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hauntedpearl · 4 days

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s12 destiel from dean's perspective is explanation enough for why dean is sooooo insane after that season. like.

- first he almost kills himself for the greater good or whatever and has to come to terms with like. dying. on purpose. and then he is given the gift of life but before he can be like yay! i can go home! his mom is back from the dead??? and his brother is missing???

- then his mom leaves him bc she wants to figure out who she is and even tho he's like a 38 yo man it fucks w him a lot understandably.

-they get arrested and put in SOLITARY for a while and when they finally get out and meet cas again (at which point dean has once again come to terms with dying for the greater good but also mostly his mom and brother this time), he KILLS THE REAPER THEY MADE THE DEAL WITH AND GETS ALL EMOTIONAL??? after which he proceeds to fuck off bc he is Busy™ tracking lucifer etc.,

- then they get a lead and CAS ALMOST DIES IN FRONT OF HIS EYES and throws an I love you in his goodbye speech for the lolz. which. hahaha. anyway cas lives but turns out his mother — with whom he's trying to connect so badly so he can achieve full Normalcy — was like. lowkey responsible for his almost death. so they're fighting now.

- cas receives a divine voicemail from his close friend and colleague and then they go on that case with Lily sunder and ISHIM BEATS CAS UP AND THREATENS TO KILL HIM and even after they beat him Lily Sunder is like. I'm gonna go do some soul searching and if im in the mood I'll come back and KILL YOU. THREAT. and cas is like 😔 fair. so you know.

- there is also an instance of him losing his memories which is scary. and it's like. being intimately familiar with that experience is. something else. as a memory loss girlie let me tell you 👍🏽😄

- and then!!!!! lucifer's unborn child mind melds with his wifehusband — once more in front of his own two eyes — and "manipulates" him into running away with the pregnant lady instead of staying and Figuring Out A Solution. and when they finally do find cas, they are with them for all of 12 hours before HE DIES. FORREAL THIS TIME. AND LIKE THAT'S IT. NO COMING BACK FROM THAT ONE!

this is not an exhaustive list bc i don't remember everything but. like you know. he was primed to get worse and worse. all things that happen in s12 are out of his control but they are also things that happen in front of his eyes, and in ways that make him think that perhaps he did have control over them and he did fuck up some way and he *should* have done something to change the course of their lives so he's filled with guiltshame about it. and he decides that the solution to not losing anyone in the foreseeable future is to just. Control Every Possible Aspect Of Their Existence. which is impossible and that's why he gets mad all the time but YOU KNOW. YOU CAN SEE WHY HE'S CRAZY. poor s12 dean man.

#doe is talking again #just thinking thoughts #i MISS S12 BTW #EVERYTHING WAS SOOOO RIGHT #and then </3 #also this is my bias against s13 showing bc i think it's STUPID #thete i said it idc about narrative importance s13 commits the worst crime of all: its boring as shit #and yeah I've only watched it once but i hated having yo watch it and supernatural WAS my favourite show back then even!!#snd an excuse to spend time with my v close friend!!! SO !!! EVEN THAT couldn't make s13 worth the time 😔#im also not a big fan of first half of s14 while we're at it.#i think it picks up in the second half thk when thsy start doinf family drama #anyway #ANYWAYSSSS #this is not meta or analysis im just thinking about s12 dean my baby #suicide ment

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cas-is-my-weakness · 22 days

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Queer Castiel is not open to interpretation

Seeing the poll about dean being bi getting so much attention and interest from you all. I thought why not do a Queer Cas poll. It is canon that cas is indifferent to all sexual orientation but him being an angel doesn't mean cas cannot be queer that is a wildly atrocious comment I have seen in this fandom. This is also unrelated directly to destiel although cas had the strongest relationship with dean in the show, but cas is queer regardless of whether dean reciprocates or not in canon. That is another discussion. Anyway this is the positive queer space and it is good to discuss about representation.

If you have any other moments in your mind other than those in the options please comment below I would like to know more about it. So vote for fun.

**Note please scroll past and dni if you think cas is not queer because sorry to tell you, you might be homophobe to deny literal canon queer main character.

These are my other polls -

Dean is bi poll

Dean's interests

Castiel's interests

#cas is queer #gay #destiel #misha collins #spn polls #supernatural #15x18 #castiel

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soullessjack · 7 months

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to me one of the most fucked up things about godjack and that whole “oh Cas and jack are doing excel spreadsheets in heaven now isn’t that so silly” thing and whatever is like. why are you putting them back into the system that abused and manipulated them. cas was literally lobotomized and forced to kill fake deans numerous times to condition him back into being the blind soldier that angels are supposed to be. jack is considered an undesirable abomination by heaven and all of the original nephilim were basically culled from existence by the flood as a result of that undesirability, but at the same time he’s still powerful enough to be desired as a weapon and extorted as such. that’s totally not vaguely eugenicist! and like, both cas and jack were conditioned into doing horrible things by heaven, things that have left deep scarring on both their psyches and senses of worth. jack tortured and murdered another subset of undesirables, the nonbelievers, and the worst part is that he only did it because he thought he was making up for Mary. His guilt was extorted and weaponized and only led to more guilt. once he realized what he’d done.

cas was nearly complicit in the apocalypse and wholly the murder of Lily Sunder’s seven-something year old daughter, again bc she was an undesirable abomination much like Jack was . And he was conditioned into that complicity, tortured repeatedly into believing total complicity and faith in The Plan was Good, or not even good, just a vague and abstract version of justification. he declared war and committed genocide on half of his “siblings,” and comrades, because he was a soldier and war is his lifestyle and if he can find any justification for what he does he will do it and he was taught to value the end before examining the means by which he could get to it, because that’s how heavens system works. ironically I’d say it’s fairly close to Christian fundamentalism, but also capitalism and militarism as well.

Like oh hey, you were born into a corrupt system that raised you with no sense of free will, individuality, or personhood, and encouraged blind obedience and justification of everything in the name of some vague absolution? You belong to a specific group of individuals who are deemed undesirable by the system unless you can be extorted for its gain? Why don’t you just join it and perpetuate it with a few inconsequential changes instead of fully dismantling it because it’s corrupt by design!! yay silly spreadsheets !!!!!!

I know spn isnt trying to run heaven as any sort of actual system or commentary on real life systems, believe me i know it’s not good enough to do that, but even if you take away that lens of heaven and just focus on the face value show canon of what it did to Cas and jack.. it’s still so bleak

#I’ve been thinking about this forever #and especially now that I’m watching shiny happy people and seeing how Christian fundamentalism aand #and the way it melds with capitalism too. I’m seeing patterns . I know they aren’t there on purpose but god #spn #supernatural #jack kline #castiel #cas and jack #dadstiel #if I reach a little more I can connect Cas’ lobotomy to the systemic abuse of queer/mentally ill ppl in the past #the undesirables.#it’s just. ugh #spn angels #stuff #like am I crazy here . I’m crazy. im a crazy commie lol #but wow it’s just #Cas and jack both being canonically autistic too.. being undesirable in their own ways.. Do you see what I mean #lily sunder has some regrets #I’m lily sunders number one fan btw . love her

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hoziernaturalevents · 1 month

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Hoziernatural Recs: Rare Pairs

Sign-ups for the 2024 round of the Hoziernatural Multi-Ship Bang are open, and people will soon be working to create a whole new batch of Hoziernatural content! However, for those of you who would like something to read between now and posting, we have some recs to fill that need 💜

Everything listed below is a rare pair, but if you're a person of varied taste, then check out our Wincest, Destiel, and Gen/Character Study rec lists!

Honey, There Is No "Right" Way by @rauko-creates

Beta: @petrichoravellichor

Hozier Song: Someone New

Rating: Teen and Up

Word Count: 10,181

Pairing/s: Balthazar/Castiel, Past Castiel/Dean Winchester, Past Balthazar/Hannah

Warnings: Internalized Acephobia, Internalized Arophobia

Additional Tags: Ace!Castiel, Aro!Balthazar, Demiromantic!Cas, Demisexual!Balthazar, Queer Themes, Fluff and Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Best Friends, Friends to Lovers, Roommates AU, Domestic Fluff, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Sick Character

Summary:

“That’s not how you feel about her.”

“Castiel, that’s not how I’ve ever felt about anyone. This whole…” He waved a hand in the air and propped up against the arm of the couch, “in love business...it’s complete bollocks. If you ask me, people’ve just seen too many blasted movies, got so hopped up on the rush of getting to know someone that they think that's it, that’s love, but it isn’t. Love is…” He glanced down at Castiel. “Love is choosing the person you get on with best, someone you’re able to be mates with and that you find attractive. All this ‘romance’ rubbish is just propaganda.”

Castiel looked at his friend. He thought about the warm feeling that grew inside him when they were together, the way his heart beat just a little faster every time Balthazar was close. “Yes...perhaps you’re right.”

i prayed my mind be good to me by @withthekeyisking-writer

Hozier Song: In the Woods Somewhere

Rating: Mature

Word Count: 4,789

Pairing/s: Lucifer/Sam Winchester, Dean Winchester & Sam Winchester

Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Emotional Manipulation, Coercion, Conditioning, Stockholm Syndrome, Disordered Eating, Suicidal Thoughts, Victim Blaming

Additional Tags: Hallucination Lucifer, Post-Episode 7x15 Repo Man, Episode 7x17 The Born-Again Identity, Lucifer's Cage, Horsemen's Rings, Hurt Sam Winchester, Sam's Cage Trauma, Sleep Deprivation, Groping, Hand Jobs, Anal Sex

Summary:

"You know you want to, Sammy. You know you miss me. You know you should come get me out."

"No. No, that will never happen."

His hallucination hums, looking at him with dark eyes and something almost resembling pity. "Oh, Sam," he says. "Yes, it will."

Mid-Youth Crisis by @sunshine-zenith with art by @rauko-creates

Beta: @rauko-creates

Hozier Song: Jackie and Wilson

Rating: Teen and Up

Word Count: 9,162

Pairing/s: Rowena MacLeod/Mary Winchester, Dean Winchester & Mary Winchester, Castiel & Mary Winchester, Castiel/Dean Winchester, Lily Sunder & Kelly Kline

Warnings: Minor Blood/Injury, References to Past Character Death, Emotional Hurt/Comfort

Additional Tags: Oblivious Mary Winchester, Humor and Fluff, Finding New Love

Summary: Resurrected and thrust into a strange modern world, Mary finds herself frustratingly connecting with a certain red-haired witch. After watching Cas decide to fall to be with her son Dean, Mary starts to wonder: is she happy? WAS she ever happy? Does her chance at happiness happen to lie in an unexpected place?

Someone New by @nickelkeep with art by @deancodedcastielenby

Beta: @iambiowaresbitch

Hozier Song: Someone New

Rating: Explicit

Word Count: 11,647

Pairing/s: Cain/Castiel/Benny Lafitte/Dean Winchester

Warnings:No Major Content Warnings

Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Polyamory, Foursome (M/M/M/NB), Non-Binary Character, 5 Times, Explicit Sexual Content, Light BDSM

Summary: Cain has been mourning his wife Colette for two years. Despite the promise he made her, he hasn't attempted to date again. Enter his best friend Crowley with a devious plan to help him find Someone New.

#hozier #spn #hoziernatural #spn rare pairs #spn poly #spn femslash #Calthazar #Samifer #Mary/Rowena #Cain/Castiel/Benny/Dean #spn fic #spn art #rec list

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dothwrites · 9 months

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after the horror of first blood we do get 'lily sunder has some regrets' which is a very nice apology episode.

i do love that when dean and cas bicker they give each other the silent treatment. it's SO damn petty of them. i love them. actual husbands. especially when sam has to play marriage counselor and try to get them talking to each other. cas and dean bickering in the car means EVERYTHING to me. "he's thoughtful and appreciative..." damn cas, really just DRAG this man for being a rude husband

"watch the road!" SOMEONE had to say it. a miracle that dean hasn't wrecked the car from staring at cas for too long

love the hypocrisy from sam and dean. it's GOOD that they're mad about how ishim is treating cas because ishim is being a first rate douche, but it's like they really don't realize that they've said the same kinds of shit about cas. they've insulted him and denigrated him. and they probably thought that they had a good reason for it, or even that they were doing it in fun, but cas doesn't pick up on those nuances. the episode literally begins with dean saying that cas has been busy "not finding kelly kline" and proceeding to insult cas for losing her. look, i love sam and dean as much as the next person, but sometimes the pot is calling the kettle black

i do love cas' lady vessel. i like to think that it's jimmy's great-grandmother. though akobel saying "how could anyone know humans and not love them"...cas, about a hundred years later, you're going to completely understand what he was saying, but by then it's going to be too late.

ishim is so incredibly right. humans ARE dangerous to angels. not necessarily in the way he thinks, but look at what happened to cas. he met sam and dean and then he had FEELINGS. he had DOUBT. humans are dangerous because no angel can be around them long without experiencing emotions. they threaten the status quo. cas was around humans and he started to FEEL. and after that, everything was kind of downhill from there (sometimes in the best way possible)

"where's my phone" this is an angel who's been around for MILLENNIA and he's LOST HIS PHONE

the final scene between cas, ishim, and dean! "i'm going to cure you of your human weakness"??? EVERYONE knows that dean is cas' weak spot! that's the person he will NOT let suffer and die. and ishim believes he was in love with lily. so if he's using cas as a parallel, it 100% means that he believes cas is in love with dean and then dean proves it EVEN MORE by refusing to banish ishim if there's a chance that it could hurt cas. he knows the stakes. he knows that his life is in danger if he doesn't do it. but ishim tells him that it could possibly kill cas, and so he doesn't do the thing guaranteed to save his life.

and when cas tells lily that she lost a child and he can't imagine the pain... don't worry baby. you will. you'll imagine that and worse. 💖

#doth watches spn

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tiktaalic · 1 year

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what do you like most about supernatural and what are your favorite seasons and episodes?

Really good. Question. I love that they jump the shark I really do. Over and over again. Parody of itself. I love that shark jumping necessitates that they hop tone switches. I love that they do things badly. My favorite thing about season one is that. The John dean sam dynamic feels like getting walloped in the teeth. And season one dean haunts the narrative forever you see forty year old dean and you see 26 year old dean beneath him completely unrecognizable and you want to die. 2 is just a fun motw show that’s interesting and has you engaged in the plot until again. Dean wallops you in the teeth. I would describe 4 as the first major shift because suddenly Real Consequences show up. The Big Plan shows up. Cas is there and it is genuinely so moving to watch him struggle through defecting from everything he’s ever known to become a softer more human thing. 4.01 genuinely really engaging episode even when you know what’s coming it’s fun to watch! It’s fun to go oh ho ho they’re trying to solve the Mystery of what’s powerful enough to Raise Dean From Hell! This Mystery Entity is pulling out all the stops! Doing things we’ve never seen before! What could it be! It’s cas :-). Six mostly sucks but then there man who would be king. Seven mostly sucks but there’s godstiel and born again identity. Eight is. Epic highs and lows for sure. There are some god awful episodes in there. Unwatchable episodes. Skip every time I remember they’re coming up episodes. But. There’s goodbye stranger. There’s the finale. There’s purgatory. Hunter heroci. Cas lobotomies. Naomi. Season 8 is the easiest one for me to romanticize because there’s a heaping pile of shining elements in it. Dean has a spray tan cas is getting brainwashed for caring too much sam is dying of consumption it’s all really quite good except for the episodes that are bad. After that it gets good again in s13. Except for the bad parts zksidnejc. Jack really shook up the show in a good way imo! Stakes ballooned out starting. Season 9 ish? And I think he grounds the show a bit so that interpersonal stakes are the ones that you’re invested in. 14 GREAT season stellar season the best season of supernatural in ages. Start to finish. Jack has a great little plot he wrestles with the entire time about his own development. And there’s the god reveal!!!! Wonderful season. Definitely a favorite. And I know people have mixed feelings on 15 but I think it’s a fun romp until it’s not.

Favorite seasons chronologically: 1 4 8 14

Favorite episodes: oh. Skin. What is and what should never be. All hell breaks loose. Lazarus rising. Monster at the end of this book. That episode in season 4 where cas kills himself by archangel with chuck. Free to be you and me. Head of a pin. Endverse. Man who would be king. Season 7 opener. The purgatory flashbacks are scattered between a few different eps so I just watch the compilation on YouTube. I like the eps with Linda and Kevin. Goodbye stranger. S8 finale. S9 is fucking. Dire. But 9.01 is fine. 9.06 for cas with a baby. Meta fiction. Fan. Fiction. Season 12 opener. Oh that casifer episode where they’re on a submarine that’s fun. That episode where dean yells at Mary in her head. Season 12 finale. The future. The first six episodes of s13 back to back to back to back. I like scorpion and the frog. I like stuck in the middle with you. I like mint condition. Asa fox. Lily sunder. Twigs and twine. Season 14 honestly all bangers once you get past the first 3 eps. INCLUDING! Lebanon. Ouroboros is included in this but I am mentioning it by name because today when I drove to work it was all. That I thought about. Coffin ocean done. Byzantine? I think is the one with Naomi. But again 14 all bangers. 15 I have to say the rupture and the trap. Legally. Belphagor eps those too. Atomic monsters. I liked. I think it was the gamblers? . FRENCH MISTAKE. Um. End of the list from the top of my head.

#ask #anonymous #spnwatch #long post

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vanshikathequeenofheavens · 1 year

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I am not a person who fails to admit the wrongdoings of a character just because I love that character.

I am a Cas and Dean girl through and through. But there are things Cas has done that I actually hate.

I do not hate cas for working with Crowley and eating the laviathens. I do not hate castiel for trying to kill the kid jesse. I do not hate cas for doing what he did to lily sunder and Claire Novak's family.

Castiel didn't wanted to separate Dean from whatever normal apple pie life he had created for himself. Cas cared about Dean too much and he wanted Dean to be happy. Cas didn't want to ask more after everything Dean has gone through and that is understandable. Working with Crowley was wrong but cas never imagined that he would end up hurting humans. Saving the world and Dean and Sam from another apocalypse was Cas's motivation to work with Crowley. All Cas intended was eating the souls, getting powerful enough and defeating Raphael. That's it. Cas didn't knew anything about the laviathens. He didn't knew that he would end swallowing one of the corrupted creatures in the world. And from the moment cas swallowed the laviathens he was under control of them. He killed so many humans and angels because he was under control of laviathens.

Killing lily Sunder's daughter is one of Cas's greatest regret. But he didn't regret it until he found out that lily sunder's daughter was a human. He had no regret of killing that child as long as he knew that the child was a nephilim. And when he was made aware of the truth he was willing to let lily sunder have her revenge even if it means she would want to kill him. Cas was ready to kill the anti-christ jesse even though he was just a child because Cas believed that Jesse was dangerous to the world. Cas was willing to let Kelly Kline and Jack die with Jack still in kelly's womb because Jack was a nephilim and cas believed him to be a danger to the world. It is when Jack showed him a vision of future that he chose to let Kelly and Jack live. It is after Cas raised Jack that he grew to sympathies with nephilims.

Now if we are going think about what he did to Claire's family, we need to open our mind. You can't hate a lion for hunting a deer. It is in the nature of lion to hunt, otherwise the lion would starve and die. The lion is wired like that. Cas was also wired to follow the order of heaven. He was wired to not give a shit about humans. It was his nature. He was ready to destroy an entire town with its people, why would he give shit about a little girl and his family ?

But cas changed, he rebelled, he chose to care about humans. He went against his very nature, something no Angel ever attempted to do. He refused to follow the script chuck wrote for him. He literally managed to Brek out of the control of the God. Again something no one ever succeeded in doing. He felt remorse for his actions. Claire is completely valid in her anger. But we as a viewer should see things from Cas's perspective as well. It is unfair of us to hate cas for not changing sooner when no other Angel except Gabriel ever tried to change.

But the things that i do not like about cas is how he allowed the sacrifice of Rowena's son in order to remove Mark of Cain from Dean. He could have stopped it but he chose to stand there doing nothing and allowing an innocent man to die so that someone he loved could be saved. That was extremely selfish of him. I will forever hate it.

Another thing I hated was when Cas killed that nephilim in order to complete the ritual of closing the gates of heaven. Now we all know that saving humanity was an excuse and cas did all that to just save Dean. Killing an innocent nephilim who wasn't hurting anyone just to save someone he loved was evil and selfish. Given what I wrote about Cas's feeling regarding nephilims, i am a little conflicted about how to feel about this.

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shallowrambles · 8 months

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Honestly, I’ve been hesitant to post about Dean and Cas’s trial separation because so many ppl get mad about it, but I’ll be honest now and admit that I loved it! It’s so real and actually points to them being functionally spousal, and I love that, too. (I find it impossible to analyze without it!)

But one thing I’ve been thinking about this morning is Dean’s lack of negotiation in The Trap. Cas laid out his terms, and Dean answered each point in prayer, but Dean only had one: he just wanted Cas to stay.

That’s meager. That’s starvation-level rations.

Now, it’s very likely that their please-communicate-with-me/lies-of-omission discussion came later. After all, they’re way too trusting on the back end of the season.

But maybe also… since Dean has that desire to both protect and be protected by Cas, maybe he decided being protected by Cas was worth the rest.

It’s that irrational, desperate, “You’ll figure it out, right?” that keeps popping up in later seasons for Dean. He wants to be needed. He wants Cas to come to him for support and mutual decision-making, but especially now that they’re more “together,” he irrationally also wants a Superman spouse to take care of and fix everything. Importantly, he doesn’t really demand or expect this. He just longs for it; he can’t help it.

When Cas got the Leviathan blossom on his own, maybe it was so comforting that Dean’s need to be protected by Cas took center-stage for the time being. After all, he’s acquiescing to Cas taking on the Mark in the next scene.

It seems like Dean has come to something of a precipice when it comes to accepting Cas’s protectorship…and he’s tacitly decided to love and accept it for what it is, along with all the baggage that comes with it.

(That sometimes Cas will shield you in a way that tries to protect you too much and causes problems. That he’ll put himself in danger in front of you.)

This is a stark difference to Dean’s unhinged frustration and worry in season 12’s First Blood/Lily Sunder episodes. In season 15’s Despair, it’s, “She’s gonna kill you. And then she’s gonna kill me.”

It shows an acceptance of the dynamic.

#freeform #dean accepts being saved

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amaranthhiding · 10 months

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Hiding Amaranth

SPN Fanfic Masterlist 1. Destiel + Samwena combined 2. Destiel only 3. Samwena only

1. Destiel + Samwena combined:

Cover by the author (full size)

Empty Earth

Words: 97,192 (WIP) Rating: not rated yet Relationships: Dean/Castiel, Sam/Rowena, Jack & Dean, Jack & Crowley Bang/Fest: none Tags: Canon Universe, Post-Ep 15x18, Epic, Plotty, Angst with Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Action, Adventure, Humor, Romance, Slow Burn, Rowena/Sam First Kiss, Consensual Possession, Angel True Forms, Empty Rescue, Witch Sam Winchester, Queen of Hell Rowena, Rebellion in Hell, Caring Rowena, Caring Crowley, Team Free Will 3.0 Point-of-View Characters: Dean, Sam, Jack, Castiel, Rowena, Crowley, Naomi, HunterCorp Dean, Michael, Kevin, Balthazar Summary: After Castiel's confession, Dean carries a spark of hope telling him this can't be the end. This spark is the strongest weapon for Dean, Sam and Jack in this final war. The enemy is God. The battlefield is an Earth devoid of humans, a Hell in rebellion, and a Heaven betrayed by its creator. And the stakes are everything and everyone they have ever cared about. Read on AO3 ✧ Excerpt ✧ Text Trailer ✧ Art1 ✧ Art2

Banner by spiffyflypie

Map to Yesterday

Words: 23,003 (finished) Rating: Teen Relationships: Dean/Castiel, Sam/Rowena Bang/Fest: Dean/Cas Reverse Bang (2022) Tags: Canon Universe, Amnesia, Mass Amnesia on Team Free Will (including Rowena), Mystery, Magic, Road Trip, Recovery of Identity, Angst, Humor, Romance, Castiel/Dean First Kiss, Hurt/Comfort, Action, Adventure, Angel Wings, Trapped Together in a Small Space, Caring Rowena, Team Free Will 3.0 Point-of-View Characters: Dean Summary: Team Free Will wakes up with no memory of where they are, or who they are. Left with nothing but some foggy shreds of their identities, they have to rediscover themselves and each other—and team up to piece together what even happened. Read on AO3 ✧ Excerpt ✧ Text Trailer ✧ Art

More of my fics below the cut ("Destiel only" + "Samwena only" categories)

2. Destiel only:

Banner by Aggiedoll

Indeana Jones and the Tear of Pele

Words: 32,679 (finished) Rating: Explicit Relationships: Dean/Castiel Bang/Fest: Dean/Cas Reverse Bang (2024)

Tags: Canon Universe, Post-Season-11, Beach Vacation, Adventure, Hawaiian Mythology, Humor, Angst with Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Magic, Mystery, Fallen Angel Castiel, Castiel's True Form, Mutual Pining, Idiots in Love, Dean in Denial, Dean Makes Up Ridiculous Excuses for Touch, Castiel and Dean Save Each Other Point-of-View Characters: Dean, Castiel Summary: What starts as a relaxing beach vacation in Hawai’i turns into a journey of self-discovery for Castiel and Dean.

To save the world from the Darkness, they both faced what they thought to be their imminent demise and came out the other side very much still alive. So now they have to ponder the really big questions, such as what a bucket list is, what place in the world a fallen angel has, and how Indiana Jones ever managed to keep that hat on his head.

The island seems to have a way of making the barrier of touch crumble to dust until they're sliding toward the edge of something new and fragile between them that neither of them dares to put a name to, lest it might disappear.

When what really disappears is Castiel, there's very little Dean wouldn't do to get the angel back.

Read on AO3 ✧ Excerpt ✧ Text Trailer ✧ Art

Banner by Suninjang

Forest Fever

Words: 8,586 (finished) Rating: Explicit Relationships: Dean/Castiel, Dean & Castiel, Sam & Castiel Bang/Fest: Dean/Cas Stab Fest (2022) Tags: Canon Universe, Post-Ep 12x10, Monster of the Week, Case Fic - Lite, Hunting, Forests, Mystery (a little), Hallucinations, Angst with Happy Ending, Romance, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, Castiel/Dean First Kiss, Castiel/Dean First Time Having Sex, Angel Grace, Team Free Will Point-of-View Characters: Dean, Sam Summary: After the crushing events of episode 12x10 "Lily Sunder Has Some Regrets", Castiel is low on grace and morale. In an attempt to restore at least one of these two, Sam and Dean take him on a hunt. Things start going wrong when Sam gets injured and Cas seemingly disappears. They get worse when Dean turns from hunter to prey for something feeling far more at home in this dark, rainy forest than he does. Read on AO3 ✧ Excerpt ✧ Text Trailer ✧ Art ✧ Making-Of

Banner by marvfortytwo

The Little Issue with the Mission to Perdition

Words: 16,460 (finished) Rating: Teen Relationships: Dean/Castiel, Jack & Amara, Background Sam/Eileen Bang/Fest: Dean/Cas Reverse Bang (2023) Tags: Canon Universe, Post-Ep 15x19, Jack and Amara Try Fixing Things Together but Make Everything Worse, Jack and Amara Family Bonding, Empty Rescue, Angst with Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Castiel/Dean First Kiss, Team Free Will 3.0 Point-of-View Characters: Jack, Amara, Dean, Sam, Castiel Summary: Chuck is defeated and his power now belongs to Jack and Amara. They struggle with adjusting to their newly-shared existence, and with big questions such as, how can (almost) all-powerful beings avoid becoming what Chuck was?

What even is all that power good for when it doesn't allow Jack to save someone from the Empty who absolutely deserves being saved?

Who thought it was a good idea to hand all that power to two beings who, together, have spent less years on Earth than the average human child?

...And why is there suddenly black goo everywhere? Read on AO3 ✧ Excerpt ✧ Text Trailer ✧ Art

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Empty and (Un-)Out

Words: 2,666 (finished) Rating: Teen Relationships: Dean/Castiel Bang/Fest: none Tags: Canon Universe, Episode 15x18, Humor, Crack Treated Seriously, Misha's Un-Coming Out, Bishagate, The New York Post Article that Claimed Castiel Confessed to Sam, Castiel's Confession Scene, Castiel/Dean First Kiss Point-of-View Characters: Dean Summary: My (probably insane) way of dealing with Misha's un-coming out. Read on AO3 ✧ Excerpt ✧ Text Trailer ✧ Art

3. Samwena only:

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A Metal Pursued by the Witless

Words: 46,556 (finished) Rating: Explicit Relationships: Sam/Rowena, Sam & Rowena Bang/Fest: SPN RarePairTober (2022) (Prompt: "Fool's Gold") Tags: Canon Universe, Post-Ep 13x19, Magic, Witchcraft, Curses, Adventure, Action, Romance, Humor, Angst with Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Mutual Pining, Travel to Exotic Location Point-of-View Characters: Sam, Rowena, Dean Summary: Rowena shows up at the bunker after she has been targeted by a lethal curse with the sole goal of destroying her. Under the shadow of this ticking timer of doom, she and Sam are left with a handful of days to prevent a slow, painful death. The search for a cure sees them on a last-minute flight to Central America. (Or my attempt to escape the cold and gray of real-life winter by traveling to faraway places in my mind.) Read on AO3 ✧ Excerpt ✧ Text Trailer ✧ Art1 ✧ Art2

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Regarding Sam

Words: 7,292 (finished) Rating: Teen Relationships: Sam/Rowena, Rowena & Amnesiac Dean Bang/Fest: Sam Winchester Rare Ships Week (2023) (Day 6: Missing Scene / Episode Tag)

Tags: Canon Universe, Episode 12x11, Missing Scenes, Angst with Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Life-or-Death Stakes, Magic, Witches, Rowena Realizes She Cares, Pre-Relationship, Sam Being a Prisoner, Amnesiac Dean Being Chaotic, Humor

Point-of-View Characters: Rowena

Summary: When they hear Sam's blood-curdling scream over the phone, Rowena is far more affected than she thought possible. She has to make up her mind whether or not to turn her back on the Winchesters in their dire need—and how far exactly she'll go to save them. (Or my version of what happened in episode 12x11 between Sam's scream and the moment we see Dean wake up in the Impala, plus two additional new scenes at other blank spaces where the episode faded to black. And all of that from Rowena's point of view!) Read on AO3 ✧ Excerpt ✧ Text Trailer ✧ Art

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Dibs on Samuel

Words: 2,194 (finished) Rating: Teen Relationships: Sam/Rowena Bang/Fest: SPN Royalty of Hell Weekend (2023) (Day 2: Queen of Hell) Tags: Canon Universe, Episode 15x08, Rowena/Sam First Kiss, Angst with Happy Ending, Angst and Romance, Hurt/Comfort, Ruler of Hell Rowena, Sam Using Magic Point-of-View Characters: Sam Summary: Now that the fact had sunken in that Rowena wasn't gone forever, that she was only a spell away, he couldn't let it go. He had to return to Hell. Read on AO3 ✧ Excerpt ✧ Text Trailer ✧ Art

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latinocas · 1 year

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Lily Sunders, Mary Winchester and Bela Talbot could be an amazing Claire Novak pipeline.

Bela is a version of Samless version of Dean that sold her soul not out of love for her brother, but out of love for herself. Claire was abandoned by both her parents (even if they loved her) so it makes me wonder what would have been of Bela and Claire if Bela had survived enough and Claire had found her instead of the Winchesters.

Mary is another version of Dean who got a taste of the apple pie life but in the way Dean tasted it with thw djin or with Lisa. The difference again is that Mary was an only child and she was a woman, so they killed her tp push John, Dean and Sam to action. Like Bela, Mary sacrificed her parents, prioritizing her own life. She also made a deal with hell, and like Claire she knows how it's like losing everything due Heaven's orders. Castiel needed Jimmy, Sam and Dean needed to get born, Claire and Mary were collateral damage.

And no one better than Lily Sunders to understand how Claire feels about angels. Two sides of the same coin, the woman that lost her child and the child that lost her mother, both know how it's like to have grace coursing through your veins, how it's like holding an angels blade no one taught you to hold. Both connected to Castiel, both hunters in a way heaven didn't expect. They also lost someone they romantically love and grew up in a not hunter lifestyle.

Ignore the traditional family tags (grandmother, mother, aunt, sister, whatever). Lily, Mary and Bela could be amazing mentors for Claire.

#spn #supernatural #Claire Novak #Mary Campbell #Mary Winchester #Lily Sunders #Bela Talbot #My posts

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cosmicoceanfic · 11 months

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Claireverse Lily Sunder coda

Castiel has always liked to sit in the Bunker’s kitchen in the dark. He doesn’t need the light the way the Winchesters do. There is something peaceful in the stillness of the dark, and he could use all the peace he could get.

The light turns on and Castiel blinks, looking at the doorway.

Claire’s new thing is oversized hoodies. She likes ones big enough to drown in, which means often that, just like now, she steals one of Sam’s, hands buried in the pocket of his Stanford hoodie.

“Thought I’d find you in here,�� she says. “You’re in here a lot.”

“I like the kitchen,” Castiel answers. “It… feels like the heart. Why are you awake?”

“I’m hungry. Can you make me a sandwich?”

“Eating before bed can cause digestion issues.”

“Being so hungry I’m awake causes insomnia issues.”

Castiel’s lips tilt. She picks up new words and he’s never sure where. “Insomnia issues?”

Claire lifts her chin. “It’s a serious problem.”

Castiel gets up from the table. “I suppose I could make you a peanut butter and jelly.”

Claire settles into a seat. “What about peanut butter and fluff?”

“Peanut butter and jelly,” Castiel reasserts firmly. There’s only so far he will allow himself to be played by a child.

“Hmm.”

“On white bread,” he allows.

Claire perks up a little. “Ooh. Dad always makes me eat it on wheat cause he’s a health freak.”

Castiel pulls the jelly out of the fridge. Raspberry, just how she likes it. “Don’t call your father a health freak.”

“Papa calls him a health freak.”

“Dean calls Sam many things, most of which you are not allowed to call him, either.” Castiel sets the slices of bread on the plate. “It is good for you to eat wheat. Very fibrous.”

“Jelly’s fruit and peanut butter’s nuts and those are healthy and I should be able to have white bread more often to balance it out.”

“You can try making a case to your father, but I would suggest you remember that your father was once training to be a lawyer.”

“Any time Dad pulls lawyer bullshit, Papa just makes fart noises until he stops.”

“Don’t say bullshit. And flatulent noises will do nothing for you to attain your white bread.” Castiel sits down across from Claire, pushing the sandwich towards her. “Here you are.”

“Thanks, Cas.”

“You’re welcome, Claire.”

Claire takes a bite of the sandwich. “So what’s your problem?”

“…I beg your pardon?”

“Well, you were really quiet all night, and you hugged me really tight when you got home, and I asked Papa and he said you were fine, and I asked Dad and he said you were fine, so I thought I’d ask you, cause you don’t really lie to me a lot.”

Castiel considers.

“I was not… I did something bad, a long time ago. It was by accident, but it was still bad. And I think… I think I’m going to have to do something bad again. But on purpose this time.”

“Why?”

“It… is very complicated.” Castiel looks down at his hands. “I… have not been a good person, always.”

“But you’re a good person now.”

“Perhaps.”

Claire chews her sandwich contemplatively.

“Well,” she says decisively. “You can’t say mean things about my friend Cas. That’s bullshit. You wanna be mean about my friend Cas, I get to sock you in the nuts.”

“Don’t say-“

“Aunt Charlie lets me say bullshit!”

“I am not your Aunt Charlie.” Castiel smiles slightly. “But I appreciate the sentiment.” His smile fades. “I… I do everything I do to keep you safe. You do know that, right?”

“Yeah, which is why I think you should be mean to yourself less.”

“I have lived… a complicated life, Claire. And I…” He thinks about Lily Sunder. He thinks about saying to her I have a daughter now. I would have done much the same as you. “I don’t know. I have not always been a good person.”

“I remember you when you were scary.”

Castiel blinks. “What?”

“I remember you when you were scary. And I liked you then.”

His brow furrows. “I’m rather frightening now.”

Claire snorts. “No, you’re not. One time I saw you get stuck in a sweater. You’re just kinda silly. And dumb.”

Castiel huffs a quiet laugh. “You’re your father’s daughter.”

“Which father?”

“Your mean father.”

Claire giggles. “He is mean.”

“He loves you very much.”

“I know. That’s not my point. You’re distracting me.”

“I’m sorry. Please continue.”

“I don’t remember that much about when you were scary, cause I’m old now.” Castiel suppresses a smile, looking at the table. “Not as old as you and Dad and Papa. You guys are ancient. But I’m still old. But I liked you then! And I like you now. And I think you should chill out.”

Castiel can’t help a grin. “Chill out, huh?”

“Yeah, Aunt Charlie and Aunt Meg say Papa would be happier if he had even an ounce of chill.”

“Mm. Probably true.”

Castiel just watches Claire for a moment. She scrunches her face up. “What?”

“Someday you are going to get older,” he tells her. “And you will think of me differently. But I will love you just the same, always. And you have jelly on your chin.” Claire wipes the jelly off with her thumb and licks it. He laughs quietly again. “You shouldn’t do that.”

“Are you gonna narc on me to Dad and Papa? Mr. Narc?”

“No.”

“Alright, then.”

“Finish your sandwich, Claire. You require your rest.” Claire shoves the rest of the sandwich in her mouth. “Not so fast. You’ll choke.”

“Do you want me to finish the sandwich or not?”

“Don’t talk with your mouth full.”

With a little effort, Claire swallows the rest of the sandwich. She stands up and hugs Castiel.

“Sleep well, Claire.”

“Night, Cas. You want the light off?”

“Yes, please.”

“Okay.”

Claire turns off the light, and Castiel returns to the darkness once more.

#spn #claireverse #claire doesn’t call cas by a father term but he is very much her father also #also this is a destiel story! stay away w*nicest freaks!#ocean speaks #ocean’s fic

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astermacguffin · 1 year

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I posted 23,395 times in 2022

80 posts created (0%)

23,315 posts reblogged (100%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@autisticandroids

@thatll-do

@castielsclitoris

@sosaysdean

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I tagged 5,141 of my posts in 2022

#prev - 454 posts

#ough - 275 posts

#yeah - 183 posts

#spn - 125 posts

#ohmygod - 106 posts

#dta - 101 posts

#goncharov - 101 posts

#asfghkshkfs - 100 posts

#so true - 91 posts

#he - 81 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#intactics voice consider 3 sides. now consider what ‘3’ means in the absence of any sides a 3 totally divorced from quantity. consider that

My Top Posts in 2022:

Wait am I just misremembering things or did Lily Sunder and Cas really barely interact in the ep where they resurrect Jack? Because it's like. Here's a man who helped in the murder of your daughter and now he's begging you to help bring back his son. LIKE. HELLO. That's super fucking compelling. I think it should have been Cas who made the "you know how it feels to lose a child; please don't make us lose him too" plea instead of Dean. I think the impact of that scene would be better (and also more convincing given. You know. Dean wanting to kill Jack for a good chunk of their intial relations lol).

The scene could go many ways. You can have an angry Lily, who rubs it in hard, the irony of their situation. How unfair it is that Cas has the chance to do what Lily failed to accomplish for decades.

You can have a more sympathetic Lily, who looks at the face of this worn and weary angel and sees someone completely different from the merciless soldier she met a long time ago.

You can have different combinations of these and more. I wish there were more fics exploring the dynamic between Lily and Cas. (If you have fic recs, PLEASE send them here.)

78 notes - Posted January 30, 2022

One of the most annoying responses I see when discussing S9 Dean's toxic moments is "oh that's just the Mark which means dean is absolved of all moral responsibility for his actions" which is. Huh?????? That's such a boring and stupid response and it's kinda on par with the way some folks excuse everything that late-seasons Dean does by saying "oh that's just Chuck manipulating him, which means he totally can't be blamed for the things he did" which is also soooooooo.

Like. Okay. On the one hand I kinda get the impulse to go straight to a Doylist explanation and blame the writers for writing Dean in such egregious ways (because it's TRUE) but like. Personally I tend to find that boring after a while. This is my weaker argument.

My stronger argument is that by refusing to grapple with the events of canon by transferring the blame to some other external force (blaming the Mark/Chuck for the Watsonian, blaming the writers for the Doylist), the characters aren't really given justice

What I mean by this is that it leaves the characters in an awkward stalemate.

On Dean's part: "If there's a force external to me that I can blame (e.g. the Mark, Chuck) then I don't really need to grapple with the things I've done." This is harmful not just to himself but to the people around him, particularly his loved ones who are typically the ones affected by his actions.

This type of thinking actually hinders the characters' ability to properly deal with the events and possibly make amends. They have no mechanism for moving on other than sucking it up and brushing things under the rug.

Take, for example, Cas' internality in the face of all of these things that Dean did. It's natural for Cas to feel negative emotions in response to All Of That (e.g. anger, sadness, resentment, fear, etc). However, if it's true that Dean really isn't to blame for all of That, then Cas' emotions have nowhere to go. "Dean has tried to murder my son multiple times and I have plenty of Feelings about this but actually it's not his fault because he's been manipulated by God so now I just have to suck up all these emotions." LIKE. That is totally NOT healthy for your psyche, angel or not.

The characters end up not being capable of grappling with the consequences of things because agency and moral responsibility keeps being shifted into these external forces.

91 notes - Posted February 1, 2022

I know that post-canon baby jack fics are usually written for fluff but EYE personally think they should be used for evil more often. I want a non-god, toddler jack who doesn't remember much of the very traumatic first three years of his life but still has some glaring triggers. Like. For example, toddler jack is EXTREMELY claustrophobic. Every time they enter a small and enclosed space, he immediately cries and starts clinging on dean and going "I'M SORRY I'M SORRY PLEASE DON'T LOCK ME UP" and both sam and dean feel their guts turning, knowing that they did that to jack. The only small and enclosed space that jack tolerates is the impala. Anyways. Society if more post-canon fics grappled with what sam and dean did to jack before giving us a "happily ever after".

91 notes - Posted January 28, 2022

Hey folks welcome to another evil and fucked up fic concept from yours truly:

S13. Okay. Dean is still fucked up with grief, and the combination of fear, anger, and resentment he feels towards Jack is certainly not a good mix. Still, he prefers these latter emotions because at least they're actionable emotions. You can run away or fight that which you fear or resent, but what do you do to the rotting void of grief?

All these negative emotions eventually spiral into some form of paranoia, a constant stream of "What if he turns evil? What if he takes even more from me?" Over and over in his head.

Now. What if. While they're searching the bunker for resources to help them deal with Jack, Dean accidentally stumbles upon something in their storage: a metal crown and a set of spikes. A contraption that Crowley left behind—Naomi's tools.

In fear of Jack turning evil, Dean picks up Naomi's lobotomy contraptions so he can program Jack to "not be evil."

When Dean straps down Jack into the chair, he gives the kid his very first smile. "Don't worry, kid. I'll make sure you'll never lose your path."

When Cas is finally resurrected again, everything's fine and cool and happy. And then Jack goes "Oh yeah I have weekly tuning sessions with Dean." And Cas asks. What "tuning sessions." And he watches in horror as Jack puts on the crown that Naomi uses for the lobotomies.

Cas confronts Dean about this. They fight. Cas was about to leave with Jack. Dean panics; he orders Jack to hold Cas down and prevent him from escaping.

With Jack's help, Dean tearfully straps Cas down to the chair and puts the crown on him. "I'm sorry, Cas. But I can't lose you again."

Everything is fine and cool and normal. If Sam notices some odd behavior here and there, he tries not to think too hard about it. Besides, this is the first time that they had been this happy and peaceful for a length of time, why ruin it?

Eventually, however, Sam can't ignore things any longer. His suspicions eventually lead him into finding out what Dean's been doing this entire time.

Sam confronts Dean about it. They fight. When Sam was about to take Jack and Cas away from there, Dean utters a trigger word and makes Sam fall under his control.

It turns out that this isn't the first time that Sam found out what's happening, and that Dean has been repeatedly rewriting his memories this entire time.

At first, Dean just asked Jack to erase Sam's memories. This plan doesn't work long term because Sam either just rediscovers what happens or regains his memories. Dean then ordered Jack to gradually and discreetly feed Sam some grace and transform him into as close as an angel as possible so that the Naomi's tools would work on him as well.

This bit is from jay @casnation , thanks for this: Sam repeatedly wakes up and tries to get Cas and Jack out of there but they��re programmed to take him to Dean if he does this. Like, he could totally escape if he didn’t try to save them every time.

There will be a point where the brainwashing gets so severe that they basically lose their personalities in a way that even Dean cannot ignore anymore. And so he "reprograms their personalities back" based on Dean's perceptions of them.

Crucially there will also be a point where Dean realizes just how bad he's fucked up (ideally in conjunction with the realization that he's living with three husks with zero personality), but he's trapped himself into a corner. Because he KNOWS that the moment he undoes the programming, they would all run the fuck away from that bunker and leave him alone. And he would rather reprogram them ad infinitum rather than face the consequences of what he did.

Another incredible quote from jay: "Pygmalion carving himself not just a lover but a family."

More stuff below the cut (specifically how Mary reacts to All of This when she returns from the Apocalypse World):

Dean does NOT have the guts to lobotomize his own mother. He can stomach doing it to Sam and Cas because he's already pretty good at ignoring their autonomy. Which means that Dean has to employ more subtle methods of hiding things from Mary.

He can order Cas to reaasure Mary that "everything is fine." He can also order Jack to distract Mary by bonding with her.

Here's another bit courtesy of jay: "Mary notices something is up with Sam first and Dean just says “How would you know? I’ve know him his whole life, he’s fine, you’ve only been back a year!"

Another jay bit: "no thoughts just mary looking up and realizing the bunker is a clockwork recreation of her fantasy of married life with john with cas as her role. and she has no idea what to do"

I have no idea how to end this. We can go with the more horrific route where Mary never discovers what's truly going on and so they're all just trapped there, Pygmalion and the family he carved.

The other option is that Mary finds out. This has two potential outcomes: (1) Mary convinces Dean to undo the programming. They all run the fuck out of there and leave Dean alone to face what he did. Or, (2) In a desperate attempt to keep his family together, Dean orders Jack and Cas to hold Mary down and make her forget what she discovered. The story ends with Dean, tears in his eyes, putting metal spikes in his mother's skull.

(Also. I want y'all to know that there are more fucked up parts to this but those shall remain in the dark corners of our discord chats lol)

124 notes - Posted March 8, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Hypothetical destiel pairings that are sooooooo important to me:

- stanford era dean and s15 divorce arc cas

Imagine Cas seeing a version of the love of his life that doesn't carry the amount of baggage he currently has. A version of his love that has not yet pointed a gun to his son.

- s4 cas and s13 widower arc dean

Imagine Dean seeing this version of Cas. He's so young! And he still haven't died a single death for you just yet. You look at this angel and think: you haven't fallen in all the ways that matter just yet.

- endverse cas and s15 divorce arc dean

Imagine Dean experiencing a whiplash when endverse Cas confronts him and says "in the worst ways, you're a lot similar to my Dean. Sometimes I think you're even worse."

- faith dean and emmanuel cas

You're dying. You're dying and your dad won't even answer the phone but here comes this man, this faith healer who looks you in the eye and says "you're not a machine, Dean." Who looks at you and sees someone worth saving, someone who you can barely see.

- post-rapture cas and mark of cain dean

"I serve Heaven, I don't serve Man. And I certainly don't serve you." Imagine a post-lobotomy Cas seeing his charge at his very lowest and seeing what he's told confirmed by his very eyes. That the Righteous Man is not who he thinks he is.

- s3 dean and post-swan song cas

You're going to hell. You're going to hell and you can't stop it but here comes this angel who has fallen for you, who rebelled against heaven for you. And you can't stop thinking whether or not you were born with this rot, with the curse to poison everything you touch. But the angel says "I would fall again a million times if it means I get to protect you from perdition."

125 notes - Posted January 27, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #Wait the tags list is so fucking funny lol

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paradisecas · 1 year

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I posted 3,970 times in 2022

That's 3,970 more posts than 2021!

244 posts created (6%)

3,726 posts reblogged (94%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@quicksilver-castiel

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I tagged 2,974 of my posts in 2022

Only 25% of my posts had no tags

#q - 642 posts

#queue’ll be my guide - 261 posts

#mine - 249 posts

#midam - 146 posts

#michael - 87 posts

#video - 58 posts

#adam - 57 posts

#michaelghoul - 55 posts

#gt - 53 posts

#midamoul - 53 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#and adam having the angry ominous glowing stars for eyes when michaels like no shes never seen me before. nobody has. you’re the only one i

My Top Posts in 2022:

dont know how yet. but toying w the idea of something along the lines of— the apocalypse goes wrong, but instead of falling into the cage, michael and adam are shot back in time. something about michaels wings being injured his grace being leeched away so they cant just pop back to their time. michael says he will heal in time hoping it will be quick but. it is not.

~200 years sharing a body on earth. adam grappling with the past and history. michael actually living among humans within a vessel with no big Purpose other than just waiting to heal. building a life over and over again before having to move on before people notice how adam doesn’t age. living through horrible events not being able to change anything. michael thinks god will find them, adam tries increasingly ridiculous ways of contacting the future that never work out. looking for angels who would hopefully help them. something with lily sunder. meeting monsters esp immortal ones. maybe they even meet rowena who knows. reaching the year kate milligan was born.

eventually realizing like. what would they even do when they got back to their present? both of them are entirely changed, different, faithless. neither of them even have something to get back to. over a hundred years waiting only to realize they weren’t waiting for anything, really.

and i think it ends oh somewhere still a while before their present but it’s chuck decides he wants to use michael so he heals his wings and his grace and they only want to use it to travel within the past but chuck pulls them to 2019. still missing a decade. this time michael doesn’t go back to chuck in the end because he spent all that time with humanity and doesn’t see how destroying them could be in any way good. and from there? no idea. happily ever after or whatever.

94 notes - Posted March 8, 2022

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96 notes - Posted November 22, 2022

thinking of all the different types of soulmate aus i loved in my youth and their midam potential.

everything u draw shows up on them? adam doodling on his arm and in heaven everyones like um michael there is. i think thats a flower? allll up in u.

seeing in black and white until you meet your soulmate? the first time adam sees color is when he looks at michaels true form and then immediately hes in the cage for a thousand years. something something dreamscape in his memories all black and white even though he Should be able to see color vs michaels angel memories being his only exposure to a colorful world.

telepathy? adams twirling his hair trying to mind flirt with his soulmate and michael’s like. just another prayer !! why is it so loud. hush, little human, pray a little quieter

timer on the wrist? adam dies before it runs out but it keeps going in heaven he thinks he’ll meet them there and then he’s too wrapped up in yk. being tortured and abandoned and possessed to realize it ran out. (could it be bobby or something? why would it be him. well who else did i meet before you dragged me down here?)

stop aging until you meet your soulmate? adam has a nifty excuse for why he looks like hes 19 (but not for why he vanished for 10 years) and michael worries that he’ll prevent adam from knowing he’s met his soulmate so he makes himself a new body and adam immediately starts aging.

body swap for a day? oh baby. adam wakes up and he’s suddenly an incomprehensible being who is expected to Literally Run Heaven but he’s honestly a little more stressed out about the fact that apparently GOD (or his stand-in) is gonna be taking his finals that day. can only hope god knows how to do calculus.

100 notes - Posted April 27, 2022

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101 notes - Posted September 5, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

adam has never heard of one direction. went to hell Months before they formed and missed the entire heyday. that’s the worst part about his time in the cage i think

140 notes - Posted February 27, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#ah the old queue tag. got sick of that real quick #and my longest tag… michaelwave…#also. that’s 3970 more than last year! yeah girl i didnt have this blog last year. thanks for the reminder that i made the conscious choice #to get into spn in 2022 tho.

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autisticandroids · 2 years

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hey, if I stopped watching supernatural at the end of season eight (dean turned into a demon and I noped out) is it worth it to watch the rest of the series? I want to understand the baby driver kid. he seems cool.

this is a really hard question. i almost want to tell you to skip to season twelve but that feels like cheating. nine and ten are some of the worse seasons of the series (you bailed after nine, not eight. eight is the angels falling). but also like personally i do think the back half of the show is worth watching. you could just skip season ten and jump to season eleven, which is much less. just sucking complete ass. or you could skip to season twelve which is pretty close to genuinely enjoyable television. i would say...... get a rec list from someone. get a rec list from several people. you have about a hundred episodes to go, try to cut it down to like. forty, maybe. i think it's worth doing, but it's primarily worth doing as..... a hobbyist, like, someone who enjoys thinking about supernatural. if you mostly just want good popcorn tv, watch star trek instead. here's a google drive link to all of it. the best to just mindlessly binge watch is star trek: the next generation. but like, if you want to Get supernatural... yeah i would recommend finishing it in some capacity. get rec lists from a couple friends who have really conflicting views on the show and do an abbreviated watch. i'll start you off, for me some unmissable episodes of 10-15 SPECIFICALLY that other people might leave out are soul survivor, the werther project, brother's keeper, form and void, the bad seed, alpha and omega, the foundry, rock never dies, the future (no one will skip this one in their reclist but i like it a LOT), the big empty, funeralia, everything written by yockey in season fourteen, the full moriah arc (unfortunately) (that's game night through moriah), atomic monsters, the hero's journey, the gamblers, galaxy brain, unity. obviously there's a lot of big names that are Not on that list, but i'm specifically recommending you follow rec lists from more than one person, and no sane person would tell you to skip black, or what we left behind, or lily sunder has some regrets, or lost and found, or tombstone, or scoobynatural, or the trap, or gimme shelter, or despair

#spn #asks #anonymous

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laufire · 2 years

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ALL OF YOUR SPN WIPS SOUND SO GOOD. okay hard to narrow down but for the wip game can I ask about 1) caswena met before 2) endverse sastiel 3) demonblood kids 2.0 and 4) time traveling jack?

also on the btvs side, 100% support the vampire kendra sequel she deserved wayyy more screentime

Thank you <3

Okay, one by one.

-Caswena met before: this is... one out of three, maybe four? WIPs where I plan to address Castiel's stolen memories. Because I still think it's ridiculous that the show dropped that information to never address it again!

The basic premise is simple: what if Castiel and Rowena had met in the past (likely in less than friendly circumstances), and that memory was stolen from him? She wouldn't be aware of it either, as Castiel would've showed up with a different vessel. Maybe I'd bring back the one from "Lily Sunder Has Some Regrets", because of totally not shallow reasons.

I don't have much more yet, as it's lower on my list of priorities than other WIPs. I just got the idea and added it to the list because I think Caswena is a hot, fun rareship people should pay more attention to xD (I also plan to indulge in some fake married!Caswena in the Desperate Housewives crossover lmao).

-Endverse Sastiel: we never saw endverse!Castiel dead, so I choose to believe he isn't. I mean, I'd consider it very in character for Lucifer to leave Castiel alive (especially season 5 Lucifer, who lbr, feels different than the rest...). Maybe out of some distant sentimentality. And/or enjoying having a righteous angel to torment (like Lucifer taunting him with the possibility of returning some powers to him, for example).

This Castiel would feel even more defeated than we saw in the episode after Dean's death and he'd just... give up. At least, until something happened that, for a brief moment, was enough to bring Sam to the surface. And anger and hope would return then.

I both envision this as one of my "darker" ideas, even for the Endverse (the others don't deal as much with Lucifer. Lucifer is awful xD), yet somehow the one with a chance at a happy-ish/bittersweet ending lmao (within the parameters of the Endverse, where err... about everyone and everything is dead ^^U).

-Demon Blood Kids 2.0: this was an idea surged by some asks from a mutual. Basically, what if at some point demons in Hell tried to bring back this experiment, albeit with different goals than the original?

The story would, ofc, centre around Sam. My idea right now is making it 100% canon compliant. As in, including the information about his life in 15x20 lol. I find the idea of trying to make All Of That make sense and fit within this plot (the random blurry woman, the kid, etc.) a stimulating challenge, what can I say xD. I want to see if I can pull it off.

So the premise would be Sam finding out about those new experiments and being thrown back into that world, with all his conflicting feelings about him. Other returning cast members would be Rowena, as queen of Hell of course; Castiel, Meg and Ruby from the Empty (because Drama. But also because I have this headcanon of Meg as a demon blood kid 0.1 version. I think Hell tried this before and Meg was one of the original Azazel kids, basically. Tom as well). Eileen, because even if I don't ship it and I'm disappointed with how canon wrote them, the resolution is bullshit. And some others.

-Time Travelling Jack: I love time travelling fics and time travelling angst in all its forms. It's actually preposterous it took so long for me to get a solid idea with this premise, tbh.

I started thinking, hey, what if Jack not only was stuck in the past, but specifically in season 9? human!Castiel, possessed!Sam era? And, to make things even angstier, what if it happens after 15x18, precisely at that moment in 15x19 where he's on the street alone, quietly mourning Castiel?

So yeah, that's the Jack that travels back in time. Before Dean gets the Mark of Cain, setting the chain of events that lead to Lucifer escaping the cage. Which, spoiler alert, Jack is going to be determined to prevent. Yeah... he's not in the best emotional state on this one asñdlkfjasf.

Oh, one thing I'm looking forward to with this fic is the possibility of Jack interacting with Gadreel. I think it would be very very neat LOL. Another spoiler is that Kevin doesn't die here, of course :)))

-Vampire Kendra sequel: it would be a continuation of "Beware of Greeks bearing gifs", a one-shot I wrote a couple years ago. I have a lot of ideas of what happens after (Buffy returning to Sunnydale and finding out, Kendra and Faith meeting and how that would alter s3, Angel & Kendra bonding, Kendra & Drusilla's... very messy sire/sired dynamic xD, and so on). It's just I don't have anything concrete inspiring me at the moment. But I love Kendra and I want to write more about her, so I will eventually return to that AU.

ask me about my WIPs!

#homosexualslug #replies #talking to the void #my thoughts #my wips #writing woes #spn thoughts #supernatural #caswena #sastiel #sam winchester #jack kline #kendra young #buffyverse thoughts #buffy the vampire slayer #ty for the ask!

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