#because something about how it's discussed means I don't want to have any engagement with it

[fortunatelychaoticphantom]

I am so confused by comments around here where people complain "it's been X years! Let it go!!" in fandom discussions. Do you... do you not know how the internet works? Do you not know how media works? Do you think you are only allowed to talk about a piece of media during or right after its publishing and then you are forbidden from ever meaningfully engaging with it ever again? Do you think everyone in the world, including people who haven't been born yet, consume all media at the exact same time and never interact with it ever again afterwards? Also, like, the irony of complaining about a discussion happening in a certain fandom X years after it finished airing, by engaging in this fandom X years after is finished airing. Also, imagine telling an academic "omg get over it! The Illiad was published 2800 years ago!!!". Like, great take, Gretchen. That was very helpful.

#yes i'm talking about avatar #but this applies to any and all fandoms and media #honestly i barely engage with this fandom anymore beyond fanart #but just because i've had enough doesn't mean others feel the same #and they have a right to share their feelings and thoughts #no matter how long ago the show ended #if you don't want to talk about something just don't #but you can't and SHOULDN'T try to stop others #let's be honest it also usually one side of certain discussions that don't want to talk about certain thing #whether they were asked to or not... #atla #avatar the last airbender #fandom #tumblr things

[fuckyeahrevresbo]

I find it kind of interesting how the way certain people talk about things that they (presumably) find impressive make it so I never engage with it.

I have no idea who this “chocolate guy” is, I think he makes some kind of sculptures out of chocolate based on a couple of text posts that have been across my dash, but whenever one of his videos come up, the comments I see underneath are all some variation of “It’s the fucking chocolate guy again.” I presume, again, that this is just disbelief about the wild things he’s doing, but seeing it phrased like that makes me immediately keep scrolling. I have never seen one of these videos, and literally the entire reason is on every one that gets passed around, there’s always at least one “this fucker” on there.

#I dunno #I've said the stop it how dare you thing before #usually to actually good pianists #but seeing that particular brand of comment on some kind of chocolate thing makes me actively avoid it #hard to say why #also maybe it's the circles I'm in but it's also interesting that literally every video of his that comes across my dash #always has one if not multiple comments in that vein #every one #I get that it's probably a tumblr bit but unlike a lot of bits on here it's one that keeps me away from it #on an only tangentially related note there's a similar vibe with how I've seen Homestuck discussed and so I have also stayed away from that #and when I see something innocuous that someone has appended that Homestuck police image to I never reblog #because something about how it's discussed means I don't want to have any engagement with it #and as it's often innocuous things where I have literally no idea if there is a deliberate homestuck reference #it gets me sometimes concerned that people will put it on stuff of mine or stuff I reblog #and I don't even like being accidentally associated with it #anyways the chocolate guy is probably an awesome creator and I'm going to continue actively avoiding any of his content #not sure if there's a point to this message #I don't expect anyone to change how they talk about stuff over it and I'm not sure it's better if they do #But it's interesting to me to reflect on the fact that these trends cause active avoidance from me

[loveemagicpeace]

🍯Astrology Notes🍯

🪴Virgo rising- are very caring people. They take great care to ensure that you have everything you need, especially for your health. They will be able to tell you a lot about various medicines.

🌱Gemini rising- funny as fuck sometimes. They are people who talk and don't stop. You can discuss all possible topics with them if you want. They have a very open mind. But when it comes to being able to do something, sometimes they are not so open to new things. Let's say one difference between them and Sagittarius is that they are not traveling types and they don't like to travel that much.

💫You will feel most comfortable talking to people with whom you have the same compatible moon and mercury in your house. for example: mercury in the 9th house and the other person has mercury in the 1st house. With this you can see what topics you can discuss with others.

🪐People who has saturn in 1st house looks better when they are skinnier. Because their bones and body structure are more beautifully emphasized. Many times they can have weight problems(they can quickly lose weight from worry).

🍀Earth signs look very down to earth even when they are joking around. Even when they make a crazy joke, they still look down to earth.

🐚Scorpios quickly stop trusting you. You just have to do one thing and they are done trusting you. When they see that you are dishonest to them in any kind of way, they will not trust you anymore. Especially when they get to know someone from the beginning and notice that they didn't tell them something or hid something from them, and as I said, it could be just one small thing like say you're going to say you're eating pizza, but in reality you're eating hamburger. It is small lie. But this is sometimes also one of the reasons why pisces and scorpio don't go so well together. Because pisces tend not to say everything while scorpios are. Many times, pisces swim off into their fantasy world and sometimes get lost in it. Scorpios are always looking for the truth in everything. I have seen successful Scorpio/Capricorn couples many times.

🍁Fire signs are actually very active people. So you have to prove them love with actions. They want to see how much you are willing to do for them and how much you are willing to risk. When you go beyond your limits and do something really crazy for them, they will really appreciate it.

💷2nd house represents your money & 8th house where you invest money. The 2nd house reflects your underlying relationship to money and patterns around money are often deeply ingrained. With the Moon in Cancer here, your emotional wellbeing rises and falls with your bank balance, both of which may be subject to flux. You can be a rags-to-riches success, but with Saturn in the 2nd you might always feel poor, the millionaire who still buys the budget range at the supermarket. The 8th house is concerned with debt and our relationship to institutions which provide loans, mortgages, and overdrafts. Capricorn on the cusp of the 8th suggests paying your dues and insisting on a proper contract, Sagittarius here you can invest a lot in travel or even illegal things.

☀️The Sun is the central flame of our vitality. Acting according to your Sun sign and engaging in activities denoted by the house it occupies are important ways to increase your energy and vigour. For instance, with Sun in the 1st, you might need time alone in order to recoup your energies - the presence of others can drain you, Or with Sun in the 6th, maybe you like to spend spare time working in the garden or catching up on DIY. The Sun in Sagittarius might mean you like to explore far afield; if in Aquarius maybe you like to holiday with a group of friends. Sun in Scorpio- working in the shadows or researching something no one knows about is best for you. Sun in 7th house you like to devote a lot of your time to your partner.

🧸Some signs are naturally more work-oriented and some more suggestive of needing a slower pace. Capricorn (or its ruler Saturn) is often highlighted in the charts of anyone with a strong work ethic - by contrast, Leo, Libra, or Pisces might engender a bit more need for time off, to play, relax, or dream. Each Zodiac sign has its ideal gap year or holiday. The fire signs might favour adventure breaks, the air signs a chance to meet new faces, the earth signs maybe an eco-trip; and the water signs a sojourn by the sea or in quiet, restful places.

🩰The IC and the 4th house describe home, both as a physical place and as an inner sense of roots, safety, and foundation. If you have Jupiter in the 4th, it might feel natural to you to travel around or you might even choose to live abroad - or with Uranus here, you may experience many changes of home(many unexpected moves). With the Sun or Moon in the 4th, you might be so strongly connected to home and homeland that uprooting yourself will not be easy - your Sun here suggests your life revolves around home in some way, the Moon that your emotional wellbeing is closely tied to it. With Pluto you can feel that your home is intense and that you are always transforming through it (but it can also leave bad memories). With Mercury can mean that you change your home a lot. With Mars you may feel that your home is often chaotic or aggressive and you are looking for a home where you can become independent. With Neptune many times your home is confusing, strange. Many times you find your ideal place somewhere by the ocean. With Venus your home is loving, genuine and you have loving parents to whom you love to return. But it can involve a lot of money or love based on it. So you can feel that your parents never really appreciated you if you didn't have money.

🧚🏼‍♀️About Aquarius: I want to say one thing about them. I would say that if they really really want they will do it. But most likely they are independent people & lost souls sometimes. I think that they are scared of attachment. So that's why they are rather alone. They are looking for someone. Who will be goofy as they are.

💌I think Valentine's Day is for Libras. Libra is a sign of love, romance,beautiful things. And if any sign is inclined to & like to celebrate this day, it's definitely the Libra. But I find it a little strange that it is in Aquarius season.

💘Cupido is definitely a Sagittarius sign. Although people don't believe that Sagittarians are so loving and romantic, but they really are. Cupido shoots into the hearts of people who are meant to be together. If you hit a sagittarius deep in the heart with your love, then you can see the true side of them. Then you can see how loving they are.

🌅The people you attract into your life are usually connected to your North Node.For ex.: North node in Virgo in your 8th house- you will mostly be attracted to people who have a virgo placements, scoprpio placements, or pisces/ taurus placements.

🌊Pluto symbolizes power in whatever house it is. The power you feel in yourself and the people around you. Strong experience of feelings. For ex.: 5th house - privacy, romance, jealousy, strong emotions, strong happiness, attitude towards the things you do, you feel strong love, devotion. Obsession with changing partners maybe or affairs idk. 6th house - obsessed with perfection, control, work, high expectations. 7th house - you attract a lot of possessive partners, obsession with your partner, but at the same time you can be afraid to get into a relationship, mistrust. 8th house rulership- curious, constant control, secrets, power over your secrets, emotional transformations, many dark things, connection with birth and death, great interest in hidden things. 10th house - people can see you as a strong opponent, driven for a career, they can see you as a person who has a lot of secrets, you can present people with challenges. Big influence.

-Rebekah🧚🏼‍♀️🩰🌙

#astrology #zodiac signs #energy #my notes #astrological houses #astrology observations #birth chart #planets #love

[jellybeanium124]

Helpful lists of questions for goyim when it comes to engaging with the Israel-Hamas war 🙂

QUESTIONS TO ASK YOURSELF WHEN A POST ABOUT THE ISRAEL-HAMAS WAR CROSSES YOUR DASH AND YOU WANT TO REBLOG IT:

Does this post link to a source?

If the post does link to a source, is it a credible one?

If the post does not link to a source, is there one screenshotted in the post that you can find? If so, please search out that source and read the entire thing in context. And make sure the source is credible. Ideally, if you decide to reblog it, add a link to the source.

Is the post just screenshots of tweets? If so, you probably should not reblog this. Posts that are just screenshots of tweets are a massive red flag. Do not believe something because it's a twitter screenshot. Frankly this rule is for everyone about everything all the time.

What is the tone of the post? Does it make you angry? If yes, this is a red flag. Exercise caution reblogging.

Does the post frame Israel as a uniquely evil country in need of destruction? Does the post treat Israel with different standards than those that are applied to every other country that has done horrible, horrible things, such as Russia, the UK, or United States? This is a red flag. If the government of Israel falls without some sort of transition plan, there will be Jewish genocide. Anyone advocating for a one-state solution either way is advocating for one group to get genocided. A two-state solution is the only possible peaceful end to this conflict (technically my opinion but I feel comfy stating it as fact).

Does the post treat Hamas as anything other than a terrorist organization? Do not reblog.

Is the post promoting Jewish Voice for Peace/JVP? Do not reblog. That organization is not Jewish and is antisemitic.

What is the focus of the content of the post? Is the post discussing reasonable paths to a ceasefire/peace? Is the post criticizing Israel's actions without using antisemitic stereotypes? Netanyahu is a disgusting fascist who I hate, but even though he is a terrible person you are not allowed to portray him as an antisemitic caricature. Similar to how you don't get to misgender shitty trans people, you don't get to be antisemitic towards shitty Jewish people (even if he's really, really shitty).

How does the post use the word "zionist?" Does the word have any coherent meaning in the post besides "person (often Jew) that I hate?" Does it treat zionists as a group of people who are disgusting and deserve to be murdered and/or raped? Does the use of the word "zionist" completely dehumanize the person/people the label is applied to into nothing more than evil that the Earth must be rid of? This is antisemitic. Do not reblog.

QUESTIONS TO ASK YOURSELF WHEN YOU'RE AT A PRO-PALESTINE PROTEST:

Are people chanting antisemitic slogans such as "globalize the intifada" and/or "from the river to the sea" (these are both antisemitic you cannot remove the antisemitic meaning from them, they are both advocating for the murder of Jewish people, sorry, stop using them.)?

Are people comparing themselves to Palestinians in Gaza? (this is not a joke, I saw a video of a Columbia student who compared Columbia sending out fliers to leave or be suspended to the IDF dropping flyers in Gaza saying "the army is coming in 24 hours.") If so, they care more about fetishizing Palestinian pain and making themselves feel like noble victims than the Israel-Palestine conflict.

Are people harassing Jews? This includes: preventing them from getting to class, yelling things at them like "go back to Poland," and/or physically assaulting them.

Are people defacing Jewish property/monuments? Are people defacing synagogues? Businesses with known Jewish owners? Statues and/or memorials of/for Jews?

What is the purpose of this protest? Would you feel comfortable sharing opinions that differ from the majority? Would you feel comfortable engaging in a conversation about this issue with fellow protesters? Are any of you actually educated on the complicated and lengthy history of the Israel-Palestine conflict? Is the protest about a peaceful solution, or is it just making you angrier and/or more upset? Does the protest/your fellow protestors care more about freeing Palestine so that Palestinians and Israelis can live in peace, or about hating Israel and treating it like a uniquely evil country?

If people are chanting antisemitic slogans, harassing Jews, and/or defacing Jewish things, then this is an antisemitic protest. Do you want to be associated with these people and this protest? If your answer is yes, you are an antisemite-sympathizer, which is basically an antisemite.

MORAL OF THE STORY: antisemitism is all over this issue and it's easy to get more antisemitic and spread antisemitism because bad actors use this issue to indoctrinate people who start off just genuinely caring about the issue but are not educated at all about it or what antisemitism actually looks like. BE CAREFUL. All Jews want, all we've ever wanted, is to be left alone to do our thing. Random Jews are not at fault for the horrific actions taken by the Israeli government since the terrorist attack on October 7th. We support the existence of Israel, but we do not support all of the current government's actions. We are just trying to live. We want there to be a ceasefire now. If you actually read this whole thing, thank you. It means a lot to be listened to.

For those of you that made it to the end, I'll offer one last reminder and one last gentle suggestion.

My last reminder is: "it is not your job to finish the work by neither are you free to ignore it" is a Jewish passage I really like. I think in times like these, it is important to focus on the first half. It is not your job to finish the work. The fate of Palestine does not rest on your shoulders. It's ok. Take time to decompress and log off.

My last suggestion is: one of the biggest Jewish values is "tikkun olam," which means "repairing the world." I think all action when it comes to this conflict (and life in general) should be done with tikkun olam in mind. It doesn't hurt to ask yourself "is this action repairing the world, or further tearing it apart?" no matter what you're doing. Thank you for reading.

#jumblr

[cy-cyborg]

It will never not be frustrating to me that amputees appear in fiction ALL. THE. TIME. and yet they're almost never acknowledged as such. The Cyberpunk genre is especially guilty of this: amputees and prosthetics becoming a normalised part of life are a defining part of the genre/aesthetic and yet no one even consults with any amputees about how we get represented there. Most writers in those genres don't even consider that giving your characters cybernetic arms and legs means they're an amputee.

CW: Ableism, dehumanisation

This makes it REALLY uncomfortable to engage with stories in the genre because another common aspect of cyberpunk is the idea of losing yourself and becoming something distinctly not-human anymore because you have too many cybernetic augmentations/implants. Shadowrun even has mechanics for this, which state if you get too many prosthetics, which is what cybernetics are 9 times out of 10, your character becomes a monster. These mechanics and discussions surrounding "how many robot bits make you not human anymore" are really, really uncomfortable when you remember this isn't something that's unique to a far-off future setting. Those people you're discussing the humanity of already exist. They're called amputees. If you reframe the question as "how many amputations can you have before you stop being a person" I hope you can see why an amputee like myself is not going to feel safe around you or in your fandoms.

And it's a shame, because I REALLY want to like Cyberpunk. I really, honestly do. I love the aesthetics, I love the idea of big corporations being the villains and the anti-capitalism at the heart of the genre, and I love the idea of prosthetics being not only destigmatised, but desirable. When written from a disability-inclusive lense, it honestly has the potential to be an incredibly uplifting and empowering genre. but as the genre stands right now, it's actively hostile to the very folks who are usually the stars of its stories: amputees, all because people just refuse to acknowledge us.

Cyberpunk isn't the only genre guilty of this, it's common all throughout sci-fi as a whole, but Cyberpunk is the only one where it starts becoming a serious issue due to its rampant dehumanisation of a real group of people. In other sci-fi settings, it's just kind of annoying and while it can be a form of erasure, it's not usually harmful, just...frustrating. Fantasy does it on occasion too, think pirates with a hook and a peg leg, but nowhere near as much.

If you, as an author or creator, use any of these words to describe a character or their tech in a sci-fi setting:

cybernetics/cybernetic enhancements

bionics

robot limbs

cyborgs

augmentations

You are probably writing an amputee. Please, at the very least, acknowledge it, and be mindful that those are real people who actually exist, not just a fantasy group you can speculate about.

edit:

I originally posted this article on my old Tumblr account and lot of people commented/reblogged to tell me that originally in cyberpunk, the "less human the more robot bits you have" only applied to people who opted for their limbs to be replaced by cybernetics, because it was seen as "renting out your body to corporations for money" but people who had to get cybernetics out of necessity weren't impacted. The thing is though, I really don't think that makes it better, for a few reasons. For one, where do you draw the line at "opting" to get a cybernetic prosthetic? This isn't a black and white thing, even in real life. Most amputations are done out of necessity, but there are situations where it's not the only option, just the best one. Talking from personal experience, I lost both my legs below the knee as a baby, that was a pretty clear cut case, I had a blood infection and gangrene and they had to act fast. But the infection caused lasting side effects and impacted my physical body's development and growth. By the time I got to my early 20's it was causing a lot of pain in my right leg, in my knee specifically, and when I got a bone infection in the end of that stump, I chose to have the whole thing amputated up to the knee. They only needed to take a few inches off the end of my stump, but I asked them to go higher, because of the ongoing issues in that knee, issues that would have been made worse by the shortening of the leg. I choose to remove the whole thing, knowing the joint was degrading and I probably would have lost it later in life anyway. Even if it was salvageable, it would mean much more surgery, and I've had enough of those. A boy I played wheelchair basketball with was born with a partially formed leg, it was half the size of his other leg and he wasn't able to use it al all, it was just dead weight, so he opted to get it amputated too for convenience and so he could use a prosthetic on that side. I worked with a girl who's hand didn't form properly in the womb, resulting in a normal palm, but tiny "finger nubs" (her words) with no bones inside. They weren't actively harming her usually, but she opted to get them and the top of her palm amputated after an incident at work where we were tying balloons and one of her nubs got stuck in the knot. She decided to get them amputated because it meant accidents like that would be less likely, and she could use a prosthetic more comfortably. All 3 of these are considered "optional" amputations, so would people like us be penalised in your setting? does it make sense that the technology in your setting can tell the difference, or that corporations would care about the how and why? Even stepping away from medical grey areas, if your character opts for a cybernetic arm because the corporations will financially reward her, and she's struggling to put food on the table without that help, is that really optional?

Don't get me wrong, I do think that idea could work but it would take a lot of work to do well, and most works I've seen don't do the work. Even if they did though, it doesn't change the fact that most modern uses of this trope don't mention that bit or actively ignore it. It doesn't matter in most cyberpunk works I've seen if the amputation was optional or out of necessity, they still are more prone to being seen as "less human" and in most of the sci-fi writing communities I've been part of, the authors are genuinely shocked when I ask them to remember "people with cybernetics are real people already, they're not some far-off-distant future fantasy group, they're just called amputees". Like it didn't even cross their minds. These are the people creating the works in this genre. Even if it wasn't the original intention of the genre, it's still an issue in the modern version of it. Edit 2: Elaborated a little more on why I don't think the "only people who choose it" argument works in the edit. Also, please stop telling me that old cyberpunk doesn't have this issue, I literally address that in the post lol.

#Writing Disability with Cy Cyborg #id in alt text #disability #disabled #disabilities #disabled community #disability representation #cyberpunk #scifi #disability in media #writing disability #writing #writer #amputee #amputees in media #writblr #writerblr #authors of tumblr #cybernetics #cyborgs #science fiction #sci fi #science fantasy

[bonny-kookoo]

Jungkook: Why Not 🔞

In which Jungkook has you figured out. Dirty humor, mean and bratty- you're pretty much simply a bitch. So why are you crying over some scraped up knees and a dirty plushy?

Tags/Warnings: non-Idol AU, enemies to lovers, reader acts like she could kill but is actually a cinnamon roll, Jungkook just simply is a cinnamon roll, adult themes, fluff, romance, short!reader go cry about it, smut but very low-carb (handjob, cum in pants oops), slight DDLG-aspects/themes? Soft daddy/dom vibes from kook?

Length: longer than JKs Dick career

Additional Content: How So (Part 2)

A/N: have to post it shortened bc the longer version breaks the app :) have some fluff comfort after all that angst psycho shit I posted.

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It's not like Jungkook hates you. He really, honestly, doesn't.

In fact, he admires how honest you are, in a way. You seem comfortable with yourself, which shows in a healthy amount of confidence, no thought wasted on what people might think of your outfit or makeup. You're very expressive and creative, and you always work out solutions whenever everyone else would suggest simply giving up.

You're just.. too bold for him. He's not really interested in most things you discuss- which is often something lewd- and he also doesn't really share any interests with you. You're a miss know-it-all, you get dramatic if you don't get your way, and you manipulate people around you to even out your road ahead. You make demeaning jokes about yourself and you always put yourself down in a comedic manner- and he just doesn't like that. Even so, he still never casts you out, or ignores you. It's odd, because whenever you have one on one interactions, he can't help but feel like you're not the same as with others around. Just like right now.

You're currently all eating at a sushi place - you're sitting across from him, cleavage dangerously exposed, but he's got no right to be offended by it. In a way, he admires the way you seem to be so comfortable. But he can't help but notice the way you keep adjusting your top all the time, tugging and pulling constantly.

If it's making you so fidgety, why wear it? It irritates him a bit. He'll never understand why most girls choose fashion over comfort.

Your best friend Namjoon had told him before that you're actually not like this at all. That you're a great friend, caring and gentle and actually very fragile, and even a little shy and quiet when no one's around - however, Jungkook believes that's just your best friend trying to make you look good. You're totally fine the way you are - you're just too much for him personally. There's nothing wrong with that.

Just because he might not enjoy your personality, doesn't mean you have to change it.

But he doesn't question it, continues to eat and listen in on conversations, laughing along jokes and funny stories. He likes the energy of this. It's unforced, comfortable, easy. He's just about to continue eating, when he notices the glance you throw at his plate, something you've done a couple of times now, seemingly thinking about something, before looking away again, engaging in the conversation as if to distract yourself. "Do you want a piece?" He asks you as soon as there's a good moment, a bit more quiet as to not interrupt the current topic being discussed at the table.

You look at him, wide-eyed just for a second, before you shake your head. "It's fine. I'll maybe try it next time, though." You tell him with a smile. "Does it taste good?" You wonder, and he can't help but be amused. How come you can make straight-up dick-jokes at the dinner table, but you can't accept his offered food that you clearly got your eyes on?

"I don't know if my taste is the same as yours." He shrugs, watching as you chew on the inside of your lip now. "Let's trade, if that makes you feel better." He offers instead, and at that, you visibly perk up, eagerly putting a piece of yours on his plate to receive his.

You're.. kind of cute like this. Oddly so.

He watches without staring too much as you eat his gifted piece of sushi, clearly enjoying the taste of it as you swing your legs under the table a little. "This is good." You comment, making him nod with a smile before you both pay attention to the conversation again.

He doesn't really think much about the whole interaction afterwards.

It's not like it's anything special.

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"Ah, fuck." Namjoon curses, looking at his phone. "God, fuck. Yoongi I'm so sorry, I forgot I was supposed to drive with Y/N to her doctor's appointment today." He apologizes, making Jungkook look up from his phone.

"Is it something bad?" Yoongi asks, genuinely a bit concerned as Namjoon just seems unsure.

"We don't know, just a routine thing."He replies. "But you never know. And she's a little anxious, too. I wouldn't want her taking the bus or anything alone in that state." He explains, and everyone seems to agree that that's not a good idea. You're well known to not possess the most basic orientation skills sometimes - and with your head all over the place like this, it could just end with you getting hurt.

"What if I drive her real quick?" Jungkook offers casually, looking up from his phone from where he sits on the small sofa in Yoongi's studio. "You both can continue working, and I didn't have anything to do anyways." He shrugs.

"You know what, great idea." Yoongi chimes up.

"I'll.. text her. See if she's okay with that." Namjoon offers with a little hesitance, making Jungkook wonder how serious this appointment really is. Did you have any health troubles you'd been hiding? He's always been told to never judge a book by its cover. Maybe you were just putting on a tough mask to cover up what you thought was weakness?

Jungkook doesn't believe in that. You've always been this way ever since he'd met you.

"She said she's fine with it." Namjoon sighs after a moment, making Jungkook lock his phone and get up. "Here, let me at least bring you down." Namjoon offers, walking out the studio and towards the underground garage where Jungkook has his car parked. "Listen- can you do me a favor?" He wonders, and Jungkook nods.

"Sure." He says, opening the driver's door to throw his wallet into the back together with his jacket. "What is it?"

"Listen, it's a.. gynecologists' appointment." Namjoon says, quietly so, while Jungkook just.. stares, unable to quite grasp on why his friend would say it in a way that makes it seem as if the word is something you can't ever say out loud. So you're going to a specialist. So what? "It's her first time there. She's honestly terrified, so, if you could maybe go in with her and sit in the waiting room? Just, to keep her mind off of things." Namjoon carefully says.

Again, Jungkook just shrugs, before nodding. "Sure, no issue." He says, getting into the car. "I'll text you when she's back home then. You go up and help Yoongi." He says, before putting his phone into the holder, maps app opened to find where you're waiting.

He's a bit confused inside the car. With the way you're always talking, he'd been sure you would've been a regular at those places. Not because he thought you were a whore, God no, but he just believed until now that you'd be someone who's open and casual with it.

So why are you terrified of a simple doctor's visit?

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"You uhm.. really don't have to." You mumble quietly next to him, anxiously playing with your hands in your lap. You've been quiet the entire time, not really talking at all, and especially not looking at him. He's a little worried about that, wondering if you're maybe in pain, or really unwell in general to the point of changing your personality like this. "I know this must be weird for you." You say quietly.

"Not really, no. I went to one of these with my mom once, so its fine." He shrugs next to you, trying to maybe soothe your nerves by showing you that he's not at all weirded out or uncomfortable. To be honest, he's a bit surprised- because right now, the girl sitting next to him, isn't at all the girl he'd thought he had figured out.

However, he also assumes you might just be heavily uncomfortable with your health, which could add to you just behaving like you do right now. "You feeling okay? Should I ask them how long it's gonna be?" He asks, and you just shake your head.

"No, I can wait." You just say, trying hard to appear unbothered now. "Guess I'm just not really looking forward to a fifty-plus year-old digging around where the light doesn't reach, you know?" You attempt to joke as always, but Jungkook can spot the fakeness of it.

"Joon said it's your first time." He says, locking his phone now before putting it away.

"Son of a bitch." You curse under your breath, leaning back in your seat with your arms crossed and legs thrown forwards, heels hitting the floor. You look almost defensive now, as if he'd just insulted you. "Yeah, I didn't need to go until now." You shrug. "But my regular physician keeps bugging me to check some stuff out, and Joon has been bothering me about it too." You say. "Not like he's got anything to do with my vagina for that matter."

"Well, he worries." Jungkook shrugs next to you. "And if you've got health issues, you should always get them checked out for that matter. Could be nothing, could be something. I can understand him." He explains to you. "He cares a lot about you."

"hmhm." You affirm quietly, a bit distant now, staring at the tips of your shoes. "Joon has always been a really good friend." You say, and jungkook nods. Namjoon is the main connection between Jungkook and you- the older guy being somewhat of a brother to him, in a way. He really admired his friend a lot, for his achievements as well as his determination to always better himself. He can't deny that he never really quite understood your friendship with him- with you being so extremely different from him- but he never questioned either. "He's honest." You mumble out, and Jungkook has to agree.

"He is." Jungkook nods, though he feels like there's something more to it. He doesn't get to ask however, because your name is suddenly called- and you jump up, taking a deep breath. "Hey-" Jungkook asks, and you look down to where he sits, as he smiles encouragingly. "-You'll be fine." He promises, and you nod, before disappearing with the nurse into the examination room.

It doesn't take too long for you to emerge back out, a prescription written in front as he gets your coat and walks towards you to the counter. "If it gets any worse, just give us a call, alright?" The nurse asks, and you just quietly nod before you walk out with Jungkook trailing right behind you.

"Everything alright?" He asks, and you nod, though next to him in the car, you run your hands over your face.

"I don't ever wanna go there again." You groan, hands still hiding your face as Jungkook looks at you a bit concerned now.

"Did something happen?" He asks seriously, canceling his action of starting the car.

You take down your hands. "No. It was just.. weird." You say. "The questions were nasty. I don't know." You say quietly, and Jungkook can do nothing but start the car to drive you home. He wishes he could- but at the end of the day, this is something he can't and won't ever really understand fully. He hopes it's just the new experience freaking you out.

Parking in front of your apartment building, you really look a bit terrified now. No longer because of the appointment though- but because of the honestly world-ending rain hitting his car like it's trying to smash it flat into the concrete below. "Its really going hard outside now." Jungkook laughs, but you don't seem to be in a joking manner at all. "If you run you won't get wet."

"I don't want you to drive in this weather." You say meekly, barely able to be heard over the loud rain.

"I'll just wait until it's better." He waves off, looking at you drowned in the orange interior light of his car. You seem to think, before you turn to look at him, eyes reflecting the led lights all around like mirrors. You're really pretty, without all that makeup.

"You can come up? Just, it's cold, and if you leave the car running that's bad for the environment and you're also wasting gas-" you ramble, and he laughs, shutting down the car at that, before grabbing his keys.

"Alright." He shrugs. "If you're cool with that." He asks, and you nod after a moment. He chuckles a bit, before grabbing onto the door handle, still looking at you. "On three?" He asks, and your face lights up in playfulness.

"One?" You start, making him grin.

"Two.." he continues, making you smile as well, before you both pull on the handle.

"Three!"

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Your apartment is everything he did not expect.

"Sorry, it's a bit messy.." you say, taking off your shoes before you slip into the pink slippers close by. The coat hooks on the side of the entrance are cat shaped. The mat where the shoes are put is pink. And from what he can see, everything you have is bright, pastel colored, cute.

Almost innocently so.

You're right and wrong with it being messy, he notices as he walks into the apartment. It's small, but cozy- blankets and round plushies littering the couch close by, kitchen sink containing some dishes you didn't wash or didn't put away yet. It is a bit untidy, but not messy, in his eyes.

It just.. looks like his own apartment. Simply alive.

"Do you.. want tea?" You ask, quietly, and he nods as he walks closer to you in the open kitchen. "I.. have a lot of different flavors so.. just choose one you like." You explain, opening a cabinet that's basically all about tea. Different mugs, mostly animal designs, flower shaped coasters, sugar and many different brands and flavors of tea, boxes a bit unaligned. He pulls out a little baggy of the box that's the most empty, making you smile a bit shyly. "I like that one the most." You admit.

"I assumed. Might as well try it then." He shrugs casually, letting you boil the water while he looks around from his spot. "Your apartment is really nice." He comments.

"Thank you." You answer quietly, pouring the water into the two mugs. "Namjoon sometimes sleeps over because, according to him, my pull-out couch is more comfy than his own bed." You joke, and Jungkook laughs.

"That sounds like him." He nods, accepting the mug before you both walk towards said couch. "Granted, he sleeps on a mattress on the floor though." He tells you.

You laugh. "He's way too much of a cheapskate to buy a bedframe." You shake your head. "He could just buy it and pay it off monthly." You say.

"He could. But I guess we'll never know why he refuses to buy one." Jungkook answers, watching as you toe off your slippers to get more comfortable on the couch next to him- before you put the mug back on the small table, jumping up towards the windows, opening them. "Its still raining heavy." He says, and you nod, turning off the lights, streetlights of the city illuminating the room enough to still see, as you walk back on the couch, pulling a blanket over your shoulders. "What're you doing?" He chuckles when you put one over his shoulders as well.

"I like listening to the rain. And it smells nice." You say, wind blowing into the apartment. "And airing out is important too." You tell him, leaning your head against the backrest of the couch. He nods.

This is nice.

He'd never really thought of those aspects of rain, has always just seen it as bad. It's already slowly stopping to rain so hard, now just a soft mist, but you're right. It smells nice, not like the usual faint city smog, but clean, and fresh. The air might be cold, icy on the tip of his nose, but its also refreshing, calming.

"This is nice." He comments before he turns, noticing a bit of weight on his back. You're asleep, resting against his back, and he uses this moment to look at you a bit.

Maybe Namjoon had been right, he thinks as he adjusts you to lay your head on his thigh, tucking your blanket in around you.

Maybe you're not who he thought you were.

♥━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━♥

"What do you mean you were inside her apartment?" Namjoon asks, visibly surprised as he puts down his chopsticks for a moment. "She let you inside?"

"It was raining hard, didn't want to let me drive home, so I had some tea at hers and left later. She fell asleep anyways, she was pretty beat, so I left a note and drove home after closing her windows." Jungkook casually explains, continuing his lunch across his friend.

"You do know she doesn't even let her own mother visit, right?" Namjoon asks, and Jungkook shakes his head.

"No, how would I know?" He says. "From how she acts and speaks, I thought she'd have regular visitors." He says, scooping up some rice as his friend across shakes his head.

"No. She hates visitors. She doesn't even open for the mailman." Namjoon says. "Her apartment is her safety zone. I'm surprised she let you in." He shrugs.

"Maybe you just don't know her that well." Jungkook teases his friend.

"You simply don't know her at all, Jungkook." He says. "Listen.. I, don't know how to say this.. " he starts, and Jungkook raises his brow in confusion.

"I'm not gonna fuck her, if that's what you're worried about." He says, and Namjoon runs a hand over his face.

"Thats.. that wasn't something I was worried about until you mentioned it actually." He mumbles. "So yeah. Don't do that please. And also, don't.. just, don't get too close to her. In general."

"Why?" Jungkook wonders honestly now. "Joon, she's not gonna break my heart or something. I'm an adult man, not a lovesick boy going through puberty. She's not even my type." He laughs.

"Jungkook, I'm serious." The older guy says, picking his chopsticks back up. "Just.. leave it as it is right now."

"What're you worried about?" Jungkook wants to know, finishing his meal as he wipes his hands clean. "You seem so serious about this."

"Because I am." He underlines again. "I told you before, she's not who she pretends she is." He reminds the younger, who leans back, arms crossed.

"What, is she a criminal?" He wonders. "Sells drugs? Owns guns? Criminal record?"

"Theres things I won't tell you cause that's not my right." Namjoon explains. "You're a good guy, I know that, she knows that. But if you get too close, she'll just get attached again." He sighs.

"And?" Jungkook clicks his tongue. "Nothing wrong with that. We're attached too. That's what friendships are. Attachments."

"I meant it as in, more than that." Namjoon mumbles in a somber tone.

"Oh." Jungkook realizes. "I.. don't think I'm her type anyways." He laughs it off, but Namjoon doesn't seem convinced.

"Just.. keep your distance." He warns. "Its for the best."

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Namjoon doesn't tell him anything about you since that day.

You don't seem to hang out with everybody as much, and he himself hasn't seen you in what's been weeks now. Everytime he checks on you via your best friend, all he gets is a short answer that's way too vague to be the actual truth. Jungkook isn't sure why he's so interested in the first place. Maybe it's that small tiny glimpse of you that you've shown him, let him taste, before disappearing from his radar.

It bothers him, mainly because he feels like Namjoon has made him out to be the bad guy that's going to break your heart it seems. He's never given a clear reason why. He's never done anything wrong.

But its not like you've vanished into thin air, and because of pure luck, he spots you in a store he's visiting quite often, crouched down at the plushy-section. He almost didn't recognize you, pastel pink bucket hat and facemask hiding you pretty well- but for some reason, he still somehow knows it's you.

You seem to struggle between buying one or the other, holding both as you glance from one of the plush toys to the other.

"Tough decision, hm?" He asks, careful not to startle you but he still does, the seemingly sudden attack of his voice sending you straight onto your butt from your squatting position. "Sorry, I didn't mean to spook you like that." He chuckles, helping you up and standing.

"No worries. I didn't pay attention." You say, while you hold onto the still packaged stuffed animals. "And uh.. yeah. I was thinking of taking, you know, maybe one." You mumble more or less. "Both are too expensive."

"Yeah, they price these pretty high in my opinion." He affirms, poking one of the plastic bags you're holding. "What's so special about these?" He wonders, and your eyes suddenly grow bigger, hands squishing the thing eagerly.

"They're squishy, and soft!" You explain to him eagerly. "Try it! They're like, I don't know, stress balls or something!" You say, and he does as you say, pulling and pressing down on the round purple creature.

"Hm yeah okay, I can see where you're coming from." He nods, charmed by your cute enthusiasm over the toy. "So, which one you taking?"

"I.. like the color of this one, and its a shark, but the other one is a chicken and cute too.. like, look at those little wings.." you complain, pulling on said wings a bit before you look down. "I don't know."

"Why not buy both and just.. skip out on buying any next month?" He wonders. "Treat yourself. For being brave at the doc's." He chuckles, and you start to fidget on the spot a little.

"They're too expensive." You reason. "If I buy both, I won't have enough money to buy proper groceries next week, and Joon has been bugging me about not eating frozen foods all the time.." you complain.

"Well, he's right, that's not exactly healthy." Jungkook agrees, before taking the chicken from you and turning it to see the price tag. "Its alright. Let me buy it then." He shrugs.

"You- no, you really don't have to." You say.

"I know." He smiles. "But I want to."

You don't say anything. You're not sure Jungkook is aware of what he's doing, supporting your bad habit of buying 'kid's stuff' as Namjoon scolds you constantly. Walking towards checkout, you can't help but wonder. "Did you and Joon fight?" You ask, and Jungkook shrugs.

"Not sure, honestly." He admits. "He's.. I guess he doesn't trust me with you."

"What does you mean?" You wonder in a serious manner, careful to make sure the line keeps moving as you walk next to him towards the cash registers.

"Thats what I'm wondering." He says. "Namjoon seems pretty protective over you. I don't know, usually I'd say he's got the hots for you, but he's with Jin, so that can't be the reason." He tells you, before walking closer to the busy cashier.

"As if anyone's got the hots for me but fourty-plus year old men." You scoff.

"Hey now, don't do that." He clicks his tongue. "I bet most guys are just- intimidated by you. You know." He shrugs, waiting in line next to you with the round chicken plush tucked under his arm. "I know I was."

"Was?" You wonder, and he laughs down at you, his smile almost blinding.

"Yeah, definitely past tense." He jokes. "Now I just think you're cute."

You want to question that further. Suddenly, it's your turn, but Jungkook walks right behind you, pulls out his credit card way before you can grab your wallet, pays for both the stuffed animals and walks you out the store.

"How'd you get here?" He wonders, as you both walk outside.

"Bus." You answer, and he nods.

"You want me to drive you home?" He asks. "I don't mind, it's on the way for me."

"Jungkook.." you suddenly say, voice trembling a little as you stand in front of him at the side of the parking lot. "I.. appreciate your kindness but, uhm.. please don't." You say, and he's a bit taken aback by it.

"Did I do something wrong?" He wonders. "If I came off too strong, I apologize. Really didn't mean to."

"Its just that.. I'm kind of tired getting friendzoned." You laugh bitterly. "Its kind of old at this point. Seeing everyone be nice to you and then move on once they've found their special someone."

"Thats.." he starts, brows all scrunched up as he stands in front of you. "You're not some part-time activity." He explains honestly to you. "I'm not being nice to you to fight my boredom or anything like that. And you're definitely not friendzoned." He chuckles a little.

"I'm always friendzoned." You scoff. "I'm just everyone's little sister, or the lewd one that's always up for a random call when the date doesn't show up." You argue.

"Well, here's the thing." Jungkook tells you, gently uncrossing your arms before placing the two round plushies in each, respectively. "I really don't care what's made you build up that tough mean-girl persona you've created. But I'd like to get to know the girl that's looking at me right now, just like this." He grins, tapping the underside of your chin teasingly. "You're teasing me with those glimpses of you every now and then. I want to know more, if you'd let me."

"That 'me' is boring." You say. "She's childish."

"I've thrown a tamper tantrum before." He shrugs.

"She's stupid." You tell him, but he shakes his head.

"I doubt that. We all got brain-farts every now and then." He crosses his arms, amused smirk on his face at your attempts to drive him away.

"She's cries over Disney movies." You try, and he laughs.

"Hey come on, everyone cries over the fox and the hound!" He simply defends, and you sigh, almost annoyed.

"Jungkook you say all that right now as if it won't end with me hopelessly falling in love with you, while you're gonna leave me behind because 'you're sorry but you've met someone and you're a great friend but nothing more'!" You complain.

"You won't even try and let me love you." He softly says, and you're a little shocked at how easy he says the for you dreaded 'L'-word. It's a big word. A heavy one. "I can't stand here and promise you that I'll fall in love with you, because first and foremost, I don't know you. And you don't know me either." He explains. "But that's something we can change. You just have to let me in."

"And you don't have to let me in?" You try and jab at him, making him laugh.

"I don't have to let you in." He simply says. "You've been seeing who I am the whole time. I'm not hiding anything." He shrugs.

"..." you pull the two stuffed animals a bit closer to yourself, plastic crinkling in your arms before you speak. "What if you don't like who I am?" You wonder quietly.

"Then at least we tried." He offers. "Life is scary. Meeting new people is scary. Letting people go is scary." He softly explains. "But if you just hide away from those things, you'll also miss out on opportunities to experience something great. Meet someone special. Or create a memory you'll never forget."

"So you're saying you already know you won't like me?" You say, now just being stubborn to see what he does.

"Stop putting words into my mouth you brat." Be laughs. "I don't like the 'you' that you force yourself to be. I know that for sure." Jungkook tells you, grabbing his car keys from his pant pocket. "But I feel like I'm gonna like this you that's right in front of me right now a lot."

He speaks bold, appears honest. You're still not sure if you trust him. And namjoon had told you to really keep him at distance, stay on high alert of anything.

But somehow, he's caught you, sticky like honey already staining your skin.

And you've always had a sweet tooth.

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It kind of feels like sneaking around.

Even though right now, you're doing nothing naughty at all, not even remotely. Jungkook is simply helping you cook, watches the pizza in the oven before he puts the mitts to the side. "You got a timer set?" He wonders, and you nod.

"I've got it to the full time for now, let's hope we don't forget the check every now and then." You say, and he nods, walking into the living room with you. The smell of food is already slowly invading your space, and you open a window to make sure it airs out before you'll go to bed later.

He's staying over. You're surprisingly calm about it.

On the couch, he's looking at you from the side. "What?" You wonder, and he shrugs.

"I'm just wondering." He says. "Why do you act so differently around others?"

"Because everyone walks over you when you're soft." You explain, pulling your legs closer to yourself next to him. "No one takes you seriously. You're just the quiet girl and nothing interesting. No one cares." You mumble.

Jungkook wants to tell you that's not true, but he knows that he'd be wrong. It's sad that soft hearts get put in a hard shell because of what most people think should be an admirable personality. Someone strong doesn't have to be someone who's always bold and loud.

When his fingers find your knee, you stiffen. It makes him question out loud what he's been having on the tip of his tongue for a while now, ever since arriving at your place. "Am I making you uncomfortable?" He wonders, and you shake your head- before shrugging, unsure. "You're a bit confusing. In a way, cause you seem like you want me close, but when I am, you start to look all cornered, just like now." He wonders.

"Yeah well.. when a guy touches me, it's always been just for that." You say. "You know. Sex."

His face becomes serious. You notice quickly how that sounded.

"Nothing bad ever happened! Not really." You admit. "But it's.. I guess I should've told you right from the start. So you won't get your hopes up." You sigh. "I don't.. want to have sex."

"Okay." He says. "Neither do I right now. I just want to touch you. Nothing else."

"Yeah no, I mean it as in- not right now, probably not anytime soon, maybe never?" You ask more or less. "I've.. never had sex before. And at this point it feels like I've just passed all the opportunities to have it with anybody."

"Do you dislike the thought of it?" He wonders. "What's making you uncomfortable about it?"

"I.. guess I'm scared it'll be awkward?" You say, wiggling your feet a bit. "What if I don't like something, for example? Or if I make a weird sound, or, I don't know, don't cum or you don't cum and then it's all wasted time and just awkward.." you try and explain.

"You're intimidated by it." He sums it up for you, and you nod. "Thats fine. First's are scary, no matter what kind."

"I'm an adult." You conquer. He laughs.

"I'm one too, and I'm still freaked out by shit!" He laughs. "But, to get back to the topic, I'm okay with that."

"Okay with not having sex?" You wonder, and he nods.

"I mean, I get it's important for most people, and I like the intimacy of it, yeah. But it's not a necessity." He shrugs. "I can jerk myself off just fine."

You deflate a little, both because you feel more calm now, but also because you don't know how to tell him you might be interested in the entire topic. But it seems like he can read minds.

"We can also, you know, ease into it." He offers. "Doesn't have to be all hard-core bondage first time." Jungkook laughs. "You okay with this whole discussion?" He gently asks, and you nod.

You're weirdly alright with it.

"So let's like- what do you like?" He wonders. "As in, when you masturbate, what's something you enjoy?"

You cringe a bit. He laughs. You're cute.

"I.. uh.." you stammer, voice a lot more quiet now. "I've got like, a vibrator? That's nice." You shrug. "Other than that, uhm, just my hand. You know. Basic stuff."

Jungkook nods. "Ever put something in?"

"It.. uh. Dunno. Never really came from it alone." You say. "Which is also why I think sex with me is gonna be weird because I've never really gotten myself off on just that." You say.

"Doesn't mean anything." He shakes his head. "The mood, foreplay, all of that makes a huge difference. That and the fact that someone else is doing it. I remember my first handjob I got. It was weird as fuck, even though technically I should've been used to it." He laughs. "I think what personally scared me most was just being naked I guess." He offers some past fears of his own.

You nod at that. "Same."

"You're pretty tough." He smiles. "I'm not just saying that. I think you're pretty, with clothes and without as well." He flirts.

"I'm still not having sex with you." You defend yourself, and he shrugs, smiling still.

"I know." He tells you. "I'm still fine with that."

It's quiet for a moment, until you speak up again. You're not sure why you're bringing it up again when you could've just let it go, because clearly you've always been against the idea of having sex with someone. But with Jungkook, for some reason, it's so easy to talk about all of this.

"I.. you said you'd ease into it " you mumble quietly. He nods. "How?"

"I could just jerk you off." He shrugs. "Simple hand job. Clothes can stay on."

"And then?" You wonder.

"Then what?" He chuckles. "The you'll know if you like someone else doing something like that for you." He offers.

"What if I'll fall in love with you then?" You quietly ask, and he impishly smiles.

"Then I've done one he'll of a good job." He jokes, before looking at you more seriously. "In all seriousness though. I wouldn't mind you falling in love with me."

"I can tell." You say, looking away. "You're easy to love."

"Thank you." He offers. "You're very easy to fall in love with too."

"That makes no sense." You roll your eyes. "Love and lust aren't the same. You just want to screw me."

"Do I?" He raises his brows. "Can't lie and say you're not physically attractive to me. But I stand by what I said. If you don't want sex, I won't ask for it."

"You'll just end up leaving me for someone who wants it." You bitterly laugh. He doesn't look happy.

"No." He says. "Okay, do you want be with me? Emotionally, I mean?" He asks you, and you look at him wide eyes. "Yes, I'm asking you out here."

"I-" you stammer, caught off guard. "Yeah?"

"Is that a question or an answer?" He teases, making you whine.

"Maybe? Yes?" You try again, but he just shakes his head.

"Alright." He simply answers. "I'll go look, see if the pizza is burned yet. You calm down, I think I've riled you up enough." He laughs, hand on your shoulder for just a second before he leaves you to yourself, giving you some breathing room.

It gives you time to think.

You like him. He's a nice guy, good looking too, and he seems honest about his intentions. You don't love him yet, but its clear that he's easy to fall in love with. But isn't love a requirement to start a relationship? Can you just get together and then fall in love?

You're not sure. But you also want to find out.

So when he emerges from your kitchen, you call out to him. "I want to." You say, and he looks at you wide eyed for just a moment, before he seems to realize what you're talking about. "I.. wanna be with you." You say.

And he smiles, grins brightly, like a kid just being offered a trip to Disney world.

"Okay."

♥━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━♥

"Everything alright?" He chuckles, voice breaking the silence in the darkened living room. "I can hear you creeping around."

It's true, you've been trying to keep quiet because you really don't know how to ask this. It's been bugging you for hours now, there's no way it seems you'll be able to fall asleep without at least attempting to solve this issue. But how do you ask for it?

He'd asked you out. You're together now, right?

"I- uh.." you wonder quietly, navigating slowly towards the pull-out couch where he's laying on. "Just wanted to see if everything's alright." You chicken out last moment, and he laughs softly.

"I'm alive and well." He answers you, before he throws back one side of the blankets, patting the spot next to him. "You wanna sleep here?" He wonders, and you sigh.

"How come you know that?" You almost whine, walking closer before you crawl underneath the warmed up blankets he'd been resting under. "Thanks." You say, but he shakes his head.

"No problem. You can come closer, too." He tells you more quietly now that you're already laying next to him.

It takes a moment for you. You're not sure how close you want to get, how close he will let you- so you slowly scoot forwards, inching closer like a scared animal before you finally settle with your head on the inside of his shoulder, arm over his middle. "Is that okay?" You wonder. He nods.

"Definitely." He answers. "Do you cuddle a lot?" He wonders, and you shake your head.

"I've not.. cuddled with anybody since I was a child." You admit. "So I.. jungkook, I'm gonna need a lot of help for this." You confess quietly. "I don't know how this works. How I'm supposed to act, what I'm supposed to do. I don't know what's right and what's not."

"Thats fine." He reassures you.

It's a little silent after that. You don't know what to say, how to ask. Isn't it weird now? Won't you move too fast? "What's going on in there." He teases, finger flicking your head rather gently. You move around a little uncomfortably. He notices right away. "Not good? You can go back to your bed if it's not comfortable." He offers.

"I don't know.." you say, unsure how to put it in words. "..I'm still thinking about what you said. Earlier." You mumble.

"What exactly?" He wonders quietly.

"The uhm.. you know. Sex part." You stammer out.

"I really don't need it." He chuckles. "Might be hard to grasp but if you don't want it I won't bother you with it."

"I want to." You say. It's dead quiet for a moment before you continue. "Like.. how you said. You know, start small, and all that." Tou explain.

"Okay." He answers after a moment. "Right now?" He asks. You nod.

"I just.. don't know what to do. And I didn't shave- oh God okay no maybe some other day then-" you ramble, he laughs.

"Who cares if you shave?" He jokes easily. "Its fine by me. I don't mind it." He tells you.

"You're weird." You cringe a bit. "Guys don't like that-"

"Maybe you've just met idiots then." He shrugs. "I'm honest here. I don't care if you shave or not. You could dye that hair downstairs pink, who am I to tell you what your body has to look like?" He scoffs playfully, making you laugh a little.

This is why you like him. He's easy. Simple. Comfortable.

"Do you want me to use something? Or just my hand?" He wonders quietly, and you just shrug.

"I wanna.. you know. Know if I like what you do." You offer, and he hums an affirmative reply at that, hand under the covers feeling for your thigh.

"You can stop me at any time." He almost whispers. "It won't be awkward, I promise." He assures, and you nod, letting his palm explore under the covers. You're not sure if he's careful or just plain teasing- but most of all, it's strangely exciting.

He moves you a bit, pulls you closer, eyes searching for ant signs of discomfort. "Jungkook..?" You ask quietly, and he chuckles a bit before nodding. "..can you uhm.. maybe kiss me?" You wonder, and there's no reaction for a moment, until he moves again, adjusts himself so he can properly angle himself, lips meeting yours carefully so.

The first one feels weird. You're unsure. You lift your head in a moment if bravery to try again, and it gets more comfortable.

It's nice.

He seems amused, but not at you - more at the fact that you're a lot more independent than you might've thought you'd be in a situation like this.

You're leading him. You're probably not aware, but your body language and responses all speak clearly to him about what you enjoy and what you don't. At first, he stops any advances, but you whine for him to continue. "Just.. cold hands."

"Sorry." He chuckles. "My fingers are pretty cold sometimes." He jokes. You nod, breathing a bit heavier now as soon as his hands warm up, slowly traveling underneath your underwear, middle finger easily finding your most sensitive spot. "Feeling good?" He wonders, and you nod, squirming around a bit.

"More." You ask, moving around a little, seemingly unsure where to put your limbs. He's doing it very differently from how you'd do it- but it's nice. He's making you feel good, not just in lust, but also in general.

There really isn't anything weird about it.

Or maybe your brain is just a bit foggy.

You want to stop him suddenly, feeling too sensitive, and he does halter his movements to check in with you. "What's wrong?" He asks.

"Weird. Sensitive- I.. don't know." You say. "I feel like I'm gonna pee or something." You say.

"Have you ever had an orgasm before?" He wonders, and you suddenly think. Have you? You're not sure.

"I.. don't know." You say.

"Hm." He cocks his head to the side a little, amused look on his face. "Lets see then." He almost challenges, resuming his activities, making you squirm yet again as you feel like something might be happening. Your back arches, and suddenly, you're not sure why you can't help but gasp out, his movements perfectly stable as pleasure rolls over you in waves. "There we go." He laughs, watching as you slowly come back down.

"Thank you.." you say breathlessly, before cringing at the sight of his glistening hand. "Uhm.. do you want me to do something too.?"

"It's okay." He says. "I've enjoyed watching you. That's enough." Jungkook chuckles, before pulling back the covers. "No, clean up. I gotta wash my hand and change too." He laughs, slapping your thigh with his clean hand.

"Change?" You wonder, standing up and cringing at the slippery feeling between your legs.

"I told you." He laughs, and only now do you notice a wet spot on his sweatpants as he'd turned on the lights. "I really enjoyed myself as well."

♥━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━♥

He's warm.

His arm lays heavy over your body, breathing soft and barely noticeable on the skin of your neck. Jungkook has slept close to you the entire night, didn't mind when you stole the blanket from him it seems. He's holding onto you, face clear of any worry, no muscle tensed as he sleeps.

He slowly seems to wake up, pulls you closer for a moment as he stretches his limbs and back, before his tired eyes open. "Hey." He greets with a raspy voice.

"Hey." You quietly greet back. He chuckles.

"How do you feel?" He wonders, pulling you closer with a sleepy grin.

"Good. Happy." You say.

"In love?" He wonders.

You nod.

And he smiles, brighter than the sun already high up in the sky outside your window.

♥━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━♥

#bts imagine #bts fanfic #bts fic #jungkook imagine #jungkook fluff

[pinguwrites]

Cillian meets a fan (not the crazy kind, just someone who appreciates his movies) who has a boyfriend, but it doesn’t stop him from flirting with her because he thinks her stuttering and blushes are cute, plus he’s determined to have her.

Bro if Cillian did that to me I would fold instantly

Drabble: your favorite actor flirts with you

Pairing -> (hints of) cillian murphy x reader

Warnings: cillian being a little pushy, hints of emotional cheating sort of cause reader has a boyfriend

Disclaimer: This is not a reflection of Cillian Murphy's actual life. This is completely separate and is not intended to harm him or his family in any way. DNI if you're a Yvonne hater. This is only fanfiction and this is just for fun.

"I absolutely loved this," you said softly, motioning to leave, despite every instinct of yours telling you to stay. You were sure he could see it on your face, but, priorities first, and you really did have to get home. "But I gotta go. My boyfriend's waiting for me back home and, well," you gave a nervous chuckle, "I promised I would run some errands and it's practically night out, so . . ."

Cillian Murphy, the Cillian Murphy, a fact you could hardly believe, just laughed. "No, don't go. I'm sure whoever your boyfriend is will understand," he said, with a dissmisive wave of his hand. “I’ve enjoyed this evening together.”

You did, too. You were on your way to the supermarket when you noticed him getting out of his car. Your blood had pumped with excitement once you realized who it was, but you kept calm. That was, until he called you over and asked you to help him with his bags.

After a quick conversation and thanks, you revealed to Cillian that you were actually a fan, and that you just loved his movies. You hoped you hadn’t come off as obsessive, you knew how some people could get, and you didn’t want to push any boundaries. To your relief, he just smiled and asked you to sit down with him on the nearby picnic bench, to which you engaged in length discussions about work and family and simple getting-to-know-you talks.

“I have as well,” you said, trying not to look into his eyes. “But I really need to go. It’s been a pleasure meeting you, Mr. Murphy—”

“—Cillian,” he corrected.

“Cillian. It’s been a pleasure,” you repeated.

Cillian rubbed his fingers over his lips, as if in thought. Then, he grabbed his phone and handed it to you. “Put your number in. I’ll call you, and we can set up a date.”

You unconsciously bit your lower lip, but did as he asked. “You’d want to do that? With me?”

“Why not? You’re my age, funny, intelligent . . . attractive.”

You were surely going to faint. Cillian Murphy had just called you attractive. If you didn’t have a boyfriend you would have leapt into his arms and put a ring on it.

But you did, you reminded yourself. And he was probably waiting for you back at home. You were sure he wouldn’t mind your brief encounter with your celebrity crush.

“A-attractive?” you stuttered. You didn’t want to sound like you had low confidence. “Yeah, I mean. Thank you. You’re attractive, too — genuinely. Like, you’re gorgeous, actually.”

You winced at your choice of wording. Why did you have to be so awkward?

Cillian chuckled and leaned in closer. “You’re cute when you’re all flustered. You shuffle your body and part your lips. Did you notice that?”

You hadn’t noticed.

“I, um . . .”

“See, you’re doing it now.” He glanced down at your lips for a moment, then relented. “Alright, alright. I’ll let you go. I’ll be in touch soon.”

You nodded, grateful. You were sure if Cillian had pushed a little harder, he would have convinced you to stay — which wasn’t something you should be doing.

“Have a nice day, Cillian. I look forward to seeing you again.”

You both got into your cars and drove off in opposite directions, though you did look back, just briefly, with longing. The thought that you could get to know him even better made you so happy. He was just a person, but you were sure he’d be as sweet and lovely as he’d been so far.

You finally pulled into your driveway, but before you could get out your phone buzzed. Heart beating in anticipation, you picked it up and read the text:

Unknown: It’s Cillian. How about lunch next Saturday? I’ll pick you up at twelve.

You hesitated. You didn’t want to make it seem like you were interested in anything more, given your current situation, but, well, it was only just lunch. Like friends get all the time. There was no harm in that . . . right?

Taglist:

@henrywintersdearestgirl @shroombloom-rry @meetmeatyourworst @nela-cutie @madnessandobsession @mrkdvidal1989 @bernelflo @slut4thebroken @qqquartz7

#cillian murphy #cillian murphy x reader #cillian murphy x you #cillian murphy x y/n #fanfiction #pinguwrites

[sunny44]

Marriage (Part 5)

Pairing: Max Verstappen x ex fiancée!reader Mason Mount x Fiancée!reader

Warnings: discussions

Summary: Max leaves his fiancée y/n at the altar on their wedding day but after years of regretting what he did, by a miracle of fate (or Lando) she appears in his life again.

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

The next morning, Mason and I woke up to the excitement outside our hotel window. The Formula 1 race day had arrived, and despite the lingering tension from the day before, there was an atmosphere of anticipation.

As we headed to the racetrack, a mix of emotions overwhelmed me. Memories of my past with Max and the recent revelation to Mason weighed on me. However, Mason's reassuring presence beside me provided a sense of comfort.

The atmosphere on the track was electrifying, with the roar of engines and cheers from enthusiastic fans. Mason's enthusiasm was contagious, and I found myself caught up in the excitement of the event. We settled into our seats inside the Red Bull garage, ready to witness the thrilling race.

As the cars zoomed around the track, I tried to focus on the present moment and enjoy the experience with Mason. Despite the challenges and the unexpected encounter with Max, being there with Mason felt right.

Mason and I hadn't discussed the matter further, and perhaps when we return home, it will come up. I'm unsure about the possible questions he might ask and how I'll respond.

After the race, we joined the celebrations in the paddock. Mason's smile was infectious, and I couldn't help but thank him for making this weekend special for both of us.

In the midst of the jubilant atmosphere, Max approached us.

"Hi, what did you think of the race?"

"Good," Mason replied without much enthusiasm.

"I'm glad I could put on a show for you to watch," Max said, not understanding why Mason seemed distant.

"I know how much you like to put on a show."

"Mase," I called him, squeezing his hand lightly.

"I don't get it," Max said, confused.

"I don't know if I want to punch you for hurting her or thank you for doing it, or else I wouldn't have met the best person in the world," Mason said. Max realized he was talking about us.

"I didn't know you knew."

"That doesn't matter, but you're a complete idiot."

"I already know that, don't need you to remind me," he said, and I heard the bitterness in his voice. "I'm sorry for causing any discomfort. Didn't mean to ruin your weekend," Max said, looking directly at me.

Sensing the tension, Mason took a step forward, putting a protective arm around me.

"Let's focus on the celebration, Max. We're here to enjoy your victory." Max nodded, acknowledging the unspoken boundaries.

"Congratulations on the engagement," he added before stepping away.

“Why did you do that?” I say, letting go of his hand.

“What are you talking about?”

“Why confront him?”

“Are you defending him? After everything he put you through?”

“I'm not defending him, but I don't need more eyes on me because of this story, and then you decide to confront him about it in the middle of the paddock? Where everyone knows who he is.” I say angrily, and Mason tries to come closer, but I move away. “I just can't believe you did something that could have exposed a part of my life that I didn't want to happen.”

"Love, I..." I just shake my head and start walking alone to another place.

I found a corner between two garages where almost no one passed, and I sat there. I hadn't realized I was crying until someone sat next to me and hugged me.

"I was almost sure I saw you, but I thought maybe I was hallucinating." I looked to the side and saw Lando sitting there.

"Hi." He smiles slightly.

"Why are you here alone? Mason was looking for you."

"I just needed a few minutes alone."

"What happened?"

"Mason and Max." He sighs. "It's just that everything is too complicated."

"How so?"

"Mason found out about Max and me, and when Max came to talk to us today after the race, Mason lost his temper and started saying some things to Max." I sighed. "He wasn't wrong, but he made a scene in front of many people, and I already have a lot of eyes on me for being his fiancée, and I don't need more people judging me for what happened between me and Max since it's not something many people know."

"I'm so sorry," he says, pulling me into a hug. "Do you want me to do something?"

"No, but thank you for being here." I feel him leave a kiss on my forehead, and after a few minutes, he has to leave.

I stayed there a little longer and sent a message to Mason saying that I was fine and that we would meet at the hotel.

Bonus scene!

Masonmount instagram stories

“F1 Sunday with my lover” tagged: Yourusername

Taglist: @ironmaiden1313 @dudenhaaa27 @christianpulisic10 @gaslysainz @fanboyluvr @urgirlceci @justdreamersdream @aundercoverosh @newlifeforus @depressedriches @topguncultleader @123beautifulgirl123 @luvrrish @ @tyna-19 @esposadomd

#f1 imagine #f1 fanfic #f1 x you #f1 #f1 instagram au #max verstappen headcanons #max verstappen x reader #max verstappen wallpaper #max verstappen one shot #max verstappen icons #max verstappen headers #max verstappen f1 #max verstappen imagine #max verstappen fanfic #max verstappen smut #max verstappen #max verstappen x you #max verstappen fluff #max verstappen angst #mason mount fanfic #mason mount x oc #mason mount x you #mason mount x reader #mason mount x y/n #charles leclerc #mason mount angst #mason mount fluff #mason mount smut

[lo-fi-charming]

so i've been keeping up with TMP as it's airing, which has been fun, it's actually really nice to experience this kind of story weekly since i came into TMA late and listened up to the s4 finale in like, a month or two. i've been enjoying the new characters and statements, and while i was worried i'd have trouble actively listening (my attention span/executive functioning can be really variable when it comes to podcasts), it's been surprisingly easy for me to actually listen to each new ep the day it drops publicly

all this to say im enjoying the show! but i've found myself feeling increasingly frustrated with a couple things i keep seeing when it comes to discussions of it

to me, it seems... there's been a pervasive reluctance to take TMP as what it is. and i do understand that. it'd be stupid to pretend TMP doesn't exist exclusively because of TMA and that show's success, that it's a successor that was pitched as being similar. it's a story being written by the same people (plus guests), in the same universe (roughly), going for about the same tone and maybe themes.

i just feel like it's a bit of a shame, though, that so many folks seem unwilling not to carry TMA with them when they're engaging with TMP

i don't know where or when it was said, but i swear there was a comment made by jonny and/or alex about how TMP will have some commonality with TMA in terms of world-building, but also, people who listened to TMA first may find themselves theorizing in the wrong direction because we're judging things based off what is no longer concrete, reliable information; things are going to work differently in the world of TMP, and since we have preconceived notions on what is relevant or how things work, that's going to influence how we engage with information presented in TMP if we let it. and that's not even considering the fact that they've been explicit in conveying the idea that TMP was written so you can experience it fully without having listened to any of TMA at all!

i'm very much someone who tries to engage with media on its own terms, largely taking things at face value until i'm given reason to suspect otherwise. that's something i'm trying my best to still do with TMP, even though obviously, i've also listened to TMA and am basing some of my thoughts and personal theories on what we know from that

but that's what i mean to say i guess, it's something you have to actively choose to do. and it feels like, just based on what i've been seeing in fandom spaces, that a lot of people are having a bit of an odd time with TMP because of a reluctance to do that?

i think the easiest way to explain what i mean is to point to a general acceptance, already on the level of fanon it seems, to interpret the computer voices as Our Jon and Martin (+ Jonah/Elias, maybe). now obviously we have the actual real world reason why their voices are present in TMP, because of course jonny and alex were going to come back as voices in the show in some way. and i 100% agree it's a perfectly logical conclusion to then interpret their inclusion as being related to Jon and Martin somehow. i'm personally very into the theory that it is in no way them - not in any way that matters - but specifically their voices that have been stolen (by the Web?) as a means to help spread fears in other realities. but that's really not how i've been seeing people play with the concept? it seems largely 1:1. and again, i totally understand where people are coming from with that - especially when you consider how it can be a super fun concept for horror and angst, or even just the fact that folks want an excuse to carry their favorite characters into this new show and still play around with them. i promise i don't mean to bring this up as a means of making anyone feel bad or like, chastised for interpreting things a certain way and playing in the space!

it's the biggest example of what i mean though, and was a huge point of frustration for me when we were first being presented with TMP. it's not just that i don't want the voices to be Jon and Martin proper (i am very into their Ambiguous End, i believe it's best to leave that as a space for fans to play in); in all honesty, i think it's kind of a shame and maybe even a bit boring (im sorry!) to be engaging with TMP this way

and it's not just stuff like that - i've been seeing a fair amount of people expressing frustration and feeling disappointed with how TMP is hitting, but i mean, i feel like that's inevitable when you're going into it expecting More TMA? i saw at least one person basically say "ive been waiting for it to make me feel the way TMA made me feel, and it hasn't yet", and i really just feel like that's setting yourself up to be dissatisfied! beyond the fact that we're only 5 episodes in and the story has barely gotten a chance to happen yet, a huge element of this new show is that it's being approached as a largely collaborative effort, it seems, with lots of guests coming in to help shape the story and more writing and plotting influence that isn't jonny

obviously it's fine to not be super into that! undoubtedly it's a question of taste. but you do have to acknowledge that that's the case and adjust your expectations accordingly, or else you're not going to have a great time

i really like TMA, i had a great time with it, but even if TMP is a sequel to its parent podcast, it's not the same thing - and personally, i don't want it to be! i do hope that's a sentiment that is able to be more widely felt by some fans as we gain more distance from TMA while TMP is airing. i just think more people would be able to enjoy it that way, and come up with more interesting theories and interpretations of things! but those are really just my own personal thoughts

#endlesschatter #tmagp #i just needed to express some of this #it's a bit tricky tho esp with the voices as jmart thing bc a lot of my buddies and pals are playing in that space #and i hate to sound like im vagueing or complaining i swear im not ;lskdjfljk it is truly so unserious in the end #it's just very much not my interpretation or desire to see canonized in any way #though i cant deny some of the arguments made in favor of that interpretation are compelling #and i mean if it's the case in canon! not like im gonna be mad at folks for calling it!! #might not be my favorite angle but could still be plenty fun! #but also yes yeah i just wrote a lot of words down just to say i think it might be nice. if. #the fandom at large didn't try putting a coat of TMA paint over TMP and interpreting everything that happens in a TMA-colored lens

[kittarts]

Hey. I’m a trans nonbinary person who is a HP fan, and thanks for being transparent and acknowledging that JKR sucks while also still holding a space in your heart for what HP was to you in your youth. It feels so difficult to find people like that online? The common consensus has become to condemn entirely and while that’s understandable, there are people who still love this series because it helped them through tough times and made them feel less alone. I think that’s worth noticing. Not everyone who still likes HP is automatically transphobic, nor are they someone who condones JKR’s awfulness on the many other things she unfortunately has an opinion about, and it seems like people forget you can separate the art from the artist—yes, even if said artist is still alive and kicking. Sorry if this ask is a lot. I don’t mean to start or engage in discourse. I just wanted to thank you, so again, thank you. Love your art.

I really appreciate you sharing your feelings on it! :) you’re not the first one to send me something similar actually. 

Social media really shrunk my worldview, and it wasn’t until I started having these conversations outside of the internet that I realised those condemning others are actually the smaller majority haha. They’re just loud, and therefore they’re scary. 

I can go to a friends house right now and have this discussion without fear of them hurting me. 

I think it’s important for people to be given the space to decide how they feel about these things. To set their own boundaries.

To be an adult and say “Jk did this. And I’m not okay with it. Therefore I won’t be consuming any more Harry Potter” or to say “Jk did this. And I’m not okay with it. But I grew up with these films and they’ll always mean a-lot to me”. These two things can co exist, and neither side is evil lol. It’s literally just about deciding what is and isn’t okay for you. 

Adding on; I'm referring to enjoying the films from your youth, don't financially support her in any capacity. I would like to think this goes without saying, but just to make sure.

#Kittchats #Calling trans and other lgbt folk transphobic for referencing HP or saying they loved the movies is insaneee and I’m not normalising that.

[tc-doherty]

Hey! In your practical writing tips - post you said novels require lots of telling. I've noticed this too when I read, amazing books that tell a lot vs. showing but all advice gears to show and that's what I've been learning to do. Since I can't find anyone that teaches when to tell vs. show and how much tell vs. show is right and why telling is good etc. I was wondering if you could elaborate on this? Why some books that tell a lot are very engaging and others can't keep my attention? I'm so interested to see your thoughts! Thank you.

Like I said in that post, teaching people how to write isn't really my jam so this is less a teaching guide and more just my assorted thoughts on the subject based on my own opinions and the habits that I follow.

I guess what it boils down to is this. You can't really say that either showing or telling is more important in a novel, but the things that you show are perhaps more relevant.

For example, if you describe the morning routine of your character in great detail every single morning, readers are going to get bored. The story will grind to a halt. Yes you're showing us that, which most people would say is a good thing based on "show don't tell", but the information isn't relevant. If you're setting up a fantasy or sci-fi story it might be relevant once or even twice to show us how things work, but not every single time.

Similarly, if your character gets news telling them that someone they love has perished, you don't want to simply say that it made them sad. You want to show us their reaction. What do they do? What do they say? What physical sensations do they have? Are they lightheaded, do they feel out of breath, does their throat hurt because they're trying not to cry? That information is all relevant to the character, the scene, and the reader. If you simply say they're sad, then your story feels too shallow.

Many people might consider dialogue a kind of telling, but really it's both. What the characters say, how they say it, and also what they don't say can show us a lot about who they are as a person, which is relevant information to the audience even if they're simply explaining something that would be considered exposition. But what do your characters actually need to say or hear? And what can you relay to us through something happening in the background, for instance?

And what about the genre? I like to write road trip novels, which means I spend a lot of time showing the minutiae of the journey. That's relevant because the story is the journey that's being taken. But sometimes your characters just have to get from one place to another, and you don't need to get bogged down in it. You can just say that they took a bus or boat or horse or whatever.

Balancing it in any given story is the writing equivalent of "this meeting could have been email". What do you actually have to get together in a conference room to discuss (show the readers in detail) versus what can be summarized in a few sentences in an email? What will make you bored out of your mind if you see too much of it, versus what will leave you lost and confused without it?

And of course just because something is telling or summarized doesn't mean that the way that you write isn't important! Your writing should still be engaging even when you're telling. Pay attention to the words you use, the rhythm of your sentences, the variety of sentence lengths, things like that. If something is pleasant to read it will keep the reader's attention on the page. If the sentence rhythms or lengths are too similar, it becomes "monotone" and causes people's attention to wander.

Something I pay special attention to is that - unless the narrator is subjective or unreliable - I don't tell something about characters in the narration which is shown to be false. Nothing gets me riled up like supposedly objective narration which tells me a character is like so and I should feel like this about them, but then their dialogue and actions reveal that to be patently false and I feel some other way. Of course that is something that relies on the narrator being objective and having access to more information than we do. If it's a POV character who might just be unobservant, overly arrogant, biased, or kinda stupid, that's fine

When it comes to showing versus telling in regards to the background/description...well. I struggle a lot with description because I have almost complete aphantasia and can't visualize things easily. So I cheat! Anything that I describe in detail is something that my POV character is actually paying attention to. The level of detail varies from book to book based on what kind of person has the POV and what sorts of things they notice. And again, that's relevant to the audience because it's information which is relevant to the character. This is also really great way to start building up to any kind of romantic interest, because people do tend to pay a lot more attention to people they're interested in!

I feel like this has gotten really long, so if there's anything that you would like me to elaborate on more or I wasn't clear about, feel free to send another ask! I won't say I'm objectively right (usually lol) but I'm always happy to talk shop.

Hopefully some of it can be helpful to you or at least give you some things to start thinking about. And of course, it's always a good way to start by studying books that you read and seeing what you like and what you don't like and how it's been handled in both.

#writeblr #writing #writing advice #thanks for the ask #I hope I could help :3

[elumish]

Because people seem to keep interpreting what I'm saying as trying to set rules for or censor authors, and I wanted to lay out my philosophy on ethical writing and media criticism in plain language. There are three broad pillars to how I approach it, which are below:

1) Authors are responsible for the content of their own work. There is a tendency to frame the adjudication of the ethics/morals/"goodness" of work as being essentially extrensic and reactionary--an author puts out a work and then people criticize it, and avoiding that criticism is the main reason why an author might try to avoid "bad things" in their stories. As a writer, I start from the other direction: I am always first and foremost responsible for what I write down in my story, and I have a responsibility to minimize the harm that work may do because I am a human being who lives in this world, not because someone might yell at me for it.

2) Any published work is open for critique. To me, there is a fundamental difference between writing something and publishing it, and once an author intentionally makes their work public, it can legitimately be criticized. This doesn't mean harassment, it doesn't mean flames, it doesn't mean being mean or petty or cruel. It doesn't even necessarily mean directing the critique at the author. But calling out racism or misogyny or ableism or simply critically discussing the content and message of a work is no less legitimate for a fanfiction than it is for an original published work, just as calling it out for a self-published work is no less legitimate than it is for one that went through a publisher. Things like readership/reach, cultural context, and other individuals involved can and should all be taken into account, but they don't make a work ineligible to be viewed critically.

3) Communities should have standards. I take the Nazi at the bar approach to community standards: when we welcome racists/misogynists/transphobes/etc. into our communities, then they become racist/misogynist/transphobic/etc. communities. And community standards are hard and nebulous and won't look the same thing everywhere, but there are ways that we can do them even on largely unmoderated places like AO3 and Tumblr. This is things like blocking people who express racist views, or not reccing misogynist stories, or standing up for Black fans or Fans of Color or disabled fans etc. Communities can say, we won't welcome Nazis in our communities. We won't welcome racists in our communities. We will ice them out, block them, not engage positively with their work.

Note that I didn't say start moderating AO3 or burning all the books that don't match our ethics. I'm talking about communities (fandoms, romance novel BookTok, whatever) taking responsibility for themselves and moving away from the idea that we can't have any say in who is in our community because it's the equivalent of censorship.

Every time people defend the presence racism in fandom, they make fandom less safe and welcoming to Fans of Color. Every time they defend antisemitism in the romance community, they make it less safe and welcoming to Jewish fans. That is what community standards are about.

#ethical writing #media criticism

[merakiui]

Been waiting to do thisss

⭐️ for tmdg!!! Plssss!!!!

Omg I've been wanting to ramble about tmdg!!! Thank you for asking!! <3 there are many details to discuss, but I listed a few below!

(ask game)

✧ many moray eel facts and behaviors are scattered throughout the story. Like the gaping mouths to signal a want to mate or their toxic blood or how most morays aren't monogamous or how they're a territorial species. Additionally, since Jade and Floyd are canonically bioluminescent, I thought it would be interesting if they were able to glow brightly when they're attracted to someone. >:D

✧ "body language" is mentioned often. this is an allusion to The Little Mermaid (specifically Ursula's line of "and don't underestimate the importance of body language!"), but also a nod to how moray eels interact in courtship. A lot of the gestures are based on body language, and I love the concept of the trio using body language as a means of flirting or conveying certain feelings without having to verbalize them.

✧ the scene in which reader becomes a grouper mer,,,, moray eels and groupers are actually hunting partners. they have a mutualistic bond in which they work together to hunt for meals. it's initiated by the grouper approaching the eel's living space and signaling to them through body language that they'd like to engage in a joint hunt. this is meant to mirror the mutualism Jade and reader have as well as show just how good of a match they are. Even as mers, they are perfect for each other. <3

✧ the title "The Most Dangerous Game" refers to the short story of the same name, in which a hunter is stranded on an island and meets a general who loves to hunt the most dangerous game of all (human beings). For you and Jade, the most dangerous game involves navigating your situationship while trying not to fall for him and his charms. There's a point in the story where you may be able to catch Reader's shifting feelings. >:)

✧ you can tell Jade really does love you when he gives you the entire tray of mushroom brownies. Jade is a foodie with a big appetite and he loves to eat, so for him to bake an entire tray of something and then not keep a single leftover for himself,,,, oh, he's so in love. orz he wants to provide for you, not just by cooking meals for you, but in many other ways as well, such as when he comforts you during the times in which you get upset and cry. :D I like to imagine one of the biggest love languages for merfolk is giving gifts (whether that's actual materialistic items or something intangible like quality time). it's a guarantee you'll be well-fed with Jade because he loves cooking for you!!!!

✧ heliotrope symbolism (eternal love).

✧ the moon and star comparisons. you liken Floyd to a star: something that shines brightly but can also be popular if not read as the astronomical definition. Jade likens you to the moon because, unlike the stars, there is only one moon (Earth's moon) and thus there is only one of you. but there's also something so romantic in Jade pining for the moon because the sky and sea are so separate from one another. truly a bittersweet reflection of Jade's feelings. they're as deep as the sea, but can't be encapsulated in the solar system because there is no room for him there (not when you're so in love with Floyd and have made him your entire world). orz

✧ the recurring mention of scent. I like the idea of merfolk being able to scent their partners so that it's easier to find them, but also so that they can make it known to others that that person is taken. >:) Jade claims he's been scenting you for fun, but the truth is that he fully intended to let everyone know that you are his. <3 Jade takes advantage of your limited knowledge on mer customs and culture hehe.

✧ all of the times in which Floyd (the real Floyd) is being sweet to you (buying you perfume or kissing you on the cheek)... those are just his ways of being much too friendly towards you. he never had any romantic attraction towards you to begin with, which is why it drove Jade so crazy because you were looking at and loving the wrong eel!!!! T_T

✧ the times in which phony Floyd is talking about Jade are actually Jade's true feelings and actions. he really did stay up late to learn new recipes for you. and he truly isn't very physical with others. jade just loves you too much and likes being near you, touching you, kissing you, etc. orz he had to say those things as floyd, otherwise he would have just said them outright and he's trying to have some tact. ;;;;

✧ the dinner date scene was Jade's attempt at having a genuine date with you, but because you're so Floyd-brained you mistook his gesture as being part of your arrangement. ^^;;;; in fact, most of the times in which Jade tries to be authentic, you either don't believe him or interrupt him to ramble about Floyd LOL. but the dinner date was the one time in which he was hoping to do something with you that wasn't part of your deal and instead just something between you and jade. >_< he's trying his best...

✧ the waltz you share with Jade is 100% courtship. reader refers to it as a "competition, not courtship," but she forgets Octavinelle is underwater and thus, as Jade noted, both of those things are indeed the same under the sea.

✧ when you ask Jade what the both of you will be after your tryst in the Coral Sea, he leaves the specifics up to you for your decision. he does this a lot in the fic (such as asking if you'd like the dinner date to qualify as such) because, though he appears mostly confident in his actions and words, he's too cowardly to clearly illustrate what the two of you are and doesn't want to do so when he knows you may not reciprocate. he also just wants to hear the words from your mouth because he hopes that, after all of these questions, you'll eventually say the thing he wants to be with you: lovers. :D

✧ alongside Jade and reader having a few similarities (one of which being the obsessive degrees they're willing to go to for their crush), there's significance in their feelings and how they handle them. reader's chasing someone who will never turn around to look at and love her. Jade's chasing someone who only looks at him when he's Floyd. though reader loves to extremes, she's scared of that love being reciprocated, which is partially why she doesn't let Jade say "I love you," whereas Jade just doesn't want to love in silence. they're both not the best at navigating love, and the ways they do it are,,,, questionable. orz but they both understand each other on that level because they're so obsessed. it's crazy to crazy communication. to quote Azul: "a match made in madness."

#twisted chit chat #sull1van #aaaaa there's so much to ramble about but i'll stop here before i write too much >_<

[darkbluekies]

A lot of jealousy filled yandere one shot please!!,,,been craving for some jealousy lately.

Jealousy makes people blind

Yandere!king OC x fem reader

Summary: you have to join in on the king's meeting, but the others gazes towards you makes the meeting end in blood.

Warnings: killing, beheading, blood, jealousy, obsessive behavior, yandere themes

Word count: 1.5k

A king who has everything and can get whatever he desires should be satisfied, shouldn’t he? Wrong. Edmund is greedy and violent and he’ll not stop fighting until he gets what he wants. Like how he got you. You can still see the horrific scene from when he forced you to marry him when you close your eyes, all the blood covering the floor, all the bodies. It hasn't disappeared yet. Uncleanable stains in the carpets and a metallic scent in the air is still prominent in the ballroom. You don't go there anymore. 

Edmund is currently rummaging through the chamber after his brooches. He would lose his own head if it weren't attached to his neck. Weirdly enough, he never seems to lose you or his wedding ring?

"Where the fuck are they?!" he shouts and rips the pillow that's right beside you off the bed. "I know I put them here somewhere!"

You should probably tell him that you put the brooches in your bedside table drawer. They were scattered across the floor yesterday and you knew that if they disappeared, he'd get one of his tantrums … so you put it in your drawer for safe keeping. He notices how you flinch when he rips the paraffin lamp down on the floor and quickly comes back to his senses. He crawls up on the bed and cups your cheeks.

"I'm sorry, love", he says softly. "I didn’t mean to scare you. Have you seen my brooches? I have to find them before the meeting."

Kings from other kingdoms are coming to the castle to discuss peace and alliance. And you have to join since you're now the queen.

"I put them away in my bedside table drawer …", you say shyly. 

"Why did you do that?"

"T-They were lying on the floor yesterday. I was scared they'd break or disappear."

All anger runs off his face and he gives you a relieved smile before kissing your lips.

"What would I do without you, hm?" he smiles and opens your drawer, finding the two jeweled brooches inside. "Thank you, my love."

You follow the small jewelry as he clips it onto his expensive clothing.

"You should make yourself ready too", Edmund says. "Although I'm not happy that you have to join my meeting because you have no reason to engage in politics … I'll accept it."

"Please don't do anything stupid."

"I won't do anything stupid. But if the other kings suggest something stupid, I will behead them and burn their castle to the ground!"

"That's not how you have a civilized discussion."

"I know. I don't care. If the court had not suggested that I invite them over to talk, they'd have stormed the castle!" He cups your cheeks. "I won't let anything happen to you." He lets go and starts walking back and forth again. "So now I have to argue with these pigs about my territory! For heaven's sake! It's my territory! They have no right to take it! And now we should compromise for whatever reasons I don't have the energy to care about!"

"Edmund. Calm down."

He sighs and nods.

"Fine", he agrees. "Okay, get ready now so we can get this over with. Afterwards, you and I are going to take a nap."

"I'd like to go to the library actually …", you say.

"No. We're going to nap."

You sigh and fight the urge to roll your eyes.

An hour later, you and Edmund walk through the castle hand in hand, escorted by royal guards. Edmund always holds you close whenever someone is around, whether it be a man or a woman. You are his and no one else can be trusted. Every woman in the kingdom dreams of being in your position and jealousy can make a person do horrible stuff.

They walk into the meeting room and see the other three kings sitting around the round table. They have scars over their faces and look more masculine than any man you’ve ever seen before. They remind you of vikings. Without noticing, you squeeze Edmund’s hand tighter. He smiles at you and kisses your temple. The other three kings stand up to shake your hand, but Edmund stops your hand before you can touch them. 

“Don’t touch my wife”, he says coldly. “Don’t even look at her. If she has to be here, then you’re not going to look at her.”

They laugh awkwardly and sit down again. You immediately feel out of place once they start discussing. Edmund’s hand is squeezing yours under the table, his grip growing tighter and tighter each minute. You give him a worried glance. 

“You’re hurting me”, you whisper. 

He sighs out and lightens his grip. He lifts up your intervened hands to his lips and kisses your fingers. You notice how the other kings gazes glance over to you and Edmund. Edmund notices. Before you have time to stop him, he shoots them dark eyes. 

“I told you not to look at her”, he says warningly. “Y/N, go outside.”

Your blood goes cold. You take a harder grip on Edmunds hand, a silent plea to make him realize what he’s going to do. 

“Go outside”, he tells you, giving you a small push towards the door. 

You understand that if you don’t listen to him, you’ll have to relive the day that has made you sleepless at night. Involuntarily, you stand up and make your way out the door. Edmund closes it behind you. You only have time to see his maniatic eyes before the door separates you. Edmund turns to the three kings and pulls out his sword from his belt. If there’s one thing Edmund can handle, it’s his sword.

“I told you not to look at her”, he says deeply and swings the sword around to give them a scare. “I told you not to look at my property. She’s mine. I’ve killed for her before and I will do it again.”

“Your majesty, we didn’t mean any disrespect to your beautiful wife”, one of the kings say slowly, holding his hands out in front of him. “Put down the weapon.”

“Beautiful, huh?” Edmund’s eyes are crazed and his heart is pounding too fast, too loud. He swings his sword. “Get down on your knees. Now.”

The other king gulps and slowly sinks down on the floor. Edmund puts the point of the sword to the man’s throat. 

“You’re right”, he says darkly. “My wife is beautiful. The most beautiful woman in this entire world. But you shouldn't look at her. You shouldn’t tell me that she’s beautiful. I can see that for myself. You probably have some real nasty thoughts about my wife, don’t you?” Edmund lets the glare move over to the other two men. “You do too. Why wouldn’t you? My wife is wonderful. But you’re not her husband. I am. She’s mine. Only mine.”

With that said, he swings the sword and the kneeling king’s head in front of him falls down to the wooden floor with a ‘thump’ while the body falls to the other side. Edmund stares down at the head, heavily breathing. He should feel bad, shouldn’t he? He thinks he should. But he doesn’t. 

“You two���, he says and points the bloody sword towards the remaining kings. “Anything you want to say about my wife, hm? Want to say how beautiful she is? How you wished she was yours? Continue wish upon a fucking star. She’s not going anywhere.”

He loses composition of himself and swings his sword left to right, slicing whatever piece of meat he can get a hold of. Once he notices that none of the men are standing anymore, he drops his sword and walks to the door. He finds you sitting outside, curled up in a ball with your back against the wall and hiding your face down in your knees. You look up once he comes out and his heart stops at the sight of your tears. He remembers how you were crying at the masquerade he held three months ago. You were so pretty then and he loved to see you so vulnerable. Whatever this is … he hates it. You have a look in your eyes that you didn’t have that night. Last time, your eyes softened once you saw the king … this time they go wide. You’re afraid of him. 

“Shh, shh”, he whispers and sinks down on his knees by your side. He cups your wet cheeks, stroking the skin with his thumbs. “Don’t cry, everything is okay now.”

“L-Let me go!” you sob while trying to push him away with your hands and turn your face away.

“It’s okay, my love.”

“I hate you!”

“I know my jealousy can be frightening, I know, okay?” He kisses your nose. “But it keeps you safe! It reassures our relationship! No one should break us apart!” He rests his forehead against yours. “Oh, I love you so much, my queen. I can’t live without you!”

You’re a sobbing mess in his hands. He tries holding you together, making sure that the pieces of you don’t fall apart. You’re squirming against him as if you were mad yourself.

“I’m protecting you”, Edmund says but you don’t know if it is to reassure you or reassure himself. 

You close your eyes and sob. Jealousy can make a person do horrible stuff.

#yandere #yandere talks #yandere drabbles #yandere imagines #yandere x you #yandere fics #yandere stories #yandere x reader #king yandere #yandere king

[utilitycaster]

In the end, it is misogyny but in the form of that Imogen (and most of the female cast, if we are being fair) gets reduced to just being a woman to the point that criticizing any real flaw, wrong doing, or "hey i personally maybe perhaps don't like that she did this" is turned into an attack on her because she is a woman, because after all, all women are perfect and so so dainty they must be protected (sarcasm)

Without mentioning the attacking real women in the name of the fictional one

It really is the "God forbid a woman do anything" but in it's worst form

Sorry for venting, been having thoughts about the fandom for the past 5 years

YUP. I do recommend Unlikeable Female Characters by Anna Bogutskaya which I devoured in like, one sitting over my winter break and posted a bunch of excerpts from but this discourse is extremely not limited to the CR fandom. I mean, think about all of the endlessly churning nonsense about the women of Gone Girl and Midsommar. I am going to see Love Lies Bleeding tomorrow and have steered well clear of really any discussion because I simply would like to see buff lesbians in a crime drama but apparently the discourse is rancid.

Of course there are people who assume ill of female characters while excusing men. That is absolutely a big problem. But again, we can barely talk about that. I recently made a post about how Laura is not a particularly chaotic player, and indeed is one of the most cautious players in actual play, and again I think there is a serious and important conversation to be had about how there's probably a reason why, say, Travis and Taliesin are more likely to make extremely bold moves, because they didn't get raked over the coals during C1 for stealing a cool broom from a guest character! I actually think Marisha has managed to hang on to some of her boldness and it makes her a stronger player but I would not have been surprised if she retreated after the hate she got from Keyleth. But yeah, in actual play, bold moves are pretty important. We can't even talk about how real-world misogyny holds back the actual actors without some moronic wretch being like "FIGURES THAT A MISOGYNIST CUNT LIKE YOU LIKES A MALE ACTOR."

When a character who is a man - or in some cases, characters who are not men but are played by men - does something people don't like we can say "wow, I didn't like this, but it was an interesting choice by the actor!" but we aren't allowed to either talk about the reasons why a real world woman might hesitate to play a character who does ugly things - because of the misogynistic backlash that will land specifically on her as a real person - nor can we compliment her for going for it and playing a complex flawed character, because how DARE you say a woman is anything less than some kind of Divine Feminine ideal. At best you're allowed a two-dimensional caricature of She's So Sweet And Good But Sometimes Gets Angry (this also happened to my friend Keyleth).

And this might reveal my own biases but like. I as a woman don't love being called self-centered, but that, personally, would probably lead me to some reflection. If you call me a girlfailure, even jokingly, I am going to break your nose. It's really telling that like...one of the absolute no-brainer "hey stop calling grown women girls" feminist tenets has gone by the wayside particularly with the set of people who think that meta that fails to put women on so high a pedestal they are untouchable is misogynist. They are awful towards women, fictional and real.

A line that always stuck with me from, bizarrely, a book about wordplay, was that Victorian men would treat women of their same classes as their superiors, but never their equals - they would coddle them and protect them but they wouldn't actually engage with their thoughts and foibles. (This happened to my friend Jester).

Anyway my personal solution is to keep going. On some level, as my previous post indicates, while I don't want the harassment it also only underscores my point, that a lot of these people are way more invested in being a dick to women on the internet than writing meta about the pretend women they think they like. I have to imagine they're doing this because either think they're entitled to meta they like from people who can actually fucking write it because god knows most of the people making this complaint have the most "if you can't dazzle them with brillance, blind them with the most purple-prose bullshit you can muster" attitude; or because they literally are just champing at the bit to attack women online with the ostensible veneer of "but it's FEMINIST to call THESE women cunts because they said my blorbo wasn't saintly and flawless." However, again, I know that I'm pretty bullheaded and forcibly unlearned the uh, patriarchal idea that women should not be confrontational. I do not blame people who look at this whole situation and say "I'm going to keep my thoughts to myself because this is so unpleasant."

#answered #Anonymous #i got a ghost message too that i only assume is for the same reason as my previous anon #and like. ngl. i'm THIS close to naming suspected names. like i have tried to keep quiet but *rashinna voice* can we take out the trash #i'd love to see more meta about imogen but again i don't blame the people who are like nope not worth it. #cr tag

[seriousbrat]

This is so insidious. "Be aware of your language because you might unknowingly be spreading Evil ideology!!" basically just means "don't talk about this at all because it bothers me". It's so so transparent. If I'm constantly having to be careful about what I say about female characters (regardless of my actual intended meaning) because this Supreme Arbiter of Truth might randomly decide it's Terf Rhetoric Actually how can I ever have any sort of meaningful discussion at all? Notice how it's framed as "unknowingly"– if I have no possible way of knowing HOW I'm using Evil Language, how can I possibly avoid it? By shutting up is the answer.

It's based on NOTHING. It's a strawman. There is not a single Lily fan that thinks that Lily is just a mother and nothing else. Seeing Lily as more than a mother and recognising motherhood is important to her story are not mutually exclusive. Furthermore, in what world is pointing out that women are sidelined in fandom terf rhetoric? This person is just deliberately conflating discussions about misogyny in fandom with hate groups because they know that's an easy way to get people riled. They're pretending the main argument against Lily's exclusion in fandom is about motherhood (it's not) and then doing a further mental backflip to stir up moral outrage about people defending female characters.

Be absolutely clear about this- this person KNOWS, deep down, that there is a reason why they only engage with male characters, and this bothers them. Instead of being honest with themselves about it they are inventing a bullshit faux progressive reason to silence any and all criticism and convince their own conscience that they're in the right.

There are no laws, obviously, saying you can't change lily's story or make her a side character if you want. I myself once made her a side character in a prongsfoot fic. The problem is when this is an overwhelming tendency in fandom, which IS significant and IS, in my opinion at least, worth pointing out. When arguably the most important character in the Marauders Era is routinely sidelined in favour of male characters who are literally irrelevant, that does actually say something about what sorts of characters fandom likes to engage with and why. When she's routinely bashed and hated for not really doing anything wrong while male characters who range from bullies to murderers are excused and idealised, that does say something.

It's never pleasant to have to critically examine your own interactions with fiction and accept that your preferences might be rooted in deeper-held beliefs about the world. But it is important, and one way to do this is to facilitate open conversations between different points of view. One way to NOT do this is claiming that everyone else but you is "accidentally" "unknowingly" using evil language so they might as well shut up about their opinions and about women in general.

#im sorry but this actually annoyed me. #its sooo condescending too. i know what the fuck im saying. #the reason i don't agree w lily being sidelined isn't because she's a mother it's because shes A WOMAN #and also what does ANY of this have to do with trans people?? 😭 #whats also insidious is using real issues of transphobia to silence people saying that women are sidelined #that literally... includes trans women because they are also sidelined along with ... the rest of women #god #everyone was a girl in that prongsfoot fic dont accuse me of centring men #(that's a joke. i actually think i have more m/m fics on my ao3 than anything else) #(by ONE. but still)