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#(I swear I’m not a nice guy enjoyer nobody is)
she-wolf09231982 · 3 months
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Chapter 7- Loss
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Summary: Easy Company is stuck in Bastogne and is succumbing to the cold harsh winter. Despite this, things are looking up! They are due to take the town of Foy and finally be done with the dreaded winter.  Easy returns to the front line in the forest just outside of Foy. You experience your first real loss due to a senseless accident. This sends you down spiraling into a dark place, and Joe is the only one that can pull you back. 
A/N: Mature audience, Joe LiebgottxFem!Medic, post D-Day, She/Her Pronouns, Y/F/N, Y/L/N, Cursing/Swearing, Derogatory Slurs, Mentions of death, Confrontation, Military Terminology, 1940’s slang, Inappropriate Nicknames, Band of Brothers References, Mentions of Weaponry, Yiddish to English Translation, Descriptive Wounds/Injuries, Blood/Gore, Smoking, Banter, Pining, Consensual Physical Contact/PDA, FOREVER FLUFF 💚 This chapter continues from
1x6 Bastogne then transitions into 1x7 The Breaking Point
*These stories may not fall entirely in accordance with the TV series timeline. I do not know the real soldiers the actors portray in this series, so please understand I show no disrespect. Some or most of historical events and character interactions in my fanfics are fabricated purely for the sake of the enjoyment of fiction*
~~~~~~~ 
Adrennes Forest, Belgium 
January 2, 1945 
Easy company combed through the trees of the forest in the relentless cold near the target town of Foy.
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Eventually, Easy encountered sporadic machine-gun fire causing a few casualties. After Hoobler’s kill shot of a German on horseback, he finally gets a Lugar and comes back to the guys to show it off to them.
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LT Compton and Lipton are having a chat about where LT Dike has disappeared to while Malarkey and Shifty are digging a foxhole nearby.  
“-I haven’t seen him all day. I didn't see him coming through the woods, and I have to figure out how we ended up with-” 
Lipton respectfully interrupted Buck, “-Two wounded.”  
“Who?” Buck asked concerned stopping in his tracks. 
“Brown and Stevenson.”  
 “Goddam it-” Buck looked away rolling his eyes, “Where’s Dike!? Where the hell does he ever go?”  
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“-I don’t know, but I wish he’d stay the hell there.”  You chime in approaching the first sergeant and LT. 
“Hey, Y/L/N.” Lipton greeted. 
“Would be nice if he took LT Shames with him, too-” Malarkey added. 
“-Shut up, guys.” Lip cautioned. 
“Shutting up, Sarge.” Malarkey acknowledged. 
You nod to Lip before addressing Buck, “Sir, Brown and Stevenson are stable. Me and Doc got them all patched up and ready for transport, they’re gonna be fine.” You report. 
Buck gave you an approving nod, obviously relieved. 
Suddenly a single gunshot sounded off too close for comfort and you all scrambled to the nearest half-dug foxhole with Malarkey, Shifty, Lip and Buck. 
“Patrol?” Malarkey asked. 
“No, we would’ve heard.” Lip replied. 
“One man...maybe a sniper.” Buck added. 
“That was no rifle.” Shifty confirmed. 
“What do you see, Shift?” Buck asked. 
“Nobody out there.” Shifty said. 
“Are you sure?” Buck questioned. 
“Uh-huh.” 
One of the guys came running up. “Ah Jesus, it’s Hoob! He’s shot!” He yelled out. 
“Sniper!?” Buck called back. 
“Nah, nah, he—he shot himself. MEDIC!”  
“Jesus Christ, I’m right here!” You shouted out over Lip’s shoulder as you leap out of the hole running. 
You get to Hoobler with Perconte kneeling over him. 
“It’s my fucking leg!” Hoobler cries out. 
“What happened!?” Lip asked. 
“What were you doing with a loaded gun in your pants!?” Buck asked Hoobler finding the Lugar next to him. 
“It just went off! I wasn’t touchin’ it or nothin’! I wasn’t touchin’ it, I swear!” Hoobler responded panicked. 
“Hoob, hold still dammit, I gotta cut the pants!” you bellowed at him as calmly as your voice allowed.  
You lift the fabric away from Hoobler’s skin where blood soaked through his right thigh and began feverishly slicing through his uniform. It was clear by the color and saturation of the blood that he hit the main artery. 
“It hurts like a son of a bitch!” Hoobler shrieked. 
“We gotta pack this to make it stop.” you think outloud more so to yourself.  
You pull off his belt in one fleeting motion and apply it above the wound as a tourniquet and start tightening it. Hoobler lets out a cry of pain and starts rocking side to side. 
“Goddam it, hold him down! I can’t get this tight enough to stop the bleeding if he’s moving around like that!” you tell the other five men present. 
You secure the belt, then dump your bag to get the sulfur and clean gauze to start packing the bullet wound. 
“Keep him warm!” you tell them as you dash the sulfur onto the thigh and start stuffing with the dressing. 
Doc rushed in sliding onto his knees next to you. 
“Let me see it.” Doc said pushing Malarkey aside, “Y/L/N, let me get in there so I can get the bullet out.” he said noticing you were becoming fatigued. 
Doc shifted over and started working Hoobler. Buck removed his coat and put it across Hoobler to keep him warm. 
The guys started talking to him to keep him from passing out. 
“How we doin’, Doc!?” Buck asked nervously. 
“I can’t see a thing. We gotta get him back to an aid station.” Doc stated. 
“Well let’s get ready to move him then!” you say with your voice shakier than you had intended. 
Doc still frantically working on the leg, the rest of the boys suddenly fell silent. 
“-Doc...Doc!” Buck barked. 
Eugene looked up to see Hoobler laying lifeless.
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Lip and Doc stare in horror panting, trying to catch their breath. You stand over all of them with a blank stare, lost in your own thoughts over what had just occurred.  
“Dead...all because of his ‘treasured’ fucking Lugar...’” you thought to yourself. 
This revelation made you angry. Your emotions began to boil over as you voiced your recent thoughts outwardly. 
“All because of a precious Lugar!” you roared.  
The six men look at you startled. You met their shocked gazes with your eyes filled to the brim with tears. As they start to spill over, you continue. 
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“Didn’t even need a fuckin’ Kraut to do it for him, did he!?” Your voice cracks as you ask them rhetorically, gesturing towards Hoobler. 
The men all look down at the expired soldier. 
You inhale loudly, tilting your head back and sniffling to try to keep the discharge from expelling from your nose. (Not very lady like). 
“Malarkey,” you say sharply in a motherly tone, side eyeing him.  
Don snaps his head up to look at you, jaw slightly slacked waiting for you to speak, “-if I fucking catch you risking your life looking for a Lugar after today, I will shoot you myself.” you stated harshly. 
Don nodded and looked back down as you turned on your heel and stormed off. 
~~~~~~~ 
Later, Lipton found you spaced out in a foxhole by yourself. He approached cautiously, recognizing the distant look on your face and not wanting to spook you. You sensed his presence and looked over at him with emptiness in your eyes. 
“Hey, Y/F/N.” he began. Your face remains as you looked straight ahead again. 
Lip sat on the edge of your foxhole, allowing his feet to dangle inside. 
“You ok?” His voice was gentle and worried. 
You only nod. 
“Listen, uh, when you’re ready, I need you to come with me to Captain Winters to explain what happened. Just, whenever you’re ready, k?” he waited, “You know where to find me.”  
It was only until he started to walk away you found whatever voice you had left. 
“Sarge, we can go now.” you call out as you slowly make your way out of the hole. 
As you stand before Winters and Nixon retelling the story, your voice begins to strain fighting back anger and choking down tears.  
“Hoob had so many layers on him we couldn’t tell how bad the bleeding was, sir.” you pause and look down at your boots, “He was already gone by the time we got him to the aid station. The bullet went through the artery.” you finished. 
“It wouldn’t have made a difference if you had known.” Nixon tried to assure. 
You look at him perplexed; your face twisted up with that same rage beginning to rise in your chest. 
“With all due respect, that’s where you’re wrong, sir.” you raise your voice, still trying to maintain your customs and courtesies towards him. 
Winters, Nixon and Lipton shared wide eyed glances. 
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“Y/F/N, maybe you should-” Lip began. 
“-No! This was avoidable. If Hoobler hadn’t had that Lugar, he’d be alive now!” you stated bitterly. The men were speechless as you continued 
“I hear the guys go around talking about what fucking trophies they’re going to bring home from this ‘Kraut’ or that ‘Jerry,’ and you know what, sir? It makes me sick to my stomach! Do you know Perconte hasover a dozen wrist watches from dead German soldiers he’s been collecting since Normandy!? At least!” you pause to look away, to shield the view of your tears. 
You release along sigh, “And now, because of a stupid German handgun that he considered a “trophy” is the reason that Hoobler is dead. No trophy or treasure is worth that.” you concluded shaking your head.  
You look back at the three men with your glossed over eyes, waiting for a tentative punishment for not asking for permission to speak freely before going off. 
Winters, Nixon and Lipton exchanged concerned glances. 
“Y/F/N,” Winters approached you, “I’ve been noticing for awhile that the weight of the war has been anchoring you down. It gets to all of us at some point, so it’s fine to get it off your chest. As long as you keep pushing forward and lean on the guys for support.”  
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“Just make sure when you lose it that it’s only with us. I don’t think Sinks would put up with that.” Nixon joked. 
You scoffed flashing a weak smile at him. 
“You’re doing good work with us. Nobody has any complaints.” Winters added. 
You nod, “Thank you, sir, that means a lot coming from you.” you replied. 
“In the meantime, go find Liebgott and stay with him until you’re smiling again. That kid always has something to say that makes the guys laugh.” Nixon said with a wink. 
“Yes, sir.” you respond with a slight grin before leaving the three men under the tarp overhang. 
~~~~~~~ 
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You didn’t go to Joe, though. You went back to your foxhole to be alone. As the sun was setting, the air became chillier, and you found yourself uncontrollably shivering. You started to regret not finding Joe to get some extra warmth from him in his foxhole.
And as if he heard you thinking about him, Joe appears crouching over your foxhole. He remained quiet for a minute to see if it was safe to join you, but you keep your face buried in your folded arms covered by your wool blanket. Joe thought he heard you either whimpering or crying, but as he leaned in closer, he discovered you were actually humming a song to yourself.  
“Hey.” Joe said softly. 
You look up at him with tired blood shot eyes, red nose and peeling chapped lips. You had been crying silently in that hole all afternoon and you knew Joe would know. You attempt a weak smile then rest your chin on your knees.  
Joe hopped in and plopped down next to you. He studied you for a few seconds then nudged you with his elbow. You side eye him without any additional response. 
“I just talked to Lip-” he began.  
You looked down. 
“-He asked me if you had come to see me. Had to tell him no. He told me what happened, and that Nixon told you to come see me.” he continued. 
You remained quiet, shifting from your chin to your cheek looking away from Joe.  
Liebgott moved closer to you putting his arm across your shoulders. His closeness made you tremble. You wanted to lean into his chest to get warm, but you stayed put. 
Joe tilted his head, “Why didn’t you come to me, Gams?” he asked, almost sounding offended. 
His fingers gently gliding back and forth on your shoulder, he anxiously waits for you to answer him.  
“I-I don’t know...” you muttered as you sniffled. 
Joe reached for your shoulders to turn you towards him. You rotate entirely around as his hands guided your face to his. You finally look at him with tears cascading down your cheeks. Sensing how distraught you still were, he pulled you into him, embracing you tightly as he leaned against the dirt wall. You curl into him resting your head right over his chest. 
“I gotchyu, doll-” he reassured then kissed the top of your head. “I’m right here.” 
Joe held you, allowing you to soak his coat with your tears while you silently bawled as you wrap your arms around his torso, holding him like a lifeline. He didn’t know what else he could possibly do for you, so he occasionally planted a kiss on the side or top of your head while kneading your back or arms to give you any sort of relief. 
This lasted for awhile until you were drained of tears to shed. You shifted upward to lay your head into the crook of Joe’s neck to be as close to him as possible. 
“So,” Joe started, “did you really tell Malark that you’d shoot him?” he asked. 
For the first time all day, you laughed. Your laughter is music to Joe’s ears as he embraces you tighter then kisses your forehead. 
“I sure did.” you respond, your voice raspy and strained since you hardly said a complete sentence for hours. 
“Pretty sure you scared him out of looking for that Lugar for his nephew.” Joe stated. 
“Good.” you responded. 
He rested his chin on top of your head. 
“What were you singin’ anyway?” he asked. 
You sighed, “Tu-ra-loo-ra-loo-ral.”  
“Tu ra what?” Joe laughed trying to look at you. 
You giggle, “By Bing Crosby? From the movie ‘Going My Way?’ You don’t know it?”  
“Ah sure, I think I’ve heard it once or twice-” he responded while pulling you in closer, “-maybe you can refresh my memory?” he added. 
“I don’t know, Joe, my voice is shit right now from crying.”  
“Sing quietly then. Come on, for me?” he urged winking at you. 
You couldn’t resist the man. You obliged him with a gentle grin. 
🎶“Tu-ra-loo-ra-loo-ral-” you began subtly, “Tu-ra-loo-ra-li...”🎶  
You softly serenade Joe the Irish lullaby until you drift off to sleep in his arms. He stayed with you overnight in your foxhole. His steady heartbeat and rhythmic breathing soothed your inner turmoil, allowing you the deepest sleep you’ve had in months. 
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You wake up sometime in the middle of the night, looking up to see Joe knocked out still holding onto you as he was before you fell asleep on him. 
You move your head up and press your lips into his neck, gently placing a kiss right over the scar left behind from the wound at crossroads. He shuddered, then woke up alarmed, looking at you with hooded droopy eyes. 
“Heeeeey now, Gams-” he cautioned flashing a half-concerned expression. “Whaddya tryin’ to do?” he said through a yawn with a nervous laugh while rubbing his neck where you had kissed him. 
“What?” you respond partially entertained by his reaction. 
He looked at you skeptically, “Come on, you know whatchyu did.” he rebuked, taking an opportunity to stretch. 
You shrug at him with a coy smirk. He smiled at you cynically.  
“You keep doing that shit and we’re going to have to find something to cover this foxhole, so nobody sees what I’d like to do you.” he stated, his voice gravelly and low.  
You gasp as you back off him, “Joseph Liebgott!”  
He chuckled, “Just giving you a fair warning, sweetheart. Don’t think I won’t.” he replied with a wink. 
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You felt a wave of heat rush over your entire body as you stared at him in shock by his honesty. 
You scoffed, “Noted. I’ll be more mindful where and when I put my kisses.”  
“Mm-hm...” Joe hummed side eyeing you suspiciously. 
You feel yourself blush as you bashfully smile back at him. He pulled you back onto him. 
“Go back to sleep you little tsrus (troublemaker).” he whispered in Yiddish, then kissed your forehead.  
~~~~~~~ 
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lovetorn · 3 years
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all for the game [dream]
Exy player!Dream x Reader
summary: dream runs into trouble when the florida falcons play the edgar allan ravens.
w/c: 3.4k+ :D
warnings: violence, blood, swearing, ha typical exy shit
a/n: an au based on my favourite book trilogy, all for the game. idea by 🍀 anon <3 i wrote this for my own enjoyment AHHAHAAH. if u don’t understand the rules etc of exy, it’s basically hockey, soccer and lacrosse meshed together, but if u have any questions, send me an ask!
Exy is a bastard sport, an evolved sort of lacrosse with the violence of ice hockey. Dream loves every aspect of it. It is vastly different from the usual college football, and it certainly gives you more bruises. Maybe a little too many more bruises. Played in a stadium, on a soccer-sized basketball court with plexiglass to protect the crowd, it brings Dream immense joy.
Scooping the ball into the net of his racket, Dream looks at the wall before he uses his body to launch the ball towards it. The ball is quick to bounce back and plop into Dream’s net. He adjusts his grip on the stick and tilts his head, deciding where his next shot should be.
“Dream?” The dirty blonde turns around and sees you push through the plexiglass door that leads onto the court. “Hey!”
Dream smiles from under his helmet. “Hi, Y/n!” You don't play Exy, choosing to watch your best friend from the sidelines instead. He grips the grate of his helmet and slides his head out of it, his hair sticking up in every direction. “What are you doing here?”
You throw your arms up. “Coming to see you practice the great sport that is Exy,” You laugh before spinning around and looking up at the highest seats of the stadium. “Haven’t broken a bone yet, I assume?” This made Dream laugh.
“No, not yet. Saving that for the game against the Ravens.”
Dream’s determination for Exy scared you a little bit—it was almost like he wanted to get hurt. “Easy, tiger. We all know what happened last time we played them. Never again, please,” You shake your head, walking closer to him. The last time the Florida Falcons played the West Virginia Edgar Allan Ravens, Dream got a concussion so bad he couldn’t walk for a few days. You had sworn they would pay for their damage, but Dream went against you.
Dream rolls his eyes, lightheartedly. “That’s the way the game goes, Y/n. No way you can stop it,” he said that back then, too. You throw him a glare before taking the racket out of his hand to gain his full attention.
“Just, please be careful.” You practically beg. Dream’s eyebrows raise slightly, surprised. He didn’t see that coming.
“Yeah, always,” He follows your eyes as they trace the scar that runs from his temple to the middle of his forehead. You sigh and pass his racket back to him.
The dark purple Edgar Allan Ravens bus pulls into the Falcon’s home stadium car park that Friday night. Fans from all over the state and West Virginia crowd the entrances and surprisingly, there are a lot more supporters in purple and black than green and white.
Dream looks down at his forest green Exy uniform and smooths out his jersey. He rolls his neck in a circle to release the building tension. A hand clamps down on his shoulder as Dream slips his hands into his green and white gloves.
“You’re gonna be fine, dude. We all are,” Sapnap says, although Dream can hear the waver in his voice. Dream shakes his head and Sapnap inhales sharply.
“Nah, we won’t be.”
Sapnap slides his hand off of Dream’s shoulder and turns around, probably going to the bathroom to calm his crippling trepidation. The locker room is silent as the team moves around, changing and preparing themselves for the game ahead. Dream tries not to think about the team on the other side of the stadium, who are most likely already warming up despite the game starting in an hour.
Dream opens his locker and fumbles around for his phone. He needs to know that you’re here. Opening his messages, he’s frozen from the notifications coming through.
I hope your little friend prayed for you last night.
You got lucky with that concussion. Take this as a warning.
Dream’s fingertips trail up to hover above the scar on his forehead. He clenches his fist and throws his phone back into the locker, not flinching when the dark green metal dents. Dream leans his head against his forearm that rests on the locker.
“Dream! Dude, calm down,” A voice calls from across the room. Footsteps come up behind him and Dream has to stop the tears collecting on his waterline. “It’ll be fine, Coach said he might put you on for one half.”
George’s comments do nothing to soothe Dream’s anxiety. Dream has told nobody about the threats he’s been getting for a few days leading up to this game. If he told you, he wouldn’t even be here. You.
Dream ducks down to find his phone. George furrows his eyebrows as he watches. “Wha—?”
Grasping his phone, Dream then stalks out of the locker room. He walks down the hallway towards the inner court, presses your phone number on his now-smashed phone, and brings it to his ear. Pick up, pick up. “Dream?”
The sound of your voice makes Dream exhale deeply. “Where are you?” He asks desperately.
Dream can hear the crowd chattering through the phone as he scans over the stadium trying to find you.
“Uh, section 4, row 38, where I am every home game. Why? Is everything okay?” The worry in your voice is evident and it fails to calm Dream down like he thought it would. And when he sees waves of purple instead of green, his anxiety grows.
“I—Y/n. I need to see you, I don’t—I can’t,” Dream screws his eyes shut and tries to breathe through his nose slowly.
“Dream, I’m coming. I can see you in the inner court. Stay there.”
Y/n hangs up after that and Dream looks at his phone.
Scared? A text says from an unknown number.
Dream presses his tongue into the inside of his cheek and blinks a few times. A knock on the plexiglass behind him startles Dream. He turns and sees you smiling. He lifts his hand in a small wave and you do the same, laughing at him. At least he has a way to take his mind off of the shit with the Ravens.
A bell signals the start of the line-up announcements and Dream throws his thumb over his shoulder. You nod, understandingly, and blow him a kiss. Dream smiles shyly, his cheeks growing pink before he turns to leave.
You make your way back up to your seat, your legs bouncing in anticipation as the Ravens walk on the court one by one while the announcer calls the line-up. Once the Ravens are in a line on the halfway line, the Falcons are announced.
Since teams are co-ed, the variances in heights differ greatly. The Ravens are much taller than a majority of the Falcons, which gives them an advantage, to an extent. Dream had told you that being shorter allows you to move around the court with more agility, but being 6’2’’, Dream chose to be a striker instead of a dealer or a backliner.
“Number 2, Dream Tucker.”
At the sound of your best friend’s name, you stand and cheer, earning a few dirty looks from Ravens fans. As the remainder of the team is announced, you grow more nervous than you thought possible. A warning buzzer sounds and both teams go back to their benches.
“Alright, guys, this is our biggest game of the season, again. The last game against these idiots wasn’t ideal, but don’t let that deter you from doing your best tonight. That goes for you too, Dream," Coach looks towards Dream and he nods. Dream draws his bottom lip between his teeth from under his helmet and looks down at the ground. Sapnap’s hand slaps Dream's back in support and then the rest of the team is in agreement.
At his teammates’ words, Dream huffs. He can do this. The starting team goes onto the court, the doors closing behind them with a thump and then the scrape of a lock.
Dream sits on the bench next to Punz and Liliana. They hear the buzzer go off again and then watch as Sapnap flicks the ball into the air and slams it with his racket. There’s a distinctive crack as both teams race off their lines to find their preferred place on the court along with the players they need to mark. Three bodies crash into each other and the ball pops out on the other side, rolling silently.
At the sight of violence, the stadium roars. A Ravens backliner throws the ball and it hits the plexiglass in front of Dream who jumps in surprise. The ball is picked up off the floor by another Ravens player. He throws it to a girl who is running across the court and it lands perfectly into her net. Dream sees Tegan bodyslam the girl into the wall, the glass shuddering under their weight and Sapnap throws his hand up in a thumbs-up at Tegan, who smiles under her helmet.
The ball sails high in the air and players push and shove each other under it. As it comes down, George gets pushed to the floor, skidding to a stop a few feet away. The Ravens striker looks George dead in the eye and smirks as he catches the ball. He then tosses it powerfully towards the home court goal and the Falcons' goalie, Gabby, hits it up the court and away from herself. Dream, Punz and Liliana cheer from their spots on the subs bench.
“Nice one, Gabs! Falcons down the court!” Coach yells through the plexiglass.
Dream wears a smile when he turns back to look at you. You grin back, give him a thumbs-up, and nod. That’s when Dream knows he’s ready.
But, ten minutes into the game, the Ravens break the Falcons defensive line. The ball slips through the gap between Gabby’s torso and racket and lands in the back of the net, the siren above the goal going red and blaring a high-pitched sound. The Ravens don’t hug or cheer and return to their places on the court. Their fans, however, throw insults and middle fingers up at the Falcons while screaming and hollering.
“Fuck’s sake,” Dream mumbles. Punz slaps his pair of gloves against the bench and Liliana shakes her head.
The game went on like this for the rest of the half—the Ravens scoring 6 more goals, the Falcons scoring none. At half-time, Sapnap throws his helmet on the floor of the locker room.
“I fucking hate these guys,” He curses, pacing around the room. Coach sits on a chair, his elbows on his knees.
“We all do, but complaining about it isn’t going to help us win,’ Dream says. “Coach put me on.”
Coach looks at Dream for a moment. The tension in the room is thick and Dream knows he’s pushing his luck by asking. Nonetheless, Coach sighs before nodding stiffly.
“Dream goes on for Peter, Punz on for Drew, Liliana on for Tegan.”
And so it’s decided. Dream’s thumbs fly across his screen as he texts you. You pull your phone out of your pocket at the sound of your text tone and see the message. I’m on.
You smirk softly at it and message him back before you tuck your phone back into your pocket. The warning buzzer sounds and then both teams are back on the court: the Ravens with a whole new line-up and the Falcons with their three new subs.
Dream’s heart pounds in his chest, sending shuddery heat through every inch of his body. He holds his breath in anticipation for the serve, and then it starts. The Ravens are clearly a lot more experienced than the Falcons, but that doesn’t stop the team in green from giving everything they’ve got.
The ball hits the far wall and comes soaring back, thanks to the Ravens goalie. Dream jumps to catch it before it can fly over his head and it lands safely in the soft net of his striker racket. He looks around for opponents and takes 7 steps of his allowed 10, and passes it to George who is open further down the court. George catches the ball, then twists and passes the ball across to Punz. His mark collides with him a moment later and George goes sliding, his arm out with his racket to help him balance. Punz runs down the court, stops, then throws the ball to Liliana. His mark slams his racket down violently on Punz’s in retaliation. The backliner shakes his head in annoyance and continues running.
Dream is already near the goal by the time it gets to him again. He gets the ball and only has two steps to aim and shoot before a Ravens player crashes into him. Dream hits the ground so hard, he rolls. But, the crowd holds their breath as they watch the ball sail past the goalie and into the back of the net. The siren glows red and all Dream can hear is his ears ringing. Sapnap runs up to Dream and helps him up, congratulating him in the process. Dream looks around confused before realising he scored a goal. The entire team rushes towards him, cheering and laughing.
“Good job, Dream! Let’s do that again!” Coach yells. Dream’s surprised he can hear him over the crowd.
The game starts again with Falcons serve. The Falcons’ are fired up and back in the game, even if it is 6-1. And as soon as George throws Dream the ball, he dodges his mark and flies up the court, unguarded and ready to score again. The Ravens’ goalie isn’t prepared for Dream’s throw and misses the ball as it’s thrown at him, making the score 6-2. The crowd gets impossibly louder and Dream looks up into the sea of people to spot you. The smile on your face gives Dream newfound confidence and then everybody is back at their starting positions.
The Ravens are angry, there’s no doubt about that. Sapnap gives the striker a boyish smirk and a snide comment, which Dream can’t hear. He guesses it pisses them off because the second the ball is thrown from the Ravens dealer, the striker goes straight for Sapnap. The younger boy is thrown against the wall of the court and continues to spit insults at the Ravens player, despite his situation.
“Sapnap! Get out of there, bro!” Punz yells, collecting the ball from the ground and throwing it back to Gabby to hit up the court. Sapnap laughs and shakes his head, his lips still moving. Dream sees, out of the corner of his eye, the Ravens player drawing his fist back before punching Sapnap in the nose. The Falcons fans in the crowd start booing at the unnecessary violence and the referees unlock the doors to intervene. Dream meets Sapnap’s eye and raises his eyebrows when he sees Sapnap laughing, blood dripping into his mouth and coating his teeth. The referees pull the Ravens striker off of Sapnap and give him a red card for throwing the first punch. The Ravens fans boo and start swearing at the referees, but their cries are drowned out by the sound of the home crowd.
Due to the incident, the teams are to go back to their positions to start the serve again. Now that the Ravens are down a player, Dream knows the ways to get around them, especially when Sapnap is unguarded.
“Dream!” Sapnap calls when Dream catches the ball. He spins around a little too quickly, loses his balance slightly but throws the ball anyway. As he watches it fly across the court, Dream feels his entire body get crushed against the wall of the court. His head rebounds off the wall from the impact. There’s a heavy weight that pushes him into it more and he can’t breathe. Dream flails his arms, drops his racket, and attempts to push the Ravens player off of him. There’s no doubt that Dream hit his head again. He knows he did. A helmet can only do so much.
Dream can only hear ringing in his ears as he feels the Raven get pulled off—and it isn't the same ringing he heard when he scored the Falcons first goal. He tries to scramble to his feet before he crumples to the ground. Dream blinks a few times, disorientated, but still fails to gain a conscious mind. His eyes start to close when he feels his helmet being tugged off and then someone’s slapping his cheeks. “Stay awake, Dream.”
Dream can barely hear the sound of someone slamming their fists against the plexiglass behind him and then the person in front of him nods. He thinks it’s Sapnap. “Come on, bro, it’s only a few steps and then you can lie down.”
Dream’s head lols to the side, eyes half-open and a lazy grin on his mouth. “Sappy,” he slurs. Sapnap lets out a laugh for the first time since his best friend got knocked out and smiles at him.
“Yeah, dude, it’s me. We’re gonna get you fixed up, okay?” Dream nods before he closes his eyes. “No, no, Coach!” The world fades out around him and Dream falls unconscious.
The light is so bright above him. Dream closes his eyes again after he opens them and groans softly. The sound is almost too quiet for you to hear, but you do. And when you do, you lift your head from where you were resting on the edge of his bed. The chair you are sitting in is uncomfortable, so when you stand up, your muscles ache. “Hey, baby, how do you feel?”
If Dream was fully conscious, he would have blushed immensely at the sound of the pet name, but for the moment, he feels like he’s in a dream. His mouth is dry and he struggles to keep his eyes open for longer than 3 seconds. “You don’t have to talk, it’s okay.”
Dream feels pressure on his hand and moves his head slightly to see that your fingers are wrapped around his. You hear him murmur something, and lean down.
“Hi,” He whispers. You furrow your eyebrows at his greeting and look him in the eyes.
“That’s all I get? Hi?” You let out a breathy laugh and use your other hand to brush his hair away from his forehead. But, Dream can’t feel you on his skin. He hesitantly lifts his other hand to touch his forehead and feels a bandage.
“Surprise! Another scar,” You joke. Although, Dream can hear the edge to your words. Your smile disappears from your lips and then you sigh. Your eyes scan over Dream’s face, noting the dull green of his eyes and the pale of his skin. “Oh, Dream. I was so worried about you.”
Dream opens his eyes from when they had fallen closed again and sees the silent tears dripping down your cheeks. “It’s okay, I’m here, I’m fine,” His voice is scratchy and the sound of the word ‘fine’ does not sound fine. You smile sadly at him, then huff, wiping at your face.
“I almost forgot…” You trail off, rounding the bed to the other side to pick up a bowl and a cotton ball. You sit on the edge of the bed and dip the cotton into the antiseptic. You turn Dream’s head slowly to get a better look at the cut on his cheek. You drag the medicine over the gash and watch as Dream doesn’t flinch.
Once you are done, you place both of the things on the side table of the medical bay in the Falcons home stadium and look at Dream. He gives you a lazy smile and his fingers twitch against yours. “Thank you.”
You nod, eyes wide. “Of course, you know I’ll always be here to clean you up.”
Dream can feel his skin heating up. You get a concerned look on your face when you see the rise in pink on his cheeks. “Oh my god, are you heating up? Do you have a fever?”
He wants to laugh so badly. “Y/n, I’m okay. It’s not a fever. I’m blushing,” Dream says bashfully.
You realise why and then grow embarrassed. “Oh.”
The air isn’t tense, but there’s something there and you want to stick around to find out what it is.
Feedback is always appreciated xx
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marvelettesassemble · 3 years
Text
Safe House (Bill x F Reader)
Summary: When his family has to go in hiding Bill asks you – his coworker and spy for the Order - if they could stay at your safe house.
Warnings: Reader has problems with sleeping and feels lonely, small swear words, mentions of sex
Words: ~3.9k
A/N: I wanted to write a Bill story for a while, because there isn’t enough stuff about him. But this took me 3 weeks I think and I struggled. But its finished now and hopefully the next one will be better  
You looked up from the little box in front of you after you had inspected the bruise-healing paste for a long time.
“Long time no see,” the tall guy in front of you said with a smirk on his face that you had almost forgotten existed.
“Weasley, what are you doing here? Last time I heard you were still in Egypt,” you sounded surprised.
“It was time to calm down a little bit and to stay closer to my family. I think I need a break from curse breaking and I’m currently on desk duty here in London.”
“So, you’re getting old. Maybe this paste would have helped you,” you tapped your finger on the box that you still had in your hand before you put it back in the stand. “We have to meet up for coffee sometime to see which one of us has the better stories to tell. See you around, Weasley.” You nodded at him before you left the shop owned by the twins of the person you just spoke to.
Back in the shop Bill Weasley picked up the exact box you had just put down and went to the register to pay for it. He was greeted by his brother George who told him he didn’t have to pay for it, he still had some paste in his office that he could have. “No, I want this one. It’s a gift, but if you’ll give it to me for free, I won't say no.” He winked at his younger brother and left the shop and disapparated. When he was at the burrow he opened the box and pulled out the paper you had put in there.
Your last stay had been in Spain and he was glad that he had recruited you for the Order as you were the perfect spy. Nobody suspected anything when you travelled in particular places or asked specific questions with you being a curse breaker just like him, but it could be described as kind of a freelancer. You didn’t stay at one place, which makes it even more perfect. He sighed and had to stop reading your neat handwriting as he was missing his old job.  
While he stayed in Egypt and was busy getting from one tomb to another you had stayed at your family home in England. You started your research from home and when you had enough information or needed to gather information you travelled for a few weeks, maybe a month but not more than two and you always had your home back in Great Britain where you would come back to.
Him meeting you in public and making it seem like you haven’t seen each other for a while had been your idea. Owls had a tendency to get lost in these times and this was the safest way they had so far. His heart felt a bit heavy as he thought back to the times when he had to shield his eyes from the sun and he though his body couldn’t produce anymore sweat, but the excitement flowing through his veins when he thought of the unknown which laid in front of him. He missed those times when he could forget everything around him and just had to concentrate on the mission in front of him.
Long gone were these times, but when he looked at the watch in the corner and saw the faces of his siblings, he knew he had made the right decision. What was a little bit of freedom and excitement when he now had the chance to make sure his siblings were okay? No, he had definitely made the right decision!
He went back to reading your letter and noticed on the bottom of the parchment a code. You would meet him tonight and the letters told him where exactly.
“Hey carrot head,” you smiled brightly at him when he walked towards you. “I brought you something, I hope this will help your mom stuffing your mouth,” you nodded towards the big basket which stood next to your feet and was filled with carrots.
“Not my favourite,” he mumbled and sat down next to you. As it was getting dark he couldn’t really see you.
“What would please you more? Beans? Potatoes?”
“I loved mashed potatoes,” Bill admitted and he though he saw you nodding.
“Noted. Next time I’ll bring potatoes.”
“Why are you bringing vegetables?” He asked confused until you told you him you had a big garden. Your grandpa had taken a liking to growing vegetables and you had taken over and never really let go. Your sleeping schedule was a mess and so you enjoyed tending to your plants when sleep wouldn’t come. It was way too much for you, but you liked the work and you know the Weasleys were a big family.  
“How come I don’t know where you live?” he wondered suddenly.
“Because it is a secret,” you whispered and then you started giggling. “And now to the important stuff, we don’t have all night.”
You noticed Bill playing with his earring. It was a reminder of his first job in Egypt and he refused to get rid of it despite everything his mother said. You had noticed that he started doing that when he was nervous. “What’s on your mind?” you finally asked when you almost got bored of watching him – almost.
“I might have to ask a favour of you,” he started but stopped.  
“Okay, just ask. I do have the option of refusing, right?” you laughed but Bill didn’t join you. He was just so nervous. A few months had passed since you had brought him the carrots.  
“There is a slight chance that the order is being compromised and if the headquarter falls... the burrow isn’t safe everyone knows where we live... I guess what I’m trying to ask is if you’d let my family into your home. I know it has been a safe house for decades, but I don’t really know how to make it and I fear I don’t have the time to learn it.”
You were quiet for a while. “Okay, but I’ll only let your family in, no one else. Bill, you have to promise me, no one else!” You put pressure on the last words, but you noticed that the man in front of you was relieved. He stopped playing with his earring and instead he hugged you. He caught you by surprise but then your arms sneaked around his torso.
“Thank you,” he mumbled and you felt how relieved he was.  
The Order had taken many setbacks but the latest one was the death of Albus Dumbledore. You didn’t really know what or when it happened, you were on your own mission. So, when you came back to the Burrow and the first person you saw was Bill with scars on his face you were shocked, but it also made you realise that you didn’t have time anymore.  
“Is it okay, if I touch your face?” you asked hesitantly. He nodded slowly and you took the seat next to him. Both of you stared in each other's eyes and you carefully put your hands on each cheek. You felt the rough skin beneath your fingertips, then closed your eyes and told Bill to do the same. You then thought about your home, the house and the fields, the massive garden and the small greenhouse, the little lake next to it and pushed that image towards Bill. You opened your eyes again.
“When it’s time you have to take your family and come there. It doesn’t matter when, you can apparate there now. Anytime, okay? I know I said only your family, but now that I know everyone my invitation also includes Harry and Hermione. You can gather them and come even now, but please don’t wait until it's too late,” you begged.
You had met the rest of the Weasleys at the Headquarter and you were surprised how nice and welcoming they were. The whole family risked so much for doing the right thing and protecting Harry, there was no way that you wouldn’t welcome them into your home.
“Now that that is out of the way you have to tell me how that happened,” your fingertips fluttered over the uneven part of his face.
Was there someone knocking? No one knew where your house was unless... You jumped up from the chair and placed the book hastily on the table. You were wide awake now and grabbed your wand and opened the door. The people in front of you didn’t look much better than you considering it was night time and they stood in their pyjamas in front of you.
“Come in,” you said and opened the door to let them all in. Bill entered first, followed by Molly who thanked you and Arthur who hugged you and didn’t stop thanking you either, then Harry, Ron, Hermoine and Ginny and then the twins. “Do you want tea?”
You agreed to have tea before everyone would head to bed and while you prepared the drink Bill filled you in. The ministry had fallen and they got a note from Kingsley so they fled and came right to your door. Your house wasn’t small by any chance but with that many people they had to share some rooms.
The next day three people were missing. Harry, Ron and Hermione had disappeared during the night and only left a little note to tell you all not to worry. This didn’t really ease anyone minds, but no one was really surprised. Everyone had a different way to deal with the stress. Yours was your garden that you tended to when you weren’t discussing your next moves.  
You were currently in the green house tending to the tomatoes when the red head with the long hair joined you. “I have to leave soon. We need some supplies and I have to get some information. But I can’t leave when I’m the only secret keeper, so I’m still doing research how to get another secret keeper.” you informed him when he grabbed himself some gloves and pulled them on. They were too little for his big hands but he didn’t seem to mind.
“Are you sure you want to go? We don’t know how safe it is,” he admitted and pulled some we weed from the soil.
“I’m a big girl, I can look after myself,” you said with more confidence than you actually had. “Will you help me with my research?” You spent an hour together in the green house, sharing stories from your curse breaking days before you made your way inside to start your research. Arthur joined you and you spent the day between books before Molly called you for dinner.
Despite everything that was going on it was an enjoyable dinner. Molly had made a soup from the vegetables from your garden and the twins did most of the talking. You continued the research after your meal and you noticed how your eyes started to get heavy when Arthur announced he found something.  
Bill and you walked over to him and after a short discussion you were sure that he had found what you were searching.  “So, you’re going to tell me that Bill would have been the next secret keeper as I’ve already showed him how to get here and we spent the whole day searching for nothing?” you asked not really believing what you had just learned. It was that easy?
“Well, I guess that I’ll go tomorrow. Maybe you should write me a note what you need so I can get that,” you said still buffed. You said goodnight soon and left the two Weasleys in the room to make your way to the bed.
“Did she just made me the second secret keeper without knowing it?” Bill said when it was just him and his father.
“Don’t worry, I don’t think she is mad. She wanted to do it and she’s just exhausted, poor girl isn’t really sleeping. I hope she gets enough rest so she’s fit tomorrow.”
Bill was fumbling with his earing again and mumbled that he wished he could accompany you.
“Because you want to get out of the house or because you want to make sure she’s safe?” his father asked and pretended to still look in the book so his son wouldn’t feel to pressured.
“Both,” admitted his eldest son.
“Maybe you should just tell her?” Arthur closed the book and put it on top of the other ones they had used.
“Dad, we’re at war. We live in her house because they’re searching for us. I don’t think that this is the right time.”
“Then what is the right time?” Arthur put his hand on Bill's shoulder and squeezed it lightly before he let go and made his way to the bedroom he shared with his wife.
The next day you left after everyone had told you what they needed. You were gone longer than you anticipated and when you reappeared you had to take a deep breath. Bills long hair was flowing around his head and you watched him putting it behind his ears before he picked up the axe again to chop some wood. The noise of the axe hitting the wood carried over to you and you watched him for a while. You thought that you could get used to coming home and seeing him first thing. Suddenly he turned around and when he saw you standing there he let go of the axe and walked over to you.
“Is everything alright?” he asked when you were in earshot.
“Yes, can you help carrying these inside?” you pointed to the bags at your feet. He picked them up so there was only one left for you. “You coming?” he asked when he took a few steps towards the house and noticed you hadn’t followed him. You nodded and walked quickly so you could walk by his side.
The warm air engulfed you when you entered your home. You walked into the kitchen and put the bag on the big table next the ones Bill had already placed there. It didn’t take long for the other to noticed that you came home. You didn’t just bring groceries and clothes but also information you needed. There was a lot to talk about so you found yourself in the living room when it was already dark outside. The once loud conversation turned quiet when Arthur und Molly retired first. You got tired and while you still heard the conversation in the room you started to fall asleep. You were rolled up like a cat, your feet touching Bill's thighs and your head uncomfortably on the arm rest, but you were finally asleep.
“Did you know that a good shag helps with sleeping problems?” Fred asked not really directed at anyone, but Bill sent him a death glare none the less.  
“Would you shut up?” Bill made sure his brother didn’t wake you and you were still out like a light next to him.
“What? It’s not like I offered myself. Although I did say a good shag,” Fred put his hand on his chin as if he was still contemplating before he had to dodge the pillow his older brother was throwing at him.
George caught the pillow and placed it behind his back. “What my brother is trying to say: Will you finally make a move? Maybe it will give you both a little bit of peace."
When Bill looked at you and noticed the awkward state you fell asleep in he decided to wake you up. You excused yourself for falling asleep but the other Weasleys just told you to go to bed and get some rest. When you made your way outside the room you grabbed the armchair to stabilized yourself without noticing that it was George's arm instead. Three worried glances followed you out of the room.
“Seriously, we have to make sure that she finally sleeps, especially when she’s the only one who can leave. Last time I went to grab some water and saw her cooking apples at 3am because she couldn’t sleep,” Fred said. George rubbed his arm and told them he had also met her in the kitchen when he couldn’t sleep anymore.
Bill surprised you that night in the kitchen and you almost threw the spoon in your hand as you hadn’t heard him approaching you. Surprisingly he stayed calm but you were freaking out. You started apologizing over and over again. You were tired and you were preserving vegetables.
Instead of scolding you he just asked how long you’ve been awake and you admitted that you couldn’t sleep after you went to your bedroom. “You need to get to bed,” he said and turned off the stove, put his hands on your shoulder and stirred you in the direction of your bedroom. You were beat and didn’t protest until you laid in bed, Bill sitting next to you and when he started talking about cauldron thickness you soon fell into a deep sleep.
Without you knowing it the Weasleys started to stick closer to you. When you usually were alone tending the garden suddenly Fred and George helped picking up the apples. Arthur gathered the fallen leaves while you picked up the fallen branches and pilled everything for the animals. You and Molly prepared the dinner together and every time you left Bill welcomed you home as he waited in the garden. You couldn’t deny that you heart beat faster every time you saw him standing in front of your house.
Another thing you noticed is that every evening you all sat together in the great living room and the others noticed that you always fell asleep when someone sat with you in the evening. You often played board games and it was then you noticed that you had felt lonely all this time. You loved the noises around you, the feeling that there was somebody else by your side. This was what had been missing all this time. The big house was just too much for one person. Without realising you had grabbed the hand next to you and Bill squeezed your hand shortly before his thumb swiped over your hand. “Is everything alright, sweetheart?” he asked.
“Yes, everything is alright.” You loved the feeling of your hand in his warm one and you didn’t let go of his hand even when you fell asleep sometime later that night. But still when you laid in your own bed you couldn’t find sleep again.  Suddenly an idea struck you and before you could tell yourself how dumb this idea was you jumped out of bed and walked through the hallway to another door and knocked. When you heard a response, you opened the door and quickly walked so you wouldn’t wake another person. Bill had sat up in your old childhood bed. It was strange seeing him in the bed that been yours when you were a kid and a teenager.
“Are you okay, sweetheart?” he asked and your heart leapt at the pet name he used.
“It’s dumb, but... ugh, I wanted to ask you, if... ifIcouldsleepwithyoutonight,” you mumbled the last part so fast Bill wasn’t sure if he had understood you correctly.
“You want to sleep with me?” you could hear the smirk and that he didn’t sound as sleepy as before. But he knew you better than you thought because he told you to come over and he lifted the duvet for you. “Come here,” he said and walked quickly over the cold floor into the warm bed. A soft sigh left your mouth when you were surrounded by warmth.
Both of you laid on your back on each side on the bed and you let your hand find his before you fell into a deep sleep. You slept the best you’ve had for a long time, but same couldn’t be said about Bill. He couldn’t find sleep again with you laying next to him, your hand touching his. He wanted to pull you into his arms. Maybe he could sleep with his face pressed into your hair? But he didn’t want to wake you or make you feel uncomfortable so he stuck to this position with his thoughts going wild.
Bill pretended to be asleep when you woke up the next morning and gave you a few minutes before he left his room. But when you stepped into the hallway and closed the door quietly behind yourself George was greeting you with a shit eating grin on his face. “Morning,” he said without adding anything else. “Oh, shove it,” you said and walked past him towards your room. You didn’t see the point in telling him nothing had happened between you and his brother.
When Bill entered the kitchen his twin brothers were already there and of course George had told Fred what he had witnessed this morning. “So, did the shag help? Or were you too busy to even think about sleep,” Fred wiggled his eyebrows.
“Nothing happened,” Bill said and grabbed a cup.
“Too bad, so I think I have to offer my services then.”
“What services?” you asked when you entered the room.    
“Fred wants to expand our services for the shop,” George cut in.
“Tell me more,” you said after you filled a cup and sat down next to the trio. It didn’t take long for them to come up with something so they didn’t have to tell you what they really talked about.
Days passed, then weeks and it was an unspoken rule that you end up in Bills room after a failed attempt of going to sleep. You soon noticed that you couldn’t fall asleep because you didn’t want to be alone. And then it took a few days until you noticed you didn’t want to be without Bill. He made you laugh more and more. Like when you saw him pulling on a lumberjack jacket and asked him what he was doing. He had replied that he you needed more fire wood and you watched him through the kitchen window. You had seen how he picked up the axe without a problem and as if he had known that you were watching him, he slapped his butt with his free hand which caused you to laugh out loud and you had to hide behind the wall so he wouldn’t see that you had been watching him.
You also noticed that every night before you would leave the next day hugged you a little more and pulled you closer to himself. And when you came back, he still waited in the garden and grabbed your hand to guide you back to the house. Everyone noticed this but nobody commented on it. They noticed in the tentativeness when you grabbed his hand after hanging up your coat that the two of you hadn’t talked about what was happening between you.
And suddenly there wasn’t time to talk about it anymore. Suddenly the war was right in front of you with maybe the biggest battle and you had to get out of your hiding place. But in the way that Bill grabbed your hand with such determination and when you pulled you to himself and pressed his lips desperately against yours before you had to leave made you realise that you were in this together.  
171 notes · View notes
qveenmikaelson · 4 years
Text
Time
Paring : Massimo x Reader
Word Count : 3,999
Prompts : 5 + 8 “There Is No Us, There Never Was” & “Shut Up” (Prompts In Bold)
Warnings : Other Than My Terrible Writing, Swearing , Attempt At Angst, Mentions of Cheating, Massimo Being A Dick
A/n : This Is A Request From @shusrealm , I’m Still Trying To Learn And Tap Into Massimos Character Which Is Why It Has Taken Me A Minute To Start Posting But I Hope You Like It . 💜
A/n 2: Translations Are From Google So Sorry For Anything That Is Incorrect And Little Flashbacks Are In Bold
Lyrics In The Story Are From The Song Time : From The Show Star
Tumblr media
It’s Been Five Months
Since We’ve Had A Talk About Us
And We Went Our Separate Ways
“Yn You Don’t Honestly Believe Sulking Over This Guy Is Going To Change Anything Do You” London, Your Bestfriend Said Sitting At The Edge Of Your Bed
“No, But I Don’t Want To Do Anything Else So”
“It’s Been Five Months Since You’ve Been Back, You Haven’t Even Said Anything About What Happened”
“What Do You Want Me To Say” You Sighed Sitting Up In Your Bed “I Went To Sicily For What Was Supposed To Be A 3 Week Trip, But Ended Up Staying Longer Because I Met A Guy.. And Not Just Any Guy A Fucking Mafia Boss”
“No But I’m Your Bestfriend I Want You To Tell Me What Happened That Day Between You Two, I Want To Know The Reason My Bestfriend Has Been Locking Herself Away In Her Apartment Everyday For Five Months Doing Nothing Other Than The Occasional Grocery Shopping”
“I- I Just Feel So Stupid Ya Know” You Started To Explain .. Tears Already Lining The Rim Of Your Eyes As You Thought Back To That Day “So Naive To Think That What We Had .. That Everything Was Real”
“Sweetheart What Happen While You Were In Sicily” London Asked Climbing Next To You In Your Bed
“I Fell In Love .. But Of Course .. He Didn’t ”
But It Feels Like Yesterday
Since You Took My Heart In Your Hand
And You May Never Bring It Back No
They Say That Time Heals All Your Wounds
But I Don’t Know If That’s True, Oh, True
Because It Still Hurts
It Still Hurts, When I Think About You
Five Months Ago - Sicily
“I Never Knew You Could Cook Like This Yn” Domenico Said Tasting The Sauce You Had Cooking On The Stove
“Thank You , But Honestly It’s Just Following The Recipe”
“No, There’s A Difference Between Following A Recipe And Following A Recipe But Clearly Putting Your Own Twist To It” Dom Said Sitting On One Of The Chairs Near The Island “Massimo Is Going To Love It”
“Well I Couldn’t Of Pulled This Off Without You Dom.. Thank You Again For Telling Me Some Of His Favorite Dishes He Loved To Eat” You Said As You Were Walking Back And Fourth Between The Stove To The Refrigerator Then Back To The Stove “And For Picking Up The Groceries For Me”
“It Was My Pleasure Yn”
“Okay .. Everything’s Done In Here” You Said Taking Off The Apron You Were Wearing “I Need You To Do One More Thing For Me Domenico”
“Anything”
“Mas Is Going To Be Back Soon , And I Still Have To Get Cleaned Up, So If You Don’t Mind, Could You Or Anyone Else Set Up The Table For Me” You Said As You Started To Walk Out If The Kitchen
“Of Course Yn” Domenico Yelled As You Disappeared Behind The Wall
Massimo Was Coming Back From One Of His Business Trips Today And You Decided It Would Be Nice For The Two Of You To Sit And Have A Nice Home Cooked Dinner, With Some Of His Favorite Childhood Dishes, Courtesy Of Domenico. When You Asked Him About It He Told You He Would Give The List Of Foods To The Chef To Make But You Insisted That You Wanted To Cook The Meal Yourself, A Way Of Showing Massimo How Much You Care About Him.
It Wasn’t Anything Too Fancy Just A Simple Dinner For The Both Of You To Unwind. Things Have Been A Little Tense And Hectic For Mas These Last Two Weeks And You Just Wanted Him To Relax A Little Bit.
———————————————————————-
It Was Now Going On 8 And Massimo Should Be Back At The House Any Minute Now . After You We’re Done Cooking You Had Dom Set Up Everything And Made Sure Everything Was Ready To Be Taking Out To The Table Once You And Mas Sat Down, While You Went And Freshened Up.
You Decided On Nothing Too Fancy, A Cute Black Skater Dress That Stopped Mid Thigh, The Back Out And Showed Not To Much But Just Enough Cleavage. For Your Hair You Went With A Cute Sleek Low Ponytail And A Light Natural Look For Your Makeup With A Nude Lip . By The Time You Were Done, It Was Almost 9:30 .. A Little Late You Thought But It’s Okay, As Long As Everything Went Okay And The Night Was Still Enjoyable. You Had Informed Domenico To Lead Massimo To The Set Up Table In The Back Once He Arrived And Then You Would Be Down Shortly . Since It Was Already 9:30 You Knew You Were Running Behind Schedule So You Hurriedly Made Your Way To The Back Where Everything Was.
“I Am So Sorry I Had You Sitting Out Here, My Makeup Up Took A Little Longer Than Expected” You Were Saying As You Were Rounding The Corner To The Table But Stopped Once You Saw Nobody There .
“Hm , So I Guess I’m Not The Only One Late” You Said As You Went To Sit Down At The Table “Let Me Call Him”
You Pulled Your Phone Out And Clicked On Mas Name Hearing It Ring A Couple Of Times Before It Went To Voice Mail
“You’ve  Massimo Torricelli, If You’re Hearing This I Am Busy Or Handling Business Right Now So Leave A Message After The Tone .. Hai raggiunto Massimo Torricelli, se stai ascoltando questo sono occupato o sto gestendo affari in questo momento, quindi lascia un messaggio dopo il ”
Sighing You Left A Message “Hey Mas Just Checking To Make Sure Everything Is Okay, And To See That You Landed Safely, Call Me Once You Hear This, Cant Wait To See You” Hanging Up Your Phone And Sitting It Down You Reached For The Bottle Of Wine That Was Sitting In The Bucket Of Ice On The Table Pouring You What You Feel Is Going To Be A Much Needed Glass.
3 Hours, 6 Unanswered Phone Calls, And 1 Empty Bottle A Wine Later, It’s 12:30am And You’re Beyond Pissed Off Now. So You Told The Chef To Clean Everything Up And Decided To Call It A Night . Domenico Left A Little Bit Over An Hour Ago To “Go Meet Massimo” But He Hasn’t Been Back Yet, And He’s Not Answering Any Calls Either . So Much For A Nice Quiet Dinner With The Man That You Love.
That’s Really What This Night Was About, You Met Massimo Almost A Year Ago When You Were On Vacation And To Say Opposites Attract Would Be An Understatement. What Was Supposed To Be Only A One Night Thing Turned Into So Much More . After That One Night You And Mas Were Enamored By Each other. And One Night Turned Into Multiple, Which Then Turned Into Him Asking You To Stay A Little Bit Longer.
“rimanere” Massimo Said As The Two Of You Were Laying In Bed , You Tracing The Small Tattoo On His Chest
“You Know I Don’t Know Italian Like That Mas” You Laughed Out Looking Up At Him As If Asking Him To Repeat Himself But In English
“Stay” He Said Sitting Up Causing You To Sit Up Too Pulling The Cover Up To Cover Your Chest “Stay Here With Me A Little While Longer”
“I Can’t.. My Vacation Is Only 3 Weeks Long Which Ends In Two Days.. And Even If I Wanted To Stay I Don’t Have Any Clothes”
“I’ll Buy You More , What Ever You Need Or Want I Got You Baby Girl” He Said Taking Your Hand Kissing The Back Back Of It
What Started Off As You Only Staying For A Month And No More Than That, Turned Into Two, Then Three, Then Mas Eventually Asking You To Stay With Him Permanently. You Were Skeptical At First But He Convinced You In More Ways Than One That Night That You Were The One He Wanted To Be With, And That He’d Do Anything For You.
Over The Course Of The Last Year You’ve Spent With Massimo You Know Without A Doubt You’ve Fallen In Love With Him, And Even Thought You Both Haven’t Said Those Three Words To Each other Yet, You Know He Feels The Same. Or At Least You Did, These Last Few Weeks Has Had You Questioning A Lot Of Things, Which Is Why This Dinner Was So Important For You. You Felt It Was Finally Time To Tell Him That You Loved Him .. With Every Fiber Of Your Being .
———————————————————————
Once You Woke Up The Next Morning You Instinctively Rolled Over To The Other Side Of The Bed, Only To Open Your Eyes And See That Massimo Wasn't In Bed. In Fact His Side Was Still Made Which Means That He Either Didn’t Come Back At All Last Night Or Didn’t Bother Coming To Bed . No Matter Which One Happened They Both Still Hurt.
After Stretching You Got Up And Went About With Your Daily Morning Routine . Deciding You Wanted To Dress Comfortable Today You Through On One Of Massimo Button Down Shirts That You Love To Wear And Some Black Leggings And Made Your Way Out To The Back Where The Chef Usually Had Breakfast Waiting.
As The Table Came Into View You Noticed Domenico First Then You Saw Mario Sitting Down, Then You Saw Massimo Sitting There. There Were Having What Sounded Like A Serious Discussion And Domenico Was About To Speak Until He Saw You Walking Up, Then He Stopped Talking.
“No Don’t Stop On My Behalf” You Said As You Pulled Out The Chair Next To Massimo “Continue” You Said Looking At Him .. And If Looks Could Kill , He’d Be Dead Right Now
Both Mario And Domenico Picked Up On The Arising Tension In The Air And Decided That That Was Their Cue To Leave “Goodmorning Principessa” Domenico Said As He Got Up From The Table “Mas” He Said Walking Away With Mario Following Leaving You And Massimo There Alone . You Waited Until They Were Out Of Ears Rang Before You Started Your Interrogation
“Well Goodmorning To You Too” You Said Picking Up A Piece Of Fruit Trying To Keep Your Voice As Calm As Possible Even Though You Felt Like You Were About To Explode With Anger
“Morning”
“Morning” You Repeated In A Voice Trying To Sound Like Him “Morning Is All You Have To Say? Not Even A Morning Baby Girl .. What Happen Yesterday .. More Importantly, Why Didn’t You Answer None Of My Calls”
“Let’s Not Start Love.. I Was Busy” Massimo Said As He Grabbed His Phone That Since You Sat Down As Been Going Off Non Stop
“BUSY .. He Was Busy” You Laughed “To Busy To The Point That You Couldn’t Even Shoot Me A Text And Say Hey Baby I’m Handling Something Right Now.. Don’t Wait Up.. Like Damn You Had Me Out Here Waiting For Your Ass For 3 Fucking Hours”
Grabbing Your Arm, Massimo Pulled You Close To Him So You Could Hear Him Better Because He’s Never Really One To Raise His Voice “Okay 1.. I Don’t Know Who You Think You Are But You Are Not About To Sit Up Here And Raise Your Voice To Me, And 2.. I’m The Boss Of All This Shit I Do What I Want When I Want Without Nobody’s Consent.. I Don’t Have To Call And Tell You Shit Capire (Understand) ” Letting Your Arm Go He Sat Back In His Chair And Pulled Out His Phone Again .
Him And This Damn Phone, You Were Getting Tired Of It, It’s Never Went Off This Much Business Or Not, And All Of His Important Contacts Always Called , Never Texted Him.
“Okay First Of You Not About To Sit Up Here And Talk To Me Like That” You Said “And Secondly I Deserve To Fucking Know Because I’m Your Fucking Girlfriend And Because I Fucking Love You, I Spent Hours Making Multiple Of Your Favorite Dishes Dom Said You Loved To Eat Before Just So We Could Have A Nice Night Together To Relax, Only For You To Fucking Not Come Home And Not Answer My Calls, And You Want To Sit Here And Basically Spit In My Face And Say You Don’t Care” You Said Standing Up Over Massimo Realizing That He’s Not Even Paying Attention To You, But Rather His Phone That Keeps Going Off
“And Who The Fuck Is It That Has All Your Attention Right Now That You Can’t Even Look At Me” You Said Snatching His Phone Out Of His Hand And Stepping Away From Him And The Table To Give You Time To Look And What You Seen Completely Shattered Your Heart . On The Screen Was Messages Between Massimo And Some Girl Named Mina, Pictures Of The Girl Sent To Massimo, And Even Pictures Of Mas Sent To Her. Pictures Even You Don’t Get When He’s Going For Long Periods Of Time
They Say You Can’t Sing The Blues
Until You Got Your Heart Broken In Two
Well I Can Sing The Blues
A Million Times Plus Two
“Wa- Who Is Mina .. And Why Was Last Night Such A Good Time” You Asked Questions You Already Knew The Answer To As Tears Started To Build In Your Eyes “Is This Why You Didn’t Come Home Last Night, Why You Couldn’t Answer None Of My Calls”
“Don’t You Dare Snatch Nothing Away From Me Like That Again Ever In Your Life O-“ Massimo Started To Say Walking Back Up To You Snatching His Phone Back
“Or What Mas .. You Gonna Hurt Me?” You Said Tears Falling Already “ Because It’s To Late For That.”
“sta 'zitto” Massimo Said Turning Around And Starting To Walk Away” You’re Over Reacting”
“What ??”
He Stopped To Turn And Face You Again “I Said Shut Up, You’re Over Reacting”
“Excuse Me !!” You Yelled .. Anger Now On A 100 “I’m Over Reacting .. You Over Here Fucking And Sexting This Bitch And You Tell Me I’m Over Reacting”
If You Were Being Honest With Yourself You Didn’t Imagine That This Was The Conversation You’d Be Having With Massimo. Yes You Was Upset With Him About Last Night And You Were Going To Talk To Him About It , You Just Didn’t Expect Everything To Take A Turn For The Worst .
“I Can’t Believe You” You Said A Little Quieter That Before “How Could You”
“What?�� He Asked Looking At You, And The Look He Had In His Eyes Was So Unrecognizable, So Different From The Deep Hazel Brown Eyes That You Loved Waking Up Too Every Morning
“How Could You Do This .. T- To Us”
“Us ??” He Questioned As He Laughed A Laugh That Sent Shivers Down Your Spine, One That Was Going To Haunt Your Dreams Every Night “There Is No Us, There Never Was”
“W-What” You Stuttered Back, Voice No Higher Than A Whisper, So Quiet That You Weren’t Even Sure He Heard You But He Did . If Your Heart Wasn’t Broken Before, It Sure As Hell Is Now
And The Heartbreak, Heartbreak
Comes Right After The Heartache
“There Is No Us Sweetheart, This .. Between Us It Was Never Anything Serious, Just A Little Fun”
“Fun?” You Said As Tears Completely Covered Your Face Now “I Basically Dropped My Life Back In The States Just To Be With You, And The Only Thing This Was To You Was Fun?”
“Sorry To Break It To You Baby Girl” He Said Fixing The Cuffs On His Dress Shirt While Not Once Taking His Eyes Off Of You
“Well If All This Was, Was Fun Then I Guess There’s No Need For Me To Stay” You Said Attempting To Wipe Some Of The Tears That Were Still Falling But It Wasn’t Really Know Use
“No There Isn’t, Ill Get Domenico To Book You A Flight Back Home As Soon As Possible” He Said Starting To Walk Away But Before He Did He Said One Last Thing “I Want Everything I’ve Gotten You Since You Been Here .. But You Can Keep That Shirt, You’ve Ruined It Anyway” And With That He Walked Away Completely Leaving You To Wallow In Your Own Tears
———————————————————————
Somehow Massimo Managed To Get You A Flight That Same Day But You’re Not Really Surprised Anymore, It’s Massimo You’re Talking About, Anything He Wanted He Got, And Anything He Didn’t Want He Got Rid Of .. And Apparently That Was You
The Ride To The Airport Was To Say The Least Awkward. Domenico Offered To Ride With You To See That You Made It To Your Flight Safely But You Honestly Just Wanted To Be Alone . Starring Out Of The Window You Were Looking At The Beautiful Buildings You Were Going To Miss Because You Honestly Were Never Going To Step Foot In This Country Again .
So Much Was Going Through Your Head That You Didn’t Even Realize You Started Crying Again. Not Until Domenico Spoke
“Principessa ..” He Started But Then Stopped Not Knowing What To Say. But You Couldn’t Really Blame Him. Comforting A “Damsel In Distress” Wasn’t Really Apart Of His Job Description “Maybe Going Back Home Is For The Best.. This Life... This Life Isn’t The Type Of Life You Should Be Living”
“Did You Know” You Asked Looking At Him And Ignoring What He Just Said “You Know What Of Course You Knew.. Your His Bestfriend His Right Hand Man.. Damn I Feel So Fucking Stupid”
Domenico Just Sat There Trying To Figure Out The Right Thing To Say, But Every time He Opened His Mouth He Closed It Right Back Second Guessing His Words
“It May Hurt Now Principessa But Given Time It Will Get Better And You Will Forget All About Massimo, Like I Said It’s Probably For The Best” He Said Carefully Sitting His Hand On Your Knee As A Way To Comfort You
You Scoffed “Yeah .. Time”
———————————————————————
Present Time - Back At Your Apartment
They Say That Time Heals All Your Wounds
But I Don’t Know If That’s True
I Don’t Think That It’s True
Cause It Still Hurts, It Still Hurts
When I Think About You
Once You Finished Telling London What Happened You Both Were In Tears . Your Tears Because Even Though It’s Been Five Months Every time You Think About Him Or Anything That Reminds You Of Him, You Just Start Hurting All Over Again And London’s Tears Because Her Bestfriend Is Hurting And The Man That Caused It Is Still Breathing
“You Know I’m Trying .. I Truly Am” You Started To Say Through The Constant Sniffing That Was Going On “Some days I Really Do Feel Okay And Then There’s Others Where I Just Want My Bed To Swallow Me Alive”
You Got Up Out Of The Bed To Go Get Both Of You Some Tissue Instead Of Using The Covers And Your Hands When You Got Back To The Room Your Friends Was Walking Out Of Your Closet With A Cute Sleeveless Romper In Her Hand
“What Are You Doing” You Asked Sitting The Roll Of Tissue On Your Dresser
“It’s A Nice Day, The Suns Out Shining, No Clouds In The Sky.. Were Going Out And Enjoying This Day .. You Need Some Vitamin D Anyways” London Started To Say “Now Go Shower And Get Ready”
Not Even Wanting To Argue With Her Because She Always Gets Her Way You Just Complied Without Saying Anything. Once You We’re Out The Shower You Decided To Just Let Your Hair Flow Free, You Put On The Peach Colored Romper And Decided To Go Without Too Much Makeup This Time, Only Doing Your Eyebrows , Putting Some Lashes On And Some Clear Lipgloss.
“I Honestly Don’t See Why He Cheated Because Baby You Is Fine” London Said As You Walked Out Of The Bathroom Causing You To Laugh
“So .. Lets Get This Show On The Road Shall We” You Said Making Sure You Grabbed Your Purse, Phone, And Charger
“Yay Girls Day” London Said Skipping Out Of Your Room Making You Laugh Harder Because You Honestly Didn’t Know What You Were Going To Do With Her
——————————————————————-
You And London Spent The Whole Day Shopping, Walking Around Downtown, And Just Enjoying Each others Company. You All Decided To Go And Get Your Nails And Toes Done The Stopped For A Snack To East Before You Went Back To Shopping . At The End Of It All, You Both Decided To Have Dinner At This Restaurant Everyone Had Been Talking About “Maggiano’s” . You Were Hesitant At First Because You Were Honestly Having A Great Day And Didn’t Want To Go Down That Road Again Of Thinking About Massimo But London Insisted Stating “You’re Always Going To See Something That Reminds You Of Him, You Cant Let Him Take The Joy Out Of Your Life, You Have To Take Your Power Back .. Fuck Him” So Here You Are Having Dinner With Your Bestfriend And You Honestly See Why Everyone Hypes This Restaurant Up
“I Really Cant Thank You Enough For This London” You Said As You Took A Sip Of Your Wine
“Hey That’s What I’m Here For, I’m Your Bestfriend And I Will Always Be There For You Through Anything, And I Will Help You Get Through This, No Matter How Much Time It Takes” She Said As She Reached Across The Table To Grab Your Hand. Just As You Were About To Say Something The Waiter Walked Back Up To Your Table With A Bottle Of Wine And A Card In His Hand
“For You Ma’am” He Said Sitting The Bottle Down And Handing You The Card .. London Looked At You Confused But You Were Just As Confused
“I’m Sorry But We Didn’t Order This Bottle” You Said Hesitantly Taking The Card “There Must Be A Mistake
“Compliments Of The Restaurant” He Said As He Turned And Walked Away
“Well Shit I’m Not About To Turn Down A Free Bottle” London Said Grabbing It Off The Table While You Sat Looking At The Card .. This Feeling In The Back Of Your Mind Telling You Not To Open It But The Curiosity Getting The Best Of You .. As You Opened It The Beautiful Golden Calligraphy Writing On The Inside Made Your Heart Drop, And London Must Have Noticed Because She Reached Over Grabbing The Card And Looking At It, But Was Confused
“What Is This?” She Said Looking Up At You “Is This In Ita-“ But Before She Could Finish You Answered For Her Reciting The Contents Of The Card Like The Back Of Your Hand
“ Sei il mio sole, la mia luna e tutte le mie stelle”
If There Was Any One Word Or Phrase You Picked Up, And Gotten To Learn.. It Was This
“And What Does It Mean” London Asked Still Confused As Ever .. More So Because You Just Recited What Was In The Card So Perfectly
As You Started To Tell London What The Phrase Meant, You Heard Another Voice Coming Up From Behind You Saying The Same Thing. And In That Moment You Almost Died Because You Know That Voice Anywhere .
“ You are my sun, my moon, and all of my stars.” And As You Finished Telling London What The Card Said , He Came From Behind You Standing Next To The Table Still Looking As Good As You Last Remembered Him. For A Second You Couldn’t Find The Right Words To Say But Knowing You Had To Say Something You Said The Only Thing Your Mind Allowed You To Say, But Of Course In A Slight Whisper
“Mas..”
“Hello Babygirl”
“Holy Shit” London Said
Tag List : @nebulastarr
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Chicago Lightning
Summary: You and the rest of the Mud Dogs plan a heist on a bank, and end up getting into a pretty serious gun fight. It’s way different from what you usually attempt, but where there’s a will, there’s a way. 
[A/N: Good evening, fellow Mud Dogs enjoyers <3 These three live in my head rent FREE and by god, I’m gonna make that everyone else’s problem.]
Content Warnings: Gunfights, mild arson, copious swearing, crime, and the fear of death. Nobody dies, and there’s a happy ending. <3
Pairing: Mud Dogs/Reader (Platonic/Familial) 
Word Count: 1572
God, your ears are gonna be fucking ringing tomorrow. Whoever suggested staging a robbery is certainly going to get a verbal beating, if you even make it out of here in the first place. The deafening “crack” of a bullet tearing by instinctively pushes you further into the white, porcelain countertop, and you blindly fire a few rounds from behind cover. Your ears ring at the noise, and your legs ache dully from crouching down for so long. 
“What’s the plan?” You yell, glancing nervously towards the pillar where Leonard’s taking cover. 
“I don’t know!” he yells back, “Give me a minute to think!” He taps his fingers against the muzzle of the glock, eyes glancing around the building. Dust from ricocheting bullets clouds the air, sending pits of granite and porcelain dust through the room. The light filters through them, although just barely so. You hardly even recognize the building anymore, you think to yourself. Leonard fires a few shots from behind the pillar before taking cover once more, looking up at the ceiling with furrowed brows. 
“Hate to burst your bubble, Loathsome,” Danny yells from your left, “But we’re already a bit behind the eight ball here. We don’t have time to spare!” 
“Yeah, no shit!” Mickey yells, “And I’m not really in my element, either.” He fires off a couple shots, and the recoil from the gun is obvious despite his white-knuckle grip on the firearm. He scowls, turning to fire off a few more shots from the other side of the counter. What he lacks in experience he makes up for in pure gusto.
“Easy on the lightning, pal!” Danny calls, “we ain’t exactly armed to the teeth, here. If we run out of ammo, we’re screwed!” 
“I’ve got it!” Leonard yells to you, “Grab those bottles of hand sanitizer off the counter and throw ‘em to Mickey. We’re gonna light it on fire, throw it at ‘em, and bolt for the back.” 
“Then what?” You say, grabbing the bottles and throwing them to your friend. 
“Steal a fucking car, I guess? What else?” 
“Sounds good to me!” Mickey calls. His eyes light up as he disassembles the bottles, twisting and turning a few paper bills to create a sizable fuse that leads out of the liquid disinfectant, like the true firebug he is. If they land just right, it should spread quickly enough to get out of control. If they land perfectly, that is. But you’re not gonna have time to tell, are you? You just have to pray that it does, and if it doesn’t, that it burns hot enough to stall them. Oh, how you’re lamenting skipping out on that oxidation unit in chemistry class.  
“Just tell me when!” He shouts, although you can barely hear him over the crack of yet another bullet flying by, a little too close for comfort. 
You look back towards the emergency exit, steeling yourself to run. The bright red sign flickers slowly, just barely clinging to life after being struck with a stray bullet. You tear your eyes away from the door, glancing at your friends nervously. The air between all of you isn’t peaceful: not by any means. But it’s full of understanding: An understanding that if there’s any real, perfect way to go out, it would be right here. Danny’s grip tightens on his gun, and the tip of his tail twitches slightly, as though he were fighting the sensation entirely. Leonard’s eyes flit around the room quickly, scowling down the opposition on the other side of the building. Yet when he turns to the rest of you, his eyebrows soften. And Mickey’s apprehension… God, he’s doing a great job of hiding it. He smiles brightly, but the look in his eyes clearly conveys his thoughts. His fingers twitch around the plastic bottle, peeling at the wrapper as though looking for something to tether him to the world. The pops of your enemy’s guns might as well be static, for all you care. 
But it’s the chipping of porcelain, the crack of a supersonic bullet whizzing past you, and the pop of yet another gun that brings you out of your stupor. The corner of the porcelain countertop chips off and falls to your feet, and you can feel your heart leap into your chest. Had you been leaning out any farther, you’d be dead. Your breath catches in your throat, and you throw yourself deeper into cover. You whip your head around to Leonard, steeling your nerves and throwing him a firm nod. 
“On three!” He shouts. 
“One!”
Inhale. You’re all gonna be okay. 
“Two!” 
Exhale. You shoot one last look at your friends and set your eyes on the door.
“Three!” 
Mickey shocks the flammable paper leading out of the bottle and chucks it towards the entrance of the building the moment it forms a strong and steady flame. And for a moment, the world moves in slow motion. It arcs wildly, but the flame persists nonetheless, crawling its way into the bottle. It hits the ground with a thunk - much less grand than your traditional molotov, you remark sarcastically - and splatters. The flame jumps from puddle to puddle, quickly spreading out of control. The rest of the containers are thrown haphazardly, which only fuels the intense and wild flames: it eats at the carpet, the walls, anywhere it can reach. And with that, all four of you bolt towards the exit. 
Your feet pound against the carpet, and you’re the first to reach the door. You ram your shoulder against the bar, opening it quickly for everyone to follow out. You bolt for the nearest car, looking back once to make sure everyone’s made it out. And sure enough, they have. The nearest car is an old four-door, and you pray to every deity you can think of as you race towards it. You shoot at the passenger side window, shattering the glass almost instantly, and you throw your hand through the jagged pieces to unlock the car as quickly as possible. You throw open the car door, ripping off your jacket and throwing it over the broken glass on the seat before patting around the car for a spare key. You don’t have any fucking time to hotwire the damn thing, and who the fuck knows what year this thing is from? 
You breathe a sigh of relief when you find it and clamber into the car, jamming the jagged end of the key into the ignition and smiling as the car roars to life. Danny is the second to reach the car, sliding over the hood to hop in the passenger side. Mickey is the third, as Leonard runs behind him, providing covering fire for the smaller man. You reach behind your seat, pulling up the lock for him to tear open the door. And with that, Leonard runs the final few feet to the car, throwing himself in the door that’s already open and sliding in next to Mickey. You don’t waste a second, throwing the car into reverse before speeding out of the lot. 
The force throws you harshly back into your seat, but you can’t help but laugh. “We made it out! Holy shit!” You put the pedal to the metal, gripping the steering wheel tightly as you floor it down the street. The buildings zip by so fast that they’re hardly more than a blur, and you revel in the adrenaline rush. The boys laugh alongside you, still reeling from their escape. You swerve off the small street and onto the highway; hopefully, you’ll be able to turn off onto the countryside at some point and find a remote place to lie low while the heat dies down. A farmhouse would be nice, you hum to yourself, although who really knows where you’ll end up this time? 
Mickey leans forward through the armrest. “Dude,” he laughs, “that was the coolest shit ever!” 
“We almost died,” Danny chuckles, dragging his hand along the armrest, flicking off little pieces of glass as he goes, “But I have to admit... it was pretty incredible.” 
“See? I told you guys I had it all figured out,” Leonard says, “And look at all this fucking cash! Even after Big Mama’s cut, we’re still gonna be rich.” 
“And did you see how quickly that fire spread? You might as well have doused the damn building in Everclear!” Mickey laughs, “Something tells me that place won’t be there tomorrow.” 
The highway is practically abandoned, perhaps because of the recent events. And for that, you’re thankful. You’re sure that in a few minutes you’ll be chased down by those blue and red lights, but for now, everything is okay. You press the pedal down as far as you can, making as much distance as possible before the chase starts up once more, and you chuckle. Danny rests his arm on the window, picking up little pieces of shattered glass off of his seat and throwing it out onto the highway. That’ll be someone else’s problem then, you think to yourself. He meets your gaze with a smile, and you return it happily. Mickey and Leonard shove each other playfully in the back seat as they rifle through the duffle bags, presumably counting your earnings. 
“So,” you muse, “how many days do you think it’ll take before we can go to a restaurant without getting arrested?”
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It worked! Sorry to bug you with a message! But I'd like to request a cake now!
So, about me. I have an actual name but I don't think I've heard it in months😃, instead I have a bunch of nicknames! (Rion, ri, oreo, onion, o, etc), I'm actually nb so I chose that name, however I 100% consider naming myself Arson💀My pronouns are they/them and I'm about 5'5, I have short, fluffy brown hair that I usually dye the front blue. I'm Asian hispanic, but I really don't look like either- my favorite foods are either really spicy and salty or sweet. Not the overwhelming chemical sweet tho, like a natural sweet flavor. My personality type is infp, and ig when I first meet people I can be shy (that's an understatement, I was mute for the first week of school🕳🏃‍♂️) but once I get to know people I can be pretty chaotic (once again, arson). I'm not a 100% demon spawn though, I don't really like making scenes in public and I probably will cry if I do- but I still have fun lol. I'm also the person who copes with severe mental health issues using humor, to an alarming degree 😔 I'm the therapist friend when really I'm the one who needs therapy. I also have a social battery that can die at random times, so I really like/need friends who can handle random mood changes of me going from energetic to silent in seconds. Academically, I'm really book smart, I'm a tutor, but my grades don't reflect it. I tend to procrastinate a lot and avoid studying, usually I catch myself last minute or trust memory on tests, but every now and then there's something that tanks my grades. I'm not very athletic, but I still try to play sports. I enjoy the feeling when I do something right, but the rest of the time I usually beat myself up for messing up.
And now just random facts 😃👍
My favorite color is yellow, not the bright eye sore shade that makes you want to throw up, but the nice softer, light shade. And I like anything that comes with that color! (Sunflowers, flowy sundresses and flip flops, summer activities, burning concrete, warm rain, etc). Nobody knows my music taste, it changes weekly, however I usually come back to mitski/cavetown or summer themed songs a lot! I enjoy playing music, but I have the curse of being a fast learner so that usually leads to be being bored and learning a new instrument at any given chance. And my birthday is a weird date that fucks with zodiacs so I can be considered either a leo or cancer, my personality changes a bunch, so take your pick lol. (Though emotionally I tend to be cancerous, I just express it and show it in a way a leo would) And someday I wanna be a long term traveler, or a florist. Just a job that makes me happy :). And I guess if I had to classify my aesthetic it would be bloomcore or soft grunge. I like wearing big sweaters and if I could I would wear a bunch of butterfly clips in my hair and wear mom jeans. (I would also wear man crushers, I mean, platforms if I was confident)
Aaaannnnd that was really long sorry!
To sum up, I'm just a bipolar bitch with depression and anxiety 👍
Thanks a bunch for just taking the time to read this!
@oririon
Romantic Matchup
Bokuto Koutarou
Tumblr media
How Y’all Met
IERJNDJS
I’m getting a classic summer love vibe from this matchup 👀
Ok so I just Hc that Bokuto LOVES flowers
So he would always just go to the local flower shop to look at them
Pls hes to precious I cant-
But anyways you we’re working a summer job at the flower shop
And you grew fond of our little owl boy
You would always talk to him whenever he visited
He just made your job that much more enjoyable :)
So one day you stopped him right before he left and told him he could pick a bouquet of flowers if he wanted
He BEAMED at you and picked a bouquet of flowers he always looked at whenever he came
But what shocked you was instead of walking out with them
He gave them to you!
He then went on talking about how he really liked you but didn’t know how to tell you
At this point he was just rambling
So you laughed and asked him if he would like to go to the ocean with you after your shift
He agreed and you swear you saw stars in his eyes
After your shift you met up with Bokuto and went to the beach
You guys literally spent ALL day there!
And even some of the night 👀
Being the gentleman he is offered to walk you home
And when you two got to your house he asked you to be his s/o
What They Love About You
Ok starting off with a strange one
He loves the fact that your favorite color is yellow 💛
He just thinks it fits you so well 😊
He loves that you have to ability to turn your trauma into humor
Now I’m ngl...
Ye found it extremely concerning at first 🥲
But once you explained it was like a coping mechanism for you
He was super supportive!
AAAAAAAA
He LOVES your aesthetic!
He thinks it’s so cute
And once again he thinks it fits you 👀
He appreciates the fact that your smart
If he doesn’t understand something in class
He’ll just go to you!
And honesty going over the material with him has helped your understanding as well 👀
Bokuto s grades:📈
Your grades: 📈
Favorite Things To Do Together
Oml he loves summers with you
Any summer activity
Beaches
Ice cream
Flower meadows 👀
Summer night drives
The whole shtick
But when it’s not summer
He loves doing classic seasonal activities
Examples:
Fall - Jumping in leaf piles, coffee dates, preparing for Halloween, etc
Winter - Snowball fights/Making Snowmen, Christmas movie marathons, hot cocoa/ baking, etc
Spring - Dancing in the rain, picnics, gardening etc
It’s a vibe year round with bf Bokuto
Random Hc
His favorite season is summer
And his second is winter
Ik...polar opposites
Oof
He TOTALLY gets your mood swings
Although they may not be the same as his
He still understands them and respects them
Every year on your anniversary he buys you the exact same bouquet he gave you at the flower shop
Speaking of the flower shop 👀
He got a job there with you the following summer
So you guys basically spent most of your days together
Bokuto is REALLY bad at dark humor
But for some reason he still tries 😭
It’s either TOO dark
Or not dark at all 💀
Astrology
(We’re gonna go with your cancer zodiac 😂)
When Cancer and Virgo make a love match, a strong, down-to-earth relationship with staying power is the happy result.
This is a relationship with great potential to get better and better over the passing years.
Both Cancer and Virgo are goal-oriented and disciplined.
They are sincere and devoted to one another and share a strong sense of purpose.
No lightweight love here: These two were not really built for flings!
Cancer and Virgo deeply admire one another: Virgo respects Cancer’s quiet strength and dedication while Cancer appreciates Virgo’s keen adaptability and intelligence.
These lovers may get off to a slow start, but over time, bonds will only grow stronger.
The Cancer-Virgo love match prides itself on common sense and strong principles over fluff and inconsequential or fleeting connections.
They enjoy the material comforts of life, but they will only feel good about their bounty if it has come as a result of honest hard work.
There could be tiffs if Virgo becomes too critical for Cancer’s easily bruised feelings; Cancer needs to understand that it’s just Virgo’s nature to point out what they observe, that it’s not a personal attack.
A Virgo may bristle at their Cancer mate’s stubborn streak, but it’s a trait that a patient and understanding love partner like Virgo could come to appreciate.
Also, Virgo’s urge to serve suits Cancer’s affectionate, nurturing nature well.
Their dedication to working toward the same goals.
Both partners in this love match enjoy a stable home life and nice things, and Virgo truly enjoys helping Cancer along the way to achieving their goals.
Their shared goals and desires make theirs a highly compatible love match.
Overall Aesthetic
Bloomcore 🌸
Bloom - Jesse
This Side of Paradise - Coyote Theory
Flaming Hot Cheetos - Claire
Mystery of Love - Sufjan Stevens
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sidecarghost · 4 years
Text
Spn 12x11 “Regarding Dean” Canon Divergent Destiel Fic
Suptober20 - Day 26 Walk of Shame
Notes: Dean and Castiel both get a chance to ride the mechanical bull in this canon div fic.
Dean feels a cool breeze and reaches for a blanket to wrap himself in. But his hand finds nothing but... grass? His head pounds and his eyes protest as he wills them open. So, at some point his latest escapades got him passed out in a field. He pushes himself up into a seated position. The feral bunny that had been nuzzled into his side gives him a look of reproach.
“Hey little buddy,” Dean tells the bunny. “Do you know how I got here?”
The bunny hops away. Dean realizes he is missing some things like his phone, car keys, and clothes. He just has his brown bear boxer-briefs on. So last night either went really well or really bad. Sam would know. Just gotta give him a call. Dean walks in a random direction hoping to find someone for help.
Dean doesn’t have to look long, as he almost trips over a dude sleeping along the trail. This guy is following Dean’s trend of wearing underwear as sleepwear for the great outdoors. “Hey,” Dean reaches a foot out to tap the sleeping dude.
“Hey yourself,” a deep voice groggily answers.
“Cas?” Dean questions.
The not quite awake Castiel rolls over and squints at Dean. “Hello Dean,” he says. “You aren’t wearing any pants.” Castiel informs his friend.
“Yeah Cas,” Dean responds. “I’m not the only one.”
“So it would seem. Let me know when you solve the mystery of our wayward clothes.” Castiel yawns and begins to nod off again.
***
“Cas, what are you doing? You don’t sleep remember?”
“That does sound like something I’ve said,” Castiel admits.
“Come on buddy. Let’s try to find someone that can help us.” Dean tells the nearly comatose angel.
Castiel moans in a way that Dean decides is unfairly pornographic. Dean then finds himself staring as Castiel performs a full body stretch by reaching his arms back behind his head and stretching his feet out in the opposite direction. This maneuver causes all the well toned muscles on Castiel’s body to flex. Damn, Dean thinks, walking with Castiel in his underwear just got way more awkward.
“I’m going up the trail. Catch up when you can,” Dean tells Castiel as he hastily retreats away from his friend.
After a few minutes, Castiel has caught up to Dean on the trail and they see a park up ahead. Dean would rather not get arrested for public indecency, so he tries to think of a plan to somehow get a phone without exposing himself.
“Cas we can’t just walk into a park in our skivvies,” Dean says. “Do you have any ideas?”
“Um... if Sam was an angel we could pray to him to bring us clothes.”
“Do we know any angels that aren’t dicks and could help us?” Dean asks.
“No,” Castiel admits. “Networking has always been a challenge for me.“
“No worries Cas, nobody’s perfect.” Dean responds. As Dean considers their next move, he notices a runner in the park. The runner is the size of a small giant, and he has his trademark long, flowing hair partially covered by a beanie. “Hey Cas, look we are saved!” Dean shouts, “SAMMY!”
Sam turns at the sound of his name and runs up to Dean and Castiel. “Uh, why are you guys wearing nothing but your underwear in the woods?”
“I don’t know Sammy. Cas and I just woke up here. I can’t remember anything from yesterday.” Dean tells his brother.
“I know what happened. Apparently the memory curse doesn’t affect angels.” Castiel tells the brothers. “Dean and I went to a bar last night, and the bar had a mechanical bull.”
“Oh, wow a mechanical bull! How awesome is that?” Dean says excitedly.
“Yeah, you said the same thing last night, Dean. Anyway, Dean dared me to ride the bull. I knew if my vessel had full range of motion I would have more success at riding through the bucks.
“So I removed my trench coat, suit jacket, tie, and shirt. I still had my wifebeater on to preserve my vessel’s decency. I also removed my shoes and socks and hiked up my pants to help with gripping the bull between my legs. Dean must have been impressed with my performance because I could feel his eyes fixed on me while I rolled my hips through every buck that bull took me on.
“After my turn, I asked Dean what he thought of my riding. He responded with some unintelligible swear words. I went to grab my shirt, but Dean grabbed me by the arm before I could put it back on. I turned to look at him, and Dean fixed his eyes on mine.
“Dean had lowered his voice to barely a whisper when he told me I made him jealous of the bull. I have heard trillions of romantic declarations during my existence, but Dean’s utterance was easily the most romantic thing ever said by your species. So I kissed Dean. I haven’t kissed a lot but I thought the kiss was good, and that I would like to keep kissing Dean for the next several eons until the Sun consumed the Earth and we both became stardust.
“I was relieved to find out Dean seemed to also have a good opinion on the kiss, because we kept on kissing. We let our tongues lazily discover the sensation of slowly tracing out each other’s mouths. The sensation was very enjoyable.”
“That’s nice, Cas. But I think we should focus on the part of your memories that deals with you guys getting cursed,” Sam tells Castiel.
Dean gives Sam a bitchface and then tells Castiel, “Just ignore Sammy, Cas. I want to hear more about the things we did last night,” Dean says with something that sounds like longing in his voice.
“So eventually,” Castiel continues, “Dean wanted a turn at the bull too. He decided to follow my method and also stripped down to his undershirt. Dean hopped onto the bull and then waved me over asking me to join him.”
“Um... is this really relevant to getting cursed?” Sam asks.
“Shhh, don’t interrupt Sammy,” Dean says. “How did things go with the two of us on the bull Cas?”
“It was a little different from riding the bull solo,” Castiel reflects. “I got in position in front of you. And we leaned into each other in rhythm with the mechanical bucks. Our legs tangled together as we thrust through the motion. Dean wrapped one arm around my waist, and I gripped his arm back with one of mine.”
“My vessel began getting aroused from the whole experience. And I could feel evidence of Dean’s arousal each time he rolled his hips behind me. Dean suggested we go to the Impala at this point.”
“Holy shit Cas! I do not want to hear about you and my brother having sex in the Impala,” Sam complains.
“Well, then you are in luck Sam because we did not get that far. We had stripped off everything left but our underwear. I hadn’t realized what a brilliant construction the human somatosensory system was before last night. Every nerve receptor was set on fire from the feel of Dean’s finger tips touching my skin. Dean asked if his touches felt good, and I tried to make the most eloquent response possible with a ragged moan. I had once thought soulmates spending eternity in Heaven with just each other for company probably got boring. But last night I felt like spending forever in the Impala with Dean would be the most wonderful thing imaginable. And that forever wouldn’t be nearly enough time.
“But then this drunk guy stumbled and bumped into the Impala. I recognized him as the witch we were hunting. Dean and I burst out of the backseat to run the witch down. We ended up chasing him into these woods, but we both ran a little slower than usual because we didn’t have any footwear protecting our feet.
“Our delay gave the witch ahead of us enough time to cast a spell. The effects of the spell caused us both to go unconscious, and apparently also caused Dean to lose his memories. But I know all the witch’s info, so we should go to his family’s home to break the curse. Then Dean will get his memories back, and we can pick up where we left off.”
“Fuck yeah, let’s go already,” Dean agrees.
“Okay, okay just meet me by the road up 1/4 mile where it stays close to the woods. You can jump in the back seat of my rental car without being seen by anyone.” Sam says.
“Awesome, Sammy we will see you in a few minutes then.” Dean tells his brother. Sam nods and turns away to walk over to the parking lot on the far end of the park.
Dean and Castiel begin to walk further into the woods in the direction Sam pointed to them. Dean looks over at his friend and smiles at Castiel, and Castiel can feel the heat rushing to his vessel’s face. Dean reaches a hand out, and Castiel smiles softly back to Dean as he tenderly entwines their fingers together.
Dean thought about how he had been wanting to kiss Castiel ever since he had met him, and now he was pissed that some asshole witch had taken that away from him. But holding Castiel’s hand helped simmer the rage building in his blood. Castiel always helped ground him when everything else seemed to spiral out of control. He wished he could remember the feel of Castiel’s lips on his own.
Dean pauses on the trail, and he looks at Castiel and says almost shyly, “Cas, I was thinking we could try another first kiss before I get my memories back.”
“I would like that, Dean,” Castiel says with a smile.
“Only thing is, I should have asked Sam for a mint because I’m sure I got some wicked morning breath,” Dean laments.
“I’m an angel of the lord, Dean. I can fix morning breath,” Castiel says. Castiel continues to hold Dean’s hand with one of his own, and reaches his other hand towards Dean’s face. He then traces a finger over Dean’s lips. Dean playfully catches Castiel’s finger with his mouth and sucks down on it. Dean is rewarded with a sexy moan from Castiel, and the feeling of clean, minty freshness on his teeth and tongue. Castiel’s finger is let free from Dean’s mouth, and Dean resolutely determines to give Castiel a kiss that an immortal being would remember for the rest of their existence.
~~
Sam has been waiting on the side of the road for the past 45 minutes. He figures he knows exactly what is happening in the woods, and although he is happy that his brother and best friend found love, having to wait while they are hooking up is not how he wants to spend his morning. He considers driving back to the motel and leaving Dean and Castiel to walk back on their own.
And Sam chuckles at the thought of a billion year old angel doing the walk of shame with his brother. Fighting the supernatural takes a lot more away from the brothers, than it ever gives. But sometimes the universe conspires to make everything fun and ridiculous again. Sam checks the trunk for a duffle bag with a couple sets of spare clothes. He drops the bag and a burner phone in a place where it seems obvious from the woods, but isn’t visible to passing motorists.
Sam gets back in the driver seat and starts the car. As he drives back to the motel, he enjoys laughing to himself every time he thinks of Dean’s face when he realizes he’ll be walking back to the motel.
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cromulentbookreview · 3 years
Text
I See What You Did There
What’s two plus two?
Huh? What? What’s happening?
What’s two plus two?
Oh, shit, right, I have a book review blog, don’t I? I mean, things have been a bit hectic these past few months and I’m also trying to be a real writer...
What’s two plus two?
Yeah, you’re right, I shouldn’t neglect my tumblr, even if nobody reads it. And come on, computer, it’s not like I’ve been in a coma for four years, two plus two is clearly five and we all love Big Brother, OK? Gah.
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Uhhh...And by that, I mean: Project Hail Mary by Andy Weir!
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Dr. Ryland Grace wakes up in a spaceship with no memory of how or why he’s there. He’s a junior high school science teacher, what the hell is he doing on a spaceship? Also, the other two astronauts are dead. Like, really dead. So far as how things are going for Dr. Grace right now, I’ll let Pete Campbell give you a hint:
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Slowly, veeeery slowly, Grace’s memory starts to come back to him: he’s on a mission to save the Earth. There’s this nasty space bacteria-thingy called Astrophage that’s dimming the light of Mr. Burns’s archnemesis: the Sun.
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There’s a lot of science involved, but Weir explains, in great detail, just how Astrophage dims the Sun and why that’s really, really, really, really bad for the Earth. Like, apocalyptic-bad. Billions will die bad. Famine, disease, war, rocks fall, everyone dies and freezes to death bad. Only not right away. Over the course of several years. So everyone will die, but they’ll get to do it real slowly. 
Yay?
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Like so, but it ends with everybody dead and the Earth being rendered uninhabitable. All of Grace’s wee little students will grow up watching their Earth slowly die. Unless Project Hail Mary finds a solution. And there seems to be a solution out there - Tau Ceti seems to be the only star not infected with Astrophage. Why? How? What? So this all powerful woman called Stratt, who has been given authority by just about everyone (how? Reasons. Don’t ask questions) yanks Grace out of his classroom - first to study Astrophage, and then, somehow, he can’t remember exactly, roped him into going on a dozen-light-year journey to Tau Ceti with the crew of the Hail Mary.
Only the rest of the crew is dead. Something went wrong while they were in a coma during their four-year space voyage. Grace is alone.
Inside the Hail Mary.
Full of a dude called Grace.
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I see what you did there, Weir. Don’t think I didn’t see what you did there. I mean, you don’t even have to be Catholic to see what you did there.
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Anyway, long-winded flashbacks and lots of science ensues. I struggled with the first quarter of the book - not for any particular reason other than I started reading this book in the latter half of 2020 and I was having a hell of a time concentrating on...well, everything. Remember 2020? Yeah, it wasn’t great. I mean, I’d need a lot of “not great, Bob!” gifs to describe just how bad those last few months of 2020 were.
And then I thought 2021 would be better. Ahahaha we barely made it six days. Seriously, everything is terrible and how do I even concentrate on a dumb book blog let alone a book all about science and the Earth slowly dying because the sun is dimming and -
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Soon enough, however, Grace spots something on the Hail Mary’s radar. It’s...another spaceship? All the way out by Tau Ceti? At first, Grace thinks maybe its another ship from Earth, like a backup plan, that’d make sense, right? Only it’s not.
Who could it be?
Aliens?
Yeah, it’s aliens.
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Our friend Grace gets to be the dude to make first contact with the sentient, spider-like creatures of the first planet in the system 40 Eridani. Turns out 40 Eridani is also infected with Astrophage, which is causing all sorts of problems for the Eridians, and their ship just happened to be around Tau Ceti at the exact same time as the Hail Mary. Crazy, right? Anyway, after the initial first contact and the long, drawn-out process of learning to communicate with one another (with no help from Amy Adams or Jeremy Renner), Grace and the lone Eridian, whom Grace christens Rocky, team up to save their respective worlds.
Science and plenty of flashbacks ensue.
I’m not a scientist - well, I have a master’s degree in library and information science, which, I guess, is a science? I mean, uh...I could tell you where all the sciency books are in the library. 500s if you’re using Dewey, and if you’re using Library of Congress, it will depend on what you’re looking for - you’ll want to start with Q for general sciences, QA for math books, QB and QC for astronomy and physics, QE, GC, GB, QC, TN for earth sciences, QD, TN, TP, and TR for chemical sciences, GE and bits of GF, QE, QH, QC, and TD for environmental sciences, QH, QK, QL, QM, QP, and QR for life sciences, QA75-76.9, TK5101-TK6720, TK7800-TK7895, and Q334-Q390 for computer sciences, telecommunication and artificial intelligence, Q, R, S, and T for the history of sciences and if you’re looking for bibliographies and finding aids for topics in the sciences, look under Z.
You know. Science.
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OK, so I may not be a scientist. I may be bad at math because numbers somehow magically switch themselves around on paper whenever I look at them. Why? Because my brain sucks, that’s why. I may have spent most of my chemistry classes reading YA books under my desk (worth it!). I may have only passed high school physics by cheating off a girl younger than I was, but hey, the joke was on me: my high school physics teacher wasn’t even qualified to teach physics.
Gotta love rural public schools.
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My point is, while the science may be lost on me and my brain which is full mostly of Simpsons quotes rather than actual knowledge, I do loves me a fun story where Science (with a capital S) saves the day. And, make no mistake, this book is fun. You might get a bit bogged down by the science, but once you get past it, this is a highly enjoyable story of one dangerously unqualified guy desperately trying to save the world with his new BFF, alien spider guy who speaks in musical notes. It’s up to them and them alone. Good luck, guys! Don’t forget that billions upon billions of lives depend on you. No pressure.
Seriously, if you loved The Martian, you’ll love Project Hail Mary. They’re similar, but Hail Mary is on a much larger scale than The Martian - there’s a lot more at stake in the hands of one guy. Plus: aliens!
Without spoiling anything, I’ll just say I would have loved more from the ending. I would’ve loved an epilogue from some of the other character’s perspectives or something. I mean, I could even go with a sequel! Maybe something where Erid and Earth are finally able to communicate? There’s a lot of potential for short stories or novellas set in the same world as Project Hail Mary - there’s got to be bonus material there and I want it. More, please? That’d be nice. I’d definitely read it. So... Hop to it, Weir!
One last complaint: Grace doesn’t swear. Like, at all. Meanwhile, Mark Watney is over here like
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Come on, Grace, would it kill you to say “fuck” or “shit” every now and again? I mean, I sipped coffee that was too hot and let out a bunch of words that’d make a 19th century whaler blush. Geez.
RECOMMENDED FOR: Fans of The Martian, science-y people, people who enjoy a heavy dose of science in their sci-fi, people who just want a fun story
NOT RECOMMENDED FOR: People with no mind for science, people who are against fun, anyone who doesn’t like sci-fi, aliens, fun, etc.
RATING: 4/5
ALIEN RATING:
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RELEASE DATE: May 4, 2021 (HEY! Don’t think I didn’t see what you did there, too, Ballantine Books!)
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ANTICIPATION LEVEL FOR SPINOFFS / SEQUELS / BONUS MATERIAL OF ANY KIND: Olympus Mons.
DID I SEE WHAT YOU DID THERE?
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grlfriends · 3 years
Text
revolutionary girl utena review
ep 1-5
the plot is actually kinda different from what I thought ?? in my mind the plot was: utena was a girl in a princess school who each and every princess would be "conquered" (for a lack of better words rn) in a ceremonial duel by a prince who fancied them, maybe she didnt wanna wanna marry anyone or she liked Anthy already but anyway in my mind utena showed up in the ceremony with duel clothing and then, in a very brave tm like-scene, she would openly declare she refused to be conquered by anyone and tbh I'm not even sure how Anthy would come into the plot... but back into what actually happened in the episodes everything so far is very introductory and just showing what mechanics will be explored further down the line I think?? the op is really good too
also every boy so far reminds me so much of knights of the zodiac?? maybe it's just the design I guess...) and nanami can get these hands, jealousy is a disease and she's the sickest person on earth for all I know
dont ask me why bit I just feel like room of mirrors - gfriend has a very well fitting vibe for it but I'm not exactly sure why hm.... 🤔🤔
ep 6-12
ok so why does this school just have random animals around 😐 I could understand the horse but a bull and a kangaroo?? what ...
touga just says the most random dramatic things and then just casually says anyone who believes in friendship is a fool ?? the guy wouldnt last a day in the naruto universe tbh, he kinda irks me in some way but I'm not sure why so I'll live with this strange feeling for a while I guess
↳ okay so watching ep 10 made me especially kinda creeped out, I know I've watched only 10 eps so far but like can he fall downstairs and break a neck or something already ...
also haha what if I watched that bet on it fmv and gave myself a bunch of spoilers would that be funny or what 😍 this is why i cant have nice things yall.... hope my memory goes to shit when sleep so I dont remember about it this week while I finish it
I feel like the main thing on the episodes are parallels, one way or another I always feel like they're setting up parallels and giving me clues for a bigger picture and a deeper plot arc that is still to come and the bet on it fmv just made this impression stronger, also I wanna say it's done in a good way, one that is both mysterious (??) and "honey you've got a big storm coming" at the same time 🤔🤔 much to think about honestly
↳ just saw ep 11 and even though I already knew this was coming sooner or later it still felt like crap seeing utena lose to dick head, at the end of the episode when he says anthy was always just reflecting utena's own wishes for himemiya (in another way bc I dont remenber the exact words) it felt like 😐 bc yes I knew that (the way she was working her thoughts was simply a copy and paste of what utena was saying) at all time I kept those essays about anthy in my head, I dont think theyll be truly relatable to what I'm seeing rn but yeah anthy rights (even though I know you betray/cheat on utena down the line bc of the bet on it fmv but I'm sure you had your own motivation)
↳ saw ep 12 bc I just couldnt handle being in a cliffhanger and yeah it happened what I absolutely thought it would lmao not that it was that difficult to foresee but yeah, I kinda liked how utena did it for her instead of being like "oh I wanna save anthy from touga" and treating her like a damsel in distress (I know that's kinda her position as the rose bride for what I've been told so far and that this is a subject spoken about in many many essays on tumblr but yeah) bc so far she's been treated as a trophy and a way to get something else, for the green haired guy it was a way to see something eternal, for miki it was a way to hold on into his "shining thing" and for touga it seems (so far) like a way to manipulate (just like he does with nanami) and just mark his position as above everyone else as he seems to view himself?? man I might be saying random stuff rn but it kinda does makes sense in my mind with the information I've had to this point
ep 13-25
honestly 😐😐 through 9 whole episodes I felt like they were trying to make the side characters deeper and show their hidden face and motivations but it felt so shallow...... not even actually shallow, just not deep enough that it would make me care about these characters and the fact there was no actual build to showing us why we're getting to know these characters backgrounds was just kinda meh too, didnt really help that all episodes had all the same formula and the same timing just for the developers made in those episodes be forgotten at the end and also just that pink haired guy could be like "ah failure again", it felt like watching the same episode over and over again, it was really tiring and like?? girl help I do not care about these characters at all, I feel like it could have been done well (like the keiko ep in comparison to the furuba chapter that deals with the yuki appreciation (??) club president graduating.... the way this ep was done and setup didn't really bring me any emotions) overall not to my taste and tbh I feel like I could have skipped all those episodes except for maybe the miki and juri one so 😑
all nanami focused episodes are the worst so far, she's so boring and I cant stand now annoying she is, the diary episode?? the cow episode?? the episode when tsuwabiki fuels with utena?? honestly I know they're trying to show me a better and different side of her but it just doesnt!! work!! bc i feel no sympathy for her, my biggest wish rn is her and touga just disappearing and no more filler episodes🗣🗣
I thought akio was utena's prince?? but apparently he's just anthy's brother and like.. I'm do done with his little talks with utena and yadda yadda, I just wanna see their duel is that too much to ask I'm dying over here (if this lenga lenga continues until ep 25 i will be so mad bc why were so many episodes wasted on such boring and and not necessary side characters backstories?? idc about them at all man aaaaaaaaaa)
↳ ep 25 was good finally we got what we deserve boys 😭😭😭😭😭 can utena just beat up akio already I'm tired of his ass, he exhales both "I'm a feminist I even take women studies classes #herstory" and "if she breathes she's a thot" energy also he has 0 style that mullet is simply horrible I bet there's a hairstylist community who considers him a criminal bc like 😐 it is simply so bad (q bit less when it's tied up but when it's all lose jesus Christ)
also touga thinks he's suuuuch a genius, sooo smart like king, I do not care about you at all can you shut the fuck up please and can we tall about the pink haired guy episode?? wack. honestly thought it would be more emotional or something, I binge watched 12 episodes with his ugly haircut face and did not even feel a thing he can choke I guess ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
ANTHY TAKING A SWORD OUT OF UTENA'S CHEST??? OSCAR WORTHY KINGS❗❗❗and then her lame ass brother being like "oh ho ho idk idk" shut up no one cares no one cares I swear to you no one cares shut uuuuup
ep 25-39
first of all, ep 25 was good but kinda reminded me of the nine episodes (13 until 21) where absolutely nothing interesting happened so I hope I'm wrong also can I just say just seeing the preview of the next episode made me roll my eyes so bad I almsot saw my brain?? bc yeah I'm fucking tired of nanami fosuced episodes she's so annoying oh my god nobody cares about a goddamn egg and much less one coming from her let her die or something pls she's so annoying there's nothing I've learned about her that was not against my own will I'm basically rotting over here 🤒
↳ ep 30 has me thinking Akio has a foot fetish or something 😐 bruh leave utena aloooooone I already know your plans and schemes you're not fooling anyone that's embarrassing for u and also... utena you're not very bright are you.... you start seeing every duelist you face with the same exact car and then when you see akio has the same car you didnt even stop to think about it that 1+1 equals 2 ... girl help yourself 😐
↳ yet again another nanami focused ep 😐😐😐😐😐 even though I do understand her better now I still don't find her particularly enjoyable to watch, call me a woman hater but like. idk she's still a bit annoying to me (but touga is straight up evil and is manipulating her so I feel bad for feeling like that tho.....)
↳ ok last 2 eps to go but listen. I thought the akio duel would have happened much sooner, maybe on ep 33 max but well didn't this age well lmao ngl, it did seem a bit too slow paced for my personal taste but also I feel like there's a certain level of drama that comes with slowing the pace down....
↳ aaaaaa yall I'm kinda 😢😭 over the ending omg........... even though it took the best of me to keep going in some parts I still enjoyed the ending aaaaa I thought i wouldnt really like it bc I just usually dont enjoy this type of ending but stil 😢😢😢😢 wait for me utena 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 girl I cried and then anthy walking in the end god utena and anthy holding hands 😭😭😭😭 akio can suck my dick
there's obviously many things I've missed or that I kinda didnt really pay attendance to so please dont take this serious, I was just writing as I watched the episodes so it's more like a thought compilation than anything, still I can see why there's many essays written about it and why it is held as a masterpiece by so many people
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enragedbees · 4 years
Text
Wretched/Deluded
Pairing: Prinxiety, side Logicality
Summary: As Virgil helps Logan get ready for a date, he reminisces back to when they first met in high school.
Warnings: Swearing (If I missed anything, please let me know!)
Words: 3030
Song rec: Factories by Autoheart (This is less of a theme for this chapter, but more of the theme I’m using for the fic in its entirety!)
A huge thanks to the lovely @fall-sunflowers for being my beta reader!!
Taglist: @xionbean @thenewlarislynn @emo-disaster @darkstrange-son @starwarsdestroyedme
I love reading your comments! Please let me know what you think! :)
Read the companion to this story!
Next
——————————————-
Chapter 1: To Put Together Me
         ~ -222 days from The Beginning ~
Virgil heard the front door of his apartment slam shut.
        He switched the tab on his laptop from Tumblr to LinkedIn and got up from the couch, leaving the screen open and facing out as if to prove that he’d been doing what he was supposed to. His roommate walked through the kitchen, grinning.
        “Hey.” Virgil walked across the room and leaned against the wall. “You look happy.”
        “I am.” Logan opened the refrigerator and grabbed a water bottle. “I have a date tonight.”
        Virgil grinned. “You finally asked that guy you met?”
        “‘Finally’ seems rather melodramatic. I waited a perfectly reasonable amount of time before asking him out.” Logan cracked his water bottle open. “I’ve only known him for two weeks.”
        “And for two weeks you haven’t stopped talking about him.”
        Logan rolled his eyes. He took a drink and set the bottle down. “How goes the job hunt?”
        Virgil grimaced and sat back down on the couch. “I can’t find anything worthwhile.”
        “Maybe I can ask Patton tonight if he knows of anyone who’s hiring.” Logan offered. “He knows the city well.”
        Virgil scoffed. “You can’t ask that on a first date. He’ll think that’s the only reason you took him out.”
        Logan’s eyes widened. “Okay, I won’t.”
        Virgil grabbed his laptop. “When are you picking him up?”
        Logan checked his watch. “About two and a half hours.”
        “And what are you wearing?”
        Logan looked down at what he had on. “I was just going to wear this.”
        Virgil stopped. “You’re kidding, right?”
        “No. What’s wrong with it?”
        Virgil shook his head, eyes wide. “You can’t wear your daytime clothes on a date! Especially not when he’s already seen you in them that day. Do you want to look like you don’t care about going out with him?”
        “Well, obviously, not,” muttered Logan.
        Virgil sighed loudly and stood up. ”Come on, I’ll find you something.” He clasped Logan on the shoulder. “I guess some things never change.”
        Logan rolled his eyes, but he was smiling. “It’s not like I’m helpless without you.”
“You’d like to think that, wouldn’t you?” Virgil lightly pushed against Logan into his room and started to rifle through Logan’s closet.
~
        ~ -3110 days from The Beginning ~
Virgil Terek had no friends.
        And he was okay with that. He enjoyed being alone.
        It’s not like he wasn’t likable. He wasn’t an outcast. People were nice to him and he was polite back.
        Virgil just didn’t make an effort to put himself near other people. If he auditioned for the school musical, he’d be immediately adopted by the theater kids. Same with choir, or art, or any kind of sport, all things he could excel at. He simply didn’t want to.
        Virgil didn’t want to join a group where he’d always be on the outside. He might have had a couple friends, but he was too far behind to ever be a part of some tight-knit collection of people who had been in that club together since childhood. Virgil would sit with them at lunch, hang out with them on the weekends, go to their birthday and graduation parties. But they wouldn’t ask to work with him on group projects in class. They wouldn’t pick him for their team in gym. Every time they made plans, it would be, “Oh, and you can come too, if you want, Virgil.”
        And it was far too dangerous to have a single best friend, instead of a group of people. Virgil would never depend so much on one person. He’d just get hurt when they left for someone else.
        Virgil was happy where he was. At lunch he sat in silence with the other kind-of-loners like him and did homework. At home, he read or wrote or listened to music or watched television or dicked around on his phone. Virgil was content.
        The lack of friends eliminated distractions from what really mattered to Virgil. He could focus on what he wanted to do, and never had to worry about not having enough free time to do it.
Virgil Terek entered the ninth grade with complete indifference. By that point, he had learned his place in the world. As long as he maintained his grades and took all his required courses and interacted with his parents every once in awhile, nobody bothered him. He was free.
        And Virgil had never had a problem maintaining his grades. Being categorized as a “gifted student” sometime in elementary school, he never struggled with completing an assignment or needed to study for tests. Virgil was placed in the advanced classes throughout elementary and middle school and had no problem breezing through them without trying or even enjoying it.
        He took Geometry CP freshman year because it was the logical next step. He had no idea how much different an advanced high school course was from an advanced middle school course. When Virgil didn’t immediately understand a concept, he didn’t ask for help. When he only halfway understood the quadratic formula or didn’t memorize the order of the postulates and theorems, he didn’t study, because he had never had to before, and everything worked out on its own. Virgil started getting the worst test grades he had ever received in his life.
        A few weeks into the course, he was barely pulling a D+. His parents and teacher kept getting on his case, Virgil didn’t know how to fix his grades, and he felt his freedom slipping away.
        Other students complained near him about doing poorly, but their worst was always a grade Virgil would kill to have again. And the most annoying part was the new student in his class who never complained, who never was unprepared or confused, who seemed to have already mastered every topic in the course yet participated and accomplished classwork with vigor like it was the most interesting thing going on in his life.
        Over the course of a few weeks, Virgil saw his irrational hatred of the kid intensify. Every time he got a poor test grade or failed assignment, he grew angrier at the kid who had no problems with the material. Everything about him annoyed Virgil. He was a freshman who had just moved into town, and he was still better than Virgil. He was very tall and very thin, which should have made him awkward, but he wasn’t. He dressed every day like he was going to work, tie and all. He spoke so professionally, almost robotically. He was stuck up and arrogant and took every chance he could to correct someone. But he had an A+ in Geometry.
        Virgil, slumped at his desk in class while the teacher passed back their most recent tests, let these thoughts stew. He begrudgingly took the paper his teacher handed back to him, upside down and folded, with a stern but encouraging glance in Virgil’s direction. Virgil grimaced and turned it over.
        A big red D- sat leeringly at the top of the page. Virgil sighed. He looked to the front of the room at the new kid, who was flipping through the test, observing it with noticeable interest, looking over the unmarked pages before setting it back on the desk with an obvious A+ at the top.
        Virgil rolled his eyes to himself. None of his closest acquaintances were in the same math class, and he didn’t feel comfortable asking the sophomores and juniors in the period for help. This kid who didn’t know Virgil and therefore, didn’t have a reason to turn him away, might have been Virgil’s only chance to get his life back to normal.
        He groaned inwardly. He wished he had another option.
        When the period ended, Virgil walked up to the kid, who was packing up his backpack.
        “Hey, how’d you do on the test?” Virgil asked. He hated small talk, but he was about to ask a complete stranger for help, and Virgil felt that he at least owed it to the kid.
        “I got one-hundred percent,” answered the boy. Virgil resisted the urge to roll his eyes.
        “Cool. I didn’t do so well.” Virgil slung his backpack over his shoulder and they walked out of the classroom. “I’m Virgil, by the way.”
        The kid furrowed his brow. “Like the poet? What kind of a name is that?”
        Virgil glared at him. He decided didn’t need straight A’s that badly. “Alright, fuck off.” He started to walk away.
        “Wait, I’m sorry.” The other boy at least looked sheepish. “I don’t have much of a filter or an understanding of social etiquette. I tend to speak whatever I’m thinking without realizing the effects of what I say.”
        Jesus, this kid. Virgil was sure he had just recited that from a textbook he picked up somewhere. He sighed. “Okay. I don’t think that makes it better, though.”
        The kid stuck his hand out. “Pleased to meet you, Virgil. My name is Logan Schlenke.”
        Virgil gingerly shook his hand and they continued down the hallway. “Okay, so here’s the deal. I’m kind of doing really badly in Geo and I can’t help but notice that you know what you’re doing.” He sighed. “Is there any way you can help me when I don’t understand what’s going on?”
        “You want me to tutor you?” asked Logan. “Sure, I can do that.”
        “It’s not tutoring, I just want a little help with the content.”
        “That would be called tutoring,” Logan offered.
        “No, I don’t need –” He stopped himself and gritted his teeth. “Fine, whatever, call it tutoring,” Virgil muttered. He bit his lip. “But you’ll do it?”
        Logan stopped. He looked at Virgil thoughtfully. “I’ll help you under one condition.”
        “Seriously?” Virgil groaned. “What is it?”
        “It’s become evident to me that in order to have a productive and enjoyable high school career, one must be on good terms with their classmates,” Logan said. “I’ll help you understand Geometry if you help me to understand how to interact with people.”
        Virgil raised an eyebrow. “I don’t think I’m your best choice to learn people skills, man. I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I kind of keep to myself and don’t talk to anybody else.”
        “That’s not true,” Logan commented. “I’ve seen you talking with lots of people and everyone likes you. Besides, I don’t want or need actual friends. I just need to get along with the other students in the school.”
        Damn. This kid. Virgil was already regretting the decision. There had to be an easier way to pass Geo.
        He let out a breath. “Okay. I’ll help you.”
        Logan stuck his hand out again, and Virgil shook it. “It’s a deal,” Logan smiled.
        The two exchanged contact information, and Logan walked into his next class, leaving Virgil shaking his head in the hallway.
        Over the next few days, Logan went to Virgil’s house after school and worked with him on the content they learned in class.
        “Your main problem seems to be that you never learned how to study,” Logan noted. “If you practice teaching yourself the concepts you don’t understand in class, soon you won’t need someone to reteach it to you.”
        Virgil scoffed. “Why should I teach myself something when there’s a teacher getting paid to do it?”
        “Teachers or other professionals are useful to help explain a concept to students. Not all teaching styles work on everyone, so sometimes it’s necessary to find out how you learn best and teach it to yourself,” Logan explained, maintaining a remarkable amount of patience. “You should also pay attention in class more often.”
        Virgil tried to help Logan interact in social situations, but he had no idea how to teach him, or if any of what he knew would work for Logan. Logan tried his best, though, putting the same effort into studying people skills that he did in his schoolwork.
        “So, maybe, when you want to say something, just…don’t, for a bit. Until you think it over and decide it’s an acceptable thing to say,” Virgil offered.
        Logan’s eyes narrowed. “You don’t think I’ve tried that?”
        Virgil rolled his eyes. “Look, dude, I’m not really sure how it works for you, anyway. But if you want people to like you, you can’t say things that make you look like an asshole. Just…calibrate, I guess.”
        Logan’s eyebrow raised, but he said nothing. He jotted something down in a notebook.
        “And you have to lose the tie.”
        “Why?” asked Logan, genuinely confused.
        “Nobody wears ties to school unless they have to dress up. Don’t you own, like, a single t-shirt or something?”
        Horror flashed across Logan’s face. “Why would I wear a t-shirt to school?”
        “So you look like a normal human teenager and not a child trying to run for president.”
        Logan pursed his lips but wrote in his notebook again.
        Virgil took a breath. “Tomorrow, try wearing jeans, a nice t-shirt, and an unzipped hoodie. And brush your bangs forward a bit, your hair doesn’t have to all be going in the same direction.”
        Logan looked at Virgil like he had told Logan to wear nothing but a bathrobe to school, but he wrote it all down.
        And the next day, Logan walked up to Virgil at his locker, wearing skinny jeans with a brown belt, a long-sleeve gray and white raglan, and a green hoodie. He had his hair swept to the side, falling gently over his forehead, just high enough so it didn’t impede his vision.
        “Whoa.” Virgil grinned at Logan.
        Logan smiled sheepishly back, hands in the pockets of his hoodie. “I feel ridiculous.”
        “You look great, man,” said Virgil. And he really meant it. He could already feel a difference in the energy surrounding Logan. He could feel the other students no longer seeing him as an outlier or a stranger, but as someone who could be anyone else in the school. He’s one of us, they seemed to think out loud.
        And, for the first time, Virgil realized that Logan was actually a really attractive guy. He just hadn’t known how to express himself. For some reason, Logan had tried to confine himself to a professional, more mature style. But in this outfit, he looked comfortable, relaxed, more laid-back and easygoing. Though he was almost definitely nervous of switching up his style so suddenly, Virgil could see in the way he carried himself that Logan felt more like himself in this outfit, not trying to prove to everyone that he’s someone he’s not.
        They began walking down the hallway. “The most important thing about wearing this today is being confident in it. It won’t have as much of an impact if you doubt yourself.” Virgil said. “I know it’s a big change, but you’ve got to believe that you do look good.”
        “You told me I did,” Logan said. “I have no reason to distrust you.”
        As they walked, a few kids in the opposite direction smiled or nodded hello to Logan. He smiled back
        “How do you feel?’ Virgil asked.
        “I feel good.” Logan nodded. “I had no idea how much something as small as what I wore could have an effect on how I’m perceived.”
        “You’re already starting to seem like a real person to the others,” Virgil smiled. “Keep this up and I’d bet anything you could get any girl in the school.”
        Logan laughed out loud. “We’ll see. How did you do on the pop quiz in Geometry yesterday?”
        “I got a B,” Virgil grinned.
        “Well, that’s certainly an improvement, but I know you can do more. Are you free again this afternoon?”
        Virgil sighed. God forbid he be proud of less than his best. “Yeah, my place again?”
        Logan nodded and turned into his first period classroom for the day.
        As the days passed, Virgil slowly grew more confident in his abilities to learn and understand things himself. He noticed that he started asking questions in class when he was lost, and he noticed seeing Logan smirk with pride every time.
        Logan slowly grew more accustomed to social interaction. His robotic syntax and word choice didn’t change, but with the change in style, it began to seem quirky and intelligent rather than just arrogant. And though he still, with nothing but good and helpful intentions, corrected anyone who was wrong about anything, Virgil helped him to do it without making the other person feel stupid. Logan made friends, built connections, and started making a place for himself in the school.
        Virgil soon became confident in his ability to study and learn things on his own, which was a huge source of pride for him. He didn’t think he’d ever be able to properly study. As one last benchmark, Logan went an entire chapter without tutoring or explaining anything to Virgil.
        At the end of the chapter, his teacher handed him his test, upside down, with a pleased smile. Virgil turned over the paper to see a 96% A crowning the top.
        Virgil ran up to Logan at the end of the class as they walked out together. “I can’t believe I did it!”
        Logan grinned. “Congratulations.”
        “Man, I could not have done this without you. Thank you so much for everything,” said Virgil.
        “You’re welcome.”
        Virgil pulled his phone out. “Do you want to come over today? I have to text my mom but I know she’ll be fine with it.”
        Logan furrowed his eyebrows. “Is there another class you’re having trouble with?”
        “What?” Virgil looked up at him. “No, no. Not for studying. Just to hang out.”
        Logan raised his eyebrows.
        “Like, for fun?” Virgil continued.
        Logan’s face lit up. “Okay. Sure.”
        He turned and walked away, beaming. As Virgil watched him go, a realization hit him. He had been trying for so long to get his life back to normal, back to being alone and untethered. But now, he’d never be able go back to that life.
        “Goddamn,” he muttered.
        Virgil Terek had one friend.
        He walked away, shaking his head and laughing at himself, but unable to keep a smile off his face.
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simptasia · 4 years
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there are lots of couples in lost (and i adore most of them), so why am i so fixated on daniel/charlotte? they’re not one of the prominent pairings and they're technically not even a couple, they’re love interests who had potential
well im gonna make a list about it. this isn’t me feeling the need to justify myself or being self conscious. legit, nobody’s ever asked. which is surprising but nice. people just let me roll however i want. i just like making lists. and i like dan/char. like, a lot. a lot more than the source material kinda deserves
i love daniel faraday. i fucking adore daniel faraday
i love charlotte lewis... welllll okay i love the concept of charlotte. she sadly was under utilized as a character (and bex was wasted as an actress, which is sad cuz she’s really great). like, when talking about char, the word “implied” comes up a lot. so i like the idea of char. the vision i have of her in my head. legit a lot of char to me is fanon, exaggeration of canon, and some projecting of myself and bits of her actress  not entirely an oc, i’m working with her as a base. which is: beautiful scientist lady in love with daniel faraday. thats more than enough for me to work with!
nerds in love. nerds in love! media has soaked us with that stupid “all nerds are virgins” trope that ppl don’t realise something very important: NERDS LOVE NERDS AND BANG NERDS AND MAKE BABY NERDS
gentle soft spoken not physically inclined boy + loud outspoken adventurous girl pairing. it’s about the contrast
gorgeous lady in wuv with and attracted to the scrawny nerdy guy pleases me. i mean, this trope but not played for like, laughs or whatever. and if you think char ain’t attracted to dan, well you haven’t looked at her face around him as much as i have. but to be fair, nobody has. anyways check out the scene of them meeting again in limbo for good smitten faces
by the time we meet them they’re already in love, like we didn’t see them meet or fall in love, their time on the boat, i REALLY wish we did but writer’s strike so NONETHELESS, i can use my imagination
they’re very protective of each other, i love that kinda thing
they’re very affectionate. lotsa touching each other. these two touching each other so often you’d swear they’re an Official Couple already
the trope of Everybody Realises They’re Into Each Other Except For Each Other. and like, they both love each other but don’t think it’d be reciprocated. please note that charlotte was genuinely fucking surprised that dan loves her. and that FASCINATES me
jeremy davies and rebecca mader are great actors and they just have chemistry. like, this shouldn’t work, the writers honestly didn’t give dan/char the attention they needed/deserved, but for what little we get of them, it still does work. and i gotta put that down to the actors. and props to bex, again, because she was given very little to work with
on the note of jer and bex, i have crushes on them and well, that fucking helps, don’t it. dan and char are beautiful and i [heart eyes]
they’re just really sweet together?? and they respect each other too. like they don’t talk down to each other. i feel like the world puts them in their slots: nutcase and bitch (ableism and sexism, basically), and treats them accordingly. but they'd never treat each other that way. they look out for each other. they enjoy being around each other! and they look at each other like the other is the most precious being on earth
and yeah i’ve just gotten in the habit of making headcanons and meta and imagining these two (and miles), like it’s really really easy and enjoyable
and really, having fun, that's what shipping is for. including shipping an underdeveloped side not-yet-couple from a show that ended ten years ago. other lost ships have waaay more to work with, way more to talk about but i dunno, i just like default to these two (and dan/char/miles) a lot. maybe cuz it’s easy to digest? because there’s not a lot in canon? that plus all the time i said above. sometimes i do feel weird that i talk about these two as much as i do, because the meanie in my head is like “What’s The Big Deal?” but ya know what? i’m having fun. and also: why not!
also there's angst. i forget to mention the angst. lost was kind enough to give me tragedy AND a way for them to live happily ever after!
there’s a bunch of little details about them that i could go on about (and likely have) but basically they’re cute nerds in love that would die for each other and if given the chance, would make a wonderful couple
epilogue: why do i add miles to this too?
because i fucking can
so basically
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fluidityandgiggles · 4 years
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Dalton Big Bang day 43 - Valentine
Writing Masterpost, AO3 Link
Notes: Also known as: Gigs tries to write jogan giving their son The Talk and failing miserably due to being a useless asexual.
One day. One fucking day. I'll write a full next gen fic, with all the kids, because y'all know by now I have headcanons for everything. And then y'all would get to see just how chaotic AJ Sotto and Parker Willis can be. But for now, this is about Johnny and his adorable Hanover boyfriend.
If there was a truth everyone in Dalton could agree on, it was that history teacher and Warblers coach, Mr. Wright, was a man you didn't want to cross. The unfortunate ones who were asked to meet with him privately refused to speak of what was told, and whether it was for good or bad reasons, nobody wanted to ask.
And then there were the students who visited his office without even being called. Johnny Larson-Wright, AJ Sotto, Parker Willis. Parker's older brothers graduated from Windsor and Stuart a few years ago, so that brand of crazy would make sense coming from them, but the others…
Well, Valentine Moore always thought people were crazy for assuming their teacher was such a bad man. He made Warblers practice enjoyable every time, gave people solos in a very fair manner, and yeah, maybe he was a bit strict. But he seemed nice enough.
But who was Valentine to say anything? He's never had a conversation alone with him. Maybe they were just exaggerating things!
Yeah, that had to be it!
...until the unfortunate day in late February when he was called in to Mr. Wright's office.
It was all everyone talked about the whole day. Johnny didn't make a fuss about it, unlike most of the others, which was reassuring and even more stressful in equal measures. Oh, how the mighty have fallen, straight-A student Valentine Moore must see the monster, maybe he fucked up real bad this time. Maybe they found out that he contributed to Johnny and AJ's bullshit—
No, wait, no. He does draw, it's his one coping mechanism, but no way they used his art for graffiti. Maybe… maybe it had to do with the homework he didn't turn in for history class? No, but he did it all, he just forgot his notebook by accident, Mr. Wright would probably understand! He must understand, it's not the first time, it's just—
"Stop pacing by my door, Moore," the teacher called, making Valentine freeze in place and start shaking. "You're not exactly invisible."
"I'm sorry, Mr. Wright." He just lowered his eyes and walked into the office, closing the door behind him. "Won't do so again."
"It's all good, I get that you're nervous. But there's nothing to be nervous about."
"Is it about the homework I forgot to turn in last week…?"
"No. I care less about the homework than I do about this subject." The teacher started tapping on the desk with his fingers, making Valentine shiver a bit more. "I understand you're seeing my son."
His stomach fell as his shaking stopped.
"I don't… what? No, you got it wrong, I just—"
"Wrong? Unless Johnny is dating another Valentine Moore, who goes to this school and boards in Hanover, and is a member of the Warblers, I have no reason to believe I got it wrong."
"I… I'll break up with him, sir, it's okay. I know I'm not…"
As Valentine started feeling tears fall down his cheek, he also felt a large hand take his, as he started a silent prayer in his mind.
"I'm not mad at you," Mr. Wright — Logan — told him. "In fact, I'm relieved. It seems like he's very serious about you. His father and I are very proud of him. But I'll tell you this. If you hurt my boy—"
"It's the end of me, I know. I'm so sorry, sir."
"...yeah. That's… yeah." As Valentine raised his eyes, he saw his teacher start to fumble a bit. That was unusual… "I didn't actually think I'll get this far, if I'm honest… I'm not allowed to hurt you, as your teacher. But do expect to have a talk again. If either of you get hurt. It's not just about him in this relationship, it's about you too."
"O— okay! Okay, thank you!"
"Now, about that homework—"
"Dad!" Interrupted a call as the door flung open, and in ran Johnny, red in the face and wholly amused. "AJ broke Ramsey's window by accident, we're gonna get killed! Help! Oh, hi Val!"
"Hi!" If Valentine smiled at that, it wasn't his fault. This was the best thing that happened today.
"I swear, when we got you into Stuart we hoped you'd do better than this," Mr. Wright sighed, getting up from his chair. "Excuse me, Moore, it seems like something more... urgent came up."
"Oh no, it's… it's all fine. I'll leave! It's okay!"
"I apologize, Moore."
As Valentine rushed to get up and leave, Logan put a hand on his son's shoulder, trying to make him calm down. The redness still persisted, but his smile cracked, and the twinkle of joy in his eyes teeny off as a blanket of disappointment fell on him.
"We're in trouble, aren't we?"
"You're not. AJ, though, is in so much trouble. Now show me the damage. I'll talk to Ramsey."
————
"So how are you guys doing?" Julian asked through FaceTime, watching his family eat dinner while he had his lunch break on set. Jerry, their newest cat, was also on the table to eat his own dinner. Natalie was paying more attention to him than she was to her dinner.
Johnny kinda wanted to poke her to answer him.
"We're all fine," Logan told him, ignoring the kids to a degree. "Did you watch the regionals video?"
"I did. So did half the cast. Good job on that. Nice song choices too, Squid."
"Thanks," Logan snorted, then turned to nudge Johnny. "Did you hear your pops?"
"I did." He went bright red. "I… I chose the second one."
Julian chuckled at that. "Yeah? No shit, Johnny. Was it inspired by someone special?"
"Yeah… I mean—"
"It certainly looked like it. Reminded me of the Hummel-Sottos back when we were juniors ourselves. Ugh, I can't listen to Raise Your Glass anymore without wanting to gag."
Johnny tried to hide. His dads were great, he never thought otherwise! Pops was the more lenient one, the more open one. The one with less dignity somehow. Probably from growing up in the spotlight and being in the public eye for so long. Dad was stricter, less… open, about all the embarrassing stuff, but he was also home more. Less absent than Pops. So he… knew more, about the kids. Pops was the one to go to with love problems, Dad was the one for any other issues.
Johnny loved them both equally. But they were both equally embarrassing, and that was a lot of embarrassing, and he really didn't want to talk to them about his love life.
"So who's the special someone?" Julian kept on teasing. "Who were you singing You're My Best Friend to?"
"Just…"
"Val," Natalie answered for him, making him choke. "He totally likes Valentine."
"Nat, shush."
"Well, did you tell him yet?" Julian raised an eyebrow, laughing a bit. "He doesn't seem like the guy to get… subtle flirting."
"He's my boyfriend now, okay?" Johnny snapped. "I… I told him. After the performance ended. And then we were together for Valentine's day and now we're together. Is that what you wanna hear?"
"...actually yes, that is what I want to hear. Honey, that's great! Does he make you happy? Do you two talk through your problems or do you keep them inside until you'll burn out like what happened when you were in fifth grade? Do you two fuck yet?"
"Pops!"
"Daddy! Ew!"
As Johnny pretended to gag, and Natalie ran off from the table to wash her mouth, Logan rolled his eyes with a smile and turned the call to face him more.
"They're doing alright, J. They're actually doing better than we did when we started going out. At least with the whole… communication thing."
"You assume we communicated ever," Julian joked, making Logan smile more. "I'm kidding… I'm just happy they're doing well. He seems like a good kid."
"Who, Valentine?"
"Yeah."
"He's great… a bit shy. Reminds me of Reed back when."
"Sounds like a blast. God… I miss you guys. I wanna be there, I wanna meet that kid honest and proper… would it be too weird to give them the sex talk through face cam?"
"I think it would be… a terrible idea, Jules. Please wait until you're back home."
"You forget I can still hear you guys!" Came the groan from Johnny, followed by a call from someone to remind Julian he needs to get dressed for his next scene.
"I love you too!" Julian called to Johnny, receiving a loud groan in return. "Lo, I love you so much."
"I love you too, J."
"I'll see you guys in a month, okay? Not too much left to wait. I'll try to find some of those Japanese kitkats you like."
"Thank you. Have a good day, Jules."
"Good night, Lo. Good night, kids!"
Logan hung up as Johnny mumbled a "yeah, yeah" and Natalie came back to the table, still gagging. 
"...okay, but did you?"
"Nat, I'm not answering that question!"
"Okay, sorry! Jeez!"
Yeah… this was his family now. Logan still struggled to believe this fact. But this was his family now.
————
"How about this argument stops now?" Johnny called right as Julian walked through the door that Saturday afternoon, to catch his husband and daughter standing on one couch and his son comforting a redhead stranger on the other. "It doesn't fucking matter who's a better partner for Mark, he's in a fucking coma. And besides, your screams are making him uncomfortable."
"Do I even want to know?" Julian asked as he dropped his bags, pulling Logan down from the couch so they could kiss. Much to the gagging noises coming from Natalie. "Hello, love."
"Hi, Jules."
"They're listening to The Bright Sessions again," Johnny tried to say, getting somewhat ignored. "It's just—"
"I'm going to my room!"
"Okay! Hello to you too, Natalie!"
That was all about an hour ago, and as things were now, Julian felt far more awake. He took a shower, unpacked his bags, made himself a cup of coffee and now got to cuddle with his husband and their three cats on the couch as their son tried his best to make his boyfriend feel comfortable. The boy didn't look the most reassured though, but at least he didn't seem like he's going to stress himself to death, so he figured it was okay.
"You met my pops before," Julian heard Johnny tell Valentine quietly. "Why are you so scared now?"
"Because I met him as your friend, and now I'm your boyfriend, it's not the same type of meeting!"
"He's right, it's not," Logan told the kids, laughing a bit. "It's scarier than meeting as a friend."
"Dad, you're not helping."
"It's also more relieving than you think, Moore. Trust me."
He sniffled and nodded, trying to calm down more. An uneasy feat, but one Logan and Johnny were sure he could accomplish.
"So… how are you?" Julian asked after a moment of silence, winking at Valentine. "I saw your regionals performance. You did good."
"Th— thank you!" He started blushing at that. "I… I'm good! I think, at least… How are you?"
"I'm very good, thank you for asking. So…" Julian chuckled, taking a bit of a shaky breath. "You're dating now, I heard."
Valentine could've died then and there.
"Dad had to tell him," Johnny tried to explain, but it didn't exactly work that well, as he watched his boyfriend try to hide as his pops kept on smiling.
"I'm not going to make fun of you, I just want to talk to you two. Make sure you know what you're doing, so you won't end up, you know…"
"Like your pops and I were when we started going out," Logan filled in for him.
"Exactly."
"If you want to tell us to use protection, it's okay, I think we know that by now," Valentine managed to say through his weak voice and high anxiety. "At least I know. My parents had our pastor give me that talk when I was thirteen."
"I use protection every time, it's nothing new."
"I'm sure you both know we're very proud of you for practicing that part of the relationship, but there are many more things I'm sure you don't even think of. For example, do you two communicate?" Julian received a very tired side-eye from Johnny and a nod from Valentine. "I'll ask a more specific question. Do you two talk about your feelings? About how certain things the other person does make you feel?"
"What do you mean…?"
"Before Logan and I started going out, I used to be really jealous about things. He used to have a crush on Kurt Hummel, good god, just remembering that hurts me…"
"Does it hurt because Shadow is literally on your rib cage?" Johnny suggests, watching the cat in question curl up defensively.
"No, she's good. It's another kind of pain, honey. But it… you remember when we told you about Adam? Back when Nat was being stalked?"
Johnny nodded, and Val just stared for a moment. "Stalked…?"
"I'll tell you later."
"Adam was my stalker when we were in high school," Julian explained, feeling Logan's grip on him getting tighter. "He forced me to tell Logan I love him. Neither of us were ready at the time, and I wish Adam no harm. I hope he managed to build a normal, semi sane life from those ashes. But he forced Logan and I to have a conversation neither of us were ready for."
"Okay… Pops, why is this important?"
"Because that's what happens when you don't communicate, honey. We didn't communicate until we were forced to. Please don't do that, okay? Can you promise me you'll talk about your feelings?"
"...Dad, what is he talking about? He's scaring Val."
"You're asking your dad and not me? John, I am deeply—"
"Communication is the key to any relationship," Logan said, cutting Julian in the middle and leaving him to play offended. "Consent is just a form of communication."
"One day, you two would decide that now is the right time to start having sex." Johnny started gagging at that. "When that day comes, we both want you to be ready. And it goes far beyond just knowing how to have safe sex. Having a healthy relationship is all about talking, because if you keep it inside, you heard what'll happen. Now, do you two communicate? Do you talk about your feelings, your fears? How far have you gone physically? This is a judgement-free zone, so don't feel ashamed."
"Just… just first base… Val is… uncomfortable with sex… Pops, why are you like this?"
"Because I love you and want to make sure you're safe. You know, some people might not want to have sex ever in their whole life, and that's okay too. A relationship isn't defined by how many times your dick has been in your partner's ass."
"Jules, that's… maybe overstepping a bit. You're scaring the children."
"So let's go back to the talking part. How many dates have you gone on yet? Where to?"
————
Johnny drove the two of them back to Dalton the following Sunday evening, and Natalie had a sleepover at her friend's place, so Logan figured he could make something nice happen for Julian's return. They didn't exactly get to do much yesterday, but it didn't mean they couldn't do anything now. So he ordered some Italian food, he got a bottle of wine, he picked a movie for the two of them to watch before regrettably falling asleep on the couch…
"Well, hello," Julian called as he came down the stairs, seeing Logan fretting over his phone. "What worries you so?"
"I'm waiting for takeout to get here… Michelle says hi."
"Well, when did you order takeout?" He got up to kiss Logan's cheek, hugging him under his arms.
"Seven twenty-three."
"And what time is it now?"
"Seven fifty."
"So they're not late, you're just anxious."
"I guess…" He put his phone down, instead hugging Julian. "I just… I don't know, I got excited. We get to be alone for the first time in…"
"Yeah… you said Michelle said hi? How's her and John's vacation in the Maldives going? Do they miss us too much yet?"
"I don't think they do. Michelle always misses us."
"True… oh, she'd love Valentine."
"She already does."
Logan nodded, then buried his face in Julian's shoulder. He was gone for too long this time. Or maybe they'd just gotten used to spending more time together without any projects getting in the way.
For Julian, three and a half months in New Zealand were also getting too much, and he always got jealous that he couldn't see Johnny compete or be there for Natalie while she auditioned for her own tv shows. He felt like he was missing too much. Sure, he took a break after the whole… stalking situation happened, but that was years ago. His return to mainstream just made him tired.
Both of them had their qualms about the direction their lives were going, and both of them were cut off by the doorbell, and Logan letting go for one moment so he could get the bags and tip the delivery guy. But soon enough it was both of them on the couch, eating their pasta and drinking wine and trying to decide if The Favorite was really the right movie to watch right now or if they felt like something less serious.
"The boys really remind me of us," Logan said in the middle of it all, making Julian choke a bit.
"Really? I can see how Johnny reminds you of you, but I don't think—"
"When we started going out," he finished his sentence. "We were awkward at best…"
"Your friends wouldn't let me off the hook."
"Hey, okay, that was mostly Dwight, and he's your friend too."
"He still wouldn't let me off the hook!"
"You know he only did it because he worries for us. Both of us. He did the same to me too."
"Okay, sure… do you think I just went full Dwight on them yesterday?"
"You… didn't. Not really. I think you did okay. Maybe a bit TMI on some details, but…" Julian made a scene of hiding his face in a pillow, trying to suppress his embarrassment. "Jules, I love you, but I don't think talking about my personal relationship history with our sixteen-year old son and his boyfriend is such a smart idea. Especially since it was mine. I'm not the average, I'm the exception."
"Was there any other way I should've gone at it?"
"I don't know, but I don't think two of my own students can look me in the face anymore."
"I think we should both be grateful we didn't talk about Derek's history at least."
They shared a look, their faces bright red and struggling to hold back a smile, before bursting into laughter. 
"I worry for Valentine if you would have talked about Derek… Jules, that poor kid is terrified of everything, let's not traumatize him even more. I'm still his teacher."
"I worry more for what Johnמy would've said… or Nat. Oh, imagine if Nat would've heard that… you know she and Emma talk about everything, right? And I mean everything. She would've told her, and then Derek would've known, and then we'd both be dead."
"Let's… let's just be grateful that this talk is over with and that we don't need to advise them on more just yet…"
"More like what? Marriage, having children?"
"I know you're joking but yes, that is a very real possibility for us in the future."
"So let's just… fuck, I can't breathe…"
"Oh, shit! Your inhaler is here, come on…"
"...Logan?" Julian asked after a few moments, his breathing calming down now.
"Yeah?"
"Let's keep the marriage counseling to the future, okay?" He smiled as Logan nodded, leaning over to kiss his cheek again. "I love you."
"Jules, I love you."
"I know. Lucky me."
3 notes · View notes
mimiplaysgames · 5 years
Text
A Good Defense
Pairing: Aqua/Xemnas Rating: T Word Count: 4,996
Summary: She hasn’t been the only person in twelve years to be wasted by darkness and left to pick up the remains alone. It only takes meeting a familiar face on a dangerous stranger for her to realize this.
Read on AO3
Notes: Made for the @khrarepairszine​!! Surprise, surprise, I’m sure some of you have never expected me to venture here. This was actually a cancelled fic but this zine gave me an opportunity to bring life back to it again (which is good, what I cancel always threatens me in my sleep). It was tricky writing through a slow burn in such a short amount of words but I hope it’s enjoyable! Special thanks to @lyssala for beta-reading this and holding my hand every time I was insecure about this piece. Also to my boyfriend - without him, I would have made a fool of myself.
***
Day One ~*~
“You can keep it.”
Her answer starts slow and ends with a hiss, and the enigma sitting on a tall, white throne narrows his eyes - it lasts for a mere moment, a smirk drawing on the edge of his lips and she swears he’s thinking to himself that he has something valuable.
Two can play that game. 
This is their first meeting, two days after she is discovered on the banks of a beach at night, after someone gives her a black robe to wear and leather gloves to cover the red tips of her fingers, after another introduces her to a familiar face stolen by a stranger. 
And he had the audacity to try and give her a new name.
“I am Master Aqua to you,” she says like there’s an expectation to introduce herself as such, and it comes out like an audio recording because after so many years it sounds weird to say. She’s seen herself in the mirror since coming here. She knows how much she’s changed. 
“Master Aqua,” he repeats, slowly, as though he likes to hear himself pronounce the syllables. His smile is foreign. “What is in a name, but a powerful congruence of will and faith?”
It’s enough of an introduction and she decides she can’t stand this guy. It’s wrong, he smiles wrong and for someone who thinks so little of such things, he calls himself Xemnas; not a name that should be worn with a face like his.
Day Thirteen ~*~
He catches her wandering the castle by herself, doing nothing but avoiding everyone else - particularly him. It’s hard enough to look at his face without having ugly reminders. 
“So neglectful of your commands,” he says simply.
True. She’s been traveling on her own, keeping her hood up and dropping clues to other doe-eyed Keyblade wielders on how they can free Ventus from his deep sleep.
Not because she wants them to know who she is and not because she wants to join anyone who has abandoned her. Ventus will have to suffer enough disappointment with how long she’s taken already, there’s no need to prolong it.   
Either way, anything to do with Ventus trumps whatever dumb shit and other shenanigans this Organization tries to throw at her - looking for missing boxes, babysitting princesses, it goes on. Xemnas has even commanded her on a mission to retrieve Ventus from his hiding spot. Her answer: never. 
“You can’t make me care about them,” she says with a click of her tongue, too lazy to shrug with both shoulders. 
“The cost of such defiance is steep.” His voice is deep and it rumbles even when it sneaks, startling and unnerving like a candle being snuffed out. 
It doesn’t take a day to understand what Xemnas is capable of, and immediately she stiffens to prepare an attack, battle tactics and back-up plans coursing through her mind in case he pulls out his sabers against her. She’s still a force to be reckoned with, and he’s an idiot if he’s feeling testy.
Still… It’s not something a face like his would ever say to her. Should ever say. She wants to lunge forward and slap him, lose control and pull the real him out of his body, give him one thousand long lectures about what it was like to wait for him in the darkness, to chase him around worlds, to spend years worrying about him.
“Don’t speak to me that way,” she keeps, her voice as low as it can get before it turns to a whisper.
Xemnas smiles and she almost spits that he should entertain himself rather than bother her. 
Entertaining himself indeed, every smile he gives has a double meaning and she’s only lucky to be able to guess what correctly. Otherwise, his eyes act like nothing but glass, doing their best at mimicking. 
… It’s a wonder how he does it.
His lackeys give her a lot of comments of what it’s supposed to be like. How a Nobody feels, what her responsibilities are, how to connect to her powers, what to believe, what to expect out of Kingdom Hearts and when. Yes, she has yellow eyes just like the rest of them but that means nothing. It’s only because she’s angry.
Angry enough that she stews in between the grinding of her teeth when he lets her words slide off of him like it doesn’t matter. A perfect Nobody in every sense of the word, non-feeling, non-caring, un-attached… he therefore feels no pain and so he is free. Where does he hide the secrets to achieving such a high?
Xemnas draws a hand in the air, conjuring a dark corridor. “Come, Master Aqua.” 
There’s a lot to fear in obeying him, one of which is enduring whatever punishment he’s decided for her. Not that there is a trace of threat in his voice, he’s just mostly amused. Perhaps the worst that would happen is finding out he’s just as bad company as the rest of them. Perhaps not.
She pushes the thought to the back of her mind that she shouldn’t follow a man with no hobbies.
Day Fifteen ~*~
He likes to hear himself talk.
The field trips are a nice distraction but she often finds herself tuning him out when he gets too involved in overblown monologues. She doesn’t spare this kind of time with the other Organization members - she instead follows other Keybearers to make sure they get her messages about Ventus. When he drones on about subjects too big for anyone, she’s afraid to name what she’s looking for in him. 
Maybe if she pays enough attention, she’ll find that she’s walking by herself in Twilight Town, leaving him behind at a booth selling souvenirs.
It’s a strange thing to witness Xemnas show interest in something other than the moon. He usually keeps the other members at a far distance, where talks of what he’s like as a person are no more than rumors, and there is a certain… intimacy in being allowed to see him like this. 
“A camera?” she asks when he picks one up, equipped with a neck strap and zoom lens, listening to the man behind the counter sell the idea that film photography is superior and can truly capture things as they are. 
“As a matter of fact…” Even when he’s teasing, he’s monotone. 
At least it’s a healthier pastime for him than sulking.
With his new toy, Xemnas requests a trip on the city trolley, over the sea and up a hill, until they reach a park and watch the sun bathe the entire city in a warm glow. Despite the sun’s reach, she’s cold, pulling on her sleeves to cover more of her wrists, hugging herself because even in thick leather, she shivers. Still, it’s quite a romantic little town, peaceful and vibrant. Nothing like this has ever existed in the Realm of Darkness.
“Does the view please you?” he asks, aiming the lens toward the horizon.
“I don’t care for the ocean.”
It reminds her of sinking, the water frigid and lonely where it’s too hard to swim up.
Learning how to use the camera is slow for him at first. The man has incredible focus though, and she can see the gears in his mind turning as he fumbles with the settings, twisting the lens, turning the flash on and off. 
That’s the thing with him, that mind never stays quiet even when he is.
“What are you doing all that for? Art?” she snickers - obviously that could never be the reason.
“This world exists in-between… a ghost warped by the conflict of polarity, both standing in the light yet hidden in shadow. It will not continue to endure after the War. But now I have proof of its existence.”
“So you’re keeping a record for science,” she scoffs. “Such a civil servant.”
Her own words eat her up. A servant to the public would be locked in battle with him, doing all that it takes to put a stop to his very existence, and here she is, by his side, watching him study his camera the same way she used to study her books growing up.
It makes her wonder why a man so enraptured by the clicks of his machine would be so willing to walk into the fire once the end of the world comes. 
“Why don’t you care about being swallowed by Kingdom Hearts?” she asks, half-expecting a lie as a response. 
The question pulls his attention away. “Only a suffered soul abandons purpose.”
Of course, she should have known than to hope for a straightforward answer. 
Finding a bench to sit on, she listens to him click away, each one blanketed by a pause as he adjusts ever so slightly, moving his frame from the town far below to the clock tower far away. This is familiar, like watching a close friend try his best to understand the secrets of a Keyblade, eyes lost in thought, focus spearheaded onto one thing and one thing only.
“A picture is a moment trapped in ink,” he says. “Here, a piece to take with me.”
“Where to?” 
“Kingdom Hearts,” he says and it makes his breath swell. “To wherever we shall go when the time comes. When all memory erases and we reset, in a space somewhere my existence will linger so long as I have a memory to hold onto.”
It’s not something she really thought about - him wanting to have something to possess. These people, these Nobodies, give their free will up to Xehanort’s influence, to reduce themselves to puppets. It never occurred to her that the others might have something they cherish and want to keep as well, no matter the reason why they chose to walk this path and give themselves up like this.
“It is beautiful, is it not?” he asks.
If he means the ocean, it used to be. 
She cocks an eyebrow. “That’s something that moves you?” 
He takes a seat on the bench in front of her, the camera treasured in his hands. “I am only missing a heart, not a mind. Opinions are privileged to me... What we will leave behind here is graceful, as damning as that is.”
“Hmph.” Listening to him speak about absent hearts, that he’s a hollow body, chokes her each time, like she’s facing punishment for her transgressions. 
Either way, she can’t let him see her get so affected. She flicks dirt off her cloak, leaning back and crossing her legs. 
“Xemnas,” she starts, her tone teasing like a dark thought hasn’t crossed her mind. “Superior of the In-Between, Appreciator of Beauty.”
Titles have a weight to them, some befitting and others suppressing. Xemnas is a man who gives them value, who finds agreement to what she’s saying, testing his new designation in his mind to see how well it suits. 
He studies her first. Brings the camera to his face, aims the lens at her. She sees herself in its reflection, gold eyes bright, before the flash captures her.
Day Thirty-Two ~*~
She flips through several developed photos and it comes as no surprise that she’s not smiling in any of them. She can read the timeline as she looks through portraits of herself standing by riverbanks and strolling through souks, her hair whitening by the week. 
The two of them meet in secret to look over the photographs when they’re certain no one else is in the castle, and a part of her today hopes that one of them is beautiful enough to bring her some comfort.
Ventus is no longer in Castle Oblivion. Her hints and paper trails have worked and he’s now in the custody of the other Keybearers. 
But it leaves her with a sensational loneliness, having no reason to go back and watch him sleep, and she doesn’t have anyone to talk about these feelings with. 
It’s hard to tell if she’s doing a banging job at pretending it doesn’t affect her, since she’s grumpy all the time anyway. 
Xemnas stands close, looking over her shoulder as she goes through a stack where he recorded a trip they took to a world of mountains.
Some of these photos she was aware of. Others not so much, and one in particular shows her staring at her Wayfinder, blue and powerful, while she ignores the backdrop of clouds cowering under the girth of the peaks behind her. He’s captured her standing so close to the edge yet she doesn’t even remember walking so dangerously near.
He scoffs gently. “Continue to be bound by the chains that drag you, and you will plunge into oblivion.”
She doesn’t know what game he’s playing anymore. Is he just fooling himself at this point? What other reason does he have to always follow her around unless there’s something pulling him?
Maybe it’s time to see exactly what he remembers. She’s had so many wonderful years living in the mountains with her boys, exploring the forests and camping overnight...
“We used to fish together,” she says, and the words sting more than she expected.
“Hmmm,” he sighs. “It was a leisure that came easily to me.”
Her heart skips a beat. Xemnas rambles, Xemnas tricks himself, Xemnas keeps others in the dark, the blind leading the blind. 
But this is the truest statement that he’s ever said; she’s never been the best at hunting.
“It was, you were the best at it,” she says, prodding his eyes for more. “There was a river by the closest trail and-” 
He smiles, and she almost hates it. It’s not warm, not comforting, just condescending.
“At an ocean that stretched by my childhood home, on an island, stranded in the middle of nowhere, where I fished with schoolmates,” he says.
That’s incorrect… 
The lump in her throat sinks, and it’s an emotion called devastation. She’s spent years exploring her memories privately because admitting to them would acknowledge their existence, and there’s something about the dark that makes her question whether she’s making them up. Just like he is now.
She wants to throw his photos at his face, demand that he remembers her, shake him until he gives her an expression in his eyes that actually means he feels. 
He pulls the photos from her hand, creased from her holding them too tightly. Whatever stupefied look she had on her face prompts him to say this next: “There is a place I want to show you.”
A single white room void of windows, like a capsule. But what’s inside nearly makes her wonder if she’s been transported elsewhere. There’s a white throne marked by chains and it’s uncanny how much it looks like the one Ventus slept in all this time. 
“What’s the meaning of this?” she starts to ask, suddenly terrified that she’s been found out when she spots a mess of color. 
Cracked and abandoned, just like her. Her armor in a scrap heap.
And right by it, Stormfall, dusty like it’s been waiting for as long as she has. 
“It has not been a very…” He hides his hands behind his back. “Loquacious partner.”
She’s speechless at the idea that all this time the other members think he’s been talking to himself… 
And what did he talk about? Why bother to pretend the armor is alive?
It’s enough temptation to try her hand. “Terra?”
If his smile is patronizing, his laugh is worse: breathy, amused, pitiful. 
“What is in a name,” he says, “but a hopeful delusion?”
“Don’t mess with me,” she steps forward, ready to jab a finger at his chest. “I’m not in denial. There’s so much riding with me-”
“No.” He shakes his head, so tall that he has to look down. “You have nothing.”
“I’m not like you,” she hisses. “Any of you, I don’t tell myself lies that I am nothing.”
“You cannot claim that.” The confidence in his speech is astounding. “What you have is a star-shaped trinket. A fossil. That former life of yours is dead.”
She wants to spit back. Really, she does. And yet her mouth feels sewn together, too afraid to let toxic words slip out of her mouth, too tired to have to prove herself otherwise. It’s like she’s been paranoid that punishment has been waiting for its chance to pounce, and it’s finally here. 
He’s so much larger than Terra that he has to bend over to meet her face, and he’s close enough she can smell his cologne, see the details of his irises and finally witness a spark - 
Anger lives behind them, tested, refined, and tamed. Powerful, unlike hers which throws her at whims.
“This room,” he starts, and he pierces her with his eyes, beautiful and messy, “is what I have left. A troublesome reminder that there is something I have forgotten. The chains that keep us bound are attached to an empty void. That is why we are nothing, friend.” 
The title feels like a leash and a collar around her neck, like he’s about to grab her. She braces herself for the possibility, and it churns her stomach.
“What I have earned since are the hollow words of a woman who’s told me there was nothing to darkness but hate and rage,” he continues, barely giving her the space to breathe for herself. “So I came here, to ask her time and time again if she still believes I will continue to go astray.” 
If there is a memory she ever wished for Terra’s heart to hold onto, it wouldn’t have been those words. 
“The fates that have been chiseled for us,” he continues, “were deviant… unnatural… manipulated. We should not have existed, maimed and exploited. Darkness has ravaged us, as much as it has left you destitute.”
What echoes in the silence is the shuddering of her breath, driving her to near-tears when she thought that she wasn’t capable of crying anymore. “I didn’t deserve what happened to me.” She doesn’t know why she needs to say that or what kind of comfort she will get out of it.
His eyes search her face and there’s that feeling in the back of her mind that he’s going to touch her. “I did not think so, either.”
With that, he straightens up, turning over his shoulder to leave her shivering in this cold room. 
She lunges forward to grab his wrist - a knee-jerk reaction really. Who can blame her when she’s looking for… someone to tell her it’s not her fault. When he turns to look back at her and she realizes the smile she wants is just a fantasy, she’s reminded:
Xemnas. She has to remember that he is Xemnas and not who she wants him to be. 
So she lets him go, to be left in an air-tight container with no Terra to hold her, no Ventus to wake up, and a Keyblade.
It belongs to a Master, to Aqua. And she is Aqua but she is not. 
She has been tethered and conditioned since, a dull glory with memories that don’t serve her anymore except to leave her feeling… well, destitute. An Anti-Aqua, a new her with the same name she was born with.
Certainly it feels strange to hold Stormfall again after all these years, and she takes it with her. After all, stealing a Keyblade isn’t that terrible of a crime.
Day Seventy-Nine ~*~
There isn’t so much of a point to being part of an Organization when she’s lonely even around other people. It’s daunting, and if she isn’t around Nobodies that can speak, she’s around monstrosities that can’t. 
The World That Never Was is hollow, and the sea of empty hotels and apartments is all just for show, like it’s good enough to pretend to have friends. 
But maybe that is definitely the point: keep attachments at bay to make it easier to move on to the other side when the time comes.
Footsteps softly rise as she hears him climb the steps that lead to the lounge where she waits, and it makes her smirk. He walks with the lightness of air; that’s impressive for his size.
“I come bearing gifts,” he announces when he arrives to take the couch across from her, crossing his legs as he makes himself comfortable. In his hand is a white envelope, full enough to have photos she hasn’t seen yet. 
Her face goes cold when she looks through them - it’s like he’s throwing more games at her that she’s too tired to play, like he keeps testing her to see when she finally breaks. If he hasn’t figured her out yet, he certainly has now. 
Ventus, in all of them. Wandering streets by himself with the curiosity of a toddler. Laughing with Sora. Sparring with Riku. 
She inhales sharply. “What do you want with him?”
“Nothing,” he says like it’s his favorite word. “I do not wish to harm him.”
“Stalking and endangering him makes you look bad.”
All Xemnas does is flash her a smug grin, his fingers on his chest like he’s proud of himself. “It appears I am not the heartless one between the two of us, throwing such a blatant accusation against me.”
Being playful doesn’t suit him well but at least she’s fond of it. He lets go of a long breath, the smirk melting away into a faraway longing as he stares at his own hand, those gears of his turning. 
It gives her the impression that her reaction stung him, and she wonders if anyone has ever asked him if his feelings have been hurt. If he’s even capable of being offended that way. 
Rubbing his gloved fingers against his palm, Xemnas shakes his head. “There was a… an oath made to me long ago, and still I cannot recall the exact words.”
Aqua doesn’t know what to say - Terra and Ventus were like brothers, and sometimes would share secrets and promises without her knowing, so she really can’t help him remember. 
She wishes, though, that he’s easier to read. It’s hard to tell if he’s being entirely sincere or if he’s pulling fanciful words to suit her - if he has other reasons not to attack Ventus. Come to think of it, he only asked her to find Ventus for him once… though it’s unsafe to assume too much. Believing that he feels a bond is still a risk, but so long as she can take care of herself, it’s probably a good idea to humor him.
It’s for the best since Ven isn’t something Xemnas should think he can keep.
“How long I have searched for the chamber that kept him locked away for more than a decade,” he continues. “I admit all I yearned for were answers to questions no book can satiate. Now... he simply waltzes out of the castle with nary a helping hand.”
It’s the way he says it that tells her he knows. 
She shrugs. “Magically.”
“Magically.” At least he’s amused. “The portraits are yours to keep.”
She takes another glance, petting her thumb on the smooth surface where his cheek was captured. “How is he?”
“He is healthy.” He leans back, one elbow on the armrest. “Rambunctious and eager to fight.” 
“Did he see you?”
“No.” He takes one hard look at her. “Will you not meet with him?”
“No.”
He attempts to ask why but she cuts him off. “He’d be very upset if-” Takes a moment. Regain composure. There’s nothing left to cry over, he’s happy and he deserves it. “If he saw either of us this way.”
She adds, “my body is changing.”
The confession is like pulling a stopper, letting the water gush down the drain like a hurricane, where tears do not come out of her eyes but out of the growling in her throat and the fists she makes as she slips off her gloves to show him the red fingertips, the purple wrists, the smoke that poofs out like she’s sweating it.
Nothing could have prepared her for how much his smile falls, completely enraptured with what he sees, like she’s a foreign specimen in need of study.
“To feel so intensely,” he says mostly to himself, leaning over the table in between them to look at it more closely. “That it alters the host.” He frees a hand from his glove, and his skin looks smooth like a human’s - for someone who considers himself a monster, she’s the only one who looks like one.
He reaches over, as if asking for her hand. It has to be the most human thing to be curious. 
Meeting him halfway, they press their palms against each other, the rolls that make up the hand and fingers shifting as they fill the gaps. His are so familiarly big, so amazingly warm, and she’s been certain this entire time that she’d never feel hands like these again. It’s pleasant to find some solace from the frigidity of her scales.
Splaying his fingers to meet hers, he plays: first leaning into hers to see how far they can bend, then threading them together one by one, like he understands what it is to hold a hand but has never learned what it’s supposed to feel like.
Intertwined like this, he’s now leashed to her, bound by a chain he can’t break either.
Day Eighty ~*~
It’s hard to count the hours when there’s no sun. It could be late or early, whatever, but either way sleep has decided not to say good night no matter how many times she’ll toss and turn. 
Suppose the only question keeping her awake is whether any of this matters. When that heart-shaped moon finally opens and she disintegrates, suppose she’ll become the inky sky that allows the stars to shine in the new world, a ghost so far away and expansive that she’ll stretch forever and witness everything. 
Or instead, she’ll turn into a star, a memory of the way things were and she’ll shine brightly to give others hope. Maybe even become the sun and be the source of all life. 
She takes her hand, lets her cold, scaly fingers brush her chest first before finding her heartbeat, quiet and calm with the hours in rest. 
Still, what is the point if she’s at it alone? Will she blend into other people? Will she reconnect with Terra and Ven? Will she forget about them, about her current life, about pain and loss?
After all, the only way to remove the loss is to wipe away the reminiscence. 
With this in mind, she leaves her bed and this empty room. 
Whatever she becomes, the least she can have is something to hold onto. She should be allowed to keep the things she’s loved. Maybe nothing will happen - maybe they can run away, abandon crazy prospects and make a life out of what’s left. 
Finding herself standing in front of Xemnas’ door, she knocks, somewhere between soft and demanding. When he opens the door, he’s finishing the zipper up his cloak, having just stood from his desk where his camera splays open. 
“Don’t say anything,” Aqua says. There’s been enough thinking, enough existential crises tainted by the question of why’s and when’s and what’s. 
They’re wasting time and she doesn’t want to be alone when her bones turn to dust. 
Xemnas still has his glove-less fingers on his zipper when he steps aside and lets her walk through the threshold into his room, respecting her request to keep silent, a small smirk pulling on his face.
Aqua closes the gap between them, her head leaning against his chest, nuzzling on the leather he wears. He likes to talk big about being nothing, but there it is, his heartbeat, quiet and calm like it doesn’t want to be discovered.
What’s in a name indeed, a man once said to her when his own very name, Xemnas, is a body and a mind. He is someone, and Kingdom Hearts will take him away too. 
Hearing its beat lulls her and finally, finally, she thinks she’ll be able to find sleep for this long night. Gripping his leather into her fists, her breath slows and she rests against him, taking his warmth as a reminder that she’s alive for now. There’s nothing else relevant except the lack of rhythm in their hearts and that camera, a small trinket they can take with them so at least they can share a life that isn’t dead. 
He helps himself to a lock of her hair as he intertwines it into his fingers, his free hand claiming the small of her back, his warm breath on her scalp as he searches for his own meaning of life. 
“It’s magnificent,” he says about whatever it is he’s finding. 
She hums, half in contempt that he’s speaking and half asleep, intoxicated by his cologne as she pulls on his cloak, squeezing her fist tighter like tonight will be the last.
“Xemnas,” she calls but does not follow-up. 
She was about to say that he can continue to take photos of her, to let her take some of him with her, to liven the mood, to keep her warm because this entire castle is cold… to do something or tell her a story of a world where the sun rises from the west. Maybe they can find it together and gather proof of it. 
He’s been wrong all along - there is power to a name and if he wants to deny that, then she’ll have to slap him out of such a problem.
He moves slightly and now his hair covers her face but he grips her tighter. The door to his room closes. He carries her to bed, and she lets herself drown in his mouth as his weight pressures her to sink, down to the depths where they gasp for air together. 
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a-simple-imagine · 5 years
Text
Two Heroes
Requested by me: Y/N has to deal with the loss of two of the most important people in their life. 
Pairing: Natasha x fem!reader. Platonic Tony x fem!reader. Also features Clint, Steve, and Bruce in a platonic manner.
Words: 3866
A/N -  I watched endgame the other day and I don’t think I’ve ever cried so much over a movie. Sorry, this is so long I got a little carried away with it. idk if it’s as sad as I think it is but I hope it’s still enjoyable. 
Trigger Warning - MAJOR ENDGAME SPOILERS. Mentions of death, alcohol, and murder. 
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When Thanos snapped his fingers, half the population simply vanished. But not you. And not her. Nobody knew where they went or how to get the back but life had to go on. You can remember her stumbling through the front door and straight into your arms. Her grip around you so tight you thought you were gonna pass out. You had no idea what was going on. Thinking back on it now, she was probably just grateful that you hadn't turned to dust. You certainly were grateful she was still alive. After the incident Natasha was different. Everyone was. The Avengers became fragmented in their objectives. They were all struggling with their loss and so they went their separate ways. Each living their own lives. Natasha took it upon herself to help try and keep the world in order. You guessed it was her way of trying to make up for the fact they didn't win. You admired her strength greatly. Having the weight of the world on her shoulders alongside the other Avengers couldn't be easy and to experience, such a big loss must have hurt. You never asked her but you always wondered if she blamed herself. After the dust settled and the chaos came to a standstill, time moved weirdly. Slowly. One day felt like a week. A week felt like a month. These past five years had felt like forever but it was forever spent with a woman you loved. There were still times where she was too busy to come home. Days spent off on missions. But you had no issue with that, you knew what you were getting into when you started dating the black widow. You had been lying in bed when she told you they may have found a way to reverse the effects of the snap. Wasn't the first time you heard that. In the first few months, they went through countless possibilities but they eventually gave up. So this sudden new idea didn't seem all that promising and so you never asked for an explanation. At the crack of dawn, you awoke to find your girlfriend rushing around. She promised she'd make it home so you could have an evening together before kissing your forehead and then off she went to play superheroes with her friends.
The water came to a boil, the heat hits you in the face as you added the dry spaghetti. The radio hummed a soft tune in the background as you collected the sauce and meatballs. You weren't the best cook but you wanted to make her dinner and spaghetti and meatballs seemed like a good option. It was easy but tasty so you shouldn't fuck up. You pour the sauce into a pan and add the balls putting it on a low simmer. Taking a sip of red wine that you had been saving but opened regardless. A warm breeze flowed throughout the house. It was nice and peaceful. You may be a pretty bad cook but you still enjoyed the process. It was almost relaxing. And getting to treat your girlfriend to a home cooked meal was a nice touch. Natasha works hard, she deserved it. The buzz of your phone against the countertop broke you from your thoughts. You pick it up with nothing more than a brief glance at the screen
"Hello."
"Hey, Y/N" His familiar voice brought a smile to your lips.
"And what can I do for you, Steve?"
You stir the pasta around the large metal pot, confused by the silence. After a brief moment, you hear him again. "I think it'd be best if we do this face to face, can we come over?"
"Uhh... sure. I'm just making some dinner, should I plan for more guests or will it just be you?"
There is no answer to your question. "Steve?"
"We'll be there soon. See you in a little while, Y/N."
Your brow knits together as the line goes dead. You think nothing of it. Steve is a good guy and you had grown closer over the last couple of years. Everyone else was off doing their own thing. And while you still saw Tony, it became less frequent as time went on. You'd bug him until he let you come over for dinner. Placing your phone off to the side, you continue your previous activities. Adding more pasta to the pot and a pinch more salt to accommodate your guests. You don't live too far from the Avengers facility so it doesn't take long for you to hear a knock against the door. Dropping the strainer with the spaghetti still inside to rest in the sink, you head for the door. Pulling it open with a smile, you're met by four Avengers. Steve, Clint, Bruce/hulk, and Tony. But no Natasha. Only Steve returns your smile but it's small.
"Come in." Stepping aside, you usher the four men into your home. Closing the door behind them and following to the living room.
"I made spaghetti." You announce, rushing to the stove to switch off the burner that was still cooking your meatballs. "I wasn't sure how many of you were coming over but I think I can make it work."
"Y/N, why don't you come sit down for a second, yeah?" Tony's voice was soft but you comply. It had been a while since you last saw him so he must have a good reason for being here. They all must. At most, you expected Steve and Bruce. Clint you hadn't seen in years. He just vanished after the snap. Everyone knew he was alive, Natasha had been tracking him but apart from that he was hardly ever seen. Sitting in the armchair, you lean back and wait for someone to say something. Clint and Steve occupied the couch. Tony stood behind them. While Bruce was hovering by the patio doors. Something was wrong, that much you could tell. As soon as they walked through the door they brought a dark cloud with them.
"What's going on?" You skip the small talk. Why waste anyone's time?
"There's no easy way to say this but..." Steve begins. "But it's about Natasha."
"Okay..."
"She's..." Your Y/E/C eyes flicker between them all. Trying to catch a glimpse of what was to come but none of them were even looking at you. Their heads hung like they had done something wrong while Bruce seemed to be staring out through the patio doors.
"Shes... what, Steve? Don't tell me she's run off on another mission- I swear that girl is always tryna fix the world.
"She's... gone, Y/N."
Gone? You pose the question to yourself. What did that even mean? Had she gone missing? Had she just up and vanished as everyone else did?
"So when is she coming back this time?" You question. There's a part of you that knows that there isn't an answer to your question but you wanted to believe she wouldn't just up and leave you.
"She's not coming back." Steve continues with a heavy sigh. You could tell this was hard for him and he was trying to think about his words carefully.
"She's dead, Y/N." Stark announces loudly. You caught his gaze as he finally had the balls to look at you. A huff of a laugh fell past your lips.
"No she's not." You declare. "I spoke to her this morning. She's fine."
"She's dead." Tony repeats. Harsher this time. But the sinking feeling in your stomach was hard to accept. This whole idea was too hard to accept. So you just didn't. She couldn't be dead, it made no sense.
"No, she not." Your head shakes.
"Y/N-"
"No she's not." You fire back at Tony as tears begin to form. It wasn't true. If this was some kind of sick joke you wanted to know now rather than later. "She's not dead. She can't be dead."
"Y/N- please."
"It's my fault." Clint interrupts the back and forth. All attention falls to him while his attention is on you. There's an unmistakable sense of grief lingering in his glossed over eyes. "I... let go. I should have done more to stop her."
You know Clint or at least you thought you did. You know he would do anything to protect her. They were best friends and had been for a while now. He may blame himself but you couldn't blame him for this. Or any of them really. But that just made you angrier. There was no one to blame. Natasha was resourceful. She always came back; no matter the fight. And she promised to come back tonight, she never broke her promises. So how could she just be... gone? Tears were yet to actually fall. But you pushed yourself up onto your feet. It didn't happen if you don't accept it. The boys couldn't be right. They just couldn't.
"Drinks anyone?" You ask although you expect no answer as you head for the bottle of wine left in the kitchen. You pour yourself some more before taking a long sip and returning to the meal you had been preparing. You couldn't look at them anymore, they just reminded you of her. All eyes were on you and they were burning. Collecting some plates you placed them along the kitchen countertop one by one.
"What are you doing?" Tony wonders as he approaches you cautiously.
Looking for a distraction. "Finishing dinner." You respond, picking up small amounts of pasta on your large spoon and dishing it out as evenly as possible. "We were supposed to... spend the evening together. I want it- I want it to be ready. Are you all staying for dinner?"
"Natasha isn't coming back."
"I want it to be ready." You repeat firmly. Grip tightening around the spoon.
"Ready for what? Natasha is dead. What part aren't you getting?" Tony had always been direct with you but right now it felt like too much. He was pissing you off.
"All Of it!" You snap, dropping the spoon back into the dish. The sound of it hitting the edge echoed throughout the eerily silent house. He was right behind you. The only one who risked getting closer. You turned sharply to him and just let your feelings out. "I don't understand how she can be dead. She can't be. She just can't, okay? We talked this morning and she promised me she'd make it back. Do you know the last time we actually got to spend some time together? Because I don't. She was always off trying to help everyone else but I never got mad at her because, at the end of the day, it's what she wanted to do. She always came back to me though and I was grateful." The tears finally began spilling down your cheeks as you tried to express yourself. "You can't just walk in here and expect me to understand that my girlfriend is dead. I don't accept that. Because if I do... then I have no one left."
Tony seems reluctant to approach but now you need someone so you fall into him. He stumbles a little but quickly composed himself to hold your weight. His toned arms wrap around you, keeping you close against his chest. His musky smell tickles your nose as you proceed to let the hot tears fall. "She's all I have Tony." You mumble against him. "I need- I need her to come back."
"I'm so sorry, Y/N." You appreciated him trying but you found no comfort in his words. You didn't want an apology, you wanted Natasha. You desperately wanted her to come running through the door and tell you everything will be okay. "It shouldn't... it wasn't supposed to end like this."
"H-how did it happen?" You ask, lip quivering as you turn to the three other men in the room. Still locked tight in Tony's embrace.
"We needed the soul stone but it came with a price. I tried to do it but Nat got the best of me... She sacrificed herself so we could bring everyone back." Clint explains slowly and your hands ball into fists around Tony's shirt. He gives you a gentle squeeze.
"And did it work? Did you bring everyone back."
"We plan to," Steve declares. "But not her."
"Why not her?"
"We can't. It doesn't work like that." You glance up at Tony before pushing out of his iron grip.
"You can bring back half the world but you can't bring back her? You can't bring back this one person." You practically growl in the direction of Mr. Stark. You pause for a moment and take a deep breath "The only person who ever really cared about me."
"We care." Bruce finally speaks up. "About you. About her. And if there was a way to bring her back we would do it but we can't, Y/N."
You eyed each one of them with watery eyes. Struggling to catch your breath as you settle your nerves. "O-okay. Thanks for telling me, I guess."
"Do you want one of us to stay with you?" Bruce asks.
"Or you can come back to the facility? Everyone-"
"No," you interrupt Steve. "It's okay."
"You sure? You could come back with me instead? I'm sure Morgan would love to see you again and Pepper likes having you around. You help her in the kitchen so she stops nagging me- don't tell her I said that though."
"Thanks, Tony but I just... I wanna be alone right now."
"Y/N... I don't think-"
"Please." You whisper softly. "just... leave me alone."
Heading for the door, you hold the door open for the lot of them. Each of them gave you a sympathetic smile as they reluctantly leave you alone. On closing the door the weight of the unbearable silence hung on your shoulders. You scanned the room, settling on the unfinished meal. Checking briefly that everything was switched off, you leave everything and head to your shared room. It seems a lot bigger now. Empty. Tears drop to the floor as you contemplate your future in this very room. You linger in the doorway, almost too scared to enter. But when you finally do, it feels like someone else in control. You sit down at the end of your bed, staring straight ahead. You don't know how long you just sit there waiting for her to come home. For her to wrap her arms around you so tightly because she's scared you'll disappear. Crawling under the duvet, you collapse into the sheets. As if hiding here will somehow make everything just go away. Fingers press into the sheets as you get angrier at yourself. There were so many things you wished you had said to her. So many things you wish you could have done together. You eventually have to surface for air, shuffling upwards so you can bury your face in the pillows. You move to her side of the bed. Maybe it's all in your head but you swear you can still smell her. Picking up your phone, it comes to your attention that you have a voice mail. You don't remember anyone else calling you today but you had been a little distracted even before you found about Natasha. You play it and your heart skips a beat. It was her. Sent just a few moments before the boys showed up. It made your head hurt. But you listened anyway. This was the last time she will ever say something new to you.
Hey, Y/N. I probably should have said this before I left but you just looked so tired, I didn't want to disturb you. I know things have been... difficult between us recently but today after we get everyone back, I promise things will be different. I love you.
You take a deep breath and you play it again.
Hey, Y/N. I probably should have said this before I left but you just looked so tired, I didn't want to disturb you. I know things have been... difficult between us recently but today after we get everyone back, I promise things will be different. I love you.
You play it again. And then again. And again until you're choking on your own tears. Throwing your phone away so you couldn't replay it anymore.
"I love you too." You mumble against the somewhat damp pillow. Just lying there until you eventually drift off into unconsciousness.
They say it gets easier with time. But that's just not true; you're waiting for it to be true. But your heart still hurts. Natasha is constantly on your mind. You think about every little thing you've done and everything you planned to do. The nights she would come home really late. You'd go out into the garden and just watch the stars until the sun came up just so you could be together. Talking about everything and anything. There was the time you drank a little too much and threw up all over her. She never let you live that one down but she also looked after you. Sure you guys fought sometimes but what couple doesn't? And now, you had nothing. You couldn't passive aggressively say you were fine when she disappeared on missions for days at a time. You couldn't just watch her talk and admire her passion. Admire her beauty. Because she was gone.
The plan worked though. They managed to bring everyone back by using the infinity stones. Bruce told you he had actually tried to bring Natasha back when he snapped his fingers but it didn't work. But along with using the stones came a whole lot more trouble. Everything happened so fast. After losing Natasha you now had to deal with the loss of a friend. You stood alone among the crowd, unable to bring yourself to look up. You wore a little black dress, that reached just above your knees. Natasha had loved it. It was a cute dress but nothing special so you never understood why. Now you never would. At this point, you couldn't cry even if you wanted to but it didn't mean you weren't sad. You were just all out of tears. You were tired of crying. Natasha had taken a piece of your heart and then the universe just had to take him too. It felt like you were being punished but you had no idea what for.
After the ceremony, you wondered the grounds until you found a spot far enough away that you hoped you wouldn't be disturbed. You sat down on the earthy floor by the water's edge just thinking about the two of them. It wasn't long before someone sat down beside you but you didn't care enough to look. If you did, you may just break down.
"Are you okay?"
You instantly recognise Clint's voice and you shake your head slowly. What a stupid question. Of course, you weren't okay.
"I have... no one left." You tell him quietly. You had said that when they first told you about Natasha but it had been a lie then. Natasha had been a big part of your life but so had Tony. When you first started seeing Nat, Tony had been the most interesting thing about her job. Who didn't admire the iron man? He treated you like a kid and it would annoy the hell out of you but you know he never had malicious intent. You always just assumed it was a way of showing you he cared as if you were one of his own. He was like a father figure in your life. You knew when it counted he'd always be there for you. Even after the snap, when he came back from space and he ran off with Pepper to start a family. You knew that you could always count on him. You used to visit them sometimes; they'd have you and Natasha over for dinner. He never let you play with his stuff like you wanted to so you would sneak into the garage with Morgan - who was told she wasn't allowed in the garage. She liked to try on the helmets. While you were a big fan of the gloves. You were the perfect partners in crime. Sometimes he'd tell you about his work, you never understood it but it was just interesting listening to him talk. He was eccentric but brilliant. And now he was gone too.
"They're really gone aren't they?"
Clint nods a little, reaching over to take your hand. You don't fight it. "Yeah,"
"I miss them... a lot."
He gives your hand a little reassuring squeeze. "I do too. But they sacrificed themselves so we could save everyone else."
"I know that," You nod, glancing in his direction. "but it's not fair, Clint. Why does everyone else get to just go on with their lives when the two most important people in mine have been ripped away."
"I know it's hard to understand, Y/N. Nat was my best friend and Tony meant a lot to us all but it's thanks to them that we came out on top."
it didn't feel like you had won. Winning wasn't supposed to feel this painful. It wasn't supposed to leave you feeling empty. The Avengers keep reminding you they won but at what cost? As selfish as it sounds, there was a part of you that wished you could go back. Back to when half the world was gone but your girlfriend was still here. Your friend was still here. Natasha didn't even get to witness the victory.
"I wish she could have known that she didn't die for nothing."
"I think she does," You give him a tiny smile. If there was anyone who could relate to how you were feeling right now it was Clint. They had a history. A strong bond if you will. You lay your head on his shoulder as he puts his arm around you.
"Does it ever go away?" You ask.
"No. But it does get easier to deal with." You weren't sure that was true because right now it felt like someone was continuously trying to rip your heart out. Only time would tell but you couldn't be sure how well you'd handle the passage of time.
"Is that why you went on a murderous rampage after Thanos?"
"I'm probably not the best example here." Clint chuckles a little. "but she helped pull me out of it. And if you let us, we can help you get through it. Everyone here lost them too."
Clint was right. You weren't alone in your grief and if you just let them in maybe it'd be easier. You were always going to miss them but surely it can't always feel this bad. "It just hurts a lot right now. I want them back."
"I know, Y/N. Trust me, I know."
Neither of you says anything after that. You just sit there looking out over the still water. Mourning the loss of two heroes. Two Avengers. Who once again saved the world.
125 notes · View notes
nadziejastar · 5 years
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It's funny that Organization Rehash was somehow more treacherous than the first one when part of the idea behind Xehanort putting his heart into all of them was to get around that problem
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I know! The way the Seekers of Darkness were handled pissed me off so much! Most of them were ruined. The whole point of Xemnas completing Kingdom Hearts was to put Xehanort’s heart and mind into all the original members so that they had no free will. They would literally become another Xehanort. Being a Nobody was not enough to Nort someone. KH3 got around this in the most lazy way possible by saying that they all just joined the True Organization by choice. How lucky for Xehanort, right? This is a relevant post I’ve done about this subject. I’m actually surprised I haven’t seen more people complaining about this egregious plot hole. I brought it up before on a different forum and some fans would just make the dumbest excuses, I swear. “Saïx only had a small piece of Xehanort’s heart in him!” (LOL.)
Ok, so what difference did it even make then? Why did it even matter that he, along with Xigbar, had yellow eyes and pointy ears all along? Weren’t they supposed to be different from the other members? Also, what’s the point of vessels being “raw material” for the X-Blade? Why was Xehanort conducting mind control experiments? Why go to such lengths to show Axel grieving about how much his best friend had changed, if Xehanort’s heart had literally no significant influence on him? God, even Xemnas was treated more respectfully than Saïx was because of this. I actually liked his dialogue at the end about how being human must take incredible strength. It was one of the most memorable lines in the game for me.
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How did Xion ever become a Seeker of Darkness? Her switching sides was laughably easy. Roxas and Xion’s dialogue was just so atrocious. I was embarrassed while watching all the scenes with them. Also, if Saïx was supposed to be the one who brought back Roxas and Xion, why are we supposed to take pleasure in his boss fight again? It was treated like Roxas and Xion were getting revenge and it was supposed to be enjoyable to clobber him. Then Roxas and Xion felt pity for him afterwards. And Roxas even acknowledged that he knew Saïx helped to bring him back before their fight. How did he even know that? Well, because his dialogue was written so that the audience could know. Since all of this was shoehorned in at the last minute, Saïx’s redemption happened off-screen. So Roxas had to fill us in on why he was there. It was all so forced, just like the Subject X info dump. 
The game totally wanted to have its cake and eat it, too. They wanted Saïx to betray Xehanort so he could be Lea’s innocent ice cream-loving childhood friend in the epilogue (which was his intended role in the ending all along). But they still wanted to treat him like a villain for Roxas and Xion to clobber. The problem is that both of those things clash very badly. They’re not compatible with each other in the slightest. You can’t do both. His redemption didn’t feel convincing at all because of this. And his scene at the clock tower just made it seem like he had no excuse for his actions from the previous games. Why the hell is he all friendly NOW when he was previously trying to kill Axel? 
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I did see a lot of complaints about how all the villains got “redeemed” at the end. They spent the whole game being evil, then they act all nice to Sora after they’re beaten? Why? Well, it was extremely obvious to me that they were supposed to be possessed.
Their actions would have made perfect sense if Xehanort had simply been controlling them the whole time. Then of course they’d be grateful to Sora for releasing them. A big pillar of darkness gets expelled from them after they’re defeated, then they act totally different. Gee, I wonder why? Larxene actually acted confused after she was beaten. She did NOT act like she was in control of herself prior to this.
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Furthermore, once she became aware of herself, she was horrified. She looked like she felt violated. Like she had something done to her without her knowledge or consent. I don’t think for a second that Larxene signed up to be a Seeker of Darkness.
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I also found it interesting that she spoke as if she weren’t already that geezer’s heart tank. Once Xehanort’s heart is implanted, it’s supposed to gradually take over the person’s heart. Maybe Sora just needed to defeat members like Larxene, Marluxia, and Luxord. They’d go back to normal afterwards because they were not Norted for that long. They had yellow eyes, but their ears weren’t even pointy.
I also think they became vessels by being turned into Nobodies again, so it made sense that they faded away after their battle. They’d be recompleted. But Terra and Isa were supposed to be different. They needed to have the power of waking used on them because their hearts were lost like a decade ago. And neither of them were Norted as Nobodies, either. Saïx shouldn’t have faded away after his battle.
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Marluxia also did not act like he was aware of himself beforehand.
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He also said his heart was remembering how to feel. I’m sure he was supposed to have a different backstory than what he has now to explain this.
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He was all grateful to Sora after being defeated. This makes absolutely NO sense whatsoever unless he was being totally controlled.
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Luxord and Sora were acting like old pals after their battle. Luxord never seemed like a bad guy, anyways. He gave Sora a wild card and then said he’d like to play a game with him. I think Marluxia, Larxene, and Luxord were done a tremendous disservice by making it so that they were self-aware for the whole game. But Isa by far came out the worst because of this. He was utterly decimated beyond repair. His whole character revolved around being possessed. That was THE most important thing about him. It was the ONLY thing that could excuse his actions and allow Lea and Isa to go back to being inseparable right after the final battle. Since he was possessed, they didn’t hold back making him as nasty as possible. Now it’s biting them in the ass.
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Braig joined Xehanort to wield a Keyblade. And he actually doesn’t fade away after his defeat like the others. I don’t think that was a coincidence. It’s probably because he became Norted as a human. He wasn’t a Nobody during his boss battle. 
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I’m also 100% sure it wasn’t a coincidence that he just happened to “pretend” to commit suicide after his defeat. That was no doubt the original end planned for Braig ever since Days and BBS. He was always haunted by the things he did. I think he was especially haunted by what he did to Isa, which was why he always had such a bone to pick with Saïx. If he was a Nobody, then his suicide wouldn’t have even mattered because he’d just be recompleted afterwards, anyways. Sora and Riku’s reaction only made sense if he was fully human when he fell off that ledge.
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I will never ever forgive KH3 for its treatment of Isa (and Lea, since Isa was a HUGE part of his character). I’m still heartbroken and angry over it. Isa was treated like a plot device—he only mattered because he brought Lea’s REAL best friends Roxas and Xion back. He wasn’t treated like he mattered as an individual character. He didn’t get a real backstory that showed his pain, how he became Norted or his close relationship with Lea. All this did was make me hate Roxas and Xion in KH3, even though I really liked them in 358/2 Days. It was just so unfair that they got ALL the spotlight at Isa’s expense.
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It was always, always implied that Axel had a VERY sad backstory. He was NEVER EVER comic relief. Not at all. He was the most serious character. His canon backstory was a joke for how poorly it explains his behavior in Days and KH2. He was actually an apprentice all along? And suddenly the only thing that mattered to him was two kids that the story went out if its way to show never even came CLOSE to understanding him? 
Not his REAL best friend who became an organization member alongside him and who would understand his suffering? It was heavily implied they were both lab rats. I couldn’t believe Lea even blamed Isa for getting Norted. And apparently all Saïx had to do was admit he was jealous and things are instantly patched up between them? God, it was such a slap in the face as a fan. I felt personally insulted by Isa’s “redemption”.
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Now, it was obvious that they tried to limit the amount of physical contact Lea showed Saïx after his defeat. And they also tried to limit the amount of genuine emotion they were allowed to show at all times. This happened on the clock tower, too. Lea wasn’t allowed to cry for his friend. And even when Saïx admitted he was jealous, he HAD to follow it up with something snarky. He wasn’t allowed to bond with Lea in a genuine manner. I noticed all of this right away. It made me laugh to see how stilted their interactions were.
Apparently Saïx was putting on an “act” the whole time because he was afraid to show his true feelings, I guess? They’re just gonna write off all of his past deeds that way, instead of him being ya know…Norted? Wow. And to top it all off, they tried to make Lea and Isa’s whole relationship revolve around some stupid random girl, which pissed me off so freaking much. It definitely came across like KH3 was extremely paranoid that they might seem gay. So they did everything possible to make their relationship lack genuine emotion and intimacy, destroying it in the process. The handling of their subplot went against all the most important themes of the series. It was utterly pathetic.
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And yet Lea was still holding Saïx in his arms. And it was still pretty intimate from a physical perspective. In fact, Lea shows more intimacy with Saïx in this one single scene than Axel had with Roxas in all of their moments put together. Guess that’s why they had to throw in all the other stuff. To “balance out” more tender moments like this. 
The way Lea smiled at him is how I always imagined he would look once he finally rescued Isa. They said “See you” (”Mata na” in Japanese) to each other in a pretty intense and personal way. Especially in the Japanese version. Saïx said it so softly he almost whispered it to Lea. This was obviously something pertaining to their original backstory. 
Roxas said “Mata na” to Axel when he was going back to Sora in KH2FM. This made Axel cry. “Mata na” had a LOOOOT more meaning to Axel than it did to Roxas. You see, Roxas was saying it in a casual way, like most would say it. See you later. It was as simple as that. But I think “Mata na” was Lea and Isa’s way of saying they’d see each other again in the next life. Just more evidence that Axel was really crying because he wanted to see Isa and was remembering their promise. Roxas really couldn’t fill the void of Isa. That was the impression I got from that scene.
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People probably would have been very accepting of Lea having strong feelings for Isa. But I think Square/Disney were terrified people would be grossed out if Axel had those same feelings for Saïx. KH3 just sent very conflicting messages due to this identity crisis. Lea was holding his arms out like he could still feel him there after he faded away. It looked VERY similar to when Xion faded away in Roxas’s arms. This demonstrated that Lea had extremely powerful feelings for Isa. The thing is, this was never properly SHOWN in the story. There was all of this implied intimacy between them, but it wasn’t able to be explored in-depth after BBSV2 got axed. And so, KH3 wasn’t allowed to show them being too close because there wasn’t enough time to properly differentiate Isa from Saïx. 
And this ruined their relationship. We saw almost nothing to understand why Lea would feel so attached to Saïx or why Isa changed so much since they were kids. All we saw was Saïx being evil and a very short scene of them as kids in BBS trying to sneak into the castle. The audience has little reason to care about this relationship or empathize with Lea’s affections for Isa. They didn’t get enough development. There was no way that Saïx was written as Axel’s best friend if THIS was how the resolution was going to be handled. Their story was incomplete. The way it was handled in KH3 was a complete and utter joke. 
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winnipegpatty · 5 years
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baby just say yes | s.m. one shot
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a/n: here’s a cute little one shot, nothing related to the post i made yesterday. just some fun! 
Taylor Swift wasn’t like your idol or anything; she was pretty bad ass though. And you were a sucker for a good concert. So coming to Taylor Swift’s Reputation Tour with your best friend wasn’t exactly a chore for you. Cassy was the true T Swift fan and was, rightfully so, in the middle what she would no doubt call the best night of her life tomorrow morning.
Going to a Taylor Swift concert was never a bad decision, if you catch the drift. She just knew how to perform. She had quite possibly some of the best visuals you’ve ever seen in a live concert, and it was hard not to feel completely engrossed with her and her stage presence. Which is why Cassy hadn’t as much as looked over at you in the 45 minutes that Taylor had been on stage. Her eyes were glued to the singer like her life depended on it. You weren’t much better yourself though. Lights were flashing everywhere, fireworks shot into the sky. And frankly, you felt a little disoriented in the best possible way.
Taylor was singing a shortened version of Style currently, before she finished it out.
“Would you please make some noise for my band!” She screamed, throwing her hands into the air where her band began making their way onto the stage with her.
The tell tale notes of Love Story began playing, and it was suddenly 2008 again. And you were suddenly a middle schooler again, playing on your sidekick phone, listening to your iPod nano.
Despite being eleven years old, this song still had you (and let’s be real, everyone in the stadium) rocking out like you were listening to the greatest hits album of a class rock band. As the chorus of the song came around, it felt like the stadium was literally shaking. Everyone around you was jumping, including yourself. Romeo take me somewhere we can be alone. You and Cassy turned to look at each other, screaming the lyrics at the top of your lungs. I’ll be waiting. All we have to do is run. You’ll be the prince. And I’ll be the princess. It’s a love story, baby just say yes. The energy was unlike anything you’ve ever witness before, and the crowd settled just a bit as the second verse came around.
Taylor was on stage going to town with her band, jamming out just as hard as we were. You could tell, it didn’t matter that the song was so old. She wasn’t tired of it. It were her own words, and she was proud of them.
The second chorus came back through, and the crowd upped the ante. Flashing lights were everywhere, and it felt like you couldn’t even see straight. You screamed the lyrics at the top of your lungs, not caring who heard you. You flipped your hair a bit dramatically just for the hell of it and you were having the time of your life. It wasn’t until half way through the chorus that you noticed the guy next you slowly creeping closer to you, completely unaware of his own surroundings. He was just up and down, pumping his arms in the air with a beer in his hand. He was faced away from you, and you figured it wasn’t a big deal. He was clearly just enjoying the song as much as you were. Romeo save me, they’re trying to tell me how to feel. This love is difficult, but it’s so real. Don’t be afraid we’ll make it out of this mess it’s a —
You felt a elbow jam into your ribcage completely unexpectedly and your breath shot out in a sharp yell.
“Fuck!” You heard the boy say as he swung around to see you.
You let out a breath for completely different reasons. He was beautiful. Like, a greek god sculpture beautiful. He had these perfectly smooth brown curls and rosy cheeks. His eyes were so kind. He grabbed onto your forearm to steady you. He had fucking gigantic hands.
“I’m so sorry!” He shouted at me, leaning in closer to make sure I heard him.
You nodded stupidly for a moment before coming to your senses, “It’s okay, yeah. No problem.”
It felt like a little bit of a problem, considering your rib cage was throbbing, but he didn’t need to know that.
“Jesus, I’m sorry. I should really be more careful!”
You smiled at his second apology, “We’re just all trying to have fun. No harm,” you shrugged it off.
He smiled at your, finally letting go of your arm. “Let me make it up to you. I’ll buy you a drink.” He was still shouting, even though the song had just gone into the quiet bridge, causing Cassy to look over at you in concern.
“It’s really not a problem,” you smiled at him.
“Please,” he asked, quieter this time. His smile was absolutely blinding and you couldn’t find it in yourself to deny him again.
“Well, okay…” You trailed off as he turned away from you.
You expected him to leave to go get a drink. But he only took a few steps away from you, speaking a few words to a tall man in a black shirt. The man nodded before he turned and went in the opposite direction of the stadium’s concessions area. It was weird, but you decided to turn your attention back to Taylor on stage who had just shifted to the song You Belong with Me. You looked at Cassy, who was still staring at you. You just shrugged before you both when back to singing the lyrics along with Taylor.
“Let me see you jump!” Taylor shouted, and again the stadium erupted.
Soon after, the song finished out, screams filling the entire stadium so it was impossible to hear. The lights fell dark, and the stadium full of people quickly went silent. A eerily dark video of Taylor playing remixed clips of old songs began to play in front of you, and you knew something big was about to happen. Next to you Cassy was literally vibrating from excitement. The video ended as Taylor dramatically took her place on a throne, looking like a mother fucking badass queen and she winked, just as the beginning of Look What You Made Me Do came to life.
You felt a hand reach onto your lower back, and you quickly looked over to your friend with spastic elbow, smiling lightly. He handed you a Corona, which you thanked him for before you both returned to looking at Taylor. As the lights came up, and Taylor came through the floor of the stage. The boy dropped his hand from your side, but didn’t make any move to step further away from you.
Deciding to ignore the obvious move to stand closer to you, you simply sipped on the beer and continued to enjoy yourself.
It surprised you every time the boy got hyped up for certain lyrics. Throughout the concert, it was clear that he knew most, if not all, of the lyrics to her songs. He wasn’t drug along to this concert against his will, but was certainly here for his own enjoyment.
“Look at the stage, you’re gonna miss it!” Shawn shouted to one of his friends, right before a giant fucking snack crept in behind Taylor.
“Oh, god, Brian!” He shouted at one point to his friend, “I love when she does this! Watch! Watch! Watch what she’s about to do. God it’s so fucking epic!”
“Listen to the note change, ugh.”
It was odd, he somehow knew what was going to happen before it happened. Like he’d seen it before, but not just once. Like he had to know...more.
About half way into the concert, your curiosity had peaked. He still stood close to you, and you were close enough to touch. You lightly bumped your shoulder against his, and he looked over at you with that blinding smile. He bent down a bit so that he could hear you when you said, “How do you know everything that’s about to happen?”
He looked at you confused for a moment before realization seemed to set in.
“You’ve seen her before, I’m assuming?” You questioned again.
He laughed at that, his head falling back, and hand coming to his chest. “Try over thirty times.”
You eyes blew wide, “What? How is that even possible?”
Shawn laughed again, “I opened for her 1989 tour, hun.”
You stared at him, and then looked back at Taylor. Then you looked over at Cassy, who was completely unaware of these proceedings. Surely she would have recognized a famous person standing next to them, right? She was always up on the latest celeb gossip and stuff. That was her scene, not yours. You turned back to Taylor who was now standing in a beautiful black dress singing a song called Dress. Finally you looked back at him.
“You’re shitting me right?”
His eyes gleamed, “No, I swear to god.”
“Who are you?” You finally asked.
“Shawn Mendes,” he reached out his hand to shake yours. You slowly reached out, in complete shock.
You didn’t know who Shawn Mendes was, if you’re being honest. Not based off pure facial and name recognition, but maybe you’d heard his songs before in passing?
“Nice to meet you,” Shawn said sweetly. “What’s your name?”
You told him your name, still completely lost for words.
“So, you like...sing?”
He just nodded, beaming with pride.
You turned to Cassy, tapping her. She looked at you, and you leaned over to her. “Do you know this guy?” You kind of shouted at her over the music.
Cassy leaned past you to look at Shawn. She smiled and waved before turning back, “Yeah dude, that’s Shawn Mendes.”
You’d never seen Cassy so calm in her entire life. She was feet away from a celebrity and couldn’t care less. It was so out of character for her, but you figured she must have been more interested in seeing Taylor Swift sing than care about some boy singer standing next to you.
You turned back to Shawn, “Guess I’m the only person who had no fucking clue who you are.”
“That’s okay,” Shawn smiled. “I’m nobody special.”
You highly doubted that just based off what little interaction you’d had with him, but you let it slide anyway. Returning your focus to Taylor, you did your best to forget about the utterly gorgeous famous man standing next to you. Shawn, however, seemed to be doing the exact opposite. Instead of saying things to his friends, he now spoke to you randomly. Saying cute comments about something Taylor did on stage to you. His arm was pressed fully against your own, and his heat radiated off of you. People jumped and screamed around you, but the two of you stood still. Connected in some odd way.
“Oh, this is a good song!” You told Shawn as Taylor started singing This is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things.
“Oh yeah, and she totally kills the stage aspect of it too. It’s absolutely epic.”
And he was right. Taylor completely destroy the stage for the last song of the concert. It was the perfect energy to go out on. Shawn, standing next to you, was singing along with Taylor, his head bobbing up and down. You took the moment to just look and admire him. His jawline and rosy cheeks. The cute hoop earring that you’re just noticing in his left ear. He was a site to see, and his voice was heavenly. So you understood why he must have fans.
Shawn eventually turned to you, smiling when he saw you looking at him. You quickly looked back towards the stage, hoping it wasn’t as obvious as it seemed like it was. He bumped your shoulder lightly, chuckling as he did. You looked up at him, and he looked down at you. You could feel the smile across your face, and frankly your cheeks were starting to ache.
“You know, I’m glad I elbowed you earlier,” Shawn laughed.
You laughed with him before responding, “Well it hurt, so I mean...maybe next time just say hi?”
Shawn nodded, “I can do that.”
Taylor finished her show only minutes later, and you started to feel a sinking feeling in her stomach. A tightening in your chest formed, thinking about how this was the end. The end of a concert always sucked, and post concert depression was always sure to follow. In the moments after such a huge high, a rush of excitement and adrenaline, the low point sucked. But you were thinking about a different end. The end of a night spent with the boy standing next to you. Who still had moved, despite people hustling out of the concert quickly trying to get out before the rush of cars. Cassy was crying next to you and you and Shawn stood completely still for a moment, before he finally turned to you.
“It was really nice meeting you, Y/N. I’m really sorry for elbowing you,” He smiled shyly. He paused for a moment, tugging at a few of his curls. “Uh, would you? Could I maybe, give you my number?”
You felt your heartbeat quicken as you smiled at him, “Yeah. I’d really love that.”
tagged: @peacedolantwins2 @fourtristattoos @rosecth @unhealthyobsessionwithmarvel 
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