#and yet here I am a few years later still in uni

[kaitaiga]

I’m starting to think university isn’t for me

#I never wanted to go in the first place #I was just gonna leave high school and join the navy #and yet here I am a few years later still in uni #I should’ve graduated by now #but I can never commit to a degree #and it makes me sad everyday #like I’m just going for my mother at this point #very close to reopening my application #it’s like I’m sitting around waiting for something to happen #I should be at uni today but I can’t bring myself #I worry for my family everyday #aduh pusing

[sherewrytes]

T. A. R (Time, Appreciation, Respect)

(I'll always want you part 2)

Synopsis: Ony was calling Y/N constantly these days, trying to always reach out to talk and say his piece. Y/N wasn't sure if she was ready for it.

C.W. Angst, Black coded reader, Drug use (weed). Song links used as reference.

Fanfic inspired by the following song.

Solange: Cranes in the sky

Link for part one here

Time had passed since your confrontation with Ony on that fateful night. The sting of betrayal still lingered, casting a shadow over your every thought and action. You still find herself unable to shake the memories of everything that took place between you and Ony and the raw emotions it had unleashed.

It's 2:30 AM. You lie awake, replaying the conversation with Ony in your mind. A part of you acknowledges he may be right, yet you find it impossible to converse without being overwhelmed by emotions.

You heard Annie out on her part to play in all this but not Ony. You didn't have class until 2pm today so you had enough time to sleep some more if needed. You got out of bed, stretched, went to your desk to journal to clear your mind.

You lit the candle on your desk, opened your journal and poured your feelings into it. The pen felt heavy in your hand, similar to how your heart felt in your chest. You wrote about the confusion swirling within you, torn between the logic of Ony's words and the ache of betrayal that still lingered deep within your soul. Memories flashed through your mind of happier times, of sad times and every moment in between. You knew you should hear him out but, you couldn't decide if you were ready or not.

You closed the journal and texted Sasha to see if she was awake. You needed someone to talk to. Sasha responded almost immediately saying she's in the area, so she'd be over in a few and she has Connie and Eren with her.

You sighed and responded. You went to your kitchen to make a quick midnight snack for you and your quests. 15 mins later, at your apartment is Sasha, Connie and Eren.

Connie: "Is it okay if I smoke in here. Between Uni, my music shit and other shit. I'm stressed out."

You: "It's cool. I do smoke sometimes, well used to with Ony. Speaking of Ony. He's been calling my phone nonstop.

*Turns to Eren* He said you've been on his ass about me. Eren the fuck you on boy.

Eren sighed "Look I'm just looking out for him. Ony is taking this harder that I've seen him take anything. Him and I go way back. Ony only shows up to class, messages me for some weed well hella weed. He aint even in the studio much either."

You knew Eren, Connie, Mikasa and Ony were music majors at Paradis University which you all attended. Eren was the lowkey producer type that makes beats to rival the greats. Connie is a rising hip hop artist and Ony is a cross between Trap Soul and Rap. Mikasa was the soulful girl with a beautiful voice. You knew Ony never missed studio time for nothing, so you knew he was struggling.

"When last did he show up." Y/N asked Eren with some concern in her tone.

"Probably 2 months ago before that it was 3 months before that. Look you don't have to force yourself to talk to him or bear his wounds or help him heal from the mess he made on his own. It ain't your job to, What I'm asking is if you can hear him out even if its 5 minutes if you can't then Imma tell him to drop it."

You sat in silence for a bit truly wondering what to do, so you turned to Sasha. "Honestly I want to hear him out, I do but I need more time. I know everyone thinks I forgave Annie so easy, but Ony and I had something deeper than Annie and I had even with our years of friendship. Ya we were fighting and at odds that time but..I know I'm being dumb cause Annie is just as responsible as he was. I just need to clear my head some more."

Connie took a toke of his joint and passed it to Eren then Eren to Sasha. Sasha pulled out her phone and connected it to the speakers in your apartment and started playing L.E.S by Childish Gambino. They all passed the joint around the room you took a few hits here and there. Eren was mindlessly scrolling through his IG to see Ony posted a 15 sec video on IG with a link in the caption to his YouTube to his latest track Amphetamine.

Eren blurted out with a bit of shock, "What the fuck, Ony just dropped a new song. It looks like he changed his artist's name from Ony to Soro. I mean he mentioned the change last time he came in the studio. Yo Sasha disconnect real quick lemme listen to this real quick."

Sasha disconnected her phone to allow Eren to pull up the track. " The song is almost 8 mins WTF is Ony on" Eren says.

The beat kicks in with this smooth, laid-back vibe that immediately hooks you in. Everyone's silent giving the track a listen.

" It's like an amphetamine, how it marinate on my mind (stuck on me, yah) Got no doubt I'll be alright, if I just make it through the night."

You can hear, almost feel the range of emotions in the song. You can hear Ony's voice pouring out his feelings. The beat changes around 2:48 seconds in giving a whole different vibe to the song.

"Shawty cold as December, I still fold her, no Manila B-b-b-brr wit me baby, I hibernate, smoke the lettuce."

Everyone was vibing with the song until they heard Mikasa's voice drop on the track around 4:28 Everyone a bit surprised since Mikasa doesn't easily do features even if it's with her friends. Connie laughed a bit "He got Mikasa on this with him. Damn he really went all out. Aye Eren aint this the same beat he said he didn't want around 5 maybe 6 months ago?" Eren laughed thinking back to when he played this beat for Ony, and he said he hated it. Ony owed him big time for this, but he'll circle back to it. As the song finished. You sat with your eyes full of tears. You thought to yourself that you could feel every emotion Ony sang about in the song. The loss of their relationship, his struggles with his mental health and so much more.

Connie was the first the chime in when the song ended "Damn that was.... deep." "Yah it was Ony really flipped the script on this one." Eren chimed in.

Eren got a notification that Ony was live on IG. He clicked on it. He saw he was talking about his just dropped song and other usual shit that's going on in his life.

Ony's eyes were the newfound usual shade of slight bloodshot red from smoking and hardly any sleep. He was reading off a comment asking him who inspired him to write the song. he responded with "Someone but also no one."

Ony's voice flowed through the speakers in your apartment causing Eren to disconnect his phone to watch the live a bit easier.

He commented saying "Fire track man, wish you'd let me know you were droppin a song man."

Ony read the comment out loud and smirked and said "Sorry man. I wanted it to be a personal project, but I owe you one big time for the beat."

Ony and Eren were engaging in their usual banter in the comments of Ony's Instagram live. You were deep in thought when Ony read aloud a comment from someone claiming his song was inspired by his ex-girlfriend. Ony and you had a semi-public relationship, which is due to his rising fame as a Trap Soul/rap artist.

Ony sighed, his mind drifting back to the last time he saw you in person, when you came to return his belongings from your place. He had seen you around campus since then, but it simply wasn't the same. His response was "It was inspired by pain. Pain of loss, loss of love, loss of hopes, loss of dreams. Loss of self. She's part of something I lost in my life."

Ony paused, his gaze drifting off as he recalled the bittersweet memories. He took a deep breath, trying to push away the ache in his chest as he continued, his voice laden with emotion. "So yeah, she's part of what I lost, but 'Amphetamine' is also about finding myself again. It's about reclaiming my voice, my truth, and pouring it all out into my music."

A faint smile tugged at the corners of his lips, though sadness lingered in his eyes. "Maybe one day she'll hear this song and understand. Understand that she's not just a memory, but a muse who ignited something within me, something I'll carry with me forever."

With that, Ony concluded, the weight of his words hanging heavy in the air. The live disconnected indicating he ended it abruptly.

As the live session ends abruptly, the room falls into a heavy silence. You, sits with a mix of emotions swirling within yourself. Ony's words echo in your mind, resonating deeply with your own conflicted feelings. You can't shake the sense of nostalgia and longing that his music and words evoke. Sasha breaks the silence, her voice soft yet determined. "Y/N, are you okay?" she asks, her concern evident.

You took a moment to collect your thoughts before responding. "I don't know, Sasha," you admit, your voice barely above a whisper.

Sasha nods understandingly, her eyes reflecting empathy. "I get it. It's hard to hear someone express their pain so openly, especially when it's intertwined with your own." Eren chimes in, his tone reflective. "Yeah, but maybe that's what he needs right now. It's better than him bottling it up and tryna smoke it all away."

Connie exhales a puff of smoke, his expression contemplative. "True, but it's also a lot to unpack. Y/N, you don't have to rush into anything. Take your time to process everything, to figure out what you need and want. What Ony did was messed up"

You nod, grateful for your friends' support. "Thanks, guys. I think…I think I need some time alone to sort through my thoughts."

With that que, Eren, Sasha and Connie left your apartment. you walk through your apartment heading to your room, the melody of Ony's song still echoing in your mind. Your emotions even more confusing than when you talked to Ony earlier. You looked at the time. It was almost 5 am. You decided to shower and head back to bed, hoping to get some rest before class.

Your mind was restless, torn between Ony's latest track and his words during the IG live, you were conflicted. On one hand, you acknowledged missing him, but on the other, infidelity was something you could never condone in a relationship. You recognized a desire to listen to his explanation, yet you feared your heart might not endure his version of the events.

The weight of Ony's words hangs heavy in the air, suffocating your mind with intense thoughts. Alone amidst the dim glow of your bedside lamp, the words "Maybe one day she'll hear this song and understand." taunt you with the possibility of reconciliation and closure. You thought to yourself "How could I ever hope to understand the depths of his pain when my own wounds still bleed with the memory of his betrayal?"

Finally entering your room, you sink onto the edge of the bed, burying your face in trembling hands, desperate to silence the cacophony of thoughts threatening to consume you.

"Take your time to process everything, to figure out what you need and want." Connie's words echo faintly in her mind. With a trembling sigh, you rise from the bed, your steps faltering as you make your way to the bathroom. The steady stream of water cascades over your trembling form, washing away the tears that stain your cheeks.

"It's 5 am. I should try to get some rest before class," you think to yourself. Climbing out of the shower, your limbs feel heavy. Wrapping yourself in a towel, the fabric offers a feeble shield against the lingering chill. You dress slowly, abandoning your usual routine for the simple comfort of bed, seeking to calm your mind. Eventually, you drift into sleep, the confusion in your heart, perhaps even greater than before.

*Slight Time Skip*

You finished up her class for the evening, your Textile Science class drained your mind. you run into Eren, Connie, Armin and Pieck in the courtyard chattin it up.

"Yo, Y/N!" Armin hollered, his grin wide as he motioned for her to come over. You gave a small nod, casually strolling over as they kept chattin'. It helped take your mind off things for a sec.

"So, y'all ready for tonight?" Armin asked, his eyes sparklin' with excitement. "Tonight?" you echoed, feeling a bit lost.

Armin leaned in closer, speakin' low like it was a secret. "The party, It's goin' down at my place. everybody's rolling through." You thought about if Ony was gonna be there since going Armin's parties was one of their go to things as a couple.

You shifted uncomfortably, tryna come up with an excuse to bail but before you could say anythin', Sasha and Mikasa slid through, bringin' a burst of energy to the scene. "Hey, y'all!" Sasha greeted; her smile infectious as she pulled you into a hug.

Mikasa gave a nod, her expression serious as she peeped Y/N with concern.

"Y/N, you gotta come through tonight," Pieck chimed in, her voice smooth and persuasive. "You never show up to the parties, and it's gonna be lit." Y/N hesitated, caught between the comfort of being alone and the fear of missing out on the squad's vibe.

Just then, Ony strolled past, casting a shadow over Y/N's mood. She felt a surge of anger bubbling up inside, memories of their messy situation flooding back.

Armin, clueless as ever, turned to Ony with a hopeful grin. "Yo, you coming tonight, Ony?"

Ony glanced at you for a sec before turning back to Armin, his face unreadable. But before he could answer, you spoke up with fire in your voice. "I ain't showing if he's gonna be there," you stated, pointing your finger at Ony with a fierce look.

The air got heavy; the tension thick enough to cut with a knife. Y/N's heart raced as she waited for Ony's response. But instead of coming back at you, Ony just nodded quietly, his eyes holding a hint of regret before he dipped out.

You caught the concerned glances of your friends. You knew your emotions were a bit confusing being torn between wanting to hear him out, missing him then not wanting to be around him. Even though almost much time had passed, her emotions still felt raw.

You looked around to your friend group who was gauging your reaction to seeing Ony. Each stare, felt like a trap a push to make a decision you weren't ready for.

"I can't do this," you muttered, your voice barely above a whisper as you took a step back, your eyes darting between your friends and a mental escape route. Sasha's hand on your arm stopped you in your tracks, her grip firm yet gentle. "You can't run from this forever, Y/N, you're gonna have to address this or find the will to move on" she said softly, her eyes reflecting a depth of understanding. You stared at Sasha's face trying to gauge her facial expression and reaction "I know, Sash I know." you whispered hoarsely, your voice cracking with emotion. "But I'm not ready to face him, not yet. I don't know if I ever will be."

With that said you turned and left them there, briskly walking back to catch an uber back to your apartment.

----------------------------While you left-----------------------------------

Eren stared at Armin, scoffing with annoyance "Bro, how you gonna forget they ain't together no more? Ony straight up did her dirty with Annie."

Armin sighed and took a step back. "I know but they're both my friends and I want them both to be happy and come out more. guess I messed up by asking them out around each other. It's just that we hardly get to chill with both of them around, you know...it's tough."

Eren shook his head, his frustration evident in his furrowed brow. "I get that, Armin, but you gotta realize it's not just about them being happy. Ony really hurt Y/N, man. And seeing him around just brings back all that pain."

Armin's shoulders slumped in defeat, his expression reflecting the weight of his guilt. "I know, Eren, I know," he muttered, running a hand through his hair in frustration. "I just... I don't know how to fix this mess."

Sasha, who had been listening quietly, spoke up with a sympathetic tone. "Maybe there's no quick fix, Armin. Sometimes all we can do is give them space and time to heal, you know?"

Connie nodded in agreement, his expression serious. "Yeah, sometimes the best thing we can do is just be there for them when they're ready to talk or when they need us."

Armin sighed; his gaze heavy with regret. "You're right," he admitted, a sense of resignation settling over him. "I just hope they both find their way through this, somehow."

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#aot angst #aot onyankopon #onyankopon x reader #onyankopon x black y/n #ony x black reader #ony aot #aot x black reader #aot x you #aot x reader #black reader #black tumblr #sherewrytes #connie springer #sasha blouse #eren yeager #eren jaeger

[onlyjaeyun]

i’ve been following ur writing for some time now and i do have to agree with that anon who said you did CH dirty. you are a very talented writer so it’s just hard to watch.

you started off CH so strong with the lore and little chapters here and there but as it progressed you kind of just got lazy and it shows. when important events happened in the story, they weren’t conveyed through writing but through the texts (ie the riki and yn fight, that was definitely worth a written chapter) and it was honestly disappointing.

the ending isn’t much to say about either. yn and hoon barely go through development after the letter incident and all of a sudden they’re dating and married with a kid like two chapters later?

idk, if it was a mental health issue then i get that but even then you should’ve just gave it a break and thought everything out more. you could do so much better.

thank you for the feedback!

i wanna put you through the progess of a piece of writing from the POV of a writer okay? now keep in mind: i work two jobs, am a fulltime uni student and the daughter of an immigrant household with two parents who still work most of the day just so you know what else i have to deal with, besides my mental health okay?

now, i started off CH strong right? yes. i uploaded on the daily, fine i chose that. a chapter usually takes me around one hour if i actually sit down and focus on nothing but the chapter itself, which includes IG stories, editing, formatting etc. alright

on top of the daily chapters, i constantly replied to 40+ asks a day, a blessing in disguise because no matter how much i enjoy talking to you guys, the pressure does get worse the bigger that number of my inbox becomes, i hope this makes sense

now, i started CH back in october, right when my semester started, thats why i started off strong but as time went on, my assignments and private life got too busy and i guess i felt entitled enough as a writer to skip a few certain chaps and make life a little easier for me by making them regular chapters instead of written ones.

and this is gonna be my main point: i'm not a machine. i wrote a minimum of 5 THOUSAND words per written chapter, MINIMUM. we're talking about a 5-9 THOUSANDED worded chapter EACH WEEK. which usually took me about 6-7 hours, even allnighters.

yes, i chose to do that and maybe my time management wasn't the best but i had to create a compromise where i wouldnt have let you guys wait for over two months which would have resulted in me losing my motivation completely, and yet still focusing on EXAMS. because you know, i'm a fulltime uni student with TWO jobs 😮‍💨

if YOU think i did CH dirty go write an alternative ending yourself but it should be a minimum of 15 chapters including 5 written ones, with at LEAST 9k words each yeah? i wanna see you manage it all, pls prove me wrong snd show me you're better than me i'm genuinely begging bc it might inspire me to do "better" next time.

as a writer/artist/creator, and i can tell you probably arent one yourself or havent been one for long, the longer smth takes to come to an end the worse the pressure becomes which results in a blockage i dont wish upon my worst enemy i'm being deadass. i dealt with some of the worst writer's block ive had since i started writing literally 12 years ago and you're telling me i should have just "taken a break" and do "better"

i never, ever expected anything from anyone but some of you are so entitled to a writer's time and skill it's giving me a headache. maybe you didn't like the timing and writing of the last few chapters of CH and i guess that's unfortunate but this was so unnecessary because you completely dismissed everything else that could have been going on in my life and even belittled my mental health issues like im some fucking AI writing machine

do better, be nicer, write it yourself if you don't like it i'm so fucking over this

if i had gotten out of my own comfort and wellbeing and have actually written another set of written chapters i would have burned myself completely out. ive been in this fandom for not even a year and have already finished FOUR smaus with 50 chapters each, you do NOT get to tell me what i should or could have done better because you dont even give a fuck about me as a person this is just about receiving what YOU think YOURE entitled to but this is MY art and I will do what I see fit even if it's not what was expected of it because i'm a fucking human being with a life before i'm a writer on tumblr

oh, also: i do this for free ㅤ:) just a reminder :) this is my HOBBY :)

and don't you EVER call me lazy again when it comes to writing because i'm not gonna pour my heart and soul into a fic just for you to call me lazy when i literally wrote 50 THOUSAND words for this fucking fic just for the written chapters

goodbye

#; mailbox 📬 #; cold hearts

[tomtenadia]

Serve you my heart

Here I am with a silly fic based on the following prompt:

thegreyj asked: 

Fenrys giving Rowan advice on how to start a conversation with someone he likes

Fen: "Ask her something, get to know her!"

Ro: "Like what?"

Fen: "Ask her if she likes books."

Later Rowan tries to follow the advice. Only he ends up staring at Aelin for a minute before just blurting out "Books."

@rowaelinprompts

When I saw it I knew I had to write something with it. I wrote this in an hour. it's a quick 1.4k word fic and I hope you like it.

It has an awkward Rowan who has a crush on Aelin and yes... I love a flustered bird boy.

The title is silly and as you know I am bad at it but since it has a mention of volleyball (a sport I love with all my heart) I tried to play with words.

Enjoy

-----

Rowan felt like a teenager. He was in his thirty but when Aelin Galathynius was around his brain just stopped working. He would just turn into a blubbering idiot and would quickly walk away to avoid passing for an idiot. By now she probably thought that he hated her.

He worked in a high school as biology teacher. Aelin was the new English teacher and she was the sun in his dreary life. Her hair blonde like the sun, her eyes a gorgeous blue with a ring of gold. And her curves. Rowan had to force himself not to think about her body or he would just combust on the spot. Surely it was not proper having such thoughts about a colleague, but he could not deny that he was interested in her. Speaking to his other colleagues he had heard nothing but good things about her and he wanted to try and have a proper conversation with her.

Truth was… he was not the greatest communicator when it came to women. He had  a few relationships, but most of the times the women threw themselves at him. This time he wanted to make the first step and he was terrified.

So, after assigning homework to his class he decided to go to the only man who had a stellar success with women.

His friend Fenrys was the coach of the volleyball team and always surrounded by females. Maybe he could have some insight from him and get Aelin’s attention.

With long strides he crossed the school halls and eventually reached the gym and inside he saw his friend wrapping up practice.

“Roro, my friend. What brings you down here?” He threw a ball at his friend and Rowan caught it swiftly.

A moment later Fenrys moved to the other side of the net and nodded at the other man as if in saying bring it on. Fen assumed a defensive position and Rowan walked towards the end line and prepared to serve. He bounced the ball a few times and then leapt in a run and jumped, spiking the ball with a loud crack.

Fenrys was ready but Rowan had thrown him one of his famous serves that ended in an ace.

“Are you sure you still want to teach biology to these hellions?”

Rowan walked to his friend “Aye, my ACL is not very keen on the sport anymore.”

Rowan had been a volleyball player and after uni he had gone pro for a couple of years. But then during a game he injured his ACL and that was it for him, so he had gone into teaching biology. His second passion after volleyball.

“So, how can I help?”

The two men sat on the benches court side.

“I need help.”

“Ro my man, there’s still hope for you. You are not on Lorcan’s levels yet.”

Rowan glared at his friend “lady problems.”

Fenrys face broke in a bright smile “well, you came to the very expert. Women love me.”

They were both silent while Rowan tried to formulate the question in his head. Fenrys was always confident. He was not.

“So, who is the hottie who has your pants twisted in a knot?”

Rowan muttered something intelligible.

“Hm?”

“Aelin.” He repeated in an almost grunt.

“Ohhh look at you, trying to play with the big league. I don’t think she has good taste though. She rejected me.”

Rowan was shocked “you hit on her?”

Fenrys scoffed “Hell yes, I wanted to offer her the Moonbeam welcome pack but she declined.”

A deep groan left Rowan’s lips at the innuendo.

“Have you talked to her?”

“No? I freeze when she is around. By now she thinks I am a psychopath.”

“Nah, don’t degrade yourself like that. You are just bad with women.”

“How can I talk to her?”

Fenrys tapped his lips with his finger in a pensive motion “Ask her about something she likes.”

A blank stare was Rowan’s reply.

“She is an English teacher, which means that maybe she likes books? Ask her about the books she likes,” he explained “you are a boring bookworm too, she might well be the woman for you.”

Books. Rowan mentally slapped himself for not having thought about that before. That was a conversation he could have. He loved reading too.

“Ok… that I think I can do.”

“Go Rowie, and get some. Rowan junior needs action.”

Rowan waved at his friend and walked out of the gym and back in his office to mull over his plan to try and talk to Aelin.

A few days had passed and Rowan had studied Aelin’s schedule and knew that on a Wednesday she had a break long enough between classes that she loved to take a moment to herself and go outside and sit on a bench under the trees and read. It was the perfect location, away enough from other teacher to hide his shame if she shut him down.

It was a warm day and he strolled through the school yard in his blu shirt with sleeves rolled up and a book in his hand. When he got to the bench Aelin was there and he paused. She had a gorgeous summery green dress on and a green ribbon around her long blonde hair. All Rowan could think was that she was stunning. She was reading and he felt like a bastard for interrupting her, but he wanted to talk to Aelin really badly.

He forced his body to move and then stopped I front of her.

Blue eyes looked up at him in surprise “do you need anything?”

Rowan tried to speak but words failed him “I…”

Come on big man, you can do it, one word after the other “Books.” He eventually blurted out pointing out at the book she was holding in a perfect imitation of a caveman.

“Yes, this is a book.” The smile that she gave him had the power to melt him. How was it that this woman had such power over him?

“Book,” he repeated, lifting his “I have a book too.” Gods he was pathetic. Why did he listen to Fen? Someone gave him a shovel and help him dug his grave because he was dying of embarrassment.

“You like fantasy too?” She added, noticing the book he was carrying.

Rowan grabbed the book under his arm and stared at the title. He always had at least two in his backpack and he had just grabbed a random one to try and impress her.

“I do.”

“I read that. It’s really good. How are you finding it so far?”

It was working, she was talking to him “I am enjoying it very much, I find the world building pretty incredible.”

Aelin gave him a bright smile “the author is incredibly skilled at that. What about the characters?”

He sat on the bench at her side, feeling a sudden surge of courage “I am struggling with Celaena. Hope she gets better.”

Aelin gave him a warm laugh and Rowan stared at her in fascination “she will steal your heart soon. Give her time.”

“I trust you,” he said quietly.

“I am Aelin, I teach English.” A hand extended in from of her.

“Rowan, biology.”

“I know,” a soft confession “I have been wondering when you were going to find the courage to finally talk to me.”

Rowan’s mouth fell open in disbelief.

“I saw you many times walking towards me and then stopping and retreating.” Another beautiful smile “Looks like the captain of the Orynth Hawks is not as fierce with women as he is on the volleyball court?”

“I…” and the stuttering was back.

Aelin stood “I watched a lot of your games, captain.”

Rowan looked up. His gaze followed her perfect legs all the way up to her stunning face.

She made a move to walk away but he stopped, his hand gently grabbing hers “tickets.” He cleared his gruff voice “I have tickets for the next game. Come with me and then we can go and hit a bookstore.”

Aelin squeezed his hand back “who says that the icy captain does not know how to woo women?”

Rowan stared at her with apprehension.

“Of course I am coming, Whitethorn.” One second her lips were on his cheek, the next she was walking away with her head turned to him and a beautiful smile painted on her face.

He was taking Aelin to a volleyball game of his old team and then a bookstore.

He did it.

Definitely had to find a way to set up women to one of the pro women’s team as a thank you for his pep talk.

He fist pumped the air and with a spring in his step went back to his office with the biggest smile stamped on his face.

taglist

@rowaelinismyotp @swankii-art-teacher @whimsicallyreading @elentiyawhitethorn @aelin-bitch-queen @bruiseonthefaceofhumanity  @mis-lil-red @thegreyj @sailorsassley @leiawritesstories @clairec79 @morganofthewildfire @sv0430 @heartless--aromantic @autumnbabylon @rowanaelinn @backtobl4ck @susumaus98  @gracie-rosee @mybloodrunsblue @tanvee1231 @avenrebekah @whoever-you-choose-to-love  @theywillnotsingforme @universallytreepost @black-daisy-water @goddess-aelin @whispers-in-the-darkest-heart @lovely-dove-zee @athena127

#rowaelin #rowan whitethorn #rowan x aelin #rowaelin fanfiction #rowaelin fanfic #aelin x rowan #rowanwhitethorn #throne of glass fanfiction #aelin galathynius

[sanaxo-o]

spread some love !

talk about your favourite mutuals and why you like them

I am only tagging the mutuals who I talk on a daily basis. I truly love, respect and look up to every single mutual of mine and I am really grateful to have them in my life because I don’t think I would have come this far without them :)

@o-onikix : Nara is literally my closest and dearest friend I could ask for. She literally knows everything about me, she is also someone who pays close attention to me and always remembers the littlest things I say. Like once we were talking and I mentioned about me liking butterscotch cake and a few days later when we were on call and I was eating a cake Nara went “Is that butterscotch cake?” Without even me having to tell her. It made me genuinely so happy because tbh she might be the only irl friend who pays so close attention to me and my well being. Not only that you will always see me running to her whenever I am in some kind of misery and she would always be there for me and listen to me. I still remember how I was there with Nara when we were talking about ghosts 😭. Poor baby was shaking 💀 but tbh…she’s cute like that haha. I love you so much Nara 🥺

@from-izzy : ironic how it’s about to be a year since I sent you that flirty text as our first conversation. Omg glad I got this ask now. So yesterday I had this huge argument and was upset but do you know what izz does? She call me to check on me to know if I am okay 🥺. Like that made me realise that I truly am surrounded by such lovable and caring people and that also especially someone like izzy knowing she was herself freaking out over her assignments yet she called me :( it made me want to cry (happy tears yall). And tbh even though me and izzy argue most of the time her silly stuff at the end of the day I always go to her knowing I cannot live a day without hearing her rant about uni. Mine and Izzy’s friendship cannot be described in one paragraph tbh 😭. Like we have way too many dynamics for that 😭. We can be flirting on one app, bickering on another and having a deep conversation on some whole another app. To sum it up, I trust izzy a loads and I always go to her when I have to talk about something :) love you 🥺

@winterchimez : my Als, mu Sabrina Carpenter enthusiasts, the one who bears my crazy ass 🥺. We literally bonded over Sabrina Carpenter and I love that for us. I always go to ally when I see something negative or just to talk about something I get stressed about and you know what fills my heart? She is always there for me. Despite everything she’s been going through, she still manages to have a talk with me and I admire her for that. Not only that she might be one of the strongest people out there for still doing what she’s doing despite the struggles. Me and ally are someone who would always be together (as she said, we’re Kyunyu) she’s also ig the third mutual I made on this app which is really important for me because it wasn’t easy for me at that time knowing my writing was always dark and it made me kind of reluctant on making friends, scared people might judge me but Ally just out here accepting me as her gremlin. (I will always send you Sangyeon stuff. Once you see this expect that Sangyeon video in your DMs mam). Love you despite all the stuff I pull up with hehe.

@strayed-quokka : me and Lenlen met just this year, in feb but we got insanely close so fast it’s crazy. If you are a moot of Lennon you can expect some adventures from her side which will always make you go “WHAT? HOW ARE YOU? EVERYTHING ALRIGHT??” Like no kidding. I used to also read her TBZ work (by that I mean that Sunwoo fic) before I became her moot and I still cannot accept the fact that we’re now moots 😭🥺. She has my heart and we’re married I believe. The one thing I always look forward to is “Good morning Sana” from lenlen which just makes me smile like a kid 🥺. Me and lenlen also have such chaotic moments together, she’s always up to something in the DMs tbh 😭. And when you see me and lenlen together expect some crazy flirtings from both sides haha cause it’s never gonna stop. I still admire how lenlen and @from-izzy were there for me when I was scared and hid myself in the washroom:( it made me feel so much more better and safer knowing they are there for me no matter what.

@mosviqu : despite me and Boo starting off on some..meh terms (it’s not my fault you thought I was bullying you 😐) we grew so close after that tbh 😭. Me and bar from talking about her Sunwoo fic to me making a doc of Eric fic which only she has the access to 🥺. The words are not enough, because there’s so much to talk about her, from her writing, to her sweet personality, to her chaotic energy which just explodes out of nowhere. She also never fails to amaze me with her choice of words sometimes…

@cloverdaisies : we haven’t talked talked lately because (fuck your job and uni. They’re taking you away from me 😭🥺) life happened but I look up to clo and her writing so much it’s unimaginable. I remember how I was fangirling about her to ally and ally going “oh she’s my mutual” and me not believing it until clo started following me which made me want to scream and die out of happiness + embarrassment because hello?? Your favourite author just followed you 😭. And now when it comes to clo…I don’t trust her (jk) but I love her. She is…she makes me question reality with what she says everytime 😐. But I will never forget how clo was there for me when I needed her the most. She was listening to me talk when I was scared and I was truly glad because there was someone who was there to listen to me.

@astrae4 : Gill is like my child who always gets herself in trouble 😐😭. We always simp, sob, cry and scream over the one and only Choi Chanhee but despite that she gives some of the great advices when you need it. And no I am not gonna play that restaurant game ever again child-

@quaissants : my gremlin, my pudding 🥰. I trouble her like…everyday which makes her want to kill me (enemies to lovers?-) but despite that she helps me a loads when it comes to writing 🥺. We mostly interact on the server but nowadays I talk with her in DMs too which I am grateful for <3

@itsbeeble : hmm…I love you but I won’t stop bullying you (I don’t even bully you. You just think I bully you and it’s just your mind playing games with you because it’s always filled with Eric and Sunwoo…) jk but because of her busy schedule we don’t get to talk much but whenever she comes back from her disappearance those days might be one of the best ones because I have fun with her and izzy. Hope you’re alright and healthy since you disappeared. Again.

#moots 💗 #izzy ☀️ #ally 🌥️ #clo 🌸 #bar 🦄 #Lennon 🍋 #nara 💫 #gill 🐧 #reese 🍫 #Mona 👹

[airenyah]

Current Tag Game

I was tagged by @telomeke and @lurkingteapot <3

Current Time:

23:14 as of me posting this

Current activity:

lying on my stomach in bed, typing out this ask game

Currently thinking about:

all the things i have to do for uni and also that one interpretation test i have on monday rip

Current favourite song:

listen. LISTEN. it is such a fun song, okay!! i love the vibes!! it just always puts me in a good mood, okay!!

Currently reading:

just a whooole bunch of stuff for uni. namely, italian articles on sustainable tourism for my interpretation test on monday (gotta familiarize myself with the lingo...) and some scientific literature on fansubbing for a paper i have to write on this topic this semester

Currently watching:

not a lot, i started my master's degree like a month ago and i haven't really started any new shows since

i've been trying to finish home school all summer and i'm still only on ep13 as of now rip (i might go watch another ep later, let's see how sleepy i am)

i also started watching bbs for the 23rd time a week ago! i'm doing a weekly anniversary rewatch and soooo tomorrow i get to watch ep2 hehe

oh and my mom sat me down in front of the kdrama andante the other day. we watched 3 or 4 episodes before i went back to the cursed city and so i'll be watching that over the next few weeks whenever i go back home

i might start another show at some point over the next week, idk. right now i'm trying not to get distracted bc of uni

Current favourite character:

pat napat jindapat has been living rent free in my head for the past two years now

Current WIP:

i think i have a bbs vs hidden agenda parallel gifset as well as a bbs vs only friends parallel gifset somewhere that i started in september and then just never finished???? idk. i'll have to go into my folders

plus, i started recording some thoughts on bbs and pat specifically for a meta that has been in my head for 2 whole years but never really posted. considering 24 months have passed and we all are still here i'm like... okay maybe posting it is worth it after all. so yeah, let's see if that will ever get written. it's not anything special, just some thoughts on my reading of pat and his awareness/obliviousness of his feelings. bc that differs from popular fandom interpretation

Tags:

uhhhh idk who's been tagged yet and who hasn't buuuut i'm just gonna say @newyearknwwme @killiru @visualtaehyun @moonkhao @cornflowershade

#tag game #Youtube

[artacetinker]

Uhhhh how am I doing this

Probably more then pics to go with

Yeah let's do that 👍

Here we go

It's set in the future, I haven't made a date yet but it's a work in progress like every thing else. It's far enough in the future that a bunch of cities have either grown or merged into a bunch of metropolitan cities all over earth. Obviously this means more power to keep them running hence there's I giant nuclear reactor in the middle of this one.

Having learnt from other accidents, they build the actual reactor bit with the radiation and stuff as realistically far underground as they can

But they apparently didn't learn and the reactor does a little Chornobyl

Now a little magic comes in and instead of killing everyone, it's stop the residents from physically aging

NO IT'S NOT REALISTIC IT'S A FANTASY UNIVERSE THAT MAKES ME HAPPY. IF YOU HAVE A PROBLEM RESPECTFULLY MOVE ALONG PLEASE!!

so the residents now have I minor form of basic immortality and this is just the prologue? Intro? Of this little universe

NOW

my world is set only a few years after, I'm thinking about 4-6 ish years. Adults are having fun and just currently finding ways to cure illnesses as the reactor obviously didn't stop them from getting sick. So that's going on and if the adults stopped, then the children have obviously not aged either.

Now kids will be kids.

They have basic wants, needs, desires etcetera etcetera and the government is the government. A bunch of assholes. They don't care about the kids and have kind of abandonded them at this point resulting in A LOT of children either in orphanages or simply on the streets, being uncared for, with only some lucky ones being able to stay with their families for a plethora of reasons I can't be asked to make or explain.

This has caused groups to form which I'll go into more detail about soon but the Metropolis has been divided into 4 groups, or sectors as they're called, each with a different characteristic

First we have the North sector also known as the Education sector

The East sector known as the Industrial sector

The South, known as the Leisure sector

And finally the West, commonly known as the trade sector

Each sector has a chosen leader or (in the West's case) group in charge

In charge of what?

Trading, gaining money, alliances, saftey and in general; caring for the children that make up their group or whatever

So far; North, south and east are represented with colours

North is gold

East is crimson

And South is a light purple and neon green (woooo Disney villain colours or whatever)

I haven't decided west yet, give me time

I've got a few basic ideas for the areas sorry if my handwriting is shit I'll type it aswell

It's not the best yet but I'm saving that for later

Anyway

The North sector- knowledge

The North is led by Amir, aged 15

He's half Syrian and is lucky to still live with his mother

Most educational systems are located here, mostly unis and colleges

Not too many children stay here as there are more adults up here than anything as the government is most notably located here aswell

It's seen as strict and formal and is represented with the mark of a golden quill because quills... Knowledge, you get the idea

Next

Sorry it's side ways, I'm not spoiling anything yet

The East sector- industrial

The East sector is led by the youngest leader, Irene, aged 14

She's 1/3 Japanese from her mother and 1/3 Greek from her father (weird combo I know makes it better)

Industrial was a friends suggestion because I had no other idea what to call it.

It has most of the cities seamstresses, blacksmiths (cuz cool ass weapons) and shops in general

Over here it's custom to wear animal themed masks (interpret this how you like just don't be an ass about it)

Some do it to hide identity, some do it as a form of identity (don't be an ass) but some do it as Irene wears one and they follow suit

Irene herself wears a lightweight deer make that shes decorated the Antlers with using various jewellery such as rings, bangle, bracelets, necklaces, small chains and earrings. This causes the mask to make small jingles (how tf do you describe jewellery sounds?) as she moves

This sector is represented with a mark of a crimson key (it's a mix of the Greek and Japanese symbol for power and I'm very happy with is :D)

Up next

The South sector- leisure

The South sector is led by Cael, our Irish little drawf (I made them ginger too cuz LEPRECHAUNZZ). They are (funnily enough) the second oldest leader at 16

This sector doesn't need to much explaining as people come here to relax, have fun, party, yadda yadda ya

(Shit I could have called it the recreation sector... Leisure sounds more right tho... Fuck)

This sectors group is known for being a wild bunch, with Cael gladly taking charge. Wearing a brightly colored assortment of clothes and styles, this lot are known to host 24/7 parties in many hidden clubs, nooks and crannies

This sector in general has most of the big ass multi story buildings in such a small space giving it a maze like feel with all the alleyways and such. A great place for unmonitered children to go nuts to their hearts desire

This lively bunch are represents with a Royal lotus, a symbol of relaxation and in my head cannon, refuge

And finally

Again sorry for it being sideways

The West sector- trade

Much like the south, this sector needs probably no explanation

Unlike the others, a group of friends leads the biggest sector of the Metropolis, all of them are Colombian so not only do they know their way around the city like the backs of their hands, they know a lot of people and can get away with shit a lot of other children cant

We have:

Carlos- the oldest of the bunch at 17, hes the strongman if the group

Next we have Gitana aged 16- she's the traveller (illeagally but thats not a problem)

Then we have Tayci and her twin brother Kaimi both at 15- Tayci is a silent runner with Kaimi being a perfect lookout for the group

There's a lot so buckle up

The West sector is by the shore, with most of the citys docks being located here with ships constantly moving in and out. This group was the first to form, having claimed most of the city and has used this to trade with the other sectors and a few smaller groups, overall earning the most income

Each member has used the docks to their advantage as well, having different roles allocated to them through their strengths in order to do so.

What is this may you ask?

Easy

Theft

They steal from boats coming into to the city in order to supply the rest of it in general. They group together with a bunch of other children and split up, collecting anything useful or I'm demand

Carlos is the oldest and strongest, being able to carry heavier crates

Tayci is quick and quiet, being able to zip around unnoticed

And Kaimi has some insane fucking vision, making him a perfect lookout from a high enough angle, using walkie talkies to guide the group undetected

Gitana's approach is a bit different and with Carlos's approval, has her own group of 8-11 that illeagally hop on the boats leaving the ports, travelling to other countries. Once over there they take anything that may not usually be imported over to the Metropolis and bring it home.

They do not currently have a symbol or colour but I'm thinking a grey one with Gitana's go up having a blue one to go with, the blue representing the water as they travel overseas

DONE

This was a lot to type, time to address stuff

Yes there are probably many faults in this which will be covered in posts to come, either on purpose or by coincidence

No I'm not giving too much info on the characters

HOWEVER

I have 2 designs which I might do like teasers or something for so anyone reading this isn't left in the dark for 2 spontaneous months (I need to get my shit together and be more consistent. I'm trying I swear)

Ive got some background for the South currently as it's so far the most visually pleasing to imagine for me and I may post either later or tomorrow depending on how quick I do my fucking homework

I'm trying to sort a lot of it out so it makes more sense

I hope anyone reading this is as excited as I am

I will post moths at some point but this has me hooked right now so I might do a huge art dump

Also next month I'm getting a iPad for me birthday 🥳🥳🥳 so I can finally do digital art so anything I post now shall hopefully be better quality

I will remind anyone probably closer to the date aswell

If you read this and am interested, please stay 🙏🙏🙏

I'm very passionate about this and if anyone at all enjoys it I'll be more than happy to continue

Thank you for reading this far

I admire your patience, willingness and overall generosity to listen to a yr 11 ramble about their passion project

#my art #my ocs #brainrot #the brainrot is brainrotting #the brainrot is real #i love the brainrot #i love this #The Metropolis

[sillytaetime]

Forbidden~ Y.Jh FF

Desc:// Your brother and his best friend are 3 years older than you and you’ve always been the butt of their jokes. It just so happens that ever since you met your brother’s best friend, you’ve had a huge crush on him. After the two of them disappeared to college several hours away for a few years, you thought your crush on him had gone away. Maybe you were too quick to judge...

Warnings:// angst; fluff; suggestive scenes (smut is skipped); mentions of Enhypen Sunoo

Type:// One-Shot

Pairings:// hotbrothersbsf!Jeonghan x virgin!reader

WC:// 4,205

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°

As long as i can remember, Jeonghan’s always been around. He’s supposed to be like family. When my mom decided it was time to sit down at the table and have a traditional “Hong family dinner”, Jeonghan was there. It’s like my mom adopted him as a son. I just can’t help that i found him charming. the smile he always had on his face, his laugh, everything.

I used to get bullied at school a lot. To quote them, I looked like a stone wall. “Flat and boring.” It was ever long that those kids could mess with me before my brother and Jeonghan showed up scaring them off. My brother may have teased me a lot growing up, but it was always in a joking manner. He never meant to hurt me so of course he wouldn’t stand to let kids bully me.

I was 16 when Josh left for college, but that was 2 years ago. I'm 18 now. My body isn't flat anymore, I've filled out and gotten some curves. Even though nobody's bullied me recently, I don't have many friends... just Sunoo. I've known Sunoo since I was 4 and we've been inseparable since.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~♡

y/n pov

Currently, my mom’s in the kitchen making dinner while Sunoo and I are in my room studying. Once my brother gets here, we won't have much quiet time. It'll be party after party and of course Sunoo and I would go, we need to meet the people that we'll be going to college with since uni starts in a few months.

"CAN YOU GUYS COME AND BE MY TASTE TESTERS FOR A MINUTE?”  My mom yells from the kitchen... So, we head downstairs to help her. As we taste the sauce, a loud noise comes from the front door, a second later, Josh pops up from around the corner. “Hey mom! Hey y/n!” Joshua hugs my mom and greets me. He then notices Sunoo. “Hey, wassup man.” Sunoo says hello back and then we walk back up to my room. On our way towards the stairs, my face comes into contact with someone’s chest and Sunoo catches me. When i look up, I see Jeonghan. It’s been forever since I’ve seen him. He looks even more attractive after these 2 years. His hair is short now,, and its blonde. I quickly grab Sunoo’s hand and sprint up to my room not even sparing Jeonghan a glimpse.

“What was that y/n??” “I-I don’t know...” “Don’t lie to me." “I freaked out. I didn't know he was coming." "I know you said you're over him... but is it possible that you may still be attracted to him?" "Maybe..." "Let's hope this dinner goes well." “Yeah.” I always tried to play off that I was over Jeonghan but after seeing him a few seconds ago, i most definitely am not over him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~♡

“Y/N!! SUNOO!! COME DOWN FOR DINNER!!” “Finally!” Sunoo loves food, especially my mom’s food so it’s not surprising for him to be excited for dinner. The dinner was awkward. Sunoo nudged me slightly, bringing me out of my thoughts. he whispered to me... “y/n, Jeonghans staring at you.” I looked Jeonghan’s way and he was definitely staring. Surprisingly, he kept staring at me even after i caught him. His lips formed to a cocky smirk as he stared into my soul. “So, Jeonghan... how was college for you? Have you gotten yourself a girlfriend yet?” I nearly spit out my drink when my mom brought up Jeonghan dating. “Ah, well mrs. Hong, I haven’t really tried dating much. I wanted to focus on college more.”

“Oh, come on now!! A handsome guy like you has to have a girlfriend!” Jeonghan just looks down and blushes. “Jeonghan’s never had a girlfriend.” When my brother stated that, my eyes almost popped out of my head. “Aww, and why’s that??” “He’s had a crush on some girl for years but he won’t tell anyone who she is.” I pipe up and start to tease Jeonghan, “what’s with the secrets Hannie? I thought we were supposed to be family.” Jeonghan giggled at my statement. He later excused himself to the restroom.

Jeonghan didn’t return back to the dinner table after that. We finished our meal in silence. “Thanks for dinner mom!” “You’re welcome, y/n.” With that, Sunoo and I head back up to my room. “I’m going to go to the bathroom.” “Ok. ill be in my room.” As I’m sitting in my room, someone knocks. “Sunoo, you know you don’t need to knock.” “It’s not Sunoo...” When i look up, i see Jeonghan at the door. “Can I come in?” “Yeah, I guess that’s fine.” Jeonghan walks in and looks at the pictures of me and Sunoo on my wall. “Is he your boyfriend?” “Who? Sunoo?” “Yeah, you two have always been close. I wouldn’t be surprised.” “No, we aren’t dating, Jeonghan. Why do you care?” “I just want you to date someone who cares about you. Sunoo obviously does.” “NOT in that way!” I giggle at his silliness.

“Well, at least I’ve dated someone!” “Hey! you can’t use that against me!” “Imagine being stuck on one person for years.” I tease. “If you saw how beautiful she is you’d understand.” “Why won’t you tell her you like her?” “I can’t. It’s wrong.” “How’s it wrong?” “I’m friends with her brother. He specifically said I can’t fall for her.” “But why won’t you tell Josh?” “Joshua is friends with him and i really don’t want his judgement.” “I’m sorry...” “It’s fine, you were just curious. I better get going, Joshua and I are going to a party.” “Oh cool." "Are you going?" "I think so. I have to check with Sunoo." "Alright. Maybe I'll see you there." "Yeah." And with that, Jeonghan exits my room. Moments later, Sunoo comes in. "Hey, Sunoo, we're still going to the party tonight, right?" "Of course."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~♡

So now, Sunoo and I are getting ready for the party, and I have no clue what to wear. “Ew. no, absolutely not. Something else.” “Sunoo this is all I got.” “Lemme look at your closet.” “I doubt you’ll find anything but go for it.” After a few minutes of Sunoo rummaging through my closet, he pulls out the sluttiest dress he could find. “Wear this.” “Sunoo, I don’t want to look like a slut.” I hear my brother yell from downstairs. I run down the hall to the bathroom to put the dress on. When i walk back into my room, Sunoo screams “AHHHH Y/N YOU LOOK HOTT!!!” I blush. “Thank you, Sunoo. If we don’t get going now, we will be late.” “Alright. let’s go.” I grab my shoes and close my bedroom door. 

“Hey mom, can I drive your car to the Party?” “Sure thing, y/n. You two have fun!!"  “Don’t worry mom!!” “Call me if anything happens!” “We will!” and we leave to go to the party.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~♡

Finally, Sunoo and I arrived at the party, we could hear the music from a block away. We walked inside and immediately smelled alcohol. Sunoo and I went to find the dance floor and started dancing and for a while that's all we did, until a girl asked Sunoo to dance. After Sunoo went to dance with that girl, i walked over to the bar to get a drink. As im sitting at the bar i feel a pair of eyes on me. When i look around, I see Jeonghan. He’s looking right at me, biting his lip. I look away to hide my blush. Not even a second later, a guy comes up to me. “Hello pretty lady, what’re you doing all by yourself?” “My best friend went to dance with someone so now I’m alone.” “Mind if I keep you company?” “I guess some company would be nice.” “Im Mingyu and you are?” “Im y/n. Nice to meet you, Mingyu.” “Nice to meet you too, y/n”.  After a while of talking to Mingyu, I notice i have to go to the bathroom so i excuse myself. “Ill be right back, i need to make a quick trip to the bathroom.” “Alright. I’ll be here.” With that, I leave. 

As I’m making my way back to Mingyu, someone grabs me and pulls me around the corner. “What are you doing with him?” I look up and see Jeonghan. “Um... I’m talking to him. Mingyu’s a nice guy.” “No, he just wants to get his dick wet.” “You’ve got to be kidding me. Jeonghan I’m not a virgin. Why does it matter?” “I don’t want to see you get hurt.” “Shut up. Just go find that girl you like so much and let me fuck someone if I want to.” ���I’ve already found her.” “Then why are you here? Go talk to her” I try to wiggle out of his grip, but he pins me to a close by wall. “I’m looking at her.” “What?” At that moment, the hints he’s been giving all day has finally clicked. “Hannie... Am I the girl?” “Yeah... and Joshua would kill me if he found out.” “Well, I’m not going to tell him.” “You’re not?” “Well, I won’t if you let me fuck Mingyu.” With that statement, Jeonghan Kisses me. It was passionate but filled with lust. Of course, I returned the kiss and it turned into heated, sloppy kissing. I break the kiss and lift my eyebrow. “Deal or not?” “I don’t think i like the idea of you and Mingyu.” “Well, if you wanna keep this a little secret, you’ll let me go.” Reluctantly, Jeonghan releases me and looks down at the ground. I fix my dress and make my way to Mingyu. “Hey!” “Oh, hey! I thought you ditched me.” “Yeah, im sorry something came up. I need to find my friend and head home.” “Oh, alright. Maybe I’ll see you around then, y/n.” “Bye Mingyu. It was nice meeting you.”

I made my way through the crowd looking for Sunoo, but I couldn’t seem to find him. So, I pulled out my phone and text Sunoo that I’m heading home. I told him that I was going to walk so he could drive the car. He has the keys anyway. I started walking down the sidewalk when someone yelled my name. “Y/N!” I turned around to see Jeonghan running towards me. “What are you doing?” “I’m going home.” “Let me drive you.” “Doesn’t Joshua need a way home?” “Nah, he left a while ago. He went home with some girl.” “Oh. Alright then.” As he’s driving, Jeonghan puts his hand on my exposed thigh. “Pull the car over.” “What? Why?” “Just do it, please.” Jeonghan pulls the car to the side of the road. “Push your seat all the way back.” He does as I say and he just looks at me. I take this moment to climb onto his lap. Jeonghan looks shocked but he doesn’t push me away. Instead, he placed his hands on my hips. “Kiss me.” “What?” “Are you really going to complain? You confessed to me 15 minutes ago and now you’re just going to turn down a chance to-” He interrupted me by kissing me harshly. I placed my hands on the hem of his shirt, tugging slightly, telling him to take it off, which he gladly does. I admired his abs as he started kissing down my neck. “Are you sure you want this?” He whispered. “I-I ahh... yes. Jeonghan, just fuck me.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~♡

“YOU DID WHAT LAST NIGHT?!” “Shhh lower your voice... Joshua might hear you.” As soon as i said that, Joshua and Jeonghan walk past my bedroom, the words i hear make my eyes go wide. “I can’t believe you lost your virignity last night.” Sunoo and I look at each other wide eyed. “y/n... you heard that too right?” All i can do is nod my head. I can’t believe I took Jeonghans virginity last night. He semed like he knew what he was doing, like he’d done it a million times. Apparently not. I feel like absolute shit right now.

“EVERYONE COME DOWN FOR BREAKFAST!!” Oh shoot. How am I supposed to look at Jeonghan after last night. Sunoo and I walk downstairs to the dinning room and to my luck, Josh and Jeonghan are already there. I keep my eyes trained on the floor as i take my seat accross from jeonghan. Sunoo sits next to me. “So, how was the party?” my mom asks. “It was good. I think Jeonghan had a good time for sure.” Says Josh. I look up at Jeonghan and he’s just looking at his plate. “Oh really? What happened last night, dear?” For the first time, Jeonghan speaks up. “I- uh I was hanging out with the girl i like.” “Oh! Isn’t that lovely. Ahh young love.” As my mom says that, I excuse myself from the table to go to the bathroom. When i get done in the bathroom i start walking back to my room when someone pins me to the wall.

“Jeonghan... what if we get caught...” “We won’t.” “How do you know?” “Sunoo left and your mom and brother are doing dishes.” “Ok... well, what do you want?” “You.” Jeonghan smashed his lips on mine. I returned the kiss adding my tongue in the mix. We fought for dominance a little before I pulled away, a thin line of our mixed saliva the only thing connecting us. “Jeonghan... listen-” “y/n, I’ll do anything just to keep you in my life. Even if it means lying to Joshua.” “I don’t want to lie to my brother...” “So, does that mean we’re done? Just like that?” “No, just give me time to think about this...” “Ok.” Jeonghan lets me go and heads down the hall to Joshua’s room. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~♡

A knock on my door the next morning woke me up. “y/n... can I come in?” “Sure... Josh.” He comes in and sits at the foot of my bed as i sit up rubbing my eyes. “Are you feeling ok? you haven’t come out of your room much... did something happen at the party?” “NO. No. I’m fine, I just needed to catch up on some sleep.” “Oh, alright. If you say so. There’s another party tonight. Jeonghan and I are going, i was going to ask if you and Sunoo would like to come-” “Yes! We’ll come.” “You sure?” “Yeah. But we’ll drive separately.” “Ok. Hopefully I’ll get to see you at this party.” “I’ll come look for you.” “Sounds good.” Joshua smiled and left my room, keeping the door cracked open. I immediately text Sunoo telling him to come over at 6. An hour before the party.

When Sunoo arrives, i bring him up to my room and ask him if the outfit on my bed is good. “Y/N!! This is hot!!” “I know, right!” “Why are you suddenly excited to dress so revealing?” “Well, maybe I’ll get lucky and see Mingyu again...” “The guy you ditched to have sex with Jeonghan?” “Well, when you put it like that it sounds bad.” I pout. “It is bad. Just stick to secret fucks with Jeonghan. He would treat you wayyyy better than MIngyu. He just wants to get his dick wet.” “And I just want to get dicked down. what’s the problem here?” Sunoo just keeps silent. I hear my brother and Jeonghan leave as I’m finishing my makeup. “Sunoo, can you get my mom’s car keys and start the car? I’ll be down in a minute. I just need to put my heels on.” “Alright, hurry up.” 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~♡

Sunoo and I arrived to the party after about a 30-minute drive. When we got there, I saw my brother and Jeonghan walking up so I quickly got out of the car and ran up to my brother, hugging him. I felt Jeonghan’s eyes on me so i looked up and said “Hey Jeonghan!” I let go of my brother and hugged Jeonghan. I felt him tense up a little bit but he melted into the hug. Once Sunoo caught up to us, Sunoo and I went to the bar while my brother and Jeonghan went to the dance floor. “So, y/n, you really wanna see Mingyu again?” “Not really. I just said that in case my brother was listening. I wanna steal Jeonghan away and talk to him... maybe a little more...” “y/n you can’t get caught doing things with him.” “I won’t.” “If your so sure about it then i guess have fun.”

About 2 hours into the party, Sunoo followed a girl to the dance floor and i decided it was time to look for Jeoghan. I left the bar and made my way to the hallway. A little ways down i saw a figure that looked like Jeonghan... with a girl... I gasped and Jeonghan looked at me like a dear in headlights. He let go of the girl immediately and tried to come to me but i quickly ran the other way. I bumped into Joshua on my way to the door. “y/n? what’s wrong?” “I-I I need to leave.” “Do you need a ride home?” “I was going to look for Sunoo but i really don’t want to go back inside...” “You go wait on the porch; I’ll go find Sunoo.” I do as my brother says ad a few seconds later, Jeonghan comes up next to me. “y/n...” “Leave me alone, Jeonghan.” “Listen to me...” “No. Go away.” Jeonghan grabs my hands. I jerk my hands away, almost falling over but Jeonghan catches me. Sunoo runs up to us and shoves Jeonghan. “She said leave her alone.” Jeonghan looks at us in disbelief as I cling to Sunoo. Jeonghan shakes his head and heads back into the party. I start crying. “T-thank you Sunoo...” “Shhh. Let’s get you home.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~♡

I’m just relaxing in my room when someone knocks at the door. “Who is it?” I ask. “It’s Josh. Can I come in?” “Yeah.” Josh comes in and sits at the foot of my bed. “Are you ok? You haven’t come out of your room since that scene at the party...” “Yeah, I’m fine.” “Do you want to talk about what happened? You know I’m a good listener.” “Yeah, you are a good listener, but I’d rather not talk about what happened a few days ago.” “Alright. I was just checking. Jeonghan and I are going to laser tag tonight, would you and Sunoo wanna join us?" "Thanks for the offer... but I think I'll skip out this time." "Alright. Maybe next time then. I've got to go get ready, I love you, y/n." "Love you too joshy."

About 2 hours after my conversation with Josh, I hear Joshua and Jeonghan leave. I text Sunoo telling him to come over asap, to which Sunoo responds immediately. What felt like 5 seconds later, Sunoo was walking into my room. "That was quick." "Girl, you told me to get over here asap just for you to be laying in bed with makeup running down your face. It's 6pm what are you doing??" "I-" "Stop lurking around over Jeonghan. If he only used you to get rid of his virginity, he wouldn't have chased after you." “You’re right i guess.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~♡

Sunoo and I decided to go shopping, so he helped me get my ruined makeup off and i got dressed in a pair of jeans, a crop top, and my favorite pair of converse and we left to the mall. “y/n! This would look amazing on you!” “Sunoo this is the 6th time you help up that same exact dress! I said no.” “But its in a different color!” “So were the 5 before this one.” “You should try it on.” The dress was a really pretty pink. Maybe I should. “Alright... but if it looks bad, its going back on the rack.” “Yes ma’am.”

I tried on the dress and it looked amazing. It hugged my curves really well. I just don’t know what occasion i’d ever wear it for. I walked out of the dressing room, over to Sunoo. “How’s it look?” “OMG Y/N IT LOOKS AMAZING!! BUY IT, BUY IT, BUY ITTT!!!” “I like it, but where would i wear it?” “There’s a party tomorrow night...” “Sunoo...” I know you said you didn’t want to go to any more parties, but what if you just try to make Jeonghan jealous.” “That’s not a bad idea but what if in the process he just goes and fucks another girl?” “If he truly cares about you, he won’t” “What if he and Josh don’t even go to the party?” “They will. Its a party, why wouldn’t they?” “Well, what if-” “Quite with the what if’s and just buy the dress.” “Fine.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~♡

The party started about an hour ago and all Sunoo and I have done is drink and dance. Sunoo swears he won't leave me alone this time but I know the second s pretty girl comes around he'll be off with her. "Y/n, let's just forget about other people and enjoy ourselves. No girls, no guys, just two best friends having fun." "You know the second a pretty girl comes over here, you'll go dance with her." "No, I won't this time! I promise!" "Whatever Sunoo."

After about 2 hours at this party, Sunoo is wasted so I left him at the bar with a girl who's name I learned is winter. She seems trust worthy. I wanted to go find my brother and say hi to him.

As I'm making my way through the crowd, someone pulls me towards him. My back hits his chest and he whispers in my ear. "Are you trying to turn me on baby girl?" I recognize that voice. "J-jeonghan?" He just hums in response. "Jeonghan what if my brother sees this?" "Then he knows. Big whoop." "No, no, no." I turn around and grab his arm, pulling him towards a more secluded area. "Jeonghan... joshua can't find out about this." "Why not? Y/n just be my girlfriend already." "You were touching another girl!" "I was drunk. I thought she was you!" I fell silent. He definitely wasn't drunk right now...

"Ok." "Just... ok?" "Yeah." Jeonghan and I look at each other for a few moments before we get interrupted. "What he actual fuck is going on?!" We look towards the voice only to find a ver furious Joshua. "J-josh..." Joshua grabs Jeonghan and pulls him away from me. "Move y/n." "Josh... don't do anything stupid." He looks toward jeonghan and let's him go. "Y/n, go get Sunoo, we're taking him home and then we need to talk. Jeonghan, go get in the car."

We part ways and I go to find Sunoo. Once I've grabbed Sunoo, we get in my brother's car and he drops Sunoo off at his house. "Bu bye y/nnie!" "Bye Sunoo. Text me tomorrow."

Once we arrive back to my house, Josh tells me good night and says we'll talk in the morning. Then he and Jeonghan make their way to his room.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~♡

The next morning, im just sitting in my room reading when Joshua knocks at my door. "Y/n, can we talk?" "Yeah..." He opens the door and sighs. He takes a seat next to me. "Why didn't you tell me sooner?" "I was scared of how you'd react." "If you had told me, I wouldn't have reacted lile that last night." "I kn-" "How long have you liked him?" Is voice was calm and almost... accepting? "Since I was 13..." "Really?" "Yeah." "He was the really hot guy you always talked about?" He laughs a little bit. "Yeah... I can't believe you never caught on!" After a while of just talking things out and having a good time, he finishes off the conversation by saying, "If you really like Jeonghan, I'm not going to keep you from him. I can tell he really likes you." I look up at him and break into the largest smile. "He's in the kitchen making breakfast. Why don't you go help him." I get up from my bed and run downstairs to the kitchen, wrapping my arms around Jeonghan. "Well, good morning to you too cutie." I just smile and breath in his scent.

After we've all had breakfast, Jeonghan and I walk to the park. As we're walking, Jeonghan stops and looks at me. "Y/n?" "Yeah?" "Will you be my girlfriend?" I smile and jump into his arms. "Absolutely!" We finish our walk through the park, hand in hand with smiles from ear to ear.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~♡

Maybe if we had all been honest from the beginning, we wouldn't have gone through this Rollercoaster of a love story... but I wouldn't have it any other way. I guess all these years of thinking that a relationship with Jeonghan was forbidden were lies. Joshua is completely fine with it. Obviously he third wheels sometimes, but he let's us have our own time together. We couldn't be happier together. I've always loved romance movies... but living one is the best feeling known to man.

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°

This has literally been in my drafts for weeks. I couldn't find a good way to end the story. I really hope this turned out good and that you all like it! I had fun writing it!

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[a-s-levynn]

from the curious asks: 3, 15, 26?

Ooooh hey there! Thank you for asking!! 🫂💖I hoep you have a lovely day!

3. Do you like the person you feel like you’re becoming? This is not easy to put to words. In general i don't like the person i am. Ever. But i think i see myself in a far worse light than i am probably at, at this point. I like that i'm trying to be someone i actually would like to have around but i am terrified of the idea that it might not be genuin. Which feels like a contradiction. I'm unsure. I like the chosen path but i don't think i'm ever going to actually like myself. And it's not even a confidence thing, because i'm very aware of myself.

15. Do you get wanderlust? Where do you want to go? This is so clishé but anywhere there is large bodies of water where i can't see land on the horizon. I don't know what it is about the see and ocean that draws me but it does. But alas, i'm in a painfully landlocked place.

26. What does your favorite tattoo mean to you? Or if you had to get a tattoo, what would it be? Why? As of yet i only have but one. But i guess a storytime is due about my ST tattoo i guess. But in short. ST means more than i thought in a roundabout way.

So storytime incoming so i think i'll put a cut here because it is long. Like actually long. And i'm too tired to check for typoos right now but i hope it is still readable. But I'm serious, it is very long. You have been warned.

There is a few things coming together into it. I wanted to have a tattoo since i know there are things such as tattoos exist. I never really had the money but even if i'd had i was so indecisive i hade no idea what to have.

Now my ST journey was a weird little thing. And it kinda sounds made up but it's not. It just has weird little coincidences. I think i shared a short version a few months back but this is a bit more detailed account of the events.

First i got aware of the them around when the Sundowning started to release. I'm not remembering exactly but i know i've seen an article about some new music which caught my eye because of Vessel in the original mask.

Pretty much a visual i thoroughly enjoy. So i opted to check out what this thing is. And this is why i think there wasn't much of Sundowning out yet because i did not vibed with it. At all. And the EP's were so far from what i was needing musically back that time. There was one track i kinda liked musically, i know i listened to it a couple of times but that's it. I was still hurt and angry and i needed to drown out noise. So i noted that the looks are cool, the dude had a nice voice it's just not for me.

A few months later a friend of mine sent me a video edit which had a song under it. I never bothered to look up the original. But i listened to that one downloaded track a lot since then.

Que 2021 and the release of Alkaline. I watched it. I know i watched the video. I know i liked it but didn't really connected it back to that nieche weird project with the masked dude because it was so different. And i still wasn't really paying attention, so i moved on to other artists and forgot about it.

And about a year later i was sitting alone in the park i used to hang out when i skipped classes at uni in a particularly shitty day insted of doing anything. It was one of those days when i was floating in a self haterd fueled lonely depressed existencial crisis monstrosity of moment. Which were not rare by any means. The depression part not the sitting in the park part. It was just a particularly shitty one and i wanted to feed ducks to feel something. There was stuff happening. It was a lot. I love that park because it has a pond with a bunch of ducks you can feed. It's peaceful. Anyway all day i had this meoldy in my head and i had no idea what the fuck it was. It annoyed the shit out of me because i didn't know what it was.

So when i went home i started searching to find it before i actually drive myself crazy with it. It took my mind off of what was going on. And that is how i found the offering. That was the one thing i liked when i first got aware of ST. And the instrumental melody of that track was what got somehow pulled out of my subconscious. And something finally clicked. So i went through all the materials. Imagine my bafflement when i realized i listened to an ST song since my friend sent me that stupid edit. It was sugar.

Then of course i checked out tpwbyt over which i'm still hitting myself because it could have been the part of my life sooner if i don't get distracted from alkaline. But yeah that's when i finally paid attention to the lyrics. Pretty much that was the day i finally came around to ST and they became a regular in my listening history because it helped me with my emotions. But i was yet to be insane about them.

But i noticed how much it actually helped me with processing and understanding my feelings in general to listen to their music and thinking about it in relation to myself and i made miles of progress on my own with a set of headphones which 10+ years worth of therapy couldn't even touch. And that is when the idea of the tattoo started to form in my head.

I knew i wanted something that represented my journey to come around to ST. Because in a was i think i had to grew up to it. Or be ready for it. So i wanted something from the era i first got aware of them. And in the end i choose the cover art of the first ep. Because that was the last one of the discography i understood yet it was basically the first thing i heard from them. And then there the flying seeds part of the artwork which kind of felt like these little connecting point. The visuals being eyecatching, me listening to sugar unknowingly, offering coming to my rescue. Little seeds that blossomed into my love for ST.

I also had the idea to have either worship or nothing-lats-forever incorporated but i had no idea how yet. The former one because duh, worship, the second one because it is so true, but i was leaning towards worship from the start. Also the runes were coming with track by track along with tmbte and by the end i was hunting for a better version of the apparition art when there were leaks of track titles and art because i needed that freaking P to finally be able to figure out my tatto. And it was perfect because i wanted something new in it to reflect on the journey of me arriving to this point. And the runes were perfect in that sense.

The idea behind the placement on the underside of my forearm is very simply coming from praying as a nod to the quite heavy religious imagery of ST. I am not religious so i don't really pray but the idea came from that. I mean my tattoo is mostly only visible if i raise my hand and you usually raise your hand at a live show. ST hawing rituals as live shows, we basically worshipping, all that jazz. So it's a nod to that. And the placement kind of decided that i have to rearrenge the art a bit as well.

The last bit is the old sigil insted of the new. Now that is a purely visual decision, because the current one would be too busy of a design in the overall of the tatto.. When i had everything i sent an email to a tattooshop before i went to work and i already had an answer when i arrived in. I called the artist in my next smokebreak to ask for an appointment. She was free the next morning, and the rest is history.

And in retrospect not long after i've seen them live for the fist time (actually twice in 3 days) and that was an experience. I don't know what happend during Higher but the last time i felt something akin to that is when i was 5 and experienced a full solar eclipse. I can't put it to words. But something happend. Something just slid into place in my brain. That is probably why i'm so sure by now that Higher is my favourite track. And i am very much insane about them ever since as you can see.

I'm sorry this got so long, but i never really wrote down my road to st in a detailed manner and it was very fun for me to actually follow back my own path, so thank you so much for the opportunity. And thank you so much if any of you read through this wall of text.

#levynn answers #foundationsofdecay #tag game

[femmefatalevibe]

hello! ive gone through some of your posts and i gotta say, you give pretty solid advice. i hope your own life is also going as smoothly as the advice giving! ❤

i was wondering if i could ask your opinion, as much as you can offer it to a stranger from the internet.... i know its not easy to give meaningful advice on complicated matters to total strangers.

im 29, i have a very good degree and a decent job, i am not more insane or annoying than an average person and i look just fine. i do however have a problem finding a long term partner. ive been working very hard at uni/later as an intern so it didnt leave much time for a rich social life and lot of dating. i also had the misfortune of spending several years in a very unhealthy relationship when i was about 20, young and stupid. several years of determined singleness followed immediatelly after that.

so now that im old and less stupid, ive tried dating apps, ive tried going out for drinks with acquaintances but never more than 2 or 3 times with the same guy. i do have high standards... and im a smart independent woman which im told is not extremely popular with men. anyway.

i recently met a guy 1 year younger than me who works in the same profession but is only just starting, in contrast to me being a bit of a bitter old veteran. ive been kind to him as one is to new people, and hes been slightly smitten with me as a result, if i dare guess so. we went out for drinks a few times, he seems sweet, kind and doesnt harbor any extremist political beliefs (its important to me not to date fascist-sympathisers). thats all very nice but unfortunately he doesnt exactly look very attractive to me. i feel good around him bc he is kind and lovely but i think i have too much edge and that he couldnt handle my darker sides (lots of cynism, LOTS) bc he is sich a sweet summer child. and i also feel that i havent yet lived wildly and slept around and experienced all the instant gratification options life has to offer, definitelly not enough to just drop everything and consider a serious relationship with someone who doesnt feel like ive won the dating lottery (its bc of certain personal problems hes told me of having, and its bc of the looks. im an impossibly visually-oriented person. and shallow.)

so i am very tempted to slowly explore this and the options it could offer (for example a serious relationship) but i also feel like i might be setting myself up for failure and him for a lot of heartbreak. whatever should i do?

until now ive only ever continued dating people i was really attracted to... sometimes despite their dubious political beliefs. so actually this might be the new strategy that would yield positive results, dating someone for their impeccable moral standards and kindness rather than a pronounced jawline. (am i, deep down, really that shallow?)

this got long and tedious, i wont blame you if you chuck it in the bin instead of reading and answering. maybe all i needed was to write it out. might need to use my journal bit more often.

thank you for your time and efforts in any case. take care!💕

Hi love! Thanks for your kind words and support. Firstly, from how you describe yourself, I could totally see us being friends – we seem to have similar beliefs, values, and priorities when it dating comes to dating (no fascists allowed, career-oriented, endless cynicism, and making a pronounced jawline a top criterion of a date night lol).

Here's my take – given the information you so kindly and vulnerably shared with me:

If you're still single, there's no reason to make the prospect of dating (generally or casually dating a specific person) into a black-and-white experience. You can casually date as many people as you would like until you mutually decide to be exclusive with someone. Think of dating as a networking experience: It's a chance to meet and connect with various types of people. They can become (business or pleasure, in this case) partners, friends, acquaintances, or connectors to others who will soon become members of your close inner circle (maybe even a further partner or spouse – who knows!).

You can decide to date different people for different reasons. Sometimes, you just want good conversation and decide later that you're better off as friends. Exploring the emotional intimacy aspect of a relationship with someone of the gender you're attracted to can teach you a lot about yourself and the type of partner you ultimately want to end up with – even if you don't ever kiss, let alone sleep together. Just make sure, in this case, to share that you only have a platonic connection with him before he gets too invested. Being selfish when dating is essential, but never be cruel and lead people on.

Suppose you want to see where this connection goes, without commitment. In that case, you can always indulge in casual sex with others you are physically attracted to and only go on dates with this man in a more casual dating/companionship way.

I don't think it is shallow to not want to date someone you're not physically/sexually attracted to. Unfortunately, in our current society, you wouldn't even need to question this if you were a man. There are plenty of people we really like and are emotionally attracted to in this life but have no sexual feelings towards – we call them friends.

While it could take some time to find a partner with who you're compatible in every major area, consider how much longer this process would take if you settle with men you have no true interest in before you inevitably break up with them because you're unhappy in the relationship? Staying single until your values align and mutually want rip each others' clothes off every time you see each other in the beginning stages of dating is the best strategy – in my opinion at least. It is better to be technically alone than lonely in a committed relationship. You deserve nothing but the best. Never settle for less. Keep your standards high to maintain your most valuable assets: Your happiness, success, and peace of mind.

Hope this helps xx

#dating advice #dating tips #dating #sex and relationships #relationship advice #life advice #relationships #self discovery #life design #femme fatale #dark femininity #dark feminine energy #girl advice #dream girl #it girl #high value woman #high value mindset #female excellence #the feminine urge #level up #personal growth #higher self #self confidence #self concept #success mindset #glow up #girl blogging #femmefatalevibe

[kathrynalicemc]

A/N: Here we are! The Valhalla fic at last! I decided I would post this on Dafne's birthday because if I didn't, I'd probably never post it. Im maybe just over half way actually writing it so therefore I am going to be releasing these every second week. That way I still have time to finish writing while still doing uni. This second semester is a bit lighter and shouldn't require as many essays so hopefully I can finish. If not, maybe ill take a mid story break and continue in the summer. I am expecting 10ish chapters but it could be one or two more. Also: IMPORTANT NOTE! Each chapter will have a companion piece in the form of a song. It is heavily recommended you listen to it before/during/after reading as each song inspired the chapter or vice versa. I technically also have posted this prologue before but it was a year ago and ive fixed it up since! Enjoy <3

Warnings: This story is going to be very high fantasy and self indulgent. I know its set around 2020 I think but it wont be very modern LOL. Occasional shitty writing. No legit content warnings for now but expect fight scenes later on.

Characters: Dafne Arcano

Song: Valhalla Calling - Miracle of Sound

---------------------------------------------------------

Prologue: The Call

It began with a crack of lightning, brilliant and blue, lighting up the darkness around her. A second later came the sharp crack of thunder in reply. It rumbled seemingly in every direction, slowly fading into the black void all around her.

Dafne inhaled as she steadied her nerves and clenched her fists.

“Where am I?” The words echoed into nothing, small ripples of water radiated out from her boots and disappeared into the darkness.

Another flash of lightning. Then another. And another. Dafne instinctually brought up her arm to shield her eyes from the light. The ground quaked beneath her feet and reverberated up her legs to her chest. One final crash of lightning lit up the darkness and then everything fell to silence. It stretched on for what seemed like a lifetime and yet just a few heartbeats.

She uncovered her eyes and glanced up, her breath catching in her chest. Before her, growing up from the darkness below, towered an inky black jagged mountainscape backlit by a faint white glow. A swift rapid of rushing water fell from the top and crashed down to the black ground, foaming and sending waves out that turned into gentle ripples by the time they reached Dafnes feet.

A low resonant horn broke the silence from deep within the mountain itself. It almost seemed to call her as if her soul was remembering a memory from long ago.

The waterfall suddenly parted and a stampede of riders shot out, hooves thundering and kicking up a spray of water. Looking closely, Dafne noticed each rider had a shield upon their back. There were three different crests, one of them being the Arcano family crest she was familiar with. A second shield featured the Varangr crest, one she knew of but didn’t encounter often as they lived in solitude on Svalbard. The third was a complete mystery to her. Dafne of course knew about the tale of the three brothers splitting off into their own families but the third family had long since died out, their name and crest lost to time.

These must be the Valkyries her grandfather told stories about. The female members of the three families that had the Gift whose job was to guard and protect the ancient wizard city of Valhalla. Dafnes chest ached as she watched visions of her long since passed ancestors ride off to battle, wishing she could be among the shieldmaidens.

As the last rider vanished into the void, so too did the image of the mountain. All was quiet.

Suddenly, the sky above her erupted into a dancing aurora borealis. Colors of blue and green blazed before her eyes, folding and swirling against the deep indigo sky. The silence was broken by the astonished laughter of Dafne, a sound that very rarely is heard by anyone.

Whirling around to catch every glimpse of it that she could, her eyes caught the shape of a dark figure just a few feet away from her. The figure was tall and imposing, yet her face displayed wisdom and kindness. Her long strawberry blonde hair curled and went past her waist. In that moment, Dafne’s love and obsession for history paid off. She knew based on the tunic and furs that adorned her body that this woman was ancient, probably from the age of Vikings. The woman smiled gently and then three men with similar facial features faded into existence behind her. It was clear that these were her sons.

From the sons, another line of ancestors appeared behind them. Then another. And another. The entire horizon before her stood endless generations of ancestors going back hundreds of years until they disappeared from view into the dark.

One after another they all started to speak. The words were familiar but lost on her at first. Slowly they began to get closer and closer to being recognizable. Eventually she could start to pick out some words she understood from within an avalanche of sound.

“Find us”

“Help us”

“Save us”

“Free us”

The woman in front of her leaned forward, her face inches from Dafne. She placed her hand upon Dafne’s shoulder and then spoke.

“Wake up”

#hpma #magic awakened #Valhalla #dafne arcano #Valhalla fic #Prologue: The Call

[kage-no-sonzai]

Stammering Awareness Day Post

I missed Stammering Awareness Day this year because I was at a Sales Conference for work so here's my belated post.

"Therapy. It's not right for everyone"

I made a very similar decision to Paul Gaskin when I turned 18 and moved away to university. I was in a different city, far away from my parents, with nobody I knew. Away from every comfortable thing possible to hide behind. So I thought fuck it. I will not do this anymore.

Speech therapy is often not a choice for children like me.

I have stammered since the day I started talking, late, at age three. And even then my first word was 'no'. A testament perhaps to the personality that was hidden for years and years beneath the appearance of someone who was 'shy' or 'withdrawn'.

I did not speak between the ages of 3 and 14 in school. And if I did, they were one word answers. I am surrounded by memories of school reports my mum's kept with the teacher's feedback, 'she's quiet in the classroom, she should put her hand up more' or 'she'd be a clever girl if she wasn't so quiet'.

In those formative years, I had few, if any friends. And at the age I am now I realise just how damaging that is to someone. In uni, I didn't go to fresher's week, I rarely came out my room and I found myself emotionally and socially exhausted just because I walked through the kitchen to wash my pots and one of my flatmates was there trying to chat.

What has speech therapy ever done for me, if it hasn't helped me socialise and become the kind of person who just speaks without thought?

Speech therapy, in my case, was not to try and make my life better. It was to try and hammer the stammer out of me by any means necessary. I even kept the folder, which I found recently.

I missed out on classes and break times in Primary School, because I had Speech Therapy, organised by my school. And I remember feeling confused, when at the age of 8, one such speech therapist decided that my stammer was so bad, she sent me back to class, with an A4 sheet of paper. 'A-Z, Sign Language'.

I've never seen my mum so livid.

The ones who came after weren't as bad. But they never felt less patronising. They would put cards in front of me and say 'this is how you say this word correctly'. I know how to say the word, and correctly as well. Just not in the manner they wanted. Not in the way that proved to my parents, that all this therapy, all this money, was working.

Every day, I'd still come home with a stammer.

At age 13, I was gifted a device, called a VoiceAmp. A company now who doesn't operate. It was a small MP3-like device that fed my voice back into one ear, half a second later, at a higher pitch. And it worked mostly.

The teacher's knew about it. Let me use it. And I thought that maybe, maybe, it would be alright. I loathed having to carry it around with me everywhere, but it was something.

Until one day, class hadn't even begun yet, when a teacher berated me in the hallway for 'listening to music'.

And whatever confidence was built. Was shattered.

Around the same age, I found my passion, languages. I did German before, yes, but this was Japanese. This was different. Difficult. 3 alphabets, thousands of characters, fast-paced speaking?

I don't know why I really kept on at it.

It is the only GCSE I ever got an A* in.

It is the only time, I ever really truly felt supported by a teacher, and she didn't even teach at my school. She paid for my GCSE, out of her own pocket, because she saw how much I loved it.

Of course. My parents saw this and thought 'oh all that speech therapy worked, she loves languages'. When that's not entirely true.

I struggled, mentally I now know, throughout the entirety of my school life, extending into Sixth Form. Wondering, 'where am I going to fit in the real world? Who in their right mind is going to hire someone who, yes, speaks, reads, writes Japanese, but can't even say their own name without tripping over the syllables?'.

Having completed my first year at uni, something loomed in second year. My Year Abroad to Japan.

I was fucking terrified.

But I'm alive, I made it! But that, I believe was the turning point. That I was forced into situations that were uncomfortable, forced into speaking a different language to people who realistically had never seen anyone who wasn't Japanese before. And fuck yes it was awkward sometimes but when I came back to the UK, I felt totally different.

I felt that I could do this, without having my parent's hanging over me, waiting to detect the tiniest block, the smallest of repetitions, just so they could be all smug and say 'well that speech therapy was useless, you're not even using it'.

I felt like I could be a person, make my own decisions and do what I want. And with that freedom, it became less and less about my stammer and more about me.

That is why this TedTalk by Paul Gaskin, resonates with me.

I've had speech therapy, breathing exercises, coping mechanisms. I've had devices, sign language, even a band tied around my chest to control my breathing (which bloody hurt btw cos I had tits coming in).

Nothing works better, than just, letting go.

I am not cured. I never will be. I still stammer. And it's worse on some days, some weeks, more than others.

But that is not my problem.

It is the way I speak.

Stammering cannot be hammered out of a child, an adult. My parents could have flung all the speech therapy at me and it would not have changed a thing. But why does it need to be hammered out? Sure it might hurt my parents to watch me struggle, but how do they thing I feel?

Years in silence, tripping over words, verbally and physically abused, out of breath, facial ticks. It hurts me more than it hurts them.

I don't know if my stammer is neurological but does it matter? It's here now, and it's not going anywhere, contrary to popular belief. I'm still allowed to be frustrated, saddened and put down sometimes by it, because it's something that's been with me from day one.

That doesn't mean I've taken a step back.

My pictures above, refer to a moment, a pivotal one, where I was first aware I was different. It was a new school, and we were all introducing ourselves. And when I stammered, everyone laughed at me. And too anxious to cry outwardly, I stuffed my head into my jumper and cried as quietly as I could, until the class was over.

They're important pictures to keep, I think. To remind me of the little girl I was. I like to think I've made her proud.

But I'm proud of her.

Not only because of all she went through.

But because, when asked by the speech therapist how we could realistically ease the bullying (something she probably shouldn't have been asking me anyway 🙄), she responded with this.

Sorry for the long post. I need to get this off my chest every few years (and it's my blog I do what I like, jokes on you for reading this far lol).

Next year I hope to attend my first Stamma Fest. If this topic is something you've never thought about or something that interests you, I highly suggest you check out the Stamma website.

Thank you for coming to my (not) TedTalk.

#stammering #stuttering #stamma #stammering awareness day #Youtube

[mmushroomwriter]

ONE YEAR OF PFTET

(sorry for this mess of a post, I promise I'll put out something better/more about the actual project soon, I just wanted to put out this more personal message first. I know the formatting is dodgy and it may not all entirely make sense, but it comes straight from the heart/sleep-deprived mind. I might take this down and re-write it tomorrow later today it's the early hours of the morning when I inevitably re-read it and cringe, but for now, here it is)

So turns out I missed the one-year anniversary (January 14th), so well done me...

It's wild to think that I've now officially been working on pftet for over a year now. My life has changed so wildly and drastically over the 12-month span that it's almost hard to imagine where I was when I started it.

I haven't done as much in that time as I would've hoped at the beginning, but to be fair to myself, I don't think I could've imagined what an utterly chaotic mess 2022 ended up becoming for me. I've mentioned a few different things on here (the mess that moving flat became, getting covid, breaking my arm, etc.) but on top of those and just the impact they had on my life, there was a bit more behind the scenes, as well as uni and work (gross). Especially now as where I live is going through a cost-of-living crisis, it's not only been stressful as fuck, but I've had to start working even more frequently than before (both a blessing and a curse, as it means less time to write in general, but also I'm pretty sure all of my best moments of inspiration have come to me on my commute).

That's not to say I'm not still working on pftet, because I am. And even when I'm not actively writing, I'm constantly thinking about the characters and the world. I love this project, and I promise I'm not abandoning it - no matter how long I go between randomly popping up to answer questions that have been in my ask box for several months. The unfortunate truth is just that, at least at the moment, I need to prioritise some other stuff - namely work and my health (although, touch wood, my health hasn't had any major blows since my arm in May).

However, I do promise that in 2023 I will (at least try my best to) be more active than last year. At the very least, assuming there aren't any wild unforeseen circumstances, I promise not to disappear without a trace for basically three months! Who knows? Maybe the fact that I've had to deal with all this wild shite in 2022 means I'll be able to handle it better in 2023.

Anyway, this has been long and I've said a lot of nothing, I just thought that my spotty appearances necessitated some sort of explanation. You guys deserve that.



The main thing, though, is that I want to say thank you. Thank you to everyone who's ever shown any interest in the dumb things my brain spouted one day and spiralled into this weird story about growing up and feeling as though the world is ending (and realising that it actually might be!) I don't think I'll ever be able to properly express my gratitude. Every single notification I get makes me grin stupidly, and I'm still mind-blown every time someone sends in an ask. I'm going to do a proper post more about thanking you all soon, maybe include a contest of some sort, I'm not entirely sure yet, but keep an eye out.



TLDR:

2022 was a shit show, but I'm hoping to get (at least a little bit) more on track and be active far more frequently. Thank you all so much for caring about pftet so far, and here's to the future!

#love you all and thank you <3 #make sure to take care of yourselves!!! #mushsaysthings #behind the scenes #2023 #pftet #playlistsfortheendtimes

[blueberry-beanie]

Glass Animals at Columbiahalle Berlin | 5th September 2022

It’s been a while since the concert and I haven’t managed to write down my experiences yet. Glass Animals have been on my list for quite a while and I had wanted to buy a ticket months ago. Unfortunately, I had to pull off a last minute stunt with an Ebay purchase instead because I wasn’t sure if I would be moving places or working on this day.

The journey to Berlin went surprisingly smoothly, although I took a Flixbus this time due to the insane prices for the train. I arrived at the hostel a bit too early, so I took a walk around the local neighbourhood, found some vegan fast food and strolled through the Mauerpark. It was a gorgeous sunny day - perfect to go exploring.

I soon got reminded that Berlin and me are not best friends though, when I got lost completely and could not find the tram stop Google told me was just in front of my nose. It turns out my phone was having issues with location services these days - a bad timing.

At around 3 pm I checked in at the hostel. To my surprise, the guy at the reception used to go to the same uni I am supposed to start at. The world is small. Another surprise was the big and tidy, but completely empty eight-bed-room. I took a shower, charged my phone and relaxed. At some point I figured I should go to the venue to arrive there shortly after 5 pm.

This time my calculations were wrong. Although there was still plenty of time to go til doors, there were already about 50 people. Something I instantly noticed was just how diverse the fans looked like. Many had colourful hair, unusual clothing and jewellery.

A guy in a transparent shirt sorted everyone according to their numbers on their hands, so I just waited until they were done and joined two nice girls from Poland. Olivia and Paulina came here together to only their second concert and were super sweet to talk to.

I was surprised just how many people kept arriving. Shortly before the doors were due to open, you could not even see the queue’s end anymore. Then everything happened really fast: Ticket check, security check - I noticed there was a second security check nobody seemed to use and quickly changed the lane. That turned out to be my saving grace - I made it to front row right, just as I wanted.

I can’t remember any concert venue filling up this quickly with so many people squished together just minutes after doors. It became difficult to go to the bathroom or get drinks just right away.

I was lucky to have nice people around me, although I sadly lost Olivia and Paulina. Later I spotted them somewhere in the middle, but they did not see me. Behind me Erik and Emilia, brother and sister, came together in self-made t-shirts and with a sign. Emilia wasn’t old enough to go alone so her brother accompanied her. They were really lovely and we had a good time waiting together.

The opening act Sable was not very good in my opinion, but maybe that was because I could barely hear what the singer was whispering into her microphone. The audience mostly loved them, though.

In the meantime Glass Animals used their Dreamland aesthetic to mess with us old style: The estimate on the Showtime.exe file download would change from anything between minutes and literal years. Good old times.

We could see Davey backstage all in white, pacing around and talking to people. At some point we waved at him and he waved back. At around 9 pm smeone put a pineapple onstage:

And then, a few minutes later, the fun finally started with them playing Life Itself. It became clear right away that this was not going to be a normal concert. Not only was Wavey Davey on fire, but so was the crowd. The venue was absolutely packed and everyone had decided to sing and cheer their hearts out. After every single song.

At some point we just wouldn’t stop cheering and Dave was in total disbelief about what was happening, just holding his head and saying “Wow, wow” repeatedly.

The band proceeded to churn out bangers the entire time. There was not one weak moment in the entire setlist. Everything was complimented by the wonderfully colourful visuals and the lights.

N had been teaching me all band members’ names, so I knew exactly it was Drew in front of me on guitar and piano. Well I needn’t have worried so much about telling him apart from Ed, because Dave made a point to introduce him at least three times before remembering the band consists of two more members.

I did see a lot of Drew and tried to take a few pictures of him showing off. The “physics prof” as N and I named him after one of her former teachers, wasn’t very much in teaching mode today. He was more busy showing off to everyone and enjoying the show.

Both Ed and Drew came to the front often and fans were cheering for them and even showing hearts. It was very sweet how the band interacted with the audience and with each other. It seemed to be one big and very hyped up family. Sadly, I could not see much of Joe, the drummer, because he was mostly hidden behind his drumkit from my point of view.

Unfortunately some light situations also made photos difficult, but it was anyway quite impossible to catch Dave in motion. He is a human bouncy ball, constantly jumping and dancing around, and never being too much out of breath to not deliver stellar vocals.

Dave made all of us anticipate his little kiss during Space Ghost and it was honestly hillarious how everyone was cheering for that. During Gooey he came to the barrier and sang directly in front of some overjoyed fans. But for Pork Soda, he gave the pinapple to the very tall girl next to me.

Truly, no throwing, very careful giving instead. The lucky girl was dancing with the pineapple for the entire song. Too soon it was time for the encore with Tokyo Drifting and, of course, Heat Waves. I decided to let Emilia to the front for her favourite song, and it was definitely a good decision and made her very happy. 

The last song was completely euphoric with everyone singing their hearts out. Too soon, the concert was over and we all had to go from Dreamland back to our ordinary lives.

Although my journey back to the hostel went very smoothly, the next day already started from the wrong foot. First thing in the morning, my USB cable disintegrated and I was left with 20 percent charge. So I went on a stressed odyssey to find vegan breakfast and a cable.

This made me really anxious and by the time I finally found sth to eat and a new cable at Alexanderplatz, I already used up much of my mental capacity for that day. I had really wanted to go to the Pergamon Museum for many years and somehow it had never worked out.

This day I was greeted by some security guy straight out of a movie in black sunglasses and wordlessly thrown off the property. Some weird barriers and building sites and the security guys made me really anxious together with the general aloofness on the Museumsinsel with its huge, palace-like buildings.

I decided it was not good to push myself any further because it's not a thing to go to the museum crying. So I headed to Brandenbuger Tor, which is already familiar to me, with the goal to go and explore the Tiergarten. What could possibly go wrong? A big, peaceful park for me to calm down and regain my mental strength.

Well, no. At some point two grown men approached me with some piece of paper in their hand and broken english and they would not back off even when I said no repeatedly, instead following me and invading my space really closely until I had to yell for them to leave me alone.

This left me crying somewhere in the bushes and I did not really get better even when N called me to calm me down. Wanting to sit on a bench for a while to regain composure, a poor unknowing fella came and asked me politely to sit next to me. I took my backpack and left him baffled and feeling sorry, but I was just crying again.

Things only started getting better when I arrived at another familiar place, the Hauptbahnhof, and went to Vapiano to get some food. The familiar environment helped keeping me stable and I decided to head for the central bus station a bit sooner and go explore a nearby park with a lake.

It was very beautiful and finally nobody bothered me, so the journey home actually went very smoothly once again. Finally at home, I was overjoyed to get into bed and feel safe and comfortable.

This should have been the end of the story, but it isn’t completely. A few days later, I started editing the photos from the concert and post them on instagram. Honestly, I did not expect or want much, but the fan base just blew me away completely. People would not stop sharing, complimenting and even messaging me with requests to draw the photos or use them as their phone background.

Especially Drew got a lot of love from the fans. But then Ed shared my photos of him and my inbox really exploded with notes and even fans excitedly congratulating me with being noticed by a band member. I have honestly never once seen fans this committed to include everyone and share art and photos. It made me feel very welcome.

Dreamland in real life may have ended, but I’m looking forward to the band’s next project and I really hope to see them again soon.

#glass animals #ga berlin #dave bayley #drew macfarlane #edmund irwin singer #joe seaward #dreamland #my concerts #my photo

[hidiu]

i've had a tough week at uni, i'm still taking final papers and exams. not finished yet, but i went back and watched the series and fragments and i have a question what's going on in yargi?

i'm not taking this study out anymore, so here's a few words about what i think of the latest developments in this series.

ceylin. she is my comfortable character, my favorite character and in general i just love to think about her personality and actions. her attempt to send parla abroad and lie to ilgaz is not the best decision she could have made. but i am not going to judge her for that. i don't condone her, but i do understand. somewhere in episode 10 she talks about the way she is: choosing what seems right and beneficial to her at the time; not wanting to be judged for those choices. she thinks about the future and says something like "i won't stop, he won't change. trouble will knock on our doors again and we can't handle it". that's exactly what's happening now.

i don't agree that her character has no development. ceylin has never received professional psychological help in all her time. if you have never dealt with psychological problems, then i can only congratulate you. sometimes people cannot change just because they want to. sometimes it takes years of work with a therapist. ilgaz is very good, but he is not a universal pill that can cure all of ceylin's psychological problems just by love. that is not how it works.

ceylin has a huge amount of trauma related to family. she became the backbone of this family very early on, working 2 jobs to support inji's studies. being the sister of a mother who lost a child. replacing the mother for parla. and replacing the father for them all. she is not separated from her family. she cannot say "no" to them and is willing to give them everything, even at the cost of her own life and marriage.

her family is manipulative. aylin blackmailed ceylin with her own suicide. everyone remember ceylin's breakdown in the middle of the night when she thought her mother wasn't breathing? i was once blackmailed with the death of a family member too, it has a nightmarish effect on a person.

ceylin tried to do what she thought was right. how others react to her action is their decision. life is not a straight line. the show needed this situation because you can't hide the problem under kisses and hugs, even though they are sincere, and think it will go away on its own. they have to figure it out.

me personal opinion: teenagers should be held accountable. they are involved in drug trafficking, mafia activities, and eventually murder. it's time for them to think about what they are doing.

opinion #2: the adults should answer as well. the idiots who took the lynching. even if they went to serdar, they could have called the police a hundred times on the way. they could have called the police and ambulance later. but yes, team cleanup after the murder is clearly better.

i am sad for both ilgaz and ceylin. they are very unlucky with their families.

yekta. my favorite annoying yekta. sooner or later karma will catch up with him. he might be the victim from the 6 month arc.

yekta's son is very strange, i don't have an opinion on him yet.

pars and derya. i really liked pars wedding proposal. it's a very beautiful monologue and far from corny as i expected. that scene is very nice, really. waiting very much for their wedding.

that's it for now. i'm really looking forward to the episode on sunday and hope i can watch it live. i'll get back to writing "1095 days for you" in the new year, now i have absolutely no resources for either the fluff of the first chapters or the angst of the last one.

enjoy the show. discussions are great (it means sema and the whole team are doing a good job and we have something to discuss), but don't take it personally. i believe everything will be solved. thanks for reading it, btw.

#yargı #yargi #turkish series #ilcey

[abyssal-ali]

Yet Forgives the Butcher's Knife

This fills the second day's prompt: College (albeit quite briefly, but this was written before I planned to enter this event, so go me for having such foresight that AYFTBK needed barely any tweaking at all!)

Disclaimer: This follows Canon events up to a point, but since DC has the inability to stick to one timeline or version of events without retconning it, I'm taking liberties with some plot points. (Canon-complicit to a point)

Rating: T TW: none? Violence lite, perhaps

Prologue Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4

Stephanie thanked Leslie for all her care and told the doctor she was leaving to start her second life afresh. She promised to keep in touch and zipped up her duffle.

Steph and Jason flew to Oxford, England, where Jason attended uni for Lit and medical classes and Steph trained to become LoA material. The apartment Jason had asked Talia to obtain had the usual suit, weapons, training area, booby traps, etc, plus a special surprise. Steph dumped her purple duffle on the coffee table and dodged a strike, rolling to her feet and pulling escrima on her assailant. Jason rolled his eyes and greeted her casually. “Hey, T.”

Steph looked at the choreographed fight-dance of Jason and whom she now realized was his mom, admiring their fluid, well-practiced moves that she aspired to. Jason finally pinned Talia and helped her up.

“Why're you here, T?”

“I came to see my son and daughter-in-law, of course, and to make sure you haven't slacked off just because you're in love.”

Jason and Steph coughed and blushed heavily, having not said those words yet.

Talia smirked and nodded at Jason. “I approve. She is not up to recruits' level 3 yet, but she shows promise. Good job avoiding my opening blow, Stephanie. Your observational skills and instincts are quite honed.”

“Oh, thank you? J's been running me pretty hard, but I've been improving, so I'm glad it's not just in my head,” she laughed awkwardly.

“I am here to train you while Jason is in class,” announced Talia. “I will be here for two weeks. When I return to Nanda Parbat, you are welcome to come with me.”

~♡~

Steph didn't return with Talia, but she and Jason did visit the fortress a couple times. Jason got Slade Wilson to train her for a while, and the mercenary liked her because she reminded him of his daughter Rose. A few of his other friends/trainees agreed to help her as well, and she was able to take Jason down at least 50% of the time by Jason's graduation 2 years later. As well as the physical training, Jason refined Steph's already quite-honed stealth skills, plus hacking, stalking, mental boundaries and a couple languages. She could now speak English, French, Swahili, Mandarin, and Russian. For fun, he taught her a couple motorcycle stunts and weapons tricks to intimidate low-level opponents. She got upgraded Official Robin Training she'd missed.

Over the two years, the couple had planned their steps once leaving Oxford well. They headed to Hong Kong to collect the gear Talia had provided and finalize the details.

Red Hood made an appearance in Gotham 18 months ago, sniping the Joker and ensuring he was cremated. It was quick, quiet, and clean, so there should be no trace of him, but if there was, only his shiny red helmet would be visible. No other traces were left.

In Hong Kong, Jason and Stephanie headed to the safehouse/penthouse Talia had secured. Steph went out to get groceries while Jason checked over everything, especially the new suits for Red Hood and Indigo. The design was modified from the League's uniforms enough that it wouldn't tip off the Bats but still kept its functionality.

Steph got the fresh food and headed home when she heard fighting coming from an alley. She hid the groceries under a piece of wood and hurried to help. A young Chinese-American girl about her and Jay's age was fluidly fighting off eight gang members. Steph paused a moment to appreciate the girl's style (Steph was now a top ninja, but this girl's moves were something else) which reminded her of Lady Shiva's, before rushing two goons and knocking them out cold. Once all were unconscious Steph wiped her hands on her jeans and turned to the girl.

“Neihhou, I'm Steph. Nice moves...why were you fighting them?” she said in slow Cantonese, unsure which languages the girl spoke.

“Neihhou...m goi," she answered even slower, bowing slightly, but Steph was pretty sure it was from politeness, not an injury.

The girl began making signs slowly, explaining that the goons were traffickers who'd made the horrible decision to attempt to kidnap her. Steph grabbed the girl's hand and dragged her to Jason, stopping to collect the groceries on the way.

Jason looked up and did a double-take when he saw Steph wasn't alone. “Steph...”

“She fights similarly to Shiva and I thought she was almost kidnapped so I jumped in and took her home. She prefers sign or body language, I think,” Steph announced.

Jason looked the girl up and down. “Do you know Lady Shiva?”

The girl looked between Jason and Steph. “Mom.”

Jason and Steph exchanged glances. “Lady Shiva is your mother? Who's your father, then?”

“David Cain.”

“Are you an assassin?” Jason signed as he spoke, hoping she knew ASL.

She shook her head emphatically. “No. I don't want...hurt people...Innocents...David made...me kill...once...I ran... Five years.”

“Do you have a name?” asked Steph.

“One Who Is All,” replied the girl. “No name. Title. Bodyguard.”

“You need a name!” said Jason immediately. “You read body language, right? I heard stories about you. You predict moves like Sandra?”

The girl nodded slowly.

“So you're a prophetess...Cassandra? Cassandra was a Greek prophetess cursed to have nobody believe her. What do you think?”

(Nerd, thought Steph lovingly. But my nerd.)

“Cass,” said the girl definitively.

“Cass it is!” said Steph.

“Oh, this is Jason, my husband, and I'm Steph.”

Cass decided to stay with them and Talia quickly had a suit in her size prepared.

~♡~

The suit was hand-delivered by a grumpy baby assassin, Jason's little brother Damian. He was 10 and far too old to need babysitters, but Talia had deemed the League too unsafe for him now and knew 3 of the world's top fighters would protect him better than she at present. She had considered sending him to Bruce, but even a Wayne was too much too much attention, and Damian popping out of the woodwork would cause too much scrutiny, so his brother and sister-in-law it was! He brought his suit along with him, plus a suitcase full of weapons.

~♡~

Steph and Jason finally arrived in Gotham, with double the passengers and load they'd expected. Luckily, all were ninja and so packed lightly—the majority of the luggage was weapons and ninja gear, anways. The base of the quartet's operations was in the Narrows area, underneath a building owned by Stephanie (under a pseudonym, of course). The sub-level BOOP had 3 layers:

1) garage, vigilante stuff, tech centre, etc.

2) training area/gym/mini-hospital and lab

3) living quarters.

Stephanie and Jason were absolutely not going to allow Damian to join them on the streets, but compromised by letting him run the comms, since he was quite good with tech—he could probably give Babs a run for her money, Jason decided. He and Steph took turns teaching Damian (and Cass, since she sat in) since he couldn't attend normal school, at least not in his fresh-from-a-murder-cult state. The subjects were higher-level and more varied than public schools' as well. Everyone also learned ASL so Cass could communicate with them more comfortably.

Once the 4 were settled in Gotham, Jason began his plan.

Stephanie had decide that she couldn't kill, (unless maybe in self-defense, but she had enough training that she shouldn't be in that position, anyways), but she sure didn't say no to Jason taking Black Mask out for her.

Cass had sworn to never kill again and frowned when Jason and Steph told her their plan, but once Jason's PowerPoint was over and she saw how victims—including Steph—relaxed when their [family's] murderer, kidnapper, rapist, etc was gone for good, she saw their point of view snd accepted their stance.

With Sionis out of the way, Red Hood stepped in and took over Gotham's underworld. One duffle bag left quite a first impression and there wasn't too much rebellion after that. Most people preferred Red Hood to Black Mask—he actually protected people, so crime was at an all-time low, especially violent crime; kids weren't allowed to buy/ run drugs or work for any criminals, so fewer kids died in gang disputes; Hood took care of the street kids and working women, making them the safest they'd ever been; he controlled all of Gotham's drugs, so there were fewer gang/turf wars, “cut” drugs, bad deals, etc. And the final straw: Hood cared. He was one of them—there was no mistaking his (played-up) Park Row accent. His lieutenants Indigo and Orphan were intimidating but Indy had a Narrows accent too and Orphan was very protective of hurt children and innocents. Almost everyone in Gotham was beyond satisfied with their new prince.

~♡~

Jason and Steph suited up for the night, Cass staying behind for a night off. The base layer of all their uniforms was plain black cotton long-sleeved T-shirts, leggings, and socks. Next came the Kevlar-weave tunics, high-necked and dropping to their thighs. Black bindings wrapped around their wrists and forearms and calves-down, past their heavy-duty steel-toed boots. Red Hood wore dark grey cargo pants, while Indigo's and Orphan's were black. Indigo and RH both wore kevlar-weave hoods with red/purple lining, red/purple-tinted goggles, and a red/purple mask from nose to chin for filtering air and adding another layer of ID security, as voice modulators and rebreathers were built in. The goggles were connected to Ghoul's computers and could call up maps, files, etc., while the comms were built into the goggles and masks. RH, I, and O all had utility belts with grapples; smoke bombs/pellets; shuriken, etc; snacks; paper & pen, etc. Red Hood had the most guns, but Indy and Orphan also carried a pistol and rubber bullets. (Think this design [+sleeves] for Jason and a similar one in purple for Steph.)

As well as his Jericho .941's, Hood carried a variety of knives, small missiles, and a strap for his dual swords, but he didn't wear them unless he was trying to make an impression.

Indigo carried knives and small missiles, plus escrima on her back and a bō on her belt.

Orphan preferred intimidation (and went out the least, or stayed on Hood and Indy's six) and if she did fight, favoured hand-to-hand, but she carried a knife and a bō just in case, plus the pistol. Orphan didn't like Hood and Indy's hoods as they restricted her vision, which was her primary sense considering her specialty (Hood and Indy were good enough the handicap didn't affect them). She had a full-face kevlar-weave covering (with breathing spaces, duh) and a haphazardly-stitched mouth. (Cass's outfit)

Unsurprisingly, she didn't get to fight many criminals—most fainted. Ghoul did have a suit for if he was needed in an emergency -a mini-version of the others'- but in deep green. Crime Alley was slowly losing its nickname.

~♡~

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