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#bc technically they didn't give up on happy life
nightmanatee · 1 year
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sometimes i just think about quotes like this. and then i think of rose, who was forced by the doctor to stay in the alternate reality. i think donna who forgot about all of her adventures bc she became doctordonna. i think about rory who almost got away. i think about amy who had to give up this life bc she loves rory more. i think about clara who died but also can't ever meet the doctor again. i think about river who died saving the doctor and never got a chance to properly HAVE this life. i think about bill who died and never got to know that her twelve lived. i think about yaz who was again forced by the doctor to leave.
yeah anyways fuck moffat for this quote/j
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keyotosprompts · 2 months
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we were somewhere else *ੈ𑁍༘⋆
established relationship dialogue prompts
⇴ "were you thinking about eating that?" "yes... why? wait. you were planning on eating it, weren't you." (and they still end up giving their partner a share of their food)
⇴ "really? we've been together for [x] years and you're still worried about that?"
⇴ "wait–why didn't we hear anything about this?" "you and person b were in your own little happy, coupley, rainbow-sunshine world!"
⇴ "okay, let's put the laptop away. we're going to bed."
⇴ "i feel awful. like literal death." "that's why i told you to always wear a jacket. now you've caught a cold. now let me take care of you, babe."
⇴ "no, i'm not doing that," and they do it anyway.
⇴ "your feet are freezing!" and they jolt when their partner's feet touches them.
⇴ "sometimes i don't know what i would've done if i haven't met you. it's like i need you, because if you're not here, it's like i can't even breathe."
⇴ "honestly, i think if you fell over right now, i'd laugh." "would you help me up?" "i suppose so."
⇴ "you've had me since day one. i know i like to say that you're entranced by me, but i've always been marveled by you."
⇴ "i miss you, will you come back to bed?"
⇴ "why are you trailing your fingers across my face?" "just wanted to admire you. you're really cute, did you know that?"
⇴ "out of everyone in my life, you're my person–the most important one. nothing tops you."
⇴ "did you use the last bit of my shampoo?" "technically, we both used it all–y'know, when we showered together–" (a pillow is thrown)
⇴ "this combined playlist is really mid, and i think i know who ruined it..." "do not slander chopin right now." "it's piano music mixed with rap!"
⇴ "i haven't told you this, but did you know that you inspire me?" "me? are you serious? what have i done to inspire you?" "everything you do for me. all the work you put into your work and your relationships. all those little things: every day, i want to be just like you."
⇴ "you remembered!!" "babe, that's the bare minimum."
⇴ "those could be our kids one day." "what...?" (person b malfunctions bc they've been thinking about kids w/ a for a while)
⇴ "i want a house by the beach. with big windows." "and a good kitchen." "oh of course. way better than ours."
⇴ "so it's going to be like this forever? you and me?" "who else?"
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f1rodrigo · 2 months
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the mclaren boy mystery | part two
l. norris / o. piastri
summary: in which your boyfriend is a formula one driver for team mclaren and when you finally decide it's time to start hinting to the world, the internet is confused on exactly which driver is your boyfriend. pairing: social media au || lando norris / oscar piastri x reader fc: jazmyn makenna a/n: sorry this took a little longer than i expected! it was so fun to make though. i didn't want to say who she's actually with because i feel like it's fun for the readers to have to figure that out too! so please share any guesses you have lol i'm interested to see what people think the outcome will be. hope you enjoy and thank you sm for reading<3
part one | sweet relief series | valentine's day drabble
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liked by yourbrother, maxverstappen1, and 101,225 others
yourusername happy birthday to my favorite brother, i love you and am so grateful to know i have someone in my life who looks after me like you do<3 here's my fav pics of us of course they're all racing related lol, our first love
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yourbrother "my favorite brother"... As far as I know I am your only brother 😐
⤷ yourusername 🥱🥱🥱🥱 technicalities
yourbrother Thank you least favorite sister, miss those days. Have to get back out on the karting track, been too long since I've beaten you
⤷ yourusername been too long since you've been beaten, you mean?
⤷ yourbrother Yeah, yeah we'll let the track times speak for themselves
⤷ user1 ok but we have to admit the brother sister banter is kind of adorable
⤷ user2 no bc she seems so sweet 😭
user3 nah because what is max verstappen doing in this girls likes now????
⤷ user4 and the plot thickens 😯
user5 she saw everyone calling her a fake f1 fan and said take a look at this
user6 yn hater club how you guys feeling right about now
⤷ user7 🤡🤡🤡🤡
user8 honestly kind of hope she's dating one of them
⤷ user9 yall switch up so fast please 😭😭
user10 seriously..... you HAD to only post f1 related photos lmfao so totally pandering to the landoscar fans
user11 f1 school of wags next graduate
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liked by mclaren, yourusername, and 1,891,218 others
landonorris DOUBLE PODIUM!!!!!!!! couldn't have asked for a better race, congrats @/oscarpiastri and a huge thanks as always to @/mclaren 🧡
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user1 I SAY THATS MY BABY AND IM SO PROUD 😭
user2 mclaren double podium... oh i used to pray for times like these
user3 oscar piastri you are insane omfg
user4 MY POOKIES LOOK AT THEM !!!!!!!!! 🫂
user5 save me landoscar SAVE ME
yourusername jumping up and down screaming and crying losing my mind
⤷ landonorris you should probably get that checked out....
⤷ user6 THATS IT, ITS YN AND LANDO IM CALLING IT
⤷ user7 nah nah nah this is so giving gf of the bestie banter
⤷ user8 agreed hopping on the oscaryn train 💪🏻
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yourusername added to their story
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oscarpiastri added to their story
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liked by kellypiquet, oscarpiastri, and 789,012 others
yourusername qatar gp smiles <3 practice timeeee
📸 @/kellypiquet
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kellypiquet so beautiful
⤷ yourusername all you
landonorris eye spy a mclaren car down there?
⤷ yourusername ? i just see a tractor
⤷ landonorris not funny. 😐
⤷ yourusername i certainly laughed
⤷ oscarpiastri same actually
⤷ user1 i dont know how much longer i can take this
⤷ user2 GUYSSSS i am telling you its so oscaryn
⤷ user3 WHAT literally look at the Proof its so landoyn 🥱
⤷ user4 i am giggling we're literally in a shipwar
user5 she's so pretty i'm sorry guys i love her 😵‍💫
⤷ user6 well yes!
user7 patiently waiting for one of the mcl boys to main feed post her then we know for sure ‼️
⤷ user8 at this rate it still won't clear anything up
lilymhe miss u beautiful
⤷ yourusername omg i miss u more ms lily
⤷ user9 she has The wag stamp of approval WE MOVE!
user10 theres four e's at the end of 'time'....... landos number is 4 i've got it guys 😃😃
⤷ user11 seek medical attention STAT
⤷ user12 bro thinks this is a taylor swift album release
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liked by mclaren, landonorris, and 789,012 others
yourusername oscar piastri sprint race winner AND mclaren double podium, better start calling me the good luck charm
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user1 nah bc you're onto something.....
user2 she can't be serious 😐
⤷ user3 well no shit it's just an instagram caption
user4 i cannot be the only one who finds the caption extremely weird
⤷ user5 nah i'm with you i've never liked her 🙄
⤷ user6 its just so odd like forcing yourself into the mclaren narrative completely taking away from the boys achievements writing it off as your own doing...
⤷ user7 omfg yall are so dramatic just say you're jealous they're not dating you lmfao
⤷ user8 no fr because it is not that serious it's clearly a joke like she loves them cmon now
mclaren BRB getting your paddock passes for the duration of the season
⤷ yourusername i'm giggling, i love you guys 😙
⤷ user9 see mclaren is fine with it so yall should be too
⤷ user10 now i'm going to need all the haters to sit DOWN and shut the fuck UP
oscarpiastri wait can you send me that picture
⤷ yourusername i literally did already but okay
⤷ oscarpiastri ok could do with less attitude
⤷ yourusername you have not seen real attitude piastri
⤷ oscarpiastri 😧
⤷ user11 i think this just converted me to team oscar
⤷ user12 nah this is literally landoyn confirmation
landonorris 🍀
⤷ user13 i am picking up what he's putting down
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part one | sweet relief series | valentine's day drabble
taglist:
@landoscar-f1 , @urfavnoirette , @imsiriuslyreal
806 notes · View notes
sanguineterrain · 10 months
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redamancy | steve harrington
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Summary: redamancy (n.) - the act of loving someone who loves you back; a love returned in full // or, four times you kissed Steve Harrington, and one time he finally kissed you back.
Pairing: Steve Harrington x fem!reader
Word count: 5.2k
Warnings/tags: friends to lovers, 5+1 fic format, no use of y/n, FLUFF, PINING PINING, injured s4 steve, hospital setting, general vecna angst (eddie's alive bc i will never kill eddie in my fics), bed sharing, happy ending, and kissing. if that wasn't clear. :)
A/N: fun fact: this is the first time i've written a 5+1 fic! technically it's 4+1 but whatevs. if you enjoy this fic, please give it a reblog and support your local steve harrington tumblrina.
divider by firefly-graphics
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i. the promise 
"Would you ever get married?" 
You open your eyes. The setting sun nearly blinds you through the windshield. Immediately, you stick out a hand to block it. 
You're still reclined all the way back in the passenger seat, because Steve's fancy schmancy BMW can do that. He frequently lectures you about doing it while he's driving. Have I taught you nothing? Road safety! 
"I mean, I guess so," you say. "If someone ever wants to put a ring on me."
You sit up and pull down the sun visor. Steve turns. His hair lightens in the summer, shades of reddish blond peeking through. He insists his hair has never been anything but brown, fiercely pledging his allegiance to brunettes. You coo at his highlights all the same. 
"I want to," he says after a minute. "I wanna get married." 
You're parked down the block from your house. You should've gotten out ten minutes ago, but there's never any rush when you're with Steve.
"The line to wed you will be out the door, champ," you say around a grin. 
"Hm. I dunno." He stretches in his seat. "Maybe if I was the same guy I was a few years ago." 
You wrinkle your nose. "I doubt that."
"But what can I really offer?" he continues. "I'm just some guy who can't get into college."
"That doesn't mean no one will marry you. Some people who go to college are dumber than dirt. They get married. College has nothing to do with it. You can go, if you really want to. One rejection doesn't say anything about you, Steve." 
"I guess."
You pull the lever on the side. The seat shoots up with a brrrap! It clicks as you straighten. 
"Where did all this come from, anyway?" you ask. 
Steve shrugs. "Just thinking."
"Dangerous."
He smiles. "I like to live on the edge."
"Contemplating marriage like the world's biggest sap. Definitely edgy."
Steve hums. His hands are in his lap. He picks at a cuticle, a habit he’s recently developed. You wonder why he’s so anxious. 
"Two people from our graduating class got married last week."
Your eyes widen. "You're kidding."
"Nope. Lisa Schell and Gary Brewer." 
"Wait, didn't she cheat on him?"
"Yeah, but he slept with her sister, so I guess they called it even."
You shake your head. "That's insane. They're literally babies, Steve. That's like Dustin getting married."
Steve scowls. "He's not allowed to get married before me." 
"Not even to his possibly fictional Suzie?" 
"Not even to her."
You stare at the freckles on Steve's face and how his frizz kind of looks like a halo in the light. You imagine the feel of his hair in your hands, the warmth of his scalp.
"I'd marry you," you say. 
Steve's eyebrows shoot up. 
"What?"
"Like, if you were in a pinch."
He looks at you sideways. You flatten, then scrunch your hands over your knees. Your tongue feels too big for your mouth. 
"I'm talking about spending the rest of my life with someone, you know. Not borrowing fifty bucks."
"Fifty bucks is a lot of money for some of us, Harrington."
"That’s probably how much Lisa's wedding dress cost."
"I hope she kept the receipt."
Silence descends. A soft breeze blows through your cracked window. You want to search Steve's glove box for gum, but you've just told him you'd marry him, so you can't do anything except think about the fact that those words came out of your mouth. 
"Are you…" Steve begins, then pauses. "Why did you say that?"
"Because you're worried, for some incomprehensible reason, that no one will marry you."
"I scoop ice cream for a living."
You level him with a look. 
"Steve. We're kids. Cut yourself some slack."
His eyes turn hollow. They've been doing that lately. You wish you knew why. 
"I don't really feel like a kid these days," he says. 
Something about the way Steve sounds makes you want to climb over the console and curl into him, cradle his head to your neck. Which is crazy. You guys don't do that. Steve isn't yours to do that with. 
"Let's make a pact," you say softly. 
He meets your eye. "A pact?"
"Mmhm. Let's say if both of us aren't married by… thirty, then we'll get married."
"Well, I don't want a pity marriage." 
You roll your eyes. "It's not a pity marriage, Steve."
"Thirty is so late! You really think I won't be married by then?" he asks. 
"No, I don't think that. I already said folks will be lined up to marry you," you say. 
"I can't wait till I'm thirty." 
"Or you'll turn into an old maid?" 
"Meh meh meh," he mocks without any heat. 
You purse your lips so you don't smile. "Fine. We'll split the difference. Twenty-four?"
Steve considers that. Really considers it. It suddenly occurs to you what you're promising and who you're promising it to. You wonder if you'll both forget about it. Or brush it off. Oh, what did we know? We were kids!
Except Steve doesn't feel like a kid. And maybe you don't either, as much as you wish you do. 
"Do you mean it?" he asks. 
"Of course I do."
"No, seriously." He's serious. "I mean it, so if you don't…"
"Steve, I said I mean it. I do."
"You'll marry me?"
"I will."
"Swear on it."
You hold out your right pinkie out, waiting. Steve hooks his finger over yours. Impulsively, you kiss your linked pinkies. To show that you really, truly mean it.
You try to picture it. What walking down the aisle to meet Steve at the altar would feel like. You wonder if he'd keep his hair long, like it is now. You like it long. Would he keep it long for you?
"Will you buy me a ring?" you ask. "If we get married, I mean."
"Of course I'd buy you a ring," Steve says. "I'd get you anything you wanted."
"Okay." Your heart hammers in your chest. "I'm gonna go home."
"Alright. Want me to pull up to the door?"
"No, it's fine. Walking is good for digestion. Those milkshakes were no joke."
Steve smiles. He has such a lovely smile. His Cupid's bow is shaped exactly like a heart. 
"Same time tomorrow? It's movie night." 
Right. Your movie night. A semi-regular occasion that includes you, Steve, Robin, and the kids, sometimes. You've watched at least a dozen movies this summer together. Only this time, you're watching a movie after promising to marry Steve. 
"Sounds good," you say. "Will you pick me up?"
"Always."
Another promise. You hadn't realized how many Steve makes to you. 
"'Kay. See you."
You get out. Steve waves as he pulls away from the curb. 
Your ring finger feels bare. You rub it, hoping the feeling will go away. 
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ii. the wound 
The plastic chair has turned your legs numb. Your butt is about to follow. 
Can butts go numb? You're not sure. You'll find out soon, though. 
You rub your eyes. God, you need sleep. 
Across the room, you catch Joyce Byers' gaze. She smiles at you, though it's brittle. You try to smile back, feeling distinctly like you might break if you stretch your mouth too far. 
She looks away, and your not-smile falls. 
"They'll let us in soon," she says, like she knows. She does know. Better than you, certainly. 
The hospital smells cold. It smells like a place people go to die. 
Your heartbeat ratchets. You shouldn't think like that. 
"You don't understand," comes Dustin's voice. He's at the receptionist's desk, flanked by Mike and Lucas. Dustin's face is red and blotchy, near tears. 
"I need to see him. You won't let me see Eddie, so—" 
The receptionist rears back, like she can't believe three children are daring to speak to her. 
"Neither patient is cleared for visitors," she says icily. "Now, for the last time: have a seat."
Out of the corner of your eye, you see Joyce begin to stand, ready to herd the kids away. You beat her to it. Out of everyone in this room, you're probably the only person who has the strength to stand. 
"Guys, c'mon. It won't be long." 
They don't look at you. You don't take it personally. An hour earlier, you'd cornered Dustin and forced him to tell you what happened. What's been happening. 
So he did. And now you're here. 
You don't blame them for glaring at the prickly receptionist. But you know that won't do anything. It won't heal Steve quicker. And it won't make anybody feel better. 
"Hey, Dustin." You lay a hand on his shoulder. He looks at you like you're not Steve. You wish it was you in surgery instead. 
"Come sit," you say. 
"I need to see him," he tells you. 
"I know." Your throat tightens, threatening to trap your words altogether. You rush to get the rest out. "I do too. But this isn't going to make that happen faster. Come sit with me. Okay?"
"He'll be fine," Mike says quietly. "They don't wanna get sued by his asshole dad."
You nod, because yeah, good point. Quite possibly the first time Richard Harrington has brought anybody comfort. He's in Cancun, last you'd heard. You hope he chokes on a margarita. 
Dustin follows you. Mike and Lucas sit next to Joyce. The five of you wait. 
At some point, you fall asleep. When you wake up, it's to the contentious receptionist peering over you all. 
"Mr. Harrington is awake," she says primly. "You may see him now, young man."
Dustin flies out of the chair, Lucas and Mike at his heels. 
A part of you wants to go home, and you feel terrible for it. You feel terrible that Steve almost died, but you're the frightened one. You don't know if you can bear to see him tied to tubes and a heart monitor.
"Go on."
Joyce tracks you sleepily. Her hair is more knotted than before you fell asleep. She nods to the hallway. 
"Go see him."
You can’t voice every thought, every fear. I don’t know if I can see him like this.
“It’s good he won’t wake up alone,” she says.
“He’s got a family.” You wave your hand weakly. 
Joyce watches you for a moment. Then she gets up.
"Yes, he does." 
She holds out her hand. 
You don’t know Joyce Byers very well. This is probably the longest conversation you’ve had with her. You realize, then, that you're wrong—you’re not the one who’s strong enough to stand.
“Let’s go see him,” she says. "All of his loved ones should be there." 
God, are you really that obvious? 
You take her hand, and the two of you go down the hall.
Steve is nearly unrecognizable in the hospital bed. The kids are speaking to him, unusually quiet. They look up when you enter. 
Steve’s eyes lock with yours. 
“Hey,” is all you say.
“Hi,” he says, voice rough with disuse and getting choked by what Dustin had described as demon bats. 
“Boys, come on,” Joyce calls. “Let’s make a cafeteria stop.”
You see Dustin about to protest, but Lucas tugs his arm like he knows, and goddamn, you really are that obvious, aren’t you? 
You wait for the door to close behind you. Then you walk to Steve’s side. 
The gnarled ring of flesh around his neck makes you queasy. The rest of him isn’t much better, red and purple smeared across any skin that’s not covered by the chalky hospital gown.
You sit in the chair. It’s the same plastic kind as the ones in the waiting room, but this one doesn’t feel so hard.
“Robin called me,” you say.
Steve closes his eyes. “I’m sorry.”
“Yeah, you’d better be.” Your voice cracks. “Can’t believe you went dimension-surfing without me.”
“You’re mad at me.”
Your breath is punched out of you. 
“No,” you say softly. “My God, Steve. I’m not mad at you.”
His hand creeps to the edge of the bed. His fingers are scraped.
You take his hand and lace your fingers together. He slow-blinks. He’ll probably fall asleep in the next half hour. 
“It’s okay if you are,” he whispers. “Mad, I mean. I’d be mad too.”
You know he wouldn’t be, though. You know Steve would forgive you in a heartbeat.
“I’m not mad,” you say, equally as quiet. “I just… I was scared." 
He nods. "I'm sorry for scaring you." 
You bow your head and close your eyes. When Robin had called, you'd run to the bathroom and coughed up stomach acid.
They say he’ll make it, she'd told you, and you'd realized with violent clarity that you love him. 
But Steve doesn't need that right now. So you bury it.
You lean in and bring Steve's knuckles to your lips, taking care not to jostle him.
His eyes widen. Part of you hopes he won’t remember this conversation.
"Don't do that again," you say. “Not without me.”
"Okay,” he whispers. “I won't." 
You wait until he falls asleep, hand in his. 
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iii. the brand
“There’s no way I’m getting in your death van, Munson!” Robin whines.
“Death van is an exaggeration, Buckley. If anything, it’s a life van. I’m still here, aren’t I?” Eddie asks.
“Definitely not because of that heap of metal,” Steve murmurs to you. You snicker.
It’s nearly dark, but a summer dark, where it doesn’t actually turn to night until well after nine PM. The top two buttons of Steve’s dress shirt are undone, and you can’t stop staring. It’s embarrassing, really. You’d nearly missed Eddie’s walk across the stage because of that damned triangle of tanned skin and dark chest hair.
“Why can’t we take the station wagon?” Robin asks. 
“I think Nancy already left,” you say. “Sorry, Rob.” 
“And I’ve put my car jacking days behind me,” Eddie announces, flinging his arms out. “So my van it shall be!”
Robin whips her head around to glare at Steve. 
“This is your fault,” she accuses scathingly.
“Me?!”
“You just had to go and get a flat tire yesterday.”
“Yeah, Steve,” you add cheekily. “Why couldn’t you have foreseen the dreaded timeline where Eddie drives?”
“Et tu?” Eddie asks. “I’m hurt. I’m a great driver, y’know. Better than Steve, some have told me.”
“Dustin only told you that ‘cause you were high on morphine and about to burst into tears,” Robin says.
As they bicker, Steve draws closer, so your arms brush. You close the distance, crowding him.
“Y’okay?” he asks quietly.
“Yes,” you say, startled. “Why wouldn’t I be?”
“Just checking.”
“Are you okay?”
He turns to you. He looks like he’s searching for something. You don’t know what.
“Yeah,” Steve says after a minute. “I am. Better than, actually.”
“‘Cause I’m here, right?” you ask with a gooey grin.
“Yeah. ‘Cause you’re here.”
He sounds honest, so you turn away, because you can’t handle that and his chest hair. 
"I should get to choose where we go," Robin says as you arrive at Eddie's van. "Since it may be our last trip and all."
"Funny you were in Band and not president of the drama club, Buckley," Eddie says dryly. 
"Pot, kettle."
"How 'bout Rita's?" you suggest. "Unlimited refills and no one will hassle Eddie."
"Aw, you care about little ol' me?" Eddie asks. 
"If you get us there in one piece, yes."
Eddie huffs. "No wonder you and the Hair are like this." He crosses his fingers. 
"Damn right," Steve says. "We even finish each other's—"
"Terribly cliche sayings!" you say. 
Robin looks at you for a moment, unusually smirky. Then she looks at Steve. 
"You match. Blue dress, blue tie."
"That's so if she gets lost, they know who to return her to," Steve says. 
You scoff. "More like the other way around." 
He pouts. "Hey."
"Hay is for horses," you sing, skipping ahead to Eddie's van. 
"I'm sorry, are you excited to ride in the Hell Van?" Robin asks. 
You shrug. "We could use some excitement around here, couldn't we?"
"No!" all three say.
"I've had enough excitement for ten lifetimes," Robin mutters. 
Eddie pulls the door open. Your smile quickly drops. 
"Uh, Eddie? Where the fuck are the seats?"
"Right, so, usually I only have Gareth and Jeff ride with me. Gareth always calls shotgun—"
"Shotgun!" Robin hollers, and races to the front seat. 
You stare at the single backseat chair. There's no way it's big enough for you and Steve. 
"Holy shit," Steve says, taking stock of the "backseat."
Eddie rubs the back of his neck. "Yeah… listen, if I'd known we'd be taking her, I would've put the other seat in, swear! Usually we take it out for the equipment." 
"Well, what are we supposed to do? Lay down and pray? This is how people get head injuries, Eddie," you say, arms folded. 
"Maybe we can call a cab," Steve suggests. 
"At this hour?" You shake your head. "No way. This isn't Indianapolis."
"Oh my God." Robin groans. "The solution is so obvious. Sit on Steve's lap. Boom. Now come on, I'm starving."
You tense. Steve is tactile, sure, and you've become acclimated to that over the years. 
But this? This is way, way beyond that. 
"Uh…" Steve glances at you. "Do you… I mean, if you don't mind?"
You glance at Eddie, who's got the tiniest smirk. You glower and he clears his throat, hiding his mouth behind a lock of hair. 
"I don't mind," you say, more confident than you feel. "It's a short drive."
Eddie nods. "Definitely. I'll step on it."
"Please don't step on it," Robin calls. "We're already chancing fate by letting you drive in the first place."
Eddie huffs, walking to the driver's side. "Y'know, Buckley, you are just…"
You look at Steve. He smiles at you, sweet as always. 
"This isn't gonna aggravate any injuries, right?" you ask. "Me… sitting on you?"
You wince at the wording. 
"No, should be fine. My PT gave me the all clear a month ago."
You nod tightly. "Right. Okay. You go first."
Steve climbs in, planting his feet on the floor. You go next, stooping in front of him. You catch each other's gaze for a moment. Then you laugh, suddenly trying to look anywhere but at Steve. 
"Right, so I'll just…"
You slide onto Steve's lap, trying to hold some of your weight so you won't crush him. He splays an easy hand over your belly and leans over to pull the van door shut. Your heart thunders in your chest. 
"You can sit back, y'know," he says, breath tickling your ear. "’M not made of glass."
"Didn't want your legs to go numb," you joke weakly. 
Steve makes an unhappy noise and tugs you back so you're fully seated on him. You angle yourself so you can look at him. Steve looks up at you, lightly tracing a pattern on your hip. Like you do this all the time. 
"Hi," you say, too jittery to crack another joke. 
Steve smiles gently. "Hey."
His tone is fond. You feel sick. 
"Everybody good?" Eddie asks. 
He adjusts the rear view mirror and you watch his eyebrows shoot up in the reflection. 
"You two look cozy."
"Shut the fuck up, Munson," you mumble. "Just drive, already." 
Eddie giggles like a gremlin in reply and turns the ignition.
It’s not bad, at first. Eddie takes it easy driving through Hawkins. Part of it is because he doesn’t want to attract attention. The other part is that Hopper promised Eddie a night in jail if he caught him running the stop signs again. 
You personally think it’s a bluff. Robin does not; she’s enthusiastically annoying about road safety, and points out every single sign and red light. This causes Eddie to start slamming the breaks in retaliation. 
“Holy fuck!” you yelp when Eddie hits the breaks particularly hard. “Eddie!”
Steve is quick to tug you backwards, considering you’re not belted. You scramble to grab his shoulders and twist to look at him.
“Thanks,” you say breathlessly.
He smiles, then leans away, glaring at the front.
“Really, Munson?”
“She started it!” Eddie insists. “Blame your BFF!”
“Can you drive like someone who doesn’t have a death wish?” Robin shoots back.
Steve’s hands are now on the small of your back and on your hip, respectively. Your legs hang over the side of the carseat, butt nestled quite firmly on his thighs. 
God, you’re never living this down. 
“Y’okay?” 
Steve’s breath in your ear makes you squirm. You turn to look at him.
“Fine,” you murmur. “I’m not crushing you, am I?”
“No,” he says. “Don’t worry.”
Eddie breaks again, harder than before. You slip. 
Steve reacts instantly, his hand grabbing the meat of your thigh. Your dress rides up, so it’s skin on skin. 
The momentum is worse, however, because you jerk back. Right into Steve’s face.
Your nose mashes into his, which isn’t great. But then, your lips smush against his cheek. When you pull back, there’s a smeared lipstick print.
Maybe you’re the one with a death wish.
Robin is screeching incoherently but you can't focus on anything but the smudge of pink on Steve's cheek. Your chest feels tight. 
He looks like he's yours.
"Yeah, we're fine, " Steve says, voice close enough to startle you back into the conversation. 
He looks up at you. Your hand lands on the lipstick, like if you cover it, it'll go away. Steve tilts his head, mouth open in a question. 
"Sorry," you rush out before he can speak. "I got some of my, uh, lipstick on you." 
He relaxes. 
"Oh. Thought I was bleeding or something," he says with a slight laugh. "'S okay, I can wipe it off when we get there."
"Uh-huh." 
You drop your hand. You can't stop staring. Stop staring.
The print isn't exactly in the shape of your lips, but it's close. You can see the divots and where your lips parted. If someone were to see you two, they'd assume a lot of things you're not. 
Steve's collar is wrinkled from the van ride from Hell. His neck is flushed. You wonder how your lipstick would look there. 
Eddie presses the brake, softer this time. Steve's fingers dig into the meat of your thigh anyway. More marks. 
"Alright, relax, gang," Eddie says. "We're almost there."
You touch Steve's cheek again and hope he'll forget to wash you off of his face. 
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iv. the secret
It's raining. You're in Steve's bed. 
Thunder shakes the sky. You curl further into your—Steve’s—pillow. It smells like his soap and detergent. 
You used to like the rain. Not so much these days. Rain makes you think of blood on asphalt and being alone at twenty-four. Rain silences you. 
"Do you think he'll come back?" 
You've never dared to ask anyone. Not even Joyce. She'd know. She wouldn't tell you the truth, though. 
Nancy Wheeler probably could. She'd face you with that steel brow of hers and give it to you straight. 
Yes. The monster's back. You're not getting married. 
You slip your hand into Steve’s. He squeezes your fingers. Outside, the rain roars. 
"I don't know," Steve says into the darkness. 
You can't see him like this. It makes you mildly claustrophobic. Maybe you should turn on the hall light. 
"Hopper said he was dead. So did that other guy—uh, Murray. And like, Eddie's okay. And Max. El would tell us if she sensed something. It's not like he could come back without making a sound. I mean, from what she told me, she basically, like, unraveled him from the inside out. Which is pretty gross, but also a good way to keep someone dead."
He's rambling. He's rambling to distract you. 
God, what the fuck are you going to do when you're twenty-four and unmarried and Steve's forgotten all about you? 
"I don't want anyone to die," you whisper. 
Steve squeezes your hand harder. 
"No one's gonna die."
You shift closer. You can barely make out Steve's silhouette. The ends of his hair tickle your knuckles. 
"Hey," he says, and you try to find his eyes, but you can't. "Nothing's gonna happen, okay?" 
"Yeah," you say, even though something did happen, something that almost took him away from you, and you don't know if you can handle that again. 
"You can stay here as long as you want," he says. 
"I can go back to my room."
Steve threads his fingers with yours. You can't see his eyes but it's okay.
"Don't," he says. 
"Okay."
You scoot forward, closing another few inches between you two. Now, you feel Steve's breath on your face. He smells like minty toothpaste. He is alive. 
The rain batters against the windows. You could kiss him. You could kiss him right now, and no one would know except for you and him. 
His breath has begun to even out. You lean in blindly. Your lips land on his hair. 
It's hardly a kiss. It’ll be your secret anyway.
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+ and, finally, the first.
"Dustin wanted chocolate milk," you say, not looking up from the tub of yogurt you're searching the date for. 
"Yeah," Steve says, parking the cart to the side. "Kid's addicted."
He opens the giant fridge door and a burst of cold air nips at your arm. You shy away. 
"Six dollars? Jesus, does it come from gold cows?"
You snort, finally putting the yogurt in the cart. You stay at Steve’s house more often than not these days, so there’s no point in getting a separate cart.
"What?" Steve asks, looking at you. 
"You're funny, that's what."
"I am?"
"You sound like somebody's grandpa."
"I do not!"
"Do too," you say sweetly. 
"Do not."
"Do too infinity."
Steve rolls his eyes. 
"Yeah, whatever. I'm a grandpa 'cause I don't wanna spend a leg and an arm on chocolate milk for the little shit? So be it."
"Steve," you begin, eyebrows drawing together. "It's his birthday. Have a heart, old man." 
"Oh, good grief," he mumbles, but he takes the carton and puts it into the cart. 
You smile. Steve shakes his head. 
"This is why I don't go shopping with you. You're an enabler."
"I am," you say happily, walking alongside him as he pushes the cart. 
"And you don't push the cart."
You tut. "Pretty girls don't push shopping carts, Steven." 
"Oh, they just find some poor sap to push it for them, huh?" 
"I'm so glad you're on board," you say, skipping ahead to the chip aisle. 
You look through the shelves and land on two types of Doritos. Cool Ranch and Original. It’s a tough decision.
“Steve, what do you think?” You hold up the bags. “Which do they like better?”
“Ranch. According to Mike, liking the original flavors of snacks is lame.”
You snicker and take three bags of the Cool Ranch. Steve pushes the cart to you. 
“I feel like we’re shopping for our kid,” you say. “We’re the awesome house everybody wants to visit because we have the best snacks and the biggest pool.”
You look up when Steve doesn’t reply. He stares at you, expression unreadable. Your smile dims.
“What?” you ask.
Steve shakes his head.
“Nothing,” he says quietly. “It’s nothing.”
“Steve, seriously. What is it?”
He shakes his head again. 
“Nothing, really. Just zoned out for a second.”
He continues to push the cart down the aisle. You watch him for a moment, then follow. The two of you quickly check off the remaining items on Steve’s list (yes, his actual, physical grocery list), and then you check out.
The cashier smiles at you both in line. She’s an older woman, with the typical poofy blowout nearly every woman over fifty gets at Brenda’s Salon in downtown Hawkins. You busily put the items on the conveyor belt while Steve takes out his wallet and makes conversation with the cashier. It’s a good routine you two have established. 
When the cashier’s done, you squeeze past the cart and grab half of the bags. Steve takes the receipt and the rest of the bags.
“You two are very sweet together,” the cashier says, her round cheeks blush-red like apples. “Have a wonderful day.”
“You too, ma’am,” Steve replies, and heads to the exit.
You’re frozen for a moment, startled until Steve calls your name. You heft the bags in your arms and hurry after him. 
Steve stops and takes two of your bags before crossing the parking lot. 
“Steve,” you say, and huff. “I can carry them.”
“Pretty girls don’t push carts or carry bags. It’s the rule, remember?”
You watch, unimpressed, as Steve then proceeds to try and get his car keys with an armful of grocery bags. When he almost drops a bag for the third time, you sigh and take pity. 
“Which pocket?” you ask, snaking your arm around.
“Back left,” he says, smiling sheepishly.
You roll your eyes, feeling disgustingly fond. You shove your hand down Steve’s back jean pocket. He wiggles his eyebrows at you.
“Take me out to dinner at least,” he says.
“Pretty boys don’t get taken to dinner until the pretty girl has been asked out properly,” you shoot back. 
Steve smiles, but the joke doesn’t land like it usually does. You step away as soon as you get the keys, clearing your throat. 
“Well, I hope you’ve learned your lesson about carrying all the bags, Popeye.”
You open the trunk for him, then go to open the passenger side door.
“If I don’t carry all the bags, how else am I meant to show off to the ladies?”
You pull the handle on the driver’s side for Steve and he gets in, beaming cheekily at you.
“The only person who’s watching you make a fool of yourself is me, big guy,” you say. “So, mission failed.”
You open the glove compartment and start fishing through for gum. You find a Juicy Fruit packet but it’s empty. 
“Damn, that’s what we forgot,” you say, defeatedly crumpling the cardboard. “Gum.”
You start to turn to Steve. “Do you think we—”
You’ve wondered, probably more than you should, about how Steve Harrington kisses. 
Now you know: tenderly. 
He cups both sides of your face, and you have to brace yourself on the center console for balance. Your other hand tangles in his hair. It’s as soft as you imagined, free of product, and you scrunch the baby hairs at the base of his scalp. Steve makes a quiet noise. 
You kiss until you need air. Even then, Steve doesn’t let you go far. You part with only an inch or two between you. 
“There’s gum in the middle compartment,” is the first thing he says.
“Huh?”
“In here.” He pats the compartment between the seats. “Hubba Bubba. I got it last week.”
You giggle and grab Steve’s face with both hands. His hands slip to your arms and he squeezes, smiling gently.
“What?” he asks.
“Fuck, I’m glad I know you,” you say. 
Steve kisses you again. Two. Steve Harrington has officially kissed you two times. 
You hope you’ll lose track at some point.
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unicorn-gallerexy · 1 month
Text
Howdy, I totally mean to post more and didn't do any of that but then i got stuck with this idea and getting it out so here ya go, i want it out my face. There will be part 2, but i need a break bc this too so long and is longer than i wanted it. Only mildly proofread, rada rada, yknow the drill
Word count: 12.7K (i managed to hit the end of like 3 keep notes, i ain't ever done that)
CW: (technical) Homewrecker!Atsumu x Wife! Reader, smut, (kinda/justified) cheating, manipulation and mild threats (not from Atsumu), open marriage (you weren't vibing with it), trash treatment from husband, Long af, Atsumu being mad bc wtf is up with your husband?
One for Another
When your husband asked his question, excited just after coming home, you thought you couldn't hear. Or maybe it was that you didn't understand?
Either way, you asked him to repeat himself.
"I want to open our relationship. It sounds like a good idea, yeah?" He smiles, like there's nothing wrong with his sudden asking, and the look you give him is blank before it obviously reads upset.
"Why?" You steady your voice a lot easier than you steady your mind. You were hurt, this was so out of the blue. Yes, he had voiced a bit of an issue with your extra few pounds, or how you didn't dress up more often, or how you didn't have as much sex anymore (which was more his fault but he blamed you and the weight you put on) but you were working in it. You started working out in your own home because he was insistent that other people, like his coworkers, could see you let yourself go. You worked on being consistent with skincare and wearing more clothes that flattered you. You were actually looking quite a bit better than you had before. At least you and your friends thought so...
"Because it's a great idea?" He says it so easy as if you should be understanding. Seeing as you don't look pleased, his smile drops and he heaves a sigh so heavy at the thought of explaining himself. "Look you and i haven't... Been on the same page for a while. You and I just aren't matching up right now, so i figured it would be good to open the relationship so we can fill in those gaps."
"What gaps? I've been working on myself for damn near two months now, solely because you asked. What am i not doing for you?"
"Jesus Christ, this isn't about you. It's about us being happy, and im not happy. Im also not just trying to leave you high and dry but im sure you're not happy either." He says the part about you not being happy as if it doesn't matter to him. His emphasis was on him not being happy, and the part of not leaving you sounded more like a chore than a willful choice.
He swept you off your feet and promised a life a comfort. He was working on a promotion, he complimented you regularly and the sex wasn't bad at all. You fell for his charm easy, and he seemingly fell for you just as hard. After a few years, he asked you to marry him and made it known you could depend on him completely. Your job was basically down the drain by the time the wedding happened due to higher positions deciding the right way didn't make them enough money fast enough. He said you could trust him to take care of you, that he'd keep you happy and comfy, that he didn't mind a housewife for a while. You let yourself fall into that role, it wasn't hard. The house he bought was sizeable but not too big, the chore list was never too long and you did indeed live comfortably.
Over time, through his several promotions to an executive seat, you moved into bigger and better, all while he coaxed you into being his lovely little housewife and homemaker. Anytime you talked of going back, he'd mention how the job market wasn't the best, reports of customers abusing staff locally, rumors he "heard" here or there about owners and managers of places you were looking into, and always mentioning how you complained of every job you had. How you hated working, but how you were basically just taking care of yourself and he was taking care of you by working and giving you a card of his he didn't need to keep track of.
This was more temporary than you thought it was.
In the last two promotions, he had been given an assistant that always seemed a little too close for comfort. If you ever brought it up, he'd only mention how he married you and how she worked for him, so he couldn't be cheating on you. He blamed your insecurities and said you were forcing your own self doubt on him, and how that wasn't fair. At first the responses seemed loving, in their own way, before they turned angry. He'd shout about you being insecure, how you were trying to accuse him of things you had no proof of. He'd leave the house and even when he came back, he rarely ever apologized. He'd simply place more money onto the card and talk to you as he normally would. He pretended to care with a kiss on the forehead and half holding you in bed every so often.
That didn't stop him from pointing out your mounting flaws over time. It didn't stop him from refusing any sort of advances you made, day off or not. Didn't stop him not inviting you to company events as he had in the past and instead saying he was going with *her instead because "family isn't invited this time around" as if there weren't pictures posted later of his coworkers with their wives who you know don't work for the company at the same event.
You would've left a long time ago, really. But he wasn't wrong in saying you were insecure. Or that he'd leave you high and dry. He managed to manipulate you into not having a job for years, which doesn't look the greatest when applying for new ones, which created your dependency on him for financial reasons but he also had preyed on the parts of yourself you couldn't stand, made you feel like he and he alone loved you, like no one else would or could love you. You defended his words when your friends brought up concern by citing that he was right, as no one had really come up to you to flirt or asked you out prior to him so there wasn't really much competition for you. And, at the time, he at least liked you.
All for it to be thrown back in your face now. The waves of realization hit like you're in a losing boxing match. You feel your eyes burn but refuse to let any tears fall. He, unfortunate as it may be, can still read you at least a little. He comes and wraps his arms around you in a hug that makes you feel slimy, but you don't pull away as there's no where else to go really. "Listen baby, this isn't just a good thing for me. It's a good decision for both of us. I'm not giving you what you want, you aren't giving me what i want, don't you think it's better to find those things in other people and still have each other to come home to? At least give it a shot." He insists. It's obvious to you now, he doesn't care about you finding someone, only about him being allowed to do as he wants without being called a name that fits.
Part of you want to ask, but you figure you won't get answers if you do. You feel backed into a corner with no real way to lash out. So, you give a reluctant and strained yes, giving in to your defeat in hopes it hurts a little less. He kiss the back of your head and quickly slips away from you, grabbing his keys and saying something about being back later before slipping out of the door. You hear it lock, you hear the car start and drive off, and looking at the time on the clock in the stove behind you, it now reads 7:38pm. You could swear he turned his head to look at it when he was behind you.
The weekend comes in shortly after, he says he's going on a trip and you don't bother to ask where to or when he'll be back. You're already distant and its only been a few days, not that he cares at all. He packs and leaves in a hurry, only sending a text of "I love you" about an hour later. You've yet to tell anyone, feeling overwhelmed with shame and stupidity at not seeing any signs earlier on to avoid this. Or maybe because you feel ashamed that you couldn't keep your husband satisfied? That he was seduced by someone you'd consider younger and prettier than you'll ever be. You're not that old, nor are you bad looking but that's not how you see it. Your eyes only seem to find more and more inadequacies each time you look into a mirror. From the bags darkening under your eyes to your hair becoming more tangled with your lack of care, from the flaring breakouts across your face from stress and ditching your routine to the weight you worked off coming back with friends because you wallow on the couch and dropped your workout routine.
What was the point?
You had nothing else to work towards. Sure you barely looked different from before him, and if you got back into all of it, you'd look basically the same as you did then, maybe a bit better, but what would be the point? No one wanted you before he did, he literally had no competition for your affection or attention. The only thing that's changed that you can't undo is the passing of time. Sure, in the grand scheme of things you really weren't that much older than you were then but, if no one wanted you then, who would want you now?
You couldn't give an answer, and thus your brain concluded with: no one.
You eventually wind up inviting friends over about 2 weeks into his trip and, not having heard from you for longer, they jump at the chance to see you. When they arrive, and you answer the door, disheveled in sweats, they can see that you're not holding up well and the sweet smiles and loud hi's drop. Being asked what's wrong sets off the water works, not having cried in or out of his presence made the dam behind your eyes too full, and concerned friendly voices opened the gates. You step aside to let them in and they immediately hug you, telling you to calm down enough to at least tell them what's wrong but the sobs are violent, shaking your body completely and taking the strength from your legs. They guide you to the couch, sit at your sides and tell you to cry it out, seeing as every time you try and speak, it's unintelligible.
When you manage to calm yourself enough in your friends arms, you don't lift your gaze from the floor, explaining why you haven't answered calls or texts and why you just spent a literal hour crying into them. To say their furious is an understatement. They shout question after question, most at how he could do this and feel nothing. You cry into your hands, and that's when they calm down, starting to throw suggestions, the first being divorce. You remind them of how he basically holds all your financials, your place to live, and a solid position in his company. Your friends sigh as they realize that leaving, at least now, isn't a real option. After a moment of quiet thinking, and soft sniffles, your first best friend grabs you by both shoulders with a smile. "Open relationship, right? That means you can also do what you want. We can get you back on track with all your routines and go out, take you with us on singles night!" She's beaming even if you don't look the most into the idea, your other best friend seeming to voice your thoughts for you.
"As if he'll actually let her have another relationship outside of him with no repercussions. Be real, May. He'd flip his shit because he just wanted to go out and fuck anything that breathes without being called a cheater" May pouts, having already thought of that in a more minor capacity.
"I figured that, Kura. We don't have to tell him shit. He's not even being that discreet about it, with the 2 of us helping her out, he'll never know." She leans to speak over your shoulder to Kura before looking back at you with soft, loving, hopeful eyes that you feel you haven't experienced in a while. "Maybe we can actually find you a real man who'll treat you right and wont do this shit. You don't deserve to just wallow here by your self." Her hands cup your face as she awaits an answer and you shake your head in her hands.
"No one wanted me before, May. Who's gonna want me now? I'm older and-"
"Still hot, at least when you're not distressed." Kura says from behind you, smiling with some sort of support for the plan. You shake your head as May keeps hold of you.
"Okay but everything is here, workout equipment and-"
"We'll take you to the gym with us! Kura has been wanting to get in there for a while but she keeps bailing on me. I'll take you two with me and then we're all obligated to go. We'll go on spa days, I'll call you so you don't have to acknowledge him while you do your routine here. Trust me, thought out much more than you think." May beams, Kura chiming in about possibly just moving rooms so you have space if you haven't already. Both paw at you and basically beg, saying it'll at least be good just to get out for a little while every day even if you aren't man hunting. You tear up again, and when asked why, you say you thought they'd me mad at you, tell you i told you so or something because you didn't listen when they spoke up. You're given the warmest embrace you've had in a minute as they tell you it's not your fault, it's his. He preyed on you, just to throw you away for nothing substantial. You cry, and say ok, agreeing to go with them and along with their plan, causing them both so squeal with joy before May goes to bolt upstairs.
"Where are you going?" You sniffle, caught in Kura's arms as you look up the stairs.
"To run you a proper bath. We're having an at home spa night now. You need it." She scrunches her nose in the way that makes you laugh and knowing you still have some happiness makes them happy.
The night goes on as they wish, both helping wash your hair and your face, saying you need a break as they pamper you and do their best to drive away the sadness in your heart, or at least distract from it. They help you move things into another room, opting to watch terrible B and latter alphabet movies, doing your face routines together and eating proper food since you've seen gorging on junk food for a while now. They opt to stay over for a few days when you tell them your husband wont be home for another 3 weeks. Both girls help you clean up, do laundry, and essentially reset your home to brinf back a real sense of normalcy. May sits and picks out a couple gym appropriate outfits, laying them on top of the dresser, before they leave you a couple days before your husband is supposed to be back. They kiss your forehead, hug you tight and tell you the day of a group gym trip so you look forward to it. Kura notes she wont back out if you don't, putting a sense of responsibility on you to ensure you don't bail last minute.
When your husband comes back, he finds you lounging about in the other room, only to ask a question you truly dreaded hearing. "Hey, I can still have the bedroom to myself for a bit right?" Behind the doorway, at his side you can see another shadow in the sunlight that bathes the house and a feminine giggle from behind him. You simply wave him off, a half hearted mumble sending him on his way to the bedroom, girl in tow. You hear the door shut, lock clicking into place as you curl into yourself and text your friends. They send you texts to just forget about it as much as possible, you telling them it's hard when you can hear them through the walls and know he feels no sense of remorse.
That was what killed you most, the fact he was doing it all and seemed to feel nothing for you. No remorse, no guilt or shame, not even the tiniest bit of pity even if it would piss you off. You realized quick he didn't feel anything negative about it, but that didn't mean it didn't suck to have such a blatant display of what you could only feel was disrespect. Then again, you're surprised it didn't happen earlier.
Your affluent living situation meant a very nice, expensive gym wasn't too far away. May and Kura didn't live in the expensive part of the city but they had good jobs and kept up with the monthly payment plan that even you and your more frugal upbringing balked at when you got the sign up paper at the desk. Once paying the overcharged fee and getting your membership card, May lead you and Kura around to show you the facilities the gym had to offer and blabbed about the famous and influential people she's seen in passing from actors to local businessmen to athletes. Kura and you keep up as she taps your arm for your attention. "I'm kinda starting to regret coming with May." She whispered, no malice behind as you nod and hum in agreement.
You feel exposed even if your fully clothed. The sports bra and crop you normally wear to workout at home suddenly feeling to short to be worn outside (even if you've done so a million times) and the yoga shorts holding your ass nicely feeling all too tight to be worn in public. You can't help the shy stance you keep as May guides you past a the sauna, pool, and cryo rooms towards the side of the building, keeping one arm wrapped around yourself and the other down at your side. Kura is dressed in similar pants, but her top is a loose cotton shirt you wish you'd gone for instead. May, being the one used to being here, is in a good sports bra and yoga shorts due to the weather. Once her tour is over, she guides you into the large workout room, complete with just about any and every machine you'd need for every part of your body. You wanna vomit.
You know you left to get away from your currently shitty home life but now you actually kinda regret coming. May turns with a big smile that falls quick when she takes note of yours and Kura's faces. She keeps hopeful, taking you both by the hands over to the treadmills that face out of the window. "We can start here so that you two can get a bit more comfy, yea?" You both nod and hop on, the 3 of you starting at the same pace and making mild small talk.
After you and Kura seem to loosen up, noted by you finally dropping your arm from around yourself, May takes the opportunity to switch it up and get you guys through some stretches. From there, it's basically downhill. May is fit, not annoying about it and it shows. She puts you and Kura to your limits and genuinely encourages you the entire time in such a way that's hard to be mad at. You're at it for hours until the final stretch for your cool down when she beams "And we're done! That was fun, wasn't it?"
"I regret.. My decision." Kura pants.
"Fun isn't what id give it but i mean..." You trail off with a weak wave of your hand on the floor next to Kura as May hops up to drag you both down the hall and to the sauna. When you both express dismay over the sound of sitting in a hot, moist room on a hot day after being worked to near death, May assures you that you'll just both feel so much better after and if you're so inclined, she'll take you to the actual pool for a bit after. You and Kura grimace at the thought of being more openly exposed than you already are at one another as you follow May and say you'll both pass on that part today.
Out of clothes, wrapped in towels, May hands off your clothing to one do the workers before noting to you as they leave that they're gonna wash them. You and Kura share a surprised look at her as she pushes you both into the (thankfully) empty sauna. She does everything to set it up and soon enough the room is hot and steamy, her eyes fixing to continuously check on you two as you close your eyes and drop your head to relax in the warm, wet heat. "So how long can we be expected to be alone in here?" Kura asks, scooting to put just a bit more distance between you two which you're thankful for.
"With how long we've worked out, not too much longer. But we don't have to leave or anything like that. We can basically stay in here for as long as we want, though it is recommended to leave at some point to prevent overheating." She sighs.
"With how much we have to pay for a monthly membership, we better be able to stay in here for as long as we want." You complain, Kura letting out a small laugh as she lays her head against the wall. She and May look at you, your head still down and eyes still closed.
"Black card for your thoughts, lovely?" Kura mutters, you shake your head before answering.
"Just thinking about home, unfortunately. Thinkin about how i let it get here honestly." Kura pushes your arm and you look at your friends, both sets of eyes stern but full of care as they note him and whatever he's doing isn't worth any more of tour head space. Kura throwing the idea to take him for what he's useful for and buy everyone lunch after, naming off pricy places your younger self could only dream of going. You laugh at her, especially as may joins in with the new ultra luxury bakery that just opened up and is known to be pure Instagram fodder and not actually good baked goods. Just as you near snort with laughter at their suggestions, about to cut in with something cheaper and actually good, the door opens and causes you three to scoot a bit closer to one another in a corner and 4 actually fairly familiar faces trail in, shortly followed by a duo that you can tell aren't with the prior 4. Your husband's work and you being his previous arm candy piece at work events let you passionately shake hands with plenty of elites, faces recognizable to you easy. The 4 who are making conversation amongst themselves are athletes, specifically the (debatably) most popular members of the team. Koutarou Bokuto, Shoyo Hinata, Kiyoomi Sakusa, and Atsumu Miya.
The other 2 are businessmen that you've seen at damn near every single even you went to with your husband, higher ups from a company his worked with. They were always hitting you in the worst way so your nose unconsciously crinkles before you turn to Kura and May. You aren't too surprised, May did say plenty of the wealthy who live close by here and even some who don't come to this gym just because of how nice and/or exclusive it is. You hope somewhere inside yourself that the duo doesn't notice you at all, as that would help the first day back to a workout routine all the better.
Of course, you cant ever have what you want. The universe curses you by making one of the idiot duo loudly recognize your left shoulder tattoo of a chubby kitten playing with stars from various franchises, like animal crossing fragments and Rosalina's stars from Mario games. "Oh shit! I remember that dumb little tattoo! Y/n, how have you been babe?" He says. You roll your eyes hard enough to hurt as you feel every pair of eyes in this small room land on you. You force a smile and turn your head, giving a strained hi and fine. He and his friend start to bombard you with questions at your minor acknowledgement. Your husband, what he's been up to and things like that. You answer most, half with lies as Kura leans over your back and tells them to call him if they've got "such a hard on for him" instead of harassing you.
Kura has taken on most of your lost bite while you work to get it back, and you find yourself plenty thankful for it. You don't miss the small snorts of laughter from the other side of sauna and neither do the duo on the other side of you. Not liking to feel any sort of embarrassment, and somehow deciding that the wife of their business colleague is their prime target, the second one opens his mouth with venom. "You know Y/n, i have friends who work with your husband. We haven't seen you at any of the company get togethers anymore, yknow? But we have seen him with this real pretty dame on his arm. You make him get a replacement so you don't have to be there or what?" They way you stiffen is visible and your brain short circuts on what to do next for a half second. Both have this smug smile on their face as everyone looks wide eyed at the two, and they look at you.
You stand, eyes lifting from the ground where you had planted them during talking to them initially. "The fact you two are so mad because you cant even get escorts to sleep with you, much less me when im married so you go around saying shit like that is honestly pathetic." Your hand slaps the one who opened his mouth before you can rethink it, turning on your heels to leave at you hear not just your friends but the other men in the room giving them quite the reprimanding as you float your way to where you can pick up your freshly washed clothes. You must've been in there for longer than you thought, as they're set out with your membership card on top to show ownership. You're quick to change as you hear voices outside looking for you. You step out and toss the towel into the bin they have out for them and your friends rush to your side and try to comfort you but you simply tell them to get dressed so you can go and eat.
They're dressed in a flash and following you out the front door, you never noticing the sets of eyes that manage to trail your form as you storm out with your friends hot on your ass, wiping your eyes. Once in the car, there's a beat of silence as they seem to try and find what would be the rihht thing to say after that. What do they say? Your tears don't wait, a uncontrolled sob escaping you before your hand covers your mouth to hold back the rest of the noise as you cry. He's so brazen about it, of course other people notice but the last thing you wanted was to be confronted with it anywhere else. You're hugged from two directions, hands rubbing your back and arms to soothe you as May says she wont blame you for bailing after that. You shake your head, taking deep breaths to calm yourself and taking the tissue Kura passes you from her bag to wipe your eyes and blow your nose before you close your eyes. Clearing your throat, you croak. "I'm still going to do it... I'm not gonna let this stop me... Even if it sucks..." Kura pats you on the back, saying she'll still be with you and May clapping at you not letting it throw you down without a fight.
You get to pick lunch. A nice sit down hot pot spot that's having a slow day, so they wave the typical time limit they have and sit you three in a cozy booth. You loose track of time, your friends being efficient in distracting your mind from the day's sour turn, laughing and eating to replenish some energy. You three can see the door, and have made a game of betting (without money of course) on if the groups and couples who come in have ever actually been to a hot pot place or if they came in because they think it's "exotic". It's a dumb little game that results in fun banter. Lo and behold, the bell advice the door dings again and in walk... The same 4 athletes who basically saw you getting outted as being cheated on. The MSBY black jackles, with the rest of the team in tow. The owner working the register guides them to the large booth in the opposite corner from you and your friends, who ask if you wanna go after seeing the 4 familiar faces. You shake your head, saying you're having fun and betting that the extra shy, probable assistant, hasn't been to hot pot before as you slip a leafy green veggie in your mouth. You're friends smile and agree with you're bet, and you let your night continue.
The three of you fall easy back into yourselves as the waiter comes to top up your broth for the 3rd time, never noticing the pair of eyes that seem to linger along your form here and there. You don't even notice how the same eyes trail you once again as you leave out with your friends, looking considerably happier than when you left the gym. He knows he shouldn't be looking so hard, but he just cant seem to understand. Why would a man who married you not want you or not want to show you off?
You keep to your word and go back three days later, muscles sore the day after from how hard May worked you both but you return nonetheless to join her again as she says you'll both get used to it and she'll keep the routine the same for a while to help speed up that process. She beams at both of your forlorned faces as she makes you both get down on the floor for your stretches.
She keeps to her word, and you get back into your prior habits as your friends remind you that self care shouldn't be tied to the scumbag you live with as they have now deemed him. Your days with them are your highlights, whether it's just lunch and the gym or if they come over to insult your husband in the guest room you've moved into. Your gym trips are a bit better for your mental health tho, having made a couple of friends through May's bubbly personal skills and being away from your husband's revolving door of women. You tend to avoid anyone who has more consistent contact with your husband or his job to avoid any more incidents like your first day and that seems to do you well, though you've of course run into several big names that have worked with his company or him once or twice. You don't mind those, especially since some are constant faces anytime you go to be whipped into shape by May.
Some of the more consistent faces you see are those of Athletes, specifically coming across the MSBY team again and again. The 4 who initially witnessed your sauna incident either didn't remember it or simply never seemed to show they did, none giving you any odd looks or pitied glances any time your eyes seemed to catch theirs in passing. You were always the first to turn away, never catching on to the way one of them seemed to stare. At least not at first. The more often you came, the more you saw them and vice versa. The more you saw them, the more he could stare. The more he could stare, the more you seemed to catch him and while he would avert his gaze elsewhere or focus of the weight in his hands, he'd still eventually find a way to stare at you again all whilst taking pride in the way you seemed to fluster under his gaze. That man was Atsumu Miya.
Of course, his blatant "eye fucking" as Sakusa would call it didn't go unnoticed by the others, Bokuto and Hinata scolding him for essentially hitting on a married woman. When away from other who knew nothing about the information they had heard in the sauna, Atsumu defends himself. "He's cheatin on 'er anyways and i haven't even said anything. Why can't i look?" The others always reply that it's not the point.
"They might be trying to work it out?" Hinata mutters, making all of them turn their nose and Atsumu respond with a "Fuckin hope not." The boys were raised on better teachings so, even if they were reprimanding their friend for his borderline inappropriate behavior, they still don't like the idea of some poor, pretty girl "working things out" with a man that obviously doesn't care about her. Atsumu's typical defense doesn't hold up for long though. As time passes, the more he sees you, the more he tries to find ways to talk to you. From bringing you and your friends water to engage in small talk under the guise of being kind before he's called back to managing to catch you and your friends as you're about to leave some other amenity after making sure he worked out for just a bit longer, saying it was to not slack close to a game, to be sure he caught you at the tail end of your swim or sauna sit. Atsumu continues to argue that there's nothing wrong with making small talk or incidentally running into someone in a shared public space.
"You don't even know what incidentally means, homewrecker." Sakusa shoots, Atsumu having an aghast expression at the word. Though, with more time and the tiny tidbits of info he learns about you personally, the more the insult seems to not matter. You're a nice convo partner, and he's just being nice, right?
Of course, you have other obligations to attend to aside from the gym. You know he still expects you to clean the house, that damn bedroom you can't find it in yourself to even look at much less sleep in anymore included, and make him (and guests he brings) food. You'd refuse if he didn't opt for the coercive method of throwing the fact you don't have a job right now in your face, guests there or not. You just go with it at this point to avoid talking to him, moving away or giving minimal acknowledgement when he tries to soothe you with empty hugs and worthless words. So the supermarket is your other safe haven. No hard work, no husband or women he's fucking, no real stress aside from not finding something you're craving. Crossing into the refrigerated section causes a shiver, eyes scanning over price tags you've never gotten used to looking at. As you reach out for a pack of chicken with a decent tag, a stronger hand brushes in front of your to cross in the other direction. Looking up reveals a familiar blonde headed athlete who seems to beam at seeing you, as if he didn't see you a couple aisles ago.
"Hey, been a couple days. How ya been?" He asks, taking his hand away and gesturing for you to grab your thing first.
"Been alright, resting up before my May drags us back. You?" Conversation comes easy, he's noticed you're kinda quiet so he takes the lead in asking questions and talking about his own things. He's careful, even subconsciously, about asking certain questions as to not put you in a sour mood. You ask him the occasional question as he seems to follow you around, noting he doesn't have anything else to do except his own personal grocery trip, like about his games and team. He has no issue answering, giving the occasional jab at them and joking with you to make you giggle behind your hand as you both float around the store until you both have to check out. When he realizes that the window is closing on the most in depth conversation he's ever had with you, he spings an invitation as you both exit the store. "Umm... Hey, do you maybe wanna come over to mine later? To keep talking? I think you're actually pretty interesting." He says quickly, trying to make sure you don't think what he feels you are.
You smile, laughing softly. "Your reputation is starting to sound a bit more true. You always invite girls over to 'talk' after you grocery shop with them?" He smiles and shakes his head, free hand rubbing the back of his neck.
"Nah, just you." He flirts, and liking the feel of the missing male attention, you agree. He comes and tells you where his place is, and upon looking at it typed out, you realize that it's actually not far from where you and him live. Like, just a bit farther, just almost out of sight due to the curve, down the long street that your house sits at. You can walk to his house. When you tell him as much, he laughs. "Small world, huh? I'll leave the door open then." He shoots you a wink before heading on his way to his car ad you do yours.
When you get home, you don't speak to your husband. This is now normal. You simply put away the groceries you bought save for what you cook after. Once you've rushed through making a meal you have no real intentions of eating, you simply shoot him an "I'm heading out." Before slipping out of the door and taking a slow, leisurely stroll down to Atsumu's place. It takes about 20 minutes at that pace, and once in front of the door, you get butterflies. That old familiar flutter in the base of your tummy makes you hesitate to knock but you're a big girl, so you reach your hand up to give a few solid pounds to the heavy door. His place is nice, you've seen every house in the neighborhood at least once but you never really knew who lived in them. You were already housewife status before you moved here so you rarely came outside or interacted with any neighbors except next door and directly across the street.
The door opens with the slightly sticky sound of the seal meant to keep the outside out, and in the way of your view into the luxury home stands a broad chest. Your eyes get stuck for a half second before they trail up to his face, bright smile already splayed across his face. "Well howdy neighbor." You've heard him speak so the accent wasn't low on you but there sure are some words that really bring it out. You bow your head with your greeting and he turns himself to the side to let you in. "What took so long? I was waitin for ya." He asks jokingly, and you smile as you tell him about having to cook before you left because if you didn't do it, who would? He hears how lighthearted you make it sound, and he swallows the frown before it gets to appear on his face. You're keeping your head high to cope and it makes him wanna gag as his eyes trail up you, seeing no real flaw as to why some man wouldn't wanna be with you. He thinks you're real pretty, gorgeous even. You're also smart, funny and pretty quick witted when your head's not in the clouds. He knows it's a little odd to feel so strongly for the situation of a woman you just met, but his mama taught him so much better than that so when confronted with shit like this, it's hard to fathom. Even more so when the subject of it is right in front of him, oh so beautiful with your-
"Atsumu? Earth to pro athlete, need you back down here, big guy. Atsumu?" Shit. He had zoned out looking at you as you spoke so when he shakes his head and politely asks you to repeat the last thing you said, he feels awful. You seen a little too used to it as you shrug it off, which he feels makes it worse, and ask again. "I said: Did you have a plan when you invited me over or were you just gonna go with the flow and see what happens?" You stand with your hands behind your back so to not touch anything, and he struggles with his mind wandering as he motions for you to sit down and quickly jogs into his kitchen.
"I mean, we had a pretty nice time talking at the grocery store so i figured we could just pick up where we left off." He calls before coming to set a glass of lemonade down in front of you on the coffee table. "And if you stay long enough, i wouldn't mind you joining me for dinner?" It comes out like a question, you've been here for all of 2 minutes max and he's already inviting you to stay longer. He's so eager in a way you cant help but giggle and agree. You watch as he sits on the other side of the couch before starting to engage you in some bit of conversation from before. What you pick up on is that he constantly tries to get you to talk more and he pays actual attention to what you say. Anytime you quiet down out of habit, he asks you another question. The conversation hops from life experiences, to vacations, to upbringings. Anything to get you to talk to him more, anything to learn as much as possible about you, anything to make you smile and giggle like he's getting so enamored with.
He can't keep convincing himself that he's just being nice.
Not as he moves just a bit closer every time he sits back down from refilling your drinks. Not as he keeps trailing his eyes up and down your form when you laugh hard enough to close your eyes. Not when he has to fend off the mild shutter that slides up his back at certain words you say. Not as he continues to mentally say you're basically in the right if you were to do something outside of your marriage, and how he'd offer himself up in a heartbeat despite the guilt he'd been raised to have. Maybe if he finds out just a bit more about your garbage life partner, he can get rid of all the guilt he has. So he asks as you sip at the wine he offered up along with dinner, citing he's not as good as his brother in the kitchen but he does know a bit.
"Hey, i understand if it's still kinda touchy and you really don't have to answer if you don't wanna but, im just having a hard time wrapping my head 'round it." He starts, and your stomach turns as you know what he's gonna ask. But you sigh and down the rest of the glass, feeling It's better to get it out there now rather than feel like you're manipulating the situation later. The feeling of being wanted for a bit was nice while it lasted though. You set the glass down next to your empty plate and turn to face him, questioning when he went from the other side of the couch to only a couple inches away, motioning for him to continue. He ponders on how to say it without seeming insensitive before he sighs and just blurts it out. "Why the hell is your husband cheating on you? I genuinely can't understand." He stops himself before he goes on a tangent about how pretty you are or how nice you are or how he'd treat you plenty better.
You feel your eyes burn. You thought you'd be over it by now but maybe you had just pushed the thoughts away, far enough that it was basically outta sight, outta mind. You blink quickly to get rid of the tears and once Astumu catches the glossy look, he shakes his head. He opens his mouth to tell you to forget about him asking but you out your hand up to stop him. He fears you might just up and walk out, looking like a kicked puppy along with you as you take a deep breath to compose yourself. You open your eyes and put your hand down, speaking before he can. "He wanted an open relationship, so he's not actually cheating on me." Saying it feels gross, and if you took your eyes off the floor you'd see Atsumu with a face that agrees. Not because of the open relationship thing, because of how you phrased it.
"So you didn't want the open relationship?" He asks for clarification and though you and Atsumu don't know each other as well as you know your best friends, he's a comfortable presence that feels empathetic to you in a way, despite feeling like he's pitying you too but that's just your mind talking there. You shake your head, dropping it into your hands to rub away the tension that's building your temples.
"He sprung it on me out of no where, said i wasn't making him happy anymore. Saying i had 'let myself go' and whatnot. I was working on it, really. Working out at home, keeping up self care routines, trying to initiate even though that isn't normal for me. He just... Didn't want me anymore." You're quiet as you talk, a small sniffle in the middle of your statement tugs hard at his heart. Well now he can't possibly feel bad. He asks you about the dudes at the sauna the first time he saw you and lets you explain that they work with with your husband under a different company. "They've probably seen him with his pretty little coworker who he's been sleeping with. By the sound of it, they aren't the most discreet about it so it's just embarrassing for me. They're the types to get pissy when turned down. He rolls his eyes hard enough to hurt, feeling like his brain is throbbing in his skull over how dumb it sounds. Your husband, he colleagues, whatever whore he's screwing that most likely knew who you were and that the idiot was married. It gives the most sour ass milk taste to him.
"And what about you? Since he forced it, wouldn't it be good to get out and see someone?" He asks softly, particularly because he's yet to see you truly conversing with another man in the time he's been talking to you. He's also never heard you talk about anyone else, not that it would truly be any of his business but it just intrigues him. You simply shake your head again though.
"He's... He's the only man over ever been with. We met when i was young, got engaged and married pretty quick but i wasn't the prettiest thing in the group so he had no real competition. When that happened i kinda just stayed inside and didn't bother even after starting the working out thing with May again. I mean, if no one wanted me then, why would they now and I've just gotten older?" Your insecurities have shown before but Astumu's about to start asking some real serious questions about how your husband treats you if you think so low of yourself.
"So why not leave? I mean it's obvious he doesn't care 'bout ya, and you don't seem like the type to stick around for shit like this." He admits its a bit assumptive but he can read people pretty well, and he'd bet on this assumption for sure.
"He married me when i was young and kinda took over most things. Pre and post me leaving my job and agreeing to be his fulltime housewife. I kinda can't... At least not right now." You admit. Atsumu has genuinely never wanted the throttle a man so badly. He's basically holding you hostage so he cant look bad but is forcing decisions on you whether you like them or not so he can do as he wants. Yea, he definitely doesn't feel bad anymore.
"I want you." It's a simple statement but it has you whipping your head to look at him and the serious face he has that somehow also looks like he's bored almost.
"What?"
"You asked who'd want you since time has passed and stuff, right? Me. I do." Your eyes widen as he continues. "I think you're fuckin' gorgeous to be honest. Inside and out. You're funny and sweet when you're comfortable, you've got a good heart and 's all bundled up in this lovely, lovely body o' yers." He starts to smile mid way through his declaration as he notices your dace get more and more flustered. His accent seems to get just a bit thicker as he talks faster towards the end, enthusiasm radiating from him as he closes that tiny 2 inch gap between you two on the couch so your thighs touch. You're shocked honestly. It felt like he liked you but your self doubt said it was just pity, but you also felt there was nothing wrong with being a bit delusional and taking what you could get from a nice man giving you attention. You stutter, trying to get something out about how you feel but he hold up his hands and leans back a bit, never scooting away from you though. "If ya don't feel that way about me, i understand even if it hurts a little. But I would love to show you how a proper man should be treating someone as beautiful as you." He's laying it on thick but you feel he's being honest about your ability to back out if you want.
You still can't manage to figure out the words you want to say to him. You don't really think you'd know where to start, being the way he didn't seem judgmental towards you or the fact he apparently had actual, genuine interest in you. So you hug him instead. He's surprised for a moment but quickly hugs you back, finding that you're so much softer, warmer than he expected this close. He nose catches whiffs of your soap and shampoo, you even smell gorgeous. And your husband didn't want this? Fucking idiot. You pull back after a while, just enough to look him in the eyes. "Thank you, but... You don't..." You start how you want, but you cant seem to find the correct way to finish. Atsumu understands from the way you avert your eyes, flustered and shy in a way he finds all too cute on you. He puts his hand under your chin to gently redirect your gaze back to his, confident smirk still splayed across his face. It's a reassuring look really, one that says he really does want to do what he said.
"If you don't want to, that's fine. I understand, but don't think that i don't want to. Because i really fucking do." His voice is low due to his proximity, leaning his forehead against yours as he searches for any sign of you pulling away or rejecting his advances. It's like a little game behind your eyes plays out before you opt to say fuck it and close the small gap between your mouths. He reciprocates immediately, moving his hand from your chin to the back of your head as your hand begin to wind themselves in his soft blonde locks. The kiss goes on for what makes your lungs feel like eternity, but your brain feel like mere seconds. When the burn in your chest is too much, you pull back and take a deep breath, letting the oxygen take your brain through thoughts of this really being a good idea. Your eyes scan Atsumu, from the lidded gaze to the slightly swollen lips to the heaving chest and from what your eyes take in, your brain says it's a great idea. I mean, if he's willing to give you what you're missing, why deny yourself?
He stands up and holds out his hand to you, letting you take it as you ask about where he's leading you to. "Well i did say i'd be proper bout it, right? Can't take you on the couch first time around, that comes later." You note how confidently he said later, as if he's assured a next time. And while normally you'd say that was a bit presumptuous of a man, you couldn't help but think of the kiss you shared and allow him to have his confidence. He smiles when you don't deny him too. He leads you to a room that's cleaner than what you'd expect from an athlete if you're honest. The room smells of lingering cologne and linen air freshner as he closes his door. He comes behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist and placing his face into the crook of your neck to kiss and nip at the skin as you tilt tour head to give him more space. You giggle as he kisses at certain spots, whimpering when he finds that particular spot that has you slightly buckling in his grasp.
His hands play with the hem of your shirt and pants, gently tugging as he sucks and bites at the spot that has you depending on him more to help you stand. "You can still back out now, (y/n). I really don't-" you wind up snaking your hand back into his hair, turning your head to bring his mouth to yours.
"I want to, Atsumu. Please, lemme have this." The way you whine has his eyes rolling in a good way this time, gently pushing you to his bed before he opts for turning you toward him and tossing you on it. His grip firm as he halfheartedly flung you onto the soft sheets as if you weighed nothing and without a single complaint either. He's quick to crawl over you and place his lips back on yours, tongue slipping in before you can fight him on it. You don't fight with him too much for dominance, more so to just be playful. He takes it, sliding his hands higher under your shirt than before to touch your skin as you fingers dig into his shoulder. He takes time to pull away every so often to ask if he can remove some piece of clothing from you, seeming as if he truly couldn't get enough of you. First your shirt, then pants, then his own. He barely detached his body from yours as he stripped you or himself, wanting nothing more than the feel of your soft, pretty skin on his. When he inevitably did have to pull himself up onto his knees to take off your bra, he couldn't help but take in the sight in front of him.
You're underneath him, as he's wanted for a bit now, neck only slightly marked up from before, lips swollen and a little of the mixed saliva from him keeping your mouths together making Its way down your cheek from the corner of your mouth. Your chest is heaving from him giving you minimal time to breathe between kisses, and to top it off you're basically half naked, the pretty body he's seen clad in various workout clothes finally exposed properly for his eyes to drink in. His staring to you on the other hand, has you feeling self conscious. You take a breath and start to move to shield your body from him, crossing your legs and bringing one of your arms over your chest to hide. He quickly stops you, whining at you, gently smacking your hands and thighs to get you to move them. He settles himself properly between your thighs and moves to pin your hands above your head with one hand. "Don't hide, beautiful. 'M only staring cause i think you're pretty." He smiles at the flustered look that comes back across your face and trails his free hand over the too of your bra. "I can take the rest of it off, right?" He asks, eyes still glues to your chest.
You hum and nod, so he wastes no time before reaching under you to unhook the only thing keeping your chest from his mouth. He almost drools at the sight of them when he moves his other hand from your wrists to toss the garment to the floor. There's quiet fuck that slips from him as his eyes catch on your tits the same way yours did earlier, and under such admiration you can't really tell when, if ever, your husband looked at any part of you with such genuine hunger. If feels nice to be looked at like this, so you try not to let your hands fall from where they rest above your head. His hands smooth down your sides, gripping every so often at the soft flush under his fingers til he gets to the hem of your panties, pulling and letting them snap against your hip as you yelp. He's tempted to rip them in all honesty but decides against it, simply sliding them down and off you to the floor as his eyes rake up and down you to figure out where to start.
His hands reach for your chest, kneading your tits and watching how responsive you are to him tweaking and thumbing over your nipples. He takes in every tiny whimper and breathess noise you make before taking your left nipple into his mouth and moaning at the taste of your skin. Your hands come down then, rethreading through his hair and unconsciously pushing him just a bit more into your chest. They're more sensitive than he thought, and you seem to love the way he flicks the hardened bud with his tongue before he takes a teasing bite and pulls it with his teeth just a little. He's not one to show favoritism in the bedroom, so he swaps to lavish the other with the same attention, biting just a bit harder to get you to make more noise for him. It all has him rutting his still clothed cock against your center, the wetness quickly seeping through the thin fabric and driving him to take his open mouthed kisses down your torso, leaving marks here and there to show his pathing until he's kissing the top of your mound. You tug his hair and he lets his drunken gaze float up to yours, mouth still kissing around between your thighs.
"You... Don't have to, if you don't wanna... Just so you don't feel obligated or something..." His brows furrow as his mouth sticks to one spot just above your clit as he takes in what you just said. His foggy brain has a moment of realization when he sees that you aren't just flustered, but embarrassed. He sits up a bit more as you gulp and raises his eyebrow at you.
"Did that fuckwit tell you he didn't like eating pussy?" He asks so bluntly it makes you curl up a bit as you avert your gaze, hands stroking his head still.
"He said it wasn't his favorite part but he did it because it was expected so I'm just- ah!! Fuck!" You're abruptly cut off as Atsumu opts to dive head first to your center, tossing your legs over his shoulders and running his tongue from your hole to your clit before sucking it into his mouth. Atsumu eats pussy for his own enjoyment, for fun. Your husband had you at home all the time and didn't constantly want his face between your lovely thighs? He didn't want the warm soft earmuffs and the, to Atsumu, gentle pressure of you squeezing his head with them? Because to Sumu, this feels like heaven. The muffled squeals as he slides his tongue from lapping at your clit to fucking your slippery hole and nudging his nose against your clit to keep the cute little button stimulated have him rutting into his mattress. You're overwhelming his senses and he's in love with it, it's a contender for being his favorite part of it in competition with how you taste. One taste and he's actively trying to devour you, as if he hadn't eaten dinner maybe an hour or so ago.
His hands grip onto your plush thighs and encourage you to clamp them even harder than you are now around his head as you whine and keen under him. Your fingers tug at his hair as you halfway guide his mouth where you want him, also grinding your cunt against his face and breathlessly moaning everytime he hums in pleasure against you. He opens his eyes when he feels one of your hands leave his head and lets them trail up you see your head tossed into his pillows and the hand you freed from his locks grasping at your chest, kneading your breasts as he did earlier and he can't help the way he basically growls into you. "Atsumu~ mmphf! Fuck, Sumu!" Oh god if he wasn't determined to get you to cum from the dumb shit you told him earlier, he was now.
He keeps his grip on your thighs, sluring and lapping feverishly at your pretty pussy, making sounds you'd truly be embarrassed of if you could find yourself thinking straight. He lets you use his face, lets you tug and pull his hair in a way that would be damn near painful, if he could think straight either to, to let you throw yourself off that cliff. He's only focusing on the moans clawing their way from your throat, getting higher and higher in pitch until you feel like you're about to crush his skull between your thighs. You call his name over and over, louder and louder until you go rigid and squeal as he helps himself to your sweet release, guiding you through wave after wave of pleasure.
Once you begin to paw and push at his head, he pulls himself up to look down at you with a wolfish smile and drunken gaze. His chin and lips shine in the daylight that floods through his bedroom window, the subtle warmth that still enraptures you keeps you from being as embarrassed about the sight. He moves his hand to swipe your juices from his chin before placing those same fingers into his mouth and humming at the taste. "You're husband has absolutely no taste, does he?" You giggle and move to sit up, a hand reaching to trail down his abdomen to the hem of his boxers but are stopped short by him pushing you back down and crawling to blanket you with his body. He kisses you deeply, sharing the taste still on his tongue with you and swallowing the little whimpers you give.
"Are you not gonna let me reciprocate that?" You ask when he finally parts, moving to trail his mouth down your neck and shoulder as he shakes his head.
"Uh uh, at least not this time. Next time." He assures, and you laugh softly in his ear at his confident insistence on this not being a 1 time thing. It makes you giddy, a man desiring you in a way that seemed so fairytale lately even tho you were supposed to be happily married. He nips at your shoulder and hums when you don't respond. "You'll let there be a next time, right darlin'?" He mumbles against your shoulder. You nod, dreamily humming as you turn to kiss his temple. At your agreement, he grinds himself against you, letting your slick completely soak through his underwear as you both moan into each other's skin. You grab hold of his shoulders as he keeps going, his grunts heavy on your neck as he tries to keep from going overboard. He does sit up, chuckling breathlessly as you whine at the loss of his heat.
He quickly slides off his boxers and when your eyes meet again, or rather when he looks at your face, the smile that crosses his face is smug. Your eyes were glued to between his legs, your lower lip caught between your teeth. He was bigger than your husband, longer and thicker though you'd say they were similar heights. Impressive sure was one way to describe it, the tip pink and glossed over with his arousal that began to run down his length. He trails his fingers from his abs to wrap around his dick, giving it slow stokes which catches your attention. You let your eyes follow up from his dick, soaking in the way the muscles under the skin of his tummy ripple and quiver, taking in how his chest rises and falls with his labored breaths. From his chest, you look to his face, catching how his eyes are intently glued to you as he seems to fight the urge to fist himself faster. Your grip on your lip becomes bruising, the wet plaps of his hand around himself causing you to twitch and pant.
He smiles as he stops, bringing his wet hand to your mouth with a slightly raised brow, a tiny gasp escaping him as you eagerly take his hand in yours and run your tongue over his palm and between his fingers. It sets him off, as he's quickly over you again, freshly licked hand guiding his hardness to your weeping center and mouth on yours with the full intent to make it hard to breathe. He lets his cock slide through your folds, swallowing your moans every time his tip rubs your swollen clit. "You ready, sweetheart?" He slurs against your mouth. You nod, clasping your hands together at the back of his neck, desperate mutters of "Please, Sumu..." spurring him on as he slides his way into you. He was happy at how easy it was; despite how tight you were, your pussy was wet enough give give him little resistance. He only pulled away from the heated kiss to watch your eyes roll into the back of head and listen at the drawn out noise you gave him.
When he feels you hike your leg over his hip and push him into you, he almost giggles at your eagerness. He moves his hands to the sides of your head, starting a steady rut into you before both of you whine at the feeling not being enough. "Please, Astumu.. Gimme more~" you ask so sweetly, how can he deny you? His hips begin to snap into yours, drawing out pretty high pitched moans and grunts from both of you. He moves his face to mark your throat and shoulder as he pumps into you, hands moving to grab your hips to prevent you from scooting up the bed as he starts to thrust faster and faster. He keeps his moth on your throat, grunting at the feel of your sounds on his lips and your nails digging into his shoulders as you wrap your other leg around his waist.
"Feel .. s'good baby. Y'er grippin me soooo fuckin tight- shit!" He curses into your neck, mindless babbles being all he receives in return. The smile on his face never seems to leave, even as he sits up to sit back on his haunches and starts using your hips to bring your velvety pussy onto him, your ass propped up just a bit by his thighs underneath. The angle has you keening, arching your back and grasping at his wrists as a way to ground yourself as he pistons into you again and again. The sticky wet squelch between you drags Atsumu's eyes down to where you both connect, rolling and threatening to close as the sight of his pelvis all glossy, pretty white ring encircling his base and shaft completely coated. The feel of your walls convulsing and clentching as your hips buck against his in a futile effort to keep up with his brutal pace is mind numbing, dragging almost whiny moans from his chest as his hands garb onto any bit of you they can and please.
When he does manage to tear his eyes away from your swollen cunt sucking him in, he lets his gaze lick up your body. From your tummy that he can see bulge with every pump in, to your tits that bounce so nicely, to your pretty face and the adorable fucked out expression that's plastered across it. He genuinely thinks you're so pretty, he can't wrap any part of his mushy brain around how someone could have you and not want to worship you all the damn time. You deserve so much. And he's damn sure gonna give it to you. "Y'er- so- fuck-in pretty!" Every syllable is punctuated with a harsh kiss to your cervix, just bordering on painful but still adding to the pleasure that has your eyes glued to the back of your skull. Your whines and moans are broken as they hit his ears, one large hand moving from your hip to your front, letting his thumb rub your clit and his other four fingers press above where his cock hits inside.
You shudder under his hands, twitching as you let out a weak warning of your impending orgasm. Though teary eyes, you see him nod. "C'mon darlin, cum nice an' hard f'me." He grunts, leaning up onto his knees just a bit more for leverage to throw you over.
And he does.
Your eyes clamp shut as you basically scream, his name tumbling out again and again as he fucks you through it. He's honestly a bit disappointed in the fact you didn't squirt, but there's always next time, right? He does fall over the edge after you do, your gorgeous climax having a domino effect on him as he grunts out your name like a mantra until he can't. The after shocks of yours guiding him through his own overwhelming haze of pleasure, and he finds himself drooling slightly by the time he comes back to earth. His body collapses next to yours after he pulls out and watches your cunt twitch and clench, letting his cum seep out and admiring it as it follows the curve of your ass onto his bed. He pulls you to him and you let him, snuggling into his chest.
He lays there for a bit, basking in the afterglow with you before getting up to get a wet towel to clean you up with as a bath runs. "Oh, you don't have to-" The stare he gives cuts you off as he wipes down your lower half, eyes narrowed at what you saying that now implies about how you were treated at home.
"I just fucked your pretty little brains out, sweetheart. I am not only obligated to clean you up and take care of you, but i want to. As any real man should." He emphasizes what shouldn't need to be said as he finishes wiping you down and goes back into his bathroom to finish up your bath. He carries you, despite protest, and sets you in as he says he's going to change his sheets. "Do... Do you maybe wanna stay over?" He's suddenly bashful, and it makes you wonder if the man who just made you cum harder than you have in years just a moment ago and this sweet, shy, country boy who can't seem to find your eyes is the same man. You nod, saying you'd like that. He finds your eyes then, dopey smile out in full as he hops off to clean his room.
He comes back just when you're clean and about to fall asleep, calling for you as he helps you out and dries you off, admiring your sleepy form as he slides a clean tshirt over your head. He guides you out this time, you smacking his hands when he tries to pick you up, his bed now dressed in a pretty deep grey color as he lets you lay down and get comfy. He's about to walk into the bathroom when your phone rings from the floor, you sucking your teeth at the ringtone. He rummages through your pants to find it again and frowns at it being the man neither of you wanna hear from. He does not the lack of guilt he feels about what happened tho. He hands it to your grabby hand and listens from the bathroom as you answer.
"Hello?... What does it matter what im doing?... I'm not at home, your dinner is in the oven. Is that not everything?... What you do in that house, in that bed is none of my business. I don't wanna hear about it either, not like i sleep there..... I have an attitude because you're bothering me... That's not even fair, what for?!... Sure, whatever. Move it i guess.... No, im not. Can i go now?" He hears you sigh and groan, but you seem to be off the phone, so he quickly hops in the shower before coming to cuddle with you in bed. The evening sun has set, the sky it's deep inky black through the window as he flicks on the tv to something neither of you pay attention to. He wraps you tight on his embrace and kisses your head, asking what your legal partner wanted. "He wants to use the guest room I'm staying in to house his little tramp because she's having 'family issues, don't be such a bitch. She's going through a hard time.'" You grown and half flail like you're having a tantrum, pressing your face into his chest. He grips even tighter, his blood boiling. That man has 0 respect and it shows so much.
"You can bring whatever things you don't want him to touch here." He offers, and you turn your sad, puppy like eyes to him. Even in the dark, under the mild light of his tv, he can see how glassy they are. It hurts his heart. "You can come by whenever you want, too. I'll never turn you away." You open your mouth, voice raspy with tears as you tell him of not wanting to intrude or be a burden but he stops you with a kiss. "Im not him. You will never be a burden to me. I mean it. Whatever or whenever, you always have a sizable place here." The tears fall but you smile at his sweetness, sharing kisses and sniffly thank you's with him. He pulls you on top of him, letting your head lay on his chest as he soothes his hands over your back, telling you to get some well deserved sleep. He thankfully doesn't miss your mutters of how much you like him already and how thankful you are before you're out cold. He places another kiss to your head, smiling as his own eyes close from his own exhaustion. Be it from fucking you like that or from being angry at your paper-only lover, he doesn't know or even care right now. He knows he'll have to explain himself to someone at some point, but that's a task for future Astumu.
Besides, he's just doing what his mama taught him was right, right?
Comments, likes, and reblogs are appreciated! Hope you guys enjoyed! ♡´・ᴗ・`♡
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creedslove · 6 months
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mari bb it’s 3am here but i’m suddenly thinking about brooklyn/qz joel (the phase where he’s wearing denim shirt and looms over people like a fucking goon) and how i just wanna be his girl sooo bad 😫 like i want the other women in qz whispering how “no way she got a fucking sundress” and “joel got it for her” and like bash me “fucking spoiled c*nt” etc 😫😫😫😫😫😫 want those nasty blue balled men at the ratty makeshift bar at qz to stare but not daring to do anything bcs “that’s joel’s girl” 😫😫😫 wanna rub joel’s tired muscles after a day of hard work 😫😫😫
but then i thought to myself “wait… do they pnly eat jerkies ..?” and was like nuh uh I WOULD STARVEEEE 😭😭😭😭😭 but i wanna be scary old man joel who can body grown men with a single arm’s sweet little pea soooo bad
-jerk loving anon
Post outbreak!Joel Miller x f!reader
A/N: my beautiful jerk loving anon, this ask is pure sin, it smells and tastes like sex just like everything revolving around Joel Miller 🤤🤤🤤 also, I hope you are doing better now my angel, and sorry if it took me too long to get this done
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• life in the Boston QZ was hard; more than hard, it was pure shit most of the time, a depressing city full of depressing people who died out of starvation, disease and poor condition while ruled by a fascist government division, it was understandable why it was so terrible
• that for most people, but not for you, not when you were Joel Miller's girl
• technically, life was a shitty for you and Joel, but you two had each other which made things much better because well, you made Joel happy and no one, absolutely no one messed with Joel Miller's girl
• you both were such a good match, taking care of each other and making sure to make your existence a little less terrible in that fucked up world
• it had started with sex, just sex in the beginning, but it wasn't like Joel could resist your body, your touches looking for some affection and shyly cuddling him after being railed by his thick cock and your big warm eyes looking at him as if he was the greatest thing in the world when he could only think of himself as a murderer and nothing else
• he knew you deserved better, he knew he should keep away, but he didn't want to make sacrifices anymore, he wanted to be selfish and have at least one good thing in the world, and that had to be you, his girl
• it was a surprise to him when he found out his fame didn't bother you one bit, it didn't matter if people hated or feared him, if people knew he could kill in the blink of an eye or if he smuggled shit inside the QZ, you still liked him
• so he knew he would have to take good care of you; so he did his best to give you nice things, it wasn't easy but he would smuggle whatever he could in order to spoil you
• so he would manage to get you several things: new shoes, books, a gorgeous summer dress that would hug tight to your body and even a red lipstick he managed to find because he wanted to see his cock all smeared in red as you gave him a blowjob with red lips
• he even managed to smuggle some snacks once, anything to make his girl happy
• he pretends not to know most women around nearly dies of jealousy of you, they whisper and talk whenever you pass by, whether it's because you have usually better or newer things or simply because of the fact you managed to win Joel Miller's heart of stone, out of all the other women in that QZ
• you also knew those envious bitches trash talked you, but you didn't care one bit, if anything, you were proud of being Joel's and that a lot of people envied you, you just knew you would be envious too if Joel liked someone else instead
• you and Joel walked around when you had some days off, it only took a glare from him at whoever guy who tried to hit on you or make any remarks towards you, your looks or your body, and needless to you, you felt so safe in his arms
• he always pulled you closer, kissing your temple and having his arm wrapped around your waist
• in return, you would do your best to cook as decent meals as possible with that ration FEDRA gave you all, it wasn't the best, but Joel seemed to like it
• you always warmed up food so he could have a warm shower and you would gladly rub his shoulders, massage them and make sure to help him relax
• and you gladly loved to ride his cock in that shitty couch or shitty bed and it didn't matter if the neighbors could hear it or not, you just wanted to enjoy the pleasure Joel gave you
• at the end of the day, you would snuggle Joel and hug him to bed, falling asleep in his arms, loving how he very often became the little spoon even if he was bigger than you
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pupyuj · 8 months
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[cw: g!p, dubcon technically but it was never specified, manipulation, corruption, oral, throatfucking, overstimulation, breeding]
forgot i was supposed to be a writer for ggs and not just yujin ya'll my bad 😍😍😍😍 SO HERE, HAVE A SSERA THOUGHT!
so like, maybe you're in this huge friend group of some mildly popular students in the campus and you have yunjin as this cool and funny older sister figure who, at the same time, you also kind of admire a lot bcs she's so talented and pretty and.. you get the idea! there's a bit of an age gap between the two of you with you almost being done w freshman year and yunjin nearly getting out of school entirely, so you find yourself depending on her a lot 🥺🥺 and ofc she helps you whether it was school, your life, your future, your current issues, etc... she will always be there for you!!
and you've become so dependant on her so ofc you would be comfortable telling her that you're a virgin.. no experience whatsoever and you've barely kissed outside of those truth or dare games back in middle school! and apparently this was enough incentive for yunjin to suggest 'helping you out' with that 'problem'... you didn't really have time to think on what she meant bcs by the next second, she took your hand and made you touch that big bulge on her pants and she was saying, "see, (y/n)? i'm well-equipped with this kind of thing... let me help you!"
🥺 little did you know, your yunjin-unnie has always had these dirty thoughts about you,,, and she was soooo happy she finally gets to make all her wishes come true... she was telling you about how she has always daydreamed about bending you over a desk, or fucking you against the wall, or touching your tits and everything that was so, so lewd while you were choking on her cock :(( you've never done this before, how were you just supposed to take all of her in???? 😔 but yunjin didn't actually care about guiding you through it all.. she just wanted to get laid :(((
yunjin completely just fucking using your mouth for her own pleasure :(( holding your head still and bucking her hips upward,, your pained moans and gagging sounds only turning her own more and more 🫠🫠 and the sight of you bent over with your cute plump ass up, humping the air.. aww, seems like you needed some attention... but yunjin has to come first :((( her using your throat to her full extent, completeltly disregarding the tears in your eyes and the way you clawed at her thighs just begging for her to stop or at least slow down but this yunjin-unnie was so different :(( and finally she was coming,, forcing her load down your throat and not giving you an opportunity to not swallow it all...
yunjin patting your cheek and smiling at the way her cum has spilled on your jaw, "good job, baby... now let's give your pussy some love, hm?" then she was taking your shorts and panties off,, she actually chucked your panties to her vanity table, muttering something about keeping it for 'future uses'.. PERVERT 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫
her teaching you a few things :(( holding your waist and instructing you how to basically fuck youself into her cock,,, but she was so big, could she even fit inside you???? well, yunjin wasn't gonna take no for answer! she gets you started herself, putting her tip inside your cunt, moaning at your warmth before telling you to move,,,, and ofc you move... remembering what she taught you, bringing your waist up and slamming it down on her cock, screaming the initial pain and shock bcs of her length 😵‍💫😵‍💫 but yunjin insists that you keep going so you do,, repeating the same action over and over,, moaning loudly bcs it hurt so much, but also felt good...
yunjin taking matters into her own hands bcs you were so slow,,, gripping your waist and ramming into you in a relentless pace,, you shouldn't have expected anything else from her at this point,,,, screaming and crying on her pillow :((( but you were still moving with her bcs you wanted to come too :(( ofc you didn't know this so you were just thinking that you were nothing but a slut after all 😩 loving what yunjin was doing despite everything...
yunjin making you come so hard your legs shook,,,,,, but she was still using her hole bcs she hasn't come yet... and she does shortly after,, but again, she doesn't stop???? she wanted to breed you full of her seed. she doesn't want a single drop of her cum wasted so she keeps fucking your cunt in that same ruthless pace for hours on end, coming inside you over and over... 😵‍💫 and you're not begging for her to stop anymore bcs you've gotten used to her cock.. you always have been a quick learner! 🤭
okay but yunjin fucked you to a point where you felt like you needed to always have her dick inside you... so it was midnight and yunjin finally got tired after hours and hours of breeding you.. and there you are, climbing on top of her, waking her up in the process,,, telling her that you need her cum inside you again bcs you were starting to feel empty... and obviously yunjin will want to fill you up after you so politely asked like a good girl... so she allows you to ride her cock until both of you were shaking from overstimulation.. 🤤🤤
yunjin saying shit to you while she watched you bouncing on her dick so smoothly,,,
"heh.. i fucked you up in the head too, didn't i? you wouldn't even think of doing something like this when you woke up this morning..."
and it was so true :(( (y/n), the cute underclassman was gone.. you were just a fucktoy now :((( molded by yunjin to be her personal cumdump... 🫣🫣
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weebsinstash · 11 months
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For real though I am lost in the Miguelverse rn bc the whole you know, concept and setting in general gives so much opportunity for so many different things and he's such a tasty intimidating juicy specimen of a man
Like for starters I keep flip-flopping between concepts of Reader being the Spider of their universe, BUT I also like the idea of Reader being an anomaly, because then you get that torturous pain of like... godDAMN the scene with Miguel and Miles on top of the train was hard to watch, you know? So take that and you've got Miguel trying his hardest to stop you and losing his temper and screaming at you that you're a mistake, you were never supposed to be here, all of those things, and then afterwards he has to try and put all your broken pieces back together after everything you had experienced completely breaks you, like you go from trying to escape him in Nueva York to just going limp in his hold and letting them take you into custody, constantly crying or being completely despodent and literally no longer caring about going home anymore because you feel trapped by being a Spider and feel like your choices are no longer your own. He didn't have any hard feelings against you but you have to follow the canon! And while he's you know keeping a watchful eye on you and making sure you don't kill yourself, he becomes a little too personally invested in your well being, making sure you've eaten, have you slept well, until he realizes too late that he's ATTACHED
Spinoff of this where he accidentally makes Reader kill themselves which also destroys their entire universe and like a few months later Miguel gets another ping in the system and, oh look a new Spiderman, not an anomaly this time, but still... you? Or, A you, maybe not THE same you he had known but, it just tears at his heart as he meets you again and youre so happy and bouncy and charismatic and he knows he has to keep you safe this time, that he cant let you completely fall apart this time. That's kind of getting your cake and eating it too huh? Having the first you be the anomaly and the second you is a true Spider who gets to deal with all his grief and obsession and guilt and all those feelings he never got to address or act on "the first time around"
Ideas of Reader not even being a Spider and just minding their own gd business and a disheveled Miguel from another universe who just lost his own version of you and hasn't slept for shit shows up all of a sudden and corners you because he just HAS to see and hear and touch you again and he's basically lost himself with grief
Ideas where Reader loses their home universe but instead of disappearing with it they just become an anomaly and now you're a Spider without a set destiny who technically shouldn't still exist and Miguel has to keep an eye on you as he watches you gradually sink deeper into the mire of grief and depression because, "does your life even have a purpose now?"
Story ideas where having a darling/obsession is a spidey canon event and Miguel thought he had already gone through his but he stumbles upon you and he starts losing it and getting real freaky obsessed with you and he doesn't exactly stop himself because he thinks it's normal and supposed to happen, and if you resist him in any way he won't let you get away because in his mind if he doesn't have you, not only will he completely fall apart, but what if it causes another universe to collapse?
Stories where you're a Spider and his "coworker" and you two have tension but respect each other and have never really acted on it and suddenly here's another Miguel who isn't quite nearly as reserved or shy as the first and suddenly "your original" has to 'defend his territory' as he knows enough about his own behavior to realize that this other version of him has his sights set on you and, well, your Miguel can't have that
Stories where having a kid is a canon event and Miguel realizes Reader is a grown woman who is actively avoiding relationships altogether and is also on birth control and he realizes "oh shit if she doesn't have a kid will she disappear?" And he's like trying to sabotage your attempts to stay single until eventually he decides, fuck it, maybe it's HIM who has to give you that baby. You know, just a little mating press and some noncon breeding that he swears is to save your life, it *definitely* isn't that he's totally crazy about you and this just gives him the excuse
You know just totally normal ideas about a totally normal totally sane dude
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faintedlcve · 4 months
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END OF 2023
sorry to anyone who didn't want to be tagged xx
hi! most of you will know me as lucy (unless you're @m3ntallyunstable34 and know my real name lol)
so yes, i am lucy. and this is me reflecting on 2023 on tumblr because it seems like a logical thing to do considering this year sucked like 20% less (one of us is lying reference) because of all my amazing online friends. so yes i guess in a way this is a mutual appreciation post 🫶
@berryzxx you wouldn't believe me when i tell you you were the first mutual i didn't have to be all professional and got to be a crazy bitch with lmao so thank you for not judging me and talking to me like we're besties (we totally are btw bc i said so) mwahh
@longlivestv the loml literally owe my life to you bee 🫶🫶 you are one of the main reasons i'm friends with all of the people i will mention after, so tysm and thank you for being so sweet to me and i love flirting with you /hj ilysm 💗 also if im too young to fall in love why do you keep running through my brain? 😍😍
@loserdiaz one of the very few people i get to openly talk to and not feel weird doing it akshdasjhd ilysm april <33 and youre one of the only people i will ever admit has better pick up lines than me (thats a huge honour btw) so thank you for keeping up with me and flirting with me it makes me feel very special mwahhh and ily and we should totally snuggle by the fireplace you know i made those cookies you like (sab reference) 😍🫶
@weeping-in-the-willows thank you for being the absolute SWEETEST person to me <3 ilysm and btw you were my first discord friend and i'm so honoured about that ajshdnjfe you're so nice and ily and i hope you get everything you want
@theladyinwhite13 thank you for appreciating my unhinged comments and you're one of the few people who deserve to be told that they are funnier than me (i rarely ever give anyone this honour btw so its very special) and i think you might appreciate this reference 'so what if i just wanna be a little out of my mind'
@bodybetters and @its-tortle karo and tortle my beloved <3 ilysm you're like two of the BEST mutuals ever and i was so honoured happy excited (any other positive adjective) when i realised you followed ME back?!? i was literally so ajshdnjfe i can't even put it in words you're like my favourite people on this hellsite (affectionate)
@suugarbabe ajdhhgajsgf my pookie <33 you always stand up for me and ilysm for it youre the nicest to me what did i ever do to deserve you 😭❤️
@patrophthia omg the absolute sweetestt!! youre an angel and ilysm and i hope you have the best life every <33 ilysm thank you for being so nice to me and making me feel valued asjdhajksd i love youu
@theautistmwitch omg idk how youre still sane after hearing to my traumatising jokes 😭 ilysm mwahh❤️thank you for being so sweet to meee it makes me so happy <333 can't wait to traumatise- uh i mean make you laugh even more next year!
@kurtcobainsgreencardigan ajkshdad i had the time of my life 'bullying' [insert their name] (i dont wanna get cancelled yk just in case people actually like them) with you <33 [i mean you technically didn't 'bully' them but we bonded over that] you're so funny and sweet and ily<3
@catastrxblues nadine the loml <33 i LOVED chatting with you and ranting to you and reading your answers to my asks akgdskg im so glad to have you as a mutual and i would love to have some more ranting convos with you in the future haha asdhjhajsh ilysm mwahh <3
@nyctophile-me omg you're so sweet to meee 😭😭😭 ily you're like one of my favourite wives too you're one of the only people i will ever share sab with mwah ❤️❤️ id love to talk to you more next year <3
@magicandmaybe @andi-is-bored @alltheliars and @animallover4000 omg you're all so sweet and ily and we didn't really interact a lot this year but i loved chatting with you on discord 💕
@imperpetuallylost omg ilyy you're so unintentionally (or intentionally?) funny ahsjdnfne and i guess it's inevitable sorry sky but it looks like you (lea not sky) deserve to [redacted] goosebot and it's well deserved ajsjdjdne ily and id love to interact more with you next year <33
@london-affairs literally started talking to you like 5 days ago and we were flirting non stop that's CRAZYYYY ily btw pookie 😍
@m3ntallyunstable34 my literal best friend!! i absolutely love you mwah mwah mwah thank you for being my best friend and dealing with me for 12 years llama im shocked you're not insane yet ahsjsj ilyyyy ❤️
these are the mutuals that made me throw my phone across the room and scream in excitement when i realised THEY followed ME
also i will take this moment to thank all of you for making my year amazing and i love you all so much and i hope you have THE BEST 2024. thank you so much for being a part of my crazy blog i would never have imagined 438 people would find this silly little blog 🫶
@cassiopeiasdaughter @faultsline @underthenightskydreamsneverdie @theostrophywife @slytherinslut0 @imperpetuallylost @themidnightarcher @stvrlighhttt @psychedeliccc @prettybaby-grande @nqds @themidnightarcher @i-miss-you-im-sorry @cottoncandywhispers @svnflowermoon @finalgirllx @fallingforfictionalcharacterss @ashisgreedy @moonffe @suugarbabe @wordsarelife and @xobridgertonblues (i might've tagged some people twice sorryyyy)
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gabessquishytum · 7 months
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omg step up dance movie my beloved. And you're so right, the dynamic of rich snooty ballet dancer and not rich hip hop dancer from "the wrong side of the tracks" is so dream/hob. the hip hop dancer character feels like it fits hob so well too bc it's like. The feeling and expression of self in hip hop is... Very different from the strict rules and standards of ballet. Hob doesn't hate ballet, but he didn't grow up with it, not being from a particularly wealthy background. And he does feel hip hop is a superior form of dance in that it is so much more... Free. And honest and raw and real. Less tense over rehearsed painful movements and more flowing authentic and human.
Dream however. He could not disagree more. He doesn't even consider "hip hop" or "street" dancing as real dancing. Real dancing is practised, incredibly difficult routines and strict schedules (not just around rehearsing but eating too). Real dance is something you devote your whole life to, not something you do for fun in your free time (whatever that is) with your friends (another concept dream isn't very familiar with). Has he actually deigned to watch any hip hop dance? Don't be silly, he doesn't have time to waste on something so frivolous.
Dream turned up early (as usual) for practise before classes and scheduled rehearsal time. He assumed the studio would be empty as it usually was at this hour, however walking down the hall the sound of ... Heavy bass and a seductive rhythm with lyrics to match spilled out from his studio (okay it's technically not his but no one else uses it nearly as much as him so it might as well be) down the corridor. Dream slows down, curious, if a little annoyed, that his early morning extra practice was going to be delayed in the least. When he gets to the door what he sees stops him dead and makes his mouth fall open. What this man is doing with his body is... Unholy to say the least but dream can also appreciate the muscle control and timing displayed here from a technical stand point. Of course he isn't observing for any other reason. Not bc the way this man's hips move is hypnotic and quite frankly down right sinful. Dream becomes aware that he's staring and has inexplicably started to grow hard, which his legging do very little to conceal.
Anyway pretty please share anything that dreamling step up makes you think of !!! I would be forever grateful 🙏💞
AJSJDJFJDBD YEAH <333
Absolutely love this. I'm imagining that Hob notices that Dream is there and the two of them immediately get into an argument about who booked the studio to use, which devolves into Dream saying "your dance form is ridiculous and foolish so you should just give me the studio" and Hob is like??? WHAT??? He can't believe anyone would be so rude but he's got to fight back. He tells Dream that ballet isn't even that hard, anyone can do it if they're rich enough.
Dream runs at Hob, intending to demonstrate that Hob won't even be able to catch him - let alone do a lift. But he's very surprised when Hob grabs him by the hips and effortlessly shifts him into a fucking angel lift.
Dream is unmistakably hard and blushing. Hob is like "You shouldn't have done that, you didn't know that I wouldn't drop you" and Dream can't even SPEAK. He decides to graciously allow Hob to finish his practice session (while he sneakily watches from the side of the studio). Hob keeps smirking him in the mirror and Dream genuinely has to cross his legs to avoid being caught with a major boner in his leggings.
He later discovers that Hob has quite a big following online for his dance videos and tutorials. He stays up way too late (far out of his usual strict schedule) watching Hob dance. He is undeniably beautiful and talented but more than anything he looks so happy! He looks like he's enjoying himself, like he enjoys his own body and what he can do with it. He wears baggy track pants for most of his routines but Dream is still convinced that he's caught a glimpse of a very impressive bulge.
Not to mention that Hob occasionally dances shirtless... and that some of his videos are more thirst trap than dance...
So what can Dream do but show up at the same time next week to see Hob all over again? Hob seems pretty thrilled to see him, anyway. He even offers to share his breakfast (another big step outside of routine for Dream, who hasn't eaten a store bought pastry for... a very long time). And when Dream gets up to start his practice, Hob settles in to watch with a wink.
"You had an opportunity to thirst over me. Now I'm repaying the favour. I want you to show me why ballet is the superior form."
And Dream has never been able to resist a challenge...
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shadowcatzone · 6 months
Text
i was thinking about xingyue child again today.
That in itself would make a great post i'm sure. Anyways:
Xingyue child being a child that runs, climbs, plays... but nobody has the energy/mentality for them.
Tiny toddler xingyue child who runs around and wants to play
Early morning they push some dried fruit into dan fengs mouth, climbs up on his shoulders and screams "how is it!?" And he answers "mhm" because his mouth is full and he just got up.
Toddler xingyue child who hides, sneaks, and leaps at yingxing the moment they think he doesn't see them (he knows. They're not great at hiding), then he catches them mid jump and twirls them around two or three times. But he's an old man at this point so playtime is usually rather short (also they get scolded by dan feng when they overdo it. Like, both of them)
Due to this, xingyue child's energy goes THROUGH THE ROOF whenever uncle jing yuan visits. Someone they can play with a lot? And no danger of getting scolded? Yeah!! Well he's technically a lot younger than yingxing. And even if the child was TOO energetic for him, yingxing would just see it as revenge for how jing yuan was when he was younger.
They play nicely with baiheng. Nobody knows why. Baiheng is the only one who gets the "calm toddler" experience (mostly because xingyue child just cuddles with them, due to baiheng holding them over her head, claiming they're a starskiff, and xingyue child didn't like the experience.)
They don't play with jingliu. Why not? They don't want to bother her. They're just happy she decided to visit.
The first time they all wanted to bring her to a festival, dan feng started fussing and was like "no. Too dangerous. They can't." Only to be coaxed into letting xingyue child come along because there is no way anyone would go up against all five of them, right? They had a lovely time too.
___
Current xingyue child using the ribbon on blades back as a stepladder to get up on his shoulders. To have a better view.
Running up and down the astral express when dan heng fails to entertain them adequately. Dan heng trying to catch them but this isn't their first life. It's the second and they decided to live it slippery and as a menace.
The entire astral express crew absolutely giving up when xingyue child ate candy from the IPC and now they're high on sugar because they've only ever eaten xianzhou sweets, if anything, which aren't that sweet.
On second thought maybe they're just used to dried fruits because of their upbringing.
Dan heng trying to help them brush their teeth but they don't like it so they bite his arm instead. The teeth barely even go through the sleeve but it's the thought that counts (????)
Take two with blade who just says "are you a good little kid? Good kids get their teeth brushed." And they just let him bc yeah y didnt u just say so.
i don't know why but i think yingxing, and also blade, are somehow better at parenting than dan feng/ dan heng. Maybe a short-life thing. Parental instinct and such. Whereas dan feng just thought every vidyadhara can do this/that from birth (spoiler: they can't bc its literally their first time around) and dan heng is torn between his memories, which suggest they can do this/that from birth, imaginary dan feng who lives in some corner of his mind and claims maybe they need some help learning this/that, and blade, who tells him he's stupid for expecting a toddler to be able to do this/that the reason being x/y/z.
Jing yuan as a babysitter. But really he just sleeps the whole time (or pretends to) and yanqing and fu xuan are the ones actually looking after xingyue child. if he is awake he just takes them to the seat of divine foresight and plays works a bit with them
Xingyue child playing with bailu by following her every step. Like a little duckling. Bailu feeds them a lot. They gain a bit of weight every time they're with bailu.
Ok, the stellaron hunters probably not being as involved. But i can imagine kafka holding them up by their neck/tail and asking if anyone lost their hybrid.
Also xingyue in both lives with an azure dragon plush(?) And dragging it with them always, even though the damn thing is slightly bigger than they are.
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fixfoxnox · 1 year
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Anyrhing for a roach birthday drabble bc 1. I love the angst and 2. I wanna eat your writing
OKAY ITS FINISHED NOW YOU GUYS CAN READ IT
Idk if this is very angsty but I'm sure you can eat it if you try hard enough :)
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"I'm giving you a heads up, they're throwing you a surprise party."
If Roach could have, he would have shot up in his bed. Unfortunately the still stinging injuries around his chest and abdomen prevented that. He settled for giving back a quick word of, "What! I told them I didn't want a party!"
He could hear Jackson give a faint chuckle over the line, "To be fair to them, I think its only supposed to by family plus me, but your mom did call it a party."
Roach gave a groan, "That means they're going to make a big deal out of it."
"Yep," Jackson playfully popped the p in the word. Roach could practically hear his grin through the phone. "Hey, it could be fun. Big number thirty one, thats a big deal isn't it?"
Roach shifted a bit in his bed, his chest constricting as he thought about Jackson's words. The man was right, it technically was a big birthday for him, though only the two of them knew it. Number thirty one, it meant that he'd officially outlived his first life. Despite the fact that it should have made him happy, all that it actually made him want to do was curl up in a ball and cry.
He remembered Jackson's twenty seventh birthday, when he'd officially outlived his first life. His friend had appeared mostly fine at the beginning of the night, but at the mini celebration that Roach had held for him, he'd gotten himself drunk.
He remembered that day clearly in his mind. Jackson had stormed around his house in a drunken stupor, tearing up any of his military things that he could. Roach had done what he could to control the damage, but in the end he hadn't been able to do much.
The night had ended with his friend sobbing into his arms until he'd passed out. Roach was hoping to avoid a similar fate, which was why he'd asked for only a small celebration. Not a party. A party made things more real.
"Hey," Jackson's voice was soft through the phone, "You know I'll be there. I'll help divert attention away and give you an excuse for a break if you need it. You won't be alone on this."
"I know," Roach commented quietly, "I know. It just," he gave a deep sigh, "its just a lot to deal with."
Jackson was quiet for a moment, "Would it help if I invited the 141?" There was a pause, "Your mom hasn't invited them, I'm sure she'll be pissed at me but hey, its your party, not hers."
"Its her house though," Roach commented quietly.
"We can keep them in the yard," Jackson's voice took on a teasing tone, "Should be a nice day, I'm sure they won't mind."
Roach gave a small snort, feeling his chest lighten up slightly with his friends teasing, "You just want to invite them so you can see Gaz again."
Jackson gave a gasp, "I am deeply offended by that Roach. How could you think that?"
"Because it's the truth," Roach called over the phone. "My brother will be heart broken, devastated. He's still claiming that Soap and Ghost are acting and not actually my boyfriends." Calling Soap and Ghost his boyfriends made his heart flutter a bit and he felt a grin tug at his lips.
"I've broken his heart by not actually dating you."
"And taken a lot of stress off of Eddie," Roach teased the man, "He's been trying to convince me to break up with you for years now."
"He'll be happy to see the 141 then, I'll bring them along. I'm sure Ghost and Soap will be more than happy to get to cuddle up to you for a bit." And that was that. If Roach was going to have to sit through a surprise party, he could at least do it with his friends.
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Just as Jackson had warned him, when his birthday came around it was clear to see that his family were planning something. His sister-in-laws had obviously been tasked with keeping him out of the house until things were ready.
They'd woken him up early in the morning to drag him to one of the local restaurants in town for breakfast. He'd eaten his food rather fast, but they'd taken an almost ridiculous amount of time to finish theirs off. After that, they'd taken him to one of the small strip malls that their town had, forcing him to walk around with them for hours.
If he hadn't known about the party from Jackson, and hadn't picked it up from their odd behavior, the ride back home certainly would have told him that something was going on. Alice and Melissa spent almost the entire ride sharing secretive excited glances with one another and asking him if he was ready for his birthday "dinner."
Luckily nothing that he'd done with the women was too overwhelming, but he did find an oddly sickening feeling that had formed in his stomach. He'd tried to keep his mind off of the fact that he had now officially outlived his first life, but it was rather hard to do.
He nearly rolled his eyes when they got to the house again. Jackson and the 141 hadn't even tried to hide their vehicles and the thought nearly made him laugh. He managed to keep it down to nothing more than an amused smile as Melissa and Alice helped him back into the house.
As soon as he stepped inside he was met with shouts of "happy birthday!" from all around him. He was certainly a little upset at his mother for throwing him a party, despite his desire not to have one, but he couldn't control the bit of delighted laughter that erupted from his mouth when he spotted his team.
His mother had clearly made everyone put on the hats, but it didn't stop him from enjoying the sight of each of the usually gruff and tough military men wearing bright green cone party hats on their heads.
He could see his mothers bright grin in response to his laughter and he couldn't help but meet her with a smile. Surely he could handle a party if the 141 and Jackson were there to help distract him.
"Happy birthday, baby!" His mother pressed a kiss to his cheek, "I know you said no parties, but I figured a small get together couldn't hurt anything."
"Thank you, mom," he gave her a small smile. A moment after and there was a hand ruffling at his hair. "Hey!" He made a swipe at the limb, turning to pout at Jonathan.
"Happy birthday, little man. What are you now, 20?" Roach rolled his eyes at his brothers words. He sounded far too much like their grandpa used to around their birthdays.
"Alright, grandpa," he playfully shoved him away.
"Hey now," Jonathan warned, "you may be military but I'll still put you in a headlock!"
"You better not," That was Eddie's concerned voice from across the room, "If you rip his stitches Jonathan, I swear to god!"
"It was only a joke Eds," Jonathan gave his younger brother a grin.
"It better be," Eddie grumbled out. He turned his attention to Roach with a small smile, "Happy birthday, bubs."
Roach gave him a quick flash of a grin, "Thanks Eds."
"Alright," his mother clapped her hands together, catching everyone's attention, "Let's move out to the backyard with the kids. I have all the food and gifts and everything set up out there!" Roach wanted to complain about the gifts, but a quick look from his father had him shutting his mouth with a start. There really had been no need for anyone to get him a gift.
He gave a small huff, but quickly his mind moved away from the topic, instead focusing on his team. He used the momentary chaos of everyone shuffling to the backyard as a chance to make his way over to the men. "Thank you guys for coming, I hope my mom didn't give too much trouble."
"She, uh," Gaz glanced at Jackson nervously, "actually didn't seem too surprised to see us. It was like she was expecting Jackson to invite us, though she did chew him out good for not telling her."
Jackson waved him off before pointing at the group and meeting Roach's eyes with a smirk, "They've experienced a southern mothers anger now, needless to say they're scared shitless." Roach couldn't help but snicker at his words.
"Well, I appreciate you guys enduring it for me. I am really glad that you guys are here," he gave the group a smile. His words were the truth. Just their presence seemed to help calm down the sickness that had been pooling in his stomach.
"Course, son," Price slapped his arm slightly, giving him a smile, "c'mon, we'd better move outside before anyone notices we're missing."
The group moved together, Roach found himself settled between Ghost and Soap as they provided him a careful hand to help him outside. "Glad you guys are here," Roach muttered to them quietly as they walked. He gave their hands that were clasped in his own a short squeeze.
"Course, Bug," Simon spoke softly, his voice only slightly muffled by the face mask that he wore.
"Happy birthday," Soap added a moment later, giving him a small peck on the cheek after saying the words. Roach felt his heart fluttering in his chest. Perhaps the day wouldn't be so bad.
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"Uncle Gary look! I'm so tall!" Roach couldn't help the laugh that escaped his lips, absolute delight filling his chest as he watched the scene in front of him.
Soap and Ghost had been rather quickly commandeered by his nephews and nieces as soon as they'd made their appearance outside. The two men had barely been allowed to eat before one of his nieces was tugging at Soap's shirt and demanding that he put her on his shoulders. Soap, despite the calls from Jonathan and Melissa that he didn't have to, had agreed. Ghost had fallen into a similar fate moments later and Roach had been watching the two be used as climbing posts for the past half an hour.
His nieces and nephews had been constructing an elaborate story around the two men as well. Apparently they were giants from a kingdom in the midst of a civil war and now we're being ridden into battle by their fierce leaders. Which essentially meant that the two men were allowing two of his nieces to play sword fight while on their shoulders. They each had a child around their legs as well, the children giggling as they were lifted into the air with each step. The sight of it all had nearly bowled Roach over with how adorable it was.
His family members had seemed content to just watch the show, occasionally calling out teasing remarks before going back to simple conversation. Roach had noticed that Gaz and Jackson seemed quite occupied with one another. Jackson had managed to pull several fits of laughter from Gaz and, based on the grins on their faces, Roach could assume that things were going well for his two friends.
After several more moments of watching the pretend war between his nieces and nephews and his boyfriends, Roach had turned away briefly, just long enough to request that someone fill up his cup for him and observe the breakout of conversation at the table. Gaz and Jackson were speaking with one another quietly and it seemed like Price had found himself in a conversation with his parents, from the smile on his parents faces he could assume it was going well. As per usual, his brothers and their wives were chatting in a group together.
He gave a small smile over the rim of his cup when it was handed back to him, it was so nice to finally get to spend some time with his family. And it was nice to see that his team seemed to be getting along with them well.
There was a tug on his shirt that interrupted his train of thought. He turned to look down, his eyes meeting the mischievous grin of Marie, Jonathan's youngest, and Kinsley, Eddie's six year old. "Hey girls," he gave them a small smile, "What are you up to? I trust nothing bad?"
The two girls glance at each other, some form of silent communication passing between them. After a moment, Marie looked back to him with a smile, "Uncle Gary, will you play with us?"
Roach gave a sad sigh, "I'm sorry girls, I would love to but I'm not supposed to be moving around." He glanced up at Eddie before back down to the girls, "I think your daddy would be very mad at me if I tried to Kinsley."
"You don't have to move!" Kinsley told him excitedly, "We want you to be the princess!"
"Princess?" Roach had to hide his laughter behind his hand, "thats all?" He didn't quite believe the girls and their little giggles when he asked told him that they had something else in mind for him.
"Thats all!" Marie confirmed with a toothy grin. It was quite adorable as she was missing one of her front teeth, having lost it only a week ago. She'd shown it off to everyone proudly as well as the dollar that the tooth fairy had left her.
"Alright," Roach agreed with a smile. He would take whatever else they had planned for him, surely it couldn't be too bad. "I'll be the princess then."
"Yes!" The two girls said nothing else to him before taking off running over to where several of their siblings and cousins were waiting so that they could whisper to them excitedly. It only made Roach more suspicious of their plans.
He turned, watching them quietly. After a moment, the group scattered, running back over to Soap and Ghost. His nieces and nephews who had been around the men's ankles had moved off to join the chatting group, so all his nieces had to to was gain Soap and Ghosts attention. "Hey! Hey! Put them down we have an announcement." Roach watched Marie stamp her foot at the two men, her face serious.
As they were told, Soap and Ghost released the two children that were on their shoulders. Marie pushed them apart, stepped between them with a bright grin before beginning to yell, "People of Dinosauratopia!" Roach covered his mouth again, trying not to laugh. His nieces yelling had caught the attention of everyone at the table and he could hear the conversation behind him fall silent with a chuckle, "We have an announcement to make! The terms of the war have changed! This fight is now between the giants alone!" She motioned to Soap, "Sir Sudsy!" Then to Ghost, "and Sir Simon!"
Even from his distance away, Roach could hear Soap grumbling about having been called "Sir Sudsy" while Ghost got to use his actual name. It pulled yet another laugh from his lips. He felt like his face might split apart with how much he'd been grinning.
"Now thats a fight I can get behind!" Jonathan called out playfully from the table, "For the betterment of Dinosauratopia of course." His words pulled laughter from the entire group.
"The prize!" His niece called out with a bright grin, catching everyone's attention again, "The winner will be gifted with a kiss from the princess!" Roach felt his face go bright red. So this was what his nieces had been plotting. Marie paused to run over to him, pointing up at him with glee for Soap and Ghost, "If you win! The princess will give you a kiss!"
Soap shot him a bright grin, amusement in his eyes, "Oh my, what a prize that is. I'll have to win, apologies Sir Simon." He gave a teasing wink to Ghost who merely rolled his eyes at him.
"Sir Sudsy," Ghost spoke flatly, "I'm afraid I can't let you win."
"A challenge!" Marie cackled from next to him, excitedly jumping up onto the bench, "Everyone gather around and witness the fight of a life time!" Roach wanted to comment that Jonathan had clearly been letting her watch too much wrestling, but he didn't get a chance as she continued, "Begin your fight men! Me and my army," she motioned to her siblings and cousins, "will guard the princess until a victor has been declared. Fight, fight, fight!"
Roach was more than a little curious on how the two men intended to fight each other. After all, he could assume that they wouldn't just start sparring in his families backyard. Or at least he hoped they wouldn't.
He was pleasantly surprised when the men simply locked arms and began to wrestle at one another, clearly overexaggerating their movements in a show for the now cheering children. Behind him, Roach could hear Jonathan give a cheer as well.
"Should we take bets," Jonathan called, "I think we should take bets."
"Five on Simon," Price called playfully, "If you want to lose your money."
"You're on," Jonathan called. "Let's go Sir Sudsy! Get him! Choke him out!"
A moment later and Marie copied her fathers words, "Get him! Choke him out!!" Roach couldn't help but laugh at the adorable display.
The two men wrestled playfully for several minutes before finally Ghost was able to pull Soap into a headlock, ruffling his hair playfully until Soap was calling out an over exaggerated, "Mercy! Mercy!"
Ghost released Soap just as Marie called out, "We have a winner! Sir Simon has won the war of Dinosauratopia and the love of the Princess!" She ran over to Ghost, grabbing his hand and tugging him over to where Roach was sitting. She motioned between the two with a bright grin, "Claim your prize Sir Simon!"
Roach could feel his face heat up again. Ghost gave a rumbling, low chuckle at his nieces words before leaning down, tugging his facemask down just enough that he could press their lips together in a short, but sweet kiss. Roach gave him a grin when he pulled away, unable to contain the adoration on his face.
A moment later and he heard a dramatic cry from Soap. He turned to see the man with the back of his hand pressed to his forehead, "I am heart broken! My chest, ah! What is this pain! I must be dying!" There was a gasp and suddenly three of Roach's nieces, including Marie, were surrounding Soap.
"No, Sir Sudsy!"
"I think," Soap gave a fake cough, " the only thing that could cure me is a kiss from the princess!" Roach could hear his family snickering behind him, he didn't care.
"Quickly then!" Marie started pulling Soap toward him, "Princess you must kiss Sir Sudsy! Its the only thing that could save his life."
Roach was sure he had a goofy grin on his face as he responded, "Quickly then, my good sir. We must save your life!"
"Indeed!" Soap leaned down to press a kiss to his mouth, this one a slight bit longer than the one he and Simon had shared. The man pulled back after a moment, a bright grin on his face, "I am cured! Thank you, Princess!"
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Soap and Ghost were allowed to finally sit down not long after that, his brothers wrangling their children into their own seats to force them to eat. Roach was pressed between the two men on the bench, his head leaned against Soap's shoulder while his hand was clasped tightly together with Simon's under the table. He was listening to his family chat around him. He'd never felt quite so content before. Any anxiety he'd felt about the day had all but disappeared.
It was an important birthday for him. A terrifying one. One that had threatened to send him down a road of panic and hurt. He was more than happy to have Ghost and Soap there, providing him a barrier from that. He knew they didn't know. It didn't mean that they hadn't helped him.
He was snapped out of his thoughts by his mothers excited clapping, "Alright, I've waited long enough! Its gift time!"
Roach gave a small groan from his place against Soap's shoulder. He'd felt close to passing out from how warm and happy he'd felt in the position. "You guys shouldn't have gotten me anything." He pushed himself to sit up.
"Nonsense!" His mother called as she loaded the, frankly, giant pile of presents onto the table in front of him.
"Oh my god," Roach looked at everything with furrowed brows, "What the fuck, why are there so many?"
He felt Soap wince next to him and he looked over to meet the man's sheepish gaze, "Ghost and I may have went a bit overboard."
His head whipped back and forth between the two men for several moments, "You guys-?" He let out an undignified squeak. It was a bit overwhelming for him to know that the two men had apparently gotten him so many gifts.
"Alright," his mother grinned at him brightly, "Lets start with these. Here is the one from your dad and I!" She handed him one of the larger boxes in the pile, he took it from her hesitantly.
He stared at it for a moment, mentally psycing himself up as he looked at it. He hated opening presents in front of people. He always felt worried that he would give the wrong reaction and hurt someone's feelings.
After several moments of quiet staring, he reached up and started to slowly peel the paper away from the gift inside. Pleasant surprise filled his chest as he looked at the gift in front of him. They'd bought him a Polaroid camera. He could feel his mouth quirk up into a grin as he looked at it closer. "We know your old one broke a while back, so we thought we'd buy you a new one. That way you can start sending us pictures again and you can take some for yourself."
Roach had kept a small Polaroid camera with him during his first few years in the military. He almost always had it with him, ready to snap a quick picture of himself or something he saw so that he could send it home to his parents. His first camera was why he had almost an entire photo album worth of embarrassing pictures of Jackson. His camera had broken during his first year with the demon dogs and he hadn't gotten a chance to buy himself another one.
The thought of getting to take pictures again, of himself, of Jackson, and of the 141, made his chest feel warm. "Thank you," he gave his parents a bright grin.
"Damn," Jackson muttered out, "After all the trouble I went through to get rid of the first one," he joked.
"Watch your back Jackson," Roach responded, "Those embarrassing pictures of you are going to start rolling through again. Who knows, I might even share them with the team." He made a point to look at Gaz specifically as he spoke. Jackson answered him with a groan.
Roach continued through the presents, opening everything gratefully. He'd received gift cards from his brothers, their usual gifts to him. Jackson had wrapped up his, now repaired, scarf as well as gifted him a rather large crocheted blanket that he'd made with his grandmother. Price had given him a rather nice bottle of wine and Gaz had put together a large box with a variety of snacks and candy inside. All that was left were the several small to medium sized gifts in front of him, all apparently from Soap and Ghost.
He looked at the pile of gifts, trying to decide where to start. "Any that I need to open first?" He tilted his head at the gifts, eyeing one in particular.
"No," Soap still sounded a bit guilty, "any order, Bug."
Roach reached for one of the gifts, grabbing the one that looked and felt like a book in his hands. He could handle a book. It would be a good start. He carefully pulled the wrapping of the paper from around it, a pleased hum leaving his lips as he took in the leather-bound journal that rested in his hands. It was clearly a nice thing, likely expensive based on the feel of the leather. Emblazoned on the front of it was a beetle, golden paint outlining it clearly from where it was indented into the material.
"Thought you might like one," Soap spoke lowly, "I hope you don't mind, but I started it for you." Roach tilted his head at him, unbinding the journal so that he could flip to the first page. He felt a grin cross his face. Soap had drawn a little sketch of the three of them together. He carefully closed the journal, wrapping the leather cord that held it closed around it tightly before turning to place a kiss to Soap's cheek. He turned to do the same to Ghost a moment later, "Thank you two, I love it."
He turned back to the table, feeling his face heat up a bit as he realized just how many more things he was going to have to open. It was going to be a process.
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By the time Roach had opened his last gift from Soap and Ghost, he was exhausted. He was thankful to the two men, but very exhausted. Everything that they'd gotten him had pulled a grin to his face, each of the gifts making his heart flutter in his chest. There was the customized knife, one that fit well enough within the regulations that he'd be able to take it into the field with him. A small journal filled with drawings that Soap had done for him. A little tea set, with a tea infuser that he could use to make his own blends and dip into his mug. An adorable mug to go with it (it had little frogs and bugs glazed onto the sides). Then there was a new jacket, warm and tactical enough that it could go into the field with him as well. A cute little skull necklace. A gift card to his favorite ice cream place near base. A new bat plush for his collection. A nice pair of obviously expensive sunglasses. A little leather corded bracelet with a metal piece attached that had a little engraved message from the two men on it. It was needless to say, that they'd gone all out with his gifts. It was both adorable and overwhelming for him.
Still, it didn't stop him from sending them a beaming grin with every gift that he opened. It also didn't stop him from, hours later, being wrapped up on the couch inside with his new bat plush tucked against his chest as he snuggled up to the two men.
His family were milling about the house, things winding down as they put left over food up and chatted idly with one another. Roach knew it was late. He knew that the 141 would be leaving soon. He didn't want Soap and Ghost to go.
"Stay the night," he muttered into Ghost's chest. He could feel the rumbles of laughter from both Soap and Ghost at his request.
"You know we'd love too, Bug," Soap's hand stroked along his arm before landing temptingly on his thigh, "we would really love to."
"But your mother would likely kill us," Ghost finished for him, placing a kiss to the top of his head.
"I'm an adult," Roach whined low in his throat, "It's my birthday. She has to let you stay."
"I don't think thats how it works, Bug."
Roach pulled himself away from Ghosts chest, his face grumpy as he looked around the room blearily. He knew who would help him. "Jackson!" He called with a groan, "Come here for a second."
He didn't get a response, but a moment later and Jackson was standing in front of the group, a grin on his face. "What's up, buttercup!"
He seemed very cheery. Almost too cheery. Roach squinted at him, looking him up and down for a moment before asking, "Gaz invited you back to the hotel with him didn't he?" He could see the blush that rose to cover his friends cheeks and he could hear Soap snicker in the seat next to him. "I don't care," Roach raised a hand as Jackson opened his mouth to speak, "Good for you guys, I need you to do me a favor."
"Whats up?"
"I need you to get my mom to let Soap and Ghost stay the night with me." Roach tilted his head at the man, "I know its a hard ask, but-"
"Hard ask?" Jackson clicked his tongue, "Always doubting me Sanderson. I'm your mothers favorite child you know. I'll be right back." Just like that, Jackson disappeared into the kitchen.
"You think he'll actually get her to say yes?" Soap pressed a kiss to the top of his head, then his cheek, before finally bringing his hand to his mouth to begin pressing kisses there.
Roach shivered, feeling Ghost bury his face into his neck to begin placing kisses on the skin of his throat. "If anyone is going to get her to say yes, it'll be Jackson."
The three sat together, just sharing lazy kisses back and forth for nearly ten minutes before Jackson popped back into the room, a big grin on his face. "Am I the best friend in the world or what?"
"She said yes?" Ghost asked, surprise leaking into his voice.
"Just for the night," Jackson responded with a grin, "you'll have to leave in the morning and she said that you guys have to keep things quiet or she'll send you home early," he winked at them after the last part and Roach felt his face go warm. He couldn't find it in himself to care about his embarrassment though, not when he would get to have Soap and Ghost to himself for the entire night.
"You're amazing," he shot Jackson a grin, "thank you."
"Happy birthday," Jackson replied simply. He shot him another wink. "Have fun," he teased before leaving the room once again.
"Quick," Roach grinned at the men next to him, "upstairs before my mom changes her mind or one of my brothers notice."
"So eagar," Soap teased with a grin as he stood. The two men helped him from the seat, guiding him toward the stairs quietly. It was a miracle they made it up the stairs so quietly, especially with Soap's hands becoming more and more grabby the closer they got to Roach's room. Ghost was able to mostly control himself, though Roach did feel one of his hands sneak down for a quick grab of his ass as they walked.
Roach had been worried about his birthday. He'd been more stressed than he wanted to admit. But now, as he quietly closed the door to his room, feeling warm lips latch onto his neck and another pair of hands lovingly feel around his body, he couldn't even remember why he'd been worried.
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andie-cake · 1 year
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NPMD WAS SO FUCKING GOOD AND NOW I'M GONNA TALK ABT IT IN A REALLY DISORGANIZED FASHION
ruth and richie were hilarious characters, and i am GLAD they didn't turn out to be smokescreens for different pre-established characters (...technically? not main characters anyway, but goddamn i was not expecting the paulkins cameo). poor richie, that whole scene with him being like "i'm not a loser anymore, i'm one of the guys! i love life! :)" when we know that he's about to murdered was such a hilarious gut punch, and ruth was just,,, god, diversity win, this sweaty disaster of a teenage girl who gets wedgied to death is canonically bisexual. what a legend.
will branner is INCREDIBLE, holy shit. he steals the show as max in every scene he's in. max may be my favorite villain in the hf stage trilogy, he's as hilarious as he is menacing. he's like. i dunno, jock beetlejuice? something like that. also new ship just dropped, will and jon's unnamed student characters during best of you.
speaking of best of you, god the MUSIC was so great. don't know if it quite beats out black friday for me yet, but it's damn good. literal monster wasn't my favorite like i was expecting, i'll have to give it another listen to pin that down. but still, what a score, not one skip happening once this cast album hits spotify.
pete and steph were once again Cute As Hell, it was really neat seeing their relationship play out over the course of a full show. their "i don't love you but maybe i actually do" song in beanies (forgot what it was called lol whoops) was a banger, and seeing them walk out in their cute lil homecoming outfits in the end put the dumbest smile on my face. also, that reprise of cool as i think i am in act 2 nearly made me cry, joey as pete was a phenomenal choice.
grace,,, holy shit, i love what they did with grace in this show. hearing her call god a son of a bitch before stealing the gun from one of the officers and turning back on them threw me into another goddamn dimension. dirty girl and bully the bully were hilarious songs (feel like i'm overusing that word, but how else can i describe it?), and holy shit, her having sex with max's ghost to vanquish him and then proceeding to go mad with power?? my jaw was dropped, that was incredible. i never could've predicted that in a million years and i've never been more delighted.
me like one month ago: yeah i don't think we're gonna see the lords in black in npmd since this is supposed to be a more standalone hf show than black friday :/. literally all five of the lords in black: we're about to end this dumbasses whole career. that was WILD. their song wasn't my favorite in the show (if only bc it was kinda hard to hear with the digital ticket audio), but i am ecstatic to have canon human designs for all five of them now.
god, i feel like there's more i wanna say, but there's just so much to talk about. all i can say is that after three years of delays, i'm so so happy that we're finally getting to see npmd. dunno how it stacks up against tgwdlm and black friday for me yet, but i'm just overjoyed. can't wait for the youtube version and the cast album, they're gonna be great.
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bright-and-burning · 4 months
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okay yeah i didn't know that there's the different ai stuff and that this is generative ai BUT GOD AM I HAPPY to see that you know the difference between ai and ml like !!! this is not ai !!! it's such a trend now and it's so wrong and so frustrating beyond the, in this case, misogynistic aspects of it. like this is not ai !! but that sounds catchy and URGH so frustrating. okay that's all i love ur additional tags thank u xoxo
yeah!! i did my undergrad degree focused on this kind of stuff (and dropped out of doing a phd in it at the last minute) so it's Literally my roman empire. like. i took so many courses in this and THEN it blew up right at the end of my degree and the misinformation........ chatgpt getting massive my senior year of college made me soooo mad i legit started to resent my field. like this particular use is particularly egregious (why hire a woman in an area severely lacking in women when we can rampantly misuse important computational and REAL LIFE resources to create a fake woman to "talk" abt SUSTAINABILITY!!!) but in general i am like constantly infuriated by AI bullshit from a lot of different sides bc Everyone overestimates/glorifies it/turns it into something it isn't, essentially. (rant abt AI from an AI perspective under the cut that idk might be informative or interesting LOL. i tried not to get technical but i did get mad)
generative ai drives me BONKERS bc it's literally not artificial intelligence. chatgpt is NOT AI it's fucking glorified predictive chat and all the dumbass tech bros on linkedin and twitter who hail it as like world changing infuriate me lol. like chatgpt literally works by calculating the word with the highest probability to come next in the sentence/in response to that prompt based on the data it trained on. is that super impressive ignoring the real world stuff going on? yeah!! it is! it's doing really well and it's fascinating in an academic sense. but then you put it in the real world context, where dumbass tech bros and business leaders worship it as god and where SEO morons use it to turn the internet to sludge and it's like oh god WHY.
and the ai art bullshit oh my god. ok i took a machine vision class right. and like literally one of my projects was to write code that could take in a photo and output it in the "style" of another photo. like as the cs version of a creative exercise, basically (they give u a Lot of projects that are basically write ur own version of an algorithm that's already been written more efficiently by someone else, bc that's how you can kind of pick it apart and really understand it, it's like reverse engineering) to show us how that works. (photos from that project are below; i took the cactus photo and then i "combined" it with a monet. i am STAUNCHLY anti-ai "art" btw this was Lich rally an assignment lol). but do you know what i learned (and what my whole class learned)? it's not fucking magic. it's LINEAR ALGEBRA. it's linear algebra on a truly batshit crazy level, combined with some crazy optical physics equations, but it's literally math. technically speaking, if you had infinite time, and were really insanely good at math (and really really perfect abt not making mistakes), you could do it by hand lol.
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ai art from prompts? that's just turning words into numbers (not hard!! i did a project that did that in my second year of undergrad in literally 6hrs!!!) and THEN doing some crazy math and turning numbers into PIXELS! the computer does not know what is going on. it is a FANCY CALCULATOR. WHEN U THINK ABT IT LIKE THAT ASSIGNING HUMAN TRAITS TO MATH IS INSANE.
like tech bros who are like bro chatgpt is aliveeee bc they talk to it is like. if i made my high school graphing calculator draw a smiley face and then was like omg it has emotions......
anyways. like do you know how many projects ive worked on that use AI/ML for GOOD??? like. same kind of techniques that ppl use to create generative ai "art" algorithms? used to do things like detect cancer in scans before human doctors can do it with any confidence. isn't that so fucking cool???? i interviewed w a professor who used machine vision (so literally the field that is now seen as being abt ai art) to figure out what nutritional/vitamin deficiencies ppl in remote villages in madagascar are likely to have based on SATELLITE IMAGERY. so that the overworked underfunded public health ministry could more easily meet their needs without necessarily having to do expensive testing on everyone! i mean, shit, i've worked on really cool sports analytics projects using machine vision. that's not exactly saving lives lol but like. just goes to show how many positive applications there are!
in terms of chatgpt vibes like. i've worked on natural language processing! it has so much more potential than spitting out misinformation!! silly projects for classes, like classifying what political party a politician belonged to based on their tweets, but also more serious stuff in the research i did, like analyzing international public opinion by demographic and country on various conflicts based on individuals' social media posts! analyzing covid vaccine opinions based on demographics, and how to encourage vaccination rates based on that!!
idk it's just. infuriating. that ceos and dumbass business majors (sorry to business majors but i have met a Very Specific Type who like to butt into my field and i am Not A Fan) have completely twisted these really and truly interesting projects and applications. to continually make more money and to cut out/replace more and more people. and the way funding has mirrored this kind of interest, in part bc it makes money (the remote villages nutrition thing is never gonna make money. working on chatgpt on the other hand...) and in part bc of like. basically fear-mongering? you get so much more attention for research in these really dramatized fields (and people lie ALL THE TIMMEEEEEEE to get more interest) and it's all CAP. it's BULLSHIT. and it's just to create buzz for big tech companies' bottom lines. they don't care that it's fear based, or whatever. like people being terrified abt the impact of generative ai bc of bullshit headlines and disinformation HELPS THEM make MORE MONEY. and it's so FUCKING STUPID!!!! it makes me SICK!!!!!!
anyways. it's all math, at the end of the day. and i found a job where i get to use it to help people but i still am like deeply grossed out by what comes out of my field and gets popular bc . i got into this bc i loooove data i love information i love finding things out. and i love using those things to help people... and there are ppl using the things i love to hurt people......... it makes me so sad. and mad.
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dino-boyo-agere · 2 months
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Okay, I don't know if I'm alone with it, but I can't stop thinking about Saltburn characters as age regressors & CGs, especially Felix..
I'm sorry, but this man boy had a broken bike, and instead of just.. pushing it to the destination that wasn't too far, (especially not with this long legs!!?!) all he did was sulk and sigh in the hopes somebody would take pity? He definitely belongs in the baby pile!!
Same with Annabel.. You can't tell me she doesn't use regression to cope with her messed up family life, and the fact that she had to survive in the shadow of her golden child brother..
Anyways, here are Saltburn AgeRe head canons:
Felix mainly regresses for fun and to give his true emotions an outlet.
His regression also helps to heal his inner child from the emotional neglect he had to experience throughout his childhood, but he hasn't quite figured that out yet.
He keeps it "secret" from his parents, cuz they wouldn't understand..
Elsbeth knows technically, but she thinks it's a k1nk thing & she doesn't care.
James also knows.. He doesn't understand it, but he places some baby stuff in Felix's room as a surprise every once in a while.. Felix doesn't know they're from his dad.
Duncan has become some sort of primary caregiver for Felix.
He takes credit for the gifts, because he really enjoys the happy dances, thank you hugs and pictures he gets from little Felix. Ducan thinks "if the gift giver didn't put their name on it, they probably didn't want Felix to know anyways, so there's no harm in taking the credit."
He really enjoys how loving, cuddly and vulnerable little Felix can get.
Duncan feels like he can finally raise a child of his own. (He never had time for even a relationship, bc of his job.)
Felix is still a little brat when tiny, he was raised to be one, so it's hard to shake off.
He throws fits, cries, yells or even throws physical things, when something is not going his way.
Annabel knows about his regression and is not sure how to bring up that she also is part of the baby pile.
She found it helps her cope with her mental health issues, she mainly regresses involuntarily, after bad episodes.
Felix ends up finding out and they have playdates sometimes, but they often end up fighting.
Big Felix also judges/ makes fun of her for "not being able to control her regression". He doesn't understand the concept of involuntary regressing.
He has a really hard time realizing that not everyone is exactly like him, that's just a result of being the golden child.
Annabel is often sad/ upset when tiny.
She also gets jealous when she sees how loving Duncan is to Felix.
But she also really wants Felix to like and play with her, she's desperate for his approval and a sibling connection.
At one point James finds his daughter crying, that's nothing unusual, but this time he could tell it was different.. she seemt so incredibly small and fragile.
He becomes her primary cg after that night, and their relationship immensely improves.
Felix gets upset because he doesn't get as many gifts anymore though and gives Deacon he'll for it, still thinking they where from him lol
He's happy to see Annabel and James creating such a loving relationship, but he'd never say that out loud.. he's a little jealous at the same time aswell tho.
Farleigh also finds out about their regression, but is not sure what to make of it.
He kind of wants to take care of the little ones sometimes, and that scares him.
Little Felix giggles a lot, he likes running around and playing outside & in the water.
He's also an absolute cuddle bug, but only with Ducan. He follows him around like a lost puppy and constantly seeks physical touch. (Grabbing his hand/ arm, hugging him, etc.)
Felix also really enjoys showing off his skills, to get praise from his cg.
Ducan has a whole chest full of pictures, crafts and learning pages little Felix did.
Annabel is more of the quiet type, she likes coloring and just snuggling with her Papa or a plushie.
James really values this second chance at being a good dad to his daughter, he felt a lot of remorse for always prioritizing Felix.
Annabel and Felix's relationship also ends up improving.
The fighting will probably never fully stop, that's just sibling things.
Farleigh also finds himself filling a "big sibling" role over time and he likes being the one in charge every once in a while.
He's is stricter than Ducan and James, but he's not unfair.
With Farleigh he kiddos have set bedtimes, a limit to how many sugary stuff they're allowed to consume and get scolded for fighting/ causing trouble.
The most dreaded punishment of Felix is sitting on the stairs for 5 to 10 minutes, kid hates being bored.
Unfortunately he often has to sit on the stairs, he's quite the trouble maker.
Annabel hates getting her plushie taken away, the plushie is still in the same room, but up on a shelf, she just can't cuddle it for 5 to 10 minutes.
Luckily she very rarely has to be punished, she's a very well behaved kid!
All in all, regression brings most of the family closer together! <3
That's all I can think of right now, I might add more later.
I left out Oliver on purpose, cuz he's a creepy little freak and we don't stand him in this household hehe
Hope y'all enjoyed this read!!
.゚。.・.*.゚☆❗only interact if your blog is SFW❗☆ ゚.*.・. 。゚.
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camellcat · 8 months
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scrambled thoughts about s4 bc I'm losing my goddamned MIND
just finished s4 of Doctor Who. quick question: how the hell do you go on without Rose Tyler? I can't even imagine I literally. what.
like once s3 rolled around I really fuckin realized I was apparently very much watching this show for ROSE and her dynamic with the Doctor, not the Doctor himself or whatever else lmaoo
ONLY Rose has made me bawl my eyes out, let alone even tear up at all. I just can't even fathom being able to connect with any other plot or character like I did with her and her love for the Doctor.
I just ohh for all of s3 most of s4 I just missed her so much??? like Martha and Donna are great (well, I didn't like Martha at first and you can definitely guess why based on all of this but once s4 rolled around she was great!! loved her) but oh my god they were just no Rose Tyler.
plus WOW I really got so attached to her relationships with other people?? like Donna and Martha's families n whatnot made me feel NOTHING whereas I could not get enough of Jackie and adored Mickey (Mickey is family. he is. I don't care if he's her ex or whatever. he's part of the family). Captain Jack Harkness my one true love (btw just sayin I really think Rose and the Doctor should've gotten a hello kiss. maybe not the Doctor he did not deserve one for leaving Jack but Rose did!! hello!!! you gave them "I'm going to go die" kisses give them "hello we're all still alive missed you" kisses!!!). idk if maybe I was just so clocked out of s3-4 that I missed something but I swear those two just had like no really compelling personal relationships outside of the Doctor, and maybe like one specific family member (lookin at you, gramps).
the fact that Rose ended up liking Martha and Donna though??? dfindsnjdj dying dying DYING I love that she would've been friends with them both. they deserved to all sit and gossip about the Doctor like she did with Sarah Jane right in front of his face.
also oh my god no one why why why please PLEASE I'm not used to consuming sad media I try and avoid it as much as possible and this show is just. just. oh my god.
Rose is so close to what she truly wanted. she'll have a life with the Doctor, but not her Doctor and not the life she fought so hard to get back. instead she's still still still stuck in Pete's World, unable to travel across time and space and save the universe with her Doctor (and don't get me wrong, I love the idea of Tentoo, but it just rubs me the wrong way no matter how I try and look at it. it feels like when a character's memories are erased. they're still technically themselves, but something important is missing all the same. and that thing missing is the TARDIS in this case Tentoo is the best thing she could've gotten lol). I feel like I can't even adequately put it into words why her ending makes me as upset as it does I just hope you Get It. I don't think it would've been good for her to not have ANY other solid relationships like she would've had if she'd gone with the Doctor but also oh my god. oh my god.
and the Doctor is once again without his brilliant, fantastic Rose.
I really hope she doesn't come back though unless it's on her own terms, because she missed her friends or smth. I really hope she's able to travel the world and it be enough for her as long as she's got Tentoo by her side. I really, really hope she's happy and fully in love with Tentoo and they are living the BEST life they can.
Fuck. this SHOW.
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