#you're NEVER gonna be able to live in a world where people will stop asking you to be a part of things that's not feasible | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

toastermoth · 4 months

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Hey I was wondering if you can do a hc of the OM Characters finding out that MC used to be a singer in the human world but in reality was unsuccessful and doesn’t like mentioning about it at all but still has passion over it. It doesn’t matter about the gender and yeah. If u can Tysm! 🤗

Obey Me! x Gn! Singer!Mc

I had so much fun writing these- tysm anon for requesting!! <3 LUKE IS LIKE YOUR LITTLE BROTHER!!! P.S. You can also read this as platonic or romantic! Lucifer: 1st Born

He finds out because you were taking too long in the shower and heard your captivating voice singing.

He would be surprised and though looking unimpressed on the outside, in the inside this man is so happy if he could he'd squeal like a little girl.

When he's alone with you he'll definitely ask you to sing for him and through small pleas you agree, and when you're done he'll be smiling his signature smile and clapping softly.

"Where did you learn to sing like that y/n?" he asks awaiting your response like a dog waiting for a command.

"Well I just liked singing! I used to be a singer in the human world but it didn't work out.."

He hears your voice break when you say those last 4 words and he is devestated.

How dare nobody appreciate your beautiful voice?!

He must've been glaring because then you said "But I still have a passion for it! They never discouraged me enough to make me quit!

That reassured him as he breathed a sigh of relief.

"Y/n, never give up your passion, and if nobody supports you just know that I will personally string them up and make them appreciate your singing."

You laughed a little and Lucifer was just happy that he was able to hear your amazing gift.

Mammon: 2nd Born (Sorry his is short-)

He finds out one day when he heard you start singing a song for a playlist you're making to study.

WAIT WHAT?!

HIS HUMAN CAN SING?! WHY IS THEIR VOICE SO AMAZING?!

"WHY'D YA NEVER TELL ME?!"

You yelp in surprise and ask what he's talking about.

"YOUR SINGING OBVIOUSLY! IT'S LIKE GRIMM FOR MY EARS!"

You make a face and after much begging by the 2nd born, you decide to tell him

"Well, nobody really liked my singing in the human world.. I tried everything but no matter what I never really got listeners or fans haha.."

This poor man is wondering WHY?! HOW?!

He looks at you with his blue-yellow eyes and cups your face.

He says "Well they're stupid because you got the most amazing voice. Hell better than the angels! And they're angles for fucks sake! Look human, what I'm trying to say, is that you shouldn't listen to anyone who talks down to ya. I'll be your number 1 fan y/n! Nobody is gonna take that spot either ya hear me?"

That reassured you as he tackled you and pulled you into a hug.

"My precious human! How dare they keep this talent from me!"

He probably made a t-shirt saying "Y/N's #1 FAN"

Leviathan: 3rd Born

He found out when you started singing the opening to an anime!

Singer mc?! LEVI.EXE:SHUT_DOWN

Once you knew that he noticed your smile dropped and stopped singing and whispered a small sorry before looking down almost looking shamefully.

"Y-y/n?! Where did you learn to sing?! H-how can you-?!"

This poor boy has so many questions which you were reluclant to answer.

He gave you the cute 'anime girl' eyes (which is what he called it) and he knew you couldn't resist them.

"Mmmm fine. I used to be a singer in the human world and I gave it my all I really did but.. I never got anybody to listen.. I enjoy singing still but only for myself.."

Oh HELL NO. Levi may be shy but he can get ANGRY.

"That's impossible! Your singing is the most amazing thing my ears have ever experienced! You're just like the mc in the anime I'm-A-Secret-Singer-In-Highschool-Living-A-Normal-Life-But-Please-Send-Help!"

The long ass title of course made you snicker but he looked at you with serious eyes and said, "Henry had people who talked down to him but he never gave up! A-and neither should you y/n!!"

Satan: 4th Born

He found out by you humming a tune to singing some of the lyrics from a song in a movie that was inspired by a book that you were looking for in the library.

He couldn't help but be frozen by your hypnotic voice. You didn't notice him until he leaned on a bookshelf and something fell.

"I'm sorry Y/n. I couldn't help but listen to your singing. Where did you learn to sing like that?"

You paused a little bit while he motions you to sit in one of the library chairs.

"Can you tell me y/n?"

You sigh knowing he wouldn't forget about it and would probably ask you about it tomorrow and decide to tell the blonde haired demon.

"Well, in the human world I was a singer and I enjoyed it, loved it actually! But people didn't really like my songs or my voice or anything so I just kinda quit.. I never lost my passion for it though."

He sits looking at you in what you can tell is a mix of anger and confusion.

"Why did you give up? People are ruthless, but I think you should try again y/n. You never know and if they don't like your singing they can suck dick."

The last part of his sentence makes you laugh a bit as he smiles and looks at you saying, "I believe in you y/n. Even when you don't believe in yourself."

Asmodeus: 5th Born

He found out you could sing when he dragged you to a karaoke bar.

"C'mon sweetie! You'll do just fine besides my voice will take the main stage and you can sing backup! We got this we'll crush every demon! And don't worry I'll let you pick the song, as long as it won't ruin my beautiful voice!"

You think he only said the last part because he saw you looked a little nervous but you were still thankful.

After the karaoke session you noticed how everyone there was looking at you and not as Asmo which was weird because he's the lust demon, then you noticed he was even looking at you with sparkles in his eyes.

He bowed to the crowd then dragged you back to the house of Lamination.

"Where did you learn to have such an enchanting voice darling?! That was amazing!! I need to bring you to there again, you'll be all the talk all over Devildom!-"

He stopped once he took a look and saw you looking at your knees in discomfort and silence.

"Sweetie.? Are you alright? Did I make you uncomfortable?" Despite popular belief he was actually very caring and kind and not always self-centered.

You nodded and said, "That was my first crowd in a long time.."

Confused, the pink haired demon asked "Well what do you mean sweetheart?"

So you explained it to him.

"Well, I used to be a singer in the human world but, it didn't really work out and I never really had a crowd that enjoyed my singing but maybe they didn't even enjoy it as much as I do.."

"Y/n. I know demons, and I know just by their faces that they loved our performance. Your performance! Don't be so hard on yourself, because I know that you did amazing and I'm perfect so obviously I'm right!" He said swishing his hair in an attempt to make you smile. (It did)

"There's that smile I adore! Let's get your confidence back and go to more karaoke bars okay? Next time you better sing a duet with me though!"

Beelzebub: 6th Born

How he found out was one time you were baking with Luke and Barbatos (and Beel decided to bring himself to 'taste test.') and a familiar tune came from Barbatos's voice from him humming then Luke joined in singing and eventually you joined in on the fun.

Soon the kitchen was soon made into a ballroom with you singing and dancing with Luke and Barbatos stil humming the music as Beel watches in total awe.

You're a little worn out from singing and dancing till you see the tall orange haired demon looking at you as if you were the most prized food in all of Devildom.

"Y/n your voice is amazing!"

"Ah.. you really think so Beel?"

He nods his head as Barbatos and Luke agrees.

"Well, let's just get back to this cake yeah?" The three boys wondered why you were so dismissive but Barbatos and Luke paid no attention and they continued working. Beel however did not forget about your captivating voice.

On the way back to the house of Lamination he asks, "So you don't need to answer, but why did you just shut down the idea of singing? I really like your voice and I think so does Luke and Barbatos."

"Well it's not somthing I really talk ab-" theres the Beel puppy eyes. Damn you Beel for being adorable.

"Okay.. I used to sing in the human world, and I really loved it so I tried to become a professional but nobody.. really liked my singing as much as I do.. so I kinda gave up on that profession."

This poor boy was shocked.

"But why? Just because some people don't like it doesn't mean you shouldn't. Your voice is very nice to listen to especially when singing. Even if you don't like it I do and so does Luke and Barbatos and everyone who didn't support your singing is stupid."

You smiled knowing at least somebody liked your singing at least one person.

"If you start singing let me know, I want to hear your voice again singing."

Belphegor: 7th Born

How he found out was when he called you up for a nap and said he needed a lullaby.

"Y/nnnn I need something to make me fall asleep I can't fall asleep without oneee.." Which was halfway the truth. After much begging on the behalf of Belphie, you gave in and started singing a small lullaby.

Once you were done singing and started humming Belphie sleepily commented, "Such a mystical voice.. how not famous lullaby singer..."

You laughed a tiny bit to yourself for how sleepy he is and turned to him seeing even though sleepy he was dead serious.

"How are you not famous.?" he asks.

You hesitate to meet him in the eye as he lays close by you, knowing him he'd keep himself awake until you told him or he would lay on you until you told him.

Sighing, you say, "I tried to be famous, to sing as a real singer. But people just, didn't really listen and I was unsuccessful.."

You notice a hand lay you down and the fluffy blue haired demon says, "Well they lost out on a good singer.. that means you're now my professional lullaby singer.. screw the money grabbing producers who can't tell talent."

You smile at him being this caring and start singing another lullaby to lull him to slumber as well as yourself.

"You're the greatest singer and make sure you believe that too.."

OKAY HI THAT TOOK A LONG TIME AND I SORTA GOT LAZY AT THE END- BUT TELL ME IF YOU WANT ME TO DO A PART @ WITH BARBATOS, DIAVOLO, SIMEON, AND SOLOMON!! (AND LITTLE BROTHER LUKE!!!)

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babybluebex · 1 month

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my latest dom “fantasy,” whatever you wanna call it, has been ur the actor who plays niece elise in the holdovers and you two like each other when filming but since your part is small you don’t see each other till a streaming of the movie when you reconnect. 🤗

oh my god stop the presses this is CUTE

you're kinda joking together and laughing inbetween takes, but you're both nervous because you have to kiss and neither of you have ever done that before (kissed other people, yes, but on screen, for the whole world to see, never) but dom's a sweetheart and you do the scene and it goes off without a hitch, and you're maybe a little disappointed when alexander payne says they got the shot they needed and that you don't need to do it again

and like yeah, you're only on set for like 1 day, and you managed to follow dom on instagram but like sorta forgot about him inbetween filming and release time?? like you both got busy and just, whatever, but then the movie comes out and at first seems like it's just gonna be any other movie, you still post pictures from set on your instagram and celebrate it, and, for the first time since meeting him, dom comments on your post "so much fun, if you're ever around my way, text me" and you're like ⁉️

and you shoot off a dm at him, sorta like "hey i was finally able to watch the whole movie and you did really good" and he texts back like "aw thanks, that's really sweet" and you ask "back then, you lived in massachusetts, where are you now?" and he says "i'm in philly right now for school, but i'm taking spring semester off, so i'll probably go back to jersey with my mom"

and you start talking like every day then, now that the door is open you can't stop, he's always sending you memes and telling stories, and you send him memes about HIM as you watch him become the new it boy (and maybe you're a little jealous bc he was YOUR boy first, he was YOUR little secret, but not so much anymore), and THEN the movie starts to get acclaim?? and it looks like it might be something more than some movie you made a few years ago for a single day?? it's turning into something bigger than that?? all your friends at uni knew that you were in the movie and had gone and seen it and teased you about the kiss, but now you're getting stopped by strangers on the way to lecture and asked about the movie?? like wtf!!

and you and dom are steady texting every day like "DUDE" "DUDE I KNOW", and it starts getting awards buzz, all the best actor and best supporting actress and breakthrough actor and everything is WILD, and you're always texting him to congratulate him winning this award or that award, and you slowly start to realize. oh shit i have a crush on him. oh fuck i'm whipped for this guy.

and the day the oscars nominees are announced, you're in lecture, and your phone starts ringing and yelling at you, and your lecturer is like "do you need to take that?" and you sorta laugh "no, whatever it is, it can wait..." and you finally dig your phone out of your bag and see it's dom wanting to video call?? which doesn't happen often, for as famous of an actor as he is now, he hates seeing himself on camera and even if you do video call, his camera is off most the time, so for HIM to initiate a video call is VERY bizarre "... actually, sir, i do need to take this, i'm sorry"

and you go in the hall and answer the call, and dom is yknow DOM, messy frizzy hair and his shirt on backwards and he's frantic, and you're like "did you just wake up, what's going on??" and he says "have you seen yet?!" "seen what??" "jesus christ, i can't fucking believe this—" "dominic, what's going on?" "holdovers has been nominated for best picture at the oscars"

and you black out for a second and snap back in and you're like "we're WHAT"

and dom says "what're you doing on march 10th?? can you come to the oscars?? do you even want to??" "yeah i'd love to, but i-i need to get to LA, and i need a dress, and i need a date—" "how about me? i'll take you"

and when you reunite in los angeles for the oscars, it's the first time you've seen him in the flesh in like nearly 2 years, but you run to him and hug him, and he hugs you back, and it's such a happy moment and you can't believe that this is your life

and all night, people are complimenting your dress and your hair and makeup, and dom won't stop trying to get people to pay attention to you, he's in a little interview on the carpet and he's asked who his date is, and he grabs you by the hips "my wonderful costar, she played elise in the movie" and everybody has the same reaction, they hear your character's name and then stare at you for a second until it clicks "oh! you did so good in the movie!!"

and dom is so nervous and anxious all night, he sorta joked "i know we won't win, there's no shot in hell, oppenheimer's gonna win, so why am i nervous??" and you hold his shaking hands in yours and try to calm him as much as possible, but cameras catch you holding hands and the way he whispers in your ear to talk to you, and like HALFWAY through the show, your friends sends you a link to a variety article that mentions the best dressed at the awards, and dom is on there, and the little text blurb under his picture says "sessa is attending the show with his girlfriend and costar" and your friend is like "GIRLFRIEND??" and you're like "wait" and apparently everybody online has mistaken your physical closeness for a relationship, and you show dom during a commercial break just to be like "oh haha look at this, they think we're dating"

and he hits you with the "are we not?" "what do you mean 'are we not'?" "i mean, i thought... i thought we've been dating for a while. i've been telling people all night that you're my girl" and you shiver with delight at how casually he says his girl, but like "you thought... well, when would we have started dating?" "you remember a few months ago, the conversation we had about how, like, i'm bad at relationships and you don't like commitment, and i said i'd try to be better and you said you'd try to commit to someone? i thought that was us agreeing to start dating"

and like shit yeah you DO remember that conversation, it was like 3am and you were on facetime for HOURS that night and you're like "oh! well... yeah, that can be it." and dom's like "sooo.... does that mean i can kiss you?" and it's a gentle, soft kiss, just like your first one so long ago

and that night, you reunite with paul and da'vine (who you had met in passing on set), and towards the end of the night, da'vine sends you a photo she took on her phone of you and dom, holding each other, foreheads touching, giggling together, and you hard launch your shit on instagram with that picture "we may not have won best picture, but i won best boyfriend <3"

#bex answers #anon ask #dominic sessa x reader #i got carried away lmao

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wayfayrr · 9 months

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just got home from work lol - a dq worker. i had an idea of Time reacting to someone who worked as a fast food worker, specifically dairy queen cause of the potential for a funny interaction: "oh yeah i worked for Dairy Queen™" "you worked for lon lon ranch?"

"no there is literally a company named Dairy Queen.. i sold ice cream.." and then starts a whole conversation on what the hell ice-cream is lmao.

gonna be very honest with you dq-anon hope you don't mind me calling you that I've only really heard of dairy queen through that one girl's tiktoks because they don't exist in the UK dvjcedfc one of my wives (@angry-trashcan) told me more about what they're like and I focused more on the ice cream/ customer service voice part of it - I hope you like it!

“So you've mentioned needing to get back to your own world for the sake of your job, if it's alright may I ask what just what it is?"

"hmm? Sure? it's not really private, the only reason I haven't talked about it is because it hasn't come up in conversation yet."

"I work at a place called Dairy Queen™ or at least I did, they might have fired me…"

Time looks like he's about to ask me a question, not that I can blame him. Our worlds are very different. I doubt he's heard of it ever before. Well, I know that because it doesn’t exist here.

"I don't think I've ever seen you at lon lon ranch before, well and the fact that you've already said you're not from Hyrule."

"... There's a company called Dairy Queen in my world. we sell ice cream."

There’s the look I expected from him, utter confusion. Hyrule really doesn't have anything in common with my own world, nothing I could compare to the chains anyway. How could the post-industrial era even hope to compare to a mediaeval land where magic actually exists?

“...Ice cream?”

Yeah, I shouldn’t have expected him to know what that was. Really though does Hyrule not have ice cream at all? It’s not hard to make; with magic, it can’t be too hard to make a freezer.

“It’s well, it’s frozen cream with sugar and flavour? Honestly, I’m not sure the best way to describe it when I can't just show you. For now, I’ll just say that it tastes amazing and that you’re missing out.”

“Maybe you could show me some time then, we should be able to find the correct ingredients at some of the villages here and Wild has a spare ice rod or two to freeze it.”

“Keep the money for more important supplies Time, it’s not that big of a deal.”

Here’s where I’d happily take bets with the others for if he was going to drop it or not, what with how he rarely drops lectures it wouldn’t surprise me if he didn’t drop it until I agreed with him. But he seems to have more respect for things that people don’t want to talk about with their past than accidents so who knows?

“Aside from that then, what is your work like?”

"It's work..? I mean the only real skills I picked up are accidentally tipping drinks on people and my 'service voice'."

Most of this is just going to be him all confused, isn't it? what I wouldn't do at this point to show him exactly what I mean…

"You haven't got any more questions have you?"

"... what was that?"

"well I can't show you most things are like where I work, but I can show you how I act around customers. So how can I help you sir?"

Laughing at his face was so easy at this point, the fear in his eyes at how much I can change my voice so easily, worse than it's been towards any monster he's faced on this journey.

He’s more worked up about my voice than the shadow…

“...please don’t do that again [name].”

“Come on Time, it can’t be that bad can it?”

“You - you can stop pulling that face Old man.”

He really does live up to that name, now I can’t help but wonder if ‘old man’ is Hyrule’s equivalent of boomer, from how they use it? How mean would it be to teach wind and wild what that means? Introduce Hyrule to ‘Ok boomer’. I’d just have to make sure time never learns what it means or that it's from my world.

“Can we just… just go back to explaining what ice cream is?”

“I think I would prefer to tease you more. But fine I can go back to trying to explain it better for you.”

#sorry this took a while for me to write!!#I've been really busy with work and uni prep!!#hopefully when I start uni I can be more consistent #linked universe x reader #link x reader #lu time #time x reader #moss✦answers #moss✦writes

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eideticallys · 9 months

Text

Loving Joel (And His Dad Jokes)

pairing: joel miller x reader

summary: days like this make you realize how much loving joel makes everything worth it—even his stupid dad jokes.

genre: fluff

word count: 962

author's notes: in my mind, joel is happy and thriving. he's living his best life in jackson. and you're in for a treat because joel is very much happy in this fic & in love (with me). yup, have fun reading! also posted on ao3 (spencereids).

MOST PEOPLE WHO KNOW OF JOEL MILLER WOULD SAY HE’S THIS BROODING, MYSTERIOUS, AND SCARY GUY. And they were right, mostly. Joel was someone you should be scared of. He is a fierce and ruthless protector of those he cares deeply for. He would stop at nothing. He’d do everything for his family.

At the beginning of your relationship—or when you only knew of him—Joel was someone you didn’t expect to fall for. He wasn’t your ideal man so to speak. But for some reason, despite your differences, both of you grew closer and then one day, you just woke up and realized that Joel Miller was the one for you.

And it seemed the feelings were mutual.

As you got to know him, Joel was quite the polar opposite of his reputation once you had managed to thaw his hard exterior. He had this other side to him, all hidden from those who weren’t special to him. It made you feel giddy knowing someone as hardened by life as Joel is enamored by you—which wasn’t an easy feat. You’ve had your fair share of ups and downs. Love isn’t simple especially when the world fell apart a few years ago. But loving Joel has been nothing but worth it. Waking up next to him, getting through the day, and falling asleep right next to him has made living better—like life was still worth fighting for because you had Joel.

You love him, and he loves you.

And you especially love his dad jokes, even if they were insufferable from time to time.

“It’s quite warm today,” You said to your lover as you descended the stairs of your home. “Do you wanna have a picnic or something?”

Joel, who was busy tinkering with his new woodwork project, which particularly looked a lot like you, or so you think, looked up at you. “That’d be nice, sweetheart. Do you wanna go now?”

You nodded as you placed a peck on his salt-and-pepper hair. “Maybe this afternoon,” You replied, heading straight for the bathroom. “I’m gonna go shower and then I’ll head over to Ellie and Dina’s, so I can invite them. Why don’t you go ask Tommy and Maria too?”

“Want me to join you?” Joel joked, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.

“No, Joel.” You laughed as you threw him a dish towel, which he dodged easily as he was laughing now too. “If you’re joining me in the shower, we are never going to have that picnic!”

A few hours later, you were able to wrangle some bread and other snacks to take with you on your little picnic. Unfortunately, it was just you and Joel. Ellie and Dina had other plans, while Tommy and Maria had errands to do. But it was perfectly fine. You had a lot of time on your hands. A picnic in the future isn’t a farfetched plan for you to make.

“Jesus, I underestimated the heat today,” You claimed as you fanned your face. Joel was grinning at you as he looked like he thought of a joke you weren’t in on. “Care to share with the class, Mr. Miller?”

He simply shrugged and retorted, “Oh, it’s nothing, baby.”

“Out with it,” You nudged him. He shook his head no, to which you scowled teasingly. “Tell me!”

“Nope,” Joel snickered, pinching your cheek. “I’m not saying anything.”

You pouted and rolled your eyes. If he doesn’t want to tell you, then so be it. You were about to let go of the entire thing and dig into the food you laid out when the heat started becoming even more unbearable as if it were possible.

“Fine, don’t tell me anything,” You muttered. “But we’ve got to move over there. This heat is killing me.”

As you pointed to a bunch of trees where you could sit for shade, it’s like Joel could no longer hold back as he started guffawing, slapping his thigh in entertainment.

Oh, it’s that thing.

The thing in question was a pun he thought of. Real mature.

“Joel Miller!” You exclaimed as you started laughing along with him. One thing about Joel’s smile is that it’s as infectious as it’s your favorite thing in the world. “You’re worse than Ellie. Do you know that?”

“No, I’m not!” He denied, still laughing. “I haven’t even told you the pun yet.”

“Fine, tell me.”

Trying to stifle his laughter, Joel wheezed before schooling his face to a neutral expression. “I don’t think we should head over there. I don’t trust those trees.” He stared at the trees.

You looked at him, perplexed as to why. As far as you know, Jackson was the safest place you could be in, and those trees looked nothing out of the ordinary.

“Why?” You asked, starting to worry. “What’s wrong?”

You can slowly see the mischievous grin forming on Joel’s face.

They seem kind of shady.”

You groaned at him as Joel guffawed once again. You were starting to get looks from passersby as to what reduced the formidable Joel Miller while you were shaking your head.

“You’re so stupid,” You started chuckling. “Sometimes, I ask myself how can people take you seriously. Jesus, what was that pun?”

“It was funny!” Joel laughed, poking your side. “You even laughed.”

“I did because it was stupid.”

“That’s the point,” He retorted immediately. You rolled your eyes at him endearingly. “Puns are supposed to be so stupid that they’re funny.”

“You’re lucky I love you.” You responded immediately.

“Yes, ma’am,” Joel saluted. “I love you more.”

You smiled widely and landed a kiss on his stubbled cheek. Days like this make you realize how much loving Joel makes everything worth it—even his stupid dad jokes.

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madwomansapologist · 10 months

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Hello!

Can i ask for a esmeralda being obsessed with female reader who is a princess and goes to one of her dances ??

esmeralda being obsessed with you would include

synopsis: It was just another presentation. Just another normal day. But when Esmeralda saw you, when she saw your eyes shining, she knew nothing would never ever be the same anymore.

warnings: yandere themes.

note: Esmeralda was my bisexual awakening. I respect you, anon. A person of very good taste.

• You don't even know how many rooms there is to explore on your palace. So many floors, towers, hidden entrances. You can sleep every night on a different chamber and it would take you years to repeat one of them. And yet you feel imprisioned.

• Such a large place, but confiner still. Such a great amount of people there, but lifeless still. At every step, breath, dream: its walls echoed a question. A question that you knew everyone was somehow asking you, a question you didn't know how to respond, a question that haunted you since your childhood: "How smaller can you be?"

• It was only a matter of time until you finally run away. They should've know better.

• Disguised, covered with a faded cloak, running away from the guards who were looking for you: you were free. Wandering the streets, seeing your people living their lifes, you saw for the first time what life was like in France.

• Everything was fine until you made eye contact with the Guard Capitain. He saw you, he recognized you, and you saw his hand moving to warn his men where you were. Without further choice, you did the best you could: you blended in with the ground.

• Moving through the crowd afraid to be found, you didn't notice the dance until you were right in front of the stage. And when you saw, everything stopped. You were mesmerized.

• And so was Esmeralda. She noticed the movement. The disturb in the crowd. Esmeralda had to learn to watch her surroundings. The hooded person moving made her thought the dance would stop sooner, but then it feel from your face.

• Suddenly the music seemed louder. The same rhythm as her heartbeat. Esmeralda understood that no other sound could compared. It was a perfect symphony. Intricate melodies. Whole orchestras played just for her. Just for the two of you.

• Esmeralda danced looking into your eyes. It was a public presentation, but she was dancing for you. Only for you. She danced for your scared eyes, until they turned into hypnotized. She danced for you golden aura, for your perfect smile, for your body. Esmeralda danced just for you.

• Then she heard the guards. Esmeralda heard their orders, how they were searching for someone in the crowd. She heard everything, but she didn't take her eyes off of you. And she saw your fear.

"Come with me," Esmeralda reached out for you. You took a step back. "What's a poor girl gonna do alone in this world?"

You didn't want to come back to your home. You didn't want to be forced to pretend you're perfect. You didn't want to spend the rest of your life without knowing what it means to truly live. It may seem crazy, it may seem stupid, but you reached out for her. You trusted her.

As you both ran, the guards being left behind by Esmeralda's wit, you realized that you don't really have anywhere to go. You didn't plan this far. Most of your soul believed you wouldn't be able to even get out of the palace without being caught. "Where are we going?"

Your voice made her insides burn. With your delicate hand holding hers, your delicate, unscarred palm, Esmeralda felt like she was reborn. Everything about you felt new to her. "Somewhere safer."

• You felt so grateful that a total stranger chose to help you. At first you thought she may have recognized you, but when she asked for your name you knew she didn't. Esmeralda. A beautiful name, for a charming women.

• At her home, safer from the guards, your tiredness screamed through your body. Your eyelids were heavier, your muscles throbbed, your words tripped over your tongue. Esmeralda was so kind to offer you her bed.

• When she saw you were deep asleep, Esmeralda got closer. She hold your hand into hers, and read your palm's lines. So soft, so tender. She could stay this way forever. Just you and her, safe from the rest of the world.

• And Esmeralda will do anything to make it happen.

GENERAL TAGLIST: @suakemi @notanalienindisguiseblink

if you enjoyed, please reblog! i promise it makes a difference ♡

@ madwomansapologist.tumblr.

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dameronology · 2 years

Note

I’ve been dying for a pov where fem!reader is the one that dives in the lake and gets attacked but the demo bats and Eddie being the protective boyfriend he would be would immediately jump in and save you then panic when he sees what they did to you 🫶

oh my goshhh yes the angst (also apologies for how long this took me to write work has been kicking my butt)

once again i went off on an absolute tangent w this lmao i kinda delved into the stuff a little before batgate too hope u don't mind i just LIVE for protective eddie ngl

warnings: language, mentions of injury

eddie munson, as he has proclaimed several times, tends to run from things. he ran from most of his homework in 1984 hence why he's now a super senior; he ran from jason carver in the eighth grade when he stole his animal crackers and he ran, rather ironically, from the gym teacher last week when she chased him from underneath the bleachers with a half-smoked blunt in his hand

he even tried to run from his feelings for you at first. it was mostly fear because you're golden as fuck and the best thing that ever happened to him and honestly he was just scared of hurting you

but this is eddie munson we're talking about, who regularly trips over his own fuckin shoe laces. even in a metaphorical sense, because whilst sprinting from said feelings he skidded and fell on his ass for you and realised that actually, letting himself fall in love with you wasn't the worst thing in the world

that was two years ago & now you're eddie's entire fucking heart. he might feel a bit lost about the future sometimes but he knows it's gonna be ok when you're by his side

getting tangled up in all the upside down shit was beyond what either of you could have ever imagined; honestly his reaction at first was to run, but he knew as you & the others came after him, he didn't have to anymore

you stayed with him at reefer rick's from the second you found him; half because he was a wreck and needed you there, but also because people are dying left, right and center, and he is hellbent on keeping an eye on you

eddie is glued to your hip the entire time. he's clingy at the best of times but now, he won't sleep without both his arms wrapped tightly around you and he wakes up periodically in the night to check on you

and despite the fact he's arguably more traumatised by this entire thing, eddie is constantly asking if you're ok; asking about how you're doing with recent revelations and putting on a brave face to hide his own worries

everything becomes a lot more real when you have to go out with steve, robin & nancy to find the gate. you're both kind of involved now, right? and you're deadset on proving ed's innocence so you're gonna find this fucking monster

eddie doesn't like the idea of you coming with them and getting hurt. he likes the idea of leaving you on shore even less. sometimes you gotta pick the lesser of two evils

it's like you were gonna listen to him anyways. eddie has never been able to tell you what to do

so you get in the boat with them; eddie takes the seat beside you, large hand protectively spread out on your thigh and dark eyes scouring the water ahead of you for any danger

when the compass starts going wonky with a capital "aah!" you're kinda over the whole thing and before anyone can stop you, you've lost your shoes and jacket and you're jumping in the lake

you're too quick for anyone to stop you

eddie is less then pleased when you resurface a few minutes later, announcing that you've found the gate

"why would you do that?! are you fucking insane?! why?!"

before you can argue, you're being dragged back under

even though eddie had said before that he was only brave when it came to d&d, he's diving in right after you. shoes on, jacket on, he doesn't give a shit

an unambiguous sign of true love indeed

he goes down and down after you, not really caring if the other three follow you (they do btw once they all have a moment of "what a chaotic couple")

eddie is basically kicking his way through the gate, blindly beating the shit out of every demobat he's seeing

because like HELL are they gonna get away with hurting you

he's blinded by pure, white rage really. also a little bit of fear, but that just manifests itself in said rage

eventually, when you're finally free of the bats' grip on you, eddie is on his knees by your side, one large hand holding your head and the other checking your pulse

"please tell me you're alive. jesus christ, please say you're alive because if you're not i'm going to-"

"- i'm alive!" you manage to cough out, "just about"

he's taking you in his arms in seconds, pulling you gently into his chest and holding you there, calling you a dumbass and a fucking idiot but one that he loves so fucking much it hurts me right now

robin & steve take a step back for a moment, but nancy - being nancy - is proactive, tearing up her jumper and wrapping it around the wound on your side

eddie sheds his leather jacket, wrapping it tightly around your shoulders

the entire time that you're walking through the upside down, he's got an arm around your waist and one hand holding where your cut is in order to keep pressure on it

and he lets you ride the back of his bike !! no way in hell is he making you cycle in your condition

whilst the other three are communicating with dustin & erica, eddie is ransacking the upside edition™️ of his trailer for any medical supplies

of course there are none but it's sweet that he tries

he insists on going through the gate first so that you don't have to just land straight on the mattress

even though he falls flat on his ass, he manages to catch you

eddie munson will always be there to catch you

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ga-yuu · 3 months

Text

Kurama and Ibuki Sequel Cute moments Part 1 Ft. Rikka

While playing the route I was wondering where the cute and funny moments were because we're at the point where the 2nd necromancer is already killed. But here we are. Also I love that, despite this being Kurama and Ibuki's route, Rikka's moments are sprinkled here and there. I guess the selling point of this route is Rikka.

Kurama: *glares at Ibuki*

Ibuki: *smiles at Kurama*

Yoshino and the soldiers: *nervous*

The sliding door opens...

Tamamo: "It's me, Tamamo!"

Rikka: ".......it's me, Rikka..."

Tamamo: "We're here to start the very first Demon's Naughty Competition!"

Yoichi: "Yayy!!!" *clap clap clap~*

Kurama and Ibuki: "!?"

Rikka: "I don't want to talk to more people, but since Tamamo asked to, I can't say no to him. I'm doing this for Tamamo."

Kurama: "What are you up to Tamamo?"

Tamamo: "Like I said, Ibuki and Kurama, you guys are going to take part in a competition to deepen your friendship. Because it's crucial for the upcoming trials."

Kurama: "Competition? Oh, you mean, you're going to count who cuts down most heads in this room?"

Soldiers shivers in the corner.

Ibuki: "Now now, don't scare those poor guys."

Tamamo: "Yes, let me explain first. You two will be playing a ball throwing game. The person who throws most ball in the other person's basket will be the winner."

Tamamo: "And your reward will be, spending time with Yoshino."

Yoshino: "Why me!?"

Tamamo: "Because Yoshino, you can offer so many nice things."

Rikka: "Yeah, like a kiss..."

Yoshino: *blushing*

Rikka: "Or maybe something else?"

Rikka: "Maybe the winner gets to cuddle with Tamamo's tail."

Ibuki: "Who cares about that? I'm more interested in the Yoshino gift."

Yoshino: "Stop joking already!"

Ibuki: "Who says I'm joking!? Ask Kurama. What do you say, Kurama?"

Kurama: "Don't be ridiculous!"

Yoshino: "Phew~"

Kurama: "Yoshino, you as a whole could be a gift."

Yoshino: "No! No no no!"

Tamamo: "How about this, Kurama? If you win, you can fight Rikka. You're interested to see Rikka's powers, right?"

Kurama: *eyes sparkles*

Yoshitsune: "Kurama is having a change of heart."

Kagetoki: "Looks like things will start real quick."

Yoshino: "Yoshitsune-sama and Kagetoki-san too!"

Akihito: "I'll be the referee."

Ibuki: "Why are you in this?"

Akihito: "I'll start by deducting 1200 points from Ibuki because he's an old man."

Ibuki: "Don't be the referee if you're gonna be unfair."

Yasuchika: "Huh? Akihito-sama is the best referee! Best referee in this entire world! He's never unfair! Everything he says is fair! EVERYTHING!"

Akihito: "I know, Yasuchika. Thank you."

(These two are here too, is there anyone else?)

Sueharu: "Bets on who will win?"

Morinaga: "Ahh..it's hard. I can't predict this one."

Sueharu: "No one asked you Morinaga!"

Yoshitsune: "I bet Kurama will win."

Kurama: "Don't say the obvious."

Ibuki: "Is everyone that free tonight?"

Tamamo: "Anyways, it's decided that the winner will be able to claim Yoshino's time and can do anything with Yoshino as a romantic partner."

Yoichi: "Wow, doesn't that sound fun?"

Yoshino: "What if I say no?"

Rikka: "Looks like you need an example. Let me show you."

Pins her to the wall and holds her cheeks.

Rikka: "I'll show you what good things will happen if you fall in love with me. Maybe, some things might be immoral and troublesome to say it in words. How about I show you instead?"

Yoshino: *blushing and shakes her head vigorously* "No need for live examples! Enough!"

Rikka: "......."

Rikka: "Hehe...you look cute."

A smile appeared on Rikka's face and he moved closer----

Kurama: "How long will this example continue?"

Ibuki: "Now I want the prize. That's enough for the demonstration."

Rikka: "You're right. If I don't stop here, I might end up doing terrible things."

Morinaga: "Of course you should. Yoshino's safety is our main priority."

Yoshitsune: "...I was about to pull out my sword just in case."

Rikka: "Everyone really loves you."

Ibuki: *holds Yoshino's hand* "So the winner gets her, right?"

Kurama: "Then let's start the battle. No matter what it is, I'm going to win!"

*Game starts and few seconds later*

Yasuchika: "Oh my, the basket is in flames."

Yoichi: "This doesn't seem like a regular ball throwing game anymore."

Kurama: "Ibuki, what the hell are you doing to my basket!?"

Ibuki: "Look carefully."

Throws the ball and the ball goes straight through the basket making a hole.

(They're not holding back at all)

Akihito: "At least he's holding back a little."

Kagetoki:" Kurama is also counterattacking with his wind to deflect the ball."

Kurama: "You think you could win against a demon who can control wind? *starts glowing*

Yasuchika: "OMG! I'm getting excited!"

Ibuki: "Let's see, shall we?" *starts glowing*

Yoshitsune: "It looks more like a supernatural tournament than a regular ball throwing game."

Tamamo: "That's why it's called the Demon's Naughty competition in the first place."

Yoshino: "This is too naughty!"

Tamamo: "What can we do, if they are young in both mind and body?"

The flaming balls go back and forth in lightning speed and baskets have melted to crisp. All the soldiers moved away and watching the fight from afar.

Benkei: "Hey! What the hell is going on here!?"

Benkei came running and behind him was Shigehira-kun in shock.

Shigehira: "What is this? Am I in hell?"

Yoritomo: "Everyone looks excited tonight."

Morinaga smiled happily at Yoritomo who approached calmly.

Morinaga: "Yes! Looks like the roof is gonna explode."

Sueharu: "Also, the only things that the Rebels and myself have destroyed are things of no value. So please sent all the repair costs to the Imperial Court, thank you."

Right after Sueharu said that.

Yoshitsune and Akihito: "Ah!"

Kurama and Ibuki's powers collided with each other and the roof explodes.

#ikemen series #ikemen genjiden #cybird ikemen #cybird otome #otome #cybird #ikegen #ikemen genjiden kurama #ikemen genjiden ibuki

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enc95 · 7 months

Text

Kiri is braiding his hair. "What are they talking about?"

"Dad what's you want to come back to us." Her hands pause. "I miss you so does Lo'ak and Neteyam."

"I know." He leans back fully in her lap. " You have a mom and dad there and a mother here. I don't. When your dad holds you do you feel safe?"

She nods her dad was great in his arms, she never felt afraid. "Does anyone in the village make you feel safe?"

"One person but they wouldn't want me."

"Oh I think you might be surprised." A woman says her in playful voice.

The two gasp. "Mama!"

Kiri stands jumping into the blue blue arms of Grace. Spider blushes; it was rare that any adults saw him being that affectate with Kiri. It wasn't looked down upon; many Na'vi kids had close friendships like theirs but Spider was Spider. Kiri was all smiles as she cuddled with the woman. "Mama I missed you."

"Oh my pretty girl I've been here." The two nuzzle each other. "I came to help your friend."

Spider gets really red now. "Me?"

Holding out a long hand she leads them to the fighting adults. Slywanin has a murderous look in her eyes. Tsu'tey was holding her back. Jake had said that he would look after Spider. "You! You didn't make him a songcord!"

Spider leans into Grace's leg hiding himself. It made him feel very sad that he didn't have a song chord. That others got to wear a record of their life with the pretty beads and smooth rocks. He asked Norm if he had anything like that. He showed him a medical file it made him feel worse. The feeling only deepened when Nash and Mary started a Baby Box with their first kid.

"Children!"

They all stop yelling, especially seeing the wide eyes of Spider with tears. Jake softens. "You're right."

Slywanian crosses her arms. “I know I’m right you shxwang.”

"I have heard Eywa,” Grace says, ending the conversation. “She said while Spider may stay if he chooses. But if he wants to return he may do so with her blessing."

"What kind of blessing?" Kiri ask still holding Mothers her neck.

"Spider at his return will be able to breathe air, to eat the foods of the Na'vi." Her hand caresses his face. "He'll be a Na'vi soul in human form."

"Really?" Both Kiri and Spider ask.

Sylwanin even looks taken aback. She motions for Spider to join her. He does so climbing into her arms. "Why would she do that?"

Grace has a sorrowful look as she strokes Kiri’s hair, seeing her daughter grow gave her more joy then she ever had in life but it tore her heart to hear Kiri calling Neytiri mother. Even though her student had done and continued to do a wonderful job as her parents. “Because we are dead and these children are not. In the world they will live and grow. All any mother wants is for her child to grow into an adult to live a full life.”

“My love we have to think of him.” Tsu’tey says his hand on Sylwanin's back.

Spider for the first time did want to go back but he was in the arms of a woman who had so easily accepted him as her child. Even if he was back there, who would do that? Part of what made this place heaven was that when people died they had no problems. His father had sent many of them here but they were here forever safe with the ability to see loved ones. The ones left behind could see them too. She was holding him her hand on his head as if to shield him from the choice.

Jake steps forward. “Spider?”

The boy hides in the hair. “Please make him leave.”

Tsu’tey glares at him. “You can go now Jake Suli comes back with these gaudiens.”

The man felt like he’d been slapped back into the world which he kinda had been. Kiri joines him a moment later. Her head on his thigh, her round amber eyes looking at him. “Daddy you are gonna find Spider a parent here right?”

His hand pets her head. “I’m tryin’ baby girl.”

*************************************************

Jake had said the site of the old shack was not to be visited. It was a place of darkness where the demon lay. The shame of not burying the dead was a punishment the last they could give. She came here before she watched him rot. The smell was horrible. She had been pregnant then. Being so young she needed to see the monster rot. It was the only way she knew that her child would be safe.

She was back again.

“Demon?” Not touching him she could hear him.

“ Hello Mrs. Sully, long time, how is my Boy?” He was in the still air.

She turns defensive of the child, “He is not yours.”

“ Oh who does he belong to then? No one wants him, he'll grow-up one day, you know this.”

“No,” Her hand is on the knife, her voice tight with anger. “He is blessed.”

There was a derogatory laugh. “ Come on now you don’t believe that. Anything that comes from me is bad. We both know that why you come here.”

“No,” She screams it out the word echoes in the still air. This demon was nothing but bones how did he still have power over her. “No.” It's a softer sound now when she was called Spider, a demon he never tried to defend himself. He would just leave to shed his tears in silence. Neytiri knew the words hurt but now she knew just how much. “You are dead.”

A branch snaps she draws her arrow, shooting it into the darkness. That mocking tone speaks again. “ I might be dead but you're the one who keeping here.”

“What?”

“I live in your mind dearling, you might have killed my body but here I’m alive here.” A pain sparks in her mind; it hits hard, forcing her to her knees.

A mother nantang comes out the brush dropping the arrow at her feet, with her is a trio of pups sniffing the remains. These animals had never known the man in the metal suit. Spider didn’t know him either, she sits by the bones watching the pups play over them.

"No." She impales the arrow into the ground feeling a weight come off of her body; it was like heavy stone had been placed on her shoulders. Standing the animals run. “Demon, you are dead I kill you.”

That night as the people gather for the meal Mo’at stands before them. “My People I have a story. It was many years ago long before our grandparents' parents were born. It was a time of war among two clans whose names are only to the Great mother now. One clan was victorious in this battle leaving only one child alive from the enemy clan.”

Lo’ak and Neteyam lean into Jake's side as Kiri safe in Neytiri’s arms shutters at the loss of a whole clan. “Why is she telling this story?”

“It is a lesson ma Jake.” Eywa had spoken her storm was readying them for the change to come.

“This child was brought back to the clan's territory but he was never made a child of these people. He lived the life of a ghost never truly being seen as one of them. It planted a bitter seed in his soul. Forbidden from even sharing the site of the Great Mother so he couldn’t even find peace with his ancestors.” She pauses, letting the words sink in the home that they have a connection to the past.

“It was only when he reached the age of manhood that he was sent out into the world. However with no clan to teach him he soon found himself starving. The bitter seed sprouted into hunger for vengeance.” A wind whips the fire sending bits of ash into the crowds. “He knew he would be dead so he returned that night. Setting the whole village on fire, the screams heard for miles around the story trusted the tshaki of each surviving clan. It is a truth that even the youngest among us must understand.” Her eyes are pointed to her daughter. “A child not embraced by the village will burn it down to feel its warmth.”

“Why?” A voice says from the back of the crowd. “Why do you tell us this story now?”

Looking at Kiri Jake stands. “Spider. The humans have abandoned him…they would be content to let his body fail to leave him with the Great Mother.”

Whispers break out he was human but a child. Children were not meant to die so young had he been one of them he would still wouldn't be allowed outside the village. They are all silenced with a rise of Mo’ats hand. “It is true Ewya in her infant grace has seen fit to give him a gift. Should Spider return to us he will be changed, able to eat our food and breathe our air.”

“Who will care for him?”

“He is cursed.”

“He is blessed.”

“Who can even love him?”

“Not even Trouk Maktu had taken the boy.”

“My people.” Her voice is raised again. “Be calm, for I have chosen to take him as my son. He will live with me under my protection. I know some among you are blinded by the actions of his father and mother. He was babe when our home fell. Spider was born here and he chose to live as we do. Eywa has spoken who will speak against the mother.”

There are nods between people in agreement. Jake moves swiftly, “I was once a human I chose to leave behind. You let me be my people. Human science couldn’t make Spider Na'vi Eywa know him; she says he is her son. I will gladly call him brother. It was my arrogance that has robbed me of calling him my son.”

Eyes turn to Neytiri, all eyes as even Spider in the old tree see’s her safe in Slyawanins arms. “I will accept him as my brother.”

As they move to sleeping pods, Mo’at stops her daughter. “Did you mean that daughter? Would defend him?”

“I will.” The words flow out her mouth as smooth as if she was talking about her own children.

Mo'at nods that it was a lesson painful to learn. Holding a piece of wood Mo'at nods. "You are the eldest daughter, it is your responsibility to make weapons for your siblings. Will you make your brother a bow?"

I was the wood of an old hometree, they had taken as much of it as possible. Everyone who lived got a bead made from the tree. The shared loss of their home. Taking the wood it was small his bow would be small even as an adult it would be child size. Putting her hands over her mothers the two locked eyes. "It will be my honor mother."

As the rest of the tree sleeps Spider holds onto his pseudo parents. “I don’t know what to do now? I love you both.”

“We love you too, we always will find you here all the time.” The man says even his voice is thick with tears.

Slywanin holds him breathing in the scent of the boy, all her life she dreamed of being a mother raising sons with Tsu’tey in peace was all she wanted. Now she had a taste of it. “Grace is right, you can grow there.”

His mind goes back to the fire there where people who didn’t like that Spider would come back. A human pet was a fine thing but a human son that was not tolerated. “Not everyone will like me.”

“Most will and do. There has never been sky na’vi before you are a miracle.”

Spider made his way the next morning to Trudy’s shack. There was nice music playing in the room. She had given him a cookie. “I didn’t think it would be this hard. I’ve never been wanted by anyone now I have to two woman ready to be my mother.”

“Your mother wanted you. Paz could have gotten rid of you but she didn't. She was willing to spend eighteen years here to raise you. It's why she fought on the side of the RDA, she didn’t care about the company she wanted you to live.”

He nibbles on his cookie. “Why can’t she be here too?”

“Spider our actions have a cost good bad in between we all get judged.” She lets him sit with her words.

It wasn’t fair Pandora wasn’t a place for human kids. Paz knew that the RDA wasn’t set-up for kids the handful of times that a woman did get pregnant she would abort. A few tired to make it to term but they didn’t make it. Paz said that any kid of hers would be too tough to kill coming from the droughtlands of Southern California. She grow-up hustling water as every oz was needed for crops. Quaritch was from the delta storms that would come in, washing away whole towns; both of them were too stubborn to let earth kill them. It was that the offspring of that pair would near indestructible. Hell technically he was brain dead but here he was eating in her kitchen.

*************************************************

Norm was pacing when Jake landed; it was nearly an eclipse. The last scan had shown his brain was starting to atrophy. They had been working his legs and arms while his body had started to fail. "Finally did you find someone? Is he coming back?"

Jake smiles. "Mo'at. She said she would take him." His face goes through a few shades of red. "And your mate was okay with that?"

"Yeah." In fact she was making his bow now. "Brother you're about to lose your shit."

Mo'at was good as tsahki she does hold power in the village. It would protect Spider he was anxious about Spider being so far from them. Really from him since Norm had spent the last three years rising him. Here he was an orphan his Dad was an asshole but not the demon that Na'vi saw him as. Spider living close to the village alone he hoped that the boy would miss the compound enough to visit. At least he would come a few times a week for human lessons. "That's good Mo'at is good."

Now for the hard part. "Grace was me when I was with him. Eywa said…" Don't be a pussy Sully his marine voice says. "She said that when Spider returns he'll be different."

Turning from the pacing Norm is slightly paler. "Different?" He was expecting that his mind was in another realm even Jake came back different. It took time for him to adjust. "How is it different?"

Ewya said that she would change him so that he could breathe our air and eat our food." Nothing, no sound comes from the norm. Peering down Jake isn't sure the man is breathing. The mask is hissing but the chest isn't moving. He pokes him. "Norm?"

His eyes dim then he takes a huge breath. "Okay. I think my brain shorted out for a minute. I thought you said Spider our human Spider will be able to breathe the highly toxic air that almost killed you."

"And eat the food."

The short laugh norm lets out is more like a horrified gasp. "The food that causes our hearts to stop or tumors on the liver or the stuff that paralyzes our lungs that's what he can eat?"

"Yeah."

"And if I say no." His breathing was almost at panic level.

Now Jake crosses his arms. "Norm you one of the tallest here and I inspect but my six year old is about to be taller than you. How would you stop me?"

It takes him a minute to think it over. "Fine but I will be living in the shack for a while making sure his transition goes smoothly. If he even gets one rash I'll bring him back here."

Holding out his hand. "Fair."

Max and a few other trusted friends, the one carried for Spider who visited him, loaded the boy into the helicopter. They all share a look, no matter what happens when they get there Spider won’t be theirs’. In truth they had done the best they could; they hoped it would be enough to have called the boy back. Nina, a chemist , had removed the paper gown putting the twsin on his body. “He ever liked human clothes.”

“To be fair he didn’t wear them when he was a baby.” Asher said thinking of the baby Spider running in the lab with just a diaper. Those early years of learning how to cut clothes to child size made of Spider’s early childhood years spent in oversized t-shirts. When they finally managed to get a pair of shorts he hated them.

Max had let out the locks, the curly hair hung like a veil of gold rings. “Our wild man.”

Jake stood before the tree of souls it was pulsing as the village members sat in the circles. All the adults had come either it was respect for mo’at, fear of Eywa or just because it was right. The children and teenagers stood to the sides watching. Kiri, Lo’ak and Neteyam are at the center. Mo’at sets them in semi-circle. “Be strong he will be laying here Lo’ak you hold his hand on his left. Neteyam you will hold the right.”

Both boys nod. “We will.”

“Kir when they lay him down I want you to put your hand on his heart guide his soul back.”

“I won’t let him stray away.”

Spider sat on the rock that he and Kiri liked most; it had a smooth flat surface big enough for the two of them to sit on. Now it was him and Slywanin, she was painting him, “Thanks but I can’t take anything with me.” He looks over at Tsu’tey. “Right?”

The man holds a bead that was carved by a father for a son. “I don’t know, my son.” He puts the small piece of red amber in his hand. He had carried the amber with him since he was a young boy. His father had found the amber saying it was part of a large chunk that he carved his brother's beads from; this was the last piece meant for his child. “The great mother tells us that all energy is connected. I was buried with this but like you I think it's time it needs to return to the people.”

Spider held it like it was fragile glass, his eyes well with tears. “I don’t have a songcord.”

Kissing the top of his head his spirit father looks him in the eyes. “You will.”

A atrokinria floats down to the rock Slywanin nods like was speaking. “You follow it back.”

He hugs them both. “I’ll come back here and tell you all about training.”

Tsu’tey lets out a hard breath. “Don’t listen to everything Jake Suli says he might be toruk makto but was a sky master.”

Knowing the change in her sister Sylwanin gives the boy encouragement. “My sister will try to mend her past mistakes.” Her blue hand is on his chest. “Listen to your heart, it will tell you when it's mended.”

“I will.” He promises holding the bead in his hand he walks forward into the unknown. Like the day he fell he’s alone still not afraid. This time he knows who is with him, she is in the air a cool breeze that soothes the body on a hot day. The whiff of the warm fire after a cold morning of gathering mushrooms. Feeling his arms get heavy he hears a new sound, the voice of Mo’at she is calling. Each step is like moving in knee deep mud. Thinking he was almost there he fell on his back. The woodsprites surrounded him.

#avatar #fanfic #miles spider socorro #james cameron avatar #ao3 writer #atwow fanfiction #neytiri #grace augustine #spider socorro

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shuriwandanatwife · 2 years

Text

Dark!Natasha x Wife!reader

Summary:Your wife isn't the person you thought she was

"Mommy can we watch television please" My three year old daughter asked and I nodded, kissing her face, I lifted her up and we made our way downstairs and into the living room. We both sat down and she started smiling "What do you want to watch bubs?" I asked her and she sat thinking "Power puff girls" she answered and I smiled "OK how about I look for it while you get your favorite snacks" I said and she nodded and ran to the kitchen while I switched channels.

While looking for power puff girls I stumbled across the news and I stopped for a moment to see what was on "A serial killer is on the loose, Female around 27 was spotted at the scene of the crime holding a gun, she has been spotted many times near crime scenes, unfortunately we haven't been able to identify her due to her wearing hoodies and masks hiding her face from the camera, if you happened to recognize this woman by any means please report it the police" The news reporter said and after the picture was uploaded on the screen.

The remote fell from my hand when I saw who it was "That's Nat's favorite hoodie" I said but then shook it off "No maybe it's a coincidence" I thought but another picture appeared Nat's red hair being a bit visible, as pictures were displayed on the screen each resembling Nat in some form everything started making sense, "Mommy I got the snacks" My daughter said breaking me out of a trance "Honey how about we take a little vaction" I said lifting her up going upstairs "Yayy" she said clapping and I started packing some clothes for us "Mommy, you have to pack for mama as well silly" she said giggling and I smiled and took two of Nat shirts, I moved to our closet and started taking up our credit cards and some money and I put on Natalie's shoes and we started heading downstairs towards the door.

It was all coming to me now, I have never actually been to Nat's *work place*, Natasha and I have been together for seven years, married for four and I have never been there, She gets upset when I ask too many questions about it, When we had Natalie she insisted that I stay home and take care of her while she worked.

We made it to the door and Natalie tugged on my shirt "We can't leave where's mama?" She asked "Mama is gonna meet us there" I said and opened the door just to be greeted by Natasha.

"MAMA" Natalie screamed happily and jumped into Nat's arms "What's happening?" Nat asked her while maintaining eye contact with me "Mommy planned a vacation for all of us" my daughter said smiling "Oh did she" Nat said smiling and then turning to our daughter "It's kinda cold outside how about you run upstairs to get your jacket" she said tickling Natalie and she giggled and ran upstairs and when Natalie wasn't in plain sight Natasha grabbed both of my hands and pinned me against the door and I started shuffling trying to get away "Stop!" She ordered her grip tighten "Natasha let us go please" I said begging "Why would I let the two people I love the most in this world go" she asked chuckling "You're a murder" I said and she stood there "Maybe but only to protect you guys, I'm not the bad guy here for trying to protect my family, I only kill those who I see as a threat to you guys, I did it all for love" she said and I glared at her "You're a monster and I'm going to make sure you never see Natalie or me ever again" I said and she pressed a knife to my throat "You're not leaving and your worst not taking my daughter away" she said angry.

"Mama I got it" Natalie said running down the stairs and Natasha stepped away from me and Natalie ran into the living room towards Natasha and Nat picked her up "This isn't a lot of clothes for our vacation is it?" She asked and Natalie shook her head "How about we go pack some more" Natasha said and Natalie smiled "OK let's race" she said putting her down and Natalie ran up the stairs "Leave and I'll make sure you never see her again, and you wouldn't want Natalie stuck with me now would you" Nat said and walked after Natalie and I stood there terrified of my own wife.

Natasha came back down with a lot of bags packed and I looked at her shocked "Why...Why so many bags?" I asked "The longer our vacation the better right?" She said and turned to Natalie and she nod laughing, Natasha loaded everything in the car and then strapped Natalie in her car seat and then forced me to sit up at the front with her.

While driving Nat held my hand and I moved it away and she grabbed it and held onto it "Natalie?" She said "Yes mama" my daughter answer "Would you be sad if mama was ever to leave?" She asked looking back at Natalie for a second "Mama are you leaving? NO don't go" Natalie said crying and Nat turned to me and smirked "No baby I'm not leaving I meant to leave and go get you some candy from there" she lied pointing to a store and Natalie stopped crying and I glared at Natasha.

We have been driving for hours and Natalie fell asleep in the back "She's gonna be hungry when she wakes so I suggest you stop at the next store and get her some thing to eat and it seems like a long drive so get more snacks" I said and Natasha looked at me and smile, We reached a store and Nat got out of the car bringing the car keys with her and as soon as she entered the store I un buckled my seat belt and ran to the back for Natalie and when I un buckled her strap I was dragged away from her and slammed into the car "You think I'm fucking stupid" Nat screamed at me and I was a bit dizzy from the hit and I felt liquid and touched the back of my head to see it bleeding and Natasha let go of me and hurried and pulled me into the car and into her lap "No No baby I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you, I would never hurt you" she apologized looking for where was bleeding "Ok its not serious" she said and kissed my forehead "Baby I'm sorry but as I told you I can't loose both of you" she said and I tried to focus because I was still feeling dizzy and she moved me to the passenger seat and re buckled Natalie's car seat and then placed a hand on my thigh and I rested my head against the window crying and she kissed my cheek,wiping my tears "I already packed snacks in the back" she said moving her hand up and down my thigh and then she drove off.

Let me know if I should post part 2

#natasha romanoff #dark natasha #dark natasha x reader #paypal me

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mycrushisnotalibero · 2 years

Text

broken promises

Donatello x reader

Summary:

Donatello wants you all to himself so you agree to date him, even though you yourself are not in love with him, yet. You make rules to make the realtionship work and you slowly develope feelings as well.

WARNINGS! PLEASE READ:

At the beginning Donnie doesn't really get what consent is, so he wants to sleep with you (not a rape-scene, obviously!!) bc thats just what couples do, so you have to explain it to him.

At the end a stranger touches your butt (sexual harrassment)

Reader has a panic attack at the end (bc of the sexual harrassment)

PLEASE DON'T READ IF YOU'RE SENSITIVE ABOUT THOSE TOPICS

english is not my fist language so excuse any mistakes

Heres the AO3 Link:

https://archiveofourown.org/works/42065283

-------

It was Saturday. The perfect day for a hangout at the lair, you sat wedged between Leo and Raph, laughing at something Mickey had said. The atmosphere was chill and pleasant. April and you brought Pizza with you and the boys had set up a corner with blankets and beanbags for you all to lounge, relax and just talk the night away. With all the commotion, none of you noticed Donnie not saying a word throughout the evening. He just sat on the floor, taking it all in.

“Here look.” Raph said, unbinding his mask and tied it around your head. “Ha! See? It looks great on you!”

“Woah, looking like that maybe you should go on the next mission with us.” Leo said, wrapping his arm around you giggling. You laughed with him.

The Evening went on. April put on some music and pulled you up to dance with her. Mickey joined and grabbed your hand, twirling you around. You laughed and after the third rotation you became dizzy, stopping Mickey from turning again by hugging him.

“Slow down, Mickey.” You cackled, hugging him tighter. Suddenly Donnie sprang up from where he was sitting.

“(Y/N)!” Everybody looked at him. His expression was furious. “We need to talk.” He said looking at you, his brows furrowed.

“Yikes, he looks pissed, what did you do, (y/n)?” April questioned you. But you didn’t know either. Following him to his Lab you considered the possibilities. You didn’t break anything in his Lab, right? God, you hoped you didn’t. Did you forget an important meeting or something. Being in thought, you didn’t realize you already being at your destination, his laboratory. He had stopped walking and turned to you, you bumped into him.

“Oh, sorry, I-“ You began to say, but he grabbed the front of your shirt and pulled you up. You let out a shriek. He looked scary, standing in this half-lit room, with this dark look on his face.

“You-“ he said, holding you tighter by your collar. You started to sweat. “-are gonna go out with me.”

You looked at him confused. “Go where?” You asked, he scoffed.

“Don’t play dumb, I’m saying that I’d very much like you to date me.” Seeing you still looking confused he continued, letting your shirt go.

“I haven’t been able to uphold my composure for a while now whenever you touch the others. It’s really starting to agitate me. So, I’m just gonna make you mine!”

There was a short pause.

“Donnie, you like me?” you asked.

“I do.”

“…Romantically?”

“Certainly.”

“Your reason?” He looked thoughtful for a second before answering.

“I don’t really know. I’ve never been in love before? Ever since April introduced you to us, I’ve been watching you and it’s really been bugging me.”

Your mind started to remember something in that moment. It was a documentary you watched a few weeks back. It talked about Baby-ducks and how they perceive the first thing they see after hatching as their mother and subsequently develop affection for it. You blinked, understanding. This guy’s been living inside the sewers with his brothers for years, not really interacting with the outside world, let alone people his age. And if he did, it was because he had to fight them.

You being the first friendly acquaintance he spent a lot of time with, except for April, which you learned was more like a sister to the boys. He mistook the first stirring of attachment for someone as love. But you couldn’t tell him that, he wouldn’t understand. You didn’t know what to do. Maybe…

“Alright.” You began. “I’ll go out with you.”

“Really?” he looked bewildered.

“Yeah, but in exchange you can’t get angry anymore when I talk to the others…it’s annoying.”

Instead of explaining to him what you concluded about his feelings, you felt it was easier just to date him, until he realizes his mistake on his own.

“Okay, I understand.” He spoke. You held out your hand to shake his.

“It’s a promise then!” you said. “And if you break it, we break up.” He hesitated but shook your hand none the less.

“It’s settled then.” You smiled. He didn’t say anything in return. He just grabbed you by the shoulder pulling you toward him. His lips touched yours. You froze.

“I’d never imagined you’d agree to this so easily, I estimated having to put more effort into it, so my equanimity is kind of crumbling right now. But that means that from now on you’re all mine.” He grinned, walking out of the Lab, doing a fist-bump in the air. “Donatello, you did it again.” And he was gone.

Your knees buckled and you sank to the floor. “Shit.” You put your hand over your mouth. “What have I done.”

-------

After a few minutes of you trying to find your composure and slowing down your racing heart you began to walk back to the others.

“-and then they said yes and I kissed them and now we are dating.” You heard Donatello say and you saw him standing in front of the others his arms outstretched gesturing wildly. April and the boys looked at him dumbfounded. When they noticed you, their eyes fell on you staring at you questioningly. Donatello, realizing their eyes weren’t on him anymore turned around.

“(Y/n)! There you are!” he exclaimed, rushing toward you hugging you tightly. Your whole body became rigid and you blushed from embarrassment. You felt all eyes on you. Donnie then pulled back, only to lean in to kiss you again. In your panicked state you raised your hand and slapped him.

You heard gasps from the others, Donatello looking at you with wide eyes. You took him by the arm and pulled him back to the Lab.

He sat against the wall holding his face where you had slapped him, looking up at you. You paced in front of him then stopped and met his eyes.

“I would like for you to keep our relationship a secret.” You said.

“But why?” he answered with a hurt expression. “We are not doing anything we would need to hide.”

He was right. Under normal circumstances being loving in front of others was a normal relationship-thing to do. But seeing that you only agreed to date him since it would end quickly - as quickly as he would understand his mistake of loving you – you didn’t want the others to know. It saved you a lot of embarrassment and teasing.

“Well, it’s embarrassing, I don’t like the others staring. So please stop hugging me and doing other stuff in front of them.” You tried to explain. He didn’t answer, he just looked at your somber expression.

“Promise me, if you can’t keep your promise, I can’t date you!” he flinched then.

“Alright, alright….” He began. “I don’t understand what you mean, but if you don’t like it then I won’t do it. I’ll conceal our relationship and I’ll refrain from grabbing you in front of the others. I promise, so please…-” he held out his hand. “-stop making that face.” You extended your arm grabbing his hand in yours, shaking it.

You sighed and sat next to him, for a few seconds neither one of you said anything, then you felt his head drop on your shoulder. You looked at him. He was being needy. You’d never imagined Donatello being the kind of person to be needy with the one he likes. You felt him nuzzle closer to you. It looked adorable. For a few minutes you let him lean on you.

“We should get back to the others.” You said, standing up.

When you arrived back where the other were sitting you heard them talking with each other with hushed voices.

“There they are.” April whispered and you looked down ashamed. Donatello noticed.

“I was just joking.” He then proclaimed. The others didn’t look convinced. “You know me, Donatello, always the funny one. But I see my jestering didn’t get through to you. So, I’ll reiterate: me and (y/n) are not dating.” Mickey was the first one to react and speak up.

“Ha…haha, okay you got us there Donnie, uh- you two wanna sit back down?” You did, the rest of the evening went by with Donnie not once mentioning you or your relationship. April still teased you about it, when you walked out of the lair.

-------

It had been an uneventful day for you. It was getting dark as you walked back to your apartment. You decided to take the short route through the park next to your complex. As you had made it almost half way through you felt yourself being pulled into the nearby bushes. You wanted to scream and hit whoever had the nerve to touch you, but as you looked up you saw Donatello. He pushed you down by your shoulders so you laid on the grass.

“Alright, we should have some privacy here.” He said, kneeling down in between your legs.

“Huh? For what?” you asked.

“What do you think, we’re gonna have se-“ “-HEY, HEY, WHA-“ “Shhh, be quiet, do you want someone to find us?” He put his hand over your mouth. “Mhh.” Was all you could say. You had forgotten how strong he was, pulling at his arm to get his hand off your face was impossible for you. His other hand slowly went under your shirt. Tears began to fill your eyes. As he leaned over you, he saw your watery eyes and his widened.

“Are you cryin-“ In that moment both your hand came flying to his face from either side. He flinched back sitting up, you did the same and pushed at his shoulders to throw him off completely. You scrambled back.

“Are you insane?” you yelled at him.

“That’s what I want to ask. It’s fine, as long as the other are not here, right?”

“NO!” you sat down in front of him. “Why would you think it’s okay to do this- and in the bushes, at that.”

“We’re dating, let me at least do that.” He looked at you bewildered.

“If you want to do something like…that. You have to get consent from both parties involved!”

“Then give me consent.”

“No! Donnie, you’re being selfish! Kissing me without my input, wanting to have sex with me without my permission, you can’t do that, that’s not love! All you do is stuff you want, without thinking about my feelings first, wanting me all to yourself…it’s just selfish possession!”

You took a breath, you wanted him to realize this baby-duck-stuff on his own, but he was being an idiot. You had no other option than to tell him. Now he would get what a huge dimwit he’d been.

“Okay…I won’t kiss you until you agree, I won’t touch you until you agree and I won’t have sex with you until you agree.” He stood up, looking down to you. That’s not how you planned this at all. He reached his hand out to you and you flinched lightly.

“Come on, I said I won’t do anything.” He came down to your level. “Promise.” He held out his hand again and you shook it. You two were still dating.

-----

After your little incident in the park, Donatello kept his promise of not touching you.

For about a week your life got back to normal, you almost forgot about the whole dating thing.

Almost. You felt that he was unsatisfied with your arrangement. He tried not to show it, but his mood showed that he was frustrated. Today, the group had planned to have a movie night in the lair, when you and April arrived the boys already sat in the living room, except for Donnie. As you sat down on the couch, Leo came up to you.

“You’ll love this movie, (y/n), I picked it out with you in mind.” He slung his arm around your shoulder.

“Wow, now I’m actually excited to know, what you think it is I like.” You laughed lightly. Suddenly the atmosphere in the room changed, from light and happy to absolutely murderous. When you looked back, Donnie was standing in the doorway, with a dangerous look on his face. His face was twisted into a scowl. You stood up, walking towards him, taking his wrist in your hand, you pulled him to the side.

“That was just a friendly interaction, Donnie.”

“I didn’t say anything.” Suddenly you heard Leo giggling quietly. When you glanced at him, he was whispering something in Aprils ear, while looking at you.

“We’re not dating, Nardo!” Donnie said. “Come on, you’re making (y/n) uncomfortable.” Leonardo looked surprised then made eye contact with you.

“Sorry, we’ll stop.” You nodded, looking back at Donnie with one eyebrow raised.

“You do know that you were the one who told them in the first place, right?”

“I’m aware.” He looked sad. You wrecked your brain for a way to cheer him up.

“Donnie, after the movie…do you want to go grab a coffee with me?” His eyes widened and he looked at you.

“You…you don’t mind?”

“I’m totally fine with that, that’s why I asked.” You smiled at him.

“…yeah…yeah, I’ll get coffee with you.” He said quietly, holding his hand in front of his face to hide the blush. Your mouth opened in surprise, Donnie was overcome with joy and was trying to hide it. His blushing face was adorable.

After the movie ended you and Donnie began your walk to the nearest coffeeshop. He was wearing his hoodie, so he could hide his face. You were in thought. Donnie had protected you. Sure, it was just from his brother, but it made you happy. Maybe continuing to date him was a bad idea.

As you opened the door you heard a bell chime, Donnie and you ordered some coffee. As you waited a few feet away from the counter you looked at him. He was looking at you, his hood darkening his features while his eyes were half lidden.

“You kind of look like a dog right now.” You said smiling, your hand reaching out to pat his head.

“I’m a turtle…” he answered, looking away from you blushing.

-----------

You sat in Donnies Lab on a chair, he had put in there just for you. You were on your phone just scrolling, Donnie tinkering with one of his newest inventions. You were getting kind of bored and got up, deciding to get something to drink. When you were almost out the door you felt something tuck on the back of your shirt, you turned. It was Donnie, he had stood up and held on to your shirt with his hand. When he realized what he’d done he let go, looking away.

“Sorry.” He just mumbled. You looked at his face, it was slightly red. You turned and walked up to him.

“Donnie, if you want attention, you can just ask.” You told him.

“I wasn’t thinking that.” He answered, sitting back on his chair. You did the same, rolling your chair up to his.

“But I was wondering…do you have any experience in this kind of area?” He looked at you.

“What area? Like…like that?” He frowned.

“No…just dating-stuff.”

“No, not dating.” You contemplated for a few seconds. “But I had crushes before, like that one guy in Kindergarten…” you twirled your chair, coming to a stop with you facing away from him.

He dropped his head on your shoulder then.

“Donnie?” you asked slowly looking at him.

“I love you…I love you…I love you (y/n)!” You felt his face scrunch up.

“I thought that if I started dating you this weird feeling inside me would go away, but no such luck. I’d hoped that if I make you mine physically, I’d settle down, but I guess not.”

And you realized when he said that, that he was absolutely and utterly serious about you. You did something horrible by agreeing to dating him. This whole thing wasn’t a misunderstanding of his affection for you. He truly and desperately wants you. You were the one with the wrong idea, you were the idiot, you had no intention of accepting these strong feelings from him. You couldn’t do this to him anymore, it was horrible.

“Donatello!” You turned around, facing him. “I…I can’t date you anymore!” you said grabbing his arms. His face went from shock to sadness.

“Why…” he began, his voice quiet. “-would you say that? If you’re not satisfied with-“

“No!” you interrupted him. “It’s not that, I actually didn’t agree to dating you because I liked you-“

“(Y/n).”

“-or because I could grow to like you. I also didn’t do it to be nice-“

“(Y/n)!” He said a little louder, you stopped talking.

“You agreed to dating me because I’m your friend and it would’ve been annoying for you if I was constantly begging you to date me. You decided you would just do it, until I’m satisfied.” You blinked.

“How…”

“Yeah, duh, I already knew that, you know I’m a genius, right? Don’t underestimate my deduction skills. (Y/n), I just didn’t care. I wanted to make you mine through any means possible. So, I know all this so please-“ he looked at you with pleading eyes. “-don’t break up with me.”

“Donnie, I can’t give you anything.”

“I’m saying it’s fine, it’s enough for me to know that I’m the one closest to you.” Your stomach churned.

“Please, stay by my side.” He was wearing this unbearable expression of worry and sadness. It didn’t fit his character at all, his cockiness and narcissism gone. Because of you. You rushed to hug him.

“Okay Donnie, we won’t break up, I’ll try to fall for you, so please-“pulling back you took his face in your hands. “-don’t make that face.” He averted his eyes but kept a small smile.

“…kay.” He just said, looking at you again. He then leaned in closer, stopping a few inches from your face.

“Can I?” Your eyes widened, Donatello asked for permission. This is a whole new problem. You couldn’t really refuse him.

“Yes, but, slowly please, and no more than kissing.” You said closing your eyes. Donatello looked at you, face flushed, eyes closed, fully trusting him. If he could fall any harder for you, he would. Instead, he leaned in all the way, closing the gap. His lips were warm against yours. As he pulled away, both of you looked each other in the eyes, blushing.

-------

“I’ll try to fall for you” is what you said, but how does one even begin to try to fall in love with someone? You didn’t know, and the internet wasn’t giving you any answers either. You would just try harder, yeah, that sounded like a good plan. You were sat on a bench in the same park that Donatello so gracefully pulled you into the bushes that one night. It was getting dark, just like last time. You were waiting for him. He was supposed to meet you here, to have a coffee date. That’s one thing you started doing with him regularly, you met, talked for a bit and said goodbye with him asking for a kiss. Up until now everything was really easy.

“Hey.” Donatello was making his way to you and he plopped down on the bench.

“Hi, Donnie. I got your coffee right here.” You held the cup up, he grabbed it.

“Thanks.” You sat like that for a minute before you decided to lay your head on his shoulder. Donnie jumped slightly looking down at you. He didn’t move and the both of you lingered like that. But then you decided to grab his hand and hold it in yours. He then lightly shoved you off.

“What are you doing?” you asked him, but seeing his annoyed expression you shut up.

“Don’t force yourself, dummie, just because we are officially dating now, doesn’t mean we have to do couple things.” He tried to explain himself.

“No, but if you are serious about me, then I will be serious about dating you. I told you I would try my best!” You were irritated, it seemed that Donnie didn’t believe in you.

“That’s a nice gesture, but in actuality it is me who has to put in labor, you don’t have to do anything.”

You didn’t understand why he wanted to put work in all by himself, he almost never worked alone. His brothers almost always beside him. So why would he insist on it with you. He should trust that you’ll fall for him eventually.

“I don’t want to leave it all up to you.” You said. “Donnie, I want to fall in love with you, too.”

There was silence between you for a second before he spoke again.

“No way!”

“Why not?”

“Just sit there quietly and date me.”

“Donnie, don’t ignore my feelings!” When you said that he hesitated.

Donnie knew that it was impossible to force feelings, no matter how much work someone put into trying. And since he lacked any kind of confidence that you’d eventually fall for him too, of course he didn’t understand why you’d force yourself. You looked at him with sad eyes and started to mumble.

“Don’t you want to hold my hand?” He blushed at that and grumbled slightly, holding out his hand. You took it smiling and laid your head back on his shoulder. After a few minutes you spoke again.

“You were so adamant about the no couple-stuff. But is it possible you’re just embarrassed?” It was funny seeing him so flustered just to hold hands, since you two kissed before.

“You’ve got no self-preservation, (y/n). You do remember me jumping you? In this park to be exact.” You let out a huff. You grabbed his hand tighter to reassure him.

“Yeah, I remember, but you won’t do that again, because you promised.”

You two sat like that for some time, until both of you realized how late it was and decided to head home. After you stood up and said goodbye to each other his hand came up to your face, stopping before touching you and he made eye contact.

“May I kiss you?”

“You may.” You giggled. He smiled, his hand caressed your cheek and he leaning in for a quick kiss.

-------

You were standing in the kitchen, looking for some food when your phone started vibrating in your pocket. You leaned against the counter pulling it out. Donatellos name flashed on the screen. You put the phone up to your ear.

“Hey, Donnie, what’s up?” You weren’t expecting his call.

“Greetings, I was just wondering if you were doing anything tonight?” Donnies voice was excited, but you could tell he was trying to sound cool and collected.

“No. I didn’t plan anything. I was just about to make some food.” You answered, opening another cabinet, looking inside.

“Well, cease that action.” You closed the cabinet-door. “I wanted to ask you if you’d like to go for dinner at Run-of-the-Mill Pizza, just the two of us. If you want. Of course.” You smiled, that’s why he sounded so nervous.

“A date with Othello von Ryan. How could I say no to that.” You chuckled and heard a scoff on the other end of the line.

“Your insolence is high today I see.” You could hear the grin on his face. “I’m gonna be there in 10.”

As you expected, exactly 10 minutes after you hung up there was a knock on the door. You made your way out and walked with him for a few minutes before stepping into a dimly lit alley. You then stepped through the entry portal that was hidden behind a graffiti mural. You sat down in one of the booths and ordered a big pizza to share. While waiting you made small conversation, landing on the time he fought the purple dragons.

“-and then these buffoons stole all of my Tech to use for their evil doings!” Donnie was gesturing wildly, obviously still mad at the small club for using his Technology that way.

“I kind of get it, you know?” you said looking thoughtful. “Your Tech is really amazing!” You looked at him. “I mean, you built so much cool stuff in your Lab, even creating artificial intelligence.” He stared at you for a second then he sprouted a cocky grin.

“Are you hitting on me, (y/n)?” You blushed but then rolled your eyes.

“Okay, you know what, forget I said anything.” Crossing your arms you leaned back against the cushion, smiling.

“No, no, go on, I’d love to hear more about this cool stuff I create.” His arrogance skyrocketing. You tried to jab back.

“Don’t get cocky with me von Ryan!” you said leaning in, poking his chest with your finger. He let you push him back against the backrest. He looked at you through half lidden eyes.

“Sure, we better not start something you can’t finish.” He shrugged smugly.

“Oh, you little-“ you were about to say, but the waiter came to your table with your Pizza.

The rest of the date was really calm. After you had finished the food, Donnie took out his purple wallet and paid for the both of you. When you looked like you wanted to interject, he held up a hand, saying that he had invited you, so he would pay. You got up and he walked you back to your apartment. Standing in front of your door, you opened it, looking back at him.

“I had fun today.” You spoke. He looked at you with adoration. You started to redden under his intense gaze.

“Me too.” He averted his eyes then looking at the floor. You knew what he wanted to ask.

“You can kiss me goodbye, Donnie, we always do.” You said softly. His eyes met yours again and he smiled, coming closer, his hand coming up to the back of your neck, pulling you up very slowly and giving you the gentlest of kisses. You closed your eyes. When both of you pulled away Donnies face was flushed. He said goodbye and hurried away. You stood in the doorway for a minute trying to get your bearing. Something was wrong with your stomach, it felt like the Pizza inside you was doing pirouettes.

-------

“Come on…come on…Piece of-“ your hand came down on top of your TV, which at the moment only showed static. You really just wanted to wind down with your favorite show, but you stupid TV had foiled your plans. You had a rough day, your patience thin, you really didn’t need this right now. You groaned falling back, laying on the floor. You contemplated to just go to bed, but you weren’t tired at all and you really didn’t wanna miss an episode. You put your hands over your eyes, you knew who to call, and you knew that he would drop everything to help you.

You felt bad calling him over just to fix your TV, but you decided if he wasn’t busy saving New York, he could spend his time saving you.

Donatello was sitting next to your TV, with cables everywhere. He was making his in-absolute-concentration-face. You were just sitting next to him, having no idea what Donnie was doing. After about 5 minutes of him just pulling and re-plugging cables he took a step back admiring his work, looking satisfied.

“Alright, I found the problem, if this should happen again- which it should not, but- look, you just need to take this blue cable and connect it to this one, I rearranged them so it’d be easier for you.” You looked at the cables, it really was easier to see what belonged where. You were impressed. When Donnie connected the blue cable, the TV sprang back to live, your show coming on screen.

“Woah! Thank you so much Donnie!” you shouted. “You’re the best!” You jumped on him hugging him tightly. After a moment you realized his body had gone stiff as a board and you pulled back fast. Donnie was looking at you with wide eyes. You felt bad.

“Oh shit, Donnie, I touched you without both of us agreeing, I’m sorry.” Donnies eyes seemed to focus then and he shook his head.

“No, please.” He pulled you back into him, hugging you tighter. “It’s alright!” There was urgency in his voice. “You don’t have to ask. I was just shocked you initiated it.” He tried explaining. You put your arms up and around his neck. You stayed like this for a while, hugging while sitting on the floor.

You were pulled out of your moment together when Donatellos Wrist-gauntlet started to beep. Donnie groaned pulling away slightly and answered the call.

“Don, where are you, we have a mission, Bro!” you heard Mickeys voice. Donnie let go of you then and began walking towards the window.

“I’ll be right with you, I had to take care of something.” He then pressed something on the screen and the call ended. He turned to you.

“Got to go, see you later. Have fun watching your show.” You walked up to him.

“Thank again, bye and be careful.” You said, while leaning up. He immediately leaned down too and you kissed each other goodbye.

------

Donnie didn’t know what to do, he was dating you, but he wanted more. So much more… But you, being the nice person that you were, were just indulging him. You didn’t love him, he knew that, he didn’t know how to proceed.

He needed to talk to someone about it.

“Raph?” he walked into Raphaels room. “I need to talk to you about something.”

“Sure, Donnie, what’s up?” Raph sat on his bed, one leg hanging off.

“Do you remember when I said that me dating (y/n) was a joke?” he asked.

“Yeah?” Raph furrowed his brows.

“It wasn’t a joke.” Donnie looked to the floor. Raphs lip twitched.

“No way. Really. I never would have guessed.” Donnie looked up at his brother.

“But Raph, I want (y/n) to look only at me, is that weird?” he said sitting down next to him.

“No? I don’t think so.” He answered.

“So…is it normal to want to tie them up, lock them away, somewhere where no one can find them? And if someone finds them beat the crap out of that person for getting too close? I was told that those feelings are just possessiveness, not real love.” Raph listened intently, but seeing his brothers fearful expression, he had to smile.

“So why not do it?” He asked. Donnie looked puzzled. “Why not lock them up, beat others up?”

“No…Raph, they’d just get really sad and probably cry, so I’d rather see them smiling, than doing any of that stuff.” As Donnie finished saying that, Raph laughed.

“Brother, you have nothing to worry about, you’re fine. And listen, if they are dating you, they have to at least like you right?” Donnie stood up, walking to the door.

“Yeah, thanks, Raph!”

He went to his Room, laying on his own bed, his thoughts wandered to you again, like every minute of everyday it seemed. He decided to text you.

‘What are you doing?’ you read as you sat down on your bed. It was Donnie, you grinned.

‘Just got out of the shower.’ You wrote back. You sat your phone down but it immediately pinged again.

‘What a turn on.” You chuckled, to think Donnie would ever utter such words.

‘You must really like me, huh?’ You answered keeping the phone in your hand, expecting an immediate reply, but it didn’t come. You waited some more, deciding to get ready for bed. After an hour of him not replying you went to sleep.

You’re woken up by your phone pinging on your night table. You reached for it, reading the message.

‘I’m crazy about you.’

You felt your stomach flip and you smiled, realizing that, the smile vanished.

“What am I so happy for?” you didn’t know what to write back, so you just fell back asleep.

------

It was the perfect rainy and cold weather for a lazy day playing video games in the lair. It was your turn to play and you went against April. The others cheering. After April beat you embarrassingly hard you decided to just sit on the couch and watch, sitting between Leo and Donnie.

“Man, I really need to practice.” You grumbled.

“You’ll get there, April beats all of as at this game, except for Mickey.” Leo said, patting your shoulder reassuringly. You breathed out a laugh. When you looked to your other side you saw how Donnie was sitting, very straight, not one part of his body touching you. He had his eyebrows furrowed and when he saw you looking at him, he quickly averted his eyes.

“You good Bro?” Even Leo had noticed his brothers weirdness. Donnie began to sweat.

“Yeah! What? Yeah! I’m just sitting here, with my friends, my just-friends, my Bros…my Buddies.” He was avoiding any eye contact, looking at anything in the room but you two. He finished off his blabbering with pumping his fist against your shoulder. “Right, friend?” He forced a smile. Leo and you just stared at him. He was acting very weird and you had an idea why. You told him to hide your relationship in front of the others, but he was trying too hard. You needed to talk to him.

“Leo, would you excuse us, I need to talk to my friend, here.” Leo just nodded and followed you with his eyes as you walked out the room with Donnie. In the hallway you turned back to him.

“Donnie, what are you doing? I know I said hide our relationship in front of the other, but geez.” He looked at you with guilt in his eyes.

“I know, I’m sorry, I was just trying to disguise it as friendship, but I guess I overcompensated.” His arm came up to rub his neck. He was nervous. “I just want to be close to you all the time and it’s hard to hold back.”

“Listen, Don, we’ve been friends before all this ‘relationship’-stuff, so just act like normal, like my friend Donatello. You can touch me. I just meant no kissing and hugging and stuff.” You smiled trying to calm his nerves. His eyes began to lighten up.

“That’s good to know, I really didn’t know what to do.” He smiled sheepishly. You swung your arm around his and walked him back to the living room.

------

You walked into the lair not knowing what to expect, Donnie had texted you and had asked if you had time to come over. He had mentioned wanting to discuss something with you. You looked around the room not seeing anyone.

“Donnie?” you called out, hearing crashing and some curses, before Donnie came out of his Lab. You walked up to him and gave him a quick hug.

“So, what was it you wanted to discuss with me?” you asked following him to his room after he made the hand motion to come with him. He sat down on his bed and you did the same. He was fidgeting with his hands before looking at you.

“I want to ask for something, but if you don’t want to, it’s totally fine.” He said, his voice unsure. You just nodded so he continued.

“I know, I’ve been asking a lot of you, and I should be fine with what you give me, so feel free to decline, but I wanted to ask if you would like to…um, I-“ he began to stutter. You grabbed his hand to reassure him.

“It’s okay, Donnie, talk to me.” You smiled at him. He smiled back looking relieved.

“I’ve been craving your touch a lot lately and I thought maybe we could…cuddle?” you blinked, not saying anything for a few seconds. Donnie face turned nervous again.

“Ah, I knew it was too much to ask, forget I said anything.” He smiled at you giving your hand a squeeze. Your stomach whirled. Was it okay for you two to just snuggle? Couples do that all the time. And you weren’t really against it. Donnie, always against physical touch. It was funny how he totally threw that out the window with you. You felt kind of happy about that.

“Okay.” You just said. Donnie paused, confused, he never thought you’d actually agree to this.

“Are you sure?” No, you weren’t. If felt like you were overstepping some line and once you would cross it, there would be no turning back. But you ignored the feeling and took his other hand, so you were holding both.

“Yeah, let’s do it. Where do you want me?” you questioned him, and he looked at his bed.

“Uh, just lay down in front of me, I guess.” So, you did, you laid down on your side. He laid down behind you, his arms coming around your waist.

“Is this okay?” you felt his arm hoovering over your body, not yet touching you.

“Yes.” Your face started to heat up after he dropped his arm and snuggled close to you. His face at the back of your neck. You felt his breath on your skin. You suppressed a shudder. This felt nice, cozy even. You just laid there snuck against his plastron, breathing calmly. You closed your eyes. You could fall asleep like this. Warm and comfortable, this felt so natural to do with him, you were amazed.

You woke up, you were confused for a second, not knowing where you were, this wasn’t your room. But then you felt arms around you and you remembered. Donnie had asked you to cuddle. You had fallen asleep.

“You woke up.” Donnies soft voice came from behind you, he sounded like he was smiling. You rubbed your eyes.

“How long was I out?”

“About half an hour.”

“Oh.” You just said, in your tired state you snuggled closer to him. You heard his breath hitch. Then he loosened his grip on you.

“Thank you for this.” He spoke, very softly shaking your shoulder. “But my family will be here soon.”

You slowly opened your eyes again, sitting up. He was right, you did not want the others to see this. Why didn’t you want that again? You got up and stretched, then turning to face Donatello.

“I should go then.” You spoke quietly. He looked up at you.

“Yeah. Thanks again, for doing this.” You smiled at him bending down, giving him a quick peck.

“You’re welcome. Uh…see you later, right?” you asked timidly. Why were you so nervous all of a sudden.

“Yeah.” He answered with a woozy smile.

-------

You sat on your sofa, you were waiting for April, she had asked you to help her with something. Apparently, she snatched an interview with some boss from a company that she deemed ‘super-duper-suspicious’, and you had to come with her. You didn’t mind, it was a good distraction from all the Donnie-drama.

Then you heard a knock. April is early? But you realized the knocking didn’t come from the door, but the window. You walked up seeing Donnie hovering in font of your window. You opened it up.

“Donnie? What are you doing here?” you asked.

“What do you mean? It’s time for our coffee-date, like always?” he looked confused. Shit. He was right, you totally forgot to call off your meeting. You felt horrible.

“Oh, Donnie, I’m sorry, I have to help April, I forgot to tell you, I can’t today.” His expression became sad then.

“What about later, then? He asked. You thought for a minute, you didn’t know how long the interview would go on, but you were sure you’d be exhausted when you’d be back home.

“…No, sorry, I don’t think I can make it.”

“Oh.” You could tell he was disappointed, but trying not to show it. Your stomach sank, he was making that expression again, the one you couldn’t stand to look at.

“Well, I’ll see you later then and be careful.” He started to fly off, when you grabbed his arm.

“Ah- I just, don’t make that face, Donnie. Is there a way I can make you feel better?”

You wanted to make him feel better, you did. He had just asked for some kissing. But it had turned into a full on make out session. The way he was kissing you against the living room wall made you weak in the knees. He was too good at this.

“Donnie.” You whispered. Pulling back a little. “April is going to be here any minute.”

“Just a little more.” He answered, his face serious. “Are you okay with that?”

“Yeah…okay.” And he immediately leaned back down, kissing you again. His hands had taken your wrist and pushed them down next to your head. His grip on you was strong, you realized. It kind of hurt. Then you felt his tongue against your lips, you gasped surprised. His tongue then slid inside your mouth. It felt amazing and you whined against his lips. After you heard the noise you’d made, you started to freak out but you didn’t want to push him away either. You agreed to kissing him, but now your heart beat so fast and loud you heard it in your ears. You began to tear up. What was going on with you. Donatello pulled away then.

“I love you.” He huffed, but after realizing that you were crying, he withdrew his hands from you. Then he saw his Handprints on your skin, he took a step back from you, ashamed.

“No.” he said, his voice desperate. “I forced you again.”

“What? No, Donnie, we both agreed to this!” But he shook his head.

“Damn it, I want to treat you gently, it’s like I lose myself every time I touch you.” Donnie knew why you were crying. You grimace told the whole story of you wanting to return his feelings but couldn’t. He forced you into this relationship, and he was beginning to regret it. In that moment the back of your hand tapped his chest.

“I didn’t agree to kissing you, to make you feel bad, you know? Don’t get in your head.”

He looked like he wanted to say something but a knocking on the door had you both looking to the entrance. It was April. You ushered Donnie out of the Window.

“I’ll see you tomorrow.” You said, pecking his cheek, closing the window and opening the door.

-----

You laid in your bed with your face in the pillow. You had to organize your emotions and feelings. That was the task you wanted to achieve today.

You knew you liked Donnie, in the sense that his feelings were important enough to you to not ignore them. You also wanted to protect him. But you weren’t sure if that counts as romantic feelings. The fluttering in your stomach and your raised heartbeat could just be your nervousness.

This whole thing was taking a toll on you, even April commented on the dark rings under your eyes. You were worrying about returning Donnies feelings constantly, so much so that some nights you couldn’t sleep. Was it even possible to fall in love trough hard work, you’ve never heard of it.

“Shiiiiiiit.” You felt tears on your cheeks.

Maybe you could stop trying and let it come naturally, Donnie was smart, charismatic and for you he tried to be really considerate. But you wanted your love to come as fast as possible, to make him feel better, you didn’t want to cause him any more pain. But for that to work you’d have to fall for him, and you wanted to, but you’ve never been in love before and you didn’t know what to feel, this wasn’t like that kid in your kindergarten at all.

Wait.

You wanted to get you mind in order. You tried again.

If you’d confess your feelings for Donnie and he would recognize that your feelings weren’t real, he would make that awful face again, which scared you.

You did not want to hurt him, because he was important to you. You liked him. Yes, you did. If it’s romantic you weren’t sure, but you wanted to let him know these feelings that you had.

You wiped the tears from your eyes and began running, grabbing your jacket you made your way to the lair.

You excitedly climbing down the stairs. You wanted to tell Donatello about your feelings as fast as possible. You were almost all the way down, when your excitement caused you to lose footing and fall down. You hit the ground, but feeling no pain you looked down, seeing you fell onto Donnie himself. You got up, now sitting on top of him.

“Donnie!” you shouted. “Just the guy I wanted to see.” He groaned, holding his head.

“You need to be more careful when you climb the ladder, ow.” But you didn’t care about that at this moment.

“I have to tell you something!” you said eagerly. He just laid there, peering up at you.

“I want to tell you that I li-“ You were interrupted by Donnie pushing you off of him, when you got up again to ask him why he did that you saw his brothers coming in.

“They are gonna see.” Donnie whispered to you. You clenched your teeth. You were the one who told him that, you knew. But the rules were unimportant right now. His brothers came up to you.

“Hey guys.” Leo said. “What’re you doing on the floor?” You stopped to think, maybe confessing your feelings to Donnie in front of his brothers wasn’t such a good idea. You searched for an exit.

“We wanted to buy some coffee. You guys want anything?” you asked.

“Sure.” Raph spoke up. “I’ll get a-“ But you didn’t listen to the 3 boys telling you their order, you just looked at Donnie, he was eying you suspiciously.

“Yeah, yeah, okay, got it, we’ll be going then, won’t be long, buh-bye now!” you got up, pulling Donnie with you.

You two were walking the street toward the coffee-shop. Donnie looked at you from the side. He saw your dark circles under and the redness around your eyes. You had been crying again and now you wanted to tell him something. He had a bad feeling about this.

You came to a stop in front of the big store window and peeked inside. There were a lot of people. So many in fact, that you both decided you would go in alone to get the coffee, so people wouldn’t see Donatello. Which was okay for you, you could wait a few minutes before confessing to him.

As you waited in line you glanced outside. Donnie was leaning against a lamppost scrolling on his phone. You smiled. All of a sudden you felt a hand brush your butt. You froze, did you imagine that? Then you felt it again, this time the hand was slightly groping your ass. Instead of fighting back like you had thought your body would do in this situation, he betrayed you, completely freezing up. You thought of Donnie, but you couldn’t let him be seen. Shit. You were scared, terrified. This didn’t feel right, you tried to will your body to move. Your eyes started to burn and you blinked, feeling tears escape. When you heard the guy behind you pant, you lost it, you fought your stupor and rushed out of the building. You heard Donnie calling your name, but your mind was in fight or flight, and since you didn’t fight the guy, you ran.

It didn’t take long for Donnie to catch up to you. You still made it all the way to the park, where you and Donnie always drank your coffee. He pulled you back.

“(Y/n), Hey! What’s going on?” Your eyes darted in his direction unseeing. You were in a state of pure panic. Donatello understanding that, sprang into action. Pulling you down to sit on a bench he spoke to you in a calm voice.

“(y/n), you are currently having a panic attack.” He started. Rubbing circles on your back. “I want you to know that whatever scared you is no longer here, you are safe. I understand that you are frightened, but I need you to try and breathe.” He helped you by taking some inhales and exhales together with you. After a few minutes you had calmed down enough for him to get an explanation out of you.

“-and then I heard him pant behind me and I just ran away.” Donnie couldn’t believe what he had heard. He would search for the security camera footage, he would find that guy, he would hunt him down, and he would kill him for touching you. Seeing his plotting-face you gently touched his arm.

“Don’t do anything stupid, Donnie, I can’t see you when you’re in jail.” You laughed. But Donatello was confused.

“Why didn’t you call out to me. I could’ve helped you, you know? I would’ve stomped that guy into the ground for touching you.” You blinked at him.

“I couldn’t.”

“What do you mean by that?”

“Donnie, people would have seen you!” Donnie stared at you perplexed.

“Who cares about that while their being harassed?” You began to cry again.

“I DO! When he touched me, I thought about you, but I couldn’t risk you being exposed. And what if you hit him, the police would’ve been called, you’d be found out, you’d go to jail and it’d be all my fault.” You wailed. “When I realized that I stopped myself from calling out to you. You being uncovered, that’s even scarier.”

Donnie had listened to you intently. His hands were balled to fists.

“You know, ever since we started dating, all you have done is cry.” You looked down. He continued.

“I don’t understand it, it’s my first time after all. Loving someone this much. Wanting them all to myself. Wanting to cherish them. Wanting them to smile more. Wanting to change who I am for them.” He took a breath. “Earlier, if it were April or Sunita with you, you would have asked them to help, right?” He began to grin humorlessly. “I can’t even protect you, all I do is make you cry and force you into things and then wind up hurting you myself. I’m the worst.”

He got up from the bench then. You kept looking down.

“I’ll break up with you.” Your eyes widened. “For making you go out with me and for falling in love with you, I’m sorry.” Your brain didn’t compete what he had said. As he took his first step away from you, you heard voices coming closer. Leo, Mickey and Raph were making their way towards you.

“What are you doing here?” Donnie said, he really didn’t feel like talking with them at the moment.

“You told us it won’t be long, that was an hour ago!” Mickey said, worry in his tone. Right, you wanted to bring them all coffee, you totally forgot.

“There was an incident at the coffee-shop.” Donatello said. He looked down at you again, but you didn’t react to anything. He sighed.

“Let’s go home. (y/n) wants to be alone right now.” He ushered his brothers away, wanting you to have some time to yourself.

It all came crashing down on you. Donatello just dumped you, deciding to do that all on his own again. You wanted to go after him. But you hesitated. Maybe it was the best for both of you.

You bend over and laid your arms and head on your knees. Your eyes fell on a purple leather wallet on the floor. Wasn’t that Donatellos? You had seen it when he bought the Pizza. You picked it up and opened it. A piece of paper fell out. You reached for it folding it up. You read what was written on the little note, you breath hitched.

· don’t get mad when they talk to others.

· Hide that we’re dating

· Don’t touch them in front of the others

· Don’t touch them until we both agree

He wrote down the promises he made with you. The piece of paper looked worn and crumbled. It was proof that Donatello had read and reread and reread them over and over. You were sure that in moments where he didn’t know what to do, he vowed to at least hold these promises.

Your stomach fluttered and your heart beat faster. These two things happening a lot lately. You thought it was just nervousness, but you finally got it. It wasn’t nervousness at all.

Donatello, he’s an idiot, he’s narcissistic, he stubborn, he’s cocky, he’s arrogant, he’s a pain in the ass…But you didn’t want to lose him. Thoughts rushed inside your head. You were scared that whatever you were feeling wasn’t romantic, and when you thought about it, it wasn’t typical romance at all. The way you felt so comfortable with him and the way he would touch you making you weak. It wasn’t just a crush. What you were feeling for Donatello was love!

You got up wanting to run after him.

“Dona-“ you stumbled over your feet, falling down. You panicked.

“NOOO!” you screamed. Donnie turned around.

“I don’t care about protection and I don’t care about crying because of you, I don’t care, you make me feel safe, and you make me smile way more than you make me cry. Those are all part that I love about you!” You cried louder. He started racing in your direction.

“Don’t go!” he ran faster.

“Stay!” almost there.

“Stay by my side!” he finally reached you and he fell to his knees hugging you.

“I won’t leave, I’ll stay with you.” He panted. You hugged him tighter. Suddenly he stirred.

“Wait, you love me? Why didn’t you say anything?” He questioned you.

“I know, I just realized today! That’s what I wanted to talk to you about.” You pulled back a little. Seeing his troubled expression, you smiled softly. “I’m sorry I made you wait, Donnie.” He blushed hugging you again.

“Aww, isn’t this just cute.” You heard Raph say from further away. Donnie pulled back then, holding you by your shoulder an armlength away, rubbing his eyes.

“Shit, sorry.” He started to say but you interrupted him with crashing your lips on his. After you pulled back you looked at his flushed face.

“Forget about the stuff you got written down. Instead- never ever let me go again!” Donnie began to smile, then he held out his hand.

“Promise.” He said as you shook his hand.

#Donatello/reader #rise!donatello #rottmnt x reader

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piosplayhouse · 1 year

Note

oh my god. I'm sorry for sending all these asks lmao you never have to read or post them I just gotta. I connected my su she thoughts to the interaction in svsss that made me think them initially, so this is about Ming Fan, and not Su She. When Shen yuan is outside of the book, like us, it's fine to look at the cannon fodder characters and to know they are cannon fodder. characters are not people, they can't be mistreated like people, etc. but when he's IN the story, he stops (relatively gradually) interacting with the characters As characters and starts interacting with them as people. Not roles in a narrative, but complex, and with potentiality. (It takes him longer to do it with Lbh but that's something else). Characters, when viewed from the outside, by us, are cogs in a machine that we can project on and play with, but they are cogs and they are fixed. When viewed from the inside, they become moving, living creatures, with an unknown future, agentivity, etc. What Bothers Me Then, about Su She, and was highlighted by Shen Qingqiu having empathy for Ming Fan, is that often times, characters from within the narrative look at him (su she) like they're outside of it. They Know he's cannon fodder. They Know he can be punished without consequences, They Know he's never gonna be good for anything else and never had anything good to say. And they're right, and the story will reward them for knowing. This isn't about Su She or Ming Fan being complex or being more than just evil. (Ming Fan gets to veer of course precisely because that gaze on him changes, which I suppose might be the point of svsss). Su She can be garbage fire if the story requires it. He can be trash man. It's fine. It's about other characters within the same story treating him like they're the readers or the author, and Knowing that he's nothing but bad, or cannon fodder. You can know what's going on in your story, but your characters should not know what's going on in the real world (unless you're being subversive). There, I got it. Now I'm gonna leave your ask box alone, thank you for your patience lmaoo

I AM SO SORRY I DIDNT PUBLISH THIS EARLIER AHH ITS SO GOOD

Do not dare be ashamed of putting this in my askbox the meta girlies are gonna love this one i swear

Personally I think you brought up a lot of good points and really made me think about something I've never considered before. Imo where Ming Fan is positioned as canon fodder from a narrative standpoint, Su She takes on that role less out of necessity and more as a side effect of Wei Wuxian's idrc perspective on life-- wwx doesn't see Su She as canon fodder because he doesn't see him at all, he's neutral in wwx's story because he's non-existent in his memory. Where Ming Fan is static in that he's a trope, Su She is static in that he's sort of one of the classmates you had in high school that you might just barely be able to remember if you heard his name at a class reunion or something. Where your thoughts come in is how this intersects with fandom I think-- because there's all that blank space there, fans fill in the gaps with what they think Su She should be, which defaults more often than not to a character egregious enough to be justifiably disregarded by the main character. Obviously not saying Su She is intended to be good, but I do feel like there is like . An unconscious protagonism atmosphere that makes people eager to assign side characters tropey antagonistic or protagonistic roles in the main character's life that does permeate a lot of mdzs fandom. So full circle back to scum villain and Ming Fan becoming the school bully(tm) and only that of binghe's life! Hahaha this is so fun

Thank you for your thoughts as always wise anon 🥰♥️ everyone feel free to leave your comments as well but remember to be extra nice because I already fucked up posting this like a month after it was sent so we have to make it up to anon!!!!!!

#mdzs meta #svsss meta #long post #long posts #su she #ming fan

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mooodyblue · 2 years

Text

call me | 70s!elvis x fem!reader

summary: you and elvis meet at a time where he needs someone the most.

warnings: angst, gets nsfw at the end but not too crazy. mentions of pills, loneliness and idk it's kinda sad. sorry if i missed anything

word count: 3,029

note: written while listening to call me by kali uchis <3 i don't know why everything i write is always sad, maybe i'm portraying my own feelings on elvis. WHO KNOWS! i honestly wanted to write more to this but i needed to stop myself lol i skimmed through for errors so if i missed any, that's my bad. if i read my writing over again, im deleting it 🤷🏼 may contain inaccuracies. i write everything with the real elvis in mind but you could probably imagine aus!elvis if you wanted.

❤︎

elvis was grateful for everything in his life. he was happy to be able to make millions of people’s lives a little better by singing the music he loved.

but god, he was so lonely.

going back to his hotel room, show after show, it was tiring. he loved performing but coming back to a quiet room after hours of social interaction left him feeling empty. of course, he would occasionally bring a girl to his hotel room but that was never enough for him. the sex was always great, but sometimes he just wanted someone to talk to. the women who came to his room never cared about talking, they just wanted him.

he was having one of those nights. finishing up his final show of the month before flying back to memphis for a few weeks. he planned to leave in the morning so he could get a few hours of sleep before heading out.

you happened to be staying in the same hotel elvis was staying. seeing elvis was a dream come true. it had been an awful week for you but nothing was going to stop you from seeing him, that's for sure. it was a chance for you to forget the real world for a little bit.

oh, but of course something had to go wrong on this day. your stupid, little hotel key wasn’t working. that or the door was stuck.

“well, i sure hope you're not tryin’ to break in my hotel room.” a man said in a strong, accent that sounded awfully too familiar to you. he walked closer to you, taking his glasses off.

you looked up at him, then at the number on the hotel door. stupid, stupid, stupid. it was the wrong room. yours was next door. you had just tried to break into elvis presley’s hotel room. “oh….you're-i….i wasn’t-...it's not what it looks like-” you stammered.

he laughed and pat you on the shoulder. “darlin’, don't even worry about it. i can tell by the look on your face that you got the wrong room.”

“i’m so sorry, elvis. really! it's been a long week, i just wasn't paying attention.”

elvis shook his head,”don't apologize. d’ya need anything?” he asked. you were taken back by the question, even if it was a simple one. how do you even answer that question?

“i don't want to be a burden-”

“definitely not a burden. i can’t sleep after a show anyway.” he unlocked the door to his hotel room, “you did just try to break into my room, it's the least i can do.” he joked.

you wandered into his room, looking around. there were only a few clothing items hanging in the closet and the room seemed as if nobody was staying there, besides the various pill bottles you noticed on the side table. it did smell like him though, in a good way.

“i never leave my room when i’m tourin’ except to perform. that's why there's not much to look at, sorry if you're disappointed.” he chuckled. he placed his glasses on the dresser and slid his shoes off, setting them aside. “make yourself at home! i’m gonna shower and freshen up.” you nodded as you watched him make his way to the bathroom, shutting the door behind him.

you sat on the edge of his bed, still wondering why you were invited into his room. you've read about the girls he brings into his hotel rooms, there was no way that's why he invited you in. you loved elvis, you thought he was very handsome but you weren't that kind of girl. it was definitely tempting to snoop around his room but you had too much respect for the man to do that. his personal business was not yours.

he opened the bathroom door, glancing over to see if you were still there. you turned your head towards him, flashing a small smile at him as he ran a towel through his hair.

“have you just been sitting there? you haven't even taken your shoes off! i promise i don't bite!” he hung his towel up and made his way to pour himself and you a drink. “unless you want me to, of course.” he grinned.

“oh come on, you don't even know my name.” you giggled, slipping your shoes off. he handed you a drink and sat beside you.

“alright then, what's your name?” he asked.

“y/n.”

“lovely name, y/n.” he took a sip from his drink. “so, y/n….”

you turned your body slightly to look him in the eyes. “elvis…i-i hope you know i’m not that kind of girl…y’know that sleeps around. you're a very nice looking man but-”

his eyes widened at you, almost as if he was offended. “woah, wait a minute. who said anything about sleepin’ together?! i was just joking about the biting thing! you said you had a bad week, i thought you might wanna talk about it. is that why you think i invited you in here?” he exclaimed. “i’m not all about sex, y’know!”

ah–now you felt bad, you felt the heat from your cheeks turning red in embarrassment. “oh lord, i’m making a fool of myself tonight.” you muttered, drinking the entire glass he handed to you earlier. you don't even drink often and the liquid burned as it went down your throat but god, after tonight, you didn't care. “look, i’m sorry. apparently my big mouth continues to fail me.” you stood up. “can't keep a job, can't keep my relationships and apparently i can’t even talk to elvis presley!”

he pulled you back down onto the bed next to him. “let’s just start over, sound good?”

you nodded, apologizing again. “i’m sorry. i just–seeing you tonight was amazing. i lost my job last week, just got out of a awful relationship and all my friends have been avoiding me ever since. i was supposed to be here with my best friend but she won't talk to me so i had to come alone and to make things worse, i almost broke into your hotel room.” you sniffled. “i’m a disaster.”

“don't say that.” he frowned. “first of all, if you hadn't tried breaking in here, you wouldn't be talking to me. second, you're not a disaster, don't ever say that about yourself. one bad week doesn't determine your whole life.”

elvis stood up from the bed, walking over to the window showing the night sky over the city. he leaned against the wall, drink in hand while staring out. you couldn't help but stare at his tall figure, dressed in basic black pajamas with his hair still slightly damp from his shower. it was the most beautiful sight you've ever seen.

“i ain’t ever said this to anyone. but my heart is telling me to trust you.” he took a sip from his drink and continued to stare out the window. “do you know how many friends i’ve lost since….” he pointed outside. “all this? all these shows? all people ever want from me is money or expensive shit, nobody ever asks how i’m doin’” he stood there silent for a minute. “i finish a show, hop on a plane, do another show, sit in a hotel room by myself and just rot. that's all i do.”

“but the girls-”

he looked over at you. “the girls?” he scoffed. “gotta do something with all that adrenaline.”

you looked down at your hands, still holding the empty glass that was handed to you earlier. the urge to pour yourself another drink was strong, but you were too nervous to get up from the bed. who would have known that someone who has made such a huge impact in music, was struggling so much? it broke your heart listening to him tell you his troubles, you could tell he had been holding it in for so long.

you looked up at him again. “do you enjoy it?”

“enjoy what?”

“performing.”

he sat in a chair in the corner of the room facing her. he sighed. “i enjoy making people happy.” you stood up and made your way to the spot he was standing in near the window, crossing your arms and looking down at him.

“but are you happy?”

elvis had never really been asked that before. he didn’t know how to answer that question. to be honest, he wasn't unhappy. but he wasn't thrilled about how his life was going either. the colonel refused to let him leave the states, he was very much overworked and exhausted, but no matter how tired or how much pain he was in, he went on to perform a hell of a show for hundreds of people every night. seeing the fans happy is what brought him so much joy.

he sat there in silence, not looking at you, almost as if he was holding back tears. god, he was so overwhelmed. he didn't even know you and he was sitting here, opening up his more vulnerable side to you. “i don't know if i can answer that question.” he murmured.

crouching down in front of him, his tear-filled eyes glanced up at you. “can i hug you, elvis?” he nodded, reaching his breaking point and letting tears fall from his blue eyes. you sat on his thigh and wrapped your arms around his shoulders, giving an awkward, yet comforting side hug. it was nice. the smell of old spice and aftershave giving you a sense of peace.

“thank you.” he whispered. “i’ve been feelin’ so lost, so alone….i have nobody to talk to.”

“do you have a show tomorrow?” he shook his head. “‘m going back to memphis tomorrow.”

you got up from his lap and went over to the desk, reaching for a pen and ripping off part of a small hotel notepad to jot down your number. “if you need anything, and i mean anything…..i want you to call me. if you feel lonely or just need to escape for a bit, call me. i don't care what time it is or what day it is, please reach out to me.” you begged.

he smiled at you. “i may just take you up on that offer.”

a few days passed. there was no sign of elvis, you hadn't received any calls since you saw him that night. it was a little worrying. maybe he didn't like you or maybe he was embarrassed? you tried to not let it bother you.

you were back home in california, spending each day checking the papers for new job listings and trying to keep yourself busy. the only time the phone rang was when your so called best friend finally called you, apologizing and asking about the concert. there was no explanation for them ignoring you for so long so you didn't say a word about the night you had with elvis.

the day was dragging on, it was hot and musty outside and the neighbors upstairs were arguing for the third time that evening. you were sat on the couch staring at the ceiling as a movie played in the background when the phone range. you turned your head towards the phone, almost afraid to answer it. picking it up, you nervously held it to your ear. “..hello?”

“is this y/n?”

your eyes widened. it was him. “elvis?” you gasped.

you could hear a slight chuckle on the other end. “hi darlin’, sorry for not calling. once i got to here, i just slept and uh….” he cleared his throat. “i was embarrassed…about-y’know.”

“not embarrassed enough cause you decided to call me” you joked.

“well, you got me there.” he laughed. “i wasn't feelin’ all that great so, i thought i’d suck it up and finally give you a call. how are you doin’?”

the two of you caught up. it hadn't been that long since you first met but it felt much longer. you rambled on about your friends and not being able to find a job, he rambled on about the colonel booking more dates.

“why don't you come down to memphis?”

“oh elvis, i don't have that kind of money–”

“did you really think i was gonna make you buy your own ticket?” he interrupted. “i can get you on the next flight down here. i just really need to see you.”

you didn't pass up on that offer. the flight was that same night, he had even arranged someone to pick you up and bring you to graceland. none of this felt real to you. you both spent nearly every second together, outside and inside of his home. he opened up to you even more, expressing his feelings about his mom, the colonel and the many friends who used him throughout the years. you told him about your hometown, how you didn't have many friends growing up and the struggle of keeping a job. it was like that for a few weeks.

eventually, people were starting to question his relationship with you. it wouldn't be long before the colonel started getting involved, especially with the new vegas shows coming up.

one morning, you were greeted by jerry, one of the few friends elvis trusted. he gave you a slight smile, wishing you good morning and asking how you've been. “i’ve haven't seen him like that in years, y’know.” he said.

you looked at him, puzzled. “like what?”

“happy.” you opened your mouth to respond, but nothing came out. “and for once, it's not because of the pills.”

you didn't see him much that day due to him being off recording an album, but you stayed at graceland, thinking about what jerry had said to you earlier. there was no denying it, you had feelings for him and you were positive he felt the same towards you. there was the occasional flirting and hand holding, maybe a few friendly kisses here and there but nothing more. now, it was just a matter of when elvis would confess to you his true feelings.

he returned home later that night, lighting up when he saw you dozing off on the couch. you jolted awake upon hearing the door shut. “hi, doll.” he whispered. “sorry for wakin’ ya.” sitting up, you rubbed at your eyes and got up from the couch. “i didn't mean to fall asleep, how was your day?”

he shrugged. “the usual. ‘m just ready to sleep” he sighed.

you hummed, stretching and wincing at the slight cracks your bones made. “i’ll let you sleep then, see you in the morning?”

“actually,” he took your hands in his, “would you sleep with me tonight?” he asked. his hands were warm against yours, you felt your heart skip a beat. “okay.” you responded, not giving it a second thought.

he took you to his room upstairs, you had been in there several times already but it was different this time. you sat in his bed and waited for him to return from the bathroom as he washed up. looking around, you couldn't help but notice the small bottle of sleeping pills next to him. he had always complained to you about never being able to fall asleep, maybe he just wanted some company tonight.

you watched as he stepped out of the bathroom and into his bed, bracing yourself for the conversation you were about to have with him.

“i-i spoke to jerry this morning.” you mumbled. his eyebrows rose, “oh? was he sayin’ anything bad about me?” you let out a small laugh. “no, no. nothin’ like that.” you stretched your legs out, playing with the hem of his blanket. “he said you've been happy lately.”

“i see.” he rubbed the back of his neck. “he said it was because of me.” you blurted out. elvis’s face turned red, “ah…that man..” he muttered, covering his face with his hands.

you removed his hands away from his face, giggling at him. “c’mon, sweet boy.” his face turned even more red. “don't call me that!” he felt his heart flutter at the pet name.

despite the many love songs he sang almost everyday, it had been awhile since he felt this much love for someone. he was absolutely, madly in love with you despite only knowing you for just a few weeks. your presence filled that emptiness that had been lingering in his heart for so long.

he looked away from you in embarrassment. “you can be honest with me, it's okay.” you squeezed his knee. elvis turned his head back towards you, fiddling with his hands nervously.

“i like you a lot, y/n. you breaking into my hotel room-”

“that was an accident!” you yelled.

“damn, honey! lower your voice!” he yelled back. “i’m trying to confess to you, let me finish! ever since that night, i haven't been able to stop thinkin’ about you. you don't know how bad i needed someone like you in my life…..baby, it gets lonely. i don't feel like that when i’m with you.”

you cupped his face, staring into his eyes lovingly. “can i kiss you?” you asked, softly. “yes, please.”

you wrapped your arms around his neck, kissing his beautiful, soft lips that you adored so much. he tasted like mint from the toothpaste he used earlier mixed with your cherry chapstick and you wouldn't have it any other way.

you always imagined this day, but never once thought you'd ever get to kiss elvis presley. he always kissed fans during his shows. unfortunately, he missed you at the last show. but now you finally had your time and boy, was it worth the wait.

he pulled you onto his lap, deepening the kiss. you rolled your hips against his, forcing a small groan to escape his lips. the two of you continued for a few minutes till he pulled away, breathless and looking at you, pupils blown and with lust in his eyes. “baby, if we keep goin’, i’m not gonna last long.”

“mmm, i guess we'll have to find out, won't we?” you grinned.

#elvis x reader #elvis presley #elvis 2022 #elvis #elvis movie #elvis x y/n #ill post this on ao3 later #i cringed writing the last part idk how people write smut

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e-adlirez · 10 days

Text

Treasure Seekers 3 Review/Ramble

Welcome to the third and last entry of the Treasure Seekers trilogy :D

"Wait what?" I probably hear you ask. "What about the other four treasures they said the girls would find?"

And to that I say

yeah it do be a bit sad that they never made a book 4

But make no mistake, Legend of the Maze is a doozy of a third book, and I'd say it's almost on-par with book 1 if not surpassing it. Unfortunately there is no free digital copy of the book, so uh if you're down to spend a bit on a digital copy on the E-book site of your choosing or on a physical copy in a bookstore, I salute you for your determination.

As for the rest of you, you're just gonna have to trust me bro :] /j

Ready? Let's go :D (also this is being written by a sleep-deprived E running on hyperfixation juice so if you find any grammar issues feel free to let me know so I can fix them)

The story begins with the Thea Sisters touring the Capelletti House in Verona with their Italian friend/tour guide Sebastiano. Yes, this Verona.

So yeah Colette is fantasizing about Romeo and Juliet as a romantic ship, Vi is trying to kill her Santa by telling her that Romeo and Juliet are fictional characters (which Colette responds to with "oh hush I can dream"), and oop-- loose floorboard-- what's this package under the flo-- LE GAAASSSPPPP LANE LOOORRREEEEE

The girls fangirl about the ABL jumpscare a lil' too loudly and Sebastiano is a lil' confusion, soooooooo the squad goes out for some snacks outside the Capelletti house to explain stuff to Sebastiano

buckle up Sebastiano you're about to get two 300-page books worth of Lane Lore™

While listening to the story, it turns out that Sebastiano may or may not have heard a peep about a legend about a treasure called the Treasure of Eternal Love (adapted Scholastic name is "Treasure of True Love" which ew, snatches the original Italian name instead), which was said to have been owned by Juliet and tho a lotta people are trying to find it, they dunno where it is now. Sounds very Seven Treasures of the World to me :]

How does Sebastiano know a peep about this very obscure legend? Turns out he learned about it from a letter written by his great-grandpappy Jacopo, who was an archaeologist like Aurora :3

So Sebastiano invites the girls to dinner at his place so the girls can look for the letter. Vi don't get too comfy with the house library I know it looks very cool and antique but we got a goal and that is sifting through a lil' box of Jacopo's kept things and find some-- HOLY CRAP LANE LORE™

"Hi Jacopo, tysm for helping me with my research on the Treasure of Eternal Love, you're a real g my guy, regards from me and my sister Linda, also tysm for the tour of Verona."

-- ABL

The girls tell Sebastiano their findings over a dinner of bigoli al pomodoro, give some extra Lane Lore™ about Jan von Klawitz and Aurora's six sisters, and mention the possibility that Linda knows where the treasure is, which means that Luke is probably after it too, but also Linda might know where the treasure is, which means a lead >:3

First stop: Verona's city hall, where Sebastiano's friend Guido works and is able to help them with finding information about a Linda Lane who may or may not have lived in Verona approximately a century ago. They find a document that says yes, Linda did in fact live in Verona once, and also her address is listed there because legalities, y'know how it is.

So the girls head on over to the address, knock at the door, and are greeted by an old lady, and :0 turns out this old lady (her name is Mia) knew Linda personally.

Linda and Mia met when Linda was in her older years and Mia was a smol child. Mia would read for Linda since her eyesight deteriorated in her old age, and they hung out a lot together. When Linda left to return to England, she left the house to Mia, as well as a good chunk of the stuff she had in said house as mementos for Mia to remember her by.

Hey guys you wanna see a trick, it's called "the Lane Lore™ %", aka how fast can we get this old lady up to speed with the ABL drama-- /j

Unfortunately Mia doesn't really know anything about the treasures, but she does have this wack painting of a scenery in Japan that just won't align correctly no matter how much finagling you do to it-- oh there was an envelope inside-- LANE LORE™?

So the letter inside the envelope is a letter from Aurora to Linda basically Aurora telling Linda she found the Treasure of Eternal Love, but because Jan is on her tail, she left the treasure in the "House of the Sun" for now. Now, if you tried looking up "house of the sun", you'd get a hotel in Florida, a manga, a former Incan temple that's now a monastery-- you get the picture, it do be a weird detail and probably not it bro, besides Aurora's too much of a gremlin to be that obvious with her riddles.

At least if you're not a Shakespeare nerd like Colette is (the kind that never read past Romeo and Juliet's wedding), because if you were, you'd know that at one point Romeo equates Juliet to the sun rising in the east. Romeo is simping for Juliet, Juliet is the sun, ergo, the Capelletti house.

But uh, thing is we already went to the house and we already know that Aurora came back for the treasure and took it somewhere else. Sooooo might as well see what the last letter says--

"Hi so I'm on the run rn I can't chat for long because Jan is pissed and he wants to find me and force me to reveal the treasure, and I don't think I wanna know how not-kid-friendly this is gonna get if he does find me. Thanks for introducing me to your friend tho :D she's cool and thanks to her help, the treasure is safe and sound in the shade of the cherry trees! I'll come back for it one day, hopefully that day comes soon. Anyway, hugs and kisses, Linda." - ABL

Spoiler alert, despite having a beeg cherry tree on the painting, there was in fact nothing else hiding behind the painting.

LUKE TRANSITION

So Luke is doing Luke things, not touching grass as per usual. Cassidy comes by to give him a lil' souvenir from great-grandpappy Jan von Klawitz's house in London: Jan's old notes. Luke immediately dismisses Cassidy without even so much as a thank you -- Cassidy girlypop you're not scoring that man no matter what you do, he's the Adrien to your Marinette girlie we're only at book 3, you might as well accept your fate -- and Luke takes a lil' peek into Jan's notebook (he also calls his great-grandpappy "Jan", like just "Jan". I dunno maybe I'm just finding it weird because I'm Asian . .) for the goods.

And goods Luke does find, which he proceeds to consume like a goblin. Bit of Klawitz lore here:

"Grrr grrr stupid Aurora and her smartass tricks grrrrr who does she think she is grrrrr she beat me to the Treasure of Eternal Love in Verona grrrrrrrrrrrr well at least now I know how she works, I managed to find this friend of hers Jacopo, who definitely knows about the treasure even though he keeps playing stupid like I don't know that he knows Aurora. Something something cherry trees, I ransacked every single cherry tree in Verona and there was literally nothing, wth, Aurora why are you like this" - Jan von Klawitz

Luke responds to this seedy lore from his great-grandpappy with "hehehHEHEHAHAHAHAHAHAHH JAN YOU IDIOT, YOU COULDN'T SEE WHAT WAS RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU BECAUSE YOU UNDERESTIMATED THE LITTLE PILOT GIRL, I ALREADY KNOW WHERE TO LOOK"

Cut back to the girls, and they know where to look next, too

It's Japan, i-it's Japan, y'know Japan's relationship with their sakura/cherry blossoms

Turns out Linda has a friend named Kyoko Bianchi, a Japanese-Italian botanist who was raised in Japan. Since Aurora mentions in her letter that Linda's friend came in clutch, she was obviously referring to Kyoko and now the treasure is in Japan.

So Japan transition :D (based on my personal experience in Japan and also a bit of canon continuity consistency, I headcanon that despite being written in English, this segment of the story mostly had the girls speaking in Japanese, a language they would know how to speak a bit of at least (and apparently Vi is conversational in Japanese so c'mooonnnn).)

The girls land at Narita Airport and take a train to central Tokyo (damn Kumi from Cherry Blossom Adventure you came in clutch possibly teaching the girls how to Japanese subway offscreen because they actually didn't get lost using it on their own :D). Kyoko's hometown was Tokyo, so might as well start searching for her descendants/relatives there. First stop: Shibuya.

Colette is playfully ribbed a bit for having a big-ass bag while everyone else only brought smol backpacks around with them, the luck of the girls not getting lost using the Japanese subway must be balanced out so Paulina's GPS decides now is the right time to be a dick, Shibuya Crossing, and finally they make it to the hotel where Amrita Bianchi, their first Kyoko descendant candidate, is at.

And this is the first time the girls come across the concept of cosplaying, I genuinely don't know how they managed to sidestep it for so long especially since they've been to Japan before for a student exchange, all I can really justify it with is that university has been kicking their a-- RATSUNE MIKU??

Gahd even in 2018 Italy there was no escape from her /j

Anyway so Amrita didn't know Kyoko, so their second candidate is Shinobu Bianchi, a guy living in Shinjuku. They find him-- or more accurately run into him (literally) on his way to work, try to explain things to him but this man is running late, so he invites the girls to follow him to his workplace. They find themselves in a cafe on opening time, customers start filing in before the girls can even tell Shinobu what the whole deal is, soooooo karaoke break :D

Vi c'mon it's not like there's much else to do while waiting for Shinobu-- what're you gonna do, sit there and wait? A-actually y'know what that sounds like something Vi would happily do but c'mooonnn Vi where's your sense-a humor :D

Thirty minutes of singing later, they finally get five minutes to explain to Shinobu what they're looking for and Shinobu says "sorry I dunno Kyoko, I am half-Italian on my dad's side, but my mom has a different Japanese surname"

So the girls Peter William a bit emotionally, Pam goes to what Scholastic is telling me is a kiosk but might as well be a 7/11 based on the banger food Pam got from said kiosk, the girls take a taxi to a Capsule Hotel (judging from the illustration it looks like the Shinjuku Kuyakusho-mae Capsule Hotel), and after a bit of dinner, Peter William into their capsule rooms physically.

The next morning, Nicky goes out for a morning jog as usual (she prolly slept with her capsule open so she wouldn't get claustrophobic), and she finds a gardener tending to a Kyoko Bianchi flower :0 like no joke that's the name, it's a K. bianchi, named after a botanist who founded the Fairy Garden (Disclaimer: neither the K. bianchi nor the Fairy Garden Foundation in Japan exist, they're fictional bits for this fictional story and that's fine :3). Nicky gets the address for the Fairy Garden, runs back to the girls who are having breakfast, and they head on over to the venue.

At the Fairy Garden, the girls meet a gardener named Toshio who happily shows them around, and despite not knowing all the Lane Lore™ (yet), he knows enough to lead them to Kyoko's perfectly preserved office, where the late Bianchi has displayed some pictures from Verona, as well as her furniture and encyclopedia collection.

After a search, they find what was presumably a haiku alluding to Jomon Sugi and the writer's voice being hidden in there, and one jaunt to the record of Jomon Sugi in Kyoko's encyclopedia collection and uhp-- a hidden cassette tape inside the volume!

On one hand, victory, the girls have found a VHS tape that is implied to have a personal recording from Kyoko Bianchi herself, so they're super-close to the treasure now :D

But on the other hand, they found a VHS tape in the year of our lord 2018.

Good news, Toshio knows a buddy who's super tech-savvy, and that's including tech things. Bad news, he's in Kyoto, which is about 445 km/283 miles away from Tokyo.

So the girls quickly take a shinkansen and some bento boxes to Kyoto :D (their wallets are probably sobbing in an 86-USD ticket per person)

At Kyoto, meet Ren, are lowkey surprised that his house is a traditional Japanese house as opposed to a modern flat but hey it's a pleasant surprise, and Ren is able to play the tape for them.

In the tape, Kyoko explains the Treasure of Eternal Love, how it ended up in her hands at the ripe age of 20 through Linda and Aurora, and some Treasure of Eternal Love lore, or rather Ring of Eternal Love lore:

Yeah sure Romeo and Juliet were fictional characters, but reality, so it goes, isn't that much different. The Ring of Eternal Love was a courting gift from a suitor to a bachelorette of the Cappelletti household. The suitor and the girl's families had hate boners for each other for a while now, but instead of spiraling into a destructive mess of family feuding and death like in Shakespeare's play, they decided to call off the feud so the two lovers could be happy together. And now the ring, as Kyoko puts it, has been passed down from her to "one who shows love every day, in every way, towards everything that grows from the earth."

The girls are happy they got to see the tape and its contents, but they Peter William emotionally once more because well, they're back to square one now-- literally the only clue they have is the thing Kyoko said, and what is the thing Kyoko said? It's cryptic and weird and h a h ? Ren offers to accommodate them for the night, the girls get to sleep on futons for the first time since Secret of the Snow, and the next day they decide to have some downtime vacay-ing in Nijo Castle. A vacay that results in Vi having an epiphany about the riddle and thus who has the ring.

Meanwhile with Luke, he's planning something. Something that's got Cassidy in Japan and putting her master's degrees in Engineering, Chemistry and Computer Sciences to use by assembling a drone (I'm wondering how Cassidy has so little braincells out on the field despite having THREE MASTER'S DEGREES like holy crap--)

Cassidy tries complimenting Luke on the motherboard he sent in from Alaska and-- ew Omar why are you here I thought Luke fired you-- ooh what's that package thing-- oi don't diss on Japanese people being polite, once you see the ruder options you're gonna be pining for that shnit-- wait what how's this drone gonna find the Ring of Eternal Love--

Anyway the girls plus Toshio and Ren take the train back to Tokyo (istg if they took the shinkansen--) and back to the Fairy Garden Foundation, where they talk to the current head gardener: Mr. Murakami.

Mr. Murakami does in fact know Kyoko personally, and after a bit of persuading (it involves a bord like many good things in this world), he decides to bring them to his hometown Nara (which involves a train to Kyoto and then a train from Kyoto to Nara which on the Kodama plus the cheapest option from Kyoto to Nara is-- CHEESUS CRUST 91 USD PER PERSON AND THEY HAVE TO GO BACK TO TOKYO AFTER THIS???)

ANYWAY Mr. Murakami takes them to Nara Park, where he hid the treasure. He brings the girls to it, he checks the hiding place and

It's empty?

Wait, the hiding place is empty?

WAIT WHAT THE HIDING PLACE IS EM--

Off in Alaska, Luke is cackling in his fancy custom-made not-gamer chair.

Mr. Murakami is distraught, most of the girls stay to comfort him while Nicky and Ren scout out the area. In their search, Nicky and Ren find a big broken drone that seems to have crash-landed in the garden, and oop-- LVK logo. It was probably used to spy on Mr. Murakami to snatch the treasure. "DAAAMMMNNNN YOOOUUUU LUUUKKEEEE" Nicky probably would've shrieked at the top of her lungs if she weren't A. in Japan (it's very quiet generally), and B. within earshot of poor Mr. Murakami, who's still recovering from the horrible shock. The girls, Toshio and Ren take the drone to Kyoto while Mr. Murakami stays in Nara with the fam to recover because man, he deserves the break :(

In Ren's house in Kyoto, Paulina and Ren get to work hacking into the drone to snatch its data, and they find that the drone's memory goes as far back as to being in Alaska for some reason. Why would an LVK drone be in Alaska? Unless-- :OOOOO SECRET BASE??

With that lead, the girls depart for Anchorage, Alaska (if I plugged it into Google correctly the price for the flight totals out at a 567-USD one-way flight holy crap girlies have mercy on your wallets-- not including the mini shopping spree for winter clothes Colette was more than happy to drag the girls on). Ren gives Paulina a little flash drive with some written code that could come in clutch in whatever shenanigans they end up in in that secret base of Luke's. Yes Violet as much as I think you're the only person in the group who seems to be concerned for your wallet, ya'll are nawt surviving Alaska with those summer clothes ya'll are wearing.

Behold, a long rest/14-hour timeskip in the form of the last two letters the girls have yet to read from Aurora to Linda. (Well the girls besides Vi, God's sleepiest soldier over here is eeping in the back before the flight's even taken off--)

(These are the real letters this time around lmao, if you're confused, Aurora addresses Linda in these letters via her middle name Amaryllis.)

Dear Amaryllis,

I'm very sorry that, because of my job, you are taking on a responsibility that is perhaps too great, and that puts you at risk.

It's all because of the greed of my former professor, a mouse who is incapable of recognizing that beauty should be shared. My dear sister, I have thought about it for a long time, and I have come to the conclusion that the best solution is to take the Treasure of Eternal Love from Verona, where it is not safe... and put you at risk. I am sending you a copy of one of the photos I hold the most dear, in memory of the love that binds us. I hope it will help you make the best decision...

Yours, Aurora

Dear Amaryllis,

You wrote me that you are making a decision about the treasure. I agree that the mouse you're planning to entrust it to is worthy of that trust, and I will wait for more news. But you must be careful, even when you write to me, to not mention names or places. We need to watch out, because my former professor is more alert than ever.

It seems that he's building an underground shelter for his riches, designed as a kind of maze to test anyone who manages to enter it...

Professor Jan is clever, and he's always loved riddles, puzzles, and mysteries. I wouldn't wish for any mouse to find themselves in his maze!

Now I must say good-bye, my dear. Sending a big hug.

Yours, Aurora

Once the girls land in Anchorage, Alaska, they rent an SUV, pull out Google Maps, read some of the brochures Ren printed out for them just in case, fangirl over a moose (Nicky that's not something to fangirl about have you seen what they're capable of--), and accidental secret tunnel discovery?

Well, accidental secret garbage chute discovery, anyway, since the one thing that allows the girls to not break their ankles when landing is some garbage bags. Food waste garbage bags no less :D Ew :D

Some old aircraft bits are found too which is nice but it's never elaborated on whose old aircraft bits those were so we're moving on to the girls entering Luke's secret headquarters and Nicky trying not to die from claustrophobia :D

CCTVs pose an initial problem, but Ren's flash drive comes in clutch and allows Paulina to freeze the cameras so they can go in undetected (Ren how do you know how to program that is there something you wanna share to the class--). One lengthy labyrinth later, the girls manage to get out of the "we're walking in circles" loop-dee-loop they wound up in and find this little room with a little lit fire pit and an ominous riddle involving the "elements of nature". Pam has the idea of extinguishing the fire pit, and sure enough, inside the fire pit is a key that fits perfectly into the door across the room.

And right after Pam turns the lock on the door, a trapdoor opens up beneath her and she falls into the pit below. It's padded, it's kinda cozy, but it's way too deep for the girls to reach Pam from above without a rope or attempting to risk falling in and getting trapped as well. The girls are very reluctant to leave Pam, but Pam unfortunately only metaphorically slaps some sense into the girls and tells them to go on because they've gone too far to back out now so COMMIT TO THE BIT GODDAMMIT

(you guys like the rhyme-y bits? They're kinda fun to write I do like the rhyme-y bits a bit <:])

And thus the girls minus Pam go through the door to the next room, where there's this swimming pool with a key inside it, which Nicky swims down for, assuming that the trap in the room will only activate once they get the key into the door leading to the next room. Obviously she winds up being very incorrect, as the moment she takes the key from the bottom of the pool, the water starts to drain away until all you got left is a sopping wet Nicky in an empty pool and the key to the next room, which Nicky tosses over to Paulina while asking for her shoes and her dry clothes that they packed. Colette is devastated, devastated I tell you at the idea of leaving Nicky behind, on top of having to leave Pam behind, but Nicky's got faith that the girls will pull through and come back for her; so Colette, Paulina and Violet move on to the next room.

A LOT of walking down a twisting hallway later, the trio make it to the next room (which they use Nicky's key for), and we got four pots with something or other in them, lighting too dim to discern properly what's in the pots, a button sequence puzzle with no margin for error, and a wack riddle. Oh and Paulina's tablet's finally died after possibly uh, 18-ish hours of not charging it. RIP Paulina's tablet, that's gonna be set aside in the corner for the time being.

The pots turn out to have different types of sediment in them, and the wack riddle turns out to be the clue to the correct sequence to input, so the three figure that out fairly quickly and slide down the chute leading to the next room. Except for Paulina, who had to get her tablet from that corner she set it aside in, and wasn't able to make it to the trapdoor-chute in time before it closed on her face, leaving her trapped "forever", as the wack riddle states. The one time you're told to stop holding it, man, unbelievable. I'm never letting go of my tablet again /j

Now Vi and Colette find themselves in an empty room, and they only realize when they get down that Paulina wasn't able to make it out in time. Now this entire time, Colette has been going through it. Of the girls, Colette's been taking the whole leaving-my-friends-behind-for-the-greater-good thing not well at all, and it culminates in an emotional breakdown. Violet comforts her and reassures her that they'll get the ring, they'll pick up the other girls and they'll get outa here soon, but they gotta be brave now for the other girls. (Kinda hard to capture in short and sweet words what the emotion of the scene was but oh well). After a bit of calming down, Colette and Violet look around to find themselves in a... surprisingly simple room? There's a door on the other side of the room from them, and besides that there's literally nothing but thin air.

The two go to the door and move to open it. Yeah this one's surprisingly simple. Just walk on over, pull the door open, walk o-- a gust of wind slammed the door shut . .

Yeah that's right. You ever leave a window in your room open on a windy day and leave your door also open, and the wind going into the room slams the door shut? Yeah, it's that multiplied by uhhhh how much is a vent opposite the door opening up just to blow f%#ken WIMDY-level winds just to slam that metal door shut? However that much multiplies that. The two find themselves in a situation where had all five of them been there to do this puzzle, it would've been far easier; but it is doable with only two people. The plan is one of them wedges themself between the door and the frame and prop it open, while the other crawls under the first person's leg. Transitioning to the second person propping the door open for the first person is gonna be a bit dodgy, but it is doable kinda.

Now Colette has been going through the ringer emotionally, and if you've seen this trope before, you'd know that it'd be a real damn shame if they lost their emotional pillar and had to carry the entire plan on their own, riiiiggghhttt? She's been the handling this situation the worst (emotionally), and it would bring her a belly of the beast to trump all bellies of all beasts and force her to do a The Next Right Thing (hot take: Anna's arc in Frozen 2 was really good), presumably after a lot of sobbing in the corner! It's perfect for angst, and it's perfect for empowerment to see Colette pick herself up and be strong for the girls and save the day!

Which is why Colette doesn't end up being the last one standing :D

Colette was the one who propped the door open for Violet, who crawled through to the other side. The plan was to have Vi switch with Colette so Colette can get through, but one thing they didn't take into account was the fact that the vent would slowly create stronger and stronger winds the longer the door is held open for, so Colette winds up allowing herself to be trapped in the air room so Violet can do the thing. (Oh and the plan was Colette's idea too.)

Heeyyyy Viiiiiiii~ Do you have some cash left over in your wallet? Because I think it's time for you to put your money where your mouth is :DDD

So yeah Violet continues on alone.

Also if you're wondering where Luke is this entire time, he is in fact in his base, still not touching grass and none the wiser about the whole five lil' rat girls sneaking into his base because of the whole frozen cams situation. He does technically notice something's off, but he thinks that the clock in one of the cameras is broken and he ends up complaining about it to Cassidy, haha L. It is also at this point where we learn that the girls have been in Luke's base for a little over three hours at this point :D

Meanwhile, Violet goes down the narrow metal staircase in the hallway outside of the last room and finds herself reminding herself to stay calm but also inside Luke's treasure room, where treasures of all shapes and sizes reside. From whole dinosaur skeletons to ancient Egyptian statues to paintings to suits of armor and-- holy shnit Luke has the Ark of the Covenant in there too o o yeah this guy means business holy crap--

The Ring of Eternal Love is in there too, the lone treasure in the set of seven empty pedestals that Luke was prolly intending for the Seven Treasures of the World. So Vi, clearly not having watched Indiana Jones Raiders of the Lost Ark, attempts to lift the glass case protecting the ring, which sets off the alarms in the treasure rooms, and whoa holy crap there's a robot voice speaking through the alarms? WAIT WHAT DO YOU MEAN FIFTEEN MINUTES TO SELF-DESTRUCTION

Luke, having the shock of his life, comes down to the treasure room to see what's up, and of course it's one of the five brats who's been getting in the way of his endeavors. Hardly a surprise, really, those five have been a pain in the ass from minute one of Luke looking into the Seven Treasures-- from stopping him getting the Alabaster Garden (he didn't even get to see what it was smh), to duping him with the most audacious of gottems to exist only partially due to his goon's stupidity, and now sneaking into the heart of his base without him, his cameras, or his sensors noticing. Strange how there's only one of them, though.

Just like Aurora Beatrix Lane almost a hundred years prior, this young lady is naive, morally stubborn, and idealistic. She is preaching out about sharing these treasures to all, even when the worth of these treasures comes partly in the luxury of not everyone being able to enjoy them. There is value in that sense of rarity, and it's not like any of the uncaring, ignorant whelps working in the museums look at the pieces that sit before them and realize the true value that they have the privilege of looking at everyday. They wouldn't care about them-- they would do the bare minimum to these unique masterpieces and leave it at that. And this naive brat thinks that they are more loving, more caring to these pieces than Luke is?

But as naive and morally pretentious and... ignorant of time and place this woman is (did she really not hear the self-destruct alarm and is thus willing to babble to her grave?)... she is clearly very intelligent. She was able to affect the base's security system such that she could come in undetected. She was able to get past all four traps without getting trapped herself. It is strange how she is alone here, though. She is usually with four other girls-- ah, that's it. They got trapped, and she left them, so she could get to the treasures on her own. What a show of common sense, that is! She must've seen that the traps were designed such that risking oneself to rescue a trapped person is just not worth it, and that first point already makes her far more intelligent than Cassidy or her buffoons could ever be. It could even be on-par with Luke himself. What if... perhaps....

What if they worked together?

Luke, after a bit of back and forth with Violet, gives Violet an offer to ditch her friends and become his partner. If she accepts they can divide everything between each other in the vault, and together, they'll be able to uncover the treasures of the world and enjoy them all to themselves.

I mean of course Vi turns down the offer in favor of sticking with her friends but y'know what it was worth a shot, Luke, kudos to you for spotting a gemstone instead of covering it with mud and pretending it's not there.

Heavily disappointed by Vi turning him down for the sake of "the power of friendship" (I wish I was kidding)(Scholastic!Vi's (?) words not mine)(I would be incredibly disappointed too), he turns to leave her in the treasure room, and it's only then that Vi realizes she kinda effed up. Luke is the only guy here who knows the base inside-out, and thus would know a way to get the girls out so they can Not Die. And to add insult to injury, Luke made a bomb shelter out of his treasure room, so the entire base may explode and the girls might die, but the treasures are gonna be completely fine. Intact, even. Luke leaves, and the robot voice announces ten minutes before self-destruction.

As soon as she's able to, Vi calls the elevator, juggling anxiety and being able to think under pressure. She figures out that Luke oh so helpfully uses pictograms for his elevator buttons instead of numbers, and presses the button for the control room (the heliport floor is locked by a key). She arrives in the control room, eight minutes before self-destruction.

Just as Vi enters the control room, the cameras get kicked back into action, oh so conveniently showing to Violet a timer ticking down to the big kaboom in real time, and footage of Nicky waiting anxiously in the pool room (and Luke leaving), for extra stakes. One Perception check said "yeah, this is a LOT of buttons, TOO MANY BUTTONS", and the tablet sitting on the desk required a password, so oh god what do

Six minutes before self-destruction and one panic attack later, Vi manages to psyche herself up enough to roll for Investigation. She finds a button for disarming the traps, and that allows the girls to get outa the traps and meet up again in the treasure room. Happy reunions aside tho, four minutes to self-destruction

Turns out the girls (thankfully) didn't know about the self-destruct situation. No need to explain tho because Vi is deadlifting the group braincell like she's never done before. She drags them down to the base's... basement, where a train that was probably used to carry the treasures into the base sits unused and ready for the girls to figure out how to work. Three minutes before self-destruction, no pressure :D

Pam sits at the train's controls, Paulina tries to help but immediately brain crashes at the old-timey controls, thus deciding she'd rather help Nicky get the bars off the rails up ahead. Two minutes left, and Pam figures it out and is ready to-- wait they need electricity-- okay cool Nicky and Paulina are taking care of that, cool

Pam gets the train to start up, Nicky and Paulina manage to hop back into the train, and escape the base's explosion range with about ten seconds to spare :D

After stopping the train in a spot where their braincells could afford to deflate, the girls take a minute or two to breathe y'know, just take a minute to breathe, nibble on some wild raspberries growing in Denali National Park, before figuring out what the hell their next move is.

Vi suggests they tell the authorities about the whole secret-base-under-the-park situation and the treasure room and the stuff inside it (since Luke oh so foolishly gloated to Vi about the treasures being perfectly safe), on top of removing the train so it's not getting up in nature's business. They head back to the car talking about their adventure, get a bit sad that they weren't able to find the Ring of Eternal Love-- and oop just kidding, Vi pocketed it in the treasure room right after Luke dipped :D

So on top of the girls escaping with their lives, not only is Luke gonna lose the Ring of Eternal Love as quickly as he got it, he's also losing his entire treasure vault. Can I get a ripperooni

And that's Legend of the Maze :D

I would say that the hyperfixation-that-consumed-these-girls'-lives-for-a-whole-week energy is very strong in this one in the best way, and the girls' personalities are at their most showcased here. The banter is bantering, the girls' dynamics with each other is very believable here, Vi is carrying the group's braincell the entire time and she looks like she's a bit tired from carrying it but y'know wut she's still willing to carry it because it's honest work and she knows how important it is to have it :3 also her trying to kill Colette's "Romeo and Juliet are so romantic" Santa but failing miserably because Colette unashamedly likes believing in the power of love is hilarious

The main thing I wasn't sure about was.... all the infodumpy bits? The infodump goes a significant bit harder in this book than the previous ones (even more than Compass of the Stars, which is an achievement), and it's Scholastic-style infodumping, so you get the girls calling Luke an "evil mouse" or "selfish mouse" and I'm sitting here like "just call him sewer rat please ya'll had no problems calling him that before please for the love of god use that instead it sounds better--"

Don't even get me started with Amrita Bianchi explaining to the girls what cosplay is like she's the damn Merriam Webster dictionary--

Also the Japan segment with y'know Japanese culture and stuff had the terms localized for some reason??? Like haori became "dark jacket", kimono became "long, elegant Japanese dress", they didn't even mention Ren's hakama (he was wearing a very traditional Japanese look), they felt the need to explain bento boxes as "typical Japanese portable lunch boxes" even though "Japanese lunch box" probably would've gotten the point across just fine and also there was an illustration of the bento boxes, Japanese characters became "logograms" for some reason, and dango became "rice dumplings" which became infinitely more confusing for me because the illustration made it look like takoyaki--

I could go on and on but yeah, there are a lot of these and it felt very infodump-y to me. I'm hoping it's just a translation thing, because the story overall feels pretty solid. Scholastic, what happened to the asterisks? Were they just too much for one page? I feel like you would've been able to squeeze them in just fine to make the reading experience a little smoother,,, just like, so it's an optional thing for the reader to read the mini-infodump of the term if they dunno what it means,,,

Other than that tho I don't think I have much to complain ab--

COUGHS GAGS SCREAMS CRIES WRITHES ON THE FLOOR

(I have the magic-of-friendship-invocation tolerance of an angsty teen I'm sorry :'3)

Scholastic, buddy chum pal buddy chum buddy chum pal,,,,

You could've had Vi say "the only way I got here was thanks to my friends", and it would've been fine and infinitely better-sounding and probably more in-character,,, o<-<

Gahd I hate it when Vi's used as the power of friendship prophet -m-

There's a more minor one as the girls are going back to the car and Vi is telling the girls about the deal Luke offered her, and the girls ask her what she said, and she says "I told him I already had the greatest treasure in the world... true friendship!"

Meanwhile I'm sitting there like "MMMMMGGGGGGHHHHHH 'friends like you' or 'sisters like you' or 'my friendship with you' would've sounded better -m-"

(Also the girls call each other like "friends", so like "you were in fact right, friends", which is like, what happened to "sisters" or "girls" those work perfectly fine and get the girls' close relationship across significantly better than "just friends")

Most of what I'm saying here tho are just nitpicks and probably (hopefully) are just stuff with the English translation-- in all seriousness, the book is pretty good.

Aurora's trail here makes sense and is rather logical, and the interesting thing I find about it is that it feels different from the previous two books' worth of shenanigans. Aurora in this one had far less veers and nation hopping shenanigans, and I feel that it was perhaps intentional. Perhaps to give off finale vibes-- Aurora works far more closely with her sister in this one, and the main thing the girls had to work with was not Aurora's diaries, but the letter she wrote to Linda when they were discussing the Ring of Eternal Love. Something about it feels closer, more intimate, more tragic than the previous ones. I felt the need to put her last to letters in the book verbatim because they were emotional dammit -m- Damn you British Amelia Earhart you've done it again /lhj

Luke's character I think is the strongest here. He gives off in a way the most... normal? Vibes here? He's still not touching grass and muttering to himself ominously a whole lot, but his mindset is nice and easy to wrap your head around here. He literally doesn't care about his goons unless he needs something from them, he is more than happy to overanalyze the crap out of a piece of text if he feels Cassidy didn't look through it thoroughly enough, and he wants what he wants right away, and that includes the things he needs to get the thing he actually wants. He as a character literally observes everything happen from his base in Alaska and backseat gamers the crap out of his goons if he sees something they didn't, or if they fumbled the bag and it was perfectly avoidable had it not been for SM being SM--

Also his blatant disrespect for his great-grandpappy Jan is holy crap haha-- it might just be my cultural background, but when I saw Luke call his great-grandpa "Jan" and then say "you disappoint me, Jan", I was flabbergasted haha, not a criticism I just wanted to mention it because I thought it was funny

I really like the fact that Stan and Max (aka SM) didn't show up at all in this book. It would've been easy to have them show up for regularly scheduled hijinks, but in Luke's mind, none of SM's operations have ever been... up to Luke's standards. Especially with how much of a ruckus they tended to make with their presence, they were more of a liability to Luke than an asset; therefore Luke changing up his strategy to be as hands-off and clean and non-intrusive as possible feels like something he'd do, what with how laser-focused he is on min-maxing efficiency to get what he wants as soon as possible.

Omar still being there despite being "fired" might just be a Scholastic oopsie so I can forgive it, Cassidy is still simping for Luke and trying to impress this man and trying to prove she's at an equal level to him, but every time nah. Just nah. Girlie you think you're on the same level as him, which can't possibly be further than the truth. I haven't seen Miraculous Ladybug, but I'd bet Cassidy has even less of a chance of impressing Luke, than Marinette had a chance at getting Adrien to see her as more than "just a friend" before they finally got together.

Now here's something I've been wanting to ramble about for a while: Violet being left alone instead of Colette. It's actually pretty clever when you think about it: Colette is the closest the girls have to a heart (tho she plays hot potato with Paulina when it comes to that role imo), so she's been the most emotional and the most sentimental of the group this entire time. From daydreaming about Romeo, to wanting to believe in love, to happily picking up a microphone to sing karaoke with the girls, to her strong reactions to having to leave the girls behind one by one for the sake of their mission, Colette was being set up for a moment where she is the one who is left alone. You see it a lot in media: the main character is the most sentimental one and as their friend squad make their way to the Big Bad Evil Guy, the supporting characters are forced to get left behind one by one to either hold the evil minions back or because there's no way for the character to move forward with the MC; so the MC is forced to go through the five stages of grief knowing that their friends trust them to get the job they'd set out to do done. It literally happened in Geronimo's third Kingdom of Fantasy book Amazing Voyage, and in that one Geronimo was the one who desperately didn't want to be alone, but he wound up carrying on alone anyway. You see this kinda thing everywhere.

However, in this bit, it makes total sense that Violet is the one who ends up carrying the last leg of the journey alone instead of Colette. Compared to Colette (and honestly the rest of the girls), Violet is the most level-headed. She's the girls' braincell keeper (in this trilogy), the babysitter holding the leash tied to the four gremlins, the one keeping everyone on track and also making sure that the group's collective ADHD doesn't spiral down as badly as it could possibly be. Whenever the girls make a big move that could affect the whole group, Vi is the one asking if it's a good idea or if it's worth doing, and she's the one thinking ahead enough to say "if x happens instead of y, what then?" You get the idea-- Vi is the most capable of keeping herself level-headed even when she's under all this pressure, and she's good at analyzing and planning on account of her often taking the position of the quiet observer.

With this context, it sort've makes you wonder what was going through Colette's head when she offered to help Violet get out of the air room. Violet and Colette in particular get paired together fairly often, and it's probably because of how well they're able to understand each other-- so with the plan, was Colette volunteering herself to prop the door open out of "it was my idea" courtesy, or was she thinking that maybe Violet would be able to figure things out better and thus needed to get to the other side? She probably was expecting to get to the other side with Vi, but would she have thought far enough ahead to a what-if where that wasn't possible? :3c

And Scholastic and power-of-friendship funkiness aside, Violet did handle the situation well, all things considered. The one bit where she only realized Luke was hers and the girls' only ticket out of there was a bit weird, but it can be chalked up to her not being able to take that into account in the moment because of a mix of stress, sheer bafflement from Luke's deal, and the fact that when put on the spot, observers don't exactly handle taking the driver's seat that well :'D (speaking as an observer myself here)

It makes me wonder a bit if Violet and Luke were meant to be foils of each other, what with how similar they are to each other (both of them being observers and planners who delegate more often than they do the work themselves), yet different enough that the contrast between the two is striking. Said difference being

Violet touches grass. Luke does not :)

Anyway so yeah, that's Treasure Seekers 3, and while it is kinda sad that this is where Treasure Seekers ends, y'know what? It gave a solid show as the last installment in the trilogy. I liked it, I liked the canon compliant blorbo angst, I liked the characters character-ing when the dialogue was letting them breathe :]

And of course, we can't forget

God's sleepiest soldier <3

She deserves that nap after what she went through and you know it--

#geronimo stilton #thea stilton #thea sisters #violet conked out the moment she got into the suv and the girls drove off to plan stuff out. change my mind /j #there's a bit where nicky fangirls upon seeing a moose like she suddenly turned ten and like #she inched closer to the window to see it better but violet was like “hey you're squishing me”#and nicky was like “sorry vi.. i got a bit excited.... y'know how much i love nature”#and vi in this moment where she gave straight-up the most mom vibes #was like “here let's swap seats"#like UEUEUEUEUWAAAAA....#also like remember the bit where colette wound up lugging a big-ass bag around with her while the girls had smoller backpacks #well surprisingly it backfired but not in the way you'd think #the rest of the girls were basically stuck wearing the same clothes the entire time #meanwhile colette was happily not having to deal with wearing clothes that weren't accumulating sweat from having to walk around #if not y'know because of japan's heat #i wrote this while i was sleep deprived so maybe i missed more than a few things in this review that i wanted to say because forgor #maybe i'll end up editing stuff in here a bit after like #i'm more awake #but yeah <3 #if the infodumpy bits and dialogue quirks are the same in italian i will cry /hj #*psst hey angst lovers wait for my next post i got something for you*#wait for like #when i wake up and hopefully actually get to sleep tonight lmao #before i go consider #alternate scenarios where any of the other girls end up in that same situation with luke #i'll leave those ingredients on the counter. take them and use them however you wish :3 #book rambles #book rant #book review #rambles

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swiftlymoniquesblog · 8 months

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Fandom Leap - Chapter 5

A/N: Hi friends! I am back with a submission to a collab project with @supraveng and other friends! I am so honored to be apart of this story and hearing other people’s writing style has been so fun! I hope my part keeps everyone interested! Readers thoughts are in italics!

Word Count: 2,618

Pairing: Dean Winchester/Sam Winchester x Reader (no incest!)

Warnings: love triangle, kissing, fluff, tiny bit of angst

Series Masterlist

Chapter 4

“Before you could respond that feeling came over you again, you hadn’t even had a chance to warn Claire or live in this glamorous life for an entire day before feeling the chill running through you and knowing you weren’t going to be able to get back here anything soon.”

When you wake up again after your jump, your head hurts worse than it ever had before. You try standing up but feeling dizzy and decide to just stay on the ground until you get your strength up enough to move again. The world around you had been spinning out of control and the only relief is closing your eyes tightly, praying to anyone who would listen that the dizzying feeling would just stop. For fear of the situation only growing, your eyes are still closed tight but a new feeling made itself known. It seemed that someone had wrapped their arms around under your shoulders and then under your knees, you felt the ground from under you disappear; someone picked you up. There was silence around you but as you curled in closer to whomever held you, the smell of old cigarette smoke and whiskey tickled your nose; it was familiar.

Time passed and you woke up again, this time the dizzy feeling went away. Your eyes slowly open and you immediately recognize where you were. Jumping out of bed, you bound down the hallway and into the room you remembered from the last time you were there and the sight in front of you, made you super proud.

“Hey sweetheart,” Dean said when his eyes made contact with yours again. Rushing over you fall into Dean’s arms as he hugs you after not seeing you since the last jump

“Dean I literally thought I was never gonna see you again.”

“Yeah I know what You mean sweetheart I didn’t think we were ever gonna see you again.”

“Wait a minute where is Sam?” Just as you ask where he was the sound of the door opening to the bunker and footsteps coming down the stairs indicated that Sam had been coming home. Little did you or Dean know that he had been spending all of his time researching where you had gone to and how he could get you back.

“(Y/N) you’re back.”

“Hi Sam.”

“When did you come back?”

“Just now.”

“Are you OK? What happened, how did you come back?

“Really Sammy she's been gone for three months and all you can say is how is she back?” Dean pipes in

“What’s wrong with asking that?”

“Dude you clearly don’t get it.”

“Don’t get what Dean?” The two brothers were bickering back and forth to each other like they were kids again so you stepped to the side and let them talk.

“Doesn't matter how she got here it's just the fact that she's back that is what should matter to you!” Dean said.

“Well obviously I’m glad she’s back but it doesn't make any sense how can she jump from one round to another and be OK!”

“About that, I’m actually not OK.” You spoke up.

“What do you mean you're not OK?” Sam asked.

“I passed out and I don’t know where I ended up but I guess Dean found me picked me up and brought me back here. I was extremely dizzy and I just couldn’t move and the next thing I knew I woke up and I was here.

“Where did you find her?” Sam asked.

“She was about 40 feet away from the bunker it seemed however when she ended up jumping she tried to come back here somehow.”

“But that doesn’t make any sense.” Sam questions.

“What is with you and things making sense?! Look she came from another realm, another universe, met other people but now she's back can you just for once appreciate that she's here.” Dean asked can I get a little more infuriated with his brother.

“(Y/N) welcome back” and with that Sam left the room.

“What’s his problem? What happened when I left?”

“Sam took it kind of hard.” Dean explained.

“What do you mean?”

“Well Sam got a little crazy. He did everything he could to try to bring you back on his own but see what he doesn't realize is that you have absolutely no control of coming and going as you please. You just up and leave but to him there has to be some kind of scientific proof for it to make any sense. Me on the other hand I’m OK with it! I mean you come and go as you wish sweetheart I don’t care. I mean as long as I don’t end up feeling anything or you know anything happens between us then you know it’s cool.

“Wait what do you mean anything happening between us?”

“OK I’m not gonna lie when we first met might have sort of thought you were attractive, I don’t know but, I thought it was ridiculous being attracted to a girl who has absolutely no control of when she can or can’t be someone I mean am I right.”

“Well first of all thank you. I, of course, find you very attractive. I mean you should see what my room looks like in my universe. Your face and Sam’s face are everywhere but that’s another story though. Secondly I appreciate what you’re saying and I agree I don’t wanna start anything with anybody if I can’t stay in one place. Until I figure out how to control this dating is just not an answer for me.”

“Alright that’s fair. I get it but do you mind if I do something?”

“What do you have in mind?”

“Well you know I thought maybe I could go kiss you or something, just to get it out of my system?”

“Man, everyone wants to kiss me” You say to yourself.

“What was that?”

Oh nothing, nothing um, I mean I guess so?”

“Well geez if I’m gonna kiss somebody they’re usually a little more excited about it.”

“No, no, I, I am, it’s just I don’t know wouldn’t it be kind of weird?”

“Me? Weird? Come on sweetheart that's not fair.”

“No, no, I mean it’s nothing against you. I mean like you said I have no control of when I’m gonna leave next and like you were saying I don’t wanna give you feelings and then just take it all away because I believe I mean”. And before you were able to finish that sentence the soft feeling of Dean’s lips were on yours immediately shutting you up.

You could tell just by that one kiss how long he had been wanting to kiss you, not that you knew him or Sam for very long to begin with but you knew there was something else there. After a few minutes had gone by Dean had let you breathe you decided to leave the room and try to downplay however you were feeling

“Well on that note I- I-I guess I’m gonna go and see what I can I-I can do for somebody else I-I don’t know I just have to go. Bye.”

You groan to yourself as you walk out the door and hear Dean laugh at you as you scurried away, hoping desperately that he would forget your awkwardness. Walking around the bunker you try to familiarize yourself with where you were based off of what you've seen on television

So if memory serves me correctly this should be Sam’s room. Slowly walking up to the door, you hesitate a moment before you realize that maybe what you're doing is a little bit crazy. Sam did seem like he was less than enthused to have you back after the way you left so abruptly the first time but he owed an explanation to you why he acted so weird when you came back. Dean was more than happy to see you but what was up with Sam? Slowly bringing your knuckle up to the door you tap on it three times, instantly regretting that you even came up here.

“I’m not in the mood Dean go away,” Sam's muffles voice could be heard from the other side.

“It’s me Sam,” you said just loud enough for him to hear you. Just then the door quickly opens and he appeared surprised to have you standing at his door.

“(Y/N) what are you doing here?

“The better question is why did you act so weird when I came back?” you counter.

“I was afraid you were gonna ask me that.”

“Afraid? Why were you afraid?

“Here why don’t you sit down,” Sam stepped aside and let you walk in before motioning for you to sit on the bed.

“OK look I acted weird when you came back because I wasn’t expecting to see you.”

“Well obviously I didn’t think I was coming back here either but I am here so why does it bother you so much?”

“It doesn’t bother me that you’re back. I’m just surprised taken back or whatever you wanna call it.”

“Yeah I get that you made that really clear but why?” You grew more frustrated with him.

“Since you left I drove myself crazy trying to figure out how we could get you back anytime we wanted.”

“I know Dean told me but why would you do that?”

“Well because I uh,” Sam seemed like he was trying to hide something from you.

“Come on Sam just say it.”

“Look I know it was only for a couple of days since you were here and we really don't know each other but I did start feeling something.”

“Oh no, not you too,” you say aloud.

“Wait what?” Sam was confused by this.

“Dean literally said the same thing to me about 20 minutes ago.”

“Wait so you're saying that Dean confessed to having feelings for you?”

“Yup,” you said nodding your head.

“Oh well that’s just great.” Sam said.

“He even kissed me too.” To say that Sam was disappointed was an understatement but he couldn't say anything, Dean had got to you first.

“I see um, OK then cool. So do you like him too?”

“I mean yeah, he's really cool actually and very cute?”

“Why does that sound more like a question?” Sam had asked

“Well because like I told him until I get this jumping thing under control I don’t think it’s fair that I have feelings for anybody. Dating would just be really, really hard because I never know when I’m gonna jump into another universe and who else I’m gonna meet. Besides I don’t wanna play with your feelings like that and then Dean’s feelings too; that’s not fair to you guys.”

“I mean I can see your point but Dean and I are grown men; we can make decisions for ourselves and whether we think it's good for us or not. I appreciate your concern but I’ll be OK.” Sam said, growing more confident in himself.

“Well that’s good to know but again, I just wouldn’t feel right about leading either one of you on when I never know if I’m staying.”

“Yeah I guess that’s true. It is kind of unfortunate though.”

“Why do you say that?” Curiosity began to taunt you.

“Well I don’t know, I think I came up with a couple of dates I thought would be kind of cool to take you on.”

“Oh really, and what would those have been?”

Sam chuckled a little nervously kind of shy about sharing the side of him usually doesn't let anybody see him to be a romantic type but when it came out he did like showing it. His cheeks tinted with pink.

“Well to start I think what I would do is we would go into town find the closest restaurant that set on the water sit across from each other and order the most expensive food that we could find on the menu.”

“Jeez wouldn’t that be expensive.”

“No but I can cover it you’re worth that.”

“OK so after we ordered all this food what would we do next?”

“Well after we finished eating and enjoying different conversation I would order a dessert.”

“You? A dessert man? I always thought you were the healthier one with all those salads you tend to eat.”

Sam laughed shaking his head a little bit

“Well yeah but in this case let’s just go with the dessert.”

“OK what kind of dessert?”

“It would be ladies choice so whichever you’re feeling we can go ahead and order as long as it’s not any kind of pie because I am sick of pie I mean you try and live with Dean.”

At that point you were both laughing knowing just how much the man loved his pie.

“OK,OK so after dessert what's next?”

“So I thought we would walk down the water line.”

“That sounds like it could be fun or a little bit messy.”

“What do you mean messy?

“If we’re gonna be at the water I’m gonna wanna take off my shoes and depending on if it rained or not there might be mud.”

“OK now you're really thinking too much into this.”

“Hey you said that you thought a lot about this, let me bring my thoughts into it too!”

“OK fair enough so we're walking along the water and we're holding hands just as the sun slowly begins to sink behind the horizon. The sky is this beautiful orange and pink little bit of purple in there as well but then I turn and I look to you I stop and I smile at you, not being able to realize just how lucky I am that someone as beautiful as you agreed to do something like this with me. In my past as a hunter, I never thought in a million years that I would be able to find somebody that I could just be myself with. I know I said we’ve only known each other for a few days but there's something about you and I can’t help but think of that maybe there could be a future between us. I don’t know it might be kind of crazy for me to think about it like this but in my line of work with how many times I’ve almost been killed or I have been killed and I’ve been brought back to life, it’s a chance I have to be willing to take.

Then Sam looked over to you as he finished his thought and you smile to yourself. And in that very moment, you grab his face and bring him to your lips. He immediately responds, grabbing your hips and holding you close to him. He growled a bit, almost animal like, as he took control and gave all his feelings to that kiss. Like he was afraid of losing you for good.

“No one has ever said anything like that to me before,” you say when you separate from him.

“You deserve to be reminded of that every day for the rest of your life” Sam says with his forehead against yours.

You sigh as you soak in this moment, this feeling in your heart, the smell of Sam and the feeling of his hands gripping onto your hips. Just as quickly as all of those feelings went through you, they all went away and that eerie familiar feeling rose up on your throat.

No, not now. Please, not now! And before your head could wrap around what was going on, you were torn away from Sam but his presence still lingered on your skin.

#supernatural #sam winchester x y/n #sam winchester #supernatural family #sam girls #dean girls #dean winchester #collab #sam and dean #dean x you #dean x reader #dean x y/n #sam x y/n #sam x reader

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ed-recovery-affirmations · 5 months

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Hello. So I'm having a battle inside of my brain. I've been following you for a while now, and I'm also in recovery for anorexia and bulimia. I'm also a newly graduated medical doctor. This means I know a lot about the human body. Which is exactly my point now. I try so, so hard to eat 'intuitively', listen to my body, and be okay with gaining weight, and I try to be in body positive and fat acceptance spaces (1/2, I will continue in next question)

(2/2), but I also know and I have seen with my two eyes, and treated with my own hands, the consequences of not eating healthy or being at an unhealthy body weight. I live in fear that If I eat and eat because I'm trying to recover, I'm gonna have the opposite health problems. I bring it up to my psychiatrist and psychologist, and they tell me there is no unhealthy food. But there is. And I just don't know how I should go with my recovery like this. Any advice for this? thank you for this blog

So I had to take a bit of time to think about the best way to articulate answers for you, because there are some complex and often competing needs addressed on my blog. I think it's important that you get an answer to your question, but I wanted to be careful to go about it in a way that wouldn't cause harm to anyone else. So I'm going to make my best effort, and putting it under a cut because it will be long and some who are triggered by medical views on fatness may prefer not to read on.

First of all, I'm so sorry to hear that you're struggling with this. Having a battle in your brain, as you say, sounds like an agonizing way to live. I hope that you are able to work through it.

Now, as you may know if you frequent this blog, eating disorders are complex and varied. Bodies and their workings are complex and varied. Some people do experience a variety of health conditions that are influenced by what they eat, so for these individuals, they may be best served by making choices accordingly. These choices can also be incredibly complex in this world - you may have seen a recent ask I recieved, for example, about somebody whose husband was just diagnosed with diabetes. The asker was stressed about learning to prepare foods for them both in accordance with his strict diabetes-friendly diet would trigger their restrictive tendencies from their eating disorder. So as you can see, the dietary choices that might be in his best interest might not be in the best interest of the asker. But them being married, I'm sure they would like to share meals together, so following a diet that suits them both is complicated. Difficult choices will have to be made at every juncture.

Gluten is not inherently bad or evil. Unless you have Celiac disease, in which case gluten is actually going to kill you slowly. You need to monitor your salt if you have high blood pressure, but if you've been diagnosed with POTS, you may actually need more salt, and lots of it. I myself will occasionally snack on chips, but never Funyuns. There's nothing inherently wrong with them, but they were invariably a trigger food for me to binge, so I stopped bringing them into my house. But this doesn't make them an unacceptable snack choice for everybody else.

Do you see where I'm going with this? Different people are experiencing different circumstances, and may need different things. Just because a food is particularly bad for one person doesn't make it a "bad food" unilaterally. Even the kinds of foods we consider "junk foods" can be tolerated by our bodies in moderation - well, most of our bodies, anyway. Now there are some people who have eating disorders like ARFID, where they literally cannot eat most foods and must veeery gradually expand their palate. For these individuals, we say "no food is bad food" because, while you might not like to see a person living on, say, saltine crackers or potato chips alone, they will literally starve without it, and so eating the food they can eat is preferable. For these individuals, that sleeve of saltine crackers can be a lifeline. Or take anyone who has a complex gastrointestinal disorder. Ask anyone with Chrohn's about their gut and its complicated relationship with fruits and veggies, a staple segment of the food pyramid touted by most doctors for its immense health benefits. Eating what you can will keep you alive and as healthy as possible in cases like these.

Now, there are people who are impacted in complex ways by the kinds of foods I'm guessing you're describing - things like chips, candy, fried food, processed/instant food. So in this case, do keep in mind that when an individual has a diet consisting largely of these types of foods, there are often complex genetic, epigenetic, and socioeconomic factors that are influencing the way their bodies naturally work and the way their dietary patterns have been established. I do understand how easy it is, at first glance, to just point at their diet and assume that it's easy and sustainable to change it, or that it would be a fix-all. But those same factors that contribute to the development of those complex health issues are often ongoing into the life of the affected individual, not to mention financial and social complications that may make it difficult to change things. But again, just because you've identified a certain food as detrimental to a patient's specific needs doesn't mean it's the same in regards to your own body's needs. Especially if these foods cause a trigger reaction for you to restrict or become obsessed with food "purity."

Now I know that in your work you say that you've treated with your own two hands the results of eating unhealthy foods. But I want you to get honest with yourself here, because you're not mentioning the experiences of the doctors who have treated and seen the damages of restrictive eating disorders. Both anorexia and bulimia, when sufficiently progressed, can cause lasting damage to the body even years into recovery. And they can also cause death. Surely a bag of chips or a cookie every now and again can't be more unhealthy than that? I'm hoping that you can take the time to periodically remind yourself of this, and to remind yourself that your own bodily needs are your own, and that paying attention to what YOUR body needs is self-care.

I know it's hard for an eating-disordered mind to listen to logic, but I'm truly hoping that you can overcome this for your own sake as well as for the sake of your patients. Anon, medical fatphobia has a long history of damaging patients. I know this because I myself have seen it happen. I've told the story before of my friend who was raised by hippies, fed all-organic snacks and kale chips, never allowed a hydrogenated oil, and was still fat growing up. I watched this person reduced to eating saltines and a few bites of apple per day when they were suffering with gallstones. It was all they could eat, but because they were fat, doctors assumed that their gastrointestinal distress must be caused by an excess of fatty foods in their diet. They lived on apple slices and saltines for months, still suffering pain all that time, before they were correctly diagnosed. Can you imagine what it did to their body, to live on such a restricted diet for such an extended period of time? This was not the only time a missed diagnosis threatened their health because all doctors saw was the fat. This person also starved themselves for a few years after being taught to do so at fat camp, and their anorexic behaviors were never called out because even though they did lose weight, they never ended up "skinny" at their lowest weight. But that starving certainly couldn't have been better for them than just living fat - their vision was blacking out every time they stood up! Anon, I hope you don't mind if I speak to you honestly about this. It's hard to gain a full honest medical history from every patient and patient family member you come across, because healthcare is a complicated field. But you cannot let your fear of fatness dictate the way you hear and see your patients. Yes, even if they're not following their prescribed diet. Yes, even if food is a contributing factor in their particular case. (And do keep in mind that a patient's refusal to change diet may come from a place of complicated factors, financial, social, emotional, you name it. Compassion will get you farther with them than judgment, and may even help you get a fuller story.) But do it for yourself, too. And listen to your body. If a food makes your body FEEL well and nourished, then it wasn't a bad food. And you deserve to be well fed and embark on your own healing journey. I hope you find the self-worth to believe that.

Because honestly, food deprivation affects your metabolism. You may experience the notorious anorexia recovery hunger as your appetite reemerges, and you will need to give your body what it needs in order to develop a pattern of being healed in both body and mind. You can keep nutritious options around for that, but I think you may need to keep working on your fear of "snack foods." Your metabolism may be changed as well, and so yes, you may gain back more weight than you had envisioned, or your body shape may be different than you had expected for a little while. Sometimes the weight distribution is a little weird during that regaining phase, and that's okay and does not determine your worth. You are going through a medical event and deserve to be compassionate with your body and soul as that happens. In fact, that is the only way you can heal your mind. Because, even before you look to your patients and the ideal steps for their specific health needs, you need to prioritize yourself and look to your own individual needs. So to recap, periodically use these reminders.

"Just because a food is bad for that other person doesn't make it a bad food. My dietary needs are my own."

"There's no food unhealthier than an eating disorder."

"I will look inward at what my own eating behaviors have done to my health, rather than ruminating on that patient's eating behaviors."

"I'd rather gain weight than hurt my body again."

"My thinness does not reflect my worth."

Feel free to add on as you progress in your recovery journey. Best of luck, in that and in your career. It's certainly not an easy one. Do your best, be open to learning, and remind your eating disorder that your therapists are right even if it doesn't want to listen to logic. I hope that when you are able to bring yourself to eat your next treat, you enjoy it thoroughly.

#intuitive eating #ed recovery #F/O/F #medical fatphobia #food purism #food purity #ana recovery #mia recovery #restriction recovery #orthorexia

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