#also the slow mo was a total accident

[ultimateaclrecovery]

Had an amazing time riding horses down at the beach in San Diego this weekend. The guide was telling us how this part of the beach is reservered just for horses (and border patrol agents cuz it’s right by Tijuana hence the giant fence.....). We were the only ones out there and got to canter your and down the beach a couple of times which was pure magic.

The ponies were well trained and while they def wanted to race a bit they also would stop on a dime. They didn’t love the waves crashing into them but didn’t mind so much walking in the water.

It’s always been a dream to ride on a beach and it’s been the absolute highlight of California

#also the slow mo was a total accident #but it worked out fabulously #esp because my attempts at filming while riding were chaotic at best #but didn’t fall #didn’t drop my phone #and had the best time #a perfect day #it was so pretty #and the ponies were so cute #his name was Vegas #well worth the two hour drive #a literal dream

[lnsfawwi]

not to defend the Russos and Markus & McFeely or anything cus we'll never know what exactly prompted them to write that bullshit ending for Steve

BUT

I do like to think that they didn't do it bc THEY were reacting badly to stucky's popularity

first. the Russos have always been aware of stucky romantic subtexts. they have been baiting fans with stucky comments since forever. they were they ones first to call stucky a love story, they were the ones used slow-mo for Steve's falling scene specifically to make it poetic and romantic, they might not want to make stucky canon but they certainly wouldn't shove steggy down the audiences' throat when it made no sense whatsoever. remember these guys made movies with 'what would honest trailer say' in mind! besides, they are businessmen in a way, when they shot community they developed Jeff/Annie subplot bc fans were demanding it, they used stucky (as well as sambucky) to bait fans bc fans WANTED it. NO ONE asked for steggy.

second. for all their faults, Markus and McFeely are not bad writers. they didn't write Bucky in the traditional love interest role by accident. they knew well what they were doing. McFeely even admitted that stucky were soulmates and had all the elements of a traditional love story. also unlike the Russos, they wrote catfa, they went into the project knowing steggy wouldn't be endgame, they paved way for stevesharon in caws, not knowing stevebucky would be such a hit. again, they never intent to make stevebucky gay, but if they wanted to make Steve straight, they would've stuck to Sharon.

what I'm trying to say is. endgame was shot back to back with Infinity War and Infinity War stevebucky, however scarce, were totally, completely and beautifully in character. then nothing made sense in endgame. it just doesn't seem plausible if it was their fault.

it's almost as if someone suddenly demanded them to make 1. Steve so straight republicans are using him as alpha male example and 2. Tony Stark the ultimate hero bc he's fucking dying so forget about cacw and aou and all the bs he's done

Kevin Feige you better sleep with one eye open

[owlixx]

CoD Notes: MW2 Beat

My notes last left off right at the start of Act 2 of Modern Warfare 2 (2009). The rest of “Wolverines!” was a little bit of a chore but not too bad. I was proud of taking down a helicopter with a nearby LMG instead of walking all the way across the level to get a rocket launcher like the objective marker told me too.

The favela escape mission is…fine. I definitely found the vertical fighting to be a bit annoying but the big parkour set piece at the end is neat.

The Stryker escort mission kind of sucks, I was half on my phone every time I told it where to shoot.

The oil rig mission is awesome of course except for that nasty part at the end where the thermal scope enemies really give it to you. The slow mo breaches are fun too of course. And I like when this game offers you a lot of different weapons at once.

The gulag mission was also just fine. I had honestly kind of forgotten that Price wasn’t already hanging out with us so I was a little confused for a second when he was the surprise prisoner. And that adds extra context to the Makataov gulag springing in the new MW3 (2023).

The Washington DC fighting is cool in this game. As a kid, I don’t think I appreciated the imagery of literally fighting enemy troops in front of the Washington monument.

The sub assault mission is fun, lots of predator drones, but I did kind of get stuck in the middle at one point. Also very funny that the AUG is an LMG in this game.

EMP mission is fun, feels very tense and high stakes. And then of course the White House mission is neat since you literally go through every inch of it.

The estate assault, file transfer, and subsequent escape were probably the most challenging part of the game for me. I did enjoy getting to see classic Ghost but I’m surprised by how small his part in this game is. Also I had totally forgotten about “Ramirez” and “Roach”, and I’m kind of surprised they haven’t tried to incorporate either character into the new games.

I had a much easier time with the scrapyard three-way battle than I did as a kid. I think back then I tried to kill every enemy, but here it was pretty easy to just run past 90% of them. And another fun set piece getting on the plane!

The cave assault was a little challenging, good test of my abilities here at the end. I did however really hate the boat section, I kept dying to stupid stuff. Although I did have a good laugh getting all turned around during the river rapids part.

And then of course the ending! A classic, very cool. Did not notice it literally took place on Rust as a kid but now it’s glaringly obvious.

I did also play a few matches of multiplayer. I was excited to be contrarian and try to use the blast shield, but it blocks your vision AND your minimap! I did use it long enough to get a challenge done by accident.

Speaking of, I do like the challenge layout in this game more than some of the recent ones, in terms of there being a defined number of clearly attainable goals to achieve. I feel like now it’s more about camo challenges, daily challenges, seasonal prestige challenges, but I had just been thinking about how there really ought to be something akin to the camo grind for perks and equipment. Not in terms of customization, but just in terms of keeping track of how much you use each and giving you an incentive to try them all. Here in MW2 2009, that’s just XP and maybe a calling card, but that’s enough to make me consider dropping the most used perks on my account since I already have the challenges finished for a couple of them.

I googled around for what weapon to use and settled on trying the UMP. I remember it being OP back in the day anyways and already had a class equipped with it. Felt pretty good! I managed to eventually start to go even on KD but I didn’t have any “on fire” matches. In fact, I even got nuked once. That’s when I kind of realized what an uphill fight it would be to try and level to max in one of these older games. Certainly not impossible, but there’s lots more noobs on the newer games.

It is wild to see these classic maps again after getting used to their MW3 (2023) versions. So much less colorful and detailed but more like how I remember them, of course. I wouldn’t mind maybe playing long enough to see them all but I also wanna move on with this mega playthrough.

I skipped WaW for now to save it for coop so it seems only fitting then to skip Black Ops 1 for now so that I can experience the entire classic MW trilogy back to back, then get to play Black Ops 1 and 2 back to back before moving on to Ghosts and then Advanced Warfare.

So overall, I liked Modern Warfare 2 a lot! It’s hard to objectively rank it compared to CoD 4 when I have such strong childhood memories of MW2 (I was 11!) and also when one was a remaster. I think MW2 certainly had bigger set pieces, more action, more classic unforgettable moments, but CoD 4 had a more cohesive, consistent experience. MW2 didn’t have infinite enemies as bad though so I think it wins the point.

#call of duty #CoD #mw2 2009 #modern warfare 2 2009 #call of duty modern warfare 2 2009

[policedrum9]

Apartment To All Your Holiday

If desire to ascertain exactly make use of are paying per square foot, consider the total spend you will be repaying for one month's rent and divide it along with total sq . ft . in the apartment family. For example, in case the cost within a one bedroom apartment house $950 and also the square footage is 700 sq ft, perform these calculations. $950 dollars divided by 700 square feet equals to be able to $1.35 per square base. vnpt internet line for rent If you love to go out, it is mostly a good idea to live close to bars along with other nightlife. Whenever you can walk home instead of experiencing to choose a ride, can make going out a lot easier and a lot of safer also. You never want to risk creating an accident because walking home isn't an option after drinking too a lot of. Most the apartments are concentrated in three main resorts - Bansko the ski destination and Sunny Beach and St. Vlas that take prescription the Bulgarian Black Sea coast. Bansko and Sunny Beach combined account for as much as 60 percent of all holiday apartments available to book. The construction boom in these resorts was aided via availability of land as well as the interest of U.K. and Irish buyers. In fact, the construction boom manufactured from Bansko and St. Vlas much more essential holiday destinations than anyone could imagine just a short while ago. This is very true of . Vlas that was a sleepy village until recently and at the moment a bustling resort.

When renting your first apartment, you'll find lot of important factors that will need to take. How much is leasing? Does the landlord cover any software? Are a washer/dryer included in-unit? Does someone get a balcony/patio? Does the property allow puppies? Is there a button that instantly summons friends of strippers to my door? Yes, it could be overwhelming unable but, several to assume slow and gain regarding what you're getting yourself into. Dependent how many roommates experience and the lavishness of this complex, rent can be anywhere from $200 per/mo to $800 per/mo. Most college students do donrrrt you have the luxury of being picky when deciding find place. We are able to only afford so incredibly much. All sufferers have probably have stood a least one roommate sometimes or another in our lifetime. If you don't have one inside your life post college, you may have had one a person did attend school. For some reason helps to slice the everyday life costs. Plus there are a handful other incentives that these items be qualified to take regarding as in fact. Of course all of us want to be experiencing our own 3 bedroom apartment to ourselves but that often isn't truth of the matter. Read more track down out the should start with your roommate seek out. Getting a borrowing arrangement for your property is some and slow process. A person to have excellent credit, a large down payment in order to obtain a good interest rate, and jump the bunch of hoops. Anyone do finally get in home, after that you are locked into owing someone loads of money, and require to continue paying that most desired to you should come. With renting, lengthy as as pay out your rent, you don't have anything to worry about, given that the lease comes up, you possess a choice calling stay longer, or find someplace easier. Next will need to to get to the place you to with. Check https://vnptvinaphone.net.vn/chuong-trinh-khuyen-mai-lap-mang-vnpt-ha-noi-thang-1-2021/ and actual truth is that estate phase. Look for websites that guide you in your renting aims. Make a list of obtainable places and rank themselves. The greatest benefit ones Craigslist search programs, besides the opportunity to search Craigslist nationwide will be the filters they have. Some programs have search filters which can be designed for purchasing homes or renting homes. What may contain?

#lắp mạng vnpt cho gia đình ưu đãi

[susuwatari-kompeito]

默读/Mo Du/Silent Reading by Priest (danmei)

*long post*

Hello! I just finished reading Mo Du for the first time, and thought I would make a rec post for it. This is just my personal take, so if you disagree with me, that’s totally fine. Additionally, this is a positive-focused recommendation, for me, the good outweighs the bad by far. All images in this post come from here. 

Info on where to read & trigger warnings: here

Why I’m recommending: As a fan of the crime genre, this novel definitely stood out to me in terms of plot and the development of the cases spanning three generations. I enjoyed how the narrative explored human nature, and what people are capable of when driven to their wit’s end. Do they pull themselves out of the trenches, or do they give into schemes and fall into misery? The novel ultimately centers around finding justice through fair means, the pursuit of the truth, and perseverance.

Priest jam-packs this novel to the brim, and there’s not a wasted word. The intricacy, the way the cases are layered, and the humor all made this novel well-worth the read for me. Even though my brain hurt at times trying to keep track of all the details, I was completely sucked in and couldn’t stop reading. 

The Characters

Luo Wenzhou, the protagonist. He’s confident and very blunt in his communication, but he’s an excellent leader who shows his care for his teammates through actions, and is well-respected by them. He plays the “bad cop” in the good cop-bad cop interrogation scenario haha. 

Fei Du, the flirty CEO with a tragic past. He’s very intelligent, well put-together, and can wear different faces to achieve what he wants. Despite how he comes off, FD has a network of people he cares for and who trust him. 

Tao Ran is LWZ’s right-hand man and also his best friend. He’s easy to like because he’s just simply a good guy and works hard at his job. Despite his capabilities, he’s a little slow-witted and clumsy on the romance front XD. He plays the “good cop” in the interrogation room :).

Lang Qiao is the upbeat female on the team and often mourns over working overtime. Xiao Haiyang is the new member; he tries really hard and is quite smart, but is not too adept in social-situations. 

Luo Yiguo is LWZ’s fat cat. Yiguo actually adds an interesting angle to the story as he gets his own point of view. One of my favorite parts of the novel hehe.

In addition to LWZ’s team, there is the web of witnesses and suspects. They all have their own unique flavor to them, and reading each of their stories, no matter how minor, is more insight into Priest’s exploration of the human psyche. Some stories will make you sad, and some make your blood boil. 

The romance (Luo Wenzhou x Fei Du): From my experience, I think that this novel is crime first, and romance second. With that being said, ZhouDu is (probably) my favorite ship out of all the danmei novels I’ve read so far. Their relationship is so heartfelt and down-to-earth despite their backgrounds. They both love all parts of each other, and their relationship provides them the space to relax and be themselves. I also appreciated how it wasn’t a “love at first sight” situation; they needed to get to know each other more beyond the scope of their initial meeting. The romance is developed at an impeccable pace, and it is an absolute delight to see the both of them slowly but surely, fall in love with each other. It also doesn’t get in the way of the developing crime-oriented plot. There’s a super nice balance of flirting, angst, fluff, humor, intimacy, conversation, and domesticity. They aren’t overly sappy, just really solid and satisfied with what they have, and that made me really happy. 

Listen to the ending from the audio drama!! I think it sounds really beautiful and the lyrics are good too. I love how its framed as a duet between LWZ and FD. 

Just a few moments I enjoyed under the cut. Spoilers ahead, so proceed with caution. 

one of my favorite scenes was in Book 5, after Tao Ran gets hospitalized due to an accident while pursuing a suspect - LWZ tells FD the story about coming out to Tao Ran - it made me cry because it showed how much LWZ values his friendship and how worried he is for TR ;-;

When LWZ picks the lock to FD’s room after they argue over FD’s mother’s case & LWZ discovers the basement - LWZ pretty much confesses (disguised as a lecture), feeds FD and then drags him to work - poor FD is just like ????? 

When LWZ forces FD to confess his feelings - it was such a satisfying scene - but they aren’t official until later - LWZ also forces FD to make their relationship official which is another gratifying scene

How LWZ’s teammates still listened to his command after he was suspended - it shows how much they trust and respect him

The entire operation where LWZ, FD, and Lu Jia rescued Lu Guosheng - it was such an action packed scene, I honestly thought Lu Guosheng was going to be killed at some point

When FD goes to LWZ’s house to feed Yiguo and discovers the croquettes that weren’t put away were destroyed by Yiguo and FD needs to clean up the mess hahaha

The two times when LWZ gives cilantro buns to Lang Qiao as punishment because she offended LWZ and his romantic life lmao

How LWZ always lectures FD when he’s being troublesome 

#默读 #silent reading #mo du #danmei #priest #chinese novel #BL novel #danmei recommendations #luo wenzhou #fei du #zhoudu #my rec

[mgsdays]

do u know any other comics/BLs like 19days? #🥪

Hey dear!

Ohh that's a good question. I don't know any quite like 19 days, an ongoing story that is ultra slow burn. I have read some other amazing BLs though. Here's some that I like:

.

Totally Captivated

• Complete | 49 chapters plus some extras

• General vibe: humor, romance

If you like the mafia background of 19 days, an amazing manhwa is Totally Captivated. Lighthearted, fun and very hot 🔥 One character gives me strong He Tian vibes, both in appearance and in attitude. Plus, the main couple has some fantastic chemistry.

Summary: Jung Ewon has always let his curiosity get the best of him, but even he could not have predicted that his latest venture would lead to him working for the mafia.

After cheating on his boyfriend and consequently being dumped, Ewon longs for the two of them to reconcile. However, his ex's new boyfriend, the handsome Eun Mookyul, begins to take an interest in him. Finding Ewon intriguing, Mookyul, a mafia boss, decides that he wants Ewon to become his underling—and that's just the start of Ewon's problems.

As the new errand boy in Mookyul's gang, Ewon must now learn to navigate the dangerous world of the mafia all while resisting the advances of his ex-boyfriend's new lover. Should he give in to his desires, he will risk more than just another heartbreak.

At the End of the Road

• Complete | 57 chapters plus extras

• General vibe: dark themes, romance, plot heavy

The summary makes this one sound pretty complicated so I procrastinated checking it out for a bit. When I finally read it I was blown away. The plot is incredible, the romantic interest is ugh so good. The entire story leaves me with a warm feeling of destiny and serendipity. It gets dark and it demands quite a bit of attention but it is definitely worthwhile.

Summary: After a car accident, Taemin finds himself in the body of Siwon, a victim of bullying at school. No longer a pushover, he starts standing up for himself but then meets Woojin, an old friend from the past. Somehow, Woojin immediately picks up Taemin's 'scent' from Siwon. What happened between these two in the past and how will it affect their future?

Walk on Water

• Complete | 62 chapters

• General vibe: romance, hot sex

Ok, this one is a delight to read. It's another one of those "straight guy goes gay for the right guy" kind of plot, but it's beautifully done. The characters' progress feels authentic. You're on the edge of your seat rooting for them. Plus, the art is amazing?? I'd stop reading sometimes just to admire it. @ the artist you didn't have to go this hard and yet you did dude!! Fantstic job.

Plus the sex scenes are just on fire. Phew 🥵

Explicit sex so don't check it out if you're under 18, stay safe, yadda, yadda.

Summary: To earn money, Ed decided to enter the pornographic industry. Secretly, he begins working under the alias of "Tommy". One day, it was suddenly decided that he would be filming as a bottom instead of a top and he's doing it with the famous Glen McQueen as his partner?

No. 6

• Complete | 9 books or 9 mangas (I read the books actually, but the manga is the same story)

• General vibe: social commentary, romance, plot heavy

My all time favorite on the list might be No. 6. No. 6 reads more like 'social political commentary ft. a couple that happens to be boys', rather than a boys love story per see. The plot doesn't revolve around their romance, their romance is also happening in the midst of the chaos. And it is beautiful to watch.

Story wise, No. 6 is a dystopic tale, and it brings up themes of consumption under capitalism, outsourcing of labor, outsorcing of inequalities and goverment control. It's not recent so you might have read it already - if you haven't I can't recommend it enough.

A PERFECT LIFE, IN A PERFECT CITY

For Shion, an elite student in the technologically sophisticated city No. 6, life is carefully choreographed. School, study, and the occasional visit with his friend and classmate Safu. One fateful day, however, he takes a misstep, sheltering an injured boy his age from a typhoon. Known only as Rat, this boy is a VC – a fugitive living outside the computerized tapestry of city control – and helping him will throw Shion’s life into chaos and start him down a path to discovering the appalling secrets behind the superficial perfection of No. 6.

Seven Days

• Complete | 2 volumes

• General vibe: school life, romance

No way you haven't read this, but just in case: seven days!! Go check out seven days!! Seven Days is the BL. School life plots peaked with this one haha It's just two volumes and the story is beautifully done. I re-read from time to time when I want a pick me up.

Summary: On a whim, high school third-year Yuzuru Shino asks out first-year Toji Seryo, who is notorious for being a weeklong lover—he’ll date the first girl to ask him out Monday morning and then promptly dump her by the following Monday! The boys start dating, and by Tuesday, the first inklings of attraction hit. Can these two put words to their feelings before Monday comes, or are old habits too hard to break?

Blue Sky Complex

• Complete | 23 chapters

• General vibe: school life, humor, romance

Another school life story for the list. Blue Sky Complex has some truly hilarious moments, with teenage fumblings that ache with how true to life they are. Zero drama, zero outside interference, just the two main characters slowly (but surely) figuring things out.

Summary: Narasaki only wanted a place where he could sit and read books in peace, but was blackmailed by his teacher into supervising a delinquent called Terashima while working at the school library.

As they spend their days in silent but close proximity, they begin to feel drawn to each other. And then...

Doukyuusei

• Complete | 2 volumes (second is called Sotsugyousey)

• General vibe: lightehearted fun

Fun fact: I went to Japan once and I wanted to buy a book in Japanese just to have it, you know? I don't speak Japanese, I just wanted a book as a souvenir. I bought Doukyuusei. Clearly I'm biased towards this story in particular haha

Everything by this author is gold. Their art style flows, the characters have a certain lightness to them that makes them almost dance in the pages. The author usually draw at least one of the leads with long hair and the hair is so well done, GOD. I could gush about the hair all day.

Perhaps one of the most realistic ones of the list, Doukyuusei is a school life story about when you meet someone at just the right time.

Summary: "A boy boy met a boy. They were in the flush of youth. They were in love that felt like a dream, like sparkling soda pop."

High school students Hiraku Kusakabe and Rihito Sajou are as different as day and night. But opposites attract and before they know it, they've embarked on a journey neither one can quite define but which anyone with eyes can see is "Love."

Mo Dao Zu Shi

• Complete | 126 chapters

• General vibe: slow burn, historical, epic romance

At the risk of being very cliche here: if you haven't read Mo Dao Zu Shi, you're wasting time. Go. This one isn't a manga, but it a fantastic book. It became uber famous for a reason, you know? All the attention is very much deserved. I can't emphasize enough how good it is.

You can watch the TV show The Untamed as well (and the acting is fantastic) but, to me, the experience is just not the same. The TV show removes all explicit romance references from the story, in order to comply with China's censorship. The book leaves nothing out. It is very much a romance, through and through, and it's an epic one. There's slow burn, pining, misunderstandings, fighting everything and everyone for your loved one and coming out stronger on the other side. Truly worth the read.

As the grandmaster who founded the Demonic Path, Wei Wuxian roamed the world in his wanton ways, hated by millions for the chaos he created. In the end, he was backstabbed by his brother and killed by powerful clans that combined to overpower him. He incarnates into the body of a lunatic who was abandoned by his clam and is later, unwillingly, taken away by a famous cultivator among the clans — Lan Wanji. This marks the start of a thrilling yet hilarious journey of attacking monsters, solving mysteries, and raising children. From the mutual flirtation along the way, Wei Wuxian slowly realizes that Lan Wangji, a seemingly haughty and indifferent poker-face, holds more feelings for Wei Wuxian than he is letting on.

#19 days #ask box #anon 🥪 #hope you're doing good anon! #let me know if you read any of these 👀

[weiying-lanzhan-fics]

A Match in the Making by lareine

Veryyyyy good story! WY being oblivious and leading LZ on by accident. WY finally figuring out how he feels... there is a lot of comedy gold in this one ❤️❤️

Quotes:

He turned to surreptitiously inspect Lan Zhan; what was Lan Er-shaoye wearing to his First Date with his future wife? Ah, very nice, very nice. Lan Zhan honestly looked like a model at all times, but the lean cut of his gray pants and the soft fit of his pale blue sweater did a great job of outlining his body and hinting at the muscle underneath.

What would Mianmian think when she saw him? Would it be like those cheesy romcoms, where Lan Zhan would move in slow-mo, a soft glow around him, and toss rippling midnight hair—ah wait, Lan Zhan had his hair up in a bun—okay, and blink slowly like he did when he was feeling Emotion, his thick eyelashes feathering out on his sculpted cheekbones—

“Wei Ying.”

“Hmm?” Wei Ying said.

He turned and Lan Zhan was outlined in a soft glow from a streetlight behind him. Wei Ying couldn’t hold back a laugh. It was a sign!

Lan Zhan gave him a tiny smile.

“Where do we go for the dinner?” Lan Zhan said, his eyes still soft.

“The email said to go through a door or something by the international food station?” Wei Ying said, shrugging as he passed through the doors into the cheerful cacophony of the dining hall. “If we can’t find it, one of the others probably knows, or we can ask someone—”

He broke off as he spotted Mianmian, her arms linked with Qin Su on the right and Zhao Sisi on the left. He waved enthusiastically at them and Mianmian affectionately rolled her eyes before returning the wave.

“Others?” Lan Zhan said.

————

It was sort of like he was sweating and shivering at the same time. Wei Ying also...kind of wanted to barf. But like, happy barf? Maybe? Was that a thing? Energy was also buzzing under his skin, like he could sprint 10 miles on a single breath. And...yep, he still felt like a piece of shit. But he needed to, like, communicate like a semi-adult since Lan Zhan had already done so much heavy lifting on the Mature Adult Who Talks About Things front. 

“Okay,” Wei Ying said. “Okayokayokay. Okay. Lan Zhan.”

Wei Ying kind of felt like his skin was igniting? That was a totally normal human thing to happen. He also felt...floaty. Like, not an alcohol muddled floaty but like he was 200 pounds lighter and laughed in the face of gravity kind of floaty.

He seized Lan Zhan’s face—another thing to apologize for later, but right now he was in serious danger of like, levitating up and bouncing off of the uber Rococo molding and the terrifyingly enormous chandeliers dripping with crystals and festoons tenuously attached to the ceiling.

T, 29800

Summary:

It is a truth universally acknowledged that a man who had all of his shit together must be in search of a partner.

The only person Wei Ying could think of who had their shit together on a level equal to Lan Zhan was Mianmian.

So naturally, to ensure the happiness of two of his very good friends, Wei Ying embarks on a matchmaking journey.

(Five times Wei Ying tries to set up his friends and one time he gets set up himself.)

(Or, the "you like mianmian" cave scene, extended version.)

#lan wangji #lan zhan #wangxian #wei wuxian #wei ying #wangxian fic rec #the untamed fic #the untamed fanfiction #untamed fic #mdzs fic #modern au #roomates

[foxghost]

This week’s danmei rec

潛曖求生 Surviving those Unspoken Rules by 禕庭沫瞳 Yi Ting Mo Tong, 390k, rating E, HE, Showbiz. On jjwxc, but a few chapter's been locked for the E rating. Finished in 2011, author is still writing danmei.

A few warnings (really this time) before we start:

past noncon, no details, most of this is mentioned in the first 10% of the book

MC's rapist ex keeps showing up all over the place like a haunting

the writing style is overall mediocre but easy to read (no slang, pre-Weibo) and writer’s kind of infamous for using too many words when less will do, but that’s a common jjwxc problem

selling points:

Neither your MC and ML are virgins

MC and ML have a really healthy relationship after the slow burn (slow burn for more than half the book) and even before that their friendship is healthy

MC is a flawed character and knows it, made a lot of bad decisions, and the character development is what I’m here for

practically no homophobia (cast full of gays)

The overall tone is comforting, very little angst, any conflict is resolved within chapters and doesn't drag on

Since boy band Season's breakup, Jian Luoyu, its lead singer, hasn't really been doing well in his solo career. He does okay — he represents some brands and produced some albums, but the CEO of his company pimps out their artists in order to gain business opportunities, and promises their artists better treatment and jobs. Jian Luoyu hates living like this, his contract is almost up, and he's considering either quitting the industry or moving to another agency. The only thing stopping him is that he's not even sure if things would be different at other agencies.

That's when he meets (he thinks for the first time) Qin Qianrui, CEO at a much bigger rival agency -- in a VIP hotel room, after his boss handed him a room key. He hands Qin Qianrui a box of condoms and says, "I’m not worried that you’re not clean. I just think that I’m the one who’s dirty." And Qin Qianrui leaves without sleeping with him.

Qin Qianrui actually already seen Jian Luoyu a couple of times, but neither of those times did Jian Luoyu see him. He's also heard him sing, and decided right then to steal him from his current agency. Now that Jian Luoyu's contract is almost up, he does just that — and tells him that if you sign with me, you sign for 10 years. Jian Luoyu at this point though is still pessimistic, despite how confident he is in his music. He asks, "Can I just sing?" As in, can you guarantee that you're not going to sell me like my current boss?

Qin Qianrui gives him that promise to give him as big of a stage as he can manage, and music is all he’ll have to do. Jian Luoyu signs, and his career takes off. The rest is a slow progression of slow burn where Jian Luoyu slowly recovers from his past, and Qin Qianrui slowly convinces him that he's not going to fail Jian Luoyu like his ex; mostly Qin Qianrui takes the role of a boss who’s also a friend -- encouraging, making sure Jian Luoyu doesn’t work too hard, just overall being an amazing person that makes him feel at ease.

Plot-wise, There's dealing with parents (but no homophobia), dealing with Qin Qianrui's stalker (this could have been written better), dealing with scandals etc (brilliant), and there's a triad/mafia subplot in there because ... you know what that triad subplot was totally gratuitous and we don't need anyone shot. I'm sure a car accident or any other life or death situation could have served the same purpose.

Not a perfect book or even the author’s best by any means, but I really enjoyed Jian Luoyu's persistence in his love of music, the minute details in the writing / recording / arranging process, and the novel as a whole just leaves you with a warm fuzzy feeling by the end. There's a babies ever after extra, but the ending was already so happy that it didn't really need it.

#fox reads #queued #the theme lately is stuff written pre-censorship #back when authors could write whatever they wanted

[prettyboy-parker]

favorite fics of 2020 (and a goodbye)

hi all!

first, i wanted to say this is inspired by one of my closest friends my bitch @honeybunstarker . thank u for that 

secondly, i wanted to say a final goodbye. i know that i nearly left a few months ago, but i was still on the fence about writing for marvel then. now, ive lost all interest. thank you all for fueling my love for writing, and making these past two (??? i actually don’t know) years full of excitement and encouragement! from the ups (the blocklist, secret santa) to the downs (my favorite blogs and friends deactivating without a word), ive had the greatest time in this fandom. 

in case you were worried, i am NOT deactivating. my fics will be available for you to read whenever you want.

but, i will not be writing for marvel anymore, nor will i be posting on this blog.

now that the sad part is done, i didn't want to leave you guys without anything to entertain yourselves with. so, here are my favorite fics, including some non-marvel, from this year! 

(all descriptions are from the work itself)

my top fic from this year, which is also one of my favorite fics of all time, is a dog named sunshine.

“Bucky Barnes has issues. Mental health issues, and a whole lot of them, to be precise. Bucky is fucked up, and he knows that. His apartment looks like a dumping ground on most days, he can’t sleep through the night, sometimes he doesn’t shower for six days and doesn’t leave the house except to see his therapist once a week. Mostly, Bucky has no idea how the whole “talking about your problems” thing is supposed to help him, but sometimes his therapist has some really great ideas. Like getting a dog. Which is how Bucky meets Steve. Steve has blond hair and shoulders as broad as Bucky’s future if he wouldn’t suffer from depression and multiple mental disorders, and a waist as small as Bucky’s self-esteem. Steve also has a yellowish dog with floppy ears called Sunshine. And sunshine makes its way into Bucky’s life with a bounce in its step.”

a modern stucky fic which portrays depression in the best way i have seen in a fic so far. unfortunately, it has been orphaned before being finished :(

starker:

hey baby, slip between my beta-pleats and get to know my alpha-helix? By @starkerforlife6969​ and @darker-soft-starker​

“Even though Tony can't tell the difference between Manolo Blahnik and Jimmy Choo, Peter really has no other choice.

His heat is around the corner, so even though he loathes the party-going, booze drinking, smug playboy know-it-all that is Tony Stark-

He'll just have to do.”

if you asked me what my favorite starker fic of all time is, i’d tell you it’s this one

raising hybrid puppies by jaypendragon

“A non-powered Tony/Peter coffee shop AU with billionaire Tony and working-class, teenage Peter. Also, Toomes has a bakery and somehow Last Week Tonight is a genuine plot point.”

underage, slowburn, happy ending 

even though it’s one of the most notorious fics for the ship, i never read it until the summer. 

waiting for marriage by tuesday 

“In which Tony gets married and kidnapped in that order.

—

Tony Stark went to Vegas to cause a scandal.”

just super fun!

push you out (pull you back in) by @lovelystarker​

“So basically, Peter's kind of fucked. And not in the way that he wants to be-preferably by his mother's hot new boyfriend who has beautiful brown eyes and a disposition that's more than put-together. It wouldn't be so hard to ignore the crush, really it wouldn't, but Mr. Stark has practically moved in, so Peter can't avoid him if he wants to, and unlike his mom's past boyfriends, this one actually likes to spend time with him. So yeah, Peter's kind of fucked.”

just,,, wow. important to note that it is unfinished.

stucky:

you go to my head by alby_mangroves and brideofquiet

“Why would you do that for a man you don’t know?” Bucky asks.

Steve raises one slow eyebrow at him, then the other, till his expression turns from skepticism to disbelief. His forefinger and thumb reach into his shirt’s front pocket and draw out a wrinkled dollar bill.

Steve looks him in the eye when he says, very patiently, “For money, Bucky.”

40′s stucky is my favorite stucky

that boy is a problem by 2best friends

“In which a twinky little goth punk named Bucky puts a leash around Steve's dick and he's really into it.

(The leash is a metaphor. For now.)”

just porn

all the angels and the saints by speranza 

“In which Steve Rogers loses God and finds God and loses God, and also: Bucky.”

if it makes you cry, it’s probably good!

sugar sweet by colorcoated 

“College Student Bucky finds himself immediately attracted to Steve. He knows that Steve's a bit older than him, and that Steve himself is put off by the age difference. . . But that doesn't stop Bucky from wanting to climb him like a tree.”

the only slowburn i have tolerated 

my bucky by cleo4u2 and xantissa 

“Bucky finds a feral Alpha in the woods. Rather, the Alpha finds him. Bucky is sure it’s the end of his life as an independant Omega. It turns out to be the beginning of the strangest romance Bucky’s ever known.”

stony:

(i want you to see) the darkest side of me by ann2who

“In Monte Carlo, Steve meets the wealthy widower Anthony Stark. It’s love at first sight—at least for Steve—and he can’t believe his luck when Tony asks him to live at Stark Mansion, his large estate in Malibu. Never in his life had Steve thought something like this was possible… never had he been this happy. However, soon Steve realizes that Tony is still deeply troubled by the death of his first wife and haunted by the many ghosts she left behind. The longer Steve lives in her shadow, the more he understands that… He can never be what Tony’s wife had once been for him. And Tony might never truly love him.”

total mindfuck.

ironstrange:

let it be by lucifersfavoritechild

“While dealing with his son's car accident and a rapidly-dissolving marriage, Tony is drawn to Peter's surgeon, Dr. Stephen Strange.”

where severus snape is hot, not a stalker, and somehow gets the girl by utopiste

“Or: Peter Parker is sick and wants to cut his Neuroscience class. Tony just wants to help (and maybe date his son's hot teacher). Stephen Strange just wants to give his lecture in peace.”

miscellaneous:

geraskier: who needs plans anyways by NTK

“All witchers are alphas or betas by nature, since no omega has ever survived the Trial of the Grasses. Gerald has never had any problems with satisfying his needs on the occasional rut, for the whores from Poviss to Nilfgard were eager to be of service to a sturdy hunk like him. On the other hand, a certain omega/ bard/ occasional witcher tagalong has always made certain to acquire enough suppressants from local healers before setting out on a new adventure. That is, until the travels with his favourite White Wolf led the unlike pair into uncharted territory for longer than expected… life ensues”

philtriss: bound by sapphiresmoke

“Leashing involves a pupil being bound to their master in body, mind, and magic,” Philippa explained, folding her hands on the desk in front of her. “It is not something to undertake lightly, but if you accept, I will be able to share my magic with you, and instruct you in ways that would be otherwise be impossible if I were to only rely on verbal communication. It is intimate, it is at times invasive, but if you consent to this, Triss, it will make you vastlymore powerful, and from the look in your eyes, that seems to be exactly what you are looking for.”

vandermatthews: one more night like this would put me six feet under by jukeboxgraduate

“To be alongside the same person week after week, to share honesty and trust with someone day after day, is a rare treasure in a life that hinges on dishonesty. Hosea holds it close to his heart.”

din/cobb: every wave is a tidal if you hang around by wolfhalls 

“Din comes to Mos Pelgo, and finds a lot more than he was looking for.”

and finally, rough day by @no-droids​, because we all need to be a little indulgent sometimes.

#starker #stony #ironstrange #stucky #fic recs #geraskier #philtriss

[scoups4lyfe]

freaking WOOF y'all.

I would've started the revice mystery liveblog episodes sooner (today, hahaha)

but my older sister got into a fking terrible car accident cause nobody in this cursed town can fking dRIvE-

＼| ￣ヘ￣|／

I mean, she's ok. Nothing broken, no internal bleeding. THank God <333.

(She just got home, she's been in the ER since 8pm :// )

but damn.....fking SRSLY?????

that's the 4th car crash their family has been in just this month alone 💀💀💀💀. And it wasn't their fault any of those times.

I mean freaking BLESS that she was the only one in the car, because the milk jug that was sitting in the backseat was fking SLICED IN HALF. She decided last minute to leave my 7 month old nephew with my mom, and if she had brought him with-

wow.

See, I wouldn't be so LIVID rn if this was a rare occurrence. But its not just my sister whose had to deal with sh*tty fking drivers. Back in July of 2021, she was at the hospital y'know, giving birth, so me my mom and my younger sister had my 2 yr old niece.

When we were driving back to my older sister's house (to spend the night there with my niece and wait for news about my sister's labour); as our car was entering the intersection, this fking dude KEPT GOING and my mom panicked in the split second when she realized this dude wasn't going to stop and we were going to get hit, turned our car as much as she could, so that the side that got hit the most would be the driver's side.

(I was sitting behind my mom, but yeah it's 100% preferable for our side to get hit , because the passenger side had my younger sister in the front, and my 2 year old niece asleep in the back, and it was either get hit head-on, or get hit on the side)

The moment my mom realized we were gonna get hit, me and my sister realized it as well, cause my mom yelled on reflex, "HE ISN'T STOPPING-" and when they tell you that sh*t goes in slow-mo, they ain't lying.

Right before the car hit us, I moved sideways, and braced myself, my mom unfortunately didn't move herself sideways, and whacked her head pretty badly. And then,

AND THEN

the dude, look at us - you can see the shock on his face, I was closest cause their car literally crashed right into my door, and then we see his car start backing up and my younger sister starts flipping out

"HE'S FKING RUNNING! STOP HIM!!!"

(Reference: My mom was hit at this same exact spot, on the same road, like 4 months earlier, and their car got totaled, and THAT mfer ALSO ran. 💀💀💀💀. That time I wasn't in the car, but my younger sister, and my younger brother *were*.)

And then maybe a MONTH before that July incident, my little's sis's -now BF, got into a car crash, because some idiot didn't stop and hit them head on. At the time, my sis and mom were driving past and seen the ambulances and the car, literally had to get onto a completely different road it was *THAT* bad. Anyways, my lil sis saw a post about the car crash from the perspective of the driver on her male friend's snapchat and was like ???????? 'That wasn't YOU was it?'

"Oh, yeah."

lol that's how they started talking

Anyways. What the F*CK is wrong with the drivers in our town.

#ur sister is in the ER #I mean thankfully #none of us ever got injured too badly #just bruises #so idk #guess God's looking out lol #man this sh*t makes me paranoid :// #Its terrifying to think if my baby nephews or nieces were in the car #they wouldn't have survived #idk if our family has REALLY sh*tty luck #or really good luck #anyways #I would've started liveblogging before uh sunday #but then my dad gets home and is like #and I was like WHAT!!!?? #anyways stay safe y'all #kamen rider revice #kamen rider revice spinoff #kamen rider revice the mystery #inbetween mystery baths #Soup of life #lifeblogging I guess #kronthescoup #revice #ikki why is ur demon so cringe #my thougts

[wherearemyglassesbro]

I have a question for the lawyer AU, if that's okay? For each of the defense attorneys and prosecutors, do they have an MO when they're in court? And/or, do any of them get really nervous before cases/in the courtroom and have ways to calm themselves down?

AYYYYY A LAWYER AU ASK!!!! ITS BEEN 84 YEARS!!!! SINCE IVE GOTTEN TO TALK ABOUT THIS AU LETS FUCKIN GOOOOOOOO!!!!!

Defense attorney Kirkland: Arthur is always a wreck before trials. He’s jittery and nervous, he rarely gets any sleep before trials so he’s up around 3am, pacing around his apartment and rereading every paper he can get his hands on. He practices talking in the mirror and washes his face multiple times to keep himself wide awake. Copious amounts of tea are consumed as well as an everything bagel....mmm...yum. He’s at the courthouse hours beforehand, sitting in his car reviewing paperwork. Again. In the courtroom, Arthur is very persistent. He’s always pressing for more information and wording things juuuuuust right in order to get the answers he needs from the witnesses. He often refers back to paperwork since that stuff is written out and is just...easy to go back to. He also just asks a lot of questions in general and once he gets answers, he’s ready to talk. This guy can talk for hours and hours, he’s great at it. He scores extra points with the jury just because he’s easy to listen to and trustworthy

Defense attorney Jones: Alfred isn’t a full fledged attorney yet, he’s shadowing Arthur so whatever Art does, he has to do. He has to get up at the butt crack of dawn to meet Art in the courthouse parking lot. Al gets himself a muffin and a Pink Drink and he’s ready to do. He’ll sit on the hood of Art’s car and just listen to him ramble lmao. Alfred is a very friendly guy, he’s open and looks trustworthy. He makes an effort to never look angry in court! He thinks getting upset or angry looks bad for the defense and he isn’t entirely wrong. He’s nice while asking questions, he asks things that are worded in a certain way so he’ll get an answer he’s looking for! He doesn’t get to talk too much since again, he’s still shadowing Art, but when he does everything is calculated. Cause Al is young....but...smart :)

Defense attorney Herdarvey: I did not spell her name right but anyway, Eliza is a feminist icon in her workspace. She is super organized and has very case she’s ever worked with/on in color coded binders. She is super intelligent and hard working!! In court, you’ll see her taking notes or flipping through her binder or twirling her pen between her fingers while she listens to the prosecution or the witness testimonies. She isn’t harsh while conducting cross examinations but she is very cunning when she wants to be. She’ll ask questions to purposely make the witness admit the truth which is very impressive, especially if the Braginskys are the prosecutors cause they...uh...’coach’ witnesses on what to say sometimes. Before going to court she drinks tea in her car by herself while listening to Led Zepplin to get fuckin HYPED UP!!! Then she’ll meet with her client again to hype them up ‘it’ll be okay! We’re gonna win this one, we have it in the bag no worries’. Then she cracks her neck, knuckles and knees. Now she’s ready to go.

Prosecutor Edelstein: Roderich has a SET routine for court days and he will get very cranky if he cannot fufil his routine. He goes to bed at 10pm and wakes up at 4am. He eats a croissant with some tea and then goes over the case file, autopsy report, evidence, anything he can. At 6, he gets ready for the day. At 6:45, he’s in the car debating with himself throughout the entire drive to the courthouse. He meets with his team and witnesses, who he makes get there early too, to talk and reassure. He’ll pace around the parking lot, or inside if it’s too hot, until his knees hurt lmao. He always takes three ibuprofen before any trial because he anticipates getting a headache. Now its showtime. Roderich is a man of mystery, he always has a trick up his sleeve. Vaugely worded questions to trip up the defense, additional evidence to present, hes done it all. He’s is a very fantastic talker, he can talk for hours and hours and to be honest??? He always sounds like he knows what he’s talking about. The jury loves that, especially if he’s going up against Kirkland or Jones, the jury usually ends up favoring Rod solely because he explains his points better or something like that.

Prosecutor Braginskya: Nat is a very strict lady, she has a VERY specific way of doing things. Like Roderich, she’s high strung and bossy. She sends emails out first thing in the morning to make sure that her team is ready to go. Usually they’re not at 5am. Cue instant frustration. She gives herself a temple massage and has an eclair before heading in. Early of course. She walks slow laps around the court building, muttering to herself, she’s walking in tennis shoes and switches back to heels once she goes inside. She doesn’t get nervous really but she feels a lot of pressure before a trial. She is very persistent when working against the defense, she always hurries to aid the witnesses so they don’t slip up and she often accuses the defense of badgering her witnesses. She is a very smart woman but she isn’t the most fantastic talker in the world. Lawyers talk for a living and Nat is just fine at it! She isn’t the best but she makes up for it with her professional, serious aura

Prosecutor Braginsky: Ivan...oh Ivan. Ivan wakes up at 6:30 on the dot, irons his suit and styled his hair. He doesn’t eat before trials because his stomach hurts when he’s nervous and that wouldn’t help him very much. He does drink a lot of water though! And crunches the ice. He’s at the courthouse 30 minutes before the trial, which is later than any other prosecutor, but he’s still early enough to consult his team! He talks to the witnesses again and reminds them not to talk TOO much or give TOO much information because ‘the defense will start to get to them’. In the courtroom, Ivan is always happy to listen to the defense. He always lets them talk and talk because when they do that, they sometimes talk themselves into a corner. Now thats when he strikes “oh? You’re sure it happened that way? Well I was under the impression....” he rarely objects or yells but he is intimidating without having to be loud. He smiles through most trials, not a super wide one but a soft, confident smile.

Prosecutor Bonnefoy: Francis is not very organized at all but he makes it work. He has his briefcase full of papers...and they’re out of order. Before every court day he gets up super early to pace around his apartment while yelling about why he thinks this person he’s prosecuting is guilty. An advantage he has is that he memorizes things very quick so even though he most likley lost his copy of the accident report, he remembers the whole thing. After pacing around for an hour he’ll leave, taking the freeway into work. He sings along with an opera CD in his fancy sports car while going fuckin 95mph. By the time he gets to the courtroom he’s no longer nervous. He consults his team, goes over the papers he can find, makes fun of the defense and then it’s time to fuckin go. He does a lot of talking which usually makes the defense nervous. He’s confident in everything he says and everything his witnesses say. He doesn’t coach them the Braginsky way but he does assure them ‘you don’t tell them anything they don’t need to know cher, really. If you give too many details they’ll rip you apart! That’s the way the defense works. So be vague when you can but not too vague. Got it?’. He makes a show of his prosecution really but it’s a strategy that works. He’s won a lot of cases that way

Judge Beilschmidt: I’m including Lud cause I didn’t want him to feel left out :) Before every case he hears, he always likes to sit in silence for a few minutes to clear his mind. He has deep breathing exercises on his phone so he’ll just listen for about 10 minutes, giving himself time to relax before the chaos begins. He then collects his papers, straightens them out and lint rolls his judge robes. Then he’s all ready to go. When in court, he is totally unbiased. He was trained to be unbiased and he is always willing to hear both sides so he tries to be quiet while others talk but if things get too rowdy he doesn’t hesitate to slam that gavel down “NO YELLING IN MY COURTROOM!!!!” Oop- so much for quiet. After hearing a case and the guilty or not guilty verdict is delivered, he almost always feels his stomach drop all funny cause he always worries if he did the right thing. His brain says yes, that was the right call. But deep down he’s always afraid that he’s a bad judge. When he goes home he lets his dogs and after a tough case, he makes himself a bowl of chocolate ice cream with whipped cream on top.

#lawyer au :) #aph #hetalia #ask away! #headcanons #hetalia headcanons #asks #aph france #aph england #aph america #aph russia #aph Belarus #aph austria #aph germany #aph hungary #hetalia writing #always up for hc requests!

[mhdiaries]

Zombie Shake Meowlody & Purrsephone Diary

Editor’s Note: This written conversation was discovered while investigating an incident that involved an outbreak of a strange zombie-like behaviour amongst the non-zombie student population at Monster High.

I can’t believe you left me to fend for myself last period. If not for my werecat-like reflexes, I would have been totally trampled in the hall. 

Pffttt... I was trying to keep my own tail out from underneath that rocking chair of chaos and I did try to stay with you, but Manny was breathing down my fur doing his best impurrsonation of a one-monster stampede. I had to duck into Mr. D’eath’s office, although I think trampling would have been less painful. He is deadfully boring.

I heard the chaos was caused by something that went wrong in one of the Mad Science labs. I haven’t seen that kind of panic since Heath ran screaming through the halls yelling we were under attack by giant robots with undeath rays. I thought purrhaps Toralei was doing some Claws and Effect research, but she was running just like the rest of us and she didn’t have that, “I can’t wait to tell you what just happened” look on her face, so it must not have been her doing. Hmmm...

Now that Slo Mo is the new student dis-embody president, I suppose it was just a matter of time before we would all be forced to endure a zombie themed dance. The whole idea is just purrfectly dreadful to me. I think my idea for an ice scream social was much more appealing. I don’t understand why are we even dressing up like zombies at all? I mean, zombies dress just like every other monster at MH, although they don’t seem to be big on buttons.

I don’t understand why you’ve got your fur all stoked the wrong way over this dance. You didn’t complain, well, not as much as you’re doing now, when the dance theme was polka dots and you hate polka dots.

Really? You’re going to bring up the polka dot dance? You know polka dots clash with my stripes, and it’s just not a good look for me. I would think you, of all monsters, would appreciate that.

I do appreciate the stylistic conundrum in which we found ourselves relative to that particularly themed soiree. I am merely reacting to your obvious intransigence toward the coming festivities.

Conundrum? Soiree? Intransigence? Did a thesaurus bite you, or did you bump your head in that stampede?

Your attempts at hilarity notwithstanding, it is indeed true that zombies are not unique in their fashion choices, but this is going to be an evening for adorning oneself in zombie couture. It will also provide an opportunity to embrace the very spirit of zombie-hood and the intrinsic joy of being a zombie more than anything else.

Are you coming down with werecat scratch fever or something, ‘cause you’re really starting to freak my out, and not in a good way.

While I appreciate your concern for my well being, I must assure you that I am most certainly in perfect health. 

You could have fooled me. I mean, I don’t think you could be moving any slower. You almost made us late for this class.

I was not being slow, I was being deliberate and purrposeful. You should try it sometime. I think it would be ghoul for you. Maybe the zombies are onto something by moving through unlife at their own pace. In fact, by slowing things down and focusing, I believe I have now come up with two purrfect fashion solutions for the dance.

Solutions? I was unaware there was even a problem. Wait a minute... OH.MY.GHOUL. That zombie bug Ghoulia accidently released on the school has infected you! I am reporting this to Headless Headmistress Bloodgood immediately and... hey, are those the shoes we will be wearing? I must say they certainly combine elements of both the freaky and the fabulous.

Maybe, I should reevaluate my initial concerns regarding the theme of this dance. Purrhaps, a deliberate and purrposeful approach to unlife is something I should try.

I know you would assent. Now wait until you hear what I have in mind for our hair and makeup. It might be expedient for us to begin our prepurrations early, however, since I am finding being deliberate and purrposeful does require extra time.

#monster high #monster high diary #zombie shake #meowlody #purrsephone

[za3k]

2020 Videogames

In 2020 I’m newly retired, so I’ve had free time. I think it’s fun to do reviews, so without further ado here’s every video game I played in 2020!

I recommend:

(4/5) Among Us – Very fun. It’s only fun with voice chat with friends, so I’ve only gotten to play once or twice. I’ve been watching it more than playing it. Also free to play for mobile gamers–I’m tired of the “everyone buys a copy” model of group gameplay.

(4/5) Brogue. Brogue is an ascii-art roguelike. It’s great, and it has a nice difficulty ramp. It’s a good “quick break” game. I play it in preference to other roguelikes partly because I haven’t done it to death yet, and partly because I don’t need a numpad?

(4/5) Cook Serve Delicious 3. One of the more fun games I played this year. You get really into it, but I had trouble relaxing and paying attention to the real world when I played too much, haha. I own but haven’t played the first two–I gather this is pretty much just a refinement.

(4/5) Green Hell. Price tag is a bit high for the number of hours I got out of it, but I haven’t finished the story. Great graphics, and the BEST map design I’ve seen in a 3D game in a long time. It feels like a real place, with reasonable geography instead of copy-pasted tiles. I love that as you walk along, you can just spot a cultivated area from the rest of the jungle–it feels more like it’s treating me like an adult than most survival games. Everything still gets highlighted if you can pick it up. I played the survival mode, which was okay but gets old quickly. I started the story mode–I think it would be fine, but it has some LONG unskippable scenes at the start, including a very hand-holdy tutorial, that I think they should have cut. I did start getting into the story and was having fun, but I stopped. I might finish the game some time.

(4/5) Hyperrogue. One of my recent favorites. The dev has made a fair number of highly experimental games, most of which are a total miss with me, but this one is fun. I do wish the early game wasn’t quite as repetitive. Failing another solution, I might actually want this not to be permadeath, or to have a save feature? I bought it on steam to support the dev and get achievements, but it’s also available a version or two behind free, which is how I tried it. Constantly getting updates and new worlds.

(4/5) Minecraft – Compact Claustrophobia modpack. Fun idea, nice variety. After one expansion felt a little samey, and it was hard to start with two people. I’d consider finishing this pack.

(4/5) Overcooked 2. Overcooked 2 is just more levels for Overcooked. The foods in the second game is more fun, and it has better controls and less bugs. If you’re considering playing Overcooked, I recommend just starting with the second game, despite very fun levels in the first. I especially appreciate that the second game didn’t just re-use foods from the first.

(4/5) Please Don’t Press Anything. A unique little game where you try to get all the endings. I had a lot of fun with this one, but it could have used some kind of built-in hints like Reventure. Also, it had a lot of red herrings. Got it for $2, which it was well worth.

(5/5) Reventure. Probably the best game new to me this year. It’s a short game where you try to get each of about 100 endings. The art and writing are cute and funny. The level design is INCREDIBLE. One thing I found interesting is the early prototype–if I had played it, I would NOT have imagined it would someday be any fun at all, let alone as amazing as it is. As a game designer I found that interesting! I did 100% complete this one–there’s a nice in-game hint system, but there were still 1-3 “huh” puzzles, especially in the post-game content, one of which I had to look up. It’s still getting updates so I’m hoping those will be swapped for something else.

(5/5) Rimworld. Dwarf fortress, but with good cute graphics, set in the Firefly universe. Only has 1-10 pawns instead of hundreds of dwarves. Basically Dwarf Fortress but with a good UI. I wish you could do a little more in Rimworld, but it’s a fantastic, relaxing game.

(5/5) Slay the Spire. Probably the game I played most this year. A deckbuilding adventure through a series of RPG fights. A bit luck-based, but relaxing and fun. I like that you can play fast or slow. Very, very well-designed UI–you can really learn how things work. My favorite part is that because it’s singleplayer, it’s really designed to let you build a game-breaking deck. That’s how it should be!

(4/5) Stationeers. I had a lot of fun with this one. It’s similar to Space Engineers but… fun. It has better UI by a mile too, even if it’s not perfect. I lost steam after playing with friends and then going back to being alone, as I often do for base-building games. Looks like you can genuinely make some complicated stuff using simple parts. Mining might not be ideal.

(5/5) Spy Party. One of my favorite games. Very fun, and an incredibly high skill ceiling. There’s finally starting to be enough people to play a game with straners sometimes. Bad support for “hot seat”–I want to play with beginners in person, and it got even harder with the introduction of an ELO equivalent and removing the manual switch to use “beginner” gameplay.

(4/5) Telling Lies. A storytelling game. The core mechanic is that you can use a search engine for any phrase, and it will show the top 5 survellance footage results for that. The game internally has transcripts of every video. I didn’t really finish the game, but I had a lot of fun with it. The game was well-made. I felt the video acting didn’t really add a huge amount, and they could have done a text version, but I understand it wouldn’t have had any popular appeal. The acting was decent. There’s some uncomfortable content, on purpose.

(4/5) Totally Accurate Battle Simulator (TABS). Delightful. Very silly, not what you’d expect from the name. What everyone should have been doing with physics engines since they were invented. Imagine that when a caveman attacks, the club moves on its own and the caveman just gets ragdolled along, glued to it. Also the caveman and club have googley eyes. Don’t try to win or it will stop being fun. Learn how to turn on slo-mo and move the camera.

(4/5) We Were Here Together. Lots of fun. I believe the second game out of three. Still some crashes and UI issues. MUCH better puzzles and the grpahics are gorgeous. They need to fix the crashes or improve the autosave, we ended up replaying a lot of both games from crashes. It’s possible I should be recommending the third game but I haven’t played it yet.

The Rest

(3/5) 5D Chess with Multiverse Time Travel. More fun that it sounds. If you play to mess around and win by accident, it’s pretty good. Definitely play with a second human player, though.

(1.5/5) 7 billion humans. Better than the original, still not fun. Soulless game about a soulless, beige corporation. Just play Zachtronics instead. If you’re on a phone and want to engage your brain, play Euclidea.

(3/5) A Dark Room. Idle game.

(1/5) Amazing Cultivation Simulator. A big disappointment. Bad english voice acting which can’t be turned off, and a long, unskippable tutorial. I didn’t get to actual gameplay. I like Rimworld and cultivation novels so I had high hopes.

(3/5) ADOM (Steam version) – Fun like the original, which I would give 5/5. Developed some major issues on Linux, but I appreciate that there’s a graphical version available, one of my friends will play it now.

(4/5) agar.io – Good, but used to be better. Too difficult to get into games now. Very fun and addictive gameplay.

(3/5) Amorous – Furry dating sim. All of the hot characters are background art you can’t interact with, and the characters you can actually talk to are a bunch of sulky nerds who for some reason came to a nightclub. I think it was free, though.

(0/5) Apis. Alpha game, AFAIK I was the first player. Pretty much no fun right now (to the point of not really being a game yet), but it could potentially become fun if the author puts in work.

(4/5) Autonauts. I played a ton of Autonauts this year, almost finished it, which is rare for me. My main complaint is that it’s fundamentally supposed to be a game about programming robots, but I can’t actually make them do more than about 3 things, even as a professional programmer. Add more programming! It can be optional, that’s fine. They’re adding some kind of tower defense waves instead, which is bullshit. Not recommended because it’s not for everyone.

(3/5) A-Z Inc. Points for having the guts to have a simple game. At first this looked like just the bones of Swarm Simulator, but the more you look at the UI and the ascension system, the worse it actually is. I would regularly reset because I found out an ascension “perk” actually made me worse off.

(5/5) Beat Saber. Great game, and my favorite way to stay in shape early this year. Oculus VR only, if you have VR you already have this game so no need to recommend. Not QUITE worth getting a VR set just to play it at current prices.

(1/5) Big Tall Small. Good idea, but no fun to play. Needed better controls and level design, maybe some art.

(0.5/5) Blush Blush. Boring.

(3/5) Business Shark. I had too much fun with this simple game. All you do is just eat a bunch of office workers.

(3/5) chess.com. Turns out I like chess while I’m high?

(3/5) Circle Empires Rivals. Decent, more fun than the singleplayer original. It shouldn’t really have been a separate game from Circle Empires, and I’m annoyed I couldn’t get it DRM-free like the original.

(3/5) Cross Virus. By Dan-box. Really interesting puzzle mechanics.

(4/5) Cultist Simulator. Really fun to learn how to play–I love games that drop you in with no explanation. Great art and writing, I wish I could have gotten their tarot deck. Probably the best gameplay “ambience” I’ve seen–getting a card that’s labeled “fleeting sense of radiance” that disappears in 5 seconds? Great. Also the core stats are very well thought out for “feel” and real-life accuracy–dread (depression) conquers fascination (mania), etc. It has a few gameplay gotchas, but they’re not too big–layout issues, inability to go back to skipped text, or to put your game in an unwinnable state early on). Unfortunately it’s a “roguelike”, and it’s much too slow-paced and doesn’t have enough replay value, so it becomes a horrible, un-fun grind when you want to actually win. I probably missed the 100% ending but I won’t be going back to get it. I have no idea who would want to play this repeatedly. I’m looking forward to the next game from the same studio though! I recommend playing a friend’s copy instead of buying.

(2/5) Darkest Dungeon. It was fine but I don’t really remember it.

(2/5) Dicey Dungeons. Okay deck-building roguelike gameplay (with an inventory instead of a deck). Really frustrating, unskippably slow difficulty curve at the start. I played it some more this year and liked it better because I had a savegame. I appreciate having several character classes, but they should unlock every difficulty from the start.

(2/5) Diner Bros. Basically just a worse Overcooked. I didn’t like the controls, and it felt too repetitive with only one diner.

(2/5) Don’t Eat My Mind You Stupid Monster. Okay art and idea, the gameplay wasn’t too fun for me.

(2/5) Don’t Starve – I’ve played Don’t Stave maybe 8 different times, and it’s never really gripped me, I always put it back down. It’s slow, a bit grindy, and there’s no bigger goal–all you can do is live.

(3/5) Don’t Starve Together – Confusingly, Don’t Starve Together can be played alone. It’s Don’t Starve, plus a couple of the expansions. This really could be much more clearly explained.

(1/5) Elemental Abyss – A deck-builder, but this time it’s grid-based tactics. Really not all that fun. Just play Into the Abyss instead or something.

(1/5) Else Heart.Break() – I was excited that this might be a version of “Hack N’ Slash” from doublefine that actually delivered and let you goof around with the world. I gave it up in the first ten minutes, because the writing and characters drove me crazy, without getting to hacking the world.

(2/5) Everything is Garbage. Pretty good for a game jam game. Not a bad use of 10 minutes. I do think it’s probably possible to make the game unwinnable, and the ending is just nothing.

(1/5) Evolve. Idle game, not all that fun. I take issue with the mechanic in Sharks, Kittens, and this where buying your 15th fence takes 10^15 wood for some reason.

(4/5) Exapunks. Zachtronics has really been killing it lately, with Exapunks and Opus Magnum. WONDERFUL art and characters during story portions, and much better writing. The gameplay is a little more varied than in TIS-100 or the little I played of ShenZen I/O. My main complaint about Zachtronics games continues to be, that I don’t want to be given a series of resource-limited puzzles (do X, but without using more than 10 programming instructions). Exapunks is the first game where it becomes harder to do something /at all/, rather than with a particular amount of resources, but it’s still not there for me. Like ShenZen, they really go for a variety of hardware, too. Can’t recommend this because it’s really only for programmers.

(1/5) Exception. Programming game written by some money machine mobile games company. Awful.

(4/5) Factorio. Factorio’s great, but for me it doesn’t have that much replay value, even with mods. I do like their recent updates, which included adding blueprints from the start of the game, improving belt sorting, and adding a research queue. We changed movement speed, made things visually always day, and adding a small number of personal construction robots from the start this run. I’m sure if you’d like factorio you’ve played it already.

(3/5) Fall Guys – I got this because it was decently fun to watch. Unfortunately, it’s slightly less fun to play. Overall, there’s WAY too much matchmaking waiting considering the number of players, and the skill ceiling is very low on most of the games, some of which are essentially luck (I’m looking at you, team games).

(3/5) Forager – Decent game. A little too much guesswork in picking upgrades–was probably a bit more fun on my second play because of that. Overall, nice graphics and a cute map, but the gameplay could use a bit of work.

(3/5) Getting Over It – Funny idea, executed well. Pretty sure my friends and I have only gotten through 10% of the game, and all hit about the same wall (the first tunnel)

(3/5) Guild of Dungeoneering – Pretty decent gameplay. I feel like it’s a bit too hard for me, but that’s fine. Overall I think it could use a little more cute/fun art, I never quite felt that motivated.

(1/5) Hardspace: Shipbreakers. Okay, I seriously didn’t get to play this one, but I had GAMEBREAKING issues with my controller, which is a microsoft X-box controller for PC–THE development controller.

(2/5) Helltaker. All right art, meh gameplay. But eh, it’s free!

(3/5) Hot Lava. Decent gameplay. Somehow felt like the place that made this had sucked the souls out of all the devs first–no one cared about the story or characters. It’s a game where the floor is made out of lava, with a saturday morning cartoon open, so that was a really an issue. Admirable lack of bugs, though. I’m a completionist so I played the first world a lot to get all the medals, and didn’t try the later ones.

(3/5) House Flipper – Weird, but I had fun. I wish the gameplay was a little more unified–it felt like a bunch of glued-together minigames.

(2/5) Hydroneer. Utterly uninspiring. I couldn’t care about making progress at all, looked like a terrible grind to no benefit.

(1/5) io. Tiny game, I got it on Steam, also available on phone. Basically a free web flash game, but for money. Not good enough to pay the $1 I paid. Just a bit of a time-killer.

(3/5) Islanders – All you do is place buildings and get points. Not particularly challenging, but relaxing. Overall I liked it.

(3/5) Jackbox – I played this online with a streamer. Jackbox has always felt a little bit soulless money grab to me, but it’s still all right. I like that I can play without having a copy–we need more games using this purchase model.

(3/5) Life is Feudal – Soul-crushingly depressing and grindy, which I knew going in. I thought it was… okay, but I really want an offline play mode (Yes, I know there’s an unsupported single-player game, but it’s buggier and costs money). UI was pretty buggy, and I think hunting might literally be impossible.

(2/5) Minecraft – Antimatter Chemistry. Not particularly fun.

(3/5) Minecraft – ComputerCraft. I played a pack with just ComputerCraft and really nothing else. Was a little slow, would have been more fun with more of an audience. I love the ComputerCraft mod, I just didn’t have a great experience playing my pack I made.

(3/5) Minecraft – Foolcraft 3. Fun, a bit buggy. Honestly I can’t remember it too well.

(1/5) Minecraft – Manufactio. Looked potentially fun, but huge bugs and performance issues, couldn’t play.

(4/5) Minecraft – Tekkit. Tekkit remains one of my favorite Minecraft modpacks.

(3/5) Minecraft – Valhelsia 2. I remember this being fun, but I can’t remember details as much as I’d like. I think it was mostly based around being the latest version of minecraft?

(4/5) Minecraft – Volcano Block. Interesting, designed around some weird mods I hadn’t used. I could have used more storage management or bulk dirt/blocks early in the game–felt quite cramped. Probably got a third of the way through the pack. I got novelty value out of it, but I wouldn’t have enjoyed it if I had ever used the plant mod before–it’s a very fixed, linear progression.

(5/5) Minit. This is a weird, small game. I actually had a lot of fun with it. Then I 100% completed it, which was less fun but I still had a good time overall.

(3/5) Monster Box. By Dan-box. One of two Dan-box games I played a lot of. Just visually appealing, the gameplay isn’t amazing. Also, Dan-box does some great programming–this is a game written in 1990 or so, and it can render hundreds of arrows in the air smoothly in a background tab.

(3/5) Monster Train. A relatively fun deckbuilding card game. It can’t run well on my computer, which is UNACCEPTABLE–this is a card game with 2D graphics. My MICROWAVE should run this shit in 2020. Ignoring that, the gameplay style (summon monsters, MTG style) just isn’t my cup of tea.

(2/5) Moonlighter. Felt like it was missing some inspiration, just didn’t have a sense of “fun”. The art was nice. The credits list is surprisingly long.

(2/5) Muse Dash. All right, a basic rhythm game. Not enough variety to the game play, and everything was based around perfect or near-perfect gameplay, which makes things less fun for me.

(3/5) NES games – various. Dr Mario, Ice Climbers. Basically, I got some Chinese handheld “gameboy” that has all the NES games preloaded on it. Overall it was a great purchase.

(2/5) Noita. “The Powder Game” by Dan-Box, as a procedurally generated platformer with guns. Lets you design your own battle spells. Despite the description, you really still can’t screw around as much as I’d like. I also had major performance issues

(3/5) Observation. I haven’t played this one as much as I’d like, I feel like it may get better. Storytelling, 3D game from the point of view of the AI computer on a space station. I think I might have read a book it’s based on, unfortunately.

(2/5) One Step From Eden. This is a deck-building combat tactics game. I thought it was turn-based, but it’s actually realtime. I think if it was turn-based I would have liked it. The characters were a bit uninspired.

(1/5) Orbt XL. Very dull. I paid $0.50 for it, it was worth that.

(4/5) Opus Magnum. Another great game from Zachtronics, along with Exapunks they’re really ramping up. This is the third execution of the same basic concept. I’d like to see Zachtronics treading new ground more as far as gameplay–that said, it is much improved compared to the first two iterations. The art, writing, and story were stellar on the other hand.

(3/5) Out of Space. Fun idea, you clean a spaceship. It’s never that challenging, and it has mechanics such that it gets easier the more you clean, rather than harder. Good but not enough replay value. Fun with friends the first few times. The controls are a little wonky.

(1/5) Outpost (tower defense game). I hate all tower defense.

(3/5) Overcooked. Overcooked is a ton of fun.

(4/5) Powder Game – Dan-box. I played this in reaction to not liking Noita. It’s fairly old at this point. Just a fun little toy.

(1/5) Prime Mover – Very cool art, the gameplay put me to sleep immediately. A “circuit builder” game but somehow missing any challenge or consistency.

(2/5) Quest for Glory I. Older, from 1989. Didn’t really play this much, I couldn’t get into the writing, and the pseudo-photography art was a little jarring.

(4/5) Raft. I played this in beta for free on itch.io, and had a lot of fun. Not enough changed that it was really worth a replay, but it has improved, and I got to play with a second player. Not a hard game, which I think was a good thing. The late game they’ve expanded, but it doesn’t really add much. The original was fun and so was this.

(3/5) Satisfactory. I honestly don’t know how I like this one–I didn’t get too far into it.

(4/5) Scrap Mechanic. I got this on a recommendation from a player who played in creative. I only tried the survival mode–that mode is not well designed, and their focuses for survival are totally wrong. I like the core game, you can actually build stuff. If I play again, I’ll try the creative mode, I think.

(3.5/5) Shapez.io. A weird, abstracted simplification of Factorio. If I hadn’t played factorio and half a dozen copies, I imagine this would have been fun, but it’s just more of the same. Too much waiting–blueprints are too far into the game, too.

(2.5/5) Simmiland. Okay, but short. Used cards for no reason. For a paid game, I wanted more gameplay out of it?

(0.5/5) Snakeybus. The most disappointing game I remember this year. Someone made “Snake” in 3D. There are a million game modes and worlds to play in. I didn’t find anything I tried much fun.

(1/5) Soda Dungeon. A “mobile” (read: not fun) style idle game. Patterned after money-grab games, although I don’t remember if paid progress was actually an option. I think so.

(4/5) Spelunky. The only procedurally generated platformer I’ve ever seen work. Genuinely very fun.

(4/5) Spelunky 2. Fun, more of an upgrade of new content than a new game. Better multiplayer. My computer can’t run later levels at full speed.

(1/5) Stick Ranger 2. Dan-box. Not much fun.

(3/5) Superliminal. Fun game. A bit short for the pricetag.

(3/5) Tabletop Simulator – Aether’s End: Legacy. Interesting, a “campaign” (series of challenge bosses and pre-written encounters) deckbuilding RPG. I like the whole “campaign RPG boardgame” idea. This would have worked better with paper, there were some rough edges in both the game instructions and the port to Tabletop Simulator.

(4/5) Tabletop Simulator – The Captain is Dead. Very fun. I’d love to play with more than 2 people. Tabletop simulator was so-so for this one.

(2/5) Tabletop Simulator – Tiny Epic Mechs. You give your mech a list of instructions, and it does them in order. Arena fight. Fun, but I think I could whip up something at least as good.

(3/5) The Council. One of the only 3D games I finished. It’s a story game, where you investigate what’s going on and make various choices. It’s set in revolutionary france, at the Secret World Council that determines the fate of the world. It had a weak ending, with less choice elements than the rest of the game so far, which was a weird decision. Also, it has an EXCRUTIATINGLY bad opening scene, which was also weird. The middle 95% of the game I enjoyed, although the ending went on a little long. The level of background knowledge expected of the player swung wildly–they seemed to expect me to know who revolutionary French generals were with no explanation, but not Daedalus and the Minotaur. The acting was generally enjoyable–there’s a lot of lying going on in the game and it’s conveyed well. The pricetag is too high to recommend.

(0/5) The Grandma’s Recipe (Unus Annus). This game is unplayably bad–it’s just a random pixel hunt. Maybe it would be fun if you had watched the video it’s based on.

(3/5) The Room. Pretty fun! I think this is really designed for a touchscreen, but I managed to play it on my PC. Played it stoned, which I think helps with popular puzzle games–it has nice visuals but it’s a little too easy.

(3/5) This Call May Be Recorded. Goofy experimental game.

(4/5) TIS-100. Zachtronics. A programming game. I finally got done with the first set of puzzles and into the second this year. I had fun, definitely not for everyone.

(3/5) Trine. I played this 2-player. I think the difficulty was much better 2-player, but it doesn’t manage 2 players getting separated well. Sadly we skipped the story, which seemed like simple nice low-fantasy. Could have used goofier puzzles, it took itself a little too seriously and the levels were a bit same-y.

(2/5) Unrailed. Co-op railroad building game. It was okay but there wasn’t base-building. Overall not my thing. I’d say I would prefer something like Overcooked if it’s going to be timed? Graphics reminded me of autonauts.

(2/5) Vampire Night Shift. Art game. Gameplay could have used a bit of polish. Short but interesting.

(4/5) Wayward. To date, the best survival crafting system I’ve seen. You can use any pointy object and stick-like object, together with glue or twine, to make an arrow. The UI is not great, and there’s a very counter-intuitive difficulty system. You need to do a little too much tutorial reading, and it could use more goals. Overall very fun. Under constant development, so how it plays a given week is a crapshoot. The steam version finally works for me (last time I played it was worse than the free online alpha, now it’s the same or better). I recomend playing the free online version unless you want to support the author.

(1/5) We Need to Go Deeper. Multiplayer exploration game in a sub, with sidescrolling battle. Somehow incredibly unfun, together with high pricetag. Aesthetics reminded me of Don’t Starve somehow.

(2/5) We Were Here. Okay 2-player puzzle game. Crashed frequently, and there were some “huh” puzzles and UI. Free.

(3/5) Yes, your grace. Gorgeous pixel art graphics. The story is supposed to be very player-dependent, but I started getting the feeling that it wasn’t. I didn’t quite finish the game but I think I was well past halfway. Hard to resume after a save, you forget things. I got the feeling I wouldn’t replay it, which is a shame because it’s fun to see how things go differently in a second play with something like this.

These are not all new to me, and very few came out in 2020. I removed any games I don’t remember and couldn’t google (a fair number, I play a lot of game jam games) as well as any with pornographic content.

2020 Videogames was originally published on Optimal Prime

#games #review #reviews #videogames #yearly review #cross-posted-from-blog

[is0gild]

Ice Cream and Fire Oven Pizza - Chapter 4

Pairing: Elsa x Lea/Axel || Side Pairing: Riku x OC

Summary: Modern AU. She's an introvert ball of nerves who works at Ice Palace, a mall food court ice cream shop. He's the outgoing, sassy goofball who works at the Pizza Planet across the way. Hilarity, snark, and fluffy romcom hijinks ensue.

Word Count: 3,861

FIRST CHAPTER || PREVIOUS CHAPTER || NEXT CHAPTER

Credit for super friggin’ cute and super friggin’ amazing cover art goes to the super friggin’ talented ky-jane here on tumblr!

So there I was.

Liplocked with a complete and total stranger.

A ridiculously and obscenely attractive stranger.

A fact I hadn’t been fully aware of nor really all that inclined to notice until right then, while stuck in said liplock.

I think it’s some sort of universal law, actually. That the more one embarrasses themselves in front of another person, the more insanely beautiful that person ends up being. I don’t make the rules. It’s just science.

These were the critical thoughts that were running through my head in that second.

One single second. That’s how long the kiss lasted. Short when you really think about it in the grand scheme of things. But at the time? It had felt like an absolute eternity. One miserable, mortifying eternity. It’d seem that while I hadn’t randomly gained the ability to reverse time in that moment like I had silently prayed for, it was a distinct possibility that I had somehow magically learned how to slow it down, but only to make humiliating incidents such as this last excruciatingly long.

Worst. Super power. Ever.

Green, by the way. 

The color of his eyes. In case you had been wondering.

I hadn’t been. Not particularly. But it was kind of hard not to notice when those eyes were all in your face and bright and vibrant and-

...was that… guyliner? 

I’d heard of such a thing, but I’d never seen it in practice until now. It actually looked kind of amazing. Wow, how did he get the wings to look so… so swoopy and-

Wait. Hold up. I smelled pepperoni.

I suppose that made sense. He did work at a pizza place, after all.

There was the scent of flour too.

That also tracked, what with him having just dropped dough all over his head.

What was a bit of a head scratcher however was the hint of cinnamon added into the mix. Had to wonder where exactly that one was coming from. I mean, it’s not exactly a common pizza topping. Not that I was aware of anyway.

Oh, and his lips? Soft. Like, super, duper soft. Dang, did he use moisturizer on those puppies? ...was that even a thing? Did people actually moisturize their lips? I don’t know about that, seems odd, but maybe-

I finally snapped out of it. The painfully longest second of my entire life at last came to an end and time sped back up to normal. I jerked my head back, hands flying up to clasp over my mouth, my eyes round and horrified, my face burning and breaking heat records across the globe. His own eyes were wide as he blinked at me a couple times before settling back on his heels in a daze.

Oh god, oh god, oh god…

What had I done?

No, seriously. What had I just frigging done?!

He was the first one to break the roaring, deafening silence as he began, “H-” 

“LET ME SEE IF WE HAVE ANY MORE IN THE BACK!” I blurted out loudly over him before I even realized what my mouth was doing, causing him to stagger a small step backwards.

That hung in the air between us for a couple awkward seconds.

And then I bolted. 

One second I was staring at his dumbfounded, stupidly gorgeous face, the next I was in the back room, slamming the door shut behind me and pressing my back up against it, hyperventilating and staring at my two coworker’s dumbfounded, not-quite-so-stupidly gorgeous faces.

…did that just really happen? Was this even real life? No way… there was just no possible way! This had to be a dream. A terrible, cruel dream! One that I was ready to wake up from now in my old bed in my old room in my old life, because the real world? Too much for me! This had been a bad idea, I’d been kidding myself, I couldn’t handle it! I may not have been happy in my old life, but at least it was safe and predictable and everything stayed the same and nothing happened, nothing like… like… 

Groaning, I squeezed my eyes shut as the last few agonizing minutes did an instant replay in my mind. I rolled away from the door over to the wall beside it, hiding my face against the cool, concrete surface.

This was a nightmare. All I needed to do was wake up.

I banged my head against the concrete.

Thump.

Wake up…

Thump.

Wake up!

Thump.

For the love of all that is good and merciful, please, please wake up already!

I peeked one eye open. 

Much to my dismay, the sight that greeted me was still that of the bland grey storage room wall as opposed to my old, safe fluffy pillow back in my old, safe warm bed.

It wasn’t a dream.

Drat.

And now my forehead hurt. Great. Just… great.

Another groan escaped me as I flipped back around, still using the wall for support as I slid down to sit on the ground, hugging my knees to my chest. Frozone and Kristoff had put down the large box they had been carrying between them and were now kneeling down in front of me. Their faces were twisted in confusion and concern, their lips were moving, but I couldn’t hear what they were saying to me.

It just kept playing on loop over and over again in my head.

Had I really just said that? After doing… that?! To the poor, unsuspecting pizza guy?! 

He was going to think I’d escaped from an insane asylum! That’d I’d planned that. That’d I’d plotted and possibly even schemed. That that was my MO, to lure pure, innocent men into my carefully laid traps before I pounced and-

Dear lord, I was a sexual predator. 

They were going to make me watch the harassment orientation video again.

Would it be enough? Or was it too late for me? Was I too far gone and out of control? Men everywhere, see me and despair! Cower and flee, lest I corrupt thy virtue and-

“I kissed him,” the words came tumbling out of my mouth before I’d even realized it and with them, sound came rushing back to my ears.

“You what?!” Frozone yelped as he shot back up to his feet, at the same time Kristoff asked, “Kissed who? A customer? What happened?”

“I- He- It… Dough!” I all but shouted the word, striking up a finger, my eyes darting wildly between the two of them. “There was dough! Flipping, flying! And then, it wasn’t. And- his head! Oh gosh, his head, it was- I started laughing! I mean, wouldn’t you? Who wouldn’t have, it just was too- but then there was the wave! Oh my god, the wave! So I did the only thing I could, obviously… I hid! But then, that was just… it was so stupid! So I stood back up, but, but… he was there and I was there and we both were there and it… it just… It. Just. Happened!”

The deluge came to an abrupt and blessed end and a hush fell. A long one at that, punctuated only by my haggered panting. My coworkers just stared at me unblinking for a few seconds before exchanging looks between each other.

“Did you, uh… follow any of that?” Kristoff mumbled out of the corner of his mouth.

“Not really,” Frozone shook his head, stepping over to the door. He cracked it open an inch to squint through, before brightening a bit. “Oh, that’s not a customer! That’s just one of the pizza dudes from across the way.”

I furrowed my brow up at him, shaking my head, “Does that really make it any better?!”

His fingers scratched under his cap before he shrugged. “...guess not.”

I stiffened. “Wait… he’s still out there? Oh god…” I buried my face into my knees, arms covering my head as I tightened my ball formation. I couldn’t face him, I just couldn’t! Please just kill me now. Put me out of my misery, I beg of you. “Tell him something… anything. Please, just… make him go away!” Then I gasped, head jerking back up once more, “Tell him I don’t work here!”

Frozone stared at me blankly.  “...you want me to tell him we left the storefront unmanned, allowing some lunatic to climb behind the counter, steal and get dressed in one of our uniforms and pretend she worked here, all without us realizing it?”

“No, no, that’s not what I meant. Please, that’d just be silly,” I waved him off. Pft, what a ridiculous idea. “No, I meant tell him that no one like me works here. Tell him that… that I was just a figment of his imagination! Yeah, that it was all in his head! Or, oh! Tell him that I was a ghost!”

Totally plausible.

At least, to my somewhat addled, panicked brain, it was. 

...I may have been a bit logically compromised at the moment.

His eyelids drooped. “Yeah, no, I’m not doing that.”

My shoulders slumped at that. But then I perked up again as I seized on another idea. “Then tell him I’ve left the country!”

“...left?” Kristoff cocked an eyebrow at me. “Past tense? As in you’ve already crossed the border? ...in the space of five minutes?”

I nodded my head rapidly. “Yes! I’m already in France! Or Arabia! Ooo, Norway!”

Sighing, Frozone squatted down in front of me once more. “Listen, if this guy is harassing you or… if he attacked-”

“What?!” I burst out in horror before quickly shaking my head. “No! No, it was all me! My mouth was the offending party here! His lips were just innocent bystanders! But it was an accident, a mistake, I swear! I didn’t mean to-”

“Alright, alright, I believe you,” he raised a hand, gesturing for me to settle down. “I’m still not sure I totally understand what exactly went down, but… this all just sounds like one big misunderstanding. I’ll go talk to him and see if I can get him to leave,” he said gently as he rose.

Feeling relief flood my chest, I raised my hands over my bowed head, pressing my palms together. “Thank you, thank you, thank you!”

“Yeah, yeah, just… try not to let it happen again,” he mumbled over his shoulder before disappearing through the door.

Wonderful! Problem solved!

...for now, anyway.

I moaned, leaning my head back against the wall and hiding my face in my hands.

I still had to deal with the fact that he worked at the Pizza Planet directly opposite of me. That’d I’d probably have to see him every day, or close to. That’d he probably try to talk to me and want an explanation for the… thing I did. I didn’t even know if I could explain it. I had a hard enough time making small talk with people. And this? So not small! Not even close! Ugh, what was I even going to do the next time I saw him? I had no idea. Absolutely none. Was crumbling to dust and scattering on the wind a viable option? No, probably not.

A tiny whimper escaped me.

“Aww, why so glum?” a very dopey, but very familiar voice asked.

Eyebrows knitting together, I dragged my hands down my face, peeking out between my fingertips.

One of those little reindeer plushies was in my face, being held aloft by Kristoff. Using a finger to bob the stuffed animal’s head up and down, he continued on in that same goofy warble, “Turn that frown upside down! Cheer up! Things aren’t as bad as they seem.”

I just gave him a dull stare.

“When I’m feeling down, I like to sing a song and-”

“Kristoff,” I grumbled, folding my arms atop my knees.

He tipped the dolls head to one side. “Who’s Kristoff? I’m Sven and I’m here to brighten your day and-”

“Kristoff,” I interjected a second time, eyelids drooping now as I said flatly, “Please make the reindeer stop talking to me.”

“Got it,” he immediately dropped the idiotic voice as he tossed the plushie over his shoulder.

“Thank you.” I then sighed, cradling my face into my arms.

It’d been sweet of him to try to comfort me, but…

...I think I’d preferred it more when he was a bit of a grump.

“Wait,” Rayne froze, her reflection’s gaze meeting mine in the mirror. Eyes dancing and voice quivering slightly as she bit back a grin, she asked, “I’m sorry, but you did what now?"

I grimaced, looking down at my lap and shifting uncomfortably.  “Please don’t make me say it again.”

“Oh my god!” Now she erupted with laughter, making me twitch in my seat.

My face warmed for what must have now been the thousand and twenty-sixth time that day (oh yes, I’d been keeping count) and I released a tiny huff, glancing back up at her reflection. “I fail to see what’s so funny.”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” she waved one hand, trying to muffle her giggles behind the other and failing miserably. She at last managed to sober somewhat, saying, “I get it though, I really do. You want to earn them fat tips. But sweetie, you’re supposed to suck up to the customers, not suck face with them!” She spluttered and broke down once more.

I narrowed my eyes, heaving a sigh through my nose.

Ah, having the loving care and support of a dear friend.

Wonder what that’s like.

Must be nice. 

I had gotten home not too long ago from my disastrous first day. Thankfully, Frozone had taken pity on me, letting me hide in the back for the remainder of my shift and help him with getting the rest of that new shipment sorted out. But tomorrow I wouldn’t be so lucky. My insides were already twisting into a million knots at the very idea. Sleep? Ha! Like I’d be getting any of that tonight.

Rayne and I were now in my bedroom. By now all of the baby stuff had been cleared out and the room was looking pretty bare. Not like I had a lot of munny (aka none) to decorate with. But hopefully that’d be rectified soon and I could start making the space feel a little more homey… a little more me. For now, there was the bed they’d already had in there, now complete with a quilt comforter with various patterns and shades of blue - sort of a “house warming” gift from Rayne and Riku. As for the rest of the furniture, they’d introduced me to a thing called curb shopping, out of which we’d managed to find me a free wardrobe and dresser, both obviously old and a little nicked but otherwise serviceable, as well as a vanity with a large mirror attached and an accompanying chair.

It was at that vanity that I now currently sat, with Rayne standing behind me while she brushed my hair. Or, rather… had been brushing. At the moment, she was a bit otherwise preoccupied with her chuckling at my expense.

“Why exactly are we doing this again?” I muttered through my teeth.

“Hm?” she wiped at the corners of her eyes, finally settling down enough to resume carefully stroking the brush through my long, pale strands. “Oh! Well, since jellybean here,” she patted her tummy, “is a girl, I gotta prepare! And Riku’s majestic mane is not around at the moment, so who else am I gonna practice on? Besides, it’s soothing. It’ll help make you feel better.”

...which, okay, it kind of was.

She shrugged, “Plus, brushing hair is a time honored tradition of girl talk.”

My nose crinkled slightly. “This is girl talk?”

She gave me a pointed look. “We’re discussing kissing boys, what do you think?”

My shoulders slumped, “Ugh, don’t remind me.”

One corner of her lips twitched up and she pinched my cheek. “Lookit you, already making friends on your first day, I’m so proud!”

Lightly swatting her hand away, I scoffed. “I know I’m a bit clueless when it comes to this whole being around people thing but last time I checked, what I did was not the socially acceptable way to make a new friend.”

“You’re right. My mistake.” She smirked, “I should have said boyfriend.”

I paled. “Boyfriend? Oh no, certainly not. He definitely thinks I have a few screws loose now... That I’m a total freakshow. He’s probably just as mortified as I am. Beyond maybe demanding I explain myself and that I apologize, he’s not going to want to have anything to do with me.”

“You kidding?” she quirked an eyebrow. “You’ve seen yourself, right? Girl, you’re a total knockout. That boy is probably praising Aphrodite for blessing him with the divine gift that was your sweet, sweet lips.”

I groaned, my hands wringing the hem of my skirt. Now commencing blush number one thousand and twenty-seven. “This is all just so humiliating. I wish I could just disappear! Just… find a deep dark pit somewhere to dive into and get lost miles below the earth’s surface and… and discover an underground kingdom of mole people! And they’d welcome me with open arms and accept me as one of their own to live out the rest of my days in peace… that is of course, until I inevitably kiss one of them on accident because, let’s face it, I have a taste for it now, the beast has been awoken, this dark urge cannot be controlled, so then they’ll banish me down an even deeper, darker pit where I’ll find the mole people’s mole people and-”

“Elsa,” she bonked me on the head with the flat of the bristled implement.

“Right. Babbling. Sorry,” I winced, hanging my head. “Maybe...maybe I should just quit.” The hairbrush stilled again, this time as Rayne fixed me with a dull stare. I sighed, “No, I know, it’d be pathetic to give up after only working one day, and over something so silly. Besides, I… need to stop running away from my problems and start facing them head on.”

She smiled and the combing began again. “Good girl. Sorry,” she murmured the last part as she caught a snag, eliciting a soft hiss from me. “Now stop changing the subject. I want all the juicy deets on Romeo. Spill.”

Ugh, I really just wanted to forget the whole thing ever happened. But there was no getting out of this, it seemed. Might as well get it over with. “Well… he works right across from me and-”

“Wait, you mean at the Pizza Planet?” At my nod, she pressed, “Was he blonde?” 

I frowned. “No, redhead.”

Her eyes widened. “Aw snap, you kissed Lea?!”

...Lea?

Both eyebrows shooting up my forehead, I blinked. “I don’t know, maybe?”

Annnnnnnd there she went, exploding into another fit of laughter.

I wished Anna were here. She never would have-

...oh, who am I kidding? She would have been cracking up twice as hard.

Reaching for a lock of my hair to twist at, I asked, “Do you... know him?”

“That mall used to be practically a second home to me, I know almost everyone that works there. Oh gosh, trust me, you have nothing to worry about. Lea’s a giant sweetheart, he’ll understand that you’re just a total spazz and it’s all a big mistake. Just talk to him.”

My eyes darted to the left. “I think I’d rather take my chances with the mole people.”

“Oh shush. Just do it, you’ll be fine, I promise.” She fell silent for a couple more sweeps of the hairbrush. “Soooooo…” she drew the word out before conspiratorially whispering, “what was it like?” 

My forehead wrinkled. “...what was what like?”

“You know…” she waggled her eyebrows at me, “Laying some sweet sugar on that big red tree of a man.”

Make that one thousand and twenty-eight. I clasped my hands over my ears, “Gah, please tell me you did not just say that!”

She snorted, “What? Don’t get me wrong, I could kiss those pillow lips of Riku’s all day-”

“I really didn’t need to hear that.”

Rayne rolled her eyes. “But there’s nothing wrong with having a little curiosity! So stop holding out on me already, girl. I want to know everything.”

Averting my gaze, I grumbled, “I was kind of too busy having a frigging heart attack to really pick up on any details.”

Alright, so, not technically true. Like, at all. It had actually been kind of distressing how painfully aware I was of everything teeny-tiny little thing in that one now infamous second that had stretched on to infinity and beyond.

But… I really, really didn’t want to talk about it.

I noticed Rayne eyeing me suspiciously, not quite buying it. Before she could press further however, I cleared my throat and said, “Could we… please just talk about something else now?”

“Fine,” she harrumphed.  Her lips pursed to one side, then, “...have you called them yet?” 

Twitching, I muttered, “Something other than that.”

“No, no,” her reflection pinned me with a stern look. “You don’t get to do that. I already let you wriggle your way out of the last topic, which by the way we’re gonna be circling back around to.” Great. “But really, you need to talk to them and just get it over with already. Rip the bandaid off. They’re probably worried sick.”

I exhaled slowly through my nose. “I know, I just… was giving them more time to cool off.”

“It’s been a week, how much longer do you think they really need?”

I shrugged, “Oh, I dunno, I was thinking maybe… sometime next century?” Another bonk to my head from the hairbrush. “Ow! Could you not?”

She crossed her arms and frowned down at me. “Call them.”

Yeesh, the child wasn’t even born yet and Rayne already had her Disapproving Mom Stare down pat. I could tell you now, that kid wasn’t going to be getting away with anything.

“I don’t even have a phone.”

She fished her mobile out her pocket and slapped it down on the vanity.  “Call them.”

Gnawing on my lower lip, I slowly reached for the phone, resting my hand over it. A couple heartbeats of hesitation, then I was pushing it away.  “Tomorrow, okay? I… I’ll call them tomorrow.”

Her eyes narrowed, but at last she relented. “Alright then. I’m gonna hold you to that though, missy.  Now,” she set the brush down beside her phone and gathered my hair into two separate clumps, one just behind either ear, “I’m envisioning pigtails. How cute would that be?” She beamed at me in the mirror. “What do you think?”

“Uh… sure?”

As she happily set to work, my thoughts wandered back to making that dreaded phonecall.

Tomorrow…

That’s what I’d told myself yesterday. And the day before that. And the day before that. So I certainly hoped she wasn’t going to hold me to it.

But who knows… maybe I actually meant it this time… 

...eh… probably not.

Author’s note: Elsa being the walking, talking, awkward ball of anxiety rears its ugly head once more! To her credit, at least she remembered to say what Kristoff told her to say… now the question is, did that really help matters? You decide! Side note, I found an excuse to make Kristoff talk for reindeers in this fic, and really, that’s the dream right there. And thanks to Rayne, at least Elsa now knows the name of the stranger she accidentally got to first base with, so that has to be a step in the right direction, right? Also, gosh, I know it sucks that we’re already 4 chapters in and Lea hasn’t even gotten to talk yet. Don’t worry, he starts talking next chapter! It’s all small and slow at first, but once he has a chance to really get going, he doesn’t shut up, I promise xD

Next chapter, will Elsa woman up and sort things out with Lea? Will she make this phonecall to the mysterious “them” (you all can probably guess who) that Rayne alluded to? Stay tuned to find out! Thank you so much for reading, and an extra BIG thank you to anyone who liked or reblogged last chapter, seeing that always brings the biggest, goofiest smile to my face!

FIRST CHAPTER || PREVIOUS CHAPTER || NEXT CHAPTER

#kingdom hearts #frozen #elsa #axel #fanfiction #lea #fanfic #kingdom hearts fanfiction #frozen fanfiction #kh fanfiction #kh fanfic #frozen fanfic #kingdom hearts fanfic #axelsa #fluff #romcom #snark #kh3 #my writing #ice cream and fire oven pizza #rare pair #crossover pairing #slow burn

[isitgintimeyet]

The Ties That Bind

AO3

Previous

Well, thanks for reading and thanks for all the comments and feedback after the last chapter! Jamie and Claire need some time out and a couple of friendly shoulders to lean on.

Thanks to @mo-nighean-rouge for the beta.

Chapter 17: A Therapeutic Counselling

Sometimes, just saying that you hate something, and having someone agree with you, can make you feel better about a terrible situation. - Lemony Snicket, The Bad Beginning

Jamie: How are you doing today?

Sassenach: OK. Lot of thinking

Sassenach: How are you?

Jamie: Worried. When can I see you?

Sassenach: Not yet. Will let you know

Jamie: I love you x

Sassenach: ...

Sassenach: …

Sassenach: I know

Sassenach: ...

Sassenach: Love you too

******

The day at work dragged by. Jamie felt detached and sluggish, fuelled only by industrial-strength espresso. He really thought they had worked it through last night. After the initial anger followed by hurt and sadness, Jamie had believed there was an acceptance of the situation. He had let Claire take the lead in their lovemaking, realising her fierce need to possess his body and brand him, mark him as hers. But Claire's wound was still raw, with no time to scab over, and his unintentional teasing with the condom had been enough to open it wide again. He considered himself to have a degree of emotional intelligence, but it had totally failed him last night. And the result was being told to leave Claire’s bed and return home, in a taxi, his arousal having quickly dissipated when he realised his own insensitivity.

The day had been incredibly unproductive too, constantly checking his phone for signs that Claire was willing to meet him. Apart from the terse responses to his texts, there had been no further communication.

The screen of his phone lit up, announcing the arrival of a message. Greedily, he picked it up, disappointed when John’s name appeared.

John: Gym in 20?

Jamie: yh. See you in there

******

John was already pounding away on the treadmill when Jamie arrived. He quickly adjusted the settings, plugged his headphones in and set off. His legs and hand still ached from the strenuous activity yesterday, so he kept it easy, not even trying to match or outdo John’s pace as he usually did.

John glanced over to his friend, his face questioning Jamie’s unaccustomed slow speed. Jamie shrugged and carried on.

The process was repeated on the rowing machines and cross trainers. By the time they reached the hand bikes, Jamie had had enough. He pulled out his headphones and tapped John’s arm.

“That’s it fer me. I’m headin’ fer the shower.”

“Are you ok? You don’t seem your usual, er, bullish self.”

“Aye, well, things on ma mind.”

Wrapping a towel round himself, Jamie left his shower cubicle and headed to his locker as John walked into the changing room. John stared momentarily at Jamie’s stomach, before hastily shifting his gaze upwards.

“Er, good night then, was it?” He nodded his head in the general direction of Jamie’s lower body.

Jamie glanced in the mirror. The evidence of Claire’s ministrations the previous night was clearly visible, livid red circles across his abdomen with faint pink tracks down his chest.

“No’ sae good as ye’re thinking. Have ye time fer a drink? I could do wi’ one.”

******

John brought the drinks over to their usual table. Unusually, John had chosen neat whisky. It seemed more appropriate to him, joining Jamie in a dram or two while listening to, he was sure, Jamie’s current relationship problems.

Jamie took a sip of his drink, then another. John waited in silence.

“I dinna ken where tae start.” Jamie began, tapping his glass with his fingers.

John shrugged.

“We’ve known each other, what, ten, eleven years? And in all that time, have ye ever known me to fall for a woman? I mean, really fall, hard?”

John shook his head. “No, plenty of girlfriends, plenty of relationships, but none that I thought ‘this is it, this is Jamie settling down.’ Not until now.”

“Aye, ye’re no wrong. No’ wishin’ tae sound too soppy, but this is the first time I’ve felt like this. Claire is the one I see a future with… did see… no, do see. But I’m feared she willna want tae carry on. And it’s all ma fault. I canna believe it, everything was going sae well.”

He took a larger gulp of his drink before carrying on. “I went tae see Geneva, like we spoke about.”

“Oh, did Claire not know? Has she found out?”

“Nah, I told her what I was doin’. That was fine. It’s no’ that… Geneva’s pregnant. With ma bairn. I told Claire last night.”

John was stunned into silence at this revelation, before bursting forth with a barrage of questions. “Oh my god, Jamie, pregnant? Really? Yours? Are you sure? And telling Claire? How did she take it? Sorry, stupid question… of course she’ll have taken it badly. But does she think you’d slept with Geneva while seeing her?”

“Aye, I’m sure it’s mine. I’ve kent Geneva for a good while and the way she thinks. And Claire, weel, she kens it was just afore I met her. She took it as well as anyone would… blamed me fer being led by ma cock, no’ ma brain. Blamed me fer leading Geneva on when I’d no mind tae have a relationship wi’ her. Then took me tae her bed. Like a vixen she was, till… weel, till I wasna as sensitive as I shoulda been. And she told me tae go. Jes’ a couple of texts since then. And I’m worried, John. What if I’ve screwed it all up? What if she doesna want tae be wi’ me? I dinna ken what I’d do. What will I do, John? ”

“I don’t know, Jamie, I really don’t know.”

John had never seen his friend this upset about a woman. To Jamie, girlfriends had always been like buses, if you missed one, just hang around and another will be along soon enough. He realised that Claire must be really quite special.

“All you can do is talk to her and listen to her too. I’m sure she won’t want to throw away what you have. But you must realise it’s a lot for Claire to deal with, a child and an ex! She knows you weren’t unfaithful to her. And you’ll need to reassure her that you won’t be going back to the woman. That’s not what Geneva wanted, was it?”

“Aye, she did suggest we could try again. But I made it clear that wasna going tae happen. And even if Claire and I canna…” Jamie paused for a moment before taking a deep breath and continuing. “Even if Claire and I willna be together, I will never be wi’ Geneva. John, dinna tell anyone about this, please. I want tae have it all sorted afore I have tae start explaining tae people... Another one, eh?”

Jamie drained his glass and stood up. John wasn’t sure he could stomach another neat whisky but felt that asking for some ginger ale to go with it might send Jamie over the edge. He just nodded and passed his empty glass over.

Jamie returned with two whiskies and two packets of salt and vinegar crisps. He ripped one open and shovelled a couple of handfuls into his mouth. Conversation between them stopped until Jamie finished crunching. He wiped his hands on his tracksuit and leaned forward, resting his elbows on the table.

“And do ye ken, while all this is goin’ on in ma head… what about Claire… what about Geneva… how do I explain tae Claire… what do I tell Jenny and Da… the one thing that’s no’ gettin’ a look in is the poor wee bairn that’s goin’ tae be arrivin’. I mean, I dinna want tae have a baby this way.”

“I know... but It’s awfully convenient for Geneva isn’t it? She wants to be in a relationship with you. Suddenly she’s pregnant. Call me a cynical lawyer, and I know accidents can happen but... think about a DNA test when the baby’s born. Just remember, I’m here for you as a friend but I’m also here in my professional capacity. I hope you don’t need that but bear that in mind.”

Jamie’s phone, resting on the table, bleeped. He snatched it up.

Sassenach: xan we taiolk???

Sassenach: im aa bit pissssed, och aye xx

**************

Fortunately for Claire, and more fortunately for her patients, she had no theatre or outpatient sessions, so she could spend the day in her office, fortified by strong black coffee, dictating patient letters and catching up on other paperwork.

She found it difficult to focus though. Her mind kept replaying the conversation between herself and Jamie last night, culminating in forcing Jamie to leave her flat, in a taxi, with a bad case of blue balls, no doubt.

It had been unkind, and possibly not rational of her to do that, but just when she had reached a level of acceptance of the situation, he had tried to include contraception as part of foreplay. That had hit hard, not only Geneva’s pregnancy, but his goddamn lack of sensitivity.

Claire’s secretary tried to keep her spirits up by frequently bringing her pots of tea and rounds of toast. (“This is what keeps the NHS goin’, ye ken, pet. Nice bit of hot tea and a bite of toast. Soon put the colour back in yer cheeks.”)

Her phone rested on the desk, distracting her from her work. She kept picking it up, poised to send Jamie a text, but unsure what to say, she would put it down again. The messages she had sent to Jamie were short responses to his, giving away nothing.

By mid afternoon she had had enough. The caffeine from the copious amounts of coffee and tea had given her a headache so she decided to walk home, trying to clear her head. As she gathered her papers together, shoving them into her bag, the screen of her phone lit up, announcing the arrival of a message. She picked it up, disappointed when Geillis’s name appeared.

G: r u ok. Didn’t c u 2day

Claire: it’s complicated. Come round later for a drink?

G: ok. C u l8r

******

The door was unlocked, so Geillis let herself in and headed straight for the living room. She sat down as Claire appeared, struggling to carry two whisky tumblers, an ice bucket and a bottle of Broch Tuarach.

“Celebratin’ are we? Ye’ve brought out the good stuff, I see.” Geillis commented

Claire poured two very large whiskies and passed one to her friend. She dropped three ice cubes into her whisky, letting the contents splash over the rim of the glass and onto the table.

“Oh bugger... I’ll have bloody ice in my whisky if I want. I might actually want it to dilute the flavour, he doesn’t bloody know what I want, that’s for sure.”

Claire tried to mop up the spillage with the hem of her shirt, succeeding only in spreading the moisture over a larger area. Geillis began to suspect that this was not her first drink of the evening.

“So, I take it we’re no’ celebratin’ here then. What’s the problem, Claire? My hunch is it’s man-related, am I right? Come on, tell me, while I savour this fine dram.”

“I don’t know where to start. We’ve been friends for, what, seven years now? You saw me with Frank and know what shit he put me through. I’m so relaxed with Jamie. I don’t want to be soppy but I love the way he makes me feel. I see a future with him, or, well I did and it’s suddenly got so complicated.”

Claire swigged her drink.

“Basically, last year Jamie was in a relationship with a woman called Geneva. Stupid bloody name. Anyway, he finished with her, but they briefly got back together just before I met him. He ended it again. Then a few days ago she started sending him messages asking to meet up.”

“Oh, did he go and no’ tell ye? Is that it? And ye’re right, ‘tis a daft name.”

Claire took another large swig. The ice was starting to hurt her teeth. She fished a couple of cubes out of her drink and dropped them back in the bucket.

“No, He told me he was going to see her to make it plain there was no chance. That was fine. It’s not that… Geneva’s pregnant. It’s his baby. She’s keeping it. He told me last night.”

”Ye dinna think he shagged her while he was wi’ ye? Christ, a bairn. Why would anyone want a bairn?”

“I know it…” Claire drained her whisky. “Him and her… them… was before me. But I hate the thought of him screwing that cow. I’ve never met her but I’m sure she’s a cow. Anyway, I got mad and accused him of thinking with his cock.”

Geillis raised her glass in salute and nodded. “He’s a man, that’s what they all do. Can work to our advantage, though.”

“And I accused him of leading Geneva on. Then I got all maudlin about our babies.”

Geillis eyed Claire’s midriff. “No’ ye too? ‘Cos the amount of alcohol ye’re shifting would no’ be good.”

“G, of course not. I meant hypothetical babies.”

“They’re the best kind,” Geillis muttered. “Dinna get under yer feet, or smell, or cry or…”

“Focus, G. So after rage and tears, I then turned into some sort of vixen and practically pounced on him. Until he suggested that I put the condom on him, all sexy-like. So I asked him to leave. That’s it. What should I do, G? I want him, but it’s all getting so messy.”

“I dinna ken, Claire. Mebbe another drink?” Geillis handed Claire her glass in expectation as she carried on talking.

“Ye have tae figure out what ye want. That’s ye, no’ Jamie or that woman or a bairn. Think about jes’ yerself. What are ye willin’ tae deal with? And then all you can do is talk tae him. If ye want him, ye have tae remember he wasna unfaithful. He needs tae gi’ ye reassurance that he willna go back tae the bitch. But if ye dinna feel ye want these complications, think carefully about what ye’re givin’ up. Either way, it’s gonna be difficult... Now pour that Broch Tuarach. I could develop quite a taste fer this.”

Claire poured two more very large whiskies and drank deeply.

“And I need to remember,” she started, slurring her words. “I can be angry, really really mad as hell with Jamie and totally pissed off with Genevieve, sorry, Geneva who I bet is a total dog breath and always coordinates her handbag with her shoes. And I bet she gets one of those really neat bumps, not fat or all round… sorry, what was I saying? Oh, I remember. But there’s going to be a li’l baby with red hair and curls and I’d have to meet it. And it might not like me and cry for Gennifer, sorry, Genevieve, I mean Geneva.”

And with that, Claire closed her eyes and rested her head on Geillis’ shoulder. Geillis patted her curls affectionately and carefully removed the glass, now at a precarious angle, from Claire’s hand.

“What I’m thinkin’ is, ‘twas verra handy how she got pregnant by accident, is it no’? Verra suspicious. Well, Claire, ye need tae talk tae Jamie as soon as possible and get this sorted. And remember, I may no’ be tall, but I’m verra strong and I’ve a friend who works with horses and can always lend me a castration tool. In case ye need it.”

******

Claire woke up as Geillis shut the front door and headed home. Still drunk, Claire fumbled in her bag for her mobile and started typing.

Claire: xan we taiolk???

Claire: im aa bit pissssed, och aye xx

Jamie: Of course. When? Now?

Claire : tomrw. need sleeep noo. want crosssant. sooooooo hungry. byeee

Claire:stupid fukin sperms

#outlander fanfic #outlander fan fiction #the ties that bind #Jamie Fraser #claire beauchamp #chapter 17

[mdhwrites]

Mira the Monster Slayer!

“I call upon the power of the northern wind, Osphren, and the Boreal Forest to curse the infernal beast of the realm! May it find its sun taken, its fire extinguished, and its head underfoot Mira, the great monster slayer!”

What. The. Fuck? Karafen opened one of her eyes as she heard the shouting at the mouth of her cave and groaned as she worked to untangle herself from her blankets. She wasn’t planning to get up for another day or two, if that, and she really didn’t need to be woken up early, not after the stupid ballista the town nearby installed for her last time. At least that was just ash now, much like this… What the hell was it? Osphoreal? No, those were the human’s pathetic god things, weren’t they? Oh, please don’t let it be a paladin. Those never shut up.

The sound of scraping armor, clinking equipment, and the unsheathing of a sword brought Karafen’s attention up to the thing that had actually come to fight her. It was a girl, rather short in stature but with strong, exposed arms and legs. Exposed because her only real armor was a breastplate that looked awkward on her. Otherwise, she had a leather skirt that made Karafen’s eye twitch, and leather shoes. She also looked like she was eighteen at most so probably didn’t have the courage to wrestle her to explain the lack of armor. Not that the dragon would have been opposed to such a fate, seeing as the blonde girl was rather attractive and those nice, strong thighs looked rather comfortable.

Mira for her part stepped back, her tanned, white skin turning red as she looked away, her long hair blocking her face as she raised her free hand, which didn’t even have a glove on it, over her face. “Um, uh, Miss Dragon, can you please assume your, you know, dragon mode?”

Dragon mo- Oh no. She wasn’t even local. She didn’t even- “Hahahaha! Look kid, this is my ‘dragon mode’. These puppies are just a part of it.” She smacked her large, exposed chest, her breasts shaking in response. The smooth, soft, red, reptilian scales that covered her body made sure the large, dangerous claws didn’t hurt her, and her green eyes glowed with satisfaction at how mortified the girl looked. At least that was one nice part of the ignorant ones. Never expected the dragon to look better than any human ever could.

Mira almost took her face off as she went to bring her hands together, forgetting for a moment that she’d already drawn her sword as she had to jump back from it. It also seemed to remind the young adventurer that she was technically here on a mission as she pointed it at Karafen. “L-Look beast, j-just because you have taken the glamour of a goddess does not mean that I will fail in my quest. The local village has asked for your removal and that is exactly what I shall do!”

Karafen raised an eyebrow as she felt her nipples before she pushed herself up and lifted herself out of her blankets. Mira’s eyes widened to the size of dinner plates as she almost dropped her sword in response. After all, like most fools Karafen had to face, she had thought the large chest on the dragon would slow it down. Be too much for it.

Not so much when it stood ten feet tall, had wings that could eclipse the sun, a tail that could be mistaken for a leviathan, and abs that you could grind meat against. Karafen grinned at the shear terror in the young maiden’s eyes as she licked her lips. After all, human wasn’t the worst meal, especially if seasoned first with a few doses of fear and arousal. Well, maybe more than a couple doses of the latter with how red the little idiot’s cheeks were. No, she would take her time with this one.

Mira went to open her mouth but Karafen was faster as the dragon’s tail spun around and the tip lashed out against the girl’s sword. The warrior screamed as it shattered in her grip, damn near breaking her hand in the process, and the hilt clattered off to the side.

Karagen merely yawned before lazily letting out, “So, where’s your next weapon? Or are you already a defenseless mouse?”

Mira swallowed hard, stepping back as she looked around herself. Then she became strangely confident for a creature so close to death as she looked up and shouted, “Accelizer!”

For a moment Karafen didn’t get it. After all, what little she knew about human magic told her that was an amplifier of sorts. It was only useful if a spell was in effect. Then again, she had first come into the cave shouting abou-

Crack!

Both girls stopped dead as they heard the break in rock, before a large pillar of ice crashed through the top of the cave and shattered against the floor. Shards of ice scattered everywhere with the only thing stopping Mira from being impaled was Karafen’s tail moving fast enough to defend her. The dragon could feel her eyelids growing heavy as she could see her breath though and she fell to her full set of claws to help support her. Crouched like this, she looked at Mira with a glare that would kill most small animals, and almost stopped the poor girl’s heart for… multiple reasons, before she hissed out, “What did you do?”

Mira swallowed hard before making the gesture she had tried earlier, which was to tap her two pointer fingers together. “Well, um, I had a pet lizard at magic school and it didn’t like the cold. I decided I would see if dragons were similar and, uh, might have cursed the entire mountain with a frost spell.” The last part was whispered as quickly as she could manage, but it wasn’t entirely necessary. Not as stone continued to turn into ice under their own feet.

Karafen glanced around her before she let out another long yawn. Mira even felt like celebrating this action just before a pillar of ice appeared next to her. The dragon paused at that as she watched the cute mage flail as she tried to get up. To do this would take a lot of power, even if on accident. Or, actually, especially on accident. That sort of power could be-

The crashing of another part of the ceiling Karafen exactly what that power was doing though. She crouched even lower, gathered what little strength she had as the cold sapped her of her strength, and then pounced, slamming straight into Mira just as more of the cave fell apart. The two shot like a rocket forward, hitting a wall at the entrance of the cave and bouncing straight off onto the cliff that stood right outside the dragon’s lair.

Mira gasped for air, her ribs and torso feeling like one giant, bruised peach as she looked at the sky. She had never been hit by something… Period. To think her first punch as an adventurer was to be that of a dragon performing a lunge meant to normally kill prey was incredible! She had survived after all, just as would be expected of any monster slayer. Now if only she could stand.

Karafen for her part just shook her head, happy to be out in the sun where it was a little warmer now. She looked back to her home with a sigh. The ice wouldn’t likely harm her hoard of treasures and blankets, so there was at least that. The larger problem would be the damage done by blunt force from the rock and ice that was trying to find purchase in the same place. She didn’t expect anything to really break it all though. After all, it was a mountain and they hadn’t put any stress on the foundation or anything.

She then looked at where the two had crashed against the wall. The place where there had been a very thin bit of rock remaining because it was where the magic had begun, and now cracks in the ice beneath were growing at a… problematic rate. Maybe if she could get Mira to undo it nothing would-

And then the cavern collapsed as more and more of the mountain sunk in on itself, large pillars of ice spearing their way towards the skies as both of the girls stared at it in disbelief.

Karafen opened her mouth, looked at Mira, back at her home, and let out a large cloud of steam from her nostrils. Her maw snapped in annoyance as she shut it and bent her legs. Finally, she looked back at Mira, growling out, “So, your job was to get me to leave, right?” while her wings spread themselves out.

“Well, yeah, but I don’t know how much they’ll want to see me, so if you could-”

“That sounds like a you problem.” Before with a single wingbeat Karafen was gone, leaving the young mage clinging to the side of the cliff in a desperate attempt not to fall to her doom. Fortunately for her, it did not disperse the heavy cloud of dust that had formed at the precipice of the mountain, and she was too embarrassed to correct the villagers below about how she had totally collapsed the mountain on top of the dragon.

Totally.

Something fun and silly to write to help me out of the funk of... lots of recent things. As always with any character I make, you can ask me things to try to inspire more stupid silliness with them because I like random projects!

#Mira #Sexy #Dumb #MAGIC!