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#but im obsessed with running projects like this
cheswirls · 10 days
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looking @ old fic i started when i was 14/15 is so funny bc im realizing once again why i never mark fics as abandoned even if its been literal years since i've touched them. specifically i was checking docs for stuff i started and either did or didn't post to ffn.
and its like. nothing is bad??? like i can see where my outside-the-box ideal of fic writing comes from. not just fics but writing in general, i'm p sure. even if it's a total cliche plot setup, there are details on each that rly make it stand out like oh yeahhhhhh i did have this great idea once upon a time.
funny too bc was it executed well in prose??? no absolutely not i wrote like shit when i was 15. would i revive an idea one day and revise it to be less cliche or cringy while still keeping the stand-out elements??? yea maybe. i might. everything i'm currently working on that i started from 2021 up to now still holds my supreme interest, but like i'm not gonna say never.
esp since i write fic first and foremost for my own need and specifically what i like to read, it makes it impossible to consider an idea i've thought extensively about "not worth writing anymore". anyway not making this too long i jus found everything interesting to consider
#writing#this fic i pulled up from JUNE 2014 crazy was the old chosenshi au i was trying to write for a friend#i dont ship blue/silver and never will and thats prolly why i never finished it#but i do still like!! the idea of rocket!blue raised w silver and breaking free of tr while running the hoenn branch#no idea how i remembered bc it wasnt in the plot pts on the doc but she was gonna get sent to the battle frontier#to nab jirachi and have encounters w frontier brains and change her mind at the end of it all#hell i could go back and not make it ship fic at all - have silver be a little one-sided obsessed or#even jus like.. attached to blue as a rivalry like as a way to show her up at every turn#another fic around the same time was the old pokespe hs au where i changed all the dexholder's names for some reason#i have no idea where i was in reading spe bc i put lyra in for some reason and had the sinnoh trio even tho i never read past v2 of dp#idk if it was more gameverse or what but its so funny looking @ the ship list n seeing i had gold paired w black#bc i had manga!ss and manga!ferriswheel so was it rly speverse or was i projecting????#actually i think black was supposed to die and gold was gonna go thru this whole thing abt grieving#looking at the ship list so funny bc i never shipped gold/crys or entourageshi#and clearly i did not know the superiority of pmshi if i threw lyra in jus for silver#god but i do love (most!) of the alt names i gave them#would absolutely fuck up the ship list if i ever redid it tho#also have perfectworld tho im sure i have the most recent rewrite on pen and paper somewhere#that one i also gave up bc the idea i had for flare!sycamore was cringe along with#every time i went back to work on it enough time passed that i thought my writing sucked#i rewrote that damn thing so many times but oooooooo i still love the idea#as long as i changed the cringe parts to smth better i could still rock w most of these#that fic rly had everything... psychic!korrina. leaf/serena. sycamore hacking the secret to mega evo. lys/syc that ends in failure#bc of the ending line i will never forget > only in a perfect world could you and i be together. destined and doomed from the start#im rambling n im boutta run outta tags gimme a sec
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autisticredhood · 2 years
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happy jasons 1st death day!!!! here is a draft of something i was working on back when i was going insane over bruce’s grief 
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opens-up-4-nobody · 10 months
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...
#ay. looking forward to the future when im back in therapy#like i dont feel terrible rn. i dont exactly kno how to describe it. i feel like ive been tossed up onto the shore of a desert island#after a big storm. like im still lying facedown in the sand bc i dont kno what to do when i stand up#i guess im just still sitting in the desolation of 2yrs of burnout and i kno that things need to change but i dont kno#quite how to manage it. bc the thing abt me is that i have ambiguous handwave undiagnosed obsessive compulsive behaviors#and its like every. everything i do is. like its structure to the extreme. i have to do these things because. because why? idk just because#so im like ok i have to change things so i adjust to the change and the structure just becomes rigid again. the cage changes shape but the#volume stays the same. and its hard bc i cant run rn so its like i cant expell my frustration and its a compulsion i cant fulfill and its#constantly in my head. im also just tired. ive been sleeping more than usual and idk y. like i dont feel that depressed but i guess i do#feel bored and pointless bc im just doing computer stuff rn. and i also just feel like my brain is cloudy#like learning is a thing i like to do but im not allowed to spend time reading papers bc i have to draw bc thats the structure#but i want to learn abt those specific topics and i just feel like my brain is full of holes#like its a very specific feeling. like back after i 1st finished my masters i was taking carbon measuments bc thats#like the most useful thing for me to do in tbus lab but it destroys my brain and then my boss was training me in some culture isolation#stuff that i liked a lot and was more aligned with my interests but i hit this wall where my Brain was like ur not allowed to do that#anymore so i make the choice to let the project go and just do what was useful. idk y i did that but i do it all thr time. idk its just hard#when like everything feels so boring and bleak all the time but with this little glimmers of specialness that im not allowed to reach for#ugh. its just the hormones. bc it's becoming very clear i have high and low moods associated with hormone shifts. and the obsessive#compulsive behaviors. those r just ambient but at time exacerbated by the shifts#unrelated#also participating in trivia stuff triggers me feeling dumb lmao but idk i dont usually memorize facts. i usually go for vibes and like what#do u build with what youve learned. like who gives a fuck if u kno a set of facts if u dont do anything with that info#but thats just me being defensive bc i have a foggy brain full of holes
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orcelito · 8 months
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Just found out about Sneaker Pimps
It's all over for me
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i think everybody should have a hand craft. something where they sit and create with their hands. preferably something physical simply for the pure joy of getting to hold ur creations. fucking. get back into perler beads like you did when you were 7 bro, go make shit with ur hands!
#finishing crochet projects makes my brain release all the good happy accomplishment chemicals#its like stupid. here i am holding the roundest lil creature known to man. and brain becomes sparkles and glitter#like any nd person. i have trouble completing projects. but the reward is so wonderful#with crochet. i just dont allow myself to take the project off the hook. cant start a new project if my favorite hook is occupied#i also have monkey brain but some kinda bonkers obsessive issues. so i make it a /thing/ to finish the project and make it /good/#the only think keeping my monkey brain from being debilitating are my obsessive tendencies#all my isms run in my family. and. the final outcome is always addiction of some sort. but my dad and i have made it work#i should clarify that im not currently addicted to anything. it's just like. what the pattern says will eventually happen#technically. have been addicted before so. already happened. but itll prolly happen again#look. the point. the point is. that everyone deserves to have really good physical hobbies that they get to commit to#commitment is hard but committing to your crafts. even one that only slightly intrigues you. is so worth it#i actually hate crochet half the time. and then i finish a project. and its like the lil animal crossing sparkle emote#i feel as passionately about this as i do the importance of one weekly irl friend interaction and daily outside time#which. ik i havent talked about here before. but like. brain and body will appreciate all of it#if u can go more than a week without seeing ur best friend and feel fine. then you are a stronger man than my bff and i#it's like 5 days for us and then we both start to get antsy. which. u wouldn't think happen since we talk 24/7 anyways#and and! outside time. daily outside time. i walk around my house perimeter if i have nothing else outside to do#its stupid and i hate it but ooga booga brain needs to be in sun otherwise brain shut down#i quite literally hate getting the motivation to do it. but then i go back inside afterwards and feel so happy. and its so stupid#brain and body so complex and also so not all at once. trials and tribulations
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broodygaming · 2 months
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People in the discord server I'm in for game jam stuff are talking about different designs and things people do. And one person mentions they don't like playing suggestive games. Two people in the game jams make often... Idk how to put it. Big boob lady games. It's not Terrible terrible? But it does make me eye roll and make me be more careful with my words so I'm being polite and not like, talking down to them too much.
So shoutout to that other girl who was just like "nah I don't play those they make me uncomfortable" haha, you rock.
Also it made me chortle a bit cuz I realized that now three of my main characters in a row wear baggy sweaters and my first character before that was a small child.
Idk, I don't get the "bobba" thing. they'll all like, titter and laugh about it. Ohh, look at her walking cycle her pixel "bobbas" move, ohhh. It's weird. Can boobs just be boobs please. It's just. It's. ugh.
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devilfruitdyke · 8 months
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lowkey crushing on an old friend but in kind of an obsessed way like hey girl can we do world domination together
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norman-fucking-reedus · 3 months
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I’m absolutely obsessed with your writing! I was hoping I could request a one-shot where Daryl and fem!reader are married. They are working on separate outdoor projects but Daryl can’t stop watching the reader throughout the day. The dirtiest thoughts cross his mind as he watches her. Later that evening when they are home and finally alone he recreates all those thoughts with her throughout the night. Daryl has a pleasure and praise kink, includes oral, Daryl loves going down on the reader!
*Set during later Alexandria or Commonweath era (Daryl never goes to France!)
STOP IT RIGHT TF NOW ANON CAUSE WHY HAVENT I THOUGHT OF A PLEASURE KINK. DROOLING RN
Heres me admitting im only on season 9 of TWD so this takes place in Alexandria 😿
。・:*:・゚★,。・:*:・゚☆
Daryl was going to simply pass away and die.
He hated his own mind for it’s never-ending thoughts, even more so when he had a literal job to be doing. His racing thoughts had been distracting him the whole day, occasionally using the wrong tool, knocking something over, and even almost spilling all the oil at one point.
It was just the way your hips looked, so well rounded in those jeans, shirt clinging to your body as you walked quickly with your own tasks in mind, not noticing your husband’s hardcore staring.
His mind was bursting with thoughts of what horribly dirty things he wanted to do to you. Sometimes he physically can’t wrap his head around how he ended up with someone like you. All Daryl could think about was just how bad he wanted to fuck you, cock already stirring to life in his pants.
No. No. He had to stay focused. He couldn’t be seen not doing his task and also now needed to hide the tent forming in his pants. It was worse that he was out in the open, having been assigned to work on the cars to keep them running longer.
You had been assigned to ask around to see what was needed for the next run, only for some reason you had timed yourself to get to everyone in under an hour, hence your quick pace and focused gaze. Daryl had seen you walk past at least three times, each time you sped past while furiously scribbling on a notepad. He felt like a teenager watching and obsessing over his crush.
God, he was so ready to blow himself up, staring down at under the hood of one of the cars used for runs. He forced his mind to focus on fixing shit instead of wandering off. Rick had been saying that the brakes had been failing, only Daryl couldn’t exactly do much without a jackstand.
He decided to test the car battery instead since it had been having trouble starting. Stepping around the car to the toolbox, he almost tripped as you bumped right into him. “Bulky bitch!” You yelped as you fell down onto your ass, dropping your pen and paper. Daryl gently but quickly pulled you to your feet, picking your stuff up. “Tha’ hell ya runnin’ from girl?” He stepped closer to you, sliding a hand to your waist. “I’m a very busy woman with places to be and times to beat” You rolled your eyes, yet smiled softly at Daryl. “Too busy fer me now?” You nodded, leaning up as if to kiss him but going for his ear instead. “Very busy” You whispered sweetly, placing a faint kiss on his cheek before speeding away again.
Daryl simply stood there with his cock straining harshly against the fabric of his pants, cock pulsating as he could feel himself leaking pre-cum. He should just blow his goddamn brains out, now.
He slammed the hood of the car shut and climbed inside, dropping his head onto the steering wheel. It felt like his head was about to fall off with how many filthy thoughts were flooding in. You were the biggest tease and absolutely knew it, sweat dripping down his face as he tried to silence his brain, hands gripping the steering wheel. He wasn’t about to jerk off inside a car with the clearest windows ever, at that point he might as well do it out in the open.
While Daryl was suffering silently, you were simply serene as you rocked on the porch swing of your house, turning in the list to Rick right before your timer hit fifteen minutes. You toyed with the ring on your finger, smiling down as you thought of how Daryl refused to get you something small. He had found a jewelry shop out on a secret run and spent an hour overthinking and questioning himself before finding the perfect ring. It was a sliver band with clusters of smaller diamonds around a larger one that so happened to be the shape of a skull, matching the one he wore every day. He smashed the glass without a second thought.
You smile fondly, also remembering that the same man was probably struggling to do his work. Getting him super worked up was your favorite thing to do as he basically melted in your hands the second he stepped foot inside.
Speaking of inside, you had stepped in earlier to change out your underwear, switching into a black thong you found. You could practically feel Daryl’s hands roaming your body, shivers running down your spine at the tingling sensation.
Whilst you were enjoying yourself, Daryl was still sitting in the car, staring down at the steering wheel as he tried to focus his mind on anything else, aside from the cocky sway of your hips, and the ghost of your lips against his ears.
He needed to get off badly. The only thing really stopping him were these shitty windows, however he proceeded to begin rubbing his hand on his clothed cock, letting out a shaky moan. Daryl slammed his hands back onto the steering wheel, gripping it tightly as he tried to recenter himself. He thought for a moment, sweat rolling down the back of his neck.
The car door swung open and he kicked it shut behind him, walking quickly to avoid anyone who might wanna talk, quickly making his way back home. He passed Carol, who was sitting out on her swing. She waved and he gave a short wave back, trying his hardest to keep his hard-on concealed as he sped past.
He stepped heavily up the stairs, the wooden porch creaking under his weight as he opened and shut the front door. It was remotely quiet as he kicked his shoes off next to yours, tearing his shirt off as he stomped upstairs to your shared bedroom, where he found you in one of his shirts lying on your stomach reading a book, closing it at the sound of your husband's arrival. “Already stripping nude for me, Dixon?” You pushed yourself onto your knees and he approached the bed, grabbing your face rougher than intended and crashing his lips onto yours.
It seemed like in that moment, Daryl’s hyperactive mind finally shut itself down, his shoulders relaxing as his hands held your soft face, licking into your mouth desperately. Your hands wrapped around his neck, fingers splayed out on his upper back as he moved to join you on the bed, readjusting you so your legs rested comfortably on either side of his hips. There was a burning desire in his gut as he sucked harshly on your skin, grinding against you as he did.
Daryl’s hands stayed locked at your hips, massaging and groping the flesh as he continued marking up your whole body, practically eating you. He reached your boobs and ran his tongue over the right one and started to suck deep marks into the sensitive flesh.
His hips picked up speed, becoming erratic before burying his face in space between your boobs, shaking as he literally came in his pants. It was the hottest thing you’d seen. “Feeling better?” You whispered breathlessly, watching him groan and lift himself sluggishly off your chest. “M’not done yet” His words were slightly slurred as he leaned back on his knees, hands fumbling to undo his pants.
You eventually reached down to unzip his zipper, and he was back on you instantly, shoving his boxers down enough to free his hard and dripping cock, precum pouring from the puffy tip. “God, Daryl, you’re so needy tonight” You moaned as he pulled down your pajama shorts, eyes staring down at the black thong. “Yes tha’ hell I am” He whispered, hands sliding up your sides and he slid down, cock pulsing as he got a look at your cunt even with the thong on. There was just so much he wanted to do to you that it was overwhelming his senses.
He ran his tongue up and in between your folds, tasting you through the measly garment. He rubbed circles in your clit as his tongue explored every inch, slipping past the thong and into your entrance, causing your brain to short-circuit as he worked you to release, especially since his own was drying in his underwear. Alongside his tongue, Daryl eased two fingers in, stretching and scissoring you open, his tongue going in much deeper and curling. “Fuck yes, baby just like that” You bit your bottom lip harshly, sliding your own fingers down to stimulate your clit, knowing how to push yourself off the edge quicker. He got so fucking hard at the sight of you playing with yourself, even more so that it was your ring finger, the diamond skull standing out as your fingers sped up. Daryl pulled his tongue out, continuing to move his fingers as he licked your clit, a strangled sob coming from you as you came.
Daryl settled for unleashing another attack on your torso while you recovered from your orgasm, licking, kissing, sucking, and biting at the smooth flesh of your stomach, one hand holding your thigh over his shoulder, and the other resting right by your boob, his thumb teasingly stroking the skin under it. He felt every curse, moan and gasp you let out, licking right in between your already marked boobs, kissing the junction of your throat all the way up to your lips. The head of his cock nudged your pussy slightly, and the heat of the kiss had you dizzy. “C’mon handsome, I can’t wait much longer” You batted your lashes at him, running your hand down his one of his big arms, your ring shimmering in the dim lamp light.
Your other hand slid in between your bodies to shift your soaked thong to the side, pulling him closer by wrapping your legs around his waist. He used one hand to steady his cock, and gripped the headboard as he slammed in, two of you moaning in unison. Daryl’s cock was more sensitive than ever, eyes rolling to the back of his skull as he readjusted himself, pounding roughly into you as you gripped his bicep.
Daryl’s thrusts were relentless as he kept his pace up, bed creaking and headboard slamming as he panted like a dog, watching the way his cock was sliding in and out of you, a giant wet spot forming on his jeans as he showed no signs of stopping. “My big strong man, always fucking me so good with your fat cock” You bit down on your lips as one of your hands came to rest on his cheek. He turned his face to the side, kissing your palm while staring into your eyes with a lovingly lustful gaze. “M’all yers, m’gon always give my woman wha’ she wants” His voice was raspy and breathless against your hand before he locked your fingers together, pinning your hands onto the mattress and dipping his head down to press his forehead against yours, simply panting into each others spaces.
From how tightly you were holding hands, your rings dug into one another’s fingers, and it only turned Daryl on more. You were his and he was yours. “M’so proud ta call ya Mrs. Dixon. Gon fill ya up w all my kids” He whispered, bumping his strangely cold button nose against yours. “Let’s just start with one?” Your voice sounded foreign to your ears, and by the way Daryl’s hips had sped up you could tell he was close “Not one now!” You shrieked, nails digging into his hands as he railed your sweet spot, orgasm already hitting him incredibly hard as he practically laughed in your ear from how hard he came, pulling out just a little too late.
He fell on top of you, but recoiled when something wet touched his navel, eyes flickering down to see his cum soaking into the black fabric of your thong and seeping out your hole. “Gonna clean that up for me?” You winked suggestively at him, and he lowered himself to be eye level with your messy cunt, massive hands spreading you further apart as he licked his lips. “Yes ma’am”
。・:*:・゚★,。・:*:・゚☆
I made myself very horny writing this but I also kept falling asleep as I was writing
also I based both rings off Normans ring :3 (he should put his finger in my body)
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© norman-fucking-reedus 2024. I do not give permission for my works to be copied, modified, or adpated to any other platform. You may translate my works with my asked and given consent.
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thatdeadaquarius · 11 months
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Have some more language brainrot for your brainrot
Writer reader getting kind of insecure that even if they write something nobody will understand it, so when Al haithem askes you if he can keep a draft or two just for analyzing, there's hesitant agreement but ultimately you tell him to please burn the documents once he's done. They're too awkward to look at now...
Only he doesn't burn them, in fact he ends up recruiting several people close to the creator with knowledge of olden speak to analyze them. A funeral parlor consultant well known for his historical knowledge, a 500 year old shrine maiden who owns and runs her own publishing house, and a bard who somehow butted his way in on the project. None of them could resist the opportunity to witness the creator's sacred scriptures with their own eyes.
Needless to say, the papers ended up being fought over and have been making their rounds around your acolytes. It started with Ei, who insisted that as an archon she also should see the creator's work with her own eyes. Then once Ningguang found out, she ordered they be handed over to a team of literary analysts in order to be properly handled and deciphered. Things got really messy quick, but have luckily come to a halt as none of the acolytes want the creator to know their random writings are being fought over.
Especially when it comes to the creator's sullen additute. Their acolytes first have to convince their holiness that their inability to read and understand the creator's writing shouldn't prevent you from doing what you love. In fact... could they convince you to write some more?
WRITER OR READER WITH TALENTS HAS MY WHOLE HEART LIKE-
On one hand, same 💀 id be terrified for my all time fav skrunklies to see my bs
But at the same time i rlly wanna show them goddamit- THANK U FOR THE BRAIN FOOD IM RUNNING LAPS AROUND MY HOUSE THINKING ABT THIS-
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Sun: Gender Neutral Reader (they/them), Writer!Reader
Planet: Language Shenanigans
Orbit: Scenario
Stars: Alhaitham mostly, some of Kaveh, mentions of other Sumeru characters
Comets & Meteors: Content Warnings: Insecure about craft/writing, anxious first pov (not serious),
& Trigger Warnings: Mild Negative self-talk, insecure perspective/reader “you”, possible anxiety depiction.
You were not a very confident writer.
This had been an avoidable feeling ever since you picked up a pen for the first time and were asked to write a story for school.
You were always anxious turning in essays, letting friends proofread them, anything that would expose your writing to more eyes, because you’d learned the hard way early on that as you get older and better at something, the stuff from the beginning… starts to look a lot different than you remember.
things you used to be proud of after having completed them in the moment, were something you struggled not to rip to shreds a year or two after you re-found it.
If it weren’t for other writers advising holding onto old work so you can see your progress over time, you’d have probably literally nothing older than one year on your ao3, wattpad, etc…
So when you had the fortunate luck (no it is not unfortunately, you are very happy to be here tbh) to fall headfirst into your video game you’ve been obsessed with lately,
You were not planning on showing them any of your writing.
Why would you, after all? You’ve got the weapons, the artifacts, everything they need to be more powerful. Why would you show them a silly little story you wrote? Fanfic or otherwise, not that theyll recognize any characters besides themselves, but still.
Alhaitham, bc ofc it was alhaitham, cocky, deviously aware bastard he is, caught you writing in your spare time first.
You’d gotten your hands on an old journal (if made you feel better than something completely new, a nice worn leather journal, sold at a secondhand shop from an old adventurer) and had started to write what you could remember about some of your ideas you’d had drafts for in your old world
After initially walking in on you writing in the House of Daena (it was the closest you could get to lofi girl, god u missed her lmao), you nearly jumped a foot in the air bc Haitham’s a nosy bitch and leaned over your shoulder and scared the absolute shit out of you, mans goes from asking politely, to begging you to let him read some of your writing over the course of 3 weeks (a month really)
Finally, after this 6 ft (about 180cm) man leans down one day (you’re sitting writing again), and gives you the most insanely good?? puppy dog eyes??? you’ve ever seen on a man???
you give in, revise a draft about 5 times in a row, lose sleep bc ur having a breakdown about alhaitham judging ur writing the night before you give him his copy-
and hand over a small short story for him to read. you specifically leave a little note not to judge you so hard for Haitham bc u werent used to people reading ur work/let alone someone as highly academic as him, ESPECIALLY since your speech is already so much more archaic than his/all of Teyvats-
His stupid green eyes with diamonds look into your soul (are they sparkling??) and he braces your shoulders after you give him his copy,
“Mine Greatest Guide, you hath deemed this one worthy of thy trust of your creations personally, I would be a fool to gaze upon it in jest. To take this work as anything less than a masterpiece in its infant stages.”
…you just leave him to it, and are nearly running out of there (u managed to be calm enough to just speedwalk),
and you make a point to not ask what he thought about it, or even bring it up at all
you’re kind of hoping he forgot tbh… and so nothing happens!
Nothing happens… for 2 weeks after you gave Haitham a copy of your short story.
You still don’t know Alhaitham’s opinion when you see the advertisement, a sign saying something about, a new book? By YOU???
You nearly start a mob because the shopkeeper insisted you sign some copies, but you only signed a few before too many people overwhelmed you, and seeing it was that same draft- !! Oh god, you’d been agonizing over the spelling errors you’d missed when you gave it to Alhaitham, and now it’s just out there???
(luckily it seems the reviews are positive, but dammit you’ve been rereading ur story u gave him for days, and now ur positive it’s shit-)
You make a break for it, and are literally running (more like speed-walking after a while, since u got further away) thru Sumeru City:
you pass by the open patio of a restaurant, the scholars are heatedly discussing ur characterization-
you pass by Dehya, Candace, and Dunyazard, the merc is waving around a copy of ur book, the other two women look excited abt the conversation-
oh my god-
Nahida is relaxing in one of the many little gazebos thruout Sumeru, while Wanderer seems to be reading your story to her-
You fucking track down Alhaitham’s house like a bloodhound.
You are banging the infamous gay roommates’ front door, panting til ur throat burns raw.
“Yes, yes, alright, greetings to you too! I was simply visiting the Acting Grand Sage Alhaitham, tis why I’m here- Greatest Lord?!”
Kaveh is nearly jumps a foot in the air at the sight of you, but recovers, (you’re still not tho lmao)
and invites you in bc apparently, Alhaitham’s been meaning to talk to you about your draft you gave him!
Oh yeah, you’ve got some words to give Haitham after giving him that damn draft privately-
But when he sees you, the fucker just- smiles??
Like he’s done nothing wrong???
You’re about to tear into him when he speaks first to tell you the good news!
He grabs your hands at the table and gets down on one knee, ohhhh no.
Alhaitham is giving you those damn begging puppy dog eyes again.
“My Greatest Lord, Giver of Power, and Guide to All, your exquisite story has entranced all of Teyvat, might I please insist you write a sequel? It is an excellent literary piece to analyze… or perhaps, even better, share other stories you’ve written??”
….Motherfucker.
Hello I’m alive! I just took a longer-than-usual break between posts from those last 2 mammoth pieces about gifts,
1: bc they were a lot to write in between writing other stuff like fanfics im already working on lol 2: I got busy with holidays and trying to apply to jobs!
Not that I’m still not doing that.. but you get what I mean!
Safe Travels Anon,
That being said, as you’ve probably noticed, I’ve made a kofi! so if you ever liked my writing (hot mess it is) and want to show me some love, feel free to leave a tip! :]
Iced coffee?? :0
💀♒
♡the beloveds♡
@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist / @thedevioussmirk / @the-dumber-scaramouche
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You could drink your whole life away and still never get that taste out of your mouth.
half commission for @salempie half completely self indulgent dreck pieced together from our insane conversations abt franke and elka. told myself id finally write a big explanation for all of the dum shit between these two for context so Thats Under The Cut.
so I already wrote some stuff about elka and franke's relationship back in whispering rock so feel free to look at that too . it goes over elkas blindness/‘seeing’ with clairvoyance and how her and franke started talking & all that good stuff
SO FOR STARTERS. a lot of thsi wont make sense without a big breakdown of elka herself. because elkas potential as a character is like insane to me. like just the idea of her in the long run of her life reads as something so potentially tragic; a young girl whos plagued with visions of doom and destined to be an outcast even in her own home for things she cant control and clings to the One vision of her wedding that she thinks is 'happy' even despite the fact she doesnt really love the person in it. im choosing to take the li-po doc as canon here because its funny shes the only one with backstory-
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but my fucking god even the smallest look into what her parents are like is soo fucked up to me. and i do think elka especially gets a lot of influence from her mother; its funny how easily you can fit mabel doom into a box just from what elka says about her. knees deep in an avon-esque pyramid scheme and leaning into her daughters depressing ass visions & taking her to therapy at age 11 (which would be good if not for the kind of person you can already assume she is & so i doubt the therapist she has really does her any good. i think they share one). she reads as a very I Am My Daughters Best Friend type of mom to me and i can see elka being a centerpiece of the conversation when she has her Amway Girls over for drinks. wine-mom that lets her kid sip from the glass so she can feel like a big girl type deal.
and you can tell that elka is trying to hard to be too mature for her age even in her campster posts. how she writes letters to nils' mom and exchanges baking recipes with her and that feels like she really only interacts with middle aged women and not really many people her own age outside of camp (like her moms friends). which makes sense shed feel the need to ‘grow up’ early when shes probably had to process so many hard things at a young age bc of her visions.
theres a lot of filling the blanks here of course.
elka obsesses over nils to an overbearing degree even despite the fact he treats her like shit ('you promised no talking' and so on) and she treats him bad right back. she leans onto stereotypical heterosexual ideals like taking care of him and overblowing how Manly and Protective JT is and she admires romance stories like pride and prejudice and it feels like she Projects Soooooooo much of what she wants onto boys she barely feels anything for without knowing what its actually supposed to feel like. and clearly she WANTS that ideal future, a happy marriage, an actual romance- but according to nils even when they were dating she ignored him most of the time, which just seems Very Telling
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like shes filling a role, overcompensating for emotions and lacktherof she cant digest quite yet, and it only makes more sense when you know shes had visions of their future together. how could that be bad for her? shouldnt it be like the books and movies? but she doesnt really connect the fact that her visions are only for Doomed futures, and if she does she certainly doesnt show it. Doomed relationships. it's been a part of her family for generations and she isn't turning out much different, is she? i dont think she even realizes thats all she ever sees yet, just that its Going to happen. that it's Her future, and it always will be
and like, her only reference for a real marriage so far has been her own parents, and she already Knows they have an affair, and theyre doomed to split, (and i actually like to think they were in rough waters anyway and elka was a child meant to mend a crumbling marriage but thats a whole other thing) and so without a framework for what an actual healthy relationship is supposed to be like she cant really grasp that her relationship with nils Isnt that and isnt ever going to be. she can only cling to this one happy idea of the future, and thats why she keeps chasing him, self fulfilling the actuality of her situation and creating and fostering the unhappy life they will inevitably live together.
and that bleeds into everything else in her life, of course, because as the years go on, as the visions grow in number it just makes sense for her to fall into the predictability of her life. she always knows whats going to happen, her visions are Never wrong- so why try to change things? shes had time to process tragedies days, weeks, months, years before they happen, shes had time to settle into every crack of her life. her parents divorce, her various break ups, her future with the psychonauts.
“and she's already seen so much of a future with [nils] she feels trapped almost. Like she has to be happy in it or else it just means her life is miserable. And it's a mixture of pride and fear of the unknown that keeps her clinging to the One thing she knows. BUT LIKE!!! She knows what's gonna happen! It's easier to grieve when she's been grieving for years... She wants so badly to be happy, But to do that she has to step into the unfamiliar. And that's more terrifying than staying the same miserable person she's always been.”
and thats where franke comes in— and yeah you Do have to take a lot of liberties for frankes character since it’s basically, like, all the info for her is just that shes a Supreme Baby Dyke but thats enough for me. i think she has protective butch itch in her . on campster shes defensive over other women evidenced in the way she keeps watch over the girls cabins for lili when elton is pursuing her . but shes also eager to please and constantly trying to make kitty laugh and also Very naive. but she tries! and i think it only solidifies more as she gets Older and really gets a hold of her feelings & her powers. this is incredibly franke to me
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and i think as they grow older together— because i think franke and elka Do stay friends, both because elka is just pathetic and needs that positive connection even if she doesnt realize it and because i think franke is a very Loyal person & annoyingly persistent if you let her be . and i am also a kitty/franke truther. because kittys also important in this web we weave
because i think franke and kitty stay together after camp, to a point— theres a falling out facilitated on kittys end and they break up, but reconnect, and franke kind of... saves kitty from herself a little, from her strict military father whos love only extends thru finances , from her own stifling future , she drives all the way to bakersville in her shitty van handmedowned from her dad and they move in together eventually . they get jobs at the motherlobe , because it’s a pipeline to a decent job, because it’s whats easy, because franke doesn’t really have a future, because she’s never really been good at much, because shes never had much sense, because franke doesnt really care as long as she can live and help, sometimes, if she can, and because kitty’s there, and because elka’s there, and shes so used to being elkas eyes now and shes good at it. shes good at being the muscle of the missions when her colleagues lack it, when hypnosis and predictions arent enough. she likes it that way.
and elka appreciates frankes company. she listens, shes sweet, she does little things for her that no ones ever really put the effort for before; she likes her. franke is strong and bold and makes her laugh and shes always there but god elka cant let go of that future, of that box shes put herself in, that her mothers put her in, of being a Good Wife to a Loving Husband, of getting married normally and falling into unfailing familiarity. thats all shes ever wanted and shes not going to jeopardize that . not for franke, who may not be a boy but is handsome like one, whos always held her after every break up with nils and the men that filled empty days inbetween.
and elka is too stubborn to recognize those feelings anyway. too prideful to accept a way out. too set in her cycle no matter how much she hates it, her little self fulfilling tragedy of her own making, wallowing in her own doom. she struggles for control of her own life when she feels like every choice has been made for her anyway, she puts up her walls and carefully constructs what people see. but franke was always harder to trick, because while empathy isnt a particularly useful psychic power it’s certainly an inconvenient one. all franke has to do is get too close and all those carefully crafted walls fall apart, and elkas control is gone, and thats all she really has. and she tries to distance herself, really she does, but franke is also too persistent. and elka wears gloves, keeps contact that would make her walls crumble from happening as best as she can, but she cant really keep herself from the brief moments where she feels like someone actually fucking cares about her.
and that slightest lack of control, the need to wrestle it back is why she proposes to nils the next time theres a falling out— she knows how it happens, she plans every detail. and he accepts, despite everything. gets her a cheap ring and it feels like lead on her finger and its nothing at all like how shed thought it to be when she was a kid, theres no feather light feeling in her chest, only that dreadful reality that she cant turn this back. BUT WHAT CAN U DO LMAO
elka doesnt tell franke about this engagement until later, on their way back from a mission. late at night when neither of them can sleep, and franke invites elka to smoke in her van, because its been so long since theyve been alone like that, because elkas been so strangely absent lately. and because of everything, because frankes always so damn nice, because elka hates the feel of the ring on her finger, because she let herself get high alone with franke fucking athens whos always been so good at pulling her apart— the truth of it all spills out and its messy and emotional and she hates it, she hates the life shes made for herself, but franke makes it easier to bare and now shes here and shes so close and god she wishes she could see her smile again, she wishes she could see franke, thats all she needs right now and she cant but she can touch her and she can hold her and for tonight, she can be known, she can let those walls crumble, she can be something else just for once here with franke . she can kiss her here in this van, touch that happiness for just a moment, and forget the future that waits for her outside of it. franke begs her to forget the wedding, to just let herself be happy— and god, she wants to, but it means turning her back on everything shes known and everything shes saw to be inevitable, and franke has never been in her future, so if it were supposed to work out why hadnt she seen it and she cant, she cant take that risk but she can have this, even if its temporary, she can have it.
and just as soon as she gets a taste of it, its gone. after that night, after the missions over and theyre back at the motherlobe and have to pretend like nothing happened (franke doesnt, of course she tells kitty about it, she tells kitty about everything.) but that brief moment together haunts elka every time she sees franke, sees herself through frankes eyes, sees herself in her wedding dress because god its all franke can think about! of course it is! she knows how much elkas destroying herself she knows how much misery shes wallowing in that kiss in the van felt like an emotional punch to the teeth and she hasnt ever forgotten it and all she can do is sit and watch while elka throws herself into a loveless marriage. she can come to her wedding and see the way the bride and groom kiss with the emotional weight of a wet towel no matter how hard elka tries to hide it under a pretty dress and bouquets of flowers and meticulous planning.
and elka resents nils but she cant really hate him, its not his fault, not really. he feels trapped just like she does and his feelings of misery only cycle back into hers . they fight and gnash and wear away at each other and its a relationship thats crashed and burned a million times before elka even said i do. and its inevitable that she falls into her mothers habits, a sip of wine here and there to loosen up, until it turns to a glass, until it falls into a bottle on nights when whatever work nils does runs late.
but franke’s still there. shes always been there, hasn’t she? always trying to play knight, always trying to save her, dragging her home when shes stumbling over herself because god who else is going to do it but her? who else is left to care? certainly not nils. never nils. because franke knows her. because franke pities her. shes always pitied her. shes always known. and elka hates it, she resents it, but god in the same breath she’s desperate for it, she envies it to her very bones. elka is a mess but after frankes done with her she has someone to go back to that loves her. and god what elka wouldnt do to have that. to take it and keep it for herself because shes never ever got to have that movie romance shes always wanted.
so now comes this.
because elkas particularly miserable and particularly spiteful and she needs to get franke to understand, just for a moment, drink with her and get on her level and she needs her there with her no matter how her pity makes her feel. no matter how much it makes her shake with anger and envy and desperation, but god the way franke looks at her, the way she still tries to salvage what they have, the soft, slurred way she tells her that it’s okay but its not okay, none of this is okay, it never has been and she just wants franke to shut up and see that, and if she cant then she’ll show her, she’ll show her all the raw angry desperation, with too much teeth and hands that claw and grab and she’ll know why everyones always said she’s too much.
and she knows this puts her on nils’ level too. that this makes her a cheater, that shes no better than he is now. no better than her father and his affair. but god, she wants to be selfish. she wants to be in control. just for once. she wants to feel right and she wants to feel happy and she wants to feel loved. thats all shes ever wanted. and franke will let her have that, just for a little while, at the very least.
anyway. sorry. sorry for being crazy . this isnt even getting into the shit after the comic takes place . elkas stupid brainworld thag she has to overcome in order to finally be allowed in the polycule and live happily ever as worlds first lesbian divorceman
sorry for all the shit i make up instead of caring about actual characters with screentime . bye !
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kennyluvr · 1 year
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#☕: main 4 — having a crush on you
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synopsis/concept: when each of the main 4 has a crush on you
warnings: none
author's note: i need wendy reqs or reqs for the girls please im desperate for a drop of inspiration 😔 also are my posts too long idk they all feel like whole ass novels
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kyle brovsloski
at first, kyle himself wasn't truly aware of the fact that he had a crush on you. he only realized when he found himself getting kind of disappointed whenever you talked to some of the other guys, and plotting ways to get into whatever activities or clubs you were in
but soon almost everyone knew of how head over heels he was 😭
he'd almost follow you around like a lost puppy, going along with everything you say, doing whatever you'd say or ask, and even participating in your weird or sometimes semi-hazardous ideas.
he didn't even mind when you would get sucked into the black hole that is walmart and spend hours there. the longer you wanted to shop, the longer he could stay with you
sometimes you would drag him by the hand through the aisles looking for something, and he'd pretend like he was bored, or he was unentertained. truthfully, he loved that you were even touching him, and the mildest physical affection from you makes him go feral
usually, you initiate any physical contact, but when kyle does he touches you like you're fragile. i feel like kyle's the type to playfully hit people, but he just taps you instead, whereas he'd accidentally knockout cartman or something 😭
he'd just think all day about how much you smiled or how happy you seemed sometimes,
he just enjoys to be close to you and being included in like everything you did. it's lowk obsessive, but in an endearing way i swear
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stan marsh
stan made it so obvious that he liked you 😭
literally everybody teased you both for it, but everybody was also lowk rooting for you two to start dating
because he would constantly be staring at you in every class and find every little excuse to talk to you or have an interaction with you. group project? he would come to you. he needs help with something? he'll come to you. you guys just worked so well together, he felt like it made sm sense
sometimes though, he'd get incredibly nauseous around you. he'd keep going to the bathroom every few minutes and you wouldn't know why. it was kind of weird, but you tried not to think too much of it.
he would always act incredibly awkward around you, and he'd get really flustered and anxious when talking to you or being around you, but you found it so cute <33 he wouldn't know what to say or how to act around you, afraid to say the wrong thing and scare you away.
he would be really sweet to you too. stan is generally really kind and polite to most other people, so you didn't think much of it at first, but you noticed something weird when it started to seem like he was trying to impress you.
he'd learn the songs you liked on his guitar and bring you to his house to play them for you. it's so endearing to him how you get so excited and shocked every single time he does it ☹️
he'd bring you little gifts and things that you like whenever he has the chance. if he happens to find a soda or a snack that you like when he's running to the bodega, he'll bring it for you the next day when he sees you.
AND stan is definitely the type to send you gym gain updates and tell you how much he benched you each day. he heard you talking about how you liked athletic and muscular guys with abs, so he makes sure to remind you almost daily about his sports abilities and stuff 💀
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eric cartman
just like stan, he'd try to impress you a lot, but being less obvious. he'd want to make himself appear more masculine and "tough." like, he'd be a lot more aggressive to his friends when you're near, and he would talk a lot louder. it would make him really willing to get into fights around you so that you could see how big and strong he is, too
cartman also would get REALLY jealous if other boys have your attention, and he'd do anything to grab your attention and draw it away from them. he'd pretend he needed your help with something, or act like someone was calling you for something
cartman's the type to be a little meaner to you if he likes you to convince himself you that he doesn't for some reason?? he'd try to play them off as jokes, though
he'd act like he hates you, but it's kind of clear he doesn't. when he's chewing the rest of his friends out, he often exempts you from some of his insults
"you guys are so STUPID, did you really think that was going to work? except for y/n obviously, but the rest of you are idiots."
you had a small feeling he liked you, but it was kind of unclear.
you and cartman were also really closer friends somehow, so you just considered that his bias to you might not be romantic
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kenny mccormick
kenny was sort of weirded-out when he realized he had a massive crush on you. he found himself fantasizing about every curve and dip in your body, and constantly thought about you.
and although you had a suspicion he liked you, you couldn't be entirely sure. kenny had the tendency to flirt with almost every girl he encountered (he's a little bit of a hoe) and he wanted himself to come off to you as confident to you
and he'd keep "jokingly" asking you to kiss or make out, hoping that eventually you'd agree and it would actually happen
but it was just the way that he got so flustered when you play along and flirt back with him even more intensely that gave him away. he'd start stuttering and blushing, trying to think of something to outdo you again
still, he'd restrict himself a little and think over his words thoroughly before he makes an effort to flirt with you, because he'd be scared he's going to scare you away or make you think he's weird.
he probably googles "how to be charismatic" or "how to make a girl like you back" just to make sure he gets it right 😭
he's literally smitten by you btw. everything you do is so attractive to him, and he talks about you to his friends almost 24/7, telling them about every single movement you made
he felt more at ease around you than most of his other friends too, so he felt safe bringing you over to his house. he knew you wouldn't make fun of him or nag him for it, unlike cartman or other people.
and when you met karen, you got along with her so well. kenny would rant about you to her and tell her all about you, and you were surprised that she knew you so well. and he loves how you always try to talk to her and be friendly to her. she's really shy, so you're one of the few people she finds herself comfortable around.
he loved when you started bringing him food or basic stuff for him and some of his family, at that point he was planning your wedding and looking for rings. he likes you because you're so considerate and kind to him, he just can't help it
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fandoms--fluff · 1 month
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Crushing Hard
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Hybrid female reader x Hope Mikaelson (+mikaelson family & caroline)
Summary: Hope has a massive crush on you, a girl who basically nobody knows anything about. And her family comes for a surprise visit, yay.
Warnings: swearing
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Hope has been a little obsessed with you, she admits it. She can't help but be attracted to you, you're crazy hot, not afraid to speak what you think, and your personality is amazing. And has she mentioned how drop-dead gorgeous you are?
The only setback is that you hate the school and basically everyone in it.
"You're drooling" Josie whispers into her ear. Hope snaps out of it, and brings a hand up to the corner of her mouth to find out it's completely dry. She rolls her eyes and looks up at Josie, frowning.
"Oh, you're crushing hard. Sorry for interrupting your daydream, but I'm pretty sure your family is here," Josie tells her, looking between Hope and some of her family.
"There are a bunch of newer kids this year, but still a lot of the older ones. I try to make the environment around here fully positive and happy." Caroline explains to the family. An amused snort comes from the couch a couple feet away.
"And you don't ever take a break" You glare at her. All their heads turn towards you. "This is y/n, one of the older students. I believe she came here a couple months before Hope did." Caroline sighs.
"You must be delusional because I did not come here willingly. You forced me. And still force me to be here every fucking day of the year" You stand up, crossing your arms, fury evident in your tons and stance.
"Werewolf?" Kol's the next one to speak. "I don't know, what do you think?" You snap at him before turning back to Caroline. "And that's the other thing, I've been here for how many years, and no one still knows what I am"
"You won't tell us" Caroline points out.
"Well, I would think considering you're apparently an expert on supernatural beings, and run a damn school for them, that you or anyone here would be able to tell like that" You snap your fingers at the end.
Klaus steps forward, not liking the way you've been talking to Caroline. "Oh, don't even start" You roll your eyes before he can get a word out.
"What?" Hope snaps her attention to her friend before looking in the direction Josie was a moment ago. To her surprise, her Dad, Mom, Auntie Rebekah, Uncle Kol, and Uncle Elijah are standing across the room, chatting with the headmistress, Caroline and you?
Oh no, Hope thinks to herself before getting out of her seat and quickly walking toward the group with Josie right behind her.
"Dad! What are you guys doing here?" Hope goes up to her father. "We came here for a surprise visit, but caught up in the wonderland tour," Kol told his niece, glancing at Caroline then at you.
You still have your arms crossed, leaning most of your weight on your right leg, making your left hip slightly pop out a bit more than the other.
Hope tries to keep her eyes off of you, not wanting her family or you to notice.
"Oh, nothing. Having a splendid fucking time!" You tell her in a fake cheery voice. You start walking away, "I like your shoes" you tell Rebekah before walking out of the room, your high heels clicking strongly as you do.
"She's mean..but sweet? I don't know" Caroline shakes her head. "She's like Katherine. I like her" Kol answers, smirking.
"Kol." Elijah says sternly to his little brother as Klaus galres at him.
Hope just stares at the ground, not wanting anyone to notice the flush that appeared on her face. "You okay Sweetie?" Her Mom asks. "Mhm. Uh I'm glad that you guys are here, but Josie and I have to finish a project. I'll, uh, catch up with you later" Hope tells them quickly before practically dragging Josie out of the room with her.
"What was that?" Josie asks her as Hope paces around Josie's room. Lizzie is planning a dance somewhere outside with a huge binder.
"I don't know, but now im pretty sure my family kost likely doesn't like Y/n. And if somehow my delusional relationship with her actually freaking happens then there's no point becuase there's a big chance my dad will get protective and ban her or kill her or something. Wait can she even die? I don't know, there's no way she can't die, right? Oh that would suck I'd she died before I can even make a move, or who am I kidding there's no way that's gonna happen. She probably hates me anyways. God, I'm so pathetic" Hope rants to her best friend.
"Okay, okay, calm down. You're not pathetic. You're just overthinking this way too much. There's no way Y/n hates you, I don't believe she does" Josie places her hands on Hope's shoulders, making her stop moving around.
Hope let's out a breath she didn't know she was holding in, then sighs, "I'm sorry."
"Nothing to be sorry for" Josie smiles.
You walk into the dining hall, only to be met with the same group of people. "Fucking great" you practically growl, rolling your eyes. You go over to the table lined with food and grabbed a piece of garlic bread.
As you're about to take a bite of it, a voice sounds. "Are you sure you're supposed to be eating that? It says no one is to touch the food" Elijah nods to the sign standing before the long table of food.
You glance at it then shrug, "Well too bad, I'm hungry and they don't exactly have any blood beside from fucking Thumper and Bambi" you take a bite of the garlic bread.
"So you're a vampire" Rebekah says. You twitch your eyebrow up, a smirk playing at your lips.
"Depends how you perceive it" you walk over to them, your eyes turning yellow and veins appearing under your eyes.
"A hybrid" Hayley's eyes widened a bit. "Did Hope turn you?" Klaus asks, not remembering himself ever turning you.
"Seriously? You think I'd let a girl who has a crush on me, sire me? I don't think so" you cross your arms.
"Crush?" Kol asks, knowing Hope has only told him about her crush on you. He wonders how you found out, cause there's no way his neice would've told you. Especially considering the interaction earlier today.
"Not that hard to figure out. Especially when her eyes are always on me, not the chalkboard in class" you cross your arms. "Oh, and Katherine was basically my sister, so that was a compliment back there" you smirk.
"Wait, if you're that old, what are you doing here?" Hayley asks.
"Well I'm pretty sure then Caroline would hate me more than she already does, then tell Damon and he would try to kill me, but it would end up with his head cut off his body and then Elena and everyone, and personally I don't have any fucking time or want for that. Though Damon being dead would be a bonus. So mind as well make some people, aka, Caroline miserable for a bit" you pop the rest of the garlic bread in your mouth.
"What? You still have that sappy crush on her?" You tease Klaus.
You turn around and walk out of the room. As you turn the corner, you run into Hope. She looks if you had a word, sheepish.
You sigh, realizing it, "You've been here the whole time, haven't ya?" You crossed your arms.
"Uh, yeah. Sorry," She turned before walking as fast as she could away from you. She had come down here to find her family, and instead heard you talking to them again and couldn't help but eavesdrop on the conversation.
She can't believe she's been so stupid. There's no way she's ever had any chance with you. And your acknowledging about her crush on you was just the cherry on top. She wishes she was anywhere but here now.
You look up, quietly groaning, not wanting her to find out like that. Both your age (well, sort of) and the knowledge of her crush.
You vamp in front of her in a split time of two seconds. "Look, I get it, I'm just some stupid girl who has a crush on a girl or woman I don't know! who's way out of my league. No need to rub it in my face!" She exclaims, trying not to let any tears cloud her vision.
"Hey! You're not some stupid girl, okay?" You tell her before she tries to walk away from you again. She lets out a harsh breath before looking up at you from the ground.
"And I'm not trying to rub anything in your face. Yes, I know you have a crush on me, but I don't want you to think anything bad about that. I'd never use it against you or make fun of you for it, or whatever you think I may do." You run your hands through your hair to keep it out of your face.
"And I've never thought about you in that way before, but I can say that I don't hate you as much as everyone else here," She snaps her gaze from the wall to your face, not expecting that. To have that said to her from you is basically like a simple 'I love you' to someone a person may have known for a while. It's also a really big compliment coming from you.
"So there's that" You walk closer to her before pressing a kiss on her cheek. You walk away, up the stairs to your room as Hope stands there frozen. That's one of the best solutions that could have happened at the moment, and she's practically screaming with joy on the inside.
She brings a hand up to the cheek you kissed and gently grazes her finger against the spot.
Her family then also comes down the hallway and up to her. "What happened, Sweetie?" Her mom asks, noticing her reddened face.
"Oh, n-nothing," She tells her, trying her best to hold back the grin that she has on the inside.
Kol looks from her hand placement and reddened face to her excited stance, putting two and two together. He catches her eye and smirks before mouthing 'good luck'.
That just makes her blush more than she already is if that's even possible.
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kolsmikaelson · 2 months
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— ANAKIN SKYWALKER NSFW ALPHABET
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NOTES - i’ve never wrote for ani before so i hope this is okay :)
WARNINGS - nsfw 18+ content, fem!reader, not proofread so ignore typos!
join my taglist or follow @rodrickhefley to see when i post
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A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
if theres time, he’ll run a bath and clean you both up, get you some water and then take you to bed, but if not he’ll still clean you up and ask if there’s anything he can do before you get back to what you were doing
B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
if he had to pick it would be his hands (or maybe im projecting). and on a partner i think he’s a boob guy honestly, doesn’t matter what size he’s still obsessed
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
loves when you squirt, he loves that it gets all over him and he also loves to come on your tits
D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
loves it when you spit in his mouth and make him swallow it, he thought he’d only be into it when he was doing it to you but the first time you did it to him, whew let’s say something in him changed that day
E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)
not super experienced, he was only ever with padme before you and they never had much time to have sex but he’s a quick learner
F = Favorite position ( goes without saying)
doggy, he loves that he has such easy access to slap your ass but also reach around your front and rub your clit
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)
he’s not scared to be a bit goofy with you, it’s not very often when it’s completely serious the whole time
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
he’s well groomed, he likes to keep it trimmed and neat for not only himself but his partner too
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
he’s loving and caring, will always make you get off 1-2 times before he even thinks about getting off himself
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)
doesn’t do it often, would rather you do it for him or fuck you than using his hand
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)
mommy kink, spit kink, choking (force choking mostly),
L = Location (favorite places to do the do)
his speeder. it’s usually in the middle of the night when everyone's in bed asleep already or during the day when there's just enough time to get away with it
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
seeing that pleading look on your face when asking him to fuck you, he gives in so easily
N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
nothing with bodily fluids (minus spit and cum), he won’t do anything where your face is covered in any way because he loves seeing the pleasured looks on your face way too much
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
giving. he’s a god at giving head and he knows it, but he wont turn down a blowjob either
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
he’s honestly a mix of both, it just depends on his mood. if he got back from a rough mission he’ll be fast and rough but if it was im the morning after you both wake up he’ll go slow and take his time
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
he’s obsessed with them, he’ll pull you to the side just before leaving for a mission
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
oh yes, he loves to experiment with you, he’ll be up to try anything once
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
3-4 rounds, he’ll take a few minutes between each round to check on you and get you a glass of water before continuing
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
yes! he has a couple of his own but he also keeps a couple to use on you
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
he prefers to tease you over you teasing him, anakin loves seeing you get all riled up
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
not too loud but not super quiet either, he mostly moans right next to your ear
W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)
loves fucking your face, whether it be with his dick or a dildo it doesn’t matter he loves it
X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)
i’m thinking he’s a good 7 inches and well groomed. he likes to keep it neat down there
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
so high. he’d keep going until he passed out if he could
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
i think he already has issues sleeping so it takes him a while to fall asleep afterwards
© kolsmikaelson : please do not copy, repost, or modify any of my content.
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opens-up-4-nobody · 2 years
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...
#today in things that stress me out. my academic interests have diverged significant from what i do in the lab#which is nice on one hand bc i am v passionately interested in something sciency again and it feels like its been a while since that#happened. but on the other hand it means that my workaholic tendencies are no longer being applied to my actual job#like im kind of just doing normal hours for like actual job stuff. which stresses me tf out bc i never feel like im doing enough#and my overdoing it has transfered over to drawing way too much in one sitting while listening to paleo podcasts and trying#to memorize the geologic time scale#so im still overextending bc im focused all the time and i dont sleep enough but its not applied to my job#and part of my brain cant handle that so it forces me to suffer no matter what. sigh. stupid exhausting brain#and i know im being irrational about it which somehow makes it worse#but idk i guess maybe its a little more healthy bc im trying to do something i like in my free time. even if im still overdoing it#like idk if i can express how exhausting it is to like something but ur brain forces u to think abt it all the time and feel guilty abt#thst being ur focus but u cant help it. and its like grinding chalk into the sidewalk. i just burn out on the things i like so fast#bc i cant regulate. im astounded that ive been on this narut0 kick for like 7months bc so often my obsession makes me so tired#but here i am. still staying strong dattebayo hahaha. nah it has been nice not to find anything new tho lol#sigh... idk i just got way way too close to like full on mental collapse with my photosynthesis measurements so im trying to get the#warmth back into my body before i have to jump back into that frozen water#i think i have at least another month before the machines get back and then ill have at least 3 or 4 projects to run samples for#was it wise of me to agree to doing all that? no absolutely not. but the data will be interesting#and itll be helpful. and literally no one else wants to do it so here i am. damaging myself for science. ay ay ay#whatever. im going off to do field work next week with my boss so maybe thatll get me out of my head#unrelated
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moonit3 · 5 months
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I see that request is open...
Sooo, i wonder what would happen if the reader/darling feels like something is wrong with Axel. Like, his personality felt almost fake. Like he did it as for the money,,,,
Bonus points if Axel actually about to ask the reader/darling to be his significant other! And reader/darling having moments of doubt which makes it harder for him to confess.
Like geee, i wonder why the reader/darling is like that- /sarcastic
another sequel for our boy axel! im glad that he receive some recognition as he is one of my favorite of the blog (о´∀`о) and today we have a continuation from the two previous segments.
A BREAK
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➥ warnings/notices: yandere male, obsession, insecurity from reader’s part, angst (?), axel being insensitive sometimes, reader cries but nothing too much, not much yandere stuff on this.
➥ yandere! rent-a-boyfriend x gn! reader
➥ synopsis: after dating this new guys for a while, he makes a proposal that you might not accept.
➥ a/n: soooooooo this is quite short compared to my other projects (sorry anon…) as i had some struggles on writing this for some reason such as a temporary writing block, an incoming test and my insomnia. but no worries, i promise this one is a good one despite not having much yandere stuff on it, so enjoy it!
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“do you want to make things official?”
“official?”
“yes, we should start dating real, without any contract between us.”
today was a little different than the usual dates with axel. instead of being you to call him to a date or send a text message to the enterprise that you wish to see him, he was the one who sent a voice mail to you, asking if you could meet him without needing to pay him.
at first, you believed that he just wanted to hang out with you as friends and maybe getting to know each other for real, but it seems he wants to take things further than you expected.
“you sure?” your finger began playing with each other, a way to calm yourself down and relax your mind with the words that came out of his lips. this wasn’t what you’ve planned for the day, but now you will have to endure axel for the afternoon. “i mean, i think things have been going well between the two of us like this…”
his eyes notice how nervous you’ve become and despite wanting to get close, to assure things will go well, axel just stay on his side of the bench. “you’re right, but don’t you think things will get better when we get together? like a real couple.” his hand moves to hold yours, but you move it away in the last second, making you getting further away from his touch. “what is wrong? you look more lost than usual, did something happened?”
you nodded. “i-it’s just that I’m scared of you leaving me.” the way your eyes seems to lose some sparkle when you speak makes axel’s heart drop. “i had a bad experience prior you and i don’t want this to happen again.”
right. you haven’t forgive that incident when you are dating the ‘first axel’ and it’s look that you won’t be forgotten about it anytime soon, specially as he had humiliated you in a intimate moment like that. but you don’t this ‘axel’ is the same one that broke your heart and he hopes to continue like this.
“yeah, there was that guy…” he fakes a smile, trying to keep his posture up and to not show any signs that he knows the subject more than you’ve told him before. “…he sounds like a horrible person from what you’ve said to me.”
“indeed. he was the worst.” he mentally agreed with you, back then, he had a terrible personality. “he was the worst human being, a horrible person and he deserves death.” oh. is that what you’ve thinking? killing him and trashing him? honestly, he can’t blame you.
as you continue to ramble about the fiasco of your first experience with the rent-a-boyfriend guy, axel caresses your hair. the thoughts inside his head are running wild, mostly of it are questioning himself if what he doing is right.
he is lying at you. pretending to be someone who he isn’t just to praise and protect you from his own actions that made you question if trusting someone is right or wrong, axel is responsible for making you crying numerous night. however, he doesn’t feel like to tell you the true.
when you ended your little speech of how terrible he was, a smile grows on your face when you look up to see his eyes. you look happier than usual now, compared to just a few minutes ago. are you going to say yes? take his words into consideration and be with him for real?
“can we stay like this? like, not a real couple for an extra time. im still not ready for a real relationship, axel.” you said, removing his hand away from your hair and hold it gently closer to your heart. “i do have feelings for you, but there are a lot of things that are making me feel trapped in the past, like i’m not ready to move on from it and you have been so distant in the recently days.”
so you did notice that. but how much do you truly know what he is hiding?
“i know that you have other clients other than me, but you are always looking at your phone when we are out together,” axel is making sure that you won’t receive another match from the app, resulting you on be his only. “and you don’t even reply to me when i ask something.” his voice keep failing as he didn’t got used to the lower tone.
he removes his hand away from yours, despite wanting to feel your touch on his skin. he needs to find an excuse, “i got busy with the enterprise asking me to help them at the financial sector.” is that a good one? “so they keep sending me multiple messages, but that is no excuse to my behavior in the recent dates we had.”
your lips curves into a smile when he said that, but it didn’t change the fact that you still suspicious of his behavior, you can feel something off. “i understand it, axel. but i think we should take a break.”
what?
“it will the best for us, axel.” you caressed his dark hair, smiling at his face. “i need to be by myself for a time, to get things back together and to prioritize my health as my work is getting harder in recently days. im sorry this might hurt you, but i really need to be alone—“
“it’s okay.” he smiled. “i know things have been hard to you and im going to be here to help you, at any distance.” his arms wrapped around your body, bringing you closer and leaving no other option than hugging him back.
your face rest on his chest, he can feel that you are crying against his shirt’s fabric, but axel doesn’t say nothing to ruin the moment. he knows that you have been working hard and even with you wanting space from him, axel will take care of you as he will keep his presence unknown to you in the future.
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@moonit3 writings
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weeb-polls-with-pip · 4 months
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Autistic Anime Boys Prelims - Propaganda Division - Group 2
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Propaganda:
Kyouya -
"what's there to say? you know him. you love him. vote kyoya."
Rinnosuke -
"Rinnosuke Morichika lives in an overly-cluttered curio shop, and has a special interest in making magical inventions. Since he doesn’t live in a modern setting— but a pocket dimension slightly disconnected to the outside world— whenever a modern item shows up in his shop via spiriting away, he can obsess over it for extended periods of time. He is quite blunt without realizing it, even to people he cares for. He also has a special ability to generally understand the name and use of any item he touches (though this backfires sometimes, he thought a Gameboy was a doomsday device once)."
Fuuta -
"okay look theres so many fucking signs hes autistic. he cannot tell tone and often doesn't know how to react to stuff which is a major point in his character id say. he was asked if he remembered his victim's name (hes a murderer. oops!) and his response was something along the lines of "Of course I do. I saw it everywhere." because he did not understand that they wanted to know what it was since it wasnt directly stated. im convinced that hoodies are a comfort object of his because i genuinely have not seen him without one except for one time. also hes canonically a chronically online twitter user. also he gets really passionate about his interests. also not really related but everyone in the fandom agrees hes transgender but no one can agree on what way. ive seen every single gender hc for this dude. vote kajiyama fuuta for this sopping wet poor little meow meow of a man."
Hansum -
"He's just a very odd and strange lad, can't remember names well, is an alien (mild spoiler), he's very popular, obsessed with Doritos and becomes their mascot, just refers to everyone as humans which is a mood, and is completely socially oblivious."
Miyuki -
"Relatable neurodivergent-Gifted Child syndromeTM case with all the superiority-inferiority complex that results. A chronic show-off and scheming strategist with a lowkey hopeless romantic dramatic aspect to him, silly cool and pathetic in a very hilarious way. Shirogane has a trademark glare purely thanks to his eyebags as he runs on coffee everyday having to support his family with multiple jobs in addition to class, on top of student council president duties. He's kind and an obsessive perfectionist who fills his entire wall with the weirdest motivational posters. Shirogane is very devoted to his love. He likes penguins (Kaguya and him is peak asd4asd and bi4bi btw)."
Kirito -
"He's autistic and bisexual as hell, and there's a good bit of trans coding in him 🥺
Autism coding: Bro's literally got a sword and swordfighting hyperfixation where, despite playing a game that focuses around guns, he still chooses to use a sword!! We also see him completely missing Asuna's flirting at first (he tells her she could have just checked her friendlist to make sure he was alive, in response to her tracking him down to see him)
Bi coding: Dual wielding swords is literally a euphemism in Japan for bisexuality; and Kirito initially tries to hide the fact he can dual wield out of fear of how the people he's close to will view him (and once he reveals it to them and they accept it, he begins to be more open about it.) Also in the Underworld arc he becomes very close with Eugeo to the point of living with him (and sharing a bed on occasion), and there are several parallels between Eugeo and Asuna, and they're so gay for each other that despite the anime having only a toned down version of it, they're still very affectionate (Also of note is that Eugeo is the only guy in SAO canon to consistently have a 'laying in bed with Kirito' talk CG in the spinoff games) (There's more but it's spoilers and this is a shortened version)
Trans coding: Kirito is very trans coded in the light novel (which shows Kirito's thoughts in much greater detail than the anime) Aincrad arc reveals that Kirito explicitly Does Not Like his real face, and dislikes how feminine it looks (he mentions that its led to him and his cousin being mistaken for sisters) And in Phantom Bullet arc, he's visibly uncomfortable at being mistaken for a girl due to his avatar's appearance, and in response to being misgendered he briefly panics and checks to make sure his chest flat (at least in the anime adaptation) 🏳️‍⚧️"
Shirou -
"Has one goal in life and ignores almost everything in favor of trying to fulfil that goal."
Keith -
"Speaks in a way that is seen as weird and has mannerisms others think is funny. He struggles with not being taken seriously by others because of this and many of the things others say goes over his head. He struggles to connect with other people because of these things. His entire arc in the second film is about him deciding that the people who don't accept him for who he is aren't worth it and that he's going to continue being himself."
Junpei -
"for other fans of this series, I know the more obvious representation here may be Luou, Junpei is So Good. his special interest is ballet and he has so many hangups involving how his family sees him and how other boys his age interpret him to the point that his idea of masculinity is extremely narrow and he enforces social rules on himself to mask and keep people from realizing that he loves something that Isn't Manly. he misinterprets social cues and takes things literally, like assuming that when Miyako asked him to dance with her she meant Right This Minute rather than as a pair in the studio. for some reason the point where he cuts his hair super short to prove his devotion to ballet is also sticking with me, I think maybe it's the combination of the way it's normal for boys/men in Japan to do that, yet Junpei didn't realize that kind of attitude/action didn't suit ballet at all? he wasn't aware that the context was completely different. Junpei also doesn't act or pretend very well, he's gotta put his whole entire ass into his roles, which he then proceeds to get TOO into and cause a lot of trouble, without giving too much away! he's really relatable to me as someone who's socially anxious but very skilled at masking, and seeing him become more comfortable with himself and start to show how he really feels is so inspiring to me."
Kazuma -
"He may be (wildly) misguided but his intentions are good kinda! He’s just the Guy of all time idk how to explain it."
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