#but i like seeing and knowing that people out there on the internet are enjoying what i put out

[serendipnpipity]

Favorite DnP Tour Song Statistics

Settle round, little ducklings, do I have some statistics to share with you all!!

A grand total of 156 people participated in this survey, so thank you if you took the time to fill it out! 🧡

As a teaser, here’s a pie chart of the votes for your favorite song! We’ll be discussing this in depth in its own section but I know some of you f*ck vibe with pie charts more than the bar charts I use there…

To give you a clear vision of what we’ll be looking at, here are the categories of the upcoming analysis:

Phandometrics (community growth on a viewership & fandom scale)

Favorite Song (general)

Favorite Song vs. Phandometrics (the main hypothesis!)

Honorable Mentions (fun little quirks I noticed along the way)

Ready? Time to read on.

PHANDOMETRICS

Lag between year started watching -> year joined the phandom. This can be seen most obviously in the 2009-2015 portion of the graph, likely when the community was just building up. I went back to check individual points, and many people seem to join a year or two after starting to watch.

Three distinct peaks of phandom growth: 2015 (dnp popularity peak), 2019 (coming out), and 2023 (dnpg comeback, dnp renaissance). Pretty expected, but still cool to see!

The difference between the peaks when you look at viewership vs. phandom is interesting though! Especially 2019 seems to be a huge spike in viewership, but the phandom growth seems a little more gradual (maybe more people lurked at first, then joined the phandom in 2023 once they were more active?).

The 2012 peak is really interesting. Most popular year to start watching from this sample, apparently!

FAVORITE SONG

"The Internet is Here" won 51.3% of the votes... which didn't surprise me all that much. It's iconic, okay?

II is about half as popular, and beyond the song qualities themselves, I wonder if a contributing factor to this pattern could be its lack of availability as an officially released song.

I think Everything's Fine is so low partially bc I closed the poll before WAD released to prevent the recency effect from skewing the data. (Especially because I thought we were getting "Everything's Fine (Acoustic)" smh.)

FAVORITE SONG VS. PHANDOMETRICS

By era...

I had a hypothesis: based on the year you joined, which I now realize in my head wrongly equated with the year you were most active in, you'd be more biased towards the song of that era bc a) you were more likely to go to the tour or b) epic nostalgia hit.

Yeah, I was wrong.

When you group the eras you see that TIIH wins in almost every single group by a similar proportion to the total, which means this attitude is fairly evenly distributed amongst the phannies.

By year...

Separating by year, you begin to see that, hold up, the hypothesis could have some merit! In either 2017 or 2018 on both graphs, the II finale actually does win.

The super high TIIH votes bleeding in from 2015/2016 and from 2019 seemed to mask this pattern.

HONORABLE MENTIONS

I have no idea what happened here but both ways you slice it, Interactive Introverts was fighting for its life amongst the 2012 phannies???

We got three phannies that have been watching since 2009!! The fact that people have been sticking around so long (up to fifteen years!!! and this was only a sample of 156 of us!!!) is really heartwarming for me bc it's a testament to how strong of a community dnp have built their viewership to be.

At the end of the day, what can I say? That was a lot of statistics. I hope you enjoyed or took something away from this little survey. Lmk if you notice any other cool trends or have any theories on what the data means!

Thank you for listening to my yapping; have an orange heart.

🧡

#OH ALSO GUYS I literally did all of the categorizing manually in order to make the clustered bar graphs. it was a pain. it was worth it. #dan and phil #dnp #we're all doomed #wad #phan #tatinof #interactive introverts #daniel howell #danisnotonfire #amazingphil #phil lester #ser does stats #ser shares #stats phannies; music phannies; data analyst phannies... this one is for you <3

[99tech99]

i only found tumblr about a year ago

i was absolutely devastated in the wake of plan 99. tech was my favorite. tech still is my favorite. i was dejected for longer than i probably should have been. i was googling fan theories about what happened to tech and seeing if people thought he was really dead

in my searching, found a piece of bad batch fan art. i scrolled through the page, until i got a popup that told me to log into tumblr for more. and here i am.

and i found this AMAZING fandom. so MANY fandoms! tumblr is our little corner of the internet. i really wish i had some talent to share, but i am mostly a consumer here, appreciating the unbridled talent of all you artists

i love so much that i have found "my people" here. those of you who are like me, silly and dorky and obsessive and wild and passionate about the clones (or star wars in general, or harry potter, or marvel, or anime or games or anything!)

thank you to anyone and everyone who has been brave enough to put themselves out here for us to enjoy your work!

as we approach the end of the line, just a few shout outs to bloggers who particularly stand out to me when im thinking of the bad batch fandom.

@shyranno it was your art that led me to tumblr!

@zoeykallus you wrote one of the first spicy clone head cannons i ever came across (pretty sure it was where tbb likes to finish haha) but all your fan fics are amazing!

@ventresses your memes make me scream laugh every time. i dont know how you do it

@alligatorpie1945 i love your tbb au drawings, esp the one where they are on a roadtrip and the car has broken down

@ladykagewaki your art is so heartwarming. i adore your artistic style. ms fangirl is so relatable and the baby batch is too adorable to be allowed.

@isthereanechoinhere96 thanks for not getting annoyed when i tag you in posts you have already reblogged 🤣 i love your lego comics! soo cute!

i know im forgetting people but i love you all! just because our show is ending doesnt mean this fandom will! ❤️

two more hours....

#star wars #the bad batch #tbb #star wars fan art #star wars fan fiction #star wars fandom #the bad batch fanart #the bad batch fanfiction #the cavalry has arrived #im not crying youre crying

[smartycvnt]

Title: Idiot

Pairing: Dom Mysterio x Reader

Prompt: N/A

Word Count: 1236

Dom knew that it was only a matter of time. You had been incredibly up front with him about your past with Finn whenever he joined Judgement Day. A few other wrestlers knew about your past relationship with the Irishman, but for the most part, Creative had no idea. At least they hadn't until Becky's book was released and the internet seemed to go wild over the news.

You had been put in romantic storylines before, ones that Dom hadn't cared so much about. Guys like Grayson and Austin weren't really your type. If anything, Dom had been more upset whenever people pointed out the way you had looked at Tegan more than whenever you were pretending to pine after Waller at NXT.

Watching you hang off of Finn's arm for the backstage segment made Dom's blood boil. For the past few weeks, Dom hadn't been able to get the image of you doing the things for Finn that you did for Dom. It didn't help that you seemed to genuinely work Finn up whenever you had your hands all over him.

"Come back with those title belts, and I'll see what I can do for you baby," you told Finn. You dragged your hand along his chest slowly, fingers pressing in just a little. Finn bit his lip as he looked at you, nodding subtly before he walked off screen. The cameras cut and almost immediately, you hopped over to Dom and Rhea.

"I don't think that was very PG," Rhea teased. You rolled your eyes as you tried to move into Dom's arms before he had to go out. Dom usually opened right up so you could stand with him, but tonight, he seemed a bit closed off.

"Hunter wants it to feel natural, that's all," you told her. Rhea knew that you'd never do something to hurt Dom, not knowingly. This was just work, and Dom had promised that he understood it before you agreed to the angle.

"Well, just don't overdo it. You know how rumors tend to fly," Rhea warned you. Dom walked away, moving to walk out. You frowned at the way that he hadn't even acknowledged you. Dom wasn't like that, he never had been with you.

You hoped that it was just his nerves, but even after the match, Dom wasn't acting like himself. You weren't sure what to do as you went out for your own match. He was usually there to give you a good luck kiss, but Dom was nowhere to be seen. However, when you turned around, Finn was there with a camera crew behind him.

"I know that I didn't come back with the title, but that doesn't mean you can't. Kiss for luck?" Finn looked a little reluctant to be standing there. You swallowed back all of the negative feelings that this gave you to press a kiss to Finn's cheek. He sent you an apologetic look as you walked through the curtains.

It should have been the best match of your career, but instead, all you could think about was how Dom hadn't been there for you. You went out to win your first title, and Dom hadn't come out to see you. The excitement of it was drowned out by feeling like you were completely alone. Tears were flowing down your cheeks, but they weren't happy ones for all of your hard work paying off.

Every single congratulatory message from your friends and coworkers backstage only made you cry even harder. All you wanted was for Dom to wrap you up in his arms and tell you he was proud of you or that he loved you. Instead, you had nearly everybody else on the roster telling you how good you were, but you couldn't enjoy it. You couldn't bask in the glory of nearly a decade of hard work.

"Uh oh, those aren't happy tears." You turned around at the sound of Tyson Kidd's voice behind you. He had always been like your big brother, watching your back whenever you didn't think anybody was paying attention to you. "You just won the big one, what's wrong?"

"Dom, he isn't here. He's the only person I want to see right now, and he's not here. Where is he? What did I do? It's like he hates me," you cried. Tyson pulled you into a tight hug, holding you as you let out sob after sob. It would have been a sweet moment, something the social medias would have wanted if only you weren't so upset.

You were so caught up in crying and ranting to Tyson that you missed Dom walk up with Rhea and Damian at his sides. He looked like a kicked puppy as he stood behind you, waiting for you to finish. Tyson gently pried you away from him and directed you towards Dom, who looked extremely guilty. Damian and Rhea looked livid as they both glared daggers at the young man standing in between them.

"Ash, baby, I'm sorry," Dom apologized. He took a step towards you and knelt down in front of you. You glanced down, unsure of what to say or do. "I've been an asshole all night, and I don't deserve to celebrate with you, but I am begging you to please not shut me out. I should have kissed you before you went out. I should have been the first person to congratulate you because you've done all of those things for me. I was being a stupid asshole, and I am sorry."

"Why Dom? What's been going on with you because it hasn't just been tonight that you've acted like that?" you asked him. Dom sighed as he stood up again. He didn't want to admit his feelings, they made him feel ridiculous. Dom trusted you not to do something like cheat on him, but he was terrified that you'd realize you still loved Finn.

"I realized that I did not like the way that you looked at Finn. It was like you loved him still. Every time that I closed my eyes at night, I saw you running back to him because he's better than me. He never would have treated you how I was, and honestly, you deserve better than me. You really do," Dom told you. You knew that Dom could be difficult at times, but you felt like you had loved him since you were at the PC together.

"You're right, I deserve better than how you've been treating me. That is exactly why you're going to treat me better than that Dom. You'll treat me how I deserve. You'll be there for me when I need you because I can't be made to feel like this every single time that you get jealous," you told him. Dom nodded as he stood up.

"Can I please have a kiss?" Dom asked you. You practically launched yourself into his arms. He pressed several kisses to your jaw as he held you. You broke into a new fit of tears, this time happier than the ones you had just shed. Dom wiped them away, muttering how proud he was of you as he did so. It sort of made it worse, but Dom still happily kissed away each of your tears as they fell before his lips settled against yours. "I am so proud of you. My precious champion."

#wwe x reader #my writing #one shot #wwe #dom mysterio x reader #dom mysterio #the judgement day x reader #the judgement day

[cathalbravecog]

i'm the antonymph of the internet

#how many tributes to this song will i make in my life #MANY ! it literally changed my life and means a lot to me. i love antonymph and vylet pony's music is worth checking out - please do. #unsupervised internet access as a queer neurodivergent kid anthem !! #i chose to do misty since we all know i like drawing her in experimental pieces and putting her in outfits. she also has art in a gir hoodi #from the clash team in treasure trove!! :D #this is also experimental/stylistic as well!! had fun!! nice to just draw something in one day and not worry. leaves me tired but... #haven't done a nice piece like so in one day in a while!!! i'm very proud :] it's a fun one #anyways... both a little tribute to the song and misty as a character #ihave so many thoughts about misty even if i dont talk publicly on them. shes a very interesting character to me and i care about her so #much. i compared her to fluttershy in the past - and realized that if i liked ttcc as a kid she would've been my favorite. #fluttershy on her own meant a lot to me as a child. including mlp itself as it's one of the core things that got me into drawing art online #a lot of my analysis on misty and headcanons at least on the more emotional scale do come from a bit of projecting but...it makes it more #fun to me when i can put myself into the shoes of a character like her who i already relate to. rrghh too bad im scared to talk about her #too much in nuanced detail in public since some people are... not so nice about her. though i know the tumblr audience is nice and unders #standing!! #anyways from me just having fun being me #i let misty have a little bit of fun... something i think she would possibly enjoy? i do see her as someone who gets nostalgic #and is stuck in more childish things and matters. she wants to play ip dip with you...its very sweet to me. letting myself and her be #confident through a song that means so much to me is kind of powerful to me. i had a lot of fun making this drawing. #anyways. love this song. love ttcc. love mity /p. be swag and be self indulgent and have fun. you can do anything u want forevah #toontown #toontown corporate clash #antonymph #guz art #rainmaker

[llitchilitchi]

western, native english speaking internet needs to be more normal about broken english. like genuinely. there are tons of posts talking about how english is such a hard language and how non-native speakers "shouldn't apologise for not speaking english fluently because they are making an effort"

and then when we turn around there are posts and youtube videos making fun of broken english. "this story is so hard to read ugh this is such poor prose I don't know what the author meant half the time" well maybe the author doesn't speak english so well. maybe the author never had to write long prose in english before. maybe the author wanted to share something they love with a wider community and the easiest way to go about it is writing in english because that is the most commonly spoken language in fandoms. maybe the author is trying their best and you are mocking them for it not being Good Enough for your standards as someone raised with the language the author started learning two years ago

it's not even in writing, really. it's the mocking of accents or the incorrect tenses and strange grammar, the strangely worded set of instructions posted online

everyone always talks inclusion and how this should be fine but the moment they actually see someone not do well and don't have it spelled out to them that the author isn't a native speaker? the internet turns to ridicule. and that needs to stop

#litchi.txt #idk what to tag this #Ive been watching far too many video essays #and I really enjoy the ones about internet history #like creepypasta and old games and flash etc #and the people in there loooove to point out broken english #maybe its not poor quality of the Content being covered maybe its someone struggling writing in a foreing fucking language #like I struggled. a lot. I still dont know a lot of stuff #the only reason Im semi eloquent half the time is cause Im chronically online since the tender age of 12 #and Im tired of seeing people who had the language level that I had back when I first started learning Be Mocked #its not a sign of quality maybe youre just a dick basically

[xhanisai]

I do kind of feel a bit spoilt with how the fandom pre-pandemic would share my work easily (fics getting hundreds and even thousands of notes on tumblr and on AO3 immediately and arts getting thousands of notes too). Back then, my work was so eUGH compared to the work I create now which is so much more polished and well thought out.

And now? It’s such a struggle for my art to reach even a hundred notes on this app alone and my fics take a long time to accumulate some attention on ao3. At first I thought it was because my creations have gotten WORSE lol but then I realised it’s been happening to all my friends too online.

Kinda sad tbh.

#delete later #i know that X amount of likes or notes on work doesn't necessarily mean that it's great quality #but i like seeing and knowing that people out there on the internet are enjoying what i put out #and i want more people to see what i can do if that makes sense? #my mentality is a little fucked right now because in the past i created mainly for me and i enjoyed what i did to an extent #but now i'm at that stupid stage where i hate everything i draw and get bored of my own writing and i don't like that #so validation online sort of helps with that mentality to go away #i can't keep up with internet art trends to get the attention on my work that i want that is not a realistic and healthy way of life #and i refuse to touch any salt or negativity in the ml fandom just to get the hivemind to find my work #my most popular work on ao3 is only popular because of lila karma and that makes me so mad because i write 100000x better than that LMAO #but people just wanna see a 14 yr old italian nightmare girl get expelled from school over and over again and i'm just tired af of it #as for art with twitter it's a bit of a russian roulette #you don't know what will be a banger and what won't unless you pay special attention or have a decent following or are always grinding #i don't think my art is for tumblr #i do appreciate the few people who always love and reblog it but i've always known from the start that my art isn't what would be popular #on this hellsite #oh well it is what it is #also don't worry i'm never gonna stop drawing nor am i ever gonna stop writing those two are literally my only outlets of my life #and the only way i can get emotions and feelings out of my body without exploding #and i am still madly in love with ML and will always be obsessed with it #i just miss how the prepandemic fandom would interact with my work and let me know what they thought and all the asks they sent about the #aus i created #it was a good period on this hellsite for me

[ruerock]

🧸 ?

#as much as i enjoy fandom spaces #the negativity in them sometimes can just. get me so shocked #ill be just casually enjoying a series with my friends and stuff #and then ill go see hows the fandom and oh boy #the fandom #i just usually surround myself with gay friends and in everyday life the topic doesnt really come up for me #since i admittedly do not talk much to strangers #or people im not 100% sure if i can trust #but internet is something else so when im encountering homophobia in the fandom like im just #i dont know i guess i kind of forget internet isnt build just out of gay people #or at least supportive people #and the whiplash i get... #anyway this has been my rant #i should be back to posting art soon im working on comms a lot to help my friend with vet bills still!! #i have a lot of personal stuff i wanna draw this year i hope i can do it all #january literally almost done and i like #blinked

[angeltism]

thinking abt how i'd be perceived by theoretical fans if i were to become a vtuber is like a much more serious version of those "if uu were a fandom character" polls and weirdly intimidating

#➳ the fool speaks #i don't think i'd have much of a 'character' i act as #no more than on here at least #n i'd say moi on here is p similar to like . . . i dunno . nawt moi irl because irl i'm quiet and reserved #but moi in my thoughts #which is what would be coming out on stream i think #but like . . . how WOULD i be perceived #the only thing i'm certain of is ppl pulling a certain rule of the internet #bc i cannawt search any vaguely fem presenting vtuber on here without 3943848 skimpy outfit fanarts and i know for a fact #there's at least like 4x of that that i'm simply nawt seeing . thankfully #wanted to look at art of another vtuber i like (nawt just cuz my qpp likened her to moi whaaat no that's . whaaaaat) #and my god was that a mistake to do in school hgfjfhgfhg #well . that's why i'm waiting a few years . part of the reason at least #i don't trust interweb peoples to be normal abt vtubers in any capacity . . . so #but ok other than People Online Are A Certain Way About Everything #i wonder like . . . how i'd be portrayed in fan work and spoken about #it's kinda fun to think about but i think that's me #enjoying the idea of being well known n famous or somethin . . #but i dunnoo it's still fun to think abt .

[feliciteacup]

i just realized i havent posted here in weeks oops

i have a youtube and a tiktok where i post mostly everything but i keep forgetting to post it to here too 😭 so if you like my stuff maybe you should follow me there instead of here

honestly i dont know if theres even like a community or interest for voice acting on tumblr or anything but im still here just less active here than other places!

[lots of rambling in the tags...]

#idk #i just have fun with it even if i can barely find an audience #maybe its the fact that im so late to it? #i watched mlp from like 2013-2015 then fell out of it and only got back into it last year #and only started ''voice acting'' since february #and all the mlp voice acting videos i see on youtube are from like 2016-2020 when i was not in the fandom #so maybe i just missed the height of popularity or whatever #but people in the mlp discord servers im in seem to enjoy it so i like that #i would like to join servers specifically for mlp voice acting communities since i want to make friends who do this kinda stuff too #but idk if those even exist? #is this like a niche interest and hobby now idk #i just like doing it because it brings me joy #and ive been happier than i ever was before these past few months ive been doing this #and ive become more confident #not cringing at listening to my own voice anymore #not as scared to post my voice to the internet #ive found something i enjoy doing and even if other people dont care thats fine because i care and i have fun doing it #and i know no ones reading this and im just writing this for myself but its good for me to write all of this out somewhere

[caffeinatedopossum]

I've always really wanted to make music (almost all of the 250 notes on my phone are lyrics I've been compiling for months and there were hundreds more on my other phones that are lost forever now) but I've been so scared and idk why. I should just do it because I think I'll regret not doing it but there's so many things I'm scared of.

I feel overwhelmed when people talk about making music and it sounds so hard and like their process is so intense and requires so much knowledge and equipment and and *insert x thing they need here* and I'm over here, recording a bit of audio on my phone and trying my best with pre-made instrument loopers on a free app. Idk, it's like somehow people convinced it can't be easy or I'm doing it wrong and I honestly still don't know if they were right or not

#im also so scared about people not liking my music #but also scared of people liking it too #its like i dont want people i know to hear it i think because their opinions matter too much to me maybe #im scared people i know will like it and actually really listen and realize im talking about myself and see me differently or smthn #its not that theyll see me differently... its that theyll see me at all #thats a terrifying thought #but sometimes i also wonder if some stranger on the internet will listen to a song- maybe just once or twice #but for a small moment theyll be there with me in a way #getting lost in what the song feels like and appreciating it #maybe it will be the shitty song someone shows their friends when they pass the aux #maybe as an artist I'll be some small treasure to a few people. something that they feel they can keep forever even tho it isnt me #idk i like those thoughts i think. i dont want to be famous or anything i just kind of want it to be recorded #i want to be able to be seen even i dont ever decide i want that #i want to make something that i love now and in 5 years listen back on and go 'wow this sucked ass lmao. good for him' #i want to know something and i dont know what it is but i feel like if i keep digging and writing and exposing myself #and thinking and trying and making things... maybe I'll be able to give form to some new concept #maybe ill put it into words- what i really want to say but dont know how to. maybe ill make something out of these abstractions and chaos #and most of all... maybe I'll actually enjoy it too

[buckleyseddie]

...

#i need to drown my phone in a lake #and maybe also ****** #i'm too attached to this stupid hellsite even if lately it isn't really fun #i see too many posts that feel like a punch in the gut #and apart from a handful of people (who i appreciate a lot don't get me wrong) i don't really. interact with anyone? #so i shouldn't want to come back but. i still do #like i've barely posted anything this week but not because i'm not here it's because i just don't feel like it #like. i see posts that i like but they're piling up in my likes and i don't feel like rbing them #i just don't feel like doing anything #so yeah i should delete the app but. let's face it i probably won't #but i should #and drowning my phone would be very helpful cause it would leave me no choice but to stay off tumblr #which would reduce my daily crying by at least 10% #also not having many people to interact with here is definitely my fault like i know people are nice and i can reach out and make friends #but also i. don't think more internet friendships are what i need right now #again. i love and appreciate the ones i have and i wouldn't change them for the world but. yeah #anyway this is pointless cause i'm still gonna be here tomorrow #maybe soon i will be able to actually enjoy it and engage again #monse talks

[luxwing]

are we allowed to have fun even if the game is buggy or is that enabling the pokemon company?

Why are you asking me bud? If you like the game play it and enjoy it if you don't then don't like there's no ethical consumption under capitalism the way everything is take the scraps of joy you can get

If we spend hours on end being hyper vigilant about everything we consume all that does is make us miserable nihilistic husks bruh chase your fucking bliss but also stay informed you know what I mean?

#for the love of everything im not the go-to source for morality checks im just a guy on the internet #all i know is that if i sat there and deep-dived every single thing I liked to see all the messed up shit about it #and held myself to standards that said i couldn't enjoy anything that wasn't squeaky clean #then id be a miserable bastard with even more mental illness than i already got #like all you can do is stay informed and raise the voices of people who speak out against their abuse but outside that #youre just a person and you deserve to find joy in shit yanno? but idk im just a dude

[forgottenliv]

.

#i want this thing off the internet so i can start fresh #it just feels. unfinished #like in a way that a few edits cant fix #it's keeping me up at night and giving me anxiety attacks #people say 'write badly' and thats cool and all but i Know i can do better #i have all of it saved #comments too #it's hard bc i know some people have enjoyed it #and i appreciate every single one of them #truly #but this is not an impulse decision #i've been wrestling with this for a while now #i set out to make the kind of content i'd want to see #but this isn't quite it #it will be back #i'm not abandoning it #on the contrary #i'm going to make it better than ever

[dmclemblems]

man, imagine just... letting people have their own opinions of gw and not making fun of people who did or didn’t enjoy it.

people in this fandom are so aggressive.

you can talk about your opinions and even hate or love as strongly as the human heart allows! just... don’t say things like “people are stupid for thinking xyz”. you do realize you may have mutuals or even friends following you that see that and are now apprehensive to talk to you, especially about this game, right? that you might be offending your own friends and acquaintances with insulting terminology and you don’t know a friend feels that way because they’re too anxious to even tell you now because you’ve made it clear that you think everyone with xyz opinion is some insulting and hurting term?

it’s one thing to say things like “this is the best/worst route between both games and I love/hate it more than anything”. it’s another to say something like “everyone who loves/hates gw is an absolute retard who didn’t understand claude’s character in houses in the first place if they loved/hated gw”.

no, I’m not quoting anyone specifically, but I’m trying to iterate to you an example of the sorts of things I’m seeing people saying as if under the assumption that every single person in their space agrees with them and that they’re not risking hurting someone with their words.

yeah, you can hate the route or love the route with every fiber of your being. I’m just personally not sure that’s worth being hateful toward every single other human being who has the opposite opinion as you, or worth making people apprehensive about checking their social media every day because they follow people who are very likely to insult entire groups of people based on their likes/dislike in a fictional universe.

like, yeah, I didn’t enjoy the second half of gw... but you know what’s cool? I’m still close friends with someone who liked it and feels the opposite way that I do about the writing and about claude.

#it sucks too bc I have mutuals on Twitter who will NOT stop talking about it #and going out of their way to point out every instance of their opinion while like #degrading the people who don't agree #at that point like mind your own business and talk about things that are fun??? stop getting mad at people for their opinions??? #it's really easy to go find something you enjoy on the damn internet it's like the easiest way ever lol #even when I just check regular tags for characters nowadays it's the same arguments #half or more of the content isn't the characters or fanart or anything like that anymore #it's just people arguing about stupid shit like okay we get it you do or don't like the writing in it #it doesn't mean you have to go out of your way to make other people feel bad about their opinion #it's one thing to discuss with people in your space (depending on which social media you use etc) #but to go out of your way or to outright insult people with the opposite opinion just makes you look like you're trying to start fights #when this game came out I wanted to remember it by being Billy's final work for his job and he did so so so good #and now it's hard to look at this game and think of it that way because I keep thinking of all the drama #it's still hard to listen to Ferdinand's lines and some more than others bc I was in Billy's streams a lot #so when I hear those things I tend to picture his face and it's still difficult for me. I still can't wrap my head around him being gone #and for two months at that now. I want to look at this game and think of the work he did and you know? if you don't that's fine #but it's hard for me to see it that way now when I just can't log on to ANYTHING on ANY day and see ANYTHING but arguing or like #people straight up insulting others and using offensive terms about people who didn't like something #like cool you loved/hated gw. wanna explain why you're tagging your hate for other people to see? would love to hear THAT explanation #it's kinda like how on Twitter I've had to block an obscene amount of people in the dmcl tags #bc they post the ship name i.e. a keyword in searches that will come up when fans look for content #and it's a bunch of offensive shit about the entire fanbase and how we're all disgusting people with shit opinions #and who don't enjoy the ship for actual context but apparently bc we just want to see two guys bang #imagine lumping an entire fandom of anything (ship character series etc) into an insulting and offensive box just bc YOU don't like it #or you had ONE bad experience with a fan of it so now you post hate in their search keywords instead of censoring it #so that it doesn't come up in someone's searches #literally how are you going to be prejudice about an entire group of shippers or character fans full of ppl you don't even KNOW? #and instead of talking to some of them to understand their reasoning you just post offensive shit in their searches/tags #this is the kind of shit I'm seeing with Hopes too which is why I'm mentioning it here

[iridescentis]

losing my mind a little

#sometimes hearing other people's opinions of your fav stuff is wonderful #sometimes you want to bash your head into a wall and cry #i wish i wasn't so easily influenced by other people's opinions y'know? #like my brain just sees it and immediately says whatever i think is wrong #its so fucking annoying #im one of those people that just obsesses over one simple thing #im not a 'learn everything i possibly can about it' person #when im fixated on smth that doesn't mean i want to know everything about it #but i end up feeling like shit because most fandom people i have seen are like that #i just enjoy things that fuel my overactive imagination! #anything that provides daydreams is my favourite! #but i just can't commit to something as much #it's so weird bc irl i feel like im the one who's too much #but in fandom spaces i feel like im not enough #i don't have particularly strong opinions about anything #i feel like im too apathetic for fandoms but too invested for it to be considered a casual interest #where are my people who love writing fics and making aus but don't give a shit about canon accuracy and extended lore?? #i think i just need to stop looking at the latest posts in tags #ive been on a mission to filter myself less and yet im always catching myself #double checking what everyone else thinks so i don't say anything different #i hate my dumbass brain lmao #it's like im a fish out of water everywhere #so many people ive heard suck ass at real life #but flourish on the internet #because they're surrounded with others like them #but no matter where i go i still feel wrong? #when i was younger i cared way less about appearing normal #i was fucking weird and proud of it #maybe a little too proud #but idk what the fuck happened

[aromantic-pantyanarchy]

It's me. I'm the cis, heterosexual, aromantic man. I will never marry, I will never be married, I will grow into middle age and elder age and I will die unmarried. I will be forced to support a household of myself on only my wages alone for the rest of my life. I will be asked about women and marriage and children by my family for the rest of my life (or men, the progressive ones might say). I may not ever come out to them. I feel like I burned my coming out on something stupid. I don't want to explain it. I don't want to run them through the definitions and intricacies. I don't want the acceptance without understanding, placating me with ceased questions and poor explanations to other, drunk adults.

I like my hair to be long, I spent a year with it dyed a golden blonde with dark roots because I like the trashy party girl aesthetic. I want to dye it again with pink tips. I like painting my nails, black and blue are my favorite colors. I like wearing chokers. I also like wearing baggy jeans and ratty hoodies. I like having stubble. I like having chest hair. I like having a square jaw and broad shoulders. I wish I had a flatter stomach and a thinner profile frame. I don't know what this makes me, perhaps this is something no more GNC than Machine Gun Kelly. I think about this a lot, how queer my appearance truly is. I should think about it less. I have thought long and hard about if I could be trans or if I could be non-binary or if I could be genderqueer and the conclusion I ultimately came to is that I most enjoy being a man open to whatever self-expression I want.

I don't date, but I've thought about it. I would like to meet people, and I would like to have sex with them. But I don't want to hurt them. I fear if I explain what I am beforehand it'll scare them away. I fear if I explain after they'll feel manipulated or abused. I don't know how many people in the dating scene want what I want. I fear my own lack of experience will make me a bad lay, an embarrassing story to tell to confidants in hindsight. I fear my own virginity, a boundary to those I wish to be like. All of these fears are baseless, as I've not been able to even begin a single relationship in my life. Despite this I still heavily identify with terms like "slut" and "manwhore" and "thot" because my interests lay so deeply within casual sex, sex without great intimacy or emotion. This may be some form of stolen valor. I hope the true sluts are not too mad at me.

I made this blog several years ago because a mutual of mine reblogged memes making fun of aro and ace people, making fun of the concept of aphobia, and in addition well known aphobes. I didn't feel comfortable talking about aro stuff on my main blog, for as little as I talk about it. Living through the ace discourse of the 2016 era has largely caused me to cringe in embarrassment any time I am forced to discuss my orientation with people who aren't aro or ace themselves. I no longer follow this person. I unfollowed many people I was mutuals with from that time, most of them because they posted too often about how much they hated men and I didn't want to see that, some because our interests simply drifted too far apart, only one for explicit aphobia reasons. (Also one because they became a "both sides are bad, any vote is wasted" libertarian, but that's unrelated.)

I guess at this point I don't care deeply about what strangers on the internet think of me. If a trusted friend told me that they don't think I'm truly queer that may hurt. But I am going to continue to use the word for myself. I take up no resources. I go to events that are open to me. If an event was not open to me, I think I'd not want to go anyways. I am not a hypothetical, I am not a strawman, I am a person with lived experiences both within and exterior to the queer community. If you hate me, I will permit you to continue to do so. But ultimately, I am who I am, I cannot change these facts, and I would not choose to do so even if I could.

#aromantic #aro #aro positivity #reference to aphobia