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biconickyoshi · 3 months

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Okay y’all… I was very critical of eps 3 & 4 (especially 4) of NAtLA. Then all of a sudden eps 5 & 6 kinda slapped me in the face with how much better the show suddenly got.

Spoiler-free thoughts first:

Zuko, Iroh, and Aang have cemented themselves as the best parts about this adaptation - which is really funny considering I’m currently writing a longfic AU where Zuko and Iroh discover Aang in the iceberg right after Zuko is banished at age 13 and end up becoming the first members of the Gaang (albeit reluctantly at first lol). Episode 6: “Masks” (the Blue Spirit adaptation) was so good, I’d venture to say that it actually improved and fleshed out some things from the original series.

Episode 5: “Spirited Away”, while not as good as E6, was not as bad as I heard people say it was going to be. I think that the changes they did make didn’t bother me nearly as much as the changes they made in the last episode, and it was actually entertaining.

There were several scenes that made me cry in both of these episodes (moreso in episode 6, which I’ll get into further down in the spoiler section). These are the scenes that I feel like really tapped into the heart of the original show rather than feeling like a soulless remake.

Now for my in-depth thoughts (INCLUDES SPOILERS):

EP 5: “Spirited Away”

- Staring out, I was bummed because I had just rewatched the first two eps of the original animated series lol.

- It was an interesting choice to have all three members of the Gaang get stuck in the Spirit World, but I think it worked.

- Wan Shi Tong just showing up randomly was a bit unnecessary, but I suppose it will be kinda interesting to see him again in S2 since he’s already met the Gaang

- Hei Bai plays a much smaller role in these eps, but I strangely didn’t mind that either?

- Seeing Katara’s last memory with her mom was devastating, especially the fact that she had to witness her death and hide in the igloo with Kya’s charred body :(( she definitely has severe PTSD.

- Even Sokka’s memory made me tear up a bit

- Koh being the villain and a soul-eater or whatever was a bit of an odd choice, but I guess I can see why they did it. I do prefer him just being an asshole who steals ppl’s faces lol

- Appreciated the Fog of Lost Souls reference from the LoK lore

- Aang reuniting with Gyatso made me cry. I know some people didn’t like him being in the Spirit World, but I really liked it. Also, the fact that Gyatso was the first person to tell Aang that it wasn’t his fault the Air Nomads died, and that if he had been there he would have died too? THANK YOU! My poor boy has been berated enough for “abandoning” the world.

- We got some interesting lore about the afterlife for humans from Gyatso and Aang’s convo, which we’ve never gotten in AtLA media before. Idk if it’s just for Air Nomads, but Aang mentions that Gyatso stayed behind instead of “seeking enlightenment”. I know that the end goal in Buddhism is to reincarnate until you eventually achieve nirvana, so I wonder if that’s what they were alluding to (I’m not an expert on religions so pls correct me if I’m wrong)

- Oh yeah, I forgot June is here lmao. As a queer person I loved her (bc beautiful goth woman) but I didn’t like the weird choice to make her hit on Iroh - I guess to contrast the Iroh being creepy towards her thing in the OG series. I wish they would have just had them interact normally tbh, no weird “flirting”

EP 6: “Masks”

- Here we go y’all. The best episode in the show so far and probably the best the show is gonna get this season. I’m still pretty shocked at how good this one was.

- I think the decision to include flashbacks to Zuko’s Agni Kai was a good decision here. It felt like an appropriate episode for them and the flashbacks were very well done.

- In general, Dallas is doing a phenomenal job at portraying a Zuko who is angry and aggressive, yes, but also so very sweet and compassionate at his core. I love when little inklings of his true self shine through.

- Roku was… not what I expected. He was very much more of a lighthearted and jokey person… I didn’t hate it, it was just unexpected lol. I wonder if they did that to contrast him with Kyoshi. Which, speaking of, I’m glad Roku clarified that Aang doesn’t just need to be a merciless warrior (and that he didn’t berate Aang for “abandoning” the world like she did). But I still am annoyed about the mischaracterization of Kyoshi in general.

- RIP Shyu :/

- Thought it was kind of strange how June captures Aang at Roku’s temple lol. Like how did she get on and off the island??

- Zhao continues to feel like a completely different character to me lmao. I think this version is pretty funny, but it’s so weird to see Zhao being portrayed as so goofy and incompetent when he was such an intimidating force and the main villain of Book 1 in the OG series. Just a weird direction they went with his character.

- The Yuyan archers look cool as fuck. 10/10 no notes

- Still not sure how I feel about Azula already being this insecure and jealous of Zuko. I think it makes her feel a bit more realistically like a child, but the whole point of Azula’s character is that she is really good at maintaining this cool and calm persona on the surface, which she uses to scare and manipulate people. I can see her maybe getting to a point later on to where she hardens herself into that though. We’ll see.

- Baby Zuko asking Iroh how he looks and his little smile 😭😭😭😭 I had a physical “aww” reaction to that. THAT’S MY SON (me and Iroh shouting in unison)

- War Room scene was handled very well. No complaints. I like how Ozai tried to test Zuko with battle strategies.

- Blue Spirit break out scene was extremely close to the original, and it was really good. They adapted it almost shot for shot with all the important parts.

- Here’s probably my favorite part of the episode: Zuko and Aang’s talk inside the abandoned house after they escape from Pohuai!!!!!! Gahhhh I could gush about this scene all day. I love how they expanded it to be an actual friendly conversation between Aang and Zuko. Like we get to see Zuko’s true self coming through - the sweet, kind boy we know he is. Zuko and Aang just have such great chemistry as well, wayyy more than Aang has with either Sokka or Katara. Like I adored them bonding over painting and caligraphy!!! I think this is the best acting we’ve seen from Gordon so far, and Dallas did a phenomenal job switching back to that hurt, angry version of himself (of course a trauma response). And the fact that Aang said “sorry, I didn’t mean to hurt you” when he blocked Zuko’s firebending attack??? My sweet boy 😭

- The final flashback to the Agni Kai was really well done too. I’d already heard Zuko fights back, which I wasn’t sure I’d like, but I actually didn’t mind it. I really liked that they showed Zuko’s hesitation whenever he did actually have an opening, and that was what angered Ozai the most - Zuko showing compassion, “weakness”. Daniel Dae Kim is of course doing a phenomenal job (no surprises there), and I really liked that Iroh actually attempted to stop Ozai at one point. It also looked like young Azula had tears in her eyes, which I again actually liked because it humanizes her.

- I loved that Aang was still there when Zuko woke up on the boat 😭 he wanted to make sure he was okay!! I full on started crying when we got the “do you think we could have been friends too?” lines from him. Again, Gordon killed it. I love how you can tell that Aang knows Zuko has been hurt and that’s why he acts the way he does. He doesn’t blame him for any of it. 10/10

- the last flashback to Zuko in his bed recovering from the burn… god the tears just kept flowing. I really liked the choice to have Ozai almost give Zuko a chance to like… idk understand why he did what he did, and how compassion is “weak”?? And then Zuko’s response to give people a chance 😭😭😭 as if I couldn’t love him any more!!! And then of course Ozai gets pissed. But seeing baby Zuko just cry in his bed UGH I’m dehydrated at this point

- Of course I can’t finish this review without mentioning the 41st division. What an incredible way to expand upon the source material by making them Zuko’s crew!!! It shows just how much Zuko truly cares about others and it moved me so much (once again to tears).

I don’t have high hopes for the last two episodes, but honestly, if this is what the live action can be, it gives me a bit of hope (at least for future seasons). I really think that Dallas, Gordon, Paul, and Daniel were the stars of this ep and are a big part of what made it so good.

#atla #natla #netflix atla spoilers #natla spoilers #atla live action #avatar the last airbender netflix #avatar the last airbender #atla netflix #atla meta #natla meta #zuko #aang #iroh #ozai #zukaang

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dawnagustd · 1 year

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the ironed blacksmith || jjk

The queen has made her list and checked it twice. She’s visiting those who have been naughty, and punishing them in ways that are oh so nice.

- Part of the Unholy Night Series.

The thing with Jungkook is…

These bitches are always trying to fix him. And every goddamn time, they end up broken. A pair of Bambi eyes, tattoos, and pouty lips have never gotten your attention. But tonight, you’ll give him a try.

You found the bitter blacksmith working hard on Christmas Eve while blasting his alternative rock to tune out the cheerful spirits of Heauxville. He answered the door with a scowl but couldn’t resist the urge to blow off some steam.

See, Jeon used to be a tiny kid. Some of the town’s most respected citizens used to bully him around. But those were the old days.

Now he’s larger, stronger, and a whole lot meaner. He also has a thing for treating the town’s residents like shit, especially the wives of the ones who put him through hell. They allow Jungkook to treat them just as poorly and embarrass their family name.

He lures them in with those dreamy eyes, and once he’s bent them over a few times, he sends them on their way. They’re ruined, and soon after—divorced and lonely. All that is left for them to do is send their lover boy gifts and hope he reconsiders denying their love.

But Jungkook’s heart is stone-cold. He doesn’t give a fuck about your feelings, darling.

…..

“Fuck! You feel so good, Jungkook.”

Ever since Jungkook threw you down here, the only thing you’ve been able to see through your blurred vision are the raging flames from the fire. Your watery eyes create a thick film that alters your vision. The rasp in your voice sounds like you’ve been screaming for hours, and it feels like you have. You knew he’d push limits, but you’ve endured a lot more than you bargained for tonight.

You’ve been spanked and branded until your ass turned sore and red. Your cunt has been teased until you cried, and your body has been bent in every possible way. You’ve lost track of time; there’s no telling how long you’ve had your face buried in this rug, your back arched, and your ass in the air.

The straps on the spreader bar dig into your skin, but you haven’t even noticed. You’re too busy trying to remember your own name, and keep your sanity.

“Whore, did I ask you to speak?”

Jungkook spits venom each time he speaks. You’d be lying if you said his harshness didn’t make your cunt drip. The very first time he addressed you as whore you were a mess.

“No, but—”

He smacks your ass before you can finish, bringing a fresh wave of tears to your eyes, and arousal to your core.

“Well, shut the fuck up,” he growls in your ear. “…Or I gag you.”

You don’t take his threat lightly. If Jungkook takes away your ability to scream his name, you’ll probably lose your mind. You already can’t move an inch while being restrained in this position. You let out a sob every time his cock enters your guts.

You can understand why one would take being treated like trash; Jungkook is addicting. You can’t get enough, and even though he has a heart of ice, you know he’s loving the way you feel too.

“I told you I’d wipe that smirk right off your face, didn’t I?” he grunts.

You’re trying to hear what he’s saying, but it’s hard to do when you’re this drunk off of cock.

When the force of his thrusts sends you flying forward, his hands are already in the position to pull you back on his dick. You have zero control of your body in this position. You’re only a couple of holes for him to fuck. And for whatever stupid reason, that makes you proud.

“Answer me, bitch!”

He slaps your ass to grab your attention. The sting ripples and spreads all over your skin. Your arousal leaks uncontrollably, ruining the surface beneath you.

“Jungkook, please!”

He scoffs and continues to fuck you like he’s got somewhere to be after this.

“Please, what?” he asks. “Use some fucking words. If you know how.”

“I can’t hold it anymore, Jungkook,” you press.

He leans over your body and places his head on top of yours while he continues to wreck you from behind.

“You’re pathetic.”

“I know,” you whisper. “I’m sorry.”

He frees you from your restraints and flips you over. His eyes are dark and filled with desire. You know he’s about to give you everything he has, and you are more than thankful to accept.

“Keep your eyes on me, and I’ll think about it,” he mutters.

Jungkook opens your legs, creating space for himself. You try to pull him closer, but he quickly pins your hands above your head. “And don’t fucking touch me either.”

He enters your pussy before you can apologize. It wouldn’t have been sincere anyway. You’re desperate; you’ll say anything right now.

“Fuck!” you gasp.

Jungkook’s cock isn’t just thick. It fills you and still has inches to spare.

“This is the only thing sluts like you are good for… Lying on your back and taking cock.”

You spread your legs wider as if he can go any deeper.

“Use me, then.”

It’s more of a plea than a request, but Jungkook complies, nevertheless. Your legs wrap around him when his movements quicken.

Jungkook’s grunts and moans let you know he’s as close to his release as you are.

Your needy voice calling out his name only motivates him to fuck you harder. Your pussy quivers for more and more, and he continues to feed you until you’re satisfied. You’re suddenly overwhelmed with pleasure and Jungkook senses your orgasm rolling in before you can even warn him.

“Come,” he commands.

You want to squeeze your eyes shut, but you remember his instructions and resist the urge.

“That’s it. Come all over my dick.”

Your mouth opens to scream, but nothing comes out. Your nails dig into your palm as you try to cope with the intensity of the pleasure. The high seems to last for several minutes before you finally come down.

Jungkook waits until you’ve relaxed before he pulls out and jerks his cock until he paints your pussy with his cum, and you prop yourself up on your elbows to watch him smear it all over your abdomen and thighs.

He’s the first to speak after he’s cleaned you up with his shirt.

“You did good, baby. That was hot.”

“Yeah… It was.”

“We should do it again, you know? I don’t know anyone who can take that much.”

Jungkook helps you up. You have to grab onto his biceps to steady your wobbly legs. He finds humor in your stance; it’s the first time you’ve seen him smile. He should do it more often.

“You should know how this goes, Jungkook,” you remind him.

The blacksmith nods, coming to terms with the fact that he’s the one who’s been wrecked this time. You offer him a smile, the best you’re capable of, and prepare to leave.

“Well, goodnight. Enjoy your cookies; they smell delicious.”

Your eyes gesture toward the freshly baked dozen you brought from Seokjin’s bakery. He’ll receive at least twenty more of them tomorrow morning.

Before you can walk away, a persistent Jungkook grabs your waist and tries to convince you to reconsider.

“Stay?” he suggests. “Have one with me?”

His eyes are so hopeful, so afraid of rejection for the first time since he was a kid. The tables have turned once again, and he hates being on this side.

You can hear how fast his heart is beating and sense how he’s hanging on by a thin thread. It’d be hard for anyone to turn him down with the kind of expression he’s presenting to you. But unfortunately for him, you aren’t just anyone.

“Now why would I ever do something like that, Jungkook?”

You slip by him and make your way to the front door. The last thing he hears is cackling as you disappear into the night. The sound will forever give Jungkook chills.

He isn’t sure what you’ve done to him, but he doesn’t like the feeling. He wanted to yell at you, but he also wanted to beg you to stay. However, he didn’t do either of those things. Nothing came out.

…Because you left him empty.

“And they say I’m the mean one,” Jungkook thinks to himself.

#jungkook x reader #jungkook smut #bts x reader #bts smut #bts fanfics #jungkook fanfics #btsdreamcourt #bangtanbathhouse #bangtansorciere #kvanity #bts imagines #jungkook imagines #fic: unholy night #sugakookitty

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queenie-official · 6 months

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Chapter Seven: ‘Something New’ Bridgerton Au!Anakin

Part 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6

a/n: i’m back 🤭 this is a lot of fluff y’all so i hope you eat it up 💪💪 it’s bit long because i sort of combined chapter 7 and chapter 8 since it made more sense for it to be in this one compared to what i have planned out. anyways that’s all i’ve got say love you all 💋💋

seven days, that’s how long you had with Anakin before the responsibilities of the world would catch up with you two. seven days then your honeymoon would be over. thankfully even though the first day was a little bit of a rough start it was what you needed to begin truly getting to know each other. and that’s exactly what you’d been doing, over the last four days you’d learned a lot about him- like his favorite color was light blue. and he wasn’t the youngest but in fact had a little sister making him the middle child, which honestly explained a lot.

you were currently taking a stroll with him in the royal garden, conversing and listening to him explain his family dynamic a bit more thoroughly. Anakin had told you how he’d purposely mess with his older brother to keep him on his toes since in his words ‘he’d be to stuck up and a complete stick in the mud’ if he wasn’t there. which prompted you to then ask what would he be now since he was here.

“that’s what my little sister is for, she looks up to me. practically a mini me but smarter” you snort a laugh at that and he smiles brighter. he truly had a pretty smile. “you sound like you adore her” you say with a soft smile and he chuckles “i do but never tell her i said that.” you quirk a brow “why not?” you ask curiously. “because she’d never let me live it down” he states a bit dramatically but completely serious and you can’t help the smile that never leaves your face only growing with each interaction.

“so Obi-Wan can never escape you then” you voice the thought out loud and Anakin laughs, everything about him you’ve been finding incredibly charming. “oh yea he’s never going to have it easy- Ahsoka is like my apprentice of mischief. star pupil” he said with a mischievous smile leaning in towards you as he speaks making you blush slightly. “only pupil” you point out and he rolls his eyes “for now.” your brows knit together in confusion “what’s that supposed to mean?”

“time will tell” he says with a shrug, you scoff and think about pressing more but decide to drop it. you’re both quiet for a moment, silently enjoying one another’s company as you continue the walk in the garden. the warm sun and floral smell from all the flowers creating the perfect bubble. it was your idea, coming on this walk- in fact you insisted he’d join you so you could show him your favorite spot. he seemed reluctant at first but you quickly realized that was just him messing with you and not how he truly felt. you felt your mind wonder back to his sister “it sounds like she cares about you as much as you do her, so how come she wasn’t at the wedding?”

“my mother was afraid she’d cause a scene- which to be fair i wouldn’t put it past her, she can be a bit….snippy and she’s not afraid to speak her mind it was just not the right time or place for that.” you let his answer hang in the air for a bit, in all honesty she sounded like a good person. a free spirit for sure but still a good person “she sounds like she’d make a good leader” you offer as a response. “i suppose” he says with a wrinkled nose, clearly not agreeing with the thought. “i personally can’t see her as much more than a bratty teen.”

“i’m sure that’s how Obi-Wan feels about you” you counter and he can’t help but laugh “well then i guess i got a taste of my own medicine” you giggle at the thought and begin to lead Anakin across the bridge. you where close to the spot you wanted to show him now, just a bit more of a walk but Anakin had stopped. when you turned to see why his footsteps ceased you where met with him looking over the bridge out across the water admiring the view of the fish swimming up the stream and the way the sun reflected across it. you take a moment to admire him first before walking back over and standing beside him to look over the stream yourself.

“i wish i could meet her, i feel like id love her” it came out soft, almost like you hadn’t fully meant to say it out loud. you could feel his eyes on you now, and then a sudden warmth on your back. his hand was pressed against the small of it, you had to fight back the way your cheeks burned at the action. “if she warmed up to you i think she’d like you as well” he says and you finally force yourself to meet his gaze. “as of right now i’m guessing she’s not to keen on me” you ask with a tilt to your head and he bites back a smile. “very much so” not surprising you did technically take away her brother.

“she’s the main reason i agreed” you blink a few times trying to process what he meant. “huh?” he pulled his hand from you and you had to fight a frown at the loss of contact as you watched him lean an elbow on the bridge railing “well i wasn’t really given a choice- but the reason i was so compliant in the matter, and i know this is selfish. was for her not my kingdom.” you mimic his actions leaning onto the bridge railing yourself as you listened to him speak carefully.

“the kingdom of Tatooine is falling, already on its last leg. i knew if i went along and everything went well then we would get the support we need from Alderaan, which would mean my sister would not have to bare witness to what would happen if we hadn’t gotten the proposal and that was the only reason i was remotely okay with everything.” you felt your heart tug at the confession, that familiar feeling of guilt resurfacing. “you’re a good brother Anakin” he smiled at the sentiment. a small silence filled the air before he spoke again.

“could you tell Obi-Wan that, he seems insistent on the fact i’m nothing but a bad influence” clearly the conversation had gotten a bit to emotional for his liking judging by how quick he was to play it off. you smile at that and pull off from the railing “well i never said you weren’t a bad influence.” you retort as you begin to walk off the bridge and continue the original intention of this walk. “ouch, you wound me” he places his hand over his heart in mock offense “honestly me a bad influence? doesn’t even begin to sound true.” he was smiling as he said it unable to take himself seriously with that statement and you can’t help but laugh “you are full of yourself.” he shrugs “i think i have every right to be” he says smugly and you can’t help but roll your eyes.

“so what does Tatooine need most?” you ask, promptly changing the question as you both round a corner, now in a much smaller section of the garden. the flowers where much more overgrown here the only clear pathway was leading to the center of some pillars. you turn to him with a smile, this was what you wanted to show him. it was your favorite place to hide when you where younger and upset. you’d stumbled across it on accident but it quickly became your favorite place.

he raised a brow but smiled regardless, taking the time to look around before following you up the path. the center of the pillars was clear just a bunch of grass. you plopped down on the ground opting to lay rather then sit after all your dress wasn’t exactly the sitting kind. he stood over you for a moment looking down and contemplating something, you weren’t sure what but you decided to just brush it off once he followed suit and laid down beside you. “what do you mean” he finally asks in response to your question. “i know our coronation isn’t for another few days but we could begin preparations now, and then once we are officially crowned we can take immediate action. so what in your opinion does Tatooine need most?” you explain, turning your head to the side to face him. tracing over his jaw with your eyes and trying to memorize each detail of his face from this angle as he thinks. it was strange how quickly you found yourself falling for him, but he made it easy and you honestly weren’t mad about it.

“the route of our problems is lack of funds. we have a high crime rate, not for lack of laws but lack of ways to in-force them.” he begins and you move your gaze back upwards, staring out at the passing clouds. “go on” this time he turned to look at you “the only jail we have is the palace dungeons, outside of that there’s nothing. and there chalk full already. we’ve thought of building more but all of the money rightfully goes towards feeding the people” he continues and you nod, turning back so you both where facing each other now. “so funds and military support would be most welcome?” you ask carefully wanting to make sure you got what he was implying.

“yes, of course food and supplies would also be a good help but with money they’d be able to buy their own” you hum a brief response before giving him an affirming nod “understood, then we have our priorities” he raises a brow, a small half smile appearing on his face “just like that?” you smile back “well we are to be king and queen, our word is law.” not entirely true, you both did have your own set of rules and regulations to follow. but overall you two where at the top, the people look to you not parliament. “i guess being a king isn’t as bad as i thought” he joked.

a comfortable silence fell once more, only this time you where staring at each other when it happened. you hadn’t realized just how close he’d laid next to you until now, his entire body pressed against your side. faces only inches apart, if you moved any closer you’d kiss. the thought made your stomach erupt with butterflies, it wouldn’t be your first kiss since technically that happened on your wedding day. however it was different then than now. now it was you wanting to kiss him and not a requirement, you felt uneasy. not use to this type of thing, you force yourself to break the eye contact looking back up to the sky before starting a conversation for a distraction.

“tell me more about Tatooine- the good parts what’s it like there?” you ask him and he laughs.“Tatooine has very few good things in my opinion- for starters we’re a desert kingdom, which means there’s sand for days.” he says annoyed and you turn your attention back to him with a raised brow “not a fan of sand?” you ask and bite back a laugh. “i hate it. it’s course and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere.” you couldn’t hold the laughter in anymore especially with how serious he meant it, brows furrowed like he was cursing the sand in his mind. “well remind me to never take you to a beach” you say in between giggles, it was his turn to roll his eyes at you as you kept laughing. “there is one thing that i love about Tatooine- aside from my family” his sentence pulls you back and you force yourself to calm down. “what’s that?” he relaxes more once you ask and smiles as he speaks “the races.”

“races?” he nods and begins to explain “we have horse races, i was a rider- against my mother and fathers wishes but they never exactly stopped me either. it’s not like i took place in the gambling side of things, i just like the adrenaline of it.” you watched as he spoke with the enthusiasm of a small child. it was cute and his eyes sparkled “have you ever won?” you wonder out loud. “oh yea just about every time i’ve raced, ill miss it” he says rather solemnly and that made your heart ache.

“what if we introduced the races to Alderaan? it seems like a harmless enough tradition” you spoke before really thinking and he snapped straight up like you’d just told him the best news in the world before he quickly shut himself down not sure if you where being serious. “honestly?” he presses needing confirmation before he allowed himself to be to excited. “why not, it could be fun a way to unite our kingdoms- people from Tatooine can come here to compete and vice versa.”

he’d kissed you then. it was gentle but passionate, a smile on his face the whole time. it made your head spin, face burn but you liked that and when he pulled away you did your best to act unaffected not quite ready to express yourself.

The next two days with Anakin where just as sweet, you both where getting along great. opening up about any thought that came to mind. it was wonderful and then something changed.

you weren’t sure what caused it but he was acting different today. more shut off and distant, it hurt. this was the last day of your honeymoon and somehow you’d messed it up without even realizing. all day he’d been brushing you off and keeping as much physical distance as possible, your head was spinning trying to find where you’d gone wrong. each conversation you’ve had with him running on repeat looking for even the smallest inkling that you’d crossed a boundary of sorts but you kept coming up empty. you tried asking him what was wrong as well wanting to just rip off the bandaid but he simply said nothing was wrong.

talk about emotional whiplash, if nothing was wrong why was he acting this way. why would he not even let you get near him. you’d let him be alone for about an hour before you couldn’t take the pit of anxiety anymore and decided to face him once more. This time you weren’t going to stop asking him until you got an answer, so you made quick work to hunt him down. which was surprisingly easy compared to the last time he’d disappeared. you found him struggling to walk up the stairs, you where quick to rush up to him not even giving him a chance to process it was you who now stood beside him. “Anakin what happened?” you ask concerned reaching out to help him but he moves away from your touch. “i’m fine” he says curtly and you’re taken aback briefly but recover “are you confident in that fact because-“

“i said i’m fine!” he shouts and you go silent letting your arms fall to your side as you begin to pull back, feeling yourself mentally shutting down. you see a look of regret on his face when he finally looks at you, as well as a sheen of sweat on his forehead. actually now that you got a better look at him he was pale, sickly so. he took a deep bated breath before proceeding up the stairs.

“i mean it i’m fine.” you scoff at him before following behind, he was heading in the direction of his room and you where going to make sure he got there safely. “could you just leave me be” you roll your eyes and cross your arms “i’m not going anywhere Anakin so would you just let me help yo-” you watch as he began to fall backwards, in a panic you do your best to catch him only to realize just how heavy he was the second his weight hit your arms and you fall down with him.

he was out cold, you on the other hand where now stuck underneath him. at least you’d broken his fall.

you wring out a wet cloth before placing it on his head that rested in your lap. you had gotten the attention of your guards and made them carry him to his room as you got a hold of the royal physician. that was two hours ago, now he was resting much more peacefully after he’d been woken up to take some medicine to help fight a fever. The Flu was what the physician said it was, and he’d insisted you not be in the room with Anakin in fear you might get it as well. as if that would stop you, he was sick and you wanted- needed to make sure he was okay. if you got sick in the process then oh well.

you watch over him carefully, running your fingers through his damp sweaty curls. what irked you about all of this was that he said nothing, suffered in silence instead of asking for your help. you thought you guys where finally getting somewhere. finally trusting one another- liking one another, learning to love one another and then he does this. ignores you, pushes you away when he needs you most. you see his eyes twitch and your mind goes blank, waiting patiently to see if he’d finally fully wake up. at least enough to have a conscious conversation.

soon enough his eyes do flutter open, looking around himself briefly to process his surrondings before looking at you. “you said you where fine” was the first thing out of your mouth a frown gracing your features and he had the audacity to smirk. “i was” he huffed, and you had to fight the urge to flick his head. “i’d believe you if you hadn’t passed out right after you said it” he remained silent after that statement and so did you. upset with his actions and not wanting to make a scene while he was sick you figured it best to just quit speaking entirely.

“why are you doing this” you raise a brow and he sighs knowing what you where going to ask “caring for me i mean” you feel your nose scrunch up, what a stupid question in your opinion. “I am your wife, it is my job” he closed his eyes at that “i didn’t think that applied to us” he said simply. “what?” your brows knit together “the duties of a married couple” he adds. it triggered you a bit, why would he think you wouldn’t want to help him. “you’re sick, was i just supposed to stand to the side and watch you suffer?” he opens his eyes and shrugs. “the vows i said may have been empty when i made them but i still made them nonetheless and i for one keep my promises.”

“so you’re only doing this out of obligation?” he asks and you frown “no-” he shifts slightly so that his head is more propped up on your thigh, closing his eyes and letting out a soft groan like it physically pained him to move. “then why? because you like me?” he smiles as he asks- unbelievable he could not possibly have the energy to be teasing you right now. “i’m doing this as your wife and nothing more” you say but it’s clear you aren’t being entirely truthful with that statement and you can tell by the look he gives you he’s not buying it.

“i think you just don’t want to confess you like me” he chuckles but quickly regrets it, closing his eyes again in pain. “if i did i would tell you” you say and begin to run your fingers through his hair again and watch as he relaxes. “well make sure you shout it” he mumbles. “i’m sorry?” he opens his eyes again, scanning over your face before answering “when you tell me you like me, shout it so i can hear you and know you mean it.”

“you’re delusional” you huff but can’t hide your smile and he’s quick to mirror you. “that’s probably the fever” he says with a shrug before allowing himself to doze back off to sleep in your lap.

part 8

Tag List: @luvvfromme @gatekeepingirlboss @bimbo-baggins86 @iluvanakinskywalker @bby-imasociopath @curlycarley @burnthecheshirewitch @misscaller06

AHHH OKAY HERES CHAPTER SEVEN LOVES💋💋 side note i could not resist the urge to include Anakin’s hatred for sand- it was too good of an opportunity 😭 not to mention idk about you guys but i am completely with him on that ☝️as someone with sensory issues sand is one of my worst nightmares💀 anyway i hope you huns enjoyed Xx<3

#hayden christensen #anakin skywalker #anakin skywalker x reader #anakin x reader #anakin imagine #atoc anakin #star wars anakin #rots anakin #anakin fanfiction #anakin skywalker fanfiction #anakin skywalker x reader fluff #anakin x reader fluff #anakin x you #bridgerton au!anakin x reader #bridgerton au!anakin #bridgerton au #bridgerton #queenie’s thoughts xx<3

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munson-mayhem · 1 year

Text

For a reason I don’t understand y’all seem to like my writing or at least the story but as long as you guys want to read I’ll write stuff ! And thank you for all the support !!! I still don’t know how to link things or add pics or anything but I’ll figure it out at some point

Part 2

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Ever since the day I kicked Ao’nung in the face life hasn’t been as horrible and empty I’ve even become closer with Ao’nung and Rotxo. Things will never be as they once were but I think Neteyam would tell me to stop being a skxawng, to stop waisting my life. All life is a gift from Eywa and should be treaded as such, every year every day every hour every minute every second is a gift so I should do something with it. At least that’s what Lo’ak in all his infinite wisdom said to me one night as I sat alone on the far side of the island. Watching him March up to me that night and tell me this isn’t what Neteyam would want for me I couldn’t help but smile and tell him in that moment I saw his brother in him and that Neteyam would be very proud of the man he was becoming. We both cried that night sitting together and talking, it’s the night I admitted to Lo’ak that I feel I’m close to losing myself and I promised I would try to live not only to honor the memory of Neteyam but for my family for the sully’s. It took some time but after a few weeks I find myself sometimes spending the day with Ao’nung and Rotxo and some of their friends or I even spend time with Tsireya and Kiri, I’ve even been asked to join the Tsahik lessons they receive when Kiri spilled the beans that I had been unofficially training with Mo’at before we left the Omatikaya clan. The current Tsahik Ronal will train Ao’nungs future mate when the time comes but until then she wants us to learn what we can that way when she has her baby there will be a few of us that can help around the village with simple things. When I wasn’t with them I spend days with Jake, Lo’ak and spider we run missions and ever now and again we go to the forest to meet up with Norm and the clan to plan battle strategy, other days I spend with Neytiri and Tuk going around the village helping with any stray task or even helping Tuk with lessons. Ao’nung has been helping me learn to use a spear how to dive better how to learn the way of the water,at one point I thought about asking Tsireya but I know she spends her spare time with Lo’ak and I’d never take that time together away from them but I also wasn’t comfortable asking someone I didn’t know so I asked Ao’nung. Who better to teach me the ways of the clan more than the future Olo’eyktan himself even if he is a skxawng sometimes. Once a week Ao’nung, Tsireya, Lo’ak and I would go for training with Lo’ak’s spirit brother payakan seeing as we are the first 4 that will be preforming our Iknmaya, the three of them only have to bond with a Tsurak. I however still need to bond with a Tulkun preform all the tasks and then bond with a Tsurak too. It was during one of our days like this that all of our lives changed.

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The way the light catches on the water is mesmerizing the flickers of animals shadows as they swim by distracting me slightly but the biggest shadow is that of the Tulkun that swims above Ao’nung and I, we can see the small silhouettes that belong to our respective siblings as they swim with payakan holding his fin. I must have been distracted for to long because Ao’nung flicks a shell at me and begins signing that I need to focus on my task, I nod and begin swimming just above the sea floor far deeper than I’d been able to just a few months prior. My goal to stay under water as long as I could, my ability to hold my breath under water has been getting much better. I’ve taken to reciting the mantra of the Metkayina in my head but as I’ve gotten better at holding my breath I’ve taken to learning how to sign it, Ao’nung sits in front of me in the sand under the waves. Looking at Ao’nung I begin to sign

“The way of water has no beginning and no end.The sea is around you and in you.” The first two lines were easy enough they were all motions I’ve seen before or even used myself. “The sea is your home, before your birth and after your death. Our hearts beat in the” I’m able to sign but the next word womb I pause I’d never seen anyone sign that before so I look up to Ao’ nung and motion the word “help.” He nods at me and smiles positioning his hand about three inches below his navel where a woman’s womb would be and made a circle motion. When I try to copy the motion I must do it wrong because he makes a sound of disapproval and gets up to swim towards me. I’m sitting cross legged on the ground as he swims behind me and while he’s still in my view he motions for me to kneel. Once he’s directly behind me he kneels his chest presses into my back as he leans forward to wrap his hand over mine, once he has it he flattens my hand over my womb his pressed firmly into mine and moves my hand in a clockwise motion. It takes a few moments but when he releases my hand he doesn’t back away instead I see him reach both arms around me and motion for me to “try again.”

Taking care to slow my heart I try signing the entire line again “Our hearts beat in the womb of the world.” I successfully Finnish the line. When I’m done I spin around quickly and throw my arms around Ao’nungs neck making him let out a startled noise and a few bubbles. You can’t really fall when you’re under water but with the weight I threw into this hug we hit the sea floor. There’s sand everywhere, as we try and twist and get away it just kicks up more I can’t see anything can’t tell which way is up or down. What I do feel seconds later are large hands grabbing my one on my waist the other on my neck then I’m pulled into a chest. When I try to move Ao’nung holds me tighter to his chest so I stop. It’s been a minute or two according to the count in my head but my neck if starting to hurt from holding it at an odd angle for so long so I decide to lay my head on his chest. Once I do I feel him relax a little and thread his fingers into my hair. It takes a few more minutes for the sand to finally settle but when it does I look up to Ao’nung and smile then place my head back where it was for just a few moments longer.

The way of water has no beginning and no end. The sea is around you and in you. The sea is your home, before your birth and after your death. Our hearts beat in the womb of the world. Our breath burns in the shadows of the deep. The sea gives and the sea takes. Water connects all things. Life to death. Darkness to light.

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It’s been a few days since the under water sand storm incident and I’ve been avoiding Ao’nung because of it, not entire sure now to deal with the fact that I’m pretty sure I have feelings for the young man. I find myself on the same deserted part of the island I practically lived at for the first few months after I lost my first love.About 6 months had passed since we lost Neteyam and I know he would want me to live and be happy but I still feel like I’m betraying him by caring for Ao’nung.

“Sis” I hear a voice I’d know anywhere say. When I whip around and see all of my surrogate siblings Lo’ak leading the party.

When the entire group reaches me they all take a seat Lo’ak right across from me Kiri and Spider on either side of us and Tuk sits right in my lap giving me a hug as she does.

“How we can help?” Kiri asks giving me a soft smile while taking my hand. Squeezing her hand I smile back and sigh I take a look at each person here starting with Kiri then Lo’ak, Spider and finally Tuk, she smiles and nods for me to tell them.

“Would you hate me if I cared for Ao’nung” i finally mutter after several minutes

The three older kids look like they’re all about to start saying things at once and i wince but little Tuk beats them to it

“Y/N we could never hate you, not for anything your just as much a sully as we are and sully’s stick together you grew up along side each of us you are our sister with or without having mated with Neteyam.” She pauses to take a deep breath and sees I’m about to say something” I’m not done!” She giggles. “Neteyam would want you to be happy like he would for all of us, We want you to be happy too so do mom and dad.” Before I can say anything Kiri speaks next.

“ it’s not like your forgetting him or disrespecting his memory by loving someone else. Wouldn’t you want him to move on at some point and be happy too if it had been you that we lost.” I nod as Lo’ak starts speaking

“I said my peace a few months ago but what I will say is let us be here for you ok you skxawng.” I laugh out as I cry quietly we all look to spider but he’s quiet for a moment or two.

“ I’m not the same species but I am one of you and that’s because you always treated me like the sully kids, you taught me the same things you taught them, helped me with anything I needed just like you would them, you even stood up for me at times when others didn’t, you were the one that tried to fight my dads unit to get me back in the forest that night.” He pauses “ you have always been and will always be my big sister and you deserve all the happiness in this world.” He finishes speaking and looks up at me. They all look at me and I’m not entirely sure what to say. It takes a few minutes for me to stop crying but once I do I get a genius idea. Without waiting I launch from my spot on the ground onto Lo’ak and lay across his stomach and yell “ DOG PILE !” the other three scramble up to join in all of us laughing and making comments so loud that we don’t hear Jake and Neytiri walk up with with Ronal, Tonowari, Ao’nung, Tsireya, and Rotxo. Everyone but the Sully parents look at us like we’re crazy. When Ao’nung and Tsireya look at each other they smile and acknowledge the love they both share for a sully sibling. When we all finally untangle from the dog pile still laughing we start to help each other up and wave at the group looking at us. We end up making a bonfire on the beach and sitting there as one big group laughing and taking together and sharing fun stories for what seems like hours. After awhile I find myself next to Ao’nung and after slightly longer I rest my head on his strong shoulder he brings one hand to my hair and plays with it everything is amazing until we hear someone scream

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pikahlua · 2 years

Text

Hacking Katsuki Bakugou’s Last Remaining Brain Cell: I’ve only had this chapter for like three waking hours but if anyone even looks at my son the wrong way I will use my fucking toes to drag them out by their hair

I haven’t had my caffeine yet and it’s about to show, but thAT AIN’T STOPPING ME FROM READING KATSUKI’S MIND

Okay I have a lot of feelings and predictions formulating about this chapter and I wanna give most of them more time to stew (and more time to, like, get a good night’s sleep), but y’all are underestimating my genius perfect son and I will not stand for this slander

Here’s chapter 360, I’m not even gonna copy the translations over here for each page, I’m just gonna sometimes assume you have it memorized or can read Japanese for the purposes of this post look I warned you I am sleep-deprived as fuck already and you should know what my sleep-deprived posts can be like

First of all, let me just say, I was right...

AFO was definitely trying to psych Katsuki out of his fucking mind. All his taunting this chapter was in the service of breaking Katsuki’s spirit;

I was right, this is the fucking question of the goddamn day;

and I’ve got you the answer to this question now.

Everything in this opening scene is a callback to the final exam arc I’ll have you know. I woke up realizing that “uru-” Katsuki gets out is actually him probably trying to say “shut up!” just like he did when he was under All Might’s boot.

As I was falling asleep last night, it occurred to me that this moment is just meant to be a visual representation of Katsuki experiencing a “hallucination of death” in the face of the Symbol of Fear. Nothing in this scene happens in reality.

(I shall hereby refer to this scan as Page 3.)

HOWEVER

HOW.

FUCKING.

EVER.

THIS IS THE PAGE THAT’S CAUGHT MY EYE.

{And this all-important page is now named Page 4.)

I know it looks like Katsuki is having a heart attack on the spot, that he’s being humbled and crushed like a bug as Tomura rubs his face in all his worst fears, that his facial expression is one of abject horror and humiliation.

But you’re wrong.

It turns out these two pages in conjunction are MASSIVELY IMPORTANT HOOOOOOMGGGGHHHGHHHH

THIS. THIS FUCKING THING WAS DRIVING ME NUTS FROM THE MOMENT I SAW THIS PAGE.

That’s artistic shorthand for a realization.

What the fuck did he realize? Seems fucking important since that’s the last clear picture of his face we get before the final page of the chapter!

And yeah, I see some of you have already identified that in the page before, Katsuki is exhibiting some DISTINCTLY Izuku-like behavior: mumbling battle analysis.

But did you pay attention to the content of that analysis?

Right

Fingers

Feint

Sound familiar?

...

If you said Deku vs Kacchan (any part), you’re wrong.

(Here’s the part where I show you how fucking wild my sleep-deprived brain is.)

Page 3 and Page 4. These motherfucking pages.

Page 4 has one line--said by Tomura: “No matter how far you go, you’re OFA’s (read as: Izuku Midoriya’s) goldfish excrement.”

And while now I know that’s an idiom, at the time all I could think about was

these fish fuckers.

And I looked up this panel in Japanese to see if he says anything about fish crap, but no, he says “That’s not bait/a lure” or whatever.

But the word he used, for no good reason, reminded me of...

Kamino.

And that’s when I realized.

Page 3, AFO says, “You admired All Might [in the moment] just when he wins, right? Let’s see the reality, Katsuki Bakugou.”

Katsuki already has seen the reality.

Katsuki’s spark of realization this chapter was in response to AFO’s remark about the reality of All Might’s moments of victory. That’s what gives him the realization that snaps him out of his hallucination of death.

Katsuki’s doing the same thing All Might did. He’s learning from Izuku.

That’s why he’s dropping into battle analysis mode.

Katsuki is in a debilitated state just like All Might was. He’s facing the same degradation AFO used against All Might then.

The final word of large text, “mada,” on chapter 360′s final page is the same as this one here

except this page adds “shinen no da!!!!” which means “can’t die.”

“I can’t die yet.”

And we all know death = losing.

Katsuki is focused on the reality of what victory looked like for All Might in Kamino, the same event that he harbors massive internalized guilt over. He’s working through his guilt. He’s accepting All Might won despite what Katsuki feels he made All Might turn into. He’s turning that moment into his power.

“Right...fingers...feint.”

All Might used his broken right arm as a decoy to hit All For One with his left arm. Then he switched back to his right arm and “put his back into” the finishing blow.

Katsuki’s right arm is broken right now.

It’s his turn.

#mha 360 #bnha 360 #my hero academia manga spoilers #all might #katsuki bakugou #the key was goldfish crap #and yes #he's in danger #but god will it be glorious #character analysis #meta #sleep-deprived ramblings #but i'm right

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embersflame · 8 months

Text

Part 2

It’s been a month after you first started working with the 118 and you couldn’t have been happier you’ve bonded so much with the team you basically found a second family also you got a small apartment not you best place to call home but it would do as long as you didn’t move back in with your parents in south California where they retired you want a place for yourself without parents or a jerk of an ex you want to have fun and enjoy life after all the calls you’ve been on have been draining both mentally and physically you were looking forward to going out to karaoke with the team tonight until you got a call from Eddie that said he wasn’t going to make it his son Christopher wasn’t feeling well and Eddie decided to bail out in order to stay home with him since you’ve gotten so well with Eddie both bonding being Hispanic you enjoyed talking Spanish with him which drove Buck crazy but you would gang up on him and buck didn’t enjoy both his friends having inside jokes he didn’t even begin to understand but the teasing went both ways you and buck having matching golden retriever energy and extreme recklessness Eddie just had to kept both of you in line joking they you two together was like a tornado you’ll never seen it coming and left destruction you decided on bailing too and headed to Eddie’s with some homemade soup in hopes of lifting their spirits as Eddie would get anxious about Chris’s well being just as you were about to knock someone hugged you from behind you jumped up frightened only to hear the familiar laugh of a Buckley “you almost made me drop my soup you asshole” you swatted him while he continued to laugh “I’m sorry but it was a perfect opportunity I just couldn’t resist” you scoffed while knowing you would have done the same “guess we both had the same idea to come over to a help out” “ yeah when Chris is feeling icky it not usually not a fun time for Eddie thought I’d come by a lighten the load” you both knock until I tried Eddie appeared at the door a sign of relief escapees his lip as he let y’all in you look around and see Chris at the couch slumped over watching cartoons food in the coffee table untouched “thank goodness you guys came im so tired he don’t want anything to eat and I’m worried” “I brought some soup that might make him feel better” you reply somehow buck manages to convince Chris to eat the soup if all of us join him and soon after he’s tired and eddie goes to put him to bed we all sit on the couch drinking beers and chatting until we fall asleep eventually taking turn to check on Chris through the night to make sure he keeps his food down and doesn’t run a fever next morning you are Laying on the floor hugging pillow while buck hogs the couch and Eddie has since gone to bed you wake up confused as hell and with a hangover you sit up and start poking buck in the face “buck buck wake up” he stirred but kept on snoring you decided to make breakfast hopefully Eddie doesn’t mind your snooping around trying to figure out what to cook you settled on some pancakes when Eddie strolls in wearing just gray sweats clearly hungover too and with bed head you couldn’t help but stare hoping he’s too tired to notice your blushing buck now smelling the wonderful breakfast comes to and makes his way to your side leaning over and trying to steal a pancake from the pan you smile and elbow him “don’t buck why don’t you set the table instead” he pouts but follows orders soon Chris wakes up and joins feeling better he happily devours his food

#evan buck buckely #eddie diaz x reader #eddie diaz #9 1 1 #buck x reader

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illwynd · 1 year

Note

Not to be overly intrusive but I very much want to hear your rant about jms lady loki arc? Your thoughts about thor stuff are fascinating generally, and it either makes me go " I hadn't even considered this aspect of things ", or " oh that's what bothered me about this but I just couldn't find the words!" I mean it goes without saying that you don't have to if you don't want to, but I haven't heard people say anything about that arc other than it was sexist, so now I'm very curious about your opinions on it.

Oh nonny you’re not overly intrusive at all! Thank you for asking this and giving me the excuse to blather about it XD and thank you for the kind words. I clearly think about this stuff way too much, and all I can hope for is that someone else finds it of some sort of interest or value.

Re the JMS lady Loki arc…

So OK I guess I should summarize the thing for the benefit of anyone who hasn’t read it. The main gist goes like this: Thor is having to call Asgardian souls back into the world after breaking the cycle of Ragnarok, and when Loki is brought back, he is “inexplicably” in a female body. Loki has in fact arranged this as part of a con, using his new appearance to better sell everyone on the idea that he’s changed and no longer villainous, but the truth is that it’s Sif’s body he’s stolen, and Sif’s spirit is trapped in the body of a dying mortal, so it’s basically attempted murder (though Loki’s plan is thwarted and Sif is saved at the last minute). In the meantime, the “lady” Loki is a sexy, buxom caricature of played-up femininity, using her wiles to manipulate the men around her, and through it all it doesn’t really seem to be motivated by any genuine gender fluidity on Loki’s part. It’s just a trick.

So I can see where the criticism comes from: that it’s sexist, that it’s bad genderfluid representation since it’s in the form of a murderous villain, that it resembles transphobic tropes of trans women being “really” men trying to steal whatever from women. But those criticisms never seemed to me to land quite right. They seemed to be superficial and missing something important. And there are several angles you can take in looking at it more deeply where all those criticisms just fall apart.

I’m not even really going to go into the problems with decrying it as bad representation because he’s a villain. I really hope we’re past that. It’s not good when your media queers can only be villains, but having every queer character be morally upright and squeaky clean isn’t a good answer either, because real people aren’t like that. What I ask for is that the whole range be available, and that for any given character, they are first and foremost an interesting character with believable motivations for what they do. So “but he’s so evil he was trying to kill Sif! Bad representation! Bad!” is a complaint we’re just going to set aside and make dubious faces at, because for reasons I’ll get to later, I think there is an emotional truth to the portrayal, and in fiction that matters far more than any black-and-white moral claims.

So next up, we have the complaint that he doesn’t seem to be motivated by any genuine genderfluid feelings, since it’s all just a con. And my issue with that is that… it’s a very superficial take. He is motivated by gender stuff. Just not in a way that the complainers recognize.

The absolutely crucial detail is that his target is Sif. I say again. It really matters that he targeted Sif for this con. And yes, sure, part of his reasoning is jealousy over her close relationship with Thor (thorki is canon, y’all). But another part is this: Sif is the only other (that we know of) gender nonconforming person in Asgard, and definitely the only other one that we see as being close to his social circle. But where she is celebrated as a woman who is active and successful in traditionally culturally masculine pursuits, Loki’s gender nonconformity—his failure to live up to Asgardian masculine ideals—gets him demeaned, derided, dismissed. The gender fuckery going on here is that he is furious at the difference in how their GNC-ness is treated. His resentment and anger at that injustice, and he's being a right bastard in expressing it. We stan.

(I also do think there is something genderqueer in how the trickster considers using a feminine appearance to be just one potential tool in his arsenal, the kinda just shrugging and doing whatever works for his purposes rather than getting worked up about having to do such a thing? I mean. So shocking for a trickster figure, right? But hold that thought.)

So that was where I was with it for several years. But I kept coming back to how relatable Loki is to me as a trans masc person, and trying to figure out why it was that way, and what that had to do with this particular arc, and then it finally hit me.

This scene.

“Thus is Loki truly beautiful.”

In this scene, Loki has just been able to finally return to his male body (with Hela’s help), and he expresses his relief and joy in it, all while the art makes him look… kinda grotesque. And my gods that is such a trans masc mood. Knowing that while you pretend to be a woman you’ll be seen as nonthreatening and acceptable, and maybe you can put up with that for practical or social reasons for a while, but it isn’t how you want to live your life, it isn’t how you want to be seen, it isn’t the appearance that makes you happy. Constantly hearing how by changing your form you’ll be changing from sexy and desirable to ugly and monstrous… but thus you are truly beautiful to your own eyes.

(I think it is worth pointing out here, for anyone who might not know, that it is not uncommon for trans masc folks to have a phase of trying to go hard femme before they really accept themselves as trans. I personally didn’t, but I can imagine that the exaggerated femme lady Loki might be familiar to some of those guys. I, on the other hand, had a phase of treating my afab body as a tool that wasn’t really connected to me, so there are some other bits of the lady Loki arc that I find familiar. And here I should note that I’m not saying JMS had all this in mind, I have no idea whether he did or not, but death of the author, baby. The interpretation is very much there.)

And there is another little bit that I want to mention. There is one point where Fandral says to lady Loki, “even when you thought you were a man, you weren’t the man you thought you were.”

And. Firstly, screw you Fandral. Seriously. Secondly, the interpretation of this arc as being related to trans femininity gets a lot more press but that is an insult that is far more relevant to trans masc folks. The insults against Loki’s masculinity are reminiscent of how trans guys are not seen as real men, especially if they are GNC in any way, as Loki is. Loki may be amab, but his struggles are so incredibly similar to trans masc struggles (and really, I can’t be the only trans guy who fuckin loves that: a character who feels so familiar and relatable, flawed and angry and messed up in ways that I know all too well, but also has the goddamn body I wish I had. It’s the perfect combination.)

So yeah. That’s the short version, at least, of the rant about what everyone gets wrong about the lady Loki arc. The sexism, and complicated gender politics, is a thing it is commenting on, and I don't see how so many folks miss that.

#replies #anon #ty nonny! <3 #grand unified theory of loki

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showtoonzfan · 2 years

Text

For Father’s Day, the official Helluva Boss account has revealed Stolas’s father, PAIMON.

https://twitter.com/impmurderpros/status/1538620179390664705?s=21&t=OlwXlsd23CeHd6x9OFptiw

Before I get to the actual Paimon in demonology, let’s talk about this alone. First of all, the animation is cool as shit, I’ll admit. I love how you can see him transforming into multiple things, it’s nice to look at! I’ll also say that his design isn’t bad! First of all, I’m glad that he ACTUALLY looks like a damn OWL unlike Stolas, so there’s that, in fact, mans looks more like Stolas than STOLAS does. I’m also digging his color palette! It’s nice to see other colors than red, and brown and orange actually go well together in my eyes! (Though it wasn’t the best idea to put him in a brown background.) While I wish we could have seen the full body to get a look at the design, it’s not bad. Now of course, even though I say it’s not bad, I think they could have done a little more. What?….y’all weren’t expecting nitpicking? Y’all must not know me lol. Even though I like the owl look, he’s just an owl with a crown and that’s it. (And I’m talking about his normal look, so the other forms he turns into doesn’t count) perhaps they could have added symbols on his mask, or make his crown look more unique, or his cloak. I’m nitpicking though, it’s similar to my opinion on Vaggie’s redesign, where it wasn’t by any means bad, but they could have done more.

Now that that’s out of the way, let’s get to the actual Paimon in demonology, then I’ll discuss my thoughts on that, as well as what it could mean for the show! So for those who don’t know, “Paimon”, is a demon king who is part of the Ars Goetia. This is his original depiction:

((Piamon (also known Paymon, Bayemont) is the Ninth Spirit, a great king (governs 200 legions), and the most loyal to Lucifer. He has the power of air and is known as the Host of Spirits. He is the teacher of all arts, sciences, and hidden secrets. He used to be a Dominion angel. Paimon is depicted as a man with an effeminate face (a strong man with a woman's face according to other scholars), wearing a precious crown, and riding a dromedary. Before him often goes a host of demons and ghouls with the shape of men, playing trumpets, cymbals, and any other sort of musical instruments. He has a great voice and roars as soon as he arrives, speaking in this manner for a while, until the conjurer compels him and then he answers clearly the questions he is asked. It is said that Paimon is an extremely unrelenting opponent, in both his manipulation and hostility towards humans. He maliciously inflicts severe psychological, physical and spiritual torment upon his victims, including reconstruction of traumatic events, as well as horrifying visions and nightmares. Paimon is full of energy. Loud noises and bright lights tend to make him more active. He can also be surprisingly very colorful and very friendly. Out of all the Goetia demons, Paimon has some of the strongest loyalties to Lucifer. He has an unnaturally loud voice and when continuing speaking at such ear-splitting volume the summoner has to command Paimon to alter his speech in order to understand him.))

Of course, Viv’s depiction of him is different, so let’s discuss that, as well as some of the issues I have. Of course I want to say that like I said before, Viv’s version of demonology characters doesn’t EXACTLY need to be 100% like the original depictions. They are HER characters after all, and in this version, Paimon is an Owl demon who is related to Stolas. Still of course, I do have my worries and issues. The main and most important one is……well why make Paimon Stolas’s father??? This might come of as nitpicking, but it feels…..random. Sure, both demonology characters are fallen Angel’s and teachers, but there’s no real reason to make them related. In fact, someone like Paimon would fit for more of a tutor or associate for Stolas rather than his biological father, but that’s just my opinion. Usually when it comes to Viv’s demonology characters, they always feel like they’re who they are for no reason other than it’s hell. Viv changes the personality and look of the character anyway, and she never even USES said character to their occupation or more to speak, potential. The only reason I say all of this is that I’m scared that Paimon won’t be used to his full potential either. It’s ironically similar to my criticism with Stolas, where YES, he’s “Stolas”, but everything that the original Stolas represented isn’t really there. Sure, he has a book and seems to have an astronomy aesthetic, but like I said before, it’s more of a background thing, whereas the character UPFRONT is just this horny gay guy and that’s it. While his book contributes to the story, part of the problem is that we still don’t KNOW what his job is, or even how he rules as a prince or his duties, so instead we’re just stuck with the character who is labeled as Stolas, but in reality he could have been replaced with an original royal character instead of a demonology one. I’m afraid that’s going to happen with Paimon, where Viv is just….“yeah this is THE Paimon”, but just slap another character who has either a swearing ego or is your typical evil not understanding father. Of course, yes…I KNOW season 2 isn’t even out yet, and the first episode actually SEEMS to be finally leaning into what exactly Stolas does, what his job and occupation as a ruler is etc, but I sincerely hope everything is done for a REASON. Show us why Paimon is Stolas’s father, show us why another demonology character like Andrealphus is his brother in law, etc. I just don’t want these characters to be who they are for no reason ya know? As a writer, almost everything needs to happen for a reason. Even if the depiction is different, there’s a chance to deep dive into what this Paimon does and how he influences Stolas. I really hope we get some good lore of course, and since this episode MIGHT be a flashback, I hope it isn’t vague or background lore like what we’ve been getting in season 1.

Finally, what could this mean for the show?

Well, I’m assuming since Paimon is mostly known for teaching art, science, and having knowledge of all earth, he will teach that to Stolas, hence he will probably be the one to provide him this book. For Viv’s version, it’ll probably be a multiple generation thing, where Stolas gets the book, and then it’ll be his responsibility to lend the book to his offspring in the future. Due to that, I’m certainly wondering what they’re going to do with Paimon, what HIS job and occupation is, aka his purpose as another royalty member since here, both him and Stolas aren’t fallen Angel’s. When it comes to the book, the obvious question is what you DO when you are given it, so I sincerely hope that question will be answered in this episode. There’s so many, what Paimon does, why he needs to lend his offspring the book, whats his view on the occupation he has and how he sees Hell’s class, how STOLAS feels about these duties, what is the book’s purpose to this world of hell, why choose the members of the Ars Goetia as characters, there’s just a LOT of questions, and it certainly doesn’t help that the lore itself we get in the show is always vague or crumbs of information. We don’t even KNOW what Stolas’s job is, so it’s kinda hard to theorize what this could mean for him, especially since the book itself (for now) feels more like a portal plot device than anything else. Obviously I’m assuming his father will teach him about earth, astronomy, and how to be a good ruler of course. There’s potential for Paimon to be interesting, since he is depicted as “surprisingly being friendly ”, it would be cool for him to be that character that acts and seems very gentle and nurturing, but is actually very manipulative and a monster that you wouldn’t want to mess with deep down……BUUUUT I don’t think that’s what we’re ganna get. You all knew this was coming, but despite everything I’ve said, I’m not expecting a lot, more like the bare minimum. Like the critical fandom has already said, Paimon will probably be your stern, mean, controlling abusive father you’ve seen a million times in other films and tv. He’ll of course probably be prejudice and who could forget HOMOPHOBIC, not understanding of his son and just that old mean mentor who goes “Son, you must be fit to rule, son, you must take this job seriously, son you can’t show weakness, son, those below us are weak”— all that jazz. I also have the feeling he won’t be subtle at all too, like the writers are instantly going to make him mean and cruel upfront to prove he’s a dick. I’m afraid he’s just going to be ANOTHER pawn, a character in Stolas’s life that’s worse than him so the audience can sympathize and feel bad for him, and I’m sick of the writers doing this. It doesn’t help that season 2 has yet to show Andrealphus, ANOTHER character who’s whole purpose is likely to be mean to the uwu owl birb so we can feel more bad for him. I hate how predictable everything feels, I can already SMELL this episode just existing to show how “sad” his life as a baby was, and how abusive his father is and there’s just no fun in it. My expectations are VERY low for Paimon, he’ll probably just be a controlling father who wants to keep to the social norms (without explaining properly what said social norm is like) and as for the lore with the book and the occupations, I doubt much will be done with it. Viv will probably just be vague again and move on to the next thing without showing or explaining properly how anything works, but…..we’ll see.

This episode of course has potential to be really interesting, I actually wouldn’t mind it being a full on flashback episode, just young Stolas and his father teaching him the ways (it would also a breath of fresh air to get away from our annoying main imp characters sorry not sorry) but yeah, my expectations are still low. I sincerely do hope season 2 is better than season 1, cause season one is just BURSTING with issues (expect more posts on that soon!) but as long as Viv and Brandon are on the writers team, I’m not expecting much. We don’t know what will happen in the future, but all I can pray for is that it’s an improvement from the first season. 😬

#vivziepop critical #spindlehorse critical #anti vivziepop #vivziepop #vivienne medrano #helluva boss critical #helluva boss #helluva boss season 2 #helluva boss Paimon #Paimon #vivziepop demonology #helluva boss criticism #helluva boss Stolas #helluva boss predictions #brandon rogers

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sokkastyles · 2 years

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Let’s Read ATLA: The Search pp151-209

So I’m surprised that this was a part of the story I haven’t been spoiled on but I’m pretty sure I know what’s going on here. Yes, Ursa, it IS strange. I think you should run.

Yep. But also wtf. Ursa didn’t want to leave and Ikem is making this all about him. The whole thing where he has a new identity and doesn’t tell Ursa at first is also super creepy.

So while Ursa was stuck married to Ozai and had to watch him destroy her children, she wrote letters to Ikem - because she did love him! - because he was the only thing that gave her hope. And I can see why Ursa, as wrongheaded as that was, would want to believe that Zuko was Ikem’s. But Ikem didn’t receive her letters and went off into the spirit forest to become an incel, apparently.

Of course Zuko is willing to give up finding Ursa to help the waterbender and her brother, because they need the help more. He’s grown so much from the selfish person that was obsessed with his own honor that we first saw in book one of ATLA. And of course Azula sees that as a sign of her brother’s “weakness.” That also echoes what Ozai told Zuko about being Fire Lord, that he shouldn’t worry about morality because whatever decision he makes is the right one. Azula is also still stuck in that mindset, which is why she says that Zuko is weak even when he is strong, i.e., he’s the fire lord, so he should be just taking what he wants.

There’s just not enough of a narrative reason for Zuko to believe that this is the best chance of finding Ursa, though. Of course it is, but I don’t feel like the writing made that clear enough to the characters, who just stumble from one spirit shenanigan to another.

I like how the spirit, who announces herself as kind and benevolent, chose to honor Azula’s request even though she blatantly interrupted.

“As plain as can be.” That’s a bit harsh, isn’t it?

So then Azula runs off because her entire motive is to like, kill Ursa or something. I guess that was the point of the whole hallucination plotline, so that Azula could have a motive for going with them. It’s still stupid, though. I don’t think Azula’s motive is just to kill Ursa, though. I think she also wants to reconcile the part of herself that knows, deep down, that her mother loved her, and is desperate for that love. But again, they could have done that without implying that Azula is CrAzY.

Nobody told me about this I have Important Questions. Like: Noren WTF?

Some of y’all acting like Ursa chose to forget her children without a second thought. Like, this traumatized woman is forced to leave her children with her abuser to save one of her children, knowing that he’ll probably be harmed anyway, and NOBODY told me that Ikem was the one who pressured her into forgetting her family because he’s a weirdo incel. It’s also really sus that Ikem gets to keep his memories and KNOWS who Ursa really is. And at this point Ursa has nowhere else to go, so she basically is reliant on this guy who has this weird kind of power over her, but at least he’s not Ozai, I guess.

But WHERE is the AU where Ursa gets a new face but keeps her memories, and finds a way to integrate into her children’s lives and protect them from afar?

“Not the OTHER pair of siblings that keep shooting fire at each other, they’re with me, but - “

I think the “everyone wants to be beautiful without realizing they already are” thing is a good sentiment, but Mother of Faces herself was the one who said Noriko was ugly. And yeah, that isn’t what Rafa needs.

Would Zuko ask for a new, unscarred face if he had the chance? Would he ask to not look like his father? Would he also want to forget who he is, especially now that he’s questioning whether he wants to be Fire Lord?

See, now, Ma’am, you can’t be all “the humans are insulting my work” when you’re like “I’ll sell you this poor sad sack for a buck fifty.”

The Mother of Faces is the one who offers Ursa the chance to forget, and I don’t think Ikem knew that she could do that so it’s not like Ikem intentionally wanted Ursa to forget, and Ursa is the one who accepts, and chooses to remember Ikem but not anything about her life with Ozai. It’s still creepy that Ikem has knowledge about Ursa’s old life that she doesn’t. Ursa makes the decision to forget her children in a moment of incredible pain while dealing with this trauma. She might have changed her mind later but can’t because she’s not even aware of what she lost. and so many people on tumblr write about this as if she made this decision callously just because she wanted to be with her lover, when she doesn’t really have much of another choice and right now Ikem is the only thing in her life that’s good. And to be fair, Ikem doesn’t try to hide Ursa’s old life from her when her kids come around. I still don’t like this, though, and Ursa is still a traumatized victim who is being retraumatized by this whole thing.

This man knows exactly who Zuko is and could have turned him away and even thought he was making the right decision by sparing his wife, and Ursa would have been none the wiser. It’s still shitty that Ursa doesn’t get to make that decision, but at least Noren isn’t trying to make it for her. Or for Zuko, who is welcomed by this family more than his own.

Zuko, honey.

Aaaand there we cut to another plotline. That’s a critique of this storyline I’ve already read, and it’s a consistent problem with these comics. You might think, “but surely we’ll come back to this part and not skip the emotional climax.” You would think.

I KNEW Koh was involved somehow!

So we get another story within a story of an estranged mother and son with the face/identity theme.

Then we go back to Zuko, but instead of getting Ursa’s reaction to Zuko’s revelation, Noren does most of the talking.

Oh, Zuko.

Then Azula comes in.

I compared the story of the Mother of Faces and Koh the Face-Stealer to Zuko looking for his mom, but maybe the comparison should be to Ursa and Azula, Azula resenting her estranged mother and blaming her for what she became.

And I know people dislike Kiyi as a character but none of this is her fault. I agree about the criticisms of Kiyi as a “replacement” for Azula but the thing is, she also exists as a foil and parallel to Azula herself. Azula terrorizing this young girl by threatening her mother because she was traumatized as a young girl over the loss of her mother. That’s the cycle of abuse for you, folks.

Neither Ursa nor Azula have the full understanding of the reality of their situations, but they still obviously care about each other.

Zuko moves to defend Ursa and maybe if he hadn’t done that, Ursa and Azula might have reached some reconciliation, but Zuko’s not wrong for being scared and wanting to protect his mother.

Azula says that if she kills Ursa then both she and Zuko will be free, because Zuko will also be free of a throne he doesn’t want. It won’t make either of them free, though. Zuko knows that because Azula right now is a lot like he used to be, angry and taking all that anger out on everyone around her because she thinks it’ll make her free.

This in contrast to Ursa choosing to forget broken family relationships. I think seeing what happened with Ursa makes Zuko want to try even harder with Azula.

But, like all the times Zuko lashed out at Iroh, Azula can’t handle her brother genuinely trying to reach out because it contradicts that world she’s built up to cope with her own trauma.

There is a part of Azula that wants to accept the love from her brother and mother (even if Ursa doesn’t remember being Azula’s mother, she did offer her love in that scene). But she can’t. It hurts too much. So she falls back on the old belief, that Zuko showing her love is just a weakness. Azula is also recognizing that Zuko showed strength by not giving up on being Fire Lord, although not for the reasons Azula sees the throne as valuable. Zuko knows he can’t give up the throne because it’s not just about himself, it’s about a duty to the world.

Mommy, I think we’ve angered the spirits now.

#atla comics #the search #atla comics critical #ursa #ikem #zuko #azula

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chaosmarshmallow · 2 years

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HIII!!

I hope you wouldn’t care if i send in a request to you, but i hope your days going fantastic as usual:) here i go!!

Can you do Eddie Munson with a S/O who has a Brawler Personality From Akudama Drive??

Stay healthy & safe my friend!!

A/N: Hey heyyy!! Ofc I don't mind! i'm doing great, I hope your day is going great too :D

Lmao, I finished this a bit earlier than I expected, but oh well!

I tried my best, I hope you enjoy :D

Tw: Violence, swearing,

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eddie had seen you around school sometimes before.

It was kinda hard to miss you actually, with your punk like clothing and with you loudly challenging everyone that you thought was strong.

It happened more than once that in the middle of the hallway, during the breaks, you walked up to some poor schoolmate and asked them to fight you.

They of course had no other choice than agreeing.

After all, nobody wanted to anger you.

And they, of course, never won.

Just like everyone at school, he had a healthy amount of fear towards you, trying his best to stay away from you as much as possible even though he was a bit intrigued by you.

He loved your style and suspected that maybe you liked metal too?

Luckily for him, you didn’t think of him as a possible match.

Though he didn't really know how to feel about the fact that you thought he was weak.

His first time really speaking with you was… slightly embarrassing? Some basketball players had pushed him on the floor and thought it was funny to kick and throw dirt at him, calling him a freak and other things, the usual stuff.

Only this time, you were there. Suddenly, like some vengeful spirit you appeared behind one of the bullies and grabbed him by the neck so tight it made him yelp like some little girl.

“Say, what do we have here?” You drawled, a large grin on your face. For a fleeting moment he feared that you would join in and maybe even challenge him to a fight. “Trying to show who’s the strongest, ey? Say why don’t y’all fight me, so we”ll truly see who’s stronger!”

Of course, everyone of the group that even had a single brain cell ran away like the devil was hot on their heels.

And of course there were also some dumbasses who thought they could handle you…

They couldn’t.

After that accident, you sometimes hang out with him, mostly staying by his side like some guardian angel, protecting him from bullies.

And after a couple of talks, it turned out that his suspicions were correct! You did like metal, so you bonded over a mutual love for Iron Maiden

He really enjoyed your company, but his shoulder and wrist began to ache from all the fist bumps you gave.

Eddie always thought you were some aggressive buffoon that bullied people like him and loved making people feel weak and unimportant.

And to a certain extent that impression was correct, you were aggressive, but you were no bully and didn’t stand for making people feel unimportant, the weak part was correct however.

It didn’t take long for him to notice how much value you put in strength and in being the strongest.

He wondered where that came from, but he wasn’t going to ask, still kinda afraid of you.

You were… special. Nothing like he expected at all.

But when you came to his hiding spot at Reefer Rick's, together with Dustin and his friends after the Chrissy incident, well… to say he was surprised would be an understatement. For a second he thought he was just imagining things, but no there you were, standing with your arms crossed at the back of the group.

Apparently you also helped them fight some monster called the mind flayer and Russians, which… was a bit strange but after what he’d seen, he believed every word they said.

When he asked you why you helped him, you just answered “You’re not strong enough to do something like that.” with a shrug.

Not… not the answer he expected but okay.

You were, somehow, also friends with Robin and apparently she has asked you to help them in finding and helping/protecting him.

Apparently you had punched Jason so hard in the face that he lost consciousness when he was spouting some nonsense about Eddie being a satanist or some shit.

You bought him a new cassette player and tapes of bands he liked to keep him occupied while he was hiding, which was surprisingly sweet of you.

You were a bit of a meathead or simpleminded, act first (mostly with your fists), think later kinda person, but you were loyal.

Which was really proven at Watergate, with you jumping after Robin without a second thought.

With everyone gone, it seemed like he had no other choice but to follow, even though he really didn’t wanna.

When he got through the gate, the first thing he saw was you, letting loose on some poor bat that had the misfortune of being your chosen victim.

You were, softly put, absolutely impressive and looked crazy as hell, with an imensive grin on your face. Laughing like some maniac as you threw it on the ground and shifted your attention to your next prey, screaming something along the lines of “Hah! These are some of the easiest opponents I’ve ever fought!” or “Come here ya small fry, let me show you real power!”.

Too shocked by your actions he didn’t notice the bats coming towards him, until he saw you running towards him and plucking one from right beside his head and smashing it on the ground, giving it a last stomp for good measure.

“Watch out, metal man!” You said while patting him on the shoulder (though it was more of a punch than a pat, making him almost fall over). “Ah-Yeah yeah, right.” He answered gulping, holding the pedal he took with him ready. You let out a buldering laugh and shook your head. “Fine, I’ll protect you! That’s what strong people are supposed to do anyway!”

And you did exactly as you promised. Beating all the bats that got close to him to the ground with your bare fists, like some barbarian, b̶u̶t̶ a̶ v̶e̶r̶y̶ h̶o̶t̶ b̶a̶r̶b̶a̶r̶i̶a̶n̶ i̶f̶ h̶e̶ s̶a̶i̶d̶ s̶o̶ h̶i̶m̶s̶e̶l̶f̶.

With your help, it barely took any time to take care of all the bats.

“HAHAH! You weaklings, this was too easy!” You cackled like some madman and posed with your hands on your hips. After your boasting you turned to him and put your hand on his shoulder, surprisingly gentle. “Are ya okay?” He blinked a couple of times with his eyes, too surprised to answer, but eventually nodded.

Immediately after that you turned to the others and asked screaming if Robin was okay, which she was.

“Well, let’s go forth then! We can’t stay here and wait for new bats to come.” You said, while the others nodded in agreement.

Eddie was still a bit shocked by your display of power though, he knew you were strong, but seeing it like this was something completely different from how he saw it before.

Eddie rn: Well, mark me down as horny and scared!

#eddie x reader #eddie stranger things #eddie munson #eddie my beloved #eddie munson x reader #brawler #akudama drive #akudama brawler #requests #x reader

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brittanyautumn333 · 7 months

Text

Literally have lost everything over the past 2 years. I try not to do tarot readings on myself; they make me paranoid. Sometimes I don’t want to understand. Sitting in ignorance is more comfortable sometimes, and I am meant to learn certain lessons alone.

BUTTTTTT….I have over the past 6 weeks 😅

….I love being right 🤣 except I’m scared.

I got 2 DIFFERENT fortunes (1 from a fortune cookie, the other from an herbal bath from my local botanica) BOTH of them basically said “something that feels like a loss right now is about to turn into your greatest victory”. Confirmed with a 9 of wands 😅

I’m so ready for this abundance y’all 😭 please !!! I was curious about the 8 of wands. So I pulled a card to clarify - strength. Spirit said HOLD THE FUCK ON DONT GIVE UP NOW 😤 the original card in that particular spread - The Tower.

Of course it would come in the middle of my “oh shit” moment, and not a second before. Would I have accepted it in any other way but this one? If I didn’t have to fight, kick, scream and cry for it, wouldn’t I have just written it off as too good for me? Sabotaging each step of the way? Yeah. 2022 Brittany definitely would have. I have a hard time swallowing nice things. I didn’t grow up around nice things, and DEFINITELY not nice people.

Religion and spirituality felt like something that stopped after you walk out of church doors. After Sunday service, it was always back to the lab again. I was always taught that life and pain were the price of sin. I have discovered that pain is an option. Life is all about perception. If you think God/the universe is out to get you, and always sending the negative, that is exactly what you’ll get. The last 2 years, I lost someone who I thought was the love of my life, my home, my dog, ALL of my friends, multiple jobs, family members, and now I’m having to leave the safe space that has held me close when I have needed a place to scream, cry, and mourn. I struggled with addictions here in this place.

How do I explain to everybody that the reason I lost 100 pounds in 5 months is because I couldn’t afford to eat? $20 an hour is too much for food stamps, but what if I cover every bill alone? I’ve faced so much depression. I hate dead end jobs, and I want to follow my passions. But breathing costs money basically, and esthetician school isn’t cheap. Even with financial aid, I need books. Supplies. Gas to get there. Not to even mention mental space and energy to do that AND work a full time and part time job. It seems impossible.

I developed scarcity mindset, as I seriously struggled to stay afloat financially. I took care of everything myself. if I don’t, who will? I’ve struggled with pride and shame every step of the way. I hate feeling like I’m complaining. I don’t want pity, I’m grown and capable. Life just doesn’t always go the way that we plan it. I haven’t had a leg up in a long time. The wheel of fortune is a card I’ve been seeing a lot too - strings are being pulled behind the scenes. The wheel is moving in ways that I can’t reach with my hands.

BUT

Here at this house I have also laughed, learned, grown, and learned that there is no one but me who can wake myself up in the morning. My life has been hard, yeah. I can sit in that, fall back into addiction. Sit in the comfort of my misery. OR. I keep moving forward. Even when I don’t know what the road ahead looks like, and I don’t have any shoes on.

Ace of swords. Knight of swords. 8 of wands.

The smoke is about to clear. Quick. I’ve experienced something unexplainable and beautiful in the face of destruction. Break down…to build up.

10 of cups.

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bananaapplewaffle · 1 year

Text

Scalding Sands Al’ab Nariya | A Firelit Sky over the Sands Books: 3, 4 & 5 + Vignettes

Book 3: Bazaar Exploration

A Traditional Holiday & Getting Into the Spirit

Ah here’s the Aladdin lore

…I’m gonna be real

I barely remember actual movie

The KH story…

Or even the 2019 movie ( I really only remember the songs from that).

But uh— I feel like they cut a lot out and took uh some creative liberties.

Was there a firework show…

I feel like that was only in Aladdin and Genie’s meeting…unless that happen in the actual story

Man ion

All Over the Place & A Hungry Monster

If y’all don’t feed my brother

He will become Abu and start committing steal

Give 👏 me 👏 more👏 meat👏

Grim, take your time! Savor it!

…

Grim I swear to god…

I CAN’T BELIEVE IT

THAT’S SOME REAL SIBLINGS SHIT RIGHT

“I know we don’t really look alike—” Y’all literally look alike but okay

Why are y’all surprised

CATER

YOU BITCH

Silk City’s Produce & Just How We Are

Jamil

You just gonna say that

In front of us

Like that

Wow

Virgo Shit tbh

IS THAT A FUCKEN PAOPU

Highkey what is Malleus talkin about

Oh that looks good

Did he not spilt an apple and some bread with Abu

Also I can’t believe this

Abu erasure

NOW JAMIL IS TALKING ABOUT THE LEGEND OF THE PAOPU

GIRL THEY STEALING

It’s cuz it the fruit, Cater.

Maybe next time

Tower Baguettes & Playful Streak

Wow this whole Book is just eating, huh

Ah there’s where the bread comes in

I feel like he shared it with Abu only but I deadass don’t remember

Shit I love me some bread

I mean I didn’t ask for help, but sure

Ah there’s the commit steal and on the run part

But without the steal

…

Someone get they brother

…

Did the urn actually not have a bottom in Aladdin

Or is another steal from Kingdom Hearts cuz there’s a heartless that does that

Grim…what are you doing?

If its that hot then you don’t need to be on the ground

Your poor paw pads…

WE’RE STILL CONSUMING???

Allow Me & By My Reckoning & Doing Just Fine

Wrong part, Grim…

MALLEUS RAW STRENGTH DRACONIA IN THE BUILDING

Oh lawd not a bug

He probably almost sent all the stalls on fire

I FUCKEN KNEW IT

Girl not the trauma

Grim please…

WITH WHAT MONEY

God I feel like I know this toy

Its on the edge of my memories

Oh fuck

We lost the prince

Book 4: A Change in Location

Actual Gold & Down the Middle!

Oh wow he really knew where to look

WELP

HAI KALIM

A;LKXDLA;KD;LSALDALSDLA

HELLO

THE BELLS ON WHOSE CLOTHES HAVE WHAT ON WHAT

Take this shit off me

GIRL

THEY GOT US ON LOCK

ABU IS THAT YOU

Alright y’all what would gramps want?

Y’ALL WHAT

GIRL

Refrain from Comment & Fortune-Telling

I fucken hate it

Which means Lilia will probs love it

Wait wait wait

This tacky ass shirt’s tagline is:

“Liberated attire for those freed from their shackles”

A fucken choice that was

Moving all the way on

Oh wait, come back

I forgot Genie wore a tacky ass shirt

Okay sure whatever

GIRL THE FUCKEN MUSIC

THE LOOK ON MALLES’ FACE

AS TREY SUGGESTED GETTING SPICES

SALDSDASDLAD;’DLALSD

MALLEUS REALLY SAID

“If he makes something with the ingredients you bought, I’m coming for both y’all asses.”

Not Cater being into Astrology

Cuz he is gonna be the best mage, Trey.

Poor Grim.

It’s okay, I believe in you!

A Family Heirloom & Stretching Super Long

That man do be getting worked up

AWWW YOU’RE GETTING’EM FOR MY BOYS

Good grades and focus, huh….

Seems about right

OH NO

MALLEUS

MALLEUS PLEASE STAY CALM

Chile lemme gon head and get a scarf too

Can’t Set Them Off & Just an Employee

WHO STOLE THE DETONATOR

GIRL THE USB STICK

I GOTTA GOOOOOOOOO

IT WAS THE FUCKEN MONKEY

ABU GET YO ASS BACK HERE

MALLEUS NO YOU’RE TOO POWERFUL

Not rue the day…

Trey shoulda took off his glasses

GET HIS AS GRIM

You have my permission

And then Jamil beat his ass and saved the day

YIPEE

Book 5: Firework Celebration

Worth Cheering For & Especially Nice

Mint lemonade…

How things collide

I refuse to elaborate

Damn I kinda really wanna try it tho

I did actually buy the lamp from the shop lol

GIRL

ITS THE FLASH OF THE INSANE SMILE FOR MEEEEEEE

Okay so…this is the shortest twistune,

One of the shortest events,

And like

Really could have spent less time eating

And some time learning that dance at the end

Cuz that’s not the type of dance you can get just by looking

That’s a practice a week before the function kind of dance

MY HEART

JAMIL

AUGH

MY HEART

What a nice end card

Vignettes

An Expert Opinion (Part One) | Cater - Silk Adorned

My boys look so upset

And just like that

After the promise of getting something

They (Ace) are fine

Riddle—Ace and Deuce are the only pumped ones here

And they’re not even going???

Jamil watching with a Virgo eye

That’s literally the perk of being a Virgo.

We just be seeing shit

Cater really said

“Ion, you pick”

An Expert Opinion (Part Two) | Cater - Silk Adorned

Really reading the fuck outta you

Yellow: For the bolder Cater

Black and White: For the don’t stand out too much Cater

Salmon Pink: For the gentle Cater

And yet,

There is still more to Cater

AND THEY REFUSE TO EXPLORE IT

I WANT HIM TO OVERBLOT

It’s Not Magic | Trey- Silk Adorned

I thought we got there way closer to the time…

My brother—he’s so happy

Don’t you dare

SALDKLA;SDKK;DKLA;DKAL;DKD

[image of me and jamil being the same]

I SWEAR I DIDN’T KNOW HE’D SAY THIS

Oh girl we’re in science class

I hope everyone has on their lab coat and goggles

Oh my

I forgot this man was in the Science Club

Bro I hated the snake ones when I was little

It looked like poop

Rather Enjoyable | (Part One) | Malleus - Silk Adorned

Oop

And this is where he got separated

And here’s Kalim!

Sweetheart, you are lost.

Oh no

They’re in a tourist trap!

They got out

But where will they go next

FIND OUT NEXT TIME ON—

Rather Enjoyable | (Part Two) | Malleus- Silk Adorned

Oh an antique shop

Then man said “Lemme pop a squat and get ta reading”

WHAT

ITS WRITTEN IN AN EXTINCT LANGUAGE

What’s happening next week?

FIND OUT NEXT TIME ON—

#waffle plays #waffle plays twst #twst al'ab nariya

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somenoobgirl · 1 year

Text

So I tried to write a Sans Au ship child fanfiction- 🫠

“So… do you like him?” Pallete inquired.

"Yes."

“Is he gay?” Palette wanted to know, slightly intrigued. “Oh wait, you can tell me if you want. It’s fine. You don’t have to feel obligated.

“Yeah, he’s gay. I-I think.” Crescent responded. He had never been on a date before. As much as he tried to like those girls from school who always hung out around school, they weren’t as attractive as Gradient. His childhood best friend and crush. When it came to romance, he preferred the boys over girls. It wasn’t really that his tastes were defined by gender. No, what bothered him was that in spite of all his efforts, he just couldn’t muster up any attraction to females. At least not enough to really pursue anything with them. Maybe once he got over the feeling of having his heart broken. But as he sat there, mindlessly looking at Gradient’s profile picture on his phone screen and back at Pallete, his… frenemy. “Well, I think y’all are cute together.” Pallete said proudly. “Y’all are SUPER gay for each other. Or just gay-“

“Palette! SHUT UP!” The last part came out before he realized what he was saying. Luckily he stopped speaking after hearing that. A look of horror was apparent on his face. “Gradient just texted me…” Crescent said, shaken. “Well great! Perfect time to tell him how you feel!!” Pallete said, a little too enthusiastically.

Crescent laughed, but quickly regained control of himself. “This isn’t funny! We aren’t dating.”

“You sure? You two have seriously made out at least twice-“

“SHUT THE FUCK UP! I KNOW WHAT WE DID! AND STOP ACTING LIKE THAT WASN’T SOME KIND OF PROPOSAL!”

“Hey! So this is more than just two friends hooking up! They were already friends, then they went on a date, and then things got… serious. If I didn’t know better, I would say they were getting engaged or something.” Pallete said cheerfully.

“…I’ll just call him” Crescent says, practically giving up-

“That’s the spirit!” Pallete yells. Crescent looked down at his phone screen and typed Gradient’s number into the search bar on the browser. Just as he pressed send, his phone began vibrating on the table in front of him. A text message popped up on the screen.

“Yo Crez, what up? Meet me at the back of the Arcade at 12:00 tonight. We gotta talk.” Gradient texted. A chill ran down Crescent’s spine. What the hell does that mean?

“NO WAY- MAYBE HE’S GONNA ASK YOU OUT-“ Pallete screams. He put Crescent in a headlock, making him scream like a girl.

---*-

Gradient had only just arrived when Crescent stepped through the door. Like usual, there was a crowd. Some from outside the arcade.

“Soo…” Crescent started, “What did you wanna talk about?”

“You and I.” Gradient said, with a cold look on his face. He was always so serious…

For such a young guy, his presence almost seemed menacing. Not that Crescent was scared or anything, just apprehensive.

Crescent bit the inside of his cheek. Was this it? Was Gradient going to end their friendship?

“Okay..? What about.. us?” Crescent asked, more nervous than before.

“The whole… friends with benefits thing. I genuinely like you.” Gradient said, more serious than ever. “I think we could be good together. We make a good team, and I know you’d be happy doing it long term. I mean, we don’t have to have SEX all the time or anything. Just.. hug and kiss. Or whatever it is couples do…” Gradient said.

This was so awkward. In his mind, they hadn’t even crossed that line yet. Why now??!! Gradient continued on, looking more upset than usual. “It might be nice to actually get to know you better, Crescent. I mean sure, we’ve known each other since we were two. We’re fifteen now. But I would like to get to know you as a partner and not a fuck buddy. Y’know? Be able to trust you enough to sleep next to you.” Gradient explained, holding out his hand towards Crescent.

Crescent stared at Gradient’s hand in awe.

It took him a few seconds to realize what Gradient was asking. How much has he told him? What will I do if he rejects my advances?? He took Gradient’s hand, shaking it firmly. “Okay.. Fine.”

Gradient’s expression went from serious to… happy? Relived? Maybe a mix of both.

“I-Is this what I think it means..?” Gradient cautiously asked.

“Yes, Gradient! I would love to be your boyfriend!” Crescent says, with a biggest smile he’s ever wore.

Gradient gave him a soft smile back, hugging him tightly. For some reason, it made Crescent feel like everything was alright again. Even though, their arrangement still wasn’t fully official. Yet. It was the start.

“Can… can I…” Gradient stuttered.

“What?” Crescent urged.

“C-Can I kiss you..?”

Gradient awkwardly asked. His voice was barely above a whisper. It wasn’t really what Crescent wanted to hear, but he couldn’t deny the boy his request. He nodded, hoping Gradient wouldn’t hesitate any longer.

Crescents grabbed. Gradient’s waist passionately, kissing him with full force. Gradient used his strong arms to press him closer against himself. When they pulled away, Gradient breathed heavily into Crescents ear.

“If you break my heart.. I’ll kill you” Gradient whispered.

“Okay then”

Gradient went to lean in for another kiss. Instead of putting his lips onto Crescent’s, he opened them up slightly and sucked his tongue into his mouth. He tried hard to hide the expression of shock on his face, which he probably felt all over his body. He let Crescent kiss him back passionately.

His eyes closed when Crescent finally pulled away. He quickly caught the fleeting smirk that lingered across Gradient’s face, realizing what the smaller teen must have thought about the exchange.

Gradient reached out to the taller teens hand, bringing it into his own.

“Hey, you… Want to go grab a bite to eat after? If you don’t want to stay here all night…” Gradient offered.

Crescent laughed nervously. There was nothing wrong with staying right here. The moment they decided to try something new, it wasn’t something one would immediately regret. This entire thing wasn’t very rushed, or bad timing. They had months and months to fall into a routine.

“Yeah… That sounds great. I’m starving-” Crescent confesses.

Gradient smiled widely. The two hand and hand.

“Yeah, me too.”

how’d you guys like that-

#undertale au #au sanses #ship children #first fic #my au

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femme-enby · 2 years

Text

Vent, but also if even one person bothers to read this, feel free to lemme know if and how I’m wrong because I am mad confused and frustrated.

I loooove working a job where I’m expected to work two different jobs, get windburn, drown in the condensation of my nose, work in an area that isn’t suited for me no matter what they say and unable to move to a better suited area, get put into a second position that also is not meant for me and causing the previously mentioned issues…

and be threatened with being banned from the seasonal job I actually do well in (both as an employee and in regards to mental and physical health) if I quit.

Truly a job that embodies the “holiday spirit” that they keep talking about, and toooootally values their employees.

All sarcasm.

I hate it. I hate the lack of even basic human respect from my own management, the manipulation especially since they’re putting a lot of the people who definitely prefer the other seasonal option into the more strenuous and stressful positions because they know the threat will work on plenty of them, the hypocrisy…

The fact that I’d take last seasons absolutely RABID guests over this, considering they made me heavily reconsider applying for this last season, is incredibly telling.

I wouldn’t suggest this to anyone, which is exactly where companies fuck up.

When they don’t ensure that their employees at least feel like they’re given an inch, just some basic human respect, then they lose returning employees and people communicate- whether you rehire them or not.

I keep hearing about people who have already quit. They ain’t gotta be here for me to hear it, and why they did.

At least one person is TRYING to get ahold of HR… although that is a whole debacle on it’s own, which raises more issues. It should not be hard to talk to HR. While HR at my previous job left plenty to be desired, at the very least we were ENCOURAGED to simply walk into HR if we needed to, AND be on the clock to do so- even would have us clock in early if need be.

HR shouldn’t be a whole fight to talk to, it shouldn’t be a fight at all for some basic human decency to begin with!

It’s insanity, and it will bite them in the ass. Sooner rather than later at this point, because ain’t anyone happy about the current situation, and it would likely take a lot to fix it, especially if they stick to their guns this whole season.

What’s that sayin? A lack of preparation on your part, doesn’t constitute and emergency on mine? Yeah. Just because they’re struggling to find people, doesn’t mean they should be doin this shit. Have less of whatever is necessary for the betterment of the employees, as that will result in better quality for the guests.

Idk about y’all, but I’d rather see a 3 float parade with all the safety people in place, avoiding running over someone, than a 10 float parade with bare minimum safety people and someone getting hurt because those who are working the parade are NOT comfortable.

Seriously… either I’m focused on safety or I’m trying to “fix my face” because I know a lot of the time my “smile” just looks like o_o and if I use teeth it just looks like I’m baring my teeth. Add in trying to be in character, emotionally prepping myself to perform, and still trying to scan and keep pace and be prepared?

Got me working a potentially (literally!) sticky position with sensory issues, and no easy way to clean my hands within the area? Got people stressed already bc they struggle with dyslexia or simply struggled in English literature classes in school in a position that is apparently focused on reading and writing? Not letting those people relocate or even just switch with someone else, which would ensure the same amount of people working? Approving then revoking approval of a stage name and giving someone a name that can be perceived as a reference to their weight?

Like, yeah I’m fuckin weird, but I know I ain’t wrong about at least SOME of these things being fucked up.

#ryan rambles #seriously if even one person bothers to read this lemme know if I’m just crazy

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