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cc-tinslebee · 3 years

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Okay, so, about a month ago, my brain just conjured up probably the most random au possible: Legally Blonde Adam Banks/banksway au.

Believe me, it's as chaotic as it sounds, but lowkey, I'm kind of in love with it.

Adam never joins the Ducks because there aren't any Ducks to join. Bombay never had to do community service with District Five so there was no one to realise that Adam was on the wrong team all along. He continues to play for the Hawks and, eventually, the Eden Hall Warriors, never getting the chance to become the well-rounded individual we know him as because he's never known anything other than his rich privilege and the "win at all costs" mentality. He ends up going to college on a hockey scholarship and not straight to the NHL or the AHL (shocking, I know). While he's unsure of his major and where his life is heading, he finds solace in the fraternity he joins, which, by some sheer twist of fate, Jesse and Guy have also miraculously joined.

And his life is perfect for a while. He's the star player on yet another school's hockey team, all of his fraternity brothers adore him (though, it took a bit for Jesse to warm up to him), and his secret, not-really-official thing with his former teammate is going swimmingly. (Not to slander my boy, but I was picturing Larson for the role of Warner, purely because the alternative seems to be Rick Riley and that's kind of an unsettling image-- though, maybe that's the point?)

But then his secret boyfriend breaks up with him because, with his high aspirations in life, he needs to be "more serious." And dating Adam Banks, a guy in a stereotypical fraternity who only really knows hockey, in 2001 isn't exactly the white-picket-fence life he's looking for if he's going to be a politician.

And since this non-Duck Adam clearly doesn't have the braincells that canon Adam does, in his devastation, he decides it's a brilliant idea to prove that he is serious by applying to Harvard Law. His parents try to talk him out of it, since they want him to pursue his dreams of hockey, but being a lawyer is a respectable career so they can't exactly argue with him.

He gets accepted thanks to Jesse, Guy, and the rest of his fraternity helping him study for the LSAT and keeping him on track. He's trying his darndest when he gets to Harvard, but (despite his struggle not being as significant as Elle Woods'), not a lot of people take him seriously as an aspiring lawyer, considering him a meathead jock who only got in because of daddy's money.

And that's about the time he meets Linda, who he vaguely remembers from his time at Eden Hall. What he doesn't remember is her being so competitive, because she's deliberately beating him at every turn, just trying (and kind of succeeding) at making him look like a fool. To make matters worse, all of the sudden, she's engaged to his ex-boyfriend, who is very adamant about never telling anyone that he and Adam were more than friends (because, you know, early 2000s homophobia and such).

But things get a little brighter for Adam when he meets Charlie, an undergrad teacher's assistant who gives him all sorts of advice about surviving the school. He introduces him to Professor Bombay, who Charlie claims is the only reason he survived his first year and quickly becomes Adam's favourite teacher, and Charlie's childhood friend Connie, who aspires to be a state senator one day. Charlie's charismatic and even if he's not the most well-liked person at Harvard, Adam feels a weight lifted off his shoulders once he becomes friends with him and Connie. Things become a little easier.

Just before he and Charlie start getting really close, Adam meets Casey at a local diner on a day he's feeling particularly upset and alone, and the two start bonding almost immediately. (He bullshits his way into scaring an ex-husband of hers with legal repercussions he has no idea about and she basically adopts him in return.) It takes him an embarrassing amount of time to realise that it's not just a coincidence that Casey and Charlie share the same last name, which results in poor Adam feeling extremely embarrassed for not connecting the dots sooner while Charlie's having the time of his life teasing him for it. Eventually, when the dust of that settles, Charlie and Adam join forces to set Casey and Bombay up, their schemes borderline ridiculous at times, but they'rere not exactly failing.

And after realising he isn't the Warriors moron she thought he was for going on five years, Linda starts warming up to Adam, which is surprisingly nice? She figures out on her own that there used to be something between him and her fiancé, and is more understanding of Adam than she is mad. Linda actually spills to him the lengths Adam's ex had to go through to actually get into Harvard, aligning more with the rumours about Adam's acceptance being bought than having the aptitude for the law that Linda and Adam share. (This may be me saying Linda and Adam friendship rights, what of it-- /lh)

To make things all the better, Bombay chooses Adam, Linda, Connie, Charlie, and Adam's ex to be on his legal team for a murder case he's responsible for (and while he knows about Adam and Charlie's ploys to hook him up with Charlie's mom, they're his favourites, so he doesn't say anything).

And this is just so much better than anything he had before. After all the initial unpleasantness, Linda and Connie become some of the most genuine friends he's ever had. He misses Guy and Jesse, of course, and he'd never take them for granted, but back when he was with them at the fraternity, a part of him was still being as superficial as he had been in middle and high school. Being authentic for once in his life is liberating.

And Charlie's just about the most considerate person Adam's ever met. Adam doesn't even mind when Charlie teases him over his absurd and juvenile insults because he's just this source of light for Adam, supporting him and always pushing him to be the best version of himself. His ex hardly even exists when Charlie's around because his energy is just so contagious that Adam starts falling for him long before he even realises it. (And when Jesse and Guy come to visit, there's a moment where it all clicks and the four of them realise their history together, however brief. I strongly maintain that they'd be that Starkid meme: "Fucking Hawks? We hated you guys!" "We hated ourselves!" But it does make Adam realise how much better off he would've been if he had Charlie and his team when he was little instead of the Hawks, and it just further makes him understand that people like Larson and Rick Riley just aren't worth it.)

But there's also another revelation Adam goes through. Between helping Casey, his rigorous studies, and his position working with/for Bombay, something just clicks for Adam. He likes being able to help people, fighting for the good guys who may not have the resources they need to be properly defended. Practicing law calls to him in the same way hockey did; it's the feeling of knowing this is what he's meant to do. He still loves hockey, he always will, but it helps him finally grasp that there's a world for him outside of it; when hockey ends for him, there's something equally as rewarding that he can pursue, which was something he never thought he would have.

I haven't a single coherent thought about this au past that point except for these little inklings of an ending--

There's absolutely no SA scene like the movie had; Bombay's just Adam and Charlie's favourite teacher and those are his boys, so he's going to make sure they succeed as if his life depends on it.

With that said, Bombay believes in them both enough to let them finish the case because with their joined determination/stubbornness (and Adam's in with the defendant), Adam and Charlie are a force to be reckoned with and he knows it.

After a handful of comedic failures, they do end up succeeding at their attempts to set Casey and Bombay up, and they start living together sometime during the kids' Junior year :) (All I'm asking is for one (1) story with a Casey/Gordon endgame-- I just think they're neat--)

Linda dumps her fiancé (as she should) and goes on to live her best wlw life as a successful lawyer. (If I'm not mistaken, Linda's actress actually is a lawyer, which is a pretty cool fun fact!!)

Adam and Linda's ex gets the Warner ending because, man, screw that guy /lh (rip to Larson if this is him, I'm sure you'll get a nice endgame in some other universe, king)

Honorary mention for Connie, who was going long distance with Guy this entire time to everyone but Jesse's shock, and they get their Game Changers endgame of State Senator Connie Moreau and stay-at-home dad Guy Germaine with their seven -- sorry, three -- children :)

Adam's an absolute bundle of nerves after graduation, which definitely concerns Charlie. So, when he asks if he's okay, Adam starts nervously monologuing about their time together until he runs out of breath. He ends it by proposing to him, and Charlie smiles so surely at him when he says yes. They both become damn good public defenders and stay engaged until the point they can legally get married, but they're practically husbands long before that happens.

Also, if I did my math right (which I should’ve, it’s my entire basis for my Share Your Address series), the Ducks’ would have the same graduating class year as Elle Woods anyway (2004), which is pretty neat!

Thank you once again for listening to me ramble :)

#i just think they're neat that's all--#full disclosure: i have not listened to/seen the musical yet but I have heard very good things about it #adam banks #charlie conway #gordon bombay #linda the mighty ducks #connie moreau #banksway #charlie x adam #the mighty ducks #casey x gordon

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harryssunflowerkiwi · 3 years

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‘KIWI’ Part 2.

Pairing: Harry Styles x female reader.

Synopsis: You see Harry again. he’s still smitten and you’re horny.

Word count: 8.1K

Warnings: swearing, drinking, drugs (cocaine; mentioned in some detail), and SMUT (unprotected! Wrap it up pls), and slight pain kink. 18+

A/N: Hello! I hope you’re doing good :) here’s part two!!! Yay!! Thank you to those who liked part one. I truly am having so much fun writing this. Sorry it took me 80000 years to post this, I took a break! But it’s here and I’m so happy. Also, this is my first time writing smut! So please be nice but let me know what you think. Again, please keep in mind that this is PURE FICTION and is in no way an accurate dipiction of Harry Styles! It’s just for entertainment purposes. Also! For the purpose of the story, please pretend kiwi was not part of HS1 and instead part of his third (unwritten) album :) With that being said, i hope you love this part as much as I do xoxo

PLEASE REBLOG IF YOU LIKE IT :)

🥝 Outfits mentioned in this part 🥝

Words underlined are links !

PART 1

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September 12th 2020~

It’s nine days since Harry had met you, nine long days. For him the days since have been filled with long studio hours and sleepless nights. Every night he’d come home and wonder when he’d get the chance to meet you again, he’d think about what you were doing and if you were thinking about him as much as he’d been thinking about you. Surely you hadn’t, he thought. If you had been interested you would have given him your phone number, like all the other girls had jumped at the chance to do. He tried to stay humble, but he wasn’t oblivious to the effect he had on women. It was obvious, atleast it always had been before. They all threw themselves at him, but you didn’t. You didn’t even give him a proper excuse to why he couldn’t have your number. You showed him very little interest and yet, here he was completely infatuated after one simple meeting. Sure, meeting you gave him enough inspiration to write songs which was initially the reason he went to that party. But it only left him wanting to do whatever he could to get the chance to see you again.

The days since the party have been rather stress filled for you on the other hand. With London fashion week coming up in less than a week you had so much work to do. You had a fashion show on the seventeenth to prepare for and dozens of custom outfits for various celebrities to finalize. It was both exhausting and exhilarating. You had thought about Harry, he’d pop up in your head whenever a song of his would play in the office or in the coffee shop you went to almost everyday. You felt the spark when you two had met, of course you did. He was incredibly attractive, charming, and kind but you didn’t have time to be dating a celebrity of his stature. You have a buisness to run and the last thing you need a bunch of insanely nosey fans bullying you along with the heartbreak of the inevitable break up.

Harry was sitting in the studio with Mitch, Sarah, and Charlotte recording. The three of his band mates were in the booth recording their respective parts of a song Harry had written a few months back called “30,000 miles” while Harry was sat on one of the black leather couches just outside the booth attempting to write. Although he’s been able to write a lot about you, he’s only gotten one song even remotely close to being finished. Most of what’s he’s writin since meeting you has come out more like journal entries about how your eyes made him quiver and how when you hugged him he felt like your touch was exactly what he’d been missing thus far. It all sounded like a horny fourteen year old, Harry thought. He needed to see you again for his feelings to repourpose themselves into more coherent emotions. Harry had been wracking his brain on how to make that happen since the two of you met, and the only thing he could think of was to ask Jeff. The only problem with that, however, was that Jeff would more than likely tell you and make Harry look desperate. And even though he was bordering on desperate, he certainly didn’t want you to know that.

Harry was lost in thought (about you of course) when Mitch came out of the booth and sat in the dark blue velvet armchair directly across from Harry. “Still having trouble dude?” He asked sympathetically bringing Harry out of his little trance. Harry sighed and moved his gaze away from the small leather bound notebook he was writing in to focus on his friend.

“S’ just hard man. S’neva been this hard before.” Harry said as he closed the book.

Mitch nodded and mumbled “it’s probably because you’ve never been single while tryna write”. Harry put his palms over his face and let out deep chuckle.

“Fuck, you’ve go’ a good point” he agreed as he sat lower into the couch.

“Are you interested in anyone at all right now? I mean I don’t think I’ve seen ya single for this long in forever” Mitch pointed out as he reached for his water bottle from beside the sound board. Harry sighed deeply, ran his right hand through his curls and gave Mitch a little pout.

“Who is she dude?” Mitch asks with after letting out a loud laugh at his friend being overly dramatic.

“Y’ remember y/n? The designer fo’ KIWI?” Harry responds, leaning forward and rests his left palm under his chin.

“Fuckin hell H. Wasn’t that night the first time you met her?” Mitch says with a grin, obviously teasing Harry.

“I know, I know. S’fuckin ridiculous but I can’ stop thinking about her” Harry replied as he slouched himself back into the couch shoved his black raybans off the top of his head so they were sitting on his nose, covering his embassment.

September 13th 2020~

Today is Sunday, which means it’s Harry’s day off. He didn’t really know what to do with the day but he was still extremely happy to have time to relax and try (and fail) to not worry about everything. He woke up at ten this morning, actually allowing himself to sleep in to make up for the various all nighters he had been pulling throughout the last week. He dreamt of you but not in the way he’d want, not one of those erotic sex dreams where he could make all his needs come true. No. In his dream you were with someone else, and he kept trying to talk to you but you couldn’t hear him or you were simply ignoring him. Either way it didn’t feel good but for some ungodly reason he’d still woken up with a raging boner. “Fuckin ‘ell even the thought of her wit’ someone else gets me off” he grumbled with a groan in frustration as he rolled out of bed.

As Harry was making himself breakfast, chopping yellow grape tomatoes on the large oak cutting board that sat on the marble counter next to the stove, he heard his phone ring. He looked around to try and spot where the ringing was coming from as he’d forgotten where he’d put it. He spotted it on the island behind him and to his left. He sprinted over to it and quickly answered with his left hand, wiping the tomato juice off the fingers on his right hand off on his blue sweatpants. “Harry here” he said realizing he hadn’t checked to see who it was before answering.

“Harry! I’ve got great news for you mate” Mitch’s deep American accent rang through the phone.

“Wha’ is the good news Mitch?” Harry asked as he sat at one of the light blue quilted stools that sat at the island, suddenly feeling slightly anxious.

“I’ve just found out KIWI is doing a show for London fashion week, it’s this Thursday” Harry could practically hear the grin on Mitch’s face through his voice. A fashion show? How could he get an invite four days before the show? Would he even get the chance to see her if he did? Won’t she be busy? Won’t she think he’s weird for going? Harry’s mind was filled with questions he knew Mitch wouldn’t have the answers to.

“Dude?” Mitch’s voice snapped Harry out of his panicked thoughts.

“Gotta go man, thanks for telling me” Harry mumbled before hanging up quickly.

After a few hours of debating with himself and trying tirelessly to forget about the idea all together, Harry found himself sat at his dining table with his phone open to Jeff’s contact. He stared down at the phone resting against the mahogany wood dining table trying to convince himself this was a bad idea. However, his efforts were in vain in the end. He glanced at the time in the right hand corner and it showed 12:41AM. He pressed the call button so quickly he himself even doubted if he’d done it at all, but evidently the calling screen came up and he brought it to his ear. Letting out a huge sigh at the forth ring, figering Jeff wouldn’t even pick up at this time of night. “Hello?” Harry almost dropped the phone when he’d heard Jeff’s voice on the other end.

“Um h-hello, Jeff s’ Harry” he stuttered slightly, still not really believing he was going through with this.

“Yeah H, I know. What’s up?” Jeff chuckled loudly.

“Oh umm so you uh know y/n right?” Harry asked trying not to seem to eager.

Again, Jeff laughed a bit before saying “you like her don’t you?”. Harry groaned internally at his friends ability to gudge his feelings based on his voice alone.

“Doesn’ matter, was jus’ callin’ to see if you could get meh a seat at the KIWI show on Thursday” Harry said as more of a statement rather than a question, feeling his confidence peak its head again.

“H, that’s in four days” Jeff responded without hesitation.

“Yeh I know, I jus’ ave’ to be there alrigh’?” Harry asked as politely as he could without making it obvious he was trying desperately to avoid any further questioning.

“Alright, I’ll see what I can do”.

September 14th 2020~

Today was incredibly busy for you. There were only three days till your show and you still had so much to do to make sure it would be perfect. You were currently at the office that you rent out for KIWI. The space is nice, modern and open with a slightly acclectic feel to match your taste. There were 3 separated offices, the smallest was for your assistant Grace, another for the head of public relations for the company who’s name is Gretchen, and the largest one at the end of the hall was yours. You decorated nicely, but kept it minimal as to not cause to many distractions. You only came in when there was issues you couldn’t deal with from home or when you just felt like getting out of the house to work. You liked to keep your company small, only hiring people who you really trust for jobs you couldn’t handle yourself. Even though KIWI is incredibly successful, you were generally able to manage it with little help.

At 7:13AM you arrived, greeting Grace and heading straight to your private office telling her to follow you. Once sat in your large brown leather chair Grace started giving you the rundown of who’s called, what there is to do, shipments, etc. “Jeff Azoff called early this morning, he left a voicemail asking for your availability. I told him to call back at 11 just before you go out for lunch as that is your earliest availability today” she relayed as she stood nervously (she was pretty much always nervous, even though she’d been working for you for over two years).

“Okay, did he mention what it was about?” You asked wondering what he could possibly need that he wouldn’t just call your cell.

“No, but he did say it’s urgent” Grace responded with a small nod.

At a quarter to eleven your desk phone rang, you picked up at the first ring already sitting right next to it typing out an email on your laptop. “Mr. Azoff on line 2” Grace said on the other side.

“Great, thanks Grace” you responded before hanging up and switching to line two. “Hey Jeff” you said as you closed your laptop.

“Hi! How’s it going y/n, haven’t talked since the party” he asked seeming quite cheery.

“I’m good Jeff, why are you calling through KIWI? Why not just call my cell?” You questioned rather confused.

“Ah because you told me not to call your cell for matters concerning KIWI-” he said as if it was obvious.

“Right, but you you’ve only ever called regarding KIWI to get pieces for one of your clients and you usually go through Gretchen” you cut him off, still extremely confused.

He chuckled before saying “Well If you’d stop cutting me off I’d tell you why I’m calling. I need a front row seat for your show on Thursday”. Well, that was certainly not what you thought he’d say. He’s never asked for a seat at one of your shows, let alone a front row three days before it happens.

“What? Are you insane? It’s in three days. Why on earth would you need a front row seat?” You asked, now even more confused.

“It’s not for me, it’s for Harry. C’mon I know you can bump someone back a bit, it’ll be good publicity having him there” Jeff said calmly. You had to do a bit of a double take when he mentioned Harry’s name, why would Jeff need him to be there this last minute? He had surely already been invited to the Gucci show on the same day. You sighed

“I don’t know, the people I put in front row deserve to be there. Any of them would take it as an insult to be put in second row”. You heard hum quietly on the other side of the phone

“y/n if you put Harry upfront it’ll be good for KIWI, you know I’m right” he continued. You let out a frustrated huff, you knew he was right. The paps would have a field day with him missing the Gucci show to come to yours, but you already had so much to deal with.

“Was this your idea or his?” You asked, genuinely curious. “He asked me to, but I think it’s an incredible idea for both of you” he said confidently.

“Fine, call Grace to set up the details. I’ll have an outfit sent to Harry by Wednesday morning just email me his measurements. He can’t be showing up to my show in Gucci” you replied sternly, giving in.

Harry was at the studio when Jeff called him. He was going over some adjustments for ‘30,000 miles’ with Kid Harpoon when his phone rang. “Jeff! Any news?” He said hopefully after picking up as soon as he was Jeff’s contact.

Jeff chuckled at the boys eagerness “Mhm you’re lucky I’m so good at convincing people, you’ve got a front row seat at the KIWI fashion show this Thursday” he said proudly.

Harry stood out of the leather rolling chair instantly and yelled “Wooooo!” Slightly starting Kid and causing Jeff to laugh through the phone.

“I’m glad I could get it for ya H. They are sending over an outfit for you to wear and I’ll have a car at your place on Thursday at 6PM sharp to pick you up.” Harry smiled widely, taking in the information as he sat back down.

“Thank ya’ Jeff, y’ the best manager eva’”

September 17th 2020~

Today is the big day. Of course it’s not your first runway show but the nerves never lessen, every time it gets more intense and nerve-racking. The cloths you design are your heart and soul, your blood sweat and tears, your everything. This makes showing them off to critics and the entire world terrifying but exciting. Not to mention you’ve decided to walk as the last model for the finale, which makes the whole thing even scarier as you’ve never really walked a runway as a model.

For some reason the knowledge that Harry was going to be front row made you all the more anxious and you hated it. No man has ever made you nervous at your own damn fashion show, it’s rediculous. “I don’t even like him” you said aloud to yourself as you were in the car on the way to the venue. Luckily by now your driver knows well enough to keep his mouth shut when you talk to yourself.

Once you arrived at the venue it was half past two. You always show up hours before the show to help set up, get all the outfits in place for the respective models and make sure everything is absolutely perfect. You’d spent months designing the way you wanted the show to look, clothing aside. The catwalk is all white, ensuring that all the colors included in the collection pop as they were meant to, especially once photographed. Above the runway are large fixtures that are meant to look like clouds, giving the whole collection an airy out-of-this-world feel. Which is exactly what you had planned when designing it.

Backstage was hectic and stressful, as it always was. The models all arrived at three, giving everyone enough time to get hair and makeup done in time for the show. The makeup and hair you had chosen for this collection was simple, yet bold. Nothing to extreme to not take away from the clothes.

Harry was incredibly excited for the show, more excited than he had been for a fashion show since the first one he attended. He was there to see you, but he was also elated to get to see the collection. He’s never been disappointed by the pieces you’d designed. Even before his newfound crush on you. You were exceedingly talented and fantastic at what you do, he’s known that since long before he met you. The suit you’d sent for him was breathtaking to say the least. He absolutely adored it. It was a black suit, with gold lining and silver flower embroidery all along the jacket. It made him feel like a billion dollars.

Harry arrived just before the show started, not to seem to eager in case you came to survey the venue before it started. He found the seat with his name on it and grinned widely as he sat. His seat was right at the end of the runway where the models would turn before walking back. It was the ideal spot really, and it gave him butterflies thinking that you gave him the best spot. The venue was nothing like he’d ever seen before and he was sure you had something to do with that also, because it was breathtaking.

Time went by like a blink of the eye for you, what seemed like twenty minutes turned out to be an hour. You were ushered to the hair and makeup chair to prepare for the finale. For some reason all your nerves had dissipated, completely vanished into thin air as you sat and listened to the makeup artist compliment you on how incredible everything looked.

After forty minutes in the hair and makeup chair you were being dressed. You had chosen one of the only gowns in the collection for the finale, wanting to go out on a memorable note (even though you considered every piece in the collection to be memorable). The gown was a floor length fully hand embroidered black and gold gown. Each embroidery was done by you. It had long sleeves with the same detailing and it was sinched perfectly around your waist with a large solid gold plate. The gown was the piece that inspired the whole collection, taking almost six months to make. You were very proud of it and you felt incredibly sexy.

As your stylists were putting you in your black pumps, one of the coordinators came over and said “miss y/l/n is on in five”. You took a deep breath, attempting to mentally prepare yourself. You followed the coordinator towards the entrance to the catwalk. You felt eerily calm, you knew you should be freaking out but you weren’t. You felt incredible.

“3..2...1.. here comes y/n for the finale”

Harry was thoroughly enjoying the show, each item was completely perfect. Everything was cohesive but wildly different, anyone with working eyes could tell how much thought and attention to detail was put into everything. Even the styling was uniquely perfect, each model wore the pieces like they were made for them. Not a single thing looked out of place, everything belonged in a rabelious harmony and Harry was completely enveloped in it. The music stopped playing as the last model walked out, Harry looked around as another song started playing. Assuming this was the finale, Harry sat up straighter and grinned. Excited to see whatever you had planned. As the beat dropped in the song, all the models came walking out in two lines. One on the right and one on the left. Once the two front models came to the end of the catwalk they all stopped and slowly bowed their heads. Harry’s heart was beating so fast he thought he might actually have a heart attack. Then all of a sudden you walked around the corner and stepped onto the runway and Harry’s heart stopped completely. You were walking towards him like you had walked a million runways. You looked so powerful and sexy. The gown you wore was nothing short of breathtaking, a fine piece of art and the way it fit your body made all the blood rush towards his crotch.

As you reached the end of the catwalk you looked directly at Harry, who was sitting right night to the main camera. You gave him a quick knowing smirk, obviously seeing the pure shock on his face as you turned around and started walking back towards the entrance. God, you felt fucking incredible. Each model followed you one by one off the runway before the music stopped.

September 23rd 2020~

The last three days went by relatively fast for you. The show went exactly how you wanted it to and it was nothing short of perfection. All the press had been incredible and the critics were being positive which wasn’t always a given. There’s been a lot of buzz about the gown you wore, in fact, there’s word of the national art museum of London wanting to showcase it which is unbelievable. All your success has been skyrocketed, even from what it was at before. Having Harry at the show helped with the media buzz, they always went crazy when he was around but it did start rumours of the two of you dating. Especially after the pictures from the show were released and it was very obvious he was staring at you in such a way. You didn’t really care though, all publicity was good publicity.

It was Wednesday today, and you decided to work from home this week because you were still pretty exhausted from all the work you’d done in preparation for the show. Your day had been relitively slow, answering emails and drawing out some new designs for spring. You were sitting at your desk drawing out a coat design when your phone started ringing, you glanced at it and saw Glenne’s name pop up. You smiled lightly and picked up up.

“Hello?” You greeted her.

“Hey y/n! How are you?” She asked cheerily.

“I’m great G, just finishing some work. How are you?” You asked as you sat back in your chair.

“Great! So the reason I’m calling is because Jeff and I wanted to throw a party for you to celebrate the show. Obviously we need you here for that” she giggled, obviously excited.

“Aw of course I’ll come. What day is it?” You asked.

“It’s Friday night! It’ll be at the Hilton hotel, just give them your name. We’d like everyone to be there at nine if possible” she responded.

“Okay! I’ll be there at seven babe” you said as you stood up to look in your fridge, suddenly feeling hungry.

“Harry will be there” Glenne said knowingly, slightly drawing out the end of his name. You laughed as you shoved a slice of cheese into your mouth.

“And?” You asked.

She giggled again, “he’s been asking about you a lot lately, and we all saw him at your show. You two are obviously fucking” she said in a mocking tone.

“G! We are not. He’s just obsessed with me” you chuckled, rummaging through your fridge for more snacks.

“Oh stop, who isn’t? Plus you guys would be adorable together!” She responded loudly through the phone.

“G, he’s the relationship type and I’m so far from that, you know this” you said sternly.

“Y/N you don’t even know him, how do you know he’s the relationship type?” She asked giggling at your tendency to assume you know people immediately upon meeting them.

“I’ve heard his music, G. Anyways, I’ve got to go make something to eat before my stomach eats itself. I’ll see you Friday”.

September 25th 2020~

As soon as Jeff told Harry about the party they were throwing for you he was ecstatic, knowing he’d get a chance to actually speak to you. Since it was a celebration of you and KIWI, Harry decided to wear some of the pieces he owned that you designed. It took him about 30 minutes to decided on which of your designs he wanted to wear, hoping you would appreciate the gesture. Jeff had already assured Harry that he wouldn’t be the only one wearing KIWI at the party when he brought up the idea to him, which made Harry feel more comfortable. Eventually he decided to wear a two piece set you’d designed last season. It was Harry’s favourite. It was a long sleeve button up shirt and long perfectly fitted trousers, both made out of a beautiful sparkly blue fabric with a light contrast stitching.

Upon arriving at the hotel Harry noticed that there were many cars parked out front and all down the street, way more than there had been at the last get together. He assumed it was because you would have invited more of your circle this time, as they were celebrating you. Harry made it up to the penthouse where the lady at the front desk had told him to go, and was greeted at the door by Jeff, quickly giving him a hug and ushering him into the large room. “Sorry I’m a little late, had some issues with m’ car” Harry apologized to Jeff with a small smile, both of them fully aware that he was indeed late because he takes so long to get ready.

“S’all good man, it’s just getting started” Jeff chuckled lowly as Harry followed him through the foyer and into the large open living room, where it seemed most of the party goers were. It was a pretty busy, around 80 people from what Harry could see. Through the crowd his eyes landed directly on you. You were talking to a small group of people, some of who Harry recognized. You were sitting on one of the big couches on the right side of the open space, you were slowly nodding while sipping from a glass of dark brown liquid. You were wearing a gold sparkly jumpsuit that hugged every inch of your torso in the most flattering way possible and flared at the from the knee down. Half of your wavy hair was effortlessly pinned back with a brown claw clip. You looked so beautiful, you stood out in the crowd of other beautiful people. Your energy and vibrancy completely overpowering the room.

As soon as Harry entered the living room with Jeff your attention was taken away from the group of friends around you. You immediately noticed that Harry was wearing one of your personal favourite designs, and you could tell he had spotted you aswell. As if he was looking for you, he smiled widely as you made eye contact. “Excuse me guys, I’m going to grab another drink” you smiled at the group before standing up and walking across the living room diagonally towards the open concept kitchen to the left of the living room. You purposefully glanced at Harry as you walked passed him with a cute innocent smile.

As soon as you entered the kitchen and bar area you felt someone behind you, you turned on your heel being met with Harry a few feet behind you. “Ello love” he greeted you with his deep English accent, “congratulations on the show, ‘t was incredible” he complimented with a genuine smile on his soft pink lips. You smiled back and slowly looked him up and down, observing his body in your design.

“Thank you, Harry. I’m glad you liked it. Lovely choice by the way” you said as you motioned towards his outfit with your hand.

“T’was hard too choose which one to wear if I’m ‘onest” he replied with a low chuckle as he stepped towards you a bit.

“You made the right choice, it’s one of my favourite designs I’ve done” you complimented as you leaned against the large marble counter, placing your almost empty drink on it “fits your body perfectly” you continued as you met your gaze with his again.

“It does doesn’t it?” He asked cheekily as he pulled at the top a bit with his ring clad hands. “Y’ look incredible, love the jumpsuit” he flattered as he moved about a foot closer, leaving only a few inches between the two of you.

You smirked “so charming” you replied as you gently touched his cheek while holding strong eye contact. You could feel his heart beating against your arm. You stared at each other for a few more seconds, almost as if you were having a conversation solely through eye contact.

“You need a drink” you smiled as you let your hand fall from his face and you spinned around as you made your way over to the bar.

Harry was completely stunned as he watched you walk over to the large bar, quickly grabbing all the ingredients for whatever drink you had decided he should drink. Being so close to you only moments before made his mind blur and his heart race. How could you just walk away when it seemed as if you were about to kiss him? Most people would jump at the chance. But he assumes most people would also jump at the chance to kiss you, he certainly would. He was taken out of his thoughts by your sweet voice. “Harry” you called for him from the bar, his name sounding like heaven coming out of your mouth like that.

“What’d ya make me love?” He asked as he walked over to you. You held out a glass filled with dark brown liquid and a single large ice cube in it.

“A Manhattan, it’s my favourite” you blinked sweetly at him, the sides of your mouth tugging up at the sides as he grabbed it mimicking your smile before taking a sip and making a face as though he’d just taken a shot. Your smile grew.

“S’very strong love, but good” he assured you.

“Mmm what’s the point of a drink if it’s not strong enough to burn” you replied, not as a question but rather a strong statement again hitting him with that beautiful stare. You picked up your own drink (the same as the one you’d made for him) and said a quick “cheers” before downing most of it. Harry was about to say something but was quickly inturrupted by a group of people entering the bar area.

The group consisted of a few people Harry knew, immediately recognizing Lizzo, ASAP Rocky, Gigi and Bella Hadid but there were a few others with them he didn’t know (or atleast didn’t recognize). The smile on your face grew into a wide grin as Bella squealed and said your name, engulfing you in a bear hug. “Bells!” You giggled lightly into her shoulder before releasing from the hug.

“The show was incredible Y/N. You’re a fucking genius” she praised as she walked behind the bar, still smiling widely.

“You walked in it love” you reminded her, giggling as you went to greet Rocky. The two of you hugged tightly before releasing, Rocky’s hands going up to cup your face.

“You killed it baby, just like you always do” he said as he kissed your nose. You could feel Harry’s eyes burning into the side of your head as he chatted along with lizzo.

“Mm thank you Rocky, you know you’re my muse” you grinned wider as you kissed both his hands in appreciation.

Harry couldn’t help but watch your interaction with Rocky, you seemed so comfortable, so intimate. Harry felt a pang of jealousy run through his stomach at you calling Rocky your “muse”. He brushed it off with a clearing of his throat as he turned his attention back to lizzo. “You good H? Uh oh. Y/N made you one of her manhattans didn’t she?” Lizzo laughed loudly looking down at the drink in his hands before hitting Harry’s shoulder playfully, the question bringing your attention to them.

“Hey! My manhattans are world renowned Mel” (Lizzo’s real name is Melissa) you said proudly as you took a few steps forward, closing the distance between you and the couple. You pulled Lizzo in for a hug “m glad you came” you said as the two of you pulled apart.

“Of course! The collection is legendary as per” she replied genuinely. You thanked her and gave her a kiss on the cheek before turning your attention to Harry.

“If you’ll excuse Harry and I, Mel. He was just about to escort me outside for a smoke” you informed her, all well making full eye contact with Harry.

“Mhmmm you two have fun, come get me for shots later”

Harry followed you outside onto the large open balcony, watching you greet people on the way, doing the same if he knew the person. As soon as the two of you stepped outside Harry watched you take a deep breath, tipping your head back slightly to take in the fresh air. It looked almost erotic, even though it was just a simple action it made all Harry’s senses tingle. “How do’ya know Rocky?” Harry asked seemingly out of nowhere, it almost shocked himself. He knew he tends to get jealous rather easily, and maybe even a little possessive but usually it only comes out with people he’s exclusive with, not a women he’s never even kissed. And yet, there it was. He tried to sound casual but worried he failed terribly. You turned your head to him with a slight smirk before licking your lower lip and chuckling slightly.

“Oh, we’ve known each other for a long time. Met him at a party when I was first starting out” you said nonchalantly before grabbing a pack of cigarettes off the small table that sat on the deck. Harry nodded, understanding that you were in no way going to give away the nature of yours and Rockys relationship.

“I listened through your album again this morning” you admitted, effortlessly changing the subject back to him while taking a long drag of the cigarette you had just lit. Harry tried his best to hide the grin appearing on his face as he stared at you,

“did ya?” He asked waiting for you to continue your thought.

“Mhm. Listened to it in the shower” you hummed, as you leaned forward against the railing in front of the two of you, taking in the view and breaking eye contact.

The thought of you listening to Harry sing while completely naked in the shower made his skin feel like it was on fire and all his blood rush down to his groin. “What’s y’ favourite song?” He asked, leaning his back against the railing right next to you and looking down at your face. You looked up at him and hummed in thought.

“She” you said with a thoughtful, almost devious smile before standing up straight and putting out your smoke.

“Let’s go do shots, yeah?” Harry nodded with an amused smile as you grabbed his hand and pulled him back into the hotel.

Four shots and two hours later Harry found himself sitting on one of the couches to the right side of the open living room, watching you dance along with your friends in the middle. You looked so free, so careless, so magical. He couldn’t keep his eyes off you, trying to listen to whatever Jeff was trying to tell him to his right. “You’re not paying attention are you man?” Harry heard Jeff ask through a laugh as he followed Harry’s eyeline straight to you. Harry pried his eyes away from you to look at Jeff

“sorry mate. I’m listenin’” Harry told him, not really trying to be convincing.

“She’s an actress y’know. Not literally, but she knows how to get what she wants, she always has. But she’s got a good heart, just be careful alright?” Jeff said to him, patting his knee before standing up and walking over to glenne who was stood at the other side of the room.

Harry sat, watching you as he went over what Jeff had said to him a few moments ago. “She’s an actress”. Did he have to be careful? You didn’t look dangerous, but you did scare him a little. Not because he thought you’d physically hurt him or anything, but he knew if he’d let you, you could dig deep into his already fragile heart. Break it, possibly like it hadn’t been before.

Harry was brought out of his thoughts by seeing you turn your body towards where he was sitting, breaking yourself out of the group of friends that surrounded you. You made eye contact with Harry and motioned for him to come to you with your perfectly manicured right hand. You weren’t smiling, but he could see a glint of something he thought was amusement in your eyes. He got up and walked over to you. “You motioned fo’ me love?” He asked as he approached, a small smirk apparently on both your lips.

“Mhm, come” you said as you offered him your hand. He took your small hand in his as you ushered him through the growing crowd.

The two of you walked all the way through the living room, and passed the kitchen before entering a smaller room to the left of the kitchen. As you entered Harry took in his surroundings, it appeared to be an office space. There was a glass table in the center of the room with a large plate decorated with multiple lines of white powder on it, along with three chairs; one blue velvet and the other two grey of the same material. There were a few other people in the room, but Harry didn’t recognize them. “Some privacy please loves” you said aloud, asking them to leave Harry and yourself alone in the space. The strangers immediately obliged when they saw you, muttering greetings as they exited. You turned around to face Harry who was standing only slightly behind you.

“do you fancy a line Harry?” You asked, your hand coming up to touch his shoulder lightly.

“S’ a party innit?” He agreed, making you smile all too innocently given what he was agreeing to was quite the opposite. You walked over to the plate of narcotics, picking up the metal straw from beside it before holding it up to your nose. You bent over the table, flipping your hair over to the right side to make sure it didn’t get in the way as you breathed in deep through your nose inhaling a thick line of the powder. Harry watched as you stood up straight, tipping your head back and inhaling through your nose to make sure you got it all. You let out a cheery giggle before holding the straw out to Harry. He took it and did the same.

Just as Harry stood up straight you gently carressed his left cheek, staring into his blown out pupils. “God, you’re somethin’ else” he spoke just below a whisper, only loud enough for you to barely hear. He brought his large ring filled hand up to your waist as your hand fell from his cheek to his neck. He applied pressure to your waist encouraging you to move so your bum was pushed against the glass table. Once you obliged he moved even closer to you so your noses were practically touching, his hand moving to smooth itself over your back to hold you in place.

“Can I kiss you?” He asked, his voice much lower and more raspy than it had been. His eyes filled with desperation and lust. Instead of responding you giggled lightly and pulled him in by his neck, connecting your lips. The kiss was slow and messy, but filled with an undying passion. Your left hand squeezed his neck slightly, egging him on as one of his hands went to cup your jaw while the other one steadied on your waist. You opened your mouth slightly, inviting him in which he immediately took advantage of, sliding his tongue into your mouth. Both your lips were slightly numb from the coke but it did nothing but intensify the feeling. He tasted like whiskey and peppermint, making your head dizzy (in the most incredible way). You let your hands drop down to his waistband, slowly untucking the button down from his trousers and beginning to undue the buttons. Your eagerness made a low groan erupt from the back of his throat, feeling his boner growing rapidly at your touch. You broke the kiss as you finished unbuttoning his shirt, both of your breathing unsteady. He watched as you ran your hands up his torso slowly before pushing his sleeves off his wide shoulders. You made eye contact with him as he went to kiss you again, you stopped him shaking your head. You bent your head down slightly and licked his chest, starting from the top of his butterfly tattoo and ending just under his jaw. The feeling driving Harry completely insane with lust, goosebumps appearing all over his body as he let out a throaty moan

“y’ drivin’ me fuckin’ crazy” he said as you came up, standing up straight.

“Sit” you spoke, pointing at the large blue velvet chair next to you, not breaking eye contact. You could still hear the booming music and people taking from the other rooms as you watched him sit. You turned around so your back was facing Harry as you undid the tie that held up the top part of your jumpsuit letting it fall down, exposing your entire torso and back.

You heard Harry mutter a low “fuck” as you turned around and positioned yourself on top of him, successfully straddling his lap.

You could feel the exceedingly large bulge through his pants pressing against your crotch as he began kissing down your neck and towards your breasts causing you to moan slightly.

“Please Harry” you said breathlessly, giving him some control as you began slowly grinding back and forth against him.

“Tell me princess. Tell me what ya want” he raspily requested as he gripped onto your hips with both his hands, guiding your movements.

“I want you to fuck me harry, I want you to use me” you said still grinding against him while looking down slightly into his eyes as he stared back up at you. Without hesitation he lifted you, firmly holding onto your bum as he stood up and set you down on the table.

“Lift up love” he ordered, you leaned back on your hands and lifted up for bum so he could pull down the remaining part of your jumpsuit. After discarding the material to the side, taking your nude pumps along with it, he took a moment to take in your practically naked body. You grinned widely at his reaction as he began to grope your boobs, once again connecting his lips with yours. You reached your hands down to undo the button of his pants, using your skilled fingers you got them down in record time. You looked back up at him to see his eyes already staring at you. You placed your hands on either side of his face while his still ran along your nude body.

“Please Harry, I need your cock” you whispered seductively causing his whole body to go into overdrive.

He quickly pulled down his already undone trousers and boxers before sliding your peach coloured thong to the side, feeling your dripping pussy with his index finger and letting out an animalistic groan. You watched as he grabbed his large dick with his left hand, lining himself up at your entrance before turning his gaze back to your face. You both held eye contact as he entered you. The feeling completely overwhelming both of you, you leaned your head back, gripping roughly onto his back as you both let out a strangled moan. “Fuck” you moaned “you’re so big”. Your words egging him on, he picked up his pace pumping in and out of you slow but rough. He kept his focus on your face, watching as you moaned his name and praised him. You looked like a complete wet dream, your eyes barely open, your head tilted back as you stared at him through your eyelashes refusing to break eye contact.

“Good girl.... y’ take me so fucking good” he moaned, his ringed fingers digging harshly into your hips as his grip tightened. You lifted your head and moved your hands to his neck pulling him in closer so that his face was not even an inch away from yours.

“Harder Harry, fuck me harder” you moaned, completely out of breath. He started pounding into faster, all the sounds of the hectic party just outside completely drowned out by the sound of his balls slapping harshly against you and your shared moans. You finally broke eye contact when you leaned your head to the side and began leaving messy wet kisses along his jaw before meeting his neck with your mouth. You bit down roughly onto the skin of his neck earning a throaty moan from him. You licked over the spot you’d just bitten, soothing the pain a bit before he pulled your head back, balling your hair into his fist so you would look at him.

“Dirty little princess y’ are... leavin’ marks on me” he growled into your mouth before rejioning your lips to his and continuing his relentless pace with his hips.

You could feel your orgasm approaching rapidly, the overwhelming tingling travelling all throughout your body, all your senses becoming increasingly clear. “Y’ gonna cum fo’ me love?” He asked as he felt your walls becoming even tighter around his shaft. You nodded rapidly.

“Such a good girl... s’ fuckin tight” he said in between breathless moans.

“Cum fo’ me princess, I wanna feel you” he repeated, moving his right hand from its place on your waist to rub your clit, matching the pace of his hips. You could feel it happening, your vision blurred, your toes curling, your legs shaking rapidly as you dig your nails deep into Harry’s black, holding on for dear life.

“Fuck, Harry. Fuck” you repeated over and over as you came hard around his thick cock.

“Fuck Y/N, y’ gonna make me cum” he moaned into your neck as you held onto his shoulders.

“Cum for me harry, please” you whispered in his ear between moans of your own. You could feel his body start to weaken as he twitched inside of you, about to cum. You wrapped your legs around his hips tightly and pulled him in closer as he let out a loud raspy moan. You felt thick ropes of cum shoot deep inside you.

Once he came down from his high he kept his head rested on your shoulder, your arms and legs still wrapped tightly around him, both of you desperately trying to catch your breath. After a few seconds you both released, your legs falling down beside his as he stood. You made eye contact and you giggled lightly making him smile boyishly. Both of your hair a complete and utter mess, breathing heavily, and completely naked. The plate of cocaine that once sat on the side of the table was now shattered on the floor. “Your insane” Harry said before he laughed looking around the room, really taking in everything that happened. You laughed with him as you hopped off the table and walked over to where he had thrown your jumpsuit and shoes.

“I’m going to assume you meant that as a compliment.” You said as you pulled your jumpsuit up over your nude body.

“F’ course love. You’re a fuckin minx” he complimented as he buttoned up his shirt.

“You’re not so bad yourself, Harry” you shot back with a quick wink as you finished putting you shoes on.

End note: Ahh thank you so much for reading!! I’m kind of nervous about posting this, so please let me know what you thought! I’d seriously appreciate it. And if you liked it please please reblog :) I know the ending is kind of abrupt but it’ll make sense in the next part. Also, there will be ANGST coming up !

#fanfic #smut #harry styles x fem!reader #harry styles x y/n #harry styles x you #harry styles #solo harry #harry x reader #series #fanfiction #fandom #fine line #oneshots #x reader

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maybege · 3 years

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hi, elle here

1 where can I sign up for Paz dreams because ... hon

2 I'm obsessed with specifically the way you characterize Paz, even in headcanons or tiny au thoughts. he gets so little screen time but you always nail how deeply he cares and also.. how he's a very capable man who cannot keep his mouth shut when he's feeling passionate. you're spot on and I love it [chef's kis]

Hi Elle, did I tell you yet that you’re the best and I love you? 🥺😭

I don’t have a coherent answer to this because I’m just so 🥺🥺🥺🥺 thank you????? 🥺🥺🥺🥺 honestly at this point writing Paz is something so comforting to me, I’m sometimes afraid I’ve lost all touch to the character and just project my own wishful thinking onto him and then you come in with your kindness and your comments and I’m just 😭😭😭😭😭 thank you

#may answers

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dreatine · 3 years

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Fic: Goodbye, Hello, Salvation

Title: Goodbye,Hello, Salvation

Author: dreatine

Rating: G

Characters: Spencer Reid and Jennifer Jareau

CMBingo2020 Square: Goodbye Letter

Disclaimer: CBS owns all

Notes:Thanks to Sharon and Edgar for making sure this is coherent

Notes 2: The title is a play on the MASH finale title:Goodbye,Farewell,Amen

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Parking in the driveway, JJ turned off the ignition and laid her head on the steering wheel. She still couldn’t believe what happened, she still hadn’t processed it yet.

Spencer was gone.

Emily had called an emergency meeting this morning to tell them that Reid had resigned. Everyone was shocked, talking all at once, asking questions. Emily told them that Spencer left his badge,gun and a note saying that he needed a break after everything that happened in the last year or so. Prison,dealing with Cat, his mom, the cult, he told Emily that he needed to do something different. Everyone was wondering especially Penelope if he’d ever come back. JJ did her best to comfort her, reassuring her that he would be back but she wasn’t so sure. Of all the things he mentioned that caused him to leave, he didn’t mentioned LA and JJ wondered if what happened at the jewelry store was a part of it. She knew him well enough that he wouldn’t have said anything to the team. But, his demeanor after that case was distant, quiet, especially when he asked her at Rossi’s wedding if she was telling the truth about her confession.

She never intended to tell him her feelings. Not in a million years. And instead of definitively telling him no, she cowardly stayed silent, letting Spencer wonder if she meant it. And JJ honestly didn’t mean to be evasive, it was just she still hadn’t decided herself what her true feelings were about everything,

Partially what she was said was true, and partially not. She did love Spencer. That was true. And it wasn’t just as a brother/sister love either, no matter how much she told herself that’s all it was. The love she had was somewhat romantic in nature, she couldn’t deny it. She wondered over the years, why she was overprotective of him or why she was shocked when she found out about Maeve, telling herself that it was because he was her best friend and she wanted only what was best for him. But, that was not the whole truth. she now realized that a part of her had been a little in love with him or the idea of him, that clouded her reactions to Maeve, to Austin, to the others, that caused her protectiveness of him over the years.

The one thing she hadn’t known or if she’d ever known, if he’d felt the same way. He was so hard to read sometimes,if not most of the time even though they were best friends. She’d told him once that there was a part of him that he never showed anyone and she wondered if he’d ever would. ’Why do you care?’ she asked herself, not wanting to answer the question.

Rubbing her hands over her face, she took a deep breath and opened the car door. She had to pull herself together. Walking to the mailbox, she retrieved her mail. Flipping through, her breath caught. A simple, white envelope with familiar handwriting was staring back at her.

It was from Spencer.

Walking briskly up the walk, she entered her house and quickly shut the door. Dropping her things on the kitchen table, she grabbed the envelope and sat in her favorite chair. Settling in, she opened the letter and began to read.

Dear JJ,

If you’re reading this, then it meant I left the team. I needed to. After everything, I had to leave for my own health. For a long time, even before prison, I’ve felt I’m losing parts of myself to this job and I was starting not to recognize who I am anymore. And I knew if I stayed, I’d lose myself forever. So, I had to leave.

I know what you’re thinking. You’re wondering if what transpired in LA contributed to my leaving and I’ll be honest with you, it’s a part of it. I’m sorry. I didn’t want you to feel guilty but I’m not going to lie to you now.

You’re confession stunned me because I didn’t expect it at all. I thought you’d say surely something else to diffuse the situation but when you said ‘You always loved me’, I didn’t know what to think. I thought you might be lying but while earlier you said I didn’t know your tells, but playing poker and confessing secrets are two different things. And I knew there was something more. But, when I confronted you at the wedding, your evasiveness confirmed my initial thoughts.

I knew that there was truth in your confession. How much, I still don’t know but you weren’t lying outright. I know not because I’m a profiler but because I’ve been your friend for 15 years and I know you well.

You’re my best friend and always have been, Our relationship had been so close, almost like siblings. You’re the sister I wished I had growing up and every instance of closeness we’ve shared over the years, I’ve felt a deep, familial love that’s made me consider you my sister in every way but blood.

And because of how much I cherish our friendship, the awkwardness that has been happening between us has been distressing. I don’t want this to not only affect our friendship but affect everything else, it’s best for everyone for me to leave.

Please don’t try to find me, nor get Garcia to find me. I told Emily the same thing. I need to be away from the BAU and knowing where I am, will not make me heal.

Tell everyone I love them and especially Henry and Michael that I love them more than I can say, and I’ll be back someday.

Love, Spencer

Folding up the letter, JJ started to cry, knowing that nothing would ever be the same.

******

Meanwhile at LAX:

Spencer took a deep breath as he walked down the corridor. He was both excited and nervous at the same time. It had been a long time since he’d seen her but he’d thought of her often. When he decided to leave the BAU, one of his thoughts was to see her, wanting to reconnect with her in a meaningful way that he should have done all those years ago. His salvation, he truly believed.

Coming out of the tunnel, Spencer glanced around, smiling widely when he spotted her. Walking over to her, he smiled brightly.

“Hello, Reid.”

“Hello, Elle.” he replied. "Call me Spencer.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The End

#cmbingo #cmbingo2020 #spencer reid #spencer reid fanfiction #dreatine fics

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reidology · 4 years

Text

He Was A Skater Boy… (Chapter 6) (Hotch/Reid)

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner / Spencer Reid

Summary: "Spencer, everything I’ve done for you is not about emotion, it's about justice. I advise you to get over yourself, the BAU is bigger than you and your little friend. Once he stops wasting your time you can go back to thinking rationally.”

Word Count: 3.4k

(I know it’s been a long wait, so I hope this longer chapter is worth it! <3)

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5

Chapter 6: I don't wanna make it, I just wanna- (AO3)

It was dark and raining out, but inside the warm comfort of Gideon’s cabin the sound of the rain pittering against the windows was relaxing. Finally, this Wednesday Gideon wasn’t away on a case, so Spencer has made his way to his cabin for their weekly chess dinners. At the door he was greeted by his mentor with a question rather than, well, a greeting, “How would you identify an injury as hesitant or otherwise?”

It’s not that Spencer didn’t appreciate everything Gideon was doing for him, he just sometimes wondered why they couldn’t ever have normal conversations. Talk about normal things, confide in each other. He already thought of the older man as a father figure, he wished Gideon would take in interest in his personal life. Granted, Spencer didn’t have a personal life until like last week. The lack of personal connection between them made him tick, why does it always have to be business? How about a ‘Hello Spencer, sorry about last week, let’s catch up!’, was that really so unthinkable?

Yes, Spencer was still pissed about Gideon leaving for a case with the BAU without even letting him know that he had rejoined the BAU . The place he’d been groomed to work for since he was thirteen by Gideon himself.

“A hesitation mark would be a shallow, perhaps uneven cut as opposed to a clean, deep wound that would reach past the epidermis of the victim’s skin.” Spencer answered dully. Too easy. The old man let him in and Spencer settled at his usual spot at the dinner table.

They ate in relative silence, meaning Gideon talked and Spencer listened, as per usual. The reason Gideon went on the case was to butter Spencer up to the team and introduce the idea of letting Spencer on. Spencer pointed out that he hasn’t even joined the academy yet and he’s already considering the BAU?

“Trust me, Reid, I know what’s good for you,” was the only response he got.

How come Gideon couldn’t tell him about this beforehand? After all, this is about him . This is his future! A simple head’s up is all Spencer wanted, a sign that he was in control of his own life. But of course, that would’ve gone right over Gideon’s head.

After Spencer helped clean up the dinner, they settled into a chess game. It was a welcomed distraction from the frustrations of the earlier conversation. But Spencer should’ve known his luck always runs out.

“I almost forgot,” Gideon began in his usual monotone, “Rossi has agreed to meet with you for a little chat over at the office.”

This had Spencer seething. He pretended not to hear him, focusing instead on his next move. If you have nothing nice to say , he thought, say nothing at all .

“It’s tomorrow evening, you should bring your resume. And your dissertation”

Spencer moved his knight to E5.

He didn’t look up, “I’m busy tomorrow evening.”

Aaron was taking him to the skatepark to teach him how to kick-flip and maybe do… other things. Gideon appeared to be surprised by this reaction, as if Spencer should be jumping with joy at the prospect of meeting with another old man to discuss how else he can be used.

“Spencer, this isn’t really something you can blow off. This is important.”

“So is this! I have plans with Aaron and I am going to see them through. Rossi can reschedule.”

“Who is Aaron? And how could he be more important than this?”

“You would know if you ever asked about how I’m doing.”

Gideon kept looking right through him, unimpressed. He set his Queen to E5, taking Spencer’s knight. Spencer tried not to choke up.

He tells him about how Penelope urged him to socialize more, and get out of his comfort zone. About how he goes to study and read at the skatepark, how he met Aaron there, and offered to tutor him. His voice got small when he let slip that Aaron kissed him.

“A-and that’s why I need to tutor him tomorrow, his midterms are soon.”

It was a bit of a lie hidden in truth, but he couldn’t tell Gideon his plan was to suck face with the skater he met two weeks ago.

Gideon’s silence was deafening. Spencer shakily moved his pond to C4, after all it’s not every day you accidentally come out to your prehistoric mentor.

“This boy is a distraction. So is Penelope. She has been trying to control you for months, I knew it was a bad idea for you to see her. She’s feeding you lies, filling you with emotional dandruff, and putting you on the wrong path. Spencer, everything I’ve done for you is not about emotion, it is about justice. I advise you to get over yourself, the BAU is bigger than you and your little friend. Once he stops wasting your time you can go back to thinking rationally.”

Spencer has no means to hide the tears streaking his cheeks. Or the ones falling onto the board. He wants to tell Gideon that the BAU is his dream, not Spencer’s, that the only one controlling his life is him. Penelope has shown him that there’s more to life than just being a convenient supercomputer. He feels alive for the first time ever, he hopes Gideon will understand.

“I made a promise to a friend,” his lips trembled, “I can’t betray that.”

“No, you made a commitment to the FBI, to helping people, to catching monsters. Now you’re going to meet with David Rossi tomorrow or the past five years of your life will have been meaningless. It’s your choice, Spencer.”

He made a final move on the board. “Check mate.”

The message was clear. Gideon or Aaron.

Later that night, lying in bed, he texted Aaron:

Spencer: I can’t meet you tomorrow. It’s best if we don’t meet at all anymore.

The reply came in immediately,

Aaron: wdym? are you ok?

Spencer was too emotional to respond. He tried to go to sleep but his phone kept vibrating.

Aaron: is this a gay freak out?

or is it a me thing?

...

Spencer please just let me know you’re alright.

Spencer: I’ll be alright if you leave me alone.

Sending that to Aaron felt like a cut deep in his chest, he’d never been so cruel before. No reply came and he began to doze off into oblivion, he was about to drift when his phone vibrated again.

Aaron: fine, but I need my sweater back.

—————————————

Ever since Aaron had met this kid, he hasn’t been able to form a single coherent thought. The genius with hidden wit and geeky sarcasm already held so much power over him. Spencer had the compassion of a nurse, the most dazzling smile he’d ever seen, and eyes to draw him in and drown him in the deep end. Spencer could ask him to jump off the moon and he’d happily oblige. But this, this wasn’t like jumping off the moon. This was heartbreak.

I’ll be alright if you leave me alone.

The words flashed onto the screen and knocked the breath out of him. That message hurt worse than an ankle sprained a hundred times over. Nothing Spencer could say could make him believe that what they had, whatever they were building up to, didn’t mean anything. Something wasn’t right and Aaron was determined to find out exactly what. He couldn’t let this boy slip through the cracks, he couldn’t let him go before telling him exactly how he felt. But Spencer was stubborn, and he wouldn’t listen, he’ll shut himself out into isolation if Aaron doesn’t do something.

So he staged a coup. A devious plan to get Spencer running back into his arms. Ignoring the last text from Spencer, he replied ‘fine, but I need my sweater back.’

—————————————

Spencer has a plan. A plan to return Aaron’s sweater without actually seeing him. He plans to leave the clothing on the halfpipe and be gone before the man in question even gets there. He gets to the skatepark early and sets the sweater down at his usual spot, but when he turns around he comes face-to-face with his kryptonite. Aaron knows him too well.

Shoes dangling around his neck, baggy band T-shirt, oversized corduroy pants, striped green socks, messy hair, and the ever-present skateboard tucked under his arm.. How can this man have such an effect on him?

“Spencer,” he flashed a crooked smile. Spencer didn’t smile back. This will be easier if he doesn’t show his true emotions.

The smile faded quickly when Spencer wordlessly handed him the folded sweater. He’d spent a few minutes smelling it before he left, just to commit the scent to memory.

Aaron swallowed nervously, “Just talk to me, please. I just want to know what I did.”

He reached for Spencer’s cheek but Spencer ducked away before he could. Why is he making this harder than it has to be.

“You didn’t do anything. It’s me. I can’t do this, I have to go. I have a meeting.”

Spencer stepped around the taller man, but Aaron grabbed his arm, “No, stay, please let’s talk about this.”

“I can’t.” He shrugged him off and walked away. Leaving Aaron even more confused and heartbroken than before. Little did he know Spencer’s heart was broken too.

———————————————-

David Rossi is an old Italian man with an affinity for classic cars and Cuban cigars. Spencer knows this because within ten minutes of meeting the man, the words ‘carbonara’ and ‘vintage’ had been uttered at least seven times. He seemed all right, Spencer liked that he hadn’t mentioned his age or his intelligence yet. Rossi introduced him to another younger agent before disappearing to his office with Gideon.

Elle Greenaway is… as intimidating as she looks. She may be shorter than Spencer but her height does not deter her from being absolutely vicious. The words ‘scrawny’ and ‘privilege’ may have been thrown around (to his face) many, many times. Nevertheless, she seemed genuinely interested in Spencer.

You see, he’d been dragged to the BAU by Gideon, to have this meeting with THE David Rossi, and he’d been sulking the whole way there. He remained polite and tried, really he tried, to act like he wanted to be there. But his mind was stuck on the day’s previous events. How could Aaron have changed his life so quickly? His universal perspective was completely skewed. He imagined the look on Aaron’s face when he finds out that David Rossi offered to cook him dinner at his mansion. The way his lip would quirk up as if to say ‘you’re joking, right?’ and the bright smile and wide eyes of excitement when he realizes that it’s the truth and the way his big hands would pull him in for a slow passionate kiss…

“Hey! Kid!”

Spencer broke out of his daydream at Agent Greenaway’s shrill voice and the snap of her fingers in front of his face. She looked amused, if not a little pissed-off at being ignored. “I asked you a question, what’s got you looking so miserable?”

By now he should know that this woman is direct and abrasive but unapologetic, he could respect that, but he was still caught off guard by the bluntness of the question. A panicked little squeak left his throat which totally betrayed the cool exterior he’d been faking this whole time. “Don’t even try to lie to me either, I’ll know.” Was that a threat?

“I- I’m not miserable.” He replied, miserably.

She did not believe that for a second. Greenaway took a glance around her bullpen then gestured to an empty office with a round table, “Sit down, Einstein. I’ll be right back.”

Spencer sat on one of the chairs, looking around he noticed a case board full of newspaper clippings, crime scene photos, maps, and more. Could he see himself sitting here, day after day, chasing monsters? He didn’t have time to entertain that thought before Elle came back and closed the door behind her. She placed a steaming cup of coffee in front of him. “ Oh thank god, ” He let out without thinking, she just chuckled at his embarrassment and took a seat across from him.

“I know a caffeine deficiency when I see one. But that’s not all it is, is it? Spill, Pretty Boy or I’ll make sure Rossi never lets you step foot in this building again.”

They both knew she wasn’t serious, no matter how convincing she sounded, but Spencer let up anyway. After taking a long sip of the scorching coffee, he shrugged, “Maybe that wouldn’t be so bad,” his gaze remained trained on the coffee sloshing around his cup, “Maybe that’s what I want.”

“You don’t want to be here?” Elle asked quizzically. “I thought you were ‘the genius to put us all to shame!’ ‘the BAU’s missing link!’ ‘the kid who’s gonna change the game !’ That’s all Gideon’s been talking about for years.”

Spencer shook his head and reddened at the way Gideon’s been talking about him to these special agents, “Gideon he… he doesn’t know what I want. He doesn’t understand.” He wants Aaron. He wants to feel wanted, not just… useful .

“And what is it you want?”

At that he took another sip of coffee, it really could use some sugar, how long of a sip does he need to take before Greenaway changes the subject? He couldn’t answer that.

A knowing smirk grew on the older agent’s face, “Ahh… or should I ask, who is it you want?”

Spencer only choked a little bit.

“Wh-what? No, no i-it’s not a- who it’s uh-”

“What’s her name?” Her head was propped up on her hand, leaning over as if that would get him to spill all his secrets.

After some hesitation, he relented, deep breath in, “His name.”

Elle didn’t look surprised, just corrected herself, “What’s his name, then?” Deep breath out. It’s safe.

He tried to suppress a grin when he answered, but it was nearly impossible not to smile when thinking of Aaron Hotchner.

“His name is Aaron. He’s a law student, I met him at the skatepark. But I... I can’t see him anymore. He’s a distraction.”

Elle’s eyebrows shot up at that, “Is that what Gideon told you?”

He nodded. She made her disapproval clear with a roll of her eyes and a tsk .

“Listen, kid. Gideon’s an old man stuck in his glory days. You’ve got the rest of your life to work for the FBI. You’re only nineteen for Christ’s sake! Do you even know how many wives Rossi’s had? Too many. But he’s one of the best profilers I’ve ever met. Love isn’t a distraction, Spencer, it’s an asset. Go chase your dream guy, the BAU isn’t going anywhere.”

At that, she got up and went to leave, not before saying, “I better not see you for at least another decade, kid.”

She was right, and Spencer had a sweater to reclaim.

———————————————-

By the time Gideon drove him home, it was nearly 11pm, Spencer was exhausted from socializing with the team and talking about his genius intellect for hours. But he was determined to fix the rupture he’s created.

He’s been an avoidant ass to Aaron. He knows he doesn’t deserve to be forgiven. But he’ll be damned if he doesn’t try. He dug around the garage, making sure not to wake his mother, and found his old bike. And helmet, of course. He grabbed his satchel and made his way to Aaron’s dorm building in the dark. He wouldn’t risk texting Aaron in advance and being turned down or ignored. He left the bike in the grass and made his way up to Aaron’s door, attempting to catch his breath.

Before knocking he made sure he still had the gift in his bag. After his talk with Agent Greenaway earlier, he thought about how he could apologize. He wanted it to be meaningful, so he brought a gift. Spencer held his breath and knocked three times. He practiced his speech in his head, Aaron, I am so sorry I treated you like you were disposable. My mind was clouded with doubt about my future, but I never should have let that get in the way of you. You mean so much to me, Aaron, would you let me-

The door opened and it revealed a disheveled, bloodshot, miserable figure. Aaron had clearly been crying. It was almost midnight and Aaron had been up crying because of him. Spencer was such an asshole, how could he have done this to the only person to ever treat him like a normal guy? The guilt swallowed him whole and the practiced words left his mind. How could he fix this?

“Spence?” Aaron has never sounded so small .

Spencer blubbered, feet stuck to the ground. His mouth opened but no words came out. Aaron shifted his feet and looked down at the ground.

“What are you doing here?”

Spencer swallowed his pride.

“I came to apologize. I know I really fucked up. You don’t have to forgive me but I- I hope you’ll give me another chance.”

Aaron looked up at him, analyzing his face, surprised at Spencer’s words. After today he thought Spencer was completely done with him. He sniffed and saw Spencer’s guilt build-up in his shoulders.

“Here… I got you this. I know it isn’t much but…”

Spencer opened his satchel and fussed around for the gift, he handed it to Aaron who took his hands out of his pockets with shaking arms. His eyes widened.

“David Rossi’s new book? It doesn’t get released for another month.”

“Open it.”

Aaron opens the cover and falls silent.

“Scars remind us where we've been. They don't have to dictate where we're going.”

“How did you get an autographed copy of my favorite author’s unreleased novel?”

“It’s a long story, but essentially there was a lot of begging.”

Aaron stood a while in uffish thought, staring down at the book, stroking the spine of it. Then he gave a little smirk at, “Begging, huh?” There was a glint in his eyes. The mischievous glint Spencer thought he had put out forever.

“Yeah, you should’ve seen it. I was on my knees and everything.”

Aaron smiled. “I want a real explanation, but right now I just want to kiss you. Can I kiss you?”

Spencer was in his arms before Aaron could finish the question. “You never have to ask.”

Aaron wasted no time grabbing Spencer’s face and crashing their lips together. Spencer immediately melted into it, clutching at the other’s hoodie, trying to get closer to that heavenly heat. Aaron broke away caressing the younger man’s face and pressed his forehead to his temple, “Stay,” he whispered.

Spencer nodded vigorously and was pulled across the threshold into the room. The door was kicked closed with Spencer pressed up against it. Aaron slotted their lips back together and draped an arm around Spencer’s small frame, the other landing in his hair. Spencer’s lips parted to let the taller man in, the sensation washed over him and made his toes curl. Using his hold on Spencer’s hair, Aaron directed his head up, exposing the pale expanse of his neck. He peppered kisses and nipped and sucked until Spencer made those irresistible sounds Aaron had been dreaming about. He licked behind his ear and Spencer let out a whine, God, Aaron could watch him come undone all day.

“A-Aaron.”

Aaron hummed as he slipped a hand under Spencer’s button-up shirt.

“Aaron, wait.”

Spencer tapped lightly at his arm and Aaron stopped what he was doing.

“What’s wrong?” Wow, he sounded wrecked.

“Nothing’s wrong, I promise. I just don’t want to do this like… this. Our first time shouldn’t be rushed,”

Aaron nods and hums his approval in Spencer’s neck.

“Let’s go to bed?” Spencer cards his fingers through Aaron’s thick hair. The man pulls him in for a sweet kiss, then pulls him toward the bed.

“Anything you want, sweetheart.”

#spencer reid #aaron hotchner #aaron hotchner x spencer reid #hotchreid #hotch x reid #spencer reid fanfic #aaron hotchner fanfic #criminal minds #matthew gray gubler #mgg #thomas gibson #my fic #skater boy

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outer-bnks · 4 years

Text

Two Burning Hearts Are Dared To Break (JJ x OC) Ch. 5

In which Elle finds a drunk Rafe on the beach after her fight with JJ and turns to him for comfort.

Warning: mild swearing, mentions of underage drinking, mentions of being drunk/intoxicated

A/N: this gif is something else!!! Drew Starkey deserves more scenes in s2, just saying!! Was really fun to write Rafe as a big softie and explore their history together. Elle doesn’t know that Rafe killed the Sheriff. This chapter gives a little bit more info on Elle’s background and her relationships with the other characters. Also this chapter kind of made me wonder whether Rafe would be a good match for Elle.

Who should she end up with, JJ, Rafe or Topper? Let me know.

Word count: 2k

She had ended up at the beach at the bottom of her house. It wasn’t a surprise that this is where she’d end up, the water glowing in the moonlight, the waves calmly washing onto the shore. It had been a few hours since she had left JJ’s house, her mind still reeling over what had happened between them. The tears had long gone, but the churning in her stomach felt like it wasn’t ever going to end. Watching her feet as she walked along the water's edge, she heard quiet muttering coming from the beneath the tree line.

Walking towards the sound cautiously, she caught sight of a figure moving up into a sitting position, “Hello?”, the mystery person sounded. She recognised that voice, sighing at the realisation.

“Rafe? What’re you doing here?” Elle questioned as she moved to inspect the situation more, his face coming into focus.

“What does it look like?” he responded, arms out wide. Elle remained silent, taking note of his tear-stained face and the slight vulnerability that came through in his voice.

“Want some?” he offered, outstretching his hand holding up an almost empty bottle of whiskey. She shook her head, taking a seat next to him, holding her bent legs close to her chest. They sat in silence for a few minutes.

“What’s up with you?” he asked confusedly.

Keeping her eyes on the water so as to not give her emotions away, she asked “What do you mean?”

“Well aren’t you supposed to be with your Pogue friends in The Cut, instead of sitting here with a kook, drinking Whiskey on Wednesday night?”. He was right. She should be with her friends right now, grieving, sharing memories, eating, Elle would’ve been happy doing anything with them right now.

She remained quiet, moving her gaze away from the water to her feet in the sand, not able to find the courage to open up to Rafe of all people yet.

“Did something happen?” he asked softly, wary of pressing too hard, after picking up on her defeated body language.

She scoffed, “You could say that”.

He studied her side profile for a minute, “Do you wanna talk about it?”.

Elle let out a short chuckle. Never would she have imagined that she would be sitting next to a drunk Rafe considering telling him about her feelings.

So instead of doing just that, she put her defences up, sarcasm seeping into her tone “As if you care Rafe”.

He sighed, “I know I’ve been a dick-”

“You could say that again”

“but… things are different now”

“So what, I’m just supposed to forgive and forget all the times you’ve come after us? You, Kelce and Topper have nearly killed us, on more than one occasion”, she snapped, her eyes narrowing to finally look at him.

Rafe swallowed, his throat working at the seriousness in Elle’s tone. And although he was drunk and couldn’t form coherent thoughts, he felt himself sobering up at her words.

“No. You’re not. You shouldn’t forgive me at all. But you’re one of the only people who would actually understand how I feel right now, and it seems to me that you need someone just as much as I do”, his voice quieting at the last part of his sentence.

Elle searched his eyes, for the smallest glimmer of insincerity, silence falling upon them once again.

“It’s just that. Usually when I need someone to talk to, I go to John B. And now that he’s, um, gone, I don’t know who to turn to” she blurted out, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

Rafe masked his surprise at her outburst with sympathy, “Can you not talk to the others?”

“Hard to talk to them about the issue when they’re apart of it”, she sighed, twirling with the rings on her right hand. It was one of her nervous habits that she did without realising, along with playing with her earrings.

His eyebrows raised, finally understanding what she was upset about, “Oh”.

He paused for a minute, trying to gather his sober words amongst his drunk thoughts, “Maybe just give it some time? From what I’ve seen, you guys are like...real friends. That doesn’t just disappear after one fight”.

Elle nodded, his words somewhat comforting her.

They both looked back out to the water, a calmness washing over the both of them.

“Do you ever think that they might still be alive?”, he mumbled, taking another swig from the whiskey bottle.

She sucked in a breath, surprised at his question. Everyone was still too sensitive to talk about John B and Sarah, which made it hard for Elle to process her thoughts and emotions about the whole situation.

It was her turn to study his side profile, watching for any emotions to arise, “Yeah, sometimes. But holding on to that slim possibility, I don’t think it will do us too much good”, she confessed.

He nodded, looking at her quickly before turning back to the water, not wanting to see her reaction when he admitted this. “It was my fault”.

“What?” Elle questioned, her eyebrows furrowing.

“She’s my little sister. I was supposed to protect her. I’m supposed to protect my family”, his tone was rising, his frustration shining through.

She held a calm and steady voice, “Rafe, it’s not your fault.”

“Yes it is Elle! I’m the reason they got on that damn boat and drove into the storm.”

“Rafe you can’t think like that. You’ll tear yourself apart!”

“A little too late for that”, he scoffed. He ran both hands through his hair before resting his arms back onto the top of his bent knees.

Elle felt an urge to open up to him. To tell him about everything that she was feeling, about her grief and her anger and her loneliness.

She shifted in her position, moving into a crossed legged position. “JJ and I had a fight”.

Rafe waited for her to continue.

“He does this thing, when things become too much for him, he pulls away and tries to shut himself off. Usually you just need to give him time to cool off and he comes back to you. But I don’t know-” Elle shook her head “this time felt different.”

The words that came next didn’t need much preparation, “Well these circumstances are different Elle, he probably just doesn’t know how to cope. I’m sure he’ll come back to you. I doubt he’d ever give you up by choice, that kid’s like in love with you”, he finished, laughing lightly.

Elle laughed, stunned by his response, “What? No he’s not!”.

He shook his head, knowing she’d deny it. “Come on Elle, you’d have to blind- or just stupid, to not be able to see that he is head over heels for you”, he turned, watching as a glimmer of hope flickered in her eyes.

“Nah Rafe, you’re being dramatic”.

“Whatever you wanna believe Elle, but trust me on this,” he paused, maintaining eye contact with for, “if I had someone who cared about me the way that you care about him, I’d never let that go”.

Elle felt her heart swell slightly. Rafe hadn’t been this kind or honest to her, in a long time. She gave him a close-lipped smile, grateful for his words.

Elle watched as the wheels in his head turned, waiting for what question was coming next. Her and Rafe used to be good at this, at sitting and talking and asking each other questions about their lives.

When Rafe landed on the one he wanted to ask, he turned to her again, his eyes glazed over from his intoxicated state. “Is it fun being a Pogue?”

She took a minute to think about his question,“When you’re a Kook who doesn’t have to worry about money it’s fun. Why do you ask?”

He broke his gaze from her, looking down to the sand, drawing shapes into it with his index finger, “You guys just seem so… carefree?”. His statement came out more like a question.

“I guess. It’s easy for me to be carefree because I come from a privileged background, but uh, for the boys, there’s definitely a lot more to it. Can’t be all that carefree when you have to work 24/7 just to feed yourself and keep a roof over your head”. Her mind flashed back to JJ, the way it always seems to.

He brushed the sand off from his hand, “You know, if I was sober I definitely wouldn’t be saying this but” Elle’s heart quickened for a moment, worried about where this confession was going- “I have a lot of respect for you.”

She couldn’t help but let out a laugh. “Respect? Ever since I left the Kook Academy you’ve bullied the shit out of me”. Although what she had said was of a usually serious topic, Elle kept the smile on her face, amused by this conversation.

Rafe nodded, “I know I know. But leaving this lifestyle to be with people who you actually love, that makes you a far better person than I’ll ever be.” He hoped she wouldn’t question him further, he wasn’t ready to hurt her more than she already seemed to be.

Thankfully, she didn’t, “Never too late to be a good person Rafe”

Moments of silence passed before Rafe sighed addressing the elephant in the room, “I’m sorry. For everything.”

“I’m sorry too,” she responded, sincerity in her tone.

Rafe’s face contorted out of confusion, “What are you sorry for?”

“Well, after everything that happened with Archer, I kind of just... got up and left you guys” she said, bowing her head to look down at the sand.

He understood what she meant. Her departure from their friendship group had been abrupt, but for a good reason. He let out a soft laugh,“I don’t blame you, he was a piece of shit”.

“Yeah he was, but we were friends.”

“How do you trust people again after what happened with him?’’ he questioned quietly, afraid to open old wounds.

“Rafe we had a shitty relationship, it’s not like he ruined my life entirely” she laughed.

“It was more than a shitty relationship Elle. You didn’t deserve to be treated like that. And I should’ve told you about her as soon as I found out about it all”. Elle detected regret in his words, but the usual anger that she felt when thinking about Archer and her was absent. Even though it was an emotionally draining time for Elle, life seemed so much lighter back then compared to now.

“Can’t argue with that one.” she shot back, adding in a laugh to let him know that she wasn’t angry.

“Rafe-” she paused, unsure if she wanted to know the answer, “how long did you know about them before I found out?”.

“Uhm,” he hesitated, “maybe like 5 months?” he confessed regrettably.

Elle nodded her head slowly, processing his answer.

“If it’s any consolation, I beat the shit out of him for you”

Elle broke out into laughter. “Yeah I don’t doubt that, but thanks, I guess?”

His face broke out into a full smile, she couldn’t remember the last time she’d seen him smile like that, let alone be the reason for it.

“You’re welcome.”

A cool breeze washed over Elle making her shiver, deciding that now was probably a good time to get drunk Rafe home. “Hey, we should probably get out of here”.

“Yeah you’re right, I can feel my hangover coming already”.

Elle got out her phone, unlocking it and searching for one of the numbers she never thought she’d have to call again after leaving the Academy- Topper Thornton.

-----

Let know if you want to be added to the taglist!

Taglist: @mybillyhardgrove @cyrrusmreadings @downbytheouterbanks @belledutchess @imagines-and-preferences1216 @teamnick @lauraxwndrlnd @thehomeiknow

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scribbledghost · 3 years

Note

ghost, friend, my beloved.

I can tell right now. Im going to get hit with thoughts about your fic every time i reread it. I think ive reblogged every chapter now, so how can best I send you my praise and awe and appreciation in the future?

- elle

Elle my darling!!! You’ve given me so much support and love and I want you to know how grateful and appreciative I am. I am so lucky to exist in the world at the same time as you.

As for your question, you’re always welcome to send me inbox messages like this or private messages! Reblog it again if you’d like! Heck, mail me a letter if that’s what strikes your fancy! I love love love hearing your thoughts, no matter how lengthy or coherent they may or may not be 💖

#what I mean is #you could show up in my inbox and go ‘*insert fic here* AAAAHHHHHHHHH’#and I’d be more than okay with that lol #asked and answered #Elle

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taleofkngs · 3 years

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❤️

From lihua

send a heart for a kiss. accepting ; @fyrgebraec

Between the seasons, he found her, in a distant memory. His name, each time a different one on her tongue. She mesmerizes him. She bewitchs him. In her endless charm, she entraps him and will do so forever. And after many centuries, many lifetimes, she has found him again, like a ghost haunting him.

There is a smell of alcohol in his breath. Like a lifeless mannequin that can’t stand on its own, he is propped against a wall. His fingers dig deep into her arms as if she is the only solid thing in a dizzy, swaying world. Only now he realises that the droning music of the club he has just been in is gone, and that he can’t remember how or when he left, or when she found him. The music is over. And in his clouded, intoxicated mind, a coherent thought forms: for the music to be over so soon, for the music to be over just when it has begun, that is truly sad. What an awful fate.

Something is moved in him, but he can’t tell what. It is a quiet sensation that all elements of his body are being wrung out, and accumulate in the area where his heart is. In reaction, or perhaps instinctively, his hand clenches to his chest.

“Tell me”, his voice is a thunder in the quiet night air. “Why is it ---” He stops and looks at her, the ever ethereal being. And he wonders that maybe in a past life she was a princess. “Why is it that whenever I look at you, my heart hurts so much?”

It makes no sense. It has never made sense. And doesn’t seem like a mere fabrication of his mind that - in its drunken state - already inclines towards the melancholy.

“I have this dream”, he continues, their dark eyes darting light into each other. “I kiss you in that dream. I ---- I’m not trying to be rude ---- I’m not me in that dream. But we kiss. That’s all.”

Unable to comprehend the obvious, Rohan breathes in the crisp night air and looks at her for a while. Their rhythmic breathing is all that fills the silence between them. And drawn by the image of his dreams, he leans towards her. At first slowly, and unsure, and then when he finds no objection from her, he kisses her, softly, and with a swift graduation of intensity.

He is thankful that she has found him. And whenever fate shall tear them apart, he prays, that she always finds him. Because the music was over before it began.

#fyrgebraec #inbox.#verse: reincarnation.#( rohan said CONSENT )

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ingek73 · 4 years

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WORLD NEWS 08/01/2020 06:00 am ET

Meghan Markle, Prince Harry Fans Hatch ‘Unforgettable’ Plan To Mark Royals’ Birthdays

The Sussex Squad is at it again — this time with a scholarship #InspiredByMeghan.

By Carly Ledbetter

The Sussex Squad has something special in mind for Prince Harry and Meghan Markle’s birthdays.

Meghan Markle and Prince Harry both have birthdays coming up, which means one thing: the Sussex Squad has a plan.

The Sussex Squad is a group of supporters of the royal couple who regularly join forces around major holidays and birthdays to celebrate Meghan and Harry through charitable endeavors. Generally, organizers pick causes to contribute to, alert the rest of the Sussex Squad via social media of the effort and begin fundraising and donating in the days leading up to their deadline.

Dani Trin, a recent college graduate based in Portugal, helped create and oversee the latest campaign for Meghan’s birthday on Aug. 4 and Harry’s on Sept. 15.

Last week, she announced the “unforgettable” initiative on Twitter: scholarships for women’s education in partnership with the Campaign for Female Education, also known as Camfed. The non-profit organization works to eradicate poverty by educating African women.

The scholarships, dedicated to Meghan, is appropriately called the #InspiredByMeghan Scholarship. Donations from Sussex Squad members will support young African women through a year of technical and vocational training, specifically in the areas of nursing, engineering and journalism. As of Friday evening, the squad had raised more than $45,700.

HuffPost contacted Trin via email about the Sussex Squad’s history of charitable campaigns for their faves, how the most recent fundraising efforts came to be and what it’s been like getting recognition from the Duke and Duchess of Sussex.

The Squad first began organizing charitable efforts for the couple in 2018, when Meghan was pregnant with their son, Archie. The subsequent online movement was called the #GlobalSussexBabyShower and raised thousands of dollars for charities including Camfed, WellChild, which aids seriously ill children and Mayhew, an animal welfare group for which Meghan is a patron.

The Squad has since celebrated other major milestones in the couple’s life, leading a #HappyFathersDayPrinceHarry, which raised thousands for charities supported by Harry, and #ArchieDay, a celebration of Archie’s first birthday.

For the latter occasion, fans raised over $40,000 for coronavirus relief and, through the efforts of a separate group, planted over 111,500 trees in honor of the little one, along with donating to six charities focused on conservation.

This latest initiative is different, as all of the efforts are focused on one single charity, instead of three or four.

Trin wasn’t originally planning to do something for Meghan’s birthday, telling HuffPost she was burnt out from the organizing surrounding #ArchieDay. She’d also been focusing on graduating amid the worldwide pandemic.

But after someone asked her what she on tap as the next fundraising project on behalf of Harry and Meghan, she decided to do something for the duchesses’ birthday. She said that she’d been considering setting up a scholarship in Meghan’s name for some time and decided to go through with it.

“We were researching on how to set up scholarship funds and realized that it could get complicated having to deal with taxes and other people’s money,” she said. “So the best way to do it, it would be to have a non-profit organization to do it for us.”

Trin and fellow Squad member Elle Harris, who lives in New York and helped organize both the Global Sussex Baby Shower campaign and #ArchieDay, decided to partner with Camfed ― not only because of the work it does, but also due to the organization’s previous involvement with the duke and duchess and the Sussex squad. Harris told HuffPost that their last fundraising effort for Camfed led to 118 scholarships for young women.

WPA POOL VIA GETTY IMAGES

Journalist Anne McElvoy, Camfed Regional Director Zimbabwe’s Angeline Murimirwa, British campaigner Chrisann Jarrett, the Duchess of Sussex, Annie Lennox, Adwoa Aboah and former Australian Prime Minister Julia Gillard attend a panel discussion convened by the Queen’s Commonwealth Trust to mark International Women’s Day on March 8, 2019 in London.

Together, the two organized the new scholarship effort, communicating over the phone, Twitter and email, while Trin organized Zoom calls to coordinate with the non-profit. Over 100 members of the Squad knew about the project, but they were able to keep things under wraps until their chosen launch date ― a date chosen based on previous virtual fundraisers and the estimated length of time to run the campaign.

A Camfed spokeswoman told HuffPost by email on Wednesday that this sort of activism from fans of celebrities is “absolutely unique” in the group’s experience

“We are uplifted by, and in awe of what they are doing,” the spokeswoman said. “The Sussex Squad has turned its inspiration into concrete action to make the world a better place.”

Calling the scholarships “empowering,” she added, “With this #InspiredByMeghan fundraiser, the Squad has created a really purposeful movement for good on Twitter. It’s not only about being inspired, but also being inspiring. You can feel the passion, momentum, and the belonging this engenders, and we are really proud and energized to be part of it.”

Trin said she chose the hashtag #inspiredbyMeghan “because, for me personally, it is thanks to Meghan that I realized how female education is one of the most single important areas to work on to better society.” She added that she wants to bring awareness to the cause and help as many girls as possible to continue their education.

Harris echoed Trin’s thoughts and said the group is continually “inspired by the example set by Meghan and Harry in their humanitarian work.”

“We’ve always operated as more than the common fan group. We’ve strived to make our admiration for Meghan and Harry mean more than tweets and Instagram posts,” she said. “We hope to make a difference in the lived lives of promising girls and young women.”

The Camfed account has been tweeting updates on money raised and scholarships earned.

Trin’s fundraising efforts and online support of the Sussexes have earned her a call in the past from none other than the duke and duchess. She said they called to express their thanks for the fundraiser in honor of Archie’s birthday and the continued online support.

“I think I might have rambled a bit, I’m not sure, but I remember telling her how proud of them we all are and that we’ll be here supporting,” Trin said. “I’m surprised I was able to form coherent sentences.”

While the call was unexpected, Trin added that she didn’t consider it completely surprising. “Before she joined the royal family, Meghan was into connecting with people through her social media and blog,” she said.

After keeping the news to herself for a bit, Trin tweeted about the call and Sussex Squad members responded with glee.

“I feel like everyone was pretty excited. It’s always nice to get recognition from Harry and Meghan,” she said.

“I think Meghan will absolutely love this birthday gift. I would even go as far as to say we are giving her the best birthday gift this year,” she said, before quipping that the latest birthday fundraising efforts are going to put a little bit of pressure on the duke. “Tell Harry to step it up.”

#royals #meghan markle #prince harry #duchess of sussex #duke of sussex #duke and duchess of sussex #sussex squad #inspiredbymeghan #camfed #yay sussex squad #global sussex baby shower #archie day

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wolfpawn · 5 years

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I Hate You, I Love You, Chapter 38

Chapter Summary - Benedict and Sophie arrive for dinner, which is a nice affair. When Sophie gets Danielle alone, the pair speak about how it is to be the other half of the "Internet's Boyfriends."

Previous Chapter

Rating - Mature (some chapters contain smut)

Triggers - references to Tom Hiddleston’s work with the #MeToo Movement. That chapter will be tagged accordingly.

authors Note - I have been working on this for the last 3 years, it is currently 180+ chapters long. This will be updated daily, so long as I can get time to do so, obviously.

tags: @sweetkingdomstarlight-blog @jessibelle-nerdy-mum @nonsensicalobsessions @damalseer @hiddlesbitch1 @winterisakiller @fairlightswiftly @salempoe @lys-syl @youcantcatchafallingstar

If you wish to be tagged, please let me know.

“I see you fitted in some stress relief.” Benedict joked as he walked into the house, giving Tom a hug as he did.

“Do you two ever stop?” Sophie shook her head and laughed, having already entered and given Tom a similar hello. “I love this table.” She commented, looking at the table that Danielle had inside the front door.

“Sophie, no stealing Elle’s things,” Ben warned, earning a confused look from Tom. “She stole my mother’s bowl recently.”

“Your father gave it to me,” Sophie argued.

“Without telling mum.” Ben countered.

“I didn’t know that.” She pointed out.

“He’s hated the fucking thing for years, so first chance he had to get rid of it, and it ends up in our place.” Tom chuckled at his friend’s overdramatic reaction to a bowl. “So, where’s Danielle?”

“Kitchen,” Tom led the way.

“Ooh, what books does she have?” Sophie asked, glancing into Danielle’s living room on the way.

“Elle, frisk Sophie on the way out,” Ben called out in warning. “She plans on robbing half your home.”

“It’s actually so nicely done,” Sophie added, heading to the kitchen, looking around as she did.

“Actually, it appears she’s just robbing the whole fucking thing.” Sophie elbowed him slightly.

When there was no response, Tom frowned. “Elle?” he called going for the kitchen door. A sniffing noise caught their attention. “Mac, get away from the door.” There was another sniff and a grumbling noise before Tom opened it.

“Tom, he got in when I was throwing out bread crusts for the birds, but I am prepping food so I can’t touch him.” Elle apologised.

“Got it, come on, big man.” He grabbed a baked pig ear and caught the dog’s attention, allowing for Ben to open the door.

“He’s huge,” Ben commented. As soon as Mac Tíre realised there was someone new to sniff, the ear was forgotten about and he trotted over to the guests. “Soph, remember the pup I told you about.”

“You said he was a scrawny rat.”

“Well, he is getting a bit fatter these days, Diana is overfeeding him.”

“She is not, he’s supposed to be fatter than you have him.” Tom defended.

“I’m sorry, did your father have a vet practice?”

“My father was in charge of the company that sold your father pharmaceuticals.”

“Actually they manufactured them, not sold them, that is done by the parent company.” Danielle corrected, sticking out her tongue at him.

“So, yes, this is apparently my girlfriend, acting like a four-year-old.” Tom indicated to Danielle as he spoke to Sophie.

“He’s just annoyed I caught him on a technicality, I’m Danielle.” Danielle dismissed as she walked over to Sophie, cleaning her hand to shake hers. Sophie, however, walked forward and hugged her. “Oh, okay. I thought English were not supposed to be overly affectionate at the beginning.”

“I am half Scottish.” Sophie smiled.

“Ah, that explains it.” Danielle grinned back. “So, what’s this bout robbing my house?” she looked to Ben, who came to hug her as well.

“Sophie is an undiagnosed kleptomaniac apparently, and your house and everything in it is next.”

“Benedict!” Sophie looked at him appalled. “I just said I like your hall table and wondered what books you had on your shelves.” Sophie put her hands up as though she was being ordered to by authorities.

Danielle just laughed. “Thank you, it was my parents, I effectively took everything from the house with me here, so anything nice, it was probably theirs and as for the books, literally, you could find anything in there, there is no rhyme or reason to it, ask Tom, it annoys him.”

“It does not.” Tom dismissed, smiling like a fool at how immediately Elle had taken to Sophie.

“You glare at it, do not deny it, I can see it in your face.”

“I like your book organisational skills as much as you like my grey shoes.” He retorted.

“Ouch!” Danielle laughed in slight disbelief, “That is cold.”

“Those shoes are fucking tragic,” Benedict interjected, though his face was a jestful one. “I mean really, Tom.”

“Funny, he said you have two pairs.” Danielle joked.

“Ooh.” Tom pointed at Benedict as he laughed at his disbelieving look at the young woman. “That turned quickly.”

“Come for dinner and I get abused.” Ben shook his head, scratching Mac Tíre’s ear. “Why do I bother?”

“I think it is something to do with the food.” Elle joked, going back to the food. “Mac, out.”

“He is fine if you want to leave him in, so long as he won’t jump on Sophie.” Ben dismissed.

“Mac isn’t allowed jump on anyone or on the couch.” Tom showed him the ear again, regaining the dog’s attention. “Bed.” Taking the ear gently, Mac trotted to his bed. “Good boy.” He smiled, “Tea?”

“Please.” There was an eagerness to Sophie’s voice that was slightly dramatic.

“Very domestic,” Ben joked.

“Yeah,” Tom smiled as he looked at Danielle, who was busy prepping something for the dinner. “Oh, Elle is making…what is…is that your…”

“Good to see Eton and Cambridge paid off, proper coherent sentences there.” Ben joked.

“You may be laughing, but you have not had Elle’s Roast Lamb and veg.”

“Nice and exotic.” Elle shrugged.

“Does it come with potatoes?” Ben asked curiously.

“Gratin and roast.”

“I am never leaving.” Ben declared as Tom handed him a cup and thanked him, then watching as he handed one to Elle. “That’s not a cup, that’s a tankard.”

“You know Irish people drink more tea than us.” Tom pointed out.

“With cups that’s size, it’s hardly a fucking surprise.” Ben laughed. “Seriously, why would anyone need a cup that big?”

“Because they want that much tea.” Elle grinned, “Food’s on, so here or the living room?”

“If just to annoy Tom with your disorganised books, we’ll go to the living room, but no promises Sophie won’t rob you.” Ben joked, rushing through the door before his wife contemplated throwing her tea at him.

“So, how did the music shoot go?” Ben asked as he bit into another piece of the dinner.

“Fine, all things considered. Though I think I can put my hand on my heart and say it is chaotic and completely off-putting.” Danielle responded.

“The shoot or the person.”

“The shoot, the person I wasn’t overly bothered by, considering I am two and zero on that front, the song, however, as tragic as the ‘singing’ is once again, is not exactly very nice.” She looked to Tom apologetically.

“Yeah, I read about it, ‘The Heeler’, peculiar name,” Sophie added.

“Not really, makes perfect sense, it’s about Tom and myself and I was a paramedic.”

“But it is spelt wrong.” Ben pointed out.

“Wait, H-E-E-L-E-R is it?” Sophie nodded.

“Smart play on words there.” Danielle commended. “It’s clear she didn’t come up with this on her own.”

“How?” Tom asked.

“Does she seem like a professional wrestling fan to you? I mean; did she sit down and watch Summerslam when you two were…whatever you did together?” she asked.

“Summerslam?”

“That’s a no then. Professional wrestling, The Rock, Triple H, Stone Cold Steve Austin, John Cena, all those guys, the WWE, it’s a term they use. Their good guys are called ‘Baby Faces’, or ‘Faces’, and their baddies are given the term a ‘Heel’.” She explained.

“You literally will watch anything on the TV.” Tom shook his head.

Danielle shrugged, “I rather that that Keeping up with Whoever is in Vogue This Week and other reality toilet paper.”

“Definitely.” Sophie agreed, “I feel like I am alone in a sea of gossip fodder when people start waffling on about that.” she turned to her husband, who was eating more gratin, “You are going to regret that later in the week when you are running it off.”

“Don’t care, too good. Tom, how are you not going around another ten kilo’s heavier?”

“Because I don’t get it cooked for me often, Elle’s staying at the hotel and I was over stateside doing the voice work. It’s good, though, right?” Tom smiled knowingly at his friend, Ben nodded.

“I’m just glad you guys like it, I mean, it’s not Michelin star stuff.”

“Good, that stuff is shit, it’s the size of a two-pound coin, costs two hundred and tastes like rubber.” Ben scoffed. “You can’t beat the basics.”

“You can bring the boys to Hollywood.” Elle smiled as she drank some more wine mixed with a soft drink.

“Private school boys, if that counts.” Sophie chuckled.

“Says Ms Oxford.” Ben retorted.

“God, posh people,” Elle sniggered, causing Tom to chuckle and Sophie and Ben to stop bickering.

“So, you said this was your parents?” Sophie was getting ready to go upstairs after a pleasurable evening of talking.

“Yeah, my mum got it in some weird boutique place in the bog arse of nowhere back home.”

“Didn’t she mind you bringing it over here with you?”

“No, she and dad, they’re…gone.”

Sophie’s face filled with horror. “Oh, God, I’m so sorry, I didn’t…what…?”

“It’s fine, I mean it’s sort of commonplace, isn’t it?” Elle shrugged with a sad smile. “She had cancer, and dad just wasn’t the same after, his health went downhill fast, he was so stressed before and it was worse after for him, he was a workaholic so it was always her that made sure he ate and looked after himself, so with her gone and me in college…”

“You moved over after…”

“Yeah, didn’t want to stay there, dad was saying how there were more opportunities over here, and when I dropped out because I decided I rather do something different, I thought it was the better option to come here.”

“Why Suffolk though?”

“I’m not a city person, I prefer the quiet of the countryside, Suffolk was by chance, I found an opening here, decided it was the place for me, used the money from the sale of my parents place and my dad’s practise to get a nice house, which,” she looked around her. “I think I did pretty well with, and it just so happened that my neighbour was a nice woman who I spoke to the day I was viewing it and she convinced me to buy, saying it was a nice area, quiet and someday a great place to have my family and when I moved in, her kids came to help me, one of whom happened to be Tom.”

“That must have been a shock.” Sophie chuckled.

“It was, I mean, I like comic book movies, so I knew of Loki, but when Tom was in front of me, I hadn’t realised who he was, and was just looking at him with that funny suspicious look of ‘I know you from somewhere’.” Elle blushed as Sophie laughed.

“Oh God, really?”

“How he did not walk out of the place and have his mum file a restraining order, I don’t know.” She shook her head in shame.

“Ha-ha, sorry, but that’s hilarious, I love it.” Sophie laughed.

“How about you, Ben said you met on set years ago?”

“Yes, back when he was a bit of a nobody in the game too, a few bits here and there, but we had other people then, and by the time we started something, he was huge.”

“Yeah, I don’t know how you do it, the public stuff, and all they write about you and Christopher, and probably now this little bubble too.”

“You can’t let it get to you. Sometimes it’s jealousy, sometimes spite, others just want to bitch about anyone and others…I don’t know what their problem is, but they can just get over themselves, I love Ben, he loves me and Kit, and we live pretty normally off the red carpet, and as long as it stays like that, we are happy.”

“But you are accomplished too, you’re in his game, I am just a set person, I can only imagine what they will say if it gets out.”

“‘When’ not ‘if’,” Sophie corrected. “You will get some heat, after all, Tom and Ben are the ‘Internet’s Boyfriends’ but most will love that you are not a stick-thin, Hollywood Barbie, you are exactly what they all dream would happen, as cliché as it is, you are ‘The Girl Next Door’ literally.”

“God, that is fucking cliché.” Elle laughed.

“And it gives them a little hope too, that is something.”

“It is also going to add some heat.”

“Yes, I read what the papers wrote after the dinner with him and his mum.”

“You read a lot of gossip stuff?”

“Normally no, but after meeting Ms Swift, I wanted to see what they were saying about poor Tom and I saw the whole thing with you and him on a few papers.”

“Yeah, some were not very nice.” Elle played with her fingers.

“Tabloids never are, but the other’s will be the majority opinion, ‘wholesome’ is not a word used much in entertainment.”

“It sounds a lot like the word fat.”

“By some standards, yes, you are, you are supposed to be a size four to six, eat once every four days and snort more cocaine than you can handle to stave hunger pains, and you are not that, so they will hate you for it, because Tom clearly prefers you and that is not what their magazines tell them is sexy.”

“Thank you.” Elle gave a small smile. “I really wanted to talk to someone about this, but Tom doesn’t get it from this point of view, I mean, he understands, but doesn’t understand, if that makes sense?”

“He comprehends it, but does not feel it himself, so doesn’t have first-hand experience of it.” Sophie nodded. “I know that feeling.” There was a small hint of bitterness in her tone. “I thought for ages that no one could understand what it was like, especially when it was revealed we were engaged, even more so after it was announced I was pregnant.”

“Who helped you?”

“Amanda, Martin’s other half, she literally just came up to me one day, hugged me, threw the men out of the room and demanded I tell her exactly how I was feeling, and pushed and pushed until finally, I caved.”

“You never acted like it affected you.”

“In public, God no, but behind closed doors, I was terrified, and Ben had no idea how to help, Amanda saved us, I was so scared, I wanted to run and hide and never go in front of a camera again.”

“I’m glad you didn’t, you guys are amazing, and your son is the most gorgeous little cutie going.”

“When he wants to be, he can be temperamental.” Sophie smiled fondly.

“Hey, he’s male, it’s to be expected.” Elle dismissed, earning a loud laugh from Sophie.

#I Hate You I Love You #chapter 38 #tom hiddleston #tom hiddleston fic

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