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justbrainrot · 1 year

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It’s time for my Legendborn characters' sexuality headcanons to be out into the world:

(Disclaimer: yes some of these characters are underage. I know. Folks’ preferences don’t come in the mail with their voter registration though. Don’t come for me about these entirely fictional characters because I’ll just block you and that’s not gratifying for either of us, ‘kay?)

That being said there is a cut this is all gonna live under lol

Bree: Our girl’s motto is, “I’ll try anything once. Or twice! Maybe it’s an acquired taste.” I mean listen, she has almost no experience prior to meeting these dudes, but she does have her big big brain & Alice. So she’s well read iykwim. And has an inherently queer sensibility when she thinks about relationships, despite how things may look from the outside. She really enjoys the negotiation prior to a scene, which makes her a natural at this poly thing. Also, she’s a switch.

Identifies as: Queer

Sel: Baby boy is a service bottom. I mean if this isn’t obvious to you maybe we can’t be friends lol. He enjoys both lightly applied sensation & some pretty heavy pain on occasion. He will definitely top & top well when told to. Sensory deprivation is 100% his jam because it turns his brain off just a li’l bit.

Identifies as: Pansexual (this is canon btw, I didn’t make this part up)

Nick: Oh my darling! Nick is the most vanilla of our trio, but that’s not saying much because, well, have you met the other two lol. He is a natural dom but is also patently disgusted by all the trappings of dominant white cishet dudes in our culture. So he’s also a unicorn, bless ‘im. He is deeply in love with Bree, which is obvious to anyone with eyes, but his feelings for Sel have been clouded by the Kingsmage Oath for so long that when it’s removed, it takes him a minute to work out that he’s in love with Sel also.

Identifies as: Bisexual

Alice: First I need to say that Alice rocks a sick lesbian manicure seven days a week & if that isn’t the hottest way to flag I don’t know what is. She is solidly femme4femme, & knows how to top from below so smoothly you’ll have no idea it’s happening until you are wondering if you forgot to set your face because it’s dripping into your eyes all of a sudden.

Identifies as: Lesbian

William: This dude is a gentleman first & foremost; he ofc redefines making enthusiastic consent sexy as hell. He is uncomfortable having sexytimes when he has Gawain’s strength at noon & midnight, so he has deftly avoided it thusfar. Dating Lark might change that, though, I’m thinking. He’s not dated within the Order before, after all. Pretty vanilla guy, all things considered, but that does not mean boring!

Identifies as: Gay

Mariah: at first I didn't think I had a handle on Mariah, but now I'm thinking she is either ace or just isn't in a place where sexuality is all that important in her life atm and she's fine with it. She's def down to be a soundboard for her friends though, and is wicked smart, so for these reasons she knows the most about what's going on with everyone else but is the soul of discretion.

There will be a part two because this hellsite gets buggier the longer my posts get, apparently.

Edit: part two ✨here✨

#legendborn #the legendborn cycle #bloodmarked #bree matthews #selwyn kane #nicholas davis #alice chen #mariah #headcanon

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kittyball23 · 1 year

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When do you think Viva will come into the story?

Good question @chipmunkfanno1love! I’ve been asking myself the same thing, and I’ve got a couple of scenarios for what could occur in the movie with her regarding her introduction.

Perhaps Viva is going to be introduced straightaway in a Prologue sequence

I’ve written two possibilities thusfar of Prologue sequences for this movie, one being BroZone performing, the other being Floyd’s capture by Velvet and Veneer. I began thinking of a third after learning that Viva is indeed Poppy’s sister. Perhaps a prologue sequence can showcase what happened to have caused the girls to become separated in the first place. Maybe Viva and their mother were taken by Bergens in the preceding Trollstice to the one that we see in the first movie, and their mother helped her escape before she could be eaten (I’m thinking something similar to Kung Fu Panda 2 where Po’s mother hid Po and sacrificed herself to the wolves so that they wouldn’t get him) Viva could have then had someone help her find some kind of way out of Bergen Town and then been raised elsewhere.

I also like that idea you had, where perhaps Velvet and Veneer are shown younger at a Trollstice and are given Viva as their Troll to eat. Then, after they like her singing and think she’s too cute of a Troll to eat, they will decide to keep her in secret (perhaps in a Mother Gothel-Rapunzel type of relationship). She is taken with them once they, presumably, leave Bergen Town where either a) She is still with them up to the point of the movie taking place or b) She at some point found out their true intentions for keeping her and then found a way to escape them

2. Viva may be found alongside one of the brothers

Perhaps, as Branch and Poppy go on their journey to find the brothers wherever they are at, in one of the locations where the missing brothers are at is also where Viva is. If it is Spruce or Clay, she could perhaps already know them or be one of their friends (possibly even girlfriend!) who will want to come along on the trip too. Or perhaps she is captured alongside Floyd. Maybe Velvet and Veneer have a plan to capture any Troll that they deem talented enough for whatever plan they have, and Viva is one of several prisoners that they already have held hostage.

3. Viva could be a helping hand that they pick up along the way

Maybe, as the group travels along, they’ll get lost or run into some kind of trouble that Viva will step in and help them with. She could then decide to join them on their journey and assist them.

Now, I’m not certain exactly how the whole sister reveal will happen. I don’t think Poppy knows that she has any siblings, but maybe Viva knows that she does. Or, both could not know, and there will be another way that they come to the realization. The best example I can think of at the top of my head is Pup Star 2: Better Together. In this movie, the main character Tiny and the other dog Scrappy have no knowledge that they are sisters until they realize that they have a faint memory of the lullaby that their mother used to sing for them when they were very young (as well as the fact that both dogs look very similar in appearance to each other).

Maybe not something exactly like this, but something similar I’m thinking. I also think that Branch will turn things around at Poppy and be like "Poppy, why didn't you tell me you had a secret sister?!" lol

But anyway, those are just my thoughts 😊

#trolls #trolls 3 #trolls band together #viva trolls #poppy trolls #branch trolls #brozone #john dory #spruce trolls #clay trolls #floyd trolls #velvet and veneer #dreamworks #thanks for the ask!#kittyball answers

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duskstar727 · 2 years

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Warriors: Missing Moments #1: Squirrelkit’s Mentor

The first in an intended series of missing moments meant to align with canon.

“Firestar wants to see you in his den.”

Dustpelt’s head shot up from the sparrow he’d been sharing with his mate. “Great StarClan, Brackenfur,” Dustpelt mewed, “you nearly scared me out of my pelt!”

Brackenfur blinked apologetically. For such a big cat, Brackenfur had an incredible lack of presence. He was a great Warrior, but he always seemed to blend into whatever crowd he was a part of. This wasn’t the first time he’d spooked Dustpelt.

“No matter,” Dustpelt rose to his paws, stretching languidly. His muscles ached from a long day of hunting and training. He’d taken his sons, Shrewpaw and Spiderpaw, out for an early hunt that morning. The hunting trip had been a good opportunity to spend some quality time with them, and to break the news that their mother, Ferncloud, was expecting another litter of kits. He’d been unsure how they’d take the news, with them both still being such young apprentices, but both toms had seemed nothing but excited at the prospect of new siblings on the way. Still, I’ll have to make a point to spend time with them after the new kits come, so that they don’t feel pushed aside.

When he’d returned from his hunt, he’d had barely a heartbeat to rest before Sandstorm had asked him to help her with Sorrelpaw’s battle training. The young she-cat had only just been cleared to resume her Warrior training after moons of recovering from an accident on the Thunderpath in the medicine den. While she’d been healing, her brothers, Sootfur and Rainwhisker, had completed their training and earned their Warrior names a half-moon ago. Dustpelt knew that Sorrelpaw and Sandstorm were both equally eager to make up for the time they’d lost, so he hadn’t been able to refuse. His muzzle still stung from the fierce blows Sorrelpaw had dealt him during their training session, and he knew she’d make a fine Warrior in no time. Yet, after such a long day, the last thing he wanted to do was go and speak with Firestar.

“Did Firestar tell you what he wants with me?” He asked.

Brackenfur shook his broad, golden head. “He didn’t say, but he was pretty insistent that you come now.”

Dustpelt stifled a groan. That didn’t sound promising. Dustpelt and Firestar had never been close—Dustpelt had spent many moons as an apprentice, and then as a young Warrior, teasing Firestar about his kittypet origins. He’d never imagined that the soft little kittypet that Bluestar had brought into camp at the height of Greenleaf would one day rise to the position of Clan leader. Firestar had been gracious enough thusfar not to treat Dustpelt differently than any of his other Clanmates, and Dustpelt respected and obeyed his Clan leader in turn, but he was still uneasy being alone with the bright ginger tom. If their positions had been reversed, Dustpelt had no doubt that he’d have made any cat that had teased him so ferociously check the elders’ pelts for ticks for moons. But perhaps that was why Firestar was Clan leader and Dustpelt wasn’t. Or perhaps today was the day that Firestar finally decided to pay him back for all the trouble he’d caused in his youth. Whatever the case, making Firestar wait for him wouldn’t improve the situation.

Dustpelt dipped his head to the young golden Warrior to show his thanks for carrying Firestar’s message, and turned to Ferncloud. “I’d better go see what this is about,” he murmured, gently touching noses with his mate.

Dustpelt made his way stiffly across the clearing to Firestar’s den under the Highrock. The walk seemed longer than usual this time, and with each step, Dustpelt felt his nervousness increasing. Stop that, he told himself crossly. Its just Firestar. He might not be my favorite cat, but he’s a fair leader. Dustpelt paused outside of the leader’s den, meowing a greeting. A returning meow sounded from within, granting him entry, and Dustpelt pushed his way through the lichen curtain into Firestar’s den. The Clan leader was sitting up in his nest, his fur well groomed and his tail wrapped around his paws. He looked every bit the composed leader that he tried to be, but the twitching tip of his tail gave away the fact that his thoughts were elsewhere.

“Brackenfur said you wanted to see me?” Dustpelt prompted, trying not to sound too curt.

“Ah, yes, Dustpelt!” Firestar blinked at him with wide green eyes. “I’ve been waiting for you.”

“What did you want to speak to me about? Is it because I didn’t ask your permission to take Shrewpaw and Spiderpaw out this morning? I can explain that; Ferncloud is expecting another litter and I wanted to tell them in private, so I—”

“Nothing like that,” Firestar cut him off with an amused purr, “and congratulations on your second litter. ThunderClan will welcome them warmly. I’ll see to it that Ferncloud is taken off patrols along the ShadowClan border.”

“Thank you, Firestar,” Dustpelt murmured, genuinely pleased by the thoughtful gesture.

“You know, I’ve decided its time my own daughters were apprenticed,” Firestar continued.

At last! Dustpelt couldn’t stop a small sigh of relief from escaping. Firestar’s daughters, Squirrelkit and Leafkit, were nearly seven moons old. Leafkit was mild, polite, and a pleasure to be around, but Squirrelkit, on the other paw, was a seemingly ceaseless ball of energy and trouble. Having a mentor to keep her in line would do her well. Two moons ago, she’d managed to sneak out of camp and had made it all the way to the stepping stones. She’d been halfway across when a RiverClan patrol had spotted her, and Leopardstar herself had carried the mischievous little furball back to ThunderClan camp. She’d firmly told Firestar to keep his cats off of RiverClan territory, but it had been impossible to miss the amused gleam in her amber eyes. Dustpelt had never seen Firestar so embarrassed or furious before, and as a result, Squirrelkit’s apprenticeship had been delayed by a moon. Leafkit, kind and wise beyond her years, had decided to wait with her sister to become an apprentice. Privately, Dustpelt was glad that Squirrelkit would be out of the nursery before his next litter with Ferncloud arrived. Squirrelkit didn’t mean any harm, but there was no way that she’d be capable of being gentle with a newborn litter.

A glance from Firestar told Dustpelt that his relief had not gone unnoticed. “She’s going to be a pawful,” Firestar admitted, “and Leafkit has asked to train as Cinderpelt’s apprentice, so she won’t have her sister there to keep her out of trouble.”

Dustpelt wasn’t surprised that Leafkit wanted to be a medicine cat. She’d been hanging around Cinderpelt’s den since she was old enough to leave the nursery. “Would you like me to ask Shrewpaw and Spiderpaw to keep an eye on Squirrelkit?” Dustpelt asked. Perhaps that was why Firestar had called him here.

“No,” Firestar blinked slowly. “I’d like to ask you to be her mentor.”

Dustpelt’s eyes stretched wide with shock. Whatever he’d been expecting from this conversation, this wasn’t it. Mentor to the Clan leader’s own kit? That was an incredibly high honor. “I—me?” Dustpelt stuttered in shock. “Firestar, I’m beyond honored, but why me?”

“Dustpelt, I know we’ve had our differences,” Firestar began, “and I know we’ve never been close. But you are a fine and loyal Warrior, a credit to our Clan, and a trusted ally. I want you to know that I bear you no ill will.”

“I can’t say I never wondered,” Dustpelt admitted, “but you could just tell me that. To ask me to mentor your own kit… that’s a far greater honor than I deserve. And what about Graystripe? I thought you would want him to mentor your daughter.” Mentorship of the Clan leader’s kits usually fell to the deputy, or if not him, the Clan leader’s close friends or senior-most Warriors. Dustpelt did not fit any of those categories.

Firestar winced. “Graystripe is… he’s my dearest friend, and a fine deputy. But he never was a very good mentor. I practically mentored Brackenfur for him the whole time he was meeting Silverstream. Things are different now, but any cat with eyes could see that Squirrelkit is going to be a challenge. I need a cat who I know will prioritize her training and be firm with her when necessary. A cat who will teach her how to respect and uphold the Warrior Code. I would trust Graystripe with my life, but he is not that cat. You are.”

“I am humbled by your faith in me, Firestar.” Dustpelt murmured, dipping his head low. “I know I’ve made mistakes, and I know that I was…unfair to you when we were young. But I swear by StarClan that I will be a good mentor to your daughter.”

“I know you will,” Firestar meowed, flicking his tail to show Dustpelt that he was dismissed. “I suggest you get as much rest as you can tonight. It may be your last peaceful night for quite some time. Squirrelkit is going to keep you on your toes.”

When Dustpelt pushed his way out of Firestar’s den, his head was lifted high, and the last touch of guilt that had plagued his heart for seasons now dissolved into mist under the light of the setting sun.

#Warriors #Warrior Cats #dustpelt #squirrelflight #Firestar #fanfic #warrior cats fanfic

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yiga-hellhole · 9 months

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ship opinion bingo with gan-based ships

rauru/gan

sonia/gan

zelda/gan

link/gan

bonus : kohga/gan and demise(or Ganondorf hw)/ghirahim

the whole shebang, huh? here we GOOOOO!!!!

RAURU/GANONDORF

AND WE HAVE A BINGO! so i haven't finished totk but bro. bro. holding your arch nemesis by the tits for 10.000 years. yeah something happened there. i adore a good divorce ship, and this is the one where the divorcees just keep coming back to each other because the homoeroticism is too on the nose. i see it. i see it. i see it.

SONIA/GANONDORF

again, haven't finished totk. i have only seen sonia in like two cutscenes thusfar. but i love it when women get to be pissed off at huge burly men and in doing so get to be recognized as a viable threat. so i will be rotating this one in my mind on the backburner until i'm more informed on their canon dynamic and each characters' backstories in the game

ZELDA/GANONDORF

this is one of those ships where i don't really care for it but some people do interesting stuff with it and i see what they're going for. the fun with zelda and ganondorf is that he doesn't necessarily want her, but wants everything that she has. this old man is so fucking jealous of someone half his age at minimum. so honestly the age difference is a bit too big and dynamic is a bit too antagonistic for me to actively like this ship. i guess i can see it playing out as a bodice-ripper type story, but that goes against nando's character to me, and i've never quite been fond of them in the first place. something like an arranged-marriage-turned-something-more or a hyrule warriors esque wartime romantic tension could work. they *are* entangled eternally in a cycle of being tied by soul, but fated to be enemies each time. at some point something could spark i guess. but at the end of the day its a solid "eh" from me

LINK/GANONDORF

the same kind of arguments as zelda/ganondorf, but instead of royal diplomacy, link has a sword. again there's gotta be something about being the one prpphesized to slay the same guy cycle after cycle. maybe in one of the cycles, he won't want to...? how scandalous. but generally, i don't care too much for this ship

BONUS ROUND!

KOHGA/GANONDORF

i love divorce and i love horny old men thirsting over big buff dudes. i have a feeling kohga has a thing for large and bulky men, for no reason at all, that's not at all present in the game. so, in botw i see ganon's worship as a purely "riding-on-the-coattails-of" thing where kohga doesn't actually care much about ganon, he just wants a reason to make his personality cult and have an ez way to overthrow the monarchy. when that fails, he ditches the joint. but then ganondorf awakens into this absolute handsome beefcake and the illustrious master kohga would probably be like. "okay. hold on. Pause." and the rest is history. i see it. i havs the vision.

GHIRADEMI/GANGHIRA

this has already been answered in the ghirademi bingo. but if you go for ganghira, there's the added tension of "you remind me of the man i devoted myself to, and his presence lingers within you", which would definitely have some serious emotional weight to ghirahim. but that i don't see reciprocated, once again, given that ganondorf always pursues power first. and this time there's not even the shared bond that ghirademi has, where ghirahim served as his sword for centuries! they basically just met, and all ganon knows is this sword freak is devoted to him! oh ghirahim, stop going after men who terrify you!!

#madman's rambling #asked and answered #beeptic #as you can see i can generally see the appeal in every ship and i barely ever have hard no's #but triforce shipping typically doesnt do it for me!!#just a bit too much for me!! some people do it well and others do it awfully. and me i dont do it at all :3

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o-wyrmlight · 1 year

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Go ahead I want to hear it

Okay so like. Putting this under a Read More because Spoilers or whatever for Tears of the Kingdom, involving story spoilers and progression spoilers.

I am. Also going to go into a bit of detail about the journey thusfar, so. More spoilers in that regard.

So to start off with, the first story progression tidbit I did was with the Rito--because that's what the game strongly implied I should do. I met my nephew, Tulin, helped the Rito with their business, and proceeded to fuck off to do other things, including:

Ride on the dragon Naydra for literally 24 in-game hours

Explore the depths and fight the Yiga Clan and Kohga before realizing I have literally nothing to worry about and deciding to let him do whatever in Lanyru Mine

Kakariko Village, where I try to figure out how to see the last tablet for the ring ruins before eventually giving up on it

Finishing Lookout Landing's Depths missions, which let Robbie go back to Hateno Village

Explore the Depths for. Fucking ever, man. I was down there for a while.

Little side quests here and there.

So then I reach Hateno, and I talk to Robbie, who activates my shrine locator. He informs me of some other aspects of the tablet, but the one I actually need to work on is the Travel Medallion--because I'm cool and hip like that and good at taking pictures of random things.

And I think to myself, after running around and doing some other things--I.E. the school missions up to the second one--I think, 'Oh! The school needs monster extract, which they said is in Tarrey Town. I can go to Tarrey Town on the way to get the Travel Medallion and maybe hit up Death Mountain to get started on that quest.' Because the game nodded toward that as being the intended path.

So I go onto my map, and I mark down where I think Tarrey Town is. And I start heading north--climbing mountains and trying to find shrines and the like. And eventually, as I'm going along at the top of a hilly mountainous ridge, I come across something I. Hadn't seen before.

It looks like gloom, but thicker. It's a different color. It makes disgusting... gross sounds. And I'm just standing there for a minute, wondering, 'What the fuck is that? Is that some sort of bog? If I step into this fairly large blemish, will I sink or get hurt?' Tentatively, I step into it, step out--step in, and I don't sink. But I move so... so slow.

And I think, 'Oh, this is new. I wonder if there's a new mini boss like the Talus around that uses this... mud. This slimy stuff.' So I'm looking around for that as I continue toward my destination, and I come across more puddles of this gross sludge stuff. Until, eventually, I find my way shambling over the hill, and I see something that I don't comprehend at first.

It takes me a while to recognize it. Something blue like a line with brown stuff on the other side, like it's holding it back. Eventually, it clicks in my brain that this is a dam. Eventually, it clicks in my brain that the brown stuff is water.

Very quickly, I realize where I am, and I'm. Honestly kind of horrified.

Somehow, I've found myself in Zora's Domain instead. Because instead of pinning Tarrey Town on the map, I pinned the main hub for the Zoras instead.

And then there is stuff falling from the sky--globs of it, steady streams trickling from above way off in the distance. At first I assumed it was some weird waterfall, but it turns out, it wasn't. It was sludge. Pollution. This water is polluted.

And I'll be honest. Mipha's storyline is my favorite in Breath of the Wild. So it felt like a duty and an obligation to see this taken care of.

So I meet with Sidon. I roll up my sleeves. I get to work.

And that's what I did last night. I got to work.

(As a side note, I was legit SO angry and upset when I saw they took down Mipha's statue from the Zora's Domain square until I found her in Mipha Court. Of course I paid my respects to her--a moment of silence for one of the best arcs in BotW.)

#tears of the kingdom #totk #totk spoilers #tears of the kingdom spoilers #and i finished #and everyone clapped #(no no really everyone clapped)

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benchowmein · 1 year

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Haven't gotten to Gerudo Town yet but thusfar Rito Village takes the absolute cake for best main quest: the markéd difference the village has undergone, arriving to find it buried by snow, the impeccable level design that leads from playfully jumping on ice, using it to solve puzzles, and finally beating the boss with the exact same mechanic...the music was sublime, the path to the dungeon felt truly threatening, I was so hyped seeing that cooking pot knowing I was heading into a place of peril and that this was the game telling me to prepare accordingly, that moment where you rise above the storm to see the peaceful sky and dive into the eye of the hurricane, impeccable transformation of Rito Village back to where we know and love, kids growing up too fast, Tulin being commended by Teba in a way that felt so meaningful.

Comparatively Yunobo is so boring the only thing I legitimately enjoyed about Goron City was seeing him angry and mob bossesque, I am glad they made new roads into it to make the journey feel fresh and that they made it more hospitable - I'll obviously be returning to do the side quests but honestly I didn't see a huge difference to the area before and after the dungeon given that somehow Ganondorf's master plan for the area seems to be just...making Gorons lose ambition and become hedonists (?) rather than using the lava to his advantage. I feel like a better version of the dungeon boss would be to incorporate minecarts, which comprise the entire 'level' from entering Goron City to ascending Death Mountain to the dungeon itself. Bosses like that are mainstay of the franchise, often being a "ride the minecart and shoot arrows at the weak spot" - it would have been fun to have seen that come back only with Yunobo's special power used to knock off thick rock armour or something. At LEAST the arena should have had several levels to make use of Ascend, with ramps that fling off in different directions, forcing you to quickly aim Yunobo to crash into Gohma - instead I barely used his power and just used Recall on the falling rocks, then spammed arrows at his eye.

I wouldn't have gone for marbled rock roasts as the main threat to Goron City. Obviously the rocks are filled with gloom, so why not have the threat be that the mountain itself is being slowly gloomified? Falling gloom rocks and landslides would be much more of a threat to the Gorons, and they could even have retreated into caves - an opportunity to show off a cool underground cave system like the one in Ocarina of Time. I feel like Nintendo were really trying to move away from BOTW's Goron City, where lava and fire make the area awkward and visually disinteresting, but in doing so they replaced it with nothing except purple rocks that disintegrate after the quest.

Zora's Domain is in the middle so far: the difference to the setting is fun, and seeing the murky river and the mud is exciting knowing I can restore it. The music is great and very eerie - I barely spent enough time in Goron City to even hear it, but Zora's Domain and Mipha's Court have distinct themes that make sense. There was a great moment where on the path you find Sidon's monument swearing to devote his life to preserving the beauty of the domain, only to turn and find the path has been covered by fallen rocks and sludge and then to see the Domain partly covered in sludge as well - I wish they'd gone all-out and covered more of it or at least dulled the vibrant blue of the architecture, which looks a little awkward against the murky river. The Zora story leads around a couple of locations that aren't very easy to get to, with hopping back and forth to trigger "updates" from Sidon and Dorephan and so on. Not very fun, but the plight of the Zora feels very real and tangible with the infirmary and the side-quest to help a Zora who's been splunched by sludge. The path to the temple isn't great - I was anticipating a lot more falling sludge especially at that point where you're waterfall-hopping while ascending, which isn't challenging and feels so slow because of the low gravity. If there was sludge falling regularly there wouldn't be an issue of accidentally knocking the player all the way to the overworld, but I would prefer it if they'd made a mechanic where if you get hit by sludge while paragliding you continue to move but can't open or close your paraglider or change direction (encouraging you to aim straight for a waterfall, which would then wash you clean when you were submerged). I'm unconvinced by the idea that this is some ancient Zora spring that feeds Hyrule - shouldn't that be underground? Wouldn't an underground temple be better suited to this level? The waterworks section was fun, and I wish there was more to it than breaking a couple boulders!

I presume Gerudo City will have a sand/spirit temple in the Depths, mostly because there have been two sky-temples and one depth-temple thusfar, so I can see why the Water Temple is in the sky. But We will see

#totk spoilers

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akapanuka · 27 days

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Man, really hoping one day Australia (and most parts of the world honestly) collectively realizes that the 9-5, 5 days a week work cycle just isn't it. Some people work MORE than that and have more responsibilities than me and honestly, idk how they do it!! Coming to the realization that a lot of my issues could be solved if I just...weren't stuck in this cycle anymore. I can take some days off but then what? The norm is always going to be to turn up for the 5 days and there's no escaping that. I'd love to do things like make comics or AMVs of my OCs but anytime I think of it I fall back to the thought that, 'oh, that's literally impossible for me now. There's no time for a project that large anymore' and it sucks!! I think the one out I'm working towards is growing my art business enough that I can switch to part-time but I still don't know if that's feasible. It's interesting how much I've changed since being unemployed. There's a lot of good but also a lot of new things I wasn't prepared for. Either way, I just have to keep going. This year has been REALLY tough thusfar but there will be an end to the madness somewhere, just have to keep going

💪

#rambles #capitalism sucks!!!#I want to draw furries kissing #that is the one and only thing I was born to do

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batteredwarriorstillstanding · 9 months

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I am an intuitive type...it's the way I am. By and large, I'm pleased about this. I can often make enormous decisions without putting forth anylarge amount of reflection and study...and be absolutely confident that I made the correct one, games like Chess...where it is nowhere near possible to consciously consider all of your playable, or even superficially reasonable moves are the domain of those wired in this fashion. I have innate knowledge concerning many problems that haven't yet arisen and how to deal with them....it's not especially rare to be classified as having an intuitive personality trait....roughly 30 percent of the population. There are some so strong in this action that they are designated Intuitors by the same folks who certify psychics, I think. I don't know if it is THAT strong, but is certainly reliable enough for me to often sit through long periods of impatient partners and friends, and ridicule from less friendly types, awaiting an event that I "knew" woukd transpire, but, weeks later, still hasn't. What gives me the stones to confidently tell all sudden naysayers to fuck themselves is not a confident nature or an enormous intellect...it's merely my having experienced similar feelings of similar strength in the past and knowing that the events associated with them will break in a certain direction every time.

But, first if all, I only was ever "told" or clued into the reality that she is dear to me, and I needed to do anything I could in order to facilitate her ultimate transformation....anyone here into butterflys? Profound metamorphosis affecting the homely little caterpillar on such a profound level that it emerges a beautiful (although kinda useless....just kidding.lol) butterfly 3 weeks hence...at least we hope for a butterfly....a moth is unbecoming of her. I was also given all of these suggestions early on to advance our acquaintancship....not as confident in this intuitive angle as later in life, and also fucking TERRIFIED of being simultaneously embarassed and verbally desecrated that I kept attempting to accomplish shit at a distance. It did not work. I think you are actually open to the possibility of us sharing an unexplained (thusfar) joint venture to tackle....but now it is her who insists on trying from a distance....which is disappointing, because Passive Aggressive people (not submissive. I didn't say that) are the worst. They suck. They are dishonest and can't be trusted...I was not really overcome by this a decade ago...I was just frightened. If you are at all unsure, talk to ne. In person. You will be glad you did...whatever r happens. Then I can stop doubting what is so obvious.

The "feeling" I received after meeting the woman I remained infatuated with gor eons afterward was unique in its type, but STRONGER (and more persistent, as it turns out) than any other. One of the potentially troubling aspects of this ending in a manner undesirable to me (and there are several) is that it serves as a huge loss for an inner belief system that has been with me for as long a I can remember. In addition, there were 2 periods of my life more difficult than this one (maybe only I ne, actually) it's probably not going feature many huge changes in my approach to things. Logically, it seems like a wrap...and not even I can ignore this forever.

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tetrisfinished · 11 months

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the most important lesson i've learnt thusfar in 2023 - or maybe perhaps in my whole life to date is...that it is crucial to allow yourself the grace to feel your feelings.

feel ALL of your feelings.

the good, the bad, the ugly. the happy, the sad, the angry. the pride, the rage, the petty....let yourself feel it all. we do this a lot - as adults and as humans...where we're faced with an emotion and because that emotion doesn't quite fit into the moment that we're in, we try and push it aside. and we try and make ourselves not feel and process that emotion. and we push ourselves to forget and be happy and move on with our lives.

well i've got news for you. that shit doesn't go away. your negative emotions (because of course, typically those are the ones that are shunned or ignored or pushed under many rugs) stew and fester just under the surface forever.

until one day you realize you're harbouring SO MUCH RESENTMENT as a direct cause of them!

as part of my current journey, there are certain decisions i've made in my married life. yasir and i are...well, we're not okay at best. i've more or less stopped communicating with him about much of anything and i've also stopped expecting change of him.

although that last part is not totally true. what started out as an effort to change myself to force yasir to bring about change in himself has turned into something totally different.

maybe the original intention of it was incorrect. but now i'm realizing the fault in my thinking. me, changing my actions to try and control the way someone else reacts to them is STILL ME trying to control things that WERE NEVER IN MY CONTROL TO BEGIN WITH.

of course, while we speak on the topic of control i'd be remiss not to mention that of course we as a human species don't actually have any control over anything. that control will of course always lie with Allah swt. but we do have free will (to the extent of our own situations) and we have the abilities to act on our free will.

but anyway. whatever little control we have of our own situation lies only in the control that we have over ourselves. i can never hope to control the next guy any more than they can hope to control me.

in any case, i've been harbouring a lot of resentment for yasir because i am constantly feeling like i've been hurt by him - he does not care, he does whatever he wants, he does not spend time with us (his wife and kid), he does not stand up for me. and while, yes, all of that on it's own is not great - the fact of the matter is that earlier this year i made the decision to stick this marriage through. and frankly...my decision has not changed. i'm in it now and for my own reasoning that i am actively choosing not to share, i will continue to be in it, unless of course things take a turn for the even worse. which frankly, at this point, very little change in the worse direction would make me change my mind (abuse obviously being the big main one).

but the thing that is (was) causing part of the resentment was always me thinking he doesn't do any of this crap for me - but i continually do it for him! i visit and see all of his family and speak to them despite being unhappy or dissatisfied with the ways in which they treat me. i give them a lot of respect despite feeling like it is often or sometimes not reciprocated. and frankly whatever other issues i have with them, i firmly believe i could overlook completely if i had the support of my spouse with me. but i don't feel that i do.

so that is partially the cause of a LOT of my stored up resentment.

but this eid, i decided i wouldn't be meeting or spending time with them (read: bari eid, 2023). and then, lo and behold, i actually had the balls to go through with my decision.

and you know what happened? that imaginary fear of being trapped into doing something i don't want to do - that fear that my world will implode the minute i actively do something that i 100% know for a fact will make folks upset with - THAT FEAR WAS NOT REALIZED.

i didn't go. the thing happened. yasir went. he took esa. and here i am alive and well enough to tell the tale. isn't that nuts!? forget all the petty reasoning in the world - i finally realized that actually no one is forcing me to be the way that i am. it's this innate thing. it's ME. not HIM. or THEM. or ANYONE ELSE.

yes. my innate thing was grounded in mutual respect and care for the folks that i was sharing it with - but the mutual part of it i never saw or experienced. so when i took one step to try and level the playing field - nothing happened except for that I WAS ABLE TO BREATHE A SINGLE SIGH OF RELIEF.

i did it. i can do it. i can actually act on the things that upset me. maybe i'll go to hell for it, but at this point there are many other reasons stacked against me for that anyway. but MAYBE...in my lifetime....i'll learn to respect the way i feel!

maybe, i'll become the parent who champions the way their kid feels. maybe i'll become the person who thinks about my feelings when they hit. who tries to get to the root of them. who actively tries to wade through them, allow myself time and grace, feel them, and then get PAST THEM.

and maybe...i'll be a better person for it.

i used to speak like this before too (or at least i'd like to think i did). but now...now i'm actually actioning it. now i'm truly understanding it. and omg guise do not bottle yourself up.

let yourself feel your anger. let yourself feel the hurt.

understand why it is you feel those ways. are you hurt because you feel like someone didn't do something you would have expected them to? did you ever communicate that feeling? work through your shit so you can come out the other end and close that fucking chapter in your life.

so here's to the remainder of 2023 - may i fucking grow through my feelings. may my hurt be healed. may i become stronger and more patient.

may i be the person i expect others to respect and may i FINALLY AND TRULY AND SINCERELY afford myself that same level of respect.

ameen sum ameen.

much love,

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cold-arrow · 11 months

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Doctor’s Notes, Book 6 part 18

| Lost and Found | Summary, Things of note since last entry:

An empty cavern. A need for rest. journey back. No drake nor beast. avoiding the undead. An undead found A rather lively acquaintance. A shot in the dark, a chance at retribution calling the airship. a bruised dragon. sight without light. swarming hordes below. A plan of attack.

| 1 / 4 | the cave is empty.

Zyra isn’t here. We… don’t know where she is. we need to rest. We’ve been traveling for hours. Through the night, and morning to get here. But… she isn’t here. Where is she. Is she alright? --

We discussed for a bit on what to do. Where to rest. Where to go from here. How we can find Zyra. Omrick wants to rest here, for now. But Lym doesn’t feel comfortable resting here. Where were sent, or directed by the Stalactite. On wild goose chase.

I’m pretty sure, certain at this point, that the answers of the stalactite were false. Lying. But, it still begs the question of where Zyra actually is. Whether she’s alright. If she managed to escape to Roc, and where she might have hid. Not much besides that, that we can focus on, or prioritize at the moment. Lym seems worried, and racked by guilt. Hopefully hearing from Zyra will atlesat ease some of her worries.

There weren’t really any good places along the way to camp. And it doesn’t seem like there are any decent places in this area besides this cave either. So we eventually decided to just rest here for now. to at least try and get some rest

| 2 / 4 |

Not sure what to do. There is no Zyra. And no Aldrin. We should probably head back to Loudwater. Lick our wounds. Try and prepare in some way. For some semblance of vengeance. Though… I don’t really like our odds. We were lucky the first time. Lucky in quite many ways before could even confront the Dodking. Next time I’m… not so sure.

Hopefully some rest did the others a bit of good. Didn’t sleep much. But still a night of rest gave me some of my energy back, and clarity. hopefully we can get back to Loudwater without running into too many undead.

Or giants. Or both.

Fortunately we managed to avoid and sneak past most of the undead thusfar. We’re a few days into our journey back, and still seem to be in the clear. I think zyra is alright. Lym managed to contact her at somepoint, confirming that she’s alright, and managed to escape the Roc. She at least seems a bit less worried now.

-- the following day, while following the road to Orlbar, we noticed a fire by the road. A campfire. And strange whistling. Or the sound of some sort of flute coming from the same direction. We hesitantly approached, wary of who or what they might be. Especially if they’ve travelled to this dangerous of an area.

But, it appeared to a cloaked figure. Their back turned to us. As it addressed us and invited us over to the fire. Their voice was… a bit strange, but seemed welcoming and friendly. And a rat could be seen sitting up it’s shoulder. With 3 or 4 more on the ground

We argued for a bit, on whether we should to take them up upon the offer, when they reminded us that they could still clearly hear us. So, we just approached. Lym being to first, while I hid behind her and Omrick.

Im not sure if I was so much as startled, as surprised. But the figure appeared to be an undead. Their skull peering out at us from beneath the hood of their cloak. Dressed in dark leathers. And… having at first glance, about 4 rats keeping him company.

They introduced themselves as Griff. An undead wandered, with a family of rats. A Large family of rats. Most of which, were hiding in his cloak or coat. But they seemed to be a rather intelligent, and very much sentient, undead. Pleasant and friendly in nature though. Who had travelled to this area, to help people in need. Considering how dangerous it has become here. Lym seemed surprised by the name. like she had heard it before. And after some back and forth, intruding ourselves, he seems be be acquainted with Dave.

Which on one hand does make sense I suppose, but is still surprising on the other. However, and better yet, he has seen Zyra. Has helped Zyra actually. Explaining to he’d treated some of her wounds, after she was attacked by a very large bird. And confirming that she’s alright. Which is quite the relief.

If what he’s saying is true, than… Than this encounter is quite fortuitous.

After talking a bit more, he seem willing to help with the Lich, and the undead plaguing this area. And might even have some scrolls or other magic at his disposal, to help us out with that.

I am curious as to what Gryff is capable of. Though the dozens of rats are a bit concerning. But I do wonder how proficient he is with the bow that he carries.

| 3 / 4 |

We’re planning on heading back to Deadstone cleft. Hopefully we can prepare enough this time even without heading back to Loudwater.

Lym has called the airship to pick us up. And has checked in again on Zyra to see how she’s doing. She says the she’s alright.

Zyra has asked us to wait for her though. For she is determined to help us. However… all of us are a bit worried at this point, for her well being. Hopefully she’ll manage a third time againts the Roc. But I worry that that might be asking too much of her. That she’s exerting herself too much. Lym doubly so I imagine. We considered simply going in by ourselves, under the cover of night. To keep her out of harms way.

But… it also feels unfair to make that decision for her. To not let her have a say it.

We’re still thinking about how we’re going approach this as well.

The airship has picked us fortunately. Though their welcome was about as warm as ever. Lym quickly left for her room below deck. Not wanting to deal with the masked crew, and her emotionless brother it seems. After a quick introduction, and explanation as to who and what Gryff was about. I decided to head down to my room as well. Hoping to do some preparations.

-- I was a bit worried that I didn’t have the resources, for another project at first. But after some calculations, and planning things out. And double checking my resources, and inventory. I might just have enough?

With one exception. That being most important component: The goggles… Might have to ask around with the crew. if they might maybe have a spare.

I’d seen the kobold twins walking around with a pair of them a couple of times. So I inquired with Ar-beka ( or was it Bar-Eka?) if they maybe had a spare set. She fortunately seemed willing to help. But also seemed a bit hesitant. Asking me to follow her to her room. She precured a set of goggles, and asked what I needed them for. After explaining that I needed them to make goggles that would allow me to see in the dark. She seemed rather curious, and asked if I could make a pair for her as well. Unfortunately I didn’t have the resources to do so. But if need be, I’d be happy to make them for her in the future. Or just return them to her once I was done with them.

She explained however, that they were a gift from Bar-Eka. And that should would like them back. Or at least trade for them. However upon hearing that, I couldn’t simply take them from her. The last thing I want to do, is take and possibly loose a present that was gifted to her by her twin.

I told her as well, that id be happy to return them to her once I was done. And that I would do so as soon as I returned. But… that was IF I came back. Since… I wasn’t really certain about that part.

Though she seemed quite willing to trade, I decided to perhaps just give up on the idea for now. Not wanting to accept, or take a present, from her twin from her. So I simply thanked her, and headed back up stairs.

On the way up, I did run into the other kobold twin though. And just as a shot in in the dark, I threw the question out there if he perhaps had a spare set of goggles. He said that he might have a pair, and similarly told me to follow him. To the same room. Where from a similar box, marked with “Ar-beka do not open” he procured a set of goggles. One of several.

For there were quite a few goggles inside it .

Ar-beka had a similar box as well, when I asked her. With the word Bar-eka, do not open. The goggles and some of her other belongings had been inside. And upon inquiring she’d told me the box was private. And neither would upon it, cause the box said so. And they were good readers. I seemed oddly sweet, and I didn’t think much of it at first. But It kinda makes sense now.

Bar-eka asked me not to tell their twin though. That it was secret. Assuming that she might have lost her goggles a few times, and that he’d just replaced them, I agreed. And after giving them my sincere gratitude, I took the goggles back to my room and began my work.

| 4 / 4 |

Finished the goggles*. Took us a couple days to get back to the river splitting, so fortunately had ample of time to focus and work.

The area below us teeming with undead though. There are… so many of them now. Swarming like insects, clambering over each other. Forming piles of undulating corpses almost as tall a giants.

I …. Am glad were travelling by airship. it seems the Dodkong has ordered even more undead to be raised as defence, or protection. I just hope we wont have to fight too many of them.

-- Still begs the question though, as to what our plan of attack is. What our strategy will be, to actually succeed or even survive this time.

* Treated and echanted the glasses of the goggles using the scroll of darkvsion. And managed to get the final reagents necessary by transmuting the Cragcat claws we found earlier. Allowing me the make the final things necessary to inscribe the goggles themselves.

They… did break at somepoint. But forntuatenly Bar-eka was able to provide me with another pair. And I didn’t loose any important progress since it was an easily replaceable piece, that hadn’t really been inscribed yet.

Hopefully ill be a bit less of burden, now that I can finally see in the dark. Though I am grateful for Lym guiding me through darkness of all the caves we’ve had to go to. It’s a lot loss difficult, and unnerving being able to see in the dark now.

Though, hopefully I wont spot anything in the dark duri

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hms-no-fun · 2 years

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is kanaya trans? if so... why didn't she speak up more at June's coming-out?

so, answering whether or not Kanaya's trans is a lot harder for me than you might think. especially if you haven't read the chapter 8 epilogue.

when i wrote gf1 the epilogues weren't out yet and i was still a baby in homestuck years. it took me a very long time to let it sink in that i actually can just make shit as flagrantly gay as i wanted, which i think has the knock-on effect of godfeels growing ever more deranged in its homosexuality in a way that neatly parallels the larger metanarrative theme of canon divergence as a diegetically observable phenomenon.

all of which is a long way of saying that when i wrote gf1 i thought everyone was cis. because i was boring. and while i wrote gf2 after the epilogues, i felt like it would be dishonest to write a sequel to gf1 that disregarded its unspoken but still ambiently psychically present (to me, as writer) status quo. there's also the fact that, in writing gf2 at all, i was laundering my own rather negative coming out experience through these characters. fictionalizing that experience required a brand of allyship typical to the cis. so it goes.

but you'll know that in the ch8 epilogue Roxy is revealed to have been transfem the whole time by way of voidy accidental omission. now, Roxy was transfem "the whole time" in the sense that i didn't think she was trans until literally the second i wrote VV suggesting otherwise. this is exactly the sort of writing practice that even i tend to caution against. and yet here, i think it works pretty well! i like the thorny questions it raises! i like interrogating this kind of soft retcon that doesn't necessarily invalidate previous parts of the story, and yet feels like it should be a copout. Roxy is uniquely suited to being the character in that position, and VV is uniquely situated to speak to the audience through speaking to Roxy and call attention to our own likely mixed feelings on the revelation that Roxy was trans "the whole time."

i hope it's not too arrogant to admit this is one of my favorite tricks i've ever pulled in a story that's already flush to the gills with em. it's the sort of thing you absolutely could not get away with in any other story, but here it doesn't just work, it actually teases out a HEFTY baker's dozen worth of themes that reflect backwards on the rest of godfeels in a pretty fucking profound way, if i do say so myself. but for as big as my head got over this one, i freely admit it's a trick that only works once. if i turned around and said that Kanaya was trans the whole time, that would feel cheap. it's one thing to call attention to the tenuous continual reality of fictional worlds, and another thing altogether to deliberately undermine any sense of a continual reality the reader might possess. when i announced that June was canonically plural, i did so having already decided on exactly how and why that was going to become a major part of the narrative. in quite a similar sense to this Roxy thing, i don't think i can ever pull that trick off again either. if i started going around making proclamations about whose thusfar unspoken identities are what, that would create the impression that these identities don't have any material social impacts. it actively goes against everything godfeels stands for to start extracanonically assigning pride flags from my seat as The Author, because this is a story where being gay matters, where being trans matters, where being plural matters. it's not some tertiary inconsequential homestuckian INTEREST, at least not in a status quo as predominately cishet as homestuck's (because, let's remember, it does take 2009 america as the root of its worldbuilding).

so that's a no, right? on the question you asked that never mentioned Roxy? about whether or not Kanaya is trans? well...

here's the thing. i don't know if Kanaya is trans. maybe she is, maybe she isn't. if it's relevant to the narrative then it'll come up in that narrative at the first convenient opportunity. whatever she is, though, she keeps it to herself.

what i do know for sure is that she loves Rose. and when June comes out, June screams and makes a mess of their living room with her wind powers and generally Causes A Scene. obviously i'm on June's side re: said scene, but the same wouldn't necessarily be true of Kanaya even if she were trans. because she loves Rose. and my read on Kanaya is that, beneath her cuttingly sarcastic exterior, she is probably the single most loyal character in all of homestuck. it's just that her loyalty is primarily filtered through romance. this isn't to say she can't admit when Rose is wrong, but she's not gonna do it in front of all their friends! Rose is intensely prideful and secretive, and Kanaya is basically the only person she trusts to spend all her time with. i mean they're married for christs sake. and June, when she comes out, is... uh. well,

this is the thing about June's coming out scene that i think gets lost for some folks. it's not pure transphobia at the heart of everyone's negative reactions. there's a bit of that, for sure! but what it really comes down to imo is uncertainty. this is very shortly after egg June had a Big Emotional Breakdown that almost resulted in her erasing herself from existence. despite her insistence otherwise, June has depression. and i think we all know someone in our lives who we dearly want to help and support in every way we can, but after a while it becomes really fucking hard to determine the difference between genuine growth and the opening salvo to the latest relapse. this does not mean it's correct to compare a friend coming out as trans to a friend buying an expensive car during a manic episode, but you can see the busted logic that got them there. what hurts about transphobic friends with "concerns" is that more often than not you have the exact same concerns. it's messy, you know? it's messy in real life and it's messy in the scene. when confronted with situations like this sometimes you just lock up, you don't know what to do or say, you don't know how to be a good friend, you don't know where support ends and enabling begins, you don't know who or what to believe...

so amid that quagmire, i think it makes sense that Kanaya would stay by Rose's side regardless of whether or not she is herself transgender. that's my opinion anyway

#godfeels #sarahposts

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blizabrth · 3 years

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wip junk

tag games, am i right!? i always lose track of these lol, oops haha. i was tagged by @sothischickshe to gesture vaguely about my wips. i have a lot more wishful wips than this, but these are the ones that i am either currently toying with and/or have Actual Substance thusfar:

A VERY ACTIVE IMAGINATION

i was originally dabbling with this as a longer-form fic, but when i had stepped back for a bit and returned to it, i realized what i had was best as separate vignettes, so i started posting these little fantasies recently under a series. also selfishly because i was overthinking too much and started to doubt what i was writing, so i really just wanted to post things and put them out there to be read. ANYWAY! the next installation i'm working on is 'the dealership', where beth fantasizes about all the dirty, dirty things she and rio could get up to within those glass walls... (what's that about throwing stones?) after that i have thoughts on creating vignettes focusing on The Loft and The Gun, and others, but those are the two subjects that are prominent in planning right now.

THE THORN

@sothischickshe sent in an intimacy prompt a million years ago for "kissing scars" and it's become a monster of a rio character study. the problem is, i'm not sure if i can pull it off? to me, rio is suuuuper emotional. and i know we like to talk about how repressed beth is but like damn look at rio lmao, king doesn't know how to communicate for shit either. as i've worked on this draft, a handful of ~flashbacks have happened too, which are daunting. i explore rio's self-confidence and try to break that down from his perspective; i also attempt to explain the very conservative wardrobe we've seen post-s2 finale. ultimately, it's a complicated wip that i've been toying with a lot. but i recently took a little break from looking at it and then came back last night to read what i had and liked it so! i guess that's promising. hopefully i can finish a first draft and move forward lol.

OUROBOROS (working title lol)

i wanted this to be a simple pwp featuring some in vino veritas... and i GUESS it still is, technically, because they still just go to town on each other but there's also a lot of other working parts that i'm trying to get right. i'm not sure when in the timeline this happens? probably somewhere in an ideal season 3 where the death divorce actually happens or something, idk. anyway, beth is at rio's bar and then she starts talking a lot and spills a lot of her guts and then they have very intense sex all night long lol. the 'ouroboros' working title is a reference to 69ing, it's not that deep i swear. they just want to devour each other.

MELT + A FIVOLOUS PURCHASE

i'm grouping these two together because i'm realizing they are inspired by the same thing: it's so fucking hot where i live right now and i want to take it out on brio. melt is pure pwp ice-play fic, i plucked it out of the ouroboros wip because it didn't exactly fit and well that's it. a fivolous purchase disregards the living room hot tub and turns it into beth buying an above-ground pool and then rio comes over to bother her take a dip. i'm trying to keep it light-hearted/funny while also still sexy. a particularly fun thing i'm playing with in these especially: TEMPERATURE. we've got ice vs intense summer sunshine heat. it's been fun to write the different sensory descriptions here.

BETH X PHOEBE 4X06 CANON DIVERGENCE

this one might actually end up a 2 or 3-part something. i've been working on it since the ep aired. i know beth x phoebe isn't a popular ship by any means so this is pure self-indulgence. i am hesitant to post though because i'd probably consider it a "DEAD DOVE: DO NOT EAT" fic and idk how to handle that??? idk. i don't care but i don't want people to judge me lmfao, so i may never post it. still, i degrade a cop in it so that's fun.

DREAM WIPS (things i have thought about a lot but haven't written much/anything for)

listed here are my working titles for these ideas. i will expand upon any of these if anyone is interested, just shoot me an ask! FOODIE AU / PIT STOP / THE SILENT TREATMENT / SOCCER MAMI / LINGERIE SHOPPING AVEC RUBY / TO CATCH A THIEF / BATHOME4 IS ONLINE / MANGOES ON THE BEACH PWP / FOUR TIMES BETH WAS PREGNANT AND ONE TIME SHE WASN'T

jfc i wish i could write as prolifically in my actual docs as i do when i just ramble about what i want to write...but anyway so these are my ideas. i'm tinkering a lot. i get in my head a lot and start feeling like my writing isn't good/no one wants this and talk myself out of it way too often, so i used this as an opportunity to try and take an objective look at what i'm writing and you know.... yeah! i like these ideas! a lot! i want to finish them and share them!

tagging for the rambles (but absolutely no pressure): @sothischickshe (tag back biotch), @inyoursheets, @daydreamstew, @foxmagpie, @pynkhues, @dragonturtle, and anyone else who thinks this is fun/will help them write!!! it's a fun exercise i promise! <3

#tag games #my fic

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ernmark · 4 years

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The Heart of it All (pt 1) Reaction

Spoilers under the cut

The episode begins with a sound like a mechanical heartbeat, like an EKG. I like that.

----

A year. A year timeskip since the last episode. Holy crap.

First of all, that’s a hell of a long engagement-- far longer than necessary, I think, and I think Vespa observed as much, too. Buddy’s putting off the big mission (and in turn, the wedding) because she’s scared of what comes next. I feel like she needs to have a conversation with Juno about that-- about running away from the things you want most because you’re scared, except she does it with more style.

I love the soft, gentle way Vespa talks to Buddy-- and the way she starts to babble when she gets excited-- and then when Buddy puts her off a little bit of that raw roughness creeps back in. I’d want to hug her if I didn’t think it would kill me.

Also, I love the montage of moments in between-- there’s plenty of room for fanfic in this year, no doubt about it. “Bad Cops 4: Guns Are Illegal, So They Use Swords Now”. Juno being pissy that they skipped his favorite in the series, the fact that Jet thinks car crashes are too violent but people getting murdered to death is totally hilarious. Rita calling Buddy “Mom”.

----

The moment in privacy with her and Jet was really telling-- and not just the evidence of just how much of her is robotic. This is a side of her we just don’t see elsewhere. She’s fronting, she’s evasive, she laughs nervously and without that controlled glamour she always has. She’s never this vulnerable around anyone else, even Vespa. (And you can bet Vespa can sense that there’s something Buddy’s hiding from her, and a secret layer of rawness that she isn’t allowed to touch, and you can hear how much that hurts her). And for all this closeness, Jet still catches her off guard-- and he’s been picking up perceptiveness from Juno, which I love.

----

“Damn. She’s a quick one, that Buddy Aurinko. Ever a thorn in my side.” It’s telling just how many times we’ve dealt with our POV characters speaking of past and future selves as different people. It’s very much A Thing, and I want to see it manifested physically by the finale, because I’m obvious like that.

-----

One of the things that makes me really frustrated with Buddy is that by trying to protect Vespa, she’s making her more nervous. Vespa’s not an idiot, she knows something’s wrong-- but without Buddy to help her understand it, Vespa’s stuck trying to guess randomly, and her mental illness is going to supply all sorts of worst case scenarios that Buddy wouldn’t dream of.

And Vespa? Vespa fell from a hundreds-story building and lived. Do you really think she managed that without some really intensive self-surgery? It’s not impossible that she has some bionics of her own. And even if she doesn’t, do you really think she’s never worked with machines and bionic parts before? And if she hasn’t, don’t you think she of all people-- the assassin, the thief, the master medic-- would be able to figure something out? Or find someone who could?

Buddy’s fear and pride are sabotaging her happiness. And that makes sense, because her pride is the first thing we knew about her. It’s one of her best features. Of course it would be her greatest flaw.

-----

I love that Buddy has to write out her speeches ahead of time, and critiques herself for repeating lines even when nobody else can hear them both.

(And immediately I wonder what she’d have to say about how much I repeat myself, and immediately I can think of her reply: “Nonsense, dear. If there’s no room to improve then you’re doomed to get worse or go stale. Make your mistakes so you can learn from them and then go make some new ones.”)

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I find it so interesting that Buddy is impeccably organized and Peter is just a big ol’ mess-- to the point where you literally can’t tell whether his room is booby trapped or just that sloppy (And even if he is Just That Sloppy, who the fuck keeps an unsheathed knife just lying there, in the open? Really, Peter.)

(Also, I think it is official that all their “poetry readings”, “therapy sessions” and “whatever” happen in Juno’s room, at least after the first couple of weeks. What the fuck.)

----

“Jet’s danger is nothing compared to what lies ahead”.

In typical tiered dungeon story style, we’ve eliminated Rita (at the door) and Jet (upon being shot).

That leaves theoretically three tasks for Vespa, Juno, and Peter.

These three characters specifically are each love interests in a major established, endgame couple, which would ordinarily be a quick way to suss out who’s in which role.

Also, there’s a weird triangle of protagonist/antagonist going on here. Because Juno’s thwarted Vespa to protect Peter, but Vespa’s major gripe is with Peter, not Juno. And Juno believes and trusts Vespa, despite their bickering. And as much as he loves and trusts Peter, he has on multiple times arrested, thwarted, and called him out.

It’s like this whole situation is designed to thwart trope-readers like me.

My guess is that Vespa is going to have the be left behind/turn back at the end of this episode, when Buddy tells her the truth about her heart. That’ll leave Juno and Peter alone in the next chamber, when Juno finally confronts Peter about what he’s figured out thusfar (as the POV character, of course).

Or Vespa runs back early to rescue Buddy from heart failure with Jet, gets furious with Buddy for keeping this Very Big Thing from her, and then goes back to Juno and Peter to finish the job in a seething (and possibly murderous) rage.

#the penumbra podcast #100

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paradife-loft · 3 years

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Hi! I absolutely love the meta about NMJ's Empathy memories being unreliable, and it's got me wondering about how his qi deviation and death actually went. Since LXC says he saw the qi deviation (and Fatal Journey says it was in public), what's your take on how JGY got NMJ into his secret room so he and Xue Yang could use the Tiger Seal (and eventually kill him)? Fatal Journey has the Nie sect holding a funeral for him, so presumably NHS had /soneone's/ body to bury, but then in The Untamed LXC later says something like he 'hasn't heard from' NMJ in years and had feared the worst, so things... don't seem to add up? What do you think?

Aaah, okay, so: first off, I’m incredibly sorry it’s taken me so long to answer this, and I nonetheless very much appreciate your interest in my opinions here <3 If you’re still hanging around/following me/reading my blog, anon, idk how obvious it’s been that I’ve… not been having the best few months brain-wise, but that’s basically all I can offer as an excuse for why this reply is coming so late. Thank you for your patience!

So, okay, I think I’m going to try and tackle this question from a couple different angles. First of all, I think it’s worth looking at the material provided in the contained story of the 50 episodes of The Untamed on its own, to see what that suggests, before bringing in outside or supplemental sources, which is what for this purpose I’d consider spin-off movies, details in other versions of the broader MDZS story material, etc. to be. Also, I want to note upfront that while I do tend to incorporate different details and versions of events from both CQL and MDZS into my personal headcanon, what I write in my fic, etc. because I think they tend to provide interesting possibilities, elaborations, and what-ifs for a broader composite MDZS-adaptation-universe – for the purposes of this post, I’m going to stick to material from The Untamed and Fatal Journey only. Mostly, my reason for that is that there’s a few logistically distinct details of how the qi deviation happens in MDZS compared to CQL – one being, it happens at Qinghe rather than Lanling – that I believe affect the timeline of what Jin Guangyao is doing with Nie Mingjue’s corpse in the first place.

Alright so, in The Untamed alone, the evidence such as we have includes: the Empathy sequence involving the qi deviation in episode 41, and Lan Xichen’s statement in episode 39 recounting that he saw it happen himself at Jinlintai, and that after hearing nothing from/about Nie Mingjue since, he’s been “mentally prepared” - presumably, for the news that he’s dead. What I’m inclined to take from those two pieces of information, is essentially a story like this: NMJ qi deviates, very publically, and at some point while this is happening, he makes a break for it and leaves Jinlintai, and whatever presumably messy trail he leaves in the process ends up going cold for anyone trying to follow, with no NMJ around to be seen. With various factors at Jinlintai invested in retrieving him for attempting to turn him into a controllable fierce corpse, it’s pretty easy to imagine that, besides whatever above-board search party tried to follow him, there would also have been another party closely watching his movements for an opportune moment to slip in and scoop him up to bring him back to the secret treasure room for fierce corpse experimentation – hence why the trail would’ve gone cold.

Now, the actual scene showing the qi deviation itself doesn’t include multiple elements I’m positing or including here – specifically, the presence of a bunch of third parties actually witnessing it, LXC included, and then also the idea that NMJ ever left that one landing at the top of the stairs during the qi deviation at all. But, since we see in other parts of the Empathy sequence that the events shown can be… a bit more impressionistic than accurate; and furthermore since it seems reasonable to posit that the memories of the time when he has a literal break with reality might be even less literally reliable than the rest of them – I think those aspects can be reasonably explained away as that scene portraying more of what the qi deviation felt like from the inside, than what an outside observer would’ve seen. Nie Mingjue’s focus is Jin Guangyao, so Jin Guangyao is all he sees – up until Nie Huaisang breaks through that monomaniacal focus and is seen, finally, as himself.

(If you particularly want to pull out some feelings, I might even suggest the idea that finally seeing a distraught NHS was the thing that pulled NMJ sufficiently out of his rage to be lucid enough to flee – and that he booked it in part because he was terrified and ashamed to possibly hurt his younger brother, whether physically or emotionally by letting him see NMJ in such an awful state.

So then, aside from that: the question of what we see in Fatal Journey. I’ve actually been trying to find an answer about what kinds of mourning customs would be followed or even possible if a family didn’t actually have their loved one’s body on hand to bury, but thusfar my internet searching hasn’t really gotten me any useful information one way or another – if anyone reading has an idea or some good sources to point me to, I’d love to hear them! Everything I’ve read so far seems to very tightly marry the performance of appropriate rites and the presence of a body together.

That said, looking back through the actual funeral scene in Fatal Journey, I also wasn’t able to notice the presence of a coffin anywhere in the set, either? We see a memorial tablet, set up in the front of the throne room at Qinghe, and what looks like a brief shot of some offerings, and NHS stoking the fire, but in the couple brief scenes of the inside of the hall, I don’t think there was a coffin set up there? (Or, for that matter, out in the courtyard which we get a longer look at, either.) Compared to what I at least assume is a coffin with Jin Zixuan’s body inside during the mourning scene in episode 32, I feel like it’s reasonable to guess that, even with Fatal Journey included, whatever mourning rites took place at Qinghe after NMJ’s death, they may simply have not involved a body or a burial at all.

- And actually, now that I’m thinking about it, taking Fatal Journey into consideration overall suggests that it might ultimately be the norm at Qinghe to hold mourning rites without a body present – because per the lore additions in the movie, the Nie sect leaders go down to die on their own at the bottom of the saber tomb, and it sure doesn’t look like anybody had been going down there to retrieve them once they did? So, I don’t know, maybe there’s some sort of symbolic burial of something associated with the sect leader as a Nie custom, to keep things looking a bit more normal and less “we build a tomb for these resentment-filled blade spirits that eat our sect leader’s sanity”, and that’s also what ended up being done for Nie Mingjue? But, yeah, there’s no real confirmation happening even in the movie that NHS was able to come back with a body to bury, so I don’t think that necessarily contradicts the idea that NMJ could have gone missing during his qi deviation and never been properly recovered for a 100% confirmed death.

(That said, I personally don’t tend to incorporate, oh, most of the specific events or points of lore from Fatal Journey into my own readings on various elements of the story? Like, quite frankly, I don’t really like the movie that much, and I think it opens up a lot more unnecessary character and worldbuilding questions without doing a good job of integrating them back into the rest of The Untamed’s continuity (er, such as it exists XD). So I don’t necessarily have an opinion on whether “the Nie sect generally doesn’t do bodily burials of is clan leaders” is an idea anyone should pick up for The Untamed canon; merely that if you do take the events of Fatal Journey as canon, it certainly seems like it could be a possibility.)

(And again, big, big big disclaimer here that, e.g. if holding any kind of mourning rites without a body present is actually super Not Done, then what I’m saying with this part might be totally moot, and then well…. who knows, there’s plenty of speculation that could be used to cover that gap up – maybe “they never found the body” wasn’t actually widespread knowledge, but rather just information LXC had special access to due to the relationships he had with the people involved? – and some set of people depending on your preferences conspired to get another body to stand in for NMJ’s to allow them to hold a funeral? ….Which honestly sounds incredibly sketchy to me on its own, but considering all the other professionally Yikes-style desecrations of bodies that happen in this story…. who knows? I’m really just tossing out ideas here at this point, not saying I necessarily endorse any of them outside of “I think this could potentially work in some way without being out of character for anybody”.)

Anyway… I hope that answers your question, anon, and is otherwise interesting for everyone else reading? Thank you for the ask, and apologies again for taking so long to respond! <3

#ask a James #meta #no good things for the poor sad cultivators #The Untamed #Nie Mingjue #rambling #op #Anonymous

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jjba-hell · 3 years

Text

Fate and Fortune

So this was sitting in my WIP folder forever and I was bouncing between self-insert and OC but I figured it was just too specific for self-insert... ✌︎('ω')✌︎

Part 1 of (?) and tagging some moots- @risottoneroo (I know you’ve been going through it recently, I hope this upcoming series can help distract you just a little bit- I know your writing always helps pick me up) @giogio-gucci-gangstar @rat-makes-stuff and @uttertrash (sorry =w= I get nervous tagging any moots)

Setting for this one is pre-Stardust Crusaders and the best dscription for this timeline is MY CANON NOW. This is a very short entry piece of how Vera (my OC) first met Muhammed Abdul. As the story progresses I’ll give more explanation and context to my OC but for now, all ya gots ta know is that it starts off in Egypt.

Content warning is pretty mild- maybe some mysticism if you’re not comfortable with that but nothing beyond that. (Ya’ll know you just gotta et me know if I miss something)

Also- my interpretation of the tarot crads is about like 20% more accurate than Araki’s- meaning its probably not completly right but it makes a bit more sense than canon.

1.4 K words

Life as an expat in a foreign country wasn’t easy to begin with. Vera grew up a bit isolated from the real world, safely hidden behind the tall walls that held her with the other expat children from expat homes. That was, until she decided to go to a neaarby local market- in search of some cooler casual fabrics, an alternative to the continuously wrong winter fabrics the expat camp gave them for ventures outside of the walls of the camp- even though it was much too luxurious to be called a camp.

The decision to desert the safety o fthe camp had been made on a whim, without much warning to her parents, as casual as if she were heading toward the expat gym.

In hindsight, so much could have gone wrong for a 16-year old foreign girl but the threat of danger was never something she had felt too greatly. She had always felt safe- in a way. It had felt like there was always this...presence around her when she felt any unease. Dangerous or nerve racking situations unfolded themselves as life usually does, but things had a tendency to go her way, danger seeming to veer out of her path. She chcuckled at the thought- how cocky she used to be. Her first few trips unaccompanied had only cemented her idea that she was untouchable.

One faithful day- a few months after continous visits to the market- among the many stalls, stood a tall dark skinned Egyptian man- looming over the wares of a vendor whom Vera had made good acquaintances with. “Ah Muhammed. This is that teenager I was telling you about, the foreigner.”

“Hello Hassan.” She smiled- trying to hint at greeting her first.

She turned to the man beside her, almost two heads taller than herself. Two markings moved down his handsome face, a playful smile on his face- slightly marred by his eyes that seemed to hide an impossible sadness behind the warm brown. “You must be Vera. Pleasant to make your acquaintance. I’m Muhammed Abdul.” He gave a courteous nod, hands folding into his somewhat overlflowing robe sleeves.

Hassan leaned in to chip into the conversation before you could answer. “Vera is a foreigner, doesn’t divulge what her parents do but they’re the first in a long time to walk out the camp unaccompanied.”

“Now Hassan, I’m not one of your wares, no need to advertise me like that.” She smiled at the wares dealer with just a glimmer of warning in her eyes.

Muhammed chuckled. “More importantly why would you want to?” He asked with feign suspision.

Hassan looked shocked, dramatically holding his hand over his chest. “Muhammed, was it not you telling me just a few moments ago that you needed a new assistant for your shop.”

Hassan then rounded on Vera. “And didn’t you say you’d like a part-time job for some extra coin.”

Muhammed threw his head back and gave a hearty laugh straight out of his chest. “Hassan, if I didn’t know any better I’d swear this was an elaborate scheme to get Vera to buy more of your wares.”

Hassan showed his open palms up beside his head in a sign of surrender. “Caught red-handed. Easier to persuade her to buy something when her wallet is full. But why don’t you just believe that it’s a kind gesture?”

Muhammed turned towards you, that same warm smile on his face. “If you’re willing, Vera, we can discuss these things in my shop if you like.”

In the back of her mind she was a bit apprehensive, she’d been taught to keep her guard up when out alone. But then again, she had some mace on her persons, just in case of an emergency. And that presence looming over her shoulder seemed to make itself a bit more known, bringing a comforting warmth to her shoulders. So ,impulsively, she had agreed. “I’d love to see what you have to offer.”

Vera and Muhammed bid Hassan a temporary goodbye, Hassan assuring her that he’d skin Muhammed alive if he laid a finger her. Somehow the image of Hassan attempting to skin this monstrosity of a man walking ahead of her -almost gliding through the streets to his shop- a bit comical but at least she could appreciated the gesture. Ducking under a stone arch and then curling up some stone steps the two of them stopped in front of an old wooden door- looking as if it came straight from the 14th century.

Muhammed unlocked the heavy black iron lock and pushed the door open to reveal a ceiling of stars, dangling charms and sigils. “Would I be stereotyping you if I assumed you were a mystic of some sort?”

Muhammed gave a warm chuckle.“Indeed I am. I am what you’d consider a fortune teller, and Hassan heard assistant, when in actuality I was looking for an apprentice.”

“Would you say there’s a difference?” She had chcukled as she entered deeper into the shop.

Muhammed kept the door open, stepping through behind her as her eyes travelled through all the trinkets, stones, and more.

“Unfortunately there is. If I overstep a boundary, you are more than welcome to leave but...may I ask. Have you ever felt...guarded? Or watched? As if nothing could go wrong and if it did, it would turn out your favor.”

For a moment she couldn’t help but smile to herself. “Sounds like some crazy luck.”

Muhammed laughed again. She spun around on her heel and saw a deck of cards in his hands, tapping the edges on the red clothed table. “It’s actually a phenomenon I study. It’s considered mysticism but...if you really want this job, I’d suggest you at least have some inkling of what that feeling is.”

Abdul’s eyes flashed dark as his gaze moved from Vera to just beside her head. She frowned in confusion, looking over her shoulder to see nothing but before she could ask, Muhammed immediately looked her head-on with a calm yet stern expression. The focus in his eyes back.

“I’ll be honest with you, Mr Abdul. I do possess that feeling. Although it wavers from time to time- probably makes me a little cocky but I’ve never faced a problem that didn’t solve itself.”

Muhammed smiled, straightened a bit and then seamlessly slid into the chair at the table.

“A tarot reading? Before we discuss money then?”

She had laughed but slid into the chair in front of him and watched Abdul’s skilled fingers shuffle the deck and spread it out before her. “Pick three.”

One. Two. Three.

He slid them back together and arranged the three chosen cards a specific way.

“The past. Judgement, reversed.”

“Care to explain?” Her gaze locked with his for a moment.

“Your past is a source of turmoil to you- a never ending fountain of self-doubt and self-flagellation.”

Vera shrugged, not reacting much to this. She wasn’t about to explain her whole life to him any time soon.

“The present. Death, upright. Big change is coming very soon. Be weary of the storm that lies before you.”

You nodded, a slow fear creeping up your spine. Even Abdul seemed to swallow a bit harder at the prospect, as if avoiding her gaze.

“And future. Wheel of fortune, upright. You are the guardian of your own fate- even through the ever-changing storm of fates.”

She nodded, feeling more at ease with the last prediction. “Is it normal to feel such a variety of emotions after a read?”

Muhammed only smiled as he folded his arms before him. “It is. However no one likes pulling the death card. But that beside the point. How does 300 a week sound to you?”

“Generous.”

“Oh it‘ll only seem that way at the start. Later you’ll cuss me out for paying you so little. For now, I think it best I show you the ropes first.”

There a was a beat of silence, before Muhammed gracefully brought his hand out to shake. “Do we have a deal?”

Vera hesitated a moment before trusting in her own character judgement and shaking his hand to seal the deal. Abdul’s warmth as well as what she had seen from his character thusfar had her feeling as though she could trust him. But she’d be lying if that was the only reason- that unshakable good luck she’d been carrying on her shoulders her whole life seemed to assure her that if a problem ever did arise- she’d still be in control of her own fate.

It was, however, not Abdul whomst she had to worry about...

For not a month into her apprenticeship- Death has already sunken its claws into her life, and a violent change would alter the course of her life forever.

#jojo kimyou na bouken #jojos bizarre adventure #jojo part 3 #muhammed abdul #oc content #my writing #stardust crusaders #Fate and Fortune

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