#I haven’t even been able to get myself to look at instagram in a while ughhhh I hate it there but I have an audience I don’t wanna let down

[xxblairexxss]

Jealousy (part 4)

Pairing : Charles Leclerc x reader

Theme : Angst / fluff

The end! Thank you for loving the short series. I think this might be my best one yet because I didn’t limit myself to include everything but it was longer than my usual ones. Apologies it long fics are not your thing!

Your week went by with no more phone calls. Charles didn’t ask for another chance to speak to you and you were so glad he didn’t because you weren’t sure if you were gonna find it appealing or irritating. Deep down, you knew there was still an enraged flame in your heart that you couldn’t ignore regardless of your feelings for him.

You stopped replying to his texts too but you still read it from the notifications bar. He would tell you about what he did on the day, would ask you if you had eaten, how was your day but none of his questions were answered. He went to Maranello right away and stayed there until the next race so you were glad you didn’t have to meet him.

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Charles was demented with worry. He knew he was hoping too much when you unblocked his number but he never thought you would stop replying to his texts. He didn’t know what you were up to and that made him agitated.

Y/F/N has added to their story

You hadn’t unblock him on his Instagram but he would still be able to see your friend’s. He saw pictures of you on your friend’s Instagram story, all smiles and grinning ear to ear. He missed you a lot. He would stare at his phone every night before he went to sleep, anticipating your name popping up in his notification or phone call but none of it actually came. He was disappointed, of course, but he knew he deserved this.

But he still hadn’t lose you, had he?

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You had declined Charles’s offer to join him on his private flight to Mexico because you still had things to do at work on Friday so you had to miss practice rounds. You even forced Y/F/N to come with you so you wouldn’t be left alone with Charles because you didn’t know how to act and what to say around him. As if he wasn’t your boyfriend for 2 years.

“Please come with me! Please please please!”

Y/F/N rolled her eyes and shook her head, turning her back on you to which earned her a pillow threw at her head. “No, thank you. Hey!” She then sat up and threw it back at you and chortled at the face you made.

“I need you there! I can’t be with him alone!”

“He was your boyfriend for 2 years. Why are you acting as if you haven’t done anything nasty with him.” You stopped peeking inside your closet and glared at her.

“That was so unrelated.”

“You get what I mean! If you don’t want to be left alone then just ignore him! Plus, he’s gonna be so busy he won’t have time to chase after you.” Y/F/N shook her head at the navy top you showed her and you placed it back into the rows of clothes.

“I know but he even asked me to go to the after party. You know what happened the last time I went to a social event.” You picked another top and earned a yes from Y/F/N so you folded it into your small luggage.

“There’s a party?” You heard her sounded intrigued. You should have known this better. She would never say no to parties. The conversations could have been a plain sailing one if only you mentioned this topic first.

“Yeah. There’ll be hot guys everywhere. It’s a shame you couldn’t come.” You packed another pair of pants and saw in the corner of your eyes Y/F/N scrammed away, leaving the room.

“Wait for me!”

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You arrived at the hotel early in the morning and Charles had arranged everything. Y/F/N was passed out as soon as you guys checked in while you immediately gotten ready to go to the paddock before the qualifying round started.

Once you arrived, there were still a lot of people waiting at the entrance meanwhile the paddock was already packed with a few interviews being done at every spots. You only took a few steps when you heard your phone rang.

“Hi.”

You looked up from your phone and saw your boyfriend, or ex boyfriend, whichever you preferred walking towards you and you hated yourself for feeling this way. You felt like a kid who bumped into their crush at a school hallway. That silly, giddy with excitement as if it was your first time meeting him. Your heart was throbbing so loud that if he told you he could hear your heartbeat, you would have believed him right away. The butterflies in your stomach went wild and it made your knees weak. You smiled back at him and he took your hand in his, clasping it as he turned and walked back to the entrance. The sound of the fans around the paddock area screaming his name turned into a mumble as you kept your eyes on his back.

You were so glad you didn’t get to see and talk to him that much throughout the rest of the qualifying round. You didn’t even stay until the end though he offered you a ride back to the hotel.

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“How was it?”

“It was okay?”

Y/F/N mocked your face and you squinted your eyes at her. “What?”

“Tell me more! Did he say anything? Did he hug you? Tried to kiss you maybe?”

“No! He just held my hand. It’s not like he had any free time to even talk about us.” You took off your earrings and tied your hair in a bun.

“Such an asshole, isn’t he? When is he gonna apologise? Is he even gonna say sorry? Does he know how to say sorry?” You heard her blabbered with a mouth full of chips.

“We are not talking about this anymore. I’m gonna take a bath.”

As you started shampooing your roots, you heard the doorbell ring and thought it was just another room service that your best friend might had ordered.

“Hi, can I talk to Y/N?”

“She’s busy. We’re busy.” Y/F/N looked at the guy up and down and was going to close the door on him when he propelled it back.

“Wait! Please, I just want to give her something.”

Y/F/N stretched her arm forward and Charles blinked in confusion. “Give it to me. I’ll pass it to her.”

“Can I see her instead?”

“No. Either you pass it to me to you can go back to your room.” She replied sternly to which made him obediently handed the paper bags to her and walked away.

“Look,” Charles stopped in his trail when he heard her broke the silence.

“I’m not mad at you. Wait, I am mad at you. I’m pissed off, actually. But as much as I want her to leave your ass, she still loves you and I think that’s more than enough confirmation you need. I’ll give you a space to talk to her tomorrow so do whatever you need to do.” Charles was going to say something but the door slammed on his face faster than he could even blink.

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“Who was that? Did you order room service?” You walked out the bathroom in robes with wet hair, gasping when you saw boxes of pizza and doughnuts on the coffee table. “This is a lot! When did you buy them? Oh, this is my favourite!”

“I didn’t. The delivery guy came all the way to our room to deliver these.” You saw the displeased face on her and frowned in confusion.

“He also left you that. I don’t know what you told him but you could open a Dior pop-up shop with those stuffs.”

You looked to the side and saw a Dior paper bag full of different shades of the new lip gloss. It was the one you briefly mentioned in your last phone call with him. There was also a small note written on it. “I might forgot or had missed you said your favourite shade during our last call so I got them all. And I don’t think you have eaten anything after the qualifying round today so enjoy the food.”

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The race ended with Charles getting P3, letting him to get the podium spot again after missing it a few races. Y/F/N has asked you to head back early because she needed hours to make sure she looked hot to flirt all the guys at the afterparty. It always made you wonder how both of you ended up being best friends even with all those contrasts in your personalities.

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You arrived with Y/F/N a few minutes late so it was already crowded with people. As much as it made you feel nervous, Y/F/N was thrilled.

“You look beautiful, angel.”

“Oh?” You turned around and was greeted with Charles, hands in his pocket, a few steps away from you. You opened your mouth to reply to the compliment, but Y/F/N cut you off.

“Right? Too beautiful to be treated like a shit.”

You nudged her on her waist and glowered. “Okay, this is not the time!”

“I’m off! Charles, she’s yours.” Y/F/N fixed your hair before leaving both of you, too fast that you couldn’t even catch her arm to force her to stay with you.

“Thank you..” You awkwardly smiled, your hands were clasp together, trying not to look at his green eyes that much.

“Thank you?”

“For yesterday. You really didn’t have to, but , thank you.”

“Oh, it’s nothing compared to what you actually deserved. Anyway, do you want to—“ Charles turned around and saw one of his friends calling out to him. You looked at the source of the voice and saw his group of friends standing at the end of the room.

“You should go with them.”

“No, come with me.” He was going to seize your hand when you stepped back in defence.

“It’s fine, I’ll be somewhere else.”

“Y/F/N will kill me if she finds you alone. I know you hate me and you don’t want to be left alone with me but stay with me this time. Please?”

You felt his hand gently taking yours in his as he looked into your eyes, as if he was asking for consent and you gave in. Sure, you despised him a lot but the moment he held your hand, feeling his thumb stroking your knuckles, it reminded you that he had always been your solace in life. It took everything in you to not embrace him right there and then.

He introduced you to the rest of the groups and immediately engaged in a full conversations. His hand never left yours. You were just standing by his side, playing around with your heels when you were greeted with Y/F/N and a few people with her. She would always brought her group of friends with you at any party just to introduce you, her best friends with her new friends. Charles turned around when he felt you accidentally tugged on his hand.

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine.” You were so glad for Y/F/N and was simply amazed with her social skills. Though you had a hard time engaging in a conversation and preferred to just listened, she kept on pulling you into the conversation by constantly asking you series of questions.

“That’s the worse. Right, Y/N?”

“Isn’t Y/N so pretty? I did her hair.”

“Y/N is very good at mix and match her clothes. Right, Y/N? But she still needed my help.”

Throughout the conversations, Charles still kept your hand in his but then it got uncomfortable when your hand started sweating so you ended up holding his pinky finger, occasionally fiddled with his fingers since you didn’t have your ring on. You thought he would pull away but he didn’t. He didn’t even budge.

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“Do you wanna go back to the hotel?”

“Can we?”

“Of course, angel. Let’s go.”

Charles had took you back to the hotel but it was only when you had arrived in front of your room when you realised you didn’t have your access card with you. He had asked you to stay in his room first until Y/F/N called.

It had been a while since the last time you were with him in a small space. As soon as you walked in, you were greeted with his smell, the mixture of scent between the different collection of his perfumes, the smell of his shower gels it was all too overwhelming it made your eyes teared up instantly.

“Sit down, silly. Why are you standing?”

You let out a sob, looking down and he stoop down to look at your face, sounding all worried and anxious. “Hey, hey, what’s wrong? Y/N?”

You continued to sob uncontrollably and he enfolded you in his arms, one hand around the back of your head and another one wrapped on your waist. “It’s okay, angel. I got you.”

“I hate you.”

His arms around your figure tighten when your body shook and he planted a kiss on the side of your head. “It’s okay, I hate myself too.”

“But I miss you so much, I miss your touch, your kiss, your voice, everything about you. I tried so hard to ignore you because maybe it would be easier for me to end everything, to end us but it was so hard.” The silent tears kept on running down your cheeks that you were so sure his shirt was already soaked.

Charles’s blood ran cold when you mentioned about ending things. Both of you had always been so optimistic with the relationship. You would always talked about how you would grow old together and he would have to assure you that he would always find you beautiful or you would have sulk.

He pulled away and crouched down to hold your cheeks in his hands and level his eyes with yours. “No, please, no. Please don’t leave me. Please, angel. I know I fucked up but give me another chance to be better. To fix this. I know it makes me selfish but I can’t see you with anyone else. Please.”

You didn’t reply but kept on wiping your eyes with the back of your hand, harshly, because of how frustrating everything was.

“I’ll kneel down if you want. I’ll do whatever you want me to do. I can’t lose you. I really, really can’t.” His eyes were red from holding his tears and it smashed your heart. He looked so broken with compunction it made you cry even more.

“I’m sorry for what I did. I should have listened to you. I just got so mad when I saw you with other guys when I should have known better. I was too blinded with jealousy.” He took a shaky breath and wrapped you back in his arms so you wouldn’t see him cry.

“And when I saw what happened to you that night, I was just so furious at myself for being so stupid and allowing that to happen to you so I just blew up at you when all you needed was just my commiseration and assurance.” He left a few lingering kisses to the crown of your head and mumbled against your hair. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, angel.”

“Do you miss me?”

You felt his chest quivered as he tittered to your silly question. Had you got a glimpse of his life during the absence of you, you would have seen how miserable he actually was. “I don’t think the words I miss you is enough to express how much I long for you.”

You were no longer hugging his middle but your body was flushed against him as you stroke his cheek, feeling it damp from the tears that he tried to hide from you.

His arms left your waist briefly as he unhooked the necklace around his neck, pulling the end of it so the ring would slip out into his palm. “Do you… accept my apology?”

“I’ll think about it.” You giggled when he looked taken aback. “You are forgiven, Charles.”

“Can I put this back on you?” He looked nervous, as if he was going through every words he was about to say, too scared if you would slip off his fingers again.

“Are you proposing to me?”

“Not yet but I will. Mark my words.” He slid the ring back into your ring finger and lifted your hand to peck on it. Your arms circled around his neck as he locked you in his embrace. Your face was just an inch away from him that your nose would collide into his every time you moved your head a little. “I love you, Y/N.”

“And I love you more, Charles.” He dipped his head down and pressed his lips to yours, his arms cinching you to him as you kissed him back, your hands feeling the silken strands of his hair against your fingers.

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“Hello?” Charles squinted his eyes and put the phone to his ear, slightly whispering to not wake up the sleeping beauty in his arms.

“Charles? Do you happened to know where Y/N is? I just realised she’s not in the room.”

He laid his head back on the pillow and yawned. “Go to sleep, Y/F/N.”

“Where’s Y/N, you dick!”

“My girlfriend’s here with me. All safe and sound. You don’t have to worry.” His hand ran up and down against your back,when he felt you stirred on his chest.

“Oh, okay. I thought she was kidnapped or something. Break her heart again and I’ll make sure you won’t get any podium in your entire career. I mean it.”

You tilted your head a little to look at him, your eyes barely open. “Who was it?”

“It was just your guardian angel making sure I don’t fuck things up again. Let’s go back to sleep, baby.”

✧.* tags! @i83andrew @cltrlne @karmabyfernando @ohthemisssery @buendiabebeta @needtokeepfeelingsincheck @ironmaiden1313 @teenagedreams-cl @sheslikeacurse @love4lando @charli123456789 @ru-kru @httpspedri26 @honey6578 @sealsu @shyartisanvoidwagon @changetyre @aundercover

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[strniohoeee]

I need and angry love confession from Matt to Reader !! super angst but ends in fluff

I can’t

Pairing: Matt Sturniolo X Female Reader

Synopsis: You moved on and now you’re soon to be engaged, but Matt knows this isn’t right. Desperate to get you to change your mind he races over to you. But will he get there in time?

Warning⚠️: NONE, I lovedddd writing this ughhh😩😩got me all in my feels and shit😔

Song for the imagine: Chasing Cars- Snow Patrol

I don’t quite know

How to say

How I feel

Those three words

Are said too much

They’re not enough

I’m not sure how to explain it and I’m not sure that I’d ever be able to. I never planned to see myself with anyone else other than Matt, but here I was sitting in my makeup room with a dazzling diamond promise ring sitting on my ring finger.

It felt right? I mean I wasn’t sure how to feel actually. A million questions ran through my head and they all tied to Matt for some reason.

I left Matt a little over a year ago after being with him for two years. I felt like I treated him wrong, I felt like I held him back from what he wanted…..

Flashback

“What are you saying?” Matt asked me as he stood up from the couch

“ I’m breaking up with you Matt” I replied looking at him

His face dropped and he swallowed thickly

“You’re what?” He replied blinking fastly

“I’m holding you back Matt and I haven’t been the best girlfriend. I can not live with myself knowing that there’s someone out there better for you” I replied swallowing back a sob

“I don’t want no one else, I want you. Why can’t you see that? You always tear down the perfect things around you.” He said rubbing his face with his hand

“I’m not happy because I’m not making you happy” I replied

“You don’t get to tell me how I feel. I love you and I love us and sure we have our problems, but I can’t imagine a life without you” he said slapping his hand down on his leg

“That’s the issue, all these problems are because of me. Matt you have to let me go” I said shaking my head

“I can’t! I can’t let you go” he replied rushing up to me and grabbing my hands

“This hurts me too, but I don’t think we’re for each other anymore” I said letting a few tears slip

“No….please don’t do this to me” he said in a whisper

“I love you, but I can’t keep holding you down. I’m sorry” I told him

“You’re not! Please just stay and relax and we can talk this out” he said looking into my eyes and gripping my hands firmer

“Matthew….no this is over” I replied sliding my hands from his and walking back

“Please don’t leave me” he pleaded with tears in his eyes

“I have to” I replied and with that I walked out

Flashback Over

For a while my thoughts were clouded with many doubts. Wondering if I made the wrong decision. But as soon as we broke up Matt and his brother's careers took off even more. Further proving it was me who needed to go.

But sitting here right now with this ring on my finger my brain told me that Matt and I were completely over. Nothing more than mere memory, a glimpse into a great time in my life, but it was over.

I loved my boyfriend more than words could explain and this ring finalized that it was him who I would spend the rest of my life with.

Him and I had posted our pre engagement on Instagram explaining that this was a small step in me eventually becoming his wife. It was a bittersweet moment because this was a new chapter in my life and I had to look forward. However for some reason I was constantly looking back….

Matt's POV

I laid in my bed journaling when my phone started to ring. I looked down and saw it Chris calling me

“Yo?” I said as I placed the phone to my ear

“Did you see it?” He asked me

“See what? Chris what the fuck are you talking about?” I asked furrowing my brows and shutting my book

“Y/N…” he said and paused

“Is she okay?” I asked suddenly sitting up

“Yeah she’s fine, but she’s pretty much engaged” Chris said in a whisper

“What?” I replied

My heart dropped to my stomach as my throat ran dry.

“Yeah they posted it on Instagram. I’m sorry bro” he said clearing his throat

I didn’t even reply, I just hung up on him. Opening instagram I searched up her page and I let out a small gasp and the picture…..reading the caption made my skin crawl

I grabbed my keys and rushed out the house. Running out to my car in the rain. My mind raced as I hit the gas. Doing 80 in the rain as my breathing became erratic and my fist tightened on the grip

Y/N pov

I walked out of my makeup room and walked out to my living room. Peering outside I saw that it was raining. My heart burst with excitement.

I decided to sit in my glass lanai and watch the rain hit the roof. Smiling at how happy I was becoming and how content I felt in life right now.

I stood by one of the windows writing my name in the fog that crackled along the glass. Suddenly I heard the door open and a creak of someone’s foot stepping down

“Hey babe” I replied before turning around

My heart dropped when a soaking wet, crying and shivering Matt stood in front of me.

“Matt?” I said blinking quickly

“Don’t do this” he said shaking

“Matt you’re wet and cold” I said walking up to him

“DON’T” he said sternly causing me to look up at him and stepping back

“How did you even get in here” I said sternly

“Your hiding spot for the key hasn’t changed” he said bluntly

“Why are you here?” I said scoffing

“So that’s it? You’re just going to marry him” he replied

“You’re talking crazy Matt what’s going on” I said getting concerned

“I waited…. I waited for you praying you’d come back. Having to go through days of being so unhappy and angry, and for what? For you to spend all this time and energy on someone new and get married? What was I? What was I huh?” He said choking out a sob as his voice cracked

“I loved you and I had the best time with you, but it wasn’t going to work and with Y/BF/N it worked” I said swallowing thickly

“You gave up! You gave up on us… that could’ve been us but you chose to run” he said breathing heavily

“I didn’t give up, I did it for you! Can’t you see that?” I said pleading

“I can’t” he said

“Let’s go inside you’re shivering” I replied pointing to the door

“NO” he replied choking out another sob

“Matt, what do you want me to do?” I said getting teary eyed

“I want you to be honest with yourself” he replied

“I don’t understand what you’re getting at” I replied throwing my hands up

“Goddamnit Y/N! I love you! I have loved you. I let you into my life in a way I never did with anyone else. I loved you to the point of distraction, and you dropped me like I was nothing. I can not pretend that didn’t happen” he said loudly

“You love me?” I replied shocked by this

“Hasn’t it always been obvious? I begged you not to leave me and you did. And now you’re basically engaged to this guy, so like I said be honest with yourself” he said pointing at me

“Honest about what?” I replied raising my voice

“Your feelings” he said bluntly

“My feelings? The fact that I’m in love with my new boyfriend and we’re going to get married eventually?” I replied talking with my hands

“That’s bullshit” he said bluntly

“No it’s not matt” I replied back

“Yes it is” he said pushing back

“No it isn’t” I said sternly

“Just admit” he said pushing even harder now

“ADMIT WHAT?” I yelled at him throwing my hands up

“You know what…it’s creeping in the back of your mind consuming all your thoughts” he said breathing through his nose heavily

“I can’t” I said shaking my head

“You can’t or you won’t” he replied

“Jesus Matt! What do you want me to admit? Admit that I’m madly in love with you? Admit that the thought of marrying my boyfriend scares me. Scares me because it’s supposed to be you. Is that what you want to hear” I said yelling

“Was it that hard” he replied

“What have you done” I said looking at him wide eyed

“This wasn’t me….this was you” he replied

I stomped over to him pushing him back repeatedly

“Who do you think you are? Huh? You think you can just come back into my life and push all these things on me. How could you Matt” I said smacking at his chest in anger

“Stop it! STOP IT” he said grabbing my arms firmly

“LET ME GO” I yelled pulling against him but he was much stronger than me

Pulling against him as we were both breathing heavily. I stopped and stared at him letting air come out my nose as my chest rose and fell rapidly.

“Why?” I whispered tears brimming in my eyes

“WHY HUH? WHY?” I yelled against him pulling at my arms

Yet he didn’t say anything. Instead he let me freak out, watching me intently as his eyes were glazed over with tears threatening to spill out.

“Stop fighting it” he said in a whisper

“This wasn’t how it was supposed to go! I was supposed to forget about you. I was supposed to move on. You were supposed to move on” I said slowing my breathing down

“I never wanted to move on, and I never will” he replied back

“I have always loved you from the moment I bumped into you on that street to the day you walked out of my life. I prayed day in and day out you’d come back and you didn’t” he said letting go of my arms

“Matt I can’t do this, not to you, not to me and especially not to Y/BF/N” I replied wiping my eyes

“So then don’t marry him” he said pleading with me

“Matt I can’t do that” I replied shaking my head

“He’s not meant for you and I’d like to believe….I’d have to believe that if you knew that…. I mean really really knew that deep in your heart. You wouldn’t be getting ready to marry someone unless that someone….unless that someone was me” he said swallowing thickly and letting a few tears fall

I stared at him shocked before opening my mouth to speak

“Matt I’m not going to lie to you, yeah I have felt things since breaking up with you that I didn’t know or think I knew I could feel, but I have realized you can’t just turn back the hands of time” I replied running my hands through my hair

“Why not?” He said in a whisper

“Because I moved on….you were supposed to move on. We’ve gone down different paths. We made choices and I….I chose Y/BF/N” I said wiping my eyes

Matt licked his lips and jutted his pointed tongue to the inside of his mouth. Letting a choked sob fall from his mouth.

“Can’t you see? Even after letting you go and trying to do what’s best for you, I still am somehow hurting you. Please don’t cry” I said pacing a bit

“I’ll be fine… I promise” he said rolling his eyes letting the tears go back

“I love you Matt” I said walking up to him and grabbing his shoulders

“No you don’t, if you did you’d be with me” he said scoffing and shrugging my hands off

“It doesn’t work that way” I said shaking my head

“Doesn’t work that way? I just professed my love to you as you did the same, but still you’re going to marry someone else?” He replied getting upset again

“That’s not fair” I said blinking at him

“Whatever…I’ve wasted my time clearly” he said throwing his hands up

He began to walk back into my house. I trailed close behind him calling out his name.

“Matthew please” I said running a bit faster

I got in front of him, grabbing his upper arms and stopping him. Looking into his eyes searching for something. Searching for an answer to this complicated puzzle.

My breathing became rapid as I searched for the words to say. Matt got clearly impatient as his jaw was clenched and his glare was intense. My eyes darted from one eye to the other.

I let go of him blinking and swallowing thickly before opening my mouth.

“Matt I love you a lot, and that never went away. I never wanted to hurt you, but rather I wanted you to get stronger. I was holding you down and that you can not deny. I have realized that the way I went about it was wrong and I hurt you, but I also hurt myself. I truly wanted to heal myself and not look back, but everyday all I could think about was you. Yes Y/BF/N is amazing and a great guy but I just…..I just…..” my words began to scramble because I wasn’t sure how to say this next statement

“But you don’t love him” he said in a whisper

My eyes slowly lifted from the floor to meet his once again, nodding at his answer

“I don’t love him” I said swallowing thickly

“If I’m reading into this wrong then I’m sorry” he said and before I could react he suddenly lunged toward me

Smashing his lips into mine, his right hand finding its spot on my left cheek. His thumb gently rubbed the warm skin as our lips locked.

My mind was fuzzy with what was going on, but all I knew was that this felt so right. Like the stars aligning perfectly. What I was so unsure of with my current boyfriend I was 100% sure of with Matt.

When he pulled away we locked eyes, catching our breath as we smiled gently

“I’m so sorry for leaving you” I said in a whisper

“Just promise to never do it again” he said

“I promise” I said smiling at him

Matt grabbed the back of my head, pulling me into a hug before placing a kiss to my forehead.

Breaking things off with Y/BF/N wasn’t easy. I truly had some love for him, but not in the way I did for Matt. Matt was my soulmate and I was so dumb to turn a blind eye to it.

I made him understand that this wasn’t because of him, but because I wasn’t ever truly sure that we were meant for each other. And that the promise ring made it all a bit too real. In the sense that I could not see myself with him forever.

Matt and I took things slow, we reestablished a connection starting off as friends first was what we wanted. We didn’t want to see each other hurt ever again.

I can’t live with the idea of ever hurting him again… I just…

I can’t.

The End

I hope yall loved this one, it was giving very early 2000s love confession in the rain. I’m here for itttt, but we’re almost at 1,800 followers OH YEAHHH i love yall🥹🖤🖤

-J💅🏽

#sturniolo triplets #sturniolo x reader #sturniolo fanfic #sturniolo triplets imagines #matt sturniolo x reader #matt sturniolo fanfic #matt sturniolo imagines #matthew sturniolo imagines

[emmyrosee]

GUESS WHO’S BACK!!! WITH ANOTHER RANT!!! your resident haikyuu simp, that’s who. (a simp who is currently listening to her friend argue w her bf send help this is so awkward)

Today I offer: sunarin teasing a (slightly) jealous reader.

Okay so let’s just say that your relationship was more on the private side- no one outside of friends, his teammates and family knew he was dating anyone. But you’ve been together for so long?? Like years. And his fans for some reason seem to think he’s been dating some other public figure (up to your imagination) bc they’ve been at the same events a couple times now and somehow keep ending up in pics together. These two have like, never spoken aside from awkward small talk to be polite. Very un-relationship like. So anyway. You’re starting to not like the fact that every single time you open social media you’re flooded with fan pages shipping them, and Suna picks up on this and just??? Posts you one day??? Randomly??? And it’s both the sweetest and most annoying thing ever bc aww cute caption and stuff but “really, rin, did you NEED to add the picture of us from two years ago when my hair looked like that?” (He might have also posted a suggestive pic of you two or a video of you kissing or something at the end and you just haven’t scrolled that far yet so he basks in the peace and hides away before he can hear your shriek when you realize hehe)

Either way it’s sweet and things calm down after that, but he teases you RELENTLESSLY about the fact you were jealous and makes it known that you’re the only one for him ever. and that he would never even make you jealous on purpose or anything, he just likes the feeling of belonging to you as much as you belong to him <3

I’m just soft for rin, my next couple rants might be suna-centric :3

anon <3

WOULD LIGHT MYSELF ON FIRE FOR ONE (1) SUNA RINTARO, HE IS THE LOML AND I WILL ABSOLUTELY DEVPUR ALL THE RINTARO RANTS-

Ahem.

He’s a shit. I love him so much.

Because like, yeah, okay, paparazzi are the worst, and while he’s still able to live his life like a standard person, he knows what people do to celebrities who are in relationships, and he doesn’t want to put you through that. Your friends respected that, his teammates completely close lipped -atsumu actually has it in his interview agreements he’s never to talk about any relationships, and honestly, it’s been a life saver for so many of his teammates- but nothings perfect.

Sometimes, like an idiot, Rin leaves the house with hickeys on full display. Just. Out and about. The media loves that, and usually, Rintaro doesn’t even care, whatever makes them happy.

But then it happens.

He gets out of a limo at a sponsor event, with a ‘mysterious woman,’ dress shirt wrinkled and tux closed haphazardly.

And of course, a hickey just above the pristine white collar.

This. Blows. Up.

Because of course it does, and of course people now assume this woman is the one who leaves marks on your boyfriends body, and how cool he is for dating someone uNdErGrOuNd and whatever the bloody hell they try to spew.

And it hurts, okay, because this woman- Atsumu’s stylist, literally because the man child can’t go one damned day without spilling something on himself, and that’s actually why she was helping Rin, dumbass spilt champagne all over his-damn-self- is very obviously not his partner, you are, and it’s just. It sucks watching them get fan edits and theories on how long they’re been together when you know the truth.

It turns you pretty sour towards him, almost resentful, and he tries to remind you that it’s just a rumor and you’re the only soul he’d ever want to be with, but it gets hard to believe when you open your Instagram and it’s about how stunning “Rin’s girlfriend” is.

And you, obviously, are not that person. You’re you.

Instead of sitting together, you’re sitting on one end of the couch, far from him; he tries to snuggle, and you get up and leave the room. Instead of holding his hand in the car, his hand tries desperately to paw for yours or even your thigh, just to hold onto you, but you turn towards the window. Instead of going with him places when he goes to see his buddies, you croak out an extremely sad “how about you go with the pretty lady who gives you hickeys?”

He feels bad for you, obviously. But in his own mind, he’s at his breaking point. He needs your attention and affection, he thrives and breathes and lives because of it, and now he’s losing his mind that he hasn’t had it for weeks.

So, against telling you, and hoping to smother any other rumors about himself and Atsumu’s stylist, he makes his post.

None of them have your whole face, maybe an eye or a smile or wearing a mask (he put some thought into this okay-) but it’s very obviously not the stylist. He posts a picture of a shadow in which your hands are holding, the next one is a picture you took, where your hand was shaped in half a heart and on the other end, he held up the other half to match, and finally, a video; one where he’s laying on top of you with his eyes closed, your hand in his hair and scratching his scalp while he sleepily mumbles how much he loves you (the last video is actually one he took of you suckling and marking up his neck, his raspy breath on the other end; extremely not safe for the internet, and naturally, when you saw that, you shit your pants and chased him with a shoe, but that’s not the point.)

It’s something he clearly wanted to fix, but also wanted to keep you as safe as possible. And you certainly appreciate it, and when you see what he did and how the comments are now hyping you up, you shuffle your way to find him. He’s on the couch, carding his own hair, and smiling up at you as you approach him.

“Thank you,” you whisper, and he shifts one of the legs sprawled out on the couch to rest on the floor so you can lay between them, which you do. “I hated being so far from you but… but I couldn’t-“

“I get it,” he assures, nosing softly at you. “It wasn’t fair to you. I know how much you hated it.”

“She was very pretty, though,” you confess, and he lowers his eyes to peek at you through his lashes.

“You think so?” He asks, shrugging as you nod. “Wasn’t really my type.”

#I LOVW HIM SO MUCH I CANNOT STAND HIM #THIS ASK EASILY PUT NINE YEARS BACK ON MY LIFESPAN UGH #GOD GOOD ASK GOOD ASK BABY- #suna rintaro #suna rintaro fluff #suna rintaro x reader #suna rintaro x gn!reader #suna rintaro x reader fluff #suna rintaro imagine #suna rintaro haikyuu #suna #suna fluff #suna x reader #suna x reader fluff #suna x gn!reader #suna imagine #suna haikyuu #haikyuu #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu imagine #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x gn!reader #haikyuu x gender neutral reader #haikyuu x yn #haikyuu x y/n #haikyuu x you #god I wanna bite his cheeks #I hate him so much now come here so I can kiss you-

[velvetstreets]

Can I request that the reader is an actress and she jokingly said she had a crush on Jack in an interview then he slides in her dms bc he saw that she was filming in a location close to one of his shows in the UK and the reader is akdhdlslslsjsk and goes and she goes backstage and then after his show she invites him out to a late dinner or something and he eats more than dinner 🤭🤭🤭

miss Blanca it’s an honor to write for u again my bby 🙇🏽‍♀️🫶

also I forgot they were in the UK for a moment and have Jack driving in this, which we all know that man would probably die driving on the other side of the road - but for this, we pretend! :)

None of the people in my writings portray the actual people I write about! It’s all a work of fiction, I have no idea how they are/act irl.

Warnings: basically fluff!! w a side of smut :), just some good ol’ making out, and oral sex (f!receiving)

—————————————— 

“So who’ve you got your eye on then, hmm?” Amelia questioned you as you sat across from her a chicken shop in London.

“Wha- I don’t have an eye on any-“ you started to laugh, feeling the camera pan in on you.

“Don’t lie, you’ve got to! You’re the breakout star of the year with your new film, and have caught the eyes of everyone, let’s be real!” She said smiling.

“Harry Styles?”

“He’s a sweetheart, but no.”

“C’mon, Drake?”

“No!” You laughed loudly. “He’s my older brother. Nothing going on there.”

“How about Jack Harlow?” She pressed you in a loving fashion.

“Yeah, Jack Harlow.” You tried to keep your composure, playing it off as a joke even though you did think he was cute.

“I’ve got an in with him you know? He took me out on a date once, different chicken shop though. Nothing further though, my eyes are more focused on Idris Elba.” She jokes.

The interview finishes filming after while later after some more banter and questions; and Amelia approaches you after.

“You know I can set you two up if you want? I have his number.” She offered, whipping out her phone and giving you an encouraged look.

“No, no that’s really okay.” You motioned at her, heat slightly running to your cheeks. “I’d rather get at him myself; or him at me. Not anyone in between.” You told her.

“Oh he’ll absolutely slide into your DM’s after seeing that. He won’t be able to resist you.” She laughed, giving you a wink before going to talk to her producers.

Nah, he’ll ignore it. It’s whatever! You thought to yourself, trying to release the nerves of Jack possibly reaching out.

—

The episode aired a few weeks later, and as you were getting ready for bed, you got a certain notification.

jackharlow wants to message you.

“Oh shit.” You said, eyes widening and sitting up in your bed. Immediately you called your best friend.

“Hey boo-boo, what’s up?” She answered the FaceTime snacking on a cookie.

“Yeah, so fuckin’ Jack Harlow just DMed me?”

“Bitch!-” She lept up out of her seat, pushing her face closer to the camera/ “What did he say?!” She yelled excitedly.

“I don’t know! I haven’t opened it yet.” You stared at your DMs, fidgeting with your nails.

“Bitch I swear if you don’t open it right the fuck now-“ she urged you.

“Wait, lemme just wait a few minutes, I don’t want him to see me see his message yet-“ you compromised with her as she rolled her eyes, but let you be. You finally decided to open it and see what he said.

He had sent the instagram post from Chicken Shop Date with a message.

jackharlow: 🙇‍♂️ it’s an honor to be crushed on by thee Y/N. But I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t been crushin’ on you for awhileee now tho.

“Oh god.” You mumbled in shock.

“What? What did he say?” Your best friend pressed you excitedly. You repeated his message out as she let out a squeal.

“AHHH I told you he’s into you too!! I see you girl, shiiiit lemme start with them manifestations you’re always doin’, I’m tryna get me some dick too.” She smirked at you.

You chewed at your lip before deciding on how to respond.

y/ninstagram: Oh really? 🤔 Amelia should’ve mentioned that when she tried to give me your number.

jackharlow: did you take it? 👀

y/ninstagram: nah, I like when people ask me out themselves.

jackharlow: good thing I asked her for your number. Can I call you right now?

You swallowed, hard.

“He wants to call me right now.” You told your friend.

“SHUT UP! Oh my god, okay BYE! Go make babies with that fine ass white man- call me after, love you boo.” She squealed before hanging up.

You looked as his message, and grinned to yourself as you hearted his message.

Soon enough, your phone rang, and your heart was beating out of your throat at this point. You took a small breath and exhaled before answering his FaceTime.

He was laid against some pillows, probably in his hotel room, wearing a blue zip up sweatsuit. His curls framed his face perfectly, and his teeth basically sparkled as he smiled at you.

“Hi Y/N, I’m Jack.” He said.

You rolled your eyes and laughed a little.

“I know. Hi Jack, how are you?” You asked.

“I’m good, better now.” He confidently responded. “And you?” He asked.

“I’m good.. a little tired from work, but good nonetheless. This was also a nice surprise.” You flirted back at him.

He smiled widely, and softly laughed. “Well I’m not gonna hold you up too long, beautiful. I just noticed you’re in London, and was wondering if you would like to come see my show on Friday? We could hang out after and have dinner if you’d like?” He asked in a charming tone.

“Yeah okay, that’d be really nice.” You agreed, biting your lip to hold back your excitement.

“Great. I’ll see you soon then mamas, sleep well.” He said before you said your goodbyes and hung up.

“Oh god.. what’d I just get myself into?” You shook your head, smiling to yourself in disbelief.

—

It was now Friday, and Jack was almost done with his show. You had FaceTimed him all week before today, and as well as the two of you had hit it off; the sexual tension was almost unbearable. He had met you at the entrance and introduced you to everyone before the two of you hung out in the green room for a bit. The two of you bonded and flirted; playful comments and touches thrown here and there before it was time for Jack to perform. Something felt different about him; like the way he made you laugh, like genuinely laugh - not the fake laugh you used in interviews and when meeting upper business executives. Jack was caring and respectful, it was like you could see how soft his heart truly was, with every smile and witty comment with a glint in his eye - it was like you could see his heart glowing. He brought you backstage where you got to hang out with his friend Urban and a few others while Jack performed. You danced and sang along with everyone, and every once in a while, Jack would look over and smile brightly as he saw you having a good time. 

“I can see why he likes you.” Urban said as he stood next to you, cheering his best friend on from the sidelines. 

You turned to face him, a smile still on your face as you watched Jack perform from the corner of your eye. 

“Yeah? Hope it stays that way, ‘cause I kinda like him too.” You admitted to the blonde. 

“Oh no doubt. I haven’t heard him talk this much about a girl before; I can’t get him to shut up.” He laughed. “But I see why, now.” He turned to look at you, smiling. You blushed and lightly bit at your lips, looking over at Jack again. 

“Don’t gas me up too much now Urban, I may end up with an ego like your friend.” You joked, laughing with him as he put a friendly arm around you, continuing to sing and rap along with you as Jack put on an energetic show.

He finally finished with First Class, and the crowd was roaring. He thanked the crowd and made his way to the side of the stage where you stood.

“Sooo... what’d ya think? Not too bad I hope, I know I forgot some of the lyrics, but I think it was salvageable, no?” He said coming up to you; his dazzling smile and the dimples that accompanied it making you swoon.

“You were incredible, they loved you! Pretty sure they didn’t wanna let you go so soon.” You told him, eyes still wide at his work ethic and charisma he brought with him on stage. 

“Mmm, so kinda how I feel about you then?” He smoothly commented, blue eyes never leaving yours. 

“You still got me, we have dinner remember?” You countered, giving him a wink. 

“Of course, I could never forget. It’s all I’ve been thinking about this week.” He flashed another smile. “Let me just shower real quick, and then we can get going, yeah?” He said, and you nodded.

“I’ll be quick, I promise!” He yelled to you as he sprinted to his green room like his life depended on it, making you giggle. 

—

When he was ready, Jack told his team he wanted to take a car alone with you, and he guided you outside with him, holding your hand as the two of you talked about any and everything. He opened the door and helped you into the car before jogging over to the driver’s seat. 

“So I realized I never asked you what you wanted to eat- M’sorry about that, but there’s Italian, Chinese, or maybe you want something authentic since we’re in England-” Jack started to nervously babble as he pulled out of the parking lot before he felt you kiss his cheek. 

“No need to apologize Jack, I think it’s very cute that you wanna plan all of this out. But you must be tired no? D’ya wanna just go back to your hotel and order room service?” 

“I’m not that tired, plus I’m tryna treat this amazing girl with what she deserves; the very best.” He said. “Unless you wanna do that? I’m down for whatever you want, really.” He answered honestly. 

You gently kissed his hand that was intertwined with yours. 

“You’re too sweet. But I’ve always been a low-key, take out at home kinda girl. You can save the fancy dates for later on.” You smiled at him. 

“Room service it is then. Whatever my girl wants.” He grinned at you, changing course to his hotel. 

—

Jack basically ordered the entire menu, just so the two of you would have options, even though you told him it wasn’t necessary, he insisted. 

The two of you ate and talked, sharing laughs and playful touches as some Netflix show played in the background; neither of you paying attention to it anymore. You were now sitting next to him, his arm slung around the back of the couch, yearning to feel his touch, but you could tell he was ever the gentleman, not wanting to push any boundaries, but at this point, you were desperate to feel him. 

You turned you head and looked at him, and he did the same, meeting your eyes. You admired the golden, wispy, wiry tufts of facial hair that sculpted his face perfectly, his soft ringlet curls that made you want to lightly pull on them to see them spring back into place, his blue eyes - which were anything but cold, the slope of his nose, the freckled that adorned his cheeks; and finally, his pink lips that looked so soft and supple, you couldn’t hold back anymore.

You leant in and kissed him, with Jack kissing you back passionately. 

“Fuck, I’ve wanted to that all night, all week really.” He breathed out after you pulled away. 

“Me too, Harlow.” You giggled at him before he pulled you back in for another kiss.

What started out as innocent and mellow, the kiss diverged into a heated make-out session. You turned to straddle Jack as he helped you into his lap, his hands roaming your body, before he started to kiss your neck and down to your chest.

“Fuck, Jack-” you moaned out, his every touch electrifying you. 

“S’it feel good, sweetheart?” He asked, like he wasn’t about to combust with you on his lap. 

“So good.. really good,” you whimpered softly, starting to rut your hips into his, the friction from his jeans hitting against your clothed clit deliciously. 

You tugged at his curls, earning a low groan from him, as you pulled his head up from your neck, devouring him in another heated kiss. Jack moaned into your mouth, his tongue finding yours as you continued to rock against him.

“Bed, Jack- bed, please baby.” You whispered to the curly haired boy. 

“You sure? D-Don’t wanna make you feel like you gotta do anything-” He stuttered. 

“Such a gentleman, Jack Harlow.” You smiled at him before lowering your lips to his, pressing a soft kiss to him. 

“But, I want this, and by the strain I can feel through your pants, I’m pretty sure you want the same thing.” You whispered in his ear, making him shiver and groan. 

“You’re gonna be the death of me Y/N, I swear.” Jack said before picking you up in his arms, making you squeal and giggle as he brought the two of you to his bed. He gently tossed you onto the white sheets, and kissed you, slowly grinding against you as he held your head in his hands intimately. After a few more minutes of soft gasps and groans, and groping eachother, you couldn’t take it anymore.

“Please Jack, fuck me.” You told him. He stopped momentarily, and let out a sigh of defeat. You froze. Maybe he didn’t want this? Had you misconstrued his signals? Was he not into it anymore?

“Get out of that pretty little head of yours. I want to, believe me I want to - god I can’t even believe I’m saying no to you right now-” He started, eyes boring into yours with a genuine warmth. “But I like you too much, I really don’t wanna fuck this up with you by going too fast, too soon.” He explained. 

Your heart melted at his words, how the hell did this sweetheart of a man fall into your lap?

“Yeah, I get it.” You said. “We have plenty of time to get to that later on.” You agreed, despite your pussy scolding you for denying her what you could only imagine as ‘life changing dick’. 

Jack smiled at you, relived you understood where he was coming from. He kissed you again, savoring the taste of you, the feeling of you on him.

“Buuut...” he started, leaving warm hot kisses along your neck. “That doesn’t mean we can’t have a lil’ fun.” Jack said as his hands began to run down your sides.

“Oh yeah?” You feigned obliviousness. “What’d you have in mind?” You asked. 

“Just wanna make you feel good, s’that okay baby?” He asked, continuing to kiss you. 

“Yes, more than okay.” You breathed out, his touch making your head spin.

“Just tell me to stop and I’ll stop, no questions asked.” He told you, squeezing your hand in reassurance. 

Jack kissed down your neck, kissing between the valley of your clothed breasts, down to where the skin of your tummy peeked out - kissing right above your navel, and all over your pooch. His hands slid up the skirt you were wearing and you momentarily thanked god in your head that you decided against pants today. His fingertips reached the lace of your panties, and he pressed his thumb against your clit through your panties. 

“Fuck- just like that, yeah.” You whined.

“So wet, shit-, this all for me?” He inquired

“Yes-, all for you Jack, just you.” You cried out as he continued to rub you through the thin material.

“Fuck Y/N, you have no idea what you do to me..” he groaned out, as he rutted his hips against the mattress, desperate for a little relief.

His fingers tucked into the waistband of your panties, and he looked at you to see if you had a change of heart. You smiled at him.

“Please Jack, make me feel good.” You bit your lip, pleading for him to make a move.”

“Your wish is my command, princess.”

Jack pulled your panties from your pussy, a string of arousal connecting between the two before it broke as he threw the black thong to the side.

Without warning, Jack dipped his head between your legs and began to eat you out.

“Fuck! Oh my god- yesyesyes-“ you cried out as he demolished your sweet pussy. His nose pressed on your clit with the perfect amount of pressure, rubbing against you as he pulled at your hips to nuzzle his face closer against your cunt.

“God you taste phenomenal, of course you fuckin’ do.” He laughed before taking your hands in his intertwining your fingers as he dove back into your pussy, face first.

Jack alternated between licking and tongue fucking you, and sucking and kissing your clit, driving you crazy at how fucking good he was at this.

You felt your core tighten, your release close. “G-gonna cum Jack, fuck don’t stop-“ you moaned, your hands squeezing his as you rutted your hips against his face. Jack let go of your hands and settled them on your hips with a firm grip. He groaned and the vibration from his throat sent you over the edge.

“Oh, shitshitshit, ah!” You cried out, your hands in his hair now, pulling on his curls as you rode your orgasm out. Jack kept sucking on your clit, overstimulating you until you pushed at his head.

You laid back in the sheets, sweat gleaming on your skin as a few strands of hair stuck to your forehead; and Jack was mesmerized at the sight. He couldn’t picture anything else more beautiful than your blissed out face- eyes screwed shut, lips puffy from your precious make-out sesh, and your skin gleaming so beautifully from the orgasm he just caused you to have.

He crawled up next to you as you recovered from your intense orgasm, kissing your lips a few times before planting a kiss on your forehead and bringing you into his arms.

“Fuck, you’re really good at that.” You finally broke the silence. Jack let out a hearty laugh as he pulled you closer to him.

“Thanks. I’ve been meaning to practice some more though be a little more selfless, ya know?” He joked.

“Well, anytime you’re in the spirit of giving again, don’t be afraid to hit my line.” You laughed into his neck.

“Trust me baby, you’ll be the first and only person I call.” He chuckled, bringing you into another sweet kiss.

——————————————————

Tag list: @hoodharlow @moody4world @watercolorskyy @lcandothisallday @harlowthot @triplexdoublex @thinkingaboutjharlow @bbyharlow @jackharlows-world @primadxna-girl @curlyhairclub @dessmxsworld @inluvwithladybug @babyharleezy @thysagclub @harlowcomehome @rebelxsun @jackharloww

#jack harlow #jack harlow concepts #jack harlow imagine #jack harlow x reader #jack harlow x you #jack harlow blurb #jack harlow smut #jack harlow x y/n #jack harlow fluff

[ladylooch]

Hiii! How about recently starting a relationship with Nico before the summer break, and obviously not traveling back home with him since it is far too early to meet the family. But now he is back in the States with his entire family and they are dying to meet you but you are still a little apprehensive about it all. 😊

Nico's New Girlfriend

A/N: Ooo I hate how long this took. So sorry, anon! Thank you for your patience 😘

Word Count: 1.3k

Warnings: None!

Nico is barely awake on the phone screen in your hand. You are both watching the final episode of Ted Lasso together via FaceTime while he is back home in Switzerland- 3,900 miles away, not that you’re counting. His eyes are droopy, long lashes extending out to dust along his cheek bones. He promised if you two watched a show together, he would be able to stay awake longer. Poor thing has been training so hard. His eyes were sluggish when the opening credits began.

“Nico. You should go to sleep.” You say, startling him back awake.

“I’m not sleepy.” He mumbles back, widening his eyes and looking back at his TV. 

“You are. And you need to be up early for your Nashville flight.” Nico sighs, running a hand through his hair as he sits up, clicking the TV off.

“It’s hard knowing I’m going to be flying over you and not seeing you.” He grumbles. Nico invited you to attend the NHL awards with him this week, but it all felt too soon. You both discussed it at length. But your apprehension won. This is so new and meeting his whole family on a massive, public scale while being photographed with him felt like too much. How would you live with those pictures out there forever if things were to end? You shiver again at the uncomfortable thought of losing him.

“I know. I’m sorry.” You bite at your fingernail regretfully.

“It’s okay. I want you to be comfortable. Maybe by Christmas.”

“Definitely by Christmas.”

“Good, Nina makes the best hot chocolate with whipped cream and nutmeg on top.” Nico sighs as he remembers it. “I can’t wait to share you with them. You should know they have been asking about you. They told me I should beg you to reconsider.” You pout at him, loving the way his eye crinkle in the corners with his small smile.

After many more attempts to get Nico off the phone, he finally agrees to go to bed. You go about the rest of your day in the afternoon, doing some shopping and preparing for the week ahead at work. You fight off the Sunday scares by going to bed early.

That night, while you’re sleeping, a Hischier you haven’t met drops into your Instagram DMs. 

Hi Y/N, it’s Nina, Nico’s sister. I am sorry to introduce myself so abruptly, but… I think you need to know how sad Nico is that you are not joining us in Nashville. He won’t say anything to you because he does not want to put pressure on you. But he wants you there. He feels his success this year was because of your support. He wishes to share it with you, whether he wins or not. Please reconsider! I’ll help with whatever I can!

You smile, biting your lip at hearing from Nina. Nico loves her. And talks of her often. He is convinced you two will be best friends. To hear from her with such a heartfelt and honest confession does something to your reservations. It cancels most of them from your brain and before you even know what you’re doing, you’re booking a last minute flight to Nashville. The price and fees are outrages and the flight time is shit, but damn, Nico is worth it.

It takes assistance from one of the WAGS to get in touch with a Devils’ employee who can assist with getting you close to Nico for the surprise. The NHL Awards are sure to be locked down with security and you need to be sure you can see him. You suit up into a simple black dress that isn’t eye catching, but fancy enough that you can walk into the arena with him. Your pass is tucked safely in your clutch to avoid being stolen. Your hair falls in curled tendrils down your shoulders and a pair of strappy sandals help give you some heigh to push your way through the crowd. Once you’re at the fencing, your fingers fiddle with the picture of Nico in your hands for him to sign.

The Devils nominees all arrive together. You smile, watching as Nico awkwardly navigates around, showing his suit, doing interviews, and shifting around from foot to foot at all the attention. Fans scream his name from every direction. His family searches the crowd for you while Nico tends to his captaincy duties. Fans line the bike rack all around you. They press you further up against the rack as other players walk by, signing and posing for pictures. They can grab whatever they want from these other players. You only care about one. 

Nico gets closer, nibbling his lip and signing every thing thrusted in front of his face. He’s so gracious with fans, even when he doesn’t want to be.

“They deserve the best from me.” He told you once before when you were stopped multiple times while out at dinner. He had offered to say no to these interactions when you were together, but you loved watching Nico in this setting. The way he takes time to ask follow up questions and makes sure the picture turned out right or giving hugs when asked. 

And that’s how you know he will come to you without any effort on your part.

You don’t say anything as he gets to the kid right next to you. He barely is looking up anymore, just trying to sign as many things as he can before the NHL representative pushes him into the arena. He reaches for the picture in your hands as his family stops behind him to watch you two. Nina makes eye contact with you excitedly while pulling up her phone to film the interaction.

“Do you think I could have a picture?” You wonder, leaning a bit more forward. Nico snaps up at the sound of your voice. He grins, electricity jolting through you at being the recipient of that awestruck look.

“Babe…” He is in disbelief but smiling so wide his dimples pinch perfect slits into his cheeks. “What?”

“Surprise!”

He can only stare back at you. His hand is paused with the picture between you, marker hovering. Fans call out his name insistently, but he can’t pull his eyes off of you. You step onto the bike rack, reaching out for him to move closer. He does wrapping his arms around your waist as the security guard is getting ready to yell at you.

He buries his face into the nook of your neck. You press your nose into his hair, closing your eyes to ignore the hundreds of cameras taking pictures of you. Those pictures are posted on social media stories across a handful of platforms. It won’t take long for the fans to find you. What scared the shit out of you a week ago now gives new life as you realize why Nico wanted you here so bad. Its so obvious in the way he holds you and cradles your face when he pulls away to kiss you.

Nico Hischier is in love with you.

“I can’t… tell you what this means to me.” 

“You don’t have to… Nina did.” Nico sighs, looking over his shoulder at his sister. He leans back down to hug you again, murmuring that he still isn’t quite sure this is real.

You make eye contact with Nico’s family over his shoulder. The four of them watch their beloved boy crumble into soothing contentment with his new girlfriend. Nico knows he should let you go, but he can’t yet. You feel like home even though he just left home.

His family, the people he adores and honors every moment of his life, know exactly why Nico feels so content now. 

They could see it in the way he talked about you so far this summer. It’s why Nina reached out and Jack smirks as he walks around you two to continue to sign autographs.

You’re the one. Indisputably. And now the rest of the world knows it too.

#nico hischier blurb #Nico Hischer x reader #nico hischier fic #hockey writing #my writing #nhl fan fiction #writing request #new jersey devils

[graneymar]

JUST A FRIEND, PART 2 (Part 1)

SUMMARY: You cut Neymar off after you've come to the realisation that he doesn’t seem to want a serious relationship. The two of you try to move on from one another, but figure out there’s no escaping from your feelings.

WARNINGS: none I think

PAIRING: Neymar x fem!reader (Kylian as your best friend, Sergio as a flirt)

Now that Kylian found out about what was going on between me and Neymar - and me overhearing him saying that he actually does like me - I've been waiting for Ney to open up about his feelings and finally talk to me about it, but it never happened. I didn’t want to be the first one to speak up. I've already broken my best friends trust just to be with him, so I believed he owed me something.

Realising that Neymar wasn’t ready for a serious relationship, or simply didn't want one, while I got more and more attached to him and the little thing we had, I slowly started distancing myself from him. Whenever he called me to come over, I never was able to tell him no before, but knowing I had to get rid of the feelings I developed for him, it was the only right thing to do. So it happened that we haven’t really met in a month now. Yes, I missed him more than anything but I had to stay strong in order to get over my little crush.

Also, after only three weeks of us not seeing each other, he apparently invited his ex, Bruna Biancardi, to stay at his place in Paris. I loved and hated Bruna at the same time. She was a gorgeous woman, a total sweetheart, but she was with the man I wanted so bad.

Kylian and I were chilling on my couch, casually talking and being on our phones, when I clicked on Brunas instagram story, only to see her and Ney watching a movie together in his bedroom. My heart would’ve probably skipped a hundred of beats if I didn’t get used to these images lately. I instantly locked my phone and threw it onto the couch beside me. Kylian moved his head to look at me. "Are you okay?", he asked. I threw the blanket off of me and got up from the couch. "Yeah. I'll do the laundry", I answered. "Have you already washed my hoodie?" Kylian being my best friend meant occasionally having random sleepovers and him always forgetting some kind of clothing - his shirts, hoodies, socks. He always made sure he left something. Half of my closet was his, actually. "It’s in the dryer", I told him as I was collecting clothes around the apartment. "Hey, wanna do a casino night with Ney tomorrow?" Well, now my heart skipped a beat for sure. "With Ney? Why him?" Stupid question, Y/N, stupid question. Kylian shrugged, "Why not?" How was I supposed to get myself out of this situation without admitting I was heartbroken and cried myself to sleep every night over him? "I don’t know, I was just thinking of Achraf earlier and noticed we didn't hang out in ages. How about we ask him to go with us?" I tried to sound as authentic as possible, but Kylian was no one I could lie to. "You're trying to avoid Neymar, aren’t you?" By letting out a soft but desperate chuckle, I tried to hide the the fact that he just caught me. "No? Why would I try to avoid him?" Kylian rolled his eyes at my answer. "Because he’s seeing Bruna again maybe?" I shook my head from left to right. "Couldn’t care less. You know I love her." "Then let’s go with Ney and Bruna." Oh God, I would love to punch Kylian right into his adorable face in this very moment. "Are you insane? I'm not going to hang out with them after what Neymar and I had. It would be disrespectful towards Bru."

"Oh come on, she probably doesn’t even know about it." I crossed my arms in front of my chest and looked at him in disgust. "Do you think her not knowing about it makes it any better? He’s most probably lying to her, saying how much he missed her, talking about how he didn’t have anyone else because he still loves her oh so much, and you want me to simply sit there and support his lies? No Kyks, won't do that." Kylian first furrowed his eyebrows, but started laughing shortly after. "When did you become such a great fan of Bruna?"

"It doesn’t have anything to do with me supporting Bruna, I believe woman should generally respect and support each other whenever they can. Men fuck up our lives already, no need to make it even harder." He remained silent until he quietly gulped and looked me straight in the eyes. "And you’re sure you’re okay with him seeing her and the thing between you two ending?", he finally asked. No, I wasn’t okay, but I didn’t want Kyks to know. Talking about it wouldn’t make it easier anyway. "I'm fine, trust me", I put on a fake smile, "I just wouldn’t want my boyfriend to be around someone he slept with, so I don't want to put Bruna in such a situation."

"Good, as long as you’re alright, I am too", he proudly grinned at me, "Neymar and Bruna are not together though. They're just attempting to get closer again." "Well, hopefully they do", I murmured.

——————————————————————————

Entering the casino, I instantly caught sight of Achraf. He jumped up from his seat and walked towards Kylian and me, hugging the both of us. "I invited some of the boys, I hope you don’t mind", he told us. Of course, the only one I was looking for was Neymar, but I was obviously relieved when he was nowhere to be found. I sat down between Kylian and Sergio as the boys started gambling.

Half an hour and some glasses of champagne later, the boys all decided to use the bathroom, leaving me and Sergio alone. It has probably been just a few minutes, but it felt like an eternity. Sergio and I got along very well, we were joking around and realised we had a lot of similar interests. "I’ll never understand how Kylian decided to be just friends with you", Sergio said, causing me to blush. "We've known each other for forever, we're like brother and sister", I explained. Sergio nodded and smiled, "So, do you think Kylian would be fine with me inviting his 'like a sister' to a date?" My mouth almost fell open, I had a hard time finding the words to respond. "Tomorrow, 7pm, I'll pick you up?", he continued. I hesitatingly nodded as my lips slowly formed a small smile.

The main door swung open and from the corner of my eyes, I saw two figures walk up to us. I turned my head to see who it was and lost my breath the moment Neymar and Bruna stood right in front of me. Neymar eyed me up and down, his gaze eventually got stuck at my thigh, where Sergio casually put his hand on. His facial expression was bloody serious, meanwhile Bruna on the other side shined like the sunshine she was. "Y/N, haven’t seen you in such a long time! How’s life?", she asked and stretched out her arms to hug me. I returned the hug. "Couldn’t be better", I replied, coldly staring into Neymars eyes while still embracing Bruna. He shot me a glare and bit his inner cheek before moving his head to look at Sergio. "What about you? Anything new?", I asked Bru smilingly as I pulled away from her.

Neymar and Bruna sat right across from Sergio and me. I felt Ney watching my every move, especially observing how Sergio and I acted towards each other. I didn’t hear him talking or smile at someone for once at least, he seemed to be absolutely pissed off. No lie, I enjoyed him being mad.

"I'll be back in a minute", I excused myself and walked into the ladys bathroom. Not even five seconds later, I saw Ney coming in. "For ladies only", I simply said, not making an effort to even look at him. "What the fuck do you think you’re doing?", he spoke up. I shrugged before turning my head to him. "I don’t know what you’re talking about."

"You and Sergio. What is going on between you two?", he asked, slowly raising his voice, his brows furrowed. "That’s none of your concern, Neymar." He obviously didn’t expect me to react this way. "I think I have a right to know." I gasped. Who did he think he was? "Where’d you even get that right from? Your ex girlfriend literally has been with you the whole past week and now it is me that owes you an explanation?", I bursted out, my anger level visibly rising. "Have you ever asked yourself why Bruna is even here? First, you cancel all our meetings. Then you're not answering any of my texts and calls. Now I see you being all over Sergio. So yes, Y/N, I expect you to tell me what the fuck made you act this way." I placed myself right in front of Neymar, tilting my head up to look him directly into his eyes. "Bruna being here with you proves that cutting you off was the only right thing for me to do. I was more than wrong when I thought that whatever we had, I don’t even know how to name it, meant the slightest thing to you", I hissed before walking up to the door in order to get out. "How to name it?", he exclaimed and turned around to look at me again. I just wanted to get out, I couldn’t stand being in a room with him any longer, but I felt tears forming in my eyes, causing me to let go of the door knob and listen to his speech. "I'll tell you how I name it, I'll tell you what it meant to me. And it didn’t mean the slightest thing, it meant everything. I've always wanted you, Y/N, always, from the very first day we met. You were the reason I left Bruna. I would’ve never betrayed Kylian the way we did, but to me, it was worth it, 'cause I had you. Because I had you being the first thing I saw in the morning. Because I thanked God every day when I woke up with you in my arms, playing with your hair until you opened your eyes and smiled at me before hiding your face under the blanket. Because I was finally looking forward to come home every day after training, knowing you are there waiting for me. Because I couldn’t stop myself from watching you peacefully sleep every night, not understanding what I did to have someone as perfect as you in my life. Because I love the way your eyes light up when they look into mine; your cute grunt when you laugh too hard; the fact that you still cry after watching Titanic 20 times. Simply because I love everything about you. Simply because I love you, Y/N. Yes, we started our relationship the wrong way, that’s for sure, but I wouldn’t change a thing - expect the situation we are in right now." At this point, endless tears streamed down my face. Tears of joy, of happiness, but also of overwhelmingness. "Please, just say something", he quietly spoke up after seconds of silence. I sobbed before turning around and staring right into these beautiful hazel eyes. Looking at the him made me cry even harder. Finally, I quickly walked up to him and crashed my lips into his. "I love you too, Neymar", I mumbled inbetween the kisses.

#neymar #neymar jr #football imagine #football imagines #imagine #imagines #neymar imagine #neymar imagines #kylian mbappe #neymar jr imagine #neymar jr fanfiction #neymar jr imagines #neymar jr fanfic #neymar fanfic #neymajr #neybappe #neymarjr #neymar junior #neymar jr x you #neymar jr x reader #neymar x y/n #neymar x reader #neymar x you #kylian mbappe imagine #kylian x reader #kylian mbappé #kylian mbappe imagines #kylian imagines #mbappe #mbappé

[cecexsblog]

Meet Me at Our Spot

L. Hughes

synopsis: You’ve known Luke since you were young. Both your family’s had lake houses on Lake Michigan and over the years you and Luke shared a secret get away on the lake near your houses. As you’ve gotten older it hadn’t been in use until now.

warnings: none. very fluffy.

pairings: Luke Hughes x fem!reader

authors note: this is my first tumblr fic. my apologies if it’s not put together properly or written well. I also have no idea how Lake Michigan laws work and the geography of it so let’s just imagine these things happened. Also this is quite slow burn and I took forever to get to the point so sorry about that.

The past two summers weren’t like normal ones at the lake house. Covid had made it really difficult to see all my friends on the lake including the Hughes. Even though their house is just on the other side of the clump of trees by our house we still weren’t able to see each other. Lake patrol would fien us for whatever reason. Covid caused me and my brother to grow away from the Hughes brothers so who knew if this summer will even be worth it. I’m 18 and finally moving so I’ll at least attempt to make it good.

~

“Y/N go grab the dogs bed from the car” my mom yelled at me from the bottom of our stairs. “Poor puppy is sleeping on the hard floor” she said while petting his head. I just rolled my eyes. I could hear a car coming down the road as I stepped down the porch, a loud one. I seen it drive by, I white Ford Bronco. I put two and two together and realized it was Jacks new vehicle I seen it all over Instagram, girls ogling over how he’s a car guy and that’s the hottest thing they’ve ever seen.

“That means the boys are going to be here” I thought to myself. I haven’t seen them in forever, we kind of keep touch over Snapchat and stuff but that’s it.

“Mom! Have you heard from Ellen recently??” I yelled across the house towards the kitchen.

“Hughes?” My mom asked surprised. “Yes she mentioned her and the boys are out this months, Jim had work in Toronto so he won’t be here for a few weeks”

“Okay… well are we going to see them at all” I asked with a pleading smile.

“Y/N you’re 18, all those boys are also older then 18, as well as your brother. Each of you are capable of making plans without me and Ellen” my mom lectured while preparing some sort of charcuterie board.

“Okay but it’s better when you and El make the plans” I whine while stealing some cheese. “You guys have the best plans”

“I’ll talk to her tonight, let them settle in” she answers. I was slightly satisfied with that answer but still needed to debrief before I spoke to any of them.

I decided to go outside and hike around my old “stomping ground”. A little patch of forest between my family’s property and the Hughes property. That’s when I fell upon me and Luke’s tree house. I hadn’t seen it in years, let alone been inside. I decided to go inside, everything left how it was since the last time I was in there when I was 13 and Luke was 14. We had snuck two beers in here then, thinking we were so cool. The cans sat on the desk next to the rocks we painted when we were in elementary. I sat in the hammock that hung from two rafters, still sturdy like before. I swung for a second until I heard rustling outside, I peered through the plaid curtains. There he was, Luke. He looked really good, but still same old Luke. I didn’t want him to think I was watching I snuck back in and began to swing again. The hammock creaking the rafters. That’s when I heard someone start climbing the ladder. Then a head of curly hair appeared in the window making its way to the door. He didn’t see me at first until peering around the door.

“Hi.” I said in a small voice. He just stood there staring at me. Mouth slightly parting.

“Hi.” He said sweetly. I could see his shoulders relax.

“It’s been awhile” I said quietly again.

“You could say that” he said sarcastically. “It’s been forever… you uhh… look so much older” he said with a genuine smile on his face.

“That would make sense, last time I saw you I was 16 Luke.” I say laughing. The last time we seen each other was at the grocery store in town. We both had masks on and couldn’t go near each other but our moms still talked each others ears off of course.

“I couldn’t even see your face that time” he laughed. I just responded with a small laugh looking away at the cans on the desk. “Last time we were in here we thought we were so cool” he said while picking up one of the cans.

“Yeah, that night was so much fun tho. It’s like we knew it would be the last time till now” I said grabbing the other can. That night we had slowly drank the beers while listening to music and fooling around. That night Luke gave me my first kiss. As I said before, it’s like I knew I wouldn’t see him in person for a long time.

“Yeah” he said, I could see blush run over his face. I knew the memory of the kiss came back to him. “Remember playing truth or dare?” He asked.

“Of course! I was the best at it” I say flipping my hair.

“No you weren’t.” He says smiling. “You passed on so many dares, you only won at truths.”

“Nuh uh! Remember when you made me climb to the top of the tree and I almost died?!” I exclaimed.

“Okay okay, but I got the most difficult dares” he said pretending to kick dust on the ground.

“Oh so kissing me was difficult for you?” I asked pretending to act offended.

“No. That’s not what I meant” he said with a smirk. Looking at me with his pretty hazel eyes. Ever since we were little he’d look at me with pleading puppy eyes. Didn’t matter the situation he just did. I folded every time.

“Mhm” I say rolling my eyes and looking away.

“So… what have you been up to?” he asked sitting on the floor in front of me playing with little car that was left in here.

“Well I was in school but now it’s summer so nothing” I say watching him closely as he grows infatuated with the car on the floor.

“You were going to school in Vermont right?” He asked looking up at me sitting on the hammock.

“Yeah” I say quietly. Deep down I wish I went to Michigan with him. My phone lit up, a text from my mom saying dinner is ready. I felt like a kid again with that sort of text. Having to put this time with Luke to halt because of it. “My mom says my dinners ready” I say with a small laugh. I debated inviting him.

“Okay I’ll stay here for a while longer” he said standing up from his spot. We both stood facing each other. And in a split second I found myself wrapping my arms around him. He was significantly taller than me now so my face went right into his chest. I felt his arms wrap around my upper half. “I missed you” he whispered. Butterflies shot through my stomach. I looked up at him.

“I missed you to Lu” I whispered back. A smile tugging at my lips. I pulled away and backed away to the door so I could look at him as I walked out. He followed just until I reached the ladder. “You can come with me if you’d like, my mom would be ecstatic to see you” I called up the ladder.

“Later tonight I think we’re all meeting up” he called. “I’ll see you guys all later”

“Okay” I pouted. As I walked away I blew him a sarcastic kiss. He just shook his head with the biggest smile and went back in the tree house.

~

“I seen Luke on my walk” I said at the dinner table.

“Oh good how’s he doing?” My mom asked. My dad wasn’t going to be up for a few weeks, if he was he’d be giving me a side eye.

“Good I think, we didn’t talk much just sat in our tree house” I said with another cheesy smile.

“Well we’re having a campfire with them later on our beach anyways so maybe you can catch up more then” my mom said, she looked at me waiting for my excitement to take over me. I tried acting nonchalantly but it didn’t work. My brother looked at me like I was stupid.

~

I carried the s’mores essentials down, my brother carried the chairs, and my mom carried a bottle of wine for her and El.

We sat for a couple minutes when we heard them approaching through the trees. Each of us got up and greeted them. Jack and Quinn squeezed me so hard I almost suffocated.

“You better not hug me like that” I said smiling at Luke. He grabbed me and squeezed me harder than the other two did. I pushed him off and ran from him down the dock, he chased me.

“They’re right back where they left off” I heard Jack say.

“Of course they are!” Ellen said, “I swear they’re soulmates”

Luke finally grabbed me and picked me up from behind spinning me around.

“The water looks really nice huh? I know you love swimming” he taunted, pretending to almost throw me in.

“Luke don’t you dare!” I screamed. He put me down but he shouldn’t have put me down while standing at the edge of the dock. I inched closer to him slowly. He grew nervous, I seen pink rush over his face. I put my hand on his shoulders and he reached out for my waist but before he could reach I pushed him in the lake. His head came out of the water, I could see his cheeky smile grow but then leave. He stuck his hand out for help up the dock but instead of climbing out he dragged me in.

“You jerk!” I yelled.

“You started it” he said swimming closer to me. I wrapped my arms around his neck and he put his arms around my waist. This wasn’t out of the ordinary for us. We could both touch here but that didn’t stop me from wrapping my legs around him. He held me close, I put my head in the crook of his neck. The sun was setting in front of us. “Pretty” he whispered.

“Yeah you are” I giggled looking at him.

“I was talking about the sunset” he said rolling his eyes cheekily. “But you know me and the sunset aren’t the only pretty things here” he whispered in my ear. My face grew red and I pulled back from his shoulder to look at him with a flabbergasted look. “What?” He said nonchalantly, acting like he didn’t just say that. We heard footsteps coming down the dock.

“See I told you they were still over here” Quinn said to Jack and my brother while peering down at us. “Shit my bad guys!” He says covering his walking away. “Was not expecting this to happen this fast”

“This?” Luke questioned.

“Nothing” Quinn said with a suspicious smile while side eyeing Jack and my brother. They all laughed.

“Would you guys stop acting all weird and just get in?” I said pulling away from Luke and swimming out further.

The night went on, all of us swimming in our day clothes under the moonlight.

~

It was about 2am when I heard my my phone ring.

“Hello” I groggily say.

“I can’t sleep”

It’s luke.

“Are you serious Luke??”

“Meet me at the tree house” he says and hangs up.

Although I was so tired I got up and snuck out the back door into the woods. He sat at the top of the ladder smiling with a juice box in his hand. The only light around us was the moon.

“You can’t sleep so you keep yourself awake longer by sneaking out to your childhood tree house? Makes sense” I say sarcastically.

“Hey you didn’t have to come out here” he said jokingly.

“Shut up”

I climbed up the ladder, Luke just stood at the top. Once I got up he just kept standing there, I decided to just walk past him inside. He followed me in.

“Truth or dare?” He asked me.

“Absolutely not”

“Why?” He asked. I just stared at him.

“Truth.”

He stood dumbfounded for a second. “Have you kissed any other guy”

“Yes.”

“Who?” He asked, I could see his expression grow slightly jealous.

“Hey! Only one questions per truth” I say. “Truth or Dare” i ask.

“Truth”

I roll my eyes. “Have you kissed another girl?”

“Yeah” he said, slightly ashamed for whatever reason. We went back and forth with truths for what seemed like forever. Every time he was just getting more and more about my love life out of me.

“Truth or dare” he said

I just stared at him blankly. “Dare.”

A smile grew on his face.

“Kiss me” he said quietly while inching towards me. My face turned bright red. The truth is I had only kissed one other boy. My ex boyfriend who had cheated on me and that was over a year ago.

“Luke…” I say staring into his pretty eyes. He turned away.

“I’m sorry I shouldn’t have said that, that was way to fast-

I leaned in and kissed him. Although we were 18 and 19 this felt like such a little kid experience. Like we shouldn’t be doing this.

That kiss only lasted a second but the second one after both leaning in again was long and desperate but sweet. We were both still standing in the middle of the tree house. His hands met the sides of my face and my arms went around his neck lightly tugging at his curls. Our lips over lapping and moving in sync, his nose kept brushing the spot next to mine, slightly cold. When I pulled away I looked up at him into his eyes.

“Hi” he said sweetly with a big smile on his face.

“Hi” I say crinkling my nose.

He leaned down and kissed my forehead. I leaned into his chest again.

•Luke was one of those boys who was so incredibly beautiful. He was made like one of those Greek statues. Broad yet elegant, strong yet gentle. His nose curved and shaped so perfectly, curls falling differently every second, yet perfect every time. He was still and slim yet had the perfect amount of muscle. I hope he knows how beautiful he is. His eyes begging the perfect mix of brown and green, shaped so perfectly, his lashes were whisky and long. One of my favourite parts of him though are his hands, and not in a kinky way. They’re just so slender yet strong looking. Each vein making its way down his wrists perfectly.•

I pulled away from him and grabbed his hands just to analyze them. Measuring them with mine then interlocking our fingers. And looking up at him. He just smiled.

~

I woke up the next morning with the sun on my face. I rolled over to run away but when I did I ran into Luke peacefully sleeping on his stomach. Lips pouting and slightly parted. Eye lashes splayed across his skin. His curls fell over his face making a curtain to block his eyes from the sun. His arms were tucked under the pillow on each side of his head his back upper back displayed in the sun. I ran my fingers down his bare spine and back up. He had little freckles all over his back that looked like stars. I leaned down peppered kisses all over his back, I felt him slightly shift then heard a hum come from his lips.

“Good morning” I whispered into his ear. A smile grew on his face.

“Morning” he whispered back. His eyes still closed.

I looked back over to his back. His muscles slightly flexed from the position of his arms. I leaned back down to his ear letting my lips touch him.

“You’re pretty” I whispered. And just like that I was now trapped in his arms.

Who knew we’d be closer then we ever have been before.

#Spotify #luke hughes #fluff #nj devils #lukey pookie

[somewannabez-lister]

Hiding the Truth

Summary: Y/N was dating Tom Holland until all of the hate comments starting causing a drift which led to their very public break up. Soon after their break up Y/N started writing music, thinking of it as an outlet. She released her music faceless as ‘Ella Raine’ not wanting people to judge her based on her relationship with Tom. What she didn’t expect was for her music to connect to people all over the world. After working on herself over the next two years she is finally ready to reveal her face to the world, but what will happen when she gets an unexpected text from Tom?

Pairing: Tom Holland x Female Reader (famous!reader)

Warnings: References to Lexi Jayde’s ‘closer to closure’ album (does this count as a warning?), slight angst- not really though, fluffy ending

Word count: 2.2k

“Welcome back from the break everyone!” you heard Jimmy Fallon say through your macbook before he announces the next guest. “Tonight we have a very special guest, who just released her debut album ‘closer to closure’, please welcome Ella Raine through zoom!” Jimmy had finally announced you as the next guest as you were laying in bed waiting to say hello.

“Hey Jimmy! Thanks so much for having me on the show.” Being a popular singer, but having nobody know the face behind the music definitely has its perks. For example, you are easily being able to have a meeting with Jimmy Fallon while in you pajamas while laying in bed.

“Ella it is so wonderful having you on the show! Even though we aren’t able to see the face behind all of our favorite songs, we are so grateful that you were willing to be on the show virtually tonight.” Jimmy was being extremely kind and thoughtful of your wishes not to show your face until you were ready. “Thank you Jimmy, that honestly means so much more than you could ever know.” “Yes of course! Well you have obviously accomplished so much in the two years that you have been creating music for us and you have gained so many fans over such little time. How has that process really been for you?”

You thought about this question and what the best way to answer it would be. “It has been quite overwhelming to be honest. When I started releasing my music I was very insecure because people made me feel like I wasn’t good enough, but over these last two years I have been really working on myself and my confidence and I feel the best I have ever felt in my life and it is all from the support of my fans.” You had never been so vulnerable with anyone other than close friends and family so this was a really big step for you. 

“Thank you so much for sharing that Ella. We all appreciate you opening up. As you have revealed on your Instagram, you are revealing your face after two years behind closed doors. What helped you decide that it was time to take this huge step in your career?” This was a big question and you were going to be very honest with all of your fans because you think it is time that you share bigger details about your personal life. “I used to be in the eyes of the media a lot believe it or not. I used to date someone that is in the public eye pretty much everyday. I started getting a lot of hate from his fans saying I was “too skinny” or that “I wasn’t good enough for him”. That obviously didn’t make me feel good about myself. Over these two years I have learned that you shouldn’t care what other people think about you because they aren’t even major players in your game. If they don’t make you happy, then what is the point of wasting any time and energy on them. I have truly found my confidence and so I am completely ready to show my face to the world.”

“Wow, that is incredible. You have just revealed that people already know what you look like, but they haven’t put your face to you name.” “Yes, although I have been using a fake name for all of my music so that people wouldn’t judge me off of who they think I am. I also look very different than I did two years ago from working out, to experimenting with different hairstyles. I feel a lot better about myself now though. I really don’t think anybody will be able to tell who I am once I show my face unless I tell everyone my actual name.”

“You are really giving us a lot of information right now and I don’t know how much more I can take!” Everyone began laughing. “Yes, well I am done sharing my personal details until I do my face reveal which will be happening on Friday!”

This news shocked everyone. You had told everyone that you would be face revealing sometime within the next week, but nobody knew that it was on Friday. “That is two days from now!” You laughed at Jimmy’s exclamation. “Yes, but I really can’t put it off any longer! Until then though, you guys can stream my album ‘closer to closure’ on all streaming platforms!”

“Wow, well thank you so much for coming on the show Ella. Ella Raine everybody!” After saying your goodbyes, you shut you macbook and checked the time. It was almost 10 pm so you decided to get a snack and get ready for bed.

Just as you were about to get up, you got a text message from your ex boyfriend. You haven’t talked to him in over two years, since the break up. You were extremely confused as to why he would be texting you this late on a Wednesday after not speaking for over two years.

Tom

Hey, I know we haven’t talked in a while, but I was listening to Ella Raine today and this song reminded me of you. Song: Drunk Text Me

This was the last thing you expected from Tom. He just sent you a song that you wrote about him, but he didn’t know that. Suddenly, your snack seemed significantly irrelevant. You decided that you wanted to respond, but you didn’t know what to say. You obviously missed Tom. He wasn’t the reason your relationship crashed and burned. Should you just tell him the truth? “Hey Tom, yea that song reminds me of you too- oh why? Because I wrote it! About you! Isn’t that just so hilarious! Like the Charlie Puth song! hahaha”

Yea no- you couldn’t tell him. You will just respond as if you’ve never heard the song before! Yea, that’s it!

Y/N

Hey Tom, it has been a while since we’ve talked. I’ve never heard of that song or artist before, but I will be sure to listen to the song. :)

Oh no, was the smiley face to much? Should you have sent that? Are you freaking out over nothing? Probably- right?

Tom

...

He’s typing again? He wants to have a conversation? Does that mean he misses me? That’s great!- well now super great, but good, yea good.

I can’t believe you haven’t heard of her. She’s as big as Taylor Swift now!

Wait- that’s not why i’m texting you. I’m texting you because I wanted to know if we could meet up sometime soon.

Did he really just ask you to hang out?

Only because I want that one hoodie that you kept of mine of course!

You knew it was too good to be true.

Y/N

Yea, of course you can have your hoodie back. Do you want to come over and get it tomorrow? I still live in the same apartment.

You. Just. Invited. Your. Ex. Over. What were you thinking?! You obviously weren’t.

Tom

Yea! That sounds great. See you then. :)

Okay Tom was coming to your apartment tomorrow. What’s the worst that could- oh. Oh no. He doesn’t know that you changed your look. You wanted a clean slate and now your ex boyfriend was going to know that Y/N L/N is Ella Raine after Friday.

What did you do Y/N?

------------------------

It was now Thursday afternoon and you were waiting for Tom to show up at your apartment. You had no idea what was about to happen, but you had to prepare yourself for every scenario possible.

Before you got to practice even one scenario, he was here. Yippee! No time to study. Just like a pop quiz!

You opened your door to let Tom in. He was facing the other way so all you saw was the back of his head. Once he heard the door open, he swung around quickly and saw your face. 

“Y/N? Is that you?”

You were surprised that even Tom barely recognized you.

“In the flesh.” Tom just continued staring at you in astonishment. He didn’t know how to react with you standing in front of him. You had definitely changed since he’d seen you last and for the better. Tom thought you were stunning before and he did not think you could look better, but you proved him wrong.

“uh- Tom?” He was suddenly knocked out of his stunned state.

“Oh- yes, uhm sorry. Hi.” he stated shyly.

“Hi”, you said with a slight smile. “Uhm come on in!”

“Yea, thanks.” You both walked into your kitchen where Tom’s hoodie was sitting on the counter. You both stood there in awkward silence not knowing what to say or do. 

“So, uh- here is your hoodie back. Sorry for keeping it for so long. I didn’t know you wanted it back since you gave it to me.”

“No, Y/N. I’m sorry, I don’t really want the hoodie back. I texted you because I miss you and I haven’t been able to move on since we’ve broken up. I simply can’t get over you. I keep going on all of these dates, but they never work out because I always compare all of those girls to you. You have set the bar so high in my mind that there is literally nobody that could be my girlfriend better than you could. I know that with our relationship being so public and all of my fans attacking you for being with me it was really difficult, but I think we can make it work this time.”

You were honestly speechless. You obviously wanted to get back together with him, but with you being Ella Raine and him not knowing that made things a lot more difficult. Your face reveal was tomorrow, so if you just told him who you were now and got back together, everyone would just think that Ella Raine and Tom Holland were dating right? Nobody would draw the connection between Y/N L/N and Ella Raine- right?

“Sorry, I know this is a lot and I shouldn’t have just word vomitted all of me feelings up right now, but I really just needed to tell you.”

“I have something going on right now that is making us get back together really difficult right now.”

“Uhm okay well what is it? Maybe we could work around it.”

You really didn’t want to confuse things with him right now. You really want to get back together, but he needs to know the truth before you do that.

“Do you think you could come back tomorrow at 4?”

Tom looked as if he was thinking very hard.

“Well Ella Raine is doing her face reveal at 3 and I don’t know how long that is going to take-” he murmurs to himself under his breath. “I think so- I will try my best.” He softly smiles at me.

-------------------------------------

It was finally Friday. The day of the reveal. You were very excited, overwhelmed, and worried all at the same time. What would Tom think once he knows that you are Ella Raine?

You’re doing a live stream at 3 to do your face reveal, so that left you just under 2 hours to get ready. So, you headed to the bathroom to get your hair, makeup, and outfit done.

It was 10 ‘till 3 and you were setting everything up. You had no idea how many people were going to join this stream, or if it was even going to work.

It was now time to start and everything was in place, so you were just going to go for it. 

*ellaraine has started a live stream*

Your face was now officially out there for the world to see. “Hey everyone! Welcome into my first livestream as a non-faceless singer.” You giggled.

Comments instantly started flooding in.

+ Wait-- why is she actually stunning

+ Guys... I did not expect her to be this pretty...

Suddenly... *tomholland2013 has joined*

This is it. This is the moment Tom finds out you’re Ella Raine.

Tom’s POV

It was finally 3.00 on Friday afternoon, meaning I get to see what Ella Raine looks like. When I tried joining the live it was connecting for a few minutes before I was finally let in.

I covered my eyes because I wasn’t ready to see what my favorite singer looks like. Once I uncovered them I saw the best thing that I could have possibly seen. I saw Y/N on the other side of the screen. Now I understand why she wanted to wait until today to talk. It all makes sense now.

Narrator’s POV

You received very positive comments from your live stream and you were very happy with the results. The moment you shut off your live, you heard a banging at your door. Once the door opened and revealed Tom standing on the other side, he immediately stepped towards you and kissed you gently. You were startled at first, but then began kissing back.

Once the both of you pulled away, Tom said, “I’m ready to get back together with you and people don’t have to know that you’re Y/N until you’re ready, but I want you back in my life, as my girlfriend that is. You laughed at his forwardness, but then pulled him back into a kiss to show him that you agree.

#tom holland x reader #tom holland and y/n #tom holland x you #tom holland fluff #tom holland x famous!reader #tom holland fic #tom holland x ex!reader #tom holland fanfic #tom holland fanfiction

[ageofbarbarians]

Pull Over // J.M.K

AgeOfBarbarians

A/N: this was an old Harry fic of mine. I’m so sorry if there are any name typos im pretty sure i got them all though

Summary: Y/N goes on a date with Josh. They decide to take a little drive and have a picnic

Warnings: 18+ MINORS DNI! Unprotected Sex, Oral Sex (m&f receiving), Choking, Spanking, Edging

Word Count: 5.1K

M A S T E R L I S T

“You have to tell me everything about it. I don’t want any missing details! Do you think anything will happen?” Your best friend, Aluora, shouted excitedly through the phone. She had been your best friend since kindergarten but ever since you moved you haven’t seen her in a while. You two talked every day and it’s like nothing had ever changed even though you were on opposite sides of the country.

“I won’t I promise, but I don’t think so. I told myself I was going to take things slow. I told him that too. He hasn’t even kissed me yet! I mean I wouldn’t have minded because it’s just a kiss and I wanted to so bad but I’m not one to make the first move, you know that.” You shrugged. Your phone was set up against the sink and wall as you continued to get ready since you were on FaceTime.

“Wow what a gentleman. Most guys try to fuck after the first date. He must be a keeper.” Aloura laughed and you laughed with her.

“Tell me about it. I hope he is though. He’s one of the sweetest guys I’ve ever met and god, he is so damn sexy.” You threw your head back at your last words and you could hear her laugh through the other end.

“Do you have any pictures of this mystery man? I still have yet to see what he looks like. You haven’t even told me his name!” She groaned. You grabbed your phone and went to his Instagram page and screenshotted a picture of him.

“Before I show you, you have to promise me you won’t freak out. I have no idea how it happened, but it did.” You point your finger at the screen and Aloura put both hands up in the air to show she wouldn’t.

You sent over the picture and as soon as it went through all you could hear was the loudest scream out could possibly imagine. You turned down the volume on your phone a few notches before she blew a speaker.

“Y/N, you’re fucking kidding me. Josh Kiszka!? You’re lying.” She shook her head in disbelief. Aloura was a huge fan of Greta Van Fleet's music which is one of the main reasons you didn’t tell her because you knew she’d freak out.

“I’m not lying. Again, I have no idea how it happened.” You continued to do your makeup, opening your mouth just so you could apply your mascara.

“Y/N, I need to meet all of them. Seriously like we have to go to a show or something.” She begged. You shook your head as you laughed at her pleading. You still had yet to see them perform but from your understanding, they were currently on a break from touring so they could work on new music. 

“They aren't even touring right now. But, depending on how all of this goes maybe I'll see what I can do...” You stood still for a minute trying to rack your brain of all of the possibilities.

"I can't believe you are seeing a member from my favorite band and you just decided to keep it from me. What kind of bullshit is that?" She questioned. You could see the stupid smile on her face and you knew she was freaking out internally but didn't want to show it. 

"Because I knew you'd react like this." You laughed. You were in the bathroom finishing the final touches on your hair and makeup waiting for your date to arrive. You smiled at the thought of being able to see Josh again. The two of you were going on a second date. Nothing too fancy, just going for a drive and possibly a picnic if the weather decided to clear up. You hadn't been in Michigan long but you were loving it so far. You only had a few friends here that you knew from high school since they moved for college but after you had graduated you just needed a change. Granted it was a few years since you had graduated, but better late than never right? 

You worked at a cafe that was down the street from your apartment and the money was good. You made a few friends through work but still had yet to hang out with any of them. You were a homebody and without Aloura here, things just weren't the same.  You still missed her more than anything. 

Right as you finished applying a thin layer of lip gloss you heard three knocks at the door. You gave yourself one last look over before turning off the light and exiting the bathroom to make your way to the front door.

“I gotta go he’s here. I love you!” You wave to Aloura and you end the FaceTime call. You took a deep breath, butterflies filling your stomach. You answered the door to see Josh standing there holding an assorted bouquet. Different types of white, yellow, orange, and pink flowers. You didn’t know what any of them were besides the sunflowers and daisies.

"Josh, you didn't have to get me flowers! You're too sweet." You grabbed them from him and stepped to the side so he could come into your apartment. You walked over to the small kitchen and tried to find a vase of some sort to put them into. You found a tall, skinny, black vase and filled it with water before setting the flowers inside to set on the counter. 

"Pretty flowers for a pretty girl. I couldn't just show up empty-handed. We’re you talking to somebody?" Josh shrugged casually and wrapped his arm around your waist before planting a small kiss on your cheek. You could feel your cheeks heat up at the small gesture as it took you slightly off guard since you guys haven't even shared a first kiss yet. Not that it was a huge deal, anyway, just a surprising gesture.

“Yeah, I was on the phone with my best friend. M’nervous to be honest.” You mumbled the last part. You played with your fingers for a moment waiting for a response from him.

“Nervous? What for?” He asked. There were plenty of reasons why you were nervous.

“I’m not sure.” You lied. Lying was never a good thing to start in a new relationship, or whatever this was, but you didn’t want to turn it into a whole thing.

You had just gotten out of a tough relationship a couple of months prior. One of your friends had introduced you to Josh and the two of you hit it off almost immediately. You told him from the very beginning that you wanted to take things slow, and he was doing just that. On your first date, the two of you went to a nice restaurant and got ice cream afterward. Even though you told him you wanted to take things slow, you were shocked he didn't kiss you after bringing you home. A kiss is just a kiss, anyway. 

"I packed some stuff for us. I thought maybe we could have a little picnic. Has the weather cleared up any? I haven't looked outside." You grabbed the small basket from the fridge and pulled it out. There was an assortment of sandwiches, chips, fruit, and even a bottle of wine with some glasses just to spice things up a little. 

"That sounds nice, mama. I have some blankets in the back of my car. But a little bit, yeah. It's still pretty cloudy outside but it feels nice. Should we go?" Josh nodded his head and grabbed the small basket from your hands so you wouldn't have to carry it. You nodded in response and grabbed your phone and purse before the two of you walked down to his car. 

"You know, I had an amazing time last weekend. I know I told you multiple times already but I genuinely did." You stared at your feet as you walked down the hall and eventually down the stairs since you lived on the second floor of your apartment building. 

"I did too. I'm really glad we're going out again. I wasn't expecting a picnic though, luckily I have a couple of extra blankets in my car." Josh opened the door and stepped to the side holding it open so you could go first. He followed right behind you and then made his way back next to you. 

"Did you get a new car?" You questioned as you went up to the passenger door you were going to open it yourself but Josh stopped you as he swatted your hand away.

"Hey now, that's my job. But yes, I did." He gave you a playful glare before shooting his signature grin at you. He opened the door for you and you hopped into the passenger seat. Josh got into the driver's seat and sat the basket down by your feet to make sure it didn't tip over.

You looked down at the pale yellow sundress with little daisies printed all over. It was one you had just bought recently and you figured this date would be perfect to wear it for the first time. It wasn't anything special but it was a new favorite piece that you added to your closet. You could feel Josh's eyes on you before he finally spoke up

"You look absolutely beautiful, Y/N. I'm sorry I didn't say anything sooner." Josh scanned your body for a minute and the action alone sent chills down your spine. There was just something so intimidating about his gaze that you found it hard to make eye contact with him sometimes.

"You don't have to apologize, it's not like I was expecting any sort of compliment. But thank you." You blushed at his compliment and looked down at your feet. Josh pulled away from the curb and began driving towards the coast. He slipped on a pair of sunglasses that seemed to fit his face perfectly. He turned up the radio a bit and music played softly throughout the car. 

After driving for about fifteen minutes, the drive was filled with quiet music coming from the radio, but silence from the two of you. As you observed the scenery and you let him focus on driving. The wind had picked up which caused your dress to ride up slightly on your freshly shaven legs. Josh put his hand on your thigh and began to rub small circles with his thumb. The simple touch sent jolts of electricity through your body. He hadn't even done anything and he was already driving you crazy. You bit your lip before looking over at him, and he had the smallest smirk on his face, almost like he knew the effect he had on you. You observed his features from the side and scanned his body. He wore a white long-sleeve shirt with a pair of khakis and the outfit was accompanied by a pair of white Converse. The look was so simple yet he looked so insanely hot. His curly locks were blowing in the wind and every few minutes he would take his hand off the wheel and push them back, still keeping his other hand on your thigh. His hand moved up your thigh slightly, the dress moving over the top of his hand.

You looked back out the window to avoid any more wandering thoughts but they genuinely were getting the best of you. You had made a promise to yourself to take things slowly but there was just something about Josh that made you want to forget all of that. You trusted him fully, he hasn’t given you a reason not to. He was completely understanding of wanting to take things slow because of your past relationship and he never tried to break any of those boundaries thus far.

The thoughts never strayed though. You thought about what his fingers and mouth might feel like against your core, what his lips would feel like intertwined with yours. Everything about what his touch would be like took over your mind. 

You shifted in your seat and you could feel his eyes on you. A wave of heat crept to your core and you bit your lip again. All of the possibilities going through your mind.

We're going slow. You made a promise to yourself.

Josh's hand moved a little further, his fingers gripping your inner thigh and his thumb still rubbing small circles. Every time he would make a circle his thumb would slightly graze the inner part of your leg that meets your pelvic bone. You leaned your head to the side against the headrest and let out a shaky breath, hoping he wouldn't notice. You could feel your cheeks getting hot at the simple contact but he was just lighting you on fire. 

“Y/N I know you want to take things slowly but fuck, you’re driving me crazy.” His voice was deep and he adjusted in his seat, pulling on the material of his pants to relieve some of the stress.

“In a good way, I’m hoping?” You laughed softly and Josh laughed with you. You obviously could tell how frustrated he was with the way he adjusted himself.

“Yes. In a great way even. Frustrating, but in a good way.” He nodded and squeezed your thigh a little tighter this time. You put your hand over the top of his and move it closer to your core, assuming he’d gotten the hint.

"Tell me to stop, and I'll stop." He spoke quietly, but just quietly enough for you to hear him. His thumb grazed over your heat, slowly starting to rub small circles over the clothed damp center. He continued his slow, circular movements for a few minutes and every time he made a complete pass you could just feel yourself getting hotter. He looked over at you for a moment to gauge your reaction and your eyes fluttered closed.

"Don't stop." You shook your head and as you did, you could feel the dampness becoming more prominent and you knew he could feel it too. You hummed to yourself and let the overwhelming feelings just take control. You lifted your dress ever so slightly to reveal the black lace underwear you put on this morning. Josh's eyes went back and forth between your hips and the road. A small groan left his lips as he tried to observe the material as best as he could while still trying to focus on driving.

"Fuck, Y/N, you're going to make me crash this damn car.” Josh chuckled but never stopped his movements, if anything he sped them up. A soft moan left your lips that you were praying he heard just to get more of a rise out of him.

"Should I pull over somewhere? Say the word and I will." He asked swiftly, eyes going back and forth between you and the road again. You nodded your head but that wasn't good enough for him.

"I want to hear you say it. Do you want me to pull over?" His voice was low. You could hear the dominance in his voice and it was incredibly sexy. 

"Pull over." And without a second thought, Josh quickly pulled over down a dirt road. He sped up to get down faster and you hit a pretty private field. There wasn't anybody around and it was almost like he knew this was here. Maybe it was just sheer luck. Or was that his plan? 

Josh faced his car towards the flowery field. The sight itself was gorgeous but it was the last thing you could focus on right now.

Josh threw the car into park and turned off the ignition. He undid both your seatbelts and focused all of his attention on you. His fingers moved over your clothed entrance again, teasing you at every chance he could get.

"Please don't be a tease, Josh." You moaned, shifting your hips to gain more friction against his hands. His movements would go at a slow, steady pace before he would speed them up again and repeat the process all over again. 

"Let's get out, yeah?" Josh opened his door before rushing over to your side and opening your door for you. He put one arm behind your back and the other underneath your legs before lifting you out. You couldn't help but laugh at his antics but also at how needy he was. Granted you wanted this more than anything but you were hiding it more than Josh was. 

He brought you to the front of the car and sat you on the hood. It wasn't hot but it was warm enough to make your legs sweat a little. It was a nice heat, but from how hot and bothered you were it definitely wasn't helping.

"Are you sure you want me on the hood of the car? You said you just got it." You questioned. Josh positioned his body between your legs and brought one of his hands to the back of your neck.

"That's exactly where I want you, darling." He smirked before his lips crashed down onto yours. You took in a deep breath through your nose as the action caught you slightly off guard. Your eyes fluttered closed and you leaned a little more into the kiss. His tongue grazed your bottom lip, requestion permission to enter. You opened your mouth slightly to allow his tongue to slip in, both of yours fighting for dominance. At the same time, a groan rumbled from his chest as a moan escaped yours.

Josh's lips moved from yours to your cheek, to your neck, and down towards your collarbones, sucking and biting a little harder in some places that you knew were bound to leave lilac marks. With every kiss, he just kept sinking lower and lower until he was on his knees in front of your clothed core. He bunched up your dress at your waist and placed his fingertips at the sides of the lace underwear.

"Y/N, I mean it, tell me to stop at any point and I will. If anything gets too rough or you're uncomfortable just tell me."

"I want you to do anything but stop. Please." You whimpered. His eyes flashed a darker shade before he ripped the lace right off your hips. The tear created a slight sting against your skin and you hissed a little.

"Josh, those were my favorite!" You whined. 

"I'll buy you more, I promise." He smirked as one of his hands made contact with your heat. Arousal pooled between your legs with every little touch he made and it was clear that he knew it was because of him. His thumb made circles against your bundle of nerves and the small bit of pressure caused a moan to escape past your lips.

"I wanna taste you, darling." He whispered just loud enough for you to hear.

"Please," was all you could say before his mouth attacked your core. A lengthy moan escaped your lips at the fact he had finally made some sort of contact with you. He sucked on your bundle of nerves causing your legs to shake slightly. You're pretty sure he noticed as his arms wrapped around them to keep you as still as he could.

"Fuck, Josh," You moaned as Josh licked a long slow strip up your core. Your hands moved to his hair and you tugged slightly which earned a groan from him that vibrated against you. His fingers teased your entrance before he entered one finger, curving it upwards to hit the spot you didn't even know existed. A louder moan left your lips as he pumped one of his fingers in and out of you before adding another one. You looked down at him to see all of the dirty things he was doing to you. Right as you looked down at him you noticed that his eyes were already focused on you, observing every breath, moan, and whimper you made under his touch. 

"Shit, I think I'm going to cum, fuck, Josh, don't stop," You gasped as you felt the familiar feeling beginning to spiral in your stomach. You threw your head back and let out a series of moans. Before you could even feel the release of your climax, Josh halted all of his movements, removed his fingers, and stood up. His hands cupped your face before planting a slow kiss on your lips. You could taste yourself against him before he pulled away and planted a small kiss on the tip of your nose. 

"How about some wine, yeah?" Josh smirked as you stared at him in disbelief. Was he seriously just about to leave you like this?

"W-what the fuck?" That was all you could manage to say. You genuinely were at a loss for words. What the fuck is this?

Josh walked over to the back of his car and grabbed a couple of blankets that he had mentioned he had and started to set them up as you just sat on the hood of his car in disbelief. As he sat down on the blankets he began to take the wine and glasses out of the basket. 

You hopped off the hood of the car and sat down next to Josh as he poured some wine for the both of you. He handed you yours first as you glared at him and you pretty much chugged the glass from frustration. Not that it was something you shouldn't get pissed about, but you were livid. 

"What's the matter, mama?" Josh had a stupid grin on his face, knowing exactly what he was doing to you. You grabbed the bottle of wine from his hands and poured yourself another glass, drinking this one just as fast as the other.

"Oh nothing, just having the worst experience of getting denied what was probably going to be the best orgasm of my entire life. What the fuck do you think is wrong Josh?" You shot at him. You rolled your eyes and faced the field and watched the way the flowers and grass swayed with the breeze. You felt one of his hands grab your jaw and he turned your head towards him.

"The best, eh?" He smirked and you couldn't help but roll your eyes again.

"At this point, make it the worst." You huffed and crossed your arms over your chest. You made eye contact with Josh and he had a serious look on his face with one of his brows raised. You knew you hit a nerve. 

You felt one of Josh's hands wrap around your arm and pull you up, practically dragging you toward his car. He walked around to the front and pushed you down over the top of the hood of the car. You felt your dress bunch up around your hips and your arms were forced behind your back, leaving your chest and your head pressed up against the hood. Josh's lips attacked your heat again only for a moment before he gripped your dainty wrists with one of his hands. You heard the zipper of his jeans and knew he was lowering his jeans. He pushed them down to about the middle of his thighs and he teased your slick folds with the tip of his cock.

"Fuck Josh, please don't be a tease I hate that shit." You groaned. 

"Do you really deserve my cock so easily? Especially after your little tantrum?" Josh continued his antics and you rolled your eyes.

"It wasn't a tantrum, it's just bullshit that you-- oh fuck," It was only seconds after the words left your mouth that you felt him stretching you out and a long moan escaped your lips at his size. He was honestly bigger than you were expecting him to be.

Josh's pace started slow, giving you some time to adjust to him but it wasn't long before his thrusts became sharper and quicker. You so badly wanted to just run your hands all over his body and watch all of his movements but it didn't seem like it was going to happen since it didn't seem like he was going to let go of your wrists anytime soon.

"We'll see about this being the worst, mama," Josh whispered in your ear before sending another sharp thrust into you. A loud whimper left your mouth and your moans were almost becoming pornographic. He had a perfect rhythm going and it didn't seem he was going to let up anytime soon. His thrusts were intense and hard, not giving you any mercy. 

He let go of your wrists but one of his hands came up and wrapped itself around your throat. He didn't apply any pressure since he wasn't sure if you were okay with it but your next words nearly sent him over the edge.

"Choke me, Kiszka." 

His hand squeezed around your throat and you gasped at the feeling, a smile playing across your lips. You looked ahead at the field and you bit your lip almost hard enough to break the skin

Being choked was one of your favorite things but nobody could ever seem to do it right or they were just too scared to hurt you. You liked the pain and you didn't mind if you even had bruises, in the end, it was just a nice reminder of the time you had.

It was almost like he was reading your thoughts as you felt a hard smack across your ass, sending out another loud moan. Josh reached his free hand down and began rubbing fast circles on your clit. Tears brimmed your eyes from the feelings being so overwhelming. You were in a complete state of euphoria and if you could, you'd have this moment last a lifetime. 

Josh pulled your back against his chest and you brought your head back against his shoulder and tried your hardest to look at him. Your vision was slowly going in and out from him choking you, but somehow it was just even more arousing. His hand released from around your throat and you gasped for air, the stars that were clouding your vision starting to disappear.

"Such a good girl, " Josh groaned as he slowed his pace, trying to elongate the moment in any way that he could. His thrusts were still sharp and it was nearly perfect with every spot he was hitting.

"Oh my god." You gasped. As the familiar feeling of your climax started to bubble in your stomach, you could feel yourself tightening around him.

"Fuck, if you don't stop clenching around me I won't last much longer," Josh groaned as he threw his head back.

"Shit, please let me cum, Josh, please! I'm so close," You begged. Josh's movements sped up as you pleaded.

"Cum for me, darling," He whispered in your ear and that was all you needed before you exploded around him. You cried out his name as he kept moving quick circles on your clit, riding you through your orgasm.

"Fuck, I'm going to cum," Josh groaned and you could feel his thrusts getting sloppier.

"I want to taste you," You whined as you finally came to. You felt Josh pull out of you and you stood up before dropping to your knees. He was much bigger than you were anticipating. Your lips wrapped around his slick head and teased him before slowly sinking down on his length, your tongue running along the underside of him. You used your hand for the rest that you couldn't fit into your mouth and started to pick up your pace.

"Look at you and those pretty little lips around my cock," Josh hissed and his dirty words made you moan. You could feel him twitch and you just knew he was going to cum soon. You quickened your pace and played with his balls with your free hand, causing a loud moan to escape from him. You took his length as far back into your throat as you could which released an a loud groan from him. You looked up at him with innocent eyes which only seemed to weaken him.

"Shit, Y/N, I'm-," Josh groaned again and you felt his length twitch inside your mouth as the warm, salty liquid shot down the back of your throat. You continued to suck him off, trying to get every last little bit of him that you could. 

You pulled him out of your mouth with a 'pop' and licked a slow, teasing stripe against his length before standing to your feet. You grabbed onto Josh's arms since you were unsteady and he let out a small laugh.  Your dress fell back down hitting the middle of your thighs and Josh pulled up his boxers and jeans, adjusting himself. His hands came up and cupped themselves against both sides of your face before he placed a slow, passionate kiss against your lips. His tongue intertwined with yours slowly and you melted into his gentle touch.

"Let's get you home and cleaned up, yeah? Do you wanna come back to mine?" He whispered as he barely pulled away from you, noses touching.

"Only if I can get more of you," You whispered back, tangling your fingers in his hair at the nape of his neck and tugging back slightly to expose more of his neck before you started planting a mark on his jaw just below his ear. He let out a shaky breath and his hands gripped around your ass.

"Ready for round two already?" He smirked, letting you leave a mark on him. It was only fair since he left multiple on you.

"After that? I'll never get enough of you." You whispered in his ear before turning away to grab all of the belongings that you left a little way down the beach. Josh wasn't far behind you as he grabbed the blankets and shook off all of the sand before folding them up. You walked back to the car and he was quick to open the door for you before he got in himself. He put the keys in the ignition and his car purred to life. Before he started to pull away he leaned over a placed a firm kiss against your lips.

"How about we go back and I fuck you properly this time?" He whispered in your ear before tugging on your earlobe with his teeth. You faced him as a wicked grin flashed across his face and his eyes filled with lust. You bit your lip and nodded your head, leaving you at a loss for words.

After tonight, you were going to be absolutely wrecked. 

***

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#Josh Kiszka #Josh Kiszka GVF #Josh Kiszka Greta Van Fleet #JoshKiszka #Josh Kiszka Oneshot #Josh Kiszka one shot #Josh Kiszka fanfic #Josh Kiszka Fan fic #Josh Kiszka Fan Fiction #Josh Kiszka Smut #GVF #Greta van fleet #gvf fanfic #gvf fan fic #gvf fanfiction #gvf fan fiction #gvf smut #gvf one shot #gvf oneshot #greta van fleet fanfic #greta van fleet oneshot #greta van fleet fan fic #greta van fleet one shot #greta van fleet fan fiction #greta van fleet fanfiction #greta van fleet smut #gvf josh #gvf josh kiszka #greta van fleet josh #greta van fleet josh kiszka

[nekoannie-chan]

Sadness memories of a summer part II

Pairing: Steve Rogers X Rumlow!Reader.

Word count: 1135 words. 

Summary: On Y/N's birthday, all are memories.

Warnings: Angst. 

A/N: In this fic Rumlow isn’t HYDRA, neither Reader, so both are Avengers, Civil War never happened but the Snap happened.

Second part of @firefly-in-darkness​‘s Firefly’s Summer Challenge.

You can read part I here.

@the-slumberparty​  Week 2

@saiyanprincessswanie​

My native language is Spanish so I wanna improve my writing skills in English if you notice any mistakes, please let me know and I will correct them.

I don’t give any kind of permission that my fics to be posted on other platforms or languages (I translate myself my work) or the use of my graphics (my dividers are included in this), I did them exclusively for my fics, please respect my work and don't steal it. There are some people here who make dividers that anyone can use, mine is not this type, please look for the other's people. The only exception is the ones I gifted 'cuz now belong to someone else. If you find any of my works on a different platform and are not one of my accounts, please let me know. Reblogs and comments are always welcome.

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Marvel's characters (unfortunately), except for the original characters and the story.

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2023

 Hope was blooming in Brock; at last, he could get his sister back. On the other hand, Steve was nervous; soon he would be able to see his beloved again. It wasn't going to be easy, but you were willing to pay any price to get you back.

2015

 "Come on, Steve, walk faster," you said, pulling his arm a little so he would hurry up.

"Wait..." he asked; it was supposed to be a special day.

"Mm, I forgot you're an old man," you said a little disappointed, stopping.

"Hey! "

You smiled, you took a part of the skirt of your red dress, Steve loved you wearing that dress, you started to run, taking him by surprise and he ran after you, without stopping you kept going up the hill, although it wasn't exaggeratedly high, you knew the place very well, since your childhood you visited it, you stopped when you reached the top.

"Finally, we arrived; this is my favorite place; the sunsets are beautiful," you commented when you noticed that Steve had already caught up with you.

"No, I don't think so."

"You haven't even seen it." You turned around a little bit annoyed, you were sure he had never been there.

"I know because you are the most beautiful woman in the world," he answered, hugging you, "will you marry me?" He whispered in your ear while he took out the little box with the engagement ring.

2023

 Every morning for the next few weeks, Steve kept looking at the calendar, counting the days until he would see her again; besides, a part of him kept remembering what had happened the summer before the Snap, since that was when you got engaged; the wedding would have been years earlier if what had happened hadn't happened.

Sometimes he laughed as he remembered the day he proposed, never before had he been so scared as when Brock found out about the engagement, not even when you put the serum in him did he feel such fear, for a moment he thought his brother-in-law would murder him (he probably wanted to, but he probably held back for you), he didn't even remember what Brock had said to him "threatened", however, Steve seemed to have heard something to do with his head and shield if he didn't make you happy or if he ever hurt you.

He swallowed hard as a specific question popped into his head, what was he going to tell him when you asked him about what had happened, he had been five years without you, and although he still had a little time to think about it, he hoped you still wanted to stay married to him.

Steve had the wedding rings in his hands, and on the day of the ceremony, you had forgotten to put yours on because you had to leave in a hurry. He also couldn't forget the feeling the first day he came back and you weren't there.

The house had never been so silent and sad, nothing was the same without you, the first night he cried. You both knew there was always a risk of something going wrong on a mission or even...even losing the other.

However, at least Steve never came to believe that it could really happen; he was always trying to protect you, and he still felt guilty that he couldn't have done something to stop you from disappearing.

Steve felt nervous; his heart was beating very fast. After so long, he was going to see you; everything had to go well, although it seemed a little strange to him that everything was so easy.

But he forgot it as soon as he saw you. He ran towards you and hugged you so tightly that you had to stop him to prevent him from continuing to squeeze you.

"What happened? I don't remember getting to...

Unexpectedly, you were separated, and the battle was just beginning.

After you defeated Thanos, you ran to Steve and began to check his wounds. You didn't seem so serious thanks to the serum, however, and you began to have several questions, mainly about what year you were; you noticed Steve was a little different from how you remembered him, and Brock also looked older.

As you told them what happened, the more questions you had, but you didn't dare to ask them, maybe when Steve and you were alone you would ask them.

"He has a lot to talk about; he left them alone," Brock said, leaving the room.

"Where did you go?" Where were you all this time? Steve asked.

"Darkness," you answered.

"Darkness? "

"I felt warmth and tingling in my limbs, and then everything went dark; then you were there, so I don't know what happened," you continued.

Steve relaxed; at least you didn't seem to have suffered or been in danger but rather to be in some sort of limbo, perhaps unconscious.

"I guess you must have a lot of questions," Steve commented.

"I...well.... "

"Ask them; I know you didn't want to ask them in front of your brother, but we're alone."

"You say you went to the past, and, well, well...

"You don't have to worry, the only thing I was interested in was to somehow or other get the stones to bring you back, that's all I cared about "Steve answered, he knew what your question was.

"Steve, what did you do all this time?" Is there someone else? You felt a lump in your throat as you finished the last question. You could understand if there was someone else; after all, five years had passed and you didn't know if you would ever be able to fix what happened.

"We looked for a way to fix everything that happened, I should have done something else to avoid it, to not... lose you, we looked for many ways until finally, unexpectedly Scott came up with the solution...

"Scott? How? "

"He didn't disappear, but he got trapped in a... well, I didn't quite understand what he explained to us, but, well, it worked.” And as for your other question, there could never be anyone else; it's always been you," he continued, taking your hand.

You smiled; you couldn't believe that he had waited for you all that time, even if you had done the same. Now you knew that not even death was going to separate you.

"What are we going to do now?" We have to make up for all the time we couldn't be together.

"What do you think about going on a second honeymoon? I don't think they'll need us around here for a while," Steve proposed.

"We have a lot of time to make up," you replied, kissing him.

#Firefly’s Summer Challenge #navy and roo’s sleepover #summerbreakchallange #summerbreakwritingchallange #steve rogers x rumlow reader

[polyamorouspunk]

I just figured out I'm polyam, and I'm moving out of my hometown to a very queer city (one of the queerest in the world). I'm scared that even there I'll have trouble making friends and finding people as a non-binary, bisexual, polyam person (especially one that leans alternative). Do you have any advice for being your authentic self while still grappling with a lot of internalised stuff and moving to a new place?

Hmm. When I moved to a new place I found comfort in being able to dress more as a girl even though I’m afab. I felt like people in my hometown had put me in a box (“I bet you hated wearing a dress!”) and I felt like I was having trouble breaking out of that box. I’m able to dress more femme comfortably now. As for other genders, I don’t really consider myself in or out of the closet. I’m just someone who doesn’t enforce my pronouns or gender because I just don’t care enough about it/to make a fuss about it. I have pronoun pins I don’t really wear. If there was a day I was feeling really adverse to being gendered as my agab then I guess I would wear them but right now I present so femme that there’s no real point to it for me because I just don’t feel masc. And I’m just never out as plural. I just use genderfluid instead, which is more accurate right now anyway. Not that anyone really. Asks.

Working at Michaels Craft Store I’ve found other queer people who are out and have pronouns on their name tags and stuff. They are properly gendered by other staff. I’m not saying make friends with your local craft store employees but like yk it’s a start. Ask them if there’s any cool queer places if they look openly queer or something.

In college I’ve found openly queer people but college acquaintances haven’t lasted for me. There’s no point in really talking to someone once your not in a class with them anymore. The exception has been @princess-pathetic-112898 and I love her so so much and I had the pleasure of dating her for a bit and it was wonderful and she was such a blessing. When I was feeling so alone in the world she was there for me, and I’ve been praying for someone like her ever since but let’s be honest she’s a once-in-a-lifetime friend. I haven’t met anyone like her since.

As for polyam people, and scenes, I would check Facebook! Someone on here (I think it was Key but if I’m misassigning credit I’m sorry) said to check Facebook and that’s where I found the local punk venue in my city last week after finally looking. Honestly as “Punk” I don’t really look like… “myself”, so I’m not going to go until “Punk” feels comfortable going as himself, though we’ve been so solid I haven’t heard from him really in months. But I won’t be going right now until I can comfortably pass as transmasc for myself. I have other plans for the body right now I want to focus on and I don’t mind putting that on the back burner, which it feels like some people don’t really understand.

There’s a wonderful pagan store I go to that I hung out at the other day, and they decorated for pride, but there weren’t any other shoppers in there but I hung out with the cashier for almost an hour. She was cool, in her late 30s early 40s, and she told me about a summer harvest festival they’re hosting and suggested I come to try and meet some people there. I go to a lot of Pride events and I’ve followed some people on Instagram from them in the past but I haven’t made any friends.

Truth is: I’m really lonely. All of my friends are back home. I miss them. My mom has asked if I want to move back but other than being lonely my mental health is SO much better here. But I haven’t been able to make friends since moving here and it sucks. I feel like I’m doing everything I’m supposed to be to make friends (getting a job with other college kids, going to college, becoming a regular at a local store, going to events and concerts, etc.) and nothing is working and it’s extremely disappointing. I feel like I should be doing more but that really pushes my physical limits. People seem surprised I’m not out ever Friday night at the punk scene thrashing around and I feel like I have to explain I live in rural North Carolina 40 minutes away from the city, and if I’m not already working it’s a haul to go there, and if I am already working I’m tired and depending on how many hours I’m working in a week I’m already pushing my physical limits just to make ends meet at home. At this point it’s looking like I’m going to need physical therapy. I’m not sure I want to head to a punk show after work OR drive 40 minutes just to go to one on a Friday night when I have a day off.

I think that moving to a new place can really help you overcome some internal things. I was able to break out of a box I felt like I had put myself in/been put in and start experimenting with my style and fashion. I moved where I know people and while I’m out as bisexual and polyam I just haven’t bothered to broach the gender subject because I’m not ready and it doesn’t bother me enough to push me to say something other than a comment here and there. The idea of being “out” is overrated to me anyway. I’m just me.

Making friends used to be so easy for me but I guess that’s what happens when you’re someone years spending time with people 5/7 days of the week. Now that I only see people a few times a week it’s a lot harder, and even though other people I know have made friends with college companions and coworkers I have not. I wish I had better advice and I’m wishing you better luck than I’ve been having.

#punk gets mail #the punk gives no advice #personal #long post

[sugarplanet]

"Did I Draw That?" Critiquing Your Old Art and Tracking Your Growth

You’ve probably had that feeling before where nothing you’re drawing is quite up to snuff or you can’t seem to make anything you’re particularly proud of. Art blocks and creative ruts are a plague to most artists and sometimes it feels like you’ll be sick with them forever. As someone who can find it hard to draw or post when I’ve lost any sense of motivation because “my art isn’t good enough, I don’t have any followers,” I’ve made myself work harder on redirecting towards more productive means of self-critique and analysis to keep me from self-destructing over my craft. One way I go about self-analysis or finding inspiration again is by comparing myself to myself instead of to artists that are years ahead or behind me so I can see how I’ve been taking to the efforts I’ve made to improve while, where I want to improve more, and get reacquainted with my art in a more personal sense instead of looking at numbers of likes or views on post next to other people’s art.

I found an exercise I did back in 2021 where I was practicing some lighting and paint stoke techniques free hand, really experimenting with the most innocuous thing I could think of at the time; a lady holding a cat. I did the first piece on a whim, making things a little flat, and then actively revisited the piece a couple months later with some sharper brushes, a more expressive subject, and greater contrast in color and value. I even added a simple background to make things a little more interesting. I did like some things in both pieces (the color palate and understated texture I got in the first piece and the greater energy in the later piece) but I know there was plenty of room for improvement (mainly the anatomy and the blobbiness of the cats). Looking at the pieces, I tried to find the mindset I had when I worked on them and think about my approach; as flawed as they were, I liked them a little still and wanted to try one more time to see if I could make something out of it.

This piece feels more disciplined than the others with a background and stronger anatomy but does employ some of the spirit of the first two in the painterly approach.

It’s nice being able to look fondly back on your own art, but it can be a little worrying at times liking your old art while also combating feelings of dissatisfaction with your current output. There’s a belief that one mark of improvement is being able to look back on your own work and reflexively gag over how wonky the quality is. With that logic, you liking your old work at all must mean that you either haven’t improved at all or you can’t see how you’ve improved. To counteract that kind of downward spiral-inducing line of thought, understand that part of becoming a better (and happier) artist is being able to see your skill and improvement while also being able to spot your shortcomings and improving them without fixating them. I wasn’t always able to look at my own art objectively and redo an older concept or update a piece so easily but understanding the value in all of your work, even the super dated and wonky stuff, does a service to your craft (not to mention your self-esteem.)

If you feel like your work isn’t up to snuff or if the dredges of stagnation are biting at your toes, try sifting through your portfolio or sketches or psd files of over stuffed canvases with hundreds of layers (I’m not the only one that does that, right?) and see what you’ve found since before you first discovered that new brush set or around a time when you were last energetic in your work or even something from this time last year. It’s best to see if you have any files separate from social media like twitter or instagrams so you aren’t judging your work based on arbitrary popularity or clickability; look at it without bias and be fair to yourself. Is there something you found that you liked or really don’t like at all anymore? Could you see how to improve on it if you’re sure you can do better? I’d suggest a character design or portrait that you like in a way but can instantly think up a few ideas on how to make it a lot better. All the progress you’ve made is going to shine through each new detail and correction; you’ll take good care to treat something so important well!

#journal #my art #self help #self improvement #redraw #art critique #cats #cat portrairs #digital art #clip studio paint #art tips #brblog

[swluminekin]

To the one theorist who bounces theories with me:

Thank you.

Do you know that I haven’t theorized properly in at least years almost 4 at this point? We have a mutual friend - you know who I mean - and they can tell you that a lot of the time I’m still scared. They can tell you my story - I think they already have - but it would be better if it came from me.

There was a time a few years back - the “before times” if you will of the world as we know it now. The ego fires didn’t go out because we were always getting new information, new tastes, new hints. It was early days of the official community server, run by the gladiator himself. The theories channel was always busy but it got to a point where things died down a little. Basically people started pulling at straws to figure things out. I had seen one person mention something, and I tried to voice my own thoughts, agreeing with them. Immediately, I was shut down and told that I was wrong. Didn’t really give a good reason as to why, just shut me down completely.

Not too long after that, in a completely different community in a completely different place, I put out another theory. Once again, I was near immediately shut down, told I was wrong. They at least had some sort of explanation, but for the most part they just shut me down and told me I was wrong.

I was hurt, lost. I felt that if I theorized anything, thought anything, I would be hated, told I was wrong, be berated and yelled at. Just for thinking, for theorizing, for having fun. In my mind, if I couldn’t theorize, then I couldn’t create. If I couldn’t create, that meant I couldn’t do any form of art, which included stories and any sort of drawing.

For months I was hurting, the only person I could turn to being our friend. When I tried to do anything creative or theorist wise, I would always hesitate or stop entirely. It caused me physical pain to even try. There were even times when I would cry because I wanted to return to theorizing, to creating so bad, but I felt that I couldn’t. They listened to me cry and comforted me because I wanted to return to that but was afraid to.

Eventually I found I could draw again. But when I drew, the art felt hollow - at least it did to me. I was excited that I could do art again but it just... never felt right. Even when did “draw this in your own style” stuff, it didn’t feel right.

I don’t even remember what happened, what video caused it, but one day I finally wrote a theory. Specifically, it was the Convergence theory. But I was so scared about what I was talking about and that I would be shut down again that I felt like I had to show my proof, show that I knew what I was talking about. I pointed out specific videos and discussions and Instagram posts. Heck, I even put up the pictures of the discord channel as well as my proof as to the channel’s naming.

Because I was scared.

After I wrote that theory, I was tired. I was so worn down. It was all because I felt like I had to prove myself. Like I had to show the world that I had something solid to back me up. Our friend could tell you that while I was proud of myself, I was exhausted and had one hell of a headache. (To be completely honest, I’m surprised at how well the Convergence theory is still holding up three years later with the I.R.I.S. lore? Like what?)

Ever since, I’ve rarely done theories - maybe having done a couple here and there, but not many. If I theorize, I’ve almost never written them down, I’ve just said them out loud. But I’m able to draw again, and I can write stories again. But I’ve never been able to really feel proud of myself, feel completely happy with anything I’ve done. All because of that fear of failure as an artist, creator, and theorist.

Then you came around. You looked at my theories. You were willing to bounce off of me. Counter me with “... but this... and because of...” rather than just “No and I won’t say why.” You’ve helped me with relearning and accepting my theorist side. The fact that we can bounce theories off of each other has helped me to think about things again. Our friend can tell you this. I still don’t theorize like I used to, but to know that I’ve actually somewhat met people who understand what I’m talking about, who accept me and my theories and thoughts? It helps to ease the process and the want to write them down again.

So I say to you again, thank you.

Your mutual theorist,

“Scarlet”

#from theorist to theorist #letter to a theorist #letter from a theorist #honestly grateful #glad to know you're around #welcomed into part of the theorist community again #quiet but listening #creative theorist #theories help creativity #artistic theorist #theories help art #once was lost but refound my path #theories never felt the same #hurt by the theorist community #healed by the theorist community #this theorist should know who they are #I'd be surprised if they don't

[saucymalum]

How Cliche pt.5

Luke Hemmings x fem!reader pt.1, pt.2, pt.3, pt.4

Summary: When Y/Ns sisters wedding was announced they thought they could find a date. But when the weddings a week away with no date they are forced to ask their best friend, Luke, to be their fake boyfriend for the wedding.

Originally posted on my Instagram

Word Count: 716

-----

The plane makes an almost smooth landing and I lead Luke quickly out of the airport. I'm enjoying being able to stretch my legs after so long. Crossing the threshold I pull out my phone to call my mom. Just as I'm searching for her contact I'm distracted by a car horn. I look up to see my mother jumping out of her car and running to me her arms wide open.

She engulfs me in a bear hug. “Oh sweetie, it’s so great to see you again!"

I squeeze her tighter, I didn't realize how much I missed her until now. A year is a damn long time. She pulls away and her eyes immediately look at the blonde giraffe next to me aka Luke.

"Oh gosh, you must be Luke! My, you're tall! I've been waiting to meet you for ages." She says as she pulls him into a hug. 

He shoots a smile my way when he hugs her back, "Ages huh? Well, it's a shame we couldn't meet sooner."

They pull away and my mom is pulling us to the car quickly. I'm shoved to the back as she tells Luke to sit up front. 

"So Luke, YN tells me you're in a band? How's that going?" The subtlety is almost non-existent with this one.

"It's going amazing, we've been a band for almost 10 years now."

"Oh yeah? What's your favorite part?"

"Definitely meeting our fans, they're so amazing and passionate. I wish I could thank them all individually." He looks at her with such a bright smile I can almost feel myself getting lost.

"What's your band's name again?" She asks leaning to the side to hear him better while keeping her eyes glued to the road.

"5 seconds of summer. It's a really weird name, honestly, I still have no clue what it means"

My mom giggles and It's like I'm dreaming. I'm completely shocked. No boyfriend I've ever had has been able to make my mom's ice walls melt so quickly. Most would be happy, say he's obviously a keeper, my chest just feels empty and my heart’s in my throat. What's going to happen when I tell her we broke up? We aren't technically even dating.

I sit in silence the rest of the drive to the hotel zoning out of the conversation in the front of the car. Im broke out of my thoughts by my door being opened. Luke looks at me concerned and leans in close.

"You ok? We're almost at our room."

"Yeah, I was just thinking." I step out of the car and grab my suitcase from the trunk. Seeing Luke and my mom laughing made me simultaneously ecstatic and extremely sad. Luke walks up to me and laces our fingers together. Memories flood into my head and my heart sinks deeper. I walk alongside Luke silently focusing only on the Hotel door trying to get there as soon as I can. The sooner I get into the room the sooner I can hide in the bathroom and calm down from this flood of unwelcome emotion. 

I quickly check in telling my mom I’m tired and we can talk tomorrow and rush to my room. I sit on the bed taking a deep breath and bury my face in my hands. The room door unlocks and a head of blond hair walks through. Luke places his bag next to mine and walks over to me. 

“We have the same room huh?” I laugh bitterly.

His eyebrows knit together, “I mean its not like we haven’t shared a bed before. Do you suddenly not want to be around me or something? What did I do wrong?” 

“You did nothing wrong, Luke. I’m just very overwhelmed right now.”

He nods and sits next to me. We sit next to each other in silence unbeknownst to him his presence is only making my confusion worse. Do I still have feelings for him or am I just going insane? Do I just need some sleep? Will that save me from spirally?

I sigh and look up at Luke only to find him already looking at me. I look into his crystal eyes and give him a weak smile. What the hell have I got myself into?

Next

#luke hemmings x reader #luke hemmings x y/n #luke hemmings x you #luke hemmings #luke hemming imagines #5sos fanfic #5sos fic

[leaahhh]

some late august fixations

julia jacklin’s PRE PLEASURE

three standouts (though the entire album is gutting and wonderful):

be careful with yourself “please stop smoking, want your life to last a long time if you don't stop smoking, i’ll have to start, shorten mine”

ignore tenderness far too soon for me to say anything of substance about this

this instagram post

caroline polachek’s PANG

not new, but i consider this an all time great record. i went to lollapalooza in chicago for work at the end of july, where i was tasked with tending to a freshly broken heart while stomping around the 90-degree fairgrounds with puffy eyes and a (nearly comical) job to do. i was surrounded at every second by swarms of sticky teens and thumping bass. it was a five-day dizzy spell.

at the end of the first night of the fest i finished the last set i needed to cover and realized i’d be able to catch caroline polachek’s. she was playing at a stage that sat in something like a forest clearing. i ran over (i haven’t run in, like, years) in the dark, afraid to fall but hoping my own momentum would keep me on my feet, thick warm air hitting my face, while the title track played in the distance. it was the first time i smiled that week.

since then, the album’s re-entered my daily rotation, keeping me company while cooking meals or taking my infamous miles-long aimless walks. i’ve found that a whole new batch of songs are sitting with me now than the ones i claimed were my favorites in 2019 – namely “look at me now” and “go as a dream”:

mimi zhu’s BE NOT AFRAID OF LOVE

celeste and i waited in a line that wrapped around the block in LES for mimi’s zhu’s book launch/reading last tuesday evening. as the sky darkened and fat rain pellets began to fall, we inched our way to the door and happened to be the last two people let into the venue before the event hit capacity. (afterward, while walking to get tea, celeste said she had a feeling that was going to happen but didn’t want to say anything, i agreed and said it felt like a direct you need this message from something up above.) 

the room was packed so i couldn’t actually even see the reading from where we stood on the stairs by the door, but that helped me listen more closely, ruminating on every word, closing my eyes at certain points to really let them ring. since then, C and i have been rapid-fire texting each other after we finish each chapter, a little informal book club of our own. it’s a a stunning, powerful and painful read that i would recommend to anyone.

i’ve been alternating between this book and…

joanna walsh’s BREAK.UP

i find myself trying to cover up the front cover of this book whenever i take it out in public, turning it upside down on cafe tables and bending it in half when i pull it out on the subway. i know no one is looking, but for some reason i feel embarrassed to be carrying around something that blatantly clues everyone who looks my direction in to what i might be “going through.” that’s besides the point, though.

“break.up” is one of the more gripping pieces of writing i’ve picked up in a while. it’s described as a “novel in essays that locates a ‘romance’ within the mesh of electronic communication.” it’s a great companion to have as i – a very Online person…whether by choice or by trade, who’s to say – grapple with thoughts about visibility, contact, boundaries. how can one truly experience separation in the digital age? is there a universe in which even the most basic modes of documentation aren’t, in some way, white-knuckled, likely futile attempts at communication and connection?

are you reading this right now?

early in the book, walsh writes, “i have moved. i am at liberty. see me (don’t see me). but i exist. still.”

it reminds me of that line in that florence song, south london forever: “everything i ever did was just another way to scream your name.”

[beananacake]

Oh my absolute goodness! That chapter of TAP was amazing. It was so heart wrenching yet so very very beautiful and sweet. Your work always blows me away love.

I didn’t tell you this, but on my Instagram account I do a think called faithie’s fic corner where I share all my absolute favorite and yours was this weeks fic. My friend said she could see the love I have for your work on my face. That I couldn’t wipe the smile off my face and I looked almost in love, which isn’t wrong at all.

I adore TAP and Snap Shot so much that I can’t even put it into words. I haven’t been able to read your Ikaris one yet, but as soon as I do I’m sure I’ll fall head over heels in love with it as well. I’m sure I’ll want to added it to my reblog page immediately after the first chapter like I did this one.

Like today I was reading the TAP chapter while at my sisters house and she looked over at me. She flat out said “why are you grinning so big at your phone 🤨” and I was like “you just wouldn’t understand! Unless you read this it’s so amazing! 😩” and she just goes “I don’t read fan fiction… I read real books…” and I said “Well it’s your lose then…”

It’s safe to say you have reawakened something in me for writing. Before I found your page my writing was slowly just becoming lackluster, but now… I have a new passion for it and I’m not quite sure how you did it, but thank you.

It’s definitely definitely safe to say your my one of my top five inspiration pages. Like you have no idea how much I appreciate good stories like yours. So much detail, but not to much detail. You have like an amazing writing style and I love it so much.

Like I just wanna send you all my requests from now on because I think you’d knock them out of the park every time. I’m not naming names or anything, but I sent some to someone else who writes for Richard and it wasn’t nearly as good as anything I’ve seen form you.

Anyway I’ll stop blubbering now, but I just wanted you to know that you 1. Inspire me so much and 2. When ever you need someone to throw ideas at or just need someone to give an option on something I’m here for you whenever just message me. Also I wish so badly I could put into words just how much I love this, but I don’t think I ever could.

It’s heart wrenching, but mysterious and simply just so very sweet at certain points. I just can’t get over it. I’ll willingly praise your work anytime you need pick me ups because your work just has a certain  je ne sais quoi about it, but I can’t put my finger on exactly why.

Love Faithie 💙🧡

My dear, dear Faithie,

First, I'm at a loss that someone with take the time out of their day to say something like this! I don't think I deserve words like this because I don't see myself as talented or as amazing as you put me to be. No, it's not humility speaking (heaven knows I'm not that humble) but it's more of disbelief that someone would actually like what I put out. I think I'm mediocre at most, striving to be different and original in a place where originality thrives. But thank you so much for thinking me different with the other people and liking what it is that I put out. It means the world to me! <3

Fanfiction gets a lot of flak for existing. A lot of literary snobs would turn their noses up to fanfiction and fanfic writers, but they fail to realize that a lot of the known classics are also fanfic. Take, for example, Dante's Divine Comedy. It's a self-insert of the Bible and when pointed out, it stumps a lot of people, with most denying that fact. Fanfic is not inherently bad; people just find not so good fanfics and deem the rest equally not as good. So, let your sister be if she thinks fanfic is below her to read. It would be her loss because there are a lot of "unpublished" works that are greater than published books.

As for being an inspiration, I'm surprised I've become that but I am very flattered to think of me as such. I literally have no idea how I've done it but I hope I continue to inspire you. Keep writing, luv, because one only gets better with practice, no one gets worse at it. If you need any help or any advice or just another pair of eyes to see what you've made, just drop me a message.

Thank you, thank you, Faithie. You are a superstar!

#faithiegirl01 asks #beananacake writes #ask answered