Tamar just said:

"You're going to have to share tonight. Don't worry, there's two beds, so you'll be fine." Nikolai stared at her, thinking she'd lost her damn mind.

"Tamar, a word?" He shot Y/N an apologetic look, then herded Tamar, her brother and Zoya into a separate, empty room. "Why are we sharing?" he demanded.

"You'll be fine, Nikolai. We'll give you the stronger sedative, you're in separate beds, and the twins have offered to take turns keeping watch outside your door, so if anything happens, they'll know, and we can hopefully stop it before it gets bad," Zoya explained, a small smile on her face. He couldn't help but feel that they had planned this.

"What? Oh, no, I'm not worried about that, I'm sure it'll be fine. I'm more concerned about the fact that we are sharing a room for the first time in a small room in a small inn!" He got dangerously close to shouting, calming himself down with some deep breaths. The three of them had to know that Nikolai and Y/N had not shared a room at night before, so why was it happening now? And why did it have to happen on the same day as having her in his lap and meeting her entire family?

"Like we said, there's two beds, so it's not like you're going to be sleeping on top of each other. Just calm down, and it will all be fine," Tamar soothed.

It was not all fine.

Tamar had lied.

There was only one bed.

"I'll sleep on the floor, I've slept in worse conditions," he said once he found his voice, both of them stood stupidly in the doorway.

"No, no, no, you take the bed. You forget that I have also slept in worse places than this. I'll sleep on the floor."

"What sort of husband would I be if I let my wife sleep on the floor? No, just give me a pillow and the throw and I'll be fine." He was panicking slightly now; he hadn't accounted for the fact that there might only be one bed, and that put Y/N in far greater danger if the demon came out because it was uncomfortable on the floor.

"Ugh, okay. A compromise. How about we both sleep in the bed?"

"Wh- uh... Are you sure? We haven't... we haven't even shared a room yet," now he was panicking because she had just offered to share the damn bed, and he wasn't sure he would ever get to sleep when the memory of her sat on him, cheeks flushed, came back to him.

"I mean, it's not like we're going to be naked or anything, right? And we're both mature adults, so I'm sure we can make it through one night together. That and we are actually married? Not sure if you remember that, but..." she was teasing him now, easing the tension.

"You know what? I do vaguely remember some sort of ceremony, lots of people, a beautiful girl..." he winked at her, getting braver as he went. He internally cheered when she blushed, scoffing slightly.

"Flirt."

"I don't need to flirt, we're already married, darling."

"You didn't propose, though, so maybe you do need to flirt. Since the whole marriage was arranged?" Was she outright asking him to flirt with her? He didn't mind if she was. Apparently he was getting his charm back when around her, so he wasn't opposed to it at all. She also hadn't told him to stop calling her 'darling' this time, assuming that she actually enjoyed the pet name and pocketing that piece of information away. They spent the next ten minutes getting ready for bed, swapping halfway through to take turns using the small bathroom that joined onto the main bedroom. Nikolai had gone in first, so now he was sat on the edge of the bed (they had picked sides already, although it was more Y/N had picked a side and he'd had to go where she wasn't), vial of sedative in hand. He couldn't decide when to take it, since it knocked him out pretty fast. Should he take it now, and avoid any questions? Or should he wait until she was asleep? His train of thought was interrupted by the sound of the bathroom door opening, Y/N stepping through. She was dressed in her nightclothes, and once again Nikolai found himself thinking about the carriage ride that morning.

"Are you okay? You look... not upset, but not happy," she asked, worry lacing her tone.

"I'm fine," he replied, and Y/N scoffed.

"Yeah, as a woman I can tell you that whenever someone says 'I'm fine' they're not fine. But if you don't want to talk about it I won't pressure you, okay? Similarly I'm here if you do want to," she said, the worry being replaced by something softer. She moved around the room, packing away her clothes from the day and brushing her hair.

"It's a sedative. To help me sleep."

She stopped brushing, turning her head to look at him in confusion. Placing the brush down, she walked back over to the bed, sitting down beside him.

"The thing you're holding? Do you get nightmares?"

"Yes to the first one. Technically yes to the second? But that's not why I take it." He was taking a risk, telling her this, but if today had told him anything it was that he was completely in love with Y/N, and that Zoya was, unfortunately, right, and he would rather the words came from him directly than Y/N found out through rumours, which she clearly hadn't heard since she'd been underground during the war. He would take it slow, reveal the truth in pieces to give her time to process it all.

"Oh. Do you have insomnia or something?"

"I'm possessed by a remnant of one of the Darkling's nichevo'ya and every now and then it wakes up at night to eat something."

So much for taking it slow.

He grimaced, looking over at her face. Her eyes had widened, mouth open slightly, and while he knew it was completely the wrong time he couldn't help but think about what it would be like to kiss her.

"You... what?"

"During the war, the Darkling attacked the Spinning Wheel, have you- you know about it? Alright. It was awful, so many good people died. His nichevo'ya ripped a man apart in front of us. When one of them headed straight for me I thought it would just... kill me." He paused, taking a breath and fighting back the memories of what came next. "I had been wounded, and he sent one of them... into me through the wound? That sounds stupid, actually, but I can't think how else to put it. It took over; I couldn't think for myself, couldn't read, couldn't talk. He'd stripped me of everything I pride myself on." Another pause, another breath.

"You don't have to keep going, if it hurts too much," she whispered, and he was grateful for her calmness to the information that he was possessed.

"No, it's... it's alright. I'm just trying to think about it as little as possible."

"Okay then. So why didn't it just... disappear when the Darkling died? The Fold did."

"Honestly? I'm not entirely sure. We've theorised that because he used merzost to create them, they're outside the laws of nature and therefore outside the law that if he dies, so does his power. But for about three months after the war it was dormant. Something triggered it, woke it up, and now I spend every night wondering if I'll wake up back in that body."

"So the sedative helps? Puts you deep enough under that it stops the demon?"

"Supposedly. Normally there's chains as well, but given we're sharing a bed I think we'll forgo those tonight."

"...Chains?"

"Yeah. That's why Zoya comes to my room, by the way. We're not... she's locking me up for the night to try and stop me escaping, which I think she enjoys a lot more than she should."

"Right."

He took another breath before taking off his gloves.

"Nik..." she gasped slightly at the blackened veins of his hands, reaching out to touch them, but hesitating.

"Even when the demon wasn't awake, I had this. Nothing we tried got rid of it. It won't hurt either of us, if you want to touch," he said, and he could have died a happy man when her fingers brushed his bare ones for the first time since they met. How are they so soft? It didn't make sense, especially given her upbringing in fields and having training sessions in the Little Palace, but he wasn't going to complain. He was feeling her skin for the first time, and he couldn't help but lean into her slightly. They sat like that for a while, her hand tracing over both of his.

"Thank you, Nikolai. That can't have been easy for you. So really, thank you."

"If there's a chance it might wake up and eat you tonight I'd rather you had some idea of what you were up against." She started at that.

"Will it eat me? Like is that a genuine worry I should have? Because I'll get someone else to sleep next to you if I might die, no matter how much I care about you." His heart skipped a beat knowing she cared about him, and he couldn't stop staring at their linked fingers.

"Hopefully not. So far it's satisfied with just livestock, but the twins are taking turns outside the door just in case it comes out so they can get you to safety. Obviously we don't want that to happen, but we've planned for every eventuality. Although I won't lie I didn't know there was only one bed in here. I'm convinced that they did and they're just trying to get us together." She laughed, resting her head on his shoulder.

"Well if you don't chew my arm off in the night, then I'll call that a success and their plan worked."

They spent another few minutes in comfortable silence, laying with each others' fingers.

When she spoke, it took him by surprise.

"I was 13 when I got left. In the dark." She was quiet again after that, for so long that Nikolai thought she'd gone to sleep on his shoulder. "I never usually stayed the night at the Little Palace, but it was somebody's birthday or something, and Zoya said I could share with her, so I did. He - the Darkling - was there, he'd uh... he'd always chosen me and Zoya to go on missions and things, since we were the most powerful, and he said that we'd both done so well on our last one he wanted to give us something as a show of gratitude."

Nikolai was frozen where he sat, mind racing at all the possibilities of what could have happened, and desperately hoped that none of them occurred.

"I went with him, of course I did, he was like an older brother to me, and since I never had someone like that it felt nice. I was tired, though, didn't notice when we left the path and headed into the woods. He-" she broke off, and Nikolai's heart clenched.

"You don't have to keep going, my darling. Not if you don't want to."

"I want to. I trust you." Those six words made his heart swell, and he kept his mouth shut, letting her continue in her own time. She took a shaky breath before speaking again.

"He told me to close my eyes, said he didn't want me seeing the gift too early because it was a surprise. I never noticed him leave. When I opened my eyes because I couldn't hear him anymore, I was alone in a clearing somewhere in the woods. I knew nobody would hear me, but I also knew that I had no idea where I was, and I could get more lost by just running blindly. I tried using my powers to find something to help me, but I was scared, and that made me weaker. Someone came up behind me - I won't say who - and grabbed me, and I was still too scared to do anything. I couldn't even hit him, I was just... lying there, frozen. He uh... he just..." she was blinking back tears, and Nikolai wrapped his arms around her, letting her sob into his chest. Part of him wanted her to say who it was that had hurt her, done such a thing to her, just so that he could hunt him down and kill him, but he understood if she didn't want to. She was already telling him so much. They sat like that for Saints knew how long, her crying into him and his hands stroking her back. At some point she sat up, eyes puffy and red from crying, and Nikolai didn't resist the urge to wipe away her tears.

---

His fingers were gentle, and his eyes were watery and filled with worry and care, which only made Y/N want to cry again. Knowing that the reason he had left her on their wedding night was because he was possibly going to eat her alive allowed her to feel safe enough to trust him with her trauma too, and she felt like she owed it to him to tell him why she'd been so upset about it. Seeing him with her family today had helped, especially since they had all taken an immediate liking to Nikolai, but even her mother had said what a wonderful man he was, and Y/N couldn't help but agree. Her mother had also said that he was probably incredible in bed, at which point Y/N had walked away from the conversation.

Of all the reasons why her husband hadn't had sex with her though, she hadn't expected it to be because he might eat her. Literally.

As he wiped the last of the tears off of her face, she studied him in the candlelight. She knew he was handsome, sure, but she didn't think she'd actually been this close to him before (apart from the carriage ride, but she was trying desperately not to think about that and how good it had felt to be sat on him). He really was gorgeous, golden locks neatly styled on his head, although as she looked she realised a few strands had come loose, resting against his forehead. She brushed them back, pushing them to join the rest of his hair, and his breath caught in his throat.

The mood wasn't right to kiss really, given what had been shared, but Y/N felt lighter knowing that they trusted each other. That the reason he had left was the complete opposite of what she had assumed; even when he'd known her for less than a day, he'd wanted to protect her, not hurt her.

"Kolya?"

"Hmm?"

"Thank you."

"Of course, darling."

He rested his forehead against hers, and she let her eyes fall shut. Their fingers were still linked, and she couldn't help but marvel at them. They were rough, obviously from his time in the army and multiple years at sea, but somehow still soft? Given how much he cared about his appearance, she wouldn't be surprised if he had some sort of special Fabrikator hand cream that made them feel this way.

"What are you thinking about?" It was a murmur, quiet enough that it didn't disturb their peaceful moment.

"You." He pulled his head away slightly, and she opened her eyes, worried that she'd gone too far. But then he had been flirting with her earlier, so surely she could do the same with him?

"Saints, the things you do to me," he breathed out, and she got butterflies in her stomach from how he sounded. Part of her wanted to kiss him, kiss every inch of him head to toe and let him do the same to her, but the other part knew that it hadn't been that long since she'd dredged up the memories of what had happened, and to do anything now might scare her and close her off again. She really didn't want that, desperate for this relationship to evolve into something more.

"We should get some rest, it's been a long day and tomorrow will be even longer," she managed, and he nodded, retracting his arms from around her. Y/N was disappointed at the loss of his warmth, but when they got under the covers and he pulled her closer, whispering "Is this okay?" into her ear, she decided she didn't want to be anywhere but in his arms.

"This is okay. Do you need to take the sedative?"

"Yeah, probably. Let me move my arm, hang on."

They spent a few moments shuffling about, since in his haste to have her close to him he'd trapped one of his arms under her body. He sat up slightly, and Y/N watched as he tipped the liquid down his throat, placing the vial back on the nightstand and lying back down. She was already mostly asleep, and apparently the sedative didn't take long to kick in, as a few seconds later she felt his breathing even out. The soft rise and fall of his chest lulled her further in to sleep, and she let it claim her.

~~~

The next morning, Y/N woke to the sunlight pouring in through the window, her head resting on something warm. Lifting her head slightly, she realised that she was lying on Nikolai's chest, the warmth of his body seeping through his thin shirt, one of her legs slung over his. His hand was holding her leg, bringing back the memories of the carriage ride, and an arm was wrapped around his waist. Now the warmth she felt was radiating from her face, blushing at the position they were in. Pushing herself up slightly, Y/N studied Nikolai.

He looked peaceful, blond locks in disarray from sleeping. Lifting the hand that had been resting on his chest, she traced the lines of his face, fingertips gentle as she did so. He had freckles, something she hadn't seen before, and she tried to count every one she found. His eyelids fluttered before opening, and Y/N held her breath. Blinking a few times before settling his eyes on her face that was only a few inches from his own, he smiled, whispering "Good morning, darling." His own hand reached up, brushing a few strands of hair behind her ear, lingering there for a few moments.

"Morning, I take it you didn't... you know?"

"No, I didn't. At least I don't think so. I'm pretty sure someone would have put you in a different room if I had, to keep you safe," he replied. Nikolai hadn't taken his eyes off of her since waking up, and his hand was still by her face, thumb stroking her cheek, a soft smile still playing on his lips. Y/N couldn't help it, leaning in closer so that their noses brushed against each other like they did last night. He pushed himself up a little, breath fanning over her face. She closed the gap, gently pressing her lips to his, and his hand cupped her cheek, pulling her further into the kiss. The butterflies that had been building up over the last few weeks exploded, taking flight in her stomach. His lips were soft, melding perfectly to hers as if they were made for each other. They pulled away for breath, eyes lidded as they looked at each other before diving in again. Where the first kiss had been slow and gentle, this second one was deeper, Nikolai wrapping his free arm around Y/N's waist and bringing her closer as she levered herself further on top of his body, straddling his hips. She moaned into his mouth as he deepened the kiss, tilting his head and slipping his tongue in.

They were interrupted by a loud knock on the door, startling them both as they swivelled to look in the direction of the sound.

"Wake up, lovebirds, it's breakfast time. Make sure you're packed up and ready to go afterwards as well," Tamar said, footsteps fading away as she left to go wake up the next room. Y/N turned back to Nikolai, still lying on top of him, and blushed at his own flushed face, eyes dark. His voice was hoarse when he spoke.

"We should probably listen to her, she gets cranky and throws the axes when people don't."

She couldn't help the feeling that grew when she heard him, voice low and rough, and could only nod in response, starting to lift herself off of him.

They spent the next few minutes getting ready, swapping use of the bathroom like the night before to get dressed. Stood in front of the mirror, Y/N tried cooling herself down with cold water, using her abilities to make the water colder. There was a soft tapping on the door, and she opened it to see Nikolai, fully dressed, not a hair out of place.

"You alright?" she asked.

"Hm? Oh yeah, yes. I just..." he was holding his gloves, fiddling with them but not putting them on. He looked uncertain, nervous, and Y/N couldn't help but think how strange it was, given how confident he usually was. "That wasn't a one-time thing, right?" The question surprised her, and she quickly shook her head.

"No! Uh, I mean, if... I'd like it to happen again," she trailed off, not looking him in the eye. He stopped fussing with the gloves, one of his hands coming up to tilt her chin upwards as he leaned in to place a chaste kiss on her lips. She chased after him as he pulled away, already missing him, and he smiled, a small one that somehow she knew was reserved just for her.

"Alright then. Are you ready? We should probably head down soon."

"Yeah, I'm ready."

She slipped her arm through his, and he put his gloves on, covering up the black veins of his hands. Nikolai opened the door just as Tamar raised her hand to knock, her expression changing from angry to surprised.

"You took your time, we've been up for ages. Come on, I'm starving."

Breakfast was taken in the small food hall of the inn, and Y/N didn't leave Nikolai's side the whole time, keeping one hand in his. Zoya noticed, shooting a questioning look, but Y/N refused to answer her at this point in time, hoping the general would leave it for now and pester her later. Nikolai kept pressing small kisses to her temple or the hand that he was holding, making her blush, but she didn't hate the attention he was giving her.

By the time they had finished breakfast and packed up the carriage, Y/N was sure that everybody in the town had made note of the difference in how the married couple were acting, and as she said goodbye to her mother the woman leaned in and said "Make sure you're using protection, sweetheart. Unless you're trying for an heir already!" Y/N choked on air, quickly waving goodbye and promising to come back and visit soon. Getting into the carriage, she was still coughing slightly, and Nikolai looked up, concerned.

"Are you alright? Is something wrong? Do you need me to-"

"Nikolai! I'm okay, I just..." she paused, and his worry only seemed to increase. "My mother thinks we had sex."

"Oh. I mean... she's not far off, is she? Ow!" He clutched his arm where she had (lightly) punched him, and she couldn't help but giggle. Y/N moved next to him, and he automatically shifted so that she could rest her head on his shoulder.

This is nice, she thought as the carriage started moving. This is really nice. Waving goodbye to everyone gathered, she sunk further into Nikolai's body, letting him wrap an arm around her in a hug. The ride passed without incident, although when Tolya came to collect them to get them on the horses he had to tailor them a little to make it less obvious that the two had been making out most of the way there.

That night, Y/N and Nikolai shared the bed again, savouring the slight domesticity and kisses that came with it. They shared the bed the next night, and the one after that as well, sharing kisses and stories of their childhoods before falling asleep in each others' arms.

Chapter 7

#grishaverse #netflix shadow and bone #nikolai lantsov #nikolai lanstov x reader #nikolai x reader #nikolai lanstov x y/n #nikolai x y/n #king of scars

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midnightdevotion · 2 years

Text

Safe

Request: "Who did this to you?"

Pairing: Rooster x Civilian Reader

a/n: I could see this being a three-part series, let me know if you guys want that!

Tag list is open!

Requests are open!

Warnings!!! so there will be talk about past abuse in this, this might be triggering to some people so please please don't read if this will harm you in any way!

You'd been a bartender at the hard deck for about a year now. It's been the best job you've ever had. Most wouldn't dream about being a bartender but you loved the atmosphere. The way people were usually so friendly, and you loved working for Penny.

About three months ago, you met the most breathtaking aviator you'd ever seen. You'd both been dancing around your feelings since.

3 months ago:

It was an especially rowdy night at the hard deck, which isn't necessarily unusual but you did notice a few new faces. You didn't really give it another thought, too busy making drinks to even have a spare thought.

Only when she heard the crowd booing and the bar go weirdly quiet did you allow yourself to look up and register what was going on. First glancing at the jukebox to see that it had been unplugged, you turned your head to the starting notes of a piano.

Your breath hitched as you watched this man perform for the whole crowd. There's a lot of attractive people that come through this bar, and a fair amount of them try to flirt with you but you have never seen someone glow like him.

You were totally enraptured in his performance for the entire duration. Penny of course picked up on this. "Someone's got heart eyes for Bradshaw huh?" she was grinning cheekily at you when you pulled your eyes away.

Groaning you laugh, "Penny don't start, he's just attractive but you know that these aviators are never here for very long." All she does is look at you with a knowing look.

"y/n I know you are scared after your last relationship, but he's not going to hurt you anymore. You are allowed to move on" You just sigh, remembering his last words to you before you blocked his number. "You're MINE and I'll kill you before anyone else can have you"

Logically you know that the odds of him finding you are slim, you deleted social media, and nobody knows where you moved off to. You're almost thankful the rush comes back bigger after he finishes the song. You lose yourself back into your work, pretending you don't see Penny's looks of concern.

Things finally slow down after an hour of pure chaos and that's when he walks up to the bar.

"excuse me, ma'am, can I grab four beers from you?" you look up to see none other than the gorgeous piano-playing aviator. You see penny go into the back from the corner of your eye.

"sure thing" you give him what you hope is a polite smile that doesn't show your absolute nervousness.

"Are you new around here?" the tanned golden retriever of a man asks

"Uh depends on your definition of new, I moved here about 9 months ago" you explain, really hoping he doesn't try to find out why.

"That explains it" you cock your head at him waiting for him to clarify.

"I just wouldn't ever be able to forget such a beautiful woman. So I had to make sure I didn't miss it four years ago"

He's left you speechless, and you just handed him his 4th beer so why isn't he leaving. He's staring at you with soft eyes and a soft smile before he chuckles.

"Can I get one more thing from you darlin?" you nod, because well it's all you think you can do.

"What's your name?" he asks, eyes sparkling as he watches you borderlines squirm from his gaze.

"It's uh- it's y/n" you try to sound like you aren't affected by this man but clearly that doesn't work at all, and you can only pray the hotness of your cheeks isn't actually visible.

"y/n... beautiful. I'm Rooster by the way." and before you can even register what is happening you can hear your voice

"like the animal?" next thing you know his head is thrown back, and his laugh.. god his laugh is the most beautiful sound.

"That's right darlin just like the animal" he's grinning at you before his attention is being demanded back to the pool tables. He looks almost forlorn as he turns back to you.

"That's my cue, unfortunately, I hope I get to see you again soon y/n" he sighs as he grabs the beers and heads back to the pool tables.

____

Present:

It turns out those aviators that you thought would be gone quicker than you could blink are staying. Most of them are looking to buy houses and find a permanent residence off of the base.

Rooster is one of those pilots.

It's another Friday night at the hard deck and these make for especially busy nights. You watch as the people you've come to call friends walk in. Though you try not to dwell on the fact that caring about people here scares the living hell out of you.

Rooster is grinning the second he sees you, beelining it directly for the bar. "ah my favorite bartender" he lets out a chuckle at your eye roll. "I packed you some food because well I know your bad at that so when you're on break let me know and I'll sit with you"

Your heart is fluttering, and the butterflies are untameable. Of course, he brought you food, last week you had mentioned that you almost always forget to bring food, and you're getting awfully sick of eating bar food multiple times a week.

"You brought me food?" you're looking at him like he hung the moon in the sky for you, and penny would sarcastically note he looks at you the same way.

"Of course sweetheart, can't have you eating any more bar food remember" You know it's not really significant but suddenly things feel too real. Before you can register what you're doing, you're giving a tight-lipped smile and a nod of thanks before darting off to the back.

Penny, the only one who knows your full story is looking over in confusion to see a just as confused Bradley. Penny knew you would need a minute before you were ready to talk, this isn't the first time something has sent you into flight mode.

"Bradshaw sit back down, she needs a minute, when that clock says 7:30 you can go back." Penny fixes him with a firm stare and he feels like his only option is to plant back down on the bar stool. Even though everything inside of him is screaming at him to find you.

It's quite possibly the longest twenty minutes of Bradleys life before Penny gives him the okay to go into the back.

He walks back, shocked at what he sees. You're standing there, top pulled up to show your stomach, but what he doesn't expect is the huge scar.

"y/n... what" his voice is so soft yet it still causes you to jump. You were expecting Penny would send him back, she's been encouraging you to talk to rooster about everything for a while now. Ever since learning of them staying about two months ago. You knew once you shared this though, he might change his mind about you. Even if he doesn't it makes it all feel so much more real, no more keeping him at arm's length.

"I... the reason I came to California was because of my ex. He started out so nice, picture-perfect really... and after a year we decided to move in together. That's when things changed" You still weren't facing him, but you know he could see you in the mirror and if you lifted your head you'd be able to see him too.

"It started small.. he would slap me or just say nasty things to me if I didn't do things right but he slowly got worse. It went from slapping me for breaking a dish to full-blown beatings for some guy who looked at me for a second too long" You can't see his face but you can imagine that his eyes show the same polite sympathy everyone else's does, and god you weren't ready to be pitied by him yet.

"One... one especially bad night he came home drunk.. and well he started beating me for who knows what... I guess my body had been through enough and my small intestine tore. I should be dead really because he beat me till I passed out and then he went and passed out. I'm lucky because my best friend came over that morning and saw me through the window. She called 9-1-1 and they got me into surgery in the nick of time... I was in the hospital for 3 weeks to make sure it wouldn't re-open. I thought I would be able to just stay with Kenzie-- my best friend but he kept calling, and then those turned into him parked outside her place, and then he was leaving threatening notes on my car.. the police weren't any help. So I waited until I watched his car leave at 2 am one morning and I had Kenzie drive me to the airport. I left, and I haven't been in contact with anyone from back home since too scared that he will find me and kill me this time." You didn't notice when the tears started, but you could feel them drip onto your chest.

"darling... can I come closer" You furrow your brow at him asking permission, but nod nonetheless. He's slow with his movements, you'd bet it took him almost a minute to make his way towards you, even though it was maybe twenty feet of space. He moved so he was standing in front of you, effectively blocking your view from the mirror.

"Can i?" you glance up at him to see him looking at your scar, it makes you anxious but you nod anyway. His feather-light touch traces your scar. "Who did this to you?"

"Bradley no.. you can't go after him. He will know where I am then and I will have to move and if he finds me anyways he will kill me" Your voice is frantic, more panicked than you have sounded in a while.

He takes his eyes off of your scar, the first time you guys make eye contact after exposing your innermost traumas. "y/n..." his voice is basically a whisper, but you see the anger. The anger in his clenched fists and his furrowed brow. The hatred sparkling in his eyes at what happened to you. You find yourself confused because you expected pity or even nothing as you figured he would take back his feelings, not wanting to try things with someone so damaged. Here he was though, keeping his anger in control so he doesn't scare you, and asking if he can come closer or touch you.

"Bradley please" and maybe it's the desperation in your voice or the pleading in your eyes but he clenches his jaw and nods. You find yourself reaching up, hand reaching his face and thumb rubbing his jaw trying to get him to relax. He reaches his own hand up, resting his on top of yours.

"I won't do anything y/n, but I'm never letting anything happen to you again." his eyes hold such a fierceness that you truly believe him, and it's as if this is the first time you feel safe, truly safe, in a year.

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@alanadetigy

#rooster imagine #bradley rooster bradshaw #rooster bradshaw #rooster x reader #bradley bradshaw x reader #top gun #top gun maverick #bradley bradshaw #bradley bradshaw imagine #rooster x y/n

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