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seijorhi · 3 years

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No Strings Attached

A commission for the lovely @hearteyes-candyskies, hope you like it bby! 💕

Bokuto Koutarou x female reader

TW Age gap, power imbalance, manipulation, toxic behaviour, nsfw(ish)

Three months ago, you would have laughed at the very idea of having a sugar daddy.

Then again, three months ago you were still living with your boyfriend and had a steady paycheck coming in every week. You can blame losing the latter on bad luck and an asshole boss, but the former-

You knew your relationship with your ex was far from perfect, but coming home from losing said job to find him buried balls deep in your next door neighbour was a bit of a slap in the face.

Needless to say, in the space of a few days you were out a job, a boyfriend and an apartment. Which, somewhat inevitably, led to you being six wines deep, slumped over your best friend’s bed, sobbing over the wreckage of the life you’d built, suddenly ripped out from beneath you.

You can’t really remember whose idea it was, only giggling drunkenly between yourselves as Misuzu set up your ‘sugar baby’ profile. “Shh, no this is gonna be great,” she’d said, hitting at the hands that tried to grab back your phone. “Meet some hot rich old dude, ride a little dick, let him shower you in cash; all your problems? Poof, sorted!”

And even with the heady, rose tinted haze of your wine fuelled inebriation, you knew that it was just a joke, a bit of stupid fun born more out of an attempt to cheer you up than a viable plan to get the tattered remains of your life back on track. Calling some old creepy dude ‘daddy’ and pretending to love him (not to mention the whole letting him fuck you thing) just for a little money wasn’t exactly your idea of a good time.

Plus, you were fairly sure that you weren’t what most people had in mind when they thought ‘sugar baby’. It wasn’t ever meant to be anything serious, just dumb, drunken fun with your friend.

So when you woke the next day a little after mid morning with a head full of regrets and a pounding headache, the last thing you expected was to find a message from BigDaddyKou82 waiting for you, better sense told you to ignore it.

Honestly, you didn’t really want a sugar daddy, your love life was enough of a mess without throwing in a power imbalance like that.

You should have ignored the message, deleted it or shot him a quick reply politely explaining that you weren’t interested so you could put it out of your mind, and you would have-

If Misuzu hadn’t caught sight of the message first, snatching the phone out of your hand with a gleeful shriek.

—

If you’ve learned anything in these past months, it’s that Bokuto Koutarou doesn’t do anything by half measures. So when he tells you he’s booked dinner for the two of you at an upscale restaurant in the city, you should have expected the package that’s hand delivered right to the door of your shitty little apartment. The dress is beautiful, expensive - though you could tell that just from the elegant matte black box wrapped in golden ribbon it arrives in. It’s exactly his style; short, revealing and just dancing along the edge of impropriety, not that that’ll bother him in the slightest.

But it is gorgeous, and loathe as you are to admit it, it flatters you well.

It’s not the first time that he’s bought you clothes, your tiny closet’s almost overflowing with pieces he’s gifted you. He likes seeing you in the things he’s bought, sometimes a little too much, you think. But you’ve learned it’s better just to go along with it - he gets this wide eyed, beaming grin whenever he sees you dressed in the pretty things he’s bought you, and the sight of it never fails to make your cheeks heat, warmth curling in your stomach.

The dress was not unexpected. The soft, lacy lingerie that comes in the accompanying box, on the other hand - that was new.

And of course, you barely have time to unwrap your gift when your phone flashes to life, an incoming call from the man himself.

“D’ya like it?”

The giddy excitement in his voice is unmistakable, and if you close your eyes you can picture the look on his face - golden eyes all hooded and hungry, that glittering, eager grin he wears when the two of you are out in public but his mind’s occupied with all the filthy, wonderful things he wants to do to you the moment you’re alone.

Not that he’s ever that patient.

“Um, it’s…” Fingers tentatively reach into the tissue paper, pulling the sheer, lacy bra out, warmth blossoming in your cheeks. The matching panties - a tiny scrap of lace held together with bows and thin black straps - really aren’t much better. Like the dress, the lingerie is clearly well made, probably cost more than your weekly rent, and the delicate set is arguably gorgeous (you can’t even argue his taste), but–

“You’re gonna wear it for me tonight, right, baby?”

It’s not really a question; of course you will, because you always do. You would have thought by now that you’d be used to the gifts he showers you in.

“Yeah, but Kou, you really didn’t have to spend all this money on me. Dinner’s enough,” you tell him, setting the lingerie back down.

Dinner, and everything else for that matter.

A chuckle echoes down the line. “But I like spoiling my girl. Like buying you pretty things,” his voice dips, “like tearing ‘em off you afterwards, too.”

And despite all the apprehension curled up inside of you, a shiver of excitement runs down your spine.

—

“So…” Misuzu pushes, leaning across the countertop with her chin resting on her palm and looking entirely too pleased at your discomfort.

“He… asked me to meet him.”

Her eyes widen, sparkling in delight as she gasps, “For dinner?”

“For a drink - one drink,” you clarify. You elect not to tell her that he’d initially tried to sway you into dinner, and it was you who’d talked him down to a drink. Truthfully, you’d probably feel more comfortable getting coffee, but meeting at a bar was fine.

One drink, and if things got awkward or he turned out to be a creep you’d be out of there in a heartbeat.

“Oh my god!! My baby Y/N, all grown up and manipulating old, lonely men for money. I’m so proud,” she wipes a fake tear from her eye and bursts into a fit of giggles.

A crinkle appears between your brow as you frown at her, “He’s not even that old,” you grumble, “and it’s not like that. You know it’s not.”

“No?” she asks, her lips curling into a teasing smirk. “You know, for somebody who was so against me messaging your soon to be sugar daddy, you sure move quickly.”

She laughs at the glare you shoot her way. “You were the one who started this.”

“Mhm, and you were the one who didn’t stop it. Funny that, don’t you think?”

She looks like the cat that ate the canary; smug, glittering amusement written all across her face. And you hate, more than anything, that she’s right.

Because you’d meant to put a stop to it the moment you managed to wrestle your phone back from her. Afterwards, you’d blame the lingering hurt of having your heart broken, the insecurities and bitter humiliation that plagued you, the feeling that you weren’t good enough to stop your boyfriend from straying for making you so pathetically vulnerable and desperate for approval - but when you opened the chat instead of the sleazy come on’s you expected, his first message makes something inside of you flutter, warm and pleasant.

Holy crap, you’re beautiful.

Not exactly a sonnet from Shakespeare, but you can’t remember the last time any guy, much less your ex, called you beautiful.

It didn’t exactly hurt that instead of the aging, creepy looking letch you were half expecting, the profile picture showed a rather fit, attractive man in a crisp, black suit with silvery grey streaked hair and an easy grin. Of course, it was a fifty-fifty chance that the pic wasn’t even him, or if it was then it was outdated or heavily edited, but it was enough to make you pause.

Enough to make you… curious, if nothing else.

But ridiculously attractive or not, you weren’t going to lead him on. If he wanted some pretty, simpering thing to fuck and throw money at, to call him daddy and be his sweet, obedient little girl - that wasn’t you. You’d explained that you weren’t really sure if this was your thing, that you probably weren’t what he had in mind, but surprisingly he hadn’t been put off by that.

Well what’s the harm in finding out for yourself? Maybe you’ll like it more than you think ;)

—

There were rules, when you started - lines you both agreed wouldn’t be crossed.

First and foremost, while it wasn’t exactly a conventional relationship - at least, not the kind you were used to - it was still a relationship of sorts, and there was an expectation of honesty in lieu of absolute exclusivity. You’d tell him if you were seeing anybody else, and Bokuto would tell you the same. Considering sex was on the table, it made sense.

You swore right from the beginning that you wouldn’t allow yourself to become financially dependent on him - you knew all too well that relationships were fickle things to begin with. That kind of dependency was half the reason you were in this position in the first place, and you wouldn’t - couldn’t - let that happen again. That didn’t mean that the arrangement wasn’t transactional. After a few initial meetings that went better than you expected, the two of you came to an agreement; a nice little sum of money he’d deposit weekly in your account in exchange for you being there when he wanted you. Dinner dates, skype calls when he’s travelling, spur of the moment weekends away in expensive hotels - whatever he wanted... within reason.

The thing is, despite his flaws - the little funks he gets into, his immaturity despite the age gap between you, the way he clings to you, mopes if you don’t pay him the attention he wants - you genuinely like Bo, he’s oddly endearing. Loveable, even. He reminds you a little of a puppy; eager for affection, bright and boisterous with boundless energy (and enviable stamina). He’s sweet and adoring and funny and he has this uncanny ability to make everything else fade away when you’re with him, to make you feel like you’re the only woman in the room, beautiful and perfect and entirely his-

But that didn’t make him your boyfriend.

You weren’t lovers, and whether it was in two weeks or two years, you both knew this arrangement had an expiration date. And because of that, there were no strings attached. At any point, either one of you could end it without an explanation - no questions asked, no feelings hurt.

—

Truthfully, you don’t know an awful lot about Bokuto’s line of work, only that his position within the company is senior enough that he can move around his schedule pretty much as he wants, leaving him free to see you whenever he likes.

Which wasn’t a problem when that was once or twice a week.

“Sorry, Koutarou, you know I can’t. Maybe tomorrow?”

The petulant whine that echoes down the phone fills you with an odd sort of guilt. “Why not? You said no on Friday, too,” he pouts. “I miss you, baby. Wanna see you again.”

You shove down the faint, flickering unease that nudges at your gut. You’re not his girlfriend, and you find yourself wondering whether or not he sometimes deliberately lets himself forget that.

Nibbling at your bottom lip, you frown, “I told you I have work today. It’s too late for me to try and find someone to cover my shift, and if I call in again-”

You can kiss your job goodbye. You’re already on thin ice with your boss, and it’s not like new waitresses are hard to find these days.

“Well… what time do you finish?” he asks, his voice thick with dejection, as if he already knows what your answer’s going to be.

You bite back a sigh, “Late. I’m on close again.”

The short silence on the other end of the phone is deafening. “… I’ll come pick you up afterwards.”

This time you can’t stop the soft sigh that escapes, “Kou, I’m gonna be exhausted, I won’t be any fun to be around.”

“Still wanna see you. You’re always working,” he grumbles. “Feels like you don’t have time for me anymore, baby.”

Slowly your eyes flutter shut, and you take a deep breath. It always comes back to this. “I need this job, baby. We’ve talked about this… I’ll see you tomorrow, okay? I have the whole day off, I’m entirely yours.”

“All mine, hm?”

You smile, “All yours, promise.”

He hums in acknowledgement, not entirely happy, but temporarily placated. “Fiiiine. But I’m holding you to it.”

As if you expected any less. “I have to go get ready for work. I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”

“I’ll see you later,” he promises, and you hang up a moment later.

When he said that, you assumed that both of you were on the same page as to what ‘later’ meant.

Three hours into your shift, you hadn’t expected to return from the kitchen to find a grinning Bokuto lounging in one of your booths.

“He asked for you specifically when he came in,” one of your coworkers tells you, shooting you a playful wink. “Didn’t know you were into silver foxes, Y/N. But I can’t say I blame you, he’s hot!”

“Yeah, thanks,” you mutter distractedly, glancing over your shoulder to check your manager wasn’t watching before making your way over.

The smile on your face is tight as golden eyes flicker towards you. “Bokuto,” you begin quietly, “what- what are you doing here?”

An odd look passes across his face at the use of his family name, but the smug grin remains. “You said you had to work tonight,” he says with a cavalier shrug, as if that explained everything.

“Yes, because I’m working! Kou, I need this job, I can’t-” you break off with a huff, darting another glance over your shoulder. Thankfully, your manager’s busy berating your co-worker for a screwed up order and hasn’t noticed your absence yet.

Taking advantage of your distracted state, Bokuto reaches across the table to take your hand in his, his thumb stroking back and forth along the back of your palm. “Hey, hey, relax. You’re here to work, I get it, baby. I’m just here for some food, cross my heart,” he swears, drawing an imaginary X over his chest with his finger.

Gently tugging your hand back, you ignore the hurt little pout he gives you. “So you decided to drive twenty minutes across town just to eat here?” you ask, trying to keep the exasperation from colouring your tone.

He shifts a little in his seat, cheeks flushing a dusty pink under your narrowed stare. “… Well, maybe I wanted to see my pretty girl, too,” he admits, “But I swear I’ll be on my best behaviour!”

Somehow, his words don’t fill you with confidence, but what are you supposed to do? Kick him out? Snap at him for coming despite the fact you told him not to? Taking a deep, steadying breath through your nose, you force yourself to relax. Bokuto’s not hurting anybody by being there, and so long as he keeps his hands to himself, so long as he behaves, it won’t be an issue.

He’s a paying customer, and you’ll treat him just like you would anyone else who walked through the restaurant’s doors.

Yet despite trying to reassure yourself of that, you can’t escape the niggling sense of unease sitting in the pit of your stomach. Even if he’s the perfect gentleman tonight, the perfect stranger, you’ve worked hard to keep your boring day to day life and the one you’ve created with him in nice, neat, separate boxes. Bokuto hasn’t met your friends or your family and outside of Misuzu they don’t have a clue about your arrangement with your attractive if somewhat clingy benefactor.

You don’t want them to know.

Him being here threatens that - it makes you nervous.

But you’ve been with Bokuto long enough to know that you can’t tell him that without hurting his feelings, and you definitely don’t have the energy to deal with that tonight. It’s a conversation for another day.

Instead, you allow a small smile to tug at the corners of your lips, “You know the food’s pretty average here, you might be disappointed.”

Bokuto grins again, mischief sparkling in those golden eyes, and your traitorous heart skips a beat. “Yeah, don’t think that’ll be a problem,” he leans in closer, “I’m far more interested in what’s for dessert.”

Warmth floods your cheeks as he snickers.

—

For the most part he keeps his hands to himself, but you can’t quite bring yourself to relax when you can feel those golden, hungry eyes burning a hole into your back as you move around the restaurant serving other customers.

You pretend you don’t see the scowling glower he sends to the harmless office-worker who spends a good forty five minutes flirting with you every time you go over to check on his table.

Bokuto orders enough food to feed a small army and stays until close, leaving a more than generous tip on his way out.

It goes without saying that he waits for you to finish up. The moment you slip out the door, calling out one last goodnight to your coworker, he’s on you, pushing you up against the brick alleyway wall, hiking your legs up over his hips as his mouth attacks yours, greedy and eager, swallowing up any and all protests you might’ve had.

He doesn’t take you home like you ask, but back to his penthouse suite, and neither of you get much sleep that night.

—

You’re halfway through washing your hair a few days later when your shower head splutters once… twice… and stops completely.

A blockage in the plumbing, your landlord informs you rather apathetically. It’s affecting the whole floor and it’ll take at least a day or two to get somebody out to fix it properly, leaving you without running water for the entirety of that time.

In hindsight, there were at least three other people you could have (and probably should have) called first, but he’s already answering the phone before the thought even occurs to you.

And then it’s too late to backpedal. You find yourself grateful that he can’t physically see the way you flush and fidget, pacing around your living room as you awkwardly try to explain the reason you’re calling at ten in the morning.

“Would, I mean, i-is it okay if I come over to use your shower? Just for this one time, mine kind of got interrupted this morning.”

God, from the way you stutter, stumbling over your own tongue, you’d think you were asking him to marry you. You’ve spent the night at his countless times before, but asking for a favour, even a small one like this - maybe you’re toeing an unwritten line in the sand? Bokuto isn’t with you because he loves you, he’s with you because it’s mutually beneficial for both of you, because of an agreement.

He wants fun, easy, not you saddling him with minor inconveniences. Calling to ask him to come save you, albeit from something as mundane as a lack of access to a functioning shower, feels like something you’d ask your boyfriend to do.

Not your sugar daddy.

But just as you’re about to backtrack and apologise for interrupting his morning, he speaks. “What d’you mean? Just come stay with me till it’s fixed.”

He says it with such certainty, as if it’s the most obvious solution and for a moment you’re stunned into silence. “A-are you sure? I don’t want-'' Don't want what? To be an inconvenience? A problem? “I don’t want to be in the way,” you finish lamely.

Bokuto just laughs, “Don’t be stupid, baby, of course you won’t be in the way. Just swing by the office and I can give you the keys. Or I can just get you another set made? I don’t know, we can figure it out later. I’ll see you soon, ‘kay?”

And you have to admit, as apprehensive as you were stepping into his penthouse alone for the first time, showering in Bokuto’s fancy ensuite bathroom (which you’re fairly sure is bigger than your actual bedroom) is a hell of a lot nicer than doing it at home. The lotions he has are all expensive brands with french names you’ve never even heard of before, but they smell amazing and they leave your skin feeling all soft and silky. Even the shampoo he’s bought for you to use is far nicer than the one you have at home, though you’re secretly pleased that its scent’s similar - your favourite, actually.

Did he buy them knowing that or was it just a coincidence, you wonder. You never thought to ask.

Without work, or Bo for that matter, to occupy your time, you decide to take advantage of his gigantic TV, opening up Netflix and settling into his ridiculously comfortable couch…

… And wake, a few hours later to the feeling of fingers carding through your hair and a pair of lips pressing against your cheek.

Bokuto’s home, you realise with a start, and there’s drool on your chin. Face burning with embarrassment, you hastily wipe it away with the back of your palm and try to sit up, only for Bokuto’s hand to wrap around your wrist, halting you in your tracks.

“No, don’t get up, baby,” he says, easing down onto the couch beside you and shifting your head onto his lap so he can continue threading his fingers through your hair. “I like coming home to this.”

Still half asleep, curling up and nuzzling further into those warm, thick thighs of his, you miss the intensity of the adoration burning in golden depths as he coaxes you back to sleep.

—

The two of you are in bed, your cheek resting on his chest, his arm slung over your waist and knuckles brushing idly along your side, when Bokuto breaks the comfortable silence.

“Move in with me.”

You tense in his arms, heart skipping a beat. For a split second, you’re almost positive that you misheard him. “I-I’m sorry?” You push yourself up onto your elbow, turning your head so that you can look at him properly.

But Bokuto doesn’t miss a beat. “Move in with me,” he repeats, golden eyes bearing down on you.

The expression on your face is frozen halfway between disbelief and hysteria, and you’re staring at him, waiting for that stupid grin to break across his face, for him to laugh and tell you how ridiculous you look, because of course he’s joking.

He’s joking, right?

“Koutarou,” you begin slowly, “Wha- I don’t… Why would you want me to move in with you? We barely- I mean, we’re not…”

He shrugs his shoulders, “Why wouldn’t I? It makes sense. My place is bigger and nicer, and I like having you here with me. Feels right.”

It feels right??

“I-I can’t just move out of my apartment, Kou.”

His eyebrows knit together, and he huffs, “Why not? It’s a shitty apartment.”

“That’s not the point!” Knocking away the hand that reaches for you, you push yourself all the way up until you’re sitting properly. “I don’t want to move.”

Owlish eyes narrow, a flash of irritation sparking. “Why not? It makes perfect sense for you to move in here with me. You wouldn’t have to work at that stupid job anymore for one,” he huffs.

“Bokuto, I’m not going to quit my job,” you mutter. “We’ve talked about this.”

“Why, though?!” he explodes. “You don’t need the money, I’ve told you I can take care of you, whatever you want, baby, name it and it’s fucking yours. You don’t need to work and you don’t need that shitty little apartment!”

Like a crystal glass slipping from numb fingers, the fantasy you’ve convinced yourself you’ve been living shatters into a thousand jagged shards in the space of a single breath.

Oh, how naive you’ve been. How fucking stupid.

Squeezing your eyes shut, you inhale deeply, “Kou, that’s not-”

Strong fingers grip your jaw, and your eyes shoot open as he tugs your face back towards him. Your breath catches in your throat, heart hammering painfully against your ribs. His eyes are wide, pupils blown out, but it’s the intensity in his gaze as he stares at you, the blank expression-

“I love you.”

—

39 missed calls. 72 unread messages.

Flowers, bouquets of roses, peonies and chrysanthemums piled up by your door between boxes of chocolates and other gifts you won’t bring yourself to open.

Wide eyed, Misuzu gingerly steps over them, holding two steaming mugs in hand. “Holy fuck,” she murmurs, and for the first time since this stupid, awful mistake began, there’s not a trace of mirth to be found. “Y/N, I…”

But she doesn’t have the words, and you can’t blame her.

“He told me he loves me,” you sigh. “He asked me to move in with him and told me he loved me, and I grabbed my clothes and all but ran.” You still can’t get the image of Bokuto’s face out of your head, the raw, aching hurt swimming in his eyes as you all but stumbled over excuses in your haste to get out of there. But he didn’t lift a finger to stop you, didn’t say another word.

He just watched numbly, hunched over against the headboard as you fled.

There’s a short beat of silence between the two of you as she sets down the drinks and collapses into the chair beside you. “And… do you love him back?”

Exhaling loudly, you drop your face into your palms. “I-”

You like how he makes you feel beautiful, the filthy, wonderful praise he lavishes you in when the two of you sleep together, the way he touches you, fingers and mouth so eager to please as his cock fills you, inch by delicious inch.

You like being adored, treasured, and you liked Bo, but… you don’t love him.

That was never on the cards, that wasn’t what your relationship was.

Every line he ever crossed, every boundary he toed, you keep replaying them again and again over and over in your head like a never ending loop. You hadn’t even wanted this whole stupid sugar baby relationship to begin with, and every step of the way he was the one to coax you forward.

And you let him, swallowing down your doubts and your insecurities each and every time. You let him think that this was something else entirely…

How had you not seen this coming?

“No,” you admit.

The hand that takes yours is soft, and when you glance over with eyes beginning to burn with unshed tears, Misuzu squeezes it gently. “Then end it. Walk away.”

And with your head on her shoulder, her arms wrapped loosely around you, you type out a short message to Bokuto. No strings attached and no questions asked, you’d promised each other that much when you’d started this mess. You wonder if it still holds true.

I’m sorry. Clearly we were on different pages and want different things. I didn’t mean to lead you on or for things to go as far as they did, but I can’t do this with you anymore.

You send it and block his contact, and when the tears come and painful sobs rip their way free, Misuzu holds you tight and murmurs soft reassurances. It’ll pass, all breakups hurt.

—

A week after your ‘breakup’ you get a notification on your phone that money’s been transferred into your bank account.

For a moment, you think that maybe it’s an accident, a recurring transaction he’d simply forgotten to cancel (you doubt he’d even notice) until you click into the transaction itself.

It isn’t the sum itself that startles you - twice the usual amount - but the short note attached in the description.

I need to see you. Please.

You transfer the money right back into his account.

—

Without your weekly supplement from Bo, it doesn’t take long for you to come to the realisation that your current salary just barely covers rent and your bills, and if you want to eat anything other than two minute noodles in the foreseeable future, you’re going to need either more hours, or a second job.

Thankfully, the timing works out well. When you go to your boss with your most winning smile to try and convince her of your plight, she simply shrugs and agrees, having had to let one of the junior staff go only a few days before. The one catch being that instead of working a mix of morning and afternoon shifts with the occasional closing thrown in, you’re now exclusively on close, five nights a week, Tuesday through Saturday.

Mostly, it doesn’t bother you. The shifts are long and you always leave feeling aching, drained and barely human, but usually it’s quiet enough, and so long as you can get the last few lingering customers out early enough, the actual close runs pretty smoothly between you and the other staff.

It’s not what you really want to be doing, but you’ve learned to make the best of it. This is adult life, and for the first time since high school, you’re supporting yourself entirely. It might not be the greatest job in the world, and there are absolutely days when you just want to throw in the towel completely, but there is a slight pride to that fact. You don’t need anybody in your life to coddle or support you, you’re figuring this shit out as you go along.

You just wish, sometimes, that you could do that without having to work until the early hours of the morning.

On paper, the kitchen closes at midnight and the last customers are supposed to be out within half an hour of that. Then, between yourself and another server, you can usually get the restaurant tidied up and closed a little after one.

You knew right from the moment you clocked on that tonight wasn’t going to be one of those nights. The girl who’s supposed to be on close with you called in sick and your boss hasn’t bothered to replace her.

It’s not the first time you’ve had to close by yourself, but it’s still a pain, especially when the last few customers take forever to finish up and leave.

One of the kitchen staff offers to stay back, his bag slung over his shoulder, hand already on the door handle but you just shake your head with a tired smile.

“Nah, I can handle it. Thanks, though,”

To his credit, he doesn’t immediately take the offered out. “Are you sure?”

“Yeah, I’ll be fine. See you tomorrow.”

Without any help, it takes almost twice as long for you to finish up, and it’s a little after two when you finally flick off the lights and lock the doors.

Your feet are killing you, and all you can think about is sinking into your bed at home, burrowing into your blankets and sleeping for a week straight-

“Hey, baby.”

Leaning against the hood of his car, arms folded across his broad chest and eyeing you with an unreadable expression, is Bokuto.

The tiny hairs on the back of your neck stand on end.

There's nothing inherently threatening about him being here, but it’s the middle of the night, you haven’t seen him in almost two weeks and you don’t need to glance around to know that the car park’s empty. There’s nobody in sight.

Just you and him, and the few feet of distance separating you.

“K-kou, what are you… what are you doing here?”

He smiles at that, the way his name slips from your lips, but only for a fleeting second. It fades, and a cold, uncomfortable feeling settles in the pit of your stomach.

“I missed you, y’know?” He pushes off the hood and takes a step towards you, “You didn’t call me.”

He’s always been bigger than you, towering over you looking like some Adonis with those rippling, powerful muscles of his. You used to like that strength, squealing in wicked delight when he’d hoist you up with a grin, hands gripping your thighs, squeezing your ass, your back shoved up against the wall so he could drive his cock deeper into ‘his pretty fuckin’ pussy’.

But that was then.

You’ve never been scared of his strength. Even that morning in the apartment, he didn’t lash out, didn’t scream or yell, he just… shut down. He wouldn’t hurt you, you know that.

That doesn’t stop you from skittering backwards like a frightened little bunny, your back hitting the wall.

The very moment you do, you watch as his eyes widen in surprise, hurt flashing for a split second-

-before they darken, his face twisting into a scowl, and you can’t escape the feeling you’ve made an awful mistake.

Dread creeps its way up your spine, tightening like a vice around your chest, making it hard to breathe. Your brain is screaming at you to run, adrenaline surging through your veins, but even as your heart races and your breathing spikes, you can’t seem to move your legs.

It wouldn’t make a difference even if you could - with your back up against the literal wall, Bokuto and his car blocking your only escape route, you’re trapped; a fact that hasn’t escaped either of you.

Paralysed in fear, you can’t so much as twitch as he takes another slow, calculated step forward.

Desperately, you open your mouth - to try and placate him? To apologise? Scream for help? - but all that escapes is his name in a choked, breathless whisper.

“Bokuto…”

As he stares at you, he almost looks regretful.

Almost, if not for the grim determination resolving like steel in those golden eyes of his. “I love you, and I know you love me, too,” he says, closing the gap between you. “I’m doing this for us, baby.”

#yandere haikyuu #yandere bokuto x reader #yandere bokuto kotaro x reader #yandere bokuto koutarou #yandere bokuto kotaro #yandere bokuto koutarou x reader #tw manipulation #tw toxic behavior #tw kidnapping

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nctyhoney · 3 years

Text

a helping hand (m)

Pairing: mark lee x fem!reader

Genre: smut, fluff, office worker!mark, friends to lovers, office!au

Word Count: 7.6k

Warnings: oral sex (male receiving), car sex, dry humping, praise kink

Playlist: pickled ginger - mac ayres, fill my holes - YESEO, wait for it - H.E.R.

Summary: You were used to workplace flirting. Everyone at some point would have a 'work bae'. Mark was different though, he was your intern. There were things you wanted to teach him, things he wanted to teach you and none of it had anything to do with work.

A/N: Mark in a suit is just too damn cute. This is my first fic on here so thank you for reading! There will be another part to this at some point.

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It’s just gone 8 am and you're on your morning commute to work. You have a car but the traffic in Seoul made it almost impossible to drive during rush hour. Your eyes still feel puffy from sleep, and you hope your mascara has masked their appearance somewhat. As you and a mass of other office workers spill out of the subway station, you're greeted by an autumnal wind. Although it felt mild for the time of year, you couldn't get used to the early morning darkness that the promise of winter brought.

In just 2 years, you'd progressed to head of the marketing team at Hyphen, Korea's biggest publishing house. You were proud to have landed a job at such a reputable company straight out of university, but with each pay rise came more responsibilities.

The elevator reached your floor, 39. Going through to the kitchen area, you put two iced Americano cans in the refrigerator. You weren't a fan of coffee but it got you through the day. As you were organising the refrigerator, you felt someone behind you and turned around quickly - it was your manager. He had a weird way of creeping up on his workers and you found him somewhat seedy. You always made sure to be polite to him, though.

"Morning manager Kim," you stand up, adjusting your pencil skirt slightly.

"Morning y/n! Here bright and early I see. Did you get my email last night?" He asks, his eyes flicking between your body and your face.

"Sorry, what email?" You ask, feeling slightly panicked.

"This year's interns start today. I sent it last night so you probably didn't get a chance to read it."

Crap. Interns. You didn't know if it was your imposter syndrome talking but something about being observed by interns made you feel underqualified. Perhaps you just got a bad batch of interns the first time around. You remembered Kyungsoo and Minhee from last year. Kyungsoo's uncle was CEO of Hyphen and he wouldn't let you forget it. He refused to work and you'd find him and Minhee coming back from their lunch breaks an hour late, often out of the unused stock cupboard.

"No sorry I didn't read it," you apologise, "when are they coming?"

"The receptionist said there are four downstairs waiting. They'll be up in a minute," manager Kim says checking his watch.

You nod, "How many will I be working with this year?"

"You'll each have one intern this year. You'll be working with Mark Lee, he's Canadian. A good kid. I think you'll like him."

Just then, the sound of the elevator reaching the 39th floor alerted you. Four of the interns shuffled out of the elevator.

"Welcome to Hyphen, I'm manager Kim, you might remember me from your interview," he said looking between his sheet with their faces and names and up at them.

"So we have Mark, Haechan, Jeno and Sooji. I hope you enjoy this year working in marketing. This is y/n, she's head of this department."

You exchange handshakes and bobs of the head, feeling relieved that these interns at least look shy rather than cocky rich kids.

"Mark you'll be giving y/n a helping hand this year. Y/n, I know you'll make him feel welcome. The rest of you, let's find the workers you'll be shadowing," manager Kim says before they're off out of the kitchen to one of the conference rooms.

Mark is staring at you from a distance, awkward and tense. His black hair falls into his eyes despite styling it neatly for work; he brushes it out of his eye nervously.

"Tea?" you ask him, grabbing your two favourite mugs out of the cupboard.

"Oh, yeah, please - if that's not too much trouble," Mark says hesitantly.

"Of course it's not. You can sit down, we don't start work for another 20 minutes."

He does as he's told, opting for one of the chairs closest to the kitchen worktop.

"Do you take sugar?" You call over to him.

"Two," he replies, fiddling slightly with his wristwatch. This boy is endearing you think, definitely an upgrade from arrogant Kyungsoo.

"How are you feeling about interning here?" You ask, stirring his tea, before coming to sit at the chair next to his.

He takes the mug, "Oh, thank you. I'm kinda nervous I'm not gonna lie, but thankful to be here."

You laugh, his casual tone is refreshing but he catches on and apologizes quickly.

"There's no need to apologize, you can be informal with me. I don't want you to feel uncomfortable," you say, catching his eye over the rim of your mug. He's blushing slightly, and you wonder why you are too.

♡

It's been 3 months since the interns came. December comes and with it is an endless rain.

In those 3 months, it didn't take long for you and Mark to grow close. Sure, he still had his occasional shy tendencies but you spent all your working hours together. Rather than a forced relationship between a senior and their junior, this was something you both saw as natural.

You're just not sure if the feelings you've developed are natural, too. His eyes hold onto yours for longer at company dinners, his hands linger at your waist when he reaches to get a file from the shelf in front of you. And it sets something off in you. You crave the contact. Mark Lee is driving you crazy.

You certainly weren't imagining these moments. You were used to workplace flirting. Everyone at some point would have a 'work bae'. Mark was different though, he was your intern. There were things you wanted to teach him, things he wanted to teach you and none of it had anything to do with work.

When you first started at Hyphen, Johnny used to be heavy on the flirting with you, and being from America, he was confident with it. He’d make you cups of hot, sweet tea each morning. He gave you those flirtatious touches on your arms while complimenting you, and he’d always make sure you got home safe after a company dinner. But he also had a long-term girlfriend and you knew nothing could come of it. Johnny still flirts with you, but that’s just him. And when you first began working at the company, you fell for it...almost. It happened a second time, with Jaehyun but then you learnt that these were just the ways of the office.

Today was a Friday, which meant your division would have drinks with the manager. You weren't keen on drinking, especially not with your manager but your coworkers made it bearable. And since the CEO was attending this week, the manager wouldn't be bothering you, Yerin and Mina for the entire night.

You lean over Mark, reading through the document on his laptop. He's edited the press release you wrote for a new book launch.

He shifts around in his seat. You can't tell if he's nervous about you reading his work or nervous about being sat underneath you. You hope it’s the latter option, though.

"As expected from our Markie. You're really helping me by editing these documents, it's great - thanks," you smile, moving away slightly.

He's blushing a violent shade of pink and touching the back of his neck. He couldn't get any cuter.

"It's not fair that y/n gets such a helpful intern. Sooji left early when she promised to help with my reports, that's the second time this week," Mina huffs, folding her arms.

"It's compensation for the hell I went through with the interns last year," you laugh.

Johnny walks up to you and nudges you playfully.

"Nah it's not compensation. Y/n is just so hard-working, that's why they gave you the most hard-working intern," he says winking.

Mark looks between you and Johnny, an eyebrow raised.

"Yeah, thanks for that Johnny but that's definitely not true. Not the part about Mark not being hard-working...or me, I mean, I am hard-working, just not the most," you stutter, suddenly feeling foolish.

Luckily it hits 5 pm before anyone can dwell on your tongue-tied speech. You're all tidying away, turning off your monitors and getting ready for a night of drinking.

You catch eyes with Yerin and go to the bathroom to touch up your makeup.

You're reapplying a dab of lipstick and Yerin brushes her face lightly with powder. She stops for a moment, glancing at you.

"You don't still like Johnny do you?" Yerin asks.

"Johnny?! No way, I'm not going back there," you laugh.

"You seem nervous around him," Yerin points out.

"Come on Yerin, that was awkward. It's weird when someone hypes you up like that. It's bad enough being marketing lead now, it's like I'm expected to be some bigshot when I still feel like a uni student," you admit.

"Yeah, I understand, but you're totally capable. Could it be that you’re feeling shy around a handsome, new worker, I wonder?" Yerin winks.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I've noticed that you've been spending a lot of time with Mark recently. I'm left to take lunch with Doyoung. I mean I'm not complaining but you know, Mark does look kinda smitten."

You look over at your friend and catch her looking back at you, expectantly.

"We have to look after our interns, Yerin. And it's not every day that you get such a hard-working one like Mark. Remember the hell I went through with Kyungsoo? Let's just say I'm relieved I've got a good worker."

"Right...so you don't think he's even a little bit cute?"

Hell yes, you did. But you couldn't admit that, could you?

"He's cute but like, in a little bro way. He's too goofy for me to see him romantically," you bluff but you know Yerin can see right through you.

"He's an intern, what's the harm? As long as Kim doesn't find out," Yerin says.

"Yerin! You're talking nonsense."

"I've seen the way you look at him. And the way he looks at you," she laughs.

"The way he looks at me?" You blurt out, "The way I look at him? We're just good coworkers."

"Girl, you're such a bad liar."

♡

Yerin's words stay in your head for the entire night. Suddenly you're thinking about what Mark's lips would feel like against yours. Wondering what it would feel like for him to touch you, more than the light touches in the office. You've thought about it before, of course. But mostly while touching yourself in bed.

Mark is sat at the low table opposite you, Yerin and Mina at either side of you. Mark is laughing, taking a shot of soju as Johnny pats him on the back. He clearly can't handle his alcohol because he's giggling like a school kid and his face is already flushed. He looks stupidly cute and you realize how much you want to hold him, feel his flushed cheeks underneath your palms. But you peel your eyes away, tuning in to a conversation Yuta and Mina are having about Christmas holidays in Japan.

Manager Kim announces that him and the CEO will be moving to drink somewhere else, stumbling from the long table and telling you to enjoy your night. You all know where that 'somewhere else' is, but you don't bother questioning it. Corporate culture can be parasitic.

Even so, you're relieved that they've left, the atmosphere less stuffy now. Things feel playful and flirtatious. Jaemin is whispering in Jeno's ear and Jeno is laughing. Yerin's hand is dangerously placed on Doyoung's thigh.

You can't snatch glances at Mark anymore because he's looking right at you, his eyes filled with something you haven't seen before..lust? Maybe your tipsiness is altering the situation but you like it.

“Shall we play truth or dare?” Lucas grins, clapping his hands.

“Let’s just do truths, we’re in public,” Jaehyun points out.

“I second that! But this stays between us, company oath,” Mina says, taking an empty soju bottle and spinning it on the table.

The bottle lands on Jungwoo first and Jaehyun and Mark nudge him on either side, laughing.

“Jungwoo! Who would you date out of everyone here?” Mina asks.

Jungwoo’s eyes are playful and he throws his head back laughing.

“You want me to be completely honest? I’d probably say Lucas,” he says without hesitating.

Everyone is laughing and teasing the pair, except for Mina who nudges Lucas in the ribs to stop him from smirking.

“Moving on, where is the riskiest place you’ve ever had sex?” Jaehyun asks, spinning the bottle as it lands on Mark.

Mark rubs at his nose, looking at you momentarily. You pretend to focus on your soju shot but you’re listening carefully.

“I mean…a car I guess?” Mark chuckles, he’s bright red now and you feel jealousy rising inside of you.

Why were you jealous? He wasn’t even your boyfriend.

Johnny is ruffling his hair but Mark looks up at you, looking slightly shifty. Maybe you understand how Mina feels now. You can’t look at him.

“Okay, moving on,” Mark says taking the bottle, “Do you like anyone here?”

It lands on Jaemin and he reclines back in his seat. He raises an eyebrow, “Sure, they like me too.”

Everyone laughs at that and Jeno just shakes his head cutely, everyone knowing they’re practically an item at this point.

“Who would you make out with right now if we were doing dares?” Jaemin asks.

The bottle lands on Johnny. It’s Mark’s turn to pat Johnny on the back now and Johnny just smiles to himself.

“Aren’t you gonna answer, Johnny?” Yuta laughs.

“I’d make out with y/n” Johnny shrugs.

There are collective gasps, and you can feel everyone’s eyes on you. That wasn’t what he was supposed to answer, surely? He had a girlfriend; he could’ve passed on the answer. You look up at Johnny and as if reading your thoughts, he shrugs.

“I had to answer,” he says, putting his hands up defensively.

You laugh then, typical Johnny.

There’s a playful glint in Mark’s eye. Was he that unaffected? You suddenly felt annoyed, foolish for feeling jealous about Mark’s confession.

“If you could have a threesome with two people here, who would they be?” Johnny asks.

It lands on Yerin then, who is already flushed with embarrassment at the question.

“Doyoung, and hmm..” she pauses looking around, “Probably y/n, because we’ve seen each other naked.”

“What?!” Mark, Lucas and Jaehyun say simultaneously. Mark just about chokes on his soju.

“Calm down Mark, looks like someone’s getting a bit turned on,” Yuta winks but Mark’s eyes are still wide, shocked by Yerin’s statement.

Yerin was your best friend, all best friends had seen each other naked. It was perfectly normal. At least it was for you two.

“It’s a girl thing,” Yerin says simply, taking another shot.

“Oh! I have a good one,” Yuta says grabbing the bottle, “Have you masturbated thinking about anyone around this table?”

Of course it lands on you. To be honest, you had touched yourself thinking about 3 separate people at the table but no one needed to know that. Everyone’s silent and you don’t know where to look. You could lie, it would save your reputation but where would the fun be in that? You were all as tipsy as each other. So you reply with a small “yes” instead.

“Who was it?” Jaehyun asks.

“I’m not gonna answer that,” you laugh.

You try not to blush but you can’t help it and cover your face with your hands momentarily.

“She’s thinking about them again!” Yerin nudges your shoulder.

You didn’t want to look, you didn’t want to see if Mark was staring at you so you take the bottle to ask the next question quickly.

“How many people have you slept with in total?” you ask, spinning again.

It lands on Doyoung, his eyes are wide and he looks confused, you can’t help but laugh at his cute expression.

Yerin is smirking, expectant.

“Hmm...maybe fifteen?” Doyoung says, tilting his head.

“Fifteen! No way,” Johnny laughs but Doyoung just nods.

“You said you wanted the truth.”

Yerin looks slightly pissed as she pours another shot of soju. It’s only when Doyoung whispers in her ear that her frown softens into a slight smile. She’s got it bad, you thought.

“Let’s stop the game now, I don’t want to hear all these details,” Mina says, side-eyeing Lucas.

“Yeah I didn’t even get picked,” Haechan huffs, “Let’s just drink a bit more!”

"Hey," Yerin murmurs in your ear over the noise a few moments later, "I'm going home with Doyoung, I'll see you on Monday."

"You naughty girl! Have fun," you laugh. She blows you a flirtatious kiss as she leaves, her arm in Doyoung's.

It's gone midnight when you and your remaining coworkers spill out onto the street.

"To the next bar, let's go!" Haechan shouts, stumbling as Johnny props him up.

"Dude, you've had way too much to drink. I'm getting you in a taxi," Johnny says.

Sooji and Jaehyun also opt for getting taxis, following Johnny down the street.

"Are you coming y/n? Mark?" Jaehyun calls.

"I think I'm going to get some food first, I'll see you guys on Monday," you say before you realize. You're not even hungry.

"Yeah me too, see you later!" Mark waves.

You say your goodbyes, leaving you and Mark to walk the opposite way. Mark follows your step, but he's taking his tie off, undoing his top button because he's hot from drinking even though it's the middle of December. The sight of him makes your stomach flip.

"You don't think they'll suspect anything, about you coming home with me?" you ask suddenly.

Mark raises an eyebrow and looks at you, "Who said I'm coming home with you? I thought you wanted food."

"Yeah...yeah, just they might think something else."

Mark shrugs, "Do you care what they think?"

"No, and I guess everyone's fucking each other anyway," you say emphatically.

"Exactly. Everyone in the office knows we're friends, let them think what they want," Mark says.

"I guess you're right."

"So where are we going?"

"McDonald's?" you ask.

"I don't really feel like food, to be honest," Mark chuckles.

You turn to Mark, "You're seriously just gonna watch me eat?"

He shrugs, "Why not?"

His eyes are glazed over and shiny from the alcohol, his lips formed into a little pout. It takes everything in you not to kiss him right there and then on the street.

"You're so weird when you're drunk," you say instead, "Seriously, where do you want to go? If you're not going to eat, we might as well go home. I mean...you go to yours and I go to mine."

Mark pulls at his ear, thinking for a moment. But it doesn't really look like he's thinking, more like pretending to think. You can see the trace of a smirk hiding on his lips. This whole conversation feels weirdly contrived. You want him and you're pretty sure he feels the same way.

"I could come with you? Just, you know, to make sure you get home safe," Mark blurts out.

You can't take it anymore. You want Mark Lee so bad it hurts. "Right, okay...well, shall we go now?"

Mark nods and you haul a taxi, just as it starts raining.

♡

Mark is stood in your bedroom doorway, looking as awkward as when you first met him. Now you're not so sure if it was a good idea to invite him in.

"I'll sleep on the sofa if you want," he insists but both of you know it means nothing.

You laugh, "Mark, you can sleep in my bed, it's alright. You can sleep on the left side, I'll sleep on the right if you want."

He smiles in response but doesn't move.

"Seriously Mark, I'm not going to bite," you say patting at the bed.

He sits down gingerly then.

"Your apartment is decorated so nicely," he says looking around your room.

You can see the moon outside of your window, already on its descent for another night.

When you turn back to look at Mark, his eyes are on you. You don't know what to say, but you know what you want to do.

"Can I kiss you ?" he asks, confirming your thoughts. He looks down at your lips and back up to your eyes again.

You nod your head, you can't talk but it doesn't matter because Mark is already leaning in and then his lips are moving against yours. His lips taste faintly of soju, but you don't care. You want to taste him and you slide your tongue against his, suddenly feeling desperate. He takes the hint because you're both taking off each other's clothes then until you're both just in your underwear.

"Wait," Mark says, his hands faltering, "Do you think we should be doing this?"

It's dark, only a street lamp and the moon partially illuminating the room. The raindrops are highlighted and cling to the windowpane. You feel melancholic and you realize now more than ever that you want to be held by Mark. You can make out Mark's expression, a mix of flustered and horny rolled into one. You know he wants this too, this dorky, shy intern who was barely able to make eye contact with you is now in your bed.

"Why not? There's nothing wrong with what we're doing."

That's all the confirmation he needs because he starts to plant kisses on your neck. You stroke his hair as he makes his way down to your boobs.

"You're so hot" he murmurs, taking off your bra.

He nuzzles his face into your chest, breathing heavily before taking one of your boobs in his mouth. He swirls his tongue around your nipple first and then sucks again. His tongue feels warm and wet against your skin. He looks up at you, his eyes wide and needy.

"God that feels so good - keep doing that," you breathe.

He hums in response against your boob and you shiver. You want to keep hearing him, that voice that you've dreamt about for nights on end.

Mark lifts you to sit on his lap and you can feel his hardness pressing against you.You guide Mark's head back up to meet yours and you're both kissing again. You grind down on him, both knowing you need this. You want to feel him against you and you can't control it. Your movements are instinctual. Mark understands because he's bucking his hips up to meet yours, despite still having his boxers on. You can hear him grunt into the kiss.

"Do you have a condom?" you sigh.

"Shit, no."

You break apart briefly, Mark's eyes are hooded and his lips are swollen. You're almost certain that you look the same.

"It's okay," you say, getting off his lap to sit next to him.

"Wait - what are you doing then?" he asks, a trace of disappointment in his voice.

"What does it look like I'm doing," you say, pushing him lightly so he's lying down on the bed.

You pull off his trousers and he helps by kicking them at the ankles. He's eager now, his eyes hungry.

You pull down his boxers next until he's lying there, his beautiful, fully naked body exposed. You can see the shadowed contours of his lean body, the smoothness of his skin.

You kiss on his thighs, his skin is so soft and you hear his breath hitch as you do it. He's completely turned on now, you're satisfied knowing you've done this to him. So satisfied that you begin rubbing your clit in slow motions as your face hovers over Mark's crotch.

You take his dick with your free hand and pump it in your hand a couple of times. The tip is wet already and you kiss it, the precum on your lips. He whimpers then and you circle your clit quicker, feeling yourself growing wetter. As you lick Mark's tip, his hips raise to meet your mouth.

"I can't show my face when I'm like this," he murmurs, putting your bed pillow over his face.

"No, I want to see you," you say, climbing up to take the pillow.

Mark just turns his face to the side in response, too horny to argue.

You take him fully in your mouth, bobbing up and down slowly before finding a steady rhythm. He groans in time to your sucking motion.

"Fuck y/n, I'm gonna cum soon," he moans.

You hum against his dick, "You taste so good, Markie. Please cum for me."

He holds your head, pushing it down to reach his raised hips and you can feel yourself choking as his tip touches the back of your throat.

"I'm so...close, fuck" he moans, thrusting into your mouth.

He whimpers and wriggles beneath you, before jerking violently in large strokes as he cums in your mouth.

You swallow it up, but continue sucking, feeling yourself reach your own climax.

"Shit," Mark hisses.

"Oh my god, Mark -" you cry as you orgasm, your center pulsating.

You come to lie next to Mark, kissing him, open-mouthed and hungry. He can taste himself on you and he likes it.

"You were so damn good at that, y/n," Mark whispers.

"You were so good," you mirror, taking his now sweaty cheek in your hand.

"But I didn't get to do anything," Mark mumbles, placing soft, small kisses on your face.

"I came too. It was so hot seeing you like that."

"No seriously - I wanna make you cum, like for real though," he murmurs into your hair.

"Mm?"

"I know you're sleepy now but would you let me some other time?" he says in the darkness.

Mark's dark hair is plastered to his forehead now. He's hot and flushed, it makes your heart want to burst.

"Do you want to see me again? Like...outside of work I mean," you ask, brushing the hair from his eyes to look at him.

He nods, "What are you doing tomorrow?"

"Nothing, are you asking me out?" you giggle, pinching his cheek a little then.

He smiles and you know he's blushing.

"I guess you could say that, yeah," he laughs.

"I'm free then," you say, giving him a small peck on his lips.

Mark pulls you in for a hug. It seems like he wants to say something, whisper to you but you find yourself drifting in and out of sleep quickly. The sound of rain mixes with Mark's rhythmic breathing and lulls you to sleep.

♡

Mark had told you to wait on a nearby street by Apgujeong station. So you're surprised when he pulls up in front of you in his car. It's an old model, just about affordable for a student but it suits him well.

"I never knew you had a car," you point out, climbing into the passenger seat.

"What can I say, I'm a man full of surprises," he winks, laughing because he knew that was as cheesy as it sounded.

"Is where we're going a surprise too?" you ask.

"It might be," he says tapping at the steering wheel with his thumb to the beat of the music. It's a Lucky Daye song.

"You look so pretty by the way," he says, rubbing his nose slightly. You can tell he does that when he's shy.

"You don't look bad yourself," you reply. That would be an understatement, Mark looks like a full course meal right now. Skimming your eyes over his casual clothes, you remember that this was the first time you were meeting Mark outside of work.

You feel good. Despite how cold the late morning feels, the low winter sun is shining, the sky a soft blue.

"Where are you taking me?" you ask when you eventually realize that you're leaving Seoul.

Mark just taps his nose and tells you it won't be a long journey.

And he's right, in the next half an hour, you're driving on Incheon bridge, next to a stretch of blue sea.

♡

It turns out that Mark brought you to Incheon to eat.

You're sat on the floor at a low table of a seafood restaurant. Both of you know how good Incheon seafood is. There's what seems like a hundred different side dishes on the table, and despite both being big eaters, you're not sure if you'll be able to clear even half of it.

"Have the spicy seafood stew, it's delicious," Mark says, pouring you a bowl and putting it in front of you.

You take a mouthful and he's right, it is delicious. It’s warm and spicy, exactly what you need on a cold day. Mark is looking at you intently, his eyes shining like an eager puppy. He seems happy to see you enjoying your food and that warms your heart. You want to kiss him again.

“The stew is really good for a hangover too, it’s probably what you need,” he says, smiling.

“Hangover? I’m not hungover, do I look it?” You say self-consciously.

“No, no, I just meant we both drunk quite a lot last night,” he says, laughing nervously.

You blush remembering last night and then your thoughts flick back to truth or dare, and how jealous you were.

Mark must be thinking about it too. "Have you dated any of the guys at Hyphen?" he asks.

You just about choke on your stew, "No, why do you ask that?"

Mark shrugs, "I just wondered. They all speak really well of you, especially Johnny. And you're pretty, why wouldn't they want to date you?"

You laugh then, "Do they?"

Mark frowns a little, "You don't like Johnny, do you?"

"God no, we barely interact these days. No, I haven't dated any of them."

"Did you interact a lot before?" Mark asks.

"Me and Johnny? No, has Johnny said something?"

"Nah, apart from saying he’d date you last night. He just looks like he likes you," Mark says, rubbing his cheek.

You laugh a little then, "No, Johnny has a girlfriend and I wouldn't date him now even if he didn't have one."

Mark relaxes a little then.

"Is there a rule about dating coworkers then or do you just decide not to do it?"

"There's no rule, people just like to keep their personal and work lives private and often separate," you point out.

Mark thinks for a moment, toying with the noodles on his plate.

"What do you like to do, keep things private?" he asks.

"Private or public, I don't care, they can choose," you say quietly.

"Okay...that's good then," Mark says, smirking slightly.

He always has a roundabout way of saying things.

♡

It's 5 pm when the wintry sun sets in Incheon. You and Mark are walking along the beach. It's not perfect weather for it, since it's cold and you shiver in your coat but you're happy to be here with him.

"You need to dress warmer, y/n!" Mark says as he turns to you to retie your scarf properly.

He rubs his hands over your arms to warm you up.

"I'm okay - feel," you say, reaching your hand up to his cheek.

Mark searches your eyes and so it doesn't come as a surprise when he leans in and kisses you. His lips are warm and soft against yours and you feel as though you're melting. The kiss is a light, sweet one and you have to break apart because you feel giddy.

"Sorry, I couldn't help myself," he says.

"No, I like it."

You look into the fading light and see figures at the busy part of the beach in the distance. It wouldn't matter if you were publicly affectionate, no one would care. But you know if you start kissing him again, you won't want to stop.

You hear the sea breeze and then the first rainfall before you see it. It's soft and gentle but you know if you stand here for much longer that you'll catch a cold.

"Shall I take you home?" Mark asks.

You nod, feeling dazed and slightly lightheaded.

As you get into the car, Mark puts his Spotify on. 'Wait for it' by H.E.R. is first to play.

You peer over at his phone screen, it reads 'sex playlist'.

"There's no way you have a sex playlist," you laugh, pushing his arm playfully.

"Nah, it's just random," Mark bluffs, rubbing his nose in the cute way that he did.

"Well, whoever created this playlist has good taste."

"Yeah, alright, it is mine. But it doesn't mean anything," he says.

You raise an eyebrow then.

"Why doesn't it mean anything?" you ask. You don't know why you're probing but you enjoy teasing Mark, hearing him search for words to form an acceptable answer.

Mark just shrugs though, "I just like this mood...being here with you, I like it. This playlist just represents the mood."

"You're so good at bullshitting, Mark," you laugh but Mark is looking at you seriously now.

I know you on the way, but now I want it I can't take it I'm merely tryna chill, but I'm impatient Stay on my mind Can't sleep at night

“I’m being for real though. Like yesterday, I didn’t tell you but it was the first time someone’s given me head before,” he says, playing with his hoodie drawstrings.

“What? You’ve never had a blowjob before?” you ask, eyes wide.

“I’ve only dated one girl and she straight up didn’t want anything in her mouth so nah, it was the first time and it was amazing” Mark says.

“Well there’s a first time for everything,” you smile, feeling happy that you got to share that moment with Mark.

You look at each other in silence again. It’s a comfortable silence but it’s heavy with intent. You both know what’s coming.

"Y/n, you know I'm not good with words," Mark says and then he pulls you to him so that you're kissing again.

The kiss is different this time, it's slow and intense as if you're something he craves. It's the type of kiss that expresses he needs you now. His lips on yours feel so good and you kiss him back, mirroring his eagerness. Your hands are in his hair and then he bites at your bottom lip. He's gentle but it drives you crazy. His hands are travelling into your bra now.

"Mark," you whisper against his lips, "Mark we're in public."

"It's crazy, I keep wanting to kiss you," he murmurs, pressing his forehead to yours.

"I want to kiss you too, all the time," you admit.

"No one's here to see and it's dark now anyway."

You look around and Mark is right, it is dark. The rain is lashing hard against the window now, the H.E.R. track barely audible. Your breath and body heat is already steaming up the windows of the car.

"Can I touch you? I want to touch you," Mark whispers, kissing your neck.

There's no use in trying to stop, you feel your willpower disintegrating by the second. There's a desperation in Mark's voice. He's wanted this for so long, and so have you.

Before long you're a tangle of arms and legs in the backseat. Someone might find you but that prospect turns you on more than you initially thought. Your stockings and panties are pulled off and your skirt is hitched up now.

Mark hovers over you.

"Can I touch you?" he murmurs, his half-lidded eyes flick over your body.

You try to close your legs, embarrassed about being observed like this. But Mark just parts your legs with a hand, "You're so beautiful. Can I?"

You nod, you're so wet and you want to feel Mark inside you, you've needed it for so long.

Mark finds your clit easily, rubbing at it slowly but it's enough to make you wriggle underneath him.

Mark leans down to kiss you hungrily. He slips his tongue into your mouth as he continues circling your clit, faster now. You moan into the kiss and Mark bites your lip gently again. That habit he had which drove you crazy.

He breaks the kiss, still touching you and looking at you intently.

"You're so wet, do you want me that bad?" Mark teases.

You bite your lip, bucking your hips up to meet his fingers.

Mark massages you in quick circular motions. You can only focus on the sensation now, coming closer to your orgasm. Nothing matters anymore, not Mark observing your body, not the possibility of being caught by someone, nothing at all.

"Mark, Mark - please," you moan.

"Mmm?" he asks, smirking slightly.

"I want you to fuck me," you murmur, suddenly losing all inhibitions.

"But we're in public," Mark's eyes widen and you realize he's teasing you.

"Please, please fuck me, Mark."

You've never seen Mark like this before, so in control of the situation and you feel disorientated because of it.

Mark takes a condom out of his pocket then and tears it open with his mouth.

He pulls his jeans and boxers down, rolling the condom over his length. As he touches himself to adjust the condom, he suddenly looks more like his nervous, boyish self. He concentrates when he's horny and you realize how cute it is.

"I need you now, please," you whisper, feeling increasingly needy.

Mark is so soft for you, you can tell by the sudden redness of his cheeks, the begging turns him on.

"Please, Mark," you mewl, scratching lightly at his left arm propping him up over you.

Mark positions the tip against your center and you whimper at the sudden contact.

"What would the others say if they saw us like this?" Mark says.

"I don't care," you whisper, feeling even more turned on by the thought. You're not doing anything inherently bad but Mark is still your intern. Why did bad things always feel so good?

Mark’s pupils are dilated as he leans over to kiss you again, and then he slips into you without warning. You feel yourself tighten around his dick and he feels it too because he's groaning.

"Oh my god, y/n, you feel so fucking good," he moans into your mouth.

“Better than the last person you fucked in here?” you murmur.

Mark is taken aback but he clearly likes the jealous tone. He bites his lip and nods “Much better, you’re so hot, y/n.”

Mark fucks you gently, moving inside you with slow movements. His breathing hitches and he closes his eyes momentarily.

"Mark faster," you plead, your voice filled with innocence.

Mark puts a hand on your thigh and the other grabs at your boob as he starts thrusting into you harder.

"Mm fuck," you moan, feeling him hit your sweet spot.

"D-Do you like that?" Mark whispers and you can't even nod in response. You just know he feels so good.

“Who do you think of when you touch yourself?” Mark pants between groans. So he’s thinking two can play at that game.

“Ah - it’s you, I think of you Mark,” you moan.

He licks his fingers before placing them on your clit and rubbing once more. The combination makes you a moaning mess and you can't think of anything but your approaching orgasm.

“That feels good, doesn’t it?” he asks.

“My god, Mark” is all you can manage.

Mark's strokes get sloppy and he has to grip at your waist with one of his hands to keep steady. Your bodies are both damp with sweat, the leather seats of Mark's car underneath you are wet. You want to melt into Mark, you want to feel like this forever.

It doesn't take you long to orgasm. With a few more slow strokes and a rub of your clit, you pulsate around Mark's dick.

"Mark, I'm - fuck" you moan, shuddering violently with every pulse.

"You feel so fucking good," Mark grunts and his praise is enough for you to tighten around him once more. He thrusts again, groaning in your ear before he empties himself into the condom. You feel his dick twitch inside of you and pull his neck down for another kiss.

It's sloppy and needy, your tongues against each others in desperation. When Mark breaks the kiss, he collapses on top of you breathing heavily. You both lie there, trying to catch your breath. Mark's dick is still inside of you though and you can feel the warmth of it and the now filled condom.

"Shouldn't we throw the condom out?" you whisper, stroking the back of his neck.

"I like this feeling, though. Can't we just stay like this for a while?" he says and you feel shy knowing he's still inside of you, that he likes the feeling of you.

"I don't think I can keep away from you," Mark whispers into your hair.

"Me neither," you say as he props his head up to look in your eyes.

"You know yesterday I asked if you cared if people at work knew about us - did you really mean that? That you don't care?" he asks, his eyes are wide like a puppy’s and you know you're too far gone, you want Mark to be yours.

"I don't care at all, Mark", you say, stroking his hair and then his cheek.

"I'm gonna pull out now," Mark chuckles, pulling himself out of you and taking the condom off.

He pulls his boxers and jeans up and you do the same, adjusting yourself into a sitting position.

Mark opens the car to dispose of the condom. Luckily it isn't as busy as you thought outside thanks to the uninviting winter cold and darkness.

As you both get back into the front seats, you look in the mirror, fixing your hair but not bothering with your makeup, which has sweated off completely.

Mark turns to look at you, "You look beautiful, y/n. Seriously."

"Anyway why did you ask me if I care or not?" you ask, trying to change the subject because you're blushing too hard now.

Mark drives away from the parking lot and back towards Incheon bridge.

His eyes are focused on the road but you know he's thinking of what to say next.

"I was just wondering, well, if I can see you again tomorrow. For a proper date?" Mark asks.

"We did go on a proper date, Mark, we ate seafood and walked on the beach. I loved it," you say.

Mark bites at his lip. He looks nervous as if everything he's done with you so far has lead up to this moment.

"I can't lie, I really like you. Like to the point where I want to be around you all the time," Mark murmurs and his face is going bright red again.

Your stomach is fluttering from the sudden confession and you're can't look at his face anymore. You press for him to go on, though.

"Mmm?"

"Being able to talk about normal shit, do normal things, it's made me realize how much I enjoy spending time with you. I don't even want to drop you off tonight."

He clears his throat, "I think I've fallen for you, y/n. I know I sound stupid but you wanted to hear it. I like you and you don't have to accept it, we can go back to work and forget this ever happened, go back to norm-"

"Mark," you cut him off, "I like you too. I've liked you for ages, I just didn't want to be the first to admit it."

"Why?" Mark chuckles, his eyes wide. He looks genuinely taken aback.

"You're my intern! Why would I confess first? That wouldn't be professional," you laugh.

"Well we're past professional now," Mark admits, "But if anyone asks, I can just say I've been giving you a helping hand." He winks then and you can’t believe how easily you’ve fallen for this dork.

As you drive across Incheon bridge back to Seoul, you look out of the window and see the same stretch of sea that you saw on the way there. Except this time, the sea is not a glittering blue, it's black, barely noticeable against the wintry evening sky. The passage of time in Mark's company comforted you, it reaffirmed how much you wanted to see each subtle change of the world with him.

"And to be honest, I don't care if anyone at work knows. It's better if they do know we like each other," Mark says quietly, reaching out a hand to stroke yours instinctually.

"Yeah, they've probably guessed already. I don't mind though, half of them are fucking anyway."

Mark laughs at your candidness. "For real though, the number of times I've seen Jaemin and Jeno come out of the unused toilet together is crazy."

"Don't forget Lucas and Mina in the stock cupboard," you point out, giggling.

"We're going to have to find our own spot before they're all taken up," Mark says, his tongue poking at his cheek. He was such a tease.

You could see the first few stars sprinkled across the sky through the car windscreen. The rain had cleared and it was one of those beautiful, chilly winter nights. Still, the stars made you feel solitary.

"I don't want to be alone tonight," you admit to Mark quietly.

Mark nods "I'll stay. So the cinema and aquarium tomorrow, how does it sound?"

"It sounds lovely," you smile.

You see the city skyline in the distance, nothing more than a cluster of twinkling dots. You're excited, the night is young and filled heavy with promise.

577 notes · View notes

moeyy-writes · 3 years

Text

Second Chance

Zak Bagans x Fem!Reader

Warnings: angst, arguing (nothing violent), mention of break-ups, happy ending (with fluff!). Oh, and a super cheesy, silly title. Let me know if I’m missing anything.

Word Count: 3.3k

My Master List

Zak lifted his head as a purple glimmer caught his eye. The room around him was loud, and the lights were flashing in a nauseatingly rapid rhythm. Why the hell did Aaron drag him to a place like this, especially when they had a lockdown the next night? He should be resting and reserving his strength, not wasting his time in some random Vegas nightclub.

It’s a good distraction, Aaron had told him. Although the music wasn’t bad, it wasn’t exactly Zak’s scene. Not anymore, anyway. He preferred less people, and more intimate conversation.

But, right now, he was mentally thanking his best friend for dragging him to this god-awful place as his eyes lifted to a familiar face in not-so-familiar clothing.

“Y/N?” He greeted you, his eyes scanning up and down your glittery purple dress. The deep cut accented your curves better than anything he had seen, and the length was shorter than he ever imagined you wearing.

Not that he was complaining one bit. You looked beautiful.

“Uh, hiya Zak.” You glanced around. “What the hell are you doing here?”

There was no way in hell Zak was there on purpose. He hated places like that, you knew that. But, you remembered seeing Aaron a few minutes earlier, which meant the other paranormal investigator wasn’t far behind.

It had been two weeks since the two of you had talked, and a day less since you had resigned from the show. The last time you talked to the blue-eyed lead investigator, he had admitted to you that he had more than platonic feelings for you. So, you ran.

It wasn’t that you didn’t share those feelings. No, it was quite the opposite. You had been harboring feelings for the older man for at least the past year, probably longer. But, there was no way he truly felt the same way. You knew Zak wasn’t the kind of person to stick around in a relationship for long, and you didn’t want to be the latest victim.

Zak glanced around, as if he was desperately searching for his partner in crime. But, the older friend was nowhere to be found. So, he relaxed his shoulders and locked his gaze on yours.

“Aaron dragged me here as a ‘distraction’. I guess that failed miserably, thank god.” He smiled sweetly, then his expression turned serious. “I’ve been calling you for days. I left voicemails. We thought something bad happened to you.”

You rolled your eyes and sighed. You didn’t want to be there either. Honestly, you had no idea why you were there. Distraction was the best word you could come up with. You were hoping to pick up someone to keep your mind off the man you wanted, but knew you could never have.

“Well, I’m alive, and I’m probably not going to be in town for much longer. I took a job in California. My condo there is going to be about a third the size and the same price as the one I have here, but it looks like a nice area.” You peered away, unable to look him directly in the eye. But, even in your peripheral vision, you could see the pain on his face.

“You’re moving? Wow. I guess I never saw that coming.” His voice was softer, almost hard to hear against the pounding music. His shoulders sank more in defeat, making your stomach ache. You knew he felt something for you, but it wouldn’t last. He’d get over you just as fast as the others you had seen come and go.

“Yeah, it’s a good gig. It’s with a news station outside of Sacramento. I’ll be editing their videos before they air.” Zak’s eyes remained wide and painful. You had been friends for years and had been on the show for about half a decade. So, it was obviously a shock to him when you resigned. It was a shock for everyone.

Billy, Aaron, and Jay had also left you multiple voicemails asking where you were and if you were okay. Hell, even Dakota reached out to see what was going on. You knew they loved you and cared, but you weren’t one for goodbyes, and you definitely didn’t want to think about Zak anymore.

“Y/N, we miss you. The last investigation wasn’t the same without you.” He stared down at his feet. “You didn’t even give an explanation. We thought you were in some kind of trouble.”

You narrowed your gaze. “Zak, don’t be stupid. You know exactly why I left.” Your body tensed. Was he really that naïve? Or was he in denial?

“What?” You rolled your eyes.

“Zak, what was our last conversation about?” You crossed your arms over your chest. He wasn’t this dumb. He wasn’t dumb at all. Sure, he had a dorky sense of humor, but he was brilliant. He had to know what was really going on.

His eyes widened again, this time in realization. “Wait, you left because I told you that I love you?” Bingo.

“Zak, do you know how many women I’ve heard you say that to, just for you to toss them to the curb within a few months? You haven’t had the best track record over the years I’ve known you.” You sighed in frustration. “You love ‘em and leave ‘em pretty quickly. I didn’t want to be another statistic.”

Zak slammed his back into the cement wall behind him. His gaze left you, hazing over with an emotion you couldn’t quite recognize. His tight, black shirt hugged his chest as he crossed his arms.

“You think I picked you as a target or something? Y/N, I wouldn’t have told you I loved you after five years if I didn’t mean it! I wouldn’t risk our entire friendship over something like that!” Zak’s chest heaved as his voice got louder. “I know I’ve had several girlfriends since I’ve met you, and I know none of them ever turned out to be much of anything. But, I didn’t know them for more than a week before things progressed. I didn’t have the time to get to know them like I know you.”

You clenched your teeth as you listened to his words. Oh, so he loved you because he knew you long enough to realize you weren’t after his money and fame? Great.

“Zak, why the fucking hell didn’t you say anything before? You’ve had five years to realize your feelings for me, to say something. We’ve traveled all over the country together for years, and we live within four miles of each other. Why are you just saying something now?” You could feel the frustration, and heartbreak, washing over you.

“Because it didn’t seem like you were going to be the one to say it.” You blinked as you took a half-step back.

“Excuse me?”

Zak smirked, pissing you off even more. “You think I didn’t notice they way you looked at me when you thought I wasn’t looking? Or how your hand lingered on my shoulder a little too long while we looked over evidence at Nerve? Y/N, I’m not blind.”

Shit. Shit, fuck, damn. He wasn’t blind at all. And, you were sure that the others saw it too. You had flirted with him for as long as you could remember, to the point that it became second nature.

“I didn’t say anything for the same reason I left. I didn’t want to be another Zak Bagans statistic.”

Zak unfolded his arms and stared at you. His eyes were dark, but not with anger, but pain. He tilted his head ever so slightly as he took a step forward.

“Y/N, do you really think I’m that much of a monster? After all of these years, spending weeks at a time with each other, do you really think that I’m incapable of loving someone?” Your heart was about to pound out of your chest. No, you didn’t think he was a monster. Hell, you loved him for how caring and kind he was to everyone around him. He may have carried a cocky, bad-boy persona, but he was really a complete marshmallow under those muscles.

“I don’t think that. I just saw a pattern and didn’t want to be a part of it.” Zak just nodded at your words, leaning back against the wall. You could see his thoughts forming behind his eyes. His face was surprisingly soft, considering his obvious anger.

Zak nodded as he sighed. “Y/N, do you know what the problem was with those other girls?” He let out a sigh. “They weren’t you—”

“Oh, don’t give me that cliché crap, Zak.” You rolled your eyes, unable to contain a frustrated chuckle.

“I mean it. I know it sounds cheesy, but you know me. That’s my humor. And, that’s my entire point. You know me, my humor, and almost everything that swims around in my weirdo brain. And, for a while, I think that scared me. But, now I know that’s something special. You get me like those other girls didn’t. I mean, you know me in ways most other people in my life don’t.”

He wasn’t wrong. When he needed someone to talk to, and Aaron was busy, he called you. He knew you’d give him an ear at three in the morning and would help him with just about anything. And, until now, it was a two-way street. He was there for you whenever you needed someone.

And that was what set you apart from the others. You bothered to know him. You quickly realized that he reached out to you even when he was in a relationship. He didn’t go to whoever he was dating at the time because they didn’t listen like you did.

They didn’t care like you did.

“Fuck,” you muttered. “Zak, I—” Tears threatened in your eyes. It was you who was blind all this time. And now you had pushed away the man you loved when he said he loved you back.

You turned away from him, squeezing your eyes shut. Who cared if your mascara was waterproof or not? You didn’t care what you looked like, or where you were anymore. All you could think about was the pain in your chest.

“I’m sorry, Zak. I have to go—”

“No! I’m not letting you walk away again. Y/N, I know you didn’t mean to hurt me. I get it. I know what you saw.” Zak reached out, gently taking you upper arm.

“It’s what I didn’t see that’s killing me now,” you muttered, nearly drowned out by the music.

Zak turned you back towards him, smiling sweetly at you. “I know. I get it. I think we both do.” He glanced around the packed room. “How about we take a step outside so we don’t lose our voices,” he suggested with his award-winning smile.

It was his softness that sent you over the edge. You let the tears fall as they nodded, allowing your best friend to lead you out of that bustling club and onto the quieter, cooler sidewalk outside.

It took you a few minutes to form another coherent thought; your mind was reeling. Zak wasn’t the monster, you were. Not that you actually thought he was a monster, but this whole situation made you feel like the biggest nightmare of a person one could ever think up. You had to just run from a scary situation instead of being a grown ass woman and expressing your fears. You had been able to openly talk about all sorts of emotions on the show when you were with the guys. But, when it came to actual adult emotions, you ran.

Very mature.

And now you probably skewed the way Zak thought of you for the worse, and there was probably no coming back.

Zak leaned down in attempt to meet your tear-filled gaze. “Y/N, tell me what you’re feeling right now.” You sucked in a whimper and squeezed your eyes shut, letting a new stream of tears free.

“I feel like a fucking idiot. I feel like I royally screwed up and I’ve ruined something I wanted for years, but never thought could happen. I-I don’t know. I don’t know what to think now.” Your voice trembled. You were tired of trying to look tough. It was too exhausting.

“You aren’t an idiot. You were scared, and you weren’t seeing the whole picture. I get that. And I forgive you, not that I really think that I need to forgive you for anything.” His hand cupped your cheek and lifted your head up. “This whole thing was a huge misunderstanding.”

“Definitely. I’m so sorry I wasn’t there when you needed me most, Zak. I did what those other girls did when you needed someone. I’m so sorry—”

“No, don’t be. I told you, Y/N, I understand. Fear makes us do stupid thing. Out of everyone in the world, I know you know that.” He sucked in a long breath, then let out a shaky sigh. “I love you, Y/N. I do. I don’t just throw those words around. I love you so much, and I have for a long time. If you want to move to California, I get it.”

Shit. Fucking shitty fuck. You clenched your teeth. What the hell have you done?

“I—well—not really. Shit, Z, I really fucked up.” Your mind raced as your breathing quickened. Your head started to feel funny, but you tried to keep yourself grounded. “I mean, I haven’t sold my condo yet, and I can withdraw from my offer on the one in Sacramento. And I can decline the job. But, I left the show. I don’t have a job anymore.” Your words came out in panicked breaths as your hands clenched into fists.

Zak smirked. “Well, if you do want to stick around, I think I can pull a few strings and get you your old job back. I mean, we haven’t replaced you or anything. It’s not like we could if we tried.” You nodded slowly, taking everything in.

“Zak, I’m so sorry,” you muttered as you reached out, wrapping your arms around his shoulders. His arms quickly supported your waist, cradling you against his chest. He gently rubbed circles with one hand on your back.

“Hey, shhh, it’s okay. Y/N, it’s alright.” You nodded against his chest, repeating the mantra in your head. After a few minutes, you started to believe it. Everything was going to be okay. You were there, and you just happened to run into Zak that night. Not that you were much of a believer in fate, but that had to mean something.

After a while, you pulled away from him. You peered up at him, fully aware that you had proven your mascara was less that waterproof.

“I’m sorry Zak.” You nibbled nervously on your lower lip.

He just shook his head. “I know, Y/N. You don’t need to keep saying it. I told you, I forgive you, not that I blame you for anything.” He reached head hand out. “So, are you staying after all?”

You nodded. “Yeah, I’m staying.” Zak’s smile stretched across his lips.

“Good. And what about us?” Your heart raced like it did just a few weeks ago, when he admitted his feelings for you. But, you sure as fuck weren’t going to run this time.

“I love you too, Zak. You already know that. I know I’ve done a piss-poor job of showing that over the last few weeks. I have some catching up to do.” You finally smiled under the drying tears. Zak chuckled, shaking his head.

“Bullshit. You’ve done enough over the years. No catch up needed, just a little Dijon mustard.” You blinked for a moment, then busted into laughter. He could never pass up a pun, no matter the circumstance.

“Oh my god, Zak,” you chuckled. “Really? Now?” You couldn’t stop laughing, which only made him smile wider.

“Hey, I made you smile. I call that a win.” He wrapped his arms around you again, causing your heart to speed up yet again. This time, you welcomed the feeling, loving the way you felt at home in his arms.

You glanced up at Zak and sighed. “Well, I guess there is no point in either of us being here, huh? I mean, I look like a fucking mess, and well, I guess my original plan is no longer happening.” Zak raised in eyebrow and huffed a laugh.

“Wait, what was your original plan?” His face tensed as he came to a realization. “Never mind, I don’t want to know. Either way, you look stunning.” You blushed under the streams of black mascara you were sure were plaguing your face.

“Thanks, Zak.”

You glanced around, eyeing the door as people came and went around you. You had totally forgotten about Aaron. Had Zak driven there with him? Or was Zak Aaron’s ride home?

“I hope Aaron is okay in there,” you mentioned casually, not wanting to sound too nosy. Zak’s eyes widened.

“Oh, man. He probably thinks I either went home with someone or got lost. Probably the latter.” Zak reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone. His screen was littered with notifications, probably from Aaron. Zak rolled his eyes. “Yep, he thinks I’m lost.” You both laughed.

“Did he drive you here? Is he okay to drive home?” Zak shook his head.

“Nah, we got a cab. He’s probably loaded. We should fine him before he hurts himself.” Zak and you rolled your eyes in sync, then laughed. He was probably right, there was no way Aaron and alcohol were ever a good mix, especially when he was alone.

“Good idea.” You took Zak’s arm and made your way for the door.

Zak paused a few steps from the door. “Did you drive here?” You shook your head. “Do you want to ride with us? We can go back to my place for a while and just, I dunno, do something boring. If you want to talk more, we can do that. Or, we can just watch a movie or whatever. I just know that I don’t like being alone after emotional situations like this, and I know you’re the same way.” He placed his hand over yours, which rested softly on his arm. “No pressure.”

He knew you all too well.

“Yeah, that actually sounds great. I wouldn’t mind a movie in your fancy shmancy theater.” You grinned as Zak chuckled.

“Deal. I don’t know what my inventory situation is on popcorn, but we’ll survive.” You nodded in agreement, then went to take a step towards the door, but Zak gently stopped you. You turned to him, raising a brow.

“Zak?” He just smiled at you for a moment.

“One more thing.” You should have seen this coming. He reached out and took your jaw gently in his other hand, then leaned in, pressing his lips to yours.

You gasped as you made contact, but quickly eased into it. He lingered, letting out a low laugh, before pulling away. You followed him as he leaned back, not wanting to separate just yet.

“I’ve been wanting to do that for a long time,” Zak whispered. You rolled your eyes and shoved his chest. He truly was the king of cliches.

“Oh my god, you cheeseball! One serious moment is all I ask of you!” you teased, before taking his arm again.

“You’ll get one of those at some point, hopefully.” You rolled your eyes for the millionth time.

“Way to keep me on my toes, handsome,” you retorted. Then, you followed him back into the club in search of your friend.

Thanks for reading! Feedback is appreciated! <3

#zak bagans x reader #zak bagans #zak bagans and reader #zak bagans reader insert #aaron goodwin #gac #ghost adventures

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fleetingpieces · 3 years

Text

My One in a Million Chapter 2

Thank you @inloveoknutzy for proofreading and support <3 and @lumosinlove for your amazing OCs!!

You can read Chapter 1 here

Chapter 2 - Bad habits

“So how’s that new apartment of yours?” Alice asked over the phone. “I can’t believe you didn’t call me sooner, are you already too much of a star for your commoner friends?”

Remus laughed goodheartedly as he sat down on his bed. He’d missed Alice’s voice.

“C’mon, I’m by no means a star. And I would never forget about my best friend, you know that.”

“Ohh good, I finally dethroned Leo?”

“Ok, let me rephrase that. I would never forget about my midget best friend,” Remus corrected and laughed again when Alice cursed at him. “I’m sorry Al, it’s just been a very busy couple of weeks.”

Remus glanced around his room. It looked much more homier now that everything had been unpacked and he’d gotten himself a few paintings and decorations. Everything looked exactly as he’d imagined, and Remus felt a sense of contentment at the image.

He closed his eyes, letting the sun warm up his skin and enjoying the light breeze drifting in through the open balcony door. But when he breathed in, a strong smell of nicotine wafted to his nose.

“Fuck, not again,” Remus groaned, raking a hand over his face with an exasperated sigh.

“What? What’s wrong?” Alice asked.

“My asshole of a neighbour. I swear to god Alice, it’s like he does it on purpose.”

Throwing himself down on the bed, Remus pinched the bridge of his nose. He tried to remind himself that the guy wasn’t technically doing anything wrong at the moment, but this little thing together with everything else was cutting Remus’ patience short.

“Uh oh, are you having trouble already?”

Remus snorted.

“You could say that.” He focused on breathing in and out before launching on a rant. “I have this beautiful balcony with a view, but I can never leave the door open cause he’s always smoking outside and somehow the smell always gets into my room which is fucking annoying.”

“Well...I guess it could be worse?” Alice said uncertainly after a moment.

“That’s not all. He sometimes leaves the garbage right outside his door for hours. I don’t know what the hell he does at midnight, but I can hear his music at the weirdest hours, and then out of nowhere there are loud screams coming through the walls.”

Alice snorted and Remus rolled his eyes.

“Not that type of screams. Like angry screams?”

As the smell became too much, Remus got up and started walking towards the door.

“And the weirdest thing is, there’s so many people coming in and out from that apartment all the time. Every day. I swear, it’s ridiculous. Is he a drug dealer or something?”

Remus thought about the past week and how confusing it had been, as he’d bumped into a lot of weird, different people.

On Monday, when he was coming back from finally doing grocery shopping, he got into the elevator with a guy with messy hair and glasses. The guy was smiling so much it was a bit weird, but he was nice enough to hold the door for Remus when they were getting off. Remus smiled as well and nodded before going to his apartment and watching as the guy disappeared next door.

On Tuesday, a bloke with red hair was going out just as Remus was coming back home; they exchanged a ‘good afternoon’ and they each went their way.

On Wednesday a tall, dark, handsome stranger smiled and winked at Remus.

Thursday, a woman with red hair and green eyes struck up an animated conversation with him when he was coming back from his morning run. Remus had actually liked her, she seemed very nice and easygoing. He wondered if she was related to the guy he’d seen on Tuesday.

When Friday came around, he’d been slightly wary as he’d stepped out to take Cocoa to the park nearby. Almost as if on cue, he heard a door open and close when he was going to the lift, and soon he was joined by a shorter man with tan skin, a snapback on his head with dark curls slipping out.

He’d had to wonder if it was some sort of silly prank. It couldn’t be a coincidence. Cause every day, for a week, he’d bumped into a different person every time he went out or came back to his apartment.

All of them coming and going from apartment number 12.

Just how many people lived there? He'd casually asked the concierge about it and was surprised when the man said it was just one guy. Someone called Black, whose description matched the one of the first guy he’d met in the building.

Alice’s huffed laugh brought him back to the present as he reached the door and peered outside. And then he felt his breath catch in his throat.

Black was standing on the edge of the balcony closer to Remus’ own, and had his back turned on him. A very tanned, muscular, bare back. Remus cursed under his breath. The guy was only wearing a pair of sweatpants, and was leaning on the rail as he exhaled a plume of smoke. The way the sun reflected beautifully over his skin and dark hair had to be illegal.

“And he’s hot! Really, his back is so sexy it’s unfair!” he said as he closed the door a bit harder than he’d meant to.

Alice cackled on the other end of the line.

“Well Rem, at least you have something to look at,” she teased. “Why don’t you go say something to him?

“I would rather avoid confrontation so early on,” Remus said as he leaned back on the glass panel, ignoring Alice’s first statement. He didn’t want to have his first neighbor fight not even two weeks after moving in. But the guy was just getting on Remus' nerves, and even if he didn’t want to be that neighbour, he knew he would soon need to set some boundaries.

“I’m sorry about that sweetie,” Alice said in a sympathetic tone. Remus hummed in reply. “I hope it didn’t ruin the excitement of moving in.”

“Nah, it’s alright. It would be nice if we could get along, but worse comes to worse I’ll just have a talk and that’s it. We don’t have to be friends or anything,” Remus decided not to mention the issue with his Mum’s painting, otherwise Alice might just show up here to kick the guy’s ass herself. Smiling slightly at the idea of tiny Alice standing up to that guy, Remus glanced at the clock and cursed. “I’m sorry Al, I gotta run or I’ll be late for my first class.”

“Ok, I’ll talk to you later, yeah? Don’t be a stranger!”

“Yeah, yeah, bye Alice!”

As soon as Remus hung up, he scrambled through his room to grab everything he needed. He stopped only for a minute to fill Cocoa’s bowl and pet him on the head before heading out, thanking the heavens that for once, there wasn’t anyone waiting for him in the hallway.

Remus had been working non stop ever since he’d started gaining popularity online, and took a few days off to adjust to his new living space before he started working at the new studio. Not that he’d completely stopped, what with making and editing videos for the page.

Some students were already waiting when Remus arrived, but he was just in time. For the first time ever he had a fully booked class, and even some people in a waiting list in case any space would free up. Remus was so thrilled, he couldn’t keep a smile from his face.

He looked around when he entered the room where he would be imparting the yoga lesson, and the first thing that caught his eye was a head of flaming hair.

The girl was wearing black leggings and a loose shirt, and Remus recognized her at once from last Thursday. She glanced up, and surprise crossed her face before she broke out in a smile.

"Hello! You're from Sirius' building aren't you? Are you here to take this class as well?"

Remus wasn't sure who Sirius was, but given the fact that she had been to the apartment next door, Remus figured it must be his dear neighbor.

Sirius Black.

Even his name was pretentious.

"Ah, no, I'm actually the new instructor," Remus said, smiling shyly.

"Oh that's great!" the woman beamed. "My friend Natalie recommended your class, said I would not regret it. So, you're Remus?"

Remus nodded, rubbing the back of his neck.

"Yeah, pleased to properly meet you um.."

"Lily," she smiled, and Remus couldn't help but return it. It was so easy to talk to her.

Remus moved to start setting up his things while they waited for the last few students to arrive. Lily followed.

"Natalie should be here any minute, she was super excited about this. Apparently, you're pretty famous! I don't pay much attention to social media, so I haven't heard from you before." Lily smiled apologetically, but Remus waved her off.

"Oh that's not true, I'm just a normal guy that happened to have a bit of luck. I do hope you enjoy the class though." He bit his lip, wondering if he should ask the next question or if he would come off as a prying old lady, but then curiosity got the better of him. "What's the deal with all the people in that apartment? Do you all secretly live there?"

A dark look crossed Lily's face, but it was gone in a second and replaced by a small worried frown.

"No, that's just Sirius' home. I'm sorry about all the trouble, I swear it's not always like that,” she said, tugging at a strand of her hair. “Things should calm down soon...I hope."

Remus wasn't sure what that meant, but he knew asking more about it would be too nosy. It was none of his business after all, he just wanted some peace and quiet.

"Oh, I know!” Lily suddenly perked up. “We're throwing a Halloween party at Sirius' in two weeks, why don't you come over? That way you can meet everyone!"

Remus schooled his features carefully to avoid cringing. He didn't particularly like parties, the smell of smoke and alcohol, the inebriated people doing stupid shit, the many mistakes made in the thrill of the moment...yeah, Remus could live without all that crap.

"I don't know, Lily...I don't think I'm invited." And that guy and I don't really get along well, he thought.

But Lily just rolled her eyes.

"I just invited you. That flat is almost like my own home, so Sirius won't mind me inviting someone over, if that's what you are worried about."

Remus busied himself searching his bag for nothing in particular, wondering if Lily and Sirius were dating. They certainly seemed really close to each other, he could tell by the way she said his name; but how could someone as nice as Lily date that ass?

"C'mon, it'll be fun! You can make new friends, and that way it won't be so weird if you bump into any of them in the hallways again."

"I'll think about, ok?" Remus said to appease her, but he knew there was no way he'd be going to that party.

However, the look Lily gave him and the glint in her green eyes told him she wouldn't let him off so easily.

***

Later that night, Remus was sitting by the window of his living room, meditating. He’d gotten into the habit of doing it when he needed to wind down, or when there was too much on his head; and today, after a long day back at teaching, it was a good way for him to relax.

And for once, everything was quiet. No loud music coming through the walls, no people shuffling about all over the building, even the city outside seemed quieter than usual, and Remus basked in the silence that filled his ears as he breathed in deeply.

Or at least he did until he heard a loud whoop that almost made him jump out of his skin. What the hell was that?

A string of muffled words and a loud laugh followed as Remus sat there with a hand over his racing heart, trying to calm down. And even then, with his breathing completely messed up, Remus surprised himself thinking it was the first time he’d heard laughter from next door instead of just shouts, and how oddly familiar it sounded.

“For fucks sake,” he muttered, getting up.

He’d finally had enough. He’d tried to let it be and avoid confrontation, but was it really that hard to be considerate? Did he think he was the only person living here?

Breathing out, Remus made his way through the hall and knocked on the door. There was no response at first, but the noise inside quieted down. Remus waited for a bit before knocking again, a little louder than before. This time there were approaching footsteps on the other side, and he was pretty sure he could hear someone cursing.

Remus was going over his speech in his head, trying to figure out the best way to talk to this person, but as soon as the door opened, all words disappeared from his mind. Actually, every thought in his brain flew out the window as he was met by stormy grey eyes boring into his.

It was the first time he was seeing Black’s face, and why the fuck did he have to be so fucking gorgeous?

He had high cheekbones, and a jaw that was screaming to be kissed; his inky black hair held in a messy bun at the top of his head, with a few strands framing his face. Remus already knew he was fit as hell, but fucking God, those eyes.

Remus’ breath caught in his throat as he took in the slightly surprised look on Black’s face, who was looking him up and down. It was then that Remus realized he was so pissed that he hadn’t even thought about changing out of his yoga tights. His cheeks warmed up, and the thought of blushing in front of this guy annoyed him even more.

He glared at Black, who arched a perfect eyebrow.

“I’m sorry to disturb you,” he started, still trying to be polite, “I live next door, and I didn’t want to do this, but could you please keep it down? I’ve been listening to your music all week, and even if you have good taste it’s getting really annoying.”

You have good taste? What the hell was that? Remus chided himself.

Sirius glanced behind him at his apartment with mock surprise.

“There’s no music right now, is there?”

Remus rolled his eyes; he didn’t care how good looking this guy was, or how curious he was about the slight accent in his voice, he was absolutely obnoxious.

“Oh yeah, ‘cause the screaming is so much better,” Remus deadpanned. He thought he saw the corner of Black’s mouth quirk up, but he was still staring Remus down.

“Oh, I was just punishing the gang for not making the drugs faster,” Sirius said, and his mouth moved to the side, like he was biting the inside of his cheek to fight a smile.

Remus' eyes widened.

"Yeah, I'd invite you to come in and have a look, but it might be too hot in here," he continued in a teasing tone.

"Oh my God, you heard that?" Remus fought the urge to cover his face, which he was sure was beetroot red.

"Just bits and pieces. You were talking pretty loudly," Black said, the amused smile finally appearing on his face. He leaned with a shoulder against the doorframe, looking Remus up and down again. “But hey, I could show you more of my sexy back if you really want to.”

Remus did his best to fight his embarrassment as he squared his shoulders, his expression going hard. How did this guy manage to make him so angry every time?

“I would never want anything to do with a disrespectful, self-centered prick like you." Politeness be damned, he was not going to stand here and let this man make fun of him.

Black's eyebrows shot up in surprise, and he regarded Remus with new interest.

"I -"

Some voices came from inside the flat, and Black looked over his shoulder. When he turned back around, he looked Remus straight in the eye with a penetrating gaze.

"I will try to keep it down," and without another word, he closed the door in Remus' nose.

Remus just stood there for a few minutes with his mouth hanging open, absolutely bewildered, before a scowl took over his face. He turned around and marched straight into his apartment, closing the door behind him and taking a few slow breaths to calm himself.

When that proved fruitless for the first time in a very long while, he went straight to his computer and onto Padfoot’s channel. A pleased sigh escaped his lips when he saw that he was going live and clicked the video immediately. Padfoot hadn’t made a new video in a few days, which had been slightly worrying, so Remus was glad to see he was back.

When the video loaded though, Remus frowned. A game was being shown full screen, but the character was just standing there, not doing anything, and the only voices heard were from other players. Padfoot wasn’t there. The live chat was going crazy asking what happened, saying everything seemed fine and then Padfoot had just disappeared.

But a few seconds later Remus, heard a small laugh and a familiar voice talking to the viewers.

“Hey guys, I’m back! I’m so sorry about that, I was just very rudely interrupted. Although I must admit, it was a very interesting interruption. Anyway, let’s crack this thing, I left my partner alone for a long time and we all know he is as useful as a chocolate teapot.”

“I protected your sorry ass while you were away, and that’s the ‘thanks’ I get?” another voice came from the video with mock offense.

“Yeah, yeah, I appreciate your efforts Prongs, but we both know who's the one that gets things done here."

“Oh, yeah? It’s always like this with you, whenever you do something awesome it’s ‘Oh, look at me, I’m amazing’, and whenever you fuck up it’s ‘Oh, we are a team’.”

“That’s how teamwork works!” Padfoot said in his most convincing tone.

Remus laughed at Padfoot’s antics, feeling a lot better than a few minutes before, and started thinking about everything with a cooled head. He would have liked to get along with his neighbors, to have a quiet, happy life, but he could try to ignore him. He didn’t have to see the guy more than was strictly necessary. He wasn’t going to.

#My One in a Million #wolfstar #wolfstar fic #fanfic #sirius black #remus lupin #sirius x remus #writing #hp marauders #marauders

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hermannsthumb · 3 years

Note

From horny twitter: Hermann writes a very very detailed review of a vibrator online

not sfw below cut!!!!!!!!!!!

----------------------------

Now, usually, Newt doesn’t mess around when he’s on the clock, because that’d be very unprofessional of him and that’s totally not who he is, but he’s in a little bit of a rut with his current project and could use the distraction. Online shopping is his favorite go-to distraction these days: he can lose himself in size charts and color options and hunts for coupon codes and forget, even for a few minutes, that the end of the world is accelerating towards them at an intimidating rate. Plus, he can write off half his shit as work-related expenses. Win-win. Though maybe not this particular search.

Newt has a pretty reliable arsenal of sex toys he’s used on rotation since he packed up and shipped across the world for the PPDC, but the ten-year warranty vibe he’s used since PhD #3 (and his favorite of the bunch) finally crapped out on him last week after a historically intense fight with Hermann got him historically wound up. Eleven years ain’t bad. After testing out a different charger, poking around in the wiring, and even going so far as to zap it a few times with some sorta-stolen drift tech to see if it stirred any life back into it, he finally decided it was time to just mourn, move on, and buy a new one. (Even if, unfortunately, his particular favorite model was discontinued when the company’s factory was destroyed in a kaiju attack and they never quite managed to recover. More casualties of the war.)

The sex toy market is truthfully booming during the apocalypse. It makes sense, Newt guesses—anything for a distraction. Personally, for Newt, orgasms tend to dampen his own existential dread, even if it’s just for a few minutes. He scrolls idly through a few Top Ten For 2023 listicles on various sex magazine websites to see if anything jumps out at him (some of the recommended toys are dildos he already has, and vibes that are a little beyond his k-sci paycheck), just hoping for something to jump out at him. Apparently he missed out on a limited-edition run of jaeger and kaiju-themed vibes and dildos that came out in early January, which he’s honestly a little pissed about—he’s the top expert on kaiju biology, god damn it! Didn’t anyone want to consult with him about their hypothetical junk? Accuracy matters.

“It’s all off,” Newt mutters grumpily as he examines a 360 view of one of the kaiju dildos. Trespasser. “It’s not even the right color. Fucking amateurs. Did they even try?”

“What are you doing?” Hermann says.

Newt slams his laptop shut. Hermann decided to cut his lunch break short today, apparently. “Shopping,” he says.

“You sounded awfully angry about something, is all,” Hermann says. He clacks over to his half of the lab and shrugs off his big parka, then pauses. “Do you need to...talk about it?”

“No,” Newt says.

Hermann breathes out in obvious relief. “Good,” he says.

He takes his usual spot at his chalkboard and resumes his calculating. Newt re-opens his laptop and scrolls away from Trespasser before he can make himself angry over anatomical inaccuracies again. The jaeger vibes from the collection are pretty cool, actually; the designs are a lot cleaner, and their artistic license is a lot more forgivable. The highest-rated of the set is one obviously (but not enough to invoke copyright infringement, if that can even exist for a jaeger) modeled off of Coyote Tango, with like, a million different settings, and an astronomical cost to match. Newt eyes it enviously. He could be shoving that up his ass right now if he’d just signed up for a stupid email list last year.

He follows the link to Amazon to read through some of the reviews enviously, too. Life-changing; best money ever spent; warranty lasts a lifetime. Ten stars across the board. Sold out, obviously. No idea when it’ll be back in stock. He could get the Striker Eureka model for twice the original cost as when it came out, if he wanted, but the idea of constantly having to associate the twenty-something punk Hansen kid with his intimate affairs makes him shudder.

A nine-star review for the Coyote Tango model from someone named MathLover69 is the only one to make Newt really pause, on account of how absolutely insane it is.

I saved quite a few paychecks to purchase this vibrator, and though the cost is steep, I must say it is absolutely worth it. As opposed to my normal vibrator (here another vibe is linked, and Newt’s eyebrows jump at that price, too), which has only five settings, an admittedly bulky body, and average battery life, the CT2023 has a generous ten, a sleeker design, and charges fully in a matter of minutes. The orgasms I have experienced while using it are higher in quality (and more numerous) than any resulting previously from masturbation, though I have not tried beyond setting six yet. It also works wonders for stress relief. (I have an incredibly irritating colleague, and nothing calms me down so much as a quick round with the CT2023 after a spat with him.)

The body is versatile enough to be either inserted into one’s—

Newt feels heat rise to his cheeks in spite of himself, and he skims the second paragraph of MathLover69’s review to get the gist of it—that there are, uh, plenty of ways to utilize the vibe, that it’s discreet and small enough to wear to work (if you were inclined to do so, as MathLover69 implies he might’ve been) and that when combined with the Yamarashi dildo, the pleasurable experience increased tenfold. Talk about oversharing. Jeez.

My only complaint would be that the design is a poor approximation of the real Coyote Tango, and for that I’ve docked a star. I would recommend this product.

“This guy is a total nut,” Newt says to himself.

“Hm?” Hermann says.

Newt considers the implications of showing Hermann the vibrator listing: Hermann will know he was shopping for sex toys, Hermann will know he was shopping for kaiju and jaeger-themed sex toys, Hermann will know he was shopping for kaiju and jaeger-themed sex toys during working hours a mere ten feet away from him. Embarrassing, but on the other hand, MathLover69’s review is too funny to not share with someone else. “Hey, Hermann,” Newt says, angling his laptop towards Hermann. “Look. Who comments shit like this?”

Hermann descends his ladder carefully and inches up behind Newt’s shoulder, squinting at his laptop screen. He immediately turns bright red. Newt must’ve offended his Victorian sensibilities with the mere suggestion of self-abuse. “Oh,” he says. “Er.”

“Way TMI,” Newt says. “Listen to this line. ‘With the Yamarashi toy inserted into one’s mouth, and the CT2023 inserted up one’s—'”

“Well, how else is one meant to review a masturbatory aid?” Hermann snaps, surprising Newt. He looks oddly flustered. “Details can be—er—helpful. Can’t they?”

“Sure, dude,” Newt snorts. “Except they’re obviously just screwing with people. They literally have a 69 in their username.” He taps at the MathLover69, and doesn’t mention—on behalf of Hermann’s delicate mathematician feelings—that the MathLover part is obviously meant as a joke too.

“Well,” Hermann says. “Perhaps it’s just his—er, their birthdate.”

Newt turns around to stare at Hermann, taking in his red cheeks, his red ears, and the gaze he’s fixed steadily on his shoes. It’s all Newt can do to not to gape at him. “Hermann, you’re kidding,” he says. “Right?”

“I don’t know what you mean,” Hermann says.

“You didn’t,” Newt says.

“I,” Hermann stammers. “Well—”

“I didn’t even know you—”

“That I what?” Hermann says.

Newt gives a half-shrug. Hermann doesn’t seem the type to engage in any sort of vice, let alone this kind. And especially not with the type of sex toys he apparently gravitates towards. (If Newt was a little bolder, and had a little less shame and care for hygiene, he might ask to check out the Yamarashi, because anatomical inaccuracies aside, wow that sounds awesome.) “I mean, you know,” Newt says. “You’re kinda you. No offense.”

Hermann takes offense. “I am human,” he says. “I am allowed to masturbate, Newton, and I was merely attempting to educate other customers about the—product—with my thoroughness.” He adds, awkwardly, “My review was voted very helpful, as you can see.”

“Okay,” Newt says with a grin. “I get it. Sorry.”

Hermann marches back over to his side of the lab with a scowl. Newt waits until he’s sure Hermann’s not watching him, and is too distracted by muttering angrily under his breath, to bookmark MathLover69’s page of reviews.

It turns out (as Newt revisits the page later that night, in the privacy of his bunk) Hermann buys and reviews a truly staggering amount of dildos and sex toys, and on top of that, has absolutely zero filter behind the wall of anonymity. It’s to the extent that some of his reviews read like goddamn sexts.

It took me three occasions to successfully work myself up to taking in the entire length…

My orgasm was so pleasurable I alarmed my colleague with the noise I made, who believed me to have injured myself…

The highest vibration setting is a bit of a disappointment…

These are excellent for double penetration…

It also turns out Hermann is a veritable sex fiend. Or at least a masturbation fiend. Judging by his reviews alone, Hermann’s purchased more than a dozen different toys in the past three years alone. That’s four a year. One every three months. That’s not even including buttplugs, which (according to other reviews) he sometimes just wears into the lab (“work”) for the hell of it, which Newt isn’t even going to think about right now. How the hell has Hermann kept this much of his life under wraps? When the hell does he have time to jerk off as much as he apparently does? No wonder they never seem to have any fucking funding; all of Hermann’s paychecks are funneled directly into his—well.

Newt recalls the faux-injury incident Hermann mentioned in a comment with mild embarrassment. No wonder Hermann had been so weird and flushed when he opened his door, and made excuses to say bye to him so quickly—Newt just caught him (oh, boy) immediately following the best orgasm of his life. Well, mild embarrassment, and a little more than mild arousal. What Newt would’ve given to have been there five minutes earlier, to watch Hermann in the act of the best orgasm of his life, to maybe even be the one to cause it…

What Newt would give to use Hermann’s fancy-shmancy vibrator on him, or literally anything from his giant masturbatory arsenal. Or even just watch him use it on himself. Hermann’s just so damned buttoned-up and uptight—it’s all about the contradictions. Juxtapositions. Newt unzips his jeans and sticks his hand down his boxers. “Stupid Hermann,” he moans, as he begins to bring himself off to the image of Hermann with that stupid kaiju dildo down his throat and that stupid jaeger vibe up his ass. Negotiator of peace between the two? Stupid joke, stupid Hermann. Or maybe he’s picturing Hermann showing up to the lab, all plugged up and loose from using a different vibe on himself that morning. Or maybe Hermann pushing two dildos into himself at once. How the hell can he even manage that? Ass his size— “Oh, goddamn it,” Newt moans again, and comes all over his hand.

Whatever. It’s not like Hermann’s ever going to find out about this.

#newmann #maria's fanfiction tag #Anonymous #not sfw ////

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that-crazy-five-foot-two-chick · 3 years

Text

Summary: Winry sat in the optimal place to study in the school cafe for the entire fall semester. Then spring came, and suddenly some self-entitled twit who dressed like off-brand Gerard Way decided it was his territory. He was so not going to get off easy.

Rating: T

Word Count: 1.8k words of coffee shop/college AU with a side of enemies to almost-lovers

A/N: It's finals week, I posted this on Ao3 at almost 5am, and if the rest of the sentence didn't make it obvious, I'm writing from unfortunate experience. Not beta-ed or proofread, although I happened to see one thing to fix when I woke up this morning. Feel my raw power. Rawr.

It wasn't that big a deal.

It kind of really was, though.

Every Thursday morning during the fall semester, Winry sat in the same spot at the same school coffee shop. It was the spot sent by the entire patron pantheon of cram papers. Maybe one person didn't need an entire booth, but it was in the corner, and the tops of the bench seats had opaque plastic barriers that just so happened to be perfect for minimizing excess visual chaos. For the most part, there weren't loud conversations, and the jazz music that came through the speakers helped her tune out people ordering coffee. Add to that the fact that she could use campus flex dollars and not her own bank account that was begging for mercy, and it was the perfect spot to get papers done.

But apparently not this spring.

As soon as Winry walked in, she noticed him in the corner. Some emo wannabe guy on his computer. Probably on Reddit complaining about how women didn't appreciate the amazing pics he sent them on Tinder. Or at least, it was a fair guess based on the sour look on his face. Why did this guy of all people have to steal the holy grail spot? Ugh. She was still gonna get her coffee, darn it.

"You know the deal, Sciezska. Medium roast with a shot of espresso and vanilla creamer."

"On it! You paying in flex?"

"Yeah." She scanned her student ID and lowered her voice. "Who's off-brand Gerard Way in the corner?"

"Who's Ger—"

"The punk kid."

"Ohhh. I can try to get his number for you, if you want."

"No, he looks like a total tool! And not the kind I like dealing with!"

"Which means you think he's hot. I didn't think you were into that type, but you're not wrong."

"For the last time, no, Sciezska! He took my spot! And I'm trying very, very hard to keep this to a stage whisper, but if you keep trying to set me up with some random creep, I won't be able to!"

A distinctly male voice grumbled, "I'm not a creep."

"Keep telling that to the girls on Tinder. I'm sure they'll understand eventually."

"Yeah, and I'll bet if you look at your 'Live, Laugh, Love' sign a little more, you'll understand it eventually." He mumbled something under his breath.

"What was that, Mr. Nice Guy?"

"Lay off, it's eight in the morning. I said the only reason I even have a Tinder account is because my roommate stole my phone while I was going to the bathroom."

"Well, if you didn't want it, why didn't you delete it?"

"Eh, I figured if I really got sick of being single one day, it'd already be there."

"Never would have guessed you were single," Winry said dryly.

"Come on, it's way too early to be rubbing that kind of crap in. Who says I'm not fine with being single anyway?"

Sciezska timidly spoke up. "Medium roast with espresso and vanilla creamer?"

Winry thanked her as red jacket boy continued. "'Edward Elric, Bachelor.' Almost sounds as good as 'Edward Elric, Bachelor of Science.'"

"B.S. degree. Sounds about right."

"About time you stopped acting like I'm an idiot!"

Winry snorted. "That's not what I meant."

"Hey!"

"And with that, I'm going to go find some other spot to write my paper."

Edward, as his name apparently was, scoffed and mumbled something that sounded like "good riddance". Maybe the librarians wouldn't get on her case too much for bringing in coffee.

-----

A week later, Winry walked into the cafe, assuming the circumstances of the previous week were an anomaly. They were not.

"Medium roast with a shot of espresso and vanilla creamer," she grumbled and sulked in the direction of the corner seat.

"Hey, don't start with me again, blondie. I've had a whopping four hours of sleep and I can't promise you'll like what comes out of my mouth."

"We're at a coffee shop. Get some coffee. I can't help it if you're too hung over to be polite."

"Now look, genius. I did not stay up until 4 A.M. working on a stupid chem paper for that sadistic pyromaniac excuse for a professor just for some random chick to accuse me of being hung over."

"Oh."

"Yeah. And for your information, coffee doesn't really help me wake up. It just helps me focus on homework." He lifted up his empty cup and gave it a shake.

"That's the weirdest thing I've ever heard."

"ADHD is a weird thing, and yet, here I am."

"Huh, interesting."

"Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to pick up where I left off with the same stupid ten page paper I started last night."

"Oh right. Sure," Winry stammered. "Listen, I'm really sorry I just assumed things about you. It was wrong of me, and I'd like to make it up to you, if that's okay."

Edward eyed her suspiciously. "What do you have in mind?"

"Well...I could look over your paper once you're done writing it? I've got a paper of my own to write while I'm waiting, and I can sit right across the table here so you don't have to come get me. I won't try to talk to you or anything. Neither of us need that kind of distraction."

"Alright, alright. Get your coffee and sit down. The girl at the counter's been up there waiting for a good minute or two while you've been at confessional over here."

"Wait, she has?" Winry's eyes widened, and Edward laughed at her expense. He was kind of attractive when he wasn't scowling...wait what? She pouted and got up to retrieve her coffee. When Winry returned, she plopped down on the bench opposite Edward and opened her laptop. Peeking out from behind it, she added, "By the way, I'm Winry. I figured you ought to at least know the name of the person who's proofreading your paper."

"Well, Winry, you're the one who volunteered." The corners of his mouth twitched upward. The two worked on their assignments in silence, occasionally speaking up when necessary.

-----

Edward was in the corner again the next week as well.

"Hey, Edward! Mind if I join you for homework again?"

"Normally, I'd say no, but you didn't bother me too much last week, so you might as well." He turned away slightly.

"Great! Have you gotten your coffee yet? I didn't see a cup, and you got something the last two times."

"Eh, I haven't been here long. If you're going up and getting yours, would you mind ordering a caramel macchiato for me?" He asked, sliding his ID across the table.

"Yeah, no problem. I'll be back in a sec."

She returned and slipped his ID back before pulling out her computer. "Do you have anything for me to look over this time?"

"Not this week. But if you have anything you need looked over, I can do that, too."

"Actually, I do, if you wouldn't mind."

"Winry, I just volunteered. Just send the paper to my school email. Mine's 'elricedwa'," he instructed as he proceeded to spell it.

"Medium roast and a caramel macchiato?" Sciezska called out.

"Coming!" Winry replied and turned to Edward. "I just sent it, so you should be able to start while I'm getting our stuff." Eyes glued to his laptop, Edward gave a thumbs up.

Once she returned with their drinks, Winry sat down and wordlessly set Edward's drink next to him.

"Thanks," he muttered distantly. His lips mirrored the words he was reading. Though his lips weren't plump by any stretch of the imagination, they were shapely. His steely concentration made the air leave Winry's lungs. To top it all off, the first rays of sunlight came through the window just right, hitting Edward's hair in a way that made it positively glow.

What was she thinking? Those were only the sorts of things people thought when they had a crush. She'd only had two positive interactions with him, including this one. ...well, maybe it was a crush. She could certainly do worse than someone with a questionable fashion sense. After all, he worked hard, and he got good grades, if the quality of his writing was any indication. Okay, fine. He was also drop dead gorgeous, if you could see past his clothing choices. Yeah, she had a crush.

"Did you hear anything I just said?"

"...no."

"Figures. I finished reading your paper. It's not bad, I just left a few suggestions for sentence structure. Now I am going to enjoy my caramel macchiato." He took off the lid and breathed in the steam with his eyes closed, nearly drooping into the cup in content. When he opened his eyes slowly, Winry was awestruck by the similarity between the color of his eyes and his drink.

"What?" Edward furrowed his eyebrows.

"Nothing. I didn't say anything. At all. Nope."

"Okay." He shrugged. She reopened the document and went through his suggested edits. Gnawing her lip in concentration, she leaned forward a bit to settle in and tackle the editing.

"...hey, uh, Winry?" Edward gulped. "Are you going to drink your coffee?"

"Oh! Yeah, I almost forgot. Thanks, Edward!" she smiled.

"No–no problem. And you can call me Ed, you know. Most people do. Except for that excuse for a professor that calls me pipsqueak. Can you believe he's my advisor? I mean, come on, I'm a grown man. I'm not that short."

Winry made a poor attempt at containing her laughter. "Okay then, Ed. Prove it. Stand up."

"Fine." He slid out of the booth and stood. Winry followed suit and appraised their respective heights.

"Well, I'd hardly call you tall, but you're at least taller than me by a few inches, for whatever that's worth."

Edward grinned as if he had won some sort of prize. "Time for shorties to sit down now!"

"Watch it now. You're not too far from that label yourself, mister."

They both returned to their positions in the booth and worked steadily for the next hour. At the end of that time, Winry closed her laptop. "Ed, are you okay? You seem distracted."

"ADHD. I'm always distracted," he dismissed.

"No, like, are you sick or something? You did get more than four hours of sleep this time, right?"

"No comment." Ed's mouth twitched. He mumbled barely loud enough to hear, "Wouldn't have mattered anyway."

"Are you sure? If you're not feeling well, I can drive you over to the health center."

"N-no. That's not it." He exhaled, then slid a napkin across the table. His hands trembled slightly. "Anyway, here's my number. In case you need me to look over a paper. Or whatever. I've got a class soon."

Winry blushed, but tucked the napkin in her laptop. "Thanks, Ed. See you next week?"

"Yeah. Next week."

-----

Winry: This goes with your major, right?

Edward: Blocked

#fma #fma fanfic #503 day #when i wrote it it was probably still 503 day somewhere #edwin #edward elric #winry rockbell #fma sciezska #fma sheska #my writing #my fic #coffee shop au #college au

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gubes-sweaters · 3 years

Text

Mind, Body, and Soul 5

Authors note: Hey, so it's been a while oops. I’ve been writing one-shots in between writing chapters 4 and 5 only because I wasn’t sure where to take this series, but I’ve figured it out and now I’m back. I still have 3 or 4 one-shots written that still need to be edited. This chapter has a couple of switches of the POV. Sorry if it’s a little confusing, but it’s the easiest way to write the story. Also, I know Gideon and Rossi didn’t work together in the early season, but I’m changing it. I realize the TL of a lot of the members is off, but it’s all intentional for the story.

Content warning: Nothing I can think of, but don’t be afraid to tell me about a warning I should put in.

Word count: 2.7k

Chapter 5: New Member of the BAU

*ring ring*

I shift under Spencer's grip trying to reach my phone as it's ringing. He’s such a heavy sleeper that by the time I wiggled out from his arms and grabbed my phone he was still sleeping. He just rolled over before snoring very quietly. I look at my phone and see it's my dad! Shit, I was supposed to meet with my dad at ten today and it's already eleven. I'm not even ready this is such a disaster, what am I supposed to tell him? Oh, don’t worry dad I’m just busy because I’m in the back of this guy’s car and I slept through my alarm! He’s going to kill me because I'm supposed to meet some of my dad’s work friends then go out to lunch with him.

“Ciao papà,” I say trying to sound like I'm awake. He can probably see through my bullshit though because I'm a shitty liar, and he's a profiler.

“Where's my bambino and why isn't she at the BAU right now? My colleagues want to meet you.”

“Sorry, I spent all night studying and I must've slept through my alarm I'll be there as soon as possible,” I technically lie to him I did sleep through my alarm.

“Okay...well, I love you. I have a security badge ready for you. All you have to do is tell security who you are and you're here to see me,” He's clearly not convinced but I don't think he cares enough to press the issue.

“Okay, love you too. Bye!” I hang up then turn to Spencer trying to wake him up.

I shake him over and over until he finally stirs. Seriously how the hell does he sleep so heavy. Once I get him up I explain that I’m supposed to have lunch with my dad and I’m supposed to meet his coworkers now that he’s coming out of retirement for whatever reason.

“Okay, yeah give me a second to clean up the back, and we can take you back to your apartment,” He says while rubbing the sleep out of his eyes.

“Thanks,” I say before planting a gentle kiss on his cheek.

He blushes at me before signaling for me to hop out of the trunk. We make a collaborative effort to clean out the trunk and sit the back seats back up. We then get in the front and make small talk on the way back to my apartment. Once we arrive I feel that pit in my stomach again, the same one I feel every time one of us has to leave.

“Thanks for yesterday!” I say before turning to open the car door with the bear we made yesterday. When I asked who's keeping the bear he jokingly said we’ll split custody and I guess this is my week. Before I could open the car door he placed his hand on my forearm very gently like I was made out of glass. He has this pained and disappointed look on his face.

“Can I see you again?” He asks just barely above a whisper.

I just respond with a nod and a quick kiss before I hop out of the car and wave goodbye. All I see is a wide grin on his face and a wave before I disappear into my apartment building. I knew Stella and Raven weren’t home because neither of their cars was in the parking lot. That meant I could get ready quickly and slip out of the apartment without any questions being asked.

I set the stuffed bear on the bed and begin getting ready. After I shower, dry my hair, brush my teeth, apply a small bit of makeup, and slip on a sweater and jeans I’m finally ready to leave. It’s only one pm, so I'm not making a horrible time given that I was already late. I then practically drive like a mad man to the BAU. I stop at security and tell them I’m here for my dad David Rossi. I get directions to the floor and where my dad’s new office is. I walk into the bullpen and see two very familiar and comforting faces, but the others belong to complete strangers. I immediately spot my dad’s old partner Jason Gideon and the Unit Chief Aaron Hotchner. I met them both when I was in middle school, but the rest of the team was new to me and my dad as well. He’s been there for a couple of months since his book tour was just now ending. As soon as Gideon sees me he walks towards me with his arms outstretched.

“Hey kiddo it’s been a long time. I may be getting old, but I’ll never forget that face.” He says while engulfing me in a hug. Honestly, I talked to Gideon probably more than my dad growing up. This is odd because he didn’t have the best relationship with his own son, but he was always like a cool uncle. Then the same click happened to me and Aaron Hotchner when we first met. He always wanted kids and some of the only times you would see him smile and laugh was around kids. He and his wife Haley jokingly called me their test run when I would spend time with them. When my mom and dad were both busy I spent a lot of time with Haley because I didn’t want to be with a nanny.

“Hey, guys!” I say before hugging them both once more.

“So, how’s school been? You’re not getting into any trouble are you?” Uncle Jason asks before nudging me as the three of us walk towards my dad’s new office. I can see two people’s eyes on me from the bullpen then suddenly a third when a blonde woman who doesn't look much older than me comes strutting out of her office flashing me a quick smile.

“You know me, I’m David Rossi’s daughter, so I seemingly can't stay out of trouble,” I joked with them as we arrived at my dad’s new office. It had a shiny new nameplate that said “David Rossi” on the front of it. Gideon knocks and I feel a wave of nostalgia. I remember in the 6th grade visiting my dad at the BAU and walking up to my dad’s office hand in hand with Gideon. Now I’m much older and much taller, but much hasn’t changed. After a few seconds, my dad opens the door with a huge grin on his face I swear he hasn't changed since I was a kid. He still wears overly expensive suits and a watch that probably would pay a year and a half of my rent if not more.

“Ah, there she is. Oh, how I’ve missed you,” He says before eloping me in a bear hug.

“Come I want you to meet my other co-workers,” He says as the four of us walk back down the stairs where a small conglomeration of desks are.

“Everybody this is my daughter (y/n),” My dad proudly says while the three people went to introduce themselves. The first being the woman walking out of the office earlier. She is tall and blonde. She looks a little young to be a profiler though.

“Hi, I’m Jenifer Jareau, but you’re more than welcome to call me JJ. I’m the communication's liaison,” She says as she sticks her hand out for me to shake. After a woman with dark brown hair and dark brown eyes also extended her hand out to me. She was wearing a tan leather jacket with a black top beneath it and black dress pants along with tan ankle boots.

“Hi I’m Elle Greenway, it’s nice to meet you these three have been talking about you all day,” She says while gesturing towards my dad, uncle Aaron, and uncle Jason. Lastly, a tall very muscular man walks up to me with an awful lot of confidence. He’s wearing a tight heather gray t-shirt and a pair of jeans. Accompanied by his gun sitting snugly on his hip.

“Well Hello I’m Derek Morgan and you must be an angel,” He says forgetting that my dad is standing right behind me either that or he doesn't care. I shake his hand before my dad clears his throat not amused by Morgan's antics.

“Well, now that you’ve met my team it’s about time we went to lunch. Aaron don’t hesitate to call me if something pops up about that DC hacker case,” He says as we walk away and Uncle Aaron just responds with his usual very stern-looking face and a slight nod.

“DC hacker?” I ask as we exit the bullpen and make our way to the elevator.

“Let’s not talk about work. I want to know about school how are you?”

“I’m doing good I guess I've been a little distracted as of recent but I'm keeping myself on track I promise.”

“Atta girl,” He says before the elevator doors open, and he leads me out to his car.

-----Time Skip----

“So how are Raven and Stella I haven't seen them since I went to sign the lease again last year.” I can tell what he’s doing he’s making awkward small talk, so he feels like he's an integral part of my life. I appreciate the effort and I can’t shit on him too much because at least he’s making an effort. So I’ll play into this and make him feel better for the time being. I’m hoping that he doesn't feel like utter crap because we have nothing important to talk about besides this DC hacker case that I can’t get out of my mind. I haven’t talked about it since we were in the car because he clearly doesn’t want me to know anything about it since he keeps dodging my questions.

“They’re doing pretty good. I mean we don’t have any classes together this year because our majors are somewhat different, but we live together, so we're still close.”

“Oh, how's that friend you were telling me about? Penelope Garcia, that's her name right?” He asks as he leans in close to me. If I didn't know any better I would think he's shamelessly profiling me right now. We continue to talk about school and my friends throughout lunch. For someone who has such an extra and boujee person, he didn't talk about himself at all. Which is not my dad's usual behavior at all.

“Well, that's good to hear. So I was thinking after lunch maybe we-” As if God himself answered my prayers my dad's work cell starting ringing. I can hear small mumbles from the blonde woman I met earlier I believe her name was JJ. I can't exactly make out what is going on but either way, I'm taking whatever excuse I can get.

“I’m sorry sweetheart I’m going to have to cut this short that was a call from work. On the bright side, I’m not going to be on my book tour anymore, so whenever I have a day off we can spend time together.”

“Of course!” I say trying to humor him.

“Well, I’ll drop you back off at the FBI building.” He says before flagging down the waitress to pay for the check.

----Rossi’s POV----

I walk back into the FBI building after dropping (y/n) off. Aaron, Gideon, and I feel terrible for using her to get information. I feel the worst out of the three of us because I promised her after going back to the BAU this time would be different, but she's currently just another pawn in a game she didn't agree to.

“So what do we have Aaron?”

“Follow me to the round table we got all of the information needed from another technical analyst in the building Kevin Lynch.”

As Aaron and I walk into the room JJ is giving Gideon, Morgan, and Emily all of the information we need to know.

“This is Penelope Grace Garcia. She is a 28-year-old female. We didn’t have many people to contact for information on her because her birth parents are no longer alive. Her parents passed in a car accident ten years ago that was caused by a drunk driver. Since then she has seemingly lived a low profile life and has managed to stay under the radar when it comes to the justice system. We have been able to get enough evidence on her because of her close relations with David Rossi's daughter (y/n) Rossi. We are going to bring her in for questioning. She’ll likely have no prior knowledge of interrogations because she’s been able to fly under the radar. That also makes her extremely cocky, and she’ll think that we have no information on her. Our job is to be as docile yet forward as possible. We want to be docile, so she’ll trust. She has so much skill that Strauss approved for us to recruit her into the BAU. She’ll be of more use to us than she would be in jail. That’s all for now.”

As JJ finishes with the profile we all gather our things and mentally prepare ourselves for the interrogation. I was advised to stay out of it just in case she knew I was (y/n)’s father. Given the fact that she’s an elite hacker that isn’t such a farfetched statement.

-Hotch’s POV-

“You have two options either you can serve jail time or you can work for us at the BAU,” I tell her just before Morgan walks back into the room.

I have her make a quick resume, so we can hire her onto the BAU. I think she has potential and that she’s just putting up a tough front. I have to give her props though because I’ve seen grown men crumble a lot easier than her. Once we’re able to strike a deal with her I have Morgan unlock her cuffs. I make sure Morgan knows to tell her that she can’t talk about any of this with (y/n) for a while especially since the case involving her isn’t fully closed.

-(y/n) POV-

I finally make it back to my apartment when I get a text from my mom asking how lunch with my dad went. As I unlock the door to my apartment I text her back and let her know that it was okay, but dad was acting super weird. I told her it seemed like he was interrogating me. She just let me know that it’s out of habit because he’s a profiler and it’s not that big of a deal and to not read too much into it.

I feel like there was something that I had to do but I can't remember. It’s not until I check the calendar on my phone and realize Daisy’s birthday is in two days and I didn’t get her anything. I’m far too lazy to leave my apartment for a second time today which was supposed to be my day off. I also don’t want to go alone maybe I should text Spencer and see how busy he is.

Me: Hey, I have a birthday party to go to on Saturday. I still need to get her a birthday present would you mind coming with me tomorrow?

Spence: Sure, what time should I pick you up?

Me: How about 10?

Spence: Sounds good I’ll see you then :)

Taglist: @haylaansmi @rexorangecouny

#spencer reid #spencer reid fanfiction #criminal minds fanfiction #criminal minds imagine #spencer reid smut #spencer reid au #spencer reid x y/n #criminal minds smut #plug spencer #spencer reid fanfic #plug!spencer fanfiction #plug!spencer #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid angst

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duhragonball · 3 years

Text

‘21

Amidst all the popular hype for seeing the end of 2020, it didn’t hit me until about lunchtime what the real highlight is that I’ve been waiting for: For the first time since 1999, the year finally ends in “numberty-number” again. It low-key irritated me that we had to call it “two thousand three” and I was relieved when “twenty-thirteen” caught on, but it still wasn’t right because it was too short, and now we’re back in the sweet spot, and I should be safely dead by 2100, so that’s one less thing I gotta deal with.

Really, even “numberty hundred” rings true to me. “Nineteen hundred” sounds like a year. “Twenty-one-oh-six” sounds like a futur-y year, which is even cooler. So did “Two thousand five”, until I was actually living in it, and it sounds even worse now that it was a long time ago and adults will talk about their childhood happening in that year. Daniel Witwicky would be old enough to get married and grow a fancier beard than me. That’s nuts. My point is that, honestly, it’s the year 3000-3019 that I have to worry about, so if I ever decide to go vampire, those will be the years I hide in the ocean or force society to reset the calendar, whichever’s easier.

I spent New Year’s Eve finishing Superliminal, which I bought on Steam after I watched Vegeta play it on YouTube. It has a similar look and feel to the Stanley Parable, so if you liked one you’d probably enjoy the other, although Superliminal has a different theme. I kept hoping I’d find some secret passage that I wasn’t supposed to take, and a narrator would scold me for finding the “Chickenbutt Ending”, but it doesn’t work that way. Superliminal’s all about puzzles and awesome visuals, but it does have the same soothing design aesthetics as TSP. Honestly, I enjoyed just wandering around in Stanley’s office, and Superliminal does the same thing with a hotel and several other settings. It’s nice.

This got me thinking about how I kind of did everything there was to do in The Stanley Parable, and I sort of wished they would add new stuff to the game, but I’m not sure there would be much point to that. I could play the older version, but it presents the same message, just with different assets. The Boss’s Office would look different, but it’d be the same game. And this got me thinking about various “secret chapters” in pop culture. Secrets behind the cut.

I first heard about this idea in the 2000′s, when fans invented this notion that there was a secret chapter of Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. I read a website that tried to explain the concept, and of course it lauded J.K. Rowling with all this gushing praise for working an Easter egg into the book, a literary work of “well, magic.”

That pretty well sums up my distaste for Harry Potter, by the way. These days, JKR has thoroughly crapped all over her reputation and legacy, but in the 2000′s it felt like half the planet was in a mad rush to canonize her as a writing goddess, to the point where fans were congratulating her for writing secret chapters that didn’t actually exist. The idea was based on lore from the books about Neville Longbottom’s parents. They were patients in a mental hospital, and he’d go to visit them, and they would give him bubble gum wrappers, intended to demonstrate how far remove they’ve become from reality. The secret chapter lies in those wrappers, which all read “Droobles Best Blowing Gum” or some such. What if Neville’s parents were only pretending to be mentally ill, so as to throw off their enemies? Naturally, they would want to stay in contact with their son, so the bubble gum wrappers would have to contain coded messages. Said code involves unscrambling the letters on the wrappers to make new words, like “goblin” or “sword” or “Muggle” or “Dumbledore”. The problem is that you can also use it to make other words like “booger” or “drool” or “booobbiess.” Play with it enough, and you can make the code say anything you want it to say, which means it’s no code at all.

But the idea was that the not-yet-published sixth HP book would reveal all of this gum wrapper nonsense, and Neville would decode the messages and discover all of his parents’ super-cool adventures. I’m not sure why we needed a secret chapter if Book 6 was going to explain all of this anyway in several not-secret chapters, but that was the whole point. Fans didn’t have Book 6 yet, and they were so desperate to read it that they started trying to extrapolate what would happen next based on “clues” from the previous five. That’s like trying to figure out what Majin Buu looks like by watching the Androids Saga. I guess some wiseguy would have guessed that he’d resemble #19, but that’d just be blind luck.

And when you get down to it, this whole secret chapter business is really just a conspiracy. This is literally how Qanon works. Some anonymous jackass posted vague “hints” on an imageboard, and people went goofy trying to interpret them and figure out what would happen in the future. They call it “research” because they spend a ton of time on this, but there’s no basis to any of it. It took me a few minutes to figure out that you can spell “Muggle” with the words in “Drooble’s Best Blowing Gum”, but that’s not research and it doesn’t prove anything. But all these guys keep looking for “Hilary Clinton goes to jail next week” and lo and behold that’s all they ever find.

In the same vein, the gum wrapper thing was really a complaint disguised as a conspiracy, disguised as a “magical secret chapter”. At least a few fans wanted to see more Neville in their Harry Potter books, they wanted Neville’s parents, or someone like them, to have cool spy adventures or whatever else. The point is, they clearly weren’t getting what they wanted out of the printed works, but they didn’t want to turn against their Dear Beloved Author, so they started casting about for an alternative reality, one where J.K. Rowling wrote a cooler story and hid it in the pages of the one that actually went to press. So instead of just saying “Hey, Order of the Phoenix was kind of a letdown, I hope there’s more ninjas in the next book,” they said “Rowling is a genius because I wanted ninjas and she’s definitely going to give them to me, I have the gum wrappers to prove it.”

The same thing happened all over again when the BBC Sherlock show took a turn for the nonsensical. I don’t know from BBC Sherlock, but I watched the fascinating video critique by Hbomberguy, and it sounds like the show did tons of plot twists until it stopped making sense altogether in the fourth season. If you skip to 1:09:00 in the video, you’ll hear about fan theories that suggested that season four was supposed to be crappy, as part of a secret meta-narrative plan that would be paid off in a secret, unannounced episode that would not only explain everything, but retroactively justify the crappy episodes that came before. But it’s been a few years and it never came to pass, so I think we can call this myth busted.

Most recently, I think we’ve all seen a lot of talk about the final season of Supernatural, where I guess Destiel sort of became canon but only one guy does the love confession and the other doesn’t respond. But I guess he does say “I love you too” in the Spanish dub, which means the English language version was edited for whatever reason. It’s not exactly a secret episode, but the implication is that there’s more to this than what made it to the screen. So the questions turn to what the screenplay said, what the writers and actors wanted to do, etc. etc. My general impression is that SPN fans are a bit more used to crushing disappointment, so they’re not quite as delusional about this show being unquestionable genius, like Sherlock and Harry Potter. Maybe this is an Anglophile thing? Like, if you suck at something with a British accent, people will accept it more unconditionally?

I had seen something on Twitter about how there should have been a secret Seinfeld episode in the 90′s. Someone suggested it at the time, they tape a whole episode, then wait until 2020 to air it, because by then it would be worth a fortune. But they didn’t do it, because it costs a lot of money to make a TV episode, and if you don’t air the show right away, you aren’t making that money back any time soon. Yeah, you might recoup a fortune someday, but Seinfeld was making a ton of money then. It exposes the fannish nature of the idea. A fan would love to discover a cool secret chapter, but a content creator isn’t necessarily keen on making a cool thing and then hiding it where few people would find it.

I thought about doing this myself recently. Maybe Supernatural gave me the bug, but I thought “I’m writing this big-ass story, so what if I wrote me a secret chapter for it? Wouldn’t that be cool?” But no, it wouldn’t be cool, because it’d be the same work as writing a regular chapter, and the same stress I feel when I hold off on publishing it. Except I’d just never publish it, I’d put it in some secret hole on the internet and hope that some superfan who might not even exist can decode whatever clues I leave.

I mean, it’d be awesome if it got discovered and everyone loved it. “Hey, I found this hidden chapter! Mike’s done it again!” And I could bask in the glory. But what if no one finds it? Then I just wasted my time, right? I want people to read my work. My monkey brain needs the sweet, sweet validation of those kudos and comments, folks. Once I realized that, I understood why no one else would want to do a secret chapter either. Easter eggs are one thing, but the bigger bonus features they put on DVDs were pretty easy to find, and with good reason.

I think that’s what made the Stanley Parable so appealing to play, because it teases you with the idea that you can “break” the game and find some extra content that you weren’t supposed to see, but as you go exploring all those hidden areas, it gradually becomes clear that this is just part of the game; you were meant to find all these things, and that’s why they were put here. It’s hidden, but he secret aspect of it is just pretend.

I suppose that what I like about games like TSP and Superliminal is the illusion of secrets more than the secrets themselves. I like roaming through the hallways, having no idea what I might find ahead. I kind of wish I could open all the doors, and not just the ones the game designers put stuff behind, but the reality is that there’s nothing on the other side. I used a cheat code once to explore the unused doors in TSP and it’s just a bright white field on the other side. Interesting to look at, but not much of a reveal. Honestly, the doors themselves are more appealing than anything that could lay behind them.

And that’s probably what makes secrets so fun. They could be almost anything, but once you open the present, the number of possibilities drops to one. If they had ever made that Secret BBC Sherlock Episode, I doubt it would have lived up to expectations, but fans could amuse themselves by imagining what could have been in it. In the end, though, things usually don’t justify the hype. For every Undertaker debut at Survivor Series 1990, there’s a Gobbledygooker debut at Survivor Series 1990. It’s impossible to manufacture a secret with a guaranteed payoff.

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wheresmynaya · 4 years

Text

Two Ghosts Ch. 27 | Brittana

I must’ve been in a Soft!Riz mood when writing this so enjoy that.

Also available on ff.net (x) ao3 (x) & below the cut!

Everyone – mainly Quinn – said she wouldn’t last a day, but here she is a whole week later still going strong! Well technically, she’s starting to slowly lose her mind but with all things considered, she thinks lasting this long without spontaneously booking a flight to San Francisco is actually pretty good! She has done well by keeping her mind busy and revisiting some old hobbies.

Surprisingly, one of those hobbies involves the old piano she inherited from her Abuelo that’s been left untouched for months now. She kept it and the record player he left to her here at Maribel’s until she was ready to settle down somewhere permanent and move them properly but she hasn’t felt like settling down anywhere yet. It felt weird to do it alone, but things are changing now that she has found Brittany again.

It’s a surprise she even remembers how to play the thing, but there’s something about it that makes her feel a little closer to her Abuelo. Maybe it’s the holiday season and Brittany’s absence and the loneliness settling in, but Santana finds herself reminiscing a lot lately.

As a little girl, she use to sit on this very bench next to her Abuelo and watch him play. Always so captivated by him and the way his fingers danced along the keys so effortlessly, Santana would watch with a child-like curiosity and try to mimic his movements. He would smile proudly and encourage her to sing along, even when she didn’t know how to control her voice just yet.

They were quite the pair and sometimes Santana thinks that maybe she got her musical genes from him too. He cultivated her passion for music without even trying. When he introduced her to the glorious sounds of Fleetwood Mac, it was like an awakening. She loved her Abuelo dearly; he would always be first in line to congratulate her after a performance, a giant bouquet of flowers in hand and a proud smile on his face.

Santana finds herself wishing her Abuela could look at her like that again before she shoves the thought away. She doesn’t want to think about her, about someone so quick to judge. Her Abuelo only met Brittany in passing once the night Santana performed Valerie, but Santana’s convinced he would’ve loved her if there was more time to get to know her.

He would’ve loved that Santana was loved by Brittany too.

It’s that thought that causes a tear to roll down her cheek. With everything that happened with her Abuela and her dad, Santana just wishes her Abuelo was still around. She just needs one other person from her family to be happy for her and what she has found in Brittany, because that’s what family is supposed to do. They’re supposed to love you and celebrate with you and when she marries Brittany one day, she doesn’t want Maribel to sit alone at the Lopez table.

If her Abuelo was still around, he would make sure Maribel wasn’t alone. Santana is certain of that.

She misses him and a part of her will always regret not visiting more before his health started to turn. She regrets not talking to him about her feelings for Brittany before –

Santana wipes away another tear and continues to play. She can almost hear his voice telling her how beautiful she sounds and that she should play for him more often.

She thinks now is the perfect time to do just that.

It’s a couple hours later and Santana has maxed out on watching reality tv. She has now ventured into the Hallmark movie territory which is nothing but straight people doing holiday things and all the sappy, cheesy love stories that have been set to Christmas music play on all of Santana’s feelings.

Like if she wasn’t a little emotional before, she is now. But like, don’t tell anyone.

She just really misses Brittany, okay? They’ve done a pretty good job of keeping in touch through phone calls and texts and the occasional video chat, but Santana has been trying to limit how often they talk. She doesn’t want to intrude on the time Brittany is meant to be spending with her family, but it gets hard sometimes. Especially when she keeps subjecting herself to watching hetero couples fall in love over and over again.

Honestly, it’s so cringe-worthy but she can’t take her eyes off of the screen. Though, she’s certain of one thing: her and Brittany’s love story is so much better than the crap Hallmark churns out!

Santana’s already camped out on the couch with a cozy blanket and she’s having an entire carton of coffee ice cream for lunch while she watches re-runs of Chopped: The Holiday Edition. She’s really into it to be honest – it’s way better than A Christmas Prince – and even starts shouting at the tv when a chef forgets to include a basket ingredient.

“See? Didn’t I say?” Santana shakes her head after another spoonful of ice cream. She listens as Alex Guarnaschelli points out a contestant’s technical error then starts to nod along with her, “Exactly, Alex, I completely agree with you. Marcus is such a dumbass for that.”

Another ten minutes go by and it’s time for tasting. Santana eagerly awaits the judge’s criticism, it’s her favorite part of the whole show. Sometimes she thinks she could do this one day for a living – she wasn’t gifted with impeccable wit for nothing – but she’s sure she’d probably get fired pretty quickly for making a contestant cry.

Aarón Sánchez starts to complain about lack of spice and Santana shakes her head disappointedly, “You should’ve used the gingerbread in the stuffing like I told you. Maybe it would’ve helped out your bland ass dish! Pathetic. Where did you even go to culinary school?”

“Like you even cook,” Quinn smirks which causes Santana to nearly jump out of her blanket burrito.

“What the fuck, Q? How’d you get in here?” Santana gasps at the sight of Quinn dressed in her soft grey peacoat standing near the front door.

“The door was wide open?” Quinn quirked her brow as she untied her scarf, “I literally said ‘Hey Santana!’ did you really not hear me?”

Santana tried to backtrack but ended up shaking her head, “Does it look like I heard you? Jesus…can’t just roll up on a girl during a Chopped marathon. Have you no respect?”

“A what marathon?” Quinn glances at the tv then to Santana’s set up on the couch and frowns, “Uh…when’s the last time you’ve left the house?”

Santana ponders, “How long has it been since Britt’s left?”

“Oh my God...” Quinn laughs, “Seriously?”

Santana rolls her eyes, “No. I went out to get this ice cream.”

Quinn shakes her head as she rounds the couch to swipe the remote off the coffee table and turns off the tv.

“Excuse me, I was watching that!” Santana huffs, “I needz to know if Cecile makes it to the next round, she’s the underdog!”

“Get up, we’re going out.” Quinn says with no room for argument, but Santana tries anyway.

“I don’t feel like going out, hence the pjs and ice cream.”

“Right,” Quinn smirks, “And this is why Brittany wanted me to check up on you.”

Santana rounds on her, “She did not.”

“She totally did,” Quinn assures her, “So go get dressed, we’re going out. I know just what you need.”

Santana snorted, “I highly doubt that.”

Quinn rolled her eyes and ripped the blankets from Santana, “Move it, Lopez. I don’t have all day.”

Santana let out a heavy sigh and thrust her carton of ice cream into Quinn’s hands before stomping up the stairs to her room. Through the echo of the staircase, Santana yelled out, “You suck!”

“Drama Queen!” Quinn smirked then she stole a spoonful of ice cream.

“I’m…oddly impressed,” Santana comments as she and Quinn sit on a bench in front of Old Navy with their lattes in hand. They had been people-watching for awhile now, alternating with what shops they wanted to observe.

It was Christmas Eve in Lima and people were stressed the fuck out.

It was great.

“Yeah, I thought you’d like this,” Quinn says before taking a sip, “You love watching people suffer.”

“In theory,” Santana grins. They had seen about three instances now where a fight nearly broke out over something ridiculous like a scarf or the last cable knit sweater that was on sale. Santana was loving every minute of it but she didn’t want the compliment to boost Quinn’s ego.

“Uh-oh, check that one out,” Quinn nods over to another argument breaking out.

“This is awesome,” Santana smirks, “I wouldn’t fight over anything Old Navy has to offer, but if it were like Gucci or Prada then I could understand. I’d cut a bitch for some Burberry.”

“Of course you would,” Quinn chuckles and they knock their coffee cups together in one swift motion. They sit there captivated by all the action for a moment longer before Quinn turns to Santana, “So how are you holding up while Britt’s away?”

Santana’s smile falters slightly before she shrugs, “It’s hard and it brings back some shitty memories of when we did long distance once, but I’m okay. We’re okay. We talk often so it’s fine.”

“That’s good. She’ll be back soon enough.”

“Yeah, it’s only temporary,” Santana agrees, “I don’t want to make it about me. I know she has missed being near her family so I’m just keeping busy.”

Quinn just nods and they go back to watching the drama unfold before them.

It totally beats sitting on the couch and watching it through a tv screen, that’s for sure! And although Brittany can’t be here for this, Quinn isn’t so bad to be around. In fact, it’s kind of nice to hang out with her. Maribel’s been so busy with work lately, Santana’s had to spend a lot of time alone and we’ve seen what happens when she’s left alone with her thoughts for too long.

“Oh look who it is!” Quinn jabs her pointy elbow into Santana’s bicep.

“Ow! Watch where you shove that thing,” Santana grumbles and looks to the direction of where Quinn’s pointing. Her eyes widen at a familiar face and watch as the blonde makes his way over to the pretzel stand. Santana almost forgot how much of a small town Lima was and how it’s almost impossible to go out anywhere without running into someone you know.

“Is this weird? Do you want to leave?” Quinn asks when Santana doesn’t say anything more.

She shakes her head, “No, it’s okay. He’s Britt’s best friend.”

Just as she said that, another familiar face joins his side and her jaw drops.

“Is that,” Quinn gasps and she’s on her feet before she’s finished her sentence.

Santana scrambles after, also happily surprised by the other Glee Club alumni.

“Mercedes!” Quinn squeals and it makes her and Sam jump at the sound, but soon their faces fill with delight as they see who it is.

“Quinn! Hey girl!” Mercedes beams and pulls her into a tight hug, “Is that Satan with you too?”

Santana smirks, “Hey ‘Cedes.” And then she’s pulled into a bone-crushing hug along with Quinn. It’s nice, she secretly kind of likes hugs like these.

“Hey guys,” Sam chuckles as he holds a pretzel in each hand, “I’d get in on that group hug too but…pretzels.”

For some reason that makes Santana laugh and she’s reminded of a time before everything happened where she actually didn’t mind Sam too much. Afterall, they sort of dated once but it was purely to hide the fact that she was brokenhearted. He was a dork and a nerd but he was alright in her book for the most part. She also remembers the time he and Quinn dated and it makes her smirk, to think she was the reason they broke up in the first place. Yikes!

They’re all just funny memories now though.

“Hey Sam,” Santana greets as Mercedes finally pulls away.

“Sorry! Hi Sam,” Quinn waves too before looking to them both, “What are you guys doing here? Last minute shopping?”

“Yeah,” Mercedes’ rolls her eyes, “Someone didn’t get his own mother a gift yet so we’ve had to brave the crowds which is exactly how I want to spend my Christmas Eve.”

“Hey,” Sam frowned, “How am I supposed to figure out what to get a woman that deserves everything? It’s hard.”

“Trouty has a point,” Santana nods and thinks about her own gift for her mother. It’s not nearly enough for what she actually deserves but she hopes she’ll like it anyway.

“I’m just messing with you,” Mercedes teases and presses a kiss to his cheek which makes Santana and Quinn’s brows rise.

They didn’t know they were a thing still, it kind of makes Santana swell with pride. She always liked those two together and genuinely hoped that they’d work it out at some point. Mercedes was her Troubletones home girl and Santana remembered how she use to light up around him.

She’d never admit it aloud, but it was kind of cute or whatever.

“Is Brittany with you somewhere too?” Mercedes asks Santana while Quinn talks to Sam about some jewelry store sale that he might find luck in.

“No, she’s visiting her family in San Francisco for the holidays this year,” Santana tells her with a shrug.

Mercedes looks surprised, “And you didn’t go with? I’m shocked.”

Santana chuckles at that and wonders if Mercedes thinks she and Brittany have been together all this time. She can’t remember the last time she even spoke to Mercedes, maybe the last time she was back in Lima for Thanksgiving? She isn’t sure, maybe Sam told her something. Either way, she likes the fact that Mercedes still thinks they’re joined at the hip.

“Couldn’t leave my mom alone for Christmas,” Santana replies and quickly changes the subject, “How about you? Have you been living here this whole time or are you just visiting?”

Mercedes sends her a look of disbelief, “Girl no, I’m only here visiting my family and my man. L.A. is my home now. I’ve been trying to get Sam to move out there with me for awhile but it really is a different pace out there.”

“That’s awesome,” Santana says and she’s genuinely happy for her, “You know, Nationals are in L.A. this year. Might see you around!”

“Nationals? You take over the Glee Club?” Mercedes asks.

“No way, Mr. Schue is still all over that,” Santana laughs, “Britt, Quinn and I coach the Cheerios now. It’s a long story.”

“Ah, that’s right,” Mercedes nods, “Sam did mention something about it. I couldn’t make it to Sue’s funeral. How are you liking it? The coaching thing? Make anyone cry yet?”

“Maybe,” Santana smirks devilishly, “You know me.”

“Unfortunately I do,” Mercedes chuckles, “Well, when you guys make it to L.A. let me know! I’ll show you around or something.”

“Deal!” Santana grins before Quinn’s interjecting about scheduling a day to catch up before Mercedes heads home. Of all the people that Santana could possibly run into at the Lima Mall, she’s happy that it was Mercedes and Sam. Well, mostly Mercedes.

“So Trouty, hitting up a jewelry store for your mom?” Santana asks once Quinn and Mercedes get to talking about some church service they want to attend together. Sam looks a little surprised that Santana’s making small talk with him, but he just wipes away the pretzel salt with the back of his hand.

“Yeah, Quinn was telling me about it. I hadn’t even thought about jewelry,” Sam answers, “How about you? Got all your shopping done already?”

Santana nods, “My list of people I needed to shop for was pretty short. Just needed to get things for my mom, Q and Britt.”

“Awh, you got me a present?” Quinn teases and reaches around Mercedes to poke at Santana’s shoulder.

“Yeah so you better have gotten me one too,” Santana quips making Sam and Mercedes chuckle.

“Well, we better get going. Don’t want be here when all hell breaks loose,” Mercedes says and hooks her arm with Sam’s.

They all exchange hugs again and bid each other a Merry Christmas. Santana even hugs Sam in the end which she’s sure would make Brittany so proud if she was around to see it. She’s just chalking it up to the Christmas Spirit though.

“I can’t believe they’re still together!” Quinn gasps once they’re far enough from the couple, “I wonder if Britt has known this whole time and just didn’t tell us?”

“Look, probably…she’s sneaky like that,” Santana replies, a small smile creeping up at the mention of her name, “She’d probably say well you guys didn’t ask so…”

“Ugh, she so would!” Quinn groans playfully.

They spend another hour or so people-watching before Quinn drops Santana home again and tells her she’ll be checking up on her in a few days.

“Yeah okay, whatever,” Santana brushes her off but then they both go in for a hug, “Merry Christmas, Q.”

“Merry Christmas, Santana,” Quinn says with a pat on her back before Santana heads inside.

She’s surprised to see Maribel home relatively early and calls out to her, “Hey Mami!”

“Hi mija!” Maribel greets and her voice is coming from the kitchen. Santana follows after it and finds a collection of various Chinese takeout boxes.

Santana is in awe, “Woah, did you order everything on the menu?”

“We have to keep our tradition alive, right?” Maribel laughs.

“Oh yeah!” Santana beams and they both dive in and pile their plates high before wandering into the living room to watch Love, Actually. It’s something that they usually do when Maribel visits Santana in New York, but she’s glad that the tradition has carried over to Lima too. It’s something that’s just for them and Santana sits contently through the movie with her mom at her side.

Maribel had said goodnight awhile ago, but Santana decided to finish the movie in the living room while she awaited Brittany’s nightly phone call. She doesn’t realize she has fallen asleep on the couch until she feels something vibrating at her side. When she blinks her tired eyes open, she finds the fleece throw draped over her and the tv turned low. The Christmas tree lights cast a warm glow around the room and she feels so comfy cozy that Santana almost forgets why she woke up in the first place.

She reaches for her phone tucked under her hip and quickly swipes the screen before the call goes to voicemail.

“Hey Britt,” Santana chuckles with her voice a little raspy from just waking up.

“Hi Santana,” Brittany’s cheery voice greets down the line. There’s a soft gasp, “I’m sorry, did I wake you?”

Santana stretches and cranes her neck back to rest against the decorative pillow, “No, I was just resting my eyes.”

“Are you sure? I can call back in the morning?”

Santana smiles softly, “Talk to me. How was your day?”

“Well, my day…it was so much fun. I got to hang out with my cousins – who aren’t as mean as when we were younger – and we helped my grandma bake cookies for tomorrow,” Brittany tells her excitedly, “Did you see the pictures I sent?”

Santana smiles and remembers Brittany’s text she received while she was out with Quinn. It was a picture of a very colorful pair of gingerbread women that she was holding up proudly by either side of her head, a great big smile rounding out the adorableness.

“Yeah I saw it,” Santana tells her, “It was very cute. Sounds like you’re having a great time over there.”

“Yeah, but it’s not all that great since you’re not here too,” Brittany answers without missing a beat, “How about your day? Did…you have any visitors?”

“Ah so you did enlist Quinn to kidnap me,” Santana smirks.

“What? No. Wait, did she kidnap you because that’s not what I asked her to do?”

Santana laughs at that, “No she didn’t, but she did interrupt my Chopped marathon. I never did find out who won the dessert round…” She could hear Brittany snort as she continues, “But it wasn’t so bad hanging out with her. We actually ran into Sam and Mercedes at the mall.”

“No way! I thought Mercedes was only going to be in Lima for New Years?”

“Well I didn’t know she was going to be in Lima at all,” Santana jokes, “Have you known they’ve been dating this whole time?”

“I wouldn’t say whole time…they’re on and off. You know how tough long distance is, but they always end up back together.”

Santana ponders her words, “Huh, sounds familiar. Can’t believe you’ve been holding out on me all this time.”

Brittany chuckles, “Honestly I didn’t think you’d care, but I don’t want to talk about them. What are you doing right now?”

Santana notices a shift in Brittany’s tone – something mischievous – and it makes Santana sit up a little straighter, “Uhh…I’m just lying on the couch watching tv.”

“Right…” Brittany drawls out and suddenly Santana’s intrigued to see where this goes because she might have an idea, “Same couch we made out on on Thanksgiving?”

Santana’s suspicions are confirmed when she hears that, “We’ve made out many times on this couch, Britt, not just Thanksgiving.”

“Mmm, and we’ve done a lot more than make out there too.”

Santana feels a flush cover her cheeks at the memory but she presses further, “You should see what I’ve got on right now too.”

She thinks she can hear Brittany audibly gulp which is hilarious because in reality, she’s just dressed in leggings and Brittany’s sweater from Homecoming. It’s nothing too risqué, but who is she if she doesn’t play along and paint Britt a lovely picture?

Brittany’s voice is husky when she says, “Tell me.”

“I don’t know, Britt, Santa’s coming to town any minute now,” Santana teases, loving how easy it is for them to turn their conversations flirtatious, “Wouldn’t want to get a free show and risk missing out on my presents. I’ve been a very good girl this year.”

“Fuck a present, I can give you something better.”

Santana has to bite her lip to keep from snorting at the sound of Brittany cursing. It’s rare but when it happens, it’s the greatest thing ever because Britt kind of has a potty mouth during certain situations.

It’s kind of hot actually.

“Hmm…I’ll hold you to that, Britt-Britt,” Santana says just as the grandfather clock chimes from the other room, signaling midnight. At least, for Santana it is. Brittany still has a few more hours to go with the time difference.

“It’s officially Christmas!” Brittany cheers excitedly – the huskiness completely gone – and she’s so loud about it that it nearly deafens Santana. The lusty tone has been replaced with a child-like delight as a familiar ringtone replaces static.

When Santana looks down at her phone, she sees Brittany requesting a video call. She swipes at it and soon her screen is filled with a rosy-cheeked Brittany wearing an elf hat.

“Merry Christmas!” Brittany sings accompanied with this cute shoulder shimmy that would put Kurt Hummel to shame. She’s all kinds of adorable and Santana really can’t help but feel smitten.

“Merry Christmas!” Santana replies breathlessly and watches as Brittany’s eyes scan her up and down. She tilts her head at the way Brittany is not-so-subtly checking her out and asks, “Uhm, can I help you?”

“You’re wearing my sweater again,” Brittany points out through a smirk, “Not as risky as what I was imagining you wearing, but I’m not mad at it. You’re cute.”

“Do I even want to know what you were imagining?” Santana asks and watches Brittany wiggle her brows.

“Let’s just say it didn’t involve a sweater…or any clothing for that matter.”

“You’re a horny mess,” Santana giggles.

“Can you blame me?” Brittany jokes, “My girlfriend is hot and all I want for Christmas is to put my – ”

“Hey, don’t start something you can’t finish,” Santana cuts in and suddenly her eyes feel heavy again.

“You’re right. You look tired,” Brittany comments through a soft smile, “You should head up to bed.”

“I will, just wanted to talk to you for a bit more before I did. I’ve missed you today,” Santana says shyly as she picks at the fabric of the blanket across her lap, “Well, I’ve missed you everyday but a little more so today.”

“Awh, look at you,” Brittany coos and Santana’s cheeks instantly flush.

“I’ve been playing the piano again,” Santana tells her then suddenly she feels a kind of sadness, “It reminds me of things and makes me miss people.”

She knows she’s being really vague but she also knows Brittany gets it.

“Oh honey,” Brittany says tenderly and there’s this apologetic smile on her face, “I’ll be home before you know it, only one more week left now. Maybe you can play something for me?”

Santana melts at the sound of home and wonders if Brittany considers that to be Lima or her or both. It’s a silly thought because she thinks she knows the answer to that already. It’s just nice to hear her say it out loud and it makes Santana rethink who or where she considers home too.

“Maybe I will,” Santana beams but just as she was about to continue, a yawn escapes her.

“San, go to bed…” Brittany says and she’s giving her this cross between a smile and a pout so of course Santana has to listen.

She rubs at her eye and nods, “Yeah okay, I’m going. You think…we can stay on the phone tonight?”

There’s something familiar about the request and it seems like they both pick up on it because Brittany nods and soon she’s up too. A moment later and they’re both doing their nightly routine together.

It’s something they use to do when they were doing long distance just to make them feel a little closer together although it was never as good as the real thing. Back then, Santana hated that feeling but now she doesn’t mind it so much. She knows it’s only temporary and soon Brittany will be here in person trying to leave toothpaste-coated kisses on her cheek again.

A moment later, Santana is tucked away in bed with her phone propped up next to her. She watches Brittany through half-lidded eyes as she tells her more about the day she has had with her family. There’s this warmth or softness or something that surrounds Santana while she listens to Brittany gush over her cousin’s two year old daughter. Santana’s really biting her cheek, hoping nothing slips out like it did with Maribel but imagining Brittany with this toddler does something to Santana’s fluttery insides.

She’s blaming the lack of sleep for this one.

“You should’ve seen it, San. She was so cute! Sprinkles were going everywhere,” Brittany giggles, “Then I had to clean up after her which was a little less exciting, but I didn’t mind. It was her first time decorating cookies, it was bound to get messy.”

“Sounds like fun,” Santana replies. She’s shocked that she’s managed to say just that although her head fills with images of what their family would look like a little ways down the line. She imagines a little blonde with Santana’s complexion and Brittany’s smile toddling around their living room. She imagines coming home from work to that same little blonde head curled up at Brittany’s side as they nap on the couch. She imagines the first words and first steps and she realizes something: she can’t wait to have a family with Brittany.

She also realizes that she’s about to be caught in her daydreaming.

“What are you smiling about over there?” Brittany asks, her smile matching Santana’s

Santana feels like a deer caught in the headlights, but she manages recover before her truth comes tumbling out on her again. Letting her thoughts on marriage slip out is one thing, but talking about a family? Way too soon, Lopez!

“Just thinking about how cute you would’ve looked decorating cookies,” Santana says, “There’s this face you pull when you’re concentrating really hard…just adorable.”

Brittany rolls her eyes as she smiles bashfully, “I don’t know how anyone thinks you’re so big and bad when you’re actually the gushiest and mushiest person I know.”

“You take that back,” Santana narrows her eyes playfully. She ends softening a moment later, “You bring it out of me, I can’t help myself around you.”

“I know,” Brittany replies as she tucks her hand under her pillow, mirroring Santana’s position, “It’s my favorite thing.”

Santana sighs and snuggles deep against her pillow as their conversation lulls. She’s really feeling the heaviness in her eyelids now, but she finds herself trying to fight to stay awake. She just wants to be present and listen to any and every story Brittany has to tell, she doesn’t want to miss anything.

“You wanna know something?” Brittany whispers a bit later and the sudden sound of her voice has Santana struggling to look up. She finds Brittany’s eyes closed and if she didn’t know any better, she would’ve assumed she had fallen asleep already.

Santana’s not sure she’s coherent enough herself to form actual words, so she just hums out in response.

There’s a long pause and Santana almost falls asleep while waiting when Brittany begins to mumble sleepily, “We’re gonna make some cute babies.”

Santana’s eyes go wide at that.

Here she was, forcing herself to stay quiet in fear that she was going to scare Brittany off or something. She looks back to her and finds she’s still lying there with her eyes closed which makes her wonder if that was the sleep talking or if it was Brittany? She doesn’t know, but she finds comfort in at least being on the same page about something like this. She wants to laugh, but stifles it so she doesn’t wake Brittany. It makes her heart swell and nearly burst free from her chest though, because if Brittany’s thinking about what their family could look like then maybe Santana’s on to something here.

She hadn’t considered proposing anytime soon, but if Brittany keeps this up she doesn’t know how long she’ll actually last. If anything, she can at least be a little prepared. Right?

“One day, Britt-Britt.” Santana says and it’s the last thing she does before she falls into a deep sleep.

Maybe it has something to do with the New Year just around the corner, but in the days leading up to Brittany’s return, Santana does a lot of thinking.

She thinks about the conversation she had with Maribel the night before Brittany left for San Francisco. She thinks about her family, her Abuela and Abuelo, and the difference in the ways they showed their love for her. She thinks about her father and how easy it was for him to vanish from her life. She thinks about the people in her life at this very moment who love her unconditionally and have repeatedly come through for her, whether it has been all of her life or again in only the last year.

She thinks a lot about love and remembers a time long, long ago when she didn’t think she was worthy of it. She was harsh and tore people down with her vicious words without a second thought so she didn’t think anyone would ever break through that and attempt to understand the real Santana Lopez.

Then Brittany came into her life and everything started to change.

She was still harsh and tore people down with her vicious words, but with Brittany it was different. Brittany accepted all of the parts that Santana was made of and she never shied away, she only ever wanted Santana to be herself and embrace all of her awesome.

It makes her think about something her Abuelo once said to her a long time ago. She was only in middle school when she first experienced heartbreak, her boyfriend of three weeks had broken up with her for someone more popular and Santana was wrecked. Maybe not so much because a boy broke up with her, but more so because he didn’t want her anymore. She felt replaceable and it sucked.

She had cried with her Abuelo during their weekly piano lesson and he said, “Santana, the easy part of life is finding someone to love. The hard part is finding someone to love you back.” He reminded her of how she still had so much time and that she was better off without that stupid boy. Those words always stuck with her throughout her life.

Little did they both know, Santana would find her person just a couple years later.

She remembered standing in the hall in front of her locker, tears in her eyes, begging Brittany to love her back. She had been so sure this time, she had found her person, but things didn’t come easy for them at first. She thought she had made a mistake again and gave her heart to the wrong one, but then something crazy happened…

“I do love you! Clearly you don’t love you as much as I do or you'd put this shirt on and dance with me!”

Brittany was pissed – probably the most pissed she had ever seen – but it was in that moment that Santana realized something: Brittany just wanted Santana to love herself first. She could see straight through Santana’s bullshit and even after that she wasn’t afraid to call her out on it. Even more importantly, Brittany still loved her anyway.

A lot of their relationship had been full of moments like that, like sudden clarity where all the drama and hurt suddenly made sense because on the other side of that was this…happiness.

She wouldn’t trade it for the world.

It’s New Year’s Eve and Santana’s desperately trying to ghost Quinn.

A couple days ago, Quinn got word of a New Year’s Eve party being hosted at Breadstix and has been trying to convince Santana to go ever since.

“Come on, it’ll be fun! Mercedes is going and she’ll perform at midnight, you have to go.” Quinn had urged but Santana wasn’t budging. She didn’t feel like celebrating when her person wasn’t going to be there to celebrate with. She didn’t have to say that for Quinn to pick up on it though, “You can’t ring in the New Year alone, San. I know Maribel will be working.”

“What? How do you know that?”

“Don’t worry about it. Just come! There’s a dress code and everything, since when do you turn down any excuse to paint on one of your hooker dresses?”

Santana rolled her eyes, “I have no one to impress so there’s no point.”

“I can’t believe I’m saying this but, you can always take pictures and send them to Brittany.”

“Please, as if a picture could capture all this hotness.”

“Well it’s all you can eat breadsticks – “

“It’s always all you can eat breadsticks if you talk to the right person.”

“Ugh, why are you like this? Can’t you just go with me? I don’t want to third-wheel with Mercedes and Sam…”

“You really aren’t going to drop this, are you?”

“No. So you’ll go?”

Santana stewed on the question for awhile until she ultimately gave up and agreed to go. It would be a little depressing being stuck home alone on New Year’s Eve and she knew Brittany wouldn’t want her to miss out on a chance to party with her friends.

And it’s that kind of thinking that has landed her in the current situation she’s in, wedged between Quinn and Sam in a booth in Breadstix while they watch Mercedes sing. All in all, it’s not the worst situation she’s ever been in – she’s totally being dramatic – but it does feel off to hang out with everyone without Brittany there.

“She’s so good,” Sam compliments as Mercedes belts out a high note. Santana looks to him from the corner of her eye and he’s completely fixated on the woman on stage. There’s this dopey smile on his face and love hearts beaming from his eyes and for the first time maybe ever, she knows exactly how Sam feels. To be so enamored by someone, so filled with love for them, that you can’t help but to stare in awe.

“Amazing,” Quinn adds breathlessly as the final note rings out.

The entire place stands as they applaud Mercedes. She bows graciously and waves, even blows a kiss to Sam before she makes her way down the steps and rejoins her friends at their booth. A jazzy cover band takes over while dinner is served.

“You killed it up there,” Santana says as the salads come out.

“Thank you,” Mercedes replies with a flip of her hair, “I’m glad you made it out tonight, would’ve missed the surprise.”

“Surprise?” Santana wonders before she catches her usual waitress’s eye. She sends her a look and soon an additional basket of breadsticks appear on the table. She slaps away Sam’s hand as he goes for a stick and the girls all laugh.

“You’ll see later,” Quinn says, “I’ve been practicing my runs so I can keep up with this one.”

“You’re going up there?” Santana asks then glares at Mercedes, “And you didn’t ask me?”

“It was a last minute thing,” Mercedes explains, “And I was already talking to Quinn at the time.”

“I’m deeply offended that I wasn’t your first choice,” Santana quips in between bites of her breadstick, “Could’ve brought back River Deep, Mountain High.”

“Girl, you know this place couldn’t handle all that..” Mercedes laughs.

Dinner goes on without a hitch. It actually is kind of nice chatting with her old friends and she’s glad she made it out of the house for this. She couldn’t imagine spending the night at home getting wine drunk alone while watching the ball drop, if she even stayed up that late to catch it. She has an alarm set for midnight in Brittany’s time zone just incase she did end up falling asleep early though.

“When’s Britt back again?” Mercedes asks as the last course came around, “I hope I can catch her before I go back to L.A.”

“Two more days,” Santana replies and just uttering the words aloud make her heart race, “This has been the longest two weeks of my life.”

“I’m sure,” Mercedes chuckles.

“When are you heading back?” Santana asks.

“Thursday,” Mercedes replies, “So I might be able to see her before I go. We’ll see.”

Santana nods and looks to Quinn who has been oddly quiet all of a sudden, “You’re quiet. What are you plotting?”

Quinn cracks a smile, “Plotting? Can’t a girl eat in peace?”

“I guess,” Santana chuckles and they return to their meals while listening to the band.

Sam’s in the middle of telling a story about this guy he was working with at the gym he works at part-time when Santana checked her phone. She hadn’t received a new text for a few hours now, not since she was modeling different outfits she had been considering to wear tonight for Brittany earlier. It was getting closer to midnight now – just thirty minutes away – but Santana was getting anxious. She kind of missed Brittany and just wanted to hear her voice.

“I’m gonna go call Britt,” She whispers to Quinn.

Quinn nods and slides so that she could let Santana out of the booth.

Santana made her way to the bathroom, opting that it was warmer than outside and quieter than the lobby, and made the call.

At least, she tried to but the call went unanswered. Santana checked the time again and converted it to what it would be for Brittany and it started to make sense. This was usually game night time and the Pierces were probably deep in a very competitive game of Monopoly. Brittany was always pretty serious when it came to that particular game so Santana didn’t think too much of it and instead sent her a selfie and a text.

Santana L. – Thinking about you xo

Santana rejoins the gang just as Mercedes is getting up to perform again. She looks to Quinn who moves to sit back down and asks, “You’re not going up too?”

“Not my time yet,” Quinn shrugs and scoots in so that she’s the one sitting in Mercedes spot next to Sam now.

Santana slides in too and goes for her wine glass as Mercedes greets the audience again. She’s such a natural up there and Santana is actually really proud of how successful she has become and still manages to stay true to herself.

She thinks about her future career and what she wants but it’s all so spotty. She loves to sing, but she doesn’t know if she’d ever do it professionally. She has this business degree yet she’s not putting it to use and before she randomly took over a co-coaching position, she was a singing waitress.

She’s young but seeing Mercedes up there really gets her thinking about getting serious when it comes to her future. Afterall, it’s not only affecting her, it’ll affect Brittany too. She wants to make something of herself, maybe make a difference in people’s lives, but she doesn’t know where to start.

Those thoughts are cut short when suddenly Mercedes is speaking to the audience again, more specifically to her. Santana was kind of zoned out so she only catches Mercedes saying, “Let’s end the year with this little throwback since I’m surrounded by such talented friends.”

Before Santana knows it a familiar tune begins to play, the God Squad’s version of Cherish/Cherish. Santana starts to laugh as Quinn and Sam pull out their hidden mics and sing to Santana as they accompany Mercedes on the number. They slowly emerge from the booth and join Mercedes on stage, leaving Santana behind in nothing but smiles.

She claps her hands and dances along to the beat from where she sits while memories of the first time they sung the song came to her.

She remembers it from her high school days and how Brittany lit up when their friends began to serenade them. Brittany had been so surprised that Santana would gift her something like that, something so public which she was still struggling with at the time. When it came to Brittany though, Santana endured a lot to make sure Brittany knew she was loved.

Santana felt so carefree that night, she barely even noticed any of the talks or looks. She doubted Sugar would’ve allowed anyone in if that were the case, but hearing the song being performed now is a little bittersweet without Brittany here to experience it.

Santana goes to grab her phone in hopes that Brittany will answer this time just so she can hear this awesome performance. She’s about to press call when someone stops before their table.

A familiar voice asks, “Is this seat taken?”

Santana snaps up to find Brittany – her Brittany – standing there before her with her long blonde hair cascading off her shoulders, blue eyes twinkling, and the smuggest grin on her face.

“Oh my God, Brittany!” Santana just about squeals as she scrambles out of the booth and launches herself into Brittany’s arms, “You’re home early!”

Brittany’s angelic giggles fill her ears as she wraps Santana up in a tight hug, “Missed you too much so I caught an early flight home. Came straight here from the airport.”

“What?”

Brittany shrugs casually, “I figured we’ve had such an awesome year, I didn’t want to spend the last moments of it apart.”

Santana stares back almost speechless and instead leans in for a much-needed kiss. It’s like her body has been on pause ever since the last one they shared at the airport and when their lips touch it’s like she’s finally herself again.

“You like my surprise?” Brittany asks when they pull apart and glances to the side.

Santana’s jaw drops as she follows Brittany’s eyes to where she looks. Santana sees her wave to their friends on stage. Mercedes and Sam wave back while Quinn sends them a wink.

“You did this?” Santana’s wide eyed, “I…how did you – “

Brittany leans down and cuts her off with another kiss before saying, “I’ll tell you later. Come dance with me.”

Santana doesn’t even respond, just gets whisked away to the makeshift dancefloor. It’s all so reminiscent but new at the same time to be dancing with Brittany in almost the exact same spot to the exact same song. Santana thinks she might just be the luckiest girl in the whole world, to be loved by Brittany and their friends, it’s so much.

And the feeling only intensifies when Brittany whispers out an, “I love you.”

It makes the question begging to be asked so much harder for Santana to conceal, especially when Brittany smiles down at her the way that she does while they sway to the music.

“I love you too,” Santana says but it’s filled with so much more, so much promise.

Maybe Brittany doesn’t pick up on it, Santana hopes she doesn’t, but that I love you means more this time. It’s a vow that she’s never going to stop loving her and one day she’ll have a ring to prove that.

For now though, she’s content with dancing the night away with Brittany but only until the clock strikes twelve. She’ll ring in the new year with her girl, surrounded by their friends, but after that she’s taking Brittany home to spend all night making good on a different promise.

A promise that doesn’t involve quite so many people and a lot less clothes.

The heated look Santana earns when Brittany catches her eye tells her that she and Brittany are definitely on the same page. It’s barely 12:03am when the two are hurriedly telling their friends goodbye and rushing to the car with their hands already starting to wander.

#Two Ghosts #brittana #brittana fanfiction #fanfics

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theastrophilearchitect · 3 years

Text

A new project.

Because the first one wasn’t working. Writing journey #3.

Tue 30/03/2021 - ‘Bay Tree’ Word Count: 42,150 07.27 Hello! So I established in my last writing update that I was taking a break from my WIP ‘Bay Tree’, to return May 10th, and even though I’m not writing today, I just wanted to say that taking a break feels amazing. I’m focusing on reading (granted, I’ve been reading House of Earth and Blood for like two weeks) and it’s really helping ideas for edits develop.

In my draft, I got to chapter 13 (I think) of twenty-something (because I didn’t fully outline the climax, so I’m unclear as to how many chapters there will ultimately be) but I just don’t think I can get all the way through a draft without first doing some developmental edits. So, for the next few weeks, I’m going to note the changes I think I could make, then figure out which ones I won’t implement, then how I will implement the others on May 10th.

In the meantime, this Thursday, I’m going to start working on a new WIP, which I have quite a clear idea for, but obviously need to develop the plot. So that’s it for today, and I’ll update again for my new project on Thursday April 1st.

Thu 01/04/2021 09.54 It is Thursday! I’m free for a couple weeks! Which means it’s time to start working on a new project. My goal for the day is just to compile some of the various ideas I have into something vaguely cohesive, then I’ll develop it tomorrow, and hopefully make a skeletal outline on Saturday, scene block on Sunday... I’m going to shut up before I set myself a thousand insane deadlines, but I’d like to have started a draft by the end of my free time. So, let’s go.

Wow. Blank documents really are intimidating, aren’t they?

13.04 I already had my core concept, but now I have almost a justification for it--why it happens, and I think I want to build up my world first, then characters, because knowing the world and its various peoples will allow me to figure out how exactly they fit in and develop their motivations, then finally do the plot. I’ll only work out the three characters I’m currently certain will be integral for the plot, because I don’t want to waste time on developing characters who are ultimately unnecessary, like I did in the earliest days of Bay Tree.

Basically, with a world, I can work out motivations; with motivations, I can work out characters, and with characters, I can create a character-driven plot. I want to focus on creating both lovable characters and a memorable plot--I know all my favourite books have memorable characters, but the ones I enjoy the absolute most are the ones where it doesn’t feel like the plot only exists to drive the characters into relationships (I’m looking at you, Cassandra Clare. Seriously, I love Shadowhunters books, but the technically ‘main’ plots always feel second to the subplots).

Fri 02/04/2021 08.16 Honestly, didn’t get too much done yesterday. Mostly because I ended up down a rabbit hole of researching (though I do think what I learned will help me to form my world), and I was busier than I expected to be. Regardless, I think I want to make this a series. I have a feeling Bay Tree is also going to become at least two books when I revisit it, but I’m going to go into this one with that intention.

Obviously I don’t know how long it will be right now, but I think I’m going to aim for three books, then let it shape itself.

12.25 I just spent an hour writing out a history of the world and how it got to where it is. This is really fun, but really intense.

16.36 So, I have a rough plot in mind. I have an ending, a catalyst, a backstory for the world, and a few characters. And a lot of things that need names. I waited a really long time to name my characters in Bay Tree, thinking they’d be easier to name when I had then conceptualised, which makes sense, but I’d given them numbers with which to refer to them until that point, so it was a long time before my protagonist became her actual name instead of just ‘3′, despite the fact she technically became 2 because I had to cut 1.

Anyway, going to pick names, then let nominative determinism do its thing.

Jesus, I have no good male names. I keep a list of names, first and last, I like for use, but I have so many more female ones than I do male.

In Bay Tree, I used MBTIs as a starting point for personalities, which I’m planning to do here, especially since I know the types so much better now, but I want names first.

Maybe I just ought to choose this specific character’s surname first. Maybe he goes by his surname, or some variation thereupon (like how Daniel Arlington from Ninth House goes by Darlington).

Maybe he doesn’t need a name. Maybe we literally just call him Hero Guy.

God, screw this. He’s Hero Guy until either it comes to me, or I have no choice but to name him.

Sat 03/04/2021 11.15 I feel like crap today. I’ve been doing nothing for three hours, and I, quite frankly, need to get something done. So I’m going to write.

12.41 Wow, initial development really is the hardest bit of the process, huh?

Sun 04/04/2021 08.04 I’d really like to do more worldbuilding first, and character development, but it’s difficult when I don’t know the different parts’ roles. So, today, I’m going to attempt to outline the primary plot points of the three books. Attempt being the operative word here.

13.41 Honestly, yeah, I’m struggling with the plot. I think I managed to get Bay Tree’s plot so fast when I sat down to actually write it because it had been on my brain for a couple weeks, whereas I literally started this project three days ago.

Maybe that’s how I’ll handle this--when I hit a wall with one project, I work on the other to give myself some distance. Working on Bay Tree requires less thought anyway, because that plot’s already mostly figured out. Yeah. I think I’m going to revisit Bay Tree, but for reference’s sake, I’m going to dub the new project... eh... the first thing that came to mind was ‘Feather President’ which is more related to the actual content than ‘Bay Tree’, but it sounds so much crazier. I want to dub it something that actually could be a title, even if it definitely won’t be the final title, because I don’t want people to look at my blog, see ‘Feather President’ in the pinned post and immediately assume I’m insane.

Could always just use an acronym. Let’s go with FSB; those are one of the character’s (also the only character who so far has a name) initials, which may ultimately change, but it works for now. Bay Tree and FSB.

I’m going to end this particular writing stint here and come back in a couple hours, at which point I’m going to switch back to Bay Tree.

I should really stop planning so far ahead when my plans will inevitably change.

15.40 So here’s the plan I currently have that I definitely won’t stick to: at the start of each week, I’ll determine which project I work on (operating Monday-Sunday; if you think the week starts any day but Monday, you’re wrong, and I’m not sorry), and only work on that project throughout the week. So I’ll work on Bay Tree this week, and FSB next week.

I’m going to let myself work on a project for more than one week at a time, but I think I’m going to say I can only work on one for three consecutive weeks before I have to switch to the other. This seems like a good way to stay excited. Yes.

This second? Not completely sure. Might just go read and deal with it tomorrow.

Mon 05/04/2021 - ‘Bay Tree’ 11.37 Actually really glad I just sat down and read--I read about 200 pages yesterday in total, which meant I could easily finish the last 100 pages this morning. So I finished Starsight (the recent reads post will probably be up by the time this one is)--was anyone aware the A Court of Silver Flames paperback is £24 on Amazon? Anyone?

Anyway, we’re returning to Bay Tree today, after nearly two weeks (I know that’s not even long), and I’m going to attempt to implement my edits, by which I mean I’m going to put scene changes at the bottom in brackets, then technically implement them when I redraft.

Tue 06/04/2021 - ‘Bay Tree’ 09.11 I didn’t exactly accomplish much yesterday. I spent a good few hours just watching YouTube, because I didn’t have any motivation to do work, which screwed up my schedule, and I did no writing aside from transferring my list of edits from my phone to my document. I started reading Call Down the Hawk by Maggie Stiefvater, but didn’t get very far in--I’m obsessed with Stiefvater’s writing style; it’s the perfect mix between typical prose and fairytale-style storytelling. Anyway.

I’m going to switch to a new Scrivener project for the sake of cleaning it up--Bay Tree is a hot mess right now--and hopefully begin to implement my edits--maybe not today, but certainly this week.

Thu 08/04/2021 - ‘Bay Tree’ 16.53 So I haven’t yet had a day where I’ve done nothing (since my break finished), but the last couple days I’ve just been doing tiny amounts of what I’m calling ‘reference pruning’, where I’m just editing and clarifying character, worldbuilding and location documents. I’ve ‘pruned’ five character references, and I hate it. It needs to be done, but it doesn’t need to be done now. I’ve decided I’m just going to completely clear out the new Scrivener project I started for Bay Tree, and add stuff to it as it becomes necessary. I’m going to make notes of overarching edits (stuff I can’t just note at the bottom of a scene), and just get started with draft 1.7, adding and editing references as it becomes necessary. I’m also going to say I just need to spend an hour writing a day, rather than a word minimum.

Okay. Edits established. Things to bear in mind established. I need to go through the character profile for the POV character in chapter one, then we can get started. Or rather, I’ll get started tomorrow, because I need to go cook soon, and even if I do have time after dinner, I’m not going to, because I’m going to read then. Okay. Character.

I’m getting excited again!

Oh, and the setting. I need to do the setting document.

I’d like to draw attention tot he fact one of my character documents describes her as having ‘black upturned gold eyes.’

Clearly I couldn’t pick a colour, but now I’m inspired to give her heterochromia.

Character done, and setting undone, but I need to go cook now, so I’ll pick this back up tomorrow, when I may also do some actual work.

I just hope these posts give someone security in that writing is a messy process, and you don’t have to be perfect all the time to be a) competent, and b) a writer. I’m a competent writer, and I’ve only ever written about 60% of a draft. But I’m still going, still trying, and that’s the point.

Fri 09/04/2021 - ‘Bay Tree’: 484 words 09.15 Okay. So we’re redrafting, and this is like my fourth draft of the first chapter, so let’s just go.

Sun 11/04/2021 - ‘Bay Tree’: 576 words 09.01 Yeah, I missed yesterday. Ironically, having time off seems to be making productivity more difficult, despite the fact I actually have time for it.

09.19 I feel like this project is making me stagnate. I think what I have is almost subconsciously tying me down, preventing me from improving, but I don’t want to just restart, because I want my bases, and it’s so ingrained in my head, I can’t physically start from scratch. Crap.

I think it needs to sit for longer. Crap.

It’s alright. I mean, it sucks, but it’s alright. It’s not like there’s any ideal age to become an author anyway, and I’m a long way off the average. I have time, and if it takes shelving projects now to complete better ones later, so be it. Maybe I’ll return to Bay Tree in a few weeks, or a few months, or a few years, or never, but I’ve learnt a lot from it.

So we move on.

Mon 12/04/2021 - FSB 08.05 This post is such a mess. I’m a mess at the moment. Today, we’re just continuing to work on FSB’s plot, and I think I’m already going to change the name of the character whose initials are FSB, so its nickname will probably change, too.

I had a trilogy in mind, but looking at it now, I think a duology will be best to convey the arc I have in mind.

21.51 I’ve actually accomplished quite a lot today--I’ve mostly been doing character profiles, but that helps me form tidbits to add to the story, which I can eventually string together. We’re progressing.

Tue 13/04/2021 - FSB 08.37 Hello! I think I can safely come to the conclusion I prefer development to actual drafting. Anyway, today I’m going to focus on completing the character profile for my other protagonist and do a little more work on another important figure. Then, I hope to be able to figure out the drive of the main plot in book one.

On another note, I am debating whether to plan out two books or three. Mulling it over, I think three books would give a more fulfilling arc, but it depends if I can work out enough content for the main plot. We’ll see.

Yeah, it’s going to be three. Two just can’t carry the impact I want.

20.00 I made pretty good progress today, but I just wanted to make the point I’m a lot more confident this project will hold my interest for longer than Bay Tree. This was something ruminating in the back of my mind for weeks, that I was desperate to write, where Bay Tree was very much a ‘sit down, make something up’ process at the beginning. Anyway, I think I’m done writing for the day, and I’ll get back to this tomorrow. (Because unlike most writers, I have a functional sleep schedule)

Wed 14/04/2021 09.19 Honestly, my head is empty right now, so I really need to open my project before determining what I want to do today.

Okay, so we’re basically just going to continue filling in holes.

14.50 Working out the plot, I’m pretty confident I’ve got the A plot covered, which the B plot will fit into, but I need more subplots.

Thu 15/04/2021 10.12 I want to work this one out mostly on the fly. I have nearly the whole of book one plotted out, but I want to work out the fine details as I write it; as I go, I’ll add more detail to my outlines of two and three. But for now, book one.

15.28 I’ve got basically the whole of book one covered; there’s just a gaping hole in act one, that I’m not sure I can fill. I mean, I can fill it, and I will, but I don’t feel like it’ll be that intentional of a thing. I think it’ll be more of an accidental idea that happens to flourish, but I’m going to keep working nonetheless.

Fri 16/04/2021 14.08 Good afternoon! I would’ve started writing earlier, but I wanted to catch up on the reading I didn’t do yesterday to make sure I finish A Court of Silver Flames within a week, so I can return the ebook and get a refund, because, despite being £6 cheaper than the paperback, it still cost me £8, and I want my money back. (Seriously, the paperback is fourteen pounds on amazon. Which is nearly twenty dollars. Which is pretty standard for a hardback, but it’s the paperback.) I’m about ten pages off meeting my minimum for the day (though I need to surpass that if I do want to finish it within a week), but it’s writing time.

14.37 I’m still establishing how, exactly, it applies, but I think I’ve solved it!

Definitely happy that as I’m planning, all I want is to make the characters happy, because I already love them so much. But they don’t get to be.

I have a section on a Pinterest board that’s just called ‘Simping’, and is just pictures of couples doing cute as shit things, and I literally just want my characters to dance together. Always. In Bay Tree, in FSB. Just dancing.

15.04 I have book one covered. It still needs development, scene development, but I can now move on to outlining book two, during which I’ll continue to develop one, integrate themes and such.

Honestly, the plot falling into place is absolutely the most exciting part of writing. I get an adrenaline rush (yes, while sitting in a chair, typing), I start to love the characters, the world, the story... ahhhh.

I’m actually really satisfied with how the plot seems to be going.

16.44 The word ambiguous has too many Us in it. Three vowels in a row??? And the vowel sequence is a palindrome?? Don’t want it.

I’m just sat here discovering new music. And it’s all so good and so dramatic and so perfect.

Okay, why do I have to come up with ideas so easily when I don’t need them? Then when I do I have nothing?

17.51 And just to clarify now, this post will actually end with Sunday the 18th, because after that I’m going to take three weeks completely off writing (aside from noting ideas), because I have a lot going on, then I’ll return on May 10th.

Note to self: develop a character who isn’t one of your two protagonists.

Sat 17/04/2021 10.23 I’m thinking I ought to do a more in-depth outline of book one before doing the basis of book two. Help me set up subplots and so on. Yanno, because other characters need some kind of agency, and I currently basically have two characters.

Sun 18/04/2021 08.52 I managed to plot out Bay Tree so fast because I’d already done so much development--plot was the only thing I was still missing. Anyway, I’m having a minor crisis. I think I’m a plotter, but I’m not entirely certain. It clearly didn’t work for Bay Tree. I think I may just start a draft of FSB now, and hope that lets me work out the other two books as I go.

In one of my excessive plans I will probably fail to stick to: I think I’d like to write a draft of the whole trilogy, all the way through, before even editing book one. I’ll obviously make notes of edits as I go, write as if I’ve already made them, eg. if, while writing book two, I have an idea for a book one edit, I’ll write book two as if I’ve already implemented it, which means I’ll have a little less editing to do of book two.

I have this all planned out in my head, but I’m probably being overambitious. We’re staying optimistic, though. I don’t believe in manifesting, but we’re manifesting.

14.23 I want to say I tried. I got a few details for the first couple chapters, but when I opened a doc to actually write it... nope. I need an outline to have a starting point. I just need detail.

Scene blocking sucks. But then I can’t write without it, so what can you do?

And I guess that wraps up this update. Writing this section, I’m about halfway through the writing break, and I have so many more ideas for this project. I was excited for Bay Tree because it was the first time I really made progress, but I’m excited for this one because I genuinely love this story. This post is going up May 14th, at which point I’ll be back to writing, and the next update should come mid to early June.

And that’s a wrap.

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crazycat-88 · 5 years

Text

Male Spider Monster Silus x Gender Neutral Reader (SFW)

Note: This is my first piece of writing in a very long time and my first exophilia story. Written for the awesome OkCryptid Collab. Its also the first instalment of a series of stories I’m currently working on.

A huge thanks goes to @thetravelerwrites for proofreading/editing this piece. She’s an absolute star and fantastic writer, who dedicates a lot of her time to this community, supporting other writers and helping readers find exophilia works by maintaining both the OkCryptid Masterlist & the Exophilia Creators Masterlist. So go give her your love and support over on her blog.

Without further ado, here’s 4,124 words of human/monster romance. Hope you enjoy it.

Sitting at your desk, trying to write the newest chapter of your latest novel, you sigh when you her a ping from your mobile. In all honesty, the distraction is welcome; you’ve been suffering from a major case of writer's block and you’d take any excuse to put your work aside.

Checking your notifications, you sigh again when you see it’s from OkCryptid, the monster and cryptid dating app created to help monsters find mates, that you’d downloaded a couple of weeks beforehand. You had hoped it would give you a better chance at finding the one but so far you’d had the same amount of luck that you had with every other app on the market. Which was none.

You hadn’t been on a date in months. Your last relationship was over three years ago and so far things weren’t looking very positive with this new dating app. Since joining, there were very few matches and all the messages you’d received were either from men just looking to hook up for that night or they were dick pics. You couldn’t fathom why anyone thought that sending a picture of their dick would somehow seduce you but they did it anyway.

Taking a deep breath, you check to see what it’s notifying you off and you see that you have a new match and have been sent a new message from a user named Silus. Swearing to yourself that if it’s another unsolicited picture you were deleting the app, you open the message first without bothering to check his profile. No point in getting your hopes up before seeing what he’s sent you.

[Sent: 2:47pm] Silus: Hey, how are you today? I’ve recently just moved to the area and we’ve matched… So I thought I’d just say hi…

Well, that was a good start. It's certainly the nicest message you’ve received so far. Deciding to check his profile, you gasp, seeing that he’s an arachnid, specifically a spider type, which you’d never seen before.

Most arachnids chose to avoid the city, mainly due to their size and their preference for solitude. They weren’t known to be the most social of creatures and, despite being known to the general public for a couple of centuries, were one of the few species that shunned modern society, choosing to remain in forests or caves far from civilization. You weren’t sure if this was because of their nature or due to the fact that they were one of the few monsters many humans, and even some other monsters, still feared. Even those who weren’t outright scared of arachnid type monsters were still wary and uncomfortable around them.

You’re not sure how you feel about them, never having actually met one but you’re not exactly a fan of spiders. While you aren’t scared of them, they did make you squeamish. Shuddering thinking of the large spider you had to remove from your flat the day before, you decide to at least check over Silus’s profile and pictures.

His profile bio was short and sweet: he stated his name, age, and sexual orientation before going on to say that he loved plants and flowers, music, poetry and going for walks in the moonlight. He’d also added that he had just moved to the city and was looking to make new friends and hopefully find a mate. He had a gallery full of pictures, which were mostly pictures of various types of flowers, but he had a couple of himself.

Enlarging the first picture of himself, which was a selfie of just his face and torso, you were pleasantly surprised to find that you didn’t mind his spider features. His head and body was humanoid in shape, his skin incredibly pale and his very long, very straight hair was a shiny white. He had four eyes that were completely black with no sclera, those eyes sat in a row, with two larger in the centre and two smaller either side of those. His mouth was wide and in the photo he was grinning, showing that he had nothing but two large fangs in his upper jaw. His shoulders were broad and his torso was well built, with clearly defined muscles though he wasn’t overly muscular.

Swiping through his photos, you find another picture of him, this one being a full body shot which was clearly taken from a small distance. Here you could see his lower body where is torso ended and joined with his spider half, which looked large and bulbous, black in colour but covered in fine white hair which looked fuzzy. Attached to this body were eight long jointed legs which were also covered in fine white hairs. His legs looked as thick as tree trunks and you couldn’t be sure from looking at the photo but he looked huge.

This part of his body did make you apprehensive, and the more you look at it the worse you feel. Flicking between the two pictures you couldn’t decide if you were attracted to him or not. On one hand you found him incredibly beautiful, with his large pitch black eyes that you could easily get lost in and his gorgeous sleek looking hair and toned upper body. He also seemed sweet natured and had a lovely smile despite the fangs.

On the other hand, his spider lower half gave you the shivers and those long legs creeped you out. You cringed looking at them again and even thinking about those legs in motion made you shudder. Chewing on your lip you debated with yourself; you’d matched with him so obviously you had things in common and you didn’t have to jump into a relationship with him. You could always be friends first and see if it went anywhere. You just weren’t sure you could get over those eight legs…

Ping.

Startled, you look back at your phone which had gone to sleep at some point during your mental debate, and you see you have received another message from Silus.

[Sent: 3:16pm] Silus: I like your profile by the way, you’re very beautiful.... We must have a lot in common, I’ve been using this app for over a year now and I’ve never seen such a high percentage match...

Checking you see that he’s right, you’ve matched with him eighty-eight percent which was much higher than any other match you’d had and from everything you’d heard it was really rare to get a match that high. It was just your luck he had to be an arachnid, he seemed really nice too. Deciding to think further on it and make a decision later, you go back to writing, after all your novel wasn’t going to write itself.

A couple of hours later, feeling like you’ve made a lot of progress, you decide it’s time for some food. However a quick search around the kitchen reminds you that you’ve not been shopping in days. Take-away it is then.

Ping!

Frowning you see you’ve gotten another message from Silus, thinking he’s getting a little pushy, you open it to read.

[Sent: 5:30pm] Silus: Hey again, so I was thinking… I would understand if your not interested, many people don’t like arachnids…. I know a lot of people, especially humans are scared of my kind… But I hope you’ll give me a chance and see I’m not scary at all… or maybe your just busy or at work... Sorry...

Crap! You’d forgotten that your settings had been set to send read receipts. He knows you’ve read his messages and now thinks you’re ignoring him. You wonder how often that happens to him, he sounds so dejected and now you feel bad. He’d said in his earlier message that he’d been using the app for over a year so that meant he’d not had much luck finding someone. A bit like me then, thinking to yourself. Looking at his pictures again, you come to a decision.

[Sent: 5:32pm] You: Hi Silus, I’m good thanks and I was working… I am interested but to be honest I’ve never met an arachnid before and I’m unsure how I feel about it.

Silus: Oh my gosh, you replied :-) Thank you! It’s okay that you feel that way, at least you’re willing to give me a chance…

Silus: Lots of people are afraid of spiders and by extension spider monsters but honestly I wouldn’t hurt a fly…

Silus: …Well that’s a lie and probably a bad example, but really I’m not scary in the slightest…

Chuckling, you rather like Silus’s sense of humour though you’re not sure he was aiming to be funny. He was so sweet and seemed really surprised that you’d replied. Makes you wonder again how many people have ignored him just because of what he is.

You: Lol! I’m not scared of spiders exactly but they do make me uncomfortable… I’d like to get to know you though...

You: So… how are liking city life?

*************

You and Silus spent the rest of the evening getting to know each other. You learn that he works as a florist, that he’s renting a flat in the city centre and is flat sharing with a moth monster. Which did surprise you as you thought that their two species have a turbulent history. He asks what you do for work and then about the novel you’re currently writing.

The two of you end up talking long into the night and at some point you fall asleep still mid conversation. As soon as you wake up you're checking your phone for messages from Silus. You have two, the first answering the question you’d asked just before falling asleep and a second twenty minutes later where he says that he assumes you’ve falling asleep and to have sweet dreams.

Smiling to yourself, you send him a message confirming that you did in fact fall asleep and that you’re sorry about that. You then decide to get up and start your day. An hour later Silus is messaging you good morning and telling you not to worry about it. The two of you spend the rest of the morning chatting until he has to go to work. He messages again once he’s home from work and you spend the evening in the same manner as the night before.

The rest of the week followed the same pattern, work, eat and chat to Silus. By this point the two of you had swapped mobile numbers and were now communicating via both text and call. He had the loveliest voice and often during calls you forgot that you had to respond. Meeting in person wasn't a subject brought up until exactly one week after you’d first started chatting.

You were just sitting, eating lunch when you heard the ping of your mobile.

[Sent: 2:13pm] Silus: Afternoon gorgeous, are you free this evening? If you are, would you like to get a drink in town?

Taking a deep breath, you think it over, you really liked Silus and were pretty confident now that the two of you could really have something good together. Him being an arachnid no longer made you uncomfortable, at least in theory, but you were incredibly nervous. What if you saw him in person and you couldn’t see past those eight legs, you didn’t want to hurt him. Or what if when he saw you, he thought you weren’t as attractive in person. A previous date had told you that you looked thinner in your photos after all. You sigh, either way you had to know, for both your sakes.

You: Afternoon, I am free tonight and that would be lovely. Where were you thinking?

Silus: Great! :-D My flatmate works in this bar and restaurant which caters for folks like us, called The Bears Den, does that sound okay to you? It’s in city centre.

You: Yes of course! What time?

Silus: 6pm? Shall I come pick you up or would you rather we meet there?

You: 6 works for me. I’ll just meet you there, no point in you leaving the city centre to come collect me :-) I’ll get the bus, will only take me twenty minutes.

Silus: If you’re sure, I don’t mind the extra journey, I’d travel hours to pick you up ;-)

You: Lol, your so sweet but yes I’m sure. I’ll see you there at 6.

Silus: Alright then, I’ll meet you outside the bar. See you later gorgeous… can’t wait.

You: Me either! See you soon!

Checking the clock, you see that it was already 2:30pm and you had no idea what you were going to wear. Deciding your best bet would be to call your fashion-forward best friend and get her advice, your frustrated when she doesn’t answer. Oh well best go raid your wardrobe.

************

Your shaking with nerves by the time you get there and of course your twenty minutes early. Standing outside the bar feeling like an utter twit, you inspect the building. The outside is painted a glossy black and the name of the bar is painted in gold cursive above the very wide, very tall doors. It looked nice. Through the glass in the doors you could see the place already had a good number of patrons despite the early time.

You’re surprised and jump in shock when you hear your name spoken softly from behind you. Spinning around you come face to face with Silus, well more accurately you came face to stomach with Silus, because he was huge. Your breath catches in your throat and you gaze in astonishment at his form.

His large spider lower body was lowered to just inches off the ground and his long legs were arched upwards, their height reached to his human torso before coming back down to the ground. This close you could see that he had three claws at the end of each of those legs. Shifting your gaze back up, you took notice that he was wearing a smart midnight blue shirt before your attention was brought to his hands, which he was wringing togethering in nervousness. Looking to his face you could see that he looked wary but his mouth was turned up into a tentative smile.

It’s only when he quietly says your name and asks if you're alright that you realise that you’ve stood there just staring at him for the past two minutes. Giving yourself a mental shake you manage to give him a nod.

‘‘Yes! I’m good, thanks! Um... hi...’’ you giggle nervously.

‘‘Hi...’’ he replies, smile widening. ‘You still want to do this?’’

‘‘Yes, of course, sorry! Shall we go in?’’ You stammer.

Holding the door open for you, he shakes his head ‘‘No need to be sorry, I know I’m a lot to process.’’

‘‘Um... just a bit, I wasn’t expecting you to be so... big,’’ you stammer, as you pass under his arm into the bar.

‘‘Does it bother you?’’ He asks, as you make your way to the bar.

Shaking your head and giving him a smile over shoulder, you glance around the bar and see the vast majority of patrons are other non-humans. Behind the bar serving you spot a lizardfolk, who looks like a leopard gecko and a white tiger rakshasa. The rakshasa looks your way and raises a brow when he clocks Silus at your side. Making his way down the bar with a large grin on his face, you hear Silus let out a groan and suddenly he leans down to whisper in your ear, ‘‘He’s a harmless flirt.’’

‘‘What?’’ You stammer, but before he can say anything else the Rakshasa is standing in front of you and leaning over the bar to clasp Silus’s hand.

‘‘Ayaan,’’ Silus nods.

‘‘Silus,’’ rumbles the rakshasa, ‘‘It’s been awhile. Who’s your cute friend?’’ He says looking at you and giving you a wink.

Silus makes the introductions and as you give Ayaan your hand to shake, he leans down to kiss the back of your hand and gives you a cheeky grin. You understand now what Silus meant. Turning to Silus, Ayaan asks ‘‘Does Rowan know you’re out on a date?’’

‘‘Yes, and he’s upset he’s not here to see it’’ Silus replies, laughing. You give him a questioning look, but he just shakes his head at you and mouth’s later.

Turning back to Ayaan and ordering your drinks you head to a table towards the back of the bar where it’s quieter. Whilst you sit on a chair, Silus pushes the chair opposite you towards another table and lowers his spider body to the floor shifting his legs to a comfortable position. As you watch him do this, it occurs to you that your not feeling squeamish like you feared you might. In fact, your itching to lean over and see if those hairs are as fuzzy as they look. Giving Silus a smile, you see that he’s gazing just as intensely at you.

‘‘You’re very beautiful,’’ he says, swallowing nervously.

‘‘Thank you. So are you,’’ you reply, blushing.

‘‘No I’m not,’’ he says sadly, fixing you a look. ‘‘I look monstrous, I know that… but thank you for saying it anyway.”

Shaking your head you reply, ‘‘Yes, you are! You’re gorgeous, Silus…. at least you are to me, anyway,’’ you mumble shyly, reaching over the table to grasp his hand and squeezing it briefly.

Silus blushes prettily, looking at your hands shyly. Turning his hand around to clasp yours in a soft hold. ‘‘Thank you,’’ he says, sounding choked.

Hoping to distract him, you ask ‘‘So.. Is Ayaan a good friend of yours?’’

‘‘Oh yeah,’’ he replies shaking his head as if coming out of a daze, ‘‘I met him through Rowan.’’

‘‘And Rowan is? And why is he upset that he’s not here?’’ You ask raising a brow.

Chucking he replies, ‘‘Sorry, Rowans my flatmate and he’s upset because he thinks I’m probably going to make a fool of myself and he’s not here to see it…’’

‘‘Oh. Well... you haven’t, so he’s not missing anything,’’ you smile. “Is it his night off then?’’ You ask.

Shaking his head, ‘‘Nope, he would usually be working now but he’s gone home to West Oaks to attend one of his sister's wedding.’’

‘‘West Oaks? That’s where your from too right?’’ You ask.

Nodding, ‘‘Yeah... we grew up together, best friends since school. Neighbours too. We were both the youngest of all our many siblings so we spent our childhood bemoaning our lot in life.’’ He had a fond smile on his face.

‘‘You have a lot of siblings?’’ You ask sipping at your drink.

‘‘Yep! I’m one of twenty-six.’’ He grins.

‘‘No. Way.’’ you reply, sputtering.

Laughing, Silus nods ‘‘Arachnids tend to lay a lot of eggs... Moths do too, actually, Rowan is one of thirty.’’

‘‘Oh wow! No wonder the two of you banded together,’’ You say stunned.

‘‘Yeah, so when Ro decided he wanted to move to the city, I told him I was coming with,’’ Silus chuckles.

‘‘And.. do you like it here?’’

‘‘Yeah, it’s nice,’’ he tells you nodding. ‘‘Very different from living rurally, of course, and I miss the forest sometimes, but there’s a lot of good things about living in the city.’’

Before you can reply to that, Ayaan is suddenly at your table with a massive grin on his face, startling you both. Silus jerks so badly four of his legs flick out causing Ayaan to snicker loudly.

‘‘You two looked liked you were having fun, so I thought I’d offer table service’’ he says putting another two drinks down on the table. ‘‘Drink up,’’ he says and salutes before strolling back to the bar. You see the gecko behind the bar shaking his head at Ayaan’s antics, catching your eye he gives you an apologetic look before turning to serve another customer.

‘He’s a character,’’ You laughingly say, looking back at Silus.

‘‘That’s one word to describe him,’’ he chuckles jokingly.

You and Silus spent the rest of the evening talking and laughing, as he tells you stories from his childhood and teenage years where he and Rowan would get themselves into trouble. You tell him some of your own stories in return, telling him of the shenanigans that you and your best friend regularly got up to.

The two of you are so absorbed in each other that you don’t realise how late it has gotten until you hear a loud bellow from the otherside of the bar. Glancing around you see that the place is now packed full of boisterous patrons and that you have somehow missed the fact there is now a live band on stage. Over by the pool tables there is a large minotaur and a small goblin having a tussle over a pool cue and a very large orc with a dark scowl, who is obviously security is headed their way. Behind the bar both the gecko and Ayaan are looking harried and have been joined by a harpy and some type of avian.

You and Silus come to a mutual agreement that it’s time to call it a night. As Silus leads the way out of the bar, the other patrons quickly shift out of his way and a few of them stare openly, looking wary. Whilst you enjoy the fact that no one is in your personal space and you have room to move, you also feel sad that people look at him like he might turn around and eat them. You glare fiercely at one particular customer that’s standing staring rudely open mouthed, seeing your scowl they suddenly about-turn and run in the opposite direction.

Outside, you take in a deep breath of fresh air, glad to be out in the quiet. Turning to Silus you see that he’s watching you, a soft smile on his face.

‘‘Is it always like that in there?’’ You ask.

Shaking his head in the negative he replies, ‘‘Not really. It only tends to get that busy at weekends.’’

Nodding, you began speaking only to stop suddenly seeing that another orc, who looks like the double of the one inside, working the door watching you both with a sly grin. Smiling awkwardly, you and Silus start walking in a random direction.

‘‘So... what were you going to say?’’ He asks as he looks down at you.

‘‘Oh,’’ you smile, ‘‘Just that I had a really good time tonight.’’

‘‘So did I,’’ Silus blushes. “Perhaps we could do this again sometime?’’

‘‘Definitely,’’ you grin.

‘‘Would you.. like a ride home?’’

‘‘You drive?’’ You ask incredulously, looking at his spider lower half trying to work out the logistics of that.

‘‘No...’’ he chuckles. “I meant would you like to ride me?’’

Looking at him wide eyed, you suddenly break down snorting in laugher. Confused Silus raises a questioning brow.

‘‘What?’’ He asks completely befuddled.

Trying to calm yourself, you breath in deeply and ask, “Ride you? Talk about innuendo...’’ you grin.

Frowning it takes him a second to register. “Oh! I didn’t mean…’’ he groans. ‘I just meant… um… never mind,’’ he says, shaking his head with cheeks flushed red in embarrassment.

‘‘Maybe another time,’’ you smile eyeing his large lower body. ‘I’ll take a taxi tonight.’’ You nod towards the taxi rank across the road.

‘‘Right, well. I guess I have to say goodnight then,’’ he replies, smiling wistfully.

Nodding, you glance between his eyes and mouth, getting the hint he leans down and stops a hair width distance giving you the opportunity to change your mind. You don’t. Closing the distance between you, your eyes close as your lips meet his.

A quick peck leads to another, and then another, before you know it your tongue is in his mouth and you’re carefully exploring his mouth, being mindful with his fangs. One of his hands cradles your head as the other traces patterns on your back. Both your hands start on his shoulders before slowly roaming downwards. As you reach the point where his human torso meets his spider half, you softly stoke him there, feeling his soft hair tickle your hands. Silus suddening pulls away, panting harshly.

‘‘We have to stop,’’ he gasps.

You nod, agreeing and inhaling deeply.

‘‘Text me when you’re home?’’ He asks, searching your face.

Promising him that you would, you wish him goodnight moving quickly and getting in the first taxi. Silus gives a wave as the taxi pulls away and you see him watching you until your no longer in sight. Sitting back in the seat, you touch your fingertips to your lips.

Wow. That was some kiss.

——————————————————————

That’s all folks. If you enjoyed this, please reblog. Comments/likes are always appreciated too. Thanks!

My Masterlist

#spider monster #arachnid #monster/reader #monster/human #okcryptid #male monster #drider #interspecies relationship #exophilia

506 notes · View notes

hakuogakuen · 4 years

Text

Hakuouki SSL: Chapter 1 (Heisuke)

EDITED 8/1/20

Here is the translation for chapter 1 of Heisuke’s route! Primary translation by yuugs, and proofreading by kuririn, shizuumi, and dei-hime.

Translation begins under the cut! You can also find it at our new blogspot!

―― June ――

As the calendar turns to the next page, our uniforms turn to summer ones as well.

In April and May, I was so desperate to get used to high school life that the months just flew by….

Lately, I think I’ve finally made a place for myself in my life at Hakuo Academy.

Of course, it’s still an environment meant for boys so I still feel a little out of place. But thanks to my reliable friends and teachers, I’m living a fulfilling life at school——

Two months have passed since I began high school. It’s a clear and sunny morning in June. When I came to school, immediately after entering the building, the first thing I felt was an odd atmosphere.

As I climbed the stairs, just as I turned onto the landing——

Chizuru Yukimura: “Wah!?”

???: “Ah!”

I collided with the student rushing around the corner, and ended up falling on my butt.

Chizuru Yukimura: “Ow…"

Susumu Yamazaki: "Yukimura-kun? Sorry…”

Hajime Saitou: “I told you not to rush, Yamazaki. Are you alright, Yukimura?”

I looked up into two faces I recognized. Saitou-senpai was holding a textbook under one arm. He held out his hand to me.

Chizuru Yukimura: “Ah… yes, I’m alright."

Trying not to overthink it, I grabbed his hand and he pulled me upright.

Chizuru Yukimura: ”…Thank you for that.“

Chizuru Yukimura:: "I’m sorry, Yamazaki-senpai. I wasn’t being careful.”

As I bowed deeply to the two of them, I noticed a second year textbook had fallen to the floor.

Chizuru Yukimura: “Isn’t this your textbook, Yamazaki-senpai?”

Susumu Yamazaki: “O-Oh, did I drop it? …I didn’t notice. Thanks.”

Chizuru Yukimura: “……”

Something was off. Yamazaki’-senpai’s eyes had kind of a glazed look, and there were dark circles underneath them. Saitou-senpai also looked tired.

This seems…

[Are you alright?] or [Are you not getting enough sleep?]

Chizuru Yukimura: “Are you getting enough sleep?”

Susumu Yamazaki: “Well, um, that’s just how it is right now… It’s no big deal.”

Hajime Saitou: “Right. The real pain will begin next week or so."

Chizuru Yukimura: “…?”

They smiled bitterly, and then turned away. As they did…their gait seemed uneven. They said it wasn’t a big deal, but it didn’t look that way.

Chizuru Yukimura: "I wonder if they’re okay…”

I was getting more and more worried, but I didn’t have much time left before homeroom. Without another word, I hurried off to my classroom.

_ _

All morning, the school had been filled with chattering students. The hallway before the classrooms was especially lively. Maybe it was because classes hadn’t started yet. Having gotten to know them over the last two months, I exchanged greetings with my classmates in the hall as I headed to my classroom. On the way, I saw familiar faces in the distance and suddenly stopped in my tracks.

Chizuru Yukimura: “Heisuke-kun and Okita-senpai?"

I thought that was a freshman classroom. Why would two sophomores be there? It would be time for homeroom soon…

[Call out to them] or [Leave them alone]

Chizuru Yukimura: "Heisuke-kun, Okita-senpai!”

I called out to them, waving. Both of them noticed me and immediately came over.

Heisuke Toudou: “Yo, Chizuru. G’morning!”

Chizuru Yukimura: “Morning, Heisuke-kun. Did you guys just come back from practice?"

Souji Okita: "Yep. Been working like dogs all morning.”

They were part of the kendo club, which often met in the morning. On days when there was morning training, Heisuke-kun and I couldn’t walk to school together. I got a bit lonely those days… But seeing him trying his hardest made me happy.

Chizuru Yukimura: “But why are you guys here? This is a first year classroom…”

Heisuke Toudou: “That’s… well, the thing is… We were just passing by…”

Souji Okita: “Why not be honest? This guy came by ‘cause he was worried about you.”

Heisuke Toudou: “Ah! Hey, Souji!”

Chizuru Yukimura: “Worried…about me?” I blinked in surprise. Heisuke-kun rubbed his head and mumbled.

Heisuke Toudou: “I mean, you’re surrounded by a bunch of guys, right? I’m worried they might pick on you or something.”

Chizuru Yukimura: “No, no, I’m alright. I’ve made a lot of friends in my class these past new months.”

Souji Okita: “There you go. Yet here he comes anyway, worrying his little head off about you. Pretty stalker-ish vibes, don’t you think?"

Heisuke Toudou: "W-Who you calling a stalker! I’m not anything like one!”

I smiled at Okita-senpai’s and Heisuke-kun’s bickering.

Chizuru Yukimura: “Anyway, guys, I think the bell’s about to ring.”

Heisuke Toudou: "Oh, crap! You’re right!”

Souji Okita: “Well, we’ll probably see you at lunch later.”

Chizuru Yukimura: “Yup!”

After seeing them off, I went back to enter the classroom…

When I did, I took out my textbook and notebook to get ready for class. The bell rang as soon as I’d finished, and I heard the sound of the door opening.

Sanosuke Harada: “Take your seats, guys. Homeroom’s starting.”

As Harada-sensei came in, everyone rushed to their seats.

Classmate A: “Stand! Bow!”

Sanosuke Harada: “All right, morning!”

Everyone in class: “Good morning!”

Sanosuke Harada: “Time for attendance…is what I was going to say, but it seems like everyone’s here. Raise a hand if not.”

Ryuunosuke Ibuki: “You can’t do that if you’re not here…”

Ibuki-kun startled me by suddenly speaking up. A laugh escaped me before I could stop myself. Harada-sensei did make jokes like this at times. He really was a friendly, kind teacher.

Sanosuke Harada: “Now then, you all started school two months ago, and now it’s June. With that being the case…Though you might already know this, our school’s midterm exams start in two weeks! Make sure to study diligently, you guys. Put your feet up and slack off, and who knows what horrors you might be tempting?” Harada-sensei smirked as if he knew something we didn’t.

Ryuunosuke Ibuki: "Horrors…?”

Sanosuke Harada: “If you think this’ll be the same as tests back in middle school, you’ll be in for a bad time. As you all know, Hakuo Academy has a teacher that’s much more passionate about educating its students than other schools do.”

Chizuru Yukimura: “Passionate about educating, meaning–”

Ryuunosuke Ibuki: “…It’s Hijikata-sensei, isn’t it?”

Sanosuke Harada: “Well, so it goes. Following a certain teacher’s suggestion, there’ll be penalties for students with lower scores. Those scoring less than 50% in a subject will receive a special homework assignment, and must clean all the school’s windows.“

Everyone in class: ”……“

As Harada-sensei with his explanation, everyone in class got paler and paler.

Sanosuke Harada: “Below 30% gets you cleaning corridors on top of the additional homework… And below that, the punishments get extra special.”

Chizuru Yukimura: ”'Special,’ he says…“

Sanosuke Harada: "Below 20% means doing a problem set, weeding the school yard, and a week of additional classes!”

Classmate A: “Whaaaaat?!”

Sanosuke Harada: “Sorry, but it’s already set in stone. Don’t like it? Then study like there’s no tomorrow. I don’t think anyone should get lower than 50%. If you study then you’ll be in the clear, right?”

While listening to Harada-sensei, I recalled what happened this morning. The reason why Saitou-senpai and Yamazaki-senpai seemed so off was probably this.

Chizuru Yukimura: “……”

While I didn’t mind studying, there was no way I’d want extra homework.

Ryuunosuke Ibuki: “What would that guy do to me if I got myself stuck in supplemental classes...?!” Ibuki’s face drained of all color, and he hung his head.

This was going to be difficult. I would have to brace myself… The midterm exams would begin the week after next. Although I thought June’s hardships were over, the real battle was just around the corner.

_ _

After morning classes had finished, it was finally time for lunch. ‘Am I worrying too much about the tests? I feel kind of weird today,’ I thought.

Chizuru Yukimura: “I should go to the cafeteria for the time being.”

Heisuke-kun and Okita-senpai were probably waiting for me…After quickly putting my school supplies away, I headed for the cafeteria.

For Hakuo Academy students, there were essentially three ways to get lunch. Some students brought a bento from home, and some bought their lunches at the school store. But the most popular lunch choice was to buy a meal from the cafeteria.

Chizuru Yukimura: “Wow…”

The school lunches were all delicious and affordable. It was no wonder they were so popular. I usually brought a bento, but sometimes I didn’t feel like having one. Since it was so popular, it was jam-packed by the time I got there.

Genzaburou Inoue: “Hey, you there! Line up properly! There are plenty of meals to go around...Hey now…! Don’t argue over the rice! Remember your manners and share!”

The beloved school chef, Inoue-san, was also managing the cafeteria. It looked like he was doing a good job sorting the students out, as usual.

Chizuru Yukimura: “Heisuke-kun isn’t here yet, huh…?” ‘I’ll get in the way if I stand and wait here. What should I do?’ the moment the thought passed through my mind...

???: “You’re in the way. Move.”

Chizuru Yukimura: “Huh…?”

A voice rang out from the other side of the crowd. Immediately afterwards, the masses parted, splitting into two. Imperious as ever, the figure which emerged between them was...

Chizuru Yukimura: “K-Kazama-senpai…”

Amagiri-senpai and Shiranui-senpai pushed away annoyed students left and right, creating an empty clearing in the otherwise crowded cafeteria.

Chikage Kazama: “Chizuru…? For us to meet here of all places… How serendipitous. As I thought, there is a strong bond of fate between us. Don’t you agree?”

Chizuru Yukimura: "Wha–”

Kyou Shiranui: “Is it? You go to the same school with the same cafeteria. Wouldn’t it be weirder if you didn’t see each other?”

Kyuuju Amagiri: “It is strange, now that you mention it... That you have never encountered each other here until today is rather more mysterious.”

Chikage Kazama: “……”

Kyou Shiranui: “Don’t sound like much of a bond to me.”

Chikage Kazama: “……No matter. Whatever the peanut gallery says, rest assured that our meeting today was destiny. As such, I will have your lunch prepared. Order whatever you wish.”

Chizuru Yukimura: “Huh?!”

Chikage Kazama: “What’s wrong? There’s no need to hold back. Even if you want everything on the menu, I won’t mind.”

Chizuru Yukimura: “That’s not what I’m worried about…! At any rate, treating me to so much is unfair to you!”

Chikage Kazama: “That modesty is a virtue of yours, but I insist that it’s fine. ....Or is it something else? Does the cafeteria food not suit your palate?”

Chizuru Yukimura: “T-That’s not the case at all! It’s delicious! It’s just that……”

As I shook my head, the number of people waiting for food was increasing. Maybe because of how we stood out in the middle, other students couldn’t get in line…The people who were stuck around us were getting angry. ‘W-What should I do…?’ I was so conflicted that I could feel tears starting to form in my eyes. Then–

???: “You again, Kazama!!” An ear-splitting yell descended upon us.

Toshizou Hijikata: “Just what do you think you’re doing, harassing the female student in the middle of the cafeteria? Can’t you see she’s about to cry!?”

Chikage Kazama: “Ha. How ludicrous… You say that as if I were the one who made her cry.”

Kyou Shiranui: “…You say it, Amagiri.”

Kyuuju Amagiri: “Well, I can say we never intended in the slightest to make her cry…”

Toshizou Hijikata: “Then why is she holding back tears? …And why is everyone packed like sardines in here? Out with it.”

Chikage Kazama: “My wife’s eyes are full of tears due to her gratitude for my superb generosity. As to the cafeteria, it just happens to be crowded today. To falsely accuse a single student of being responsible is unbefitting of a teacher such as yourself.”

Toshizou Hijikata: “There’s a suspicious clearing around you and you only! Put two and two together, and it can only be your fault!”

Hijikata-sensei and Kazama-senpai always fought like cats and dogs, and their terrible relationship was infamous at school. Sparks flew the moment they met, and it only ever grew more and more extreme.

Chizuru Yukimura: “……”

When I saw Hijikata-sensei coming earlier, I thought everything would be sorted. It relieved me from the bottom of my heart… But far from improving anything, the situation seemed like it was only going to get worse.

Chizuru Yukimura: “…W-What do I do…?”

[Stand and watch] or [Forcibly break them up]

‘Trying to interfere from the sidelines may make things even more complicated.’ Thinking that, I decided to keep my mouth shut for the time being. But in the end…

Toshizou Hijikata: “Looks like I was right! It doesn’t seem like she asked for your 'superb generosity’!”

Chikage Kazama: “That is due to a difference in values. It seems that a lowlife like you has yet to be able to understand my excellent resourcefulness…”

...There was no sign of the dispute stopping anytime soon. While I squirmed on the sidelines, someone called out to me from the side.

Heisuke Toudou: “Chizuru! Sorry we’re late! Class went on longer than normal."

Chizuru Yukimura: "Heisuke-kun, Okita-senpai…!”

Souji Okita: “What the? What’s all the fuss about? Why’s it so crowded here?”

Chizuru Yukimura: “Right, actually—”

After I briefly explained the situation, Heisuke-kun and Okita-senpai looked amazed. While Hijikata-sensei and Kazama-senpai glared at each other with murderous intent, Heisuke-kun and Okita-senpai looked at the pair and sighed.

Souji Okita: “How about we leave them to it and head off? If you don’t hurry, you won’t get to eat.”

Heisuke Toudou: “Right, right. Our lunch break’s gonna end! I’m already hungry too…”

Chizuru Yukimura: “Oh? …O-Okay…” ‘Would that be alright…?’

Genzaburou Inoue: “Hey, Toshi-san and Kazama-kun, what’re you doing!? You’re holding up the line for everyone!!”

The teachers’ confrontation weighed on my mind, but...Mr. Inoue shouted to rein in the situation. Hearing his booming voice, I turned around and left the pair.

Souji Okita: “Chizuru, over here.”

With our meal sets on our trays, we found Okita-senpai sitting at an empty table. I’d chosen meal set 'A’. Drinking a cup of warm miso soup always relaxed me.

Heisuke Toudou: “Ahh, it’s so good…! I worked out so much this morning, I couldn’t wait for lunch!”

Chizuru Yukimura: “Good work with training this morning, you guys!”

Heisuke Toudou: “I’m sorry I couldn’t walk with you to school because of that...But in the end, morning’s the best time of day to be working up a sweat.”

Souji Okita: “Well, it gets hot during the day this time of year, so I get sluggish when school ends.”

Heisuke Toudou: “You said it… But lately we got club members who study in the middle of morning practice. You can’t focus on training if you do that.”

Souji Okita: “The entire school’s been on edge. I don’t know whether it’s the tests or the punishments, but it’s a real pain.”

Heisuke Toudou: “Well, the one who’s most on edge would be Hijikata-sensei.”

Chizuru Yukimura: “Speaking of which… You’re both in Class 2-1, so isn’t Hijikata-sensei your homeroom teacher?”

Souji Okita: “Yep. He’s all busy ruining the mood at school and being pissy about it, what with embodying the root of all evil and all, and causing a good amount of trouble."

Chizuru Yukimura: "The… The root of all evil…?”

Heisuke Toudou: "I mean, earlier, the reactions from everyone felt different than usual.”

Chizuru Yukimura: “…Now that you mention it…”

You could call it a kind of insecurity hanging over everyone… There was no mistaking that the air felt heavier than usual, at least to me. Midterms were about to begin, after all. ‘I wonder if the tension is spreading…’

Heisuke Toudou: “Oops, we ended up talking about the tests even though I wanted to forget about it for lunch.”

Chizuru Yukimura: “Ah… Sorry about that, Heisuke-kun.”

Souji Okita: “No, there’s no reason for you to apologize. This is his fault.”

Heisuke Toudou: “That’s right—wait, no, it’s not! You’re the one who brought up the tests, right!?”

Even though Heisuke-kun shot a disgruntled look at Okita-senpai, he heaved a deep sigh right after.

Heisuke Toudou: “Anyway, it’d be better if the tests just, like, disappeared…”

Chizuru Yukimura: “Don’t say that. We should study hard anyway.”

Heisuke Toudou: “N-No, that… Well, I know that, but…”

Souji Okita: “……”

While Heisuke-kun faltered in his mumbling, Okita-senpai looked at him and grinned. At some point, he snapped a picture before I’d even realized he’d taken out his phone.

Heisuke Toudou: “Whoa!? Souji, what’re you taking pictures of!?”

Souji Okita: “You’re not photogenic at all, are you?”

Heisuke-kun slumped his shoulders, and Okita-senpai grinned at him, eyes full of laughter.

I said to them…

[Is it that hard?] or [The rules may be too strict…] or [Studying daily is important.]

These two already went through the tests last year... I became uneasy listening to them, and afraid to ask about it.

Chizuru Yukimura: "Uh, are the tests in Hakuo Academy really that difficult...?"

Heisuke Toudou: "Hm? Well, they're definitely no cakewalk… But you'll be fine! Besides, compared to the mess I'm in, those punishments look like an absolute treat..."

Souji Okita: "Unlike everyone else, Heisuke here'll receive even greater punishments if he scores low."

Chizuru Yukimura: "Huh?"

Heisuke Toudou: "H-Hey, man, don't go exposing me!"

Chizuru Yukimura: "Did something happen, Heisuke-kun...?"

Heisuke Toudou: "......"

Souji Okita: "So what happened was, we had this pop quiz on classical lit, and Heisuke tanked it."

Heisuke Toudou: "Yeah... And Hijikata-sensei teaches the classical literature course."

Souji Okita: "Hell hath no fury like Hijikata-sensei scorned. You could practically see the steam shooting out his ears. I wish you could've seen it."

Heisuke Toudou: "About half of it was Souji's fault for fanning the flames..."

Chizuru Yukimura: "What did you do, Okita-senpai..."

Souji Okita: "It's not like I did anything major. I think I just acted the way I always do, honestly."

Heisuke Toudou: "......"

Souji Okita: "And then, in his fury, Hijikata-sensei laid down some conditions for Heisuke. If he scores less than 50% on the next test, he'll be prohibited from club activities for a fixed time on top of the other punishments."

Chizuru Yukimura: "N-No way... But the kendo club is so important to you, Heisuke-kun. You have to do well..."

Heisuke Toudou: "That's right! I really love kendo, and I definitely don't wanna have to stop doing it. But I only ever barely pass the classical lit tests... Honestly, I might not even make it this time."

Chizuru Yukimura: "D-Don't give up, Heisuke-kun! You won't get any penalties with a decent score."

Heisuke Toudou: "...Yeah. I know that, but..." Heisuke-kun sighed deeply and started eating his beef bowl in silence, marking the end of that conversation.

Souji Okita: "That's a grim look you're sporting, Heisuke. It feels like you already got the punishment before the tests have even started."

Chizuru Yukimura: "......"

‘I wonder if Heisuke-kun will be alright...’ While eating the rest of my lunch, I didn't have the time to worry about him anymore.

As the days went by, the older students, who already knew how severe the penalties were, grew more and more desperate. Seeing them also made us grow more anxious as well, as freshmen. The strange tension that enveloped Hakuo Academy just kept growing stronger.

And then…

―― 7 days until the tests ――

While we studied for our tests day after day, Harada-sensei looked around at our exhausted faces and grinned from his podium.

Sanosuke Harada: “Looking good, guys. It looks like you lot finally understand how serious we are about our tests.”

Ryuunosuke Ibuki: “What does he mean, 'looking good’? This is just agony…”

Sanosuke Harada: “Hey, don’t say that. It’s not like I don’t get what you’re going through. Just think of this as a rite of passage. This is what you signed up for enrolling into Hakuo Academy. There’s no turning back now. Anyway, just do your best.”

Everyone in class: ”……“

What he said was irrefutably correct. Everyone lost the will to argue, and went silent.

_ _

―― 6 days until the tests ――

That day, I ran into Kazama-senpai in the corridor without expecting to. Naturally, Amagiri-senpai and Shiranui-senpai were shadowing him, as usual.

Chikage Kazama: “Chizuru. Less than a week remains until testing begins. Are you studying properly?”

Chizuru Yukimura: "I am. I’m working at my own pace, and it’s going fairly well, I think…”

'How about you, Kazama-senpai?’ ...I felt like I didn’t even need to ask. Why? Because he seemed plenty calm, a smug smile spreading across his face.

Chikage Kazama: “These students growing so flustered over mere high school tests is truly unsightly. Don’t you think so?”

Chizuru Yukimura: “Uh… T-That’s…”

Kyou Shiranui: "Uh, no, 'cause high school students are bound to freak out over high school tests. Rather than unsightly, it’s just normal.

Kyuuju Amagiri: ”…Kazama-sama. If we do not depart soon, you will be late for your next lesson.“

Chikage Kazama: “Hmph. Whether or not I attend any classes, there’s not a single thing the test will cover that I won’t understand… But very well. Let us show our faces in class for today. Well then, I bid you farewell.”

I was left standing alone in the hallway, overwhelmed as Kazama-senpai swaggered off with an arrogant look on his face.

_ _

―― 5 days until the tests ――

Chizuru Yukimura: “Good morning, Saitou-senpai.”

Hajime Saitou: “Is that you, Yukimura? Morning.”

Chizuru Yukimura: “You still have disciplinary committee work in the mornings even though we only have five days until the tests. That must be hard…”

Hajime Saitou: “No, it’s important to accumulate knowledge on a regular basis in order to study properly. So there’s no point in panicking just before a test.”

Just what you’d expect from Saitou-senpai…

Hajime Saitou: “However, all sports and culture clubs have suspended their activities for the tests. So since Heisuke’s not with you, he must be late. One strike for him.”

Chizuru Yukimura: “N-No, he’s on class duty today, so he should’ve arrived before me!”

Hajime Saitou: “Come to think of it, he might’ve passed by a short while ago…”

Looking at him more closely, I could see the dark bags under Saitou-senpai’s eyes. On the surface, he looked as dignified as ever, but his grip on his pen looked a little shaky, too. Perhaps Saitou-senpai was staying up late studying too…

_ _ ―― 4 days until the tests ――

On Saturday, I was studying in my room, when suddenly my cell phone rang.

Chizuru Yukimura: “Okita-senpai…?”

‘A message with a picture attached, as usual. Let’s have a look…’

He’s making a peace sign at the camera, with an odd-looking plushie hanging from his hand.

“I won a toy that I thought you’d like.

I’ll give it to you at school.

I’ll bring it up to your classroom for you, even.”

Chizuru Yukimura: “……”

‘What kind of tastes does he think I have? Moreover…’

Chizuru Yukimura: “Even though it’s a Saturday with tests right around the corner, he still finds time to fool around!”

_ _

―― 3 days until the tests ――

It was Sunday morning.

I decided to do a little sweeping by the front door for a change of pace. At that moment, Heisuke-kun appeared, staggering.

Chizuru Yukimura: “Heisuke-kun?! Are you okay…!?”

Heisuke Toudou: “Chizuru… Mornin’…”

He had terrible, dark bags under his eyes and his eyes were hollow. He was so exhausted that he couldn’t even walk straight.

Heisuke Toudou: “I-I’m on the verge of falling asleep… So I’m running a lap around the block. Must…stay…awake…”

Chizuru Yukimura: “But if you don’t sleep a little, you won’t last until the test!"

Heisuke Toudou: "No way! I’m not done studying yet! I’ll totally flunk it!! Don’t stop me, Chizuru! Don’t stop me! I’m not ready to die yet!”

Chizuru Yukimura: “Wait, Heisuke-kun! A whole lap around the block is too much no matter how you look at it—”

I tried to stop him, but he’d already run off... While watching his disappearing figure staggering in zigzags down the road, I could only pray for his safety.

_ _

―― 2 days until the tests ――

During recess.

I gathered my class’s printouts and brought them to the staff room…

Toshizou Hijikata: “……”

Hijikata-sensei, looking particularly annoyed, was sighing deeply. He looked no better than the students, just as exhausted by pre-test frenzy.

Chizuru Yukimura: “Is something wrong, Hijikata-sensei?”

Toshizou Hijikata: “Those guys are so tired from cramming that they sleep through my classes. Because of them, I’m screaming my lungs out every morning. Classes are a key part of test preparations. Their priorities are all backwards!”

Chizuru Yukimura: “…You’ve been working really hard…”

I think they just stay up all night studying out of fear of punishment… Even though I understood Hijikata-sensei’s concerns, I couldn’t help but smile wryly.

―― At last, the day before the test ――

Chizuru Yukimura: “Finally, it’s tomorrow…”

At the end of the school day, while I was putting away my textbooks, I glanced to to the desk beside mine…

Ryuunosuke Ibuki: “……”

Ibuki-kun sat here, engrossed in his studies, showing no signs of getting up to go home.

Chizuru Yukimura: “Ibuki-kun, aren’t you going home?”

Ryuunosuke Ibuki: “Ah… I wouldn’t be able to study even if I did. Since Serizawa-san’s there...”

Ibuki-kun often mentions him when we talk. It seems like he doesn’t get along with this ‘Serizawa-san’. With him looking so cornered, I could only bring a forced smile to my lips.

Chizuru Yukimura: “Do your best.”

Ryuunosuke Ibuki: “You too.”

He gave a little smile, and then, as if he were clinging onto his desk, dived back into his books for the test.

At that moment…

Chizuru Yukimura: “?”

I noticed my phone vibrating in my pocket and took it out. A message notification came up on my screen.

Chizuru Yukimura: “Oh, it’s from Sen-chan.”

Sen is my friend who attends Shimabara Girls’ High School not too far away from my academy.

—–

Sub: Will you be okay for the test?

Chizuru-chan, are you going to be okay for the tests?

I can’t take it anymore~!

I just want to run away from it all~!

But, after we get through these midterms, we definitely need to hang out!

I will survive them on your moral support, Chizuru-chan!!

—–

Chizuru Yukimura: “I see. They have tests at the same time as us. Shimabara High is a sister school to Hakuo Academy, come to think of it…”

“Jeez, Sen-chan…”

Having read her message, I decided to reply right away. ‘But what should I write?’

[I’m looking forward to it!] or [Let’s concentrate on studying!]

Chizuru Yukimura: “'I’m looking forward to it!’ …and send.”

I think it’s easier to persevere when there’s a prize waiting for you after all the struggle.

A short while after I sent it, Sen-chan replied.

—–

RE: Will you be okay for the test?

Definitely!

Let’s both do our best!

—–

Chizuru Yukimura: “Hehe…”

I could feel my motivation grow with Sen-chan cheering for me.

“Well, I should go over my notes one last time before the test…”

I finished getting ready and took my bag, leaving the classroom.

Then…

As I headed towards the school entrance, something crossed my field of vision.

Chizuru Yukimura: "Heisuke-kun?"

Heisuke Toudou: "......"

I saw him stagger down the hallway, his body swaying left and right. Even though I called out to him, he didn't seem to notice me.

Chizuru Yukimura: "I should go after him!"

I followed him as he staggered to his classroom.

Chizuru Yukimura: "Excuse me..."

Even though it was probably empty after school, entering the senior students' classroom still made me nervous. But fortunately, the only one left there was Heisuke-kun.

Chizuru Yukimura: "Heisuke-kun, are you okay...?"

Heisuke Toudou: "Chizuru?... What are you doing here? Uh oh. Am I dreaming...?"

Chizuru Yukimura: "N-No! It's not a dream!" I hurried to stop him as he began to slap his cheeks hard.

Heisuke Toudou: "Then, why are you here in my classroom? Isn't that weird?"

Chizuru Yukimura: "I saw you earlier in the hallway, and followed you here. Anyway, why haven't you gone home yet, Heisuke-kun...?"

Heisuke Toudou: "If I go home, I’ll fall asleep...so I'll go back after I study for a bit..."

Whatever he said, he clearly wasn’t getting enough sleep. If he didn’t rest at least a little bit, he would collapse before the test the next day...

Chizuru Yukimura: "Heisuke-kun. How about you take a break, even if it's just for a little while...? If you fall asleep during the test, don't you think all your hard work up until now will go to waste?"

Heisuke Toudou: "Ugh... B-But, if I fall asleep now, I definitely won't be able to wake up in the morning!"

Chizuru Yukimura: "Hmm… Well, I'll wake you up then."

Heisuke Toudou: "Wha...!? I'm grateful, Chizuru, but wouldn’t that be annoying for you?"

Chizuru Yukimura: "Not at all. I’ll study while you sleep."

Heisuke Toudou: "R-Really...?"

Chizuru Yukimura: "If it's possible, I think it’d be best if you lay down in the infirmary beds."

Heisuke Toudou: "N-No, I can't do that! If I lay down in a bed now, I'll end up sleeping forever..."

Chizuru Yukimura: "What are you going to do then?"

He fell silent for a moment, as if he were thinking about something. Before long, he raised his face and looked me in the eyes with a serious expression.

Heisuke Toudou: "Hey... Chizuru, Can you do me a favor?"

Chizuru Yukimura: "A favor?"

Heisuke Toudou: "Yeah. I mean, it’s—"

Chizuru Yukimura: "...Wha...?!"

Heisuke-kun whispered in my ear a request I didn't expect at all.

Chizuru Yukimura: "N-No matter what...?"

Heisuke Toudou: "No matter what!!"

Chizuru Yukimura: "...Uh..."

The suggestion was something really embarrassing... But, if that was all I had to do to help him do his best… Despite my hesitation, I nodded.

At that…

(CG get!°˖✧◝(⁰▿⁰)◜✧˖°)

Heisuke-kun seemed completely at ease as he used my lap as a pillow.

Chizuru Yukimura: "...Heisuke-kun, is your uniform getting wrinkled?"

Heisuke Toudou: "Don’t worry about that! It's so comfortable to sleep like this!!"

Chizuru Yukimura: "Come on..."

Heisuke Toudou: "Ah. But I wonder if your skirt will get messed up..."

Chizuru Yukimura: "It’s fine."

Heisuke-kun's sleep was much more important than something like that. It's just that, if people saw us like this here, it'd be incredibly embarrassing…

Heisuke Toudou: "Anyway, please wake me up in about an hour...”

Chizuru Yukimura: "Sure. I got it."

Heisuke Toudou: "Still… It's been so long since we did this sort of thing. I’m feeling really nostalgic."

Chizuru Yukimura: "It's been about 10 years since you last used my lap as a pillow, huh? You've always been running around, full of energy since then. When I first moved in, you reached out to me..."

"......"

He was always energetic. Even if he ran around every day with all his might, he was always smiling. Seeing him be so tired was really unusual.

Chizuru Yukimura: "Hey, Heisuke-kun..."

[Why are you working so hard?] or [Please don’t overdo it.]

Chizuru Yukimura: “...I know it's the day before the test, but why are you working so hard?”

Heisuke Toudou: "......" He blinked slowly, and answered in a soft voice, "...I don’t want the penalties, no matter what. Especially for club activities. Practicing before and after school is really hard, but unbelievably fun at the same time. I... Up until now, there hasn’t been anything I’ve been more absorbed in than kendo. That's how fun it is for me.”

Chizuru Yukimura: “You really love kendo, huh?”

Heisuke Toudou: “Yeah. We’re really close to the inter-school tournament. I really don’t want to be forced to take a break right now.”

Chizuru Yukimura: “I see...”

Heisuke-kun had always been single-minded when it comes to the things he loved. He loved kendo more than anything he'd gotten into before. So it’s only natural that he was trying his hardest at it.

Chizuru Yukimura: “...Heisuke-kun, take a little break now. But... after you wake up later, try your best.”

Heisuke Toudou: “Yeah, leave it to me...!”

With a peaceful smile, he closed his eyes.

Chizuru Yukimura: "Yeah, I'm rooting for you!"

Heisuke Toudou: "......" With a slow, deep breath, he fell asleep. As he did, I watched his sleeping face. I was glad to catch a glimpse of him looking so unguarded.

Chizuru Yukimura: “You must really love kendo, huh? Sleep well, Heisuke-kun..."

I hoped that this little break would clear away some of his exhaustion. Thinking that, I looked away and began writing in my textbook.

Heisuke Toudou: “Aaah...! I slept great!!”

When I woke him up at the time we promised, Heisuke-kun had a great big stretch.

Heisuke Toudou: "Thanks, Chizuru! I feel like that really cleared up my head!"

Chizuru Yukimura: "Really? That's good then..."

Heisuke Toudou: “Well, I’m gonna be studying with all my might from now on. I’ll work hard until the sun goes down. After that, we'll head home together... Can you wait until then?”

Chizuru Yukimura: “Yeah, of course.”

Heisuke Toudou: “Alright!! I’m getting more and more fired up!!”

Chizuru Yukimura: “Hehe...”

If just doing this much made him so happy, I'd wait for him no matter how long it took. Heisuke-kun leaned forward in his chair, studying frantically. I borrowed an empty desk, and resumed studying beside him.

The day of the test had finally arrived.

It was time for the real thing at last. I studied as much as I possibly could, but still felt a bit anxious...

The tests had finally started.

Chizuru Yukimura: "Seeing Heisuke-kun yesterday gave me a lot more motivation..."

‘I'll power through today's test as well!’

[Minigame Pass]

Chizuru Yukimura: "I might've actually aced that...?!"

I was able to answer the questions pretty smoothly. So much so that I worried whether I'd overlooked an easy question somewhere…

Chizuru Yukimura: "I wonder how Heisuke-kun did...?"

Right then, I was far more worried about his results than my own.

Then, several days later…

Chizuru Yukimura: "Oh!"

My name didn't appear on the list of people to receive penalties.

Chizuru Yukimura: "What a relief... How did Heisuke-kun do?"

I couldn't take my mind off of his results. I let out a sigh and headed for the sophomores' classrooms to go check on that.

Then, just as I was going to climb the stairs, Heisuke-kun popped up out of nowhere.

Heisuke Toudou: "Oh, Chizuru! How'd it go?!"

Chizuru Yukimura: "Heisuke-kun, how'd it go?!"

Both: "......."

Chizuru Yukimura: "Hehe."

It seemed that we both came to ask the other about their results. We smiled at the irony as I started to speak.

Chizuru Yukimura: "Mine went well... How about yours?"

Heisuke Toudou: "Same here! Mine went well too! I sailed through them without a hitch!"

Chizuru Yukimura: "That's wonderful...!"

Heisuke Toudou: "I wanted to tell you this since the start: Thanks, Chizuru. It's definitely thanks to you that I managed to dodge the penalties somehow! With how much I studied my butt off, I'll game to my heart's content from now on!"

Chizuru Yukimura: "......Huh? What about your club activities...?"

Heisuke Toudou: "I'll do my best on those as well! I love kendo after all!"

Chizuru Yukimura: "Y-Yeah..."

Heisuke Toudou: "But I also love gaming! I toiled away studying for the sake of my club activities. I gotta let loose!!"

Chizuru Yukimura: "......"

Heisuke Toudou: "......"

Chizuru Yukimura: "Well. There's no helping it."

Heisuke Toudou: "Heheh..."

He laughed sheepishly. He'd worked so hard up till today and he was so happy now. I couldn't find it in myself to be angry at him any more.

Heisuke Toudou: "Hey, so, if you don't have any plans for now, d'you wanna head home with me today?"

Chizuru Yukimura: "Yeah. But you don't have to..."

Heisuke Toudou: "'’Kay, let's stop by somewhere on the way back. Consider it my thanks for lending me your lap as a pillow the other day. My treat."

Chizuru Yukimura: "I-I shouldn't have..."

Heisuke Toudou: "You didn't do anything wrong! I'm saying you should take this as me thanking you!"

Chizuru Yukimura: "O-Okay..."

I nodded at him, and he broke out into a delighted grin.

Heisuke Toudou: "Right, I'll go meet you at your classroom after classes finish, then!"

I saw him off as he left the way he came, his footsteps clattering as he ran down the hallway…

Chizuru Yukimura: "I'm so glad..." I let out another sigh of relief.

___

At last, the tests were over, and the results had been announced…The tension gradually seeped out of the school, and everything slowly went back to normal.

After school, after the test results were announced…I was on my way out of the school building to return home when…

Isami Kondou: “……”

Chizuru Yukimura: “Just now…was that Kondou-sensei?”

Kondou-sensei went around to the back of the school. When I saw that, I paused. ‘There isn’t anything over there, so where is he going…?’ I thought it was kind of mysterious. And so, egged on by my curiosity, I jogged after Kondou-sensei. I went further behind the school… I’d never set foot back here before. After reaching his destination, Kondou-sensei suddenly stopped.

Isami Kondou: “……”

‘What is this place…?’ Towering in front of me was an old gate, and my eyes widened. ‘To think there was such a place here, right on academy campus…’

Isami Kondou: “……”

Chizuru Yukimura: “Um…”

Isami Kondou: “Hm… Yukimura-kun? Why are you here?”

Chizuru Yukimura: “I’m sorry. I saw you heading this way, and curiosity got the better of me…”

Isami Kondou: “Ahh, so that’s what it was.”

Kondou-sensei smiled in understanding, and turned his gaze back towards the gate. The old wooden door was shut tightly, looking like it hadn’t been opened in a long time. It had been two months since I began studying at Hakuo Academy, but I never knew such a place existed until now.

Chizuru Yukimura: “Um, Kondou-sensei. What is this place…?”

Isami Kondou: “‘The Shieikan.’”

Chizuru Yukimura: "Huh?”

Isami Kondou: “…That’s what it was called, at least. There used to be a swordplay dojo here by that name.”

Chizuru Yukimura: “Used to be?”

Isami Kondou: “Yes. As you can see, it’s closed now. There are no students here; there’s no one at all. But the teachings of that dojo are certainly still being passed down… That’s what I believe.”

There was a look in his eyes; almost as if he were lost in a different time, far from the present. I got the feeling that this must’ve been a very important place to Kondou-sensei.

Isami Kondou: “I always come here whenever I want to return to my roots…This place, the Shieikan, is Hakuo Academy’s starting point.”

Kondou-sensei put his hand on the place where I expected the sign must have once hung, and his eyes shut, lost in nostalgia.

…'Shieikan.’ As if to confirm the word, I mouthed it to myself. That name… I felt as if I’d heard it before…

Chizuru Yukimura: ”……“

Looking at me as I thought about it, Kondou-sensei smiled and kept talking.

Isami Kondou: “Yukimura-kun, it looks like the sun is about to set. Don’t you think it’s time for you to head home?”

Chizuru Yukimura: “Oh, right. That’s true. It’s already so late…”

Isami Kondou: “By the way, I heard from Toshi. It looks like you got some magnificent test results this time around.”

Chizuru Yukimura: “Hijikata-sensei said that?”

Isami Kondou: “Yes, you’re the most talented woman in the history of Hakuo Academy! It truly is magnificent!”

Chizuru Yukimura: “…Thank you very much.”

There was no hint of lies or flattery in Kondou-sensei’s cheerful words… I remembered how he delivered them while walking away, and I felt a little embarrassed.

Isami Kondou: “A student has a duty to study, so I want you to continue trying your hardest! But of course, it’s not just your studies. If you also have fun living your everyday life at Hakuo Academy... As this school’s principal, I’d be very happy!”

Chizuru Yukimura: “Yes!”

Returning his nod as he smiled, I looked back at ‘Shieikan’ only once. He had called it the ‘starting point’ for the school. I wonder what that meant…? Questions along those lines came to mind, and I couldn’t help but wonder at such a mystery…

Anyway, I would do my best from here forward. I smiled, in high spirits.

#Hakuouki #Hakuoki #Hakuouki SSL #otome #fan translation #toudou heisuke #chapter 1 #updated

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blackwidownat2814 · 4 years

Text

CS January Joy, Day 17: The One With Emma & Killian’s Fancy Party

The One With Emma & Killian’s Fancy Party AO3

Emma did not like many things. In fact, she hated most things. Being abandoned on the side of the road in the middle of October in Maine a few weeks after birth by one’s parents will do that.

She hadn’t always been that way. When Emma was 17, she’d run from her last group home and found him. Neal was everything to her and the first person to show her what she thought was love. Then he’d left her, like her parents. He left her pregnant and holding stolen merchandise. Then, a few months into her 11-month sentence, Emma lost her baby. Her anger for Neal grew to insurmountable heights.

So when she met Killian Jones and his weirdly overactive eyebrows, Emma told him (and herself) that she was not going to fall for his charms.

How wrong she was.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Try as she did, Emma failed, and after a year, they moved in together and for a while, all Emma could do was wait. Wait for him to realize she was too much work and leave. Wait for him to realize her insecurities would really never go away and leave because of that too.

But he never did. And a year after they moved in together, Emma finally realized that when Killian said he was in it for the long haul, he meant it.

~*~*~*~*~*~

“Emma, love! Have you seen my favorite tie?” Killian called from their bedroom.

“I swear Killian…” Emma came in and went to the closet, digging in the far corner. After finding her quarry, she turned in triumph and tossed him a navy tie with white and red anchors all over it. “If you head wasn’t attached to your neck, you’d probably lose track of that too.”

“Aye, but you love me anyways.”

“Maybe”, she replied with a wink as she headed back to her office.

“Are you going back to hide away and work on my birthday present?”

“Maybe”, Emma said again.

“Alright then, keep your secrets. I am off to heal the young children of Storybrooke. I’ll see you tonight my love.” Killian turned to leave, but Emma stopped him.

“Aren’t you forgetting something?” she asked, crooking her finger at him. Killian laughed and leaned on her desk. Emma reached up and grabbed his tie, pulling him down for a kiss. “I love you, Killian.”

“I love you too, my Swan.” He gave her another quick peck and left. Emma smiled as she watched Killian walked away, feeling so proud of him.

When she and Killian had met, he had been working at Storybrooke General Hospital as a member of the pediatrics department and were set up (oh so shadily, Emma liked to say) by the Sheriff’s wife. Mary Margaret Nolan wanted everyone to be happy and in love, just like her and David.

Emma shook her head of the wonderful memories of her time with Killian and turned back to her computer, opening the manuscript for The Savior and The Privateer. The series, which was set in a land called the Enchanted Forest where fairytales were real, followed the adventures of The Savior, who was on a quest to break a curse cast by an evil witch that had plagued her home for many years.

~*~*~*~*~*~

A couple of days into the new year, Emma surprised Killian with dinner.

“This is wonderful darling! Thank you!” He leaned over the table and gave her a kiss. “However, my birthday isn’t for another few weeks…”

“I know, but I did something special for your birthday this year”, Emma replied.

“Can I see it? Please love!”

“No!” Emma laughed at his childlike enthusiasm when it came to things like presents. “You have to wait until after dinner.”

“Swaaaan…”

“No. Eat first, presents later.”

They chatted throughout their meal and Emma couldn’t help but laugh when she noticed that Killian ate more quickly than he usually did. When finished, to mess with him, Emma had Killian do the clean-up.

“I’m done! How about now love?”

“Okay.” Emma had him take a seat on the couch and close his eyes. “No peeking!”

Killian’s eye popped open when she dropped the box in hands and he immediately ripped the paper and box top off to reveal a stack of papers.

“The Savior and the Privateer? Emma, love, is this your latest novel? You said you weren’t going to let me read it before everyone else! It does seem--”

“It’s just the first chapter and I know. But after thinking about it, I changed my mind. I think I’d like to know what you think before my editor gets her hands on it.”

“Regina means well my love. She just wants the best possible outcome for you.”

“I know, but that red ink she does her editing in...oof, I get why people like to call her the Evil Queen.”

“Wouldn’t it be the most humorous thing for those people to know she’s actually the absolute nicest? And funny at that?”

“Very.” Emma sighed. “So! Give the chapter a look. Right now, the book is sitting at 15. When you finish one chapter, I’ll give you the next. Cool?”

“Very cool.”

~*~*~*~*~*~

A few days later…

Killian carried the manuscript for Emma’s novel in his briefcase in the days after she gave it to him. He was anxious to get to reading it, but work was busy, and he hadn’t yet had a chance. So, when the weekend rolled around, he poured himself some rum and sat down to read.

When he finished the first chapter, there was neon yellow sticky note on the last page and it held a loving message:

“I feel like everything in my life has led me to you. My choices, my heartbreaks, my regrets. Everything. And when we’re together, my past seems worth it. Because if I had done one thing differently, I might never have met you. -Unknown”

A long time ago, I wasn’t good with words...I didn’t have the right ones. So, I’m going to tell you how much I love you with other people’s words. Like Big in the Sex & the City movie (which I know you hated watching with me, but hey...you love me).

I love you Killian Jones.

Killian smiled and peeled the sticky note from the last page and went to the office and stuck it on the wall.

“I see you finished the chapter.” Killian found Emma leaning against the doorframe, arms crossed and a big smile on her face. In that moment, he couldn’t not think of a time when he hadn’t loved her. Try as she did to dissuade him from pursuing her, he wouldn’t. Killian recognized the same sense of loss and loneliness in her that he carried with him. Emma’s strength in the face of everything life threw at her was what made him love her even more. She didn’t take his crap and she took no one’s crap, and she wouldn’t change for anyone, not even him. He loved her just the way she was.

“I did, my love, and it was remarkable.” Killian walked over and pulled her into his arms, laying a soft kiss on her head.

“Thanks for remarking on it.” Emma leaned away with a sly smile. “Do you want to read some more?”

“Yes!” He watched as Emma went to her desk and unlocked a bottom drawer, pulled out Chapter 2 and handed it over to him. Killian kissed Emma on the cheek. “Thanks love. I’ll leave you to yourself, because I need to know what happens.”

“Have fun then. I have to go take care of a few things.” Killian looked up from his spot on the couch. Something was off. He could always tell when something wasn’t going right with his Swan.

“Is everything okay Emma?”

“Yeah! Yeah.” The fact that her voice went up several octaves did nothing to quell his thoughts.

“Emm-”

“Everything’s fine Killian. With the way the flu is going around, I’m just worried. You know I hate getting sick. I’m just going to go to Dark Star Pharmacy for a flu shot. So don’t worry about me.”

“I’ll always worry about you Emma. I love you.”

“I love you too. Enjoy your reading.” Killian watched her as she left, knowing that there was something she wasn’t telling him. He wouldn’t push, Emma would tell him when she was ready.

Killian was on the last couple of pages when his love returned. Something had happened the hours she was gone because when she returned, Emma glowed as if she’d had a weight lifted off her shoulders.

“Hello love! How was it? Does your boo-boo need a kiss?” he asked cheekily.

“Tonight.” She winked and took a seat next to him, kicking her now socked feet up onto the coffee table. “So, what’d you think of this chapter?”

“Well, I’ve not finished yet. Just some pages to go.”

“Finish up then! I need to know.”

“Of course my darling.”

Killian went back to the page he was at and read on. This time when he was done, there was a neon pink sticky note that read:

“You find somebody you like and roll the dice. That’s all anybody can do. -Ron Swanson”

You inspire me every single day Killian. When I rolled the dice on you, I got a Nat 20.

Killian laughed to himself at Emma’s talk of dice. No one would know his Swan was a diehard fan of Dungeons & Dragons fan. He himself had never played, but started learning from Will Scarlett, a nurse at the hospital, so he could share in something she enjoyed.

“So, did you like it?” the woman in question asked from her spot at the end of the couch.

“Of course I did Emma. Have you got the next one ready?” She giggled, her entire face lighting up with happiness which, in turn, made Killian happy.

As her phone rang, Emma handed over chapter 3.

“Enjoy while I take this.”

“Thank you darling.” He watched as Emma went into the office and shut the door.

~*~*~*~*~*~

“I hate the way you talk to me, and the way you cut your hair. I hate the way you drive my car. I hate it when you stare. I hate your big dumb combat boots, and the way you read my mind. I hate you so much it makes me sick; it even makes me rhyme. I hate it, I hate the way you’re always right. I hate it when you lie. I hate it when you make me laugh, even worse when you make me cry. I hate it when you’re not around, and the fact that you didn’t call. But mostly I hate the way I don’t hate you. Not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all. -Katarina Stratford, 10 Things I Hate About You”

Sometimes I felt like Kat did, because I saw so much of myself in her: angry at the world because of what some asshole did to me. It’s why I was so mad at myself when I met you. I was mad that you were so perfect for me. I was mad how good of a person you were. I was mad that you were proving me wrong. I was mad that you basically kicked down the walls around my heart like they were a flimsy door.

~*~*~*~*~*~

It went on like this for every chapter.

For every chapter Killian finished, there were neon colored sticky notes at the end with quotes from some of Emma’s favorite movies or books or whatever, and little notes from her too. Killian kept them all, adding each new note to his colorful collage.

~*~*~*~*~*~

The day before his birthday, Killian was in the kitchen when Emma found him. He smiled at her over his favorite mug inscribed with LIKE A BOSS on the front, noticing she was hiding something behind her back.

“What have you got there Swan?”

“Oh nothing. Just the final chapter in the main story”, she said and pulled the stack of papers from behind her back.

“This is the last?”

“No, actually.” Emma slid the chapter into Killian’s black leather briefcase and snapped it shut. “There’s going to be an epilogue. But you aren’t getting it until tomorrow. It’s your birthday present.”

“I thought the whole book was my birthday present?” Killian rinsed his mug and slipped on his suit jacket, taking the briefcase from Emma.

“The epilogue is...special.”

“Uh huh.” Killian gave her a deep kiss and pulled back to leave. “Like I said before, keep your secrets. I can’t wait to read this chapter. See you tonight my love.”

~*~*~*~*~*~

“When did I fall so deeply under your spell, [Killian]? I cannot fix the hour or the spot or the look or the words which lay the foundation. I was in the middle before I knew it began. -Mr. Darcy, Pride & Prejudice & Zombies

“The very first moment I beheld you, my heart was irrevocably gone. -Lizzie, PPZ”

Remember when I told you ‘I love you’ for the first time? How you asked what was wrong because all of a sudden, in the middle of wrapping some birthday presents for David, I just drop the scissors on the floor and yelled ‘Fuck!’? That moment. That moment made me realize that I basically loved you from the beginning but I was all the way in before it had even hit me. I love you Killian.

Killian never meant to cry into his lunch, but he did. And when he got home that night, he made sure to let Emma know how loved she was.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Emma was happy that Killian chose to work a half day on his birthday. He met up with her, Mary Margaret, and David for lunch, but it grew to include Will, Robin and Regina, Tina and Jefferson, Ruby, Archie, and Belle, who had wanted to surprise Killian and rounded up his and Emma’s friends.

They spent the afternoon eating, laughing, and telling stories at Killian’s expense. Emma hadn’t laughed that hard in a long time, and she was happy to see boyfriend happy. The feeling of when the shoe might drop had gone away for good and she knew everything was going to be okay.

Later that night, when they returned home, Emma went straight to her file cabinet and pulled out the epilogue. Killian hung his jacket on the rack near the door and went to pour himself some rum.

“Here. I’m going to change into some PJs. It’s pretty short, so you’ll probably be finished by the time I’m done. Enjoy...and happy birthday.”

“Thank you love.” Emma hurried (but not obviously, she hoped) back to their bedroom and dug around their closet, where she hid the ring she intended to propose with.

Emma took a deep breath, preparing herself for what she was about to do when she heard Killian’s footsteps heading towards the bedroom. When she emerged from the closet, Killian was standing in the doorway, staring at her and holding the final Post-It plus something special.

“Did you like it?” Emma took a seat at the end of their bed. She looked down at the ring in her lap, worrying. She knew he loved her but what if this was what he thought was too much. It’s not something she ever would’ve predicted.

Killian knelt in front of her, sticking it to her knee. Emma didn’t have to look down to know what it said:

"I guess I kind of hate most things. But I never really seem to hate you. So I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Is that cool? -April’s vows to Andy”

I know you think it should’ve been you to propose, but guess what old man? It’s 2020 now. ;-)

Don’t be sad you didn’t do it first. Be happy instead. Happy that we’re going to be a family.

I love you so much Killian.

“Emma? What is this?” Killian handed her a small, grainy picture. In it, what looked like a small kidney bean just floated in the middle. “Is it what I’m hoping?”

Emma took the picture from him and wiped the tears she saw skipping down his cheeks.

“This”, she held up the picture, “...is your son...or your daughter. I can honestly say that I don’t really have a preference. How about you?”

“You’re pregnant?

“That’s what the picture means, yeah.”

“Is this why you went to see Whale?”

“Yup.” He hadn’t shown any kind of reaction, positive or negative, and she was a little worried. Kids weren’t something they had talked about. Emma hadn’t known that she wanted to get married, much less have a kid, but now that she knew she was pregnant, she was already in love.

“How long?” Killian was staring at her midsection.

“He said about six weeks.” They were both quiet as Killian started to cry in earnest.

“This is the greatest birthday gift I’ve ever had.”

“You never answered me you know.”

“What?”

“I asked you to marry me and you never answered.”

“Isn’t it obvious Swan?”

~*~*~*~*~*~

Emma and Killian got married some months later. They tied the knot at Village by the Sea in nearby Wells, Maine. Emma in blushing pink ankle length gown that proudly showed off her five months’ pregnant belly and Killian in a dark navy suit with his favorite tie.

Meera Alice Jones was born in early August on a beautiful Friday afternoon. Bright blue eyes and tufts of dark hair, just like her father. Meera’s brother, however, was just like their mother. Oliver David Jones came into the world 16 minutes after his sister, sharp green eyes and wisps of blonde.

There was always love in their family. Were they a perfect family with no problems or arguments or anything like that? No. Far from it. But the point is, even with those arguments and stress and everything else…they were happy, for as long as they lived.

#Captain Swan #CS FF #CS Fic #CSJJ2020 #CS January Joy #Captain Swan January Joy

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turtle-steverogers · 5 years

Text

Sand Dollars- a Ralbert War Story

heheh hi guys im in college now and im posting a thing hello

also i know I KNOW that fugitives and titanium need some love

they will GET that love, i promise

ok ok now for the lowdown on this story-

warnings: none for this chap, but OH BOOY will there be some warnings in the future. this is not a happy story

ship: ralbert, some kinda spalbert (but not romantic. its like,,,,platonic ish)

word count: 3228

editing: no, so plz excuse any shit

CHAP 1

June, 2006

Albert tugged at the collar of his uniform, inwardly cursing the stifling heat of the shaky boeing aircraft he’d been trapped on for the past fifteen hours. A thin sheen of sweat covered his entire being and he pushed a hand through his hair, wrinkling his nose a little at the short length of his regulation cut. He usually liked to keep his hair on the longer side when off-duty, framing his face and curling at the nape of his neck. And even though he supposed he should be used to the short, crew cut by now, he didn’t have to like it. Besides, the longer hair suited his face better. Or so that’s what he was always told.

The announcement of their descent echoed through the plane and Albert sighed, vaguely wishing he’d pissed one more time before the fasten seatbelt sign flashed on again. The eclectic mix of uniform service members that surrounded him began shifting around, readjusting their seats back to their original positions and stowing their tray tables.

Albert rolled his eyes minutely, realizing that he should probably do the same before some asshole called him out for it. Everything always needed to be perfect around these people. Dress right dress and all that crap.

But as much as all this shit gave him a headache, there was no place he’d rather be.

His circumstances growing up had been less than ideal. A dead mother at nine and an absent father at eleven had gotten him dumped into the foster care system with his two brothers (who he eventually got separated from and hadn’t heard from since. Which he definitely wasn’t still fucking devastated about. No, he was good at moving on and dealing with his shit. Yeah, very good). No less than fourteen homes later, he turned 18 and finally, finally, he was done being some fucking ward of the state.

But fourteen homes meant just as many, if not more, schools. And when you’re being shoved from household to household with nothing but a couple bags filled with clothes and other absolute essentials, you don’t really have time to do well in school or apply to colleges.

The National Guard had sounded like a blessing at the time. An absolute saving grace with health and financial benefits to last him a literal lifetime. He always had been good at listening to directions and taking orders, so he figured he’d be a perfect fit. And he had.

Those first few years between enlisting and basic training had been some of the best of Albert’s life. He’d made bonds to last him a lifetime, felt the thrill of having something that was his and he was good at. He had found purpose where he previously had none.

Then three planes had gone and crashed into the Twin Towers and Pentagon and everything went to shit.

Albert and one of his buddies from Basic, Sean (who went by Spot, but nobody knew why. Albert had asked once and Spot had just smiled and kicked him in the shin) were living in New York at the time, having moved into a little apartment on the Upper East Side. The morning of September 11 had yielded one of the clearest, bluest skies Albert had seen in his entire life.

He remembered waking up to a call from his squad leader, barely able to comprehend the situation through his killer fucking hangover. He and Spot really hadn’t planned on getting hammered on a Monday night, but sometimes life in your early 20s just happened like that.

The next four days had been a blur of smoke, sirens, debri, and dust. So much dust. It had taken weeks for Albert to feel like the damn stuff was finally out of his lungs and if he still thought about it too hard, a phantom tickle would creep up in his chest.

He tried not to think about that week too much. Spot and him had returned home around the same time, both in varying states of exhaustion and dissociation. They didn’t discuss what they had individually been through, but an unspoken understanding of the nightmare they’d both witnessed had led them into the same bed that night, the need to forget shrouding everything else.

Albert and Spot’s relationship wasn’t anything that could be truly named. They weren’t best friends. They weren’t boyfriends. They weren’t fuckbuddies. But they understood each other better than anyone Albert had ever known in his 27 years on this god forsaken earth. And in that understanding, the knowledge that sometimes you just need to feel good for a night went without having to be spoken. Feeling good didn’t just mean sex, though. They cuddled a fair amount too, which was strange considering how touch averse Spot was with other people. During their first deployment, though, several long days had led to quiet nights spent in each others arms, where they allowed themselves to forget the horrors they were subject to witness and just be.

They were basically inseparable. So when the heavens happened upon them and they were to be deployed into the same battalion again, despite Albert climbing through the ranks and surpassing Spot by a fair deal, he had silently thanked a god he hadn’t prayed to since eight years old.

Leaving home was easy, mostly because Albert didn’t have anyone to leave behind. Spot was already overseas, having left a couple weeks earlier while Albert finished up some things down at the Pentagon. While being deployed sucked, Albert at least had Spot to look forward to.

The plane jolted, tilting a little as it made it made its final descent into the Tal Afar Airport. Albert leaned back against the headrest, closing his eyes and white knuckling the armrests. He was a fine flyer once the plane was up in the air, but taking off and landing fucked him upside down and sideways.

He was just beginning to count his breaths, clamping down the rolling waves of motion sickness, when a low voice spoke next to him.

“Are you alright, sir?” Albert cracked open an eye, glancing sideways at the person next to him, “Not a fan of flying?”

The guy looked...rugged. There was no other word for it. His black hair was cut close to his head, well within regulation and looking a little patchy at the sides. His wide set eyes were sharp and calculating, glinting with something like mischief that would unsettle Albert if he hadn’t seen that look a million times over in the mirror. He looked younger than Albert by a good few years and the lack of shadows in his gaze and on his face cast a look of innocence over him. Albert remembered those days- when naivety led him to a false sense of security. He had been untouchable; indestructible.

“Only take off and landing,” Albert said, clearing his throat and putting on what had to look like a strained smile. He pried his right hand off the armrest and held it out for the guy to shake, “First Sergeant Albert Dasilva. Good to meet ya.”

The guy had a firm handshake and he didn’t seem to mind that Albert’s palm was a little sweaty from nerves, “Private Elmer Kasprzak.”

Albert smiled, “First time in the Sandbox?”

Elmer smiled, looking a little self deprecating, “That obvious, sir?”

Albert shook his head, aiming for comforting, but still sounding vaguely choked, “I just know the look. Way too excited.”

“Oh,” Elmer furrowed his brow, looking like he was trying to decide whether to be offended or not, “I’m just happy to finally be on the frontline, sir.”

“I commend you,” Albert said, wistfully, “It’s a brave thing to be doing with such a strong attitude.”

Elmer blushed, “Thank you, sir.”

“You don’t have to tack ‘sir’ onto every sentence,” Albert assured him, “Some guys are really strict about that, so keep in the habit, but I’m not too picky.”

“Oh, okay s- uh, okay,” Elmer flushed deeper and Albert chuckled a little bit patting his knee.

The plane touched down with a jerk and Albert closed his eyes again briefly while it slowed. Eventually, it came to a stop and the fasten seatbelt sign flashed off. Albert reopened his eyes to see Elmer staring out the window, awe and apprehension noticeable through the look in his eyes and the crease between his brows.

“C’mon, Private,” Albert said, unbuckling and clapping the younger man’s shoulder, “we got places to be.”

XXX

Getting assigned last minute to a completely new battalion and then being shipped overseas two weeks later was not how Race suspected he’d be spending his first year out of West Point. He didn’t mind really. He hadn’t really had any true connections to his old squad and after his little incident with Oscar Delancey, a new start was appreciated.

That didn’t make the whiplash of deployment any less bittersweet.

His nerves hadn’t stopped twisting since General Kelly had informed him of his new assignment, going back and forth between excitement and paralyzing anxiety until his gut was furling with both simultaneously. But now that he was here, things were starting to settle within him. This was his life now and it was going to be his life for the next twelve months. Better get used to it.

He put the last of his shirts in one of his dresser drawers, casting a cursory glance around his side of the room, before eyeing his cheap, Walmart alarm clock. 09:45. The next wave of soldiers should be arriving soon and with them, his roommate.

A wave of anticipation rolled through Race’s stomach and he grimaced. He had yet to make any meaningful connections with his soldiers so far, many of them wary of having a new CO. But he was a people person and this alienation was killing him, even though he understood their hesitation. Part of him hoped that whoever his roommate ended up being wouldn’t hold the same vigilance towards him. Maybe he could even make a friend. Someone he could theoretically get a drink with. Completely hypothetically, of course. Drinking wasn’t allowed on base.

Sighing, Race grabbed his patrol cap, cramming it onto his head and grabbing a pack of cigarettes from his desk. He bounded down the stairs to his trailer and made his way over to the coffee line, nodding his greeting at a small clique of soldiers as he passed. He only got a couple nods in return, and every single one of them wore matching, judgemental looks. Race tried not to take it to heart.

The line for coffee took forever and Race hummed a little to himself, toying with the pack of cigarettes in his pocket while he waited for the cue to move at a snail’s pace. Once he held his little styrofoam cup in hand, he ventured off to the smoking pit, draining his coffee along the way.

Soldiers were beginning to arrive and Race lit up a cigarette, watching with casual curiosity as groups flooded into camp. He eyed them, vaguely wondering who each of them was. Who he would get along with. Who he would despise. Who would despise him.

He quickly got overwhelmed again and stomped out his finished stub, lighting up another to kill a few more minutes.

An indiscernible amount of time passed and Race kicked his last cigarette to the dust, pulling back the sleeve of his ACU jacket and checking the time. 11:15. Damn, that coffee line really had taken forever.

Deeming his little break long enough, Race wandered back towards his trailer, heart rate kicking up a bit when he noticed that the door was propped open.

Steeling himself, Race climbed the stairs, knocking once on the door jamb, before ducking inside.

The person inside turned his head, peering up from where he was folding a few grey, regulation workout pants on his recently made cot.

He was wearing his ACU pants and boots, but his jacket had been discarded and with a quick glance around, Race found it draped over the back of his desk chair. The guy was attractive- a sharp jawline accentuated by his pale skin and dark red hair, which was trimmed attractively, fading up the sides. It was as if the guy knew from experience how to make the most of the look without pushing regulation. His arms and chest were muscular, highlighted by the stretch of his tan, liner t-shirt.

A charming smile stretched across the guys face as he straightened up, crossing the small expanse of their room and holding out a hand, which Race took firmly.

“First Sergeant Albert Dasilva,” He said, his voice smooth and a little gravelly, “Pleasure to meet you, sir.”

Race smiled back, “Lieutenant Antonio Higgins,” he said, hoping he sounded a lot more confident than he felt, “I’m honored to be working with you and your squadron and I’m looking forward to getting to know everyone.”

Albert dropped his hand, turning back to continue unpacking his things. He only had one large duffle and two small carry on bags and suddenly, Race felt self conscious about his two duffle and impressive assortment of other luggage.

“Honestly, we’re just lucky that you were available to serve with us, sir,” Dasilva said, straightening his shoes by his closet, dress right dress, “Everyone was really bummed and pretty panicked when Lieutenant Morris fucked up his leg, so it’s great that General Kelly was able to get you on board so quick.”

Race crossed to his side of the room, tossing his cap back onto his cot and slumping into his own desk chair, “I was pretty eager to get overseas, but I wasn’t expecting it to happen so quick.”

Dasilva hummed, sounding a little surprised, “This is your first deployment?” He asked, looking over his shoulder and raising his eyebrows a little.

“Yeah,” Race said, ducking his head a little as he flushed, “Just got outta West Point last May.”

Dasilva whistled, looking impressed, “You musta done damn well if you’re already a Lieutenant,” he said, smiling a little challengingly, “and add the fact that Kelly sought you out directly,” he shook his head, bemused, “Damn, sir, you’ve got quite the rep.”

Race wrinkled his nose, “My so called ‘rep’ ain’t really getting me anywhere with your men.”

Dasilva shrugged a shoulder, waving his hand dismissively, “Don’t take whatever they’re doing to heart,” he said, “They’re all still upset about Lieutenant Morris. He was a great Lieutenant and a lot of the guys are still feeling his absence. They’ll warm up to you, sir.”

Race grunted noncommittally. He knew that Dasilva was trying to make him feel better with his little pep talk, but the knot in Race’s stomach only grew. It seemed like he had pretty fucking big shoes to fill.

“Aha!”

Race was pulled out of his spiraling worries by Dasilva’s voice and he looked up to see him holding a toothbrush and toothpaste.

“Finally found them,” Dasilva said, triumphantly. He waved them a little in Race’s direction, “I’m gonna go freshen up. That fifteen hour flight always makes me feel grungy as shit.”

Race nodded his acknowledgement, watching as his new bunkmate exited the room and traipsed down the steps, leaving the door open behind him. He could see him greeting other soldiers with a level of enthusiasm and charm Race could only dream to match. His jealousy spiked even further when he got equally happy greetings in response.

Blowing out a measured breath, Race flipped open his notebook, toying with the pristine patch on the front as he vaguely studied the Arabic terms he’d been practicing on the plane ride there.

He was pretty good already, if he said so himself, with an impressive language proficiency score of 3+ under his belt. But solidifying knowledge was always beneficial, no matter one’s skill.

A few minutes later, Dasilva bounded back through the door to their trailer, finally easing the door shut behind him. He stuck his toothpaste and toothbrush back into his little hygiene kit and tucked the thing neatly into the top drawer of his dresser.

Race kept his eyes on his notebook, not entirely sure how to progress with their conversation. He was out of his depth- usually being the loud and confident one, but somehow rendered socially inept in this completely foreign environment.

Dasilva didn’t seem to notice his internal battle, though, and a moment later, he spoke up.

“You fluent yet?”

Race startled a bit, looking up, “Almost, I’m still working on conversational communication, but I’ve got all the basics in the bag.”

Dasilva grinned, seemingly not jarred by the sudden change in language, “That’s good. Already something you have over Lieutenant Morris. With him, we almost always needed a terp on site.”

“No need for one of those here,” Race said, switching back to english.

“Obviously, sir,” Dasilva agreed. There was another lull in conversation, but Dasilva didn’t seem uncomfortable, “Do you like running?”

Race felt his stomach flip excitedly, “Yeah, actually, I love it. Did track all through middle in high school. That’s actually where-” He cut himself off hastily. Dasilva did not need to know about his little adolescent nickname that he still used unironically. Not yet anyway.

Dasilva gave him a funny look, but didn’t push, “Great. I go running every morning with one of my buddies before call. You’re welcome to join us if you want.”

“That sounds nice,” Race said, “I’d love to. Who’s your buddy?” He added out of curiosity.

“Sean Conlon,” Dasilva stated and Race hummed, recognizing the name, but not having a face to put it with, “He and I go way back.”

The weight of the words seemed to hold something heavy, but Race returned Dasilva’s courtesy and didn’t push.

“Sounds like a good guy,” Race said, “What time should I wake up?”

“We usually go around 04:45,” Dasilva said, leaning back into his regulation pillows, “You’ll probably hear my alarm anyway.”

Race nodded, “I’ll set one on my clock, too, just in case.”

“Good plan.”

A knock at their door had both of them exchanging a curious look. Race stood to get it and found a taller man with straight, cropped brown hair and a rigid nose standing at ease outside the door. He smiled cordially when Race looked up at him and offered him a hand.

“Lieutenant Higgins?” Race nodded and the man shook his hand firmly, “Excellent. Captain David Jacobs, it’s nice to meet you.”

“You too, sir.”

“General Kelly would like to see you over in his office,” Jacobs continued, sounding a little warmer. His eyes flicked over Race’s shoulder to Dasilva, who hastily stood at attention.

“First Sergeant Albert Dasilva, sir,” Dasilva said, his voice hardening as he saluted.

“At ease, soldier,” Jacobs said, “Pleasure to meet you.”

They all stood in silence for a short pause, before Race awkwardly turned and grabbed his patrol cap.

“General Kelly requested for me now, sir?” He asked Jacobs.

“Yes,” Jacobs confirmed.

“Alright,” Race placed the cap on his head and looked back to where Dasilva was still standing, “I’ll see you later, Sergeant.”

“See you, sir,” Dasilva smirked, “Good luck.”

Race resisted stating that he’ll need it as the trailer door swung closed behind him.

thanks for reading, chiefs

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#newsies #newsies fic #ralbert #racetrack higgins #albert dasilva #davey jacobs #Jack Kelly #spot conlon #war au #sand dollars fic #hehe #uhhh #please yell at me #yeah...#college is wild and this happnened

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sarahegerton96 · 5 years

Text

Our Perfect Little Christmas Gift

This is for the most amazing girl I know @primaba11erina,this is part 2 of Field Trip, hope you like it, sorry if there's any mistakes I edited it as best I could, hope you like it, enjoy babes :)

Summary: This part takes place 7 1/2 months after Dennis and Y/N find that there going to be parents, its Y/N last day at work before she leaves for maternity leave, looking forward to the birth of their of their first born and so much more...

Y/N waddles into the kitchen,to rummage through the fridge looking for something to satisfy her midnight cravings,she sighs in frustration and slams the door making the contents rattle inside. The noise of the door slamming startles Dennis awake, he rolls over in the bed to discover your not there and goes to investigate. He enters the kitchen to see you sitting at the breakfast bar crying, he hurries over wrapping you in a bear hug, "Y/N babe whats wrong?" he coo's in your ear. "It's nothing babe honestly, just hormones" you sniffle, "Please babe tell me whats wrong" he asks persuasively, you break down in tears. "There's no food in the house" you sobs into his chest. "Ssh it's okay sweetheart" he soothes running his fingers through your hair attempting to calm you down, "Would you like me to make you something to eat sweetheart?" he questions softly, "No its okay, I know what I want now babe" she says beaming up at him with a mischievous smile plastered across her face fluttering her eyelashes at him. "Oh god why do I not like where this is going or that it requires me to go on a wild goose chase to track down your cravings" he says with a half playful half serious smile on his face. "Well you did help put him/her in here so you kinda have to help feed him/her" you say as you rub you ever growing baby bump. Dennis rolls his eyes and shakes his head chuckling as he goes to pull on track pants and a t-shirt as he knows he's been sent out to source your cravings, he returns from the bedroom,"What you craving babe?" he says as he grabs his car keys and phone. "Sushi, beef rolls to be precise" you say as wrap your arms around him kissing him on the cheek and thanking him with the biggest smile plastered on your face, content that your cravings are soon going to be fulfilled. "Anything to keep my baby happy" he says as he makes his way to the door, "What would I do without babe" you say as he just sends a wink you way and he out the door on a sushi hunt.

You make you way to the bedroom to wait for Dennis to get back with your sushi, you go to the bathroom and then head back to the bed to lay down and try get comfortable and relieve some of the pressure in your stomach, you finally get comfortable enough and lay there rubbing your bump talking to the baby, as your talking to your bump you notice you eyes getting heavy, you close you eyes to rest them for a minute, you drift into a peaceful sleep. "babe I'm back" Dennis shouts as he comes through the door with your sushi in a bag thankful for the late night opening sushi bar not to far from your house, "Babe" he calls again when he gets no answer the second time round he goes to the bedroom to find you stretched out across the bed lightly snoring with your hand placed on your bump, "Seriously woman, you make me go fetch you sushi to come back and find you asleep?" he says to himself as he lightly laughs making his way to the kitchen to put your sushi in the fridge, he turns out all the lights and makes sure the house is locked up and makes his way back the bedroom, he strips himself of his pants and top, knocks off the bedroom light and gently climbs into the bed beside you careful not to wake you, he covers you with the duvet, kisses you on the forehead, wraps his arms around you gently rubbing your bump. "Goodnight sweetheart, I love yous" he says as he drifts off to sleep.

You wake up the morning to the sound of your alarm going off you, you knock your alarm off placing your phone back on the nightstand, getting up and hurrying to the bathroom to pee AGAIN for the god knows how many times that night/morning. After going toilet you turn the shower on and step in letting the hot water wash over you relaxing all your aching muscles, being pregnant was really taking its toll on your body from the aches and pains to the stretch marks and not to mention the crippling pressure in your abdomen and your nether regions as the baby grew bigger and now that he/she was head down the pressure was more intense. You finished rinsing yourself of your scarlet blossom scent body wash, turned the shower off and attempted to step out of the shower failing miserably. "Shit I'm stuck" you mumbled to yourself in annoyance knowing you were going to have to call Dennis for help which meant waking him up an hour earlier than he had to be up. "Dennis babe I'm stuck can you come help me" you shouted from the shower, hoping it would wake him...nothing...crap. I stirred in my sleep as I thought I heard Y/N call me listening out to see if I heard correctly or if it was just a dream, "Dennis" I heard Y/N call again a sense of urgency in her voice I shot up out of the bed thinking the worst that the baby was coming early I hurried over to the bathroom where I heard her voice coming from. "Y/N are you okay, is the baby coming?" I said in a worry fearing the worst, "Yes and no and no the baby is not coming" I said "What's wrong then?" he questioned as he slowly opened the door peering around it seeing me standing there "I'm stuck" I replied as I kept my head down to embarrassed to look at Dennis. My head shot up as I heard him chuckle "It's not funny" I snapped at him my frustration and embarrassment growing more "I'm sorry but c'mon babe lighten up it's a bit funny" he said as he handed me a towel for my hair and my robe from the back of the door. I wrapped my hair up and slipped the robe on. "Shut up and help me out before I'm late for my last for my last day of work before maternity leave" I said stretching my hands out for him to help, he took my hands helping me out over the edge of the bath, "How exactly did you manage to get stuck?" he questioned curiously "I was trying to get out and was too afraid of slipping as the floor of the bath was wet" you reply sheepishly "Ah I see well lets gets you dried and dressed my little pumpkin" he says as he kisses your temple helping you out to the bedroom.

"I'm going down to get the coffee on, follow me down when your ready pumpkin" Dennis says as he walks out of the room towards the kitchen, you waddle over to your closet to look for clothes to wear today, you check the weather on your phone to see that its forecast to rain, you decide on some black jeans a Halloween themed maternity top that you had bought but had yet to wear and a hoodie which you paired with black converse, once you were dressed you headed downstairs and joined Dennis in the kitchen. "You look beautiful babe as always" Dennis says as he hands you a cup of decaf coffee, "thank you, do you like my top?" you ask as you unzip you your hoodie to reveal it to him, "I love it" he says chuckling as he reads your top, "though you would get a kick out it" you reply as you sip you coffee(pun intended). "What would you like for breakfast?" Dennis questions with a smirk on his face hinting about him having to go on a sushi hunt to satisfy your cravings last night to discover you asleep when he got back. Knowing exactly what he was hinting at you laughed nervously apologizing for sending him on a sushi hunt last night "hmm I think i'll have some beef rolls" you say laughing as Dennis joined in with you, "sounds perfect babe". After you and Dennis ate and he teased you about falling asleep on him you noticed it was time to leave, "have a good day at work babe, we love you" you said as you kissed Dennis goodbye rubbing you bump "you too pumpkin, I love you's too" he said as he made his was to the bathroom to shower before getting ready to head to work himself.

**The top you wear**

Your final day of work before maternity leave went smoothly, you had parents and students wishing you good luck with the birth and when the baby arrives, you thanked them for there well wishes and for the beautiful hamper that they had all got you. Once you had packed up your room you made you way towards the staff room to say goodbye to everyone, as you walked in everyone shouted "SURPRISE" you jumped not expecting it and saw they had the room decorated in pink and blue baby decorations and baby shower balloons, "Aww you guys you's didn't have to do this for me, this is so sweet, thank you's so much" you gushed with tears in you eyes ready to cry from the sweet surprise and the hormones, "don't you start crying on us, you'll set us all off" Ms Madden said trying to lighten the mood, "No promises" you say half sniffling half chucking. Everyone had bought you beautiful gifts for the baby and for yourself after you had the baby. "Thank you all so much this was so unexpected but so kind and I appreciate all the beautiful gifts" you say hugging everyone as you try to hold back the tears, Ms.Madden helped you to your car with all you gifts, one loaded you gave her one final hug and thanked her again and you were on your way home, hopefully to relax for the next 6 weeks until the baby arrived.

***The hamper you class got you***

You arrive home and head inside to relax with a cup of coffee as you mentally prepare yourself for the task of unloading the car and putting the gifts away in the nursery. After sitting down for an hour to relax you look at the clock noticing it was 3pm and that Dennis would be home between 4:30-5pm, so you better get a move on you thought to yourself as you put your cup in the sink and made you way to the car retrieving the gifts, the first trip to the car was for the hamper the 2nd and 3rd trip was for the bags of gifts you received from the other teachers and staff members. "Finally" you say placing the last bag on the floor of the nursery, you spend the next 45 minutes unpacking bags and putting the gifts away. You sit of the sofa curled up with a bowl of steaming hot mac and cheese with extra mozzarella melted over the top and two slices of buttered bread watching straight from the heart while waiting for Dennis to come home. "Babe I'm home" Dennis calls from the door, "I'm in here babe" you shout back from your spot on the sofa. He walks in and see's you all curled up on the sofa and smiles at you, "You look comfy, how was your last day?" he asks as he sits down beside you wrapping you in his arms kissing you on the cheek, "I am very comfy even more now that I'm in your arms, it was amazing babe you should see the beautiful hamper the kids in my class got me and all the beautiful gifts I got from other teachers and staff members, they threw me a mini surprise baby shower, it was so thoughtful of them" you gush as you told Dennis all about your day, "That was so sweet of them babe, you can show me all the gifts in a bit" he said.

When he sat down you could feel the erection bursting at the seams of Dennis' trousers. You pushed the thought out of your head for a second. "I'm just going to put my bowl in the sink, I'll be right back" you say as you stood up purposely brushing off his erection slightly and walked to the kitchen. As soon as you turned the corner to the kitchen, Dennis quickly removed his shirt and pulled himself free of the restraints of his pants, sighing in relief as his hand wrapped around his very hard throbbing dick, he thought it would be a good idea to use the cock-ring that you had bought him for Valentines day to spice things up a bit before the baby came along. He pulled over on his way home and slipped the ring on himself, hoping you would be in the mood for some fun when he got home.

He closed his eyes and pictured your lips around him, sucking him off as if he were an ice-cream. He bit his lip as he tried to suppress a moan. When you came back your mouth dropped open in shock as you say your fiance sprawled out on the sofa wanking himself off. The sight of him made you bite your lip and your panties dampen, god he looked good enough to eat you thought to yourself as you made your way towards him. He was so engrossed with pleasure that he didn't notice you standing right in front of him. "Need a hand with that big boy" you cooed seductively in his ear and tugged at his earlobe.

His eyes shot open and his head snapped up in your direction, he was panting heavily and sweat was beginning to form on his body, he just nodded as he bit his lip unable to speak from the pleasure. You drop to your knees in front of him, take his throbbing erection from his grasp and pump him slowly, you bring you mouth closer bringing the tip of his now oozing cock past your lips and suck gently, taking him deeper in your mouth bobbing your head slightly, you release him with a pop running your tongue teasingly along the bulging vein of the underneath of his cock, "Shit babe that feels amazing, don't stop" he moans out tangling his fingers in your hair.

You take him back in your mouth hollowing your cheeks bobbing you head up and down quickly, deepthroating him, you gag when you feel his tip hit the back of your throat, causing your throat to clench around him, "Shit babe do that again, that felt ama-" you cut him off before he could finish his sentence, gagging around him again causing him to buck his hips into your mouth fucking your mouth, you continued to sloppily and harshly suck him off, bringing him closer and closer to the edge, his his thighs began to shake ferociously and you knew he was close to cumming, you hummed around sending vibrations through his sensitive cock, you looked up at him through your eyelashes giving him your most innocent look while massaging his ball and that was it, he was a moaning, panting sweating mess cumming down your throat, a string of profanities along with the most sexiest moans you've ever heard left his mouth as his grip on your hair tightened, you became even more hornier as you watched him crumble at your touch, you made sure to swallow every drop, give him one last suck for good measure before releasing him from you mouth with a POP.

"Shit babe you have no idea how incredible that was" he says grabbing your hands helping you up to stand in front of him and kissing you passionately, tasting himself on your tongue, yous both moan into the kiss never wanting it to stop. "Your turn" he says seductively as he gently lays you down on the sofa, pulling your jeans and panties down your legs in one swift motion, he kisses from your ankle up you calf, then to the inside of your thigh playfully nipping at your thigh, moving his face to where you needed him the most. You feel his warm wet tongue come in contact with you clit, "Shit right ther-" you were cut off by him harshly sucking on your clit, tracing figure of eight on your clit with the tip of his tongue. He continued his pleasurable assault on your clit, rubbing two fingers up and down your lips coating them in your arousal gently sliding them into you causing you arch your back and moan out his name "Dennis babe please I need more" just as the words left your lips his pace quickened curling his fingers slightly brushing off that sensitive spot inside you making you curl your toes. "Keep going don't stop I'm close" you moaned out your orgasm approached quicker than you would have liking but so intense at the same time, the knot in your stomach tightened "DENNIS OH GOD YES" you practically scream out as your orgasm washed over your body in waves as you convulsed around Dennis' fingers never wanting it to stop, you tugged on his hair causing him to moan against your now very sensitive clit. "Shit babe that was so hot and intense" he said as he pulled away licking the remains of your arousal from lips.

"Stand up and follow me babe" he cooed in you ear as he reached his hands out to help you up, he walked round the back of the sofa and you followed. "Bend over, legs apart" he said in a stern but yet incredibly sexy voice, you bent over the back of the sofa supporting yourself on it with your legs spread wide like you were requested to. "You okay babe ? you comfortable enough?" he questioned in a softer tone than before it amazes you how he can go from dominant to soft and caring in 0.1 seconds. You bit your lip nodding not trusting you voice. "I need to hear it babe I need your consent" he spoke in a deep raspy voice. "Yes" you breathed out barely audible but loud enough for Dennis to hear.

He moved round behind you, admiring the way your back dipped , the curves of your hips and ass as he stroked his hard on biting his lip thinking of all the things me was planning on doing to you. "Have I ever told you babe how fucking sexy you are, pregnancy suits you so well, jesus those hips and that ass and not to mention these gorgeous tits" he says and he leans over you whispering in you ear squeezing you tits and pinching your nipples, tracing his hands over your bump rubbing it protectively as he places light chaste kisses across your shoulder blades and down the middle of your spine and where your back dips just before your ass. He brings his hands to your hips and around to you ass squeezing, spanking you firmly but still taking his time to be loving and caressing, you feel him rub his fingers over your folds teasing your entrance you were just about protest when you felt his fingers being replaced by his warm wet tip oozing with pre-come, he gently pushes into you careful not to hurt you or the baby, once he was fully inside he waited a few seconds to let you adjust before beginning to move.

"Den please do something" you moaned out at the feeling of him filling you up so good and deep, "Shit babe your so tight, hang on if I move yet I'll cum straight away" he moans back. A few seconds later he slowly starts to withdraw only to push straight back in again after a couple of thrusts he begins to set a steady but pleasurable pace, both you and Dennis are a moaning mess, his speed quickens and you can feel your second orgasm approaching, he reaches up grabbing your hair pulling slightly not to much to hurt you just enough to heighten you pleasure. "Shit babe I'm close" you moan out "Me too, cum for me babe, Let the neighbors know who's making you feel this good"he moaned in to your ear, with his words you began to convulse around him, you legs shaking, you began to see stars as you experience the most earth shattering orgasm you've ever had, your orgasm set Dennis off as seconds later you felt his hips begin to stutter as he came with a string of moans falling from his lips, he pulled out of you and watched his cum drip from your folds as after waves of your orgasm crashed through you body, your body still trembling.

"Shit babe I should get you pregnant more often, I don't know about you but that was the most intense and incredible orgasm I've ever had" Dennis panted out still trying to catch his breath, "Me too" was all you could manage to get out as you were also trying to regain yourself. "How about a nice hot shower and curl up in bed for the rest of the day with junk food, take away and movies?" Dennis questioned wrapping his arms around you kissing you on the top of the head, "That sounds perfect babe. That's exactly what yous done for the rest of the day after showering, you's curled up in each others arms watching Halloween movies only leaving the bed to go toilet or answer the door for the takeaway.

***The week of your due date***

The week of your due date had finally arrived to say you were relieved was an understatement, you were crippled with backache, heartburn, sore boobs and horrible pressure from the baby's head being so low but it was all worth it as you know you were going to get a beautiful baby at the end and you were at the finishing line. You sat on the sofa in your pj's with a big cup of hot chocolate resting on your bump the fire blazing, watching The Santa Claus 3 waiting for Dennis to come home. It was his last day until after the New Year and you were so excited to spend time with him over the next few weeks especially since 2 were about to become 3, you were finally going to have a little family and just the thought of that made you smile goofily down at your bump and you felt your little one kick. "Babe I'm home, let the Christmas festivities begin" he shouted as he rounded the the corner stopping in his tracks smiling as he see's you. "Hows my 2 favorite people" he says as he sits down beside you taking a sip of your hot chocolate, "Hey get your own" you pouted "Aww don't be like that babe, how have you been feeling today? " he questioned as he rubbed your bump. "Meh I ache all over and this child of yours is using my bladder as a play toy" you joked "Aww its almost over babe and we'll have him/her in our arms, hopefully before Christmas too" he said as he cuddled up beside you watching the movie.

"I've a great idea babe why don't we make a family of snowmen" Dennis said like a kid in a candy shop as he jumped up off the sofa. You roll your eyes at him "I'm too pregnant, why don't you make them for me" you say with hope in your voice "No babe come on it will be fun, we can then just chill out order take away and watch Christmas movies all night while snuggled up in bed" he says pleading with puppy dog eyes to convince you "Fine" you say giving in to his antics how could you refuse those pleading eyes. A hour and 3 snowmen later you and Dennis make your way back inside to heat up with steaming hot cup of hot chocolate while yous wait for your pineapple pizza to arrive. After the food arrives yous make your way up to the bedroom curl up together pigging out on pizza and other junk food while watching Christmas movies. Halfway through the movie Dennis starts to sing to you. He begins to sing a beautiful Welsh song to you as he's got his arms wrapped around you rubbing your bump staring deeply into your blue eyes with his green ones you feel your heart swells, your eyes begin to water and the baby starts kicking like mad at the sound of Dennis' voice. Dennis beams with happiness as he feels the kicks and starts to tear up himself as he continues to sing, once he's finished you speak up. "That was so incredibly beautiful Den" you say with tears of emotion rolling down your cheeks. "That you sweetheart, I'm glad you liked it" he says gently wiping your tears away and sweetly kissing your lips. Things started to get quite heated and handsy before you knew it you were naked on top of Dennis grinding your hips into him boxer covered erection, just as you bent down to kiss him you felt a pop and a gush of water. Halting your actions you cautiously get off Dennis. "Are you okay babe ?" he says noticing your change in mood all of a sudden. "Don't freak out, but I think my waters just broke" you say calmly "What are you sure babe, will the baby be okay its not your due date yet" he says slightly panicked but then realizes he has to remember his paramedic training and stay calm and keep you calm. "I'm sorry Den but my waters broke on you" you say to him slightly amused and embarrassed. "Seriously you peed on me ?"he questioned while chuckling, "No Den my waters broke, I did not piss myself you sat in defense, "Relax babe I was joking, lets get you to the hospital yeah?" he said while getting up and getting changed "yes please babe " you say as you get your hospital bag from the nursery and wait for Dennis to find his car keys.

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****The Welsh song he sings to you****

Just as you and Dennis arrived at the hospital and were checking in you were hit with an overwhelming contraction, you doubled over in pain and grab Dennis' hand squeezing for dear life, "Shit babe that hurts" he says and you continue to squeeze "Well this ain't a walk in the park either you know " you replied through gritted teeth while you rub your bump trying to sooth the pain, the pain eventually eases enough for you to stand back up straight and hopefully finish getting checked in and into a room before the next contraction hits. Dennis stands there rubbing his hand trying to get the sensation back in it after you have nearly broke it.

****10 Hours later****

"Deep breaths babe, in through the nose and out through the mouth, you got this I promise I'm right here beside you, five more minutes of pain for a lifetime of happiness, 3 more big pushes " Dennis encourages. You close your eyes and take a deep breath and push 3 more times and that's when you hear the sweetest sound you've every heard, the sound of your son crying, you open your eyes and are met with the sight of the most beautiful, precious little bundle of joy. You turn to Dennis to who is a blubbering mess while staring you your son. Would you like to do the honors daddy the midwife says while handing Dennis a scissors, Dennis just nods and cuts the cord. "I love you so much babe" he says kissing you sweetly while the midwife cleans and wraps up the baby " Happy Christmas Daddy" the midwife says as she hands Dennis your son. "Hey there little one, your absolutely beautiful and perfect just like your mammy" he coos down at him with tears in his eyes. You look to your fiance and your son with tears streaming down your face and your heart swells at how perfect your little family is, nothing could every compare to this moment and how you feel right now. "How about we let mammy have a hold hmm" he says as he passes the baby to you, you look down to him and he opens his eyes and looks up to you, "Hi there my sweat pea, I'm your mammy" you say, just then the midwife asks you's have a name picked for him. "Ryleigh Andrew Severs" you's both say at the same looking to each other and down to your son she just nods and writes it down. "Congratulations to yous both, he's perfect and can I just say he's officially the first baby I've every delivered on Christmas Day" the midwife says and leaves the room to let yous have some family time together. "Happy Christmas Daddy" you say to Dennis "Happy Christmas to you too Mammy" Dennis says back. Our perfect little Christmas present.

THE END

Part 3 coming soon!!!!

#taron egerton smut #thesmoke #dennis severs #pregnancy #smut

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