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#<-funny! that’s the exact thing that the show was making fun of us for doing! how funny is that.
leonardalphachurch · 5 months
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people are often like “wow early rvb is so problematic” and like. that’s not wrong but it implies that later rvb somehow got better and like.
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besties this was 2015. the only reason chorus isn’t filled with jokes like this is because chorus doesn’t have any jokes. this show was never our friend.
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moonstruckme · 6 months
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Hey love!
Was wondering if you could write a poly!maurader x fem!reader fic where (boys being boys) they had a bet who could go longer without sex and about a week reader decided to tease them a lil bit where she would flirt or like bend over to pick up smtg.
Thanks for requesting lovely!
cw: mature themes
poly!marauders x fem!reader ♡ 1k words
It’s so boy of them to discount you like this. Like, the bet had been funny at first, each of your boyfriends doing whatever they could to put the others in hot and heavy situations with you and each other, but after you and Sirius had gotten locked in a closet for the better part of an afternoon, they’d decided to take things down a notch. And as far as you’re concerned, that was when the fun part came to an end. 
The thing is, they’re guys. While they’re having their little stint of celibacy, they can at least still get themselves off. Multiple times a day, if they feel like it. It’s not that easy for you. So for you to not even have been involved in the bet, and yet be the one feeling its consequences most acutely…well, it’s beginning to grate on your nerves.
So you decide to make it fun again. 
“Oh, shit.” You say, getting James’ attention from where he’s going through the closet, trying to find a pair of pants to wear. “I dropped my wand under the bed.” 
He moves towards you. “I’ll get it for you, lovie.” 
“No, no, that’s alright.” You say, getting down on your hands and knees. “I’ve got it.” 
James falls silent as you arch your back under the pretense of reaching under the bed, letting your short skirt slip up to show the pretty, barely-there panties you’d picked out this morning. You linger for a bit longer than necessary, letting James take in the view from where he stands across from the bed. 
“Got it.” You emerge with the wand, sitting back on your legs and turning to James with a smile. 
His mouth is slightly open. He blinks, eyes dazed and pupils blown behind his lenses. “That’s, uh…” He blinks a few more times, faster. “That’s great, sweetheart. Glad you found it.” 
♡ ♡ ♡
“Gods.” Sirius nearly chokes when he sees you in the kitchen. “You’re looking nice today, angel.” 
You almost roll your eyes. You’re only wearing a tank top and underwear, but apparently that’s all it takes when your boyfriend’s been so long without any of you. Instead, you plaster on a coy smile.
“Thanks,” you say, as though you hadn’t noticed. “You look nice, too.” 
Sirius is making eyes at you as he leans his elbows on the counter. Like you’re the one who needs to worry. “Whatcha making, sweet thing?”
“Chocolate mousse. I’m just working on melting the chocolate right now.” You dip your forefinger into the warm, gooey liquid, bringing it to your mouth and sucking the chocolate off. You keep your eyes on Sirius’, so you can see the exact moment when his darken. “Mmm, want to try?” 
Sirius swallows. “Huh?”
You don’t bother looking innocuous, letting your eyes go droopy and suggestive in the way you know how. “I said, do you want some?” 
He’s silent for so long you think he might ask you to repeat yourself again, but then he clears his throat and stammers, “Uh, no—no thanks, doll. I’m good.” 
You pout. “It’s really good, though. Here, have a taste.” You cross the few steps between you and kiss him. 
Sirius takes a second to kiss you back, but when he does it’s so wanting that you don’t even have to be sneaky about winding one of your hands into his hair while using the other to bring his to your ass. He squeezes, and you moan into his mouth, grinding your hips into his just slightly. 
Sirius gasps, breaking away. He takes one step back, then another, putting distance between you as he tries to blink the glaze from his eyes. “Minx,” he whispers accusingly, and flees the kitchen. 
♡ ♡ ♡
“Thanks, baby.” You bat your eyelashes up at Remus as he brings you a glass of water from the kitchen. 
He lets out a low chuckle. “I know what you’re doing.” 
“No idea what you’re talking about,” you hum. 
Remus gives you a deadpan look, but there’s a glint of amusement in his amber eyes. “Earlier this morning, I went into our bedroom to find James, pantsless, with a hard-on.” It takes every ounce of control you have not to grin, but Remus quirks a brow like you have anyway. “And then a little while ago, Sirius came running out of the kitchen like something was chasing him, and he could barely speak. You didn’t have anything to do with that, dovey?” 
You let your eyes go wide and innocent as you shake your head. “Maybe they’re just getting sick of your competition.” 
“Mm, unlikely,” Remus hums, and his surety of his own willpower only worsens your determination to make him falter. “But if that’s the story you want to stick with, that’s fine.” 
You frown at him, the glass of water slippery with condensation in your palm. “Well, I—oh, damn!” you tip the glass of water into Remus’ lap, soaking his pants. He freezes, gasping at the cold. “I’m so sorry, honey. Here, let me help.” Luckily for you, you’d (completely coincidentally, of course) left a tea towel nearby earlier. You take it, blotting at Remus’ crotch with touches that start urgent but become lingering as you go on. After a minute, there’s really nothing left to sop up, and Remus hands are laid flat on the couch, every inch of him tense as you dab at his bulge with slow, tantalizing touches. 
When he speaks, his voice is low, gravelly. “You’re a lot more conniving than we give you credit for, you know that?”
You let your lips curl into a smile, leaving your hand to rest on his crotch. “I know.” 
Remus tips his head back, letting his eyes slip closed as he takes a slow, deep breath. “Fuck it.” 
You blink. “Huh?”
In the next second, Remus is gripping your hips and hoisting you up against him, your chest pressed to his. You inhale sharply as he stands, wrapping your legs around his waist, and he’s kissing at your throat, master of multitasking while he carries you into the bedroom. 
He nips at your jaw, and you giggle deliriously. “I won?” you ask, hardly believing it. Of all your boyfriends, you thought Remus had the least chance of breaking down before the others. 
His chuckle reverberates through you, and warmth flares in your core in response. “Sure you did, sweetheart. Though I think by the time we’re done here, who exactly won will be a bit more debatable.”
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evansbby · 10 months
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𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐃𝐞𝐯𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐞𝐝
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𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: bestfriend!Ari Levinson x naive!reader
𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: HEAVY SOMNO, dark!Ari, smutt, daddy!kink, non-con, 18+ only, minors dni.
𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: Your best friend, Ari, wants to fuck you. And he doesn’t care if you’re awake or asleep...
𝐀/𝐍: SUPER DARK. Please, if you don’t like, don’t read! The whole thing is basically somno, and this is a dark fic! Please beware of that. Apart from that, enjoy! Also, this is completely unedited lol please be kind.
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“Ow! Ari! I told you; my boyfriend won’t like it if you do that!”
“What? This?”
Ari plants his lips against the nape of your bare neck, giving the sensitive skin a hearty suck. His fingers dance down your body, digging into your ribs and making you giggle and squirm on top of him.
“Stop! It hurts!”
“Oh yeah? Why are you laughing, then?” He tickles you harder, holding you tightly in his arms lest you try to escape. You’re too busy laughing your head off to notice his lips press against your skin once more, his tongue lathering at the hickey he’s just given you. And then he sucks again, so hard that your laughter is cut short and you gasp, feeling like your sensitive skin is going to break as he continues to suction it.
“Nooo, Ari, please! Steve won’t like that! He’ll get the wrong idea!”
Ari draws back and smirks, “Please. We’ve been best friends longer than you’ve been going out with Steve. And best friends are allowed to cuddle every now and then, I’m sure your tool of a boyfriend will understand that.”
“Hey! Don’t call him a tool!” You smack Ari on the chest but all he does is grab both your wrists with one hand, his other one snaking down to tickle you some more. You scream and laugh, trying to break free but he’s way too strong as he pins you down on the sofa, climbing on top of you and continuing to attack your ribs with his fingers.
Ari had been your best friend for years – ever since high school, to be exact. He was big and protective and strong and confident, making you feel safe whenever you were around him. He was also goofy and fun and kind, but he usually reserved those personality traits for when the two of you were alone. Everyone else knew him as Ari Levinson, the football star with huge prospects – the NFL’s newest recruit, in fact – and a man with a dangerous streak in him.
But you knew him as just Ari, the boy you’d grown up with. The one who you’d watched funny movies with till the two of you peed your pants laughing, the one who’d always helped you study for all your tests. The one who you’d shared so many of your firsts with. Your first time on a plane had been with Ari when the two of you had jetted off to Bali (a graduation present from his parents). Your first-time smoking weed had also been with Ari (he’d laughed and assured you that the police were not going to lock you up for smoking a joint).
Even your first kiss had been with Ari. (“Don’t worry, I’m just going to show you how to do it.” Ari had assured you, “No strings attached, baby. I don’t wanna jeopardise our friendship, it’s the most important thing in the world to me.”) And show you he had, and you still remember his soft lips on yours, like a warm pillow working against your mouth. His breathless whispers against you, coaxing you to use your tongue, and his big hands holding you close to him, almost like he never wanted to let you go.
You’d kissed many guys since then, but Ari didn’t know about all of them. He seemed to grow upset and irritated any time you mentioned going on a date with anyone, let alone kissing and making out and all that other stuff. All of which you’d done with Steve, your current boyfriend. In fact, Steve had taken your virginity this past summer – but Ari didn’t have to know that. It had taken him weeks to accept that Steve was your boyfriend, you knew it would take him another year to process that you’d given your virginity to Steve too.
But Ari was just protective, you always reasoned to yourself. And there was nothing wrong with that. In fact, you liked how secure he made you feel and how he was always there for you. How he always dropped everything for you, even with the bazillions of girls who were after him. (Ari, with his rugged good looks, was always popular with the ladies. But being an NFL star boosted his popularity even more – he had supermodels regularly going in and out of his house. You could confirm, you’d run into one or two a few times).
“Hello? You still there?” Ari bounces you in his lap to get your attention. “It’s no fun torturing you when you don’t give me a reaction.”
“Sorry, I was just thinking.”
He nudges your nose with his and shoots you his winning smile, the one that makes his blue eyes sparkle. “I’m the one who does the thinking, remember? You just look pretty.”
You blink, “Steve says he likes it when I space out. He wants me to write all my thoughts down so he can turn them into poetry.”
Ari rolls his eyes, “He sounds like a douche.”
You smack his hard chest once more. “He’s not. If you just agreed to meet him once, you’d like him just as much as I do.”
“I doubt it.”
You bat his chest again.
“Ow! Okay, okay, I’d like him! Now can we stop talking about Steve when it’s you and me time?” Ari huffs, giving you a squeeze. “I finally got you all to myself for the weekend and all you want to do is talk about Steve.”
“Aww, I’m sorry, Ari. What do you want to do?”
The two of you end up putting on a movie and cuddling on the couch. It’s raining cats and dogs outside, but the steady pitter-patter of the water droplets against the window creates an oddly calming atmosphere. Inside, you feel toasty warm in Ari’s embrace, the big brunette holding you tightly against his chest as he spoons you and all you can hear is the movie mixed in with the crackling of the fireplace and your best friend’s steady breathing against your neck.
“I always get sleepy when we cuddle.” You yawn, giggling when his lips find your neck again. Cuddling with Ari was always fun – the two of you had been doing it for years. Ari had told you that all best friends cuddle like this, where the two of you are so close that you can feel every part of him. Even his hard crotch as it nestles against your ass, and every few seconds he shuffles or grabs your hips and moves you up and down. But he probably doesn’t realise what he’s doing, or that you can feel him getting… excited. He probably doesn’t mean to get excited anyways.
You sometimes get excited while cuddling with Ari too. Excited down there. But you’re too shy and embarrassed to ever tell him. You’re meant to just be best friends with him, for Godsakes! Nothing more!
“Ari?”
“Mm, sweetheart?” He mumbles against your neck, where his tongue is currently licking over a spot that he’s been sucking for a while now.
“I know you said that all best friends give each other hickeys while cuddling, but I don’t think Steve would like it if he saw these.”
Ari groans, not letting up at all as he continues to suck at the one spot on your neck. In fact, you feel his teeth graze against your sensitive skin and you gasp when he bites down. Not too hard, but enough to make the mark even more prominent. God, you’d need a lot of makeup to cover that up – you knew without even looking at it.
“There you go again, talking about Steve when it’s meant to be us time. Now shh, I’m trying to relax and watch the movie. You should try and do the same.”
You do try, feeling your eyelids grow heavy as you watch the movie play out on the television. The pitter-patter of the rain outside makes you feel even sleepier, so much so that you barely even register it when you feel Ari’s hands slip under your tank top. He did that sometimes, claiming that his hands got cold very easily and he needed the warmth of your bare skin to heat them back up – which was totally understandable. His palms always felt warm against you, however, but you knew that Ari knew best.
“Is this the new bra I got you?”
You yelp when you feel his hands cup your breasts over the material of your bra, giving them a few squeezes that have you involuntarily pressing your thighs together.
“Ari!”
His hands don’t move, instead he squeezes your breasts harder, and your face grows hot as your nipples stiffen, poking through the lace material and straight against his palm.
“Well? Is it?”
“Yes, it is.” You answer, stifling a yawn and deciding you’re too tired to fight him off you. He was just feeling extra touchy – he as like that sometimes. It was purely platonic and didn’t mean a thing. And it’s not like he was feeling you up, he was probably just trying to detect the material of the bra. It was one of the few (about twelve) lingerie sets from Victoria’s Secret that Ari had had delivered to your apartment a few days ago. He was always surprising you with gifts, it was actually very sweet of him.
“Good. I like it when you wear things I bought for you.”
“Mmhmm.” You’re feeling drowsier and drowsier, and it’s so comfy being in Ari’s strong arms as they hold you in place against his chest. Cuddling with Ari really was the best, and it just made you so sleepy…
“Go to sleep, baby.” Ari croons in your ear, giving you another tight squeeze. “I’ll be here when you wake up.”
*
Ari watches you drift off in his arms, his boner unbearably hard as he digs it into your ass. Fuck, you had the world’s cutest little bubble butt, and the way it was currently nestled against his dick was making him so fucking horny, it was unreal.
In fact, he was so riled up that everything you did tonight was making him horny. From the way you pranced around your apartment in those tight grey legging that made your ass pop, bending down to pick up God knows what and giving him an eyeful of your backside, making his palms itch to give it a slap or two. He’d gotten away with it in the past, various times while the two of you play-wrestled. And he’d just blame it on the innocent “rough-housing” as he’d smack your ass quickly in succession, loving how you’d squeal and dig your face into his chest in embarrassment. (Or pleasure, because Ari knew you secretly liked it).
And now here you were, cute little you practically unconscious in his arms. Wearing the pretty pink lace bra that he’d bought for you and cuddling up close to his chest. Unknowingly, you rub your butt against his crotch, making him groan in frustration. Goddamit, did you have to be so fucking hot? In your sexy leggings and your tight tank top that just about left nothing to the imagination. Not to mention how cute and innocent you were, and so much smaller than him, so much weaker than him…
“Fuck, baby, you’d run for the hills if you knew the thoughts I was thinking.” Ari tells you, giving your breasts another squeeze.
“What?” You mumble, but it seems like you’re halfway in dreamland. Which is exactly what Ari wants, because fuck it. He’s done waiting around for you, picturing you when he jacks off. He’s been doing that for years now, because he cums the hardest when he pictures you. All sweet and innocent, getting fucked by him in various positions. Crying because his cock is so big as it violates you, tears you open and claims you as he fucks you deep and hard, till you can feel him up in your womb. Till you’re screaming his name, telling him that he’s your daddy, telling him you’ll do anything for him.
Ari still remembers the first time you’d made him cum. You hadn’t been aware of it, but the way you’d bounced up and down on his lap, excited about some silly thing or the other, he couldn’t really remember. But what he does remember is busting a nut hard, your breasts pushed up prettily against his chest and your butt rubbing against his boner, practically milking his cock as he came in his pants. He’d had a taste of heaven that night, and that was years ago. He’d been sneaking more tastes ever since.
“But never the real thing,” Ari sighs to himself, his thumbs hooking under the waistband of your leggings. “I still haven’t been inside that tight snatch of yours, sweetheart. Isn’t that sad?”
You mumble something incoherent, clearly still half asleep. And Ari’s too horny to care, trying his luck by snapping the waistband of your leggings against your skin, licking his lips when you don’t stir.
“No panties, huh?” He teases you, slipping a hand down your leggings to cup your butt cheek and give it a hefty squeeze. “It’s like you’re begging me to fuck you, sweetheart. I wonder what Steve would think?”
God, Ari hates Steve. Hates him with a blind fury. He hates that the idiot blonde has weaselled his way into your life. Ari turned his back for one second (he was in the NFL, so football took up 90% of his time) and Steve just scooped you up before Ari could talk you out of it. He’s never officially met Steve, but he’s seen him. Seen him holding hands with you. Kissing you. Taking you out on dates. And Ari hates him for it.
Most of all, Ari hates that you let Steve fuck you.
“Oh, you think I don’t know that you’ve been a naughty girl?” Ari coos, chucking your chin and smirking when you pout in your sleep. He strokes your face with one hand, the other one still firmly cupping your bare ass from under your leggings. “My little baby girl, giving herself to another man. Let me tell you, baby, I was furious when I found out. I almost went over to Steve’s apartment and killed him with my bare hands.”
“But you’d hate me if I did that.” Ari sighs, pinching your cheek lightly. He licks his lips, lifting your tank top up till it rests above your chest, before pushing the cups of your bra down to your ribs. Your breasts spill out attractively, and Ari feels a thrill go straight down to his crotch. “I should’ve been the only one who ever got to see you naked. I mean, remember all those showers we took together?”
Ari had persuaded you on multiple occasions to shower with him in order to conserve water. Oh yes, he’d managed to convince you that he was all about saving the environment, and water conservation was number one on his list. And you hadn’t seemed to mind, giggling and washing his hair for him, not noticing how his eyes remained glued to your hot, soapy body, how his fingers itched to grab your hips, bend you over and fuck the living daylights out of you…
“But you just had to let Steve fuck you, didn’t you? Before I even got the chance.” He can’t help but dip his head down, latching his mouth on your bare nipple. God, he’d touched and fondled you over the years, but nothing like this. He tries to keep his excitement at bay but he can’t help but suckle the stiff peak of your nipple, growing hornier than ever as he keeps from suctioning your whole breast into his mouth, his one hand fondling your body while the other slips down to undo his fly and take his dick out.
“Mm, Ari… Is that you?” You murmur, sounding surprisingly eloquent for someone who’s meant to be asleep. But you’re indeed still asleep, softly snoring while Ari continues to have his way with you. He releases your nipple with a pop, gently turning you over so that you’re lying on your stomach, your cheek pressed against the arm rest of the couch.
“Now sweetheart, I’ll show you what it’s like to be with a real man. And I’ll make sure you remember it, even if you do think it’s all just a dream.”
He wastes not in slipping your leggings down to your knees, hungry eyes drinking in your cute, bare ass. He gives it a little smack, hands itching to hit you harder but he knows you’d wake up. And then how would he explain himself? Well, he could probably think of something (“I was just giving you a full-body massage, sweetheart. Your muscles seemed tense.”) You’d definitely believe it, since you were gullible enough to believe all the flimsy lies he’d been telling you for the past few years.
Ari presses a soft kiss to your butt, simultaneously grabbing a handful of your cheek and giving it a lewd jiggle. God, you were so sexy, lying down so nice for him as he violated your body. Well, it wasn’t a violation because he owned you. He’d owned you since the day he met you, and no sorry ass loser by the name of Steve Rogers was going to take you away from him. Steve may have gotten to pop your cherry, but Ari was going to make sure that that never happened again. The only dick you’d remember the feel of would be Ari’s, and that was a promise he was making to himself and to you. (If you were conscious right now, that is).
“You’re the hottest girl I’ve ever seen in my life.” Ari breathes, one hand on your hip and the other on his cock as he drags the tip of it up and down your ass. Tracing it over your butt cheek and smearing his precum all over the skin before he grabs and spreads your ass, pressing his dick between your crack and rubbing it up and down. “God, fuck, baby, I can’t believe you’re finally letting me do this.”
He spits, his saliva dripping down your ass crack and gathering in your puckered hole, making him grin. He’d fuck you there one day too – but you’d need to be awake and aware for that. There was no way he was stuffing his big dick inside your virgin ass while you were asleep.
“Ari? Feel kinda wet…” You mumble, trying to turn over but he presses his hand in the small of your back to keep you in place.
“You’re just dreaming, baby.” He tells you, stroking your hair to lull you back to sleep. “It’s raining outside, and so you’re dreaming of rain. That’s why you feel wet, sweetie.”
“Ohhhh, makes sense…” You answer, and Ari can’t believe his luck that you’re still asleep. Or not fully conscious… Same difference.
He spreads your ass cheeks wider, placing a pillow under your hips to prop you up. And then his eyes drink in your glistening pussy. And now he understands why you were mumbling about being feeling wet…
“Naughty little baby pussy, getting all wet just because daddy’s playing with your ass.” Ari scolds, talking to your pussy and not you. He itches to spread your wet folds with his fingers and give you a hard slap right on your bundle of nerves. But he knows the jolt from something like that might wake you up.
You’ve soaked the couch cushion underneath you, and that’s hen Ari knows you’re ready. Well, you’ll never truly be ready for his dick. Ari knows he’s bigger than average – enough girls have told him so. But none of those girls are you. He’s not in love with them like he is with you, all those supermodels and actresses are just placeholders until he settles down with you. Makes you his wife and fucks you good every single day.
“I can’t believe you’re asleep for our first time.” Ari whispers, gliding the tip of his dick up and down your slick folds. “I mean, I think it’s kind of hot, but that’s not the point. You weren’t asleep when you let Steve fuck you, were you?”
A spark of anger courses through his veins just then, and he can’t help but reprimand you by smacking your ass hard. And all you do is whimper in your sleep, his naughty little girl.
“I bet he didn’t even make you cum.” Ari breathes, mounting you and angling your hips upwards. “Not like how I will. And you know why? Because I’m your daddy and I know your body better than anyone.”
Ari still remembers the first time he made you call him daddy. It was during a game of truth or dare, and he’d dared you to call him daddy for the rest of the night. And fuck, you had done it. And his dick had grew harder and harder through the course of the night, as you addressed him as daddy all cutely, pouting those pretty lips of yours and blinking up at him innocently. Fuck, you had no idea how much of an effect you had on him. Even when he was fucking all those models, he’d imagine they were you. He chose the ones that looked like you, and sometimes he’d even call them by your name. They were too fucked out to notice, and it’s not like Ari cared about their feelings.
No, Ari only cared about you.
It feels like heaven as he slowly eases his dick inside you. You’re so wet and warm, your walls hugging his huge dick as if he’s being encased in warm velvet. God, this is everything he’d ever dreamed of, and he doesn’t even care that he isn’t the first one to fuck you. He supposes he could forgive you for that, because you’re his baby and he loves you.
“Nnngh, Ari…” You moan in your sleep before your body goes stiff with alertness, “Wh-What’re you doing?”
“Shhh, baby, go back to sleep. It’s just a dream.” Ari manages to coax you, despite the fact that your little snatch is squeezing his dick so good and he’s not even halfway inside of you but it’s such a goddamn tight fit and he knows that if you were awake right now you’d be crying from discomfort.
“Just a dream?” You murmur, before your body jolts and you let out another moan, “Mmm, Ari, so full…”
“Oh, baby, I’m gonna tear you in half.” Ari promises you, resisting the urge to drive his big dick all the way inside you from the get-go. No, you’re his baby, his princess, his best friend, and the love of his life. He has to be gentle with you – at first, at least. He doesn’t want to split you open and make you bleed. Well, he does, but there’s plenty of time to do that in the future.
He pushes his dick further into you, pinning your body in place as you squirm from the sheer size of him.
“I’m already fucking you better than that asshole boyfriend of yours ever did, huh?”
“Mmhm, yess….”
“Damn straight. I bet his cock ain’t as big as mine, huh?”
“Oh, Ari… Nooo.”
It’s a marvel that you’re asleep yet answering his questions, but he figures you think it’s all just a dirty little dream you’re having. He begins to rock his hips harder, still having trouble stuffing his whole length inside your tight pussy. Not to mention, your walls are hugging him like a vice, and he resists the urge to bust a nut every time he looks down to where you both meet.
“Call me daddy, sweetie. Like how you did that night we played truth or dare.”
“Daddy?”
“Yeah, just like that. God, I love how well you take instructions even when you’re asleep. You’re so perfect for me, sweetheart. I need to move you into my house soon. You’d like that, wouldn’t you? Being an NFL player’s girlfriend? Getting fucked by me every single night till you can’t walk straight ever again. That’s just half of what I plan to do to you.”
Finally, finally, Ari bottoms out inside you, his heavy balls slapping against your pussy as he shudders with relief. You’re moaning sleepily underneath him but all he can focus on is the delicious squeeze of your walls against his thick dick, and how well you’ve taken him.
“Good girl.” Ari praises you, giving your ass another hard squeeze. “Taking your best friend’s dick so well, aren’t you? Or should I say, your daddy’s dick?”
“Daddy…” You mumble as if on cue.
“Damn right.”
Ari fucks you hard. Well, as hard as he can while still ensuring you remain asleep. He keeps a steady pace, unable to bite back his own moans of pleasure at the fact that he’s finally fucking you. And you look so pretty, your soft body underneath him, tensing and clenching around him like it’s your job to take his daddy dick in your little fuckhole.
He grabs a handful of your hair, tugging your head to the side and spitting down on your cheek. Loving how your nose scrunches up all cutely before he reaches out to smear his saliva all over your face, making you look as slutty as possible. Slutty just for him, because after tonight, no other man would ever have you like this. Or have you at all, for that matter.
“Tell me you love my daddy dick.” He repositions himself till he’s lying over you, his body pinning yours down and his chest against your back, his hips pistoning in and out of you at a steady pace. He licks the shell of your ear lewdly before nibbling on your earlobe, “Tell me you love it when daddy fucks you with his big daddy dick.”
“L-Luh your dick!”
“My what?” He slaps your ass, doing it hard even though he knows he’s pushing his luck.
“Love daddy’s dick.” You murmur dutifully, and Ari can’t believe you actually said it. A part of him wonders if it’s all an act and if you’re awake, but one look at your unconscious face, albeit sweaty and breathing hard, confirms you’re still out of it.
“Fuck, baby. Daddy can’t hold on much longer, your baby pussy is just too sweet.” Ari tells you, feeling his thrusts get faster and faster as he chases his release. But before he can even think of what’s happening next, he feels you clench around him hard.
“Nngh! Daddy!” You whimper and your body quivers and tries to toss and turn except he holds you in place, watching in awe as you cum. You squeeze his dick so tight he forgets to breathe momentarily, just watching your sweet cream squirt out of you as if you’re being paid to squirt all over him. He forgets about his own pleasure for a second, hand sneaking down and fingers finding your clit. You jolt in his arms, whimpering and moaning underneath him as he rubs your button, pinching it cruelly before slapping it. Alternating between circling and rubbing, and does he imagine it or are you humping up against his hand as he does it?
You let out the cutest squeak in the world before you cum once more, and it’s enough to tip Ari over the edge too. He grips you so hard, he knows it’ll leave bruises on your skin. But he doesn’t care, his dick explodes as he releases his heavy load inside you, not caring that he isn’t wearing a condom. Not caring that you’re not on the pill (he knows, because he makes it his business to know everything about you). The idea of getting you pregnant doesn’t deter him at all, despite the fact that he’s at the start of his NFL career. That doesn’t matter, being a football player’s pregnant wife is a look that would suit you well.
And the idea of you pregnant with his baby gets Ari hard all over again.
“Look what you’ve done, sweetie.” Ari tsk-tsks, “You’ve got daddy hard again.” He strokes your hair back, wiping the sweat off your face as you breathe hard underneath him, miraculously still asleep. “But don’t worry, I’ll give you a chance to catch your breath before I fuck you again.”
He lays on top of you, breathing hard with his dick still lodged inside you, stroking your hair and cuddling you close. And that’s when your eyes flutter open.
“Ari? What’s going on? Why do I feel so…so…”
“Shhh, baby, it’s just a dream.”
“It is?”
He sits up, fishing out a pack of cigarettes from his pocket and lighting one before taking a long drag, looking down at your spent body that he’s just used and feeling extremely proud of himself. “Of course. Go back to sleep, sweetheart. Daddy’s gonna take good care of you.”
“Mmm,” The claws of sleep already have you closing your eyes again, and you snuggle up closer to him, a look of serenity on your face as if you haven’t just been fucked and filled with his cum. Cigarette between his lips, Ari offers you his thumb, smirking when you immediately encase it between your lips, sucking on it like it’s a lollypop.
“Love you, Ari. Thank you for always taking care of me.”
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FUCKEFNVD THE END! NFDKSLN IDEK! FEEDBACK IS APPRECIATED PLS TELL ME WHAT OYU THINK AND REBLOG AND ALL THAT GOOD STUFF THANK U BYEEE
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leclsrc · 9 months
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more than anyone ✴︎ cl16
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genre: childhood friends to enemies to lovers (a mouthful), smut, humor, Fluffff!!!!, angst
word count: 13.7k  
You moved out of Monaco at fourteen with an unrepaired friendship hanging by a thread. Ten years and a whole lifetime later, you’re forced to work with him confront it all over again.
auds here… hi hi hi!!!! HAPPY 4k to us guys!!!!! i am so insanely thankful for all of u and i will make this a longer note when i wake up tomorrow because i have so much to say but have this for now. i hope u like it,i love love love u guys forever also i changed the banner because i wanted to
nsfw warnings under the cut!
18+ because... penetrative sex, semi public sex, praise central, size kink (pretty tame smut in auds world)
You know it’s bad when your assistant-and-friend-aka-friendsistant (her vernacular) Rachel walks in with a free coffee without a quip about how dependent you are on this exact order of coffee (she’s a millennial, so caffeine and lack thereof are in her arsenal of Funny Jokes). You fear you didn’t correctly anticipate just how bad it was going to be when she stays instead of leaving to work on your schedule, combing a few fingers through her fringe and sitting herself on your couch stiffly. Maybe you’re intuitive, maybe you spend too much time with Rachel and you can spot the way she scratches at her eye, maybe both—but it’s bad.
You don’t take a sip from the Starbucks that sits idly on the coaster, opting to watch the latte sweat instead. You do stare, though, at Rachel’s stagnant posture, scrutinizing her every movement. She takes a few deep breaths and drops the bomb.
“David sent me to tell you he has good news. But there is, um. Bad news.” Dread writhes through you at the mention of your manager with bad news, and you clear your throat to compose yourself.
“What’s going on?”
She purses her lips. “He’s on his way over here. Just…” She cocks her head sharply to the glass door of your home office, expression antsy. “Sorry. Wait for him. I can’t tell you anything yet.”
You take a swig from the pity coffee. “Am I getting blacklisted?”
“God, you dumbass, no—” She makes an incredulous noise, but before she can open her mouth to elaborate, your manager walks in with an excited expression on his face, pocketing his Juul to take a seat by your table. His smile is the radiant one of a man over forty with a comical amount of Botox.
“Rachel told me you had”—you stifle the adjective—“news.”
“That I do, yes.” He hums, tracing the edge of your table. “Did you enjoy Paris Fashion Week?”
Beside the brash Frenchmen, God-awful timezone differences and consequent calls at half past three, hungover show attendances, posing for pictures until your ankles blistered, and a temporary diet of black coffee, cigarettes, and stale croissants—sure, it was fun. It was your job to attend anyway, your obligation to shake hands with important people and be photographed in designer clothing and benefit from the PR, but how often could people call work fun? 
“Sure.” You take another gulp off your coffee. “It was… fun.”
“Well, since your movie’s doing well,” David pauses and hums, “how do you feel about another few weeks of fun?” 
“Like Paris Fashion Week—weeks… this month?” You frown, eyebrows knitting together. Is this a new Vogue thing? You’re not sure how many updates they give the schedule, but you wouldn’t mind too much if you could travel again for a little bit. “So soon after spring? Did Anna want this?”
“Iiiit’s, er, Vogue’s new project. Capsule shows in Europe, coastal and summery. She wanted an exclusive guest list. She asked for you by name,” David says smugly. “Well, she called my office, granted. But to ask for you—”
“Are you fucking serious?” You stand up, and if you hadn’t had some fix of coffee you would’ve gotten dizzy. “David, tell me you’re serious.” Time seems to have suspended itself as you await his answer—which, if affirmative, would be a pretty big deal to you. 
“Yeah, I am.” He plays off a grin. “She loved your movie with Greta, and would love to send you to Europe to do PR on a few shows and pair up with some guests on a couple features. Exclusive stuff.”
You sit back down, mouth slack. “Oh, my God. I can’t believe it.” Your eyes dart to Rachel, who’s caught between a smile and an awkward purse of her lips. “Fuck! This is huge, David.”
“Yeah—okay, yeah, it is.” David shifts in his seat and crosses, then uncrosses, his legs, then his arms. He stutters for a second. “Good and bad news, remember?”
You blink a few times. You’d nearly totally forgotten the fact that this good news—and it is overwhelmingly good—comes with a bout of bad news, so bad apparently that it’s noteworthy enough to state alongside this massive deal. But it’s. Fine. It’s whatever. Worst case scenario, you’re going to need to fucking swim to Europe sans oxygen canister.
“So… the shows? Events, and shit?” He watches, waiting for you to signal that you follow. When you nod, he continues, averting his gaze to the face of his Patek. “They’re all in Monaco.”
Wrong.
“Monaco.” You repeat, deadpanning your delivery. It’s not out of the ordinary, the glitz and coast of the city being a perfect venue for high fashion. But Monaco is different for you, vastly different, and you tend to avoid the place to the best of your abilities. “Monaco. Are—you’re sure?”
“Mmm,” he hums in affirmation. “I know, I know you’re not exactly privy to Monaco because, bleh, childhood shit, whatever. But this—like you said, this is huge! And I don’t think we should jeopardize that.” He pulls a piece of paper from the folders tucked in his arm and waves it around.
“Well—yeah, I suppose. I’ll deal with it.”
“Yeah.” He sucks his teeth, eyes gliding over the scenery of L.A. that your window offers. “Okay, that’s it, so. Byeandhaveagoodlunch.” He slams the paper onto your desk, jostling you a little, but as he makes his exeunt, Rachel raises her arm to stop him.
“Is that it, David?” She asks, an edge to her voice.
You pick up the paper as they make hushed, stifled conversation, and find that it’s a call sheet of sorts, listing all the collaborators traveling to Monaco and what or who they’re in charge of, or paired up with, there. Models, athletes, celebrities, influencers—all making TikToks, or appearances, or brand deals, or interviews, or YouTube videos, the whole shebang.
“Yeah,” says David dismissively—nervously? “That’s it.”
You search for your name. “Okay. Um, hey.” Rachel turns to you, trying to catch your eye, which is busy scanning the sheet. “Did, um—did David mention you’re paired up with Charles Leclerc for a feature? Because you are. Paired up with Charles Leclerc for a feature, I mean.”
David sucks his teeth. “Thank you very much for graciously reminding me of that, Rachel.” 
Still half-distracted and growing increasingly worried with the exchange happening in front of you, you make haste in your search—eventually, you find your name, printed in plain letters beside one you’ve wished to never read over ever again.
“Wait, my Charles?” You pause and look up, suppressing a yell as your eyes widen, and you blunder over a pathetic self-correction. “I mean—no, sorry—Charles, as in Charles Leclerc? I can’t work with him, you know this!” 
“Wh—well, Vogue apparently wanted a really good Monaco-born pair and they seriously lucked out on you two. Also,” Rachel says, adamantly defending herself, “you’re always saying you can work ‘with anyone’!” She raises two comically vigorous air quotes to further her (moot) point.
“I didn’t ev—I never say that,” you lie straight through your teeth, mouth dry. You definitely do. You can place all the exact moments. “I would’ve known if I did. Rach—David—I cannot, absolutely cannot work with Leclerc. He’s my… we…” You shut your eyes and sneak two fingers upward to massage your temple, slowly caving into defeat.
David makes an oh well face and shrugs passively. “Fine. Then it’s either Anna Wintour’s special job that will help the Academy campaign or not meeting the ex-bo—”
“—friend.” You look up to cut him off, eyes narrowed. “Ex-friend.”
“Alright, kid. Suuuure.” David leans against the back wall of your office as Rachel comes to comfort you, her eyes already sympathetic and droopy. It shouldn’t be so bad, right? She asks sweetly, nudging the latte closer to your catatonic figure. You have seen him since, anyway.
With a despondent gaze, you just remain silent, refusing to state the negative aloud, opting to stare at the latte. At your disagreeable silence, Rachel continues, tone anxious: You have seen him since. Right?
You moved out of Monaco at fourteen, right after the school year finished and your father had gotten the opportunity to transfer out. The whole thing would’ve—should’ve, even—been a sentimental affair, full of tears and dramatic caresses of your bedroom wall, whispering thank yous to the city air in French and Italian, but it wasn’t. Months prior, you’d been preparing yourself for this kind of goodbye; but when it came to it, you merely kissed your extended family goodbye and slept en route to the airport, silk sleeping mask pulled taut over your shut eyelids. The only thing you left in the city was a letter written only to Gi and Cha about how much you’d miss them, with your email address scribbled at the bottom for an added touch, in case they felt like sending you longer messages.
“Do you two at least get along?” David asks, noting how genuinely aghast you appear.
“It’s not that simple.” You tap a nail against your desk a few times. “But I think it’ll be fine. I hope, at least. We used to be… good friends? As teenagers.”
You feel like an alien hearing yourself talk about it, talk about him and the whole circumstance a decade later. Your friendship with Charles was the only thing that mattered to your adolescent self, all lemonade stands and long car rides and stealthy conversations about your futures (racing and acting, respectively). It was happiness, in what you consider to be its truest form, it was lovely and real. And it ended abruptly, no goodbyes, no nothing.
“So it’s a no.”
“I’m just saying it’s impossible for me to work with him, and in Monaco no less?!” Your eyes are wild with frustration and anxiety at the prospect of your past whipping you in the face, full-fledged. “I don’t even talk about the guy or the city, how can I spend time with him there?”
“Are you seriously going to junk this amazing fucking opportunity just because of some petty childhood fight?” David’s tone is comparable to that of a dad’s, scolding and horrified, almost. “Look. If you don’t take this, career-wise, it doesn’t mean much. You get paid a shit ton, you’ll survive—you’ll do well. But emotions-wise? Maturity-wise? Be the bigger person and do it—I mean it.”
You stare back at him because you know he’s right. “Maybe it won’t be a big, long feature?” Rachel offers as some advice, some comfort. “If you reject it, his team will know, and so will he.”
And yes, you were fourteen, and yes it was petty and unexplainable even for fourteen—but there was a catalyst to all of this, a reason why the move became easy and forgetting childhood memories became second nature. A reason why you’re selective with who you make contact with from home. A reason why Giada and Charlotte are selective with topics they choose to bring up with you.
So, fuck it, really. That’s how you end up in Monaco, booked for the next three weeks, sharing a studio and public appearances and a 24-hour shoot with the last person you’d ever want to be in a room with. Ten years later—the person still is, and no doubt will always be, Charles Leclerc.
“MAMAN!” Charles’ voice was loud, loud, and so incredibly loud. You followed not far behind, legs running at full speed to try and leap onto his lanky figure and wrap an arm around his head to quiet him. It’d been futile: he ended up at the dining table facing his family with a victorious smile on his pink face. He breathed heavy, waiting for everyone to turn their attention to him.
“Charles,” you chimed in warningly, breathing even harder with the effort you had exerted to chase him from the sidewalk to here. “Don’t.”
“Guess who got the lead spot in the recital.” He slowly turned to point at to your angry face, and then bent, rifling through his already messy, grubby knapsack for something that he raised with glee: a headress that read…
“But-ter-cup.” Hervé sounded amused when he looked at your fuming expression. “You?”
“Yes, Papa! Maybe, just maybe,” he sing-songed, using the term wrong yet again, “she got the titular role!” He walked over to you and placed the headress square on your head, beaming. 
“There is no titular role in a school recital,” you seethed, burning with embarrassment. Your stellar academic record had apparently granted you incentive to be centre stage during the routine year-end recital, where years were lumped into twos or threes (in your and Charles’ cases, Years 8 and 9) and the student body would dance or sing a variety of teacher-selected music.
In your case, it was Build Me Up, Buttercup, complete with choreography you’d be practicing over the next month and a half. Charles laughed at your pouting expression, didn’t stop laughing even when you’d both sat down and twirled through forkfuls of spaghetti, didn’t stop chuckling even when Lorenzo got the turn to speak and he started talking about how Bringing Up Baby was his movie of the month.
You allowed him to laugh—even laughed yourself at some point—because all day, you’d been absently wondering how you’d break the news about your moving away to him.
Charles is not okay. He’d gotten off a red-eye from a short vacation stint, and now he’s back in Monaco, sleepy and a bit jetlagged, being briefed on brand deals and press junkets he has to accomplish by three p.m. today. “On the dot, sharp,” said his assistant, like the two didn’t just mean the same fucking thing. He’s patient, though, smiling through the exhaustion, through the dressing room, the tape around his waist and legs to measure clothes for this fashion… thing.
“A meeting for Ferrari, two TikToks, a vlog for your personal YouTube channel, three stories by noon… oh, and in the next few weeks, you’re going to film a Vogue-sponsored 24 Hours With… with—”
“D’accord, thank you,” he cuts in, already exhausted from the spiel alone. He’s a professional; no matter what people believed or what gossip rags liked to say about him, he maintains a well-kept reputation of being polite and kind to people he works with. Maybe it’s the jetlag, maybe it’s the lack of sleep, maybe it’s the heat outside, but today he just wants to close his eyes and sleep for days.
But the assistant follows, clipboard and Excel sheet and all, still spouting all his media obligations lest he forget (and mark his words, he definitely will). “Sorry,” he says. He’s new, probably assigned as a part of the Vogue team, lanky and tall and nervous looking. “I’m new. I’m Greg.”
Briefly, Charles is left alone to stare at his tired reflection while the assistants reconvene and connect. There’s several of them, each assigned or already committed to a different celebrity. Charles should know more details, but there’s only so much reading of a call sheet he can do before he’s conked out on Ambien; he trusts he’ll be around people much more famous than he is, probably American or English, actors and athletes alike. He’ll figure it out.
Yeah, she’s almost ready. Is Charles here? One of the assistants says, a bright-eyed American. They need to be introduced before 11. Her voice is quiet, quick and hushed, and Charles has to focus to hear what she’s saying. Greg chips in with something he can’t decipher; in response, the American whispers, Yeah, I’ll get her to sign it for you. Bring Charles out in five.
In five, he is indeed being brought out to the lobby of this hotel; the outdoor area is decked out with models, cocktail tables, Vogue signage and a carpet for pictures. It’s even busier inside, wait staff and event coordinators conversing in angry, aggressive French—table settings, mineral water, extra forks are needed. Greg keeps a steady pace transporting Charles through the indoor throng, and at 10:59, Charles is outside, by the pool.
“Um, right, yeah. Okay, uh—wait here. Your partner—not really partner, but like, mate? Fuck, definitely not. Um, partner. She’s on her way heeere…” He checks his phone. “Okay. You caught her name, right?” Charles nods to fend him off. “Okay. So, wait here.”
There are cameras taking pictures of him when Greg departs, some microphones waved his way; in the distance he spots fans waving crazily, sporting Ferrari merch. Charles is doing what he’s told (waiting, maybe posing a bit) when an even bigger crowd appears, surrounding one person; with their arrival, ameras click even faster, and an uproar follows. Greg waves him over, pointing at the person frantically, so Charles smiles, extends a hand, and when the crowd parts—
There you are, in all your glory. Pink dress, hair clipped into a bun, a tanline on your exposed skin, lithe hand coming up to shake his. Your eyes are flat but the lack of expression doesn’t inoculate them from beauty; they remain sparkling and pretty all the same. Cameras snap the interaction, seemingly innocent, seemingly the first.
He fights, he really does, to keep his hands shaking yours. He forces himself not to hug you, press a kiss to your cheek even if that might look friendly, caress a hand across your cheekbone, brush the tendrils of hair out of your eyes. It’s a valiant effort.
A valiant effort that pays off because, as soon as you’re ushered into a room by yourselves, your smile turns into a scoff; your hands are kept to yourself, slipping a pair of sunglasses on, and; underneath them, your eyes begin to roll. “I need a drink,” you huff, not even looking at him. 
You’re on two couches opposite each other, in what he assumes to be a foyer to a hotel room that’s much bigger than the one he was in earlier. A-list fame and that. The girl he’d seen earlier scurries off, mumbling something about a martini. Greg, beside him, goes: “Do you need a drink, too?” But he shakes his head.
“Are you voluntarily working for this guy, Greg?” You refer to his assistant by name, offering a sarastic, honeyed smile. You adjust the strap of your dress and he blinks his gaze away.
“Oh, no. I mean—yeah. Kind of. I was assigned to him.”
“It’s okay, I don’t expect you to do it of your own will,” you joke, crossing your legs.
Charles laughs dryly. “Who asked?”
“So he speaks…” You ping off his retort without missing a beat, a sardonic smile playing at your lips. 
“In the two minutes we’ve been around each other, you’ve insulted me and my assistant. I’d prefer silence, your highness.”
“Aww, did my joke and asking Greg a question piss you off?” You suck your teeth. “You must be fun at parties.”
“Do you two, um. I don’t want to, like, overstep, but do you know each other?” Charles notices that Greg’s forearm is signed by you and realizes he has no allies here, with an inward grimace. “Or if you don’t, like, are you two just… not in good moods or something?”
The girl comes in then, saying here’s the martini and catering you a sweaty glass with a smile. You offer up the empty space beside you, patting the white leather for her to sit down on. Your eyes meet his again briefly, catty and a bit challenging, before you turn back to the girl. “Sit.”
Maybe Charles spends too much time with Max, because he’s starting to become more and more inclined to getting the last word in lately. “Bossing people around, eh? Fame really does change you.” He offers a smile of his own.
“She’s my assistant, Rachel,” you say sweetly, but your smile is gritty. “We need to check my schedule.”
He wants to slap himself. “Too busy to open your calendar?” Nevermind, he’s a god.
Your sarcastic smile drops. “And what’s on yours? P6 this week, P7 next, DNF after?”
Fuck. The tension is so thick at this point, it’s almost steaming hot. Both the assistants stare at you, waiting for Charles to wedge something in, but he bites himself back. Thankfully, right as the silence just begins to settle like oil on water, the door swings open and one of the coordinators steps in, noisily rattling off the week’s plans and proclaiming you’re both free for the remainder of the day before things pick back up—Schiaparelli show at noon, both of you, front row—tomorrow.
The four of you filter out of the room, and you make a quip about your autograph on Greg’s arm, which grants your assistant some face time with Charles. She turns to him, combing a hand through her hair and furrowing her thick eyebrows. “Hey, I’m Rachel, by the way.”
“Charles.”
“I know,” she says sheepishly. “Listen. I know you two have history, she—we—she’s, um, told me about it before. I don’t know the whole story, and I’m not… like, I’m not saying I do, so I respect it, whatever it is. But I hope you can find it in you to work with her properly. It’s a huge gig for you both. So—yeah, uh. Great job, and good luck.”
She smiles with a nod before exiting the room, leaving Charles alone and stirring with thoughts and memories woken from wild unrest.
“Alors,” Charles had said, not turning from his position in front of your vanity mirror. He’d been picking at his face, stopping only when you tsked at him not to. “What is the problem?” His eyes flicked over to you, your lying figure on the bed exhaling little puffs of frustrated air to the ceiling. “Are you missing the recital?”
“Quoi? Non.” You gnawed at your lip, accepting your defeat. You couldn’t lie for much longer, not when you’d been keeping this under wraps for two months. “Listen. Charles.” He nodded, clearly preoccupied with something. “Charles.”
“Hmm?”
“Can you ple—look at me.” Your voice hardened.
He’d noticed it then, the curt cutoff of your voice, the absent look in your eyes. He knows you even through a mirror, even in the low light of your room. “Desolé. This pimple won’t go away.”
“Charles,” you said, groaning but allowing yourself to laugh. “Listen.”
“Okay.” He turned to face you, a spot on his chin red from how long he’d been scratching at it.
You shrugged then, suddenly scared to deal with the realness of it all. You didn’t understand why you felt so torn. “It’s something to do with me,” you said.
“Yeah.”
“I’m moving.” You rubbed at your nose, the cold draft coming in through the window causing you to sniffle. “Out of Monaco.”
A beat. “What?”
You closed your fingers around your necklace, scratching absently at the divots of the pendant. One, two, three little dips in the gold locket, tiny but comforting. “Yeah. In a few months, like, after school. It’s Papa—his job. It’s a whole thing.”
“Europe?” You shook your head. America.
“What… well, what does that mean, then?” His expression didn’t waver but if anything did, it was his eyes—desperate, seeking more answers, wanting them with a guttural, belly-deep desire. You’re his best friend, so if he has to let you go in this life, he at least needs to know everything about the move. 
“We’ll keep in touch,” you reassured, kicking your leg to further your point. “You were bound to get busy with karting anyway, so it’s like. Ça revient au même.”
“It isn’t the same,” he said, his voice thin and cracking. 
“You’ll be fine.”
“You have a very misguided idea of who I am.”
“Shut up. Come off it,” you laughed, sitting up straighter. “We’ll call everyday, and I’ll meet all the famous people who’ll get me a real acting job, and I’ll come for the holidays or summer or something. Things won’t change. Not that much, at least.”
“Maybe, just maybe.” He pauses. “Will you be here for my birthday, at least?” He’d made a big deal all year of his turning sixteen on the sixteenth.
“Charles,” you sighed. 
“No, yeah. I get it.” He looked down, rubbing his thumbs together, like he’s just been hit across the face. He will tell you one day it felt infinitely more painful than that. But at the time he shook his head and looked up at you, reached his pinky to yours, a thin slip of paper around the finger that matched your interlocked one, and didn’t say anything else.
Just: “We’ll be okay.”
You could pin a lot of adjectives on Monaco: picturesque, without a doubt; warm, glamorous, but you’d sooner die than pin the word home over it. The city is sprawling even with the little surface area it possesses, and only few things seem familiar. Your lodging is a hotel in Monte-Carlo, a penthouse suite that requires you to travel very little. It feels like a vacation.
And you embody the role of a vacationer very well—the first five, six days of your stay in Monaco went great, mainly appearances that lasted a few hours at most and several junkets to promote Vogue and your latest film, before you were free to do whatever you wished. You’d gone the touristy route already: shopping more times than you could count, trying your immense luck at the casinos, and eating at Michelin-starred restaurants; eventually all the fun blurred into each other and you found solace in naps instead.
Your troubles are not far behind, however, and they finally come after you on Day 7. The event coordinators had informed Rachel, who in turn informed you, that the first of next week’s agenda would be a photographed tour of the Musée Océanographique de Monaco, a grand seaside building right at the edge of the water. Today is, apparently, a day for you to “fraternize with” Charles, which meant you would once again need to put a façade over your less-than-kind appearance toward him.
Those are the concluding words of David’s very firm text, encouraging (read: coercing) you to settle things with Charles into some approximation of civility. You resolve things by calling him to skip over the awkwardness that comes with texting. It takes you all of twenty minutes and twice your body weight in courage to press the green telephone button.
“B’jour,” he goes, his voice quick. French people (he will hate that you called him French, even if it was just in your head; you relish in this) always talk rapidly. After some silence, he clears his throat: “Hello?”
Butterflies—some form of them, whatever—flutter in your stomach. “It’s me.”
He drops formalities and adopts a disinterested voice. “Huh. What do you want?” The butterflies have rotted to death.
“I need to talk to you.”
“To insult me again?” He sounds a little amused even over the phone, a breath of laughter landing in your ear. “Bah, I get it. We are enemies. You have no interest in reconnecting, et cetera. C’est tout ce que tu as à dire? I gotta go.”
Your face warms at his accusatory tone. “Wow, leave it to a guy to be charming, huh?”
“Why should I be charming with you?”
“At least be polite,” you taunt, but your voice lacks its usual edge. On the other line, Charles lets his own defiant tone ebb downward.
At least be polite. It’s the least he can owe you after ten years of forgetting. It wasn’t as if you two had a mutual agreement then, in 2013 when you moved away, to stop becoming friends. For months before you moved out, he completely stopped talking to you, like he’d forgotten you two were even connected, were even friends. What little words you two shared became petty and abrasive, and suddenly Monaco lost its color. The closeness you had with him, which for so long you’d convinced yourself was once-in-a-lifetime, was ripped from you, robbed from you—by him, no less, which hurt all the more. You’d given up on finding out why at some point. You waited for him to reach out. Maybe, you told yourself, just maybe, it would take a few months, a year.
Ten years of radio silence. He owes you that: politeness.
“It doesn’t matter,” you say to nobody in particular, in an effort to segue into the topic of your choosing. “Look, we’re supposed to be friends. In… on camera, at least. It’s disastrous if we look like we, you know, hate each other. We need to be professional.”
“For the cameras,” he says back, solemn.
“Yeah.” You wind a finger through your hair. “Just… for the sake of civility.”
You hear his little hums of consideration. “D’accord,” he says after a few minutes. “Truce, then.”
“Sure.” You smile a little. “I have to go.”
You were halfway through your mess of clothes when your mum peeked through your door, her hair held back by a headband. “Call you yet, poppet?” 
“Non,” you said, decimating your voice to a monotonous murmur. You looked up from the dress you’d been folding and offer a half-hearted, sardonic smile. “Je t’ai dit qu’il ne le ferait pas.” You were right: he wouldn’t call. What difference did a month make, anyway? This time, though, the usual victory of being right settled into an ugly disappointment in the pit of your stomach.
You wanted so badly to be wrong. To clamber to the telephone, to your Skype, to your cellphone, any of the three, and see his name flashed across the helm or his voice in your ear. Maybe he was dialing your number now, to ask if you wanted to grab dinner after the year-end recital, or to update you on karting, or to tell you Pascale wanted lunch.
She could tell, as all mothers can, that you’d been upset. The knit in your brows that didn’t go away, the bottom lip being chewed, the tight clutch of your fingers over the already-folded dress. She sighed. “I’m sorry, baby.” 
“It’s fine.” Your voice came out sharper than you intended and you have to roll it back, recede it, to sound more relaxed, more at ease. “It’s… fine. I’m fine.” She knew better than to pry, closing the door softly to continue packing up the living room.
You heaved a dry sigh to express the nausea that came with his absence. It began a month ago, two days after you first told him about it and poked at the zit on his chin. He’d buried his head in your shoulder until tears seeped into the cotton sleeve of your shirt, and you let him. You felt guilty, after all, for keeping it a secret for so long. You would leave in September, you told him. We have time.
Two days later he walked you home as always, on the “dangerous” side of the street, lanky legs skipping to the tree in front of your house. You pointed at the beginnings of clementines on its dewy branches, smiling, inviting him in, but he remained leaning against the trunk, playing with his mop of hair that covered his forehead.
“Bah, trop dramatique,” you said, poking fun. Lorenzo had showed you both some art house films he studied in class, and with the bout of French cinema, you and Charles had grown obsessed with making fun of overdramatic stills that often included the classic leaning-against-a-surface. “Come on, Mum made bouillabasse, I smell it.”
“We need to talk,” he eked out awkwardly. “I have something important to tell you.”
You dropped your knapsack, leather scratching against the concrete of the steps to the front door as you walked over to him. “Ouais?”
“I…” His lips moved, wobbled, but nothing left, so he shut them and his eyes, like he was considering something. His breathing slowed into one rhythm you find yourself unconsciously matching, just two kids looking at each other in the dusky breeze of Monaco, the orange sun casting shadows over the clementine tree. You closed your hand over his, a tight clamp over his knobby wrist with certainty. “I…”
“Say it.”
“I want to.” His eyes were shut. Exhale. Inhale, open. “I… I’m going… going home.”
You breathed out apprehensively and relaxed. “Oh.” You blinked. “That’s it?”
“Ye—ouais. Yeah. I gotta.” Already he was climbing to the gate, waving a half-hearted goodbye. “Save some for me, oui? Bye.”
“Charles,” you warned after him, voice tinged with concern. “That’s it, promise?” Your hand flexed around air.
“Cross my heart!” The last thing he ever said with any bit of something genuine.
You reunite with Charles at a meeting; under the guise of your truce, he makes the barely-necessary small talk. The rest of the staff file out of the restaurant in due time, but you both stay. You ask about Lorenzo and Arthur, leaving out questions you’d rather not listen to him answer, and he tells you they’re both alright. That his mum asks about you sometimes. That makes you smile. He asks if you’re still dating the guy you’d most recently been partnered with in Us Weekly.
“God, no. We never even dated, the… um, tabloids always make shit up.” You purse your lips. “Anyway. Is Lorenzo still in film?” You ask, turning your head a little. You don’t think you’ll ever forget his affinity for cinema.
“Not professionally, but I still sit through hours-long… you know, reviews, and stuff.” He laughs when he sees you laugh, eyes half-closed and meeting the ceiling.
“He introduced me to some of my favorite movies, especially when I got into acting and I was kind of… like, I wanted some inspiration, acting-wise. But not my actual favorite movie.”
“Which is?” He segues into a more personal topic. “Is it still Bambi?”
“Oh, it was, for the longest time!” You almost squeal with excitement. “Not anymore, though. It’s been dethroned, ha ha. I think it’s… I’d say it’s maybe Casablanca now.”
“How American.”
“Shut up.” Your face warms. “It’s so romantic. When he says—when he goes, um. We’ll always have Paris. And then, God—when Ilsa goes, I said I would never leave you—and Rick goes, And you never will… isn’t it so classic? Romance movies nowadays are—I, I, I… I get scripts sent to me that are just so bad, and they’re either too idealistic or too pessimistic, or too indie or too commercial, and.” You sigh. “It’s like nobody gets love right anymore.”
“Us Weekly disagrees,” he says weakly, after a period of silence.
“Stop,” you laugh warningly. “And don’t act like you’re not being paired up with different girls, too.”
For a minute you sit with the realization that you’ve both been keeping tabs on each other all these years, even just a little bit. It’s a bit jarring, it’s a bit warm, it’s a lot confusing. You make a move to ask for the bill but Charles is quicker, opens his mouth to implore your presence.
“Come see me tonight.” He says it like he didn’t mean to, like it escaped him on a whim, a blurted out confession born out of your memories and conversation. His voice is dreamy, faraway. “Earth to…?”
“Wh—sorry. Fuck.” You clear your throat and deduce your next words. “Where?”
“I’ll text you. A club, near your hotel.”
“Yeah… yeah, sure.” You hum an affirming noise. 
Your name is on the list, though you’re sure it doesn’t matter whether or not it was. No ID is needed, and paps catch a bouncer being dispatched to guide you through the nightclub toward the elevated area with significantly less people. It’s low-lit, smoky, vaguely blue and purple, smelling of flows of alcohol and fresh ice. An Azealia Banks song is playing, pounding through your head.
Tabloids don’t care about nightclubs. They care if you come out drunk or with a smidge of snow under your nose, neither of which have happened to you; entering is fair game, a fun affair, especially in a district like Monte-Carlo. You don’t have any explaining to do, not even to questions like are you clubbing with your professional Vogue collaborator, Charles Leclerc?
The collaborator in question is the first to greet you, getting up and approaching you with a smile so obviously tense. The picture in front of him is like if he’d conjured up a forlorn fantasy of his to life—your hair fell loosely over black lace, a hand pinched around the hem of your dress. “Hey.”
“Hi.”
“So.” He realizes he’s in charge of the socializing, and turns to properly introduce you. “Um, guys, this is my—friend—you already know”—he fusses over your name, which everyone in the world knows, anyway—“and these are my friends. Pierre, Alex, George, Lando, Daniel… you know Joris.” He points to each guy's face as he goes, eliciting a beam every time he gestures.
You wave with a polite smile before you station yourself beside the only one you know: Joris, with whom Charles shares a longtime friendship. He greets you first, with a side hug. “Long time.”
“Yeah, it’s been.” You watch him turn toward the low table, and back around with two shots, offering them to you with haste.
You thank the Lord that he makes quick, dextrous work of it, and before long you’ve downed a glass or three of some strawberry four seasons thing, socializing with the different people around the table. One of them, Lando, talks about your latest film for five whole minutes (“I rated it five stars on Letterboxd. I left a review, if you wanna see”) before he leans close and asks: “Are you his girlfriend?” His is obviously referencing Charles, and you pull back from the proximity to shake your head.
“No,” you holler to emphasize it. “We used to know each other. I grew up here.”
“Oh shit! Native!” He whoops, offering you another glass. This must be your fifth, maybe, fifth G&T or Cosmo or something or other of the night. You take it, drinking as you walk, planning to collect your bag to take with you to the bathroom—another hand takes yours, though, dragging you down the steps. Halfway through, you realize it’s Charles.
“How’s the drink?” He asks, brows straight.
“That’s all you wanted to ask?” You raise your voice above the bass. “Someone needs to teach you fucking… proper small talk.” A laugh involuntarily bubbles past your lips, eyes crinkling. 
He laughs, too, despite himself. “Non, I was—I was just asking. We should—I brought you over here to—so we could…” He realizes he’s been talking too fast without getting to the point and pauses, resetting himself with a pinched sigh. “Dance.”
Your heart pulses. Dance? You hear yourself ask. For wh…Why?
“For the sake of the truce.” His voice is light. “We should try being closer.”
“We were close once,” you say, loose. “Did you forget?”
He’s looking right at you, and you’re warm all over. “How could I?”
It feels too real. Not the words—yes the words—but the alcohol, the alcohol is what you’re referring to, and all those shots and drinks suddenly seem not as harmless as they’d seemed earlier. You scan the periphery for the WC sign and try your best not to look deranged on your way there, offering the same pretty smile to recognizing passersby. Behind you, Charles calls out; but you wave him off, heaving dryly.
The restroom is clean because the nightclub is outrageously expensive; you push yourself into the available stall that’s in your direct path and crumple above it. You heave. Heave some more. Nothing comes. The nausea rises and recedes, so you decide to wait it out.
The bathroom door hauls open, bringing with it a few seconds of noise before it swings heavily onto the frame again, sealing the sterile silence. The momentary return of the bass from the dance floor sends your head spinning all over again and you freeze, willing yourself not to wind up hurling your guts into the toilet. It’s a futile effort, though, because you’re feeling nauseated beyond your limit again, and you need water and maybe a salve or something.
“This stall is open,” somebody says, a chipper American voice that grows in volume as it nears you. A gasp follows, and then: “Oh, my God. Are you okay?”
You turn, your face flushed and lips parted. “I’m so sorry. I just—I’ve been nauseous all night.”
“I have water,” she answers, reaching her arm outward, as if seeking it. “Carmen, the water!” A bottle of Evian is thrust into her hand by another girl (Carmen, you presume), and she doesn’t hesitate to bend next to you to feed it into your mouth. She stares for a second, then goes: “On the off chance I’m lucky, and you’re the famous actress, by the way, I just want to say I’m a huge fan of your work.”
Eyes wide, you lock eyes with her and pull away from the water. “Oh, God. Yeah, that’s me. I’m so sorry—this is so humiliating.”
“It’s not—it’s normal,” she assures, nodding. “We’ve all… y’know, puked into a club toilet before.” From the stall doorframe, Carmen nods. “What’d you drink?”
“Fruity stuff,” you recall, eyebrows knitting at the memory. “And shots.”
They both grimace at the same time, knowing the exact feeling, the exact taste, it seems. “Are you heartbroken or something?” Carmen asks; Lily shoots her a look that can only really mean don’t ask the world-famous actress if she’s heartbroken. But you laugh it off, shaking your head.
“No. There’s a guy, though, and he’s… we’re… it’s a lot. I think I thought alcohol would absorb all of it, but… clearly, it did not.” Your lips simmer into a straight line and you’re quiet for a few moments before remembering you’re on a dingy club floor being supported by two nice girls who are strangers. “Anyway! Sorry. I’m clearly, um, delirious.” You get up on semi-wobbly feet, swallowing the nausea as you go. 
You walk to the sink, and behind your back, the girl and Carmen share a telepathic exchange (should we ask her to elaborate? Yes! Should we really? Fuck, no.) You rinse your mouth out, washing your hands and focusing on your reflection—your tired eyes, your smudged lip gloss, your fussed-up hair. You turn after rinsing, offering a small smile. “Thank you.”
“It’s nothing,” says the first girl, offering her hand and a tube of lip gloss. “I’m Lily, by the way. And just so you know—I’m so sure that guy has nothing on you.” Carmen, beside her, nods in solidarity, and your heart blooms.
Your smile grows as your hand shakes hers, accepting the lip gloss. “You’re too kind. Thank y—” 
“Lil? Baby, are you puking?” Comes a disembodied male voice from the door, ajar ever so slightly. Lily visibly cringes and walks over to the door, pulling it open further. On the other side—the detective of sorts—happens to be Alex, who you’d been introduced to a few hours ago. At the sight of you, his eyes widen with recognition. 
“We’re fine. Leave us alone,” replies Lily in a conspiratorial whisper. “Carmen and I have a new friend.” She doesn’t even need to drop your name; your face alone is enough to make people recognize who you are.
Alex, however, refuses to admit defeat. “Try harder next time.” He pumps his eyebrows. “We were introduced earlier.” He looks up and waves to demonstrate his truth; when you smile back, Lily’s jaw drops as she turns to her boyfriend again, aghast.
“What the hell? How?” A pause. “No offense. It’s like. Two levels of fame, right there.”
He makes a pinched face. “She’s Charles’… friend? I don’t—coworker? Something, something. They were both vague about it. Actually, George and I were talking about it, and we both think something is up. With them.”
“Wait—you might be right.” Her eyes are hyperfocused, and her voice drops to a whisper for a second. “Let’s talk about it at the hotel.”
You and Carmen watch their hushed exchange, and eventually Alex leaves you three alone again with a loud goodbye, which allows Lily to rejoin your conversation. “Sorry,” she says with a smile. “That was my boyfriend, Alex. I didn’t know you two were introduced! He told me you knew Charles?”
“Oh.” Your shoulders relax. “Yeah, um. We knew each other as kids, but I moved away and we kind of—we drifted apart, so. I’m here on a business trip, and he’s just welcoming me.” You try to reduce the decade-long mess into a sentence.
“So you’re friends?”
“Yeah.” You feel like vomiting all over again. 
The sky’s a searing blue at noon, silver clouds lining the horizon. Charles has to press a finger to the high point of his cheek to test if he’s sunburned from the heat, and the cameras catch it; he doesn’t doubt the fans will spin that into something cute later. You’re somewhere else on the property, this big, massive thing of a museum that’s crashed into by the waves.
He remembers Andrea first telling him about this whole arrangement. He and the team had deliberately left out any mention of you, like they could predict the immediate veto. He wonders if you knew, or if you, too, had been surprised when seeing him, a ghost of your past looking into your eyes. He wonders if you, too, are now in this endless emotional turmoil. Inside there’s a photoshoot ongoing, with you but also with some models in varying aquatic-related poses to convey the intent of the building; he’s done his share of pictures already, just needs to sit down with you for an interview. 
“And a B-roll of you guys, um, like, walking, like—around?” Greg’s voice invades his head again, the nervous man beside him running through a to-do list like this is boot camp.
You’d left him hanging at the club—he couldn’t blame you though. A truce hardly called for the bringing forth of memories you two are now supposed to have buried beneath you. Memories he buried first. But alcohol had loosened him, and maybe you had, too, your eyes in the vaguely bluish light and your smile.
He wishes to apologize. He makes up some excuse and finds you nursing an Evian by a faraway corner, against a screen of stingrays. Your eyes widen when you see him, in recognition. He waves and then, with a thumb, gestures to the catering outside.
You end up by the water eating one of the caterer’s churros, a recommendation he deems “very special.” (“Have you worked with these caterers before?” “No.”) It’s also his excuse to cheat on his diet and eat a churro or three—chocolate dip included, always. You rave over the taste, smile, enjoy the view. Charles realizes this looks deceivingly like a date, and at the same time realizes he would not stop to correct someone if they assumed so.
“Our truce seems to be working.” You say in-between chews, voice flat but eyes bright.
“It seems so. I owe that to my personality.”
You really laugh at that. “I didn’t know you had one. It’s very fit for someone as unapproachable as I am.”
“Who said that?”
“No, noth—nobody.” You comb a lock of hair behind your ear. “Aw, putain. I’m ruining my lipstick. Pat’s going to kill me. I look awful.” There are no reflective surfaces around you to affirm your statement, but you sound so sure of yourself.
He smiles. He enjoys the illusion, the mask that you two seem to wear, albeit involuntarily. The chocolate syrup he squeezes on your little paper box of churros. The muttered back merci when he’s finished. Your flushed face, eyes darting from the delicacy to the ocean, eyelashes fluttering, lips smiling, curving into a laugh at some random realization. Briefly he imagines what he might tell somebody if they stopped to ask if you were dating.
Some old woman, French accent and short in stature. You two are so cute. Si mignon! And she would ask how you two met. Charles would tell her the story. But that is imagination. He blinks out of it and focuses on the beauty in front of him, so very real.
“No. You are very pretty, you know.” He says then, and it’s taken him all his nerves and then some just to wrangle it out of his mouth and past his lips. Anticipatory, he watches you, waits for your response.
You comb the hair out of your face messily, licking over the cinnamon sugar on your lips; then you smile up at him, turning your head in question. “Sorry,” you laugh, and his heart’s frozen because it’s the prettiest sound he’s ever heard. “What did you say?”
The wind roars in his ears, so Charles barely hears himself when he says, stuttering, “What? Nothing, I said nothing.”
You make a face—confused, suspicious—but all your allegations quell once you bite into another churro, stepping yourself a path along the area. Having blocked off the building, production staff and models are all that populate your surroundings, big headphones and even bigger cameras, rolling around racks of monochrome and Hermés, Birkins to match Loro Pianas. It’s easy to get lost in a crowd—in a city—where everyone looks the same, and knows the other’s name. Perhaps that’s also why, even at fourteen, you were excited to leave, he thinks.
“The coast was always my favorite part about the city.”
He notices. The way your eyes have softened, become more fond than when you’re in the centre of it all, in the bustle. Here it’s busy, but less busy; the distinction, perhaps, matters. Your gaze is not one of distaste, of disdain. It’s nostalgic, homesick, yearning. He supposes he describes this gaze so well because it’s the way he catches himself looking at you over the week. 
“I wanted to…” He trails off. “I wanted to talk to you because, ah. I’m sorry. It was foolish of me to put you on the spot last night. I should’ve been more… yeah. I’m sorry. I hope you’re okay.”
You stare at the sea and nod quietly. Instead of responding, you launch a story: “I always…” You’re clearly lost in a different sphere of thought, and you have to fall quiet while finding the right words to say. “I remember, um. In Year 3, we—I came here with my mum. And I was super mad, because I got, like, three mistakes on my Maths paper?” You laugh and he does, too, but more because your storytelling is so effortlessly enthralling and funny and he needs to shut himself up.
“Anyway.” You pace around again, and he follows. “So, I’m mad, and she’s trying to cheer me up, buys me glace and everything, but no. So I go sit myself on a random bench. It must’ve been around here, I think.” You look around and point at an empty area. “There. But it’s—they must’ve ripped it out. Whatever. So yeah, I’m sitting there, and moping, and all of a sudden All You Need is Love by The Beatles comes blaring into the entire area.”
Charles’ eyebrows knit confusedly. “What, the bench area?”
“No—the whole pier, I guess? Like, it was loud, I almost jumped. And then this guy comes in holding this huge—this, um, board? Sign? Poster? And he’s got half the pier in on his whole thing, and I’m totally… it was just… yeah.” You smile. It’s the biggest smile he’s seen on you since you got here and the fact that he’s even around to see it gets him all warm.
“So what happened?”
“It was a flash mob. You know those—yeah, they’re usually insufferable, but that one was a little calmer. Nobody was, you know, dancing and yelling. It was just a bunch of people cheering and all, and the guy was actually proposing to his girlfriend. It was so cute.” You sigh a little, a brief exhale of air, and it turns into a smile. “I’d love that.”
He raises his eyebrows and, despite himself, laughs. “Vraiment?” 
You turn to him, ready to defend yourself, mid-laugh. “Heeey. Everyone says they find big, romantic gestures cheesy, but I think deep down, if you trust the person enough, you’ll like it. Maybe not a proposal, though—can you imagine the pressure?” You pause. “But I don’t know. There’s something so nice about just knowing that person loves you so much they think it’s worth it to share it to everyone around you. So even if it’s cheesy, I wouldn’t mind much. You?”
“It’s cheesy for me,” he disagrees, shrugging. “But I see your point.” Truth be told, he didn’t see you as a romantic type—but all he’s ever seen you do lately is work, and even back in childhood, all you ever did was study. He likes learning these little facts, ones you wouldn’t share in interviews—likes knowing you feel comfortable enough to share with him. “Dancing is a bit overboard.”
“Oh, definitely.” You throw your head back to laugh, eyes half-shut and crinkled and reflecting the sun. Would you look the same if he was dancing to The Beatles, proclaiming all the words he hasn’t had the courage to say?
Next question is who your first love was—we’re rolling in three…
“First love?” You laughed a little, facing the camera to continue your Screen Test interview with W. The questions had been candid and lovely, but they were about your career, which you answered with familiar ease. First love is different—uncharted, private territory. But you’d realized all this too late, and the director called go, and you let words spill out of you like a bag popped open.
“I want to be funny and witty and say acting, but that would be a lie. Um, my first love was a childhood friend. We lived near each other, our parents were friends, and I… I really did, I liked him a lot. But these—there were so many factors at tension with each other, like me moving away in 2013—that’s, what, six years ago now? And us being young and not really knowing how to communicate. When you’re a teenager, you’re kind of just like, oh, no worries, um, that’ll sort itself out, and then you grow up and look back and realize, these things never do. But I miss him a, a, a… a lot, and I think of him always.” Your smile didn’t reach your eyes when you looked at the camera again. “We learn a lot from childhood loves.”
Cut. Lovely. Just lovely.
“Thank you, Lynn,” you said with a small smile. A pause as silence creeps up onto the room, and then, quieter: “Could we omit that? I—sorry. I could answer anything else. First kiss, or something? I’m sorry, I just. Sorry.” For the first time in five years, you realize, you’ve conjured his memory again.
“Okay. What else do you remember?”
“I… do you remember the recital song?”
“Of course I do! The dance is… that’s a different story.” You’d been at Charles’ hotel room earlier to go over some video shoot regulations for a 24 Hours With video you’re doing in a few days. You stayed because—that’s beyond you at this point, and you’d rather not delve into the rationality of it all. You’re content with thinking about how nice this conversation is, a trip down memory lane.
“The dance, mon dieu, the dance.” He smothers a hand over his face, smiles fondly. “You were at the center!”
“Stop. Stop,” you protest, letting laughter settle into quiet. “It’s crazy, you know? How we… like, we share a life. Not—but like, we had a whole childhood together.” 
“And nobody knows.” It’s not something you keep a secret on purpose—it’s just that neither of you feel like name-dropping the other. Some stories have surfaced, but none of you have fully commented. Somehow, that’s a good thing for you.
“Do people ask?”
“People ask, yes.” His accent is a reminder of your past—you’d once had the same thick wraparound, the loose reign over English you’ve now grown to master. Now your accent is a lot thinner, to the point where it’s barely perceptible, and if it is, your coworkers and fans call it cute, chic, use it as a jumping off point to ask where you grew up. But in this hotel room, legs folded underneath you and glass of wine in hand, you have no coworkers or fans, it feels like; no one to perceive you but Charles. Charles and his accent, nostalgic and so very his, which you wouldn’t describe as anything but home.
“What do you tell them, then?” Quickly, you add: “The truth, or…?”
“That we knew each other as kids,” he says, smiling absently. “That is the truth, no?”
You cover a smile with the rim of your wine glass, nodding. There’s no revisionist history in that statement, but it hides a lot of the truth, the nitty gritty of it. You know it, he knows it, you both know it. “What would you want me to say?” His voice is soft and thin and imploring, so different from the boisterous voice he uses in public, from the slurred voice you heard in the club. This sounds real. This sounds like a conversation you would’ve had years ago in your childhood bedroom before everything went—
“Nothing, that’s fine.” You cut your own reverie off, clearing your throat. You even laugh, to alleviate the tension, but he sees right through you so many years later. “Unless you’re privy to telling people how we didn’t talk for months before I left.”
He blinks, smothers a palm over his face again, and sighs, eyes meeting yours. “I’m sorry. I don’t—I… I’ve wanted to bring it up.”
“I’m not mad.” It’s a half-lie. “Okay, no—I am, a bit. It just—it would’ve been nice to hear it two weeks ago.”
“I know.” He doesn’t even need to say it, but him saying it sends a low thrum of reassurance in you. Charles has found, in the two weeks of being in your company, that he accomplishes a sense of self—a sense of quiet, a sense of privacy—when he’s alone with you. Perhaps it’s your natural ability to bring out the best in people, to talk and loosen tongues and make everyone around you feel safe. Or, and this is on a likely front, maybe he misses being one of those people. 
He pretends he’s back to last week after another club rendezvous left you tipsier than the first time, dropping you off at your hotel room with two hands taut at your shoulders, one pinching a keycard. You’d been muttering something under your breath, stumbling as you went—you weren’t tripping too much, really; he didn’t need to hold you, but he told himself he had to—and leaning against the doorframe of your room, staring at him blankly. When he met your eyes, you said: maybe, just maybe. Just those three words. If he tries to remember right, you’d been smiling, but he was sufficiently tipsy, too, so he could just as well be wrong.
He does remember a few things right. The eyeliner smudged across your lower eye, lipstick smacked to a point where it looked like you wore none, beads of salt by your lip, your hand wrapped around your necklace. 
The silence is anything but awkward; still, he resolves to break it. “When you were drunk last week.” He looks up. “You said—you kept saying, maybe, just maybe.”
A laugh escapes you, stilted and a bit nervous. “Oh. That was—yeah, okay.”
“What’s it mean?”
“You seriously don’t remember?” You’re laughing for real now, your hair bobbing with it, eyebrows furrowed to emphasize your confusion. “Oh, my God. Charles, it’s all you ever said in Year… what, 7? I don’t… anyway. But when we were maybe twelve, I…”
Momentarily, you’re stunned by the memories of him—you’d forgotten they were even there. You press a few fingers to your lips and clear your throat. “Sorry. Yeah, I, um—I think you heard it in a movie or read it somewhere, and for ages it was your favorite saying. Maybe, just maybe.”
“I don’t underst—”
“—You were always just saying it,” you cut in, laughing, your voices layering as you discuss the origin of his former favorite term. “No, you really—”
“I don’t—I do not ever remember say—”
“—Well,” you say,  “I remember.” He stays silent for a few seconds, the intensity of your stare and the little smile on your face and everything beating down on him. For a split second he thinks of opening his mouth and getting on his knees and telling you everything, all the apologies, all the things unsaid in the months and years you became strangers. He seriously does. The pressure is almost physical, beyond overwhelming.
“I have to go.” You swallow the lump in your throat, disentangle your legs and clamber off the couch, setting the empty glass on his coffee table. “Good?”
“Yeah,” he says, blinking. “Yeah. Take care. Should I drive you?”
“God, no.” You laugh breathily. “I’ll see you tomorrow.” 
He closes the door after you leave, stares at it, as if that will conjure you back to him. It occurs to him, jolts him almost, that he’d almost let slip a quiet utterance of love you as you slipped out. His stomach boils. With thankfulness over not having said it, he wonders—or with regret?
“Best friends now, are you?” Lily, Carmen, and Rachel look up to the sound of your voice, their serious faces breaking out into smiles. If you could chart the time you spent here, there are definitely people you’ve spent the most time with—these three are at the top of the list. You hang your coat and drop your Chanel bag on the entryway seat, already picking up on the British noises of Love Island UK from the telly.
“Wait, so she’s hooking up with him?” Lily asks, confused; her train of thought is cut off by your flopping onto the bed. “Hiiii. Where’ve you been?”
Muffled by the bedspread: Charles’ place.
Silence. The television switches off and you hear the precarious preparation of three girls readying themselves for a debrief-or-sobfest of a lifetime, a noise you’ve heard and partaken in countless times over your life. You suddenly feel too watched, too spectated; you break the quiet by looking up, displaying your tear-streaked face.
“Talk to us,” Rachel encourages, her voice raspy with unuse (Love Island will keep one occupied and quiet for hours on end). Three of them are touching you in some way or other, reassuring grips on your hair or shoulders. “Did you two fight?”
And, oh Christ, fight? It’s not like you’re dating. You aren’t even halfway to that (not that you want to be, but that’s a discussion for another time). The idea of a fight with him is so terribly juvenile, so horribly reminiscent of secondary school and Monaco and being together and being friends. You can’t fight with a guy who’s not your boyfriend. You can’t fight with a guy you’re not close to, for Chrissake. You squeeze your tears out of your eyes and breathe hiccups out.
“Do you want gelato?” No, no.
“Love Island?” In a minute.
The truth is, you want both, but you really just want to sort everything out with Charles. It was no use—hating each other was futile, but pretending everything was fine in some pathetic attempt at a “truce” seemed even worse. You just want to talk everything out, even if it excavates feelings you’d once been able to suppress.
“What kind of crush doesn’t disappear after ten years?” You ask through tears. It’s almost funny, but the question comes straight from the heart. ��I’ve dated guys, lived across the world, started a whole new life pretending he never—pretending we were—fuck. Pretending he didn’t exist. It was—I’m not lying, it was easy, pretending. But one glimpse—I see him one time and suddenly it feels like all of it was in vain. It’s the same crush I had before, coming back, like it’s never going to leave me alone.”
“Maybe it’s not a crush,” says Lily, slowly.
“So what is it then?” You ask, hopelessly. What is this—this revival of memories? This little feeling, this sense that no matter where he is or what he’s doing, you’ll be just as in tune when you reunite even if it takes a decade? A decade spurred by months of being given the cold shoulder? What kind of magic is that?
She doesn’t answer, because you already know.
“Hey Vogue—I’m here with Charles Leclerc, and we’re here to take you along with us on all our little adventures here in Monaco.” Your smile is rehearsed, the perfectly-orchestrated blend of fun and serious, and when the cameraman calls cut, it falls into a more natural resting face. It’s the one Charles turns to and observes for any signs of a grudge.
The day is busy, which is precisely why it was chosen as the film day: three shows in the morning, press junkets for your movie and Charles’ season in the afternoon, and then a gala in the evening, hosted and attended by Anna Wintour herself.
The day’s business is only trumped by its tension, which reaches its crescendo in the janitor’s closet of the fourth floor of your hotel. It’d begun with a fight over the color palette, then a fight over last conversation you shared, then a fight over him fucking up the color palette, and then kissing against the door. Ironically enough, this floor houses a fair number of honeymoon suites.
It’s ironic beause hardly anything about this is or should be romantic—it’s a temporary fix, a pause from the turmoil, his hand squeezing your thigh. He’s gentle but you feel his possessiveness, lingering longer, higher and higher up until he’s playing with the high hem of your skirt. You knot your fingers in his hair, smell the shampoo and hairspray and cologne in the wispy curls there.
He kisses your jaw, then downward, until he’s licking, nipping at your throat. Charles.
“Yeah?” His voice is rough against your pulse point.
“Make it—we gotta—quicker.” Your hands tremble, heart hammering loud and bold in your chest. His voice is sure, gravelly, quiet, and you have to focus on something—so you centre on his hands, up your thighs and slipping under the lace of your skirt, bunching the fabric up around your hips. His hands, big and calloused, fingers resting on your hipbones, on your ass.
He’s hard against your thigh, straining against his jeans. You could cry. “I want more.”
“I know, baby. I know.” The pet name, so new but so natural, sends you into a dopamine rush.
You squirm when he doesn’t let up on his touches, over every inch of your body, groping you. He wants to take his time—he hates that he can’t—and counts on the possibility of a next time. You pull him in for a spit-slick kiss, needy and whimpering, sloppy and tongues knotted. It feels good—fuck, it feels like this was all you were ever made for, his touch. 
You buck your hips into the air desperately. “We really—fuck. We don’t have time.” Cameras, a shoot, a video; reminders ring in your head like alarm bells. He nods, goes I know, and you pick up the strain in his voice as he tugs his jeans down just enough to rub his clothed cock under your entrance, hard and drooling through the fabric.
You moan softly. “Please, I can take it,” you breathe. You’ve never been this wet, this worked up, this teased. You need to feel him, be full of him; he presses you flush against the door with a hand at the small of your back to keep it from aching too much, and drops forward as he pushes into you. Your noses brush and he goes deeper, air thick and muffled with little moans and whimpers.
His mouth is against your jaw, thrusting slowly to get you used to the size of him. The angle gets you dizzy, draws a burst of wetness out and gets you clenching around him. You’re flushed and sweaty, moaning. Feels s’good. So good, Charles, so, so good. He fucks harder, the door rattling, dirty talk cooed from his lips to your ear: Yeah? Feels real good? You’re so good for me, baby, come on.
Your needy voice, needier movements, are driving him crazy, getting him to fuck you harder, licking over his lips as he watches you fall apart on his dick. Relax, he slurs. You squeeze around him and moan, wretched and raw. Oh fuck, fuck, fuck. You’re so big. You’re getting his dick wetter and wetter with every thrust, shiny and drooling with cum.
Yeah? He says it so well, the best kind of reassurance. Come on, we don’t have time, baby. Let me feel you cum.
I know— you whine. I’m cumming—it feels too good—
You cum first, thighs shaky around him and lip curling into your teeth. You lean forward, mouth to his shoulder, and bite at the cotton. Fuck, he grunts, and releases then, a groan spilled into your hair. You watch, laughing breathlessly, and feel the world click into something different. 
You two will do anything, apparently, but talk this all through.
The gala is big and extravagant and you’re seated not with Charles this time, but with a roster of celebrities straight out of an LAX red-eye. Anna is at the table adjacent, andy you were able to talk to her about the experience, though not without leaving out bits with Charles in them.
You’re beside Florence and she’s talking about something, about a new movie she’s working on, and you chip in with jokes and laughs but your smile doesn’t really reach your eyes. You’re still caught in a web of fragile confusion. “I need to excuse myself for a moment,” you say after a while, after you’ve done nothing but smile and push broccoli puree around on your plate.
Consolation comes with isolation, at least tonight, at least right now. You find an empty balcony on the third floor, stare into the black sea. You try and try to remember what life was like three weeks ago, but it’s irrevocable now, the change that’s come since then. You tap the glass of your beer bottle against the marble banister, solid and probably expensive—a match for the rest of the hotel, you realize. It’s starkingly clean and smooth, and white, the kind of things you’d only say about a marble banister when you’re trying to avoid an adult introspection.
Behind you: “Are you okay?” 
In response, you say, “We shouldn’t have had sex.”
Charles settles himself into a spot near you, not totally beside but not too far—he, too, holds onto a bottle of beer. There are fancier drinks around, but somehow the dry taste of ale is all that brings you comfort right now. Your gears turn and, without prompt or question, you spill yourself forth.
“It was hard, when you didn’t… when we didn’t talk, and you didn’t ever tell me why, so I didn’t know anything. I keep remembering it, even now, what—ten years later, ha ha, even after… I don’t know, after the fact. We’re supposed to have moved on from shit that happened to us when we were fifteen but I’m finding it to be the hardest thing in the world. It was so… like, I had no trouble saying goodbye to anything else but you. And I’m famous now, my life is a whole thing, a—this whole party, and I’m supposed to… fuck.” You shut your eyes, and you can feel, through the thick fog of embarrassment and delirium, the tears that stain your cheeks. “It’s like. You know when you’re a teenager and you see all of it in movies and TV, this, like, moment where you’re staring at someone from across a room, and you’re smiling and talking to other people and you’re happy because you know in a few hours, you’ll be with that person anyway? At home, rearranging furniture, feeding the dog, eating leftovers? That… I always thought you’d be that person for me. Maybe because you were the only—you know—the only love I ever knew, and now, what. Four? Boyfriends and ten years later, you might expect me to feel differently—hell I expect myself to feel differently, but, unfortunately for you and me, I don’t. Sorry. I’m not—I’m not drunk, or anything.”
He stares at you, his expression soft and unreadable. It feels like it’s just the two of you in the world today, twenty-somethings, ten years later, unearthing all you left buried. “I…” he says, before pausing. “I’m sorry for leaving.”
You nod in response. 
“I always thought you would forgive me.” His face is sullen and handsome and your heart seizes. “I wanted to be your person.”
“How could I forgive you without an apology?” Your voice comes out fragile. “I leave in three days. You’ve fu—you’ve… you’ve kissed me, had sex with me, flirted with me. You’ve done everything but that.”
“I did apologize. I don’t think it was enough, but—”
“But you didn’t,” you reply, a jagged response. “You never said anything.”
“I wrote you.” His eyebrows knit. “I wrote you.” 
“You wrote me.” You repeat, deadpan. Your head spins with it. “What, a letter?”
“An e-mail. Before your first film came out—2014? A year after you… yeah.” He’s quiet and timid and nervous. “I forced Gi to tell me your address.”
“I didn’t… I wasn’t using that e-mail anymore. I haven’t in years.” You pinch your nose and let the silence settle like fine dust onto the room, an unspoken bomb that explodes over the both of you, raining regret and unsaid words. “I have to go.” You push yourself off the banister, turning already to the doors of the balcony. He stops you before you can step any further, a hand closed over your wrist, rough and warm.
“If you find the message,” he says, “will you read it?”
“I don’t plan to,” you lie. “Goodnight.”
From: Charles Perceval Leclerc <[email protected]>
Date: 14 October 2014
To: You
Subject: Urgent!
hey buttercup, I asked Giada for this email address. my bday in 2 days. Will you be home for Xmas this year btw? ill show you some new places that open ed + we can bike around. mum misses u a lot too. parfois je souhaite que tu ne partes pas… not sometimes but always. i think i need to edit this a little let me try ag
From: Charles Perceval Leclerc <[email protected]>
Date: 14 October 2014
To: You
Subject: Buttercup
j’appellerais mais je ne pense pas que tu veuilles répondre. it’s been more than a year since you moved out, in two days i’ll be celebrating my second birthday w/o you. i’ve been karting a lot, things are looking up, just like we always said they would :) just want to say i miss you a lot, and i hope you’re doing good. i would say i hate radio silence but i know it’s my fault all this happened in the first place. i’m sorry i stopped talking to you last year when you were moving away. i was being childish, but the truth is it was the only way i could handle it - by pretending we werent friends at all… i don’t want to make you pity me or anything (ne pense pas que je suis) but yeah you’re my best friend and you always will be. i’m sorry for being a knot head.
i was always scared to tell you but it’s been there since forever: i love you. i should’ve enjoyed your months here instead of leaving you in the air. i know i ignored you but it’s the 1 thing i regret. should’ve done a lot more, i know.. but i didn’t. we have a lot of promises i broke because i was being selfish. i kept the paper ring to remind me. remember that? we had a “playground wedding” when we were 5/6?
tu ne me dois rien - i just want you to give me a chance to make you happy, even if it’s just in the way we’ve always been (as friends). if you write me back i’ll try and fly there. mum is always asking me if we’ve talked yet. if not, that’s ok. i love you all the same and i will love you as you reach your dreams. this will never change. 
charles
p.s: est-ce que je te manque?
p.p.s: call me if you can and wish me a happy birthday?
“Rachel, I would sooner die than wait another two hours for the tarmac to clear again.” You try to up the firmness in your voice but it fails, only serving to make you sound less angry and more agitated. When all you get in response is a muffled I’m coming! you grumble and hang up the phone. Your plane was delayed all of three times, and the instant it arrives and is scheduled to take off on time, your friendsistant is nowhere to be found.
Lily and Carmen had thrown you a goodbye party the night prior, with sprinklers and music and cocktails, and promised to be on the next flight to L.A. Vogue and David had emailed you for a job done spectacularly, and to watch out for the videos and interviews’ release dates. Twitter is raving about your movie. Everything should be good, and yet, it’s not.
You check your inbox. IM COMJNG LILTIERALLY IM RUNNING THRU AJRPPRT!!!!!! You scoff again, hoping the plane doesn’t somehow take off for the fourth time, and take a seat on the VIP waiting area sofa again, shaking your now-empty chai latte. The room, sectioned off from economy and business, is fairly full.
A woman paces over to you, a bright grin on her face. “Hi. I’m a huge fan.”
“Thank you,” you smile, despite your tiredness.
“This is so embarrassing—but do you happen to have the time?”
“Sure”—you tap your phone open—“half past four.”
“Great,” she says. “Thanks, Buttercup.”
You’re opening your mouth to say you’re welcome, but it catches like cotton in your throat. You watch her depart like nothing happened, a strange feeling settling in your chest. You have barely any time to answer it, because a flight attendant is tapping you on the shoulder, addressing you by name, thankfully. She maintains a tone of professionalism all throughout her announcement that the aircraft under your name will have to evacuate the runway in ten minutes or less.
“I know, I know—I’m just, um. I’m waiting for somebody. She should be near now, though.”
“Tremendous. Merci, Buttercup.”
“Wh—” You stutter, blinking and watching her leave. “What?”
She doesn’t turn, walking to the kiosk to exchange information with her coworkers. You look around the airport, for a camera hidden somewhere maybe. Perhaps you’ve been unknowingly listed in some Impractical Jokers skit.
Rach hurry you text instead, leaning back and hoping you’re in some grandiose delusion. Your phone dings. Omw promise! It reads. Then: Look up buttercup
Your head snaps upward faster than you can register what you’ve just read, matching the opening notes of a song you’ve grown all too familiar with in your lifetime. The opening beat to Build Me Up, Buttercup flows like honey through the room’s intercom and floods it with life.
Mouth agape, you watch as the staff and guests perform the routine you’d learned at fourteen, complete with hops and turns you were too embarrassed to do even then. They’re smiling and whooping themselves and each other as they go, finishing the entire first verse before turning collectively to the entrance of the room. There, in all his glory: Charles, wearing an entirely too-small headdress that reads Buttercup, worn dusty from years of being stored away.
He’s dancing, too, closer to you. You refuse to budge for the express purpose that he dance some more, which he complies with, though not without an eyeroll and an exasperated sigh. Your heart beats with something irregular and warm. You’d told him about this before. He’d listened.
The music settles for a little and the dancers do, too, so he takes the time to raise his sign. Will you forgive me? It reads. No pressure. Except kind of. You laugh, throwing your head back at the gesture, at this entire affair that must have taken some amount of effort to prepare. As the lyric comes on, so does his sign: I need you… more than anyone, darling.
He drops the sign when you approach him, arms crossed over your torso. He removed the headdress and places it gingerly on yours. “I believe that belongs to you.”
And, hyperaware of all the eyes and yet the complete lack of cameras—you’re grateful for it—you finally, finally, finally pull him in for a kiss. You’ve kissed before, done your worst, but still means volumes to the both of you.
In-between kisses and cheers (from voices belonging to Lorenzo, Rachel, Lily—so many familiar ones), he says it again: “I’m sorry. I’ll make it all up to you.”
“You better,” you tease into his lips, smiling. “I know. I love you.” Ten years later—your person still is, and no doubt will always be, Charles Leclerc.
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lambertdiary · 5 months
Note
FAKE DATING WITH MIKE PLEASE IM BEGGING YOU the plot can be whatever you want but please
A/N: The 'fake dating' trope is genuinely one of my favourites so it's safe to say I had a lot of fun coming up with the plot for this one. I'll post a part two if you guys enjoy this one, so please let me know what you think!!
Word Count: 3.5k+
Warnings: language and I guess that's it
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This Love Is Just For Show
It was a slow day at your job. Even though it was a Thursday morning and it was usually really busy at this time, the number of customers coming through the door was significantly lower than any other morning, but you were thankful that you didn’t have to do a million things at the time this early.
You worked at a coffee shop and have worked there for a while, so you were used to the crazy job and by this point, you remembered most of the recurring customers, but you always waited for one in particular.
You heard the little bell that indicated that a customer had entered the coffee shop, so you quickly finished arranging the coffee cups behind the counter before turning to greet your customer. You fought the smile that threatened to creep its way onto your face when you saw who it was, and gave him a nonchalant expression instead.
“Hey Mike”
“Hi” He greeted you back with a smile.
“You want your usual, right?”
“So no small talk today, I suppose” Mike leant his forearms on the counter.
“Sorry, it’s kinda busy back here”
He looked around at the almost empty café “I’m not gonna steal more of your time then. I’ll have my usual”
You took a medium cup and used it to cover your smile, marking up his exact coffee order and writing his name at the bottom.
“You know, my offer to go out for coffee still stands. Maybe at a place you don’t have to make it”
You giggle as you put down the cup, typing a few words into the computer in front of you “You’re very sweet Mike but we’ve been through this, I don’t-”
“Date customers, I know” He finished your sentence.
“Look at that, you do remember. And yet, you keep on asking”
“Just hoping you’ll change your mind, I guess”
You shook your head “Not gonna happen”
“Alright, I’ll stop” He took out his wallet and paid for his drink “I’ll just try again in a month or two. Thanks”
He immediately walked to the other end of the counter to wait for his drink, constantly eying you while you took someone else’s order. You were looking his way too, but way more discreetly than he was.
When he finally got his coffee, he thanked your coworker and walked towards the door, turning his head around for a moment to face you “Bye, I’ll see you tomorrow”
Your eyes lingered on the glass doors after he left. You thought he was attractive, sweet, funny and just nice to have around, but you didn’t know whether you liked him like that or not but sometimes you thought you’d like to find out and go out with him, but you couldn’t do it. The real reason you had rejected every single one of his invitations wasn’t the one you gave him every time he asked, it was because you got out of a messy relationship 6 months ago and you weren’t ready to commit to anything, not yet.
Hours later your shift finally came to an end and you were ready to get out of there, you had a lot to do after all. You were in a hurry, so after taking all of your things you made your way to your car and drove to the grocery store.
After finding a parking spot you entered the massive building, guiding the shopping cart in front of you. You were so wrapped up in your thoughts looking down at your phone as you checked your shopping list, you didn’t notice the familiar face quickly approaching you.
“Y/N?” Your head snapped up as you immediately recognised the voice. You forced a smile while trying really hard to keep your eyes from widening.
“Nick, hi” The shock of seeing your ex-boyfriend for the first time since the breakup was more evident than you had intended.
“It’s been so long, how have you been?”
“Good, things are good” An awkward silence took over your conversation as quickly as it had started. The two of you smiled at each other politely, discomfort present in both of your eyes “How about you?”
“Amazing, actually” You nodded at him in response, unsure of what to say next. Thankfully, someone else joined the conversation. A girl you recognised as one of Nick’s friends from when you were dating him.
“Y/N! It’s been so long” She approached you for a hug, which you politely accepted.
“You remember Emily” Nick said as you pulled away.
“Of course, hi!”
“This is so funny, we were just talking about you last night” Emily said, standing closer to Nick and slowly wrapping her arm around him.
“You were? Why’s that?”
“She suggested we invite you to our engagement party this weekend”
Engagement?
“Oh my god, you guys are engaged” If you weren’t in shock before, you certainly were now “That’s amazing!” You wrapped your arms around them and pulled both of them into a hug, hoping this would prove to him that you really were happy for them. Even though that was far from the truth.
You pulled away after a few seconds, building up the perfect fake smile “I know it’s a bit of a shocker since Nick and I were just friends when you guys were dating, but I hope it’s not weird or anything”
“Please, not at all. I- I’m really happy for you guys”
“Thank you” Emily held your hand momentarily before dropping it and taking it back to her financé’s arm “So, are you coming?”
You thought about it for a moment. You really didn’t wanna go, but you thought that if you showed up you would show them how okay you were with their engagement. Even though you weren’t, since you broke up with Nick just six months ago and out of nowhere he’s engaged now, and you… you hadn’t even gone on a single date since then.
“Of course I’ll be there”
“Great! Should we save an extra seat for a special someone?” Emily asked with a wink.
You could feel your face burn as you thought of the lack of a love life, but your mouth was faster than your brain “Yes, I’ll bring my boyfriend with me”
Fuck.
“Oh” You hear Nick whisper.
“I mean I’ll ask him if he can make it, but you know, he gets really busy sometimes, so-”
“Okay, well I’ll have Nick text you the details later but I guess I’ll see you on Saturday!” Emily pulled you in for another hug, and Nick just waved at you as the both walked away from you.
You were left standing there alone, feeling like a complete loser. You didn’t have feelings for him or anything, and you wished you didn’t care about his engagement but you just couldn't help it.
Your relationship with him was complicated, and your breakup was so messy it took a while to pick up the pieces, and the main reason for that was because he swore he would never want to get married. After being together for a couple of years you moved in together for a few months, leading you to think he’d propose eventually, but he said that was the most you’d get from him. Now six months later he’s engaged to one of his friends…
You barely had the energy to finish with your grocery shopping. You were cursing yourself for saying you would go to their engagement party and on top of everything making up a fake boyfriend. Why couldn’t you just say you were busy? Any other answer would have been better than that.
You went home with a lot on your mind, and Nick’s text with all the details for Saturday just made it worse. You let out a loud sigh as you collapsed on your bed, going through your contacts list to see if you could find someone who would be willing to be your fake boyfriend for a night.
You quickly gave up as you realised how crazy it would be to make such a request, so maybe it would be better if you came up with an excuse and said you wouldn’t be able to make it.
Unless…
You typed Mike’s name on your contacts, hoping you’d find his number there. He gave it to you a couple of months ago, written on a napkin after going to the coffee shop for a week straight. You were almost crossing your fingers, urging that your past self saved it, but you assumed you got rid of it since it wasn’t on your phone.
You sigh again, too tired to think of more solutions.
⋆ ★ ⋆ ★
The next day wasn’t any better. The party that was taking place the next day was flooding your mind and unfortunately for you, the possibilities of ending up looking like a loser in front of everyone were high.
Everyone around you seemed to notice something was off, but with the busy morning that kept everyone doing something they didn’t have time to ask you the reason. That was definitely a relief, you would hate to admit what your current problem was.
Customers kept coming and that almost made you forget about the whole fake boyfriend thing, until you saw Mike approach the counter with a big smile.
“Hi” You shyly smile back at him.
“Hi, I’ll just have my usual”
You nodded as you grabbed a medium cup. You were debating in your mind whether or not it would be a good idea to ask him for help, but the simple thought of those words leaving your mouth made your face turn a bright red.
“And I’ll also have a cupcake”
You looked at him with furrowed brows. He had been going there every day for at least a couple of months and he never tried something new, so him making an addition to his order took you by surprise “Oh, what’s the occasion?”
“Buying a few extra seconds, I guess” He replied like it was no big deal. He took out his wallet ready to pay for his order, smiling when he noticed your blushed face.
If he was willing to buy a cupcake just to talk to you for a little longer, maybe he would be down to go to a party with you and pretend to be your boyfriend for a night. After all, he had been begging you for a date nearly everyday since the day you met him, and that would count as one, right?
You looked at the cupcake tray that was sitting next to you, naming the cupcake flavours while you kept a collected expression despite the heat rushing to your cheeks as you wrote your phone number down on his cup, right next to his name.
“Uh- we have vanilla, chocolate, blueberry-”
“Which one is your favourite?” He interrupted you.
“Red velvet with cream cheese frosting”
“I’ll have that one”
You tried to suppress your smile as you reached for the cupcake, blushing a little harder when your hand brushed his “Enjoy it”
“I will, or I guess I’ll let you know what I think on Monday” You looked down and grabbed his receipt, keeping your eyes fixated on the screen in front of you when you handed it to him “Thanks” Mike said, and you panicked when he started to walk away, and once again your mouth acted on instinct.
“I get off at 4” You spit out, making him stop and take a step back as you cursed yourself for how pathetic you sounded.
“Huh?”
“Today, I- I get off at 4” You repeated, thinking of something else to say “You can call me and- and maybe I’ll see you later”
A smile appeared on his face “Yeah, sure. I’ll give you a call” He nodded quickly, but stopped when he realised “I’d love to have your number, though”
“On your cup”
His smile grew bigger, and you could almost notice his tinted cheeks “I’ll talk to you later, then”
You nodded as he walked away, pushing away your embarrassment as you fixed your face to attend a new customer. You tried to stay focused on the order, but the cheeky smile from your coworker made you blush again.
“Shut up” You said, rolling your eyes at her.
The rest of the day went by painfully slowly. You were dying to check your phone to see if he had called you or at least texted you, but it was so busy that you didn’t have the time for that.
At the same time you were hoping he’d take his time reaching out to you. You felt guilty dragging him into your little show and you knew if you went out with him you wouldn’t be able to stop yourself from asking him.
When your lunch break came you literally ran to the back to get your phone, your heart skipping a beat when you read the last notification.
Unknown: Hey, it’s Mike
You saved his contact right away, and then took a little too long to think of a response, writing and deleting the message a few times before finally sending one back.
You: This is Y/N!
You rolled your eyes at your own message, and only a few seconds later your phone started ringing, his name showing on the tiny screen. You froze for a moment, but rushed to answer when it rang for the second time.
“Hi” You said in a shy tone.
“Hi. Sorry for calling but it’s way easier than texting”
“Don’t worry, I agree” You let out a little giggle before continuing “I guess I should apologise for earlier today”
“What do you mean?”
“You know, writing my number on your cup-”
“No need to apologise” He interrupted you “I’ve been meaning to ask you, what changed?”
‘I ran into my now engaged ex boyfriend and made up a fake boyfriend so I desperately need your help’ you thought to yourself, but of course you couldn’t say that, not yet anyway.
“I, uh- I thought about your offer, and coffee sounds nice”
“Well… I know a place, they have the best red velvet cupcakes-”
“Definitely not here” You stop him before you let out another laugh, even though you knew he was joking “We can meet somewhere else, what time do you get off?”
“Oh, so you really did mean tonight” Mike sighs loudly, taking a hand to his hair as he tries to think of someone who could babysit his sister.
You squeeze your eyes shut, trying to bury your embarrassment at how desperate you sounded “Sorry, we can try some other time-”
“No” He’s quick to cut you off “I just need to find a babysitter for Abby-”
“Who’s Abby?”
“My little sister, but the babysitter leaves at 6”
“Right, I understand” You try to think of a solution without sounding more desperate than you already were, but maybe it was for the best if you didn’t see him tonight.
“I’m gonna call her and ask if she can stay with Abby for a little longer tonight”
That makes you feel bad, thinking about his little sister stuck with the babysitter just because of your big mouth. You start to come to your senses, there was no way you could lead him on like that.
You let out a loud breath before saying “Mike, actually I think it’s better if we leave it for another time”
He stays silent for a moment, but then finally replies “Uh- yeah, that’s okay”
“Sorry, it’s just-” You stop when the clock on the wall tells you your lunchtime is over “I have to go but I’ll see you on Monday”
You hand up the phone immediately, the guilt coming back to you for a different reason.
You spend the rest of your shift thinking of excuses for your absence to the party, knowing that that’s what you should have done from the beginning. When you leave you’re so caught up on your thoughts you almost don’t recognise the person waiting for you outside.
“Mike?”
“Hi, yeah- uh sorry” He put his hands on his pockets, looking down at the ground “You sounded a little weird on the phone earlier”
“I had to go back to work, sorry”
“Right, I know… so, about the coffee-”
“Y/N!” Mike is interrupted by a voice you hated to recognize. You closed your eyes momentarily as you let out a breath, mentally preparing yourself to talk to her again “We have to stop running into each other like this”
“Emily, so nice to see you again” You say with a convincing smile.
“You too” She inspects your outfit and the building behind you, a smirk appearing on her face when her eyes landed on you again “I see you’re still working at the café”
You don’t say anything but your blood starts to boil, but at the same time you’re trying hard to hide your embarrassment.
Mike looked at you as soon as those words left her mouth, trying to read your expression, but when you didn’t say anything he decided to jump in “Hi, I’m Mike”
“Oh hi, I’m Emily” They shook hands and she carefully examined him almost entirely, and Mike dropped it after just a moment “I used to be friends with Y/N. Well, with her ex boyfriend, but he’s now my fiancé” She said as she showed off her ring, and the two of you simply nodded “Oh… you must be Y/N’s boyfriend”
Emily’s eyes fixated on you, giving you the same intimidating look she always gave you, making you break and fall into a moment of weakness “Yes” You replied, and she immediately turned to Mike to give him a hug.
“You should’ve said that before, she was telling us about you last night”
He was looking at you with a million questions as his eyes gave you the most confused look you had ever seen on anyone. You mouthed the word ‘Sorry’ as they pulled away.
“You guys are coming to the party tomorrow, right?”
“We can’t make it, sorry” You grabbed Mike’s arm and pulled him closer to you, giving him an apologetic smile.
“Oh well that’s a shame”
“You never said anything about a party, baby” He looked at you, amusement building in his face.
You were sure your face has never been more red than it is right now, you truly didn’t know what to say to that “Uh I- I’m sorry, I guess I forgot”
“We’ll be there”
“Mike, what are you doing?” You whisper to him.
“Great! I can’t wait to see you guys tomorrow”
She starts to walk away as she waves you goodbye, and as soon as she leaves you turn to face Mike, your apology already leaving your mouth “I’m sorry, Mike I’m so sorry, I don’t know what got into me-”
“Who was that?” He interrupted you “And most importantly, why did you say I was your boyfriend”
“That was my… I used to know her when I was dating my ex boyfriend” You explained, scratching your head as you tried to think of the answer to his next question “I don’t know why I said that. I panicked but of course that’s no excuse, I shouldn't have said that, I’m so sorry”
“What did she mean you told them about me last night?”
“I didn’t, I swear I didn’t” You simply reply, but he urges you to continue “I ran into them and they invited me to their engagement party, which already was so crazy cause I didn’t think Nick would ever get married, but he would give that to Emily I guess” You start to ramble, but stop when you realise you’ve said too much “She asked me if I would bring someone with me and I don’t know why but I said yes”
“Does that have anything to do with you giving me your number today?”
“No, of course not” You rushed to reply “Look, I’m sorry I got you into this. It’s stupid and it’s immature, you don’t have to worry about her thinking you’re my boyfriend, I promise I’ll call her”
You stared for a moment, waiting for him to accept your apology, although you’d understand if he didn’t.
“I can come to the party with you”
“What?”
“I mean she’s not very nice, why give her the satisfaction? Plus, I already promised we’d be there”
“No, Mike you don’t have to do that-”
“I tried asking you on a date for weeks, I’m not gonna let it go to waste now, even if it’s not real”
You stop to think for a little too long. If he was down then what was the problem? Asking him to do that for you did cross your mind anyway, so now that he was volunteering himself you shouldn't feel as guilty, right?
“It’s just going to be for one night, and knowing Emily there will be so much free food and drinks, you just need to stay with me and maybe hold my hand a few times”
"Deal"
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Thank you so much for reading! Please let me know what you think, likes and reblogs are highly appreciated!!
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sunraies · 1 year
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Don't make a sound
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Rafe Cameron x Kook!Reader
Warnings - 18+, Smut, toy use, edging, swears, awkward moments, underage drinking
At a family dinner party Rafe has control over his new favourite toy.
First smut written/ ever posted. Proof read once. MDNI.
The grip on your fork was so tight, you may have been worried your perfectly manicured hand might bend it.
But you had other things on your mind. One person in particular. Fucking Rafe Cameron.
The glare you sent in his direction was enough to make that stupid, adorable smirk appear as he tried his best not to laugh. He looked far too amused for your liking and your patience was wearing painfully thin.
You other hand was holding the seat of your chair so tightly that your knuckles were turning white. Rafe had caught your glare as he glanced down and gently brushed his fingers over your hand while reaching into his pocket.
The longer you gripped the chair, the whiter your knuckles got and he barely stifled a laugh as his hand played with the remote inside his pocket.
Your visibly relaxed and you released your grip from the chair. It was an effort to keep yourself from wiggling but you straightened up your back and you let out a deep breath you didn't know you'd been holding.
As he moved his arm around the back of you, you leaned more into his side than you wanted too because he had done this to you and you didn't want to show him any type of affection. He was being cruel and he knew it.
"You okay, baby?" he asked far too confidently, his smirk never leaving his handsome face.
"Rafe," you warned in a whisper, narrowing your eyes. "You know exactly how I'm doing."
His laugh was rich and amused, causing a few looks from others at the table. Sarah who sat on the otherside of you, glanced between the pair of you trying to figure out what was so funny.
Rafe lifted his hand to cup the back of your neck and pull you in so he could press an affectionate kiss to your temple. It was so sweet it almost made you forget you were angry at him for what he was doing.
When you woke up that morning, you had not planned for the weekly family dinner to go this way.
You and Rafe had been dating for over a year and your families had known each other since childhood. Your father and Ward worked closely together while your mother and Rose ran in the same social circles.
The family dinners were how your friendship and relationships with the Camerons grew. Ever since things became serious between you and Rafe, you'd been staying over more and more. Young love as your mother would call it, at least they knew you were safe at the Camerons. If only they knew what you were actually up, which you prayed they never did.
Rafe's present was met with excitement eariler that evening but somehow you had imagined it be more fun.
The small panties were cute and cupped your ass the right way, making it easy to go under any outfit and tight enough to secure the vibrator perfectly so that your clit was both begging for relief and crying for a climax.
He must to have known how this was going to go and as you sat at dinner you were doing everything in your power to win this exchange.
You had been comfortably laying on his bed, waiting for him to finish in the en-suite so you could start getting ready when he came out wrapped in a towel.
"Let me choose, what you wear tonight" He stated as he dried his hair. It was wasn't a question, more a demand.
"Sure," you shrugged, getting up and kissing him as you passed by. "Make sure it's cute though"
Not that you had to say it, everything you owned was cute and Rafe had good taste. Whatever he picked out would be perfect.
You found out the exact reason he wanted to pick your outfit as a grinning Rafe, held the remove in hand while you inspected the panties.
"You want me to wear these?" You raised an eyebrow at him.
"Come on, baby. Dinners are always so boring"
He had a point. They had always been more for your parents than the rest of the families. The only times they were fun was after the formal meal and the senior members retired to the lounge.
It took hardly any convicing for you to put them on. After you asked Rafe go easy as you didn't know the settings, he let you have a taste of the first couple. It was a pleasant buzz that seemed to build but nothing to extreme.
You tried not to moan as the gentle vibrations, pulsed against your clit. Rafe held your hips as you held his shoulders. His eyes studied your face, checking if this was something you'd enjoy.
"Don't make a sound and I'll make it all worth while" He said softly, a playful glint in his eyes before he kissed you.
"So, when are we going to hear wedding bells?" Rose, not so subtly suggested as she took a sip of wine. Every dinner she would ask and every time she'd get the same answer
"Rose, we are only 20" Rafe sighed, moving his arm away to resume eating. He never made eye contact with your father, terrified one day he'd get more that a nod of agreement.
"Pfft," Rose waved her hand "Age isn't a reason not to get married!" She was already a few glasses in.
She was sweet and kind but once she had a "problem" she needed to "solve" she would try her hardest too. People at the county club were already talking about the next Cameron wedding.
"So, Sarah could marry John B?" Wheezie asked "because she al-"
"Wheeze!" Sarah cut her off "Shut up"
"Already what?" Ward asked, looking between his daughters, trying to seem calm but he looked terrified Sarah had gone an eloped with John B.
Wheezie looked down at her plate as Sarah shook her head. "I...I told him I loved him" Sarah lied "it was meant to say between Wheeze and I"
The was a pause before the seniors at the table laughed.
"Ah, Young love" your mother smiled.
A saying she loved to say when the kids were up to something in they relationships. Sarah saying she loved John B, you practically living with Rafe. It was all young and free. There was probably something more behind it but you never wished to know.
The main course and different conversations was just long enough to make you forget, you were dripping wet, soaking through the thin fabric of the panties that were pressed tightly against you.
It was when you were ready to talk to Rose about collage opportunities that he found the remote in his pocket again.
He'd started slow but you felt it building as you did everything you could to keep from tripping over your words. Rose didn't seem too phased, more impatient that it was taking you a bit longer to explain your choices than concerned about why kept you sipping your wine.
He was grinning, watching you as like his own personal show. It was kind of smile that made your stomach do a flip. His smirk was dangerous but these smiles were rare. So rare that you were concerned. He had something planned.
Rose settled into conversation with your mother, while you looked carefully at the food in front of you. You got one forkful to your mouth when he adjusted the level.
An involuntary squeak slid past your lips and you put your fork down, crossing your legs quickly. Once again your glare made him chuckle and you sat back, riding the waves of whatever it was he was going to give you.
If he was going to make you cum at the dinner table you'd best to keep from making a scene but you were going to enjoy it. Hell would freeze over when Rafe let you cum without teasing you first but maybe that's what all of this had been. Just was one big tease, right?
How wrong you had been, it wasn't enough. He was edging you at the worst possible time and there was nothing you could do about it.
You glared and he moved his hand from his pocket to pick up his drink, sipping from it as if he had done no wrong. The vibrator was just low enough that you could still feel it, you were keenly aware of it's motion, but you couldn't get off.
"Are you ok?" Sarah whispered, the fork dropping against your plate had caught everyone's attention.
You nodded "Fine. I'm fine" you shakily smiled at her before downing your wine.
No one questioned it as Rafe happily topped the glass. You were going to need it to get through the rest of this dinner.
"You're cruel," you muttered to Rafe, lifting a shaking hand to go back to eating. At least it was low enough you could eat.
"Not cruel if you like it," he replied, putting his arm back around your chair, making no more to turn in off.
Your jaw set stubbornly and you finished your food, soaking up any moment he gave you to approach your edge.
Every time you were close enough to reach your climax he eased you back down. The vibrator never stopping but never going strong enough for relief.
When dessert came around, you were practically panting when he switched it off again. You let out a soft sigh.
By the time you'd finished eating you were sure there'd be a wet spot in the chair you were sitting in, the thought making you cheeks burned.
Rafe wanted to continue to play his game and at this point you were desperate to see it through. All you wanted was the orgasm he'd chased away from you so many times.
As you listened to Wheezie talk about a fight at school. You felt the toy kick to life again.
He was done giving you and it a break to keep it from getting too hot but this time it was on a sudden high setting. With no warning you gasped and letched a fraction forward, gripping your glass tight before moving back so you could enjoy this as much as you subtly could before he took the control again.
"I know! It was brutal!" Wheezie exclaimed, thinking the gasp was at her story.
"You need to not be so involved," he said nonchalantly to Wheeze. Only mildly interested. "You could have been hurt"
"Nah, I was no where near it"
"If you think that was 'brutal'. You should have seen the cat fight between Tanya and Margaret!" Rose shared her story of two women at the county club and thankfully everyone was paying attention.
"I can't focus," you whispered almost whining as you shifted yourself. He didn't look at you but you could see his smirk, he was listening to you. "Baby, please"
"Please what?" He whispered, leaning closer to you.
"Please let me cum," you whispered, cheeks and ears turning burning at the thought of muttering those words right here.
No one was listening but you were aware that anyone could look in your direction and take this moment from you.
"After dinner"
Your eyes narrowed and he nodded to the plates in front of you. Everyone was done and now you just need to hear
"Should we move to the lounge" Ward spoke, standing up "thank you for a lovely meal, as always, I trust you children to clean up"
Once the seniors were gone and Sarah and Wheezie took plates to the kitchen, you stood with shaking legs. Glancing down at the cushion, there was a small wet mark which you quickly flipped over but not before Rafe saw.
"What a mess, baby girl," he muttered, nudging you with one arm towards the stairs. He covered your back, hands on you hips as Sarah walked out the kitchen.
"Not feeling great" Rafe sighed "Do you mind? And We'll do next week"
You were so thankful you didn't have to clean up as Sarah nodded. You could have kissed her.
You legs shook as Rafe guided you out the room. He knew you weren't going to make it up stairs so he led you towards the study.
There was no one to see as the two of you slipped in the room and locked the door. 
You could hear talking, realising the lounge was right next door as Rafe pushed you against a wall, hands braced in front of you and your face turned so your cheek touch it. The sound of his belt being unbuckled was almost deafening. Never had the thrill of maybe getting caught felt so good.
"You're a mess," he whispered, his breath tickling your neck as he leaned in to press a few kisses to it. "And in public, pretty gril? What a little slut. You even asked me to let you cum out there."
The whimper you let out was quiet but he pressed one hand to your lips to keep you quiet while the other cupped you.
"So wet" he smirked as you rocked into him. The added pressure of his hand and his lips on you neck barrelling you towards the edge again. "You like almost being caught, hm?"
All you could do was nod as he removed the panties, hiking up your dress. His other hand guided his cock up and down against your wet slit.
" Rafe please" you almost begged, despite for him, for the relief your been craving all night.
He laughed softly as he pushed into you all at once. Even as he'd stifled your sound, his own was swallowed down by kissing you neck.
A rumbling noise starting in his chest was only loud enough for you to hear.
His thrusts were intentional, he knew how to make you scream and you tried your best to stay as still as possible so no one would hear the sound of you fucking. Your were soaking wet, dripping as you felt yourself quickly approaching the orgasm he'd denied you from having so many times.
He held both on your hips, holding you in place so he could fuck you harder.
"You have to know how fucking hot it is, when you are like this baby," he whispered, lips brushing the skin just below your ear. "It took everything in my power to control myself. These trousers aren't comfortable when you're as hard as you make me. Fuck you feel so good."
A small desperate whimper escaped you. It was an unspoken plea. You desperately needed to cum. He could feel you tightening around him and your body was trembling with an attempt to control yourself but he knew what you were doing.
"What a good girl," he mumbled, grinning before nipping at your shoulder. "You can cum. Go on. Make me cum with you."
It hit you like fucking train and you leaned heavily into the wall as your body shook. The orgasm you'd been chasing all evening was more intense than you'd experienced before and while you contracted around him, his cock pulsed.
His forehead rested against your back and he panted, giving you both a minute to calm down before he pulled out, tucking himself back into his pants and stepping back to admire his work.
You reached behind you, flicking your dress back into place as you stood up from how you'd been leaning against the wall.
"You did make a sound though," he teased, smirking again. "We'll try better next time"
Fucking Rafe Cameron. That smirk was going to be the death of you.
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meanbossart · 5 months
Note
do you have any thoughts on cazador as a character? personally i really loved the parallels between him and astarion & the way that the master/spawn relationship is used as an allegory for cyclical abuse. the scene with cazador’s master’s skull where you find out that he was once victimized in the exact same way that he later victimized astarion was really a lightbulb moment for me re: what vampirism represents in this game.
BOY DO I, i don't think much of it hasn't already been said, though. He's a tragic character in his own right of course, not that that takes away from the awful man he is.
Me and my boyfriend make fun of him a lot, we call him "the best BG3 character" as a little inside joke between us and come up with ridiculous scenarios of things that might have occurred throughout those 200 miserable years the spawn had under his command lol. Maybe he had a month where he was really specific about the shoes everyone wore, maybe once every other decade he had a weird week where he tried to be "nice" only to become frustrated when his efforts weren't immediately met in kind by the rightfully-terrified spawn, maybe between all the torture and horrific-ness he just did some plain weird shit like making someone crouch by in his fainting couch and wait by open-handed for grapes that he dramatically chewed on and then spat right out since he can't actually eat them lmao
And that's hysterical but I think we also started doing that because when you meet Cazador, when you first hear his voice and see his demeanor in person your immediate reaction is probably somewhere along the lines of "THIS is the clown you were so scared of, Astarion?"
And the answer is, of course, yes. This embarrassing little man stuck in a cage of his making instills fear beyond comprehension in Astarion and all his siblings. This man who undoubtedly showed all these spawn, inadvertently, the strangest, most arguably "human" aspects of himself at some point or another during these two centuries they had together is also an absolute monster. And i really like that! I think its far more effective and fitting for his story than if he was, lets say, a Ketheric type.
(this got very long so, more under the cut)
Look at Ascended Astarion in the epilogue now, for example. Everyone agrees that he's an absolute fucking dork - and I think we all also agree that he will go on to destroy the lives of many people beyond repair, especially his own, until the day he is killed.
In the topic of vampirism as an allegory for abuse, I both agree and also don't, at least not exactly - i just think it's deeper than that. I've spoken about this in another post but i find it incredibly refreshing how, to me, it seems like Baldur's Gate 3 has no interest in painting vampirism as sexy or fun past a surface level. It's a curse that nobody asks for unless put in a situation where they feel as if they have no other way out, and it shapes and haunts you for the rest of your undead existence.
Even if you enjoy its benefits at first, that has a time limit. You will see your family and loved ones die, you will see culture evolve while you stay perpetually the same. You will experience so much hurt and pain because the only thing that makes life truly sweet is knowing that it is finite, and eventually it will wear down all of your humanity. And since you can't die unless you are scorched by the sun, staked, or dismembered, you must live with the knowledge that you will never have a peaceful death - and since you won't have a peaceful death, you better not die - and if you don't want to die, you better not be weak - and if you don't want to be weak, you must seek out power at all cost and slash things like love and friendship out of your life.
And what is funny, is that in his attempt to be more like a mortal - to eat, drink, walk the sun, such incredibly simple desires - Cazador (and Astarion, if he ascends) is accidentally only drawing further away from the person he supposedly once was, because that fear of weakness has already utterly corrupted his soul.
That's quite a grim way to look at it, of course. But I genuinely think that it is the natural conclusion of something like immortality.
That's why I quite like that, even after Astarion has found happiness, even after he finds his peace, he still doesn't exactly embrace being a vampire - because It's not something he should be expected to embrace. I think it's a very unique take on the trope.
I also want to leave here this message written by his character writer, which really got me thinking about him on a deeper level since i saw it months ago. It is specifically about the sexual aspect, but I think it branches beyond it too, when you think about it.
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megabuild · 5 months
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"Is Etho's Lab Autistic?" - the greatest thread in the history of MCYTblr, locked by a moderator after 12,239 pages of heated debate,
NOT INTENDED to be a diagnostic resource or an "accusation/truthing" of Etho being autistic, but rather comparing autistic criterion as printed in the DSM-5 with various clips and common autistic experiences, since he has many autistic fans who relate to him. Also because it's a little funny and it's always fun to see more Etho clips. Some of these clips may overlap categories.
A: Persistent deficits in social communication and social interaction.
Unaware of social conventions or context; makes socially inappropriate comments (especially to strangers)
Bdubs: "One of the first things he said to me... Bdubs, you are always sick. I never get sick."
"I was at the DMV, for like, fifteen minutes."
(Gem: "Sometimes the things that come out of your mouth are... unexpected.") "That's how you get laughs, Gem."
Lack of theory of mind (difficulty or inability to recognise cognitive differences- assumes everyone thinks similarly and will understand any references or explanations made, no matter how particular)
"PLETHORA!"
"It's the same noise tigers make when they chuff."
"Feel free to boo if you wish." ("Boo!")
B: Restricted, repetitive patterns of behaviour, interests or activities.
Idiosyncratic or metaphorical language (language that has meaning only to those familiar with the individual's communication style) (also extends to a very particular or idiosyncratic sense of humour that appeals only to themselves)
"The Office is a good show..."
"Objectify them! Objectify them real good!"
"What's the deal with bathroom... peanuts...?"
"This is probably the greatest story you will ever hear in your lifetime."
"And he's like, Etho, don't go in there."
Echolalia (immediate or delayed repetition of sounds, words or phrases)
"Meow!"
"Deh-deh-deh!"
"We got go get wool!" (More mature jargoning than echolalia, but still)
Rigid thinking (difficulty or inability to understand humour, irony, or implied meanings)
"That's Not What That Is."
"I don't have social skills, Grian.."
Particular interests, often on unorthodox things or with uncommon levels of intensity
Sourcing exact clips for this one is tricky, but being a Minecraft YouTuber is one of the most autistic things a person can do imo.
Specifically, a redstone Minecraft YouTuber. Who invents stuff like the Nexus.
(On fireworks, something he's made frequent references to and also tried to make as a kid) "I'm like a kid in a candy store right now!"
Anxiety around change/transitional periods
"Whenever I'm recording a new series with a bunch of new people, the stress... I start to feel it in my stomach." (Gem: "Aw, that's anxiety!")
C: Other things I felt were relevant but couldn't decide on a category for
"I used to go out after rainstorms and pick (worms) up..." (Guude: "Would you let them go ever, or-") "No, I usually forgot about 'em... found 'em later all dried up..."
Cleo: "To be fair, Etho never claims he's a grown up, he just sort of.. giggles and runs away."
"Guys? GUYS?!"
Hiding in the bathroom at MCC
Vaxxed?
Mannerisms such as his "sleepy" or monotone voice from earlier years, or "whisper-shouting" rather than actually yelling.
Thanks
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anantaru · 4 months
Note
You think rape is funny? Maybe once you fucking experience it you won’t. Fucking cunt.
hello. so I'll just jump right into this. tw. discourse tw. mentioning r*pe.
@saetoru made this claim about me:
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saetoru, could you add proof at least? i can not remember a time where i would repost a joke like that so i'd love for you to show me proof please, this is all I'm asking.
also how was it on your dash, on your own dash and @dottores dash, when you have never followed me? + but maybe it was the for you feature that was the same for the both of you.
accusing someone without proof is not okay, again, i can not remember doing this so if you have a screenshot add it so i can remember and apologize, but i can't do anything because i don't remember saying a joke with SA in mind.
before that i just want to mention: i don't think r*pe is funny, i'm not a dark content blog either so i do not really reblog dark content things because i'm sure most of my readers don't want that + I'm just not into that as well. the only joke i was "called out" for once is when i used a "i want xyz character to smack their laptop on my face or tits" which i got from an andrew garfield interview where he read his thirst tweets out loud, at that time i just deleted it because it's alright.
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dottores, your mutuals, two of them to be exact, have sent me multiple of your personal blog hate posts about me and not once, have you made one where you talked about me saying an SA joke. you have only claimed that i am a cunt and that i am a gatekeeping bitch hence why i believed this must be the reason why you would suddenly hate me despite the fact we never interacted.
now, I want to address this next, this is from @dottores post which when i got it sent to me, i would've wished she just tagged me right away and said it with her chest, more so not let saetoru talk about her experience but just handle this with me.
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^ this is cat @dottores saying i got it wrong.
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^ this is why i believed she meant it just like i said it, why do you go through blogs that grow really fast's notes in the first place? where do you take the right to police other blogs like that when i'm sure your blogs aren't empty of blank blogs either. it is hard to get rid of all of them but i'm sure we all try at least, we don't need you to make us feel bad or come off as belittling, if you have found out a way to get rid of every blank blog, do enlighten us please.
+ at that time of this reblog icks?? post that saetoru added, my blog was blowing up so when a moot of mine (which was also theirs at a time) saw this, they had sent it to me.
"creators that grow really fast" and nowhere has she mentioned she only went through only her own moots notes, aside from that apologies but i still find this weird, i don't think you should invest so much time in other people's blog but this is my opinion.
this is the next thing she said:
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i don't know if dottores meant me there but i have never once harassed you nor sent you hate anywhere, again you cannot just accuse me of stuff like that when you have also never reached out to me. The things i claimed about you guys in your callout, i have text messages of the person (your moot) who sent it to me.
but back again, the only thing i did do was block dottores on tumblr and then later ao3 when i saw you in tags, which you made fun of me for later:
also i got this ask that time:
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"who blocks on ao3?" i do, ao3 is the platform i use the most so why is it funny when i use the block button? + i just like to point something out here, "they must've clicked to read and realize it was me" you can think that if you want i don't mind, but let me ask you this: i have seen you in tags hence why i was able to block you, but how did you notice i did? you can't see me in tags so surely you didnt click on my work, so you must've searched up my user for whatever reason?
and i know this is about me because she added the "this person called me chronically online" i couldn't find the post but what she was talking about is me calling other writers who reblogged that one "ick post" with not needed things such as "when writers cant characterize a character" or "when they only write headcanons", i have plenty of screenshots of that post but since i don't want to use up all my space here, i don't see why i should show their reblogs from this.
there were plenty of people like that, which reblogged horrible things there so i called everyone under that post chronically online, not just you dottores.
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yeah :) like people making fun of someone for blocking them for their own comfort. i just don't want to see you, that's all, but i have never send you hate asks nor harassed you, the only thing i did was block the blogs your own mutuals exposed to me.
next:
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^ this is after i felt bad for you after the callout.
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this is coming from your own mutuals, i have never alone claimed you guys are jealous of me nor is there anything to be jealous about. i am just a blog, this here is not being popular, no one knows who i am and i do not need to pride myself in having a big blog on tumblr.com, and my readers know that. we are all the same here.
next:
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i didn't mean you here saetoru but i understand that it sounded that way, the phrasing was a little off, for that i apologise that i made you upset with this, english is not my first language, i'm french, and when it comes to this callout post i was so fed up with it that i just posted it without looking for grammar mistakes etc. + this is about one of your friends who deleted their personal the second i announced i got their user, that was something with kaeya, when they sent me a hate ask. i won't expose it here but that person was also the one who blacklisted a friend of mine for liking itto.
i think there is a lot more but i will stop it there, this could've ended differently and i'm sad that it ended this way. I wish you all the best and i mean it, i hope we all can learn from this and move on, write on tumblr for our favorite characters because it's fun and stay away from drama. If you made it this far thank you 💓 — yoru
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soraontop · 4 months
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JUNGWON
SHIP NAME sowon
She stresses him out on the daily. She’s always sneaking around, and gets away with the most out of the entire group but he knows. He doesn’t know the specifics of things, but he knows.
He thought it was so funny when he first teased her and she didn’t know what to do. Now, it’s half and half; she’ll get flustered before gathering her bearings and going back even harder at him.
He will roast someone with her. He’s always the first to laugh at her roasts.
She’s always used to taking care of other people so when she first tried it with him, he literally refuses and somehow turns it back on her ?? She doesn't like it at all. (Or so she says)
She gets bad cute aggression with him, sometimes she just wants to squeeze his cheeks and bite him. She’s only done it once and he made fun of her so bad she vowed to never show him skinship, but, well … She can’t help it.
She always catches him staring at her, but he never turns his head away so they just continue staring at one another and doing the absolute most until one gets flustered and looks away.
HEESEUNG
SHIP NAME heesora
Number one person who never lets her do anything by herself. Always the first to ask where she’s going when she gets up. He’s the first to notice whenever she’s gone. I think he gets separation anxiety from her. Vice versa with her, even though she pretends it doesn’t bother her.
Pays the most attention to her; she never has to ask for it. She likes to make everyone think she’s good, but he was the first to notice. So he always makes sure she’s good before she can even check on anyone else.
She pretends like she hates it when he babies her or is always so attached to her, but they all know the truth.
His biggest hypewoman. Anything he does, she loves and isn’t afraid to show it. She’s literally the mom in Mean Girls with the camera. He’s always asking her for praise, and she’ll 100% give it. On the off-chance she doesn’t and wants to tease him, he acts like he’s crying or that he’s dead from the ‘pain’.
She hates disappointing him, knowing how important she is to him, so it always hurts the most because she knows she did something bad enough for him to be disappointed.
More often than not, some part of his body is touching her. If not, she knows something’s wrong.
JAY
SHIP NAME jayra
All sorts of logic goes flying out his head when he’s around her. She wants what? Oh, Jay will get it for her. *whip sound* She gets away with the most whenever she’s with Jay. He just can’t say no to her. Who would?
He’s the most logical person she knows, so she always goes to him before making big decisions.
He wants to be the best person he can be for her: the one she can always go to. Someone she will never doubt.
He always knows how to cheer her up. 99% of the time, she’s better within a minute.
Cooking buddies !!! She loves to cook and bake, so they’ll both be in charge of it. He always goes to her first for taste tests and vice versa.
They’re so in sync sometimes it’s scary. They’ll do the exact same thing at the exact same time without realizing it. She has copied most of his mannerisms/habits subconsciously. (With all of them, really, but mostly him)
JAKE
SHIP NAME jakesora / scorpioz
When these two are together … get out the way. He’s always willing to teach her new things, especially since she didn’t get the normal childhood that most people do. He’s also the one who convinces her the most to do the craziest, wildest shit ever.
He taught her to flirt, 100%. ‘Backfired’ on him though because even when she gets flustered, she always somehow says something worse than what he says to her. Double the trouble.
She always goes to him whenever she needs help with her studies, and he loves feeling wanted/needed by her.
She goes to him whenever she needs someone to just listen and understand. And he always does.
The type of besties who can’t stay quiet and are always laughing at the wrong times, especially when they need to be quiet. One look and they’re gone.
They’re always bickering it’s kind of ridiculous. She loves irritating him so she’ll purposely say the wrong thing and he’ll correct her and she’s like, “no, you’re wrong” and they go back and forth like “no” “yes” until another member yells at them to shut up.
SUNGHOON
SHIP NAME sorahoon
She genuinely thought he disliked her when they met, and was kind of turned off by it and so she always avoided him until he confronted her out of jealousy of her paying attention to the others more than him. 💀
She’s the one that talks a lot, about the most random shit she can think of, and he’s just there, listening. Doesn’t bother to speak up, but she knows he’s listening.
He teases the crap out of her, always bringing up moments she wishes to never think of again.
Both act like they’re not bothered whenever the other isn’t paying attention to them, but they get so pouty it’s funny that the members always take their attention away just to see their reaction.
He loves to make her work for whatever she wants, even when he knows he’s going to do whatever she wants anyway. He just likes watching her beg.
She would always catch him silently watching her, especially in I-LAND. He’d immediately look away, pretending like he wasn’t. She’d continue to watch him, and a second later, he’d glance back only to make eye contact. She thought his head would detach from how quickly he turned his head away.
SUNOO
SHIP NAME sunora / 03z / fatez
They literally think they’re soulmates. There is a picture of her in elementary school on a field trip to the zoo, and Sunoo is in the back of the picture, facing the camera and photo bombing her with a peace sign. It’s literally fate.
Constantly flaunts that he’s her first pick in games and well … anything. Such a smug shit.
Probably the only one who lets her take care of him without complaining.
She’s always fawning over him— she’s not shy to express her admiration over him and neither is he. He is the one she does the most skinship with, even when she “doesn’t like it.”
He’s the one who always gets her into doing TikToks with him, even if she says she doesn’t like being on social media personally. (A lie)
He is the one who brings out the best in her. She seriously doesn’t know what she’d do without him and doesn’t want to know.
She doesn’t like taking selcas, and will normally only post on social media when she’s told to — and if not, she will only willingly do it if Sunoo’s in the picture/taking it/suggested it.
NI-KI
SHIP NAME rikora
He doesn’t really see her as an older sister figure/role model. He knows she’s always been treated like that and never wants to put that kind of pressure on her again. He’s always reminding her that she’s not even a year older than him, and that it’s okay to be young and childish, too.
When she can’t reach anything, she tries to find anyone but him because he’s the most annoying about it.
He’s always calling her out on her bullshit whenever she tells little white lies on camera or even to the members. He never lets her get away with anything, she swears he’s a menace.
She’s also his biggest hypewoman. She’s seriously in awe that he’s so good at what he does and he’s only eighteen.
They like to spend holidays together when the others are at home, since both of their families aren’t in South Korea and neither can go to them unless it’s a special occasion and they happen to not have any schedules whatsoever.
He’s the only member that really calls her noona, Jungwon doesn’t because she prefers him not to since they’re only really a few months apart. Whenever he wants something, he’ll always go in a sweet voice, “Noona~”
poly ot7 enhypen fic with female 8th member, don’t like don’t read !!!
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welcometothejianghu · 4 months
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Welcome to another round of W2 Tells You What You Should See, where W2 (me) tries to sell you (you) on something you should be watching. Today's choice: 少年歌行/The Blood of Youth
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The Blood of Youth is a 2022 live-action adaptation of the tale of a deposed, disabled, and incredibly cunty prince who's on his way back to settle the score with his asshole father, and the rag-tag band of weirdos he accumulates along the way, including Spear Girl, Bad Monk, and Fire Puppy (pictured above).
I hope you like shounen anime, because this is the most shounen anime something is allowed to be without actually being based on something running weekly in Shounen Jump. What if Nirvana in Fire were also Naruto? It would be the Blood of Youth.
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This show is an underrated gem of action-packed fun that not nearly enough people in English-speaking fandom have seen. In an attempt to correct that -- and ahead of an announced second season and prequel in progress -- I'm here with five reasons you should try it out.
1. Zero thoughts head empty
You do not have to pay an enormous amount of attention to this show to understand what's going on. The show itself does not always know what's going on. It got distracted by a shiny object over there, and now we're all gearing up to go punch the shiny object. We'll get back to the main plot when we're done with the punching.
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It has a million billion plot threads going on at any given moment. Bad guys roll in from sects you've never heard of before, using superpowers with stupid names, only to get kicked into next week. There's approximately eleventy thousand characters -- so many, in fact, that I ran into problems several times while making this rec post, because there aren't readily available photos of everyone I want to talk about. Just look at the DramaWiki cast list. See how it goes on for like fifty screens? That's a little what the show feels like.
Except I'm not saying that like it's a bad thing, because the show knows it's doing this, and it acts accordingly. It telegraphs pretty well who's important and who isn't (and then it goes out of its way to color-code the latter, which is handy). What you're left with is absolutely a manga-style plot, complete with training arcs and semi-relevant sidequests, all working up to the final boss match.
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It is an extremely self-aware show. On multiple occasions, something would happen, I would crack a joke about it, and then a beat later the show itself would make the exact same joke. I wouldn't call it an outright comedy, but it's still very funny, and on purpose. It has no illusions about being some kind of profound, meaningful epic. Mostly it's just here for a good time.
Yet this lightheartedness is what makes the powerful emotional parts really powerful by contrast. The show is not stupid; it's just goofing around most of the time. When it knuckles down, it can be devastating. And you know what? It does wind up being profound and meaningful about some stuff. How about that.
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So yeah, if you're up for something that bops merrily right along and only occasionally rips your heart out, here you go!
2. Putting the poly in polycule
Bisexuals, rejoice! It's representin' time!
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Here you go, I made a relationship chart of about 40% of the show's potential and canonical ships. I could have included so many more, but I only had so much space on the image, so I had to leave out some amazing ones, like the sword hedgehog who's real into this one cougar who could easily wipe the floor with him, or the rich nerd who thinks he has a chance with the aforementioned hot butch, or the fancy MILF who cheated on the emperor with a dreamy jianghu man and is trying not to cheat on him again with a different, slightly less dreamy jianghu man. See? There's just so much.
I would also say these are not exclusive ships. They are extremely inclusive ships. I am a fan of most (though admittedly not all) of the pairings listed here, and in fact of many of the three-and-more-somes indicated by these lines. They're such a cuddle puddle of shared intense feelings that it's hard to imagine anyone getting more than mildly jealous. Moreover, the potential for romance does not get in the way of hetero friendships; a boy and a girl who are each dating other people can go do adventures together, and (mostly) nobody gets weird about it, which is nice. If anything, what makes the overall dynamic so polycule-like is how equally friends and love interests get treated, meaning that it's not difficult to see a lot of crossover potential between those two categories.
If you're like me, you're hesitant about canonical romance, especially when it's straight, mostly because so many straight love stories wind up being tiresome, gross, and/or skull-poundingly boring. You will then be pleasantly surprised by how the canon pairings with members of the main cast are not like this at all!
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Xiao Se and Sikong Qianluo are the main textual romance, and golly gee, they're just cute as heck. As the chart above indicates, I like interpreting them as two Kinsey 6's who have found their single exceptions, Mulder-and-Scully-style. Maybe one of the best things about their relationship is that it gets sidelined all the time for the plot. They're not so busy being in love that they forget to get shit done. Then they get a bit of downtime and get to go on a date, and you're like, aww, those sweet gay disaster babies are gonna do a little bit of heterosexuality. Just precious.
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Tang Lian and Fairy Rui are right up there with the cuteness. She's a sex-positive dancing beauty who wants to ride that pretty boy like she stole him, and he's a shy sword boy so tightly bottled up that he'll explode if he sees a bare ankle. Avoiding spoilers, I will simply say that this is a pairing of two relatively soft people, until a bad thing happens to one of them and the other hardens up about it. If that's your jam, they're here for you.
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Lei Wujie and Ye Ruoye are probably the most magical and the most practical of the bunch. They have a beautiful, super-dreamy, really horny sword-dance meet-cute, complete with its own pop song ... and then that's it, they're basically just together. She likes him, he likes her, good for them. In-laws aside, it's a refreshingly low-drama situation. Besides, I always love it when the hypercompetent woman gets the sweet, devoted himbo who'd do anything for her. Ruoye's had a hard life, and she deserves someone who can dick her down good at night and make her a nourishing breakfast the next morning.
And then there is, of course, The Ship:
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Xiao Se and Wuxin are canonical, textual soulmates. The show treats their dynamic as more important than any other. It's so important, in fact, that the show has to sideline Wuxin for huge parts of the drama, lest everything get too damn gay. They each get a boyfriend catch on the other. They both do fairly reckless things when the other is in trouble. They are the secret hidden happy ending to the series. They share the kind of ride-or-die relationship built on mutually being the hugest bitches in any given room. Whether or not you think this is romance, it is extremely romantic, and the series agrees as much as it can, all things considered.
And if none of those flavors of love float your boat? Well, have you considered ... eunuchs?
3. She likes e4e
So I'm on record as being real into eunuch characters, right? Well, if you're with me on that, you are in for a treat here, because these are some absolutely buck-wild eunuchs.
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There's five main ones, and I can't even begin to scratch the surface of what's going there. Like, really, I don't even think I understood all of what was happening with them. They're kind of the bad guys, but then they're kind of the good guys, but then some of them are the bad guys, but then they're just working for the bad guys, but then they screw over the bad guys, and ... it's just a lot, okay? It's a lot, and it's all happening with this bunch of catty bitches.
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Also, you would not believe the difficult time I had finding any images for this section. I guess for some reason, fandom isn't way into a bunch of canonically dickless color-coordinated middle-aged men in weird hats? Whatever, man, they are missing out. If, however, you have the good sense to be into the intense and complicated (semi-romantic??) relationships among colleagues who also professionally just happen to be missing their external genitalia, buddy, strap in (and maybe strap on, depending).
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Don't let me oversell how much these guys are in the show. They're not. They're vaguely important at points throughout, and they become incredibly important near the end, but they're hardly main characters. They're mostly back at the palace, doing their various schemes and looking absolutely fantastic.
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So if they're such a minor part of the story, why do they get their own selling point? Well, I think their presence is a good example of two specific things about the show:
Specific thing the first: It's so queer -- not gay, but queer. Thinking back to my last selling point, you will notice how many of those straight pairings may look normie on the outside, but once you get down to it are not playing by cishet rules. (For instance, I've seen a lot of people read Tang Lian's resistance to sexual advances as asexuality, which, sure!) Likewise, there are lots of incredibly important, intimate relationships that don't conform to standard romantic pair dynamics. Add to that a lot of bodies with unusual characteristics and conditions, and you've got the makings of plenty of delightful non-normative love stories.
Specific thing the second: There are so many things going on with so many side characters that there's a kink here for everyone. Don't care for eunuchs? How about slinky villains with mind-control powers? Devoted servants who would do anything for their masters? Former bad guys who owe life-debts to the good guys who saved them? Bonded pairs traipsing around the jianghu together? Sons nursing legitimate grudges against the men who killed their fathers? Alcoholic widowers with incredibly slutty necklines? Mysterious cross-dressers with unconvincing moustaches? Vengeful brides? Martial siblings? Murderous royals? Guilt-ridden half-siblings? Boring star-crossed lovers? All these and more! It's a smorgasbord of rarepair fuel!
Also, I just love these toxic drama queens. It's like if RuPaul's Drag Race had the authority to have you executed.
4. The most intriguing outfits I've ever seen in anything (and yes, I'm including Winter Begonia)
Time for a fashion show!
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The asymmetrical fits, the detailed embroidery on everything, the brilliant colors -- everybody just looks so good. And yet everything still looks ... eh, I don't know if "practical" is the word I want, but at least wearable. Nobody's dragging ten-foot trains of fabric behind them or wrapped in eighty floofy layers of gauze (except Rui, but she's special). Their outfits are strange and elaborate, but they don't defy physics.
What's truly stunning is how often they get new outfits. Xiao Se alone changes clothes about once every other episode, and more if he's getting a flashback. He is the fashion plate of the whole series, and every look he serves is pitch-perfect.
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They're not outright color-coded, but the main characters do have certain colors associated with them -- which is extra-fun when you watch those colors bleeding into their friends' clothes as their relationships get stronger. I also think -- and I'm willing to be proven wrong on this point, but I think I'm right -- that they recycle some characters' outfits into parts of other characters' outfits. On more than one occasion, I'd swear that Lei Wujie shows up wearing the left half of something Xiao Se was wearing a few episodes back (tailored to fit him, of course, because that dumb ponytail boy is tall).
Where I think the costume design gets massive points, though, is that the costumes are themselves adaptations.
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Before the live-action series, there was a 2018 3D animated donghua. I have never watched the latter, but apparently the drama is intensely faithful to the animated visuals, to the point where some fights are shot-for-shot remakes.
Of course, you can do a lot more with unreal clothing and bodies in animation -- and you can show a lot more skin, at least according to Chinese content laws. The live-action costumers chose to preserve about as many of the appearance beats from the donghua as they could manage, while still accepting the limitations of real-life bodies and materials. You can see some side-by-side comparisons here. The live-action outfits manage to be instantly recognizable without being slavishly devoted recreating to their inspirations.
So if you're sick and tired of dreary, ill-lit shows with bland palettes, this vibrant, colorful drama may be just the thing for you. It's a rainbow from start to finish.
5. Actually a good central plot?
Despite all the wacky delightful shounen nonsense that this show has -- and it has a lot -- the core of the whole narrative, which is Xiao Se's story, is surprisingly great and cohesive.
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The short version is this: Xiao Se used to be Xiao Chuhe, sixth prince and somewhat heir apparent. Then he and his jerk-ass dad had a falling-out that resulted in the prince's having his martial arts abilities all but taken from him. He's been living the life of a very well-dressed innkeeper for several years, trying to avoid all of that palace garbage. But now his jerk-ass dad is dying, which means that a lot of horrible decisions are finally having unfortunate consequences for everyone, and Xiao Se's got to get back in there to make sure everything does not go to shit and land someone terrible on the throne -- even if it has to mean taking it himself.
His central conflict is between what he used to be and what he's become. Does he miss being Xiao Chuhe, high-ranked martial artist and future emperor? Or is he happier being Xiao Se, long-suffering nobody who can barely run a business, much less hold his own in a fight? What would he be willing to do to get back what he's lost? What are his obligations to himself versus his obligations to everyone else? How much is he responsible for his father's bullshit? And why has he wound up having to babysit this stupid Fire Puppy?
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It's okay, they're best friends now. Lei Wujie decided.
No spoilers, but I liked Xiao Se's ending a lot. I feel it's very true to the character and shows a real understanding of who he is and what he values. And really, at the end of the day, sometimes all you need for a happy ending is your girlfriend, your girlfriend's girlfriend, your girlfriend's girlfriend's boyfriend who's also your boyfriend, your other boyfriend, his girlfriend, and your long-distance for-real soulmate.
Feel like giving the youths a try?
You can find them on YouTube or on Viki. But be absolutely sure that no matter where you watch it, you make sure to go watch the epilogue as well. (And if you get real into the story, well, here's a link to information about all the other adaptations.)
You are also welcome for how I did not spend this post going off for five hundred years on how much I love Wuxin and his funky relationship to Buddhism. I figured that's way too niche of a selling point for most people, and might indeed have even been counterproductive. But know that I could have.
Also, I'm very happy about the announcement of a second season, because that's going to mean Liu Xueyi has to shave his head again, and he looks unbearably good with a shaved head.
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Oh yeah, did I forget to mention the whole motorcycle photoshoot?
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In case you hadn't noticed, the whole cast is stupidly hot. Hachi machi.
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Hi! It's me again :) btw can I be your -💀anon?
You don't have to put a tag or anything but it's just so when I send asks you know it's me (^-^)/
Btw loved the headcanons you made
Could you please do some but this time it's a bit silly like I have this plot in mind :
Skele walks on s/o cutting their hair but with kitchen scissors and then like making it better with a derma shaver (I saw a video on tiktok of someone doing that and it just was funny to me lol)
What would the skele do and think? It'd be funny if some if them are a bit confused since they don't have hair
Again no worries if you don't take the ask ! Have a good day/night and be safe :)
of course you can be 💀 <3
(imma just do the skelebros from the last req bc i love them)
(also the amount of times ive wanted to do the exact same thing)
UnderTale, UnderFell, and UnderSwap skelebros walk in on their s/o cutting their hair
UnderTale:
Sans:
-"whatcha doin', y/n?"
-you look at him through the mirror while you continue cutting your hair.
-"oh, nothing! just wanted a little bit of a change. by the way, could you make sure im getting it even in the back?"
-he does.
-other than that, he just... watches.
-not creepily, or whatever.
-he's kind of quiet the whole time.
-when you finish, you do a little twirl to show your haircut
-"good job, kiddo"
-goes to take a nap
-as long as you're happy, he's okay.
Papyrus:
-"human! what is it you are-" his jaw dropped.
-literally. it fell on the floor.
"ARE THOSE MY SCISSORS??"
-that was his biggest concern. was having to wash the scissors. he uses those to cook! he needs them clean!!
-he gives you the silent treatment after
-for about 20 minutes. what can he say? he missed you!
UnderFell:
Red:
-he was just walking by the bathroom and looked caught a glance of you, scissors in hand, hair in clumps on the floor.
-he thinks it's a fighting thing. to keep monsters from being able to pull it.
-kind of surprised when you said that no, you just thought it'd be fun.
-he's weirded out, kind of. he thought you liked your hair?
-but oh well. as long as he doesn't have to be the one cleaning up the bathroom.
Edge:
-he definitely has the strongest reaction of all of the skelebros.
-he LOVES your hair.
-when you said you just felt like cutting it, he STORMED out of the house.
-he went through extreme grief.
-he didn't tall to you much for the next week or so.
-least supportive, most dramatic. that's for sure.
UnderSwap:
Blue:
-he is SO excited.
-he thinks you'll look great!
-asks if he can help you
-wonders if you'll dye it, too? blue! it'a his favorite color, to go with his favorite human.
-the exact opposite of SOMEONE *cough cough* Edge
-he is the MOST supportive
Honey:
-"hey, y/n, have you seen- oh!"
-it's certainly a surprise, but a welcome one, indeed.
-hangs around in there, just watching what you're doing.
-how are you so good? have you done this before?
-he thinks you look pretty damn good, though
sorry some of these are short ;-;
also idk if you meant just trimming? like i started writing these thinking 'oh! anon meant like long hair and going short! great!' because that's where it is from my (long haired) perspective. if that isn't what you meant i'd be happy to rewrite them x
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lowkeyrobin · 1 month
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Curious about MCYT with a partner that's usually calm and collected, suddenly being super angry at someone bothering them, maybe almost fighting the person brothering them? (Btw i really love your writing, it's super fun to read!!)
ooooo okay !! I see the vision, hopefully I pulled it off LMAO ; also thank you so much!! that means so much to me, I feel like my writings really corny and dumb sometimes and too boring so thank you, it means a lot to me 🫶🫶🫶
MCYT ; fire in the twilight
includes ; tommyinnit, tubbo, ranboo, badlinu, nihachu, & quackity
warnings ; language, talk about SA/perverts/men being weird
masterlist
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TOMMYINNIT
you're a very calm person
but when you get mad you get maddddd
he's surprised you haven't beaten the shit out of him yet
someone was being kinda weird at a meet and greet at vidcon and you were already stressed and overstimulated from taking pictures with everyone and signing merch and youtooz (guys should I try buying the slimecicle plushie? I don't wanna support a bad company but he's so cute :()
someone took a picture of you stretching where your shirt lifted a bit and showed off your midsection
Tommy saw and immediately called them out while you were taking a solo pic w a fan
when you heard him you just froze and nearly yelled
"Hey, please delete that. out of your trash too, seriously"
"Dude, fucking delete that shit. that's not okay, actually."
you end up nearly beating the shit out of the person....
then comes the Twitch apology 😭😭
you nearly went into a spiral explaining that it's never okay to take photos of ppl without them knowing, no matter when or where
he feels really bad for you but you're able to sit down and calm down to your usual self 🫶🫶🫶
TUBBO
you got really heated while you got matched up with a bigot random on valorant
you were playing with Tommy and Tubbo on squads
this mf set you OFF
they were talking some homophobic, transphobic, racist ass shit and you just lost it
you were READY for this bitch bro
Tommy and tubbo just sat back in silence because they knew you were gonna go off
"one, why do you trust your fuckass government so much?? two, your statements are completely wrong, it takes one google search. three, you're a bitch edge lord, four, no, I don't think I'm cool because I'm a streamer with a platform. five, you're completely wrong about gay people in general, you're doing the exact same thing being a Bible thumper right now. six, shut up! who fucking cares? how much of a loser do you have to be to hate people so much?"
the random just left out of embarrassment and you have to sit afk for a moment and catch your breath
"You okay, y/n?" tubbo asks
dude them and all your chats are worried about you bro
"yeah, sorry. that just... fuck, like, how are people so hateful?"
he reposts a clip of it on tik tok afterward LMAO
genuinley thanks you a little while after you properly calm down because it would've gotten bad if you didn't go off
gives you a little hug and stuff
"thanks for being my little guard dog"
RANBOO
you were getting fed up with how people were treating you and them online and just kinda lost it on stream
your chat was filled with assholes wondering where people were and why you hadn't publicly talked to them in over 12 hours and what your plans with everything were etc etc
"Dude, please stop. all of you. for weeks this has been going on, stop putting me and ranboo on these pedestals and expecting shit from us. seriously, it's horrible for both of us and our health. if you wanna see Tubbo or Tommy, go watch them! they're both live right now. Seriously, it's not funny and it's not gonna make us pump out more content and do what you want. we're people too, we get sad and burned out and tired. eventually content creation gets unfun and you won't get what you want. behave yourselves and do better. we don't owe you anything"
ranboo literally tears up a bit because he was watching the stream in the other room and could hear you, and you were visibly tearing up
you could feel your hands shaking and you just kind of ended the stream because you were so worked up and didn't wanna do it anymore
he immediately wrapped you in a hug because you were just so angry
gave you a pillow to punch and left you be for a while
you're usually very calm but your emotions exploded when you were bottling it up too much
they understood that but their heart bled for you after that, especially w all the hate that came from it :/
FREDDIE BADLINU
people were throwing things at you on stage during Tommy's live show
you played it off as jokes and were fine with jt because they were doing it sneakily in a fun way, roses, kandi bracelets, plushies etc, until someone threw their bra at you
"Okay, can we not?" You scrunch your eyebrows, looking into the crowd as you throw the bra back into the crowd. "That's fucked, don't ever do that again, learn event etiquette. never throw your bras on a fucking stage, it's weird and disgusting"
Freddie looks over at you, standing next to Tommy, giving you a "Holy shit are you okay?" look while also looking for the culprit trying to get their bra back
Tommy instantly stopped the show to reprimand the person
meanwhile Freddie was whispering to you to make sure you were okay
you were pissed but put your big kid pants on and continued the show
you apologized on Twitter after the show because you were really loud and kind of humiliated the people but you were justified with the situation
the people (and the girl who owned the bra) apologized and the situation was over
Freddie feels so bad bc you're so calm and laid back but ppl always have to test your limits :(
NIKI NIHACHU
people were filming you two out in public and taking pictures and you kinda lost it that they weren't listening to niki, telling them to kindly stop
"can you stop taking pictures? she's uncomfortable, please stop." you speak in a stern voice
the fans just like stare at you in shock because you're usually very calm and chill and you basically yelled at them (you reprimanded them because one it's the law two you both didn't want to be disturbed on your walk)
you're in a miserable mood the whole way home because yk how twitters gonna act when they see that
you quickly make a statement before any video leaks or anything, addressing the situation and apologizing to the strangers
ppl got ur back tho and showed support considering they were filming you on a nice walk without consent
she feels so bad seeing you get upset about it and feels like it's her fault
lots of reassuring her that it's never her fault and you're always happy to defend her and you don't mind getting a little loud to defend her
ALEX QUACKITY
you got really upset with someone harassing a bunch of creators during the qsmp Brazil meetup
"Dude, leave them alone. they don't want to take a picture with you and they don't owe you anything! you're being creepy to all those women right now, do you not realize that or something?"
you were furious seeing that many on your friends, even while on a trip, couldn't just not be harassed by men
the weirdo scurried off but you were literally this close to fighting the fucker
you were seething dude, like, shaking because you were so astonished someone could actually be that pushy and that much of a dick over a picture
Alex wrapped you in a tight hug and just squeezed you until you calmed down while the poor people who were harassed had reassured you that they were okay and that they appreciated and thanked you for standing up for them
Alex genuinley apologizes because the way you reacted just proved to him that you definitely are calm and laid back but when you got angry, you got angry
he feels so bad because you had to stand up for your friends and watch them be harassed and shit
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creapysummer · 1 year
Text
Things I loved about Some Theater Company's production of Ride the Cyclone
-i didn't have super high hopes because it was at this tiny community theater in the middle of nowhere but OH MY GOD IT WAS INCREDIBLE
-the cast came around and told everyone that there was going to be a loud noise at the end so that no one would be too shocked which i thought was very considerate
-before the show started the cast (minus jane) was kind of milling about in character and it was so much fun to watch
-mischa was just on his phone the entire time and at one point before it started noel tried to take it from him and mischa flipped him off
-ocean was dragging constance to see a bunch of posters
-like literally dragging
-mischa and ricky were kind of like bro-ing together it was funny
-ocean and noel were standing in like the exact same stance while bickering with eachother it was so funny
-V I R G I L
-karnak was really cool and funny
-uranium suit was so good omg i got chills at the build yourself a funeral pyre part
-when karnak showed them the other side they all RAN for it
-noel was physically restraining ocean to get her not to go through
-talia was playing in the background during mischa's catchphrase
-i might be wrong but i'm pretty sure when karnak first started controlling them that mischa tried to fight against it
-when jane showed up was just sdjsjms
-jane looked kind of like a ragdoll but had more the posture and mannerisms of a porcelain doll it was really cool
-during her catchphrase she literally had constance in a chokehold and was just kind of like petting her head
-constance started crying
-ricky almost tried to comfort jane after her introduction
-all the girls had bows around their necks and ocean and constance's were black but jane's was red
-"ohmigosh ricky you can speak!!" "that's NOTHING watch this." *little tiny jump*
-mischa was so happy for ricky when he started talking
-"HOW CAN SHE HAVE SPEECH FOR THIS⁉️⁉️" like bro was furious
-during oceans monolog literally no one was paying attention
-like the entire choir (minus jane) just went to the back of the stage and started playing rock paper scissors
-mischa called ocean a bitch in the middle of her speech
-at the end of her speech the choir faked clapped for her and when karnak said she was conceding they started full on applauding
-AAAA WHAT THE WORLD NEEDS
-the cast came out into the audience sometimes
-virgil and karnak were both chilling in the box together (electricity is real😍)
-ocean needed constance's help to get down from the human pyramid
-when karnak revealed that it was a group vote everyone sort of looked away kind of sympathetic and ocean realized she wouldn't win except for noel he looked right at her and started grinning
-it was my cousins BORTHDAY
-jane was literally constantly trying to hug constance
-"noel i love you!!" and he BOLTED like he tried with all his might to run away from her
-ricky quite literally did not have an attention span bro was always staring off into space and paying no attention to anything
-during the nativity scene noel used his tie to mime hanging himself and then constance grabbed him by the tie and YANKED him forward
-"OR we can just go to the manger JOSEPH😡"
-noel tried yet again to take mischa's phone because he wasn't listening to his monolog
-the monique dress was so pretty omg
-and instead of typical heels she had these kick ass heeled boots
-constance and ocean started slow dancing in noels lament
-when noel and mischa started making out the entire audience started cheering it was so funny
-"that was dope yooo!! 😃😃"
-ocean was so annoyed with noel
-ricky was SO engaged with the improve scenario
-he got very excited when constance brought up doing and/or dealing recreational drugs
-mischa called ocean a bitch several more times. both in ukrainian and english
-he was also like constantly flipping people off
-mischa was trying not to cry when karnak told his past☹️
-collective cheering from the audience when mischa took his shirt off
-talia was so beautifully done omg
-i'm pretty sure that there was also a complete separate actress for talia (who also played virgil i believe?)
-talia's dress was so beautiful
-ocean and constance danced together again
-at the end talia left and mischa ended up hugging noel (he was very confused and noel looked absolutely thrilled)
-noel tried one more time to take mischa's phone but this time he let him
-they all had a group hug instead of just noel and mischa hugging
-noel and mischa still had a one on one hug omg
-oh boy space age bachelor man
-"or i could tell you about the time i was a superhero sex god on a cat planet!!" "😨"
-horrified looks from everyone in the room
-sabm was so wonderfully weird
-oh my god the costume change.
-i don't know how i can describe it besides train conductor meets gay sparkles
-like it actually had a hat that looks like the ones train conductors wear
-also you could totally see his dick
-it reminded me of david bowie in the labyrinth
-during his speech afterwards he was like hiding his dick with the conductors hat
-when jane went "my turn!!" constance literally LEPT into mischa's arms like he was holding her bridal style for a hot second
-tbojd was so good omg it was haunting
-everyone gasped when the flying mechanism started
-the new birthday song ☹️☹️☹️
-happy birthday to hmm hmm and noel tried to finish the song before ocean shut him up
-ocean did the whole 1 2 3 thing then trial off and ricky just jumped in with "4!!"
-jane was so happy aaa
-she was soso excited about savannah with the greenest eyes
-when mischa called noel tragic they hugged again they were literally hugging all the time nischa is real
-ohh constance's monolog ☹️☹️
-this one lady kept laughing while i was trying not to sob
-sugar cloud was so amazing and happy and lovely
-the choreography was so silly
-nischa did the synchronized headbanging
-at the end constance thanked them all
-when ocean was deciding who to vote for everybody froze except for her and karnak
-aaa i almost sobbed
-it's not a game/it's just a ride was soso beautiful
-at the very end they all reached out towards the audience it was so incredible
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the-s1lly-corner · 5 months
Note
Platonic tadc cast with a child reader Who is like :
"hey, wanna see me do a cartwheel :D"
Basically very spontaneous and chaotic in the adventures lol
Ty!! (and remember to drink water) ;3
TADC cast x chaotic!kid!reader ! (Platonic)
Guys I'm literally so tired I just got done baking a ton of stuff, like I'm talking 12ish hours of non stop cooking and baking I'm going insane im trying so hard not to fall asleep rn because I kinda. Feel bad for not really answering requests today
Anywahs
Hope you enjoy anon!
Written on mobile
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CAINE:
Well well how the turn tables (writing caines portion last for once)
Very similar to kinger and ragatha in that he supports everything you do; in fact he encourages your behavior as long as no one is getting hurt. Very loudly (and sometimes obnoxiously) cheers for you
While kinger can only cheer and clap, I think Caine sets off sparkles and fireworks... probably has a whole group of bubbles cheering you on too , assuming there can be multiple bubbles at any given time (I personally think there can be, and they all share a hivemind of sorts)
So what was the occasion that prompted that?
A wonky cartwheel, of which you excited called "a sideways front flip"
(Fun fact from the admin, I called my first cartwheel that bc I didnt know it was called a cartwheel yet)
POMNI:
Anxious parental figure and hyper child, a dynamic that's hit or miss at least for me. Really it depends on how its executed
That said I think she struggles to keep up with you
Constantly scrambling around you make sure you dont fall into any danger. Literally and figuratively...
Her attempts to get you to sit down for more than five minutes fail
Your ass is failing the marshmallow test/j
RAGATHA:
No thoughts only that one clip from adventure time where BMO pretends to be a wheathervane before trying to nose dive off the roof, all while calling for finns attention. Thats you and ragatha, basically (in essence, not exact scenario though)... maybe zooble too, but we'll get there when we get there (I am currently having a brain blast)
Says things like "what am I gonna do with you" everyday, always lightheartedly of course and usually accompanied by a tired chuckle
Generally very supportive of you though, just so long as you're not hurting yourself! Sure, this is the digital world and injuries dont really stick, but still! The pain is still there
JAX:
I mentioned the marshmallow test in pomnis part and I feel like jax would do something similar with you. Except the test is rigged and the candy (which he uses in place of the marshmallow( is actually for him and not for you. So if you actually earn the extra candy you dont even get it
That said I do think jax would feel bad when you get upset about the joke
Anyways
I think he finds it funny, as long as you're not tugging on his overalls and screaming at him for something, or interfering with his plans
Hes not a neglectful rolemodel/familial figure, he just has a short fuse with the above I think, regardless of who it is, kid or not
That said he fully embraces your spontaneous nature
KINGER:
Peepaw and his grandchild, that's it that's literally the dynamic
"Kinger is only 48-"
Hush♡
"Oh that's so lovely, (reader)" when you run up to him with your hands full of god knows what
Eagerly claps and cheers when you show him a new trick you learned
Bonus if you try to recreate or one up his embellished stories in order to make him proud of you (hes always proud of you)
ZOOBLE:
As mentioned in ragathas part, the wheathervane BMO thing is basically in essence you guys' dynamic. Except where I think ragatha would be quicker to pay attention to you, zooble may be a little slower. Not because they dont care about whatever you're trying to display to them, but because I think a lot of the times they kind of mentally check out (me too honestly)
Tries to scold you if you do something too dangerous or out of line, may come across as way angrier or upset than they actually are though thanks to their voice being kinda
You know
Zooble gives off "cool older sibling who doesnt care about nothing" energy
GANGLE:
Meekly tries to get you to calm down for a few minutes, especially if theres an IHA going on because she doesnt want you to run off and potentially get hurt. Tries to keep you occupied with arts and crafts. Watches in horror as you impulsively eat the glue
Tends to wrap one of her ribbon hands around yours so she knows you're not running off.. this is more so when theres an IHA going on
As per usual not many ideas for gangle <\3
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jakecockley · 2 years
Text
- your smile, you're everything -
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✧ pairing: jake lockley x f!reader (main) , marc spector x reader , steven grant x reader
✧ summary: you're in the kitchen cooking something up for your boyfriend, jake. when you turn to look at him and he looks back at you, your heart swells. jake feels the exact same way, maybe even more.
✧ genre: fluff/soft comfort
✧ warnings: none at all, this is pure adorbs ! ♥︎ 
✧ word count: 374
✧ author's note: i'm still not over moon knight and i never will be, ok. this show is everything to me and frankly, i'm still fascinated with it. i absolutely love the moonboys and i might post drabbles of them in the future depending on how this one goes. (tagging @marc-spectorr n @slenderclaw because i love them and they share their love of oscar isaac and mk with me-) this one's short !
do i have a favorite? noooo, ofc not- (jake mi amorcito 🫠🖤)
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"You smile a lot more since we've met." You told your lover, brushing the soft, ebony curls away from the frame of his face.
Jake didn't answer you right away. As corny as it sounded to him, he was losing himself in your eyes. God, he was starting to become like Steven, when he'd stare at you like some lovesick teenager, but Jake didn't care.
He could care less at this point, especially when you looked at him the way you did, as if he was the prettiest damn thing on Earth.
"I think my magic is working," you grinned, "you have a really pretty smile, you know. Really makes my day to see you like this, baby."
Ooh, no, no, after that, he knew he didn't deserve you. If he told you that, you'd spend hours giving him a whole lecture on why you disagree with him.
His smile grew a bit more at the thought.
When you cradled his face in your hands and softly rubbed your thumbs across his cheeks, he felt weak in the knees. It was a loving and kind gesture that Jake absolutely fell for.
"Really, huh?" He chuckled.
And it was funny to him, how he came to love your touches, cuddles, and everything in between. To think how before he hated physical touch, wasn't used to it at all but, to his surprise, you were patient enough with him, and as time passed, he became addicted to the feeling of your hands on him.
He fell in love with you each passing day, like a love-drunk fool. Marc would make fun of him for it, Steven too, even while they acted the exact same way when they were around you.
They all loved you.
"Yes, really really." You leaned forward to kiss his nose, then his lips.
"Now come on, food's about to get cold," you told him before pulling away to walk to the table, which had Jake almost let out a whine.
"One more kiss, amor?"
He heard your laughter in the dining room, the sound of it making him feel all bubbly inside.
"Why don't you sit down and I'll think about it, Lockley, hm?"
He smiled.
Who was he to refuse you?
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liked this fic ? check out my current and future ones on my moon knight masterlist !!
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