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mellasart · 1 year

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so, I've been talking about this project for a while now, and I finally finished it! I'm calling this one “The Masquerade”

(also it only shows up on dark mode, I have no idea why, I’ll try to fix it though)

enjoy <3

“You’re throwing everything away, sister.”

The image still remains vivid in my mind, even all these years later, his ornate mask thrown onto the paving stones of the courtyard, his red hair swaying in the cold wind, and the knot that was threatening to form in my throat as his face searched mine for any indication that I cared.

He wasn’t able to find any. Probably due to the fact that I truly didn’t care.

“Don’t you hear me? You-” I hardly listened to his pleas, instead opting to raise my gloved hand, high into the crisp air. His brows furrowed, confusion lined the features of his young face. His eyes, so similar to my own, never strayed from mine, barely acknowledging my hand gradually coming down upon my head, resting on the cool golden crown that rested there.

“I have this, and you do not.” My voice was colder than I expected, and he felt it. I watched as his hands dropped, the hope in his eyes fading. He had given up, and I had won. I turned, feeling the layers of my dress’s delicate fabric brush against the ground. I held my head high as I left him behind for the glamorous ball happening within the castle. However, my victory soon felt bitter in my mouth, as I heard his last shred of defiance manifest into a string of words that managed to entangle my throat, catching my breath.

“They would be so disappointed with who you’ve become.”

Earlier that Night •

My reign began as strong as my parents had hoped for when they left the kingdom to me, as many seem to ignore. However, no amount of playing to the people’s wishes would have blinded them from the pain I was bound to have caused. My beloved parents were taken away far too soon, before any of us had anticipated. My father had always said I wouldn’t have to worry about taking upon the role of queen, for our kingdom, Thiouren, was safe and prosperous, and he was meant to live a long and full life. And I, a kingdom that I was prepared to rule over.

Things never seemed to go to plan. Once I was queen, I reveled in my newfound power, the glamour and magnificence that came customarily with my title. I found that my control extended farther than my imagination. All beginning with the customary ball thrown to commemorate when the throne is passed down to the next in line.

I wanted to test the boundaries of my reign. I was young and foolish, and decided that this ball would have been nothing more than a bore, and focused instead on making it into an extravagant affair. A masquerade ball. I requested to have the traditional coronation gown as well as an heirloom mask modified, they were to be made entirely of solid gold. As were the chandeliers, and candlesticks, and nearly anything else I could get my hands on. The mounds of gold stored beneath my palace slowly drained, until I was relying entirely upon what my people provided. If someone had a particularly large harvest, it went to me. If anyone found precious materials, my soldiers mined them. I sucked every bit of wealth out of my people for this ball. It required months of preparation, I hardly left the castle, I hardly even went to hear my council out. I listened not to my people’s issues or requests, as it had occupied all of my passion and thoughts. I needed to be there to make sure all of the kingdom’s time and energy was spent on this ball. There simply wasn’t time or space for anything else.

It was a lavish party. Nearly the entire kingdom made an appearance. I had never thought of myself as the type to desire the social life, but one glance at the ballroom in all its glory, filled to the brim with people in their finest wear, was a feeling that could compare to none other. The chandeliers were teeming with fresh candles, casting a golden glow upon the layers of lace and velvet that adorned those around me. The gold mines, so rich and overflowing with precious metals, couldn’t hold a candle to the shine of that room.

No one shined as much as she did, though. They never even seemed to come close.

Her skin would glow, her dark eyes glimmering with delight as I approached her. Coils of thick black hair cascaded down her back, resting perfectly upon her shoulders. The gold that adorned her collar mirrored her name, the lady Amber. A childhood friend of mine, she never seemed to look at me any differently than she did those not of my lineage. Of all the ladies of the court, she was the only one I ever truly felt close to. I took a tentative step forward, leaning down and feeling the velveteen layers of my gown reach the marble floor below. I brought my hand up to meet hers, giving it a gentle kiss.

“May I have this dance?” I smiled, despite my nerves. Her hand was warm in mine, her bejeweled rings brushed up against my shaky palm.

“Of course, your majesty.” A smirk spreads across her face, lining her features with humor. Although, I never expected myself to get accustomed to the title, almost as if I had been able to predict how it would soon be taken away from me.

The Next Morning •

The silence sat heavy that day. Many of my parent’s trusted advisors had congregated in the meeting room to speak with me. They were displeased. I sat comfortably at the head of the round table, bearing little concern towards the issues they presented to me, instead enjoying the crushed velvet throne I had ordered the castle seamstresses to construct for me. There were countless scrolls sitting atop the table, a physical manifestation of my mistakes. I turned to my brother, hoping he would be joining me in finding this whole thing a bit ridiculous, thinking we could laugh about it together.

He didn’t even meet my gaze.

There had been a large portion of my people that were angry with me, thinking that I had been disrespectful to my parents. The wealth they had accumulated had been desecrated, in their eyes. There were rumors that I cared not about upholding tradition and paying homage to the work they had done for Thiouren, and that I only wished to throw my kingdom's resources into parties and ball gowns. I would be lying if I said there wasn’t a sliver of truth in that.

Despite the council’s concern, I wasn’t worried. The people complaining that I hadn’t yet done anything to benefit the kingdom were simply asking for too much, I thought. I believed that I was to protect the kingdom if there was a large problem, and at the moment, I didn’t think there was. I stood tall, towering above the hunched figures of my council, all turning up from their scrolls and letters to watch as I made my way out of the meeting room.

The halls, usually bustling with countless figures going about their work, were empty. My footsteps echoed, bouncing off the many marble pillars that held up the castle. My pace was brisk, yet faltered the moment I glimpsed the portrait hall to my right. The ornately carved doors were left open, almost asking me to enter. The room was hauntingly empty, the silence was eerie. As I sauntered through the room, I felt the eyes of countless generations of my family watching me. One in particular caught my eye. My parents, holding my brother and I in their arms. I brought my hand to the humble frame, hearing their words vividly in my mind, remembering how often they spoke of giving to the people. I almost felt as if they could read my mind, seeing my defiance of the council. They had been so proud of the group of trusted people that they had established. Not one soul had entered the meeting room under their order that ever had any grievances with being there, simply wanting to aid their kingdom. I allowed memories of my parents to wash over me, like a fog over a harbor. Suddenly though, something broke through the haze.

A single rip in the otherwise flawless section of the painting that I was in. Right through my neck, and deep into the canvas.

That Night •

The sound of shattering glass flooded my senses. Panic rushed through my body. Any hope that I was still in a nightmare was gone the moment I heard my brother’s yells, drowned in a sea of screams. My quarters reeked of smoke, and a thick layer of debris lay heavy on my floors. I grab my hair, holding my head as I try to make sense of the situation. I brought my hands down, bringing with them several auburn hairs, it scared me how shaky and pale they were. I shook my head, trying to silence the nagging thought that began to take hold of my mind’s reins.

“This is all my fault.”

There was a fire. I heard it crackling, the wooden parts of the castle slowly becoming engulfed in flames. The image of my beloved Amber flashed into my mind, and any sense of self preservation left me as I sprinted down the halls, hearing nothing but the pounding of my heart in my ears. I burst into Amber’s quarters, hardly being able to form words to describe the sensation I was feeling. The charade had broken, the weight of the situation was crushing me. I couldn’t believe it had taken me that long to realize that I had ruined everything. All that my parents had worked for had been thrown out the window, and I had watched it fall. The embarrassment was unbearable, I had been so reckless and immature, and it may have cost me everything. Hot tears burned my cheeks, I felt my face turn ruby red. I had been an imbecile and the people my parent’s cherished were suffering as a result of it. I tried to find the words to say to Amber, but all I managed to muster was “It’s all my fault.”

Her hands caressed my face, I wrapped my arms around her. I was shaking, but as the image of flames danced in my vision, I slowly felt as my sadness and regret hardened into a tight ball in the center of my chest.

“You can fix this, I’m here for you, you know.” Amber whispered into my ear.

I shook my head. There was no remedy, no magical cure that could reverse the damage of months of reckless abandon. There were cries for my head, flames reaching out to catch me. I feared leaving the castle, but even more I feared facing my brother knowing I risked our family name for the sake of having fun. I held Amber close, as the realization that I may have to leave her dawned on me. As there was only a single solution surfacing in my mind.

I had to fake my own death.

It wouldn’t be complicated. The castle was flooded with pandemonium, I could easily weave through the corridors that I knew so well. All it would take for them to avoid searching for me is a bloody knife, seemingly dropped with reckless abandon in the woods. There were other kingdoms nearby, where I could find food and warmth until deciding what to do with myself. What would I do? Questions began to cloud my mind, and apparently my face as well, seeing as how Amber soon asked,

“What are you thinking of, my love?” Concern etched itself into her face, pulling on the strings attached to my heart. I didn’t want to tell her, since she could easily have everything she wishes if she let me leave. However something in the way her eyes bore into my own, so full of love and hope, told me she wouldn’t have it.

I told Amber my plan. Her face grew solemn, we both knew it was the only way yet it was still a difficult decision. We hastily gathered our things, I wanted to savor the moment that would likely be my last in the castle, if my plan worked. I had taken a moment to appreciate every tapestry, every ornate detail carved into the wood. From the smallest window, to my parents’ immense stained glass portraits, I took in every detail of the place I had grown up in like it was the first time I had ever been there.

As we hurried past my brother’s room, I felt a sharp pain in my heart, knowing that I would probably never see him again. Something inside of me told me it was for the good of the kingdom, and even if I stayed, it wouldn’t change anything. I would have still been dead to him. As I stood in front of his door, all of the things that I wish I could say to him ran through my head. I swallowed the lump in my throat and continued when yet another wave of pain rushed through me, as I remembered that my brother would be entirely alone. My parents have been gone for some time, and I was his only other family member. I turned to Amber, her face silently reassuring me that this must be done. I clasped her hand in mine, grateful for her presence but hoping I could have found a way to speak to my brother again.

The brisk night air felt icy on my skin as we ran through the expansive gardens separating the castle walls from the forest beyond. The sounds of destruction were in the distance now, instead the hurried breaths of Amber and I as we lugged our way through the cold. We didn’t have much time. They wanted my blood spilled, and once they made it through the towers to my quarters and realized I wasn’t in my bed, their wishes might be granted.

Once we cleared the gardens and began our journey through the forest, I started to get giddy. I had gotten close to accepting my demise, and something about the way we were running through the dirt under the pale light of the moon felt liberating, somehow. I started to smile, turning to Amber to see a matching grin plastered on her face. Our hands still entwined, we somehow managed to find our way in a world I had taken for granted.

Ten Years Later •

My eyes burst open, my hands clenched the linens of our bed. Images from my nightmares still dotted my vision. I strained to see the reality, the humble home we had made on the outskirts of a small farming village by vast forests, blocking my tainted memories of the castle from my mind. The warm air settled on my clammy skin, the sound of wind through fields echoed my silent sobs.

Amber walked over to me silently, and as the tears rolled down my cold face, she began to wrap her arms around me, holding me as I felt the waves of immense guilt from what I had done. I looked into her brown eyes and saw nothing but love and admiration in them. I couldn’t see my own, but I hoped they showed the same. I held her close, inhaling her scent of dirt and herbs. She ran her fingers through my hair and my breathing slowed, while the ache in my chest remained, perpetually weighing me down. I knew that all that transpired resulted from my irresponsibility. I could almost picture my brother, ruling over a kingdom that he had to build back up from the rubble I had left him. I knew he was able to do it. We were far from Thiouren but the faint chime of the castle bells that meant a ball was to be held there that night still reached my ears.

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