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#Drunk History
lesdemonium · 2 days ago
I'm giving my best friend a "high history" deep dive into r-colored vowels and dipthongs that he SO did not ask for
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dcdoesart · 4 days ago
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My submission for the @watcherfanzine :)
Hope it makes you guys feel hungry!
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halcooper · 6 days ago
Do you ever watch something and all of a sudden see its the source of a popular meme and you're just like 😮😮😮
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1am thoughts about music
You wake up in the morning and start to listen to a new playlist, suddenly, start to pay attention to how nice that's new music feels, how excited make you feel and how relatable sounds to you.
Next day, you wake up and the first music come to mind is that one you listened yesterday, so, without notice, you gonna listen that music over and over to day's even week's, and your thought at this moment is you never ever will found better music then that...
But then the day's goes by, and you are listening to that only music with less frequency, start's to get bored and start's to pay attention the fails and how annoying to your ear's some part's appear's. No excited at all like used to be.
So you wake up in the morning and start to listen to a new playlist, suddenly, starts to pay attention to how nice that's new music feels,...
And some people still believe in monogamy.
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eatember · 11 days ago
Hey history tumblr, is Petra like ancient Las Vegas?
Like did trade have to go through Petra or did trade want to go through Petra?
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anatomy-lesson · a month ago
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“Toronto Broker Fined $4,000, Jailed In Exchange Case,” Toronto Star. March 28, 1941. Page 44. ----- ‘Tantamount to Smuggling,’ Says Cadi Sentencing Andrew Dand ---- HINDER WAR EFFORT ---- ‘D’ Police Court at the City Hall, Magistrate Gullen ‘You will be fined $4,000 or 18 months and in addition you will go to jail for one month,’ so Magistrate F. C. Gullen told Andrew Dand, Toronto broker. He appeared for sentence on charges of exporting and importing securities and cash between Canada and the United States, contrary to regulations of foreign exchange control board.
The accused imported and exported securities and cash on a large scale, without a permit. ‘It is tantamount to smuggling and the transactions ran into thousands of dollars and this practice does hinder our war effort,’ his worship stated.
‘It is a serious charge and brokers must be careful. The only way to stop it, is to impose a reasonably severe sentence,’ remarked J. Bobinette, special crown prosecutor.
‘I agree my client should have been more careful. He is a broker and all he made out of the transactions was commissions,’ ssaid T. B. Horkins, defence counsel.
Evidence heard last week showed accused exported and imported securities over a period of 10 months, J. M. Fell, inspector, stated the imports in U.S. funds were valued at $175,297 and in Canadian funds, $249.567. The gross profit being $74,270.’ ‘Je lost $23,000 on exports, leaving a net profit in Canadian money of $51,000,’ he said.
Mr. Horkins stated the real culprit was the broker with whom his client worked in Detroit. ‘He is he one who made most of the money,’ counsel concluded.
‘This section of the city is becoming almost a menace,’ said the magistrate, in the case of Ben Wong, manager of an Elizabeth St. restaurant. He pleaded guilty of having liquor illegally in the cafe.
‘There is too much of this in this section of the city, remarked Crown Attorney Bolins.
‘That may be so, but do not take it out on my client,’ said Mr. Horkins, defence counsel. Wong was fined $200 and costs or one month.
Two Chinese Fined Provincial Constables James Bartlett and A. Shaughnessy said they visited the restaurant yesterday. ‘I asked him if he had any liquor and he said he had none,’ testified Bartlett. ‘In a hide we found four part bottles of liquor. His permit since June 24 showed purchases of $700,’ the officer said.
Entering the Elizabeth St. store of Fo Wah, Shaughnessy and Bartlett said they seized 2 bottles of liquor. Wah was taken in for having illegally pleaded guilty, and was fined $200 and costs or one month.
Shaughnessy said accused’s permit showed purchases of $458 from August last. ‘Far too much liquor on business premises,’ remarked Magistrate Gullen.
William G. Foster pleaded guilty of careless driving after a collision on St. Clair Ave. W., early today.
‘He had been drinking and was not in a fit condition to drive,’ said P.C. Percy Fleming. Accused said he had just arrived from Saskatchewan with a load of horses and had just taken delivery of a new car in Oshawa. ‘I am a car dealer,’ he added.
‘We take horses in on cars and bring the horses down here to sell. It’s kind of different driving down here than on the prairies. We have more room out there,’ said Foster. He was fined $25 and costs or 15 days.
Sent to Trial in Car Death Frank Griffiths was charged with dangerous driving on University Ave., March 21, in connection with the death of John Edward Erwing. Crown Attorney Norman Borins announced his intention of porceeding by indictment.
Accused, through Defence Counsel Frank Callaghan, elected summary trial.
Miss B. Steer said she saw a man walking north on the roadway a short distance from the curb. ‘I saw a car coming and I said to my sister. ‘Look! That man is going to get hit!’
A moment later she heard ‘the smack’ and saw the man lying on the roadway. fter about 20 minutes the man was removed in an ambulance, she said.
‘On the evidence of Miss Steer there is evidence the driver of the car failed to keep a proper look out,’ said Mr. Borins.
‘It would appear there was a clear line of vision for the driver,’ said Magistrate Gullen.
‘There is no evidence of speed, no evidence of carelessness. It was at night,’ said Mr. Callaghan. ‘There is evidence of civil negligence - yes, but not criminal.’
John Neal, police automotive expert, said he found blood 20 feet from the curb, and headlight glass 30 feet south, and in the middle of the street. It did not appear conceivable the blood and glass could have been connected with the same accident,’ said the officer. Brakes horses, lights and steering-gear were in good order, he added.
He found no skid marks, he said. This was an indication that speed was moderated, he admitted.
‘He insisted the man stepped out from behind a parked car and gave him no opportunity,’ Neal said of accused. This, he added, was not consistent with the pool of blood 20 feet from the curb.
‘Liability should be determined by a higher court,’ said Magistrate Gullen.
Mr. Callaghan contended more witnesses should be called so the crown put Alfred Vout in the box.
Mr. Vout said he was driving behind Griffiths at 25 miles an hour and saw the latter stop suddenly. Witness said accused was driving five feet out from cars parked at the curb.
‘Now the case is stronger,’ said Mr. Borins. ‘The man is driving 25 miles an hour with good brakes and should have seen him and stopped.’
Magistrate Gullen finally decided to send the case on for trial. ---- 60 DAYS EACH FOR TRIO --- ‘A’ Police Court at the City Hall, Judge O’Connell. Sankey Hiltz, John Izett, and George Moffatt, stood outside a Queen St. E. store, and when one of them grabbed a windbreaker form the display rack, all three ran away together, Harry Cooper owner, testified.
Det. Charles Martin, who investigated, said he found Hilltz carrying the windbreaker under his coat. Judge O’Connell convicted all three on a joint charge of theft, and sentenced each to 60 days.
Leo. William, Edward and Walter Mazda each faced a charge of theft and another of receiving. The crown’s request for a remand to April 4 was granted and each gave surety bail of $500.
Murray McLaughlin, who pleaded guilty of stealing four pairs of binoculars and eight pairs of sunglasses, was sentenced to four months in jail.
‘Accused was employed as a messenger by an optical company,’ Det. James Crone said. ‘When he was going out to deliver legitimate messages he would take some of those articles with him,’ he testified.
According to Crown Counsel Fred Malone, accused had several previous convictions for theft and shopbreaking. Charge Misrepresentation Facing a charge of obtaining merchandise worth $799 from a plumbing supply form on Elizabeth St., by false pretences, John Pinneo was committed for trial.
Abraham Silverberg, stated that last September, accused, representing himself as Staff Captain John Pinneo of the barracks at London, Ont., had ordered a boiler, which was delivered by transport to an address in London.
Morris Silverberg, a partner, stated Pinneo had ordered other merchandise by long-distance telephone, including radiators, piping, and various fittings, on various dates up until Dec. 9, all of which were shipped to London.
‘What is the false representation that is alleged?’ asked the court.
‘The representation that he was purchasing goods for the army,’ replied Mr. Malone.
‘I finally located the accused at Aylmer,’ Morris Silverberg continued. ‘He told me everything had been used on his own private jobs. We later found the address in London to which the goods were shipped was not a barracks but a private home. When I saw him Aylmer he was in civilian clothes.’
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thegeekcloud · 12 days ago
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Lin Manuel Miranda | | Drunk History
Or Lin being cute while drunk af.
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anatomy-lesson · a month ago
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“Party Before Marriage Is Plea In Liquour Case,” Toronto Star. April 5, 1941. Page 02. ----- Found 36 Persons, Three of Them Drunk, Says Policeman --- FINE $25 OR 30 DAYS --- No. 4 Court, Magistrate Prentice City Hall. Eddie Brooker admitted allowing drunkenness in a house on D’Arcy St., and was assessed $25 or 30 days. He appeared in No. 4 police court today.
‘In company with P.C. Neeley I entered the house at 2:30 this morning,’ related P. C. McNaughton. “We found 36 persons, three of whom were drunk.’
‘He is being married and his friends were having a party,’ said Austin Ross, defence counsel.
A fine of $50 or 30 days was imposed on Agnes Bell after hse was convicted of permitting drunkeness in a house on Ontario place.
‘Three persons were in the house drinking wine, two of them were drunk,’ testified P. C. Arthyr Copewell.
She admitted a conviction some months ago on a charge of having liquor illegally.
Fined $20 or 30 days for having liquor in an illegal place were Morris Guay and Vito Sandermo. Pando Gaudochi, found on the street with half a bottle of liquor, was fined $10 or 10 days.
P.Cc. Wm. Kelso arrested Peter Simpson on St. Clarens Ave. with a part bottle of wine. He pleaded guilty to having it illegally.
‘These men are a nuisance around the district,’ said P. C. Kelso.
Simpson was fined $10 or 10 days. --- 13 DRUNKS GET OFF --- No. 1 Police Court, Magistrate Forsyth, City Hall Thirteen of the 19 charges with being drunk, as first offenders, were remanded for sentence and allowed to go in No. 11 police court today. Lawrence Lally was fined $50 or two months; Antti Kallioinan, Fred Vinccent, J. Foster and Michael Fallon were each fined $10 or 10 days. Another man was not deemed in a fit condition to be tried and was remanded to Monday.
At the request of J. C. M. German, special crown prosecutor, Daniel Smith, charged with unlawful possession of drugs, was remanded until Tuesday. No bail was mentioned as accused is now serving a term in Guelph.
Earl Cubit, 17, and Norman Higgins, pleaded guilty to a charge of taking an auto without consent of Nels Blita, its owner. ‘They took the car and drove to Hamilton where they were arrested,’ said Detective Holmes. ‘They were on their way to St. Catharines to look for work.’
‘Both have been in trouble before,’ pointed out Crown Counsel W. O. Gibson.
‘This sort of thing can’t go on,’ said his worship. ‘Three months definite and three months indefinite.’ ---- RAISED ROW IN HOTEL --- County Police Court, Magistrate Keith, County Building John B. Curnew and Frank C. Smith pleaded guilty to charges of drunkenness before Magistrate Keith in county police court and were each fined $10 and costs or ten days. 
Constable R. McNair of the New Toronto police said that both accused had been creating a disturbance at a hotel. ‘I found them weaving and staggering along the street,’ he said. Both said they were on the way to Port Colborne to join a ship.
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anatomy-lesson · a month ago
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“Jail For Ring Theft,” Toronto Star. April 8, 1941. Page 02. ----- ‘B’ Police Court, at the City Hall, Magistrate Gullen Appearing for sentence on a joint charge of theft of eight diamond rings, property of a downtown jewelry store, Joseph Iseman was sentenced to six months and Gordon D. O’Neill to three months.
Last week Thos. Philpot, 17, charged with assaulting E. G. Sampson, a member of the air force, stated he had no knowledge of doing so and claimed he had been taken home drunk that night and had been seen by two members of the military police in his bed, and his bands had borne no marks of injury.
‘He will be sentenced to 30 days,’ said Magistrate Gullen.
When it was explained that Eliott Porter, a soldier, had merely jumped on a stolen bicycle, left leaning against a Queen St. W. hotel early April 4, on a dare that he couldn’t ride, the charge was dismissed. The young soldier, a native of Bridgeport, Conn., showed the court his honorable discharge from the U.S. army.
‘You will go to jail for seven days, your car will be impounded for three months, and your driving permit cancelled for three months,’ his worship told George Edward Ball, convicted of driving an auto on Robinson St. last night while he was intoxicated. ---- DRIVER FINED $110 --- ‘D’ Police Court at the City Hall, Magistrate Browne. ‘He said he just drove around the block and didn’t remember hitting anything,’ testified O.C. Holden. ‘He had been drinking.’
The officer was testifying in the case of M. H. Michelborough on three charges. Two witnesses swore he struck a parked car on Duplex Ave. March 23, and then drove away.
‘I think he was too drunk to know where he was,’ declared Magistrate Browne. Accused, who pleaded guilty to all charges, was fined $50 and costs or 30 days for careless driving, $50 or 30 days for failing to remain at the scene of an accident, and $10 or 10 days for not hvaing a driver’s license.
‘I asked him what happened, and he said he had nothing to worry about because he new saw the man,’ declared P. C. Wright of Floyd Graham. he was charged with dangerous driving as a the result of an accident Jan. 12, when Sam Harper, T. T.C. switchman, was injured at King and Church Sts. Harper is still in hospital.
P. C. Wright said the traffic light was red. ‘There was a strong odor of liquro on accused’s breath,’ he added.
Accused was convicted and remanded in custody to April 10 for sentence.
--- ‘STRAIGHT LINE TO PEN’ --- County Police Court, Adelaide St., Magistrate Keith. ‘You’re heading in a straight line for Kingston penitentiary,’ warned Crown Counsel Malone as Teddy Rowe, pleaded guilty to two charges of theft and two charges of breaking and entering. He was remanded to April 15 for sentence. James Alex Duncan, 16, charged with Rowe, pleaded guilty to two charges of theft and one of breaking and entering, and was remanded to April 5 for sentence.
Guerney Haggert pleaded guilty of having liquro after being prohibited by the Liquor Control board. He was fined $50 and costs or 30 days.
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angryisokay · 13 days ago
Two Flint city council members are unopposed in re-election and one of them is the fucking crackhead. Is he the least fucked up person from his ward? Is that why no one runs against him? Does his ward just enjoy having a genuinely fucked up person in office to represent them?
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teagrl · 14 days ago
Drunk History with Mara Jade would be amazing! I can see it now during The Last Command: "So while this crazy old Jedi zombie is trying to turn me, there's THIS going on (gestures wildly toward Luke dueling Luuke), which is at once very sexually confusing and arousing. How is anyone supposed to concentrate on turning to the darkside when that is happening RIGHT THERE?"
LOL LOL. “at once very sexually confusing AND arousing.” 
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I feel like that could be such a TTT!Mara mood (possibly a Luke one too, but I don’t think by then he’s much confused by his preferences for hostile chicks, or rather, he shouldn’t be)
The scene where Luke breaks her out and she is her pjs and tosses her datapad at him? I feel like this scene is one of the few that don’t get as much play in fandom.
Her take on “training” at Wayland?
So much fertile field to till.
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blunt-science · 14 days ago
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A replica of the artificial nose worn by Astronomer Tycho Brahe. During an engagement party, he got into a drunken quarrel with a contemporary over who was the better mathematician. They resolved their feud with a sword duel in the dark, in which Brahe lost his nose.
Brahe was not your typical astronomer, with more bizarre anecdotes to his name than just the nose (made of brass or silver, and meticulously glued on with paste).
One of Brahe’s greatest companions was a man named Jeppe who had dwarfism. Brahe believed Jeppe to be psychic, and they would chat together at mealtimes with Jeppe sitting at the foot of Brahe, occasionally receiving morsels of food from the table.
Famously, Brahe also kept a fully grown Elk as a pet, that was known of among many of the nobles in Denmark, but this Elk met a sad end. When a nobleman, so intrigued by the idea of a tame deer, offered a trade for this animal, Brahe broke the news that it had recently died after drinking too much beer and falling down the stairs.
Regardless of Brahe’s personal life, he was an extremely meticulous astronomical observer attaining some of the most accurate results of the era. Although he didn’t specifically make any conclusions on Mars itself, he took on a young assistant by the name of Johannes Kepler. During Brahe’s lifetime, Kepler wasn’t able to see the full extent of the significance of the Mars data that Brahe had collected, as Brahe guarded his results extremely jealousy. But after his death, Kepler used this data to conclude that orbits are not circular like Copernicus had once thought, but in fact elliptical, thus creating the laws for planetary motion.⠀
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thebeckiest · 16 days ago
I don't understand what the thinking behind putting Jimmy Carr in UK Drunk History was. His whole vibe is so wrong for the show. Surely someone in the UK has Derek Waters-style drunk whispering abilities.
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anatomy-lesson · 2 months ago
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“Rainey Takes Count Since Honkey Unseen,” Toronto Star. February 16, 1931. Page 02. ---- With Stolen Car Bumped Into Auto and led - Mystery Introduced ---- Where is ‘Honkey?’ Is there a ‘Honkey?’ Did a ‘Honkey’ steal the car which, with Mervin Raisey at the wheel on the night of November 30, last, crashed into another car on Major St., occupied into another car on Major St., occupied at the time by Lloyd Sullivan. The latter suffered severe injuries, his car being struck ‘midships by the one driven by Rainey.
Acting Patrol Sergeant Jobert made an unsuccessful bit courageous attempt to get Rainey to stop his car by jumping on the running board. He lost Rainey, but when the Rainey car made another crash he got Pat Foley, who was driving in the same car. Rainey, fearing arrest fro driving a car without a license, reckless driving etc., fled the twon and was later arrested in Sarnia.
To-day in men’s police court Rainey faced charges of criminal negligence, theft of a car belonging to F. B. Patterson and stealing license plates it was on the strength of Foley’s statement the morning after the arrest that Detective-Sergeant Winters and Whitelow went after Rainey. The latter told a story about a strange man named ‘Honkey’ allowing him to have the stolen car in return for garage accommodation.
Neither Judge Coatsworth nor Crown Attorney Gibson swallowed the story of the invisible Honkey. More believable was the narrative of Rainey about Foley and he having a few drinks, meeting girls at a hospital, having more drinks, taking the girls home, then having the crash on Major St. The Rainey-driven car was going 50 miles an hour at the time.
‘The whole trouble was caused by the few drinks,’ said Raney’s counsel, E. J. Murphy, M. P. P. Counsel went on to say that when his client Rainey was fifteen, he was knocked off a bicycle by a motorist and suffered head injuries from which apparently he had never quite recovered.
‘Nothing was done to the motorist,’ added Mr. Murphy.
Judge Coastworth gave Rainey from 3 to 12 months for criminal negligence; 6-12 months for ‘receiving’ a stolen car, and discharged Foley on the theft charge.
In the meantime, where is ‘Honkey?’
Dope in Wine!
I suffered drought; was parched with thirst, I ‘mopped’ some liquid fuel, That ‘moonshine’ was the very worst It kicked just like a mule
Such was a plaint of Bernard Keating, one of this morning’s drunks to appear before Magistrate Tinker.
‘It was suppose to be wine, but after a drink or two, I was kocked out. There must have been dope in it,’ said the prisoner with a shudder.
On being sent down for three months, the prisoner turned angirly to Detective-Mulholland and told him he was ‘no gentleman,’ not even an Irish gentleman. Two other respondents, William Phillips and Malcolm Allingham, also went into oblivion for three months, while Edward Keanery, Donald Robertson, and William Wingham, guilty of second offences, were fined $50 or one month. All others of this morning’s congregation of twenty-eight, were sent over to the Salvation Army penitent bench.
Where with quaking limbs they took their places, And made impenitent grimaces.
Bronze Of the heads of hair to appear in the dock to-day, Alex Corbett’s shock took the the prize. It was in a class by itself and had a beautiful permanent wave. No lake or sea ever provided such waves. And the color! And the gleam! The prisoner’s head looked like a great bronze ball on the top of an Indian temple.
‘It’s been dyed,’ said Det. Sergt. Wickett when the owner was charged with vagrancy.
Corbett had come from Sacramento, California, where he had been employed, not in the picture studios, but in saw mill.
Magistrate Tinker, remanded the bronze head until Friday.
Sad Fate On the eve of the ninetieth birthday, Edward Allen asked for 30 days at a place he knows so well, and dislikes so much. However, it’s the only ‘old men’s home’ available.
Got Worst of It Looking little the worse for the reception, Patrol Sergt. Boyd gave them when they and a third, but missing man, resisted arrest on a joint charge of vagrancy. George Marchant and LacLlan McLean turned up to-day for sentence. The police officer had turned the tables upon them charged them with assaulting the police.
‘But they got the worst of it,’ remarked Judge Coatsworth. ‘I hope this will be a warning to all of us. I hope the thrashing the sergeant gave them will do them good.’
‘They are ‘floaters,’ said Crown Attorney Gibson.
The judge allowed them to drift away until the 21st on their own bail.
‘Hands Up!’ Sentenced on Friday last to terms of three and twelve, and six and twelve months, for fraud and forgery, William Lyster, and Richard Herrington decided not to avail themselves of the debatable pleasure of going to Hamilton to face similar charges and metaphorically ‘threw up their hands’ in face of the Hamilton charges. These are the youths who used raised cheques to raise money, bought bus trip tickets, obtained refunds, etc.
Wrong Bone
Some folks would earn a place in life,  And with real glory shine, IF they had not a wishbone Where they ought to have their spine
Such at least, was the tenor of the judge’s comment on Paul Allerton, reappearing for sentence on charges of fraud. A companion in the charges of fraud. A companion in the charges was last week sent down. To-day there was a suggestion that Allerton was really under the influence of a stronger will than his own.
‘Stop, being weak and wishy-washy,’ advised his honor, as he placed the youth on probation for two years.
A Good Haul The police recovered all the watches, ties, socks, red ink, etc. etc., found in the possession of Pete Timko, and had enough to open a small shop, only Timko had stolen the lot from a department store.
He goes on probation for a year.
Eh? ‘Attempted housebreaking?’ ‘What’s that?’ ‘Eh? What say?’ ‘Why, we’d been there before. We thought there’d be a party,’ duetted John Crag and James Mulligan, when charged with attempting to break into a house on Rosemary Ave.
‘They won their case, Deserved to win it; Even the crown opined: There’s nothing in it.’
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13-ontheshore-26 · 17 days ago
i’m heady on the midspring’s night wine
made by the air through my window
it coalesces and drips down my throat
sweet as honey
i barely notice before i begin to choke
is this what it’s like
heroin or molly
ecstasy grass crack
flowing through my veins
i can’t bring myself
to bring myself back
fireflies are my dealers
slipping in between my lips
they infuse the air into my soul
drag it down to my hips
air spreads as sweet and thin as aerosol
i fall back into the night
fall back into the pool
i drown myself in air and water
trapped inside a fishbowl
see my reflection in the surface
damn i almost forgot her
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