Tumgik
#(like. I go through phases every month and I know it's coming. but I also know it'll go away again eventually)
loumauve · 1 year
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#sometimes I wish there was like a guide or sth to dealing with intimacy when you're ace#not just in relationships but also in relationships#bc sometimes I think back to conversations I've had with non-ace folks in the past#and usually they would come down to sth like 'when you know you know'#or 'there's gonna be this look and you'll know it's the right moment'#which all seems fake af and untrue and entirely un-applicable if you've agreed to sth else#like.. if you've agreed to not worry abt that and that you'll pick up the topic if anything ever changes#but how do you know if things have changed. how do you know what you want vs what you're wanting only in the moment#and how do you not make it awkward if you bring it up only to later realise maybe you were just having a weird moment#(like. I go through phases every month and I know it's coming. but I also know it'll go away again eventually)#(and like.. I guess I'm still terrified of setting expectations for things I can later not fulfill)#(and sure that's prob due to fucked up shit that happened in past relationships and this is not the same)#((..the difference a partner you can trust to keep their word on respecting your boundaries can make...))#anyway. scared shitless of starting sth I can't finish. also unsure if I want to start anything in the first place#and just so tired of not knowing where to even fucking start. gonna blame my migraine weirdness for posting this in the first place#a day in the life of..#(((how to know if maybe you'd like something now when you haven't in the past but now all parameters are different..#..and maybe it would be nice but maybe it would still suck and you'd end up hating it and feeling regretful..#..and maybe you'll never be able to get out of your head enough to just have a moment and go with it and be happy)))
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angelltheninth · 1 month
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5 and/or 11 from the recent writing prompt list for gojo, please, if you don't mind? 👀
You know I don't mind writing for my bae Gojo.
Pairing: Gojo Satoru x Fem!Reader
Tags: nsfw, smut, established relationship, grinding, clothed sex, making out, reunion kiss, flirting
Word count: 0.6k
A/N: Bit of angst here but nothing too bad, mostly smut.
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11. Hands desperately clutching at one another, gasping into each other’s mouths as if you were starved of one another.
Almost a month. That's how long you and Gojo has been apart. You ran through the hall frantically, rushing to open that door and fall into his arms. More like crash against him this time but that didn't matter nearly as much as kissing him.
You pulled each other close, his hands scrambling to lock the door as best as he could with him being so occupied. After a few failed attempts he succeeded, following it up with grabbing your thighs and helping you wrap them around his lower back.
This freed his hands to travel across your body, groping and squeezing your breasts through your clothes, reaching back to your ass and guiding it down to grind against his pulsing bulge.
"Gojo, missed you." You moaned into his mouth, barely getting a word in between your tongues fighting for dominance. "I need you so bad right now."
"I missed you too babe. Felt like I was gonna go crazy without you there." It was a hard decision to split you two for missions but it was made after you got into way too many distractions which resulted in you nearly losing track of the demon. You were a new couple, very much in your horny honeymoon phase. Just so happened that you were also a very strong duo. Taking you off this mission made it take longer. "Shit. I won't last long. I couldn't touch myself for the whole week, my cock's about to fucking explode if I don't get all this cum out."
Gojo rarely complained like this, mostly because you had a very active sex life. Neither of you went neglected, all your needs met. "Come for me then." You grunted against his lips while rolling your hips and grabbing at his belt. Undoing his pants provided him some relief but it wasn't enough, it only made the stickiness between your thighs harder to ignore.
Neither of you had the self control to say quiet about your make out session, moaning and gasping into each other's mouth while Gojo's hips pick up speed, his cock now fully straining in his pants and leaving a dark spot on them.
"'Bout to come. Watch me come for you." Gojo moved you against the wall where you could lean back and enjoy the show he was putting on. His hands pushed your skirt up, smirking at how wet your underwear was. "Close too?"
You didn't trust your words so you nodded quickly, grabbing at the roots of his hair and pulling him close, lips so close but not touching, feeling each other getting closer to your inevitable release. Gojo let out one last strained groan as his cum dirtied his boxers, and moments later your hand as you stroked the last of his cum onto your hand.
He watched as that same hand pushed past your underwear and you rolled your hips against it, spreading the cum around your pussy and clit until your body shook against his. Gojo pulled you close, holding you through your high, "We have to make them let us go on missions again. This will drive me mad, I can't keep edging like this every time."
"I don't know, you get pretty wild when you're on edge." Your sadistic smile caused his cock to twitch again but his face was far from happy. "Oh relax! I'm kidding. I want to go on more missions with you too. But I don't think two new Sorcerer's will change anyone's mind."
That was the sad truth of your current position. After you got more field experience the decision might change. For now at least you'd have to learn to keep your hands to yourselves. It might be good for you to have some time apart if this frantic make out and dry humping session was any indication.
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chalametluvrz · 1 month
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dating timothee chalamet
timothee x afab!reader (mainly gn! expect on nsfw bits)
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towards the start of the relationship, i think he'd be pretty anxious
he'd often find himself messing around with his hands a lot on dates
or stumbling over his words a little too much with a small giggle
if you've ever seen old interviews of him when he was younger. you know the ones where he gets all shy and giggly? that's exactly how i envision him to be with you
after some time, that's slowly replaced with his hyperactive ass
and let me tell you, boy never shuts the fuck up that's not a bad thing
because of his schedule, he rarely gets to see you in person
so whenever he does, he just has so much to tell you and so much to talk about that he just ends up coming out with a cluster-fuck of words
he always tries to facetime you at least a couple times a week
and let me tell you, the call will always start with him saying 'oh, i missed your pretty face' or 'seeing you has made my day'
boy is madly in love
and even though he hasn't said it yet, it's fairly obvious he's not hiding anything
he's the kind of person to want to keep your relationship on the down low
because if you're also famous, he wouldn't want to cause any issues or drama through tabloids
and if you aren't, he'd feel awful dragging you into the world of hollywood
eventually though, as most celeb relationships do, you got found out
someone caught you out on your 6 months anniversary
and that was it; twitter was going mental
timothee soon figured out that he probably had to say something
but honestly, he was kind of relieved he didn't have to hide you anymore
the morning you two woke up and saw yourselves going viral on twitter, there was a bit of a mad scramble between the two of you
before eventually, timothee chilled out
'but now i don't need to hide we're together, anymore. i can let the world know you're mine.' he'd say to your confusion at his relaxed state
cute but also now all of timmy's fans are stalking your instagram
cooking meals together!!!
i have a feeling timothee's love languages are more tailored towards physical touch and acts of service tell me im wrong
so cooking together is such a beautiful thing for him
as much as timothee loves taking you out, i think he'd much prefer to cook a fancy pasta dish together with wine over that any day
he also strikes me as a cosy movie date guy
but honestly, it more than likely turns into something else
don't fight me on his, he's a horny guy
like bro would get a hard-on just snuggling with you
when you first started dating, he'd get all shy about it
he'd apologise frantically and his face would be redder than ever
after dating for some time, he'd be less phased
unless you showed and expressed discomfort with it of course
after the shock of you dating slowly weaved out of the fans
timothee would definitely start posting you on his instagram
he just needed the world to know how obsessed he is with you
arguments are rare
extremely rare
they usually only happen when timothee is stressed
feelings get heated and you end up making some snippy comments at each other before one of you gets up and leaves the room
after you've both had time to cool down, you're both mature enough to talk it out and apologise for whatever each of you or one of you has done
communication is a big thing for timmy, so i think arguments are heavily avoided because he encourages you to come to him about anything
any concerns, rants and problems you have, he wants to know
he's a flirter, let me tell you that thankfully not with others
always dazzling you with compliments
you're in the crowd at a press tour? he's staring, smirking and winking at you the whole time
you're supporting him whilst he's on set? the man can't take his eyes off you and is coming to hold you the second the shot is taken
you're on facetime? every odd sentence is him saying some suggestive comment or simply how stunning you are
the man cannot get enough of you
going back to the horny thing...
he has a high sex drive
there's absolutely no doubt about it
he is a giver!!! the man aims to please!!!
could eat you out for days
i've already made a headcanon about him eating you out so i will be brief BUT!!!
he's messy!!! the wetter the better!!!
will overstimulate you with hid tongue any day
and then make sure you cum on his cock as well
you know what they say about tall, skinny boys? wink wink
i'd say he's a good 7 inches, 7 1/2 at a push
he knows how to please you, and he's eager to learn what makes you tick
even though he's mainly a dom, i can see him being a sub at times
only on rare assurances though
being his date to things like the met gala, oscars etc
after being open about your relationship, he couldn't wait to take you everywhere and anywhere with him
loves it when you wear his clothes
but i feel like all boys do?
especially when he's away, opening up a facetime call to see you sat there in one of his t-shirts. he actually thinks his heart might implode.
this boy will actually love you with his whole heart
the cutest, softest and proudest boyfriend around fr
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rafesfavgirl · 12 days
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gurl i neeed a part 2 of stop asking me to stay, that broke me😭😭😭
you ask, i deliver :) hope you like it!!
i don't regret a thing — r. cameron
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part 1.
❝ we're not the only ones,  i don't regret a thing every word i've said, you know i'll always mean ❞
pairing: ex-bf!rafe x fem!reader
context: you and rafe have been dating for seven months, and while the relationship started it out well, as soon as the honeymoon phase ended (about 3 months in), everything went to shit. you've been trying to put up with it, knowing the situation with ward, but tonight, you realize you've had enough.
words: 2.4k+
warnings: swearing, toxic relationship, mentions of drug use, mainly fluff, a little angst, might still make you cry. rafe being an absolute simp for you, basically.
rafe wakes up the next morning, faced-down on topper's living room couch with almost no recollection of what happened the night before. except one thing—you'd finally walked away from him.
"not enough to choose me. you give in every time." your words echo in his head, as he opens his eyes.
fuck. what did he do?
"good morning sunshine," kelce comes down the stairs and greets rafe, who looked as if he couldn't move from the couch. "you sleep well?"
"i slept like shit," rafe groans, finally sitting himself up. "what the hell happened last night?"
"you mean other than you getting coked out and royally screwing things over with y/n?" kelce sasses him. "not much bro."
rafe shoots him a glare. "i did not royally screw things over with y/n."
"are you sure about that?" kelce raises a brow at him. "cause i had to drive her home last night crying, bro."
rafe's ear perk up at kelce's confession of you crying over him. you wouldn't have. you were the one who broke up with him.
"she was crying?" rafe asks.
"do you seriously even have to ask?" kelce replies. "i can't even count on two hands how many times you've made her cry the last few months."
no, that couldn't be true. surely he hadn't made you cry that often.
"shut the fuck up kelce," rafe gets up from the couch in complete denial of how shitty he's treated you the last few months and makes his way over to the kitchen.
rafe opens the fridge and grabs a bottle of water, while kelce joins him in the kitchen.
"you know it's true," kelce says, leaning back against the counter and crossing his arms. "you just never see it, because she won't let you."
was he right?
"you know how y/n is, bro," kelce adds, as i take a sip of water. "she'll never let you know you're hurting her, because you fear nothing more than being the cause of her pain and losing her. but she's also not going to beg and cry for you to stay and fight for her."
i did know that. that's what i loved about her. she didn't necessarily play hard to get when i tried asking her out on a date after months of texting, but she didn't give in too easily either. she wanted me to prove i was serious about her before giving me a real chance. she knew her worth.
i recap the bottle i'm drinking from and set it down on the counter beside me, my eyes focused on kelce. "so what should i do?"
kelce holds his hands up. "if you don't know by now, i can't help you."
rafe wasn't an idiot. he knew what he had to do.
so, after going home and taking a shower to freshen up and get a change of clothes, he drove to the flower shop in town to get you a bouquet of lavender and baby's breath, then nothing bundt cakes to get your favorite treat—a white chocolate raspberry bundt cake—and finally, your house.
once he parked his truck in front of your house and got out, he went through his usual routine of rounding around to your backyard, where he moved the ladder the gardeners used towards your bedroom window.
he climbed up and knocked, balancing the flowers and bundt cake in one hand.
you were sitting in bed watching after we fell on your laptop with a box of tissues beside you and puffy, red eyes when you hear the knock on your window.
without even thinking about it, you already knew who it was. this was just what he did. and against your better judgment, you got up from your bed, and walked over to pull the curtains open and find rafe outside with a regretful look on his face, a bouquet of flowers and a small box of your favorite treat.
slowly, but surely, you unlock the window and pull it up.
"i'm sorry," he speaks before you can, and you scoff.
"you know, i'm getting real sick of hearing you say that," you reply, turning around to walk away and reposition yourself back on your bed, while he slips in through your window.
"i got you flowers," he offers you a small smile and holds both items out to you. "and your favorite bundt cake. white chocolate raspberry."
your eyes shift from the gifts in his hand to his piercing blue eyes. they were no longer dark like they were last night, but there was a sense of uncertainty in them. like he wasn't sure he could win you back.
"so what? am i suppose to just forgive you? just like that?" you retort.
he lets out a sigh, and takes a seat at the edge of your bed, placing both items down on your bed next to your box of tissues. he finally gets a good look at you—from the messy bun on your head, to the bags under your eyes from barely getting any sleep last night, to your red, puffy eyes—and realizes just how badly he's messed up this time.
"i should've just fucked all those other girls. at least they know how to have fun." he still couldn't believe he said those words to you last night.
"i don't deserve your forgiveness," he admits. "i know that. but i want it, y/n. and i'm willing to work for it."
while those words were music to your ears, you were apprehensive. he apologizes every time. and while things do change for a while, they're never permanent. and a week or two from now, you'd be back in this same situation again. was that really worth it?
"i know i don't deserve any more chances," he continues, his eyes only focused on yours. "but i promise… i promise just give me one more and you won't regret it."
your eyes shift between his. he looked a little… scared? was he really that afraid to lose you?
"i don't know, rafe," you say honestly, shifting a little. "you've hurt me so bad… i don't know if i can take you doing it one more time."
"i'm not going to," he immediately shakes his head and reaches out to take your hands in his, fiddling with your fingers and glancing down at them. "please, baby, please. just let me show you i'm the guy for you. that i can be the guy you need and want me to be."
"how?"
"you'll give me a chance?" he asks, his eyes lighting up at the idea of being given another chance to win you back. 
despite your brain screaming at you not to, your heart wins over and you nod. you couldn't help it. every part of you yearned for him. and if he was willing to show you that he really could be the guy you knew he was—the guy you fell in love with—then maybe it would be worth it.
"wear something nice," he says. "i'll come back to pick you up at seven."
at exactly seven on the dot, you hear rafe park his car in front of your house, and look out your bedroom window to see him dressed in skinny black slacks and a long sleeve, white button down carrying a bouquet of red roses as he walked towards your driveway and front door.
you can't help the small smile that forms on your face as you hurry to strap your heels on and look at yourself in the mirror one more time, before grabbing your purse off your vanity and heading down the stairs.
"where are you heading off to?" your mom asks when you pass by the living room, all dressed up.
"date with rafe," you reply, walking towards the front door.
your parents had never been rafe's biggest fan—they weren't exactly unaware of how often he's made you cry the last couple of months—but they also knew they couldn't stop you from dating whoever you wanted, so they never fought you on it, and you were grateful for that. it was comforting to know they'd support you no matter what happened.
taking a deep breath, you place your hand on the doorknob, and finally open the door when the bell rings.
rafe's eyes instantly widen at the sight of you, his eyes trailing down your body wrapped in a tight, short, satin red dress. "wow," he gasps. "you- you look…"
your cheeks redden at his loss of words. "you don't clean up too bad yourself, cameron."
he smiles at your use of his last name as a nickname, and holds the red roses in his hand out to you. "these are for you."
"you already got me flowers this morning, you know," you joke, taking the bouquet from him. your mom was gonna be pleased to know rafe was back to filling up all her flower vases.
"i know, but…" he trails off. "you deserve the best."
the blush on your cheeks deepen at his words. "give me a second," you turn to walk back towards the living room, and set the bouquet down on the coffee table in front of your parents. "don't wait up."
they don't even get a word in before you're walking away again to join rafe outside.
"shall we?" you ask, looking up at him through your lashes, as you closed the door behind you.
"just… one more thing," a sly smile comes across his lips, as he reaches into his back pocket to pull out a black blindfold.
you stare at it, your mouth agape. "you're kidding, right?"
he shrugs, "i want it to be a surprise."
you groan, but give in anyway. "fine. but if i trip in these heels because i can't see where i'm going, consider us broken up for good."
he laughs at the threat, even though a part of him was afraid you still wouldn't forgive him after tonight. "you know i won't let that happen. turn around."
you do as he says, and he ties the blindfold around your eyes, before taking your hand in his and leading you down the driveway towards his car parked up on the curb. he opens the door for you, and carefully helps you into the passenger seat, before closing the door and rounding the car to get in the driver's seat.
the second the engine comes on, your romantic taylor swift playlist plays through the car's speakers.
"you didn't," you say. he would always complain when you had aux because she was all you'd ever play.
"i guess she's not too bad," rafe shrugs, chuckling as you began singing along to the lyrics of wildest dreams.
rafe continued driving through the island for another ten or fifteen minutes, before he finally pulled the car to a stop in front of his family's beach house on the edge of figure eight, completely secluded from everything else.
he gets out of the car first, and helps you out, taking your hand in his to lead you through the house and out to the back porch.
"are you ready?" he leans in towards your ear, and goosebumps rise along your skin at his proximity.
you nod, and he reaches his hands up to the back of your head to untie the blindfold.
it takes a little while for your eyes to adjust, but once they do, a feeling of warmness fills your heart at the sight in front of you.
red rose petals were scattered in the sand of the private beach, along with fairy lights, a candlelit table for two set up in the center of it all, as acoustic instrumentals of taylor's best love songs played through the speaker situated on the porch.
"you like it?" he asked.
you turn your head to look at him. "rafe, i… it's perfect."
"that's what i was going for," he shrugs smugly, and nods his head towards the set up. "come on."
you both remove your shoes, before he takes your hand in his again and leads you down the back porch to the table in the middle of the beach.
"i can't believe you did this for me," you say, as he pulls a chair out for you to sit in.
"i'd do anything for you," he smiles, taking the seat across from you once you're seated.
after a three course dinner and a bottle of wine, which was all served to the both of you by a waiter that rafe hired from the country club, the night slowly came to an end, an endless amount of stars filling the night sky above you.
but while you were focused on the stars, rafe was focused on you.
"god, you're beautiful," he says, causing you to look at him now.
you chuckle, "shut up."
"no, i'm fucking serious," he replied, standing up from his seat.
you watched him carefully as he walked over to you, and held a hand out.
you glance at his hand and tilt your head up at him, "what are you doing?"
"dance with me," he says.
"you're asking me to dance?" you raise a brow at him.
"mhm," he nods. "you gonna say yes?"
"well how can i say no?" you reply, a small smile forming on your lips as you put your hand in his.
he leads you a few feet away from the table, and rests a firm hand on your waist, as you trail a hand up to his shoulder.
he locks his eyes with yours as you both begin swaying to taylor's timeless, and scans your face.
"what?"
he shakes his head, "i don't deserve you..."
"rafe…"
"but i'm gonna do everything i can to make sure i become the kind of guy who does," he cuts me off. "i want to be better, y/n. not only for you, but for myself too."
you smile, and pull him closer, your hand snaking to the back of his head.
"i'm sorry for being such an ass the last few months," he says, and you close my eyes, taking the moment in as he continues. "i know i haven't deserved all the chances you've given me, but i'm not gonna disappoint you again. i want to be the guy you think i am."
you pull away, just enough to have your eyes lock with his.
"you are that guy, rafe," you tell him, and you mean it. "you just need to let him show more."
he smiles, "you're pretty damn amazing, you know that?"
"so i've been told," you shrug jokingly.
he chuckles. "i love you, y/n."
"i love you too."
reblogs and comments are deeply appreciated <33
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indecisive-capricorn · 2 months
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Headcanons to Miguel O'Hara x Pregnant Reader:
WARNINGS: There will be a bit of angst, grief, mentions of child loss, but loads of fluff.
SUMMARY: Getting pregnant is one thing, but how will your beloved partner, Miguel O'Hara, react to it when he finds out? And how will he be like throughout your pregnancy?
AUTHOR'S NOTE: I have been noticing that for the last few months, the Miguel O'Hara imagines are decreasing and I am still very high in my reader phase for him, so in an attempt to feed my fellow still on high Miguel O'Hara lovers, I'll be posting several imagines or headcanons for him. Apologies if it's a little rough, been some time since I made a headcanon.
MASTERLIST: Feel free to check out my other works! :)
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When you first found out you were pregnant, you were quite unsure what to do. It wasn't as if you were afraid that Miguel might abandon you or anything, but because of what had happened with Gabriella, you knew children was a very sensitive topic for him.
You had talked with Miguel in the past about children and he considered the possibility of having children with you in the future but he didn't feel as if he was ready for kids yet. He was still grieving over Gabriella and you didn't blame him. She was his kid and no parent should ever have to endure the feeling of losing their child, but he has to and it was a scar that he would bring along with him throughout his life.
That was the reason why you are quite nervous to tell Miguel the news and you actually tried to keep it hidden from him for some time. You managed to do a good job at it but it also made you accidentally distant yourself from Miguel too.
Miguel was quick to catch on that something was wrong. Look, you can be the greatest liar in the world and he will still manage to find out your deepest secrets without needing you to tell him any of them. But even before you distant yourself from him, Miguel was able to sense the changes your body was going through. He wasn't precisely sure what it was but he knew something was different and you could blame it on his spider senses for giving him the ability to know that.
Miguel thought you were on your period at first and needed space, but he grew suspicious when your behaviour still had't changed after a few weeks.
And that was when he decided to confront you about your behaviour. He missed your light touches, your cuddles and your daily kisses, especially the cheek kisses you usually give him every morning before going to work or before going on a long mission. He missed pulling you into his arms while sleeping in bed with you, only to have you scooting to the far side of the bed the last few weeks. He missed you so much and he was hurt by your actions as well.
Even with how nervous you were, you didn't want to hide the truth from Miguel any longer, so you told him about your pregnancy.
Shock was an absolute understandment to describe Miguel's reaction to the news. Like, all the signs of your pregnancy the past few weeks came up to him in large capital letters. He should've known from it all but then again, even if you were already displaying a small baby bump, Miguel would only believe it once you actually said it to him.
Miguel would be happy next and he'll be kissing your cheek. He'll say that it is a wonderful news and would ask you for more details about the pregnancy and the baby's health. He'll be quite joyful about it but you knew that there was more to it than that.
You knew your partner better than anyone in the multi-verse and you knew for a fact that while Miguel was more than happy and excited about the news, you also knew that Miguel felt very scared. He was scared that he might fail to protect you and the baby the same way he failed to protect Gabriella. He would swear to you on that day that no harm would ever come to you or the baby as long as he's alive, but it still didn't vanish the fear inside him.
It is something Miguel can't control. Ever since Gabriella died, Miguel had closed off almost everyone in order to protect himself from losing more loved ones. It changed when he met you. You had slowly but surely began to tear down his walls, and encourage him to fight his fears.
His fears continues to stay in him, but you are always there to assure and remind him that you and the baby will be with him for a very, very long time.
After he has gotten over his initial worries and fears, Miguel will be celebrating the news with you. It could be going to your favourite restaurant for dinner or even something as simple as going to the park for a walk and get ice cream. It didn't matter how they celebrate it as long as his beautiful baby mama is happy.
Miguel is the type of person who reads every pregnancy book he can get his hands on. He'll also be taking notes of every word the doctor says during your pregnancy and Miguel will be the one to ask the doctor lots of questions in each appointment. The doctor might think you love to chat and talk about the baby but boy, Miguel could be bringing a whole damn book filled with questions about the baby and your pregnancy, and that wouldn't even be enough to stop him from asking. Miguel is actually tempted to get a personal doctor for you. The guy is filthy rich after all, but you protested against the idea and he decided not to. Of course, he'll secretly have a personal doctor in his contacts and if you ever found out about it, he'll just say it's a precaution.
Speaking of being filthy rich, when it comes to buying things for you and the baby, there is no budget. Before you were pregnant, you still somehow managed to convince him to give a limit when it comes to spending his money, but after he finds out you're pregnant? Yeah no, Miguel will be spending a shit ton of money because it's the love of his life and the mother of his child we're talking about here! He's not paying attention to the price tags, just paying attention to the quality because Miguel only wants the best of the best for his family.
One of the things Miguel knows is really important is quality time and throughout your pregnancy, he tries to be less at work. Miguel can't be out of work completely since the multi-verse needs him, but he can find people to cover his work while he's away to spend time with you.
Miguel is overprotective of you. He has always been protective and perhaps a tad possessive before, especially when there are other guys around, but he is much more protective when you're pregnant. Miguel knows you're not fragile. Hell, he worked with Jessica while she was heavily pregnant and she could have still easily beaten his ass. But there's this instinct that keeps on urging him to just be on guard all the time and because of it, Miguel is always on guard, unless you two are at home alone together.
Miguel adores your growing baby bump. It could still be a small one and Miguel would already be in love with it. He is always touching your stomach, either caressing it gently or leaving several kisses, and this continues on as it grows over time. Miguel's eyes will shine brightly whenever he feels the baby kick.
With that being said, every wish you make is Miguel's command. He will do anything and everything to make you as comfortable and relaxed as you can be. Swollen feets? Miguel's there to massage them. Late night cravings? Miguel's already on the way to the grocery store to buy the ingredients. Suddenly bursting into tears because of your hormones? Miguel's immediately there to comfort you.
Miguel doesn't usually like to take pictures but he tries to take some pictures of you throughout your pregnancy and put them all in a single photo album. He'll also put in the pictures that he had kept of each ultrasound appointment into the album. He does this so that one day when the baby is finally born and has grown much older, Miguel wants to be able to remember all the times of your pregnancy. The photo album is definitely one of his most cherished things and he'll be adding more pictures to it once the baby is born.
Overall, Miguel will be a little scared at first but he will always be very supportive of you throughout your pregnancy and try to be the best partner he can be to you and be the best father to your baby.
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ohtobeleah · 1 year
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An Angel’s Discretion //
Summary: When Bradley gets a call to say you’ve been involved in a major car accident, his whole world is turned upside down.
Warnings: Bradley Bradshaw x wifeF!reader. Car Accident. Pregnancy, Bradley in a state of existential crisis. Pre-mature birth. Hurt/comfort. Goose cameo.
Word Count: 3.5k
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It felt like time stood still yet had sped up all at the same time. Your entire world had been flipped on its head in the blink of an eye—you felt like your entire life was flashing before your eyes. A Rolodex of memories played out before you as you spun out and rolled down into the embankment. You didn’t know exactly how it happened or why it happened - but regardless of that, it still very much happened and you were still very much in trouble. 
It had been god awful weather recently, so much so the Dagger’s had been grounded for the better half of a week. Bradley had been home for a change, pottering around the house baby proofing sharp edges and making sure the crib was set up just like the instruction book had said. 
It seemed that people truly believed that the car you were trapped in for nearly half an hour had flipped and rolled hours ago. An empty mangled car on the side of the road—nobody stopped to see if there were any occupants. Nobody stopped to snoop. Nobody heard your cries— the cries of a woman in unimaginable pain. Hoping, praying, as you remained helplessly tangled in your seat belt. You had blood gushing from wounds you didn’t know what exactly had been caused by and had bones that shattered from impact. 
You stayed there, trapped in a mess of broken glass and twisted aluminum, whimpering as you rubbed your swollen belly. Seven months. Seven beautiful months carrying your child. Bradley’s daughter. You’d spent seven months promising to keep her safe - keep her sound. You didn’t know the gender but the feeling was there and it was strong, you were having a little baby girl. 
Bradley wanted to keep the gender a surprise, but you knew deep down with every fibre of your being that you were having a girl, that he’d be a girl dad till his dying day. But as you slowly brought your hand up to cup over your bellybutton? You knew something was utterly wrong.
“We’re okay, aren’t we spud.” You mumbled as your vision blurred and your head became far too heavy for you to keep it lifted. “Mama’s gonna take ca-care of you.” You struggled out before succumbing to the feeling of emptiness as you drifted into unconsciousness—the sound of your shattered phone playing your doting husband's ringtone. Replay by iyaz. One final smile appeared on your bloodied broken face as you heard the all too familiar sound. 
Before.....nothing. 
***~***~***~***~***~***~***~
“Baby seats shouldn’t be this complicated to fit!” Bradley groaned as he tried to figure out how to secure the baby seat into the backseat of the Bronco. Jake was too busy trying to reread the instructions. “Nope, I can’t do this right now I need a break.” The pair of naval aviators had been off work for the better half of the week and while you were out grocery shopping, Jake had come over to lend a helping hand at putting together some flat pack furniture. “Good thing this baby isn’t coming for another few months.” 
“Ah, you’ve jinxed it now!” Jake teased, clicking his fingers at Bradley to grab his attention. “Also, apparently it’s meant to face the other way round.” Jake grinned ear to ear as Bradley deadpanned him. Giving up in entirety before he turned back to the house with a huff. “Oh come on! Where are you going, Rooster! we almost had it!” Jake laughed, jogging after his wingman up to the house. 
“I need a beer!” It had been a long afternoon for the two men who had done nothing but unpack and organise the nursery. Bradley was in his own nesting phase. He’d read in a bunch of parents books that nesting was something you’d go through in preparation for the little spud on the way. He was now finding that he was doing it too. 
“Oh I’ll take one too.” Jake trailed behind Rooster into the kitchen. “Job well done deserves a bevy.” Just as Bradley opened the fridge and passed Jake the Budweiser, his phone began to ring out on the kitchen counter. “Oh—unknown number man.” Jake announced. 
“It’s probably Y/n.” Bradley twirled his wedding band as he stood to answer his phone that was sitting on the kitchen bench, not recognising the number lighting up his screen. For a moment he wasn’t going to answer because why would you be calling from an unknown number. But he just had a gut feeling. He’d called you a few times before hand but you never answered, maybe this was you calling him back? 
“Hello?”
“Hello? Is this Lieutenant Bradley Bradshaw?” A woman who sounded more panicked than calm spoke—needing a confirmation before continuing with her call. 
“This is he?” Bradley responded, turning back to Jake with a confused look on his face, eyes glancing up at the time. Five thirty in the afternoon. You should have been home an hour ago. 
“Lieutenant Bradshaw, we’ve just had a one Y/n Bradshaw admitted.” The woman on the other end of the phone call Bradley almost didn’t answer, explained. “Your wife, she’s unfortunately been involved in a severe accident and—“ Bradley didn’t hear the rest of what the nurse had to say as he dropped his phone, it clunked and clambered from the kitchen bench to the tiled floor below. “Hello? Mr Bradshaw?” Unable to process the news he’d just been told Bradley began to panic as his vision tunnel and his mind went numb. 
“Jake—“ Was it Bradley’s fault? Was he a terrible husband for not noticing how long you’d been gone? Was there something wrong with your car? You’d mentioned a time or two that the air conditioning had been making a funny noise. “Jake I can’t breathe—“ Bradley clutched at his chest as he groaned, it felt like his entire world was collapsing around him. “I can’t fucking breathe.” 
“Oh-okay, yeah we’re leaving right now.” Jake confirmed as he spoke to the lady on the phone. Hangman had picked up the phone Rooster had dropped, he listened to what the woman on the other end of the line had to say as Bradley started to sob, losing his grip on reality. 
Jake reached out to touch Bradley’s shoulder in an attempt to confront the aviator who’s world had just shattered into a million pieces, the moment he did though Jake Seresin witnessed his best friend collapse down to his knees in unimaginable pain at the thought of losing you. His girl. His wife. His best friend. The love of his life. The mother of...oh god the mother of his child. 
“Rooster we gotta g—“
“I can’t lose her!!” Bradley screamed as warm tears drenching his flushed face. “Can’t—won't lose her. I can’t!” Jake knew Bradley was hyperventilating, he’d seen a panic attack a time or two before when Bob had stayed in his spare room while his house was being painted. Jake also knew a panic attack when he saw one because he got them too. But this? This was a panic attack shrouded in heartache, one Jake would never understand. 
“Hey, hey Rooster.” Jake crouched down before his wingman— knowing he needed all the strength he could get. On the inside Jake was a mess. If Bradley lost you that meant Jake lost you too. Holding the back of Bradley’s head as he leaned in. “Listen man, this is so fucked up but she needs you, Y/n needs you to be there for her because she can’t do this alone? Alright? We gotta go— you’re her husband Rooster.” Jake reminded him. “Y/n needs her husband to be there for her okay? In sickness and in health you promised her.” 
Bradkey sobbed uncontrollably—but he got up. Knowing Hangman was right. You needed him, and like fuck was he gonna let you slip through his fingers. 
“Okay, okay let’s go.” 
***~***~***~***~***~***~
It’s needless to say Bradley Bradshaw was a mess—a sobbing, shaking, totally exhausted figment of his former stoic self in the private waiting room nurses had told him to wait in. Jake contacted your mum and dad, he called Mav and Penny too who were already on their way over to the Miramar Base Hospital because hell was Mav somewhat sob going to go through this alone. 
“We don’t know what’s going on.” Bradley could just faintly hear Jake on the phone with Phoenix as he sat and twisted his wedding band around his ring finger. It kept him grounded but the tangible reminder of your love did nothing to stop Rooster's mind from thinking of the very worst. 
“We haven’t been told a single thing—“ Jake sighed as he ran his hand through his sun kissed hair locks. “No, no he’s not in a good way.” 
Bradley could hear only Jake's voice and only his answers. But he knew Phoenix would be going stir crazy not know what had happened or what was going on, they all would be. Every single member of Bradley’s naval squadron had become like family to you both. Extensions on the small albeit perfect family you were just starting. 
Bradley thought he knew heartbreak, thought he’d been through pain. He’d lost his dad when he was just shy of three years old and his mother just after his seventh birthday. But nothing—nothing, compared to the heartache of not knowing what was happening to you. If you were alive, if your baby was okay? If Rooster had just lost his young family before it had a chance to grow old. 
“Lieutenant Bradshaw?” An older looking woman in scrubs asked as she knocked. Both Bradley and Jake looked up—both just as desperate for answers. “Hi” She cooed. “My names Jannette, I’ve been with your wife since she came in—“
“H-how is she?” Bradley could barely speak at this point, he was too afraid to know but needed answers. Although he’d stood from the chair he’d been perched in he still twirled his wedding band around his finger. He still needed that tangible reminder. You loved him, no matter what the outcome was you would always love him. To the moon and back and twice over you’d say before he left for deployments. 
In all Bradley’s years he always thought he’d be the one leaving you behind—he never once thought his wife that cut and arranged flowers for a living would leave him, the naval aviator who flew super hornets for a living. But here he stood in some twisted parallel universe that felt like a plot ripped straight from an episode of the twilight zone. 
“She’s critical, my colleagues are still working on her as we speak.” The room went silent as Bradley forgot how to breathe. Jake was by his side in seconds. “It's touch and go.” 
“My baby? How’s my baby?” If anything mattered to you, it was your unborn child. Bradley knew if anything happened to them that you'd never forgive yourself. You’d rather die than live a life without your baby. You’d done everything in your power to make sure they had the best chance of being strong and healthy and safe. You’d been the perfect mother. 
“She” The nurse smiled. “Is okay, we did however have to do an emergency c-section because your wife was unfortunately not able to carry her to full turn due to her uterus filling with blood.” It was a whirlwind of emotions. Bradley Bradshaw was suddenly a father, he had a baby girl. 
“Rooster, you have a little girl.” Jake helped Bradley take a few agonising steps as he took in the news. You’d given him a baby girl. A tiny little you. How could he ever thank you enough? How could he ever begin to repay that debt of gratitude, of love? 
“You can see her if you’d like? She’s in the NICU.” Jannette explained. “But you won’t be able to touch her without protection until she’s used to the new environment, premature babies can catch infections and colds despite our best efforts, so it’s best she says in the incubation chamber.”
“C’mon Bradshaw, let's go meet your little girl, yeah? You know Y/n wouldn’t want her left alone.” Jake was right. Bradley could hear everything going on around him but he couldn’t speak. He was still taking all this in. He was a dad, a girl dad. He was the father to your daughter and you weren’t here to see him start this new chapter. 
God it was bittersweet. 
“When will I know how my wife is?” Bradley asked as he followed the nurse he towered over—she had a little waddle that Jake couldn’t help but notice. 
“You’ll be the first to know her updated condition, Lieutenant, but from what I’ve seen so far your wife is one hell of a fighter, not a lot of people in her condition would’ve come out of that alive.”
Braduheld onto that tiny shred of hope, clung to it for dear life as he followed the nurse to meet his baby’s girl—way too early. How do you introduce yourself to a baby? Jake was right beside him. Do you think Jake Seresin would ever let his wingman walk alone through such a tragedy? 
Absolutely not. 
“Bradley, this is your daughter, obviously she doesn’t have a name so we called her Jane as protocol - short for Jane Doe.” The little girl was so incredibly tiny. She was dwarfed by wires and tubes connected all over her tiny body helping her little lungs breathe. Bradley couldn’t distinguish if she looked more like you or him. But fuck he wished she looked like you. He took a seat next to the incubator that held his bundle of joy. The joy he’d been blessed with by you. The joy and light of his world he’d helped create, a blend of you and him. 
“H-hey little one.” Rooster struggled to talk. “I’m your Dadda, your mums in a little bit of a situation right now but I’ve got you yeah?” Tears ran down Bradley’s face as he placed a fingertip against the glass. “I’m not gonna let anything bad happen to you, ever.” 
Rooster always said he’d never love anyone more than he’d love you—but this little girl? God she was already Bradley’s entire fucking world. For a single second he forgot you were in surgery. Watching as your daughter's tiny lips curled into a soft smile of a mere second. Bradley liked to think it was her acknowledging his presents. 
“Bradley?” Jannette interrupted, Bradley had forgotten all sense of time as he sat with his baby girl. “It’s your wife—she’s stable, sleeping but stable. She’s being moved to the ICU for around the clock observation.”
“When can I Uh, when can I see her?” Bradley let out a sob as he thanked the heavens above, his little family was okay—not great, not thriving with heath, but okay. Stable. Jake finally allowed himself to breathe for the first time all night. 
“We can go up there if you like?” Bradley nodded in response—looking over at Jake who already knew what his wingman was about to ask. 
“I’ll stay here, keep her company, go get your girl Rooster.” Jake hugged Bradley as tight as he ever had before. “You’re a dad man, congratulations.” Being the big brother Bradley needed but didn’t have. “I got you brother.”
Bradley didn’t know what to do when he first saw you—he stood at the doorway just staring at the women who had given him everything. So injured, so hurt. And he couldn’t do anything to help ease your pain. Even through all the injuries, tubs and wires, much like the little girl you gave precious life to, you still look beautiful. So gorgeous, so at peace. 
A soft “oh god” escaped Bradley’s mouth as he held back sobs walking towards you. Nurse Jannette giving him the space he so desperately needed with you. Bradley took in the sight before him. His beautiful wife, mother of his daughter, laying so lifeless in a hospital bed. He wished so bad you could be at home with him right now, tangled in the warm sheets, smiling and being your “happy go lucky” self instead of here. He wished so badly he could take you anywhere else in the world. 
Anywhere but here—like this. 
“Hey beautiful.” Bradley whispered. Biting his bottom lip to stop himself from breaking down for what felt like the one hundredth time tonight. “You don’t know it yet but you’re a mama, and dammit baby you’ll be the best fucking mum on earth.” Bradley grabbed the nearby seat and pulled it close. Once his hand was in yours there was no place else Rooster wanted to be then right by your side. Although he wished the two of you could be anywhere else together. 
“You’re gonna be okay baby, maybe not today or next week? But you’ll be okay. I won’t let you be anything but okay.” Bradley mumbled through soft sobs as he took notice of every injury that plagued your body. Every cut, stitch, wrap and blood stained patch that littered the soft and supple skin he loved so much. Bradley especially noticed the gash on your cheek—stitched. 
As Rooster sat with you, he could see your eyelids moving. He knew you were conscious, just sleeping. Heavily medicated, he knew you could hear every word he spoke. But soon Bradley Bradshaw watched in awe as you placed your hand over your stomach. Checking to see if your little spud was alright. When you noticed how small your stomach felt you moaned. 
“My—my baby?” Your eyes weren’t even open yet and you already knew something was terribly wrong. Even if your entire body was in agonising pain you needed to make sure your baby was alright. 
“Hey shh, shh, shh, I got you.” Bradley cooed, his hand gently reaching out to cup your cheek—the side without any noticeable injuries that would bring you discomfort. “She’s alright mama, she’s here a little early but she’s okay—j-just like you yeah.” 
“She?” Your eyes opened slowly at the sound of your husband’s voice—your neck killed as you turned to face him. Giving up quickly. Bradley was quick to notice the wince you let out. 
“She mama, our little girl. Both my girls gave me a pretty big heart attack this afternoon huh? Are you trying to kill me honey?” Bradley smiled. Noticing how you smiled back for a brief moment before the muscles in your cheeks gave up. 
“I’m so sorry” You whispered—eyes closed again as you couldn’t stand the light of the room. “I don’t know what happened— no one came though.” You started to cry. “No one came when I called for help for so long.” Bradley leaning in to place a gentle kiss to your forehead. 
“I’m here, I came, I’m not going anywhere my love.” Rooster sobbed back, sometimes being strong meant crying along with the ones you love. “God I thought I lost you.” 
“He said it wasn’t my time to go.” You sighed, clearly fighting off the urge to fall asleep. So groggy from the medicine that even the thought of being a mother hadn’t truly set in yet—all you cared about was that your baby was safe. She was alive. 
“Who did bub? One of the paramedics?” Bradley asked, a little confused as he pushed hair away from your face and made sure the oxygen tube was sitting just right. 
“He was in the car, said I couldn’t leave you yet, that you’d be lost without me.” You softly grinned while your eyes rested. “Had a moustache just like yours.” 
Bradley sat back in shock as he watched you drift back to sleep. Holding your hand thinking how the universe worked in mysterious ways. Bradley had promised to love you in good times and in bad - through sickness and in health. He’d live in the damn hospital if he had to—anything to be by your side. 
“God I hate it when he does this.” Goose groaned as he watched his son’s name appear on the shattered phone on the floor of your busted up car. “You’re not ready, it’s not your time so why bother even putting your through this crap.” The man spoke as you fell unconscious. “It’s not your time my dear and my son certainly needs you by his side or he’ll go crazy.” You listened, tried to nod, smile, anything to let him know you heard him. “You’ll be alright kid.”
Bradley Bradshaw had his family. He had his daughter, he had you. Going back and forth with Jake from room to room watching as both his girls slept. Both of you were still so unaware of the turmoil Bradley had been through. He nearly lost you. Without you? Bradley would’ve been helpless. 
But someone watching over him knew that as well as he did. A guardian angel not only watched over him....
But over his girls too.
***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~*
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iamthat-iam · 2 months
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"Ego", The Final Boss
Olivia (she prefers to be called Liv) has been on quite the spiritual journey for a couple of years. She was born and raised Catholic, then as a teen she decided to leave the church because it didn't resonate with her. She went through a law of attraction phase, followed by law of assumption, and finally, she found non dualism from a few Twitter and Tumblr accounts.
The message, from what she gathered, was that she needed to fully drop the ego in order to realize her true self/true nature and to experience whatever she wanted. She even read a few books where realized masters have spoken about their own personal journeys of dropping ego and how life is generally more peaceful for them now that they've done so.
Now, Liv is one with a troubled past. She would give anything to become an entirely different person with no childhood trauma, and just a happy life all around. She meditated every single day, practiced "sitting in silence", and tried her hardest to detach from her "ego."
She stopped enjoying her usual hobbies out of fear of identifying too much with the character. She would go out of her way to correct thoughts that she felt were "too related to being the person." Needless to say, her mental health began to go downhill very fast.
One of her best friends, Marcus, decided to check up on her one day through face-time. "Hey sis! How have you been?! Haven't seen you in a while."
"Hey..." Liv answered. "I'm not doing all that great to be honest."
"Yeah I figured that. That's why I reached out to you," Marcus stated. "I'm worried about you. It seems like you barely leave the house. Everytime myself or anyone else tries to make plans with you, you either cancel last minute or come up with some bogus excuse as to why you can't come out."
Liv had to laugh because everything he said was true. "So I'm guessing you didn't believe the story about my pet rabbit dying."
Marcus cackled. "GIRL. I've known you for years and not once have you ever had a pet rabbit. Stop playing."
"Okay let me tell you what's really going on with me," Liv began, "So a few months ago I found this 'spiritual practice' called Non Dualism, and the premise of it is you need to 'let go of ego' in order to realize your true nature as God, or Awareness, whatever you want to call it. Also you get to experience whatever you want."
"So this is the reason why you've stopped enjoying your usual hobbies, and why you've stopped having a social life?" Marcus inquired. "I'm going to be honest here. As your friend, I feel like I owe it to you to tell you the Truth even if it isn't what you want to hear. I don't think that this 'practice' has helped you one bit. Either you have misinterpreted the message, or these people are spreading misinformation. Never at any point should you sacrifice your mental health for the sake of 'becoming enlightened.'"
"I don't know what else to do," Liv started to cry a little. "I just want to become a different person living a life full of happiness, one without trauma and constant reminders of my horrible past. I hate being this broken person!"
"It's okay hun, I totally understand," Marcus consoled her. "I can help you. You remember my family guru right? She hates being called that, but I don't know how else to refer to her. Her name is Sage. My family has gone to her for spiritual advice and healing for years."
"Yes, I remember her! Didn't she help your mom heal her lower back pain?" Liv asked excitedly.
"She sure did. I can give you her number if you want!"
After Liv ended her face-time call with Marcus, he gave her Sage's number. She immediately reached out to her to schedule a day where they can meet up.
- -
One day, Liv arrived at a beautiful park to discover Sage already sitting on one of the benches waiting. "Hi! I don't know if you remember me, I'm Marcus' friend Liv."
"Yes! Hi Liv, it's nice to see you again," Sage reached out and gave Liv a warm hug. "Now what can I help you with?"
Liv sat down next to Sage. "Well, I discovered Non dualism a few months ago, and I'm not sure if I misunderstood the message or not, but I thought you had to let go of ego in order to realize your true nature as awareness. And after you realize this, you can experience whatever you want. So long story short, I stopped enjoying life because I thought I had to do that in order to be enlightened."
Sage hesitated for a moment, and then smiled. "Think about it this way.. if it's true that our true nature is awareness, or God, whatever label you put on it, why would you have to go through these unnecessary steps in order to 'become' it? If that's what you already are in the first place?"
Liv opened her mouth to reply, then closed it again. Maybe Sage had a point.
"Here are my thoughts. If anyone is telling you to 'drop the ego', it's bullshit," Sage chuckled. "The point of Non Dualism is realizing that you were always awareness. You were always the awareness behind everything that seems to appear. The ever-stretching, limitless silence that can take on the form of anything. The ego is just a thought. The idea that you are not already fully realized is also just a thought. In reality, there's no ego or person here to let go of. No person here who needs to become 'fully realized.' Just drop the idea that you are a limited human that has to become something, and you'll be golden."
Liv's jaw dropped to the ground. "You're telling me it was THAT SIMPLE THIS ENTIRE TIME?"
Sage laughed heartily. "Yes it is. Why do you think it took masters like Lester or Sri Nisgardatta months or YEARS to 'realize Self?' because they spent so much time trying to get rid of an ego that doesn't exist!"
Liv let out a sigh of relief. "So there really is nothing to do. I can't believe I exerted all that effort for nothing. I do have one more question, how can I experience whatever I want knowing I'm awareness? I want to be a completely different person with a different past."
"The person you think you are now, and the one you want to be are both illusions. You, as awareness, can 'choose' either one like a costume. Everytime you think about this ideal version of you, you've already experienced it," Sage grinned.
Suddenly a wave of emotions flooded through Liv, a mixture of relief and happiness. She felt the urge to give Sage a tight hug. "Thank you so much for helping me today."
"You're so welcome, sweetie."
Good for Liv, she has finally accepted her omnipotence and freedom to experience anything!
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moongothic · 1 year
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MY BLANKET OF DARKNESS HAS BEEN COMPLETED
✨👁️✨ I AM SO COZY NOW ✨👁️✨
So I started working on this blanket around June of 2022. Got like, maybe half-way through the blanket and then the yarn I needed for the blanket went out of stock at my local yarn shop. Now I didn't know the yarn would be completely unavailable for like 6 months (until the stop closed permanently), so I just kept on waiting, hoping for it to come back in stock-- but it never did, so in January I finally looked online if I could find the yarn elsewhere and I did, I got the yarn I needed, and finished the blanket. So it kinda took me 6 months to make this blanket but also not
What made this blanket a truly exciting and fun project for me is that this has been the first blanket I actually made for myself and designed for myself. Like I've enjoyed every single blanket project I've had so far, but having a blanket that's Just For Me is just. It's nice
I originally planned the granny squares out digitally because I wanted to have a fun pattern of different granny squares, something that wouldn't be too busy looking and was carefully planned, and here's what I came up with
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I had two versions of the square pattern, one with moon phases right in the middle of it and another without them. I do like how the moon version looked and part of me kinda regrets not making that one, but I'm not sure the moons would have really gone well with the eyes... So I did go with the first version
(Sidenote, it's not on the pattern above but I added extra rows of just black squares at the top and bottom of the blanket, so there's two rows of black instead of just one)
(Sidenote 2, although I knew I wanted the blanket to be mostly black from the begining, I wasn't entirely sure what accent color I wanted to use, it really was depending on what colors the shop had available. Like I used yellow as kind of a default color since it worked nice with the stars and eyes, but I could've gone with some other color too. In the end, because I didn't like the color options for the yarn at the shop I ended up going with a yellow anyways) (Also I tested out a reverse color version with the pastel purple and white base and no eyes, just for funsies, it looks kinda neat)
But yeah, that's how the planning of the blanket went.
The blanket is made of 231 squares in total, 11x21 rows. 186 of the squares are plain black, the rest are patterned. The star squares were the worst to make because of how many strands of yarn I had to weave in, 0/10, would not reccommend.
I used the Cedro 100% wool yarn (reccomended hook size 5, 50g=100m), and it took me about 38 balls of yarn to finish the blanket (including crocheting all the squares together and doing a single round of double crochet around the blanket to finish it off)
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This is literally all the yarn I have left from this blanket; one untouched ball of black and three partially used balls.
I gotta admit.
I'm kind of shocked by the size of the blanket. Like I very carefully measured it to make it the exact size to fit my bed, and it fits perfectly. But I'm still kinda shocked how big it is. (Which is why I didn't make the border of the blanket any bigger, even though I could've with the yarn I have)
Also
It's HEAVY
Like, of course it's heavy, it's 100% wool and thick, but MAN I didn't expect it lmao
But that kind of makes it perfect for cold winters especially, it's super warm and the weight makes it cozy- like who needs a weighted blanket when you can have one of these lmao
Now I just need to figure out how to protect the blanket from being covered in my white cat's hair...
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nakaharaass · 10 months
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Losing your virginity with Itachi headcanons
a/n: last month i started watching Shippuden for the first time (I read almost all the manga like ten years ago), and I've fallen again in the Itachi phase I went through back then. Also, English is not my mother tongue, so there might be spelling or grammar mistakes, or weird expressions. Likes and reblogs are appreciated! ♡
Characters: Itachi Uchiha.
Genre: nsfw, a bit fluff.
Warnings: fem!reader, penetration, oral sex (fem receiving). (Tell me if I should add something else).
Wordcount: 1.1k
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You knew each other since you were kids. At first you were friends, but your relationship evolved, and now you’re lovers.
I can’t imagine Itachi having sporadic encounters. I see him as somebody who wants the whole relationship experience. If you want his body, you must accept him as your boyfriend.
That being said, your first time was also his first time.
Up until now, you have made out with each other, but things have never gone any further.
It was you who proposed doing something more. Itachi is very respectful, and he didn’t want to pressure you, so he had never said anything before
In the middle of your make out session, you wanted to do more, and he eagerly agreed.
Itachi keeps things simple on your first time: missionary style in a bed. There will be more times to experiment, now he wants to play safe. Plus, he thinks it’s a pretty intimate position, that allows you to look at each other. He doesn’t want to miss any of your reactions.
No doubts that while he was in Anbu, Kakashi lent him some of his erotic novels. That’s all his previous knowledge.
Lots of kissing while you undress each other. Itachi is going to take his sweet time admiring every inch of your body. And he constantly compliments you, saying how beautiful you are.
He’s completely selfless in bed, and he cares more about you own pleasure than his own. And this is a special occasion, so he’ll worship you as you deserve.
I picture him as a boob guy, so he’s going to pay a considerable amount of attention to each one. He massages one, rubbing the nipple, while he sucks and kisses the other one, slightly biting your other nipple.
Then he continues going down your body, and he eats you until you cum at least twice. He wants you to get really wet for what’s coming later.
As it’s his first time, his skills may not be the best yet. But being a ninja, he has full knowledge of the human body, and he definitely knows where the clit is.
He’s also very intuitive, and he will pay attention to all your reactions, and see what works out and what doesn’t.
While he’s eating you, he loves looking up at you and see your boobs, and your facial expressions of pleasure.
Please, pull his hair. It turns him on.
Then he introduces two fingers and starts carefully stretching you a little.
I didn’t say it before, but he’s consent king. Every time he’s doing something different, he’s asking you if you’re comfortable or if you want to stop.
No, but really, you may even think that he’s asking you too many times.
“Please, stop talking, and do something else with your tongue.”
jk, but if you say something like that, while grabbing his hair and guiding him back to your pussy, he will get incredibly turned on.
Please, moan his name, it’s music to his ears. It also boosts his ego thinking that he’s the one making you say such lewd noises.
He has to force himself to stop eating you. He could do it all day because you taste sooo good. He has found his new favourite dessert.
Once he’s done with you down there, he gets ready to get inside you.
He asks you once more if you want to continue.
When you agree, he slips his dick along your slit, before getting slowly inside you. At the same time, he incessantly kisses your lips and your neck, while massaging your boobs. He understands that getting used to his size may be a bit uncomfortable for you, so he wants you to be as excited as possible.
Talking about size, his girth is average, but it’s a bit longer (16.5 – 17cm), with the head slightly curved upwards. Perfect to hit all the right spots.
Once he gets fully in you, he stops so you get used to the new feeling. He continues kissing you, with brief pauses to praise you, and tell you how much of a good job you’re doing. He’s very vocal praising you.
When you move your hips wanting more, he gets the hint, and he starts a slow but constant pace.
Itachi’s on cloud nine. He can’t believe how good it feels to be inside you, how well your walls adapt to him. But he has to use every ounce of self-control to not go any faster. The last thing he wants is to hurt you.
More kisses all over your upper body. He will leave hickeys too.
He wants to hear you moaning his name.
Bonus points if you pull his hair or scratch his back.
Dirty talk too. While he thrusts into you, and rubs your nipple, he whispers in your ear how much of a good girl you are, with that soft and low voice of his.
He smirks if he notices that his voice increases your arousal.
He pays attention to your expression when he thrusts into you. When he notices that spot that makes you moan his name even louder, he makes it his mission to hit it constantly.
When you’re close, he rubs your clit to increase your pleasure.
He won’t cum until you do it first.
He doesn’t moan much during sex, but he lets a low one escape when he’s done.
When you two are done, he will slowly pull out of you. It’s your first time, so he’s being extremely nice. There will be more times in the future to overstimulate you (this boy is already planning things 🤭).
King of aftercare (is there anything he’s not king of?)
Lots of kissing and cuddling. It’s ok if you doze off a bit, but he won’t let you fell asleep. At least you have to get up and pee. He read that it’s healthier to do it after having sex, so you can’t refuse.
He also brings you water, and some snacks if you tell him that you’re feeling hungry. He starts preparing a hot bath for you two.
He cleans you up thoroughly before you get into the bath (think about Japanese baths), and he uses this as an excuse to caress and massage again every inch of your body. He will melt if you do the same to him (poor baby is touch starved 🥺) (I promise to write something where reader worships him because he deserves it).
You take a long bath. He embraces you, and he lovingly caresses your tummy, while you draw circles on his forearms.
Itachi is on seventh heaven. He wishes this moment to last forever.
You get out when the water starts to cool. You go to bed and cuddle until you fall asleep.
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antiodote · 2 years
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she can’t finish and they fight.
warnings: smut (18+), angst
•••
stress was coursing through her veins at every waking moment.
she had been feeling like this for the past two months. scoring a promotion at work meant a lot of things. it meant she got paid more, sure, but it also meant that she had more responsibility than ever before.
ever since her days at school, she craved validation; she needed somebody to tell her that she was doing good, that her efforts were not going unnoticed, that she did the right thing, and that she was good. she never quite figured out where that need came from, but she had an inkling that it must have something to do with the way her mother had raised her.
she, also, never quite figured out how to deal with it healthily, which is why all of her friends knew her as the archetype of a workaholic. she was working all the time and rarely had any time for herself, but she loved her work, so it didn’t seem like a big deal to her.
it was a big deal to harry, though.
harry, who was also a self-proclaimed workaholic, saw how much it was tearing at her and could practically smell the burnout from miles and miles away. it didn’t help that her boss didn't believe in words of affirmation and just piled on more work for her to do every chance she got. harry knew that it was eating away at her, he knew that her way of coping, which was not at all, would eventually come back to bite her in the ass. in any other situation he probably would have done something. he keeps telling her to take a break and to rest a bit; the hypocrisy of it doesn’t go unnoticed by either of them, though. truthfully, harry was also as busy as ever. with the release of his new album, movie promotions and public appearances, he rarely has time to rest himself.
before their lives got all too complicated, they had plenty of time to spend together, even with their already busy schedule. they’d go on hikes and cook and watch movies; they were a proper couple. happy and unbothered. shielded from any and all obstacles. maybe they both knew, deep down, that their honeymoon phase was coming to an end. to them, however, that seemed like it was light-years away.
and yet, here they were.
it was the umpteenth time that she had returned from work at an ungodly hour, even later than harry. he usually left to go to the studio after making breakfast for the both of them, and usually, neither of them would end up eating most of it. harry used to playfully bug her about her eating habits. he tried reminding her of the importance of three meals a day, every day. she brushed it off then and it was fine; now, however, it worries and agitates harry to no end. this morning she had left without so much as looking at it, once again. she bid her rushed goodbye and chose to forego a peck on the lips. she had forgotten so much lately that harry began to wonder if it had been on purpose, but since he isn’t the kind to ask for affection he guesses he will never know.
they meet for what feels like the first time that day in their shared bedroom. she comes in with her bag in tow and exhaustion written all over her features and it pained harry to see her like that. however, he too was feeling more than exhausted. it became harder and harder to feel sorry for her if he was being honest with himself. not when he felt like it was preventable.
“hi.”
“hello.”
silence.
“I’m sorry for coming home late again. I know it’s been happening too much. I don’t mean to…” she tried explaining herself as she did so often. harry understood and he wasn’t mad, but the defeat in his demeanour was palpable.
“it’s alright, came home late myself. how was work?“
“same old. how was the studio?”
“fine.” a lie.
harry had been having trouble writing as of late. everything he did write was either too sad to release or just not good at all. apparently, the way their relationship was falling apart seemed to directly affect his creative writing process. it was a mess, truly. he didn’t have the heart to tell her that though. he didn’t want to make her feel more guilty than she probably already did.
“okay, good.”
harry returned to reading his book, albeit halfheartedly, while she was busy looking at him - really looking at him - for the first time in ages. she is shocked to find him looking so… defeated? she wants to beat herself up for not noticing the prominence of his under-eye bags, the dullness of his skin, and even the way his hair looks unkempt and tousled. does she also look this restless? she realises, then and there, that they haven’t made proper conversation for the better part of 6 weeks, and she can’t help but feel like it’s her fault. she knows they have both been very busy, but had she made an effort to do something to at least save her relationship? she doesn’t think so.
“so, uh, we haven’t talked in a while, huh?” she sets her bag by the door and moves to her side of the bed, her side facing him while she removes her jewellery. harry sets his book down as well, hoping they would finally be able to break the cycle. the moonlight shines brightly into their bedroom window, illuminating the side of her face. if the situation was different, he might tell her how beautiful she looks, despite her visible fatigue. he doesn’t know what’s stopping him if he’s honest. what he doesn’t know is that when she faces him and sees how the warm light from the lamp on his bedside table illuminates his features, her breath oh so subtly hitches, too. she thought he was beautiful, always. like the sun, always illuminating. unfortunately, his light seemed dull lately.
fire and ice; the sun and the moon facing one another. that’s what they represent. so close, yet so far away. they used to dance in unison, but they seemed to have forgotten how to dance. why? what happened to them? it felt like they both knew, and yet? they didn’t know what to do.
except she thought she did.
she moved closer to him, fully sitting on the bed now. her blouse pulled out of her trousers, her hair down and her glasses thrown aside somewhere. facing him, she took the book out of his grasp and bent over his stretched-out legs to put it back on his nightstand. she made sure to let her chest graze over his crotch. she wanted to dance again, in a different way. a way they used to have perfected. the last time they danced was way too long ago, though, but she hopes they still remember the steps.
he held his breath, not quite knowing what to do just yet. where was this going? he wasn’t entirely sure and he didn’t want to risk fucking it up. this was the first time she had been close to him in what feels like forever and he missed her touch so much that it hurt. she moved back into a seated position, facing him.
“tell me something. anything. I miss your voice.”
he looks at her, puzzled. what could he tell her? he wrecked his brain for something, anything to tell her. something that wasn’t too boring or too sad. he found himself feeling insecure, for whatever reason. so, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath, he decides to listen to his heart and let his mind stop working for a bit. this was his love, he would be fine. he knew how to talk to her, he was fine. he was fine.
he opens his eyes again and speaks.
“well, mitch and sarah might want to try for another baby. they’ve been loving parenthood, it seems. I think it really suits them, too. and, uh, jeff and I have been talking about tour dates, which is always a hassle, as you know. oh! I might have to go to italy to reshoot some scenes for the movie. um, yeah.” his monologue was cut short by the sheer fact that he doesn’t know what else to talk about. the oxygen in the room seems to lessen by the second and his throat feels tight. why was he like this? could he not just act normal right now? why did he feel the need to talk to her about how he felt like they were falling apart? and how that was scaring the hell out of him? losing her seemed like such an unrealistic concept not too long ago, whereas now it feels like it’s just around the corner. he feels constricted and he hated every second of it.
“that’s nice, hm? mitch and sarah having another baby? god, I hope it works out for them. it would give you more godfather duties.” she tries to lighten the mood and it works, if only for a second. harry wants to ask her about her day, as well. however, listening to her work struggles right now would be sure to set him off, so he decides against it. and thus, silence falls heavy upon them, once more.
“what happened to us, love?”
he spoke up, his voice sounding uncharacteristically little. he voiced his fear.
here we go.
“I used to be able to talk to you for, what, hours? without any problems. but now it just feels so…different. why?”
he faces her and finds an apologetic look on her face, probably mirroring his own. they felt defeated. lost. what did happen to them?
she sighed heavily, not even trying to deny anything. “I…I don’t know, harry. I don’t know.” a beat of silence lingered again. “I miss us. I miss you, all the time. I don’t like what happened to us, it’s like we drifted apart, don’t you think?” he says. his heart feels like it could burst out of his chest at any given moment with how nervous and stressed he felt.
“do you still love me?” he asks, knowing just how pathetic he must sound. she replies instantly. “of course I do, harry. always. do you still love me?”
“yes, I do. so much.”
her fear turned into desperation. she had to do something, and she had to do it now. she moves closer to him, their faces now mere inches apart. she laces her hand into his own, slowly and carefully, afraid to do something wrong. she looks at him once more and tries not to wince at how dull his eyes looked. if she dwelled any longer on how it might have something to do with her, she might collapse. so, urgently, she moves their joined hands onto his lap.
“good. let me show you how much I love you then. please, can I?”
their hands apply pressure on their resting spot just over his crotch, clearly sending a message. he closes his eyes and relishes the feeling. he felt like they should talk first, to work through any of the problems they might be experiencing. he couldn’t bring himself to do it, though. because right now, the only thought in his mind was how he needed to feel close to her, immediately. he felt selfish, but couldn’t bring himself to care. so he nods. “please.” and in an instant, she moves closer.
their lips attach. relief floods him.
there she was. his moonlight.
heat surrounds them, quicker than they’d care to admit, and everything felt good, for once. the world stopped, and it was just the two of them. nothing else mattered. he was feeling her again, and it was good.
she moves to sit on his lap with her thighs surrounding his own. her hands migrate to his scalp to tangle them through his hair, the way she knew he liked. he moved his own hands to her blouse, desperate to take it off, desperate to feel her. he undoes the buttons and slides it off her shoulders, removing her hands from his head in the process. their mouths move in unison, their movements are rushed and desperate. they needed this. they needed to feel connected like only they knew how. in a rush to feel her skin, he peels off her sports bra, leaving her in nothing but her dress pants. his hands find her chest and in an instant, he starts playing her like an instrument, gaining a plethora of sweet whines from her. she grinds down on him, feeling the growth in his trousers. everything is hot, rushed and filled with need; their arousal growing by the second. she detaches her mouth from his to take a breath, a string of saliva connecting them, still.
“fuck, harry. please, please. I need… I need, god-“
he didn’t wait for her to finish before attaching his mouth to her nipple, sucking harshly. a high-pitched whine leaves her and she grinds down harder, making him groan. he uses his other hand to play with her other breast, and when he moves his head to lick a bold stripe in between the valley of her chest, squeezing her tits in his way, he wonders if this is heaven. this, or the treasure between her thighs. as soon as the thought enters his brain, he detaches himself from her chest in an attempt to move them into a laying position.
“need to taste you, angel. please, let me-“
“no, harry, please. need to feel you. need to feel you inside, please. need to feel full.”
they make eye contact and he contemplates her words. “you can taste me whenever else you want, honey. just need to feel you in me now, okay?” she says, with her hands in his hair once more. he closes his eyes and basks in the comfort she radiates. she was truly remarkable. and truthfully, he couldn’t possibly think of a better sensation than to be berried deep within her walls.
“yeah, okay angel. let me make you feel good, hmm?”
“yes, god yes. thank you, thank you, thank you.”
she lifts herself from her position on his lap and steps off the bed. they simultaneously remove any remaining articles of clothing, leaving nothing but naked skin in sight. she kneels onto the bed once more, resuming her previous position. harry's hands roam all over her body, squeezing her behind and finally resting on her love handles.
“you’re unbelievable. so fucking stunning, god. kiss me, please.”
she grants his wish momentarily, letting his tongue roam freely. they were in ecstasy, purely and utterly consumed with one another. she blindly reaches for his length underneath her, gripping him at the base and gifting him a few languid strokes. her thumb finds his tip and she starts spreading any and all precum around, preparing him. he moans, no, whines into her mouth, his eyes screwed shut in utmost pleasure.
“fuck, fuck, fuck. please, baby, I can’t take it. let me feel you, now.”
she smiled, kissing his nose. she loved his eagerness and how he wasn’t afraid to show it.
“I’ll give you what you need, don’t worry, baby.”
and so, she moves to sit down and truly, she couldn’t wait to feel him, as she had really, really missed it. terribly so.
she guides him inside, preparing herself mentally for the highest form of pleasure she had ever experienced-
or…not?
“ah, fuck! wait, hold on-“
she couldn’t get him inside, but not because of his size. no, she just so happens to be bone dry. no arousal was surrounding her, not even a little bit. this had never happened before, and it left her at a loss. she looks down again, just to make sure that she was feeling it correctly. and there it was, nothing. she should be dripping by now, especially with how turned on she was, but alas, the contrary seemed to be the case.
she looks at him now, helplessly, and at a loss for what to do.
“what’s wrong, you okay? not feeling up to it? we can stop-“
“no! no, absolutely not. I want this so bad, you have no idea. I don’t know what’s happening, honestly. I- I- maybe I can- or we could-“
he grabs her by the jaw, grounding her for a moment. his eyes search for hers, offering reason and calm, and relief floods her as she sees how his eyes look more alive than they did a few minutes ago.
“hey, hey, calm down. you’re okay, petal.” a kiss. “let me just get the lube, yeah? don’t worry about it.” she takes a deep breath. “yeah, okay. thank you.” another kiss.
he reaches over to his bedside table, opening the little drawer underneath. located in-between packs of condoms, some melatonin tablets and an emergency pack of cigarettes, he finally found what he was looking for: the small bottle of water-based lube. neither of them exchange words, just glances, as he shuts the drawer, opens the bottle, and squirts some of the product on his hand. once the bottle is closed and set aside, he uses his clean hand to guide her slightly upwards, freeing him from the delicious confines of her thighs. he then spreads the product on and around his length, wincing slightly at the cool temperature. once he feels like he’s coated himself sufficiently, he guides her down once more.
“tell me if it hurts and I stop, okay?”
she nods.
deep breaths. shaky hands. unsure glances.
and then…
“oh my god.”
euphoria.
“holy shit, baby. fuck. so fucking perfect for me, aren’t you? jesus.”
she sinks all the way down his length, filling her up to the brim. her head is thrown back and her mouth agape in pleasure, not a single sound escaping her for the first few moments. that is until he starts thrusting up and into her.
“good god, harry, fuck!” the delicious stretch of her walls made her want to scream, a feeling that she doesn’t think she could ever get tired of. “please don’t stop, oh my god!” her words only encouraged him more, making sure to keep his pace steady and to hit her spot every single time. with her head still thrown back and her jaw slack, harry took the opportunity to just stare at her pleasure-filled face, which only got him off more. she always looked beautiful, but like this? she was unbelievable. he thinks at that moment that he should probably write a song about it.
a particularly hard thrust made her snap forward. “fucking hell, I feel you in my tummy.” she laced her hands around his jaw and rested her forehead against his own, staring deeply into his eyes and stealing the occasional kiss. harry took this moment to steady her hips and thrust up into her with such vigour, that her eyes rolled all the way back into her skull. she had to wrap her arms around his shoulders and hug him close to stabilise herself. and then, something weird happened.
usually, with the way he was pounding into her and with how he was moaning straight into her ear, she would be done in seconds. however, now that his face was no longer in her line of sight, her mind started clouding itself with other images.
“make sure you get this back to me by the end of the day. no more slacking off.”
she squeezed her eyes shut. this couldn’t be happening, not now.
“you have to do this over entirely, this is not what I had in mind at all.”
god, no. no, no, no!
“this is unbelievably sloppy, you cannot be serious, right? you’re staying late today, this is unacceptable.”
what the actual fuck was happening?
“baby, you okay?”
her eyes opened wide in an instant. he tried prying her arms away so he could look at her properly. she, however, only hugged him closer.
“yes! yes, I’m good. so fucking good.” she made sure to make her voice extra sultry, grinding down on him to make it all more believable. she cannot let him know that she got ridiculously close to having an anxiety attack in the middle of what was supposed to be mind-boggling sex.
he couldn’t help but groan at her actions, however, he continued. “you sure? your heart is beating very fast. do you- ah!- do you need some water, maybe?” he tumbled over his words as she made sure to squeeze her walls tight to shut him up.
“I’m okay, I don’t need anything. just need you to make me come, please.” she continued squeezing him, both with her arms and her walls until he was putty in her hands. no more words left him as he started thrusting up into her once again, moaning at the sensation her delicious pussy was giving him.
“you feel fucking unreal right now, angel. how do you feel, tell me? please, god, tell me.” he was begging for her, another thing that could usually make her come in an instant. right now, however, she really didn’t think that it was going to happen anytime soon.
how was she feeling? well, for starters, she was feeling embarrassed and confused because somehow, she didn’t get wet when her hot shot of a boyfriend practically devoured her tits and called her angelic, especially because she thought she was super turned on to begin with. and as if that wasn’t enough, she was now drowning in mental images and intrusive thoughts of her workplace and her bitch of a boss, which was the very thing that is currently tearing at her relationship. and she worried, that if she doesn’t get her shit together immediately, she might not come at all. so, fake it till you make it, she guessed.
“fuck, harry, I feel so fucking good. y’make me feel so. fucking. good.” slurring her words and repeating simple sentences; that should be enough to convince him that it’s genuine. she was trying to get into it again, but so far, nothing. she made sure to grind down and twist her hips how she knew he loved. on top of it all, she nibbled at his neck, jaw and ear to really get him going. and she knew it was working when his whines got louder with each thrust.
“shit baby, you feel bloody fantastic. please, god, tell me you’re close, need you to cum f’me.”
he was begging and whining for her like that was his sole purpose in this life, which made her feel all the more guilty for how her body was not reacting at all. he could very well be stroking her thumb right now, and it’d probably have the same effect. but she was determined to make him feel good, both physically and mentally, because he deserved it. the last thing she wanted to do was to make him feel guilty about something that he had nothing to do with.
so, she did what any other stupidly in-love woman would do: she faked her fucking orgasm.
“harry, god, fuck, I’m so close- I-“
“yeah, angel? let go f’me, get my cock all wet, c’mon.”
and that’s exactly what she did, or at least, tried to make him believe.
“god fucking- ah!”
and with all the core strength that she had, she squeezed her walls incredibly tight around him. she even tried to put some pressure on her bladder to maybe release some fluids, just to make it more believable. she was all too aware of his eyes on her, staring in awe at her alleged release. and just like she hoped it would, it triggered his own release just mere moments later.
“baby, fuck! that’s it, good god, that’s- oh!”
warm fluid filled her to the brim and she thinks under any other circumstances, the sheer intensity would’ve had to trigger her own orgasm. and yet, there she was.
shame was making her blood run cold, goosebumps littered her skin and she had this sudden urge to get out of the room to forgo any awkward conversation, but she knew she wasn’t going to be that lucky.
“you okay?”
he ripped her out of her thoughts in an instant, and suddenly he was facing her. his face was soft with pleasure, a post-orgasmic glow etched his features and a tired smile was gifted to her. he looked relaxed, comfortable and most of all he looked really, really happy.
she could not mess this up.
“yeah, I’m good. you?”
“very much so, angel.” he moved his hand to her cheek and oh so very softly moved any stray hair away from her face and tucked them behind her ear. the silence around them felt heavy, almost deafening to her. to him, however, it was pure bliss.
they stared at each other until it became unbearable for her, so she tried to move but his hand on her waist stopped any movement in its tracks.
“wanna cuddle for a bit?”
it became apparent to her that he was holding on to this sliver of positive energy they had created. she felt flattered over the fact that he wanted her around. the feeling however quickly dissipated and was replaced with guilt, shame and fear. she had to be by herself for a bit, she needed to get her head straight.
“let me just do my thing in the loo really quick, okay? i’ll be back before you know it, darling.” she reasoned. he nods, gives her a chaste kiss on the lips and nose, and lets her go. a hiss leaves both of them as she removes herself from him and she makes sure to keep the mess to a minimum. without looking back, she quickly walks to their shared bathroom, locking the door behind her. as soon as her bum hits the toilet seat, the tears flow and the shame begins to manifest itself into a big, green monster in her mind. how could she do this? how could she lie to him about something as stupid as this? more importantly, why could she not come? as the questions multiplied, the answers came short. she never wanted to be this person, and yet, there she was. does she tell him? does she keep the lie going? does she pretend to be so tired and fall asleep as soon as her head hits the pillows? she doesn’t want to do any of those things. instead, she selfishly wants to bask in the warmth radiating from her boyfriend, now that he is in post-orgasmic bliss. maybe she’ll be selfish for once if her mind allows it.
“oh god.”
frustration is now emanating from every pore of her body and she decides then that she has to leave this bathroom before things start looking suspicious. so, she finishes up, takes a deep breath and does not dare to look at herself in the mirror as she leaves.
she comes back to their bedroom and is momentarily confused when she finds him in his boxers and surrounded by a cloud of smoke. his back was facing her as he leaned over the railing of the balcony, shoulders visibly sagging with every breath.
“h? why are you smoking? everything okay?”
harry is by no means a smoker. he’s the kind of person to only reach for them when he is going through heavy emotional turmoil. he wouldn’t even smoke when he drank, so this scene was more than upsetting to her. especially because she already had an inkling of what could have possibly caused this action of his.
he turns around, the lazy smile no longer to be seen. instead, his eyes look even more dull than before and his cheeks have a rosy tint to them, almost like he just finished crying himself. she felt her heart sink and suddenly becomes increasingly aware of the severity of the situation.
this was bad.
“why don’t you tell me who you’re cheating on me with, darling.”
•••
a/n: hiiii, i’m back! sorry it took so long, i’ve been super busy with preparing for my move and also seeing harry in hamburg (and getting covid </3) anyways, this needs a part two, but that isn’t quite finished yet. this is also very different from anything else i’ve ever written before, so any feedback is truly appreciated!!!
4.7k words, not proofread (sorry!), lowercase intended
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WIBTA for bringing a fake boyfriend to my friend's party?
to condense as best i can, i (30, transwoman, city of pop. >10million) recently become the mother hen to a brood of wonderful baby queers (8 total, 17-23, boys and girls, all moved for school in the last year or so, most had never set foot in ANY city before). we live on the same floor of an apartment complex, and we've all grown very close over the past months; i help them use the metro, they tell me when they're going on dates and text so i know they got home safe, i cook weekend dinners, and they all slept in my living room for a week when another apartment on the floor was broken into. i think of them as somewhere between friends, younger relatives, or even my own children.
recently, one of the older ones (21) has realized he's also trans and come out to me, and i'm so proud and grateful that i can guide him through his early transition. unfortunately, there's his mother.
he'd first told me her response to his coming out was "better than expected", so i assumed she was tolerant, if not supportive yet. i've since learned she continually misgenders him, thinks this is a "tomboy phase" he'll marry out of someday, and has begun listening to more right-wing podcasts and news sites in order to "hear from both sides".
along with the other 7 kids, i've been invited to stay at the family's farm for his birthday in august, & while he's assured me she won't make a scene with company around, he's implied she has many opinions about my prescense, but said that i shouldn't tone myself down, and that if anything "it would be good for her to learn to be kind to you early, since we're family too now". two of the girls are partners, which the mother knows, but she does not seem to care about this and said that bringing a date was fine.
i have another friend (31) who's much more loudly queer than i am. on top of this, he's heavily tattooed (HUGE taboo here), rides a motorcycle, and is very outspoken and unshakable. i told him about all of this, and he offered to come along as my boyfriend, both to bother this woman, and so i won't be in a tiny (population SEVENTY-THREE!) unfamiliar town alone if anything happens. he's met the kids several times now, they get along well, and the birthday boy has said "that all sounds hysterical. do whatever you want."
my worry here is that the mother is already MUCH worse than he'd first lead me to believe, so i don't know that i can trust the kid's judgment that everything will be fine. i don't care about hurting this woman at all, and both i and my friend have dealt with even nastier people before so i'm not afraid of her, but i DO NOT want to do anything that could put this boy in a difficult position, especially since he'll likely be living with his family every summer until he's finished school, if not longer. i know what i can personally tolerate, but i don't know what he can, especially from a mother.
would i be an asshole to bring my "boyfriend" along? is it best to just go solo? or should i stay away entirely until he's back in the city?
What are these acronyms?
459 notes · View notes
strniohoeee · 5 months
Text
Broken
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Pairing: Matt Sturniolo X Female Reader
Synopsis: Y/N is depressed, and Matt takes notice to her behavior. Matt being the good friend he is he tries to get her out of her funk, but will it work?🫂
Warnings⚠️: None just mentions of depression. This was a request but Tumblrs being a munch and not letting me add it
Song for the imagine: hope ur ok- Olivia Rodrigo
But, God, I hope that you’re happier today
Cause I love you
And I hope that you’re okay
It’s been getting worse. I hate this feeling, this darkness that consumes me. I wanted nothing more than to feel okay. I hate the way my depression swallowed me whole and made me want to disappear from the face of the earth.
I just wanted to feel okay, I wanted to feel normal and not drained. I know my friends were getting annoyed with me. I would slip into these phases of not wanting to talk to them, see them, go out with them. I mean I could barely get out of my bed to do anything. Often skipping meals and not drinking water. I would just sleep all fucking day and cry when I was awake.
I was fortunate enough to be an influencer, so I didn’t have to worry about actually getting up to work. I posted YouTube drafts and TikTok drafts. It worked for a while, but people started to catch on, and were wondering where I went. I couldn’t even be honest and come out and say I was so depressed I couldn’t even sit up in my bed.
The one person who noticed the fastest was Matt. Randomly one day he started texting me wondering how I was doing, what I was doing, if I wanted to hang out with him and his brothers, if I wanted to join them for dinner, if I wanted to film a video with them. I appreciated it truly, but I also kept lying to him. Telling him that I was busy or I had plans, or I was filming. I could not allow anyone to see me this way. I mean I didn’t even want to see myself this way…..
Matt had put me in a groupchat with Chris and Nick, and honestly it was making me feel better. They kept my mind off of things by constantly making me laugh. I mean they would text from 10AM till 2AM every single day.
The blue eyed freaks🧿🧿
-Y/N can you pleaseeeeee come hang out with us we haven’t seen you in like two months- Chris
-Idkkkk -me
-plzzzzz like you never hangout with us anymore-Nick
-yeah I’ve just been busy-me
-busy??? Yeah right not busy enough to not hang out with us- Chris
-hey if she doesn’t want to hangout don’t force her, but we do miss you and would love to see you-Matt
-thanks Matt🖤-me
-booooo boring come over now, or I’ll come pick you up-Chris
-you can’t even drive Chris-me
-okay….ill get matt to drive me to come pick you up-Chris
-fineeeeee okay fine I’ll be over in a hour-me
-FUCKKKKK FINALLY OMG YES- Chris
-see yall soon<3-me
I had gotten up and decided to shower, washing my hair and just really try to clear my mind, and enjoy the fact that I’m getting to see my friends again. I hadn’t been out of my house in a good month, and this was giving me major anxiety.
I felt like once they’d see me they would know I haven’t been okay, and that’s something that scared me. I had to seem okay. I was never the one who broke down… ever.
I hadn’t finished getting ready. At first I wanted to put on some makeup to hide my dark eyes, but I decided against it because I really wasn’t in the mood. I headed out, and drove to the triplets house. When I got there Matt texted me letting me know that the door was unlocked and to meet them in his room.
I let myself in and walked to Matt’s room.
“Y/N” Chris yelled coming over and hugging me
“Hi guys” I said laughing
“She’s aliveeee” Nick said hugging me
“How have you guys been?” I asked plopping myself down on Matt’s bed with them
“We’ve been good, just filming honestly” Matt said
“Nice that’s always fun” I said
“I love it so much truly, but how have you been?” Nick asked
“I’ve been good, you know. Just uhhh been busy” I said lying straight through my teeth
“Nice, what have you been doing” Matt asked
“Oh you know just filming and editing and just going out with some of my other friends” I said
“I love your hair color by the way, when did you dye it red?” Chris asked me
“Oh like two months ago I need to get my roots done actually” I said running my hands through my hair
“Two months ago? I thought this was recent all your TikTok’s and YouTube videos your hair was black” Matt said looking at me suspiciously
“Oh uhhh” was all I could manage because I knew Matt was onto me
“Okay anyways I’m hungry” Chris said breaking the awkwardness
“Me too” Nick said
“McDonald’s?” Chris asked
“Fuck yes” Matt responded
“Okay Matt can you pick it up for us” Chris said pleading
“Uhhh I guess i have too since yall can’t drive” he said rolling his eyes
“I can drive” I said smiling
“Yayyyy this is why I love you” Chris said
“I’ll mobile order it so it’s less stressful” Nick said
They all put in their orders, and they handed the phone to me. My anxiety making me nauseous and not really in the mood to eat
“Oh I don’t think I’m going to get anything” I said
“WHAT? McDonald’s is your favorite” Nick said
“Uhh yeah I’m just not in the mood” I said
“Do you want something else?” Matt asked
“No I’m not hungry” I said looking at him
Matt nodded before taking the phone, messing with it f and then handing it to Nick.
“Alright let’s head out” I said
“Nick and I want to stay back y’all can go though” Chris said
“Sneaky fucks” Matt said laughing
Matt and I had gotten into my car heading over to the McDonalds
“What’s really going on?” Matt asked
“What do you mean?” I asked glancing over at him
“I know you’re not okay” he said looking at me
“Matt I’m fine” I said
“No you’re not. Your eyes…..I can tell that you’re sad” he said
“I’m just tired is all” I said swallowing thickly
“Y/N be honest…are you okay?” He asked reading my face for an answer
My lip quivered, and a lump formed in my throat. Nobody has asked me if I was okay.
“No” I whispered out in a croak
“Talk to me” he said sitting up
“I just don't know. I’ve been so depressed lately. I haven’t been able to get out of my bed. I’ve just been posting drafts because I can’t even get up to film. I can’t even get up to drink or eat anything. I miss my parents, I miss home and I just feel so alone. You were the first person to text me, and you have helped me a lot actually. You inviting me over was the first thing I have done in a month” I said letting a tear fall
“I’m so sorry you feel that way. I love you so fucking much, and I knew something was wrong that’s why I reached out. I care for you so much, and I don’t want you to struggle alone. I’m here for you” he said looking at me with saddened eyes
“I appreciate it Matt truly. You’re amazing” I said looking over at him and smiling weakly
“Never allow yourself to struggle alone okay. Please reach out to me or Nick or even Chris as crazy as that seems. We will always be here for you….always” he said
“I will. I just was fighting with myself for so long I couldn’t reach out for help” I said wiping my tears
“And that’s okay. No ones pressuring you to reach out, but know that the option is there. I would never turn you away. You know I’ll come flying to you in a heartbeat” he said nudging my shoulder
“I know Matt. I love you so much thank you for being here for me” I said nudging him back
“Also I got you your favorite from McDonald’s. I’m making sure you eat. I can tell you haven’t eaten. I can see it in your face” he said
“Thank you Matt what would I do without you” I said smiling at him
“I’m not sure actually” he said
“Don’t get too cocky” I said pointing my finger at him
We laughed, and I pulled up to the drive thru. We got our food, and we headed back home
We got back to their house, and started to eat in the kitchen. Laughing and catching up. Matt occasionally looking over at me, giving me reassuring smiles and glances.
I spent the night at their house, and I slept in Matt’s room. We watched my favorite childhood movies as he kept asking me if I was okay, and taking small glances at me.
Eventually we ended up falling asleep.
What would I do without Matt?
The End
This was a request, but Tumblr is actually being a dickrider so it wasn’t letting me put it with my story. But anywho I HOPE YOU ENJOYED THIS ONE🥹🖤🖤
-J💅🏽
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neopuppy · 1 year
Note
PSYCHO EX BOYFRIEND JENO WHO IS WILLING TO RUIN YOUR LIFE SO YOU HAVE NOBODY BUT HIM!!!! (idk if you write yandere type shit but i’ve been CRAVING :’) also i’ll take this anon opportunity to tell you i LOVE MISS AND APPRECIATE YOU GIRLLLL <333 i hope all is well with you ! sending happy thoughts your wayyyy ~
ty😘💚💚💚
warnings: yandere, dubious, possessive behavior
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Hearing three words should be something you dream about, look forward to with a smile on your face.
“Has he dropped the big L yet?” Your friends would always ask, as expected, coming up on a year of a nearly perfect relationship, as far as what they could see.
“Not yet,” you say, squirming uncomfortably, avoiding their disappointed pouts.
“He definitely will soon, Jeno’s obsessed with you.”
Nodding, you check your phone again, 15 text messages await you. The same anxious tingle you’ve become used to fills your chest, swiping open quickly to skim through your boyfriend's repetitive messages.
‘Where are you?’
‘Why didn’t you tell me you were going out?’
‘Who are you with?’
‘Why aren’t you answering your phone??’
‘Stop ignoring my calls.’
‘Answer me right now.’
The thing is, Jeno is obsessed with you, overbearingly so. The puppy love phase of your relationship came and went, and maybe you’re to blame; falling more and more each day for your seemingly perfect boyfriend.
“There you are.” Jeno’s arms come around your shoulders from behind, bending down to grab your phone and unlock it with a quick motion tapping in your passcode. “Look at that, your phone works perfectly fine.” He whispers too quietly for any of your friends to catch onto.
“Jeno!” They squeal excitedly, fawning over how sweet he is to pick you up after lunch and even help you into your jacket. “You’re such a cute couple.”
You don’t say much when he’s around anymore, completely out of your comfort whenever he touches you now.
It was little things at first, showing up at the same coffee shop, conveniently running into you after every class, Jeno joking that you must be soulmates always finding each other.
That or he shared your location to his phone after your first month of dating one night after you passed out with your phone unlocked.
‘I don’t think this is going to work, I need a break..’ a few months ago you tried to end things, picking up on more odd behavior with time.
Jeno smiled confidently, pulling your back to his chest, laugh rumbling against you. ‘You think I’d ever let you leave me?’
Everything changed after that, he never left your side, the spare key to your apartment you once told him about left in place only to mock you. He made copies, informing you he’d find a way in regardless.
“She’s so lucky.” Your friends smiled on, waving goodbye as your boyfriend told them you had to get going.
“We have a schedule to view puppies at the animal shelter.” Jeno lied, kissing your cheek. “The start of our little family.”
He squeezes around you, kissing your earlobe. “Now say goodbye, and smile.”
On command you wave, forcing a smile as he leads you away. The drive home full of shouting, slamming on the steering wheel, Jeno furious with you for breaking his rules.
“I just miss my friends..” you mumble, choking back tears.
“I can’t have you disobeying me again.”
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“You know that I do this because I love you.”
That’s what Jeno always says, in fact he’s never been shy to express just how much he loves you. Exclaiming that you have no more time for work now, he’d take care of your rent and bills. Things like friends, a job, errands, those ‘stupid and pointless’ things take up time you could be spending with him.
“I didn’t want to do this again,” he sighs, fastening restraints around your wrists tightly. “All I do is show you love..”
He glares at you from the side, eyes thinned down to slits, sitting by your side and scanning down your bare skin. “You said it yourself that no one’s ever made you feel this way..”
Thin fingers graze down from the center of your chest, gliding between your rising breasts, tickling as they pass by your navel. “That’s because I love you baby,” shaking his head he pulls your legs apart. “I love you so much.”
Jeno’s emotions change so fast, you never know who you’re gonna get anymore, he can still be sweet but it comes from a dark place. A place full of manipulation and control, a hollowed sector of his mind where he keeps you locked up, the key tucked safely away in a hidden place only for him.
He keeps rambling, insisting he’s doing this to protect you, keep you out of harm’s way from men who want to hurt you, friends who try to use you, and family that want to take advantage of your gentle soul.
“I’m the only one you can trust, baby.” He hovers above, set between your thighs stroking up and down the soft ticklish flesh, occasionally meeting the skin covering your folds with a fleeting teasing touch. “I didn’t want it to get to this point..”
Jeno lifts your phone up with a scoff, shutting it off and tossing it aside to be forgotten. “You leave me no other choice.”
Hooking around your thighs, he pushes you into a high fold, core lifted up to his chin, his eyes sleek blaring down at the tears streaming down your cheeks. The gag in your mouth stretching your swollen lips apart, pathetic screams lost behind the cloth filling your mouth.
Jeno inhales deeply, nose running between your folds coated with wetness along his chin and upper lip, a smirk growing on his face the more he buries between your thighs. “I know you love me.” His tongue flicks at your entrance, flexing your stomach in the fold he’s trapped you in as he rolls against your hole.
Tears push out faster, biting down on the gag and squeezing your eyes shut, because he’s right. Pushing past your tight muscle Jeno’s tongue works through your heat, eyes burning across your face without breaking contact, nose shoved up against your clit as he pushes his jaw to the limit to fill your opening.
The struggle you put up pulling at your restraints only makes him smile, slurping up the arousal that drips from your core faster with each weak scream you let out.
Kissing up and down your folds, his lips appear swollen pink already, coated in a layer of slick to remind you of how much you want this, how much you want him.
“You’ll always belong to me.”
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allthingsfangirl101 · 2 months
Text
Rough Patch – Joe Keery
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The honeymoon phase in a relationship is real. So is the reality check that always follows once you wake up. Joe and I got married a year ago. The months leading up to the wedding were incredible. I never thought I'd be happier.
When we got back from our honeymoon and things started to settle down, he went back to work and I focused on fixing up our apartment. When he went back to work, he was gone a lot more. It made the first year very difficult for us. He wasn't around and I would get overwhelmed having to take care of everything while he was gone.
I have tried to be a supportive wife, but it's getting harder and harder for me. It's gotten too hard to go months without seeing each other, barely talking on the phone. I couldn't help but get tired of the unanswered texts and missed phone calls. I am tired of celebrating things by myself.
The last time he left was a few months before our first anniversary. He swore up and down that he'd be back in time. Our anniversary is tomorrow so I called him tonight to figure out our plans. He is getting on a plane first thing tomorrow morning and will be home by lunch.
"Hey, you."
"Hey, baby. Happy Almost Anniversary!" I giggled excitedly. "I am so excited, I have the entire night planned from the minute you get home to the minute we fall asleep naked in each other's arms. I thought we could go to the restaurant we had our first date. You know, the one you also proposed to me at? What time is your flight supposed to be getting in? I could pick you up from the airport and we could get lunch and then. . ."
"Y/N," Joe cut me off.
"Yeah?"
"I'm not going to be back in time."
My stomach dropped at his words. "What are you. . . What do you mean you won't be back in town?"
"No," he sighed. "Sorry."
"But. . ."
"It's not like it's a big deal," he mumbled.
"It's our anniversary, Joe," I said, the tears I was pushing down turning to anger. "It is a big deal. It's the first anniversary of our wedding, Joe. You can't just not come home. What? Am I supposed to celebrate by myself? That's. . . That's pathetic."
"Calm down, Y/N," he sighed. "We can celebrate it when I get home."
"And when will that be?" I demanded. "We've been married a year and I don't think we've spent more than one week sleeping in the same bed. You're never home, Joe."
"I work," he said.
"I'm aware of that but. . ."
"And what am I supposed to do, Y/N?" He challenged. "Not work? Well, if I don't work then we will become homeless. I have to work, Y/N."
"I know you have to work, Joe. But I feel like you see your coworkers more than you see your wife."
"That's normal. It happens."
"It shouldn't," I corrected. "Normal people with normal jobs go home to their wives every night. I can't remember the last time you worked on a job here in town and came home every night to me."
"What are you saying?" He challenged again. "You want me to quit?"
"No," I said quickly. "You know I never want that. I just want to see you more, Joe. I'm sorry for missing my husband."
I hung up the phone, the tears I'd been fighting finally falling. I sat on our bed, tears streaming down my face as I watched my hands shake. I waited for my phone to ring but it never did. I fell asleep that night with dried tears on my face and no messages on my phone.
* * * * *
I woke up on our anniversary completely alone. I forced myself out of bed and barely got myself dressed. I wore a simple pair of leggings and a baggy T-shirt. I slowly cleaned the apartment, going in and out of crying fits.
Around noon, my phone started ringing. When I saw who was calling me, my throat tightened. I let the phone ring as I saw Joe's contact picture. I couldn't bring myself to answer it. When it finally stopped ringing, I slowly walked away from my phone.
The day continued like that. I slowly went through my normal checklist of daily things to do, ignoring my phone that kept ringing. Around 3 o'clock, a delivery man came to the door and delivered flowers. I read the card but it didn't change how I felt.
I'm really sorry about not being there today. Please take yourself out to dinner and really spoil yourself. I will spoil you as soon as I get home. I promise! I love you, Y/N.
With Regret, Your Loving Husband, Joe.
I tossed the card onto the counter and left the flowers there. I didn't have the energy to accept his apology. This is what he always did. He missed important things, sent flowers, and came home acting like nothing happened. First, it was his birthday. Then it was Thanksgiving. He barely made it home on Christmas Day. He missed Valentine's Day. And now he was missing our anniversary.
I ordered some dinner and ate it while watching one of my favorite movies. Even my comfort movie didn't cheer me up. I threw away the trash and laid down on the couch. 
I was starting to fall asleep when there was a knock at the door. I slowly paused the movie and went to answer it. When I opened the door, my heart jumped into my throat.
"You're here," I said slowly.
"Hey, baby," Joe smiled weakly.
"Why did you knock on your own apartment?" I asked. "Did you lose your key?"
"No," he chuckled. "I didn't. I was just trying. . ."
"I thought you weren't getting in until late Monday night."
"I wasn't supposed to," he stuttered. "But after our fight last night and you weren't answering your phone this morning, I needed to talk to you. We need to talk about this, Y/N."
"You're missing work." I turned on my heel and walked back into our apartment.
"Y/N," he sighed as he chased after me. "Wait, hang on, baby. Please. Can we talk about this?"
"What is there to talk about?" I demanded as I turned around. "Clearly, your job is more important than our marriage."
"That's not true!" He defended.
"Really?" I challenged. "Joe, yesterday you acted like it wasn't a big deal to miss our first wedding anniversary."
"And that was wrong," he tried to interrupt.
"Do you know how many phone calls you miss? How many of my texts go unanswered? Do you know how many nights I go to sleep, wondering where my husband is and what he's doing? Wondering when I will see him? This hasn't been easy on me, Joe."
"It hasn't been easy on me either," he said.
"You have work to distract you from being alone," I cut him off. "I have nothing. I sit at home all day with nothing to do other than think about and miss my husband."
"You could always get a job." His sentence dropped when he saw the look on my face.
"You really want to go down this road?" I challenged.
"No, but. . ."
"But nothing," I cut him off again. "Joe, I can't keep doing this."
"Wait," Joe said quickly. He grabbed my hands, pulling me closer to him. He lowered his voice and whispered, "This is just a rough patch, baby. We can. . . We can work through this."
"Can we?" I asked, my voice breaking. "Because, right now, I feel like I've been doing all the work. I mean, when was the last time you called me? Joey, I don't know. . ."
Joe cut me off by pulling me closer and crashing his lips onto mine. I knew he was doing this to cut me off so I couldn't end this, but I didn't care. I missed this. I missed being in his arms. I missed being kissed by him. I missed the feeling he gave me as our lips moved in sync. I missed him.
I had tears streaming down my face as I broke the kiss. I took a step back, pulled my hands out of his, and wrapped my arms around myself.
"Joe," I whispered. "I can't be the only one in this relationship anymore. I mean. . . I feel like you don't love me anymore."
"What?" Joe gasped. "Y/N, do you really think. . . How could you. . . Y/N, baby, of course, I still love you. I never stopped. You really think that I stopped loving you?"
"Can you blame me?" My voice broke as the tears continued to stream down my face. Joe stepped up right in front of me and gently grabbed my elbows.
"I am so sorry that I made you think I didn't love you," he whispered. "I love you with all my heart, Y/N. You are the most important person in my life. I never should've made you feel like my job was more important than the love of my life. Please give me another chance. I will prove to you that you are more important. I will make sure you never go a day without knowing just how much I love you. I will do anything to make it up to you."
"I just need you around more," I said, my sob getting stuck in my throat. "I just need my husband."
Joe pulled me into his chest and wrapped his arms around my waist. I wrapped my arms around him and cried into his neck.
"I'm so sorry, baby," he whispered as he started rocking us back and forth. He reached up and started playing with my hair. He leaned down and kissed the top of my head. I didn't say anything as he led us over to the couch and sat us down, neither one of us letting go of the other.
"I have an idea," he started, his voice still soft. "Tomorrow, we are going to wake up and make breakfast together. Then, after we get ready, I'm going to take you shopping and buy you whatever you want. We'll get lunch and go see that new movie you've been dying to see. We'll get dinner, come home, and spend the rest of the night in bed."
"Joe," I giggled when he changed his voice at the end. I playfully pushed him, but he instantly pulled me back into his arms.
"I love you, Y/N," he whispered as he relaxed us into the couch. "And I am so sorry. It will never happen again. I promise, baby."
"I love you too, Joe."
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flamingpudding · 6 months
Text
Fictober23 Prompt: 16 - "Do you know a way out of here?"
Fandom: DPxDC
Rating: T
Warnings: -
"Danyal."
He flinched and slowly turned enough so he could look over his shoulder at the cockpit of the Fenton Speeder. Damian was staring at him with crossed arms and so was Jason, both looking very unimpressed with him.
"I got it! Don't worry!"
Damian was now glaring at him. "You said that ten minutes ago."
"Pretty sure we came past this floating rock over there before." Jason added to Danny's dismay. He floated over closer to the Speeder, his entire body language spelling out how nervous he was facing his twin and brother right now.
"I promise, I got this! A lot of the Infinite Realm looks very similar and aside from the floating doors nothing really differs here a lot. Unless you find the haunt of someone!"
"We know, you said that when we entered the portal, repeated it before that several times and every time we came here before, insisting on several safety measures." Damian retorted still with that unimpressed stare of his.
"Some safety measures that were, we still got attacked by one of your ghost rogues." Jason muttered, eying the thermos Danny had thrown at them when a guy, Walker, came at them with a bunch of other ghosts looking like security guards. They had sucked up most of them into it and then lost the last of them by zigzacking their way through this dimension.
It wasn't like this was their first time accompanying Danny into the Infinite Realms. Both Jason and Damian had come into this dimension several times before. Most of the time it was for checkups Jason or Danny had with Frostbite. Other times they just tagged along when Danny had to deal with something here. This was one of these times.
A floating eyeball had interrupted their breakfast and Danny after having gotten annoyed with it enough to shoot one of his ecto-blasts at it, hurriedly went down to the basement to the portal he had built there months ago. Jason just happened to be in the cave wanting to look something up on the batcomputer when he caught him preparing to go into the portal. And Damian as always, being the worried twin that still got an overprotective streak after months of having Danny with them also insisted on coming alone.
They had been lucky that it wasn't a school day or that Bruce had been busy with JL stuff to notice them going off into the Infinite Realm on their own. Now Jason regretted it just a little bit, because despite what Danny was saying, they were lost. It was probably only a matter of time until one of their other siblings noticed too. "So wanna bet how long it will take for the others to freak out on the coms of our disappearance? I don't think we left a note on where we went."
"I informed Pennyworth of our outing." Damian countered and Danny gave a nervous laugh. Jason couldn't help the chuckle that escaped him, fully knowing that Bruce was going to lecture Danny once more on safety precautions when traveling interdimensional. Like having someone man the coms at home base.
"This would be so much easier if I just had the map…" Danny muttered as he phased through the cockpit glass and stood next to them.
"The map you just happened to leave behind because you know the way to the castle by heart?" Damian rose an eyebrow at his now sheepish looking twin.
"I learned my lesson okay! I won't forget it next time!" Now Jason raised an eyebrow, he distinctly remembered Danny saying this before when they went to an appointment with Frostbite before and had gotten lost on the way back.
"Danyal. Do you know a way out of here? Or do we have to find a way to contact Pennyworth, father or any of the others?"
"I know where to go!" Danny jumped up phasing out of the Speeder again to look at their surroundings through the windows. Before pointing in a certain direction. "That way! If we get to Far Frozen we will be halfway back to the Manor's portal!"
Damian and Jason both arched an eyebrow once more nearly in sync. It wasn't Danny's fault, okay it was, but they were losing trust in his navigation skills. Especially since both were sure they had rounded that dead tree on a rock five times now. Just as the other was about to start leading them in that direction a blast hit the side of his head and both Jason and Damian shouted his name in worry.
"I am okay!" Danny shouted flying up to them before dodging more blasts that came his way. Damian then pushed Jason off the Speeders controls. Stirring it to follow his twin brother who was still dodging another one of his rogues that had decided to attack them on their way home.
"What is today?! Come and attack Danny day?!" The half ghost shouted as he flew zig zags around floating rocks and dodged ecto-blasts from a ghost, Jason remembered Danny called Skulker. This was the second one to attack them today, and one Jason knew Damian liked the least.
Damian had a personal grudge with this one, once he learned that the ghost was after his twin's 'pelt'. Personally Jason found it sort of hilarious considering Danny gets hunted by this Skulker and Skulker is getting hunted by Damian whenever the Demon Brat caught sight of him.
Though Danny had explained it to them once that it was just his rogues living out their obsession, it still didn't stop any of them getting at least somewhat protective when these ghost rogues showed up. After all their attacks were once that could hurt their brother and aside from the equipment Danny had provided they had nothing else to protect him with.
Not that Danny needed to know that Bruce and Tim were already working on something with the information he had provided behind the twins' backs.
Still this was the second time they got attacked now and all just because Danny had to deal with some nonsense the Observers had called him for. Yet Damian and Jason were sort of unable to help Danny right now and could only stir the Fenton Speeder to follow him, but the speeder wasn't fast enough and they lost sight of their ghost brother.
Frustrated Damian punched the consol.
"Now what?" Jason muttered, eyeing all the green and floating rocks around them. They didn't know how to navigate that place no matter how often they had accompanied Danny into this dimension. They were even more lost now and Danny was somewhere, hopefully still somewhat close, getting hunted by Damian's least favorite ghost rogue.
"I am going to skin this ghost and make him wish he never died in the first place, and you won't stop me Todd."
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kittievampire · 1 year
Note
So long/odd request but hear me out
Mc and Lucifer are in a sugar-rotting relationship and brothers and undatebles react
Lucifer spoils Mc so much like…mammon gets in trouble he gets hung from the ceiling Mc does the same thing they get away scot-free Satan has been begging for a cat for eons nope! but Mc wants one of course. He gets them tons of expensive gifts and if Mc ever wants something they only have to bat their eyes at him. It's not like Mc is using him though they dot on him a bunch too. And whenever they get in a fight loud moans are followed within a few minutes (if you know what I mean) but feel free to ignore 💙
I was in the middle of class when I read this and I was WHEEZING
I am a firm believer in Lucifer spoiling the MC rotten and leaving his brothers to fend for them damn selves but denying any sort of favoritism
I only did the brothers this time, I hope that's okay 😭😭😭
Sorry this took so fooking long to make 🥲
Lemme see what I have in my bag, my dear~
Click here if you wanna request!
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Warnings: Very suggestive, jealous bros lmao L
Enjoy.
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You and Lucifer had been dating for a few months now. Though, one would think you'd just gotten together with the way the two of you treated eachother. Or maybe that you were newlyweds in your honeymoon phase.
Lucifer treated you like a goddess. There was constant praise and worship, he'd drop everything if you asked, and he'd spoil you rotten with his love. You would return the favor, of course. Every now and then you'd surprise him with a new cursed vinyl, which he'd listen to all night if not spending it with you.
However, the brothers believe that you're getting totally unfair treatment.
Mammon
Baby boy was spending a lot more money than usual
He was playing a new gambling game he'd downloaded on his D.D.D.
When Lucifer got home, he immediately scolded the second-born for a solid 45 minutes
He announced that Mammon was on "lock-down" and wasn't allowed to ask anything of anyone, nor was he allowed to spend money
He was hung from the ceiling
And Goldie was taken away, too
Mammon was pissed the fuck off
So, when he noticed you were spending a lot more money, he did tease you for being greedy
"Oi, human, ain't splurgin' on shopping supposed to be mine and Asmo's thing? Lucifer's gonna be on yer ass if ya spend too much. Just be careful."
He says this and is genuinely a little worried that he'd see you hung from the ceiling as well
Lucifer confronts you about it in front of Mammon
"My Love, may I know why you've been spending so much grimm recently?"
First off, Mammon didn't like how he started that
How come you got that sweet conversation starter?
What he got was, "Mammon, what have you been wasting your money on this time?!"
Though, he still suspected it'd go downhill, and that he'd need to jump in to protect you at some point
"Oh, just some things... I can't tell you what they are, but I promise this is a rare occasion, Luci." You said, gifting him a kiss on his cheek
Lucifer smiled at you. "Alright, as long as you're being responsible, I trust you."
...
WHAT?!
"WHAT?!" Mammon shouted, earning a slight jolt from you and a look of annoyance from Lucifer
"What, Mammon?"
The Avatar of Greed froze. "I-I-! Y-You—" He paused before letting out a small groan
"Nevermind. Forget about it, yeah?"
Leviathan
Snekboi missed roughly a week of school and wasn't attending his online classes
He was grinding this new game he got so he could keep his spot as one of the top players!
He just couldn't afford to take his attention off of his D.D.D. for a second, the price would be too high!
Of course, Levi ended up being scolded by Lucifer
"Your priority must be your studies, Levi, do you intend on dragging Diavolo's name through the mud?"
How Diavolo was relevant was beyond him
But, Levi still had to sit through a lecture
He also got his D.D.D. taken away from him for a week
Not only did he lose top-spot, but he lost a majority of his self-esteem as well
So, he was obviously worried when you started skipping as well
"Uhh, MC, I'm not sure you should stay home today. Lucifer's not too kind to those who slack off."
But, his warnings fell upon deaf ears
You decided to take a few days off, deciding that you just really didn't feel like going to RAD
You woke up with a migraine one day, couldn't get sufficient sleep the other, and you just took another day to catch up on sleep and what work you had
Leviathan actually tried to stop Lucifer when he saw him outside of your room
"Lucifer, maybe they were feeling really bad or something, I don't think punishing them is a good idea, please show mercy! They're just a human!"
"Quit your whining, Levi. Or do you want to be given the Mammon treatment?"
This made Levi yelp and cower behind him, watching as Lucifer knocked on your door
You answered it, and Leviathan bit his nails nervously
"Hey, Luci," You said, greeting him with a small kiss to the cheek
"My Love," He started softly. "Are you feeling alright? You haven't been attending your classes. Is something wrong?" He asked, a hand reaching up to caress your cheek.
Error 404 not found
Leviathan.exe has stopped working
You smile sweetly. "I'm okay, Lucifer, I just really wasn't feeling up for RAD these past couple of days. It's nothing to worry about, promise!" You say, quite enthusiastically.
...
NANI THE FUCK?!
Levi SWORE you were about to get bodied
But, no
Lucifer just smiled, chuckled softly, and left with an "Alright, take care of yourself, Love."
Bullshit
You're fucking hacking
Satan
Satan wanted to bring a cat into the HoL
Lucifer reminded him of how he brought more cats than were allowed and "turned the House of Lamentation into the House of Cats"
Very fucking salty about it, but ultimately got over it (for the most part)
He saw you bring a little feline home and immediately rushed to your side to help you take care of it
It was a stray with a few wounds from other cats
He helped you bandage it and feed it, all the goods
"MC, I must warn you that Lucifer isn't exactly fond of pets... Let alone cats," Satan said, stern gaze meeting yours
You tilted your head in confusion. "Why is that?"
Satan was a bit hesitant to tell you, so he gave you the shortened and sweet version
"We had a bit of a cat problem a while back, he just really doesn't like cats. Dog people, am I right?" He scoffed
"Satan, what did I say about bringing in cats?"
Satan lowkey jumped a bit and turned his head
The fuck did he come from, bro is teleporting or some shit
You immediately hold the kitty close to your arms, looking up at Lucifer with doe eyes
"Luci, I'm sorry! I was the one who took in the cat, but he was hurt! Please, can we just keep it for a little while, at the very least?" You begged, the black cat in your arms meowing at Lucifer
Satan sighed. He was about to tell you that it was no use, that Lucifer couldn't be bought or reasoned with on this topic. That may have been his fault and he was sorry, but there was absolutely no way Lucifer would budge on this-
"Fine."
...
...
Um
What
Satan sat there dumbfoundedly before the two of you as you continued to converse, trying to process the events that had just taken place
Lucifer said yes
To you
For a cat?
Huh...
He was upset for a mere moment, but then a light bulb went off in his mind
Perhaps he could use this to an advantage
Satan's definitely going to try and get you to be a wild card whenever him and Belphie are pulling pranks on Lucifer
Just so the eldest will be a little more lenient
Now he knew Lucifer's weakspot
He found himself laughing maniacally in his mind as he realized just how much him and Belphegor could do with you as a cushion whenever they'd get in trouble
Asmodeus
"But, Lucifer, all of products in my favorite cosmetic brand are going on sale today! I have to get every single one of them or else I'll be..." Asmodeus gasped
"Trashy!!" He cried out, practically leeching off of Lucifer's arm as he continued to beg
"Asmodeus, no! You and Mammon are both on lockdown for the rest of the month! Now, get off of me!"
Lucifer managed to pry his younger brother off of him and slammed ether door shut to his office, leaving a near-on sobbing Asmodeus in the library
That's when he heard you
"Lucifer, must you always be so rough on your siblings?" He heard you ask, making him gasp and sigh dreamily. "Oh, darling, you always come to my rescue when I need it!" He said, his voice not loud enough to penetrate the door
"MC, I suggest staying out of my family matters. They have nothing to do with you."
Asmodeus could tell from the other side of the door that an argument was likely about to ensue
However, when the two of you started raising your voices, he could also sense some... Arousal?
"Oh!"
"Oh."
It wasn't long before he could hear your moans and whimpers from the other side of the door, lewd slapping noises making him step back a bit
Asmodeus couldn't help but giggle a little
He honestly didn't mind this as much as his brothers did, he found it really entertaining that the two of you endulged in his sin after such a heated argument
Asmodeus approves 👍💖
Beelzebub
Poor baby gets scolded so often for raiding the fridge, especially late at night
He's usually told to go to bed, and that these late-night trips to the fridge aren't good for him, all that
He couldn't help it, it was his sin! That was no fair!
Lucifer ended up putting him on lockdown after 11pm, meaning no trips outside of his room whatsoever
Beelzebub would usually try to get some snacks into his room before that time, but he usually ran out rather quickly and was left with a rumbling stomach
That's when you came in, holding two arm-fulls of snacks
Quietly, you pushed the door closed with your foot
You knew Belphegor was a heavy sleeper, but you still wanted to be quiet anyway, so as not to wake the Avatar of Sloth
You saw the gluttonous ginger perk up when he saw you
"MC?"
You smiled, dropping down the snacks before him
"Lucifer didn't say I couldn't raid the kitchen. I figured you'd be hungry, so I got you some snacks."
Bro bear-hugs you
He lowkey almost breaks your spine with how tight he holds you
"Thank you, MC! Can I call you sister, please? Get married to him quick so I can call you sister!"
You blushed at this comment, chuckling softly
"I'm working on it, I guess," You choked playfully, patting his back
"Beel, I need to breathe."
Not really all too jealous
A bit sad, but he gets over it when you bring him food
Lucifer never says anything about it tho when he finds out you're the one who's causing such a snack shortage
Belphegor
He was constantly scolded for pulling all kinds of pranks on Lucifer
There was that time he threw his D.D.D. in the trash, lit his coat on fire
All harmless things
So, when he catches you attaching a can of whipped cream to... Something in the fridge, he immediately raises a brow at you
"Hey, what are you doing?"
"Ahhh, just setting up a little surprise," You chuckled out
At first, he thinks it's for Beelzebub, but Asmodeus had taken him shopping with him earlier with the promise of free food afterward
"For..." Belphie trailed off, hearing footsteps nearing the kitchen
Immediately you close the fridge and take your seat in front of a plate of food you'd made yourself earlier. "Sit down," You whispered to the Avatar of Sloth
As he shuffled to a seat next to you, he realized what you were up to and put a hand over his mouth
Lucifer walked into the kitchen, greeting you and the youngest with a smile and a "Good morning."
You picked up a piece of the pancakes in front of you with a fork, putting it in your mouth and humming to yourself. "Luci? Could you pass me the butter?" You asked softly
Lucifer nodded, turning and opening the fridge
Immediately, whipped cream sprayed all over his face, some falling onto his chest
Belphegor bursted into a fit of laughter, immediately giving you a high-five and wiping a tear from his eye as he clutched his stomach
"Oh, that was good!" He choked out in between laughs
Lucifer turned to look at the youngest, wiping off a large portion of the whipped cream on his face
"Belphegor, did you do this?"
You snickered beside him, looking up at Lucifer
"I thought you'd like a snack, Luci~" You hummed out, giggling softly
Belphegor mentally prepared himself for a 45 minute lecture
There was a pause, making him shift a bit in his seat as his laughter died down
Suddenly, Lucifer began to laugh
It started out small
Then, his laughter boomed in the room, bouncing off of the walls
"Huh,"
This confused the fuck out of Belphie
Like, ummmm what
"You've gotten me, MC, well done. I needed that laugh." He said, walking over to you and wiping some whipped cream off of him, putting it on your nose
He dismissed himself, saying he was going to wash this off of him
Belphegor was silent for a moment
"Hm?"
"You get laughter and boops after pranks and I get lectures and scoldings... Favoritism at it's finest. The Anti-Lucifer League could make use of this."
He'd explain more, but he was getting too sleepy
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Shit was fun asf to write, thanks for requesting
I hope you enjoyed this, anon!
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