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#again im just very dumb so i wont have anything else to add on that hasnt been already said
todayisafridaynight · 9 months
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Throwing in fun (not fun) facts to contribute esp bc I was tagged in the essay: (Sorry in advance this is literally my career and special interest AND I just got back from a training conference about this SO obv I am going to talk too much. Disclosure: These statistics are from peer-reviewed sources AND the National Children's Alliance. The NCA IS an American association, though, so take this all with a grain of salt bc we're applying it to someone whose bg is not American lmao. This is an essay for funsies. CW: discussion of and stats about CSA, Child Abuse) Relevant to the Jo stuff is also that victims of one/any kind of abuse are statistically much more likely to subsequently face overlapping abuse, so knowing he comes from a home where abuse and potential neglect was actively occurring sets Jo-boy up for some sad statistics. I am looking for my notes on the stats for that but it's something stupid high, I wanna say over 30 or 40%.
Additionally, 47%~ of CSA victims are revictimized. Abysmal statistic but mostly just an interesting note if this IS the case/if we choose to interpret Jo this way bc of the other things mentioned in Masu's ask, specifically if we're viewing his unhealthy and ultimately traumatic relationship with Ikumi as a potential example of that revictimization (similarly, coming from a like background, it may have been revictimizing for Ikumi if she had ever experienced something like CSA, as well. It's one of those cases where they both got hurt even if neither of them were at fault for "playing house" as Jo calls it).
Seconding/Adding on to Masu's thoughts about Jo's behavior being as self-destructive as it is because of the compounded trauma of his life, victims of adolescent abuse "engage in health-risk behaviors such as substance use, physical fighting, and risky sexual activity," in far higher numbers than non-victims. We know for facts that adolescent Jo checks at least 2 of those 3 boxes, and that he still puts himself in unnecessary danger as a full grown adult (the Heian Tower fight, and Hoshino's Office fight): An interesting and well-written cycle of trauma and abuse on RGGs part, tbh, but also so narratively telling about how he saw/sees/continues to see himself as more an object than a person. (Love your notes on that btw, it rings very true. I could write an essay on that alone tbh.)
Another weird little thing I notice from both a Doyalist AND Watsonian perspective: Jo's disclosure of his father's abuse would classify as what we call an "accidental disclosure" in the field even though it's clearly intentional that he shares it with Ichi - it's offhanded and markedly unimportant in the story he's telling. He says it passively in a literary sense, as well: "The only thing waiting for me at home was my father's fists." Like homie, that's the most roundabout way you could have said "My dad beat me." Interestingly, up to 50% of [specifically CSA] victims do not state outright that abuse occurs, but disclose it accidentally/offhandedly; and in general, accidental disclosure is more common among people who have also delayed disclosure. Up to 66% of admissions from victims of child abuse come delayed if they come at all.
I think it's a very in-character remark of him to make, but statistically, it lines up with other victims of abuse as a whole. I think it's also just cool that from the Doyalist perspective, writing his lines in this way was intentional. It's part of the whole "Everything Jo says sounds like it could mean more than one thing" thing. He speaks poetically - it's intentional not just for the character but for the writer.
Okay, I'm done for now I'm sorry I just wanted to throw some added stuff into the convo bc I love applying my everyday usage of adolescent-focused trauma care and pysch shit to blorbos and seeing what sticks. Anyway, I also have a shit ton of thoughts on Masumi Arakawa as an abuse survivor but THATS another essay I won't dig into now. If I am still in your good graces after this long ass spiel I will consider it not only amazing but perhaps even cool as hell.
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[ continuity of this ask ]
#long post#cw csa#its related im keeping it LMAO#snap chats#love the implication that you'd be 'out of my good graces' for sending this LMAO NO YOURE FINE WHY WOULD I BE MAD#i wouldve chewed out masu at this point if that were the case i enjoy readin these#the thing is we just have to accept im very stupid and wont have a lot of commentary. just quiet note taking#and i very much do appreciate posts like these cause its a nice reminder for things im aware of but have become very passive to#like jo's passive exposure of his traumas is something im aware of and because of that i dont focus on it as much as i should#so thank you- to you and masu for writing as extensively as you do#again im just very dumb so i wont have anything else to add on that hasnt been already said#or it wont be anything i can just sit and write in a couple of minutes its something thatd prob take a while to write as in-depth as i want#which is why i feel bad for responding. Not At All with these types of asks LMAO CAUSE EVIDENTLY a lot of effort is done by you guys#and i appreciate it a lot so thank you again for writing in#arakawa as an abuse survivor is something i think of a lot and remembering his abuse as a child shines light on his actions and mentality#so i mean if you wanna share your thoughts on that go ahead ! just know. i prob will Also not have a lot to add on to it LMAO#LIKE THE BEST WAY I CAN INTERPRET MY LINGUISTIC INEPTITUDE IS JUST ME LISTENING my sister tells me i listen really well#and i do enjoy listening. because again im not smart enough to think of things on my own or i dont think its worth sharing some things#so always happy to read whatever you want to share
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icecreamkink · 3 years
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watched all of the untamed / cql in two weeks after my friend 1 told me abt mdzs a hundred years ago and my friends 2 and 3 tried to get me into cql for like two whole years and there are.
feelings.
very first scene is a very dramatic death in the middle of nightmare battle on sith planet land . i will forget abt it in the next tenish episodes and then will be very surprised when it becomes Extremely Painful
anyway magic flying gays and possession and human sacrifice! we are off to a great start
in retrospect, chaos goblin wei wuxian must have had a blast pretending to be so cRaZy and be as disruptive as he could as mo xuanyu lbr
listen. why is fire always evil coded. cant a magic clan wear red, black and orange and have flame motif while being wholesome?
For Legal Reasons These Are Not Zombies
i wish the politics of the sect were a bit clearer, especially at the beggining when the wen clan had sm power, was wen ruohan the chief cultivator? is that why they were so slow in responding to the attacks? im v confused by the pre yiling patriarch politics
fighting in the roof by the moonlight as way of flirtiiiiiiing. as i understand this is a wuxia/xianxia trope and honestly...... thank u for ur service
slight bullying and being a nuisance in general, as a way of flirting we love to see it
wwx: if i drink on the rooftop, thats not inside the cloud recesses! hmmm check and mate :D lwj: i will fuck u up so help me god   wwx: :0
i lov them
through hell or high water (quite literally) wei wuxian rem ains a trashfire gremlin till the end and i love him with my whole heart
in the pt subs wei wuxian calls jiang cheng a stubborn duck and i dearly wish that had come back
my opinions on almost every character goes from love to hate u - Hmm Me Like U - BABY. ILY. and i am Very Pleased w that. its been a while since i loved such a complete cast so much i think
no really. i WONT go into a detailed rant abt what i love about each of these characters and each of their relationships to each other. but i COULD. 
some lan disciples in the loudest whisper ever: YEAH THATS THE JIN BASTARD MENG YAO HEARD THE GOT SUPER HUMILIATED BY HIS DAD LOL SURE HOPE HE DOESNT TAKE SLIGHTS TO HIS CHARACTER TO HEART
lan xichen, immediately: i must Love him 
being into problematic ppl is in the Lan genetics, we come to realize
wen qing deserves so many awards for so many things but not snapping and just stabbing wen chao is at the top 
that scene at lan qirens class where wwx talks about using resentful energy to fight a violent spirit. exquisite.
 It establishes Good Student lan wangji, wei wuxian as curious and questioning and not afraid of taboo,  lwj sees that wwx is not, in fact, a dumb ass hes just a Dumbass,  shows us the audience (esp. a western audience) how shocking the idea of disrupting the dead/dying and controlling resentful energy actually is,  the theoretical foreshadow arguing, everyone else like ‘shUT UP’,  “and how could you ensure that the resentful energy would obey you and not hurt other?” “well i havent thought that far” and of course, lan qiren just straight up lobbing a hard object at wwx head,. chefs kiss
fellas is it gay to bother the hot rule obessessed nerd from ur school and make drawings of him with flowers in his hair and then hide gay porn in his book to antagonize him and ask him to hold ur hand and be ur friend and talk to him all the time and get him drunk and give him bunnies bc you know he likes them and give him a lantern and always want his attention and dedicate yourself to getting him to smile-
and after all of that wwx rly said oh i Admire him, aksd like yeah we all were there in high school buddy
i have Learned. caves = gay.
 accidental marriage +beint physically tied together with the sacred married ribbon+ gay panic+foreshadowing+bunnies! in the cave (1)
the story abt lan yi and baoshan sanren tho. i would like to see it
early days wen bros pull my heart strings like a guqin 
EVERYTHING about the lantern scene; disaster hets jiang yanli and jin zixuan; how wwx made lwj a bunny lantern. how soft and touched lwj was. wwx gleefully pointing out he was smiling and lwj IMMEDIATELY PULLING HIW SWORD ON HIM LMAO. tragically foreshadowy promises to do right by pepople, living without regrets. lwjs 'oh no do i love him??' face. just. all of it. 
i have it on good acc that in the novel lwj is explicitly Repressed Gay Panicked Big Horny which is delightful and rly Adds to the performance
 baby lwj is really just conceal dont feel dont let them know u have EMOTIONS (derogatory)
jiang cheng rly went "why dont.u go play with HIM if u like him so much"
jc and wwx have big BIG annoying sibling energy dont think too hard abt it or youll cry
lotus pier is soo pretty :((((((((((((((((
up until episode 13 you could think this could be a magical ancient chinese gays pride n prejudice w swords and shenanigans ................youre just not prepared for the game of thrones of it all
seriously ha ha ha i cried so much w this show my eyes genuinely swelled up . like. physically. fun timez fun timez
that being said, its hilarious that wen xu goes to cloud recesses like 'come out or ill kill all these hostages' and then DOESNT WAIT FOR AN ASWER AND KILLS THEM ALL IMMEDIATELY. do u know how blackmail works sir
 would like to make it recorded that from day one i was like 'CALL A GODDAMN CULTIVATION G20 THIS ASSHOLE SECT IS LITERALLY MASSACRING YALL!!' and it took them like 3 or 4 massacres to do anything and they STILL sent their heirs into their territory  LIKE
when wwx cites the gusu lan rules to wen chao tho. that rebel/attention whore/cutie pie 'look lan zhan i DID memorize the rules after all' ‘also a big fuck you to the wen sect :D :D’ sweet spot that scene achieves . delicious
all the cultivator young masters being petty af even though they are practically prisoners at the cave is hilarious and i love them
hurt and comfort + gay mistunderstandings + watsonian gay declaration music + accidental evil acquisition! at the cave (2)
its like where do i start? the fact theyre both trapped and kind of heavily injured inside an isolated cave with a murder turtle? wwx gay panicking lwj into coughing up bad blood? lwj being jealous as wwx babbles abt mianmian? telling him he shouldnt play with people and wwx saying he never played him? wwx going Oh. I See what is happening. YOU like mianmian, and lwj absolute done face ??? (iconic) wwx touching the sacred married ribbon Again? the telepathic communication? the sword? WEI WUXIAN ASKING LAN WANGJI TO SING TO HIM AS HE IS PASSING OUT AND LWJ SINGING HIM. THE SONG. HE WROTE. FOR WWX. AND THAT HE CALLED. THEIR SHIP NAME????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
they are SO insufferable pleeeeease
in the words of my friend 1 : “CQL is so gay we were all amazed how it got past the censors Ofc unfortunately it can't be novel level gay But they did their best And we love them for it”
in the theme of songs THIS OST. WUJI HAS BEEN LIVING IN MY MIND RENT FREE SINCE I FIRST HEARD IT the whole ost is so so sO beautiful.
 the costuming in this is also soooo exquisite. the embroidery? the fabrics? the details? how every sect and clan has a distinct style and architecture? (also ik they based each off of dif periods in chinese history which is REALLY fucking cool) just chefs kiss
the direction too!. i enjoy the unusual camera movements and i think they give it that Vibe, also their composition is PARTICULARLY good when it comes to telling the subtext through position of camera/position of character (like nhs off to the side in scenes he at first glance doesnt need to be/ how lwj is often centered when hes Jealous Yearning at wwx being affectionate w other ppl, wwx return from burial mounds etc)
ik madam yu is like Badass Milf Check and shes not getting any mom of the year awards but im delighted at how messy she is. IMAGINE that woman on tiktok
you better have enjoyed gay cave (2) bc its Just Pain from here on out! 
jiang fengmian and madame yu win the Most Dramatic Way to show they do care about each other, actually ..... ever :)
i thought jiang yanli jiang cheng and wei wuxian forcing themselves to escape yunmeng barely holding on after their parents are killed was going to be the height of pain in this show. ha. 
the family dynamics in general on this showwwww, both blood/ adopted/ found families, brotherly bonds and lifelong friendships just. rly. truly. fucked me up. theyre all so important and complicated and well rounded and beautiful and tragic
and beyond being a Win For the Gays im so glad the relationships w wwx and jiang yanli/ wen qing were NOT changed from platonic bc they are so much better like that imo. like maybe if we didnt Live In A Society it wouldnt be so, but the fact wwx and others can love and value them so much and theres nothing romantic or sexual abt it is like. so refreshing. especially @ jyl, with the way he and jc are overprotective of her and shes such a nurturing/care taker figure for them, it would just not vibe as well if they made it romantic
i love that this is a story abt Wei Wuxian, the Yiling Patriarch aka Actual Satan/Boogey Man/Village With/Public Enemy Number One , my dude is literally a necromancer who only dresses in black and has evil smokey black tendrils wafting out of him, but the really edgy one is still jiang cheng, pastel purple fashion icon
and speaking of best/worst siblings wei wuxian and jiang cheng *immediately starts crying* 
The Golden Core Transfer i just. no thots only tears 
wen qing and wen ning putting themselves in so much danger just.... to help them. wn saving jc from wen chao. wq finding a way to get wwx to transfer his core. like thinking about the monumental work these two did to help wwx and jyl and jc... jyl trying so fucking hard to be strong and keep on moving and giver her little brothers comfort after losing everything... jiang cheng. losing his parents and his home and his ability to do anything abt it and his complete desperation and lack of self worth and turning on them with agression  when he didnt realize all that they did for him ... hhhhhhhhhhhhh
me, pointing at the whole cast “i just LOVE them mom!!!”
its sad tho, that BARELY ANY of the women have like.... actual important conversations let alone relationships with each other at all in the story. and like wq and jyl have stayed at the same place for extended periods of time, where wq actively took care of her TWICE,  and still! not one measly convo, nothing! ................ .𝓌ₕᵧ
everyone in this show need a good sip of Self Worth and Stop Sacrificing Yourself juice 
ngl the sword flying looks very dumb 
“a-cheng, please bring a-xian back.” “i will, i promise.” ;-;
the whole calling each other by the More Intimate Version of the name, first as teasing and later as true intimacy. mmmhmmm yes
untamed where everythings the same but wwx evil flute song is eoeo
related that scene when wwx comes back from the burial mounds for the first time w demonic cultivation and he acts all formal and calls lwj hanguang-jun and keeps being evasive and distant and mean and soooooo................. facetious 
and how hes kind of desperately trying to keep intense lwj at bay (A FIRST) and avoiding actually talking to either of them and its all tension ughhh and then he MOCKS his and lwjs relationship, he jokes w him in this like... mean echo of their usual ~banter~ oof 
 and like!!! uncertain but so relieved jc who just HUGS him w no reservations for once and its not like he isnt just as worried as lwj abt wwx and what hes doing, but he chooses in that moment to enjoy getting him back first and mmhmMMMmMm yes (maybe my favorite scene in the whole show? MAYBE SO. ) 
highkey hurt me but also. i might be into mean wwx. i will take no criticism.
lan zhans sad eyes tho :((((((((( 
on one hand i wish we could have seen what happened at the burial mounds but on the other the timeskip adds so much flair to his return so im hnnn
also i love that hes been missing for 3 months reappears kinda melancholic and bloodthirsty and knowing malign tricks and jc is like 'so. are u sad bc of lan wangji'
when ur bae survived the war but he thinks ur evil/ might be evil so you cant kiss :///
hmmm talking at the rooftop under the moonlight not mentioning everything that stands between usssss
they are the two jades of lan and we’ll be the two heroes of yunmeng is the type of line u dont even need to know whats gonna happen to know thats gonna be sad
when they fight wen ruoshan at the nightless city i thought that was the battle we see at the first ep and its not and its so easy and theyre all like ‘yayy we won go wwx!’ i was just. SCREAMS WHAT is gonna HAPPEN
so like. post burial mounds/sunshot campaign pre yiling patriarch wwx is like. ultra arrogant, ultra mocking, peak lil shit and it gave me e v e r y t h i n g i wanted
even tho having the wen prisoners at the targets at phoenix mountain and still having wwx and jzx shooting the arrows was???? so.... tone deaf 
wwx: fucking w demonic energy   jyl: he has never done anything wrong in his life, ever <3 <3 (mood)
the parallels between meng yao/wei wuxian (and even xue yang a bit?) are Seen and they are Valid
wwx post burial mounds: can yall SHUT UP abt the goddamn sword (suibian left the chat)
LIKE truly, we talk abt the angst and yearning with wangxian. but what abt wwx and suibian. xianbian / xianqing angst and comfort 100k
take a shot everytime someone coughs up blood
zidian is simply the coolest spiritual weapon rip to suibian and chenqing and bichen and sendou and baixa........ but tis the truth 
cons: everyones families died in a nightmare war! everyones homes burned to the ground! everyone is traumatized! pros: everyone gets cooler clothes and weapons!!
wen ning and a-yuan and yanli bestest babes squad dont touch me rn
everyone: brooding and fighting                                                                wq and jyl: why dont you try some acupunture/drinking some soup and calm down huh? how abt that bitch?? 
showing the battle/massacre at the nightless city first was genius actually bc then everytime we have a cute scene w yunmeng bros and theyre like 'we'll be together forever! uwu' youre like oh. oh no. oh no no no. 
justice vs lawfulness vs means and ends 👁
jc: stay in the right path and practice the art of the sword                        wx: yeah thats not gonna happen chief
my reaction to wwx renouncing to the sect politics to help the wens was just that elmo burning gif in succession
the dramatic rain. wen qing desperately calling out to wen ning. the ghosts/puppets killing the guards. how terrifying wn actually was while wwx was controlling him :( lwj goeing after him to try and stop him and then he just; he Sees him and understands him even if he cant actually do anything about it other than let them go. 
“there must be somewhere in this earth we can go to :(((((((((”
"IF I HAVE TO FIGHT THEM, I'D RATHER IT BE YOU. DYING BY YOUR HANDS WOULD AT LEAST BE WORTH IT." oh my god oh my god oh my goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooddddddd
also lwjs umbrella is white w black smoke.. .  . nice
yiling patriarch / demonic farming burial mounds settlement is like one of my favorite concepts. they an "EVIL" FARMING COMMUNITY LED BY THE VILLAGE WITCH COME ON
they planted TURNIPS and LOTUS FLOWERS and ONE (1) baby and made lanterns and a common hall :(((((((
wen qing and wei wuxian, baddest bitches and genius science best friends i absolutely LOVED to see it. they rly went ‘is anyone gonna sibling/project partner that’ and didnt wait for an answer
both wwx and jyl getting lotus ponds at the burial mounds and in lanling bc they miss lotus pier ;;;;;;;w
;;;;; wish jyl had actually gone into the burial mounds. we were robbed of jyl and wq meeting again and jyl meeting a-yuan and seeing the settlement and the homes and all ;w; at least jc did go, stab wounds and broken arms and all
wwx like... having thrown his whole life away to help the wens (yeah the sect leaders and jin guangshan in particular wanting his stygian tiger amulet was an Element but still) and not.... necessarily regretting it, but grappling with all of the consequences of it... becoming moody and drepressed at times, missing his family and lotus pier and his friends and probably simply missing being around people and causing trouble, extrovert that he is, lashing out at the wens and at a-yuan, just in general the whole messiness of that experience
the way the resentful energy does affect his temperament is rly nice bc its not too in your face,(i mean outside of the Shaky Hands of Rage) but like he clearly has a much lesser control on his anger and impulsivity (tall order) than both before bm and after hes ressurected
on that note A-YUAN BABIEST BABY BOY BEST BOY
lan zhan being like oh hey there wei ying fancy meeting u and our son here. just passing by u know how it is hmmmmMm and then PLOT TWIST having defied orders to go see him and being punished for it. oof;;
 they habent seen each other in like? a year? and now theyre tgt 10 seconds and are already parenting a child together
also lwj rly kneels down in the snow way too much to be healthy
wwx: calm down guyssss i wont lose control of demonic cultivation omgggg  .   spoiler alert: he loses control of demonic cultivation
did u enjoy cute children? good bc now the Real Pain Begins
jiang yanli and jin zixuan rly out there APROPRIATING both disaster gays AND bury ur gays huh ;w;
i KNEW jin lings birthday was gonna fuck something up but the GASP that left my body when wwx lost control of wn and killed jin zixuan .. . . 
im sorry and thank you aaaaAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaAAAAaAAAAA 
when wen ning and wen qing were telling wwx their plan i was saying NO NO NO NO NO NO out loud in despair 
also can we talk abt how wq is definetely talking about only the both of them surrending themselves but then? everyone else just surrenders w them? IT MAKES NO SENSE LIKE WHY WOULD THEY what would be the Point
 sometimes there are some pretty gaping jumps in logic and continuity that are just like                     ?          ?
wwx: oh so when you try to murder me its justified but when i survive through dark magic and murder all of you its a "war crime"
unsurprisingly, his most feral, most spiraling moment talking to the sect leaders on the roof and attacking them and even fighting lan zhan is among my favorite scenes... its like, so painful to watch but also   so       thrilling   (and maybe my wen bbs dying arose some resentful energy in me what can i say) 
and its JUST, all they ever wanted was to do good but then... war. and trauma. and hubris. 
jiang cheng on the ground clearly thorn between what to do and feel is a Mood, lets just say
i was already crying when jyl showed up, but if i wasnt-
 i suffered SO MUCH through this series trying to figure out WHY jc would kill wwx. and when i understood. its somehow not as bad as i thought and also MUCH MUCH WORSE
a look into my group chat during the last flashback episodes:
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SO ANYWAY. after the BLOOD BATH and RIPPING YOUR HEART OUT and FEEDING IT TO YOU  the untamed goes ‘ayy back to the present!! tu du dud ud du’ 
literally it ends a quarter into an episode and then KEEPS GOING i had to pause and stare blankly at the ceiling for an hour
babie cultivators and detective soulmates . i do need some cute after All of That 
(not that the pain is over LOL)
lwj is significantly less emotionally repressed in the present and its delightful. hes just ALL IN with wwx. and not just in the ‘i would and have killed various men and risked my reputation for you’ but also ‘ur tired here have a drink i brought it up cause i know u like it and it want you to be happy, always’
“when everyone praised me and wanted my power, you were the only one that challenged me. now that everyone hates me and wants me dead, youre the only one that stands by my side.” hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhnnnnnnnnnnnnnn 
and just filling in the blanks how lan zhan searched for him. for all of those 16 years he searched for him and was punished for it and raised a-yuan, the only survivor of the burial mounds settlement, as his own in gusu......
and jiang cheng.  being the tough love uncle . having raised the yunmeng jiang clan from the rubble all alone, his whole family dead, some of it on the blame of his own brother, his siblings, his closest friends gone.......and only jin ling there needing his guidance. 
THE PARALLEL BETWEEN JIN LING BEING A LIFELINE FOR JIANG CHENG AND A-YUAN FOR LAN WANGJI AFTER THE BATTLE AT THE NIGHTLESS CITY  
great now i made myself sad
and like . the fact! that lwj and jc dislike each other!!. jc projects blame onto him for wwx both “leaving” him and indirectly causing their families deaths and when hes so consumed by it he makes wwx an enemy, lwj is there now? trying to protect him?? and lwj, who can never understand the pain that wwx , indirectly or not put jc through, but who was right there when jc tried to kill him and will never allow him to hurt wwx again. and how they like. in a way project blame of their tragedies onto each other while dealing with some type of survivor guilt and in their own way still loving wwx through it all???  amd in way its kind of fundamentally selfish but also tragically understandable? and like when u put it against the fact that after he disappears during the sunshot campaign they were looking for him together and fought together??
JUST. THE CHARACTERS. AND THE RELATIONSHIPS IN THIS. MAN. UGH. GOD. 
and like i think thats what makes it so good? its such a sad and painful and violent story, edgy even, but its compelling bc at the center of it there are all of these relationships and different types of love and hope and. :( i love it
enough crying lets talk abt wwx sleeping at the jingshi with lwj and wearing his under garment for a minute 🙏
 jin ling just has that Was Raised by JC energy tho lmao i love him
babie cultivator squad is the perfect ammount of cute and comedic relief while still bearing the weight? of the narrative in a way, both from sizhui and jin lings existences, and also. like. how do i put this. they feel hopeful? they were born after a war, they came of age at a time of relative peace, they dont hold on so closely to the resentments of their parents/father figures, they are specifically shown as more accepting and open minded. and its like.... Hope for the future  
one of the ?? things  i love the most is the fact that the main cast are often in situations where theyre hunted/running but they like. never wear disguises... just going around in their gorgeous expensive clan clothes and hair ornaments and distinctive spiritual weapons.... maybe w a straw hat on, just for kicks
wwx teacher 🥺🥺🥺
so this is why its called Yi City Misery huh
a-qing is such. an icon. im so sad. my girl even knew to leave xys dumb self rotting by the road but no one listens to her thats why theyre all dead or sad 
her and xue yang measuring each other up was so entertaining lmao
 its the funniest thing when hes like. HERES MY SAD STORY. FOR WHY IM A SADISTIC MURDERER. I BROKE MY HAND ONCE. 
like ok someone broke his hand in a horrible way, and like Poverty, i get it but also like.......... that lost the brunt of a proper sob story like, 50 sadistic murders ago bby
and i love that xingchen does not entertain that for a second hes like ‘not ?????? good enough???’ and the best thing is he wasnt even like 'u hadto be the bigger person' or sth but ' well then break that dudes hand back, rip his arm off for i care, what do the rest of us have to do w anything???” 
anjo sensato :(
xue yang is like..... the sexy sadistic evil version of a himbo..... a meanbo...
the fucked upness of xy’s feelings for xxc/ xxc and sl feelings for each other... like my dude literally gave his bf HIS EYES. and xy getting so attached to xxc .... the fucked up fake domesticity.... having him hurt sl..... then desperately trying to bring him back ...................... oof
song lan........... literally had his eyes AND tongue removed, his bfs eyes put in place, was almost killed, turned into a puppet by his bf unknowingly, manipulated by xy, sees his bf killing himself in despair.... and STILL finds the strenght to get up from there, and keep on traveling and helping people and attempting to fix xxcs soul.......... like, my man. damn. 
wangxian looking at songxiao and seeing an Actually more painful parallel for themselves. ft. that Color Coding. 
THE A-YUAN/SIZHUI REVEAL PUNCHED ME IN THE HEART but in a good way for a change
should have know that he would be the Best Boy the cute one w all the braincells
the butterfly AND the bunny lantern. i see how it is
u know is very convenient that no one can see the stark black veins on wen nings neck, ever 
BAT WEN NING 
wns face when lwj comes into wwx room like ‘:0 omg did u two finally get your shit together? good for you master wei good for u’ 
(they didnt) (yet)
DISASTER DRUNK LWJ. JUST. THRUST SOME CHICKENS TO SHOW UR RESSURECTED BAE THAT U LOVE THEM.
i have absolutely no idea WHY they gave lwj the same punishment for fighting his own sect/allies to protect the burial mounds as when they got drunk on cloud recess class days.... like? its such a ... emotional continuity error again
also is lwj gonna get an actual friend besides wwx , ever
mianmian marrying and having a family and a cute life after saying FUCK U AND UR SYSTEM TOO in a much less unhinged and dramatic way than wwx......... fills me w joy
also lol the idea that like. her husband not knowing that shes friends w satan/the boogey man/the village witch is hilarious
i love nie mingjue bc hes the resident Though Guy but also the most dramatic bitch in this show and thats Saying Something
jin ling cant have one uneventful relative can he
the fact that everyone present already knew “mo xuanyu” was wwx at the stairs is so funny, their faces are like ‘oh............ wow. that. sure is a development. shock” 
in the tradition of extremely loud whispers wwx tells lwj with twelve guards standing like one meter away from them: HEY PSH LAN ZHAN PRETEND IM FORCING YOU TO STAY W ME DO IT
oh my god oh my god
the absolute Yearning on his face when he leaves wwx and a-yuan at the burial mounds and refuses to stay for dinner was already Enough but the fact?? they brought it back?? to this declaration of love?? their expressions??????? strike me dead right now just go ahead
lFor Legal Reasons We Cant Kiss but we will have a very sappy declaration of love and trust and look at each other in way that is the actualization of 💞💘💗💖💓💘💞💗💖💘💗💖💕💞
also icb all the sect leaders and guards are standing there watching them say they like like each other with a dozen swords pointing at their neck
i enjoyed the depiction of the fickle public perception and how easily it can be used to scapegoat people. when the sect leaders turn on jgy and wwx knows thats its more for convenience than anything else...
poor lxc is literally like 'oh so when YOUR problematic boyfriend gets called evil its a misunderstanding but when its MY problematic bf-'
ok like i cant get over nmj let jgy play a song that messed with his temperament at all, like maN u KNEW he might be shady wth
wwx: “hey dont say anything bad abt lan zhan hes not an arrogant dick, thats just his face. 
ME ON THE OTHER HAND"
the cultivators as wwx is poking holes in their narrative is literally *nazaré meme*
"wei wuxian-!" "what did i break your leg, too?" not to be problematic but i laughed so hard
not as hard as "you dont have the rank to talk to me " tho
i Enjoy that, over the course of story, wwx sees that... theres nothing truly to Do, but move on. he saw how his arrogance and his mistakes hurt others, and hes trying to fix what he can, but he already did die for his mistakes and there are things he cant fix and that's. just how it is. even towards jgy, the narrative doesn't go gleefully and completely with "lets make THEM pay bc theyre the big bad" bc its not that simple, and it wouldn't lead anywhere but more pain...
re him and jiang cheng and the wens and kinda. isnt that what nhs did? scheming to displace jgy out of revenge more than any justice and doing so in the most painful way?
idk if that actually makes sense im truly just babbling
i thought the scene at the lotus pond would be CUTE but the context was PAIN again
jiang cheng finding out about his golden core and his conflict with wwx at the guanyin temple .... destroyed me but in a nice way kinda.... same way it destroys him look at his face oh god
and. the fact??? he sacrificed himself for wwx?? first?? and he'll probably never tell anyone much less wwx???? keeps me up at night
i havent decided if the neckbreak transition between jgy does sth super Evil or does he he does OR Does He yes he does O R does heeeee is sth i dislike or not
jin guangyao and wei wuxians most interesting parallel is that... theyve both seen 'hmm hey this system is fucked up' and wwx went 'so fuck it all i will renounce it and challenge it' and jgy went 'so fuck it i will use all of it to my advantage and manipulate it to my goals and whims'
the fact jgys mom was actually great and he loved her and his whole issue w it was more than simply being ashamed of being a bastard kinda got me ngl
never trust a dude with a fan.
nhs and jgy: the first rule to a convoluted and decades spanning violent revenge plot is to have fun and be yourself! 
when a-yuan finally FINALLY remembers ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;-;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; wen ning has someone in his family back and a-yuan has someone to talk abt his wen family and wwx has him back bc he survived and lwj raised him anD HES THEIR SON. THEYRE MARRIED AND HAVE A SON. UGH.
and theyre allowed to heal. everyone is allowed to try and recover and be happy
netflix put all of the 3 endings on top of each other and it looks kinda weird actually BUT I DONT EVEN MIND :’’’’’’’’’)
the gasp that left me when lwj says ‘wei ying’ and wwx turns.........
there was also a screen with ‘thank you mxtx for creating these characters, we hope their wishes come true’ and i might. have cried then too. maybe. 
that was . a ride. as is proven by this behemot of a ramble clearly i just really needed and Outlet. i am currently trying to convince dumb monkey brain to not consume the other medias of mdzs immediately bc i REALLY need to like. live. a life. and take care of real responsibilities.  *longest oh boi ever*
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YOUR TAGS ON MY SIS POST??? IMMACULATE
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I will include my tags again but only because i cant get enough of myself and not to sound like im tooting my own kazoo but this is the one time in my entire life that ive been objectively correct in every way
Lengthy and unrelated thing under the cut: 
Let me talk about canon bro for a second 😌 even though its barely and tangentially related to this and you dont have to read it <3, in fact i would encourage you not to read it i just wanna run my mouth. People love to use him as a cheap villain in their dave angst fics which is like... hilarious to me. Like i get it, since hes abusive he must also be misogynistic and homophobic and transphobic and also genuinely hates dave and revels in his suffering right? Lmeow no, hes just some guy and despite everything he is in fact trying his best. Hes naturally intense and aggressive and this doesnt translate well to child rearing, especially since his one goal is to make dave strong enough (physically and mentally) to Survive whats coming. The random sneak attacks ? The traps littered around the house ? To keep dave on his toes and buff his spatial awareness. The cameras ? To monitor his progress (if hes not up to standard then we’ll just up the “training”) and / or film some puppet snuff (puff ? Snupp?) so he can keep running his dumb website and like provide for them or some shit , or ig to buy random crap and throw it around the house. Who cares if the kid sees the porn anyway its just puppets, plus hes seen way worse at that age and turned out fine (no he didnt). Dave has to be resourceful , he has to be creative and think on his feet , lets have impromptu rap battles and scrabble games. He has to know numbers like the back of his hand (idk why this is even a phrase do any of you memorise what the back of your hands looks like) to effectively utilise his sylladex.... actually nobody even uses that shit idk why bro was so insistent on it. Dave is his protege, his charge, dave is NOT his friend and hes not gonna let him forget that. He teaches him all he knows, in the way he knows. Making comics, mixing music, ironic jokes, being cool and getting shit done. Actually its GOOD that the kid is terrified of him, if hes the scariest thing in the room then dave wont fear anything else. Lets spar then, if dave wins then hes trained him well. If dave loses then hell become resilient. Either way he has to be strong or else hell die, training is necessary. Its either this or failure and failure equals death. Do your own laundry, ration your own food, become independent as fast as possible because i wont be around to take care of you forever
Nothing bro does is without reason, neither is it “sadism”, its all very logical to him despite being horrific to any sane person because his only friend is the mansplain-manipulate-manspread puppet that raised him and he has awful coping mechanisms that barely stretch past beating himself 1. up 2. off. Like he kept his baby alive to the point where it could keep itself alive (kind of alive) and thats a win to him.
That was my thesis on why bro is not a bigot like ,, he makes porn of fucking smuppets, that gives him zero chance to fetishize The Ladies. I doubt he has porno mags littered around the house its just endless plushie dicks and asses (and the two puppets handcuffed together were legit kinda funny like Why). So why would dave have internalised homophobia if it did not stem from his brother ??? Acting as if his only friends werent exuding anti gay vibes, like christ, john “im not a homosexual” egbert, him and rose’s competitive flirting gag (before they found out they were related >.>), just generally the three of them accusing each other of being gay, yknow, as kids do (jade is exempt from the argument we love jade here). Things were just more homophobic back then and its not like bro and dave had a sincere talk about gender and sexuality in the 13 or so years they lived in the same house like why would you even come out to your younger sibling if you could just not !!! Lol !!! I could be getting all this info wrong lol so correct me if im wrong but bro has this cute comic artstyle and it was about someones charge (? Sibling?) straight up dying and the saw guy makes an appearance the end , like there was no sex or gore or whatever but if you look at sbahj the second page literally has an incest sex joke like where does dave even get his material from , which online sites has he been trawling , well haha its not bros job to monitor his kids search history lets ignore it and move on if the kid wants to be gross and make dumb jokes who is he to judge , spread your problematic wings and soar into the cancel clouds little guy
Anyway heres a disclaimer: if youre gonna clown on this post and tell me im an abuse apologist or some shit just understand that i have a lot of free time and love being a huge asshole when provoked but like youre so welcome to add to the discussion i love bullying my favourite character bro strider by steamrolling him we’ve talked about trans rights for too long now is the time for trans wrongs
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yaboyspodcastpalace · 3 years
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For the character asks: Jon, Peter Lukas, Annabelle Cane? (giving multiple suggestions so you can pick one in case you get the same character twice in different asks)
very kind of you to assume i get many asks :') THANKS ill do all of them u_u
[Send me a character and i'll tell you...]
(under the cut bc i love talking and this got long lmao)
Jon
First impression
he's a uptight prick with obvious favoritism for sasha and tim and i love him so! much!!!!!!
Impression now
my poor little mew mew hm................I've got a complicated relationship w/ jon bc i love him a lot, but i loved s1 him the most, and literally everything else just makes me really, brutally, sad ;_; The way he tries so desperately to cling to his humanity and how other characters just call him by the title imposed to him makes me wanna cry
...also he just cares so much ;_; i cry
Favorite moment
probably his interactions with georgie at the beginning of season 3!!! From s5 id say when he killed not!sasha, it felt vindictive ù_ú
Idea for a story
Dhfhdh im p basic when it comes to him ngl, either jon/tim/sasha friends to lovers or jon and desolation!tim or *something*!sasha trying to stay as human as possible, together 😔 (or just any of them living and coping together in s4 n s5)
Unpopular opinion
Im just not a fan of monster jon, at all! He's not the type of character that i enjoy seeing having a corruption arc unfortunately!! It just hurts!!! (and this Is from someone that Loves corruption arcs!!!)
Also i really hate moth jon imagery??? For not particular reason, moths are pretty, but i still hate it u_u AND THE ASSOCIATION OF GREEN W/ JON (or the beholding in general!) I CANNOT STAND IT!! i know its bc of the tma logo but guess what! Its wrong! Purple jon rights!!!
ALSO ALSO the so called pining he had for martin just.... didnt felt like that at all! i have Many feelings abt this!
Favorite relationship
either georgie in s3, or sasha!!! i love how he always praises sasha in her research in s1 and even thought he's at his driest & sharp Trying-To-Project-Professionalism-And-Skepticism she still rolls into his office, interrupts him mid statement to banter w/ him abt pronunciation n stuff and its just Normal, like that speaks volumes of how comfortable they felt around each other! they were friends gdi! the moment he realizes she died and then everytime the not!them mocks him w/ her death makes me wanna break smth q_q
im not even gonna mention tim bc even though i love their relationship It 👏 makes me👏 very 👏 sad 👏
non shippy and also staying strictly canon, i love his relationship with melanie!
Favorite headcanon
sometimes i think abt that one hc that hes really good with arcade games bc he lived near the coast and i smile bc thats cute :) also hes a trans man 💙💗🤍💗💙
Peter
First impression
Mystery evil captain man!!! Fog?? I LOVE him :)
Impression now
I STILL LOVE HIM SO MUCH!!!!!!!!! Hes an asshole and has a lovely voice and smile and hes not, hes not Dumb but also he's far from the whooooa evil lonely influence he think he is (played like a cheap fiddle). He also makes me sad in ways i cannot and wont describe, and its a shame that he died cuz he was the best part of season 4 😔 rip you beautiful bastard man i still miss you </3
Favorite moment
"It has blood on it" "thats Leitner's too :D". Also when martin was angry abt idk, breekon? Jon going into the coffin? Cant remember, but peter was like I said id protect the institute, that guys not my problem ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Idea for a story
dfgdfg i have..... a petermart story that dealt with the different flavor of loneliness they both had, half smut half genuine meta of both of them and theorization on the branching of an Entity & how their powers manifested in other people...
basically, peter thinks hes hot shit when it comes to loneliness but gets overwhelmed when martin accidentally projects his feelings abt *fic's plot stuff* on him, its fun stuff!
Unpopular opinion
people either paint him like an absolute devil or an incompetent idiot and hes neither of them! hes an asshole who loves being an asshole but far from the worst monster in the show and he tried to do a clever scheme TWICE on his life and 1. while it was established that any of the rituals wouldnt work singularly the Silence was still a pretty clever attempt if it weren't for gertrude! and 2. well... he tried to manipulate someone petty and formerly supposed to be a web avatar, again not his fault, cant call him stupid for trying dfgdfg
i Do think hes kinda pathetic in some sense considering his backstory, but more out of personal pity than anything else
Favorite relationship
Canonically speaking him and martin! The pull and push of them was The best thing about season 4! Peter being a quite dangerous avatar and martin, beautiful and scared and kinda feisty, confronting him every chance he gets, peter doing his best to manipulate him and martin letting him believe hes succeeding (even thought, he is, partly). They're fascinating characters to have side by side
Favorite headcanon
Partly canonically speaking him and mikaele salesa :) they do bets together! They're lonely sea men! What else could you possibly want?
Also non shippy i like thinking abt peter's and simon's relationship but thats entirely non canon ♡
Diversity wins! The heir of the lonely is a gay man!
Also I think as every rich household(?) the lukases had many paintings and peter as a kid saw the ones w/ sailing ships and imagined sailing far far away from his family. That and seaman aesthetic fucks, which is why he always has the same vibe going on as an adult. He does Not know half of the things he'd need to know to have a ship though but hey he's rich and thats all he needs
Annabelle
First impression
thats a horrible psychological experiment they're making there D:
Impression now
THATS STILL A HORRIBLE EXPERIMENT AND ANNABELLE DESERVED SO MUCH BETTER............. idk! she makes me sad in the same way jon (and to a degree, peter) does! to be a living puppet for the thing that traumatized you as a kid and that later kinda killed you / is the only thing keeping you alive, to be devoted to it scrambling to believe in a higher reason for all of it to happen bc to believe otherwise is............. anyway. i love her, and i feel so so sorry for her
Favorite moment
her "maybe ive never been to the beach" at the end of ehr statement (that i fully believe its bullshit but, yknow, i love that she adds that), most of her convos with martin, her "i told you this might happen" "you did, you did" with mikaele
Idea for a story
i think a lot about her having conversations w/ either mikaele (platonically) or sasha (shippy) and their different points of views and treat with her making her doubt the web a bit
Unpopular opinion
listen, listen, i know it sounds like im woobifying her i Know it but reading the scraps of her story how can i Not feel sorry for her? when the story framed her very similar to jon? the supernatural childhood encounter that gave them arachnophobia and the subsequential joining with an Entity against her will? the fact that both the story and the fans treat her like a spider woman always sat very very bad to me, and the fact that the story itself always framed her like a villain (considering All The Other Characters that get the benefit of the doubt) was extremely disappointing
Favorite relationship
her and mikaele!!!!!!! wish we could have seen more scenes of just the two of them!!!!!! *singing* he is her daaaaaad, hes her dad! boogie boogie boogie! (ok no but like... their offscreen friendship is my favorite thing of season 5 ;_;)
Favorite headcanon
Sigh i dont know...i still think she's scared of spiders which make her current existence harder but thats a sadcanon :/ umm...... i love the idea of mikaele and her cooking together from time to time! Mikaele showing her some plates he used to eat as a kid as he talks stories about his life :) and she listens and sometimes tells a story of her own! its been so long since he had a quasy normal conversation! its weird yet nice!
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lemongogo · 4 years
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1 dude i love when you talk abt kny and bring up little details i forgot/missed hearing peoples thoughts always adds to the experience :') Also it brings back excitement idk if u ever felt like this but i feel a bit guilty bc i kinda forget abt it most of the time ? idk but bc of the somewhat disappointing ending (i was hardcore on board of the new arc with demon slayer nezuko after tanjiro became a demon but just overall disappointed with how that ended) + the fact that i wont get any content
2 for almost a year bc i wont be able to see the movie until april/may 2021 maybe?? since it doesn't come out in theaters (i only recently watched heroes rising bruh) + the fact that season 2 is till up in the air all that’s made me kinda numb to it and i feel so guilty bc kny meant so much to me at one point its probably the piece of media thats given me the most feelings ever hhh and now i feel guilty bc most of that is gone ?? idk its kinda dumb have you ever felt the same way ?
ah thank u !! its v special 2 me, i appreciate that u still look at them even when its nonsense AHAH 🥺️🥺️ the excitement overwhelms me, i cant help but talk abt it :3
but omg no !! thats not dumb @ all and im rly sorry u feel guilty about it !! :-( even though that initial excitement and attachment might have faded for u , i think its really awesome you had a connection to it at one point or another !! i dont get attached to media very easily (i usually fixate on one or two series for a few years at a time) & so maybe its different for u, but the fact that it meant a lot to u at one point is like..  its cool !! i dont want to dismiss how u currently feel about it obviously , but . i always appreciate the brevity of it all sometimes. theres so much to experience and so much to read and involve urself with that itd be impossible to hold it close to u forever, which is what makes that small amount of time u have with something so meaningful. 
imo its hard to keep interest in things that have ended anyways, & given kny’s situation, i can definitely understand why it isn’t that memorable . as you mentioned, the ending was rly rly underwhelming and didnt leave much of a lasting impression. the biggest antagonist had maybe half a chapter of backstory / motivation (if u call it that), the chapters & fight scenes became repetitive and hard to decipher, a lot of characters were left underutilized, and the poor handling of demon!tanjiro leaves a lot to be desired. ++ its pretty short all things considered and theres not a Whole lot of content to focus on compared to other series 
to answer ur question though, i have !! i can’t think of any examples off the top of my head (fmab might be one of them, ironically; i dont think about it too much Because i was satisfied. theres nothing else i wished to see from the characters or anything i’d have done different from memory so i don’t tend to think abt it much anymore) but i think a lot of the guilt i tend to feel comes from all the “what ifs”. what if the author took this path instead, what if the author didn’t do this, what if they had more time to accomplish their goals, etc. bc to me it shows that i liked the potential, just not the execution. and it sucks bc u can’t really change it. i end up feeling guilty because i want to be attached but i just . cant anymore yknow. stories inevitably change, sometimes for the worse, but !! i guess what im trying to say is that ur feelings are important !! theres ultimately no need to hold onto something you dont find enjoyment or interest in anymore, though its also completely okay to wish things had been different too. and if the only time you remember kny is when i mention it, thats okay too ;-)
SDFNDSKJF its a complicated mess of feelings and stuff but i wouldnt feel too bad 🥺️  !!! i hope theres something out there that ur really into right now !!!! and thanks again for the sweet affirmation, tht makes me feel better sjsks <3
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cherrysunflowers · 4 years
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ALSO both of them for the nsfw meme bc why not
u asked for it :)) 
ok these may not be completely accurate bc we havent gotten into the swing of writing them yet bUT IM STILL PUMPED ???
• who kissed who first?
d&j: diana def took one for the team there n kissed jasper first I feel like?? he'd probably be in the middle of yelling at her about how much he loves her and how she betrayed him by leaving n turning into a different person when BAM she just kisses him to shut him up.
d&t: ok I feel like maybe daisy would?? like I imagine they just finished their first date and theo was a Respectful Young Man, but didn't DARE kiss her, so when he walks her up to her door, she’d go inside, but then race back on out to PLANT ONE ON HIM AYOOO
• who made the first move? 
d&j: ok lets face it this would also be diana bc jasper would be too much of a pussy to do anything, esp bc he wouldn't ever wanna make di uncomfy or upset with anything he does bc he just loves her too much :’(
d&t: I feel like this would be mutual?? like the two of them would just look at each other and would just know, y’know? like ofc I feel like theo would be the type to ask for consent, but the two of them would just know when the time is right. 
• what’s the relationship like? 
d&j: I feel like their relationship is very much how it was when they were best friends, except with the perks of kissing and it not being weird when jasper touches her butt yknow lmao?? like it would just kinda be like a friendship, where everything’s back to somewhat normal, and diana’s calling the shots n jasper is just along for the ride :’)
d&t: ok but this would be so soft and innocent I :’( like just them glancing at each other all timidly but lovingly, never letting go of each other, whether its holding hands, or just holding onto each other. like it would very much just be a first love kind of love, if that makes any sense. 
• who’s the most possessive?
d&j: dIANA I FEEL LIKE LMAO I FEEL LIKE HOMEGIRL DOES NOT FUCK AROUND WHEN IT COMES TO THE PPL SHE LOVES, so whenever any girl comes towards jasper, she's just got her claws out and she's ready 2 kill omg
d&t: lowkey feel like this could be theo?? bc of the things quinn told him before he died. like, I feel like he takes those words so seriously, so whenever someone would show any sort of interest towards daisy, he would definitely show them who's boss but in his own cute socially awkward way. 
• what’s their favourite way to kiss?
d&j: idk about diana, but jasper would just love to nuzzle her neck, shoulder, chest, anYWHERE and kiss her there?? like he'd just love the snuggly aspect of kissing, where they’re holding onto each other n he feels the warmth of her body on his yknow :’)
d&t: I feel like daisy is all about the tenderness of it all? like the tender touches, like she’d def have a hand gently caressing his cheek or jaw as they kiss, and she’d always be up on her tippy toes bc she's so much shorter than him and :’)
• who tops during sex? 
d&j: I feel like this is a mix, sort of? like the two of them would just kinda go with the flow of it all, and whoever tops is just like,,, okay with them yknow. just as long as its pleasing the both of them, I don't think they’d care. 
d&t: since these babies are both Innocent, I feel like it would be theo who would top at first? and then after talking about it, and daisy worrying about if hes doing all the work, she would try her hand at it? but again, I feel like it would be the same as di and jasper. 
• thoughts on sex toys?
d&j: jasper jokes about handcuffs and ropes all the time, but the second its made into a reality, hoMEBOY GETS SO NERVOUS AND FLUSTERED BC HES NEVER ACTUALLY USED THEM BEFORE 
d&t: ok I feel like daisy is just genuinely so innocent that she doesn't know what toys are and di would have to teach her?? but omg idk if it would ever come up with she n theo unless theo is Real Kinky or diana throws some toys at him or smth bc I get the vibe that she's into some REAL WEIRD SHIT POOR JASPER WONT KNOW WTF HES GETTIN INTO
• most sensitive areas?
d&j: jasper woud loooove getting his hair played with/pulled, or his inner thighs. mans goes crazy for that shiet, esp when they're driving and di puts her hand on his thigh oOF
d&t: daisy would dIE for neck kisses omg 
• do they shower/bathe together? if so, how far does anything go?
d&j: I feel like jasper and diana would do both?? but I don't see them in the bath as much as in the shower. and whOOF THEYD DO SO MANY SINS IN THE SHOWER PLS but also jasper would make it Diana’s personal duty to massage his hair ok hes a sucker for scalp massages  
d&t: ok I feel like they'd also shower n bathe together BUT daisy only ever takes baths to help w her muscles bc dancer, or when she's stressed?? so there would be no sexy time there, but I feel like the shower would be full of tender love making oops
• how do they like their sex?
d&j: I feel like di and jasper’s sex could either be rlly fun and they wouldn't take it seriously and its light and full of giggling and laughter, OR it would be super passionate and desperate and needy, where they’re whispering sweet/dirty things in each other’s ear and :’))
d&t: definitely soft and slow and gentle, since they r both Innocent Babies, but I feel like once they get into the swing of things, it could be super passionate and just desperate n AGH
• how rough can the sex get before its taken too far?
d&j: I feel like things could get pretty rough, but jasper would be really scared of hurting Diana, so he wouldn't take it too far. like maybe light choking, pinning down, spanking, a lil bit of biting but he wouldn’t do too much bc he wouldn't wanna hurt or overwhelm her. 
d&t: at first, I don't think either of them would even think about being rough with each other, but later on, I can see theo pinning daisy down, and daisy digging her nails into theo’s shoulders n stuff?? but it would still be soft and wholesome bc they r soft n wholesome
• favourite sex position?
d&j: jasper loves just being close to di, so he would love when she's on top in his lap riding him, and he can keep his arms around her and still nuzzle her and make eye contact w her at the same time y’know
d&t: daisy would love missionary, just bc she would wanna look at theo and take him in, and also she would be able to hold his hands and hold onto him??? idk if this makes sense I am: Dumb
• if they would have a threesome, who would their third choice be?
d&j: idk if jasper would ever wanna add a third?? he would just wanna be intimate with di bc he would just love her so much, and he would feel like a third would ruin that maybe??
d&t: oof daisy would be too insecure for a third, she's barely got sex experience down, the last thing shed want is to second guess everything even more by adding someone else oOP 
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elijahfitz · 4 years
Text
and introduction.
meet elijah.
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hey guys! im lina! im 18 and im in the cst timezone. im currently a freshman in college and ive also been rping for like 6 years now ( i started on the neopets chat boards. if thats not an embarrassing fun fact idk what is ) but i havent rped since this summer since school was and still is kicking my ass. im really into musical theater, marvel & dc, and disney! i also used to be a lifeguard at a great wolf lodge for 2 years so if u want any funny stories about stupid children, or even just wanna be friends, lmk! im also SUPER sorry this intro is so late. i was gonna do it yesterday but then my friends wanted to hang and it kinda went downhill from there. im actually posting this like 20 min before i have a lab practical so i wont be able to reply until late tonight, but like this post to plot or anything!
some fun facts abt elijah:
he was adopted when he was around 3-4? he was abandoned and left on the back of a merchant cart headed to corona, where he was then discovered and then put into the local orphanage since no one was sure where he came from or who left him. all he had was a stuffed bear (named wooly), a basket of water and fruits to eat, and a letter that explained that:
his name was elijah
he was 2 (born on february 28th)
his parents couldnt care for him, so they hoped he would be found by a kind soul who could either take care of and love him, or else get him to someone who could
they loved him and only left him in the hopes that he would have a better life
he lived in the orphanage for almost 2 years and the few months before the 2nd anniversary of his arrival, rapunzel & eugene visited the orphanage that eugene grew up in and fell in love w/ eli, promptly adopting him soon after. he barely remembers anything about his abandonment and time in the orphanage, but always wanted to find his birth parents and let them know how he turned out. he kept the bear and basket in his room but carries the letter around with him in his wallet wherever he goes.
his full name is elijah frederic fitzherbert. he was given the middle name frederic in honor of his grandfather.
but, he much rather prefers eli. doesnt mind formalities but insists on people who know him to call him by his nickname. except he HATES being called “highness” bc he thinks it sounds stupid. he wont get upset per se if u keep referring to him as “your highness” but he will get annoyed
he very much wants to fulfill his role as “corona’s golden boy” by contributing back to his people. he worries for the kingdom more than he worries for himself and is always trying to prove that he is worthy of being a prince rather than just some random kid who got lucky enough to get adopted. most of his days are spent doing modest favors and helping out the townspeople or visiting the villages surrounding the kingdom.
when he’s in the castle you can almost always find him in the kitchen! boi loves to bake and cook. he loves the way food can bring joy to everyone. he often makes goods to give to the townspeople or the kids at the orphanage, where he volunteers at least every 2 weeks when hes not busy w prince stuff.
has an acute fear of disappointment. he feels so much pressure to prove his worth that came from growing up thinking if he did anything wrong he’d be sent back to orphanage, esp since his parents had another child. they wouldn’t want or need him anymore. he mostly got over this when he broke a vase when he was 12 and tried to run away from home, except he fell out the tree that he used to climb out his window and broke his leg lmao. his parents assured him that no matter what he did they would still love him and never abandon him, and his dad also taught him how to climb trees and roofs without dying (much to his mom’s chagrin). even tho hes pretty much over it, it kinda lingers subconsciously. thus, he overcompensates in everything he does and gets overly anxious about small problems
growing up he thought the stories that his dad told him about his past were so cool, despite the fact that he would almost always only hear those stories when he was being taught lessons of what he shouldnt do. he used to run around pretending to be flynn rider and his dad played along, planning play heists for them to do together (think scott & cassie in that one scene from ant man and the wasp) but they stopped when eli hit that age where he thought it was embarrassing to play w his dad. but, it really helped him bond w eugene and help him work on his coordination bc eli is CLUMSY AF
eli legit trips over nothing at least twice a day.
he bonded w his mom through art tho, which eventually turned into aesthetic desserts and meals! thats another reason why he loves baking and cooking so much.
when his 1st sibling was born when he was 5 at first he was jealous. he didnt get much attention at the orphanage due to the fact that there were so many kids and he was just starting to get used to the idea of having parents didnt have tons of kids always trying to win their affection and attention. he thought having a little sibling was the worst thing in the world and would hide from his parents bc if they couldnt find him they couldnt send him away. he hated his sibling.
until he met them. the second he saw their chubby face he was hooked. he swore that he would do anything and everything for them. and that continued when his parents adopted his other siblings as well. he absolutely adores them and acts like the protective older bro role
thankfully, with such a large age gap eli never rlly had to go through any of those petty squabbles that siblings usually have. he was always pretty protective of them tho and would fight when he thought they were being reckless and dumb out of his own fear that if they got hurt he would be an awful big brother (again, fear of disappointment)
he loves to travel bc his mom would always take him to these extravagant kingdoms and on these amazing sightseeing trips
this boy is hopeless when it comes to love. i can imagine lots of ppl liking him on top of all the ppl throwing themselves at him bc royal, but him being completely oblivious and thinking that no one likes him.
he had rlly bad ADD as a kid but its gotten better as hes grown. he still occasionally struggles w executive functioning tho and always gets rlly frustrated when he cant focus or remember
like i said earlier, clumsy af. no coordination. the only athletic ability he ever had was horse riding and running
that said he has a horse named may (short for mayonnaise. dont ask
he likes music a lot. prob learned piano at a young age
he probably is at the party bc royals? idk
EDIT: although (currently) unknown to eli, his true birth mother is maleficent. when eli was 2, his birth father took him away from her and had her suppress eli’s natural born powers. his father realized he was unfit to care for him, so he was the one who abandoned eli.
wanted connections!!
obv his parents and siblings? i mean cmon
one ( or both???? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ) of his birth parents!!!!! they dont have to know that eli is their son or mayb they do and are too scared to tell him, but being trapped together will eventually make it revealed
childhood friends! people he met when he traveled w his mom or met at royal social functions? i rlly also want friends that he would hang w at all the royal galas and stuff and they would go do dumb stuff like look sneak out and look for secret passages of make bets of who could dump more crab cakes into the stuffy duchess’ purse when she wasnt looking
people who know him solely through his family
someone who likes eli and eli legit has no clue, no matter how much they flirt and drop hints
people who hate eli! or even just dislike him, which makes him upset bc he doesnt like the idea that there are ppl who dont like him in the world. mayb bc sometimes he gets super highstrung when things arent going how they should b and he like lashed out at them once or something. maybe they hate his parents and on principle hate him. idk
someone who was w eli in the orphanage
past relationships? i feel like hes never rlly had a bad breakup tho, its just that they prob just didnt work out. hes also bi so they can b any gender. hes still looking for his otp
idk, legit anything. send me those plots man
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negasonicimagines · 5 years
Text
Gladdest (Soulmate AU)
For this, I’ll be using the soulmate AU where what happens to your soulmate’s body happens to you. I’m not sure who originally came up with this. Basically, how it works, is like, if your soulmate gets punched in the face, you feel like you’ve been punched in the face. If your soulmate dies, you don’t die, but you feel it. Same with broken bones, you’ll feel it, but your arm won’t actually be broken. But not just pain, other stuff. Like if your soulmate cries, you’ll feel it, but you don’t cry unless they’re super heartbroken, or if they get a really good hug you feel it, too. In my version of this AU, the pain and other feeling doesn’t start until you turn sixteen. Imagine how fucked up it would be if that wasn’t the case and you had a partner older than you? Like, while 13-year old Bill gets in a fight, his soulmate, who is only 3, feels the same punches and kicks. It’d be so fucked up.
warnings: nsfw (but no actual sex, just a lot of talking about it [and masturbation] and some sexually tense scenes), the reader nearly has a panic attack (again, i know, sorry. what can I say? I project), & reader has a thing for.... erotic asphyxiation. let me know if i missed anything.
I am very open to writing a part two with smut... I just chickened out with this because I felt it wouldn’t be good writing.
You’d been sixteen for a little while now, and there hadn’t been much contact from your soulmate aside from the occasional feel of a phone falling on your face and smacking it.
It’s the beginning of a new school year at Xavier’s, and you’re pretty thrilled. Your roommate this year is your best friend, Ellie. Okay, not just your best friend, she’s your crush, too. Do I really have to say, at this point?
“Hey,” she greets you, sounding rather sullen as she enters your dorm, where you sit on the edge of your bed.
“What’s up?” you ask.
“I turned sixteen over the summer and I haven’t felt anything to give me a hint. All my soulmate does is cry.”
“All my soulmate does is drop their phone on their face,” you offer a complaint in return, and the two of you lock eyes for a moment, one of realization.
“No,” Ellie says. “No.” She’s bright red, immediately thinking of just how many hot summer nights she was kept up, orgasm after orgasm after orgasm, gasping for breath at the way her soulmate’s fingers curled just right, just fucking right. There’s no way you, her crush and her best friend, were that good.
“No, can’t be,” you agree.
“Could be,” she reminds you.
“It’d make sense,” you admit.
“I hate everyone else but you.”
“We could try to find out,” you suggest.
She pinches herself.
“Ow! Not like that!” You whine, clutching at your arm. “Oh, well, I guess it’s too late th-” Ellie cuts you off with her eyes alone.
“Where does all that energy come from, Y/N?! What are you, the Energizer bunny?! At least three times a night, every night! What the hell?!”
You blush deeply, scratching the back of your neck. You hadn’t exactly expected you’d meet your soulmate anytime soon, or that they’d be bold enough to comment on your habits.
“I dunno, I thought it was normal for kids our age…” you mumble.
“Oh, yeah, well some people like sleeping and not screaming into the pillow because their soulmate has a little too much fun doing the five finger shuffle!”
“Please, louder. I think a few people in Antarctica didn’t hear you,” you retort, looking up at her from where you were sitting with a challenging expression.
“We’ve been friends for all this time and I never knew what a horny bastard you are,” she remarks.
“Well, I’m not the one who was ‘screaming’ in pleasure,” you mutter.
“I heard that!” she says, her expression still adorably indignant.
“If you hated it so much, you should’ve just got those over the counter meds, Antifel or whatever.”
“I- I…” She sighs. “Yeah, I didn’t hate it that much,” she admits, and you smile a bit. “But I wasn’t a fan of the choking,” she adds, gesturing at your scarf, your favorite one that she never would’ve guessed hides the bruises from where you’ve choked yourself with a belt, at least not before. “I’m more of a choker than a ‘chokee’, but, I guess that’d be obvious, wouldn’t it? Considering we’re soulmates and all.”
You nod, your eyes now on your lap, the floor, her tee shirt, the lamp in the corner, anything that isn’t her eyes, and she smirks.
“Oh, so now you’re shy?”
“A little,” you quietly reply, and she sits next to you on your bed.
“Let’s cool down,” she offers. “We’ve just seen each other after months of purely texting and the occasional phone call.”
“Thanks,” you respond, finding it easier to breathe.
“Why were you crying so much?” Ellie asks, addressing her original observation.
“Just depressed and lonely and stuff. I don’t have friends in my hometown, not like you.”
“You’ll always have me,” she says. “I mean it.”
“I’d hope so, soulmate,” you laugh off the seriousness of the conversation, and she sighs, looking to your eyes with her own soulful ones.
“I’m glad it’s you,” she tells you.  “I don’t think I’d be able to stand anyone else.”
“Yeah, right!” you huff out a laugh, confused at her sudden emotional openness. Sure, she was more honest about her feelings with you than anyone else, but that didn’t mean that she was a completely open book. Who was?
“You’re not disappointed, are you?” Ellie wonders because of your remark.
“God, no! I- I actually have a really big crush on you,” you admit.
“Yeah?” she asks, the cutest little grin on her face, you know the one. “I have a crush on you, too.”
You blush again.
“Sorry… I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable, I’m not very good at flirting or anything like that. I don’t really care about much of anyone at all, and you’re definitely the only person I’ve really cared about in a romantic way, so…”
“No, it’s not that! I- You- You being really good at flirting is what’s got me like this. And the fact that I’m a dork who’s really bad at flirting contributes,” you explain.
“I am? Good at flirting, I mean.”
“Well, with me, at least,” you tell her.
“Um… Sorry if it’s lame to ask, but… Can I kiss you?”
“Of course! And it’s not lame to ask at all, El, I appreciate it actua- Mmf!”
You could live forever in the feeling of her lips on yours, her hands oh-so carefully holding your cheeks.
“Sorry,” she shyly says, as she slowly pulls away from you, looking in your eyes. “I’ve just been wanting to do that for a really, really long time. Pretty much since we met, actually.”
“R-really?” you ask, a bit breathless and definitely still flustered.
“Yeah, you’re perfect. In, like, every way. It’s the worst and the best.”
“I’m perfect?! But you’re- You’re you!” you argue, and she shakes her head, rolling her eyes. “I’m so lucky.”
“No, I’m the lucky one,” she disagrees.
“We can both be lucky,” you tell her, and she sighs.
“I suppose that’s a good compromise,” she decides. “So, what should we do before dinner? We’ve got a couple hours to kill, but I don’t think either of us has much more to say that wouldn’t be repetitive or… Something.” She blushes again, cheeks bright pink.
You blush back, reminded that she knew all about you and the things you did to yourself behind doors. “R-right,” you reply. Hey, you may be a horny motherfucker, but that doesn’t make you any less of a bottom.
“Can I see?” she asks, touching at your scarf. You nod, and she unwraps the scarf. She carefully touches the spotted bruises with her fingers. “With the belt you’re wearing?”
You can’t even speak. You nod, and the ghost of a smile graces her face before she just barely presses her lips to the bruises closest to her, on the side of your neck. Your hand quickly grabs her bicep tightly, and she stops, looking to you with concern.
“I’m so sorry, I got a bit carried aw-”
“No, no, it’s good, I’m just… Sensitive there,” you admit, and one of the biggest smiles you’ve seen her wear is on her lips.
“Yeah?” she asks, taking her crossbody bag off of her shoulder and opening it. She takes out a bottle of Antifel pills. “How sensitive?”
“Oh God, um… I- Um…” Your nerves are really getting to you, and your breathing gets heavier as you stare at the bottle. This is really happening. It’s really happening. You’d always wanted to, especially with her, but now that it’s a reality, you feel on the brink.
Ellie can recognize that look in your eyes, and it’s a look she’d hoped she’d never be the cause of.
“Shit, Y/N. What’s going on? Talk to me.”
“I- Um, I just- I want to? But I- I just- I don’t know, it’s just getting really hard to breathe, and uh, not in a hot way,” you joke nervously.
“Hey, you can want to and not be ready to right this minute. We haven’t even been on a date yet, okay? I’m really sorry if I made you feel like you had to do anything you didn’t want to,” Ellie tells you, and she feels immensely guilty either way.
“No! I liked you kissing me, especially where you did, but, you’re right. We should probably adjust to the news and put a label on whatever this is before we do anything too serious.”
Ellie nods. “You always were the more logical one. I’ll put these in the medicine cabinet and we can just… Talk about stuff, like we always do.”
“But with more kissing and cuddling, I hope?” you request, and she nods, going to put the bottle away before returning to find you bundled up in her comforter. “It’s so cozy…” you practically sing, at least to her.
“This is a dream,” she sighs happily, slipping off her shoes and joining you in her bed. You spoon her side, and she hums in content, stroking your hair.
“You’re in a good mood,” you comment. Ellie is not a very cheerful person, at least not openly. So, to see her like this was surprising.
“Yeah, of course I am. It’s you. It’s really you. I’ve never been happier in my life,” she says, having really been hit with the fact that you’re her soulmate. All hers. “All mine…” she hums.
“You really know how to make a girl feel special… I mean it. I’m really not all that.”
“Please be my girlfriend,” she requests.
“Only if you’ll be mine,” you reply, and she scoffs.
“I think that’s how that works, babe.”
Your heart skips a beat and you stare at her in wonder.
“Sorry for not asking if pet names were okay…It’s just something I like, it’s really stupid.”
“No, I really like it, hence the dumb stare and the lack of breathing.”
She chuckles, holding you tighter. You smile with her, glad that she’s happy.
“I hope you don’t feel like you have to over-exaggerate how happy you are. It’s okay if you’re not ridiculously happy about finding your soulmate.”
“Oh, no, I’m as happy as I sound. I’m, uh, definitely a textbook case of Lesbian That’s A Grumpy Bitch Til She Gets A Girlfriend. But then again, I’ll probably just be a significantly less grumpy bitch to everyone but you, sorry.”
“I don’t mind, I like you being your bitchy self,” you reply, being rewarded with a kiss placed atop your head that sends tingles dancing down your body. “Mm… I like that.”
“Good,” Ellie responds. “I’m glad.”
“I’m gladder,” you tease.
“I’m gladdest...”
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ssj4 · 5 years
Note
Sorry to bother you, but I keep seeing posts about a future Goten AU and I keep getting really curious! However, when I try to find links to anything about it I end up at some abandoned URLs.
SECOND TIME TRYING TO ANSWER THIS CAUSE MY IDIOT ASS FORGOT I HAD ONE TYPED OUT AND CLOSED EVERYTHING :)
some disclaimers im getting most of this from an old draft i had written about the au, i havent watched the specific scenes in dbz and dbs that these are based on in well over 2+ years so i dont remember the timeline of events that well so im sorry if some of it just straight up doesnt make sense lol
this whole thing did start out as an excuse to replace the romantic scenes with mai in dbs with goten actually so the truten themes are pretty significant but that aside future goten is a very good boy with a much different personality and outlook on things… much like how future trunks is compared to his main timeline counterpart :3c the whole thing was developed by me and my gf together and we never rly posted too much about it and the broken links you did end up finding were probably from like the one or two times we did but here u go im glad u asked 
I HOPE THE READ MORE LINK WORKS ON MOBILE IF NOT IM SORRY
the big change is it starts out with chi chi getting pregnant before goku dies of heart disease or whatever in the android saga instead of the cell saga, so even after he dies in that timeline she still has their 2nd son and he grows up in the future timeline with trunks.
when they were kids (like 10-15) goten was stronger than trunks just bc gohan and chi chi were there to teach him just a little bit. trunks and goten sparred a lot though so he was able to keep up but never really passed him. (that part isnt really important but i figured it was a nice detail that made sense)
thats when history of trunks comes into play, and they both get really serious about gohan training them. the scene in the movie where gohan knocks trunks out before flying off and getting killed is the same except now he just knocks out 2 kids instead of 1 i guess. 
i feel i gotta add that this au was created when the future trunks arc in dbs was airing, and mai was introduced as his love interest, and honestly in my opinion the scenes were written really well but i just wasnt digging the fact that before she was granted a younger appearance she was already middle aged, like she was old enough to be his mom if that makes sense. so it really isnt a dig on mai at all cause i love her and id die for her its just the romantic plot that i didnt like. so when that was airing i thought “WELL what if that was someone else” 
she’s still with them though in this timeline and she still has her younger appearance! 
the future timeline is still progressing the same as it did in canon, the androids still wrecked the place and no one was strong enough to do much about it so trunks is still set up with a time machine to meet with the other timeline. goten stays back and does his best to protect everyone while hes gone just in case
some stuff happens in between here but skip ahead to trunks coming back from the trip after the cell games i guess! lots of stuff happened obviously like trunks literally dying, spending years in the time chamber with his dad, meeting a whole gaggle of clowns that he’d only heard stories about, seeing gohan as a preteen. hes got a lot of stuff to share!!! now hes back and he can take care of the androids + cell + and goten can catch up and lifes pretty good over there! 😇
during the rebuilding period goten would spend a lot of time with chi-chi and ox-king and still slept over there occasionally which she really appreciated, and he invited trunks and bulma over there with him frequently.
despite this he wasnt present when she died as no one really expected goku black to wipe out the landscape so far from the city, but she and ox-king died along with more than half of the population. (ugh god im so sorry queen i love you😓)
as i said before mai is still here and she’s still the leader of the resistance!
events of future bulmas death is the same as well as mai originally intending to go with trunks when they meet up together in an abandoned building. goten is already there as the three of them rest up a bit and start making their way to capsule corp. goten was planning on staying behind anyways but he wanted to see the two of them off. when goku black interrupts them as they arrive, trunks and goten encourage mai to escape, seeing as she only has a gun and everyone already knows bullets arent gonna work. 
this scene is the same as it was in canon, where trunks tries to rush black but gets beaten quickly. mai trying to buy him time to let him escape is replaced with goten actually fighting him and taking a hit for trunks but getting knocked out as mai did. trunks under extreme stress from already losing his mom today assumes hes dead instantly, (he has dumb bitch disease, he didnt even check for a pulse in canon!🤔) and fires a masenko to escape into capsule on his own 
after trunks pops back in time and black is focused on searching for him, mai sneaks back in to retrieve goten (even though they told her to leave she really just ducked behind some rubble and stayed close, because she wasnt just gonna leave them!)
she takes him back to an underground bunker with other members of earths resistance and when he wakes up she tells him that trunks made it to the time machine and that hes presumably in the other timeline now. 
idk if yall remember it well but i rewatched some of the episodes just for this, and trunks in the main timeline believing goten was killed and mai is alone and he wont be able to get back is so sad. and when he spent that day with gohan and his family and cried thinking about how if black hadn’t have shown up, he couldve had a family too… he doesnt deserve to be this sad 😥
skip to when he’s finally able to get back home with goku and vegeta with him and they make their way to the bunker where he sees mai and goten together! the scene in canon where he rushes over and starts spilling his heart out is the same, with him telling goten he thought he died
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they get a really sweet hug moment here when theyre both happy to see the other is still safe and it gives both goku and vegeta some Food For Thought, because goku actually didnt know there was a goten in this timeline, and he doesnt really recognize him at first. vegeta has the idea in his head that this is probably goten.
goten never really had any sort of real attachment to his dad. it makes sense hes never met him, hes only ever really heard about him through others, (his mom, his brother, trunks, and probably bulma has mentioned him as well) so he definitely knows OF him its just that, he doesnt know him. so when he sees the real goku standing there for once a lot of thoughts run though his mind, like, “that looks A LOT like goku black!” “thats definitely my old hairstyle” and “holy shit is that my dad?” but the first thing he actually says out loud is “Holy shit its goku orange” and vegeta really almost loses it because cause any doubt in his mind about this kid being related to kakarot just went right out the window cause only someone related to him would say that
and as you probably know a lot happens after that with them all finding a way to defeat zamasu but i dont want to include all of the rest when you can probably just interpret which scenes were changed  
ANYWAYS now instead of trunks surviving the apocalypse its trunks and goten surviving the apocalypse. thats why its not a really super romantic deal like Who has time for dates when goku black Might possibly be hiding in this abandoned olive garden?? so theyre just very close and privately affectionate
the ending where trunks and mai get to live in a new world with their counterparts is the same except gotens there with them of course, dbs left their ending pretty open 
so that takes care of the story changes, heres some additional details and information on gotens character in this au! 
heres his design, drawn by my girlfriend @ssj2 uwu !! 
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he kept his natural hairstyle for a while, but i think he changed it sometime during the rebuilding period after the androids and just let it grow out a bunch. up until then he kept his natural style purely to honor the guy he’s heard so fondly of even if it brought him a lot of mixed feelings when people said he looks just like him. a really distinct feature about his new hairstyle is that the spikes look like horns and i love that a lot !!
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and the shawl he wears was the same one chi chi wore 
some personality traits for future goten is that he has a habit of bottling up his negative emotions and has trouble taking care of himself, as hes always more focused on the well being of his loved ones. he can be mischievous and cocky but hes not overconfident (or he hasnt been since gohans death) however in some situations he can be charismatic and assertive which works really well imowhen their timeline is erased and theyre temporarily in the main timeline, goten gets to meet a bunch of people like gohan and his family, chi chi, and even his counterpart 
sorry if this post was messy i wasnt really sure how i wanted to make it look and im kinda bad at dumping information out so if any of its confusing just redirect me to it and ill try again gdjfksjdgsfk 😭❤
hmmm anyways thank u for reading!! its an au we made years ago and we love a lot and i hope u do too! be nice pls!! and send asks about it if you’d like cause its fun to think about! 
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Text
Takara’s Hero Academia, Season 2 Episode 2 [Eijiro Kirishima/OC] [Female!Aizawa/Hizashi]
Okay, so here we finally are. I feel like it’s been forever since I updated this story. Sorry! 
Anyway, um, I do now have a Patreon, in case anyone wants to actually pay me to write or whatever. Seriously, though, don’t feel pressured to do anything with this. I am just seeing if anything will come out of this. 
Moving on, I’ll do the taglist. @elite-guard-hardygal @dailyojiromashirao @souskena and @fandoms-fandoms-everywhere99 . I apologize for not having this up last night!! I thought I’d be able to sit down and get it done but then I ended up getting sidetracked and then it was midnight and--whoops. I might post what I did instead later. It’s kinda cool! Hardygal knows what it is, lol. XD
Okay, so lemme add the link for this series’ Masterlist! 
Okay, now let’s get to the story! :)
God Bless and Good Day! 
~The Lupine Sojourner
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By the time the final bell rang, I was exhausted.
I yawn and stand, gathering my things up before Eijiro grabs them and slips them into my backpack for me, and I blush a little. He was still distracting me! I thought I was going to try to pull myself together around him! Regardless, I smile.
“Thanks, but you really don’t have to keep doing this kind of thing for me…” I mumble, scratching the back of my neck. Eijiro shrugs.
“I want to.” He replies and my blush goes a few shades darker.
“O-oh…” I mumble. “Okay.” Then, Ochaco opens the door.
“Uhh...why the heck are you all here!?” I look up and see the doorway packed with students.
“Do you students have some business with our class?” Tenya asks. No one replies. I shift awkwardly, shrinking back a little into my seat. The spotlight wasn’t something I was used to. If I had to guess, they’re here to scout out the class that’s fought villains...greeeaaaattt.
“Why are you blocking the doorway?” The class pervert asks. “I won’t let you hold us hostage!” I roll my eyes. Like he could do anything about it. Katsuki, backpack over his shoulder, stalks toward the door.
“They’re scouting out the competition, idiots.” He growls. “We’re the class that survived a real villain attack. They wanna see us with their own eyes.” I gulp, standing. If he was leaving, I should, too. I needed to find Mom and Dad, anyway. Eijiro takes my backpack and walks toward the door with me. I smile gratefully at him. “At least know you know what a future pro looks like.” Katsuki continued. I roll my eyes, the smile dropping.
“Katsuki, enough. We’re all striving to be heroes. Technically, that makes us all potential future pros. Stop.” I call, but it doesn’t make a difference.
“Now move it, extras!” Katsuki snaps as the crowd goes quiet.
“Katsuki!” I bark, hobbling over.
“You can’t just go around calling people extras just because you don’t know them!” Tenya interjects, his arms waving wildly in his emotional state. I open my mouth to add my own lecture, but then a voice rings out and I freeze.
“So this is Class 1-A.” It was Hitoshi! “I heard you guys were impressive, but you just seem like an ass.” He was talking to Katsuki as he made his way through the crowd as I crutch over.
“Shinso!” He never liked me calling him ‘Hitoshi’ in public. He smiles briefly at me, nodding subtly, then turns back to Katsuki.
“You know this clown?” Katsuki growls. I glare at him.
“Yeah. We went to middle school together.” It was a reason I know his name, at least. I didn’t need to go further and embarrass Hitoshi.
“I was sad to come here and find a bunch of egomaniacs in her class.” He continues, sighing a little and rubbing the back of his neck.
“It’s just how Katsuki is,” I defend, “but seriously. Not all of us are like him.” Katsuki glares at me. Hitoshi closes his eyes.
“I wanted to be in the hero course.” He says to no one in particular...or maybe Katsuki. Or 1-A. I’m not sure. “But, like many others here, I was forced to choose a different track.” I suddenly realize why Shinso was here; part of it might be checking on me, but a larger portion must be him declaring what he intended to do. He wanted to win the Sports Festival or do well enough that he can be moved into the Hero Course, like Mom did when she was in high school. “Such is life.” His eyes narrow at Katsuki, who’s remaining surprisingly calm. “I didn’t cut it the first time around, but I have another chance.” I knew it! “If any of us do well in the Sports Festival, the teachers can decide to transfer us to the Hero Course, and they’ll have to transfer students out to make room.” Oh, no...this was a declaration of war. “‘Scouting the competition’?” Hitoshi asks rhetorically. “Maybe some of my peers are, but I’m here to let you know that if you don’t bring your very best, I’ll steal your spot right out from under you.” Hitoshi tilts his head a little. “Consider this a declaration of war.” I blink.
“Shinso…” I murmur, biting my lip. The rest of the class flinches in shock, but I look at Shinso dead in the eye. Hitoshi was serious, but only glaring at Katsuki, who was glaring back. Was he just acting tough to push himself?
“Hey, you!” Comes a new male voice, and someone else forces their way to the head of the crowd. He had incredibly thick blonde eyelash-looking things around his eyes, with silver hair and a fire in his eyes to match Katsuki’s. Oh, great. Another hothead. “I’m from Class B, right next door to you! We heard you fought some villains and- -oh, shit.” He stops short when he sees my boot and crutch. I sigh and gesture to the boot.
“Yeah, we fought villains.” I reply. “And I got the injuries to prove it.” He takes a step back, then scoffs.
“Well, looks like the rest of your class are brats who think they’re better than us!” He challenges. I roll my eyes and point to my backpack, in Eijiro’s hand.
“That’s my backpack, but it hasn’t been on my shoulders since I got here. Eijiro here was the one who got me out of the villain attack and he’s been helping me ever since. The rest of my class are great people, too. Bakugo’s just...headstrong and doesn’t listen to anything or anyone.” The guy turns to Katsuki.
“Oh, great! Talk all you want, loser! It’ll just be more embarrassing when you’re K.Oed!” Katsuki just scoffs and walks away.
“Don’t you ignore me!” The newcomer roars angrily. I move to get Katsuki, but Eijiro beats me to saying anything.
“Dude, where’re you going?! You gotta say something! It’s your fault everyone’s hating on us, Bakugo!” Katuski just glances over his shoulder.
“These people don’t matter.” He growls.
“Huh!?” Eijiro snaps.
“The only thing that’s important is that I beat them.”
“Katsuki, stop!” I snap. “Yeah, we have to beat them to win, but heroes also need to have good teamwork with others. You need to work on that if you want to be the top.”
“Says who?” Katsuki retorts, then walks away before I can say anything else. The silver-head pops up again.
“Hey! I’m coming for you!” He exclaims. Katsuki ignores him. I go to chase him down and talk sense into him, but then decide against it. Right now, Katsuki’s only focus was winning the Sports Festival. If I were to talk to him, he’d only see it as me trying to undermine his chances somehow.
“I hate that that was such a manly exit…” Eijiro grumbles, clenching his fist. I bite my lip.
“Yeah, but...there’s no way he’ll win the Festival if he pisses everyone off.” I reply.
“Meh. He’ll be fine.” Sero counters.
“Besides, he wasn’t wrong.” Fumikage points out. “We have to beat them.” Kaminari groans.
“Yeah, sure, but this sucks!”
“So let’s prove them wrong.” I call, coming back further into the class room. “Don’t be what everyone thinks we are. We’ll prove them wrong.” Denki groans.
“But he made us everyone’s enemy!”
“Yeah, and all these dumb idiots will be gunning for us in the Festical now.” Mineta adds. I shrug, not looking at that little creep.
“Look, just keep training hard and don’t be an asshole and we’ll prove them wrong.” I retort, looking at Kaminari. He laughs.
“Kinda blunt, Yamada, but I like your style!” I chuckle and wave him away.
“Call me Takara, and thanks.” Eijiro then calls me and puts my backpack beside my desk for me. I notice he’s glaring at Kaminari, so I try to distract him by smiling at him. “Thanks.” The students outside slowly go away, talking about this and that, and I have to restrain myself from giving some big speech about how great my class is because the truth is...I don’t really know them yet. I don’t know enough to definitively stand up and say what I want to say. I then look up as Shinso walks over, giving me a small smile.
“Hey.” I smile back.
“Hey.”
“I’m glad to see you’re better. You had me scared for a moment.” Anyone who didn’t know Shinso might think he’s just saying that. His voice didn’t give much emotion away, but I understood. He meant every word.
“That was some speech.” I note, sighing.
“I meant that, too.” He says, leaning against the desk in front of me and crossing his arms. Most everyone’s left and I wanted to talk to Shinso, anyway, so I stay.
“Don’t lie; you just wanted to see me.” I tease, smiling.
“And what gave you that idea? I just wanted to send my message to 1-A.” He retorts. I roll my eyes, then sigh and pick at my skirt.
“...I’m worried, Shinso.” I confess softly.
“About what?” He asks, brow raised.
“About the Festival, and...and if I’ll be healed enough to prepare myself to fight. I just...my ribs don’t hurt that bad, but my leg still needs work. And I still need to train. A lot. I just...Mom and Dad will be watching. The world will be watching. I want to make a good impression.” Eijiro apparently takes that as a kind of cue, wrapping an arm around my shoulder.
“You’ll make a great one!” He assures me, daring to squeeze me close enough to mush our cheeks together. I blush and laugh.
“If you say so.” I reply, squeezing him in return. He straightens up, lets go, and puts a hand on my shoulder.
“But seriously; don’t sweat it. You’ll be great!” I grin and put my hand over his in a moment of boldness. 
“If you say so.” I retort. Eijiro understood the deeper meaning; I support you, but think you’re downplaying yourself too much.. It was somethign we’d done for each other a lot as we approached this school year and the challenge of learning how to be a pro hero. Shinso pushes off the desk.
“Well, it was nice chatting, but I should be going.” He says. I stand, too, and hug him.
“Thanks for coming.” I murmur, drawing away.
“Your friend’s right, Takara; trust yourself. Besides, your parents adore you. No matter what you do in the Festival, their love won’t change.” I nod.
“Yeah, yeah. I just can’t help worrying about this whole thing.” Hitoshi shakes his head, chuckling.
“Don’t.” With that, he shrugs and waves as he walks away. I watch him leave and then pick up my backpack, slinging it over one shoulder, insisting on carrying it this time, despite Eijiro tugging on it.
“I got it. I’m not going far. Just to the teacher’s lounge to find Mom and Dad.” Eijiro pouts.
“Takara, you shouldn’t overdo it.” He mumbles. I smile, adjusting the backpack a little.
“I’m not.” He suddenly leans forward gives me a hug. I wonder where this is coming from, but find that I really like this. His hug is strong, but not overwhelming, steady and warm. I feel so safe and secure, I lose myself for a second and bury my face in his neck. He smells like cologne and men’s bodywash. One of those two things had teatree oil in it, something that made him smell amazing!
I then feel Eijiro stiffen and come back to reality and I blush almost blood red as I release him. Our eyes were so wide, they might have popped if they were balloons. “S-so-sorry!” I stammer, grabbing my crutch and running as quick as I can out of the classroom without using the crutch. Eijiro hadn’t moved, so I had a headstart, managing to get away before he- -”Ow!”
“Oof!” I blink, my leg flaring a bit as I realize I’ve run into somebody. Instantly, I stand and apologize. The person I hit laughs.
“Hey, don’t worry about it. It happens sometimes.” It’s a female, third year if I had to guess. Her Quirk makes her look wolf-like, her fur a mottled grey, black and earthen brown. It was so pretty! Her eyes were sapphire blue on the outside and emerald green on the inside and her tail flicks back and forth mindlessly and I have to remember to talk. It was rude to just stare.
“But still. I’m, um, Takara. Takara Yamada.” Her eyes light up.
“Oh! My dad works with your parents!” I raise a brow.
“Really?” She nods.
“Yeah! Oh, sorry! I’m Asami. Asami Hamato.” I grin.
“Like Hamato-Sensei that teaches the second years’ literature?” Asami laughs.
“Yeah. He might quit after this semester, though. He wants to start a self-defense dojo for people with less, um, combative Quirks.”
“Wow, that’s amazing!” She nods happily.
“Thanks.” She hands me back my crutch. “Here you go.” I take it. She pauses. “Wait...you’re in 1-A, right?” I nod.
“Yeah.” She gestures to my boot.
“This from that USJ incident?” I nod.
“Yeah...turns out your leg breaks when a superhuman grabs it to slam you into your mother.” I tried to sound light, like it was a joke now...but my voice wavered. Asami winces.
“Yikes. I’m glad you’re doing better, then.” I was grateful she didn’t press me for more details as I squirm.
“Thanks. I should probably let you go. It was great meeting you.” Asami smiles.
“Yeah, it was great meeting you, too. Maybe I’ll see you around, okay?” I nod, starting to walk off.
“Yeah.” We wave at each other and I continue on my way. Luckily, Eijiro hadn’t pursued me. I blushed again just thinking about that moment…
What was I thinking?! I’d just...it’d felt so good having his strong arms around me, his warmth making me feel safe and at ease, even if it was just for a moment. And then I went and ruined the mood by sniffing him! Ergh!
Finally, I reach the teacher’s lounge. “Hey, champ!” Dad calls. “I was just gonna come looking for yah!” I walk further into the room.
“Hey. I was just talking a bit with the others before I came up here.” he smiles.
“Okay.” I decided to focus on Asami, not that. I’d never hear the end of it if I told Dad I sniffed someone (especially Eijiro) out of nowhere.
“I met a third year on my way here.” Dad tilts his head.
“Oh? Who are they? I might know her.”
“Asami Hamato.” Dad grins.
“Oh, yeah! Her dad works here; Hamato Yoshi. He’s a nice guy. Kinda quiet, doesn’t say much, and doesn’t hang around the school a lot.” I shrug.
“Asami also said he wants to start a self-defense dojo for people that don’t have very combative Quirks.” Dad’s eyes go wide.
“That’s great!” I grin.
“I know, right?” Dad then grabs his stuff.
“Alright. Shota’s resting on the couch, but it’s time to go, so I’ll get her.” I nod.
=#=#=#=#=
The next few days went quick, and after school, I’d pop in for a little healing. Never anything extreme, but enough that in those few days, I was healed enough that Recovery Girl gave me the okay to start getting back into exercise and training, warning me to take it a little slow at first.
At that particular session (when I was cleared for training), All Might happens by the door. “I didn’t know you still needed healing…” He mumbles, walking slowly into the room. He looked guilty, but I don’t know why.
“Well, I didn’t want to drain my stamina too much because of school and stuff, but, um, yeah...I should be all healed soon, though, right Recovery Girl?” She chuckles.
“Yes, I believe so, now hold still so I can use my Quirk.” I do and find the healing sensation something I’ve gotten used to at this point. I watch Toshin-Oji go into his real form and sigh heavily as he sits on a cot.
“Takara, I...I wanted to say I’m sorry.” I blink as Recovery Girl moves away.
“Wait, what?” I ask, genuinely confused. “What for?”
“I couldn’t be at the USJ because I wasted my time as All Might that morning being heroic. I was stupid and now you, Shota, and Izuku paid the price.” I blink, remembering that Izuku’s legs seemed broken when he leapt out to protect All Might at the USJ. I wince.
“Is Izuku okay?” I ask automatically.
“He’s fine.” Recovery Girl assures me. “Besides broken legs, he only had minor injuries and two broken fingers.” I breathe out.
“That’s good.”
“How’s Shota?” All Might asks, bringing us more or less back to what he’d said. I sigh.
“She’s...coping. It’s not easy for her to adjust to needing to wear casts on both of her arms, but she’s happy she’s not blind.”
“She could have been blinded?!” He asks sharply in shock. I pale. Wrong thing to say!
“...Her orbital floors were pretty badly damaged, but Recovery Girl managed to heal them. She’s fine...or, at least, better then she used to be.” I chuckle awkwardly, and All Might smiles in relief, exhaling.
“That’s great news. Frankly, I was worried about you two, even after I heard you were stable. When I saw you on the ground, caught under Nomu’s foot...I didn’t know what had happened, just that it pissed me off so much I saw red and next thing I knew, I had you in my arms.” I blink. He’d been feeling this way since the incident?
“Toshin-Oji, you really can’t blame yourself- -no, seriously- -the only ones to blame are the villains.” I reply, holding up a hand when he tried to interrupt. “Even during the fight, I knew as long as I could hold out until I got to Recovery Girl, I’d be okay. I knew my injuries were bad, but I always had that notion in the back of my head.” I realize what I’m saying and turn to Recovery Girl. “I mean, not that I assumed you’d help me or anything! I just knew there was a possibility that I’d be healed pretty quickly!” She holds up her hand.
“I knew what you meant, dear. And, unlike another student, I haven’t had to heal you much, so of course I’d help you out. You and your mother were hurt pretty bad. I knew I could help, and I did, so let���s all agree to put this behind us, okay?” I smile.
“Yeah...okay. Toshin-Oji?” He turns his head to look me in the eye. “I love you.” He blinks.
“I love you, too.” He says and I swoop over to hug him. “You truly are a treasure.” He murmurs, squeezing me just a little harder and kissing my temple. I tear up a little in happiness and bury my face in his chest.
“Hey, Tik--...am I interrupting?” Dad asks, trailing off when he saw what was going on. I pull away and smile at Dad.
“Nah, we were just clearing some things up.” I reply, winking at Toshin-Oji. Dad seems to read the subtext and nods.
“I see. Well, Shota’s ready to go, so let’s not keep her waiting, okay?” I nod.
“Okay.” I turn back to the office. “Bye, guys!” I call, waving as I walk out of the room, thankfully not needing my boot. “Thank you, Recovery Girl!” I add.
“Don’t overdo it, dear! Start slow!” She calls back and I nod in acknowledgement.
“Hey, Tik-Tak, there’s actually something I wanted to talk to you about.” Dad says as we walk, and I nod, wondering what he could possibly want to talk to me about.
“Okay.” I prompt. He wraps an arm around my shoulders.
“Shota and I have been talking, and we think it’d be best to move into the faculty facility here on campus. That way, Shota doesn’t have to be driven to work everyday and we all have a bit more independence. Would you want to do that?” I nod.
“Yeah, Mom mentioned you two were toying with the idea, and I told her I could have my stuff packed in, like, two hours. Honestly, I think it’s a good idea!” He ruffles my hair.
“Thanks, Takara. Frankly, I’m using the whole move as a way to help Shota.” He sighs, slumped and looking away. “She’s taking this hard. Villains got the drop on us and she’s still trying to cope.” I blink.
“I...I’d imagine so.” I mumble. “Honestly, I haven’t been sleeping too well, myself. I keep waking up to nothing, feeling on edge for some reason, wondering what woke me, but I’m able to go back to sleep. Sometimes, I swear there’s someone in a room, but when I do the vibration thing, no one’s there.” Dad looks at me somberly, hand on my shoulder.
“That’s completely normal, Musume. Even Shota’s been having nightmares. She keeps waking up, clutching her face and staring around the room with her Quirk active, like she’s looking for enemies. It’s hard to get her to calm down.” I sigh. Figures Mom has her own demons to deal with.
“Maybe we can have movie night? Watch some corny comedy or something?” Dad chuckles.
“Maybe. Or we can ask Toshinori for show suggestions to watch as a family.” I nod eagerly.
“Yeah!” I’m already whipping out my phone and typing up a text as Dad laughs.
“We’ll look up recipes for popcorn and make a night of it. What’dya say?” I grin at him, sending the text.
“I say ‘hell yeah’!” I reply, high-fiving dad. This was a great idea!
Within five minutes, I get a text back.
Toshin-Oji <3:
Well, if you’re looking for something that makes for a good distraction, I’d recommend some of the older movies by an American film studio called Walt Disney. They have an interesting 2-D style in their early works and I find the stories charming. As for shows, I’m not sure...maybe look around and see if something appeals to you all.
I smile. That was an interesting idea, for sure.
=#=#=#=#=
The next day, we were at the fake city from the entrance exam, training. It was a lot of fun, even if I couldn’t really work myself the way I wanted to without making my leg cramp and spasm even after healing the broken bone. It was slowly coming back to normal, though, as I practiced simple kicks and stuff after a really short run to build that muscle back. My ribs forced me to take breaks, as well, if I pushed it too hard, but they were coming along great, too. My phone buzzes as I finish a pretend fight, so I check who the text is from.
Eijiro Kirishima:
Hey, come look at the tall building’s roof!
Confused, I decide to go ahead and walk over. I knew Eijiro was in the same area as me, so I knew which tall building he meant. However, it was so tall, I couldn’t see clearly what I was supposed to see up there. All I saw was a small blurry thing that might be Eijiro.
Me:
Ok, I’m here. What do you want me to see? I can’t really see anything…
Just a few seconds after I sent that, I hear a faint yell and then look up to see- - “Eijiro!” I scream, backing up toward the building make sure I wouldn’t be hit. I knew what he was doing; practicing falling long distances and using his Quirk to survive them. It was just training, but...still. If he didn’t activate his Quirk in time...thankfully, he lands and comes back up almost instantly, thrusting dramatically through the cracked pavement.
“Yyyeeaaahhh!” He roars, grinning wildly at me as he walks over, dusting himself off. His grin then turns into a smirk. “Impressed?” He asks, one hand on his hip, the other on the wall. I snort, blushing a little as he leans in just a little.
“You’re insane. You could have died...but to answer your question...yeah, it was kinda impressive.” I reply with slightly pink cheeks, chuckling and walking away, when Eijiro puts his other hand on the other side of my head. I turn to look at him. His face is intense with some unreadable emotion as he stares at me.
“So...did I smell good?” He asks, leaning in. I blush and lean back against the wall. Where was this coming from!?
“Um...what?” I ask stupidly, my racing mind unable to process what he might be talking about.
“What happened after the final bell yesterday...that hug…” My blush darkens. Oh shit! I’d almost forgotten! I lick my lips.
“I- -I’m so sorry about that!” I squeak, unsure how to take this reaction. Was he mad? Disgusted? He was so hard to read right now… “I, ah, I mean…yeah...you did smell good.” Why was that hard to say? It was a fact, nothing more...right? He then smiles, laughing (I swear he’s blushing, too, though) as he leans back, keeping one hand on the wall. I blush darker and want to sink into the ground.
“Takara, relax! I was just teasing!” He chirps. “But, good to know!” I exhale, then smack his arm.
“You jerk! I thought you were mad at me or something!” That, and I thought maybe...that was leading somewhere- -stoppit! This is not the time for those kind of thoughts! He’s just a friend! Stop!
“Aww, Takara, I could never be mad at you for long!” He replies, patting my arm and moving away.
“Good to know, jerk.” I grumble, the tone undermined by my smirk, then I sigh and nudge him. “You know, you’re a good man, Eijiro.” I mumble, cheeks red again “You didn’t have to help me, but you did, and I want you to know it means a lot to me.” He’s definitely blushing as he walks beside me. I wanted to make sure he knew how much all his help meant to me.
“Takara, I’d do it again. Anytime.” I feel an instinct to hug him but refrain and settle for smiling at him as we walk back toward where the others were training.
“And I’d do it for you.” I reply, just letting myself enjoy this moment. It was two friends affirming their bond...and that’s it…
So why am I blushing?!
(I promise I don’t mean to keep forcing KiriKara down your throat but most of these moments write themselves. Hope y’all don’t mind! (: Can’t wait to show you all the Sports Festival!)
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ruffiorocks · 5 years
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Lena Luthor is justified keeping some Harun El and here is why! (Long post, but important)
Sooo i’ve been thinking about how Lena kept some Harun El, and if/when Supergirl finds out she kept some she will no doubt be pissed and probably jump down the ‘Lena you are bad’ route once more. Like she is want to do when the whole world doesn't inform her when they are intending to sneeze!
So the gang need some Harun El (black kryptonite) to fight and defeat Reign. Winn and Lena discover some on a meteor and Kara and Mon El travel to retrieve it. 
They discover that the meteor is actual the remains of Argo City and Kara discovers her mother is still alive. 
Alura informs Kara that Argo City is being powered by what little Harun El they have,it protects them and sustains life there all thanks to Kara’s father. 
Alura gets Kara an audience with the High Council so she can ask them to give her some Harun El to help with the Reign issue. This is Kara’s speech, pay attention because the wording will be important! 
“There are people on Earth who work every day to solve the mistakes of Krypton's past. People who are trying to make Earth fairer. Or just better. These people dedicate their lives to this work, and some have even given their lives to it. This planet, these... these people, they took me in. An alien immigrant from a world they knew nothing about. A world whose legacy threatened their way of life, and their safety, again and again and again. And now they deserve it in kind, because their very existence is threatened by this Worldkiller of Kryptonian making. My mother tells me Argo City has changed, that it has learned from the mistakes of Krypton's past. So I beg you. Give us the gift of Harun-El. We don't need very much. And this bit of charity, it will save Earth.’
So, Kara is giving a whole speech on why she needs the Harun El, she even lists why its important. But im going to assume the ‘people’ she is referring to include herself and the DEO. BUT do you know who else these statements refer to? Even if that wasn't what Kara meant? LENA! 
‘People who are trying to make Earth fairer or just better’ - Lena spends her life doing this! Lena will later talk about leveling the playing field, protecting people etc.Curing cancer and other things. Remember when she made that portal with Rhea? All she saw was a way to help people, to get emergency food and medicine to third world countries etc. 
‘A world whose legacy threatened their way of life, and their safety, again and again and again. And now they deserve it in kind, because their very existence is threatened by this Worldkiller of Kryptonian making’ - Kara is acknowledging here that Kryptonians have attacked several times, but also other aliens have to. Here Kara is actually justifying why Lena will later want to give people Superpowers, why she most likely is going to take the government contract. Kara is at Argo city begging for help because SHE alone can’t defend the planet from Reign. She is in need of help to do it. This is just proof that Kara and the rest of the DEO/Legion simply arent enough to defend Earth. A fact that Lena probably sees to, since she is called in enough to come and help when the DEO are dumb founded and lost! 
‘Give us the gift of Harun-El. We don't need very much. And this bit of charity, it will save Earth.’ - Here Kara is talking about the Reign issue obviously, BUT these words also fit why Lena decided to keep some. To first off cure cancer and other ailments, but then to help humans stand up to aliens. The latter part was an accident Lena didn't originally plan, it was something she discovered. 
Now, this is the response Kara gets at first, but then you know she gets some:
Jul-Us : ‘Well said, Kara Zor-El. But my concern is for those of us you left behind. I'm afraid we cannot spare the Harun-El’.
I find this statement to be very noteworthy! ‘we cannot spare the Harun El’ so that means (as we all know anyway) that Argo only has a small amount. That means that the Kryptonians haven't discovered a way to recreate it.  
BUT! Do you know who does figure out how to make artificial Harun El? LENA! Kara asks her to make more so her mother can take it back to Argo City and continue to sustain the population there. Lena just did something that the enlightened and decades ahead of Earth science Kryptonians were unable to do. 
Im reminded of something Mon El said when he first came into the show and was arguing with Kara. 
‘High and mighty Krypton, enlightened Krypton’ - Well, not so enlightened anymore huh? Lena Luthor is canonically smarter that what is left of the Kryptonian race put together!! 
So, they defeat Reign! (yay!) Then as Winn is saying his farewells Lena comes over and gives the case of Harun El to Alura and the recipe to make more, who respond with this. Now this is important! 
‘With this Harun El Argo will survive, though i hate to depend on it. So many things that we dont know about it, its uses, its powers its dangers, im so glad none of it will be left on Earth’. 
Right, now Lena looks visibly awkward at this and we know why. But this speech of Alura’s is really important in the sense that is not justifiable. Its really only there to make the audience see that Lena isnt supposed to have any. Why is this a dumb statement? Im glad you asked! 
. Yay Argo will survive now! But apparently Earth that has soooo many problems including environmental, diseases , food shortages, climate change, animal and plant extinction, lack of clean water. Anything you can think of, no, Earth has no business having this element that could potentially fix these issues over time, with study. It may even have to adapt to the aliens that now inhabit it but that goes over Alura’s head. 
. So many things that they dont know about it. Well no YOU dont, because you weren't even smart enough as a surviving race of people to even recreate the stuff! 
. Just because something is unknown and potentially dangerous doesn't mean it shouldn't be studied. We wouldn't have SCIENCE otherwise. This from a woman whose husband was one of Kryptons greatest scientists and is honored on Argo City. 
. ‘im so glad none of it will be left on Earth’ why? Where is your justification for this statement? Lena just did something NONE of your people could do and now you will all survive or years to come. But apparently Earth, with all its issues doesn't deserve the same treatment. Lena doesn't deserve to use the thing she just figured out how to make and knows could possibly cure cancer etc. THIS IS DUMB and SELFISH! Alura is so glad that Earth will be prevented from having something that could possible save their planet, but its OK for hers to be saved. 
. Kara by the way is just nodding her head and agreeing. She gave an entire speech back on Argo about the dangers Earth faces. But here, now that her main issue is gone, apparently the rest of Earths issues are irrelevant? Or is it  because anything a Kryptonian says has to be taken as law just because? Kara i might add was going to be a scientist to! But shes seems to have forgotten that little detail of her life? 
So to sum up. Kara gave a magnificent speech justifying why Earth needed Harun El, while unknowingly backing up everything that Lena is doing to justify having Harun El. Something that i am sure Kara (or rather the writers) will conveniently forget ever happened if and when Kara finds out what Lena is doing. Lets face it, she probably will because James doesn't approve of Lena’s choices, he’s no longer dating her and he’s so far up Kara and Clarks’s arses he probably wont be able to resist telling Kara. 
Lena, just saved the lives of an entire city of Kryptonians. I mean literary the only surviving ones beside Kara and Clark. Lena is just single handedly ensured the survival of Kara's race. She even gave them the recipe, they can now mass produce it and study it etc. Something that Alura and Kara dont think humans have the right to do?
Lena figured out how to make artificial Haren El in just a few days and while on the clock and while facing a World Killer intent on ripping out her spleen! Something that an entire race of so called superior Kryptonains full of scientists were unable to do in a few decades! 
Lena THE SCIENTIST kept some of the Harun El, because duh! She made it, she’s seen what it can do, she a bloody scientific Scientists dont see things that could possibly cure the worlds issues and be like ‘meh’. That does not a good scientist make! 
Lena’s intent was to cure cancer etc. She discovered she could basically give humans super powers. Now in this dangerous time in national city that is not unjustified. Lena believe it or not, if she takes the government contract will be the one working inside of the law, while Kara a vigilante that was told to stand down will be working outside of it! Interesting! 
Sorry that  was so long, but it was important not to leave things out. Thoughts? 
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stupidtwinkmac · 6 years
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you asked for my full psychology notes so here they are
i rewatched the entire series and wrote down all the things i thought were relevant to the characters’ psychology, theres probably some stuff missing so message me if you think i should add anything
S1e1- “The Gang Gets Racist”
Dennis wants paddys to stay a gay bar bc he likes getting validation from gay boys
“They’re really more of a blue-green”
S1e3- “Underage Drinking: A National Concern”
Dennis talks about how popular he was in high school and cries a bit when mac and charlie tell him that tim murphy slept with his prom date which is like pretty normal but it foreshadows the high school reunion episode
-
Dee goes out with a high schooler just for the validation and to live out shit she couldn't do in high school
“Wait but ive never statutory raped anyone before”
-
Mac and charlie give high schoolers a keg bc they said that mac and charlie were cool
-
Mac gets jealous that everyone got asked to a high school prom except for him
S1e7- “Charlie Gets Molested”
Mac gets jealous that he didn't get molested
“If the McPoyles got blown, and Charlie got blown, then why didn't I get blown?”
-
charlie got molested by his uncle
S2e4- “Mac Bangs Dennis’ Mom”
Dennis gets pissed that people's moms wont fuck him
“Is everyone getting laid but me?”
S2e7- “The Gang Exploits A Miracle”
Dennis starves himself for three days because Dee said his face looked fat
S3e1- “The Gang Finds A Dumpster Baby”
Dennis pretends to be a hippie just to fuck some guys girlfriend because he insulted his quaff and called him a narc
S3e2- “The Gang Gets Invincible”
Dee pretends to be a guy to try out for the eagles just to prove that she can
s3e5 - “The Aluminium Monster Vs. Fatty Magoo”
Dennis goes on a Whole Thing to prove that he’s a winner and that he hasn't peaked
“I haven't even begun to peak”,  “make it work dennis… make it work”
S3e6- “The Gang Solves the North Korea Situation”
Dee does the talent show every year to validate herself
S3e11- “Dennis Looks Like A Registered Sex Offender”
Dennis obsesses over his jawline and his weight when people tell him he looks like wendell
-
Mac’s dad gets out of jail and we can see how neglectful his parents are
S4e3- “America’s Next Top Paddy’s Billboard Model Contest”
Dennis desperately tries to prove that he’s still hot enough to be on the billboard
“I was sculpted to the proportions of Michelangelo's David”
“I realized that i don’t need validation anymore”- proves that he was just doing the billboard stuff bc of a bpd need for validation.
S4e4- “Mac’s Banging the Waitress”
Dennis gets unreasonably upset when he finds out that Charlie doesn't think he’s his best friend
-
Mac bangs the waitress to get back at Charlie for smashing his project badass tapes
S4e5- “Mac and Charlie Die Pt 1”
Dennis gets more upset that Mac and Charlie didn't include him in their suicide pact than he is about them being “dead”
S5e2- “The Gang Hits The Road”
Charlie doesn't want to go on the road trip because he’s never left philly before, he asks dennis to comfort him about his fears of bad things happening and people being assholes, he eventually freaks out and asks the hitchhiker to drop him back off at the bar
S5e10- “The D.E.N.N.I.S System”
Dennis believes that his manipulation actually makes girls fall in love with him
S6e2- “Dennis Gets Divorced”
Charlie gets real uncomfy when uncle jack tries to hug him
S6e5- “Mac and Charlie: White Trash”
Dennis tries desperately to prove that he’s high class
S6e6- “Mac’s Mom Burns Her House Down”
Charlie’s mom has OCD and Charlie also starts to pick it up
“Why are you doing everything in threes?” “Oh. So Charlie doesn't die.”
“...just playing it safe. She's been doing it. I'm still alive. Can't be crazy” “ It does feel good to do stuff in threes.”
S6e8- “The Gang Gets a New Member”
Dee gets incredibly insecure when she opens the time capsule and hasn't done what she wanted to do when she was a kid
-
Charlie gets super insecure when he thinks smitty is replacing him
S6e10- “Charlie Kelly: King of the Rats”
Charlie doesn't like leaving the bar and going out into the world
“Dee, I go to a movie or a spaghetti place with you, and out there, I'm the rat.”
Charlie has a panic attack in a sauna
“I'm trapped like a rat, aren't I?” “No, you're not, Charlie.” “ I'm a rat in here! I'm a rat! I'm trapped like a - I gotta get out of here.” “I'm tired of being in weird places, Frank, 'cause I'm trapped like a rat.” Just bash me like a rat! Bash me like a rat and get it over with!”
S6e11- “The Gang Gets Stranded in the Woods”
Charlie has to be knocked out with a sack over his head to be able to go to Atlantic City
“This is why i don’t leave philly alright cause when you leave philly, bad shit happens”
-
Mac starves himself for chase utley
-
“If animals have taught me anything it's that you can die at any time very quickly by the side of the road”
S6e12- “Dee Gives Birth”
Dennis yells at a nurse about Dee’s stories like he’s a god
“I will come down on this hospital like the hammer of Thor. The thunder of my vengeance will echo through these corridors like the gust of a thousand winds!”
-
Dee berates guys until they have sex with her
S7e1- “Frank’s Pretty Woman”
Mac gains a ton of weight and calls it packing on mass
“I went from tiny twink to the muscle bound freak you see before you”
-
Dennis admits to starving himself and literally constantly working out
“I may look relaxed but im incredibly tense at all times”
S7e2- “The Gang Goes to the Jersey Shore”
Mac knocks carlie out with chloroform to get him to the jersey shore
S7e6- “The Storm of the Century”
Dennis writes a contract for the girls he plans to invite to his rape bunker
S7e7- “Chardee Macdennis: The Game of Games
Mac says that Dee tried to kill herself
S7e10- “How Mac Got Fat”
Charlie gets overwhelmed and goes in the crevice
-
Mac blames everyone else for making him fat
-
Dennis does dumb shit because he’s self conscious about getting old and looking bad
“I was just trying to live up to all of your expectations of me” “what expectations?” “physical perfection”
The entire chemical peel scene is a good representation of his mental disorders
S7e12- “The High School Reunion”
Dee tries to be friends with the popular people from school to validate herself
-
Mac got bullied and dealt drugs in high school
-
Charlie got bullied in school and huffed glue in the bathroom
“Everyone wants dirtgrub i'll give them dirtgrub okay i'll get high i'll get sad people can laugh at me i hate highschool man”
S7e13- “The High School Reunion Part 2: The Gang’s Revenge”
The entire golden god meltdown
“Its fetish shit i like to bind i like to be bound”
“You would just come around saying shit about being a golden god or some other insane crap and referring to all of us as your minions” “You always acted like you were better than everyone else but then you would just go and hang out with ronnie the rat or dirtgrub under the bleachers”
S8e5- “The Gang Gets Analyzed”
Dennis tries to analyze the therapist
-
Mac has some real severe mood swings
The therapist talks to him about body dysmorphia
-
Dennis giving mac “size pills”
Dennis keeps psychology profiles on everyone in the gang, he started dee’s in the 2nd grade
-
Dee’s entire “tell me i’m good” scene
S8e6- “Charlie’s Mom Has Cancer”
Dennis having trouble feeling throughout the entire episode until the “my mommy’s a skeleton” “i feel to much” scene
-
Charlie being incredibly overwhelmed the entire episode, (rubbing his head at Dr. Jinx’s, Getting real upset at church)
S8e7- “Frank’s Back in Business”
Dennis pretending to be brian lefevre
“I want you to get off with me” “This is about crawling into another man’s skin”
S8e8- “Charlie Rules the World”
The entire “I Am God” sensory deprivation tank scene
Dennis blowing himself could also be symbolic but it could also just be a bit
S9e3- “The Gang Tries Desperately to Win an Award”
Mac getting really defensive about slight banter “i've had tons of orgasms i've had one with your mom”
S9e5- “Mac Day”
Mac is not okay with being upstaged by country mac when he jumps off the bridge and offers people weed
“there's nothing badass about breaking the law”
S9e6- “The Gang Saves the Day”
Macs fantasy is about everyone admiring his badass karate skills and dennis crying over his dead body saying that he loves him
-
Dee’s fantasy is about killing every man in the room and finally being appreciated for her acting skills and marrying someone who doesn't call her a bird
-
Dennis’ fantasy is about surviving a bullet to the head at point blank range and killing his idea of the perfect woman
S9e7- “The Gang Gets Quarantined”
Charlie’s mom got him vaccinated way too often and made him wear bubble boy suits during flu season, Charlie also still has the suits for some reason
-
“I am in perfect control of my body, if i felt myself getting sick i would simply say SICKNESS BE GONE”
*sustains a perfect G5* “does that sound like a man who needs to be in the hospital”
S10e2- “The Gang Group Dates”
Dennis obsesses over his star rating on a dating app
“I AM A FIVE STAR MAN”
-
Dee has one night stands with a whole lot of guys that she’s not really into just to give them one star ratings
S10e3- “Psycho Pete Returns”
Dennis does a whole psychopath monologue about skin luggage
“You haven't thought of the smell you bitch”
He gets diagnosed with BPD and gets medication
S10e6- “The Gang Misses the Boat”
Dennis’ whole range rover speech
S10e8- “The Gang Goes On Family Fight”
Dennis breaks down crying because of the buzzer
-
Dee starves herself to look good for the camera
S10e10- “Ass Kickers United; Mac and Charlie Join a Cult”
Dennis tries to prove that he’s the best at manipulating people
S11e3- “The Gang Hits the Slopes”
Charlie brings up his agoraphobia shit again
“See, this is why I don't like leaving Philly, man. This is nuts.”
S11e4- “Dee Made a Smut Film”
Dennis got raped by a librarian in high school when he was 14
“I was in an older woman that’s cool right?”
S11e9- “The Gang Goes to Hell”
Dee manipulates guys into having sex with her
“So ill insinuate that it would be a shame if my account of what happened was different from his and he got a call from the sheriff”
S11e10- “The Gang Goes to Hell: Part Two”
Charlie has a panic attack about the boat sinking and dennis calms him down
“I knew I shouldn't have come on this cruise. I knew it! I mean, it used to be I would never even leave Philly! And then, you know, you guys drag me to this, you drag me to that, and next thing I know, I-I'm stuck in a box on a sinking ship!”
-
Dennis keeps onions in his pocket so that he can cry when he needs to
S12e3- “Old Lady House: A Situation Comedy”
Bonnie doing everything in threes so that charlie doesn't die
-
“I just can't enjoy it when the people being filmed, know they're being filmed”
S12e7- “PTSDee”
Charlie and dennis bonding over their trauma
-
Dee tries to ruin a guys life bc he said she was his rock bottom
S12e8- “The Gang Tends Bar”
“I have big feelings, and it hurts”
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8/12/18 9:19am demisexual
“A demisexual is a person who does not experience sexual attraction unless they form a emotional connection. It's more commonly seen in, but by no means confined, to romantic relationships. The term demisexual comes from the orientation being "halfway between" sexual and asexual.“
I’ve been throwing this term around in my head lately. 
as preface, i’ve always hated terms like this. I actually only very recently embraced the bisexual thing because i just hate the labels. I didn’t want to call myself ‘bisexual’ or ‘queer’ because i’m just a person who is attracted to multiple genders. it doesnt matter to me, and the umbrella term queer is vile in a way to me because it means weird, and i dont think there is anything weird about the way i love or the way that any lgbtqia person loves. love is natural, not weird. just because it isnt straight, it has to be labelled weird? i dont subscribe to that idea. and i am never the person to want to add unnecessary terms to myself, because i dont like terms in general. im not forthright with my sexuality, but my group of friends is so prideful that i think its rubbed off on me, and im starting to look at the term bisexual as something to feel special about instead of ‘weird’.
with that being said, lets look at this new one. Demisexual, the way i see it, is someone who needs an emotional connection to a person before they can get sexy with them. i’ve been thinking more about it lately because ive been wondering if it is something i can relate to. 
for the longest time when i was younger, i only thought you could be gay or straight, nothing else. learning about being bisexual made sense to me, and more and more im understanding asexuality and know it is completely valid though i didnt think it was real a couple years ago. so now confronted with demisexuality, my knee jerk reaction is ‘thats fake’, which i recognize is a fucked up way to view things like sexuality because everything is so fluid and changing and i shouldnt snark at the terms people have created to define parts of that fluidity. someone somewhere said this is how i feel, and other people were like hey me too, and now its a term that anyone can identify as. 
i look at this term and i feel compelled by it but unsure if it is actually true of the way i experience sexual feelings or if i just see myself more often developing emotional connections to the people im interested in. in that way, i feel like the sexual feelings can precede the emotional connection. but then i think about how most people ive been with (consensually and enthusiastically) have been friends first, someone i felt kind of close to already that developed into sexual feelings for them, which supports the demisexual thing. 
i wonder why i havent been a ‘hookup’ person in the past. i wonder why i havent gone out more as a single person to meet new people and why i always settled for the person i felt my heart was safe with. now, i feel frustrated with myself for thinking that i may have feelings for this new person that im hooking up with. i feel mad at myself for ‘being a girl’ because ‘girls always catch feelings’. but what if its not just because im a girl but because im kind of a little bit demi? and for me to feel the best kind of sexual attraction to someone, i have to kind of convince myself that i would date them if they asked, or at least catch a few feels so that the sex is satisfying. 
i think about the first time we hooked up, on the 4th of july. it was really my first time ever talking to him, didnt know him at all other than the fact that he smoked a lot and had a good taste in music. i was drunk and looking to just hookup with someone, but when it came down to it when we were alone, i couldnt do it. i felt apathetic and not into it. i didnt put in much effort. he was grabbing at me and holding me and i kinda felt nothing? not even just that i didnt feel sexually enthralled by him, but i just felt literally nothing. jaded and apathetic and aloof. thats not a sexually satisfying experience.
then i think about how after that night together, i left without really saying goodbye. i just wanted to get out and go do other things with my day. i didnt want him to get my number, i lowkey wanted to never see him again.. but then he found me on social media and facebook and sort of initiated further contact, and then things changed for me. i started thinking about him. i started looking to see if he was watching my stories and liking my pictures, and when he would dm me i got kind of excited? fast forward to a month later, i invited him to this party with the same group of people because i actually wanted to hook up with him now. i had built it up in my head that this person was actually interested in me as a person and actually might like me, and there was nothing more attractive than the idea that this person might like me.. once i felt like that, i went for him, and the hook up was fucking amazing. sort of courting each other most of the day and cuddling and looking like a couple all day leading up to having an epic hook up that night.. mmph.. 
anyway, the difference is crazy because this second time, i was really into it. i knew going into the day that i was going to probably hook up with this guy, and didnt know how to act around each other but he just comes in and puts his arm around me first thing and the rest is history. i was so into it, i was such an active participant, and really trying to initiate things.. 
is that because i was just really horny lately? is it because we had the whole day leading up to it and there was anticipation? or is it because actually developing an ounce of an emotional connection made me really attracted to him?.. like is all of this because im actually kinda demisexual and need the emotional connection to want to fuck you? or is it because im just a ‘girl’ and ‘girls catch feels’.. like i dont know..
at the end of the day, i dont really care about the labels. i dont need to call myself demisexual to feel special, i just kind of want to know if thats the reason that i treat sex and hookups the way that i do. to be able to tell myself that im not just a dumb girl who catches feels for any guy who looks at her a certain way, but that in order to be really satisfied in sexual circumstances, i need to kinda feel connected to you emotionally.. and maybe thats not the worst thing in the world. and the validity of being demisexual doesnt mean that im falling in love with every person that i am physical with, just that i probably wont go home with someone from a bar. i probably wont make a tindr just to get laid. i probably wont jump at the option to fuck some stranger, cuz thats not satisfying in the way that spending a whole day getting to know someone and spending the night dry humping is.. lol
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(darling don't be afraid) i will love you
Happy late-vday-early-bday @ryn-exe (can’t tag?)!!! Hope u enjoy, soz if it’s not good but i’m not so amazing(phil)
This is 2.1k words. There’s a bit of dream-violence (not in detail) and a lot of anxiety and fear so if u don’t like that stuff!! Tell me!!!! And i’ll write something else for you, i don’t mind. (You didn’t say anything i wasn’t supposed to write but idk). I’d describe this as hurt/comfort i think lmaooo
Basic summery i wrote fo myself: Dan and Phil, and how they deal with each other’s 3am fears (2009 vs 2018, now)
From a pitch-hitter 💓💓
——
[Saturday; 10.26.09; 03:37]
——
Dan<33 (03:37): phil? :[
Phil (03:45): Yrha
Phil (03:47): Sorry!! Yeah**
Phil (03:47): Why are you up so early/late?? I barely woke up
Dan<33 (03:49): sorry i woke you :/
Dan<33 (03:50): my parents went away for a bit and i’m home alone and i cant turn off the lights cuz im too scared
Dan<33 (03:51): and i can’t sleep so bad even hugging pillow cant help mee :[[
Dan<33 (03:52): so im sitting in the hallway with every light im the house on alone in just my pants
Dan<33 (03:52): and i was a idiot and missed you so i woke you up at so late and now ur gonna hate me crap
Dan<33 (03:52): sorry
Phil (03:53): I’ll never ever hate you dan!!! <<33333333333333
Phil (03:53): I’m sorry ur so scared :[[ I wish I was there to be strong and protect u again
Dan<33 (03:54): i wish you were here too
Phil (03:54): :[ <3
Dan<33 (03:58): CDAP PHIL I THINK I HESRF A GHOST
Dan<33 (03:58): IR MONSTER
Dan<33 (03:58): FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK
Phil (03:59): Dan oh my gosh are you okay??
Dan<33 (04:00): yeah i think but
Dan<33 (04:00): i heard something phil
Dan<33 (04:01): im scared
Dan<33 (04:02): i can’t believe im 18 and i’m actually sobbing out of fear alone and naked in a hallway over a fucking noise
Dan<33 (04:02): to my boyfriend
Dan<33 (04:02): on skype
Dan<33 (04:03): fuck
Phil (04:03): Dan :[[ i’m so sorry
Dan<33 (04:04): it’s not your fault
Phil (04:04): Want me to call you??? (If u want)
Dan<33 (04:05): can we skype instead?
Dan<33 (04:05): i want to see your face plz <3
Dan<33 (04:05): if thats okay
Phil (04:06): That’s fine! One sec plz :]
——
[Phil would like to add Dan<33 to a call (02:33)]
[Accept] [Decline]
[Accepted]
——
When Dan answered the call, his face was red and puffed and wet. Even through the crap-pixel screen quality, Phil could see that.
“Hey,” Dan’s voice broke.
“Hi,”
Dan was shaking slightly.
His face suddenly flushed, “Oh shit, I forgot – I’m, uh, in only pants. In front of you. Crap.”
“It’s fine, I’ve seen you shirtless before.” Phil smiled what he hoped was reassuringly, “Are you okay?”
“Yeah — I mean, I am now. I guess.”
“Are you cold?”
“Kinda.” Dan admitted.
“Want to go to bed?”
“My room is too dark –”
“Well, I’ll be there, wont I? And I’ll protect you from everything bad in the dark.”
“You’re not really here.”
“Only ever a few hours away. And if worst comes to worst, I have the police line and the monster-killer line. So you’ll be super safe.”
Dan muffled a giggle, “Yeah, okay.”
He shuffled up off the floor, and made his way into his bedroom, clutching the laptop tightly.
“I dunno if I’m getting any sleep tonight, honestly.”
“You will! You can cuddle your pillow and I’ll tell you stories until the demons go away and you can sleep.”
“I’m not five, Phil.” There was no malice in his reply.
“You don’t need to be five for any of that to be true.” Phil said, serious tone.
“Okay,”
Minutes later, Dan was snuggled under his covers; hugging a pillow tightly as he listened to Phil go on about some guy at the market.
“Then, he pulled a hot dog out of his left pocket. Who keeps a single —”
“Phil?” Dan interrupted, his voice was dripping with sleep.
“Mm?”
“Do you think I’m stupid?”
“No.” Phil answered simply.
“I mean – for being so scared of such dumb stuff. Seven-year-olds are braver than me.”
“It’s okay to have fears, Dan. I bet you’re not the only adult with those fears either,”
“I’m scared of the dark. And ghosts and monsters and moths and demons and –”
“– and that’s fine. I don’t mind.”
“And it’s not annoying to deal with? I’m not?”
“You will never be annoying to ‘deal with’; I promise.”
Phil meant it.
——
[Monday; 12.07.09; 02:59]
——
Phil :]]]<333333 (02:59): Dan?
Dan (03:00): yeah??? <3
Phil :]]]<333333 (03:03): I’m scared
Dan (03:04): of what :[[
Phil :]]]<333333 (03:04): I dunno it’s just creaky downstairs and I’m alone for the night I guess
Phil :]]]<333333 (03:04): Nvm
Dan (03:05): no tell me i want to help u
Dan (03:05): plz
Phil :]]]<333333 (03:07): Well it’s just that
Phil :]]]<333333 (03:08): It’s really dark and windy
Phil :]]]<333333 (03:08): And there was a tree snapping against my window I thought our house might’ve blown down
Phil :]]]<333333 (03:09): And I thought i heard thunder which usually isn'tn too bad but right now its scaring me a bit
Phil :]]]<333333 (03:10): I don’t wanna be alone rn is all
Phil :]]]<333333 (03:10): But i am brave! So it’ll be okay i think
Phil :]]]<333333 (03:10): Don’t worry about me <33
Dan (03:11): i want to worry :[
Dan (03:11): you don’t always have to be brave <333 ily and i would give you the biggest hug if i were there
Dan (03:12): and tell the trees and thnder to fuck off and let you sleep
Dan (03:12): and then we would sleep all cuddled up togerher like we do sometimes and it would be warm and nice
Dan (03:14): i wish i were there with you
Phil :]]]<333333 (03:15): You will be someday so it’s okay now too :]
Phil :]]]<333333 (03:15): But plz tell the trees and thunder to fuck off it’s very loud :’[[[
Dan (03:16): if u call me i will????
Phil :]]]<333333 (03:17): Lol okay :p
——
[Incoming call from Dan]
[Accepted]
——
“Hi!” Dan really should be quieter; last time he called Phil at three in the morning his dad had yelled at him.
“Hi,” Phil’s sleep-laced voice answered.
A booming crack of thunder, and a whimper.
“Don’t worry – it… won’t hurt you.” Despite everything, Dan was sometimes still quite new to the role of 'comfort’ in their relationship.
“I know, just loud.”
Dan wished he was like Phil. He wished he could just pull out an intresting story, a funny idea.
“Sorry.”
He wasn’t like Phil, though.
“Want to play a game?”
“What game could we possibly play through a phone call?” Dan could practically hear Phil rolling his eyes.
Dan wracked his brain for quick ideas.
“Eye-Spy?”
“We’re… not in the same room Dan.”
“Yeah, true.”
Dan’s room suddenly felt rather empty and uninteresting.
Dan felt empty and uninteresting.
“What do you want me to do?” He finally muttered.
He held his breath.
“I just like hearing your voice, it calms me down. I like when you rant about things you love.”
Let it out.
“Oh. Well – want to hear my never-ending thoughts on WALL-E then?”
“Definitely.”
——
[Sunday; 02.04.18; 04:12]
——
“Phil?”
“Mhm?” He rolled over and rubbed the sleep from his eyes, “What’re you doing up?”
“There was a moth.”
“A moth?”
“Yes!” Dan looked around the room nervously, rolling on his heels, “It’s in the lounge somewhere and I can’t sleep knowing it’s out there — lurking.”
Phil groaned.
“Fucking kill it! Or set it free, I dunno. I just need it gone.”
“You are truly the perfect mix of 'needy child’ and 'angry businessman’, Danny.”
“Fuck off.”
“Mm, lemme get a cup then.”
Phil shoved on his glasses and stumbled out of bed into the kitchen, Dan following closely behind.
“Where was it again?” He asked, grabbing a wine glass from the cupboard.
They hadn’t really drank much alcohol these past few years– since Dan had gone on antidepressents— but they still always kept the glasses, to drink Ribena and seem fancy.
“No! You’ll need a bigger cup, it’s huge.” He whined.
“Okay,” he grabbed another glass, “where is it?”
“In the lounge last I saw.”
“I’ll go look, you get a piece of paper.”
Genuine terror painted over Dan’s face, “I don’t want to be alone.”
“Christ’s sake Dan, it’s a moth, not an armed burglar. I think you’ll live.”
“You don’t know that.”
“I do. Now, just go a minute.”
He then ventured into the lounge, still half-drowned by sleep, when he heard a shriek.
“Dan?”
“Phil! Fucking help!”
Anyone else might’ve thought Dan was being held at gunpoint from the panicked way he was yelling.
“Coming!”
He went into the hall; Dan was standing there, paralysed with fear, as a giant moth flew circles around him. He had tears threatening to fall.
“Oh dear,”
Phil went over to the closet and grabbed a broom, spent a few go’s waving it around– and almost hitting Dan in the process— before smacking it head on.
“Aw, now I feel bad for killing it,” He whispered.
Dan was on the floor now, shaking, tears stained down his cheeks. He was in only pants.
And Phil was there.
“Well, the moth’s gone now isn’t it?” He crouched down next to Dan, putting his hands gently on his shoulders.
“Mmm,” Dan had his head tucked in his knees.
“Are you okay?”
Silence.
“That’s fine. Want me to make you some tea?”
“Yeah.”
“Okay.”
A few minutes later, in the kitchen, with dried cheeks; “I can’t believe how much of a wimp I am.”
The kettle rang, and Phil took it off the stove carefully.
“No —”
“I know, I know, my therapist told me. 'It’s never weak to have fears’. But I cried over a fucking moth. In our hallway. It’s late and –”
“– and that’s okay.”
“It’s not okay Phil!”
“It’s fine in the moment, that’s what I mean.”
He grabbed a NASA mug, and poured the boiling water in a teapot.
“I must be exhausting.”
Phil dropped in a teabag.
He still remembered. It was a promise made at 4am; a promise over Skype to a more-than-slightly-terrified eighteen year old.
A promise made to a bunch of pixel’s with a name and a face and fear.
A promise his Dan probably didn’t even remember, honestly.
“No, I promised that much.”
“Mhm,”
He poured the tea.
“So, two sugars or three?”
“Two.”
——
[Friday; 02.16.18; 05:12]
——
Dan was on the sofa; snuggled up in blankets and watching the winter Olympics through his small Iphone screen. His eyes were heavy, he yawned.
Their bedroom door squeaked opened.
“Hey,” Phil spoke quietly.
“Up so late?”
“You’re up too.”
“Well — I’m watching the Olympics. You know it’s on late in the UK.”
“Alright.” Phil shuffled into the kitchen, grabbing a glass and leaving the cupboard door wide open.
“Why are you awake?”
“Just another nightmare, s'fine.”
“Then why did you come out here?”
His voice might’ve been read as upset – he was just tired. Half the time Dan honestly didn’t mean to come off so rude.
“Dunno,”
“What was it about?”
“Uh — I think my family was trapped, you included, and I was the only person who could save them. But I had to do something… I think, I had to open a lock to somewhere? But I was too nervous. I saw everyone die; I knew it was my fault. I saw – you know, blood. Not too much. But it’s fine.”
As he spoke, he went over to the sink and got a glass of water, adding iced-cubes; his tone was unnaturally cool and casual.
“But I heard your skull shatter –”
“What the fuck —”
“Sorry! You asked though.”
“No – I mean, that’s horrible. Jesus christ, are you okay?”
Phil shrugged, “It happens, it’s okay though. Just a dream.”
It was only at that moment Dan noticed Phil’s eyes were a little too redded, his words a little bit shaky.
Phil started back to their room.
“Are you going back to sleep?”
“Probably.” His reply was tired.
“Oh – uh, well, why don’t you stay with me and watch the Olympics? I know you’ve never really cared, not your thing, but still I think that —”
“Sure! I’ll stay, yeah.” Phil quickly answered.
“Okay.”
Phil put his glass of water back down on the counter, and walked over to the sofa. Dan opened up his blanket fort and invited Phil in.
“These are the men’s single runs.”
“Mhm,” Phil nuzzled his head into Dan’s neck, which usually would’ve bothered him, but he didn’t mind so much.
A few minutes pass, “So what’s that guy supposed to be doing? I need your commentary; you know.”
I just like hearing your voice, it calms me down.
“Well, that’s the Japanese lead skater, which means —”
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fmdxjerome · 6 years
Text
*naomi pokes her head in after disappearing for the 600th time* bonjour 
family things where the reason i was so m.i.a. this past week. but i’m here now and i’m going to follow and unfollow people. update some things (like points, plots and tag lists) and head into ims. the good things. sorry i keep disappearing, it’s a weird time. i hope you all are doing good though. people who i have not talked to yet, i’m sorry i still haven’t introduced myself to you all. i’ll gradually work on this. people who i plotted with before, you know i’m gradually trying to get back to that too. i’m very out of the loop with everything.
though! working on some things. writing, photoshop, things, yeah.
but that aside i kinda wanted to take the space of this ooc post to elaborate on the headcanon i wrote yesterday? because? wow. uh. what the hell was that. i wont talk about the topics of the story itself so dont worry if they are triggering to you, i wont be mentioning anything in here.
i just. i started writing the headcanon because my inspiration for anything else was nil. i had things done for my starter (things that had to go out before it for the starter to make sense) and i was preparing to write but nothing came out. and i saw the days ticking by then so i thought “a headcanon will give me something to put out as i dont want to loose jerome but also don’t want to go on hiatus again”. i thought it’ll be like 1000 words and just explain seulgi and chanyeol a bit but it turned into that. i kinda got sucked into it. like, very badly. i wrote it in two days and two nights with little sleep and a lot of tears and it fucked me up but not in a bad way persay (not in a good way either but). after my hiatus i’ve been all kinds of weird with jerome? i haven’t known how to put him out there and advertise him as a cool dude to new and old people in here and i blame my mood for that? because when i was all meme kid 2000 it was easier to thrust him into people’s dm’s, but then after the hiatus i’ve been so goddamned serious about everything that even the funny posts i try to make dont make it to the blog because i think about them too much? (honestly. i have a backlog of memes guys.). then i write that, start writing that with the beginning and end in mind and it’s so goddamned dark but it gets my emotions out and makes me feel more intrigued to flesh out jerome. it relieves me a bit. 
because the thing about jerome is that family is one of the most important things for him. and exploring chanyeol, who had everything jerome had wanted when he grew up (to be raised by a mother who looked like him and loved him), made me find jerome again. it’s the comparing of lives that do it, how two brothers that came from the same prompt live such different lives because of the polarizing answers their mothers gave to one of the hardest question in life. but then again they have so much the same; the drinking, the faces, the laughs, the ridicule, and so much more. they’re more like twins than they are brothers, just years apart and not quite the same.
(there is a reason why *if you read the story* i pinned their situations against each other often, give the perspective of jerome’s life whilst giving context to chanyeols)
and i dont know if jerome will ever know about chanyeol, meet seulgi, find a connection with his mother, feel a bond with his sibling (who’s connection form is almost done, i’m hoping for a sister) or find the bad of himself in his father but it’s the start of exploring this part of jerome’s life, his bloodlines, that get me so much more into jerome’s story. because it is such an important piece in his life.
and look, you might think “but thats marie!” if you look over his blog or read his bio (please dont. its ugly.), that she’s the most influential thing in jerome’s character as she’s the one who basically created “yuddy”. and yeah, she’s important. he still gets anxious when she teeters with the information only they know and still gets furious when he sees her face. but it’s family that starts it all. 
he wouldn’t be as searching for warmth if it wasn’t for the fact that he views himself to be abandoned when just a baby, which his mother did with all the heart break in her heart. he wouldn’t be as proving and intense if it wasn’t for the fact that he feels like he has just one moment to cement himself in someone’s memory as something to desire (whether its about music, lust, love, etc.). he wouldn’t be as afraid of loosing important people in his life if he hadn’t lost the most important one of all.
also, he wouldn’t be as natural with the flirting and the charming smirks if it wasn’t for the fact that his father had that natural allure to him, too. had that bad treatment, too. had that booming confidence, too. and had that selfishness, too. (i villainize chanwook a lot. but he was just a guy who didn’t like commitments, he wants the fun and nothing else. hmm doesn’t that sound familiar.)
yuddy was a reaction to marie, but made possible because of chanwook. hey, thats pretty deep.
anyway, what also was interesting with exploring chanyeol was the fact that jerome’s biggest wish was to be able to look at someone and recognize himself in it. with his adoption family he obviously couldnt do that. and to add another layer in his hometown there were no korean faces, no ethnicity he could belong to. (i dont know how it is in legit laval and martigné-sur-mayenne as i am just a dumb kid who only has the internet to find things out BUT as i live in a western european town *obliviously naomi you’re dutch* thats pretty big and those towns arents the biggest i can use my own experiences and grab the data/information i can find on the internet to create young!jerome’s school and daily life environment.) but he could live with that if he just had a mother or/and a father he could look up to and see himself. there have been days where he’s been bullied for the shape of his eyes or the colour of his skin, there have been days where he’s been fetishized for them too, and if he was allowed to look up at his mother he could see the same pairs of eyes stare back at him. and if he’d look at his father he’d see the same coloured skin. he’d feel more at ease. but he sees blonde hair and peachy skin instead, sees hazel eyes and different noses. add a DEEPER layer and he can’t seem to find where he gets his ugly wide laugh from, or his aggression when provoked. the gentle touch to the things he loves. the intensity of passion. the greed of selfishness. he doesn’t know where the traits come from, who gives him those traits, or if they are purely his own. and he truly wished he did.
and with that as he stands on stage now he is unaware that he makes two women cry every night. blissfully unaware that he has two mothers look at him and see the man that left them but see their missed sons too. he knows nothing of that, and so he knows nothing of the impact he’s making with simply existing. (boram looking at jerome is still very ambiguous in my mind though as her kid can appear in roleplay but seulgi’s view is pretty cemented)
okay shit this kind of turned into some weird exploration of jerome? i started writing this like 6 hours ago what the hell. i’m so slow. maybe this is helping me too with making that re-introduction thing i still have to make. great. well what you can take from this is that jerome has a definite baseline when it comes to his personality and i explored that in chanyeols story where he was the one who got it yet felt undeserving of it?
it’s affection. his baseline is affection. his baseline is warmth. for him as a person, a real person, his person. and not for anything else. and it’s nice to look at the people that gave that to him, the people that didn’t and the reasons behind it.
his biological mother couldn’t give it to him because she gave him away before she could. (the only exception being the first moment in the hospital room 26 years ago.)
his biological father couldn’t give it to him seeing as he didn’t even care to know him.
his adoptive parents couldn’t give it to him as they only saw him as a prop next to jade vases and ricepaper fans.
his first love marie couldn’t give it to him even when he thought she could, but then in time he realized she never loved him for him. realized she never loved him at all.
his grandfather has given it to him, as he sang with him to old tunes and learned him how to cook. his grandmother did too before she fell away.
frederic and halit gave it to him, freddy when he cemented himself as his first closest friend and halit when he pulled him along and shared his family with him. they both gave him a home, and they both gave him the concept of best friends.
julien too gifts it to him now, as he has poked through the shields that is yuddy and has never stopped grasping at the heart that is jerome.
its interesting. it’s all interesting and i’m kind of content that i threw this headcanon out there? or wrote it. (even if not many people will probably read it because of the content matter or because its dumb long or other reasons) because its really a start for me to explore jerome other sides more, the other important things. with the marie story half way finished and her changing in severity in his life, it’ll be interesting to further explore the facet that hurt jerome the most. bloodlines.
ok i got to stop because literally no one is having time for my wall of mess i mean wall of text and its getting way too late/early whilst i wanted to reply to some dms so im just going to grab my phone and start typing there. until i fall asleep. which honestly can be in a few minutes as today was stressful (my cat couldnt poop and i cried lol i’m actually a mess.) 
ALSO if you read the story, the program seulgi watched when she saw jerome for the first time was You Hee-yeol's Sketchbook when DEAN was on. and the songs she heard where HALF MOON (D) and ORDINARY PEOPLE. (which are probably one of my favourite performances of dean.) easter egg. or something like that i dont know-
ok naomi out
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*uses a gif of my sweet winter child as i haven’t used one in ages*
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wannasoftimagine · 7 years
Text
lee daehwi as your soulmate
imagine having daehwi as ur soulmate where u have the date u meet written on ur wrist
(as requested!)
ur soulmate clue isnt really visible for awhile just bc ure like. a tiny kid for the first majority of ur life lol
for awhile u just have a smudge of ink on ur wrist so,,, u dont rlly have a choice but to let it be
ANYWAYS
once u start to get older, the markings on ur wrist start to become more and more clear
ure not super sure if theyre letters or numbers or smthn else, bc it doesnt show up on ur skin quite right yet
eventually, ure able to decipher it as a set of numbers and ure like. okay cool BUT WHAT DOES IT MEAN
u talk it over w some of ur family and friends, and everyone seems to have their own idea abt what it means
but the more ppl u talk to, the more they start to agree tht it seems like a date - for several years in the future
at tht point u realize that its probably the day tht ull finally meet ur soulmate, so theres not rlly much u can do abt it until then
ure a little tempted to try and search for someone with a similar clue, but there are just SO MANY to sort thru tht u decide its not rlly worth it
u try and focus on urself - struggling thru school, spending time w family/friends, typical stuff that most ppl ignore bc theyre too busy searching for their soulmate
honestly its kinda nice knowing when ull meet ur soulmate, since u can relax until then
time passes bc u kno. tht tends to happen in life
SO
it starts to get closer and closer to the date when u meet and NOW the nerves are coming
bc ure like ?? what are they like? what if i dont like them? what if they dont like //me//? where are we gonna meet? what time? do they have the same clue? what if i dont recognize them????
honestly ure a mess of worries by the time the day comes
trying to sleep the night before is almost impossible since ure such a bundle of doubts as u toss and turn in ur bed
come morning, u do ur best to dress as nice as u can
but honestly ure starting to doubt ur sense of fashion and style at this point
eventually u have to calm urself down bc theres no point in stressing out too much, or else ure just going to freak out and have an awful day, soulmate or not
then ure like waaaait a second,,
n u realize tht u dont know when exactly or where ure going to meet ur soulmate
which makes things much harder tbh
u settle on staying on a park bench, watching ppl pass and letting ur wrist casually rest beside u so its out in the open
ure hoping tht someones just going to walk by and be like oH HELLO SOULMATE
as time goes on u realize tht ure not that lucky
actually ure prob rlly unlucky bc bugs seem like theyre attacking u and u take tht as ur cue to leave
ure wandering around a little bit when u stumble across this cute little hole-in-the-wall cafe, so u decide to go in and rest ur feet there
(also maybe meet ur soulmate bc tht would be super Aesthetic u feel)
anyways
u wait around with a cup of coffee and a bagel, hoping that ull see someone walk in with a mark similar to urs
u realize pretty quickly tht it wont happen bc 1) so many ppl keep coming in and out, and 2) no one walks around showing off their wrist tbh
tht leaves u growing more frustrated and worried in ur spot
part of u wants to just approach random strangers and ask “listen im meeting my soulmate today CAN I SEE UR WRIST”
but the realistic part of u is like “what the heck no dont do tht”
u settle on agreeing with the latter
at some point, as ure boring holes into the dozens of strangers frequenting the cafe, u start to nod off
u dont even notice until one of the workers is shaking u awake with a polite smile and telling u tht the store is closing, so ure going to have to please leave
thts when ure like “wow,,, i was rlly tired bc it is LATE outside” but also “WAIT WHAT IF MY SOULMATE CAME HERE WHEN I WAS ASLEEP”
even as u frantically look around, u dont see any cutely written messages from ur presumed soulmate or anything like tht
all u can think is tht maybe ur soulmate clue doesnt mean what u thought it did
after all, its around evening already, and u still havent seen a sign of them
u end up wandering around outside again, too worried abt the possibility of never meeting ur soulmate to be freaked out over the whole “tiny kid walks around alone in the dark!!!!” thing
anywho
u keep checking ur phone (and feeling rlly grateful tht u havent run out of battery yet) and time just keeps to slip thru ur fingers
u end up going to a small restaurant for dinner, but its a place tht uve visited before and u dont see anyone new that could be ur soulmate
afterwards u decide to head on home with a heavy heart
u keep thinking “mb its not the date when we meet??”
but honestly ure not sure what else it could be
like is it the date ur soulmate is born?? but thtd be a kinda creepy age difference,,
and,,,, okay yeah u cant rlly think of anything else
u may or may not get lost a couple of times bc ure so absorbed in ur own thoughts
it doesnt help tht ure not exactly the best with directions
by the time u think ure nearing ur home, ur phone flashes at u with the time 11.51pm and ure like “???!!!!!!!!!!!”
u dont even know what to think at tht point
but then u get hit with the realization tht ure not meeting ur soulmate today and u might never meet them at all, and ure crushed with this aching sense of nothingness
ure just about ready to curl into a ball and just lie on the street for the rest of ur life when u hear someone yell “URE WALKING IN CIRCLES”
and u snap ur head up to try and see who said tht, and u see someone sticking his head out of his window and gesturing wildly
“wHAT” u manage to yell back, bc itd be embarrassing if this guy was trying to help u navigate around and u ended up sobbing back in response
“URE GOING IN CIRCLES UVE PASSED MY WINDOW LIKE 10 TIMES”
and thats.. just as embarrassing tbh
“ARE U LOST??? WHERE DO U LIVE”
all good intentions aside, u frown at his figure to tell him “IM NOT TELLING U WHERE I LIVE”, a pause, and then u add on “U CREEP” bc ure a strong independent individual who doesnt need any freaky dude in ur life
“AT LEAST USE UR PHONE OR SMTHN!!!! URE NEVER GOING TO GET HOME AT THIS POINT”
u feel a little dumb at that bc,,, honestly uve been so wrapped up in ur head tht u kinda forgot u could just use ur phone for directions back home
still just as u pull it out, it flashes a “dead battery” symbol and just. dies on u
“ITS DEAD” u tell the guy, altho ure not rlly sure why ure telling him this bc what if he really is a creep and now he knows u cant call for help ??????????
“IM COMING DOWN”
okay, thats definitely not helping ur i-think-hes-a-serial-killer idea
when he finally closes the window and makes his way down and outside to u, uve prepared urself with a rock
just,, in case,,,,,
(its not even a really good rock but u gotta do what u gotta do)
“i didnt want to keep yelling” the guy says, and he looks much sweeter in person (and when hes not screaming directions at u)
he sticks out his hand and ure like ?? but u take it anyways
“im lee daehwi!! do u want to borrow my phone?” he holds it out to u and even tho ure really tempted to take it, ure still a little skeptical
“if i put my address in there, then ull know where i live and u can track me afterwards”
he seems to find tht both very amusing and very insulting, since his face contorts into a half-laugh half-grimace
its a funny sight in of itself, so u cant help but smile at his expression
u end up bickering a little bit, and by the time he shoves his phone into ur face, u glance at the time and its past midnight and oh
today isnt the day u meet ur soulmate, then
ur face falls and he immediately yanks his hand back, obviously concerned
“are u okay?? whats wrong????”
and even tho hes still basically a stranger u cant help but show ur wrist to him and manage to explain tht u thought u were going to meet ur soulmate today, but its too late bc u still havent met them
but daehwi is giggling and ure like “dONT BE A JERK” but hes already pushing his own wrist into ur face
instead of the date, his reads “11.51 PM” in the same small dark font, and its like oh. OHHHHH
he pushes at ur shoulder, teasing u tht ur clue was more obvious bc “i had to wait around every day to see if i met someone new!!! i just want to sleep but i had no idea when id meet u”
and even as hes pouting u can barely process how relieved u are so u. accidentally zone out juuuust a little bit
he notices of course, and manages to get ur attention by saying “im glad its u tho bc ure super cute”
u stare at him, suddenly super focused on him, and he laughs
“i was just trying to get ur attention, but i do think ure rlly cute”
ure both still a bit in shock, but u manage to carry on conversations well enough bc now tht u know ure each others soulmates, ure desperate to talk to each other forever
he ends up insisting on cutting ur convo short and walking u home bc its so late, but he gives u his number and a quick, embarrassed peck on the cheek with a promise to talk to u soon
its even harder to fall asleep that night, ur head filled the memory of daehwi grinning at u like ure the best thing hed ever seen
others: jisung | sungwoon | daniel | woojin | more coming soon!
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