#anyway yeah this is a day late partially bc i was working more on todays post. even the mod is late sometimes (the mod is late a lot)

[smilepebble]

"Hey Eos, have you ever heard of the Secret Eevee Village? Apparently, its only really spoken of in legends and fairy tales. Well, the truth is... its where I come from. Lets hide here for a little while."

Hero and Partner Week day 5: Frosty Forest / Treeshroud Forest / Forest of Shadows / Mystical Forest

#heropartnerweek #heropartnerweek2023 #little headcanon for my most recent rtdx team :) #nonbinary people will be like ''i know a place'' and then take you to the secret eevee village only spoken of in legend #anyway yeah this is a day late partially bc i was working more on todays post. even the mod is late sometimes (the mod is late a lot) #my art #pmd #pokemon mystery dungeon #pmd rescue team #pmd rtdx #rtdx #red/blue rescue team #pokemon #eevee #torchic #oc tag #eos #notos

[minzart]

At first I was uninterested towards BB AU because I don't like evil or angst cruel stuff but the more I read it. I'd like to see how it goes but man it do be painful.

So how does Chapter 5 work here? I doubt the VDC Group would stay in the Ramshackle Dorm because Crowley ain't fixing it, unless someone decided to pay for it to be furnished without Yuu's knowledge or as a gift for Yuu. Does Yuu not enter the audition room to watch or they watch from the otherside of the window while cleaning Pomefiore Dorm? Would the beach scene with Epel not occur? It does but Yuu takes Deuce stead causing Epel also start having a Yandere obsession as well? Does Yuu also become manager as well? Even I don't know if the part where Malleus fix the stage occurs. Unless Yuu was given an extra VDC ticket to invite others but knows no one to give it to then Lilia barges in and recommends a friend of his that never gets invited a lot (not mentioning Malleus). Yuu feels skeptical and could guess it's Malleus but decides to give them an invitation even knowing the consequences. They're done with this, they're ready for what's coming

That's so many questions and thoughts

First things first I want you to know how touched I am, bc you specifically said you didn't like cruel aus and even tho you read, probably by curiosity, and then you got invensted and for some reason that made em feel like I'm doing a good job so thank you so much??? I don't even know how to explain it??? Just ( ;°;)

And second: I am VERY SORRY for the LONG WAIT IN THIS ONE

So, remember how chapter 4 is before 5 and Kalim goes Yandere for Yuu there? Yup, Kalim offers to pay for a reform in Ramshackle, wich Yuu partially agrees, just the most serious things got fixed like the roof, Yuu would be happy with only their room being in good condition but Kalim insisted in reforming some more bc sleepover he's dieing to suggest

Early mornings were always a blessing in NRC, when the students were too groggy to care about their surroundings, when the headmaster was mostly found in his office, when teachers were only preparing their classrooms, when the sound of birds were Yuu's only companions

Today Pomefiore was the dorm assigned to Yuu's care, it's one of the friendlier dorms, for what Yuu most got from the students was a snobbish look and nothing more, but it's always a breathtaking to see it's walls and garden shine in the early morning sun

They swept and cleaned until the floor shined, finally taking a break as the first busy hour of the day started, as they rested a boy with lavender hair passed running by, he looked extremely tired and angry, but that's noone of their business is it? No. It isn't.

They lie to the hunter anyway...

Rook: pardon me but, have you seen a boy passing by in a hurry?

He approached from behind, quietly as a cat and Yuu is sure his intention was to scare them, poor guy should have tried that before Azul's overblot, Jade made sure Yuu knew how to perceive someone's presences now, by... prolongued experiencing it

Yuu: wich one? Many students seemed to wake late today y'know

The boy's eyes narrow, a glint of something more, something dangerous lured behind his smile, and Yuu knew they attracted the attention of someone they shouldn't, he already knew the truth didn't he?

Rook: is that so? A purple haired one perhaps?

He leaned in closer, watching and memorizing every inch of Yuu's presence

Yuu: yeah,but I don't know where he went tho, didn't pay attention

Yuu holds his gaze, instinct screaming to look away, hide, run, get away from the hunter

Rook: AH! That's why you look so familiar! You are the magicless janitor aren't you? The one who lives at the Ramshackle dorm?

Yuu: what about it?

Rook: you see, there's an event, VDC, that's going to happen in the school, a talent show if you will, and our dorm leader, you might have heard of him, Vil Schoenheit, is in desperate need of a place for our team to train, would you be so kind to let us stay at you dorm? Just dor a couple of weeks! Promise we are very well behaved!

Yuu: look dude, even if I could let you, the dorm is called Ramshackle for a reason, trust me it's easier to gain an injury there than to bound with your friends

Rook: but we could help you! We could do an easy fix in the basic needs and stay, please, just dor some days!

Yuu is tired, they have more tasks to do than to refuse this guy's request to sleep in a old dorm

Yuu: look... I-

The playful nature that surrounded the Hunter minutes before vanished in a blink of an eye, he leans closer and whispers

Rook: I suggest you accept my offer so you can get on Vil's good side before even meeting him trickster, I ask, not demand, a no is welcomed anytime, but for him... trust me, you do not say no to the queen... I could very well say you recovering for our precious Jewell to escape his morning practice so easily, and you don't wanna see him mad do you?

Yuu shuts their mouth, no is not an answer... then again... when do they choices even mattered in this school to beggin with? They smile bitterly looking at their feet hanging by the bench

Yuu: ... alright

Rook: wonderful! Thank you for your support Yuu! See you next week!

.... when had they given their name?

Epel couldn't belive his ears, they were hiding him

The magicless human of NRC was sticking their neck out for him and they didn't even talked

He... couldn't help but fell guilty when using that to his advantage, leaving Yuu behind alone with Rook

He would come back he just... needed a break... they would understand it right? Surely

As for Vil well... he watched it all happen form his windown, Yuu's quietly working, Rook's treat and Epel's retreat, he would be lieing if Yuu didn't intrigued him

Their resilience of the rumours and bulling is something he admired if we're being honest, being an actor came with a price and Vil could recognize a diamond in the rogue like them

He did planed to introduce himself... eventually... if his schedule permitted, there's just something about the magicles handyman that just... calls to him

And when Rook said they accepted their stay at their dorm? well... his genuine smile did put off some students during his classes

---------------------------

No, the beach scene doesn't happen, Epel just gets away and Vil's performance can't occur bc Epel is extremely late, blame RSA studnets

Yuu had to deal with Kalim, Jamil, Rook and now Vil's yandere asses while they stayed and... let's just say... things turned a little bit diferent

Yuu wasn't a manager, nor a member of the dance team,but they did always watched them train, the janitor of NRC saw how strict their routine was and how hard all member were dedicating themselves

So when Epel snapped and ran, they decided to help, as a stand in

And when Vil got away in the middle of Neige's performance? A chill ran down their spine... Kalim's behavior didn't help, him and Jamil tried to get out with Yuu before Vil's overblot ... but Yuu...

Blinding rage boiled in Vil's veins as Rook took the poisoned apple juice, he vold strangle him right now and watch as the life faded from his eyes even before the curse took effect in the hunter... if it wasn't for Neige's presence he wouldn't be conflicted on wich end first

Liquid poured from his eyes, what he could only think be tears... fainted in black and then- a slap in Rook's hand

Yuu: YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE!

The human's eyes burned intensely at the Hunter's, fury, exhaustion, fear and... hurt, all danced in their face, their attention shifting from him and Vil and then Neige, who was still standing there

Yuu pushes Rook aside and goes to Vil but... it has already started

"DON'T LOOK AT ME"

As Kalim entered the scene Yuu pushed Neige to his direction screaming for them to get out

Rook drags Yuu along as Vil overblots

____________

The smoke cleared as the consequences of the fight appeared before their eyes... the headmaster wouldn't be happy... not at all...

Yuu wasn't a manger nor a student, Vil gave them his plus one ticked for them to watch the performance

Malleus wasn't invited

Crowley had to plea so the fairy prince could help

ATENTION EVERYONE!

Asks for the AUs are still closed

This is a very old ask that I was working since my block for the AUs beggin since last 2 years I think

If you send me an ask for any of the AUs I will throw it in the trash

So yeah, if you sent me an ask before I closed them, before the big fucking READ ME in my pined post, so there's a big probability that I will answer them

But if you send the ask recently about the AUs? Sorry, it's going out of the window

#twst bb au #twst bad beggining au

[unbridgeabledistances]

a ✨drunk and clingy ian✨ one-shot

okay so we all know that saint patrick’s day is a very arbitrary and somewhat meaningless holiday (at least in the u.s. lol)- but we also know that the gallaghers are incredibly fucking irish, so i am using this as an excuse to write some drunk and clingy gallavich fluff (bc i think we all need it!! or at least i do!!!!)

hope y’all enjoy<3

--

Mickey and Ian came in the door from their final weed security run of a way-too-chilly and grey March afternoon, kicking the slush off of their lace-up boots in a tired but comfortable silence. Mickey had been fantasizing for a good part of the afternoon about his usual afternoon ritual of collapsing onto the couch with a cold beer in his hand, and taking a long lazy nap while shitty game shows played on the TV in the background— but unfortunately, Debbie had other plans. Or so he realized when he turned the corner and his eyes were met with a forest of green and white streamers blanketing the living room, with Debbie determinedly balancing on a kitchen chair to hang them in the doorway.

Mickey did a double-take, shooting a glance at Ian and then back at the festive room again. What the fuck? He quickly racked his brain— there was no way he’d could’ve forgotten Franny’s birthday, that was in the summer—and he was pretty sure that Liam’s birthday was in the winter sometime; so whose the fuck was it? Too many goddamn Gallaghers to keep track of. Finally, Mickey admitted his own defeat.

“Is it someone’s fuckin’ birthday or something?”

Mickey flashed another gaze to Ian in confusion as he said it, hoping that Ian would silently mouth whatever the occasion was to him, or at the very least raise his eyebrows and goad Mickey enough to jog his memory to remember whatever the fuck today was— but Ian just gave an easygoing grin as he took in the room’s decor and let out a laugh.

“Debbie, isn’t this kind of going overboard?”

Debbie looked over her shoulder from where she was now taping a crudely scribbled picture of a shamrock, most likely drawn by Franny, up onto the wall.

“What? If it’s our last Saint Patrick’s Day in the house, the least we can do is go out with a bang,” she answered nonchalantly, and continued fixating on hanging up Franny’s drawing.

Mickey inadvertently let out a scoff and rolled his eyes. Fucking Gallaghers.

“I’m sorry, fucking Saint Patrick’s Day?”

Ian’s lips formed a playful smile and he elbowed Mickey between the ribs. “Yeah, Mick, Saint Patrick’s Day— also known as the unironically most important day of the Gallagher family calendar year. I can’t believe I forgot it was today, with all the work stuff we had going on.”

At first Mickey couldn’t tell if Ian was actually being serious— but in the same second he decided that it didn’t really matter, since Ian’s eyes were bright and shining and there was this weird giddy grin he was sporting from ear to ear, like he was absolutely fucking delighted that it was Saint Patrick’s Day, instead of just a normal goddamn Wednesday. Fucking softie.

And as endearing as that was, Mickey still couldn’t let him off that easily. “There’s no way I’m celebrating Saint Patrick’s Day. It’s a fake holiday for yuppie rich kids to go bar hopping—I’m not getting involved in any of your Gallagher bullshit.”

Ian’s grin just grew, like he knew exactly what Mickey was doing. “Hey, you married into this family. If anything, this is your own fault.”

Mickey just rolled his eyes, then continued to unlace his boots and throw them by the doorway.

“The fuck do you do anyways, aside from getting trashed?”

Ian put a hand on Mickey’s upper back to steady himself as he pulled his own shoes off. “I think getting trashed pretty much sums up the festivities. Today’s practically a holy day of observance for Frank, and I’m assuming Debbie’s also just gonna use today as an excuse to get drunk on a Wednesday.”

“Hell yeah I am!” Debbie called from where she was putting the chair back in the kitchen.

Mickey raised his eyebrows. “I knew Gallaghers were white trash, but I had no idea you were this bad.”

“Oh, come on. You don’t have any Ukranian white trash holidays or whatever?”

Mickey held back a bitter laugh. Yeah, they had “holidays,” in the form of days when Terry was celebratorily drunk enough to leave them the fuck alone for 24 hours, rare occasions when his looming shadow was out of the house and a festive lightness bled in in its place. They sort of celebrated Christmas, which was mostly just associated with too many painful memories of Terry ripping open the presents before he or his brothers had the chance, and too many painful stings associated with him having one too many drinks as they sat quietly inside the sagging house and pretended to be a big happy family for one night a year.

But never anything as gaudy and deliberate and ridiculous as observing a C-list, Irish-American holiday just for the hell of it, just for fun—which yes, was probably fueled by Frank’s alcoholism more than anything else, but also made something swell in Mickey’s insides that he didn’t quite know how to place.

And Mickey didn’t know how to let out that entire internal monologue to Ian while Debbie was standing within earshot. “Nah, man. Milkoviches don’t really do… holidays.”

Ian snaked a hand around Mickey’s back, giving his shoulder a squeeze, a grounding touch. He gets it.

“Well, get ready to have your mind blown, Mr. Gallavich, because we’re about to celebrate this hallowed occasion Gallagher style.”

Mickey rolled his eyes again, but let himself lean into Ian’s touch, lean his weight ever-so-slightly against Ian’s chest that was pressed behind him by the doorway. And, okay— as stupid as this was, maybe there was something sort of warm and solid about tradition, about hand-scribbled shamrocks and streamers on the wall, about having days to celebrate just because you wanted to, just because you could…

Just then Franny came hurdling into the room, wearing a baggy green t-shirt and a face-painted shamrock adorning her cheek.

Ian’s face lit up when she stopped in front of them. “Hey Franny! Happy Saint Patrick’s Day!”

Franny held out two bottles of beer to Ian and Mickey from where she had been hiding them behind her back.

“Mommy said I should give these to you when you came home!”

Mickey smirked, carefully taking the bottles from Franny’s outstretched hands. “Thanks, kiddo.”

And if all celebrating Saint Patrick’s Day took was knocking down a few beers on a weekday afternoon—well, Mickey wasn’t going to complain about that.

**

Of course, hours later Mickey realized how severely he’d underestimated Debbie’s enthusiasm— after lounging around the house waiting for the stream of Gallaghers to trickle in from their various daily activities, Debbie had rounded everyone up and they migrated to the Alibi as the sun was setting, where they’d met up with Kev and V and Lip and Tami, who (thank fucking god) looked as vaguely confused and fully apathetic about this whole “Saint Patrick’s Day” situation as Mickey did.

Now it was late, and Mickey was leaning against the bartop of the Alibi sipping a thick, foamy glass of Guinness, which was as close to embracing whatever-the-fuck Irish heritage his husband had as he was possibly going to get.

All of the Gallaghers were here, swirling around the room—Debbie had put on some sort of peppy music as Kev poured everyone drinks, and a couple of other Southside neighbors had heard the bass thrumming and joined the ruckus. The room wasn’t too crowded, but it was pleasantly full of bodies and chatter— Kev had bought bunches of shiny, tacky green mardi gras beads for everyone to wear, and the air in the room was festive and bordering on sloppy in a way that felt very different from how Mickey had envisioned this evening would go.

Mickey was pacing himself, because it was a Wednesday for fuck’s sake— but his husband was an entirely different story. Between the beers at home and the various drinks Debbie had been siphoning into his hands all night, Ian was teetering on the drunkest Mickey had seen him in years—which partially made the tiniest spark of trepidation start to creep into Mickey’s bloodstream, a spark that he immediately extinguished. It was one night, the first in a long time— Ian deserved to have some fun.

And he definitely, definitely was having fun— casually dancing with Debbie and Sandy and whoever else would humor him, grinning with red-hot cheeks and bright eyes— from across the room Mickey could tell how warm his skin would be if he pressed a hand against it, how flushed. Mickey wasn’t really in the mood for dancing, or whatever the fuck stumbling around and chatting and making friends Drunk Ian was up to for the evening, and he was perfectly content to nurse his drink at the bar— which is why it surprised him when Ian pulled himself out of the crowd, slightly stumbling over his own feet, and made the way across the room to where Mickey was leaning at the bar, immediately boxing him in and putting his hands square on Mickey’s waist. Mickey almost imperceptibly let in a sharp breath.

Ian looked down at him, all smiles and shiny eyes— when he spoke the scent of sweet, hot liquor danced on Mickey’s face and all he wanted was to be closer, to breathe it in.

“Are you having fun?” Ian’s right hand traced up Mickey’s side, then back down to its hold on his hipbone.

Mickey raised his eyebrows. “You and your leprechaun family don’t mess around, Gallagher.”

Ian smiled a lazy, tipsy smile, and pecked Mickey’s cheek before Mickey could be embarrassed about it.

“D’you wanna dance with me?”

Ian’s hands slid off of his hips and entangled with Mickey’s hands that had been hanging limply at his sides, walking backwards so their fingers were laced together an arm’s distance apart.

Mickey shrugged noncommittally. “I’ll leave showing the Irish pride to you and the rest of the drunken Gallaghers.”

Ian registered Mickey’s words and opened his mouth to reply, just as Debbie pulled Ian over by the arm.

“Stop sulking with Mickey and do more shots with me!”

Jesus Christ. Ian was going to be wrecked when their alarm went off for work in the morning, and Mickey was starting to debate if he was going to need to have a talking-to with Debbie about the appropriate amount of “Saint Patrick’s Day fun” they were allowed to partake in next year— but for now Ian was happy, and he could stomach one night of hardcore festivities.

Mickey stood at the bar for a while, watching Ian and Debbie get progressively more flushed as they bobbed through the crowd— and then, when Debbie had found some other victim in their mid-twenties to get even more shitfaced with, Ian made his way across the room to Mickey again, plopping onto the barstool beside him and heaving his bodyweight onto Mickey’s left side, burying his face in the crook of Mickey’s neck. Mickey wrapped a tentative arm around Ian’s waist, trying to hold him up from slouching off of the barstool.

“M’tired.” Mickey could feel Ian’s hot breath dancing on his collarbone as he slurred out the words, and felt Ian’s eyelids flutter shut against the side of his neck.

Ian was always giving Mickey measured casual touches, wherever they were—but it was so exceedingly rare that Ian fully let himself go like this, let himself be drunk and happy and just crumple into Mickey, without worrying about holding anyone else up. It felt new, but it felt good— Mickey let the solid weight of his husband’s body leaning against his press him down, rooting him into the Alibi’s sticky floors, feeling the clammy skin of Ian’s forehead that was solidly lodged into the side of Mickey’s neck.

He hated to admit it, but in that moment, something in Mickey was also frozen solid— as much as Mickey had grown in the past few years, something about these situations, about PDA or whatever, still made Mickey feel like he was treading water—like he was fighting to stay afloat while everyone’s eyes were on him, and the strong current was only lifted when he and Ian were in the dark safety of their bedroom. If Mickey was drunk at a bar and sloppily leaning onto Ian, there was no doubt in Mickey’s mind that Ian would hold him, would gingerly touch him and caress him and do more to him than just prop him up— but something in Mickey still hesitated and flashed with warning signs in a crowded room full of people.

But Ian was still breathing hot on Mickey’s neck— so Mickey thought about what Ian would do, if it was Mickey who was tipsy and slumped on his shoulder. He tentatively raised his arm from where it was lying limply by his side, and started to run soothing circles onto Ian’s t-shirt, just above his hipbone where Mickey’s hand was holding Ian up by his waist.

Ian hummed in acknowledgement of the touch— and then he pressed a tender kiss to the crook of Mickey’s neck, where his face was buried. Fuck. Mickey just pulled him in closer, gently tugging Ian’s torso in by his belt loop to hold him steady.

Ian hummed again, then started to press kisses up and down Mickey’s neck. “You smell good.”

Mickey’s heart started to beat a little quicker, his blood running hotter than usual—and Ian couldn’t fucking do this now, while the rest of his family was milling around and dancing and wearing fucking mardi gras beads while flaunting their Gallagher pride.

Ian lifted his forehead off of Mickey’s shoulder, and gently bit at the underside of Mickey’s jaw—and Mickey thought he was going to combust right there, on the spot, in a room full of Gallaghers pressed against the bartop at the Alibi by his very drunk husband.

And in an act of excruciatingly inconvenient timing, Lip sidled up to the bar and sat on the barstool on Mickey’s other side, nursing what Mickey assumed (and hoped) was a diet Coke in a beer glass.

“Hey there, Mick. And, uh, Ian.”

Ian looked up from where he was very engrossed in continuing to nuzzle the opposite side of Mickey’s neck, and glared at Lip from across Mickey’s chest.

“Go away, Lip.” Ian collapsed his head back onto Mickey’s shoulder and closed his eyes again, wrapping his arms around Mickey’s neck like a fucking boa constrictor. Mickey snaked an arm up around Ian’s back, holding him steady on the wobbly barstool.

Lip held back a laugh as he sipped his drink, then took a drag of the cigarette he was holding. “Seems like Ian’s done enough drinking to make our ancestors proud.”

Mickey took a sip of his own beer with his free hand. “Debbie made sure of that.”

Lip raised his eyebrows. “Damn. Guess we’d better keep an eye on her, make sure she doesn’t also have the Frank gene.”

Mickey grunted in acknowledgement, then took another sip of his beer, mostly because he didn’t know what else to say. Ian’s head shifted slightly on his shoulder— and Mickey realized he probably needed to haul Ian home ASAP, before he was even more sleepy and incoherent and unable to lug down the street.

Lip noticed Ian’s movement on Mickey’s shoulder and smirked. “I’ve gotta say, I’ve never seen Ian being this clingy before. Even with other guys—no offense, Mick— he usually stayed pretty contained. And you guys aren’t usually too into the PDA department.”

Mickey shrugged, trying not to jostle the heavy weight of where Ian’s head was hanging. Lip was right—he and Ian never really were all over each other, especially not like this, outside of the context of their room, when they were very much always all over each other.

Lip kept studying them, and the corner of his mouth eventually ticked upward. “It’s good. He’s definitely not this… comfortable with anyone else. Including me, which is definitely saying something.”

It felt weird, to get something like what felt like Lip’s full blessing at a raunchy Gallagher party months after he and Ian had gotten married—but that was also exactly what it felt like was happening.

Lip’s eyes suddenly darted across the room, to where Tami was holding up his coat and gesturing to the door. Lip rose from the barstool, stubbed out his cigarette, and put out a hand to clap Mickey on the shoulder as a goodbye.

“Catch up with you later, Mick.” Lip reached out and jokingly tousled Ian’s hair. “Make sure this one doesn’t hate himself too much tomorrow morning.”

Mickey smirked. Ian was practically asleep and drooling on his shoulder, his breathing turned steady—Mickey reached a hand up to card through his hair, then gently shrugged his shoulder to get Ian’s head to rise from where it was jammed on his neck.

Ian raised his head, his eyes bleary and confused at first, then softening around the edges when he met Mickey’s gaze.

“Alright, let’s get you home, carrottop.”

#did i read this before posting it???? nope #this is so silly but was also living RENT FREE in my brain #also this is temporally separated from the last ep lol bc i do not have it in me to write anything heavy this week #drunk happy husbands only !!!! #🙅🏻‍♂️‼️ #gallavich #gallavich fic #shameless #shameless fic #ian gallagher #mickey milkovich #ian x mickey #ian and mickey #ixm #gallavich fanfiction

[neo-shitty]

toffee!

hehe glad i could make you laugh, oooh that sounds awesome! yeah id love to be tagged it sounds great :)

YES the differences are so fucking weird. like, they do know they're the same age right? i feel like its just an exagguration of how much the persons role in the group matters, like we see chan being held up as such a mature, old leader while jungkook who is literally the same age, is still babied etc. like enha hyung line is basically the same age (if a bit younger) as chenle and jisung but somehow the rules are different?? as you point out, still legal but still bizarre. hehe yeah, i mean where else are we going to rant? quora lol. mmm, hopefully more people can just write less smut abt people who are barely adults

ah, no prob it didnt take long. yeah i think thats right (i keep forgetting you know my url lol) mmhmm :( i think if that happened irl there would be some major trauma going on. knock wood it never happens to you or me lol (/hj)

hehe same! oooh glad Redemption For Cheese was realised! yess we cant rllycomplain that theyve written/produced too much good music lol. yeah, ive dragged him into being a stay so *dusts hands off* mission accomplished. mmm yeah, they tend to have a certain vibe but tbh it couldve worked if they were any other group but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ahh ur one step ahead of me on the stages of listening to ssick i think, still not convinced but thats okay! hehe, it had to be said. yesss the itch in the back of my brain is very satisfied by sorry i love you, felixs vocals deserve to be appreciated! (side note i feel like hes trying to sing more like his speaking voice, sorta husky, but tbh i wouldnt be mad if he sang like in glow, his sweet honey vocals made my life lol. but i think ive heard him say he doesnt like singing like that cos it makes his normal voice less husky, so what can you do)

> YES SOMEONE SAID IT. seungmin rap KING, he sped thru that rap like it was nothing, he deserves more rap lines. i do like how they gave minho some melodic rap lines this comeback, my guy deserved to show off those skills that made him not be eliminated (flashbacks to stay collectively wanting to murder jyp) and we already know changbin can sing, my man murdered masked singer. hyunjin can obviously sing as can jisung and felix, and i want to hear chan rap more! i feel like he started as part of 3racha (as a rap unit not producing) and then just became a vocalist (which im fine with, but it could be nice to hear him flex his rapping skills) and was partially replaced by hyunjin. anywayyy

back to album talk. lmaooo sad music to twerk to PERFECTLY describes silent cry. yes secret secret is and will always be, a masterpiece. hehe glad i could make you laugh :) i just felt like they have similar vibes. putting off skz stuff bc of not having time to cry IS the kpop stan life summarised. oh my beloved track, red lights. ahh thats okay, we can have different opinions, but by god the lyrics are *chefs kiss*. *banging on table* TWISTED AU TWISTED AU TWISTED AU. yess id love to see ur take on it! sdfghjkl it would have been glorious

no no! not stupid, just able to predict my brainwaves. ooooh thats so cool! makes me want to go there (wherever there is lol) yeah the waves are pretty good here, but none of my familys a surfer, so we dont rlly enjoy the full potential lol. YES moving on to gone away, it is indeed a heartwrenching track, but the vocals and the bloody key change? makes me want to brave being sad just to listen to it. mmm yeah, good point :( i feel like ive just gotten used to overthinking so much so that it doesnt matter what mood im in, ill do it anyway, so might as well just do what i feel like doing anyway.

yeah i think ur right! it is quite comforting knowing that all the tracks will get the love they deserve. i feel like also people assume kpop is just one genre which is utter bs. there are so many different vibes and feels and songs, i couldnt get into kpop (of which i thought only the bright cheerful present day bts stuff existed smh) until i heard gods menu so... idk where i was going with this but yeah. :)

YES FUCK YG, theyre literally on the brink of being kicked out of the big three and they are holding their salvation hostage without letting them do ANYTHING. idek what thought process goes thru their minds but arghhh its so infuriating. yess lisa's cb will be awesome but ot4 is the gold standard here.

hehe, glad u could get to this point. no no! u dont sound like a cult member at all lol yeah, i loooove some of their songs but the whole 23 members thing is getting to me. thats prob a common problem with nctzens but what can i say? im a simple girl with a limit to how many korean boys i can give my money to. atm im just trying to get into ateez and finish memorising enhypen's faces. also kard is kinda sucking me into their fandom atm, as well as eric name lol. ah what can you do? ooh thats good!

hehe i love it too! its exactly like online penpals, that was rlly well put. aww ty! hmm im okay, recovering from a bad case of rsv so thats fun. im doing okay mentally, starting therapy soon (after having to convince my mother that its not just smth i can brush off). physically i wont go into, basically i should be doing stretches to help but they dont completely fix it so my lazy ass doesnt do them, plus i got told recently im going to be stuck with this condition for the rest of my life so thats fun! ah, before you type smth dw abt me ill be fine. the weather atm is cloudy but warm, its been raining on and off today which is good for the garden. uhh i just finished reading sunburnt veils and im in the middle of prom theory which is rlly good. ummm ive got a concert tonight? that i may or may not be able to sing in (bc of the whole rsv thingo) and uhhhh idk. my dog is cute? im drinking tea rn? ive got a school dance coming up?

wbu? hows ur day going, how are you? whats the weather like on ur end? done anything interesting lately? found smth that makes you rlly happy? just any random thing youve been dying to tell someone?

no no! dont apologise, i love these exchanges. i think im happy to continue them for a long time :) on the other hand, if you get tired of them, feel free to just not answer at any time. goodness gracious this was a long ask haha hope it isnt too annoying

<3 w.a. 🐺

sorry it took me a bit to reply, i was fixing my theme ;n;

yeah, i figured it was because of the roles too. my friends and i still get taken aback when 3rd gen idols are the same age as 4th gen ones. in my head it doesn't add up sometimes. PLS THE RANT AT QUORA SKJDK tbh tho it's just going to be normalized as the years pass? esp that the boys are growing older and the amount of explicit fics will just increase. i might have to start blocking tags.

i had to look up the previous ask to remember what we were talking about xd i hope the events in champagne problems never happens to anyone. realistically, it probably happens a lot. damn i really won't wish that pain on anyone. dragging your brother into being a stay i whEEZED JFKSA additional noeasy music enthusiast o.o and ALL I CAN SAY WITH YOU GUSHING ABT FELIX IS AHA WHIPPEEEED OML can't blame you tho, i also want to hear felix sing more in other shades (if that makes sense HAHA) i really hope they'll do the role exchange in the next comeback :( or like in the near future bc i know they can do it :( the day i hear seungmin rapping it i will respectfully pass away. minho was given more lines this comeback thank fUCK i could rmb my irl being vocal abt her frustration. i don't get why minho barely has center time/lines in title tracks??? like the line distribution in the past eras just made me ???? if seventeen can balance lines with 13 members why cant a group of 8 do the same? moving on. i haven't watched the stray kids show simply bc i don't want to cry HAJS but i've seen clips. imagine if skz debuted without minho and felix?!?!? i rmb another irl catching bias feels towards changbin bc of the masked singer only to find out that the man's a rapper. i love how skz's vocals were highlighted this comeback :c there were a lot of mellow tracks! i find it cute when chan sings/raps bc it gets kinda obvious that he's a foreigner? the accent (im not even sure if it's the accent) it just shows. "putting off skz stuff bc of not having time to cry IS the kpop stan life summarised." CORRECT.

abt the twisted au o.O i'll inquire my irl if she wants to write it or not. if she doesn't want to, i'll do it. i miss writing twisted aus <3___<3 and i also miss going to the beach with my friends :' ) but it's starting to get cold here and i don't think i'll be able to enjoy the beach as much as i would if i went beaching in the summer. so maybe next summer? gone away really has an sm-ballad vibe. the thing about skz being a self-producing group, their songs don't sound like typical jype songs? and i just appreciate that bc in all honesty im not a fan of jyp groups at all. PLS the overthinking. i wish i could mute overthinking.

anyone who assumes kpop is just one genre obv hasn't listened to a single track. if kpop was just one genre why do i like some tracks more than the others??? oh you've only recently become a kpop stan? tbh im not a fan of the bright songs of bts either. i liked their older ones *chefs kiss* really matched high school vibes. yg has good artists and they're just wasting the talent ~.~ that strategy they have will get tiring eventually. people will stop waiting on blackpink and move on to newer more active groups ://

HAHAHAH yeah the 23 members is pretty overwhelming! it was the reason i didn't bother stanning before quarantine started. i don't regret stanning tho, met my ult bias in that group <3___<3 i don't really purchase albums unless i like the tracks xd ohhh getting into ateez just in time for the comeback! let me know what you think about them! i was fond of them at some point but grew out of it. good luck with memorizing enhypen! it took me a while to distinguish to people there XD i haven't checked out kard yet but chan plays their songs during lives and they're sexc hype music me likey *u*

i had to look up rsv im sorry. i'm glad you're recovering! please rest more and don't stress yourself out. bro i wish i could go to therapy too bc i have weird issues i can't justify and i need a professional to tell me what's the reason behind it. stuck with what condition btw? what happened? i'm sorry in case i just forgot. yesterday was a bit rainy for me too :(( it's not the type of rainy that makes me anxious so B) oh concert! good luck and i hope you'll be able to sing but i also don't think it's best for you rn :c what's your dog's breed? and yes i just finished drinking tea too. AAAAA i miss school dances :(( the last one i was supposed to have was cancelled bc of covid.

i was less productive today and i'm teetering between being mentally stable and becoming a hermit again. i'm anxious with a lot of things atm so like : D not the best state. today it was a bit sunny but not hot hot which was nice. i changed my theme today bc i couldn't wait for sept. 1st. and no i haven't found anything that makes me happy HAHAHA shit like that's hard to identify. don't have anything to say too, i'm just thinking about why i'm procrastinating too much atm T_T and i'm listening to this rap song atm and one of the rappers sounded like han.

it isn't annoying! i enjoy the long exchanges but i do admit it takes me awhile to type down a reply. so if i get more busy, it'll prolly take a bit longer for me to reply.

#toff.asks #wild anon 🐺

[clumsyclifford]

i typed out a Whole thing and then changed my mind but how about like lazy sunday in before the work week w t-shirt verse jalex? ily bye x

omg hello this got (1) away from me and (2) so ridiculously romantic i have no excuse. there’s just something about t-shirt jalex. also i am currently taking suggestions for what color alex’s hair should be in this ‘verse bc as of now it is unspecified. okay hope you like it x

read here on ao3

Alex is at the stove. Jack’s barely awake and this is the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen.

“Morning,” he croaks, slumping forward to affix himself to Alex’s back. Alex staggers, laughing quietly.

“Good morning, my love,” he says. The kitchen always feels somehow both bigger and cozier with Alex in it, spacious but flooded with love. Love, Jack finds, smells like pancakes and tastes like Alex’s toothpaste and feels like sunlight and the cotton of Alex’s shirt under his fingers. It fits nicely into Jack’s kitchen. Their kitchen. 

Their kitchen. Jack is still having a hard time getting used to that.

“You didn’t have to get up,” he mumbles against Alex’s shoulders. “Coulda slept in.”

Alex shrugs. “Was up anyway. Thought it’d be nice to make breakfast.”

“But it’s nice to cuddle,” Jack points out, eyes still closed. He presses his nose into Alex’s neck, inhaling deeply. “Mm, you’re warm.”

Alex’s deep, gentle laugh fills the air. “You’re clingy.”

“It’s cold,” Jack slurs. Slowly but surely, the atmosphere is seeping into his senses, pleasantly waking him up. “I love you for making pancakes.”

“I know you do.”

“Gonna make tea.”

“I prepared your mug and boiled the water already. You just need to pour it.”

“Have I mentioned lately that you’re the love of my life?” Jack presses his lips to the tattoo behind Alex’s ear, lingering a moment.

“Doesn’t hurt to hear,” Alex says happily. Jack reluctantly detaches himself from his boyfriend’s body to go and make himself some tea. 

Tea is a weekend drink. Jack drinks coffee to get through the mind-numbing work days, but tea is for Sundays like this one. It’s nine in the morning and Jack can already feel the laziness of the day settling over their shoulders; they’re going nowhere today, doing nothing. It’s not often a perfect Sunday comes along, but Jack clings to the opportunity whenever it does. Like today.

Dust hovers in the beams of light stretching through the room and the apartment feels alight with a glittering January. Unlikely warmth starts in Jack’s chest and spreads outwards, something he can’t even attribute to the tea since he hasn’t begun to drink it yet.

Glancing over at Alex, humming to himself as he flips the pancakes, the warmth intensifies. Oh, Jack thinks, not particularly surprised.

It stands to reason that the love filling the kitchen would saturate his body as well.

-

Light spills over Alex, highlighting strands of hair and shining on his skin, brown eyes glowing almost as golden as the sunlight. It makes Jack wonder why he’s not a poet or something, except there aren’t words for this image, and Jack would be hard-pressed to come up with an original way to phrase what thousands of artists have already expressed.

He takes a picture. They’re worth a thousand words, if what they say is true, and that’s close enough.

Alex looks up at the movement. Jack just smiles and shamelessly takes another, catching the fond look on Alex’s face before setting his phone face-down on the table again.

“Stop it, you creep,” he says. “Help me with this.”

“Alex, I’m so fucking bad at crosswords,” Jack says, shifting his chair around the table anyway. “You know this.”

“But you know things that I don’t! Together we can solve it.”

“You could also solve it on your own.”

Alex shakes his head. “You’re overestimating my skills. I don’t think I’ve completed a Sunday puzzle in, uh, my entire life.”

“Well, I hate to break it to you,” Jack says wryly, “but I am not your secret weapon.”

Alex reaches for Jack’s hand and brings it to his lips, brushing a kiss over Jack’s knuckles. “Yes you are.”

Jack sighs. He’s a sucker for Alex and he doesn’t see that trend slowing anytime soon. “Fine. Give me one.”

“Here, I bet you know this one.” A tap of the pen against the newspaper next to the clue for 6-Down. “‘For You’ co-singer Rita.”

“Ora,” Jack says immediately. “Everyone knows that song.”

“Ora,” Alex repeats to himself, like something he should have known to know. “Actually, I didn’t. See? Already fulfilling your secret weapon duties.”

The puzzle is sparsely and randomly filled out. “Why don’t you go in order?”

“Because I don’t know 1-Across,” Alex says. “And if I stopped there it’d be a very short puzzle.”

Jack hums, skimming the list of clues for any other answers he might have. Most of the clues he thinks he could get are ones Alex has already filled in. Some are ones Jack would never have known. “What the fuck is a superlative prefix? ‘Most’?”

“Yeah, like…high school superlatives,” Alex says. “Most likely to make it big. Most likely to, uh, go to jail after graduation.”

“What the fuck were your high school superlatives?” Jack says, amused. “I didn’t know that’s what they were called.”

“Yeah, I’m pretty sure this is wrong, though,” Alex says, face drawn in thought. He’s doing the hair-twirling thing again so Jack interrupts the motion, linking their fingers together and scratching gently at the nape of Alex’s neck. Alex hardly seems to notice. “Because I’m pretty sure 4-Down is ‘prince’.”

“‘Hamlet, for one,’” Jack reads from the clues list. He shakes his head. “I’m starting to think you’re smarter than me, Al.”

“Starting to?”

Jack scoffs and stabs at the remaining pancake on Alex’s plate, mostly because he knows Alex isn’t going to finish it. “Hey.”

“I’m teasing, completely joking,” Alex says, leaning into Jack and briefly resting his cheek against Jack’s shoulder. “I’m definitely not smarter than you. I teach middle school. If anything, that automatically makes me more of a dumbass.”

“You love doing that, though.”

Alex sighs. “Yeah. You can love something and still be an idiot for doing it, though.”

“Like being in a relationship with you.” Jack giggles. “Joking. Just kidding. I’m just kidding.”

“You better be,” Alex says lightly. “I know a lot of your deepest darkest secrets, Jack Barakat, and I am not afraid to unleash a pack of twelve-year-olds on you.”

Jack would like to argue that a horde of twelve-year-olds doesn’t scare him, but it does. It very much does.

“Fine,” he says. “You win this round.”

Alex kisses his cheek. As he moves away, Jack turns his head and kisses him on the lips. “You taste like pancakes.”

“You taste like you,” Alex replies, and it doesn’t sound sweet, but it really, really is. Jack licks his lips. He’s not sure what exactly he tastes like, but it charms him to think that it’s always more or less the same, or at least that Alex finds something familiar in every kiss he steals off Jack’s lips. 

“Okay,” he says, leaning over the newspaper spread out before them. “We can do this. Who was in The Irishman?”

-

Whoever said that thing about how it’s better to have tried and failed than to never have tried at all might have been onto something.

They concede to the crossword puzzle after almost an hour of staring at it. To Jack it seems pathetic, until Alex grins at him and promises that this is rather impressive considering when he tries to do it alone he only ever gets, like, ten answers, and they’re often wrong. 

Half-finished really isn’t so bad.

The rest of the afternoon and evening stretches out before them, in all its unscheduled glory, and Jack, like the mature adult he is, pulls Alex to the couch and insists they spend at least three hours of the day watching TV.

His second mug of tea is sitting, partially drunk, on the coffee table, Alex’s empty mug beside it. Jack’s is going cold but he’s warm with Alex’s head in his lap, eyes closed as Jack pushes a hand through his hair, and he can’t find it in himself to care. As a compromise, they’ve put on Project Runway, something Alex loves Jack enough to sit through but doesn’t care enough about to pay attention to. If Jack were a more petty person, he would be annoyed by this, but he’s not. Having Alex like this is arguably better, essential in the task of keeping Jack’s thighs warm and also giving Jack something to look at when the urge strikes him.

The angles of Alex’s face and the way his hair flops over his forehead are enough to keep Jack mesmerized for hours.

It’s in one of these moments of weakness, Jack gazing down at the boy in his lap instead of watching the high-stakes but decidedly less enchanting events unfold on the TV, that Alex opens his eyes. His gaze catches Jack unawares, but Jack doesn’t flinch.

“You’re not even watching,” Alex huffs, smirking. “It was your idea to watch something and you aren’t even watching it.”

“I’ve got a better view right here,” Jack says.

Alex just rolls his eyes. “C’mere,” he says, grabbing clumsily at the front of Jack’s shirt.

“I don’t think I am physically capable of kissing you from this angle.”

“Oh, is that a challenge?” Alex picks his head up and pulls Jack down, and it’s not ideal or particularly attractive, but Jack has to admit that they do, technically, kiss, thus proving Jack wrong, which is probably in Alex’s top ten favorite things to do. Only for a second, though, before Jack pulls away.

“I stand corrected, but I also kind of hated that,” he says.

Alex laughs, musical and bright. “Sorry. Let me try again.” He shifts around, straightening up until his feet are on the floor and his body is upright, and this time Jack has no complaints when Alex curls his fingers around the collar of Jack’s t-shirt and drags him in. 

Project Runway isn’t exactly the ideal soundtrack to making out on the couch, but Jack’s not picky.

A fluttering touch lands on Jack’s hip, sneaking just under the hem of his shirt to rest against his skin. Alex releases Jack’s shirt, sliding his other hand up and around to cradle Jack’s face, thumb brushing his jaw. The show in the background fades to nothing, as so often the world does when Alex’s lips are on his. Everything is Alex and Alex is everything — and maybe that’s always true, but it’s easier to sink into when they’re attached in so many places, lips under teeth and noses brushing cheeks and hands forever tracing skin, clothes, hair, whatever ends up beneath Jack’s fingertips. 

It’s looking more and more like the love in the kitchen hadn’t been confined to the kitchen. Or maybe it had never been about the kitchen, but the company. And maybe Jack has known this all along, and the love he feels for Alex follows him around like a stray dog, like a best friend, like a promise. It bleeds from him, infusing itself into the air without ever lessening in himself. Sometimes it trips off his tongue.

Often it does.

“I love you,” Jack murmurs, like he’s just a ragdoll stuffed with love who’s coming apart at the seams, another stitch undone whenever Alex touches him. He’ll keep spilling this love over them and somehow he’ll never run out, and if that makes him weak then Jack is content to be weak. 

Alex only laughs a little, but it’s not mean-spirited, just sweet. “Would it surprise you to know that I love you, too?”

It wouldn’t. This is the secret to Jack’s never-ending supply: the love he gives is the love he receives.

“I love you for making me breakfast,” Jack whispers, pressing his lips to Alex’s cheek, just outside the corner of his eye. “And for the tea. And for making me do the crossword puzzle with you. And for watching shitty reality TV with me.” With each proclamation he brushes a kiss to Alex’s forehead, his other cheek, the corner of his mouth. Alex’s smile stretches across his face, crinkling his eyes by the time Jack kisses him again, for real, though he still returns it to the best of his ability.

It doesn’t last long. “You don’t play fair, JB,” Alex breathes, then laughs again like he can’t help it. “What am I supposed to say to that?”

“You could start with ‘I love you too,’” Jack suggests, slanting a breezy smile at Alex. “That usually works.”

Alex gathers Jack’s wrists in his hands and kisses his palms, one after the other, before lifting his gaze back to Jack. In the light of the apartment, Jack has never seen anyone more beautiful. The truth of his own earlier words washes over him like a sedative, a comforting tranquilizer. 

“Doesn’t feel like enough,” Alex admits, “but I’m not sure this love can be put into words, you know?”

Jack does know.

“Though it’s worth saying,” Alex continues, sliding his hands into Jack’s until their fingers are interlaced, “that I love you for doing the impossible crossword with me, and I love your half-drunk cups of tea, and I loved you in the morning and I love you right now and when we go to sleep tonight, I’ll love you then, and every night after that for the rest of my life, you know what? I’ll love you for those too.”

Jack understands that these are big, big words, promises that are much easier to make than keep. But with Alex holding his gaze and his hands right now, sheltered from the real world or maybe creating it, he knows that Alex means every word, and Jack does too.

#jack barakat #alex gaskarth #jalex #jalex fic #all time low #atl fic #fic #my fic #holy FUCK this is fluffy and romantic and ??????? #one of the lines in this makes me lose it #i know i wrote it but it makes me LOSE it #ok i am gonna draft this until it's a good time to post it #aka probably in a day or two #bc the malum thing just posted tonight #by the way it is fully 7am #i wrote this in the last two hours #the sun has risen and the sky is a beautiful pastel rn #in case anyone was wondering #boy. my sleep schedule. it sure is. uh. a thing that does not exist #(insert calum yikes emoji) #man.........the words in this fic. the sentences #every single thing i write is like literally one word away from making absolutely no fuckin sense #arguably it already does not #i had to stop listening to my love songs playlist and put on this playlist of instrumental romantic music #cos i was trying to be poetic and shit but there were all these fuckin LYRICS going on and it was Not Happening #ANYWAY into the drafts this goes see yall in a little bit #tirednotflirting #ask #answered #ok im posting this now at half 1pm but . dont get me wrong. i wrote and drafted it at 7am

[paradife-loft]

1&2 for general, ships, characters & story

General

1. If you had to join a sect, which would you join?

Ahahaha oh, oh no, the difficult question!!! *covers face*

Tbh I would. join the Lan sect and then be like, the most problematic Lan ever to Lan XD (”But James, don’t you have a reflexive fight me!!! response to rules and authority....?” yes maybe so shush now that’s why I said problematic.)

Like the thing is. I DO like being a nerd, and I DO like the idea of cultivating with music certainly moreso than with swords look I do not enjoy physical exertion a lot of the time, and I semi-regularly become full of emotion and start wailing to whoever’s nearby about wanting to live in somewhere as beautiful as the Cloud Recesses??? It is SO lovely there. Also the only other option I was considering, the Jiang, tbh gives me the impression that I would die miserably of humidity in Yunmeng sooooo :/

But also for real I am... a lot more chill with following rules when I agree with them about their purpose being to better you ethically and also to form a cohesive community, and I’ve chosen to adhere to them by my own will? Uhh, demonstrably lmao. But yeah I’d definitely still be Arguing about things and eating hot peppers in Caiyi town and playing the “it’s not really drinking if you neutralise the alcohol” game ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

2. Your three favorite characters?

*lies dramatically on the ground* How am I supposed to pick just threeeeee???

But ok, so, Jin Guangyao, and then *spins the roulette wheel for today’s picks* probably Lan Xichen and Wei Wuxian, averaged out?? But I have a lot of feelings about Everyone ;u;

Ships

1. What’s your OTP?

*chinhands* Surely we all know this by now :P

2. What’s your NOTP? Or any other ship you hate?

Uhhhhh hhhhhhh hahaha ngl I usually feel guilty talking about notps in public??? Probably bc often as not it’s more about “90% of the content I see in the fandom is relatively fluffy and/or mundane and/or lacking in meaty conflict and therefore bores me to tears” oops.

But I will say tbh that I have a pretty visceral unhappy NOPE reaction to LXC/NHS in. Probably 95% of contexts ever. Unless I feel particularly into reading, like, sex-as-self-harm fic on any given day, lmao.

Characters

1. If you could date any character from MDZS, who would you pick?

Lol, none of them.

2. If you had to kill a character, who would you kill?

Save a sex worker or POW, toss JGS off a cliff :) (predictable answer but hey) (I mean, this is distinct from an answer to “who would I kill at a point in the story prior to their actual death,” but. I would be remiss at existing if I didn’t take the opportunity to say I would kill JGS given the slightest excuse.)

Story

1. If you could make one major story change, what change would you make? Why?

Ahhhh, hell. Actually, you know what? I would slightly revamp Qin Su’s character to have her be aware of her parentage since roughly the same time as JGY is, and have them both separately keeping that a secret from one another for roughly the same reasons. She’s disturbed by the letter from Bicao simply because of the implications around someone wanting to make this knowledge public. (On the other hand: she DOES still ask JGY about how Rusong died, and IS still angry and horrified by the attitude he takes to that question and the implication that he was the one who orchestrated that death, because wtf just because his parents were siblings doesn’t mean he should have been anything other than a happy, perfectly loved, alive child??? Get a fucking grip!)

...And then I think. if she does still end up dying* then it’s probably gonna be directly NHS’s fault, in this context? Because “oh okay I was not expecting her to be chill with that, that’s an unpleasant surprise; well I still gotta ruin JGY’s marriage somehow SHRUG”. But on the other hand I really really don’t love all the women dying, so maybe instead he just reveals her complicity publicly and destroys her reputation and turns her into a pariah? :/ Which is still unpleasant but at least isn’t. death.

Anyway the reason why is like. Partially just aesthetic preferences!! I like “morally questionable power couple” much better than I like “evil dude and morally pure innocent victim wife”. (I in fact very much dislike the latter. Looking @ u, late Numenor.) And also partially - I very much like the additional resonance of “JGY underestimates he sweet and kind people around him and doesn’t notice that they can also have sneaky ruthless streaks” that this would add re: Huaisang? While also for that matter foreshadowing the Huaisang reveal?

And, yeah, a lot of other changes I would “like” to make, honestly fall more into the genre of “things I would like as fix-it fics” rather than changes I want to make to the base story, because so many of the pieces I’ve gone “augh but what if that were different!” are just. structurally important to MDZS’s tragic and other thematic elements. Messing with this aspect to Qin Su’s story doesn’t have to make the base plot non-tragic, but does improve on a few issues I have with e.g. morally polarised female characters who all die anyway.

2. Which character would you bring back to life?

!!???!!? when are we talking, here! in what fashion?

....okay, so for the sake of not making my head explode with potential options, I’m going to limit this to cases of characters who are 100% confirmed dead, being brought back either as a fierce corpse or via sacrifice-summon, generally within the main timeline of the story (i.e. not several decades post-canon).

And of that set under those conditions, I’m gonna pick Jiang Yanli. Look. I LOVE the possibilities of fierce corpse!Jiang Yanli. As a scenario it’s both incredibly fucked up but also the possibilities for really emotional reconciliation between all three Yunmeng siblings in the present timeline??? Logistically I think this would have to take place in a bookverse-style “LWJ carries WWX off to the burial mounds post-Nightless City battle” situation... so like, in a fit of practically qi-deviating rage-grief, WWX reanimates JYL’s corpse right as she dies, a la Wen Ning? and then part of what he’s doing, half out of his mind, during the missing time in the Burial Mounds is working on bringing her spiritual consciousness to put back in there.

........there’s definitely more logistics to be worked out, most notably “where is she during the intervening decade?” but. I love the idea of Jiang Cheng’s anger being not only “you killed my sister” but also “YOU TURNED MY SISTER INTO A FUCKING ZOMBIE”. I love the idea of, eventually, her being ACTUALLY PRESENT to express some of her own opinions and feelings on how WWX & JC fighting over her death (& fierce corpse status) is rly fucked up. make them deal with her as an actual person who’s inconvenient in her wants and needs and willingness to always extend a hand to others, not just a place to hang all their messy emotions on! give her eventually a chance to bond with Jin Ling, and the awkwardness and grief about how much of his life she missed, interspersed with “!!!!! I get to have this back! feelings!”

Because also just in general, I’d really love to have her around to interact with all the characters in their fucked-up “one timeskip later” iterations, and her perma-dying really just robs us of that chance and it’s very rude!

Bonus: holy fuck what would it be like for all her talents and skills and weaknesses to suddenly be completely reversed? Extremely physically strong and capable now! But more likely to scare people than charm them. Can she still, like, taste food properly? Who knows. But wouldn’t THAT be a juicy situation to explore for her! :O

#stripedroseandsketchpads #about me #ask meme responses #no good things for the poor sad cultivators #ask a James

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

Sorry I haven't been active beyond shitposts lately, I've been busy getting my thesis up and running and barely have time or brainpower to spare to write at night before I pass out

On the bright side I read 6 pages of an academic paper this week and understood EVERYTHING. Yes I had to Google every other word (not literally, but it sure felt like it at times) but I actually understood it all in the end and I am so proud of myself.

6 pages, u might say, 6 pages is all u did in 3 days?? Well... Yeah XD It's a math and theory based paper, have mercy pls. I gotta work everything out on paper and then take notes that are informative enough for future reference and I get tired after every 2 pages to the point I'm falling asleep at my desk... I have a poor work ethic.

I also think I'm close to tying in what I wanna do to Systems Theory like my prof. Wants. He's very into reconstructability analysis and multidimensional relations with his probabilistic databases and well. I found that probabilistic deductive databases are a thing and You Know Me...

There's this thing called a trilattice right. And it consists of 3 partial orderings on the same set each going a different direction with each direction also being a lattice, it's actually *really* cool. Anyway, my profs catchphrase is BASICALLY "information is constraint" and GUESS WHAT BABEY. One of those partial orderings on the trilattice for the rules in the PDDB (probabilistic deductive database) is named Knowledge in a interval of [0,1] because it tells you the amount of information that specific fact gives you!

So I'm gonna ask him for help tomorrow morning to see if that can't be tied back in to a sort of reconstruction but for probabilistic deductive databases and their rules. Because with regular probabilistic databases it's easy to have 3 variables (ABC) then split into 2 (AB) and 2 (BC), and then reconstruct it from there right? But. I don't know how that would be possible with Rules based on facts and logic not just probabilities, and I wanna know if it's even possible because there IS still math involved with the rules, I just don't know if I'd be able to reconstruct anything with it cuz I don't even know the first step to that problem cuz it seems so different from the Regular PDB reconstruction problem and I GUESS that's what the whole thesis research thing is for, but STILL. I am just. So Tired. Let me sleep.

I put off so much work today just to do more research on my thesis like a CHUMP. I should've finished my parallel programming hw, but I didn't. Haha. I put it off too long already it's due Friday XD

Oh also I start work tomorrow so I will have even less time. But I am starting work!!! I'm actually kinda excited. I'm gonna be TAing 2 classes which sounds cool! except a lot of the students are my friends (4/5 in one class and 2/2 in the other!!). So it will be kinda awkward since I am the extra help session. At some point my prof (same one who is my thesis advisor) wants me to actually teach an entire lesson myself. I am so nervous I have super bad stage fright lol. Actually tho, these two classes tie right into my thesis subject so hopefully by then I will be well read on all the subjects necessary to teach. I can, at the very least, teach them reconstruction. Maybe not much else, but I got that going for me haha

Oh God what happened I was gonna go to bed with an apology like, "yes Ive just shitpost for the past like week sorry about that" but here I am 1am, meeting at 11am (I can't be fully rested on sub-11/12 hours of sleep fml), just rambling about my life I am so sorry

You guys wanna see a candle I made today as a gift for actually reading this (and as part of the apology)

It's so beautiful

I was gonna put one of my borderlands stickers on but I was worried it'd peel when I lit it, so I chose a sticker I had 2 copies of

My mom thinks it's hilarious and that's all I needed I also got her to say "big yikes" today because we spilled wax on the oven mitts my power grows

#Sleeping like. 13+ hours a day + naps is totally normal right #Totally. #You wanna hear someone frantically yell about probabilistic databases? No? Toobadyourereadingitanyway #Jkjk #Cruddy rambles

[a-queer-seminarian]

free will, predestination

So i’m reading through my Presbyterian Heritage and Polity notes in preparation for my ordination exams next week and figured I’d throw all the theology that confuses me most into one text post.

Providence and Free Will

According to Calvin, God is a micro-manager:

There is no moment in your life when God is not with you, actively loving you in that moment

At its best, providence means that God is active in all parts of the world

And then this is where it gets bizarre and confusing and i just gotta be like Calvin. honey. no.

Because Calvin’s idea of free will is the compatibilist idea – free will is compatible with divine determinism

Shannon’s example: Today I put on a green shirt; God determined that I would put that green shirt on. I had the agency, I had to go through the process of choosing the shirt and putting it on, but it would not have happened if God had not determined it.

So like, I did use free will to pick my shirt – but God also made it happen. Somehow…both…are true

Everything has two layers: human agency & intention, and divine agency & intention.

Meanwhile, other theologians have another take on free will – the incompatibilist idea (Gustavo Guierrez is on this team and so am i)

God limits Hir power, gives us room to do things that are against the will of God

SO YEAH, Calvin alludes to Amos being like, “There is no evil in the city but God has done it” – like, if something bad happened it’s because God determined it will.

I just. Nope. Sorry guess it’s just the Catholic in me jumpin out but No Evil Thing Comes From God thank you very much

Shannon spent so much time and energy trying to make this make sense for us and trying to explain how the heck Calvin could believe this stuff, I love you Shannon you work so hard. has the seminary given you a raise lately? they should

Calvin’s context is key to understanding why he thinks what he does about free will

he was writing in a time of communal danger -- his community had been kicked out of the Church and exiled from their country, and feared violence from several sides

what he was saying is that no matter how messed up everything seems, we are actually safe as kittens in the hands of God 

There is no part of what is happening that is beyond God’s control and loving care

see like. I agree with that wholeheartedly. God deeply cares about what’s going on – but I can only imagine Xe has limited Hir control over what’s going on or bad shit wouldn’t happen

But yeah Shannon was like “when it’s communal endangerment like what Calvin’s little community of excommunicated refugees were going through, this theology is comforting. When it’s individual pain like a rape or abuse, it’s less comforting. When it’s suffering viewed on a global scale, that’s also less comforting”

Shannon admits she doesn’t believe that even Calvin himself would believe this stuff today – his view of suffering was so local; we now see suffering across the centuries and across the world and how race and gender and all play into that

“I don’t think it really works to say let’s take this theology and apply it to individual cases where it would be harmful, or this massive case of race across the last six hundred years”

Which is basically her way of saying we shouldn’t go with his view of free will these days i’m pretty sure. Whew. Thank you, Shannon

Okay, you know, I do kinda get it…like. If you are in a community like Calvin’s (or like ancient Judah when people wouldn’t stop conquering them and their sister nation just got frickin. wiped out.) and you are Completely Powerless, your survival depending on the Whims of rulers who don’t give a damn about you….it makes sense that thinking that everything, even the Bad, is being pre-ordained by God.

Like, “my life is not just determined by the shitty choices made by people in the past or present, but also by a God who intends good for me.”

…But then Calvin loses me again because when it comes to wondering why God decided to make the world like this – why God not only allows but apparently determines suffering –

Calvin is like, “uh that curiosity is a sin.” Calvin says you’re not supposed to ask those questions – that asking questions is good but there’s a limit

Uh, dude, ya ever read Habakkuk?? we’re allowed to ask God why

Anyway, as if that weren’t all baffling enough it’s time for the really hard part --

Predestination!!

So. One of the core beliefs of Reformed theology is that no part of us is not tainted by sin -- if we were pools of water and sin were ink, we’d see that the ink has permeated the whole pool, not just parts of it.

Therefore, as Shannon says, “it would be really bad news if our salvation were based on getting it right” -- our wills are so bound up by sin, we would not be able to save ourselves.

“Help, we’ve fallen and we can’t get up”

Luckily, no part of our salvation is up to us -- it’s all up to God

“it would be logical, Calvin says (i personally disagree bc dude wtf), for God to just throw us all away – but God decides to save all of us. What this means is that our eternal state, whether we are in heaven or hell, has no causal relation with our works on the planet. How we behave does not determine whether we go to heaven or hell. It’s God decision, made before we are born, not based on how we’re gonna be – God just decides.”

That being said...

“If God decides we are among the elect, we get some goodies – and that can help us screw up a little less in the world. But God’s grace comes first; we still cannot save ourselves on our own”

The “goodies” Shannon’s talking about are like, virtues or something; a desire to do good -- so like, we can have a pretty good idea of who is “elect” based on their actions (i’m not a fan of this and Shannon admits it’s been used to judge and stuff)

“So God saves us, and we respond to that with gratitude.”

Why this idea was a big deal back in the day, whether you agree or not:

Calvin’s idea of predestination was the ultimate stripping of power from the Roman Catholic Church – God decides, not the pope or bishops or priests; it’s not based on how good I am or how much money I have for indulgences

Some context:

Calvin is teaching all this to people who are studying to be pastors. They’re going to be going back to places where they can be killed for these beliefs – they are scared they will be murdered, and most of all they are scared they will recant under torture.

Calvin tells them: God has already saved you. You would not be in this room if God had not. If you recant, it does not undo that fact. – incredibly comforting for them

So don’t be scared – instead, you can respond to God’s grace

The idea of being “elect” should not cause one to be proud but act with humility

It is radically against Calvin’s predestination to imagine you are superior for your elect status; you have nothing to do with it

You should never be proud and judging other people for not being “good Christians.” You were not saved because you were a good Christian. You are learning how to be a good Christian because God saved you while you were a screw-up.

There is no illusion of meritocracy in Calvin’s grace theology – grace is free. No one earns it.

Okay. So. there are actually two “kinds” of predestination you can believe in:

Double Predestination:

God picked some people for heaven and picked some for hell

“I think that the number of PCUSA Presbyterians who believe in double predestination can be counted on two hands”

Single Predestination:

everyone is originally headed to hell, but God picks some for heaven (God didn’t elect anyone to hell as in double predestination; i.e. God does not actively damn anyone, God just doesn’t actively save them)

And another option based on that:

You can argue that grace is free for absolutely everybody -- everyone has been elected, predestined for heaven

Barth is one who says that every human being is predestined to heaven

What about atheists and/or non-Christians?

faith is a requirement but also a gift

broaden the idea of what the response to being elected is

did Calvin assume everyone elect was in the church? yes. But his theology does not actually require it.

maybe a faithful response can mean more than blatant assent to Christ

___

The monster under the bed of all this predestination stuff is the Protestant Work Ethic that developed from it after Calvin’s death

everyone trying to demonstrate that they are among the elect by being better

that’s the exact opposite of Calvin’s point!

this attempt to prove we’re elect evinces our sinful nature:

oh, we don’t work to earn our salvation? okay, we’ll work to prove it instead

and a pit of guilt:

some of us feel like we have to work nonstop for the betterment of the world as we live out our salvation

the theological definition of pride is the attempt to justify your own life

“I know that my life is worthwhile because I have these friends, I’ve accomplished these things, I help these people” 

Calvinist theology says No, your life has already been justified and you didn’t have anything to do with it. And now you live that out in gratitude and grace of others.

To sum all this up,

There’s a lot of Calvin’s thoughts here that I don’t think I agree with. I absolutely do not believe that evil things are determined or willed in any way by God -- but I do understand a little better the context that led Calvin to believing that.

I also only like a Predestination that argues that all humanity has been elected -- because “God shows no partiality” -- how or why would God only have chosen some of us sinners and not others? Is God arbitrary?

Still, I like how this theology of Predestination was part of Calvin’s attempts to do away with meritocracy. That’s something so many of us, especially people like me who are white and act like we are successful because of our own merit (we “pulled ourselves up by our own bootstraps” without regard for all the unearned privileges that support our economic well-being) could stand to learn. We don’t earn salvation -- it’s a gift. If we truly grasped that, we would be liberated from our sense of guilt and shame and from our pride.

But even though I get it a little better, I really hope that predestination does not show up on the exams next week.

#predestination #john calvin #free will #reformed theology #polity #notes #polity class #ordination exams

[snarkystjames]

Listen To Your Heart || St. Berry

Date: December 13th. Late afternoon

Location: McKinley High School & Rachel’s house

Starring: Rachel Berry @starberrycupcake & Jesse St. James

Notes:  Jesse shows up at McKinley after hearing Rachel is banned from seeing her boyfriend. He offers to help her study.

Warnings: partial song fic bc it’s glee (gross)

Rachel Berry: 

Rachel had begun the year determined and not distracted by anything and now here she was, almost the end of the first semester of her senior year completely consumed with something other than the future. It had felt so good to be so focused on Hunter and absolutely nothing else but now that she was grounded until her grades were up, she was frustrated with herself. She didn’t regret being with Hunter in the least bit. She’d had the best, most wild three months of her entire life and she wasn’t about to regret any of it because of school. She would just have to pull herself together and quickly get her grades up and she and Hunter would be off to starting their future in no time. 

Her teachers were seemingly exasperated with her constant requests for extra credit and make-up work so she could hopefully pull her grade up before her GPA dropped significantly. Though reluctant, they still gave her a much needed chance and she knew that if she could just get it all done she would be set and she could see Hunter on her birthday without having to sneak around. It had only been a couple of days but knowing she couldn’t see Hunter made her want to see him even more.

Rachel was just finishing up glee club when she sent a text to her boyfriend, letting him know she was finally out of class and was thinking of him when she bumped into a familiar face right outside the door, almost knocking her phone out of her hand. “Oh! Jesse!” She glanced around to make sure her glee peers were nowhere to be found. “If any of the New Directions see you, they’re going to flip out on me.” She let her eyes trail up to his face, her demeanor softening a bit. “What’re you doing here, anyway?”

Jesse St. James:

“Isn’t it obvious? I’m here to see you, of course,” Jesse replied with his usual confident demeanor. He had been waiting right outside and as soon as he’d seen Rachel come out of the room, he was right in front of her. He didn’t care whether or not any of the other New Directions’ kids would’ve spotted him. “I’m not here to spy but you were amazing in that last number-- someone might want to tell Finn that he was a little pitchy on the last refrain because he probably doesn’t even realize.”

Jesse smoothed out the front of his jacket, playing with the ends of his chiffon scarf for just a moment before smiling at Rachel. “Vocal Adrenaline is taking a break from rehearsals today-- a rarity-- so I thought it'd be the perfect opportunity to see you. Is your boyfriend going to mind if I'm here to see you?"

Rachel Berry:

Rachel felt a little apprehensive about seeing Jesse at all much less alone, especially considering the smile that involuntary spread across her face at the way he told her he was there for her. Their history was complicated and Jesse had a great track record of making her feel on top of the world and then ripping the rug out from under her. For some reason, however, she trusted him each time. Even now despite her apprehension she could feel the trust. 

Rachel chuckled, shaking her head. “Finn was fine, he’ll be ready by competition. We did win Sectionals after all.” A cheeky grin spread across her face as she looked at her former lover but it quickly faded when he mentioned Hunter. She felt mildly uncomfortable in that moment, thinking she should maybe tell Hunter about this little run in. “I’m sure Hunter wouldn’t be thrilled to know you’re here, especially considering that I’m grounded and not even allowed to see him.”

Nibbling on her bottom lip, Rachel glances around again before sighing. He had come all this way to see her. “I can’t really hang out too long because my dads will be home in a couple of hours and I’m supposed to be home when they get there…” she offered, letting him know that if he wanted, she could make the time for him.

Jesse St. James:

“Congratulations on the Sectionals win, by the way. It’ll be fun to see you and your boyfriend go head-to-head at Regionals; I’m sure we’ll be seeing you at Nationals again this year,” Jesse grinned. Upon hearing that she and Hunter were banned from seeing each other due to her being grounded, an idea popped into his head. Any time an opportunity presented itself to Jesse, he was raring to grasp it at first chance. 

“So let’s go to your house,” Jesse suggested, completely unbothered with the fact that he just invited himself over to Rachel’s house. “I’m sure your dads will be supportive of you getting homework help from me; I did go to college, after all.” Of course he intentionally left out the fact that he’d dropped out because he didn’t actually go to his classes. But that wasn’t a necessary detail right now.

Rachel Berry:

“Thank you,” Rachel grinned. “It will be a lot of fun because he’s as competitive as I am. That is if the Warblers even let him stay long enough.” She rolled her eyes, sighing as she thought of all the drama that Hunter had been through so far this year. “Of course I’ll be at Nationals. I have to win, it’s crucial to my reputation-- if I can start out in the Broadway scene as a national show choir champion it’ll be extremely helpful in getting the respect that I deserve.” 

Rachel raised her eyebrows at how forward Jesse was, though it shouldn’t have come as such a shock. “Jes, what makes you think I can have anyone over if I can’t have my boyfriend over?” She asked him, nodding her head towards the way she would begin to walk. “Wait, you want to help me with my homework?” She giggled. “Do you even know anything about Trigonometry?” Rachel couldn’t remember the last time - if there was ever a time - that Jesse even talked about homework or anything that wasn’t related to show choir or Broadway.  “I have some make-up homework- I actually could use help on it.” She said as she approached her locker, opening it up to grab the homework she needed to take home. “I had thought about sneaking out to Westerville but I don’t really have a way to get there and back before LeRoy and Hiram get home so..” She shrugged. 

Jesse St. James:

As Rachel walked towards her locker, Jesse accompanied her and met her pace. “Yeah, I’m great at math,” he boasted, though he honestly couldn’t say what he knew what trigonometry even looked like. “It’s just like, adding and subtracting stuff, right? How hard could it be?” At the mention of her going off to Westerville, Jesse nibbled on the inside of his cheek. He wanted to say something about how that was a bad idea and Hunter was causing her to neglect her studies but he thought it wiser to keep his mouth shut.

“Oh, before I forget,” he spoke up as she rummaged through her locker for her things. He pulled out a slim jewelry gift box, held closed by a simple gold ribbon. “I brought you your birthday present in case we don’t see each other before then. I figured you could use the pick-me-up after being grounded, too.” He handed off the box, giving her an expectant look for her to open it now. He looked happy and hopeful as she opened it to reveal a necklace with a small gold star charm.

Rachel Berry:

Rachel shook her head as a giggle fell from her lips. She wasn’t sure if he was joking or not but she was among towards him being serious which was no help to her. Still, it would be nice to have the company for a little bit. She was about to speak again when Jesse interrupted her by pulling out the small jewelry box. 

“What’s this?” A grin spread from ear to ear as she closed her locker and took the gift from him. When she opened it up to reveal the golden star, Rachel’s stomach flipped. “Oh, Jes…” her grin faltered a little bit as the weight of the gift settled in her. It was incredibly sweet and it made her heart skip a beat. “You shouldn’t have, I can’t accept this..” she tried weakly to deny his thoughtful gift. “It’s too much.” Her brown eyes looked up to meet his, her voice soft. 

Jesse St. James: 

“Stop it, it’s your birthday gift,” Jesse pushed, taking the gift box from her and stepping behind her. “A girl such as yourself should have the best accessories to accentuate your beauty and talent.” He helped to put it around her neck and once he was done, he returned to stand in front of her to get a good look. “See? It looks perfect.” You look perfect.

So it was probably pretty obvious to everyone that Jesse still had feelings for Rachel but that didn’t mean he couldn’t do nice things for her-- especially since the gift was for her birthday. With Hunter out of the way for the time being, he knew this was his chance to get back in Rachel’s good graces and establish himself as her close friend. “So? Are we going back to your place to study?”

Rachel Warbler:

Rachel bit down on her lip as Jesse moved to slip the necklace around her neck, placing her hand on the small gold star that now rested on the base of her neck. It was the sweetest gift anyone had ever given her. When he came back to get a look at her, a blush painted her cheeks at his words. Shaking her head gently, Rachel smiled at him. “Thanks, Jesse. I really love it.” She felt the warmth in her cheeks spreading down her neck, the effect he had on her was obvious and she was regrettably transparent. 

When Jesse suggested going to her house, she let out a soft sigh, checking the time. “I suppose, but you have to leave at five. You can’t be there when my dads get home, I’m walking a fine line and I don’t want to not see Hunter until we graduate.” She explained as she gathered her things, closing up her locker for the day. Hunter. She again felt compelled to let Hunter know that Jesse had showed up. “And you have to help me with my homework to some extent- no distractions.” Rachel pulled out her phone as she led the way to leave the school, sending a text to Hunter to give him the heads up that Jesse showed up at McKinley and was giving her a ride home. “Can I get a ride home?” She asked Jesse, glancing over at him. “My dads dropped me off and I’m supposed to get a ride from Kurt but there’s no need for him to go out of his way since you’re here.” She smiled.

Jesse St. James:

Jesse grinned ear to ear when Rachel finally agreed to him coming over. Even if it was a few hours, he’d take what he could get. “Yeah, of course. My Range Rover is parked right over here,” he gestured in the direction of his car once they were outside. “I promise I won’t do anything to distract you but I also wouldn’t be opposed to singing with you if you wanted; it’s been a while since we’ve had a duet together. You know our voices sound phenomenal together.”

When they both got into the car, Jesse’s phone connected via bluetooth and he scrolled through his music, looking for the perfect song for such an occasion. He knew the Rachel Berry he loved-- who also loved him-- was in there somewhere… He just needed to coax her out. The opening melody of Roxette’s Listen To Your Heart started playing over the speakers as Jesse started driving out of the parking lot and towards Rachel’s home.

Rachel Berry:

A smile spread across Rachel’s face when Jesse suggested singing with her. It had been a bit since they’d had the pleasure of singing together and she would be lying to herself and everyone else if she said they didn’t fit together vocally. He was the only person that could ever keep up with her talent. That is, until she met Hunter. “I suppose a harmless duet wouldn’t hurt.” She said as she got into his car, settling in and buckling her seatbelt. 

When she heard the first note of the song flow through the speakers, her stomach clenched and she glanced over at Jesse, a small grin tugging at her lips. She knew the song and she knew it well, obviously. His choice of song wasn’t lost on her and she knew that she shouldn’t lead him on-- but she also couldn’t resist a chance to belt out one of her most favorite classics.  Shifting in her seat a little, she folded her hands in her lap, closing her eyes.

I know there's something in the wake of your smile I get a notion from the look in your eyes, yeah You've built a love but that love falls apart Your little piece of Heaven turns too dark

Jesse St. James:

Jesse had known that Rachel couldn’t resist this song. When she started singing in that crystal-clear voice that Jesse adored so much, he couldn’t help but to smile and nod his head. He kept his eyes on the road but glanced over to her whenever he had the chance. These days, it was rare for him to hear Rachel singing unless it was at a competition. Singing with her was an even rarer occurrence.

When the next verse started, he sang along with her. Just like the first time they sang Hello together in the music library those years ago, their voices melted together beautifully.

Listen to your heart

When he's calling for you

Listen to your heart

There's nothing else you can do

While stopped at a red light, Jesse looked over to her and when he caught her gaze, smiled brightly at them. Regardless if on a big stage, in the choir room, or doing a little karaoke in the car, Jesse always enjoyed singing with her.

Rachel Berry:

When Jesse’s voice melted with hers during the chorus, Rachel couldn’t stop the smile that appeared on her face, looking over to Jesse to catch his eye when they were stopped. 

Sometimes you wonder if this fight is worthwhile

The precious moments are all lost in the tide, yeah

They're swept away and nothing is what is seems

The feeling of belonging to your dreams

She kept her eyes on Jesse as she sang with him, giving it her all as usual. She could feel something crawling up from the depths of her heart, something that was supposed to be shoved deep down to never be touched again. It felt good to sing with Jesse but for a brief moment as she looked to the man next to her she saw Hunter- the mirage taking her breath for a split second. Rachel shook her head, she sang with other people all of the time, it didn’t mean anything because it was Jesse.

The only man who’d ever come close to knowing her as much as Hunter did.

Jesse St. James:

Jesse was in high spirits as they continued to harmonize through the song. He liked the way she looked at him when they sang to each other. After the song eventually came to an end, Jesse turned down the volume as the next track played.

“Still as amazing as always; it’s a wonder why you’re not already on the fast track to Broadway,” he said to her. They were just a few blocks away from her house by now. “It’s too bad you can’t pass all your classes by just singing… You’d be valedictorian.”

When they pulled up to the house, Jesse parked his car in the driveway. It’d been a little while since he’d been over to her house-- not since when they were still dating each other. It almost felt like stepping into a timewarp, into the past.

Rachel Berry:

Rachel blushed again for the second time that day when Jesse complimented her, giggling softly. “That’s really sweet.” She said, looking over at him as he parked. “What about you, though? You’re equally as talented as I am...if not more so. You shouldn’t be here in Ohio-- you should be in New York already.” She shook her head, her tone serious. “I know Vocal Adrenaline is important to you...but they’re holding you back.” 

She knew from the times they’d spoken that Jesse wasn’t back solely for Vocal Adrenaline-- but for her. “You can’t let anything-- including me-- hold you back.” Nibbling on her bottom lip, she grinned a little, reaching over to place her hand on his. “You’re too good for this place, Jes.” Rachel gave his hand a gentle squeeze before moving to take off her seatbelt. 

Jesse St. James:

Jesse was quiet for a moment after Rachel told him that he shouldn’t let anything hold him back. It was nice that someone believed in him-- that he was destined for bigger and better things than Ohio. He squeezed her hand back and smiled at her. “This is just a temporary gig-- another credit I can list on my growing résumé,” he insisted, knowing that he couldn’t be confined to such “small picture” ventures.

When they exited the vehicle, Jesse let Rachel lead the way up the path towards the front door. “But for the record, it isn’t you that’s holding me back,” Jesse clarified, pausing for a moment to clear his throat, “New York is still my future. You’re part of that future, too.”

Rachel Berry:

Rachel paused briefly with her keys in the door as Jesse reiterated that she would be part of that future. It was sort of flattering that Jesse was so adamant. She may be part of his future career-wise but romantically she just couldn’t do it. Anytime the thought tried to crawl out from the back of her mind all she could see was Hunter. “We will take over the Broadway scene,” she chuckled, opening the door to let them in. “Our names will be in everyone’s mouth.” She dreamed for a moment about her and Jesse being friends and being a powerful force in New York together. 

“You and Hunter getting along is crucial, though, or it’ll never work.” Rachel cleared her throat as she led him into the dining room, placing her things on the table. She was suddenly very aware that she was alone with Jesse and it made her palms a little sweaty. “So, uh, trigonometry…”

Jesse St. James: 

"Oh, definitely. The first time you have a leading role, you and I will win for Best Actress and Best Actor; we'll do so much press as the two ingenues from Podunk, Ohio who made names for themselves-- together." Jesse followed Rachel into her home, also acutely aware that with her parents not present it made them very much alone. He took the time to take a look around, familiarizing himself with how things looked similar to the last time he was here. Nostalgia washed over him, picturing his teenage self with a doe-eyed sixteen year old Rachel Berry singing duets together around the piano in the living room.

Jesse forced himself to step away from the past, aware that he needed to put himself in the present to continue being part of Rachel's life. "So what's Hunter's plans? College in New York? He probably wants to do something boring like being an accountant, right?"

Rachel Berry:

Rachel chuckled to herself as she took a seat at the table, noticing the way Jesse skirted around her prompt for the homework help that he’d come for. She should’ve known better-- Jesse couldn’t actually help her with her homework. He just wanted to spend time with her and if she were being honest, she did, too. She wanted to spend time with him without Hunter around so she could assess Jesse’s actual intentions and feelings and if he could actually handle just being her friend.

“I told you, we’re moving to New York. He’s wanting to go to Cornell- which, admittedly, isn’t ideal because it puts two more hours between us than we have now but it’s not like we can’t make it work. We’ll meet halfway most times, I’m sure.” She said, having not given much thought to their future other than the fact that they were going into it together, even if it meant being apart for a few more years. “His father wants him to go into the Navy, follow in his footsteps. But we haven’t talked about that much, though.” Nibbling on her lip, Rachel tried to push the thought from her mind as she usually did. She hoped that when the time came, Hunter would choose her over the Navy without prompt and she didn’t have to be that girl.

Jesse St. James:

“Navy?” Jesse murmured to himself, wondering how that would impact Rachel’s future. “So he’ll be on a boat somewhere? Like a sailor out to sea for weeks and weeks at a time..? Doesn’t sound like fun.” He finished perusing through the living room before returning to Rachel’s side at the dining room table. Her books were spread out on the table and when Rachel opened up the math book, his eyes became wide like saucers. He couldn’t make heads or tails of what he was looking at, but he wasn’t about to make that apparent.

“A sailor and a broadway superstar don’t really mix, do they? It’s not exactly the ‘Broadway power couple’ I envision when I see you walking down the red carpet at events.” Jesse flipped through the pages of the trigonometry book, eyes scanning the content to see if there was even a little bit of something he understood so he could help.

Rachel Berry:

Rachel sighed, looking down at the table as Jesse mentioned Hunter being away for long periods of time out in the middle of the ocean. She really hadn’t taken a moment to sit alone with those thoughts and really assess. She thought being grounded from Hunter was bad, but what about when he was shipped off somewhere and she couldn’t speak to him every single day whenever she pleased? She suddenly felt nauseous.

“M-maybe it’s not ideal. But it’s what he wants...he doesn’t hold me back from what I want.” She was trying to convince herself rather than Jesse. “If...if the Navy is what he wants to do then I can’t stop him.” Rachel trailed off, thinking of the first date she’d gone on with Hunter when they had discussed their lives. “Though...I don’t really think it’s what he wants really. I think his dad is more or less pressuring him into it.” As these thoughts began to nibble at her anxiety ridden brain, she wasn’t so much focused on getting to her homework. Glancing over at Jesse, Rachel shook her head. “Do you know anything about the Navy? Do they, like, go to actual war?” She realized then she had little to no knowledge of any military branch.  

Jesse St. James:

Upon hearing that Rachel wasn’t especially supportive of Hunter’s decision to join the Navy, Jesse thought to himself that perhaps he found the fracture in their seemingly perfect relationship. It would be cruel to manipulate Rachel, but honesty was the best policy… Being upfront with her about his opinion of the military wasn’t the wrong thing to do, right? “Oh, I’m pretty sure people in the Navy go to war,” he answered, leaning back in his chair a little. “I mean, I only know from television but there’s a bunch of ships and submarines in the ocean watching the Koreans, right? It’s like, an island, right? So it’s surrounded by water. Isn’t the US. on the brink of a war with them right now?”

He backed off a little when he realized he might be scaring Rachel. “Maybe you can convince him not to join the military. The guy’s in show choir too, right? I mean, there’s no way he can get into NYADA but lots of actors hack it in New York without an education. He could totally get an ensemble role.”

Rachel Berry:

“War?” Rachel asked, looking at Jesse with her forehead wrinkled, the nausea turning her stomach again. “L-like, war?” She shook her head, imagining the worst case scenario. There was a vivid image in her mind of her in New York, alone. And then another of her coming backstage from curtain call of one of her shows to a phone call letting her know that Hunter was dead and never coming back. She took a shaky breath, closing her eyes and shaking her head as she tried to calm the anxiety that was rapidly building in her chest. 

“Uh, yeah,” She cleared her through, pressing her lips together as she looked down. “He’s extremely talented. He’s better than me, even. Well...at least just as talented.” Rachel explained, rubbing her hands over her face, taking another breath. “I just don’t…” She tried to get the images out of her head again, sighing. “Maybe...maybe he won’t go. Maybe he’ll change his mind and realize that it’s not his dream and he’ll find something else. Y-yeah...maybe.” Rachel placed her hands down on the table, sitting up a little straighter, visibly uncomfortable, anxious. She didn’t want to think about this anymore, it was scaring her and she didn’t have Hunter there to comfort her and talk it through. She didn’t want to have an anxiety attack in front of Jesse, either, regardless of whether or not he’d seen it before.

Jesse St. James: 

Jesse mentally kicked himself when he realized Rachel was on the verge of an anxiety attack, clearly caused by him. “If anyone can convince someone into doing something, it’s you. If he really likes performing as much as either of us you can convince him to do something else with his life. Besides, who goes to college just to waste it in the military? That’s just dumb…” Maybe he would talk to Hunter too; it was the least he could do after making Rachel unnecessarily worry. “I mean, weren’t you just talking about Ohio and Vocal Adrenaline holding me back? Don’t be surprised to run into me this time next year because I am definitely going to New York, too. Even if I have to bus tables while I go to every audition out there, I’m going.” 

His tone about New York was much more self-assured than before and it was all thanks to Rachel’s words. She had an innate ability to cheer anyone on, right beside them. Even if Rachel wasn’t actually doing anything, she really was a driving force for Jesse to find his place. He just hoped that when he landed on his own two feet Rachel would be standing right beside him.

Rachel Berry:

Rachel just nodded her head as Jesse tried to talk her down from the looming anxiety attack. “I guess. I...I don’t even really want to think about it anymore.” She tried to get the jarring images to leave her mind as she took a deep breath, appreciating the way Jesse changed the subject. 

“Y-yeah...I know you’ll be there. I don’t doubt that.” She looked over to Jesse, placing her hand on his. “That’s why it’s important to me that we all get along. We’re going to be in each other’s professional lives at the very least.” She said, giving him a gentle smile. “It’ll be really nice to have a familiar face to work with, I’m glad it’ll be you. I mean that.”

Jesse St. James:

Jesse nodded a bit when she agreed that they’d all be in New York together. At least while Hunter was in college figuring his future out, Jesse would be the third wheel; he had that much guaranteed for him and he was completely fine playing the slow game. Rachel had almost gone back to him once before, so it was only a matter of time. “Right? The three of us will be bonafide New Yorkers in no-time. Now c’mon, I promised to help you with your math homework so tell me what chapter you’re on and I’ll look up the answers on my phone.”

He was satisfied that he managed to talk her down a bit and she was smiling, so he took it as a good sign. Her worries were obviously still there because a matter like that wasn’t going to be overlooked; Jesse knew her too well to know that he’d inadvertently planted a seed of anxiety somewhere in Rachel’s brain. One thing was certain to him, however: if Hunter was going to commit to the military, things might not work out for him and Rachel. That was the golden opportunity Jesse had been waiting for.

#rachel berry rp #jesse st james rp #st berry rp #glee rp #1x1 rp #paras #para: rachel #rachel

[ilovereadingandilovebreathing]

Okay so Sal is mega sick and Larry takes care of him. Maybe even takes him to the doctor bc Sal will n o t do ir.

Oh my goodness. I’m sorry this took so long. I’ve been so swamped and exhausted and just uninspired, but obvs. I was on a random SF kick today, so here’s....this.

Sickfic with really fluffy moments in which Lisa is a total mom and I LOVE HER.

Warnings for vomit, vomit mentions, fever, moaning and groaning about....sick stuff. Nothing too graphic.

——————

2pm on a bright Saturday afternoon found Larry Johnson rolling out of bed, finally submitting to the passage of the day when Addison’s groundskeeper (aka his mom) started up her leaf blower right outside his window. Groaning, he crossed to he worn panes and threw open the curtains. “Moooooooooom!” He yelled over the din, rolling his eyes when she grinned mischievously in response.

“Morning, or should I say ‘afternoon,’ Lar-Bear!” She teased.

“It’s not even fall yet!”

“Fun way to get you up now that the vacuum is on the fritz!” She laughed.

“UGH!” Larry huffed in false annoyance before closing the curtains and trudging to the bathroom for a shower, noticing the late hour for the first time. He hadn’t slept that long on a Saturday since…probably since Sal showed up. His blue-haired buddy was normally his wake-up call. He’d have to investigate…after he actually woke up.

———-

“Hey, Mom?” Larry stumbled into their living area about half an hour later, rubbing his eyes and yawning widely even after the shower. “Has Sal come by today?”

“Not that I know of. Is everything okay?”

“That’s what I’d like to know…” He mumbled. “I’m going to Sal’s!”

“Okay! Let me know if you’ll be home for dinner.”

“Probably will,” Larry called back while closing the door. “You know Henry’s cooking varies in quality.” He heard his mom chuckle from behind the door as he headed toward the elevator.

When he reached the fourth floor, Larry narrowly avoided running into Robert as the punk headed out. They exchanged a laugh and their customary fist bump and nod before Larry asked, “Seen Sal today?”

“Nah, dude.” Robert replied before the doors started to close. “But I’ve heard some gnarly hacking coming from his apartment.” He managed just before the doors closed.

“Ah, shit.” Larry muttered, turning toward Sal’s apartment with his hands in his pockets. “Hey, Mr. Fisher?” Larry called. When he was met with silence, he let himself in. “Henry? Sal?” Larry called into the quiet apartment. “Sal?” Larry called again as he gently knocked on Sal’s door. “Sally Face?”

“Here, Larry Face.” A voice that sounded vaguely like Sal’s invited him in.

“Sal?” Larry peered around the doorframe to find his friend curled into a lump on his mattress, all lights off and his curtains pulled closed. “You okay, dude?” Larry crossed into the room, leaving he door partially open.

“Been better. Definitely been worse.” Sal grumbled.

As he approached Sal’s beside, Larry noticed the boy’s prosthetic on top of his dresser. “Bad night?” Larry asked quietly, hoping Sal’s nightmares hadn’t returned.

“Bad night and bad day-“ Sal erupted into a stream of coughs, moaning as he curled into himself.

“Geez, dude, what’s wrong?” Larry barely made out Sal’s shrug in the dim lighting. “Where’s Henry?”

“Work meeting.”

“On a Saturday?”

Sal shrugged. “He’ll take what he can get at this point, I guess.” Sally slowly turned over to face Larry, the light of the doorway only catching his mangled chin and a portion of his torso, and he let out a guttural groan.

“What’s with the noise?”

“My whole body hurts. It aches like…god I don’t know, like I’m 85 years old with arthritis.”

“Geez. Sounds like my granny before she died.” Sal inhaled sharply, and Larry threw up his hands and forced out a chuckle. “Granny was 94, dude, you’re fine. Your 16 year old ass better bounce back better than her.”

Sal let out a rough chuckle before exploding into coughs again. “Oh god, I think I’m gonna hurl-“

“What-“

“TRASH CAN!” Sal’s raw yell threw Larry into action; thankfully, he knew Sal’s room well enough to locate the bin by Sal’s dresser before it was too late.

“Here!” Larry thrust the plastic container toward his friend just as the younger boy emptied his stomach of its contents. “Geez, dude, longest hurl I’ve ever heard, and my mom had a nasty stomach bug last year.” Larry grimaced as Sal let the plastic can fall to the floor with a soft thud. “You feel any better?”

“A little.” Sal admitted, moving back into his prior fetal position. “Stomach isn’t cramping anymore, but I’m tired as hell.”

“Makes sense.”

Sal sniffed loudly. “Could you get me some toilet paper? I can’t breathe through my nose.”

“I’ll do you one better, dude. Supply closet is in the basement. I’ll get you real tissues, antiseptic, two more trash cans, and we even have some extra pillows down there if you want.”

“Sounds perfect.”

“Mom makes the best soup. I’ll ask her to make you some.”

“Thanks, Larry Face. You’re the best.”

“No problemo at all, Lil’ Dude. I’ll be back.”

“Okay.”

Larry threw his friend a grin and a pair of finger guns before backing out the door. As soon as he left, though, the smile fell, and he left the apartment at a brisk pace.

“Hey, Mom!” Larry called as he entered his own apartment.

“Yea, sweetie?”

“Sal’s sick. I need the key to the supply room and your homemade Sick Away Soup if you have time.”

“Of course! Poor little Sal.” Lisa sighed as she fished her key ring out of her pocket. “I’m proud of your for helping your friend, Lar-Bear, but make sure you don’t catch it, too. We don’t need two sick kiddos on our hands.”

“No way, Mom! I’m immune! I didn’t catch that bug you had last year!”

“You barely saw me, honey bear. You were at school, and I hoarded everything I needed in my room.”

“Fair point, I guess.”

“Is Henry home?”

“Nah, Sal said he’s at some meeting.”

“Oh, well bring him here, then. We can’t have our little friend suffering over there alone, now can we?”

“Great idea, Mom. Thanks!”

“Be careful!” Lisa kissed her son’s head as she handed him the keys.

“Yeah, Mom, of course. When will the soup be done?”

“An hour, probably.”

“Okay, take your time, then. Sal just let everything out anyway, so he might need a little time.”

Lisa frowned. “He threw up? So it’s not just a cold?”

“No way. Threw up, coughing, snot city, real sore like Granny was-“

“That sounds like the flu, Larry. That’s a nasty thing to catch, and you haven’t been vaccinated this year-“

“It’ll be fine, Mom! My past shots will cover it!”

“That’s not how it works, Larry-“

“Gotta go, Mom! Friend in need! Be back in an hour!” Larry called over his shoulder as he speed-walked out.

Lisa sighed, turned on the biggest stovetop eye, and dug out her soup pot. “Better set up the pull out bed.” She grumbled as she pulled vegetables out of the fridge, but a fond smile pulled at her lips when she heard her son fumbling in the supply closet next door. “That boy’s heart is too good for him, sometimes.” She shook her head and pulled out her favorite cutting knife, already planning the next few days in the Johnson household.

———————

“Your salvation has arrived, little dude!” Larry announced as he walked back into Sal’s room a little later.

“Thanks, Larry.” Sal wheezed as his friend groped toward his bed in the semi-darkness. “Where’s the stuff?”

"At my place. My mom says we can’t just leave you here all sick and alone, so you’re coming over.”

“Are you sure?  But I don’t want either of you to catch this.”

“Don’t worry. She’s kept up with her vaccines and stuff this year, and I’m immune to that stuff because of past shots-”

“Larry, that’s not how it-”

“Anyway, how about I clean out your can before we go?”

“Larry, you don’t have to-”

“No problem, Sally Bro. It’s what best friends are for.” Larry gathered the biochemical hazard trash can. “No prob. at all, buddy. I’ve seen much worse; I promise. I unclogged Charley’s toilet once....” They both shivered. “So this’ll be nothin’.”

“If you say so.” Sal mumbled, and his friend slipped into the bathroom and was back out again soon.

“Not to be nosy, but have you eaten anything recently? Cuz that trash can-”

“No. I felt too rotten to get out of bed this morning.”

“Perfect. My mom makes the best soup for sickness, but she’ll probably start you off with crackers first or something. I told her we’d be back in about an hour because that’s when soup will be done, but I’m sure it’s fine if we go early. Come on.” Sal could just make out Larry’s hand reaching toward him in the darkness, and he shook his head.

“I just....my head hurts....and my prosthetic...”

“Oh.” Larry thought for a moment. “Maybe just in the hallway?” He muttered softly. “She won’t judge you, Sal. You gotta know that by now.”

“....”

“I mean, I won’t force you, of course.” Larry backpedaled at Sal’s silence. “I just-”

“No. It’s fine. I trust you guys.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah. Let’s just make sure we leave my dad a note.”

“Right.” Larry left to scrawl a sticky note message to the elder Fisher and quickly returned.

“Okay, then. To mi casa, it is.” Larry handed Sal his prosthetic and helped the sick boy out of bed, keeping an arm around his friend’s back as they stiffly trekked to the basement. The elevator left Sal a little dizzy, but they managed to stumble through the Johnson’s front door without issue.

“We’re here, Mom!”

“Good, just in time. I just got the crackers out.” Lisa called, coming over with an orange bowl.

“Told ya.” Larry chuckled as he guided Sal to the couch, noticing that his mom had turned off all but the kitchen light and a single lamp.

“You’ll be joining him soon, Lar-Bear.” Lisa rolled her eyes and handed her son the bowl after the boys sat down. 

“No, Mom, I told you I’m-”

“Doesn’t work that way.” Sal and Lisa chastised him simultaneously, exchanging a glance and a smile before Lisa went back to the kitchen.

“Try the crackers, and then we’ll see about the soup, Sally.”

“Thanks, Lisa.” Sal called weakly as Larry set him up with his pillows and blanket on the pull out bed. “And thanks again, Larry.”

“Just give us a blanket ‘thanks’ and save your breath, Sal.” Larry chuckled. “You need to rest to get better.”

Sal hummed in reply and settled in to the comfy space, his eyes drooping immediately, but Larry held out to bowl toward him.  “You gotta eat to get your strength back.”

Sal moaned but begrudgingly took the crackers, slowly nibbling on them as his friend settled back to watch TV. 

“Whaddya wanna watch?”

“I don’t care. I’ll probably conk out soon anyway.”

Larry nodded and put on a Cops re-run, his gaze straying between the screen and Sal every so often. “How’re the crackers treating you?”

“I feel okay, I think.” Sal replied, setting the now empty bowl down. “I can’t believe I’m hungry after that.”

Larry shrugged. “The body is weird.”

“So, what’s the verdict?” Lisa poked her head in. “Soup or no soup?”

“I could do soup.” Sal nodded. 

“Me, too, Mom!” Larry called, switching between stations to find something else to watch.

“Okay, kids, soup’s on!” Lisa announced a minute later; she placed each bowl near it’s respective recipient. “Let me know if you need anything else. I think I have some Ginger Ale somewhere.”

“This is perfect for right now, Lisa. Thank you.”

Larry rolled his eyes, and Lisa smiled. “You could learn something from him, Lar-Lar.”

“I have plenty of manners; Sal just has too many.”

Lisa snorted and left the boys to eat their lunches. 

When she heard the clink of bowls, Lisa returned and took the dishes back up, smiling at the lightly dozing Sal. Larry caught her gaze and nodded, a small smile pulling at his own lips, and both sets of eyes fell to the mask on their coffee table. 

“How was it?” Lisa whispered. 

“Great, as always.” Larry shot her a double thumbs up.

Sal stirred and opened his eyes. “It was good. I don’t feel nauseous at all.”

“It’s the perfect blend of satisfying and soft on the stomach.” Lisa smiled softly at Sal. “Your cheeks look a little flushed.” She mumbled, almost seeming like an afterthought to herself, but she set down the bowls and approached Sal, laying her cool hand across his forehead before bending over and tenderly placing her lips against the warm skin.  “Feels like a fever.” She straightened up and looked toward the bathroom. “I think we have some cold and fever stuff-” 

She faltered when she looked back down at Sal, noting the glisten in his good eye and the tightness of his jaw. She turned back to him and bent slightly, gently running her hand over his hair and smoothing the sweaty strands from his face. “We’ll take good care of you, Sally. Don’t you worry. Your family’s got you.” 

She patted his arm before heading toward the bathroom, returning with the mentioned medicine as well as a cup and washcloth. Sal’s hooded eyes followed her movements, and when she reached him, she helped him sit up, swallow, and drink. When Sal was settled again, Lisa dipped the cloth in the cup and slowly laid it across his forehead, laughing a bit at the small groan that escaped his lips as he finally let his eyes fall shut.

“You’re more dramatic than Larry.” She muttered fondly, laughing again at her son’s offended huff. “Point proven. But I’m glad it’s helping. You just sleep now, honey, and you’ll feel better soon.”

Lisa’s eyes jerked toward movement on the bed, and she found Sal’s hand extended toward her, fingers reached out beckoningly. She took his hand, and Sal gave a light squeeze and mouthed “thank you.” Lisa squeezed back and whispered, “Any time. We love you, sweet boy.” A shadow of a smile passed over Sal’s lips, but he didn’t let go of Lisa’s hand. Larry threw him a questioning gaze, but Lisa shushed him with a look and carefully set herself on the edge of the makeshift bed. She held Sal’s sweaty hand until his grasp went limp and his breathing became soft, heavy snores, and even after, she stayed to change out the washcloth and occasionally run her fingers through his hair, a sigh of contentment emitting from the boy with her motions.

When the thick tendrils of sleep finally tugged at her, as well, Lisa carefully extracted her hand from Sal’s and rose from the bed, blowing Larry a kiss as he waved before heavy eyelids. “Night, Mom. Thanks for all your help. You’re the best.”

“Good night, baby. I love you.”

“Love you, too.”

Sal sighed heavily and turned over in his sleep. 

“I think that means he loves you, too.” Larry laughed quietly.

Lisa smiled and nodded before slowly padding to her room, hoping to find things brighter and better in the morning. 

Spoiler Alert: She was right. Larry woke up sick in the morning, and he and Sal were bunk buddies for almost a week. They didn’t see each other for a day or two after that, but it was definitely a bonding experience.

#sally face #sally face fic #sally face fanfic #sal fisher #larry johnson #lisa johnson #sffanfics #mine

[queencryo]

@silly-go-round is asleep right now.

i guess i should make a journal for the past few days. as good a time as any. as AMY. heh. cuz shes super good and amazing. heh.

uh...... lessee.... for the two days after the last journal i just. hung out at the house while silly worked. i managed to not keep her in bed and make her late the second day. hung out a lot, watched more adventure time, worked on my tumblr filter script (lie. i judt ran it on my main. 200 posts / day is a bitchhhh) , played a good amount of ds3 (to pointof tetris effect at a couple points the nexg few days)

also did some like. helpful tasks. washed some dishes (undone quicklu, but. eh). not enough, mot as much as i shouldve, but... i tried i guess.

alao we've like. said the same thing at the dame time a Lot while ive been here and its like. nice. its really nice. same wavelength! i feel so close go her.

oh! alxo night before last we went grocery shoping. got food for prolly enoygh for the two weeks, but i guess we'll see. also a cheesecake! it was.... echausting. hily fuck it was exhaysting. jesus. the store was big and it took like 3 hours and $200 to get everything but. we did itttt.

we both mentionef that like. it felt nice to like. have a full fridge 2gether. cuz. it feels like were gonna have a futjre togetjer? u know. like that is. i love her a lot and it feels good for this to feel like a home for a little while. we hope that it can be so in tbe future.

so YESTERDAY she finally FINALLY taught me how to play magic the gathering. it was. a long time coming. but she brought me into the store and like. sat me down w some regulars and had me play commander. i played moooostly her snake deck, so like.that was fun!! i kept talki g about how i woulda gotten lorescale Coatl up to 39/39 and flying, had i like. gotten q more turn. but on that game D was running a mill deck that was. extremely long to play (that game took like ~>2 hours ugh), and was very bery annoying, so i didnt get to actually do that.

but it was fun! part of me wants to blog everything, but i dont think i will.

im glad to be able to use silly's decks, bc i dont think i want to make my own. im considering making a cheap angel deck or smth, but we'll see if yhat actually ends up happening.

i also met her girlfriend Iz, who is sweet. i played magic w her fkr a while, which was fun! she was runni g an annoying mono black deck (i kkow all these... these Terms and Words now, its incredible...)

shes sweet and i think i like her. dunno if enough to date yet (which makes me Partially regret flirting w her so much in the groupchat but. hey)

talked w her some, mostly about magic, hung out while silly closed the store, pet her cat, silly discovered that cyddling w TWO girlfriends is very nice (not rhat id know ;;;;;;;), was good times. i dont think im as comfy w izzy physically yet as i may have implied in messages, which hopefully wull be rectified by the message i just sent her (my initial physical comfort with people varies, it depends very much on the person)

skip forward, me and silly make a pizza at home cuz were fuckin tired, she admonishes me for not eating for uh... like 11 hours or smth (that mornings bagel was VERY good tho omg), but adderall, so like... meh.

uh... i dont think anything else on yesterday...

today! we waaamted to go to the store at like. 2. but in actuality got there at like! 330.

i went back to sleep cuz im a losenerd, and she. made this breakfast casserole thing. which hse put into a bagel abd brought to me bc i guess shes the best person on the entire earth oh my GOD. jesus

skip... apparently she knows maximum the hormone and doesnt like them very much... fair fair. (cause for xeath)

came to the store agai. tofay. it was fun and good. iz didnt come in today, do played some more with regulars. played w what is apparently called a blink deck, which revolvea arounf exiling cards then immediately bringing them back, to capitalize on "when this enters battlefield, do smth" cards. neat!

i DID actually manage to win today!!! the victory was. literally handed to me, but like. thats fine! i was playing silly's uhhh... elintor the masked? idr her name :( the mask planewalker! deck, which. i had SO much land, most of wh8ch was enchanfed. meaning it could be tapped then untapped w eljntor's thing, then tapped again for DOUBLE MANA. i mean. i had like 9/turn even b4 that but. BUT. i also had. i think i drew 3 creatures total. bit anyway. i had the white card that gave me a life whenever a creature was put on tge board (and also, w another enchantment, made all non-me creagurss and enchantments enter the board tapped, so. nya). so... rob had a card what dealt one damGe to all other players whenevr he puta. creature on the board. then he played united forces, which lets each player commit X mana to create X 1/1 soldier tokens on all players' boards. so. we made 28 white soldier tokens on everyones board. this killed perry, ans gave me, uh. 56 life (84 - 28). i then attacked ron for 28 w the soldiers, and drew sacred mesa, which lets me sacrifice 2 mana (1 any color, 1 white, but i had so many cards that said "this land can instead be tapped for 2 of any color, so like. ueah) to create a 1/1 flying pegasus token. so i. ended the game w 44 white 1/1 tokens. goblins get fucked.attack w my ssoldiers cuz his were tapped, so brought him down to 7 life. i didng catch what he did w the enchantment, but i think he said he like. put a copy of every creature on my side of the board onto his board, and then. cipying that enchantment 3 times. so. holy FUCK. wow. BUT those all came in tapped and i had 18 flying yokens, so. i still won! yay!!!! i won a game of magic!!!!!

goblin decks scare me. stop running krenko you fucks. exponential goblins goddamn

silly would come by every so often and like. look over my dhoulder and say "oh that was dumb whyd u use fabricate for thay" which is fair. but also god i love her. (i used fabricate for a mana generator insteaf of lightning greaves. whateverrrr) i love her so much dear god. i wish i coukd help w the store more, but. on the same time i also. dont enjoy working. so. maybe part time.

hm. what ekse. oh yeah i kove her so much.

by the end of the night it was just. me and her, rob and the two regulars i started out llaying w yestwrday. theyre sweet, i like them. theyre married. the dude calls me honey smtimes, which is. kinda weird? dunno how i feel about that. i guess fine. its gender-nice, but still a lil uncomfy. otherwise i like em fien, though. but they talked abouy moving into sillys apt. so thats cool!! better than her current (awful, terrible, lazy / horrifically depressed / manchild roomate, who doesnt clean ever) roomate. i was reading the monster of the week gamebook thruout, which i... bought, for some reason. idk. oh also i wanna make a fallen angel divine, because im... predictableeee. also a conspiracy thworist whos just a trans woman w way too much time and really weird hobbies (throwing knices, butterfly knife, net friends, etc). also a spooky. i speny like. 3 hours reading thr7 the monster of the week book while ppl played magic around me. i kinda wish i hadnt bought it, but hey! its neat c:

oh, also i didnt take adderall today. i dont think it went toooo bad, i think i like. was meaner and less thohghtful with what i said, but like. i guess thats better than feared. i took a caffeine pill (200mg) at ariund 10 which is. prolly why im wide awake right now. i regret doing that, sincr from what shes said tmos gonna be big)

she says we gotta be at her moms by 4, for reasons she WONT TELL ME. bit she says its part of one of her plans, i ASSUME the romantic one? im kind of afraid that ill like. no-sell it unwillingly because im abroke and soulless human being, but uh. i guess rhats thw risks we take to be alive :shrug: im excited. were also going to a shop (diff one) tmo, which im Quite excited for, as ive only been in similar shops by accident before. also doing laundry!!! which is important ^_^

oh ysah. so we got white castle on the way home. its. yeah she was r8ght. mediocre-at-best sliders. onions are bad.

we also made a pizza. whifh i ate most of. i overate. sob.

she fell asleep halfway thry an episode of nailed it. cant blame her, she seemed really tired. i hipe i dont disturb her rwst. and i feel so utterly blessed thay i can be around her.

ih!! i also fell down the last few staies ywstersay. bruised my arms, but otherwise fine. it was. idk, it is nice to knoe that others worry fir me and like me. she was very concerned. i love her.

#blog #ohio trip 2 #journal

[skia-oura]

Orange Lilies 12/12

A/N: Here we are, at the conclusion. Thank you all for taking this journey with me!

Prologue // Previous

Ao3

What comes after.

Epilogue

           Tommy Hangar, while late-night dusting, absentmindedly turned on the TV to a ‘breaking news’ report about some disaster in Kabul. She paid it little mind—it was just for background noise, after all—until she heard the magic phrase, “Alcor the Dreambender,” and then suddenly she was Very Invested in this cover story. Tommy dropped the Everlasting Handheld Dustmop (also known as a rag with a bunch of spells in it in order to make it hardier and better at dusting) and stared for a moment before she recovered her wits.

           “Hon,” she called out, easing onto the couch like she was afraid it might bite, gaze focused on the screen on the wall showing a couple of well-dressed reporters. “Hon, you want to see this!”

           “I’m in the bathroom!” Filara’s voice was muffled by the door and distance between them. Tommy reached out with one finger and slid the volume up on the television unit.  

           “…see, the damage to the city was located in a somewhat economically depressed sector just east of the main downtown center. It seems to have started in this block of rented townhomes, as you can see from the aerial shot provided by first responders to the scene.”

           “Then hurry pissing and get out there, you want to see this!” Tommy yelled.

           “It’s a number two!” Tommy heard, but shortly after there was the sound of the toilet unit being flushed. Tommy leaned forward, her elbows on her legs, and stared at the devastation depicted even as the news anchors described it.

           “Shockwaves were reported at 3:26 local time to a nearby fire station from a location nearly a kilometer away from the epicenter. Shortly after, several buildings shook as though an extended earthquake event was occurring. Pedestrians were thrown from their feet, and some were crushed under collapsing walls that were torn apart by the force of the blows exchanged between two demonic forces. As we said earlier, one of the two demons was positively identified to be Alcor the Dreambender.”

           On the screen, buildings were partially to fully collapsed the closer they were to the epicenter, a partially still-standing block of townhomes. One of them had a hole in the roof, from what Tommy could see before the view faded back to the two anchors, faces stern. Down the hall, the bathroom door opened.

           “That’s correct, Penny,” the centaur said, their tail swishing behind them in what Tommy thought might be agitation. “Several consulting demonologists on the second-response team were quick to point out that not only was Alcor the Dreambender participating in a fight, but his opponent was another rather strong demon titled Lilith. From what we understand, the battle lasted perhaps three minutes above Kabul before being relocated to the nearby Hindu Kush mountains, but the consequences of the short encounter were huge for Kabul.”

           “All right, what do I have to see?” Filara asked, reaching over the back of the couch and pressing a kiss to Tommy’s neck. Tommy shivered and reached up to curve her hand along Filara’s cheek.

           “Just watch,” Tommy said. Filara hummed, then did that thing where she just climbed over the back of the couch instead of walking around to the other side like a normal person. Tommy sighed, and adjusted so that she could lean against Filara, her chin hooking into the valley of Filara’s shoulder.

           “So far, almost five hundred residences and places of work have been labeled non-viable, just over fifty have been found dead, and a further ninety six people have been injured. Experts estimate that there should be another one hundred casualties, though they differ in opinion on how many of these casualties should be fatal or simply injured.”

           Filara hummed. “This is awful, but why should I be seeing this?”

           “Shh,” Tommy said, patting Filara’s stomach.

           On screen, the centaur’s human companion nodded gravely. She picked up a data pad, glanced down at it, and then addressed the camera. “While it is historically one of the less traumatic incidences of fighting between Alcor and other demons, experts say to exercise caution. According to these experts, Alcor’s reemergence after such a long period of inactivity is something to watch. Please do not attempt to summon Alcor the Dreambender, as you will be putting your life as well of the lives of everybody around you at risk.”

           “Oh,” Filara said. She rubbed her hand down Tommy’s side. “Ah. I see.”

           “Unsurprisingly, when looking at historical cases such as the event that caused the formation of the Californian Federation over two millennia ago, this demonic encounter also made big changes to the environment. Mishana, take it away.”

           The centaur nodded. “Of course. It seems that, from initial reports, that the massively toxic Kabul river has somehow been purified of said dangerous toxins. The river has never been clearer. This footage, of the site where experts are nearly certain the remainder of the demonic encounter took place, will show you this odd phenomenon currently taking place.” The camera shifted to pan a view of what looked like it was a normal mountain range just a while ago, but now was some kind of weird freaky smooth melted-stone valley. The hair on the back of Tommy’s neck stood up just looking at it. She got further goosebumps at the way the river changed from murky and viscous to clear and quick at one point near the far end of the valley.

           “Well,” Filara said. “I’m not sure I ever want him in my house again, nice as it was to talk to him.”

           “Don’t think we have any kind of choice,” Tommy said, quietly. She stared at the screen. “And, well, as fucking awful as that horror shit looks, it can’t be all bad? I mean, the river’s so clear you could probably peep through it and see somebody changing on the other side.”

           Filara huffed. “Yes, romantic, way to remind me of how we met.”

           “Accident,” Tommy drawled. She had let Filara know that her windows should probably be dimmed, just in case, and by the way that was a cute mole she had on her butt. “Also, this house is in one piece, right? And so are we? And that little kiddiwink hangs around him. Could be worse.”

           On the screen, the news agency showed videos of the destruction in the mountains next to ones of the devastation in Kabul proper. Filara sighed. “Could be worse indeed.”

Pandemonium Server: “Sigil_Works”

General Channel

 Karl Svinhish 7:39 AM

Posting in all channels: Just as a reminder to all personnel, today is a half-day! Please only work three hours of your six. If you work more, we will know. We will find you. You will go home at some point.

 Ennis Hart 7:41 AM

lol what u gonna do, u can’t stop us from thinking at home, we got shit to get done and thru before the Terminator comes back

also u don’t gotta do that in all channels smh

 Karl Svinhish 7:41 AM

We cannot stop you from doing anything outside of the workplace, but please be reminded that as Thinktank department personnel, our insurance does not cover you for any sigil work done outside the premises!

 Sally Minh 7:42 AM

wait, mr. farkas is back??

 Ziyi Zhang 7:42 AM

Wait what??? My favorite????? Where was he????????

 Ennis Hart 7:42 AM

how the shit is bentley farkas, destroyer of dreams and rejecter of perfectly good plans, your fav

 Ziyi Zhang 7:43 AM

Bentley Farkas is a God among Mortals and you should not profane his name like this

 Sally Minh 7:44 AM

honestly, mr. farkas is Sigils Goals

 Anish Wellington 7:44 AM

Do we know what happened to him? He was kidnapped, right?

 Lucas Onderon 7:45 AM

yall are loud way too early in the morning. go away morning people

 Ennis Hart 7:45 AM

yeah he kidnapped i think?? i think sally took that phone call

also lucas turn us on mute if you want to sleep

 Lucas Onderon 7:46 AM

But now were talking about the mysterious mister farkas I need to put in my two cents

 Sally Minh 7:47 AM

yes, the police said that there had been an incident and that it looked like mr. farkas had been the victim of some kind of kidnapping, and had officially been listed as a missing person. they only  told me because literally nobody else was at work.

 Anish Wellington 7:48 AM

Thank you Sally. I will be sleeping again but if there are any updates, please tag me.

 Sally Mihn 7:48 AM

Ok!

 Lucas Onderon 7:48 AM

and that is that benny boy might act super nice and be super smart and all that shit, but he got a stick up his ass and needs to chill out instead of freaking out over every single proposal we send him. hed gotten unbearable after minhaj left.

 Ziyi Zhang 7:49 AM

#internlife

also u know that @BentleyFarkas is in this chat, right?? He’s going to see all of this.

 Lucas Onderon 7:50 AM

hes nerver in here nayways

lkadjklwj

*never in here anyways

 Karl Svinhish 7:50 AM

Please refrain from being rude! We do not tolerate bullying and rudeness in this chat, especially when those being bullied have been kidnapped and recently escaped said kidnapping!

 Ennis Hart 7:51 AM

holy shit wait he escaped?? Not police action or whatever??

 Sally Minh 7:51 AM

Is he okay?

 Ziyi Zhang 7:52 AM

yeah is he ok? Any deets?

 Lucas Onderon 7:52 AM

Bentley ‘gives in to puppy dog eyes’ farkas actually escaped? What?? you cant just leve it at that

*leave

@BentleyFarkas explain

 Karl Svinhish 7:53 AM

Leave him alone! He is recovering, and will be on indefinite leave of absence.

 Lucas Onderon 7:53 AM

Paid???

 Karl Svinhish 7:53 AM

There is the possibility that he will be working remotely!

 Ennis Hart 7:54 AM

But u said we cant take work home???? insurance doesn’t cover outside work premises????

 Karl Svinhish 7:54 AM

That’s for the Thinktank department! Bentley Farkas has been consistently attentive to detail and is one of the leading minds in this field, and as such we have entered negotiations with our insurance agency.

 Ziyi Zhang 7:56 AM

why you hatin? bentley farkas is a god of sigils. i would say more but bentley is in this server.

 Ennis Hart 7:56 AM

U don’t see him in thinktank do u

 Sally Minh 7:56 AM

bc hes too good for thinktank

Bentley Farkas 7:57 AM

That’s bc Im too good at practics 4 u

 Lucas Onderon 7:57 AM

bc hes overrated is what and thinktank knows that

 Ziyi Zhang 7:57 AM

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BENTLEY??!??!!??!?

 Sally Minh 7:58 AM

mr. farkas???

 Lucas Onderon 7:58 AM

holy shit

 Bentley Farkas 7:59 AM

The rumors of my death were highly exaggerated. but im only saying that im alive and have my hands on a phone. i probs wont be coming back to work for a while. working things out.

 Ennis Hart 7:59 AM

send us a pic or ur an imposter

 Karl Svinish 8:00 AM

Please don’t feel pressured to do anything Bentley! We’re with you all the way. Also please send me the documents we discussed yesterday as soon as possible.

 Bentley Farkas 8:00 AM

It’s ok, promise not to scream.

IMG_59703

 Ziyi Zhang 8:00 AM

@AnishWellington GET BACK IN HERE HOLY SHIT

WHAT THE FUCK BENTLEY

           “Hey, this is Torako Lam! Leave a text for me after the beep, unless you’re my dads, in which case leave me a VM so that I can hear your voices! Have a great day, and stay cool.”

-beep-

           “Hey Tora, this is your dear old Dad! Just calling in to check and see how you’re doing. You missed our weekly call yesterday. I know that Bentley going missing has been a big blow, and I’m worried about you. Please call me back! If nothing else, I can sort of keep you company for a bit. Love you lots!”

-beep-

           “Torako, is everything okay? You haven’t responded to my texts or your Father’s. Your workplace said that you were on suspension. I just want to make sure that you’re doing all right. Tyrone hasn’t answered his phone either, and Bentley is obviously out of the question. Please call us back. Any time is okay, even at a god-awful hour in the morning. Love you so much, bye.”

-beep-

           “Torako, this is Mama. Your Father called me, said that your Dad and he hadn’t heard from you at all lately? What’s up with that darling? They’re getting frightened that you’re dead. I told them that that’s nonsense, you’re far too tough for that. Your Father and I made you, after all! Then again, we made you, so I am a very small bit worried. If you have some troubles you can’t tell your Dad or Father, you can tell me. I know I’ve been busy recently, but I can make time for you. Loves and smooches, your Mama.”

-beep-

           “Torako, what’s going on?? It’s been a week, and all we’ve heard out of you is one solitary ‘I love you, I’m alive’ text. Which, thank you, but also that’s worrying! Are you in danger? Is Tyrone gone too? I tried talking to some of your old hurling friends, but none of them know where you are. I will get on a port to your apartment in the next day if you don’t respond. I love you, but please tell me that you’re okay! Goodbye.”

-beep-

           “Yo, Tora, it’s Hana, long time no talk! So your Dad contacted me yesterday about you being like out of town or out of touch or something? And I’m a little concerned?? I heard from him that your life partner went missing, which is sad and also makes me worried about you. Are you okay? I’m here for you if you need me. Catch you later!”

-beep-

           “Torako, this is Officer Akuapem. Hepsa has been getting better. They think she can return to work next month. I hope things are going well for you. We are continuing to investigate. There seems to be a lead into Canada. We have been tracing emails. Maybe you already know this; we had a report of a break and enter a few days ago. It was to someone we thought might be tied into the investigation. Please be careful. Don’t do anything stupid.”

-beep-

           “Tora, this is Lata’s mom. She said something about seeing you last night! Thank you for following up on that message; you don’t seem to have received any of my texts, so I thought I would try my had at a VM. It’s been so long since I left one! Again, thank you very much. When you find Bentley, let him know he was missed! I hope he is okay. That’s all, thanks! Goodbye!”

-beep-

           “What’s going on Torako? Why did you send me that cryptic message that you love me and that if you don’t message me again you failed? What are you failing? Are you doing something stupid? Please don’t do this Torako. Don’t do this to us. Please be safe. I love you. Be safe. Stay safe. We love you.”

-beep-

           “This is your Father. Please be careful. Your Dad is worried sick. We love you. Stay safe. Come home soon.”

-beep-

End of messages. Do you want to delete these messages? Select yes, no, or other options.

Other options selected. Your options are: respond with call, respond via VM, respond via text, respond via film video, select and archive messages, forward mes—

Respond with call selected. Which messages would you like to respond to? Please select the releva—

Message “What’s going on Torako? Why—” selected. Sender: Dad. Time: 3 hours ago. Are you sure you want to select this message? Yes or—

Understood. Calling in three…two…one.

-ring-

-ri—

           “Torako??!”

“Yo, hey Dad. Uh. Hi. How are you.”

“Torako?? Are you okay?? Where are you, what’s going on, is everything all right, what in the Fathomless Seas made you send such a frightening message?”

“So, funny story.” A laugh. “Not funny, but I’m more or less okay, only minimally hurt and traumatized. It’s fine. Also we’re outside right now.”

Silence.

“Outside??”

“Yeah, and uh,” Torako said, “Bentley’s been through shit and there’s some stuff we haven’t told you. So like. Yeah. Don’t scream when you come outside.”

Footsteps. “Scream, why would I scream?”

Opening door. Quick inhale, then the start of a scream before it is muffled behind a hand.

“I’ll explain everything, I promise,” Torako said. “Can we…come in?”

A pause. When spoken, the voice is a little strained. “Okay. Come in please.”

“Thank you, now let me just—” A click, and a dial tone that cuts out.

           The study was large and well-lit by two giant windows. Their thin, magically reinforced glass panes somehow seemed to let in more sunlight than they should be capable of, like they were capturing brightness and magnifying it to a subtle degree. There was a slightly dusty off-white desk in front of the shorter window at the head of the room. Stacks of books and papers and tablets towered in neat, short little hills, and there was an old-fashioned ballpoint pen sat in the middle, near a clear space for the user to sit at and work. A pair of archivists gloves was nearby, and a desk lamp floated at one corner. At the other corner, there was a small vase with two bright orange lilies caught in stasis.

           Runes flared along the edges of the ceiling, turning brighter and brighter until they burst in a small thunderclap of sound. The wallpaper tore, burned, and ash rained down on the formerly pristine room. It dotted the long red couch perpendicular to the desk in deceptively soft flakes, fragile and dangerous all at once. Flakes of burning wallpaper continued to fall down even as another presence filled the room, blacks and golds and browns and pale skin. Alcor the Dreambender cast his gaze about the room, face utterly still as he took it all in. The ash did not touch him. Nobody entered the room.

           He blinked, long and languid, at the floor to ceiling storage shelves containing all matter of memorabilia and research materials. He stared out the window at the deep, endless ocean, waves crashing against the cliffs below. He set his eyes on the desk, inhaled, and then drifted closer. With one gloved hand, he picked up one of the stacked antique books—Gleeful, Silent, Ferocious—and looked through it, flipping the pages slowly. He paused on one and read it more carefully, then snorted. “They get the funniest ideas,” he said, and he shut the book, set it on the desk carefully.

           Then he tilted his head at the tome. It had some wrong bits, but it wasn’t all that bad. There were a few that were decent, actually. Dipper tugged them from under the other stacks, sending them sliding down and across the desk. Torako would like them, he thought. And a couple were like, super rare, so if nothing else she could sell them online and get bank.

           Alcor slid the books into his stomach, feeling a little sick at the memory of pulling the three of them out of him: Bentley unconscious and with a sluggish heartbeat, Torako wide-eyed and trembling and barely keeping it together, Haji freaked out beyond measure. He’d made a deal—those memories for the means to get out of Kabul and somewhere safe—but Torako had refused to, clutching Bentley to her with a wild, nearly feral look on her face. But they were safe, now. They were safe.

           Though, Dipper thought as he considered exactly what he’d just done with the books, he’d still be careful about pulling them out in front of people. Maybe he wouldn’t pull them out in front of Bentley or Torako at all. Yes. That was the safest option. Torako’s dads would also possibly mind it if he extricated the books from his demonic bowels via tentacle too, thinking about it. Alone. Alone it was.

           He then looked up at the splash of orange, the lilies in the crystal vase, spinning slowly midair. Alcor the Dreambender reached out, and his gloves melted away so that his bare fingers could touch the petals. Lurid. Bright. Beautiful.

           If he’d gotten his hands on Fantino’s soul, they would have either been eaten, or would have suffered debilitating allergies to flowers for the next several lives.

           Instead Dipper withdrew his fingers and looked at the flowers. Then, he reached out again, blue fire sparking along the channels of friction ridges in the pads of his fingers, and touched them. The fire sputtered, then flared, consuming the flowers and shooting down the line of magic tethering them to the desk. Dipper stared at it, looked through the desk to the manuscripts of new publications in progress, and smiled. The fire wouldn’t stop until the house burned down.

           Dipper stayed a moment longer just to see the books and the desk and the tablets burst into flame, and then he blipped out of the study and its long, beautiful windows and its pristine pale features. The windows caught the light inside and amplified it, gently, subtly, to glow a soft blue that didn’t alarm the neighbors until it was too late for anything of Dr. Vallian Fantino to be saved.

           The air was heavy with salt, enough that when Bentley opened his mouth and breathed he could taste it on his tongue. It was also heavy with the sound of the tide, crashing and crumbling and receding with the tide. This beach was empty because of the dangerously sharp rocks tumbling on the seafloor not even two meters in from the edge. Honestly, though, that suited Bentley just fine, early in the morning with the night coolness still clinging to the breeze. Bentley closed his eyes, and breathed it in.

           It had been five days since they’d gone home, to Torako’s parents, and he still wasn’t tired of the feeling of natural air against his skin. He was tired of having to eat soft, bland food, and was tired of how odd it felt to go to the bathroom, but he wasn’t tired of being somewhere that rubbed against his skin and filled his chest with thrumming energy. He wasn’t tired of being able to refuse to go to a hospital, and instead have a hospital come to him.

           He also wasn’t tired of the feeling of sand on his skin. Bentley smiled, and wriggled his feet deeper into the soft sand. When he opened his eyes, the residual magic of it glimmered, just enough to be noticed but not enough to be distracting. It was nice. It was okay. It would be okay.

           Out further, where the sand became damp and the waves foamed with the force of their collisions, the water also glimmered, deep and dark like Dipper sometimes was. Bentley could see it now, more than ever: Dipper’s continuing influence on the islands, even after a long two millennia. It would have been something that explained how Dipper was able to hide his energy signature here so well. It would have been something Bentley’s Dad would have loved to know. Bentley set his face in his hands, his elbows on his knees, and looked out to sea.

           “What would you have thought of all this?” Bentley wondered out loud. The wind picked at his short hair, his long sleeves and his pants, and he felt cold despite the relative warmth. He thought about Fantino, and said, “What do you think of me now?”

           “What does who think of you now?”

           Bentley stiffened, but let out a deep breath and looked up over his shoulder. “Torako,” he said, and the warmth inside him wasn’t fake even if his dumb brain wouldn’t let go of the fact he’d dreamed about her being mean. Ugh.

           “Me? I think you’re pretty great,” she said, a crooked smile on her face. She dug her toes into the sand, sandals hanging from two hooked fingers. Bentley let out a fond, exasperated sigh.

            “Thanks,” Bentley said. “I think you’re pretty great too. Most of the time, at least.”

           Torako gasped and held her hand over her heart. “Only most of the time? Your conditional love wounds me.”

           Bentley snorted. “Sit down already, you goof.”

           She laughed and sat, legs stretching out, heels digging long trenches into the soft sand. Bentley watched how the morning sunlight glinted off the scars running root-like over her shins and calves, tangled and thin and innumerable. They too glimmered with magical byproduct. Everything glimmered these days, just about.

           “Hey.” Torako nudged his shoulder with hers. “It’s not a big deal, doesn’t even hurt.”

           “Because the doctors caught it in time to mitigate the damage, you mean.” Bentley shut out false memories of physical and emotional abuse and leaned into her. “Otherwise, you might have barely been able to walk because it would have hurt you so much.”

           Torako hummed. “Eh.”

           “Your bones had been shattered and then fused back together,” Bentley said. “You’re lucky it was fresh enough and magical enough that they could do a localized rewind on the bones.” Curses weren’t generally regarded as lucky, but in this case it was lucky that they could treat Torako’s leg as a curse.

           “Not the end of the world.” Torako shifted her legs so that her ankles crossed. Sand clung, dry, to her toes. “Besides, it didn’t happen, I’m fine. It’s a non-issue at this point, unlike you.”    

           This time, Bentley gasped and held his hand over his heart. “I’m an issue?” He knew when to leave something alone, even if shattering and melting was pretty damn traumatizing in his book.

           “Shut up, you’re not,” Torako said, grinning. She tousled his hair, and he hid a smile behind one hand at the familiarity. “No, I’m talking about what that place did to you—and don’t say it’s just cosmetic, you little shit.”

           Back at you, Bentley thought but didn’t say. “I mean,” he said instead, waving a hand at his face, “It kind of is? I look very different, and the nurse that visited said there wasn’t anything physically wrong with me.”

           “Pssh, I don’t need a nurse to tell that you’re also cold, like, all the time.” She pulled him closer and he let her, because he was cold and she looked very warm. “And you look at stuff funny sometimes, and you haven’t touched sigils since coming back, and the theft detector at the grocery store screamed at you going in. I think we need another specialist to come in to see you, actually.”

           “Let’s not. Also, the detector wasn’t my fault.” Bentley frowned at the waves further out, not because they had done anything wrong but because the grocery store experience had been awful. He would have made the very bad decision of running away if Torako hadn’t been with him, and if she hadn’t been shaking herself. They’d ended up just going home and letting her dads do the shopping.

           “Yes, that is true. But they never went off on you before, so that place absolutely did something to you. Somethings, even.”

           Bentley took a deep breath. He closed his eyes, then gave her a little noncommittal hum and snuggled into her. She was warm, as he’d thought. Torako slid her hand into his. He listened to her heartbeat, steady against the backdrop of crashing waves. They curled further into each other in silence. Bentley ended up with his legs slung over the valley of her lap, head resting at the hollow of her collarbone, her chin nestled on top of his head. Her arms were secure around him. It was…nice.

           He’d almost drifted off when she asked, “So what’s next?”

           The first somewhat intelligible sound he made was “Huh?” It was also probably the third of fourth sound he’d made, the first few being byproducts of transitioning into clearer awareness. Somewhere in the distance, seabirds called out. The horn of a fishing boat sounded, the blare of it softened by space. Bentley let out a slow breath, content.

           “What do we do now?” Torako asked. “Somehow, even if by some miracle I graduate, I don’t think that Officer Akuapem would support me entering the police force. And will you even go back to work? What do we—what happens, after the shit that we just went through?”

           Bentley cracked his eyes open. Before him, the beach stretched on into the horizon, buildings rising out of it and pressing up, up into the sky. On the left was the sea, dark with crests of white, shimmering with sunlight and supernatural energy. “I’ve been considering it. Going back, I mean. But…”

           Torako squeezed his hand, and waited for him to answer.

           “Sigils are…hard.” Bentley looked at their hands, at his mismatched fingers interspersed between hers. “And I don’t think I’ll stay there forever. Plus, you’re higher priority. I’ll go wherever you need to.”

           “No, silly, I go where you go.” She hugged him tighter. “You were in there a long time. You call the shots.”

           “And you found me,” Bentley murmured. He shifted back so he could look her in the eyes, so that she knew how much she meant. How much she mattered. “You searched long and hard and found me. I wouldn’t have…” he stopped, suddenly filled with shame and guilt and horror. He looked away, to the sea.

           Torako leaned forward to kiss him on the forehead. “You would have died,” she said. “You would have killed yourself.” Her voice shook a little when she said the words for him.

           Bentley swallowed against the stiffness of his throat, because she was right, and because he couldn’t say it. He knew it, but he couldn’t say it.

           “And that…” Torako took a deep breath. She pulled him back to her with soft but firm hands. “That really upsets me. Really. But you were—alone, and desperate, for so so long, so. I understand. It’s not okay but…I understand.”

           He squeezed her hand, watched the waves crumble into the sand. Watched them pull back, and do it over, and over, and over.

           “And we’re going to talk about that, as soon as you’re ready. First, though—what’s next? We can’t stay with my dads forever. Tyrone just about gives them a heart attack every time he shows up, I’m sure of it. They’re going to snap eventually.”

           Bentley managed a short laugh. “Yeah.” He breathed in, then out, then in and asked, “What do you want?”

           “Me?”

           “Yeah,” he said. “I might be able to do remote work. So. What do you want?”

           This time, Torako was silent, and Bentley waited.

           “I don’t want to make you upset,” Torako said at length.

           “You won’t.” Bentley turned and pressed his cheek to her collarbone.

           She still hesitated. Birds called, the ocean sang a symphony, and somebody let out a jubilant shout for whatever reason, and Torako remained silent next to him.

           Bentley shifted to press a kiss to her collarbone instead of his cheek, and then slid his forehead to the same spot. “I promise.” If he got upset, he’d get over it.

           Torako let out a sigh of frustration. “Like, I miss it. Cult bashing. Parts of it, I mean, not everything. Being away from you sucked a lot.”

           He hummed to let her know he was still listening.

           “And I hate that you were missing. Like, even cult bashing, when I knew you were safe, I hated it. When I didn’t know? Hell. It was stressful, I was always tired, Dipper was a mess and I was a mess and everything was awful. Except, it kind of wasn’t. Looking back, there were parts I liked, you know?”

           When she didn’t continue immediately, Bentley prompted, “Like?”

           She nuzzled her nose into his hair. “Putting pieces together,” she murmured. “Not having all the bureaucratic tape to deal with. The thrill, sometimes. Imminent danger, not so much, but the adrenaline was…nice.”

           This wasn’t upsetting at all, though Bentley could maybe see why she thought he would think so. He didn’t say that yet, though. “So what’s next then?”

           There was a moment where all he heard from her was her breath, and then she asked, “You’re not upset?”

           “No,” he said. “So, tell me—what’s next?”

           “I,” she said. Then, she laughed and she tousled his hair again. “I asked you first, fishbrains! What’s next, huh, Bentley?”

           “Hey!” He swatted at her hand and rolled off her lap to kneel next to her. She was smiling, hair still slightly damp from her morning shower, tank-top sliding off her right shoulder. Her eyes gleamed with something that wasn’t magic, but Bentley almost felt was. Fondness blooming gentle in him, he raised his hands and cradled her face between them. Her smile slipped, eyes wide, and she looked at him like he was the most amazing thing in the world.

           He loved her, he realized again. He loved her like he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her. He didn’t love her like he wanted to engage in any kind of kissing, or groping, or even dating, but he wanted—he wanted. He wanted her with him for the rest of his life, and it was a realization that he’d made a long time ago but still didn’t know quite what to do with. Torako was—vibrant, and wonderful, and he’d long resigned himself to the possibility of another person wedging themselves between them, better and stronger. And maybe it wasn’t a healthy thought; pan trios, and quads, and even quints existed in the world, but something in him didn’t want another person. The rest of him knew that was selfish, and wrong, and that if Torako wanted to go, if she needed to go—he wouldn’t get in the way.

           But by the seas and the stars did he love her.

           “We…take it a day at a time,” he said.

           “That’s specific,” she said, eyebrows quirking and mouth slanting up, cockeyed.

           “Oh hush. We take it a day at a time,” he said again. “We figure our shit out as we go, and know that things’ll go wrong but that’s okay. We talk.”

           “I would hope so.”

           He smooshed her cheeks in, and she laughed, eyes squinting almost shut with joy. Bentley laughed at the sight of her.

           Gripping her cheeks between his fingers and pulling them out a little, he said, “We do stupid shit and try new things and try old things again. We…don’t stay on Minte de Daos, because, you know, Tyrone.”

           Torako reached out and grabbed his own face, so he quickly let go of her cheeks. She smirked at him. “Good plan. Very detailed.”

           “And,” he said, shuffling closer. The sand shifted around him. “We go back home. You see about school, I see about doing work away from work and cutting it down to part time, because I’m…messed up.” He bit his lip, closed his eyes, and took a deep breath before soldiering on. “I’m messed up, and I need help but I can’t get it because of what exactly went down. So I do my best to help myself. And I do my best to help you help yourself.”

           Torako nodded. Her palms relaxed against his cheeks. “Yeah. I can’t be your therapist, and you can’t be mine.”

           “And then, when you’re done with school…you look into options. Like, I don’t know, a private investigator.”

           She wrinkled her nose. “Ugh, that’s so much paperwork.”

           “So something else,” Bentley said, just as he heard a soft noise, like something tearing, like the sound of smoothing out a sheet of paper. “We can—we can figure it out as we go. There’s nothing wrong with that.”

           “What are we figuring out as we go?” Dipper asked. “And why are we holding each other’s faces?”

           Bentley looked up at Dipper, staring down at the both of them. Torako did the same. Dipper’s eyes were black and gold, even though the rest of him was as human as possible. “What to do next,” Bentley said.

           “Yeah, Tyrone,” Torako asked. “What’s next?”

           Dipper frowned at them. He pressed his lips together, and something flashed across his face before he shoved it down. Bentley’s smile dimmed, and he opened his mouth to—apologize? Say something?–when Dipper grinned wide and a little too sharp, and said, “There’s lots of options, but apparently one ends with either Torako or Bentley with sand up to their necks, so. There’s that!”

           Bentley looked at Torako, her face framed by his hands. Torako looked at him, and squished his cheeks a little. Then Torako looked up, smiled prettily in that way that made Bentley’s internal alarms scream with urgency, and said, “I think you left out an option,” before tackling Dipper into the sand. Dipper squawked and went down flailing his limbs and sending beach flying everywhere.

           “Get off! I am an almighty creature of pure energy!”

           Torako caught Bentley’s eye over her shoulder, and he grinned. With a little trepidation, a little nervousness, he sunk his finger into the sand. There was a moment after where he stared at the sand, its magic, and wondered if this was really such a good idea. He’d caused a lot of damage, back in the pocket dimension. The sand had power of its own, who knew how that would interact?

           Dipper screeched, Torako laughed, and Bentley drew a sigil. Behind them, the ocean undulated, waves cresting white out of the darkness of the water, seafoam fizzing against the porous sand of the shore. The tides moved, the currents shifted according to latent, now natural energy. Above, seabirds called and searched for food. A fishing boat pulled in its haul, protected by spells to ensure it wouldn’t lose any of its catch to mercenary fowl. A man on the beach a kilometer away kept staring at his phone and grinning. The mermaid civilization a few clicks away wove new birthing homes into being. A children’s class practiced hula on the shore, a cervitaur held up a shell to the sun to see how the light shone through, an old married couple held hands and walked, slow, along the tide where the sand was wet and firm and their rings glinted in the early morning.

           The world glimmered, bright.

#transcendence au #orange lilies #tau fic #fic #torako #bentley #dipper

[jacobssibling3]

MC x Charlie, post- Battle of Hogwarts

I wrote a lil one shot about a certain Weasley’s funeral bc I love suffering anyway here goes

-

Today was the day. The worst day many of them had ever come to know. Today was the day they buried Fred.

The air was thick that May morning and the Burrow was silent. It was Molly who insisted on burying Fred in the back. She never wanted to be far from him again. This was the first time so many of the Order had reunited since the craziness of the previous year. Only this time, they were down a few numbers. Mad-Eye, then Tonks, Lupin, and Fred. It was as if the light that formerly blazed brightly had been stifled, choked out. Where did they go from here?

Molly was busying herself cooking after the burial. Arthur tried stopping her, but she refused. She needed to get her mind off things; she needed someone to take care of. Thankfully, she had a house full of people, with more trickling in as time went on.

Harry, Ginny, Ron, and Hermione were distracting themselves with little Teddy. Andromeda brought him to pay her respects to the young man who fought with her daughter for a better future for her grandson. Andromeda was currently helping Molly with the meal preparations, also grateful for the distraction.

“How does it feel to be a godfather, Harry?” Hermione asked as she let the month old baby grab her finger.

“A bit strange. I’m partially responsible for this tiny person but I’m-” Harry stopped when he realized Ginny and Ron had started softly crying again. Ron reached for his sister’s hand, which she gave him, squeezing his own. Hermione brought her forehead to Ron’s shoulder and grasped his other hand while Harry shifted Teddy to his other arm, slipping his free hand into Ginny’s vacant hand.

As they sat in quiet grief, another visitor arrived at the Burrow. She cautiously entered the house and looked around. Harry didn’t recognize her, but his observation of her was noticed by those near him, who also looked up.

Ron rubbed his eyes, “Blimey Gin, is that her?”

Ginny squinted, “We haven’t seen her in years, have we?”

“She was at Bill’s wedding before… everything that happened. But I didn’t expect to see her here. Charlie said she was in the Netherlands.” Harry and Hermione looked at each other with raised eyebrows as Ron spoke of the mystery woman. Before they could ask who she was, it seemed Molly had taken notice of her.

“Oh darling, my darling girl.” Molly ran to her and embraced her in a hug.

“It’s so good to see you Mrs. Weasley.” The woman wrapped her arms around the older woman.

“For the last time, I’m Molly. Or Mom, whichever you prefer.” The unknown woman blushed bright red, leaving Harry and Hermione confused.

“Who is she?” Harry asked.

“Charlie’s old girlfriend.”

“I never thought Charlie dated anyone.” Hermione posed quizzically.

“Just her. They went to Hogwarts together. She’s a friend of Bill’s too.” Ron watched his mother call after the rest of their family to greet her.

“She seems pretty close with your family. How come we’ve never met her before?” Harry was thankful for her arrival; it gave them something to do besides thinking of the unimaginable horror they experienced just a week ago. The woman was now being greeted by Arthur, Percy, and George.

“She’s working in Holland. She’s researching cultural differences between different wizarding communities.” Ginny looked at Ron. “We should probably go say hi.” The two begrudgingly stood, leaving Harry and Hermione alone with Teddy.

“I guess we ought to stay put.” Harry posited as the two watched the woman greet Ginny and Ron.

“Look at you! You’re all grown up.” She gave them a sad smile. “I hear that your whole family played a part in defeating Voldemort.”

“Something like that.” Ron shuffled, unsure on how to continue the conversation on such a heavy topic without opening the fresh wound.

“I’ve never been prouder to know you all. What you’ve done is amazing.” As she spoke, Bill and Charlie ambled up.

“Anya?” Charlie half-whispered. When she met his eye, she flushed and nearly threw herself on him. The two were wrapped around each other as if their lives’ depended on it, while everyone else watched. They quietly whispered to each other during their embrace when finally Bill cleared his throat.

“Good to see you too, Anya.” Anya pulled away from Charlie, reddening a bit, and hugged Bill.

“Sorry.” She mumbled.

“Nah, it’s alright. I know where I stand with you two.” Bill tried his best to smile before calling over his wife to greet his old friend.

As Anya spoke to the Weasleys, Harry watched her face shift. “He’s here?”

Harry saw Charlie point in his direction and Harry felt overwhelmed. Sure he was used to the stares and comments at this point, but he didn’t feel comfortable receiving that kind of attention at his friend’s funeral. As Anya walked over, Harry’s stomach turned.

“I’m sorry, it’s Harry, right?” She asked delicately.

“Uh, yeah.”

“Can I hold him?” Only then did Harry realize she was talking about Teddy.

“Oh, uh, of course.” Harry gingerly handed her the infant.

“He looks just like her.” Anya delicately dragged a finger along his face. “His name is Edward?”

“Yeah, but we call him Teddy.”

“Hi there, Teddy.” Anya sat down as she whispered to the baby. Charlie sat next to her. “Your mother was a very good friend of mine. She was a wonderful woman.” Harry noticed Anya was choking back tears, also noticing when Charlie began to rub her back to comfort her. Anya looked back at Harry, “You’re the godfather?”

“Erm, yes. His dad- Remus- was one of my dad’s best friends.”

“I’m so sorry for your loss.” Anya gave him a sad smile.

“You too.” was all Harry could bring himself to say without crying.

“Harry is Ginny’s boyfriend.” Charlie nudged Anya. “And Hermione over here,” only then did Harry realize how quiet she’d been, “is Ron’s girlfriend.” Hermione blushed scarlet upon the description.

“I’ve heard an awful lot about the two of you from Charlie and Bill.” Anya spoke to them but her eyes kept darting back to Teddy.

“Really?” Hermione said with a tone of surprise.

“Yeah, really?” Harry couldn’t help but blurt out. He’d only met Charlie a handful of times and was never too close with Bill either. It shocked him that either of them would mention him to a total stranger.

“Of course. It’s not everyday your siblings meet the Chosen One and the brightest witch of her age.” Charlie winked at the two. “Or get dragged into breaking about fifty school rules with them.”

“Don’t act like you didn’t break just as many rules back in our day.” Anya chided jokingly.

Harry raised an eyebrow. He knew Charlie had been a prefect, and pretty well-behaved from what he’d heard, aside from his dangerous fascination with magical creatures.

“At least I wasn’t Head Boy like Bill!” Charlie turned his attention back to Hermione and Harry. “This girl could’ve gotten us expelled more times than I can count.”

The lighter mood was broken when Teddy started to cry, reminding everyone of the gravity of their circumstances. Andromeda hurried over to take him off Anya’s hands, greeting her with a hug in the process.

“How are you, dear girl?”

“I’m well, Mrs. Tonks, thank you. Your grandson is absolutely beautiful.” Anya placed a light kiss on Teddy’s forehead before she handed him back to his grandmother.

“He keeps me young. Thankfully, I’ve got Harry to help out with him.” Andromeda had returned with a bottle of milk, which she placed in Teddy’s mouth.

“I can take him if you need to go back to the kitchen.” Hermione reached for the baby and Andromeda obliged.

“The food will be about twenty more minutes.” And hurried back.

“Rowan wanted to come but she wasn’t able to get back in time. She sends her regards.” Anya turned to Charlie. “Have you heard from the others?”

“Yeah, Barnaby was here earlier but he had to leave. The rest sent owls. I guess we’ll see them later this week.” Harry wondered what was happening later this week before realizing Charlie had gone to school with Tonks- and Tonks and Lupin’s joint funeral was that next Tuesday. He felt his stomach churn.

Anya carefully turned to Charlie. “Would you mind if I- if I went outside to- to say goodbye?” Charlie nodded and stood. “You don’t have to go with me, it’s fine-”

Charlie silently grabbed her hand and escorted her to the backyard. As he did, Ginny and Ron finally returned.

“Where are the two of them going? To snog?” Ron made his best attempt at a joke, realizing the actual situation when it was too late.

“So, Anya is her name?” Hermione asked, holding Teddy’s bottle. Ron nodded and she continued. “And she used to date Charlie? As in, they’re not together anymore?”

“It’s complicated.” Ginny sat back down next to Harry and rested her head on shoulder.

“Charlie doesn’t talk about it much, at least not with us. Bill probably knows loads more.” Ron absentmindedly rubbed Teddy’s tiny arm.

“It seems like they still love each other.” Ginny continued. “But they love their work too. And that puts them in different places a lot of the time. It’s hard to be together when you’re on opposite sides of the continent.”

“They graduated right before we started Hogwarts. So she went to school with Bill, Charlie, Percy, George, and… Fred.” Ron winced while saying his name. “We only know her from summer visits and all.”

“She seems… kind.” Hermione was careful not to move as Teddy had just fallen asleep.

“Yeah, she’s pretty alright.”

-

Dinner was served and Anya and Charlie made their way back inside. Their eyes were bloodshot but Anya tried to smile regardless.

“The food looks excellent, Molly.” Anya handed Charlie a plate before grabbing her own. “Oh, and I almost forgot!” Anya ran back to the living room where she’d dropped off her back, returning with a metal tin. “I made cookies. They’re called stroopwafels, they’re a Dutch cookie.”

Charlie immediately reached for a cookie, “God, I miss your baking.”

Anya smacked his hand away, “Eat your dinner first, you animal.”

“Keep him in check, Anya.” Molly squeezed her shoulder before continuing to dole out the plates.

“See? She agrees with me.”

“She’s my mum, of course she agrees with you.”

Charlie and Anya made their way over to Bill and Fleur, where Fleur and Anya entered deep conversation over Bill’s days in Hogwarts.

“I had the biggest crush on your husband when I was twelve years old!” Anya elbowed Bill in the ribs playfully.

“As long as you don’t ‘ave one now!” Fleur retorted.

“Ah no, I think I ended up liking someone else a whole lot more.” Anya shot a glance at Charlie who turned the same color as his hair.

They were interrupted by George, who cleared his throat and stood. Angelina and Lee, who’d been by his side most of the night, shushed the others.

“I don’t quite know what to say, but I know I’ve got to say something. My best friend is gone. And a part of me is missing.” George took a moment to breathe, while everyone in the room started to choke back tears. “Fred knew this was a possibility. We all did. But he fought because it was right. And I know he doesn’t regret it for a second. He’d hate to see us crying over him, but what else are we supposed to do when the light in the room is gone? I- we- have to take it one day at a time. But I want to toast him for now, I want to celebrate him. To Fred.” George raises his glass.

“To Fred.”

#hogwarts mystery #i changed the name of my mc for the sake of this bc my name is ugly #harry potter #charlie weasley #bill weasley #teddy lupin #fred weasley #george weasley #molly weasley #ron weasley #ginny weasley #hermione granger #andromeda tonks #fleur delacour

[assholemurphy]

holy fuck, god is real (well, i mean, obvs, but he’s been coming thru for me 90% of the time lately and today is one of those times).

so, not only was i able to go to class and get an idea for what i need to do for my full group project (that i have to finish myself, which is what we’re supposed to do), but i was completely apathetic and not even remotely anxious at all, even on two and a half hours of sleep (tho, i did get an hour nap before our company meeting), but i just checked canvas and holy fuck. my paper, that i thought i was going to have to write tonight in like, 2 hours (bc it’s due at midnight) even tho i haven’t slept and haven’t read enough analysis(es?) of the script (hedda gabler, which i read one act of an promptly decided that, nah, i learned the same shit from reading a summary, so it wasn’t worth it to read that much bullshit), and am too tired to even comprehend my own words, let alone a fucking play, is not actually due tonight. it’s due next monday. i can do it over fall break. that means i can fuck around for a little while tonight (even tho i’ve got a p big project, that’s already late, well, half of it is, the other half is due wed) and then get a decent amount of rest for once. i’m just- i got a zero on a big portion of my giant sa project and i missed my intro class today (bc i wanted and extra hour and a half of sleep) but everything else has gone great. absolutely grand, cats. i’ve got an extra week for the paper and i’m gonna get a full 8 hours tonight. i’m so fucking happy.

so, i’m beginning to think things are looking up for me. the tides, they are a turning, and these waters are getting less choppy. if things stay like this for a couple weeks, i should be able to fully get my shit together and start being on top of things. i think it’s gonna be okay, tho, i rly do. i’m gonna use fall break to write a kick ass paper (bc essays are my shit, i’m amazing at them, when i’m not dead tired and trying to write 5 pages in 2 hours, which i can do, but well, it wouldn’t be my best work at all, and i try to have some pride in my writing), get ahead on my acting I monologues, and get my entire life organized via planners, alarms, sticky notes, to do lists, and a binder. i’m gonna get my shit together (i keep repeating this bc every time i say it, i feel more confident that i can) and the rest of the semester isn’t going to be a constant struggle. i’m gonna be on top of shit. i’m going to show the theatre dept that i’m capable of kicking ass and that i’m deserving of respect. i’m going to get everything worked out and sorted and i’m gonna slowly work on my trauma and trusting ppl and being a nice person. i’m never gonna be normal, but i can be functional. i can be stable.

so, i think i’m gonna fuck around on tumblr for a while, maybe, possibly watch the rest of dp2, and then go tf to sleep, wake up rested, and maybe even do my makeup tomorrow. bc rafiki said i look good in earth tones, so i bought earth tones, and i’d like to try them out. like, he’s v honest, so i trust his opinion. he’s not just saying it to placate me. and i do want to be pretty. i want to look nice. and apparently wearing bright ass lipsticks that make me look like i’ve been dining on a box of crayolas scares ppl a bit. i’m a bit tired of scaring ppl, tbh. i just want to look nice and be able to be confident in myself without hiding behind outrageous makeup and clothes. and, if i’m lucky, i might not have to exist on caffeine and semi-legal drugs tomorrow. my friends are busy tonight, so they won’t be over, but i can get some sleep, so i’m okay with it. besides, i always feel like i bother them too much. like, i invite one or both of them over literally every night. literally. i think in the past three weeks i’ve had maybe 4 days where i didn’t spend time with at least one of the victory bros. i mean, if i was bothering them, they’d probs just not come over, but i always worry that i’m too needy and they just come bc they think i’m fragile or some shit and wouldn’t be able to handle being told ‘no.’ i need to talk to them abt it and have them be honest with me (tho, they generally are honest, even when i wish they wouldn’t be) so ik for sure. i’m scared the answer will be ‘yeah, stop bothering us daily, it’s annoying’ but if it it, it is and i’ll deal with it. 

anyway, i’m gonna fuck around, maybe update my planner a bit for the week while i watch dp2, but then i’m going tf to bed. i’ve recently discovered something. if i sleep in my hoodie, then i feel safer, warmer, and more comfortable and therefore feel more rested when i wake up. so, guess who’s sleeping in a hoodie from now on? this bitch. it worked last winter, it seems to be working now, and i’m just gonna keep doing it until it stops working. tho, i do need to wash the hoodie. i could do that tonight, but that’ll take a couple of hours, so i might just wait until tomorrow, since i’ll have hw and therefore will be awake, anyway. if i have enough quarters. i might have to get goldilocks to take me to the laundromat, since they have a change machine and the washers are better than the ones at the apartments, and cheaper. idk, yet.

but, i’mma stop rambling now, i think. i highly doubt any of you cats actually read these long ass bullshit posts, but they make me feel better to write up, so i’mma continue with them. it makes my head quieter to get the words out.

oh! i plan to get the next chap of tal written (or, at least partially written, tho i’m shooting to finish it) during the break, too, so if i’m lucky and don’t just sleep for 4 days straight, it might actually get posted before next mon. fingers crossed.

#iz says stuff #god i'm long winded #concise is my antonym #but i'm trying to remember to tag these a 'long post' #so ppl who don't want to see huge blocks of text don't have to #i'd put it under a read more #but i fucking hate read mores so fucking much #like you don't even know how much i hate them #i'll use them for fics #but i try to avoid using them otherwise bc i just don't like them #it's just a lot of extra effort to read a post that's been read mored and i like to pretend that ppl do read this shit #so ya know #lmk if you /would/ prefer me to use read mores #bc if enough of you want me to #i will #long post

[wannawrite]

All You Would Ever Be

Wanna One's Kang Daniel X Reader [ fem ver ] Fluff bullet point ver. wanna one masterlist produce 101 masterlist • you, Seongwoo and Daniel are the Trio™, a sub unit from your actual clique of like idk a lot of friends ??? there are different units like jinhwi • Jinyoung isn't the only one in his unit who has fallen for someone else. You have too • and Seongwoo is going to get you together hello, @collecting-smiley-taehyung  welcome to your scenario okay i need to stop it's the stress of exams, really anyways, I hope you like your scenario and THANK YOU FOR SUPPORTING US SO OPENLY IM IN TEARS 💕 thanks for the request beb. hope you don't mind I did it in bulletpoint style, I'm working on requests in the midst of exams so my scenarios aren't the best right now 😭 maybe scenario ver ? but that will take me a longer time - Admin L 

• okay • so • you are Daniel and Seongwoo's best friend • like best best best friend out of the people in the 101 clique™ • since there are so many people, subunits are bound to form and Ongniel has their own Ongniel is science!™ but • you + Ongniel = Trio™ • Daehwi + Jinyoung = Jinhwi™ • Woojin + Jihoon + Sungwoon = pink sausages™ • Taehyun + Kenta + Hyunbin + Sanggyun + Donghan + Longguo + Taedong = JBJ • but the 101 clique members loves and supports each other regardless of the number of subunits that formed • anyways • everyone is super close and loving it isn't rare for people to fall in love • Taehyun fell for Daehwi but otter is in love with Sungwoon • sometimes its messy but that's okay • but for you • it's REALLY messy • you like Daniel • simple right? • but Daniel is your best friend and literally, you've known him all your life • he treats you like his little sister • and as much as you love him, you don't want that • you want to be his girlfriend • luckily, you're amazing at suppressing feelings • like you went to a haunted house with the W1 unit™ and didn't scream the whole time but Jisung ended up crying • later though, you collapsed on the floor and screamed your lungs out • delayed reaction basically • but no • conceal, don't feel • don't let Daniel know • it's hard work because you two grew up together and still live in the same neighbourhood so naturally • wherever you go • there's a Kang Daniel • supermarket? • he's there buying eggs for his mother • gas station? • he's there sending his uncle's car for washing • the park? • he's there jogging in a thin tank top that makes your eyes pop out • and your heart explodes • he should have found out by now but you pray that daniel's oblivious • jokes • he's known you all your life he knows everything about you • like how your ears turn red before your face does • or how you hide under your blankets • how you under the bed when it's storming • how you stole one of Daniel's cats once • he didn't know for a good hour or so • you just took the nearest cat and ran so you weren't exactly sure what its name was • ring ring • 'hello?' • 'y/n, did you take Peter?' • 'who tf is Peter? idk them? no? I just left your house wdym' • 'bye felicia i'm on my way to yours' • yeah but that's a story for another time • Daniel is like a part of your family man • your parents adore him so much and bonus! they're super super close with Kang family • your mother was best friends with his mum in college it's cute • you and Daniel spend time around each other's houses so much you leave a bag of your things there and vice versa • lately, Ong has become so close to both of you, he's there too • oh my god • Seongwoo knows everything • e v e r y t h i n g • no one even told him ??? how did does he find out • so Seongwoo kind of becomes the middleman • wingman • since he knows that you are practically in love with Daniel you might as well rant your ass off to him • 3 am Facetime with him bc you want to talk about how handsome Daniel looked today • Seongwoo is surprisingly a good listener and offers advice sometimes • 'i just want to kiss him! ugh!' • 'uh-huh. me too sis.' - Ong Seongwoo, about Kang Daniel,2017 • little do you know • Daniel calls Seongwoo for exactly the same things • he whines about how adorable you are to Ong for hours • honestly it's driving Ong madddd • he just wants ya'll to get together • partially because it'll be super frickin' cute • partially because you two would stop whining to him • also partially because the 101 clique would expand its number of couples • imagine the amount of • 'i'm a man but my heart is pounding' • instances • many indeed and everyone is happy :") • so one day • Ongniel is over at your house and Daniel goes downstairs to grab another packet of jellies for your movie night and Ong just • 'yo Y/N, Daniel likes you too' while stuffing a handful of popcorn into his mouth • you nearly choke on your soda • Ong doesn't help you but smirks when you stare at him in disbelief • he nods in confirmation when you ask • 'omgomgomgomgomg' • 'AOMG' stan AOMG • now the two of you conspire to form a plan to confess, Daniel has absolutely no clue • during the movie, you just casually lounge your head on his shoulder • in his lap • sometimes your legs intertwine with his • then again, this isn't anything unusual because you guys are too close man it's hard • and Daniel seems to be keeping a straight face :( • you are sad • maybe he doesn't like me anymore ??? • nah sis you thought • Daniel's sweating so badly and his insides have turned to mush • what is a normal, regular heart rate? he swears he needs to be sent into the ER asap • basically, Daniel dies every single time you're around him • he's trying so hard to hide his feelings it hurts • Ong is abt to give up • you tell Ong your worries abt confessing • 'what if he never speaks to me again!' • 'idw to break our friendship' • '(ง •̀_•́)ง' • 'if Daniel rejects you, he can fite me' • your other best friend rubs your shoulder encouragingly, smiling • 'don't worry, Daniel whines about you a lot. he definitely likes you too. go for it, Y/N' • 'how long has he stayed on the phone talking about me?' • 'hmmm, the record was 4 hours just talking about how cute you looked with your new hair' • get you a man who hypes you like that • the whole 101 squad pretty much knows you two are in love with each other • but no one actl wants to tell ??? you ??? two ??? • okay sis • but this carries on for about a month before you suck it up and decide to tell Daniel • Ong is like • 'YASS' • he's running and jumping around your living room throwing glitter and rejoicing • next thing you know, Jisung is on the phone and Ong is screaming the details at him • yeah • so Ong schedules really cute day for you to get pampered. • spa day. get your nails done etc etc • he even books a table at some fancy restaurant even though he knows you two might get kicked out • but he hopes you two will control yourselves because it's a date and not a 'hang out' • he tells Daniel he set up a blind date for him • Daniel is like 'hell no, why?' • Seongwoo just smiles and pushes him more • so he ends up getting all dressed up and makes sure to steal Ong's credit card • you're slipping on your cute kitten heels and freaking out while Ong and Jisung try to fan your face so your makeup doesn't melt off • 'I spent two hours on that face, don't mess it up!' - Sungwoon, about your makeup, 2017 • Seongwoo drives you down to the venue and escorts you to that restaurant • Daniel is late lol • you face the other way so he doesn't see your face when he walks in • he's flustered asf, apologies spilling out of his mouth • silently curses in fear he messed up when you still won't face him • you look familiar ?? then again, he's never seen you so dressed up • Ong went all out and booked a table at the most prestigious restaurant in the city • 'My name is-' • 'Kang Daniel.' • his jaw drops open when you finally speak and turn to face him • hE'S LIKE SODISOHXIS SEONGWOO • 'oh my god. y/n? did Ong trick you into something?' • you shake your head and smile, reaching over the table and grabbing his hand • here goes nothing • 'Daniel, I want to date you.' • woAH DANIEL LOOKS LIKE THE HEAVENS HAVE OPENED AND AN ANGEL HAS COME DOWN TO B L E S S HIM • he's a blushing mess and stammers out the first few words which makes you giggle • there's this satisfied, boyish grin on his face and he dreamily says • 'okay sure' • for the duration of the whole meal, there's skinship • hands touching in between bites, your heels meet his Louboutin's and he promises to buy you a pair someday • ya'll cute • you realise how much you love him, there's so much conversation and you realise you're in love with such a wholesome, real man • :") • at the end of your dinner, Daniel drives you home in the car you've been in a hundred times • but it's the first time as his girlfriend • and it feels different • he admits to liking you for a long time now which makes you blush • he walks you to your door as usual but unlike the normal goodnight hugs he gives you • you lean in and peck his lips, thanking him for the date even though you initiated it • Daniel drives home with the silliest, dreamiest look on his face • Ong and 2Sung are celebrating and he's lowkey sad he'll be third-wheeling in the trio • but that's okay bc he loves you both and wants ya'll to marry • you guys actl do • besides, he'll have his hands full working on how to get 2Sung together

#wanna one #wanna one scenarios #produce 101 #produce 101 scenarios #kang daniel #ong seongwoo #yoon jisung #hwang minhyun #lee daehwi #ha sungwoon #park woojin #park jihoon #lai guanlin #bae jinyoung #kim jaehwan

[hycrans]

( the cuteST )

a bitch is Tired rn after pulling my usual shit, aka staying up until 5am for no reason only to wake up three hours later to watch bts run, so excuse the seeming lack of enthusiasm lkfdsjglk. hey i’m jules, i’m 20, canadian, and my current means of life rn are chocolate, the x files ( iM LATE IK SFGDJLK ) and 3am you in me listening parties with myself rip !! it’s been almost a month since its release, i need to Relax dammit. i’m a uni student who just got off for christmas break and in love with sowoo so you don’t wanna know the agony that came with picking one over the other without a bit of help. you can hmu on d*scord at HAPPY S*OKJIN DAY#2030 ( don’t.. call me out for not having an updated name since his birthday’s passed, i’m not v bright pls ) if you’d like and this is so boRING, it’s like the life is sucked out of me omg. anyways hyeran, a whole.. other positive muse bc jesus, how many of these do i have rn ?? this is so out of hand man, but nonetheless here’s a bit abt the brat:

- ̗̀ JEON SOMIN, CISFEMALE, SHE/HER ̖́- – have you seen YUN HYERAN? people’ve said the TWENTY TWO year old has been running around the streets of jeju lately, which is odd because aren’t they a BARISTA/MUSIC PRODUCER during the day? anyways, i know they’re known to be EBULLIENT and TRANQUIL but recently i’ve heard they’ve been MAGNANIMOUS and DIFFIDENT, but i could be wrong. ( jules / 20 / gmt-3:30 / she/her )

EDIT: i somehow forgot to mention that she’s.. not sure where she is on the lgbt spectrum but she knows she’s Not Straight JFGDSLKJGK but she’s panromantic so yeah sgjkdl. i’m a whole mess today, i’m sorry lol

yun hyeran, a daegu native with an older and younger brother, an ambivert and an all around baby

tbh i don’t have much of her bg figured out, that’s always the last thing i get to so rip

buT she became involved in music through her father, who studied it in uni and ended up becoming a music instructor with a focus on piano, flute and vocals

her and her mom.. also her older brother, didn’t have the best relationship when she grew older, which seemed to die altogether when her parents divorced and her mom left. but her and her brother’s still exists, it’s just that he’s a bit of a toxic influence on her and she tends to distance herself from him

went to uni in seoul to pursue music like her father ( a daddy’s girl too like ) and found her way into the world of production !! by junior year, she’d transferred out of her original program and majored in that instead and has loved it ever since; she recently graduated

moved to jeju island bc an aunt lived there when she was young and she LOVED to visit, made a few friends there and would always whine abt the next time they could all go see her aunt again. so it made sense for her to live, at least for a little while, in one of her favourite places

she also adores said aunt, her dad’s sister and the maternal figure she Deserves, so she came partially to see her more often

for the time being, she works full-time as a barista at the café just a block from her cute little studio apartment while looking into internships at record labels for her to take on a little further down the line ( no rush bc it’s already quite competitive and she’d rather enjoy what she has going now )

she’s also making something of an income as the creator of an acct on youtube and soundcloud for her music, something she’s had for abt two years now

she’s not even close to making it big yet, and she doesn’t mind if she never works for a moderately to highly popular label — though she should if she wants to get by

among the aesthetic, lo-fi music crowd ( one of those yt accts with a livestream for certain playlists that go on for hours, rip ) where for the most part, it’s personal faves mixed with her own works, and has a substantial following as of now. but has an interest in experimenting, with mashups ( as a lover of them ?? i couldn’t help myself sgflkdsjg ) for example, with a small fear of how that change would be received

this is so short iK, it’s a little infuriating if you ask me ljkgdfjls

in terms of her personality and other things:

she’s a very loyal person, v e r y. while like i said, her relationship with her brother is Not Great, she hasn’t completely given up on him. maybe for the time being, but her being someone who’s open to the idea of people changing for the better somewhere down the line, leaves a bit of room for her to possibly change her mind if he does enough to allow her to consider it

so she can be a bit of a doormat in some cases, it all depends on how she sees the person that determines if that’s the case, but she generally won’t let you off if you’re being dumb/an ass to someone or if she gets advantageous vibes from you for example ( given she can.. be a little naive and is a p gentle soul ) so.. idk fgklsj good luck to the 99% ig ??

she does have a slight dependency on others despite her thinking all signs point to the opposite, and even though her and her mom never rly had a good relationship she still reels from the neglect/abandonment some days so handle her with Care if she deems you a close pal, 

spontaneous tbh, moving to jeju was a little last minute on her part, for one

she’s a little reclusive when focused on something, if she tells you she’s working on a track, it’s essentially a head’s up that you might not see her for a couple of days depending on how soon she gets it done — lowkey that bitch™ who makes up an illness to her boss, so she wouldn’t even show up for work if it’s more than just her fucking around

bc admittedly, a lot of what she posts is fucking around and liking it, her more thought-out and effort packed projects are hidden away on her laptop

a bit insecure with her work and just her general disposition ?? those first few points above mess with her a lot and leave her disheartened so.. my poor child

v strong overall, takes people’s shit and if it gets to her, she gets over it p fast. doesn’t dwell on much and will be courteous to you even if she’s declared you too toxic to stick around 24/7

isn’t exactly one to get angry ?? she’s basically just disappointed or annoyed at best 99% of the time, it takes a lot to get her beyond that

positive, ugh. maybe not sickeningly sweet, but still. kinda explained parts of it above and i’m 95% gone mentally rn, gotta spare that for other little details gsjklf

a cute bean who wants the best for everyone and is also clumsy as absolute fuCK

uhhh

plays piano and bass guitar ( you don’t know how tempted i was to say clarinet bc of jiwoo gjflkgds )

prob had some kind of little amateur rock band with a few music majors and took up bass for the hell of it lmao

loves animals, leans towards cats or big dogs. corgis and those little spaniels get a pass tho

speaking of, she has a cute little calico kitten ( i’m shit with pet names so that’s tba rgkjls ) who she Loves, her baby !!

sweater, ball cap and basic t shirt junkie

those glasses somin’s been wearing a lot of lately ?? hyeran wears them too but.. actually needs them, not even close to a fashion statement

doesn’t don much makeup unless someone’s dragging her to a party or something

thaT’S when she looks a little more like a classy early twenties bitch.. which lbr, is hard enough when adulthood is a whole Train Wreck for the most part LGFJSDL

not a heavy drinker, but the textbook definition of a lightweight so.. she’s always praying for anyone who has to deal with her dgfjklsfg

lattes are her livelihood

a bit of a hopeless romantic, god help her

her favourite subject in school was literature/writing and reads quite a bit on her breaks at the café

favourite music genres.. it’s easier to say what she doesn’t like/finds boring, which is prob country and some aspects of edm/pop, not into punk/metal either

these are super basic but.. i’ve gotta get myself together for the day so this’ll do for now i hope ??

so if you’d like to plot, im me here or on d*scord ! i prefer the latter personally, but whichever’s easiest for you. i have a list of a few of the specific wcs i have in mind ( for the time being, catch my lazy ass avoid listing all the basic ones and revising a few i have on an old blog ) for hyeran up now, which you can find here, so just lmk if any of them appeal to you !!

#╳┊: — bitch you’re gonna die ! •「 ooc. 」 #islandintro #so uh yeah #this is messy GKFLDSJDG i apologize #at this point i might just add those additional long plots in the form of an ooc bc formatting on a page?? a Pain #.. basically too lazy for my own good rip