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ticklishraspberries · 2 years

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Shiver With Anticipation (Inej/Kaz)

Summary: As the couple grows more comfortable with physical affection, Inej finds out that Kaz is ticklish. Instead of striking then and there, she promises to remember that information for later, putting him on edge. (So...I accidentally deleted this fic off my blog, lmfao. Still not sure how, must have been in a 2am haze or something. Anyway, this was originally written for Day #1 of @august-anon‘s TickleTober prompts.)

Slowly but surely, Kaz and Inej were growing used to physical touch. It started with holding hands, first with his gloves, and then without. The first time they hugged, it had ended in mutual panic, but they had since gotten the hang of that, too. They even managed to kiss on occasion, but it was saved only for special moments, like when Inej first docked her ship back in Ketterdam after a few months away, or when she was about to set off to sea once again.

They could share a bed as long as they used separate blankets. Sometimes they woke up cuddled together, and most times, it didn’t put their mornings off to a bad start.

Inej’s issue was more with being touched, but she didn’t mind doing the touching. It made her feel in control of the situation. A reminder of her freedom. Kaz was the opposite; if someone else was touching him, he could feel the heat of their skin, the movement of their body, their pulse. Proof of life.

And so, Kaz kept his hands to himself and offered himself up for Inej to initiate touch, as long as he knew what she planned to do. First, she wanted to play with his hair, which he had enjoyed immensely. Then, she tried pressing soft kisses to each of his knuckles, bruised after a fight. It had been such a tender moment, Kaz could have cried.

Before her last departure, she had asked to try massaging his shoulders.

“You always seem so tense,” she explained. “I thought it could help.”

Although his pride wasn’t thrilled at accepting the offer, he found that it was hard to say no to Inej, especially when she had to be so goddamn kind about everything. Of course she would ask permission to help relieve some of his pain. That was just the kind of girl she was, and it was one of the many qualities that made him fall for her in the first place.

So, he had sat on the edge of his bed and let her kneel behind him, her hands coming to rest on his shoulders. Her thumbs pressed little circles into the muscle, and Kaz couldn’t help the small sound of pleasure that left him.

“Is this alright?” Inej asked.

He nodded. “I thought you said you’d never done this before.”

“Well, I may or may not have asked Nina for some pointers,” she replied.

As she worked the knots out of his back, he found himself relaxing into her touch more and more. He shut his eyes and listened to her hum a tune he didn’t recognize. It wasn’t until her hands moved up towards his neck that he felt goosebumps rise on his skin, but it wasn’t from a flashback. No, there was no nausea or panic, only the way that his nerves suddenly seemed on high alert, and the strange urge to…smile?

Well, shit. He thought he’d grown out of that. No one had roughhoused with him in such a way since Jordie died, and he had assumed that after a decade of being stony-faced and constantly pissed off that being ticklish had somehow escaped him.

Apparently not all weaknesses could be tackled so easily.

Inej’s fingers accidentally brushed against the side of his neck and sent him flinching away.

“Are you alright?” she asked, retracting her hands immediately. “I’m sorry, did I do something wrong?”

He shook his head. “No, no, you’re fine. Just wasn’t expecting it.”

Inej knew pretty much all of his secrets, but there was something so embarrassing about telling her the truth. He knew she wouldn’t tease him too harshly, and she definitely wouldn’t attempt to tickle him any further without asking, but it just felt vulnerable and childish to admit. His ears burned at the thought, and he prayed to the Saints he didn’t believe in that the blush would go unnoticed.

“Do you want me to stop?” Inej asked.

He turned to look at her, with her big, worried eyes and cursed himself for being entirely susceptible to the kicked-puppy expression. “No, you can continue if you’d like.”

She perked up, and it made his heart soar to know he had caused that happiness. He managed to keep still for a bit as she started to massage once again, but his nerves were alert and Inej’s touch was becoming far too ticklish for him to ignore. She had moved from his shoulders to his upper back, and her thumbs kneading into the muscle made him feel as though fizzy bubbles of champagne were running through his veins.

“The point of a massage is to be relaxed, you know,” she said. “If you aren’t enjoying this, I can stop. I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”

Kaz sighed. “It’s not that I’m uncomfortable. I just…”

Inej scooted over so that she sat beside him rather than behind him. She didn’t speak, didn’t try to pry his words from his mouth sooner than he was ready to speak them. She just sat, waiting. Sometimes, the things that they tried just didn’t work out. They never shamed one another for needing a break or putting an end to it entirely. However, not speaking up in those moments was something that both he and Inej took very seriously. The last thing they wanted was to upset the other, to send Kaz back to the water, or Inej back to the brothel.

Yes, Kaz was a cheat and a liar and a pretty big asshole, but ever since he let his walls come down around Inej for the first time, he found it hard to put them back up. If Inej thought he was hiding his discomfort, he would feel as though he was betraying her trust.

“Don’t laugh,” he finally said. “And if you tell anyone about this, I will take the ship back.” It was a thinly veiled threat, but she got the message anyway.

Inej raised her eyebrows at the comment, but the words that followed were gentle. “I would never laugh at you.”

“You were tickling me,” he said, trying to ignore how warm his ears had become.

Inej didn’t laugh, although he swore that the corners of her lips tugged upward for just a second. “And so instead of telling me to stop, you were just going to hold your breath and try to ignore it?” she asked, voice thick with amusement.

Well, it sounded pretty stupid when she put it like that. “I didn’t want to interrupt you. You seemed to be enjoying yourself.”

She did laugh then, giving a fond shake of her head. “You know you can always ask me to stop.”

“I know.”

“Well, maybe next time I’m back from sea, I can find out where else you’re ticklish,” she said.

“Okay,” Kaz replied after a moment. Perhaps love had really made him an idiot.

Inej looked at him, clearly surprised that he had agreed to her half-joking suggestion.

The rest of their night went by without incident. They simply fell asleep beside each other, just far enough apart on the small mattress to be barely touching, only their fingers were lazily interlaced.

In the morning, Inej quickly pecked his lips before getting onto The Wraith and sailing off, leaving him on the dock like a wife watching her husband go off to war.

***

Inej was due to come home tomorrow, and the anticipation was eating Kaz alive. Yes, he was excited to see her. He was excited to kiss her, to see her smiling face. He had missed her terribly, all of the Dregs had, but he hadn’t forgotten her proposition in the month she had been gone.

It seemed that the universe was taunting him with it, as he watched Jesper squeeze Wylan’s knees beneath the table, or Nina prod at Matthias when they thought no one else was watching.

He had even tried to replicate the feeling on himself, running gloved fingers down the expanse of his own side, but it didn’t give that same goosebump-inducing sensation.

As Kaz tried to sleep, his mind was reeling. What if he hated it? What if it reminded him too much of Jordie, and sent him into a panic? What if he wasn’t half as sensitive as he thought, and Inej was disappointed? Or, what if he was twice as sensitive as he thought, and couldn’t handle it?

He felt ridiculous. He was the leader of the Dregs, Dirtyhands, the Bastard of the fucking Barrel and he was losing rest over a little tickling. When he finally willed his brain to shut up, he fell asleep and dreamed of Inej with mischief glinting in her eyes and a smirk curled on her lips.

The Slat was all aflutter the next morning, everyone buzzing in excitement for Inej’s return. Kaz, along with Jesper, Wylan, and Nina made their way to the docks when the sun hung high above the streets of Ketterdam.

It was a joyful reunion, as usual. Inej departed her ship with a glow about her, all the confidence and bravery of Captain Ghafa not a wavering mask, just who she truly was. She hugged Nina first, then Wylan, then Jesper, and then she reached Kaz, and her smile grew just a little wider.

“Hi,” she said.

“Hi,” he replied.

She gave him a quick kiss, which still never failed to surprise their friends, and they were off to spend the day celebrating her return with drinks and probably a bit of crime.

Kaz found himself watching her hands all day: The way that she held her glass, fingers curled, almost poised in a claw. How she picked a lock, the precision and speed with which she moved. She would surely be the death of him, but he would be alright with that fate.

As the festivities died down, Kaz retired to his room. Usually, Inej spent her first night back in Ketterdam with Wylan and Jesper, so he began changing into his bedclothes and was startled when Inej’s voice came from his window.

“Please, don’t stop on my behalf. You never had a problem being half-naked in front of me before,” she teased.

Kaz’s ears turned pink. “I thought you’d be staying at Wylan’s tonight.”

Inej shrugged. “I can, if you want me to.”

He shook his head. “Stay, please.”

She didn’t need to be told twice.

As he finished changing, he handed Inej some clothes as well, respectfully averting his gaze to the papers on his desk as she put on the much-too-big clothing. The sight of her nearly swimming in his shirt made him smile.

“How was your trip?” he asked, placing his cane beside the bed before sitting, relieved to have the weight off of his leg after a long day.

“Productive,” she replied, sitting at the opposite end of the mattress. “Rewarding, you could say. But I’ll spare you the details this evening.”

“I can’t wait to hear,” Kaz said. “If you want to sleep, I can grab an extra blanket.”

“Trying to get rid of me so soon?” she asked. “If you’re tired, we can rest, but I still feel wide awake.”

“What would you like to do then, my darling?” he asked.

“Talk to you,” Inej replied. “Maybe hold your hand, if you’re feeling scandalous this evening.”

He chuckled. “Both of those are well within my ability tonight,” he assured her, reaching out his hand, gloves sitting on his desk a few feet away.

She took his hand and interlaced their fingers. Her skin was warm and smooth, save for the callouses on her fingertips.

“There is something else I’d like to do, if you’re up for it,” she said.

He had almost forgotten, but her words quickly sparked his memory. The feeling of anticipation set in almost instantly. Still, he played dumb. Nonchalant, if you will. “What did you have in mind?”

“I’d like to try tickling you, if you’re okay with it,” she said. Even she looked a bit flustered at the concept, which made Kaz feel slightly less silly.

He cleared his throat. “Have you been thinking about it since you left?”

Inej nodded. “You rarely let yourself laugh, or have fun. I think it might be nice to witness.”

“I have fun all the time,” he replied. “I find heists quite fun.”

That made her laugh, that carefree laugh that made him feel intoxicated. Perhaps he understood why she would want to hear the same from him.

“Have you thought about it?” she asked.

He nodded. “A bit.”

If she knew he was selling it short, she didn’t comment on it. Instead, she moved closer on the bed, so close that their knees brushed through the safety of cloth. “Well, where should I start then?”

It was rare that words failed Kaz Brekker, but Inej had a carefully crafted way of rendering his brain and mouth entirely useless. “I don’t know,” he replied. “Wherever you like, I suppose. I assume in a normal situation, I wouldn’t get much of a say in that anyway.”

“Is there anywhere I can’t touch?” Inej asked.

Kaz considered it. “My bad leg. And stay above the clothes, please.”

“Of course.”

The tension was thick enough for Inej to cut it with one of her many knives, and Kaz wasn’t sure if his emotions were better described as nervous or excited. The perfect middle ground between the two, perhaps. Gently, Inej coaxed him to lie back on the bed, and she sat beside him, cross-legged, seemingly scanning his body for a place to start.

Her hands slowly reached out and hovered a few inches above his stomach, making him instinctively suck in a breath. Time seemed to move in slow motion as she brought her fingers down and experimentally wiggled her fingers.

Kaz’s breath caught in his throat. The fabric of his shirt did little to dull the sensation, but the barrier was appreciated for reasons unrelated.

“Is this okay?” Inej asked.

He nodded, because if he opened his mouth, something embarrassing was going to spill out. Like a giggle, and Kaz Brekker did not giggle. His lips were already attempting to curl into a smile, but he sucked his teeth and squeezed his eyes shut, refusing to give in so soon.

Her touch was still semi-bearable, more like an annoying itch than anything hysteria-inducing.

“I guess you aren’t too sensitive here,” Inej said, and he could hear the smirk in her tone. She was clearly enjoying herself, and Kaz…Well, he would die before admitting that he was too.

Fingers scampered over to his side, and the new spot sent him squirming away in surprise, a little huff of laughter escaping him. He opened his eyes with the intention of glaring at her, but he only managed to look stern for about a second before she picked up the pace, blunt fingernails scratching at the bottom of his rib cage, and the laughter spilled out before he could stop it.

It had been a long time since he had laughed like that, hard and without concern for seeming weak, or for keeping up the tough face of Dirtyhands. He felt youthful when he laughed that way.

Inej smiled down at him, bright and genuine. If it took making a fool of himself to see that smile, Kaz would become a jester for the king of Ravka. He would fumble every game of cards, let Jesper tease him more often, do cartwheels through the streets. All to make her smile.

Her fingers brushed a sensitive spot by the top of his ribs and the noise that escaped him was much higher in pitch than he thought he was capable of. To save what little amount of dignity he had remaining, Inej did not comment on it. However, she did hone in on the spot, searching for the sound again.

Kaz brought a hand up to cover his face, hoping to both muffle his laughter as well as hide the color rising in his cheeks.

“You don’t have to hide from me, Kaz,” Inej said softly. “I love hearing you laugh.”

Her words were enough to make him melt. Tentatively, he let his hand fall from his mouth, just for a second, so that she could hear the raspy sound of his laughter.

Inej only tickled him for a bit longer, not wanting to wear him out. The sound of her laughter intertwined with his residual giggles and attempts to catch his breath.

“Was that alright?” she asked.

Kaz nodded, because he didn’t trust himself to speak truthfully if he opened his mouth. It was hard for him to admit things, sappy or flustering things specifically.

She grinned and leaned down to kiss him, softly and he returned it.

They did go to sleep then, the spare blanket pulled out of the closet and the two of them curled up on the mattress. Kaz fell asleep with a smile curling his lips, secretly hoping that Inej would do that again soon. He had waited so long for her to follow through on her words, so he figured it was only fair to indulge in the act some more. And besides, she had plenty more spots to find.

#kanej #kanej fluff #six of crows #soc fic #soc tickle fic #soc ticklefic #grishaverse #grishaverse fic #shadow and bone tv #kaz brekker #inej ghafa #kaz x inej #inej x kaz #fic #raspberry writes #six of crows fic #ticklish kaz brekker

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excelynch · 11 months

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which brother lynch are you?

(write the letter of the answer you chose on a paper, at the end you will have the result of each letter)

1 - this one can't be left out of course so tell me, are you a soldier, king or poet?

a) soldier

b) king

c) poet

2 - in the shower, what is the water temperature?

a) cold

b) hot

c) warm (I looked it up but maybe I'm wrong... sooo it's between the options A and B. let's go to the next question then yee

• now about the song gun in my hand by dorothy, i have two questions for you.

3 - complete with what makes the most sense to you

"why did love put a gun in my..."?

a) bed

b) hand

c) head

4 - now, why is the gun with you?

a) was it for redemption?

b) was it for revenge?

c) was it for the ledge?

5 - (if you haven't read six of crows just skip this question... wait, you haven't read it yet?? GO. READ. IT. NOW. 🤨) anyway... which character from six of crows do you most identify with?

a) matthias, kaz

b) inej, jesper

c) nina, wylan

6 - which of the interactions between the lynch brothers is your favorite?

a) ronan literally dreaming a little brother

b) "put on your headphones, matthew" "i forgot them" "so pretend you have your headphones on"

c) them going to church every sunday and arguing the rest of the week

7 - sooo which parent of the lynch family? (tbh there is only one correct answer 🤺

a) niall

b) mor

c) aurora

8 - you're hungry so you open the fridge, what do you get?

a) I get the ingredients to make something to eat

b) take leftovers from lunch

c) I wait for the person who chose option A to make us something to eat

9 - ok now another one about them. pick one thing about the lynch brothers

a) the weird way declan writes on the phone

b) ronan's tattoo as a form of rebellion

c) matthew and his power to make everyone like him

10 - before going to sleep you ask for sandman to dream about what you most want. what do you dream about?

a) a beach with the wind in my face, I sit on a log lost in the sand and watch the dark sea, alone. peace

b) a green and beautiful field, I am running and screaming. freedom

c) the house where I grew up, with everything the same as I remember, the dinner table is set and I sit with all those I miss. happiness

...

now just add which letter you got the most and tell me the results in the comments :)

a = declan

b = ronan

c = matthew

I hope that you enjoyed!!! and sorry for any mistakes, I'm learning english :) see you in the next quiz <3

I was thinking of doing one about the marauders, what do you think? if you have any ideas just tell me!

#the raven cycle #trc #ronan lynch #declan lynch #matthew lynch #the gangsey #marauders #the dreamer trilogy #dreamer trilogy #the lynch family #the lynch brothers #niall lynch #aurora lynch #mor o corra

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lilisouless · 1 year

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Grishaverse characters as movie makers

Part 2

Inej: Shots all possible (and even impossible) angles. Lots of symbolism in the takes (ex: mostly uses sea to represent freedom and alleys to represent fear) and most of the dialogs are proverbs since every other scene is either quiet activities or realistic fight scenes that always involves a blade. Never repeats location, the main character always ends up murdering someone who deserved it at one point or another. Doesn't use music, only natural sound.

Kaz& Genya: Use the same basic storyline; cathartic revenge plots with unscrupulous anti heroes as the MC, an "eat the rich" vibe, lots of blood imagery and show off of the production team. The diference being:

-Kaz frames it as mysteries, deliberately confussing time lines, fake leads and flashbacks once the plot twist is revealed. His takes are pretentious, focussed on stress the audience and uses a lot of camera spins. His aestetic varies ; urban, dark academia,cyber punk or fantasy punk.

-Genya is more classy and less chaotic, she puts more focus on the performances than on camera movements. Her aestetic can vary from victorian, regal, light academia or cottage core to clash with the dark storyline

Mal: Found footage movies. Its pretty simple, he puts a camera on his head and walks around the forest to find anything interesting or that resembles a ghost or a dangerous beast. He uses all the footage, no matter the results; not even that time he was racing from a savage animal that turned out to be a squirrel that wanted the nuts on his pants, when he fought a bear and ended up adopting it or when Alina´s voice could be heard in the background , asking him to stop fooling around and do the dishes like he asked him to.

Jesper: His tecnique is similar to Mal. But puts the camera on an animal companion (a horse or a goat) so people won't miss his gorgeous face. He does way more risky things, like running in the middle of a storm or in a gang fight. Unlike Mal he does editing on the footage and adds a lot of effects with no actual meaning , like photoshoping himself figthing a giant hamster. All his budget goes to his shiny and colorful outfits he never repeats on a single scene (sometimes not even a single shot). He once envisioned and wrote the script for the story of a boy struggling with adiction and insecurity that he covers with jokes and a vanity facade while feeling trapped in a dark world that is easier to live in and a healthy life he would like but feels he doesn't deserve...but that doesn't include battling a giant hamster so what would be the point?

IF ANYONE HAS SUGESTIONS FOR ZOYA I WISH TO HEAR THEM

#STILL DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH ZOYA! HELP!#last post is the last one to procastinate it #inej ghafa #kaz brekker #genya safin #malyen oretsev #jesper fahey #grishaverse shitpost #sab shitpost #grishaverse #netflix shadow and bone #shaow and bone #leigh bardugo

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kaitcreates · 1 year

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In honor of Shadow and Bone season 2 coming out today: If the six of crows were in the shadowhunter chronicles(book spoilers)

Kaz: Kaz and Jordie moved after their father died. As young mundanes with the sight they did odd jobs for Jakob Hertzoon for a short while. Eventually they realized Jakob was conning them but only after he had taken all their money and left them without a word. Fending for themselves when a plague swept their city Jordie contracted it and in a desperate attempt to save his brother Kaz had to half drag his brother to the nearest hospital. Unfortunately he ended up falling into the water along with his brother’s body which he found dead when he resurfaced in the water. Being forced to use his brother corpse to float back to sure Kaz developed an aversion to touch afterwards. He eventually discovered that Jacob was in actually Pekka Rollins a well known member of many local shadow markets.

Inej: As half-fey, Inej grew up traveling around the country with her parents and their friends. Preforming for the locals in shadow markets Inej learned to become a skilled acrobat. She never stayed king enough in any given shadow market to get any real sense of how business was done their. That changed when she was 14 and was captured by slavers and subsequently bought by Tante Heleen to be a prostitute at the menagerie, a prostitute house for members of the downworld. One day she met Kaz and after offering him information the previous day Per Haskell bought her indenture at Kaz’s insistence and she became a member of the dregs, a local shadow market gang that while didn’t allow her to go completely free gave her more freedom to go to different shadow markets that the dregs had become a part of.

Nina: A young shadowhunter whose parent were killed when she was barely a toddler. Taken in by the local institute she grew up to be a skilled shadowhunter and by 17 joined in an expedition going around the world to find mundanes with the sight willing to join the shadowhunter academy after the events of the dark war.

Matthias: Born a werewolf, Matthias’ parents’s pack were murdered when he was eight by extremist shadowhunters who followed Valentines ideology but didn’t participate in the uprising. Taken in by a new pack, he was raised to believe that all shadowhunters were that bad. When he turned 18 he was sent out with other pack members to find a new den after their previous one had been destroyed by the resident vampires. On the way back after finding a possible new base they came across a young shadowhunter girl who they promptly captured and brought with them to be killed in front of the whole pack. Without the help of a portal the used a small boat they rented to get back to the pack but they encountered a storm and the boat was destroyed. He and the shadowhunter who he learners was name Nina were stranded out at sea for days until they landed on wrangel island and bounded during their time trying to find civilization.

Jesper: A secret shadowhunter posing as a mundane with the sight, Jesper spend his time gambling in the dark corners of the shadow market. Even after his mother left the shadowhunters to be with his father she never stopped trying to help people. Sacrificing her life to save a small child during a rampaging demon attack his dad taught him that being a shadowhunter was too dangerous and Keaper never joined their ranks even as he became older.

Wylan: The son of a wealthy and influential mundane with the sight, Jan Van Eck who still abuse Wylan because of Wylan’s Dyslexia, Wylan ran away from his father after a failed assassination attempt. Living on the streets and selling potions he’s barely surviving until a certain someone comes in offering him to join their gang.

#shadowhunters #the shadowhunter chronicles #tsc #six of crows #soc #shadow and bone #sab #jesper fahey #wylan van eck #kaz brekker #inej ghafa #nina zenik #matthias helvar

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my-kindred-spirit · 3 years

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Which is your favourite flower, Kaz?

Summary: Two years after the ending of Crooked Kingdom, Kaz and Inej enjoy a well-deserved moment of peace and happiness in Kaz's farm, surrounded by the beauty of nature. They reflect on their past and the healing they've done, as well as on their feelings for each other.

Pairing: Kaz x Inej

Basically, this is just pure FLUFF!!!

INEJ

Inej had always loved looking at the sky. When her mind was still young and naïve, she used to imagine herself walking between the clouds on a white sparkly tightrope, leaving behind her a silver trail decorating the silent sky. She used to dream of her spirit hanging in the air and her soul flying free in the blue infinity of the firmament, with a smile printed on her face and the lightness that is conferred only by liberty sculpted in her heart.

When her mind was trying to survive the horrors that Fate had destined to her, Inej still looked at the sky. Ketterdam’s sky was grey, opaque with the steam of the cities and almost threatening in his abyssal vastness. It wasn’t arid though. It was very much alive, reached day and night by the laughs of the tourists wandering through the narrow streets of the Barrel, by the drunken songs of the men wasting themselves in the taverns and the joyful or frustrated shouts of the ones playing in the gambling halls. But the sky was also the inevitable witness of the desperate pleas of people being defrauded or robbed, of the painful cries of some poor souls abandoned by the Saints and doomed to a fate of violence and sorrows, of the desperate sobs of girls violated in the brothels.

Read it on AO3 here!

The sky had never been reached by the Wraith’s voice though. She liked to contemplate it in silence, sitting on Ghezen’s thumb and savoring all the memories of when the clouds looked softer. She had actually hanged in the air and flied as the most elegant and gracious of the birds, but her stage had been roofs and chimneys, not clouds. Her curtain had been a grey and opaque sky, not a bright and azure one. Still, she had defeated gravity, even if not how she had dreamt as a child.

Now that her mind had known pain and had wandered even through the world’s darkest meanders, Inej still loved looking at the sky. She liked to remember both the acrobatics she had performed on the rope, admired by her proud family, and the brave stunts she had succeeded in as the Wraith, with Ketterdam’sky as her sole witness. She liked to admire the blue intense sky towering on the True Sea and the azure one inundating with light and hope Kaz’s farm.

It was early June and the clouds looked softer than ever. The sun burnt high in the clear azure sky and his shiny rays softly tinged the boundless meadows gold.

Inej let her eyes part from the sky and wander around the immense verdant meadows surrounding her, which stretched as far as eye can see and finally got lost between the vague trembling lines of the horizon, in a pyrotechnic explosion of colours. She admired the flowery fields and the carpet of grass she was sitting on, embroidered with the golden light of the daffodils, the white purity of the daisies, the gentle pink of the roses, the purple of the wild geranium – her mother’s favourite flower- and the strong blue of the irises, which reminded her of the unforgiving waves colliding with her Wraith. On the distance she could see the orchards tinging the landscape pink: she recognized the light-pink petals of cherries, the darker pink and orange flowers of the peaches and then the white and pinkish heart-shaped flowers of the apricots, slowly falling to the ground and leaving place to the orange velvety drupes.

The fresh floral perfume was inebriating and the delicate scent of grass, soft and faintly damp under her touch, graced her nostrils and intoxicated her thoughts. A soft symphony of birds singing reigned in the colourful heaven and lulled her, accompanied by the gentle tune of a light pleasant breeze, the soft murmurings of the creek beyond the orchards and the melody of... of feets approaching her.

“You have picked some flowers.” Inej turned around and watched Kaz nodding to the wooden basket full of flowers, while slowly sitting beside her. This Kaz’s voice, Kaz Rietveld's voice, was not as raspy as Kaz Brekker’s one. He wasn’t even using the cane, which he had come to find unnecessary for walking on the soft grass. This Kaz, her Kaz, had longer hair on the sides and brown highlights, result of almost three weeks spent in the sun. He had even tanned a bit and gotten freckles all over his cheekbones and the bridge of his nose, and the corners of his mouth seemed to be turned up in a smile more often than not. He was wearing simple black breeches and a loose white shirt with the sleeves rolled up. No coat, no hat. No gloves. His eyes, however, were the same colour of bitter coffee as always.

“Wylan helped me earlier.” Inej observed Kaz eyeing the flowers with a troubled expression and then slowly lifting his head to look at her. “I've never given you flowers.”

KAZ

“You have picked some flowers”. Inej turned around and Kaz swore he had felt his heart stopping. The sun rays caressed her chocolate skin and framed her beautiful face. Oil black lashes fanned over her cheeks and a light breeze ruffled her silky dark hair. Her obsidian eyes resembled the darkest of the abysses and Kaz craved to forget himself and die in his pitch-dark immensity. Her vivid eyes sparkled as the brightest and most vibrant of stars and Kaz ached to live eternally and enshrine that light in a golden casket.

To Kaz, she didn’t look real, not for him. To Kaz, she looked holier that any of the Saints she devotedly believed in, so stunning that he thought he might just break down and cry if he looked at her any longer. Enveloped by the rainbow of flowers and trees, she looked like a picture painted by Purity itself, with the colourful palette of kindness and hope and the silver brush of strength and determination.

Kaz couldn’t thank any God enough that she was real. He jealously cherished every moment in which his eyes were graced with the sight of her elegant figure and kind smile, as he had never seen her before, as he would never see her again. He had learned to welcome and appreciate even the feeling of his breath catching and mouth drying whenever he looked at her, whenever he was a boy again, sure that there was magic in this world.

To Kaz, looking at Inej felt like dying. It felt like he couldn’t hope nor ask to breathe the same air of a heart so kind, a soul so hopeful, a mind so strong. It felt like being lost in the vastness of the universe, like navigating the tumultuous waves of the True sea, overwhelmed by feelings he never knew his hearth could fell, stunned by a fate he didn’t believe he deserved. It felt like being consumed by her, for her.

To Kaz, looking at Inej felt like living. It felt like he could hope to walk this land as a better man, like he had managed to pull himself together into some semblance of a man for her. It felt like having been hurt and then healed, like the sorrows and ghost of his past wouldn’t persecute him for evermore, like life was worth living. It felt like being whole, like the void in his soul had been filled by her, for her.

To Kaz, looking at Inej felt like looking at the sun, like being warmed and burned, overwhelmed by a powerful oxymoron of emotions, a powerful oxymoron of life and death. To Kaz, Inej looked like the sun. To Kaz, Inej looked brighter than the sun.

“Wylan helped me earlier.” Kaz looked at the wooden basket full of flowers and a sudden realization striked him : flowers, he had never gifted her with flowers. He had given her a knife, sure, but he had done it for his own personal purposes, for turning her into his Wraith. Now they had been staying in Johannus Rietveld's farm for almost three weeks, literally surrounded by flowers, and he had never given her any. Would she have wanted him to? Would she have liked a gift that would have reminded her of her happy childhood, and not of the violence she had been forced to face? Would she have liked a gift that he would have given her had they met in another life, had they been Inej Ghafa and Kaz Rietveld, instead of the Wraith and the Bastard of the Barrel?

He shifted his eyes back to hers and murmured weakly, “I’ve never given you flowers.” Inej looked taken aback for a moment, eyes wide and lips slightly parted, before quickly recomposing herself and setting her face into a stoic, indecipherable expression. She looked straight into his eyes, pursed lips and brow furrowed, and Kaz knew he was inevitably about to enhance the list of his unforgivable sins. “Kaz”, her voice came out unbearably severe and disappointed and Kaz knew he would have gladly chosen death if it’d mean he would never be the one to bring that tone in her angelic voice again. But then her lips twitched almost imperceptibly, like she was trying with all her might to hold back Kaz’s final death sentence, and her eyes gleamed with… amusement?

A laugh, she was trying to hold back a laugh. How Inej managed to turn Dirtyhands, the brain which had broken into the Ice Court and destroyed one of Ketterdam’s most powerful man, into a lovestruck fool was downright beyond him. “Inej”, he sighed defeated and her whole face lighted up with delight, before she carefreely threw her head back and released the most infectious and crystalline of laughs. Now Kaz was sure he was going to die, mercilessly killed by the most beatific sound which had ever reached his ears, undeniably annihilated by the same laugh he craved for all-day long and graced his dreams every night, by the truest and most profound essence of her.

Her eyes sparkled with sheer love and a warm, affectionate smile enlightened her features: “Kaz, you gave me my Wraith, you found my parents for me, you restored my freedom when I thought there were no hope or salvation left for me”, she cooed fondly and tenderly, “do you honestly believe I would be upset because you never gave me flowers?”. Kaz felt his lips immediately turning up in a sincere smile and, not trusting himself with words, slowly shifted his hand and brushed his knuckles against hers, asking the permission she immediately granted, sliding her smaller hand into his callous one and entwining their fingers. It was always like this between them, a game of continuous asking and giving permissions, of constant gaining and offering trust, a game he genuinely believed they were slowly yet effectively winning.

“Do you want to know what my father used to tell me when I was little?” Inej asked softly, while lovingly drawing little circles with her thumb on Kaz’s bare hand.

“Another Suli wise proverb?” he smirked.

“No, Kaz”, she playfully rolled her eyes, “not another of our useful proverbs. He used to tell me that there would have been many boys to bring me flowers, but that only one would have known my favourite flower, or song or sweet. And that even if he’d have been too poor to give me any, he wouldn’t have mattered, because that boy, and him only, had earnt my heart.”

Kaz’s heart leaped with joy: he knew. He had never given her flowers, but he knew her favourite one, he knew. “Dahlia. Your favourite flower is the Dahlia, the red one. You told me when we saw one in the flower stall in Goedmedbridge, remember? We were following those Dime Lions. You said you liked it because it appeared elegant and graceful, but that the red colour made it look also somewhat powerful and strong.”, he blurted out with the excitement of a child. ”And your favourite sweet are those chocolate biscuits Nina made you try when you visited her in Ravka last summer. The ones she had cooked modifying Matthias's Fjerdian recipe.”

“And my favourite song?”

Hearing Inej’s trembling, touched voice snapped Kaz out of his frantic enthusiasm, his grin softening into a lovely crooked smile and devotion gleaming in his eyes. “You don’t have one. You can’t choose between all the lullabies your mother singed to get you to sleep.”

INEJ

Inej didn’t answer. She tightened her hold on Kaz’s hand, but didn’t answer. She fought the urge to cry – if from happiness or gratitude or emotion she couldn’t say-, but didn’t answer. She looked into his strong tea brown eyes as if he was a miracle of her Saints, but didn’t answer. She couldn’t, for the life of her, find her voice, because this boy, this man, had earned her heart.

She had fallen for Dirtyhands under the grey sky of Ketterdam, the man who had freed her from a cage of horrors and humiliations and had given her, if not happiness or safety, a new perspective, a new possibility at life. She had fallen for the man who, as first thing, had refused to call her with that grotesque, demeaning name Tante Heleen had given her, but had asked for her real name, for how she wished to be called. She had fallen for the Bastard of the Barrel, the man who had taught her how to fight and defend herself, how to become powerful and even dangerous, how to make others respect her. She had fallen for the man who had never wanted to own her or annihilate her identity. She had fallen for the man who, even if hadn’t promised her that, had always protected her, whatever the cost.

Then she had slowly came to know Kaz Rietveld and had fallen hard for him too. She had fallen for the boy who looked sincerely ashamed after being scolded by Mr. Fahey, for the boy who fought everyday against his demons and was willing to defeath them to be with her. She had fallen for the boy who smiled light-heartedly and laughed freely, for the boy whose eyes glowed in the sun and gleamed with a nervous yet warm devotion while braiding her hair.

She had fallen for the man who wanted her and wished to dedicate himself to her, without gloves, without armour. She had fallen for the naive, sweet boy Kaz had once been and for the man revenge and greed had shaped, a crow mercilessly remindful or who had wronged him, but also of who had been kind and fair. She had fallen for who he was becoming, a man who had known pain and hatred, but was willing to open the rusty gate of his hearth to love and friendship.

She had fallen for Kaz Brekker, the man who had returned her the liberty which had been violently snatched from her and had found her beloved parents. The man who had encouraged her ambitions and supported her constantly in her fight against the slavers.

She had fallen for Kaz Brekker. She loved Kaz Brekker, and he had earned her heart. He possessed her heart.

“I can braid your hair, if you’d like. I… I could add the flowers.” Hadn’t she just been thinking he owned her heart?

Her voice still failed her, so she resolved to nod. She watched Kaz shifting a bit to sit behind her and heard his breathing deepening. After a few instants, Inej welcomed the cherished feeling of Kaz’s long fingers caressing her inky hair with a gentleness that didn’t surprise her anymore. She felt him dividing the hair into three even parts, before crossing the left section over the middle one and then doing the same with the right section. As always, he worked in silence, section after section, strand after strand, breath by breath, brick by brick. The first times he had braided her hair, Inej had felt Kaz's fingers trembling and his breathing fastening, so she had started to ask him what was on his mind, to distract him, or she would tell him stories from her childhood, to soothe him.

Now, his fingers didn't tremble anymore and he was rather succesful in controlling his breathing, but Inej still whished to hear his concentrated voice. She still wanted to explore the gears of his psyche, to navigate the thunderous stream of his thoughts, to know the forbidden ruminations of his complex mind. “Wha”, she coughed, clearing his throat, “What are you thinking right now, Kaz?”

“I thought you'd never ask.”, he chuckled, and Inej could perfectly figure his mischievous grin.

“Kaz.”

“Darling Inej, treasure of my heart, I'm thinking about how it's taking me forever to braid all this hair. I swear I'll cut it, one day or another.”

“You wouldn't dare!”, she cried out in mock outrage, repressing a laugh.

“Would you slit my throat with Sankta Alina while I sleep, if I cut it?”

“You have to ask?”

“Then no, I wouldn't dare.”, Kaz answered with an exaggeratedly fearful tone that really didn't suit him.

They kept silent for a moment, pursing their lips, before giving in and bursting out laughing until tears rolled down their cheeks with amusement. “I never knew Dityhands was so easily scared", Inej sputtered out between laughs, “he is such a chicken, isn't he?”.

“Stop making me laugh Inej", he sniggered, “or I'll get confused and will have to start the braid from the beginning. I'm doing a delicate operation here while you just sit and laugh, you know?”

“Sorry, sorry", she wiped a tear from her left eye, “but you still have to tell me what you are thinking about.”

They slowly calmed down, quieting their breathing and setting into a comforting silence. Inej, however, had felt Kaz’s fingers slightly tensing up and when his hand shifted to take a geranium into the basket -after having secured the braid-, she asked again. “Kaz, tell me please.”

He took a deep breath. His fingers trembled. “I’m thinking if this is how it would have been. If we hadn’t become Dirtyhands and the Wraith, that is.”

Inej’s heart gave a painful squeeze. “Kaz”, she started soothingly, “we-.

“Would you want us to be only Kaz Rietveld and Inej Ghafa, sitting on the grass and enjoying the sun, while I braid your hair? Would you want me to be able to touch you as every man touches his girlfriend? Would you- ”

“No, Kaz, I wouldn’t.”, she brusquely interrupted him, “I wouldn’t.”. She swiftly turned around, took both his hands in hers without giving much thought to caution and permissions, and looked straight into his eyes with the determination of who allows for no replication. “I wouldn’t, Kaz. I wouldn’t because, if we hadn’t become Dirtyhands and the Wraith, we would have never met. And even if we had met, we wouldn’t have been who we are today, and believe me when I say I’d never change who we are, for anything in the world. It’s not Kaz Rietveld the one I’m in love with, you know. I’m in love with him, with Dirtyhands, with the Bastard of the Barrel.” Inej swore he’d never looked that dumbfounded, but she wasn’t quite finished. “I’m in love with Kaz Brekker. I’m in love with you, Kaz. As you’re in love with the Wraith, with Captain Ghafa, with Inej. Aren’t you, Kaz?”, and this time she didn’t even try to hold back the tears.

“Inej”, he murmured with a devotion who made her feel holier than the Saints she believed in, “Inej”, he repeated, while slowly untangling his right hand from hers and lifting it to her cheeks. With the gentlest touch, he captured her tears with his fingertips and delicately wiped them away, one by one. “Inej”, and if she could have bottled the sound of her name being so tenderly whispered by his lips and gotten drunk on it every night, she would have. ”Inej”, he delicately cupped her right cheek, while his other hand went to softly rest on her neck. “Inej”, he got closer to her and Inej thought her heart might just jump out of her chest, “Inej”, and he slowly lowered his head, lips hovering over her cheek. “Inej”, and his crimson lips brushed the tip of her nose, his hands slightly tremulous. “Inej", and his warm lips captured a tear rolling down her left cheek, and then another and another. “Inej", and his soft lips grazed her forehead, while she lifted her trembly hands and delicately yet eagerly rested them on his wrists. “Inej", and she had barely a moment to register the lonely tear falling from his left eye, before she finally felt the cherished pressure of his moist lips against hers, both familiar and new all at once. And a rainbow of colours and emotions exploded behind her closed eyelids.

In this moment, when Kaz's lips were pressed against hers, Inej knew that she'd never be the same again, that she'd never forget the taste of him, that she’d never give anything for granted, that she'd never stop fighting for what is good and just in this twisted world. In this moment, while she could feel the faintest brushes of tongues and the most sheer connection of hearts and souls, Inej found herself floating away, knowing nothing but Kaz, his smell, his breath, his hands on her skin, his hearth throbbing madly in his chest. In this moment, when he finally met her where she had been waiting for him, Inej thanked all her Saints and treasured the arduous path that, after years of battles and sufferings and anguish, had allowed them to live this precious instant, this precious everything.

When they finally pulled away, hearts gone mad with joy and euphoria, Inej looked into Kaz's blissful eyes and gave him a watery smile: “Which is your favourite flower, Kaz?”

A/N: Hey guys, thank you so much for reading!!! What do you think Kaz's favourite flower would be?? Tell me in the comments!

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elliepassmore · 5 years

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Crooked Kingdom Review

5/5 stars Recommended for people who like: heist stories, fantasy, multiple POVs, revenge, diverse characters CK picks up about a week after the end of SoC with a whole slew of new problems for our favorite gang. To recap, Van Eck the Elder has Inej, the Dregs are out 30 million, Kaz made a deal with Pekka Rollins, Nina took parem and is now addicted, but alive, and, newly discovered in chapter one, the Shu are sending weird Grisha/bird/angel things after other Grishas. Sounds like a Monday in the the Barrel. While the plot of the first book mainly focused on the Dregs getting a scientist out of the Ice Court, this one focuses on them getting their money's worth from Van Eck after he double-crossed them. Of course, nothing is ever that simple with Kaz, who has now made it one of his personal missions to not only get the $30 million from Van Eck with a little to spare, but also to ruin Van Eck's reputation. This is next to his other personal mission of tearing Pekka Rollins down brick by brick. The issues that arise as the Dregs try to accomplish this are ridiculous . Not ridiculous as in 'outside the realm of suspension of belief', but ridiculous as in 'wow, you guys just keep getting in more trouble of your own making.' Everything fits, even Kaz's admitted missteps--yes, Kaz admits a mistake aloud, I was shocked the first time reading it too--and it all plays surprisingly well into the story. I'll start with the characters that had more of an arc this story than the last one. First up is Jesper. Remember in the last book when he admitted to Inej he wagered his father's farm in a loan? Well that comes to fruition here, and his father, Colm, is dragged into Ketterdam as a trap to try and get the Dregs killed or captured. Having Colm in town drudges up a lot of Jesper's issues with gambling or, more accurately, his issues with losing at gambling. We got to see Jesper explain that gambling, much like shooting, help soothe what he referred to as 'the itch' of restlessness he has. Despite the tension between him and his father, it was nice to see the two of them interact, Bardugo wrote their relationship in such a way it's clear how much Colm cares for his son, even when he messes up. It also added some dichotomy between the group, showing that Jesper really is the only one with access to a parent who cares about them; Nina, Matthias, and Kaz's parents are dead, Inej's parents are a sea away, and Wylan's father cares more about money than him. The arc for Jesper in this story did focus a lot around his father, but it also focused on him making amends and growing as a Grisha. Jesper made some mistakes in the last book that he's working to fix now, and it leads to a pretty poignant exchange between him and Inej toward the end of the book that sticks with him. With his father involved, he's clearly struggling to reconcile the idea that he doesn't want to disappoint his father and wants to keep him safe with the reality that he's made some bad decisions andbecause of that his father isn't safe. Compounding on all these problems is Jesper also struggling with the idea of being Grisha and how to handle that moving forward. Things clearly changed for him during the Ice Court job, but he's not entirely sure how to handle that change. Nina wants him to go to Ravka, of course, but there's hesitation in Jesper that's telling him to stay away. There's also the fear of staying in Ketterdam as a Grisha. It's later discovered that this hesitation and fear is in part due to his mother being a Grisha and dying trying to help someone, and in part due to his father's reaction to her death. After being taught to shove down his powers for most of his life, the idea of living in harmony with them obviously scares Jesper, and another large part of his arc in this book is wrestling with that fear and this 'new' identity as Grisha and whether or not to let the fear stay--it is not entirely unfounded--and continue on as he has, or to embrace being Grisha and all that comes with it. Nina also has a stronger arc in this story than in SoC. At the end of the last book, she was still recovering from the effects of taking parem in order to help the group escape Fjerda. At the start of this one she's still struggling with the addiction. The danger of withdrawal is past, but she still craves the drug, even going so far as to beg Matthias for a little bit more. The toll the drug has taken on her is monumental, she's lost weight, has little appetite, seems perpetually tired, and has difficulty using her Heartrender powers, even on herself. I actually really liked Nina's story line in this book because we so rarely get to see addiction in fantasy formats, especially in the sort of light Bardugo frames it in. In other formats the addiction is phrased as a medication the character is addicted to and needs for their health or something that was forced upon them. Here, Nina took parem to save her friends, knowing what would happen, and life after taking it and becoming addicted is presented as hard and unpleasant and sometimes feels like it's not worth it. Everyone is clearly worried about Nina, taking quiet victories in her eating a little more than the day before or joking around or standing up to Kaz on behalf of the other Grisha in the city. A second part of Nina's arc, related to parem, is that her powers have become something different, something she feels isn't wholly natural. As a Heartrender, Nina had control over people's body and could raise or lower their heart rates, relax muscles, and even had a limited ability to heal and disguise people. All of this created a connection to people and to the living. After parem, her power's have manifested in having control of the dead--think, dust clouds and bones as shrapnel and, yes, even getting the dead walking--and to her it feels like a part of her is hollowed out because of it. So, on top of having to deal with still craving parem, she also has to reconcile how she views her powers and their/her place in the world. Matthias also has a lot of character development in this book. After/during the Ice Court job, he softened up around the crew and even began changing how he felt about Grisha. These changes really come to fruition here. The more he sees and learns about Grisha, their powers, and even how different cultures view them, the more he seems to understand that Grisha are as natural as humans and begins questioning just how the drüskelle and Fjerda managed to tilt so far in the opposite direction. He even recognizes something Nina did in the previous book--for all of Fjerda's dislike of the Grisha, it's almost certain the miracles of their saints and even the Ice Court itself is due to Grisha powers. As the book continues, Matthias begins recognizing more and more the toxicity of what the drüskelle preach and comes up with a loose idea that he wants to work to change the teachings and get rid of some of the hate. Wylan's story is changed in a major way over the course of the book when he realizes something his father kept from him (*SPOILER* his mother is not dead, but instead locked away in an asylum his father stuck her in when he decided he wanted a new wife and a new heir *SPOILER END*. He also advances as a character who sees more than just the good side and bad side of things, but also the middle, the idea that good people do bad things and that bad people are sometimes the most effective vessels for change for the better. Wylan also wrestles a bit with his identity in this book, as he's stuck looking like Kuwei Yul-Bo for most of it, a change he seems to not mind that much until Jesper gets the two of them mixed up. After the surprise discovery, and toward the end of the book, Wylan gets to decide what kind of person he's going to become. He seems to decide to take a page from the books of the people surrounding him try to have "every bit of bravado he'd learned from Nina, the will he'd learned from Matthias, the focus he'd studied in Kaz, hte courage he'd learned from Inej, and the wild, reckless hope he'd learned from Jesper, the belief that no matter the odds, somehow they'd always win" (427). Inej's goal for the future is clearly set in her mind during this book, and she seems eager to get her ship to hunt down slavers. That's not to say, however, that she's done with the crew. She's still the Wraith, she still sees Ketterdam as one of her homes, she's still a Dreg. As clear as her goals are, she wants to be around to help Nina and Matthias and the other Grisha get to safety, to help Jesper protect his father, to help Wylan get his back at his father, and of course to help Kaz get the money. She seems to worry more in this book, but has a greater feel of freedom about her as she does so. To me, reading her chapters, it felt like something had been lifted off her shoulders and she decided once and for all that she is Inej Ghafa, the Wraith, future slaver hunter, and that she will not settle for less, even if it means letting go of some people. I like how Inej's story line wraps up at the end of the book, and I would definitely be open to reading a book about what she does next, if Bardugo ever decided that's something she wants to pursue. Finally, Kaz. He's definitely gotten trickier in this book. Throughout the story he's playing two, three different games, arranging and rearranging people as he likes as if they're chess pieces, or whatever the chess-equivalent is in Ketterdam. He says things that hint, and sometimes almost blatantly tell, at what he's planning on doing, and even how he'll achieve it, but it's hard to catch if you aren't looking for it. Some things don't go to plan, a lot of things don't go to plan, and Kaz actually does admit to his mistakes aloud in this one, but he thinks quickly and has contingent after contingent ready to pluck from his mind. You definitely get to see how his mind works more in this one than in the Ice Court job, and with all the cogs that turn in his head I'm actually surprised he waited this long to oust Per Haskell. Of course, he plays the long-game, so it's entirely possible he had a plan like this in his head all along an the job from the first book and the issues with Van Eck just sped it along. Aside from further developing his criminal mastermind, we also get to see some development on the personal front. As opposed to the barely-held thread Kaz held onto when his skin was touched in the first book, we see him tolerating a little more in this one when he deems it necessary--bathroom scene, the Slat scene, the last scene. Further, we get to see him caring for the crew a little more overtly in this book, admitting to Jesper that he cares, working to get the Grisha to safety for Nina, trying to let his barriers down for Inej, and even essentially giving Wylan an empire (though I have no doubt Kaz plans on utilizing that at some point in the future). Bardugo left the ending for the book in a nice place. It can be complete here, the story lines from the first book are all closed, the characters each got a wrap-up, but it's also left open enough that she could come back and write more about the Dregs without it feeling forced or unnatural. I, personally, really want to know more about what Inej (Inej-Kaz team?) and the Jesper-Wylan team are up to, since I know we'll probably get to see more about Nina and the Grisha in King of Scars . Like SoC, the plot was mostly character-driven, but there was a lot of action and high-stakes moments throughout the story. There were twists I did and didn't see coming and, overall, I'm pretty happy with how the book went.

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