#IS ALSO!! SO IMPORTANT!! SHE'S TAKING A HUGE PERSONAL EMOTIONAL RISK BY GETTING ATTACHED AND ADMITTING IT | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

dreamkidddream · 3 years

Note

I’m the Doll!MC Anon and I just wanna say I’m so glad that you enjoy a soft/delicate!MC and I really didn’t expect it to get so much love!

Since I kinda want to be evil and see the boys be overprotective, can I request hc’s of them seeing Doll!MC getting hurt by some lesser demon that bumps her into the ground and she gets a bruise? 🌚

Omg Doll Anon I wasn’t expecting it to get so much love either (here’s the original Doll!MC HCs if anyone wants to read)!! So I actually had your request saved for when I was done with the prompt special bc it’s so good, so I decided to combine them and I have definitely been waiting to write this 😈😈 Reader is gender neutral!

CW: mention of blood (nothing graphic) and spoilers for Lesson 16 (Lucifer, Mammon, Beel, and Belphie’s part)

The Brothers and Diavolo with Doll!MC who Gets Hurt

Lucifer

Okay whoever is dumb enough to hurt you in front of him deserves this 100%

The air around this man is already more than intimidating, so whoever tries this is a poor, stupid soul

When he saw you fall down the stairs, he felt his stomach turn. He already caught you before you could injure yourself further, but after seeing the blood coming down your face, the damage was already done

Now, Lucifer is the brother who always has control over himself and what he does. But, we also know that how his temper can get, especially when it comes to his family

This demon is dumb enough to push you but not dumb enough to crack a smile in front of him, especially with how tense Lucifer is getting right now

He sat you up and tried to remember some first aid techniques to stop the bleeding. You’re on the verge of losing consciousness, but you’re okay right now. He’ll take you home, but first-

His glare is making the demon freeze in place right now, and the anger radiating off of him is petrifying

How dare- how dare this fool harm you, in front of him no less?! Did they think that he wouldn’t do anything? That Lucifer, the Avatar of Pride, one of the strongest demons to ever grace the Devildom, would just idly stand by and let this happen?

He’s stalking towards them, and he can feel his fangs showing and his diamond appearing on his forehead, growling out how they will pay for this-

But he’s stopped by Lord Diavolo, who was shocked by the scene. You’re unconscious, and Lucifer has this poor student hanging in the air by their uniform, claws ready to slice through them. Needless to say, he understands why his close friend is upset, but for everyone’s safety he should just take you home like planned

You thought Lucifer was a helicopter parent before? You haven’t seen NOTHING yet

He would start inviting you more to his room to sleep in his bed while he works away, and it started happening so much that he didn’t even ask anymore and started expecting you to always be in there

So instead of him being glued by your side, you’re glued to his. It’s obvious that he can’t let you out of his sight without something happening (again), so hope you’re ready to see experience Lucifer’s daily routine from sunrise to sunset and a whole new set of rules. Basically playing follow the leader, but with a lot more handholding and kisses

You had to practically beg to be back into the kitchen, and he only relented when he could be the one to supervise you, and even then he still didn’t want to hold anything sharp or be near anything that could injure you (which is pretty much everything)

The main one to put a stop to his brothers’ schemes, handing out harsher punishments than before each time they try to involve you. This man is not playing any games with anyone

You know he means well, he was already overprotective from the start, and this is just his way of showing that he cares about you. You can tell every time he gives you that soft look in his eyes, and the regret that he shows every time he catches sight of your bruise. He may not like to be vulnerable, but he couldn’t hide his emotions from you too long. You’re like a weakness to him, one that he isn’t against indulging in

And he hasn’t forgotten about that student, oh no. He made sure to have a nice lengthy chat with them when you both returned to RAD. You didn’t question it when he informed you that the student had been rightfully punished and no longer an issue, and you tried to ignore the red dots splattered on his shoes, or that sadistic gleam in his eyes...

Mammon

This isn’t happening, this isn’t happening, this isn’t happening-

The blood is pouring from your head, and your eyes are closing too fast for him, and his heart stops

You look lifeless, like when Belphie killed you, when he was too late to save you-

He’ll never forget that image, it’s drilled deep into his mind, forever a reminder of his failure to protect you. And now he failed again-

This demon is gloating about this, and that’s when he snaps

He was already in his demon form and beating the life out of them when he was restrained. Many people were shocked that he was capable of this, that Mammon the scumbag, Mammon the dummy, Mammon the punching bag was capable enough to be this dangerous, this deadly. He’s the second born after all, and he’s the strongest right under Lucifer himself, and he holds a lot in

He could- he would do a lot more because they deserve it, but just seeing you so still, it snaps him out of it. You’re more important to him than getting his anger out, and you’re the one he needs to be focusing on right now. But rest asssured, this isn’t over

You thought he was attached to you before? He is glued to your side 24/7 and will not be leaving anytime soon. Ever since you woke up he never let go of you, calling you “his human” and just hugging you tight

Also if you have to go down the stairs you guys are FLYING no exceptions! The stairs are the devil in his eyes (how ironic) and he will not be risking anything with you

If you guys aren’t out and about under his careful and watchful eye (and I mean very careful, he’s like your very own bodyguard but with a lot more growling and snapping on strangers than usual), then you’re in his room doing whatever. Watching movies, playing cards and somehow beating him every time (he swears that he isn’t letting you win! Lies), whatever you wanna do. As long as you’re with him, giggling and safe, he’s happy and stress free

You mean so much to Mammon MC, he can’t even tell you if he tries. Under his tsundere traits, he really loves you, like really loves you! He’s just so scared of being rejected and losing you a second time. But now that he knows you’ll always be there for him, he’s going to do the same for you (but he already was even if you didn’t like him) He hates looking at that bruise right now, but it’s set as a reminder to not let something happen to you again

Also, another thing that people forget about Mammon is that he can talk to crows. So it wasn’t much to have them track down the person who caused you pain, and it didn’t take long for him to find them either. He thinks that the aftermath will set a good lesson for everyone else who continues to underestimate him when it comes to you: don’t

Leviathan

See, this is why he never leaves his safe haven AKA his room!

After he saw your head hit the ground hard, he was freaking out. He doesn’t know what to do, he wasn’t prepared for this! He tried shaking you to keep you awake, but your eyes were steady closing

Everything is happening in slow motion. You’re slumped over on the ground while the person who did it is laughing at him

If anything, the person who did it should be the one on the ground, not you, not his Henry. It’s not fair, it’s not fair, it’s not fair!

The demon stopped laughing when their windpipe was getting crushed by the second. They couldn’t even try to loosen the grip, Levi’s tail is rather strong, and so is he. He is the third strongest out of his family and the Grand Admiral of the Navy, yet people tend to forget that

Everyone knows how bad Levi’s tantrums can be, but this isn’t just a tantrum, it’s much worse. Had the brothers not intervene, he would have done much worse than summoning Lotan (which he was on the brink of doing anyway)

When you did wake up, he was so upset. Of course he let this happen, he’s just a worthless otaku who couldn’t even keep his crush safe-

OMG why are you hugging him and patting his head?! Quit it- well wait, this does feel kinda nice...Ugh you’re such a normie! Getting hurt so easily and still trying to put a smile on his face. But it does make him feel better

He rarely left his room before, and you guys are definitely not leaving it now. It’s like having a sleepover, but it never ends. That sounds great, right MC? Endless marathons of TSL and other anime, co-op video games, trying on his cosplay outfits that he made (some even made just for you and he needs to cover that bruise somehow), it’s going to be so fun and you’ll be safe with him! Who wouldn’t want that??

We all know that Levi is very self conscious. He knows that he isn’t confident like Lucifer and Mammon, or attractive like Asmo, or smart like Satan or Belphie, or physically fit like Beel, he knows. But every time you listen to him ramble on about this new anime show that he wants you guys to binge, or when he rants about a stupid move his teammate did in an online match, he feels valued. He feels loved. And while it’s hard for him to express his feelings, it’s no doubt in his mind that you’re important to him, and that he’s beyond happy that someone like you is his best friend

One day he’ll get the courage to say those three words, but he hopes that you already know with everything that he does for you

For example, Levi is an aquatic demon, and he has the ability to communicate with all types of sea creatures. Granted, he knows right from wrong, but in his eyes he’s taking care of the problem. So it wouldn’t be a huge issue if he used them to clean up the remaining mess of said problem, right? I mean, his venom can only do so much, and he doesn’t need anyone questioning him, and Lotan does get hungry...

Satan

He could only see red. Both from his anger surfacing and from the fact that you’re bleeding

He had his claws wrapped around the neck of the one responsible before they could even think about running. This- this filth dared tried to escape after he hurt you? And they thought that Satan would just let them get away with it?

They must forget that he’s the Avatar of Wrath, the one who doesn’t show mercy

He just kept pounding the demon into the ground, over and over and over and over. He didn’t even care about the blood splatter it was leaving on the lockers or on him

He was this close to finishing them off when he heard you call out for him, and it took everything in him to drop them. He squeezed their neck a final time, not even close to being satisfied with the whimper he heard, and growled out a promise of that he will find them and will make sure that they suffer before he threw them down. They better count themselves lucky that they get to crawl away in one piece (for now), because had you not been there-

Oh, he is seething the more he thinks about it

But you bleeding is a distraction from it, even if it is making his stomach turn, it’s helping him know that he needs to help you now

He didn’t have to let his brothers know as they came to see what the commotion was, and Lucifer (even if he didn’t want to believe it himself) was anxious that he was the cause of it. But after he saw the hold he had on you and another demon barely clinging onto life, he knew otherwise

It was decided that you two going home would be the best course of action (which it didn’t matter to Satan, you both weren’t going to stay here whether it was demanded or not), and he calmed down enough to properly treat you

You didn’t leave his room for the rest of the day, and he even gave up his bed for you to lie in so that he can do some research. The human body is a complicated thing, but Satan can learn it like the back of his hand just for you. So just go ahead and rest for now MC- or maybe not, you might have a concussion according to this book and if you do he needs to monitor your condition!

Even after you were healed, he didn’t let you out of his sight and daily checkups were a must. Dr. Satan is in the building!

You eventually moved back into your room (you would have stayed longer but he’s a little nervous with his towering stacks of books and doesn’t want anymore accidents), but he practically moved in with you with how much he comes over, either falling asleep at your desk reading a book or falling asleep in your chair right next to your bed

Very reluctant to have you around stairs, it makes the hairs on his neck stand up. He’ll let you go down the stairs ONLY if you’re holding his hand. If you’re upset with those conditions (spoiler alert you’re not), then you better be ready to learn some teleportation spells (but even then he’s still not leaving your side)

He doesn’t hold his temper back with the others when it comes to you for the time being. If he even senses that Mammon, Asmo, or Levi is coming to you with something that can cause trouble, he’s growling at them to leave you alone, horns slowly coming out and tail whipping furiously

However, he tries not to lash out in front of you. He realizes that he lost control with that demon, and how it could have terrified you had you been fully conscious, but he doesn’t want you to think that he’s just a monster. He wants you to continue to treat him like you do now, and not have the image of bashing someone’s bloody body on the floor repeatedly

Speaking of bashing someone, Satan made well on his promise of coming back. The demon thought that avoiding coming back to school would save them, but Satan is a genius, and has many associates that he can sweet talk to get what he wants. It didn’t take much to figure out where they went, and he made sure to get out all of his pent-up frustrations from that fateful day. He felt better when he came home, but he needed to take a shower before he went to see you...

Besides from that, he does appreciate the peace that you do bring him. You just have this aura around you that’s so calming to him, and he needs to steal you away more he realizes

Also you make better cat-themed desserts than the cafe and he can’t risk Beel eating them all again

Asmodeus

He’s shook, and not in the good way

He just had your hand in his, complaining about how you cuticles look so good and his is lacking and how guys have to go to the nail salon after class, and then your hand is jerked from his, your form at the bottom of the stairs

The blood staining your uniform is alarming, but he can’t worry about that now. He’s trying to keep you talking, but you’re already on the verge of passing out

“MC, you can’t sleep yet! We have plans to go to the nail salon remember? And I need you awake so we can talk about what matching color we’re getting! So what color should we get now, MC? MC? MC!”

He’s trying to keep himself from panicking, but he can’t help it! You’re suppose to be smiling and laughing with you, loving him, but you’re unconscious on the ground, and he’s scared

Quickly dials Lucifer and tells him the whole situation, and he’s surprised to find himself blinking back tears

The demon who did this is long gone by the time Lucifer and Diavolo come, but he remembers the face, and he has something exciting planned when he comes face to face with them

Obviously you have to go home, but Asmo is so distraught that he has to go home with you. But when you wake up, prepare to be tackled to the bed with him crying his eyes out. All you can do is try to comfort him and tell him that okay, giving him little kisses on his cheek

But now that the sadness is out of the way (all this crying and worrying is causing him stress wrinkles), it’s time for a makeover/stress relief!

Fashion shows, makeovers, painting nails, face masks, the whole nine yards. All in the comfort of his dazzling room!

It’ll make you both feel and look better, and honestly you two need that right now. It also gives him the opportunity to cover that unappealing bruise. Your beauty outshines it but it’ll be best to cover it up for your and his sake (mainly his)

Every time Asmo sees your bruise, he gets upset and he’s tired of being reminded of what happened. He knows that he’s only loved for his looks, his vanity, but you see more in him than that

You’re...you’re the first person that loves him for him entirely, not because of his features. And when he tells you that he loves you, he honestly means it. He would have never thought he would fall so deep for someone, let alone a human, but...he’s glad that it’s you. He’s happy that it’s you

Which is why he wants to keep you safe and injury-free. Plus, your skin is too pretty and doll-like to be roughed up!

You guys still go out of course, he just has a better eye on you now. This one incident isn’t going to hold him back for picking out new cute outfits for you!

And don’t think he forgot about that demon who caused all of this in the first place. He actually waited by their locker, and convinced them to come with him. But what should Asmo do with them? He could always have them steal Beel’s food, annoy Lucifer, say something horrible about Ruri-Chan, the possibilities are endless! As long as they don’t cause him to get dirty, of course

Or maybe they should do something so severe that they have no reason than to leave RAD forever, or even leave the Devildom forever, depending on how far he’s willing to take it. He’ll do anything if it means you’re safe and he gets to keep you all to himself

Beelzebub

He thought it was an accident at first, you get so excited about things that you stumble over your own feet sometimes, but he’s always there to catch you or pick you up

You keep saying that you’re okay as he’s holding onto you, and after he sits you up he’s confused because he smells blood. His heart is beating a little quicker, and you’re not talking anymore, and your head is drooping, and that’s when he sees the blood running down the side of your face

He’s starting to panic, and he’s so scared that if he tightens his hold against you he’ll just make things worse, that he’ll just hurt you more. But he needs to go find Lucifer, he needs to get you help, you’re feeling so light in his arms and it reminds him of the Celestial War when he witnessed his sister dying-

He hears someone snickering behind him, and that’s when he loses his temper

You’re a part of his family now, someone that he loves and cares for more than he can describe, and they did this to you? Someone who wouldn’t even squish a bug, someone who made him late night snacks without even asking, always there to give him hugs after his games no matter how sweaty, someone that put his family back together and they did this to you?

Lucifer and Mammon struggled to hold him back after they found the demon flung through the wall, laying under the rubble. Beel just kept growling, fangs bared and wings buzzing. He won’t stop trying to get out of their hold, and he keeps inching closer and closer to the demon, and it’s only a matter of time before he finishes what he started

You were already in the infirmary getting treated, and Beel isn’t calming down anytime soon so you were both escorted home

You woke up to Beel upset and pouting. He’s so worried about you that he couldn’t even eat. Beelzebub could not eat, that’s how you knew this was a something serious

Poor Beel was so terrified of hurting you himself that he failed to protect you from the people that do want to hurt you, or worse

But this won’t happen again, he swears, both to you and himself. Move over Mammon, Beel is officially your new bodyguard!

Wherever you go, Beel is right behind you, literally. He’s like your shadow, just bigger and a lot more...menacing. Also isn’t taking any chances with Mammon’s schemes, just carrying you away before he can even open his mouth about another get rich quick plan

Speaking of carrying, you are not allowed to walk down the stairs anymore. As soon as you step near some you find yourself in his arms like it’s nothing. Both at home and at school, it doesn’t matter to him

Also he’s very cautious to have you around people besides his brothers, and the exchange students (but he’s still hesitant about Solomon, anyone who can cook food like him is automatically getting the side eye)

Also you practically moved in with the twins, and it’s nothing compared to the sleepovers before. Belphie sleeps easier, Beel’s stomach is satisfied (eating your homemade sweets with you is better than everything combined at Hell’s Kitchen, and trust me he knows) he feels all warm inside, and you’re protected. Everyone’s happy!

Beel is a sweet guy, just don’t come in between his family or his food. After that whole incident with the demon, everyone has come to understand that, especially after seeing just how much damage he caused both to the demon and the school in so little time...

Belphegor

If he was sleepy before, he’s completely awake now

You’re holding the side of your head, and he can see the blood seeping through your fingers, groaning in pain. You keep trying to say that you’re okay, but your words are starting to slur and he’s getting nervous, he’s getting scared

It’s reminding him too much of his worst mistake, of what he did to you, when he murdered-

No. He doesn’t need to be thinking about that right now, especially when the person who did this is bragging about it while your body is slumped over. Right there, he knows what exactly needs to be done

Belphie was already in front of them before they even registered it, and didn’t give him any time to form an excuse. His claws were already at their throat, inching deeper and deeper the more they swallowed

“I should just slit your throat now, it’ll be easy and not a lot of work. But you deserve much worse than that. You’ll wish I did by the end of this.”

After a tap to the demon’s forehead, they just collapsed before him, unmoving. He didn’t even look down when he stepped over them (or rather stepped on them) to get to you. You’re passed out, but still breathing. You can’t stay here like this, and he refuses to tell Diavolo or Lucifer. He’ll figure something out, maybe Satan has some books in his room on what to do...

When you woke up, you found yourself wrapped in blankets and Belphie sleeping beside you, arms wrapped tight. You were confused, when did you get home? You remember walking with him down the stairs, but everything was blurry after that. What happen-

“You’re always thinking so hard MC, you’ll never be able to get good rest if you keep that up. But Satan did say to check on you every couple of hours, so I guess it’s fine. And quit touching your head!”

“Oh, sorry Belphie, I didn’t mean to-”

“Tch, how annoying...”

But he’s lying. Even as he’s carefully re-wrapping the bandages, he’s relieved that you’re awake, that your eyes are still full of life, not like the dullness that he saw that fateful night

When Lucifer finds you he is not happy with Belphie, but he doesn’t care and tells him that everything is already under control and that he isn’t needed. Belphie didn’t miss the scowl that he sent his way, but he just smirked in response. You didn’t need Lucifer as Belphie is already taking care of you, as it should be

You know how he always carries around his favorite pillow? Yeah he’s doing that with you basically, minus the carrying. You’re practically attached to his side, wherever he goes you’re either right there with him or in his room, which is mainly just you two lazing around or sleeping (as usual)

Honestly, the only demons who he’s okay with disturbing you two is Beel and maybe Satan. Beel because that’s his twin and it’s his room too, and Satan only if he’s checking on you medically or if he has some new ideas to mess with Lucifer. Everyone else is just trying to bother you and be annoying, and you don’t need that

Of course he blames himself for this! How is he suppose to keep you safe, to make up for his mistake? But then it clicks

It’s not the fact that he’s weak, people think that he’s weak. But he realizes that this is fine, he’ll use that to his advantage.

Diavolo is upset and Lucifer is running out of excuses for him, but Belphie just plays stupid and says he can’t remember how to remove it (even though he does). Let the demon lose some more sleep until they learn their lesson, whether it’s from the constant nightmares or from sleep deprivation trying to stay awake to avoid said nightmares. He’ll remove it when he feels like it, and he doesn’t see that happening anytime soon

Let people think the Avatar of Sloth is weak, that he’s not a threat, and he can show them exactly how wrong they are. Better yet, this demon can be the perfect example, and many more if they become a bother to you (and him)

You’re too nice MC, too delicate. You treat him so good, like he’s not a demon, like he’s not the monster who took your life, and he has to thank you for that somehow. He feels like whatever he does won’t be enough for the kindness you give him, but protecting you from others who used to be like him could be a good start

Also now he can hog all of your head pats and cuddles for himself, and he doesn’t feel bad at all. Everyone else had their time with you when he was locked up, so he’s finally got the opportunity to be selfish

Diavolo

First of all...this demon is dumb enough to harm you in front of him??? The Demon LORD???? The FUTURE KING OF HELL??!

They have more than just a death wish

It all happened so quick, he just crossed paths with you in the hallways and started to ask about your day (and maybe invite you for a small tea date after school) but he didn’t even get the chance to open his mouth

One second he saw your eyes light up and hand extended to excitedly wave, then he saw your fragile form tumbling down the stairs

Barbatos was soon called to his side as Diavolo saw the red coating his palms and you barely staying conscious, trying to say that you’re okay and not to worry

See...he feared that this would be a problem. While Diavolo is a very kind and understanding ruler, there are still some demons out there who think he’s too lenient, too soft. But that’s where people are mistaken. Diavolo is kind, but do not mistake his kindness for weakness

He felt his anger rising, his demeanor starting to crack, but he set aside his emotions. You’re his first priority, and he needs to make sure that you’re okay! He’s still a ruler, and you’re his responsibility (and first love)

However, he made sure that Barbatos took the demon who did this and kept them in the dungeon until he was done treating you. He won’t let this go unpunished, he can’t and he won’t

You’re an important part of the exchange program, and you’re most important to him, and he’s upset with himself that you got hurt. You’re so delicate, and you don’t deserve any of this happening to you, but what can he do? While he trusts the brothers to keep you safe, he wants to keep an eye on you personally, but how?

Then it struck him

You liked to stay in the castle, always smiling and having fun whenever you spent time with him there, so why not relocate you there?? It’ll be like an extended sleepover/retreat with just you two!! You guys can do all of your favorite activities and won’t have to worry about going home because you won’t have to leave!! Why didn’t he think of this sooner?!

The brothers are very upset with this incident, and even more so when he announced this. Diavolo decided that your condition needed to be monitored closely, and since he’s the person directly in charge of the exchange program AND the ruler over the Devildom, there was no room to argue. You weren’t going to stay in the castle forever, just until he deemed it right to return to the HoL

Which would be...some time soon, maybe. He’s not really worried about that now, his number 1 concern is you after all!

You’re getting the royal treatment, literally. This is the chance that he gets to pamper you without interruptions and he is not wasting it!

You kept trying to convince him that you’re fine, but he wasn’t hearing any of it, especially after he sees the nasty bruise that was left. “MC, please! You still need to rest. How about I have Barbatos bring us some tea to help, and we can even have the royal staff bring us some outfits of your choosing if you like? Oo, we can even have our portrait painted!”

“Dia, I promise that I’m fine, you have more things to worry about than me-”

“Nonsense, MC. You’re what’s important to me, now and always. Don’t ever forget that.”

Even finished it with a hand kiss, UGH he really is a Prince Charming

Once you did return to RAD bruise free, Diavolo, being the gentleman that he is, walked with you everywhere in the beginning. Coming into the building, walking to class, lunch, even to the student council meeting, he was by your side. But he couldn’t avoid his duties forever (unfortunately), but he always made up for lost time afterwards

You never realized that when he wasn’t with you, someone else always was. Whether it be Lucifer who miraculously had spare time, or Barbatos who decided to escort you back to the castle to try a new recipe for his Lord, it was always one of them that stayed with you

Also, it never dawned on you why people were starting to be so nice to you. You thought it was because of what happened, not paying attention to how tense they would get, the fear in their eyes. You did notice that the demon who caused your fall never came back to class, and their desk is starting to collect dust...

When you did ask Diavolo about it, he just pat your head and said that what happened was unacceptable and that the demon has been dealt with accordingly.

You don’t need to hear about what really happened to them, he doesn’t want to scare you or taint your innocence! But he doesn’t mind if anyone else hears it, he’ll be more than happy to explain in full detail what happened and what will happen to demons that even think about attempting to harm you or think that he’s “too soft”. They won’t think he’s a soft ruler after that

Diavolo is a very sweet man, one that treats you as if you’re ruling by his side as his partner and one that you never have to be scared of, but even you didn’t miss the deadly glint in his eyes whenever he spoke about that demon...

But enough about that, he wants to try that new recipe that you made just for him!

He enjoys the time that he gets to spend with you, and after this, you’ll be in his company a lot more. He can’t risk having this happen again to his love- I MEAN favorite exchange student right?

#obey me x reader #obey me reader insert #obey me #obey me swd #obey me lucifer x reader #obey me mammon x reader #obey me levi x reader #obey me leviathan x reader #obey me satan x reader #obey me asmodeus x reader #obey me asmo x reader #obey me beelzebub x reader #obey me beel x reader #obey me belphegor x reader #obey me belphie x reader #obey me diavolo x reader

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ialwaysknewyouwerepunk · 3 years

Text

fine line - a close reading

gonna cry bc i’m at the end, gonna cry bc it’s fine line.

(x x x)

want to give the same disclaimer as with lights up: this song is so layered, so multi-faceted, that i could never hope to give an exhaustive analysis. due to its vagueness and openness for interpretation, i assume that everyone, just like me, has their own ideas about it and has attached importance to it in ways that no one else’s words can or should alter. this song means the world to me for reasons that aren’t necessarily in this post, and that’s how it is with art that touches us deeply. i’ve tried my best to pull it apart, lay it bare, spread it open, if you will, so it’s almost as free as it can be for you all to form your own opinion on it. in the synthesis i will make my own conclusions, but feel free to ignore that if yours are totally different. i’m just one set of brain and heart taking in fine line and projecting whatever i think is right onto it. alright, let’s go

fine line, track 12

sung in falsetto

live version at the form: first verse not sung in falsetto - after first chorus goes into falsetto - like “thinking of her” has summoned her

Put a price on emotion

pouring emotions into the art you create: how much is genuine / how much do you show - line between being authentic to your audience and giving away too much, wanting to keep things to yourself and not feeling truthful with what you’ve written

exploits of the industry: lay your soul bare - or the exact opposite, some pretend emotion - to score that hit

I'm looking for something to buy

cynical. emotions aren’t genuine, right? where can i go buy some?

～ lights up themes. fake life, industry, being a sell-out

You've got my devotion

But man, I can hate you sometimes

“you” = career, music, Harry Styles™. devoted to the craft, to the job, all the ups and downs of it, despite the hardships it brings

“man” is deliberate: can be seen as an offhand interjection, like “man, that’s rough”, but nothing is casually placed in this song. “man” is: The Man, the heads in the industry, the people pulling the strings. The man in Harry, the man he’s been in the media all these years, the part he’s played/had to play, the man that’s in him

⟶ “hate you”: hate for industry shit, self-hate created by having to play pretend (～ only angel analysis, the persona of the Bukowski womaniser)

“sometimes” - it’s not fucked up all the time

“you” could also be a lover, but the sudden “hate” there then would be for that person, which is absent in any other song about them, doesn’t make any sense

I don't want to fight you

And I don't want to sleep in the dirt

like there’s a choice to me made, but he doesn’t want to make it: either I fight this “you” or I sleep in the dirt

“you” as the industry: if he doesn’t fight them, he might end up being a beggar, lose all his self-worth bc he gave in to everything they asked/told him to do

“you” as himself: fight your instincts, part of who you are/the persona. if he doesn’t fight to figure himself out, though, he fears he’ll also lose

“sleep in the dirt” as a sense of rejection, as well

We'll get the drinks in

So I'll get to thinking of her

drinks to cope - falling, only angel, from the dining table - or to be braver and confront emotions better - tbsl

who is “we”? who is “her”?

narrative of “you” as “lover” further disproven: if “I” and the lover get together over drinks and “I” starts thinking of “her”?

⟷ “her” could be the lover, but then who is “you”? the industry? some other person, besides that lover, harry is devoted to? multiple lovers, all of a sudden? no.

⟶ “I” and “you” are all harry, that get to thinking of “her” because she is in daydreams with him. the narrative that harry is fighting a part of him, the persona he has (had) to play bc of industry limits, makes most sense. that persona is within him now, and part of his work, but all of him, “we”, is begging to come into the light - of which she is a huge part

We'll be a fine line

balancing act. let everything coexist but pay attention that those lines don’t get crossed the wrong way. what we are, what i am, is a fine line between what makes us go under and what lets us thrive

we will be: determination to fulfil this prophecy, statement of fact “we always will be”

“we’ll be a fine line”: other way of interpreting it is that on both sides of that line is what entails “we”, all that is harry. what merges on that fine line is where it’s just right, when harry is fully himself in every way

“fine line” can also be an echo of criticism, bigotry, in the style of: it’s a fine line between being simply flamboyant and queer, between dressing like that and people thinking you’re a transvestite or summat (cause we wouldn’t want that, now, would we) - “we’ll be a fine line” could be owning all of it. putting himself in the middle of all those messy lines, as someone queer without a category

Test of my patience

patience with himself - kindness to self - took a long time to figure shit out and it was a challenge

waiting for change: industry and its allowances/openness

There's things that we'll never know

my favorite line

“we” = harry / harry and company / us in general, all of us listening

～ tpwk “i don’t need all the answers”: deep sense of acceptance

peace to be found in accepting this!!

You sunshine, you temptress

“sunshine” - as in all the love songs (blue skies, sunflowers, summer days…): lover - possible that there are multiple “you”s in this song?

sunshine could ofc also be directed at the temptress, still

female “temptress” - “i’ll get to thinking of her” - she - it’s tempting for harry to think of her all the time, to lose himself in the “her” in him

other interpretation for “temptress”: woman he knows with negative influence in his life - resemblance to woman “you flower, you feast”, so echo of Bukowski ～ only angel, kiwi (my sunshine, my love, who is involved with this temptress…)

My hand’s at risk, I fold

⟷ tpwk “dropping into the deep end”

not showing his cards just yet / forfeits

anxious to show all of him, to take the chance, with all the risks and consequences involved

Crisp trepidation

I’ll try to shake this soon

nervousness, anxiety - about (not) taking (enough) chances, (not) laying himself bare (release of the album that reveals much more than before)

“crisp” fresh, this feeling is unfamiliar - change is coming “soon”

sense of agency: I can get rid of this feeling by my own volition and make these changes - hesitant, insecure: “try”

wants to be braver. he’s not going back, but still needs to calmly coax himself further and further into the light, out into the open (“we’ll be alright”)

Spreading you open

Is the only way of knowing you

(can anyone else hear “spread thin” like a whisper under “spreading”? or am i imagining things.)

“you” is back - the only way of knowing “you” is to spread them open - the physical

to spread someone open - very literal, don’t need to paint the picture, or to lay bare, to lay it all out

⟶ “you” as himself - the only way of knowing who i am is by doing this: writing this album, performing these songs, letting others listen in and form their own interpretations, let this world grow where i’m laid bare and OPEN and exist as this person who has issues, who is angry, who doesn’t know who he is a lot of the time, but is still so happy to be here - let it spread and let it all circle back to me so i can grow deeper into myself

We'll be a fine line

We'll be alright

“we” = h & self, h & lover, h & fans

collectiveness from tpwk

(notes on a piano sounding like drops, like he’s emerged from the water and dripping dry)

SYNTHESIS

Everything about this song is plural. Personal pronouns are all over the place. I, you, her, we. The sound is incredibly layered, with Harry’s own voice echoing through its verses like he’s singing to himself in an empty cave. Meanings can be attached to every word like it’s a wax tablet used too many times. What Harry has said in interviews for once holds pretty true to the actual meaning, in my opinion.

“It felt like it described to me the process of making it and how the album felt in terms of the different kinds of songs on it.” (Capital FM)

This can mean a lot of things, and I think it means all of the things, of course. It means Fine Line is a summary of all of his emotions he visited on the album, of the things he’s laid bare. And it means that the actual process was also described, as one that can be frustrating and challenging, with added industry shit.

Harry has expressed straightforward gratefulness to his label for "leaving (him) alone” while making the album and that speaks volumes. This time, he had the chance to make his art without the constant interference of a label, which meant he could weave in criticism as well. “Put a price on emotion” is first and foremost a critique on the industry. It’s the first line of the song, setting the tone for the interpretation of this song is about the risks I took while making this album. It involves criticism on an industry that creates such an atmosphere that only a certain type of music and artist breaks through or can be successful, that limits people in their personal expression. Convinces them that it’s better that way. That it’s better to hide who they love because the general public won’t accept them. That it’s better to create a song about a fake emotion than be honest. Harry loves writing songs and being on stage, but it’s taken a while for him to be fully comfortable there as a solo artist and bloom into the person that could make Fine Line. He loves his career, but it’s also limited his freedom in ways beyond our comprehension, and it’s exploited him to the point where he didn’t know who he was, in ways that have clearly taken a toll on his mental wellbeing. To a point where he finishes this album reassuring himself, most of all, that everything will be alright.

That process of making Fine Line obviously includes Harry confronting emotions he hadn’t before. He has stated that he experienced the highest highs and the lowest lows while making it. There are things he hates, he was fighting but doesn’t want to (anymore), uncertainties he was trying to figure out but had to accept he couldn’t, risks he still doesn’t know he can take without shaking. At the centre of it all is this sense of “knowing you.” The different personal pronouns in the song paint a fractured picture, which is ultimately deliberate. That the “you” Harry is devoted to and can hate sometimes doesn’t line up with “her,” that the end focus does seem to be this “you” that is mentioned in the same breath as “man” and “temptress,” forming the “we” together with “I”.

After having songs like Lights Up, She, Falling and even TPWK, one of the central themes on the album has undoubtedly been self-discovery, in all its pain and glory. There are no female pronouns on the album besides, obviously, in She, and then here, in Fine Line. She is about a man living with a woman “just in his head”, who “sleeps in his bed while he plays pretend.” It is very clearly a trans narrative, the story of someone struggling to put into words what they’re experiencing in terms of gender. To a point that they fantasise about running away. Fine Line brings the ideas of knowing what it all means, which Lights Up kicks off (“do you know who you are?”), Falling deepens (“what am I now?”) and Treat People With Kindness turns on its head (“I don’t need all the answers”), together. Harry is still doubtful, and the questions asked earlier in the album haven’t disappeared, but he has accepted that “some things we’ll never know.” His aim, however, is still “knowing you.”

To have Fine Line, as the summary of these emotions of self-growth and self-discovery, echo that one female pronoun, speaks volumes. It is a direct reference to She, to that story about gender. “Her” in this song refers to “she (who) lives in daydreams with (him).” The one who still only fully comes out when they’ve had a drink. The one he’s still working to include in who he is, as he tries to figure out who he is, all of it. The song where he sings in falsetto, just like on Fine Line. Of which he sang the first verse an octave lower live at the forum, switching between those voices, those perspectives. That’s also why “you” in this song is also Harry to me. We get this fractured sense of self, this “I” and “you” conversing over a drink, this “you” Harry is devoted to and wants to figure out. “You” and “I” form “we” and all of them are Harry. The lines are blurry on purpose, there is no way to figure out where “you” ends and “I” begins.

“You sunshine, you temptress” is the most enigmatic line in that respect, and to me blurs those lines even more between the pronouns. “You” is suddenly also identified by a female noun. And no this isn’t about some kind of love triangle. “Sunshine” aligns with all the odes to his lover in the rest of the album. So what does that mean? That there are multiple “you”s in this song, meaning that Harry is addressing both his lover and a temptress? So “her” he’ll get to thinking of, the only other female pronoun used in the song, is identified as a temptress, but tempting to do what? To take risks? And no I won’t forget the “man, I can hate you sometimes,” where "man” is not a casual interjection but an identifier of “you.”

Or is it an echo of “the light” from Golden’s “bring me back to the light” and Light’s Up’s “step into the light”? So that the “sunshine” symbolises being in the clear, being out of the darkness running through his heart, the darkness caused by not knowing who you are. “You sunshine,” you beacon of light. “You temptress,” risk-taker and source of anxiety. You, one I need to spread open to figure out, to know about, source of happiness and despair, one I’m devoted to but also hate. You, man, you, temptress. You there, in the mirror looking back at me.

All of you, and myself included, we’ll be a fine line. And we’ll be alright.

This song is about all of that. The self in art, the self on its own, the other, the journey, the chances, the fears, the passion. Hope. Reassurance. Confidence. And, most importantly, that everything will be alright in the end.

read all my lyric analyses here

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elia-de-silentio · 3 years

Text

Recap on Vanijeanne

As we try to recover from ... well, chapter 50, who wants to read a recap on the most controversial and Problematique couple in the manga?

*crickets*

Well, it was in my to-do list, so I'm writing it anyways.

Now, I love their first meeting, because while it sucks on 'what is actually happening' level, it does a wonderful work of exposure of the characters, hinting at their further development in a few panels.

Jeanne is presented as a '''''"strong woman'''''' ... meaning that's she's very good at fighting. That's essentially a good thug, it says nothing on character strenght. In fact, the only words she says for the first two chapters are asking Luca for orders: she's not shown as someone who takes initiative and acts on her own.

Even her emotional bond to Luca is taken as a sign of her weakness; while caring for someone isn't in any way a moral or emotional deficiency, quite the opposite actually, it hints at the fact that this girl has been so isolated, she has grown terribly attached to the only person to treat her with more than basic decency.

Speaking of basic decency, Vanitas fails even that. He straight-out sexually harassess her, making her feel even more powerless after mocking her for not living up to the strenght expected from her. We will later see that Vanitas isn't above psychological attacks on his enemies (hello, Astolfo), but this is callous even for his standards. Why would he do that?

Well, even if it was the first chapters, it was a bit of a shock to see the character behaving in such a way. Insofar, Vanitas had been presented as cocky, somewhat pushy and trollish, but also determined to help people, kind to Amelia, cheerful and funny. All around, a 'good guy'.

Even Noé, who back then said he didn't particularly like Vanitas, called 'overwhelmingly right' his healing of Amelia. Vanitas pulls a face at hearing that, and I suspect his behaviour towards Jeanne is in some measure a way to 'de-impress' Noé. After all, as we'll see in later chapters, he is an horrible person and can't risk someone actually liking him, right?

Their following meeting at the Bal Masqué is almost as bad. Here, Vanitas exploits her weakened state to flat out coerce Jeanne into drinking his blood, again using Luca as emotional blackmail (she'll hurt Vani, so the kid will be okay). Again, Jeanne really, really doesn't want to do this, and the scene drives home well her turmoil and hatred for the whole situation.

If Jeanne is being coerced in a situation of weakness, Vanitas is not actually faring that better. He wanted to have his blood drunk because he had seen Dominique and Noé do that, and he wanted something similar to the affection these two expressed, but not too similar because he doesn't deserve it and so he must make sure that the other party hates him and - this guy is a mess.

But the blood-drinking looks definitely painful for him. Heck, he even has to cover his own mouth to avoid screaming!

Their third meeting keeps on this proud tradition. In this instance, Vanitas makes quite a bit of back and forth: first he teases Jeanne in public about that possession mark, then dials back when he sees Luca taking issue; he offers privately to help her mantain her secret about the uncontrollable blood-craving, then he puts forth conditions (that she calls him by his name, thus establishing an intimacy she doesn't want, and that she drinks only from him, this limiting the damage she could do but also keeping a personal leash on her); he requires that she only drinks his blood, prattling on how good it feels, but then he has the same pained expression when she actually does it. His motivations here are probably mixed: partly desire to help a possible curse-bearer, partly a way to exercise control on Jeanne (as we have seen with Noé, Vanitas likes being the one in charge of situations), and partly some actual attraction to her.

On her part, Jeanne stands firm in her dislike of Vanitas, even if she really liked the taste of his blood.

Later in the same chapter, Noé questions Vanitas about love; he admits that he doesn't really know, just when he looks a Jeanne il flusso sanguigno gli passa dalle zone superiori a quelle inferiori his heart beats faster. He also lists his reasons for liking Jeanne; quite surprisingly, not only her considerable chest (though that got attention) but also some personality traits, such as her weird blend of toughness and fragility. Still, they're not exactly deep reasons. It sound more like a superficial crush.

But then, he adds something very important: he pursues her because she won't love him back. Here we got the first big hint of Vanitas's huge self-loathing: he is an horrible person, he doesn't deserve love, if someone loves him it means they have got some problems. He likes Jeanne, she's not the kind of person to like him back, he can have a '''safe''' relationship!

Then there is their famous date. It began as a ploy on Jeanne's part to get rid of Vanitas: because of quella comare di Noé, Dominique and then Jeanne herself get to know about that observation just above. So they get the idea: let's pretend that Jeanne really likes Vanitas, so he will leave on his own.

A sound plan, which would have worked if not for ... well, take a look at Jeanne up there. Does she look like she's confessing her love, or trying very hard not to throw up?

But the problem is: the date is great. Vanitas understands exactly what she was up to, and promptly went along with the act. And for the first time, he is actually nice to her: he shows her around the city, is attentive to her wishes, he speaks his mind about some little things.

And this completely throws Jeanne off her balance. Where does this sudden change come from? (And this was probably Vani's intention all along, as another way to keep her on edge and control her)

Not to mention, she's really not used to kindness. She's a bourreau, a pariah. She is so rarely treated with any decency, she is extremely sensitive when someone shows her even a little of it.

This ... '''cute''' rendez-vous comes to an abrupt end when an accident triggers Jeanne's bloodthirst. Vanitas gets her away before anything can happen, lets her feed on him (which still look painful) and tries to understand what exactly her problem is.

Whatever it is, Jeanne is forbidden by Ruthven to talk about it; the only thing certain, is that she is terrified by the perspective of harming Luca, should she no longer be able to control this bloodthirst. Vanitas reacts to this by promising to kill her before such thing can happen.

This scene is ...uuuuh ... interesting. I think that Vanitas actually meant well, even if only in part and in his own way. He surely sees it as an important promise, that he will honor should the necessity manifest itself. As for the other part, here is another nice chance for him to be the one in control!

With their next meeting, Mochizuki slams the gas pedal. In this case, Jeanne is not in a condition of vulnerability, there is nothing to blackmail her with at hand, and she's physically better off: it's the first time we see her take charge.

She has finally the chance to show off her better qualities: her sense of honor in repaying debts (Vanitas protected her from a blow from Astolfo before, getting wounded as a result), her level-headedness in difficult situation and her sense of responsibility towards others.

Vanitas, on the other hand, is a wreck. He lost his book, he got wounded, he has got hypotermia, he couldn't prevent Jeanne from stripping him out of the wet clothes and seeing the scars on his body, he has got a fever and is delirious. In this state, he gets a pretty loose tongue: he asks Jeanne some pretty personal questions about her motives here. She stays firm on what she 'has to' do regarding Chloé, but still, this is the first seed of doubt in her mind.

Oh, and there another kinda-kiss. No idea what Jeanne was thinking, passing Vanitas water that way instead of just putting the bottle to his lips.

Anyways, Vanitas really doesn't like not being the one in control. The morning after he acts the coldest he has ever been to Jeanne, dismissing her and then focusing on the task at hand, doing his best to avoid talking about that moment of fragility. Still, he shows some care for her, inviting her to listen to Dante's informations about Chloé.

They have a bit of a conflict of interest in there: Jeanne feels guilty about not fulfilling her duty as a tool and wants to amend by actually killing her mentor, Vanitas wants to save that same person; and, maybe because of personal experience, he has realized that Chloé 's death won't make Jeanne happy.

And how does the situation get resolved? In the sweetest, most actually romantic way possible. Vanitas exposes the truth about Gevaudan to Jeanne, and asks her what she truly wants.

A bit of exposition on Jeanne's past reveals that she has severe trauma after witnessing the death of her parents and being treated as a bourreau, a tool; she's convinced that if she ever acts according to her own will, someone else will be hurt. She's completely broken down by not having been able to kill one of the few people who treated her with kindness, and blames herself for everything that's happened in this arc.

But (after some unwitting influence from Noé) in sweeps our knight in a shining baggy coat, with the following message: she has every right to her desires. He wants to make her happy, he won't die as a result, he's ready to accept all she has to say, without judging her, with no condescension or trying to control her. All she has to do is be the one to give the order, and he'll obey. And she wishes for Chloé to be saved.

Chloé is saved. Her will to live is restored, and she is reunited with the people she loves. Jeanne is, in her own words, 'so happy she could burst', and extremely grateful to Vanitas.

This propels her to first drink his blood, and this time it really doesn't look painful; then to kiss him. And this time, he is the one to blush and stutter, clearly off-balanced by what has happened and by the fact he doesn't dislike it one bit.

The following chapters can be only described as hysterical. Upon actually falling in love, Vanitas enacts the following:

• Spending ten days in bed, thinking he's about to die.

• Believing Jeanne cursed him

• Describing extensively and graphically, in front of Count Orlok, that particular blood-drinking che per come è posto sembra più una trombata

• Getting physically thrown out as a result

• Wandering in a haze, thinking about Jeanne's smile

• Running in a panic after hearing some convenient passerby declare his feelings for a girl with him

• After almost literally stumbling on Roland, sitting down with him and Olivier and trying to get romantic advice from a guy he dislikes and another he has never seen before.

• Trying the 'asking for a friend' trick. Is figured out after an esteemed timeframe of 0.2 seconds.

(Perdonate l'interruzione. La faccia da culo di Roland meritava la condivisione)

• Getting the most desperate look after Roland diagnisizes him with 'love'

• Throwing away all pretenses and expressing outright his self-loathing, to what is pretty much a couple of strangers, in stark contrast with his usual reservation.

• Reacting like a pissed-off cat to any attempts of comfort from Roland and Noé.

Meanwhile, Jeanne ...

Well, actually there is a whole sequence where she realizes she is in love, and describes the same symptoms as Vani in a cheerful, positive way to two flabbergasted Dominique and Luca; but I felt like the above panel was the most culturally relevant.

The point is, now that the feelings are real, Jeanne is the most confident and forward of the two. And this is a pretty great thing for her: as a bourreau, she didn't think love would have played a part in her life; she felt that she was just a tool, but not now, she has realized that she can love and be loved, and this makes her happy and confident. As Dominique observes, she shreds the shyness and insecurity that circumstances had forced on her, and returns to her original, cheerful personality; you can't take your eyes off her.

Still, in a following chapter, she has that little fantasy of a classic fairytale with herself and Vani in the protagonist roles. While it's a very cute and funny scene, it highlights something that Dominique too noticed: she is very black-and-white about Vanitas. She has gone from absolutely loathing him (with good reason!) to absolutely idealizing him (again, he finally acted with real kindness and selflessness towards her, but she doesn't even recognize how awful he was towards her at the start).

This would mean a fair share of problems with any normal person, as nobody is completely horrible or completely good, but with a walking bundle of trauma, contrasting feelings and self-loathing as Vanitas? It's probably a recipe for a disaster.

So! All in all, I admit I really like this couple. I like the possibilities of self-discovery each of them represents for the other: for Vanitas, to realize that his life isn't fixated by whatever happened in his past and that he can have positive relationships with people, and that he can amend his mistakes and receive forgiveness; for Jeanne, to fully experience positive emotions, and acquire a more balanced view of people and situations if her feelings survive the clash with Vanitas's failings.

... that was, before the disaster that was chapter 50. Jeanne has a very good relationship with Dominique, too; she was worried about her, and is likely investigating her disappearence, especially because Luca called specifically for her when he found out about it.

Remember? The same Dominique Vanitas would be willing to let be killed in order to protect his own memories, and even insulted in front of Noé? If Jeanne arrives on the scene, or finds out what happened, she will be forced to a new, decidedly less positive evaluation of Vanitas.

Misha is really being a wrecking ball on whatever halfway positive relationship his brother has, as if Vanitas himself wasn't enough to mess them up.

Thanks to anyone who bothered to read my ramblings!

#vnc #vanitas no carte #the case study of vanitas #vanitas no shuki #vnc vanitas #vnc meta #vnc analysis #vnc spoilers #vnc jeanne #elia's recaps

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purvishraick · 3 years

Text

A TALE OF ALWAYS AND FOREVER

CHAPTER 7

Fanfiction : Bloodbound (Choices)

Pairing : Adrian Raines x Amy Richard Parker (MC)

Warning : none

Rating: Teen

TAG LIST : @otherworldlypresents , @evelynistic , @silma-words , @fireycookie , @lauren-raines-x , @nala-raines

If anyone wanna be tagged in future do let me know….

read previous chapter here ….. Chapter 1 , Chapter 2 , Chapter 3 , Chapter 4 , Chapter 5 , Chapter 6

So here i promised this last night but sorry it got delayed ...got stuck in some important work .... now here i am .... i hope u like it

Amy had to forcefully cut the call, in order to shut her brother and she new that this will make him angry. But she didn’t need a pep talk for not getting wasted in the club before her interview. She could handle her brother afterwards and the interview was important. She wandered here and there and settled on the bench. She felt like she is being watched from behind but didn’t find someone. Just then a stunning woman with an icy demeanor came towards her.

“Amy?” stern woman said .

“ yes that’s me “ she replied .

“I am Nicole Anderson, VP of operations at Raines Corp. I will interview you . “ she said .

Amy was surprised to see that she was going to be interviewed by someone so high at post but her queries were eased when she reminded her that they take their hiring process very seriously and she followed her in the conference room keeping her confident look .

“ now then. The Raines Corporation is a global leader in technology and innovation . Why exactly are you interested in being the executive assistant to our CEO ? “

“well…” Amy took a deep breath and continued , “ I’d love to help make the world a better place . what I admire most about the Raines Corporation is your dedication to global innovation and improvement. The clean – water initiative …the vaccine for the cerella virus …the green energy project… you guys aren’t just getting rich. You’re trying to help people, to make technology that’ll save the planet. I can’t think of anything better than being a part of that.”

“hmm……a good answer. A bit cloying , perhaps, but Adrian might actually like that “ Nicole said with an appreciative look.

Just as she was going to speak the next thing , the door at the back of the room swings open , and a handsome man in a perfectly – tailored suit strolls in.

Intelligence sparks through his eyes . He was extremely charming , with his black obsidian eyes assessing her , her already killer nervousness now peaked a whole new level.

“ Adrian I wasn’t expecting you…” Nicole asked unable to hide the surprise in her voice .

Adrian as in Adrian Raines …well all escalated very quickly for her .

“ I had a free minute. Is this the candidate ?” he asked taking the authority in his hands as he decided.

Professionalism and seriousness reflected in his voice .

“ yes …but I’ve just started the interview and—“ Nicole asked stammering .

“ I’ll take over from here “ he cut her off not wanting to take any excuses .

“……of course sir , go right ahead “ she surrendered .

Adrian sat across Amy , eyes burning right through her . He has never seen such a beautiful person in his entire existence , god knows how would she be as a person .

Amy’s nervousness grew even more when his eyes bore through her but she remembered once more , she is Amy Richard Parker and nothing in this world ever scares her , she remembered her brothers’ advices on professionality and confidence and recalled her dad’s proud thought about her and her mother’s loving smile . Now that was enough to calm her down , so she put on the brave and fearless smile again on her face and straightened her back.

“ Amy , is it ? “ Adrian looked at her and saw her hazel brown eyes which her so hypnotizing , with all his strength he prevented himself from being lost in them .

“ that’s right “ she said interrupting his thoughts .

“ tell me Amy , what do you desire ? “ he asked her and she was surprised at the question .

Amy was already so mesmerized from him that this question surprised her.

“ You mean ……why do I want this job ? Because I – “ but was interrupted by Adrian .

“ I didn’t ask why you want this job. I asked what do you desire . “ he asked seriously and professionally.

“ I desire ……PASSION “ she answered after thinking fir a while .

“ oh , really ? “ he asked , his brows raising , he was in true sense intrigued by her answer .

“Sorry , if that is too personal but I am just being honest . I want to feel deeply. I want to experience life , live every moment like my last. We never know when is our last moment , it is better to live our life to the fullest than to regret it afterwards . That’s what I desire “ she answered honestly and it was the true answer she saw what happened to her family everything was good and happy then suddenly they lost everything , she do not want to regret anything .

“ I can relate“ Adrian was impressed internally but didn’t expressed it. He supressed a smile to reach his face. He was truly impressed by her desire to live and feel and experience. He now looked at her resume .

“ lets see here … graduated college 3 years ago …masters in communication …interned at Mannon financial…volunteered in San Torbida and France abroad for a year “ he read out and again was impressed from her but wondered why it took her an extra year to sign up for this interview or for that matter any other one .

“ yep that’s right “ she said .

“ well , how was that tell me in three words “ he asked .

“ difficult. Enlighting. Rewarding. “ she replied easily .

“ good , this job can be challenging and unpredictable , are you comfortable running unusual errands ?”

“Absolutely “

I have been doing them since a long time now , she thought to herself , smiling .

“ Handling confidential information ? “

“ I can keep a secret “

You wont even realise how many I am keeping right now too , she thought again and smirked .

“ Working nights ? “

“ Always been a night owl “

Okay , I atleast told him one thing fully without strings attached , she smiled while thinking .

“ Good , Anything else I should know about you ? “

“ Hmmmm …… I have got WORLD CLASS people skills “ , she said with a proud smile .

“ Oh , really ? “ he asked with questioning eyes .

“ I was voted ‘ most likable ‘ in my high school class . Also ‘ most popular ‘ and ‘ best smile ‘ . Technichally you are not supposed to win in multiple categories , but I was able to persuade them . And also the cherry on the top I was the PROM QUEEN “ , she stated out all of her achievements proudly and remembered how happy and proud her father was to see her that day . She and her brothers has always been the brightest in the whole family , anyways. Suddenly feeling nostalgic and tears building in her eyes she averted her gaze on the floor.

“ Thus proving your point “ said a grinning and impressed Adrian , but he saw a glint of sadness in her eyes and he doubted that he saw tears too , and was unable to understand why counting her proud moments made her sad .

“ exactly” Amy said after controlling her emotions and forcing a smile.

“ one more question “ Adrian leaned forward hands folded on the table and with an intense expression , told her the story of a man who got a genie lamp and destroyed everything , and then finally asked her about what should his final wish should be .

“I think his final wish should be to undo his first two wishes “ she said after thinking for a while .

“because ?” Adrian asked curious to know her theory .

“ because he already had everything he could ask for a family and many friends …what could he ask for more it was more than enough …all he wanted or ever needed was right there in front of him …this is a story of temptation and greed …he should have never played this game …all now he can do is making things as they were before “

Her answer was something totally honest … Adrian glanced at her and then noticed how true each and every word was . she was not only beautiful but also quite intelligent …in true sense beauty with brains.

She was quite interesting too …Adrian personally never saw such a person in his entire life … and he needed to know her …he knew that it is a huge risk and a mistake but he already did that when he decided to interview her himself …now he couldn’t resist her … so then he does the only thing he could do …he knew that Nicole will be a big trouble after this but guess he was okay with that if it was what would keep this girl around .

Then he grins brightly at Amy and says

“ You’re hired “

“wait what ? …seriously “ Amy asked with wide eyes , she was surprised , how in world is it possible that someone gets hired so fast …this was weird to her … but of course she was happy .

Adrian left an inside giggle watching her surprised reaction …she looked adorable with those wide eyes …his smile grew even wider … and he extends his hand …which obviously she took .

‘ oh my god …his skin is impossibly smooth…and hold so firm …wow he is really handso-……no no no …stop brain stop thinking …no eyes …don’t look in his eyes for too long … fuck …, I am a disaster …stop cheeks don’t turn red …god please ‘ she thought .

Good god if god wanted to kill her please kill her in this exact moment …someone save her from this embarrassment …she was a disaster with wide eyes blushing cheeks …FUCK.

Adrian saw her flustered reaction which was by far the cutest thing he saw in his life … his vampire senses made her blushing cheeks clearly visible …the dark pink tint on her cheek made her impossibly adorable.

“welcome to Raines Corporation “ , he said with a bright smile

They made eye contact for just moment but everything stood still for that particular moment …it was mesmerising .

In that moment Adrian didn’t knew about Amy but he knew that they were going to go a long way .

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@choicesficwriterscreations

#bloodbound #adrian raines #adrian x mc #adrian×mc #kamilah sayeed #jax matsuo #lily spencer #choices stories we play #choices fanfiction #choices fic writers creations #cfwc #fic of the week

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evelhak · 4 years

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“Ancient” wlw ships

This is such a self-indulgent post but I need to get my thoughts out. Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about all the girls I shipped in fiction when I was a kid and didn’t realize I was shipping them.

I mean, they pretty much all had boyfriends or ended up marrying a man, and I was pretty much on board, in my eyes it was just some part of the story that needed to happen, because it always did. I think the common thing with these characters was that the female best friend was, at least more often than not, narratively more important than the guy, or just seemed to have a much greater emotional impact in the story.

Thinking about this has been so fun and eye-opening that I just feel like sharing a list of my biggest ancient wlw pairs that I only now, years later, realize were totally in love in my mind, I just didn’t have a concept for it yet. I’m sure that’s relatable for some people, but maybe there’s someone out there who was shipping these same characters??

This will include mild spoilers. And it’ll be long.

1. Cornelia & Elyon from W.i.t.c.h.

I COMPLETELY lived in these comics when I was 8-12 years old, and nothing in it was as compelling to me as Cornelia and Elyon. Guess I was already a sucker for best-friends-to-enemies-to-friends-again, even though I didn’t realize I also wanted them to become lovers. Best friends was all there was to me back then, that was the name I assigned to the highest form of love in my head. Which I still don’t see as invalid? I just didn’t realize I would’ve related to the romance aspect between best friends a hell of a lot more than I did to any of the relationships the W.i.t.c.h. girls had with their boyfriends. Cornelia and Caled was almost as bad as Buffy and Angel! Cornelia and Peter was just boring af. All the other W.i.t.c.h. girls’ boyfriends were all equally boring to me except for Will and Matt, but that was because their struggle to admit their feelings for each other was written in a funny way, not because their relationship had any actual depth.

But Elyon and Cornelia would’ve been perfect! I mean if your best friend has the ability to understand you so well, that with her magical intuition, she can draw you a picture of a guy you’re going to fall for, a guy she has never met... why would you even want to be with that guy anymore? Why wouldn’t you just be with her instead?? What Cornelia and Caleb had was limerence (I actually applaud the comics for eventually treating it as such and showing how it was harmful to both of the characters!) but what Cornelia and Elyon had was true love that transcends dimensions. Cornelia never gave up on Elyon, not even for a moment, after she became the W.i.t.c.h. girls’ enemy, and when she was in trouble, Cornelia had a hunch from another dimension, and she didn’t hesitate to come to her rescue. (The fact that during the same mission she also manages to fall for the dude Elyon drew for her in the past seems more like an accident, to be honest. The real deal was patching things up with Elyon, it was both more emotionally impactful AND more plot-relevant!)

It was also really sad to read the comics sometimes, because Elyon was absolutely my favourite character, and she wasn’t around much after the first arc, being a queen in another dimension. But every time there was a flashback to when Elyon was still living on Earth and being cute with Cornelia I was like MOOOOORE.

2. Sora and Layla from Kaleido Star

If you haven’t watched this anime you’ve missed. SO. MUCH. This is probably my favourite anime ever. And it features another type of ship I LOVE. Which is partners in some sort of activity, usually sports. When it’s written well it’s just so impactful and intense. These girls are routinely risking their lives in their passion for acrobatics, so they need to have absolute trust in each other. And oh boy is the relationship between them written well. I love it when two characters initially don’t get the way the other thinks or sees the world, but as they grow closer, it’s the other’s way of thinking that really unlocks something huge for them.

Also what’s so compelling about Sora and Layla is that there really isn’t anything like them in any other anime, that I’ve come across, at least. These partnerships are always between two guys in a sports anime, the partnership is at the heart of the story and the emotional stakes are so high it’s no wonder most people don’t want to ship these guys with their intended female love interests. Kaleido Star takes this even further because the guy who is in love with Sora is literally a joke, or the fact that he’s in love with Sora is a running gag, and nothing more. All the focus is on Sora and Layla as partners, and how they change each other's lives for the better.

Also the way Sora pines for Layla when she’s away or not paying enough attention to her is SO... I mean you don’t even have to think it’s romantic for it to absolutely melt you. Although it feels pretty heavily romantically coded, and it doesn’t even feel like queer baiting, because it’s just SO real and honest. And how Layla can’t stop thinking about how Sora is changing her as a person. There’s no question about the fact that the relationship between these women is the true meat of the show.

3. Anne and Diana from Anne of Green Gables

I read these books over and over again as a kid, and the Netflix show renewed my love for these two. They are kind of ridiculous, but SO cute. Looking back, it seems obvious that they had a crush on each other, they were just SO giddy all the time they were alone. Sure, you can excuse all their romantic gestures (like changing locks of hair, and vowing to never leave each other with joined hands and grand words) with saying Anne just romanticizes everything, but it never really felt like just that to me.

I’ll never forget how devastated Anne was about Diana getting married, and I don’t remember the wording but initially she wished she could keep Diana to herself for their whole lives. And every time they talked about marriage it was something they were both gonna do not as individuals, but rather the emphasis seemed to be on the shared experience, and how their children would be best friends and all that. It was all about them together. Like their romantic fantasies were nothing without the other somehow in the picture.

I don’t hate Anne and Gilbert but I don’t love them either. Gilbert has always been just sort of “meh”. He’s okay, but also the kind of love interest that can never compel me much.

4. Chocolat and Vanilla from Sugar Sugar Rune

Seriously, this would have been SO GOOD if it was canon.

Think about it, best friends, chosen to compete against each other for the throne. These witches go to the human world to attract male attention and collect feelings from the men, turning the feelings into heart shaped crystals and whoever collects more will be the queen. I mean... the story was good as it is but if they had ended up together and been queens TOGETHER?? That would have been the best story. It could have had SUCH a compelling best-friends-to-competitors-to-enemies-to-friends-to-lovers storyline! There would have been room for so much character development.

And if my memory doesn’t betray me the story would not change much at all if they didn’t end up with the guys they do end up with! Especially Vanilla’s guy is like an afterthought and Chocolat’s guy is... well, a sum of my least favourite tropes, including the one that will remind everyone about Mortal Instruments a LITTLE too much, so he can get lost for all I care.

I cried many times while reading this, and it always had something to do with these two girls.

5. Yoko and Liao from Yoko Tsuno

Okay, these two might have a problematic age gap, I’m not sure, but I didn’t know of that possibility as a kid, they just looked the same age to me. I was a huge Yoko Tsuno fan as a pre-teen, and there were so many interesting female adventurers in this series but for some reason the dynamic between Yoko and Liao was my favourite, even though Liao only appeared in one album. I just really felt like I needed to see more of these characters interacting and where their relationship would develop.

There was something about them that seemed rather original to me then, and a nice change. The reader had already gotten used to Yoko as the hero, she was always saving the day everywhere, she was like The Doctor in a way and not only because she time-travelled. She is simply badass. In Liao’s story there’s a prophecy about a girl who speaks to a dragon and saves everyone, and Yoko thinks that girl is her because she’s from the future and knows the dragon is a machine, but it turns out to be Liao, and that was somehow really satisfying. Yoko treats Liao obnoxiously in the beginning, doesn’t give her much credit, but is deeply humbled after Liao needs to save her ass multiple times because she’s just too sure of herself. It was cool to see how Yoko really needed to grow in this story and realize her limitations, and how wrong she was to treat Liao the way she did and look down on her just because Liao was physically weak, had a temper, and came from a much earlier time period than Yoko.

By the end they are clearly very attached to each other (Liao weeping in Yoko’s arms and Yoko confessing how full of herself she was when they met) and respect each other, and I just really would’ve liked to see where they would go from there. I thought about them meeting again A LOT when I was a kid.

That’s my big five! :D I could go on but this is already long, I need to sleep, and these are the characters that I’ve been thinking about the most lately. If you read this far for some reason it would be cool to hear if you have any similar (or different) experiences.

#old ships #wlw #w.i.t.c.h #kaleido star #yoko tsuno #anne of green gables #sugar sugar rune #personal #rambly

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ghoularts · 4 years

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Let’s talk about the future chapters and fates of some characters!

Oh boy so this is gonna be a long ass post but I just wanted to discuss things about the ‘war arc’!

First, I’ll start off with Hawks/Keigo Takami.

Status: Unconscious/Severely burned, escaped to the forest away from the mansion

Hawks has become quite the controversial character in the fandom. It’s up to the reader to decide whether they believe his actions was right or wrong. There is no correct/clear answer here. I won’t dive into any of that right now, instead I’m going to focus on what his arc holds in the future.

Since he hit his head on the concrete, he was knocked unconscious and could possibly go into a coma. (Because we know Horikoshi likes to drag things out when it comes to the possibility of Dabi being Touya.)

I do not believe Keigo will die. Especially now that he holds important information about Dabi. We also don’t know Keigo’s whole backstory yet nor do we know what really happened with Jeanist. The recorder he had got burned up with his jacket or was destroyed by Dabi in this panel:

You can see a little piece go flying from his hand just above his staples.

What I do believe is Hawks will die. His hero persona. Now that his wings are gone, the Hero Commission will most likely drop him just like that. Keigo will live on with the guilt of killing Twice. He really wanted to save Twice, trying to get him to surrender, only aiming to incompacitate him until, well... you know.

When Dabi calls him dirty, he doesn’t deny it. It’s probably going to impact him a lot when all this is over. The best direction for him is to have a talk with Tokoyami about his actions and break away from the HPSC. He should expose them since they groomed him as a child into a weapon, sent kids into a war, etc.

Personally, I’d love for Keigo to become a vigilante. It suits him much better at this point. I don’t think he’ll be able to regrow/regenerate his wings. There’s nothing left, plus he could only regenerate the feathers when there were his little stubs left. Also if you remember Endeavor talking about his blue flames it makes sense; “Carbonized cells can’t regenerate.”

Next up we have Tokoyami!

Status: Alive, slightly burned, escaped to the forest away from the mansion

I’ve seen many posts about how Tokoyami was brainwashed. This is simply not the case. The Hero Commission seems to kind of despise UA or doesn’t have all to that much influence with the school. Except for the time they didn’t want the cultural festival to take place (at least that’s what I remember). Many of the teachers have their own thoughts about the Hero Commission such as Midnight in the teacher’s conference saying that the kids shouldn’t be put in battles like this. Aizawa has his suspicions about the organization as well.

Tokoyami respects his mentor because Hawks taught him many things about his Quirk and gave him good advice. (“If you’ve got wings, you should spread them out and fly. Don’t be confined to the ground.) Hawks means a lot to Tokoyami so of course he’d come to his rescue. When Dabi points out Twice’s body, Tokoyami looks horrified. When flying away and telling Hawks he did the right thing, he was running on emotions and shock. His mentor needs medical attention and fast. Caleb, a translator for the manga, notes that Tokoyami drops his edgy tone when he says these things to Hawks. Tokoyami is panicking. He just wants Hawks to be safe.

Also, his experience/interactions most likely play a role in his thinking. These villains tried to kidnap him, kidnapped a classmate, killed multiple people and plan to kill many more, and attacked his class on several occasions. Why would he believe Dabi right away when Dabi has burned alive dozens of people, thugs and innocent heroes like Snatch, and is trying to actively kill his mentor and Tokoyami himself?

Again, I think Hawks and Tokoyami will have a talk after this and Tokoyami will have to question Hawks’ actions. Keigo will probably tell him something along the lines of ‘Don’t support what I did’ or ‘Don’t follow in my footsteps.’ Call me crazy, but there’s actually the possibility that the HPSC will take notice of Tokoyami’s power and the risks he took to save Keigo. They might offer him training to be a ‘special hero’ like Keigo was.

Miruko!

Status: Missing arm/part of leg, bleeding severely, in Jakku Hospital

Oh man where we last left off with the rabbit queen herself was her bleeding on the floor out of energy. Endeavor cauterized her wounds so at least it stopped most of the bleeding. It is worrying to know that she’s still in the hospital when Shigaraki is about to wake up and destroy everything.

Though I don’t think she’s going to die. Especially since that color page showed mechanical limbs in the same spot where she lost them. Horikoshi also loves drawing her, so let’s hope he likes drawing her enough to keep her alive lol. She’ll probably be in recovery for a while before resuming her hero work with her new prosthetic limbs.

Endeavor

Status: Alive, in Jakku Hospital

Endeavor was taking on Nomu with Ryukyu in chapter 269. He is also in range of Shigaraki being in the hospital with all the other heroes. Many people believe he has huge death flags, but I seriously don’t think he’ll die this arc until we know what happened with Touya. Hawks might ask him about Touya if the black speech bubble was Dabi saying that he’s Endeavor’s son. This will both crush Keigo’s admiration for the flame hero and make Endeavor realize just how badly his abusive behavior affected his family. Perhaps he’ll go public with it? Or maybe the villains will use it against Endeavor one day and the public will turn on him?

Gigantomachia/Kirishima/Ashido

Gigantomachia is truly terrifying. He could wipe the floor and completely wreck the heroes. He has finally stood up and will be on the move, heading in Shigaraki’s direction because of his ‘Master’s Scent.’ Since Shiggy now possesses All for One, Giganto will follow his orders.

What’s even scarier is that this guy was introduced way back in Kirishima’s and Ashido’s backstory. Which means those two could possibly face this giant. Kirishima wouldn’t be able to make a dent, but Ashido could wear him down over time with the exposure to acid. I’ve also seen theories floating around about him being Crimson Riot. So Kiri facing his idol?

I’ll touch more on other characters later (Deku, Shiggy, Dabi, Mic, Aizawa, Kaminari etc.) but I’ll tell you guys which characters I think will die:

Xless (I mean, come on, Shiggy’s gonna kill this man)

Crust (we have no attachment to him, plus he hasn’t been fairing well with the Nomu. Not to mention he’s near Shigaraki as well)

Anyways, what do you guys think? Have anything to add like other potential outcomes of their arcs?

#bnha #bnha analysis #bnha spoilers #mha #mha spoilers #bnha manga #hawks #keigo takami #my hero academia #tokoyami fumigake #tokoyami #endeavor #enji todoroki #miruko #rumi usagiyama #bnha 271 #gigantomachia #eijiro kirishima #mina ashido

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funkymbtifiction · 3 years

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Hey there! I’m wondering if you could help me type someone? I’m fairly sure she’s Fe-dom, but I also see some Se-dom and Ne-dom traits that make me question things, so I’ll try to provide some evidence for each axis.

Fe-Ti:

She’s incredibly outgoing and personable which really lends well to her day job of being a hairdresser. She can connect with people from all walks of life instantly and can talk with them for hours. She actually told me a really sweet story recently about how she helped a young autistic client overcome his fear of haircuts by sitting patiently with him at the salon for an hour and talking to him about video games he is into. Her ability to disarm people’s fears and put them at ease is incredible. She moonlights as a synthwave artist, and really loves the collaborative nature of making music with others. She’s also always the first to volunteer to cook at get togethers because she says cooking for people is an expression of love. She never hesitates to say what she is feeling and always wants to resolve disagreements right away.

However, she has a reeeeally hard time being detached and thinking logically. For example, a couple of times we’ve tried to discuss politics, but it always becomes circular because she’s settled on the idea that “politics aren’t even important! Why do people fight over them? We’re all human! Can’t we all just get along?” She shows very little interest in building a system of understanding for herself and just wants “love and good vibes” and told me that I “just don’t understand because I’m a Virgo(???)”, at which point I burst every aux-Ti vein in my ENTP forehead.

This all sounds 2-core ESFJ with a 9 and a 7 fix (let’s not talk about anything that causes dissent or trouble or unpleasantness, because we all share this important, vital thing in common that we are all people, so we should all live in harmony together! =).

Se-Ni (Forgive me if I mess up here, as I’m not as familiar with these functions, being an ENTP):

Always the first to jump into things… to varying degrees of success. She can be really impulsive under stress, frequently blowing her money on things that she thinks “look cool”. She has a huge weakness for falling for people way too fast too - she’s literally moved cities to be with “the one” after only knowing them for two weeks (she’s done this at least twice that I know of). I also think that Se might be somewhere in her stack because she seems to rely on (and often overindulge) in sensory things to relax like food, pot, alcohol, and sex. <- this seems like high emotion/sensation emphasis in general, a social variant dominant (so/sp or so/sx, which is more likely, and could make an ESFJ more risk-taking, as long as it’s to be with THE ONE I LOVE), and being an image type (2w3?).

[…]

Ne-Si:

I really wanted to rule out Ne, but for every long term plan that seems solid and works out for her, she seems to have 50+ ideas on the go, or that get left on the cutting room floor. For example, she writes about twelve songs at a time - slowly switching between them and chipping away at each one until they are finished - which really resonated with my own work methods as a Ne-dom. She also, like me, comes up with a lot of ideas that seem to come as quickly as they go (ex: “I should buy and sell Pokemon cards - they’re a great investment!”, “I should make a YouTube channel and act out loads of comedy skits on it!”, “I love this new thing I learned about last week and I want to get a tattoo of it!”). I will say that it weirdly feels different from my Ne-Si… I can’t put my finger on why, though. I think this is either where my own type bias is confusing Ne with Se or Ne-dom with Ne-tert.

Yeah, I’d say she’s Ne, specifically SiNe with a lot of attachment to lower Ne… the “slowly chipping away at multiple songs” thing is fairly typical of SiNe; to have a lot of things going at once, but to be methodical about actually finishing them.

#question #esfj #mbti

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umihoshi · 4 years

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the more I’m rewatching the old Digimon Adventure, the more I’m disapointed in the new one =~=

I was so super hyped that they’d remake it. my 20 year long crush on Yamato is still standing. but they just moved so SO far away from the original that at this point, I think it would have been better if they had just used new characters. their personality is so paper thin that it wouldn’t have made a difference. I thought this might just be my nostalgia complaining, thinking back of something I must have glorified through the eyes of a 10 year old.

so I went and rewatch the old one. and it’s just.... so deep. so emotional. it’s by all means what they would call an ‘adventure‘. so, even though they’re completely different, here’s some comparing things that’s been bugging me:

first and far most, they can just go back and forth if they want to. the entire thrilling part of the original was that they couldn’t get away and didn’t know how to get home. it was far more focused on ‘we’ve got to survive‘ over ‘we have this world we gotta save. us 11 year olds, who can also just go to the authorities‘, (I mean, not that adults would listen, but they didn’t so much as try).

then there’s Taichi. I’m fine with him getting in contact with Agumon first before the rest, cuz he’s the maincharacter. but everything from then to now just seem so centered around Taichi. he was fucking up so badly in the old series! does anyone remember the skullgreymon problem?? it had the boy traumatized that he messed up his friend and nearly got everyone killed. but no, right now he’s doing everything totally okay, true leader, perfect shallow protag boy, might aswell do the entire thing alone and for some unexplainable reason, he can read those signs? in the old series, that would have totally been a job for Koshiro, giving it some scientific twist, rather then ‘I sorta just can‘. and the fight with Ogremon? great that Ogremon had a change of hearts so early and all, but aren’t we sort of forgetting Ogremon’s eternal rival who was very important as both an enemy and an ally??

continuing on Ogremon, his redemption was a HUGE plot point for Mimi! Mimi had always been kinda selfish and whimsical (she’s 11, come on), but at one point, she no longer wants to fight and see digimon die. because of this, she cares for ogremon, despite him being an enemy. her kindness touched him and he became an important ally in their last fight. but that’s like 40 episodes of redemption wrapped into 1 of ‘I had a good fite, mate. I feel better‘

then Yamato. oh my god, Yamato. when thinking back of Yamato, we all imagine this aloof cool distant guy who isn’t here to make friends. rewatching the original, I can only conclude: Yamato is Team Mom. he was frantically making sure everyone (mostly Takeru) was doing okay, not taking risks and being protective. Yamato’s entire character is build around the fact that he acts like Takeru needs him, while in reality he really needed Takeru to claim his place. where is this Takeru right now??

and Sora? Sora had really big trouble accepting how clingy Piyomon was to her. she has trouble getting attached to others and that was later used against her, recalling how she acted to her mother, believing she was raised in a loveless family, making her feel like she wasn’t worthy of the ‘love‘ crest. but now it’s just sorta her and piyomon being there, vibing

I really love the smooth animation, staying true to their old design, the transformations look neat and the music is on par with the old one. but the writing is just lazy and soulless, like they have vaguely browsed through the first 2 episodes, checked some character profiles and were like ‘ok, we got a global idea‘.

it really makes me sad that they had a shot to revive such a classic heartwarming story that many of us have grown up with, for the next generation to feel that same glow of friendship, accepting who you are and trusting each other... and just did whatever was easiest to sell. really disappointing...

#digimon #digimon adventure #digimon adventure 2020 #digimon 2020 #long post #digimon meta

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solacefruit · 4 years

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Writing tips, pt 1. the paratext.

Thank you to everyone who expressed interest in this little advice series! Here is the first installation: paratext. I hope you find it useful!

Please note: all writing advice is context-relevant. If the advice offered here doesn’t work for you, don’t follow it!

Paratext is the stuff around the story: the title, blurb or summary, foreword, dedication, cover of the book (if it has one), and so on. In fanfiction, paratext also includes the tags, notes, rating, and any other additional information that isn’t part of the story but is attached to the text. Paratext is almost always what people first come into contact with, which means it’s in your best interest (and theirs!) that you make what you’re providing useful. Below I’ve outlined some of the pitfalls to watch out for and some strategies to keep in mind when figuring out how to give the right details to your future readers.

Title.

Do whatever you want! It’s your title. This part is very much about your own preferences, so pick something you like.

Summary.

Don’t ever write “I’m bad at summaries.” A summary is writing, so what you’re saying with that phrase is “I’m bad at writing” and that’s a fantastic way to get your reader to not want to be your reader! They’ll go read something by someone who doesn’t talk down their own work rather than waste their time on yours. Excusing yourself from having a summary with self-deprecation--or not having a summary at all--means that you’re not actually telling anyone what your story is about, which also means that you’re probably not going to attract readers. So what are some summary options if you’re stuck?

Simple but efficient. Think of two sentences that define the conflict in your story. Try to make your first sentence set the scene with specific details, and your second sentence introduce the source of tension. For example (using a non-existent fandom), “Holly has been working in the same dead-end job for the last four years, and finally quits to join the circus. When the silver-hatted ringmaster convinces her to train the lions, however, she realises too late that she’s signed on for more than she could have imagined.” These two sentences tell a reader enough information to get them intrigued and want to read more or let them know this story probably isn’t going to be for them, which is ideally what a good summary should do.

Quote your story. My personal go-to, because it’s easy and I like the result. This method involves going through your work and selecting a passage or few sentences that really sum up your story’s overall vibe, its crucial conflict, or other meaningful or intriguing moment. You have a lot of freedom here to give the reader a taste of personal writing style and voice, and it’s a great way to show off a really killer bit of dialogue or a description you really like.

Things to watch out for: rhetorical questions, which are almost never as engaging as people seem to think. Questions like “will they survive?” or vague statements like “or perhaps she will be the bravest of them all” are superfluous if you’ve written a good summary, because often it makes the writer sound uncertain and unwilling to make bold statements about what the story will be. If you can be specific with your statements, your summary will carry more weight and likely be more interesting and attractive to your reader.

Compare these summaries from another fandom that doesn’t exist: 1. “Toby was a normal boy living a normal life with his sister. But when he finds out about wizard school, Toby’s next choice will change the world...” 2. “Toby thinks he’s a normal boy until he’s swept up into a world of magic and murder. When his sister is stolen by mysterious forces, will Toby decide to do what’s right?” 3. “Toby has an impossible choice to make: save his sister or get a scholarship to wizard school. After deciding to risk it all to save Hettie from the mysterious forces that stole her away, he thinks his dreams of wizardry are over... until a skeleton man makes him an offer he can’t refuse.”

I personally feel the third option is the most riveting as a summary, because it’s full of detail. I know a bit about Toby, I know what choice he has to make, I know the name of his sister, I know that--as expected--he decides to save her but there’s still plenty I don’t know. Who is the skeleton man? What is his offer? Why can’t Toby refuse? So many delicious questions unanswered, but without being entirely vague and shapeless as a story concept. The job of the blurb is to make the reader open the first page, and the first page’s job is the get the reader to read to the second page, and so on. Keep this in mind as you go.

Tags.

Mileage varies here, but my rule of thumb is to keep the tags list trim and only include the essentials that people might need to 1. find your work and 2. figure out if it’s what they want to read. Characters with significant speaking roles are worth listing, but not background characters (especially if the cast is large). It becomes too unwieldy and makes it harder for people to tag-search for specific characters. Likewise, it’s important to use warnings in a way that will help your reader figure out if they’re prepared to read your work--which doesn’t mean you need to list every synonym or act of abuse that’s present, for instance. In many cases, you can go, “emotional manipulation” or “abusive parenting” and that’s going to tell people who’re sensitive to that material to avoid.

Something I’ve noticed increasingly over the years is people using AO3′s tags like tumblr ones--i.e., a place to chatter--and I cannot recommend it. There’s nothing wrong with a few tags of non-essential information (it’s your work, after all!) but keep in mind that the tags do actually serve a function, and if your tags are a million lines long, not only is that frankly pretty annoying to scroll past, but also does not instill a sense of confidence in your work. If you’re looking to try to up the views on your work, keeping the tags functional and lean is one of the better ways to do that, in my opinion.

Warriors-specific advice: the allegiance list.

In theatre and books wherein it’s difficult to keep track of a huge cast of characters, it’s common to have a list of characters (or dramatis personae) in the front of the book or guide. The primary purpose of this list is to provide the viewer or reader something they can refer to as needed, to help keep characters straight in their mind. However, even in these long lists, usually only the most important characters are listed. The chorus is typically just “the chorus,” for example, and the order of the list tends to go from most speaking lines/significance in the story to least.

Something I commonly see Warriors writers do is include full allegiance lists, of four entire 20+ cat clans, at the beginning of their stories, regardless of what clan the story takes place in or how relevant this information actually is. This is learned from canon, which includes an allegiance list in every book--but canon, at least initially, didn’t actually include full lists. Into The Wild listed Thunderclan in entirety, some of Shadowclan (the cats that feature in the book), and only the leaders (and deputy) of the other two.

This more streamlined version is far easier for a reader to use, and frankly it is more likely a reader will read it if it’s not a wall of text about unfamiliar cats. Unless a full allegiance list of all your clans is vital for your story, consider cutting it down to your central clan and only the most important members of the other clans. If you think of your allegiance list as a practical tool, rather than just “something you do,” you’ll be able to make choices about when and how is the right time to use it in your story.

#advice #writing tips #if there's anything i missed or you've got questions please feel free to ask!#i hope this is helpful! i'll probably do one of these every couple of days until i've exhausted all the topics.#if you've got particular topics you'd like to see covered please let me know and i'll see what i can do. happy writing!

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supposedlyawitch · 4 years

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my natal chart

Alright I’m going to post a chart that honestly confuse the heckoroni out of me. I used the site natal chart to get a basic idea. Luckily the site explains what all the numbers and symbols mean uwu. I know I’m a fake witch.

BASIC SUMMARY OF ME THAT I COPY AND PASTED FROM THE SITE

I’m going to review it later and repost what I feel is accurate and isn’t accurate. This is a long list I know

Birth Chart

The Sun is in Cancer

Sun in Cancer natives have a strong survival instinct. They are protective of those they care about, and of themselves too. They are often quite reticent about sharing their inner selves to the rest of the world, and are often caught up in reminisce. Cancers have a reputation for moodiness, although this trait is most evident when the Moon is in Cancer. Cancer needs roots. They resist change to an extent, and concern themselves about being secure and safe in most everything they do. Cancers can be quite intrigued by objects with history attached to them -- antiques, photos, souvenirs, and the like.

Cancer is a very sensitive sign, and they don't always appreciate it when you are blunt with them. Their reactions to hurt will depend on how thick a shell they have developed. Most Cancers react by withdrawing or retreating. Some have developed an ability to manipulate others to get what they want. They avoid direct confrontations almost as a rule. Cancers are, in fact, quite yielding and soft when you have them in the right mood. They are one of the more hospitable signs of the zodiac. Sure, they can be touchy and indirect, but they are also very dependable, caring souls.

Short description:

She weighs words carefully and can be tenacious. A calm and discreet nature, tender, thoughtful, sensitive, and impressionable.

Possible issues: She is humble, timid, changeable, indecisive, lazy, or over-sensitive. Easily influenced by the family and sometimes manipulative.

Cancer with ascendant Leo

She projects a strong image, which hides a sensitive and emotional character. Very noticeable and intriguing demeanour.

Sun in XI: The Sun is in the eleventh house

You are a humanitarian who aims to treat everyone as equals. You seek to be unique and original, and you do your best to avoid bias and prejudice. Social status is less important to you than belonging to a group of diverse personalities. Your identity, in fact, is somehow linked to a larger unit than yourself. You have high hopes and goals, and tend to look at life in terms of opportunities. You have magnetic appeal, as people sense your broad tolerance and openness. The friendships you establish are crucial to your development. If you identify too much with your friendships and your friendliness, you may become too impersonal and alienate those who would like to get close to you. Successful career thanks to support of patrons, friends or relations. You are a leader in groups and people look up to you.

484 Conjunction between the Sun and Mercury

Because your ego and your mind are usually on the same page, you possess much mental energy. You are always in a position to think about what you want, and in many ways, this is an interruption of the will. You are highly intelligent with a great drive to communicate with other. You invest a lot of pride in your intellectual capacities. You may not always listen as well as you speak, however! You might be too busy thinking about what to say next. But you are very curious and although you enjoy expressing yourself, you usually don't dominate conversations completely.

As far as studying or learning goes, you are better off reading the material than listening to a teacher. These traits come from a strong need to take an active role in communications. It is very hard for you to passively listen and absorb information.

Your opinions are usually strong and you are an independent thinker. You tend to be proud of your opinions and thoughts, and might easily get a bruised ego if you are not "heard", if your opinions are pushed aside or ignored, or if your opinions are criticized. You are expressive and possibly a very animated speaker. You are also very witty and others enjoy your playful and sometimes mischievous sense of humor.

28 Trine between the Sun and Uranus

It is natural for you to question tradition. You are, above all things, an individualist. You naturally rebel against that which is established. It doesn't mean that you consistently break all the rules, but you definitely do question some of the rules, especially those that simply don't make much sense. You possess a huge distaste for routine. You work best when you have some say as to when and how you get things done. You possess much self-integrity. You avoid labeling people and are most offended when others attempt to label or stereotype you.

You easily embrace new ways of doing things, you stick up for the underdog, and you express yourself in unique and inspiring ways. You don't have to try to stand out as unique--you are original, creative, and progressive without trying. You are far from pretentious. You value honesty and truth, and you avoid putting on airs. You believe in the equality of people, and easily relate to people from all walks of life. You possess an unmistakable enthusiasm about life, and generally your life is interesting because you invite unusual or adventurous experiences into your life. You are generally appreciated by others because you are open-minded, fair, and not judgmental. Nothing really seems to faze you! You take things in stride, and are rarely shocked or taken aback by human behavior.

192 Conjunction between the Sun and Lilith

You are mostly comfortable with the darker side of your nature. A student of human nature.

The Moon is in Leo

Depending on other positions in the chart, Moon in Leo people are not necessarily outgoing. When they feel comfortable, they do like being the center of attention. That is, they like being in the "spotlight" in the comfort of their own homes and with family and friends. They enjoy entertaining others, and often take on the role of comic. Lunar Leos often feel a need to organize, and even control, their families and friends. They have an inner mission to set things right, and generally like to oversee the goings-on in their little circle.

This is a rather creative position of the Moon. At the very least, Moon in Leo people want to create and entertain. They can be rather lazy at times, and a little bossy too. Generally, though, they have a deep need to treat others fairly and justly. Lunar Leos require lots and lots of love and care in order to function well in the world. When they feel slighted, these people can be dramatic in their emotional displays. When their pride has been hurt, they are given to big scenes and sulking. This rarely happens in public, however. Lunar Leos are far too concerned about their image to make splashy scenes outside the comfort of their own homes. In public, they prefer to take things in dignified ways. At home, however, they're given to big displays of emotional drama. These scenes generally don't last too long, however. Lunar Leos are often personally popular folk who are valued for their integrity and strong sense of justice. Generally, it is easy to reason with a Lunar Lion. Appealing to their well-developed sense of fairness usually works well.

Short description:

She is brave, knowing how to take risks and possessing the courage of her convictions, honest, imposing, and sharp. She has a great sense of, and respect for, justice. Organizational sense. Selectivity with friends but is not overly influenced by them. Taste for splendor.

Potential issues: changing and numerous affections. Emotionally demanding and proud. Brooding when attention is not forthcoming.

Moon in I: The Moon is in the first house

Very sensitive. Fantasizes. She is easily touched, moved, and affected; she is sometimes shy, prudent, and emotional.

Your feelings are right out there for everyone to see, and you can come across as emotional and impatient, or nurturing and caring (or both). Your first reaction is emotional, especially if the Moon is in close proximity (within ten degrees) of the Ascendant degree. You need emotional stimulation, movement, and freedom to express yourself in order to feel happy and fulfilled. Your moods are very changeable, and this can be quite obvious to others. Because of your emotional sensitivity, you might often take things too personally, and react too quickly. Developing an awareness that others' emotions are just as important, even if they are not as overt and immediate as yours, will be important.

319 Sextile between the Moon and Venus

You are generally amiable and project a soft and yielding manner. You possess natural charm and you are highly imaginative and sympathetic. You can make an excellent mediator and go-between. You are keenly aware of your need for relationships and for intimacy. You have a well-developed respect for qualities typically associated with the feminine. People appreciate you for your tender heart and friendly, diplomatic disposition. You should enjoy a good measure of personal popularity and success in your life. Although generally considered "lucky" with relationships and with money, this is less about luck than it is about a certain level of inner peace and positive energy that attracts pleasant situations. At times you can be complacent, downright lazy, and over-indulgent in the "pleasures" of life. However, you are a peace-maker at heart and have an unusual ability to help and heal others. You are gracious and warm.

She is gracious, sweet, happy. She especially enjoys pleasure and entertainment, the Arts. She needs tenderness. She appreciates home life in a comfortable, safe atmosphere more than most.

-120 Opposition between the Moon and Neptune

She may lack firmness, and can be a sucker for a sob story! She likes to live in a dream, in the world of imagination, and can hope so much for things that reality checks can be brutal.

110 Conjunction between the Moon and Ascendant

She has a good influence on the family, and the family usually gives back, loving and helping in return. She likes travelling, movement, change. She likes contact. open to other people. Very sensitive, observant, adaptable, likable, and somewhat of a chameleon.

Mercury is in Cancer

She communicates with feeling, endearing others with words. She is reflective and has one of the best memories around. She feels people out and can be quick to pick up emotions and moods. She is discerning and full of insight, lucid, and thinks things through. She likes to please and to create a good impression. There can be a strong tendency to be influenced by those around her.

Mercury in XI: Mercury is in the eleventh house

She has lots of friends. She likes intelligent, cultivated people around her with whom she can enjoy verbal sparring. She likes debates, interminable discussions. Often has friends who are younger, or friends come and go.

You are endlessly curious about people, group interactions, community affairs, trends, and teams. You are attracted to people who bring new ideas into your experience, and who have something novel to contribute on an intellectual level. You are very forward-looking and fair-minded. Fair play, impartiality, and unselfishness are important ideals for you. There can be many changes or fluctuations in your personal wishes, dreams, plans, and ideals. You might attract friends who come and go, or who are dishonest or duplicitous.

69 Trine between Mercury - Uranus

She is perspicacious, ingenious. She binds intelligence and originality together with genius. She likes literature, especially fiction. She is spontaneous in her friendships and knows how to turn situations around positively.

49 Conjunction between Mercury - Lilith

Can be provocative in speech or communications, persuasive, interesting conversationalist, quick to see the flaws of a situation.

Venus is in Gemini

Venus in Gemini people will try to win over the object of their affection with witty conversation, displaying just how much they "know," and demonstrating their diverse interests. These lovers are playful -- some might even call them a tease. They are hard to pin down, and they resist relationships that promise to become too "comfortable." Even those with their Sun in Taurus or Cancer, whose outward demeanor may suggest some reserve and caution, will want their relationships to be stimulating and full of conversation with Venus in Gemini. Venus in Gemini people don't want to be tied or bogged down in their relationships. They appreciate lightheartedness in love. Although they are willing to talk (perhaps endlessly) about the relationship, you may get the feeling that they gloss over some of the deeper issues. In love, their tastes change often, and it can be hard to know what to expect from one day to the next (or, sometimes, from one hour to the next!).

Pleasing Venus in Gemini involves supporting their need for fun and variety, showing interest in their brainpower and knowledge, and giving them space for friends and activities outside of the relationship. Let them know just how much fun you have with them. Try not to get overly miffed by Venus in Gemini's changeable, fickle ways. Remember that time spent with your lover will be exciting and invigorating.

Venus in XI: Venus is in the eleventh house

Successful professional life in great part due to good relationships, friends or patrons. She finds love in the circle of friends.

The friendship level of your relationship needs to be genuine in order for you to sustain romantic interest. You tend to focus on a person's unique qualities -- those traits that make him or her stand out -- as the most attractive. Your relationships must possess some kind of unconventional element in order to keep your interest levels high. Calves and ankles are either erogenous zones for you, or parts of your body that are particularly attractive! You may meet lovers through group activities. Although you value friendships and group affiliations highly, you might jump into friendships without considering the responsibilities they might entail.

-69 Square between Venus - Jupiter

She is nonchalant, perhaps pretentious or self-important. She likes what is beautiful and sometimes ostentatious, perhaps spending money too quickly at times. She likes to please and can have numerous amorous adventures. She can undergo tribulations in love. May take things to excess, which sometimes interferes with a smooth flow.

She is big-hearted and warm, with an open heart and a tendency to want to give a lot to the people she loves. She can have some problems with following through on her promises, however, not usually because of any ill intent, but because she sometimes overestimates her personal capabilities, wanting to do more and give more than is actually possible. She may have a tendency to live beyond her means. She needs to be cautious about the tendency to feel overly-optimistic or overly protected. Moderation is the most important, and perhaps challenging, lesson in her life.

-29 Square between Venus - Uranus

She may look for new sensations in love and might often feel unsatisfied by connections that quickly turn into purely conventional relationships. She likes novelty, adventure, the eccentric. She is frivolous, unstable, or inconstant. Marriage is not usually for her and, if she does throw herself into this adventure, it may eventually be considered a youthful mistake. There can be numerous love affairs or off-and-on relationships. There is a tendency to react spontaneously and intensely to others, and there is marked emotional impulsiveness. Perhaps her most successful relationships are unconventional ones. She may delight in defying convention. She has considerable romantic charm and humor. There can be sudden relationship status changes, and a marked inner craving for emotional excitement.

44 Trine between Venus - Neptune

Her professional life can be creative or inconstant. She has a taste for the Arts, can be a dreamer, and may be easily influenced and romantic. She is emotional and very sensitive.

Romantic, creative, gentle, and adaptable, you naturally express the finer qualities of mysterious and dreamy Neptune in your love relationships. Your imagination is rich and your fantasy world well-developed. You are turned off by rudeness and crudeness, and are drawn to beauty in its many forms. You are very giving and generous, but may be a little on the submissive side, or sometimes downright lazy, failing to take the initiative when situations call for it.

Mars is in Cancer

This position inclines toward passive-aggressiveness. These people seem to resist change and to shy away from direct confrontations. They need to feel secure before they act. As a result, they can appear rather slow at times. Their motto is "The best offence is defense". They may appear weak to some, but they can be very strong. Their strength lies in their tenaciousness. Their sex drive can be very tied up with emotional need. At their best, they turn others on with a protective, almost therapeutic way about them. The protective nature of Cancer is best expressed when Mars in Cancer natives are turning the energy outward -- when they are being the protectors of others. Turning it inwards is when there are problems. They must avoid over-sensitivity and self-protection when it comes to sex. Some Mars in Cancer people are especially turned on by the thought of creating a baby.

These people are threatened by indifference. They can be argumentative and manipulative. Their energy levels are variable, and they can appear to move rather slowly. They have defensive reactions and bursts of emotional displays when they feel cornered. With reassurance and confidence, these natives are protective, helpful, and dependable in the long haul. They prefer to handle situations peacefully and humanely.

Mars in XII: Mars is in the twelfth house

So much of her energy goes into working life. She loves research. She could be a lab worker, doctor, police officer, teacher specializing in hospital, prison or hospice work. She can be indirect and very private. Rich dreams and fantasies.

With Mars in the twelfth house of the natal chart, you can struggle with asserting yourself in direct, natural ways in your youth, but with time and experience (and perhaps some hard work), you're likely to learn to work with this energy rather than allow it to work against you. Watch for a tendency to feel defeated before you've given something a real shot. You are extraordinarily resourceful, and you can handle many things on your own or in uniquely creative ways.

Though you may have a great deal of energy and drive, you lack confidence or the desire to put yourself and your interests first. Positively you can be very unselfish, working more on behalf of others than for yourself. You deny your own desires and needs too much, however, and you are likely to secretly become very angry, which can sabotage your finest efforts. There is a touch of the incurable romantic in your nature. Your daydreaming and fantasizing world is rich and precious to you. You also bring imagination into your sexual relationships, although you can take a bit of time to feel comfortable and to warm up to a new person in your life. Overcoming a vague and persistent feeling of guilt or doom can go a long way towards a healthier, happier approach to the pursuit of your desires.

54 Conjunction between Mars - Ascendant

She is energetic and direct.

-12 Square between Mars - Midheaven

She might suffer professional setbacks through actions that are too impulsive, imprudent, or lacking in forethought.

Jupiter is in Virgo

She attracts the most good fortune when she is helpful, honest, orderly, and pays attention to details. The service industries, nutrition, and health are prosperous avenues. Practical and technical knowledge and skills are most valued. A real problem-solver and others appreciate her help. Doesn't always feel lucky or especially ambitious. Rather, hard work is valued.

Jupiter in II: Jupiter is in the second house

Easygoing over money matters, no credit problems, this placement tends to increase her inheritance. She earns good money often without too much effort. She fully enjoys what she has.

43 Sextile between Jupiter - Saturn

She is serious, patient, honest, hard-working, orderly. Her judgment is good and she is inclined to think things over. She pursues her objectives to the bitter end, usually knowing when to choose the right moment. She is upright, usually law-abiding and respecting order.

-46 Opposition between Jupiter - Uranus

She is too independent for her own good at times, and her liberty is all-important. She may lack diplomacy, and her extravagance can be shocking to some! She likes verbal battles and may espouse extremist ideas to shock her companions. She can have a number of internal tensions.

Saturn is in Cancer

May feel fundamentally unloved and unsupported, but can miss opportunities to receive support because of the basic attitude that she isn't going to get love.

Saturn in XII: Saturn is in the twelfth house

She likes quiet and solitude above everything. She seeks work (or can work) alone, without being bothered. She is too easily distracted or bothered by chatting, outside noises.

1 Trine between Saturn - Uranus

She knows how to be on top of the situation. She perseveres, is determined but ingenious and original. She is very practical. She proceeds slowly, but is always bound to achieve her objectives in the end.

Uranus in Pisces

She is receptive, subtle but can reveal herself when asked to become involved.

Uranus in VIII: Uranus is in the eighth house

She is interested in antiquity, archaeology, history. Her financial situation has its highs and lows, which an inheritance can help out.

Neptune is in Aquarius

Generosity, especially enjoying resolving problems in order to satisfy everyone.

Neptune in VII: Neptune is in the seventh house

Partners for love, to show the depth of her passion, but may have a troubled conjugal life if the cards are not on the table.

Pluto is in Sagittarius

Great aspirations: sexuality and love are idealized.

-10 Opposition between Pluto - Lilith

She may lead a double life. She may have a secret love affair but the secret doesn't last, or at the very least there are complications. Otherwise, this aspect can point to scandals whether or not they are real.

5 Trine between Pluto - Midheaven

She can pour much of her energy into succeeding professionally. She is an authority figure and a great organizer. Strong sense of authority.

Lilith in Gemini

She can feel uncomfortable if speaking too much or too little, or for her intelligence or social skills. She may be wary of people who seem to be indulgent in these ways -- who are social butterflies or who talk too much or who seem to flaunt their intelligence. Her curiosity may have been stifled in some manner. Owning and accepting this side of the nature can be empowering. She can be wicked with what she says when angry! Shame in these areas can lead to extremes of behavior and a feeling of being out of control. Working on self-acceptance is the key to empowerment.

North Node in Taurus

She is brilliantly perceptive and easily gets close to someone. However, the tendency in the first half of life is to define her worth or value through her relationships and to be too wrapped up in others' needs at the expense of her own. Lessons are learned the hard way. Confusing and intense life situations come at the cost of comfort and peace. Her path is to discover and embrace her own values and to establish her self-worth through her own efforts. She should aim to enjoy life's quieter moments while blocking the subconscious need to create crises, as this is the way to improved relationships and greater satisfaction. Qualities to develop: patience, self-sufficiency, restraint, disengagement.

North Node in X: North Node in the Tenth House

She is sympathetic and kind, preferring to stay childlike and free. She may resist labels, responsibility, the limelight, recognition, or "growing up," but over time, this limits her growth. Qualities to develop: ambition, commitment, responsibility.

Cancer with ascendant Leo

She projects a strong image, which hides a sensitive and emotional character. Very noticeable and intriguing demeanour.

Ascendant is Leo

Leo rising people cannot help but be noticed. They radiate a special energy and magnetism that gets others' attention. Sometimes it's because they are loud people who pay a lot of attention to their personal appearance (especially their hair!); other times it's due to a regal manner that simply demands interest from others. Leo Ascendant people are very self-aware and body-conscious. They are acutely aware of others, and how they come across. In fact, these people are especially aware of their personal "backdrop"--they consider what the people they're with, and the environments they are in, do to their own image. Often, Leo rising natives feel as if they are on stage, even in the privacy of their own homes! They are given to rash decisions, temper tantrums, and excesses. However, they have plenty of staying power, drive, and their idealism keeps them from getting into too much trouble. The desire to oversee the goings-on in their circle can sometimes amount to bossiness. If this desire doesn't go too far, however, it can just mean a person who wants to make sure the people they love are all right. Many Leo rising people are managers, either by profession or character.

The tendency to overestimate things, and themselves, is generally present. This is due to a natural enthusiasm and optimism about any new undertaking. Sometimes, they are walking commercials. In fact, Leo rising people make excellent promoters. Leo rising people are generally demonstrative, and given to grand gestures. Drama comes naturally to these natives. In fact, some are so caught up in fiction, they're a little blind to fact. They have an unusual need to be admired. Leo Ascendants often have a strong physical constitution. They pay special attention to their personal appearance and mannerisms. Usually, they choose clothing and hairstyles that are youthful. Their manner is authoritarian and strong. Very full emotional life.

No matter their age in real-world terms, Leo rising people are kids at heart. They are fun-loving and warm; generous and spirited. Just how magnanimous and outgoing a Leo rising individual is will be modified by the placement of the Sun by sign and house. This is because the ruling planet of a Leo Ascendant is the Sun. For example, a Leo rising person with Sun in Virgo may not come across as strongly as a Leo rising person with Sun in Aries. No matter the placement of the Sun, however, Leo rising natives are quite self-aware and optimistic. They have a natural flair for presentation, an eye for quality, and a hard-to-resist warmth of style. They want to make things happen, and create a stir.

House II - the second house - is the area of material security and values. It rules money and personal finances, sense of self-worth and basic values, personal possessions.

Leo on House II

Financial success will be very easy thanks to the support of influential people. Tendency to spend more than what is earned. Financial progress is slow but steady. Generous with loved ones and children. Sign and house placement of the Sun may show money-making channels.

Virgo on House III

She may pull everything to pieces, analyzing, criticizing. Over-thinking and over-analyzing is probable. A busy early environment. She is proactive, tending to details and taking care of things in an efficient manner. Usually won't take on anything without examining the pros and the cons. She is very careful, sometimes to a manic extent, taking everything into account even to the slightest detail. Can be a worrier and fretter.

Libra on House IV

The simple life or the small home isn't for her. If money is a problem, she can be frustrated, wanting luxury or comfortable and beautiful things. Will spend on home more lavishly than other areas. Likes luxury goods to make life comfortable, going out, cocktail parties.

Scorpio on House V

Can get blinded by and drunk with love: everything revolves around her love. Her passions run deep, exclusive. Quarrels can result. Fertile love life.

Capricorn on House VI

Can work hard, unceasingly and patiently. Weak point: the cold, changes in temperature.

Aquarius on House VII

A slightly hasty marriage is possible. The relationship between partners will be very friendly and full of understanding. Both will love their independence, their freedom of action. If one refuses to give this to the other while insisting on it for themselves, problems ensue.

Aquarius on House VIII

An unexpected inheritance.

Pisces on House IX

She likes sea cruises. She has brilliant ideas that seem to come from nowhere.

Aries on House X

All the leadership qualities are there: authority, energy, initiative, leadership, lots of gung-ho, and of course intelligence.

Taurus on House XI

She likes to be surrounded by frank and good-hearted friends. These friendships don't stand on ceremony. She carries out everything she takes on surely, composedly, and calmly until successful.

Cancer on House XII

Problems seem to only come from the family.

#astrology #witchcraft #secular witch #natal chart #i dare you to try this #remember to tag me

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atlaskat · 5 years

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Bakugou Katsuki -- psychological analysis (meta)

I’m not a psychologist, just a social science student studying for an exam, so take this with a grain of salt.

I’m also not totally up to date with the manga (I’ve read up until volume 17). Please feel free to add your own thoughts in the replies if you want to, or call me out if I make a mistake.

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I won’t be speaking too much on biological factors, but I think it might be good to just go through some thoughts I have on the matter. In psychological theory, there’s something called “temperament”, which is essentially a child’s most basic form of relating to the world. A well-known experiment on temperament is the famous Marshmallow experiment, where small children were presented with a marshmallow. If they could wait a certain amount of time without eating it, they would receive one more. Follow-up studies on these children showed that those which showed restraint and could wait for the marshmallow had generally gotten further in life -- these children often developed the capability of making and sticking to long-term plans, and were able to work much more methodically than their peers.

I think Katsuki would be one of the children that waited for another marshmallow. At first glance, he seems very impulsive, rushing into battle and relying on his brute force -- but I’m actually very sure that this characteristic is part of his later development, and not part of his temperament. The reason I believe this is because he shows a very clear understanding of a much bigger and long-term picture. He is very committed to becoming a hero, and this commitment entails behavior which isn’t completely typical for people his age (such as studying hard, never slacking off despite his delinquent-like persona -- even in middle school --, sleeping early, training very hard to maintain his physical condition even as a young teen, etc). This shows his self-restraint, and his ability to plan ahead.

(I’m aware that the amount of pressure to do well in education is very different in many Asian countries, but compare Katsuki to for example Kaminari -- who also wants to be a hero, but is at the bottom of his class and doesn’t seem very good at planning or studying hard. What I think is most important here is to highlight Katsuki’s commitment).

I would also argue that heritability play a role in Katsuki’s personality and cognition. Intelligence and capability to learn have some hereditary factors, which I think apply to Katsuki. It’s difficult to say what came first in this regard though -- a child might be born with a slight affinity for learning (being able to memorize things quickly could be such a trait), but this doesn’t mean they become “smarter” because of it. In this specific case, the humanistic approach of “without the right support and challenge, no child will reach their full potential” is applicable.

Still, I think Katsuki was born with at least some higher capability to grasp new concepts, which I think plays a part in his, at least partial, understanding of what it takes to not just get on top but actually stay there. Quickly memorizing new information could also play a part in the way others view him -- thinking he’s skilled, amazing, even as a small child -- which in turn fuel both his willingness to learn and his ego. I think his kindergarten years are hugely important, more on it later.

The last thing I would like to say Katsuki was born with is extroversion. This personality trait can be studied in the brain -- the “reward systems” of the brain (mainly dopamine production and the middle brain as well as around nucleus accumbens) react stronger to positive emotions. I say “born with” because of its clear hereditary implications (and as I think this trait comes from his mother Mitsuki. However, it’s possible to theorize that instead of being born with extroversion, Katsuki was born more or less without neuroticism, which occurs when the activity of the amygdala is higher than normal. This leads people to be more anxious, cautious, and avoid situations which might cause unpleasant emotions). Katsuki was very young (2-4 years old) when he first began enjoying being the center of attention, which I think shows he was born with extroversion.

Katsuki’s attachment style Since we haven’t seen that many interactions between Katsuki hand his family, especially not as a child, this part will contain a lot of my own theories and headcanons, sorry about that.

Attachment styles are easily perceived phenomenons studied in depth by Mary Ainsworth and John Bowlby. Ainsworth noted that a child’s style of attachment manifests itself in two primary forms:

Stranger anxiety and separation anxiety. After 6 months of age a child will show an autonomous need to be close to, or seek comfort in, their “object of attachment”, usually a parent (often the mother). This need becomes apparent when the child is introduced to a stranger, or left alone, through signs of stress/anxiety.

Ainsworth devised a test to study these anxieties -- the “Strange Situation”. The test looks like this:

The child arrives in a new room together with the mother

A stranger appears

The child is left alone with the stranger

The stranger leaves

The mother returns

All in all this only took three minutes. The most interesting part was the child’s reaction once the mother came back -- its attachment style was most clear then.

Children usually have one main attachment style, which have two categories with a few subcategories. Secure attachment The child clearly prefers the mother to the stranger. It might cry or be anxious while the mother is gone, but stops as soon as she returns. These children go on to use their object of attachment as a secure base while they explore the world, meaning they return to seek comfort if they experience something negative, but quickly recover.

Later in life, these people can regulate emotions with more ease. They also cope better with adversity, and are able to connect better with people their age (forming deeper relationships). I believe Izuku was a securely attached child. Insecure attachment This form is more complicated. It has three main categories:

1. Resistant attachment The child has attached itself to in this case the mother, but the attachment is less stable. The child is anxious to let the mother out of sight -- doesn’t trust she will come back. The child may continue crying even after the mother returns and cradles it. 2. Avoidant attachment The child, generally doesn’t cry and doesn’t show its physical/emotional needs. Often it will act a bit aloof -- avoiding or completely ignoring the mother. It will act similarly towards the mother as with the stranger. These children have learned that their natural behaviors to attract attention from their objects of attachment will lead to rejection, so they suppress the needs for affection/comfort. More often than not they still experience the same levels of anxiety as other children, but don’t seek their parents to soothe them.

Disorganized attachment The child shows a lot of contradictory behavior, such as crying to be picked up, but immediately wanting to be let down again, often as a result of being scared of their object of attachment. People who were insecurely attached as children generally have more emotional problems, and are at higher risk for mental illness. I believe Katsuki had an avoidant attachment style. The attachment style of a child is largely based on the behavior of the object(s) of attachment, the parents. Insecure attachment is usually the result of parents not understanding/being unable to provide the comfort their infants seek. My theory is that Mitsuki is, like her son, a very determined and career-driven person. Like I’ve said before, I think she’s extroverted, but I also believe that she doesn’t easily connect deeply on an emotional level with people. This could be a result of how she herself was treated as a child -- as we tend to mimic our own parents -- or simply just her personality. Her own emotional needs might not take up a big part of her life, or she doesn’t really need others to comfort her, which in turn means she might assume others are the same. Ainsworth had a few criteria for a “good parent”:

1. Responsive 2. Permissive 3. Cooperative 4. Psychologically available

I think Mitsuki was, or is, lacking in most/all of these. Clearly, from what we’ve seen, she’s stubborn and knuckle-headed -- while she might have been responsive to baby Katsuki, she might not have known how to handle things beside his clear physical needs, like keeping him fed and clean. If she was also working during this period, as I would definitely assume (considering her job as a fashion designer and how well-off the family is; they live in a huge house), her availability might have suffered. Think like this:

- Mitsuki is tired, but has to finish work - Katsuki begins crying - Mitsuki changes his diaper and feeds him, but puts him down again to work - Katsuki starts crying after only a little while, but nothing ‘looks’ wrong (he’s fed, clean, warm, etc) so Mitsuki goes back to work - Katsuki continues crying, which frustrates Mitsuki because ‘nothing is wrong’; she might snap -- such as yelling, ignoring Katsuki further, or leaving the room entirely. As Katsuki begins to speak (let’s say at around 1,5 years), he might try to achieve emotional closeness by showing her his toys, trying to talk to her/play with her. If he is already ‘extroverted’ by this point he will be a lot more vocal than a timid child his age. If he hurts himself, or becomes scared, he probably tries to get Mitsuki’s attention at first, and I think this is where her biggest mistake might’ve lied. Based on how she treats Katsuki being kidnapped by the League of Villains I believe she disregards a lot of comfort-seeking behaviors as weakness.

“When you get down to it, you got taken and inconvenienced everybody cuz you’re so weak!!” I think this shows clearly how Mitsuki herself feels. Of course she worried for her son’s safety, but worrying about someone in itself is an inconvenience to her. She equates her own worrying with other people’s weakness -- if only people weren’t so weak, she wouldn’t have to be inconvenienced by worry. Mitsuki, like any parent, never wanted anything bad to happen to Katsuki. She was probably very aware that the world could be a dangerous place, so she tried to eradicate any ‘weakness’ within her own child so as he couldn’t be hurt by the world. I’m not sure where to place Masaru, Katsuki’s father, in all of this. A child can have several objects of attachment, but Bowlby expressed that usually there is a sort of hierarchy in the attachments themselves. For example, the child might favor one parent for playing, but prefer the other if they become scared. I think Mitsuki simply was the more important object of attachment in this case (this can be a result of having more skin-to-skin contact in the first months, or Masaru could for example have been working a lot of the time). Izuku on the other hand became securely attached to his mother Inko, as I think Inko is very emotional and open as a person. While the scene where Izuku cries about not having a quirk comes when he is about 4 years old, I still think this shows clearly that he seeks comfort in his mother. So, a little TL;DR before the next point: Katsuki was an ‘extroverted’ baby, who experienced a lot of emotional rejection from his mother very early on, which made him suppress his needs -- perhaps unconsciously starting to share his mother’s view on emotionality itself (and his own need for help at times) as weakness. Erikson’s life stages and Piaget’s cognitive development Another model I’ll be using is Erikson’s life stages as well as a theory by Piaget. We’ve passed the first life stage -- infant (0 - 1,5 years). This is where Erikson means that the child will develop a basic way of relating to the world: positive (the world is a place where my needs are met) or negative (the world is a place where I feel alone). Right before starting kindergarten I think Katsuki had developed the negative view, even though he was an ‘extroverted’ baby, as a result of his attachment style. - Izuku, on the other hand, developed the positive one. This meant he had a fundamental sense of hope for the world, which is very important later in life. The second stage -- toddler (1,5 - 3 years). Starting kindergarten is an extremely important step in Katsuki’s development. I think he would’ve been completely different without it -- I really can’t stress this enough. Avoidant-attached children will have to fulfill their needs somehow -- usually through validation from sources beside the object of attachment. ‘Avoidants’ can become narcissistic and overly confident, all as a means to protect themselves. This is exactly what happened with Katsuki, let me explain: As I’ve already explained, I think he was born with both extroverted qualities and an affinity for learning new things. His innate temperament was also perseverance. His avoidant attachment meant that it was seemingly very easy for him to be separated from his mother to go to kindergarten, although at the start, his negative view of the world might’ve made him cold/closed off. The kindergarten personnel catered to him, though. Through a lot of positive reinforcement (to which he is especially sensitive as of his extroversion), attention, and frequent intelligence-related challenges (such as new and complicated games, learning to read, etc) Katsuki developed a more positive outlook. According to Erikson, if one stage of life doesn’t “succeed”, it can be recuperated later, which I believe is what happened here. Where I think the kindergarten fell short however is with too much praise, or very easily letting Katsuki off the hook. I believe they saw very much potential in Katsuki from a young age -- perhaps because of this they were too eager to inforce how amazing they thought he was. Often times, we think that anger should be “released” and not repressed. We should get it out of our system, so to speak. However -- counter-intuitively -- we shouldn’t actually do this. Borrowing from the cognitive approach to psychology, the more often we think a certain thought or behave in a certain way, the stronger that mental connection becomes. I think Katsuki, because of his avoidant attachment, might’ve acted really aggressively as a child too. Instead of giving him strategies to cope with his anger the kindergarten teachers probably encouraged him to “release” it, which just made this cognitive scheme easier to access. Thus more likely to be activated again. Children who feel that their opinions and ideas are interesting and valuable will become more sociable, and take more charge, while children with overprotective carers will start doubting their own abilities. Where Mitsuki wasn’t able to do right, the kindergarten picked up the slack and followed Katsuki’s whims to encourage him. He probably developed really quickly, which probably stunned the teachers and carers. The adults’ attention fueled his confidence and ego, and this drew other children to him, which meant more attention.

According to Bandura and Skinner, both real consequences, imagined ones, and reinforcement dictate personality as well as social interactions. Sometimes though, something called “observational learning” occurs, in which no reinforcement is needed. A child often learns behavior by imitating something someone else does, and I’m not excluding this as a possibility to explain Katsuki’s bias/bigotry against quirkless people. Of course, cognitive bias also plays a major part here. As humans, we are wired to look for details which inforce our worldview.

Bandura’s model of reciprocal determinism. The individual and the environment affect each other mutually. This is part both of how Katsuki grows egotistical, and also his disdain for Izuku. Another important factor of personality is expectation. If an individual expects to be able to change the environment, they are more likely to attempt to do this. Without kindergarten intervention I believe Katsuki would have become a pessimistic, unmotivated person. Third stage (3 - 5 years) By this point Katsuki had already replaced his emotional needs and attachment to his mother with attention and admiration from his kindergarten peers/teachers (feeling superior to others). During this stage the child is supposed to develop a sort of pride of their own abilities. Katsuki was already an independent child (also because of being an ‘avoidant’), but this is where it might’ve went a little overboard. The development of his quirk was, as we all know, a turning point in both Katsuki’s view of himself/the world and his relationship to Izuku. This is mainly because of the quirk development. I’ve already stated that the kindergarten let too much slide -- the bullying of Izuku started even before the quirk development -- but now that becomes more important, as Katsuki was now capable of doing a lot more damage. Developing the quirk solidified Katsuki’s inflated ego -- now he was sure that he was the most awesome kid alive. It also solidified Izuku’s worthlessness to him (of course, if Izuku wasn’t useless, surely he should’ve developed a good quirk too?), which is how “Deku” came to be. At the same time, Izuku “needed help with everything”, but he was also really helpful towards others. He was sensitive, emotional, but still brave -- someone like that was worrying to Katsuki even back then. Katsuki -- an ‘avoidant’ -- repressed his needs, while Izuku indulged in them, openly showing this ‘weakness’. This is where Piaget’s theory comes in. According to the theory, people develop “schemata” and “concepts” which are cognitive structures.

1. A schema is a mental representation which covers a range of behaviors, e.g.: a child learns to pick up a bottle. It learns that it can pick up other things too, so the action of picking something up becomes a schema. 2. A concept is a mental structure which relates to the environment. A concept of an object entails for example what that object does, what it’s used for, and its relation to other objects. Children develop concepts and schemata very early on, and after that there are two processes which occur heavily in the first few years, and then continue throughout life: 1. Assimilation -- new information is modified to fit existing schemata/concepts. For example, a child making engine sounds while playing with a block of wood has assimilated the block into their concept of a car.

2. Accommodation -- the new information can’t fit into existing schemata/concepts, so new ones have to be made. This is part of changing worldviews -- let’s say a little boy only has two categories for animals: birds and fish. But then he sees a dog. If he says “that’s a fish”, he has assimilated the new information, but if he makes up a whole new category of animals, then he has accommodated the new information. There are periods of life in which a child will assimilate more than it accommodates (and vice versa). Piaget called these periods “cognitive equilibrium”. The counterpart is “disequilibrium”. This might be part of something which happens during the first few years of life -- there is an explosion of neurons, brain cells, during this time. When the accommodation has occurred, the child will go back to assimilating. Katsuki developed a lot during kindergarten, and therefore created lots of new concepts and schemata. For example, “I am awesome and everyone else is not”, is a cognitive scheme which enables one to enact their superiority over others. “Deku is useless and I can hit him” is another such concept. However, ‘Deku’s uselessness’ is something Katsuki came up with as a defense mechanism -- as stated before, Izuku indulged in (normal) behavior which Katsuki saw as weakness. But, as any child, he still experienced anxieties and wanted affection. This went against his conviction that sensitivity was weakness, so Katsuki projected all these needs onto Izuku. Punishing Izuku then became a way of punishing himself for the things he wanted. This worked for a while, but then Katsuki became aware of the fact that Izuku was brave enough to go against him, and not only that, but look down on him enough to assume he could need help. He, the most awesome person ever.

This could mean two things.

Sensitivity is not weakness, and it’s not wrong to want it

Katsuki is still so weak that even people like Izuku are a threat

Accommodation is a more difficult process than assimilation, so Katsuki avoided changing his view of sensitivity, which was so deeply ingrained, by adopting the second possibility. But this was scary, and incredibly disturbing to Katsuki, which meant the hostility towards Izuku especially grew. So this is when the bullying picked up a bit. Stage four -- 6 - 12 years During this stage most children begin going to school, the stakes and expectations are higher, etc. I believe Katsuki thrived in a school environment too, with steadily increasing levels of challenge. This is also when both Katsuki’s and Izuku’s admiration for All Might increased, for different reasons. In Katsuki’s eyes, All Might was so strong he always won no matter what, which enabled him to get in more fights. Winning these fights fueled his ego, and he began believing he could surpass All Might. Stage five -- 13 - 18 years Ooh, here’s when it gets juicy. I believe the bullying might not have been too intense back in stage 4. Erikson defined this stage as “identity against role diffusion”. During their teen years, most people begin identifying all the different sorts of roles they have in life, which might cause some anxiety. That’s why a lot of teenagers are experimenting with their identity, and go through what adults often disregard as “phases”. This searching is very important however, because every person needs to have a secure sense of “this is me” to be mentally healthy. We need to believe there’s a core in our identity, which will stay the same even if we or our surroundings change. Middle school Katsuki and Izuku are both 14 when the series starts. Katsuki is still delusional, prideful, and narcissistic. His teachers think he is powerful enough that it’s inevitable he will go on to UA, which only confirms his view of himself. Right now he tries to act unbothered, but Katsuki is painfully aware of the fact that Izuku hasn’t abandoned the dream to be a hero, even though he is quirkless. All of Katsuki’s intimidation tactics -- blowing up the notebook, for example -- are all desperate attempts to discourage Izuku from even trying, because Katsuki is still scared and disturbed by Izuku in general. Perhaps more so than usual, because I think Katsuki’s trying to find his identity right now as well, especially since it’s time to apply to high school. “Leaving Izuku behind” might be the most symbolic thing Katsuki can think of. He feels as though he’s been stuck with Izuku for years, and wants to hammer home the differences between them, defining his own identity in the process. Still, Izuku is going to apply to UA. I know Katsuki looks pretty unbothered while telling Izuku to take a swan dive off the roof, but I’m 100% certain he’s absolutely shaking inside. It really is a last resort type of thing. Which doesn’t make it alright, of course, but I think it’s important to keep in mind that Katsuki by this point is a vulnerable young teen, unconsciously terrified of going into the world without knowing exactly who he is. Izuku’s response to this bullying and especially the swan-dive line are interesting to me. He doesn’t get depressed, instead he thinks to himself that the idiot Kacchan would have instigated a suicide if he really went through it. This is partly why I think Izuku is securely attached to his mom, even if he now doesn’t approach her with all his problems. He developed a strong sense of hope for the world, more on that in a bit. The Sludge Villain incident is a big stepping stone for both Katsuki and Izuku. We see Izuku genuinely almost give everything up after meeting All Might, and still, even as he saw someone who had bullied him, he still rushed in without a second thought as soon as that person seemed to need help. And in reality, Katsuki was asking for help. You can’t say this isn’t the face of someone who needs saving.

Of course, Katsuki catches up with Izuku just after the incident, telling him “I didn't need you to save me!”, the works.

He’s struggling really hard here to assimilate the new information. He doesn’t want to accept it. When he fell into the creek back as a child, I don’t think he actually needed any help, he probably would’ve been fine. The problem then was Izuku thinking he needed help, which he equated to being looked down upon. In this moment, the problem is that Katsuki really needed the help. Had Izuku not been there, not spurred All Might into action, Katsuki might very well have suffocated. And he knows this, he’s a smart kid. That’s why his reaction is so extreme this time. Accepting that he could’ve died if Izuku wasn’t there means, again, that there are two possibilities to Katsuki:

1. He is weak and needs Izuku’s help of all people 2. He has been wrong about sensitivity all along Both of these mean he has been wrong, both are unacceptable to him. But I think the first one, at least unconsciously, does become its own schemata. Some time after the incident Katsuki stays silent when it’s again noted that Izuku is applying for UA. On the first day there, he only tells Izuku to get out of his way, but doesn’t mock or question his presence. Izuku even comments that “ever since that day, he stopped tormenting me.” They even sit beside each other without any real problems. I think this again is due to two things: 1. Katsuki is hyper-focused on his real goals right then, he needs to do really well 2. He has accepted “Deku is applying for UA” as a new schemata, which is easier to swallow than accepting either the sensitivity or needing help thing.

High school -- UA There’s of course a minor hitch once Katsuki realises Izuku was accepted, but I think that’s fairly standard. What I think is more important for Katsuki is the fact that entering UA means coming into contact with other people his age who are more advanced than he would’ve ever thought. He’s been so far up that nobody could catch up to him for years, but suddenly, other people are merely steps away if not on the same level. The fact that other people are so close to surpassing him, and seeing Izuku has somehow developed a powerful quirk, opens the gate to the possibility that Izuku might surpass him too. As many have noticed, Katsuki is much more subdued since starting at UA. I think he’s beginning to warm up to other people (they’re not scared of him, he can’t dominate them like that). But I think his anxiety has slowly been growing, leading to the outburst/fight at Ground Beta, with All Might’s retirement as a final straw. I want to analyse him further (and even more how he’s affected by avoidant attachment!!!), but this will have to do for now. Please let me know what you thought, if you agree, if you’d like more, etc. It’s really encouraging. Have a nice day!

#long post #bnha #bnha meta #bnha psychology #psychology #bnha analysis #katsuki bakugou #bnha bakugou #kacchan #midoriya izuku #deku #bnha deku #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #bakudeku #psychological analysis #mitsuki bakugou

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tidustargaryen · 4 years

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The Last of Us Part II - A unique experience you can never get rid of (My interpretation of the story - Full of spoilers!!!)

I made some screens of the game, but I messed up while forgetting to remove the black frame of options from photo mode. I was so proud of the screens! ^^ Sorry. 🙇

Wow...Wow...Wow... 🤩🤩

I couldn't not talk about this game, and what it felt like to play it.I went through all the emotions, I smiled, I cried, I screamed, I laughed, I was scared, I was anxious, I sang, I felt anger, even hatred, but also compassion, pity, empathy and the desire to forgive and forget. They broke my heart, and then filled it with rainbows. It was really the roller coaster of emotions. That's what I wanted when I bought this game. I wanted to feel things, a whole lot of things. I wanted to smile, I wanted to laugh, but I also wanted to cry. Because crying is not necessarily negative. It's a human emotion that also does good things.

I love Red Dead Redemption 2, I played it a lot, but I didn’t have the need to put words on my feelings. And especially not to give it such praise, that is to say how much The Last of Us Part II affected me. I also find it hard to describe my thoughts, my feelings in another language, and the review took me time and effort. There will surely be plenty of mistakes, but I love this game too much not to grant it the honor it deserves.

The job is successful, it's more than successful, this game has affected me deeply, in a positive way. When I put the controller down at the end of the game, wow... Just wow... That's all i could think of. And I must confess, I don't understand the negative feedback. I understand of course, that you can dislike a scenario, I myself dislike some movies, we like, we dislike, for different reasons, it's our most legitimate right. But hatred for a game? Putting a zero grade on it? It's not objective. The gameplay is excellent, much better than the first one, the immersion is incredible, the visual and sound atmosphere... damn! The motion capture is unmatched. More weapons, more actions, more everything.The graphics, the dialogues, the music! Even if the scenario is not good for you, you have to admit that the rest is almost perfect... So it's impossible to put 0 to this game. It may not please you, it's legitimate, but when I don't like something, I leave it, I don't spend days talking about it, in a bad way. I would also add that reading the leaks is one thing, playing the game, living the story with the controller in hand is something else. Maybe you're missing out on something huge, it's your choice.

If I say that, it's above all because I would really like a third opus, I want other stories with Ellie. I liked her in the first one, but I got so attached to her in the second part. And I like the world of the Last of Us, I got attached to the Ellie/Dina relationship as well, and I'll come back to that in the development I'm going to do on the characters right after.

All that to say, for anyone who didn't like The Last of Us Part II, your life is not going to change whether or not there's a part III, but I, and other players, would really like a sequel. But I'm not sure there's going to be one after this outpouring of hatred. So good for you, so bad for us, I guess. But I'm not selfish.

I've also seen some very positive comments, a lot of “masterpieces” and objective opinions, full of very good reviews from players who have had the same experience as me. I've played a lot of games that I liked, very few of them made an impression on me like The Last of Us Part II, none of them made an impression on me like The Last of Us Part II in fact, thank you Naughty Dog. Really, thank you, because, and this is my personal opinion, this sequel is much better than the first opus. Yes, that's what I think, and I had heard and seen a lot of press reviews that said it was better, I couldn't believe it. And yet, since I finished the game, I can't stop thinking about it, I can't stop rewriting the story, imagining a sequel, and that's what I wanted this game to do, to touch me emotionally, quite simply. This game haunts me since I press “start”. Well done, I admit.

Spoilers, ahead.

They didn't lie on this, I knew what game I was buying. A violent game, which deals with difficult subject, revenge, hate, the worst human emotions. It's hard for the players to understand the choices they made in the script, but it's also because it's hard to imagine living in a world like The Last of Us. Anyone can die at any time. And the survival instinct brings out the worst in humans. In their world, we too would become violent, hateful, we would do anything to survive. We will do the same things as Abby, Ellie, Joel and everyone else. Yes, it would be so much simpler, and more productive, to cooperate, to be united, this is the solution, the only one. Unfortunately, humans do the contrary, because the fear of the other, of the unknown, makes one strike before being struck. Already, in our current world, people find it very difficult to show solidarity, there is solidarity, but how many there are out of billions ?? They said it would take an open mind to enjoy the game, and understand the choices of characters. And they were right.

The game could have dealt with the story of a father and his adopted daughter, wanting to survive in a cruel world full of infected people who want to devour you, but who are not the worst enemies. It would have shown these characters succeeding and living a happy life in the town of Jackson... and it could have been believable, why not, with a big stroke of luck... Because honestly, in a world like this, where anybody can die at any time, realism is very important. The worst thing that could have happened to this game is not hate, it's indifference, and the game does not leave indifferent, far from it. People still haven't understood that to show disappointment in a game, a movie, a series, or whatever, hatred is not the solution, but indifference. Hatred proves that you are interested enough in the subject to talk about it a lot. This is indifference, the opposite of love.

Because, yes, in this world, you can die very cruelly, horribly, just like Joel... It's hard, it hurts, but it's realistic. When I first played the first opus, at the end I said to myself "If there's a sequel to this game, Joel will pay harshly for the consequences of his decision..." Because Joel's choice was selfish, it was very human, but it was very selfish. I love Ellie so much that I'm thrilled, but he saved a little girl that he cared so much about, a love that he didn't think he'd feel since he lost his little girl. But tell me, how many other little girls has he sacrificed in the process? How many people has he forced to live in such a terrible world? This vaccine could have saved them all. It’s unthinkable to me that the surviving Fireflies wouldn't want revenge. And it's even more natural to want revenge on the murderer of your father.

Yeah, I wish Joel would've survived, or not died so cruelly, especially not in front of Ellie. But Joel is paying the consequences for his choice. It's hard to put yourself in that position, but I don't think I would have made the same choice Joel did. And maybe, when you think about it, was it better for Ellie to die saving the world, rather than go through all that she had to go through next ?

The Last of Us part II, it's clearly not a game where everything is white or black, the development studio took a big risk, making us play inside the head of the person we're supposed to hate, the one who took Ellie's dearest love. Most games make us play nice people, who fight against the bad guys, but here, the bad guys aren't always bad, they can do good deeds, and bad ones, just like Ellie. These shades of grey in each character are very interesting to study, the story becomes more complex, more captivating. Joel wasn't a "good guy" either, he did a lot of bad things before he crossed Ellie's path, he ambushed people to kill them and steal from them... That doesn't stop us from loving him, it's also true for Abby and her companions.

That's what I love about this game, the nuances. The questioning of the character choices, and the morality that's built into it. And for me, this game is clearly an essay about what makes us feel and what drives us to hatred and revenge, and what we get out of it... Nothing, as we can see with my poor girl Ellie. She brutally loses Joel and in her quest for revenge, loses everything else.

There's clearly no way in hell she's going back to Jackson, she's leaving, for good, and alone.Besides, we saw her head toward the door at the back, not the one on the side, which leads to Jackson. And when she walks with JJ, towards this door, she tells him that only bad things are behind this door. No, unfortunately, Ellie does not return to Jackson, and that is understandable. This quest for revenge has affected her deeply. For me, it's like a stain on her soul. Is it legitimate for her to want revenge? I think it is. Should she give in to hatred and revenge? Of course, in this story, for Ellie, the answer is no. "I'm gonna find, and I'm gonna kill every last one of them," I think she could've added, "No matter what it costs me." Her future happiness. Neil Druckmann brought up a possible part III, and perhaps this part could imply a redemption from Ellie. She tells JJ that behind this door there are only bad things, maybe in the end, she goes to these bad things, to try to destroy as much as possible. And to finally be able to do what Joel stealed from her, and finally answer this question of why she is immunizing, why her ? To save people.

Ellie can't move on. She has a lot of nightmares, she's been through a trauma and can't get over it. Despite the peaceful life she has with Dina and JJ, she is not happy, at least not entirely. Part of her has stayed in that house near Jackson, on the ground where Joel died cruelly. And that part she'll never get back, and she doesn't know it, but even killing Abby wouldn't change anything. Ellie lost too many people, and Joel was the one person she couldn't lose. But even if she doesn't give in to the last siren of vengeance, the damage is already done. After Nora, whom she tortures for information, Owen's death and his pregnant girlfriend, it's too late. Not to mention all the other people she had to kill to get there. It's not without consequences,the guilt is too big,for what she did to those people and also for Joel,who she feels she has to avenge,rightly or wrongly,out of love,out of loyalty, or both.

And it's very clear when she kills Owen and then Mel. Of course, she's just defending herself, she didn't want to kill them, she just wanted to know where Abby was. And most of all, she didn't know Mel was pregnant, and in that moment, she knows she's gone too far, that her revenge cost her too much. But it's really when she sees Jesse die, when she thinks Tommy's dead, too, and she almost lost Dina, that she gives up on revenge, for now. She chooses a quiet life with Dina, but Tommy won't give it up, and Ellie is still very affected by Joel's death.

She must avenge Joel, even if it means losing everything, she will find Abby. She'll finally give up on killing her, and I completely agree with that choice. All this was for nothing? Well, yes, because Ellie realized too late that revenge would never heal Joel's death, would never make up for her great loss, and that Abby's death wouldn't bring Joel back. The problem is, she realizes that too late, she already lost everything else, including herself.

As far as I'm concerned, she knows the farm will be empty, she just needs to go back, as if the last bit of happiness she has left is in this house. And maybe, with a spark of hope, that the person she loves the most after Joel, hasn't abandoned her. I think she also thinks that Dina and JJ deserve better than her, someone who got lost on the path to revenge, a ghost of the Ellie that Dina fell in love with.

Yeah, it's not a happy story, but that was never the point. I think it's hard to imagine the world they live in compared to ours. This is not a world where happiness exists, and if it does exist, it is hard to find, let alone keep.

The game did something very daring, making us play Joel's killer. It's ballsy, isn't it! And yes, bad guys have a life, a story, and a reason to do what they do. They're just as human. I hated Abby, that's a strong word, but I wish Ellie had killed her right then and there, and then I was forced into her head. Abby lost her father, and so did Ellie. Joel killed Abby's father, and she killed Ellie's father. An eye for an eye? A lot of people hate Abby, so I'm going to put it another way. Would you have let your father's killer live? Abby couldn't. It's very legitimate, I wish she'd killed him quickly, his death was cruel. But as much as Joel's choice... All the loss, all the hardship, all of it could have been stopped with the vaccine. All because of Joel. Maybe you wish she would've kissed him and thanked him?

And yet, she spares Ellie and Tommy and Dina, something she's gonna regret, by the way. Because, later, Tommy kills Manny, her best friend. And Ellie kills Owen, the man she loves. And once again, in spite of that, she spares Ellie again. This time, her mercy will save her life, when Ellie delivers her from this new group of slavers she meets. (Ellie the breaker of chains xD) Abby doesn't want to fight anymore, doesn't want revenge. She gives up punishing Owen and Mel's murderer, and their babies, and also the others. (If Abby knows about Nora, etc.)

She knows what it cost her to take revenge, it didn't bring her father back, it didn't ease her grief, and that caused the death of her closest friends, when Ellie, in turn, wanted get revenge. The price is too high. I had no particular affinity with Abby, but I understand her character. In her quest for revenge, Abby only kills the man responsible for her father's death, when Ellie wanted to kill them all, and kills many. Abby also has her bad choices, she condones Isaac's torture methods which are just horrible, but her revenge has not controlled her like she did to control Ellie. Punishing the one responsible was enough, but not for Ellie.Yes, at the beginning, I wanted Abby to die, and kudos to the developers, because at the time when Ellie had her hands around her neck, I had only one thought, let her live, please… Well done to make us pass from a desire for revenge to an act of pity.Yes, Ellie made the wrong choice, but could she make another one? In a world like that, I don't know, it's very difficult to imagine the impact of such a harsh universe on our psychology. But it shows that revenge brings nothing, it takes everything. And hatred also does nothing good, especially if it is your main driver.

This is a great lesson that the developers are giving us, it pushes us to question certain morality, and that was their goal. Our world is also filled with hatred, and some people give in to it so easily. I don’t understand how you can feel all this hatred for people who just created a video game ... Isn’t there a bigger fight in the world? Racism, homophobia, slavery (yes, yes it still exists), pedophilia, rapists, misogynists, the people who govern us, the powerful who buy everything with money, animal and family mistreatment … Why waste time on developers whose only fault is wanting to create a game to entertain people? Were they not successful for you? Go on to something else. And I'm not even talking about everyone who hates the game without ever even playing it. It's just a game. There are more serious things that deserve your anger, don't you think?

This is my opinion and I give it with all the objectivity I can. If the game was bad, I would not have wasted time writing all of this in another language, I would have moved on but that is not the case. Yes this game is huge! And even more because it highlights things that some people want to hide. Personally, I loved that the two characters we play are female! Especially on such dark themes !! It's always for men... two women, who want revenge, who gives in to the darkest and most human emotions. Not men, finally. Thank you Naughty Dog. A gay heroine! I love, and I don't understand all the controversy around LGBTQ propaganda ... So, according to this reasoning, do other games make heterosexual propaganda ?? And gay people have to go through this ?! It's a shame !

No, I'm not gay, I have no personal interest in defending it, just the freedom of everyone to be able to live. It is out of the question that people live unhappy all their life, just so as not to shock people who are too closed to understand that the sexual life of others does not concern them ... More games like that please, and with men too… because homosexuality in the media is often represented by women.

I also didn't understand that we can take offense for the visit to a synagogue ... Should we blame Assassin's Creed for all the cathedrals in which we did stunts and break a lot of things ??

Again, everyone has the right to like or not like the game, but I don’t think you should be so disrespectful of all those people who worked hard on this game. Especially when it’s unwarranted. And I know something about it, I watched GoT season 8, I know what it's like to betray the soul of a story Clearly, this is not the case, here. I’ve seen some very constructive reviews explaining how amazing this game is, but it couldn’t please everyone, and I’m sorry for all those who didn’t like it (those who played well sure, the others are not legitimate for me) but don’t prevent us from enjoying this game, especially if we can have a sequel.

I needed to put all my thoughts on my keyboard, and on my blog, because as I said at the very beginning, this game affected me deeply and it is, for me, the best game I ever played. (sorry RDR 2, sorry Arthur, but Ellie gave you a nice slap there 😋 ) I highly recommend it! However, I know that it cannot please everyone, like all works of art, it’s subjective.

I would like to end with my favorite scenes, no matter they made me smile or cry, because there are really magic and unforgettable moments. Not necessarily rank in order of preference.

- The guitar scene with Dina. The cover of "Take on me" which is just beautiful, I still listen to it often, and it's a moment of peace (like the giraffes in the first one) in this terrible world.

- The scene where Joel takes Ellie to the science museum. Same, wonderful moment in this world of brute. And a wonderful gift from Joel to his daughter. I'm still crying. And that is to bring it perfectly, they could have put this scene to us before his death, it would not have had the same impact. After Joel's death, it hits where it should.

- Of course, the scene where Ellie and Joel talks about his choice to save her. This moment, or Ellie tells him that she can't forgive him yet, that she may never be able to, but that she wants to try, I think that is also one of the reasons why Ellie doesn't want to give up on revenge. Joel died when she still resented him, and they were both on cold terms. She can't forgive herself.

- The scene where Dina offers her her bracelet, I love this bracelet.

- All the null jokes of Ellie !!!! xD

- I cry when Ellie thinks that Dina could leave her for Jesse. And then after, when she comforted her.

- The scene at the farm, when Ellie is walking with JJ, I loved it, she seems happy, but shortly after, we realize that this is not the case, or rather, that something is missing, or someone… The scene of the return to the farm, for me has made it harder, already because it's the end, because Dina is no longer there, even if it was easy to imagine. And the scene where it seems to me that she plays the song that Joel sang to her. She lost him, And then she lost herself. The song he sang to her at the beginning sums it all up. This is the saddest scene for me. In the first game, Ellie told Joel that all the people she has ever loved are dead or have abandoned her. She finds herself alone, and it's partly her fault.

Various :

I hate having to hit Ellie while playing Abby, especially with her arms so big, she must hurt very much!! I'm not a fan of tattoos but Ellie's is just beautiful! I would like to visit a little more Santa Barbara, it changes from Seattle ^^But Seattle is really beautiful. The lifespan of the game is enormous and the difficulty much bigger than the first one. In normal mode I sometimes suffered a lot ^^ Naughty Dog has dared to model the penises of the infected !!! (Yes, I took photos, no I would not show them xD)

The first game had given us a tragic death from the start, Sarah. She is the first playable character for a very short time, and we are just walking with her. And witness helplessly at her death. The second game does the same, but it’s her father who dies this time just after we play a little with him, just for a horse riding with Tommy. Poetic ?

Yes, the game has faults, some bugs, some passages are long, but given the quality it offers us, personally, I forget these faults, nothing is perfect, nothing needs to be.

And the only criticism I have of this game is that I wanted to play with Ellie a bit more (it's relative, the game still has a long life, but I'm greedy, I wanted more of Ellie). I really want to play with her again and I hope that where she goes, she will be fine. I liked her in the first opus, I love her now. She enters the top of my favorite fictional characters, with Daenerys Targaryen, Ellie in second place, and Arthur Morgan (sorry for your second place big boy 😋 ) And I now understand the Youtubers who said that they envied us for still having to discover the game and the scenario. Now, I wish I could forget it and find out again. What is certain is that I will not be able to say goodbye to Ellie, impossible. She deserves a very, very big hug after everything they've done to her.

I haven't read the leaks, I haven't been spoiled at all, and I hate that. I trusted a Youtuber when the fans started to hate the game, without ever playing it, and I was right. For those who compare The Last of Us with GoT: I read the leaks of GoT, I was happy to have done it given the parody they did of the show, I would have really regretted having read the The Last of Us part II leaks. Reading and living the game are two different things.

I probably forgot some things, I will do a second part, I may add things later.

This game is simply and deeply human. In these most beautiful qualities, and especially in these worst flaws.

Best game ever. My opinion.

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yogaadvise · 4 years

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Scientific Research: How Yoga Works

Whether you've been exercising yoga for eventually or one years, you've likely heard some pretty lofty claims concerning what yoga exercise can do for you psychologically, literally, and spiritually. From helping people with clinical depression to aiding people slim down, yoga is a remarkable exercise that is rooted in old thoughtful knowledge. As well as while that wisdom was penciled by Patanjali in the Yoga Sutras long ago, the approach of yoga exercise is still an open cannon. One point Western science and medication is adding to that open cannon are a number of clinical researches that prove what yogis have actually intuitively really felt as well as recognized for hundreds of years.

Introduction To A New Yogic Study

In the last 10-15 years, there have actually been many research studies centered on yoga it can be hard to maintain track. One especially fascinating research study was done by reasearchers at Boston College of Medicine in May of 2012. The research was run by Christ Streeter, PhD and had a hugely long title: 'The Study: The Impacts of Yoga Exercise on the Autonomic Nervous System, Gamma-aminobutyric-acid, as well as Allostasis in Epilepsy, Anxiety, as well as Post-traumatic Stress And Anxiety Disorder.' While that title is fairly a mouthful, it's certainly worth considering. Basically, Dr. Streeter had an interest in seeing just how yoga manages the nerves, as well as what she located was fascinating. Particularly, yoga exercise controls the nerves by increasing vagal tone, which is the mechanism the body uses to control stress.

Etymology and also Meaning of the Vagus Nerve

For something so vital, the vagus nerve is quite tiny. Or else called the pneumogastric nerve, the vagus nerve is the tenth cranial nerve. According to Wikipedia, the nerve has parasympathetic control of the heart, lungs, as well as digestive system. The word 'vagus' originates from the Latin language, and implies 'wandering.' This etymology kind of make good sense thinking about the number of areas of the body the vagus nerve attaches to. The vagus nerve is just one nerve on the automated worried system along the spine, however it is the longest.

What Does The Vagus Nerve Do?

The vagus nerve serves lots of features in the body. It is located just at the base of the back and also links to lots of organs. It is in charge of your heart price, sweating, intestinal peristalisis, and the movement of mouth muslces that enables you to speak. The vagaus vigor additionally attaches to the internal ear, as well as if you have ever before coughed while cleansing your ears with a cotton swab, that is an instance of the vagus nerve at work.

Perhaps one of one of the most essential results the vagus nerve has is it's connection to the heart. The vagus nerve regulates the heart rate and also is turned on throughout times of intense emotional stress. Throughout these times, there can be a sudden decline in cardiac output, temporary loss of bladder control, and also the start of depression.

What is "Low Vagal Tone"?

If you have reduced vagal tone, you could discover you are much more at risk to stress and also suffer from things such as weak food digestion, an uneven heart price, and also extreme state of mind swings. Reduced vagal tone is highly connected to problems like chronic stress and anxiety, clinical depression, stress and anxiety, and also body pain. As if those problems are not bad sufficient, reduced vagal tone is also associated with cardiovascular disease, solitude, negativeness, inflammation, as well as total inadequate psychological health and wellness. Lots of people who have suffered from chronic diseases experience a reduced vagal tone. In addition, reduced vagal tone is connected to problems like epilepsy and trauma. Luckily, no matter what your constitution is, you can tone your vagal nerve using yogic exercises.

What Are The Advantages Of Toning The Vagus Nerve?

Believe it or otherwise, some individuals have actually a naturally toned vagal nerve. These people have a tendency to be more resistant towards tension and have a simpler time maintaining their mind and body in equilibrium. One essential function of a person with a healthy vagal tone is that they can alternative in between states of enjoyment and leisure without getting upset. In general, healthy vagal tone is connected to psychological security, reduced swelling, healthy and balanced digestion, and also a decreased risk of heart attack.

It made use of to be that if a human being experienced tension in the wild, it was over within a couple of mins or perhaps seconds. With the development of innovation and also the needs of modern life, stress is a lot a lot more prevalent. It is feasible to feel the variation of vagal tone throughout your life. When you have high vagal tone, you will be able to stabilize the inevitable changes life brings with more energy as well as ease. According to Dr. Steerer that carried out the research study, 'Western and also Eastern medication enhance one another. Yoga is recognized to enhance stress-related nerve system inequalities'.

What Are The Impacts Of Uncontrolled Stress?

If you are among those individuals that believe that tension is an inescapable part of life, think about how harmful anxiety truly can be to your body. Whether you operate in a requiring task or have a whole lot of economic pressure, it is very important to analyze methods to lower your stress and anxiety. Why? The fact is, stress is not only unsafe, the impacts can really be passed down to your off-spring, making them more susceptible to anxiety in their life. Simply check out this documentary, Stress and anxiety Picture of an Awesome. In the documentary, scientists damage down how tension affects your immune action and causes the damage of your brain.

Stress can reveal up as a myriad of symptoms. It can activate headaches, depression, heartburn, sleep problems, stomachaches, as well as fertility issues. Tension also releases a load of chemicals in your system that raises high blood pressure as well as blood sugar, and boosts the danger of cardiac arrest. Dealing with as well as eliminating sources of anxiety are essential, your life may depend on it! Doing points like strengthening your vagal tone through yoga exercise can supply an unbelievable benefit in your life. As verified in the study by Dr. Steerer's research study at Boston University Institution of Medication and numerous others, the physical positions, breath job, and also reflections utilized in yoga can transform your life.

Yoga Asanas That Tone The Vagus Nerve

In the research conducted by Dr. Steerer, the researchers examined a handful of practices that they believed would enhance vagal tone. While lots of techniques were tested, one of the very first was resistance breathing, or else referred to as ujjayi pranayama breathing. This sort of breathing is traditionally carried out in Vinyasa yoga courses or during the Sun Salutations series. There are several methods to increase vagal tone making use of yoga practices. The vagus nerve is located at the base of the skull, but prolongs to the breast and heart area. Any yoga exercise presents that send out power to the vagus nerve will consequently boost your circulation as well as lung capacity.

Inverted Yoga Poses

Inversions are unbelievable for enhancing the vagus nerve, as well as in contrast to popular belief, you do not have to be extremely lover or a professional yogi to do them! An upside down yoga exercise present is any pose that modifications your body's partnership to gravity. Some fantastic instances of mild inversions consist of Legs Up the Wall and also Shoulder Stand. Both of these inversions are exceptional for lowering stress as well as can be practices by nearly everybody. An additional excellent inversion to attempt is Handstand, this position is extra stimulating than Upper hands the Wall, yet provides much of the same advantages. It's additionally a great position for treating depression.

Backbend Yoga Poses

Backbends can add a wonderful lightness to your yoga method. They aid boost as well as energize you as well as they likewise are terrific for balancing hormones. This might be as a result of how backbends connect as well as promote the vagus nerve. Some terrific backbends to include in your yoga technique are Complete Wheel Pose and also Camel Pose. If you are just starting out with yoga exercise or if you have a delicate back, you can additionally make use of a yoga exercise reinforce to do mild backbends, or try doing your backbends over a chair. You can also turn standing poses like Mountain Posture and also Tree Position right into mild backbends by raising your arms up and back.

Flow Sequences

Considering that researchers in Dr. Steerer's research study looked especially at ujjayi breathing, any kind of sort of Vinyasa or circulation yoga is mosting likely to do wonders for your vagal tone. Especially the Sun Salutations, as those incorporate slight backbends and conscious breathing, both of which are verified to assist alleviate anxiety. As verified in the research study, Vinyasa yoga exercise boosts the vagus nerve with carefully timed inhales and also exhales, and also triggers the parasympathetic nervous system. In addition, a circulation sequence is the best technique to heat your body up for inversions.

Pranayama

One of the most common referrals for promoting the vagus nerve is with vibrant diaphragm breathing. When your body is in battle or trip setting, your breathing is quick and superficial. To switch over right into the parasympathetic nerves as well as activate the vagus nerve, try pranayama after you have actually opened up and heated your body with yoga exercise asanas. One approach that is excellent for launching saved injury is to take a breath deeply in, hold for a count of 3, and exhale longer than the inhale. Concentrating on the exhale and also lengthening it will change you right into parasympathetic activation.

#iyengar yoga #pranayama #prenatal yoga #spiritually #types of yoga #vinyasa yoga #yin yoga #yoga #yoga alliance #Yoga Asanas #yoga music #yoga nidra #yoga poses #yoga sutras

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theprodigypenguin · 5 years

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A8 jegulus (can it end well? Love your work!!)

A: Angst - 8: “Am I not enough for you?”

Whoo boy I was determined to finish this before going to bed. I started watching The Great British Baking Show and got SO distracted (for the record I’m glad Diane is gone and Iaine didn’t deserve to get sent home because that fucking BITCH literally sabotaged him). Anyway. This almost got too deep for me, but I managed to rein it in a bit. The information collected about Abandonment Issues was found on this website. Enjoy!

Regulus had abandonment issues. At least that’s what he read in the Muggle help book he’d found sitting on his usual table tucked into the furthest back corner of the library.

It was circular and hidden between tall bookshelves filled to spilling over with outdated textbooks and scrolls that had been shoved there once they’d lost their use. Regulus found some comfort and solidarity by taking that table, because no one else ever seemed to use it. It was too musty back there, there wasn’t enough light because the old glass was cloudy and likely hadn’t been washed in centuries. Regulus figured he was the only person who ever sat there, but the hard cover self help book he’d found sitting there was arguably not his.

At first he was bothered by the fact that someone had stolen his secret space, tainting it with pointless Muggle items. He’d wandered back there in the middle of the day in a horrible mood, silently seething and shaking as he kept his head down and avoided Madam Pince by sliding down the side aisle while she was organizing books at her desk. He wanted seclusion, he wanted to curl into the chair with his feet pulled onto the cushion and the hood of his cloak pulled onto his head and down over his eyes so no one who passed by would see the angry tears cutting down his cheeks as he wrapped his arms around his knees and muffled the sounds of frustrated sobs against his trousers.

It was infuriating, being James Potter’s secret boyfriend. When they’d started their relationship, Regulus had known it would be behind curtains, secret rendezvous up in the Astronomy tower at midnight, sneaking out together to lounge on the grass at the edge of the Black Lake, wrapped around each other and laughing over silent jokes, indulging in each other when no one else could see, testing each other, seeing what was right, what they were comfortable with.

Both of them accepted no one could really know about them, but they were fine with it. Regulus was fine with it. It gave him a feeling of true elation to know he was the one who was dragging his hands down the plane of James’ stomach as the talented Quidditch Chaser pinned him to the wall hidden behind a tapestry barely big enough to hide them. Regulus was the one tasting James’ lips and feeling the texture of his hair between his fingers. James was his, and no one knew it, and that was exciting. A silent rebellion on Regulus’ part, because when he was snogging James senseless, half of him was feeling the brutal smugness, knowing how furious his parents would be, revolting in such a damning way.

It was a game, but every day, every week they spent in a decided relationship, the hesitant touches growing more confident and the curious eyes darkening with resolution had Regulus weak. It was just a game, but he was enjoying himself far too much. He liked it too much. He liked James too much. Falling like he’d been hit in the chest with a Bludger and toppled off his broom a hundred feet in the air with the Golden Snitch clutched above his heart, hoping to everything James would be the one to catch him. Regulus liked him.

Maybe that was why it was so painful, a hot iron twisted into his gut, seeing James standing so close to that Evans girl with a brilliant smile on his face, leaning one shoulder against the wall with his arms folded, looking too cocky, too confident, too interested in the red hair and green eyes, the lips that had scowled at him for six years but were now cresting in a soft smile.

Regulus already knew James had been interested in Lily for a great deal of time, interest that had turned to a crush in fifth year. He’d heard Peter, Remus, and Sirius tease James about his admiration before, had heard Snape brooding and hissing about how Lily deserved better, James was an overconfident pig, Lily would never be interested him in a million years. Yet there she was, seventeen and looking at James the same way he’d looked at her for years.

Regulus’ relationship with James was still young, admittedly, but in the few months they’d been together, he’d gotten attached, he’d started to trust, and now he felt like he was being left behind, simply because he’d seen James smiling at a girl Regulus knew he liked. James wouldn’t do that though, right? He wouldn’t break it off with Regulus just because he thinks he finally has a chance with Lily Evans. Or maybe he would. This whole time, the tender fingers on his cheeks and the lips on his forehead, had they just been ways for James to distract himself from Lily? Was he just using Regulus? Or was he just overreacting?

That’s when he reached out to the book on the table, flipping it open and reading a few lines until he realized it was a self help book. He turned the pages lazily, trying to distract himself, ignoring the few tears that had managed to squeeze out of his eyes. His body went rigid when he got to a particular chapter at the end of the book, titled appropriately with “Signs of Abandonment Issues”. Regulus read on autopilot, his heart in his throat.

“You’re Afraid to Turn Down Requests: There’s a huge difference between being kind and being afraid of further abandonment. There’s something wrong if you can’t say no. If you think that letting them down will make them leave you in an instant, you likely have abandonment issues. You Easily Get Jealous: If you have abandonment issues, there’s always something to be jealous about. You don’t like it when your otherwise loyal partner hangs out with their friends. When jealousy becomes a serious issue, you’ll always be insecure about your partner’s loyalty.

“You’re Afraid to Open Up: After months of being quiet and alone in class, you find someone genuinely interested in you. The two of you become the best of friends, only for this person to leave you for a new set of pals. You’ll begin thinking that you’re never enough, that you’re easily replaceable. You put up walls around you because it’s not worth the risk of being hurt again. Abandonment has made you a cold, unapproachable person. Making yourself hard to approach prevents otherwise good people from entering your life. If you’re actively deterring others from knowing you better, how can you find the people that are actually worth the risk? Being left out makes you think it’s better to be left out all the time. You Want to Have the Perfect Partner: Nobody’s perfect, you’re always going to find an issue because you’ve set unrealistic expectations for them. You’ll never find that perfect someone because they don’t exist. You’re going to turn down people who are imperfect but are otherwise honest, reliable, and kind.

“You Have Low Self-Esteem: Abandonment issues arise when someone important in your life disappoints you big time. Even if it’s not your fault, you might blame yourself for the outcome. You’ve Become Passive: People don’t normally see a single mistake as a major setback, but experiencing heartache over and over again can change how a person views their life. You’re always accepting the things that happen in your life, there’s nothing under control, so for people with abandonment issues, it’s normal to fail every day. Being passive also often means becoming a pessimist, a spectator in your own life, you don’t see the good in it. You’ve become so intent on seeing the bad side of things that the positive outcomes go unnoticed. If you do realize that something good is happening, your mind tells you that it’s not going to last. Any success is a mere oddity. Being abandoned does this to you: It tears down your belief in the goodness of others. Constant disappointment ruins your sense of hope and love. You no longer view life as having two sides of a coin: One good, one bad. For you, it’s just going to get worse from here on out.

Abandonment issues come from being wounded by an important person in your life unexpectedly leaving you. If you are someone who pays little attention to your own feelings in general, you are likely to minimize the emotional impact of painful events, such as your original abandonment.”

Regulus read over the section again and again, somehow his mind returning to Sirius at the end of it all, how betrayed he’d felt when his parents looked at him sullenly and scowled that Sirius had been sorted into Gryffindor, how lonely he felt in his own home when Sirius had returned for the summer in aggressive reds and golds, grinning like he’d found new fire in his life, barely sparing Regulus a glance as he locked himself in his bedroom and turned it inside out, pinning up posters throughout the years, writing his friends and proudly displaying his house. Then the summer he was disowned.

Regulus remembered how clammy his hands had been as he clung to the banister and slowly descended the stairs to watch where his mother and brother were screaming in the hall. There was an angry bruise on Sirius’ jaw, his lip busted open and bleeding, his gray eyes alight in madness and a bag of bare belongings on his shoulder. He stopped yelling, letting his mother scream profanities at him and casting his eyes up the stairs to Regulus, narrowing in resentment as his lips curled into a scowl.

Don’t leave me here alone, Regulus remembered the thought that never made it to his mouth, wondering idly what Sirius would have done in that moment if Regulus had spoken, begged him not to go. Instead he stood, passive, and watched Sirius leave, slamming the door and knocking picture frames from the walls in his violent exit. His mother screamed, Regulus hugged the banister, sliding down to sit on the stairs and staring at the door as if he actually thought Sirius would come back for him.

He didn’t.

Was that why Regulus couldn’t stop shaking at the prospect of James leaving him for Lily? After months of memorizing each other, after James finally made Regulus laugh, snickering into his hands as they hid in the broom closet just outside the Transfiguration classroom, would James really do that? Why?

Maybe because Regulus just wasn’t good enough. In the months they’d been together, it had taken Regulus a long time to so much as hold James’ hand, even longer to graduate from hesitant kisses to full on snogging sessions with hands holding tight to clothes and hair, but they’d yet to go further. Is that what James wanted? He wanted to sleep with Regulus? Regulus was acting like a prude, giving James so little, and that’s why he was looking at Evans again; because he wasn’t getting what he wanted from Regulus.

Don’t leave me here alone.

He went in search of James, stupid Muggle book clutched between his hands, and shouldn’t have been surprised when the person he literally ran into first was Remus Lupin, Sirius at his side. Regulus bumped hard enough into Remus to stagger back in shock, though Remus didn’t move an inch, looking somewhat taken aback at Regulus’ sudden appearance. Sirius bristled from beside his friend, holding a hand in front of Remus like he was trying to protect him from Regulus, who looked behind them expecting to see James but realizing with crushing disappointment they were alone.

“Can you maybe watch where you’re running?” Sirius asked harshly, and Regulus turned his eyes to him. “I should expect better from a goody two shoes Slytherin Prefect.” His statement held bite, but Regulus noticed the way his face softened into confusion. “Why are your eyes red?”

“Hey that’s my book.” Remus pointed deftly at the book in Regulus’ hand, and Regulus snapped his eyes to him. “My mum sent it, said I might like it. Left it in the library.”

Regulus felt something odd in his throat as he immediately stepped forward to shove the book against Remus’ chest, then hurried around him, leaving he and Sirius to watch after him as he jogged down the hall back towards where he’d last seen James in the courtyard with Lily.

Part of him didn’t want to see him again, see him standing leaning towards that Evans girl with that smile, he felt like he might vomit if he saw it again, but he needed to talk to James, before he had a complete breakdown. He just needed to know.

He was both relieved and upset to find the courtyard was empty, because James wasn’t with Lily, but he wasn’t there either. What if he’d snuck off with Lily somewhere? What if he was in the broom closet just inside the door? Regulus backed up into the castle, his pulse in his throat making it hard to breathe as he turned to face the broom closet, reaching a hand towards the door knob but freezing. If they were in there they could be snogging, or worse. What was Regulus supposed to do when he saw that? Saw his boyfriend shagging a woman? He didn’t know what to do, until a voice spoke into his ear.

“Alright there, Reg?”

Regulus flailed in shock, letting out a yelp as he tripped over his own feet, and probably would have hit the ground hard if James hadn’t reached out to grab him, lunging towards Regulus to hook an arm around his back so it looked like he was dipping the Slytherin mid dance. James looked startled for a moment at Regulus’ clumsiness before a cocky grin took to his lips.

“Well now, Little King, I knew you were falling for me, but I didn’t realize it was so literal.”

Regulus felt his face burn, scrambling to straighten up and stand on his own, stepping away from James until his back was against the closet door and staring at James with wide eyes like he’d done something wrong. James’ smile faded as he seemed to quickly pick up on Regulus’ mood, taking a step closer and lifting a hand but pausing when Regulus flinched.

“What’s going on? Why are you making that face?” James furrowed his brow, and something that could have been mistaken as protectiveness filtered into his eyes. “Did something happen?”

“Am I not enough for you?” Regulus blurted, and James stared with a blank face, looking truly confused.

“Huh?”

“I saw you earlier with Evans,” Regulus quickly explained, and James’ eyes grew wide, brows shooting up in realization, but there was no guilt or shame from being caught. “Am I not enough?! This is because we haven’t done anything, right?!”

James shot forward to cover Regulus’ mouth with a hand, pulling him away from the closet door as it was opened abruptly and a Ravenclaw girl stuck her head out, looking annoyed.

“Do you two mind? I’m trying to kiss the daylights out of someone in here!”

“Very sorry about him,” James apologized quickly, keeping a hand over Regulus’ mouth, one arm wrapped around his shoulders to keep him close. “Drank a potion a while ago, told him not to test it on himself, fool wouldn’t listen, now he’s spouting nonsense. I’m gonna take him to get some air, you two have fun in there.” James turned, slowly pulling his hand away and leading Regulus back to the door leading out into the courtyard. “Let’s go, Reg, get you some fresh air. You’ll be back to normal in no time.”

Regulus was speechless for several reasons, mainly humiliation that he’d blurted that out, and the fact someone had actually heard him, someone had actually been snogging in that closet and heard him and probably were very suspicious of what Regulus was yelling at James for. Fuck, she was a Ravenclaw, she probably already realised.

James lead him away from the courtyard and down towards Black Lake. No one else was around, and James seemed to eye the area for a moment before dubbing it safe, then released Regulus and turned to him.

“Now what’s gotten into you? What nonsense are you babbling about?”

“I saw you with Evans,” Regulus said dumbly, feeling like a major idiot as James arched an eyebrow.

“Yeah? She’s in my house and she’s Head Girl, sometimes I have to talk to her,” he paused before shaking his head. “You didn’t think I was flirting with her or something, did you?”

Regulus felt like passing out as his hands curled into fists. “Were you?”

James just snorted, taking a confident step forward and leaning to get into Regulus’ face. “No,” he said firmly, and Regulus felt his eyes burn. “Merlin, Regulus, what stupid thoughts go through that head of yours? You really think I’d cheat on you?”

Regulus took a shaky breath. “I-I saw you and thought, maybe, because I’m so difficult, because we don’t… do things.”

“You think I care about that?” James gaped. “I’m perfectly happy with the simple romantic dynamic we have, even if it’s a secret.” He reached out to cup his hands around Regulus’ face, thumbing at his cheeks where the tears from earlier had dried. “You’ve really been crying over this, huh? You’re a real idiot, Regulus Black.”

Regulus frowned in mild irritation, glaring at James. “You’re the idiot, James.”

“What for?”

“A smart person wouldn’t agree to go out with someone like me.”

James just grinned, looking entirely too amused. “Huh, guess you do have a point. We’re both idiots then. Only an idiot would still be dating me, with all my flaws in tact.”

Regulus just frowned at that, vaguely recalling what he’d read in the self help book and lifting a hand to touch the back of James’ arm gently. “I don’t mind that,” he said, and it must have been out of character for him, certainly not what James was expecting, because suddenly James looked shocked as Regulus slid his fingers up to cup the back of James’ hand on his face. “I don’t need you to be perfect or flawless, you know.” He shut his eyes, wondering what kind of mess he looked like with the dry tears on his pathetic face. “Just… don’t leave me alone.”

Instead of answering with words, James pulled Regulus closer, ducking his head so he could kiss Regulus, willing all of his feelings and promise and forever to seep from his lips and into Regulus’ body. It was the first time they’d kissed out in the open like this, in the middle of the day, where anyone could see them, but somehow Regulus couldn’t find it in him to care. So long as he knew James was still his, he didn’t care about anything else.

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#jegulus #amelia writes mini fics #mini fics #james potter #regulus black #regulus arcturus black #seekerchaser #send me prompts #let the jury know i fucking love jily #i also love jegulily #i love lily evans potter in general #but I did indeed use her as an angst decive #yeet i guess

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