#Although it’s only with a few characters that really make me feel that the art style in general just gives bad memories

[laniemae]

I am going to take a break from milgramblr

[important please read]

ok now how do I start. Im going to take a break from tumblr for about a week. Things have been absolutely awful for me here since the very beginning of 2024, even if it may not look that way at times.

to retell the situation it happened with the new years gartic phone game, where someone made a prompt about a ship that made me heavily uncomfortable. To put it loosely it reminded me of an extremely bad experience with a fandom a few years ago when I called out a ship for being creepy and having a huge age gap but I was constantly dogpiled and harassed. It was probably the worst experience I’ve had on the internet and to this day I get really scared of people hating on me and I apologise for everything likely stemming back from the situation.

I tried to persist with the game but I got really upset and left. I expressed on my blog how uncomfortable I felt about the whole situation. Then this one person, who’s a prominent figure in the Milgramblr community, I won’t name them but I think you’ll know who, replied on my post saying that “it’s ok because…” in such an awful tone. It’s hard to explain but basically it felt really bad as they completely dismissed my feelings about the situation just to justify their creepy ship. And even worse, they way they responded was EXACTLY the same way that everyone else responded back in to at old fandom. At the point to I’d much prefer hate and harassment over that false positive attitude.

I freaked out and immediately blocked them and basically went into a panic attack. I was freaking out on my blog and just to make things worse I saw a post praising them and things got so bad. It was the start of the new year and I was on holiday and was supposed to do a bunch of things but because of that situation I was bedridden and couldn’t stop crying. I had so many nightmares about everyone here turning on me and the original incident and I still have them.

the way the person reacted to my situation was absolutely awful. After my breakdown they immediately went to their blog and started posting about how the ships good and you should praise it completely disregarding everything that happened. I’ve always been uncomfortable with them but this pushed me over the edge. And later on I got in contact with someone who was (presumably) trying to help me and we decided to see if that person could make an apology. But they took way to long to even think they gave any attention to the situation and the apology itself didn’t feel that genuine.

This person was still posting about it and didn’t change their pfp and title despite how bad it was to me and they did not do anything at all. Again I’m not naming anyone but I highly recommend you do not support them anymore. I said I’m going to be leaving for a while but if you want clarification on who it is you can just ask, I’ll check my stuff tomorrow morning before I completely shut off for the week.

I don’t know who it was but there was even a throwaway account hating on me and saying awful things. I didn’t care that much as things had already gotten so bad for me that I didn’t care about the opinion of an anon. But like I said, the sickly positive response that person gave was way worse than actual hate.

and that’s only one part of the story. Another thing happened much more recently with the person I mentioned who was trying to help me. They were the first person I followed on Milgramblr and the person who inspired me to join and make all these theories, so with this and them helping me I really looked up to them. It was a few days ago I think but they posted something on their account about that person and wanting attention to them. I expressed my uncomfortable feelings about the situation and they didn’t do anything about it. Instead they decided to KEEP POSTING about it, like constantly and me getting more upset at the situation and how they responded made it clear that they didn’t care at all. I blocked them and we were mutuals for a while.

It’s been a month and I’m still suffering very badly. I’m not constantly crying as I was when it first happened but it still pains me. I’ve been feeling incredibly distressed on this sight knowing that the original person hasn’t done anything about it and they’re still very close. No matter how much I block them or blog tags I still see them in reblogs or bought up. I had to exclude anything relating to the earbuds collab from my milgram archives as it gives me back really bad memories to the pfps involved. I just can’t feel safe in this place anymore and especially that no matter how I feel, nothing has changed since when it happened and no one’s even actually trying to help me or change things.

I’ve just been feeling so bad that I’ve been going days without eating. Just because I can’t be bothered to get out of bed. The only solace for me is sleep but even that’s not good enough as I might have nightmares and I often feel much more tired afterwards. Things are changing for me as I actually have to get up and do something now and it’s surprisingly going kinda well, but that has nothing to do with this situation.

just to note I will be continuing my milgram archives series, I’ve scheduled quite a few posts for this week so they’ll keep going. For me I’ll completely cut off all activity for this week, and may return on Wednesday.

it’s just. I hate how nothings changed. I want something to happen but no one’s helping

#I don’t know how many people will see this #i don’t even know if people will care about this #perhaps I just come back and everything’s the fucking same #I’ve been considering leaving the fandom because of this and I guess this would be to see what’s it’s like #If it’s better to stay or to leave #I’ve blocked so many people from this situation it’s hard to believe #people I thought I could trust… #To say it once again #If you know the person I’m referring to please unfollow them and don’t support them #I can tell you if you ask for a while #And just seeing all the praise the fandom got with people saying the fandom is such a nice and wholesome space is sickening #It was right after what happened and it’s just awful seeing people say that like they don’t care about what happened #They even started a minecraft server which I wanted to join #But avoided like the plague when I realised it was the person who started the original prompt #There was also a thing that happened recently where someone drew all their mutuals as cats #I ended up seeing that person in one of the cats and knowing that they followed them I instantly unfollowed #The cat pfps just make me so uncomfortable as it constantly reminds of the situation #It sounds stupid because it is but I’m at the point where any little reminder can set me off #But it’s not as bad as the collab pfps which I just can’t look at anymore #Although it’s only with a few characters that really make me feel that the art style in general just gives bad memories #To what I said earlier I don’t know anything about the person the originally made the prompts stand on this #I don’t know if they’re purposely ignoring me I don’t know if they even have no idea this is happening but I’m worried #I’ve also had experiences with a bunch of people I used to follow blocking me #And I’ve talked about it here but no one pays attention

[inkykeiji]

you be my revolver, i got you in my hands

character: choso kamo x fem!reader

genre: curseless!au, smut

notes: eeee first choso piece ever!!! i had such a blast writing this and i wish i could’ve gotten it finished in time for christmas but alas! anyway, please enjoy this and as always please heed the warnings below and stay safe! | title credit: girl like me by dove cameron

warnings: 18+ minors do not interact, pseudocest (reader + choso are family friends), age gap, bratty reader, rough sex, minimal prep, teasing, hints of manipulation, hints of dubcon, size kink, pet names

words: 6k

synopsis:

“Maybe you should stop calling me that.” “What? Why?” you pout, blinking up at him, sugared innocence coating your tone. “I thought you wanted me to call you big brother…I thought I was allowed to…”  “Bi-Big brothers don’t do stuff like this with their little sisters—” “Well, it’s a good thing we’re not actually related then, isn’t it, onii-chan.” 

Choso can’t remember the last time he saw you.

You’ve known each other for a long time—so long Choso’s lost count of the years, now, having met you when Yuuji was just a toddler (and you were, too) at the bus stop on Yuuji’s first day of Pre-K, only to discover you lived a mere few houses from each other—but you haven’t seen each other in a long time, too. 

It’s not through fault of either of you; life had gotten in the way, as it has a tendency to do so, had grown busy with intricacies and obligations that demanded time and attention, tangling around you and keeping you apart. 

You had both embarked on university endeavours; him pursuing his PhD, you continuing your undergrad, had both stuffed more and more into your lives—art shows and book readings and music festivals and tropical trips—and lost space for each other in the process.

Choso can’t remember the last time he saw you, but it feels as though no time has passed at all, as it normally does with family—you’re still just as bratty as you’ve always been (some things never change, he guesses; some things you’ll never grow out of, he supposes). 

Family.

Family is not a word he uses lightly, but you and yours had quickly become his and theirs, had quickly become ours, morphing from neighbours to friends to practically kin, members mixing to form something special, a hybrid of some sort, stuck somewhere between long-standing family friends and blood relatives. 

Which is why how you’re acting—how you’ve been acting, this entire winter break—is so undeniably inappropriate. 

And although he’s lost track of the years, everything beginning to blur together, to melt and flow and shift and breathe, he still remembers the day he told you to call him onii-chan. 

That he doesn’t think he’ll ever forget.

Yuuji’s so lucky, you had pouted, kicking at the sandy ground with the toe of your shoe and swaying a little on the swing. He has a big brother. I don’t. I’ve always wished I had one. Sighing, you looked away, fingers tangling in the chain. But I’ll never get one; it’s impossible. 

It’s not impossible, Choso had responded gently, nudging his swing against your own. I’ll be your big brother, if you want. 

And you—well, you had been so incredibly happy, all bright smiles and sunshine eyes and breathless giggles, to have a big brother to call your own.

Never in his life did he think he’d come to regret such a decision.

But you seem to be on a mission to make him, this Christmas.

Because you’re really testing his fucking patience, this Christmas.

The term of endearment oozes from your lips as if it’s melted in the wet heat of your mouth every single time, always paired with your worst behaviour: bending over in those short, sweet, slutty skirts and flashing cute Christmas panties at him; placing a hand much too high to be appropriate on his thigh as you watch a film together, leaning close to his ear to murmur out a silky question you already know the answer to; twining your ankles with his beneath the dinner table and gazing at him with eyes full of sin, leaning so far forward on the table that your tits swell, nearly spilling from the too-low neckline of your dress, then giggling when you catch him ogling. 

As a result, he’s been meticulous about avoiding being alone in a room with you—he doesn’t trust himself, doesn’t trust what he might do, especially if you start playing your little games—but he should’ve known it would only be a matter of time until you get want you want. 

Because it always is. 

And on Christmas Eve, you finally succeed. 

Somehow, you’ve managed to get him alone in his childhood bedroom—something about wanting to flip through his old sketchbooks, to search for some doodles he had drawn for you many years ago, to rip the pages from the spiral-bound spine and stuff them in your back pocket, for safekeeping, you had claimed. 

Tugging at his heartstrings, that’s how you succeeded. 

Sitting on the edge of his small twin bed, thighs slotted up against one another and both of your arms looped around one of his, he flips through the curling pages of his drawings, smudged with graphite and pastels. 

“Oh, I remember this one!” 

A dainty finger points to a cute kitten sketched out in astonishing detail, with a pink nose and a satin ribbon tied in a bow around its neck. 

“It’s you,” he smirks. “You asked me what animal you’d be, and then demanded I draw you as a kitten when I responded with a cat.” 

“You drew a lot of me,” you lean forward, swelling breasts pressed flush to his bicep, a palm sitting high on his thigh as avid eyes scan over the spread, gaze stuttering as it sweeps from doodle to doodle. 

“I drew a lot for you,” he says, the observation entirely unthinking. “You wanted a specific page, but I might as well give you this whole sketchbook. More than half the pieces in here are for you.” 

It’s a fact that shocks him in its authenticity, a realization that sends a painful, sick thrill searing through his body, saliva beginning to collect in the dips beneath his tongue.

“I’m such a lucky girl,” you hum out in a sigh, nuzzling your cheek into his arm and looking up at him with shimmering eyes. “I have such a good big brother.” 

“You’re spoiled,” he says, but his voice holds no malice, eyes softening as he stares down at you, a small smile on his lips. 

“I dunno about that,” you frown, but mischief glints in your eye. “You haven’t really given me what I’ve wanted all holiday…” 

Blood turns to shards of ice in his veins, whole body going rigid as his breath stalls in his throat, pounding heartbeat reverberating in his ears. 

“Wh-What’s that?”

He doesn’t want to ask it, doesn’t mean to ask it, but the question claws at his tongue, pries past his teeth and tumbles from his lips in a ragged, tangled heap.

And the smile that spreads across your face is nothing short of sinister, that glint flaring to a sharp shine as your pupils breathe, pulse, swallow him whole. 

“A Christmas kiss,” you say, stare unblinking and intense as your hand slips between his legs, rubbing little circles into his inner thigh, a mere centimetre or two away from his cock. 

The motion makes him jolt, hips involuntarily twitching toward your touch, brushing his half-hard cock against your knuckles.

“That’s all I want,” you sigh almost dreamily, tits pressed harder into his bicep as you lean closer, so tight they’re practically being squeezed from your sweetheart neckline. “A kiss from my onii-chan. Though…” 

Trailing off, your hand slides up a little further, pinky and ring finger tiptoeing along the rapidly hardening lump in his jeans, squealing out a short giggle as it jumps beneath your touch.

“I’m not sure that’s all onii-chan wants.”

“Onii-chan doesn’t want anything from you,” he breathes out, but his voice is rough, unconvincing, his hands curled into firm fists on his bedspread, trembling slightly, skin stretched taut across pointed knuckles.

“Another lie,” your lips tug down, voice saturated with disappointment. “You know, good big brothers don’t lie to their siblings,” you fix him with a look, glaring through feathery lashes, expression teetering dangerously on the edges of a pout.

A shiver skitters through his bones, whole body stiffening. His jaw flexes as he grinds his molars, a slow, controlled breath exhaled out his nose, his eyes flicking down. You’re still touching him, two fingertips rubbing gentle circles into his clothed cock.

“Maybe you should stop calling me that.”

“What? Why?” you pout, blinking up at him, sugared innocence coating your tone. “I thought you wanted me to call you big brother…I thought I was allowed to…” 

“Bi-Big brothers don’t do stuff like this with their little sisters—”

“Well, it’s a good thing we’re not actually related then, isn’t it, onii-chan.” 

“That—That—” he swallows hard, dense saliva pooling at the back of his tongue. “That doesn’t matter—We shouldn’t—”

“But—” your lip juts out further, forehead crinkling. “But I want to.” 

You can’t always get what you want. 

That’s what he wants to tell you. That’s what he wishes he could tell you. But it just isn’t fucking true, when it comes to you. 

“Stop,” he says instead, and although it’s supposed to be an order, it comes out as a plead, his voice hoarse, strained, thin, the proclamation high and false and tinny. 

“You’re a terrible liar,” the tip of your index finger traces the head, looking up at him through your lashes. “Did you know that?” 

He does, he does know that. He’s a terrible liar, eyes too honest, voice too sincere, expressions too candid, always giving away his true intentions and forthright thoughts.

He’s a terrible discipliner, too, incapable of saying no, of refusing his siblings anything. You know this, too. 

“St—” he tries to force the word from his tongue again, protest sticking in his throat. Stop, stop, he wants you to stop, he needs you to stop, please. 

But that’s a lie, too, the rejection refusing to take shape, to mold into something audible, something tangible, something worthwhile. 

No matter how much he wishes it were true, he can’t will it to become true—not when he wants this just as badly as you do, his straining cock exposing his real desires to you.

You’ve already taken full notice of it, yearning for you through rough denim, hot and hard and throbbing. The pad of your finger rubs over the slit in rhythmic motions, smooth and gliding, aided by the copious amount of pre-cum oozing through the material, and it jerks beneath your touch, eager for more attention. 

“It’s so hard, onii-chan,” your hand cups the impressive bulge, rolling it in your palm, a girlish giggle tickling your tongue. “It—It’s throbbing, onii-chan.” 

“Yeah? And who’s fault is that?” he breathes, attempting to keep his tone stern and his eyes stony. 

“It’s making me want to ride it,” you whimper loudly, squeezing your thighs together, completely ignoring his question. “Oh, please, onii-chan, can I ride your cock?” 

“Fu-fuck,” the curse breaks on his tongue, eyes shut tightly, breaking away from your invasive stare. “Fuck, fuck, f-fuck.” 

No. 

“I’d really like to ride it, onii-chan.”

No. 

“Can I? Pretty please?”

No-no-no-no-no! 

He wants to say no. He should say no. It’s the right thing to do. 

He’s the older brother, the eldest brother, it’s his duty to say no, to mentor, to lead by example. 

But he can’t. 

He can’t form the word in his throat, can’t mold it into a sound and push it from his mouth. 

He’s never truly been able to, when it comes to you—and he was so fucking stupid to think he would.

Because, as always, you are making it exceptionally difficult to deny, gazing up at him with shimmering eyes like that, mouth licked raw in anticipation, bottom lip bitten puffy from the front teeth constantly sinking into it.

“I—It isn’t right—” he attempts, swallowing thickly, cords in his neck straining, desperately attempting to quell the tremor in his voice.

He knows you don’t care. If he’s being entirely honest with himself, he doesn’t, either, his morality eroded to nothing more than a farce, a thin façade, not nearly strong enough to force him into doing the right thing, not nearly strong enough to fortify his rapidly waning self-discipline.

“I—I won’t tell,” you whimper, and he can see the fine film of tears lacquering your eyes, shielding lust-blown pupils. “Pinky promise! I just—I just want you so badly,” your nose twitches cutely with a sniffle, your bottom lip beginning to waver with infinitesimal quivers, soft palm caressing his cock like you love it. “Please, onii-chan?”

And Christ, you’re so pretty, so pouty, with your glistening puppy-dog eyes and pleads dripping from your lips like thick syrup. 

How could he possibly say no to something so precious? How could anyone?

“Alright,” he whispers, defeated, eyes squeezing shut as he nods. “If it’ll make you happy.”

“Really?”

And just like that, the tears are incinerated from your eyes, gaze bright and blazing with excitement, lips molded into a brilliant smile. 

You look so sickeningly beautiful when you get what you want. 

“Yes,” he nearly whimpers, and it’s pathetic, his hips twitching up into your touch, craving, desperate. “Yes, yes, ride my cock.” 

The affirmative is all you need, squealing a little with happiness as you climb into his lap, fingers up your own skirt to push your soaked panties to the side, other hand pawing clumsily at his waistband.

“Thank you,” you breathe, the words soaking into his neck, sealed with a sloppy kiss. “Oh, thank you, onii-chan.” 

He can’t help but chuckle a little as his hands find your waist, instinctive, steadying you. 

“Eager little thing, aren’t you.”

“This is all I want,” you tell him, pulling back a little to search his face. “S’all I’ve wanted for a long time.” 

He wants to ask you to elaborate on that, confusion warping his brow, but then you’re yanking at his belt loops and pulling at his zipper and wrapping a soft palm around the base of his cock, a heavy groan vibrating in his throat. 

“Wait, wait!” he chokes on a gasp as you hover over his cock, head bumping against your hole. “Let me—”

“I don’t wanna wait,” you whine out, petulant and stringy, whole face scrunched in frustration. “I’ve been waiting! I want your cock in me now!”

Fuck, you’re such a fucking brat, he’s growling as he forces you down on his cock in one swift motion, the sudden intrusion pushing a yelp from your lips. Your forehead knocks against his, sugar-stained breath wafting across his face, his tongue darting out to mop up remnants from his mouth. 

It’s really cute, the way your little cunt spasms around his shaft as he bottoms out, pressed snug and tight against your cervix, desperate in its attempt to adjust to his girth. It’s really sweet, the way your body splits itself open for him, cracking at the core and struggling to swallow him down.

“Oh, it’s so big, onii-chan!” 

“God,” he nearly sobs. “You’re gonna be the fuckin’ death of me, y’know that?” 

Giggling, you wind your arms around his neck tighter, nuzzling your cheek into his skin, then stringing a garland of wet kisses along the line of his jaw. 

“S’really thick, Choso-nii,” you tell him honestly, nodding in lethargic little motions. “I feel so full, onii-chan.” 

A laugh falls from his lips, breathy and exalted. 

“I don’t know if it’s that I’m big, or if it’s just that your cunt is so fucking small,” his voice tapers off into a whine, raspy and gruff. 

“H-Hurts a little, onii-chan,” you admit in a whimper, hips shifting in experimental little movements, conjuring a groan from deep within his chest. 

“Yeah? And who’s fault is that, huh?” he asks for the second time in fifteen minutes. “Who was too impatient to let onii-chan prep her?”

“Don’t care,” you mumble. “Wanted you s’bad.” 

He laughs again, warm and gentle and full of love, his hands squeezing your hips just enough to make you gasp, fingertips pressing his name into your flesh in blotchy little ovals of purple. 

“You have me,” he says, his words ringing clear and true with a painful sincerity. 

The vibrations of your responding hum seep from your chest into his, and he sighs, body deflating against yours, pleasant little tingles snuggling between his ribs. 

You stay like that for a moment to two, wound up in one another, chests pressed flush, breathing as one. Your auras ebb and flow, presences bleeding, tangling together and creating something that is neither one nor the other but both, a single shared entity. 

And it’s nice, it’s real, it’s natural.

But then you become impatient, as you normally do, as he knew you would, wiggling a little in his lap, fingers twining in the strands at the base of his neck. 

“Go on, sweetheart,” he urges gently. “Ride onii-chan’s cock.” 

And so you do, hips beginning to roll in slow, languid circles, fingers still laced at the back of his skull, half-buried in messy ink.

He allows you to set the pace, allows you to take your time, allows you to enjoy and savour every rock and grind and bounce, staring at you through heavily lidded eyes, hands on your waist merely guiding you—keeping you stable, just like a big brother should. 

He’s absolutely breathtaking; gaze glittering in the dim light overflowing with awe, spit-slicked lips licked raw and shimmering as his tongue glides over them again, swollen and bitten cherry red.

You can’t help but reach out to trace his features; the strong line of his brow, the delicate curve of his cheek, the enticing bow of his lips, hips slowing to uneven little ruts as you hone your focus, his eyes observing you with a sick sort of fascination.

“Did you—Have you—Have you thought about this before?” 

The question stings his tongue, revulsion flushing through his blood as guilt pricks his flesh, his cock throbbing eagerly.

“Course I have,” you breathe out with a little laugh, as if he’s so silly for thinking you might not have. “Actually, I—I—”

A sudden shyness overtakes you, an unsure giggle on your lips fading into a soft squeal as you hide in his shoulder, shaking your head a little. 

“What? Huh?” he shrugs, nudging your face up gently, curiosity clawing at his irises as they search your face, voracious. “What?” 

“Well, sometimes I…” 

The words tangle in your throat and you choke on them, gaze fleeing his own, and you shake your head again, chest beginning to stammer.

“It’s okay,” he says softly, rubbing reassuring circles into your flesh. “You can tell onii-chan, go on.” 

There are tears in your eyes now, mouth wobbling a little with the verging confession, and God, that’s so hot, why is that so fucking hot? 

“Where’s my brave little sister gone now? Hmm?”

“M’right here, onii-chan,” you whisper, face teetering on a wince, as if you’re bracing for a blow, terrified to admit to him, fearing reprimand. “It’s just that—Sometimes I do, um, really bad things with my stuffies while—while thinking about you…” 

Dewdrops of shame glitter in your lashes as your lids flutter, nose scrunching with a soft sniffle, tears breaking free of their wispy confines to roll down your cheeks in fat, glimmering streams—so fucking beautiful in the dim light of his bedroom—but you don’t dare break his stare, gazing at him through a thick shield of water. 

“Oh, Christ,” he coughs on the curse, hands flexing on your waist, blunt nails digging into your skin. “And what—what do you think about?” 

“Um,” your gaze flits from his own, to his wrinkled bedspread, then back to his face, wide and honest. “Riding you, like this. And—And riding your thighs, makin’ a real mess all over them, and your thick fingers too, filling me up…” 

Bolts of dizziness sear his brain as his lungs deflate, oxygen eaten up by pure lust and leaving his chest buzzing, burning, some sort of response mangling itself in his throat, escaping his lips as nothing more than a cracked moan.

“Do you think about me, onii-chan?” 

Your question pulls him from the depths of his hedonism and he blinks, your face swimming into view, a peculiar mix of hope and cognizance infusing your expression, eyebrows raised with false curiosity, a smirk twitching on your lips.

Ah, there she is, that brat he knows so well, that brat he’s come to crave, every ounce of uncertainty eradicated from your face, replaced with assured confidence, contradicting the tears still staining your cheeks.

You fucking know he does. 

And, oh, how he wishes he was stronger, how he wishes he could lie, how he wishes he could devour the smugness in your eyes and complacency in your smile, to humble you, to knock you from your high throne.

He settles for a kiss instead, mouth crushed to yours as a large hand cups your head, thumb pressing into your ear, fingertips dragging across your scalp as he yanks you closer. 

It hurts, his front teeth scraping against your lip as he practically gnaws his way to your tongue, his own big and thick and so fucking strong as it overwhelms yours, shoving it further into the cavern of your mouth and forcing it to stay put as he explores. 

He’s making a real mess as he slathers over your molars, over the inside of your cheeks and the backs of your teeth, drenching your mouth in him. Drool oozes steadily from the corners, collecting along the underside of his bottom lip and leaving his chin sticky and slick. 

“Yes,” he whispers, eyes shut so tightly his whole forehead crinkles, mouth wet and sliding against your own. “Yes, yes, I think about you—much too often.”

Nose nudging yours, he nuzzles into your face a little, planting a chaste kiss to your lips, then peppering a few more, quick and sloppy, around your mouth.

“But right now, I don’t want to think about anything. I just want to feel you creaming all over my cock—you think you can do that for me, princess?” His palms cushion your cheeks, thumbs swiping across your cheekbones, then brushing strands of damp hair from your temples. “You think you can do that for your onii-chan?” 

Yes you can, of course you can, you’re nodding, blinking the last remnants of tears from your eyes, rapid movement eliminating the final stubborn drops, clinging delicately to your outer lashes. 

“S’it, baby,” he encourages as your hips start moving again, working up a steady rhythm. “Just like that, good girl.”

A mewl slips from your lips, burrowing your scalding face in his sticky neck again, his undivided attention almost too much to bear. 

“Like it when you call me a good girl,” you murmur, lips dragging across his skin with the confession, streaking him with thick glimmers of spit. 

“Is that so?” he laughs a little, pressing a few kisses to the crown of your head. “That’s because you don’t hear it often.” 

Lifting your head, you scowl at him, though there’s no heat to your glare, fury dimmed by fondness, unable to smother the smile playing with your lips.

A dazzling smile spreads across his own face in response, and he laughs again, his eyes so bright, so brilliant they almost hurt, blazing like two small suns, scorching your skin as his gaze glides over it.

He watches you like a man possessed, a man obsessed, entirely entranced by the way pleasure passes over your face, twisting your features into the cutest little winces as you grind the head of his cock against your cervix, then smoothing them out with bliss as his shaft drags along your favourite spot, bouncing in shallow little motions to rub over that fleshy patch hard and fast, a stream of mewls spilling from your lips, stitched together with his honorific. 

“You’re so pretty when you ride my cock,” he groans, words tapering off into a hoarse whimper, as if it pains him to admit it. 

His palms run up your sides, fingers counting over each rib, hands committing every dip and curve and bulge to memory, marvelled by the way you fill his grip, as if he can’t believe you’re real, you’re here, you’re his—even if just for tonight.

“Yeah, yeah, keep going, use onii-chan like a toy, sweetheart.” 

And he tries to be patient, he swears he does—tries not to rush you, tries to relish in the moment, in each swirl of your hips and every puff of his name—except your pace never accelerates, never moves past anything but teasing as you use his now aching cock to continually edge yourself; moans building higher and higher, louder and louder, on the cusp of the crest before they disintegrate into nothing and you start the process all over again, the delicate fluttering of your cunt enough to drive him fucking insane with desire.

It has his entire form trembling with such vigour it’s quivering the mattress, muscles locked stiff and tight as he tries to keep from moving, from bucking up wildly, from forcing you to speed the hell up. Rough fingers sink into your flesh so deep it dimples, a pathetic attempt to ground himself, rapidly blooming bruises staining your flesh.

But he’s powerless to stifle the whines leaking through the gaps of his gritted teeth, hands flexing on your hips, whole body pulled taut with restraint. 

He’s sure you can feel his cock twitching inside of you, eager and impatient, begging you to move faster, to fuck him harder. 

But you aren’t going to do any of that—not unless he asks for it, he realizes dimly, after you bring yourself to near orgasm for the third time in a row, giggling a little at his crestfallen expression, his hair having fallen almost completely from its trademark spiky buns, braided fishermen sweater soaked with sweat and sticking to his now heaving chest.

He really thought it was real this time. He really thought you were finally going to cream all over him, so he could finally flip you over and fuck you properly, pound you into the mattress and stuff that pretty, cute little cunt to the goddamn brim with his seed.

He’d been trying so hard to be nice, to be the loving, doting, good big brother he is—but he’s also only human, and there’s only so much misbehaviour he can bear before, finally, he snaps. 

Because, sure, big brothers are meant to care for, to lead and to nurture, but they’re also meant to teach, to punish, to put bratty little sisters back in their fucking place. 

“You think I don’t know what you’re doing? Huh?” his grip on your hips tightens, halting you from moving. “You think I’m fucking stupid?” 

“Never, Choso-nii,” you gasp, astonished. “I would never—” 

Sincerity rings in your voice, but he can see it, the mischief tugging at the corners of your mouth, barely suppressed by your façade of innocence.

Anyone else would’ve been fooled—enchanted by your doe eyes and your dainty voice. 

But not him.

No, he knows better now. 

“Bullshit,” he cuts you off, eyes narrowed sharply. “You wanted to ride my cock, but you’re clearly incapable of it—”

“No I’m not!”

“—So it looks like I’ll have to take matters into my own hands.”

“No! I—I can do it!” you cry, face crumpled in fury, nails scrabbling at his shoulders.

“You lost your chance to prove it to me,” he growls. 

The world flips suddenly, momentarily a blur of inks and ivories, a breath of surprise punched from your ribs as your back slams against the mattress, trapped between the bedspread and your big brother’s heaving chest.

“You have been testing me all fucking holiday,” he snarls, specks of spit splattering across your cheeks. “Onii-chan shouldn’t give you his cum—onii-chan shouldn’t have given you his cock at all!” 

A certain type of haughtiness corrodes your shock, lips spreading into a pompous smirk.

“Oh, but you just couldn’t help yourself, could you, onii-chan.” 

“You little bitch!” 

His hips shove forward, forcing you further into the plush of the mattress, cockhead ramming against your cervix. A little noise of pain vibrates on the back of your tongue, shattering your arrogance, and a grin smears across his face, glinting in the moonlight. 

“I think it’s time your big brother teach you a lesson in respect.”

“Y-Yeah? And how are you gonna do that?”

“You’re going to take what onii-chan gives you, and you’re going to fucking like it. And then, at the end, when you’ve gone stupid from the cock you don’t deserve, you’re going to thank me for giving it to you at all. Do you understand me?” 

Defiance shines in your eyes, lacquered by a thin coating of tears, nose scrunching up in a glower. 

A rough thumb and forefinger, hardened by charcoals, clamps around your jaw, squeezing your cheeks with such force that your mouth puckers, a sticky little whine squealing in your throat.

“Do you understand me?” he asks again, each word said slow with purpose, each word annunciated with intent, his eyes boring into yours, sharp and painful. 

Finally, those tears push past your bloated lashes, shoved from your eyes by rapid blinking and rolling down your cheeks in glistening pairs, a half-stifled hiccup stuttering your chest. 

“Y-Yes,” you whisper, nose twitching. 

“What was that? Onii-chan couldn’t hear you.” 

“Yes, onii-chan.” 

“Good girl.”

And then his hips are snapping, hard and fast and immediate, fucking into you with such ruthlessness that it jostles your body up the bed, sheets collecting in little wrinkled bunches beneath you. Your nails sink into his shoulders, piercing flesh through the knit of his sweater, the muscles in your thighs tensing as your ankles hook around his waist, his shirt riding up, your heels digging into the those cute little dimples that cushion the base of his spine. 

It hurts, every pound of his cock producing a dull, throbbing ache low and deep in your gut, another torrent of tears rushing to flood your vision.

“Ch-Choso-nii, Ch-Choso-nii,” you whimper, face screwed up in pain, his name stuttered by his rapid thrusts.

“What’s the matter?” he pouts, and it’s so condescending, dripping from his lips in an over-exaggerated coo. “Can’t take onii-chan’s cock?”

The question wafts across your face in a panted breath and you lick at your lips, sopping it up with your tongue.

“N-No,” you say, and that telltale brattiness is back, watered down by his viciousness. “I can do it—I-I can do it for you, onii-chan.” 

A throaty curse escapes his lips, thrusts stammering out of rhythm for a moment as his cock twitches, and a helpless giggle bubbles up in your throat.

Even angry, he’s still so fucking easy. 

He regains his composure quickly, though, face hardened to stone but beginning to splinter with pleasure. 

“Brat,” he breathes out, though there’s mirth shining in his eyes, pure and fond and full of love. “You better.”

And even angry, he still sounds so fucking pretty; cracked moans and dense groans and choked gasps, all flowing from his mouth in a single stream, fractured by the piston of his hips.

The pain doesn’t fade, of course—it barely diminishes at all, the sheer massiveness of his cock making it near impossible to be dispelled, keeping the cramping pang in the pit of your belly steady and constant—but it does amplify the pleasure, nerves gnawed raw by the agony, left hypersensitive to the sparks of ecstasy that blaze through your veins with every quick, rough pump of his hips, every deep, hard slam against your bruised cervix, every rapid drag over that engorged spot.

It leaves you feeling high, leaves you feeling stupid, brain melting in a hot haze of lust and rendering you incapable of forming a single coherent thought beyond how incredible his cock is, his name and his title the only two things your sloppy, numb tongue can fully scrape together.

It’s all so much, too much, but it all feels so fucking good—s’good, Choso-nii, y’r so-so good—sentiment vibrating indistinctly in your chest.

“Yeah, sweetheart?” he asks, words gone wispy, fading into a whine. “Does your onii-chan’s cock make you feel good?”

Yes, yes, yes, onii-chan, it’s so good, you’re so good! 

Your head nods frantically, fingers curling in the collar of his sweater, a mess of affirmatives fucked from your mouth. 

“Y’know, you’re kinda cute when you’re too cockdrunk to misbehave,” he chuckles a little, biting back a moan as your cunt clenches at the compliment. “May-Maybe onii-chan should fuck you stupid more often, huh?” 

Oh, God, yes, onii-chan; oh, please, onii-chan! 

“Yeah, you’d like that a bit too much, though, wouldn’t you, you little sl—ah—slut.”

Drool dribbles from the sides of your mouth as you continue nodding, eyes wide and unblinking, encrusted with stars. 

“Y’so pretty, onii-chan,” you manage to mumble out, sentiment tangled in threads of spit, fingers flexing in the fabric of his sweater, as if they yearn to touch but can’t find the strength to carry out the action.

And he is, so beautiful it’s borderline sickening, strands of onyx plastered to his cheeks, his jaw, his neck, strung together in clumps and saturated in sweat; damp skin glittering in the waning moonlight spilling through the slits of his window, dewdrops catching delicately in the beams as he pounds into you, every drive of his cock accelerating his pace.

“W-Wan’your cum now,” you slur the demand through a lax pout, lids beginning to weight with exhaustion, heavy as they frame dopey eyes.

“Yeah?” he laughs a little, gaze shining with adoration, and it’s breathless, it’s beautiful, his affection wafting over your scalding face. “Onii-chan needs you to cream all over his cock first. Can you—” a grunt cuts him off, and he whimpers, pushing through his sentence, his voice strained. “Can y’do that for me, angel?” 

“Uh-huh, uh—uh-huh,” your head begins nodding more fervently again, pushing your lids open with some effort to stare up at him, pupils swelling with devotion and determination.

“Then show me—Show me how gorgeous my good girl looks when she’s making a mess all over her big brother’s cock.” 

Three more thrusts and your cunt is obeying, convulsing on his thick shaft as heat gushes around him, so much that you can hear it—a sick, slick squelching as he jackhammers into you, your essence coating his thighs in a shiny layer of arousal. 

“Oh, fuck,” his eyes shut tightly before springing open again, suddenly rabid, ravenous. 

The bed creaks as his hips speed up, skin sticky with arousal as it slaps against your own, the sharp sound mingling with his ragged pants and your hitched mewls.

“Onii—Nii-chan,” you nearly wail, fingers tangling weakly in the hair at the nape of his neck, nails scraping against his flesh. “Please, please, cum, gimme—gimme y’r cum!” 

“Greedy little thing,” he rasps out, voice cracking into a whine. 

But you don’t care, you can’t care, pleads spilling from your lips as your thighs tense around his waist, hips twitching in erratic little motions, crudely trying to fuck yourself on him.  

“Need it, need it, onii-chan, fill my belly with it, onii-chan, please!” 

“Christ,” he chokes on the curse, pace faltering as he finally gives his baby sister what she wants, cock throbbing almost violently while it fills you with hot, thick cum, so much you swear you really can feel it, stuffing your belly as full as it can be, tummy bulging cutely with his seed.

You must tell him that, sentiment slipping from your lips without your permission, because he moans again, his cock giving another weak spurt, hips stuttering as he tries to fuck further into you, grinding the head into your sore cervix. 

“Yeah, yeah,” you’re murmuring, hips rolling up to meet his own. “Push it into me, onii-chan, push it into my cunt nice n deep, do-don’t waste a single drop!” 

“You really are gonna be the death of me,” he whines, face buried in your hair as he collapses on top of you, hips still moving in lazy little circles, shudders of overstimulation rippling through his form. 

“Mm,” you hum, on the cusp of unconsciousness, nuzzling your face into his neck like a kitten, then lapping at a few droplets of sweat streaming down the column. “What are lil sisters for?” 

#choso x reader #choso smut #choso x you #choso kamo x reader #choso kamo smut #choso kamo x you #this ended up being waaaay longer than i originally indended #absolutely no one is surprised #tw:pseudocest

[xamag-draws]

BBR thoughts 2024

Since I mentioned that I finally dusted off an old project of mine and was ruminating on how I'd remake it, I thought I'd elaborate a little, now that I've solidified some concepts. For funsies

This is gonna be a bit of a long and unfocused one, but I don't share my personal thoughts here often, especially the stuff about my projects I always marinate in. And for once it's something that people have existing context for, so hey why not

So for anyone who hasn't been following me for a gajillion years, The Black Brick Road of OZ was a webcomic that I posted around 2013-2015, back when I was in highschool going on college (which is kinda crazy to think about). It was sort of a darker twist on The Wonderful Wizard of Oz, although I definitely leaned a lot more into dark humor more than anything in those first few chapters

I don't think it's available to read anywhere anymore, and I know people have been asking me about it. So here's the full proper archive of BBR, as full as it can be with deceased Flash

I totally used it as an excuse to shamelessly and self-indulgently experiment. It had interactive pages and GIFs and was wayyy too overproduced for what I could handle or what was necessary, but I did have great fun making it while it lasted

Unfortunately, that excess and the fact that I've changed too much as a person by the time I was in college is what ultimately killed it. The direction I wanted to go in was practically unrecognizable from the original idea started back in 2011, so there were many old hold-ups that I felt ruined it

At the time I kinda wished I could start/rewrite it all over, but considering that I pretty much had the entire script done at that point, it felt like a pointless sisyphean task. So I just put it on a shelf and didn't look back for about 8 years, because I didn't know what else to do

Now to be fair, the nature of my art has always been iterative and cyclical; when I feel like my creative juices have run dry I prefer to leave a project to marinate and move on to something else; cycle through other old things and bring in new skills and perspectives into the mix when I'm ready again. Not very productive, but it is what makes me happy to work on my OCs; I'm doomed to hit a wall with them eventually and I need some time to be able to find a new direction

So that said, I'm glad that BBR was left to marinate for that long. I don't think I was prepared, emotionally or intellectually, to tackle it again until now. The Wizard of Oz book (and the entire series of them, really) has always been near and dear to my heart, but there's a lot of context around it that I'm only unpacking now that I'm older

I think I always inherently feel negatively about the stuff I've made in the past, like its faults always jump out to me more than the positives, especially the more time passes. I've never liked that, and I do really appreciate the kind things people have to say about BBR to this day. The fact that it still can be recognized and remembered is very sweet

When I left it, I already found it "kinda cringe", and that feeling only deepened with years. When I took my first look back at it, asking the question "how would I rewrite it now?", at first I took a very cynical approach, as in "everything would have to be torn down"

But the more I sat on it, the more I found that I still see some merit and charm in the ideas I was putting out; I just didn't know how to execute them at the time (not to pretend that I know what I'm doing now, but I certainly know more at least). Turns out a lot of my old concepts could be changed substantially with just a few small tweaks. So I'd say that's a nicer way to think about my previous work

If you haven't seen yet, I posted a first draft of my new designs for some of the characters (the main group, the Goods and the Wickeds). Definitely subject to change, but more or less how I see them now

I'm just playing with these concepts; by no means would I attempt to remake BBR right this moment. Call it a pipe dream among my other ones. But just for fun, this is the direction I'd like to take:

Nowadays I'd probably make it a visual novel, with more emphasis on the visual part than the novel because I'm no English prose writer by any means. It'd still let me play a little with the interactivity while helping cut some corners on the drawing part (only some, I imagine I'd go hog wild anyway)

I've always intended for some events inspired by the sequel books to take place in BBR's past. Stuff like Jinjur's revolt or Ozma's rule preceeds the main events here. So I think it would be fun to follow the past of a few key characters alongside the main story. One chapter focusing on the present quest to see the Wizard, then one focusing on the past events (that are maybe reflective thematically); rinse and repeat

I'm also sticking a little closer to the original text in some regards. Not everything that I enjoy from the books would be translated here, it's still just a very loose fantasy on the material; but I'd like to be closer in spirit at least

I like mature, wise and powerful Glinda, I like kind and vulnerable Tin Man, I like the Wizard being a pathetic yet loveable liar, so I'm sprinkling in more of that for example

I'd like to keep some whimsy, but make it more grounded and a bit more serious to be coherent in tone. I think the original TWWOOZ book was a more realistic fantasy in some ways, even for the standards of the time; I like its simple but vivid tactile descriptions and details like bringing attention that Dorothy needed to eat and sleep

I find it funny that Baum specifically was averse to making his books scary or unpleasant, finding that unnecessary for telling a compelling kids story, but they still can get pretty dark and disturbing, at least for our modern sensibilities. Let's just say that I intend to use the Evoldo and Chopfyt storylines for my purposes. In that way, I feel like a "darker" Wizard of Oz retelling can still mostly be tonally in line with the original and balance it with enough heart and occasional humor

I slowly grew to appreciate the quaint old-timey quality of the original series, as well. The first book is both timeless and very much a product of the 1900s. Originally I tried to give it a little modern or at least anachronistic spin, but it was moreso because it's what I knew best, so these days I'd rather intentionally lean into the time period. Still not fully historically accurate by any means, but at least directly acknowledging the influence

The events of the story span across 40 years of these characters' lives, so I'm drawing inspiration from the entire so-called La Belle Epoque: the time period around 1880s-1920s. Basically I'm cooking, and my soup is old Victorian fashion morphing into Edwardian fashion and slowly inching towards flappers

Some new Dolly outfits

Lots of crazy things, political changes and innovations were happening at the turn of the century, which I think is noted and reflected by Baum in the books as well; the character of Tik-Tok might not blow any minds now, but he was one of the first robot characters in literature at that point; and don't even get me started on Jinjur, etc. Plenty of really interesting stuff one could lightly ponder in an Oz adaptation these days

Aesthetically, art nouveau has always been a big artistic influence for me, and it'd definitely be its time to shine here. John R. Neill's illustrations of the Oz books often keep me company as well. Nouveau architecture in particular fits that fairytale whimsy extremely well imo

I'd allow myself a little bit of art deco here and there, but ultimately its intimidating geometrical splendor is an antithetical to the flowery nature of nouveau and I associate it with a completely different era. Definitely fitting some characters like my Wicked Witch of the West, but shouldn't be overused

One of my main problems with the original BBR was that eventually I lost track of what it was even about; and the original ending felt too mean and unfulfilling to be worth it. Now I'd like to stick to the theme of home and family as my main theme, but in a different, more bittersweet way than in the book

An interesting connection I made is that a lot of my aforementioned older key characters (the Witches, Jinjur, the Nome King, etc) all came from the same reformatory as kids, that's how they know each other. In my recent research I learned that in those reformatories it was usually frowned upon to release the children back to the families, which were seen as the original corrupting influence regardless of the circumstance. The reformatory did everything in its power to cut that connection and make itself the only family those wayward kids were supposed to know and love. That's an unexpected tie into the theme of home that I'd like to explore as well

So yeah that's the current state of it. I have a bunch of outfit concepts I'm slowly cooking, although I'm now sure whether I'd post them... But I do miss these funny guys, and I'm glad some people still do as well :)

#my art #xam rambles #the black brick road of oz #long post #ohsees tag

[fatuismooches]

Imagine the 3.8 Secret Summer Paradise event but with Wanderer and you. Nahida sends Wanderer to investigate something in the desert and you tag along for fun but you two get sucked into a magic bottle somehow?! Klee dubs his title as the “Sorcerer” - her mage sidekick - and yours as the “Soldier” - her protecter! (Or whatever you want, I’m bad at this.)

The rollercoasters are nothing compared to Wanderer’s flights of fright. He will do loops, twists, turns, upside downs in the air all while holding YOU… at least in the rollercoaster there are seats. Klee is amazed by your endurance and wants to try flying too! (Wanderer reluctantly gives her a piggy back ride and flies a safe distance up from the ground… Kaeya’s watching him very carefully, but you vehemently reassure him that Wanderer would never hurt a child. The cavalry captain actually grows to like him!) Though you manage to convince Wanderer to ride a slow rollercoaster with you. There’s no one else in the Choo-Choo Cart, and it’s late at night. Wanderer lays on your lap as you play with his hair, the both of you silent as you stare out the window, taking in the lovely sights of this realm.

Idyia’s quite scared of Wanderer at first but overtime she comes to fawn over and admire how deep your love is, she’s met many people in her little bottle, but no one has ever had a relationship like yours! Not to mention, Zosimos takes inspiration from the two of you for his characters. And speaking of plays, I think despite the fact the one the group acted out had poor plot, Wanderer finds joy in it, because I believe he likes the arts/dance/performances, and also he found Klee’s acting endearing. (When Kaeya runs out of stories for her, Wanderer takes over and tells her Inazuman folktales!)

Collei is extremely nervous speaking to Wanderer, but finds herself liking him more than she expected. She feels like she can… relate to him, for some strange reason? She doesn’t really understand, since she’s never met him before, but she doesn’t question it. Plus, she knows you’re a really nice person, so you wouldn’t date someone who’s mean, anyway. Eula is suspicious of him at first too, but seeing Collei warm up to him makes her tolerate him, while Kokomi finds the stranger very interesting. She has a few chats with Wanderer, and the things he says about Inazuma has her only more curious. The most important part is, Klee wants to be the flower girl at your wedding, whenever that happens.

Moving on, Wanderer has a soft spot for the Hydro Eidolons because they remind him a bit of the Aranara. He acts all annoyed when they want to play hide and seek with him but secretly he enjoys it (and you’re enjoying his fervent denial at being soft.) You two play all of the games together, although Wanderer is less enthusiastic about it than you (as usual of course) but he actually enjoys Bing-Bang Finchball! :3 (He wonders if his creator and that kitsune would like it, too.) Most of all, Wanderer especially enjoys the solitude he gets at certain places of the realm. Sometimes you’re with him, sometimes you’re not, but when you are, during these moments he’s oddly quiet and clingy. Sometimes he still struggles to accept his life and what he’s been through. But making memories like these with you make him happy.

At the end of your stay, when you have to bury a treasure to leave behind, you put in two dolls of Wanderer and you that you quickly made in the mirage! (Wanderer had taught you how to make them that nicely.) You didn’t show your lover at first, a bit embarrassed and scared of his reaction, but he found out anyway and sighed, but pulled down his hat to cover his blush. He flew you to a beautiful spot with the best view, and you two buried it together. You wonder if it would still be there if you ever visited again.

Even after many years pass, Idyia never fails to tell the engrossing tale of the grouchy puppet and his darling lover, an unlikely but loving couple. Maybe if you’re lucky, you could meet them spending their days strolling the streets of Sumeru with the young Archon.

Overall, an unplanned but very necessary vacation that Wanderer needed. Nahida had a blast listening to all of your stories! (And happy he has made some more friends, which he of course denies that accusation.) 

#smooches talks #can you see my need to push wanderer into everything possible #(i love him) #scaramouche x reader #wanderer x reader #scaramouche fluff #wanderer fluff #scaramouche #wanderer #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #genshin impact

[uva124]

So yeah, I finished the drawing of Asha's redesign from Wish :D, maybe I'll make some changes in the future, but I'm happy to have finished it, it should be noted that I haven't seen the movie. , so I can't give my opinion on it yet, but I found it very interesting that their fandom is mainly made up of people who rewrote or made their own version of the movie, they are all very creative and it got me out of an artistic block. that I had a few months ago, but above all I found the rewriting of @annymation which is the one I have been most hooked on, so I wanted to do some redesigns of the characters coming out of its rewriting, that's why everything that has to do with the story of this version of Asha, as well as her personality and her world on which I base my drawing are the ideas and work of this account: @annymation

I'm just making a drawing of her character and how I would design her as well as sharing part of the process I had to do to draw her because, why not?

BOARD:

The first thing I had to do was put together a table full of references that reminded me of the character and things that I would like to add to her design, so I used milanote to do it:

-Looked for some Asha's concept art and save the ones I liked the most, and add the main colors that I used in the design. -I also created notes to write down the personality of the character and some of his data to have a better guide, I did a little research and found publications that talked a lot about Asha's discarded designs and how Disney workers had put that she had tribe ancestry Amazigh on his mother's side and since his father was from the Iberian Peninsula, that's why the next thing I wanted to do is research more about their culture. -I am not an expert on this topic, nor do I belong to the cultures from which Asha has ancestry, so you can comment on any correction regarding this topic, I wanted to implement details of this culture to her design and I would really like to give a correct representation :)

HAIRSTYLE

Continuing with the theme, I saw that the hairstyles in the Amazigh culture mostly had this type of colorful decorations on their braids and dreadlocks, that's why I also posted these reference photos for Asha's hairstyle.

-Finally I decided that Asha would not have all her hair full of braids or dreadlocks, but only a few accompanied by these decorations with a great variation of colors, although it was fun to sketch the many hairstyle options that I had in mind based on these concept art and other photos that I had saved

TATTOOS:

-Another detail that I liked was giving Asha some tattoos with designs from the Amazigh culture, because I saw that it was quite common for women to get them, the tattoo on her forehead is a symbol of protection against bad influences, that's why the The middle symbol is responsible for deflecting it in the 4 directions, I also added a similar one in Asha's right hand.

ASTROLOGY AND THE SPACE:

-An important part of Asha's rewrite is her knowledge of astronomy inherited from her father, especially with the stars for obvious reasons xd, so in addition to adding constellations to her dresses, research the meaning (or something like that) of the planets. Only 3 really reminded me of the character, which were: -Mars: Symbolization of the internal conquering function of moving forward, independent, self-determined, enduring failures with new energy, courage and energy to fight for your desires. -Saturn: Maturity, effort to solidly build realistic criteria, frustrations are transformed into objectives to continue growing, critical and realistic, far from getting frustrated when an objective does not work, you strive to move forward and obtain even more resistant and solid achievements, perseverance , and tenacity (I feel like yhis it the most similar to Asha :D) -Moon: protective role, feeling very vulnerable outside your known areas, feeling of security with your ties, importance of family ties. The one that reminded me the most of Asha was Saturn, that's why I drew those Saturn-shaped earrings :).

SUITS:

I looked for references and placed some on milanote, I noticed that the concept art was mainly divided into whether the dresses have lilac colors or warm colors, I decided to draw 2 models based on the discarded designs, although at first I thought of using only one color palette lilac and bluish, I realized that the reddish colors of her dress reminded me of Mars which has certain meanings that in my opinion coincide with Asha's personality. In the end I didn't decide what wardrobe she would primarily have 😅, but I like to think that in this version of Wish, Asha would have wardrobe and hairstyle changes like in some older Disney movies.

-These are some of the concepts that I mainly used for my version of the dresses

FINAL COMMENTS:

I am satisfied with the result, it was fun to make all this, although what I researched mostly seems little, it actually cost me several hours and I did it at night, so as a funny fact the next day I was explaining all this information to my mother and I felt like I looked like that:

(Make this drawing was so funny LMAO)

(Apologies if there are errors in my writing, English is not my first language and my writing is very basic)

#wish asha #wish movie #wish 2023 #disney wish #wishrewrite #wish rewrite #redesign #asha #sketch #art #digital art #artists on tumblr #artwork #my art #illustration #drawing #design #disney #my draws #digital painting #digital drawing #digital illustration #artist #wish disney #wish #queen amaya #wish star #magnifico wish #magnifico x amaya #king magnifico

[billskeis]

HEASIAIZIA HAI

CAN YOU MAKE LIKE BILL BEING A POLICE OFFICER AND THE READER DOING SOME STUFF THAT COULD GET HER IN JAIL BUT LIKE ok LISTEN she does the "everybody knows that im a good girl officer" thing (song by Lana del rey playing dangerous) and he lets her go but like the next day they meet again and go on a date and HOOKUP but he punishes her for doing that stuff (perhaps if it could be spraying on like stores if you get me) like punishes her not letting her release TYING HER WITH THE HANDCUFFS UGHHHHahhshshsHAJDSJS

ᡣ𐭩 police officer bill

police lights flash behind as you attempt to catch your breath in an alleyway. on the run, you’re currently hiding from the police as they’ve caught onto you and a couple of fiends vandalizing public buildings with vulgar graffitis.

as you hide your body behind a garbage chute, you kneel down to make yourself less known to the open world.

shouts boom across the street seeming as though a few of the cops have already caught onto your other friends.

bless the heavens that you weren’t caught.. yet.

“haah.. phew..! i think, i think i made it out alive!” speaking to yourself as somebody else was there.

“i don’t exactly think so, schatz.”

“oh sh—”

in your feeble escape, you try to make a run for it until a pair of arms latch onto your shoulders and push your body up against theirs.

“fuck! ow..”

“you really thought that you could get away..?”

you turn to look at the body that’s pressed up against yours. he was tall, and really pretty, actually you wondered why he didn’t just work as a model instead of being a police officer.

black locs adorned his face, with an eyebrow piercing accompanying his right, are they allowed to wear those on duty?

whatever, it makes him look hot.

“well.. i’ve been such a good girl officer.”

“my ass, you’ve been vandalizing the streets and these buildings for weeks and you know it.”

“it adds a little.. character! what can i say, this city could use a little colour to it.”

“as much as i love art, princess, what you’re doing is ILLEGAL.”

“no, what’s illegal is how hard you have this gun pressed into my backside, it hurts.”

“..?”

“um hello?? officer—”

you turn to find his name tag attached to the right side of his uniform. bill. officer bill.

“officer bill, can you at least move your gun to—i don’t know—the side more??”

“oh my sweet little thing.. that isn’t a gun.”

…

“oh.”

your eyes meet his, dark brown irises highlighted in the sunny light, his lips curled into a downward smile although his voice stern. it seems as though this police officer enjoys having you up against him.

you feel a rush of heat go to your cheeks, so you turn your body around. embarrassed, why? fuck if you’d know..

well maybe it’s the fact that the officer that currently has you captive in the back of an alleyway is not only super fucking gorgeous but he’s PACKING.

“i.. i—”

“i’m going to let you go.”

he releases his grip on you and you turn your full body to meet him once more, truly relishing in how tall and slim fit his figure is built. you have to look up at him to make eye contact.

“although under one condition,”

“and that is?”

“you go on a date with me,”

“fuck no. i’d rather be caught dead than go on a date with a police officer.”

truth be told, you did wanna go on this date, but your stubborn nature wouldn’t allow you to say yes so easily. you really wanted to test the waters and see how persistent bill was in getting that date.

“fine then, i am obligated to then turn you in.”

“waitwaitwait nevermind i’ll go on that date with you.”

fuck yourself for being this easy..

this little shit, how dare he pull the authority card on you after you had done something illegal and he do his job?? his face once emotionless now held a smirk on his lips before he slipped you a small paper.

“good girl. now stay here for a little longer, i’ll let the others know i couldn’t find you.“

“..kay, but i’m expecting a lot from you just so y’know..”

you wave him off goodbye as you see his figure disappear from away the alleyway. hearing voices chatter, you can only assume he came up with an excuse to let you off the hook in exchange for a date with you.

“oh trust me princess, i will exceed those expectations.”

“i—um..”

“use your words f’me princess,”

“how is this a date!?”

you’re currently on his bed, the tight little number that you wore is currently riding up your thighs as you clench them together.

prior to this, bill took you out to a restaurant that was AMAZING, and insisted that you go back to his house to drink a bit more.

to your naivety, bill had other intentions underlying his silver tongue words.

with your cunt hovering right above the tip of his dick, you cannot find the words to speak. how is this even possible?? how dumb could you be to sleep with a cop?? stupid stupid y/n.

with each hand on the side of your waist, the soft pads of bill’s fingertips graze over your skin sending a shiver up your spine.

“you’re leaking onto me schatzi, sure you don’t want this?”

“shut up..”

with a harsh slam, bill pulls your hips flush to his, bottoming out. you let out a surprised squeak as your walls molds to his shape.

now you’ve had sex before but not with someone this big, the stretch is something you gotta get used to.

if you were to fuck him again.

“you better watch your mouth, maus.”

“f-fuck.. a little warning would be nice, no?”

“hm, nah..”

bill uses his hands to grasp each side of your ass before lifting you up to slide you up and down his length, the stretch burning a bit but it quickly subsides as he makes you ride him.

electricity sparks from within your body and you feel your stomach starting to clench. every time he brings your butt down to touch his thigh your clit rubs his abdomen momentarily.

with your orgasm coming close, you don’t even care about the noises that fall out of your mouth. you sound like a total slut. not that bill even cares.

“i-i’m close..”

he stops.

“bill..!”

“i don’t think you deserve to come yet.”

you grind your hips in circles in an attempts to release but he brings a hand to spank your ass.

“o-ow..”

“gimme a reason to let you release, hm? you been acting up for weeks, plus the multiple warnings the force has given you just hasn’t stopped you from committing crimes has it..?”

you bite your lip in a remains of silence. no way in hell were you going to beg bill to let you come.

he wraps his arms around your waist to bring your torso closer to his, now bringing his mouth to your bare chest to lick a stripe up from in between your breasts.

a moan in approval slips out of bill’s mouth as he then brings his tongue to lick around your right nipple swirling his tongue around it.

he bites on the bud eliciting a wince out of you. your hips still on his, an achy feeling still felt in your cunt as you yearn for more.

“so? what’s it gonna be maus?”

“please..”

“please what?”

“let me come.. bill,”

“okay, but i have another condition for you.”

you cock your head to the side in confusion, wondering what he’s up to now. that is until he releases an arm off you to reach for something on the bedside table.

oh fuck no.

“you kinky shit, handcuffs?”

“it’s apart of my get-up what can i say?”

“n-no.. i’m not wearing those.”

“well then i guess you can’t cum! i can sit and wait here all night baby.”

tears begin to well from your eyes, all you want is the sweet bliss of release and the man who wanted a date with you in the first place clearly isn’t give it to you unless you put your pride aside.

well, fuck it.

you present your wrists pressed together in front of bill, looking around the room in shame. a smirk falling down on his face as he clicks the metal gadget around your limbs now connected with one another.

“good girl.”

again with no warning, bill pistons his hips up into you at a harsh and fast pace. without falter, he keeps his rhythm to which you cannot catch up to.

choking on your words, all you can do is hold onto him for stability, the pressure brought to your g spot by his tip feels amazing.

“b-bill..”

“gonna be good f’me?”

“yes..!”

your legs begin to shake and quiver as your orgasm washes down on you but bill is nowhere near done with you, never stopping his hips.

“shit, looking at how you’re sucking me in..”

“gonna cause more trouble for me and my friends?”

you’re panting so hard and your brain and legs have become so mushy only small whimpers and whines fall out of your mouth. bill clearly isn’t satisfied with your behaviour, biting into your shoulders.

“answer me.”

“ung! n-no! ‘m sorry. hic ‘m so sorry billy i won’t c-cause you anymore trouble just—hic—please slow down..!”

your cunt all sensitive and sloppy, only squelching noises can be heard in bill’s bedroom as be fucks his dick into you. body so sensitive and overstimulated you let him do you as he pleases.

he leaves sloppy kisses all over your neck and chest calling you dirty names but you can’t help but clench around him even more, milking his cock as if its asking for his seed.

your words fall onto deaf ears, clearly, as all bill does is go even faster at an inhumane pace you didn’t even know was possible.

“a-ah.. i can’t.. ‘m done, bill.. no more..”

“almost done baby, okay? just be a good girl for me and let me do the work..”

“a-ah nooo..”

it hurts. the pressure hurts. but its hurts so good.. with a final thrust, bill finally comes, releasing into your walls with his dick all nice and pressed up into your cervix.

“s-shit, coming..”

his moans are low and nasally. mouth agape and hands still on your hips with a grip so tight his nails dig into your skin leaving a trail of red marks.

your tummy feels warm and full, and bill’s thrusts in riding out his orgasm becomes all sloppy and sticky with how wet your cunt was.

you’re a hot mess, hair falling everywhere and body all sweaty. mouth lolled out as your head rest atop bill’s shoulder drool falling out.

he taps your shoulder and you raise your head to look at him, unable to open your eyes with how bill fucked the energy out of you.

“you okay maus?”

“mhm..” you nod at him as he places a sweet and gentle kiss onto your lips. all you can do is blush and smile, taking in how pretty bill is for a cop.

he shifts while still inside you, grabbing a key to unlock the handcuffs that left little marks of bruising on your wrist.

you rub your hands to smooth over the irritation. bill taking note of this swiftly grabs them and places a kiss on top of the marks. your cheeks burn red as he burn a gaze into your eyes, not looking away.

“did so damn good schatz, hope i fucked all that crime committing business outta ya.”

a/n : i hate this. i’m so sorry anon i feel like i disappointed you 😔😔😔

#tokio hotel #tokio hotel x y/n #tokio hotel x you #tokio hotel x reader #tokio hotel smut #bill kaulitz #bill kaulitz x y/n #bill kaulitz x you #bill kaulitz x reader #bill kaulitz smut #2000s #fyp

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Aita for not making any of my characters, that I have to crank out daily, pansexual/polysexual/omnisexual specifically and only making them bi?

🏳️‍🌈👶🏼 so i can recognize this later lmao also I'm not panphobic or anything, this isn't about the validity of the label, pan is fine.

So i (20snb bi) have a project I'm working on where I take all the characters from a specifc media I'm into and pair them up with each other to make every possible ship kid from every possible ship(excluding characters who are kids themselves or are related or something, that shit is gross). Basically taking every character and pairing them up with another and creating a kid I think they'd have. Its a big project with lots of characters and I'm easily over 400 at this point. I really enjoy this, even if I'm not even 25% complete.

However I set a schedule for myself that at least one ship kid needs to come out each day which, considering I draw them, color them and give them some development and some even have siblings, (The refs themselves easily take me an hour to an hour and a half) I have to make lots of them quickly to keep up with my daily grind. I've been doing this project for over a year and although it's stressful, I can get them out quickly with breaks for myself.

Their character sheets all have some pretty basic info like their name, gender, pronouns, personality and more but it also includes their sexuality/orientation. I have a pretty basic list of options for what their sexuality will be: straight, lesbian, gay, Enbian, bi, Aro, ace and aroace with a few random things like polyam, WLW and a good amount of the something-loving-something/juvelic terms. I did this because, well, there's not many entirely unique orientations outside of them and although I love mogai/xenogenders and complex identities, I dont want to potentially drag up discourse or bring problems to my budding art blog over it. Its just not worth it to me to turn something I really care about on its head, even if I like microlabels.

In this case, I'm using bi as an umbrella term as most of the other terms share the same definition with slight variations in wording or action but not much difference in practice. We all like everyone, it's basic stuff. However, apparently this is a problem.

I've gotten one or two anons asking me questions about my guides asking some kind stuff like is this lesbian ship kid a butch or femme or Is this picture of them now or just at the age you put on the ref and other harmless stuff. Then things got rude with some Nbphobia but thrice now I've gotten asks:

1. Asking snarkily if im a panphobe

2. insulting me for not specifically writing pan or Omni and just writing bi.

3. Saying that I "clearly dont care about pansexual representation." Then brought up how my primary oc is native american so i clearly care about representation but that oc used to be a sona and I'm native?? Its confusing. (And Lowkey racist shit to just assume any native character is a "diversity quota" character instead of just a person existing but I digress-)

Im not pan, im bi so ig these people assume I'm not cool with pan people which isnt true? I have nothing aginest them, they are just pretty similar and I dont feel like it matters if they are specfically bi or pan or poly or any other label. I don't go into details like that for any other sub-group, not even pronouns and I included combinations and some common Neopronouns. I understand the importance of representation but my project has less than 50 people looking at it every day, Im not netflix or something. I'm one guy on the most LGBT blogging site with a big project and very little audience, I'm not showing people who wouldn't already know what pan is that pansexuality exists.

This project isn't that deep considering the characters in question aren't human/dont have human characteristics.(no it's not hazbin/helluva) Also ive never spoken about lgbt discourse or stated anything remotely close to it beyond the guides just passively having characters who are an LGBT identity. I've not even mentioned all the potentional orientations they could have so I'm not sure where/why this came up in the first place. The most politcial things ive said are calling out a creator in my fandom who outed themselves as a transphobe and mentioning im pro-palestine. That's it.

I mean this is pretty low stakes, I can just block these people and be done with it and this some seriously online shit but I just wanna check.

Am I being an asshole for just writing bi instead of specifying their mspec label because I have to produce characters quickly and I don't see enough of a difference to warrant a change/specification that would ultimately slow and clog an already stressful and complex project?

I dont think I am but idk lol

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

[reallyhardydraws]

2023.

i hope any of you reading this will forgive the essay. i started posting to this art blog ten years ago in 2013 when i was just at the very end of high school, uploading short animations i'd made for one of my final projects, preparing myself for art school where i was gearing up to become an illustration/animation student.

i went into my art foundation course in 2014, still thinking i was going to be going into storybook illustration or with faint hopes of becoming like a concept artist for game/animation, although even then i'd started thinking about patterns...

and then in 2015 i did go into my BA, going in for that illustration with animation degree that... usually when i talk about it in real life, i say didn't really feel like the best place for me. if i think back, the best things i got out of it were two of my best friends, one of whom is now my partner. looking back on my BA era, there's some bits of sketchbook stuff...

and while i was at university my main fandoms were thunderbirds are go and x-men for a bit... these are from the end of 2015 into the beginning of 2016...

then for a little while i was doing this still sort of pastel-ish lineless situation:

and i alternated between that and this thin fineliner type work (pretty sure all of the linearted pieces were done on paper and scanned, and all the lineless were graphics-tablet-only) - it was in this style that i started to offer commissions for the first time too.

and i also had fineliner-lined work in sketchbooks that i coloured with marker and posca pens, the colours of which were generally a bit more intense just based on not being able to slide the hue/saturation around on paper:

also 2016 was when i discovered the spongebob musical just after it's trial run in chicago (which ended in july of 2016) and i started making fanart at that point... which would have the biggest effect on the way i drew (and i did end up handing in a piece of spongebob musical fanart as one of my art school homeworks lmao)

from summer 2016 until early 2017 things were still quite soft and pastelly in my digital art, colour-wise:

and then suddenly everything got whacked up to 100% on saturation. also i was using the binary tool to give everything really thin pixel lineart for some reason.

then i went on vacation in summer 2017 and didn't draw for maybe a month? just short of? and when i came back i decided to change everything up again... giving characters blobbier, more ugly-cute faces with large squinting eyes and big nostrils and i was worrying a lot less about making anything look smooth, lineart-wise. i turned off the pen stabiliser in SAI and let it wiggle.

then... the spongebob musical opened on broadway in late 2017, i went to see it live in person for the first time... and my whole brain was ENTIRELY consumed by my love of it. i was putting that david zinn inspired pattern explosion into everything, even if it wasn't sbm fanart.

as we go into 2018, i started colouring my lineart. my biggest interest was still broadway musicals (with spongebob at the top of the list)

i think summer 2017 - early 2018 is probably my favourite art era, i was at my most bright and colourful and exciting... although i know in my actual real life i was struggling a lot with my home situation and i had been for some time. art was definitely my escapism back then, and i think a lot of the time i drew really bright, joyful stuff to try and inject that feeling into myself.

as for my university work, i was putting my focus into 3D paper-mache puppets:

and i was also starting to do more repeat patterns, mostly inspired by things around me. i'd learned how to make patterns actually tile and repeat in 2017, so made a few during my time at uni just to accompany some of my projects, but never as the focus of them. one of my university tutors told me that maybe i should put more focus on doing surface pattern, and maybe applying it to textiles, but i said i wasn't interested.

i graduated from my BA in the summer of 2018, and immediately began volunteering at the whitworth art gallery doing anything i could - stewarding, helping with arts and crafts, dancing with families...

in 2019 i was still very colourful... i was trying out more chunky colouring on characters skintones that i think was def inspired by tumblr artist jadenvargen:

but the blobbyness and ugly-cute style of drawing faces was gone by here, and i think... the way i drew characters probably had better *anatomy*, proportions were maybe a bit more realistic...

in 2020 i started adding the black shading to under the chins and some other places on characters' bodies because i started watching the anime my hero academia with my brother, lmao (and i was starting to pastelise colours a bit again, these are the most pastel-ish examples) my lineart has really smoothed back out too, though i never turned my pen stabiliser back on in SAI. i think my hand just adjusted. probably seems a bit insane to miss that, but i do.

by the end of 2020, the almost-year of lockdown over cobid had... made me a bit insane, i think, and i moved out of my mother's house and into a flat with a friend from university.

in 2021 i think things were much the same... i think from this point on is where things have sort of settled. i don't want to say stagnated, but i do think things have been very... like this for a while.

2022 - got the most exciting examples out...

also i was very into these little frames in 2022.

and then on to 2023! in 2022, i did begin trying to shift gears a bit -- hoping to put more energy into sewing and making products (like my tutor has suggested back in uni, even though i'd really resisted the idea.) i sold at a few in-person markets during winter of 2022, but got disheartened by the amount of money i had to sink in up front to sign up for a spot...

which has made me VERY grateful for the people who have supported me via online sales. it has really helped me stay afloat in 2023 - AND it has felt more wonderful than i can describe that there have been people interested in my work... especially when a lot of it has been my original designs, rather than the fanart that i expect a lot of people initially followed me for.

i've also... in the past 2 years... branched out a bit more when it comes to 'being an artist' - and have had the opportunity to deliver arts & crafts workshops with local refugee & asylum seeker support charity, afrocats. it's taken me to their home base in a church to hotels across the city where asylum seekers were temporarily placed while waiting on their new homes, and of course to my beloved whitworth art gallery, where we welcomed visitors from all backgrounds: from the typical white middle class visitors the gallery usually expects, to all the refugee visitors coming into the space for the first time.

and through my volunteering at the whitworth, i showed up so often they decided they might as well pay me. so i've also become a facilitator of... creative play sessions, my favourites of which have been outdoors. monthly, year-round, we have 'outdoor art club', where i get to paint with mud and make potions from leaves with kids & families - here you can see me tell you a little bit about it in this video below with 'crempog' a puppet character that makes videos about activities for kids and families around manchester (my bit starts at 01:10 although i am in the intro and thumbnail haha)

and then of course the summer 'PLAYTIME' activities we've had the past two years: scrap studio in 2022, and play market in 2023. it's the best freelance gig ever -- just to hang out and encourage families to be creative and have fun.

in working more in these new avenues... outside of being - as i've called myself for a long time - "an internet artist"... i've found myself more interested in this sort of thing. in being a "real world artist" too. in doing surface pattern design, and being a workshop facilitator, i find myself wanting to put more energy into these sorts of projects.

in 2023 i've also dabbled a little bit more in youtube videos! i have had a channel for a while and have made videos in previous years, but 2023 has been the year i've done the most in. admittedly most of them haven't been about my art, and more just like... random things that interest me (the spongebob musical in particular) but i've really been enjoying video editing. that's kind of an art form too, so i'm including it here!

moving forward, want to keep putting even more of my energy into other things. my shop, with a bigger range of products to offer. workshops in real life, where i can make a difference.

as for my art blog... i feel like i've done the least drawing in many years in 2023, and... well, things have been weird and complicated for a bit in my real life. i hope to draw for fun a bit more again very soon, and to return to doing things in more of a wild and crazy way, to be more creative and exciting with the way i draw things. still, here's some of my favourites from 2023:

thank you so much to everyone who has borne witness to my art journey this past decade!!! i hope you will stick with me, who knows, maybe for another 10 years if tumblr holds out. especially a big thank you to everyone who has ever commissioned me, or bought anything from my store, you literally keep me able to make art at all and i cannot, cannot, cannot overstate how much it means to me.

i'm moving homes soon, possibly into very cramped temporary conditions for a little while before HOPEFULLY starting my real life with my partner. if i can take one more moment to plug my work, then [here is a link to my online shop] and [here is my ko-fi page too.]

cheers, cheers, cheers!

- LOREN 🌈🍍🎉

#also: i did post. monster high and steam powered giraffe fanart on my main blog when i was in high school #in 2012/2013 it seems like i did absolutely LOADS of fanart for both of those fandoms but didn't cross-post it to my art blog #and uh. well. i'm not about to do it now hahaha

[tired-teacher-blog]

Characters : Tattoo artist Aizawa/ Florist fem reader

Featuring : Eri/ Hizashi Yamada/ Nemuri Kayama/ Oboro Shirakumo/ Emi Fukukado

Warnings and Genre : Fluff/ Romance/ Smut and Angst in future chapters/ Multi Chaptered Story

Summary : In a desperate attempt to get closer to the tattoo artist dominating every speck of your brain, you decide to pay him a visit one evening as a client seeking his service. This encounter will prove to be the beginning of something much bigger between you two, but will this new found passion be enough to stand against the difficulties your future holds?

Notes : Loosely inspired by this/ Art below is by the wonderful @/ael-draw who gifted me this gorgeous piece.

Masterlist|Second Masterlist|Third Masterlist

Chapter Count : Part 1 • Part 2 • Part 3 • Part 4 • Part 5 • Part 6 • Part 7 • Part 8 • Part 9 • Part 10 • Part 11

_ "Good evening Miss."

_ "Uh.. yes, yeah good evening!" did your voice just waver as you returned the man's greeting?

It did, didn't it? Why else would he let out a chuckle while his eyes are lingering on your clumsy hands struggling to lock your shop's front door?

_ "Need any help with that?" his smile slowly disappears as he notices your battle against the entrance lock.

_ "Oh no it's fine I got it! Thanks anyway, good night." and with that, you flee the scene after yet another awkward encounter with the tattoo artist whose parlor just happens to be facing your own shop.

Aizawa Shouta, the man in question, is an intriguing guy.

His ink covered arms— coming to light each time he decides to roll his sleeves or wear a t-shirt, probably hint at more hidden art behind the garment.. his long raven locks that usually sit beautifully on his broad shoulders, are flowing gracefully around his face.. the dark circles under his eyes have never been a surprise to you since his working hours start really late every evening.

However, that harsh exterior does not reflect his personality at all, you're certain of it, and even though your short exchanges have never gone beyond the polite greetings and stolen gazes, something about this man simply mesmerized you..

Who is he anyway? What is his story? Why does he only come to work late when everyone else is heading home?

These questions have been plaguing your brain ever since you met the mysterious guy a few months ago, you've always wanted to know more about him, to befriend him, to have a meaningful conversation, to stand closer to him, to touch..

_ "No! This is not it!" you slap your face with a wince of pain as you snap back to reality, you are daydreaming about the handsome man once again instead of focusing on work.

You flip through the countless search results as you struggle to make a decision, "which one should I get?" it is honestly a big deal.. a commitment.

Getting a tattoo is a matter of great importance, even more so when the person branding your skin is the same one taking over your every waking moment.

_ "I don't like any of these." you mumble irritatedly as you couldn't feel any connection to the art suggested.

Maybe it isn't a good idea after all, do you actually want to get a tattoo? Or is it just a ruse to get closer to.. to him?

You place your phone away and welcome your new costumer with a smile, "good morning Sir!"

Work comes first anyway, everything else should wait till later, it has to..

_ "Here you go! Red roses are the perfect gift, they represent love, passion, beauty, courage and respect, so I'm sure your wife will love them."

The man's eyes light up and his cheerful smile grows wider as he hears you reciting the devine meaning behind his choice, he pays for his purchase and thanks you again before walking out of your shop.

_ "A red rose?" you utter thoughtfully as your eyes study the beautiful flowers before you.

Love, passion, beauty, courage and respect.

Fitting.. although it might seem tacky to some, but if you are to have something inked into your skin, then it has to be meaningful and so, your mind is finally set, "I'll have a red rose."

You take a deep breath and look through your giant glass window at the closed tattoo parlor across the street, "I'll see you tonight, Mr Aizawa."

It is as regular as clockwork— your daily encounter with the dashing man, you are locking your shop's front door when you hear him unlocking his own, and as regular as clockwork your eyes meet and you exchange your daily greeting, except this isn't all that happened tonight, because unlike your usual habit of turning around and walking home, you are advancing towards the man who doesn't seem surprised to see you approaching.

_ "Tattoo, I mean, can I get one?" your cheeks heat up instantly while hearing yourself speak, you're being as awkward as always around him, and wish to disappear right this instant.

_ "Oh.. yeah sure, this is what I do after all," his chuckle is intoxicating, and his silky hair glides elegantly as he cocks his head to the side, "why don't you come in first?"

You have never realized it before, but now that you are standing near each other, he is towering over you, it's almost intimidating to be frank, if not for the gentle smile that seems even more dazzling from up close.

You are right, he truly is beautiful.

_ "My assistant should be here in a minute, but in the meantime I'll take care of you," he offers you a seat at the reception desk before removing his jacket and joining you, "this is a first for you am I right?"

_ "What makes you say that?" is it obvious how ordinary you are?

_ "Well, usually people call to schedule an appointment beforehand, some of them even visit my studio and bombard us with questions to make sure they can trust us with their bodies, but you.." he stops for a moment to clear his throat and shift his gaze from you, "you're something else."

Is that a little blush he's so desperately trying to conceal? No it can't be, you're delirious like usual, and being in a close proximity to him is playing with your mind.

_ "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have barged in unannounced, I'll make sure to do it properly and call for an appointment," you're on the verge of tears as you stand up and bow your head apologetically, "good night Sir."

_ "What? Hey hold on! Don't go," he's fast at intercepting you, grabbing your arm and pulling you back gently, "please don't go."

His grip remains on you, a perfect pressure applied, as if he's afraid you would disappear if he lets go, and you would have.

He's standing close, so close, closer than he did earlier, and you can feel his warm breath fanning over your skin, his beautiful smile is replaced with a little pout, his dark hair falls around his face and you almost.. almost reach out to tuck the loose strands behind his ear.

How long have you been standing there, looking into each other's eyes and saying nothing? Apparently long enough for his assistant to burst out laughing after walking in and finding you in that state.

_ "Good evening boss! Sorry for being late but you know how traffic is at this hour." her eyes move between you two, and her amused smirk hints at something that you cannot -for the life of you- understand.

You return the lively woman's greeting and take a step back, you are still going to leave anyway, despite the inexplicable desire to stay.

_ "Ms Kayama, would you mind passing my seven o'clock client to Hizashi? Also Oboro is running late as usual so would you please give him a call? Aizawa speaks to his assistant while keeping his attention on you.

_ "Sure boss, you can count on me." you cannot understand the reason of her mischievous smile, nor why she looked at you while saying that.

_ "Thank you."

Your blush is reaching your ears and a storm of emotions is fighting within you as you prepare to interject and perhaps save yourself from further embarrassment, but he is quicker to speak, "please have a seat." his voice as soft as ever while waiting for you to do so.

_ "Yes, thank you." and so you do.

He pulls out a chair for himself across from you before picking up a notbook that was already placed on the desk in front of him, "shall we begin?"

You shoot up all of a sudden as it finally hits you, "I.. I'm.." you stutter almost inaudibly, squeezing your fists so hard to stop from shaking, you aren't sure about this anymore, maybe you've made a mistake barging in like that with the pretence of getting a tattoo when all you actually want is to see him.

_ "Is everything okay?" he must've felt your uncertainty towards it since he instantly stood in front of you, his warm hands on each of your shoulders, rubbing soothing patterns while anticipating your response.

_ "I'm sorry I'm just, a little nervous." saying those words is more painful than any needles he could use on you, you feel pathetic, squeezing your eyes shut and wishing you're home alone instead of this.

Maybe you should forget about the whole thing and just leave, you've already made a fool of yourself enough for one evening, what else is there for you to do?

_ "That's fine, having second thoughts is totally normal considering that it would be your first time going through the experience, besides, there are some preparations to go through before getting to the actual thing," his eyes are gazing gently at you as he speaks, "let's take it step by step, and if you ultimately decide against it then we'll stop."

You cannot understand his behavior, he isn't laughing at you, isn't mocking you like you've expected, he isn't even showing an ounce of impatience. Who is he? Trully? And why is everything about him just.. flawless?

You nod slowly and take your seat again, a wave of goosebumps is running up your spine at the loss of his touch.

_ "Alright, so tell me, do you have a design in mind? If not I can help you choose, and it should help if you have a theme in mind." he starts right as he sits facing you.

_ "Oh no that's fine, I already know what I want," you answer quickly before pulling out your phone and showing him the single rose you settled on, "I want this.. this red rose."

He takes the device from your extended hand, studying the picture displayed before letting out a chuckle that travels right through your veins, "I like it, it's soft and pretty, just like you," he comments casually before adding, "what size are you thinking?"

_ "Huh? Umm.. I'm not sure but, I would prefer it to be small, I guess..." you're not even sure of the words leaving your mouth anymore as his previous remark sways you, soft.. pretty.

What is he doing to you? Is it perhaps a part of his job to sweet talk his clients? Yeah, that must be it, why else would he do it?

_ "It's okay we'll circle back to that later, now for the placement, where would you want it to be? This can actually help you determine the size better if you're still unsure about that." his smile never leaves him as he speaks, and for a brief moment your delusions lead you to believe that it could mean more than a friendly smile, but it doesn't, and you know it.

_ "I'm not sure about that either," you feel stupid, it is your first time walking into a tattoo studio sure, but you should've been more prepared.

He remains quiet for a bit and you're struggling to understand what he's thinking, your heart is hammering painfully in your chest as you wait silently for him to reply.

He isn't smiling anymore, infact, the look on his face has turned into one of pensiveness, his lips are sealed in a thin line and his head is tilted to the side, and it is becoming unbearable for you to sit there and wait any longer, it's humiliating.

You open your mouth to speak, to -perhaps- apologize for making his work harder than it should, for being so stupid as to make him dump his work on his colleagues so he could take care of you for the evening, you're trying to speak but don't know how to start exactly, settling for hanging your head in shame instead.

_ "Hey look up," his voice is as soft as ever, "I told you not to worry about it didn't I? Tattoos are not an easy commitment to make."

His chair squeaks as he clearly stands up, circuling the desk until he's mere centimeters from you, the subtle sweetness of his sandalwood scented cologne is tickling your nose as he leans closer.

_ "I'll tell you what, how about I make a sketch of the design tonight, and you can drop by tomorrow to have a look at it, I have what I need for now, so take the night to think more about the placement," his eyes are studying your tense frame as he adds, "and remember, you don't have to go through with it, I'll book your session for tomorrow, same time as today, but you can cancel it whenever you want."

You're overcame with a sudden urge to jump in his arms, and for the nth time that evening you are grateful for the secrecy of your own thoughts as you nod in agreement, "thank you that would be great, but, we haven't talked about the payment yet."

_ "You'll find everything you need stated on our website." he replies while handing you his business card.

You thank him again and bid him goodbye before walking out of the studio that is -unbeknown to you- getting busier and louder.

To be continued..

#aizawa shota x reader #aizawa x y/n #aizawa shouta smut #aizawa x you #aizawa shota smut #aizawa fluff #aizawa shouta fluff #aizawa shouta x you #aizawa shouta x reader #aizawa headcanons #aizawa smut #aizawa x reader #shouta aizawa x you #shouta aizawa imagine #shouta aizawa headcanons #shouta aizawa x reader #shouta aizawa smut #mha fanfiction #bnha fanfiction #aizawa shouta

[shroomthedecayedfox]

So, I know a majority of you guys follow me for my art, but I also kinda wanna post some rambles about my interests and the like (a majority being about FE3H). This is me wanting to be a little unhinged on my dash. I'm still gonna be posting art (got stuff already cooking), but if you want to watch me go insane over Byleth's heartbeat, keep reading.

So, as someone who has been listening to the FE3H soundtrack for the past few months there's this really subtle narrative moment that's happening in the music during the scene where Byleth’s heart starts to beat for the first time.

What I mean by this is when you go back and you listen to the soundtrack or the music of the game, you're going to start to notice the heartbeat motif. 

The music of FE3H has a lot of distinct leitmotifs throughout the score. Most of them are tied to just locations or themes throughout the game, but then there’s the characters. Now, I don’t know if Dimitri or Claude have leitmotifs themselves (Although, feel free to correct me if I’m wrong), but I’m fairly certain their routes do. However, none of it comes close to how distinct and prolific Rhea and Edelgard’s leitmotifs are.

Rhea’s leitmotif can be understood as the “Song of the Nabateans”; the lullaby she sings during the winter ball when you encounter her wandering the entrance hall. That progression of chords acts as a musical shorthand or stand-in for Rhea within the soundtrack of the game. It is tied to Rhea/Seiros or the nabateans in general. You hear it again during “Funeral of Flowers”. It’s distinct and recognizable, but then there’s Edelgard’s.

Which is just EVERYWHERE. The progression of chords that follows “Reach for my hand…” in “Edge of Dawn '' makes its way into a LOT- and I mean a LOT- of the music. From the more obvious tracks of “The Apex of the World” and “Three Houses Main Theme”, to subtler ones like, “Unfulfilled” and “Life at Garreg Mach Monastery”.  The motif is everywhere and employed at every possible moment. Like once you hear it, it becomes impossible to not notice its presence. 

But then there’s Byleth.

Now, Byleth doesn’t have a leitmotif in the traditional sense. They don’t really have a distinct progression of chords symbolizing them within the music, but they do have a distinct sound: the heartbeat. The heartbeat acts as a kind of throughline for them within the composition of the music. It’s almost like a solo instrument. Wherein, instead of a progression of chords symbolizing the whole of a character, it’s the musical sound and presence of one distinct instrument. 

It’s kinda acting like the percussion section of an orchestra, but is only included within the composition in regards to Byleth. And it’s similar in nature to Edelgard’s, where once you start noticing, you realize it’s everywhere. But it’s hard to catch because it’s often buried so low in the mix. In the moments it’s not though, it’s very difficult to ignore.

So it's pretty buck wild that the scene where Byleth’s heart actually starts to beat, the song that plays doesn't contain the heartbeat motif. 

“A World for Humanity” is the song that plays during that final cutscene of Crimson Flower and the heartbeat motif is nowhere to be seen. Which is pretty interesting because the player would have literally just heard it not two minutes ago in the context of the game. The heartbeat motif shows up in “The Apex of the World”, CF’s final boss theme. The player would have been listening to it as they were finishing the final chapter of the game. So musically, “A World for Humanity” follows “The Apex of the World”. Something happens where the percussion of the heartbeat motif vanishes between the two tracks. And after this moment, the rest of CF’s music doesn’t contain the heartbeat motif.

In-text, we know what caused that vanishing: Byleth’s heart actually starts to beat where it hadn’t for the entirety of their lives, but the narrative implications of that transition just fits so well with the overarching theme of CF. 

Now, there’s a lot to be said about the individual themes connected to each of the different routes within the game and for the most part, I’ve seen a lot of different takes regarding CF’s major theme as “the cost of one’s ideals”. Which, I’m not saying it isn’t a part of that route. It very much is, but what I am saying is that that theme is not distinctly tied to just CF. I’d argue it’s present throughout the entirety of the game and its four routes. It exists, across the board, within the stories the game is trying to tell.

For me, CF feels far more invested in the ideas of autonomy, freewill, humanity, and choice. That the overarching theme is aligned with the freedom to be your own individual and the right to make your own choices based on that freedom. The ethos of Edelgard’s final speech is the right for humanity to choose its own path. (I can explain all of this in another text post: trust me I want to talk about Edelgard’s final speech.)

But, this is how I largely interpret CF: it’s that strong emphasis of humanity’s freedom and it’s no surprise how Byleth’s heartbeat ties into that.

As far as I’m aware, Byleth’s heartbeat situation isn’t addressed in the other three routes. It’s set up in White Clouds and promptly abandoned. (which is a staple of the game; that’s just how it rolls. You’re not going to get everything on your first time through.) It’s loosely alluded to, but there’s no real pay-off outside of CF. You can outright tell Dorothea Byleth’s heart doesn’t beat, but she won’t believe you. When it comes to Claude or Rhea, you learn more about the nature of Byleth’s birth rather than address the nature of their heart. Given how strongly it is emphasized in Jeralt’s journal, the game wants you to pay attention to it.

For CF, the heartbeat becomes a symbol of Byleth’s humanity. At the very beginning of the game, they’re considered a demon by the people around them and the mercenaries within Jeralt’s company. In the eyes of the church, they’re seen as a figurehead or the second-coming of Seiros/Sothis. (Read that section in the Book of Seiros and tell me that’s not what the devs were trying to do). They rarely get to just be Byleth outside of whatever house you pick. A lot of Byleth’s interactions and relationships with other characters centers on the internal conflict of Byleth being understood as themselves. With CF it’s double because of all of the narrative implications Edelgard brings. All of those details and traits that characterize Byleth often get buried or go unnoticed.

So, what does this mean in the context of the music? “A World for Humanity” is musically reflecting the journey Byleth would’ve undergone during the course of CF. The heartbeat motif is no longer buried within the composition of the music, it’s free to be its own distinct sound. Which brings me to a detail I’ve been neglecting to mention up until this point: Edelgard is the first person to HEAR Byleth’s heartbeat.

During this scene, the heartbeat motif shifts from a non diegetic percussion to an in-universe diegetic sound. It breaks free from the composition of the music and becomes real. It’s no longer just symbolic of Byleth, it very much is Byleth. And what is the immediate reaction to that in-universe shift? 

Edelgard starts crying for the first time in who knows how many years out of joy. Byleth comes-to listening to her basically be the happiest she’s ever been because Byleth is alive. Their hair shifts back to its original color and they open their eyes to show they’re once again blue. The end card further adds to this transition, explaining that Byleth has lost their connection with the progenitor god’s powers. They’re just human and the music, alongside the characters, celebrates that humanity. 

And I find that to be really neat.

#fe3h #edelgard #byleth #shroom rambles

[lianaisabsent]

BSD men when their s/o gets jealous

A/n: might be a little different from exactly canon reactions but technically it includes my hcs so..

CHARACTERS: dazai, chuuya, atsushi

Dazai:

with dazai it's like you're confused and amused more than jealous.

He flirts to get information, it works greatly is what's more annoying to you.

This one time you both were set up on a mission and not even two seconds in and he flirted with the prime suspect and deemed her "incapable of doing murder"

When asked why he responded “I would frame her too, she's too afraid and cowardly and she's lacking financially so her motive would've been perfect to kill.. however, the way she trembles and speaks and responds is a way no killer would be able to.. She could be an actress but her hands are of those of the abused. Meaning she was purposely planted to distract us.. That's something I would do if I was the killer" (plot holes in this but I'm not a detective so excuse me if I get any thing wrong)

You were just gawking the whole time over how much he analyzed from touching the ladies hand and speaking to her softly and sweetly.. It was a mask yes but still it made you jealous.. Not like you were to admit that.

He might have.. He definitely noticed it. Dazai wanted to tease you over it but you were in a professional setting although nothing about dazai can be called professional at times.. Most times..

Bro would tease you so much so so much

You both were on a mission together, a mission to investigate a murder in an art museum. You inspected the places, found some clues and when you came back you saw your boyfriend speaking, no flirting with the staff members.

You knew it's for work, but it still makes you feel a twisting feeling in your stomach. You're not much of a doubting and possessive person with him but it's still annoying how good he is at this a natural some might even say.

You just inhaled and exhaled before rolling your eyes and walking towards someone else for their statements on what happened. They all have roughly the same statement “he was a kind man, a kind man the manager was, the manager was a nice kind man he didn't deserve this” almost led you to think this was some sort of mystery novels cassette tape on repeat.

A few minutes pass by and you feel someone hugging you from behind, you flinched and pushed the person away, person being dazai who was very wounded (dramatic is a better word) “my love! How could you!? First you get jealous and glare at the staff member and when I came to comfort you like the amazing partner I am, you pushed me!”

You could only sigh at his theatrics, 'how is he not an actor?' you thought. “don't bother dazai I know it was for work..” you sighed looking through the information you gathered. He did tease you but he ultimately didn't really know how to respond to that. As he's told you before he cant really respond with that exact emotions you want. He tried though.

“well.. I only 'flirt' for work but ultimately who do I go home to and for? You” it did make you internally embarrassed because he just said that loudly in a silent hall with people.

Chuuya:

He isn't a flirt, his thing is more of actions speak louder then words but he does get flirted with. He doesn't respond to it but it does annoy you a little.

he isn't going to say much just “oh okay-wait what”

I think he'd be dense when it comes to recognizing jealousy, he'd just think everything is fine unless you directly tell him it's not

“chuuya, I'm jealous” “of what? My charm?”

How did you even end up with him..

One time, at a café when you were both off of your work and getting something to drink while you caught up for the week a woman came up asking for your boyfriends number.

He was about to say something before he saw a book in her hand, he did mention he'd been reading a few books recently and that you should check them out if you have time but you didn't have time. You were regretting it now for sure.

“oh you like that book?” “yes!” “oh what was-....” their words were no longer being heard by you when all you did was stare down at your drink counting till when she would leave him. But to your disappointment it was like chuuya forgot who he came to the date with. After what felt like 30 minutes she smiled and left with his number as you glared at him and picked up the butter knife.

You stared at him and he only smiled at you in return, it wasn't intentional you could see it but it annoyed you so much “so you just give away your number to random people huh?” you asked earning a confused look from him, “what do you mean darling?” “you know what I mean, the girl the book ring a bell for you yet Einstein?” he nodded before pausing “oh wait what? You were jealous!?”

He, instead of sitting across came to your side and sat beside you lightly hugging you “sorry if it made you jealous I was just kind of happy because we had similar interests is all, you're the one I'll take to dinner and you're the one who I'll plan to spend my life with along with wine”

It made you smile.

Atsushi:

He is more dense.. He's oblivious, he doesn't even know you were jealous.. Why were you jealous? That's his thought

We all know atsushi has a thing for saving people but people do tend to over think interactions. You have witnessed multiple times where people who atsushi saved tried flirting with him. As your oblivious partner just kept being dense.

“jealous?? You? YOU WERE JEALOUS?!”

He's confused, he doesn't understand

You knew atsushi saved a girl from the guild and you knew she was his friend (?) if you could call it that because from what kyouka told you she just seemed like a shy girl who hates social interactions.. That was until you visited the café yourself and saw her upset seeing you. Had you done something to wrong her? No, you hadn't ever met the red head.

“um atsu.. Is your upset with me?” you asked to which you received a shake of his head and a small "no"

As you say down she came and threw the menu in front of atsushi and placed it carefully to you.. You were shocked to say the least. She the started bantering and you noticed a blush and thought 'oh. She likes him..' it wasn't until after she left that you felt an annoying twist in your stomach and a voice saying that they've known each other for longer then you and him have been together but you choose to ignore it.

Lucy, he told you was her name, came back with the orders placing it and when he called you 'love' which wasn't often unless he noticed something off about you that her eyes almost bulged out “YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND!?” she shouted at him not that loudly to disturb everyone but still nearby customers did hear it. Atsushi nodded “oh yes, I thought I told you last time me and kyouka came” they started bantering again.

You felt jealous and annoyed, she seemed sweet.. But jealousy just made you feel angry and annoyed at her. After your café trip you walked out of the café not waiting for him to catch up. He grabbed your wrist asking what's wrong and you could only sigh "jealousy, I'm jealous, you've known her for longer then our relationship and she even could have feelings for you!” you said to which his response was shutting down literally he tried to process what you just said..

"you're jealous? JEALOUS??” he was shocked and in comparison to his obliviousness you only kissed him. It made him redder then red paint could even get. He was confused as to why you were jealous but he reassured you that he only likes you and lucy is a good person and friend of his.

#dazai fluff #chuuya x reader #dazai x reader #bungou stray dogs #bsd fluff #atsushi nakajima #atsushi x reader #dazai osamu #bsd season 4 #chuuya fluff #chuuya bsd

[cerosin-bis]

Привет, Cerosin.

Your drawings are something else in good way. I understand that right now you are more into COD, but can we expect some KapGlaz arts in the future? Last one was 7 months ago. I don't usually ship characters, but you are one of few reasons why I made second exclusion in my life. As a Russian man, I really want more those handsome Russian men loving each other in my feed.

Заранее благодарю за ответ и успехов тебе в дальнейшем! (Thank you in advance and good luck in future projects!)

Hi! Thank you so much for your message. It means a lot. I'm humbled that you like my art of these two enough to take the time to tell and send me this. I hope you'll see this answer! ♥

I do think I'll occasionally doodle KapGlaz although it's bound to be rarer given that I'm not a proficient artist at all and I can only muster the energy to make one doodle per week, so I tend to focus on what fuels me the most at the moment.

... But my love for these two is absolutely intact. I doodled them upon answering this ask and it's not much, but drawing them - by memory - feels like eating your favourite dish you haven't tasted in years. Anyway. thanks again - береги себя!)😌

#kapglaz #my art #r6s #kapkan #glaz #ask

[curioushabitforarivergod]

dark(ish) academia books that I don't see recommended enough

I read a lot, both fiction and non-fiction, and a lot of the stuff I've read over the past 2-3 years has had underlying academic tones. I've tried to include books I've at least enjoyed, although there are a few 3 star ratings. All of these books are ones I haven't really seen mentioned in compiled dark academia lists (mainly because some of them fall outside the general scope and are more ✨vibes✨). Feel free to add more less well-known books. I've included my own blurbs of the books but I've got shit memory and some I read like 2 years ago so yeah

Fiction

"Let us read, and let us dance; these two amusements will never do any harm to the world." Voltaire

To the Lighthouse by Virginia Woolf

Takes place over 10 years and explores family and the destruction left behind after WWI. It discusses the feminine vs. masculine in art and while it can be a little slow to read (took me close to 3 weeks!) theres some really beautiful passages and also some funny ones as well — the characters spend several chapters at a dinner party convinced everyone hates them and constantly hating other people too.

The Dark is Rising (series) by Susan Cooper

Okay, yes this is a kids book series from the 70s/80s but it explores English, Cornish and Welsh mythology and has really good characters and world-building. Even though chronologically the series goes: Over Sea, Under Stone; The Dark is Rising; Greenwitch; The Grey King; Silver on the Tree, it's best to read The Dark is Rising first and return back to Over Sea, Under Stone. Anyway, I love this series and I read The Dark is Rising every Christmas because it corresponds pretty much with the days and is easy to place and that's kind of what makes it feel very cozy and academic. Also, theres some brief moments of time travel to the past.

The Historian by Elizabeth Kostova

This is a beautiful written masterpiece set across the 20th century featuring plenty of train rides across Europe and vampires. It explores some of the history of Walachia and Dracula, as well as the Ottoman Empire and European politics of the time. It's a hefty read but I loved it because it combines history, dark academia, fantasy and vampires.

Macbeth by William Shakespeare

My favourite of Shakespeare that I've seen so far and honestly murder is so dark academia I don't need to talk any further. Strangely, I don't see this recommended enough.

Hamnet by Maggie O'Farrell

This was quite popular a year or two ago, and honestly for good reason. I think it's only really academic because it's linked to Shakespeare and explores the less well-known lives of Shakespeare's family, but it's very good and I thought I'd include it anyway.

Piranesi by Susanna Clarke

This one feels really light academia to me, but I think it's mainly because of setting. It's set in this fantastical old and crumbling mansion that goes on forever. It's filled with statues and it floods and only two people live in the world. The story is told entirely through diary entries, but it's so well-written because it defamiliarises the reader entirely. It was a light and easy read for me, which is probably why I'm associating it with light academia rather than dark academia.

The Book of Goose by Yiyun Li

This book kinda mixes chaotic academia and cottagecore academia and is a reflection of girlhood and youth spent in the French countryside in the 50s. There's a toxic relationship between two friends who write a book together before one of them attends prestigious girls' school in England. Also the opening lines are amazing: "You cannot cut an apple with an apple. You cannot cut an orange with an orange. You can, if you have a knife, cut an apple or an orange. Or slice open the underbelly of a fish. Or, if your hands are steady enough and the blade is sharp enough, sever an umbilical cord."

Brideshead Revisited by Evelyn Waugh

Another classic! I love Waugh, and Brideshead revisited is amazing and my favourite of what I've read of his. The book is quite homoerotic — explicitly so at times, which is fascinating for something published in 1945 — and deals with romanticisation. It nestles quite snugly between Picture of Dorian Grey and Secret History in terms of a dark academic literary canon.

Northanger Abbey by Jane Austen

This is more gothic than dark academia, but it's also a satire of the gothic genre so I feel like it counts. It's definetly not as well known as some of Austen's other works and feels much more raw, particularly because its her first work (although not published until after her death). It's not my favourite Austen, but I love it all the same, especially because of its commentary on warning the romanticisation of other peoples lives and the gothic/dark academia. Although dark academia wasn't a thing in Austen's day!

Possession by A. S. Byatt

I love the main story but because its so metafictive and explores the relationship between two made-up poets (one of whom is bi and cheats on her gf with the second) from the perspective of modern academics, it can get quite hard to read sometimes. It's also really long, but definitely worth reading.

Non-Fiction

I feel like non-fiction is pretty over-looked when it comes to the academia aesthetic which really says something, given that its… kinda the whole point of academia?? Anyway, I read a lot of history books, but I only put down the ones which I found interesting or easy to read, so they're more popular histories than academic histories. Also; essays.

The Year 1000: What Life Was Like At the Turn of the First Millennium by Robert Lacey

This explores early medieval life in England based on the Julius Work Calendar, an Anglo-Saxon manuscript believed to date to 1020BCE. It's honestly a really light and interesting read and it talks about what everyday life was like, which I think is important in history. It's in a narrative style so it's quite easy to read even if you don't consume history often.

Oh, to Be a Painter! by Virginia Woolf

This is actually a short, published collection of Virginia Woolf essays on art. I read the essays all in one sitting because they're quite short, but if you're into art and art academia, I'd highly recommend. There's also an essay on the cinema which provides some interesting insights into todays world particularly as Woolf was writing at the time when cinema was only just becoming widespread and an industry in its own right.

A Modest Proposal by Jonathan Swift

This is a satirical essay on attitudes towards the poor and it suggests that poor people might sell their children as food for the rich, highlighting the callousness of the upper classes. It's available free online and very much relevant today, despite being written close to 300 years ago.

The Time Traveller's Guide to Elizabethan England by Ian Mortimer

Very useful if you ever find yourself stuck in the Elizabethan period! It's read as a sort of travel guide but includes plenty on history as well, providing a picture of what England looked like in the late-Tudor period. Also people will think you're a time-traveller if you carry it around, which adds to your intrigue and mystery.

A Memoir of Jane Austen by James Edward Austen-Leigh

If you like Jane Austen and haven't read this memoir, you should. It's written by her nephew, so it's quite biased and it's not amazing in any way, but it provides a lot of context to her life and is a good light-read or coffee table book. Also my copy was pale pink so win.

Thats it folks. Feel free to include your own less well-known book recs that follow dark/light/chaotic, etc. aesthetics! I'd love to compile a huge list and read more outside my comfort zone.

#dark academia #light academia #chaotic academia #art academia #cottagecore academia #books and reading #book reccomendation #book reccs #books

[yuyuconfessions]

"I've noticed that younger fans seem to have trouble connecting the dots that a lot of adults on this website were kids younger or close to the age of Yusuke when this series was originally airing back in the 90s in Japan and the 2000s in the west.

Although these fictional characters' stories ended for them at 18 it doesn't mean that Yusuke and the gang stop being important, interesting, or compelling to us. It also doesn't mean that we have to stop loving these fictional characters and their stories after we turn 19.

If you as a minor 14-17 or someone aged 18 - 25 thay feels comfortable shipping these characters, viewing art of them, and reading fic about them ESPECIALLY NSFW art/fic; but your skin crawls that people older than you are creating that content, then you need to sit down with yourself and ask yourself if fandoms that are literally older than your existence are places that you are ready to be socializing in.

Fandoms that are older than your existence will have fans that are MUCH older than you and they are making content and having interactive conversations.

Yu Yu Hakusho is not an Adult Only fandom but it is a fandom that is Mostly Adults.

I fell in love with this show when I was a pre teen. I'm in my mid 30s. The show's target audience is teenagers. But here is the thing: it's target audience was teenagers back in the 90s and 2000s and that's still most of its audience today because Togashi told a fun and resonant story that tends to stick with its audience.

If you can't handle shipping content or adult conversations (conversations about mature topics and themes not necessarily 18+/NSFW but these are definitely present also) about Yu Yu Hakusho then you should try to avoid adult spaces when searching for discussion or content and stick to spaces specifically for minors.

A space specifically for minors would have a ban against all 18+/NSFW content that is strictly enforced. It would not have an 18+/NSFW section at all.

Tumblr and most of the discord servers for YYH that I've seen are adult spaces. Because there is an expectation that while minors are allowed on the websites they must be over a certain age with parental permission because adult conversations happen here where minors could see them.

All of this to say: Unplug from the adult spaces if you feel uncomfortable with adult themes and content or 18+/NSFW content.

Talk to friends irl about Yu Yu Hakusho or find a minor focused space online to talk about it. Come back to the adult spaces in a few years.

This applies to the 18 - 25 crowd also. If you can't handle seeing someone ship these characters or if someone ships them in a way that you don't agree with and it's so upsetting to you that it's causing you a great deal of anger or distress then you need to consider if you really want to be in the Greater Online Yu Yu Hakusho Fandom at this particular point in your life. Or if maybe you want to filter tags on tumblr and drop sites that you can't filter to make your fandom experience more smooth.

If Yu Yu Hakusho has lasted 30 years then it'll last another 3 or 5 years while you get adjusted and engage with Yu Yu Hakusho in minor focused or safely filtered fandom spaces. Trust me. Yu Yu Hakusho will be somewhere on the greater internet when you're older and you've gotten better at self regulating your intake of content online and your response to seeing content online that you don't like.

Yusuke, Kazuma, Kurama, Hiei, Keiko, Botan, Shizuru, Yukina, Genkai and the rest will be here when you get back. That's the great thing about resonant media. It sticks around because people connect to it.

You can love them as long as you want to. They'll always be there. They're not going anywhere."

This mod would just like to add

No one shipping Yusuke x Keiko is sexualizing or exploiting minors; yes, even if the person shipping is 35 years old. These are cartoons, fictional, 2d drawings. If you want to play cute with "but they're 14!" No. Yusuke was created in 1992. He is 31.

If any of the above makes you, a minor, uncomfortable, then get out of adult spaces. Back in myyy day (que groans), any show I liked and looked at online had adult content, like Inuyasha or Naruto, even Teen Titans. I'd be 12 and see suddenly complete porn of Raven, and as a teen, I'd just exit out of it. Now, kids see things online, things they shouldn't see because the internet is NOT safe for kids without parental oversight, and their response is to... yell at the people making the content... for other adults.

If you wouldn't walk into Spencers and yell at the employees there for the vibrators, don't yell at adults drawing porn of Yukina and Hiei fucking. Exit out, or ask your mommy and daddy to put restrictions on what sites you can access. The internet is NOT your babysitter.

#yyh #yu yu hakusho #幽遊白書

[lambertdiary]

Hi! Good morning/night. I have a request for Dalton if you still take them…? The idea is that he and the fem reader have a secret relationship and no one knows, and one day Chris and Y/N’s roommate, Annie walk in on them making out? It’s ok if you can’t just a suggestion. Cheers!

A/N: OMG obsessed with the fact that Annie was a part of this, thank you so so much for your request!! Also I did NOT expect this one to be over 4k words, I don’t know what happened I’m so sorry 😭 hopefully it's not unreadable but pls let me know what you think!

Word Count: 4.5k+

Warnings: language, mentions of blood, heavy make out, characters texting, fluff

MASTELIST ‎ ‎ ‎‎ ‎ ‎‎‎✩ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎SEND ME A REQUEST

Behind Closed Doors

Y/N could tell Dalton was nervous, his foot was constantly tapping on the floor while he waited for the list to be published. Professor Armagan was hosting an art show and she was going to select only a few students to bring their best pieces to show off their talent, and the students that made the cut were supposed to be announced by 3 PM, it was now 3:30 PM and he had been refreshing the school page for the last 30 minutes.

“Dalton, you need to relax” Y/N came up behind him and started rubbing his shoulders, feeling all the tension melt away “Just take a deep breath with me” She started the breathing exercise that helped her feel better when she was feeling anxious or stressed, hoping Dalton would mimic her, but instead a loud puff of air came out of his mouth as he kept refreshing.

“She said she would publish the list-”

“By 3:00” Y/N interrupted him “I know, baby. Just give her a little bit of time, maybe she forgot” She said, going around his chair and sitting on his lap.

“She didn’t forget, she reminded us today”

“Well, maybe she’s busy then, I dunno” Y/N was brushing his soft hair to give him some comfort, and she could tell it was working “But you losing your head over it won’t make it happen faster. We’ll just have to wait, together”

He nodded and took a deep breath, trying to relax just as his girlfriend said “I’m just nervous, this would be a great opportunity for me and I really want to get in”

 “I know, and you will. She’s gonna post that list and you’ll see your name on it”

Dalton appreciated her hyping him up, she was his number one fan and he loved her for that “Thanks, although you’re only saying that because I’m your boyfriend”

“Well, I might be a little biassed here-”

“You can be biassed”

“But you’re like the most talented artist I’ve ever met, and I’ve met plenty of artists” She said, making Dalton blush “I understand you’re nervous but we both know how amazing and talented you are and how much Armagan loves your art”

Dalton’s smile grew bigger. He took a quick look at her lips and slowly leaned in to give her a kiss, but a sudden tone coming from his computer interrupted them, notifying him there was a new post on his student dashboard. His heart started to race as he noticed an email from his professor come in at the same time.

They both paid attention to the screen as Dalton’s shaky hands opened both notifications, quickly reading through the event description and scrolling down to what he’s been dying to find out. He had been holding his breath the entire time, but when he finally made it to the list he let out a sigh of relief when he read his name at the very top.

“I’m in!” He exclaimed excitedly. They stood up and Dalton immediately pulled her in for a hug, slightly lifting her up “I can’t believe she chose me”

“I’m so proud of you, baby” Y/N said kissing his face repeatedly “I knew you’d make it” 

Dalton finally pressed his lips against hers, all the stress of waiting leaving his body once in for all “I’ll probably have a lot to do until the art show” He whispered when he pulled away.

“That’s okay” Y/N said before going back to their previous position.

Dalton read the email again, this time paying close attention to the description so that he could start getting everything ready for his big day. The announcement listed ten art students, and Dalton was the only sophomore that made it, the rest of them were seniors and that for sure boosted his confidence a little bit, but at the same time he felt more pressure since the other students probably had more experience than him. The description stated that each student could bring five existing pieces and three new ones, so he had to start working right away.

He had exactly three weeks to get everything done and Y/N was aware that this would take up most of his free time, and even though it made her sad that they wouldn't spend as much time together she was okay with that because she knew how much it meant for Dalton and she couldn’t be any prouder. 

Dalton started working on his new art pieces the very next day, running to his dorm as soon as his classes ended so that he wouldn’t waste any time. He would usually wait for Y/N and then meet Chris and Annie somewhere for lunch, but it looked like it would be just the three of them for a few weeks.

The four friends have known each other since the very first term, immediately hitting it off and spending a lot of time together, but Y/N and Dalton have been in a secret relationship for the past 4 months so for that period of time they had been making excuses to cancel on the other two and have some alone time. There wasn’t exactly a reason for them to hide their relationship from everyone else, but they wanted to wait a little longer before letting their friends know, mainly because they didn’t want them to feel weird around them just because they were now a couple, but they were planning on telling them… eventually.

Y/N, Chris and Annie were currently walking down the street as they tried to decide what to have for lunch, something that always took a lot of time and deliberation.

“What about pizza?” Y/N asked, looking around at the restaurants surrounding them and spotting her favourite pizza place.

“No, we’re not gonna have pizza again” Annie complained “Let’s try something new, there are tons of options here”

“Annie is right, I can’t eat pizza for at least another month” Y/N huffed annoyed that both of her friends rejected her suggestion.

“Oh, why don’t we eat sushi? Let’s take advantage of the fact that Dalton isn’t here to say no”

“What does Dalton have to do with that?” Chris asked, giving Annie a confused look.

“He never wants to have sushi”

“No, that’s Y/N” Chris clarified pointing at Y/N, who was shrugging her shoulders ready to apologise.

Annie’s eyebrows came together “No it’s not, Dalton is the one that immediately says no to sushi and suggests fucking pizza, literally every time”

“Dalton likes sushi”

“So why does he-” But before she could finish her question, Y/N interrupted her.

“Guys it doesn’t matter, let’s grab something quick so I can bring Dalton some lunch” Y/N pulled out her phone again to look at the time, hoping he wasn’t starving yet.

Annie raised her eyebrows at the way Y/N was constantly checking her phone now that Dalton wasn’t there “Why would you bring him lunch?” 

“Because! He’s gonna be busy and I’m a good friend, unlike you guys, apparently”

They both scoffed at the same time “Alright then, we should probably get something easy to bring back to his dorm” Chris suggested, Y/N and Annie agreeing with her. They ended up having Subway and finding an empty table to eat their food, catching up on their mornings and the usual ‘update’ (gossip) on people they will never meet or talk to.

“What’s with the art thing anyway?” Annie asked.

“It’s an art show, basically they get to show off their pieces to who knows who to who knows what” Chris explained, and Annie immediately turned to face Y/N, expecting her to elaborate a little bit more.

“Yeah, pretty much”

“Good for him!” Annie exclaimed “And when is the art show?”

“In three weeks” Y/N replied. She was eating faster than normal so that she could be back as soon as possible “And he needs to finish three whole new paintings so he’s gonna be very busy until then”

“So does that mean we finally get to watch horror movies without feeling guilty?”

“Yes!” Chris seemed really excited at the idea “I could crash with you guys in your dorm and we can buy tons of food”

Chris and Annie kept talking about a movie night, but Y/N stopped paying attention as she texted her boyfriend.

Y/N: Do you want me to bring you some lunch? We’re at subway :) Dalton: Yes please

Dalton followed that message with a cute selfie of him posing in front of an empty canvas, a blushed face and his hair pushed back, making Y/N smile and blush instantly.

Dalton: I haven’t even started and I’m already having a full on crisis

Y/N giggled at her phone with a pink tint appearing across her face, making the two girls look at her.

Chris tried to look at Y/N’s screen, but she immediately brought it up to her chest to hide it from her “What?”

“Who are you talking to?” Chris asked in a teasing tone.

“No one” 

“C’mon! We won’t tell Dalton” 

“What?” Y/N’s eyes widened as her mind started racing, worried her friends knew something about their relationship and she’d have to explain herself.

“Well, it’s pretty obvious he likes you” Annie replied, giving her a suggestive smile.

Y/N sighed and stood up “No he doesn’t and I think I’m gonna get going, I have a lot of work to do”

“Yeah me too” Chris said. The three friends left the table and Y/N made her way to the counter to get Dalton’s lunch. She already knew his usual Subway order so after buying his food, they went back to campus. Once they stepped into the building Chris went back to her dorm while the other two found Dalton’s. 

Y/N knocked on the door and immediately yelled “Hey, I’m here with Annie” Making Annie look at her with a confused look on her face. They waited a few seconds and Dalton finally opened the door.

“Hey” He greeted the girls and moved to the side, giving them space to come in.

“Oh we’re just here to drop off your food” 

“Yeah, sorry” Y/N whispered, giving her boyfriend an apologetic smile.

“Right, I’m busy anyway” He joked as he reached for the bag Y/N was holding, taking it in his paint stained hands “Thanks bab- uh- Y/N”

Y/N blushed but was quick to reply, not wanting to give Annie a reason to tease them “Sure dude, good luck with your project" She waved him goodbye and grabbed Annie’s hand to drag her away.

“So... what was that?” Annie asked as they left the building.

“What?” Y/N pretended to have no idea what she was talking about.

“What is going on between you and Dalton?” She had a devilish look on her face, determined to find out what was actually going on.

“What do you mean? There’s nothing between us”

“Really? Cause that seemed a little-”

“Annie” Y/N rushed to interrupt her, knowing that the pressure of an interrogation might make her confess “He’s just really stressed out about the art show and you know how Dalton is when gets like that”

“Mhm, I guess but I don’t know Y/N”

“If something was happening I would tell you, but there’s nothing between us” Y/N said in hopes of making her stop asking questions, and luckily it worked but that didn’t stop her from asking Dalton later that day.

Dalton felt bad for the little slip up that caused all the questions, he apologised to Y/N a million times but she didn’t blame him, it was an honest mistake. So the rest of the week Y/N tried to make it less obvious, not staring at her phone as much and not going to his dorm unless she was alone, and she was going there a lot. It wasn’t a big deal to keep it a secret anymore but they decided to wait at least until the art show was over, the last thing Dalton needed right now was their friends constantly asking him questions about his love life.

There was officially one week until the art show and Dalton was nearly done with his second picture, just finishing up the last few details as he tried to decide what he’d do for his last piece. He had planned on doing different techniques and using different materials for each one, so the last one would probably have to be charcoal and thankfully he was pretty familiar with it, but as he looked around everywhere in his room he realised he was out. He was getting stressed out again, he needed to start right away and didn’t want to waste any time in going all the way to town to get the charcoal he liked to use, but he knew Y/N was still there.

Dalton: Is there any way you can bring me a box of derwent charcoal set?

Y/N was finishing up her lunch as she read Dalton’s message, immediately thinking of an excuse that would work on her friends.

“Y/N, are you going to the halloween party?” Chris asked her, pulling her out of her thoughts.

“Uhh- sure, when is that?”

“On halloween…” Chris said in an obvious tone.

“Right. Yeah, I’ll be there”

“Cool, so let’s decide on our costumes, we want to have enough time to plan them” Chris suggested.

“We might want to do matching ones, there’s gonna be a big prize and I heard the group costumes have a better chance at winning” Annie pulled out her phone and started scrolling on pinterest.

“You guys should look into it and let me know, but I’m gonna head out”

“Okay, let’s go” Chris said, ready to grab her things and walk out.

“No! You guys should stay, I don’t wanna interrupt your lunch just because of my poor time management” The two girls looked at her with lines forming between their eyebrows, not really knowing what Y/N meant by that “I forgot I have an assignment I need to turn in by 4:00 PM so I’m just gonna run to the library, but I’ll see you guys later” Y/N left the restaurant and discreetly looked behind her to ensure she was alone. 

Once she bought the box of materials Dalton needed she went back to campus, trying to be as fast as possible so she wouldn’t hold her boyfriend back, running up to his dorm and knocking on his door.

“You’re my saviour” Dalton said as soon as he opened the door, pulling her into his room and giving her a quick kiss “Thanks baby”

“Of course” Y/N replied, happy she could help and happy to see him again “So how is it going?”

“I finished the second one just 10 minutes ago” Dalton pointed at the canvas as he took the box from Y/N’s hands.

“So I’m on time?”

“You are, don’t worry” Dalton struggled a little to open his charcoal, so he just gave up and made his way to his backpack and pulled out a pair of scissors to cut the box open.

Y/N got closer to the newly done picture to admire it better “I love it” She whispered with a big smile.

“Shit” Dalton dropped the scissors and immediately took his finger into his mouth.

“Are you okay?” A worried Y/N ran up to him to check his finger. 

“Yeah” Dalton replied, taking his finger out and showing it to Y/N, a little bit of blood running down his hand “I think I grabbed it by the blade on accident” He chucked to lighten the mood as Y/N examined the small wound.

“You’re gonna be fine, it doesn’t look like it was too deep, just gotta clean it up” Y/N looked up to him and gave him a comforting smile “Where do you keep your first aid kit?” Dalton pointed at his dresser and watched as Y/N took it from one of the drawers. 

He was now sitting on his bed and she was kneeling in front of him, carefully grabbing his hand and looking through the little box.

“This might hurt a little” She whispered before rubbing alcohol, applying gentle pressure to stop the bleeding. Dalton was looking down at her with loving eyes, not even paying attention to the wound on his finger anymore. After a few minutes she covered it with a bandage, softly kissing the tip of his finger before getting back on her feet "As good as new"

“Thank you, baby” He whispered, looking at the bandage.

“Do you feel better?” She asked him. 

Dalton nodded and wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her closer to him making her stand between his legs “Yes, thank you” He repeated looking up at her “Although it still hurts a little bit”

Dalton faked a sad look on his face and Y/N squinted her eyes at him “Really? And I suppose a kiss would definitely make you feel better”

Dalton nodded and pulled her once again, this time making her sit on his lap “I suppose it would” He replied with a growing smirk.

Y/N wrapped her arms around his neck, bringing him closer and finally pressing a kiss against his lips. It slowly became more intense, the air in the room heating as her hands moved to his hair and his hands were travelling down her body, squeezing her flesh every so often. They were too into it, the world around them completely disappearing until the bedroom door suddenly slammed open, making Y/N and Dalton jump away from each other. 

“We know you’re busy right now but-,” Chris and Annie froze completely, their eyes widening at Y/N and Dalton as their faces turned a bright red “...Y/N?” Chris whispered. 

 Dalton immediately got on his feet and quickly walked to the door “Jesus, can you knock?”

“I knew it!” Annie yelled before Dalton could shut it and lock it. Dalton turned to look at Y/N, who was hiding her face in her hands.

A muffled “Oh no” Came out of her mouth. Dalton sighed and walked towards the bed, sitting next to her and softly rubbing her back.

On the other side of the door Chris and Annie were looking at each other, a shocked expression painted on their faces. They walked away without saying a word and went upstairs to Chris’ dorm, taking the lift ride in complete silence, but once they closed the door behind them they started talking about what they just saw.

⋆ ★

“It’s okay, we’ll talk to them” Dalton whispered.

“I know” Y/N sighed loudly as she collapsed on the bed “I just… I didn’t wanna have to explain myself”

“You don’t have to, it’s our relationship”

“Yeah, I know it is but they’re my friends and I didn’t think they’d walk into us almost-”

“It’s their fault for not knocking” 

Y/N chuckled as her hand fell on Dalton’s cheek, using her thumb to clean the lipstick stain on his face “Well, maybe it was for the best. You still have a lot to do and I have a fake assignment due at 4, so” She joked, making Dalton laugh. She left the bed and looked for her backpack “I’ll go talk to them”

“Wouldn’t it be better if we both did?” 

“No, I’ll handle it” She said, opening the door and smiling at Dalton, who blew her a kiss to encourage her.

Y/N figured her friends would be in the dorm upstairs, so she slowly walked there as she carefully thought of what she was going to say. She wanted to tell them the truth, but the fact that they didn’t have a real reason to keep their relationship a secret for this long made it hard.

She knocked on the door and took a deep breath, slowly letting it out. Chris opened the door and stepped to the side without saying a word, making Y/N sweat like never before.

“There’s a reasonable explanation for this-” Y/N began, but she didn’t really know where this was going “Uh-”

“So I was right?” Annie asked. 

“Annie!” Chris threw a pillow at her “Y/N, we’re sorry, we should’ve knocked”

Y/N nodded slowly, appreciating her for apologising “Yeah, you should’ve”

“But…” Annie urged her to continue.

“But I’m sorry for not telling you guys”

"Is it like a fling situation?"

"What? No, we're not a fling" Y/N quickly replied a little offended at Annies assumption.

“So why didn’t you say anything?” Chris asked.

“I don’t know” Y/N sighed before continuing “At first we didn’t wanna tell anyone in case, you know… it didn’t work out but then it was just easier to keep it a secret, and we didn’t want you guys to feel weird about us being a couple”

“We definitely wouldn’t have felt weird at all”

“We also didn’t want you to be weird about it, like asking a million questions” Y/N staring at Annie.

“So for how long have you guys been together?” Chris asked, wanting to move on from how nosy Annie was.

“Uh- it will be 5 months in a couple of weeks”

“Five months?” They asked at the same time.

Y/N didn’t think it mattered for how long they have been together, but apparently it did “I think it’s my turn to ask some questions, like why were you guys in Dalton’s dorm?” She asked, crossing her arms as she waited for an answer.

“We wanted to invite him to the halloween party and see if we could get him to dress up with us” Chris explained.

“Okay, and most importantly, why the fuck didn’t you knock?”

“Dalton is never doing anything interesting, so we didn't think it mattered”

Y/N scoffed “What the fuck guys? That’s my boyfriend you’re talking about”

They both rolled their eyes but laughed at the situation. They proceeded to apologise to Y/N, who forced them to buy Dalton lunch for the rest of the week as a peace offering for bursting into his room without knocking, ensuring they would never do it again.

⋆ ★

Dalton sighed, flicking his collar up once more, carefully bringing the wide end of his tie to the left side of his body and over the narrow end, staring at himself in the mirror as he held the two ends together. He tried looping and tucking and pulling for the millionth time.

“Ugh,” He huffed out in frustration, pulling it loose again.

It was finally his big day and he was almost ready. Everything he needed was done and delivered to the art hall on campus where the art show would take place, his hair was properly styled, the ironed white button-up shirt looked neat and the suit fit him perfectly, but the tie was really holding him back. He sighed one more time before stepping closer to the mirror and trying again, but failing and tossing it to the floor when he realised it looked worse than before.

Y/N knocked on the door and quickly fixed her hair before Dalton opened it “Hey” He whispered as he looked her up and down, admiring her beautiful outfit “You look beautiful”

Y/N blushed and gave him a shy smile “Thanks, you too” She entered his room completely and closed the door behind her. He then pulled her in for a hug, wrapping his arms around her tightly “Are you ready?” Dalton smiled down at her and just nodded in response “Where’s you tie?”

“Not happening”

“Why not? It’ll look amazing”

“Cause I can’t figure out how to tie it” He replied, frustrated as he remembered what he just went through.

“Let me help you” She whispered. Dalton sighed before scanning the floor, reaching for the tie once he spotted it and handing it to Y/N “Come here, baby” 

He moved closer to Y/N, allowing her to finish up his look. She put the tie around his neck, biting the corner of her lip in concentration as she easily tied it for him. She tightened the knot to make sure it didn’t look loose “Is that okay or is it too tight?”

“That’s perfect” He replied, pulling her in for a kiss “You’re always here to save me”

“Shut up”

“No, really” His hand started to softly caress her back “You’re the reason I made it out alive these past three weeks, you got me lunch almost every single day and then you forced our friends to buy it for me, you brought the materials I needed, you stayed here with me to keep me company even late at night so I wouldn’t go insane… thank you, darling”

Y/N blushed and tried to hide her face in his chest “I’m definitely not the reason but I’m happy I could help”

Dalton leaned in to place a kiss on her head, taking a moment to inhale her scent “Y/N?” He whispered and she only hummed, but he nervously repeated himself to get her to look up at him “I love you” He spoke so quietly that his words were barely above a whisper, declaring that those words were only meant for Y/N to hear.

Y/N’s heart skipped a beat, it was like she could feel fireworks exploding inside of her “I love you” She replied, trying hard to pay attention to his every move so that she could remember this moment forever.

He kissed her again, but this time it was so full of love that nothing else mattered to any of them, even the nerves of his presentation disappeared.

Chris and Annie arrived shortly after and the four of them left for the art show. The art hall was full of artists exploring the big space, stopping from time to time to examine someone else’s art.

Y/N could feel Dalton’s hand sweating against hers, giving it a squeeze and a soft smile to comfort him.

He eventually left them to speak with Armagan and a few other people that were with her, Y/N assumed they were important as most of the art kids seemed to recognise who they were but he would probably be busy for a while, so they decided to explore with everyone else.

“Dalton is so much better than everyone else” Chris whispered as someone explained their painting to a group of students.

“Oh, for sure” Y/N replied proudly.

“Of course you agree with me” She teased.

“Well I’m here to support my boyfriend, so yeah I agree” Chris and Annie rolled their eyes at the same time “What? This is literally your fault, maybe if you had knocked-”

“We get it, and we regret it, trust us”

#dalton lambert #dalton lambert x reader #dalton lambert fic #dalton lambert imagine #dalton lambert x you #dalton lambert fanfic #dalton lambert imagines #dalton lambert fluff #insidious the red door #ty simpkins #insidious 5 #insidious

[dorkfruit]

i put this together using my computer's trackpad so the new year is already starting out . bad .

posts: J | F | M | A | M | J | J | A | S | O | N | D

template

reflections on the year, my plans for the future, some studies i did, and wips for the next year all down below for those who are interested

tldr; we will be ianthing next year so watch out!!

oh dear lord it's been another year. 2024! can you believe it! i don't talk much on this blog because i have a tendency to talk too much, but it's my little new year's treat, so here we go.

RECAP

i started taking drawing "seriously" in December of 2020, starting to do studies and stuff, and each year since i've ramped it up more and more. this year, i did. a lot of studies. there's probably like at least 200 more in my folder now (not including the 300 days worth of gesture drawings i did), with things like painting, faces, feet, poses, etc. anything i was struggling with, i went right into studying it. my art has been mediocre for a pretty long time now, and it's only the past few months where i feel i'm starting to get the hang of it, which is exciting!

more importantly, i started posting a lot more on this blog. i really like documenting my progress, looking on where i was before and seeing how i've improved. everytime i draw some fanart, im like, oooghh i can't wait to show my (: followers (: !! lots of locked tomb art of course. i've been trying to nail the energy of the different characters, which is why i enjoy books so much, because you get a lot of creative control. drawing ianthe is my fav of course, cause she's my lil nasty, but also i enjoyed doing designs for characters i hadnt thought about before, like judith.

in addition to the locked tomb, we had some new fandoms that got brief moments in between iantheposting: Fear and Hunger, Postal, Faith The Unholy Trinity, and a couple of old ones too, like We Have Always Lived In The Castle and The Merciless.

i posted about 115 times this year, although most of those are shitposts LOL i love posting stuff on my blog and showing people my stuff <3

THE FUTURE

my plans? do more ianthe art, of course. ill be working on more studies, probably going to work on developing a style, and figuring out how to paint. i'd like to do more actually finished pieces, but let's be honest, it'll still be mostly shitpost doodles. i'd like to do more weird stuff. i've been messing around with some gore and NSFW near the end of the year, and it's fun to draw for me. i like idk art that evokes some type of emotion, especially discomfort, and so i find that type of art fun to do, so if you don't enjoy what i've done thus far in that direction, perhaps this isn't the blog for you. i really like horror media, and so i want to do some stuff like that too.

for specifics, i like western type art, a comic book-esque style i'd like to aim for. but i'd like it to be a little more. weird with it. i find comic books often draw all the characters the same, and make all the characters traditionally attractive, and that's boring to me so i'll have to work on finding a way to keep things weird, while also appealing in a graphic sense. the worst thing my art could be is bland and forgettable.

locked tomb wise... more tridentarii art. need to be really weird with it. i have lots of wips planned, like i have a whole page worth of just thumbnails, so i wanna get some of those done. also i had a few animatics i wanted to do. mostly stupid shit, once i learn how to do animatics, then we'll do actual serious ones. id also like to do more comics. i have some comics storyboarded out with my girlies, i like telling a story so, need practice on that. id also like to develop a way to consistently draw them, for convenience sakes, so i'm not fighting for my life every single time i draw these characters. oh and i wanna do some outfit stuff. i draw them in like. generic clothes everytime but i'd like to come up with a few actual outfit designs, that i can just reference back to. and, of course, more shitposts. lots of stupid shit in 2024 for sure. there was something else i wanted to say here but i can't remember.

ART

oki enough rambling, here's some IMAGES for yall to look at i know everyone loves to look at images.

began this year by warming up with gesture sketches (almost) every day. i started with 20 poses (30 seconds each), and then in november i was like. ugh my hands suck i need to get better at hands, so i switched to doing 10 hand sketches (60 seconds each). i want my art to be very energetic so it's important that i do these !!

anatomy studies of extremities because i'm flopping at those -_- ive gotten better with hands but they're still a struggle. i hate feet tho still

need to get my painting game up. i joined an art forum to get advice, and the biggest suggestion i got was working on my values, so i did various value studies. also lots of faces because my faces flop !!

random doodles to work on drawing from imagination. on my "sketchbook" pages, as i like to call them, i'm usually pretty loose and messy, since the point is just to be drawing so often these will suck, but that's fine. i don't think very much when i draw faces on here either so they end up being in my Instinctive Style i suppose you could say

ianthe wip. i was planning to do a few drawings based on the idea of her having Missing Arm nightmares, but the lineart was intimidating to me so i haven't worked on this one more yet /: also there was going to be a toontown gay homosexual toxic yuri comic that i was gonna put here with it but the page is way too long so umm guess that'll have to wait.

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anyways. thank you for reading if you got to the bottom of this! i appreciate all the support that i've been getting lately (extra big kissies for the same like 5 people who always reblog my posts youre the best). and we will be ianthing soo hard in 2024 so watch out!!

#and god bless. there is not a single background in any of these images. sketch on a white bg foreverz!! #my art #art meme #ianthe tridentarius #really got to tag her here bc . all this art is of her LOL