#but I’m just having fun with this oc even with some of the angst he’ll go through | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

liliansun · 1 year

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FTWS: FIRST ANNIVERSARY | L. DONGHYUCK

synopsis: You and Haechan have been fighting lately and even though they were small arguments, it all got thrown into the same melting pot. To add onto the stress, your ex boyfriend shows up unannounced and his arrival causes things to stir up even worse than what they were before. (Note: this is a pt 2, check out pt1 here)

pairing: boyfriend!haechan x oc ft. mystery ex bc 🤭

wc: 7.7k

genre: fluff, comedy, slice of life au, angst, all that jazz

warnings: swearing, kissing, mentions of blood (just a small part where a wound is open but not anything graphic), lmk if I miss anything!

mentions of: 127, dream and wayv members, mention of aespa members

<3: did I write this all in one day—yea, do I regret it, no baby LMAO. also a special thanks to mako for getting me through these last few hours along w ash and briar for also just being some of the most amazing friends I could ask for. also thank YOU for giving all the love to fre trial wedding style and giving it 1k notes in just a little over a week, I hope this is just as good as the first and I love you all <33

Ever since you and Haechan started dating, it’s been interesting to say the least. He takes you on random dates throughout the city and almost always pays for each, you try to reason with him that you do have your own money to chip in, but he tells you chivalry isn’t dead and pays before you can get another word in. You know it’s sweet and he’s trying to be romantic, but somehow it also leads to small arguments. For example, the argument you’re both in as you pace the living room of your apartment happens to be based off the date you decided to cut short due to his lack of view from your standpoint.

“I don’t understand why you’re so mad, I’m your boyfriend and I want to be able to do things for you.” Frustrated, Haechan watches as you walk around your living room, running his hands through his hair.

“That’s because you don’t let me do anything, you don’t let me pay, you don’t let me have much say into where we go or what we do and you treat me like a baby when in fact I’m older than you.” After listening to the reasons off on your hand, you stand with your hands on your hip. He rolls his eyes, moving his entire body in the motion. “By a couple months—why are we even bringing age up, this isn’t about who is what, this is about—I don’t even know what this is about anymore.” You let out a heavy sigh, rubbing your temples to relax the migraine that was pounding against your skull.

Haechan moves across the room, grabbing both of your hands and bringing them to his lips. The soft kisses he places along your knuckles brings you back in as you meet his eyes. “Look, I’m sorry for making you upset.” You can tell how genuine his words are by the look he’s giving you. “I won’t plan everything without your input anymore, I promise.” He continues kissing your hand, moving his kisses down to your wrist. The feeling of his soft lips on your skin let's open the cage to the butterflies that flutter inside your chest. “I forgive you hyuck.” He smiles against your skin, moving his lips from your wrist to your lips.

You wrap your arms around his neck, grazing your fingers through the ends of his hair. As he pulls back from the short and sweet kiss, he rests his forehead against yours, taking in the moment while it lasts. “Are you staying over tonight?” You frown, shaking your head which is returned with a mirrored frown. “I got a meeting in the morning with Jungwoo and you know that he’ll chew my ass if I’m late by a second.”

“Why can’t you stay over then, I’ll get up and make you breakfast and even lay your clothes out for you.” Haechan moves his head into the crook of your neck, checking every box of his tactics to convince you to stay. You relish in the feeling of his worth, letting out what felt like the millionth sigh of the night. “That sounds like fun hyuckie, but last time you tried to make breakfast, you nearly burnt down your apartment.” He laughs against your shoulder, making you laugh in return by the tickling feeling of him giggling against your skin. “So does that mean I can stay over instead?” You pull back, eyeing Haechan as he gives you the same goofy smile he always has on. “Go home before I take my key back.”

Haechan continues laughing, pulling his keys from his front pocket. As he holds them up, you see the purple key with home written across the metal. “As if I’d ever let you take this back, this is my key to your heart baby and unfortunately for you, you’re stuck with me.” Rolling your eyes, you turn him around and start to push him towards the door. “Yeah yeah, better be glad I still like your crazy ass.” Haechan opens your front door, turning around to face you as you wait for him to initiate the goodnight kiss. As cheesy as it sounds, it’s almost become a tradition for you two to kiss before the other returns back to their apartment. Even though you’re right across from each other, to you it seals in everything that the day has brought and leads to a better night.

Haechan leans down, kissing you so gently that you can barely feel that he’s there and those are your favorite type of kisses with him. All of them are probably your favorite, but this one in particular tops the cake. As he pulls away, you almost don’t wanna see him go, but you need all the rest you can get before work in the morning. “Goodnight y/n.” Haechan’s voice sounds so bittersweet, walking backward to his door as you give him a small wave. “Goodnight hyuck.” He smiles at the nickname, turning to open his door and disappearing behind it once it’s shut.

Closing your door, you make your way down the hall and climb into bed to settle for the night. Just as you start to get comfortable, you hear your phone go off with notifications. Deciding not to ruin your comfort, you neglect your unread notifications and opt for sleep. By the morning, you still don’t have the energy to check your phone and instead skip breakfast and head straight to the office to get the day over with. The moment you step into the building, you’re greeted with Jaehyun who was standing by the front desk chatting it up with Winter. You notice two coffees in his hand and to much surprise, one of them is your usual order.

When Jaehyun notices you, he makes his way over and hands you your cup. “You’re in a surprisingly good mood today.” You scowl at him as you take a sip of your drink. “Says the one who took the time to order me a drink, I’m not gonna pass out am I?” He gives you an uneasy smile before stepping into the elevator with you. The weird sense of deja vu comes over you, sending a chill down your spine. “You haven’t checked your phone by chance, have you?” Looking up from practically spacing out, you give Jaehyun a weird look. “No, why, did I miss something?” He looks at you almost surprised, shrugging as he gets off a few floors before your stop.

“Good luck y/n.” Just as you’re about to ask him what his mood was about, he practically rushes away from the elevator, leaving you confused. When you get off on your floor, you see Taeyong and Doyoung standing nearby. You wave at them when they look your way, getting a smile in return. Something in your stomach tells you that things are going wrong when they immediately turn their backs to you and start moving in the opposite direction. You try to push the feeling down, continuing down to your office. When Karina sees you, she pulls you aside almost immediately. “Girl what the hell have you been doing?” You look at Karina with the same confusion you’ve been giving everyone, wondering what the hell you missed in the last twelve hours.

You crouch down to her level, rubbing your arm where she had pulled you aside. “What am I doing, what the hell is going on, everyone is acting like I got the plague or something.” She scans your expression with her eyes, realizing that you haven’t figured out what you’re about to. She sighs, slumping forward before looking up at you. “Okay, I guess you didn’t get my texts last night which by the way were important so don’t freak out or anything, but Xiaojun is back.” At the mention of his name, you can practically feel the color from your face leave you. The mention of ex makes you feel sick and you have to hold onto Karina to keep you from falling on your ass.

A little backstory into Xiaojun and your relationship explains your reaction and why you visibly look ill. Before the two of you became a couple, Xiaojun was an exchange student who went to your high school in hopes to get into the journaling club and that’s where you two met. He was tall, had a pretty smile and even prettier voice. Naturally, you two got close and even started to hang out after school and outside of club hours. It sounds like a typical high school romance and from the surface, it was. Until it was time for him to go back home and you were both left heartbroken and frustrated on how to resolve the underlying feelings between the two of you.

Somehow, the world kept working in your favor and Xiaojun ended up moving back once he graduated from his school back in China. The two of you went to the same university and even both got into similar classes to spend the most time together. All things were going great up until your senior year when you both applied to the job you work now. Tension started to build as you both wanted to get a spot as an intern in hopes to kickstart your career as a journalist. You knew how bad Xiaojun wanted it, but you didn’t know if you were willing to give up your dreams for your boyfriend. Yes, you did plan and hope to marry him one day and even in the toughest times, you’d still find yourself wanting to grow old with him, but when you got the spot and he didn’t, everything started to fall apart.

Both you and Xiaojun would get into fights after you got back from working all day and unknown to you, he applied as well for an actual job to the company. When he ended up getting the job, you didn’t know how to feel, I mean yes you were happy, but he also went behind your back and didn’t tell you about it until he was accepted. After all was said and done, you stuck through it and eventually was offered a job as well and to you, this was a great idea. You’d be working with your boyfriend who you loved dearly and you’d both be doing the thing you love. All was found great for about three weeks until he was offered a job at the sister company over in China.

When he brought up the offer to you, of course you were heartbroken, but you weren’t going to let him leave his dream behind to stay here with you and this somehow added more fuel to the fire. He started accusing you of wanting to take his position and even went as far to say you fell out of love with him which was far from the truth. In the end, he took the position and left overnight after a heated argument that caused you both to split. It took you years to move on from the first love of your life and when you did, you met Haechan who has been the absolute best boyfriend you could ever ask for. Sometime in the beginning, you did find yourself comparing him to your ex, but Haechan could never compare to Xiaojun because he treated you so much better.

Karina’s hand on your shoulder brought you back in, the concerned look in her eyes making you feel even worse. Everyone knew the messy breakup that happened between you and Xiaojun and everyone was sympathetic for you when you started putting all your focus into working. “Uhm, how-I mean when like what—why is this even happening?” Your voice was shaky, taking deep breaths in to calm yourself. Maybe it was the nerves that shook at the mention of his name, causing a chain reaction of old memories and emotions to resurface or maybe it was the sheer pain in your chest that drops down to your stomach when thinking of seeing him in front of you again.

“He’s supposed to come in today, but I heard from Doyoung that he’ll be in by the end of the week, I just thought I’d tell you in advance to prep you.” Immediately, you pull her into a hug to which she returns and the two of you hold one another on the floor in the back space of the office. “Keep strong, remember you have Haechan and all will be well, he doesn’t have a hold over you anymore.” Her words soothe you and she feels you relax in her embrace. You close your eyes, mentally thanking every star in the night sky for bringing you an amazing friend like Karina.

“C’mon, let’s go to my office so I can tell you about Yangyang and the shit he did last night.” Both of you get up from the floor, sitting in her office while she works on some reports and spills every little detail from her date with your boyfriend’s best friend. You thought it’d be weird going on double dates with Yangyang and Karina, but seeing as they’re not actually dating (yet), it all just feels like one big hangout amongst friends. You confide in her about your small arguments with Haechan and she now isn’t too happy with the boy of mention. “Seems to me like he’s ready to take the next big step.” You give her a look, flipping through her paper files as she types away on the computer. “And that is?”

“Moving in together, duh.” You snicker, trying to find any hint of her comment being a joke. When looking up to find her staring at you, you realize she’s joking. “Oh, you’re serious?” She shakes her head, pulling the files from you and setting them on her desk. “So you mean to tell me you haven’t thought about moving in with him at all, not even once?” Shrugging, your face scrunches up at her disappointing sigh. “L/n Y/n, you seriously haven’t thought about moving in with your boyfriend of nearly a year?”

“Not necessarily, I mean I’ve thought about it a couple times, but the thought of it always gave me stomach pains.”

“Are you sure that wasn’t just his cooking?” Jaehyun’s voice was recognizable from literally anywhere, making you whip your head around to throw up a finger at him. He smiles, slapping your hand away as you turn back to Karina. “Girl, this man is putting all the signs in front of you and you can’t even see them, see this is why you’re fighting.” She folds her arms over her chest, leaning back into her chair. “We’re not fighting, we’re simply arguing over the littlest shit which actually makes no sense in the end and we end up making up.”

“I hate to break this little counseling session, but you’re about to be late for your meeting.” You gasp, looking down at your watch to see you have barely three minutes to make it across the building. Pushing Jaehyun aside, you sprint as fast as you can through the building and bust through the doors just in time. Out of breath with your hair sticking to the light sweat that broke out on your forehead, you’re leaned over trying to catch your breath as you prop your hands on your knees. “Glad you can make it miss y/n.” The sound of Jungwoo’s voice makes you swallow thick, wiping your forehead with your sleeve as you move to grab a seat.

You can practically feel everyone’s eyes on you as you sit down, embarrassed at your unprofessional entrance. You look around the room, noticing the seat next to Jungwoo was empty. You’re about to ask Doyoung, who was sitting beside you who it belonged to before the door opened and caught everyone’s attention. “Sorry for being late everyone, I was caught up in traffic.” The familiar voice sends an uneasy chill down your spine, making your throat go dry and refusing to look in his direction. “No problem Xiaojun, please take a seat and let the meeting begin.” Jungwoo welcomed him, motioning him to the empty spot that was right across from yours.

You could feel his eyes on you, making you feel sick on the stomach. Instead of looking his way, you focused on the projector screen and tried to remain visibly calm and unaffected by his presence, but it was starting to get hard to maintain.

For the rest of the day, you stayed pretty silent and dodged every question that was being asked. You could tell people were worried and tried to be there for you, but the overwhelming shock of seeing him after nearly three years was still so fresh on your unhealed wound. Even Karina tried to keep people away from you just to let you have some space and give you time to collect your thoughts, knowing later on you’d fill her in, which you did. You called her after you left work, telling how uncomfortable it was with him staring you down and how tense the meeting was and how Doyoung pulled you aside and apologized for his unexpected announcement. Doyoung mentioned specifically he’d chew Jungwoo out for not giving him right information about his whereabouts for your sake.

“I can’t believe that happened, that’s something from like a movie.” You sigh, sticking your key into your door and pushing it open, nearly dropping your phone as you scream. Haechan, who you assumed wanted to surprise you, was standing in your living room with a plate that was covered with a metal lid. Taken aback by your reaction, he too screams and unexpectedly drops the plate which ultimately lands on his foot, furthering his scream. You throw your phone aside after telling Karina you’d call her back, scrambling down to a very much in pain Haechan. “Are you okay hyuckie, how bad does it hurt?”

Haechan moved his hands away from his bruised looking foot. You noticed the cut that was bleeding, frowning as you graze your fingers near his wound. “I’m sorry baby, I ruined your dinner.” When you looked up to meet his eyes, you immediately wanted to cry. He looked so soft and sad, like a puppy that was kicked and it broke your heart to see him apologizing over something so small. Okay, maybe it was just the weight of stress from the day that tipped the tears in your eyes to start spilling mixed in with your overly sweet boyfriend in pain apologizing for something that felt like your fault.

After you cleaned his wound up and had him propped up on the couch with a pillow under his foot, you cleaned up the mess it made and took a well-needed shower after. When you got back, you saw Haechan asleep on your couch, looking too peaceful to wake up. Grabbing the blanket from your closet, you gently drape it over him. He stirs a little, blinking up at you with a smile. “Baby, why didn’t you wake me up?” You shake your head, crouching down to hold his hand as you place a soft kiss onto his cheek. “You looked too peaceful to be woken up, plus you need to rest your foot.” He sits up a little, pushing the blanket off as he tries to get off the couch. “I can still walk, I’m not on crushes.”

You shake your head, helping him up and instead of guiding him to the door, you guide him to your room. “Why aren’t we going to my apartment?” He questions, letting you help him into bed. He knows far too well he can walk on his own, he just finds it too cute that you wanna help him around. “You’re staying with me tonight, duh.” After climbing into bed, you snuggle up to him and rest your head on his chest. His arm that you’re laying against is playing with your hair as you relax under his touch. “Wanna talk about it, your day I mean.” If you had a list of all the things you loved about him, near the top would be his attentiveness and how he seems to always know when something is troubling you.

“Maybe in the morning.” He nods, satisfied and way too tired to pry it out of you. Instead, he kisses the crown of your head and closes his eyes. His thoughts are turning and the sleepiness lets his tongue become a little unfiltered before thinking of his own words. “You know, maybe we can do this more if we lived together.” You could hear your heart beating out of your chest, only hoping that he didn’t hear it as well. You decide not to say anything, opting to go to sleep instead.

When morning comes, Haechan was still asleep and damn did he look so cute. You slowly and as quietly as you can get out of bed, get ready for work and leave your apartment with Haechan in it. You did write him a note and left it on the counter for when he wakes up before rushing out the door and praying your day would be better than yesterday. You genuinely had hopes it would, that is until you actually got to work and ran into the one person you were hoping to avoid. Xiaojun was walking just as you were, waving to you as you with return a nod. Trying to rush to the elevator, you’re starting to think the universe genuinely did enjoy shitting on you as Xiaojun made it just in time in the same elevator with you.

“What floor?” Practically spacing out, you didn’t realize he was talking to you until he got closer to you and started waving his hand in front of you. “I’m sorry, what?” For some ungodly reason, he smiles at you and repeats his question. Your tongue goes dry as you tell him and he clicks on it. You want to crawl into a hole and let the earth swallow you up when you see he only clicked on your floor, meaning he too had to get off on that floor. The rest of the ride up was tense and uncomfortably quiet.

Once the doors open, Xiaojun goes to say something and you can almost guess what he’s about to say before you run, literally run, out the elevator and run into your tiny office space and hide. As embarrassing as you probably look, you’re thankful you kept the conversation short and didn’t have to endure any more short talk with him. You pull your phone from your pocket as it starts buzzing, settling in your chair and logging into your computer. You immediately smile at the caller id, swiping right to answer and bring the phone to your ear. “Hi hyuckie.” You can practically hear his smile through the phone as he shifts around in the background. “Hi baby, i like the note you left me.” Smiling a little wider, you start to click open some unanswered emails.

“I’m glad you like it baby, I meant it too, especially the part about taking one of your toes if so much as lift a hand today.” He laughs, taking a bite of what you assume is the food you asked Yangyang to bring him for you. “Yeah yeah, don’t touch my money makers.” You snicker, holding the phone up with your shoulder as you start to reply to emails and sort through the ones that aren’t as urgent. “Anyway, have you thought of what I said last night?”

“Hm, last night?”

“Yeah, about moving in together and stuff.” The timing of his words and the email you just opened triggered a chain reaction to you feeling awfully sick. The email you received from Doyoung was his email that he got from Jungwoo, telling you that you’d have to work on a piece for an up and coming company with—you guessed it—your ex. “Baby? What’s wrong, you went super quiet.” You almost forgot you’re talking to Haechan, clearing your throat as you type a very infuriating reply to the email. “Uhm, sorry I just got distracted, can we maybe talk about this another time, I’m so sorry baby, but I just—I gotta take care of something real quick.”

You miss the defeated tone in Haechan’s voice when he bids you goodbye before hanging up the phone. As if on cue, Doyoung comes flying into your office, giving you the same sympathetic look he gave you just the day before. “Don’t do anything irrational before you send that email.” You push yourself back from your desk, swiveling your chair around to stare up at him furiously. “Are you kidding me, out of all the people in this building I just so happen to be paired up with him?”

“I know and I tried to fight Jungwoo on it, but he said what we were all thinking.” Doyoung threw his hands up in defense, trying to keep you from tearing him apart. “And that is?” You crossed your arms over your chest, waiting for something logical, anything that’ll make you believe there’s nothing to quit you from going to Jungwoo yourself. “You’re the best we have and he’s also very talented, think about it y/n, if you both work on this together—not even together, just you working on the draft and him finalizing it, it’ll give you so much light.” You hated it, you hated how right he was and how sick it made you feel. You hated that you now were forced to have contact with him and you absolutely hated how Haechan would react.

Just as you’re about to tell Doyoung you didn’t care and that there was no way in hell you’d work with Xiaojun, the man himself peaks into your office as Doyoung is leaving. “Hey y/n, can we talk?” You look to Doyoung for help, but instead he waves you goodbye and disappears amongst the crowd of your coworkers. “Uh, sure?” He leans against your desk, picking at his nails as you can only assume he’s trying to find his words. “I assume you got the email and I just wanna say I’m excited to work with you again.” You feel way too many emotions at once and it’s all overwhelming. Thankfully, he doesn’t look at you directly and can’t tell how close you are to crying.

“In celebration of being back, we’re all going out tonight and I wanted to know if you’re coming or not.” You want to say no, you want to scream it from the top of the building and tell him to eat shit for coming back into your life as if nothing happened, as if he didn’t break you, but you pull it together and shrug. “I guess, if Karina goes of course, don’t wanna be with you alone somewhere.” The last part comes out completely by accident and it throws Xiaojun off. He smiles, taking his leave, leaving you to try and filter your thoughts.

The rest of the day goes by relatively normal and you made sure to text Haechan that you were found out with work friends for dinner. To much surprise, he didn’t ask why and told you to have fun. You told him you’d be back not too late and somehow that was the opposite of how the night ended. When you all left work, everyone immediately wanted to get dinner and have a good time. You on the other hand kept close to Karina even though she invited Yangyang. Karina made the promise to stay by you regardless of her state, but two shots into the night and she was off somewhere dancing on tables with her (soon to be)boyfriend cheering her on.

Awkward tension was surrounding you and Xiaojun as people kept congratulating you both on getting such a big story to cover and to be honest, it didn’t feel like a real celebration. By the end of the night, Karina had lost your keys somewhere between the bathroom and the bar she was clinging to. Xiaojun of course had to be the first to offer you a ride home with the drunk (not yet)couple in his backseat and although you wanted to call Haechan, you felt bad if you got him out the comfort of his bed at this ungodly hour. The drive on the other hand was a breeze since Karina and Yangyang kept spewing nonsense and directly talking shit about Xiaojun.

When you pulled up to your apartment, Xiaojun got out of the car as you did, watching you walk towards your building. Turning around due to the feeling of being watched, you saw him leaning against his door. “Why are you watching me, it’s uncomfortable.” He smiled, shaking his head as reopened his door. “Just making sure you get inside safely.” You chose the safest option and turned back around without a word and went up to your apartment. The only thing you wanted right now was to crawl into your bed after an amazingly hot shower and sleep your worries away, instead you were met with a very upset looking Haechan standing at your front door.

“Hi baby.” You mumble, pushing your door open and walking past him. “Who was that?” His question threw you off, turning to him to see him standing in your doorway with furrowed brows. “Who are you talking about?”

“Pretty boy making heart eyes at my girlfriend, the one whose car you got out of?” You could see the hurt written across his face, making you frown. “Baby, he was no one, don’t worry about him.” He scoffs, dropping his crossed arms to run his fingers through his hair. “He’s not one of your coworkers I’ve seen before, so please y/n, just tell me who the hell was that guy.” You’ve never seen him so upset before, his eyes were glossy and yet there was a lingering anger that you could see in his eyes. “He’s my ex boyfriend—I know it looks bad I know, but I can explain perfectly.”

He looks down at his feet, silently waiting for you to give your explanation. “He used to work at the came company, but he ended up moving back home to work at the sister company and we broke up—I promise you hyuck there’s nothing going on between us, he just dropped me off because Karina lost my keys and they all wanted to celebrate him coming back and I didn’t have a ride ho-“

“Why didn’t you call me?” It was all too much, your senses overwhelmed. Both of you were a mess, crying as you each tried to keep it together. “It’s late and you’re hurt and I didn-“

He scoffed, taking a step back and out your front door. “So you take a ride with your ex instead of calling your boyfriend..is he the reason you don’t wanna move in with me?” Shaking your head, you try to reach out for him in hopes he’d let you in, instead he shuts you out and takes another step back. “Please hyuck, I do wanna move in with you, I just can’t.” Everything was happening too fast, Haechan silently went back to his apartment leaving you falling to your knees in tears with your door wide open.

That night, you felt empty inside. It seemed dramatic, but you truly never had such a bad fight with Haechan before. Sure, you two would have small petty fights, but this one ripped your heart right out your chest and all you could think of was how he might leave you. The next morning, you laid in your bed, crying on the pillow Haechan used each time he stayed over. You had already told Doyoung you’d be working from home for the rest of the week, making up an excuse that you were sick and didn’t feel like coming into work and risking everyone else getting it as well. Of course Doyoung wished you a good recovery and told you he’d email you everything you needed.

As the day passed, you laid dormant in your bed while watching the sun rise and fall from its shine through your window. A knock on your front door caught your attention, immediately rushing up from your bed and running through your apartment to answer it. When you opened the door, you were hoping to be met with Haechan, instead you saw Karina holding a duffel bag. “Don’t just stand there, lemme in, it’s cold.” You stepped aside, sniffling as she entered your apartment. You could hear shuffling coming from down the hall, watching Yangyang come up and to Haechan’s door along with Renjun and Mark. They all gave you a sympathetic smile when seeing you nearly break down, knocking on Haechan’s door.

You stood there, waiting for it to open just to get a glimpse. You needed to see him, almost desperate to see him and you wanted nothing more to have him back in your arms. Mark picked his phone from his pocket, answering it and nodding before hanging up his call. “He said it’s unlocked.” Both boys nodded at the other before giving you one last look before they all disappeared into Haechan’s apartment. Karina gently guided you from your door, holding you when you turned into her arms and let it all go.

Not exactly how long you stood by your door crying into her shirt, but being the amazing friend she is, she held you as you let it all out. The stress from work, the stress and pain from being forced to be around Xiaojun and the stress and pain of worrying of losing Haechan was all too much and you finally let it all out. Once you had calmed down, both you and Karina settled in your bed and watched your favorite moves for the rest of the night till you got hungry. “Go shower and I’ll order food.” You could only nod, imagining how bad you smelt from wallowing in your bed all day.

As you got in the shower, Karina ordered your favorite take out and waited till it was delivered. She went to get it from the delivery man when she spotted Haechan coming up to his apartment. Not knowing if she should say hello or not, she paid for the food and stood awkwardly in your doorway. From the looks of it, he looked just as bad as you did. Hair unkept to, clothes inside out and mismatching and he overall looked heartbroken. She started to think he didn’t notice her, until he finally made eye contact. “How..is she?” She too felt her eyes start to sting thinking about you and how softly you tried to cry in the shower when she passed by.

“She’s not herself, but I got her.” He simply nodded, standing in front of his door for a minute. “Karina, did the food come?” Your voice caught both of their attentions, making Karina turn around and shut the door before she caught sight of him. When the door shut, Haechan silently cried as he entered his apartment, being brought into a group hug with the three boys.

A few weeks had passed since your fight with Haechan and both of you were avoiding each other, despite how much you wanted to talk to one another. When he was coming in from work, you’d be opening the door for Karina or leaving to go meet up with Xiaojun for work. I know, meeting with your ex when you and your boyfriend aren’t talking isn’t ideal, but Jungwoo got down your throat about your project and wanted a final draft soon. Karina kept telling you to man up and text him first, be the bigger person and to ‘get it over with’ so she doesn’t have to see you mope around.

In your defense—you tried to text him and every time you did you could see the three little bubbles indicating he was too trying to text you. You always chickened out, waiting for him to finish his text, only to be saddened when the bubbles disappear and your heart breaks all over again. As you’re sitting on your couch binging It’s Okay To Not Be Okay for the fifth time this week, you hear a knock on your door and don’t think much of it. When you get off the couch and finally open the door, to much surprise you don’t see who you expect. Usually when you hear a knock, it’s typically Karina and if she can’t come, she’ll send Yangyang in her place. You were even hoping it’d be Haechan, instead you were met with a very smiley Xiaojun.

You notice the flowers—your favorite flowers in his hand and a bag of what smells like your favorite food. The old you probably would’ve swooned at him standing in front of you, but the person you are now is completely taken aback by his unannounced arrival, more importantly how did he remember where you lived. “What do you want?” Now he looks taken aback, not expecting your reaction. “I uh, can I come in, it’s kinda cold out here.” You relax, leaning against your door frame with arms crossed over your chest. “No, now answer my question.” He takes in a deep breath, swallowing thickly while trying to avoid your gaze.

“Well, it’s our anniver—“

“Was our anniversary, past tense.”

“Yeah, was, um, but I thought you’d like to come out with me, but judging by your absence at work I decided to come to you instead.” Your deadpan expression should give away how you feel, but you almost forget who you’re dealing with. He was the same way when you two dated, completely oblivious to your feelings despite your body language giving it away. “Xiaojun, I’m sorry if you got some mixed signals by me being in your general presence, but I have a boyfriend actually and I’m not really into the douchebag type anymore, sorry.”

He scoffs, dropping his hand that was holding the flowers. “You could’ve just said no, you don’t have to make up having a boyfriend.” You’re not exactly sure how the universe managed to pull this off, but just as Xiaojun was finishing his sentence, Haechan was walking up to his door with Yangyang and Mark. “Actually, that’s my boyfriend right there, wave hi.” You point to Haechan who was confused seeing you and your ex staring at him. “Who, the one with blonde hair?” You visibly gag, shaking your head while Mark snickers at the very offended Yangyang. “Ew, no, the brunette, that’s the boyfriend, so sorry, bye bye now.” You give Xiaojun a little shove away from your door, pushing him a little further before going back into your apartment.

You almost miss the look Haechan is giving you, making your stomach turn upside down with butterflies that cry out for him. Something inside tells you to stay, to hope he comes over and scoops you up and kisses you to make up for each kiss he missed out, but you choose to hold it together and shut your door before you completely break down all over again.

Another long week passed with no word from Haechan and you’re starting to think he’s never going to talk to you again. By the end of the week, you’re fed up with it all. You’re over the silence from his end and the avoided eye contact in the hall when passing one another, you’re especially over spending your first year anniversary alone in bed in the morning. Thankfully it was a weekend and you didn’t have to go into work with puffy eyes and tear stained cheeks, opting to finally confront Haechan and sort through the shit show your relationship has come to.

Sometime between crying to old Taylor Swift songs and brushing your teeth, you go over what you want to say to him in case he breaks up with you and the thought leaves a bitter taste on your tongue that the brush cannot get rid of. You finish getting ready for the day, taking your time to eat breakfast in hopes that it all goes well. Karina had called earlier, trying to give you a pep-talk and hype you up, but she only added fuel to your nervousness. Deciding to stop stalling anymore, you leave your apartment and stand frozen in front of Haechan’s door. The butterflies in your stomach are beating against you, rushing around to be set free.

With a deep breath, you knock on his door and await in the background noise of the city. After some shuffling, you see Haechan swing the door open and you feel your knees giving in just by the sight of him. His hair has been trimmed, combed nicely and parted even with what you assume is styling gel. He was wearing some of his nicer clothes in his closet, no suit and tie, but more of his favorite jeans and a shirt that complements both his shirt and skin tone. He has his shoes on, as if he was about leave and part of you is terrified to know where he was going. “Go back home, you’re not supposed to be here.”

Now you’re a little taken aback by him, furrowing your brows as he immediately realizes how harsh that sounds. “No, no not like that—I mean I had things planned and I was supposed to come to you and it was supposed to be roman—“ As expected, you completely melt as he tries to explain and instead of staring at him like he’s an idiot—(he is but he’s your idiot)—you pull on his collar and take him into a very awaited kiss. Haechan is just as surprised as you are, hesitating a little before wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you into his apartment to hold you closer.

The two of you share an intimate and very much missed kiss, holding one another until you’re both out of breath and pull back. “I missed you hyuck.” You couldn’t see the goofy boyish smile he had, his heart doing flips in his chest at the use of the nickname. “I missed you even more baby, I promise I’ll never go that long without you again, I mean it baby.” Letting out the breath of relief, you took this moment to re-familiarize yourself with Haechan. His touch was still the same, gentle yet firm when he held you. His lips were still as soft as ever, a little dry—but a few swipes of chapstick never hurt anyone.

“I think we should talk about this all, I really do—but I have a surprise first.” You look up at him, smiling as he grabs both of your hands and leads you out of his apartment. “Where are we going?” He shakes his head at you, wiggling his finger after making sure his door was locked. “It’s a surprise woman, don’t ask me questions I can’t answer.” You roll your eyes at him, sticking your tongue out to which he blows a kiss. Following him down to his car, you both get in and head out for whatever his surprise was. You start to look around, heading just a little further down in the city to an area that was somewhat familiar.

“Alright, we’re here.” Once he parked the car, both you and Haechan got out of the car and he took your hand into his. Giving his hand a squeeze, he returned the squeeze with a smile. “You look beautiful by the way, especially when you’re telling your ex off.” You snicker, rolling your eyes at him while following alongside. The two of you walk up to a cafe door, Haechan covering your eyes with one hand as he pulls the door open. “Okay, now take a couple steps forward—but be careful not to fall, I cannot afford to spend our first anniversary at the hospital.”

“And if I do, don’t judge me.” He only smiles, coming in behind you as he still holds his hands over your eyes. You can feel how close he’s gotten, his breath fanning your neck as he drops his hand and you finally take in everything. There were rose petals scattered all over the floor of the cafe that the two of you first met, all leading to the table you were seated that day and circling around it. On the table was your favorite dinner from a chain restaurant that you two ordered on your first official date and along the wall are polaroids you took at the reception of Johnny’s wedding.

Tears began to swell in your eyes, turning around to pull him close and peck small kisses all over his face. He holds your waist, taking in the affection he missed so much. “I know we have a lot to talk about and a lot of explaining to do for the distance between us these last few week, but right now I just want you to know I love you, I’m head over heels in love with you and I wouldn’t have asked for anyone else to want to spend my life with.”

“We’ll talk about that later, for now, I just wanna be with you.” Haechan didn’t have any problem with that, leading you over to the table where you two sat and ate and talked for hours. He told you about how the boys tried to cheer him up and even helped him rent the cafe out for the day—which was very expensive, he mentioned. You told him the full backstory about Xiaojun and Haechan fully understood why you didn’t want him around. Regardless of him being your ex, the two of you were just no good and created a bad environment for you to be in. For the rest of the night, you both danced around the cafe to music Haechan could sing on the spot and had the best night to end your perfectly imperfect first anniversary.

©︎𝐋𝐈𝐋𝐈𝐀𝐍𝐒𝐔𝐍., 2022

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callsignfangs · 3 months

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141 + Fangs with the reader who has a paper star making addiction. (Platonic) /nf

You feed me so well pooks 😇

For context: Fangs is also a CoD oc sorta thingy of mine 😚 I’ll add theirs at the end for anyone who’s interested 💟💟

141 + Fangs & Paper star addicted reader <3

Price:

• Really doesn’t get it. He adores how often you gift them to him but has absolutely no clue what to do with them.

• Ended up repurposing one of his desk drawers to fill them with. Also generally always has some laying around.

• Is irrationally pissy whenever someone insults them. Think they’re weird? At least his partner loves him enough to spend their time making things for him instead of shitty storebought gifts every other month, Samantha.

Gaz:

• Is absolutely giddy about them.

• Learns to make them with you so you two can make a collection together 😇

• Came up with the idea of making them out of sugar paper and incorporating them into food as well, bc why not??

• Puts them literally everywhere. He has little tupperware boxes and mugs full of them placed all over his room.

Ghost:

• Secretly loves sitting and watching you make them. Seeing your fingers curl around the paper with each other fold, it’s just mesmerising to him.

• Can’t get the hang of it himself, though. Poor lad’s fumbling, catching his fingers on every other corner, his hands are just too big.

• Has at least one on him at all times. On a mission? Scattered across his vest pockets. Out running errands? One on the specially made keychain his house keys are on.

• Gets surprisingly upset if any of them get ripped/damaged. Still has a few on his floor because god knows this man has knocked over piles or containers of them, and/or used them as extra ammo during pillow fights.

Soap:

• Similar to Gaz, also very happy about them 😇

• Incorporates them into random things in his life. Definitely shaved a few stars into his mohawk. Maybe even got a star-related tattoo.

• Has them literally everywhere. Whenever he cleans up or redecorates his room, he’ll find at least a dozen just strewn about.

• Can’t exactly get the hang of tiny paper stars either, so whenever he makes them with you he gets big strips of paper so he can actually fold them.

• Always complains about how disarming explosives/tinkering with the tiny, intricate little bits in his snipers is somehow easier than folding those stupid bloody bits of paper.

• Angst warning ahead - Have you lot seen that tiktok video of the person who’s father hid rubber ducks around their house, and after he passed they found one in the console of their car? Yeah. That’s what you’re met with after MW3. You’re welcome 😇 (edit: found it on reddit instead of tt 😚)

Fangs:

• A little confused at first, but eventually catches up with it.

• Will get deeply upset if they lose one you’ve gifted them. Yeah, they have at least three hundred others, but it was a gift from you!!

• Like Soap, starts bringing them into projects. Impulsively starts a full art project based completely around them, and has to shamefully slink over and ask you to make them more 😇

• Sorta gets the hang of them. To say they’re a bit wonky is an understatement, but they’re trying their best, and they don’t really mind as long as they’re having fun (silently raged for at least half an hour over them).

• Paints a star on their favourite rifle. Price wasn’t very happy when they went on a night mission and he spotted a little painted star glowing in the dark, and they very reluctantly peeled of the paint and replaced it with a less noticeable colour.

Giggle donee 😇 My brains been kinda rotting over this lately and I have a Farah ask that I’m going a liiil feral over so yippee 🎉 (if ur seeing this i love u farah anon(s?) /p 😋)

Okok yaya but thanks pooks this dragged me out of my like writing hole very happy 💪

#call of duty #cod #cod fanfic #cod mw3 #cod fandom #cod mw2 #cod fic #tf 141 #task force 141 #kyle gaz garrick #captain price #john price #john soap mactavish #simon ghost riley #oc #cod oc #yummy yum yum #fangs asks #fangs drabbles

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lyn-js · 10 days

Text

Dancing under the Moonlight | Chapter 2. Love in the Limelight

Bradley Bradshaw x OC Reader (Nickname Honey)

Summary: After the Uranium Mission, Bradley Bradshaw decides he wants to settle down. Maybe even start a family at some point in time. But he felt so tired (and old) to be in the dating scene. That's until he sees a beautiful new bartender at The Hard Deck. Not only that; turns out she's Penny's niece, Beatrice. They both hit it off amazing, but for some reason, Beatrice isn't letting her walls down yet. But Bradley is going to get to the bottom of what Bea's big secret is.

Warnings: Swearing, angst, drinking, mentions of past abuse, fluff, eventually smut 18+, age gap (24 & 35)

It was finally the weekend!! Even though this was gonna be a group outing, you wanted to try your best to dress a little nice for Bradley.

Chantal was with you when you were getting ready, even your Aunt and cousin were a little worried about you. You changed three times in 5 minutes. You changed your hairstyle so many times your hair could probably stick up with all the hairspray you have in it. But you just went with a simple top and some jean shorts. You finally come jutting down the stairs, and everyone's eyes are on you.

Chantal gets up from the couch and makes her way to the front door with her bag and keys. “You finally decided on something?” you just give her a little nod, while also grabbing your bag and keys. But when you turn back she is giving you a sympathetic smile. “We are going to have fun tonight, Okay? Stop worrying about what he’ll think of you. Plus, if he doesn't like it, you can drop his ass.” you both let out a chuckle. But you're stopped when you see Penny walk up to you both. “Yea listen to C. Don’t worry so much about how you look. Go and have fun, pulse you are already beautiful. Since the day you were born.” She gently caresses your cheek, and then gives you a small kiss in the same spot. You try and hold back the tears that were welling in your eyes. You remember your mom always saying that to you when you were feeling down, or sad. She would always know how to make you smile again. But, now that she’s gone you never really heard those words again. Ever since then, your Aunt Penny has tried so hard to be a mom to you, and you will always be grateful for her doing that. You kiss her back and hug Ames, also promising her that you will try and get her a prize from the bowling alley. So, you and Chantal make your way out, budding goodbye to your Aunt, and make your way over to The Hard Deck for your shift.

Before Chantal starts up her vintage cherry red Mustang, “Hey C, are the girls still on to join us?” I ask when I finish buckling into my seat. She chuckles and gives me a warm smile, “Hell yeah girl! When I told them we were having a girl's night, while also spotting some cute aviators by our side. Honey, I could even get the question out fast enough without them saying yes. She puts on her sunglasses, starts the car, and off The Hard Deck, we go.

Just as when Chantal is pulling into the parking lot you spot the infamous Blue Bronco, and you’re practically jumping out of the moving car, trying to get in the bar as fast as possible so you can see the one person you've been dying to see for days now.

(Bradley’s POV)

When I hear the doors open at the front I whip my head around and see the girl I’ve been waiting for all day. Nat pauses her game of pool with Bob to come see what I’m losing my head over. But, she looks in my field of direction and sees a brunette girl, who seems to be with her friend looking around for somebody. When they look over in our direction she sees the brunette face light up when she looks at Rooster. That must be the “mystery girl” he keeps talking to. So, they make their way over.

I see Beatrice come crashing over to us, and she gives me a small wave, and a small “Hi.”

“Are we still on for tonight pretty girl,” I ask her. But the next second she freezes up, like the wind got knocked out of her. Why the hell would you say that? She probably thinks you're crazy for calling her that!

But I see her take a deep breath and try and speak to me. “Y-yeah… I’ll call the rest of my friends to come meet us here.” She seemed to snap out of whatever daze she was in to see the person next to her nudging her in the ribs.

She looks over at her friend whom she finally introduces. “Oh, everyone this is my best friend Chantal. Chantal this is Lieutenant. Bradley Bradshaw, Lieutenant. Robert Floyd, and Lieutenant. Natasha Trace.” She gives a silent wave to me and Bob. But, when I look over to see Nat, for some reason I see a little glimmer in her eye. I know for a fact that she would kick me in the balls if I said anything about it to her. So for now, I just keep my piece and focus my attention back on Bea.

We have a light conversation for a couple of minutes until she has to be on the clock. But as soon as she leaves, I already miss her presents, even though she is right up at the bar a couple of feet away. It feels like she’s miles away from me. I just want to be near her all the time.

Within the hour more of the squad makes its way into the bar, and when they do, Bea makes her stops to introduce herself along with Chantal. Who I might add has taken up all of Natasha’s attention by talking each other’s ears off. So, for the rest of her shift, I would come up from time to time, seeing if she was alright, and watch her over from the pool tables.

I stop focusing on the game of pool to see Hangman making his way over to Beatrice.

(Back to Your POV)

After some grueling hours wiping down tables, making drinks, and trying my best not to crack underpressure. I’m finally done tonight. Luckily Aunt Penny came in an hour later, so we wouldn’t be swamped with so many people at the bar.

Just as I’m about to head out from behind the bar, out of the corner of my eye, I see someone come up. I wanted to assume it was Bradley to come check on me for the fourth time tonight. But when I turned around to see a tall, blond, cocky-looking man leaning over the bar top with a toothpick in his mouth.

For some reason, I walk back over to see what he wants. I don’t even get the question out of what he would like when he starts to speak up. “What’s a pretty girl like you doing behind a bar?” “I’m getting off my shift right now,” I tell him.

“Well, why don’t you come out with me and my friends tonight? Probably hit the town. I might even take you somewhere private.” He gives me a mischievous smile while raising his eyebrows at me. He probably doesn’t know that I’m with the group tonight. So I’ll just play a little game with him, until he gets the hint.

“I’m sorry…” genuinely asking for his name, but still playing dumb with him. “Hangman. But you can call me Jake darlin’,” he says to me while he flicks the other end of the toothpick around in his mouth.

I’m sorry… Jake. But I don’t feed off of protein powder, and small dick insecurity,” I smile back at him. He falters a little but comes back in seconds. “Oh, I like em’ feisty. How about I leave you my number and call me sometime?” I just give a little chuckle and seize up to him so he can also stand up straight.

“Yea, call me and let me know when you can actually satisfy a woman in bed.” Just as he was about to say something else, Bradley came up to the bar top and stood next to Jake. I smile ear to ear when he arrives, and I can see the same expression on his face. I pan over to Jake and see him a whole lot little shocked.

“H-hey Bradley,” you tell him with a little bit of weariness in my voice. “Hey Bea, are we ready to go?” he asked back. I was about to say that I needed to ask Penny first if I could go. But she already beat me to it, coming up behind me to answer his question.

“She’s all yours Rooster. Just bring her back home in one piece. Okay?” He just gives a little salute back to her which of course makes me laugh.

After that, I get out from behind the bar and go right into Bradley’s side. But all of a sudden we stop and he pulls me closer to his body already giving me more chills down my spine and leans down to whisper to me, “He wasn’t giving you any problems was he?” He asks in a curious tone.

“Don’t worry B, I straightened him out a little bit.” Out of the blue, he kisses my temple and mumbles “That’s my girl” to himself, but you hear him anyways. He probably didn’t mean it. You think to yourself.

So, after everyone wrapped up with their pool and darts games it was time to go bowling.

After Chantal and Natasha convinced me it was a good idea to ride over to the alley with Bradley. We both knew what was up their tricky little sleeves, so me and Bradley told them they should ride together also.

That’s how you ended up in the passenger seat of Bradley’s Bronco when pulling up to the bowling alley.

After he parks the car, we see Chantal and Nat pull right in next to us and then comes the rest of the squad. When you try and open the door, you’re stopped by Bradley who’s moving closer to you while closing the door. I just look back at him.

“What are you doing pretty girl?” he asks me with raised eyebrows. Opening the door… What are you doing?” He looked dumbfounded at this point when I was answering that question. “Bea, my mother would be rolling in her grave if she found out I let you open your own door. Ya know I can feel her right now telling me off for not being a gentleman.

Now I was dumbfounded. I did want to ask him about what happened, but I didn’t want to pressure him into talking about stuff that was hard for him. So, I’m not going to get into it with him. He rushes out of the driver seat and comes running over to the passenger side to be a gentleman and open my door.

As I’m unbuckling I see him open my door, and give the fanciest bow he could give, and so I just play along. “Oh, ever the gentlemen!” I put my heart on my chest. But then jump out and follow everyone in.

When you get in you and Chantal, go ahead of everyone to see your friends Jesse, Georgia, Scarlett, Coco, and Rose. We all walk them over to the other group to introduce them to each other.

When you get a good look at the other guys from the group, it almost looks like their eyes are about to fall out of their sockets.

But you let the girls get to introduce themselves, and they seem to be enjoying it. Maybe enjoying themselves a little too much, but we all make our way to the front to get our lanes ready.

Once we got into our lanes, we decided to split the girls and the guys.

Then we were paired up, Javy and Coco, Micky and Rose, Ruben and Jesse, Bob and Georgia, Jake and Scarlett, Natashe and Chantal, and finally Bradley and Beatrice.

We went into three different lanes, and of course, there was an odd number of people that left me and Bradley in one lane by ourselves. I even see Chantal and Nat in the lane next to us giving lovely Dovey looks at me and Bradley. But I can see the same feeling when Chantal is with Nat.

A couple of years ago Chantal came out to you as bisexual, You asked her why she hadn’t told you sooner.

Her answer was that you wouldn’t want to be friends with her if she told. That made you want to slap her silly and tell her she was completely wrong. At the end of that night, you both ended up in your bed cuddling while eating junk food, with lots of tears and telling her if she ever gets her heart broken, you will hunt that person down to the end of their days.

So, you can truly believe Natasha was a good person, and you truly believed she would love Chantal till the end of time.

You could only wish that could happen to you.

And Hour goes by and you all are having a good time, eating, drinking and laughing our asses off. You don’t know who, but someone started a bet with each lane.

If someone misses the lane, and the ball goes in the gutter. That lane would have to do 50 push-ups. I feel really terrible for me and Bradley because when it was my turn I would go up I would miss.

Every single time!

You can’t really remember what count you’re both on. It might be 150… or 60. But you would just always look over at Bradley and feel really bad that he was also doing this punishment with you.

After you both are finally done with that count, you walk back to the seats, sit down, and finally get a chance to breath. You look over, and your face on with his arm. His muscles look so defined and huge. You just want to wrap your arms around them and never let go.

We are out having a good time. Now stop thinking about him like that Bea!

I finally spoke up and said something. “I’m really sorry we’re making us do push-ups. Not really expecting work to come follow you.” I put my head down. Shying away from him looking at me. “Hey, Bea… look at me, pretty girl.” When I look up he takes his finger and puts it under my chin so we are making direct contact with his hazel irises. “You don’t need to apologize. It just bowling. Plus, at least I can be able to do them with you and not Jake.”

We both giggle, but that stops when we see Chantal and Natasha making kissing noises at us. So, together you and Bradley both flip them off and return back to your game.

Once again Bradley makes a strike on his turn, he comes over to give you a high five and sits next to you. When you look up to see your name highlighted on the monitor telling you it is your turn, you just let out a sigh and brace yourself to get down on the floor and do another round of push-ups.

But all of a sudden when you are about to swing your ball back you feel a pair of hands on your shoulders stopping you.

You turn around and see it was Bradley, he comes down so he can talk to you. “I think you might need help instead of just wracking your ball in the gutter,” he tells me while pointing to our lane. “Well, teach me. See if I’m really any good,” I give him a little smirk, and Bradley copies the same expression on his face.

He stands behind you, and your back is flush against his front. And wrapping his arms around your own, almost looking like he was holding the bowling ball himself.

He bends down a little so he can talk to me again, “What you want is a good stance.” So he moves his hands from the ball and bends down to move you legs to the same position he’s in.

“Then, bring your arms back” he puts his burly hands over you and you both swing the ball back and then down the lane it goes.

It feels like you’ve been holding your breath for an eternity, feeling like the ball was going down the land so slowly and just waiting for it to hit the pins.

Then you hear the pins fall. You finally got a strike. When you see all the pins disappear, you start to freak out with excitement. Squealing and jumping up and down like a kid in a candy store. Then you turn around to give Bradley a big hug, and he wraps his arms around you and spins you in circles.

“Did you see that? I got a strike bitches!” You yell at the top of your lungs. You see everyone from the group cheer for you, even the people from the other lanes whistle for your lucky shot.

You look up at the monitor and see the little animation for the strike. It stops and tells you that your turn is still up. So you turn back to him, “I didn’t think I learned the first time. Can you show me again?” you ask him with a cheeky grin. “For you pretty girl, anything.” So you get your ball from the ball return, and wait for Bradley to come up behind you, and help you get back in your stance.

This night can’t get any better.

Once we were all done with the bowling alley, there was a beautiful sunset, and there was a boardwalk nearby. So, we all got in our cars and made our way over there.

When we all got there we decided to split up for a little bit when some of the group wanted to go on rides or go play some carnival games.

But, you and Bradley just decide to walk around not to do anything, and just wanting to be in each other's presence. While along the walk, you and Bradley kept brushing your hands together, not knowing how were going to initiate the first move. But before you can think, you take a leap and pick up Bradley’s hand and interlock your and his together. He doesn't want to make you uncomfortable so he keeps looking outwards at everything around him.

But you could feel him give your hand a gentle squeeze, and a couple of seconds later he brought your interlocked hands up to his lips and gave your knuckles a light kiss. Your heart was about to explode out of your chest you were so happy. So, you wrap your other hand around his bicep and continue on your quiet stroll.

You almost forgot to get Amelia a prize from the arcade at the bowling alley, so you dragged Bradley over to one of the games to try and win a small prize. And of course, you have no luck when trying to win any games, so you let Bradley try.

And of course, he wins the first time, and the second, and third. Now, you were carrying a giant teddy bear and two smaller prizes to his Bronco.

How is he so fucking good at everything? I wonder if he’s this good in bed-

“Would you care to have a walk with me on the beach?” he closes the door to the backseat where the bear was occupying his giant, fluffy frame. “Don’t mind if I do Lieutenant.” You both take off your shoes, interlock your hands again, and descend to the sandy shoreline.

You both walk in silence for a little bit before you both speak up at the same time. But he lets you go first. “Bradley… what is… what is this thing between us?” you ask him. But I cut him off. “Well, I know what it is… maybe. I just don’t want one of us to get the wrong signals, and in the end, someone gets hurt-” his finger cuts you off on your lips to make your stupid ass stop rambling.

“Listen, Bea, I definitely know what this is, and trust me, nobody is going to get hurt. By the looks of it, we both know something is here between us.” “I… can we just take this slow for a little bit please?” “Absolutely pretty girl.”

You see him grab something out of his back pocket and unravel a cord. You see him offer you an earbud. And hold up what looks to be like a very janky iPod Shuffle. Your mouth is agape when you see him put the opposite earbud in his ear. “Care for a dance, m’lady?”

I’m still in shock, but I let out a hardy laugh. “Bradley Bradshaw I know for a fact you did not bring an iPod on the beach to slow-dance with me!” I’m still laughing when he starts to sway from side to side. My laughing dies down, and I eventually give in.

I grab the unused earbud place it in my ear, and see him press play. Some 80s hit play, even though they were super upbeat, we swayed in silence. One part listening to music, the other listening to the waves crash on the shore.

‘You’re Gonna Miss Me’ by Connie Francis starts playing. you look down a little, to see a gold chain peaking out of his shirt. You don’t know why but you reach up and touch the cross. You look up at him finding he already had his eyes on you. “It used to be my mom's. But after…” Now I’m the one to cut him off. “Hey, if you don’t want to talk about it, I’m not gonna force you. Plus, I don’t want you to feel like you have to tell me everything-” He steps closer connecting both of your lips to his own.

It wasn’t a harsh kiss, to say the least, it was soft and gentle. But you know there was so much more behind it. But you are not getting into that right now.

So, keep kissing this really attractive guy it is.

You both break apart and connect your foreheads, both trying to catch your breath. “That was… fun,” you both let out a chuckle. You suddenly speak up, “Honey.” you move away from him a little bit to see his eyebrows raised. “My nickname is Honey. I only let people call me that if they’re close to me.”

He just nods and gives you a soft kiss on the lips. “Okay, Honey.” then he wraps you into his embrace, and continues to sway back and forth listing to the rest of the song.

Finally, for once in your life, you’re wrong for the right reason. And you're pretty damn happy about that.

Reblogs are always welcome. Unless you're under 18. I will block you. and comment if you want to be added to the taglist. If I forgot anybody message me and let me know. You will be added.

Taglist: @caitsymichelle13 @shanimallina87 @angelbabyyy99 @callsign-magnolia @nerdgirljen

Once again dividers are by @saradika

#bradley rooster bradshaw #tgm fic #rooster x reader #rooster top gun #tgm oc #top gun maverick #bradley bradshaw x reader #top gun fanfiction

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daechwitatamic · 2 years

Text

Chapter 6: Other Storms || KTH

(banner by @itaeewon)

Title: What Was Hidden (Masterpost)

Rating: explicit, minors DNI pls

Genre: college!au, angst, eventual smut, strangers -> friends -> lovers -> idiots -> lovers

Pairings: Taehyung x female reader, MYG x OC

Summary: This is how it all starts: Taehyung is flunking Western Lit. You’re assigned to tutor him. His paper on Strindberg’s The Ghost Sonata could pass or fail him for the semester. As you and Taehyung slowly become friends, then more, you learn that there’s a lot more to him than you originally assumed. Together, you navigate your own experiences with the play’s themes: one’s “true self” versus one’s “shown self”, darkness behind the facade, and how people can be quite literally haunted - and it has nothing to do with ghosts.

In which you get snowed in at the boys' house.

Chapter Warnings: language, drinking

Word Count: 4k

I saw the sun and thought I saw what was hidden The Ghost Sonata | Scene III August Strindberg

Chapter 6: Other Storms

Friday, November 23rd

The forecast for Friday calls for practically blizzard conditions, some of the weather-people calling for up to damn near three feet of snow. You can practically feel it coming, the air just feels like snow, smells like snow. It’s clear that everyone on campus is keyed up in anticipation - no one pays any attention in your first two classes, and your third one gets canceled completely. You head home, intending on getting comfy, but the girls have other plans.

“Good, you’re here,” Bridget says, before you even get the door all the way open. “Get dressed, we’re going to Jin’s.”

“It’s snowing,” you point out.

“Yeah, she says. “That’s the point. We’re getting snowed in.”

You look at Kiko, hoping for some answers.

“Jin and Yoongi bought a ton of food,” she tells you flatly - clearly Bridget has been being a little Bridget about the plans. “We’re going to go over, eat dinner, drink and play board games and shit, and then walk back.”

“In the snow,” you clarify. “In a blizzard.”

Bridget rolls her eyes. “Come on, Y/N, it’ll be fine. We’re going to have fun.”

You look at Kiko again. Sometimes it felt like Bridget was six unsensible people in one, and Kiko was the only other voice of reason you could find.

“What are the chances we’ll get stuck there overnight?” you ask her.

“I’m packing my toothbrush,” she tells you.

An hour later, the three of you are trudging through campus. There are already almost two inches on the ground since it started, and it isn’t supposed to stop until mid-morning tomorrow. This is just the outskirts of the weather system anyway - the storm isn’t supposed to hit until later that night, with forecasted winds at almost hurricane levels. Twitter is already calling it a Bomb Cyclone.

“If I end up sleeping on a couch tonight, I will be very mad,” you inform everyone.

“Please,” Bridget scoffs. “You two are both guaranteed a bed. It’s me that’s the floater. My goal is to get Jungkook drunk enough that he’ll let me cuddle.”

You and Kiko both crack up, but you manage to defend yourself through the laughter. “I am not guaranteed a bed,” you say. “We’ve kissed. Once. And I was wearing this.” You pat happily at your very puffy winter coat. It’s not sexy, but damn you are warm and toasty. Your toothbrush sticks out of your pocket.

“We all know he wouldn’t tell you no, though,” she says.

“We don’t know anything of the sort,” you mumble. Kiko gives you a disapproving nudge. Bridget stops walking and faces you completely.

“You need to stop playing it down like he doesn’t actually like you,” she tells you firmly. “He does - you know it, we know it, he knows it. The guys know it. You’re going to mess it up if you don’t go in more confidently.”

Isn’t that almost the same thing you’d told Kiko last week?

You text Taehyung when the house is in sight - “I’m at your house 😊😊”. His answer comes in as Jin opens the front door for you girls -

[8:47 PM] Taehyung: i’m not there ☹️☹️☹️

You haven’t had time to process this before being swept into the house. Yoongi and Jimin are on opposite ends of one of the couches, Taehyung and Jungkook nowhere to be seen. Yoongi gets up when he sees the three of you; Kiko gravitates right to his side.

“No disappearing,” Jin tells him sternly, the first time you’ve ever seen anyone boss Yoongi around. “You’re socializing tonight. You promised.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Yoongi grumbles, wrapping one arm around Kiko’s shoulders. “I promised a few hours. The clock’s ticking.”

Jin ignores him completely, telling you girls to come back to the kitchen and get some food. You’re starting to feel like your family should have skipped the campus meal plan and just sent Seokjin some money instead.

You all put a movie on while you’re eating dinner, but no one’s really watching - instead you all chat and joke around. Jungkook comes down from the second floor about halfway down and disappears into the kitchen to get his own helping, and then he joins you all in the living room. You keep looking out the back windows, where you can see the snow clearly thanks to the streetlight. It’s still coming down heavily, and it seems like the wind is picking up, too.

[9:12 PM] You: where are you?

[9:14 PM] Taehyung: my parents

[9:16 PM] Taehyung: its like an hour west

[9:17 PM] Taehyung: i would have stayed if i knew you were coming over ☹️

You’re disappointed, too. This is twice in a row you’ve come to Jin’s hoping to hang out with Taehyung and had that plan dashed.

[9:20 PM] You: i wont lie, i kind of feel like i’m here for no reason now lol

[9:22 PM] Taehyung: chat up jimin, he’s single

[9:23 PM] Taehyung: great ass, too

[9:25 PM] You: whats with u and ppls asses???

[9:27 PM] Taehyung: i like what i like 🤷

You put your phone away for a while as a board game gets set up. Bridget hands you a steaming mug with a lemon slice and a cinnamon stick in it.

“It’s got whiskey,” she tells you when you look at her questioningly. “But it’s really good.”

She turns out to be right, and as you all gather around the coffee table to play, damn is the vibe just perfect - hot mug between your hands, lamps low throughout the room, your friends’ laughter skittering around your edges, the snow falling so fast outside you can barely keep up with it.

Only one thing missing, really.

Later, when you’re on your third hot toddy, laying sideways across Jin’s living room rug, the storm really picks up. The wind tantrums and howls to the point that the windows rattle with each angry gust, and when you look out the window at the streetlight all you can really see is white.

“You girls probably shouldn’t try walking back,” Yoongi says, eyeing the window.

“Gee, who could have ever seen that coming?” you mutter, flopping to your back.

Everyone’s a little drunk, sleepy, lolling around the couches and the floor. The tv continues to play a film, entirely ignored.

Jungkook walks to the window and peers outside. “I haven’t seen it snow like this since -.”

Jimin jumps in, pointing a finger at him. “That’s exactly what I was just thinking.”

“Since what?” asks Bridget absently, from where she hangs upside down off the front of the couch.

“We were in a wreck back in February, it was snowing just like this,” Jimin explains.

“Tae was driving,” Jungkook adds. “He got the worst of it, but we’re both still doing physical therapy.”

It goes eerily quiet. You get the crawling, guilty feeling that you just found out something Taehyung would rather you not know.

“Would he mind you telling me?” you ask, nervous.

“I’m telling you my business, not his,” Jungkook shrugs.

“We don’t have to keep talking about it,” Jimin says, sending you a look that feels approving. “But yeah… I’m glad we’re all inside, safe and sound.”

“Well with that spectacular mood-killer,” Yoongi says, rising, “Kiko and I are heading down to work on a track.”

“Sure,” Jimin deadpans.

You jump in before it can turn into bickering. “The last one was so good, I really liked it.”

Yoongi looks surprised. “You heard the track?”

You look at Kiko, unsure if you had just gotten her in trouble - maybe she wasn’t supposed to send it. “Uh, yeah? The Sirens demo? I thought it was amazing.”

“Me too,” Bridget sings, still upside down, and possibly a lot drunker than you.

“Cool,” he says, shifting from foot to foot. “Well, when we wrap up this one, let me know what you think.”

They disappear down the basement stairs, Kiko giving you and Bridget a saucy wave as she goes.

“What’s with you and Tae, anyway?” Jimin asks, launching directly into the previous conversation. “He won’t tell us anything.”

“Oh,” you say, surprised. “Um? Let me think how to put this… enough is ‘going on’ that my answer is - nothing yet?”

“But you think it will,” Jungkook clarifies.

“If things continue how they’ve been going? Then I guess?” You feel your face heat up at the attention and interrogation and you’re relieved when the conversation moves along and the topic changes.

[12:04 AM] You: we need to have a team meeting re: consistent messaging

[12:05 AM] You: getting a lot of questions… don’t know what the official response should be

[12:08 AM] Taehyung: official response should be fuck off and mind your business Jeon Jungkook

[12:10 AM] You: and Park Jimin

[12:11 AM] Taehyung: and park jimin

[12:14 AM] Taehyung: you staying at the house tonight?

[12:16 AM] You: yeeeeeeeep. Which couch is comfier? 🤔

[12:17 AM] Taehyung: omg no. the couches are gross, do not do that to urself

[12:19 AM] You: if you tell me to try jimin again i swear i’ll -

[12:20 AM] Taehyung: 🤡🤡🤡

[12:24 AM] Taehyung: was gonna suggest my room? if thats not too weird?

You look at this text for a while, thinking. Would you rather sleep in a bed than a beer-soaked frathouse couch? Yes. But Taehyung’s bed? It feels… intimate. It’s making you feel shy, and he’s not even here.

[12:28 AM] You: u sure about that? what if i go through your stuff?? 🙃

[12:30 AM] Taehyung: ……..

[12:31 AM] You: lol i’ll behave. but srsly, you’d be ok with that?

[12:33 AM] Taehyung: yep np - text me when u get ready for bed 🙂

You sent him back a thumbs up and key back into the conversation happening around you. The guys seem to be very busy ribbing Jin about his love life.

“I don’t care, man,” Jungkook is saying on a laugh. “Until you speak to her, it doesn’t count.”

“It counts!” Jin protests. “We see each other every day and she always smiles at me -.”

“Dear god, listen to yourself,” Jimin says in mock horror. “The delusion, I swear.”

“Jin’s in love with a girl that comes to his job every day,” Bridget updates you. “He knows her coffee order.”

“She orders the same thing every time,” Jin shouts, ears going bright red. “You make a specific macchiato thirty-six times, you remember it!”

“What about you guys?” you ask, eyeing Jungkook and Jimin.

“You mean am I in love with someone I’ve never spoken to?” Jimin sasses.

“We speak,” Seokjin mutters under his breath.

Jungkook flops backwards and begins answering you while looking at the ceiling. “I’m not trying to fall in love with someone right now,” he says. “There’s time for that later. I want to have fun for now.”

“Being with the right person is fun,” you point out.

“And who tries to fall in love?” Bridget adds. “It’s not something you schedule. It just happens. You’ve heard all the songs - we’re powerless to fight it.”

“Not B with the ‘MYG featuring Kiko’ lyric!” you shout, rolling over to point at her in appreciation. She grins at you across the room.

Jin’s the first to head up to bed, and surprisingly, Jungkook is next. You get up to follow, telling Bridget and Jimin goodnight.

“Jungkook, uh,” you say, as you climb the stairs behind him, “can you show me which room is Taehyung’s? He said I could sleep there. I can show you the text if you want.”

Jungkook snorts at you. “I don’t need proof,” he says. “Here, it’s the middle one. Bathroom’s on the right.”

“Thanks,” you say, as Jungkook heads further down the hall and enters the room at the end. You stop in the bathroom to brush your teeth, and then head across the hall to Taehyung’s closed bedroom door. You stand outside, frozen, unable to make yourself lift your hand to open it.

Don’t be stupid, you tell yourself. He’s not even here.

You push open the door and shut it behind you, navigating the dark room by cellphone light. You find a bedside lamp and click it on. The room is fairly small - smaller than the triple that you share in the dorm building - and holds a bed, a chest of drawers, a wingback chair shoved in the corner with a tall pile of clean, folded laundry on its seat, and a glass desk with a simple rolling black chair pushed up to it. The furniture seems oddly mismatched - the bedframe and the chest are plywood, old and inexpensive looking, typical student choices. But the wingback chair and the glass desk strike you as different - they’re kind of fancy, they speak to a touch of class you hadn’t seen in Taehyung yet.

You text him - “I’m in your room 🙃” and immediately run your hands through your hair, preparing for the incoming -

Your phone lights up with a facetime call.

“How’s my room?” he asks in lieu of hello.

“Cleaner than I expected,” you admit, looking around. You sit on the end of his bed, the window behind you clearly displaying the heavily waving branches of a tree outside, being battered by the storm. “Except for the pile of laundry.”

“How dare you slander Laundry Mountain,” he says seriously, and you laugh.

“I’m really sorry I’m not there,” he says then, voice quiet, as if he’s not home alone and doesn’t want to be overheard. He’s lounging in a white t-shirt, absently messing with his hair.

“Me too, but don’t feel bad about it. There’ll be other nights.”

“I don’t know,” he says, “there’s something special about being holed up inside together during a storm. It’s romantic.”

You raise an eyebrow. “Are you romancing me?”

He frowns, leaning closer to the camera. “Have I not been clear about that? I’ve been romancing you since that party.”

“If your interesting spider facts are your idea of romancing, it’s not going to go so great,” you tell him ruefully.

He laughs, rubbing a hand over his tired face. “Okay, I started after that. Anyway, did you bring stuff for staying over?”

You reach over to his nightstand, where you’ve carefully set down your toothbrush. You wave it at him cheerfully.

“Do you want something clean to sleep in?” he asks. “I’ve got basketball shorts and t-shirts in the drawers. Second drawer has tshirts, shorts are in the one under them.”

“Are you sure?” you ask again.

“Why not?” he challenges. “Are you going to ruin them?”

You giggle. “Guess not,” you say, and take the phone with you over to the chest of drawers. You open the third drawer and pull out a pair of blue and black shorts, the material cool against your fingers. You take a plain white t-shirt and go back over to the bed.

“I’m putting you down while I change,” you tell him.

He sighs dramatically. “If you insist.”

“I insist, Kim Taehyung,” you say sassily, and toss the phone on the bed so he can watch his own ceiling as you get changed. Then you pull down the comforter and slide under the top sheet, reaching to pick the phone back up as you settle in.

“I’m back,” you tell him, and he just looks at you silently for a minute, until you can’t take the silence and you ask, “What?”

“It’s intensely weird,” he tells you, “looking at you lay in my bed. In my clothes.”

“You can’t even see the shorts,” you point out.

“Doesn’t matter,” he shakes his head. “I know they’re there.”

“Define weird,” you request.

“Can’t,” he tells you. “It’s ineffable.”

“Wow,” you say. “Vocab.”

He shrugs. “I’m more than just a pretty face,” he deadpans.

You laugh out loud. “Try,” you say again. “You can’t tell me it’s weird, I’ll be anxious. Good weird? Bad weird? Should I go back to the gross couch?”

He shakes his head quickly. “No, it’s definitely good. Like… it’s honestly hot, but I’m upset about it?” He laughs. “It makes me feel like you should be right next to me, I should be able to reach out and touch you.” His voice goes low, the same way it sounded before he’d kissed you at the trail, and he asks, “Is it bad that I want that?”

You breathe deeply, turning to lay on your side, holding the phone so you stay in view. His pillows and blankets smell like him.

“No,” you say quietly after a minute, lowering your gaze, feeling weirdly vulnerable. “I want that, too.”

You’re both quiet for a minute, just breathing and looking at each other, and then you ask, “How’s the storm there?”

He turns to look behind him, where there must be a window. “We aren’t supposed to get as much as campus is,” he tells you. “But it’s snowing pretty hard.”

The snow makes you think of something.

“Hey, Taehyung?” you say, a little unsure. He looks back at you, giving you his full attention. “The guys were talking tonight… about the last snowstorm we had.”

You watch his face change as he understands what you’re telling him. You’ve never seen him look like this - he goes from soft and sleepy to absolutely grim, maybe even a little angry.

“I’m sorry,” you say quickly. “I don’t want to make you upset. It’s just, I didn’t want to put you in a position where I know something about your life that you didn’t know I knew. If that makes sense.”

He sighs, looking away from the phone. There’s a defeated slump to his shoulders that reminds you of the party when he’d hurt his ankle on the stairs. That moment suddenly makes a lot more sense. “It does,” he says, finally. “Did Jungkook tell you I ruined his life?”

This throws you completely. “What? No? Nothing even close to that? All he mentioned was that you both still do PT.”

He grimaces. “Yeah, we both got our legs a little fucked up. He was sitting behind me, that’s the side that got hit.”

“I’m sorry that happened to you,” you whisper.

“Thanks,” he says, still looking so serious. You’re both quiet for a minute.

“So,” you say finally, “Jin and the coffee shop girl, huh?”

“I’d rather talk about Yoongi and your roommate,” Taehyung admits, perking back up. “Is she there too?”

You chuckle. “They’re downstairs ‘working on a track’.”

You lapse into sleepy silence again. Taehyung yawns, stretching.

“Your bed’s really comfortable,” you murmur, eyes heavy.

“Yes,” he says seriously, “it can be a very magical place.”

You’re so surprised that you laugh out loud, trying to muffle the sound with his comforter. “You’re really in a mood tonight,” you accuse.

“Can you blame me?” he asks. “Look at the view I have.”

You roll your eyes, but you feel yourself blushing.

“Should I let you go to sleep?” he asks quietly, after you’re quiet again for a few minutes.

“I guess so,” you say. “I really wish you were snowed in with us, Taehyung.”

His voice is so gentle as he tells you, “There’ll be other storms. Sleep well, okay?”

Saturday, November 24th

A crash wakes you - you sit up in bed, grabbing for your phone on instinct, no idea where the fuck you are. It comes back to you by degrees - it’s Taehyung’s bed, Taehyung’s room, at the boys’ house. You click on your phone to check the time - it’s five in the morning. You click on the bedside lamp and rub your face, then pull your messy bedhead into a low ponytail. You shuffle over to Taehyung’s chest of drawers and hunt for a hoodie. When you find one, bright yellow, you pull it on and head across the hall to the bathroom, the real reason you got out of the bed at all.

Once you’re up, though, you decide to investigate the source of the crash. You make your way down the stairs. The kitchen light is on, so you head that way.

Jimin is there, and he looks at you sheepishly. “Sorry,” he says. “I dropped the toaster.”

“What are you doing up already?” you ask him blearily.

He chuckles. “I’m still up, actually.”

“Go to bed,” you chastise, dropping heavily into one of the kitchen chairs. After a minute you ask, “Do you guys have a coffee pot?”

Jimin looks around the kitchen quickly, as if he can’t remember. “We did,” he muses. “I think we broke it.”

You glance at the clock again. Even if you were on campus - which you’re not, and getting there is going to be interesting since the roads are currently snow-covered and it’s still snowing - it’s Saturday and the coffee shop doesn’t open until eight-thirty.

“You could have some of Taehyung’s tea?” Jimin suggests. “It’s still caffeine.”

“Beggars can’t be choosers,” you agree.

As he starts heating up the water for you - which is sweet - he tells you, “Normally we have a strict rule about touching someone else’s food without permission, but you’re a girl so you’re automatically granted some leeway. Plus you’re a girl that he likes, so you basically get to do whatever you want.”

Your stomach flips when he says this, as if it’s been a huge secret that Taehyung likes you.

As you rise to make the tea how you like it, Jimin watches you thoughtfully.

“What?” you finally ask, self-conscious.

“Sorry,” he says, shaking out of the daze. “I was just thinking. About Taehyung.”

“Oh?” you say, moving to sit down with your steaming mug. Jimin’s tone is light, but you get the feeling that he’s really serious right now.

“We’ve been best friends for a really long time,” he tells you.

“Is this a ‘don’t hurt my best friend’ talk?” you tease.

“No,” he tells you, leaning forward intently. “Honestly, I think you’ll be really good for him. I just wanted to make sure you know that with Taehyung… I know he comes off really playful and all that. It’s just - he’s - I’ve seen him go through… a lot of stuff. There’s more to him than meets the eye, is all. I wanted to make sure you knew that.”

You remember Taehyung telling you over waffles that being aware of your own darkness helped you recognize it in others.

“I think that’s true for most people,” you say evenly. “Isn’t finding that out just a normal part of getting close to someone?”

Jimin nods, considering this. “I guess so,” he says, “if you’re actually invested in getting to know them fully. Not everyone is.”

“You mean, other girls he’s dated?” you say, feeling very clever.

He gives you an I’m not falling for that look. “Anyway,” he says pointedly, “I’m going to bed now. Help yourself to food if you get hungry.”

“Okay,” you say quietly, waving as he leaves. You take a picture of your mug and text Taehyung - “apparently I owe you some fancy tea?” - and then turn to watch the snow come down as the sky gets lighter and lighter with each passing minute.

–

When the snow stops, midmorning, all four guys head outside with shovels to start digging out the cars. You, Bridget, and Kiko watch from the front window as the boys work. About halfway through, the city plow comes up the street, clearing the road.

You make Taehyung’s bed and leave the clothes he’d let you borrow folded up on the end of it. Except for the hoodie. You take the hoodie.

Yoongi drives the three of you back to campus, you and Bridget giggling and poking each other in the backseat.

Your next text from Taehyung comes in later, after you’ve all had dinner and returned to the room.

[8:59 PM] Taehyung: i seem to be missing something 🤔

You put the hood up and snap a cute selfie, squeezing your eyes shut and cheesing, and send it to him.

[9:02 PM] Taehyung: 😤

[9:04 PM] You: guess you’ll have to come get it since u miss it so much???

[9:05 PM] Taehyung: i’m tempted tbh

[9:06 PM] Taehyung: but not really for the hoodie…

Wednesday, November 28th

Taehyung facetimes you each day that you don’t see him for tutoring - usually after dinner, and usually under the guise of a Chekhov question.

On Wednesday morning, you meet at the coffee shop instead of the library.

“You really need to get off academic probation,” you tell him. “Hanging out with you while I’m on the clock is starting to make me feel weird.”

“But you do such a good job making sure I’m awake,” he pouts adorably.

That night, though, he texts you a screenshot from his school email: glowing praise from Professor Watanabe on his “notable improvement” and a solid B+ on the paper.

“Officially passing!” he sends.

Thank you so much for being here! I appreciate every single like, reply, dm, ask, or reblog - more than you know!

As always, a huge thank you to @kookstempo for being the bestest little pumpkin and for beta-ing! A million wocks for you!

#taehyung x reader #dailydaegu #taehyung fic #taehyung fanfic #s2l #taehyung angst #college au #f2l #bts fanfic #bts fic #fic: what was hidden #taehyung smut #(but not in this chapter for full disclosure)#bts x reader

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endlesstwanted · 1 year

Text

What Have We Become

My entry for the @flashfictionfridayofficial #201 prompt Comedian’s Night and the @domaystic day 17 prompt Marked date in the calendar!

Fandom: Original Work

Rating: General Audiences

Characters: Blue (OC), Richard “Ricky” Jones

Tags: First Person POV, slightly codependency, Secrets, Angst and feels, Non-verbal communication, Domestic Fluff, Ambiguous Ending

Summary: Rick takes Blue out to a comedians’ night the night before their big mission.

Wordcount: 809

Author's note: This is set in one of my MCU-verses, but given that none of their characters appear in this piece, I tagged it as Original Work! Things are being ambiguous and nothing is clearly discussed on purpose (even though the summary gives a clue), so I’m sorry if it’s confusing. I promise it makes sense with the rest of the story, but this was not a scene to spill every detail onto. This piece, unlike the rest of my writing, will not be posted on Ao3.

Thanks for reading, ficlet under the cut!

Ricky has said it was a good idea.

I didn’t want to get out tonight, given what day tomorrow is. And I don’t understand how coming to see random people talk to a bunch of strangers and trying to make them laugh is a good idea, but everyone seems chilled here. Maybe it’s me, who can’t understand their humour, and maybe Ricky is just pretending that this is actually fun so we don’t call it a night yet.

We’ve been here for an hour now, and it’s definitely not fun, at least for me. But well, I know what I am getting when I agree to anything he suggests —as if I had the ability to tell him no.

Ricky has been listening to the speakers and holding my hand. We’ve never done this before, outside our room, but I’m holding his back. It feels nice. Very nice. He’s also been laughing at some of the jokes, chuckling at the rest of them. And looking at me, from time to time, like trying to guess if I’m still here or not.

I’ve mastered the art of being in one place and having my mind in another, which is usually work, and that’s where I am right now. Tomorrow’s date has been marked in my calendar for quite some time, and I have only just told him today. I feel terrible for keeping it away from Ricky, making every second I’ve spent with him since I was assigned this task a waste, by not making the best out of it, but I had orders to follow.

I’m sick of orders and I’m tired of this place.

On top of that, I have just realised we have never done anything like this before tonight, nor in the years we’ve known each other or in the ones in which we have been living together. This is something Ricky has never asked me to do, and it can be his way of dealing with my departure.

This seat is getting uncomfortable and I shift, squeezing Ricky’s hand and bringing it closer on the table. I can feel his eyes on mine, and even if I’m focusing on the speaker’s lips and on trying to make sense out of whatever they are saying, I know by my side there is a better view.

So I turn to look at him, and his eyes tell me everything I need to know. He doesn’t want to go home.

Well, coming back to a bunker turned into a room and a bed we’re going to share for the last time in maybe forever doesn’t sound suitable for anyone, that’s fair. Even though he doesn’t know this last part, I know very well what is happening after tomorrow, what needs to happen if I want to fulfil my mission and finish living in this lie I’ve turned both of our lives into.

The only reason why I’d like to come back home tonight instead of running away is because I’ll be doing it with Ricky, and he’s the one giving some meaning to that name. The moment we close the door, he’s going to wrap his arms around me. Probably will pick me up to take me to bed, and most likely pepper my face with kisses until I feel my head burst from laughing.

We’re going to cuddle in bed later, entangling our fingers like we were made to be mixed with the other, and if I get lucky, he’ll remember some kind of story he’d start to tell me. If he doesn’t, or is not feeling up for it, he’ll be skipping that part and jumping to where he rests his head close to mine and whisper kind words to carry my soul to sleep. Words of freedom, hoping for a better tomorrow, and a future in which we’ll be in charge of our own fate. Words of hope, close to daydreaming of a life we could be living only if we were different people.

I’ll pretend to believe them; I’ll snuggle closer to him. But he’ll look at me like anyone’s looked at me before, like he does every night, and I’ll let it pass, praying that he keeps looking at me like that forever, simply because I cannot say the words I want to say to him. I don’t know what is going to be like to get away from his skin, his magical voice and the warmth of his presence.

And I don’t really want to find out.

So for now, all I have to do is focus on the person speaking into the microphone, and on Ricky’s laugh and his touch on me, and hope for the night to last, or at least let it be one to remember and recall in the worst of days that will be there to come.

#domaystic2023 #original work #angst and feels

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specialagentartemis · 1 year

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A Catalogue of Longfics I Want (Plan?) To Write

Only ideas I think would be multiple chapters and 10k+ words; doesn’t even include oneshots like Sisko Negotiates Space NAGPRA or Picard Goes To An Archaeology Conference or Teen Ratthi Angsts About Going To College or The Crew Of The Hermes Gets Murdered And Their Brains Scooped Out.

Ranked from 1 🌱 = this is just daydreams and vibes, to 5 🌱🌱🌱🌱🌱 = I have a 10-page outline with every plot beat and thematic parallel written out.

A * means that I’ve actually posted several chapters to AO3 already

Wolf 359

The Last Days of the Lovelace Administration 🌱🌱🌱🌱🌱 Lovelace tells Minkowski what happened on her mission. Fully canon compliantly tragic. Everyone dies. Frame narrative. Lovelace-centric.

*To Stand Together Against Fate (Lambert Week fic) 🌱🌱🌱🌱🌱 An AU that spun off Zach Valenti’s “Lambert Week” streams. Lovelace and Lambert fight fate and REFUSE to let anyone die. The timeline gets slippy and things start getting weird. Lovelace won’t let a little thing like temporal causality hurt her crew though.

*Change the Rules 🌱🌱🌱🌱🌱 Minkowski, Eiffel, and Hilbert do Box 953.

The Tiamat Horror 🌱🌱🌱 Zhang’s mission.

—

The Murderbot Diaries

Anthropology fic 🌱🌱🌱 Murderbot and Thiago go to a Corporation Rim mine where the miners are trying to unionize and strike, to do linguistic anthropology. They get more than they bargained for. Featuring SecUnit OCs, original filk, worker solidarity, and speculative linguistics.

*Home Again 🌱🌱🌱 The PresAux crew are home after their whole survey ordeal… but changed by the experience. Not the same people they were, and they don’t fit quite the same way. Augh I want to finish this but I’m kinda stuck on some of the chapters

Volescu backstory fic 🌱🌱🌱🌱 What if he was a political refugee and went through Some Shit. Would that be fucked up or what.

Pin-Lee backstory fic 🌱🌱🌱 Her CCC-esque service year before college.

Overse backstory fic 🌱🌱🌱🌱 Moved from a CR station to Preservation as a child. This causes some feelings.

Pin-Lee Exit Strategy POV 🌱🌱🌱🌱 As de facto leader here she was having a fucking Time.

Consuela Makeba’s story 🌱🌱🌱 THE EPIC OF HOW PRESERVATION WAS FOUNDED 300 YEARS AGO!!

The murder mystery one I started in an AUpril snip and went actually this is a banger concept 🌱 No idea where to go from here but it was a cool idea

—

Greek Epics And Mythology

Polites perspective on the Odyssey 🌱🌱 He gets to survive actually because honestly. Give one of Odysseus’s men a break. Something about how the men who weren’t kings and demigods and great remembered heroes still went Thru This Shit too. Epic poem in dactylic hexameter because I hate myself apparently

Odysseus adopts Cassandra 🌱🌱🌱 based on a tumblr post hell if I can find again. Clever use of Odysseus calling himself “Nobody”. Means he found a way to hear her prophecies and believe them, so she cuts a deal—she gets him home in 3 months rather than 10 years on the promise that if she does so he’ll adopt her as a legitimate daughter and princess of Ithaca. Very meta. In the format of a classic Sophoclean or Euripidean play.

Brithawon goes with Nestor to the Trojan War, has a bad time 🌱 I just think it would be fun

—

Star Trek

Kira is upset about Cardassian archaeologists on Bajor 🌱🌱 Sooooo much potential here

Sarina Douglas becomes an advocate for genetically engineered people’s rights 🌱 Here too!!!

—

Other

‘Emergence’ (Noel/Leon in 10th century Chaco Canyon) 🌱🌱🌱 An alternate ending to the Time Trap! series. No I never read the real ending that’s irrelevant. Noel and Leon fuck in this one. Also there is political intrigue regarding a Chaco elite marriage

The Tiamat Horror… 2! Primordial Deep version! (Sirena Halcyon and the 10 years she spent trapped in an underwater ocean research station) 🌱🌱🌱🌱 God!!! What was she DOING for ten years stuck in the place where her one surviving colleague killed all the rest of them! Featuring cuddling, horrifying transformations, and cannibalism.

#Artemis rambles #fanfiction

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greenvillainredemption · 2 years

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@lunamadrigal ‘s fun encanto question game! :D

1. If you lived in Encanto, what job would you have?

I’d like to be a teacher if they had a school there, that’d be really fun.

2. What ice cream flavors do you think would exist in Encanto if ice cream were plausible?

Lots of fruits probably, I don’t know what kind of fruit is native to Colombia but if you do then yeah those ones. Chocolate probably too.

3. For writers: Something you wish readers knew?

Hm nothing really big I can think of except I am just some person pls be nice to me.

4. For readers: Something you wish writers knew?

If you have an idea that you think is tropey or overdone, just do it. I am slurping them all up.

5. Any Encanto pet peeves? Can be canon or fic related.

It is a little annoying that the ending of the movie is rushed, but I get it yknow it’d be hard to fit in a lot of realistic development in the end there. That’s what fanfic is for babeyyyy!

As for fic related, I gotta say I’m not a huge fan of the Bruno kidnapping Mirabel trope. I do kinda get the appeal, especially back when it was a new idea, but mainly I just think those Brunos are too angry and/or confident for my taste. I actually kinda want to tackle the idea myself just to see what I’d do with it.

6. Who's your favorite OC and who do they belong to?

Hands down Reme from Candlelight by @clichejoe ! I think it is the only fic I’ve read that centers on an OC, but she is just everything. I’d die for her.

7. And your favorite OC design?

I’m in love with @hot-tortilla-fish ‘s Bruno gf OC. I can’t remember her name oof I’m so sorry, but her design is just so beautiful and she looks so good with Bruno. We love weird rat man x weird bug lady. So cute.

8. Smut in fics or keeping it Gen?

Gen hands down. I don’t mind some smut if it comes up (Candlelight again is an excellent example of top tier smut), But I don’t go out specifically looking for it if that makes sense. I’m mostly just here for the wholesome platonic family vibes. And drama and angst and pain of course.

9. Do you have a favorite underrated Encanto fic writer?

Not sure exactly what counts as underrated, but a sort of newer encanto writer I love is @icarusinthesand !

10. Pretend you’re Bruno for a second and you just stubbed your toe GO!

*screams* *fucking dies* *super dramatic about it* *getting many giggles and eye-rolls from the kids*

11. A song that would be on Camilo’s playlist?

So the fandom is in big agreement that he’s a theater kid, so definitely some musicals. I can see him absolutely getting in the Villain Song mood, I mean he was having the absolute time of his life playing spooky Bruno.

12. You’ve gotta kick one canon character out of Encanto. Sorry.

Aw man I’d never want to do that even if some of the villagers are a little rude. But I gotta go with donkey guy. Leave Luisa alone sir. He can take the donkeys with him he’ll be fine.

13. Tag an Encanto artist that is fueling the fandom cause they deserve a hug.

@glitternightingale @mebssann @dazeddoodles @sketchnwhatevr 💕

#encanto #my words #man I have so many fic ideas when will I get to them all....

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serenereigns · 2 years

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Damaged

Part 6

Pairing: TXT X Male OC/Reader

Genre: Angst

Word Count: 1.2k

Not Spellchecked

Warnings: Poor home life, Crying, Negative Emotions

Jae’s POV

I finish putting my stuff in my backpack and pick up my stuffed Pikachu. Although old and torn, I’ve had it for as long as I can remember. I take one more look around my room. Memories flashing through my mind. Not many good ones. Mostly bad, but it’s the few good ones that make it hard to leave.

I know that my father isn’t the best, but who am I to judge. I don’t know what he’s been through, I know that he wasn’t always bad. “Don’t cry.” I touch my face and feel wetness, I didn’t even notice. I sigh, while making eye contact with Yeonjun he goes to wipe away my tears. I flinch, “I’m sorry, it’s just a lot of conflicting emotions. I know I shouldn’t stay, but I feel so guilty. All he has is me.” I look down at my hands and start to fiddle with my fingers.

Taehyun frowns slightly, with his eyebrows furrowing. “I don’t know what you’re feeling or what you’re going through inside, so I won’t say that I do. But I will say this, it is a lot and it is hard. Dealing with your emotions isn’t easy, but we’re here for you. That includes making sure that you’re safe. Even if that means getting you out of a bad environment.” I sigh defeated, nodding my head.

“Well then, all I can do is be there for you guys as well. We met not even a week ago and yet you’ve shown me the most love and care I’ve had in a while.” They all look at each other with sadness in their eyes and slight pouts. “Well not exactly, we m-“ Beomgyu’s sentence cut short when he’s interrupted by an anxious Yeonjun. “It looks like you have all of your things. Are you ready to go? I’m sure you don’t want to be here when your dad comes home.” I look between Beomgyu and the others having hushed whispers before turning back to Yeonjun. “Yeah, let’s get out of here.” I lean down to pick up my backpack leading the way out.

…

Kai’s POV

Soobin unlocks the door to our dorm and let’s everyone in. “Welcome to your new home.” I say almost jumping out of my socks. “You’ll be my roommate since I’m the only one without one. I can show you all of my plushies, we can play games and we can-“

“Slow down Kai, let him settle in first.” Yeonjun chuckles and turns to Jae before he continues. “As you can see, all of our shoes go here.” He points at a shoe rack by the door. “This is the living room, the kitchen is over there, and all of the rooms are down that hallway.” He points once again in the direction where everything was. “The bathroom is at the end of the hall as well. We’ll let Kai show you to your room. He’ll be kind enough to let you relax a bit. Right Kai?” Beomgyu looks at me with a questioning look on his face. I sigh and nod. Turning towards the direction of our rooms, I start walking and Jae follows behind me.

Then I begin, “Our room is here, Soobin and Beomgyu hyung’s room is right beside ours. Then across the hall is Yeonjun and Taehyun hyung’s room. Beside theirs is our office area. That’s where we practice writing lyrics, learn English, Japanese and all that fun stuff.”

“That’s super cool, your dorm is super nice and clean.” Jae looks at me with stars in his eyes. I try my best not to combust. “This is your bed, we prepared everything in hopes that you’d say yes. When we came to get our blankets and such we reorganized my room. Even manager hyung helped. He asked some of the staff to get a bed and some other basics while we went back to the hospital. I hope it’s suitable for now. We didn’t know what you liked so we just went with black and white.” I finish my spiel almost out of breath.

I clasp my hands together and turn to look at Jae, “Are you okay? You’re a little quiet.” I hesitantly ask. “Yes, I’m more then okay.” He smiles at me and after struggling a bit, he gives me a hug. “Hugging is kinda hard for me, but I don’t know how else to show my thanks.” I chuckle. “No need to thank us, we just want you to be safe and happy.”

I turn and go towards the door as Jae starts to settle in. “Wait, don’t go. I’m tired but I’m scared. Will you stay with me?” He asks me. I stifle a giggle and nod my head. I beam, “Let’s lay in my bed, my plushies will protect you. Molang is my number one soldier!” Jae goes to grab one but hesitates, “You can hold him, in fact I’ll let you have him. You kinda look like Molang. Should I call you bunny from now on?” His eyes grow wide. “N-no, Jae is fine.”

“I see, does being called bunny make you shy? I guess we’ll have to stick with cuddle bug!” He shakes his head again, lowering it to hide his evident blush.

Jae’s POV

“I’m so sorry to ruin this precious moment, but you guys have been napping for about two hours and we have some shopping to do.” I feel a poke on the side of my cheek. I force my eyes open with a bit of grumbling. All I see is a blob of brown. Kai groans, “Beomgyu Hyung, move back. You’re too close.” Ah, that makes sense. Beomgyu seems to have no regard for personal space. “Shopping, what shopping?” What he said finally registers.

“Yes shopping! We noticed that you don’t have many things. No offense or anything, but we talked with manager hyung and he said we could go. Just for some basics.” I frown, I don’t need anything, I’ve made do with what I’ve had so far.

“But I don’t need anything, I’ve done fine and I’ll continue to do so. You guys have already done so much for me. I’ll feel bad if you do any more.” Beomgyu slightly frowns, “Trust me, we wouldn’t offer if we didn’t want to. As for payment, you can go to our practices and cheer for us. Sometimes it gets a little boring with just us. We get in our heads too much and beat ourselves up over not being perfect all the time. We need someone to help us break out of that.” I feel my face brighten, I’ve always wanted to dance. The only time I get to is during lunch. Sometimes I hide on the roof to avoid Mark. That’s the only time I really feel free.

Beomgyu noticed my silence, “Maybe you could even join us. We wouldn’t mind another member.” I gasp. “I’m not that good, I can still cheer you on though!” I start going to the doorway to get my shoes. Beomgyu and Kai following behind me doing the same.

“Nonsense, we’ll let Bang pdnim decide.” I slightly nod my head while putting on my shoes. “Let him decide what?” Yeonjun questions. “Letting Jae join us for practice and possibly for debut.” Yeonjun face lights up slightly shocked. “Will that even be allowed?” “Of course, I joined late and with little experience. So why couldn’t Jae?” Beomgyu retorts. “It could work, and since I’ll be the leader, I’ll ask manager hyung about it first and then we’ll see. In the mean time, let’s go shopping!”

We all nod collectively at Soobin and head out for a hopefully fun day of shopping.

#beomgyu #hueningkai #kpop #soobin #taehyun txt #yeonjun #kpopidol #male reader #tomorrow x together #txt #male oc #txt x reader #txt fluff #txt angst #txt post

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spacebobastories · 2 months

Text

Promise

You know, I never thought in a million years I would be writing Nanami angst but here we are :D 😭 I hate the fact that he is gone but he’s at peace. Anyway, this is an OC insert. So enjoy…or don’t.

Pairings: Nanami Kento X OC (Louis)

Anime: JJK

Warnings: Angst

Word count: 1,221

I made a promise

To distance myself

Took a flight, through aurora skies

Honestly, I didn't think about

How we didn't say goodbye

Just see you very soon

It was quiet in the cockpit as Louis looked out the window. His head leaning against the coolness of the glass as he blankly stared down at the water below. They flew through some clouds and the view of the water was lost for a few seconds. Louis’ siblings were also quiet as they sat in different parts of the jet. Charlotte was curled up on the seat with her head on Azrael’s lap. He was slowly moving his fingers through her hair as she let out a shuddering sigh. Alvara laid in the back of the jet, throwing a baseball in the air and catching it. Everyone was exhausted, mentally and physically. It wouldn’t be over, now that curses are loose all over Japan, their work wouldn’t be over. The siblings were tired, more so Charlotte as her healing energy was almost depleted and she was on the verge of collapsing anytime she moved. They were all Sorcerers, they didn’t realize how hard the battle at Shibuya would be. How many people they would lose.

They all lost friends, some even felt like family with how close they were. Louis didn’t know how he could function without Nanami. He grew up with the man, he was close with him during high school and after it. They became more than friends, lovers even. Oh how Nanami talked about going to Malaysia a couple of times and Louis was on board with it.

Flashback

Louis walked beside Nanami with his arms behind his head. They were dropping by Jujutsu High to deliver some paperwork to Gojo(Louis and Nanami knew the man wouldn’t read it) about some curses in the area.

“Why couldn’t we just email it to him?” Louis asked with an annoyed groan. His golden eyes looked over to his lover who let out a soft sigh. The blonde reached up to fix his glasses before looking over at Louis who grinned at him.

“Because, Lou, you and I both know Gojo won’t read his emails. We can at least deliver this to him physically so he can actually look at it.” Nanami explained for the 5th time today and Louis let out a scoff, rolling his eyes and pouting lightly.

“He won’t read it. I bet you he’ll just grab it and toss it on the desk.” The redhead explained and chuckled as Nanami just shook his head.

“You might be right…but we still have to do it. It’s important.”

“Mm, sure.”

It was quiet as they walked and Louis was looking around the campus when a nudge at his side got his attention and he looked back towards Nanami who had a small smile. “Why don’t we go take a vacation soon? I’m thinking about Malaysia. I hear the beaches are nice there.”

Louis blinked at Nanami for a few seconds before grinning widely and laughed gleefully as he almost tackled the man. Nanami grunted but wrapped his arms around his lover. “Sounds like fun! Why don’t we get a little beach house there too? We could spend our summers there. Maybe bring the kids there too. They might want a vacation from being Sorcerers”

Nanami smiled and nodded his head “sounds like a plan.” Louis chuckled and leaned up to give the man a kiss, happily running his fingers through his hair.

Flashback end

Louis swallowed thickly as he reached a shaky hand to cover his eyes. He couldn’t even be there for his lover. He was doing another mission when the Shibuya incident happened. Deep down he knew Nanami had pulled some strings to get him that mission. With what was happening with Geto and everyone else, there was a lot happening over Japan. So, there were a lot of curses that needed to be dealt with. Louis just wished that he didn’t find out what happened to Nanami over a phone call. By Yuji of all people.

Nanami was like a father to the boy and to have him die? Yuji didn’t say how the man died, which was a good thing. But he could hear the hurt in his voice. He sounded different. More…toned down. Different from his usually happy self. Being a Sorcerer was not easy. Everyone knew it was a dangerous line of work to go into. Louis knew him or people close to him were going to die. But, he didn’t expect it to happen so soon.

It hurts to be something

It's worse to be nothing with you, mmm

So I didn't call you

For sixteen long days

And I should get a cigarette

For so much restraint

No matter how long I resist temptation

I will always lose

A few weeks passed by and Louis walked along the beach. The sand warm under his feet with the salty breeze moving past his face. He had bought a beach house on a section of private land in Malaysia. It was quiet as he moved along the beach, feeling the water lapping at his feet. The redhead had his phone out, thumb over the call button. He knew it wasn’t healthy to call Nanami. Knowing he was already gone. But hearing the voice mail, hearing Nanami’s voice helped just a little. Not by much. But it soothed the pain, even for a little while.

“This is Nanami Kento. I apologize for not answering the phone. Leave me a message and I’ll call back as soon as I can.”

Louis raised the phone, mouth opening a little as he stared at the phone. He swallowed thickly and let out a small laugh. “Hey, Ken. I…you were right. Malaysia has the best beaches. I bought a little house along the shore and it’s like…it’s the…it’s amazing.” He sniffed as he reached his hand up to wipe the tears that were rolling down his cheeks.

“I wish you were here to see. I miss you…” he took a shuddering breath as he ended the call and crouched down, gritting his teeth as he tried to not sob again.

It hurts to be something

It's worse to be nothing with you

I've done the math

There's no solution

We'll never last

Why can't I let go of this?

It hurt to not have him here. To not hear his voice, to feel his touch. Oh how Nanami would love it here. To finally relax. Why did bad things happen to good people? “Fuck.” Louis whispered as he roughly wiped his eyes, letting out a hiccuping breath as he stood once again. It was going to take time to get over Nanami’s death. To heal from it. Maybe in time he could learn to love again, to let someone else in. Until then, he would keep calling Nanami’s number, talking to him and never getting an answer back.

So I broke my promise

I called you last night

I shouldn't have, I wouldn't have

If it weren't for the sight of a boy

Who looked just like you

Standing out on Melrose Avenue

It hurts to be something

It's worse to be nothing with you, mmm

It hurts to be something

It's worse to be nothing with you

#nanami kento #writing #original character #oc community #oc #oc x canon #OC X Nanami Kento #jjk x oc

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ciaossu-imagines · 5 months

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I understand that fear since it has been a while but since you still write like you used to, in like a kind of talking to the reader way while showing that you clearly know the character and how they think, I’d say your writing is still as great as ever. And yes, as long as you have fun, that’s what’s most important. It’s kind of what we talked about some time ago I think. Thank you so much. Never thought I’d see someone say ‘I look forward to reading it and crying myself’ but thank you. Though fair warning, even before the end, there’s some heavy stuff, with comfort of course, but it’s still there nonetheless. Yeah. You’re definitely not alone. Even in the past when I wrote angst I’d sometimes tear up but because of how painful this bit was for everyone involved and because I love both my OCs and the guys so much, I just couldn’t not. Also, I tend to apologise while writing or rereading certain painful bits. Thank you 😀 I just thought of it because it gives me enough time to reread it at least twice and it also gives me enough time to not look at it for some time.

Yeah. One thing I can say for sure is that she’ll have her dad’s confidence and since she knows what kind of person her dad is, she knows she can do whatever she wants and he’ll be there for her (within reason, of course). Problems at school or the teacher has a problem with how she’s being? Don’t worry, Haruki’s there on her side and loves the thought of having a word with someone (and possibly scaring the crap out of them). Yeah. Exactly. No more death, just fun time in a different way. Also, it would hurt me so much more than what I did in the main story. One of Haruki’s parents dying would crush him and since he’s been through so much, do not want to write that, one of the Bandō’s dying, no way could I do that. And Yata? The love of my life (or one of them) dying? He’d be at peace but god damn, I don’t want to be the one to put that onto paper. And thank you so much for already being a fan 😭 I also already did it with another side couple and published it under my side stories. But I will say that I probably won’t publish these since even though they are about characters that appear in the main story, it’s still mainly for me. Though of course I’m up for sending them to you when I finally get around to writing them since you’re so interested in them already.

And thank you so much. I actually don’t have your email address since you disappeared before we could exchange that kind of contact info. But I do prefer DMs since then everything’s together. And don’t worry about being slow, I’m just happy you’re back and can talk whenever you do.

Thanks so much for understanding! I'm not always the best at wording things and it sounded a bit silly to put it down that way, even if it felt the most authentic way to put it. And I'm glad my writing is still good - I honestly just do write what I think about the character and situation without pulling many punches, though still trying to make it entertaining and appealing for you lovely readers. There's a part of me though that wishes to get back to the in-depth writing, crafting full out stories, though I am sure I will get back to that eventually, with time and practice! I still have HOMRA pieces to finish up, The Ever Young to actually get up, and I was working on a fun self-inserty piece from a fun ask that had once been sent in asking who I'd recruit to a paranormal investigation team so it was me writing that out, like an actual investigation, for shits and giggles, before I gave up my hobbies and likes. But I'm getting it all back and getting happier by the day :) And I legit have had to stop in the past during certain asks or stories to just cry before getting back to writing and I always figured it's because I'm a really emotional person so again, super nice to know I'm not alone. And I really do love that you think to reread not just once, but twice! I next to never reread lately because once I start rereading, I start adding or taking away things and rethinking everything and then the writing never gets completed haha.

And she sounds interesting already! And most definitely Haruki would always be on her side! Honestly, I think even if she did royally mess up, he'd call her on it but like, that's his child and she'll have to live with the consequences, but she'll still know that he loves her and if things get too bad, she'd have his support. And oooh, I hadn't thought of the fact that yeah, to continue, Yata would have to die and I honestly cannot imagine that happening and know how much it would tear you apart to have that happen. Me, I could definitely send him out in a blaze of glory and last minute complete heroism, but I never did have the attachment to him that the rest of the fandom did. Writing Shouhei or Bandou dying? Again, could do but those ones would make me cry and then I'd need to go write countless fluffy or funny or smutty stand alone pieces to make up for it! And I will definitely be up for reading them once you finish writing them! Reading fanfiction is another thing I want to get back to doing, if anyone wants to throw recs my way (along with, going to be a begger here, active ask blogs for my fandoms because like…I would love to read some self-indulgent stuff about my favourite characters without having to write it). It might take me a couple days - I'm taking tomorrow off completely from writing to finish my reread of KHR, since that's what won the poll, and I'll probably take a bit of time one of the other days to wrap up season one of Jujutsu Kaisen, since it was the runner up!

And dm's work for me then! I always appreciate the people who understand and tolerate my slowness at replying on them!

#admin chatter

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rayshippouuchiha · 2 years

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Here, have some longer Naruto series fic rec’s

Author Meeceisme on Ao3 and the series is called “The many lives of Hatake Raiden”

The whole thing starts with the insert of Raiden, dead soldier (at different times, with different premises, different genders even) - many story’s and AU’s and every last one great

Making Lemonade

Author Summary:

Waking up after dying to a whole new life in a brand new body is a little outside his frame of reference. But he’ll do his best to make the best of this weird as hell situation. Worse comes to worse he’ll grab all his favourite people and run the hell away from this mad place.

Featuring: Konoha’s atrocious orphanage system, cynical child soldiers and Kakashi’s guilt complex.

It’s on the darker side, a bit of a mindfuck and no-one comes out of it without a big flashlight on their flaws. Raiden is a bit older then the Naruto-gang and pretty much alone

From Sour Lemons

Author Summary:

He didn’t ask to be here, he sure as shit didn’t ask for these weirdo ninja to be all over his case. If this lanky jerk with the terrible hair insists on being a dad at him, he’s well within his rights to give the guy as much grief as possible. And the Uchiha. But that’s just because they act like cracking a smile will crack their faces off or something.

Raiden is a terrible gremlin of the same age as Naruto (both around 5 at the start) running wild in Konoha, bit of a savy street-kid, excellent OC’s and on the fun side even if there is a bit of angst.

You Don’t Like Lemons?

Author Summary:

Kusagakure has already killed their mothers. He’s not letting this rotten place take his adopted sister too. He’ll find somewhere safe for her. Somewhere Karin can smile and the bite marks on her arms fade away like bad memories.

The Chuunin exams is a great way to enact their escape.

Or would be if Konoha would quit trying to poach them.

Raised in Kusa with Karin, they ennact their plan to not have any village have a say in their lives, when they reach Konoha’s Chunnin exam. Raiden is 6 (and so into dogs that the Inuzuka think he might be a stolen child of their clan). Angsty start, a lot of fun later on. Kid is as always absolutly into seals

Too Bad. We Drinking Lemonade Today

Author Summary:

So I’m just minding my own business, living my best second life and then these schmucks rudely barge in like they own the place. Ninja? I think not. It’s the pirates life for me. What the hell is this chakra nonsense? It is clearly magic, you plebeians. Get the hell outta my life.

This loser ninja is my dad? So? The hell am I even gonna do with a dad?

Pure Crack, Troll Raiden (younger than Naruto by a lot) - a simple fun pleaure to read

Okay. That’s Enough Lemonade Now

Author Summary:

The plan was nebulous at best from the start but…this? This was not part of the plan.

But when a kunoichi gets knocked down, she picks herself up, dusts herself off and hits back twice as hard and ten times as mean.

If she sometimes looks into her child’s beautiful little face and bawls her eyes out, well.

Raiden’s not going to tell anyone. Babies are good like that.

Fun, Drama, Plotting. Competent Nara mama, what-are-emotions-and-how-does-one-handle-them-Kakashi dad. Looks at different spectrums of sexuality, neurodivergence, the power of hugs and talking, how awesome scary Kunoichi mums can be, death to danzo and a domestic Kakashi

I’m weirdly proud of this submit’s formating and all the links i put in ^^ hope others also have hours of reading pleasure, like I did. The fanarts the author did are quality as well

#RayRambles #Naruto #Fic Rec #Oh yeah this is marvelous format work here #absolutely lovely

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spacecowboyhotch · 2 years

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In Bloom🌙

summary: tender moments in the early morning and afternoon of Wednesday.

pairing: Zira (fem!black!oc) x Aaron Hotchner, Jillian Daly x Maggie Daly

warnings: angst, fluff, kissing, some dirty thoughts

an: this was fun to write, all my floral class knowledge i got from my irl bestie who’s a florist 🥺 song inspo is cassiopeia by anju

word count: 1.5k

series masterlist | playlist

There’s only one place that Zira lets herself be completely honest and it’s the blank canvas of a document. She hasn’t even gotten ready yet or gone to get coffee. As soon as she wakes up, the idea sits fresh in her head. She needs to get it out, and process what she’s feeling for this man who’s been in her life for no more than 48 hours.

i could list the things your mouth against mine beats out

not because it’s easy, not because i lack favorites

but because your kiss was that sweet, that savory, that sour, it was everything.

warm summer days and cozy winter nights

like the first and last chapter in a book and everything in between

it was being filled with all things great and emptied of everything evil.

it was better than everything i’ve ever held dear

better than beholding the moon in the night sky

than fingers flying over keys

than the tip of a cow’s nose

than the rich darkness of a chocolate bar

i have to find something better, i’m desperate to.

something bigger and brighter and warmer

i don’t know if i can

but i have to

She leans away from the computer, needing to separate herself from what she’s just written. That’s when she realizes she’s crying, angrily wiping tears from her face. She shouldn’t do this. She shouldn’t get ready with him in mind, or flirt while serving him breakfast, or make plans with him. If anything she should cut him off. But even now, 48 hours in, she can’t. She needs to drink up every drop of what he’ll give her in these 12 days.

Just company. Just company.

When she heads downstairs it’s a little later than usual, and she’s kind of a mess according to her standards, in a pair of worn jeans and a band-tee. Entering the kitchen she stops in her tracks at the sight of Aaron chatting with Jillian and Maggie over coffee and trays of fruit.

“There’s our sweet peach.” Jillian smiles, lifting her mug up.

Her brain is malfunctioning given the circumstances of the morning and so all that comes out of her is, “Aaron’s here.”

“Yeah for the next 12 days.” Jillian tilts her head in confusion.

Aaron looks a little wounded, can’t deny that his ego is bruised from the look on Zira’s face. It isn’t disappointment per se, and it’s not like her face fell but she doesn’t exactly look like she’s happy to see him. He can take a hint though he’s confused, he thought last night went well.

“I just finished this cup, so I’ll excuse myself. Thank you for the coffee Jill. Maggie.” He sets his mug in the sink, heads towards the door. He kisses Zira on the cheek, murmurs something about seeing her later before gliding through the door.

“What was he doing in here?”

Jillian snorts. “You need to worry less about that and more about apologizing. You looked at him with not a shred of happiness.”

“Well I was surprised, he’s a guest, we never have guests back here.”

“He’s your guy, and he was up early, so Mags invited him for coffee.”

“He’s not my guy.”

“So the kiss,”

“Oh god, he’s told you about that?”

“Zigs, you’ve already admitted that you like him, why not lean into it. He’s here for 12 more days, how much of a commitment could it be?” Maggie asks gently.

She knows that Maggie is right, it shouldn’t be a big commitment but he’s in her heart. He’s made it into the foyer and if this continues the way it does, he’ll make it into the deepest and darkest parts of her. All of this is true yet her feet start moving, and she’s out the door, following him. She sees a glimpse of him walking out of the dining room out onto the patio and makes a beeline for him. She takes a seat next to him on the same swing they were on not 24 hours ago. The air’s a little heavier, both of them more deflated.

“I’m sorry.”

“There’s nothing you need to apologize to me about.”

“Aaron.”

“Zira.”

She has to choose her words wisely. She realizes that even though her feelings about him are conflicted she doesn’t want to hurt him. “It’s not that I wasn’t happy to see you, I’ve told you I don’t do this, and I was just surprised.”

“Surprised.” He repeats, almost questioning.

“Surprised, that’s all. I’m happy to see you. I am. And I’ll be even happier if you’re coming camping with me tonight.”

“You still want to do that?”

“Well if you don’t want to, I guess I could ask someone else. That guy who skis in Colorado might,”

He leans forward, pressing his lips to hers. Zira’s hand immediately raises to push through his hair and then cups his cheek. He feels so good against her and she wishes that she could crawl into his lap and grind down onto him. She remembers that she’s at work, and that other guests can see this so she keeps it clean, and pulls away even when she doesn’t want to.

Her mouth lifts up into a smirk, and the look in her eyes makes Aaron’s cheeks heat. “I’ll take that as a yes.”

“I’d say your deducing skills are at a solid 5 out of 10 since that was a blatant confirmation.” He presses his lips together in an attempt to hide his own smirk but she sees his lips twitch.

“And I say your rating skills suck. Look, I’ve gotta go help out and then I have my flower class at noon but after that I’m free.”

“I’ll be waiting.”

“Yeah, you will be.” She says cheekily, planting a quick kiss on his lips before popping up and heading back for the kitchen.

Breakfast is stolen glances and flirty smiles, as Zira and other employees make their way around the dining room, serving and bussing tables.

—

If he sits on his balcony he has a perfect view of the small garden growing in the back. More importantly he has a perfect view of Zira who’s looking confident and sweet as she teaches a flower arrangement class. She’s changed into a white dress with puffed sleeves, half of her hair pinned back to keep it out of her face, looking almost fairy-like.

He’s trying to read a book and failing because her voice is captivating. She’s so knowledgeable, listing the types of flowers and all of the materials that everyone will need to build an arrangement. He didn’t know there was so much that goes into floral design. There’s the known necessities of a vase, and the flowers and greenery. But then there’s the chicken wire for a base, the shears to clip and cut, and flower tape to keep things in place.

She makes sure to stress the fact that there’s a front and a back to the arrangement, and that there’s a focal point. It’s the most important part of the arrangement, design wise at least, and it’s how to construct it. Everything lies in bringing a person’s eyes to that point. If Aaron’s being honest with himself all he can think about is how she’s become that for him.

She’s walking around her participants, murmuring encouragement or gently correcting when she glances up at where he’s sitting, and catches his eye. She winks at him with a sly grin and he can’t stop the smile that spreads across his face if he wanted to.

If he wasn’t sitting, he wouldn’t be surprised if his knees buckle. He’s totally smitten with her. As the class continues he thinks about how she makes him feel, landing on light. And when he comes to that conclusion he tries to find a time where he’s felt like this before but he can’t. The feeling of seeing her and being with her is completely new which is something he didn’t think was possible. Things with Haley, they had been good, he can distinctly remember that but had they been like this? He’s experienced a lot and was resigned to living a known life, all until his eyes laid on her.

He won’t let this feeling scare him, not only for himself but for her. He senses her hesitancy, identifies it in her eyes every time they’re together. If there’s a time to throw caution to the wind it’s now, here with her. He’ll live in the moment and give her his all. This feels like an opportunity to start healing. It feels like a place where he can just be, and feel, and…love? To let go.

“Yoo-hoo, Aaron, anybody in there?” Her voice is a guide back to reality.

He clears his throat and stands up to look over the railing at her. She’s got something behind her back, looking up at him with that same sly grin. “Sorry, I was lost in thought.”

“I made this for you, I hope you like blue.” In her hands is a floral arrangement of flowers, all different shades of blue in a white vase.

She’s so great at making him smile, he’s pretty sure that his cheekbones will hurt by the time he leaves. “Blue’s actually my favorite.”

“Then I’ll bring it up to you and then we can grab lunch, lounge a bit, and pack up?”

“I’d like that.”

tagging: @laurensprentiss, @ssahotchie, @sadgirlml, @angelfxllcm, @jaspxr, @hotchs-bitch, @chelseyjoyce, @rousethemouse, @iamc, @dadbodhotch11, @hotcrosshotch, @fightingdragonswithreid, @ashhotchner

#original black fem character x aaron hotchner #original character x aaron hotchner #original fem character x aaron hotchner #oc x aaron hotchner #fem oc x aaron hotchner #criminal minds x oc #original black female character #original character #moon river series #aaron hotchner fanfic #aaron hotchner fics #criminal minds fics #criminal minds fanfic #queuetip

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erule · 3 years

Text

The frat party | t.h.

Title: The frat party

Pairing: Frat boy!Tom Holland x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 1823

Warnings: frat boy Tom, angst, nakedness (nothing sexual though, no smut in this chapter), mention of sex, implied smut, cliffhanger at the end, jealous Tom, language, OC Oliver, violence (one punch), blood, plot twists.

Summary: Tom and the reader met at a frat party, but a year later they broke up because of some reason. Now, rumor has it that the reader is dating one of Tom’s friends and he gets jealous.

A/N: Hello hello, I’m back! Have you seen Tom’s recent pics in Monaco?? He looked amazing! Anyway, I don’t know why, but I just had to write a fic with frat boy!Tom, so enjoy!

If you wanna be tagged in my Tom Holland fics, just let me know in my ask box! You can also find me on AO3 and Wattpad. Feedback is always appreciated by a writer!

Main Masterlist

Tom Holland Masterlist

Peter Parker Masterlist

Chapter 1

Break up with my ex girlfriend

Frat parties. Am I right? Worst part of college life. A lot of people drink to forget about their grades and how their lives went wrong, while someone’s just hoping to have some fun with them (if you know what I mean). For the first year, I hated them with passion, but it was before I met him. At a frat party. Oh, the irony! And then, frat parties were the only chance I had to actually talk to him. It didn’t take us long enough to start dating. I think that adults tell you fairy tales to make you grow up with a hope, the hope to find your real happy ending, your true love. Well, I wasn’t used to believe in them, but the year I spent with Tom… that was close to the definition of happy ending. The problem with happy endings? They don’t tell you what happens after them. And that’s because they’re a nightmare.

“Tell me that now or you’re not gonna find me in this bed tomorrow”, he says and there’s a part of me that wants to die right here and right now. I shake my head. I don’t want to do that. Not because I don’t feel anything for him, but I’m scared that this will complicate things between us and it’s the last thing I want. “Are you serious, Y/N? You really think that saying something like that during sex doesn’t count? Calling someone on the phone means something, even if you’re drunk as Hell. So tell me what you really feel about me right now or I swear, I’m out of this room. I’m out of this kind of weird relationship that’s going on between us for years,” Tom says and the veins on his arms draw a beautiful map on his body, in which the moles are cities and his eyes are volcanoes. They’re burning, unlike my skin, that is freezing because I’m not wearing anything at the moment. Except for my shame, perhaps. My insecurities, that never leave me. Even in front of Tom.

“You don’t mean that,” I try to say, my mouth dry. But he’s insanely angry. In another situation, it would be hot.

“I do, Y/N,” he replies. I swallow. His expression softens, like he’s in pain. He comes closer to me, brushing my cheeks with his hands. My eyes are full of tears. His words feel like a prayer on my skin. “Please, tell me”.

And even if I don’t wanna do that, my hands are tied. Even if that’s a lie. I remain in silence. One second after that, he’s gone. Tom always keeps his promises, after all.

2 months before

Harrison sat down with a strange look on his face. It only meant one thing for Tom: trouble. He sighed, throwing away the third cigarette of the day. Jacob raised an eyebrow, trying to get rid of the stench of smoke with one hand.

“I thought you wanted to quit smoking,” Jacob said.

“Relax, I only smoke before finals now,” Tom said. “What’s up, mate? Come on, talk”.

Harrison raised a corner of his lips in a smirk.

“Rumor has it, that Oliver’s got a girlfriend,” he said.

“No way!” Jacob exclaimed.

“Oh, fuck me,” Tom said, laying on the grass with his hands behind his neck, glancing at a couple of girls who were passing by.

“I haven’t said the best part yet, though,” Harrison continued. Jacob urged him to speak further. “He’s gonna throw a party for his birthday and he’ll introduce her to his friends. But since we’re his friends, I was wondering why I haven’t told us anything about this gal in weeks. So I played Sherlock Holmes for a couple of hours and I found out that… we actually know this girl,” he said.

“I bet she’s someone of the campus,” Tom joked, as if it was obvious.

“I bet she’s someone’s ex girlfriend,” Jacob replied.

Harrison remained quiet, but he was smiling.

“You gotta be kidding me,” Tom said, astonished, while sitting on the grass again.

“I won!” Jacob yelled.

“Who’s she? I hooked up with…”

“Ex girlfriend, Tom. It’s not some random girl you hooked up with. She’s someone you remember very well,” Harrison said.

“So we’re talking about me, uh? Well, let’s see… is it Janine? We lasted two weeks, I wouldn’t be mad about her,” he shrugged. Harrison swallowed.

“It’s someone you would be mad about,” Jacob guessed. “And there’s just one person that you would be mad about”.

Tom’s eyes widened at the realization.

“He’s fucking dead”.

Two days after that conversation, here they were: the three of them were laying with their backs on the wall like they were sustaining it from falling down. Tom had threatened Oliver with a Dare to explain, mate?, but his answer was just an I’m sorry Tom, but she’s just your ex. I don’t have to ask for your permission. Or does this mean that you’re still not over her? So, since Tom values too much his pride, he said that he was over her and that Oliver was right, he didn’t have to ask for his permission. Oliver apologized for not telling him that before and then walked away, leaving Tom to smoke the whole pack of cigarettes. Tom was watching Oliver talking with Elizabeth, one of your friends, when he saw you and Zendaya arrive at the party. In his opinion, you were stunning. You immediately caught his gaze. You just never failed to amaze him, even after a year. His heart ached at the view, but it ached even more when you greeted Oliver. You gave him a kiss on his cheek, clenching your hand in a fist. It seemed like you were uncomfortable. So, he came up with a plan to save you.

“Wait for me here,” he said to his friends, then he walked fast to reach you. “Hey mate, happy birthday!” Tom said to Oliver, who hugged him.

“Thanks, Tom. I think that you already know Y/N, Lizzie and Z,” he said and you smiled along with your friends, even if you looked more surprised than happy.

“Of course, I do,” Tom said, looking directly at you. You looked down. “Could I please talk to Y/N? We haven’t been in touch for quite some time and I’d like to catch up with her,” he asked.

“Sure!” Oliver said, while Zendaya seemed looking at you with a concerned expression. You winked at her.

Tom made you move away from Oliver by brushing your back, walking to the next exit. He lowered his voice in order to talk with you only, speaking to your hear: “You look ravishing, darling”.

He noticed that you closed your eyes for a very long second, but you didn’t say a word about that.

“Are you here to show that you still own me or something?”

“I don’t own you, darling. You’re absolutely free to do anything you like,” he said, lighting a cigarette outside the building.

“Z said you wanted to quit smoking,” you said, furrowing your eyebrows.

“I only smoke before finals”.

“Finals were yesterday,” you replied.

“Are we here to talk about me or you? I noticed that you were uncomfortable with Oliver, but I thought that you were his girlfriend. Wouldn’t it be weird?”

You smirked.

“Oh, now I get it. You’re jealous”.

“Nah, If I’d be jealous, you would know, trust me,” Tom said, with a playful tone.

“What would you do?” You asked, curiousity eating you alive. You wanted to know so bad if he still had feelings for you.

“Don’t play with fire, darling. You’re gonna burn your pretty hands, otherwise,” he replied, running a finger over his lip. Shivers ran through your spine, but you hoped that Tom didn’t notice it.

“Don’t try to seduce me, Holland. You’re not gonna win this time,” you said, chuckling. “And for the record, we’re not dating. He’s just insistent,” you explained.

Tom looked inside and saw Oliver staring at the two of you. An idea came up into his mind and he couldn’t quite get rid of it. It was smart, but also terrifying. It was very dangerous, yet he had to try.

“We could be in a fake relationship. It could fool everyone,” he proposed.

You turned to look at him, astonished.

“Even after what happened?”

Tom’s eyes were locked with yours, but his facial muscles didn’t move at all. If he still was hurt by the reason that made you two break up, he didn’t show it to you.

“He’s coming here,” he said instead, glancing at Oliver.

“Tom, this is insane,” you kept going. “You said you couldn’t forgive me after…”

It happened all too fast. All the lights went out at the same time. Tom's lips were on yours in an instant. Everything was on fire, every inch of your body. Every cell your flash was made of exploded like a dying supernova. A moment later, someone snatched him from your hands, leaving you in the cold.

Oliver hit him. Tom laughed, nervously, but then he grabbed the collar of Oliver’s shirt and slammed him against the wall, angrily. You pounced on Tom, trying to pull him away from Oliver. At first, Tom looked at you confused, thinking that you just wanted to keep Oliver safe from him, but your eyes told him another story: you prevented him to be kicked out from the campus.

“I told you, you’d know,” he said, while wiping a trickle of blood from his mouth, pretending to be the tough guy he wasn’t.

“Guys, I think we should leave,” Jacob said, while Harrison was taking Tom away from Oliver by his arm.

“I thought we were friends, Tom,” Oliver said, an inch of hurting in his voice tone.

“That was before you came after the only thing I care about,” he said harshly. And then, he left with Harrison and Jacob.

That night, while Tom was cleaning himself of blood in the bathroom, Jacob was staring at him worried, while standing with one arm against the door jamb.

“You never told me what happened, you know, with Y/N last year. Haz doesn’t want to tell me, he thinks it’s up to you. You said that you were over her, but I don’t think you are, since what you did tonight,” he said. Tom kept wiping away the blood from his shirt, ignoring Jacob’s words. “Why have you broken up with her, Tom? It seems pretty obvious that you’re still in love with her”.

Tom gulped, while looking at himself in the mirror. He had tried to bury all of his memories deep down, but it seemed that now the demons wanted to come back and play with him once again. Maybe it had finally come the time to confront them.

When he spoke, his voice was low and hoarse: “Because she cheated on me”.

Read chapter 2 here!

#tom holland x reader #tom holland x y/n #tom holland x you #tom holland smut #frat boy tom holland fanfiction #frat boy tom holland #fratboy!tom holland #frat boy tom holland x reader #tom holland fanfiction #tom holland fanfic #tom holland ff #tom holland imagine #tom holland headcanon #tom holland hc #erule's masterlist #peter parker x reader #tom holland

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naughtyneganjdm · 3 years

Text

Just Not My Type

Summary: Negan and Y/N are best friends after he saved her when the Apocalypse first started. In their group, Negan is charmed by another woman and it leaves Y/N jealous because she is head over heels in love with Negan. Attempting to get his attention on her, she asks him to help her with something in hopes to get him to realize that he may like her more than he thought.

Characters: Negan, the reader (OC), Simon, Dwight, etc.

Warnings: Swearing, smut, angst, arguing, Negan being an asshole, etc.

Notes: Pre-warning, Negan is a bit of an asshole and is kind of cruel in this one. This was a request given to me. I'm not sure if people just like me writing asshole Negan or what, but I hope the person who asked for this is happy with it! I wrote this rather quickly. I hope it's at least okay!

“I don’t get it,” Negan grumbled beside Y/N while they walked through the wholesale store together. The rest of the group went off in separate areas of the store to look for supplies and they were supposed to be doing the same. There was a frustrated expression over Negan’s face and she felt a sense of disappointment. When the world fell to shit, Y/N pretty much gave up. It got to the point where she had no one in her life. A few months ago, she had found herself cornered by a group of savages and felt like it was the end of the world as she knew it. Somehow, Negan was passing by while in search of people and heard her getting attacked. He saved her. Just in time too. Since then she hadn’t left Negan’s side. They managed to find Dwight’s group together while lingering and looking for others. They had become somewhat of best friends since they found each other. The only problem was Y/N was head over heels in love with Negan. Unfortunately, Negan didn’t feel the same way. Instead, he seemed to be heavily enamored with Dwight’s wife Sherry. “What does she even see in Dwight? That scruffy looking motherfucker.”

“He’s the leader Negan,” she reminded him with a sigh knowing that his complaining was coming from his jealousy. “A lot of girls are into that kind of thing.”

“Yeah, but look at him and look at me,” Negan reasoned, throwing his hands up in the air while he clutched to the shotgun that was in his hands. “I’m fucking hot. He’s a scrawny little shit.”

“I don’t think she can help who she was married to before all this happened Negan. You’re right though, you’re better. All around,” Y/N agreed with him. She meant it. Obviously. She was in complete awe of the guy. One day she was hoping that he would just open his eyes and realize she was standing right there next to him for him to love. Many times in the past Negan had cracked jokes about her being hot so she thought maybe at some point she would have a chance with him. The longer she waited, the less likely it actually seemed. Maybe she wasn’t giving him the signs that she was interested. “Hey, I wanted to talk to you about something and since you’re a guy, I figured maybe you would have some advice.”

“Yeah?” Negan grunted, his head lowering enough to look between the shelves while he watched Dwight and Sherry together. “What’s on your mind?”

“Well, you see…there is this guy that I like,” Y/N explained with a sigh, clutching her rifle in her fingers. Her cheeks flushed over with red when Negan finally turned his head to look at her. The way his thick eyebrows bounced up showed that he was interested in what she was saying. “I’ve liked him for a while, but no matter how much I try I just can’t seem to get his attention.”

“Why not? You’re hot. Just tell him you’re interested,” Negan suggested and she looked away from him. Clearly that wasn’t in the playing cards and she would never have the guts to do something like that. “Who is it? Is it Simon?”

“Negan,” her face scrunched up when he suggested Simon who was someone they had just picked up in the group with Dwight. An amused breath fell from her throat and Negan threw his hands up in the air. “It’s not Simon. I’m not going to tell you who it is, but…I don’t think I could tell him that I’m interested in him. He has his eye on someone else.”

“Trust me, if you tell a guy now of all times that you are interested in him, he’s going to jump at the opportunity to get his dick sucked, I promise you that,” Negan grumbled and he could see that her face flushed over making him laugh. “What’s with the blushing? Sucking a dick isn’t such a big deal.”

“Well, there is one thing…” she took in a long shallow breath making Negan’s eyebrow arch up. God, she felt pathetic admitting this to him, but she couldn’t help it. “I kind of haven’t had sex before.”

“Come on,” Negan chuckled, taking a long look at her and he shook his head. The way he laughed made her embarrassed and he nudged her with his arm. The snort he released made her feel even worse about telling him. “How old are you?”

“Okay, forget it,” she rolled her eyes and went to move forward, but Negan quickly followed her not far behind. “Just pretend I didn’t say anything.”

“I’m not making fun of you, but you’re hot and most people lose their virginities too fucking young now so I just kind of figured you’re fucking with me,” Negan insisted, biting at his bottom lip as he spoke. Y/N still didn’t seem interested in talking to him and he let out a dramatic sound. “Okay, come on. You’ve done oral though, right?”

“Something tells me that I don’t want to be talking to you about this,” she replied feeling her throat tightening while Negan looked her over with amusement. “Seriously, I’m not the seductive type that can make a man want me.”

“Well that’s bullshit because you’re fucking beautiful and any man would be lucky to have you,” Negan corrected her reaching for something from the shelves. A grunt fell from his throat as he tossed it aside and let out a loud sigh. God, if only he actually meant that. “Just tell him you’re a virgin. He’ll want you immediately.”

“Virgins aren’t a lot of people’s things Negan,” she reminded him and Negan’s nose wrinkled when she said that.

“That’s bullshit. Every man loves the idea of taking someone’s innocence and purity away. They all like that shit,” Negan reached up to brush his fingers through his dark hair with his free hand. “You might not be the best fuck he’s ever had, but the idea of popping your cherry will turn him on and he’ll want to fuck you immediately.”

“I don’t really want to be a virgin when I go to him,” she whispered and Negan’s eyebrows tensed together as he looked her over with his big, hazel eyes. “I guess I kind of want to know what I’m doing with him by the time I tell him that I like him.”

“And how do you plan on losing that virginity of yours sweetheart? Slim pickings you know,” Negan snorted, the bridge of his nose wrinkling when he spoke. “Unless, I’m sure we can find you a good cucumber around here where you can…”

“Oh shut up,” she begged hearing his laughter filling the air at her reaction. Hitting him firmly in the chest, she walked off toward the back of the store and he quickly followed after her. Entering the area where they had more shelves in the back for storage, she surveyed through the items and sighed. “We should get people back here and have them get some of this. This is good stuff.”

“I’m not making fun of you. Okay? It’s just the way I talk,” Negan reached for her after setting his shotgun down and aside. “No one is going to turn you away for being a virgin. I promise you that and like I said, if you went to the guy and told him how you felt I guarantee that no matter who he had his eye on, he would change his mind quickly because you’re a catch Y/N. Trust me.”

“I wish that were true,” she felt him reaching up to cup her face and so badly she wished that Negan would have wanted her. That he would have wanted to be with her. “Since you’re my best friend you should do me the favor of helping me with the virginity problem.”

“Oh, you don’t want me to do that,” Negan snorted, stepping back and away from her. What started off as a joke actually ended up hurting her feeling unintentionally when Negan denied her. “First of all, we’re friends. That makes that shit weird. Second, I have a huge cock. I’m the last person you want to have sex with as a virgin.”

“I don’t think it’s that big,” she laughed and Negan let out a frustrated sound.

“When have you seen my penis?” Negan scoffed and she looked down toward his groin making him turn away from her when she did. “You have no idea how big my dick is. I’ve been a gentleman and I’ve never pulled it out in front of you.”

“I’m just saying, I can’t picture it being so big to the point that it would destroy me forever,” she mocked what he had said and Negan frowned after she said that. “I just think if I lose my virginity I’d like to lose it to someone I feel comfortable with. Someone that I know and trust.”

“You trust me and you feel comfortable with me?” Negan repeated what she said and she nodded. Licking over his bottom lip, he looked around the area in the back that they were at realizing that they were still alone. “How do you want to lose your virginity?”

“How should someone lose their virginity?” she inquired, her eyebrow arching up in curiosity and Negan laughed.

“On a mattress, in a nice comfortable set of sheets with the perfect mood and setting,” Negan stammered, waving his hand around in the air while he spoke. “Unfortunately since we’re on the road and there are no mattresses for the most part, that’s kind of fucking impossible. No matter how you lose it, it’s never going to be what you deserve. The dead walking is going to make sure of that.”

“In another world maybe,” she responded with a sigh as Negan reached for her rifle and set it aside. “What are you doing?”

“We’ll see,” Negan pulled her into a corner beyond a shelf and he began unbuckling his pants making her eyes get wide. “Get on your knees.”

“What?” she laughed, tilting her head to the side while she looked him over.

“You’ve never given a blowjob before and I could use one, so I’ll help you learn that,” Negan answered, reaching for her hands, leading them toward his pants and she let out a nervous sound. “I haven’t had a release for a very long time. So if you want to learn something to get his attention, I can help you learn that.”

“Shouldn’t we kiss or something? Get the mood started?” she suggested and Negan grinned when she said it. Negan’s jaw flexed and she placed her hands over the center of his broad chest.

“The idea of getting my dick sucked already has the mood started,” Negan answered with a grunt, reaching for her palm to lead her to cup him in her hand through the denim of his jeans. “When you go to him, palm over his body with a sense of confidence. Caress over this area and rub. Wait until you feel him start to get hard and then squeeze at the length of his cock. How many men have you kissed?”

“A few?” her throat was dry while she brushed the length of her palm over Negan’s body. The way his eyes closed made her heart skip a beat before the pace of it began to pick up. A deep, raspy moan escaped Negan’s throat when she felt his body starting to harden against her touch.

“That doesn’t sound very convincing,” Negan dragged his tongue over his bottom lip and he reached out to draw his hand out over the side of her neck. His fingers hooked around the back of her neck to draw her in closer to him. The sound of her nervous breaths filled the air and Negan smirked. “Don’t be nervous. You trust me, remember?”

Before she could respond, Negan’s lips collided with hers causing her to fall in closer to him. The way he kissed her took her breath away and she eagerly kissed him back. With Negan stroking his thumb over her jawline, she found herself falling deeper into the kiss. A warmth pooled at her core and she was swooning, bad. Negan had no idea that he was the man she was in love with. This to her was like a dream come true. A breath hitched in her throat allowing a quick flick of Negan’s tongue over hers and she returned the gesture hearing him hum when she did it.

“You’ve got something going with the kissing,” he breathed against her lips, his eyes hooked on hers when he pulled back to stare at her. Leaning in, he dragged his tongue over her bottom lip hearing her whimper when he did it. Growling as Y/N squeezed at his body, Negan looked down between them and panted. “Take it out.”

“You sure?” she confirmed with him and Negan snorted.

“I’m not the innocent one here,” Negan responded with a grunt while she started to pull apart his belt. Negan leaned his left arm against the wall while watching her fingers fumbling to get the button apart. As her fingers dragged down the zipper, he closed his eyes tightly when her mouth pressed in over his jaw. The soft kisses she pressed over his jaw and toward his neck made him groan out loud. When she kissed at his earlobe and bit softly at it, it caused a shudder to fill his body. Keeping his right hand at the base of her throat, Negan stroked his thumb over the center of it and could see her lowering her head as she got his pants apart. Reaching down, she grabbed the waistband of his boxer briefs and pulled down to allow his semi-erect cock to spring free into the cool air. Immediately she reached out to wrap her palm around the shaft of his body, caressing up and down slowly. “You can be a bit rough with it. You won’t break it…”

Negan licked his lips lowering his hand that was around her neck to adjust the grip she had on his body while urging her to pump her hand over his body in a different way. Teasing his flesh over his body, Y/N could feel her body attempting to tremble, but she was doing her best to keep it together. Negan’s eyes were on her like a hawk while she touched him. When his cock was completely solid in her palm, she licked her lips and watched Negan’s nod down toward his body.

Lowering down to her knees, she felt a rush of panic filling her body. If she was awful at this, that would be what Negan remembered her for. This was very brave of her to do in the first place considering Negan was the man she was swooning over.

“It’s big, right?” Negan affirmed with her and she looked up at him with expressive eyebrows.

“With the way you were talking I was expecting a foot long,” she teased, a smile sneaking in over the corner of her lips and Negan rolled his eyes.

“That’s impossible and if it is possible, no one wants that,” Negan grunted reaching down to squeeze at the thick base of his cock. “I can say with confidence that I know I have a thick, above average sized uncut cock and I know for a fact that in your virgin pussy…it would still hurt.”

“I figure if you were good with it, it wouldn’t hurt much…right?” she confirmed watching his eyebrows arch up when she said that. Sitting up straighter on her knees, she went to lean forward, but Negan stopped her and reached out to slide his thumb in over her bottom lip.

“Take this into your mouth first,” Negan ordered, watching her lips part for him and he pushed his thumb between her lips. Softly, she sucked at his thumb before twisting her tongue around it making him hum in approval. “Good girl. Make sure to vary with your tongue, your mouth and hand. If you use all three, you’ll have the guy of your dreams buckling at the knees.”

“Yes sir,” she purred making Negan release a muted moan when she said it like she did. There was no doubt she was uncomfortable. She was on the spot and as Negan’s fingers sank into her hair, she knew it was now or never. Keeping a firm hold on his body, she took the tip of his cock into her mouth and heard him sigh heavily. It caused him to drop his head back and lick his lips. Dragging her tongue over the head of his cock felt so dirty, but she wanted to make an impression. Licking at his body, in long drawn out motions caused his grip on her hair to get tighter.

“Hollow your cheeks and drag your tongue against my cock when you pull back,” Negan grunted pushing her down his length only to allow her to pull her head back. Leading the motion a few times, Negan could tell that she understood what he wanted and attempted to repeat what he had showed her. “Very good sweetheart.”

Taking time to do what he asked of her, she could feel his hips pumping up toward her throat and she tried to focus on not gagging. Occasionally it would happen and she couldn’t stop it from being that way. When she took him as far in her throat as she could, Negan braced himself against the wall and whimpered.

“Fuck me,” he breathed out, his eyes hooking with hers and he smiled. “You’re really going all in, aren’t you?”

“I just want to make you happy,” she pulled her lips from his body with a wet sound and jerked her palm over his body that was covered in her own saliva. Kissing at the base of his cock, she kept her eyes hooked on his and shrugged. “I want to give you everything you want.”

There was something different in Negan’s face as he seemed to think about something. Going back to try to pleasure him, she gasped when she felt him tugging her back up to her feet. Licking her lips, she gave him a shocked expression and bit at her bottom lip, “Did I do something wrong?”

Quickly moving her, Negan turned her toward the shelves and reached for her hands to force them onto one of them. Shoving her pants down her legs, Negan stood behind her and pumped his hand over his length. Keeping his hand on her neck, he could hear her panicked breaths and he stepped forward. Dragging the tip of his cock through her wet folds, he heard her cry out as he did it.

“You’re fucking soaked,” Negan released himself and palmed in over her mound. She was shaking and Negan felt a chill run down his spine. Teasing his fingers over the length of her sex was his way of testing her. Circling his fingertips over her entrance, he waited until her breathing was uneven and then pressed his middle finger inside of her. The sound she made caused his cock to twitch with excitement. With how tight she was around his fingers, Negan found himself completely in awe with her. “You really are a virgin, huh?”

She didn’t have to say anything. It was obvious. Nodding, she tried to keep herself steady on her legs while Negan thrust his finger inside of her. When he added another finger, she found the sensation completely foreign and to be honest kind of uncomfortable. Clutching to the shelves, she bit down extremely hard on her bottom lip. Probably too hard.

When Negan’s fingers pulled from her body, it felt strange. The sound of Negan spitting was heard behind her and she looked over her shoulder to see Negan caressing over his length. Before she could respond, Negan was grabbing a hold of her hips, positioning her where he wanted her. Pressing his cock to her entrance, he kept an exceedingly tight grasp with his left hand on her hip while his right kept a hold of his erection.

Thrusting forward, the sound of her cry filled the air when he entered her and it was like music to his ears. The moan he let out the moment her tight body parted for him was loud enough for others to hear if they were near. Reaching around her, she pressed her hand in over Negan’s hips knowing that she wanted this, but this wasn’t exactly how she pictured losing her virginity to Negan. Taking a moment, Negan seemed to respect that she needed some time to get used to what he had put inside of her before he started to thrust his body into her time and time again.

“Fuck sweetheart,” Negan growled, lowering in closer to her so he could rest his jaw over her shoulder. Lifting his hands, he hooked his fingers with hers and heard the smacks of their skin filtering into the air while he fucked her from behind. Nuzzling his nose against the back of her neck, Negan grunted and found himself loving the firm grip her body had around his body. “You may just have the tightest pussy I’ve ever had.”

“Negan,” she cried out his name knowing that they weren’t being quiet. If someone were to come back there, it would be obvious what they were doing. The fullness she had with his cock inside of her was foreign and she was doing her best to enjoy it. It was more so the idea of who she was with that was drawing her to try and enjoy things. When he pressed his full length into her, she involuntarily reached back to push into his hip to try to get him back. “Too much.”

“It’s not too much. We just have to get you to relax,” Negan breathed against her ear, nipping at her earlobe when he reached around with his right hand to caress his fingers over her clitoris making her whine when he did it. Taking his time to work his caress over her sensitive bundle of her nerves, Negan loved the sounds he was drawing from her. When her cries became more of those of pleasure, he started rolling his hips again. “There we go.”

Within time things started feeling better as Negan angled his hips differently. She was doing her best to stay up on her legs while Negan continued to rock his hips into hers. The deep plunges his body made inside of her made her bite at her bottom lip and her soft cries filled the air. Using that as encouragement, Negan quickened the caress of his fingertips over her body and thrust his hips at the same pace.

“Let it happen,” Negan whispered when he could sense that she was holding back. “Cum for daddy.”

“Negan,” she shuddered, lowering her head and Negan grasped tightly to her body to keep her steady while he continued his motions through her orgasm. The room was spinning around her, her thighs convulsing. It didn’t stop Negan’s movements and his mouth peppered kisses over her neck. When his sharp winces followed, she could feel the pulsating of his body inside of her. It was a strange feeling but when he began to empty himself into her, she found herself panicked.

Every muscle in Negan’s body was flexing behind her. He was pressed up against her back until he finished with his orgasm. Taking a moment to stand there for them, Negan chuckled and bit firmly at the side of her neck. Looking down, Negan very slowly pulled his softening cock from her body. The dripping sounds of their fluids hitting the floor were heard and he let out a proud breath.

“Hold onto the shelves so you don’t fall,” Negan suggested as he began to pull his pants back up over his body. Pushing his cock back into his boxer briefs, Negan squeezed over his body and could see her resting her head forward against the shelves. She was still shaking and the sounds she was making showed that she was trying to catch her breath. Helping her pull her pants back up her body, Negan led her toward one of the pallets to get her to sit down and she winced. “You’re going to hurt for a while, but welcome to the world of normal. You don’t have to worry about being a virgin anymore.”

Reaching out, he urged her eyes to his and gave an arrogant bob of his head, “No one will ever be the first man to have you or to give you your first orgasm. It will always be me. I hope you always think of me with your future lovers.”

When Negan lowered in closer to her, she reached up to draw her hand over the side of his face to pull her to him. A pleased sound escaped Negan’s lips as she kissed him in a long drawn out motion, “You’re welcome…”

“Negan,” she swallowed down, pushing her forehead to his when she thought about what they did. “Should you have pulled out?”

“Nah, unfortunately I can’t have kids,” Negan informed her with a wince as he pulled his belt back together. There was a sense of sadness in her eyes as Negan shrugged his shoulders. “I tried for fucking ever before all of this to have children with Lucille. It never worked. I’m like a hundred percent certain I’m sterile.”

“Oh,” she didn’t know how to respond and Negan shrugged his shoulders. It didn’t seem to bother him that much and she bit down on her bottom lip. “Was that okay?”

“Oh yeah,” Negan reached out to squeeze at her shoulder in a supportive grasp. “I’m going to go get someone to tell them about the supplies back here. I’ll be right back.”

Nodding, Y/N lowered her head when Negan left and she swallowed down hard. Part of her was happy that Negan was her first, but the other part of her wasn’t exactly happy with how it happened. It also didn’t seem like it meant much to Negan where as it meant everything to her. Their group came in the back to get the supplies and a few of them took notice of how she seemed to be different while she sat there. Negan explained that she got ‘injured’. Other than that they didn’t really expand upon what happened. It certainly was hard to move around after what happened, so the walk back to the campsite wasn’t exactly the best.

At nightfall, Y/N had taken her sleeping bag down by the water to sit by the fire. She wanted some time to think about things alone. By asking Negan to take her virginity, she felt like she was being obvious in telling him that he was the one that she liked. Unfortunately, it didn’t really resonate with Negan that’s where she was headed with things. Pulling her legs up closer to her chest, she heard the sound of someone moving in beside her and she huffed when she saw it was Negan with his sleeping bag underneath his arm.

“Why are you taking off from the rest of the group?” Negan pondered, sitting down with Y/N after he laid out his sleeping bag beside her. The group was very far off in the distance nowhere near the water and his eyes surveyed her over carefully. “You know you shouldn’t be alone. One of the dead could come out of nowhere and gnaw on you.”

“I’m not sure that would really bother anyone,” she chuckled and Negan frowned as he leaned in to rest his head on her shoulder.

“It would bother me for sure. You’re my best friend here,” Negan reminded her and let out a hesitant breath. “In fact, I feel like you’re the only person that can stand me right now.”

“Well people are stupid and they don’t know what they’re missing out on,” she reached out to pat him on the thigh and he tilted his head to the side. “I just needed some time to myself to think about things. You didn’t have to come down here if you didn’t want to.”

“I wanted to,” Negan assured her, dropping back against the sleeping bags. Stretching out his body, Negan looked up at the sky and urged her to lay back with him. “I’m sorry I kind of fucked up your first time. I got carried away.”

“It wasn’t fucked up,” she retorted with sigh as she rested back on the sleeping bag. Negan reached for her hand to grab a hold of it and she felt him bringing it up to his lips to press a kiss over the back of it. “I’m sure with this day in age, it was a decent one.”

“Maybe we should have a do-over,” Negan stated, his expression staying the same while he looked up at the stars. Looking over at Negan, her eyes narrowed and he offered up a bright smile. “Maybe pretend that now is your first time. Under the stars, beside the fire. That sounds more like the right way to do things.”

“Stop, they could see us,” she laughed and Negan shook his head. “Plus, you don’t want to do that again.”

“I actually totally do. Also, they only care about themselves,” Negan sat up and reached for his shirt to pull it from his body. Tossing the material aside, he saw her eyes surveying over his slender form. Starting to undo his pants, Negan got the rest of his clothes off except for his boxer briefs and urged her up onto her knees. “I think it’s only right to do after I fucked up so bad earlier. Don’t be shy now. We fucked in that store and everyone could have heard us.”

“To be fair, I never thought it would be going that far,” she reminded him and watched as Negan undid his sleeping back to spread it completely out.

He did the same with hers before helping to get her out of her clothes. It seemed like Negan didn’t give a shit if anyone saw them as he tugged down his boxer briefs. Yet the whole time the only thing she could think about was the rest of their group seeing them. When Negan leaned her back against the sleeping bag, she watched him pull the sleeping bag in over him as he lowered down over her making her let out a shuddering breath.

“See, now we’re hidden enough for you,” Negan lowered himself over her, bracing himself on his elbows. Dipping down, his lips pressed in over hers and he could feel her palms sliding up over the length of his back. Bracing his weight on his left arm, Negan reached down between them and heard the nervous sound she let out. “You’re already been through the hard part. It won’t get any worse than that moment.”

“It’s still very new for me,” she swallowed down and Negan smiled, lowering his forehead to hers. Instead of going right into it like he had planned, she could feel him touching and caressing her to get her prepared. Lifting up, she kissed him and was eager to have some kind of bond between them. The fact that Negan was willing to do this again was a good thing she thought. That meant maybe he felt for her the way she felt for him. It just took what happened at the store for things to work out. Pulling her mouth from his, she stared him in the eyes and stroked over the side of his face. “You are an amazing man.”

Instead of responding, Negan snickered and his nose wrinkled. Shuddering, she felt Negan reaching between them again. Tracing his tip through her folds, Negan took his time to watch her reaction to it. When she was shaking, Negan took that as initiative to lead his body toward her entrance. Pushing his hips forward, he heard her whimper out and his forehead creased. His jaw lowered and he braced his palms beside her when he entered her fully.

“Fuck,” Negan grunted, lowering his head to nuzzle his nose against her neck. Clutching to Negan’s hair she could feel his thrusts were more careful and drawn out. Much like he had said that he wanted to do. The closeness of their bodies underneath the sleeping bags as well as doing this under the night sky was perfect. This was so good that it almost felt like dream of hers because she would have never pictured having Negan like this. Negan’s head lifted and he stared down at her trying to see if she was enjoying what they were doing. “Better?”

“Much,” she whimpered when he started to quicken the rolling of his hips toward her. Kissing Negan in this position was so much better than earlier in the day. The way he was looking at her, touching her and making sure that every movement was to her liking was amazing. “Negan…”

“Shh…enjoy the moment,” Negan hummed against her lips before sliding his lips to her jawline to press wet kisses over her flesh.

Compared to their first time together, this was exceedingly better. When they had finished Negan had held her in his arms until both of them had fallen asleep. That’s how it had been multiple times after that moment. They would spend all of their time together hanging out and would fall into each other most nights.

Even though he hadn’t said it or they hadn’t really acknowledged it, things felt like they were dating. That’s how close they often were. It was special for Y/N because she felt like she was getting to have a relationship with Negan and she cared greatly for him.

After some time, Negan had won over the trust of the group they were in and people had started looking to Negan instead of Dwight to be in charge after some close calls. It was nice getting to see Negan get the attention that he deserved for saving people and she was proud of him, but it meant getting to spend less time with him.

While she sat sitting alone to herself, she wished she would see Negan since it was her birthday. Reading through the latest book that she had found, she let out a gasp when someone hopped down beside her. A bright smile spread over her features when she realized it was Negan beside her. His dimples sank in when he saw that he had shocked her and he chuckled.

Negan reached inside of his pocket to pull out a cupcake that was wrapped in a package. Ripping it open, Negan held his hand up to motion her to wait a moment as he pulled out a candle to stick it in the middle. She couldn’t help, but giggle when he did it and her eyes connected with his, “What is this?”

“It’s not a homemade cake, but it’s the best I could do right now. I had to pocket this the moment I found it just for this moment,” Negan’s eyebrows arched and he could see that she was shocked with the gesture. A proud smile was over Negan’s face knowing how touched she seemed to be by it. Reaching into his pocket he grabbed the lighter and lit the candle before holding it out close to her. “It’s your birthday. Make a wish.”

“You remembered?” she confirmed and Negan nodded, his face scrunching when she seemed surprised. “This is incredibly nice Negan.”

“The wind is going to blow out the candle and then your wish is going to go completely out the window,” Negan teased and she chuckled before doing as he asked of her. After she blew out the candle, Negan could see that her eyes closed and he took advantage. Moving in to kiss her, he felt her shocked against the movement and when they parted Negan let out an amused breath. “Now what was your other wish?”

“God,” she rolled her eyes, letting out a laugh when Negan moved in to kiss her a few more times playfully. Raising his finger, Negan motioned her to wait as he went over to his bag that was in the distance. Noticing that he had an old Polaroid camera in his hand she could see him swiftly moving toward her. “What is that?”

“I hid these when I picked them up so no one knew I had the good stuff,” Negan looked over his shoulder to make sure they were alone. Wrapping his arm around her shoulders, he pulled her in closer to him and cuddled his head up next to hers. “We’re going to take one…so smile…”

Quickly rising up the Polaroid camera, Negan leaned in to press a kiss in over her cheek to snap a photo of the two of them together. When it came out, he handed it over to her to hold before attempting to take another one. For this one she reached out with her free hand to press in over his chin to pull him closer to her so she could kiss his cheek. Snorting, he grabbed the next photo that came out and went to put the camera back in his bag.

“Now that one is yours…and this one is mine,” Negan waved the photo to try and get it to develop faster and a chuckle fell from his throat. Dropping down beside her again, Negan made sure that he was close to her and could see that she was eyeing over the photo. “What do you think?”

“I think you’re cute,” her eyes met Negan’s. He was watching her closely clearly trying to read how she was feeling. “You know how much I care about you, right?”

“Of course I do,” Negan winked and nudged her playfully with his elbow, “You’re my best friend.”

“I think we’re a bit beyond best friends,” she suggested and Negan shrugged his shoulders before looking down to the photo he had taken for himself.

“I have one more thing that I have planned for tonight,” Negan started to talk to only hear someone call out to him and he looked over his shoulder to see someone in the group waving him down. “Being the leader now sucks because you can’t get ten seconds to fucking breathe, but go to apartment two-c in about two hours, okay? I have some things I have to talk about with the rest of the guys.”

“Why?” her nose wrinkled and Negan hopped up from where he was sitting. He slid his picture that he had into his pocket and looked back toward the person that was waving him down again.

“It’s a birthday thing, so just do it,” Negan ordered, snapping his fingers at her and she shrugged her shoulders. She was completely enamored with Negan and loved him. There was no doubt in that. Whatever he had planned, he seemed pretty proud of, so it excited her.

Waiting those two hours, she headed to the apartment building that they had set up outside of. Moving inside, she went upstairs to the second floor and found the room that he had asked her to come to. Pushing open the door, she let out a nervous sound and saw that he had candles lit in the apartment making her chuckle.

“Negan?” she called out looking in the bedroom hoping to find Negan there when she couldn’t find him in the rest of the apartment. There was a box on the bed that said open me written on it.

Moving forward, she grabbed a hold of it and saw that there was a keychain inside of it. Picking it up, she saw that it was one that had stars on it with the words ‘you are my shining star’ on it. A laugh fell from her throat when she looked it over and ran her thumb over the front of it. She wondered if he had grabbed it for her since the second time that they were together they had done it under the stars together and he made a rather big deal about it.

The sound of something knocking over was heard in the bathroom and she looked over her shoulder toward it. Going to the door, she pushed it open slowly to hear the sounds of loud breaths filling the air. When her eyes fell upon what was inside, she felt her heart breaking.

Negan had Sherry propped up against the sink and her arms were hooked around Negan’s shoulders. Negan’s pants were at his ankles while he thrust his hips up toward her again and again. There was a sinking feeling in her gut while Sherry’s cries filled the small bathroom. Stepping back, Y/N headed for the door and felt her chest aching. She knew that Negan had originally had a thing for Sherry, but she thought at this point after weeks of them being together that Negan actually liked her. For some reason she pictured in her mind that they were dating and they were together. With all the time they had been spending together and the way that Negan had been treating her she just thought more was going on.

Why would he tell her to come to the apartment? Was he planning on hurting her the whole time? All she knew was that she was hurt and broken hearted after what she saw. There was an overwhelming amount of emotions flooding over her as she made it back outside and went to sit on the brick wall that surrounded the apartment building they were at.

About twenty minutes later, she heard someone calling out her name and she glanced over her shoulder to see that Negan was moving out toward her. Ignoring him, she adjusted her position back to where she was before. She hated him right now and with how upset she was, she didn’t even want to see his face.

“You will never guess what just happened,” Negan hopped up on the brick wall with her. There a giant smile spread out over his features, but when he saw her crying he let out a tense breath. A nervous laugh fell from Negan’s throat when he looked her over. “What’s wrong? What happened?”

“Something tells me we’re both reacting over the same thing,” she responded looking at the keychain that was in her hand that Negan had obviously found for her. Lifting her head, her eyes connected with his and she could see that he was genuinely confused. “You’re such an asshole.”

“What?” Negan stammered, a grunt falling from his throat when she slid down from the wall. A moment later she threw the keychain at him and it hit him in the center of the chest before falling into his lap. “Why are you acting like this?”

“I’m so stupid,” she walked off in the distance toward the field that was to the left of the apartment building. Negan hopped down to follow her toward the woods where she was headed. When she got a bit ahead, she felt Negan grabbing a hold of her wrist to tug her back to him. “She doesn’t even like you. You know that? She only fucked you because now you have power. Before people started looking up to you she didn’t even look at you.”

“This is about Sherry?” Negan confirmed with a snort and he watched her folding her arms out in front of her chest. Looking down at the keychain, he held it up and shrugged his shoulders. “She saw me heading into the building and then followed me I guess. I was setting up the thing for your birthday and…”

Negan looked down at the keychain that was in his hand and he lifted his gaze to hers, “Didn’t like your gift?”

“It lost its special meaning when I saw the two of you together,” she tried to leave, but she felt Negan forcing her against one of the trees that was behind her to keep her in place. Wincing, she could feel the bark scraping her arm and Negan loosened his grip when he realized he had hurt her. “Let me go Negan. I don’t want anything to do with you anymore."

“You’re my best friend,” Negan reminded her and his eyebrows bounced up. A laugh fell from her throat when she started crying again and it was clear that Negan was sincerely confused which made this worse. “I don’t understand why you are acting this way? I thought you would be happy for me. You know how I felt about Sherry. I don’t get why you are acting like this.”

“Which makes this so much worse Negan. You really are just a massive piece of shit aren’t you?” she shoved into his chest and Negan let out a grunt when she hit him. She hit him a few more times in the chest and Negan stared down at her with a shocked expression. “I can’t believe I saw more in you than there actually was. I don’t want anything to do with you anymore. I hate you.”

“Now is not the time to be a bitch to me when I’m in charge,” Negan muttered as she started to walk away and Negan’s eyebrows were furrowed when she turned on her heel to look back at him. “You decide to do this to me when things start going right for me? Are you jealous?”

“Wow,” she let out a shocked sound when Negan threw the keychain he had gotten her aside in the dirt. “You think this is me jealous that you are in charge now? You are so blind and stupid if that’s really where you think is coming from.”

There was a moment of silence between them and she reached up to wipe at her face. Shaking her head, she moved to leave him and Negan grabbed her again, pulling her to him. A gasp fell from her throat when she fell into his chest and Negan grabbed a tight hold of her jaw. Digging his fingers into her jaw, he forced her to look at him and he felt her fighting to get out of his grasp until he demanded her attention with the way he grabbed a hold of her.

“I would highly rethink anything you are considering doing or saying to me in the next few minutes,” Negan warned her and he could feel her tears against his fingertips while he turned her head to the side. “I’ve been good to you when I didn’t need to be, so I’d show a little gratitude toward me if you want to still be part of my life.”

Trying to pull herself from his grasp, she winced when his fingers dug deeper into her flesh. The way his angry eyes were hooked on her made her heart hammer inside of her chest. How could he be so oblivious to the fact that she was in love with him and she thought they were actually dating?

Finally, he released her with a shove and it caused her to stumble over her feet making her fall to the ground. Negan stood before her, his eyes narrowing while she slowly pulled herself up into a sitting position on the ground. Rubbing at the side of her face where he had been grabbing her, she felt the tears continue to burn at her eyes knowing that Negan had turned out to be everything that she thought he wasn’t.

Getting up from the ground, she said nothing more and started walking away from Negan toward where her things were. The sound Negan let out showed that he was angry with her for just walking away instead of saying anything more. That night when they were all surrounded by the fire for dinner she had seen Negan glaring out at her and she tried to avoid eye contact with him. It broke her that instead of understanding that he hurt her, he just assumed that she was jealous of him becoming the leader of the group.

After that night, things progressed quickly for Negan. They had found The Sanctuary and Negan had built his team of Saviors. At some point Y/N had thought that Negan would eventually realize what happened and he would come to her to talk to her, but he never did. They never talked after that moment and when he would be around he would never acknowledge her. Somehow she had ended up being one of his lower ranked Saviors and watching Negan marry woman after woman hurt. Especially considering the special circumstances that he hadn’t even clearly known about with her.

Multiple times she had tried to get a meeting with him through Simon. The first few times Simon had seen if Negan would talk to her, but every single time Simon would come back and tell her that Negan didn’t want to talk to her or he was too busy.

After getting pretty desperate she had gone to Negan’s office one night hoping to be able to talk to Negan about some things. She wouldn’t have done if it wasn’t absolutely necessary, but she knew that she had to talk to him. Going at night she assumed that he would be alone, but she let out a disappointed sound when she saw Simon standing near the door talking to Negan. When she made it near the door, Simon heard her steps and the look he gave her when he saw her made him let out a disappointed sound.

“I told you, he doesn’t have time to talk to you,” Simon grunted, stepping into the hallway to reach for her arm to tug her away from the door. “If you have a question, you can come to me later and I will answer it for you.”

“Simon, I get it. I just need to talk to him, okay?” she looked to the door to see Negan sitting at the desk with an amused expression. Instead of being the laid back man she had grown to love, his once messy hair was now slicked back and he had an arrogant smile over his features. “It’s important.”

“Nothing is important enough for you to continuously ignore what I’ve been telling you,” Simon grunted, shoving her toward the railing that surrounded the second floor for people to look down to the first. “You don’t get to just demand time with Negan. If Negan wants to talk to you, he’ll come to you. It doesn’t work the other way around.”

“Negan, please…” she looked beyond Simon toward Negan that was watching the two of them together. It seemed like he was amused with what was happening and she felt her heart breaking knowing that this was a man she was once close to. “I just…”

“I said fuck off,” Simon shoved her again before reaching for her wrist to grasp a tight hold of it. It made her wince with how hard he was holding onto it. The yank he gave her made her cry out as he pulled her away from Negan’s office. “I’ll be right back boss man. This one can’t seem to take a hint.”

“I just have to talk to him about something important,” she tried to reason, but Simon continued to drag her toward the steps to go to the first floor even knowing that her room was on the second floor.

“How many times have I fucking told you no? Huh?” Simon tugged her and she felt her chest aching while he glared down angrily at her. “Maybe some time in one of the dark rooms will make you realize what you’re doing wrong.”

“Simon,” Negan’s voice boomed in behind them and Simon looked over his shoulder to see that Negan was standing in the doorway. “I’ll give her five minutes.”

“Kneel,” Simon ordered with Negan standing before them and when she didn’t she felt Simon digging into her shoulder to get her to lower down. When she didn’t bow for him, Simon forced her to lower her head and Negan’s laugh filled the air. In the past if someone would have manhandled her like that she was certain that Negan would have kicked their ass and not thought twice about it, but now he was laughing. In the past he had saved her more times that she cared to admit, but now he was just as bad as the men he had saved her from if not worse. When Negan started heading back toward his office, Simon allowed her to get up and he shoved her toward the office. When Simon pushed her inside, Negan waved his fingers in the air for Simon to shut the door and Simon obeyed.

Watching Negan saunter over to his seat, she felt her throat going dry as he set Lucille against the side of the desk and then dropped down in his seat. Finally, Negan’s eyes met hers and he simply shrugged his shoulders, “What’s so damn important that you’ve tried to force yourself in here multiple times?”

“We just…we need to talk,” she informed him and Negan gave her a dramatic expression as if motioning her to continue. “I know I upset you a few months ago, but you’ve been avoiding me and refuse to talk to me. I didn’t know how to talk to you. I didn’t think you would just straight up pretend like I didn’t even exist anymore.”

“You don’t to me,” Negan interrupted her, his eyebrows arching up as he spoke and he bit into his bottom lip. “You’re just someone that exists to make the process of this place continue to work. You understand? You’re a resource.”

“That’s not how things used to be,” she swallowed down hard and saw the way that Negan gave her a sideways glance.

“What are you trying to say?” Negan laughed, propping his feet up on his desk while Y/N stared out at him. “I really haven’t had the time to hang out if that’s what you’re talking about. I know we were close before I became the leader, but things change. You know?”

“I know that and I understand that. I know you’re busy,” she knew that she didn’t want to fight with him. She just had to talk to him and tell him something. “What I kind of have to talk about was around that time when were in that wholesale store together.”

She hoped in reminding him of their time together, he would actually start to look at her in a better light. Negan clasped his hands together in his lap. An arrogant smile tugged at his lips when his eyebrows tensed together.

“You’re talking about when I fucked you and took your virginity?” Negan responded and she felt her heart sink when he said it like that that. Nodding, she bit at her bottom lip and sighed heavily. Having him talk like that caused her face to flush over and he acted like it was no big deal. “What about it? Are you just looking to knock booty again?”

“No, there are just a few things about that time that I think we need to talk about. I think I need to be honest with you about something from back then and then you should know something kind of important,” she realized that this was going to be hard because she had never been fully honest with Negan in the past things about things because she was nervous how he would react. “See...that day I told you that I liked someone, I wasn’t completely honest with you because it was you that I liked Negan. I was just nervous to tell you. I didn’t know how you would handle it, so I said what I did. You were the person that I really wanted to be with.”

“Well that’s a smart way to get someone to fuck you if they are the person you are attracted to,” Negan’s face scrunched up and he sat there waiting for her to say something more. “And?”

“I just kind of thought after that moment in the wholesale store that the two of us were dating,” she explained, her voice stammering as she spoke. It was hard to keep eye contact with Negan because his blank stare was almost making her feel small. “We were always together. You kept doing nice things and we were together…a lot. So when I saw you with Sherry on my birthday...”

The smile slowly faded from Negan’s features and his eyebrows bounced up, “That’s why you were a bitch toward me.”

“Within reason I think,” she muttered and Negan snorted before starting to laugh. Negan lowered his head and pinched at the bridge of his nose.

“Well, your actions make sense now that I know you were jealous over me fucking Sherry on your birthday,” Negan almost added emphasis to his words to dig the knife deeper. It made her shift on her feet uncomfortable and he dragged his tongue over his bottom lip. “I don’t know what made you think we were dating though.”

“It was the way you were with me, the things you said,” she recalled how amazing he had been with her after they had slept together the second time.

“Did I ever say we were dating?” Negan inquired, his face turning somewhat red as he stared out at her. Lowering her head, she felt stupid when he said that and realized that he was trying to dig things in harder. “Speak when you are spoken to. Answer me. Did I ever say we were dating?”

“No,” she answered, her eyes burning with the way he was talking to her.

“No, I didn’t,” Negan repeated with a scowl and he dropped his feet down from the desk to place his hands out over the top of it. “In order for people to be dating, you both have to kind of acknowledge it, right?”

“Negan…” she felt a tear sliding down the side of her face and she tried to think of something to say, but was lost for words.

“Right?!” Negan demanded her response and she bit at her bottom lip.

“Right,” she repeated what he wanted her to say.

“So if someone was at fault for thinking there was something more between us…was it me? Or was it you?” Negan grunted and she felt like her body was on fire while he continued to belittle her. The sound of his hand slamming against the top of his desk was heard and it made her jump. “If you continue to avoid answering my questions…”

“It was my fault,” she whispered and even though she didn’t want to be she felt tears sliding down her face. More than anything she wanted to act like this wasn’t bothering her, but it was.

“So I didn’t deserve you treating me like that? Did I?” Negan snapped, but she refused to look at him. Standing up from the desk, Negan moved around and reached for her jaw to force her eyes to connect with his.

“No, you didn’t,” she told him what he wanted to hear and he nodded slowly. The way his jaw was flexing made her uncomfortable. “I just thought after that day you might try to talk to me, but the more power you got the more things changed. You married multiple women and…”

“Get to the point. You’re boring me at this point,” Negan rolled his eyes and firmly released her jaw to move back toward his desk to sit on the edge of it.

“I don’t know, I just thought you might have missed me,” she looked down at herself knowing that she may have not been as much of a looker as she was when they first got together. Things had been rough with being one of his lower level saviors. Her clothes weren’t great and it wasn’t like Negan provided her with things that would draw her to be appealing to him. “That what we had might have been special to you and you would have eventually asked me to…”

“Oh, I see,” Negan chuckled realizing where she was going with this. “You think that the two of us have some kind of connection. You think we have a bond.”

She said nothing, but Negan had a rumble of laughter fall from his throat and he grasped tightly to the edge of the desk, “Back then, I hadn’t had sex since before Lucille died. I would have stuck my cock in any hole that was asking and you were pretty much begging. Now that I’m in charge, I have girls lining up to be my wife. They like the benefits. They like the power. I get to fuck any pussy that I want. I’m not desperate like I was then.”

“Desperate?” she repeated his words and he smiled brightly while nodding once. “So are you saying that I’m not someone that you would want to be with?”

“You’re just not my type,” Negan grunted in almost a vicious tone, his nose wrinkling when he looked her over. “I fucked you because you were there. We didn’t have a bond. We didn’t have something special and I’m honored that your little crush was on me, but what did you expect when you came in here today? That I was going to admit to you that my feelings were the same and I would beg you to be one of my wives too? I didn’t even make you one of my higher up saviors. Fuck, I haven’t even thought about you since that day you got upset with me. Now if you want to fuck again, I’ll consider it, but other than that...I think we’re done here.”

“Okay,” she felt her bottom lip trembling hearing that from Negan she was pretty much undesirable to him. “There is something though…”

“Can’t you take a hint?” Negan growled, his voice getting raspy as he continued to speak. “What does it take to get through that thick skull of yours that I’m not fucking interested? I never was. I never will be and there is nothing you can do to change that. If you want me to fuck you, get over here and bend over the desk and I’ll fuck you if it makes you feel better.”

Gradually Negan pulled apart his belt and opened up his pants, “If it makes you stop bothering me and my men, I’m willing to do it. To leave you on a fucking high since you’re pretty much obsessed with me. You can think of it as a gift from me. Otherwise…piss off.”

“Wow,” she let out a shocked sound when Negan pulled his jacket from his shoulders and tossed it to the couch that was in the corner of his office. Negan unzipped his pants and pushed them down his hips making her let out a disgusted breath. “Do you really think I’m that pathetic that I would want to fuck you after everything you just said to me?”

There was a long silence between them. A smirk pressed in over Negan’s features and his right eyebrow arched up, “Yes? Yes, I do.”

“Being in charge really changed you, didn’t it? You’re not the person that saved me. That was a good man. The man you are now…” she felt her heart hammering inside of her chest with how angry she was at Negan.

“You have no idea the man I was. I was lonely and would have saved anyone at the time to make sure that I had someone with me. Fuck girl. You knew from the start that I had a thing for Sherry. You were just a pussy for me until I got what I really wanted,” Negan looked down toward his body and he grabbed a firm hold of his member. “I bet I was the last person to fuck you, right?”

Her eyes lowered down toward the ground and he could see her hand sliding in over her abdomen making him snort, “Listen, I’m doing you a favor here while also doing one for myself if this makes you finally leave me alone. Get over here and bend over that desk.”

“I think we’re done here,” he could see that she was still upset with him and her jaw tightened as she spoke. “I’m sorry for wasting your time tonight.”

“You’re fucking joking,” Negan scoffed when she went to head for the door and he reached for his pants to pull them back up over his hips. “You come in here telling me that you were hoping that I would make you one of my wives. Looking at me with those doe eyes hoping that I fucking loved you and you’re just going to walk away?”

“Yes,” she simply answered and an angered sound fell from Negan’s throat as he zipped his pants back up before he pulled them together. “I may be pathetic, but I’m not that pathetic.”

“You know I notice you’re getting a little swelled,” Negan muttered as she reached for the doorknob and she stopped in her tracks when he said that. “It’s making me think you have too much food available to you. Maybe you could stand to go on the points system for a little bit so you can get back to your previous look. My saviors should be fit, not getting fat. It gives the wrong look.”

The door pushed open and Y/N felt her blood boiling when Negan moved back toward his desk to sit down.

“You know that’s the whole reason I came here,” she started and Simon moved in behind her, but Negan was done with her as he waved his hand in the air.

“We’re done here,” Negan scoffed making her let out a tense breath when Simon grabbed her to pull her away from the door. “Simon, make sure that it’s made known that Y/N is now going to be working for points. Start her on level one.”

“What?” she snapped seeing Negan lifting his eyes at her, “that’s what someone makes when they first get here and are on probation. I’ve been here since the beginning and I need supplies Negan, you don’t understand.”

“Get her out of here,” Negan demanded and Simon grabbed her before she could say another word, slamming the door shut before she could bicker with Negan anymore.

Once Simon got her away from the door, she started to head for the steps and Simon followed her. When she went to head for the door that went to the outside he grabbed a tight hold of her to stop her, “What the hell do you think you’re doing?”

“I need some air or I’m going to explode. Did me getting demoted make it so I can’t go outside anymore?” she snapped and Simon grunted as she walked outside. Following her out, Simon stood at the stairs and she was pissed that he was watching her. “Why are you following me?”

“People do stupid things when they are angry,” Simon answered and he heard the sound of commotion inside the building. A frustrated sound fell from his throat and he threw his finger up in the air. “You better stay right there.”

“Where am I going to go?” she threw her hands up in the air and could see that Simon was contemplating not going back in, but he did.

It wasn’t actually until Simon said that to her that she was considering leaving. There had to be a place better than this. Somewhere that she would be able to survive without having to deal with the past of the hurt that she would always be reminded of here. Everything that was important to her, she had in her pockets. Everything else she would certainly be caught trying to escape with them if she decided to leave after grabbing her things from her room, so she left them. Surveying the area, she made sure that that the saviors were looking elsewhere when she managed to climb up over the gates surrounding The Sanctuary. She had to be careful not to hurt herself on the barbed wire, but still had managed to knick herself when she went over. Cussing to herself, she ran as fast as she could toward the wooded area to attempt to get out of sight. If someone caught her sneaking out, she knew it wouldn’t be good. She had heard rumors, but she just wanted to be gone and away from Negan. When she had finally made it into the wooded area, she ripped a part of her jacket to tie it around the area she cut from escaping. Doing her best to make it through the darkness, she relied on the moon to move through the woods to the best of her ability. All she had was a knife and she realized how stupid at this point it was for her to actually escape. Back at The Sanctuary she had a room, but being stuck with Negan just felt wrong.

All night she walked and by morning she had found a tree to sit down by to get some rest. There was a sense of regret that had flooded through her because she didn’t know what she was going to do. She had responsibilities and not being able to find any other civilization made her nervous. And she knew how people were.

“Where the fuck could she have gone?” Simon’s voice boomed and she scrambled to hide herself in one of the bushes. “Negan is going to fucking cut my balls off if I don’t find her.”

“You shouldn’t have taken your eyes off of her,” Dwight’s voice responded with a snort. “You knew better than to leave an emotional woman alone.”

“Things were happening and we just need to find her. If we don’t come back with her after he ordered us to find her, I’m dead,” Simon groaned and she could feel herself shaking. “I’m going to kill this bitch when we get her back to The Sanctuary myself for causing me so much fucking trouble. I can’t wait to put her on the damn fence with all the others…”

A flood of panic rushed through Y/N when she realized what happened to those that escaped from The Sanctuary when they were caught. The sound of Dwight snorting was heard and she attempted to stay exceedingly still, “Negan doesn’t do that to women.”

“I think this woman would be an exception, she had him fucking pissed off last night,” Simon retorted surveying the area and he let out a frustrated sound. “Do you remember when we were just that small group? I swore the two of them were together, but…”

“Does it matter?” Dwight snorted and Simon groaned. The sound of something rattling was heard and she noticed that her canteen had slid out. “What was that?”

Simon started walking down the hill toward her and she cringed knowing that in no time he would find her. Wincing, she waited until the sound of something else drew Simon to look over his shoulder and he started heading the other way. Sliding out from the brushes, she went to leave only to feel someone grab her by the shoulder. A pair of blue eyes were locked on hers and she felt her heart pounding inside of her chest. The curly, short haired man motioned for her to be quiet and she realized he must have been the one to make the noise to get Simon away. Following the man through the woods, she stayed quiet until they showed up at the gates of a place called Alexandria.

“What is this?” she muttered and the man looked to her with an arched brow. “Who are you?”

“My name is Aaron,” he placed his hand over the center of his chest and he looked back toward the walls that surrounded the town that was inside. “How many walkers have you killed?”

“I lost count at this point,” she was honest knowing that she had gone through so much in the short amount of time.

“How many people have you killed?” Aaron poked and she let out a shuddering breath before shaking her head.

“None,” she was honest and swallowed down hard knowing that it likely made her look pathetic since she wasn’t much of a fighter. “Why?”

“Then welcome to our community,” Aaron whistled and someone opened the doors allowing her in.

After that moment she had become part of the community of Alexandria. Thankfully she had been able to avoid Negan when he had found Alexandria and things were great until they had Negan prisoned in Alexandria after they had captured Negan. She worked so hard to avoid seeing Negan, but when they ordered her to take him his food one day; she knew that she had no choice because everyone else was busy.

Muttering to herself over and over, she told herself that it would be fine. It had been too long. Negan wouldn’t even know who she was. It had been years. All she had to do was give him his food and leave. She repeated that like a mantra. Once she headed down the stairs, she could see Negan slouched over on his cot. The look of him was nothing like she was used to with his long beard and his hair that had been cut to a mess. Someone at Alexandria likely had done that haircut for him in a rush without a care if they were nicking Negan’s flesh.

Keeping her head low, she put the tray of food on the ground for Negan before his cell. Negan lifted his head and she hoped that he just wouldn’t notice her. Attempting to turn on her heel, she heard the sound of his breathing change, “Y/N?”

Immediately regretting her decision not to throw this task off on someone else, she watched Negan slowly get up from the cot and move to the bars. Looking over her shoulder, she saw Negan’s long, slender fingers wrapping around the bars and he let out a desperate sound when his eyes met hers, “God, it is you. I thought you were dead.”

“Nope, I’m alive,” she simply stated and Negan’s eyes were big. There were multiple cuts and bruises on Negan’s face and she had a hard time looking at him. “So are you.”

“I don’t know for how much longer,” Negan stammered, his eyebrows arched and it was clear that he was full of remorse. Negan had gotten much skinnier than what she was used to and remembered. Instead of sticking around, she knew it would be for the best if she left.

“You should eat,” she attempted to leave, but Negan reached through the bars and grabbed a tight hold of her wrist to get her to stop from leaving.

“You have to help me,” Negan pleaded, his eyes hooked on hers and he could see the uncomfortable look over her face. “Please. I can’t keep living like this. They beat on me. No one talks to me. No one should have to live like this. Please help me.”

“I don’t think I could,” she explained seeing that Negan’s eyes were full of hope after he had realized he knew her.

“Come on, we were friends,” Negan clutched to the bars, his eyes pleading with her. Offering up a weak smile, he attempted to reach out again to grasp at her fingers, but she pulled away from him. “You have to feel some kind of connection to me, right? I was the guy to take your virginity. Remember? We had something special. The two of us had a bond when this whole thing started. You were in love with me. I can’t live like this Y/N. Please help me.”

There was a silence that filled the air around them and suddenly she was having flashes of the last time that Negan had spoken with her in his office. The way he belittled her and down talked her still resonated deeply with her and she still remembered those words he told her. It left her bitter and angry toward him.

“Funny how that’s your story now that you have nothing and no one,” she bit at her bottom lip watching the hopeful expression slowly leaving Negan’s eyes. “You fucked me because I was just there. You were desperate. We didn’t have a bond. We didn’t have something special. Do these words stick with you Negan?”

“I was being an asshole that day because I was still mad at you for abandoning me. I thought you were my best friend and you got pissed at me. I realize that I should have been more caring about your feelings when you were telling me how you felt, but at the time when we were together I just thought we were friends that were sleeping together,” Negan attempted to explain with a grunt, his eyes still desperate for her to help him. “All I wanted was Sherry at that point and then when you abandoned me for getting the one thing I wanted. I just got so angry at you that I was treating you like shit, but after thinking about it…after losing you I knew the way I treated you was wrong.”

“You didn’t lose me because you didn’t want me in the first place,” she corrected him and Negan frowned when she said that.

“I didn’t think that you were in love with me, but after that day you told me how you felt, I thought back on it and I realize you were right that there was something special between the two of us,” Negan assured her and attempted to reach for her fingers to squeeze at them. “I didn’t mean what I said Y/N. I didn’t realize you were going to run away from me. I’m sorry for what I said. My relationship with you was very important to me. I love you. I can tell by the way you look at me that you still love me too.”

This was everything she had ever wanted to hear from him in the past. This was kind of what she had hoped for when she talked to him at The Sanctuary, but she knew the kind of manipulator Negan had become. He was the master of it.

“That’s where you’re wrong Negan,” she looked down toward his fingers that were hooked with hers and she shook her head slowly. Pulling her hand from his she stepped back toward the door to his cell and shrugged her shoulders. “You’re just not my type.”

“Y/N?” Negan called out her name as she headed for the door leaving him with what he had said to her back then. When she closed the door to his cell she could hear him screaming her name and the word please afterwards. It sound like he was sobbing, but she didn’t care. Not after all he had put her through during those few months at The Sanctuary.

Everything was fine for years after that. They never pushed her to have to see Negan again and she lived life the best possible way she could. Six years had passed and Y/N had found herself coming home late after working all day. Moving upstairs toward her room, she checked on something before heading toward her room. When she pushed open the door, a gasp fell from her lips when she saw Negan standing in her bedroom at her dresser. There was something he was holding in his fingertips and when his eyes met hers, she could see the anger that was there.

Turning the Polaroid that he had in his fingers, she could see that it was the photo that Negan had taken of them on her birthday that he had given her. It was something that she had kept on the mirror of her dresser to remind her of a day when she felt happy and hopeful about her future. Negan lifted his other hand and showed that he had the keychain he had given her that he had originally thrown in the dirt wrapped around his middle finger.

“I’m just not your type, huh?” Negan dropped what he was holding and swiftly moved forward to reach for her. She attempted to move, but he grabbed a tight hold of her and wrapped his arms around her from behind so she couldn’t escape. “You’re so fucking full of shit. I fucking hurt your feelings and you let me rot in that cell for six years because of it. When this whole fucking time you were still fucking in love with me.”

“Negan,” she whimpered feeling his hand wrapping around her mouth to keep her quiet. The way she struggled and he fought her back made her panic. How had Negan escaped his cell? Her eyes met Negan’s in the mirror of her dresser set. With his buzzed hair and the angry way his eyebrows were arched, he looked like a completely different man to her.

“I would have never left you to rot like that,” Negan growled against the side of her neck. Before he could do anything further the sound of her bedroom door being pushed open was heard and Negan looked over his shoulder.

“Mom?” a voice filled the air and Negan lifted his eyes to see a young girl standing at the door holding a teddy bear in her arms. The sight of the little girl made Negan let her go and when he did she immediately moved for her daughter. “What’s going on?”

“Mommy’s friend was just playing with her,” she hushed her daughter looking back at Negan who was staring out at them together. There was apprehension in her daughter’s body while she stared out at Negan with big eyes. “Baby, you need to go back to your bedroom, okay? Mommy will come see you in the morning.”

“What’s your name sweetheart?” Negan called out and Y/N shot him a glare. Ignoring it, Negan stepped forward and stared down at the young girl. There was something in the way her bright hazel eyes were staring up at him that made him let out a tense breath.

“Riley,” she answered him and Negan’s eyebrows bounced up. Kneeling down, Negan tilted his head to the side and surveyed over Y/N’s daughter.

“How old are you sweetheart?” Negan looked between Y/N and Riley. There was an expression that made Y/N uncomfortable as she stepped forward to move in behind Riley to make sure her presence was known between Negan and her daughter.

“Nine,” Riley answered and Negan’s eyes hooked with Y/N’s. Negan reached out to place his hand in over the young girl’s shoulder. There was a new expression over Negan’s features that she couldn’t quite read. “Who are you?”

“My name is Negan. Does that name mean anything to you?” Negan questioned and Riley looked up to Y/N for some kind of confirmation that she should know who Negan was. “Tell me Riley, who is your daddy here?”

“Baby go to your bedroom,” Y/N ordered, interrupting the two of them before Negan could go any further with this discussion. Riley was confused, but she clutched tightly to her bear and nodded. As Riley moved for the door, Negan stood up and Y/N pushed her hands into Negan’s chest to keep him where he was. “I love you sweetheart.”

“I love you too mommy,” Riley whispered and her big eyes looked between Negan and Y/N before leaving the two of them alone.

Once Y/N was sure that Riley was in her room, she turned on her heel to look back at Negan and his face scrunched up in anger, “That’s my fucking daughter. She looks just like me. How could you keep my child from me?”

“Oh no, it could never be your child Negan. Remember? You can’t have babies. You’re infertile,” she reminded Negan seeing the way his jaw locked up when she said that, folding her arms in front of her chest. Negan moved over toward her bed and sat on the corner of the bed. “Fuck you Negan. You told me the first time I slept with you that you were infertile. So we didn’t have to worry about you pulling out.”

“So maybe I didn’t know for sure, but I assumed because we tried for so long and I just knew that it never happened,” Negan admitted, his eyes heavy with regret when he threw his hands up in the air. “Why did you leave The Sanctuary if you were pregnant?”

“I tried to tell you that I was pregnant, but instead you called me fat and then put me on the points system so I wouldn’t be able to take care of myself,” she snapped making Negan release a loud gulping sound. “I ran away in hopes of finding something better because you wouldn’t fucking listen. When I’m hiding in the woods I hear Simon talking about you killing me and putting me on the fence…”

“I wouldn’t have killed you and put you on the fence,” Negan rolled his eyes when he heard her say that and she snorted. “Simon was a fucking idiot. One I killed, but…”

“What do you want Negan? You know if they find out that you escaped the cell, then they are going to kill you,” she informed him, her eyes looking him over seeing that he was still in his prison clothes. “Why are you here?”

“After being locked away for six years, you tend to hold grudges and want answers as to why you leave someone rotting in a cell. Then I come up here and see that you still have that fucking keychain I got you for your birthday and have that photo of the two of us…” Negan growled, his eyes rising to hers and he shook his head slowly. “You loved me still and you let me rot in that cell. Knowing that you had my daughter…”

“You were bullshitting me Negan. Telling me that you loved me,” she reminded him and Negan gave her a sideways glance. “You didn’t love me. You never loved me.”

“That’s not true, okay? I did love you, but I genuinely just ignorantly thought we were best friends. I didn’t think about what I was doing to you,” Negan responded, reaching up to pinch the bridge of his nose. “The more I thought about it, the more obvious it became to me how stupid I actually was. I totally was falling in love with you and then Sherry followed me to that fucking room and I thought about how long I had been pining for her. I wanted her so bad and there she was offering it and I took it. It was wrong. It was awful and I should have told her no. If I would have…I think things would have been so different.”

“Well we can’t turn back time,” she frowned, her eyes looking down toward the ground and she watched Negan stand up from the bed. Slowly, he walked across the room to her and reached out to cup her face in his rough hands. Negan’s eyes were hooked on hers and it seemed like he was attempting to kiss her, but she turned her head away from him. “Don’t.”

“Y/N, I think this is a sign that we should be together. I’ve always wanted a child. I know I feel special feelings toward you and I know you feel the same,” Negan reasoned with her and he could see that her eyes were tearing over while she stared out at him. “Maybe we deserve the chance to start over. The three of us.”

“She deserves better than you,” Y/N muttered and Negan released a hurt sound when she was obviously talking about Riley, “And so do I. I would love to pretend that nothing happened, but the people here would tell Riley. They would let her know who her father was and what he did. And I’ll always remember the things you said to me.”

“I’m leaving. We should all get out of here,” Negan suggested, reaching for her hands to give them a firm squeeze. “I know what I did and I’m sorry, but you have to understand…”

“I get why you did it Negan, I just…I can’t,” her bottom lip quivered and Negan could feel his chest aching as she stood before him. “Of course I’ll always love you, but I have to think about Riley and what’s best for her. And that’s not you.”

“Well…damn,” Negan responded, absolutely gutted with what she was saying. Stepping back, he brushed his hand over his head and then tossed his hands up in the air. “I guess this is goodbye then.”

“Where are you going?” she inquired as he moved toward the door to leave and he stopped to look over his shoulder at her.

“I thought about looking at The Sanctuary. See how things are there,” Negan pushed his hands into his pockets and he looked down toward the ground. When she nodded, Negan attempted to leave before stopping again. “What would make you change your mind about me? What could I do that would make you give me a chance?”

“You’re you Negan, you couldn’t change,” she saw his eyebrows furrow and she shrugged her shoulders. The look Negan gave her showed that he was miserable with what she had said. When he headed to leave again, she called out to him and he looked over his shoulder at her. “I’m sorry. No one should have had to go through what you did those eight years, but I was scared. I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry too,” Negan stood there for a moment longer before she watched him walk away and she felt her heart breaking.

More than anything in the past she had wanted Negan to love her and to be with him. But after eight years she knew that it was wrong to want to be with him. Yes, she loved him, but knowing the baggage that follows him, she knew it was best for both her and her daughter if he wasn’t in their lives. When the sound of the front door opening and closing was heard, she let out a sad sound and reached for the photo that Negan had dropped on the floor.

Holding the photograph, she wished that things could go back to the way things were before, but she knew better and she knew that this was the best possible decision she could make. No matter how much it hurt.

#Negan #negan fanfiction #Jeffrey Dean Morgan #The Walking Dead

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