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papers4me · 3 years

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Fruits Basket Manga Review , ch 107- 108

se03, ep 6 is weakest ep in se03 despite it being tohru’s long waited focus & having the biggest plot keys & character impactful moments & one of the best pining hug scenes in anime history “ thro the laundry sheets at sunset”. Reading the chapter that starts this ep in the manga made me feel so happy & so angry.. I lament all the subtle yet effective changes & the powerful character-influenced changes that the anime ditched for cheap drama or unexplained wide shot.

-The Art of Subtlety: Power Resides in Words:

In se03, ep 6 when tohru tells kyo that Isuzu will be staying at Kazuma’s, kyo responds that” then Master won’t feel lonely”. Meaning after his imprisonment. Huge gut wrenching moment since kyo doesnt know that tohru knows abt his imprisonment.

The anime chooses to displayed it in their mandatory style of “ kyoru-moment inside shigure house : which is widen the shot so much to include yuki & shigure & flatten the emotional impact to include other characters reaction that has nothing to do with the moment itself... They never consider zooming into the kyo-tohru reactions to their words, then widen the moment o include yuki, shigure, the tv, the woods, kyoko’s grave or the moon if they want to.. Complete lack of understanding of the emotional impact. This isn’t abt romantic lovey dovey moment. This is abt character development. The biggest loser i this design is : Tohru’s emotions. God, I hate how bland she is in the anime in regards to situations that affect HER.

Also, the anime chooses to squeeze in another moment here, which is kyo’s reaction to tohru’s grave visit & still lacks in showing the emotional depth even here & opted for what? yup! you guessed it. Widen the shot to include yuki & shigure. At this point I wonder why kyo & tohru didnt adopt yuki & shigure & took them with them in their house by the end of the story. To complete the tradition of these two poor guys witnessing everything..-_-’. Jokes aside, This doesn't just affect kyo-tohru. But also reflects badly at shigure & yuki. They become an unwanted third-wheels without proper plot or character driven reason. In good story-telling “ forced-third wheeling has a purpose!!”, such as to transfusion to the 3rd character moment or to be later used for the 3rd character driving emotional moment. not just a reminder that characters X & Y live here & therefore see this & that.. This is an example of missing the impactful design of the moment. I dont even understand how can someone miss such basic story-telling devices...

Lets look at only 3 panels from the manga:

See how in the above panels in the focus is on tohru’s emotions. This is Tohru’s focus why not show her emotions instead of her stupid wide eyed, new eye lashes face & zooming out on tohru to include yuki for no reason!!!!! The anime is capable of focusing on characters pain, we saw that wioth yuki dozens of times. The anime is capable of focusing on showing facial emotions, we saw this with kyo in all his focused eps! Why can’t they give tohru half of that.. Just look, she looks like spacing out thinking of what to cook~ lala~ gotta feed the boys.!! zoom out on her & her purpose on the story~~~~~

-The power of words is unbelievable~~

Kyo’s little sentence of being happy Isuzu will stay with kazuma, destroyed tohru. Look how the manga makes tohru continues to think abt it. You might wonder why will the author do this? The author is building towards tohru realizing her romantic love & uncovering her traumatic attachment to her mom. Reminds you of sth? the 6 or 7 eps that se02 dedicated to yuki where every sentence established his journey towards facing his emotions. In se02, yuki thought abt the words of many characters until he reached his conclusion. The anime refused to give tohru ONE sentence.

-Powerful Character-Influenced Moments:

The manga made rohru leave screaming abt wanting the curse to break before spring. Why? because (a) tohru must be giving time to think abt HERSELF, not the cat or the curse, so tohru wander around thinking abt her mom, we saw that in the anime. the the moment of shigure tells tohru abt the zodiacs ugly spirit & delight at seeing the cat suffers happens right before kyo finds crying tohru. Why? because (a) it was established that kyo will visit kazuma, so no weird out of no where lover finds lover in the streets for loving support moment, (b) to make kyo’s emotional support to tohru reasonable. In the anime, he saw her crying & comforted her assuming she cried cuz of the grave visit or sth, it was never hinted at anything, cuz kyo never gets any inner thoughts until it is his dramatic moments, but here he comforts her cuz he thinks she’s upset abt Isuzu, why oh why you write this thing out??????????????????????????????????

Not enough eps? but you gave motoko half an ep?!!! Why write off your main protagonist? I dont get it??? why intentional make tohru one-denominational character. Either yuki’s momma or a girl in love.... Is that what women are for the anime? a caring loving mothers & good lovers?

-Shigure’s words are to tohru are so watered down in the anime. Here he connects everything to the major plot of “ zodiacs turing into cute animals ” premise of the story, this is not sth cute as the early story made it out yo be. I love this!!!! why the anime cut it! Tohru screams when shigure brings an unavoidable question. Ask yuki & the the others whom tohru loves & believes they’re the kindest. Ask them of they KNOW kyo will be locked & are relieved! so cruel & shocking thing to thin abnt that shatters tohru’s world! shigure knows tohri will NEVER ask! so true to his character! epic moment! My best shigure-tohri moment! both of them NOT hiding anything & both in theit lowest moment!! INGENUOUS WRITING!!! so plot-worthy!!! WHY CUT IT!!!

Kyo finds tohru cuz he saw her sad! bringing the realistic aspect of story-telling & ditching the dunb superficial coincidence.

Look at how tohru uncovers her trauma little by little:

parallel between loosing her mom & loosing kyo. By showing this, the readers/ viwer will begin to be prepared to question tohru’s “ I cant love mom more than kyo”. The following chapters will for sure dive into this deeper, writing tohru as more understandably, more flawed., more real. Nothing like a the fixer for grown men, nothing like an angelic mom, nothing like the princess saved by the prince’s love. Basically, nothing like her shallow anime self.

Side Notes:

I was right abt the anime wanting to close Isuzu & Haru’s arc in ep 5, cuz in this chapter we have a lil scene that is the follow up with their plotline. Haru wanting to thank Kureno & asing Isuzu to never risk herself. It’s the little things that add depth to characters.. but I get it Haru in se03 can no longer support yuki cuz yuki have Kakeru, so his plotline is reduced to isuzu’s lover & that was closed in ep 5. Isuzu still had few things to add to the plot in ep 6 which is be tohru’s unfiltered deep talk partner.

The sad reality of the anime focusing on wide shots lost us yet another good emotional impact besides kyo-tohru moments. This time, we lost kazuma’s reaction to isuzu being held in cat’s room & haru/yuki’s reaction to kazuma’s sadness.. The anime gives us wide shot to include all the room. so,Screw haru & yuki’s reaction???.. they dont care abt the cat? is that it? nope, cuz this reasoning requires emotional depth of hate & disgust. The anime just loves wide shots “ so artistic~” but the real reason, the anime is flying in bullet speed in this ep to include as much as it can to save place for the “ new added moment of kyoru’s united shock” & still include the intro & outro... yep, ep6 is the weakest ep in design...

More on ep 6 in the following chapters, I guess. I’ll stop here this time. I’m so mad.. I’ll calm down & read the flowing two chapters later to articylate proper thoughts.

I hate hate how tohru was done so dirty! I’m loving everything abt her so far in the manga, but when I remember her in the anime! ugh! I still love kyo & yuki’s anime stories. But tohru, nope. I stopped loving her in se02 once the beach arc is over & she became a full mother to yuki & nothing more. I adore her character & she’s so endearing, but My God, she’s so bland in the anime, just the lightest version of her manga self... so light, it’s a shame she’s a protagonist...

I really wonder how manga readers feel abt the lack of tohru’s focus & lost emotional depth? is tohru even popular in the manga days? I know kyo is popular & i know lots adore yuli’s growth. but what abt tohru? I’m curious how manga readers felt watching her butchered arc in se03?

#Anime Only #Fruits Basket #fruits basket manga #manga spoilers #mad paper!#pissed off paper #poor tohru #the most butchered female protag...

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searchingforbucky · 4 years

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Fic Recs (Part 12) :)

Welcome to the ABO fic rec list! I just want to clarify this is not for werewolf AUs, this is A/B/O dynamic. This also has been highly recommended and I’m so sorry it took me so long, i was struggling about whether or not to include the smuts that are like, no plot lol. But I decided I will, they will just be separated. The first part is stories that are not solely focused on smut, and the second set are ones where smut drives the story. Its super long, I hope you guys like it :)

Heart & Soul by @all1e23

Okay so I know everyones read this, and if you haven’t……do it right now. But I feel like I would burst into flames if I didn’t include this. This story, is absolutely one of the best things I’ve ever read. I would read it 51284823 times if I could. The relationship between these two, is just the burst thing. Theres no ulterior motive, he loves her and will do anything he can to protect her, she is learning to love and trust him. There is nothing more beautiful. Its a slow burn, but thats what it should be. It perfectly builds their relationship into what it is now, which is something that I can only hope to get. Allie is an artist with all of her works, but this one is just so special.

Better Like This by @simam12

You know what else this has besides Alpha!Bucky???? Detective Bucky and reader! Hell YEs !!!! This story is fantastic, I Absolutely LOVE this premise and the slowish build of their relationship. And the badass omega!!! YES!!!!! Supportive yet protective Bucky!!! yEs!!! God its just so good!

Step With Me by @kentuckybarnes

if you want a slow burn that is fantastically good and has fluff, and slight angst? Ohhhh buddy is this the one for you. I love the reader’s personality and Bucky’s patience. It makes the slow build to love so so worth it. This is a A/B/O story that is about more then sex. It being about the right to choose who to be with, when to be with them, and in what capacity, and its beautiful.

Just Try by @waiting4inspiration

Oh man, now this one, what a series. So action-packed, so many twists and turns, any time you think things have calmed down? NOPE somethings gonna hurt lol. But its just so, so good. And its long so it has a lot of time to build these wonderful characters and this universe and this family, I miss getting updates for this, I was always so excited to find out what happened. I always love stories where the female lead is really independent and strong. Its nice to see. Super, super well done, highly recommend. Also check out their fic The Red Cloak

Some Alpha by @propertyofpoeandbucky

God I am straight up in love with this story. Its actually about Chubby Alpha Bucky and Beta reader which is so cool and unique, it’s always so awesome to find for different and this fic it’s just like the thing for me. Their dynamic is so cute, you have independent beta reader, insecure and infatuated bucky, it just leads to a love that so pure and not guided by power complexes and its actually really plot twisty lol. Love it.

Pint Sized Protection Squad by @shy-violet-soul

You wanna read probably the cutest most tooth rotting fluff ever? Well this is it. This is absolutely the fluffiest fluff to ever fluff, and its absolutely amazing. You get big protective bucky surrounded by pups and little babies being protective of the reader and bucky not knowing what to do, I cannot even begin to explain how close I got to legitimately squealing.

Bound To My Broken Soul by @captain-ariel-barnes

I love this one, I just really like stories that give a glimpse into the Winter Soldier. He is aggressively soft in this, which may be OOC but who cares I love it lol. You juts really feel for Bucky, you want to give him a hug and let him be happy. He is such a sweet boy who gets so much bad thrown at him :( anyways, super well done fic, absolutely loved it.

Not My Scent by @stevenssrogers

We love a jealous!bucky and possessive!bucky ! I love mutual pining stories too! And this is the cutest combination of them. Bucky is crushing hard on his girl, his girl is crushing hard on him back, are they gonna do anything about it? Of course not! Not until bucks jealousy overrides his common sense lol. This story is just really cute, really well done, and the dynamic between ALL of the characters is really fitting. (Im talking about Tony messing with Buck lol)

By Chance by @green-eyeddragonfanfiction

My heart! My soul! This was, just, perfectly beautiful. So well balanced with emotion. It’s completely unrushed and captivating. The dynamic between bucky and threader is perfect, we need more independence and actually choosing to invest in a relationship instead of the author basically forcing them into one lol. SO awesome, and so well done.

Project lure by @itscaptainyoulittlemaggot

This one was so unique, and I really like the rawness of it. It represented the situation and subject really well, there was no romanticizing but it was still a beautiful story. super awesome. Broke and forced to choose between food and your suppressants, you sign up for a drug trial that promises a lifetime supply along with a fat pay check. However, all is not as it seems as you unwittingly become caught up in Hydra’s latest experiment

Did You Just Growl by @welldonebeca

This is a short but sweet, and funny Drabble. I love seeing protective Bucky with a crush, its adorable. It makes me want to wrap him up in a blanket and never let go. Love this.

Okay, so these are the smuts. its hard for me to fic rec smut, because I don’t know what to say other than its written well and its hot lol. SO I’m gonna include the summaries so you guys know what its about. I hope thats okay :)

Too Close by @theycallmebucky

Alpha!Bucky lends a hand to Omega!Reader during her heat. Hell yeah Bucky is a perfect alpha, the second I read the first line I was all in haha. We all know I love protective possessive bucky and ohhhhh baby is this a great example. He wants to help his girl, who isn’t really is girl lol. This one was really well written, detailed, and not rushed.

Accident or Fate? By @asirenscalling

This one is so cute. Its not smut with no plot, but It is over half smut id say. I don’t know what it is about like, weird fated get togethers that just automatically make a story a favorite, but it really does. I loved how this one isn’t like, we accidentally mated so lets just tough it out, like they had this genuine connection. The sun was nice too if you know what I mean lol. One morning you, an omega, wake up next to the an alpha you only met the night before with a bonding mark on your neck. What are you going to do now?

Comfort by @thottybarnes

This one I loved because there was just this awesome dynamic between the characters. You see them before the smut, and he really just cares for the reader, he wants her to be okay and happy and this smut wasn’t driven by anything other than wanting to make his girl feel good. Jealous/possessive Bucky comforts you, his (not yet) omega that is struggling with the results of a recent mission.

Animals Awaken by @221bshrlocked

This one isn’t mainly smut, but its filthy lol, so I needed to add it here haha. Really good though, I loved the sort of enemies to lovers vibe, its all about that sexual tension yo! Bucky forgets to take his suppressants in time during a mission with you. You offer your help but he rejects, afraid that he’d hurt you because it’s his first rut since decades. And well, you know the rest. Also check out the start of their other fic called Thought You Were Mine

The Chase by @firewolf-marvels

This one is really cool, I like the thriller aspect of the first part, and then you find out that its like, a thing in their relationship. It really sets up the dynamic of their relationship well. Werewolf AU. You’re being chased and it ends up getting heated

Alpha by @misssavenger

You go into heat earlier than you had anticipated. This one is basically all smut, but that doesn’t mean its not good! Its really good! And sweet, and really well written. I love the fact that Bucky didn’t want to take advantage of her, but they’re meant to be together so its okay lol.

Alpha, Please by @welldonebeca

This one is super good, and its an Omega!Bucky!! So Cool! Bucky experiences his first heat after being held captive for so long. You help him, and you finally mate.

Do You Want To Have An Alpha by @welldonebeca

Here they are again with another awesome unique pairing, this one is Beta!Reader. When you confess to Bucky that you’ve never been with an Alpha, he offers to show you what it feels like.

And even though I know its not Bucky, theres this really awesome Alpha!Chris Beck story by @after-avenging-hours called Stardust that I HIGHLY recommend.

I hope you all love these fics as much as I do! :)

#bucky x you #bucky x y/n #bucky fic #bucky barnes #bucky #bucky barns imagine #bucky barnes smut #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes au #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes fic #searchingforbucky #ficrecs #abo verse #bucky barnes abo #alpha!bucky

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dangermousie · 4 years

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Apparently he got a nasty leg wound fighting the white wolf and is now getting stitched with no anesthetics, not even some booze or a stick between the teeth. Murder Puppy, you love her so much and are totally willing to risk death for her. It’s a pity you will not learn until it is too late that you cannot have your cake (made out of dead bodies of her fam and friends) and eat it (ahem ahem) too.

And then we get a little flashback as to how he killed the wolf and he is literally by himself (presumably using the entourage to flush out a whole giant wolf pack) and kills it with dagger and bow string!!!! That is freaking INSANE.

But the thing is, this says such volumes about Murder Puppy on a basic level, and I am not even talking about “he loves her more than life” stuff. To me, it also says two other very interesting things. One, he is a driven perfectionist with a very idiosyncratic view of what’s fair. I mean, this is the man who infiltrates a kingdom he intends to slaughter and befriends a bunch of people he plans to kill or capture. That is not a man big on the traditional concept of above board and fair play. Yet, he kills that wolf all by himself - there was nobody to see what he did and how he got it - he could have ordered a small armored group to go herd it in and kill it for him, and he can claim he did it himself. Not like his underlings will expose the lie in front of a secretive nomad tribe. But he totally abides by the rules set even though there is nobody to see it because (a) I think he wants to prove to himself he can do it and (b) it’s for Xiaofeng and she is always his one exception - she’s worth it, basically, he wants to win her properly because she deserves to be won and it will show both of them he is worthy. The second, related, thing is - the man has no stops! He not only doesn’t need to kill the wolf himself, he doesn’t need to do anything - shortly thereafter all the rules set by grandpa are to become obsolete as is grandpa himself. And it’s not as if she’d be married off in the meantime. If he does absolutely nothing, she will probably be his wife anyway since he will be appointed Crown Prince and she goes with that position, pretty much. But nope, that’s not how he does it. He does a suicidally brave thing to win her “properly” and goes all out. The thing is, this no breaks quality is also the one that causes the tragedy because it means he has no brakes about anything - vengeance, plans, murder. Seriously. It’s the same extreme that drives him to do his utmost in an ultimately meaningless, in any way but emotional, challenge, that actually leads to tragedy and deaaaaaattttthhhh.

#cdrama #goodbye my princess #good bye my princess

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ardeawritten · 3 years

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Halo 4

The game-player in me is thrilled with the very pretty levels, new weapons, flashy enemies and more creative, less linear methods of level progression/interaction. Lovely soundtrack as always, though the random peppy upbeat music overlaid on a race-to-save earth battle is still hilarious. This game was fun and enjoyable to play, a great few evenings' worth of distraction and some nice catharsis for a little current-events-related attitude. The last quarter felt like a meat-grinder slog, but then, it's endgame of an FPS. What else is it going to be?

The writer in me is rolling their eyes.

(there’s an whole essay under the cut) ((I really hope these cuts work on all platforms, if not I am sincerely sorry; it’s like a thousand words long))

Ok, so the first three games were a fairly standard blank-slate FPS protagonist. Play as an armored super-soldier fighting to save Humanity from the Monsters, with a Sexy AI Sidekick and some Battle Buddies. Not what I'd call high art in gaming, but I can understand its popularity and the enduring appeal of a simple, straight-forward "if it moves shoot it" style of play. No escort missions, no puzzles, really no boss battles requiring tricks and analysis. Just "if that didn't kill it, keep shooting or use a bigger gun."

Writing-wise, there's not a lot of characterization but overall Indications that MC is well-recognized, well-liked, has a sense of humor and a camaraderie with his co-workers, is pals with his Sexy AI and is a generally level-headed person-shaped brick. It's an early 2000's Military FPS, it's not about the characters, it's about role-playing as an indestructible military hero who always saves the girl. It's the game equivalent of John Carter of Mars-genre action hero stories (books, not movie.) This does not absolve it of the crime of woman-as-sexy-or-dead, but it is par for the course.

So on to game #4.

This game was released in late 2012, in a post-Mass Effect gaming market. #4 has a ME2/3 feel to it, which makes sense. They're both very popular flashy scifi action games with similar graphics/design feel (and with Sexy AIs but that's another conversation about the literally unreal 'idealization' of womanhood in a male-dominated creator/created space!)

It opens with the storyline revelation that MC is a brainwashed and conditioned child-soldier, alleges he's got some issues with performing basic human functions and clarifies that Cortana's existence is the "band-aid" applied to that problem. On the MC side, Cortana's expiration date has passed and she's fragging out, giving MC a personal reason to want to get home. This combines to give the player a sense of urgency- if Cortana dies, it's not just "sad," it's "MC will lose his band-aid and all his humanity will bleed out." This is also I think the first time the POV is, narratively-speaking, third-person (we know things MC doesn't or couldn't know) instead of solely first-person (I'm not counting Arbiter’s story as breaking first-person, as it's still limited to player character POV.)

As a Writer, here's my issues:

- MC is given a traumatic backstory as a brainwashed child-soldier to what? Justify a damaged emotional state, as if emotional wounding and isolation isn't a very common, very human point to reach after having experienced and participated in war at any age? Justify being unable to function without Cortana’s hand-holding? And then the game never goes back and addresses that opening cut-scene.

- Cortana's existence had a built-in, known expiration, but she was still (retconned?) created to provide MC his primary band-aid. Either this was extremely short-sighted of the Spartan R&D team, or MC likewise was expected to expire on the same timeline. There's no talk of planning ahead for this problem that would render an extremely expensive asset fundamentally useless. (ok there’s Cortana’s “they’ll pair you with someone else but it won’t be me” line, but that isn’t exactly smoothing the transition any.)

- We the audience/player now know Cortana's death will have personal, negative repercussions on the MC's health outside of grief and trauma over loss of a friend and partner. She exists solely for his benefit, and must continue existing for his benefit, and the plot's urgency driven forward by his need to continue benefiting. It's not about saving Cortana, it's about saving MC. This would be fine if her character existence was framed as "computer service program," but it isn't. Prior to this game, narrative and gameplay repeatedly tells the audience she's a character and not just MC's security blanket.

- The above, coupled with her "stock naked lady sexy" design, has Implications of how the writing team figured they could fit a female character into their narrative. So far we have A) woman who fails to complete a heroic sacrifice and is shot in the back and dies pointlessly, B) woman whose visual and intellectual existence is tailored solely to benefit the MC and has no autonomy outside of that existence and C) woman as 'fallen mother/evil crone' who perpetrated the brainwashing on the MC. (Female Spartan in the mammoth got a whole three lines; female scientist with a bag of nukes? She… died pointlessly.)

(I swear I did not intend this to be an analysis of female roles in the Halo main game franchise but hey, my first memorable introduction to the FPS genre was Mysteries of the Sith where, playing as female jedi Mara Jade, you save the guy by making him acknowledge the value of a non-romantic peer relationship! That game was made in 1997.)

For Cortana, in 1 I got the impression she was a shipboard AI like EDI in Mass Effect, not an AI specific to MC. Her characterization feels like it's been shifted each game from a warship AI capable of coordinating fleet-wide maneuvers and going toe-to-toe with Guilty Spark to a cowering captive of Gravemind needing physical rescue to a Pocket Pal for MC to cover for his emotional shortcomings and inability to interact with technology more complex than "a button."

Having an AI programmed to be essentially a therapy dog or social caretaker, and exploring the complexities of that role related to the invisible and unquantifiable damage violence visits on the human body and brain would be a very interesting story. An AI designed for coordinating war on a massive scale who despite "winning" each battle finds its platform systematically reduced until the only "ship and crew" left are just one person would also be an interesting story! Why are we left with "my girlfriend's dying and I'm going to starve because she's the only one who knows how to cook."

tl;dr: the opening cutscene was detrimental to the plot, characterization and world-building. The game would have been fine as a story about a soldier coming to terms with his best friend’s inevitable death while trying to save the planet, and would have preserved Cortana’s game 1 identity as an autonomous AI who lost her ship and partnered up with MC of her own free will. The ending of “we saved each other, if just for a little while, and will grieve but will continue on” would have been stronger IMO than “I’m going to save you-I’m going to save you-NOPE.”

#text post #long post #long text post #long ass essay text post writing rant #also why does she get more naked with every game #I mean I know why from a revenue standpoint but what's the in-world justification #here let me beat what I'm sure is a very dead horse because I'm eight years late to the party #don't worry there's a tl;dr in there at the end #does anyone else remember the AI in Flubber who fell in love with the MC and then gets mashed and copies herself?#because that was a more satisfying character arc #Ardea Plays Halo

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lovemesomesurveys · 4 years

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1. List 5 things you want to do before the year ends. I’d love to just be able to go to the beach and relax, but that won’t happen. That was the only place I could feel relaxed. Beaches have reopened, but the hours are limited and you can’t just sit/lay there like you used to be able to. You can only walk around. And anyway, the fact we’re still very much in the thick of this whole thing I don’t feel safe or comfortable going places yet or being around people. I wouldn’t feel relaxed at all.

2. What color are your pants? I’m wearing black leggings.

3. Favorite motivational quote. Meh.

4. When was the last time you drank coffee? I’m drinking a Starbucks Doubleshot energy drink, which as the can says is a “energy coffee beverage.”

5. What was the last thing you ate? Ramen.

6. Favorite animal. Giraffes! <<< Aww, saaaame. And doggos. (:

7. Favorite song. I couldn’t just choose one favorite.

8. Last movie you watched? I’m completely blanking at the moment in regards to the last movie, but I’ve binged a lot of a couple shows on Netflix recently.

9. Any turn ons? Nice smelling cologne.

10. Any turn offs? Cockiness and arrogance.

11. List 4 big words off of the top of your head. Claustrophobia, arachnophobia, agoraphobia, tryphophobia.

12. What are some meaningful movies? Hmm.

13. 2 most important people in your life right now? God and my family. Yep, I’m grouping my family cause I couldn’t just choose 2.

14. What are 3 things you want to do before the month ends? Let’s be real- I won’t be doing anything.

15. When was the last time you read a good book? I’m almost done with one called, “Never Walk Alone” by Willow Rose.

16. How long do you study for usually, if you study? I spend about 20 minutes to an hour when doing my Bible studies.

17. Do you have any nicknames? Just Steph and Sis.

18. Favorite kind of perfume? (fruity, alluring, etc.) I like certain fruity and sweet ones, ones with patchouli, and beachy and autumnal scents from B&BW.

19. Do you have any international friends / friends who live out of state? Those of us in this survey community live all over.

20. What is something unique that you do every single day? Probably that I have a bowl of ramen of every night.

21. If there was a movie based on your life, what would it be called? A series of unfortunate events <– Pretty damn accurate. Lmao. <<< Lol, I’ve made that joke before, too. I also find it quite fitting for my life.

22. When was the last time you bought a gift for someone? Last month.

23. Are you a shopaholic? I was. My online shopping got out of hand the last few years, too. However, I’ve actually been pretty good this year so far.

24. What are some songs that always make you feel better? Upbeat and catchy songs help in the moment. Sad, emo, relatable songs can help as well, though. Sometimes just shouting along to “I’m Not Okay” saying, “I’M NOT OKAY, I’M NOT O-FUCKING-KAY!” or something can feel good. ha. Need some good angst.

25. List 3 activities that you can only enjoy by yourself. Surveys, reading, and listening to ASMR.

26. If you could live in any biome (and survive) which biome would you live in? I don’t think I’d last long in any biome.

27. How do you like being roused in the morning? Uh, I don’t.

28. How was your day? What did you do? It’s only about 330 in the morning, but so far it’s been fine. I’ve had my bowl of ramen, scrolled some through Tumblr, watched YouTube videos, and now I’m doing surveys and listening to ASMR.

29. What did your last text message say? I sent my brother a TikTok video that reminded me of our doggo.

30. Do you respond to texts quickly? It depends.

31. Who was the last person you called? My mom.

32. List 5 things that are on your wish list. I don’t knowwww.

33. If you were famous, what do you think you would be famous for? I wouldn’t be famous. I’m not that special or talented. <<< Same. I don’t want to be famous anyway.

34. Winter or summer? Winter, HANDS DOWN.

35. What is a quality that all people should have? Empathy would be great.

36. If you could have a large collection of one item, what would that item be? I already have a large collection of giraffe stuffed animals, books, key chains, and graphic tees. I don’t have room for more.

37. What have you been thinking about lately? My mind is always a jumbled mess with a lot of stuff that is always on my mind from my health, family, and just life in general. But this year has and continues to give me a lot to think about as well.

38. What is the secret to a happy life? Ha, you’re asking the wrong person.

39. What are some phrases you say often? I know I have my many “Stephanieisms”, but I always seem to blank when asked this question.

40. Favorite food? Ramen, scrambled eggs with shredded cheese, spinach, and green onion, Wingstop garlic parm and lemon pepper boneless wings, spaghetti and meatballs, pasta salads, pesto pasta, deli sandwiches, and baked potatoes.

41. List 3 wishes. I feel like you’ve asked me this in different ways a few times now.

42. What are some of your greatest fears? Losing my loved ones, death, never getting better/getting worse, never doing anything with my life and just wasting away...stuff like that.

43. What is the last thing you downloaded onto your computer? Some stuff for the last Bible study I did.

44. Most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen (in real life)? Beautiful beaches and mountainous areas. I went on a gondola last year that took us up over 9,000ft and the views were breathtaking.

45. Spicy food:Like or dislike? I used to be obSESSED with spicy food, but I haven’t been able to eat it for a few years now due to some health reasons. It sucks. :/

46. Scary movies:Like or dislike? I love ‘em. I used to be a big baby, but I did a complete switch a few years ago.

47. Do you like to travel? Yes.

48. Any regrets? I have a lot of those.

49. Do you like rain? I love the rain.

50. What do you spend most of your money on? It used to be food or clothes, but this year I haven’t been doing a lot of shopping.

51. Would you rather visit the past or the future? Past.

52. Favorite clothing store? Hot Topic and BoxLunch.

53. What is the best advice you can give to those who are feeling down? I’m always feeling down, so I’m not the one to ask about that either.

54. How often do you think about your future? Does it scare you? The future terrifies me. My mind is more wrapped up in current and past stuff.

55. What angers you the most? Injustice and corruption.

56. When was the last time you got majorly angry? In my personal life, it’s been awhile since I’ve been angry. I get irritated and frustrated very easily, though.

57. When was the last time you got really sad? Sadness is one of my personality traits.

58. Are you good at lying? I used to be when it came to lying and downplaying about myself like with how I’m doing and really feeling, but my emotions took control. I still downplay and leave things out, but it’s obvious I’m not doing well.

59. What foreign language would you like to learn? I’d like to be fluent in Spanish. I’ve been wanting to brush up and start practicing again.

60. How many languages can you speak and what are they? I’m only fluent in English, but I can speak some Spanish.

61. How often do you go to parties? If you don’t, what do you do instead? I stay at home.

62. What books do you plan to read this year? I’ve read several this year and I plan to read several more.

63. Do you have breakfast every morning? Nope. Very rarely these days since I sleep until like 3PM everyday. Sometimes I’ll have breakfast foods for a late lunch or dinner, though.

64. Tell us a secret. Nah.

65. How many concerts have you been to? Seven.

66. Last hug? My doggo. I haven’t hugged a person in months.

67. Who knows you better than anyone else? You guys, probably. ha.

68. Baths or showers? Showers.

69. Do you think you’re ambitious? I haven’t been for a long time...

70. What song is stuck in your head? None at the moment.

71. Countries you’ve visited? Mexico. Besides my own, of course.

72. What do you most value in your friends? Understanding and low maintenance. 73. What helps you to sleep better? Listening to/watching ASMR can help.

74. What is the most money you have ever held in your hand? 1k.

75. What makes you nervous? A lot of things. 76. What is the best advice you’ve ever been given? Hmm.

77. Is it easier to forgive or forget? I always forgive but never forget. <<<

78. First mobile phone? A gray Motorola flip phone.

79. Strangest dream? I have a lot of those.

80. Best dream? Hmm.

81. Who is the smartest person you know? My younger brother.

82. Who is the prettiest person on tumblr? All of you.

83. Do you miss anyone right now? Loved ones who have passed away.

84. Who do you love? Why? I love my family. They’re my everything.

85. Do you like sharing? Sharing what?

86. What was the last picture you took with your phone? Probably of my doggo.

87. Is there a reason behind everything that happens? I believe so.

88. Favorite genre of music? I like variety. 89. If you had one word to describe yourself, what would it be? Mess.

90. Describe your life in 5 words. Nahhh.

91. Describe the world in 4 words. Nahhh.

92. Craziest thing you’ve ever done? I’m boring.

93. First three songs in your favorite playlist? I’m not checking right now.

94. Are you more creative or logical? Logical. I wish I was creative.

95. Would you rather lie or hurt someone with the truth? I mean, it kind of depends. If it’s something serious and they need to know, then I’d have to tell them even though it would be hard and could hurt them.

96. What are you most proud of? I don’t feel proud of myself for anything.

97. What personality trait do you admire in other people? Those who are driven.

98. When you imagine yourself as really, really relaxed and happy, what are you doing? I’m at the beach, just staring out into the ocean while listening to the waves crash in and out and feeling the cool ocean air on my face, breathing it in.

99. How do you usually start a conversation? I usually don’t, ha. But I suppose with a “hey” or something of the sort.

100. What is the best news you could hear right now? That it was all just a horrible dream. <<< Oh man. If only.

#personal #text #survey #surveys

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zayashmaya · 5 years

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some marvus angst alphabet headcanons

im bored and feeling some type of way so lets get truckin’ folks

a - accident (would they blame themselves if you died in an accident?)

- absolutely, marvus has a savior complex that’s quite beforus-style due to how he perceives purplebloods and their role in society. he wants to be the protector for his lover, and failing to do so would shatter his high opinion of himself regarding his ability to keep them safe. his mind will constantly be flooded with thoughts of how he could have done things differently, if he had just had security follow you around, or kept you locked away safely in his hive, none of this would have happened. he should have known better - alternia is a dangerous place. b - break up (how would they deal with one?)

- aloof, aloof, aloof. at worst, he would play it off as though he didn’t really care, and at best he would be understanding and try to remain friends (although he quickly realizes he can’t do that, it hurts too much, so he ghosts his ex). marvus isn’t the type to date officially to begin with, and if he does then he goes all in. breaking up would have him revisiting where things went wrong. little, random things would remind him of his ex, and he would find himself missing them. c - crying (are they much of a crier?)

- nope, he cried when he was a wiggler if he skinned his knee or something but ever since he embarked on a career in entertainment, he learned to keep his true feelings to himself. d - death (how do they deal with any death?)

- he is very, very good at handling death. he’s a killer himself, and surrounds himself with death on a daily basis. the clown cult taught him early in life to get rid of his discomfort with dead bodies and murder and all that fun stuff, so by now he is utterly desensitized and looks upon it with mild disinterest. - if someone he loves dies, that’s a different story. first of all, it is hard for him to openly love someone to begin with. so if someone manages to break down that barrier, all of those teachings from clown church fly out the window. if his lover dies, he will bear this burden for the rest of his life, and it will be a weight that cannot ever be lifted. he will be more violent during his concerts, more erratic with his work life, drowning himself in hedonism to help himself forget the pain and loneliness, but it will never go away. e - emotion (what’s the emotion they tend to push away the most?)

- sadness. marvus haaaaaates moping around and thinking about stuff that upset him. he thinks he could do far more productive things, and he certainly works himself to the bone or hangs out with his friends to distract himself. this dude rarely deals with his own feelings, despite how introspective he tends to be. f - frustrated (how much would it take to push them off the edge?)

- i feel like it varies. if things are going well for marvus, he doesn’t usually get pissed, he’d probably take it all in stride and figure things out with a level head. but if he’s already in a bad place, then adding to the situation will make him frustrated and grouchy. g - great pain (what is the most painful thing they have witnessed?)

- the first time he witnessed a lowblood being sacrificed at church. he still remembers the begging and screaming. h - humiliation (how could they be humiliated?)

- if someone looks down on him. i think this is where his hatred of sea dwellers comes from; he doesn’t like feeling like someone is better than him, especially when they haven’t earned that status. being forced to submit to the whims of his superiors is something that pisses him off more than anything. i - injured (how do they handle themselves when injured?)

- shrugs it off, no matter what. we saw a classic example of that during his bad end after his limo exploded, and despite him eventually acknowledging he got hurt more than he thought, he still looked at the brighter side of things. j - jittery (which part of their past makes them flinch or even worked up?)

- genuine intimacy. he is totally unfamiliar with it. pailing and sensuality, he has no problem with. violence, no biggie. but vulnerability and expressions of love? he’s ready to simultaneously crawl out of his skin and yet chase after those caresses. he’ll get accustomed to them eventually, and once he’s comfortable with intimacy, you best believe he will be the biggest cuddle bug. k - kill (would they kill for revenge?)

- marvus prides himself on his self-control. he allows murder and mayhem at his concerts, and even instigates them, because all of this is done at his discretion. killing for revenge out in the open would make him feel like he lost that self-control, which he is loathe to do. so i think he would handle matters personally, either one-on-one where no one else can see and the camera crew is gone, or he will hire an assassin to do his dirty work. l - loss (what was their greatest loss?)

- i imagine he might have had close lowblood friends among his profession when he first started, and he was probably forced into a situation where they got killed in a match with him during slam or get culled. m - mistakes (how much do they want to fix the mistakes of their past?)

- marvus is probably the type to have very few regrets. he believes that everything that’s happened to him has taught him an important lesson, so changing the past would change his perspective and who he currently was. o - outrage (what makes them angry?)

- needless to say, cocky sea dwellers who overstep his boundaries and make him feel like shit. also people who invade his privacy. he puts a lot of effort into letting the public see what he wants them to see, so if someone goes the extra mile to breach the very little privacy he has left for himself, he’s gonna be livid. he also has absolutely no tolerance for anyone daring to insult his lover in any way. someone will lose their life for that.

p - pressure (what stresses them out to the breaking point?)

- honestly, i think he would never lose his composure like that in his line of work. it’s the issues that might arise in his private life that he will be unprepared to handle, since he tends to leave things unspoken and doesn’t deal with issues head-on. so when the tension between him and his lover starts to overflow, he doesn’t know how to handle it because he never learned coping mechanisms or how to properly analyze his feelings. basically, his own feelings will overwhelm him. q - qualify (what part of themselves do they see as dangerous?)

- his charm mixed with his detached facade. marvus thinks that chuckle voodoos are only a small part of what makes him dangerous. his ability to win over anyone through his personality and manipulate them into doing what he wants is what he considers to be his strongest asset. t - time (what if they had limited time to live?)

- if single, marvus immediately comes to terms with it and spends his time doing what he loves, making music and making his fans happy. if taken, he will still accept his fate to some degree, and he would stay strong for his lover until the very end. but deep down, he wishes he had more time with them. so he spends his last days entirely in their company. they are all that matters to him. u - urge (how badly do they get the urge to see you after separating?)

- if he goes on tour, the first few days, maybe week, is easy peasy. marvus is very independent and driven, and when he has a lot of duties to attend to, he will absolutely focus on them. but once he starts thinking about his lover, how he misses their warmth and laughter, it’s like a switch is flipped. he starts getting antsy about getting back to them. there’s definitely a whole lot of texting (sexting too for sure), phone calls, you name it, he even buys them a bunch of gifts for them. - if his lover is the one who goes somewhere and he has little to occupy himself with, he’s going to be THE neediest bitch on the planet, and he will try to convince you to come back as soon as possible if he can. sends them lots of texts about how much he misses them. when his lover returns, he’s waiting at the door like a housewife watching her soldier husband return from war. in both instances, he’s gonna need at least a week of your undivided attention. v - vent (how do they get rid of feelings they find unnecessary?)

- he raps about his problems! that’s how the feels jam sessions go for him (with chixie ok, there’s no one else better equipped to handle this situation). y - yearning (do old memories make them yearn for your touch?)

- he thinks about the first time you ran your fingers through his hair, when you stroked his bare cheek after he removed his face paint for the first time in your presence, the way your fingers graze along his alien features and committing them to memory, little things like this that he always remembers and craves more of.

#homestuck #friendsim #marvus xoloto #headcanons

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theasiantvshipper-blog · 5 years

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The Shadowhunters 3x19 “Aku Cinta Kamu” Theories

So apparently, all the reviewers who got their screeners of the episode are already done watching them and have started to answer fan questions on Twitter and on Tumblr and a recently released (but very sketchy) synopsis of 3x21 is out somewhere sending the entire Malec fandom into a frenzy (I'll get into that later). But after having viewed all the possible spoilers and asked all possible no-spoilery questions to the reviewers themselves, here's what I think will go down in 3x19. It's only a few hours away (more like a day, really) before we actually see the episode but I'd like to put my thoughts into writing just in case:let's start with the facts first from 3x18:

Alec broke up with Magnus to get his magic back

Clary is now Dark Clary

Sizzy almost happened

They are still trying to make Maia and Jordan happen (but why?)

Now let's proceed with the spoilers from the reviewers:

Aku Cinta Kamu will only be said in a flashback- we all saw it. Don't your hold your breath on it.

There will be no present time Malec scenes, everything will be flashbacks- because this is supposed to be Magnus' episode, and also because Alec is busy trying to save evil twin Clary with Jace. Now before you brush Alec off and say he's not hurting as much as Magnus, he is. But if we all know how Alec is, he gets himself with work so he doesn't have to confront the pain. Magnus is the opposite and that's why this episode is so character driven because you see both of them back in their old ways, their old habits.

There will be a Madzie scene with Alec and Magnus and they will talk about having kids- go on Twitter, it's already blowing up.

Asmodeus will give Magnus magic back without pretense- as evidenced in the trailer. As to how and what he will tell Magnus for giving his magic back is left to be unknown.

Jem or BZ will be in the episode to erase Alec's memories- but he won't.

Sizzy will happen (finally)- there will be a kiss as per the reviewers

Team Evil- will be in all its glory, for now.

Jace and Clary will be drugged and do things only consenting adults do- You know what it is.

One reviewer said that there is blatant foreshadowing in one of the scenes, she didn't mention what it was, but I'm pretty sure that means world-ending.

Jonathan is jealous of Jace and Clary's relationship. Still gives me the creeps. He still doesn't trust Jace, but whats new?

Asmodeus will "try to be the father" he never was to Magnus, for good and bad reasons. One reviewer said that we will grow to love and hate Asmodeus' role in all of this.

Magnus will cry a lot in this episode, the flashbacks good or bad, won't be of any help either. He is just as devastated the morning after the breakup. Like any regular person would be.

Magnus will be the star of the show. As I expected, an episode titled Aku Cinta Kamu should feature the character who said it, regardless of context and I am glad we are getting more Magnus scenes this episode. He deserves it. It gives his character even more depth, so that we understand what Alec never will. That Magnus' love for Alec is worthy dying for, even without his magic. Someone send Alec a fire message stat!

Now that we got all of the spoilers away, here are my thoughts about what's to come in the episode: First of all, I am pissed. The title of the episode is "Aku Cinta Kamu" an iconic line in the book by Magnus Bane to Alec. And we only get to hear that in a flashback? Someone fire the writer of this episode! Stat! Kidding aside, with the flashbacks confirmed as the only Malec scenes in this episode, only reinforces the level of commitment the show has to these characters. And before you chastise me for saying that, let me say this: this episode we will see Magnus shine, havent we been asking for a Magnus-centric plot ever since? We will see him take his story into his own hands. He will take his narrative back and for a character who went from B-plot to A-plot that means a lot. Magnus has always been "the other half of the Malec" ship, even when he was introduced to us in the first season, he was already being setup to be the other half of Malec. But Magnus is more than that, he's lived for centuries, he's wise, and he's a good character. He is probably my favorite character in the entire TMI series because of the layers that he has. And for us to be seeing that unravel, despite the circumstances, is really beautiful. Granted that we will not like what we see, with Asmodeus in the picture, but if there's anything we can learn from this episode is that the relationship of Asmodeus and Magnus can never be severed. He is his father, and he is his son. A father does not turn his back on his son and this might just be what we see in this episode, albeit Asmodeus ulterior motives to get Magnus back to Edom with him. But one of the reviewers said that he will do something we will hate to love, because as i said, at the end of the day, Asmodeus only wants the best for his son and for him, that is to rule Edom beside him. He doesn't see any more than that, and I can't blame him, he is a Prince of Hell. What do you expect from a manipulative prick right? Now I know what y'all are thinking, but Magnus is so vulnerable right now, with Alec gone his entire world is crushing in on him and fast- think of it this way- when a person hits rock bottom- there's really no other way but up, right? The same applies to Magnus and Alec, they are in their lowest points after the breakup, which means things can only get better from hereon end. And that's more than enough for us to be hopeful about. Remember, this is the shadow world, it always gets worst, before it gets better.,Some would argue that Alec had the better deal, he has his parabatai, his family and the Institute. I can't comment on this without seeing the actual episode but even if there is no indication of him in the episode where he mourns for the loss of Magnus in his life, the reviewers pointed out, he is back to his old Alec ways- keeping himself busy when things go awry. And truth be told, isn't that what we all do when things hit a rough patch? We hope that the craziness of everyday life will save us from the miseries of the night.He is hurting, we just don't get to see it, because it's uncharacteristic of him to show us. This is Alec Lightwood we're talking about. The rest of the episode, as the reviewers have pointed out will be Team Evil, and Sizzy finally happening. Duh. It's about time! This slowburn for Sizzy isn't really doing any good for anyone, I love me some Sizzy but this show has taken forever to build that relationship that I'd say they're a bit too late to the party, but hey, who knows, I might be wrong. As for Team Evil, we all know that they will be out doing some evil stuff somewhere in the world, getting high on drugs and doing things that only adults should be doing in the privacy of their homes, but nope, they decided that part of being Dark Clary means being risque as well. I'm here for it, but please do it tastefully. I have high hopes for this scene. Now, onto more interesting things- as one of writers of the show pointed out, 3x19 is alternately titled "The Betrayal". Now before we jump ship that this is Malec, this could very well be a Clace storyline. Really, people, Malec already had their fair share of angst last episode, I think another betrayal in the horizon would be too low a blow, even for the writers of the show. So this must be a Clace storyline- with Jonathan finding out that Jace has been spying on them for the Shadowhunters. But that's just me being hopeful that there'll be no more angst fest with Malec before 3x20 because we can only take so much before we break. My best guess on how this episode ends would be Magnus asking Jem to erase his memories, Asmodeus swoops in making him a deal he knows Magnus can't refuse and we see Magnus contemplating on it by the end of the episode. I hope Jem talks some sense into Magnus, because a person in his emotional state making decisions, we all know too well how that goes for anyone. The reviewers have already pointed out that Magnus does not end up with Asmodeus in Edom in this episode and he does not find out about the deal in this episode- and there's only one person that knows about this deal next to Alec and Asmodeus- Izzy. She could very well be the key to solving this puzzle next episode. As to how that would happen, is still left to be seen. Let's hope the promo for 3x20 shed some light on that. I haven't seen enough 3x20-3x22 spoilers to formulate my own theories but with the recently released synopsis of 3x21, let's hope the Malec wedding happens in real time and not just in a dream sequence.

#sh spoilers #malec #shadowhunters #aku cinta kamu

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voidsoull · 5 years

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good good kink meme // james buchanan barnes

ROMANCE/AFFECTION: lbr bucky is an incredibly romantic person– either with people hes in a relationship or not. he likes the idea of lavishing someone in romantic gestures and affections, he likes to make it clear how he feels about a person– even in fact, if that dynamic is platonic. so long as the other person is comfortable, he is more than happy to be what is dubbed as ‘romantic’ toward even friends. he is very expressive in his emotions and how he loves people. however, when actually in a romantic and/or sexual relationship with someone it manifests in some variety of different ways, but furthermore he gets a different kind of pleasure from indulging someone. in the same way, when in a relationship with someone, he also gets a different kind of pleasure from receiving romantic and affection gestures. whereas in platonic/non relationship instances, the pleasure is entirely different.

HANDJOB/FINGERING: bucky really likes fingering his partners specifically– especially when in a position to be at eye level with that person. to force them to look at him, to see and hear and feel their reactions. in a similar respect, someone he trusts fingering him till he cums?? good shit !! DEEPTHROAT: tbh he hella enjoys the sound of someone deepthroating him and like holding their head, affectionately stroking their cheek etc– but also fucking into their mouth like yiiisss. on the flipside, he has a reasonable gag reflex, but often gets watery eyes when doing it– but he hella enjoys the aesthetic of that/how he looks for that person. plus bucky is a Thirsty Boii for going down on people so SWALLOWING: no real opinions on it tbh EDGING: ngl bucky was……. an Innocent Bean to a degree back in the day like. lots of repression so he never truly explored a lot– skip forward in time?? he doesn’t like this being done to him a lot at first like. totally makes him freak out. anything related to being controlled and denied is a struggle for bucky at first. but given the right person and time to build trust– maybe even experimenting with doing it on the other person first, and it really opens him up a lot. to the point where it doesn’t perhaps become something he outright craves doing/having done to him all the time, but definitely something that will click in certain instances as a kinda of ‘welp shit yep this is what is needed to help rn’ in the sense of either having it done to himself or doing it to someone else. TEASING: jfc bucky barnes is a doof and has no idea but he is actually the biggest tease without even trying!! when he is trying however, it’s ridiculous and will cause eyes to roll. he loves being teased though but 10/10 will never admit.

DOMINANT OR SUBMISSIVE?: massive fucken switch tbh but like– hes never in the middle. he either 100% feels one or the other, it just tends to change sometimes/depending on his mood/headspace/partner etc. TOP OR BOTTOM?: as with above tbh, a hella switch

DADDY KINK?: ohh boii he has a massive one. and being such a switch it works either way— being the daddy or little/whatever term preferred. that being said— he has a thing for name usage as a whole— sir, master/mistress/ma’am/all that stuff-- sergeant especially eyyy. but the further depths of daddy kinks work really well for him given, as with most, the level of trust and intimacy. PRAISE KINK?: ....oh boy. does bucky barnes have the biggest fucking praise kink or whaaattt DOMESTIC SERVITUDE: it’s not really something hes into tbh like, doesn’t need it/like it from his partners. but certainly, to tie in with the romantic stuff it can come into play with those he loves like it will just be a case of he does certain things. but it’s not a fully developed kink or anything-- not to the extent of essentially becoming a domestic slave for a person etc. he aint about that. PETPLAY: it’s another thing bucky comes to learning about in later life and at first, doesn’t understand– but as he comes to get curious, he learns about it more and it’s certainly something he enjoys exploring. hes particularly fond of his partner in position of ‘pet’ and he will always be a doting and adoring ‘owner’– never cruel, always nurturing. however, when it is switched around/if he is the pet-- then he likes his partner to take the opposite care with him. he wants a harsh owner within those scenes. DISCIPLINE: it’s a tricky one with bucky bc like he worries people get the wrong idea with him, that he enjoys it for the wrong reason. hes not a sadist, nor is he a masochist as such. it’s not about enjoying the pain, but enjoying the control it provides. the grounding. to discipline someone else and be allowed that trust and control with someone and to also receive it himself. but it is only ever with someone he has spent time with, spent time building a relationship and trust with. he can never have casual relationships that involve any of this, not on any deeper levels other than simple basics. but yeah he just !! he really likes the control it can provide either to do this or have this done with him. having clear rules and consequences if those are broken?? thats some good shit !! BEGGING: the idea of it nopes him out tbh. he hates the idea of it, but as he’s come to find-- he actually rather enjoys it in practice?? being driven to that level, and also driving someone else to it too and holding their release in whatever kind of way, in his hand?? perfect!! so it’s something that has grown over time tbh from a nope to a yes?? FORCED ORGASM: with stuff like this it’s always a case of the having a strong bond and trust thing. but as well like asdfghj he himself, when he is in a submissive head space, gets truly lost in it. he needs to offer up all control of himself in order to achieve some peace. due to his past it’s a difficult place for him to be in, but the fact is he craves it so deeply it hurts sometimes, so he needs a partner that will be right there with him and not hesitate to take from him. so this is hella encouraged!! in the same respect, if it’s something his partner is okay with too– he enjoys doing it to them too, having so much of their trust and control. ORGASM DENIAL: aandd this one ties in with that bc it’s the flipside.

GAG: 100% nope in any instance. although with someone he trusts, if he is really really deep in sub space like, he’ll ask for it. but it’s rare. very fucking rare. COLLAR: something he hates the idea of at first and thinks is a bit odd and-- honestly, again, he worries other people might judge him for wanting it?? but ends up being a thing he likes to wear- bc no matter his head space, dominant or submissive, he likes the visual representation of belonging. it’s grounding. especially bc it’s such a positive possession. he loves his partner to have one too but would never force it. but like with most things with bucky-- it’s only ever something that happens with someone hes committed to either in a romantic sense, or d/s dynamic etc. LEASH: not so much like?? nahh BONDAGE (LIGHT): he’s cool with light amounts?? cuffs, that kinda of thing?? BONDAGE (HEAVY): this one takes time though bc it can be a trigger for him if done wrong-- communication is so key in kink relationships, and he can be bad at it sometimes so?? but if it’s with someone hes insanely close to it’s a lot easier bc he can comfortably to an extent discuss his triggers and such. however as a side note: he fucking adores shibari.

DILDOS: he ends up with quite the collection to use either on himself or someone else PLUGS: as above-- he reeeally enjoys these VIBRATORS: aaasss aboooveee SOUNDING: he freaks the fuck out at even the idea ahahaha it’s kinda hilarious really his reaction at even the mention COCK RING: he’ll sulk over the idea of someone using one on him bc?? how dare u delay my orgasm/take that control but he actually likes the aesthetic of it and the amount of trust it implies.

ORGY: hard nope, will only ever watch but never engage. THREESOME: only ever with two other people hes in a relationship with/is close with etc VOYUERISM: he hella has a kink tbh but he will blush and ignore it and never admit EXHIBITIONISM: only his partner is allowed to watch him so nope, nobody else allowed. the closest he gets is like– semi public sexual acts kinda thing-- bathrooms?? dressing rooms?? balconies?? under a table?? that kinda thing. where the is a risk of being caught and seen, but it doesn’t even really happen.

PAIN

LIGHT: as mentioned before in the discipline section, it’s not so much that he craves the pain/inflicting it, as it’s about the control and trust that comes with it. while he does enjoy receiving pain and it certainly is true that certain types turn him on, it’s less about the sexual connotations for him as it is the emotional motivations and such. HEAVY: so as above NIPPLE CLAMPS: y e s !! ohmygod he l o v e s these being used on himself-- and on the flip side, adores the reactions when used on others. WAX: not so much, but willing to explore like?? the aesthetic and visuals of it interest him, but it’s nothing more than aesthetically pleasing really. BITING: b i t e hiiimm!! and he hella likes biting and leaving marks on people CANING: something that starts out as a soft limit, but actually ends up becoming a thing he really, really enjoys and craves. however, doesn’t enjoy using it on other people. SPANKING: yiisss receiving and giving!! especially given that it’s tied in with the whole discipline thing !! SCRATCHING: he likes being left with scratch marks a looott HAIR PULLING: indeeedd!! god he’s so weak for this. and has a real habit of doing this a l o t with other people !!

#posted this so long ago on my private blog with levi but !! made some tweaks here and there and just !!#PUTTING BUCKY ON BLAST ;D;D #✦ headcanon // james buchanan barnes. ✦

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lordnegan · 5 years

Text

A very, very long muse info meme thing

Tagged by: No one!

Tagging: @twiicetheheart @boltxnbastard @ancientandforevcr @safetydoesntexist @YOU! Do this and say I tagged you!

( all of these answers are based off of my twd verse )

BODY AND APPEARANCE

1. DESCRIBE THE CHARACTER’S HEIGHT AND BUILD. IS HE HEAVYSET, THIN, SHORT, RANGY? —-Negan is 6′1″ / has a pretty average build and is thin/slender. 2. HOW OLD IS HE? —-48. 3. DESCRIBE HIS POSTURE. DOES HE CARRY HIMSELF WELL OR DOES HE SLOUCH? —-Carries himself strongly and with squared shoulders. 4. HOW IS HIS HEALTH? IS HE FIT OR OUT OF SHAPE? ANY ILLNESSES OR CONDITIONS? ANY PHYSICAL DISABILITIES? —-Other than issues with not being fertile, Negan is in top physical health with no physical disabilities. He is quite physically fit as well. 5. HOW DOES HE MOVE? IS HE CLUMSY, GRACEFUL, TENSE, FLUID? —-Moves with an air of confidence and certainty, a cocky swagger with a walk that tells everyone around him that he owns every bit of ground he walks on. Very “alpha male”. 6. HOW ATTRACTIVE IS THIS CHARACTER PHYSICALLY? HOW DOES HE PERCEIVE HIMSELF IN THE MIRROR? —-VERY physically attractive and he knows this fact well.

7. DESCRIBE HIS COMPLEXION. DARK, LIGHT, CLEAR, SCARRED? —-Light and fair complexion. 8. DESCRIBE HIS HAIR: COLOR, TEXTURE, STYLE. —-Black with flecks of greying at the scalp; his beard is more salt than pepper at this point. 9. WHAT COLOR ARE HIS EYES? —-A dark and intense hazel. 10. DOES THE CHARACTER HAVE ANY OTHER NOTEWORTHY FEATURES? —-Negan has a scar on the right side of his face, between his temple and his cheek. Also has a few tattoos on his arms. 11. WHAT ARE HIS CHIEF TENSION CENTERS? —-In his hands and shoulders. 12. WHAT IS THE CHARACTER’S WARDROBE LIKE? CASUAL, DRESSY, UTILITARIAN? BRIGHT COLORS, PASTELS, NEUTRALS? IS IT VARIED, OR DOES HE HAVE SIX OF THE SAME SUIT? —-Leather boots; always some form of darker jeans with a plain t-shirt; t-shirt is usually a lighter color but he does wear greys and even blacks from time to time. Over top of it, his well known and weathered leather jacket. Rarely, if ever, deviates from this style. 13. DO HIS CLOTHES FIT WELL? DOES HE SEEM COMFORTABLE IN THEM? —-His clothes fit well enough, though not entirely form fitting; a little loose without losing his shape in them. 14. DOES HE DRESS THE SAME ON THE JOB AS HE DOES IN HIS FREE TIME? IF NOT, WHAT ARE THE DIFFERENCES? —-Incredibly rare to ever see him without his leather jacket, but can be known to go without his jacket for short bits of time. 15. YOU KNEW IT WAS COMING: BOXERS, BRIEFS OR COMMANDO? —-Boxer shorts.

SPEECH

1. WHAT DOES THIS CHARACTER’S VOICE SOUND LIKE? HIGH-PITCHED, DEEP, HOARSE? —-Deep and bassy and hoarse. 2. HOW DOES HE NORMALLY SPEAK? LOUD, SOFT, FAST, EVENLY? DOES HE TALK EASILY, OR DOES HE HESITATE? —-Depends upon who he’s addressing, but usually he takes his time speaking and speaks through a hoarse and quiet tone. Words come to Negan very easily and he never hesitates or stutters on anything he says. 3. DOES THE CHARACTER HAVE A DISTINCT ACCENT OR DIALECT? ANY INDIVIDUAL QUIRKS OF PRONUNCIATION? ANY, LIKE, YOU KNOW, VERBAL TICS? —-Negan’s accent is vaguely southern and he doesn’t tend to have any kind of verbal tiks or quirks (other than cursing a lot). 4. WHAT LANGUAGE/S DOES HE SPEAK, AND WITH HOW MUCH FLUENCY? —-Really only knows English but has probably picked up a little on Spanish from school, but nothing substantial in the least. 5. DOES HE SWITCH LANGUAGES OR DIALECTS IN CERTAIN SITUATIONS? —-Nope, sticks to what he knows. 6. IS HE A GOOD IMPROMPTU SPEAKER, OR DOES HE HAVE TO THINK ABOUT HIS WORDS? —-VERY good at being well spoken on the spot and seems to always know exactly the thing to say in any situation right away. 7. IS HE ELOQUENT OR INARTICULATE? UNDER WHAT CIRCUMSTANCES MIGHT THIS CHANGE? —-He’s eloquent in his own vile sort of cursing way. Even in dangerous, life threatening situations, he retains his eloquent and well spoken nature.

MENTAL AND EMOTIONAL

1. HOW INTELLIGENT IS THIS CHARACTER? IS HE BOOK-SMART OR STREET-SMART? —-Negan is blessed to have both book and street smarts. Both are exactly what brought him to being a strong leader and keeps him on top. 2. DOES HE THINK ON HIS FEET, OR DOES HE NEED TIME TO DELIBERATE? —-Is very capable of doing both, but he tends to succeed more when he has time to deliberate and form a plan that he can enact in a coordinated way. 3. DESCRIBE THE CHARACTER’S THOUGHT PROCESS. IS HE MORE LOGICAL, OR MORE INTUITIVE? IDEALISTIC OR PRACTICAL? —-Negan meets all these criteria as it largely depends upon the situation. He’s a very adaptable thinker, taking in all the angles he sees for consideration and going from there. However, he tends to go for a more practical approach with a mix of logic and intuition (though it is HIS logic and intuition he relies on, which can be seen as backwards and cruel). 4. WHAT KIND OF EDUCATION HAS THE CHARACTER HAD? —-A bachelors degree in physical education. 5. WHAT ARE HIS AREAS OF EXPERTISE? WHAT, IF ANYTHING, IS HE INTERESTED IN LEARNING MORE ABOUT? —-Due to his extensive schooling in physical education, he knows how to train bodies to be physically fit, knows the endurance of the human body, and everything in between. He also thinks certain scientific things are pretty interesting, though doesn’t have the time nor enough interest to pursue learning more about these things. 6. IS HE AN INTROVERT OR AN EXTROVERT? —-Very, VERY big extrovert. 7. DESCRIBE THE CHARACTER’S TEMPERAMENT. IS HE EVEN-TEMPERED OR DOES HE HAVE MOOD SWINGS? CHEERFUL OR MELANCHOLY? LAID-BACK OR DRIVEN? —-Generally, Negan tends to be even-tempered, having a level head that keeps him calm. However, he can be prone to certain outbursts of anger when he’s pushed too far and can act out verbally and physically. Even through these bursts of anger, he’s able to pull himself back and reassert his collected demeanor. Most times his anger is quiet and holds a sense of forebode. 8. HOW DOES HE RESPOND TO NEW PEOPLE OR SITUATIONS? IS HE SUSPICIOUS, RELAXED, TIMID, ENTHUSIASTIC? —-When it comes to new people and new things, he’s pretty eager to jump at the chance to learn about the place/people/thing. He also appears wholly comfortable in any new situation. 9. IS HE MORE LIKELY TO ACT, OR TO REACT? —-Definitely act but that won’t stop him from reacting (and quite boldly at that). 10. WHICH IS HIS DEFAULT: FIGHT OR FLIGHT? —-Fight but if there is an option to run away from a situation that looks grim, he will absolutely do so to save his own hide. 11. DESCRIBE THE CHARACTER’S SENSE OF HUMOR. DOES HE APPRECIATE JOKES? PUNS? GALLOWS HUMOR? BATHROOM HUMOR? PRANKS? —-Negan loves, loves, LOVES making terrible jokes, usually at the expense of others. In fact, he finds they’re better if they are at the expense of others, if only to get them to lighten up or to even unnerve them with his sense of humor. Which his humor tends to be grim and poking at harsh truths around him. 12. DOES THE CHARACTER HAVE ANY DIAGNOSABLE MENTAL DISORDERS? IF YES, HOW DOES HE DEAL WITH THEM? —-Negan has a lot of behaviors of having an antisocial personality disorder and comes close to checking off a lot of symptoms of being psychopathic, but not completely for both. Clearly has some repressed emotions and unaddressed grief regarding his late wife Lucille, whom he couldn’t put down and holds a lot of guilt over. From that, he probably still has some lingering PTSD and is projecting some of that onto his bat, Lucille, by having the weapon somehow fill that void of his wife. 13. WHAT MOMENTS IN THIS CHARACTER’S LIFE HAVE DEFINED HIM AS A PERSON? —-Losing his parents, being diagnosed as infertile, losing his wife Lucille to cancer, and rising through the ranks to become the leader of the Saviors. 14. WHAT DOES HE FEAR? —-Loneliness. Being completely and utterly alone with no one. 15. WHAT ARE HIS HOPES OR ASPIRATIONS? —-To lead his people into a prosperous future where he’ll continue to lead them, protecting and providing for his people, and aspiring to rebuild civilization with his own set of rules and ideals. 16. WHAT IS SOMETHING HE DOESN’T WANT ANYONE TO FIND OUT ABOUT HIM? —-That he does fear being entirely alone and that he worries about losing control. Also that, without his bat Lucille, he feels incomplete.

RELATIONSHIPS

1. DESCRIBE THIS CHARACTER’S RELATIONSHIP WITH HIS PARENTS. —-His relationship with his mother was a good and loving one, whereas his father was slightly abusive and neglectful. Both are deceased, however. 2. DOES THE CHARACTER HAVE ANY SIBLINGS? WHAT IS/WAS THEIR RELATIONSHIP LIKE? —-No siblings, he was an only child. 3. ARE THERE OTHER BLOOD RELATIVES TO WHOM HE IS CLOSE? ARE THERE ONES HE CAN’T STAND? —-None that he was close to as he grew up with a slightly estranged uncle after his parents died. 4. ARE THERE OTHER, UNRELATED PEOPLE WHOM HE CONSIDERS PART OF HIS FAMILY? WHAT ARE HIS RELATIONSHIPS WITH THEM? —-None at this point. 5. WHO IS/WAS THE CHARACTER’S BEST FRIEND? HOW DID THEY MEET? —-His best friend was Lucille, growing incredibly close to her even before they married. However, nowadays, he doesn’t consider anyone a true best friend. Those around him he trusts he simply sees as those working for him, though he would tease them about being his best friend in jest. 7. DOES HE MAKE FRIENDS EASILY, OR DOES HE HAVE TROUBLE GETTING ALONG WITH PEOPLE? —-He can be a very agreeable man with people, really preferring things to be fair, though his habit of making sure others know he’s on top can bring tension into the equation. 8. WHICH DOES HE CONSIDER MORE IMPORTANT: FAMILY OR FRIENDS? —-Neither, really, as he doesn’t exactly see himself as truly having either. 9. IS THE CHARACTER SINGLE, MARRIED, DIVORCED, WIDOWED? HAS HE BEEN MARRIED MORE THAN ONCE? —-Legitimately widowed and only truly married once. Currently has about 7 “wives”. 10. IS HE CURRENTLY IN A ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIP WITH SOMEONE OTHER THAN A SPOUSE? —-The relationship with his “wives” tends to be more physical than romantic and he hasn’t been romantic with anyone since he lost his wife, Lucille. 11. WHO WAS HIS FIRST CRUSH? WHO IS HIS LATEST? —-His first crush was on a classmate when he was in elementary school. His latest is @twiicetheheart (though it’s more of an infatuation than a crush). 12. WHAT DOES HE LOOK FOR IN A ROMANTIC PARTNER? —-It would take a lot of trust and understanding and moving past all the layers he’s emotionally built up around himself to get to the point he’d be looking for any kind of romantic partner. He has a lot of baggage and uncertainty when it comes to opening himself up like that. 13. DOES THE CHARACTER HAVE CHILDREN? GRANDCHILDREN? IF YES, HOW DOES HE RELATE TO THEM? IF NO, DOES HE WANT ANY? —-He’s wanted children for as long as he can remember but the news of his infertility began to drive him away from Lucille and drove a rift between their marriage. Because of his infertility, he has no children though he wishes he had them. 14. DOES HE HAVE ANY RIVALS OR ENEMIES? —-Oh yes. Yes he does. 15. WHAT IS THE CHARACTER’S SEXUAL ORIENTATION? WHERE DOES HE FALL ON THE KINSEY SCALE? —-Negan considers himself bisexual with a heavy preference for women. On the Kinsey Scale, he falls under “heterosexual, more than incidental homosexual tendencies. 16. HOW DOES HE FEEL ABOUT SEX? HOW IMPORTANT IS IT TO HIM? —-He really, really enjoys sex and finds it a good release for his tensions but is only into it if his partner wants it as well. 17. WHAT ARE HIS TURN-ONS? TURN-OFFS? WEIRD BEDROOM HABITS? —-He loves being in control in the bedroom, though he can find when a partner is a little more controlling/feisty, that gets him going as well. Hates the feeling of condoms so very rarely, if ever, uses them.

BELIEFS

1. DO YOU KNOW YOUR CHARACTER’S ASTROLOGICAL (ZODIAC OF CHOICE) SIGN? HOW WELL DOES HE FIT TYPE? —-Negan is an Aries and fits the type very well. 2. IS THIS CHARACTER RELIGIOUS, SPIRITUAL, BOTH, OR NEITHER? HOW IMPORTANT ARE THESE ELEMENTS IN HIS LIFE? —-He was vaguely raised Christian, but finds that he’s more an atheist. He believes more in the material world than anything else. 3. DOES THIS CHARACTER HAVE A PERSONAL CODE OF MORALS OR ETHICS? IF SO, HOW DID THAT BEGIN? WHAT WOULD IT TAKE TO COMPROMISE IT? —-Negan believes that the strong should lead and always look after and protect those weaker than them, though some of his behaviors are contradictory to this ideal he holds. He is also vehemently against rape, believing it to be a very savage act and warranting immediate death. He’s always held these beliefs, even before the world began to fall, but those beliefs came out much stronger than before once societal rules were no longer in place. 4. HOW DOES HE REGARD BELIEFS THAT DIFFER FROM HIS? IS HE TOLERANT, INTOLERANT, CURIOUS, INDIFFERENT? —-There’s a strange sort of curiosity in those that have different beliefs than him, almost like he tries to understand why they believe the way they do, but when it comes down to his hard and clear cut rules, he is wholly intolerant of them. For example, if someone follows a specific religion, he’s surprisingly tolerant and genuinely curious. But if someone believes blatant and senseless murder is fine, he is entirely and vehemently intolerant. 5. WHAT PREJUDICES DOES HE HOLD? ARE THEY IRRATIONAL OR DOES HE HAVE A GOOD REASON FOR THEM? —-Only prejudices he holds are those against people who have wrong him in ways he perceives to be wrong.

DAILY LIFE

1. WHAT IS THE CHARACTER’S FINANCIAL SITUATION? IS HE RICH, POOR, COMFORTABLE, IN DEBT? —-Being the leader of the Saviors, he has barely any need or want for anything as he can get whatever he’d like in a moment’s notice.

2. WHAT IS HIS SOCIAL STATUS? HAS THIS CHANGED OVER TIME, AND IF SO, HOW HAS THE CHANGE AFFECTED HIM? —-Again, he is at the top of the social ladder, his whims and desires being what guides him.

3. WHERE DOES HE LIVE? HOUSE, APARTMENT, TRAILER? IS HIS HOME HIS CASTLE OR JUST A PLACE TO CRASH? WHAT CONDITION IS IT IN? DOES HE SHARE IT WITH OTHERS? —-Lives in a cozy, nicely furnished, and comfortable room within an old, abandoned warehouse called the Sanctuary.

4. BESIDES THE BASIC NECESSITIES, WHAT DOES HE SPEND HIS MONEY ON? —-Negan has no need for money but has an abundance of supplies that he uses for himself, first and foremost, but also allows a lot of it to go to his people.

5. WHAT DOES HE DO FOR A LIVING? IS HE GOOD AT IT? DOES HE ENJOY IT, OR WOULD HE RATHER BE DOING SOMETHING ELSE? —-He loves leading his people and being in charge, being able to tell people what is or isn’t okay or allowed and wouldn’t have it any other way.

6. WHAT ARE HIS INTERESTS OR HOBBIES? HOW DOES HE SPEND HIS FREE TIME? —-Negan actually really enjoys reading to pass his downtime or spending some time with his wives.

7. WHAT ARE HIS EATING HABITS? DOES HE SKIP MEALS, EAT OUT, DRINK ALCOHOL, AVOID CERTAIN FOODS? —-He eats at least a couple meals a day, only the best foods out of which has been grown/found. He likes casually drinking alcohol, though tends to avoid growing drunk off of the substance as it reminds him of his father too much.

ASSOCIATIONS

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING DO YOU ASSOCIATE WITH THE CHARACTER, OR WHICH IS HIS FAVORITE:

1. COLOR? —-Red. 2. SMELL? —-Leather/cologne musk 3. TIME OF DAY? —-Night. 4. SEASON? —-Fall. 5. BOOK? —-Lord of the Flies. 6. MUSIC? —-80′s rock/alternative. 7. PLACE? —-The Sanctuary. 8. SUBSTANCE? —-Whiskey. 9. ANIMAL? —-Panther.

(x)

#♚ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴏғ ғᴜᴄᴋɪɴɢ ғᴜᴄᴋs [ ooc. ]#♚ ᴛʜᴀᴛ's ᴊᴜsᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴀʏ ɪ ʀᴏʟʟ [ headcanon. ]#♚ ʏᴏᴜ ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ sᴄᴀʀᴇ ᴇᴀsʏ. ɪ ʟᴏᴠᴇ ᴛʜᴀᴛ! [ about. ]#( this certainly took...... )#( a while )#( hope this is what you were looking for anon lol )#( also feel free to just )#( ask for headcanons )#( because hell i love doing specific headcanons )

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starlingsrps · 5 years

Text

lily ford char. dev. (long)

BASIC INFORMATION

FULL NAME: lily jean ford

REASONING: nah

NICKNAME(S): lil is about it

PREFERRED NAME(S): lily

BIRTH DATE: september 18

AGE: twenty three

ZODIAC: virgo

GENDER: cis female

PRONOUNS: she/her

ROMANTIC ORIENTATION: heterosexual

SEXUAL ORIENTATION: heterosexual

NATIONALITY: american

ETHNICITY: american (european mutt)

CURRENT LOCATION: los angeles, ca

LIVING CONDITIONS: small apartment with brady - she's not quite ready to upgrade just yet and they're fine where they're at damnit.

BACKGROUND

BIRTH PLACE: kearney, ne

HOMETOWN: kearney, ne

SOCIAL CLASS: lower-upper

EDUCATION LEVEL: high school diploma, acting classes

FATHER: christopher ford, 46, middle school principal

MOTHER: kathy ford, 46, nurse

SIBLING(S): topher, 20; reese, 17

BIRTH ORDER: oldest

CHILDREN: ------

PET(S): nah but she loves all dogs

OTHER IMPORTANT RELATIVES: brady's family

PREVIOUS RELATIONSHIPS: nope.

CURRENT RELATIONSHIP: going on ten years with brady

ARRESTS?: oh no

OCCUPATION & INCOME

PRIMARY SOURCE OF INCOME: actress - current project is the darkened room

CONTENT WITH THEIR JOB (OR LACK THERE OF)?: it's the dream. she moved to LA to be an actress and after five years of extra work and playing dead bodies, she finally has a starring role and it's EVERYTHING.

PAST JOB(S): waitress

SPENDING HABITS: pretty responsible. she gets a lot of free stuff which blows her mind.

MOST VALUABLE POSSESSION: she bought a pair of prada sunglasses that she never wears and keeps in the box still because they were too expensive.

SKILLS & ABILITIES

PHYSICAL STRENGTH: B+

SPEED: B+

INTELLIGENCE: B

ACCURACY: B

AGILITY: B

STAMINA: A+ - lily is a champ at waiting around on set

TEAMWORK: good!

TALENTS: acting, decorating

SHORTCOMINGS: she's hella naive

LANGUAGE(S) SPOKEN: english

DRIVE?: yep

JUMP-STAR A CAR?: yep

CHANGE A FLAT TIRE?: yep

RIDE A BICYCLE?: yep

SWIM?: sure

PLAY AN INSTRUMENT?: nope

PLAY CHESS?: nope

BRAID HAIR?: yep

TIE A TIE?: yep

PICK A LOCK?: nope

PHYSICAL APPEARANCE & CHARACTERISTICS

FACE CLAIM: abigail cowen

EYE COLOR: blue

HAIR COLOR: red

HAIR TYPE/STYLE: long. it's pretty much signature.

GLASSES/CONTACTS?: glasses

DOMINANT HAND: right

HEIGHT: 5'8

BUILD: slim

EXERCISE HABITS: daily and she loathes it.

SKIN TONE: fair and freckled

TATTOOS: nah

PIERCINGS: ears

MARKS/SCARS: a few moles and a birthmark on her left arm

NOTABLE FEATURES: the Hair

USUAL EXPRESSION: cheerful.

CLOTHING STYLE: california casual

JEWELRY: sometimes yes, sometimes no

ALLERGIES: nah

DIET: healthy af

PHYSICAL AILMENTS: nah

PSYCHOLOGY

ENNEAGRAM TYPE: 2 - the helper

MORAL ALIGNMENT: lawful good

TEMPERAMENT: choleric

ELEMENT: fire

MBTI TYPE: ESFP

MENTAL CONDITIONS/DISORDERS: some anxiety but nothing too bad. pot helps.

SOCIABILITY: good! she's a lil ray of sunshine

EMOTIONAL STABILITY: pretty chill.

OBSESSION(S): nah

COMPULSION(S): nah

PHOBIA(S): failure and fire

ADDICTION(S): nah

DRUG USE: she won't say no to pot now and then but she's trying to be better about such things, considering.

ALCOHOL USE: sure.

PRONE TO VIOLENCE?: nope.

MANNERISMS

SPEECH STYLE: bright and upbeat - she sounds like a disney princess

ACCENT: nah

QUIRKS: she does not sleep. she is the worst sleeper on record.

HOBBIES: going to the beach, shopping, crafts

HABITS: pilates every morning, damn it to hell.

NERVOUS TICKS: braiding her hair

DRIVES/MOTIVATIONS: brady, happiness, success

POSITIVE TRAITS: sweet, talented, encouraging, loyal, hardworking, patient

NEGATIVE TRAITS: naive, sensitive, impulsive, shy

SENSE OF HUMOR: anything!

DO THEY CURSE OFTEN?: not really

CATCHPHRASE(S): nah.

FAVORITES

ACTIVITY: being with brady but also being on set

ANIMAL: dogs

BEVERAGE: water

BOOK: yes please

COLOR: yellow

DESIGNER: elie saab

FOOD: cinnamon rolls

FLOWER: white peonies

GEM: diamonds

HOLIDAY: christmas

MODE OF TRANSPORTATION: drive and she's really liking being driven about

MOVIE: casablanca

SONG: "juice" by lizzo

SCENERY: the ocean

SCENT: the beach and flowers

SPORT: football

SPORTS TEAM: the huskers

TELEVISION SHOW: house hunters

WEATHER: sunny socal weather

VACATION DESTINATION: home

ATTITUDES

GREATEST DREAM: she's living it

GREATEST FEAR: losing everything

MOST AT EASE WHEN: with brady

LEAST AT EASE WHEN: frickin paparazzi

WORST POSSIBLE THING THAT COULD HAPPEN: going back to nebraska alone and having failed.

BIGGEST ACHIEVEMENT: being cast on the darkened room

BIGGEST REGRET: she tries not to.

BIGGEST SECRET: nah.

TOP PRIORITIES: brady, her career, learning how to floss.

#c: lily ford

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callmetippytumbles · 6 years

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Thoughts on THOTs, TRR Book 3, Chapter 3: Sometimes Petty Ain’t Enuff

This week’s THOTs were king of a drag to get through. I can’t put my finger on why. Maybe I want to focus more energy on my fanfics. Maybe I was not given enough opportunities for petty as I required when being asked to deal with A Demon. Maybe I was feeling pretty meh about this chapter as a whole. Lord knows. I have been like:

Issa mood and a lifestyle. When it comes to this chapter.

You guys deserve better than this. I thought I was better than this. I am not. Bullshit and lies.

So the chapter opens in the boutique with Maxwell and Bertrand. Look at how far we have fallen. Last week I was being greeted by my love, and this week I have to be stank with Bertie and Ernie Maxwell. Halle, per the usual, stays asking the real ass questions:

When DO I get to see my duchy and why aren’t we going over therre?

I don’t want this. I would like a Plan B. Halle continues to press the pertinent questions.

It’s like she does not want to have to grovel in front of this raggedy heifer who stepped to her crazy at her own party. For the why Bertrand? Why are you trying to make it seem as if I can’t get ANYONE else?

That doesn’t cover the Demon piece, Bertrand. We could get someone else. Like Kiara. Kiara would be dope. She is excellent in court, has connections to the press, is driven, can speak multiple languages. Plus Kiara is so skilled A Demon made Kiara her second in command. Why not her? Oh PB made sure she got knifed up during the Homecoming Ball so that I have to let Bertrand continue with this bullshit.

Well, I can give you guys that. Remember how that Demon spun intentional psychological fuckery and downgraded that to hazing with no comeuppance?

Again, Halle keeps asking the real questions:

Yeah, the bitch likes green and black, but that does not answer the question I put before you. Why would IT help us? Maxwell and Bertrand don’t want to think about that question. They want to dress you up to appeal to Slytherin them peoples in Fydelia and Champagne Mami.

Da alphet o da wheek!

So not only is Halle going to have to grovel to a motherfucking Demon to offer it a job IT does not motherfucking need like it’s the only motherfucking person who can help us. Halle has to do all of that in Cordonian Fashion Nova thotwear.

Do we really have to do this? If not A Demon we can get someone else. Liam has like a whole fugging team of press people. Why can’t I get one of them? Or a recommendation from one of them to get someone like one of them. I would rather have Chance the Rapper Berry be my press secretary.

Also, I do not think that Fashion Nova thotwear is going to get a Demon to be like “Yeah, let me get a job working for the THOT that stole my man and crown.” Halle agrees.

She is smiling though because while the dress isn’t winning A Demon over, she still likes thotwear and that will win Liam over. I will take the teensiest morsel that I can get.

Before I can show off my teeny tiny dress to My King, Bertrand, continues to heap on the shit. I have other goals besides intentionally failing to convince a Demon that IT needs a job so that we can get a Plan B. We have to persuade Champ Mami to come to our wedding and bring her mans as well. Halle:

PB:

Halle is also confused as to why we are seeing this man for the first time today. She also is like “hus-WHOM?”

Adelaide acts like she doesn’t have a husband because she doesn’t. She has an arrangement with a sponsor. Sponsors are not there to give things like love, emotional support, vitamin D. Those things are outsourced since Champ Mami will not go without. Especially her vitamin D. She needs it to live and thrive. It makes sense to me that she doesn’t like this dude. Halle still has to care if this stingy dude sits in the pews while she marries her king.

Bertrand also makes a point to say that Champagne Mami and her sponsor are on the outs. Me:

Bertrand suggests talking to them separately and learning information to benefit this whack ass cause. Halle is like:

Bertrand:

Me:

So not only do I have to beg this Demon to take a job IT does not need, do it while wearing Slytherin’s Fashion Nova collab, I also have to be Iyanla to these rich people?

After the boutique, we finally are on our way to the depths of Hades Champagne’s Mami’s house.

Just before we brace ourselves for the bullshit, Halle has the first of her few interactions with Liam. Liam:

Me:

I mean I would have a lot on my mind. I have to brown nose to a beast… Halle though is better than me because instead of like taking a moment to get steeped in feelings and butthurt is trying to get information on Godfrey. Really, PB? They can’t even be nice and give me this Godfrey:

Much rather be talking to him than some bitter-ass Brit who doesn’t give a fuck about his wife, or her home. FML. Anyway, Liam does not have much to offer on The Sponsor other than he married Champagne Mami for political reasons and likes titles and shits on fun. Basically the opposite of the Champagne Champion who loves fun and mess. I can understand why the dick and the other components of a life partner are outsourced.

While Halle is attempting to get in the spirit, she isn’t entirely above a dig.

The dig does not make this any easier though. Liam:

Because you will be by my side right? Liam:

BULLSHIT BALL TIME!

It is not even a second into this, and Regina is dragging Champagne Mami.

Champagne Mami isn’t a punk and can serve some back.

Not too much because she knows her cousin is the queen, but enough. Damn Schumrda Qween is a savage. If I didn’t like Champagne Mami so much, I would salute her. I am already torn.

When I was talking to @lizzybeth1986, she pointed out Champ Mami is doing Regina a favor by hosting this party. That is a substantial point. Right now, the nobility is not fucking with the royal family because they do not want to get the Drake/Bastien/Justin/Kiara treatment. Adelaide not only agrees to host the King, her petty ass cousin Regina, who still take shots at her despite already being queen and basically winning, the royal staff, the man who rejected your child because he was done and the woman who he rejected your child for AND her friends. That is a lot to ask Gina. Then after Adelaide does all of this shit, no one shows up and Regina is still making an effort to ROAST her. I feel for Adelaide. I really do.

Next to Champ Mami is this stiff AF dude. That is her sponsor husband, Godfrey most definitely not Gao. I can feel the stick up his ass from here.

Maxwell is like magic friendship dust will fix this. I am like:

Halle is desperate, so she buys in I guess. I mean, this is a high ass first hurdle. Halle will take whatever. She then goes to A Demon to get laughed at so that she can fail and Bertrand will have to let a Plan B happen. Demon:

Well, at least Halle is a duchess, Countess of Hades Fydelia. Halle is kind enough not to point this out. I feel otherwise:

There was a petty option, I took a petty option. I have no desire to be a better person. Not like it will matter anyway. A Demon does not even take the bait. Why not just twist the knife deeper PB? A Demon is over this shit too:

Halle needs to quickly fail this fuckass mission, so she asks A Demon if it wants a job. As predicted A Demon is like:

Me:

Halle, just to say that she really tried:

Demon:

Me:

OHWELLITRIED!

Halle:

Also Halle:

After Halle’s deliberate failure, she looks to her friends and fiance for comfort and support. It’s a difficult time for her. Her fiance is MIA. Well, Liam just wants to sleep alone. Hana does point out that Liam is trying to talk to the other nobles who did risk their lives to be seen rockin’ with the royal family tonight. Halle:

I kind of picture this event for Halle being pretty eye-opening regarding getting a taste of what actually working with Liam is like. There may be times where she would prefer him to be by her side, and she would look, and he isn’t there. This wouldn’t bother Liam so much because he is used to this. He grew up in this life, so this isn’t an issue for him. Halle didn’t. Also, she is beyond new to her. Liam could have been a little more invested in being present for Halle during a difficult task. I know Halle technically asked to do this solo, but he should have known better than to take her at her word for something like this. Maybe checked in. Now Halle has to kick you out of bed and make herself horny and mad. Great job husbando! Additionally, it would have been nice to see what Liam was doing behind the scenes while Halle had to eat crow.

Anyway, at least Halle’s friends are on her side. Maxwell and Hana:

Me:

Halle:

Drake is unimpressed by A Demon’s party. Why he should be? It’s a buffet. I expected better from your peeples Satan. He is unimpressed by most parties that have fancy food and booze that isn’t whiskey. At least his simple tastes ensure his loyalty to Halle.

Nope. Spoke too soon. Drake is all about that pasta because its man food and hesa man and rah! Halle still eats the food because she obviously did not read the Count of Monte Cristo. If Halle did, she would know that skipping the food would be an insult to communicate that she does not fuck with that demon over there. Take a page from Schmurda Qween or even Olivia. Halle though is not above free food so she too sells herself out.

Because this party is not shitty enough, who else but Neville to take things from worse to worser. At least it is just Neville. Drake runs into him with a plate of pasta. Neville ignores Drake at first and focuses on Halle. Neville presents it as congratulations, it becomes super obvious that it actually a vehicle for a barrage of backhanded compliments. Halle is like:

Drake on the other hand:

Drake will jump in front of a bullet for you, cuss someone out if they call you out your name, but his ride or die stops at pasta. I can take that. Neville did not like that Drake, a commoner, had the nerve to buck to him crazy. He is big mad. So he starts talking down to Drake. The whole tirade is trash, but then Neville goes too far:

Me:

Drake is about to go full “Knuck if You Buck” on this dude, but Halle pulls him back. Like any other dude with too much privilege and not enough punches to the face, he still continues to try it.

I am like:

This party is shit anyway. Let it come to violence! This fuckboy deserves. Hana intervenes and knows how to end things quickly and nonviolently. Apparently, Neville not only is absolutely ain’t shit, but he is also a freeloader:

So you don’t want to support me, Our King, but you are just coming on this tour to find a bedwarmer? If you don’t… Hana who is too good for this world suggests trying to invite this bastard to freeload at my wedding as well as the Unity/Begging Tour.

Drake has had enough and excuses himself. Halle being done and it’s been a while since PB has held their hand out for diamonds follows him. Of course, there is a diamond scene with Drake, for 20 diamonds, you can teach him how to dance. Drake wants to learn because since he cannot go full Hulk on Neville and send him to his maker, he figures getting 3 10’s on Dancing With the Stars is a good way to get back at Neville. If you are petty like me, the Drake roasting begins now. If you are not petty, the roasting is later. Halle is petty, and she has some moments.

Drake:

Halle:

Now that Halle is done, she teaches Drake some moves. If you are romancing Drake, this scene is much more romantic. For those of us that aren’t its symbolizes that our messy, hoeing days are done. Pour one out for our messy heaux pasts and 30 diamond scenes I will never forget. That thigh grab move is EVERYTHING.

Drake wants to try dancing because he wants to step up for Liam (he wants to step up for you if he is romancing you) and be seen as more than Liam’s Professional Best Friend. Halle teaches Drake the Cordonian Waltz. I am like “Drake is not ready for that, start easy with the Lean Back and work your way up.” This echoes a little to when Hana taught Halle, but I found it more echoing back to when Halle dances with Drake during the Coronation Ball. During that dance, Halle does all of the work and Drake kind of just stands there and doesn’t engage with the dancing. His being willing to do that much is him trying. This time Drake makes a point to actually learn the steps and be an active participant as opposed be reluctantly present. Halle points out that his active participation is essential:

There is a moment where Drake and Halle are holding each other close. It could have been very messy and full of tension, but since I am not romancing Drake and TRR heaux season is over it isn’t.

Back at the Bullshit Ball, Bertrand is looking for us. I have made no headway with convincing A Demon that the best way to bounce back from being a two-time loser for the crown is to get a job working for the woman who is responsible for defeat #2. Bertrand is not trying to discuss Plan B. Me:

Apparently, it’s time to talk to Champagne Mami and Her Sponsor. Regina is talking to Adelaide and Liam is talking to Godfrey not Gao. Me and Halle are very whatever about it, but I guess we must try. I start off easy because a wedding is basically a party and Champagne Mami loves parties. Also, this victory could set up the momentum for another victory. This is a slam dunk, right?

Regina and Adelaide are busy going in. They were ready to be like:

Halle interrupts that tense conversation to invite Champagne Mami to the wedding. Champagne Mami:

Halle, you fucked up girl. Don’t lead with the wedding, lead with the party. Anyway, Champagne Mami can’t always prioritize drinking top-shelf liquor for free and seeking new dick. Sometimes you do have to care about things like your fucked up rich family problems. Champ feels a way that her baby isn’t even trying to let Champ comfort IT with booze, rom-coms and crass talk about men. Me:

I would love to do ALL of those things with you! Why can’t you be my mom? Also, of course, A Demon does not appreciate those things. Those are good, fun things. A Demon cannot understand good and fun things because light and darkness do not mix.

Adelaide wants to be a mother and be there for her child. She wants her child to put herself first for a change. A Demon has been doing that. How much champagne have you been drinking? She also wants her child to open up to some people.

Leave my friends out of this. I am sure A Demon could summon up some similarly demonic buddies using a pentagram or whatever.

After that Champ Mami shoves us away to enjoy this terrible party. Now we have to talk to The Sponsor. He is right now talking to my MIA fiance. Liam:

Once Liam makes his quick exit, Halle is left to speak to this stick in the mud, who doesn’t like her with no support. Halle is off to a great start by messing up his title, the one thing he cares about. The Sponsor does not let up. He starts out the way A Demon starts out in Chapter 19.

A Demon is definitely its father’s child.

At least he likes your Slytherin Fashion Nova thotwear.

Then he wants to call you out your name, but this is the one time where the petty comes in handy. When you remind him of your title:

Birdman:

With that win, Halle presses on. She invites him to the wedding, but Godfrey not Gao is like:

Halle:

Well, all three of those are excellent reasons for this man not to attend your wedding, Halle. You stole things from his child, he does not give a single fuck about Cordonia, and he is afraid of his in-name-only wife. I focus on the big one, you know, that Halle straight disrespected his child.

His beef with you immediately spills into his beef with his wife.

Me @ “daughter’s defeat”:

He leaves, and goodness can enter our lives again in the form of Hana. Before we can call it a night, Neville decides to ask an uninterested Demon to dance with him. Drake is like:

So a ballroom dance battle begins. Since this battle is being instigated by men, things escalate quickly. Neville is outchea doing dramatic dips. Drake is not going to let some bitch wearing Roger Moore’s ugly suit show him up. Nevermind the fact that like 20 taps ago we just taught him how to do more than the running man, which was still a little complicated for him. Doesn’t matter, Drake wants to end this. Halle knows what to do: a lift.

Um, Halle, this is not Dirty Dancing. Baby and Johnny fucked the lift a whole bunch of times before the end of the movie. DRAKE’S SHOULDER IS ALL FUCKED UP BECAUSE OF THAT TIME HE TOOK A BULLET FOR YOU! PB is gonna have that arm just fall off out of nowhere. Drake is unsure, but Halle is doing it. Since you know, plot, they pull it off.

This leaves Neville pissed. How dare someone who wears denim tuxedos and has no respect for plaid make him look bad! He can cry in a corner about his inadequacy later.

Luckily, Hana suggests that we can get A Demon talking about getting her drunk. Look at Hana and these excellent ideas. I would much sooner use her intellect to cook up a Plan B that does not involve asking A Demon to work, but PB is insisting on this. You can choose any of your friends to invite her to play. I tried Drake thinking IT would refuse, but IT will say yes to whomever. A Demon would rather drink with us as opposed to drinking alone.

Because PB does not have enough of our money, they make a point to demand some now. Halle:

There is a book?

Anyway, the drinking game is Cordonia’s Best, where you create superlatives and then nominate the people you are playing with to get them. The winner has to drink.

A Demon still mad stays hatin’, starts with Halle.

However, this quickly becomes a Drake roast. Hana delivers a masterful read:

Me:

Drake tries to go in on me:

I see how it is, I teach your simple-ass how to dance, and this is how you repay me. I see how it is. Halle continues to shade Drake for the rest of the night.

Maxwell agrees.

Drake:

Like?

A Demon finished her drink and Maxwell, and Drake grabs more booze. Leaving Hana and Halle alone with A Demon. Halle who is better than me attempts empathy. It does not know empathy. So IT can know compassion as long as you dampen the evil with booze.

I almost felt for IT. I can understand what it is like to Tracy Flick level of ambition and lose. However, I cannot get past that time you said you wanted to psychologically break my best friend for fun:

So:

A Demon is like:

Then:

How can you read that and still not feel bad for A Demon?

I can understand what IT is going through and at the same time would like for it to fuck itself now and for the rest. PB wants to force this redemption narrative like my feelings do not matter. Demon:

Welp! I tried.

The game end and everyone return to the main hall to see Champagne Mami go AWF! Her fucks are gone, her booze is gone, and she is done.

The Sponsor wants to keep it down, but Addy is not having it on tonight. A Demon joins in.

Halle:

Me:

What? Let those rich people hash it out. I don’t need to get involved.

Maxwell:

Me:

Maxwell pushes you, and you have to go in there like Iyanla. Halle:

Not that moment. (But you should watch it, it’s funny!)

Well PB says that I have to come in on some magical negro/manic pixie dream girl shit and get y’all to sing the “I Love You” song from Barney so you can come to my wedding even though I don’t want you to be there.

Demon:

Me:

Excuse me? I broke nothing. Sure I disrespected you, undermined you at every opportunity, embarrassed you after you asked me not to, got your mama to undermine you with me, but you signed up for that the moment you put that Liam could have me on the side as part of the deal. Also, you fucked things up all by your lonesome.

Halle:

Bitch, you would not have even gotten a chance if Connie did not come through with the bullshit at the eleventh and a half hour so that Liam could choose you when we BOTH know that he was gonna pick me from jump bitch! From jump! And you fucking knew it because if you secure in your chances Demon, you would not have been bargaining with him in the middle of the night and agreeing to a side chick in the first place!

Oh, you want to forget that little nugget of 24 Karat fact!

Champagne Mami co-signs but Godfrey is not mystified by Halle’s Iyanla. Iyanla Halle gets him together too.

Me:

I am tired of this. I hate that the MC literally had to be a family therapist to these people who can afford a family therapist that can get them together. I hate that this was done to facilitate a redemption to someone who does not need it. I hate that Liam left me to do ALL of the heavy liftings on this. If Halle had to be Iyanla, why can Liam put on his Dr. Phil pants?

Halle fixes this family. Champagne Mami will come to your wedding with her sponsor.

Well, Y’all know what happens next.

Chapter ends with the worst wake up call ever:

Random Thoughts:

Why am I being made to care about the family squabbles of these people? Is the Unity Tour a Halle does her best Iyanla tour? All of these families could just hire Iyanla directly. I know Iyanla works with Oprah, but she isn’t above money, and those families have money.

I am going to riot if this happens for ALL of the tour.

There was way too little of My King in this chapter. Like he really was like “U Gud” and left me to fend for myself. I think this chapter was written more for people who are not with Liam in mind. I don’t see how to divide and conquer is a good strategy when we are fighting for our country as well as our union. Shouldn’t we show them more union?

I hate this storyline so intensely. Like: I didn’t think I could hate a storyline as much as I hated Bertrand and his baby mama drama, but this is taking me to new levels of hatred.

Since we are going to Penelope’s next week, I have a feeling we will be dealing with PTSS. She has a history of anxiety, and she was at the Homecoming Ball where she saw her bestie get knifed. We will definitely talk about how that affected her next week.

Also, I do not ship Hana with A Demon. A Demon said that she looked like a Disney princess, now they have a lurve story? FOH! A Demon set out to emotionally traumatize Hana, FOR FUN. I can’t get past that. I know a lot of people would say that Hana is over it. My response to that is Hana is over the hazing thing. Hana did not hear A Demon say that she wanted to break her. She was being escorted to the train by Drake. Halle (MC) heard that and we as the readers know that. I don’t think Hana would want to hookup with someone knowingly or unknowingly who wanted to psychologically abuse her.

I am going to go to my fanfics where they love me and I get all the Liam I want and no Demon.

#thoughts on thots #the royal romance 3 #choices the royal romance #playchoices the royal romance #king liam the missing #king liam the sexy #the royal romance #trr #trr3 #liam x mc

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autisticawesomeness-archive-blog · 6 years

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I saw on your SpIn page that you like comparing written storytelling to other mediums. Do you mean like a book that was turned into a movie or something? Or could you give an example so I understand better? It sounds really interesting and close to one of my SpIns! (private response or not, doesn't matter to me)

THANK YOU FOR GIVING ME AN EXCUSE TO INFODUMP YOU WONDERFUL, WONDERFUL PERSON

And nope, that’s not what I meant (seriously, do NOT get me started on books that I’ve read that were turned into movies. it.... won’t end well), but it’s understandable confusion!

What I meant is that every piece of media has a type of storytelling and certain narrative elements that are unique to them. Let’s compare books and movies for example: the reason you have to change books when turning them into movies is because books and movies are fundamentally different mediums.

Books, for starters, are text-based medium. Books tell a story. While most writers know the ‘show, don’t tell’ rule, books are still ultimately told through words and not images. All images can to be described by words, but the reader will fill in the blanks with their own imagination. Books have the luxury of getting completely into the main character’s head, and can therefore make things very, very clear, by giving the character internal monologues, for example. It’s also generally understood that you’ll spend at the very least a couple of hours reading a book, most likely a couple of days, so books can go into great detail about the characters/plot/worlds, etc.

Movies, however, are a visual medium. Movies, unlike books, do not tell their story, they show it. While movies do have a point of view through which the story is told, it is usually less clear than in books; additionally, in movies, scenes can switch between characters on the drop of a hat, whereas in books, this would generally be discouraged unless you have a clear mark where the change can happen (between chapters, for example). Movies also have a shorter ‘runtime’ than books; movies can take up a maximum of three hours before the audience starts complaining that it’s too long.

(Movies also have one other major advantage over books: audio. While certain audiobooks may have simple songs or sound effects, movies have an entire soundtrack. They have sound effects, they have hand-picked songs for scenes, they have completely new songs composed, etc. etc. The soundtrack is used to define the mood of any given scene and/or the entire movie. Depending on how good the soundtrack is, it can make or break a movie. This is not relevant to the comparison, I just wanted to point it out.)

So, when adapting a book to movie, you will obviously need to deal with changes in medium. Because books have the time to be more detailed, movies will need to cut out subplots or even change the main plot in order to fit it into their own, much more limited, runtime. Movies also need to adapt the written descriptions to actual images; this can be a problem, if a) the fanbase is particularly picky, or b) if the directors/producers/whoever in the production staff is lazy. In addition to this, movies can show the story from more perspectives than the book usually can and/or will, so it will often give different characters a larger role in order to be more engaging to the viewer (for example, spending more time with the villain than the book does, in order to build suspense). This, too, will often lead to changes in the plot.

This is why change when adapting books to movies is necessary: ultimately, books and movies are different mediums that have different rules of storytelling, and what works in one might not work in the other. Anyone who demands that books cannot be changed when adapting to movie is quite frankly not thinking about it hard enough.

(That said, there’s also something called ‘I don’t care’ syndrome in Hollywood, where they only use big-name books to market their movie, rather than try to make it a faithful adaptation (see also: Percy Jackson). This, understandably, pisses off the fans of the book. Frankly, I hate this. If you’re gonna adapt a book, at least try and make it resemble the original, please and thank you.)

This example got out of hand, but my point is that all mediums of storytelling are unique. Some quick examples of how other mediums (can) tell stories (under the cut bc this is already way too long whoops):

Comics are a medium between books and movies, in that they are a visual storytelling device, but can spend more time on developing their characters/plots/worlds than movies, because people are willing to buy multiple volumes of a comic.

American superhero comics are especially fascinating to me, because they’ve created such a vast universe that DC (and Marvel I’m pretty sure, though don’t quote me on it) have destroyed their entire universes multiple times just to try and get some control back over them (spoiler: it didn’t work). That stories can get so vastly out of hand seemingly without anyone noticing until it was too late is incredibly fascinating to me.

Video games are in a unique position because they are interactive; the player actively makes decisions in them. With some small examples like tabletop RPGs, visual novels (though you could argue those are games), and choose-your-own-adventure books, this is the only medium that has access to this. Because of this unique feature, they can incorporate things such as ‘karma’ endings (aka if you make bad choices you get a bad ending). They also have some other features they can utilize to make their storytelling more unique (such as the ‘save’ function, which Undertale did especially well), but I’ll leave that bc I suck at games so I know fairly little about them.

TV shows are like movies but better, imo. TV shows have the exact same advantages and disadvantages as movies, except that they have one thing movies do not: time. TV shows can take multiple episodes (the length of which varies, but serious adult shows seem to be around the 1 hour mark per episode) to tell their story, and thus they have the time to incorporate more detail/subplots than movies. Of course, this does mean that you need to learn how to pace TV shows differently than movies, and also you need to actually have the attention span to watch one (which. I do not. yikes).

Animation is yet another form of audio-visual storytelling, but this one has the added bonus of not needing to be limited by making things look ‘real’. In fact, it’s better if they do not. This makes animation one of the best types of media for fantasy/sci-fi shows that need more creative visual storytelling than live action movies/tv shows will allow.

Anime is a sub-genre of animation that I find particularly fascinating, because anime isn’t western, and therefore follows different storytelling rules than I’m used to. Just a little western animations vs anime comparison:

Western: moving characters, even in the background; animation quality is fairly consistent throughout the show (except maybe in the latter eps when they run out of budget); backgrounds are usually not that detailed; usually episodic rather than plot-driven; usually focuses primarily on humor rather than serious emotion/plot; primarily used as a medium for kids’ shows.

Anime: background is static, only lips of characters move; backgrounds tend to be very detailed; animation quality explodes during fight scenes/emotional climaxes; usually plot-driven rather than episodic; is more often used for serious storytelling than western animation; used equally as a medium for kids’ and adult shows (and can therefore delve into more mature themes than western animation generally does).

I know anime usually gets written off (at least in the west) either because people don’t like the art style or because of the ‘yaoiz/weaboo’ fanbase, but it’s a really unique medium of storytelling when it isn’t pandering to creepy men and/or pedophiles.

(Houston the anime industry has so many issues I’m gonna cry)

I’m too new to Podcasts to know clearly what the rules, advantages, and disadvantages to this type of storytelling would be, but with the huge success of podcasts like Critical Role and The Adventure Zone, I think that there is certainly a draw to this type of storytelling that no other has. I really should start listening to see if I can figure out what it is.

So yeah that’s basically my main special interest! Lots of me thinking about what the most innovative use of HP would be in a game, what the uses of live action vs animation is, whether a certain story is better told through TV or book, etc. etc. I love it so much and PLEASE if you have any questions ask me! But! Again, thanks for asking I love infodumping!

#personal posts #I'm.... so autistic lmao #mirrorverse

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hamliet · 6 years

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So what are your thoughts on TGsubreddit? It's honestly becoming worse these days because of the influx of childish people, especially migrants from 4ch who purposely invade tumblr and reddit to shitpost apparently. People get defensive over silly arguments about Kaneki being in the right or Mutsuki being a female, just arbitrary things. You get downvoted to oblivion if you don't have a hivemind way of thinking and it's basically a circlejerk. They swear Mutsuki deserves to die there too, like??

Well, Reddit is gonna Reddit. Basically my opinion is that you can’t control what people say or think, but you can control whether or not you want to give their opinions weight (the “Mutsuki is irredeemable” opinions I don’t give any weight to; whether he is or isn’t redeemed–and I strongly believe he will be, he absolutely is redeemable) or whether or not you want to subject yourself to reading them. I usually don’t because after all, I’m human, and emotionally driven, so seeing cruelty towards characters can make me sad even if it logically shouldn’t, but sometimes I’m bored and go on. If other people enjoy the debates and discussion there, though, power to them, I’m not intending to criticize those people at all. To each their own.

For my salty feminist take on Reddit, which I basically think of as the onscreen id of the toxically masculine teenage boy, see below:

I find that the atmosphere of Reddit (which isn’t to say everyone on there is like this) is highly Fanboy centered, and they’re really unkind and dismissive of female opinions, and it’s prone to bullying and mods are more often than not participants in that rather than stopping it as they should. They also are populated by people who seem to be in stories for the entertainment factor, or specifically for the badass factor. Emotions? Yuck. Vulnerability? Why would you bring that up? Gray morality? Hell no, just badassery.

So suffice to say that the TG subreddit doesn’t seem that different to me than the Star Wars subreddit, the other subreddit I used to go on (never really participated though, I only lurked). The SW subreddit was full of REY IS A SKYWALKER/SOLO and KYLO IS IRREDEEMABLE after TFA and lol guess what the (primarily) female fans who studied stories were actually right about where the story was going (and, you know, actually paid attention to themes and statements in the film–Maz legitimately tells us Rey is not related to the Skywalkers in TFA but did anyone want to pay attention? Not on Reddit).

They don’t like Mutsuki because Mutsuki provokes conversations about things that threaten their “badass or useless” view of the world. I’m hyperbolizing here but yeah. Like, you can’t even use male pronouns for Mutsuki. You know I don’t believe Mutsuki is intended to be a transgender character, and yet I still use male pronouns to be respectful of Mutsuki’s wishes. It’s fine if others use feminine pronouns because he’s a fictional character, but there’s no room for nuance on Reddit, and there’s especially no room for discussions of what it actually means to be a man, gender roles, or different opinions. The fact that Mutsuki provokes discussion of toxic masculinity and it can’t be ignored with his character arc whereas it can be with Urie’s (well, not really, but they ignore it because he’s lucky enough to have a penis) AND discussion of sexual abuse AND mental illness AND he’s darker-skinned than most of the cast? Why would they want to like a character like that? Mutsuki’s uncomfortable for them.

Also, the way Reddit treats female characters–blech. It doesn’t shock me that they really want Femtoneki–they want badassery more than they want a thematically sensical story. And it’s fine there’s nothing wrong with that, but there is a lot wrong with the misogyny and sexism I see on there. Kaneki showing vulnerability and weakness? Nope. Mutsuki having a vagina? Die crazy b*tch die even though like who has he actually hurt? Basically himself and that’s it? I saw people literally arguing for fucking euthanasia of Mutsuki, comparing it to putting a dying cat down. Like that’s some next level ableism there. Saiko is stanned because she saved Urie, a badass (even though his badass facade is killing him) and because specifically she did it with boobs. The moment she gets an arc I expect them to unstan her faster than you can say Reddit. Touka is appreciated only because she gives Kaneki sex and not for her own character arc. I’m not sure if they think Touka has a character arc or if her role is just about what she can give Kaneki; she’s a flawless sex object to them who saved Kaneki with sex. Hsiao is a badass and sexy so she’s liked (I mean, I like Hsiao because of her badassery and sexiness lol, but it’s like a pattern on Reddit). Akira? She’s emotionally repressed and women can’t be like that so she’s clearly awful to them. Basically women are reduced down to their sexual organs and how traditionally feminine they are, to which I say: f*ck you Reddit.

And one more thing. Their lack of understanding how stories work means I seldom take the hive’s opinion as having merit. Some really good ideas do come from Reddit, and there are plenty of reasonable people on there, it’s just that collectively I want to rub my grubby feminist hands over every subreddit and horrify them all.

#ask hamliet #hamliet gets salty #feminism #sexism #fandom misogyny #ableism tw #racism tw

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