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user21340 · 3 years

Text

the world in her arms

(i don’t own this gif or characters used in this fic)

pairing: natasha romanoff x fem!reader

summary: you and natasha have always had quite a flirty and sarcastic relationship. both of you develop feelings for one another but you both are clueless to what the other feels until nat gets jealous and says something hurtful to you. will you make up (or out)?

warnings: minor angst, fluff, swearing, and a mention of death.

word count: 2.1k

a/n: omg thank you so much for 57 followers love you all 💕. sorry for the lack of content i didn’t know what to write and had almost no new ideas. also i’m a youngin and worked my first 8 hr day yesterday so your girl was exhausted and i have finals coming up soon. k thank you for coming to my ted talk, enjoy!

also this song doesn’t relate to the story at all but it’s underrated imo and also sorry for the weird pov changes throughout the story.

“Hey y/l/n! Where are you headed?” Natasha yells from the kitchen while I’m standing in the living room on our shared floor.

“Wouldn’t you like to know Nat.” I say with a smirk.

“Yeah matter of fact I would.” she retorts.

“Chill, I’m just headed to train some recruits with Clint. But don’t miss me too much, I'll be back in a few hours, Natty.” You blow a kiss her way, and she just rolls her eyes partially from the kiss and the use of her nickname but you see a faint pink tint sitting atop of her cheeks before she turns away.

I’ve been training these recruits with Clint for a couple hours and my session is nearing an end. Something I’ve picked up on today is how touchy and how dumb these recruits are acting just for me to correct their form. I don’t have time for this shit I think as this girl has me correct her jab form for what has to be the fifth time this hour.

Non readers pov

Natasha actually does start to miss you because of how bored she is due to the larger training room being occupied for these recruits. She heads down to see if you are wrapping up yet and see if you’d like to grab dinner with her somewhere. She arrives at the training room and heads to the back room where there is a large one way mirror. Natasha, having nothing better to do, watches Clint and yourself interact with these seemingly clueless recruits.

Minutes pass and Natasha honestly likes seeing your frustration every time a recruit asks you a stupid question or something you’d already answered for the hundredth time this session. That is until she sees this handsy recruit keep asking you to correct your form which she sees you fake a smile at and happily correct it. As if Natasha isn’t jealous already she sees you release a genuine large laugh at something a recruit says. Not being able to withstand witnessing anymore of this behavior from you directed towards anyone else except her. Natasha then storms off into the living room.

Readers pov

I was nearing the end of this session when a recruit comes up behind me and asks, “Soooo, is it true that you and Clint are like a thing?” he asks with no trace of humor or sarcasm on his face. I just bust out laughing because one, everyone or at least almost everyone who knows about The Avengers knows that I’m 100% only interested in women and two, CLINT? I mean he is a great guy and all but I’ll never forget the time I went into a diner to have breakfast with him and the waitress assumed he was my grandfather.

twenty long minutes later...

The living room is lively and everyone seems to strike up a conversation with one another. I decide to strike up a conversation with Natasha who is weirdly acting cold all of a sudden.

“Oh my god! You know what I just remembered the other day? My mom used to-“

“Shut up, y/n/n. I don’t care and I don’t think anyone does at the moment.” she exclaims with a small smirk thinking you’ll detect her harsh-morbid sarcasm.

“Oh.” you choke out, “It’s getting pretty late I-I better head to bed” my voice cracks as I mutter a small, ‘asshole’ agony laced in my voice blinking the hot tears away. I start walking towards my room but it slowly turns into a jog, then sprint. Anything to get to my room and release my sadness.

Non readers pov

The room is frozen. Everyone is staring at Natasha.

“I care.” Wanda states heading to your room because she knows you shouldn’t be alone right now.

“Jesus Nat, that was awful. You know you’ve fucked you when even I say it’s bad. Poor girl’s mom passed when she was around 10.” Tony deadpans.

“Oh my god, what have I done?” Nat says burying her head into her hands.

“I’m not too sure how you’re gonna get out of this one Nat, but you’ve gotta fix this.” Sam says.

Wanda reaches your room and hears loud yet muffled sobs while standing in the hallway. She can feel your grief rippling through her body. The only heartache she can relate to is the moment she lost Pietro which is more than an average person should feel. She knocks on the door softly yet hard enough to alert you of her presence.

Readers pov

I hear three soft knocks on the door. I quickly silence my cries and assume it is Nat. I then clear my throat as the knocking continues and muster up enough energy to speak,

“Go away” into my pillow loudly. The knocking stops but I don’t hear anyone walk away just yet.

“Y/n/n, it’s Wanda. Can you let me in please, so we can talk?” she asks, I stand up while groaning and walk towards the door. I unlock it and open it just a crack to make sure she is alone and not with a certain someone. It is pretty short-lived as Wanda pushes the door open the rest of the way.

“Oh hon, I’m sorry.” She says as she wraps me into a tight hug after closing the door behind her. I crumble into her embrace as she rubs small circles on my back. Wanda has always been such a calming figure in my life since I met her, a major part being that she can feel almost all of my anxieties that try to drown me throughout a day. She also knows how it feels to be alone which allows her to relate to my feelings, so she knows just how much missing someone who is gone for eternity hurts.

We hug for what feels like minutes but when I take a quick glance outside my window it is dark out.

“Is it true?” I rasp.

“What?” she counters.

“Y’know that no one cares. All I wanted to do was share a memory that I remembered of myself with my mom and as you know it isn’t too often that I remember these types of things and when I do I love sharing them, so she won’t ever be forgotten. It just hurts so much to be shut down talking about something you truly care about by someone you care about.” I explain while Wanda looks at me with the softest eyes I’ve ever seen while nodding her head slightly.

“Now that is the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard. I care and everyone in this compound cares about what you have to say as well as what you are feeling. You know how Natasha can be sometimes with the insensitive comments she makes before realizing what she’s doing.”

“I know but that doesn’t give her the right to j-just say stuff like that. I get how full our relationship is with banter and sarcastic comments but I really thought she was starting to like me.” I frown as Wanda just nods. That’s when exhaustion hits me like a truck.

“Wands, before I ask you this just know you can decline.” I give her a minute to protest, but she says nothing. ” Can you sleep with me?” Wanda’s eyes widen,

”Y/n/n I don’t think that is a good id-“ I realize what I just said and cut her off before things get even more uncomfortable. “Nonono, Wanda, like lay down with me not any of that gross stuff. Ew.” Wanda’s features fill with relief, and she chuckles at my childish comment about sex.

“Of course I will! You just may want to word it a little different next time.” she chuckles as you hide your face with embarrassment. We both get settled on the bed and I feel her two arms pull me towards her and I snuggle closer.

Non readers pov

Wanda slowly gets out of bed after she is sure you are fast asleep and sets off to find Nat. When she does she sees that Nat had barely moved from where she last saw her still with her face in her hands.

“Nat. I know you think you really screwed up, which you did, but it’s y/n/n. You can’t go on without telling her how you feel about her.”

“Wanda, you can’t just look in my mind! We’ve talked about this!”

“Romanoff you know I’m one to keep my promises, so I’d never look without your permission. Maybe if you turned down the volume of your thoughts a few decibels I wouldn’t have heard anything. Also, are you ready that oblivious to the fact the whole team knows you two are like little lovesick puppies for one another when you two aren’t attached by the hip.” she explains, “Now, stop moping around and apologize at least.”

“You’re right, Wands, wish me luck. I hope she can forgive me.”

Natasha gets up and races towards your room. She didn’t want to wait so long to talk to you and apologize, but she thought you wouldn’t want to speak to her after what she’d said.

Similarly, to Wanda’s entrance, Natasha softly knocks on your door enough to wake you even out of your semi-deep sleep.

Readers pov

I jump at the knocks on the door and am confused to see Wanda is no longer beside me.

“Wanda you don’t have to knock, you know that.” I sigh out.

“It isn’t Wanda.” a voice you are able to recognize as Nat sheepishly speaks.

“Oh, what do you need?” I ask, all the heartbreak and ache coming back when I hear the voice I’m usually excited to listen to, as if her speech is my favorite song.

“Can we talk? I need to apologize.”

“Sure,” I softly reply.

Non readers pov

Nat opens the door once she has your permission and sees your usual strong, confident frame look small and fragile. Her heart breaks at the sight of you so broken and in pain because of her own actions. Not to mention your tear stained cheeks when you look towards her. It is silent for a minute or so before you throw your head back onto your pillow staring at the ceiling. This awakens something in Natasha for an unknown reason.

Readers pov

“Y/n, I am so sorry. I know that sorry doesn’t cut it for the amount of hurt I’ve caused you all because I was jealous but I hope we can rebuild what we had but it totally is okay if you don’t want to even though I would love another chance with yo-“

“Nat, calm down. I’m not going to sit here and say I’m fine with what you said because truth be told I love sharing memories of my family when I remember them with you. Not only because I trust you but because I think I care for you and love you more than friends should. I just hope what you said is meaningless or else that is when we can’t rebuild what we had.”

“No y/n/n, I didn’t mean any of it. It was just in the heat of the moment because I saw you laughing at something a recruit said when I was going to ask you if you wanted to go get dinner with me. So, I stormed off like a child and said hurtful things to mask my selfishness because I want you to be mine and mine only.”

“Oh my god Nat. You can’t be serious, I was laughing at something a recruit said because he assumed Clint and I were going out.” Nat bursts out laughing.

“See? Anyone who was told that who knew me would just die of laughter on the spot.” I say as I glance her way while patting the place beside me on my bed. She accepts.

“So you actually like me?” you hopefully ask.

“Possibly depending on if those feelings are reciprocated.”

“They are.” I say.

“Good. Can I also say how sorry I am for saying that to-“ I cut her off but placing a quick peck to her soft lips.

“Uh, uh, uh” I tut, “I don’t want to hear any more apologies come out of that mouth. Could you just hold me?” Natasha is still dumbfounded by the little kiss.

“Of course.” Nat complies pressing your back to her front as she wraps her long toned arms around your frame. I hum at the contact.

At this moment Nat realizes there is no place she’d rather be as she feels like she has the world in her arms.

#natasha romanoff x y/n #natasha romanov x reader #natasha romanoff imagine #natasha romanoff x fem!reader #natasha romanoff x you #natasha romanoff x reader #black widow x reader #Spotify

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jaggedlittleteacup · 3 years

Text

I’m Right Here

Sharon wouldn’t stop talking.

Honestly, John was getting a bit sick of this. It was supposed to be a date- mutual conversation and all- but the woman wouldn’t quit chattering about her job as some sort of important romance novelist. Great and all, but this had been going on for at least forty-five minutes, and Sharon hadn’t even ordered her food yet. John was seriously considering asking Sherlock to ‘urgently’ call him to a case just to let him escape from this droll and unimaginative dinner.

Now, this didn’t mean he was some sort of insensitive arsehole who only cared about getting in Sharon’s expensive and well-hemmed skirt. If you asked him, John would say that he was a pretty considerate bloke. He always listened closely, reciprocated, paid the check, and waited for the woman to make the first move.

But by God, Sharon had been speaking for a very long time and did not seem to be slowing down. In fact, she hardly seemed to notice John’s unassuming presence, save for his occasional nod and curt “oh, really?” He was also hungry. It was not a good mix.

Sharon’s shrill, snappish voice exclaimed, “John!” in an attempt to grab his fast-fading attention. Her hand, which had been previously twirled in her long, curly, raven-black hair, flew down and waved in his face. “Did you hear a word I just said?” she demanded indignantly.

Turned out he wasn’t as good a listener as he thought.

“Er- sorry, what? I must have gotten distracted,” John mumbled in a vague attempt to cover up his distinct lack of attention. He couldn’t help it- Sharon wasn’t making a whole lot of sense.

She huffed and rubbed one pale cheek with her finger. “I was saying that I think that Mark should be the killer. He seems to be the sketchiest character out of all the ones I’ve drawn up. Or do you think that Taylor would kill Liana? Honestly, Taylor and Andrew have better chemistry, but Liana seems like she would be the first one to die in that sort of situation. Andrew would be better at hiding the knife, though…” Sharon trailed off, lost in thought. She seemed to be in her own little world, so why the hell did she need John, again?

John stared at her blankly. “Didn’t you say you wrote romance novels?” he asked, desperately hating how stupid and oblivious he sounded. “I’m a bit lost, to be honest.”

“Oh, keep up!” she snapped, tapping her fingers onto a white ceramic plate that still stayed frightfully empty and completely devoid of any food. “I told you when we met, I’m taking the dive into crime! What do you think of me making the main killer in love with the hero?” Sharon’s mood switched from angry to curious faster than John had ever previously witnessed.

He swallowed and glanced at his half-empty glass of water. “I think that maybe you should stick with romance? Mixing genres doesn’t always turn out well, y’know? You ought to write what you’re comfortable with, and I don’t think you’re all that comfortable with thrillers,” John said carefully, thinking through each word as though it might be his last.

Her mouth hung open in disbelief. “You know what?” she snarled, abruptly standing up and angrily stuffing a few of her things into her purse. “I didn’t come here for a date with some all-knowing arsehole who thinks he knows everything about writing!”

“Cheryl, wait-“

“MY NAME IS SHARON!” Sharon yelled, pulling on her coat, and only then did John realise how much taller she was than him. Seriously, the woman had to be at least six feet. The heels certainly did not help, either.

John looked up helplessly. “Look, I’ll get the check. I- Should I call you?”

She paused her little tantrum to glare at him with the fervour of a thousand suns. “ABSOLUTELY NOT!”

“Right, yeah, got it. Sorry the date was crap, Sharon. But maybe next time, you should avoid talking about work?” he offered, only half-joking. She’d never get another date if she continued to be so…high-strung.

She shook her head, face twisted in disgust, and left the restaurant without another word.

John was left alone.

And Sherlock hadn’t even been the one to cockblock him this time.

༺═──────────────═༻

“How was your incredibly tedious date?” Sherlock inquired, his hands gently placed in front of him in his classic thinking position. A few nicotine patches were plastered on his arms. It was unusual, to say the least, that Sherlock was even curious about the date, but John wasn’t about to argue. His date had been crap enough, thank-you-very-much.

He sighed. “Awful. Bloody…awful. Just the absolute worst. Sharon was boring, self-absorbed, and had the temper of- well, it was worse than yours.”

“Oh, boring? I deduced as much,” Sherlock yawned. “You should give up the dating scene altogether, John. I do believe celibacy suits you.” Now he was teasing, and something was definitely off.

“Yeah, well, maybe I wouldn’t be ‘celibate’ if you’d stop hijacking all of my mildly successful dates,” John retorted, hanging his jacket up and walking towards the kitchen. “Anything in?”

Sherlock ignored his inquiry. “I didn’t hijack this one,” he noted, exhaling slightly and sounding just the least bit smug. “You can’t blame your failures on me, John. Perhaps your charms would be better suited elsewhere.”

“Yeah, on who? On you?” John snorted and slammed the refrigerator shut after realising it was completely full of dismembered body parts. “I’d have more luck flirting with a bloody brick wall. And, you know- not gay,” he added, almost like an afterthought.

“As you never cease to insist,” Sherlock muttered, turning to his side and continuing to think.

For the rest of the night, Sherlock was in a right mood, although John, for the life of him, could not figure out why.

༺═──────────────═༻

The next date went a bit smoother, at first.

Samantha was smart, charming, and a bit daring- certainly an interesting woman, one whom John would not mind going home with, if he got the chance. She was, of course, beautiful as well. Tall and thin, perfect lips, and a dark, wavy pixie cut. A dream date, one John was damn lucky to have.

“So, what do you do, John?” she asked, taking a sip of wine.

He chuckled and thought about an answer that wouldn’t have her desperate to leave. “Er- I work at a surgery and work as a…consultant’s assistant in my spare time.”

“Oh, that sounds lovely! I do more freelance stuff, myself, actually. I’m a defense attorney.”

John winced. Why, why did she have to be a lawyer, of all things? “Uh…What sort of people do you defend?”

She shrugged. “Anyone willing to pay. Did you know…” Samantha lowered her voice conspiratorially, “…I once got a murderer off his charge?”

“Ah.” John had dealt with his fair share of murderers in his life. He did not appreciate it when one was released when they were so obviously guilty.

“What? Something wrong?” she wondered aloud, briefly glancing over the menu.

“You know what?” John smiled cheerfully and placed down his glass. “I’m not very hungry.”

Needless to say, the date did not work out.

༺═──────────────═༻

“Back already?” Sherlock asked, examining a slightly burnt tie in his hands. “I think you’ve set a new record, John. Was it a full half-hour?”

John groaned and slammed the door shut. “No. She freed criminals for a living! How the hell was I supposed to continue to date- keeping bad people off the street is our literal job!” He stormed over to the living room and moodily sat down in his chair.

Sherlock glanced up in faint amusement. “Was she an attractive woman?”

“Yeah, I’ll say. And she was damn interesting, too,” John muttered, finally looking at Sherlock. “Is that my tie-?”

“Er- It’s being used for a noble cause, John,” Sherlock quickly defended, already reaching for a pair of scissors. “Thanks to this tie, a domestic abuser will be behind bars.” He paused. “That is, if he doesn’t hire Miss Samantha to get him free.”

“How did you k- You know what, nevermind.” John rubbed his face in his hands. “I’d ask if there was anything in, but…”

Sherlock sat bolt upright, as though he had been waiting for this moment all day. “You’ve been quite incorrect in your analysis! I thought that the date might go sour, so I took the liberty of procuring sustenance.” He threw the tie across the room, leapt up, and went to the kitchen to grab a takeaway bag.

John simply watched on in amusement. Sherlock looked so proud of himself, it was almost adorable. “Thanks, mate,” he said, because he wasn’t sure how else to express what he was feeling.

The next thing was the most curious. Upon hearing John’s comment, Sherlock seemed to visibly deflate a bit, although he was almost instantly back to being chipper. “I wasn’t sure if you would want Chinese or Italian, so I just got both,” he murmured, before pulling down his sleeve to conceal the several nicotine patches pressed to his skin.

“I- Jesus, Sherlock, you didn’t have to,” John stuttered out, flustered and confused by Sherlock’s sudden warmth.

“I’m well aware of that fact, John. I figured it might help your mood, considering your date was rubbish and I’ve destroyed three of your ties.”

“THREE-“

Sherlock grinned. “Noble cause, remember? Chinese or Italian?”

John sighed and shrugged. “Both, I guess. Why not both?” he asked at Sherlock’s sudden disapproving look.

“You can’t have your cake and eat it, too,” Sherlock remarked whimsically, before setting down a few plates in front of himself and his flatmate. He moodily picked up his fork and took a bite.

“O-kay then,” John muttered. “Glad to know you’ve learned your fair share of proverbs.”

“Want to watch one of those atrocious Bond films?” Sherlock swiftly inquired, not missing a beat. His mood seemed to have picked up considerably as he stood up to retrieve the film.

Hell, why not? If Sherlock was amenable, then so was John. “Sure, Sherlock,” he said, settling down and preparing for a lot of complaining.

If he wasn’t mistaken, Sherlock seemed to slide a bit closer to him than usual.

The strangest thing was that John didn’t mind in the least.

༺═──────────────═༻

Three was supposed to be the lucky one. Third time’s the charm, and all.

And…surprisingly enough, she was!

Her name was Sheliana, but she went by Shelly, and she was drop-dead gorgeous. Dark, cropped curls framed an ivory face, slender fingers tapped teasingly against perfectly angled cheekbones, and her eyes were an almost iridescent colour that John couldn’t quite place.

She was perfect.

“John,” she said sweetly. “We’ve talked so much about me, I want to know a bit about you! What are your interests, likes- You seem like an interesting bloke, to be honest!”

John chuckled and shrugged. “I work at a surgery part-time, and work with my flatmate, Sherlock, a lot as well. He’s…great, to be honest. He’s very intelligent, charming when he likes to be, and just all around a nutter. It’s refreshing to be around him. I never really get tired of it.”

“Oh, the famous detective? That’s so odd!” Shelly smiled. “And, well, you seem to like him rather a lot, don’t you? Have a bit of a man-crush?” she teased.

“Right, yea- No! No, I don’t. He’s just my best friend, that’s all,” John quickly saved, his cheeks flushed pink in embarrassment as he picked up his glass. “You didn’t tell me what you did for a living.” He prayed it wouldn’t be practicing law.

“Forensic analyst. I work with the nitty-gritty of detecting that most don’t like very much- I won’t bore you on the details,” she said, straightening her navy blue blouse.

“Oh, no, that’s fine,” John said swiftly, taking a sip of water. “Sherlock and I work a lot with that sort of thing. He’s scarily good, to be honest. I bet he could have been anything he wanted, if he didn’t choose to be a consulting detective.”

“Hm,” Shelly mumbled thoughtfully. “Well, he sounds positively lovely!”

John shrugged and chuckled. “Eh, you know. He’s not the world’s best flatmate by any chance, but I love spending time with him. Even when he’s being an arse,” he tacked on at the end. “I mean, he’s getting better, I suppose. Yesterday he got takeaway unprompted and watched Spectre with me.”

Isn’t that what girlfriends are supposed to do? Feed you up?

John shook away the thought and drank some more water. He didn’t know why that particular phrase popped into his head.

Shelly smiled fondly. “He sounds like he’d be a great boyfriend,” she remarked, her eyes twinkling.

“Oh, him?” John said, almost defensively. “No, no, he’s- er…he doesn’t date women. Says they’re ‘not his area’, something or other.” He couldn’t help but feel a bit uncomfortable. Wasn’t Shelly supposed to be on a date with him?

Shelly laughed, caught John’s confused gaze, and laughed some more. Her glass almost slipped from her hands as she had a riot, hooting and coughing until she wiped tears from her eyes. “Oh, John,” she said simply, stifling another chuckle. “John, you are so adorable, you know that? Really, I mean that in the nicest way possible.”

“What?” John said, wishing he didn’t sound like such an idiot.

Shelly looked at him, dumbfounded. “You really don’t know? Two, what, consulting detectives, and you can’t figure it out?”

John blanked.

“Oh, wow,” she said softly. “You really don’t get it. Well, let’s put all the clues together, hm? You’ve got a lovely flatmate who has told you that women ‘aren’t his area’.”

“Now, wait just a-“

“-Second, he’s apparently been trying to get closer to you. Indulging your interests, one might say,” Shelly said, a bit more mischievously than John would have liked.

“One might not say,” John retorted half-heartedly.

“And third, well, the third was easy,” she said rather sadly. “I like you, John, I really do. You seem funny, sweet, and bloody hell, you’re so, so handsome! But given the fact that you’ve spent the entire date talking about your flatmate, I’d say it’s clear where your priorities lay.” Shelly patted John’s hand and leaned back a bit. “Look at me, John. Really look.”

John looked. All he could see was that yet another gorgeous woman was about to reject him because she thought he was…

“I’m not gay,” John said finally.

“No, you aren’t,” Shelly noted with a half-smirk. “I could tell that from the beginning. I know what Sherlock looks like. I’ve seen the photographs. And…” She traced her cheekbones and brushed a finger lightly against her dark, curly hair. “…I can see the resemblance.”

For a moment, John couldn’t say anything. He blinked a few times, still silent.

Sharon.

Curly black hair, pale skin, slender fingers.

Samantha.

Short hair, tall and thin, perfect lips.

Shelly.

Intelligent, cheekbones, eyes, black jacket and blue accent…

“Oh,” John said quietly.

“Oh,” Shelly whispered. “Do you want me to get the check?”

“But-“ He was seconds away from protesting when she gave him a knowing look.

“Go,” she goaded. “It’s not every day you have a realisation like this. Go get him.”

John stammered out apologies and thank yous and a million other unnecessary words as he grabbed his things and raced out the restaurant.

As he glanced back, he caught sight of her melancholy expression and felt guilty, but the thought of telling Sherlock, well…

He was terrified.

He was terrified all the way up until he opened the door to his flat and stomped upstairs to discover his lonely flatmate sitting on the sofa and watching telly.

“You’re back earlier than I suspected,” Sherlock said a bit dejectedly. His disappointment was clear to John, now- he’d no idea how he’d managed to miss it before.

“I had to come back,” John panted, tired from the running he’d done. (His leg hadn’t hurt since he’d met Sherlock.)

Sherlock glanced up in alarm. “Did you forget your keys?”

“No. I forgot about you,” John said breathlessly, his cheeks a bit pink. “I think I might be in love with you. You know…”

“As a friend?” Sherlock asked.

John stared at him.

The room was silent.

Nobody moved.

Slowly, Sherlock’s eyes crinkled at the corners the way they did when he was especially pleased with himself. “I was having a bit of fun,” he admitted. “In truth, the moment you said that, it was as though my mind short-circuited.”

“Had to reboot, did you?” John mumbled, still recovering from the miniature heart attack Sherlock had given him.

Sherlock snorted. “Are people in the habit of giving hard drives a kiss when they want them to work?”

“No,” John said with a shrug. “They usually punch them.”

“Hm,” Sherlock mused. “I’ll pass. Although it wouldn’t be the first time…”

“Mention Irene and I swear, Sherlock, Captain Watson will be making an appearance,” John said in warning, only half-joking. It was the only way he knew how to get some sense into Sherlock’s head.

He willed himself to ignore the blush he spotted.

“What now?” Sherlock wondered aloud after a moment of quiet contemplation.

“What do you mean?” John replied, tentatively inching closer to the sofa.

Sherlock unfolded his hands and turned to completely face John. “What does this mean?”

“We could go in circles all night, you know.”

“No. I’d much rather you sit with me, John,” Sherlock said in return. “We could order takeaway. Watch a film.”

“Could I sit closer to you?” John asked.

Sherlock didn’t say anything, but merely smiled and slid over, patting the space next to him. “Come. Sit. Close as you’d like. We can rot our brains watching mindless action films. Hydrogen Bond, or whatever.”

“James Bond.”

“Chemical Bond,” Sherlock muttered.

“James Bond.”

“Jim Blond.”

“I’m going to hit you with a pillow.”

“Jackson Bronze.”

“It’s James bloody Bond, Sherlock!”

“Gavin.”

“Okay, that’s not even funny.”

“It made you laugh.”

“It did, didn’t it?”

“Yes. It did.”

( @call-me-moo I literally love you [platonic] because you made me actually get work done! Ah! Yay!)

#sherlock #bbc #sherlock holmes #john watson #jim moriarty #johnlock #post reichenbach #benedict cumberbatch #jalexandria #writing #fics #writing fluff to make people happy

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fiddleabout · 5 years

Note

have you listened to lover yet? thoughts??

HAVE I LISTENED TO IT, YOU ASK

the real question is if i listened to anything else on the 24 hours straight of travel home from south africa last weekend

(i did but. like. barely.)

THOUGHTS:

it’s no 1989 but like

shit

it’s still really fucking good

like there are obviously some duds on there

the spelling thing

the gay one is like...idk fine but it’s just not As Good

the london boy one is just like

c r i n g e

but the rest

the rest

hnnag;lkjflk;jasag

cruel summer!

paper rings!

the man!

sleeper hit i think he knows is such a fucking jam that i was like ehhh about initially but now i’m fully obsessed with that one too

miss americana and the heartbreak prince is like full-on 2010 lana del rey but. like. better? and i liked 2010 lana del rey, so that’s A Lot

also like: conceptually i’m fascinated by this song

it’s so broad and so targeted at the same time

and it’s targeted at the entirety of the midwestern/southern united states

y’know

the places full of people who threw a tantrum when she went from country to pop

a lot of trump voters

etc

and it’s such a scalding assessment of the culture of these places

places where people unironically find high school to be the peak of their life

because they’re indoctrinated into the idea

and the way that intrinsically inward-facing mentality has and does fuel the us-vs-them mentality for teenagers that can grow right up into xenophobia

not to be like too serious on main or whatever but like

f a s c i n a t i n g

also disclaimer that i am from one of those places so. like. don’t @ me

also like musically it’s SO GOOD

the way it’s so restrained the whole time and it’s always on the edge of building up and blowing out but even when it does it’s still just this big heavy sound that sounds like it’s trying to blow up into something bigger but it never does and instead it just keeps slogging on and moving along but never moving forward is just aldkjfslk;jf

i’m a sucker for juxtaposition of content and sound but i’m also just as much a sucker for content and sound tying perfectly to each other and honestly this song is the best example of that sing kacey musgraves’ merry go round

which you should also listen to if you haven’t yet fyi but also like: it’s sad. be ready to be sad

seriously paper fucking rings though

b o p

bop bop bop

i think i almost poked out my girlfriend’s eye bc i was trying to dance to it in an airplane seat

it’s such a fucking bop

also seriously cruel summer i am obsessed with that song

i’m such a slut for jack antonoff’s production

and also for annie clark’s production

throw that all together into a taylor swift song and what doesn’t kill me makes me want you more and i love you ain’t that the worst thing you’ve ever heard ASD;FKLJASL;KFJS

anyways

for all that there are ballads a-plenty

lover!

the archer!

cornelia street!

this whole album is just like a sixty minute bop from start to finish

that’s it that’s my thesis

bop bop bop

bop

b o p

!!!!!

#Anonymous

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suit-lady · 7 years

Text

Lookin’ for a Boyfriend.

Pairing: Peter Parker x Reader

Summary: Requested by the legendary Charissa aka @toms-spidey: "someone write me a peter fic based on boyfriend by big time rush” Alternatively, Peter asks you to be his lab partner, but he ends up asking a little more.

Warnings: None? I think the worst swear is heck. Uh, unless you want nervous Peter as a warning because Peter is VERY nervous.

Word Count: 2250

A/N: It was an honour to write this for you, Charissa. I really hope you like it! Also, I listened to Boyfriend on repeat for like two and a half plus hours while writing this, so... If you’d like to listen while you read, you can find it here.

There she was. (Y/N), in all her glory, walked down the hall past Peter and Ned. Though he and Ned had been in the middle of discussing their next sci-fi movie night, Peter stopped mid-sentence as his eyes followed (Y/N). Ned sighed heavily. Why on earth had Peter started noticing a girl that was around them all the time? Liz was fine because they didn’t see the seniors much, as sophomores, but (Y/N) was in their class. Not only did she have classes in the same wing, the three of them were in the very same chemistry class. No, Ned didn’t think it was ironic.

“Dude, come on,” Ned drew Peter’s eyes from (Y/N) with a heavy sigh. “You’ve talked to her like three times.”

“That’s not true!” Peter retaliated, bristling. “We spent a whole week working on that chemistry lab together when you were out sick…”

Ned rolled his eyes. “You’re gonna have to do better than that.” Then, a lightbulb went off in his head. “Y’know… we’re starting a new lab in class today…”

Peter’s eyes widened. “No.” After Ned started wiggling his eyebrows, he repeated, “No. Ned, no.”

As they walked into class, Ned gave him a wink before walking up to a friend in one of his other classes. “Hey man, can we be lab partners for this next lab? Neither Peter nor I are great at this, so we wanna split up for this one.”

Unaware of Peter going into a panic behind Ned, the guy answered, “Oh, sure! Of course! Titration is one of my favorite things; I’d be more than glad to help you out.”

Peter swallowed the lump that had formed in his throat before he crossed the room. “(Y/N),” he started, but his words got caught in his throat.

“Yes?” you said, turning to face him. Peter could have sworn the sunlight bent around your body to make you literally sparkle.

His palms immediately felt clammy and his throat went dry. “I was wondering if maybe you would possibly…” he trailed off. He was beyond tongue-tied.

“Uh, if you’re asking to be lab partners, I’d love to be! I usually partner with my friend from trig class, but she’s not here today. I was actually gonna ask you…” He wouldn’t bet on it, but he thought he saw you blush a tiny bit.

“Yeah, actually! That’s exactly what I was gonna ask,” he said, the words falling out of his mouth at a rate alarming to even him.

You laughed, blushing a bit as you said, “You’re cute, Parker.”

He turned his face away from you so you wouldn’t see his face turn bright red. On most occasions, he really hated having the safety goggles, but the green tint helped to hide the fact that his skin never quite went back to its regular shade. You were so sweet, and working with you was incredibly easy; the two of you were done with the lab with plenty of time to spare and begin the report. Peter could feel himself falling head over heels for you as the hour went by all too quickly. When the bell rang, Peter slung his bag over his shoulder, but you stopped him from leaving.

“Hey, Peter?”

“Yeah? What’s up, (Y/N)?”

“Uh, I was just gonna ask… when do you wanna work on the report? I know you’re busy with the Stark internship and stuff, so I can totally do it myself.”

“No!” he said, shaking his head. “I’m not gonna blow off schoolwork, especially not a lab report. I’m usually free for a bit after school because I can catch the four o’clock train home.”

You smiled at him, dazing him. “Okay, that works! After school today in the library?”

Peter nodded. “Sounds great!” He turned and walked out to meet Ned, his giddiness unmistakable.

School creeped by. During the last hour of the day, it honestly seemed worse than waiting to go put on the spidey suit. He was tapping his foot as silently as he could as the anticipation nearly ate him alive. As soon as the bell rang, he leapt out of his seat and hurried to his locker to grab his chemistry notebook. Ned met him there, and they walked to the library together. With a wink, Ned bid him goodbye, and Peter watched him go before walking in.

He immediately saw your friends, but didn’t see her with them. With the utmost caution, he walked up to them. These people were (Y/N)’s closest pals; if he needed anyone’s approval, it would be theirs. Without meaning to, he caught a bit of their conversation as we walked up.

“I mean, I don’t really think he’s all that great, know what I mean?” one commented with a scoff.

“I know. I’m pretty sure she only said yes to him because he’s half nice. It’s not like she wouldn’t have her fair pick. She’s so nice, anybody would go out with her.”

“Sure, but it’s probably weird for her that we all go out on group dates and she’s, like, the ninth wheel or whatever.”

“Uhm, excuse me,” Peter said, cringing at his own voice.

They turned to him, one responding, “’Sup, Parker?”

“Uh, well, (Y/N) and I… we’re working on a chemistry report together?”

Before he could continue, another said, “Yeah, she’s with Brady right now.”

Brady… Brady Taylor? Peter gave them a tight lipped smile and a nod and he spun on his heel and walked away. If Brady Taylor, genius and basketball player, was interested in her, he had absolutely no chance. He began spreading out his things with a slightly moody air. He noticed slightly too late that he was still within earshot of your friends.

“I don’t think she even likes him?”

“She doesn’t. She’s never been into people that do sports.”

“Yeah, last year, wasn’t she really into that one guy with all the cool gadgets? He’s a senior now?”

The first laughed. “Yeah, she’s into the dweeby dudes.”

Dweeby? Ouch. This guy kind of sounded like… well, Peter.

“I wouldn’t say dweeby,” the first came to the guy’s defense. “He does some really neat stuff. She would always say she liked to listen to him talk about all that… God, if only he’d’ve known how smitten she was with him…”

“Peter, hey!” your voice pulled him out of his thoughts. “Sorry I’m late, I was…”

“With Brady? Your friends told me,” he said with a half-smile and a nod over to where your friends were still sitting and gossiping.

A blush creeped up on your face. “I-it’s not what you’re thinking. He gives me a ride home sometimes when I don’t wanna take the train. I only told my friends we went out so they would stop badgering me. Would I like a boyfriend? Sure, whatever. But I’d prefer one that’s a little less self-absorbed, y’know?”

They shared a quiet laugh before getting to work. After a bit, your friends came over to say they were headed out, and you said goodbye to them, telling them you weren’t quite finished yet. It was pretty close to when Peter would need to leave to make the train, but you told him you wanted to get as much of the report done that night as possible. Though he tried not to show it, he was just a little over the moon that you chose working with him over riding home with your friends.

You had a few things to do both Tuesday and Wednesday, so the only open evening to finish up the report was Thursday night, the night before it was due. That night, however, May was going to be baking date loaves and wanted Peter home to aid her. When he’d asked you if you could study at the apartment, he was sure he’d never stuttered so much in your life. You’d ecstatically agreed, curious about his aunt’s baking… and you’d developed quite the crush on Peter Parker.

The two of you were seated at the little booth by the kitchen, chemistry notes spread all over the table. Finally, you were on the last and hardest part, discussion of theory, or finding quotes in the notes or the text that gave information about the experiment. May was in the kitchen, busily making baked goods for some of her work friends. You could tell where Peter got his sweet nature from, and it wasn’t from the date loaves.

Though you finished the report in the early evening, May offered to have you stay for dinner. Peter’s heart leapt into his throat when you accepted, but he did his best to keep his cool. After all, this was just, like, a family dinner with a friend or whatever. This was totally nothing more than that to Peter. He was totally not a nervous wreck all of dinner, nope. Try as he might, he couldn’t quench his dry mouth and drank nearly a whole bottle of water at dinner. Neither you nor May noticed anything was off, but Peter felt as if his heart was beating loud enough for the downstairs neighbors to hear.

Though you left soon after dinner, you didn’t leave Peter’s mind all night, and he struggled to fall asleep. You were single, but maybe didn’t wanna be? Honestly, he was shocked that someone hadn’t made a move on you yet. How could someone not have? To him, you were absolutely gorgeous, impossibly kind, incredibly funny… Like, what more could people want?

“Peter, just heckin’ ask her out before I go insane,” Ned told him the next morning as they walked to their chemistry class.

“Ned, buddy, you know I can’t.”

“You can! Also, don’t sit next to me. Sit by your lab partner when you turn the lab in, okay?”

Peter’s cheeks flushed pink when they walked into the classroom. Though he knew Ned was trying to be helpful, forcing him to be around you was driving him crazy. He thought the onslaught of daydreams couldn’t get any worse, but he was zoning out of class with thoughts of you more than he was with memories of his adventures as Spider-Man. Maybe Ned was right.

During class, you didn’t say anything to one another, but Peter stopped you on your way out, calling your name. “Hey, (Y/N), wait.”

“Yeah?”

“Uhm…” Come on, think of an excuse. “I think some of our notes got mixed up last night? I’m pretty sure I’m missing some stuff from lecture last week…” Nice.

You flashed him one of those smiles that dazzled him. “Oh! Wanna sort stuff out after school? Is the library okay again?”

Peter nodded, smiling back. “Of course.”

The day had gone by far too fast. Why did he make such a brash decision? He knew he had all of his notes; they’d checked that before you’d left the night before. He was banking on the fact you thought he was forgetful… or, maybe, you were and didn’t quite remember sorting notes before dinner. While it was plausible, Peter’s anxiety was telling him otherwise.

You sorted notes as soon as you got there. To Peter’s surprise, you actually did have one of his pages of lecture exercises from the last week. You shared a laugh when you found it, and you told him that he had a really good eye. Though he knew he thanked you, he barely heard the noise leave his mouth because of the multitude of thoughts buzzing in his head.

When you stood up to leave, Peter stopped you, again. “(Y/N), wait.”

You gave him a look of confusion. “What is it, Peter?”

“Uhm…” he gave an awkward cough. “I haven’t really rehearsed saying this… Okay, I’ll be honest, I didn’t even think I was gonna do this until chemistry this morning…”

His pause was long. “Okay…?”

“Okay, I’m gonna do my best to make this unique to anything you’ve heard from anyone else.” He rubbed the back of his neck with his hand, trying to calm his nerves. “Well, uh, (Y/N), over the past few months, I just haven’t been able to help myself but notice how effortlessly beautiful and funny and all-around amazing that you are.” His face was bright red, which brought a small smile to your face. He was unbelievably nervous. “And, I, uh, well, Ned convinced me to switch partners so that I could have more time to talk to you… And, well, it’s done nothing to change my overall opinion of you… In fact, I stand by it even more that you’re an incredible girl and I just… I…” He took a deep breath. “Look, I know we’re not super close or whatever, and I don’t know your past and all that, but none of that really matters to me…” He chewed on his lip for a moment. “Well, I uh… I… Would you maybe wannagoonadatewithme?” The last several words blurted so quickly Peter had barely understood himself.

Your smile widened, and a short laugh left your lips. “Peter,” you started.

“Oh no. Oh, no, no, you know what? Never mind; this didn’t happen. I, uh, I gotta go catch the train.”

“Peter,” you said, more firmly this time, grabbing his arm for emphasis. “I would love to.”

A week later, Peter overheard your friends again, talking about how much they approved of her new boyfriend. The smile those comments brought didn’t leave his face for the rest of the day.

Fin.

Tag List: @toms-spidey, @hollandaised, @trackingthislamp, @softnerdypeter, @sachiparker, @tomfooleryholland, @lgbt-avengers, @peterfuckinparker, @peterfightmeparker, @peterandchurros

#i...love this #peter parker #spider-man: homecoming #peter parker x reader #peter parker imagine #my shit #as promised!! two fics before bed HA!#i hope you like it charissa i had so much fun bopping to boyfriend while i wrote this

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smash-all-mirrors · 7 years

Text

@nerdypenguintyphoon this is fun I don’t want to stop, I like guessing what you’d answer

1. Would you have sex with the last person you text messaged? It was me and I’m gonna say it’s a hard pass 2. You talked to an ex today, correct? No, I can say no with complete confidence 3. Have you taken someones virginity? I mean I had lot of firsts with you but I don’t think that is what the question is asking 4. Is trust a big issue for you? Too trusting I think 5. Did you hang out with the person you like recently? You like everyone or something so probably 6. What are you excited for? To visit me….in like 500 years 7. What happened tonight? um you rejected me a lot. lots and lots. And like nothing too exciting at night 8. Do you think it’s disgusting when girls get really wasted? I hope not because we’re drinking together and like I’m super competitive 9. Is confidence cute? You always yell at me for not being confident so I guess you must like it 10. What is the last beverage you had? coffee 11. How many people of the opposite sex do you fully trust? trust for what??? I assume a bunch like you have zero trust issues so 12. Do you own a pair of skinny jeans? Yes, but I only know because you told me 13. What are you gonna do Saturday night? I don’t know, but like drunk driving probably 14. What are you going to spend money on next? coffee, like I swear you buy every day so like a safe guess 15. Are you going out with the last person you kissed? You will be when you get someone to kiss, but like kiss properly, like open mouthed 16. Do you think you’ll change in the next 3 months? I guess this question means like attitude of life choices but like I know you’ll change your clothes at least. maybe some more colours like purple or something 17. Who do you feel most comfortable talking to about anything? Your BFF I guess. 18. The last time you felt broken? When you got a 26 on your exam 19. Have you had sex today? Mentally masturbating all day I’m sure 20. Are you starting to realize anything? well you said that you no longer feel the need for a gf that much anymore soooooooo 21. Are you in a good mood? always 22. Would you ever want to swim with sharks? No risk attitude 23. Are your eyes the same color as your dad’s? yeah why not 24. What do you want right this second? Better internet connection and on time train service and an open bar 25. What would you say if the person you love/like kissed another girl/boy? Wow I didn’t think you were straight 26. Is your current hair color your natural hair color? Yes 27. Would you be able to date someone who doesn’t make you laugh? I don’t know if you will ever get someone to date you since you’re so fussy 28. What was the last thing that made you laugh? Me. def 29. Do you really, truly miss someone right now? Uhhhhhhhhhh sure why not 30. Does everyone deserve a second chance? I dunno but you give everyone you know a second chance so does it matter if they deserve it? 31. Honestly, do you hate the last boy you were talking to? You probably didn’t them that well so no 32. Does the person you have feelings for right now, know you do? hahahahahaha no you never say like 100% sure they don’ know 33. Are you one of those people who never drinks soda? Yes. strictly soda free 34. Listening to? My voice 35. Do you ever write in pencil anymore? No only in pen and marker 36. Do you know where the last person you kissed is? hahahahahahahah 37. Do you believe in love at first sight? Probably you’re a huge fuckin sap 38. Who did you last call? Me, again. We spend a lot of time together 39. Who was the last person you danced with? …you dance too? What? I don’t know? Uni friends I guess 40. Why did you kiss the last person you kissed? Well you reminded me it was the graduation story but like yeah 41. When was the last time you ate a cupcake? You like never eat sweets so maybe it was Austria 42. Did you hug/kiss one of your parents today? You saw them so I hope so 43. Ever embarrass yourself in front of a crush? Yes, you embarrass yourself in front of everyone so like all of them def 44. Do you tan in the nude? yes it’s your fav activity /s 45. If you could, would you take back your last kiss? Probably 46. Did you talk to someone until you fell asleep last night?Yes omg learn to say goodnight and stop falling asleep on me 47. Who was the last person to call you? you test friends usually so like…me? 48. Do you sing in the shower? You sing everywhere so i would be surprised if you didn’t 49. Do you dance in the car? If you’re doing karaoke I guess it kinda makes sense? but like I imagine nor because you’re kinda self conscious 50. Ever used a bow and arrow? no you’re too klutzy please don’t 51. Last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer? a portrait???? I dunno like probably passport? 52. Do you think musicals are cheesy? You think everything is cheesy 53. Is Christmas stressful? Yes, 54. Ever eat a pierogi? Yeah they’re good, if you haven’t had one it’s a shame 55. Favorite type of fruit pie? mmm lemon? 56. Occupations you wanted to be when you were a kid? a professional bed tester 57. Do you believe in ghosts? They’re all over the old testament and like i never got if there was a difference between the holy spirit and ghosts you’re like the worst person to ask for some reason 58. Ever have a Deja-vu feeling? Yes. So don’t be mean 59. Take a vitamin daily? no, not at all 60. Wear slippers?Yeah isn’t that like super European thing? 61. Wear a bath robe? Yeah like you’re cold 24/7 and need a coat when no one else does 62. What do you wear to bed? did you buy non ugly pjs yet? 63. First concert? Rossinni ahahahah jokes i dunno that guy who plays 14 instruments or the choir thing? 64. Wal-Mart, Target or Kmart? Uhhh do you have any of those? You know what Wal-mart is for sure so that one 65. Nike or Adidas? the rhythm of the night 66. Cheetos Or Fritos? Dafuq is fritos omg 67. Peanuts or Sunflower seeds? Peanuts but not butter because that weird 68. Favorite Taylor Swift song? Uh you sent one once and I don’t remember was it the reputation one but it was like a parody and it wouldn’t load so I don’t know. I also don’t care about her at all and she can disappear forever and I wouldn’t care 69. Ever take dance lessons? let’s say no 70. Is there a profession you picture your future spouse doing? professional rock climber or something similarly exciting 71. Can you curl your tongue? Probably you make all sorts or strange r noises 72. Ever won a spelling bee? spelling bee? for spelling? I think this would be too much on the stuff you already do so 73. Have you ever cried because you were so happy? sure 74. What is your favorite book? fantasy…..fantasy….I feel like a stereotype saying HP though 75. Do you study better with or without music? with…..ooo,,,,uuu,,,t,ttt 76. Regularly burn incense? mmm no 77. Ever been in love? hahahahahaha all the time 78. Who would you like to see in concert? Justin Bieber 79. What was the last concert you saw? That french one? I don’t remember 80. Hot tea or cold tea? cold tea, specifically summer tea 81. Tea or coffee? depends why but coffee culture is huge for you 82. Favorite type of cookie? computer cookies 83. Can you swim well? sure yeah 84. Can you hold your breath without holding your nose? Is that like impossible for some people????? 85. Are you patient? hahahahahah yes def 100% except when you aren’t and want to be alone 86. DJ or band, at a wedding? Bands 87. Ever won a contest? Yeah….probably some awards too 88. Ever have plastic surgery? Nooo….? 89. Which are better black or green olives? why should anyone have to choose but green 90. Opinions on sex before marriage? Not for you but y’know 91. Best room for a fireplace? The room you are most frequently in to warm you up 92. Do you want to get married? Sure yeah sounds nice

questions taken from http://jreadhd.tumblr.com/post/162033692079/make-me-admit-stuff

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acabecca · 7 years

Note

“Have you lost your damn mind!?” Cal x Felicity

Felicitywas running around her apartment like a tornado and it was making Ethan alittle bit dizzy. He had never seen her move so fast, and he had neverwitnessed anyone make so many changes to their home as Felicity had in fewhours it had been since she’d had the news that she could bring Matilda home.

Everythinghad been baby-proofed (despite the fact that Matilda could barely sit up on herown yet, never mind anything else), the sofa which had been in the middle ofthe room had been pushed over to the furthest wall to make room the babybouncer that Matilda loved.

Thespare room had been transformed, emptied of its clutter and filled witheverything Matilda needed – her Moses basket, the cot Ethan and Cal had boughtonly a couple of weeks earlier, a brand new changing table, a little set ofdrawers for her every-growing collection of clothes… It was like a completelydifferent apartment. They had both worked together to make it the bestenvironment for Matilda.

Andyet, still, Felicity was still furiously cleaning everything in sight.

“…Youknow, that’s the third time you’ve cleaned that window?”

Shepaused, cloth and spray in hand as she cocked her head to the side and examinedthe window in front of her, before she turned to look at Ethan.

“Isit?”

“Yes,”he smiled. “You can stop cleaning now, Felicity. You’ve got everything. Thereisn’t one speck of dirt, one tiny little germ left in the whole place. Matildais going to be fine.”

“Ofcourse she’s going to be fine, why wouldn’t she be fine?” Felicity bristled.“I’m just cleaning!”

“Becauseyou’re nervous, which is perfectly understandable. It’s okay to be nervous,”Ethan told her. “But she’s okay now. They wouldn’t be discharging her if shewasn’t.”

“Iknow, I just-” she sighed, running a hand through her messy hair. “I wanteverything to be perfect, y’know? I want her to feel at home. She’s gone frombeing with you and Cal, to being in hospital and now she’s coming here and I’mjust- I’m worried she won’t settle.”

“Felicity,”Ethan stood up, giving her a small smile and placing his hands on hershoulders. “You live down the hall from us. The apartment is laid out the sameway, she has all her things here now… She’s a baby, she’s not going to noticethe difference.”

“She’sgoing to notice Cal not being here though,” Felicity muttered, pushing a pieceof her hair behind her ear as Ethan frowned.

Itwas going to be weird, he had to admit, having Matilda so close all the timebut not having her living with them. He had grown quite attached to her and,even though he now knew she wasn’t his niece biologically, he would alwaysconsider himself to be her uncle.

Hehad been shocked at first when Felicity had confessed to him that she’d spokento Matilda’s social worker and had applied to be her carer, but he had beenthrilled when she had gotten the okay to foster her.

“Speakingof Cal…” he paused. “Have you told him yet?”

Felicitywinced. “Define told him.”

“Felicity,”Ethan groaned. “She’s coming home tomorrow.Don’t you think you should tell him? I mean, he’s going to notice you luggingaround a baby, isn’t he?”

“Well,technically Cal and I aren’t even really speaking at the moment, so there’sthat,” she shrugged her shoulders. “Maybe youshould tell him! He’d take it much better coming from you, Ethan!”

“Oh,no,” Ethan quickly shook his head, taking a step away from her. “No. I’m nottelling him.”

“Butyou’re-!” Felicity stopped, interrupted by a pounding on the front door and shejumped, turning to look towards the door with wide eyes. “I am not answering that,” she told Ethan in awhisper.

“Filly!Open the damn door!”

Shewhined, clutching on to Ethan’s arm when she realised Cal was on the other sideof the door.

“Iam definitely not answering that.”

“Felicity!”

Ethansighed heavily, pinching the bridge of his nose before he shook Felicity offand walked towards the front door. Pulling it open, he held a hand up towardshis brother.

“Cal,if you could just-”

“Getout of my way,” Cal growled, pushing past Ethan and storming towards the livingroom. Ethan was in two minds about whether to follow him, or to slip out of thedoor unnoticed and leave them to it, but he knew that Felicity would probablynever forgive him if he did that. Gently closing the front door, he turned onhis heel and followed Cal back into the apartment, where he found his brotherstood in the middle of the room with clenched fists, as Felicity lookedanywhere but at him. “Ethan. Can you leave, please? I need to talk toFelicity.”

“Staywhere you are!” she squeaked, pointing a finger at Ethan. “You understand whyI’m doing this, you need to stay!” she told him, instantly regretting it thesecond Ethan screwed his eyes shut and Cal spun round to face him.

“Youknow?”

“Well…Yes, I-”

“Youknew she was doing this, and you didn’t tell me?”

“Itwasn’t my place to tell you, Cal-”

“Thenwho’s place was it?” he snapped. “Really! Which one of you were going to tellme that the baby I’ve been raising as my daughter was going to be living a fewdoors down for me? Or were you both hoping I wouldn’t notice you playing happyfamilies? Honestly, Felicity, have you lost your damn mind!?”

“Wh-”she frowned, crossing her arms over her chest. “No, I haven’t lost my ‘damnmind’. Someone needs to be there for her, Cal. Someone needs to take care ofher and it clearly wasn’t going to be you anymore. I couldn’t just abandon her,I couldn’t let her go into care and be given to people she doesn’t even know.She’s so little, Cal. She’s so tiny and fragile and seeing her lying there inthe hospital… I knew I couldn’t leave her.”

“What,and I’m some kind of monster who just walked away from her?”

“Ididn’t- I did say that-”

“Butit’s what you’re thinking?”

“…Cal-”

“Ethan,leave!” he snapped, and Ethan turned to glance at Felicity who nodded her headat him. Walking to the doorway, Ethan paused before he left the apartment.

“Cal?”he called. “She’s only doing what she thinks is best for Matilda. You can’tblame her for that.”

Caldidn’t reply. He didn’t even look in Ethan’s direction, and he waited until heheard the front door close before he looked back at Felicity. She bit down onher bottom lip, noticing that Cal’s anger had faded slightly as he sat down onher sofa, his head in his hands as he stared at the floor. She walked towardshim, sitting beside him tentatively and waiting for him to say something.

“Howcome you didn’t tell me?” he whispered.

“I-I was scared too,” she admitted weakly and Cal looked up at her. “I didn’t knowhow to tell you. I know how hurt you were when you found out she wasn’t yours,you’ve not been the same since and I didn’t want to add to that but… I couldn’tjust leave her, Cal. I can’t explain it. I’ve got such a bond with her, I loveher to bits and I couldn’t let her go.”

“…Doyou think it was easy for me? Walking away?”

“Ofcourse I don’t,” Felicity frowned. “I was there, remember? I know how hard itwas for you and for Ethan. Don’t bemad at him, by the way. I didn’t… I couldn’t really talk to anyone else andhe’s like… He’s my best friend, y’know? He’s the person I go to about stuff. Iswore him to secrecy before I even told him anything, so please don’t blame himfor anything.”

“Idon’t blame him,” Cal told her. “Of course I don’t blame him. He never wantedme to give up on her, he wanted to stay in her life. I… I don’t blame you,either. I blame me.”

“Wellyou shouldn’t. You should blame Taylor,”Felicity scowled. “She knew Matilda wasn’t your baby, Cal. She knew and sheleft her here anyway, that woman doesn’t have a decent bone in her body. Shecouldn’t have honestly expected you not todo a paternity test after all the trouble she caused and the lies she told! Sheknew you’d find out but she still just lefther baby here expecting you to take care of her even though she isn’t yours-”

“That’snot stopped you from stepping up,” Cal cut in. “The fact that she isn’t yourbaby. It’s not stopped you from being like a parent to her, has it? Maybe…Maybe you’re just a better person than I am, Filly.”

“Well,”she scoffed, reaching out to pat his leg. “We already knew that anyway, didn’twe?” she teased, and Cal smiled weakly, placing his hand on top of hers.

“I’mserious,” he told her, lacing their fingers together and looking back up ather, the blush on her cheeks not going unnoticed. “You were so ready to helpEthan and I when we first had Matilda. You dropped everything to take care ofher-”

“Youhired me to be her nanny didn’t you, I was getting paid for it.”

“Butyou’re not now, are you? And you’re still going to do it, you’re still going tolook after her. It’s… It’s not even just that though, Filly. It’s the way youtook care of me, of Ethan… You were always there, always helping, alwayslistening to us complain. You always have. Even… Even before Matilda.”

“We’refriends,” Felicity shrugged weakly. “Ethan is my best friend. Friends help each other out.”

“Friends?”

“Yeah?”she frowned in confusion, and Cal gave her hand a squeeze. “…Cal-”

“Ineed to ask you something,” he blurted out before he could stop himself.

Hedidn’t know why, but Felicity had always made him feel… nervous. He wasn’t hisusual, cocky self around her. He had been, at first. When they’d bump into eachin the lift and she was nothing more than the girl down the hall who wasfriends with Ethan. He had flirted past himself, giving her a cheeky commentand a wink whenever he saw her and taking great delight in the blush that wouldcover her cheeks, or the fond smile that would cross her lips as she rolled hereyes at him. It had changed when Matilda had come into his life and she wasaround all the time. It wasn’t just flirting anymore. Not for Cal, anyway, andhe was sure not for Felicity, either.

“Shoot,”she told him, chewing nervously on her thumbnail.

“Whatdoes…? I mean, where do we- what I meanis-” Cal stuttered, pausing to huff loudly and take a breath. “Where does thisleave us, Filly?”

Felicity’sfrown deepened. “Us?”

“Imean…” Cal started, pausing to try and find the right words to say. “Yeah, us?Because I- I don’t think I can be around her, Filly. Around Matilda. Not for…It’s going to take me a while before I can be around her. It hurt too much tofind out she wasn’t mine, to let her go… I need some time before I can bearound her again.”

“So…What?” Felicity pulled her hand out of his. “What are you trying to say? Are…Are you trying to ask me to choose betweenyou and Tilly?”

“No,I-”

“Becauseyou won’t win, Cal. I will choose her. I will always choose her.”

Calnarrowed his eyes. “That’s not what I was trying to say, but it’s nice to knowwhere I stand,” he scoffed.

“Ican’t believe you’re being so selfish!” she laughed in disbelief. “What am I saying?Of course I can. I just can’t fathomhow that would even cross your mind right now? How can you even think aboutthat when there’s a baby you supposedly loved, a baby you cared for lying inhospital but no parents? And you have the nerve to ask about us?”

“Nevermind,” Cal grumbled. “Forget I said anything. I guess I’ll just… See youaround.”

“Iguess you will,” Felicity nodded, crossing her arms over her chest.

“Therewas never really going to be an ‘us’anyway, was there?” he asked. “You were just the nanny, after all.”

Felicitysucked in a breath, and Cal instantly regretted his words when he saw the flashof hurt in her eyes. He’d thought that was what he wanted in that moment, tohurt her, but the second he realised that’s what he had done, he was overcomewith guilt.

“Getout.”

“Filly,I didn’t mean-”

“Youknow what, Cal?” she shot him a glare. “It’s a good job you don’t want to seeher, because I don’t want to be around someone who could give up on a child soeasily. Get out of my apartment.”

Pullingthe front door open with a scowl, Cal stepped outside before turning back tolook at her.

“Gladly,”he snapped, slamming the door closed behind him and, without looking back once,Cal walked away.

#lmao wtf i'm crying the end is so bad whoops #casualty #bbc casualty #cal knight #ethan hardy #??? kind of I guess #cal x felicity #fic: ignite #prompts: ignite #answered #kolmiikaelsons #I always get so nervous posting these man I always feel like someone is gonna shout at me for using the casualty tag lol

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fragiilexa · 7 years

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1 - 10

identity ask………oh shit ACCEPTING

1. if someone wanted to really understand you, what would they read, watch, and listen to?

Hm, well I guess this is three questions omg but I’ll just go down the line. If they wanted to really understand me they’d have to read the Bible, which I know is saying a lot in one thing. But the reason I am the way I am is because of the things I’ve learned from that book and I would not be who I am without it. Of course I actually haven’t been able to read the whole thing yet but I take a lot of who I am from it & it’s just something that’s shaped me as a person? Oh but also I really don’t read books much anymore, but if I had to give another one it would be The Last Song? Maybe? ( The book is better than the movie, even tho I like the movie, the books better ) It just talks a lot about forgiveness & stuff and it was a lesson I really needed to learn at the time I read it & also am still learning. OH and also Crazy Love by Francis Chan, which is like a christian book, but it’s also had a huge impact on me, okay but onto watchin’.

Okay this is hard because there isn’t one full thing you could watch where the whole thing has impacted me. But there are a lot of movies I’ve learned from, ( and also since this doesn’t say specifically movies ) there are also a few speeches that I’ve really learned from ( and people would probably be able to understand me better if they watched them. But I can’t name those right now? But, I’d have to say, like, not as a whole, but Dr. Who, at least some specific episodes. Uh, Captain America?? The Help? There are more but I have a hard time naming movies/shows.

Okay and then music, fricken music, okay I could put so so so so many songs down, songs are like the soul of my life & help make me, me BUT I’m just going to give you ONE because if I didn’t this would go on forever and TWO it’s kind of my theme song but I Was Here, by the queen Beyonce. Is like, hands down my favorite *what makes me, me* song. I could name a lot more. I could make a 24 hour long playlist. But I won’t bc that would take forever.

2. have you ever found a writer who thinks just like you? if so, who?

Yes, There have been a few and most of them are not on anymore but, Kae I think I can solidly say we think very similarly on just, like, how to develop muses, how to work out characters and how REAL they’re supposed to be, you know? Characters can, and should have flaws and no one has tons of perfect relationships. Real life is messy & writing should reflect that & I think we are just hella synced with that message & feeling and she’s just lovely so yeah @spookylip is bae & we think alike ( obviously bc we took those selfies that matched wITHOUT EVEN KNOWING ) we are #one

3. list your fandoms and one character from each that you identify with.

Girl Meets World: Riley Matthews.Glee: Tina Cohen - Chang.Marvel: Captain America, Steve Rogers.Hamilton: Eliza or Peggy SchyulerDisney: HeiHei ( no just kidding ) Moana, Princess Anna, Rapunzel,Harry Potter: Newt ScamanderStar Wars: FinnMy Little Pony: ( don’t u dare judge ) FlutterShyTwilight: Alice Cullen

4. do you like your name? is there another name you think would fit you better?

Okay so I used to not like my name so much ‘cause it was really bland & there were a lot of other girls named rebecca when I was in school, then people started calling me rachel so it was like ‘my name is totally forgettable’ ( or i was i dunno ) but over the past few years I’ve started to love it, though someone ruINED the meaning of it for me *side eyes that kinky anon* but I don’t really care & I love my name now, just, never ever call me becky or I will murder u in ur sleep. :))))

5. do you think of yourself as a human being or a human doing? do you identify yourself by the things you do?

I was slightly confused reading this but I re-read it & now I get it. I think at the moment, or for the longest time I’ve been a human being, like, there are just no opportunities right now for me to be doing what others my age are, or even younger than me. Not only that but I have to work on a lot of anxieties of mine, but that being said I don’t think I’m doing nothing. What I’m doing is small, yeah, but I try to do the best I can with what I have & I have a lot of faith that things happen for a reason & right now I’m keeping things going in my family & trying to better myself, no matter how many downsides that has, sort of. & I do Identify myself by the things I do, mostly because in doing something you have the opportunity to help someone. I try to do the right things, sometimes I do, sometimes I don’t but it’s a daily thing, y’know?

6. are you religious/spiritual?

Yah. You can see that with some of my answers but I am, though I know right now a lot of people assume that if you’re religious ( especially christian, on this site at least ) that it automatically means you’re this, this & this *insert any form of ism or phobic term* but that’s really not how it works. We’re all sinners & no matter what that still doesn’t change the way God feels about us ( no matter what, we, as humans think is sin, or sinful ) I could go on a lot about this topic, honestly it’s a big part of who I am. But personally, I love God, I have a personal relationship with him that I try to work on daily & grow with him daily, my God is all loving and I just wished more people my age, or at least people on here knew that?? I dunno, there’s just so much rhetoric surrounding Christianity & most of it is wrong & I just??? Mmmm I’m getting off topic but yes! I am! It’s like a huge part of what keeps me going, I love Jesus.

7. do you care about your ethnicity?

YES. Oh my Gosh yeah, okay well I’m white, lmao, but where I come from is still like, really important to me. It used to not be. I actually used to be kind of… not ashamed but embarrassed when my Mom did really dutch things. Like, ok backing up, My grandpa moved here from the Netherlands when he was in his early teens around the time that the holocaust happened, though I couldn’t give you the exact date because I’m hella forgetful but he came with his parents and he met my Grandma and u know the deal it goes down the line. But anyways I used to like, not like the things that came with being dutch, like, I just thought it was all stupid & silly, like clogs & doilies & stupid little things like my great grandma & grandpa always used to use forks & knives with everything because it was a custom where they came from & like, it’s all small things but over the years I’ve just learned to be really proud of where my family came from? My Grandpa went through a lot to come here, he saw a lot of things he never talked about and I didn’t know him well because I was young when he died but I just really love embracing my heritage there & stuff.

Like I’m white yes, and I’m basically a ‘mystery white’ ‘cause my dad is a mutt & my mom isn’t fully dutch either. I’m one of those 10% Irish 25% Hungarian 50% Dutch & 15% other type of whites, but??? I’m still proud of all of it?? Like I love learning about where I came from & who I am & I think everyone should be proud of all parts of their ethnicity. As Matthew Montgomery said: “ Love all your percentages. “

8. what musical artists have you most felt connected to over your lifetime?

shiT fam, this is getting so long & it’s gonna get longer, okay let me just do like… two, tha two tops…

Demi Lovato: Obviously, I mean… obviously She is one of the people I look up to most and I don’t know where I would be if I never had her & her music in my life. She’s taught me so much about strength and confidence and overcoming something when it looks like it will be impossible. She’s helpped me grow into someone who cares & wants to learn & help others and I just admire her so much for what she’s done, for herself, for others and for never giving up when she could have. Not to mention the ballads that have helped me through really hard times, or the speeches she’s given that remind me I’m strong & capable

Taylor Swift: *que everyone groaning who’s reading* anYWAYS I can’t even honestly write down or explain how many times that Taylor and her music has helped me when I felt like I wanted to give up, or how many times I have cried listening to songs that should not have resonated with me but did. She’s helped me to realize not only that I am important but that no matter what, despite what people may do to me, or make me feel that I’m still important and worth working on. She’s also shown me what goofing off can do to make you feel better, how not giving a shit has helped me move on from past relationships and how being unapologetically ME is okay

In fact, I feel like Demi’s taught me those things too. But they’ve both done it in different ways, which I think shows how beautiful loving yourself can be. Because you don’t have to love yourself how another person loves themselves. You have to figure out your own, unique way to view yourself & believe in yourself & love yourself & I think that’s just really beautiful. Now, they both hate each other ( or at least severely dislike one another ) but I just feel like they’ve both done so much for me and I don’t think I could thank either of them enough for showing me strength, beauty, confidence and love in the way they have. It’s insane how much of an impact people can have but they have. I could go on but I woont I promise.

9. are you an artist?

YES I am, though my skill can be debated I love drawing when I’m in the mood & painting & jst everything that has to do with art.

10. do you have a creed?

I don’t know if this means religious, or… otherwise… but I mean, technically I’m a baptist christian ( i think? not sure anymore ) but like, I am Christian, I feel like, sadly, the beliefs I hold are a bit left leaning & less erm, strict? When it comes to how I interpret the bible, where as a my family is different, I think? I don’t know, but I just try to follow the teachings of Jesus & his disciples. “ Love others as I have loved you - John 15:12 “ I do go by other teachings but I think that’s the top of my list. Jesus loves us unconditionally, he died for us, lived for us, and rose again so we didn’t have to burn up in hell for eternity. The least I can do is show everyone the same kind of unconditional love he’s showed me throughout my life & make sure people know that though we do sin & are inherently bad at heart, he still loves us despite our downfalls and doubt. I don’t know if that really answers this question but I had to look up creed & this is the best answer I came up with SO, thank u for sending this in and I love u

#THIS GOT SO LONG OOPS #BUT THANK U BLESS U I LOVE MEMES #smilerpc #⌘ ||▷ тalĸ тo мe вaвy ▹▹ ( ▨ ' answered by me. )

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