unconventional methods - chapter 2
Summary: Bucky Barnes struggles with his feelings towards Bunny, leading him to make a big mistake. Now he must make it right. It means doing something he is uncomfortable with.
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female Reader (SHIELD Agent Bucky Barnes x Adult Content Creator Reader)
Word Count: 6.7K
Warnings: 18+ NSFW MINORS DNI, texting, overthinking, self-doubt, misunderstandings, pet names, video call, mutual masturbation, slight dirty talk if you squint, metal arm use, use of a dildo, teasing, small dose of sub/dom dynamic, no mention of y/n.
A/N: Thank you so much to everyone who showed interest in the first chapter. I really didn't expect this story to get the attention it did. Means a lot to me. If you didn't read the first chapter, you definitely should before reading this one.
unconventional methods - chapter 1
marvelous lizzie's masterlist
This story will end with chapter three, which will most likely come out the following Sunday (12th March)
Once again >> indicates incoming messages and <<; indicates outgoing messages.
Once again a big thank you to @notafunkiller and @es1dit for everything. Extra thanks to @notafunkiller for the beta-read and for helping me to improve the story. You two are the best!
All work is mine, please do not repost or translate without my permission.
Every like, comment and reblog is highly appreciated. Don’t hesitate to message me or send me a question or comment regarding the stories I write. I would love to talk about it and no, it would never bother me as long as it’s not a hate comment. They are never welcome.
Read more tag starts after the first paragraph of the story.
Gifs belong to @fysebastianstan I wanted to add them through Tumblr gifs but couldn't find them that way. I hope it's alright to use them and if not, I can remove them if requested.
<<< Previous Chapter
After that magical night, Bucky found himself overthinking again. He was definitely struggling with the feelings he had for her. They were sexual, but that was not all. He had been in only sexual relationships before the war. It was like an agreement: purely sexual and for fun. Some girls wanted a bit more experience before finding the love of their lives, and it was totally fine, but this… this definitely wasn’t the same. He was feeling possessive over her and the feeling was so strange, especially considering they did not even meet face to face.
Of course, he knew he wasn’t the only person she was sharing this side of herself with. Posting adult content was literally her job. There was no doubt other men would like to get closer to her and she would probably talk to them a little, see how she feels and if things fall into place, they would get to see this side of her and she would get aroused just for them. A rare sight. Anybody would be lucky to witness that.
He still couldn’t believe she was into him. It was probably more of the idea of him, not the real him since she didn’t know who he actually is, right? He knew his dick wasn’t a disappointment, his body was fine, but definitely could be better. There was always space for improvement. She did not see the metal arm or his face. She only heard his voice, saw some parts of his body, and created a different version of Bucky. Not even Bucky, James. Some 33-year-old dude named James who was partially good-looking. In her mind, he must be someone else, completely different from reality.
That was what she should be for him too, right? Some random super attractive girl on the internet who was willing to talk to him? Nothing more. Yet he couldn’t force himself to feel nothing but sexual attraction toward her. He tried to focus on work, but he couldn’t. Mission reports were always boring anyway. How were they supposed to distract him?
>> Hey handsome, I hope you’re having a good day.
Her texting him doesn’t help, either. It’s just making it harder for him to stay away. He needed to distance himself, get a new perspective and maybe, maybe have a chance to realize he was being ridiculous. But she was so hard to resist her, especially when she was just wishing him a good day like this, with no expectation or pressure.
<< Hey, Bunny. It’s boring, but I’ll survive. I hope you are having a good day.
>> Oh, I’m having a great day. Especially after last night…
Bucky closed his eyes and took a deep breath when he read the message. He just wished she wouldn’t bring it up. It was great, he can’t deny it, but he knew… he fucking knew it was nothing special for her, and remembering that just broke his heart a little more. She shouldn’t have to act like it meant something to her. The idea of her faking something was just unbearable.
<< You know you don’t have to…
>> I don’t have to what?
<< I’m grateful that you made me feel special. It felt great, but I know I’m not special or anything and you don’t have to act like I am. It’s fine.
Her responses came in so quickly, he had a bit of a hard time following them.
>> What the fuck, James?
>> What the actual fuck?
>> Do you think I am doing this with everyone?
>> Is that how low you think of me?
>> You think I open my messages, talk to the ones that seem okay, and send them special photos in my spare time?
>> Why would I fucking do that? What am I gaining? Loyal followers? More paying customers? People don’t wanna pay shit for things they can get for free. I know that better than anyone. It’s my job!
>> You think I pick the ones that are good-looking, and just have fun? If that were the case you wouldn’t even have a chance! Do you know why? You don’t even have a profile picture! I didn’t even know your name for days! I don’t even know if you are single or married or divorced!
>> If you think I’m treating loyal customers like this or something you are wrong. God, I feel so stupid because I thought you were different. Why would you be any different than the others? Just because you respected my boundaries, just because you didn’t ask for private photos, and just because you reminded me of those gentlemen from 40s movies, it doesn’t mean you are not after the same thing they are.
>> You have no idea what I am risking just by talking with you. God, I’m so stupid.
>> You got what you want and now you are done with the small talk. I get it. I’m backing off. Sorry for disturbing you.
<< Bunny, bunny, bunny!
<< No, please, stop! That’s not what I meant.
<< Please, give me a chance to explain myself.
<< Please.
<< That’s not what this was, believe me.
>> Explain what? How this is nothing special for you? It was just a bit of fun time with the girl you were following online? I don’t want to hear it.
>> You don’t have to explain anything to me. You don’t owe me an explanation, I’m just a random girl who shares adult content. Obviously, I have no soul or feelings.
<< I’m the one who has feelings for you, okay?! I didn’t think you would find me interesting or special because I don’t feel like I am.
<< I am sorry. I think I was just projecting. That’s what my therapist would say.
<< I just didn’t wanna make you uncomfortable with my feelings. I thought they would be totally unrequited.
>> You have feelings for me?
>> You better not be lying to get out of trouble, James!
<< I’m not, I swear. Just give me a chance, okay?
>> Fine. You get one chance. Tonight. You explain yourself on a video call or I’m not talking to you anymore.
<< Whatever you want, doll. Whatever you want. Just don’t step out of my life.
***
The day did not seem to pass fast enough. It felt like time was standing still just to torture Bucky more. The work was much more boring than usual: a lot of paperwork, signatures, and chasing the right people. Not that he was chasing anyone. He was sitting and pitying himself while waiting for Natasha to show up. He just wanted to get up and leave, but apparently, it wasn’t possible. When Natasha finally stepped inside, Bucky groaned out of frustration.
“Oh, fucking finally, Romanoff.”
Natasha didn’t even look at him.
“I was busy. What do you need?”
“A couple of signatures.” She leaned in and started to sign the papers as quickly as possible. She was never reading what she was signing because who had time to read a 25-page-long mission report? Apparently, Bucky Barnes because he had to write it from the scratch. Like his day wasn’t horrible enough... “I wish we could just go on missions, and that would be it.”
“Oh, that’s the dream, Barnes. That’s the dream.” She finally put her pen down. “I’ve been writing the mission reports for months. It’s your turn now, stop complaining.”
“I know, I know.” He accepted the defeat much easier than he normally would.
“Are you alright?”
Bucky looked up at her from his seat. Was he alright? Definitely not. He could feel a heavy knot inside his chest, burning his lungs and stomach while he was waiting for tonight. Of course, he wasn’t going to say that to Romanoff.
“I’m fine.”
“Doesn’t look like you are. Whatever it is, stop overthinking.”
“Easier said than done,” he murmured.
“Look, I know it’s not an on-off switch, but you gotta try a little bit harder. Shift your focus on something else or just face whatever makes you this… uneasy.”
“I’m gonna face it. Shifting my focus is not helping.”
Natasha gave him a suspicious look. She had no idea what this was about, but she had a feeling it might be because of the pretty girl she suggested to him. Or was it just wishful thinking? No, wishful thinking wasn’t something she did often. She was always a big realist and something was definitely up with Barnes.
“Good.” She simply answered. She knew him well enough to guess pressuring him to talk wouldn’t work on him. “We have a meeting tomorrow.”
Bucky groaned in frustration because he was just done with the mission report and now SHIELD was ready to send them in another mission again.
“We need a break.”
“This one is pretty urgent. Apparently, it’s been an undercover operation for a while now and they finally got the info they need. We’ll need to leave right after the meeting.”
“An undercover operation, huh? Interesting.”
“Be here at 9. Fury wants us all present, it’s really important.”
“Fine, fine. I’ll be there.”
***
Bucky had no idea when the video call was gonna happen, but he was already feeling too self-conscious. His face was known to most people all over the world since he was accused of killing the king of Wakanda. Then working for SHIELD became a big deal. He wasn’t sure how Bunny would react when she realized he was the Winter Soldier. He wasn’t ready for that.
>> Are you there? I’m available for that video chat.
<< I am.
>> OK. I’m calling you.
He quickly turned his laptop on, hoping he would keep the camera off for the conversation. Maybe just hearing his voice would be enough for her.
“James?” Her voice was so soft and silky. Hearing her saying his name like that made him shiver a little.
“Yes, doll?”
“Why is your camera off?” Of course, she wasn’t gonna let it go. What was he even thinking?
“I am not…” He actually didn’t know what to say. “I don’t feel comfortable…”
“You don’t feel comfortable with me? Is that what you’re saying?” She definitely sounded offended.
“No, it’s not like that. I don't feel comfortable... and you might not feel comfortable either."
“Why?”
“It’s hard to explain.” He was hoping she would just let it go.
“Try me.” She didn’t.
“Please, doll… Let’s just talk.” He was practically begging at this point.
“Jamie, if you don’t turn the camera on, I’m leaving. We can’t continue like this.” She sounded so determined, it was scary. And her calling him Jamie? A part of him melted. He had noticed how her calling him Jamie influenced him in this way. Maybe because his mom called him Jamie when he was little. Bucky came later when he was a teenager. Before that, he was Jamie at home.
“Don’t. Please, don’t.”
“Don’t what? Call you Jamie?” The defensive tone of her voice was breaking his heart.
“Don’t leave.” He quickly turned the camera on, afraid she might just leave. Then he heard her gasp. Fuck, she’s scared, he thought. “I told you it might be uncomfortable.”
She quickly pulled herself together.
“Yeah, it’s so uncomfortable looking at that pretty face.” She managed to say, trying to hide her surprise. “Or those blue eyes. Do you ever look in the mirror Bu-bunny?”
“Bunny?” He repeated confused. “You are the bunny, not me, doll.”
“If you say so.” She shrugged, licking her lips nervously. “I can’t believe you have been hiding this face all this time.” she tried to focus on him. “Why did you even think I would be uncomfortable?”
“Don’t you know… who I am?” he sounded nervous again, thinking he might have to explain his past. It’s always tedious. How can you say you were a brainwashed assassin in a less threatening way? You can’t. That was the problem.
“I know you were the Winter Soldier if that’s what you are asking.”
Oh.
“That explains the reaction.”
“No, it was because of your pretty face. Not because of your past. I’m in no position to judge you for your past. Whatever you did, you had no control over it. That’s pretty obvious.”
“How can you be so sure?” His question came instantly.
“Maybe I can tell you how and why one day, but not today.” She sounded a bit uncomfortable, so Bucky didn’t want to push her.
“Whenever you want, Bunny. I will always be here to listen.”
“Can I see your arm?” The change of topic came too suddenly. Her question caught Bucky off guard.
“Huh?”
“Your metal arm. It’s vibranium, right?” She was talking about the arm he has been trying to hide so hard. Does she really want to see that arm?
“Yes, it is.” He tried to sound as normal as possible.
“Can I see it?” She repeated eagerly.
Without saying anything, Bucky curled up his sleeve to reveal a part of his arm, still feeling a bit uncomfortable.
“Wow.” She looked stunned. “It looks… so pretty. The gold details. Wow.”
Her expression was something that can’t be faked. She was so genuinely surprised and interested. It gave Bucky the confidence he needed.
“Wanna see the rest?”
Bunny nodded excitedly, making Bucky smile. He took his henley off pretty quickly, and his metal arm, broad chest, and dog tags were on full display.
“Now I know why you only had one arm in every picture you sent me. Smart move, Sergeant Barnes.” Her eyes were still on his body, focusing on his arm. Bucky couldn’t remember the last time he felt this desired. Oh, god she definitely knows who I am, he thought. Getting called by his rank did things to him. He could feel the blood rushing to the other places. It’s not the time, it’s not the time, he tried to remind himself, yet a low groan escaped his lips before he could control it.
“So am I gonna see the rest, Sergeant?”
He gave her a confused look. When he asked that question he meant the rest of his arm, but apparently Bunny had different ideas.
“You mean…”
“The rest of your body, yes.”
“I thought we were gonna talk.” He tried to hide how much he was actually enjoying this change.
“We were, but I changed my mind.” Bucky smiled once again. Maybe I still got it, he thought.
“Because of the arm?”
“Because of you and yes, the arm too since it’s a part of you.”
“I never thought…” He couldn’t get to finish that thought.
“Your arm would be a turn-on? Well, it is. You should get used to that.”
“That’s gonna take a while,” Bucky admitted, then he looked back at the screen. “You gotta share more to see more, Bunny.”
“You are a fast learner, Sergeant. I like that.”
“I told you, you can always count on that.”
Bunny took her shirt off, instead of answering him. Bucky’s expression changed pretty quickly when he noticed she had no bra on. God, he needed to touch her, feel her and make her feel good, but he has no idea if that was even possible. His eyes focused on her nipples. How could they look this delicious over a video call? He wanted to latch on them, suck until she was a crying mess under him.
“You okay, Sarge?”
“God, Bunny, if you call me Sarge or Sergeant one more time, I will come inside my pants.”
“Noted,” she said with a teasing voice. “We wouldn’t want that, would we? I wanna see you first. Then we can make that happen.”
“I wanna see you, too. Coming hard while I tell you dirty things that turn you on.”
“Wow, the old man has a dirty mouth. Who would’ve thought?”
“Are you teasing me?” He asked with a small smile on his lips.
“I am challenging you.” Bucky gave her a suspicious look.
“To do what?”
“To talk dirty for real, James. You are ‘all talk and no action’ sometimes.”
“Oh, is that what we are doing now?” He already sounded challenged by her words. “I should’ve known you wouldn’t like a gentleman.”
“I do like a gentleman, outside the bed. In the bed, they are boring.”
“Okay, okay.” He nodded, trying to decide what to do next. “Good to know. Now, take your clothes off. I wanna see that body.”
“Is that an order, Sarge?”
“Yes, it is, Bunny.”
“And what if I don’t follow it?” Her voice was so fucking cute, Bucky did not know how she managed to be like this.
“Then you will be punished accordingly.” He didn’t even think before answering.
“Over the phone?”
“No. I will punish you in person. I will find wherever you live and I will punish you for not following a clear order.” The words spilled out of his mouth without much thought. The second he was done, he realized what he said. God, if she had got scared, she would have had every right to do so.
“That sounds more like a promise.” Her answer was unexpected and didn’t seem wary. Was she not scared of him? At all?
“It can be, but you wouldn’t wanna get punished.”
“Hmm…” She thought for a second. “Tell me, what do you want? A good girl or a bad one?”
“I want you, Bunny. Whichever you are.” His answer must be unexpected because Bunny’s expression changed for a second. She looked emotional and vulnerable, but she quickly pulled herself together.
“I am a little bit of both.”
“Then both it is.”
Bunny quickly took her remaining clothes off instead of responding, giving him a look. “Your turn.”
Bucky did the same.
“Now what do you want me to do?” She asked eagerly.
“Touch yourself for me.” She could feel how aroused he was just by hearing his voice. The full view of his erection was helping, too.
“Touch yourself first.” She sounded so demanding and Bucky couldn’t find the strength to refuse. His flesh hand wrapped around his already painful erection. “With the metal one, Sarge.”
Bucky quickly looked back at her, with confusion written all over his face.
“I promise, I am not a groupie or anything. I just think it would look so hot.”
“A groupie?”
“Google it if you don’t know what it means. I am not gonna embarrass myself by explaining.” Bucky laughed a little.
“I know what it means, Bunny. I just wasn’t sure why I would think you're a groupie.”
“Oh…” She looked at the camera for a second. “You really don’t know, do you?”
“Know what?” He was completely lost.
“That you have fans.”
The look he had was unforgettable: completely lost.
“I have fans?” He repeated mindlessly.
“Nobody told you that, huh?”
“Nope. I have fans?”
“You do.” Bunny giggled. He was really an adorable old man. “People who defend you online. I will explain more later, okay?”
“Okay.” He still sounded confused, but he let it go. The sight in front of him was more interesting than a group of people defending him.
“Metal hand, around your cock.” She reminded him.
“Right.” She watched him wrap his vibranium fingers around his erection. It was truly a sight.
“Now, your turn.”
“What do you want me to do?” She quickly asked.
“Do you have a dildo around?”
Bunny was silent for a second. “Yes?” Her tone was hesitant.
“Do you have a favorite?”
She tried not to smile. “Of course.”
“Take that one.” He sounded so confident. It was a huge turn-on.
“Wait a second.” She left the frame for a while, and Bucky could hear her walking around, looking through her stuff. Finally, she came back with it.
“You like it big,” Bucky stated after seeing the dildo. It was probably as big as his own dick. No wonder she was so into the pictures he sent.
“Is that a problem?” Her question was genuine. “I can get a smaller one.”
“Why would I want that?” He had no idea. “I want you to enjoy this. That’s why I asked for your favorite.”
Bunny’s concern vanished quickly.
“Now what, Sarge?”
“Now we both start to play with ourselves.”
“Sounds good.” Bucky watched her brushing her fingers against her clit while letting out delicious, low moans. It was nothing too pornographic, and he could feel more blood rushing to his lower side. He started to work on himself pretty slowly with his vibranium hand since it was new to him. He never used his metal fingers before so he was trying to be careful.
“Use lube.”
“Huh?” Bucky looked like a fish out of water.
“Use lube, it will make it better.” Her fingers were still working on her clit and lips as she spoke. “Or whatever you have. A cream works too, I guess.”
“I have lube, doll. How do you think my dick survived you for this long?”
She giggled again, and all Bucky wanted to do was kiss her hard. Her lips, her nipples, her wet pussy. Anything… he just needed to taste her.
“You don’t even need lube, do you?” he asked, trying to distract himself.
“Nope.” She moved her finger away from her pussy, just to show him how wet she is, and the response she got was a loud moan.
“Fuck.” He took a deep breath. “Fuck, fuck, fuck.” It was such a raw reaction, and Bunny loved every second of it. “All for me?”
“All for you, Sarge.”
His fingers started to work faster, and thanks to the lube, it was much better than he expected. He was surprised at how the metal felt against his cock. Definitely didn’t feel like flesh, but it was good. Really good since he could actually move his metal hand faster.
“Can I put this in me?” She asked Bucky for permission to finally use the dildo, and god, he had to stop for a second, not to come instantly.
“Yes. Yes, you can.” He breathed out, struggling to form sentences at this point, but he managed it.
She pushed the dildo inside her effortlessly and let out a loud moan as she moved it in further. Bucky took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down. There is no way you are not gonna come before her. He was talking to himself. Just calm down.
"Ride that dildo, Bunny. Imagine it's me."
“You want this to be over soon, huh?” Her teasing tone helped him relax. He liked that he wasn’t alone in this.
“You gotta meet me in the middle, Bunny. Otherwise, it’s gonna be embarrassing.”
She didn’t tease or challenge him this time. She just listened to his order and started to ride the dildo as she would ride him. Her movements, the noises she made… She was making things even harder. He felt like he lost control of his fingers. He wanted to slow down, try to come with her, but his metal hand wasn’t listening to him.
“F-fuck.” He breathed out. “I’m- I’m gonna come.” He sounded so pained like he was disappointing her.
“I’m gonna come, too.” Her response was quick. “Sstop holding yourself back.” She was panting, involuntarily showing him how close she actually was.
“Shit. Pinch your nipple for me if you like that.” His metal hand was moving fast on his cock, it was oozing with precum already.
“I do.” She was out of breath already. “I do.” Pinching her nipple was enough to push her over the edge. “Oh, fuck…” When the first wave of her orgasm hit her, he could see how strong it was. “Fuck, Bucky…” The moment she said his name, he knew he was gone. There was no way he could hold back. “This feels so good. So fucking good.”
“God, Bunny.” He let out a loud moan as his come hit the laptop screen. He gasped as he continued to move his hand until he felt painfully overstimulated.
He had no idea how long the silence between them lasted.
“James?” He heard her silky voice before opening his eyes back up.
“I’m here, Bunny.” She smiled in response. She could see he was still there, but she wasn’t gonna say that.
“That was amazing.” Bunny looked so blissed out.
“Tell me about it.” He shook his head like he couldn’t believe how strong that orgasm was.
He heard Bunny taking another deep breath while looking back at him.
“Look, I know this is not the time…” Bunny sounded more serious than before. The tone got his attention back to her.
“Tell me.” He suddenly sounded so demanding.
“The timing is horrible.”
“I don’t care.” He smiled, trying to assure her.
“I won’t be around for a while.” His face dropped when he heard her words. “That’s why I wanted to talk to you tonight. I won’t be online or posting new content.”
"Is something wrong?" He sounded so worried, so panicked. As crazy as it might have been, he didn't want to lose her, especially after this.
“No, no, no.” She quickly assured him. “It's something I have to do. I was working on something for a long time and now it might come to an end. Which is a good thing since that's what I was trying to achieve. I just need to deal with it, then I will be back and I'll explain everything, okay?” Bucky nodded. “Just know that I'll be busy, but I'll come back, okay? No need to worry about me.”
“I will always worry about you.” That was the truth. Even if he knew she was fine, not hearing from her would worry him. “Thank you for telling me.”
***
The next morning, Bucky woke up feeling much better than he ever felt since he was a free man. Last night, things exceeded his expectations. He noticed how much he was overthinking everything, how he never thought she'd be so okay with who he was. He never thought she would be still attracted to him after seeing him. He wasn’t delusional enough to think he had an ugly face. The problem was the things that face was associated with and, yes, he was still convinced she was way out of his league. But she didn’t seem to care, and that was all that mattered to him.
He quickly got ready. His morning routine was simple, so he could just leave in half an hour: a quick shower, a simple breakfast, and putting on appropriate clothes were enough. After he was done with the essentials, he found a bit of time to send Bunny a good morning message. She might not be able to respond, since she told him she was gonna be busy these days, but he still felt like doing it. And after last night, he had no intention to refrain from following his wishes. Not anymore.
But when he opened the app, he was simply shocked, horrified even… Because Bunny was gone. Completely gone. Her account was deactivated, and only their old messages were still there.
The panic scattered throughout his body like rapid fire, spreading from his chest and burning everything on its path. He had no idea what to do. He didn't have her number or any social media accounts if she had any. He didn’t even know where she lived. Yes, sure, Bunny told him she was going to be away for a while and wouldn't be able to share anything, but deleting her whole account? That was completely unexpected and alarming. He rubbed his face with both of his hands, trying to figure out a way to make sure she was fine.
Slowly, the overthinking returned and took complete control of him. What if she just played it cool yesterday but wanted to vanish after learning who he actually was? The Winter Soldier was a terrifying figure, he would have not blamed her if that had been the case, yet he would have felt betrayed and disappointed. He tried to think of a moment or a small detail that showed she was just trying to act her way out of a dangerous situation, but nothing came to his mind. She was surprised, of course, but after that initial shock, she was back to her normal self. She even wanted to see him more intimately. Was it because she didn’t feel safe anymore? Could she possibly act so flawlessly and show no fear while trying to get away? A part of him didn't believe that couldn’t be true. She was one of the most authentic people he met, even though they did not actually meet in person. That was why he was pulled towards her this much. Another part of him thought this is basically her job. She had to look convincing enough, but looking and acting were completely two different things, and Bucky wasn’t sure of anything anymore. He was so focused on trying to find a logical explanation for everything that he almost didn't hear his phone ring.
When Bucky grabbed back his phone, he saw the name Sam Wilson on the screen. He didn’t feel like answering, but Sam was stubborn as usual. He called him back again in a second, and Bucky had no choice but to answer at the end.
“Hey, Buck. You ready buddy? I’m on my way and I can give you a lift.”
Bucky made an unintelligible sound, not knowing how to answer. He already forgot about the meeting and the time.
“Please, tell me you are ready. The meeting is in half an hour.”
“I am.” He finally managed to say something back. His own voice sounded robotic and the words were forced, but he had to go through this day to find a way to reach Bunny. Maybe he could ask for Fury’s help to locate her. It would take a lot of convincing, but he would do it for her. To make sure she was safe and sound. To do that, he had to go to this briefing.
“Okay, I’ll be there in 5.”
***
As Bucky and Sam finally arrived at the SHIELD headquarters, Bucky muttered a simple thank you. They didn't talk much during the ride, which wasn’t unusual, yet Sam suspected something was wrong. Bucky was usually calm and collected. He wouldn't engage in small talk or chat about random topics, but this time he seemed nervous. Sam wanted to ask what was wrong, but after all the time they spent together, he knew it was better to just wait for a sign. That was always more effective. Bucky would recoil into his shell like a freaking turtle if you made a move too soon, and that was the last thing they needed.
As for Bucky, he couldn't stop wondering about all the possibilities in the world and what he should do next. He would have to talk to Fury privately, ask for help, and get out of this mission. After that, he would go on whatever mission they decided to throw his way. No problem. None at all. Just let me be sure she is fine.
While still thinking about the plan in his mind, Bucky found an empty spot in the meeting room and sank down. He was checking his phone regularly to see if there was anything from Bunny or if maybe her profile would be back up, but no. There was nothing at all, and his worry was growing every second. He had no idea how he was supposed to go through this meeting at all.
“Ladies and gentlemen, we are about to end one of the biggest undercover operations in the history of SHIELD.” Fury’s voice got the attention of everyone in the room. “We are going to hit HYDRA where it hurts the most. Innocents will be saved by cutting HYDRA’s biggest financial income. It doesn't get any better than this.” Fury talking about HYDRA got Bucky out of his own head for a second. “This operation has been going on for quite some time and there’s no one better than Agent Elvisa to explain the details before we get to action.” Fury turned his eyes to the side, moving his hand up to introduce the mysterious agent. What Bucky didn't expect was to see Bunny, in flesh and blood, right in front of him. She was wearing a generic SHIELD uniform, her hair neatly tied up in a ponytail, looking composed.
“Thank you, Director Fury.” Hearing her silky voice made Bucky realize he wasn’t dreaming. His eyes widened when he realized he was really standing there, looking perfect in that ugly outfit. He could feel a hole forming in his stomach while Agent Elvisa started to explain the details. She was actively trying to avoid meeting his eyes while talking, showing some statistics and the essential, but Bucky couldn’t hear anything. His ears were ringing.
Since Bunny kept avoiding the eye contact with him, Bucky’s glance turned over to Natasha. She was the one who suggested her, after all. Did she know about this? The woman who he thought was a complete stranger was actually a SHIELD agent. There was no way Natasha did not know this. Was this all an elaborate prank? Maybe orchestrated by Natasha. That would make perfect sense.
Bucky understood that HYDRA was making a lot of money from their human trafficking network, and SHIELD was about to destroy it. He would have loved to focus more on the details since this would have been a personal case for him in another context. He was one of their victims after all. Yet his palms were sweating as he thought about confronting her. Even when he tried hard to understand, his brain didn’t compute any of the information she was giving. It was too loud, too uncomfortable. He felt thirsty and nauseous at the same time.
After the meeting was over, Bucky jolted out of his seat to catch her. He needed a second to talk to her, privately, to understand what the fuck was going on. He thought he deserved that much explanation before going on another mission after everything that happened between them.
She was talking to someone, but Bucky didn’t pay attention to their conversation. He stopped right next to her, invading all of her personal space without considering how it might look from the outside.
“We need to talk.” His voice was so harsh, it made her flinch. She looked up and met his eyes for the first time, and he could clearly see she was uncomfortable.
“She was…” The man she was talking to tried to interject, but Bucky was having none of it.
“I’m talking to Agent Elvisa.” God, the way he said her name was stone-cold. It sounded like he wanted to spit her name out. He subtly grabbed her arm. “We need to talk. Right now.”
***
Bucky’s hand didn’t leave her arm until they were tucked inside the closest empty office. He was trying to control himself, but it was so hard when a million questions were running through his head. Yet, he managed to choose one to ask.
“Why?” His eyes were like two daggers.
“Why what?” She managed to say back, a little terrified.
“Why did you do this to me?” The way Bucky asked the question broke her heart. She could hear the disappointment, the pain and betrayal in his voice. “I just need to know why you did this to me.”
“What are you talking about? What did I do to you?” She looked completely clueless, and it hurt Bucky even more. “Look I know…” She tried to explain, but he didn’t let her.
“Was this a joke? Did Natasha put you up to this?” He talked so fast and harshly. “Or was this a bet between co-workers?” She was silent. Completely silent. Trying to understand what he was talking about.
“You think I played with you?” She asked the question like she couldn’t believe him.
“Didn’t you, Agent Elvisa?” Again, her code name sounded so harsh on his lips. She wasn’t Bunny anymore.
“Playing with you was never my intention.”
“But you did it anyway.” God, he sounded so broken, on the verge of a breakdown.
“I didn’t even know I was talking to you until last night, Bucky.” She was getting emotional, but Bucky wasn’t in the state to notice it. “I could never…”
“You could never what? Make a fool of me? Break my heart? What did you think would happen when you decided to show up and give a presentation in that freaking room?” He raised his hand to point toward the general direction of the meeting room.
“I didn’t know you would be here!” She finally snapped and started to yell back. “I didn’t know I was talking to you until last night! Did you even listen to me back there?”
Bucky looked all lost, trying to understand why that would matter right now.
“I was on an undercover mission all this time. It had nothing to do with you! You think I made a fake account and started creating content just to mess with you? Why would I do that?”
“I… I don’t know.” He didn’t know anything. All he came up with was a list of possibilities.
“I have been doing this for months! I’m trying to catch those bastards, trying to look convincing enough and make them pay for what they did!” She stopped for a second, trying to collect herself. She didn’t want to cry. Not right then. “You think you are so important that I would create a whole ass account instead of just coming and asking you out?”
Her question silenced him for a second, making him wonder what the last sentence meant.
“What did you just say?”
Right at that moment, someone knocked on the door and stuck their head inside.
“Sergeant Barnes, we have to leave in 10 minutes.”
He didn’t even look their way. “I’m in the middle of something!” It was so harsh yet attractive.
“I know, but Director Fury…”
“Just tell him I need 5 more minutes.” The determination in his tone shook the agent and he left without saying anything in return. As soon as Bucky heard the door close, he repeated his question.
“What did you just say?”
“I don’t know what kind of sick game is going on, but I’m assuming you know I have a crush on you. Maybe Nat told you. I.. don’t know, but I would never do something like this. Not to you, not to anyone. I’d just ask you out and get rejected with pride.”
“You had a crush on me?” He couldn’t believe what she was saying.
“You… didn’t know?”
“No.” They both looked so confused.
“I assumed that you did.” She awkwardly looked around.
“Nope.”
The door was opened without a knock this time and both of them turned their heads simultaneously.
“Buck-” Sam couldn’t even finish his sentence. The double death glare startled him.
“For god's sake! I just need 5 minutes of privacy before I go there and fight. Is that too much to ask?”
“Okay, man, calm down. I’ll tell Fury.” He quickly looked at Bunny and then at Bucky before closing the door behind him. Both Bucky and Bunny turned their eyes to each other.
“Okay, look… I didn’t play with you.” She started to explain. “No one put me up on a mission to mess with you. I don’t know if this is a twisted game of fate or something else, but I didn’t know you would be involved in this operation, okay?”
“It’s Romanoff’s doing.” He finally put two plus two together, and she nodded slowly. It made sense to her, too. Then they heard Fury talking outside, and they knew that the time was running out.
“We don’t have time for this.” She stated while running her hand through her hair. “Just know that I was going to explain everything after the operation. That’s why I said what I said yesterday.”
Before he could answer her, the door opened once again. No knocking, no hesitation. Bucky was about to yell at them not to interrupt once again, but Fury was standing on the door sill, looking uneasy.
“Barnes, we have no time for…” His eyes darted between both of them. “...whatever this is. We have to leave before it’s too late.”
“Fine.” He finally responded after a short while. “I’m coming, but this conversation is not over, Agent Elvisa.”
“I’ll be waiting, Sergeant Barnes.”
Next Chapter >>>
***
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