#as someone who used to cry

[ba0shanblack]

Joong said Hwa is: “Quieter than anyone else, but when he spreads his wings he is more gorgeous than anyone, like a peacock”

Hwa said “maybe these are the words I needed to hear the most” and that it hit more coming from Hongjoong ❤️‍🩹❤️

#seongjoong #ateez matz #matz #seonghwa #hongjoong #park seonghwa #kim hongjoong #atiny #ateez atiny #ateez #atzsource #hongjoong ateez #seonghwa ateez #seonghwa month #seonghwas birthday #as someone who used to cry #everytime someone said something nice for me #this hits hard #as well #i hope my boy will be happy #happy early birthday my HwaHwa

[inkskinned]

it mattered because when my brother asked me what if this is the happiest you'll ever be? the best you'll ever get? the thing i felt was fear, not peace. everybody thought you were so perfect for me. even i thought you were "helping me grow". i had to challenge every internal clock. make myself more thoughtful, more kind, more beautiful.

i told my therapist it was good because i like the changes i made and there's something so strong about saying i did that. the problem is that i can like the difference all i want, but i changed for you. something akin to getting your name tattooed, all my progress is stamped with fuck you.

it was the happiest i'd ever been and also the best i'd ever gotten. i would still get in the car and think what the fuck just happened.

#warm up #writeblr #i spent a lot of time picturing our future #how funny to think: in each version of our future #i was never myself #i was someone smarter kinder braver #better adept. #who could navigate the way you shouted and got angry at small things and never fucking believed the best of me #i would never be needy and you'd never get tired of me #people usually talk about how we picture people as being “fixable”. but i assumed i was the problem. my idyllic picture wasn't of you. #it was a version of me that wasn't ill. that needed no extra help. that could be your wife and happy #the fact i wasn't happy was because there is something so wrong inside me. it's always been that way. i convinced myself: #if i stay i can change. if i stay i can make it worth it. i can apologize and fix this. and make us both okay. #for the last year i've been thinking about how you blamed our whole breakup on me. how it was my fault for whatever thing. #and i agreed with you. because of course i did. you'd trained me to believe everything was my fault . that you wanted to love me and i made #it far too hard. that i was always finding ways to ''set you off'. #a few days ago while i was doing something else #i realized that while i was in crisis you told me to fuck off and find someone else to get help. and you never fucking apologized . #you said i made you do that because i wasn't being sensible. i had been crying too hard to speak clearly. #you said: you're doing this to manipulate me. #you forgave yourself for that. i had to forgive you without apology. you said you were right to react that way. and then you were SO #SO annoyed. any time i said: i feel like you aren't nice to me. it is hard to trust that you love me. #i don't think about you that much anymore. but these days when i do: all i can think is that im not sure u ever really understood kindness #you were the cruelest to the people closest to you. and most of the time. that meant it fell to me.

[el-sandwhichito-de-geto]

It's PHYSICALLY PAINFUL TO READ now that people genuinely worry about aging and becoming older than their blorbos.

My sweet sweet child... /rubbing face/. IT DOESN'T MATTERRRRR!!!

Does your blorbo even age??? No, right?? BECAUSE THEY'RE A CARTOOOOON!!

What the hell happened?? None of us gave a FUCK years ago about shit like this! 😭😭😭

#Just saw someone freaking out because they're afraid one day they'll be older than Yuji #I'm crying #proship #sandwhich rants #discourse #profiction #proshipper #proship please interact #proshippers please interact #proship safe #proshipper safe #Also WHAT are you doing engaging in mature media at 13 #Shit like this is why then us adults in fandom get treated as “weird” and “icky” by the kids who #SHOULDN'T EVEN BE IN THE FANDOM IN THE FIRST PLACE

[bluesylveon2]

Neige: who's that wonderful girl?

Yuu walking in with the most horrendous outfit know to man that it would make Vil cry

Yuu: what are you looking at?

Neige: could she be any cuter? 😊

#twisted wonderland #disney twisted wonderland #twst #twst incorrect quotes #incorrect twst #neige leblanche #twst neige #twst yuu #I heard this sound on tiktok and thought of using one of the NRC guys #but lets be fr 75% would roast Yuu #24% would do this #the last 1% woukd be Vil crying and getting Yuu some new clothes #everyone find someone who looks at you like Neige is here #twst x reader #neige leblanche x reader #source: tiktok #if you saw my error...no you didnt lol

[cocogum]

Yugo: “So yeah, in the end I no longer have my child body, I defeated and accepted my alter egos who have been ruining and messing around with the world, I saved Nora with some friends, I told our mother to leave if she wasn’t going to do anything, I became king of the eliatropes once again, and I got married to my childhood friend/crush which is why we got a last name now-”

Yugo’s old incarnations: “WE GOT LAID?!?!??”

#i have this huge hdc that if Yugo could communicate with his past incarnations the only thing they’d latch on to #is the fact that they got married lol #past yugo was definitely someone who couldn’t stop moving and was absolutely dedicated to adventure #it would be such a wild fact if they learned that they got married in one of their lives #they have like no experience in dating whatsoever lol #they’d act like kids around Yugo who don’t know how marriage works #“is she hot?? does she like adventure?! is she into life-threatening situations?!?? what about her family? do they like us?! TELL US!! #the first yugo incarnation is crying right now lol #“…is she into old bearded men too by any chance…? 😭😭😭 #wakfu #ankama #krosmoz #wakfu yugo #wakfu season 4 #wakfu s4 #yugo #yugo wakfu #yumalia #wakfu yumalia #wakfu yugo x amalia #yugo x amalia #yugo the eliatrope #king yugo #yugo sheran sharm

[ashtrayfloors]

When other people I knew in grad school read Kathy Acker’s books they were shocked. Appalled. Particularly most of the budding young feminists. I actually began weeding out women friends by their reactions to her books. The ones that smiled and lowered their eyes with sly understanding and touched themselves, I kept. The ones that freaked out, well, they were idiots. Once I read a paragraph from Empire of the Senseless in my theory of gender class and one of the women began to cry and ran out and barfed. No shit. Pussy, I thought.

—Lidia Yuknavitch, from The Chronology of Water

#quotations #lidia yuknavitch #kathy acker #the chronology of water #i think of this so so often #because i had a similar experience in undergrad #but was thinking of it again recently because i noticed a distinct split in the reactions of my women and nonbinary friends re: poor things #(note: i am not saying ‘women and enbies’ because i think they’re the same obvs #i’m just using it to denote ‘any friend who’s not a man’) #so #some are in the ‘smiling and lowering their eyes and touching themselves’ category #like: ‘i related to bella because xyz and therefore i loved it’ #and some are in the ‘crying and barfing’ category #like: ‘i was super triggered and thought the depictions of sexuality were problematic and horrible’ #i mean i’m not going to weed out friends because of it #but it’s…interesting #makes me think of that post that’s like #a piece of art can be triggering and awful for someone and healing and cathartic for someone else

[christakisbang]

kim daengdaeng my little puppy ㅋㅋ thank you for always teasing me and thank you for taking care of me ㅋㅋ gukbap ㅋ

#if u ever find urself thinking 'chan takes care of everyone but who takes care of chan' the answer will always be seungmin #stray kids #seungchan #bang chan #kim seungmin #stray kids gifs #skz #skz gifs #my gifs #cbbc2023 #i rewatched their 2kr while making this and ended up crying ksdjgsg ough they're so special to me. ik ive said this about every chan duo #meant it everytime! #but seungchan...dogboy4dogboy....ksm who will always always offer food to chan first bc he knows chan wont eat until everyone else does.. #ksm who knows him so well and knows just what he needs and will let him cry all he wants and stay with him while he does ksm who when #chan said he wants to be their pillar and someone they can depend on went 'whatever sides u show us hyung will always be hyung' #hhh i just think. seungmin is incredibly emotinally intelligent and chan is someone who will hide his emotions like they're his best kept #secret and that's why they work so well. seungmin just gets it even if chan doesn't say anything and he knows how to comfort him whether #that takes the form of letting him cry without saying anything or going limp in his arms and not resisting his hugs #anw. normal abt them. if u even care

[lordystrange]

You can dislike Noah if that’s how you feel (i feel that too).

But if you’re wishing he’d be gone instead of wishing he’d learn and grow, you’re not any better than him.

I saw someone here, a byler writer I really love, say ”I need that vile man gone for good.” And I’ve seen many even worse things.

And I know most of you would actually prefer for him to educate himself and learn and grow and be better.

But you still say horrible stuff like that. And I get it. You’re scared, hurt, angry, sad, tired, frustrated… many different negative feelings.

But he is too. He’s been for a long time. Living under a lot of stress for a long time changes people.

Do I think he deserves your sympathy? That’s up to you.

Do I think you should stop openly wishing for his death? Yes. And pls take a long look in the mirror too.

#byler tag used to be the place for love and understanding #while im shocked for all Noah’s done #im also shocked for some of you lovely people turning into monsters too #(also some of you who defend noah are behaving horribly) #if you cant act nice just take some time off to cool down #cry the bad feelings away or talk about it to someone #this world sucks rn but maybe they have to for a while #and then this’ll finally be solved for good #byler #stranger things #noah schnapp

[monarchamos]

heyyy chuuya lovers

I made a compilation of every. single. scene. of Chuuya. spanning from season one to season 5, including dead apple and the ova. also its in dub.

so like. if anyone wants

{BSD but it's only Chuuya}

Update! After a bout of boredom, i have created

{BSD Wan! but it's only Chuuya}

#the way most of the scenes are just from fifteen is so funny #chuuya's screentime ratio is always so funny to me #like this man is in 25 out of the 61 episodes and in the movie #he has 1 hour and 12 minutes out of 1 day 1 hour and 54 minutes of the entirety of BSD #yet hes featured in like all of the marketing #sounds like someone is a little favorite #bsd chuuya #nakahara chuuya #chuuya nakahara #bungo stray dogs #bungou stray dogs #bsd #also dont judge me for using dub okay i like dub and also the bsd english dub is one of the few actually good english dubs for anime #i spent two days on this crying sobbing #yes i am the same person who compiled the subbed bsd stageplays into google drive but no these are not the same drive accounts #soukoku #skk #...technically

[chaosandwolves]

I'm literally crying

Look I'm still convinced that Buck did have sex with guys cause it was just sex and he was young but

He never understood/considered that he's actually bi

This!?

This is so much the

"you realize later in life"

queer experience

And then we have this

Especially the first one got me screaming...

It's what we've talked and written about for ages and finally the confrontation with this question will come!

And this:

A sense of responsibility???

If it was about Buck's abandonment issues etc why would he feel the sense of responsibility specifically with this storyline?

You say stuff like this when you know

What an impact the storyline will have

What it will mean to people

and

When you know you have to take care telling this story

It really all sounds like we're entering the Buck bi realization arc

And if they're really doing this

If they really go there

IT MEANS THE FUCKING WORLD

Article here

#evan buckley #buddie #Bi Buck #Bi Evan Buckley #911 abc #7x04 #As someone who had the queer realization well into their twenties #I can't tell you how much it would mean to me to see Buck going through this #And I trust Oliver with this with my entire soul #He KNOWS what it will mean to us #Gods I'm already crying #How am I gonna survive this? #But I literally can't think of any other meaning anymore #I really do think that we're entering the #Bi Buck era

[hammill-goes-fogwalking]

I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI. I HATE AI.

#not dislike. its hate #it made me cry several times today #thinking of how my classmates manipulate our teachers #and chatgpt AIs can EVERYTHING #its so painful to think of it #today I broke down in the bus and cried #idc what people think. hiding my feelings any longer would destroy me from the inside #maybe youve also seen how people use freakin AIs in their exams #the thing is that: #we wrote an exam for which Ive studies for like 2 whole days #this week we finally got the exams back (w the grades ofc) #and ok Ive got a 3 (C in America syste #*m) #my friends who used chatgpt throughout the exam got way better grades (I didnt expect it otherwise) #PLUS #the most provocating messages from the teacher: #“10/10 POINTS :)” “YOURE ROCKING THIS” “YEAH” #💔 #seriously #this breaks my heart #dont the teacher see something suspect in the exam?! #why cant they open their eyes and get modernized to reality. #& they KNOW- the students Im talking of. they usally have bad results. #once our teacher came to a chatgpt student and said the most miserable thing: #“youve been using duolingo a lot lately hm? thats where your nice grades come from 😉🥰” #you get it? #no- this peoson didnt learn. #no- this person isnt even interested in the stuff we learn in lessons #AWFUL feeling to hear the praisings of da teachers when *I* gotta sit among the gpt-students and look like Im a worse student than *them* #[writing this at almost 1 at night] still have some tears. this topic really has the power to destroy someones day. 💔💔

[lesbiangiratina]

Hi :) 1 of my recent curiosity purchases was the guilty gear desktop accessories set from 2002. Theres a lot of other stuff that i still need to figure out how to share but in the meantime heres a bunch of cute cursors, mostly based on character weapons. There's animated versions of sol and ky's too... cool

I forgot posts with links dont appear in tags </3 heres a hyperlink to the mega folder wee

#then again if i figure out how to share this stuff idk whos gonna want to download a bunch of random exe files #for like. some desktop clocks with pixelated jpgs on them. or to have sol badguy just stand around on your desktop #but its fun to me i love these things #ANYWAY... hope someone has fun with these. im using the testament cursor its a little harder to click things but its cute lol #guilty gear #<- please tumblr im being so brave let this show up in the main tag. ill cry #the kat goes meow #gg

[deus-and-the-machina]

Thinks about how Vergil’s story is about the feeling of losing autonomy and control, of not being safe and going to every length you can to build up your defenses and power, hurt others before they hurt you, only for his self destructive path to end in the greatest loss of control possible.

He looses his autonomy, his name, his face, to the man who was responsible for this whole complex to begin with. and finally free and on the verge of death he’s still trying to regain control, casting aside entire parts of his identity to feel like he can’t be hurt anymore. but it’s not that easy. and that human part of him has to know what it’s like to have to rely on. Having to go to Dante, using the nightmares, even the very act of using a cane. 

and now he’s in the underworld, having once again to rely on Dante for the foreseeable future. Just like in 3 they fight together really well, having each others back and covering each others asses, all while never losing that competitive streak. But they trust each other, because despite having it taken away from him numerous times, Vergil is giving up a bit of that control to trust his brother anyways im so normal about this can you tell ahaha

#devil may cry #vergil #vergil sparda #v dmc #honestly...as a cane user that part makes me so emotional too bc thinking im too young or not doing bad enough to have a cane was smth #I needed to overcome and so the symbolism of v part of someone who hated showing weakness needing to use one is so AUGH

[biillys]

billiestevies: the question was “why does billy hate lucas so much?” - i think that really probably answers your question in more of a back-story sense, of why was he the way he was. because - his dad.

dacre @ stranger con, chicago (9th oct 22) bonus:

#!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #dacre: billy was SUFFERING okay billy was TRYING he was hurting he was sensitive he was FRAGILE he was scared he was a KID #and he was doing the BEST he COULD. #because he has a piece of SHIT for a FATHER and no fukcing MOTHER. #except dacre put it like. super eloquently. bless #dacremontgomeryedit #dacre montgomery #billy hargrove #camaro 67 #'torments billy everyday' neil hargrove i am killing u repeatedly every minute of every day #the WAY he says 'That PERSON is his father' like dacre is BEGGING ppl to fucking understand #the way billy is!!!!! is not billy!!!! its his FATHER!!!!! because he was raising with that upbringing!!!!!! #and he had to weather it!!!!! and survive it!!!!! and sometimes enduring is turning yourself into someone that you yourself dont recognise #just to survive!!!!! so that when you make it out the other side!!!!! you can finally grow!!! #and heal!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and live!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and to figure out who you are!!!!! without that weight crushing you alive!!!!!!!!! #dacre: billy was sensitive and i tried to show that through my portrayal #all of us crying and screaming and scratching and biting and throwing up: we know this and we love you so much #m #gifs

[a-s-levynn]

(source)

#sleep token #here is a thing #there are certain moments when Vessel looks.. no he rather feels.. small #i mean his.. aura? presence? but not in the non-captivating way but as in an emotionally vulnerable way #i don't really have the words to describe this but just like on this picture #bear with me for a minute because this is either gonna sound completely unhinged or make some sort of sense #it's probably just me having a little more time on my hand than i should and just want to see things but.. #sometimes he feels so present in a here-i-am as-i-am take-me-as-you-will this-is-all-i-am i-can't-give-more-nor-less it's-just-me sorta way #he feels so human in the rawest sense possible and yet so deep in character maybe even more so than when he creatures or teefs and all #like.. he is just vessel in it's simplicity and without the 'divine' if you will.. simply just vessel #in his barest of existance #a shadow of someone who used to be but not quite anymore #he is in pieces and it is willingly laid bare under the mask and all that bodypaint oh so clear to see for anyone #and that is not the outstreched hand of you-are-not-alone but the outstreched soul that cries you-can-find-yourself-in-me #and that is what i find so heartbreaking about him #this kind if raw openness because the lore says vessel is a conduit for sleep #for us vessel (and the the others) is the conduit of our emotions #and he is there somewhere inbetween the truths #just him a simple human being who sometimes seems to wish not to be human which makes him more human than anything #and that is what i can't describe better than 'sometimes he feels small' and at time even maybe makes me cry a little

[eloquentsisyphianturmoil]

Maedhros built up a high pain resistance from Angband; particularly to the burning sensation. Considering how low he thinks of himself, it’s likely he expected the Silmaril to burn him. He didn’t think he was redemptive, he thought I can take it.

Part of why Maedhros acts so viciously is because that’s how life treated him. I can take it if my brothers die. I can take it if I’m damned for eternity. I can take it if everybody thinks I’m a monster.

He’s proud, and he’s suffering. He won’t back down, he will succeed or be martyred.

#Alexis rants #Swear I could hear my English teacher snapping at me to avoid passive voice while writing this #I have been thinking thoughts #Something so miserable and ghastly about someone who says ‘I know this is wrong #and I don’t care’ #And the anarchic part of me is saying it’s justice #because this pain has been wrought against him too #What does it matter they’re innocent? So was he #He’s miserable and he wants the valar’s attention #And in many ways he was the one who finally got them to listen. Earendil only had the Silmaril because Dior was slain. Maedhros’ plan worke #He spilled blood and ruined his soul #That part that just wants to burn everything is doing it as a cry for help: ‘see what you did to us’ #It’s piteous but beautiful #Shall I go on #Maedhros #silm #the silmarillion #silmarillion #silm fandom #the silm fandom #the silm #tolkien #maitimo #maitimo nelyafinwe #russandol #war of wrath