#‘’well some people have trauma around men’’ some people have trauma around women too. should we keep them out of queer spaces

[trans-androgyne]

“Women and non-binary people” stop. Do you mean people with marginalized genders? Do you mean gender-oppressed people? Then say that. Stop refusing to recognize the very much gendered oppression of other trans people. There’s not some chasm of difference between how our oppressors treat a very masc non-binary person and a more binary trans man. I’m also non-binary and very much oppressed for my gender but because I’m transmasculine I could never feel comfortable in a space that marketed itself like that. Tell me what the real harm is of letting gender-oppressed mascs into spaces discussing gender oppression is. Because the consequence of not doing so is denying them space for their experiences just because of their gender identity. Do better.

#‘’but 🥺 we don’t want men in our spaces 🥺’’ why. these men are oppressed for their gender identity & expression. #‘’well some people have trauma around men’’ some people have trauma around women too. should we keep them out of queer spaces #‘’their appearance might make someone uncomfortable’’ are you also keeping out cis women butches and trans women who aren’t hyper femme #because if so your space has serious problems and you are the one making gender-oppressed people uncomfortable #so many trans women are wary of these spaces because they police perceived masculinity. so how abt stop doing that #transandrophobia #intracommunity issues tag #mine

[hup123hup123slapslap]

So a thought has been kicking around my head for a bit...what if Helio knew exactly what he was signing up for by making Kristen his chosen one?

It has always struck me as odd that when describing Doreen in Helioic heaven, Brennan mentioned her flirting with men and women. It also strikes me as odd that Kristen never got any pushback from Helio about turning her back on him. Even if he was similarly 'out of the picture' like sol was while Arthur was wrecking havoc, Kristen's powers should have faded when she fully committed to not worshipping him. You need to worship a god to get powers, and this is emphasized heavily in the latest episode. Kristen worshipping the vague idea of religion but Definitely Not Helio just doesn't cut it. Sure, taking away a PCs powers wasn't really in the cards in season one, but Brennan works very well and very caringly with what he has to establish as canon.

Kristen was looking for a reason to drop Helio from the get-go. His frat boy appearance and non-answer to a nearly impossible question didn't truly matter at the core of her feelings. She wanted an out from the prison she was trapped in with the Helioic faith, even if she didn't realize it fully. She had tension with her mom and her ideals from the scene one! She wanted to connect with people the church actively shunned. Helio was never the true problem.

Now, gods are shaped by their worshippers. So on some level Helio is shaped by people with shitty ideals. But there's still a foothold of good, especially if there are out and proud gays in heaven. Especially if Kristen Applebees of all people is the chosen one.

When you have worshippers misinterpreting your whole deal, going with Sol's shitty messaging and transferring it onto you and using it for bad things, what can you do as a god? Because you ARE what they say you are. So how can you fight back?

Well. You make your chosen one someone that embodies your true heart. Someone that can actually turn the tides of your worship.

There is an emphasis on tracker reinventing and revitalizing her religion. Changing it for the better. Taking the old and not tossing it out, but making it better.

Isn't that what Kristen struggles with the most? That's what she needs to learn how to do.

Tracker also established that she can worship multiple gods when she helped with Yes?. Kristen doesn't need to settle for one even if she (fingers crossed) brings Kassandra back.

Because the season opened with the slow apocalypse of endless night. Endless daytime would end similarly. There has to be a balance. They are two sides of the same coin. Day and night. The surety of the sun and the doubt of the shadows.

Kristen wants both. And she can fucking have it if she decides to.

Ally once said they appreciate that the enemy is always the church. Organized religion. Kristen is perfect for disorganized religion though. Chill frat boy vibes and anxious doubts and the ultimate message of 'just do your best'.

I think religious trauma is a compelling, close to the heart topic for a lot of people. And some turn away from religion entirely and wash their hands of it. But some people don't. Kristen is a cleric. She can't. She wants a god, she wants answers, and she just can't find them in the established community she was raised in. That doesn't mean the core of her religion was wrong. The church was. So you take the religion and you harness it in a way that means something to you.

Maybe Kristen being desperate enough to invite Helio back into her life is what this has all been leading to.

She can remake a god. She's done it before. Because Kassandra was good at the core. Maybe Helio can be too.

#dimension 20 #kristen applebees #junior year #fantasy high #fantasy high junior year #i come from a religious upbringing and am very much not religious as a result #but dang people from a traumatic religious upbringing that maintain belief in the god but not the toxic teachings are very cool and valid

[nothorses]

Hello there, I found on my tl this post presenting a different view on "baeddelism" from the perspective of a trans woman that claims that she was actually there when the og group existed and explains why the word has become somewhat of a transmisogynistic slur. And I wanted to ask you If you might have any thoughs on this reading of the subject matter?

www.tumblr.com/euniexenoblade/741692501713387520/anyways-baeddel-is-a-slur-against-trans-women

I mean, I think there's merit to the idea that calling people "baeddels" when they don't actually claim to be one themselves is at best counterproductive. The term refers less to A General Ideology, and more to a very specific movement- or, more accurately, two unrelated-but-similar movements that happened in the early/mid 2010's.

There's a term for what folks are usually talking about when they call some random trans woman a "baeddel" when she says she believes trans men oppress trans women: "TIRF", or trans-inclusionary radical feminist. It's a term that was coined by people who call themselves by it, and it's a lot more broad & generally useful here. It doesn't come with ties to a group that dissolved because of sexual assault allegations & rape apologism, and it isn't rooted in an Old English slur, which means it's a lot less charged. It's less likely to get people to shut down or laugh your whole point off because of how clear it is that you aren't listening to or engaging in anything they have to say with good faith.

So yes, I agree, calling random people "baeddels" is not in good taste. Don't do it. "TIRF" exists, it's more accurate, and it's less likely to hurt your argument anyway.

That said.

I take issue with the implication that:

a) Baeddels were tiny and utterly non-influential (therefore all references to them at this point are malicious exaggerations and bogeymen), and

b) Everyone self-describing as a "baeddel" today is actually just reclaiming a slur, exactly like people do with "tranny" and "faggot".

Baeddels (on Tumblr; again, there was a "baeddel" movement on Facebook at the time as well, but it was unrelated and ideologically distinct) were not so small that they had no impact, and to characterize them as widely unpopular- or, worse, influential only in that everyone hated them so much that alt-right bigots immediately revived "baeddel"s original meaning as a slur to in order to victimize all trans women- should immediately ping some alarm bells.

Baeddelism's core ideology centered around the idea that trans women are the most oppressed group, that transmisogyny is the root of all oppression, that trans women are always victimized, never safe, never understood, except around and by exclusively other trans women. This sucks, because there is very real oppression and trauma being preyed on here; trans women are encouraged to be paranoid and distrustful of anyone different from them, and their own experiences with oppression are weaponized against them in order to do so. This should remind you of the recruitment tactics cis radfems use.

That aside, there are some places where baeddelism's influence has been documented: @baeddel-txt is one example. Note that a lot of the posts archived there are recent. Here's one of the original crew, still active and spewing the same shit. Baeddelism has been experiencing something of a renaissance in recent years, too. Here's one of the original (ex-)baeddels talking about it as recently as 2021.

This is not "reclaiming a slur", these people are referring very explicitly to the original ideology & the desire, or observed desire, for that same movement to be brought back in the present day.

Does that make every TIRF-y trans woman a baeddel?

No!

But it is incredibly, and suspiciously disingenuous to deny the harm they caused, the influence they had, and the admiration people still hold for their ideology. And it is downright ahistorical to claim that the term is now, or was at the time that the group was most popular, used genuinely as a slur (sources, I am begging you).

Do not call people "baeddels" unless they're claiming the word for themselves. Do not allow anyone to make you think, even for a moment, that transfeminine people are The Enemy; they do not oppress us, they do not benefit from our oppression, and the vast majority of them are not interested in any kind of lateral violence against us in the first place. They are our allies. Do not forget that they are our allies.

Forgetting that trans people are each other's best allies is what lead to baeddelism in the first place. We need each other. Things can only improve for any of us if we fight for each other. Don't let resentment sabotage you- or hurt our trans siblings.

#baeddels #baeddelism #transunity

[afewfantasies]

🏔️The Retreat 🏔️- Prologue

Prologue | Chapter I | Chapter II | Chapter III | Misc references & details

Summary:  Set after the events of the war Gale and Lorena are recovering from what they thought life would be and their new realities. Gale and Lorena were deeply in love with their respective significant others before the war, they had big dreams and grand plans for their futures together. Only it was not to be. Gale turns into a bit of a recluse and takes to a Lakeside retreat in the mountains away from city life when things with Marge don’t go as planned. After a hard breakup and subsequent divorce from her husband Lorena ends up at Gale’s retreat looking for work and a place to stay. This is an angsty fic that follows the themes of love, loss and recovering from trauma. 

Pairing: Gale Cleven (MOTA Austin Butler) x Lorena (black fem oc)

Warnings:  Race is a factor but there will be no overwhelmingly racist outbursts. It is more so a discovery element and explorations, different worlds, a little forbidden love element.

Tropes: Slow Burn, opposites attract, forbidden love, angst

--------------------------------Prologue----------------------------------

It had happened so fast, the war that had changed everything. The war that broke men, women and children. That forced people so far away from lives of relative peace into lives of rations, scarcity and pain. Lorena had been married then before the call for men had happened. Happily married. Reggie was the reason she drew breath and she the reason he existed.  They’d been a loving couple, they were young beautiful, happy, full of life with the brightest of futures. They were on everybody’s list of dinner party guests. They shared hearty laughs and passionate nights and if anyone could have bet on a couple that would have made it, it would have been them.

Only it wasn’t to be.

Wars change even the best of men, after the first year Lorena’s dedication to writing daily never wained. She held everything inside, pouring her heart over the pages and keeping him informed. In month nine Reggie’s letters became less frequent, she felt the distance in the passages, in the reduced length of each reply and the heat fading from every I love you.

The news reports only confirmed that the boys were enduring a shellacking unlike anything known to men. Meetings with the other wives lessened as time passed as well. Some of their husbands had returned home broken. Missing limbs, too far gone to continue the good fight.  With each influx of broken men it seemed the women around her only broke more and more. Sadness became a close friend and like many of the others Lorena picked up the habit of a cigarette and some whisky to lull her her sleep at night. Her home also became a refuge for those wives whose husbands returned as violent strangers, trained and efficient at killing.

Year two Reggies letters slowed to a few times a month. Still Lorena maintained her frequency as a good wife should. Her proclamations of love more and more sincere as she recalled their fondest times together in her memories and she yearned for him to return safely. His safety was paramount. She was ready for the war to be over, for her love to return and for a fresh start. The two years had withered her, her hands had become warn from the loss of their housekeeper. Her dresses worn in from their repeated use and the lack of funds and seamstresses. It also felt frivolous to spend on dresses without the person she wanted to admire her in them.

Her journals pages filled with her inner thoughts and the feelings too desperate to be shares, her hopes, fears and suspicions. Carmen Kloss’ husband had called her another woman’s name in the throes of passion. When he came back to reality and saw his wife he left their marital bed to cry outside.  After an awful row Carmen discovered that there was another woman, a laundress stationed near him while he was recovering from wounds. There was an affair and a child on the way until she was killed by a bombardment. Now they lived in the same house with a Great Wall of distance between them no better than strangers. Long gone were the two people who cared for each other tremendously.

Heartbreak was all around. Still Lorena put it away and when the ships arrived after victory had returned she was hysterical to have her man return whole and of sound mind. Reggie had held her so tight, he stared all day and night like she was this elusive creature, like she would disappear and he’d wake up to find himself in a dream if he dared looking away. It was good for the first month until a letter came in the post. A perfumed letter. That night he’d come to bed and fell asleep without holding her. He began smoking more, all of a sudden he was full of stress and exhaustion. The ruse was gone the more people came to look for him. It was clear to Lorena that there was a tremendous amount of life that she would never become privy to. Conversation became far and few until the flame was all but extinguished. Somehow the pain of him present but so far way hurt more then his time away at war. Her heart knew it was another woman when he finally seemed to breathe at the arrival of her letters.

“I won’t hold an affair against you if it was what you needed to survive the war and feel comfort” she said finally breaking the silence between them. His head fell with shame immediately confirming her every suspicion.

“Lo” he said.

“You don’t have to explain, I just need you to be here. To want to be here and to love me” she whispered.

“I do want you Lorena” he’d responded voice cracking. 

Therein lied the conflict. His heart was split but not as hers was.

“I love you Lorena, I’ll always love you” he said with commitment. He had, it was true. At least it had been once, she was sure of it. It was in the way he walked, talked and looked at her but now that warmth was reserved for when he was penning replies to his wartime lover’s letters.

His words said one things and his actions another. The other husbands looked at her differently as she entered dinner parties, the wives looked at her with empathy instead of longing jealousy. It was clear and when the younger version of her walked through the doors of the banquet hall and his eyes lit up it was all the heartbreak she would take. She walked seven miles back to the house in her heels and dress. She had asked god to bring him back whole and sane and the lord had answered the prayers. The man she loved with everything in her was alive and well and she could be thankful for that. As much as her heart and feet ached that night she could not hate him or the other woman for being the reason they’d survived the war. All the killing, bloodshed and loss was something she could never imagine. He was still all she needed but the distance was too much and Lorena could no longer stomach it. Stomach knowing what a night of passion was like with her husband who could only now drape an arm around her sparing a few chaste kisses a week. The man who’d been adamant about trying for a child as soon as he returned but couldn’t get the deed done anymore.

It wasn’t lack of kindness of affection, his tone was still loving and his touches gentle, he was still a considerate husband. He was still far better than most but there was an absence of that unmistakable spark that existed between them that had once burned bright. He’d arrived home to her cleaning her bloody feet riddled with concern. Lorena refused all his questions on what happened. He’d cleaned the scars diligently. He was attentive to her every breath. That night he’d held her close concerned for her well being. She spent an hour in the bathroom crying in the shower.

“Reggie, I know you love me but I know you’re in love with her and I cannot in good conscience stay here when you’ve been through enough anguish and deserve to be truly happy.” Her words broke him. The tears that flow were only confirmation she’d never seen him cry, she couldn’t shed a tear or he’d never leave and remained committed to his vows. It would be a tragedy she could never survive. Lorena was strong but she could never be that strong. She refused the house and all of its valuables taking two cases of tattered dresses and garments and a sac of other keepsakes dear to her. In the matter of hours she’d gone from a well kept wife who’d never done a day of labour in her 25 years to a homeless divorcee. 

Her plan was simple, drive as far as the car could take her on her savings, find a place to stay and respectable work. The rest would have to follow. Her parents would only cause scandal and exasperate the situation between her and Reggie. The last thing she wanted was chatter surrounding her failed marriage while her heart was on the mend.

Author's Note: Very different from Feyd's Blade, ik ik, but the hopelessness in the soldiers eyes during the prison camp scenes of masters of the air pulled at my heart strings and so I needed to write about that return to normal. Gale is in the next part.

#austin butler #austin butler imagine #austin butler x black reader #austin butler x reader #black authors #masters of the air #mota #austin butler fanfiction #gale cleven #major gale cleven #austin butler x you

[elderflowergin]

A little rant about MBC My Dearest, purity and men who weaponise it:

(Trigger warning: sexual assault, rape as a war crime)

Fusion sageuk or not, this world has some set rules around purity, even in the relatively loosey-goosey Neuggeunri, where women and men can and do commingle, chat and meet in groups. The last barbarian invasion hangs over them; the old ladies in Gil-chae’s hometown tell the girls that death is better than allowing the barbarians to touch you and that if they do, you should kill yourself for the sake of said purity. Death is preferable to lost purity in this time/place; that’s firmly established from the beginning of the show. (It’s reinforced midway when Injo’s court reports of women who jumped off cliffs into the sea at Ganghwa rather than be taken by barbarians, no doubt perceived not as an avoidance of pain and torture, but a praiseworthy act designed to retain and restore purity).

Gil-chae and Eun-ae have to grapple with this when Eun-ae is attacked by a barbarian. Eun-ae was violated and felt violated by what happened. They know what they are supposed to do, what the old ladies told them to do; and yet Gil-chae holds Eun-ae close and says, nothing happened. We were hurt and our clothes were torn because we rolled down a mountain. Nothing happened to us. She rewrote that story, in the face of everything that said Eun-ae didn’t deserve to live anymore. Consummate survival requires rewriting stories, even the ones that are the hardest to paper over.

Because it appears again in Hanyang, in relative peacetime, when Eun-ae feels she cannot accept Yeon-jun’s proposal, because even if Gil-chae rewrote that story, it’s harder to reconfigure shame when it’s under the skin, when it’s attached to the thing that makes you valuable as a woman. Yeon-jun may never know what it took for his future wife to survive, and that ignorance too, is a privilege. But Eun-ae knows, and perceives her value differently now than before. It’s Gil-chae who persuades her again, who reminds her that they rewrote this story together, two women who survived against all odds.

In this postwar, still somewhat vulnerable time, the possibility is high that there are assault survivors around, just as there are women who may have had to sell their bodies to feed their families, or broken any number of rules around purity for survival. It’s foreseeable that women survivors have been through or seen unimaginable things happen to other women, to their friends and have experienced it themselves. I’m not saying this to undersell the general trauma of war on men - just to say that war crimes hurt women in a very different, very intensely long-lasting way* as compared to theatres of war and fighting.

All of this to say: it didn’t take Jang Hyeon very long to go from “you’re not as pure as you think you are for loving a taken man” a few episodes ago to “you couldn’t live without a man for a day? If you were going to give it away you might as well come to me at least once.” I am truly horrified that he pretty much gets away with it; Gil-chae moves with the punch and gets in a hit of her own, but that’s a bone-chilling thing to tell a woman, any woman. It would be a terrible thing to say to a woman now, let alone in a time when that mattered so much to women, let alone in a time and place where it was forcibly taken from so many women, many of whom died so it wouldn’t be.

This callous attitude continues later when she’s run away with him and they’re in a room for the night. She tentatively asks about marriage, saying that it would be hard for her, since she’s almost a married woman, and people would consider her “used”. (Her fiancé later tells Yeon-jun that he is permitted to kill his partner and the adulterous lover, so this isn’t a gossip without consequence.) In essence, Gil-chae put her life on the line for a man who still says “Husband, no. I am your servant and my body is yours”, a promise that carries little substantive meaning in their world. Marriage isn’t a luxury good that she’s asking for as a whim. It’s what protects Gil-chae and her family from harm; it’s what will allow her sister to find a suitable match later on.)

Jang Hyeon is shown from the start as a man of his own ideas, someone who who doesn’t truck with traditional Joseon morality. He can and does reinvent rules for himself, and clearly doesn’t think that much of notions of purity, but he’s fine using them against Gil-chae.

Yes, Jang Hyeon saved her life during the war, but Jang Hyeon also had the choice of participating or not, the luxury of stepping back if he so chose. Gil-chae had no such luxury, no such choice, an open target on the run. He no doubt understands that the barbarians are raping women, that to survive as a woman is fraught, that sex has become fraught. To use purity to attack a woman he claims to love, to reduce her momentarily the way those old women did - to express his anger by lashing out in this way, in a way calculated to hurt, to violently pierce at the foundation of what it means to be a woman in this time and place is a cruelty that is hard to countenance. It’s telling that his anger at her leads him there, that it escalated with all that time, because he knows that’s what hurts. He knows it’s valuable, knows it hurts when he strikes at it, and yet will do little to protect it for her. I don’t know if there’s any amount of growth that will change this, whether it’s something he can change at all.

There are many upsetting things about this episode, but Gil-chae’s choice to stay at the end is the least upsetting part of it, and the most conceivable, intelligent choice she could have made in the face of a man who - in her perspective - can only offer her fervent words and a feverish gaze, things that will not feed her family or protect her reputation, her business or her heart.

#*there is literature out there on this topic #in case anyone wants to read about rape as a war crime #but i wanted to put that in context #as well as his statements #okay off to daydream about the modern au fixit #mbc my dearest #my dearest #eta: the term should be rape as a weapon of war #although it is also a war crime #as more recent definitions of it go #gin text posts

[cynicalraccoon]

Knockout: Terry, look at this hot mama I found today. 🔥😩 

Soap: Whoa! Is that a Great White?!

Soap: Is that real?!

Gaz: Knockout, you having fun without us?

Ghost: Terry? 

Price: That better just be a really clear video on the internet, Knockout. 

Malia checked her phone for Terry's response, only to wince when she saw that she sent the text to the wrong group chat. 

Knockout: Sorry. Sent that to the wrong number.

She deleated the text and video. Then set it to Terry. A moment later, her lips twitched when she heard her phone buzz one after the other. 

Terry: First, Why are you that close?! 

Terry: Second, she's gorgeous! Much better than the monster spider you showed yesterday. 

Rowen: I question your tastes sometimes, Mal. 

Rowen: But she is pretty when viewed from behind a screen. 

Fey: Isn't that what all men say when watching porn?

Rowen: Women say it too when reading about or watching fictional toxic men. 

Terry: Only when they're sexy.

Fey: Amen to fictional sexy men. 

Alan: What's going on? 

Alan: I saw porn and then a prayer to fictional men.

Fey: We're making a cult.

Rowen: No! Don't include me in your fetishes!

Alan: A normal day, huh? 

Malia chuckled at her chaotic friend group, flopping on the bed in her hotel room. She was on leave for a week. It was a small treat to get away from the stress of the military for a bit. Of course, the stress would never go away until she either died or retired. 

Malia: Just showing them a video of a shark i swam with today.

Alan: Aquatic female fatale over here. 

Alan: Safe? 

Malia: Me or the shark?

Malia: Aren't I always?

Alan: Both. 

Terry: Mom and Dad are flirting again~ 

Rowen: 🤢

Fey: *sigh* young love

Malia: 🖕

Malia: fuck off.

The week went by in what semeed like the blink of an eye, and the day for Malia to return to base arrived; to her diasppointment. At least she had some photos to remember the trip. 

Digging the photos out of her duffel bag, Malia hung them up on the wall to join the already quite sizable collection of photos. 

They varied in subjects; animals, locations she had been deployed in, and even photos of a few locals.

When she was settled, the brunette changed into her uniform. She felt the persona of Knockout settle over her like one of the combat gloves she wore on duty. Well, it was an overstatment to call it a persona. More like a mask. A necessary precaution to seperate herself from caring about her teammates more than what was strictly professional. 

Malia shook her head and left, striding to the mess hall. It should be around breakfast now, so 141 should be there. If not, it didn't matter. 

As usual, the mess hall was loud when she entered. 

"Knockout!" She heard Soap's accented voice to her over the chatter. Looking over, she spied him at the table with Ghost, Price, and Gaz. The Scot was beckoning her over with a mischevious smirk on his face. 

She would admit, they were handsome and their personalities weren't too bad. Ghost's voice was a bonus too. But just because of those two and a half things, that didn't mean she would risk her career to spread her legs. She was neither one of those fanfic girls from the stories Terry had happily read to her nor was she a barrack's bunny. 

She worked hard to gain her reptuation on and off the field and have people take her seriously. And it had payed off. Besides, the chaotic and bloody enviornment that inspired trauma, corruption, power trips, betrayal, and assholish behavior wasn't conductive for anything other than a work relationship.

Malia blinked when Soap called her name again. She gave him a curt nod and got her food before walking over to the four. 

"There's that infamous scowl." Soap said, sitting down. "Was beginning to miss it." Malia echoed his action, shooting him said scowl. 

"You have Ghost." She said simply. 

Soap chuckled. "Not the same. I can't see his." 

Ghost, sitting across from Malia, rolled his eyes. With his face hidden behind the mask, the action spoke clearly of his unamusement. Deep brown eyes-just a few shades darker than hers-slid to the woman. 

"Have fun with your sharks?" He asked gruffly. "Or, your "hot mommas"?" 

Malia almost choked on her eggs when she heard his words. Price raised a brow, one side of his mustach slightly raised, while Gaze and Soap snickered like two children. 

She glared at Ghost, noting the faint amusement flashing through his eyes. Damn him. 

"Never say that again." Malia huffed, setting down her apple juice. Even with his voice, hearing him say "hot mommas" was weird. "And I did. Was relaxing. Moving to other topics now." 

"But I want to hear more about your trip." Soap prodded. "Where did you go?" 

"Who's Terry?" Gaz added, wearing a cheeky expression. "Boyfriend?" 

Nope. "Personal." She replied, a bit of bite in her tone. But they were not deterred. They had seven years to get used to her rough personality. Hell, aside from Price and a few others, they didn't even know her real name.

Soap groaned, almost leaning on Ghost. "Come on, Knockout. We barely know anything about you since you came on the team. At least give us this." 

"I'll tell you mine when Ghost tells his." 

Gaz smirked when the Scot frowned. They all knew Ghost was tightlipped about his personal life and past. It was like trying to pull teeth from a bear. 

Price shook his head with a soft chuckle. "There will be a day where you won't have Ghost to hide behind anymore, Knockout." 

Her scowl turned into a smug smirk, saluting him with her cup. "When Hell freezes over completly, Captain." 

A/N: I haven't played Call Of Duty. I only know bits and pieces of information about the characters. Why I decided to write this? Well, I wanted to test an idea I had to branch out of my comfort zone a bit and see if one of my ocs would fit in cod. I got inspired by the many fanfics on here and other platforms that I've read and liked.

#cod mwii #ghost mw2 #Call Of Duty #John Price #Kyle “Gaz” #Soap #modern warfare 2 #cod mw2 #practice writing #writing #cod mw2 oc

[dootznbootz]

https://www.tumblr.com/matchanne/749059748512612352/aww-they-broke-up-thats-sad?source=share

^the hades 2 dialogue if you want to analyze it for yourslef?

So analyzing this. I do not like how it makes it seem like "he has a hard time saying no to women" which um, Nausica?

One thing I find fascinating is that it's almost like a fucking Hamilton situation with the whole "I still love my wife, I just can't control myself" which yeah bullshit but I know a lot about cheating okay? I've seen it close up for way too much of my life and I know there are people who genuinely feel like this. it's wild as someone who's asexual lol

It also is wild to me that Penelope would hear of her husband's sexual trauma and immediately think betrayal or that he doesn't love her. I've seen a couple people do that and I think it's wildly outta character for Penelope. I think she would have to be the one to constantly be like "Odysseus, you said you were scared... That's not being willing". I think there's a lot of shit going on that shows he has PTSD around sex in general (he was hella excited to be with her again after they reunite lol)

I could see this dialogue as him trying to possibly cover up trauma?? but I doubt that's what Hades 2 is going for. that would make Penelope look bad (that's a crime in and of itself)

Honestly this is just messy. idk I'm mad.

Here's some wips of mine with his trauma shit. It is in no way smut but there are a few innuendos before a fade to black as I plan for Odysseus to often try to cover "bad memories" with good ones. (aka: "Every time I start to panic or the PTSD hits me, I'll just replace all the bad sex memories with good ones." and just clinging to Penelope. This obviously scares her as "holy shit, you were just crying and now you're kissing me.") It's kind of Not Safe for Wormlings but not so much. (I've edited it quite a bit)

“Is that all?” He murmured into her neck. His hands traced across the scales of her collarbone. Gods, he missed this. 

“Only minor things…” She scratched her nails into his hair. She smiled as he hummed. He was still the man she adored despite it all. “You’ll have to ask Telemachus what he knows as I only got a brief summary of what he told me.”

A brief summary that included the nymph, he thought bitterly, thinking about how Penelope brought up Calypso to the beggar. Telling him what their son had told her to try and get him to reveal himself, he most likely would’ve if it weren’t for Athena taking pity on him. Helping him hold his tears and panic until he was outside. He should’ve known Penelope would’ve done this though; His wicked woman knew how to break a person. He kissed her throat and felt it buzz under his lips as she giggled as his beard tickled her.

She brushed her fingers against the course, gray auburn hair on his chin. “Who would’ve known that the beard you always wanted would only come to you after two decades away from me.” 

He groaned. “Pluck it.” 

She giggled again. Music. 

(they stayed in silence. Idk this is the roughest draft)

“I’m so happy they’re well…That there’s no resentment.”

Penelope couldn’t help but scoff, pulling her head back to place some kisses on his forehead. He smiled despite his burning throat. “Of course, there’s no resentment. Menelaus adores her as she does him. He knows she would never willfully stay with those men. The gods were involved in every bit of that wretched war.” 

She paused, stopping her hand movements. “Why? Are you surprised? Is there something I should know about?” 

“No, no, I-” He swallowed. Words escaped him. “I’m just…Happy. Like I said.”

She chuckled. “Odysseus, it’s not like he did anything too incredible for loving her. He did bare minimum, understanding when gods are involved, you have no choice.” 

Odysseus’ breath hitched. Penelope stilled, concerned. “Odysseus-”

I’ve ruined this nest we made. “Nothing.” He squeezed her tighter. 

She thought for a moment. “Odysseus, I know the gods and fate are the only reason you were away from me. That you tried to come home as fast as you could… I don’t blame you.” 

He nodded. He tried to steady his breathing. 

He pushed himself off her, kneeling with his legs in between her own and pulling her to him. He began kissing down the column of her neck. Nuzzling where a grouping of scales was before continuing his path, hands never leaving her body. 

“Odysseus, I-” She jumped as his teeth gently scraped at her rib. “You know it’s supposed to be your turn to tell your stories.”

HEre's one that's supposed to be a later date. Idk. unfinished but you know.wwwwwww...

Point is, I think it's extremely out of character for Penelope to think he didn't "try hard enough" or whatever. She loves him. She knows him. They share a mind for fuck's sake. In mine, she technically is less mortal than he is as she's 75% Naiad in my works.

#Mad wips #idk #ask #anon #Mad rambles #shot by odysseus #my headcanons #odypen

[lovelyladyabsinthewrites]

A Mouse in a Lion’s Den Pt.2

Pairing(s): Rhaegar Targaryen x Lannister!Reader, Jaime Lannister x Cersei Lannister Warnings: childhood trauma, emotional/psychological abuse, large age gap Words: 2370 Summary: A future bride for Rhaegar is chosen. Part 1  Part 3  Part 4  Part 5  Part 6  Part 7  Part 8  Part 9  Part 10  Part 11  Part 12  Part 13  Part 14  Part 15  Part 16  Part 17  Part 18   Book One of Heir of Ash and Fire

The first day of the tourney and Lannisport was so alive. Everyone was bustling in the camp to get ready, even your father who was participating as well. Cersei and her friends had already rushed out of the tent by the time you woke up even though she was supposed to be taking care and keeping an eye on you. Your septa merely shakes her head in disappointment and has the other hand maides help you get ready. You were to look your best that day as you were seen as an extension of your father and therefore the Lannister family. Many of your extended family from Lannisport would be present to watch the spectacle including your Aunt Genna who doted over Cersei and the young girl’s illustrious beauty.

That day though it didn’t matter. You gawked wide eyed around you. All the able bodied men were decked out in their shining armor, some had their helmets on while others held them in their arms. They toted around their steeds they would be using, massive creatures they were that even towered over Jaime who was tall for his age.

“Ah! Jaime! Your sister ran off even though (y/n) was her responsibility.” Your septa has her hands on your shoulder and pushes you toward your older brother. You wondered why she didn’t just watch you. It was her job anyway.

He smiles. “Sounds like Cersei. Come on (y/n). Lets go find our seats. The tourney should be starting soon.”

You had Jaime to yourself again and couldn’t help the joy that flooded you. You kept closely to his side and watched as the stands had become flooded with people. There was so much talking that you couldn’t even hear your own thoughts. Soon enough you met up with your sister and her friends who were out of their seats, gushing about how Rhaegar would win.

Jaime rolled his eyes at them. “And how do you know Rhaegar will win?”

Melara flushes and tells him “Well I’m sure once you come of age you’d win against him no doubt.”

“You forget that he was newly knighted, brother.”Cersei puts her hands on her hips as if challenging her younger twin.

Jeyne nods. “And just look at him. He has the physique of a winner.”

“Your just basing it off of looks. What do you think (y/n)?” He addresses you.

Four pairs of eyes concentrated on you was a situation you didn’t like to be in. You could already feel your face heating up at the attention. “I-I don’t know.” You remember stumbling upon Rhaegar playing with his harp. It was difficult to imagine a man as gentle as him competing in a tourney let alone be a knight. “I guess it’s possible but he is up against older men who have done this for years.”

Proudly grinning at you, Jaime pats your head. “At least one of my sisters is smart.”

Something flashed across Cersei’s face that you didn’t like. Her head snaps back to the field as the crowd started cheering.

The first tournament had begun.

Over the course of the tournament Rhaegar had defeated many of your Lannister family members as well as dozens of your father’s finest knights. But in the end Rhaegar was defeated by Ser Arthur Dayne. Rhaegar didn’t seem too disappointed though. In fact the defeat didn’t phase him at all. The night before the final day of the tourney he brought out his harp and performed for everyone. He even bequeathed a special song just for you.

Rhaegar claimed it was for “The gentle mouse of Casterly Rock.” Using Cersei’s mocking nickname for you in a more kinder tone.

“You are now the envy of all the women who fancy him.” Jaime had warned you. How could they be envious over a child though? You were only nine years old and posed no threat.

Then came the final day. After Rhaegar’s loss everyone was preparing for the great feast that would follow. You decided to rest for a little bit in your tent but couldn’t help overhear Cersei talk to the other two girls.

“That’s what my Aunt Genna says! Our engagement will be announced tonight at the feast. In just a few hours I will be Rhaegar’s fiance, future Queen of Westeros.” She straightens her back and grins. “And just to make sure of it I say we go pay a visit to Maggy the Frog.”

You shot up in your cot. Maggy was a well known witch in Lannisport. Many knew to keep their distance from her.

Her friends were equally skeptical and tried to talk her out of it but once your sister’s mind was made up she was determined to go through with whatever it was.

Cersei’s lilypad eyes scan over to you, obvious that you had been eavesdropping. “And you’ll mind your own business, mouse.” She spat out that name with such distaste. Every maiden had been jealous about Rhaegar’s song for you. Especially Cersei.

You watched them leave the tent although Melara and Jeyne were quite reluctant to do so. A chill ran up your arms. Even if Cersei wasn’t your favorite you hoped she would be okay; you knew that if anything bad befell on her your father would possibly blame you for it. Unable to rest any longer you get up and go look for Jaime. Of course you wouldn’t tattle on Cersei. You would never see the end of it if you did. You couldn’t very well Just sit there anymore though.

“What’re you doing all by yourself?” Jaime asks you once you find him. “Where’s Cersei? Don’t tell me she blew you off again.”

“She went off with her friends into the city.” You murmur shyly looking up at several knights who had been talking to your brother. They look down at you in amusement.

One chuckles and elbows a knight next to him. “There’s Rhaegar’s gentle mouse.”

“Such a small lady she is to have caught the attention of Rhaegar Targaryen!” Another laughs.

You felt yourself squirm to get behind your brother.

“A shy mouse too!”

“Alright, enough teasing my sister.” Jaime steps in like a good big brother should. He hardly ever intervened when it was Cersei doing the teasing. It seemed anyone who wasn’t Cersei wasn’t allowed to taunt you, even if it was good natured teasing.

“Our apologies.” They say half-heartedly.

The one who had addressed you first turns back to Jaime. “Anyway, like we told you, if you want to be a knight it’s better to start your training sooner rather than later. You have a fine build already I’m sure it won’t be too difficult.”

“Yes, I hear Lord Sumner is looking for a squire.”

You never knew Jaime wanted to be a knight. Sure he trained nearly all day every day since he was able to hold a hilt. As the future Lord of Casterly Rock it wasn’t unusual for one to train hard in order to defend himself against enemies, but you wondered if your father would be okay relinquishing his heir for possibly a few years while Jaime squired.

Giving Jaime a few more words of advice they move on.

“You’re gonna be a knight Jaime?”

He pauses, eyes trained on the knight’s backs. “Hopefully. I want to do more than be some boring lord.”

Wanting to show him that you could be as good of a sister as Cersei you grin and tell him “I bet you’ll be the best knight ever!”

Green eyes light up. “Better than Rhaegar?”

“Better than Rhaegar! I bet you’ll be handsomer too!”

Jaime laughs. “Now you’re just boosting my ego.”

“What’s an ego?”

“Something that all Lannisters seem to have except for you. Which is a good thing.”

With Jaime beside you the two of you explored the rest of the grounds as the aura of celebration made the air taste sweetly. Lanterns were being lit as it was announced the feast would begin shortly. Your brother took you to where the upper lords would be in attendance. Tywin and Cersei already there you clam up immediately at the sight of your domineering family members. Of course Cersei was wearing her finest, hair curled in thick ringlets and looking beautiful. If what she said was true then her engagement to Rhaegar would be announced during the feast.

A suspicious eyebrow at the two of her siblings together. “And what were you two up to?”

“We were enjoying the festive atmosphere.” Jaime tells his older sister. “And where were you?”

She shoots you a vicious look, asking through her expression if you had told Jaime. “None of your business. I don’t have to tell you anything.”

He shrugged not particularly caring. He didn’t care when Cersei spoke so rudely to him.

Everyone seated the drinks and food were brought out and being quite famished you immediately dug in. Others talked to catch up with one another. You noticed how fidgety Cersei was becoming, how her eyes darted to and fro in a nervous fervor. You had never seen your overly confident sister act in such a manner.

Then it came. In the middle of the feast the thin king of Westeros stood, commanding everyone’s attention. All eyes instantly go to him, waiting with anticipation what the paranoid ruler had to say.

“Thank you for coming here today to celebrate the birth of my son Viserys.” Aerys starts with. Of course he had to thank everyone. It was customary for him to do so even if he was going mad. “As you all know my eldest, Rhaegar, is at the age to be married off. It’s a difficult task to find a bride that matches a pedigree such like that of the Targaryen. However we have found a match. A Lannister match.”

That seemed to catch a brooding Tywin off guard and made Cersei beam. Why was your father so surprised. He had proposed the match to the king. . . Hadn’t he?

Aerys, a bit hesitant himself glances at Rhaegar who remained quiet. “When she comes of age, (y/n) Lannister will wed my son Rhaegar Targaryen.”

The whole room appeared to stop breathing.

*

Rhaegar had listened in to his father speaking with Tywin Lannister. How he laughed at the lord, claiming that ‘a man does not marry his heir to his servant’s daughter.’ He knew that was more than a slap to the lord of Casterly Rock. Waiting patiently for Tywin to storm out of Aerys’ chambers, Rhaegar slips in. Maybe it wasn’t the right time to propose this, but if Rhaegar played his words carefully then perhaps he could get his father to go along with his plan.

“Can you believe him?” Aerys scoffs when he realizes his son was present. “The nerve of him to even suggest marrying you to his daughter.”

“The Lannister family is incredibly wealthy.” Rhaegar points out. “Even if their blood line isn’t up to par with our’s it would still be beneficial for an even more intimate alliance.”

Aerys grimaces. “That worm wants more than an ‘intimate’ alliance. He wants even more control of the Iron Throne. What better way to do that than plant his daughter close to you.”

In his rapid mental decline Aerys did happen to have a point. That is if Tywin wanted the power. He was already in a position where he was constantly taking care of matters that the king should’ve, even sitting on the throne from time to time when Aerys couldn’t be bothered.

“If you wish to,” Rhaegar started slowly. This was it. “You could further shame Tywin and display your control.”

The prospect of humiliating his right hand man interested Aerys greatly.

“The other daughter. It is known that Tywin cares not for his youngest daughter. She’s meek and quiet, not truly showing any proper Lannister traits. You could use the girl. Her father wouldn’t get closer to the throne if you use (y/n). She cares not for her father either.” He felt terrible saying such things about the sweet girl. It was the only way to get his father to even consider it. Rhaegar felt sympathy for (y/n), a kindred spirit. He couldn’t let her continue to suffer from her own family. There wasn’t much he could do except take her away from them.

“Yes, she is a dull little thing.” He hums in agreement. Long nails poking at his chin. Did Aerys really want to humiliate Tywin that much?

Apparently so.

Rhaegar couldn’t help but smile as everyone at the feast sat there shocked. (y/n) didn’t seem to understand at first until they stared her way.

*

“I can’t believe this!” Cersei screeched and you jolted when you saw her claw like fingers try to grab you.

“Cersei.” Tywin’s voice is cruel as he stares at his children. “Control yourself.”

“But she-”

“I said control yourself.” He snaps, not even bothering to raise his voice.

Cersei looked like she wanted to argue but knew better. Seething in silence she glares vehemently at you.

Tentatively Jaime asks “Is this for real father?”

Tywin sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose. “The king said it himself so it must be so.”

“It’s not fair!” Your older sister hisses. “You told me I was supposed to marry him!”

That made Jaime frown. “You were?”

“I made the proposal to Aerys but he refused it.”

Cersei’s pretty face contorted with angry tears. Complexion turning a humiliated red shade. “This isn’t fair!”

At that, Tywin leans closer to his daughter. “Life isn’t fair. It’s best you learn now if you haven’t already.” Straightening up your father turns to you.. “The king has made his choice. (y/n), do not mess this up for us.”

“Y-Yes father.” You try not to whimper.

What was going on?

Why was this happening to you?

You were not the type of maiden who should be married off to someone like Rhaegar. Why you had gotten the attention of the prince was another question.

There was so much to process for a nine year old.

You arrived in Lannisport a lonely child. You would be leaving as a future queen of Westeros.

#game of thrones #game of thrones fanfiction #game of thrones fanfic #Game of Thrones fandom #got fanfiction #got fanfic #got fandom #got reader insert #reader insert #reader insert fanfiction #asoiaf fandom #asoiaf fanfiction #asoiaf fanfic #asoiaf reader insert

[wishesofeternity]

what do you think of show!alicent vs book!alicent?

book!Alicent, like all the Greens, existed to be a caricature to oppose Team Black more than an actual character in her own right. She was written as the evil scheming stepmother trope, and she was hated accordingly

But I also found her so much fun? She is unapologetically ambitious - she wants her son on the throne, she wants her family in power, and she hides it from no one. good for her.

she's also so spectacularly competent, probably one of the most competent people in the Dance. her image politics was off the charts, her handling of the situation at King's Landing before Aegon II arrived was clearly well done, and her having pre-plans should Viserys die to immediately crown her son and keep Rhaenyra in the dark? I love it. gaslight gatekeep girlboss your way to power, it makes one hell of a story. and she's also beloved by the smallfolk, which is a small but nice detail.

I also find her so tragic? I don't pity her - she knew what she was getting into - but to outlive the war, outlive your children, outlive your generation? developing an aversion to the colour green and repenting your sins before your death? that's self-awareness and genre-awareness, too little and too late. it's absolutely fascinating.

I don't like how she does low-key fall into the "woman goes mad after the loss of her children and has to be locked up" trope, though. especially since it applies to her daughter Helaena as well.

in the show ... oh boy

I was so, so excited when they were recentering the Dance around her, and her and rhaenyra's relationship. I know they were changing her character, but I loved it. they were taking a wicked stepmother caricature and humanizing her, making her sympathetic, probably making her queer. It was fantastic.

But they've also completely removed her agency in favor of victimizing her again and again. I also hate their decision to make her, a child bride and rape survivor - the most disempowered woman we've seen from the main ones - the Enforcer of the Patriarchy, because that reeks of victim blaming (Rhaenys's speech to her in the last episode), overlooks the fact that Alicent's rapist and abuser is Rhaenyra's primary supporter and enabler (they seem to think that Viserys didn't rape her, so what can I even say?) and is just ... a shitty writing choice that honestly doesn't come across in the way they intended it to? They keep TELLING us that alicent has internalized misogyny, but what they SHOW us does not prove it. And again - they've removed her autonomy completely. Like Rhaenyra, she's declawed and defanged and turned completely into a victim, only it's worse with her because they STILL seem to want to portray her as some kind of conversative powerful oppressor who sides with men against women, only ... it doesn't hold up lmao? And they're doing this while blatantly absolving Rhaenyra of any of her wrongdoings and holding her up as this enlightened badass feminist to root for (in contest to poor brainwashed Alicent, who they clearly think they've done a very good job with) (except Rhaenyra and Rhaenys are also subservient to the men around them lmao, all of Rhaenyra's self-made problems are resolved by her doting father and groomer husband, and don't get me started on Rhaenys, so who the hell are they to talk? Most women aren't Targaryens, don't have dragons, and aren't the privileged crown princesses of nations who can do what they want, so they have to make do with the limited options that they have) These writers really don't understand how feudal societies work and aren't interested in actually exploring the lives and trauma and power of women - they're just interested in holding one up as a generic but passive badass to root for, while victimizing and deriding the other. It's a joke.

#hotd #anti hotd #alicent hightower #queue

[vdemon-weeb]

I hate how gender crits poisoned discussion about trans people and sexuality...

You know, I'd like to talk about how differently I feel about attraction to men and women, but I always come back in thoughts about how everything I say could be screenshot and then used for spreading transphobia, part of which also negatively affected my feelings as well.

There's a forced gender normative archetype of behavior between a man and a woman in a romantic relationship, and you're taught to follow it by your family, other real-life examples, TV and fiction. It's so uncomfortable to me on many levels, yet somehow many women around you seem to be fine with it. It's just you who doesn't fit.

But you do like guys. You find them attractive, but you just can't imagine yourself with one in that archetype. But as a guy, and outside of that?.. That's easier and more pleasant, but still not that easy. That's upbringing, some trauma mixed in, and then how gender crits hammered it on top of that with all their "fujo ftm" bullshit. Hot knife into barely healed wound. You like guys, just as a separate thing on their own. You'd be so terrified if one actually tried to approach you.

You'd be terrified with a girl too, however, maybe just to a lesser extent. There you just have very little socialization, no observed or learnt skills how a guy should act, and just no role model at all. And you were also ready to trade your attraction to them, when you were told that "trans men are just bitch lesbians". Just like you were later ready to trade attraction to guys when "fujos are wanting to be yaoi ukes" was pushed down your throat. Just deny yourself everything, because you aren't able to trade your identity and "just be a girl" for allowing yourself to be of any certain sexuality.

And now you're just lonely, with zero real relationship experience at your age, desperately wanting comfort and love of another human. And you realize your potential dating pool gets even smaller, because who'd want to date a tranny? So in a sense, you're still trading your sexuality for your identity.

But now you look at different men and women and realize the irony of all of this. You weren't allowed to be into women, but were pushed into a very wrong image of a relationship with men, and then both were used against you. And in the end the active shaming was for attraction to men, but not to stop being into them (like the lesser shaming for being into women was), but for daring not to want to fit into that archetype.

This is so sick.

#rant #long post #personal #original post

[anxietywriter]

Characters with a Bad Childhood

Is your character meant to be traumatized? Wanna spice it up a little to give their backstory a bit more depth??? Here's a list of things that a character could have if they come from a family that was abusive (emotionally or physically) or maybe they just didn't have parents that were emotionally invested in them and the effects of that when they grow up. Just a few things! If you really wanna go in depth about it then, as always, do your research and fall into a rabbit hole of google searches!

TW: Abuse, Trauma, & Mental Illness

Not knowing basic self-care or things about how to properly take care of their body (specifically for women, maybe they don't know how to exfoliate after shaving/waxing, maybe they don't know how to effectively deal with period cramps. For men, maybe they were never taught how to shave their face or how to deal with their emotions, good or bad)

their life revolves around wanting to do things that should be within their control. Like cooking a new dish they saw on the internet or decorating their room the way they want or how they want to dress/do their hair. It's a constant battle of what they want to do versus what everyone wants of them or expects of them.

See them? They hold so much rejection anxiety. So much. They will never make the first move ever. Whether that's asking a friend for their number or asking to hang out or even texting first, a lot of the time they will wait. Because they'd rather not do anything than face rejection from a person they tried to reach out to.

Learning how to cope with whatever trauma or other mental illness they have from their experiences. And doing it badly or slipping up sometimes but still trying. Whether that is repeating positive affirmations to themselves or listening to music or writing in a journal or fidgeting. They are trying to heal.

They will flinch more than a regular person at any sudden movements near them if they've been physically abused. It's not even something that they necessarily notice that they do until someone points it out.

Struggling to speak up or be assertive. Like not even just when having to order food but just in their normal speech always being kind of quiet. It can definitely be a bit of an issue if they're doing a speech or if they just need to speak to a larger group in general. They just tend to be a quiet person. It's part of why they always seem so calm or timid. They hardly, if ever, raise their voice let alone yell.

They are so starved for touch or attention. They absolutely plaster themselves against someone or are constantly wearing something warm or fuzzy. Anytime they do get attention from another living being, absolutely happy. Little puppy moment, might even start blabbering on about whatever they're doing that day. If that living thing is their pet? Does not matter that the pet can't understand, they're happily chatting about what they're going to do and all of their feelings.

They hate anger. Like not just being angry but also hearing other people being angry. Not just yelling but also the kind of terse mumbling and swears. It makes them instantly uneasy. Uncomfortable. They may not look for an exit necessarily, but they will look away and seem small and try to avoid engaging with that person for the moment.

Alternatively, silence can be uncomfortable for them. Too many memories of a quiet dinner table populated with warning glares and the ugly sound of silverware against plates. Of a quiet house with no one but then in it. So they always have something playing, whether that be music or a video. Something's always playing, just some background noise. To make them feel less alone and also to remind them that they're okay now.

Especially for emotional abuse, questioning if it was ever *really* abuse. Being gaslighted and told "Well, you never got hit" as a way to discount that experience. Doubting themselves because even though people talk about abuse and everything like it's always different. Sometimes it's the "I'm so sorry, I promise to never do it again. I was just angry." or it's the way no one knows what goes on behind closed doors and continually praises the other person for being such a "hard worker" and "good person" and how you should be "grateful." it's not as obvious sometimes as everyone makes it seem.

#tw abuse #tw mentally ill #tw trauma #prompt list #writing prompts #story prompts #pls let me know to tag this more if necessary!! this list contains some heavier content than my usual shtick

[alpaca-clouds]

One of the most annoying myths about history

There is one historical myths that manosphere guys, republican politicians and a certain subset of shippers love to call back on. "It was once totally normal for kids to marry!! And hence it is totally not creepy for adult men to leer after 14 year old girls and to romanticize the relationship between a 13yo and a 31yo character."

Now, obligatory disclaimer: Yeah, you totally can ship whatever you want. But stop attacking people who - at times due to their own fucking trauma - just talk about how one ship creeps them out. Jesus.

But let's get back to the myth. It basically goes like that: In historical times (historical time of one's choosing, really) it was the norm that children or at least girls were married off in their early or at least later teens.

And that is just... wrong.

Mind you, yes, it happened. It definitely was not the norm. Most of the time it happened with children of nobility who were married for political alliances - but often enough did not even see their partners until a long while later (basically only when they were old enough to create off-spring on their own).

This myth tends to be linked to two other myths or rather misunderstandings:

People did not get older than 40 back then (so they had to marry early and start reproducing).

Families just wanted to get rid of their female children because they were useless if they did not reproduce.

To the first, well... This is a very typical misunderstanding. See, the average lifespan was much shorter - but here is the thing: Average. One of the main reasons it was so short on average was, that infants died at a much, much higher rate than they do today. Which was also the reason why people had so many children. Because many of those children would not reach adulthood. And mind you, this stayed true until fairly recently. Even out of my grandparents... My one grandmother was a child among nine siblings. And out of those kids only three reached adulthood.

The second part is very much based on this idea that medieval times especially had this big difference between men and women when it came to work. Which... is just wrong. Now, after the middle ages, yes, we got a lot more differenciation between men and women. But you have to understand that non-noble people in the middle ages could not really affort to... not have everyone in their household work. Men and women both went working the fields. Same went for girls and boys. Which also means hat for the parents there was actually no big difference between girls and boys in terms of usefulness.

Now, for people working in other fields this was less true. Certain jobs were indeed done by mostly men - or in some cases mostly women. And if a family had their entire life set out around one of those jobs, yes, having a girl was... less useful.

Of course, one thing that is true is, that for the most part the idea of a love marriage was something unheard off for most of human history. In fact the idea of romantic love was not wide-spread in the middle ags. But people also knew that... there were practical reasons why girls too young should not be married and should not get pregnant. Because, well, they were more likely to die during birth. And contrary to popular believe... yeah, actually people cared about the mothers' survival. Because, well... infants died at a high rate. But you could fairly easy get new infants. Getting a new girl into a fertile age was much more of a time investment. And yeah, contrary to what Game of Thrones might have told you, there is actually quite a lot of historical evidence on husbands again and again choosing the life of their wives over the life of a child, when there were complications during childbirth.

Now, outside of the historical record in fact showing that we do know that psychologically... a teenager just cannot have a healthy relationship with an adult. Even if the adult has no ill-intent. For the simple reason that the brain of a teenager is not fully developed. Teenagers hate to hear this, but... well, technically speaking they are still children. While an adult has a fully developed brain. And of course there is just that there is a lot of power-difference between someone working a job and a highschool student.

So... yeah. No. There is no good excuse for it. And no, it is also not historical.

#shipping #feminism #manosphere #child marriage #historical #historical context #history #medieval europe #european history

[elainsgarden]

Do you think it's okay for people to hate Elain?

Here's the thing, *cracks knuckles* some people are always going to hate characters. Even the most beloved character will have some haters because that's just human nature. However, I 110% believe that 99.9% of the hate that Elain Archeron gets is unjustified.

We've all seen the screenshots and hate tweets that she receives on the regular, but even just the most random comments about why people hate her are unfair. From something as simple as, "the Inner Circle didn't blame her like they did Nesta" so we're blaming Elain for that and not them? When Elain herself is the one who said "I'm to blame too not just Nesta for not doing more for Feyre."

"She's just boring I hate her."

Now...this one is hard to dispute because if you find a character boring that's on you and I can't argue that. But what I will argue is that I've never had a character that I find boring that I spend so much time talking about or hating. If I find a character boring, I simply forget about them or don't even care to talk/argue about them at all...because they're boring. I do like to discuss characters that are horrible people or ones I love, but never ones I simply find boring. I think many also find her “boring” because she’s not a warrior like many of the SJM females. She likes to do girly things, bake and garden and not engage in battle and training. And that’s OK. Women in the fantasy genre in general are usually treated terribly by fandom and it’s sad to see. And adding to this, SJM has purposely given Elain an arc and story about her playing a part because she thinks that's what's expected of her. Rhys himself addressed this in the Feysand bonus chapter:

"She's mean to my favorite ginger Lucien"

Now THIS one gets me heated. Never should a female character be judged on if she's uncomfortable or wants to be around around a male character. She's been polite when she had to be but she clearly does not want to be around him at this time. Now maybe you can find an argument that, "why doesn't she just tell him no" why should a woman have to? Lucien himself knows Elain doesn't wanna be around him, so fandom should respect that. Elain was thrust into this world of fae customs and beliefs and is still very much mourning her human life. She doesn't want a mate. We also know that Lucien is very much connected to her trauma of being made against her will. Did he know any of that was gonna happen? No, but regardless he's a part of it. I don't vilify Lucien for wanting a mate and mourning that Elain might not want him the way he does, but we can't blame Elain for not being more forward when Lucien himself hasn't confronted the situation either. He has to understand she's mourning her fiancee and is not interested. Let's stop blaming the women in these instances. Sarah is clearly saving this drama for Elain's book. It's all been set up. And btw, she isn't mean. She's been polite, but again she's not comfortable around him and what "mates" are in this world. I remember seeing Mor vilified for not being more open to Azriel or "stringing him along" and that pissed me off too. I will always stand by women. These men are hundreds of years old, they can read signals and tell when a woman isn't into it.

"She didn't fight for Nesta the way Nesta did for her"

Elain quite literally got over her fears of battle and bloodshed and stabbed the king in the neck right before he was about to kill Nesta and Cassian both. If that's not the biggest showing of love from Elain for Nesta then I don't know what is. I think fandom quite often forgets that Elain is still very much traumatized like Nesta as well. Nesta's trauma is manifesting as drinking and sleeping around and lashing out, Elain's is retreating into herself and pretending that everything is fine. Fandom wants to blame Elain for Nesta's inner thoughts and self doubts in ACOSF when Elain DID try but she was pushed away repeatedly by Nesta. Why are we blaming Elain for that? You can only take people yelling at you for so long before you take the hint and stay away.

In conclusion, Elain Archeron is a good person, a good character with so much room for potential, and so much more than shipper bias and hate. I eagerly await her story and journey and the people that hate her are gonna do so regardless, but I’m happy to know that they’re being silly and mostly misogynistic the entire time they’re doing it. 

#elain archeron #pro elain #elriel #acotar #a court of thorns and roses #acosf #a court of silver flames #acowar #a court of wings and ruin #acomaf #a court of mist and fury #nesta archeron #lucien #acofas #a court of frost and starlight #sjm #elain x azriel

[closetednobody]

C'mon, I cannot be the only that after all the shit they put Maya through with the demotion and the way Beckett was harassing Maya at work that thought that bottle of whiskey was well-deserved revenge?

She didn't force Beckett to drink. That was on him. I would've given Sullivan something too! Like, hire a PI, get photos of him and Ross and put all around the internet, the Stations, etc. If you're going down, bring them with you.

Like, why did everybody forgive Sullivan?

Honestly, there a lots of fingers to be pointed about Maya's breakdown.

Hello OP!

Sorry that I replied to this a little late, but no, you're not alone.

Although I wouldn't encourage Maya's actions, I understand why she felt compelled to do so, especially with how she was raised by Lane Bishop.

I also partially disagree with Ben's "you did that because you were in a bad place," and for Maya to "apologize when you feel comfortable" because it wasn't entirely Maya's fault. They saw how Maya was being bullied by Beckett - what did they do for their former captain who was demoted for saving a kid's life? NOTHING.

Of course, one would argue that Maya could learn from Andy's more diplomatic approach or Sullivan's more political (read: cunning) approach. Or maybe , she could've been patient for slightly longer, and things would've unraveled itself. But Maya has been patient - from being ignored by McCallister, bullied by Beckett, and unfairly lectured by Ross. In one of my posts, I've explained what could be Maya's thought process behind the blackmail (and probably why she wouldn't send PI on Sullivan and Ross) and that was the start of her... downward spiral.

So... should Maya give that bottle as revenge? No. If she is as heroic and noble as Andy Herrera, she shouldn't.

But Maya is an anti-hero. The twisted protagonist with a dark side. One who has been treated unfairly and has been "nice" for too long, and without Carina in her corner, she was... wounded. Feral. Desperate.

So, as far as Maya was concerned, Beckett was not an alcoholic when she gifted the bottle to him, as per Ross' wise and fair evaluation. So, a little whiskey to celebrate should be fine. (Maya's smirk when she left the room was sinfully satisfying.)

Should Maya apologize? Objectively, she doesn't have to. Conscientiously? She can. But it's not her fault. I hope we can delve a little more on her self-blame tendency, which is common amongst people who are recovering from traumas.

Sullivan's case? Honestly? Imo, it is just how the system/society treats men and women differently.

If a man fights for his rights for power, he is passionate and driven.

If a woman does the same thing, she is reckless and selfish.

Why? Because by social norm, women would generally become the "healer" while men are demanded to be the "hunter" - fascinatingly, it's something that is almost coded in our brains. But society and gender roles have changed so much that our brain, weirdly, couldn't adapt to it, hence creating biases that we subconsciously practice.

As "healers" (e.g., homemaker, mothers, etc), women are expected to be role models who are patient, forgiving, respectable, loving, optimistic, and the list goes on. Believe it or not, these are some of the traits associated with maternal qualities. Phew.

As "hunters" (e.g., earners, husbands, etc), men are expected to be goal-driven and focused because their main role is, basically, to go out, find supplies, and get their ass home, safely. They are expected to protect their home and dependents - by all means, at all cost.

But centuries have passed, and society has evolved. Even gender roles have shifted now, and the old norm doesn't seem applicable anymore. BUT! Our mind doesn't know that. (Recommending "The Idiot Brain" by Dean Burnett if you are interested in this weird conundrum.)

It's frustrating. But... *shrugs*

I never liked Sullivan after what he did to Maya, and I don't think I ever will.

I think I am rambling... so I'll stop here. 😆😂

#maya bishop #station 19 #answered

[merrilark]

I don't want to sound like I'm hating on something before it's even had a chance to be released, but if the news is true, there's something a little amusing about the LA!A:TLA show supposedly watering down Sokka's arc because his sexism in the OG show "was iffy". A:TLA, the show with one of the most widely loved redemption arcs... The show most people think of when they think "well-written redemption arc"...

Like... are we going to water down Zuko, then, too? Or does he get a pass at being crappy because he's a "villain", while Sokka, a "hero", isn't allowed to be a little dislikable?

I'm too zonked today to put my thoughts together eloquently, sorry, but something about only allowing "bad" characters the room to do bad things and expecting them to grow, while assuming "good" characters must always be good and never make mistakes because duh, they're the GOOD guys seems... really ironic for a show that constantly pushed the thought that there is good and evil in everything, and what might look like acts of heroism to one person may look like acts of villainy to another. Villains will often see themselves as the heroes of their own story because they're doing what they believe is right according to their environment or circumstance. No one is perfect and everyone has the capability to evolve and change for the better (or the worst). Etc. etc.

Obviously Sokka's sexism is nothing compared to the harm Zuko does, but that makes the possible watering down of Sokka's arc worse, in my opinion. It creates this idea that badness is exclusive to identifiably "bad" people and that "good" people will always be right and just, and are above being influenced into bad ideas or beliefs. But that's just not true! Zuko and Sokka are both products of the places they came from, the culture they grew up in, and the trauma they endured. Sokka grew up in a tribe that had at least some heavy focus on traditional gender roles, enough that all the men were expected to go to war and the boys, like Sokka, left to defend the tribe. Being the oldest boy and carrying around the horror of losing his mother and potentially his father to the threat of the conquesting Fire Nation, it's no wonder Sokka carries some sexist notions. He's a young teen who feels he has to shoulder the weight of protecting the entire Southern Water Tribe alone. I'm shocked he's not more sexist, actually, because it's also a matter of pride, duty, and promise for him to protect the women and children around him. It makes just as much sense that he would believe in the rigidity of gender roles as much as Zuko, also a teen, also burdened by the weight his father placed on him, believes that his quest for finding the Avatar is important. Honor is important to both of them, because it's really all either of them has or have known.

But even if Sokka's sexism wasn't rooted in something as dramatic as his mother dying in a Fire Nation attack or all the other men going off to war, getting to see him grow through his experiences with Suki and the Kyoshi Warriors is so satisfying despite how quick it is. It's fun to see characters like Sokka get a little humbled, it's fun to see them change and grow and become more likable, because that's real.

Anyway. That's a lot of words for really just trying to say that I think "good" characters should be allowed flaws just like "bad" characters, because in the end, everyone is a person and what is A:TLA about if not the power of nuture vs. nature, and the ability to choose your own path?

#again too early to say. might be judging too quickly but that made me grimace. #sokka isn't even that bad in the og! i feel like if you watered him down more he'd just not be sexist at all lol #why must heroes be perfect? let them be jerks. let me dislike them. #media criticism #media criticism for ts #media crit for ts #merri grumbles

[youremyheaven]

I’m not Indian but the thing you said about body shaming from parents really hits. I do come from an immigrant background though and I feel like a lot of our cultures have normalised this behaviour.

But even my dad who is not an immigrant (yk those older white men who marry significantly younger women from 2nd/3rd world countries? An elder passport bro if you will lmao), once made a comment in a highly derogatory tone about my ass being too big. It wasn’t really sexual but more so a comment on my weight gain at the time, but bro I was 12 and I still think about it😭

People talk about body positivity a lot but growing up chubby/with curves is deeply traumatic and it makes me sad to think about how many of us experienced this

that was so wrong of your padre 😭😭

i s2g i feel like all non-white parents are more or less like this, and i guess even some white parents. its such a shame bc i remember being 13-14 and i felt hideous like nobody would even want to look at me and my mom would slut shame me and im like ??? babe im ugly and fat,, no part of me is "sexy" or "desirable" ALSO IM 13??? but she would talk like i was seducing every man in the city lmfao

I S2G the trauma of my early teens fcked me up ngl. its so heartbreaking to just transition from girlhood to adolescence and coming to terms with your burgeoning womanhood. like that's such a complicated experience to make peace with??? until yesterday i was a child but now i am still a child but people dont look at me like that, weird men on the streets catcall you, say disgusting things when you're within earshot, your mom thinks you're a whore even tho u literally do not know what exactly sex involves, strangers are sending u dick pics and porn gifs, now u have to worry about other people's intentions bc they might be trying to "take advantage" of you when a few months ago, they saw u as an innocent child. if someone gropes you, you hate yourself, you feel disgusting and dirty and no one tells you its not your fault. you feel afraid of people, of how they look at you, of what they might do to you, you dont want to be seen, you dont want to be touched. if you tell someone you were assaulted, sometimes they tell you its because you were careless or that you were asking for it or worse that you secretly enjoyed it. you cant eat or you eat too much, food becomes a source of shame. you want to feel like you have value, like you have power so you try to "own" your sexuality. fine if everyone thinks im a whore anyway i might as well "own" it except that it literally doesn't help. you feel worse. you dont know who you are because your whole identity revolves around how others perceive u and not what u have to offer as a human being. u think talent is worthless if u arent pretty. i could go on and on

literally female adolescence is a hellscape and every girl should get a medal for surviving it.

im sorry for my long (probably triggering) ramble but i just had to let it out lmao

im sorry that we've had to go thru this. praying for all girls and future women<333