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hazelfoureyes · 2 months

Text

The Safeword is RadioApple (part 1)

I’m gonna go ahead and apologize right now

Lucifer x FemaleReader x Alastor

Part 1 ꒰აMaleReader✧FemaleReader໒꒱ Part 2 ꒰აFemaleReader໒꒱ Part 3 ꒰აAlastorxLucifer໒꒱ tidbit (cute, not smut) Part 4 ꒰აFemaleReader໒꒱✨NEW✨ ₊⊹⁀➴ Lucifer wins⟡Alastor Wins

Alastor would give you anything, all you had to do was ask. When you asked for Lucifer, he delivered. But after seeing just how much you enjoyed Alastor’s rough handling, Lucifer takes a turn and gets a little lost in the pleasure.

tags/warnings/promises: Alastor x Reader, Lucifer x Reader, smut, RadioApple in a sense, fem reader, creampie, breath play, rough sex, Alastor is an eternal little shit, soft jazz, hard jazz, Luci calls himself Daddy, 🗣️ READER GETS SPITROASTED, threesome, cervix hulk smashed, half assed blowjob, help I got too horny on main

Minors dni

“Sir.”

Lucifer jumped, whipping around and shoving Alastor’s face away. “You are a living nightmare, fuck!” He hated being snuck up on, as most people do. Adjusting his hat, he looked around the hotel lobby to see if anyone else witnessed his personal jump scare. Charlie and Vaggie were seated nearby, but hadn’t paid them any attention.

“I aim to please! Now,” Alastor gestured to the stairs, “I, unfortunately, need to show you something upstairs.”

“Ha!” Lucifer forced out a laugh, “Ha. Haaa- Not a chance, scarecrow. Find someone else to search for your brain.” He smirked to himself. “Did you hear that Charlie? I made a joke.”

But Charlie was not laughing. She finally turned her focus to them. “Dad, you have to start trying to get along with Alastor.” She looked to Alastor who was nodding along as if he actually cared at all, “He’s trying to spend time with you. Come on, Dad. For me?”

With a pout, he dramatically crossed his arms, “Fine. I’ll play nice, for you. Not for him.” Lucifer glared daggers at Alastor. “Fuck him.”

“Daaad!” She groaned.

“Yeah yeah, I’m going.”

Alastor let his microphone follow behind Lucifer’s back, an unseen and unfelt safety net so he couldn’t back out. When they approached Alastor’s door, Lucifer put up his hands as if to physically stop the situation from progressing, “There is no way in all of hell I am going in your bedroom.”

Alastor’s eyes rolled, frustrated already with the interaction. “Are you sure about that?” He pushed the door open, using his mic to make contact with the small of Lucifer’s back. He stopped resisting when he finally looked into the room.

He took a step in, willingly, and as he saw you sitting in the center of the bed in just your silk sleep robe, he let out a quiet, “What the fuck is this?”

Then a louder, “Heeey, kitten…”. The sound of the door locking made his head whip back to Alastor, teeth bared.

“Luci.”

Softened under the sound of his own name from your lips he brought his attention back to the bed.

It was no secret to anyone that you two were fond of each other. It was the little things you did that endeared the fallen angel to you, how you doted on him. Filling his glass at dinner when you noticed it getting close to empty, holding the door for him, keeping eye contact when he went off on some excited tangent.

Everyone was also aware you were Alastor’s person. And Alastor would give you anything you wanted in death; and today you happened to want Luci.

You’d seen the broadcasts of the King of Hell defending his daughter during the last extermination. The power he gave off, even from your screen, brought goosebumps down your arms. So when you found your way to the hotel, you were elated to see Lucifer himself readily available for interactions. Your luck continued, as your father’s love of jazz had been passed down to you and allowed the radio demon to notice your presence among the sea of new residents. Following the sounds of Nat ‘King’ Cole, he found you one evening in your room, and a mutual fondness for music bore a new friend. And then, more.

Soon enough you were a regular member of the Hazbin Hotel core crew, by way of Alastor.

That’d been some months ago now, and you finally had the courage to ask Alastor for a special favor.

No part of him understood your motivation, but the idea of making the king of hell pussy-whipped to his darling was understanding enough. And, of course, the pleasure of watching you enjoy yourself. While he was capable all his own, he was happy to allow someone else to fill in. Not to mention—- no, actually, definitely mention the fact it would give him a little more power in the tense dynamic between himself and Lucifer.

For Alastor, sharing you physically wasn’t an issue. Sex was something he did for your pleasure, though he did enjoy the control he held over you in those intimate moments.

Watching you mewl under someone else, knowing he gave the permission, that Lucifer would never have a chance in Hell if The Radio Demon didn't allow it, made his head dizzy with the loss of blood flow. Whatever pleasure Lucifer could give you was pleasure he has granted you both. The idea of someone pining for you but never having a chance unless he says so made him feel powerful.

“I have a request, of sorts.” You tried to keep your smile still, cheeks twitching with pure nerves. The room was lit by only two small lamps on either nightstand and the light coming from the half open bathroom.

Lucifer approached you, making a dramatic point of going past Alastor. The radio demon chuckled, the king of hell scowled. He placed one knee on the end of the bed, trying to forget this was the spot you shared most nights with Alastor. His smile encouraged you to continue.

“You can say no.” You added quickly.

“Why would I ever do that?” Lucifer continued to smile at you, too sweetly for what you were going to ask.

“Many reasons.” You added quicker.

“Come on, tell Luci.” He laughed softly at the idea of denying you anything.

You pressed the tips of your index fingers together nervously, “I want you to fuck me.”

He tried to blink but his eyelids only seemed to rise further and further up his face with every attempt.

“You what now?”

His eyes darted to Alastor, who was now crawling onto the bed and settling behind you.

“It was a fairly straightforward statement, sir.” Alastor’s tone was always teetering on mocking when he addressed Lucifer, “My dear would like you, for some god awful reason, to bed her.”

If this hadn’t been such a shock, Lucifer would have quipped, “Oh because you can’t, you overdressed maitre d’?”

But when he opened his mouth, there was nothing. He just stared at you. Alastor’s long legs and lanky arms came down beside you, behind you. You looked like the enticing light of an angler fish’s lure, sharp teeth shining just over your shoulder.

“I thought-,” he motioned between the two of you.

You nodded, “Alastor is happy when I’m happy. And right now, I’d be overjoyed to spend an evening taking care of you.”

Oh, why couldn’t you have said it so sweetly the first time? Take care of him? You always did. Every time he felt something lacking he’d find you close behind offering him just the thing.

Whether a smile, or supportive word, or just a sympathetic ear.

Shifting onto your hands and knees, you crawled toward Lucifer. His face was flush, his brows knitted together in some mix of worry and confusion.

“You don’t have to do that, kitten. I don’t need that.” He reached out a hand to touch your cheek but stopped himself; he’d never touched you before. He had gone out of his way to avoid it, because he couldn’t bear what it would do to him. He’d just be hurting himself, he had thought. His hand began to pull away but you reached out with both of yours and took hold of his wrist.

“I don’t have to do anything, ever, Luci,” Alastor’s grin widened as you said it. A hum of approval only he could hear. A silent, ‘That’s my girl.’

“This is about what I want.” You leaned up to rest your cheek in his open palm, “I’ll accept any answer from you.” Your eyes staring up at him promised safety, “So, what do you want?”

He buried his face in his free hand, opening his fingers to look over you once more. In the shade of the canopied bed, Alastor sat motionless. But Lucifer couldn’t see him, not because of the shadows but because his focus was so purely on you. He had absolute tunnel vision, which happened often when you two would speak. Lucifer made a low sound, coming from somewhere deep in his chest, hidden beneath all his shame and sense of inadequacy.

Your question was answered as he removed his hat, tossing it to the chaise lounge near the wall. You sat back on your legs and gave him space to remove his coat. Your heart seemed to double its pace, skin practically vibrating. A not-insignificant part of you expected a gentle but firm, “kindly fuck off.”

He seemed to be avoiding eye contact as he pulled his bow tie loose, only returning his knee to the bed when he’d kicked off his boots. Just the shifting of the weight of the bed made your thighs twitch, finally. Alastor leaned backed and watched, Lucifer’s gaze was full of uncertainty as he crawled to you.

Hilarious. Already worth the price of admission.

Both on your knees, you leaned up and placed a chaste kiss on Lucifer’s lips. Pulling back, you looked at him and he felt like we’re looking at the sun. Your face was so bright, and warm. What light were you reflecting back at him? Surely not his own. That was long dead. Long buried under bruised wings and lost promises.

You snaked your fingers into his hair and brought him in for a deeper kiss. When you bit gently on his bottom lip, he shakily opened his mouth. Your grin spread across both of your faces as you pushed your way past his lips.

Lucifer’s tongue was long, and tapered more than you’d expected. It moved, unsure, against yours. Your hands slunk out of his hair and down his chest, sliding until finding the buttons of his vest.

You felt him gasp into you, and when you began to open his shirt he pulled away, “It’s been… a very long time.”

A scream echoed in your skulll, your own scream, thankfully entirely in your mind. He was so cute. So soft. He looked so worried, you wanted to rip him to pieces with affection. Was that possible? You were going to try.

Your hands fumbled over his belt, the tremble in your fingers making the pants button feel like an aptitude test. Your mouth returned to him, kissing down his cheeks and into the space under his jaw. Finally you could slip your hand down into his pants, and you hissed without thinking.

He was painfully hard, throbbing head pressed into his skin.

Did you do this? Had you gotten the King like this with just a question and a kiss? Tip nearly purple with pressure, you rested your forehead on his collarbone and watched his stomach jump as you wrapped your fingers around it.

Alastor fought back a laugh, tongue nearly cut clean off with the attempt. This was better than he had expected. And he had just the idea to push it over the top.

When your head dipped to swipe your tongue over Lucifer’s cock, you both startled at the sudden sound of music. First you looked to the radio, then to Alastor.

One hand was loosening his bow tie, the other unbuckling his pants.

“Don’t stop on my accord,” he bit his bottom lip, watching your attention return to Lucifer’s lap.

Lucifer raised a finger in protest, “I wasn’t aware this was a group activity.”

“The more the merrier.” Alastor whipped his belt off and tossed it to the floor, other hand pulling his member free.

“Three’s a crowd.”

“Two heads are better than one.” When Alastor lifted your robe away and sunk himself into you, no preparation, you moaned into the blonde hair at the base of Lucifer’s cock.

Your breath over his shaft and now down his balls made his hips buck against you. Your hands gripped at Lucifer’s thighs, trying to get steady enough to return your mouth to his waiting heat. You could smell his arousal, your head dizzy with so many of your senses being assaulted by both men.

“You okay, kitten?” A concerned hand came to your cheek.

Your watery, lust clouded eyes met his, “It feels so good, Luci.” His dick jerked. When you finally managed to get him in your mouth his head fell back, legs under him twitching with the need to move along to the bobbing of your head. Lucifer was wider than Alastor, the corners of your mouth burning as you tried to take in as much of him as possible.

Alastor’s hand raked long nails down your back, a whine ran from your throat and down Lucifer’s shaft. He moaned in turn, trying to not connect the dots between himself and Alastor.

“I think you may need a little demonstration, from someone more–, “ Alastor leaned down, his face now inches from Lucifer’s. His hand wrapped around your neck, “experienced.” He pulled you up by your throat.

Lucifer watched, your knees no longer touching the bed as Alastor fucked up into you. One hand gripping your throat, one arm holding your body against his. Your face began to redden, and your thighs noticeably clenching as best they could, legs open and feet on either side of Alastor’s body. Lucifer winced, you looked pained, he wanted—

“Aa--Alastor,” Your voice was like honey, thick and sweet around Alastor’s name. Lucifer’s face fell flat, how could he have that? What did he need to do to have you say his name in such a debauched way? Why did that gangly sack of bones get all of the fun?

“See? She can handle more than you’d expect.” Alastor grinned, planting a kiss on your neck. You could see Lucifer watching through your wet eyelashes, his cock twitching repeatedly as his hand finally came down to touch himself.

With the hand not holding onto Alastor’s wrist at your throat, you reached out for Lucifer. “Luci.”

Alastor let you fall forward. Keeping your hips in the air and knees dangling just above the comforter, he continued his rough pace into your sopping cunt. Pulling your body on and off of his length with harsh drags he watched you lick from the base to the top of Lucifer’s member. Each thrust from him knocking your chin against it.

When you popped the head back into your mouth and moaned around it from Alastor’s continued fucking, Lucifer gripped your hair with both hands. Alastor’s own erection jumped in you, the king of hell himself buckling from his dearest’s mouth. He could break him entirely by just pulling you off of Lucifer’s cock and refusing to return you. He was positive Lucifer would cry into his ruined orgasm if he did such a thing.

Tempting.

But, he promised to play along, for you. And he would, at his own terms.

He pushed aside the thought entirely, instead returning to the task in front of him. Your tongue was pinned down when Lucifer was in your mouth, cock too fat to allow any room for movement. You abandoned trying to suck him off, and changed tactics to lick and kiss the sensitive flesh in your hands.

Lucifer’s mind was—- he wasn't sure where exactly. His consciousness splintered around you. The feeling of you; your tongue was swirling around him, the first contact he’s had other than himself in literal years. The sound of you; your soft moans and huffs were both audible and physical, the hot breath ghosting over him. The sight of you; head in his lap as he leaned back, your ass in the air and making a satisfying slapping noise every time–

Alastor. His eyes met Lucifer’s and a wicked grin took hold of his features. Lucifer could practically hear Alastor whisper across your body, ‘Watch this.’ Maybe Alastor had thought it, but he kept it to himself.

Your hands began pumping Lucifer’s length while your body was slightly dragged away as Alastor backed up and let your knees find some solid ground again.

Lucifer sat on his legs still, eyes flitting from between your face to the place you and Alastor connected. He could see Alastor disappearing inside you, and every intrusion had you gasping and mewling into the blankets. Your hand was still gently stroking him with outstretched arms, eyes clenched close.

Alastor smirked up at Lucifer, coming down over your back to reach around your body and find your clit with his middle finger. Immediately, you reacted. Legs squeezing together, hands stilling around your king’s cock. With a bite and lick to your shoulder blade, the radio demon set a bruising pace against you. That warmth in your core was spreading down as you felt him press against your cervix with every kiss of his hips.

You choked out his name, a chant Lucifer had never wanted to hear before now. How could you make Alastor’s name sound so delicious? He wrapped his fingers around yours on his dick and began moving with you. Your eyes rolled up to him, a weak smile forming before your orgasm made your jaw lock. Alastor knew your body so well, bringing you to orgasm was like playing a well practiced song on the piano. Both required strong and fast fingers and a sense of rhythm.

With a few more deeper, shorter moves Alastor stilled, too. Your knees slid down as your hips sank into the bed.

Lucifer let your hand go limp, swallowing hard. He wasn’t ignorant to the way Alastor smiled at him as he reclined into the headboard, tucking himself back into his pants.

“I have complete faith in you, for once.” Alastor teased Lucifer, hand motioning to your still limp body. His smile seemed to dare Lucifer, challenge him, to keep going even with Alastor’s release sitting pretty in you.

Luci took a deep breath, steadying himself mentally, before pushing the hair from your forehead, “Hey there, kitten. What do ya need?”

With an uncharacteristic hunger in your eyes, you forced your line of sight up to him, “You, Luci.” Visibly shuddering, you sat up and brought your legs towards him, your knees touching each other in an odd display of shyness. Your hand felt at your entrance, Alastor’s seed just beginning to find its way from your relaxed walls.

“Is it okay?” You asked, spreading the thick fluid between your fingers in front of Luci.

Something between a grimace and a pout came over him, it wasn’t his ideal situation but the idea of — just how much he’d slip and slide between your folds with the added lubrication made him feel feral. He wasn’t stupid, he knew Alastor hoped to ruin you and sour his experience. He decided to not allow it.

With a kiss to his nose, you wrapped your arms around his neck and lied back. You weren’t sure you were breathing anymore when you felt his scorching head slot up with your entrance. He rubbed the leaking fluid over himself and you with swipes up and down your lips. The difference between his heat and the cooled cum made him shiver in turn.

As he began to press into you, your body instinctively scooted away. It took both of your hands hooked under his arms to stay still enough for him to make any real headway.

Luci stopped, your face clearly pained. Your head shook in response, “Please, you just have to keep going. I’ll adjust.” While both of his heads swelled with pride – Alastor’s cock clearly smaller – Luci didn’t notice the wild eyes of the radio demon.

Alastor brought a hand to his face, red eyes peering between his spread fingers, smile threatening to break at the seams as he watched Lucifer Morningstar fucking his cum into his darling doe.

What a pitiful sight. How humiliating.

What would Charlie think of her big bad daddy? What would the other sins say? If they could see their king now, slick and shiny?

Your nails cut into his skin, and you were sure you were tearing slightly. Instead of attempting to thrust his way in, he chose to just continually press. The way your body seemed to be splitting made you second guess your decisions. But when his head finally popped in, your hole got some reprieve. He stopped, taking deep breaths.

Tears were collecting on your waterline, Luci noticed and leaned on an elbow to wipe them away. His blonde hair was falling forward now, tickling at your forehead.

You nodded, answering a question he didn’t ask, and he continued to force your walls open to accommodate him. The only sound in the room was the soft instrumental jazz number playing from atop the dresser. Your voice was stuck in your throat, Luci was focusing too hard to form words. Alastor could speak, but the music was just too enjoyable to interrupt.

Finally, after what could have been two minutes or twenty, you felt Luci bottom out. You had to just lie there for a second, never having felt something so solid in your otherwise soft body. No slight to Alastor, who was perfectly skilled in his abilities. Luci was just—- more than you had expected.

As he pulled out, you thanked the heavens and hell and the rings within that Alastor had left you so wet and already softened. The first few thrusts were genuinely uncomfortable, the pleasure you felt almost entirely mental, drawn from the reality of who was pulling your insides back and forth. You were so tight around him that he too was almost pained; so much pressure but no way to move enough to get any release.

Slowly, the ring of your entrance relented and Luci could finally move at a normal pace. He would take himself out to his head before slipping back in. Every thrust made your body spread around him, a semi-truck through a field of sunflowers. Your body didn’t stand a chance, and you were grateful he chose gentleness for his entrance.

He leaned back on both hands, using the position to fucked up into you at an angle. He knew very well where to hit to begin gathering your pleasure.

Alastor dropped his head, yours between his legs. His hair made a short curtain, hiding the look he was giving you from Luci. He adores the faces you make when you are happy. Excited. Pleasured. You tried to offer him a smile, but you couldn’t manage it for long. Your eyes would wretch shut, lips tighten as you focused on the feeling Luci was providing. Focused on the sensations, of being so full, so wet, so wanted. But Alastor was still watching, the sight of Luci blocked from his view as he enjoyed every little twitch of your mouth, every whimper.

It wasn’t jealousy, it was something more personal that stung Luci. While he couldn’t actually discern the looks you two gave each other, Luci felt very much the odd man out. But, he considered his position. Literally. He was leaning as far from your body as he could. He remembered the way you said Alastor’s name. Alastor had showed him exactly what to do, albeit in his usual obnoxious, showy fashion.

Sitting up, Luci adjusted your legs and slotted himself between them. Alastor leaned back, relinquishing your focus. Both of you looked at Luci though as one of his hands came to enclose your throat.

Alastor was almost impressed. Almost. You brought both hands to wrap around his wrist, glancing to Alastor behind you.

The words came out of Alastor as half warning, half instruction, “If she needs you to stop, she’ll tap two fingers twice on you, wherever she can reach.” Lucifer nodded, eyes not meeting Alastor’s. He kept them on your face, watching for any sign of distress as he tightened his grip. The way your pussy clenched around him earned you a hiss.

He began to move again, the new position causing him to rub against your clit as he buried himself in you. More clenching; He tightened his grip more.

“Are you sure she isn’t hurting?” Luci asked, your eyes closed and nails digging into his wrists.

“Nonsense. Can’t you feel her? Or does she just grip me like that?” The cocky expression made Luci unconsciously clench his fist on your neck. A gentle tap tap snapped him back to you. He loosened up again, his eyes large and apologetic.

You tightened your own grip on his dick, grinding up into him for more friction. Your body had finally relaxed, pleasure freely flowing from where you and Luci tangled together. You closed your eyes, the pressure constant on the veins to your head. Blood flow restricted just enough to lower your oxygen levels and raise the nitrogen oxide in your body. It resulted in a dizzying feeling, maybe there was a primal panic that caused your body to feel heightened pleasure. You didn’t feel scared, or in danger. You felt —— ah there it was. You felt weak. You felt docile. You felt like you existed purely to give pleasure and the idea turned you on. In every day life you’d never allow someone to use you, to push you around. You were anything but subservient. That’s why it was so enthralling now. It was so strange a sensation. And to give yourself so fully to the king of hell, the originator of all sin? You groaned, head rolling back.

Luci watched your head loll, drank in your groans and gasps and felt himself get dizzy too. More. Say his name like you did Alastor’s. Praise how well he fucked you. Reward him. Love him.

He pulled out suddenly, his head leaving you for the first time since it managed to fit in initially. Luci put both hands on your hips and directed you to roll onto your stomach. He pulled your ass up, knees bent. You crawled up enough to rest your forehead on the crook of Alastor’s leg, one lazily outstretched and the other bent under him slightly. Luci wasted no time pushing back in. He leaned over you and pressed his hand into your back, forcing your chest to be slightly crushed into the bed. He pulled out and slammed back into you, tearing a yelp from you as he hit deeper than he had before.

He stopped, unsure, until he felt your hand reach under yourself and rest at the junction of his knee and calf. His other hand came to your right hip, and he used it to keep you from sliding up the bed. Letting his eyes close again, he focused on the feeling of you around him. His crotch and thighs were soaking wet, his balls tight against him. Every drag out of you made his body jerk back into you with need. It felt so good, too good. He needed more. He pressed hard into you, oversized tip of his cock threatening to push past your cervix. He made shorter thrusts now, ensuring he bottomed out every time. It was too deep, too much of a stretch. Your moans slowly devolved into screams, the pleasure mixed with a soft burning.

You could feel him spreading open your womb. The feeling of your cunt pressing down on him from all sides including the front was driving him mad.

You were screaming. Actual, pleasured screams, threatening to alert the entire hotel to your activities. Screams that started shrill and dipped into a gutteral cry filled the room with every thrust of Lucifer’s frenzied hips.

A tiny part of your brain felt embarrassed, a dying animal shrieking into Alastor’s thigh.

An ever shrinking part of Lucifer existed too, the piece of him too preoccupied with your two fingers on his leg to enjoy you. It got smaller and smaller, no longer a blockade to his pleasure, but a safety net allowing him to walk the tightrope of sadism.

The radio’s volume dial rolled, smooth jazz now blaring and drowning out your painfully pleasured cries. Alastor was fine with allowing someone to take care of your needs at his permission but strangers had no business enjoying your sounds.

As Luci became lost in the sensation of your wet pussy trying to suck him in whole, his hand on your back began to press down. Your breaths got shorter, it got harder to expand your lungs fully.

Face turned and drooling onto the fabric of Alastor’s pants, you started gasping out his name, “Luci! Nngh Luciiii, Lucifer.”

Your lips dropped his name and it fell like lead into his thoughts. He fought the urge to close his eyes again as he felt his orgasm building. He watched your flushed skin jump beneath every punishing thrust, his name a spell you could now barely whisper, not enough breathe to scream. Your upper body was entirely buried into the mattress. It felt like your back might snap with Luci’s loss of control. You kept your hand on his leg, ever ready to tap out.

The yellow of his eyes turned red, just like the skin of your ass where his hip bones chaffed. “You take me so well, kitten.” He ground out, “Daddy’s gonna cum.”

Alastor’s eyes glowed a blood red from the end of the bed, a wickedly devious grin across his face at the opportunity before him, he looked up at Luci and said with a commanding tone, “Cum.”

Luci was already over that peak when his eyes flew up to catch Alastor’s, it was too late to stop his orgasm. He was helpless to disobey, despite his now desperate desire to never cum again. With a moan, and a hiss, he pressed your body fully into the mattress. Your body now flush, he waited until his cock stopped jerking his long overdue seed into your bruised womb.

Luci lied on top of you even after you were full to the brim with his cum. It was already forcing its way out around his softening cock when he managed to roll off of you and onto his back.

Staring at the canopy of the bed, he felt two emotions rise to the surface. First, concern. He turned to you, and you gave a weak thumbs up.

Second, rage.

“What the actual fuck is wrong with you? Fuck you.” He looked to Alastor, who was grinning as he pet your head, whispering something to you.

“Little late for dirty talk, your highness.”

Lucifer growled, but Alastor’s palm pressed against his forehead and pushed him back down to the bed.

“I sleep on the left. I’d prefer you on the right.” he gently moved your head from his lap, “Beside me, my dear. A darling barrier.” Alastor didn’t look at Lucifer, just slid off the bed and walked into the en-suite bathroom. “No outside clothes under the comforter.” Alastor called from the bathroom before the sound of rushing water poured in.

You rolled onto your back, still catching your breath. Body sprawled out on the massive bed like a starfish.

Lucifer turned onto his side, hand caressing your arm. “Are you okay, kitten? I didn’t mean to lose myself like that.” He felt shame, like he had done something terrible. “And— I didn’t help you finish. That’s pretty shitty.”

But it fell away when you smiled back at him, “I feel great. Sore, but great all the same.” You let your fingers clumsily lace with his. “I really like you, Luci. And I don’t need to cum to enjoy myself. You can always try again, ya know?”

Lucifer felt his face grow warm, but couldn’t press you to clarify what exactly that meant before Alastor scooped you up and carried you to the bath.

There was a moment where he was alone, noticing the radio was back to a tolerable volume, the water splashing softly out of view. He felt out of place, like he had accidentally walked into a stranger’s home. He wasn’t sure what to do next, where to go from there when Alastor’s head popped back into the room, annoyed, “Are you coming or not? Those are clean sheets.”

༻Masterlist༺

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gurugirl · 21 days

Note

I need a breeding kink blurb PLS 🙏🙏🙏

⛔️ WARNING ‼️ SMUTTY SMUT BREEDING KINK SIZE KINK ALL THE KINK (enjoy 🤭) + plus a link to an audio porn on tumblr to really get into that wet pussy sound 🙈 I'm so sorry in advance but I am in fact ovulating according to my calculator and this was... Anyway there's no plot, this is basically only smut. PLEASE DON'T READ IF YOU'RE NOT INTO THIS KIND OF THING THANK YOU

587 words

😈😈😈😈

"Oh baby... look a'you... getting stuffed so deep. Loves getting her little pussy filled up and bred yeah? Need Daddy's come honey? Need me to put more babies in this belly? Fuck you til your tummy's swollen, your tits are full of milk, and pussy ruined?"

"Mmm..." you tried moaning but you were out of breath and your gargled noises were stifled by the way he was plowing into you, long and heavy strokes that dipped into your guts and punched the air from your lungs. All you could do was lie there with your legs spread apart as he fucked the life from you. His fat cock was making your walls ache he'd been going at if for so long.

"Can't speak, little mama? Don't want the kids to hear do we? That's right... just let daddy fuck you til your come hole is full of my sperm and let it sink in deep so I can knock you up over and over again. Likes her pussy stuffed with cock and come and her womb full of babies..."

Harry loved it when you were pregnant. You already had two kids and he was raring to go for a third. But so were you. You loved watching him be a dad. And you'd love to see him holding another tiny baby again - your tall, tattooed, and strong husband holding that delicate bundle against his chest with tears in his eyes, humming a tune and swaying slowly back and forth. Just for that, you'd give him as many babies as he wanted.

"Already had you stuffed with all my cream this morning, now here you are all sweaty and gagging for more. Fucking need it don't you? Gonna take my come honey? Little mama wants it, yeah?"

You could barely nod but you managed to knock your head back and forth. You were exhausted after he'd already given you two orgasms but now you could feel him coming to his end, his arms were shaking and his thrusts were getting sloppy with that big cock twitching as he stretched your walls. His impressive size was addicting.

"You ready? Think you can take another load?"

"Mmmm..." a pathetic wet mumble fell from your lips as Harry choked out a groan, trying to keep quiet so as not to wake the kids and you felt him throb and throb as he dropped his mouth open wide and pasted his hips against yours, unloading hours and hours worth of vital come into your womb, his balls emptying every drop inside of you.

You were very much done for by the time he pulled out but Harry wasn't. He angled your hips up with a heaving chest and stuffed himself back inside, holding his shaft to keep steady as he fucked his come into you, "There we go. Let's get that all in there," he watched as he dipped inward, keeping you full of his sperm, wet squelches (NSFW LINK - opens up a tumblr audio porn, no visuals 😈) coming from your pussy with the way he was plunging back into you to make sure his come didn't leak out, "Get that pussy fed and happy," he hissed as he pumped in gently, his cock sensitive to the touch after his orgasm.

He enjoyed the view of it... your shiny puffy pussy wrapped around his thick shaft as he pushed his come back inside you until he couldn't stay hard any longer. You were sure that was baby number three.

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Tags: @michellekstyles @yousunshineyoutempter @tenaciousperfectionunknown @golden-hoax @swiftmendeshoran @luvonstyles @tiaamberxx @lukesaprince @closureesny @justlemmeadoreyou @itsgigikay @angelbabyyy99 @lanadelharry @novasblogofstuff @gills-lounge @damnasstyles @malwtilda @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite @babybunharry @anothermannharry @love-letters-to-uranus @itjustkindahappenedreally @ssaama @onlyangellucifer @harryistheonlyoneforme @butdaddyilovehim-hs @reveriehs @lc-fics @mema10 @carmenxharry @hannahdressedasabanana @babegoalsreads @harrrrystylesslut @elidoho @bananabk9756 @gotdrxnkonu @freedomfireflies @cathy-1997 @imgonnadreamaboutthewayyoutaaaa @lightsoutstyles @certainlysyko

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hippolotamus · 3 months

Text

Sentence Sunday 🪩

Tagged by @daffi-990 @tizniz @theotherbuckley @diazsdimples @disasterbuckdiaz @monsterrae1 @indestructibleheart for some combination of Inspiration Saturday/Seven Sentence Sunday (tagging you back for SSS if you haven't already) Be sure to check out their moodboards and snippets. I am excited for all of your works! 😘

I wanted to put together a moodboard for the mirrorball fic, but it's not quite there yet. So, sans moodboard, have this bit of Buck talking with Ali and Chim. Prev snippet here.

“Looks like Romeo’s back,” Ali sing songs in Buck’s ear as she passes his station on the way to her own. “Oh, yeah?” He aims for nonchalant but knows he’s failed miserably by the smirk on her face. Ali sits in front of her mirror, picks up a wide-tooth comb, and runs it through her short, espresso strands. The color is a recent switch from her previous summery blond and he’ll admit it suits her. “God, Buck, I swear if you had a tail it would be wagging so hard right now.” To be fair, he’s been more than a little mopey for the last two weeks since his stranger high-tailed it out of the club and didn’t come back. It left Buck in a strange mood. He’s been out of sorts, like a teetering Jenga tower. One seemingly insignificant piece displaced and he’s scrambling for balance again. “Just to make sure,” Buck tries again to sound unaffected, though he’s not sure why. He already feels the eager, needy tone clinging to his words. “You’re not, uh, fucking with me… right? He’s really there?” She angles her body towards him, all traces of teasing replaced by an almost sisterly affection. “I know how much this has been eating you up. I promise he’s there, Buck.”

...

Buck sticks to the hallways, circumventing the main club as he makes his way to the booth. Chim’s eyes widen as he takes in Buck swiftly approaching. “Buck,” he hisses. “What the hell are you doing here? You’re on in less than ten.” “I need to switch my music for tonight.” Buck ignores the face journey he knows Chim is currently going through. He’s seen it plenty of times, mostly because of his – as Chim calls it – ‘boneheaded piss poor planning’. It's not exactly wrong. “I swear to god, Buckley. One of these days-” “I’m gonna give you a heart attack,” Buck finishes for him. “You’re gonna do it though.” It’s not a question. Chim has never once failed him, no matter how much he obviously wanted to. Chim scrubs a hand down his face, breathing out a world weary sigh. “Tell me what to queue up before I change my mind.”

no pressure tagging (if you wanna) @thewolvesof1998 @loserdiaz @wildlife4life @buckaroosheart @eddiebabygirldiaz @spotsandsocks @wikiangela @fortheloveofbuddie @steadfastsaturnsrings @elvensorceress @honestlydarkprincess @spaceprincessem @shortsighted-owl @stereopticons @apothecarose @barbiediaz @buddierights @chaosandwolves @eowon @giddyupbuck @heartshapedvows @hoodie-buck @jesuisici33 @ladydorian05 @lemonzestywrites LOML @lizzie-bennetdarcy @rmd-writes @statueinthestone @singlethread @the-likesofus @theplaceyoustillrememberdreaming @vanillahigh00 @watchyourbuck @welcometololaland @your-catfish-friend and anyone else who wants to share 💖

#ali felt like a good friend for buck to have in this universe #and chim is precisely as exasperated by buck's shenanigans as you'd expect #bless that poor man #also #if chim's *there*... where's hen???#hold that thought #buddie wip #mirrorball fic #hippo writes #seven sentence sunday #except not really #fic: watch my shattered edges glisten

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f1stargirll · 6 months

Text

Conversation Friends ° Lando Norris

Chapter Two

Word count : 1.658k

Description : slow burn, college!au (enemies to lovers) and more to come

Hey guys, sorry this chapter came out a week late, I was suffocating from homework. But here we are! And I'm currently on a week break from uni so I'll try to write as much as possible during this time, I have sooo many ideas. I think I'll even try writing oneshots so if anyone has requests I'm open to them! Hope you'll enjoy this chapter, and feel free to message me if you want to be tagged in the next parts 🧚🏼‍♀️

PSA : Since I’m STUPID, I’ve started writing on a side blog which means there’s a lot of things I can’t do!! So I’m switching to my main blog which is @f1stargurl !!! The next parts and the rest will be posted on there, so if anyone follows me here, if you could pls follow me on @f1stargurl 🤧 To quote mister Leclerc once ai gain, “I am stupid”

Hi Lando,

I’m sorry we got off on the wrong foot. I’m sure that stupid encounter at the supermarket was just a result of the both of us being irritated and tired. As you can probably tell, my first few days here weren’t so easy and it might’ve been one of the reasons why I was so unpleasant, and once again, I apologize.

I really am willing to put this stupid history behind us and get this program started!

I hope you’ll give it a thought and I look forward to hearing from you soon, have a good week!

Sincerely, y/n

It’s been six days since I’ve sent Lando that email and pushed my pride to the side to organize a date. Well, it’s not a date, but still- I guess it is technically a date? Is it a date if we hate each other? It’s a meeting. Yeah, I was trying to organize a meeting.

Still no response.

Closing my laptop, I decided to take my mind off this situation and take a break at a coffee shop near campus.

Taking a step inside the coffee shop I spot Daniel and Alex sipping on their drinks. Seeing Daniel again instantly put a smile on my face, we’ve been hanging out these last few days and having him by my side feels great.

“What’s up guys!” I say while waving at them across the room.

“Hey y/n!” They both got up from their seats to give me a hug.

“Go get your drink and come join us,” Alex invited me, pointing at their booth, “we were talking about the party this weekend.”

“Don’t mind if I do then”, I respond smiling from ear to ear.

After picking up my hot chocolate I sit down in front of them, Daniel makes fun of me for not liking coffee, again.

“I swear y/n you’re 21 and you still don’t like coffe? You need to grow up,’ rolling my eyes, I playfully shove Dani’s shoulder feeling his muscle tense under the light punch, so annoying, and buff, wow. We kept talking for more than two hours. I got to tell them all about Lando ghosting me and about the amazing cheese and garlic pasta I made last night.

“I think he’ll come to his senses. He has to,” Daniel insists, crossing his arms in front of him. Ooh, veiny forearms… “the reason you guys hate each other is so ridiculous anyway, over freaking pasta!” he shakes his head in disbelief.

“I think you did the right thing trying to reach out, at least you’ll be the bigger person” Alex says, his hand reaching for his matcha latte, “I’m sure you’ll be able to figure this out together.”

“Thanks for the optimism I really appreciate it” I say with a weak smile, not really believing in Linguini’s philanthropist potential, “I just hope this won’t ruin the program for me…”

“What? No way!” Daniel exclaims sitting up on his side of the booth, “Look, you’ve got your Conversation Friends right here” he says putting his arm around Alex’s shoulder who’s nodding and smiling in agreement, “and you’ve got Lola!”

“You’re right Dani, I’m not gonna give myself anxiety over a guy who can’t even be polite,” I state with confidence, “anyways, I’m so excited about the party this weekend!”

Once back in my room, I decided to check my inbox one more time. Just in case.

Still no response.

The sight tugs at my heart a little. We have our first mandatory meeting in a few days and I still have no contact with my partner. I wouldn’t care so much about it if it was just about the two of us, but the whole group is supposed to visit a museum and I don’t want to be the only one there without a partner, that would be too embarrassing.

But as I reminisce on the topic, I realize I’m not just sad anymore, I’m bitter. All week I saw everyone meeting up and doing fun activities with their partners, but I can’t get an email back? Even a “k” would’ve been enough… I’m stunned at how childish this boy is being.

Putting my phone on my wooden nightstand, I close my eyes and try not to overthink about the situation. Is it my personality? Maybe it’s because of the way I look.

But I catch myself slipping, the last thing I need to do is to start doubting myself because of a man again.

God, this British Society class is really kicking my ass right now. Why did I even choose the 8am one, what is wrong with me? The professor starts off the first chapter of the class as we hear a loud knocking on the door.

“Sorry I’m late,” I see Lando standing in the doorway, out of breath, his cheeks a light pink from the rush. His eyes search around the room for any seat still available until they meet mine. There’s one right next to me, but of course he’ll never take that one. He sets down his bag on the table front row and I feel my heart racing from embarrassment as my mind instantly jogs back to the email and how vulnerable it was. He turns around a final time and blankly looks at me. What is that supposed to mean?

The class went by slower than ever, my mind speeding about different ways to go up to him and finally settle this ridiculous situation.

8:55 finally strikes the clock as the professor concludes his explanation. As I put away my computer I see Lando clutching his books and bolting towards the exit.

Not on my fucking watch. I head for his direction, calling out his name, “Lando! LANDOO!”

He turns on his heels in a swift motion, “What do you want from me?”

Suddenly feeling small, I still mustered up the courage to ask him about what’s going on, “Well you’ve read my email so I don’t know why you’re acting like you don’t know,” I grumble. “I feel like I’m making way too much effort here.”

“What email? What are you even talking about?” he asks, his thick brows furrowing in irritation. “I didn’t even give you my real email, the one I wrote down was just to fill the blank so the teacher won’t bug me,” he explains, still slightly confused as to what I was on about, “I just don’t want us to communicate outside of the mandatory attendings, got it ? We’ll meet there and that’s it.”

Well, at least that explains the total ghosting, doesn’t make it any less humiliating though. My lips close in a tight line, “Message received then, glad to know you’ll still be there for the museum,” I slowly nod my head trying to process what I’ve just been told. I feel my throat tightening up a bit and decide to leave before embarrassing myself any further, never looking behind me at the curly haired boy.

Standing in line in front of the museum’s ticket office with my two favorite boys feels like we’re high schoolers on a field trip. I still feel uneasy about this upcoming afternoon, even if the run-in we had was terrible, he still assured me he’ll be coming today.

But now, I don’t even want him to be here, I’m done with the idea of making any efforts with him, I’ve been way too kind to him. I’ll just stay glued to Dani and Alex and spend a nice afternoon at the museum with them, it’ll be way more fun than if he ever was to be here.

“Still no news from Linguini?” Alex asks, trying to make sense of this situation, probably feeling bad for me. I really was pitiful.

“It’s not like I have a way of having any.” I half-joke trying to keep face despite anxiety and sadness creeping their way into my heart;

I found myself gazing at a beautiful photograph of a peony field, my favorite flower. The exhibition was showcasing the origins and the beauty of perfumes around the world. It involved a path filled with elements used to make our favorite scents through the use of pictures and different aromas being diffused all around the museum. I had clinged on to my favorite boys for twenty minutes before the teacher noticed, “I don’t care if your partner isn’t here, it’s a pairing of two only.” So now I was wandering around the exhibition and taking in the great sights and scents on my own.

“Hey,” I turned around to see Lando looking ahead standing next to me, his hair covered by a green cap matching the crew neck sitting on his shoulders and the color of his eyes. Last time I thought they were blue, but they’re not. They’re the most gorgeous shade of olive green I had ever seen. It bothered me that I noticed these kinds of small details about him, he was the last person to deserve it. “Sorry I’m late.”

I kept my focus on the piece in front of me, “Alright.”

“Alright.”

“These are my favorite, my grandma used to grow some in her garden,” I tell him without really knowing why.

“My grandma had roses, those are nice too,” he answers, I just nod in agreement. We both keep looking at the photograph in silence for another minute when his phone starts to ring.

“Hey babe,” he quickly picks up, “yeah it’ll be quick I promise - no I don’t care I just have to do this, you know that.” Wow, way to ruin the last speck of hope I had. He hangs up as fast as he picked up.

“You know you could’ve just told me you had a girlfriend and didn’t want to talk to me for that reason, I mean, It’s a little extreme but I get it.” I know that some girlfriends are overprotective and the idea of their boyfriends spending time with another girl can be a nightmare.

“It's not about her,” he spits out, “I just don’t want to be here, I’ve got better things to do,” and with that final sentence he rubs the salt in a wound that’s already way too deep for what it’s worth.

“You don’t have to be here though, nobody’s forcing you to” I remark, my voice filled with resentment. I’ve had enough.

“I do, though. I’m only doing this to pass my semester, so let’s just wrap this up,” he starts going for the rest of the exhibition in hopes of finishing early. When he doesn’t feel me following him, he turns around and stops, staring me down with his hands in his back pockets, his shoulders slumped in frustration.

Slowly shaking my head, I stand my ground and head towards the next step in the exhibition in silence, disregarding the icy stare from the green boy across the room. I’m not letting him get away with it this time. I’ll enjoy the rest of the tour and make sure to take my time. Might as well enjoy my own company if that’s all I’m gonna have for the rest of the program.

Taglist : @u5dthsduttd

#lando norris fanfic #lando norris x reader #lando norris #formula one #lando norris x y/n #lando x reader #formula one fanfiction #formula one x reader #formula one x y/n #college!au #enemies to lovers

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cheesysoup-arlo · 16 days

Text

Cady’s Cousin pt.2

A/N: sorry this is mostly like “texting” also the relationship/couples I have in here are (karen and gretchen), (cady and regina), later I’ll add (janis and reader) and maybe (aaron and kevin g) idk maybe lol I won’t be tagging the ships since they’re not the main ship I hope y’all liked this lol

(Sunday 8:30pm)

*Cady created a group chat*

Cads 🦁: hey guys I made this group chat so (Y/N) can get to know you guys, you guys can get to know them, and just for fun 👍

???(1): aw Cady that’s so sweet, this is Aaron by the way lol

(Y/N): can everyone send their name please 🙏

???(2): karen 💕

???(3): Beyoncé

???(4): that’s Damian ^, this is janis 👾

Damian🌟: janis you’re no fun this is homophobia

Janis👾: yeah I hate the gays 🙄

karen💕: ??? u hat me 😞

Janis👾: no not you karen just Damian

karen💕: o okie 😽

???(5): the hottest bitch you’ll meet

(Y/N): hi Regina

Cads🦁: Y/N!!!

(Y/N): cads chill I know she’s off limits

Regina👛: aw baby you’re so cute when you’re jealous

Janis👾: barf 🤮

(Y/N): 😭😭😭

(Y/N): wait where’s Gretchen?

karen💕: sleping 😴

Damian🌟: Important question! Y/n are you one of them queers?

(Y/N): I would be offended if you thought I wasn’t

*damian has named group chat “fruit loops”*

Janis👾: I-

(Y/N): oh that’s-

Damian🌟: OK STOP BEING HOMOPHOBIC TO THE GAY BLACK MAN IM A MINORITY HERE

Regina👛: how’s everyone feeling about school tomorrow? I’m kind of excited mostly because the school cheese fries just hit different yk?

Cads🦁: I’m excited too but for classes I picked an extra math class this year

(Y/N): ha nerd 🤓

(Y/N): I’m nervous lol but at least I have you guys

Janis👾: I’m not excited I hate school it keeps me from doing more important things

(Y/N): like what?

Janis👾: sleeping

Damian🌟: I’m excited I decided that I’m gonna take the new senior only theater class which is a little out of my comfort zone but I’ll manage

Aaron🧍‍♂️: I was supposed to be graduated last year so I’m not excited at all

(Y/N): YOU GOT HELD BACK?!?! WHAT?!?!

Aaron🧍‍♂️: yeah I failed English and history so I couldn’t graduate

Cads🦁: it’s ok Aaron now you get to be with us for another year 😊

(Sunday 11:50pm) fruit loops

(Y/N): guys I can’t sleep

Janis👾: same I’ve been lying very still and it’s not working

Damian🌟: janis did you take the melatonin I gave you?

Janis👾: yeah but it’s not working 😔

Damian🌟: welp that’s a you problem then

(Monday 2:30am) fruit loops

(Y/N): do you think I can fit 40 mini marshmallows in my mouth?

Janis👾: oh absolutely

(Y/N): omg ur still awake too?

Janis👾: yeah lol

(Y/N): I just put 35 mini marshmallows in my mouth idk if I can fit more

Janis👾: if you fit all 40 I’ll give you 5 bucks

(Y/N): challenge accepted

(Monday 2:37am) fruit loops

(Y/N): I fit all 40 and almost choked lmao

Janis👾: lmao nice your $5 will be given at school

(Y/N): yippieeee

(Y/N): dude I literally can’t sleep

Janis👾: wanna call? That’s what me and Damian used to do before he got a good sleep schedule lmao

(Y/N): um sure me and my friend back home used to do that too

*incoming call from Janis👾*

“Hi” you whispered suddenly feeling a little more tired with her company even if it was only over the phone “hey” janis said with a small yawn “nice shirt” you say seeing her Lego movie shirt “oh um thanks” she says with a laugh “so what’s up?” “Let’s take turns asking each other questions until we fall asleep” you say with a little yawn “hmm ok favorite color?” She asks you “ooo definitely (your favorite color), how about you?” “Hmm either green or purple” “ooo good choice, hmm hobbies?” “I sing and write a little but I guess art even though I don’t consider it a hobby it’s more of a lifestyle” “art? Can I see some?” “Yeah sure I’ll show you some stuff tomorrow” you both yawn “shit it’s 3 am” janis sighs “fuck” you chuckle sleepy “um I’m getting tired” janis says with a tired laugh “me too” you say starting to close your eyes “good night (y/n)” “good night Janis” you say with a yawn falling asleep as she hangs up

Monday 5:30am

“Pst…(y/n)? You gotta wake up” your cousin said lightly shaking you “ugh five more minutes” you mumbled “no come on up you gotta get ready” she insisted, you got up against your body begging to go back to sleep “good morning sleepy head” Cady said with an enthusiastic smile “cads what time is it?” “5:33” “doesn’t school start at like 8:30?” “No it starts at 8 and I wanted to make sure you had enough time to get ready and have breakfast, breakfast is very important” “uh huh…mm thanks cads” you say with a yawn deciding to get up and look through your clothes “meet me in my room when you’re done getting dressed, ok?” Cady said “um ok?” You said grabbing your favorite jeans and shirt then going to look for your jacket as your cousin left

(Monday 5:40 am) fruit loops

Gretchen🌷: good morning everyone soooo so sorry for not texting yesterday I went to bed early

Regina👛: it’s ok Gretch don’t worry about it

Regina👛: also damn I think Janis and (y/n) our new insomniac duo

(Y/N): unfortunately yes I’m so fucking tired also good morning Gretchen

Aaron🧍‍♂️: why are you guys up so early it’s not even six yet? I literally woke up because of all the buzzing

(Y/N): cads woke me up :(

Regina👛: my skincare and makeup routine take like and hour

Gretchen🌷: I like mornings ☀️

You finished getting ready and headed over to Cady’s room like she asked you to. “What’s up cads?” “Eee (y/n) ok so first of all how are you feeling about your first day” “a little nervous and tired I only got like 2 and a half hours of sleep” “oh goodness (y/n) why didn’t you sleep sooner?”cady says concerned “Because I wasn’t tired?” You half joked. Cady hands you a paper. “That’s a map of the school the way Janis sees it she gave it to me on my first day I feel like it could be helpful for you” “oh um wow thanks cads” you say giving her a half hug. Your aunt knocks on Cady’s open door “hey girls good morning” “good morning mom” Cady says enthusiastically, you yawn “morning” you say with a small smile “I’ve got to head to work but I’m assuming you girls have a ride?” “Yeah Aaron’s gonna pick us up I think?” Cady answers “alright I love you two, be on your best behavior and call me or text me if you need me” your aunt says as she leaves “bye” you and Cady say at the same time. You head to the kitchen and pour yourself a bowl of cereal

(Monday 6:40am) fruit loops

Regina👛: my mom is doing a coffee run what does everyone want?

Damian🌟: iced coffee, oat milk, vanilla

Gretchen🌷: just the usual for me and Karen

Janis👾: iced coffee, oat milk, lavender

(Y/N): um (your coffee order) please

Cads🦁: can you just get me a tea?

Regina👛: yeah of course I’ll get your favorite

Aaron🧍‍♂️: regular coffee, cream and sugar please

Regina👛: ok also who’s picking up who today? I can get Karen and Gretchen as usual

Aaron🧍‍♂️: my mom said I don’t have car privileges this week so I can’t give anyone a ride

Damian🌟: I can get janis for sure but if anyone else needs a ride I can get them too

Cads🦁: can you give (Y/N) and I a ride please we’re ready whenever you are 👍

Damian🌟: yeah I’ll be over in 10 then we’ll go get Janis because I know she’s not ready yet

Janis👾: I would be offended but it’s true

Regina👛: alright meet at our usual spot?

Aaron🧍‍♂️: 👍

Damian🌟: sounds good see y’all soon

#janis ‘imi’ike #regina george #cady heron #gretchen wieners #damian hubbard #karen shetty #aaron samuels #mean girls 2024

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braidlottie · 5 months

Text

snow angel.

pairing: adult!lottieshauna x gn!reader

fluffmas/kinkmas masterlist

summary: your girlfriends surprise with a ski trip to the mountains this year.

tags: lots and LOTS of fluff >_< too much probably, ski trip, lottie spoiling you and shauna, cuddling, lottieshauna Cuddle sandwich!! :33

word count: 1414

lottie is the bold and shauna is the italic

“hi honey, i made breakfast.” lottie smiled at you walking downstairs in your pjs, rubbing your eyes. “smells good.” you yawned. “it’s your favorite too,” shauna petted your head, putting a plate of pancakes in front of you.

the three of you sat in silence at the dinner table, enjoying your food, when shauna broke the silence. “i was thinking,” she took a sip of her orange juice. “we go out this weekend. y’know, like, have a little vacation. just the three of us.” she smiled. you immediately perked up because you have been absolutely begging your girlfriends for a ski trip recently.

“i think that would be just wonderful.” lottie smiled back, wiping away her mouth with a napkin. the older women looked to you now, waiting for you to say something. it was like they were in on something that you didn’t know yet.

“oh, yeah. i would love to go out with you guys.” you muttered, mouth full of pancake. lottie and shauna shared a look before she squealed. “okay, i can’t hide this from you any longer. lottie booked us a trip to a nice ski resort in the mountains upstate.”

“what?!” you shot out of your seat, your cup off juice almost spilling off the table. “we know how much you’ve been wanting to go, darling. and plus, it’s the perfect time of year.”

you were so happy, instantly running to hug lottie and shauna. “when do we leave?”

“tomorrow, so you should get to packing later. we’ll spend three days there, and we’ll be back in time for new years.” lottie grabbed the three of your empty dishes, putting them in the sink. “oh, and i’m taking you to the mall later. we have to get you some appropriate attire for the snow, honey.” new jersey winters were pretty harsh, but you’re going to the mountains. obviously you’re gonna need a coat or two.

***

the three of you left very early the next morning, piling your suitcases into the trunk of lottie’s car. it was still dark out, and you couldn’t stop yawning. you looked down at your phone. 4:36 AM. you sighed. lottie was all about being early.

you sat in the backseat of the SUV with shauna sitting in the passenger and lottie driving. “is everyone excited?” lottie tried to get the party going, turning on the engine and the heat. the car chimed as she pulled out of the driveway and onto the main road. you heard a “yes” from shauna, and you were about to reply as well, but a yawn cut you off.

“why don’t you take a little nap on the way there, darling?” lottie looked at you through the rear view mirror, sleepily rubbing your eyes while looking out the window at all the christmas lights. “how long will it take to get there?”

“four hours, maybe a little less.”

you huffed. “we’ll be there in no time, and it’ll be even faster if you sleep a little, baby.” shauna turned around in her seat to look at you. “and think about it. you’ll need some energy for all the fun things we’re gonna do when we get there.”

finally giving in, you nodded, getting in a comfortable position before closing your eyes.

***

you were gently shaken away by lottie, the car parked in a lot with lots of people and families around in the snow. shauna was already out of the car, getting all the luggage out the trunk. “did you have a nice nap?” she smiled at your sleepy little face, unbuckling your seatbelt as you stretched. she let you get out of the car, helping you into one of your new puffer jackets.

you whined in protest when she zipped you up. “you’ve got to bundle up, angel.” she slipped your beanie over your head, making sure your ears were covered. “but, it’s not even that cold out.”

“hush, hush, go help shauna with the bags.” she hurried, locking the car up.

the resort lottie had booked was beautiful, you weren’t even in your room yet and everything just felt so cozy. before you knew it, lottie checked in with the woman at the front desk and she gave her your room key. it only took a short elevator ride to get to the third floor where your room was. shauna slid the card in and the light turned green, letting you open the door to come inside.

there was a huge flatscreen tv on the wall, a fireplace right below it. to the left of it was a glass patio door, that led onto a balcony. the view was absolutely breathtaking, it was like something out of a movie. there was a little kitchen and even a little mini bar. you walked into the bedroom, finding a little basket on the bed with refreshments and snacks and a note from the restore saying “Welcome!” in cursive with yours, lottie’s, and shauna’s last names. you swore the bathroom was three times bigger than yours at home, the walk-in shower taking up half the room.

“how much did all of this cost?” shauna exclaimed, already reading off the mini bar’s menu. “let’s not worry about that honey, we’ve got ski lessons to be at. in thirty minutes!” she looked at her watch with wide eyes. you and shauna just giggled to yourselves, watching her scramble around the room for her things.

***

lottie rented skis and helmets for all of you, and a pair of snow goggles that she caught you staring at and couldn’t let you go without them. the instructor was very nice, teaching you how to stop and slow down. after a good hour and a half or so of lessons, it was time for your first big hill.

you looked out the window of the ski lift, admiring the snowy mountains. you were too excited, lottie and shauna smiling lovingly at you as you babbled on and on about the snow. it was so special that your first time seeing snow was with them.

the instructor only let the three of you go one at a time. you took it like a champ, lottie losing her balance and taking a few stumbles, and shauna almost ran full on into a tree. but they surprisingly left the ski track unscathed, lottie giggling uncontrollably at shauna’s attempt.

you spent the rest of the day doing other activities, like enjoying the hot tub, going to gift shops, and even going on snowmobile rides off track. lottie noticed how much you loved the rented goggles that she decided to buy you your own pair. yes, they were $70 goggles, but your happiness was more valuable to her.

the night ended with dinner in a very decorative restaurant, the inside felt like you were eating in a cabin. you sat in a booth with your girlfriends, getting a a wonderful view of the ski tracks, watching people trick off the hills and hop back on the lift.

when you got back to your room, it was nearing 10pm, and you were so exhausted from everything you did today. but you still wanted to sit by the window and watch the snow fall. it was like you were in a trance, cherishing every little snowflake that blew in the wind. you heard your girlfriends muttering something behind you in bed, how adorable your reaction was. you looked back at them and smiled, eventually getting up to join them.

“did you have fun today, baby?” lottie asked, getting you tucked under the covers with them. you laid sandwiched in the middle, your head resting on shauna’s chest as you nodded and yawned.

“goodness, honey, if i had a nickel for every single time you’ve yawned today, i’d be rich.” shauna teased, and lottie chuckled in reply. you just hummed, turning to face lottie now, getting a kiss on the nose from her. “you’re so warm. you’re like a little oven.” she scooted closer, wrapping her arms around you and shauna. “we might not even need the fireplace tonight.”

you were so content and warm, the soft, hushed voices of your girlfriends lulling you to sleep. “thank you so much for this. love you.” you slurred, pretty much out of it. “we love you too, angel. get some rest, okay?” lottie smiled, soothing you to sleep by rubbing your cheek. you knocked out quick, your girlfriends admiring your peaceful state before falling asleep themselves.

#yellowjackets #yellowjackets x reader #lottie x shauna #adult lottie #adult shauna #lottieshauna x reader #lottie shauna x reader #lottieshauna #lottie matthews x reader #lottie matthews #shauna shipman #shauna shipman x reader #shauna sadecki #shauna sadecki x reader #shauna yellowjackets #lottie yellowjackets #lottie matthews fluff #shauna shipman fluff #finalgirlmeeks fluffmas/kinkmas ‘23!

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anangelwhodidntfall · 1 year

Text

Fatherhood: Tsu'tey

Avatar Masterlist

word count: 900

description: Your daughter can’t handle the idea of her dad being away fro almost a week leaving your mate in a tough spot, but luckily you are always there to help him.

It all felt like a dream to Tsu'tey sometimes, waking up to you next to him, or the fact that he got his other wish in this world to be a father to three beautiful children Akätxo the firstborn son who wanted to be like his father, Eyeyätxzi the second and rebellious son, and Äsnawlìawng, the youngest and his first daughter who had him absolutely wrapped around her finger.

Tsu'tey was getting ready for a mission in the morning, where he was helping train the new warriors including Akätxo and your daughter was absolutely upset about him leaving since this was the first time he has left since she was born.

"No daddy, you can't go." She said clinging to him as she softly cried breaking your heart.

"Oh, Äsna." You said looking at her as your mate felt conflicted about what to do, he knew that he had to help train the new warriors but he didn't want to leave his baby girl in tears.

Äsna was a total daddy's girl, they were always together it didn't matter if Tsu'tey was training or whatnot she was always with him. Sure he had gone on missions where he was gone for a few hours but never on trips that were a few days or a week, so she didn't know how to handle the idea of him being gone for that long.

"It's alright angel, I'm not going anywhere." He said hugging her and placing a kiss on her forehead as her cries died down.

"Mom is Äsna gonna be okay?" Akätxo asked concerned about his little sister.

"Yeah baby, she will. She's just having a hard time with your dad leaving tomorrow." You said to him.

"Are you excited for tomorrow?" You asked him.

"Yeah I am, I can't believe that I finally get to go on one even if it is just helping carry weapons with Neteyam." He said making you laugh.

"Your gonna do great my son." You said to him.

"Thank you again mom for letting me go." He said hugging you as you pressed a kiss to his forehead.

A little bit later you went to check on Tsu'tey and Äsna, you found her sound asleep next to him in your bed making you smile. He noticed you by the door and it brought a smile to his face that mirrored the wore you at the sight of them.

"She okay?" You asked him.

"Yeah, she just wore herself out. I'm conflicted on what to do because I did promise Akätxo that he could go but I don't want to leave her." He said.

"Well Akätxo could still go you know Jake and Tarsem wouldn't let anything happen to him and you could stay with us if you want, I'm sure they would understand." You said to him.

"I know I just don't want to let anyone down." He said sighing as you walked over to him and wrapped your arms around him.

"My love your not letting anyone down if you stay or if you go. You are an amazing father, warrior, and mate and it's okay to put yourself first sometimes." You said to him feeling him squeeze you.

"Thank you ma y/n, I don't know what I did to deserve you." He said pressing a kiss to your lips.

"Everything. Now go talk to Jake, so we can talk to Akätxo and her about the plan, okay?" You said as he nodded softly climbing off of the bed and going to find Jake.

Tsu'tey found Jake and explained the situation who more than understood what he was going through, and told him that they would keep an eye on Akätxo so that he could still tag along and Tsu could stay home with his baby girl.

"You were right as always, ma y/n." He said wrapping his arms around you.

"Usually am, funny how that works. Do you wanna tell them now or in the morning?" You asked turning and facing him.

"Let's tell them now, I can't bear to see her tears again." He said making your heart swell at how close they were.

"Softie." You said nudging him as he called the kids into the main room so he could update them on what was happening.

"Okay guys, I spoke with Jake and I will not be going on the mission tomorrow morning but instead Akätxo you will be going with Jake and his son Neteyam who will watch over you so that I could be here with your sister...I'm so sorry son, I wanted to be there with you for your first trip." Your mate said.

"It's alright dad, I understand, and I mean it's not technically my first hunting trip I'm just carrying weapons so you still have time to come on my first one, but thank you for letting me go." He said hugging Tsu'tey making you smile at his words.

"Thank you, son, that means a lot coming from you and I can't wait to hear all about it." He said making you smile.

"So you're staying daddy?" Your daughter asked with a big smile on her face.

"Yes, I am going to be here with you my princess, my knuckleheaded son, and my beautiful mate." He said as everyone gathered into a big group hug.

#tsu'tey x reader #tsu'tey fluff #tsu'tey avatar #tsu'tey imagines #tsu’tey te rangloa ateyitan #tsu'tey x you

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twstfanblog · 6 months

Text

*~250 Followers Fic~*

A/N: Ignore me taking so long to get this out. I love how the fall gives me hit after hit and they only get worse in the winter XD. But I've got plenty of WIPs in the pot to work with. Enjoy this fic though!

Edit: Had to redo some tags. A lot of them got deleted somehow

Warnings: They/She OC, minor vomiting scene.

Main Pairings: Polygamous OC dating 3 people- YuuxMalleus, YuuxAzul, YuuxAzul, Alluded to Trey/Jade, Leona/Ruggie

A series of videos were posted to all of Cater’s socials, his Magicam, his Twstr, and even his Thimble over the course of a single day. The increase in activity drew in his followers and peaking curiosity. The first video opened with Yuu, smiling in a nice blazer with the NRC logo over the right breast.

“Hello to the audience of Cay-Cay-Cutie! I am sure you recognize me from my cryptid appearances in the background of Cater’s videos, but I’ll introduce myself anyway. I’m Yuu and I’m stealing Cater’s socials to record and post Night Raven College’s first annual Spice Endurance Competition!”

They walk to the center of the mirror chamber, gesturing to the seven mirrors, "Each dorm will be taking part in this little contest. Points will be given for every person who finishes the challenge. We're looking for clean bowls!"

She steps to the side, allowing Grim to float into view. The cat monster smiled smugly as he sported a new grand bowtie with an emblem of NRC in the center, “Join me and my co-host, Grim, in seeing how each dorm manages the challenge! Who will win? Who will lose? Who’s gonna CRY!? Find out in the next series of videos!”

~*~*~*~*~*~

The first video after the introduction simply had the four suits of a card deck and a rose as the title. Opening it showed Yuu, smiling as she walked through a lush rose garden with a stylized stamp of 'Heartslabyul' in the corner, “Welcome back, and thanks for clicking the video! I’m live on the scene at the Heartslabyul dorm, home of the great Cay-Cay himself.”

The camera swings around, showing the various dorm members waiting patiently at the tables for the ghosts to bring out the spicy dishes. At the main table, sitting beside Riddle was Cater. Catching Yuu finally arriving, he smiled and waved, “Yuu-Chan~! Over here sweetie, bring my fans!”

“Yeah, yeah We’re coming…” Grim mutters under his breath, missing Yuu briefly showing his pouting face to the camera before it moves back to Cater and the others.

“It’s Cay-Cay and crew! Lined up and ready for the Spice Endurance Challenge!” Cater puts on his persona, smiling and winking at the camera with a number of cute gestures and poses.

Trey smiles softly from his place on Riddle’s other side, muttering in good nature, “Do we not get names?”

Yuu instantly moves the camera away from Cater’s display, almost shoving it into Trey’s surprised face, “Why is that baking prodigy, Trey Clover, competing? Will such a handsome, talented, connected, single, man take home a victory for his dorm?”

The green-haired junior turned his face away from the camera, pulling his hat over his eyes trying to hide his blushing expression, “Stop…”

Deuce, the caring freshman he was, saw how embarrassed Trey was. He leaned on the table, nearly laying on it in an effort to shield Trey from view, “I’m Deuce Spade! I’m also competing to show how great Heartslabyul is!” After a few moments, his determined expression softens to a smile, waving briefly to the camera, “Hi mom! If you’re watching. I don’t know if you’re watching…Wait, did I tell my mom about Diamond-Senpai’s social media…medias?”

“Ok, enough of that.” Ace’s hand shoves Deuce’s head out of the way, pushing the other freshman directly onto the table to take up the space. With a cocky smirk, he pointed at himself with a thumb, “I’m Ace Trappola! And I’m gonna win this stupid little contest thought up by old Ramshackle, over here.”

“Both of you get off the table.”

Ace and Deuce scramble off the table, both of them trying to put space between them and their annoyed housewarden. Yuu angles the camera over, showing Riddle’s angered glare at the two freshmen. Seeing he was being filmed, he coughed into his fist, calming his temper, “Hello. I am Riddle Rosehearts, the current house-warden of Heartslabyul. I’m looking forward to this new school event.”

“Riddle Rosehearts, everyone. And, no, the stick has yet to be found in his ass.”

“Excuse you-”

Grim groaned, floating into view to hide Riddle’s reddening face, “Can we start already? I wanna eat grub, not re-meet all these losers…”

Cater forcibly moved the camera to view him again, a small pout on his face. Seeing the focus back on him, he smiled, “Now listen up cuties! Yuu-Chan and Grim-Chan will be back after we eat. Not gonna be that kinda content channel, sorry folks.”

Yuu poked their head from the bottom of the screen, smiling at the camera, “I see the ghosts bringing out the noods! Round one of the Spice Endurance Challenge, start!” Their expression blanks for a moment, “Oh, hang on…”

They take the camera back, pointing it toward Riddle and making the motion of signing the cross at him. Reaching forward and dipping their fingers into his cup of tea before flicking the liquid at him, “Ok, now we can start!”

Riddle looked at himself in confusion in the background, seeing the spots of tea on his uniform, “What did you just do?”

~*~*~*~*~*~

The video has a brief ad roll, coming back to Yuu struggling to not laugh, “Welcome back! Let’s see how they did!”

The camera moves in a sweep of the garden, showing a number of Heartslabyul students guzzling down their tea or eating heaping spoonfuls of whipped cream that had made their way to the tables. At the main table, Cater sat in his chair working on a second bowl of spicy noodles, even though it was clear the dish was too spicy for him to handle. Beside him was Riddle face down on the table, unmoving. Trey was nowhere in sight, but Ace and Deuce were both in the fountain, heads dunked under the water. Grim was the only other person at the table, slurping up Ace and Deuce’s unfinished bowls.

Yuu zoomed in on Grim’s happy face, “Be careful, Grim, you don’t wanna get spicy in your eyes.”

At Grim’s happy chirp, Yuu moved away to focus on Cater’s flushed face, “And, just as I’m sure he was, Cater has taken to the challenge with grace and style!”

Cater simply flashed a peace sign, smiling as he covered his mouth to finish off Riddle’s bowl. Chewing, he pointed toward Riddle.

“Oh right.” Yuu moves closer to Riddle, a hand moving into frame to press against the prone redhead’s neck, checking his pulse, “...Ok, he’s still alive, where’s Trey?”

“I’m back! Is he still out?” Trey rushed into the area, carrying two massive bowls of whipped cream. Placing them on the table, he lifted Riddle’s head haphazardly by the hair. The redhead was clearly out of it with his face coated in sweat and completely red with his mouth hanging open. Instead of trying to feed the chilled topping to Riddle, Trey simply put him face down into the first bowl, ignoring the hissing sound and steam escaping from the sides.

Turning around Yuu yelled toward Ace and Deuce, “Aye! Trey’s back! Stop drinking the fountain water!” They mutter under their breath, “You’re gonna get a fucking infection…”

Grim floated beside Yuu, slurping up the last of his noodles as he faced the camera, “And that’s Heartslabyul! My henchmen will be tallying up the losers left standing and then we’ll move on to the next dorm!”

“That’s right, Grim! At least we have one clear winner! Cater, say bye-bye!”

Cater settled beside Yuu, waving and winking at the camera, “Bye-bye chat! All your love helped me through this challenge so remember to like and follow to keep up with the other videos! #Hotey-Ate-Spicy #Spice-Endurance-Challenge #Not-Click-Bait!”

“On to the next dorm!”

Grim floated over Riddle, his face slowly morphing into a grimace of worry, “Is he breathing?”

“...”

Yuu looked over, seeing Trey trying to stop Ace and Deuce from fighting over the bowl of whipped cream, “Hey, Trey…Riddle might need medical attention.”

“Of course he does…”

~*~*~*~*~*~

The next video had a series of emojis being A sunset, a lion, a wolf, and oddly enough a donut. The video starts with a simple text of 'Savanaclaw' that was animated to rip away. Yuu now stood in a new location with a number of rowdy students in the background.

“Secondary location~! We’re here in Savanaclaw, waiting in prep for the second round to start.”

“Queenie’s dorm really didn’t last long did they?” The camera cuts to the voice, Leona lazing in a lounge chair as he smugly smiles. The dorm leader a picture of calm and cool while the dorm continued in excited chaos around them.

“You know damn well, Riddle is getting milk injected into his bloodstream right now. Introduce yourself and pay your respects, you ass.”

The beastman simply growls, rolling his eyes, “If people don’t know who I am, then they aren’t worth the air to say my name.’ Jack’s torso manages to walk into view, arms crossed as he was clearly scolding his house-warden, “Senpai, you should introduce yourself, It’s only polite if you’re being interviewed.”

Leona huffs, locking eyes with Yuu before he gestures upward. The camera moves, showing Jack’s shocked face before his ears pin back in nervousness.

“Uh…”

“Go on runt, introduce yourself.” Leona laughs from off-screen, “It’s only polite after all.”

Jack seemed to be fighting himself, before sighing, “I’m Jack Howl…The contest sounded interesting so I wanted to test myself…”

Yuu quickly turned the camera toward themselves, smiling as they stated, “He has a bet with our firstie squad who could survive the challenge the longest.” They turn the camera back just in time to catch Jack’s embarrassed flush, the wolf beastman turning around to hide his face.

“Don’t say that! Like I would do something like this over such a stupid bet!”

Grim snickers, floating up beside Jack, “If it helps, Ace and Deuce couldn’t even finish their bowls.”

“Really?” Jack turns around, ears perked and tail wagging in mild excitement. But seeing Yuu was still filming him, he scoffed and turned back around, stomping away from them.

Yuu giggles, filming Grim floating in the air as he cackles at Jack’s reaction before they catch someone walking in the background.

“Excuse me, good sir, the fuck?”

Ruggie’s ears twitch, turning around with an uneasy-going grin. In his arms, he carried a number of large empty food containers, “Hey there buddy of mine. What ya need? I’m a little busy.”

“The fuck are you doing with a sales lady’s worth of Tupperware?”

Lifting the containers in his arms, Ruggie simply shrugged, “What? There’s probably gonna be leftovers. I’m just being responsible, can’t have perfectly good food going to waste.”

“Rug-ward, I’m begging you to have respect for yourself. Don’t eat other’s scraps.”

“Free food is free food, prefect, don’t know what to tell ya.”

Yuu turns the camera back to their face, an annoyed scowl clear, "That was Rug-ward Bucci the fifth, everyone. Taking self-respect to new lows."

"Ey!"

"Oi, when is this starting? I'm gonna leave if this takes any longer."

The camera moves back to Leona's lounging figure, "Leona." Yuu waited until the beastman was looking toward them, "Shut up."

The view just barely pulled away as Leona’s hand springs up, his middle finger held out proudly. Yuu blew the camera a kiss, winking coyly, “Leona Kingscholar. Sorry to the masses, he’s single.”

Off-screen, Ruggie shouts out in mild annoyance, “No, he’s not!”

“O-oh, fuck!” Yuu barely managed to stop her choking laugh, looking to the side in surprise. As Yuu giggled, Grim popped into view, a big grin on his face.

“Food’s here! Turn the camera off!”

“Grim! Hold on!” Yuu wrestles the camera from Grim’s paws, smiling while keeping Grim at a distance, “Welp, round two is about to start! Let’s wish our Savanaclaw contestants luck! Also, fuck Leona Kingscholar, that is all.” “Fuck off, prefect!”

~*~*~*~*~*~

After the ads, the video started again. Yuu was now shown under a table, the sounds of people yelling heard from under the cloth, “Yeah, I don’t know what I was expecting. The second someone started winning, everyone started fighting and that turned into a food fight. Which, if you’ve ever rubbed your eyes after cutting peppers, is a horrible idea…”

Hearing the sounds of the brawl ending, Yuu crawled out from under the table and showed the area. Broken plates and spilled noodles were everywhere, some Savanaclaw members were seen on the ground curled in on themselves as they squirmed in pain, no doubt in agony from stray spice sauce in their eyes.

Jack was seen, openly sweating with his ears pinned back, tongue out as he panted. His bowl was death-gripped in his hands, empty and somehow not shattered into pieces from Jack’s strength. His distressed expression morphs into a stern glare, shoving his bowl forward to show that it was empty.

Yuu’s gave a thumbs up, “Good job, Jack! Go take a cold shower, you are literally coated in sweat. It’s gross.”

They turn away just as Jack lets out a tired groan, head tipping back in a mock howl of agony. Instead, the camera catches Ruggie walking through the set-up tables. The hyena beastman dumped half-empty bowls into his waiting Tupperware containers. The 2nd year even taking time to slurp up a few stray noodles.

“Ruginald! My god! Stop it!”

He shrugged, glaring over to Yuu and making sure to harshly tip a bowl into a container, “Don’t you scold me! I don’t have to pay for lunch or dinner for like two weeks with all this!”

“Did you even compete!?”

Ruggie simply waved them away, once he knew there was no cash prize, the hyena had no reason to actually compete in the hellish contest. But, having access to free food was always good in his book.

Yuu groans, scanning the crowd before finally spotting the house-warden. Leona was back in his lounge chair, stretched out and eyes closed as contained chaos rang out around him. Yuu stood over him with the camera in his face, waiting for the 3rd year to acknowledge their presence.

Groaning, Leona cracked an eye open, “What…?”

“Your results, your royal highness.”

He clicks his tongue, reaching under his chair and pulling out an empty bowl.

“...Mother fucker, did you cheat!?”

Leona only smirked, closing his eye and putting the completely clean bowl back under his chair, “You stated we needed to show a cleared bowl to get the win. Maybe I liked it so much I licked it clean.”

Yuu reached over, managing to bypass Leona’s batting tail to flick the beastman on the ear, “Dirty fucking cheater. A point for you, I guess. Rather you just cheat instead of actually causing a riot like last time.”

Their scolding didn’t dampen Leona’s smirk. He only lifted his hand to show his middle finger to the camera.

~*~*~*~*~*~

The third post was titled with a coral branch, bubbles, an octopus, and weirdly enough, two eel emojis. The video opened seemingly underwater, fish swimming leisurely in the tinted lighting as cursive letters spell out 'Octavinelle' before fading. Smooth jazz played throughout the area, the camera movements suddenly smoother and showcasing the classy decor of the room.

The camera sweeps over other dorm members, sitting poised and ready in suits before the camera is brought over to a two-seated table. Azul sat across the table from Yuu, smiling and tilting his head in greeting while Yuu started speaking.

“Welcome back! I’m here in the opulent Mostro Lounge, with self-made man, Azul Ashengrotto. The owner of said lounge has been oh so kind as to allow us to host in his establishment during prime operation hours.”

Azul smiled, showing his teeth as he turned to Yuu, placing a hand over theirs, “Yes! But, as the house-warden of the house of benevolence, it was only right for me to allow my dear pearl to use my venue for their little contest.” He closes his eyes, bringing Yuu's hand to kiss their knuckles gently.

Yuu nods at Azul’s speech, though their eyes clearly state Azul was already toeing some kind of line with his teasing, “Well said, Azul. But that’s right folks! Our third location is under the sea in the Octavinelle dorm. Maybe the cool waters will ease the fiery spice challenge.”

“But, if it does prove too much,” Azul leans off to the side for a moment, grabbing a glass from a tray from an off-screen Floyd, “Try our newest drink to cool down. Ocean Lemon-Maid. Only at the Mostro Lounge for this week to celebrate Night Raven College’s first annual Spice Endurance Challenge.”

Yuu keeps smiling but strains to whisper, “Are you really using this to fucking advertise that damn drink…”

Azul smiles back at Yuu, fully turning to offer them the blue ombre drink, “Well, how about a free sample? Only for you though, my dear.”

“What, I can’t try it!?” Grim’s voice calls out from somewhere off-camera.

“No.” Azul didn’t even turn his head, eyes only flickering toward the camera in a brief annoyed glance.

Yuu leans closer to Azul, whispering coyly in his ear, “Let him have some.”

Azul visibly shivers on screen, placing the drink down before turning toward the camera with a mildly flushed face, “Cut the recording.” Without waiting for an affirmative, he turned back to Yuu, “No, I’m not letting him have any. You know Grim can’t hold a glass for more than 10 seconds.”

“Pwease~? Look at him, he’s wasting away!” Yuu rests their head against Azul’s shoulder, their arm reaching behind him to twirl his long strand of hair.

The two of them engage in a near-silent conversation, Yuu clearly sneaking in a few flirtatious comments if Azul’s flustered expression was anything to note.

Floyd groans, stepping into frame to cross his arms at the two of them, “Are you guys really gonna sit here and be gross until we start? You could have done this in Azul’s office and I wouldn’t have had to wear this dumb tie!”

Jade speaks from behind the camera, “Floyd, you’re supposed to wear your tie anyway. Just think of it as a favor Azul will have to owe you later.”

“I didn’t agree to that.”

“Yay! Azul, you’ll owe me a big favor later, okay?”

“I didn’t agree to that!?”

“Ah~! Babe, how benevolent of you.” Yuu cups Azul’s opposite cheek, pulling him closer to press a kiss to the cheek closest to them. Pulling away and smiling at the blueish blush creeping on his face, “What a kind and giving boyfriend I have. Makes me feel so lucky to be with you~.”

Azul only pushed his glasses up, a smile on his face while he tried to get his hearts under control, “Well…It only makes sense! I am truly the most generous person you know, my pearl. As your lover, it is a goal to ensure you have all your heart desires.”

“I know. Grim, you can try the drink.”

“Wha-” “YEAH!” Grim swoops into view, grabbing the glass cup with both of his paws before zipping away and cackling.

A few moments pass by before Azul turns to Yuu with an annoyed glare, “Really?”

“I’ll make sure to pay you back if he breaks the glass.”

Azul rolls his eyes, scoffing under his breath, “With what money?”

“I’ll pay you back the way we both like.”

The blue blush returns full force once Azul realizes just what Yuu was offering him.

Jade speaks up again, angling the camera slightly downward, “I’m not sure if Cater-San can use this in his video.”

“...” Azul snaps over to Jade, surprised expression changing into a glare, “Are you still filming!?”

The sound of glass breaking off-screen makes Azul groan before he stands, stomping off toward an apologizing Grim.

Yuu smiles, waving at the camera as Floyd shoves his face into their space. His sharp teeth on display as he smiles with his arms wrapped around Yuu’s shoulders. From the background, they could hear Azul scolding Grim and listing off a number of chores the cat monster would be forced to do just to make up for breaking a single glass. Jade soon angles the camera to allow himself to be in frame with his brother and Yuu.

"Guess that leaves me with these two! Jade and Floyd Leech. And if you think you know their family, no you don't."

“The ghosts shall be here soon.” Jade smiles, his own sharp teeth just barely shown, “Round Three will begin shortly.”

“Thank you for the transition point, Jade. Join us in a few moments to see if Octavinelle will sink or swim!”

“Hehehehe, Shrimpy’s got puns!”

~*~*~*~*~*~

“As you can see, things did not go well.” Yuu held the camera up, a hand patting Azul’s back. The Octo-Mer was hunched over, coughing wildly as he struggled, “At the very least no one’s-Op, spoke too soon. Jade’s on the floor…”

The camera moves, showing Jade face down on the ground. Floyd was shown pacing around the background rubbing at his own tongue with a cloth. In a furious motion, the Eel-Mer whining about the burning. The other Octavinelle students were in various states of distress, most of them all with the bright blue drink on their tables. Trey could also be seen in the background, giving out small baggies of what seemed to be whipped cream to those without the drink.

Yuu turns the camera back to their face, just in time for Azul to brace himself against their side, his other hand clutching onto a glass of lemonade.

“Remember! Ocean Lemon-Maid to cool your burning taste buds! Only at Mostro Lounge for a limited time!” With that, he turned away, chugging the iced juice until the glass was empty. Yuu watched him slam the glass on the table, jumping at the loud clank fearing it would break from the impact.

Azul takes a gasping breath and then looks at the glass still in his grasp, “That actually worked…?”

“Motherfu-I told you lemonade helps with spicy food, you asshole!”

“You tell me…a lot of things, my pearl.” Azul looks at the camera with a strained smile, knowing he had basically admitted to possibly false advertisement plus underestimating his beloved date-mate, “I’m simply pleasantly surprised that it was just as delicious and effective as you said it would be!”

Yuu huffs, walking away as Azul tries to call out to them, “Yeah, yeah. You’re lucky, you’re so cute, you sunshine punk.” Walking over to Trey, Yuu tugged at his sleeve, “Trey, is everybody okay at Heartslabyul?”

“Yeah.” Trey smiles, waving to the camera before focusing on Yuu, “Everyone’s calmed down or are resting, so I decided to make some more whipped cream and bring it to the other dorms to help out.”

Jade popped up, face beet red and slightly sweaty. He rested his cheek against his palm, leaning on his elbow on the floor, “Oh Trey-San, so dependable as always…”

“Hello, Jade.” Trey held out a baggy of whipped cream, smiling at Jade trying to appear in his normal state of suave. He instead jumped when Floyd ripped the baggie from his hands, shoving the plastic and all into his mouth, “F-Floyd! The plastic-!”

Jade simply waved off Trey’s worry, not even flinching as his brother tore apart the baggie and nearly ate the plastic, “It’s fine, he’s eaten worse.”

~*~*~*~*~*~

The next video was titled with a snake, a genie lamp, and a sun emoji. Opening from a bird’s eye view of the massive dorm as 'Scarabia' faded into frame only to be blown away as if it was made of sand. The camera flew around the area, showcasing the ornate landscaping then quickly landed beside a waiting Yuu and Grim, Kalim’s voice coming from behind the lens.

“Was that good? Using the carpet to get the whole dorm in shot was such a good idea, Jamil!”

Jamil walked past the frame, glancing over as he carried a tray of precut meats and vegetables to a hotpot set up away from the other tables. He set the tray on the table, walking over to slip an arm around Yuu's waist and pressing a kiss on their cheek before answering Kalim. “It was a simple idea. No need for the praise-"

Yuu reaches up, squishing Jamil’s cheeks in a single hand, smiling at the annoyed glance he gives them, "Shut up and take the compliment, you beautiful bastard."

Jamil keeps eye contact, clicking his tongue before pulling his face away. He doesn't stay away for long, tilting his head to rest against Yuu's, "Anyway. Here, Kalim. Since you can't participate, I took the liberty of making you a hotpot selection. The oil should be up to temp by now…"

Grim had floated over, mildly grappling with the house-warden before he had the camera in his paws telling them they needed to introduce themselves. Kalim's smiling face came into view, hands braced on his hips as he nearly shouted out, "I'm Kalim al Asim! And I'm super excited to see what the ghosts made! Jamil cooks for all of us all the time and he has a way better spice tolerance than most people. We're used to eating spicy food in Scarabia!"

The camera quickly turns to Jamil, the dark-eyed student raising an eyebrow before nodding his head, "Jamil Viper, vice warden of Scarabia." Jamil let a small smirk form on his face, pulling Yuu closer to speak to them directly, "This will be a very fun 'challenge', spicy food is basically a daily part of life in the Scalding Sands. Though…it'll be nice to be cooked for by someone else for once…"

Kalim frowned, turning to pout at Jamil, "Hey! I cooked just last week!"

"Kalim, I'm glad you're trying to learn to feed yourself, but a bag of warmed-up trail mix with half-melted cheese is not an actual meal."

The house-warden looks away, mumbling under his breath with a pout, "I'm proud of my girl dinners…"

"Yeah…about that." Yuu smiles sheepishly, hip bumping against Jamil’s teasingly, "I was pretty sure you guys would breeze through this challenge so~...I called in help from a guest chef!"

"...Guest chef…?"

Kalim perks up, waving to someone off-screen in the distance, "Lilia!? What are you doing here!?"

Jamil felt an intense sense of dread seeing the Diasomnia student for some reason, "What?"

Yuu grabs the camera, smiling wide as they bring it closer, "Time to put those scalding sands to the test! Who will win? Scarabia or Fae-powered spicy home cooking! Find out after the ads!"

~*~*~*~*~*~

Yuu's face was in frame as the video came back, "Ok, in hindsight, this could count as a war crime and I am very sorry."

All around, the Scarabia students were in deep distress. Many of them simply laying prone on the ground or face down on the tables. The only ones who still seemed able-bodied were the ones in front of untouched bowls of black and purple-tinted masses of "noodles". Lilia could be seen floating over the crowd, a pout on his face as he surveyed the students.

"Hmmm…maybe the milk I used for the sauce had gone bad? I don't know why all of you got so sick…"

The camera angles over to Kalim, the dorm leader looking at his classmates with a confused yet panicked expression, "I should…call someone, right?"

"Yeah…yeah, call the nurse…or a hazmat team, either or. Jamil…Jamil, baby, you ok?"

Jamil stood braced against a wall with an almost clawing grasp, an empty bowl marked with blacked sludge clutched in his other hand. The second year panted in a clearly distressed pattern, body slicked with sweat and shaking.

"...Babe, you did not have to actually finish the bowl. You would have gotten the win just from tasting it…"

The glare Jamil throws over his shoulder would have been vicious if it didn't look like an angry toddler on the verge of tears. Only to have his face pale and snap back toward the wall, a loud retching sound being heard before Yuu moved the camera away and set it on a table.

"OH! Okay, good God. Alright. Hold on, babe, I'm coming. Grim, go get Trey from Octavinelle!"

Yuu rushes over, the vomiting sounds only getting worse, Grim being seen floating in the opposite direction with a grossed out face before the video ends.

~*~*~*~*~*~

The next video had the emoji title of a crown, a bullseye, an apple, and a sparkle. The opening was the highest quality yet, showcasing the grand design of the dorm and even wilderness shots. Smooth transitions only showing this was a prepared film roll meant to only present the best the dorm had to offer. The opening ends with elegant lettering titled 'Pomefiore' before the image fades into Vil and Yuu sitting on a loveseat in the Pomefiore lounge.

"Welcome back, cuties. I'm here with Vil Shoenheit in the Pomefiore lounge for the next part of the Spice Endurance Challenge-"

"Why is this still going?"

"Hm?" Yuu blinks, tilting their head in false confusion while Vil looks at them with crossed arms, "...It's still going because we aren't done, Vil."

"You subjected all of Scarabia to what could only be classified as Chemical Warfare. That's plenty of reason to end this nonsensical little "event" you managed to strong-arm Crowley into approving."

"You know Vil, just because you can't eat seasoning past waving a salt shaker at your food, doesn't mean other people don't like it."

"Jamil has food poisoning, Yuu."

"He's fine."

"80% of Scarbia is in the infirmary."

"They're. Fiiiiiine…"

Vil sighed, rolling his eyes and flicking open a pocket mirror. As he checked over his lipstick, he muttered, "Just finish your mediocre intro. Neither you nor Cater have the funds to book me on film for long."

"Primadonna Bitch- anyway, Cuties! Vil here is actually very knowledgeable about food science and is kind enough to give us a crash course in the health benefits and downfalls of a spice-heavy diet.

" It's my pleasure, Yuu." Vil snaps the mirror closed, placing it in his sleeve with a fluid motion before looking toward the camera, "The compound found inside spicy foods known as "Capcaisin" has been shown in moderate amounts to increase metabolism, improve digestive health, and even extend lifespans in some cases. But the true downfall comes from excessive consumption of it. Leading to a number of issues involving extreme irritation of tissue both internal and external. It's also been shown to increase bad cholesterol in cases."

Vil turns to Yuu, smiling sweetly as he tilts his head in a clearly practiced movement, "Which is why I feel this challenge is not only foolish but dangerous for my dorm."

Yuu smiles back, copying Vil's head tilt in a mocking over-performed mirroring, " Don't worry Vil. One day you'll be able to handle spicy food like Salsa or Wheat Bread."

The dorm head looked one second away from poisoning his co-host, only to be interrupted by the voice behind the camera.

"Ah~! I'm so excited to see the level of spiciness we will be graced with today! It's always a pleasant treat to enjoy a food that has the power to physically impact the body."

"Oh, you like spicy food Rook?" Yuu had stood from the couch, leaving behind a calmed Vil, and grabbed the camera. Turning it around to show the bob-haired student, "May I introduce the hunter of beauty and love, Rook Hunt."

Rook smiled, closing his eyes as he gave a polite half bow, "Bonjour beautés! And to answer mon vieille amor, I indulge in spicy food if it is the culture of the area my family visits on our yearly vacation. The smell, the taste, the visuals! Spicy food is another form of beauty that I adore exploring. This challenge will be a test of mon skills!"

"Well, I'm glad someone," the camera swings back quickly, just barely showing Vil in focus before moving back to Rook's smiling face, "is excited for my fun, wholesome challenge!"

Vil speaks up from behind the camera, "Scarabia. Infirmary. Chemical Warfare."

The sound of the door clicking open pulls their attention to it. The camera focuses on a startled Epel, the first year not expecting to walk into being filmed. He tried to hide it, sheepishly brushing his hair with his fingers as he cleared his throat.

"The dining room is ready. Everyone who was approved to compete is waiting to start." He smiled gently at the camera, his practiced persona coming across as calm and pleasant.

Rook exclaims off-camera, moving toward the door and starting to wax poetic about the challenge. Holding the door open for Vil to walk through, the house-warden going to look over the event and make sure his dormmates weren't slacking in their table manners.

Once the two third years were out of the room, Yuu turned the camera toward Epel, “The myth, the legend. Epel Felmier, anything to say to the masses about your upcoming challenge?”

Epel walks beside them, looking in front of them. After checking that Vil and Rook weren’t looking at them, he turned to the camera. His serene expression changed to a wicked almost cocky smirk, the hint of a southern twang coming into his voice, “Those other losers are goin' fuckin' down-”

“Epel!”

The lavender-haired first-year snaps back into a “proper” look, “I didn’t do noth-ahem- I haven’t done anything!” He rushes forward, running to catch up with his upperclassmen.

Yuu moves the camera to their face, sticking out their tongue and winking before the video cuts.

~*~*~*~*~*~

The video comes back from the ad roll. Yuu is seen standing beside Vil as he gives out small glasses of chocolate milk. They lean closer to Vil, smiling as the third year looks at them from the corner of his eye, "Wow, that was boring as shit."

Vil stealthily elbows Yuu in the sternum, just enough to jostle her off of his person but not enough to hurt, "If by boring, you must mean civilized. Or maybe mannered. I'll even accept refined."

"That's what I said. Boring." Yuu walks the floor, showing the many unfinished bowls, "Most took one slurp of noodles and instantly forfeited. But, Vil made them sit and suffer through the spice until the buzzer rang since they made the choice to do the challenge. Some actually managed to finish though."

Yuu moves the camera toward Rook. The Florian smiling with a red face but mostly unfazed, taking small sips of his chilled milk.

"Was it good, Rook?"

"It was wondrous! The taste reminded me of a family-owned business ma famille visited at the edge of the Scalding Sands in my youth. I will admit, I believe this was spicier! All in all, beauté! 100 points from me!"

"I'm so glad!" The camera moves over to Epel, the first year hunched over with his hands gripping onto his knees as he panted, "How about you, Epel? Did you have fun?"

The shorter first year doesn't turn around, only lifting one of his arms to flip the bird.

"EPEL!"

Epel finally looks up, glaring over his shoulder at Vil. His face was bright red, sweat clearly dripping down his face. His shirt was unbuttoned, his tie undone and hanging limply around his neck. Shaking his head, he looked over to Grim, the cat monster lazily slurped up noodles from the unfinished bowls, "Time!?"

Grim huffed, eyes looking to the wall clock to his left. Chewing before he swallowed, "You're at 3 minutes."

"GAWD DAUMN’IT!"

"EPEL!"

Yuu chuckles, "Just take the milk, Epel." They shake their head as Epel waves Vil away, nonverbally telling the house-warden to leave him alone, “Epel, you’re suffering. Just drink the damn milk.”

“No!” The first-year groans at Vil’s glare, shaking his head as though it would shake the spice out of his mouth, “ ‘m nawt givin’ up til ah outlast those two bootlickers at least!”

“You’re drooling on the nice rug, Epel. Tap out before Vil makes us cut the cameras to beat your ass.”

“FUCK OFF BEFORE AH CREAM YAWR CORN!”

“Before you what my what!?” Yuu laughs, almost dropping the camera from their shaking. Their laughter only grew stronger seeing Vil’s figure walking into frame and covering the camera before the feed cuts.

~*~*~*~*~*~

This opening was the shortest so far. A black screen with bright blue lights lining out blocky text to spell 'Ignihyde' before the text enlarges. The text engulfs the screen, transitioning to show Yuu lounging on a futuristic couch with a giddy Ortho sitting on the armrest.

" Welcome back, Cuties! I'm here in the cutting-edge Ignihyde lounge with the darling of the underworld, Ortho Shroud."

Ortho waved happily, eyes closed to show the illusion of a smile, "Hello everyone! I'm happy I was asked to help host this segment. Ignihyde will do their best to win this challenge! We've had nights where we trained by eating spicy chips and candy. I believe the overall spice tolerance of the dorm increased by 18.7%!"

Yuu leans closer to Ortho, giving a stage whisper, "Is that high?"

Ortho leans just as close, eyes wide as he nodded softly, "Yes. Those are very good numbers."

"Well, you heard the numbers folks! Ignihyde could take the crown!"

"CROWN!?"

The camera wipes over to the shout. Huddled out of sight were most of the challengers. But seeing the camera focused on them, they began to scatter and shove at each other. Idia was the unlucky one left behind, even though he was the one who shouted.

He shied away from the lens, lips pressed together in a frown as he scrambled to pull his hood over his head, "Y-you…you said that the prize was a class credit…what am I supposed to do with some dumb IRL crown…?"

Ortho fell into view, thankfully shielding his brother from view and helping to calm his nerves, "Nii-San! Think about it though. If we had a physical crown, we could display it! It'll be a conversation starter for new students and a point of pride!"

Idia simply sulked harder, almost appearing to fold under an invisible weight as his back hunched farther, "I was gonna use that free credit to get out of gym for the semester…what am I gonna do now…?"

"Nii-San…"

Yuu smiled from their seat, standing up to grab the camera from Grim and walk closer to Idia, ignoring him trying to close his hoodie opening around his face, " C'mon, Idia! You may not have a free class credit, but you get a free crown~. Think of the cosplay potential!"

"..." Idia slowly perked up, mumbling under his breath, "There is…the King of the Soul Darks cosplay I've been wanting to try…having a crown already made would save time if I don't have to change it up too much…" With a frown and panic still clear on his face, Idia turns back to Yuu and nods, "Fine…"

"Great! You were going to do it anyway since you agreed to in the first place. A verbal contract is still a contract, Idia, and I'm not above dragging you through a whole legal process over it.."

"Geez! Why are you always so aggro to me!?" He scowls, turning to sulk as the tips of his hair flicker into a red hue, "I swear I thought you and Azul-Shi dating would nerf you both, it just buffed your worst stats instead. Not to mention all the debuff attacks you gained from getting Jamil-Shi and Malleus-Shi…"

Yuu laughs from behind the camera, shooing Idia away, "Yeah, yeah. Go cry about it at the table. The ghosts will be here soon."

Ortho floated behind Idia, brows downturn as he whined slightly, "Nii-San! You promised you'd do the event since you said it was too dangerous for me to do!" His expression perked up, tilting his head in a show of excitement, " But, if you really don't want to do it, I'll compete in your place!"

"No, Ortho." Idia shakes his head, taking his seat at the head of the table, "I normally don't mind making the proper upgrades for you to taste and eat food. But the level of spice that was advertised got me worried about the internal damage your wiring could take. I'm all for you having fun, but not at your own risk…"

"Ah…that's true…but if you really don't want to…"

Idia smiles, small and soft as he ruffles the flames on Ortho's head, "I'm fine. I'm upset the loot isn't gonna be as good as I thought. But loot is loot ya know? Plus, you did help me grind for this. It'd be a waste to let all your hard work go untested."

"Omg, y'all cute as fuck."

Ortho giggles, eyes closing in joy as Idia turns to the camera with a glare, "Do you mine? This is a family-only cut scene here…"

The sound of Grim yelling broke their moment, the cat monster yelling about seeing the familiar line of ghosts entering the pocket dimension.

Yuu angles the camera back to their face, smiling and throwing up a peace sign, "It's that time again, Cuties! Who will win? The Spice of Life or the Spawn of Hades? Find out after this commercial break!"

~*~*~*~*~*~

The camera cuts back to screaming.The whole of Ignihyde surrounded Idia as he struggled to slurp up the noodles in his bowl, face red and the color slowly spreading into his hair. The other dorm members all shouted encouragement, chanting out Idia’s name and let out a wild cheer when he swallowed the last of the noodles.

Yuu points to the bowl from out of frame, managing to yell over the cheering Ignihyde members, "You gotta drink the broth! The broth!"

Idia gives out a frustrated yell, but grabs onto the bowl and brings it to his face. The chant changed from his name to a simple 'Chug'. Yuu swings the camera around, showing the other dorm members in their various states of post-spice consumption. But closest in the crowd were Cater and Ortho, each cheering on either of Idia’s sides.

Before long, the sound of a bowl hitting the table made the crowd go wild. Ignihyde yelled and jumped around. A simple victory but one that the dorm would be sure to hold over anyone who brought up the challenge. At that point, they were the only dorm that managed to have everyone finish their bowls.

Yuu cheers, moving the camera to show her and Grim joining the hug that Ortho and Cater engulfed Idia in, " He did it! He finished the bowl of broth and all! The spawn of Hades beat the Spice of Life!!!"

The video ends on Idia’s teary smile, the house-warden smiling through the burning to give a peace sign.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Diasomnia was intimidating, even through the medium of film. Yuu only showed the large imposing castle against the dark sky, the silence of their boots crunching on dried dirt.

Opening the massive doors, Yuu is greeted by a few Diasomnia students, most of them jumping up and rushing to the dining room upon seeing them. Walking to the seemingly mile-long dining hall, Yuu quickly ran to the end of the table, "Malleus! I'm here!"

The Draconia heir looks up from the table, smiling brightly and opening his arms to accept their hug. Chuckling as Yuu makes themselves at home in his lap, "Child of man. I'm glad you've come. I was beginning to worry you had forgotten about me…"

Yuu coos, camera angled away but you could hear the over dramatic sounds of them pressing kisses to Malleus's face, "I could never forget you. You're too tall for that."

Pulling away, Yuu laughs, showing Malleus's pouting face before showing the camera a snoozing Silver, "Silver!"

Aurora eyes snap open, looking around in brief panic before he calms. Making eye contact, he eased back into his normal neutral expression, "Oh, Yuu. It's starting soon then?"

"Yep! You guys are the last dorm of the night so let's try to get this wrapped up nice and neat. Roll call boys!"

Silver nods, sitting up straighter in his chair, "I'm Silver…VanRouge. I'm not sure if I enjoy spicy food…but Lilia said this would be a good experience and excuse to find out."

The camera moves, Sebek nearly sending his chair to the floor from how fast he stood up, "Im Sebek Zigvolt! The only reason I'm doing this pitiful human challenge is to show the might of not only Diasomnia, but of Waka-Sama himself!"

Yuu moved closer, speaking in a stage whisper to Sebek's serious expression, "Hey Sebek, can you yell louder? I think the dead are still asleep."

Sebek's frown only grew deeper, clearly biting his tongue to not insult his employer's lover.

The camera moved to show Malleus, the horned fae still pouting and remaining silent.

"..." Yuu tilts their head, "Peligroso?"

"...Do you really only remember me because I'm tall?"

"Oh my God. Sebek hold this." The camera was shoved into Sebek's hands. The first-year fumbling and turned it off briefly. When the camera cuts back in, Yuu is on Malleus's lap. Yuu was asking Sebek to double-check check the camera was on again as Malleus happily hummed into Yuu's neck.

Yuu had to prompt him to look up and acknowledge the camera to introduce himself, "I am Malleus Draconia, heir of Briar Valley. I'm curious to see if the human concept of 'spicy' will even register to my pallet."

"Because you can breathe fire, you think you can't taste if food is spicy?" Yuu tilts their head in question, comfortably lounging in Malleus's hold, giggling when the fae responds by breathing a smoke ring at them.

The camera was forcibly moved, ruby eyes glittering in excitement, "Hello~! You saw me earlier today as a guest chef! I'm Lilia VanRouge. I'm so excited for this challenge!" He pouts, releasing his hold on the camera to float over Malleus and Yuu, "Though I am mildly upset. They wouldn't let me cook for our dorm like I did for Scarabia…"

"Well Lilia, you are competing. It'd be a conflict of interest." Not to mention his food would simply take out the whole dorm that he did Scarabia…

Silver shuddered briefly, thankful he didn't have to eat his father's idea of 'spicy food'. Once the phantom stomach pains had ended, he questioned Yuu, "Did you not come with Grim?"

"He stopped at the kitchen to see if he could get a bowl before the challenge started. He's done pretty well waiting at each challenge all day so this was to be expected…"

No more than 10 minutes had passed before Grim rushed into the room, crashing into Yuu's arms. He looked up with a panicked expression, "We gotta cancel."

"What?"

Jamil suddenly appeared, covering Grim's mouth and pulling him off Yuu's lap, "Don't mind him. He's just mad I didn't let him have any of the food."

Lilia perks up, smiling at the Scarabia student, "Oh Jamil! So good to see you up again. Feeling better I see?"

"Oh, I'm going to."

Yuu climbs off Malleus's lap, smiling nervously at Jamil’s calm expression, "Hey Jamil…babe

…were you…in the kitchen?"

"Yes. I decided to pay Lilia back for giving our dorm such a challenge. So I convinced the ghosts to let me be a guest chef."

"..." Yuu smiles to the camera, making eye contact with Sebek who seemed just as on edge as they were, "Riiiiight…Well! I guess I'm right to assume the ghosts- oh! There they are! Sebek, give Grim the camera and go sit."

Sebek mumbled briefly, stating that Yuu wasn't 'the boss of him' before handing the camera to a nervous Grim. Yuu realized why Grim was nervous. The food was hot, of course, but the smell was much different than the standard spicy noodles every other dorm had gotten. The scent was almost painful. Clear, bright orange flecks are seen in the steamy broth. A few students were already tearing up from the vapors alone, turning away to try to clear their eyes.

"..." Yuu whispers, standing beside a smiling Jamil, "Babe, what the fuck did you do?"

Jamil shrugged, looking at the camera with a serene smile, "Oh I just added some dried peppers that I had in the Scarabia kitchen that Kalim had imported. A few sauces from my personal stash. A few tablespoons of pure capcaisin."

"Jamil…" Yuu was struggling to not laugh, realizing the actual danger Jamil had just brought into the dorm, "Jamil, there's innocent people here."

He reaches over, his hand gripping onto Yuu's chin to keep them in place as he turns his head. Almost hissing out with a growl from his throat, "I don't care."

"Jamil." Their laughter was high, amused but on the edge of hysteria.

Silver looked into the bowl before him. Raising his hand as he followed his gut, "I'd like to forfeit."

The Scarbia student nodded, mildly disappointed one of his victims had the brain cells to drop out, "That'd be for the best."

Yuu looked to the camera, smiling through the worry, "If you're watching, pray for them!"

~*~*~*~*~*~

"You could have killed someone."

Jamil’s satisfied smile slid into an annoyed frown, raising an eyebrow in question, "What do you call what happened in Scarabia?"

"A miscalculation. This was just attempted manslaughter, again."

Grim floated over the 'remains' of Diasomnia. Silver doing his best to help Trey pass out baggies of whipped cream or casting cooling charms on the groaning students. Malleus sat at the head of the table, hands clasped tightly and face tense, but still pale. Sebek lay prone on the floor, eyes closed as if he was sleeping. The only hint that he had taken part in the challenge was that his face was beet red, almost glowing.

Lilia stood braced against a wall, taking deep and slow breaths. His jacket and vest were off, anything to keep his body cool. He looked over his shoulder, face carrying a decent blush from the heat, "What did you use?"

"Trade secret."

"Hmmp. I suppose. We really must cook together Jamil! I haven't had food with such a kick since I first had Scalding Sands cuisine! Though…next time maybe use a bit less of your 'trade secret'? It was so spicy I couldn't taste anything…"

Jamil smiles, shrugging and moving to leave the room, "Aw. Too bad. But, I guess we'll see if I have the time in my schedule." He stops at Yuu, pressing a kiss to their cheek and waving goodbye, "Later."

Shaking their head, they watch their boyfriend leave, "He really showed up, committed a crime, and said 'Later'." Their gaze turns to Malleus, the fae staring down at the table as though it would unlock untold secrets, "Malleus? You okay?"

The fae looks up, frowning before he tried to speak. Instead of words, all that came out of his open mouth was a ball of green fire. The flames thankfully stopped the moment he closed his mouth, though it left the table heavily scorched.

"O-oh! Oh, baby boy…was it spicy?" Yuu laughs at the pout Malleus sends their way. They walk over to nuzzle and press kisses to Malleus's cheeks, Grim turning away from them to film Sebek's still form.

Moments pass before Grim calls out, "Hey, is he breathing?"

…

Silver walks over, a finger placed under Sebek's nose to check his breathing.

…

"..." Silver breathes a sigh of relief, "He's breathing."

Yuu speaks up, "Okay, he needs a whole ass hospital…"

~*~*~*~*~*~

The final video opened with Yuu sitting in the Ramshackle lounge, the fireplace alight and casting the room in a warm glow as they stroked a sleeping Grim.

"Well, Cuties. We had a fun day. We saw some sights, heard some sounds, committed a few crimes. A successful prank if I do say so myself."

Yuu pauses smiling at the camera before they nod, "Yes. A prank. This was all a little joke that I now realize, I probably shouldn't have done. I forget sometimes that Night Raven boys are competitive, and vicious, and a little stupid." Their laughter momentarily disturbed Grim. The cat monster huffs on their lap until they quiet down.

Once they were sure Grim was peacefully sleeping, Yuu looked back to the camera, "But in all seriousness, I'm not taking responsibility for the various food crimes committed on film today. Like…Lilia was a mistake that I should have seen coming. I did not know Jamil was going to come in with the fucking chair at the last round…I hope the nurse isn't mad at me. She's a nice lady…"

They shrug, "Well, Cuties. That's all for today from me! This is Yuu signing off and let's hope you don't see me hosting a challenge again, because at this point I fear I will actually get someone killed with my cruel and unusual torture methods. Or as I like to call them, Funny Little Ha-Ha's."

Yuu smiles, waving as the video fades to black.

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