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caelivir · 3 months

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hidden lights | rayne ames

— synopsis. reading rayne ames is impossible. that's why you don't get why he offers to take you out on a date after you've been stood up again.

— pairing. rayne ames x fem!reader

— genres. modern au, you and rayne are roommates, fluff, you’re so oblivious it hurts, rayne's most likely ooc towards the end but we do it for plot,

— warnings. one kys thrown in at the end but it’s not in a serious manner

— word count. 3.2k

— notes. in honor of triple liner rayne being animated. i have quite literally been waiting to see it animated for years. also hi.

you can never tell what rayne ames is thinking. he wears the same cold, uninterested glare on his face at all times of the day. he never speaks unless spoken to, never lets you know when he leaves the apartment, never does anything to show that he actually has emotions.

you're asked on the daily how you survive rooming with him, and in all honesty, it's really not that bad. he does his half of the chores, and he doesn't leave his shit all over the apartment. really, the guy's only problem is his lack of emotion. it drives you up the wall.

finn says not to take it to personally during the one day he visited his brother. apparently, he's like that with everyone, but he's still a good guy. it just takes time.

you would like to believe that, but rayne makes that extremely difficult to believe when he looks like he wants to kill every person who so happens to exist in his direction.

so naturally, seeing him so angered after finding out that you've been stood up is surprising. it's an even bigger shock when he offers to take you out on a date instead.

you don't know what compels you to agree. even if you hadn't accepted his offer, something tells you that rayne would've found a way to get you to leave with him so there's no use in trying to deny him in this matter.

that's why you allow him to drive all the way to marchétte street, where a night market is being held in full swing. the road has all sorts of stalls lined up one after the other, ranging from foods to clothes. but because the marchétte night market is ridiculously popular, the place is packed to the brim with people.

rayne offers his hand once he notices that you're daunted by the crowds. you stare at him with surprise. when you don't make a move to accept this action, rayne huffs before grabbing your hand. he interlocks his fingers with yours and drags you into marchétte street's traffic.

the first thing you note is that rayne's hands are surprisingly warm and soft. for someone so incapable of talking, his touch is strangely reassuring.

he drags you to a vendor selling takoyaki. and even as he orders, rayne doesn’t let go of your hand.

“what do you want?” he says into your ear so that he doesn’t have to yell over all the noise. the feeling of his breath fanning over your skin sends shivers down your spin. it's maddening.

“oh. uh-” your eyes quickly scan over the menu, and you blurt out the first item that you read. out of habit you reach for your wallet, but rayne is quick to shut you down.

“absolutely not.” he grumbles, letting your hand drop to your side so he can pull out his cash. rayne hands the amount to the girl at the register, and she hands back his change that he drops into the tip jar.

“thanks.” you say quietly, still so flustered about the entire situation.

rayne only studies you before humming in acknowledgement. “come on.” he guides his hand to your upper back, moving you out the way so you can wait on the side for your orders.

it’s during this time you really look at rayne as if that would provide you with the answers you need to understand him. you try to wrap your head around it. you draft up every possible explanation, but none of them seem to make sense.

unless… it couldn’t be… does rayne like you? you shake your head, dismissing the thought as soon as it crosses your mind. no, that’s absurd, the furthest thing from logical. this is rayne ames we’re talking about. in the five months that you’ve been living together, you two have never had a solid conversation. how could he ever like someone he’s barely talked to?

you're about to confront rayne about his intentions until your number order is called, and all the courage you built up crumbles away as rayne leaves you to go pick up your takoyaki.

still, whatever his reasons for doing this may be, this is a rare opportunity to come by, and that means that maybe rayne doesn't have to continue being a stranger. maybe you can get under those layers and find that good guy finn said was there.

"i never knew marchétte had a night market." you say, breaking the silence as the two of you walk side by side through the market.

"i didn't either." rayne admits, poking his fork into one of the octopus balls, and shoving the whole thing into his mouth.

"what?" your face scrunches in disbelief. "then how'd you find out?"

"i asked finn as we were going down to the garage." your date shares nonchalantly.

you turn to look at rayne with the intent of questioning him further, but the sight of his cheeks bulging with food makes you burst out in a fit of giggles.

"what?" rayne asks, narrowing his eyes at you. you bite your lip to contain your laughter. your gaze falls on a mixture of crumbs and sauce that sits on the corner of his mouth, only causing you to smile wider.

"you got a little something there." you gesture at his lips. rayne fumbles for a moment, swiping his fingers around various sections of his mouth, somehow only cleaning half of the mess up.

you shake your head, still grinning up at him. he tenses when your thumb grazes the edges of his lips. you can feel his eyes staring deep into you, and you have to ignore the way it makes your stomach flip.

"all done." you whisper, wiping the remainders on the napkin in your hand.

rayne doesn't say anything regarding what occurred, only urging you to follow him further down marchétte street.

you swear that you see the tips of his ears go red, and something about that makes you all fuzzy inside.

as the night progresses, you and rayne abide your time by visiting stalls. well, it's more like you choose which ones interest you the most, and rayne follows behind. you comment on certain items that look nice; sometimes, you ask for your roommate's opinions to decide on whether something will be worth your money or not. to your surprise, rayne's advice is solid, and you end up listening to him.

at some point, you convinced him to buy a pair of absurdly looking mugs for the apartment. he fought you hard on it, saying that a mug shaped like a fish is extremely inconvenient, but in the end, you won with insistent begging.

when the two of you both got bored of the market, you decide to take rayne to one of your favorite spots in the city.

"the park? really?" rayne gives you a dead stare.

"hey, don't judge." you pout. "i love this place."

"why? no offense, but i don't think parks are all that special."

"i feel like i can take a step back here and just a catch a break from everything," you answer honestly. "sometimes, i sit down and watch people as they live their lives, and something about that is strangely comforting. it makes me want to keep going."

rayne doesn't follow up on your words, but you can tell that he's really considering them, and that brings a smile onto your face.

"plus, i feel like it's a good place for when you want to talk to someone." you grab onto your roommate's wrist. "come on let's go to the swings."

you practically drag rayne to the playground, which is completely deserted, but that's to be expected when it's already 10p.m. no parent would be dumb enough to bring their kid out this late.

you force rayne onto the the swing next to you, and all he does is sit there, unwilling to indulge himself in such a simple joy. annoyed with him, you hop off your own set, coming behind him.

"what are you doing?" rayne whips his head around as your hands plant themselves firmly on his back.

"oh live a little." you huff, mustering up enough strength to push him. the swing rocks forwards and comes back. even as rayne complains and threatens you, you continue to push him, watching as he goes higher and higher. he may be masking it, but you can tell that he's enjoying it.

you finally give up when your arms grow sore and a layer of sweat coats your face. slumping back into the swing beside rayne, you breathe heavily. "man, that was a workout."

"i told you to stop." your date reminds you, shooting you a look.

"you can be honest, rayne. i know you liked it."

"i did not."

"yeah, yeah, keep telling yourself that." you wave him off, laughing.

for a minute, neither of you say anything. you're the one who said that the park is a place where you can talk openly with someone, yet there's not a single topic that you can think to bring up.

luckily, rayne swoops in to save it. "can i ask you something?" your half-blonde roommate asks, something more serious laced in his voice. it makes you swallow a lump in your throat. an anxious feeling creeps into your body.

"of course you can."

"why did you bother giving that guy a chance?"

it's easy to know exactly who he's referring to. you shrug. "he's nice and has good energy."

"but he had stood you up two times in the past though. clearly he isn't as nice as you make him out to be. you seriously can't be that dumb to have fallen for it three times."

that statement in itself should get you mad (even though he would be right), but there's something peculiar in what he said that had you ignoring the jab altogether. "how'd you know he stood me up twice before? i never told you that."

at that, rayne freezes, eyes blowing wide open. it's so obvious that he's trying to find an excuse right now, but you push further.

"who told you that, rayne?" you lean closer, watching as his ears turn beet red. you're not even angry with him. it's mostly curiosity making you push him. not to mention that seeing him in a flustered state is entertaining and quite cute.

"max did." your roommate finally admits albeit quietly.

you pull your head back. "max? as in max land? how the hell does he know?"

"your dates happened to be at the restaurant he works at."

"why would he bother telling you that though?" you wonder. "up until tonight, i don't think it concerned you."

"it did though." the half-blonde mumbles, thinking you wouldn't hear, but you do anyway.

"what?" you press.

"forget it." rayne shakes his head, growing irritated.

"no. fuck that.." you seethe, annoyed at his unwillingness to be honest with you. rayne bites his tongue to hold back. you see it. "don't act like this. just tell me, or i swear to god i'll text max right now-"

"it's because i knew that i could treat you better." the words rush out of rayne's mouth as he snaps his head toward you. the fire in his eyes die as he locks his gaze onto you. the harsh emotion written across his features softens. you can feel your own exasperation slipping away like that of a retreating ocean tide. he grimaces in regret, knowing that he didn't mean to let that slip out, but he did anyway. it's out in the open, and now you knew.

surely, you're hearing things wrong. perhaps you're misunderstanding what he just said. how could that be misinterpreted though? it's such a painfully straightforward statement, yet it still doesn't make any sense.

rayne sighs. it's like he can already hear your thoughts and your confusion. the least he can do is clear the air and dump everything onto you while he can. "i didn't expect to feel like this," he begins to explain. "when i moved in, i just assumed you'd be another person i wouldn't pay attention to. i'm sure you know how i am. i don't bother getting to know people, but a lot of people feel the need to force themselves into my life, and shit like that pisses me off. but you didn't do that. you introduced yourself, explained the ground rules of the apartment, and then left me alone."

"so... you like the fact that i leave you alone?" you tilt your head.

"shut up. let me finish."

"okay."

"but yeah, that's part of it. you keep your distance, but you still try to show that you care. you don't do anything groundbreaking. it's just that the small things you do for me got to me. it may sound dumb to you, but it meant a lot to me."

suddenly, you're hit like a train because you know exactly what rayne means. you recall all the times you ensured that there was dinner for him, the times you moved his laundry into the dryer when he forgot to do it himself, and the times you restocked his favorite snacks when they ran out. you hadn't realized that you did any of that. it just came naturally, no hidden meaning behind it.

"oh." you breathe out, blinking.

rayne nods, continuing. you're honestly floored over the fact that he still has more to say. "you don't notice it. at least, i don't think you do, but at some point, i tried doing the same for you. i started paying more attention to you and what you liked and how you liked things done. i did it mostly to pay back your kindness, but over time i continued just 'cause i liked seeing your smile."

you have to process that for a minute, piecing together how certain events lined up until it finally clicks into place. "s-so the island vase-"

"i replace the flowers because you like them fresh."

"the key holder?"

"you always forgot to bring your keys until i installed it."

"when you put on movies-"

"i check your letterboxd and hope that you'll sit and watch them with me."

"when i put on movies-"

"i sit with you because i want to be near you."

your jaw falls open. never in a million years could you have expected this. you thought that rayne could care less about your existence, but the reality was that that was far from the truth. cold, aloof rayne was always doing things for you. all this time, you've been so oblivious.

still, there's more to the story so you stay quiet, letting him get his feelings off of his chest. "to be honest, i was never going to say anything. max tried convincing me to confess on multiple occasions, but i was dead set on letting it pass. i didn't think you liked me in the same way anyway.

"but then you came home today and you told me about your date and i just got so... angry," rayne clenches his fist around the chains of the swing. the whole situation infuriates him every time he thinks about it. "it just wasn't fair. you spent so much time into looking your best just for that asshole to go and waste your effort. you're so beautiful, so kind and understanding, and i fucking hate the fact that he's been taking advantage of that.

"i really wasn't thinking clear when i proposed this date to you, but god after tonight, i'd do it all over again. i wanted you to know what it's like to be with someone who does care about you. i wanted to see you smile. i wanted to hear stories. i want you so badly it's all i can think about sometimes.

"i know this is a lot, and i'm freaking you out right now. i'm sorry but you-"

"rayne." you interrupt with a big smile on your face. he was unaware to the fact that you had got up.

"for fucks sake, can you let me finish? this is already weird enough for me to talk about as is." he rolls his eyes, narrowing his gaze at you, blush splashed across his cheeks. still, without any resistance, you pull him up from his swing by his wrists.

"then don't." you whisper as you pull him in.

and the moment you crash your lips onto rayne's, the world stops. he instantly melts into you, the palms of his hands finding the soft skin on your cheeks. your hands tangle themselves into his hair. his lips are incredibly soft. a faint taste of matcha and sugar syrup dances on his tongue from the boba he drank earlier. a noise of approval vibrates down his throat, and you can't help but smile against his lips.

rayne wraps an arm around your waist, pulling you impossibly closer as he deepens the kiss. you get what he was talking about earlier. this kiss is all it takes to prove it to you. you feel his affection and desire all at once. every single bone in your body is so aware of how much rayne ames cares about you.

when you finally pull away for air, it's like a smile is permanently tugged onto your lips. rayne trains his eyes onto you, engraining every detail of this moment into his head.

a comfortable silence falls as each of you take your time to catch your breaths. your stare finds its way up, admiring the night sky. there are barely any stars out tonight. no, that part isn't remotely true, not fully anyway, because light pollution drowns out stars and their lights. the reality is that there are billions of stars hanging high out of reach; they just go unseen.

rayne is kinda like that you realize. finn was right. his brother is a good guy. there's a hidden light within him behind all those aloof layers of his. you just have to squint and maybe put on some prescription glasses is order to see it. it's a shame it took you five months to to really acknowledge it. but now that you've finally found a glimpse of it, you'll continue to clear past the fog. you want to know every part of rayne and see his light just as he did with you. you want him to be able to shine at his full brightness with no fear. you'll take rayne ames for all that he is.

"come on," you coo, a lovestruck look in your eyes as you slip your hand into rayne's. "let's go home."

bonus:

rayne: finn, give me a date spot quick finn: are you actually going on a date? rayne: stop asking questions finn: there's a night market on marchétte street. finn: are you seriously going on a date though? finn: hello? finn: rayne. finn: stop leaving me on read. finn: is it (y/n)? finn: it is her, huh? finn: asshole.

delisaster: hey sorry delisaster: can we reschedule for next saturday? y/n: kys y/n: lol sorry that was my bf delisaster: bruh what? delisaster: did you have a bf this whole time? *this message could not be sent* delisaster: did you fucking block me? *this message could not be sent*

#anime #manga #mashle #mashle magic and muscles #mashle x reader #rayne ames #rayne x reader #rayne ames x reader #from kor ; ♆

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doberbutts · 3 months

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What do you think gay men are attracted to in men that they can’t be attracted to in women?

It can’t be anything about femininity or masculinity obviously. That’s both sexist, and cultural so can’t be what drives men-only attraction.

It can’t be anything about stated identity because someone could lie just as easily as they could tell the truth in such a statement, and it makes no sense because homosexuality and heterosexuality exists in other species with no stated identities. It’s not like other animals without gender are all pan.

Saying idk it’s the vibes or some indescribable trait men have that women can’t but “I can’t explain” is a nonanswer.

Soooooooo what is it? Or do you think any sexuality but bi/pan is just cultural performance or an identity rather than an inborn orientation?

- [ ]

I know you're saying this to be transphobic but the answer is, genuinely, I don't know because I've never been able to describe what makes me attracted to some people but not others.

Most gay men aren't attracted to every man alive. While sometimes one can name physical traits or personality types, sometimes it really is just "I dunno, there's just something about him". What is that something? What drives that attraction? I don't think anyone has the answer to that. I don't always know what draws me to some men over others- at this point there's often some amount of physical and personality traits that many have in common, but not all of them, and not everyone with those traits catches my eye.

I understand you feel this is a non-answer but it's also the answer given to me by the cis gay men I have dated, as well as the one that most closely aligns with how I experience attraction 🤷‍♂️

If you don't want to date trans people, don't date trans people. I don't want to date someone that doesn't want to date me either. I have enough men thirsting over me and my body that I don't need your approval for anything I do in bed with those men.

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maliciouslove · 1 year

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𝕀𝕞𝕡𝕒𝕥𝕚𝕖𝕟𝕥 𝕐𝕖𝕝𝕝𝕠𝕨

ʚ pairing ɞ stepbrother!denki kaminari x reader

NSFW, dark content, aged up characters (21+)

ʚ word count ɞ 4.7k

ʚ summary ɞ having a step brother isn’t easy, especially if he is as fun and good looking as yours. you always got along just fine, but some very depraved and dark corner of your mind always forced you to look at him different, to imagine things that were taboo—to touch yourself while thinking of him. so when you had to crash at his place for a couple of days while your apartment was being fumigated, things escalated rather fast. i mean, it’s fine if it doesn’t go in, right?

ʚ tags ɞ mention of death (reader’s mother), tw stepcest, tw dubcon, masturbation, tw voyeurism, oral (f!receiving), tw spit, pussyjob, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, breeding, recording, blackmail

Most people say that having a parent remarry and having step-siblings is awful. You, however, don't see it that way.

Despite the devastation of losing your mother at a young age, you were grateful to your father for stepping up and taking care of you with everything he had after your mother's passing. You were 4 at the time, and things didn’t quite make sense until you got older—but with time, the more you matured, the more you came to terms with the situation. The older you got, the better you understood how much of a super dad you actually had—on the one hand, he always prioritized you, gave you everything he could and made sure that you didn’t miss out on anything, partially spoiling his little girl. On the other hand, he also chose to be very honest with you and talk to you about difficult topics instead of shying away from them. Therefore, you were able to understand what happened to your mother and were fully supported while working through the grief.

For all this, you were truly grateful to your dad, though, there came a time where you became aware of all the sacrifices that he had made for your sake as well. Turns out, that he avoided dating anyone else for the longest of times, resulting in you having to actually push him into pursuing romance and give him your slightly aggressive blessing.

"Dad, it's just a date." You roll your eyes at him.

"It feels like I'm betraying your mother, our family."

"Dad," you hold his gaze firmly. "Mom is gone. I'm in high school. And you deserve to be happy! Get out there, have some fun!" You push him forcefully out the front door and fix the collar of his shirt. "Don't be home too late, I’ll leave you some lasagna in the fridge. Now go!"

And when he found someone that made him happy, someone that made his worries go away, you were nothing but supportive. She was gorgeous and smart and had witty remarks that made you laugh, so you accepted her into your life. However, she also had a son, the same age as you—a tall and lanky boy named Denki Kaminari.

The first time you met him it was awkward, you were both 18—just about to graduate from high school, you were shy and quiet and he was just all over the place, bouncing with energy. But you found common ground, talking about games and anime, so you became friends rather quickly, progressively spending more and more time together. You’ve always been an honest person so denying that you thought he was handsome was pointless—fluffy blonde hair and amber eyes that turn gold in the sunlight, he had a very intoxicating smile, and most importantly of all—he made you laugh. But he was your dad’s girlfriend’s son, so he was—in all ways possible—off limits to you. Therefore you were content just admiring him from afar.

Sometimes, you stared a bit too much, making up scenarios in your head before bedtime, turning off all the lights before you push your panties aside, ashamed that it's him you’re thinking about.

And here you were, two years later walking your respective parents down the aisle, grinning at each other and testing out how it feels to refer to each other as brother and sister.

"Okay little sis, shall we hit the open bar, get wasted and embarrass our parents?"

"Totally, big brother," you winked at him and his face turned red at a comically fast pace.

"Okay, how about we drop the sis ‘n bro stuff? Feels weird."

"Does it now, big brother?" you bat your eyelashes at him, a seductive smile plastered on your lips. All Denki can manage is a dramatic groan in response, walking away quickly, hearing you cackle as the distance between you two grew larger.

He might be off limits, even more so now that he was your step brother, but you still enjoyed making him flustered. The perk of it was that it was extremely easy to do so—blow some air on his nape, trace a finger along his jawline and he’s ready to turn into a puddle on the floor.

And you did this within limits. Of course.

Your parents were happy that the both of you got along so well, and even happier when you both got accepted into the same college, living in the same city. Although you studied different courses, rarely seeing each other on campus, you did occasionally go to parties together, Denki making sure to get your drunk ass back home safely every time. He was kind and dependent and always had your back.

Even more so when you had discovered that your suspiciously cheap rental apartment was infested with termites, having to be fully fumigated, and you had to ask your step brother if you could crash at his place for a couple of days.

“Of course!” his voice sounded chipper over the phone. “We’re so totally having a Marvel marathon, I am not taking no for an answer, pack your shit and come over, I’ll have nachos ready in 30 minutes.”

The line went silent as he hung up and you found yourself smiling at his enthusiasm. A voice at the back of your head told you he’d be such a fine boyfriend—if he wasn’t your step brother.

Yet, you allowed yourself a few minutes of imagining what kind of dates he would take you on—arcade dates, bringing you to museums so he can narrate over the audio guide with absolute nonsense and making some lame joke about van Gogh and George Weasly and ‘hole-y’. You shake your head as if to purge the thoughts and you get on with packing your essentials for the next couple of days.

You stare at your underwear drawer and contemplate. Would it be weird if you pick the sexiest lingerie you own... just to stay at your step brother's place for a few days? Totally not.

“Self-care.” You say to yourself as you take out several lacy thongs and bralettes that match, carefully placing them in your suitcase. You just like wearing nice underwear, what’s the big deal? It’s only for you to see anyway.

Right?

Happy with the items you’ve packed, double checking if you’ve got your toothbrush and all your chargers— you take a deep breath and vacate your apartment, heading over to Denki’s.

“We should’ve just gotten an apartment together, it would’ve been so much cheaper and nicer.” Denki whined as he helped you carry your suitcase up the stairs, as his building had no elevator.

“So what I’m hearing is you want to see my pretty face every day, correct?” you smirked, noticing the barely visible butt clench he did upon hearing your words, at which you chuckled. “Honestly, you’d get sick of me in about a week so be glad we don’t live together.”

He grumbles something you can't understand under his breath and you allow him to move on from the topic.

The first night in his apartment goes well—you have dinner together and then proceed with a quiet movie night. Snuggled together under a fuzzy blanket, the light of the TV was illuminating Denki’s face, showing off his best features—playful amber eyes, devilish smile and a sharp jawline. You spent more time looking at said face and judging the softness of his blonde locks, rather than looking at whatever movie he put on for you.

The realization that you haven’t gotten laid for a few months now and that your step brother is awfully handsome makes you feel a certain way, insides knotting up and devious thoughts plaguing your mind.

Mindlessly, you place your hand on his thigh under the blanket and you feel his body immediately tense up under your touch. Kaminari tries to play it off cool, like nothing has happened, keeping his gaze fixed on the screen.

So that’s how you wanna play, hm?

Your hand travels up and down his thigh, caressing it, squeezing it every once in a while and slowly but surely going further up with each stroke. At the same time you maintain a blank façade, pretending to be fully focused on the movie.

Once your hand starts getting dangerously close to his now semi-hard cock, Denki lets out a fake cough and gets up under the pretense of getting ice cream and some new drinks. Your eyes follow his frame as he exits the room almost skittishly and the dangerous thoughts make you lick your lips in excitement.

He’d look very cute broken and torn up over experiencing sexual desire towards his little step sister.

A plan begins forming in your head.

You spend the rest of the evening making Denki’s temperature rise and his ears turn red with embarrassment—a subtle press of your tits against his arm when you cling to it, removing stray hairs from his face with a gentle hand, accidentally tracing his jawline with your finger, keeping his gaze just a tad longer than appropriate.

Meanwhile, Kaminari continues shifting uncomfortably in his seat, trying to find a pose that would allow him to hide how turned on he is, purposefully avoiding looking down your cleavage or observing how your shorts were riding up your thighs, revealing more plush skin that he wanted to sink his teeth into.

You don’t push too far though, you still had a couple of more days staying at his place, plenty of time to make your plan come to fruition. The movie comes to an end and you both decide to call it a night—you kiss his cheek and thank him again for allowing you to stay over, wishing him a good night and heading over to the guest bedroom where you were staying. His own room was right next door and you begin wondering how thin the walls really are.

Removing your clothes and kicking your panties aside, you make yourself comfortable on the bed and slide your hands down your torso, imagining how much bigger Denki’s would be, warmer than your own, eager.

Your mind conjures images of your step brother losing himself under you as you hover over his face, tongue lapping at your core like a starved man, staring up at you with those intoxicating cat-like amber eyes. Cupping your breast, a low moan escapes your lips as your other hand glides between your legs, humming with approval of how wet you are because of your step brother.

You touch yourself, rolling your nipples between your thumb and index finger, drawing circles on your clit and letting your mind relish in all the taboo things you want to do with Denki, paying less and less attention to the needy sounds bouncing off of the walls, yet hoping that they reach Denki’s ears.

And they do—in the other room Denki has his ear pressed to the wall, already fumbling with the zipper of his pants, his face so red and hot because he knows how wrong this is. You’re his little sister, not by blood, but you were family, and God, you were still incredibly gorgeous and just his type.

He had put so much effort over the years into not being a creep, not watching your ass as you walk away or blatantly staring at your tits. He had learned to be subtle, to be unnoticeable, to steal glances and satisfy himself by just imagining your lips around his cock—just that, nothing more.

But now, having you in his apartment, being surrounded by the scent of your perfume mixed with the coconut-scented shampoo you use—he was losing his mind. You’d been so much more touchy than usual this evening and your hand on his thigh made him feel dirty, so here he was now, listening in on you, knowing full well what you were doing and how incredibly wrong this was, invading your privacy and taking advantage of it, but he couldn’t help it.

Lip tucked between his teeth to keep quiet, he spits onto his palm and spreads his saliva over his cock, slowly fucking into his fist, trying to match your pace he was trying to guess from the cute whines he could hear. He imagined you spreading your pussy for him, beckoning him to take advantage of you, calling him ‘big brother’ in that seductive voice of yours that could drive him mad. Hearing you panting louder, breath uneven and needy, he allows himself to go faster, now picturing himself pushing his cock into your tight little hole, imagining his cum leaking out of you and just like that, faster than he’s ever experienced, he came in his hand shooting thick ropes of cum onto his knuckles and pillow, his heart threatening to leave his chest cavity.

The post-nut clarity hits him and Denki is plagued with shame and guilt, quickly removing his pillowcase and bedsheets and tossing them to the side, replacing the old one with new clean ones while mentally berating himself, feeling disgusted with his own actions.

He no longer hears you moaning in the other room, the sweet sound dying down and feels relieved, shoving his face into the freshly changed pillow and trying not to scream at himself. It felt like he had committed a crime, a sin of some sort, his own guilty conscience not allowing him to get much sleep, forcing Kaminari to toss and turn for the most part of the night, shaking his head as if trying to push away the thoughts of your breasts in his mouth out of his mind by force.

The next day, he seems to be the same, shoulders sagged with guilt, barely managing to look you in the eye during breakfast. Both of you had classes, so you drive to campus together and Denki, happy to have a distraction from his lewd thoughts about his own step sister.

You on the other hand keep your focus on your plan the entire day, not paying attention to a single lecture, forgetting to even eat lunch—completely consumed by your desire to have your step brother snap.

You had it all figured out—with your classes finishing earlier than Kaminari’s, you could head home before him and use the spare key he gave you to prepare for his return. You knew your brother was very curious, not a doubt in your mind that he would seek you out when he got in and you hoped that what he found would be enough to make Denki lose control.

And to no surprise, everything goes exactly according to your vision. You shower and put on some of that pretty lingerie you had brought with you, leaving the door to your room slightly cracked open, whilst entertaining yourself until the target audience for your little performance had returned home.

You’re lying on the bed—face down, ass up when you hear the front door open, the sound making you quiver with excitement, heart beating even faster as his footsteps approach, the fingers playing with your clit speeding up, your arousal dribbling down your thighs in fat droplets

The house was suspiciously quiet, leading Denki to believe you hadn’t gotten back yet. He’d kicked his shoes off to the side, tossing his bag onto the couch before heading towards his room with the intention to shed off his outside clothes and switch into something more comfortable. That didn’t end up being the case. Noticing that the door to your room was ajar, he takes a quick glance through the crack, freezing in his tracks as his sunshine eyes fixate on your drooling cunt, clenching around nothing, your arousal soaked fingers toying with your puffy folds. In this position you can’t see him, so Kaminari basks in the sight for a few moments to enjoy this, to memorize it and engrave the image of your cute cunt into his mind—trying hard to ignore the raging boner in his pants.

Kaminari gulps, feeling as if there’s a massive lump in his throat, right hand absentmindedly adjusting his now hard cock.

“Denks,” your needy voice shocks him out of his trance. “Please...”

His brain short circuits.

Time feels frozen, the noise of the outside world fading into nothing and the sound of his heartbeat ringing in his head deafeningly loud.

His name just left your mouth.

You said his name. You begged for him.

Once more, Kaminari hears his name, watching you arch your back even more, spreading your legs further and sinking down onto the bed while begging for him incoherently.

Denki sits there, motionless, watching his little step sister cumming hard, making a mess on the bed sheets while chanting his name.

For many years, his sanity and patience were tested—like a string tightly pulled back. In this single moment as he watched his step sister shake in the aftermath of her orgasm, that string finally snapped.

He opens the door, slowly at first and then in two short strides he’s behind you, pulling you up by the hair, pressing your back to his chest and breathing hard down your neck.

“You’re a fucking tease, you know that little sis?” Inhaling in your scent, the blonde holds you tight against him, tugging on your hair again to force you to look up at the ceiling—knowing he wouldn’t be able to have any self-restraint if he looked into your eyes.

“Moaning my name as you cum? You want your big brother that badly, hm?” His throbbing shaft presses against your ass, still clad in jeans, but you could feel it through the fabric.

You shut your eyes in embarrassment but don’t attempt to escape his grip, the lack of response to his question makes Denki even more impatient.

“Answer.” he growls in your ear.

“Y-Yes,” your voice comes out uneven. “I w-want my stepbrother, please.”

Your eyes stay tightly shut but your body gives your reaction away—shaking with anticipation and excitement, feeling your juices begin to slide between your folds again.

“Didn’t think you were this sick in the head, but who am I to refuse my precious little sister, huh?” You can't see his face but you can hear the sinister smile, feel how thrilled he is by the way his grip on you tightens. Suddenly, Kaminari’s pushing your head back down onto the mattress, crouching down to take a good look at your glistening wet cunt. Your little pleasure nub looks so cute and swollen he can't help himself by giving it an experimental lick, appreciating the way your body tenses. So he does it again and again—paying good attention to your needy bud, kissing and lightly sucking on it, mapping out how you react to each movement.

You drip like sweet honey onto Denki’s tongue, showering him in lustful mewls and needy grinds against his face, tiny fists balling the sheets when he slips his tongue inside your needy hole. He eats you out like a man starving, holding your hips steadily in place. Your big brother loves the way your thighs tremble and your breath is uneven and he is determined to get you to cum on his tongue, he needs it.

And it doesn’t take long for your slick to overflow from your body, the thought alone that your step brother’s chin was shining with your mess was enough to make you melt into a puddle, the taboo aspect of what you were doing pushing you over the edge too quickly.

With a silent cry, you cum hard, pressing yourself against Kaminari’s face, a trickle of drool sliding down your own chin as your eyes roll back from pleasure so intense, your senses become overloaded for a moment that all you see is white.

Before you come back down from your high and your soul returns to its body, Denki has managed to kick aside his jeans and boxers, knees digging into the edge of the mattress and his leaking cock glides between your sticky folds.

For a split second an uneasy feeling captures your heart in an icy grip.

“Don’t worry. It’s okay if it doesn’t go in, right little sis?” the blonde’s voice is thickly coated with smugness, with a sense of toxicity that should be so incredibly off-putting, yet it makes your insides twist with desire.

Two orgasms in, and your head starts to feel fuzzy, the heat emanating from his length rubbing against your slit making you feel like you have one foot off of the edge of insanity. You circle your ass against his dick, desperate and teary-eyed, pleading and chanting his name like it’s a prayer, enjoying the friction of your step brother’s mushroom cockhead against your sensitive clit.

His hands explore the expanse of your body, following the curves and dips of your hips, squeezing the doughy skin on your hips. Denki was greedily taking in every weak sigh you let out and every shudder you respond with, basking in the knowledge that he’s the one making his little sister drip down on his girth, oozing into the sheets and making a mess of them. You feel the heat rising inside you, knots forming in the pit of your stomach, the madness creeping further across your brain with the sound of Denki’s filthy words in your ear. The sound of his dick slipping back and forth on your wet cunt. Everything is so obscene, even the scent of him is working you up more, the knots twisting tighter.

You crave more.

You shouldn’t.

Denki—he’s your step brother there would be so many consequences, so many drawbacks of your current situation.

But consequences be damned, because the vein on the underside of his shaft feels so good against your sensitive clit, so much so that your brain throws all logic and reason out the window.

Denki is nearly as desperate as you are, and he gripes and grunts loudly—so close to release, just from the wetness of your pretty pussy engulfing him. So when you lift your hips up and angle them against the head of his girth, pushing past your entrance with ease—he nearly loses it.

The softness and warmth of your cunt wrapping around his cock makes him feel like his soul is ascending to high heavens, eyes rolling back in his skull and body shaking in ecstasy with every inch of him that you take until he’s fully sheathed in you, balls laying flat against your swollen pleasure nub.

You don’t give him time to prepare, to react even—slamming your hips back against his as quickly as your body can handle, yearning for that the feeling of the tip of his dick reaching deep inside of you and helping the pressure build even faster.

Cock drunk and cross-eyed, absolutely debauched and unashamed, your body forces out another orgasm, causing your muscles to spasm with a string of curses leaving your pretty lips as your soft walls clamp down on the blonde’s dick.

Denki sees stars, the only thought crossing his mind in that moment being that he will never have pussy this good ever again—so snug against him, pulsing violently around his length, selfishly sucking him in deeper. And with that singular thought, your step brother decides to fuck you stupid, make you feel the exact same way he does—like nothing would ever be good enough again.

Snapping out of the trance your perfect pussy has put him in, he props up a leg on the bed, pulling his length out of your heat and marveling at the way your cunt gleams luxuriously with the crude mix of his precum and your erotic juices, clenching and spasming around nothing. You whimper, but before you can clearly state your protest, Kaminari spits on your raw and abused mound, slamming his entire length into you once more, with only a single motion, setting a meteoric pace—spreading your ass cheeks apart so he can fuck into you harder.

Forgetting all his previous misgivings about fucking his little sister, Denki gives into his carnal desire and takes everything he can from you. A thumb now collecting the arousal from between your legs and using it as lubrication to toy with your pert ass, slowly pushing in the digit into you as you become impossibly tighter around him.

“One more time—I need to feel you cum around my cock one more time, sis,” Angling his hips to hit your sweet spot with every thrust, Denki practically makes you scream out his name, the blistering heat of his cockhead kissing your cervix repeatedly, leaving your brain absolutely scrambled.

You don’t even think it’s possible for you to cum again, but the telltale signs of your impending orgasm are there. However, it feels different this time, as if there’s some sort of pressure bubbling up inside you—like a volcano ready to erupt. A string of pleas leave your wet lips, not really knowing what you’re begging for but Denki understands—maintaining the same angle and rhythm, he sneaks a hand around your torso to rub gentle circles over your puffy clit, the action pushing you over the edge.

With a loud cry, you tense up around him so hard that he has to pull out, clear liquid gushing from your aching cunt as you squirt onto the bed and taint Kaminari’s golden skin, body shaking violently with tears streaming down your face until you’re overwhelmed by the feeling. The view of your pussy gushing and squirting is so enticing, but Denki is too greedy to allow you time to calm down, grabbing your hips and propping you up, lining his tip with your sopping entrance again and drilling into you at a ravenous pace.

You’re too sensitive, too sore, even—but he holds you firm against his chest, a hand around your throat, slightly restricting your breathing and keeping you from protesting while the blonde chases down his own release.

“ ‘m not fucking pulling out,” he growls into the shell of your ear, a cruel smile twitching at the corners of his lips. Kaminari’s words make you clamp down greedily on him, body instinctively trying to milk him for all he’s worth.

A couple more ruthless thrusts of his cock deep into your abused little pussy and he’s thrown over the edge, balls tightening and thick cum spilling deep into your womb—there’s so much of it, too much, to the point where it’s leaking out of your hole before he’s even pulled out. Your insides are burning hot with his seed and you can’t even be bothered to remind yourself if you’re on birth control or not, too fucked out to be able to conjure up a coherent thought.

Slowly pulling away, the tall blonde stares at your pink puffy pussy, thick cum oozing out in globs and dripping down your thighs—he collects the sticky substance with two fingers and promptly pushes the digits past your soft lips.

“Nasty little step sister, if I had known you were this slutty and desperate, I wouldn’t have spent countless nights fucking my fist—I would’ve fucked this pretty pussy of yours instead.” He taps the two digits that were in your mouth against your clit and your body jolts.

He moves away from the bed, grabbing something from your desk that you can’t see, still trying to collect yourself. Before you even had the chance to ask what it was, your step brother shows you his phone, the screen showing you a replay of what had just happened minutes before—a video of Denki fucking into you with no sound.

“Y-You recorded that?” the panic sobers you up as you quickly rise from the bed and try to take the phone from him.

But Kaminari’s much faster.

“Of course.” The corners of his lips turn upwards but the smile doesn’t quite reach his eyes. His body language shifts as he leans down, eyes raking over your naked, soiled body, a cool and foreboding aura seeping into the room, sneaking up on you. “Leverage, step sis.”

The words feel icy, goosebumps rising on your skin—with you barely recognizing the amber eyes looking down at you.

It was twisted, it was wrong, but one way or another—Denki Kaminari will keep you all to himself.

𝐃𝐈𝐒𝐂𝐋𝐀𝐈𝐌𝐄𝐑! I do not own any of the characters or people mentioned in my work. these are works of pure fiction that do not reflect the views, opinions, or actions of any person, real or fictional. Furthermore, all characters I write for [thirsts, drabbles, fics, etc.] are aged up to 21 or older – they are adults with adult characteristics presented and written in adult contexts.

all rights reserved © by maliciouslove. my work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License. all fanfics belong to me, please do not copy, translate nor repost the fics or files seen above as this is strictly prohibited.

#unholytext.exe #denki kaminari x reader #denki x reader #kaminari x reader #stepbrother!denki kaminari x reader #stepbrother denki #denki kaminari smut #denki smut #kaminari smut #bnha smut #mha smut #tw.stepcest #tw.dubcon #tw.voyeurism #tw.spit #tw.blackmail #tw.overstimulation #tw.breeding #tw.recording

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Dying Has Never Frightened Us: Intergenerational Trauma, Healing, & the Burden of Legacy in Castlevania

An analytical and interpretation essay that discusses how the concept of family legacy and duty can lead to intergenerational trauma in the Castlevania franchise. Focuses primarily on the Belmont who found strength from his pain by honouring his family’s legacy no matter how heavy it felt or the burden that came with it and the Belmont who found his own strength from the ones he loved and who loved him in return.

☽ Read the full piece here or click the read more for the text only version ☽

THE BURNING NEED FOR RETRIBUTION: INTRODUCTION

The world has trauma. It is deep, collective, spanning its roots over centuries and territories dating back to when the borders of today never existed, and it has largely gone untreated—but not undiscussed.

From children’s cartoons to award winning dramas, trauma has become one of the most common topics for media to discuss, depict, and dissect. It makes sense given the sort of physical and mental gauntlet which society has been through in the past five years. Sometimes even in just the past twenty-four hours. From an uptick in disasters stemming from climate change, the rise of publicised policy brutality, genocide as a result of settler colonisation, new developments coming to light after decades of denial regarding the residential school system in Canada, and of course a global pandemic which is still making ripples. Then there is the recent examination of generational trauma which differs from culture to culture. The open wounds we’ve already left and will be leaving for future age groups.

Seeing how fiction reflects reality and vice versa, it isn’t any wonder that movies, television shows, and video games find ways of processing this worldwide sensation of frustrated ennui along with the need to find answers as to how regular citizens can fix things, including ourselves, when politicians and world leaders cannot. When reality cannot provide satisfying resolutions, when we are left confused and even angrier than before due to the apparent shortcomings of institutions meant to provide relief towards the average person, it’s natural to look towards specific media. Whether for coping mechanisms, validation for this collective and personal trauma, or simply for cathartic release so the emotions don’t have to remain bottled up.

Castlevania , both its original 2017 series and the most recent entry of Castlevania: Nocturne (as well as the video games which the show is inspired by), is no stranger to this popular trend of storytelling and characterisation. Yet this trend also comes with its own controversy. When done with a deft writer’s hand and a layer of empathetic critical thinking, trauma in fiction and how we heal from its intergenerational effects can be a powerful tool in raising awareness in regards to something left forgotten by the larger public or it can allow viewers to look inwards at themselves. Done poorly or with a lack of empathy and taste, then the floodgates open.

But beyond the usual discourse surrounding trauma in fiction (how to portray a “realistic” panic attack, what makes a “good” victim, the problematic connotations of forgiving one’s abuser, etc.), Castlevania has its own things to say about the lingering effects of grief, guilt, and pain over the course of thirty-two episodes (now a fourty episode runtime with the inclusion of Castlevania: Nocturne season one). The series—particularly the first which ran from 2017 to 2021—has now gained a reputation for being one of the darker animated ventures tackling themes of religious corruption, abuse, sexual manipulation, and injustice among many others. The value and thoughtfulness of each depicted theme ranges from being genuinely compelling to delving into mere shock value yet the series is also known for its uplifting ending and cathartic release from such dark themes.

One could write entire dissertations on each complicated character and their developments. From Dracula’s suicidal tendencies as a result of unchecked grief to Isaac’s conflicted redemptive journey beginning with his unflinching loyalty to the king of vampires and ending with him forging down his own path in life. How characters such as Carmilla, consumed by her inner agonies and burning hatred towards the world to the bitter end, was left isolated from her sisters until she was forced to choose the terms of her own death, while others like Alucard, Sypha, and to an extent Hector rose above their individual torments in favour of hope and survival. However, this examination will focus on the series’ titular family of vampire hunters. Namely, the Belmont who found strength from his pain by honouring his family’s legacy no matter how heavy it felt or the burden that came with it and the Belmont who found his own strength from the ones he loved and who loved him in return.

Note: this essay will delve into speculations and purely interpretative hypotheses stemming from the author’s own opinions in regards to how they personally read the presented text. It will also discuss heavy spoilers for the majority of Castlevania games and the first season of Castlevania: Nocturne.

—

WHAT A HORRIBLE NIGHT FOR A CURSE: THE CYCLE OF TRAGEDY IN THE CASTLEVANIA GAMES

This examination begins in the exact same place as the show began with its inspirations and references: the original video games developed and distributed by Konami Group Corporations. It’s easy to get swept up in the notion that because of the technological limitations with video games at the time, the Castlevania games are devoid of story or characterization. Yet even the most bare bones of a story found in the games can still have something to say about the burden of legacy and how trauma left unconfronted has the possibility of tearing down that legacy. The most prominent example being Castlevania: Symphony of the Night , arguably the first game to begin delving into a deeper story and character driven narrative. It follows the events of Castlevania: Rondo of Blood , a game which portrayed its protagonist Richter Belmont as a force of nature in the face of evil, always knowing what to do, what to say, and emerging victorious without so much as breaking a sweat (or candelabra).

In keeping with the time of its release and the landscape of popular media particularly in Japan, Rondo of Blood feels like a traditional 1990s action anime complete with brightly coloured cutscenes and character designs reminiscent of Rumiko Takahashi and Rui Araizumi (despite the usual classic horror elements present in every Castlevania game). This is most evident with Maria Renard, the second playable protagonist who attacks with her own arsenal of magical animals and even has her own upbeat theme music during the credits when players complete the main story in “Maria mode”. Richter also shares many similar personality traits with his counterpart, namely his optimism in the face of danger and the confidence that he will be the hero of this narrative.

Of course all this changed in the direct follow-up to Rondo of Blood , the aforementioned Symphony of the Night . Arguably the new staple of future Castlevania games to come, not only did it change the gameplay and aesthetic, it changed the very core of the characters as well. The game even begins with the same ending as Rondo of Blood where Richter fights and defeats Dracula with the help of Maria. Then during the opening crawl, we discover that during a time skip, Richter has vanished and Maria is searching for him. Surely this will be nothing less than a heroic rescue and the most powerful Belmont of his century will be restored to his rightful pedestal.

Yet for the first half of Symphony of the Night , the player is faced with a sobering realisation—the villain we’re supposed to be fighting, the one responsible for conjuring Dracula’s castle back into existence, is Richter himself. No longer the hero we’ve come to adore and look up to from the previous game. Of course, the player along with new protagonist Alucard both know that something isn’t right; perhaps Richter isn’t in his sound mind or some nefarious force is possessing him to commit evil deeds. But unless the player solves the right puzzles and find the right in-game items, Symphony ends with Alucard putting down Richter like a rabid dog. However, this ending can be avoided and a whole second half of the game is revealed.

Richter’s canonical ending is left ambiguous at best, tragic at worst. He laments over his moment of weakness, claiming the events of the game were his fault despite Alucard’s insistence that confronting Dracula was always going to be inevitable. Still, the tragedy of Richter’s fate and how he is portrayed in Symphony of the Night comes much later, when it’s implied the Belmonts are no longer capable of wielding the fabled Vampire Killer, a leather whip imbued with supernatural properties that has been passed down generation after generation. One mistake and misjudgment left the Belmont legacy in a perpetual long lasting limbo with the titular hunters themselves seemingly disappearing from history as well, leaving others such as the Order of Ecclesia to pick up the fight against Dracula’s eventual resurgence. It isn’t until the height of World War II (the setting of Castlevania: Portrait of Ruin ) when the whip’s true potential is finally set free thanks to the actions of Jonathan Morris, a distant relative of the infamous vampire slaying family. However, the only way in which Jonathan can reawaken the Vampire Killer is by defeating a manifestation of the person who last wielded it and also whom the whip abandoned nearly two hundred years prior—Richter Belmont.

Yet players and fans don’t get to see it in the hands of another Belmont until the events of 1999 when Julius Belmont defeats the latest incarnation of Dracula and seals his castle away in a solar eclipse. Even then, he loses his memory until thirty years pass and he’s forced to do battle with Soma Cruz, an innocent transfer student who is also the reincarnation of Dracula. If the protagonist of Castlevania: Aria of Sorrow succeeds in defeating the cosmic threat that has awakened his supposed “evil” destiny, then Julius can finally lay down the Vampire Killer in peace (until the sequel Castlevania: Dawn of Sorrow , of course). If not, the game ends with Julius keeping his promise to Soma should he lose sight of his human side and let Dracula be reborn once again. In a scene that directly mirrors the beginning of Symphony , Julius enters the castle throne room, Soma throws down his wine goblet, and the screen goes black. The cycle continues anew. Julius has upheld the duty of his family name but at what cost.

The theme of tragedy getting passed down through different generations, permeating from person to person even with those who are not Belmonts, is a staple of later Castlevania games following Symphony of the Night . In some instances, pain and trauma is what jumpstarts the story moving forward. Castlevania: Curse of Darkness begins with its protagonist Hector in a direct parallel to Dracula swearing revenge on the one responsible for the murder of his wife; an ultimatum that follows him every step of the way, fuelling his rage and determination up until the penultimate moment when his goal is within reach. Yet even then he cries out, claiming this “murderous impulse” isn’t truly him—it’s the result of an outside force he himself once aided before defecting before the events of the game.

Something similar occurs in Castlevania: Lords of Shadow , an alternative reimagining of the franchise that while still a topic of division amongst most die hard fans has also seen a resurgence of popularity and reevaluation. It begins with Gabriel Belmont grieving over the death of his own wife (a trope which is unfortunately common amongst the majority of Castlevania titles). This is a wound that follows him throughout his journey until an even more painful and shattering twist regarding Marie Belmont’s demise is revealed to Gabriel later in the game.

However, there is one example from the games that stands above the rest in regards to the sort of damage which generational trauma as a result of familial duty and legacy, upheld to an almost religious degree, can inflict. So much so that even a declaration of retribution can evolve into a generational curse.

—

HUNT THE NIGHT: LEON BELMONT & THE MYTH OF FREE WILL

The Castlevania timeline didn’t always have a set beginning. An inciting incident by which all future stories, characters, and inevitable calamities could base themselves off of. Rather it changed from game to game until a definitive origin was settled in 2003 with the release of Castlevania: Lament of Innocence . For at least two games, the starting point was supposed to be with Simon Belmont, making his way through a labyrinth of dark forests and cursed towns, before finally traversing the ever changing fortress in Transylvania to defeat Dracula. He even went as far as to gather the remains and resurrect the eponymous lord of his own choice just to rid himself of another curse entirely.

Castlevania protagonists are always cursed by something. Whether it be the cause of Dracula’s influence, their own actions as seen in Lords of Shadow , a curse of the flesh like how Simon had to tackle his own ailment in Castlevania II: Simon’s Quest , or something else just as common as Dracula’s curse: the burden of honouring a family duty.

A basic yet iconic 1986 entry followed by a sequel that had potential especially with the first appearance of the now famous “Bloody Tears” track but suffered from a rather confusing and lacklustre end product. Then suddenly the starting point for the franchise timeline changed drastically. Castlevania III: Dracula’s Curse despite the numerical inclusion in its title stands as more of a prequel, detailing the exploits of the Belmont who came before Simon. Not much was altered in the grand scheme of things; the titular vampire hunter still essentially slays Dracula with the help of three other playable characters, said final boss having been driven mad and more violent than ever by humanity’s slight against him. However, not only were the methods by which Dracula is defeated changed but players were given more insight into the sort of burden placed upon the Belmont family name.

When the story of Dracula’s Curse begins, protagonist Trevor Belmont isn’t revered as a legend or hero but rather a blight on larger society who the people only turn to as a last ditch effort against rising evil. The regular god-fearing people of Wallachia now fear the Belmonts and their power (it is also implied that some still feared the barbarian-esque Simon despite his legendary status) so the family is excommunicated. Trevor is forced to enlist three other outcasts—or simply two other fighters, depending on which version of the story you examine—in order to carry out the family business. Even when the rest of the world has shunned them and there are plenty of others just as capable of stopping the forces of evil, a Belmont still has a destiny to fulfil.

Yet once a series has gone on for long enough, things within the established canon are bound to change—again and again. Whether through re-examination in order to line it up better with present day morals and sensibilities, or through good old fashioned retconning in favour of something more interesting, more thought out, or less convoluted. Other times, it’s simply because either the creator or viewers wanted it to happen. In 1997, this occurred with the release of Castlevania Legends on the GameBoy, a prequel to Dracula’s Curse that was meant to serve as the actual origin for the Belmonts, Dracula, and even his son Alucard. Instead of Trevor, the very first Belmont to fight Dracula is now his mother, Sonia Belmont, seventeen years old and already burdened with the glorious purpose of her bloodline.

Sonia is undoubtedly the protagonist of her own story with agency and drive. However, the game ends with a stark reminder of why the Belmonts have a place in the Castlevania universe. The last we see of Sonia in Legends is in the form of an epilogue where she holds her newborn child and states that one day when he’s grown, he will “be praised by all the people as a hero”. Despite her triumph over Dracula—a monumental feat itself—it seems that her purpose in the end (the purpose of most Belmonts other than to forever fight evil in fact) was to merely continue the bloodline so that descendants can carry out a promise made centuries before by another Belmont—someone that neither Simon, Trevor, Julius, or Richter ever knew.

The inevitability of sudden retcons within long-running media was not as kind to Legends as it was to Dracula’s Curse . Because of how the in-game events conflicted with subsequent entries (for example the implication that Trevor is actually the son of Alucard, thus further tying the Belmonts to Dracula through blood as well as duty), both Legends and Sonia were completely removed from the canon timeline. This is merely one reason why the next attempt at creating the definitive origin for the franchise, now a cult favourite among certain subsections of the fan community, was regarded with some animosity. However, twenty years after its release, Castlevania: Lament of Innocence is considered by many as an underrated entry. It is certainly the darker title where both the hero and villain stumble through their own hardships yet neither emerges completely victorious by the end.

The opening narration crawl of Lament of Innocence describes the lives of Leon Belmont and Mathias Cronqvist. They spend most of their lives as reflections of each other; one grows into more of a fighter while the second is coveted for his intellect and ambition. Both are valorous, honourable, and products of their own respective plights. Despite his service to the church, Leon is soon systematically stripped of everything save for the clothes on his back because he wouldn’t follow their orders blindly. While Mathias is forced to watch as an uncaring god (the very same god he serves) takes away a figure of pure virtue and love. This figure, Elisabeta Cronqvist who appears to be a splitting image of Dracula’s next deceased wife Lisa Tepes, was the last remaining tie Mathias still had to whatever bit of morality he still feels, which he eventually throws away when deciding to drag his only friend and everything he holds dear into hell alongside him.

The difference is how both men react to those personal horrors and how they let it govern their pasts, presents, and futures not just for themselves but for others who follow after the dust has supposedly settled. Two men, two best friends turned hateful enemies because of an interlinked tragedy. Not only that, but also because of their perspectives, morals, and the way they view a world that is unkind to them. Both were spurred by the death of loved ones, both used it as a conduit, or rather a catalyst for the radically opposing directions in which their choices take them and their families. Leon chooses to struggle onwards towards a world free from darkness and horror despite his pain. Mathias chooses to revel in that very same darkness and pain with a fire that would burn for aeons. In the end, one thing is absolute. A single thing the two men can agree upon as they flee down adverse paths: one of them will destroy the other.

Yet the timeline of Castlevania proves that this choice comes at a great cost for the Belmonts in particular. By the end of Lament of Innocence , Mathias has revealed himself to be the great manipulator pulling the strings behind the scenes. Due to the immense grief he felt over losing Elisabeta to a presumably common illness made untreatable because of the time period’s medical limitations (coupled with his own arrogance and narcissism), Mathias finally becomes Dracula. Dominion over death and even god by has been achieved by doing what Leon’s righteously moral mind cannot comprehend: transforming himself into an immortal creature driven by bloodlust. All he had to do was lie, cheat, and cruelly outsmart everyone else around him. That of course includes Leon as Mathias’ manipulation tactics were also the cause of the mercy killing of Sara Tarantoul, Leon’s fiance, to stop her from turning into a vampire herself. After watching his former friend escape before the sun can rise and disposing of Dracula’s constant right hand man Death, Leon finally feels his anger over such a betrayal boil over. He gives one final message to Mathias, now the new king of the vampires: “This whip and my kinsmen will destroy you someday. From this day on, the Belmont Clan will hunt the night.”

This is how Castlevania: Lament of Innocence ends. Unlike other entries like Symphony of the Night, Aria of Sorrow, or Harmony of Dissonance , there is no good, neutral, or bad ending that can be achieved if the player is aware of certain secrets and tricks. There is only one for Leon and Mathias. The inclusion of multiple endings in some Castlevania games versus a singular set ending in others may seem like a small coincidental narrative choice in conjunction with evolving gameplay, but it matters in the case of Lament of Innocence. From the moment Leon enters the castle to rescue his fiance, the wheel has already started turning and his fate is sealed. Mathias has already won and Sara, along with future Belmonts, are already doomed. And Leon’s ultimatum made in the heat of the moment would go on to have repercussions centuries later. “Hunting the night” gave the Belmonts purpose but it also burdened them with that exact purpose. While Dracula deals in curses, so does the Belmont family—a curse of duty that gets passed down throughout the bloodline.

Leon Belmont was of course never malicious or cruel like Mathias was. He never wanted to deliberately curse his family because he suffered and so should they. His choice was made out of anger and retribution. Still, it goes on to affect Simon, Sonia, Julius, and others in drastic yet different ways. Yet in the case of specific Belmonts like Trevor and Richter, we see how this family legacy can have varied consequences in far more detail through the introduction of animation and serialised writing into the Castlevania franchise.

—

SOMETHING BETTER THAN A PILE OF RUINS: TREVOR BELMONT & STRENGTH FROM LEGACY

If there’s one thing that Castlevania makes abundantly clear with its four season runtime, it is that trauma does not inherently make people better or more virtuous. We of course see this from the games with Mathias and his personal crusade against god which leads to the complete dissolvement of his closest friendship. Or with Hector and the rage he feels towards his wife’s murderer, who also happens to be his former comrade under Dracula’s employment. Even Leon’s promise to both his friend, now his most despised enemy, and future descendants can also be an example of how gut reactions to pain, grief, and betrayal can have damaging consequences in the long run. This particular dissection of trauma when it affects a survivor negatively and in almost life-altering ways while still giving them a chance at achieving their own method of healing is most apparent with the animated representation of Trevor Belmont.

At its core, the first season of Castlevania airing in July of 2017 with four episodes in total is inspired by the events of Dracula’s Curse with the following seasons taking more from Curse of Darkness along with original story elements. It begins with the brutal execution of Lisa Tepes after she is falsely accused of being a witch. Shortly afterwards, Dracula declares war on all of humanity in an explosion of grief-riddled vengeance (a declaration that is not dissimilar to Mathias’ cursing of god after Elisabeta’s admittedly more natural death). Hundreds of civilians are slaughtered in the capital city Targoviste and hoards of night creatures descend upon more townships across Wallachia.

This would be the perfect opportunity for a Belmont to stand up and fight back except there is one problem: the Belmonts have been eradicated from this world on false grounds of black magic and aiding the vampire lords instead of hunting them—much like how Lisa was slandered and paid the price with her own life.

The only Belmont left surviving is Trevor himself and his introduction does not paint him in the most optimistic or even heroic light. In the midst of being excommunicated by the church, he’s been wandering aimlessly for the past few years while languishing in whatever tavern he stumbles upon. In one particular bar Trevor finds himself in, he overhears the other patrons cursing the Belmonts and blaming them for Dracula’s siege upon humanity. He tries to stay out of it and not bring too much attention to himself until one glance at the family emblem stitched into his shirt breast is enough to ignite an all out skirmish.

Trevor hides his true identity not because he’s ashamed of it, but for his own safety and self preservation. In fact, the opinion he holds of his family is the total opposite from disdain for the sort of legacy they have saddled him with even in death. He reacts strongly to false accusations directed towards the Belmonts, angrily correcting the bar patrons by stating that his family fought monsters. However, he quickly realises he’s said too much and tries saving face by once again detaching himself from possibly being connected to the aforementioned Belmonts.

It’s only when Trevor is backed into a corner and is fresh out of snappy drunk retorts (thanks to a few hard hits to his nether regions) does he finally admit to his real lineage. As mentioned earlier, Trevor finds himself caught up in the first real brawl of the series not because of the pride he feels in himself but the immense pride he feels for his bloodline. All the while, he’s given up trying to hide what he is—a Belmont—and what he was born to do—fight fucking vampires.

Every time Trevor has the opportunity to bring up his bloodline whether in a fight or in conversation, it’s usually spoken with some bravado and weight even when he’s inebriated. However, when visiting the ruins of the Belmont ancestral home in season two and thus directly confronted with what little remains of his family legacy, Trevor loses all that previous bluster and becomes far more contemplative. He doesn’t reveal much of what it was like to actually live as a Belmont, only that it was “fine” and “no one was lonely in this house”. Even when staring up at the portrait of Leon Belmont, he says nothing and instead firmly grips the very weapons which his ancestor must have also wielded.

It’s clear that Trevor feels no shame, bitterness, or lack of respect towards his family history despite the hardships that have come with it. Still, it’s difficult for him to truly accept the duty of being a Belmont and Trevor continually struggles with it over the course of two full seasons. Upon arriving at the ruined city of Gresit which is under constant threat of night creature attacks, Trevor doesn’t seem particularly concerned with the people’s plight or with helping them. He inquires about what’s been happening by speaking with a few local merchants but it’s only in order for him to gain a better picture of the situation that Gresit finds itself in. Otherwise, he’s simply passing through on his way to another tavern, fist fight, sleeping spot, or all three. Until he puts aside his own needs for self-protection in favour of saving an elder Speaker (a fictionalised group of nomads original to the Castlevania show who have made it their mission to help less fortunate communities and pass on their histories via oral tradition) from a potential hate crime committed by two supposed men of the cloth.

This moment acts as a representation of the first chip in Trevor’s carefully maintained armour. During the bar fight, he claimed over and over again that he was a Belmont in both skill and purpose. However, Trevor hasn’t done much to prove such a proclamation. Because of his ennui and poor coping mechanisms due to lingering trauma, he’s been all talk and not a lot of action—until this point. At first he tells himself to walk away, this sort of confrontation doesn’t concern him. Then he remembers where he comes from and uses the very same family heirloom to help someone physically weaker than himself.

Yet when he accompanies the elder back to where the other Speakers have found shelter from the monsters repeatedly demanding their heads as well as future night creature attacks, Trevor’s metaphorical walls are erected back up. He won’t take any part in this eradication of humanity whether as a victim or perpetrator and especially not to stop it. The people of Wallachia made their choice in the unjust murder of Dracula’s innocent wife, they made their choice when they decided to massacre what was left of his family, and the church made their choice when they decided to fight Dracula’s armies themselves without the Belmonts. Why should he lift a finger (or whip) to save the masses?

Despite this nihilistic attitude, Trevor proves to be a poor defeatist. He still desperately wants to protect the Speakers and warns them of an oncoming pogrom planned for them. A massive hate crime fueled by superstition and facilitated by the corrupt Bishop of Gresit which will supposedly save the city from night creature ambushes (this can be interpreted as a direct allegory meant to comment on how minority groups such as Jewish and Romani communities were used as scapegoats during the Mediaeval period). However, the Speakers refuse to budge and decide to face the angry and misled crowds head-on. They instead tell Trevor to leave in their place which, in a burst of frustration, spurs him to finally act like a member of his clan should.

What follows next is one of the most defining moments of the series for Trevor, cementing his place as a Belmont. Another corrupt member of the church demands to know what he could possibly stand to gain from fighting back considering his downtrodden state and the fact that he’s entirely outnumbered. Trevor’s answer is simple: nothing. The Belmonts don’t protect everyday people for any great reward or because of any strong personal ties. They do it because it’s their duty and the right thing to do. Trevor even mirrors something which the elder Speaker told him; a family mantra that encompasses the very purpose of the Belmonts, dating back to Leon: “It’s not the dying that frightens us. It’s never having stood up and fought for you.”

Trevor’s healing journey does not end at this moment. He still has moments of hesitation where someone like Alucard has to forcibly remind him of his place as Belmont, saying he needs to choose whether he’s really the last of a long line of hunters or a drunkard. This leads to a fight sequence that nearly spans the length of an entire episode where Trevor further proves himself by taking on at least three different creatures all with varying degrees of strength, skill, and fortitude. Episode six of season two is the ideal example of not only Trevor’s determination but also his quick thinking. Moments such as him wrapping his cloak around his hand so that it doesn’t get cut while his sword slices through the throat of a minotaur or using a set of sticks to beat against an adversary when his whip is knocked away. Being a Belmont means using one’s intellect (no matter how unconventional it may seem) as well as one’s muscles.

There is also another albeit less violent instance at the start of season three where he still feels the need to hide his surname while in an unfamiliar village. Then there is the revelation that malicious stories about the Belmonts and their supposed demise still circulate amongst rural Wallachian communities. Yet despite coming from a family of old killers (a term Trevor uses before facing off against Death in the final season) his family name remains his strength and the weight of both the Vampire Killer and Morningstar whip keep him grounded rather than burden him. The Belmont name carries such weight throughout the series that by the end, there is strong consideration from Alucard of naming a new township nestled in the shadow of Dracula’s castle after that family.

Trevor deals with his pain and trauma quietly, almost numbing it with the assistance of alcohol and dodging the harder questions regarding what his family was really like. He still finds strength in remembering what the Belmonts are here for despite the tribulations that come with the family name. Hardships that continue and evolve nearly three hundred years later.

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THE THINGS THAT MAKE ME WHO I AM: RICHTER BELMONT & STRENGTH FROM LOVE

Depending on what sort of mood you might find the author of this essay in, their favourite Castlevania game will vary. At the moment, it’s a three way tie between Symphony of the Night for its artistry, Lament of Innocence for its story and characterisation, and Aria of Sorrow for its evolved gameplay. However, one personal decision remains relatively consistent no matter the mood or time of day: Richter Belmont is the author’s favourite Belmont and the inclusion of him in the latest animated adaptation Castlevania: Nocturne has only cemented that fact.

It makes sense from both a narrative and marketing standpoint as to why we’ve suddenly gone from the events of Dracula’s Curse/Curse of Darkness depicted in the previous series all the way three hundred years later to Rondo of Blood . Narratively, Richter and his companion Maria Renard already have a direct link to Alucard through the events of Symphony , which Nocturne will most likely cover and be inspired by in its second season. Marketing wise while also appealing to the largest demographic possible (even those less familiar with the games), amongst more recurring characters like Dracula and Alucard, Richter is arguably one of the most recognisable Castlevania figures right down to his design.

Certain traits and visual motifs of other Belmonts have changed drastically over the years and with each iteration. Meanwhile, from Rondo and Symphony , to Harmony of Despair and the mobile game Grimoire of Souls , to finally Nocturne and the inclusion of Richter as a playable character in the fighting game Super Smash Bros Ultimate , specific elements of Richter never waver. This includes his blue colour scheme, his tousled brown hair, and his iconic white headband. All of which carry over in the first season of Nocturne which not only expands upon Richter’s character first established in Rondo of Blood but also further examines said character.

For example, Richter’s true introduction directly following the downer cold opening is without a doubt the farest cry from Trevor’s. While Trevor’s first scene acted as a sobering depiction of what happens when physically/mentally damaging coping mechanisms mix with unacknowledged grief, Richter’s first fight gets the audience’s blood pumping, complete with a triumphant musical score and a showcase of his skill with the Vampire Killer. Richter is cocky, but not reckless. He’s sarcastic, but not sullen like Trevor was. Because of his upbringing after the death of his mother, filled with positive affirmations, he values the wellbeing of others along with their fighting experience. Yet his confidence does not overshadow his acknowledgement of the family burden. Richter is well aware of how heavy the Belmont legacy and duty can weigh upon an individual’s shoulders along with how closely it can tie itself around a person’s life and their death—a reminder as well as memory which haunts him for nine years.

When Nocturne begins, its first major fight sequence takes place between Richter’s mother Julia Belmont (an original character for the show) and the vampire Olrox, an enemy taken from Symphony of the Night now reimagined as a seductive, complex Indigenous vampire on his own path towards vengeance against the very person who took away the one he loved most in this world—just one of many thematic parallels to the first series, this time referencing Dracula’s motives and justification for his grief. Just when it seems like Julia has the upper hand thanks to her magical prowess, Olrox transforms and ends her life in a swift yet brutal manner. All of which happens right before ten-year-old Richter’s eyes.

Julia was simply doing her duty as a vampire hunter and her life as a Belmont ended the same as most of her ancestors did: in battle while fighting for the life of another. Why then did it hurt Richter most of all? Why does it haunt him well into his early adult years? And why was it seemingly more so than how Trevor’s trauma haunted him? There are two probable answers to this, one being that Richter was only a child, directly confronted by the cause for his mother’s sudden and graphic death with no way of fighting back despite being a Belmont.

In the case of Trevor, although he was a few years older than Richter when his entire family and ancestral home were burned in front of his eyes presumably by the same people they were supposed to be defending, the circumstances which followed them afterwards are vastly different. For nine years Richter was surrounded by those who loved and cared for him whereas Trevor only had himself and the hoards of average Wallachians who hated him because of superstitious rumours and the church’s condemnation. Trevor had over a decade’s worth of experience in becoming desensitised to his pain and trauma, masking it beneath self deprecation and numbing it with alcohol. He wasn’t even aware of the fact that he was a deeply sad and lonely individual until Sypha pointed it out to him.

Despite his bravado and brighter personality than his ancestor, Richter is also an incredibly sad, hurt person who suffers somewhat from tunnel vision. He obviously has empathy and wants to protect people from monsters, vampires, and the like. More so than Trevor did during his introduction before his moment of self-made rehabilitation. However, he doesn’t seem to care much about the revolution itself or what it stands for. He attends Maria’s rally meetings but he doesn’t take active part in them, opting to stay back and keep a watch out for any vampire ambushes. He admits that he doesn’t really listen to Maria’s speeches about liberty, equality, and fraternity. And in the most prominent example of his disillusionment with fighting for a larger righteous cause, when given a revolutionary’s headband, he shoves it into his pocket and mumbles about how tired he is of everything.

This could be interpreted as defeatist if Richter wasn’t already trying so hard to uphold his family duty and maintain a level head. He needs to have a sense of control and almost achieves it until Olrox so casually confronts him in the middle of a battle which Richter and his friends seemed to be winning until they’re forced to flee close behind him. When Richter runs away and emotionally breaks down the moment he’s finally alone, it isn’t because he’s weak or cowardly. On a surface level, it was due to his fear and panic over not being able to face his mother’s killer (someone who has proven to be much, much stronger and more powerful than any Belmont). Yet it was also a form of harsh admission to himself. He couldn’t maintain that aforementioned sense of control and perhaps he never will, not where he is right now at least.

It isn’t until he’s reunited with his grandfather Juste Belmont (long thought to have died, leaving Richter as the final Belmont) that this negative mindset brought on by unresolved trauma begins to shift. In many ways, Juste is another callback to what happened with Trevor. He suffered an immense tragedy in the past and has since spent his entire life drifting from tavern to tavern, avoiding his own grandson and instead leaving him in the care of people far more capable of raising him and instilling better morals within the youngest Belmont.

Other mentor-esque characters appear in Nocturne such as Tera who raised Richter alongside her biological daughter Maria. There is also Cecile, the leader of a Maroon group which Annette joins after escaping slavery. Despite their individual pains, these two women maintain the hope that humanity can be changed and the evils of the world can be defeated. Meanwhile, Juste has thoroughly lost his own hope. He reveals to Richter that “evil will always win” because of how it permeates everything and is far stronger than any Belmont, even the most magically inclined members. No matter how many Draculas, Carmillas, or Lord Ruthvens are defeated, it will always find a way to creep back to the surface whether through the upper class of France or through the very colonisation that nearly wiped out Olrox’s people or enslaved Annette’s family.

One of the first things that Juste says to Richter directly references the sheer weight of the Belmont legacy, all of which culminates within the whip itself. This can also be a reference to the Vampire Killer carrying a living soul as Leon Belmont was only able to awaken its true power by sacrificing Sara Tarantoul. The whip has both a metaphorical and literal weight which the Belmonts must come to terms with.

Yet for Richter, family is maintained not through blood ties, which can easily die out or be abandoned because of generational trauma, but through the people we find and attach ourselves to. Under the immediate threat of losing his found family, all of Richter’s pain and anguish explodes when his magical powers violently return to him in one of the most visually impressive and cathartic moments of Nocturne season one, complete with an orchestral and operatic rendition of “Divine Bloodlines” taken straight from Rondo of Blood as he ties the same headband he nearly discarded earlier around his head. Then once the dust settles and Richter is asked by Juste how he managed to tap back into that great power, he simply responds with the most obvious answer he can come up with: there are people who love him and he loves them in return.

This is reiterated when Richter is reunited with Annette and describes the same revelation when she asks how he was able to regain his magic. Not just a mental revelation but for Richter, it was a physical sensation as well. Just when he believed he had lost everything, something reminded him of all the things worth protecting in his life and all the pain he’s had to endure.

Richter finally donning his iconic white headband is symbolic of not only his decision to actively join the French Revolution but also his revelation that the love he feels for Maria, Annette, and Tera is his own righteous cause. That, to him, is worth defending just as much if not more than the concept of a centuries old curse turned legacy.

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SLAVES TO OUR FAMILIES' WISHES: CONCLUSION

Richter, both his game depiction and his recent Nocturne iteration, acts as a reflection and subversion of what a Belmont is along with what that family duty means to different members. Trevor found healing from his trauma through his duty. Richter found his healing through love. Of course Trevor loved Sypha and Alucard in his own way, but throughout the entire first series, from the moment he removed his cloak at the end of season one to standing up against Death in the finale, his driving motivation was always to preserve his family’s legacy despite his own shortcomings. The Belmonts were all but gone and Trevor had been exiled, excommunicated, and turned into a societal pariah. Had he given into despair and continued with his vagabond ways, who else would wield the Morningstar, the Vampire Killer, or any of the knowledge cultivated by previous Belmont generations?

But for Richter, family legacy is more of a nebulous concept. It gets mentioned in conversations and we see its varying effects on individuals, but even when Richter is reunited with Juste, the immediate priorities of his found family takes the place of his blood family. This, according to him, makes him a Belmont.

It is also important to consider that we are still only on the first season of Castlevania: Nocturne with season two having been renewed and in production merely a week after its initial premiere. With the reveal of Alucard as a last minute cliffhanger in the penultimate episode, it will be interesting to see how his own characterisation as well as his close tie with both the Belmonts and his own family burden will further develop especially after three hundred years within the show’s timeline. One of the biggest possibilities is that in contrast with his youthful brashness and instability that was the crux of his character in the first series, Alucard might serve as a sort of mentor figure or perhaps his own generational pain will bond him further to Richter and Maria, more so than he was in Symphony of the Night . Then there is the question of whether Richter in the midst of the apparent losses he suffered during the finale of season one will follow down the same path that his video game counterpart did.

In 2020, the author wrote another Castlevania -centric essay which detailed the visual, thematic, and aesthetical shifts of the franchise from its inception during the 1980s all the way to the 2017 adaptation through focusing on how these changes affected Alucard. By the end of that essay, it was mentioned that despite the show being renewed for at least one more season, the overall future of Castlevania remained unknown. This is still the case for now.

Though one can make educated assumptions and theories, there’s no way of knowing what sort of direction season two of Nocturne will take with its themes and characters. This is doubly true for the games themselves. Despite the anticipated releases of the Silent HIll 2 and Metal Gear Solid Delta: Snake Eater remakes, as of now Konami has not revealed any official decisions to remake, rerelease, or produce new Castlevania titles. One can hope that due to the success of both shows along with the anticipation for Silent Hill and Metal Gear Solid remakes that something new will be in store for Castlevania in the near future.

Castlevania , both its games and animation adaptations, prove that there is a place in this world for every kind of story. In the last episode of season one airing in July 2017, Alucard states what could very well be the thesis of the entire franchise: “We are all, in the end, slaves to our families’ wishes”. Yet even if we cannot escape the narrative we’ve been latched onto or, for dramatic purposes, cursed with, there are ways in which we can combat it and forge our own healing process.

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MEDIA REFERENCED

Castlevania (1986)

Castlevania II: Simon’s Quest (1987)

Castlevania III: Dracula’s Curse (1989)

Castlevania: Rondo of Blood (1993)

Castlevania Legends (1997)

Castlevania: Symphony of the Night (1997)

Castlevania: Aria of Sorrow (2003)

Castlevania: Lament of Innocence (2003)

Castlevania: Curse of Darkness (2005)

Castlevania: Lords of Shadow (2011)

Castlevania (2017—2021)

Castlevania: Nocturne (2023—)

#castlevania #castlevania netflix #castlevania nocturne #trevor belmont #richter belmont #leon belmont #castlevania symphony of the night #my writing #god its been so long since i wrote an actual essay pls be gentle with me.....

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winxwannabe · 8 days

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Winx Season 9/Reboot Leaks

Okay here's the tea: earlier today a twitter user by the name of Cataclysm_Power started posting a video they claimed was from the new Winx season/reboot. When pressed for further information, they linked to a telegram chat with what appeared to be assets from Rainbow (17 screenshots/2 videos). After some C-grade internet sleuthing, I am here to give my (worthless and possibly wrong) opinion on which ones I think are real and fake.

A note before we jump in: I'm not posting full images on my blog, because again I do think some of these are real and if the leaker is to be believed, they hacked Rainbow to get them. You can look yourself through the telegram link, or others who've posted them on the Winx Club tag. I also think the leaker themselves is scammy because they've tried charging for Miraculous leaks before. Do NOT give them any money if they ask.

Real: Bloom, Stella, and Icy's asset sheets, Bloom Full Body Pose

A lot of these leaks are 3d modelling assets, and these 3 are the ones I'm totally convinced are real.

The biggest clue of their validity is the bottom banner. All 3 sheets have them, along with the same episode code and notes in Italian. They're all also linked to the same person: Pasqualino Masciulli is Rainbow's 3D modelling supervisor, and has been with the company for at least 9 years. He's done videos on Rainbow's youtube channel as well, using his shortened first name Lino. My main point is that's way too niche for someone to fake just to make some convincing leaks, and it would make sense for the assets to be tied to him.

Likewise, there's a full-body frame post of Bloom with fucking ugliest denim leg warmers credited to a g.riccobono. This is likely Giulio Riccobono, who is listed on Linkedin Italy as a Rainbow employee.

Probably Real: Tecna's asset sheet, Bloom's detailed asset sheet

Both of these are likely real but have weird things about them that make me pause. Bloom's more detailed asset sheet is missing the name, date and episode reference on it, and the notes are in English. Tecna's is missing the bottom banner entirely, and there's some weird cutting around her head that makes it look like someone hastily made a png and stuck it on there.

Unsure: Computer File Tab, MD Concept Photos, Videos

There's a screenshot of a folder with both 2D and 3D assets of all the girls. in the files. I'm not sure if this is from a computer at Rainbow or the hacker's personal folder, so it goes in unsure. I do think most of the assets in it are real - it's low res but the eyes on the 2D sketches are so similar to the ones on Rainbow's newer images of the girls I think they have to be connected.

There are also some full body concept photos for Bloom, Aisha, and Stella. They all look pretty legit (as they're updated version of images we've already seen) but Stella's has other images for 'possible pallets' included. She's the only one with it and the images look like they came from a flash dress-up game, and it gives me pause.

Lastly, the teaser videos of Bloom are probably real based on the outfit, animation and that stupid fucking Bloom shelf being in the background, but I'm placing it in 'unsure' because of the bandicam.com logo burned into the top. If it really came from Rainbow and everything else was downloaded, there was no reason for the hacker to not get the raw file. I think it's real, but I don't know if it came from Rainbow.

Something Ain't Right: Group Shot

What gives me pause in the fully-rendered group shot (even though its shown in the computer file tab) is it shows transformation we haven't seen teased and has a 'Lorem Ipsum' placeholder text. Aisha's hair also looks like it was done with AI - the back of her wings clip through the hair, and parts of it look copy-pasted. I'm stupid, it's the end of her braids. The 'Lorem Ipsum' thing still stands, but I'm re-filing this under 'unsure.'

Probably Fake: Darcy and Damien's asset sheets

I'm showing things from here on out because I'm so convinced it's fake please let me be right. Unlike the other character sheets, the ones for Darcy and 'new character' Damien have no bottom banner, are marked as 'Winx Club Season 9' with an outdated Winx logo, and have notes written completely in English. Darcy's has a bit of 3D modelling, but it's too different from Icy's. Maybe they're super early concepts for Darcy, but Damien...go home, buddy.

You're in the Wrong Place: Rainbow Pants Girl

I'm convinced this girl is from a different show and was saved to the 'Winx Club' folder by accident. Different clothing, hair, and shading. May you end up somewhere better than this reboot, Mystery Girl.

#winx club #winx #winx reboot #winx season 9 #whoever gave Bloom DENIM LEG WARMERS turn your location on I just want to talk #winx 9

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catkyunie · 5 months

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ateez's love languages (maknae line) ♡

Sannie is a cuddle bug and as soon as he is sure that you are comfortable with him and vice versa, he’s going to make sure you know it. If there is ever an opportunity for his arms to be wrapped around you in some capacity, he’s taking it. Cooking dinner? He’s hugging you from behind. Laying on the sofa and scrolling through TikTok? He’s now your human blanket. Physical closeness and the intimacy that comes with it is something that Sannie cherishes. San is a person who loves deeply and who loves hard so being able to feel the way your body responds to his affections, hearing the quickening of your heartbeat, seeing the way the tips of your ears and cheeks flush with the prettiest shade of pink, fills him with an insatiable sense of pride. This goes hand in hand with his need for quality time as well as his want to care for you with acts of service. After a long day of work, he’d have body oils ready for a deep tissue massage, a blanket his mother made him fresh from the dryer that smells of him, and a warm drink at the ready and promptly refilled when he noticed it getting low. Going on a movie date together? He’s dusting off your seat and being mindful of picking seats that he knows aren’t too close or too far so as not to strain your eyes. Don’t mention your car needing any kind of maintenance. He’ll purposefully have the managers drive you to work the next day so he can go have the oil changed, and the gas tank filled, and even detail it for you. Any and everything that he can do to make your life easier, he’s willing to go above and beyond because he knows you would do the exact same thing for him. He is also so appreciative of the fact that you can be okay with having Wooyoung, Yeosang, or any of the members around for casual hangouts. San’s friendships mean just as much to him as his relationship with you and he loves the fact that you understand and are willing and able to accommodate his need for quality time with his members as well. Seeing how much you love his brothers and how much they adore their little sister does things for his spirit that he finds difficult to put into words. So, he expresses it with as much physical affection as either group can stomach.

Song Mingi is a person who often uses physical touch to comfort those around him. Whether it’s a reassuring hand on his hyung’s back or a quick hug to help drive a point home, he is always able and willing to be that source of solace for someone when they need it. However, it is when someone is willing to do the same for him that he melts. The comfort he feels from your hand on his neck or the weight of your head on his shoulder is something that causes Mingi’s chest to swell. It is also something that the rapper has found helps him lessen his own anxieties. More often than not if the two of you are seated beside each other, Mingi will motion for you to crawl into his lap or to even lay atop him. You are what he likes to refer to as his own ‘personal weighted blanket’. Another way that you help Mingi through his day-to-day worries is with your words of reassurance and affirmations. While he has since gained incredible confidence in himself and his abilities as both a rapper and stage performer, there are still days when the man struggles to separate what is meant to be a stage persona and the person he really is behind that mask. Thankfully, between you and his members, he is reminded that no one is like Mingi and that, despite his own perception of himself, he is loved and cherished for being that very person. On and off the stage. Quality time with his brothers and his partner also does wonders with grounding Mingi and helping him differentiate between the many hats he wears. Some of his favorite ways to relax after a long week of schedules is by sitting at home with takeout and tossing on whatever anime series he’s been putting off watching. Most of those nights are also accompanied by couples' face masks and the occasional distraction in the form of makeup. Though it isn’t something he does often, he enjoys it when he and his partner can just play around with eyeshadows and turn each other into eccentric and beautiful canvases. He particularly likes it when you teach him different makeup techniques, like which brush is the best for blending out a smokey eye or giving him a plump, dewy lip look.

Much like his dear friend San, Wooyoung is very much a fan of physical affection. In fact, out of all eight ATEEZ members, he’s probably the most forward with his physical affections. He’s never been one to shy away from hugs or kisses, and will even go out of his way to give reassuring or playful little booty pats. He’s also, by far, the most bitey of the members. While most of the nibbles are mischievous in nature and are nothing more than a little chomp, there are times when he can get carried away and leave a mark or two, much to the disdain of his members. Alas, it is always good fun. Most of what Wooyoung does is for the sake of fun at the expense of his members or partner. Wooyoung is The Brat of ATEEZ and will go out of his way to be a little menace whenever the opportunity arises. Whether it’s being sassy or pouting when he doesn’t get his way, Wooyoung naturally demands attention. With that being said, sometimes he worries if maybe it’s too much too often. While he’s never been one to dim his brightness for the sake of others, he can’t help but wonder if, at times, he’s verging on the edge of inconsiderate or maybe even annoying. This is where his need for words of affirmation comes in. Though his members, and even occasionally his partner, may pick back with him and pretend like they don’t like his forwardness or affections, they are always sure to reassure him after the fact that he is loved and adored for being just who he is, even if that is a chaotic little fox. They wouldn’t have him any other way and Wooyoung is forever grateful to have found not only a set of brothers but a lover that can and will cherish him, inside and out. How does he show this appreciation? By going out of his way to do what he can for others when and if he is able. While Wooyoung can be extremely extroverted, he is, at his core, an introvert (he is an ISTJ after all). It is the quiet moments in between when you and Wooyoung are alone and away from the prying eyes of the public that Woo really shines. This is when he can turn his persona down and really get the chance to just be Wooyoung with his members and partner. One of his favorite ways to display acts of service is by cooking for the people he loves. Whether he’s experimenting with a new dish or simply chooses to make your favorite because you’ve had a tough day at work, Woo’s love of food and his love for you is evident in the way he not only prepares it but presents it as well. And seeing the way you melt in your seat after taking a bite? It absolutely fills him with pride and adoration.

Jongho adores spoiling you and will often take you out with this intention. One of his favorite ways to do so is by popping into department stores and having cheesy dressing room montages with you, the sole purpose of hyping you up and reminding you of how stunning he finds you in literally every article of clothing, even the pieces that you purposefully pull from the rack to try and look silly. Something that initially surprised you about Jongho is how much he enjoys styling his partner. While you’re shifting through different pieces and putting together outfits, he’ll occasionally wander the store as well, perusing the racks until he finds articles of clothing that he not only knows you’ll love, but that he thinks you’d look striking in. His favorite way to style you though, by far, is with accessories. Pops of gold or chrome silver, colorful and playful necklaces, stylized bags. And once you settle on an outfit or two that you fall in love with? To the register you go, with a surprise gift usually being thrown into the mix, often in the form of a dainty chain or bracelet. He’s the type of partner to buy his someone a chain with a letter J pendant for everyday wear. Much like Yunho, the youngest of the two Ho’s intertwines their gift-giving with acts of service. Jongho would definitely be the type to purchase his partner the latest software or camera equipment if their job or hobby required it and he’d do it with no prompting whatsoever. This maknae is all about spoiling their someone and making their lives as easy as they possibly can. But, that isn’t to say that Jongho does not enjoy hearing how much you enjoy how he spoils you. Seeing as he is a person who has a difficult time expressing himself with words or physical actions, he sometimes worries that his someone will perceive his spending habits as ways to buy their love when that certainly isn’t the case. Hearing you say how much you enjoy the new bag or how much easier your work has become since purchasing some sort of software really and truly reaffirms for him that you see and understand why he does the things he does. It isn’t to purchase your love. It’s to make you smile and reassure you that you deserve to be spoiled.

#cromernet #catkyunie fic #ateez #ateez fluff #atz #atz love languages #love languages #choi san #san #song mingi #mingi #jung wooyoung #wooyoung #choi jongho #jongho

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obey-me-headquarters · 11 months

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A/B/O Scent Headcanons

Some basic info about scenting in my au: scenting is a non-sexual and non-romantic act. It's basically just claiming someone as "mine," whether that be my lover, my friend, my kid, my older brother, etc. Scenting can also have a less clear relationship than those, sometimes when you scent someone just because you have strong fond feelings for them without defining what those fond feelings are.

Different relationship claims will also smell different. If someone claimed you as an older brother, it'll smell different than then claiming someone else as a lover. So it's obvious to others what the relationship is between the scented and the scenter. (Is scenter a word?)

People scent their pets or their favorite blanket or stuffed animal.

There's also different ways to scent someone, from hugging them to rubbing their head/ruffling their hair to shoulder checking them. When people scent, they give off more pheromones in the hopes that their scent will stick to whatever they're trying to scent.

This also means that it's pretty obvious when someone is scenting someone else. Usually. Some people are very sneaky and can scent someone without the other person realizing. This is usually done by only rubbing off a small part of their scent onto another person.

None of the brothers realize, but they're basically always smelling a bit like Lucifer. This is because Lucifer is constantly scenting them as his little brothers/pups (only when he's feeling snappy and a little drunk does he scent them as his kids). It's a parental instinct, as parents will commonly constantly scent their children.

Nobody notices this (besides Diavolo, Barbatos, and Simeon, who all tease him about it). If one of the brothers are alway from the Devildom/Lucifer for a while, they'll notice that they smell slightly different.

They can't tell why or how they smell different, but it makes them anxious. They feel like something is wrong, but they can't put their finger on what. They frequently complain about how off they feel. Until they arrive back home and Lucifer is there waiting at the door to ruffle their hair and scold them for being gone so long, subtly scenting them, and they instantly relax.

Besides that, only the twins openly scent each other as everyone else is the household is too emotionally represented to admit they care about each other. Beel and Belphie always smell like each other, and it's actually difficult to determine what they smell like on their own.

Beel took it really hard when when Belphie was locked in the attic and didn't let others come into their room in fear that they'll replace Belphie's scent. That's why he didn't want you sleeping in Belphie's bed when you stayed over.

Simeon and Luke often scent each other. Simeon says that he's scenting Luke like a friend, but he's totally scenting like Luke is his kid. Luke also pretends that he isn't scenting Simeon like a big brother (or a dad).

Barbatos doesn't scent Luke, no matter how much Diavolo teases him, too. But after their last baking lesson before the first year end to the exchange program, Luke hugged Barbatos goodbye, and Barbatos instinctively scented Luke. It was in a protégé/fondess way but Barbatos was still pretty embrassed as he didn't let his instincts overpower him like that. Luckily, if Luke noticed, he didn't say anything.

Since you don't have the same sense of smell as everyone else, you can't tell whose an Omega and whose an Alpha from scent alone. You also have a harder time telling apart scents and if you've been scented.

This causes an uproar in the house when you come home selling like Simeon after your weekly tea date.

Even though Solomon can't scent you the traditional with, he makes up with it the same way he fixes all (most) of his problems: magic! He created potions that increase his scent and give you long hugs afterward to mess with the brothers. It's his way of saying, "I'm here too. Just because I'm human, it doesn't mean I don't have a claim."

The brothers looooooove to scent you. Especially since you don't even realize that you're being scented/are scented. It allows them to be little tnusdere cowards.

Sometimes, random demons at RAD like to scent you too. At first, this was an intimidation thing. To try and scare you and claim you as "their" food. But as time passed and you got a few pacts, it became a way to get street cred. Like, 3 of the 7 Lords have pacts with them, and my scent is on them!

Some demons see scenting you as a power move against the brothers. Got your shit stolen by Lord Mammon? Did Lord Beelzebub eat your lunch? Did Lord Asmodeus sleep with your s/o? Override their scent with your own on their precious human!

This is seen as a very bold and very stupid thing to do by most of the student body. It doesn't matter if you and the demon aren't publicly mated. Don't override a Lord's claim! The only brother no demon would ever override (outside of his family and a very annoying human, angel, prince, and butler) is Lucifer. No petty grievance is worth becoming Cerberus' chew toy.

When you get a fan club (clut) of your own (otherwise know as the Human Appreciation Club) and demons start to respect you, secret admirers start scenting you. You just think that the Devildom is really touchy with how many surprise hugs and shoulder checks you get. It also helps that you don't seem to mind being scented, so the other demons assume you're fine with being scented.

The brothers absolutely despise this, especially when you come home smelling like a dozen other demons and not them. But they can't say anything, or they'll reveal that they've been secretly scenting you too.

Diavolo is a big fan of scenting, but he has to be careful. Him scenting someone he isn't publicly mated to will make the tabloids go crazy. So, no random scenting.... usually.

When you're not expected to be around the demon population, he gets a little bolder and is willing and excited to try scenting you. Like when you're in the Human Realm, for example.

He gets extremely excited about it, too. You think it's a little sad how excited Diavolo gets about a hug so you don't mention how long it is. Dia is luckily that you can't tell when something is scenting because he is SO obvious.

Barbatos thinks he's above such childish courtship rituals..... yet. You arrive home after a baking lesson with Barbatos and Luke smelling like a certain butler...

Belphie sents you constantly. Whenever you two nap together, he's cuddling up to you and rubbing his scent glands against you. Even when he's asleep, he unconsciously scents you. This causes quite a bit of infighting between the brothers as you'll go to sleep smelling like Levi and wake up only smelling of Belphie.

The time Belphie doesn't completely envelop you in his scent is when you're scented by Beel. Even when he's asleep, he will add his scent with his twin's but never overpower it.

Beel scents you before and after a Fangol game. Before because he feels like he plays better when he knows that you got his scent on him. And after because he gets so happy when he wins and wants to share the win.

Satan scents and claims all alley cats in the Devildom. Shop owners and residents know that if they come across a kitty that's been claimed by the Avatar of Wrath, they better treat it right and pamper it.

So when you come strolling through smelling like Satan, store owners are quick to give you similar treatment. You're surprised to see how generous the Devildom shop owners are. They're constantly offering you free samples, even when the store doesn't typically offer them, and discounts are constantly added to your purchase.

No shop owner wants to end up like that deli owner who kicked out one of Satan's claimed cats from his store.... collective shudder.

Satan gets very embarrassed if the shop owners do thus in front of him, and he pretends to have no idea why they're acting strangely. But he doesn't tell them to stop...

Levi doesn't think he's good enough to scent you himself before his room is kinda already covered in his scent on account of how many of his favorite items are in it. So after a long gaming session or anome binge, you end up smelling like Levi anyway.

Levi immediately blushes when he notices and retreats into his room without explaining. On one hand, Levi loves that you don't seem to notice that you're scented. Because in his mind, if you knew you'll be disgusted and immediately wash his scent off. But on the other, Levi so desperately wants everyone to know that you're claimed by him.

Levi also gets insanely jealous if you come into his room smelling like anyone else. He almost canceled your gaming sections when you came in smelling like Mammon. Once, when you were scented by Lucifer, Levi was pouting in his gaming chair. He knew he couldn't compete when the eldest, so he didn't see a point in throwing a fit.

It's only when you cuddle up to his Ruri-chan body pillow that smells like him, replacing Lucifer's scent, does Levi cheer up. In his mind, you chose him over Lucifer, even if it wasn't a conscious choice.

Asmo is incredibly shameless when it comes to scenting you. The moment he sees you, he's wrapping you in a hug and nuzzling unto your neck. He also pouts if you wash off his scent, even if you don't know what you're doing. He's the one out likely to spill the beans and tell you about scenting. His brothers will have to warn him about punishments for him, not to spill.

He likes to think of you not knowing like it's a little game, how bold can he be before you ask him what's he's doing? How long before you catch on?

When you come home smelling like some random demon who overrides his scent, he's pissed. His envy rivals Levi's and his rage rivals Satan's. How dare some no name, low level demon scum overscent his claim!!

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smoochhyuka · 6 months

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Munch!Kai tasting heaven for the first time

He could not believe you would doubt yourself so much, especially since all he thinks about at night are your soft thighs wrapped around his head.

○o。content warnings! nsfw, soft dom!Hyuka, perv!hyuka, fem!reader, cunnilingus, breastplay, mention of asphyxiation at the end, he is head over heels for you, a little angsty at the start but nothing too heavy and it gets resolved quickly (mention of dieting, calories, weight loss and body image issues), implied to be chubby (you can read as plus-size or in a 'not-fitting-kbs' way), tummy lover hyuka, kinda long build-up this is purely self indulgent ToT

It has been raining the whole day and has only gotten worse throughout the evening. Since you live at the very top of your apartment complex, the thick droplets can not only be heard from the windows but also from the ceiling, creating a calming brown noise effect which you are using to your advantage. Today was a free day for you and your boyfriend was able to wrap up practice a lot earlier than expected and paying you a surprise visit. You lit up all the candles you own, used the coziest pillows and blankets to cuddle up in and cranked up the heating. You decided to put on a cute pair of very short shorts in your favorite color, fluffy white socks and a thin white tank top without a bra, in hopes that Kai would at least react to your uncharacteristically revealing outfit. To your disappointment, he did not even glance down at your body.

Kai asked to be your boyfriend just after a couple of dates. Due to his busy schedule, meeting each other turned out to be difficult, causing you to mostly meet in the evening or at night, most of the time having sleepovers at your place. They are innocent, too innocent to your liking. You watch a movie, sit together and play games or just lie in bed and talk about anything. It is wonderful, of course, you have not met a man as attentive, caring, earnest and passionate as him. You know he loves you, he has told you accidentally and honestly a little prematurely on your first month anniversary date and has not stopped declaring his sincere feelings for you ever since, but you are a worried if your boyfriend is sexually interested in you. He breaks every kiss that turns hot, never allows his hands to wander below your hips or make any suggestive comments. You are unsure what the cause might be, and you are debating on whether you should ask, since it ultimately could just be too soon for him and you do not want to risk scaring him away by coming off too strong. But the mind does not always work rationally, you are searching the fault on you. Do you need to dress more sexy, since you both are usually in your lounge wear when you see each other? Are you not cute enough, because of your blunt sense of humor? Are you... not thin enough to his liking?

A bowl of popcorn and a pack of his favorite gummies are between you, which kind of stops you from cuddling up to him too much. Kai put on a random anime that he said you must see, snacking on the gummies. You try your best to hide your frustration, concentrating on the episode and trying to memorize the names of the characters. You do not notice him picking up a few pieces of popcorn until they are right in your face, "Ahhhh", Kai hums at you, gesturing you to eat said snack. You turn your head away, still not really looking at him, "thank you, but it doesn't fit into my calories, I had dinner already.", you reply. His playful smile falters, his brows furrow. Since you did not look away from the laptop, he pauses the anime, "What do you mean, 'calories'?". You look at him with big eyes, "I decided to go on a diet.", you state matter-of-fact. He is visibly upset, an angry pout on his face, confusion and worry in his eyes. Why would you go on a diet, do you not know how beautiful you are? He knows how easily it can spiral out of control, it hurts him to think that you would find a diet necessary. "Why would you?", he asks rather harshly, having a hard time hiding his disapproval. You are rather taken aback, since you did not think he would react this way. You figured he would not really react at all. It is not only common for idols to diet regularly but also for normal citizens to pick up that habit, you were absolutely not prepared to see him this agitated. As you are unsure on what to rebuttal, Kai speaks up again, "Of course you are free to do what you want, but I want you to know that I disagree. I want you to be happy and healthy, eating good food." There is a lot more he would want to say to you, but ultimately he thinks it is not his place to tell you what to do, especially not so early in the relationship, "You should also know that you are the most gorgeous woman I have ever seen.", he whispers before turning the anime back on, not without stealing a glance at your sweet body, which you took notice of. For a while, you sit quietly next to one another, no one really paying attention to the screen, but being lost in their own thoughts. Kais quiet confession got your heart racing, he does compliment you more than enough, but they are never as intense as this one. Usually, he calls you cute or pretty between grins and giggles, he would shyly look away, sometimes poke your stomach to distract you from said comment. This time, he not only looked you in the eyes with a firm expression, even if it was just for a split second, you could see lust in his face after he dared to finally take a closer look at the outline of your nipples in the slightly see-through top, your small belly button, your lush thighs that you pressed together for a more comfortable position. You decide, it is time to adress your concerns.

"I thought you might prefer it if I lost a few kilos", you admit, the episode still running, your boyfriends body tensing up, "Kai, do you think I am sexy?" Even though you are an outspoken person, asking him this is quite embarrassing. Having said that out loud, you feel like a fool. He pauses, his hand hovering over the space button for a while, before leaning fully back and looking you in the eyes again with that intense stare. His eyes fall lower, you grow a little insecure under his gaze, trying to pull down you shorts a little, adjusting the straps of your top, making your tits jiggle deliciously. He hisses quietly upon seeing that, you almost did not notice. The tension thickens, "I...", your boyfriend starts, pausing again to think, "That is a very unexpected question, at least from my perspective." You furrow your brows, tilting your head to the side. You have a habit of blowing a little air in you cheeks and pouting when you do that, seeing that confused and innocent expression in addition to those little clothes that do not leave a lot to the imagination gets Kais brain all fuzzy. "I think about you every night.", he admits, "It has been so difficult not to initiate anything." He was able to surprise you again this evening, your mind goes blank. Have you actually been this wrong? Kai carefully takes the snacks and the laptop and puts them on the floor, he scoots over to you and wraps a long arm around your shoulders, whispering into your ear, "Don't tell me you put this on to seduce me. I have been trying so hard to be a gentleman for you." His voice sends shivers down your spine, you close your eyes, savoring the sensation of his hot breath in your ear. "Tell me, baby, is there something you want us to do tonight?" He is circling your shoulder with his index finger. With his long, slender index finger. You knew your boyfriend was more than the cute and innocent maknae fans know him as, you most definitely have seen his performances, but for him to have a dominant side like this is something you hoped for, but not necessarily required him to have. "Or do you just want to lay back and let me handle it? I probably should make it up to you, for making you worry like this.", he places a few hesitant kisses below your ear, you just now notice the small tremble in his hands, "You completely misunderstood, though." His voice exuding confidence, his body language telling a different story. His eyes are closed shut, he is practically hiding his blush in your neck. You have not really said anything, making his heart pound hard in his chest. He thought about this moment a lot, everytime being more erotic, more experimental, dirtier. He realizes your first time is not going to be a two hour long session of you both trying out your naughtiest fantasies, instead, it is going to be a lot more emotional than his wet dreams allowed. He is feeling a form of performance pressure that did not even cross his mind accidentally.

"A moment ago...", you whisper, pulling him out of his head, "you said you think about me every night. What is it that you think about?" You open your eyes, big eyes searching for his. He looks up timidly, you smile at his pink cheeks.

Bondage, toys, sensory play, wax play, shower sex, kitchen sex, lingerie, anal... what did he not think about? There is only one reoccurring theme in his wild imagination about you.

"I think about eating you out.", he answers bashfully, laughing awkwardly because of his bad habit to smile away his anxiety. Hearing him say that is sending a jolt right to your core, sinful images flash in front of your inner eyes. Your heart rate increases, unsure on how it could even beat any faster. Your boyfriend picks up on your rising body temperature, your glossy eyes and your breathing picking up. "I-", you stutter, "Please." You have lost your words. Your big and strong boyfriend has you in a tight grip and just admitted that he wants to eat you out in a way that is sexy and still uniquely cute to him, mentally you slip away, you brain is blank, you can only feel your skin tingling at every spot you are touching him. He leans forward and kisses you softly, his pink velvety lips feel like small pillows. Without breaking the kiss, he sits in front of you and presses you down into the pillows, a little bit more forceful than intended. His dick has been slightly erect since the moment he saw you this evening, but by now it has grown to his full size. You take notice of the bulge, reaching out, but Kai catches your hand and pins it above your head. He grins at you, "I am going to take off your top, is that okay?" You nod, profusely. He giggles at your eagerness, even when he is hovering above you, he manages to be sweet. His warm hands find your belly, he holds you by your waist and massages you with his thumbs. You whine, growing hot and bothered by his pace, making his cock twitch, he groans and leans forward to place some more kisses on your tummy. You squirm everytime his lips get lower to your heat, everytime you do he nibbles at the spot. He kisses a wet trail up your body, until he has reached the hem of your shirt. Fingers slipping underneath it and pulling it above your head, exposing your chest and your hardened nipples. For a brief moment Kai gets shy, seeing you this exposed is a sight that he has been dreaming so long of. His hands trail slowly back down to your mounds to cup them gently, but not without running them over your face and stopping just for a moment to caress your lips.

"You are so beautiful", he whispers, you tilt your head to the side to escape his gaze, slightly embarrassed. "I love you.", Kai starts grinning after your proclamation, leaning forward again but this time to catch your right bud between his lips, applying pressure to the other one with his thumb. You sigh at the feeling, the slight tingle that creeps through your entire body. Making sure not to apply too much of his body weight onto you, he delicately sucks and licks on your chest, only experimentally biting you a few times with his front teeth, which you seem to enjoy. He could listen to you small sighs, heavy breathing and occasional whines forever, but you both have other plans for this rainy evening.

Wet and passionate are the kisses that trail down to the hem of your shorts, his breathing heightening after every peck. His hands follow suit, as he is know toying with them, his fingers trembling slightly just like a moment ago. Trying to ease his nervosity, you lay one of your smaller hands on top of his, looking into his eyes. After one last, deep breath, he pulls down your shorts and underwear, exposing you fully to him. His cheeks turn into a sweet, deep red. "It is a little unfair", you start teasing him, breaking eye contact yet again, "that I am the only one naked right now." Kai laughs awkwardly as a response, short-circuiting, mumbling a small 'sorry' before shakily pulling his own tank above his head, exposing his flushed chest. The sight of your boyfriend, covered in blush, kneeling between your naked legs is a sight that you will not able to forget for quite some time. Despite his clear apprehensiveness, Kai is moving his position a lot further down the bed, making sure his head is right above your glistening pussy when he leans back down. The smell of your heat is hitting him before he can even realize how close he is to you, he would not necessarily know how to describe it, just that it is intensely erotic. You pull your knees closer to you chest, effectively spreading your lips further open and allowing him to now see your two holes.

Not knowing what to do with his arms, he uses the left one to support himself, and the other one to grabs you by your hip. He opts to start with a small peck next to your cunt, earning him another whine, before wetting his lips with his tongue and placing a kiss rather centrally on the sensitive nerves. His nose brushes your clit, "Kai.", you breath heavily. Now curious about you taste, he sticks out his tongue to trail upwards, just barely missing the sensitive bundle of nerves, which placement he did take notice of. Now circling it, applying a little bit more pressure, you start moaning for him. His head starts to feel dizzy, your smell, taste and voice occupying his senses. Trying to swallow more of your juices he starts sucking on your clit, getting you to cry out and press your thighs together around his head, restricting his breathing slightly. Kai could have never imagined how tranquilizing this whole experience could have been. Not being able to move his head a lot, he goes back to licking between your folds, slurping off the never-ending flow of juice that you produce. Your boyfriend is eager to find what works the best for you, trying out different patterns with his tongue and sucking on different nerves, taking note of every little noise that you make for him. He carefully sticks his tongue into your hole, and just through imagining his cock entering the textured and gummy walls, he can not help himself but to use his left hand to pull out his angry red dick and sloppily pumping it. You are too focused on the overwhelming pleasure you feel to notice, holding tightly onto the stuffed animal Kai has gave you on your first date. "I am so so close.", you exclaim, sounding slurred. "Come on my face baby.", he quickly rebuttals, barely lifting his mouth from your pussy to say it. Since you seemed to like it when he sucks on your clit, he does it again and you cry out loudly. It does not take long for that tight knot in your core to burst, you come violently, pressing down even harder on his head, cutting off most of his air, leaving him to only breath in your smell. That sensation getting him to cum just a few moments after you, while you still twitch, squirm and rub against his tongue trying to get down from the high. His thick, opaque cum covering your bedsheets and his hand, slow pumps to get out the last droplets. Both of your heartbeats start to normalize, you release your boyfriend from the headlock and let your legs hang. The sudden hit of air overwhelming him, but after a few breaths he is able to sit up straight, scoot forward again and plop down next to you.

You immediately turn over to him and swing your legs around his hips, rather harshly coming in contact with his --to your surprise-- flaccid and naked dick. He shrieks, you sit up in concern and cup his cheeks. "Sorry!", you blurt out, without necessarily understanding what just happened. His furrowed brows relax again, his pained expression turning into amusement. "It is just so sensitive after coming, that's all.", he tells you honestly, "I couldn't help myself". You start smirking, "I guess that answers my question from earlier.", you say, after seeing his hand that is still glistening from the white coat. He follows your eyes and immediately rolls out of bed, "I get that cleaned up and then we fall asleep cuddling." You just nod, watching him in awe, pulling up his pants back over his butt and disappearing in your bathroom.

#sorry for the goofy ass ending but i couldnt help myself #everyone needs a kai to fuck away your insecurities #hueningkai hard hours #hueningkai hard thoughts #txt smut #hueningkai x reader #smoochwrites

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oikasugayama · 8 months

Text

I wrote this for myself because it's my birthday and I love Ango. Yes, I made myself a little flustered with this. I love this animated man.

ango fluff and smut (: click here to read on ao3

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"Ms. [Y/N], can I have a brief word with you in my office?"

You look up from your work slowly, letting your eyes trail up the tall, slim frame of the man standing before you.

"Of course Mr. Sakaguchi, but may I ask what we'll be discussing?" you ask, standing and brushing your skirt flat. He watches you closely but you don't sense any malice.

"It's about your time off request." Mr. Sakaguchi turns on his heel and walks down the hall to his office. You aren't exactly his secretary, and he isn't exactly your boss, but given that you work on his contracts he does have say in your schedule, so to any eavesdroppers or nosy workers in the building it makes sense that he'd ask you to his office regarding your schedule.

To you, though, it doesn't make sense. You could see though his lie a million miles away.

As soon as his office door closes behind you, you tell him as much.

"My time off request was the best excuse you could come up with?" you ask mischievously, following him across the room to his desk. "That's a silly excuse. If you wanted some alone time with me, you could have just said so." He sits in his executive-style chair, and you perch yourself on the corner of his desk, crossing one leg over the other, leaning back on your hand to display yourself in front of him.

He reaches out instinctively to pet your thigh, letting his fingers prod against the hem of your skirt.

"Ms. [Y/N]," he says in a chiding tone that you know is him being playful. "You wrote in your request notes, and I quote--" he looks to his computer and reads, "--'It's my birthday and my birthday wish is to not work on my birthday and also for my boyfriend to spend the night with me for my birthday.'"

"It's a very reasonable request," you say innocently. "Did I mention that my birthday is tomorrow?" You smile. Mr. Sakaguchi looks at you, feigning being unamused.

"Yes, I got the message. You do know that if for some reason I hadn't been able to approve your request, it would have gone to the floor manager? What would he have thought about your unprofessionalism?"

"I can't pretend that's the most unprofessional thing I've said or done in this office," you say, laying your hand on his and urging it higher up your thigh. "Or should I say, not the most unprofessional thing we've done in this office, Ango?"

You watch as his tongue pokes out just slightly to wet his lips as he briefly thinks of what to say.

"After hours is one thing. Things that leave paper trails are another. You didn't actually say anything wrong so I'm not scolding you--"

"--Not that you could if you tried--"

"--but please next time you want my attention just say so. You don't have to send a form to ask me to spend the night with you."

"I know," you say softly, reaching out to tame a strand of hair trying to escape his typical pushed-back style. "But I wasn't going to let you forget this one. It's my first birthday since we've started dating and I'm very excited about it. I want you to come over after work tonight, and I want to wake up to you in the morning, and I want to spend the whole day with you."

"So you want me to take the day off as well?"

"Duh," you say, giggling after. "And you had two weeks to put that together because I submitted that time off request with plenty of notice."

He rolls his eyes and reaches out for you, wrapping his arms around your hips and pulling you toward him until you have no choice but to slide yourself off the desk and onto his lap.

"Luckily your heavy-handedness had the intended effect. I'll be seeing you tonight."

"Promptly at 5:30?" you ask, bringing up a contentious point between yourself and your workaholic partner.

"Promptly," he starts, but looks away from you--his tell-tale sign of lying and/or saying something he knows you won't be happy about. "at 6:30. I have a little bit I'll have to do to prepare for missing work tomorrow, and I want to stop at the store before going to your apartment." You make a face somewhere between a frown and a pout, prompting him to say, "I promise I'll make it up to you."

"You better," you mumble, leaning in to kiss him. He responds as he always does, kissing back enthusiastically as if your kisses are the air he breathes, while also greedily holding you in place by his large hands splayed across whatever part of your body he can grab--now being just barely above your ass with his right hand and the middle of your upper back with his left hand.

Two sharp knocks on his office door make you break the kiss with a sigh and the roll of your eyes. His actual secretary is asking permission to open the door--a code they worked out long ago before you and Ango used it to your advantage to have some alone time behind closed doors at the office.

You climb out of his lap and straighten your skirt, turning to him afterwards to make sure your lipstick--albeit a very subtle shade--hasn't accidentally transferred onto his mouth. He knows exactly what you're looking for and tilts his head toward you, making a kissy face then smiling closed-mouth, then making his neutral face.

"All good," you say, nodding. "See you tonight."

His secretary knocks quickly twice more, and you quickly cross the room to open the door.

"Sorry," you say to her, giving your best business-apologetic performance. "We were working out my schedule. He's free now."

She doesn't give you a second glance as you walk past her and back to your desk. If she's ever suspected a thing between you and her boss, she's never let on.

When Ango gets to your apartment at 6:25 that evening, the first thing he asks after giving you a brief kiss is “have you eaten dinner yet?”

“No,” you tell him. “I wanted to wait until you got here to ask what you wanted.”

“Good. Go relax. I’ll make dinner.”

A wide smile works across your face and you reach up on your tiptoes to give him another kiss. Instead of going to the living room or your bedroom like he expected, you sit at the breakfast bar, giving yourself the perfect view of Ango as he begins unpacking the things he picked up before coming over.

“That’s where you’re going to relax?” he asks, giving you an eyebrow-raised look.

“It’s the best seat in the house,” you say, flashing your best cutesy smile. “I can’t miss seeing you cook.” You lean your head on your hand with your elbow on the counter and pout. “It’s so hot.”

Ango’s face has never been able to hide when he’s flustered. Now his eyes widen, his cheeks redden, and he turns away from you.

“I’m just cooking, there’s nothing hot about it.” He says, unbuttoning his suit jacket and shrugging it off.

“Ugh, that’s one of my favorite parts,” you sigh, kicking your feet a little under your chair. “And now you’re gonna roll your sleeves up and it’s gonna be so hot.”

“Stop,” he whines, shoulders slumping. You bite your lip and try to get a glimpse of his face when he goes to the door to hang up his coat. Bright red, as you suspected. “You’re trying to work me up on purpose.”

“Of course I am,” you say in your overly sweet voice reserved purely for teasing your boyfriend. “It’s my birthday tomorrow and I’ve been a very good girl, so I’ve got all sorts of mischief I need to get out of my system before I turn 24.”

“I seem to recall several instances in which you were not a good girl,” Ango says, rolling his sleeves up just as you’d predicted. He seems to do it with an extra flourish in the flick of his wrist, putting on a bit of a show for you as he exposes his arms. One of your favorite words to call him--slutty-- is on the tip of your tongue begging to come out but he speaks before you can get it out, shocking you so thoroughly that you don’t speak for several minutes after.

“I prefer dessert after dinner, so if you could wait to be my brat until we’ve eaten, I would appreciate it.”

He never exaggerates when he says he’ll eat you for dessert. His glasses are off and his face is buried completely in your cunt, your wetness smearing all over his nose, his cheeks, his mouth, his chin. His tongue works vicious circles around your clit, as he stares up at you, demanding beforehand that you watch him, that you know who works you up so much that you become a babbling mess, unable to say even the few syllables of his name cohesively. His long, slender fingers pressing relentlessly against your g-spot make it all the more overwhelming, though he barely has to move his fingers because your twitching and squirming does most of that work for him.

He doesn’t stop until you cum twice from his tongue and fingers alone, then he finally stops, wipes his face sloppily on his arm and scoots up to you.

“Open,” he demands, and you open your mouth, sticking your tongue out for his fingers to land on and he slides them in, letting you taste yourself and clean him off at the same time. “Good girl.”

When you stop sucking, he pulls his fingers out and wipes your spit off on the leg of his pants. You look down and immediately see the straining of his dick against the inside of his pants. He always gets hard from eating you out, and it never fails to turn you on more. The way your bodies react to each other is intoxicating, and you want nothing more right now than to choke on his cock.

“My turn?” he asks, knowing exactly what you’re thinking given where you’re staring. You nod quickly and reach for his belt, but he stops you.

“Watch.”

He waits until you’re still, then sitting on his knees so you have the perfect view he slowly unbuckles his belt, pulling it all the way off and laying it on the bed rather than dropping it to the floor. Your heart flutters, hoping that means what you think it does.

His long fingers deftly unbutton his pants and unzip them, pushing them down just enough so his dick through his underwear has a bit of room to shift and try to move upwards. He hisses at the stimulation as he palms over it, letting it move and guiding it until you can see the head of it nearly poking out of the top of his waistband.

“You want it so bad, don’t you?” he asks, licking his lips. You nod frantically, turning and moving around until you can settle yourself on your stomach right in front of him. He finally pulls his briefs down, hissing at the drag of the fabric down his shaft. “Go on, then.”

You hook your fingers under his waistband and pull his briefs down further, letting his balls out as well. You mouth down the side of his shaft, getting it covered in your spit and teasing him at the same time. You wrap one hand around the base of his shaft to hold him in place while the tip of your tongue teases along the shape of his tip, tracing each curve and the dip at the top. His fingers thread into your hair, and you know with just a bit more teasing he’ll force your head down and make both of you moan, but you move in before he has to.

You let his cock into your mouth, greedily accepting every long inch of him until your nose is being tickled by his pubes. He moans a pathetic whine of your name, and you bob your head shallowly, keeping as much of him in your mouth as possible.

“I still, ahh--” he whines. “I still can’t believe-- you can-- do that--” His breathing is unsteady and his voice trembles. As much as you love when he takes charge of you, you love making him pathetic at your touch even more.

You gently hold his balls in your free hand and tease your fingers over them lightly, feeling them twitch as he gets more and more worked up as you keep sucking, keep letting the tip of his cock bump the back of your throat, keep playing with his balls. His fingers tighten in your hair and he pulls, making your mouth slide toward the head of his cock.

“I’m not cumming in your mouth,” he says, trying his best to sound assertive again. “Don’t try it.”

You look up at him, and his eyes are screwed tightly shut, his teeth visible where he bites into his lip as you suckle, wiggling your tongue back and forth under him, trying your best to call his bluff. He only lets you play with him a little while longer before he’s gently cupping your jaw with one hand, signaling to you to stop. You obey, pulling back and watching cross-eyed as his dick leaves your mouth with a long string of spit connecting it to your mouth.

“You’re so good for me,” he says, petting your cheek. “And since it’s your birthday, you decide how we continue.” He lets go of your cheek and your hair, reaching up to unbutton the white shirt he still wears. You watch, licking your lips as his chest and stomach is slowly exposed. “I’m going to fuck you,” he says. “I’m going to make you forget your name. Do you want to be tied up? Do you want to ride me? Do you want to be under me so you can’t see anything but me?”

After his shirt is gone and tossed to the floor, he gets up, taking off the rest of his clothes.

“Answer me,” he demands, standing at the side of the bed while you sit up form your laying position.

“All of it?” you ask, and he smirks.

“I knew you’d say that.”

By the time you finished and Ango was satisfied that he’d made you forget your name and everything else that wasn’t him, it was nearing midnight. He ran a bath for the both of you and kept his phone nearby while you were in it just so he could be the first one to tell you happy birthday as the clock struck 12.

In the morning he woke you up with breakfast in bed, and the entire day he spoiled you, giving in to your every wish. You went everywhere you wanted to go, holding his hand the whole way, anyone who could potentially see you be damned. He had a very hard time saying no to you on a regular day, and today it was simply impossible.

#ango x reader #ango smut #bsd ango #ango sakaguchi #ango headcanons #bsd smut #bungo stray dogs fan art #bungo stray dogs x reader #bsd x you

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