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demifiendrsa · 3 years

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Gege Akutami x Tite Kubo special talk that was featured in Jujutsu Kaisen Official Fan Book.

This exclusive interview was arranged at the ardent request of Gege Akutami, who was motivated by Tite Kubo’s works. We are pleased to present this hefty 10-page transcript of their first long, heated discussion about manga.

Gege Akutami

Born in 1992 in Iwate Prefecture. Debuted in 2014 with the one-shot Kamishiro Sosa. His current series Jujutsu Kaisen has been serialized in Weekly Shonen Jump since 2018.

Tite Kubo

Born in 1977 in Hiroshima Prefecture. His previous series Bleach, which started in 2001, was a massive hit that received universal acclaim and numerous multimedia adaptations. His current series Burn the Witch began serialization in 2020.

Learning About “Mangaka” by Reading Bleach in Fourth Grade

Is this your first time talking to each other?

Akutami: This is our first proper conversation, though we did greet each other once at a Jump Exhibition.

Kubo: Briefly. Back then you told me, “I started a new manga that’s inspired by Bleach,” and I replied, “Don’t you mean ‘by Togashi-san’?” [laughs] (TN: Yoshihiro Togashi is the creator of YuYu Hakusho and Hunter x Hunter.)

Akutami: I was too wound up at the time to say this, but Bleach was actually what introduced me to the concept of “mangaka” (manga artists).

Kubo: Oh really?

Akutami: When I was in fourth grade, my older brother would always buy Weekly Shonen Jump. However, he never let me read the issues he bought since he was very possessive of his belongings. One day when he wasn’t around, I secretly opened an issue and it happened to be the one Bleach debuted in. That first chapter was so impressive, it made me realize just how incredible mangaka are. I’ve been hooked ever since.

Kubo: Did you start following Bleach on a weekly basis after that?

Akutami: Nope… I could only manage to sneak a peek whenever my brother was gone…

Kubo: You had to read in secret every time? [laughs]

Akutami: Yup. [laughs] And soon enough, something happened that pushed me to become a mangaka myself. When I was in fifth grade, we moved from Iwate Prefecture to Sendai in Miyagi Prefecture. I was surprised to find out that one of the friends I made at my new school drew manga-style art. I was blown away, like, “Are you telling me art isn’t just fun to look at, it’s fun to draw too?”

Kubo: Wait, did you not love drawing as a kid?

Akutami: I didn’t draw anything outside of school assignments, and frankly, I couldn’t care less about it. I neither loved it nor hated it.

Kubo: Yet you grew up to be a mangaka, huh.

Akutami: I-I guess… Anyway, I started to mimic my friend by drawing my own manga, and that’s how my dream of being a professional mangaka was born.

Kubo: Amusingly, I was the exact opposite. When I was in second or third grade, I loved the GeGeGe no Kitaro anime. Then I became an avid reader of the GeGeGe no Kitaro manga, which influenced me to draw nothing but pointillist art—I even added dotted shadows to yokai sketches. The whole reason I got into drawing was to become a mangaka.

Akutami: Whoa… Sounds like you had it all figured out…

The Whereabouts of Kumo no Kyojin

In a bonus chapter of Jujutsu Kaisen, Akutami-sensei made a bombshell reveal—he wrote and compiled a Bleach-inspired poem anthology called Kumo no Kyojin (The Cloud Giant) in middle school.

Kubo: This I gotta see.

Akutami: I was young… I’m sorry!

Kubo: Did you bring it with you today?

Akutami: Well, the truth is I don’t have it anymore. And the scariest part is… I have no idea who does.

Kubo: Nooo!! [laughs]

Akutami: Poems aside, there were also a bunch of sketches in that notebook. I ended up giving it to one of my juniors who wanted it. Back then, I didn’t have the crisis management skills to recognize it could be used as blackmail, so I handed it over without a second thought…

Kubo: That sucks!! Do you have their contact info?

Akutami: I do not. I hope they threw it out for recycling…

Digital with an Intentionally Analog Touch

Kubo: Akutami-sensei, what kind of digital pens do you use? I recently made the switch to digital. My goal is to make digital art with an analog flair, but I’m not sure how to achieve that.

Akutami: Did you go full digital?

Kubo: At least for coloring.

Akutami: I’m no expert at digital art either. I can’t even create my own custom brushes…

Kubo: Uh, neither can I!

Akutami: I just give every feature a whirl, and stick with whatever’s most convenient for me.

Kubo: Same here. Though I have to say, your designs have a very analog texture to them. I asked if you’re a traditional artist during our introductions earlier, and was shocked to learn that you draw digitally.

Akutami: I intentionally draw with an analog touch, so I’m happy to hear that from you!

Kubo: In that case, do you deliberately roughen up your art too?

Akutami: That part’s not deliberate… I draw as carefully as I can, but I guess it just doesn’t come out right.

Kubo: Got it! I thought you were purposely going for that style.

Akutami: No matter how much effort I put in, it doesn’t seem to come across in my designs…

Kubo: It’s still amazing how analog your art looks despite being digital. Have you ever drawn manga the old fashioned way?

Akutami: All the one-shots prior to my first serialization were drawn traditionally. However, I switched to digital once I realized I’d never qualify for a weekly series unless my art improved. I genuinely wanted to keep drawing on paper, but I was so stressed out from not being able to control a G-pen that I abandoned my existing manuscripts and worked only on new storyboards for a while.

Kubo: Yeah, G-pens are a pain to use!

Akutami: I was like, “Seriously?! Do people seriously enjoy using this thing?!” Since it was taking me forever to master the G-pen, I figured I definitely had room for improvement! [laughs]

Kubo: Some of the art I see in Jump makes me go, “Were these lines really drawn with a G-pen?” They’re extremely tricky. I once ditched them in favor of markers, so I would know.

Akutami: My thoughts exactly. In the past, I also heard that a decent amount of people draw with fineliner pens. But when I tried them for myself, I drew the most un-Jump-worthy art I had ever seen, so I gave up.

Series Oozing with the Creator’s Personality

Akutami-sensei, what’s your impression of Kubo-sensei?

Akutami: His series and designs always struck me as stylish—and when I met him for the first time, I got the impression that he himself was equally stylish. I was astonished that a mangaka could have so much in common with their series.

Kubo: Hahaha. [laughs] From looking at your series, I assumed you’d have an evil personality. I mean, don’t you get a sense of an author’s disposition or temperament by reading their work?

Akutami: [cackles]

Kubo: But our interactions today made me go, “Huh? He’s behaving nicely.” [laughs] It’s almost terrifying to see the person behind a manga such as that acting in a manner such as this.

Everyone: [bursts into laughter]

Akutami: It’s precisely because I’m a mangaka that I try to behave myself. You see, my generation has a rather negative perception of a mangaka’s occupation. [laughs] So I want others to view me as a respectable adult.

Kubo: In other words, you want to set a good example. [laughs] I notice you’ve been using “watashi” (gender neutral, formal) as your first-person pronoun this entire time—what sort of image are you trying to project?

Akutami: Back when I attended an all-boys middle school and high school, I tended to use “ore” (masculine, casual). (TN: “Ore” is Kubo’s pronoun of choice.)

Kubo: ‘Cause you’d get teased if you used “boku” (masculine, formal)?

Akutami: Exactly. Later on, when I got more opportunities to speak with superiors in college, I switched to “boku.” Then before my series went weekly, I decided to act more respectably and defaulted to “watashi.”

Kubo: Do you use “watashi” even when chatting among friends?

Akutami: Basically. Sometimes I let an “ore” slip if I’m in a good mood.

Kubo: Fascinating… Although you’re certainly careful with your words, I still feel a darkness emanating from your series. [laughs]

The Ins and Outs of Characters: Hidden Lessons From Bleach

Kubo-sensei, who’s your favorite character in Jujutsu Kaisen?

Kubo: Kento Nanami. I began to grasp the meaning of the story once he was introduced.

Akutami: I also consider his introduction to be a turning point in the series.

Kubo: The powers got more interesting around then. Early on, I wasn’t sure if Megumi Fushiguro’s technique had anything to do with shadow puppetry. I was growing impatient while reading ’cause even though he was fighting at night in a place with windows, he didn’t utilize shadows the way I expected him to. But after Nanami came along, the direction took a sharp turn; even the strangest techniques became easy to understand, and more standout characters like Aoi Todo joined the fray.

How did you feel when your dear Nanami was killed in action?

Kubo: I was like, “Aw man, he died.” But I wasn’t shocked, since this is the type of manga that doesn’t shy away from killing off characters.

Akutami: Bleach taught me a lot about when to retire characters and how to make use of them until their time is up. The Arrancar arc in particular involved a huge cast, and even though some characters obviously weren’t around for long, you got to learn the bare essentials of who they were before they left.

Kubo: It’s true that I started to actively kill more villains during the Arrancar arc. However, those weren’t calculated decisions. I mostly relied on my gut, which I suppose was for the better.

By the way, have any other Jujutsu Kaisen characters piqued your interest? Among the girls, for instance.

Kubo: I hate to say this in front of the man himself, but none of the female characters in Jujutsu Kaisen are my type. They’re all pretty formidable, aren’t they? When characters of the opposite sex get preferential treatment, they usually reflect the creator’s tastes, so that must be Akutami-sensei’s type.

Akutami: No, that’s just me taking the easy way out… I’m aware I suck at drawing women. In fact, I often put on the brakes before I create so-called “ladylike” characters.

Kubo: While your male characters come in all types, I feel like your women largely fit the same mold. Could it be that you have an aversion to creating female characters who conform to gender roles?

Akutami: That’s not quite the case…

Kubo: For real? And you don’t have a preference for the “strong female” archetype?

Akutami: Well, it’s not as if I prefer any archetypes in particular. If you were to ask me about my favorite female characters, I’d freeze up. Besides, I don’t know if the readers even want to see any ladylike or seductive female characters from me.

Kubo: I’m sure Jujutsu Kaisen readers are perfectly content with the current roster of women in the series.

How would you two respond if Todo asked what type of girls you like?

Akutami: I wouldn’t. He’d probably beat me up.

Kubo: I’d answer, “Busty ones.” Ah, that’s not my type in real life though. I only prefer big boobs on fictional characters.

Next question is for Akutami-sensei. Who’s your favorite character in Bleach?

Akutami: Either Mayuri Kurotsuchi or Kenpachi Zaraki—if I had to pick one, Kurotsuchi. He was the earliest to perform Bankai, after all. I loved how utterly disgusted I felt when I saw him for the first time. His Bankai’s final form, Matai Fukuin Shotai (Demonic Recumbent Womb), made me scream “Yes, yes, that’s my man Kurotsuchi!” in excitement.

Kubo: Mayuri’s pretty popular among mangaka. Perhaps they relate to his inventiveness and creativity. Speaking of which—Akutami-sensei, I can tell from Jujutsu Kaisen that you must be a fan of the grotesque as well.

Akutami: You’re right. I enjoy series that depict scary things in a genuinely scary way, and I strive to practice what I preach.

Surprises Regarding Favorite Scenes and Quotes

Akutami-sensei, what’s your all-time favorite scene or quote from Bleach?

Akutami: I’ve mentioned this elsewhere, but I love the Kido spell “Raikoho” (Fiery Lightning Howl).

Kubo: Due to its incantation?

Akutami: In my opinion, what sets your incantations apart from the other magic chants I’ve heard over the years is that yours evoke the strongest sense of impact. That’s what I love about them.

Kubo: Thanks.

Akutami: On that note, even though everyone seems eager to do the full incantation for Kuro Hitsugi (Black Coffin), I personally prefer the incantation-less version. First of all, Sajin Komamura getting wrecked and Gin Ichimaru saying “A level 90 unspoken Hado! Now that’s scary! When did you achieve that?” are such an iconic duo. They really made Kuro Hitsugi shine. How, you ask? By highlighting that it annihilated Captain Komamura in an instant, for goodness’ sake! To put things into perspective, Kubo-sensei routinely fills the “opening songs” of his volume releases with walls and walls of text, followed by a brief verse like Kurotsuchi’s “Born and then fall is the same as death” or Grimmjow’s “Break down, every single one of you.” The transition from long sentences to short phrases creates a sharp dichotomy that brings to mind a Kuro Hitsugi with no incantation. (TN: Those verses are from Volumes 35 and 24 of Bleach, which feature Mayuri and Grimmjow on the cover, respectively.)

Kubo: Wow, you’re a hardcore fan. [laughs] Nobody’s ever referred to my introductory poems as “opening songs” before. Maybe I should call them that from now on. [laughs]

Kubo-sensei, what’s your all-time favorite scene or quote from Jujutsu Kaisen?

Kubo: Since the Jujutsu Kaisen manga is still ongoing, I believe its best scenes are yet to come. But if had to choose from the existing material, I’d say Junpei Yoshino’s “Don’t you think that whoever first said, ‘The opposite of love is not hate, it’s indifference’ must be rotting in hell?” It’s the quote that left the deepest impression on me. Some of the references you make, and the ways you make them, are familiar; I feel a certain affinity for Jujutsu Kaisen when I read it every week.

Akutami: Thank you…

Kubo: I love incorporating Buddhist concepts as well, so I was pleasantly surprised to find someone else covering obscure topics like Death Paintings. If you recall those rings that appeared when Tosen used his Bankai, they actually had the names of the nine types of Death Paintings written on them. (TN: Jujutsu Kaisen‘s Death Painting Wombs are based on kusozu art that depicts human bodies undergoing nine stages of decay.)

Akutami: Are you serious?! That’s awesome! Bleach was my first source of inspiration in elementary school, then Hunter x Hunter and Evangelion were added to the mix in middle school… Since Evangelion was steeped in mythology, I concluded that I should take a different approach by turning to Buddhism instead.

Kubo: Which is basically Japanese mythology.

Akutami: Be that as it may, I haven’t been able to do it justice… My approach is bound to fall apart at any moment.

Kubo: You’ve done well enough in my book. As long as you understand the terms you’re using, it’s fine!

Akutami: If you say so! Kubo-sensei, did any other series influence you besides GeGeGe no Kitaro? When I read your early one-shots that were included in the Zombiepowder. volumes, I had a feeling they were heavily inspired by certain anime. (TN: Zombiepowder. was Kubo’s first weekly series. It ran from 1999-2000 and was collected into four volumes.)

Kubo: Saint Seiya comes to mind.

Akutami: Saint Seiya!!!

Kubo: I started with the GeGeGe no Kitaro anime and manga, then my parents showed me the Saint Seiya anime in fourth grade, and then I started reading Weekly Shonen Jump in sixth grade because Saint Seiya was being published in it. After that, I was probably influenced by Bastard!!: Heavy Metal, Dark Fantasy.

Akutami: Bastard!! also inspired Togashi-sensei, if I remember correctly.

Kubo: I might’ve taken inspiration from Bastard!!‘s anime-style art. It’s just, I didn’t know how to apply screentones, so I would frantically draw all my effects by hand. [laughs]

Akutami: That answers another question I’ve had for years.

It’s Not Recommended for Rookie Manga Artists to Copy Bleach

Akutami: Personally speaking, if a newbie manga artist were to say to my face, “I plan to use Kubo-sensei’s Bleach as a reference,” I’d stop them right then and there. After all, that’s something only Kubo-sensei could have produced. Everyone tells me all the time, “You must’ve been influenced by Bleach.” Of course I’m influenced by the things I read, and sometimes they affect my work in ways I don’t notice until I look back on it later. In that sense, yes, I’ve been influenced in a major way. However, I think it’s dangerous to methodically analyze Kubo-sensei with the intention of imitating him.

Editors often pay attention to the quirks that make up an author’s “identity”—the traits that are indicative of a person’s writing style, so to speak. For instance, my identity revolves around my ability to not be bogged down by “whys” or “hows”—my ability to craft a story without having to explain every little detail. I consider people like Kubo-sensei and Chainsaw Man‘s Tatsuki Fujimoto-sensei to have strong identities, and it’d be unwise for commoners like me to carelessly imitate authors of their caliber. Since their creations are products of the instincts and talents that come with having a strong identity, I’d only hurt myself if I tried to copy their methods. That’s why I go out of my way to avoid this pitfall. I’ve always loved reading Bleach, but I know that imitating it would be the death of me. Ultimately, I can’t copy it because it’s too unique. So whenever I hear people say that my series reminds them of Bleach, I hesitantly reply with something like, “Well, sure, I guess… But…”

Kubo: That’s one of the best compliments I’ve ever gotten. I’m flattered. Ah, can I have your LINE I.D.? (TN: LINE is the most popular messaging app in Japan.)

Akutami: O-Of course! My pleasure!

Special Grade Art Exhibit

Following their talk, we had Akutami-sensei and Kubo-sensei each draw one of their favorite characters from the other’s series. Feast your eyes on these exquisite illustrations.

#Jujutsu Kaisen #JJK #Gege Akutami #Bleach #Bleach manga #Tite Kubo #manga #Jujutsu Kaisen spoilers #JJK spoilers #Bleach spoilers #long post

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nursegracecreates · 2 years

Text

TW: smoking, marijuana

Jan 5

5:00 pm

About that rushed post in the middle of the night where I said Sal and I are going to find Larry? I meant it.

We're not rushing, it would be a 24 hour drive if so. But a few friends are taking our shifts at work on a promise that we'll come in for Valentine's weekend, and a few other important dates and holidays for them.

Once again, we could rely on Crow (@crowbiden) to watch the house and dogs. He lives just down the street and has the keys. We trust him to hold things down until we get back.

We threw some bags together, gassed up the car, and hit the road, splitting up the driving so Sal drove during non rush hours. We had a lot of fun driving and singing along to the 90's rock and alternative playlist Sal just made. We munched on junk food and drank way too much sugar.

Last night, we eventually stopped in a small interstate town that had a few chain hotels. I barely remember hitting the mattress.

Today, we drove to the nearest large city, deciding to do some sightseeing along the way, heading north, to Pennsylvania. Seeing as I never made it to Nockfell, never moving for college, we have a lot of ground to cover, having to travel north from where we live in *static sounds*.

So here we are in Nashville, TN, staying the night in a nice hotel, nothing too fancy. We have a balcony from our sixth floor room, and the view of the city is pretty nice. You can see the beginnings of the mountains if you look to the northeast from there. Sal is out on the balcony now, taking in the sights.

We might stay a couple of days! There are a lot of interesting things to see in Nashville. The Parthenon, Cheekwood Botanical Garden, the zoo. Sal wants to see the Johnny Cash Museum, and there's a cafe attached where we could have lunch.

I know it's technically not in Nashville, but the Bell Witch Cave isn't too far of a drive. Sal would probably love a chance to talk to some new ghosts.

Sally's been talking about Larry a lot more lately. I feel like I've been there for their whole friendship at this point. He says that he's never been able to meet a Larry in the other realities he's visited. No matter where he went, Larry was strangely missing every time Sal explored a new reality. Eventually it got so Sal could just feel if Larry was there.

When Sal first found me, he said he couldn't find any traces of Larry. He was gone just like in all the other realities.

But he had this little niggling feeling start up a few weeks ago, and in that time, the feeling grew. Sal is almost certain Larry is here, in this reality.

The most logical place to start is Nockfell. It's where Larry's home was, and therefore, the most logical place for him to be.

Sally's pretty optimistic and he's excited about the trip in general. We haven't had a chance to step away since the ghost hunt in Alton that Sally took me for in 2020. The time away together is much needed and appreciated.

I think, besides the prospect of being reunited with his best friend, Sal is excited to show me Nockfell. By the time he found me, Sal had lived in Nockfell longer than he had in Jersey. It's his home, and I'm sure he'll want to show me all the little places that hold huge memories for him. I can't blame him, I'm pretty excited too. It's always exciting to learn new things about your friends or significant others, and I'll finally be able to imagine the places where Sal's stories take place. We're hoping the apartments will even still be standing, if not still inhabited.

There is the Cult to be worried about. We've already found signs that the DOG exists in this reality as well. But there's the possibility that it didn't keep a following, or maybe, never even had one. The DOG may not even be in Nockfell in this reality. It's a little wait and see, risky, I know, but, like Sal, I believe you only live once. You can't let fear keep you from doing something important. This is important to him, even if we don't find Larry.

The flare of a lighter caught my attention from the balcony outside. Sal had a blunt clamped between his teeth, and a lighter held to the end of it, puffing until it was fully lit. His chest swelled as he inhaled and held the smoke while he stared out at the cityscape.

He grinned, crooked and self assured when he caught me watching him through the glass of the balcony door. He held the blunt between his middle and index fingers of his right hand as he extended his left pointer finger and crooked it at me, asking me to come out and join him in the chilly night for a smoke. His smile widened as he watched me get up and put my coat on. He opened the door for me, as well as his arms as I stepped out into the winter twilight.

The flower Sal had lit didn't smell too strongly. We wouldn't have to worry about it carrying and another hotel guest reporting it. Besides, a light breeze was blowing in our favor.

He handed me the blunt as I settled back into his body and I hit it, watching smoke curl from the end of the hand rolled cigar as I held the smoke for a few moments.

"Well, we have plenty to do, tomorrow" I said, "Unless you were wanting to move on instead?"

"Are you kidding?!" Sal asked, "We're in music city! We have to look around some."

We discussed our options as we smoked, adding places, and ruling out others. By the time we were done, we were confident we had just planned the best Nashville experience a couple could want. We came in, cheeks rosy from the cold and Sal turned the heat up a little.

"Alright" I said, taking off my coat and hanging it on the back of the chair, "So we spend one, maybe two days being tourists, and then we get back on the road. Sound good?"

Sally's coat joined mine, hiding it from view, and he pulled me into a hug, laying a kiss on my forehead. "It's perfect."

#sally face #sal fisher #sally fisher #sally face self ship #sally face fan art #sally face x gracie face #tw marijuana #tw smoking

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tsukishimaenthusiast · 4 years

Note

Hi!! Can I get NSFW headcanons with Tsuki, Goshiki, Kenma and Tendou where their s/o comes over to hang out and they show up in unflattering clothes (like some sweats) but they discover that underneath their s/o is wearing lingerie? Please and thank you!

rlly not sure how to title this one but

also!!! implied fem! reader

tsukishima, goshiki, kenma, and tendou when their s/o shows up to their house wearing lingerie under their sweats (nsfw headcanons)

tsukishima:

tsukishima called you earlier this morning and asked if you wanted to hang out at his house later

ofc you said yes

you recently got a new lacy lingerie set and decided to wear it underneath your leggings and hoodie

i mean, you always made sure u were prepared ahah

you arrived at tsukishima’s house and he let you in

you greeted his family and then followed him into his room

you and tsuki were laying on his bed listening to music

he placed his hand on your thigh and started massaging it

he felt you shudder underneath him and he sat up, pulling you onto his lap

tsukishima started kissing your neck

“keiiii, stopp. your family is literally right downstairs.”

“don’t care,” he hummed against you

he slid his hands up your hoodie and brought his hands to ur chest

you knew he felt the lacy material

“what’s this?”, he asked, smirking

you bit your lips and felt your face grow hot

“and here you are telling me to stop cause my parents are home… you wanted this to happen, didn’t you?”

you looked away and he grabbed your face to make u look at him again

“..naughty girl.”

you could feel how hard he was

“i should just fuck you right now… and see how quiet you can be for me. what do you think?”, he asked, chuckling

you moaned at his words

he brought his fingers to rub against your folds

“you’re already so fucking wet, y/n.”

you whimpered against his chest

“kei! y/n! food’s ready!”, you heard akiteru yell

you got off tsuki’s lap and watched him get up and head towards his door

“we’ll finish this later, y/n. i’m not done with you yet.”

goshiki:

goshiki invited you over his house to watch a volleyball game with him

since you guys were staying at his house, you decided to dress comfortable, to a certain extent

underneath your sweats, you had on your favorite lingerie set

who knows, maybe you guys could have some fun when the game was over

you guys sat in his living room and watched the game all the way through

when it finished, you guys were both pretty hungry

“wanna eat? i’ll cook something for us.”

you nodded

while goshiki was in the kitchen, you went up behind him and hugged him

“what’s up, babe?”, he turned around to face you

you gave him puppy dog eyes

“kiss me? i promise it won’t take away from your cooking time..”

he laughed as he placed his hands on your waist

he brought his lips to yours and gently kissed you

he was about to pull away when you held onto him again, not letting him leave

“one more?”, you asked politely

he kissed you again, except this time, you shoved your tongue in his mouth

you felt his grip on your hips tighten and you knew you had him

goshiki slid his hands up your shirt and he moaned at the feeling of the lace against your boobs

you grabbed one of his hands and put it in your pants, making sure he was touching him where u needed him most

“f-fuck y/n.”

you started to rub his hard-on

you guys were moaning each other’s names, both moving your hands faster, just trying to get each other off

soon enough, you felt goshiki’s dick twitch in your hands, and he started rubbing you faster, making you reach your high

you guys were both breathing pretty heavily right about now

“y/n… after we eat, you need to show me what you’re really wearing underneath all of that.”

kenma:

“y/n, want to come over?? i just got a new video game. you should play it with me.”

you got kenna��s call when you were in the middle of trying on the new clothes you bought at the mall

you decided to keep on the new lingerie set bc …. well, why not? it’s not gonna hurt anymore

you put on some joggers and an oversized sweater and headed to kenma

when you went up to kenna’s room, kuroo was there, already laying on his bed

“what’s up, y/n?! kenma really likes his new game. i’ve been playing with him for the past hour.. your turn!”

kuroo handed you the remote and walked out

“see you at practice!”, he shouted before closing the door

you sat on kenma’s bed and played with him for at least two hours.

you asked if you could have a break and he nodded

you laid in his bed and watched him play by himself for what felt like another hour

he must’ve gotten tired because he soon walked over to his bed and laid beside you

“it’s hot, kenma,” you complained

“so take off your sweater.”

“i..i can’t. i’m not wearing anything underneath.”

he raised his eyebrows at you. “huh?”

“well i mean, technically i am wearing something.. but..”

“what’re you wearing?” his asked curiously

you pulled off your sweater and revealed your new bra

he gulped at the view

“you like it? it’s new,” you said with a smile

he nodded with flushed face

“it’s actually a matching set..”

“really?”

“yea..” you said quietly as you pulled your pants down, revealing the matching panties

kenma couldn't help but stare at your exposed body in front of him, it was kind of turning you on

he leaned down to kiss you on the lips

“you look really good, y/n.”

you put your hand on his bulge, a breathy moan leaving his lips from the sudden contact

“let me help you with that,” you said while staring into his eyes

tendou:

you actually went over tendou’s house tn in hopes of gettin some

you wore his favorite red lingerie set under your sweatpants and quickly headed over to his place

you guys were cuddling in his bed, watching a movie

coincidentally, a sex scene came on lmao

tendou’s hand was already on your thigh, but when he felt you fidgeting from the scene, he looked over at you with a smirk on his lips

he quickly hovered over you and started attacking your neck with kisses

you moaned and tugged at his hair, encouraging him to do more

he pulled off your t-shirt and you swear you saw his eyes light up when he saw what you were wearing

he then moved to your sweatpants and tugged at the waistband

he pulled down your pants all the way and his excited eyes soon grew to those of lust

“really? all this for me? what did i ever do to deserve you?”

he kissed you harshly on the lips

tendou admires your body for a bit before bringing his mouth his mouth to your tits

he definitely made sure to leave hickies behind

he started kissing down your torso and stomach until he reached your waist

he rubbed your clit over your panties, making you grind your hips against his fingers

“please satori.. do more… please,” you begged

“your wish is my command.”

he pushed your panties aside and shoved two fingers into you

“shit y/n, you’re so fucking wet.

hearing his voice alone made you clench around his fingers

he started pumping his fingers in and out of you

you bit your lip

“fuck, go faster. please. i need more,” you whimpered

tendou brought another finger to your clit and started rubbing it

the added pleasure made you squirm underneath him

he quickly pumped his fingers inside of you at a fast speed

“g-gonna come,” you shouted

he started grunting and looking into your eyes

“do it, baby. come for me,” he demanded

you squeezed your eyes shut and moaned his name, releasing on his fingers

he brought his fingers to his mouth, tasting you

he kissed you on the lips soon afterwards

“i hope you’re ready to come again. cause i’m gonna fuck your pretty little cunt.”

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theinvisibledreamergirl · 3 years

Text

Sweet dreams, TN

Pairing: Ethan Ramsey x F!MC (Helena Craig) x M!OC (Clay Banner)

Words count: ~2.1k

Category: Smut/Angst/AU

Warning: 🔞 content/Language

A.N: I really wanted to picture something else. What if my MC didn’t get her place at Edenbrook Hospital in her first year and her boyfriend did? And what happens if she comes as a surgical resident in the 2nd year? Also I’ve decided that in this fic I’ll call MC in her middle name Helena or shortened Helen/Ellie. It’s the alter-ego of Klaw so it has nothing to do with her. After posting this I’ll log off from Tumblr ‘cause I know it’s a disaster😭😭😭😭

Song: “Sweet dreams, TN” - The Last Shadow Puppets (pls hear this first to understand it better ❤️)

MASTERLIST

———————————————

I just sort of always feel sick without you baby

I ain’t got anything to lick without you baby

Nothing seems to stick without you baby

Ain’t I fallen in love

“Do you have the keys for the handcuffs?”

“Whoa. Is someone getting a little afraid hm?”

“Well I don’t want to be useless without my hands. So I can touch you.”

“I do have the keys darling.” The two faces were closer breathing into each other’s air. “But I need you to be quiet now.”

“Show me then.”

It’s just the pits without you baby

It’s really just the pits without you baby

It’s like everyone’s a dick without you baby

Ain’t I fallen in love

The command was clear and both of them entered to the inevitable path.

Feeling each other’s skins in the most obscenely way and falling to that wild imagination that both of them had been restraining for a long time.

It was a heavenly and a desirably emotion that led themselves to be part of this trap.

They could hear their accelerated heartbeats as more and more they looked hungrily and darkly like animals fighting for domination.

Blue vs Brown.

“I missed you.”

“I missed you too.”

And all my pals will tell me is that I’m crazy

You bet I’m loopy alright

And I just don’t recognise this fool

That you have made me

Whoa I ain’t seen him for a while

Panting breath wasn’t in their expectations and shared a laugh before they reached the culmination and he unlocked her handcuffs to fall completely in his arms.

Their strong embrace fitted perfectly the curves of their bodies despite their sweat. When he was about to pull off she pouted in a whisper.

“No. Stay.”

“I will.” He promised with a searing kiss.

“But you did left me.” Her expression changed completely and in a mere of seconds she wasn’t there.

He blinked. “What?”

The sound of the alarm woke him up and suddenly he felt his underwear soaked.

“Holy shit I did this again!” He growled in frustration as he rubbed his face.

He made attempts to get up but his knees were too weak to keep his balance. Another attempt and he slowly started to walk. Or better a crawling you may call it.

He turned on his bathtub to make a quick shower and to clear this mess of himself. But the hot water made him feel again those goosebumps of that sweet dream and closed his eyes again.

She looped his arms around his waist and start to kiss his shoulders slowly and gently while moving her hands up and down his bellybutton. He let a content sigh while drifting again to that imaginary scene.

And as your shrinking figure blows a kiss

I catch and smash it on my lips

Darling I can’t seem to quit.

When there wasn’t a shoulder to lean on his head, he slapped his face growling loudly and continued his shower in disappointment.

Completely falling to bits

I really might be losing it

The idea that you’ve existed all along is ridiculous

I don’t know what to say

He missed her.

Not longer after that he arrived at Edenbrook gladly on time thanks to his fast BMW vehicle. He carried his bag through the hall of the hospital and a megawatt smile that he recognised it very well stopped him.

“Yo yo look who’s back again. My mann!” They clapped their backs.

“Ooff Bryce!” He was breathing hardly. “We were celebrating yesterday for the end of our intern year. I’m sure that we didn’t miss each other that much.”

“C’mon Banner can’t you just be funnier person in your life for once hm?”

Clay rolled his eyes. “Anyways I have to change my clothes unless you don’t have anything else to say.”

“I do actually.” He wiggled his eyebrows. “I met someone today.”

“So?”

“You have no idea whom I have met.”

“Let me guess did President Biden come here?” He snorted when he saw Bryce’s not amused reaction. “Okay fine go on.”

“As I was saying I met today a female but let me tell you man... this woman is not like the others. She’s like a goddess that entered to this building and blessed my life when I made eye contact with her.”

Clay was really trying his best not to laugh to this exaggeration. “You have met plenty of women and it’s not your first time Bryce.”

“Tsk. It is my first time. And may I add she was like queen Cleopatra that summoned everyone when she walked here.” Bryce added in a wandering gaze while he was doing his usual ministrations. “Black stilettos clicking and wearing those black leathery pants revealing her curves...ohh I’m thinking I’m going to fall in love man. She had a long coat on her shoulders and that white shirt mmhmm.” He closed his eyes. “She truly was the boss and I’m betting on this... her elegant body will be in my bed. But-”

“And there’s always a but right?”

“Can you believe I didn’t get her name?! Not even her number!”

His friend squealed in laughter. “What did you think fool? That she was going to follow you straight into the on-call room?”

“Yes!” Bryce exclaimed. “That’s what I thought too man but I lost her because that damn nurse came to me for signing a patient in a surgery.” He sighed and shook his head. “I lost the most perfect chance today and I don’t even know what she was doing here... she can’t be a doctor though ‘cause she’s too beautiful for this job.”

“Well then good luck on finding her ‘cause I have to go now. See you.” He trailed off to the direction of the elevator.

“Yea see ya.” He waved back at him before he muttered. “Go back to surgery Bryce before Tanaka cuts you off.”

————————

“This is going to be your office.”

“Thank you so much Mist- Dr. Tennant!” She corrected herself briefly before she would say another embarrassing thing. “I really don’t know how to express my gratitude for this.”

He scoffed. “Please can you just talk normally Dr. Craig? I think at the first time we met the rule was by names. Call me Simon.”

“Sure. Simon.” She really wasn’t used to it though. First no title of Miss/Mister and now calling by names. USA had really big differences with UK not only in titles but also in medical policy and legacy.

“And now I must say to you congratulations!” They shook hands. “And also I’d like to introduce you to our Diagnostics Team.”

She nodded in agreement.

When they finally arrived at the front door Simon stepped first to get the attention of his colleagues who seemed to be occupied as they were studying a case so he cleared his throat loudly. All of them turned their gazes to him except for an attending who didn’t even have to recognise his friend’s voice.

“What now Simon?”

“Hello to you too my pal. You know everyone that there was going to be a resident in the absence of Edgar’s, right?”

“Yes we know that.” The Japanese-British woman spoke.

“Have you brought him here?!” Judging by his accent it was an Indian man who exclaimed happily.

Simon chuckled. “Yes Baz but it’s her.”

“Ooooohh.”

“Let’s hope she’ll be useful for this job.”

“Don’t worry Ethan. She was selected as the best surgical intern in Imperial College of London Hospital and many other things among but I’ll let her to present herself.” He made her a signal to come inside.

“Everyone this is Dr. Helena Craig.”

“Please you can call me Helen or Ellie if you want.”

“I like Helen better.” The woman got up and shook her hand. “Dr. June Hirata.”

“Me too! Hi I’m Dr. Sebastian Mirani but everyone calls me simply Baz.”

“Ethan?” Simon asked quietly to get up and greet with her but he wasn’t moving any inch.

Helen gave him a knowing smile and said without breaking her gaze to him. “It’s alright for me if we don’t shake hands. I feel the same way too when I meet people that haven’t given me a good and a reliable impression at first so I completely understand your condition now.”

She caught him off guard. Ethan Ramsey expected her to scowl or glare into his eyes but instead she was killing him with that radiating smile.

Fuck.

The same smile that was reserved for him yesterday at Donahue’s bar.

In the corner of his eyes there was an unfamiliar face that stayed some stools away from him.

She lit up a cigarette even though Reggie had been strictly to every client not to use it but it seemed she didn’t care about it.

Her blonde hair was tied up in a bun revealing her constructed jaw and her long neck.

She had also earrings pierced. Was she a troublesome woman? Or maybe a drugs dealer judging by her extravagant outfit. But what caught his attention was that she didn’t look amused or happy.

She was sad. And exhausted.

Along with her was a small luggage that she had carried with herself here. She called Reggie to bring her a strong scotch and found by the latter that she was British and it was her first time in Boston.

She had also asked him for a hotel nearby this place and Reggie suggested some of them including “La Vista” Hotel which was the best. She thanked and left him the payment.

Now her eyes landed on the icy blue that had been staring on her for a long time and gave him a wicked smile. She raised her glass in purpose and licked her lips after drinking bits of it.

She was really gorgeous in all of his honesty and they didn’t break their eye contact for maybe a couple of minutes. He could do it every time without any hesitation just to rest in those piercing brown’s.

He was a very handsome man and even though he seemed older than her, she didn’t give a single shit. She could imagine his toned muscles and abs beyond those pesky clothes. She was marveled and could sense that he felt the same too.

It was like they both understood each other.

No words needed.

Only looks.

But she knew who he was. Ethan Ramsey. And she was glad that made him completely at her mercy and was enjoying it.

Poor man she thought.

She couldn’t wait for his reaction tomorrow when he would find out who she was actually.

His colleague.

Helen could imagine his flustered face and transfixed into her with his mouth agape.

She got up from her seat slowly in a tantalizing move while he drank in one gulp his scotch and called Reggie again for another fill.

She walked past him but before leaving with her luggage she lowered her head to his ear whispering dangerously. Her breath was a tingle in his ears and could almost feel her lips brushed.

“Thank you for the distraction. I really needed it.”

She left unceremoniously when something dropped from her and he immediately caught it.

It was one of her earrings with the initial ‘H’. He was about to call her but she was gone.

Maybe he would find her tomorrow again. Here.

And he really found her. In the most obscenely and the most embarrassing way if he could describe it. Instead of what she said he got up with his smuggling look.

“Wrong observation.” When she heard his deep voice for the first time she gulped and could see his eyes glimmering triumphantly. “I hope you don’t ruin this opportunity.”

He caught her off guard. While they were touching each other’s palms an unknown heat coursed down in their bodies. Bullshit they thought because he was just an attending and she was a resident. Suddenly another voice was approaching to them.

“I’m terribly sorry for my lateness but I was-”

He abruptly stopped himself when he saw her.

His eyes were widened and his breath hitched.

She was here.

Baby we ought to fuck

Seven years of bad luck

Out of the powder room mirror

Could I have made it any clearer

She saw him too.

But not with a happy or a grateful face that always had welcomed his heart.

This was a mere seconds of glaring and then a plastered smile that he knew too well.

Clay Banner had screwed things up a year before he entered Edenbrook Hospital.

And now the woman of his dreams was standing right in front of him with his attending.

His girlfriend.

His Helen.

Or... was?

It’s love like a tongue in a nostril

Love like an ache in the jaw

You’re the first day of spring

With a septum piercing

Little Miss Sweet Dreams, TN

—————————————————————-

TAGS WILL APPEAR IN A REBLOG!

Ps: if this fic doesn’t surpass The Grinch Girl fic notes... there’s not going to be a part two😂😂 sorry...and Happy (late) International Women’s Day💪🏻💋🥰🥰

UPDATE: Part two is posted and it’s called- She’s thunderstorms

#open heart fan fiction #open heart choices #open heart fan fic #oh au #n*fw #ethan ramsey #my mc #ethan ramsey x mc #clay banner #clay banner x mc #triangle of love series #part one #my writing

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felassan · 3 years

Note

Hi, thank you for your wonderful metas and explanations. Not sure if I'm getting this right though: if we get two last Archdemons as Dirthamen and Falon'Din and if they get killed.. wouldn't that make all Evanuris but Solas and Mythal, dead? What happens when the Archdemon dies? And if all the Archdemons are dead, will this end the Age of Dragon? Will there never be any more blights?

Hi Nonnie! Thank you :) Answer under cut due to length.

The first part of the line of speculation here depends on several things like: whether there really is a link between the Evanuris and the Old Gods (and if so, what is it? several different kinds of connection are theorized, including a number which don’t hold that it’s a case of direct one-to-one equivalence), whether Mythal is already truly dead or not (some think yes, some think no), whether it’s those two Evanuris specifically (a number of other candidates for the identities of the figures are speculated and entirely possible) and whether Solas will survive the events of the next game.

That stuff aside, the bulk latter part of your question is an Unknown that’s been set up as Ominous since Inquisition. Here’s Solas in dialogue with Blackwall:

[discussing the Grey Wardens]

Solas: The Wardens see themselves as the world's defense against the Blight do they not? Blackwall: Yes... Why do you sound so skeptical? Doesn't everyone know this? Solas: When an Archdemon rises, they slay it. What will they do when all the Archdemons are slain? Blackwall: Retire? Solas: Without Archdemons, there can be no Blights. Is that the reasoning? Blackwall: Right. Where are you going with this? Solas: Nowhere. I hope they are correct.

and Blackwall and Varric:

Solas: The Grey Wardens allow elves and dwarves into their ranks? Varric: Qunari too I imagine. They don't care about titles or blood, just stopping the Blight. Solas: A pity they do it so badly then. Blackwall: Would you care to repeat that? Solas: Argue if you like, your fight against the darkspawn is noble, but what progress have you made? Varric: Give them some credit, it's not like you can study the Blight safely. I may not like everything they've done, but without the wardens, we'd all be Blighted by now. Solas: They've bought us some time, I will grant them that.

and Cassandra:

[post-Adamant]

Cassandra: You don't think much of the Grey Wardens, Solas. Solas: They are fools, a fact only amplified by Corypheus' meddling. Cassandra: A harsh assessment. But after Adamant, perhaps not undeserved.

and Vivienne:

[post-Adamant]

Vivienne: You disapprove of Corypheus using the magic of the Blight, Solas? Solas: Every intelligent creature should. Vivienne: Yet you raise no objection to the Grey Wardens using blood magic? Solas: Blood magic is no worse than any other, properly used. But the Blight... Solas: The Blight corrupts everything it touches. Those who believe themselves capable of using it safely are mad. Vivienne: I understand that Grey Wardens are connected in some way to the Blight. Solas: Then that explains why we saw no old men at Adamant.

And here’s some of his dialogue during and after Here Lies The Abyss:

Erimond: A Blight happens when darkspawn find an Old God and corrupt it into an Archdemon. If someone fought through the Deep Roads and killed the Old Gods before they could be corrupted... no more Blights, ever. The Wardens sacrifice their lives and save the world. Solas: [hella angry] That’s madness! For all we know killing the Old Gods could make things even worse!

---

Solas: [super agitated] We must stop the Wardens from carrying out this insane plan Inquisitor! To seek out these Old Gods deliberately... in some bizarre attempt to prevent the Blight... [...] Those fools and duty... responsibility is not expertise. Action is not inherently superior to inaction. Forgive me, the entire idea is - unnerving. Inquisitor: I wouldn’t mind never having another Blight. Corypheus interfering is the real problem. Solas: [pretty irritated] The Blight is the real problem! Inquisitor: And the Wardens are trying to end the Blight forever. Solas: Yes! Would it have worked? Do you know? Did they? The fools who first unleashed the Blight upon this world thought they were unlocking ultimate power!

---

Solas: If you don’t stop them, we’ll all fall.

---

Solas: Even if they could succeed, the entire idea is wrong. The Blight is not something one smugly outsmarts.

It’s clear he dislikes or disagrees with aspects of the Wardens in a general sense, even if they’d never gotten up to what they tried to do in Inquisition (that’s another topic). But he also either seems to know Something that he’s withholding, or else he fears possible consequences/potential unknown consequences of them (or anyone) succeeding in killing the remaining Old Gods. He’s incensed thinking about it. The idea deeply unsettles him, and he fears the Blight and what it can do. And I wonder if the ‘Something’ will be to do with the true nature of and the origin of the Blight. It also may intersect with things like the Fade and the Black City.

So the question of what will happen with regards to the Blight when all of the Old Gods are gone feels like one we’re meant to be asking and speculating on at the moment, one we’re still meant to be in the dark about til some reveal. It’s often theorized that the Old Gods are ‘keys’ (or rather, more like locked padlocks) to the prison (or ‘prison’) where the Evanuris are caged, or that they’re vessels for pieces of their souls, or that they’re [functionally] like seals or gateways keeping something at bay from the world of Thedas, like, say, in the Black City - “And I looked up and saw // The seven gates of the Black City shatter // And darkness cloaked both realms.” - which as we know is Tainted and also apparently, according to the latest mural, infested by red lyrium too.. These sorts of ideas often make reference to the Dread Wolf Rises teaser mural, where there are 7 hemispheres arranged on the outside of the repeating concentric circles pattern which usually represents the Veil. Only 2 of the hemispheres are still lit, the rest are dark. They’re often thought to represent the 5 dead Old Gods and the 2 who remain alive, sleeping. These sorts of ideas cast the Old Gods’ current situation as a temporary solution, staving off a massive looming problem for a while, essentially. Sometimes the ‘something’ is linked to the Void/the Abyss. (It’s tough to call though as the pattern inside the hemispheres is the same as what’s found on elven foci/power orbs in other murals, which are almost certainly Titan hearts.)

Something to bear in mind also is that no more Blights (as in the plagues of darkspawn attacking the surface world directed by an Archdemon) doesn’t mean no more Taint/Blight or no more darkspawn. Blights are events, not the origin or the cause, and darkspawn have their own means of.. creating more darkspawn.. and darkspawn don’t disappear or combust when an Archdemon is killed, they go back underground to look for a new Old God. What if that compulsion was no more? Consider the Mother, who after being freed from the song/call of the Old Gods went mad. She birthed a new variety of darkspawn and there was a darkspawn civil war. Think of the Architect, who once wanted to spread the Taint to every non-darkspawn person in Thedas, and then accidentally caused the Fifth Blight. The Disciples, along with free will, gained higher intelligence, the ability to strategize and emotional behavior patterns (not just mindless plague-locust or worker-bees-to-a-queen-bee behavior anymore). The Messenger was fairly benevolent and if let go wanders around as a helpful traveler, but he still inadvertently spreads the Taint wherever he goes in that outcome, which cannot be permitted due to the impact on peoples’ health and on ecosystem health. Would darkspawn who are no longer urged by the Call to dig for an Old God stay on the surface wreaking havoc, in a perma-[quasi]Blight with no clear-cut way to end it as there’s no Archdemon to slay? Would we see something like the events of Awakening, only Thedas-wide? If they’d now have awakened intelligence, would they attack with advanced tactics? Or with some of them maddened and without an Archdemon to direct them, would it just be general chaos? I’d worry about Orzammar too; part of the reason why Orzammar has managed to persist thus far is that most of the darkspawn are usually burrowing away looking for the Old Gods, and only randoms and straggling groups end up attacking Orzammar (relatively speaking, at least). Without the Call, it could be overrun.

Dragons are quite resistant to the Blight, compared to other creatures, able to section off parts of their own flesh to stem the spreading extent of its corruption - to a point. There’s a metaphor in there somewhere that links back to the notion that the setup of the 7 Old Gods, as they were anyway, slumbering, isn’t a solution that can keep Whatever It Is at bay indefinitely.

What’s Solas thinking of when he says “I hope you are correct”? What catastrophic thing happening have the Wardens bought us some time before it occurs? In what ways could things get worse? Why is Solas convinced in TN that he has no choice and that what he’s doing will save this world? Messing with the Blight never ends well, time’s running out, there’s something going on with the Old Gods, and the possibilities for what could happen if all the darkspawn were suddenly freed from their singular purpose of following the song are alarming. Whatever will happen when the last Old God or Archdemon is killed, it doesn’t sound good though does it?

#dragon age 4 #the dread wolf rises #dragon age #bioware #mj replies #anonymous #video games #solas #cassandra pentaghast #my lady paladin #tevinter nights #tevinter nights spoilers #tevinter nights spoiler #spoilers #spoiler

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solartranslations · 3 years

Text

AF2 Luca Chapter 3 (12/22): Bewildered Flame

She takes a walk at the island’s marketplace as usual and surprisingly runs into…

~*Scene: Harbor*~

Felicita: …

Nova: What are you doing?

Felicita: Huh…?

Nova: The Swords are supposed to be escorting someone today. What are you shopping around here for?

Ash: Huh!? How do you know what every department is doing…

Felicita: He really is amazing

Ash: No, I’m saying Nova is way too picky

Nova: Because I have to be. So, you’re skipping out even though you’re the executive?

Felicita: No, I’m not

Felicita: We finished what we had to do and are moving independently now

Ash: Ah, ok. So what’re you doing?

Felicita: Martha and the Triad asked me for a favor so I’m helping them out…

Nova: Oh that’s what it is. It’s the same for us

Ash: I’m just following the Chalices around. Everyone said to go with them if I wanted to get experience working

Felicita: Nice, Nova!

Nova: It’s not a big deal

Ash: No, you really are doing a lot

Nova: Is that supposed to be praise?

Felicita: *laugh*

Ash: Oh, isn’t that Luca over there?

Felicita: It is. Lu…

Felicita: !

Nova: What?

Felicita: He’s with someone…a woman…

Nova: Luca’s with a woman? That’s not you? …!

Felicita: Neve…?

Nova: They look kind of suspicious. Like they’re sneaking around

Felicita: ……

Nova: …You’re not going to say hi?

>No, let’s just go

(+10 Amore)

>I’ll just watch for a bit

(No Amore)

Nova: …Really?

Felicita: What?

Nova: You really look like you’re curious though

Felicita: You’re imagining it

Nova: What good will that do. If you’re worried, then go talk to him

Felicita: If they’re meeting in secret, then it’s either work…or something they don’t want others to hear

Nova: Then that’s even more reason to go and ask

Felicita: …Nevermind, let’s just go

Nova: Are you sure?

Felicita: I know Neve likes Vir, so it’s not like there’d be anything between her and Luca

Nova: That might be true, but I still don’t like them sneaking around like that

Felicita: Sometimes Luca does that

Nova: ……

Felicita: But…I hardly ever see Neve talk to anyone when it’s not about her work as a merchant…

Ash: You seriously are worried then

Felicita: It’s fine. If you two aren’t busy then help me out. I’ve got a lot to bring back

Ash: Huh!? Isn’t that really something you should ask the hat guy…

Nova: We’ll go, Ash. Helping people in need on the island is part of our job

Felicita: Nova…thank you

~*Scene: Harbor*~

Luca: …Just as I thought, so you do know herbal medicine. Let’s do this again tomorrow then

Neve: Alright. I’ll be waiting

Neve: Actually, I also have a request…

Luca: Yes?

Luca: Recipes for Regalo cuisine?

Neve: I thought I’d cook some for my husband

Luca: I see, I’m sure he’d love it. When we return to the mansion I’ll give you my special recipe for Regalo Hot Po…—

Luca: Ojou-sama…with Nova and Ash. I guess they’re on their way home from work

Neve: She was watching you earlier

Luca: Ojou-sama was?

Neve: Yes. You’re together, right? I hope she didn’t misunderstand…

Luca: Misunderstand?

Neve: You might have relationship troubles

Luca: D-don’t say that…

Neve: I can do a palm reading if you’re worried?

Luca: Please do!

Neve: That’ll be 3000 Lira (TN: about $2 US)

Luca: You certainly don’t joke around

~*Scene: Felicita’s Room*~

(*knock knock)

Mariella: Ojou-sama, Luca asked me to bring this to you

(*rustle)

Felicita: ?

~*Scene: Rose Garden*~

Felicita: It’s cold

Luca: Wha!? Is something displeasing you, Ojou-sama?

Felicita: Just that it’s cold. So, what’s with the sudden letter?

Luca: Well…I just wanted to spend time with you

Felicita: It’s already night…

Luca: We’re a couple so I thought it was appropriate

Felicita: This isn’t the right place

Luca: S-should we go somewhere else then? Debito would say the right place is “in bed” but…

Felicita: Here’s fine

Luca: *laugh*…there’s a reason why we’re here

Luca: Here, it’s this!

Felicita: What is that?

Luca: It’s a brazier. I hear it’s fun to warm up while grilling food with it!

Felicita: It does sound fun

Luca: I bought it from Vir’s store. They have a lot of items from the East and the continent. It’s all so interesting

Luca: By the way Ojou-sama, did you come to the market with Nova earlier today?

Felicita: Yeah

Luca: I knew it! I was there too. I didn’t realize until you were leaving though…

Felicita: …

Luca: Did you see me there too? I wish you’d said something, then we could have went for some dolce together…

Felicita: Did you go with Neve instead then?

Luca: Huh? Ah, no, I didn’t. I just meant that I wish we could have gone on a date

Felicita: Hmm… These grilled zucchini are really good

Luca: …You really are bad at lying, Ojou-sama. It looks like there’s more that you want to say

Felicita: Are you good at lying then, Luca?

Luca: What are you talking about?

Felicita: You looked like you were sneaking around

Luca: Ojou-sama, are you jealous?

Felicita: Wha!?

Felicita: …!

(*kick)

Luca: Ow… I was right then?

Felicita: F-forget it! Did something happen with Neve?

Luca: Having you get jealous over me really feels special, Ojou-sama. *laugh*

Luca: So…I guess you want to know what I was doing with Neve. She was actually asking me for advice

Felicita: Advice?

Luca: Yes. She said that she wanted to cook something from Regalo for Vir

Luca: She couldn’t find you, so she asked me when we ran into each other while shopping

Luca: I was quite critical about the drinks when we first met

Felicita: So that’s what it was…

Luca: Feel better now?

(*smile) Felicita: Yeah

Felicita: I hope Neve can make a good Regalo Hot Pot

Luca: And, Ojou-sama. You know I would be jealous too if you went on a date with Nova or Ash, right?

Felicita: Did you just want to say that from the start?

Luca: Of course

Felicita: …You’re so childish, Luca

Luca: So? That’s just how I am

Felicita: But I don’t hate it

Luca: Okay, how about trying this grilled mushroom then?

Felicita: …It’s good

Luca: I succeeded in making you smile

—Later—

~*Scene: Rose Garden*~

Luca: The herbal medicine you gave me seems to have been very effective

Neve: I’m glad. I’ll make some more, so keep using it

Neve: They relax the mind so you can get a good dreamless sleep. They also relieve fatigue that might not be obvious

Luca: Thank you. And these are for you. Some fresh herbs I picked this morning

Neve: Thank you. I’m glad since I only have dried ones with me

~*Scene: Hallway*~

Felicita: Luca and Neve…? What are they doing…

Giorgio: Let’s go, Ojou. Our client is waiting

Felicita: Yeah…

~*End of Scene*~

(Continue Common Route)

(Back to Directory)

#luca #arcana famiglia #arcana famiglia 2 #chapter 3 #solar translations #psp game #translation #releases #not sure why they're going with the jealousy?? plot??#but sure ok #hm....

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wonderlustlucas · 4 years

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four - hwang hyunjin

⇢ prompt They say good things come in fours. Who? Couldn’t tell you, but they especially do during Christmas. Maybe that’s just Saint Nick. ⇢ pairing hyunjin x female reader ⇢ word count 11.7k ⇢ genre fluff ⇢ warnings swearing. mentions of alcohol & s e x. teenagerz being teenagerz. insane amount of fluff & stupidity. kind of ends w a smutty cliffhanger. ⇢ summary After suppressing how you felt about Hyunjin back in high school, you thought you were done going back on your feelings. Turns out, a little time apart, the spirit of Christmas, and an accidental nap is the perfect cocktail for falling in love with your best friend.—friends to lovers!au ⇢ a/n hello & merry christmas! here is a gift for you all on this very merry day. also, thank you for 1,000 followers! that in itself is one of the best presents i could ask for. thank you for all your kindness & support on my blog & for following me in the first place! it truly means so much to me. i hope you enjoy reading! ♥︎

big tiddy jinny🍯🧸🌟🖇[now] Sorry! I just woke up

big tiddy jinny🍯🧸🌟🖇[now] Whats wrong fool

big tiddy jinny🍯🧸🌟🖇[now] Did u rlly think 12 texts were gonna wake me up?🤦🏻‍♂️ godt damn u on some WACK shit

You roll your eyes in time with each consecutive text that Hyunjin sends, waiting for the lock screen of your phone to blacken after reading them. He’s about as useless as pedals on a wheelchair, you think, ignoring the texts and forcing the device into the snug back pocket of your jeans before transferring the last two excessively packed grocery bags into the trunk of your car with an exhausted huff. Christ, if the bagging lady put one more item in those bags, she would be the one to blame for six cans of soup rolling about the parking lot.

The license plate rattles when you slam the trunk lid closed before hurrying around to the driver’s side and anxiously hopping inside to start blasting the heat. It is obnoxiously chilly for the first of September. Well, not really. Your body is just beginning to get used to the ungodly wrath of summer’s sweltering heat leaving you in a constant state of sweat and nausea for the past three months. Not that you’re complaining, of course. You nearly did somersaults of joy when the morning news reported a temperature of sixty-one degrees with some wind gusts and welcomed the beginning signs of autumn with open arms.

You would never admit to Mom who told yo uon the way out to change out of a tank top or at least wear a jacket, but yes— you are, in fact, cold. But now you have godsent warmth blowing from the vents and the seat warmer on its highest setting beginning to thaw away the goosebumps painted on your skin. Giving your arms one last rub, you lean up enough to retrieve your phone and open the conversation with Hyunjin.

[2:37 PM] YN: please. smell my balls

[2:37 PM] YN: nothings wrong btw. i was GOING to ask if u wanted any specific snacks for tn buttttt someone didn’t answer

[2:37 PM] YN: and excuse u i called too. i may be an idiot but im not stupid

[2:38 PM] YN: ik u would never hear a text when ur having wet dreams of yeji

You stop there with a smug smirk when the three dots on his side appear, knowing you’ve hit his funny bone with this one.

[2:38 PM] big tiddy jinny🍯🧸🌟🖇: Bruh

[2:38 PM] big tiddy jinny🍯🧸🌟🖇 :I’ve literally never have had a wet dream ab Yeji pls stop

You cannot fight your shit-eating grin, thumbs circling over the keyboard in thought as he apparently deletes whatever other text he was going to send when the three dots disappear.

[2:38 PM] YN: mmhmmmm

[2:38 PM] YN: because last time you slept over you weren’t whimpering her name in ur sleep

[2:38 PM] YN: sureeeee

You decide to end your teasing there and continue once you’re home. It is starting to get late, after all, and Mom will begin to worry that the creepy employee always in aisle sixteen has abducted you. Plus, you’re cruel and like to watch Hyunjin suffer. Switching the ringer off, you throw your phone into the cupholder and drastically lower the heat and turn off the seat warmer. It’s starting to feel like a sauna in here, and not in a fun way. Can’t understand how anyone enjoys hanging out in a sauna to begin with anyway, but to each their own, you guess.

In the five-minute drive it takes until you are pulling into the driveway, Hyunjin calls three times. He is incredibly peeved at your lack of a response to his distressed texts and still wound up from your text about Yeji. As if! You’re already a clown not realizing his ever-growing affections for you, but to think he had a crush on Yeji? You’re the whole damn circus!

By the time he calls a fifth time, now sat up on his elbow in bed and strumming an annoyed beat of his fingers at his thigh because he really just wants to yell at you for being the most annoying person alive (and maybe to hear your voice, too), you have brought in the last of the bags and look to Mom who has started to put the groceries away and expects you to half-heartedly do the same.

“It’s Hyunjin. He’s having an existential crisis because I haven’t answered his texts,” you explain to her, unenthusiastically holding your phone as it vibrates against your palm. Half of you wants her to ask to finish putting everything away first just so you can torture him even longer. Alas, such extravagant wishes are denied, because when it comes to Hyunjin, your parents would undoubtedly throw you under the bus just to keep that boy happy. And so, just like any other time, Mom’s undying love for Hyunjin has her dismissing you from the kitchen with a hearty laugh.

“Jesus Christ! What?” You hiss, halfway up the stairs when you tap to answer his call on the last ring.

“Wow! Look who finally decided to answer!” Hyunjin shouts back, the swoosh of his sheets once he finally falls back against his pillow again rustling all too loudly through the phone. “I was driving,” you spit, marching into your bedroom and collapsing against your bed, the same rustle of your blankets sounding loudly into his ear. “There’s a thing called the speaker, ___. Ever heard of it?” He retorts, evidently shutting you up and he knows he won this round if your silence is anything to go by.

“Whatever,” you groan, using all your toe strength to kick the sneakers off your feet by their soles, “what was so important that you couldn’t wait and had to call me five billion times?”

“I had a question. And you hurt my feelings.” Well, shit. You can practically hear and see his pout through the phone and your heart positively swells in your chest at how undeniably, unjustifiably cute he is. You sigh.

“I’m sorry for making fun of you about Yeji. I’m going to do it again but next time I promise I won’t pull the wet dream card,” you apologize frankly; because, in all honesty, it would be worse to say you are not going to do it again when you most certainly will. Bullying Hyunjin is fun, what can you say?

Hyunjin heaves an exasperated breath from his lungs because he knows there is no point in arguing with quite possibly the most sarcastic human he knows and that’s the best form of an apology he’s going to get. Whatever. He’ll make sure to wipe his morning snot and droll on your shirt in the morning. “Anyway,” he grumbles, in the background you hear Kkami bark from a few rooms over, “I was going to ask if you wanted to come over my place instead? I know your parents probably want to see me and stuff but mine are out of town for the night so we can sleep in my bed until like three without Mom waking us up to force feed breakfast.” You roll your eyes. Of course your parents want to see him.

“Plus, Mom just put that grey comforter I know you really like on my bed so we can cuddle all night and watch stuff on YouTube,” he quickly adds as a convincing afterthought. He’s really got his sales pitch going on this one. Truth is, you have only slept in his bed with that stupidly soft blanket twice last winter break, but it’s still sweet that he remembers how much you loved it (aka how quickly you fell asleep and how grumpy you were being woken up because it’s just that darn cozy). Either way, you would never pass up an opportunity to snuggle up with Hyunjin in the comfort of his own bed with his citrusy, floral scent on the pillows luring you to sleep.

“My Mom is going to be heartbroken, Hyunjin,” you tease, “but who cares. You had me sold at sleeping until three. Do you still want me to bring the snacks I got?”

“Oh, thank God. I love your Mom’s cooking but I haven’t left bed all day and I really want to keep it that way. And yes, please. I’ve been eating dry cereal for the past two hours.”

“Hyunjin, have you brushed your teeth yet?”

“No. Didn’t you just hear me? I said I’ve been in bed all day. Eating cereal. When would I have brushed my teeth?”

“You’ve officially taken breakfast in bed to a whole new level, Jin. I’ll see you in a few hours. Oh, and please, you have no concept of personal space so make sure you brush your teeth before I come over.”

“Yeah, yeah. Whatever. Love ya, bye,” Hyunjin promptly hangs up, probably eager to get back to binging whatever drama he’s watching before you lecture him about his hygiene again. Not that it matters, anyway; chances are, it went in one ear and right out the other and you’re going to drag him out of bed later to brush his teeth.

Damn. You didn’t even get the chance to say love you back. Not that it matters.

It doesn’t, you quickly shut down the pesky thought that keeps you up at night and force it back into the storage part of your brain labeled ‘Deal with Later,’ because, really, you’ll have to think about that later. It’s not that you don’t want to think about it yet… you just don’t have the time to stop and really figure out what your feelings toward Hyunjin actually are. Yeah. That’s it.

And now isn’t the time, you tell yourself, scooting up the mattress in order to bury your face in the pillows to suffocate the pounding throb in your head. Hyunjin is nothing special.

Well, no. That’s a lie. Everything about Hyunjin is special. Anyone with eyes, ears, even a nose can sense that. You had quickly found out just how wonderful he is when you met him freshman year of high school. At the time, he was everyone’s sweetheart by the first day, but it just so happened his eyes were all on you.

He was obviously adorable, and every class you had together he always made a point to talk to you and returned your sarcasm with an impressive level of expertise. So, when it came to him asking you to the first homecoming, the answer was yes without a second thought. But during the last slow dance of the night, with his hands gently holding your waist, he at last listened to his conscience and revealed that as much as he liked you, he truly did not want to date in high school. Or right then, at least. And honestly, you were glad; Hyunjin was quite possibly your favorite person you had met thus far, and you would have rather kept him as a friend than commit to a relationship the second month of school and risk losing him later down the road.

And boy, keep him as a friend you did. As it turned out, Hyunjin grew to be your truest, best friend in high school. Sure, you each had your own friend groups, but the two of you were the iconic pair everybody knew. But strictly platonic, despite the rumors and wishes that went around for the next four years. You like to think that neither of you ever developed feelings past what everyone feels toward their best friend— an innocent, wholesome sort of love.

But when had things changed? Hormones, as always, were definitely a big part of it. Hyunjin was always a cutie, but it wasn’t until he grew into his own skin and developed a newfound confidence did you start to see him differently. Until everyone saw him differently. Neither of you missed the way people stared him down, pupils dilating every time he ran his fingers through the black tufts of his hair, hearts aching for some sort of interaction. Or when you started attending parties, groups of girls would fling themselves at him in a blundering disarray, most of which he would turn down with a gentle dismissal that flew over their heads, too drunk to actually care.

But then there were times his dick made the decision for him, desperation and deprivation weighing in on him and you’d watch with a tight jaw as he’d leave the room with the pretty girl of the night skipping after him. You never realized it was only on those nights did you wind up in the back seat of Han Jisung’s car.

But even after the physical attraction sizzled out over time, things were not the same. Hyunjin wasn’t your hidden little treasure anymore. All eyes were set on him and it took more than a glass of water to swallow your jealousy. But why? Why were you so resentful all of a sudden?

It’s hard to share Hwang Hyunjin, you decided. Once established that you were his main hoe and he was yours, it became a significant burden watching others try and get in between. Not that they did it with a malicious attempt to separate you, but it still hurt. You’re selfish, and you admit it— Hyunjin, quite frankly, is the love of your life. Romantic or not, nothing could change your feelings toward him. It goes beyond his unfathomable beauty and spunky personality. Everything about him from his nose to his hands, to his distaste for onions and the way his face scrunches up when he lets out that giggle of his and even to the way he prefers to sleep against the wall but will force you to when you’re over so he can “protect you in case there’s a monster” all mount into this big, giant section of your heart set aside for Hyunjin.

So despite your efforts to ignore the pang of jealousy each time he would find a potential someone or the joy whenever he’d find his way back because “they kept wanting to hang out in the morning even though I said I don’t wake up before noon,” this Hyunjin-shaped hole in your heart seems to only grow the longer you ignore it. Kind of like every medical condition out there: the longer you ignore it, the worse it gets. So, basically Hyunjin is your heart disease.

Yikes. Sounds a lot worse when you try putting it into words.

Well, he won’t be your heart defect for long if he keeps ruining those pearly whites of his by only brushing once just before bed, you chuckle to yourself, rolling to your side at the sudden lack of oxygen between your face and the pillow. There’s a fleeting moment without thought when you unconsciously reach for your phone to check for any notifications before the fattest revelation of them all falls from the ceiling and smacks you right upside the face.

Shit. Looks like you’ve gone right ahead and totally dissected each and every fiber of your feelings for Hyunjin.

Blinking up at the ceiling, the weight of your emotions isn’t as heavy as you expected them to be. Instead, it’s more of a breath of fresh air, as if you have finally accepted the way things fell instead of ignoring them. Your feelings for Hyunjin have always been there. It just took a little effort to get them out.

Nevertheless, it is going to be difficult hanging out with him in a few hours with your exposed emotions still needing to be processed. Especially when he will pull you to his side and keep you nestled there the entire night. Rubbing your temples, you realize it will take some serious self-control to put everything on the back burner and just enjoy the time spent with Hyunjin.

Sighing, you check the time on your phone again. 3:21 and a text from Hyunjin asking if you could bring green tea.

“Mom!” You yell, defeated. “You were right!”

You used to think Hyunjin lived far away. Truthfully, he’s only fifteen minutes away if you go ten over the speed limit. But the only way to get to his house entails driving through the chaos of the mall and town center, which adds an extra ten minutes sitting through traffic no matter the time of day.

Now, Hyunjin’s college campus is two hours away. Well, technically five from you, since you’re almost three hours away in the opposite direction. So you’re lucky if you get to see him once a month with how hectic school becomes and how difficult it is trying to plan to come home the same weekend. Fortunately, it has worked out this semester. And while you should spend this time with your families, they know how much you crave one another’s company as the weeks drag on. The twenty-two minutes it takes getting to each other’s homes is totally worth it.

You expect Hyunjin to tell you to use the key hidden underneath the resin meditating frog statue in the front garden to unlock the front door when you text him you have arrived, but to your utmost surprise, he’s there, awake, to open the door for you.

“Stinky!” You yell, dropping your things on the floor to burry yourself in his embrace, standing on your tippy toes to wrap your arms around his neck in order to really get the full experience of hugging your favorite giant. “Poopy!” He shouts in return, long arms winding tightly around your waist and even going so far as to lift you up a few inches. God. Hate when he does that.

“Why are you up? I thought I’d have to let myself in with you sleeping all your problems away,” you ask, smiling gratefully when he bends down to pick up your bag. “I realized Kkami hadn’t been out all day, so I came down to let him out and find actual food,” Hyunjin explains as he makes way into the kitchen, opening the back door to let said dog back inside. “Aw, poor thing,” you pout, squatting to scratch at Kkami’s neck when he zooms faster than the speed of light to you, “does that mean you brushed your teeth?”

“I did, actually,” Hyunjin snorts right back, scrunching his nose at you before turning away to open the fridge. Sitting on the floor with Kkami in your lap, you take the opportunity to finally get a good look at Hyunjin now that he’s distracted. And of course, he looks good. Really good. Last time you saw him he still was a brunette, a look he rocked during the spring and summer months. This is the first time you’ve seen the freshly dyed black hair in person. Even though he always looks handsome, something about Hyunjin with black hair completely changes his aura. Brings back memories of how badly you wanted him in high school. You shiver at the thought.

And, to top it all off, how he manages to stay in such disgustingly good shape despite his atrocious eating habits never ceases to amaze you. Like, come on. The boy eats worse than a raccoon seven days out of the week, lives off boba, works out maybe five times a month, dances in his free time and still keeps his body in tiptop shape. God, you hate him. His pediatrician probably hates him, too. You even go as far as to sniff the fries in your dining hall and you gain five pounds.

Even now, he looks unnecessarily regal in the baggy material of his sweatpants and flannel. And the warmth of his kitchen’s ambient lighting does nothing to suppress the heavy thumping of your heart. So casual is his dress, yet how immaculate he looks rummaging the cabinets for a snack.

“Are you hungry?” He asks, the familiar softness of his voice shaking you from your daze as he closes the refrigerator door after his unsuccessful search. Here’s the thing: you really aren’t hungry, but Hyunjin clearly is, so if you say no then all he will be thinking about is food until you decide that you are hungry. “Yeah,” is what you say, nudging Kkami off your crossed legs to stand, “I brought green tea and a few snacks, but we could order Chinese food or something. The place near Dunkin’ and the gas station makes bubble tea now, too.”

Hyunjin’s brows shoot up, flashing his boxy smile. “Is it good?”

“I mean, I’ve only had their pork dumplings and mango tea before, and it was pretty good. I don’t know about their noodles or anything, though,” you shrug, moving to stand beside him at the kitchen island. Distracted by Kkami trying to jump onto the sofa in the living room, you don’t look to Hyunjin until the poor dog is successful in doing so. Startled to find him already gazing down at you, your heart truly is not prepared for him to go right ahead and wrap his arms around your waist, resting his chin on your shoulder. Totally not freaking out or trying to overthink his need to constantly cling, you justify his actions by quickly recalling the time he said, “My head is too godtdamn big for my godtdamn body.” More like his head is too heavy because instead of a brain it’s just a chunk of cement up there. He just needs to rest his head sometimes.

Yeah.

“Mm, I don’t know,” Hyunjin hums, swaying your body with his to an unheard tune. By now, any coherent thought has dissipated into thin air and all you can do is melt against him. “Why?” You manage.

“’Cus if we order anything that means I’ll have to get up and get it.”

“Oh my God, Hyunjin, really?” You laugh. Your hands naturally glide to where his are linked at your stomach, pressing to interlock your fingers overtop his. “If that’s the only reason for your uncertainty than I could always come get it, idiot.”

“No! It’s okay,” Hyunjin says, jumping back before you can even process it, “I’m not that hungry anyway.”

“Ohhh ‘kay,” you laugh breathlessly, whiplashed by the whole thing. Good thing you aren’t hungry, because when was the last time Hyunjin turned down food? Blinking at him precariously, he doesn’t seem to notice until one too many seconds of silence pass by.

“C’mon,” he demands excitedly, jumping back into reality, “my roommate told me to watch this anime called Soul Eater but I wanted to watch it with you.” Once again, before anything can even register past every single That Was Cute™ alarm ringing in your brain, Hyunjin is grabbing your bag and reaching for your hand, leading you out of the kitchen and upstairs.

You and Hyunjin binge aforementioned anime until he falls asleep first around 2 AM, only stopping to order food an hour in (he’s an indecisive man indeed), to get up to retrieve it, and to actually eat while catching up. For most of the night, you are able to forget the way his heartbeat against your back mirrored your own in the kitchen. But then, a little while after you fall asleep yourself, Hyunjin unconsciously shifts closer and you spend another hour blinking at his relaxed hand twitching against your abdomen, trying to keep the hurricane inside your heart at bay.

You can’t make it home October. Hyunjin texted you to let you know he was going to be the third weekend in, and you tried desperately to manage your time in order to make it work. But one group project in chem lead to another paper in psych and before you knew it, your roommate was listening to you sob over a boy and curse out your classes.

September left you emotionally wrecked, to be totally honest. You hate Hyunjin and you hate the way he makes you feel and you especially hate how realizing you have a crush on him makes you unsure if everything he does is his way of hinting he feels the same or if he’s always been this touchy and you are just now recognizing it. So, missing a month of seeing your favorite human being essentially means missing another day of trying to decipher which actions of his go in the Friend list, and which go in the Questionable list. And that, my friend, is unacceptable.

You absolutely cannot not go home this month. November is the calm before the storm (the storm being exams looming the second week of December), and while it would be beneficial maybe staying on campus to continue preparing, you tell yourself going home will be just as helpful. Mental breaks, and stuff. Totally not just to see Hyunjin.

Either way, Hyunjin asks you if you would join him on the seventeenth to go to his second cousin’s christening and you absolutely cannot say no when you know how bored Hyunjin gets at family events when they aren’t for him. And so, fast forward to the third Sunday of November and you are ready to pass out ten minutes after entering the church.

“I’m so happy for you two! I always knew you would last into college,” one of Hyunjin’s aunts exclaims, pinching your cheeks but the only pinch you feel is that of your heart.

Clearly she is misinformed, or just prone to jumping to conclusions but yet again, you can’t really blame her with how couple-y you and Hyunjin are. Past the single tunnel vision of your gaze, you watch her smile falter when Hyunjin goes rigid beside you and oh my God this is the most embarrassing moment of my life, his whole family thinks we’re dating and here we are still stuck in each other’s friendz—

“I’m glad you think so, imo,” Hyunjin suddenly picks up, sneaking an arm around to rest his hand on your hip, tugging you close, “I don’t know what I’ll do if she ever decides to leave me.”

It’s nice to think that he means it, to imagine that you are here not as a tag-along but to join him in a family ceremony because you are part of the family. The thought turns your blood to sugar and everything surrounding you falls apart; you listen to the rest of their conversation without processing it, the precise detailing in the marble pillars blurs into a mass of white, and you still feel his strong hold on the curve of your waist yet you are lost in the swam of possibilities.

How lovely it would be to live up to her assumption. To ‘last into college’ as a couple, not as best friends. To be able to call him yours even when you’re not together, to come home and kiss his lips, to sleep in his bed and it mean more than the laziness of blowing up the air mattress. At some point, he leads you into the third pew to sit beside his parents, and when you greet them with a hug all you can think about is them viewing you as more than their son’s friend.

God, you hate it.

You’re not as religious as Hyunjin and his family. But for the first time in years, you find yourself looking to the crucifix during the service and praying to whoever is up there to give you some strength and patience, because Lord do you need it.

Hyunjin is a funny guy.

Or so he thinks.

It’s not that he isn’t funny. It’s just— compared to your friends Minho or Changbin, he isn’t at the top of the list. When you think of Hyunjin, the first words that pop up are soft, loud, and dramatic.

It’s not that he isn’t funny. He’s just weird.

Insanely, ridiculously weird. For example, the time he called Jeongin a vitamin. Or the time he slapped half a bottle of sunscreen on his face. Or his random bouts of dancing at inappropriate moments. Just to name a few.

After the Baptism, Hyunjin acted like nothing happened. Didn’t even bring it up. Not even a joke. After the ceremony, you joined his family for a luncheon, which just involved the two of you being weird and making peculiar dancing videos on SnapChat with the swirly filter and complaining about school for a few hours until he drove you home. Obviously you stopped for food again on the way.

But that was it. Things went on as normal, and you returned to campus later that night and forced the whole experience to the back of your brain. It was officially grind season, and grind season meant studying for exams. No parties. No boys. And certainly no Hyunjin.

You both were home for winter break in the blink of an eye. And in normal Hyunjin style, he sort of vanished for the first week. Probably catching up on his strict sleeping schedule, you presumed, and accepted the fact that it was going to be a few days before you saw or even heard from him. The only anticipation you felt was wanting to give him his Christmas gift.

After what seems like an eternity away from Hyunjin, you get out of the shower on this fine Saturday before Christmas to find a slew of texts from him.

[5:52 PM] big tiddy jinny🍯🧸🌟🖇: Aloha mamacita

[5:52 PM] big tiddy jinny🍯🧸🌟🖇: How do u feel about getting froyo tn

[5:52 PM] big tiddy jinny🍯🧸🌟🖇: We can get fat and then u can sleepover aaaand

[5:52 PM] big tiddy jinny🍯🧸🌟🖇: We can stare at the wall for a few hours

[5:52 PM] big tiddy jinny🍯🧸🌟🖇: And

[5:53 PM] big tiddy jinny🍯🧸🌟🖇: *cough*

[5:53 PM] big tiddy jinny🍯🧸🌟🖇: Exchange Jesus gifts

See? Weird. Who wants froyo when it’s thirty degrees out?

[5:53 PM] YN: “aloha mamacita”

[5:53 PM] YN: uHmmmMMM

[5:53 PM] YN: im down mr president

[5:54 PM] YN: why do u want ice cream in winter tho. don’t u want like

[5:54 PM] YN: hot chocolate or seomthing

Obviously not. Two hours later, Hyunjin arrives to pick you up for froyo despite all your efforts in convincing him maybe you could take the train to the city and watch a light show, or simply drive around and swoon over the rich people houses and their Christmas decorations. He didn’t budge. This leads you to your second question of the day: why is it that when you threw on sweats for the occasion you called yourself a hag, but upon entering Hyunjin’s car you make a mental note of how hot he looks when he’s wearing the same exact thing? You groan at the thought. It’s because it’s Hyunjin, of course.

“Bonjour, mademoiselle,” he greets, flicking your forehead once you settle into the seat of his Subaru WRX because he’s a hotshot and likes to flex that he can drive a manual. Not really— the car is absolute garbage by now, having been his Dad’s old car (his Dad likes to flex too, apparently). However, Hyunjin takes care of it enough for it to seem five years old instead of ten, and, either way, watching him work the stick shift is unexplainably hot.

You swat his hand away. “Drive, bitch,” you huff, twisting to buckle yourself in. Once he’s reversed out of your driveway, you glance back to find him fighting against a devilish smirk.

“So,” you start once he has navigated out of your neighborhood. His brow twitches up. “Are you taking Hawaiian and French at school? You’ve been throwing quite a lot of languages at me recently.” Hyunjin shoots you an unamused look. You return it with a wrinkle of your nose.

“Anyway,” he ignores your teasing, pausing to switch gears for whatever reason so he can make it through a yellow light, “how did your exams go?”

“Well, you know…” You trail off, looking to your window. It feels a lot later than eight o’clock. With it getting dark so early in the evening nowadays, it feels as if nighttime is always following you.

“You know… what?” Hyunjin interrupts your daze, concern laced in his voice. “They were fine. I passed everything, I’m just worried about my major,” you explain sadly, barely glancing at him before you are turning back to the window to stare at the moon. Must be nice being a moon. Just get to hang out in the sky watching everyone and being watched.

“I mean, if you want to switch, now’s the time. Better do it now before the second semester,” Hyunjin advises, wise as always. Not really, but he’s right. “What are you thinking of going into?”

Yikes. He’s going to kill you.

“Nursing,” you blurt.

“Oh my Lanta, ___, are you serious?” He groans, stopping at a convenient red light presenting the perfect opportunity for him to smack his forehead on the wheel. Dramatic. “How are you gonna manage that? You’ll practically be two years behind everyone else!”

“I know,” you sigh, throwing your head back on the headrest, “that’s the problem. Bio just isn’t doing it for me. I don’t think I can spend the rest of my life in a lab watching mitosis. I need something more rewarding, so theoretically nursing is a perfect start. I don’t know, though.”

“Why don’t you switch to interior design or something? We could get our own HGTV show, ___,” he says, but you don’t meet his gaze when he glances over because beneath his words, you can sense some serious hopefulness. Interior design would be cool, but you’ve never considered that as a career choice. You once helped your parents pick out everything when they redid a bathroom at home and that turned out great, but as a major?

“I don’t know, man. I’ll have to talk to my counselor about it, I guess,” you shrug, pulling the hood of your sweatshirt over your head and tightening the drawstrings until the material covers your eyes, “why can’t you audition to be a K-pop star or something? I could be your manager. Heck, even your makeup artist. I’ve done your makeup before, remember?”

Hyunjin laughs, loud, and the sound sinks deep into your heart and makes you feel warm all over. Stress? Gone.

For the next few minutes or so, the ride is comfortably quiet. At some point, he turns on the radio and Mariah Carey’s “All I Want For Christmas Is You” floods your brain and reminds you to look forward to exchanging Christmas gifts later. God, you hope he likes it. You really went out on the sentimental gifts this year.

Hood shielding your vision, you jump when his large hand suddenly comes to grab the top of your head, squeezing hard and you imagine he’s trying to press some hopefulness into your brain. “Hand on the penis stick, Hwang,” you bark, blindly reaching for his own head across the way and pulling his ear when you do so. Good Lord, you hope no one can see into the car because… what.

Hyunjin lets out a giggle this time, reaching to pull you into a headlock and even though he’s got your head shoved up against his sturdy chest and goes on to give you a noogie, you’re stuck being all high and loopy on the sound of his happiness. And hey, it’s nice to know you’re the cause of it.

“We’re literally parked, idiot. If you had your hood down you would’ve realized,” Hyunjin snickers, releasing you after watching you struggle for a few seconds. Jerking away from him, you swiftly pull back your hood. “Oh,” you laugh, reading the flashy Yogo Factory sign above the building in front of you, “you could’ve just told me instead of watching me bask in misery.”

Hyunjin suitably ignores your moaning and groaning by getting out of the car and standing in front of the car, illuminated by the headlights. Why? Why must he look so scrumptious in his black hoodie and grey sweatpants and four-year-old white Nike sneakers? He has no gosh darn right!

After fixing the mess he made of your hair, you at last join him outside the car, shooting him another glare and moving ahead of him to open the shop’s door without waiting for him. “From now on, we have to start texting each other what we’re wearing before we go out, ‘cus this looks a little ri-donk-ulous,” Hyunjin whispers in your ear as you make your way to the cup selection, trying to ignore all the stares you— no, he is getting along the way.

“What do you mean?” You ask, plucking two medium sized cups up before turning to look at him. Then you look down at yourself. Oh. Looks like you’re both wearing the hoodie from junior spirit week. “Nice.” Just Couple Things™!

Back to Hyunjin being weird— why did he drag you all the way out here just to get a cup of chocolate frozen yogurt and maybe half a scoop of peanut butter chips?

Meanwhile, he watches in absolute disgust as you blow through your own dessert. Vanilla yogurt with probably every topping offered because you physically cannot make a decision, especially when they have chunks of cookie dough up there.

“So,” Hyunjin starts, trying not to look you in the eye considering you look like a goblin shoveling globs of diabetes down your throat, “have you talked to Jisung recently?”

You choke on a Fruity Pebble at his inquiry, prompting him to reach across the table and slap your back a few times until your esophagus is cleared. “Ugh,” clearing your throat one last time, you take a few sips of water while shooting him a glare. Jisung? Really? “How dense are you?” You hiss unintentionally.

Hyunjin raises his hands in defense. “Just a question.”

Yeah, just a question. Dumbass. “I mean,” you laugh awkwardly, “not really. We have a streak on Snap and sometimes we’ll talk occasionally but I don’t text him every day or anything. How about you?”

He shrugs, concentrating instead on stirring his yogurt into a goopy mess. “Eh. We still use our group chat a lot but that’s it. He’s too busy making music in Malaysia.”

You chuckle at this, picking out the boba from your own cup and leaving the rest now that it has started to look like something sold at the Chum Bucket. “That sucks,” you offer, not the best at giving him consolidation, you opt for linking your feet around his own in some weird act of intimacy, “isn’t he coming home for the holidays, though? I’m sure you can all have a reunion soon.”

“Yeah, he is,” Hyunjin hums, suddenly too focused on trying to escape your trap under the table. Annoyed Hyunjin is cute. “Stoooop,” he whines, kicking at your shins before breaking into boisterous laughter at your relentlessness, “I will not hesitate to throw this cup at your face.”

“Yeah, right,” you scoff, “I’d like to see you try.”

At this, Hyunjin drops his stupidly long arms beneath the table and easily captures your foot by the ankle, pulling hard enough for you to slip down your side of the booth. “Hyunjin!” You shriek, panicking slightly at your sweaty hand’s insecure grip against the leather. You’re going to fall. You’re going to fall flat on your ass underneath a table at a frozen yogurt place because the boy you like pulled your foot too hard. Fantastic. Ignoring you, he starts to wiggle your shoe off your foot no matter how hard you try to squirm out of his relentless grip. “Stop trying to eat my toes in the middle of Yogo!”

Finally, he releases your foot, letting it fall limp against his thigh.

“God,” you huff, breathless as you squirm back up your seat, cheeks burning ferociously, “you are such an ass.”

Behind the playful smirk he fails to hide, something darker glints in Hyunjin’s eyes and it makes your heart skip a beat. Then, “We should go.” The suggestion makes the heat of your blush scorch even hotter down your neck and you instinctively turn away, only to find the customers on the other side of the shop watching you with just as perturbed looks. Fantastic, part two.

“Okie,” you squeak out, blinking after him in complete and total bewilderment as to what just happened when he gets up to throw his trash away. Whatever. Following after him, you too toss your cup out before quickly finding your hand engulfed by his larger one as he leads you back outside, the sudden sharpness of the cold air bringing tears to your eyes. You desperately want to ask him what that was about, or why he’s acting so sneaky, but you stay silent, too afraid your voice will come out shaky and vulnerable. Instead, you let him tug you into his side and try to keep up with him no matter how badly your knees threaten to buckle with each glance you sneak up at him.

It’s silent when you enter the car, watching warily as he reverses out of the parking spot and maneuvers through the lot. Your heart rate seemingly cannot slow itself down, adrenaline taking the place of oxygen the longer you stare at him, at the concentrated scrunch to his face, at the cute tip of his button nose and at the swell of his lips and you distantly wonder what would happen if you pulled him into a kiss at the next red light.

In the midst of your daydream Hyunjin clears his throat, bringing you back to reality and you realize with a startle that he has caught you. Jesus Christ! What has gotten into you? You mentally smack yourself upside the head, instantly turning away from his cocky little gaze and staring straight ahead in search of something else to focus on. “___,” he sing-songs, slow and sensual and entirely demolishing the walls you have built around yourself. It is at this red light you wish to simply open the door and run.

“Yes?” You manage, wincing at how small your voice sounds and while looking out his window instead of into his eyes, you notice him grip the steering wheel hard enough to turn his knuckles white. The tension is insurmountable, weighing in heavily on your chest and you desperately wish to arrive home, even though that means having to survive the next twelve hours with him. Anything is better than the small confines of his car.

“What do you want to do when we get home?” He asks, cool as a cucumber. You pale. It is a dangerous question and you do not know if he realizes that. “Um,” you cough, scooting to sit up straight, “whatever you want.” You whisper the last part, genuinely petrified because you have absolutely no idea if your brain is twisting everything to make it seem like Hyunjin is flirting or if things are totally normal. No idea.

“Hm,” he offers, tilting his head in thought, “we shall see.”

Yeah. We shall.

The rest of the ride is quiet, comfortably or uncomfortably you cannot say because you are too busy trying to calm the Spongebob burning office scene occurring inside your own head, hopelessly telling yourself that everything is fine, Hyunjin’s fine, you’re fine. Just pretend like nothing happened, you tell yourself when Hyunjin pulls into his driveway with practiced ease. “Ugh,” he groans after retrieving your bag from the back seat, and you watch with a raised brow as he skips up to his porch, yelling, “I have to pee!”

“Begone with you, piss boy,” you tease, holding the screen door open for him as he struggles to unlock the storm door and pulling on one of his hoodie’s drawstrings just to annoy him. “Stop,” he growls, low and playful but nevertheless sending a swarm of butterflies to your tummy. You ignore him. Finally unlocking the door, Hyunjin shoves the keys into his pocket and seizes your wrist, yanking your arm down with enough force to nearly topple you into him. “Why are you being so annoying tonight?” He frowns at you, nose and brows scrunched in irritation and it is only because of his proximity do you finally soften up.

“Sorry,” you pout back, bringing your other hand up to boop his nose, “I just missed ya.”

“Ew,” he snorts, stepping past the threshold and kicking off his shoes. You follow suit, closing the door behind you and clicking the lock into place as Kkami comes sprinting over. “B-R-B,” Hyunjin announces, presumably bouncing away to the bathroom.

“Oh, boy,” you huff, squatting to pick up the fluffy little dog and hugging him close to your chest, “your dad is making my life very difficult.” Pressing a quick kiss to the top of his head, you put Kkami back down and grab your bag before heading upstairs, knowing Hyunjin is going to take his grand old time and probably take a shit while he’s at it. Plus, you’re impatient and dying to take your bra off.

Aside from what light his Gudetama nightlight offers, Hyunjin’s room is ultimately left dark. Here’s the thing: he used to have a lamp on his dresser, but then he took it with him to college and only brings it home for summer because he’s lazy and sleeps the majority of the time he’s home, anyway. Instead, he put up his little remote-controlled Christmas tree in addition to the lava lamp he has beside his bed. Perfect. For Hyunjin, at least.

Switching both of these on, their subtle glow offers just enough to keep you from banging your toe against something. It’s happened one too many times. Hyunjin’s room isn’t messy— he really isn’t a messy person to begin with, but he will reorganize the furniture in his room fifty times a year and you never know where the crooked leg to his bedside table will be to ambush your pinky toe.

Setting your bag onto his bed, you excitedly fumble past all your layers and unclasp your bra, maneuvering out of it with a delighted exhale just as Hyunjin begins his ascent up the stairs, steps creaking loudly under his heavy trudging. “I’m an idiot,” he grumbles, leaning against the doorframe to catch his breath.

You don’t bother to look at him, opting to quickly retort instead, “We been knew.”

“Ugh,” Hyunjin groans, exasperated, and you finally turn to him after successfully jamming aforementioned undergarment into your bag, “anyways. I don’t know why I didn’t just come up here, because I have to wash my face anyway and you do too and now we’re both going to have to share a sink.”

“Aw,” you coo, tone dripping with sarcasm as you pat his arm, “poor baby has to share the bathroom.”

“I’m actually going to strangle you,” he sighs, nevertheless following after you into the bathroom.

“Kinky.”

Hyunjin glares, unamused as he opens a drawer for his pink bow hairband and your striped pink and blue one that he bought for you, but keeps here for sleepovers. Yeah. He throws it to your face. “Sorry,” you offer, pulling the soft headband up to hold your hair back, “I’ll try to stop. I’m just so used to annoying you.”

“Clearly,” he scoffs, flashing his stupidly cute teasing smile and in your head, you imagine raising a white flag in surrender— he’s got you, he’s won, it’s over. Time to call it quits and head home. Evidently shut up (for now), you offer him a roll of your eyes before turning on the sink to wet your hands before pumping out some of his scrumptious watermelon face wash. Maybe if you scrub hard enough, you’ll manage to rinse away all the overwhelming thoughts of the night, too.

Barefaced Hyunjin is immaculate. Well, Hyunjin is immaculate twenty-four hours out of the day, but barefaced, freshly washed, hair messy, ready for bed Hyunjin is immaculate, and you are one of the few people lucky enough to see this eighth wonder of the world as often as you do.

Now, maybe it has something to do with the unexpected ambiance the light from his laptop, Christmas lights, and lava lamp have created together that makes him look so unfairly beautiful at this given moment. Or, you’re just insanely pussywhipped and looking for an excuse. You try not to think about it.

“Why are you so squirmy tonight?” He asks, frustrated enough to interrupt Kermit singing ‘Shawty I don’t mind’ playing from his laptop. “I’m not,” you defend, a weak argument indeed, given that you have just finished adjusting your position beside him for the umpteenth time.

“I mean, four female Ghostbusters? The feminists are taking over! I’m an ad—”

“___, you’ve touched my dick like four times. Don’t try and tell me you’re not squirmy. What’s wrong?” Hyunjin interrupts a second Vine, and even goes on to talk over ‘I have the power of God and anime on my side!’ like a lunatic. Oh Christ, you have? Surely you would have noticed. “Sorry,” you mumble, embarrassed as you bury your face into the curve of his pectoral and instinctively move your leg settled between his away, “I’m just hot, to be honest.” Technically, it is not a lie. Hyunjin’s family definitely keeps their thermostat at a higher temperature than yours and you always manage to sweat your ass off every time you come over. This time, however, you are certain it has more to do with the assault your heart is facing rather than your sweat glands.

At the sound of his tap against the spacebar to pause the video, you wordlessly and reluctantly sit up from your comfortable spot beside him in order to rid yourself of your heavy sweatshirt. Now, here lies the problem. Sweatshirt: off. Nipples: out. Realistically, Hyunjin has seen your boobs a number of times over the past few years, and even if he hadn’t, he probably wouldn’t even bat an eye. But right now, your heart is on the line, you’re embarrassed and you’re trying to play it extremely safe.

You toss the hoodie to the floor and nestle right back where you were anyway, slinging your right arm over his torso and ignoring his sharp intake of breath when you snuggle closer. “Better?” He asks, voice strained and it literally makes you nauseous. “Yep.”

He resumes the video. You had started early in the night watching Pom Poko, which unsurprisingly ended with the two of you crying at the bittersweet ending, then moved to TikTok compilations on YouTube to cheer up before moving on from them and onto the classic Vine compilations. You paid good attention for the most part, chuckling along with him to ‘What up, I’m Jared, I’m nineteen and I never fucking learned how to read,’ ‘Bruh chill, I don’t know why you in a big time rush,’ and all the other absolute comedic masterpieces. But after the fourth or fifth video of the same six second clips with an occasional rare one, you began to grow bored and decided to do what you do best: admire Hyunjin.

Sure, ‘Come get yo juice!’ followed by the loud smash of the oven made you smile, but you found the flashing lights casting shadows beneath Hyunjin’s eyes and lips much more fascinating. Of course, this is not the first time you have been held so close to him. But it is, however, all too easy to get lost in the sight of him and you’ve noticed recently that you are in desperate need of a map. Whether it’s due to your time away from him or simply an appreciation for untouched beauty you do not know.

Even now, your gaze flickers to his laptop once you hear ‘Get to Del Taco,’ but having already watched it five thousand times you tilt your head upward to catch Hyunjin’s silent giggle at ‘free-sha-voca-do.’ It’s a vicious cycle, really, going back and forth between wanting to simply enjoy the night and realizing enjoying the night lies totally in Hyunjin’s presence. And so, you continue to fall into this trap each time until you pay no mind to the videos at all, basking in the brilliance of Hyunjin’s joyous smile and the warmth his happiness makes you feel. It is this thought that slowly tugs you to sleep, a fight to keep your heavy eyelids open lost until finally, you give in to the comfort and allow yourself to drift off to the sound of ‘Step the fuck up, Kyle.’

You think you are dreaming.

You think.

“___,” the softness of Hyunjin’s voice at the crown of your head eases you from the clutches of sleep and you stretch your locked limbs before curling further into his side. “We didn’t open presents.” Even though you can’t see him, you can hear his pout, and you realize you must be awake to hear the disappointed words caught sluggishly between his lips so vividly. You hum, hesitant to open your eyes because you really want to go back to sleep. Just for a little while. And so, you ask, “What time is it?”

“Just past two,” he whispers.

You hum again, trying to formulate a sensible sentence in the parts of your brain still asleep, “We can… wake up at four. And open gifts. Okay?”

“Okay, weirdo,” Hyunjin chuckles to himself, sliding lower down the mattress after shutting his laptop.

You think you are dreaming.

You think.

You can’t remember ever falling asleep facing each other. But yet again, your brain is clouded beyond capability and now, you know for certain you are dreaming. Hyunjin never faces you.

Blinking slowly, it takes a few seconds for your eyes to adjust to the impenetrable darkness and you struggle to make out the features of Hyunjin’s face. You know you are dreaming, and so you tug him closer, throwing a leg over his thigh and an arm over his waist. Even in your sleep, you feel the sadness pricking at your heart, for even it knows this is only what dreams are made of. You like to make the best of it.

“You know I love you, Jinnie, right?” Your voice comes out funny, drawn out and mumbled like your tongue is numb and you fight the urge to feel for yourself.

“Of course I do. I love you too.” His reply surprises you. You thought he was asleep and, either way, hearing such fond words from him puts your heart at ease. He must be misunderstood.

“No. I mean like… I like you, love you. Like I want to kiss you… kiss you good morning and before bed love you. Send you hearts and take stupid couple pics and… go on dumb dates love you. You know?” Your words feel garbled and incomprehensible the longer you go on, trying to express how you feel when nothing is real proving to be increasingly difficult. God, if only you could do it when things are real.

You start to feel yourself slipping as he mutters a reply, mind in free fall and fuck, fuck, fuck, he’s whispering and you can’t hear him but you are too tired and helpless to wake yourself up to hear it. No, too lost in the next dream to go back. You can’t tell what is real and what isn’t. Christ, were you awake? You can’t tell. All you know is that you are warm, so, so warm and letting sleep take over you once more is the best answer to all your questions.

Hyunjin always says he hates waking people up. Because he’s normally the one needing to be awoken, whenever the roles are swapped he doesn’t know what he’s supposed to do.

This time, however, he takes it upon himself to repeatedly smack your face with his pillow. Not a fun experience when it’s coming from someone who fails to recognize his own strength. “Jesus, fuck! Okay!” You hiss, the cloud of sleep abruptly ripped away from you with the slap of his pillow against your skin. Arms raised defensively in front of you, you catch his next swing and tear the pillow out of his grasp to shield yourself all before you have even opened your eyes. When you do so, with the blatant intention just to find where he is and hurl the pillow at him, you are met with the harsh light from his ceiling fan and have to squint past the stinging white light to see his shit-eating grin.

“Was that necessary?” You groan, undeniably annoyed and wanting to glare at him more but needing to rub the ache out of your eyes. “Yes,” is all he says, reaching for your bag and catapulting it to you. He is incredibly lucky you are quick enough to catch it before it thumps against your head. What has gotten into him? Did he eat an entire bag of Pixy Stix while you were asleep? You watch, still dazed from sleep and reeling from the whole pillow smacking attack, as he flings open his closet door and turns back around with two neatly wrapped boxes. You squint to make out the dancing Santa T-rex wrapping paper.

“Oh,” you chirp, understanding, and you unzip your bag to retrieve the large box taking up the majority of space, “thanks for waking me up. I’m surprised you remembered. Did you stay up?”

A rosy blush burns its way across his cheekbones. Odd. “I, um— yeah. No, actually,” he stutters, really odd, given he was bouncing off the walls not even thirty seconds ago, “I set an alarm. You made me sleepy.” Hyunjin sits beside you once you have scooted over, leaning against the wall and crossing his long ass legs. He keeps his eyes trained on the boxes in his hands. “Oh,” you hum, looking to your own gift and suddenly wishing for the mattress to swallow you up, “sorry. I haven’t gotten as much sleep as you on break so far.”

“I don’t think anyone ever has,” he jokes and you finally look to him, sharing a cheeky smile before he gets all shy again, tongue darting out to wet his lips, “um, Merry Christmas, ___.”

It’s a simple phrase, but it makes your heart swell. “Merry Christmas to you too, Hyunjin.” Leaning over, you wrap your arms around his shoulders in an awkward side hug, but still end up feeling all drunk and loopy on love when he eagerly returns the gesture, arms curling around you.

“Okay,” you huff, sitting back, “me first.” You dramatically hold your gift out to him, jittery and nervous all over. Buying for Hyunjin is always hard. He’s just so easy to please, but when you want to do more than just please him it’s a constant battle trying to decide how far out you are going to go for him each year.

You watch impatiently as he tears the wrapping paper open first, and then finally lifts the flaps of the box up. “Aw,” he whimpers, pulling out the quokka plushie and attached certificate, “you adopted a quokka for me?”

You grin when he hugs the soft stuffed animal to his chest, the weight on your shoulders partly lifted from his positive reaction. He reaches back into the box, brow scrunched in thought as he regards the framed picture. “The First Day…?” Hyunjin asks, perplexed as he reads the title above the constellation poster. You scoot closer, leaning over to look it over once more. “This was the constellation of stars on our first day of freshman year. The day we first met.”

“Oh,” Hyunjin sniffs, “that’s really awesome, ___. Thank you. This is coming with me to school.” At this, he hugs you again, probably to hide the tears you know are threatening to spill because Hyunjin is Baby and cries every year. “Anything for my favorite fake Aussie,” you smile, leaning your head on his shoulder as he reads through the quokka adoption letter.

“Okay! Your turn!” He exclaims, setting his gifts back into the box and passing you the smaller one of his. He catches your curious glance to the second one he keeps by his side. “We have to open this one together.”

“Christ, okay. Looks like I’m gonna be crying tonight, too,” you sigh sadly. “Ooh,” jumping ahead of yourself, you wiggle your eyebrows at the white box before you, “Hyunjin if you bought me a Fitbit… I swear to God. How many times have I said I am not working out with you?” However, once you finish tearing open the wrapping paper you find it is not, in fact, a Fitbit.

“It’s not a Fitbit, idiot,” Hyunjin scoffs a second too late, waiting for you to slip the lid off the box. “They’re bond touch bracelets.”

“Explain,” you murmur, enamored but confused at the two little house arrest looking bracelets.

“So basically, we each wear one,” Hyunjin starts, taking one of the bracelets out and a burst of color blooms across its small screen at the motion, “and if you touch it, mine vibrates and I ‘feel’ your touch.” As he explains, he buckles it around your wrist, twisting it so it lies correctly. You silently take the second one and help it on him, brain too caught up to actually say anything.

“Try it,” Hyunjin whispers, suppressing his excitement.

You gingerly bring a finger to the little screen, tapping it once, twice. Nothing happens. Frowning, you try again, tapping and holding, then a second time, and finally— a strip of pink light appears and the bracelet gently vibrates as you tap and hold a random pattern. In response, the bracelet on Hyunjin’s wrist lights up blue, buzzing in the same pattern.

“Oh, Hyunjin,” you sniffle, fighting back your own tears because you refuse to let yourself ugly cry in front of him, “this is amazing. Now I can annoy you year-round. Thank you so, so much. I love you so much.” He hums, pulling you close when you turn to give him a proper hug. To your utmost surprise, however, instead of letting go he curls one fist into your side and helps swing your legs over to straddle his lap. “Oh.”

“___,” Hyunjin sighs thoughtfully, fingers playing with the sleeves of your tee, “I love you, too.”

You nearly spit up your coffee. If you were drinking coffee. Instead, you’re left with a dry mouth and a slack jaw at his words. Huh?

Glancing to the constellation picture peeking out of his box, and then to the matching bracelets you both wear, you find your mind reeling trying to make sense of it all. Yeah, you say the forbidden L-word to each another all the time, but most certainly not with you on his on lap and his lips mere centimeters away. The answer is so obviously clear as day you have trouble believing it.

“Fuck,” you laugh all of a sudden, as soon as the realization hits you, “I wasn’t dreaming, was I?”

Hyunjin lets out a joyous giggle, hands linking behind your back. Unable to hide his smile any longer, he clarifies, “You were not, madam. We literally just finished talking about when we were going to open gifts and then I got ready to sleep. Two seconds later you dumped your heart out to me, but when I answered, you were asleep.”

“Bruh,” you wince, hiding your face with your hands, “I am so sorry you had to deal with that.”

“No, don’t be,” Hyunjin comforts, reaching to tug your hands away. Your gut does somersaults when he intertwines his fingers with yours. “I was actually, uh, planning on doing some sort of confession to you anyway, but then you went right ahead and did it for me. So thanks for that.”

“Wow,” you chuckle, trying to wrap your mind around it all, “does that mean you, ahem, perhaps like me too?”

“No, I just got us really couple-y long distance relationship bracelets, pulled you onto my lap, and kissed you because I just want to be friends.”

“You didn’t kiss m—”

The sly little fucker interrupts your retort by quickly dipping down to press a fat smooch to your lips, missing miserably and you don’t know if he did it on purpose but you quickly fix the problem, releasing his hands to cradle his jaw and tilt his head the right angle. Finally, finally you kiss him, breathing in the smell of him like some sort of aromatherapy and whimpering into his mouth when his tongue swipes against your own. It is like nothing you have ever experienced, the taste and feel of him making you tremble and igniting a burst of electricity through your veins. You could kiss him forever, you think, sucking on his plump bottom lip greedily until he finally pulls back, desperate for air or trying to reel himself in you can’t say.

“You have to open your other gift,” Hyunjin reminds, chest heaving, and your gaze follows his long fingers as they comb his hair away from his forehead. Automatically, as if kissing Hyunjin once grants you some kind of free pass to do the same, you brush a few stray strands away from his face before leaning back to admire him. “Stoooop. You can’t do that and not expect me to kiss you again. Open. Your. Gift.” Hyunjin whines, squishing your cheeks and turning your head away.

“Okay, don’t blame this on me,” you huff, reaching for the second box before jabbing a finger into his chest, “you, sir, need to stop being so beautiful for like, two seconds.”

He scoffs, helping you rip off the wrapping paper, “You’re the beautiful one here.”

“Ew,” you wrinkle your nose, most certainly not used to Hyunjin dishing out such compliments, “this is too Hallmark Christmas movie for me. Let me open my gift in peace, ugly.” This box, unlike the bracelets’, is simple cardboard and when you lift open the lid, a brown leather book looks back at you. “You remember Up?” He asks.

On the leather, it reads Our Adventure Book in mismatched colors. “Yeah,” you whisper, flipping open the cover to find two baby pictures glued on the paper, one of Hyunjin, and one of you. At the top, it’s labeled ‘Before Shit Went Down.’ You laugh.

On the next page, there are random photographs from middle school, and then finally each other’s eighth grade graduation portraits. Then, written at the top is ‘Here It Begins,’ followed by a selfie he randomly took with you a few weeks into school freshman year, and then some from homecoming. Silently flipping through the rest of the book, your tears flow freely now, touched beyond comparison at all the photographs and all the memories accompanying them. Some are from large events like prom, others from random moments you don’t even remember, but each and every one comes together to form a special mold fitting perfectly into that Hyunjin-shaped hole in your heart.

The last picture is from the christening last month. Of course, it isn’t one of the nicer photos his mom took of the two of you, but a SnapChat selfie with the flaming sunglasses filter. He’s mid-laugh and you’re pressing a kiss to his cheek. Funny thing is, you don’t even remember taking it.

The page next to it is blank, aside from what’s written at the top of the page. “Togetha Foreva,” you read aloud, voice choked up and God, you cannot fathom how gross you look right now. “What the fuck, man!” You sob, punching Hyunjin’s shoulder before wiping your nose and cheeks with the back of your hands. “I didn’t sign up for this cock and ball torture.”

Hyunjin laughs loudly at this, pulling you into a hug and giving you a few seconds to recover. “Hyunjin, this is like… seriously the best thing anyone has ever done for me, holy shit. God, you Pinterest son of a bitch, this is such a good idea,” you groan, flipping back through the pages and getting teary-eyed all over again, “I can’t express how much this means to me, Jinnie. Thank you, really.”

Flashing that toothy grin of his, Hyunjin tugs you to lie back down with him and tilts your head up to press a much more accurate kiss to your lips. “I meant what I said before, ___,” he murmurs, “I don’t know what to do without you, and I know we only get to see each other once a month but I can’t keep living as just friends. You’re so much more than that. And I hope all the pictures we add from now on will show this new chapter of our lives. If not, well, then I guess I’ll just burn the book.”

“Are you asking me to be Kkami’s official poop-picker-upper?”

“Yes. Wait— what? No!”

You break into a fit of laughter, only to be interrupted with him pinching your side and causing you to let out a yelp. “Hey!” You bark, jumping closer to him and away from his hand until, finally, you give in to your self-indulgence and go right on ahead in swinging a leg over his hips and pinning him beneath you.

“You ruined my serious love speech, ___,” Hyunjin pouts, face scrunched up at you.

“I’m sorry, baby, go on.”

You pause, blinking slowly at him. He blinks back, the silence in the air weighing in heavily as both of your two brain cells bounce around trying to figure out what did you just call him?

“Never mind,” Hyunjin says, voice a low rumble of thunder as he reaches for your hips and easily flips positions, “I think you’re on the same boat.”

You laugh, tilting your head back and eyeing him indignantly. Fuck, he looks unfairly delectable hovering above you.

“Okay, how many more times do I have to tell you I love you for you to formally ask me to be your girlfriend, stupid?” You scowl, bringing your hands to cradle his neck, thumbs brushing delicately against his jaw.

“Call me baby again and we’ll see about making that happen.”

You raise a brow, tugging his face closer by the chain of his necklace. “You’re lucky it’s Christmas, baby.”

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coghive · 2 years

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Matthew West Earns Fourth Back To Back #1 Song With “Me On Your Mind”

Matthew West tops both the Billboard Christian Airplay Chart and Mediabase U.S. Christian AC Music Chart with “Me On Your Mind.” Penned by West with Jeff Pardo and Anne Wilson, the poignant track, which has garnered over 12 million streams, marks the 12th number one song for West as an artist, his 24th top 10 hit as an artist and his 25th number one song as an artist and songwriter. It is also his fourth chart-topper in a row following “What If,” “The God Who Stays,” and “Truth Be Told.” Adding to the excitement, he is set to release a duet version featuring Anne Wilson on August 12. “I woke up to the news that “Me on Your Mind,” is #1 and I’m completely blown away,” shares West. “I am thankful for an amazing team at Provident Label Group, and specifically to Jeff Cruz, Charles Van Dyke and the amazing radio team who have championed one song after another and carried them to our radio friends across the country. I remember telling my wife the idea of this song about how God has us on his mind while we were on a walk one day. I was looking ahead as we walked down the road and didn’t hear much of a response from her. But when I turned to look at her, she had tears in her eyes and quietly said, “you need to write that song.” It was a rare moment when I could tell a song was going to be special even before it was finished. It’s exciting to see the song resonate in a similar way with so many people and I hope all who hear it will be powerfully reminded that no one is just a face in the crowd. We are known, seen, listened to, and loved by the God of all grace.” https://youtu.be/5sNbahy6UCc On August 21, the reigning K-Love Fan Awards Male Artist of the Year will bring his headlining show – “A Night of Worship at the Mother Church with Matthew West and Friends” to the historic Ryman Auditorium in Nashville, TN. Tickets are onsale here. The “well-rounded songwriter” (Billboard), is also set to take the stage at the Nashville Songwriter Awards on September 20 performing alongside artists such as Thomas Rhett, Walker Hayes, Babyface and more. The genre hitmaker is the reigning ASCAP Christian Songwriter of the Year, his fourth time with this honor in his career. In addition to his several RIAA Gold-certified and Platinum singles, fans can hear him on “The Matthew West Podcast” which just surpassed an impressive 2 million downloads and drops new episodes weekly under the “That Sounds Fun” network. The five-time Grammy® nominated artist is set to release his sixth book, “The God Who Stays” on September 6. For more information visit thegodwhostays.com. For tour dates and ticket information visit www.matthewwest.com/tour. Read the full article

#MatthewWest

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readyplayerhobi · 4 years

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Favourite Fics of 2019

So...I thought that I’d give you all a list of my favourite fanfic’s that I read in 2019! I’ll include the description that was given by the author and then give a brief commentary of my own! Please make sure to not only read the fic, but give it a like and reblog! Give it some of your own comments and too, and follow/tell the author!!

Authors - I’ve got some authors repeated so you might have more than one fic here!

Readers - ...there’s a lot of fics here lol

Welcome To The Underworld by @spookitokki

; Demon/Radio Show Host!Jungkook x Human!Reader

; Synopsis: In a dark little second-hand shop downtown, stuffed in an alleyway you only stumbled into because you were lost, you found a charming antique radio. When you turned it on, it began to play what would become your favorite radio show, “Welcome to the Underworld”

; My Thoughts: I rec’d this fic very recently but I still remember it well. Demon Jungkook is weirdly caring for her despite her being human and him being demon from the Underworld. The reader...well she has no sense of self-preservation honestly haha. I enjoyed everything about this; the smut, the world building, the characterisation and so much more!

Matters Of The Heart by @hobidreams

; Hoseok x Reader

; Synopsis: it seems not even the passage of half a decade can diminish the hold of Mr. Jung’s charms on your heart. but the rumors that welcome you home speak of his imminent marriage to an heiress, one who bests you in every infuriating, ‘ladylike’ fashion. just how, then, are you meant to interpret the undeniable sparks of desire in his eyes?

; My Thoughts: I maintain that I LOVE THIS FIC SO MUCH. I think it’s probably like...in my top list of fics all year. It’s just...amazing. The writing feels authentic to the era and the reader is a delightful rebel that we all love from Victorian eras after all. And of course...Mr Jung is just a ridiculously attractive man that I would like very much. Rain is apparently making a follow up drabble AND I AM EXCITED!

An Abundance of Scrunchies by @jhspetitegf

; Single Dad!Hoseok x Kindergarten Teacher!Reader

; Synopsis: ❝hoseok is a hot single dad and you’re the new kindergarten teacher that likes to piss him off❞

; My Thoughts: This series of drabbles has completely stolen my heart. Dae is adorable and the reader is delightful in how she loves her kids. And then there’s Hoseok, the grumpy businessman who’s incredibly rich yet adorably dotes on his daughter and doesn’t get mad at her. It’s just...fluffy and angsty softness. I love it so much, and the smut was...oof. I can’t wait to read more!

Polaris by @junghelioseok

; Hoseok x Reader

; Synopsis: somehow, someway, he always returns to you.

; My Thoughts: I MAINTAIN THAT I LOVE THIS FIC SO MUCH AHHH. It’s so unique and beautifully written, such a delight to read and I enjoy it every time I do. The mixing of the ages throughout the years and how Hoseok evidently has knowledge of their future together but doesn’t tell her. It’s so sweet and yet so organic how they come together. It could be weird and creepy given the difference in ages continuously but it’s not. He’s always a gentleman and it’s just...it’s just wonderful honestly.

Faded Love by @jamaisjoons

; Jimin x Reader

; Synopsis: he doesn’t need to say it. because you can feel your husband, park jimin, falling out of love with you.

; My Thoughts: Okay but like, I still feel the pain and sadness when I read this fic the first time :( the reader’s confusion and pain at being abandoned so thoughtlessly despite her efforts is so hard to read. I still hate Jimin for doing it, and I’m glad that he stopped and realised that he was making a mistake. But poor reader will never be able to fully trust him again and always be worried to some degree :(

Lost And Found 01: Tick Tock by @fortunexkookie

; Peter Pan!Hoseok x Captain Hook!Reader

; Synopsis: The only hope you had at ending your exile and earning your life back came in the form of an infuriating and uncatchable man: Hoseok. He seemed to love the endless game of cat-and-mouse you two played - so much, in fact, that you were unsure if you were the cat or the mouse. What he failed to realize was that there was a third player, and this one wasn’t after him. The Crocodile hunted you with an intensity that rivaled the way you chased Hoseok, but with one difference: the games he played were deadly.

; My Thoughts: Okay so like...a lot of my favourite fics ever this year have been Hoseok based. You’re not surprised, I know you’re not. But this fic is just...I cannot WAIT for the second and third parts of it. The world is so richly realised and the characters have such phenomenal characterisation and development in just this one chapter. It’s so...involving to read, you just get lost in it. It’s truly a beautiful work of art that I can’t wait to see how everything goes!

Jungle Park by @jimlingss

; Hoseok x Reader

; Synopsis: The equation is simple. Hoseok needs to hire someone. You need a job. Except like any actual equation, it’s not fucking simple at all! Not when you have to add the fact that he was forced to hire someone he doesn’t want in his office, he has little respect for your job in general, and oh yeah…once upon a time you might have—*CENSORED*.

; My Thoughts: I looooooved reading this fic. Jimlingsss is basically why I made Flower a once a week thing, because when I was reading Jungle Park, I was always SO EXCITED for Monday’s because it meant I got to read a new Jungle Park! It’s such a slow burn romance but it’s so delightful and rewarding watching this cold and moody lawyer warm up to his bright and bubbly HR person. And then you learn the backstory between them and...I just loved it all!

Magic and Mysteries by @jimlingss

; Jimin x Reader

; Synopsis: Everything’s okay….EVERYTHING’S OKAY, YOU’RE FINE. Look, you just have one tiny problem. It’s an itty-bitty issue. Not that big of a deal. So what if you don’t have a familiar and you’re about to take on the ENTIRE family business. Oh, you have a name to uphold? Everyone’s depending on you? Great. That’s just fantastic. But it’s fine. You’ll get your familiar and you’ll run the best damn potion shop the world has ever seen. Everything will be fine, right?

; My Thoughts: Again, another Jimlingsss story but honestly, they’re always golden. I particularly remember this fic because I read it when I was in Korea. It’s so delightful and fun, reminding me a lot of Kiki’s Delivery Service. Jimin is a little rascal but I love that he teases her because he genuinely cares. It’s all just a truly wonderful fic and story put together in one delightful package.

Love, Guaranteed by @gukyi

; Taehyung x Reader

; Synopsis: with the celestial ball quickly approaching, kim taehyung is horrified to find out that you, his best friend, are dateless. to remedy this, he initiates The Match Project, a matchmaking service designed to find the most optimal date. to you, it’s an opportunity to meet someone else so you can stop pining after your clueless best friend. to him, it’s an opportunity to finally, once and for all, tell you how he feels.

; My Thoughts: I do quite enjoy reading Hogwarts fics, and I particularly enjoying reading Hogwarts fics with BTS as students as long as there’s no smut in it. Gukyi’s Hogwarts series was such a delight to read and I remember reading this fic with a smile on my face. Wanting to scream at reader because POOR TAEHYUNG OBVIOUSLY LOVES YOU. Poor guy trying so hard despite everything :(

Lovers’ Fuck Rule by @prolixitae

; Jungkook x Reader x Hoseok

; Synopsis: jungkook is still new to your established relationship with hoseok, which means he needs a little help feeling competent sometimes. especially when it comes to sex. alternatively, the span of a poly relationship over inaccurate amounts of fucking.

; My Thoughts: Okay look, I don’t do shipping or anything but Junghope is one of the best friendships/combinations there is. And this fic encapsulates why. Jungkook is so nervous with her whereas Hoseok is just...so unbelievably calm and dominant about it all. He knows exactly what gets his girl off and it’s sweet how amused he is by Jungkook. You can feel the slight insecurity almost off Jungkook because Hoseok has been with her for years but you can also feel the genuine love the reader has for him, along with the friendship Hoseok obviously has too. I really enjoyed it all!

Get Wet by @prolixitae

; Hoseok x Reader

; Synopsis: sitting in on your boyfriend’s dance practice is probably your biggest kink. it’s also the reason you asked to be so shamelessly fucked in the locker rooms of his dance studio, in spite of the pending consequences. note: this is not an idol-verse fic

; My Thoughts: You know I love Hoseok, and this smut was just...oh my god wow. Bizarrely, I explicitly remember reading it while in the cinema waiting for a film to start haha. TNS Hoseok is amazing though and I really love him. In this fic he’s even more amazing though and I just...god I want him so badly. Urgh, 10/10

Eating For Two by @park-moomin

; Hoseok x Reader

; Synopsis: He’ll have a Large

; My Thoughts: ARGH GOD I REMEMBER READING THIS. URGH, what is it about Hoseok that makes the idea of oral sex with him just so...amazing? Actually just any sex. Any at all. I love the idea of him being so...eager and desperate to go down on his girl, particularly when she’s pregnant so that she can still get some pleasure and fun out of it. Also, him cumming in his pants is just...the cherry on top haha

The Devil In His Details by @park-moomin

; Jimin x Reader

; Synopsis: Evil comes in many forms. In this instance, it's a 5'8" pretty-boy with an even prettier dick. And you're the form you want him to come in.

; My Thoughts: Lawd, I remember this being one of the hottest smut’s I’ve read in a while and I still stand by that statement. It does make me laugh that this was supposed to be a 1k drabble cos...girl...this length reminds me of me haha. Still, I think Jimin got the blowjob of his life...probably every man’s life here. Well done Jimin, go back for more.

Hot Rod by @kinktae

; Greaser!Hoseok x Reader

; Synopsis: a 1950′s inspired fic where greaser hoseok can’t keep his eyes, or hands, off the new waitress at his and his boys’ favorite diner.

; My Thoughts: The whole Rewind series that Rose has been doing but you all know I’m a Hoseok hoe and HOOOOO BOOOOOY GREASER HOSEOK IS SOMETHING ELSE. Everything about this fic was just...wonderful and it felt delightfully 1950s. The lingo and outfits, the cars and everything. It was hot and Hoseok deserves everything. I still kinda hope there’ll be a drabble or something in the future but either way, read this as it’s soooo good!

The Boyfriend Concept by @kpopfanfictrash

; Pornstar!Jimin x Reader

; Synopsis: Win a Date with a Porn Star! You saw the sign when you walked in, of course, but you had no idea your friend dropped your name into the raffle. Fast-forward to later that day, when you actually win. You are horrified, of course, with no intention of accepting and setting yourself up for embarrassment. But then you meet Jimin, and decide this might be worth a shot.

; My Thoughts: Shanna always writes some of the best fics on tumblr and this is definitely one of them. You’d think with it being a ‘win a date with a pornstar fic’ that he’d be a little weird or something about it (there’s nothing wrong with pornstars but you can imagine it’d be odd) but Jimin is just...so sweet and kind and polite! He’s just...the perfect boyfriend honestly. It just so happens he does porn too...I honestly loved this so much!

Beneath The Boughs by @gimmesumsuga

; Dryad!Namjoon x Reader

; Synopsis: For almost as long as you can remember, the tree stood opposite your apartment has been a part of your life. Countless memories have been made under the shade of its supple branches, but when its existence comes under threat, you soon discover that your favourite tree is more special to you than you ever could’ve known.

; My Thoughts: I still maintain that this fic is just basically Steph gushing about her love for Namjoon all over the page. It’s just...so sweet and soft. Namjoon makes the perfect dryad and I can easily imagine him being one. He’s such a delightful character who you just want to protect and teach about the world because he has that kind of delightful innoncence. I loved it so much!

Sweeter Than Sweet by @gimmesumsuga

; OT7 X Reader

; Synopsis: You never would have expected someone like Park Jimin to notice you. As handsome and beguiling as he is deadly, you’re enthralled from the very moment you meet. Addicted to his kiss and his bite, Jimin opens up your eyes to a whole new world of love, lust and seduction.

; My Thoughts: This is like...the OG OT7 fic. The one that EVERYONE should read. It’s so close to finishing and I’m kind of mind boggled that it’s going to finish. It’s just...perfection. Jimin is delightful and Yoongi is sweet, it’s just so perfect, I love it all. Namjoon is still a dick, sorry Steph. I also maintain that I’m secretly marrying Hoseok. Everyone go read it and strap yourselves in for a long ride!

Bump In The Night by @fortunexkookie

; Hoseok x Reader

; Synopsis: You’d spent countless nights terrified of the beast that lurked in the shadows, but as it would turn out, the monster haunting your home wasn’t a monster all. He was just a boy, and the only crime he’d ever committed was daring to love a girl from a different world.

; My Thoughts: Arrrrghhhhonaeouthnoetahnouenth this fic is just....perfect. I love it SO MUCH. Hoseok is a genuine monster in this, not just someone who thinks he is. He looks like a monster. But he’s a monster who gets a best friend in the reader and who slowly falls in love with her. I SWEAR MY HEART DIED WHEN THE THING HAPPENED :( Poor Hoseok, my sweet boy. But then...the end! And I was like ‘waaah’ I mean, I don’t know how she’s gonna live there but...I have hope for this odd couple because their love survived a lot <333

One Thing Right by @hobios

; Jungkook x Reader

; Synopsis: “i’ve been wrong about a million times, but i’ve got one thing right.”

or, desperate to get your ailing mother into the best care possible, you ask your childhood friend turned enemy to marry you for his health insurance benefits. the only problem is it’s illegal. and he’s the sheriff. and you swore to hate him since the day he broke your best friend’s heart.

; My Thoughts: Ahh...this is such a well written fic and I enjoy it so much. Jungkook has such good characterisation in it and you can feel that the readers heart is in the right place! I really like it and it reads so well, like it actually reads like a legitimate novel tbh!

Wall To Wall by @winetae

; Pornstar!Hoseok x Pornstar!Reader

; Synopsis: Temporary popularity is the biggest threat to your career right now. Without a solid core fan base you’re doomed to be forgotten. If not now, then in a month or two, and if not then, surely by the end of the year. That’s how quickly the adult film industry cycles through their actors, especially when you’re a woman. Your agent comes forward with a proposition to help put you back on the map.

; My Thoughts: Okay look...this fic is just great. I’m eagerly anticipating the second part because the first was just written so well. It’s so unique in that the readers already has a boyfriend, Jimin, who is not only okay with her being a pornstar but is the one who films her! But then you’ve got Hoseok, the new guy on the block who’s ridiculously good. The sex is just...it feels so realistic and like it’s two people in a relationship having sex and not just being filmed on camera. God I want them together lol

Club Zombie by @floralseokjin

; Seokjin x Reader

; Synopsis: In a world overrun by zombies, you’d think everyone was a goner, but the reality is much different. A steady diet of brains lets a zombie exist as a fully functioning human. Just ignore the part where they’re technically dead… In fact, these days, the amount of zombies outweigh the humans. A lot jump at the chance to be turned. Beg for it.

Kim Seokjin controls the underground of Seoul. No one would dare cross him. That’s how most of the world goes these days. You wouldn’t want to get on the wrong side of a zombie now, would you? However, you don’t quite see it like that. Spending most nights dancing at the club he owns, you catch his eye. It’s never the wrong side if you’re underneath him, right…?

; My Thoughts: Look...I still can’t believe I read a fic with zombie sex and that I actively WANTED to read a fic with zombie sex lol. But disregarding that, it’s still phenomenally written and the world is built up so well! I loved reading this and it didn’t feel as long as it’s word count. The characters were interesting with little tidbits being thrown out there that made you a little more interested in their history.

Defining Heaven by @akinnie75

; Hoseok x Reader

; Synopsis: “If I try to fly, will I make it to heaven, or will I fall straight down? But what exactly is heaven?” It’s a question that’s been in Hoseok’s mind a lot after cutting ties with his parents and ending his relationship with his ex-girlfriend. Dreaming is his fear, but you tell him that it’s not as scary as he thinks it is. Even in the depths of his own despair, you reach your hand out, but will he take it?

; My Thoughts: At this point, I think I just love anything by this author. But this fic was so...real and beautiful. The connection between two people who want more from life and deserve from life, who are both stuck. Hoseok’s story is heart breaking and getting to see him slowly come to life and learn to care for himself again was beautiful, while seeing the reader getting to care for herself by caring for him was just beautiful as well.

Florescence by @jincherie

; Hybrid!Taehyung x Reader x Hybrid!Seokjin

; Synopsis: Okay, so maybe you’re lonely, and maybe there is something missing in your life, a void that you maybe want to fill with a companion that may or may not be of human origin… You’re perfectly content not doing anything about it though, until your best friend calls you in desperate need for your help and you suddenly end up coming home with not one, but two hybrids that may or may not have been on the way to the chopping block had you not taken them in. They’re more than a little rough around the edges, and the situation is less than ideal but… maybe the best things don’t always come in perfect, shiny packages. Maybe they just need a little time to bloom.

; My Thoughts: I love this story so much :333 it’s such an interesting twist on hybrid’s in that there are ones who get discarded because they’re ‘defective’. It’s horrible to think about and I just want to love both of them. Jin is so...sweet and he tries so hard, being the one to put himself out there with the reader because Taehyung is just a sweet and shy bub. Seeing them come to life slowly is so rewarding!

Moon Magic by @jincherie

; Merman!Hoseok x Reader

; Synopsis: You’ve never paid much mind to the moon, but you quickly learn that even though you’ve never really thought of the her, she has always watched over you. What better to heal an grieving heart, than the luminous, rippling magic of the moon? And maybe a merman, or two. You know, for good measure.

; My Thoughts: I LOVE THIS FIC SO MUCH AND I KNOW THAT YOU WROTE FOR ME AND I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT I STILL LOVE IT. Hoseok is such a sweetheart and it’s adorable that you can see he’s falling in love much faster than she’s falling in love with him :333 the world is so realised, even though it’s just an island and everything is just...so perfect!

We Float by @lamourche

; Massage Therapist!Hoseok x Reader

; Synopsis: Might as well get this over with. You sigh and raise your hand to knock, steeling yourself for patchouli and shell necklaces. The door opens. A face peers out at you. There’s no beard, no long shaggy hair. For a moment, you wish he did walk around shirtless. He’s handsome. He’s taller than you, with brown hair that almost falls into his eyes and undercut on the sides. Warm brown eyes and a cute nose. It’s fucking cute his nose. He’s wearing cargo shorts, a Hawaiian shirt and white crocs. Well, that’s better. He’s still handsome and his kind eyes make you want to confess some prior sin, but it’s easy to scowl at a guy in white crocs.

; My Thoughts: This is still such a wonderful and beautiful fic. Hoseok’s agoraphobia is dealt with tactfully and he’s not magically cured by the end, but it’s so lovely to see that he’s willing to try and combat it a little more because he loves her. And she loves him, accepting him as he is and not pushing for more than he’s willing to give!

Tip 143 by @minflix

; Hoseok x Reader

; Synopsis: Even though he is everything you find attractive in a man, your friend and co-worker Jung Hoseok is just exactly that - a friend and co-worker. For some reason, you have never found yourself attracted to him even though all the girls and guys around you go absolutely crazy for him.But that all changes for you one night while scrolling through Heart2Heart, a sex live cam website…

; My Thoughts: AHHHHHH I LOVE IT SO MUCHHHHH. THIS IS ONE OF MY FAVOURITE HOSEOK FICS ON THIS WHOLE SITE. It’s so wonderfully written and I adore reading it, even re-reading it. Hoseok is so funny and just...so light hearted. He’s not hugely bothered about anything and the way he goes along wtih the reader and even helps her to film her videos, even going so far as to...well going for her ;). And yet they both just think that they’re friends when nope, you’re idiots because you LOVE EACH OTHER. I genuinely love it so much, always a favourite and will remain close to my heart <333

See Both Sides Like Chanel by @minflix

; Namjoon x Reader x Hoseok

; Synopsis: You, Namjoon, and Hoseok are inseparable. Three best friends that grew up together since you were all in diapers.But lately, Namjoon has been drifting away…

So on his birthday, you and Hoseok remind him just how inseparable the three of you really are.

; My Thoughts: This couple...is perfect. I love them so much, they’re so well suited to each other. Rich brats who despite being rich and snobby, all genuinely love each other so much. Poor Namjoon when he felt like he’d been left out. <333 it’s okay Joonie, they both love you. I read this while I was in Korea and it just...made an impact. I want them all to live happily ever after with each other x-x

Euphoria by @btssavedmylifeblr

; Jungkook x Reader

; Synopsis: At the end of your life, you are given one day to live again with the man you loved. A lifetime’s love story told in a single day.

; My Thoughts: THIS IS THE SADDEST YET SWEETEST FIC EVER. Oh my god, it’s just...it’s so unbelievably bittersweet. Their love for each other and how she KNOWS that she’s dying and she’ll never see him again. How much she throws herself into the day with him and how much he clearly loves her. She knows they have their whole life set out for them and it’s just...wonderful...honestly.

Off The Deep End by @boymeetsweevil

; Merman!Yoongi x Reader

; Synopsis: Your new mermaid friend, Yoongi, helps you navigate the treacherous waters of love, sex, and National Geographic.

; My Thoughts: Ngl, the main thing I remember from this? It’s beautifully written and also fish dick lmao. But seriously, it’s a great fic to read and watching Yoongi get to experience the human world is a delight. It’s very unique in how it’s written and the biology and culture of merfolk. A definite recommendation for everyone!

#fic recs #fic recommendations #readyplayerhobi's fic recs #2019 fic recs

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nutty1005 · 4 years

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Xiao Zhan: Learning to Live with Different Opinions

Original Article: https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s/kFwWw70e6UvJ75egnRe7BA This article is published by Blogger World 博客天下 Weixin. This is also part of the article published in Blogger World 《博客天下》2020 8th Issue.

Giving others the space and freedom to voice different opinions is also a form of respect. Accepting criticisms during growth, displaying kindness in adversity.

Eye of the Storm

Acting is a profession, once you become famous, you will be labelled as “a celebrity” and you become a public figure, but in essence, you are still an average person. Just like everyone else during the pandemic period, they still need to stay quarantined at home and consider their daily meals.

“Celebrity” Xiao Zhan, who has a huge fan following, was also at home catching up on the movies on his to-watch list, watching dramas, reading, practicing his culinary skills – his work was no longer as tightly scheduled as before. This was supposed to be a rare relaxation period, but because of the sudden internet controversy, he found himself landed in the midst of public outcry, and this shattered his initial peace.

At first, he was quite confused, although he understood that any public figure would come with some sense of controversy, but when some of the controversy affected his friends and family, he felt that these were unfair to them. This point was something he could not quite understand.

After the passage of time, he slowly calmed down, and he attempted to learn to live with these different opinions. He feels that giving others the space and freedom to voice different opinions is also a form of respect, and he will accept criticisms during growth, and display kindness in adversity.

After a problem appears, the best method is to resolve the problem, and not to create another problem. This problem will obviously inspire fans (of any idol) to reflect on their actions, and consider how to reasonably handle themselves as a fan. At the same time, artists will also consider how to handle their relationships with their fans, and their teams will need to be more precise in their work. Whereas to the general public, when viewing the whole incident rationally, this can be also considered to be a part of creating a healthy internet environment.

Chance

When some people consider Xiao Zhan as one of the core members of the controversial “traffic” celebrities (TN: Traffic is a term that is used in China to describe idols with a lot of fan following), and lambast him for it, it is necessary to view his journey rationally – understand his chance entry into the entertainment business, and his unique qualities that set him apart from the rest.

Born in 1991, Xiao Zhan is almost 30, but he actually had not been famous for more than a year. Before this, like many other youngsters, he went through high school, university and work life, and never thought that he would become an artist. His university was Chongqing Technology and Business University; he majored in graphic design; while schooling he had received titles such was “Advanced Literary Individual” and “Excellent Team Member”, and also participated in the charity poster design competition organized by his university, winning awards “First Standard Award” and “Most Popular Award”; he even started his own studio with his friends. As such, it can be said that he went through a complete university education, and hence he has a certain amount of knowledge literacy.

After graduating in 2014, he worked for almost a year in a design firm. In June of the second year, because he loved singing, he joined a variety show “X-Fire”《燃烧吧少年》, in hopes of being seen by more people. This was not an easy part of his life – he had to learn dancing with zero foundation, stretching, memorizing movements, with great difficulty. Finally, he debuted as a member of the X-NINE X玖少年团 boyband.

That year, he was 25, and this fulfilled the lyrics of a song by Stefanie Sun – “The 25 year old me, there are differences now.” Then, he thought 25 years old was far away, but in the end it was really different.

However, at that point in time, China talent search variety shows did not have the popularity it would have later on, hence he was not popular upon debut – there was a period of dormancy. In the years following that, he switched paths to become an actor, and participated in web dramas, television dramas, as well as a minor role in the movie “Monster Hunt” 《捉妖记》, totaling a number of 7 to 8 shows. Because he did not come from an acting background, he felt inferior to his partners, who graduated from acting schools, during the shoots. During this period of time, he also doubted his decisions, and wondered if he had a future.

Later on, in the interview with Ren Min Wang 人民网 “Friendly Chat” 《友聊》 he said, “If initially I knew that I would later on go through so much things, I might retreat.” This is actually very similar with the encounters of many other actors, from low to high, from silent to outstanding, experience, works and reputation all have to go through an accumulation process.

At that time, he already had fans, although not too many. In his Weibo, he once had a post that was meant to communicate with his fans, named “Secret Garden”, to tell one another stories, encourage and comfort one another – it was a type of positive interaction.

Fame

The true fame came on the June of 2019. The web drama “The Untamed”, where he starred as the leading actor, aired. This drama came with a fan following from the novel it was based on, and with exquisite production quality, good acting portrayal and performance, this drama became the hottest drama of that year. It scored 7.7 in Douban (TN: Somewhat like China IMDB), which was considered above average in China, and it is worthy as a piece of “work” – although Xiao Zhan said in this interview, “Currently, I don’t think I have any piece of noteworthy work, hence I cherish every opportunity to participate in creative work.”

From this, he obtained a huge reputation, his fan size grew multi-fold, and this objectively created more difficulties for his team working behind him. From a commoner to an artist, and then to a celebrity, based on Xiao Zhan’s behavior, he is careful and cautious. When interviewed by China Youth Papers 《中国青年报》, he said “When I encounter difficulties, I will not give up easily, I will think of ways to resolve it”; “Respect everyone around me, I have to uphold the heart to honor and respect everyone around me.” When interviewed by Guang Ming Times《光明日报》, he hoped “the works that he participated in could transmit some positive values.”

At the end of last year, in CCTV Movie Channel, he also reviewed his legendary experience of 2019, “There are no adjectives to describe my 2019, hence I will say thank you, thank you to all the experiences, to all that I have.” He never talks about what role he is most satisfied with, but only that he could do better, “maybe it could be the next one”. At the same time, he expressed that he will put the focus of his career in 2020 on acting, “to an actor, works are my foundation.” This clearly shows that he is clear about his own acting career.

But evidently, the start of this year was not smooth sailing for him. This internet controversy, as a related party, he received numerous criticisms, whether with good or bad intentions, and how he viewed this whole incident, what psychological process he went through, how a public figure should bear the social responsibility, and what his next steps are…

For this, the aim of this Blogger World interview with Xiao Zhan is to “understand the problem, obtain a common understanding”.

Understood Some Things

(TN: R = Reporter, XZ = Xiao Zhan)

R: Earlier when the pandemic was at its peak, what were you busy with?

XZ: Quarantine, just like everyone else during the pandemic period. I remember it was during Chinese New Year period, following the news, seeing the medical personnel fighting at the forefront. It was especially touching when you see that they were relentlessly fighting even though they were facing a lack of medical supplies. At that time, I spoke with my staff, thought about wanting to do something, and do what I can. After the discussion to decide what to donate, we started contacting the relevant suitable organizations, communicate on what was needed, etc.

Besides this, I also received invitations to record ID videos to cheer on Wuhan and songs to beat back the pandemic. Because the songs required more professional equipment, hence I remember around the end of January, we went to the recording studio. At that time, the pandemic was at its critical period, to ensure safety, there were very limited staff on site, everyone were wearing masks, everything was strictly disinfected, every staff had to perform multiple roles, but we finished the recording with high efficiency. To me, this was a very special experience. Other then that, I was quarantined at home.

R: When you were at home, how was your daily life? How did you spend the time?

XZ: Actually just like everyone else, watch the news, watch dramas, watch movies, read books and rest. It is also quite inconvenient to order takeouts during quarantine period, hence I also trained my culinary skills. Just right at the time there were charity events to aid the farmers, hence I bought some fruits and farm products.

R: Were you concerned with the daily changes of the pandemic, what did you feel and think about?

XZ: Of course I did, I was following up on the pandemic news everyday, there were many moments that touched me. Previously there was this piece of news, a pair of husband and wife, there were both medical staff at the forefront, recognized each other despite wearing isolation robes and hugged together, that scene of reunion touched me very much. But at the same time, I saw that there were a lot more people who needed assistance, and I also felt personally that what one person can do is very limited, and I did too little.

R: When the internet controversy happened, what were you doing, what was your initial reaction, and what happened after?

XZ: I was quarantined at home at that time, when I first saw it I was extremely surprised, why there were suddenly so much topics, felt a bit confused, and understood it later like everyone else. Actually with regards to controversy, as a public figure, I was willing to bear these controversy, but some of them affected my friends and family, I felt that these were unfair to them. I could not quite understand (why they did this). And that point in time was the most critical period of the pandemic, I did not want my issues to take away too much attention, and bother everyone, hence I did not make much responses. Later on, my friends also gave me advice, and this period gave me more time to ponder over it, I also went out to do voice overs, in preparation for my future jobs, slowly I understood some things, so after a while, I started to slowly calm down.

R: You once said that in order to survive in society, one needs to learn to be complex, do you realize the complexity even more so now? Where there any changes to your life views?

XZ: There is definitely complexity, I do not think this is anything bad. Facing complex situations, we do not have the ability to force any changes, but I feel, as long as we maintain the most initial kindness and purity, work hard to do the best for the things we have decided. I have always upheld these principles, and these are also what I want to do.

R: Do you feel misunderstood? How do you adjust yourself?

XZ: It is still the same phrase from the previous interview, “When serious – work, when confused – read, when alone – think, when upset – sleep.” Actually I think this phrase can be used to aptly describe my condition for the past few months.

R: After a period of time, how do you feel about the controversy now?

XZ: We need to learn to live with different opinions, and also respect everyone’s rights to voice theirs. But this world is like this, there is a balance of energy, there are those who love you, who like you, at the the same time there will be people who hates you, who dislikes you. Giving others the space and freedom to voice different opinions is also a form of respect. Accepting criticisms during growth, displaying kindness in adversity.

No one likes you for no reason

R: We will talk about your experiences as an artist, when did you realize that you are famous? How did you feel?

XZ: Last summer, after seeing that there were more people who supported and liked me, very thankful and grateful. My father told me since young “no one likes you for no reason”, hence I hope I can live up to everyone’s like.

R: When you first entered the entertainment business, what goal did you hope to attain?

XZ: Actually my thoughts were very simple then, that is work hard to do the best in the competition, and hope to receive more recognition.

R: In being an artist, what did you feel is the most toilsome?

XZ: Every profession has its own toils, I treat my work very seriously, hardship is actually something you cannot avoid. If I really have to say something as toilsome, then it will be how I face the complex environment.

R: Many felt that you became famous overnight, but actually you already participated in several different dramas, how was your condition like then? What desires did you have for the future?

XZ: Actually there were not much difference, previously I just hoped that I always have jobs, have the opportunity to contact better roles, now is just work seriously, act properly, live everyday to the fullest. Continue on the path of an actor.

R: How did you learn performance? Where there any experience that was especially memorable?

XZ: At the start, I had no concept with regards to performance, later on I also took performance classes, with directions from performance teachers. The experience that was especially memorable was during the shooting of “The Wolf”, there was a crying scene on the highlands, a night scene, and it needed to rain, but that time, no matter what I did, I could not cry.

R: What do you think the relationship of front stage and back stage is?

XZ: I feel that front stage and back stage is not a type of relationship, but is the same job. Without the serious work and support of the backstage, the front stage will not be able to become better.

R: The character Wei Wuxian gave you a lot of glory as well as some controversy, how did you view the role?

XZ: I treat every role I have acted in seriously and with deep respect, because their story are all alternate lives that I would never experience. And portraying these characters, I really hoped that we can achieve success mutually, and win the recognition and love from the audience. I am lucky and thankful to have participated in a part of Wei Wuxian’s life, and this role also became an important part of my acting career. Also I am very grateful to the hard work from all the staff as part of this creative work, and gifted this character vitality. All these creative artists gave me the chance, and allowed me as an actor, using my own thoughts and performances, to bring forth the character Wei Wuxian, even more vividly in front of the general audiences.

R: With regards to “work”, how do you define it?

XZ: I feel that a piece of work is not just the result of a person’s hard work, behind it are also everyone’s sacrifices and creation. Currently, I don’t think I have any piece of noteworthy work, hence I cherish every opportunity to participate in creative work, and also treat every job seriously, in the future I will do my best in singing and acting.

R: The journey of fame, how did you establish your confidence, from inexperience to mature?

XZ: It is definitely a slow process. Actually it is just like that lyric in my new song “All traces passed by turned into light spots.” That is when you encounter difficulties, from it you learn and grow, the accumulation of every step, you are always on the path of growing.

R: In facing the exhaustion from work, the disturbances from the outside world, do you feel that fame is a double edged sword? How do you hope to be viewed by the outside world?

XZ: I feel that anything has its pros and cons, I have already learnt to handle it with common sense, I hope that I am still the same initial me, to be able to maintain humility and politeness.

R: Are you afraid of the uncertainty of life? Do you have insecurities?

XZ: Of course I am. Life is made up of a lot of uncertainties, many times I would also feel insecure, but isn’t the unknown life’s greatest challenge? The feeling of “singing as you walk” is great.

Be yourself, actions speak louder than words

R: You once said in an interview that you do not want to be a perfect person, can you explain what you meant?

XZ: I feel that no one can be perfect, neither can I.

R: Actor, artist and traffic celebrity, what do you think the difference are in these terms?

XZ: Actor is my career, artist and traffic celebrity, to me, are just a label, that is on every public figure. I will do the best for my job, in the future I will be even more serious in my singing, acting, and continue to bear whatever social responsibility I should bear.

R: You once said that communication is very important, now that you are too famous, will this bring about difficulties in communication?

XZ: The changes in my identity definitely brought along some inconveniences, but to my friends, my family and me, the communication has always remained the same. In facing those who like me and support me, I feel that I am communicating with them via my works, hence I will humbly accept all good intent criticisms and corrections on my profession.

R: You did not change your Weibo account after your debut, and also said that that you are very real, and you want to show everyone the real you. To the public who do not understand you, what do you have to say?

XZ: I always said, I am not a perfect person, but that does not prevent me from working hard towards becoming a better person. I am a more direct person, I also wanted to present the real me to everyone, hence I never considered changing my Weibo account, those were all my experiences and memories, the testament to my growth. I will not use youth or commoner as an excuse.

I started using Weibo when I was 19 or 20 years old, when I was still young and a commoner, and I said some very inappropriate words or opinions that are unacceptable now, and it probably did cause trouble or hurt to others. Hence I also wanted to say, after reflecting, to those who were hurt by these opinions, I express my most sincere apologies. If I could use my current experience and sensibleness back then, I would definitely respect everyone’s effort in their work, and will not comment rashly.

R: Your Weibo used to be very lively, full of witty words, you also liked to snatch the top comment on your own posts, and interacted with your fans, but later on, these posts were generally non existent, almost as if your image became flat, how do you feel?

XZ: Just representing myself only, I feel that the image on social media cannot encompass an entire person, that is only an outlet. I am always willing to communicate with everyone, but I am also afraid to bother others, if the effect of bother becomes greater than sharing, that would be something that I very much would not want to see.

#xiao zhan #sean xiao #xiaozhan #肖战

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