#also yeah i was an annoying 19 year old what do you want me to say
Note
i’m friends with one of your exes and we constantly laugh about how you got butthurt about a tag they made on a post saying they’d been pretending to like your gifs AND THEN ran to twitter to subtweet about people who care about you doing things to hurt you. my favourite part is that your friends saw the tag and told you about it and it hurt your pride enough for you to reach out even though you blocked her after agreeing to stay friends. ps your gifs are still horrendous lmao
THIS IS SO FUCKING FUNNNYYYY it is 2023 and i don’t make gifs anymore because i’m 25 years old with a full time job and do not give a shit about my “ex” who wasn’t even ever my ex. grow up 😭 move on 😭
#why are you so obsessed with me this was in 2017 hahahahahaha#also yeah i was an annoying 19 year old what do you want me to say#i grew up why don’t you#anonymous#answered
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THE GRUDGE (or: the 7 things luke castellan hated about you)
read part two GET HIM BACK! (or: the 7 reasons you want revenge on luke castellan)
pairing: luke castellan x child of nemesis!reader (gender not specified)
word count: 8.5k
summary: luke hated your guts. he really did. he just hoped that no one could tell how, even after all this, you're still everything to him.
warnings/disclaimer: luke's POV. spoilers for the lightning thief and season 1 of pjo. some heated make-out sessions but no actual smut - MDNI / 18+. mentions of blood + death + alcohol. luke is 19 during tlt but i wrote this with him + reader being 21 by the end of this (this is important for the next part lol). anyways, luke + reader share clothes and lots of intense emotions they maybe possibly don't process in the best way. lots of ANGST - it's a greek tragedy fr!
author's note: welcome to my new hyperfixation! this fic is LONG but i hope she's worth it ♡
♪: the grudge by olivia rodrigo
(i. you have a sharp tongue)
fourteen year old luke was overwhelmed when he first stepped into the hermes cabin. it was loud and overcrowded and no one really seemed to care that they had a new cabinmate. the head counselor showed luke to an empty bed at the back, told him to get settled in, and left without another word. luke dropped his backpack before collapsing on the mattress. it was so thin that he could feel the springs dig into his back.
"you'll get used to it."
luke sat up to see you climbing through the window.
you had a band-aid stuck on your chin, chipped nail polish the color of blackberries, and leather combat boots that looked way too heavy to be wearing in the heat of summer.
“the shitty mattress?”
“i meant the whole chaos of cabin 11, and the way things work around here in general. if you can get used to the shitty mattress, all power to you.”
your tone was friendly enough, playful even. you smiled at him so comfortably it made luke nauseous.
“good to know.” he tried to smile back at you, but his heart wasn’t in it. “i’m luke, by the way.”
“yeah, i know. i’m —”
“y/n!”
you seemed entirely unfazed as the blond who called your name stormed over to you. you rolled your eyes, something only luke could notice, before turning to her.
“someone stole my candy.”
“i’m very sorry to hear that, maddy. gotta be careful around here.” your voice dripped like poisoned honey, deceptively innocent and sweet.
maddy was not having it. she huffed at you. “it was you, wasn’t it?”
“that depends. did you cheat at poker last night? again?”
some of the chatter throughout the cabin paused, heads turning to listen in.
“what? n-no!”
“then you have your answer, maddy.” you exaggerated a sigh, as though you had already won the fight and were annoyed that she came back for more. “now, if you’ll excuse me, i have a new camper to show around.”
chiron had already given them a tour, but luke didn’t protest when you grabbed his hand and pulled him out of the window with you. your hand was warm in his as you dragged him along to the corner of the cabin where a poorly made ladder waited for you.
“come on.” you started climbing, and only stopped to look down when you realized luke wasn’t following you. “best view of camp. trust me.”
a shiver passed through luke. trust didn’t come easy to him. he also didn’t particularly want to return to a stuffy cabin where all he would do was count reasons he did not want to be there.
so, luke followed you. he sat down next to you on the roof and looked out at the sun shining on his new home, but he couldn't help but be slightly bitter. the gods had gotten all of you into this life of endless danger and battles and monsters, and this was all they had to offer in return: a summer camp.
it just didn't seem fair.
there was something else he noticed then. what was it that chiron had said? camp half-blood was supposed to be a safe haven for all demigods.
“i don’t get it. there are only twelve cabins, but aren’t there, like, a million other gods?”
you straightened your posture then, and turned to luke with a newfound interest.
“camp half-blood only has cabins representing the twelve olympians. apparently, they’re the only ones important enough to have children worth recognizing, and they can’t even do that half the time,” you explained, impertinence laced throughout your words. it seemed like something you could never quite get off your chest.
every demigod knew that the gods didn’t appreciate sarcasm. they didn’t particularly like being called out on their bullshit, either.
you didn’t seem to care; you even rolled your eyes up at the sky, as if challenging zeus himself.
“anyways, that’s why the hermes cabin is so crowded. it takes in campers who are unclaimed or whose parent doesn’t have a cabin at camp. like me.”
“so, who’s your godly parent?”
you fiddled with the leather cord on your neck. it held a few clay beads like the other campers, but there was one silver charm he noticed only you wore — scales, by the looks of it. you clutched onto it.
luke realized that, despite your own advice, maybe you resented having to get used to the way things worked around here, and having to hide your resentment. maybe that was worse than having to sleep on an uncomfortable bed for the rest of your life.
"nemesis. goddess of revenge."
"that's....hardcore."
you scoffed and moved on to twisting the silver ring on your index finger. "a lot of people take it that way, and i think it scares them a bit.”
“so that’s why you’re extra nice to new campers, huh?”
“no, i was just in a good mood today.” you smirked.
“guess i was just lucky, then.”
luke couldn’t help but smile at your laugh — sharp, biting. you nudged your boot against his sneaker, which shifted you closer to him, shoulders practically touching.
“what people don’t understand is that it's more about balance, you know? you do good things, and good things happen to you. at least, they should. you do bad things and….” you pulled out an outrageously big bag of candy, dropped it between you and luke, and winked at him. “you face the consequences.”
“that makes sense.” luke leaned over to grab a handful of gummy bears. “like karma.”
“yeah. exactly.”
you bit the head off a red bear, both of you chewing in silence before you added:
“by the way, i’m sorry about your friend.” you swallowed and caught luke’s gaze.
chiron warned him that word would travel fast around camp about what happened to thalia, and luke had prepared himself for anything — anything but your reaction. there was no pity in your eyes; instead, there was a hint of rage, as though thalia had been your friend, too.
“she deserved more.”
luke’s eyes caught the glint of a knife strapped to your belt. he took another handful of the candy you stole, and he thought about the fire and fearlessness behind your words, and, despite everything, it felt right to be with you then and there.
“yeah,” he finally whispered back. “she did.”
we all do.
neither of you said those words, but the suggestion was there, and it felt like a promise.
(ii. you hold on to every stupid, little detail)
“slow down, tiger.”
your voice echoed throughout the arena, and if luke had been fighting a real opponent, it might have gotten him killed. instead, he just stopped mid-swing, sparing another straw dummy from losing its arm.
“left hand,” you noted as you walked past him towards a bench. “you, my friend, are in need of a break.”
luke loosened the grip on his sword. the only time luke fought with his non-dominant hand was when he had overworked the other. he must have switched an hour ago, but judging by how heavy his arm felt, it could have very well been two.
his curls were stuck to his forehead with sweat, his shirt soaked through. he could feel a dull pain behind his eyes, and luke was worried that if he stopped to catch his breath, he would pass out. or, even worse, have to face the reality of the shitty news he’d gotten early that day.
“come sit with me,” you urged. “you’re exhausted, tiger.”
luke bristled at your nickname for him.
sure, luke loved that there was something only you called him, a secret kept between you in plain sight, but it was also a reminder that it was harder to hide behind the hero act when you were around.
everyone else at camp figured the nickname was a playful attempt at calling him strong and charismatic. the truth was that luke once told you that his favorite cereal as a kid was frosted flakes and that he would dream of playing sports as well as tony the tiger. for better or for worse, like most things, you wouldn’t let it go.
case in point: if it was anybody other than you trying to get him to take a break, luke could have just brushed them off with a charming smile and continued swordfighting until his arms fell off, but in the two years since meeting you, luke had never met anyone as stubborn and convincing. like him, it seemed you were willing to fight and shed blood to get your way. luke was never really in the mood to make you bleed, even when feeling like he could burn the entire world down, so he usually gave in to your demands.
as soon as he sat down next to you, you handed him an orange flavored energy drink — his favorite. anything other than water was hard to come by at camp without the enchanted goblets in the dining pavilion, or the right connection in the hermes cabin. he ran out of his stash the other day, but you must have noticed and gotten one of the stoll brothers to smuggle more in.
“thanks,” luke said, ignoring the jolt of electricity that passed through him when your fingers brushed together briefly.
the two of you looked out at the sword arena, and all the straw dummies that luke had destroyed. you wait for him to take three big gulps of his drink before speaking again.
“i guess chiron and your dad decided you weren’t ready for a quest.”
luke exhaled sharply. “how did you —”
“the only time you’d skip out on capture the flag is if something really shitty happened.” you looked down at luke’s clenched fists, and that seemed to be all the confirmation you needed. “you promised annabeth you'd be there, and it's not like you to let her down."
fuck. he had completely forgotten that tonight was annabeth's first time as team captain. this entire week, she had been prepping a winning strategy. it wasn’t like annabeth needed him to win, but luke was her big brother, and he should have been there. you were right — he had let her down.
the realization made luke’s day go from bad to worse.
"i told her you were helping a new camper with an emergency. she didn't believe it, but she adjusted her strategy and we still won.”
“well, thank the gods everything worked in the end,” luke grumbled.
“don’t thank the gods,” you quipped. “thank annabeth chase for her brilliant mind, and me for covering for your sorry ass.”
when luke didn’t indulge in your usual playful banter, you moved closer to him and brushed some curls away from his eyes. your skin warmed his forehead, and the small gesture made him feel better than he had all day.
“look, i’m not going to give you some bullshit inspirational speech about how the gods don’t get to define what a hero is, or how you don’t need a quest to prove that you’re worthy of being one. we’ve each been through that before, and i have a feeling this won’t be our last time, either.”
“then why are you here?” the question came out harsher than luke had intended it to.
“because she’s trying her best to hide it, but annabeth is really hurt that you didn’t show up for the game. i figured the least you could do is suck it up, come to the campfire, and make her those signature luke castellan s’mores. you could probably use one, too, since you haven’t eaten anything since breakfast.”
you were right, again. luke was exhausted, he was furious, but most of all, he was starving.
later that night, luke sat next to annabeth and vowed to make her as many s’mores as she wanted. you’d gone to sit with the hephaestus kids, trying to convince beckendorf and nyssa to join your cabin’s post-campfire party at the beach, even though they had to work in the forges early the next morning.
when chiron made his weekly speech, congratulating the winners of capture the flag and thanking the gods for keeping everyone safe, you and luke caught each other’s gaze from across the fire. you rolled your eyes and luke bit back a smile as you turned back to beckendorf. he noticed your knees were practically touching. did you sit that close to everyone?
luke was looking at you for so long that the marshmallow he was roasting fell into the fire, despite annabeth’s warnings. she handed him another one.
"you should tell her how you feel," annabeth said. "stop being a coward."
whether it was the smell of burnt sugar, the heat of the fire, or annabeth’s comment, luke started to feel dizzy. he did his best to shake it off, asking annabeth for a play-by-play of her strategy earlier that night, but he couldn’t quite get rid of the thought of you.
(iii. you don't care if your clothes are stained with blood)
“i just….i can’t fucking believe you, luke.”
“i don’t get why you’re so upset — you’ve never cared about quests before.”
luke was hoping to break the news to you after capture the flag. unfortunately for him, word travels fast around camp.
annabeth had the two of you scouting the east side for the flag, while she and some other athena kids took the west. you hadn’t found anything so far, which meant that you’d spent the better part of an hour bickering over luke’s choice of companions for his quest. a choice that included charles beckendorf and chris rodriguez, and purposefully did not include you, much to your fury.
before you could continue arguing, luke heard the sound of footsteps approaching. he looked over to you, and you already had your shield and sword at the ready.
a few red defenders emerged from the trees. one charged at luke, but you stepped in so he could deal with the other two. one of his opponents went down fairly easily, but the other put up much more of a fight. metal clashed behind him as you kept fighting as well. you might not have been as skilled a swordfighter as luke, but he knew that you could hold your own, at least until he was finished with the person in front of him.
luke parried his opponent’s strike, causing them to take a step closer. he was preparing to disarm them, just as he heard you yelp and stumble to the ground. it only took a millisecond of his attention, but it gave his opponent the opportunity to elbow him in the face. luke felt a crack upon impact, and pain radiated from his nose; he powered through.
he had to finish this fight, and he had to do it fast. you needed him.
his ears were ringing as he finally knocked over his opponent, kicking away their sword and keeping his foot on their chest. luke turned around to see you having turned the tides, the blade of your sword dangerously close to your opponent’s neck.
you locked eyes with luke, and you both understood — it was time to go. the two of you ran through the forest, as far away as you could before having to stop and catch your breath.
luke removed his helmet to get some air, and dropped his weapons. you did the same. you looked at him, brows furrowed.
“your nose.”
luke licked his lips, tasting blood. the triumph of winning that last fight overshadowed the ache of his potentially broken nose. in fact, he liked the image of a ruthless warrior emerging from the glory and gore of battle, that even though he did not bleed ichor like a god, he still had power.
you, on the other hand, didn’t look impressed. instead, you stepped forward and offered the sleeve of your shirt to wipe away the blood.
“you don’t have to —”
“i know you think you’re a badass walking around all broken and bloody, but you shouldn’t deny your admirers your pretty face,” you teased.
it was no secret that luke had numerous admirers around camp, a fact you loved to tease him about. he was sure that you relished in how flustered that made him. all you had to call him was pretty boy, and luke could be reduced to a blushing mess.
it was pathetic how much power you had over him.
“besides, i wouldn’t have gotten out of that last fight if you hadn’t taught me that disarming technique earlier. i owe you. it’s what we do. we take care of each other, right?”
he couldn’t argue with that.
a few moments of silence passed as you cleaned his face. something shifted as you worked, the flirtatious grin fading away. when you pulled away, your sleeve was stained a dark crimson.
“just tell me honestly,” you finally murmured. “why don't you want me to join your quest?”
luke was genuinely taken aback by the softness of your voice, now devoid of its usual fire. you wouldn’t meet luke’s eyes, but being that close to you, he noticed they were slightly glazed over.
he had expected you to be angry at his decision. he expected you to yell and argue and try to change his mind. luke hadn’t expected you to be so hurt. so broken.
he hadn’t planned on it, but luke decided to tell you the truth then.
“look, karma, if you come with me, my heart wouldn’t fully be in the quest. i’d be so caught up in….well, you.”
a pause.
“is that a bad thing?”
“not usually, no.”
you smirked a little at that, and luke’s heart skipped a beat. it also made his decision even clearer.
“but i need to be focused for this. i need….” he let out a deep sigh. “i need to prove myself. this is my first real chance, and i can’t fuck it up.”
you met his gaze and smiled brightly at him, your signature spark of confidence returning.
“you won’t.”
you reached a hand up to play with his necklace. luke hadn’t noticed how close you’d gotten until your fingers started tracing over those four clay beads. it made his entire body burst into flames.
“i’ve been wanting to do something for a while. and, aphrodite save me, it might be really stupid, but —”
luke took a lucky guess as to where you were going, and crashed his lips against yours. aphrodite knows that he'd been wanting to do that for a while, too.
he often got drunk on the adrenaline of battle, the glory of winning, but nothing was quite like the rush of kissing you for the first time.
it was messy and urgent, both of you aware that, at any moment, you could be interrupted. your noses were bumping together, teeth clacking against each other. the metallic tang of blood lingered on luke’s tongue, but neither of you seemed to care. you even bit his lip slightly, as if you wanted more. armor sat heavy and cold between your chests, preventing you from getting closer. luke had never loathed the protective gear more.
he made up for it by lodging one hand underneath your jaw, and snaking the other beneath the celestial bronze, beneath the cotton of your shirt, admiring how your pulse quickened under his thumb when he grazed the soft skin of your stomach. you tangled your hands into his hair, nails scraping against his scalp. he groaned and felt you smirk against his lips.
luke had kissed a few people before, sure, but never like this: like a knife to the gut, and if you pulled away, luke would surely bleed out and die.
it wouldn’t be a hero’s death, in the traditional sense, but at least he’d die happy.
how many heroes could claim that?
when luke ran out of air, feeling like his lungs were burning, he had to pull away.
you glanced down at luke’s kiss-bitten lips, then back to his eyes. luke flushed under the intensity of your gaze.
“just promise me something, tiger,” you whispered, voice hoarse.
“anything.”
“come back alive.”
luke leaned forward and placed another kiss on your lips, this one much gentler than before.
“i promise.”
(iv. you love like a scar that won't fade)
the nightmares were getting worse.
luke woke up in a cold sweat, taking gulps of air in an attempt to steady his breathing.
“luke.”
your whisper did little to quell the pit of dread growing in his stomach, but it did enough to bring him back down to reality.
he was at camp half-blood (fuck the gods of olympus), in the hermes cabin (fuck you, dad), in a bed next to yours (fuck, if he could tell you what — who — was going through his head, he would).
“i’m…i’m fine,” he murmured back, voice catching slightly on the lie.
like clockwork, you shifted from your bed to his, slipping under the covers. it didn’t matter that it was a hot summer night, and the minute your legs touched his, he could feel himself starting to overheat.
your thumb brushed over the thick edge of his scar, up his cheekbone to the corner of his eye. it had been a year, living with this reminder. a reminder that he had failed, just as much as his father and the olympians had failed him.
luke tried to pretend that he didn’t come back from his quest as a shell of who he once was. after all, it was meant to be his shining moment as a demigod, meant to gain him all the glory and father’s praise he once wished for.
what a fucking joke.
every morning, luke would crawl into a different skin. he welcomed new campers and taught sword-fighting. he laughed with chris and his other siblings and strategized with annabeth for capture the flag. he would be the easy-going, charming, skillful senior counselor who respected the gods and honored them in everything he did.
again: a fucking joke.
nights were different, though, with you so close to him, you who could always see right through him.
every night, luke was a fourteen-year old boy again, with so much rage and resentment he didn't know what to do with it.
of course, you were always you - a bleeding heart underneath layers of armor. you didn't care about fate, or the gods, or the titans. you cared about justice, you cared about what was right and fair.
most of all, you cared about luke.
“you were screaming,” you told him, voice barely cutting through the soft snores and sleeptalkings of your other cabinmates.
“sorry,” he managed. looking at you in the dull moonlight, luke noticed the deep shadows under your eyes.
“it’s fine. you just….you scared me, tiger.”
your hand still rested on his cheek, and for a second, luke hoped you would kiss him, but you didn’t. instead, you told him to try and get some sleep, and sank further into his bed before closing your eyes.
for the hundredth night in a row, luke hoped you couldn’t hear his heart hammering in his chest as you fell asleep next to him.
since coming back from his quest, luke didn’t have it in him to suggest being anything other than friends, and you didn’t push it. there had been a few....moments between you, sure, but nothing more.
luke thought you might have changed your mind, because who would want to be with a bitter, worthless, wannabe hero? then again, that voice haunting his dreams…. luke could change that.
but, at what cost?
(v. you protect people as ruthlessly as a starving dog)
luke could hear you talking to percy jackson outside. though he couldn’t quite determine what was being said, as much as he tried.
you entered the bathroom and instantly caught luke’s eyes in the mirror. you were wearing your faded pyjama shorts with cartoon crows, and a flannel shirt that luke had a sneaking suspicion might have been his. you smiled at him before setting up at the counter, one sink between you.
���what was that about?” luke asked after spitting out a mouthful of minty toothpaste.
“oh, nothing.” you were searching through your toiletry bag for something, and seemed to come up short. “hey, do you have any extra dental floss?”
luke threw some over to you. as you effortlessly caught it, he noticed your knuckles, bruised and bloodied.
“what happened?”
you finished flossing and briefly examined your hands before pulling out your toothbrush.
“it’s not a big deal,” you assured. “some ares kids were picking on percy, and then they started pushing him around, like, really pushing him around, so….”
“....you decided to send them to the infirmary.”
you squeezed some toothpaste on your brush before continuing. “i don’t need you to lecture me about how i shouldn’t be fighting with other campers because i’ve been here longer and i should be a good role model. you know what a good role model does? not let kids beat up other kids and think the worst punishment they’ll get is no dessert for a week.”
luke watched carefully as you jammed the toothbrush in your mouth and brushed with such force, he was worried your teeth might dislodge. he knew that you would shed blood for someone you loved, and that you didn’t particularly care if you had to break rules in doing so, because you believed that what was written was not necessarily what was right.
in fact, luke loved that about you.
no, it wasn’t the fighting that luke cared about — it was who you were fighting for.
percy was a good kid, he really was. luke just didn’t want you getting attached.
“i wasn’t going to lecture you. i’m guessing chiron already did?”
you nodded and spat out what looked like a combination of toothpaste and blood. you rinsed your mouth until the water lost its pinkish hue. once you were done, luke continued his train of thought.
“i just didn’t realize you cared so much about him.”
“about percy?”
luke could tell that he didn’t have your full attention. you were packing your stuff back up, accidentally tossing luke’s dental floss into your bag, but he had more pressing matters to deal with.
“yeah. the kid’s only been at camp for three days, and you’re already acting like his guard dog.”
you finally turned to luke and glared at him.
“maybe. but percy’s sweet and he doesn’t seem like the type to put up with bullshit. he’s been through a lot, and annabeth seems to like him, too. as far as i’m concerned, percy’s one of us, and i’m not going to let anyone push him around.”
luke raised an eyebrow at you. “he’s sweet?”
“yeah. like, just now, he gave me some blue raspberry jelly beans as a thank you. said his mom used to work at a candy store. he also wanted me to apologize to you for him. he feels bad about beating you in sword-fighting earlier.”
you scoffed, like you resented luke for having to apologize to him on percy’s behalf. you definitely did not appreciate that guard dog comment. luke clenched his jaw, seething over what you had just said.
satisfied with his reaction, you gave luke that nauseating smile of yours, tilted your head towards the exit. a truce, because you never liked to fight with luke for too long, and a order, because you knew luke would always follow.
the two of you began walking back to your cabin in the warm mid-june air.
“i wouldn’t say he beat me,” luke huffed. “it was beginner’s luck.”
“sure, tiger. it was beginner’s luck that disarmed the best swordsman we’ve had in the last 300 years.”
you nudged luke’s shoulder with yours, but he recoiled from your touch.
“are you trying to make me feel worse?” luke tried his best to avoid snapping at you, keeping his tone measured.
“i’m just saying that maybe the kid has natural talent and that doesn’t make you any less talented. there’s no need to get jealous.”
luke resisted the urge to growl at your suggestion.
to be clear, he was not jealous. it’s just that luke had spent years of blood, sweat, and tears getting to where he was then, and percy jackson had just gotten to camp.
and, to be even more clear, luke was not jealous of how you were already defending percy with your whole body and your whole heart, the way you did for him.
by then, you reached the front of the hermes cabin. luke could already hear the commotion of what he would need to deal with as soon as he walked in. the burden of being head counselor, one he approached with an elastic smile that could snap at any moment.
you tugged on luke’s sleeve before he could open the door.
“hey. are we okay?”
luke looked down at your fingers grasping the fabric of a sweatshirt he was just realizing was yours. your nails were painted a dark red, now chipped after a week of wear. you had begged luke to paint his nails then, and once again, he gave in. he even started to like the purple you had chosen just for him, so deep it was almost black. the same color you were wearing the first time you and luke met.
he smiled at the memory — a real smile, no plastic — and then smiled back up at you.
“we’re fine, karma.” and he moved to enter the cabin. luke could hear the threat of an argument bubbling up, what sounded like a petty one over a prank gone wrong.
“wait.” you tugged at his (your) sweatshirt once more. “there’s something i wanted to talk to you about, about tomorrow night—”
“annabeth called a meeting during free time.”
“yeah, i know, it’s just —”
“she’ll run through strategy for capture the flag then.”
“one of the aphrodite senior campers asked me to the campfire,” you blurted it out, and luke decided to ignore the sound of a fight breaking out from behind the wooden door.
what in the name of hades were you talking about?
“they asked you out? like…like a….” luke didn’t even want to speak the word, scared it would make it real.
“a date,” you said casually, as if that one word didn’t rip luke’s heart in a million pieces. “i said yes.” an admission that took all those pieces and set them on fire.
sure, in the seven years since you and luke met, you’d each talked about boys, about girls, about dating and kissing them and going further. but there was something about this one that felt different. something about the way you told him.
“but, listen, i wanted to let you know it’s not —”
“good for you,” was all luke said through gritted teeth before someone started calling his name again, louder and more urgently, and he had to duck inside.
(vi. you taste like burning cherries and righteous anger)
your team had won capture the flag, of course. the biggest news of the evening, though: percy jackson was the son of the sea god.
he was a forbidden child, the hero of the great prophecy.
everything was falling into place.
all luke should be thinking about is kronos’ plan, and his role in it, and how a world without the gods of olympus was that much more in reach.
unfortunately, for the time being, he was so consumed by you.
you, from across the campfire, sporting cutoff denim shorts and fresh wounds from the game earlier. you, who had wrapped your knuckles in gauze, concealing their bruising, fixed the chips in your nail polish and stacked rings on your fingers. (for the record: luke had gifted you the one on your left thumb.) you, with dark lips that whispered too closely and laughed too loudly with a child of aphrodite— jordan li.
you hadn’t so much as looked at luke since congratulating each other on another win. when chiron announced his weekly gratitude to the gods at the start of that night’s campfire, you didn’t punctuate your resentment with your usual eye-roll or biting remark. you were too busy giggling at something jordan said.
luke wanted to be the one to whisper jokes in your ear. he wanted to be the one you left lipstick stains on later, along his jaw and down his neck. he wanted to be the one who kissed the blade mark on your shoulder and the bruises on your knuckles.
and yet, hours passed and it seemed that the thought of luke had never so much as crossed your mind. he found himself at an after hours party with a few senior campers on the beach. a lethal recipe: a poorly crafted bonfire, some contraband drinks and you in jordan li’s lap, playing with their hair and pretending luke castellan did not exist.
meanwhile, luke had katie gardner’s full attention. she was talking to him about the strawberry season, potentially leaning a bit too close into luke’s personal space, definitely flirting with him.
luke could have done a lot worse than the head counselor of the demeter cabin, who always smelled like fresh lavender, whose eyes were the bright green of spring grass and whose lips tasted like golden honey.
the problem was that luke only wanted you, and his eyes kept sliding over to where you were kissing jordan’s cheek, and he accidentally called the girl he was kissing by your name, which did not make her happy.
katie threw her drink in his face, told him to wake the fuck up, and walked away.
a chorus of gasps and chuckles erupted as luke stood there, diet coke and vodka seeping into his shirt. the commotion seemed to capture your attention, because you suddenly appeared next to luke, an empty bottle of cherry soda in your hand.
“rough night, tiger?” your voice, that nickname, made luke sick, his face twisting into a frown. you don’t seem to notice or care. instead, you switched your bottle with luke’s and took a sip.
“looks like you were having a pretty good time,” luke practically sneered. “where’s your date?”
“they went to bed.” you swallowed a mouthful of beer, grimacing at its bitterness. “gods, this is terrible. you and i should go on the drink run next time — we have better taste.”
“so, are you and jordan like a thing now?”
you gave luke a smile he didn’t quite understand, but made his stomach churn in ways only you could. “would that be a problem?”
“of course not.” he answered way too quickly for that to be true.
“let’s get out of here,” you suggested. “i think katie is about this close to strangling you with a tree branch.”
luke glanced over your shoulder to where green eyes glared back at him.
nowhere could luke find it in him to care. he wasn’t even sorry. he just shrugged, took the bottle back from you, took his first sip all night. luke almost gagged (because of course you were right, and the stoll brothers had better fake ids than they had taste) but he suppressed it.
“no. i’m good.”
biggest lie he ever said. like there wasn’t anger caught in his throat and jealousy swelling between his ribs.
“go find jordan,” he taunted. “kiss them, show them a good time! isn’t that the reason why you got all pretty?”
you narrowed your eyes at him carefully. your nostrils were slightly flared, and luke took a bit of pride in being able to rile you up.
“look, we haven’t really talked lately, and i think we should.”
“go find jordan,” he mocked once more. “almost all the aphrodite kids are here, and i’m sure you can be quiet enough to sneak into their cabin and if you want a quick fu—”
“luke.” you clipped his name, obviously getting to the limit of your patience with him. “if you want to stay here all night and be an asshole, you’re welcome to. you should know, though, that your happy-go-lucky hero mask is starting to crack and i don’t know if you could deal with the fallout from it shattering completely.”
you leaned in close and whispered that last part, very aware of the chattering that stopped and the eyes that watched the pair of you anxiously. luke was usually good at hiding that part of himself who wanted to burn the world down.
in ways you didn’t realize, you were right: he couldn’t risk revealing it, not now.
not yet.
“do whatever you want, castellan,” you spat out his last name, the combination of letters foreign in your mouth.“i’m leaving.”
luke should be proud of himself. he waited a whole two seconds before following you like a stray dog.
luke didn’t know if he’d ever felt you that enraged by him, and it horrified him. it also made him hungry for more.
“i’m not sure that jordan would want the two of us alone together at night,” he shouted after you, words echoing into the starless sky.
“gods, enough about jordan!” luke practically ran into you with how fast you turned around to confront him. “i was helping them with that stupid aphrodite tradition!”
“you….” luke faltered, all the snark leaving his body. “what?”
luke remembered silena beauregard once explaining the rite of passage to him: to prove themselves, a child of aphrodite had to make someone fall in love with them, and then break their heart.
“why…why would you agree to do that?”
you had reached the dining area by then, and you sat on one of the steps leading to the pavilion. luke stayed a few feet away, looking at you cautiously.
“jordan and i are already friends, and they figured a fake relationship would be the way to avoid anyone from actually getting hurt in the process.”
“you seemed so…so into it, though,” luke stammered, the memory of you in jordan’s lap, laughter bubbling from your lips, still fresh.
“it’s called acting, dumbass.” the camp didn’t rely on electricity, but there were enough torches around that luke could see you roll your eyes. “anyways, i was trying to give you a heads-up last night, but you wouldn’t listen.” you took a deep breath. “and, honestly, i didn’t push it because….i figured i should test a hypothesis.”
a hypothesis? you’d known annabeth for too long.
“what hypothesis?”
you hesitated.
“it doesn’t matter. fuck, this was stupid,” you muttered, and without another word, stormed through the dining pavilion, a short cut to the hermes cabin. your footsteps fell heavy against the marble, and luke’s not far behind.
“what hypothesis?” he asked again.
nothing but rushed footsteps.
“what hypothesis?” luke finally yelled.
third time was the charm, because you stopped in your tracks and faced luke once again. a fire burned in the bronze brazier, where campers were forced to offer up portions of your food to the gods at every meal. its roaring seemed to captivate you, and the flames danced across your face, illuminating all your curves and edges.
“i’m angry at the gods,” you stated.
this caught luke off guard. from the day the two of you met, luke knew you shared that feeling. you’d gotten quieter with your rage as you’d gotten older. luke supposed he got better at hiding it himself, as well.
“i’m angry at the gods for letting bad shit happen even if they can stop it, and for building this world in the fucked up way they did. i’m angry at your dad for the way he’s treated you, but — you, luke castellan.” you finally met luke’s eyes with a gaze so sharp, luke almost felt himself bleed. “i’m also angry at you, and not just for your bullshit tonight.”
your admission felt like a punch to the stomach, and luke was left with no air to breathe.
did you know?
“you haven’t been the same since your quest,” you continued, words slow and deliberate, the way you spoke when you were worried your voice would shake. “and i’ve come to terms with that in the past few years, but you….you’ve never tried to ice me out before. you’ve been acting distant since december, and it’s been driving me insane. do you realize how much i miss my best …..” you swallowed the word friend. “how much i miss you?”
luke hesitated, because what could he say? i know i’ve been distant, but i’ve been busy trying to start a war between the gods. sorry babe!
would you hate him, if you knew?
you had to have known that, despite the distance, luke missed you. for tartarus sake, in the last two days, he’d driven himself mad at you calling a fourteen year old boy sweet, and he was about to combust at the image of you dating someone else, with little care as to the collateral damage.
"you can't just avoid me, makeout with katie fucking gardner, and then….” you trailed off, hiding your face in your hands. whether it was to hide embarrassment or tears, luke wasn’t sure.
a smirk spread across luke’s face at the revelation that he hadn’t been the only one jealous at the bonfire that night. it lit luke up with the confidence he needed to not completely fall to his knees in front of you, beg for your forgiveness for everything he’s done.
“why do you care if i make out with katie fucking gardner?”
as he waited for a response, luke walked towards you until your back hit one of the marble columns.
“why do you care if i’m with jordan fucking li?” you clenched your jaw and looked right through luke. a clear indication that you wanted him to break down first; it wouldn’t be you who yielded this fight.
“because i want to be the one you’re with.” at that point, luke was so close to you that he swore he could hear your heartbeat. he reached out and played with the hem of your shorts. “why do you care if i make out with katie gardner?”
“because.” you drew in a sharp breath when luke’s fingers brushed underneath the denim, across the warm skin of your thigh. you closed your eyes. “don’t make me say it, tiger.”
the desperation in your voice made luke want to do unholy things with you, to you. luke knew you didn’t think of him as a saint, and you never expected him to be one. the reality was that you weren’t much better, either. what was essentially an altar to the gods burned bright next to you, but it seemed neither of you had ever cared less about it than in that moment.
luke would watch olympus fall. he would dethrone the gods and watch their glass castle shatter and find glory in a new world. in the grand scheme of things, he was willing to lose this battle.
in fact, he would have rather betrayed the titan lord himself than waste another second not kissing your lips.
so, he kissed you, and you kissed him back with such force, such hunger, it was ungodly.
no, you certainly weren’t a saint — but you were divine, in the most brutal, intoxicating way. in the way you shuddered when luke lodged a leg between your thighs; in the way you threaded your fingers through the belt loops of his jeans to bring him closer; in the way the metal of your rings burned through the skin of his hip, right to the bone, which made him shudder, and you smile triumphantly against his jaw.
the more he tasted your smirk flavored by cherry soda and the ashes of nearby flames, the more he felt your feral teeth against his neck and your wicked nails digging into his shoulders, the more you tugged on his curls, the more luke thought: maybe.
maybe you would give into your seething resentment, live up to those eye-rolls and snarky comments that got you in trouble with chiron, on the edge of hot water with the gods. maybe you would join the titan army. maybe, just maybe, this time, you would follow luke.
and yet — maybe wasn’t enough if it meant he could lose this. luke wouldn’t risk it, not until he kissed every battle scar and bruise on your body, and you did the same to his.
“wait.”
it was the last thing luke wanted to do, but he complied. he took the opportunity to appreciate the chaos he created: your shirt in disarray, your lipstick a mess, your chest heaving and desperate to catch a breath.
“i promised jordan that we’d keep up our charade for a week, two at the most. do you think we could keep this…” you tightened your fist around the fabric of his shirt. “a secret until then?”
luke responded by pressing his lips to yours once more, because there were definitely worse secrets to keep.
(vii. you wouldn’t hesitate to make him bleed)
luke had just left percy jackson to die.
he should be leaving camp, now, but he needed to see you one last time.
the universe works in mysterious ways, because you were out on a run through the forest, and you crossed paths before he even had time to wonder where you were.
“hey, tiger.” you smiled as if this was a regular afternoon. the two of you would teach your afternoon activities, sneak away during dinner so luke could kiss you in that spot that made you gasp. “wanna join me? i was just wrapping up, but i could be convinced to go longer.”
for a second, he was tempted to. very tempted.
“i don’t have much time.”
you seemed to notice luke’s sullen mood and you dropped your playful demeanor.
luke explained: the messages from kronos in his dreams, him stealing the lightning bolt and helm of darkness to start a war between the gods and framing percy. the plan to destroy olympus that luke had pledged his life to.
percy was surprised at what luke had done, and luke could imagine that the rest of camp would be, too. luke was the golden boy of camp half-blood, everyone’s big brother.
you, on the other hand, didn’t express any sense of shock.
“luke.” you said his name like you weren’t quite sure it was poison. “i’m going to give you five seconds to tell me that you’re joking.”
five seconds of silence passed. you took a few steps back from luke.
“i….i should have told you sooner.”
“yeah,” you scoffed. “you should have. but, you didn’t. did it feel good, having the titan king whispering sweet nothings in your ear? all the lies about how this war is the only way to get the glory you so desperately want? it’s fucking delusional.”
“it’s not delusional—”
“yes, it is!” you glared at him. “you’re on the wrong side of a war you made the mistake of starting.”
luke straightened his posture, thinking about how hypocritical you were being.
“isn’t this what you’re all about? revenge, karma. your mom will probably join us, too. don’t you want to see the gods finally get what they deserve?”
“not like this. i can’t believe how desperate you are, to believe that kronos is going to make everything right. it’s pathetic,” you spat. “i’m not saying the gods don’t deserve to be taken down a notch. their fucking obsession with power and glory….it’s sick and twisted, but i don’t think your titan king is any better. i don’t think you are any better.”
“it’s time that the gods fall. this is the only way, even if it isn’t perfect,” luke countered. his voice was firmer now as he absorbed your anger. your mother was the goddess of revenge, but you clearly didn't understand the sacrifices, pain, and blood that was required to make the world a better place.
luke just needed to convince you.
“we’ve talked about this for years,” he continued. “nothing is balanced! there’s no justice here, for anyone. we can build a better world where we don’t have to burn our scraps and throw ourselves at monsters to get attention. we can fight together like we always have. y/n, i love—”
“don’t,” you snapped. “don’t you fucking dare. you should have died on your quest.” your voice laced with venom. one hand gripping the knife you always kept on your belt. “that dragon should have fucking sliced through you and saved us all the trouble.”
something pricked in the back of his throat, down to his stomach.
“you don’t mean that.”
“i do,” you promised. “at least you would have died with all of us thinking you’re a hero instead of the traitor you really are.”
you grabbed your knife, took a fighting stance.
“i’m not going to fight you,” was all luke could say. he noticed your hand tremble, and you tightened the grip on your knife to prevent emotion from slipping through your invisible armor.
in that moment, you have could slice through luke, and it would hurt less than everything you just said, less than the murderous look you were giving him, like he was just another monster you wouldn’t think twice about sending to tartarus.
luke didn’t even have a chance to unsheathe his sword before you charged at him, but he quickly had you pinned to the ground, the tip of your own knife pointed at you. he hesitated. the blade pressed harder against your cheek than he intended, enough to break the skin and let a few droplets of dark crimson escape.
“please come with me,” he pleaded. you didn’t answer, but you did seem surprised by the softness of his voice.
a few moments passed, the celestial bronze still between you. luke waited for you to see his way, to yield to his proposal.
you didn’t. instead, you took advantage of the situation. you wrapped your leg around his and flipped your position. in the process, you regained possession of your knife. without the hesitation that held luke back, you sliced through his cheek, deep. luke bit his lip to suppress a groan, tasting blood. your gaze set his whole body on fire as he waited for your next move. that was when you glanced down at his camp necklace, and the new clay bead added to commemorate this summer.
a turquoise trident.
“percy told me he was on his way to see you,” you realized. “what did you do?”
luke didn’t answer. he knew then that a choice ran through your head.
and it stung, just a little, watching you sprint away through the trees in a last ditch effort to save percy’s life.
there was a small, pathetic part of luke that wanted you to choose him, even if it meant you would have plunged the knife into his chest.
#this is my baby fr#really feeling the tragic hero vibe down to my core#will prob do a part 2 from reader's POV!#ofc inspired by get him back! bc nemesis!reader....#percy jackson#pjo fanfic#pjo series#luke castellan#luke castellan x you#luke castellan x reader#pjo x reader#luke castellan angst#luke castellan imagine#percy jackson and the olympians#luke castellan smut#saf writes#Spotify
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In trouble again? - Sturniolo little sister oneshot
warnings - swearing, fluff, arguing
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Quick backstory behind this oneshot:
When Y/n was 14, her 19 year old older triplet brothers moved to LA. Upsetting her for a while, hard not seeing them around the house.
But after a lot of convincing, when Y/n turned 15, Marylou and Jimmy agreed to let her move in with them.
Obviously, nick, chris, and matt were okay with it.
You may wonder how a girl fit in with three boys, well it was easy for her.
Nick was the one she’d go too for boys, about her period (since he bought her pads and what she needed when she was on it), she'd go to Nick about a breakup, literally about anything that Matt and Chris would freak out about if she told them.
Then Chris was the one she’d go to if she needed too laugh, needed a hug, (chris gives really good ones), He always found a way too make her laugh, even when she was crying. Although when y/n was crying chris usually got emotional with her, so they cried and laughed together.
Now Matt, matt was the one she’d go too for a lot of things. Anxiety was a big one, she had a lot, so she usually asked for tips and stuff. Y/n also gets frustrated, annoyed, anything negative really easily, (like matt) so she usually went to Matt to calm down and take a breath. Y/n also usually slept with Matt, much like chris she hated sleeping alone, so she usually slept with, matt, but occasionally with math and chris because chris was usually found in matt’s bed.
Y/n also gets in trouble at school a lot! (Bad y/n)
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2:03pm
I walked inside my house with yet another write up i got this week, it's only thursday and this is my third write up this week, (new record by the way) this time was for yelling at my math teacher how she didn't know how to teach. She seriously doesn't because if she did would not have a D- in her class right now.
"Is anyone home?" I yelled out, kicking my shoes off and throwing my bag down.
I see Nick walk downstairs, "Hey y/n!" He says cheerfully, "Matt and Chris went to return the jeans you didn't like and Chris wanted to go to get a new sweatshirt or something." Nick smiled before his eyes trail down to my hand. He let's out a sigh, "Y/n...Please tell me.." He trails off, his voice filled with disapointment.
I look down at the paper too, "Umm.." I clear my throat, "Sorry I thought they would've called or at least texted you guys already. My bad. Now can you please sign it before Matt gets home?" I pleaded, handing the paper to Nick for him to sign. Matt was the worst one for when i got in trouble, he changes a lot. He's like all sweet and then his face gets red with anger. It's scary.
Nick took the paper and grabbed a pen from the kitchen table, "I'll sign it, but they took Matt's number down. So there is no doubt he got that call or text." Nick says, signing the paper with his signature like it said too do. I let out a groan as nicks eyes glanced over the quick explanation of what happened.
"You went off on your math teacher?" Nick scoffed.
"I already told Ms.Reel I don't play! She kept testing me, literally and figuratively. She tried givin' me a pop quiz like I was 'bouta do all that. Yeah no thanks." I defended. Grabbing a water from the fridge and sitting down at the island.
"What exactly did you say, n/n?" Nick asked, giving me the now signed paper.
"All i said was, 'I'm not doing this.' and when she asked why I said 'because why would i take a pop quiz from a teacher that teaches like she graduated at the university of nowhere.' and when she told me to go to the office i said, 'gladly, i'd rather have 6 months of detention then ever come back too this bootlegged not teachin us nothin' classroom. And then i got kicked out." I explained.
Matt signed the one i got on monday for going off on a girl for making fun of my friend. He told me it was okay and that i was sticking up for somebody i cared about.
The one i got on tuesday was for walking out of the classroom when my science teacher didn’t let me go to the bathroom but let a boy out when he asked. Chris signed that one for me, Matt found out about it, i didn’t know they had his number, he was upset but he said as long as i didn’t get another one it’s fine.
So after this one i am definitely getting yelled at by Matt.
The front door opens and i hear muttering, sounding like bickering.
“Wait, i left my jacket in the car, can you go get it?” I hear Chris ask Matt.
I then hear Matt mutter something along the lines of, “You fucking idiot” before walking away.
Chris then speed walks into the kitchen, “Y/n, you seriously messed up. Matt was already in a bad mood since he woke up, and then at the mall workers were giving him shit for trying to return your jeans without the tags on them, and then he got a call about how you got in trouble. So you’re actually fucked.”
My eyes widened, “Um- yeah i’m just gonna go up-” I start to walk away but bump into Matt.
“Just the person i was looking for!” Matt says. sarcastically, his arms crossing as he stands in front of me.
“Go sit, now.” He demands. I rub my forehead and nod, sitting at the kitchen table.
Matt sits down next to me and grabs the write up slip, “Nick signed it already? That’s great.” Matt continues with the sarcasm.
“Don’t bring me into this!” Nick puts his hands up in defense as him and Chris are watching us.
Matt then gives nick and chris a look that makes them both go to their rooms.
Great.
I take a breath in before starting to talk as Matt reads the write up slip, “So on a scale of 1-10 how mad-”
“Don’t even finish that sentence, y/n.” He grits out.
I nod and bite my lip, i’m really fucking scared.
“You can’t- why would you- who even- where- what- the fuck!?” Matt stutters.
“I don’t even know what to say, y/n! This is the third one this week! It’s thursday! There are only five days in a school week! It shouldn’t be this hard to stay out of trouble!” Matt yells.
“I’m sorry i just-” I get cut off.
“No! You don’t just do anything, you can’t just do something like this and keep getting away with it. You don’t need to be acting like this.” Matt says, putting his head in his hands.
“I also don’t need your opinion, i mean why are you even getting so mad? Nick and Chris don’t care this much.” I say, nice going y/n.
Matt scoffs. “Go to your room.”
“But-”
“Now!” He yells.
“Whatever!” I scoff and get up, literally stomping to my room.
—————————
10:16pm
It’s been 8 whole hours since i last talked to Matt.
Which was crazy, Nick and Chris came in to ask me how i was doing but i just shrugged, i got to keep my phone so i was doing alright.
I get another knock on my door, expecting it to be Matt, i quickly say, “Come in!” But it’s Chris. I love him but i lay back down, scrolling on my phone.
He walks up and sits on my bed, rubbing my shoulder.
“I think you should talk to Matt.” Chris says, his voice soft and welcoming.
“He doesn’t wanna talk to me. He’s made it clear, we haven’t talked since the argument.” I sniffle, i was so upset.
“He does wanna talk to you, but he’s stubborn also, so he is not gonna be the first one to say something. If you go and apologize, and really mean it, like not just go in there because i told you too, then he will appreciate it and say sorry too. I promise.” Chris says as i sit up.
I put my pinky out, “Pinky promise?” I whisper.
He interlocks our pinkies, “Pinky promise.” He confirms.
I nod as he leaves my room, about 5 minutes pass and i decide to get up too.
I knock on Matt’s door, I hear some shuffling before the door starts to open, “Nick how many times-” Matt starts but stops when he sees me.
“N/n.” He says, his voice was much softer.
“Matt- i’m so sorry for getting in trouble and i’m sorry for saying that you get too and and it’s just schools been really hard and i hate it and everyone’s annoying and i don’t know what to do and i-” I sob but get cut off when Matt pulls me in for a tight hug.
“Okay, calm down baby.” He whispers, his fingers going through my hair.
I sob into his chest, that’s all it was. Stress and being overwhelmed.
“Shh..” Matt hushed, bringing me into his room with his arms still wrapped around me, kicking the door shut with his foot and bringing me to sit down on his bed.
“Y/n, listen.” He pulls away from the hug.
“You’re right, i have been harsher than normal, but that’s only because i want you to succeed, you’re in highschool! You are growing up so fast and i want the best for you. And i’m sorry that i’m not the fun one all the time. I’ll try, but if i try you have to promise that you will too, and if you’re ever feeling upset or down that you’ll talk to me.” Matt comforts.
I nod and wipe my nose with my sleeve.
“Can i sleep in here tonight?” I ask.
Matt laughs, “Of course you can.”
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why is this literally the most basic thing i’ve ever written oh lord goodbye idk what happened with me today but im just gonna start dad matt tmr and it will either be done tmr or thursday (i pinky promise) hope yall enjoy this one!
#matt sturniolo#chris sturniolo#nick sturniolo#sturniolo triplets#christopher sturniolo#nicolas sturniolo#spotify#sturniolo#littlesister
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It’s half past midnight as I’m starting this, who knows what time it will be when I finish it, let’s talk: Inej versus the Wraith.
Ok I’ve been thinking a lot about the distinction between Inej and the Wraith as a concept similar to the desperation of Kaz and Dirtyhands or Kaz Brekker and Kaz Rietveld, and I think I’ve noticed an actual trend in the books of using the epithet at certain times or in certain tones. For example, when the group find the pyre in chapter 19/20 and realise one of the victims is still alive, Jesper shoots them to end their pain. Kaz wanted Inej to do it since using her knives would be quieter than the gun, but she can’t bring herself to. In this moment, she is described exclusively as “Inej”. Later in chapter 20 she kills a parem-drugged fabrikator in order to save their lives, and is described as “the Wraith”. Not only is there the suggestion of a growing distinction between the two, but it is now being noticed by the characters as well as just the reader. For Kaz it’s really only the reader (and maybe Inej but I’d argue not to a full extent until Crooked Kingdom) who sees this distinction because we are closer to him than he lets anyone else get, we are the only people who really know what he’s thinking and see the two sides of his personality or the two potentials for who he could be. But with Inej it’s almost the exact opposite, we as the reader see the idea of the Wraith as an epithet invented by Kaz and an as empowering epithet designed to counter the dehumanising “Lynx” whilst still echoing the trauma of her past by linking very clearly to Inej’s descriptions of leaving her body behind and thinking “I’m already dead, I died in the hold of a slaver ship”, whilst the characters begin to almost refer to the Wraith and Inej as separate entities. I’m using Jesper as my example here since he’s the one to calll her the Wraith in chapter 20 - “trust the Wraith” - and the one to shoot the dying Grisha at the pyre, both to spare them and her from pain. It seems a sudden turnabout to go from a non-verbal or even any kind of communicatory acknowledgment that he needs to step in for her to expecting, trusting, and praising her for killing, but arguably that’s because he has seen a change in her during this short period of time.
It’s also worth noting that Nina almost always calls her Inej, in fact I don’t think she once calls her Wraith (at least to my immediate recollection, feel free to correct me) except when she uses the name to call Kaz out when he says “the Wraith can handle it” and she replies “the Wraith is a 16-year-old girl” and goes on to emphasise Inej’s injuries. But even in this scene, which is on the boat to Fjerda when it’s still unclear whether Inej will even survive and Kaz is talking about making her climb up the incinerator shaft at the Ice Court, Nina begins the conversation by saying Kaz can’t make Inej do that, and he comes back with “the Wraith can manage”. This suggests he sees a distinction between them as well, perhaps that Inej is a religious young woman who’s been left incredibly vulnerable but the Wraith is a hardened criminal with nothing to lose. By choosing to refer to her as the Wraith when he plans to put her through something so incredibly difficult, he is alleviating himself from the guilt of harming a vulnerable young woman by instead considering her as a hardened criminal. Nina calling him out in this shit (yeah I said it and I stand by it) clearly annoys Kaz or he wouldn’t have bothered arguing back to her, as he usually doesn’t. Arguably we could extend this to the idea that the others call her Inej when she’s the person they know and care about but the Wraith when she’s violent or commits crimes so they can actively choose to separate the image of warm, kind-hearted Inej from cruel or calculating Wraith.
Now everything I’ve said so far really comes down to perception so in terms of analysis it’s the kind of thing that you can say confidently and have accepted as accurate or at least as a reasonable interpretation, like when critics tell you that the dream sequence in Frankenstein can mean on of the following 5 things so you agree with them because they clearly know what they’re talking about. (Not that I’m saying the dream doesn’t mean one of those 5 things it can definitely be interpreted in those ways, it’s just an example of something in literature I’ve seen we kind of take as fact when it is, of course, all yo for interpretation). However, I want to be clear that what I’m going to say from now on can be considered a possible theory or interpretation of Inej surrounding her mental state and ptsd response. I’ve talked about it recently as part of other posts and I’m basically about to repeat myself word for word, but I wanted to compress this all into one post on the theme and include the stuff about the characters actually perceiving her that way too.
So first you we have a quote from the Crooked Kingdom Bathroom Scene™️, and what I’m going to say here is pretty much going to be exactly the same as what I wrote in my detailed breakdown and analysis of that scene, which if anyone wants to read is on my page or I can tag you if you’d like. The quote I want to talk about is: “I live in fear that I’ll see one of her - one of my clients on the street. For a while I thought I saw them everywhere”. Now I’m about to say there are 2 was to read this, but I mean this in a “I’ve read this is in two different ways” kinda way not in a “this can only be interpreted in these 2 ways” kinda way ok we’re embracing the de-classicising of literature here (I have no idea if that’s the right word or if that even makes sense but hopefully you know what I mean, I’m tired, bare with me) and we are open to any and all possible interpretations of things in any way they’re written so whooo if you read this quote in a different way let me know would love to hear it, these are the two ways I read it:
Firstly, that when she refers to “her” Inej means Heleen but edits her words as a continuation of this vulnerability she is forcing herself to share in this scene. If we exclude her being vulnerable with the reader, this is the most vulnerable we ever see Inej make herself - aka, this is the only time she allows herself to be deeply vulnerable out loud with another character. I think this closest other time we get is with Nina on the boat to Fjerda when Inej is trying to ward of flashbacks and she tells Nina why she doesn’t have the Crow Cup tattoo. However, that scene is written from Inej’s perspective and therefore gives her the opportunity to show the reader a lot more vulnerability than she shows Nina (eg when she has flashbacks the reader knows but Nina doesn’t because Inej is just egging her on to keep singing and distracting her; Nina knows something is happening but she isn’t being brought into the moment to share it because Inej isn’t in a position where she’s able to share her vulnerability) so our memory of this scene being particularly vulnerable is actually more about Inej being very honest with us, which of course isn’t an active choice, and less about her being very honest with Nina. Having the Bathroom Scene ™️ from Kaz’s perspective gives us the opportunity to have Inej’s openness and vulnerability in the scene far stronger since she has to say something out loud for us to know with certainty that she’s thinking it. Arguably if it had been a less vulnerable scene, Inej would have said “her clients” in reference two Tante Heleen as an added layer of the separation she practices, but here she changes it to “my” clients because she is forcing herself to be uncomfortable because she wants to be able to be more open with Kaz and she wants to continue this vulnerability that she’s allowing herself ti have with him. I feel like I just some variation on vulnerable like 20 times.
The second way I read it is linking back to our main theme of Inej and the Wraith as separate entities. “Inej talks a lot about how she would leave her body behind to exist only in her mind, in passages I find particularly reminiscent of passages in The Handmaid’s Tale (although please note soc is not very explicit whereas tht is incredibly explicit). But to take that idea further, I think there are certain hints, and I think this is possibly the biggest one, to imply that one of Inej’s ptsd responses it to actually view herself today as a separate entity from who she was during her indenture, effectively saying ‘yes these things happened to this body but they didn’t happen to this mind so that should make it easier’ to herself, which is massively self-destructive in nature because it almost creates this idea that she needs to get over who she once was and move on, very similar to the way Kaz Brekker represses Kaz Rietveld. Arguably, what she’s saying is the worst of it is this fracturing of the self that has been created by what they put her through and that she cannot seem to escape from.” (I put that bit in quote marks because I didn’t feel like rewriting it so that’s copy and pasted exactly from my Bathroom Scene™️ analysis post)
Ok there’s one other specific quote I want to bring up and it’s the end of Chapter 2 of Six of Crows, I did talk about it in my favourite quotes analysis of the chapter (which I am planning to continue btw chapter 5 up next if anyone wants to read these posts for the previous chapters let me know and I’ll tag you).
"Inej pitied the boy who might die alone with no one to comfort him in his last hours or who might live and spend his life as an exile. But the night's work wasn't over yet, and the Wraith didn't have time for traitors"
This I think, unless there are more I haven’t noticed/thought of yet is the only other time we get an suggestion of Inej perceiving herself and the Wraith as separate, and it’s arguably more concrete than the amendment of pronouns I just talked about for a ridiculous amount of time. To me, this quote shows Inej as being the girl she was, the girl she should have been, and the Wraith being a creation of necessity to aid survival. Inej is a religious young woman from Ravka who has been through far more than she should have done, but the Wraith was born and raised on the blood-soaked streets of Ketterdam and has every intention of surviving them - no matter the cost.
(That was also pretty much direct quotes from what said before)
It is now quarter past one in the morning. If you made it this far then thanks so much for reading I hope it made sense and was interesting, I feel like I’ve made enough “me rambling about grishaverse after midnight” posts that we can call it a series so if I think of a good name for it I’ll go through a tag them all so if anyone fancies trying to wade through all my middle-of-the-night-analysis nonsense you can find it all together because let me tell you something I never quite acknowledge just how much I’ve posted until I have to scroll back through to find stuff I’ve said in order to reference it in a new post. Anyway, thanks for reading I hope you enjoyed and if you have any thoughts linked to this or grishaverse analysis in general please comment or send me an ask I would love to hear it.
EDIT: sorry, correction, I just realised Inej didn’t kill the parem-drugged fabrikator she killed the parem-drugged squaller; the fabrikator was Nina’s childhood friend Nestor, he died from a combination of injury and the drug
#grishaverse#six of crows#leigh bardugo#crooked kingdom#inej ghafa#kaz brekker#nina zenik#jesper fahey#wylan van eck#matthias helvar#kanej#kanej bathroom scene#sankta inej#soc inej#six of crows inej#i love inej#the wraith#inej my beloved#inej supremacy
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(writing this first story of mine, for me specifically, to experience my own fantasy)
My name's aaron
Im in my 3rd year of highschool, I'm 19 years old, long hair, ace, nothing going for myself, not exactly bullied, not exactly popular, just Invisible most of the time, sitting alone and watching the masses, Im not a fan of school either, math can suck ass, and everything else is annoying, for years I look upon the popular seniors, all so hot, all so popular, when ever I was noticed, they would talk to me , they are so kind, the jocks in the group are nice to, although they are very horny, since I'm older, I never played sports, I was a protected child, but I always fantasize about playing football, to be a jock, iv loved the look of muscles, cleats, beer, iv jacked off to many pictures, to fuel my insecurities, maybe one day I could fit in, oh how I wish to be one of them
I said this under my breath, just so I could hear it, to calm me , I sigh and go back to listening to music to wait for my next clas
Without me knowing it, one of the jocks (Jason) ended up vaguely hearing me from close by, mostly the part about I wish I could be a jock, muscles , beer...,
He has a blank but grinning smirk, he gathers his other jock bros and rushes to coach, coach is an eccentric man, large muscles and gym lesson workouts that leave the students in pain for days.
Jason tells coach about what he heard , coach has a evil grin with his hand rubbing together,
"jason- bring him... to me"
"yes coach"
While I wait for my next class, listening to music, I see Jason and his buddies come up to me, I'm kinda shocked and happy someone acknowledged me, wonder what they want
I look up at Jason making eye contact.
"What up Aaron, my bro, coach would like to see you*
I'm visibly confused
"me? Why?"
"nothing bad, your gonna like this"
" eh, ok, what's the worst that can happen"
"ALL RIGHT LETS GOO" jason and his buddies are cheering,
In my head I think, why are they so happy xd, I wonder what could be happening, I hope Its nothing about how I skipped gym class last week,
I enter coaches office-
I say - " yes coach, you wanted to see me?"
-" yes I did, come sit over hear"
I sit across from him, taking note of the musk in the room, an intoxicating smell to say the least.
We make eye contact
"soo Aaron, I hear you want to be a jock"
Shock runs through me,
"wait what?, But how?"
"my boy Jason told me, a friend of yours I asume?"
"well I wouldn't say "friend" but we have talked in the past"
My heart's racing , breathing faster, the smell in the air ain't helping either, but I am getting hard under my trousers.
In coaches mind" don't worry my boy, Jason and the others will soon be your best BRO'S"
"now what do you say Aaron?, Want to join us?, To become a jock, I can teach you everything like your my son"
I'm a little scared, but also excited, like what the fuck is going on rn?
"umm .. y yeah , sure, I wouldn't mind coach..."
Coach smiles,
"well answered, hear, for starters, drink this son"
Son?, He hands me a can of beer,
"go on, drink, it's a staple jock drink"
Shaking, I click open the can and start of sip , gulp , and then slowly down the drink,
"how do u feal Aaron, anything different?"
"well idk, besides me being hard as a rock and sweating hard, maybe a little tipsy, I don't drink all that often_ I start to drool a little
In coaches mind he says ( well it's sure working fast I'd say, he wants this, so there's no resistance, soon he will be drinking all the time), coach smirks
"Well come with me son, leave your things, you won't be needing them, and don't worry about your next classes, iv got you covered"
I leave my jacket, and bag behind, as I get up, I feel dizzy, but a happy dizzy, Jason takes hold of me
" you good lil bro?, Don't worry, things will bet better"
lil bro ? I think, hah,sounds cool
"yeah thanks Jason, I owe you... Big bro"
Jason smiles ,
He's my big bro hehe, drool keeps coming from my lips, my head is dizzy
I'm moved into the locker room, coach orders Jason to put me down on one of the benches facing a TV, usually used to watch the game
"Jason, help Aaron undress"
"yes coach"
I become undressed, my top, my trousers, my boxers are soaked in pre ,and my hard cock is a sight to see,
Drool keeps coming
"Alright Jason, sit next to him, while I set this up"
Jason and his bros sit next to me ..
A video starts to play, Jason holding me up, as I stare at the screan.
Jason Whispers into my ear" don't worry lil bro, master coach and I hear for you" with a big dumb smile,
I continue to drool in a dazed state, my cock rock hard and leaking a fountain of pre
I stare at the video
Coach comes out of the back with a football kit, cleats, jock strap, pads, and a helmet,
"now stare Aaron, stare, become who you wish to be me, who's your meant to be,
A dumb jock"
I , Jason and the bros start to laugh, as we all stare at the screen, we are all hard, but I'm the most affected, seems they have been through this already,
"what do u wish you Aaron?"
Slobly I say
"dumb... Jock.... To becum...beer..... Bros.... Muscles ...... Football..... Wish.... I am dum , I obsy, I .... I must obey, .... I jock bro.... Bro.... Cum."
Coach grins- "good boy, now who do you obey?"
"i..,..I obay....yoouoou.... ... Master coach"
"and what are you?"
"a... Dumbbro... Jock..."
"good boy my son, we are almost done here, stand up boy, don't look away from the screen
I sand up, my bro Jason holding me steady
Coach then dresses me up in the kit, all soaked in something that soon my skin soaks up
It's all too big for me, but then,
My muscles are , my body, they are growing, my stomach hardens into 6 pack abs, my triceps and bi ceps , my arms are inflating and hardening with pure muscle, my hands beef up with hardened fingers from years in the gym and the field, my neck thickens and chest widens with huge hard nipples, my legs thicken and elongate , tree trunk muscle legs form, my feet expand, grow , while my hardened dick, grows longer, harder, leaking even more, a 12 inch monster , my body start to stink,
The kit starts to fit against me, tight, the cleats feel snug and the gloves give energy, my body fully soaked the liquid from before , coach stands back holding the helmet
"good boy Aaron, now recite the screens words, submit to me, to your new life
My thoughts are changing, my memory fading, changing, I recite the screens words..
"I am a jock,
I am a jock, I am a jock
I am a bro, a jock, a dumb
A dumb jock bro, football
I must obey coach, I am a jock, football jock , I m obedient, I am dumb , I am a bro , I am A dumb
Football jock...."
"who do you obey"
"I obey you coach"
With that, coach places the helmet on my head
My mind stops, I go blank, my memories reshape,
I am a dumb jock, I am a bro, quarterback of the team, Jason and the other bros have been my bros for years, we love sucking each others dicks, no homo bro, only us men know how to to work a dick, better than any chick,, Jason is my big bro, we workout, we get drunk together,, we obey
We obey master coach
Coach then pays attention to my hard leaking jock, were all my old memories are in the lemon sizes ball churning with new jock cum
"sit down boy" I sit down to coaches orders, Jason and others relax against me, we are all about to burst
Coach starts to jack me off, I start to grunt in a deep voice.
"good... Good boy Aaron , good jock boy , relax, let it sink in, you are dumb jock my son, your dreams have been fulfilled, who do you thank?"
" I thank you coach"
" good boy... Now CUM"
We all moan and grunt as cum, CUM , rods of cum shoot out all over us, puddles of cum stain our Kits, the walls, the bench, some got on to coach , he licks it off of him.
Coach lets go of my cum covered dick, and pushes it back into the cup jock strap, then tightens the tight football leggings to complete it
My huge muscled body sits,against the wall,
"stand up Aaron my son"
My head starts to clear, thinking only of beer, cock, coach football, the bros, football.... . muscles. Working out... Beer..
Me , Jason and my bros stand up
"yes coach? My dick still hard , ready for more , very horny
" we are gonna do some training for the game, Jason and the others , go, your bro Aaron needs his picture taken for the year book.
"Yes coach!, Hehe, welcome to the team lil bro, we'll be waiting outside , Jason bro bumps my back,
_" see you there big bro"
"stand over hear Aaron my son"
"yes coach"
Click, the pictures are taken
As the flashing light fades, my dick explodes once again, cum pooling in the jock cup,
I am a dum football jock.
" run off to practice boy, ill meet the team there,
"YES COACH"
I run to the field, my loud steps echoing
Coach takes one last pic of me on the field, to commemorate this special day,
"soon he will be bringing others to me.
So happy to make Aaron's dreams come true"
Coach runs to the field, proud , ready to get us to the championship games
" ALRIGHT BOYS, 6 laps, GO, there's beers waiting for ya"
____________________________
The end, ahhhh , the dream... Atleast I made it come true in writing xd
If anyone sees this, what do you think?
I sure enjoyed my first story
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rain code age headcanons because i have literally only ever been choosing ages based on what's funniest but now i wanna cast away my grand layers of irony and be genuine for a moment. also. this goes pretty in depth so be prepped for the long haul when you click read more lmao.
spoilers for the whole game below and it's because of one specific character iykyk
Yakou - this man has the soul of a guy in his late 40s going through what would be his midlife crisis if not for the fact that he's fully aware he passed the midpoint years ago. but that soul is trapped in the body of a guy who doesnt look a day older than 28. what moisturizer does he use? i doubt he even uses anything other than that 13 in 1 shampoo. anyway, i think he's 32.
Halara - 26. nothing really to justify this other than they've got that mid 20s swag but 25 didn't feel right. adult enough to be as competent as they are yet young enough to look like that. moving on.
Desuhiko - 19. i think he's the youngest of the NDA because. well. idk man have you read his dialogue? he's got a whole lot of growing to do and is still very lost on his direction in life. he's giving 'bitch fresh outta high school (or in this case, detective training) and relishing in his freshly obtained freedom."
Vivia - 28? yeah i got nothing for this i am going purely on vibes here. 28 just feels right.
Fubuki - 23. she's clearly still a bit young but is also clearly a grown ass adult who wasn't raised right so i think this makes for a happy medium, especially if she's already been on some worldwide adventures n shit before the game. works out quite swimmingly methinks.
Kurumi - 18. for my personal comfort bc we'll get to yuma later but im not gonna sit here and ignore the way the game constantly grovels at the audience's feet to ship them so id rather she not be any younger than this. anyway, more about her: she tends to hold her own as an informant with more competence, maturity, and effecience than most of the NDA. but she also has a pretty childish black and white view on things, like believing her beloved detectives are always right (girl if you were real you would be ENTRENCHED in stan culture oml do NOT get into minecraft youtubers) but i've... seen 18 year olds on the internet that are exactly the same so whatever
Aetheria girls - putting them all at 17-18 because, based on honorifics, they are treated as upperclassmen by their peers in the Japanese dub. i think waruna is the youngest and kurane is the eldest.
Yomi - 25. he has that vibe. old enough to be taken seriously as an adult but young enough to act like That™. yknow?
Martina - 32. she's giving older woman sexy librarian vibes and generally carries herself with a certain level of poise and maturity but is also a freak in a way that can best be explained by being a woman in her 30s. not elaborating on this
Swank - 41. to me he's like those awful surly businessmen who go to cabaret clubs to drink and smoke their office job woes away and cheat on their wives. but he also has extreme mafia boss swag about it so i kinda love him for that. dunno what this has to do with age tho. moving on.
Seth - 22 because he's giving youngest brother. i think he's the youngest of the peacekeepers in general. guillaume definitely bullies him about this.
Dominic - 34. bro is built like a jojo character what else do you want me to say. he's still got that youthfulness about him that makes me think he's still not going through his midlife crisis, so i wouldn't place him any older
Guillaume - 23. guillaume is so girlypop manic pixie dream girl core that she's definitely got the energy of someone who is young but also strikes the balance of being someone who has a job and a mortgage. dunno how she does it. id like to think she isnt even much older than seth but still bullies him for being the baby of the peacekeepers. do u understand my vision. please. they have so much annoying coworker potential.
shinigami - idk like 1000. she's a death god who cares.
yuma - okay. yeah. look i dont give a singular fuck about age discourse- headcanon whatever you want- but from looking at canon material i genuinely think that he could not possibly be any younger than 21. 20 if we wanna push it. yes, i know he looks young. i have eyes. but also, im in my 20s and the most common thing people tell me when i reveal my age is "oh, i thought you were 15." one time a person asked me if i was 12. at my job. that i was actively working at. i was 20. adults can look young, and contrary to the classic 1000 year old loli dragon trope he doesnt act overtly childish. he acts like a normal fuckin guy. yes he cries but like. you wouldn't in his position? bro speedruns lifelong trauma so skillfully that he's backwards long jumping into alternate universes where everything is somehow worse. i'd be freaked out if he didn't cry. also im aware that the child prodigy detective trope is a thing and that kodaka has written that before but... he was number one three years ago. and the training takes two years. which means, if he is a minor in the game's present day, he started working at the WDO at 12 and became number one at 14... at the oldest. have you ever met a 14 year old? forgive me for not suspending my disbelief here. and really the kicker for me is that yuma has a line where he says he's not sure if he's drinking age (which would be 20 in japan), but you know who would be sure? you know who knows yuma's age better than yuma?
makoto kagutsuchi - this megacorporation CEO has a fully stocked minibar installed in his penthouse. <- sentence i cannot bring myself to believe if it's about a child. since i also cant picture him becoming CEO at age 14 without yomi at least once angrily pointing that out (he only ever mentions that makoto is an outsider, or has his head in the clouds), id like to think both him and yuma, at their youngest, earned their top spots at their respective organizations at 18. it keeps their gifted kid syndrome and young prodigy-ness without making things comically ridiculous or uncomfortable for the sheer amount of sexual situations yuma gets put into.
anyway that's my silly little ramble on age headcanons. this was actually really fun to think about. shoutout to kodaka for leaving out the ages. funniest choice he could've made
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Spinning Jon Sims in my head again. Everyone talks about the "yeah I was bullied cause I was a deeply annoying child" but. The way he follows the deeply annoying child bit with "he was over my twice my age, so I'm certainly not excusing it" is said in such a way that I'm like. He definitely mentioned his childhood bully offhandedly to Georgie at some point and justified it with "yeah haha I was just really annoying" and she went "that guy was an adult bullying an 8 year old what do you mean you were just annoying" and he hated that whole conversation so he just said "yeah okay I'm not excusing his bullying" but he absolutely still does think it was his fault for being annoying.
And he keeps downplaying it, too. He says "more than twice my age" which is true and sounds bad but not as bad as "a decade older than me and also legally an adult", especially with how casual he is about it. And "Name calling, the odd beating, sometimes stealing from me— all very standard" JON ARE WE JUST GOING TO BRUSH PAST THE FACT THAT YOU GOT BEAT UP BY A 19 YEAR OLD AT THE AGE OF 8. We just brush past it!!
I'm meant to be packing but I really want to just write an essay on how Jon's childhood (and more importantly, his perception of it) impacted his feelings and actions over the course of the series. Like, of course Jonathan "yeah I had a traumatic childhood but my grandmother tried her best and I was annoying so it's actually all fine" Sims blames himself for every problem ever and thinks he deserves pain and suffering about it. Shaking him. Please for the love of god get therapy about that
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I was going through some posts I missed and came across the “tatsumi is mature but still does 19 year old things” and I just wanna say I’ve never been able to put it into words when my friends ask but like. That’s exactly what I love about this game.
We’ve got scandals and drama and weird crypto currencies and convoluted backstories of implied murder or identity theft or military shit or relations to underground gang activity or so SO much more and yet the writers still succeed in reminding you that this is a game full of high schoolers.
Natume was one of the five oddballs and suffered through so much during the war where it affects him to this day, but he also refers to his tech savvy and love of the occult as magic and loves the junior he “adopted” to death. Despite Aira struggling against every odd to become a real idol he still buys merch and looks on the internet to look for content of the ones he likes. Rinne was destined to become the monarch of his homeland but ran away in an attempt to find happiness and acceptance and is an amazing strategist who uses it to take down corruption, but his sense of humor is entirely made up of sex jokes and romantic teasing like Aira being “hiiro’s little girlfriend”. The amount of characters that assign themselves the mom friend role just because. Trickstar. I don’t think I need to explain Trickstar-
Like this game has made me cry so many times and it has its ridiculous moments but it also has its genuine ones while also being the most teenage shit I’ve seen in my life and I feel like so few media can balance those and still have a decent story like that. Sorry for the long ass post I just have so many feelings about this kind of stuff 😭
YEAH this is exactly what i was talking about in a previous ask when i said i have nothing meaningful to add to the enstars cast that isnt a headcanon . its all very well thought out and the interpersonal relationships are nuanced enough to feel realistic but outlandish enough to be interesting .
worldbuilding and character design is one of my special interests and i say this any chance i can get: the most important part of building a character (and a story in general) is realizing the importance of comedic irony and comedy as a whole regardless of genre or tone. it makes characters feel more 3 dimensional and relatable because people arent stagnant and theres multiple facets to any individuals personality (this is also why some of the most popular animes of all time have filler episodes or funny bits that show the characters personalities, every event hits with 3x emotional impact the more you know about the characters as people but that's a different discussion) enstars does a really good job of this . like for example if wataru were to have had a realistic reaction to eichi starting the war it wouldnt be nearly as good of a story. the fact that eichis ridiculous ass backwards plan to get wataru to fall in love with him actually worked is a perfect example of comedy used to make a story more interesting. another thing similar to this is how sometimes its better to not detail something and let characters do things for a mundane reason or even no reason at all . for example subaru hating chiaki just because he annoys him, or shinobu being on the broadcasting team despite his character not being associated with technology otherwise and therefore having no real backstory on why he likes radio stuff. its all really well planned worldbuilding with an insane amount of subtle details , which is why enstars is one of my favorite stories to analyze . the only thing i could possibly want more out of it is hardcore tragedy but thats entirely a personal preference rather than a critique because im a slut for catharsis and i love sad endings , especially ones where characters die . (don't worry im in therapy)
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Royal Love +epilogue 👑❤️
Summary: M'baku is a 19 year old prince who will soon take the throne of jabariland. His father has arranged a marriage for him as it has been a tradition for years but, Mbaku is not happy. One day he meets a stunning girl named y/n and his life changes in the blink of an eye.
Mbaku Pov🤎:
I was awakened by the voice of my two guards Amina and Imani. "My prince, wake up. We have very important things scheduled for today." Amina said. "I've already sent for your breakfast to be prepared. It should be done by the time you finish getting ready." Imani added. "Thank you Amina and Imani." I thanked them. They nodded in response. They left my room so that I could get ready. I brushed my teeth, washed my face, took a shower and got dressed in my royal attire for today. I've just turned 19 only two weeks ago and my father is already hassling me about an arranged marriage. I wish to find my own wife but no matter how many times I bring it up he doesn't listen. I made my way downstairs and ate breakfast with my parents. "Mbaku I've found a wife for you. Her name is princess Sarai from the merchant tribe." my dad told me happily. *here we go again* I thought. "Father I've already told you. I'm not marrying her." I said annoyed. "It's tradition. You're about to become king, no? You can't become king without a wife. "IM NOT MARRYING HER!" I yelled. I'm so angry at my father all he seems to care about is the throne and to him, anything outside of that is irrelevant. "Ay you dare to speak to your father this way eh? The marriage is happening in three days end of discussion." My father spat.
When nightfall came I packed all of my things and brought along food and weapons. I planned to run away from the palace. *i can't be forced to marry someone if I'm not here* I thought.
*timeskip for 1 hour*
By now, I was long gone from my kingdom leaving behind my family, tribe, and the throne. I needed to make a point to my father that he can't control me. I'm 19 I should have the right to make MY own decisions especially when it comes to marriage. It was nightfall when I saw a girl walking through the village. Her s/c( skin color) glistened in the moonlight. Her long locs of hair touched all the way to the middle of her back. "Can I help you?" She asked knocking me out of my trance. "Y-yeah. Can you tell me where I am? I've come from jabariland." I asked her. "Sure. You're in the mahi village which is not too far from the molwheni clan" the mystery girl replied. ( A/N: not sure if that's real it's the first thing I thought of 💀). "Do you have anywhere to stay?" She added. "No. Can you tell me the directions to a place?" I asked. I didn't want to trouble her but I also needed somewhere to stay. "Come." The girl replied while offering her hand. I took it and she led us to a large hut house near a waterfall. "This is my house. If you wish, You may stay here for however long you need. I don't want you going off by yourself this late at night." The girl told me. "Thank you. My name is Mbaku. What's yours?" I asked her. "My name is y/n nice to meet you." Y/n replied. "Nice to meet you as well" I told her. We were getting to know each other and I explained why I'd come here.
Y/n pov✨: i normally don't let people stay with me but Mbaku seems nice and I didn't want him out this late at night. When it gets late it's very dangerous and I wouldn't want him to get hurt. We talked for a little and I learned that he was a prince. We talked and eventually fell asleep.
*timeskip to one week*
Mbaku has been staying here with me for a week now and I enjoy his company. I've always lived alone and it was nice to have someone to talk and spend time with. Unfortunately, he is leaving to go back with his kingdom. I have developed strong feelings for him but I feel its way too early for a relationship at the moment. I helped mbaku pack his things and got ready to walk him out. "Y/n Wait i have to talk to you before I go" he spoke. "I'm listening" I told him. "It's only been a week but it feels like I've known you forever. I have strong feelings for you and you're the only person who has made me feel this much happiness in a long time. Would you like to come back to jabariland with me?" Mbaku spoke. I thought about it for a second while taking everything in. "Yes I'd love to come with you under one condition" I responded. He looked up at me to let me know he was listening. "Can we get to know each other more before any relationship between us? I don't want us to move too fast." I added. "Yes princess anything for you. I need a wife to become king but that is the least of my concern right now. I genuinely want to be with you and Im willing to wait however long it takes until you're ready." Mbaku replied. The both of started to walk back to jabariland as we held hands and talked.
Mbaku Pov🤎:
*Timeskip*
By now y/n and I had made it back to jabariland. She suggested that we both share a room due to her not being familiar with the palace (a/n: y/n didn't want to be by herself) and of course I agreed. While y/n was preparing for bed I went to go speak with my mother. I didn't even want to look at my father let alone speak to him. When it came to marriage and things in general, my mother has always been more understanding than my father. When we talked, I explained to her where I went, why I left, and the reason I didn't want to marry princess Sarai. She understood where I was coming from and she agreed to talk to my father about it. I made my way back to me and y/n's room where I found her already asleep. I took a shower, brushed my teeth and face, and changed into my sleepwear. Afterwards, I got in the bed and snuggled close to y/n and dozed off to sleep.
A/n: i don't feel like putting a bunch of different pov's and time skips and I also didn't wanna leave y'all on a cliffhanger so i wrote a epilogue😭
Epilogue: y/n and mbaku dated for about 2 years and 6 months before they got married. M'baku's mom talked to his dad and after some time he agreed to call off the planned wedding for princess Saraí and mbaku. Instead, mbaku and y:n got married and a bunch of gifts were given to them by the people of their tribe. They received clothes, jewelry, etc. about 6 months after their wedding y/n discovered that she was pregnant. She had birthed one girl and one boy. Mbaku and y/n named them g/n and b/n( girl name and boy name. it can be any name you want btw). Y/n and mbaku both ruled as king and queen until their son b/n became old enough to inherit the throne. Their daughter was next in line but she had chosen to be a warrior instead of a ruler.
A/n: thats it for this imagine but the next one will be about tchalla since I haven't done anything about him yet so stay tuned! Hopefully you enjoyed this imagine and let me know what you would like to see more of, comments, etc.
#black panther#namor x reader#mbaku smut#namor smut#michael b jordan#outer banks#obx season 2#obx season 4#wattpad#jordan calloway#nba youngboy#angela bassett#attuma#jabariland#love triangle#rema#divine ikubor#Nigeria#black love
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20 questions for fic writers
tagged by @thenookienostradamus, quyanaa!
1. How many works do you have on Ao3? 22 :)
2. What’s your total Ao3 word count? 237, 409, yeehaw!
3. What fandoms do you write for? Magic Mike (allegedly), Always Sunny (allegedly), Killer Joe, True Detective (season one, I get too weepy if I think about season four too long but someday!), Midnight Mass, Shadow & Bone, Tell Me Your Secrets, Loki, and I've got an original work snuck in there, too
4. What are your top five fics by kudos?
5. Do you respond to comments? Typically! I have a habit of hoarding my favorites in my inbox so if I take a week or three months to answer you it's because I've been thinking about kissing you on the mouth. Comments really make my day so I do my best to show gratitude to those who take the time to make them.
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Maybe Sinhound? I don't set out to write angst.................. ever, but ending with Mildred's funeral wasn't what I was expecting either.
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? All of them :) I'm a sucker for love and happy endings :)))))
8. Do you get hate on fics? no and that gets more and more shocking each time I post a new work lately as my ao3 becomes a pit of depravity while I work through everything I can't put in my novel manuscript.
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? hell yeah fuck yeah. I like playing in varying degrees of consent, unhealthy or unbalanced dynamics, girls who come too fast and have weird relationships with sex, yada yada. I have a really supportive husband who I am disgustingly, deeply in love with so a lot of genuine warm and fuzzy feelings for one old man in particular generates a lot of material.
10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? I simply don't have the mind processes for it and admire those who can mix media like that.
11. free space / no question here, send me an ask with one instead please :)
12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Not that I know of! would be awfully neat though.
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? Oh man, I had a fun star wars piece I was writing with my dear friend, Jess, when impostor syndrome struck too hard to finish-- I still have the embroidery she did of our title (the inverse must also be true) in my office hanging below my first rejection letter :)
14. What’s your all time favorite ship? every goblin couple that make out nasty style, so uh, rust/sugar :( they're so special to me and pulled me out of a Hellacious writer's block
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? My only wip is Sunday School Dropout because I sort of forgot where I was going with it, it'll come back with light voyeurism, blood drinking, virginity taking, the usual order
16. What are your writing strengths? I feel like this is question to really sell myself but honestly, hell if I know, creating place? mannerisms maybe? Beyond my general insecurities, some of the nicest compliments I've gotten are for things I did unintentionally so hard to say! I have crafted some fuckin nonlinear bangers I'll give myself that much.
17. What are your writing weaknesses? I DON'T KNOW HOW TO MAINTAIN TENSE and I HAVE NO WORKING KNOWLEDGE OF SENTENCE STRUCTURES, which annoy me and are my father's biggest complaints so I can't take them seriously enough to consciously attempt to improve on them yet. Lately, I've been smoking weed and flipping vocabulary flashcards before bed because my diction feels stagnant, a bit repetitive across pieces like.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I can't even speak english well enough to write coherently I'm not going to fuck up further with google translate. I did some ballet au's a few years back that I know have some french in it but I think I did a firmly okay job with the sprinkles of dialogue-- I know damn well my terminology is correct.
19. First fandom you wrote for? technically game of thrones, I have a sansa/sandor reunion very angrily tapped out in my notes app when season eight skipped it. The first work I posted was Seduction of Odile after I saw a post here about the potential of a rey/kylo blackswan au, reached out and asked if I could give it a try and here I am 22 works and years later :)
20. Favorite fic you’ve written? I'm going to be corny but I have a soft spot for every fic that connected me with other writers who are so talented and inspiring and force me to be better so I feel like I can talk to them lmao
tagging tagging tagging @the-heartlines @labyrinthphanlivingafacade @littleredwritingcat @abeadofpoison @teeth-ing @itstendereye @barbie-nightmare-house
#it's spring and there is rain on my metal roof and peepers peeping in the swamp#i'm v happy and the will to write is strong again :)#mads levshakoff
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@vomitpremium 🥺
DON'T.....START A CONVERSATION WITH ME ABOUT MY OCS....I HAVE SOOOO MANY
I sometimes don't know WHERE TO BEGIN BUT LEMME TALK ABOUT MY FIRST OC NICK SINCE I LOVE HER SO MUCH
SHE'S MY BABY GIRL!!! I've had her since I was like 10 years old. She started as my own persona but I changed her over time to be an original character of what I wish I saw in cartoons growing up. She is my FIRST oc ever. EVER!!!
I watched a lot of anime as a kid and IT ACTUALLY....WAS always super annoying to me when the main female character SUCKED at talking with her crush. I hated the shy timid??? Lovesick fools??? (I was literally only 12 with no crush until i was like 19 so yeah) Girly girls?? Idk how to explain it. But i never felt like I could relate to any female character growing up aside from idk KATARA? FROM AVATAR...
But i also didn't like SOLELY tomboy charactera either because they were messy, rude and HATED girls that were more feminine normally so 💀 i didn't like that either. So i wanted to make the middle ground!
So i made the girl i wish I saw in cartoons and anime. The weird, silly just a fun girl who wasn't participating interested in romance, and if she did start liking someone, she wouldn't become a shy awkward mess when talking to her crush. I grew up literally thinking your partner is supposed to be your best friend! Someone you can talk to anything about...so i generally didn't like the scared to talk to the person you "like"
Anyways...i also grew up watching a lot of Magical Doremi so I made her a witch! She can cast spells, make potions, fly on a broom and talk to cats. I like the fantasy of magic and what you can do with that genre. I also like the idea of modren settings so I made THREE REALMS for my ocs and Nick sometimes likes to travel through all three of them with her friends, going on adventure and just having fun!
So yeah I have more on her but 💀 i always get intimidated when someone just vaguely says "talk about your oc" LIKE NOOOO BESTIE I GOTTA KNOW SPECIFICS?!?
Also nick has her own tag so if there was ever a chance you wanted to read more! Just click her tag right here
👇🏻
(Nick Tag)
#Nicolette (Nick) Estella Lunes#nick the witch#nickthewitch#my art#stinkiesdraws#my artwork#original character#digital art#my ocs#original#artists on tumblr#ask about my ocs#i love my ocs
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Theory: Chamber and Neon’s “Misunderstanding”
Another theory: Chamber and Neon’s misunderstanding is pretty personal *wink wink*
Sorry this feels so shallow but my guess is she thought he was going for the more-than-friends route, but it was all part of his schemes.
Neon has some major electrical powers plus involvement with Kingdom/radiants because of the parents’ work (looking at her dossier), so she likely was of some value to Chamber’s plans
I’d be hella broken too as a 19 (18?)-year-old if some charming guy was pouring attention and talking to me the way he does only to find out I’m being used for some selfish business-y goal. That is–if it is true that Neon was 19 when she got into the VP.
Chamber describing her to Reyna as an “impressionable young mind”. This himbo knew what he was doing.
From a fellow Asian girl, yeeeee the parents often want us to be pretty sheltered lmao I wouldn’t know better than to stay away from this dude
Also saw this Tumblr post somewhere saying Neon’s family would probably tease her whenever Chamber drops by AND I BELIEVE IT’S CANON
“OI TALA YUNG BOYFRIEND MO ANDITO” and all that stuff. I’d be annoyed into believing maybe there is a shot if she were me HAHAHA
Chamber’s voicemail to Brim: “Appeal to her sense of service, she gets that from her family.”
EXCUSE ME MONSIEUR—how do you know she gets it from her family?? That’s pretty personal. And the way he says it in the voicemail, idk if I’m digging into it too much but omg the way his tone just falters and his little pause after (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KhMd7i2Zu8k)
Not Chamber being scared to fetch her in Manila during her recruitment lolololol
No Chamber-Neon voice interactions (except for that line where she tells him to leave her out of his schemes)? Not even during the whole strike team with Fade thing? Damn, y’all rly ain’t on speaking terms?
Cuz yeah I don’t think she wants any of Chamber’s BS after all that
Neon when killing an enemy Chamber: “Bye Monsieur!” —You can’t tell me that doesn’t have “boy, bye” energy
[PHOTO NOT MINE] Not me fangirling either aaaa who made this??? But lol if I were Chamber and I saw a girl with mad powers looking like Neon in the photo like sheeshhhhh, I’d be smooth talking too (Who’s the artist? Pls tell me if you know so I can credit)
#Valorant#valorant headcanons#valorant neon#neon valorant#chamber valorant#valorant chamber#chamber x neon#valorant x reader
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k I don’t really care MUCH about cvlur’s past actions in the hobby with her preorder & shit, cuz I wasn't directly affected. it was one of those things where everyone was talking bout it but i didn't order/want a doll so it wasn’t personal to me. It sucked/etc/hope the victims got compensated/etc. That's a disclaimer cuz I'm neither a cvlur fan or hater. This ain’t about her directly. It’s about her fans/haters who like to debate this constantly lately. Which I seem to fuckin be surrounded by. Also, my tone is kinda aggro to some people cuz I curse but i don’t actually lose sleep over this shit lmfao.
what DOES annoy me anytime someone brings this up like that last confession crying about how ppl are so mad she fucked up when she was “young” - girl is ALMOST 30 NOW if I understand correctly. If it happened 10 yrs ago she wouldnt have been in her early 20s, she’d been like 16-19 and THAT would be WAY more understandable to say “she was young and didn’t know any better.” this shit happened LESS than 10 yrs, she was like, college age, which for US is 18-22 TYPICALLY if you go to college fresh outta highschool for a 4 year degree. ppl in their early 20s, while yeah, in the grand scheme of LIFE are young, are still ADULTS, capable of running complex fuckin tasks from working at a company to managing money for a group order. ppl in their early 20s include 20-24. stop infantilizing people. People can make mistakes at ANY age and severely misjudge a situation (intentional or not what she did). cvlur and I are roughly the same iirc, at the time of sending this im 28, turning 29. If she’s younger than me, she was running an order as a highschooler, which she wasn’t.
There were SO fucking many ppl in college in their “early 20s” who, mature or not, worked with large sums of money, complex organizational structures, etc. some ppl are suited for that shit, some ain’t. You can straight up just say “she was under prepared for the situation” instead of “oh poor bby she was so young 🥺 she just didn’t know!!!” you sound like a fuckin moron, anon. Do you treat every 20yr old who makes a simple mistake at the grocery store like that too? You better tip ur waiters extra who are under 25 even if they spill your drink or make you wait bc they were just too young to know better, they can’t be blamed for that
and for the other person in the comments too, “adults obsessing over her” or whatever …… she’s an adult she’s an adult she’s an adult no wonder why she avoids talking to ppl both haters and fans alike take away her fucking agency SO much. OFF THE SUBJECT OF CVLUR but relating to scammers rn tho, the same can STILL be said about it. Their age doesn’t = not knowing enough about running a good thing. Look at ppl complaining abt dxg1rly, is she worse than everyone younger bc she’s said she’s almost 40, so she only went in with bad intents and not a mistake like cvlur? same with bvmf?
Not sayin dx or bvmf or anyone else who’s been late on shipping/etc etc is absolved of anything, or that they’ve done smth, and same with cvlur, cuz i’ve never ordered from any of these ppl. but don’t give ppl the weak ass get outta jail “oh i was 21 I was just too young to know!”to keep using esp if they really did do something bad. Also, anon, late shipping is absolutely scam territory, and if it happened to you I bet you'd cry scam too by year 2 or whatever lmfaooooo. Thanks for coming to my “I don’t like that the community infantilizes so much shit about this hobby for grown adults” ted talk, I’m off to go scam someone or smth cuz i’m in my 20s so I’m young and don’t know any better lmfao
~Anonymous
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I wanted to ask your followers and your opinion on something. I block liberally because I'd like to avoid starting shit on my blog. I have a couple piece of art (and other posts) that get notes despite how old they are. Some stuff like an old still popular ship and general fandom humor. But some stuff is cute art. Cute shit that anti's like to flock too. It sucks bc I adore cute things (I also adore cute thing + dark/problematic themes) and pastel colors. And this interest is really important to me because I spent a majority of my youth rejecting "girly" things bc surprise surprise it turns out I'm trans (NB) and was desperately trying to distance myself from being associated as a girl. It took years of work to allow myself to enjoy "girly" things without feeling guilty or like I was lying to myself. Anti's will have to pry my love for cute shit and pastels from my cold dead problematic fingers.
These posts don't get too many notes daily so it's relatively easy for me to do a quick search of some key words on individual blogs who interact with my work and then block on site. Sometimes however I feel a little unsure about the blocking because sometimes the only results that come up and stink of anti behavior are 3 to 6 years old. I'm left wondering if I should really block these people because none of their recent stuff sets off red flags. Like there is a possibility that they're no longer like that and just haven't bothered to purge their blog. I get that it's okay for me to set boundaries and be safe, but I also feel guilty bc if it is people who have changed/ex-anti's I don't want to contribute to the issue of isolating people that leave toxic groups. Since, like, the threat of isolation is something that's used to keep people from leaving cult-like spaces.
I understand that I'm overthinking a lot, and me blocking these people is probably not doing what I worry about. I know it's not worth my energy to worry about, therapy taught me that. It's just practicing telling your brain to cut it out is forever a journey.
But anyways, I was wondering what your guy's opinion is, especially for those who regularly block on site to avoid anti's if the only anti stuff you can find on their blog is years old. And if you don't is there a threshold? Like how recent does the anti behavior have to be for you to consider it a reason to block?
(I know you, OTNF, have mention you only block people who are a brand of asshole at you and not preemptively block like I mention, but maybe some of the people who read your stuff do? But I'd also like to hear your opinion if you want to share it/have something to add. I enjoy your responses and want to thank you for being consistently informative and interesting. That's probably worded weird lol, but yeah, thank you for taking time to read this.)
--
:)
I do preemptively block people, but it's generally for seeming extremely annoying at the time I block them, usually in their tumblr header or an inflammatory comment on another anti's post. These aren't subtle people is what I'm saying.
When I block preemptively, it's less about protecting myself and more about taking pleasure in going "U Suck!" even if they never know.
I generally don't bother digging back through someone's archive unless I'm just enjoying looking at the posts. Whether they'll have changed is hard to say though. 3 years just isn't that long, but it also depends if we're talking 16-19 or 40-43.
It's not your job to help cult victims escape though. Sure, it's nice if they don't get shunned, yadda yadda, but you welcoming them to your personal tumblr is not a public service you're honor bound to provide.
Also, maybe they haven't posted any anti bullshit in 3 years, but have they posted the opposite? I see no reason they should be coddled for once holding reprehensible views and merely ceasing to be vocal about them.
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Sims Tag
Tagged by @ho3sferatu! Thanks ^_^
Readmore’d cause it gets a bit long :P
1. What’s your favourite sims death?
Probably fright, cause the animation is so funny like they have time to pause and check their pulse before dropping dead
2. Alpha CC or Maxis Match?
I can tell this is aimed at TS4 haha I had to google Alpha CC to check I knew what it meant - So semi-realistic? I mean obviously I lean towards Maxis Match, but if I like how something looks I’ll use it even if it’s not from the same style.
3. Do you cheat when your sims gain weight?
No, that actually happened to Klothilde because she kept eating fish and it takes so long for them to eat fish that she got fat after eating it once lol - But TS2 fat meshes aren’t even really fat, so it doesn’t make much difference to me heh
4. Do you use move objects?
Only for placing deco things, cause I don’t want to end up placing a chair or something that’s actually inaccessible and not find out until after I’ve built everything else around where I placed it
5. Favorite mod?
No Red Pause Lines, cause it’s 500x more annoying if I have to crop that out every time I take a screenshot
6. First expansion/game/stuff pack you got?
University, I pretty much got all the TS2 stuff as it came out heh
7. Do you pronounce “live mode” like aLIVE or LIVing?
aLIVE, but I think about it more like how a TV show says “We’re live” or something since that’s where the game actually progresses in time
8. Who’s your favorite sim that you’ve made?
Cirrus! There’s some close seconds, but Cirrus actually has history in my game versus just being a face I liked, and the way her parents’ genetics created the little side smirk she has that I don’t think I could recreate in CAS
9. Have you made a simself?
I did when I was 13 - I was exactly at that age where child sims felt too young to represent myself, but teen sims felt too old. I went with a child sim just for the proportions lol but yeah that was the last time I was interested in making a simself.
10. What sim traits do you give yourself?
Well to keep it TS2 themed, I think it’d be something like this:
11. Which is your favorite EA hair color?
Um black? That’s always the default color I pick when doing any sort of dress up game
12. Favorite EA hair?
fhairshorttuckin:
It’s the only hair I’ve never fully replaced with a default, I just do a texture default
13. Favorite life stage?
Adult I guess, they just have the most stuff available to do
14. Are you a builder or are you in it for the gameplay?
Both, I like building but I like to play the lots I build. And when I’m playing, I think of what kind of builds would be fun to play, and so the gameplay also inspires my building.
15. Are you a CC creator?
Kind of? I’ve made clothing recolors, makeup, hair recolors, etc. but I haven’t done anything besides sharing lots/sims in a while.
16. Do you have any simblr friends/a sim squad?
Not particularly, I have mutuals that I always like seeing on my dash/activity but I’m not the most talkative person on tumblr lol
17. What’s your favorite game? (1, 2, 3, or 4)
2 of course ^_^
18. Do you have any sims merch?
No? lol
19. Do you have a YouTube for sims?
Technically yeah, it’s my “personal” YT account but 90% of my videos are of The Sims.
20. How has your “sim style” changed throughout your years of playing?
I used to do more semi-realistic CC, just based on what I’d accumulated and liked the look of at the time. I still have a lot of that CC in my Downloads, I just don’t use it as often anymore as more recently downloaded Maxis match stuff.
21. What’s your Origin ID?
idk, I think I have one but I’ve never shared anything for TS4 so it’s kinda useless lol
22. Who’s your favorite CC creator?
Ooh that’s a tough one, @platinumaspiration comes to mind cause I really love how bright/colorful a lot of their CC is and I like a lot of the clothing/hair styles :)
23. How long have you had a simblr?
2012.............. lol
Here is the 1st post I ever made on here, it’s for TS3 and has way more straightness than my game has had in years lmao
24. How do you edit your pictures?
I explained it here sort of a few years ago, but I have a newer version of Photoscape and I don’t have access to Photoshop anymore. I still do the highlight/shadow tweaking stuff, but I use Photoscape to do that now.
25. What expansion/game/stuff pack do you want next?
Well obviously that’s not a question for TS2 lol but something that both TS3 and TS4 have that would’ve been cool in TS2 is careers that you can actually play/interact with instead of the sim disappearing for 8 hours.
26. What expansion/game/stuff pack is your favorite so far?
Nightlife, I love everything about the themes/aesthetic/gameplay, it has objects/features I use more than any other EP to this day, it’s just exactly my style.
Tagging: @krabbysims @potentialfate-sims @aondaneedles @simmer-until-tender! Feel free to ignore if you’ve done it already haha
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supernatural s13e6 tombstone (w. davy perez)
SAM
No. You're – you're dead.
CASTIEL
Yeah, I was. But then I… annoyed an ancient cosmic being so much that he sent me back.
i mean. that's how i described it too. but laughing that we're seriously gonna say that in this moment without the boys reacting, lol okay!
please not this music, it's making me laugh. papa castiel is home! cue the cheesiest fucking emotional music. you know what it reminds me of? the zelda breath of the wild like... those flashback cut scenes, the memories? mushy ones with zelda haha (plinky piano bits around 19:19 if you're curious)
cas hitting the hug jackpot, 3 unsolicted ones! and the one with jack was sweet
whew and now we get cheesy old west music too.
DEAN
Yeah, we've done more on less. Besides Dodge City's kind of, uh, kind of awesome. All right, well… two salty hunters, one half-angel kid, and a dude who just came back from the dead. Again. Team Free Will 2.0. Here we go.
no more suicidal dean apparently, get an unexpected resurrection and cowboy shenanigans and he's happy and fired up
one thing i find endlessly amusing/fascinating is how like, all these years we're gonna have silly little logistical questions like. how they clean their suits, are they doing dry cleaning, are they rolling up their suits in their duffels with everything else, etc etc. but we got to see some ironing not long back and now, dry cleaning bags!
cas's face is cracking me up
JACK
He really likes cowboys.
CASTIEL
Yes. Yes, he does.
also my face at the creative team that decided this was part of dean's schtick. i want to let dean enjoy silly things. but they just push so hard
also they're gonna get one room (albeit a suite) for all 4 of them. jack doesn't sleep much, cas doesn't sleep at all. what are those two gonna do while the humans are sleeping? awkward
SAM
You're in a good mood, huh?
DEAN
Yeah. And?
SAM
Nothing. No, no, I-I-I just, uh… you've been having a rough go, so it's… it's good to see you smile.
DEAN
Well, I said I needed a big win. We got Cas back. That's a pretty damn big win.
SAM
Yeah. Fair enough.
what's up with your attitude there, sam. you don't actually seem very happy. worried he's gonna crash and burn? jealous that it's cas? jealous that cas is taking jack from him? (lol)
little bonding for cas and jack while the humans were sleeping talking about his mom was nice
untitled 1 and 2 our old friends!! last seen i think in one episode in 10x10 and not quite some time before that. if my blog search/index wasn't so fucked i could find more details. song remains the same
set designers let the kitsch explode. those silhouettes
CASTIEL
I told you. He's an angry sleeper. Like a bear.
cheesy but i laughed. i, too, wake up in a foul mood and should not be talked to
oh sure dean, you're cringing over cas's line but we've all been very generous in accepting your goofy ass shit like that bolo tie and need to cosplay tombstone to begin with
can truly appreciate the sheer awfulness of that hat cas is wearing out in the sunlight. it's so small, it's so translucent. cheapest of straw hats. (not knockin straw hats! my dad was an avid cowboy hat wearer and had a couple nice straw ones for the summer)
i don't pay too much attention to how time flows on this show, i do know sometimes it can be weeks between episodes, sometimes it's the next day (another thing that irked me on teen wolf was how they spent like... 2+ full seasons in one year to keep the kids in high school). but anyway, i just wonder how much show universe time cas was not off on some whatever, and around to do this stuff hanging out with them. them crammed in sam's room on his uncomfortable bed to watch a movie, like they did with charlie? lol. based on the number of times i've seen it in fic, i gather a bunker room with a tv does become a thing at some point, so maybe it was in there?
.... a shootout in the parking lot of the knockoff wells fargo in broad daylight. what planet are we on right now. so jack can accidentally kill a civilian with his powers, great
CASTIEL
Jack, I've killed people who didn't deserve it… my friends– I've killed people I loved. I wish I could tell you that it– that it gets easier, that with time, it hurts less, but that would be a lie because it– it never gets easier. And those moments, they never stop hurting. But that doesn't mean that you should stop fighting. Doesn't mean that just because you made a mistake – and that's what this is, Jack. It's a mistake. That doesn't mean that you can't– can't be better, do better. I believe that. I have to believe that.
so the people he killed that he loved, would that be like. angelic siblings? wonder if the wiki keeps track of who killed whom. he killed a bunch of fake deans in that one episode lol
SAM
And we still believe in you, Jack. We, uh–
JACK
Stop. Just… Please stop.
anyway, point being, wasn't this just an accident?? like when eileen accidentally killed the bmol dude? eileen got a hug and commiseration, they're talking about who they murdered and WE STILL BELIEVE YOU'RE NOT EVIL i would tell them to stop too!
why do they do this with him
JACK
No, maybe you're right. Maybe I'm just another monster.
DEAN
No, you're not. I thought you were. I did. But… Like Sam said, we've all done bad. We all have blood on our hands. So if you're a monster, we're all monsters.
dean gets to have his little personal growth acknowledgement
really added dimension to the terror of thinking he's a monster like sam did, with a bunch of unintended injury and now death wrapped up in it. kind of hard to... care about anything except vaguely because we sitll barely know him but if i sit and think about it, sure
and a whole other thing dealing with kid having a meltdown when they can just teleport away.
oh god just considered now dean might feel extra guilty for telling jack he was a monster and he was gonna kill him, now that jack ran away. that could be the crash and burn :p
#supernatural#spnwatch#spn clip#spn musical score#spn desktop background update#davy perez#jay gruska#spn 13x06#spn zelda music
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