#you are a MENACE | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

intotheelliwoods · 5 months

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You know what I'm going to haunt your ask box too EVIL LAUGH

RARAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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shoyoist · 1 year

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I'M CRYINGG SHUJI YOU'RE A MENACE 💀

#°.` ( ✿ ) — soliloquy .ᐟ‍#i want him so bad but #you only get him with a paid pass #and they dont accept money from overseas </3 #so even if i HAD the money to spare on a game 💔💔#hanma shuji #you are a MENACE

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shininglikeyoursmile · 2 years

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I have a gift for you...even though you love to complain and whine about factual things 🤣

You never thought you'd be in this position, but life has a way of doing that, throwing you curve balls. Which is how you found yourself in the dive at the highway rest stop, watching the big rigs come in.

You hadn't done it before and it terrified you.

You had seen him shuffle in the diner, grabbing a quick bite before heading out again. He was dirty, soot taunting his strong forearms as if he was elbow deep under the hood for hours. He barely spared a glance in your direction as he walked by, but it was enough to catch his attention.

You were nervous, that much he could tell. He was a week in on a long haul and hadn't had sex in months - work taking over his life. But Ari could feel his cock twitch in his pants.

Sighing deeply, he took a step over to you. He had never paid for sex before, but damn if he wasn't already hard at the thought of the seediness of it all.

"How much?"

It was so quiet you could barely hear him. But you responded with a number. Lower than what you needed to make your rent this month, but enough to put a dent in it.

Ari nodded, "Follow me."

His rig was huge and its colour a brilliant shade of deep sea blue - matching his eyes, you absently thought.

He helped you climb up, making sure you didn't fall back before he climbed in after you. You pulled yourself to the passenger side as he settled in. He wouldn't look over, both of you shy.

"What's your name?"

You smiled, and answered. He smiled back. "I'm Ari."

"Hi, Ari."

"Oh," he suddenly remembered and pulled out his wallet, handing you some bills.

You tucked the money in your bra and leaned over, eyes on his,, seductively, as you lowered his zipper. There was a hitch in his breath as you pulled his cock from his pants, fisting him.

He was huge in your hands and despite your nervousness, could feel yourself grow wet beneath your skirt.

Ari leaned in to you, capturing your lips with his, sliding his tongue easily in your mouth. You hummed appreciatively.

If this were anywhere else, your stomach would be fluttering at the soft sounds he was making. His scent was all grease and filth and 100% testosterone.

Ari tugged you over his lap, your skirt hiking up around your waist. You rubbed his fat head between your lips, soaking him in your juices as he made love to your mouth.

Ari couldn't take the teasing anymore, finally reaching around you and impaling you on his cock.

It was immediate - the overwhelming passion between you both. Your lips parted briefly to exclaim the sheer eroticism of the moment as your body got used to the size of him.

He gave you a moment - not a second longer.

Ari wrapped his arms tightly around your waist as he devoured your mouth and your cunt devoured him, slamming up into you in a frenzied pace.

Ari broke the kiss, burying his head in your neck as he succumbed to your body. You fingers dug into his Jean shirt, clawing at him - desperate for skin. With one arm still around your waist, he moved his other between your bodies, thumbing and rubbing against your clit.

You came fiercely, teeth claiming his naked and thick neck. You pierced his skin and Ari cried out - spilling his seed deep inside you, painting your walls a glorious shade of pearly white.

You relaxed in his arms, a shiver running up your back and through the sweat that pooled there. As you both came to, you pulled away, remembering your place, but Ari kept you close, mumbling into your lips which he swept his tongue over.

"Do you need to go? Meet someone?"

"No," you breathed. "This was the first time I've done this."

Ari pulled back, searching your eyes for the truth. Finding it there, he smiled, brushing his fingers through your hair. "I wouldn't mind company on the road if you have no place to be."

"I think I'd like that," you said, smiling.

😊

I-

HOW THE FUCK I AM SUPPOSED TO RESPOND????!?!?!? 🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🥵🥵🥵🥵🥴🥴🥴😵😵😵😵😵😵😵😵

I WANT THIS MAN TO FUCKING OWN ME . FUCK ME DUMB UNTIL ALL MY HOLES ARE LEAKING WITH HIS CUM . JUST UUUGGGHHHHHHHHH😣😣😣😣😣😣😣😣😣😣😣😣

THIS IS FUCKING EROTIC!! AND NOW I NEED TO GET OFFF AND YHE DAY HAD JUST STARTED AND I AM WHINING LIKE A BITCH IN HEAT 💦💦💦💦💦💦💦💦💦💦💦💦💦💦

Why would you do that to me 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺😣😣😣😣🤤🤤🤤😵😵😵🥴🤯🥴🤯🤯🥴🥴😵🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵

AAAAAGGGHHHH THIS IS JUST SO FUCKING SEXYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵💦💦💦💦💦💦

I am staring at the wall . Dumb. No thoughts. Head empty .

#YOU ARE A MENACE #etyjsgtsrtsrgjsfg #ari levinson x female reader #ari levinson fanfiction #ari levinson x reader #ari levinson x f!reader #ari Levinson smut #chris evans imagine

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banannabethchase · 10 months

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So put your hands down my pants and I'll bet you'll feel nuts (Billy Gunn and I WANT to say the absurd crack ship but instead I will say either Buck.)

Bet You'll Feel Nuts

~

"Oh, don't you fuckin' dare."

Matt has nowhere to go as he flies through the air, and Billy catches him, a hand between his thighs. He feels himself blush and prays his stupid dick doesn't betray him.

Billy slams him into the ground. Matt doesn't look up and gaze into Billy's eyes on purpose, but what else can he do?

"Next time you reach between my legs, make sure I'm not wearing pants," Matt laughs. He's not nervous. But he's desperate to know Billy's response.

"Oh, I will," Billy says with a wink. "I'd take care of you real good."

He pushes himself up, and Matt knows the way he brushes his dick against Matt's is on purpose.

When he finally climbs up to the ring, Nick's glaring at him.

"Where the heck were you?!"

"Under Billy," Matt says, brushing his gear off.

Nick snorts. "I meant just now."

Matt shoves him off the ring apron.

#BillyMatt #wtf i like wrestling now???#in which sara writes #sarahcakes613 #You are a MENACE #Matt Attrackson

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rotisseries · 8 months

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hey you know the hand symbolism in totk. hey you know the kings quote "your hand was beyond saving". hey you know how that was the hand link reached for zelda. zelda was beyond saving do you hear me

gloomy GET AWAY FROM ME

#you are a MENACE #ask #gloomybirdie #hi gloomy!

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lovelaceisntdead · 8 months

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Hey are you single

Did you mean to send this anon too or just the other one. And why yes Lígia I am single, what possible reason could you have for asking?

#you are a menace #but i love you.

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kyeomyun · 10 months

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EVIL LAUGHTER

I HATE YOU SM SKYE OMG 😭 (ilysm thank you)

HE SECURED IT. THERE. HE SECURED THE ULT SPOT NEXT TO DK.

#{💌} — besties ><#{🐯} — skye ^^#YOU ARE A MENACE #YOU DID ME DIRTY SKYE OH MY-

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theredrogue · 1 year

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Faith may be in your walls but I'm standing on your table informing you doctors used to treat "hysteria" by a "pelvic finger massage"

Stop speaking.

In general.

Please.

#I shall never know peace again.#Go live in the walls with Atlas damn it.#I can’t live laugh love in these conditions #Get Outtttt #You are a menace #Cursed whyyyyy

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rczc · 1 year

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im crying your tags hahaha im sorry i broke u!!! i luv u

this was me after reading the title THE FUCKING TITLE JEN I AM NOTNOKAYYYYY

#you are a menace #but I love you

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guccicologne · 2 years

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Do it clap?

#you are a menace #and a gay boy #but I love you for it bae

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averaillisa · 2 months

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#love how these two are menaces in different ways #you step into the funeral parlor and immediately take like -1000 psychic damage #genshin impact #zhongli #hu tao #wangsheng funeral parlor #my art #chibi #wangsheng duo

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moron-rights · 7 months

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daily-dragon-drawing · 1 month

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Mr J dragon!! (With an annoying lil brother kofu dragon) 🤭

#74 & #75 - 流浪貓 (liúlàng māo / stray cat) & 威脅者 (wēixié zhě / menace) - My two favorite internet cats!!! A master and his apprentice 💖🐈💕🐈‍⬛💞

@straycatj I turned you into a dragon…I hope it’s ok……

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ayo-edebiri · 4 months

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They are my icons

#walker scobell #Percy Jackson #leah sava jeffries #i love them omg #if you watch the interview they stole everything from this set... they are MENACES

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catpriciousmarjara · 7 months

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Getting a PHD literally anywhere else: Wow! Congratulations! What a great achievement! Amazing!

Getting a PHD in Gotham: Wow! Amazing! You're now on several Government, Civilian, and Bat watchlists.

So if any of the Wayne kids get a PHD, then the entirety of Gotham would be squinting at them suspiciously. They're rich, so resources, and most likely already insane with all the shit they pull.

What I'm saying is if Jason went and got himself a Doctorate in Literature, the whole city would anticipate the appearance of his villainsona called the Dead Poet(emphasis on the dead) or Bookkeeper or something else similarly nerdy and themed like that for sure.

I just know that it would turn into some Gotham inside joke with memes abound, and everytime Jason would, I don't know, give more funding to the neglected Arts Departments in Gotham University, or go to a school for read alongs to encourage kids to read, Gotham social media would go crazy and be like:

"The Dreaded Villain Dead Poet Reads Alice in Wonderland to Children! How Despicable!"

"Villain Dead Poet Lambasts Government on Banning Books! Leads Librarians to Riot!"

"Dead Poet Ramps up his Villainy by Establishing Educational Programmes in Crime Alley! Uplifting the Poor! What a Dastardly Villain!"

"Dead Poet Goes on Live Ranting About his Favourite Books! Favourite Author is Jane Austen! Is this the Feminist Agenda?"

And so on! It's a meme that refuses to go away. His siblings actively participate, and make the situation worse.

Dick held an online Gotham Villains and Anti-Heroes Poll and Dead Poet came out on top, over Red Hood. Jason is an actual Gotham crime boss, but his crowdfunded villainsona is more popular. No he's not salty about it at all.

Duke would create a montage of Dead Poet sightings.

Stephanie would make a Dead Poet meme compilation.

Tim would arrange Wayne Enterprises to donate to local libraries after allegedly being threatened by the heinous villain Dead Poet. (Jason did ask Tim to do that but not like that)

Barbara created an extremely popular Villain Watch account for Dead Poet.

Cass tweeted out Jason's favourite books as the villain Dead Poets reading list telling people to avoid them 'wink wonk', causing a massive uptick in the sale of those books ala Bigolas Dickolas.

Damian of all people tweeted out a pic of Jason playing with Alfred the cat accusing the evil villain Dead Poet of attempting to kidnap his cat.

And thats not to mention all the shenanigans they pull in their batsonas.

God bless Gotham and it's home grown, organic, not even remotely ethically sourced, free range chaos.

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excalisi · 17 days

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it's a fun hc of mine that during dick's robin days, he went through the "omg i wish i had a cool secret language so i can have secret conversations with my friends" phase all kids go through. but one of his closest friends at the time also happened to be the batman, a guy with possibly the most bizarrely diverse arsenal of skills in the world. bruce sees the merit in the entire idea of a coded language to communicate rudimentary information when they can hear but not see each other. so why not make a code built on bird vocalizations? it's pretty much incomprehensible to anyone without a trained ear or comprehensive knowledge of birding and impossible to even passably mimic without proper training, so while the chances of interception are high, the chances of someone understanding it enough to interrupt during the middle of a bird-convo and feed false information are not.

it also, batman and robin come to realize, feed into the "holy fuck our vigilantes are cryptids" idea. bird sounds that come from seemingly no determinable location (ventriloquism) come to mean batman and robin are nearby. to the goons of gotham, bird song becomes inextricably connected to getting your ass kicked by the dynamic duo. the real reason why criminals don't operate during the day is because they get skittish and jumpy about if the sounds of birds chirping are real birds or some masked vigilantes lying in wait to rock your shit, and it's just easier to commit crimes during the night when all the birds are asleep so you know for sure.

ornithologists have boards on their bedrooms dedicated to the bird-bats of gotham. they've written dissertations.

the bird language becomes a bit of a batfamily bonding connection. teaching each other how to do different clicks and whistles, making up slang so bruce and barbara can't complain of clogging up comms with non-mission relevant talk, searching up birds to associate them with different people, psychologically terrorizing the criminal populace of gotham by chirping at them...

how the bird code works is that there's a bird assigned to each one of gotham's major heavy hitter criminals and vigilantes, and a few assigned to heroes out of the city (by which i mean the ones the bats associate with often enough to have a sign to address by). the only birds i've got so far are the robin (for robin. self-explanatory) and the glistening-green tanager (for the joker). i only have one for the joker bc i wanted to reference this hc in one of my fics and so searched up green birds to find the most eye-searingly annoying-to-look-at green bird i could find, and the glistening-green tanager was the closest one to fit the bill.

#dc #dc comics #batman #bruce wayne #dick grayson #dc robin #robin #batfam #batfamily #you're a goon in gotham wondering in terror where the hell those menaces are so that their chirping echoes from everywhere at once #and red robin is just snidely insulting your haircut while red hood laughs at you

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