They would do this just to spread the agenda
I asked for a weird pair to draw a few weeks(?) back and then forgot... but remember liking the barto/queen suggestion. Don't remember who wrote it tho🤔 Show yourself, it's your fault(←me when I'm throwing consequences of my actions on others)😤
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The commission I bought from @perfusio !!!!!! (Just for extra clarity this art is done by @perfusio !! NOT me!!)
Ughhhh so good so good so good 😭😭💕💕💕🙏🏼🙏🏼 thank you so much
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Being Roommates With Bartolomeo and Cavendish
➼ Word Count » 0.5k
➼ Warnings » None
➼ Genre » Modern AU, Platonic
First of all, Bartolomeo kinda sucks to live with. He doesn't clean, hardly showers, has no problem walking around without any clothes, and none of your neighbors actually like him.
Cavendish balances that out with how polite and proper he is. The neighbors like him a lot more, and he's WAY more hygienic than Barto. He's slightly obsessive about it, actually, and refuses to leave anything out of place.
You'll have to keep your door locked, not because either of them want to cause you harm, it just makes them both feel better to know that you'd be safe if Cavendish's other personality ever came out.
That's another thing that's good about living with them, cause even though they don't particularly like each other, they both adore you and would drop everything if you ever needed help. (they also argue over who you like better)
Both of them would gladly lend you any of their clothes if you ever asked, but Cavendish in particular would beg you to let him fix your hair or give you an outfit. Please.. you can't leave the house like that...
Barto aspires to be a tattoo artist at some point and would love it if you let him give you one, or even simply let him give you a piercing.
Cavendish no doubt has the master bedroom. He might like you, but he doesn't like you enough to give up his dignity. Barto thinks it's stupid and takes the smallest room so that you can at least have a decent-sized space. (it's a nice gesture, but he ends up treating the living room as his second bedroom, so it doesn't really matter)
Barto's room is covered in Strawhat merch, and any time the three of you hang out together, he begs you both to put on their 7-hour documentary. (You've sat through that whole thing at least twice)
Cavendish isn't too much better, though, his room looks like it came straight from the Renaissance, and always wants to watch The Princess Bride, even if he has seen it hundreds of times already.
One of the best parts about living with Cavendish is that he always has expensive cologne and perfume that he'd gladly let you borrow. He's like an older sister in that sense. He also gossips to you about Bartolomeo and his "sketchy friends" all the time.
Most nights with them are usually just the two of them arguing over whether wine or bourbon is the better form of liquor, and you just have to be the strawman in the quarrel because you genuinely don't care that much about it.
If you can't cook, don't worry, Barto can't either, but Cavendish LOVES cooking and will make something for you both every night. Bart likes to complain that it tastes bad but he also doesn't leave either of you any of the leftovers so...
Cavendish often begs the both of you to get a cat, but Barto wants a dog and neither of them can agree on one so you end up getting a goldfish with two different names because neither of them could agree on one. (Bart calls it Laboon, and Cav calls it Ariel)
They're not perfect, but you'll end up getting a lot of stories living with them, so as long as you feel you can handle everything that goes down, you should be fine.
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