#CHEESE AND TOMATO MAY BE EXTRA

[contac]

#NO I'M SERIOUS #CHEESE AND TOMATO MAY BE EXTRA #DON'T GET TAKEN IN BY THIS BAIT AND SWITCH SCAM #vhs #gif #wendy's #1986 #fast food #burger

[crookedkryptonitebeliever]

Best and Worst of Both worlds (part 23)

Tw: Montgomery's really touchy n doesn know what is no

part 24

You were sent home. Because all you wanted to do was collapse on your bed and sleep the night away. The rain makes it extra cozy for you to cuddle under the blankets. Once your head hit the pillow, you were out like a light.

You woke up to your phone buzzing. But it isn't Yves this time. It's Evangeline.

You picked it up and brought it to your ear, giving her a groggy 'hello'?

"Wake up, damn it! You're going to miss class again, daddy's already waiting outside for you!" You let out a yelp as you heard loud honking from outside.

You whined as you got out of bed, throwing a mini tantrum by stomping out of your room. You wish that Yves was here, he would have woken you up on the right side of bed every day. Yves would have been gentle and stress-free, he would have stroked your hair and given you soft kisses as an alarm. There wouldn't be any loud noises or sudden surprises.

You grumbled as you got yourself ready for the day.

__

This time, you remembered to bring the premade meals Yves prepared in the fridge. Sharing yesterday's lunch with Evangeline while you ate the fresher one today. Mr. Jones fussed with you about wearing sunscreen, so now you're protected from the sun.

Yves only sent you a singular text this morning at 8:30am.

"Good morning, my dear. May you have a lovely day, (name)."

No reminders, no updates about what he did or saw, no requests to contact him. You brushed it off as him being busy, deciding to favour Evangeline's attention over his. You didn't even reply to his only message, thinking that Yves would mind too much about it.

"Mmm! This is delicious, Sir Yves is a really great cook!" Complimented Evangeline as she took another bite of the cold wrap. You're eating your own meal that has specific instructions to microwave it, luckily there are some that you could use in the student's lounge.

"Aww, he's such a sweet partner too. Look!" She showed you a message left by Yves, that was attached to the wrapper of yesterday's meal.

"Lunch for (full name)- Monday.

Meal: Turkey and Apricot Wrap. Do not heat. Eat as it is.

Ingredients: lactose-free cream cheese, apricot reserves, wheat tortillas, shredded turkey, spices, arugula. Contains gluten.

Remember to put on sunscreen. There is no need to be nervous as I know you will do well on your first day. I will be thinking of you always. Call me if you want to talk about your day, I will listen.

Love,

Yves"

You never realized that there was a whole paragraph plastered on its wrapping. So you decided to check your container for any similar texts. Sure enough, you found one.

"Lunch for (name)- Tuesday

Meal: Coq au vin. Microwave with lid partially open, 3-4 minutes. Be careful as the contents will be hot.

Ingredients: Chicken, pearl onions, garlic, spices, pinot noir red wine, button mushrooms, bacon, butter, tomato paste, flour, homemade beef stock, tagliatelle. Contains gluten and lactose.

Well done, my dear (name). You have reached your second day. I hope you find my cooking so far to be appetizing, your thoughts would be very much appreciated. As always, do not hesitate to contact me if you need me. I will always be there for you. Be careful not to burn your tongue.

Love,

Yves"

She gushed over today's note. "That's so cute! I can see why you're into older men now."

You lightly punched her on the shoulder and laughed along.

You and her were eating peacefully, now that you have exhausted all the conversation topics. Both of you ate in silence, enjoying the food from Yves.

But then, all of the sudden, a pair of hands clamped down onto your shoulders. Causing you to shriek and jump in your seat.

"Scared ya, didn't I?" You felt his stubble scraped against your skin that has been softened by the skincare routine Yves set for you.

Colour drain from Evangeline's and your faces.

You tried swatting him away, but he took a deep sniff of your hair, inhaling all your scent. You protested as he buries his nose into your head, Montgomery is really loud in his sniffing. "You smell so good..." He mumbled lazily as he held you from behind.

Evangeline stood up and pried him away from you, but only successfully to a certain extent.

"Fine, fine. I'll save the lovey-dovey stuff for later when you're easier to win over." He massaged your shoulders with his thumb. You frown because he doesn't seem to understand that his strength is too much, you think you will bruise.

"You are hurting (name)." Evangeline firmly told him off. To your shock though, he immediately lets go and stroke your hair in an unnaturally, tender way.

"Oh! I'm so sorry darlin'... You're so soft and sweet, I sure forgot I can be a damn brute sometimes." You looked up at him and there was a considerable amount of guilt being expressed on his face.

He ignored Evangeline and invited himself to your table, sitting on the chair adjacent to yours.

"Here, I got us lunch."

Montgomery sets down a paper bag that has an imposing fast food logo printed on it. The smell of piping hot french fries and meat patties wafted throughout the air. He began unpacking it, placing a thin, cardboard box containing a large burger in front of you. Even though you're clearly eating the well crafted meal Yves made.

"And I didn't forget about yer rich friend." He took out a much smaller sandwich, wrapped in wax paper. Albeit begrudgingly.

"It ain't like she's gonna appreciate it anyways..." He muttered under his breath.

"Thank you very much, Sir Montgomery." Although she was kind and friendly in her response, you sensed a bit of animosity radiating from her. Montgomery seems to pick it up faster than you and tenfold the intensity.

He shot her a dirty look before going back to showcasing what he bought.

"I got ya' your favourite soda in a jumbo cup." He carefully pulled out a huge plastic vessel containing an ice-cooled liquid, you can hear it noisily sloshing and fizzing. It looks intimidating to say the least; you definitely can't finish it even with the help of Evangeline.

"You gotta fuel your brain somehow through those soul killin' classes." He stuck his hand back into the bag.

"I got ya' a cookie, a cupcake, some fries aaand..." He rummaged through the bag and pulled out something so small, that it's entirely engulfed by his hand. "A nice, little gift for ya."

He smiled and presented to you in a closed fist. You shakily uncurled his rough fingers off his palm to reveal... a nice little keychain?

"They said it's a limited edition! So I got ya one, I saw a bunch of youngins' goin' crazy over it. Must be the newest, hottest thing among the kids these days."

You sucked your lips in and stared at it, wide eye. You're not admitting it to anyone, but you secretly longed for it ever since you saw a promotional advertisement on your social media feed. You knew back then you could never afford it because it's $30 for this piece of metal alloy and you had to buy a meal to be eligible to get it.

However, you're not fooling anyone. Montgomery and Evangeline can see how obvious you desperately wanted it upon presentation. Evangeline shook her head, now knowing that her friend is susceptible to predatory marketing tactics. Montgomery grinned from ear to ear, knowing that he could take advantage of this situation.

Before your twitchy fingers could grab it, Montgomery pulled it away and dangled it over your head.

"Where's my thanks?" He teasingly brought his face closer to yours.

You quickly mumbled some words of gratitude before trying to reach for that desired toy. He laughed at your pathetic attempt to grab it, he's too tall for you and you're too unathletic to hop far.

Evangeline almost shot up when she saw his other hand hovering around your waist. Montgomery noticed this reaction of hers and decided to place it on the table, where you and her could see.

"I only accept gratitude in kisses or phone numbers." He pressed his forehead against yours while smirking cockily.

You sat back down. Despair surfaced in your eyes as you went back to eating the coq au Vin.

"Huh? You don't wanna take it?" You shook your head and did not say a word more. The conversation is over and it's not worth it for a piece of overpriced trash.

Montgomery's smile dropped and he turned his focus to Evangeline, who simply gave him a polite, but smug smile.

"You know, it isn't a gift if you expect something in return." Evangeline innocently commented, unwrapping her burger. "It's a transaction now."

Montgomery looked away and paid no mind to her words.

She continued to jab at him verbally.

"So... is your relationship with (name)... transactional? Are you their sugar daddy?"

Anger flashed on his face as he whipped his head to Evangeline. She grinned toothily as she felt a sense of accomplishment by striking a nerve in Montgomery.

"Hey, you watch your mouth, spoiled brat." He hissed through a clenched jaw while pointing menacingly at her.

"I'm just asking a question, sir. It really does seem like you're doing all these seemingly nice gestures, just to get something back." She batted her eyelashes and pouted.

"Shut your trap, you ain't know nothin' about our relationship." Montgomery's veins are starting to show, you cower in the corner, staring at Evangeline and silently pleading her not to go on. But all she did was give you a reassuring look, mixed with a devilish one.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to offend sir. You're right, I don't know anything about your relationship with (name). That's why, I'm asking! I want to educate myself, so I can do better!" She spoke in the most fake performative tone ever, you could tell she was doing this on purpose to rile Montgomery up.

"You ask too many questions, Goldilocks. Ya' need to mind ya' own business." Montgomery started gritting his teeth and balling his fists.

"I'm not judging! I promise. There isn't anything wrong with having a transactional relationship, I think it's a good thing we can choose how to define our-"

"I was just kiddin', Baby." Montgomery cooed at you. Simultaneously cutting Evangeline off.

He fixed the keychain onto the zipper of your bag. "You ain't need to give anything back. I'm doin' all these because that's what a good man would do for their partners." He ruffled your hair.

Montgomery glared at Evangeline who is now having a self-congratulatory grin on her blemish-free face.

"God, y'all rich people sound the same." He grumbled, taking out his own burger and began eating.

"Thank you! We take our speech classes very seriously." That earned a scoff from Montgomery.

She hummed and tapped her chin. Brewing up more ways to mess with Montgomery.

While she took her sweet time, you finished your meal from Yves. You're not hungry anymore, so you didn't touch the food Montgomery brought.

Of course, he noticed it. "Yer food is gonna get cold, soggy fries are the worst." He tipped the bag so you would have easier access to its contents. "Dig in, sweetheart. Ain't nothin' to be shy about. They're all for ya'."

You declined, saying that you're full.

"Aw, come on. You gotta eat, you're growin'! You need your nutrients and-"

"Aren't you a bit too old to be sitting with us?" Evangeline crossed her legs and watched him intently, her pupils dilated out of mischief and curiosity. He groaned and rolled his eyes at her.

"I'm not playin' with you. Shut up." He snarled while he opened your burger box for you to eat out of.

"But sir! You're--"

Montgomery slammed his fist on the table.

"I'm grown, they're grown, you're grown. Age ain't nothin' but a number at this point. We're all adults here, you better start actin' like one, ya' little shit." He rose from his chair and made himself look bigger to intimidate Evangeline into stopping. But she persisted with that irritatingly confident smirk of hers.

"Hmm. I wouldn't conflate legality with morality. (Name) and I are still very young, after all. I'm sure you're wise and mature, it comes with age. We can learn a lot from you, sir!" Her tone became increasingly condescending and mocking, her baby blues bore holes into Montgomery's dark eyes.

You could see his lower eyelid twitching out of fury. Your friend is definitely going to get pummeled into a pulp if she doesn't back down. But she either refused to heed your quiet warnings or is oblivious to it.

"Listen here, you piece of--"

He was interrupted by an alarm blaring from his back pocket. Montgomery fished it out and took a look at his phone screen.

He frowned, grumbling incoherently under his breath as he began packing up.

"You were saying? And, where are you going--"

"To work! God damn! You're fuckin' annoying!" He exclaimed at her. All Evangeline did was maintain her straight posture and sweet smile.

"Aw. I'm sorry to hear that. Could you please tell me what I did wrong? I only wanted to learn..." He ignored her completely and whipped out his wallet. Montgomery pulled out two $20 notes and stuffed it into your bag. The man made sure to zip it up, so it wouldn't slip out.

"Treat yourself to somethin' nice after class. I'll be late, so don't wait up- go home with goldie, it ain't that safe to use the bus at night. Unless you wanna give me your number..." The man looked at you with hopeful eyes. You shook your head and he rolled his eyes in annoyance.

"That's so sweet of you! Giving (name) some money to spend, just like a sugar daddy would!" She clapped her hands in excitement.

"Shut. Up." He pointed his index finger at her. Evangeline gave him Jazz hands and an open-mouth smile. Then, Montgomery turned to you.

"You gotta pick better friends, baby." He kissed you on the forehead before you could react. Cringing at how his stubble would scratch you and his hair leaving a mild greasy residue on your skin. His lips were dry and leathery, the experience was disgusting to you.

You let out a shout and tried your best to shove him away. But all you did was make him sway a little.

"Bye honey, I'll see you around." He gave you a brief, affectionate pinch on the cheek before taking off.

You and Evangeline looked at the vast number of food items he left for you. Neither of you took a bite out of anything.

You asked her if she wanted to bring it back home. She shook her head.

You decided to pack them up for your housemates instead, hopefully gaining some of their favour while Yves is away.

Evangeline wrapped her own untouched burger back up and dumped it into the paper bag.

You felt a buzz in your pocket. So you fished it out to see what was causing it.

A text from Yves was displayed on your notifications.

"I miss you."

You deem it as something unimportant, just a random thought that your boyfriend opt to share just for the sake of sharing. Totally not hinting you to call him back. So you turned your phone off and returned your device back to your pocket.

Your class is in 10 minutes anyways, you and Evangeline better hurry and wrap up soon.

#yandere #yandere x reader #yandere oc #yandere male #yandere concept #tw yandere #yandere x you #yandere oc x reader #oc yves #male yandere oc x reader #oc Montgomery #oc evangeline

[sunny-reis]

같이 꿈을 꾸고 싶어 - dream with you

pairing: huh yunjin x reader

synopsis: an *actually* short oneshot about escapism and yunjin

tags: gender-neutral reader but all of this is implied to be sapphic to some extent (girl in red mentions 🤯). i don't know interpret it as whatever. extremely descriptive paragraphs abt the setting and yunjin? gay as hell. reader lives and goes to college in massachusetts. don't ask why (i do not know. have fun going to mit i guess.)

word count: 932

author's note: YURRRRR i wrote this half-asleep and feeling sapphic as FUCKKKKK enjoy

“massachusetts is such a stupid place to go to college.”

you raise a curious eyebrow at the comically focused yunjin splayed across your far-too-small dorm bed, flipping mindlessly through one of the many books you possess with scrunched eyebrows and a strawberry lollipop in hand. the small speaker perched atop the bedframe plays your “chill” playlist on shuffle at a relatively loud volume as your roommate isn't present, the strumming of an acoustic guitar and her unabashed humming filling the room amid the quiet. it’s a comfortable silence, nothing but the occasional flip of a page from yunjin, the scribbling (and rub of an eraser) from you, the soft pitter-patter of the rain on the window adjacent to your bed, and girl in red.

“and why is that?” you ask. all she gives you is a shrug.

“the drive to see you is stupidly long, and honestly? boston isn't even that interesting of a city to be worth it.”

“not even to see me?”

“yeah, no,” she elbows you with a small giggle, “definitely not.”

you roll your eyes, shaking your head and looking back at your notebook. the colorful pastel stationery strewn all over your table does nothing to give the illusion of a put-together student; you sigh, folding your arms and laying your head down. there's no use focusing on work when you're so distracted. by what, you can't pinpoint, but it must have something to do with the way yunjin’s humming is all you can hear and the way her hair falls over her shoulder barely covered by the flannel she has on. it definitely isn't the way marks on her nose stand out despite the bright makeup on her face, or the way her glasses sit too perfectly on the bump or her nose, or the way her cheeks flush a rosy pink when she looks up to see you lost in her eyes.

her presence slips into every crack and crevice in your heart.

“‘whatcha looking at?” she asks. you blink, devoid of any thought for a short while until she waves a puzzled hand in front of your eyes, snapping you out of your trance.

“hello? earth to [y/n], you there?” you nod, sitting up to match the yunjin now resting her head on her arms on your desk. she stares up at you, eyes starry and wide; many say they're the windows of the soul, but right now, you're unable to tell a thing. it's terrifying – you swallow the thought that she may be weirded out by your not-so-subtle starstruck, longing gazes.

yunjin stands up after a moment of silence, stretching her arms and suppressing a yawn. you check the analog clock on the wall that reads 6:43.

“we should go get dinner, i’m so hungry i can't focus.” you say, clearing your throat. she gives you a small smile.

“i was just about to say that! i’m starving.”

“i’ll drive.” yunjin nods. you don't need words to say you’re going to your special place, a small cafe a 15-minute drive away from campus. neither of you are impartial to making the short walk in the rain, but it's always been a tradition of yours to drive and listen to the same music on the same route.

the rain stops by the time the two of you get your food (a cup of tomato soup and crackers for you, and a turkey-ham sandwich with extra cheese for yunjin – it's always been the same. of course, the two of you always end up getting snacks from the food hall anyways, but there's sentiment to the consistency). unlike before, though, you decide to eat at the park; and so here you are, rocking on the uncomfortably small rubber swings and conversing peacefully amid the handful of children messing around on the playground. it's filling, how content yunjin looks – your crackers are left untouched as you catch yourself staring at her again, unable to break free of the captivating siren’s song of her humming and serenity.

“penny for your thoughts?” she asks abruptly, clearly having caught onto the cacophany in your head. you hate it when she does that.

“not much, i guess.” you shrug.

“oh come on, don't give me that,” she raises an eyebrow, “i’ve known you for years, you can't hide from me.”

“i dunno, i guess i'm just … turbulent?” and there begins the monologue.

everything pours out. yunjin watches, face falling at the harsh words you use to demonize yourself for feeling the way you do; falling in love isn't a crime, no matter whether your feelings are reciprocated or not. she holds back the urge to laugh at the way you neglect to think about her feelings. there are so many fleeting gazes and sleepless, longing-filled nights you haven't seen – she feels the exact same as you.

after your spiel and a number of apologies, yunjin clasps your hands in hers. your eyes widen, looking down as if avoiding her gaze will soften the blow.

“stop tearing yourself down for being human, [y/n]. i promise you, even if i didn't feel the same, it wouldn't be worth punishing yourself for being in love!” she cries, grasping your now-shaking hands tighter. she continues, wiping the occasional tear that falls from your eyes with a soft touch. she's never appeared to be an angel, a heavenly being, more than she does now.

words aren't needed to express how giddy you are when she spells out her feelings for you, topping it all off with a small kiss on the nose.

#yunjin #le serafim #works #yunjin oneshots #yunjin x reader #le sserafim imagines #le sserafim oneshots #yunjin imagines #le sserafim x reader #fics #oneshots #Spotify

[mokkkki]

deadpool's chimichanga recipe <3 

this is the guide for the chimichangas wade makes in chapter 38 of the tangled web we weave, and it happens to be something ive been making these past months, so i thought id share the recipe <3

this recipe was originally gotten from my cousin, and i experimented and changed it over time. i am in no way a chef. but deadpool is, so please enjoy!

ingredients for the chimichanga filling:

1 pound ground beef (you can marinate it overnight in in a mixture of lime juice, garlic, and your favorite spices) 

1 small onion, finely chopped

2 cloves garlic, minced

1 red bell pepper, diced

1 green bell pepper, diced

3 jalapeño pepper, seeded and minced (3 cause i like it spicy! adjust to your spice preference)

1 teaspoon chili powder

1 teaspoon cumin

1/2 teaspoon paprika

salt and pepper, to taste

1 cup black beans, drained and rinsed

1 cup corn kernels (i prefer fresh, but frozen also works)

1 cup shredded cheddar cheese

vegetable oil, for frying

ingredients for the guacamole:

2 ripe avocados, peeled and pitted

1/2 small onion, finely chopped

1 small tomato, diced

1 clove garlic, minced

1 jalapeño pepper, minced (adjust to your spice preference)

juice of 1 lime

salt and pepper, to taste

ingredients for tortillas:

2 cups all-purpose flour

1/2 teaspoon salt

3/4 cup warm water

3 tablespoons vegetable oil

ingredients for serving:

sour cream

salsa

chopped fresh cilantro

lime wedges

(optional) pickled red onions 

instructions:

one. prepare the guacamole:

in a bowl, mash the avocados with a fork until mostly smooth.

stir in the chopped onion, diced tomato, minced garlic, minced jalapeño, and lime juice.

season the guacamole with salt and pepper to taste. cover with plastic wrap, pressing it directly against the surface of the guacamole to prevent browning, and set aside.

two. prepare the chimichanga filling:

in a large skillet, heat a tablespoon of vegetable oil over medium-high heat.

add the chopped onion and minced garlic and sauté for 2-3 minutes until they become fragrant and translucent.

add the ground beef and cook, breaking it apart with a spoon, until it's browned and cooked through. drain any excess fat if needed.

stir in the diced red and green bell peppers, minced jalapeño, chili powder, cumin, paprika, salt, and pepper. cook for another 2-3 minutes until the peppers start to soften.

add the black beans and corn kernels to the skillet, cooking for an additional 2-3 minutes to heat them through.

remove the skillet from heat and stir in the shredded cheddar cheese until it's melted and the filling is well combined.

three. make the tortillas (ones from supermarket work too ofc):

in a mixing bowl, combine the flour and salt.

add the warm water and vegetable oil to the dry ingredients and mix until a dough forms.

knead the dough on a floured surface for a few minutes until it becomes smooth.

divide the dough into 4 equal portions and roll them into balls.

flatten each ball into a thin circle using a rolling pin.

heat a skillet over medium-high heat and cook each tortilla for about 1-2 minutes on each side, or until they puff up and have golden spots. keep them warm in a clean kitchen towel.

four. assemble the chimichangas:

lay out the large flour tortillas on a clean surface.

spoon an equal amount of the chimichanga filling onto the center of each tortilla.

fold in the sides of the tortilla and then roll it up tightly, creating a burrito-like shape.

five. fry the chimichangas:

in a large, deep skillet, heat about 2 inches of vegetable oil over medium-high heat until it reaches around 170°c.

carefully place the chimichangas seam side down into the hot oil using tongs.

fry the chimichangas for about 2-3 minutes per side, or until they are golden brown and crispy.

use tongs to remove the chimichangas from the oil and place them on a paper towel-lined plate to drain any excess oil.

(for extra crispiness, you may double fry) 

six. serve:

serve the chimichangas hot, topped with a generous dollop of guacamole, sour cream, salsa, chopped cilantro, pickled red onions, and a lime wedge on the side.

seven. eating: 

gather your friends

get comfy 

get hydrated (i like to make hibiscus or tamarind agua fresca w it, or a good, green ice tea) 

and enjoy <3 

#wade wilson #chimichangas #recipes

[princessmisery666]

Fries, Goodbyes & The Rest Of Our Lives

Summary: Being stood up isn’t always a bad thing. 

Warnings/Genre etc.: Fluff, lousy singing. 

W/C: 2k

Characters: Bradley ‘Rooster’ Bradshaw, Mentions/Small Parts: Natasha ‘Phoenix’ Trace, Mickey ‘Fanboy’ Garcia, Robert ‘Bob’ Floyd, Jake ‘Hangman’ Seresin, Harvard. 

Pairing: Rooster x Fem!Reader (you - no descriptions of body type or ethnicity).

Notes: I saw this post on Instagram, and it immediately made me think of Rooster. Songs: Is This Love by White Snake, Can’t Take My Eyes Off You by Frankie Valli.

A/N: the wonderful and brilliant @writercole helped with ideas, summary, and title and helped make the muses comply. 

Betas: @deanwinchesterswitch

Master Lists: Top Gun: Maverick // All The Fandoms

Fries, Goodbyes & The Rest Of Our Lives

It’s been a week. It’s not even worth listing all the things that went wrong. The icing on the cake (presumably made with salt and not sugar - cause it's that kind of week) was your date canceled on you as you took a seat at a booth in the diner.

You sigh as the waitress comes to take your order, accepting that you’ve been stood up and decide you may as well eat since you’re already there.

“I’ll take a cheeseburger, side salad, no tomato, extra dressing, please.” 

The elderly waitress smiles. It’s comforting and sweet. Her name tag says Pattie, and you imagine her grandkids get overly excited whenever Granny Pat visits. “You want the fries with that?”

You ponder for half a second before declining, “No thanks.”

“You sure, hun? They’re included in the price.”

You had dirty Cajun fries from the food cart outside the office at lunch. You know the diner’s fries won’t taste as good, besides you want to leave room for dessert, so you politely decline again. 

“I’ll take them, Pattie!”

You twist in the booth to look over your shoulder and find the source. A handsome guy sitting at the bar, wearing a light yellow floral print shirt, smiles and gives a two-fingered wave. You’d clocked him when you’d entered. You’d caught his eye too, and he’d given you a broad smile. His mustache was a flashback to a decade or two ago, but he wore it well. He carried it with a sense of pride and confidence. It looked good on him. Anyone else, you’d have thought it was creepy.

“Hush now, boy,” Pattie scolds, but she’s smiling when she turns back to face you.

You chuckle, nodding toward him, “He’ll take the fries.”

Pattie takes your menu and disappears to the kitchen. You look at Mr. Mustache, who tips his beer bottle to you before bringing it to his lips.

You grab your phone and message the “No Scrubs” group. 

You: Stood up again. Where you guys at?

Cole: At that navy bar I was telling you about. Come meet us.

You: I’ve just ordered dinner. Will see how I feel after.

You scroll social media while you wait. Pattie comes by a few times, brings cutlery and sauces, and refreshes your drink. 

You hear the bell ring to signal an order’s ready, and your mouth waters when you see Pattie heading toward you. The burger looks delicious. The brioche bun glistens under the lights as the cheese melts over the edge onto the plate. It's so tall there’s a wooden skewer through the top to keep it in place, and the fries are fat and look perfectly crispy.  

Pattie sets the plate down, “Enjoy, sweetheart,” and you swallow before drool slips out.

Just as you pull the skewer out of the burger, you hear, “Those are mine, remember.”

You laugh, twisting to look at him again. He’s got a cheerful smirk, but his brow is raised as if challenging you. “Why don’t you join me?” you offer. 

He grabs his beer and twists off his stool. The smile remains while he saunters over, and you can’t take your eyes off him, admiring the sway of his hips. He’s confident in an almost bashful way. The open floral shirt shows a white shirt beneath it, and the contrast against his tanned skin looks as edible as your burger. 

“Tell me,” he says, grabbing a fry and biting off the end. “What kind of psychopath doesn’t have fries with their burger?”

You shrug, “The same kind that offers to take a stranger's fries.”

“Touché,” he chuckles. 

You laugh, explaining, “I had fries at lunch and want dessert.”

 He nods as if now understanding your logic. “Ah, she’s got a sweet tooth.” 

“I’ve heard that the chocolate malt here is the best in the state. I can’t pass that up,” you grin.

“Well, that is true,” he shrugs, popping another fry into his mouth. “Make or break question here, whipped cream on top of the shake?”

“I fear this will affect our budding friendship,” you tease, “but ab-so-lutely whipped cream on top of the shake. Among other places,” you wink. 

His boldness flounders for half a second, recognizing he’s met his match, but he recovers quickly. Wetting his lips and giving a cheeky smile. “Are you flirting with me?” 

“Depends.” 

“On what?”

“I don’t see a ring, and you’re here alone. Are you single?”

“Yes.”

“Then yes, I’m definitely flirting with you.”

His smile widens and remains while the conversation flows and the two of you eat. Flirtations and laughter pass back and forth effortlessly.

Your phone chimes with another message, and you see the ‘No Scrubs’ group chat has two unread messages. You don’t want to be rude and pick it up to reply, but you know if you don’t, they’ll likely call to make sure you’re okay. 

“Somewhere else you need to be?” he asks, a hint of disappointment in his voice that he attempts to hide behind a sip of beer.

“No, just some friends trying to get me to go meet them at some Navy bar.” You roll your eyes and type a quick ‘maybe’ before locking your phone, setting it face down on the table.

“Navy bar? The Hard Deck?” he questions, tilting his head to the side.

“I think that’s what Cole said. Do you know it?”

“That’s actually where I’m headed after. I could give you a ride. If you need one, that is.”

“I don’t even know your name.”

“It’s Bradley, but my friends call me Rooster.”

“Rooster?” you laugh. “Please tell me there’s a good story there.”

“There might be. I guess that depends on if you want to hear it.”

“How about you tell me on the way to the bar?”

The open window lifts your hair slightly, and every time Rooster gets a hit of your perfume, he inhales deeply, savoring it. 

He sticks to the speed limit, if not a little below it. He’s not quite ready to say goodbye to you. He’s never had such an instant, effortless connection with someone, and he wants to make it last as long as possible.

You’d laughed at the story about his name. You’d have never guessed that it was a nickname his uncle gave him when he was a kid. The radio is playing at a low volume, but as soon as the opening bars of Is This Love by White Snake start, you lean over and crank the volume as loud as it will go, singing along as if he isn’t there.

“Is this love that I'm feeling?” you sing, holding a pretend microphone. “Is this the love that I've been searching for? Is this love, or am I dreaming? This must be love. 'Cause, it's really got a hold on me. A hold on me.” 

You can’t hold a tune, and your voice cracks a few times, but still, you belt it out with vigor, and Rooster thinks he may be falling in love. Did Pattie put something in those fries? 

“Sorry,” you say, settling back into your seat, “that’s one of my favorites.” 

It’s one of my favorites now too. But he doesn’t say it. Instead, he laughs, “I never would’ve guessed.”

“Are you not a car karaoke kinda guy?” you ask. “You seem like you like to sing along.” 

“I’ve been known to hold a few car concerts,” he admits, “but I didn’t want to interrupt your flow.” 

“Can you sing as good as me?”

He looks at you and sees the jesting expression. You know you can’t sing, and you don’t care one little bit.

“I’d love to serenade you,” he says, “but unfortunately, we’re here.”

“Some other time?” you ask, and he swears you sound hopeful.

Rooster opens the Hard Deck door, and as soon as he hears the hustle and bustle from inside, he wishes he’d suggested you stay at the diner. Holding the door open, he gestures for you to enter first, and you smile a thanks as you pass by.

You stop a few feet inside, scanning the room as he stands beside you. This is the one time he hopes Hangman is being himself and has, by some miracle, coaxed your friends over to the group so Rooster has an excuse to keep talking to you. 

“Those are my friends over there,” you say, dashing all his hopes as you point to the pool tables on the opposite side of the room. 

“I’m over there,” Rooster says, pointing to where the Dagger squad is assembled. 

“Thanks for the ride.”

“Thanks for the fries.” 

“Anytime.” 

“Enjoy the rest of your night.” 

“You too.” 

There’s a pause, neither of you knowing what to do. You rise to the tips of your toes, and he dips to let you place a gentle kiss on his cheek. 

His cheeks quickly flush, hearing the jeers, shouts, and wolf whistles, but you drop back down with a laugh.

“Sorry,” he says. “They’re a bunch of idiots.”

He scolds himself for being an idiot as you walk away. He should invite you over or ask for your number, but he’s suddenly tongue-tied. He stares at you, frozen to the spot, long enough to see your friends turn to look at him as you settle into your seat.

Throughout the night, flirtatious glances are passed back and forth, and smiles exchanged when they linger. Of course, it’s Hangman who notices the consequence of Rooster’s error. 

“Looks like you lose again, Rooster,” the blond pilot remarks, a way too smug grin showing off his perfectly white teeth. “Too snug on that perch, and Harvard is gonna take your lady right out from under your beak.”

Rooster doesn’t care if it proves Hangman’s point. He looks directly at you. Harvard is whispering in your ear. You're smiling, but Rooster thinks it's more of a polite, courteous smile than genuine interest. 

But it’s the kick he needs to take action. He looks to Phoenix, Bob, and Mickey, almost pleading, “I need your help.” 

Phoenix nods once, Bob smiles, and Mickey asks, “What?”

“He wants to do the Goose move,” Phoenix explains without Bradley needing to tell her any more. 

“What’s the Goose move?”

“It’s the move his Dad did to get his Mom,” Bob says. 

“I don’t know what that is,” Mickey shrugs. 

“Technically, we've been doing it for years,” Rooster says, “it’s just that this time, it involves my future wife.”

“So, no pressure,” Bob gulps. 

“Relax. I’ve got a plan,” Phoenix winks, gesturing for the three guys to come closer.

Harvard doesn’t seem all that smart, and you wonder if it's an ironic nickname or callsign, as Rooster had explained. Harvard certainly doesn’t understand body language. You’ve tried, unsuccessfully, to put some distance between you three times. The third time he slides his arm around your shoulders. 

Before you can shrug, his arm slips off, and suddenly, a pretty brunette woman is in his place. “Hi,” she says brightly, her back to a flustered-looking Harvard. “I’m Phoenix, and this is Fanboy. We’re friends with Rooster.” 

Butterflies dance in your stomach. Before she can say anymore or you have a chance to wonder why he’s sent his friends to rescue you, the jukebox cuts off, and a collective groan echoes around the room. 

“That was supposed to happen,” Phoenix smiles. Fanboy is speaking quietly to Harvard, and he doesn’t seem happy about whatever is being said, but you're grateful for the interruption. 

There’s a soft twinkling from a piano somewhere in the room, and after a few more notes, you find the source. Phoenix continues, “That’s Bob, and you’ve met Rooster.” 

Your eyes drift up from the piano player and land on Bradley, fingers tapping the wooden top, while Bob continues to find the right melody.

Rooster’s eyes are locked on you, a shy smirk lifting the corner of his mustache. 

“Thanks for the save,” you say to Phoenix but keep your eyes on Rooster. 

“Well, it wasn’t the actual intention, but Harvard can be a bit…” she trails off.

“Thick?” 

“That’s a good word for him,” she laughs.

The bright random notes turn into a clear, rich melody that flows through the room moments before the smooth baritone of Rooster’s voice fills the air. “You’re just too good to be true. Can’t take my eyes off of you.”

Damn, he can sing! 

Taking the lyrics literally, he doesn’t avert his eyes while he serenades you. You feel Phoenix’s hand at your elbow, but you can’t look away from the gorgeous man belting out a song just for you. Only when he draws closer do you realize she’s guiding you to him. 

The bar is packed, and the crowd gathers around the piano, but somehow Rooster is always in your line of sight, and then Fanboy is in front of you, splitting the crowd to let you through. 

It feels surreal but magical when somehow there’s a clear path straight to Rooster. It looks like an aisle leading to an altar, and the man that awaits you has been sent from the heavens because he’s gorgeous, kind, funny, and clearly has a talent for commanding a room. You wonder what else you could uncover, given some time.

“At long last, love has arrived,” Rooster sings as you reach his side. Phoenix slips away as you reach for Bradley’s outstretched hand. 

Definitely an altar, and you’ll happily worship here for eternity. Interlocking your fingers with his, he pulls you against him. “Now that I found you, stay,” it’s more than a song, it's a question, and you nod. 

Slowly, he inches closer, and the crowd takes over, singing the chorus, when his lips connect with yours and the world melts away. 

Tag List Info

Take To The Skies: @alexxavicry / @b3autyfuldisast3r / @fandom-princess-forevermore / @imjess-themess / @justagirlinafandomworld / @leigh70 / @letsbys-library / @shanimallina87 / @wildbornsiren / @writercole / @xoxabs88xox / @atarmychick007

Master Lists: Top Gun: Maverick // All The Fandoms

#top gun maverick #bradley rooster bradshaw #bradley bradshaw #rooster #top gun maverick fanfic #top gun maverick fan fiction #rooster fan fic #reader insert #rooster singing #rooster fluff #bradley bradshaw fluff #meet cute #rooster x reader #rooster x you #rooster x female reader #rooster x f!reader #rooster x fem!reader

[scoobhead]

PLEASE tell me some of your favorite sandwiches...i work at a diner and i get one free sandwich per day and i almost always get the exact same thing. gimme something that will deeply bamboozle the kitchen staff

thank you for this ask. i am so sorry for the sandwich tangent that it inspired. this post is in fact so long that i have to put it under a read more tag so it doesn't reach Do You Love The Color Of The Sky notoriety. also this has been written as, like, a general cooking guide instead of Things You Can Order At A Diner, but otherwise feel free to show this post to your kitchen staff and watch their minds crumble

to build a great sandwich - a truly Fucked Up Sandwich - you must first understand that a sandwich is, at its core, just some bread with stuff on it. as a disclaimer, i don't mean to diss the classics. they're around for a reason. i just know that PERSONALLY i am a little bit sick of the same second grade lunchbox sandwich, and PERSONALLY i prefer to push the boundaries of simple food preparation into the realm of the eldritch and unknown.

the sandwiches i make are different every time. you may have heard the old adage "cooking is an art." that is partially true, sometimes, kind of. cooking, for me, is more like a four year old getting access to paint for the first time and losing their whole goddamn mind about it. i want you to let go of every rule you think there is. make things up. go crazy.

the bread of the sandwich matters only insofar as it can support its fillings. i tend to use plain ol whole wheat, but honestly, you can use whatever you'd like. my big piece of advice here is to think about the structural integrity of your design. much like a bread engineer, because that's what you are. if your fillings are wet or gelatinous (hold on, we're getting there) you NEED a crustier bread. sara lee won't cut it. some people like fancy bread with herbs and shit. i see the bread more as a canvas than as part of the painting, but like, there are no rules. go ham.

speaking of ham. this is the section where you expect me to disavow lunch meats. i shan't. pre-sliced meat is a brilliant (and cheap!) way to provide the basis of flavor for your sandwich AND to make sure you get enough protein. if you're vegan or vegetarian, you'll have to skip this step, but that's okay because it's not an integral part of the process. that being said, i think it lays a solid foundation for the whole sandwich's raison d'etre.

pairing with a good cheese is a classic for a reason. i stay away from american - it melts beautifully, which makes it great for grilled cheese, but it also has an artificial quality to it that i don't really vibe with. swiss, provolone, and cheddar are staples, but honest to god, any cheese can be made to work if you build around it. (side note: the best grilled cheese uses american, pepper jack, colby, and a tomato. season the OUTSIDE of the bread with butter, red pepper flakes, garlic, and a dash of oregano. fry up an egg and put it on top and oh baby. ham optional if you want some extra protein.)

ok. you have your basics. now i need you to take a look around your kitchen and GO WILD.

one of my Go To Combinations is turkey, swiss, and a fruit jam (i like apricot). it is EXTREMELY good and easy to make, and the jam gives it just the right touch of sweetness to complement to mellow flavor of the turkey. if you're like, "oh, wow, you put JAM? on a SANDWICH??? ARE YOU OK????" you need to stop reading right now. the shaggy-like combinations that i concoct may be too strong for you, traveler.

if you like sweet foods and want to lean into that, keep exploring Fruit Road. jams and preserves work wonders. fruit butters are also nice for a more savory touch, but can get expensive and/or seasonal. you can also go for Fruits themselves: thinly sliced apple + ham + brie (or swiss, if you can't swing a more expensive cheese) is a godsend. most fruits belong on a sandwich tbh. grapes, tangerines, bananas, pineapple: it's all about the right context.

if you want to go Even Further Beyond, Fruit Road takes you right down to Sweets Avenue. honey works on most sandwiches, and - hear me out - will cut the tangy, eggy flavor of mayonnaise. it's easy for honey to overpower, though, so i'd say to go for a little before tasting and reassessing. plain or vanilla yogurt also complements fruit really well without being overpowering. if you REALLY want to go sweet, i like marshmallow fluff + bananas + peanut butter for protein. i've yet to find good vegan alternates to these, unfortunately - agave nectar would work in place of honey, but play around and see what you can come up with.

if you want to go savory, then Aromatics Boulevard will make sure you get substance and flavor. basil is an underrated addition to sandwiches, as are green onions, garlic (jarlic works great for this, don't @ me), and cabinet spices. you might need to try a little to get the proportions right, but chicken + mozzarella + plain yogurt + curry powder is frankly a godsend. i also lovelovelove a good sauce; nando's perinaise is usually region-specific, but it's creamy and tangy and goes with everything and i'm obsessed with it. get creative with what you have!

ok. this is my secret ingredient. come here. lao gan ma is chili oil, but with chili crisps in it. it is the single best ingredient in my kitchen. it's not expensive, a jar of it lasts forever, and you can find it at almost every asian grocery store. it is the perfect kick of spice to add to a sandwich. plenty of heat but not overpowering, and with a mostly savory finish. god it's so good. i scoop it with a knife to avoid most of the oil and spread just the crisp over the sandwich. crunchy, spicy, savory. mamma mia.

those are the BASICS of what i can give you. if you've read this far and you actually make a Fucked Up Sandwich PLEASE tag me in it, because odds are i'll try it. be bold. make a potato salad + tangerine + tahini monstrosity. (i haven't tried that but maybe it's good???) anything is a sandwich if you're brave enough. if you're still looking for inspiration, i get a lot of ideas from traditional tea sandwiches, which are usually ~3 ingredients and can get absolutely hogwild.

if you want more specific recipes or combinations then reach out and i can send you a list, but i hope that this gave you the tools and confidence to go forth and wreak havoc. have fun stay safe eat sandwiches!

#anon i hope this was what you wanted #sorry this is a sandwich blog now i think #ask #anon #nat og #sandwich posting

[shoku-and-awe]

My first sourdough in about a year—jalapeño cheddar pepperoni bread! The flavor was sooooo good, and the crust texture was absolutely addictive. Great with soup and with good Irish butter. The crumb could use a little work but still, yum. Recipe here, extra notes under the cut.

I used about 80g shredded cheese, 2 large pickled jalapeños (votes were split on whether it could use 3), and all the pepperoni we had, so this kinda proportion:

This dough can be very wet and sticky so I dusted it with quite a lot of flour. I used to just mix the fillings into the dough after autolyzing, but this time, I was successful in flattening the dough, sprinkling the fillings on top, and then gently wrapping it into a ball for the stretch and folds.

I did 6 stretch & folds, then ended up letting it rest 5 hours instead of the prescribed 3 (had too much fun at a New Year’s party) before shaping, so it may have overproofed, but then again, New England winter! Things take time.

I preheated the oven to 500F/260C with the Dutch oven inside, letting it heat maybe 20-30 minutes. I then added the dough and baked it covered for 20 minutes, then lowered the temp to 450F/230C, uncovered it, and baked another 10-15.

What else. Gosh, I think this would make a great breakfast, or a side for tomato soup. My brother would like me to add polenta, like with this bread. The pepperoni added a ton of flavor, especially considering how little I put in. Definitely worth working on this recipe!

#make again #sourdough #cheese #jalapeño #pepperoni

[stormyoceans]

Ok then top 5 pasta SAUCES!!

SFJKSHFKGSKDGSJ ALRIGHT!!!!!!!!!

1. carbonara. love and light to all but carbonara is made with only 5 essential ingredients: guanciale, pecorino, egg yolks, black pepper, and spaghetti. you take out or change any one of these, then it’s no longer carbonara. i have no doubt it tastes great anyway, it’s just not carbonara. and carbonara is SACRED.

2. pesto alla genovese. fresh pesto made with a mortar and pestle is quite possibly the closest thing to heaven i can imagine. it's absolutely perfect as a pasta sauce (you HAVE TO use trofie as a pasta shape), but my guilty pleasure is to simply eat it by itself on a bruschetta. it’s just THAT good.

3. sugo al pomodoro. tomato sauce may sounds too simple considering all the different kind of ingredients you can pair with pasta, but sometimes nothing is quite as good and comforting as simplicity. this one is also the most versatile sauce of all because it goes well with pretty much any pasta shape.

4. aglio, olio e peperoncino. even simpler than tomato sauce, you literally need only 3 simple ingredients to make this, as the name suggests: garlic, extra virgin olive oil, and red pepper. pair it up with spaghetti, pour yourself a glass of white wine to go along with it, and you basically have my go to comfort dinner.

5. pasta alla norma. possibly named after the title character of an opera by vincenzo bellini, this pasta pairs tomato sauce with fried eggplant and salted ricotta cheese for an explosion of flavours that could make everyone swoon, even people who usually don’t like eggplants. TRUST ME.

#this would probably anger so many italians since i left out ragú and amatriciana BUT I STAND WITH WHAT I SAID #thank you so much for asking this karen!!!!!!! #hope you're having a wonderful day!!!!!! 💜 #my top 5 #m: ask #cw food

[dynamic-k]

if you get this, answer with three random facts about yourself and send it to the last seven blogs in your notifs! anon or not, doesn’t matter, let’s get to know the person behind the blog <3

1.) I can swim, but I can only doggie paddle. This fact is so only because on either my 1st or 2nd [hehe Second] camping trip, I was taught some of the ropes by a friend.

By camping trip, I mean the one where my church sets up a summer camp, I sign up, and then go off without my parents for 3 days, 5 days, or a week, depending on circumstances.

My very first camping expedition was for 3 days. My second [heh] was for a week. I think in total I have gone on camping trips.... I want to say eight times? Nine?

2.) I have coffee in my blood.

I cannot express how much I love coffee. And yet, somehow it's not an addiction. I don't have to have one every single day, and honestly sometimes I get too busy with my day to even remember coffee exists. XD

But man. I LOVE COFFEE.

About 290mL of steamed and foamed milk plus two shots of espresso.

Delicious.

3.) I work at a Dominos pizza place and am REALLY good at slapping the dough out. That is the term "slapping", meaning that I stretch the dough ball out evenly to place on the sheets. I have been working there for close to three years now.

I love pizza.... as long as it doesn't have bell peppers, mushrooms, or olives on it. Sausage... depends on the quality. My mom buys good sausage and I'm a little spoiled, lol.

Also, you can't buy a cinnamon roll at Dominos, but I can make a bunch using a medium dough ball and our cinnamix. The joys of custom-making stuff as an employee. XD

My favorite pizza is a pan pizza, topped with a mixture of garlic parmesan sauce and hearty marina sauce, cheddar cheese, minced fresh garlic, spinach, more cheddar cheese, EXTRA bacon, tomatoes, EXTRA pineapple, more cheddar cheese, EXTRA EXTRA onion slices [stick, I love raw onion so much], more cheddar cheese [sometimes at this point pepperoni and/or chicken also depending on mood and how mountain high the pizza is at this point], oregano and garlic herb seasoning, and then usually a liiiight drizzle of buffalo sauce, a little more cheddar and then into the oven it goes.

A Scarlett Special. Trust me, it is delicious. It may sound very weird to some, but I make good food. I have many positive reviews to back me up. :>

I wish I could make some now and pass you a slice through the screen.

Um. I got carried away there, oof.

....

Anyway!! Those are the facts I decided to go with! XD

#Ask Scarlett #I am likely the weirdest individual in all existence #don't mind me #✨~Second Punnery~✨

[sniffanimal]

Hey boss do you have an actual recipe for that gyro bowl? Or do you just cook by vibes? Literally have been thinking about that thang for a whole day, lol

So, I've cooked *similar* things from recipe but I was going off pure vibes alone, BUT I can type up what I did in a sort of recipe-esque format for you! This may not be 1:1 exactly what I cooked, but it might be close?

Recipe for Donnie's Gyro Bowl below:

Ingredience (amount of each fed 3 people in excess, so maybe 4 servings?):

1lb Ground Lamb (can be omitted for a vegetarian friendly recipe, or changed for Protein Of Choice)

2 roma tomatoes

1 cucumber

1 zucchini

2 cans of chickpeas

1 large white onion

Dill weed (I ended up having to get dry, but fresh is better!)

Pearl Couscous (1 box, was roughly 2 cups of dry couscous)

greek yogurt (1 little cup of it)

1 lemon, or a decent amount of lemon juice

white wine vinegar

feta

"tuscan seasoning blend" which seems to be mostly basil, oregano, rosemary, thyme, garlic, and fennel.

"taco seasoning" which I used mostly for its cayenne, i would have liked to use paprika and cayenne together instead of relying on taco mix

Garlic powder (again, would have liked at least minced garlic if not fresh)

onion powder

red pepper flakes

Olive oil, butter, salt, and pepper

preheat oven to 400f. Dice tomato and zucchini (keeping them separate), and halve then slice thinly the onion. Zest and halve the lemon then juice into a bowl/cup. Dice half the cucumber, then grate the other half on the medium/large size holes on a box grater (or really finely chop it into mush).

Put the diced cucumber and half the tomatoes in a bowl and add half a cup of white wine vinegar and some warm water. Add a few tsp of lemon juice, salt, pepper, and Dill. Allow to quick pickle while everything else cooks.

drain chickpeas well and mix in a bowl with olive oil and what feels like the right amount of tuscan seasoning and taco mix powder. the peas should look well coated but not like Caked with Seasoning. Toss to mix and then spread out in a single layer on a greased cookie sheet. Bake for ~25 minutes depending on your oven. They might make popping sounds while cooking, be not afraid.

Melt a little butter in a pot and then add the couscous to toast it a bit before adding the same amount in water and then a little extra, maybe 1/4 cup extra. Stir in a generous amount of garlic and onion powders and boil for uhhh a bit until all the water has been absorbed. If couscous is undercooked and all the water is absorbed then add some more and cook until done. Keep warm until ready to serve.

In another pan, melt a bit more butter then add the lamb, stirring to break it up and brown it. I added a lot of the seasonings in different amounts, and some chili pepper flakes. Once cooked through, add half the tomato to cook with it. Once the tomato is soft and the lamb is fully cooked, remove from the pan and keep warm.

To the ~juices~ from the cooked lamb in the pan, add the zucchini and onion and cook well until the zucchini is soft and charred and the onions are soft. Season with Salt, Pepper, and Dill. Add more butter or oil if you didn't have any animal fats left over from meat.

To the greek yogurt, add the shredded cucumber, some lemon juice, dill, salt, and pepper. Stir to combine and taste to see if it's balanced.

To serve, put a layer of couscous at the bottom of the bowl, followed by chickpeas, the meat mix, the cooked veggies, the cucumber tomato salad, and then tzatziki sauce. Top with crumbled feta cheese.

The dish has such a mix of great flavors and textures and temperatures and heat and cream and lemon sour and its all just really really delicious. It did take maybe 40 minutes for me to cook but was soooooo worth it new favorite thing to cook for people.

Also if you were wondering, I went to the grocery store to buy everything I needed to make it more or less and it was about $35 and fed 3-4. The real expensive parts were the dill and the lamb, so those comprised $20 of it. If you already have dill, and omit or change the meat, it's a lot cheaper. Also its 2024 and groceries are expensive as hell.

#recipes #recipe #food pics #asks #florasongs #badger rants

[contac]

#CHEESE AND TOMATO MAY BE EXTRA #DON'T BE FOOLED #vhs #wendy's #1986 #fast food #kids meal

[apolloendymion]

listen to me. i am talking directly in your ear now.

save your kitchen scraps. I'm talking carrot tops, peels, and greens. the tops & skins of onion and garlic. celery leaves. squash rinds. citrus peels. apple cores. tomatoes and lettuce that are just a little too wilted/mushy to be palatable. eggshells. cheese rinds. chicken skin. potato skins if you washed the dirt off. the water/oil from canned foods. BONES!! skins, peels, stems, leaves, anything that isn't poisonous but you wouldn't normally eat. we're going to make some fucking Broth.

(note: cruciferous veggies like brussels sprouts are ok in small quantities, but keep in mind that they're bitter and may bitter-ize your broth in larger amounts.)

put those scraps in a bag in the freezer. I'd recommend storing the liquids in a separate bag from the solids. add scraps whenever you've got em, until you've accrued about half a gallon ziplock of solids. now, you're Ready.

put a little oil at the bottom of a soup pot. just enough to sauté your solids. add some minced garlic and herbs/spices, if you have them (dried is fine, but i don't recommend powdered spices unless they're all you've got.) i like warming spices like star anise and cardamom pods; they make it taste like pho, sooo cozy. and of course, bay leaves!! if you have them, put at least 3 in there. minimum. trust me.

(if you don't have/want animal parts, add a little more oil than necessary for sauteing. you're gonna want the extra, believe me. I'd also sauté for longer, and pick an oil with a little flavor if you can, like olive. canola/vegetable is perfectly fine though.)

add the solids and sauté. i usually just thaw them in the oil, but if you're better at planning than me, you can put them in the fridge the night before. ideally you should sauté until the veggies start to brown. I'm not always that patient. it's fine. just make sure everything fully thaws and separates from one another. get a thin coat of oil over everything.

next, add the liquid ingredients and fill the rest of the pot with water (taking care to leave some space in case it boils over.) bring the pot to a boil, then turn it as low as your stove allows and leave it to simmer for as long as possible. this is KEY. let that shit MARINATE. let it STEW, no pun intended. i usually try to start this project in the morning, so i can leave it for the rest of the day. i have left it on overnight before but i can't recommend that in good conscience. do not burn your house down for broth. 2 hours would probably be my absolute minimum. stay close by, and stir it every so often so it doesn't boil over. chill on the couch. watch tv. enjoy the smell that permeates your house and makes it feel like a home. it's cozy time.

add salt, tasting as you go. you don't want to overdo it. some folks say to add the salt at the sauteing stage, but i feel this gives me too little control over the final product. i need control. I've got anxiety. but you do you. live your life. I'm not your boss.

once it tastes how you want it, strain out the solids. if I'm going to make soup right away, then I'll strain the liquid directly into another pot, throw in the soup ingredients, and simmer till everything's soft. otherwise, put it in a container you can freeze for later.

rejoice. broth be upon ye.

sip it when you're sick, make it into soup, use it in a casserole, cook rice with it. give a jar to your neighbors. you are the broth god. you are unstoppable. you will never waste a vegetable piece ever again.

go forth and Experience The Broth.

#idk what to tag this as #recipes #??

[writingquestionsanswered]

Ok this might be trigger since it involves overeating but I noticed my creativity only is there when I eat hence I overeat, any advice on this? To not have to eat when I’m not hungry to be creative?

Creativity Linked to Eating

Here are a few things you can try...

1 - Write during mealtime. If you feel like you're creativity is only there while you're eating, try scheduling your daily writing session to coincide with a meal. That way, you're not eating anything extra. You're just writing when you're eating a meal anyway.

2 - Write with a healthy snack. See if there are any healthy snacks you can munch on while you write. Apple wedges, mixed nuts, celery sticks with cream cheese or peanut butter, kale chips, cucumber slices with hummus, cherry tomatoes with mozzarella and balsamic vinegar, baby carrots, popcorn (without butter and without a lot of salt), a smoothie, edamame, roasted chickpeas, roasted broccoli, dry Cheerios, etc.

3 - Take a walk instead. Exercise is a huge creativity trigger for most people, so try taking a walk around the block before you sit down to write. Even a few minutes worth of jumping jacks and running in place can help. Sit down afterward with a glass of water, and you may find you no longer feel the need to eat to fire up your creativity.

4 - Try a tasty beverage. There's a reason so many of us drink coffee, tea, or other beverages while we write. If you feel like eating and your creativity are tied together, try drinking something instead. My go-to is coffee, but hot or cold tea, sparkling water, water with lemon, sports drinks, and smoothies are other good options.

5 - Try other creativity boosting exercises. The following posts have some suggestions:

Guide: Filling Your Creative Well Guide: How to Rekindle Your Motivation to Write Getting Excited About Your Story Again Getting Unstuck: Motivation Beyond Mood Boards & Playlists

Happy writing!

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

I’ve been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I’ve learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!

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#tw eating problems #tw eating #tw eating disorder #wqaadvice

[tradgays]

30 Ways Gay Couples Can Embrace a 1950s Vintage Lifestyle

1. Establish traditional gender roles. Even in same-sex relationships, couples can assign different roles to each partner, such as one partner being “the man” and the other “the wife.”

2. Utilize classic cleaning techniques from the 1950s. Polishing furniture, ironing linens and clothes washing using a hand-cranking device can be a fun project.

3. Embrace the style. A 1950s-inspired wardrobe of sweater vests, bow ties, slacks, saddle shoes and loafers can create a classic look with a modern twist. Or go the rockabilly route with denim and leather.

4. Upgrade the kitchen with mid-century wares. Invest in classic kitchenware such as Pyrex casserole dishes and Tupperware sets.

5. Learn some swing or jitterbug moves. Register for local dance classes or hold dance parties in the living room.

6. Send letters or postcards to each other. Handwrite some words of love to your partner and include a pressed flower or favorite recipe as an extra touch.

7. Relax in silk kimonos or satin robes. Vintage robes will make your partner smile when they tie it around their waist every morning.

8. Utilize mid-century magazines for decoration. Hang up Life magazines with classic covers or revel in the styles and fashions of early fashion magazines.

9. Adopt classic lifestyle habits such as a morning cup of homemade coffee, afternoon tea and a proper bedtime routine.

10. Bring back the classics. Everything from detective books to classic romance novels will make for great bedtime stories and conversation starters. Throw in some gay pulp fiction for spice.

11. Buy vintage kitchenware. Collecting mid-century cutlery and silverware will make your kitchen feel homey and inviting.

12. Spend a day gardening. Plant roses, tomatoes or other flowering plants as a fun couple’s activity and add a touch of beauty to the front yard.

13. Have picnics with cheese and fresh prepared foods from the market. Pack a box of classic treats such as apples, nuts and pickles in a wicker basket.

14. Care for your pet as if it were a child. Spend quality time together playing with your beloved pet or simply brushing their fur or petting them.

15. Play vintage board games. Connect with each other by buying classic board games such as Monopoly or Risk.

16. Cook dinner together. Whip up some classic dishes such as steak and mashed potatoes or pork chops and corn on the cob.

17. Spruce up your living room with mid-century furniture. Invest in more modern, retro-style furniture to give your living room a touch of charm.

18. Make fun activities from the 1950s such as baking, cleaning and home improvement projects. Have fun as a couple as you both reminisce about the past and create new memories.

19. Listen to classic music on vinyl records. Play nostalgic tunes from classic artists such as Elvis Presley or Frank Sinatra.

20. Collect antiques from the 1950s. Invest in classic wares such as tea sets or vintage lamps and use them as conversation starters or simply as decorative pieces.

21. Dress up for special occasions. Pull out all the stops and dress to the nines when attending special occasions such as anniversaries or holidays.

22. Have fun in the sun. Go for a vintage-style picnic near a lake or riverside to take advantage of the beautiful summer weather.

23. Get reading. Get your hands on the classics such as Walt Whitman’s “Leaves of Grass,” Louisa May Alcott’s “Little Women,” and Margaret Mitchell’s “Gone With the Wind.”

24. Walk together in nature. Put on some sturdy shoes or cowboy boots and take a stroll together in a nearby wooded area.

25. Buy old movies from the 1950s. Pop some popcorn and cuddle up on the couch as you watch the great films of the era.

26. Join a local vintage car club. Spend some time together admiring classic cars and seeing how the vintage lifestyle is still alive.

27. Learn to play instruments of the era. Take a banjo or ukulele lesson and you’ll have plenty of fun making music together.

28. Get lost is a classic bookstore. Lose yourself in the past as you browse through old books and share stories with each other.

29. Plant your own herbs and vegetables. Eat healthily and reduce your food bill by planting your own gardens with the help of your partner.

30. Spend some time outdoors. Go for a leisurely stroll together in a nearby

#tradgays #tradgay #1950s #vintage

[wonderlandleighleigh]

Steve Rogers talks with you about toast

When I was eleven years old, my Ma came home with a pop-up toaster. 

It was 1929, and things were not going well for the American people. It was November, and the weather was getting cold. Food was getting a little hard to come by. Thankfully, Ma had a little job security, being a hospital nurse and all, but it wasn’t a sure thing. She knew she could be cut loose at any moment. 

But that night, plugging in our little metal toaster for the first time, she said “things may look bleak, Stevie. But at least we’ll have good toast.” 

When I got out of the ice, one of the biggest things that caused me anxiety was the idea that I wouldn’t like any of the new food available in the twenty-first century; that things would have changed so much that there would be nothing recognizable about what ended up on my dinner plate.

On my first day, Nick Fury took me out to breakfast. We didn’t talk much about what he wanted from me. We didn’t talk about what had happened to me. 

We talked about the menu. 

And on that menu? 

Rye toast.

I smiled so hard when I saw it that my face hurt.

Here’s something you might not know: Sarah Rogers and Winifred Barnes were very close friends. Neighbors, yes, and their sons were inseparable, but as two single mothers trying to make ends meet, they did all they could to support each other and keep each other safe. Mrs. Barnes didn’t speak much English, and she couldn’t read or write it, so when things came up that required explanation, my Ma was always there for her. 

And in return, Mrs. Barnes would make extra food for us. Ma worked, and she wasn’t really much of a cook, to be honest, god rest her soul.

But Winifred Barnes was amazing. And she was very good at lucking into food. A crate of potatoes once fell off of a truck right at her feet, and that tiny Jewish woman dragged it eight blocks home, and nobody stopped her. Neighbors and friends would hand her cuts of meat they didn’t know how to cook, and we’d all feast like kings. She kept ten bags of flour in her home at all times, even during the worst years of the depression. 

“Du hast mel, du hast broyt.” 

Yiddish for: “you have flour, you have bread.” 

Which brings me back to toast. 

In those days, butter, jam…hard to come by. We’d put gravy on the toast. Creamed corn. Ma read about tomato gravy: tomatoes, salt, flour. They used to put that on biscuits in the south.  

Every so often, Mrs. Barnes would luck her way into a box of fruit, and she’d make jam out of what she got. It was a treat back then! Sweet and sticky and satisfying. 

Now, today, it feels like there are endless things to put on toast. The most popular being egg, cheese and meat. 

Picture this: It’s three in the morning, you’ve just gotten your face punched in by a guy who should be dead, but keeps coming back, really for the specific purpose of punching you in the face. You turn a corner, and there is a lone shop with a light on. A corner bodega. You step in, and the clerk behind the counter’s first instinct is to reach for the emergency button under the counter, but then he recognizes your bruised face, and the shield you’re sliding into the holder on your back.

And he smiles. 

You limp up to the counter and you give a polite hello, even though one of your eyes is swelling shut a little, and request a sausage, egg and cheddar on an onion bagel.

Believe me, you’re not kissin’ anybody tonight, enjoy the onion.

And he hurries to make it for your, and you grab two waters out of the cold case: one for drinking and one for your face, and you pay (he offers it for free, but you insist, so he discounts it heavily), and soon, you’re eating your hot, gooey toasted bagel sandwich, leaning on the counter, chatting with the clerk about life, and how you wish New York had the climate to grow lemon trees, because lemons are so useful.

You may ask, “But Steve, that’s a bagel sandwich, that’s not really toast.” You toast the bagel, don’t you? Toast in my book.

You go home. You get a little sleep. You take a hot shower, and thank god that eye is healing up pretty well now, and then…

You pop some rye bread in your toaster, and once it’s popped, you scrape just a little butter on it, and then slather sweet, rich strawberry jam right on top. 

It’s quiet. There’s coffee. The toast has a good crunch, and the rye is thick enough to stand up to all that spread. 

And it’s a little piece of heaven right in your kitchen.

I keep hearing about avocado toast. People get really nuts about it, and I have to admit, I don’t get the hype, nor do I get the naysayers. This idea that an entire generation is too busy eating a fruit on a piece of toasted bread to get a job seems like something somebody who dislikes unions and paying fair wages would say. 

That’s an essay for another time.

For my money, if I’m going to be fancy about my toast, it’s going to involve fish and cream cheese. There were quite a few appetizing stores (shops that sell smoked and pickled fish instead of deli meat) in Brooklyn when I was a teen, and when we had a little money to burn, Bucky and I would hit one and I would get pickled herring: sour and fishy and filling as it was. 

And I know that’s not trendy now. It’s not what most people eat. But you might be surprised at how good it is if you give it a shot.

These days, when the mood strikes, I sneak into Russ and Daughters on Houston Street. I order my pickled herring and cream cheese on a toasted onion bagel (whoever I’m kissing is just going to have to suffer), a piece of cinnamon babka and a coffee. 

When Bucky is in town, he goes all out: lox and sable with dill horseradish cream cheese on a toasted everything bagel. He, too, does not care what the person he’s kissing thinks of his breath.

The bagels are always toasted perfectly. Browned and crisp, melting the cream cheese a little so the consistency is gooey and a good contrast to the cold, salty fish. 

I’ve decided, now that I have a little more free time, that I’m going to start making my own bread at home. See if I can get good at it. I do okay in the kitchen (Buck is way better than I am, having learned under his mother’s feet), and I’m hoping to get better. 

At the very least, I’ll have some toast

#fic #au #steve rogers #steve rogers talks with you

[danglovely]

Regrading Taskmaster: S02 E02 Pork is a sausage.

*Score changes noted in parenthesis.

Prize Task: Trendiest Item of clothing.

Richard brings in a t-shirt of the Osmonds but with his face edited over them. It's a clever joke, but a complete whiff on trendiness as the Mormon sing group gradually becomes less and less relevant over time.

Katherine brings in a pair of leggings with a unicorn fighting a robot dinosaur with a rainbow overhead. This actually isn't bad; the 80's aesthetic is pretty bullet proof and it exudes a level of non-sequitarian humor that can be pretty trendy.

Jon brings in a cardigan with a a black waist coat sewn in. He impresses Katherine with it, but outside of cardigans being a decently popular item of clothing, this isn't particularly impressive.

Joe brings in his best tie with his aunt (definitely a lie) and a small vintage car embroidered on it. It doesn't look terrible but he really needed to sell this with a better story.

Doc brings in bright red waterproof converse, or what he calls "wellies with laces." He tries to sell it by saying how ridiculous they are and that's what he finds trendy.

They all sort of whiff on the category to varying degrees. Richard's is the opposite of trendy and Katherine's is the best. The other three are largely dependent on taste.

Doc: 4 (-1) Joe: 2 (0) Jon: 3 (0) Katherine: 5 (+1) Richard: 1 (0)

VT 01: Eat me. Fastest wins.

Theoretically objective task but there is a ton of pedantry involved in how much of an egg one has to consume to "eat it." None of them eat the shell, but it's pretty collectively understood that it isn't included when you say you've consumed an egg.

Doc and Joe appear to completely consume their eggs. Katherine abstains after tasting raw egg and takes a DQ as a result The issue is that Jon and Richard both lose some of their egg to the table because they crack it into the egg-cup and it isn't big enough to hold the contents.

It's not an easy question because interpreting the task to mean consume any of the egg puts Katherine back in the game, but interpreting it to mean the entire egg DQ's Jon and Richard. Greg seems to take an intent-based approach (Jon and Richard didn't mean to lose part of their eggs and consumed as much as they possibly could) and the outcome feels just.

Doc: 4 (0) Joe: 2 (0) Jon: 3 (0) Katherine: DQ (0) Richard: 5 (0)

VT 02: Make the best music video for a nursery rhyme.

Doc's music video for Once I Caught a Fish Alive is so good that I occasionally go back and rewatch it, just because it jams. Jon's horror movie version of Three Blind Mice is a close second.

I'm not sure Katherine actually completed the task because one of the requirements of being a nursery rhyme is that it's traditional and she wrote an original song.

Richard's rendition of She'll Be Coming Round the Mountain while he's generally being mean to people is interesting, if a little confusing thematically. However, I'm actually going to give the nod to Joe, who I think achieved a level of terribleness that brought it back around to good again.

Doc: 5 (0) Joe: 3 (+2) Jon: 4 (-1) Katherine: DQ (-4) Richard: 2 (-1)

Studio Task: Using this camera, take a picture of an inanimate object that looks like you. Closest resemblance wins.

Most of them got pretty close and Richard did deserve top marks here because his is the only object that, if I saw it out in the wild, I would say "that looks like Richard Osman." Doc Brown looks a little more like Marvin Humes than Katherine does the woman on the Spanx box and somehow they both look more like their objects than Jon's 3D print of himself. Joe got two points for bringing in a toaster then dressing up like a toaster. Good bit, but unless he always dresses up like a toaster there's no resemblance.

Doc: 4 (+3) Joe: 1 (-1) Jon: 2 (-2) Katherine: 3 (0) Richard: 5 (0)

VT 03: Order the following pizza for the Taskmaster: Extra large vegetarian pizza with pepperoni and bacon, and without tomato and cheese. You may not use the following words: Extra, Large, Vegetarian, Pizza, Pepperoni, Bacon, Tomato, Cheese.

The task doesn't lay out the winning condition and all of them say one of the forbidden words at least once. They decide in studio that the best pizza delivered wins it. It isn't the fairest way to grade because they all were calling different pizza places and the task specifies that you just have to order the pizza, not receive it. As such, I'll rescore based on violations + the "bubbles" bonus point.

Doc: 2 (-1) Joe: 5 (0) Jon: 2 (-3) Katherine: 5 (+1) Richard: 5 (+4)

Live Task: Using these big chopsticks, get these potatoes into your basket. You must only hold the big chopsticks on the grips provided. The big chopsticks alone may touch the potatoes in turn. Whoever has the most potatoes in the basket after 100 seconds wins.

Richard breaks the rules right off the bat. Jon gets 11/10 potatoes which is great, and within the rules, because "these" could mean any of the potatoes on stage. Doc and Joe take zeroes because their baskets fall off the stage, but they should actually come in joint third unless the task required all 10 potatoes to go in the basket (which would DQ Katherine).

Doc: 3 (+3) Joe: 3 (+3) Jon: 5 (0) Katherine: 4 (0) Richard: DQ (0)

Final

Doc: 22 (+4) Joe: 16 (+3) Jon: 19 (-6) Katherine: 17 (-2) Richard: 18 (+3)

So it seems like Jon was heavily overscored in this episode mostly because the pizza task didn't penalize mistakes. Doc probably should have won the episode where he dropped the amazing nursery rap.

#taskmaster #doc brown #joe wilkinson #jon richardson #katherine ryan #richard osman #tm regrade