#which is stressful to me

[the-irrelevant-trumpeter]

tumblr is the ideal social media for me because i’m truly just yelling into a void, which means i don’t have to be as worried about what people think. i’m not a part of actual conversations, i’m not (most of the time) creating content to be shared. it’s just me living in my own little world, which is exactly what i need.

#bc like i was thinking about how i’m very different on tumblr compared to discord #and i think it’s because on discord if i message something #it’s kind of… a contribution to a conversation #which is stressful to me #and i don’t really use insta much because when you post stuff #it has much more of a ‘content you’re trying to share’ vibe #which makes me self-conscious of posting #on tumblr? it’s primarily me just typing out my thoughts and sending them into nothingness #occasionally i have some select people reblog or like them #but overall it’s just me chilling #so there’s not that pressure like on others that i actually have to be a part of something or make anything important #and like. i do contribute to conversations on here! #but it’s usually just reblogging someone else’s stuff and rambling in the tags #which in itself is also just. rambling into the void. #idk how to articulate it better but yeah #so anyway if people who know me on both tumblr and discord were wondering why i almost never speak on discord #while i’m rambling on here #it’s because i don’t know how to take part in conversations

[nextstopparis]

when in fics they say two characters gave each other a look this is always what i envision in my head

#which is actually hilarious for certain circumstances #deeply stressful in others #ignore me

[july-19th-club]

seriously have been thinking about this all night long. call me autistic but the fact that 90% of workplaces the point is not to get your work done and then be done doing it but to instead perform an elaborate social dance in which you find something to do even when you're done doing everything you need to do in order to show your fellow workers that you, too, are Working . because you are at Work . disgusting why cant we all agree that if there is no work immediately to be done. we just dont do anything

#i personally like to not be doing things constantly at all times. it stresses me out #i know there are ppl who thrive on cosntant activity #but me i like to chill out. #and the problem then becomes that i only ACTIVELY remember to do work and Find More Work To Do when im stressed #at the thought that others might want to see me working #if im ever relaxed i just dont look for stuff to do #catch 22 of modern work culture which permeates even ostensibly noncapitalist structures like public libraries #for instance: will it really kill anybody if the books get shelved by me now after a very busy day? #or shelved tomorrow morning by. well probably me since i'll be the one at the desk #not in the slightest #but it was work that wasnt being immediately done by me. therefore it was incorrect behavior #that i failed to identify because my instinct is to relax when not immediately presented with a Situation #this got me labeled as 'having no initiative' by my dad from a very early age #and even as an adult i still feel like im a child with no initiative

[stuckinapril]

friend wanted to see my tumblr, and when i told him i can’t show it to him bc it’s basically my personal diary he went “oh so I can’t see it but a bunch of strangers on tumblr can??” he literally does not get me. no one will get me like the people in my phone get me

#It’s just so different #even though it’s public it still feels secret and safe. i feel comfy sharing a lot more on here than I do in my actual day to day life lol #in my head I’m also just speaking to myself 90% of the time which helps #if a friend off tumblr saw my thoughts I’d feel so weird ab it #esp bc they might get the vagueposting about certain situations and tell mutual friends #no thank u. this is for me. I’m not about to start censoring my thoughts bc someone I know knows my tumblr #u guys literally saw me have LIVE BREAKDOWNS #meanwhile I’ll have the worst fucking day in history and tell no one about it. I’m already cripplingly private but way more so in real life #this is basically a low stress journaling outlet for me. it’s so important for me to maintain the separation #like this is actually my diary & has been so handy for letting out emotions / articulating thoughts / staying on track !! #& I’ve met so many kind people on here who actually get me. which is so hard to find irl bc I’m surrounded by pre-med gunners/overachievers #who are by standard not very good w emotion & can be competitive/judgmental. or at least it’s hard for me to be vulnerable in front of them #and I’m part of that crowd so I reserve my emotions only to a handful of very close friends #it’s nice to hop on here and express negative emotions!! or positive emotions!! just whatever I want and it’s low stress and people get me #I don’t have to worry about judgment or competitiveness etc etc #like everyone on here is so kind & nice & understanding. & just a breath of fresh air from the types I run w. it’s just nice to have this #so idk that’s why I think I’ll always be strict about keeping the worlds separate. it just works #p

[i-am-a-fish]

this year I will become a powerful lesbian

#by the way this post is honestly kinda stressing me out because I'm trans and not everyone thinks m->f trans people can be lesbians so I'm #kinda nervous I may attract some hate from this which really sucks

[canisalbus]

Real fan art is coming one day, but for now I really wanted to see if it was feasible to simplify their gradients into something that would fit a simple style like Bluey’s 😅

.

#aaaaaaaaaAAA #they're so precious I can't ;m; #I still haven't watched Bluey so I can't really comment on show accuracy but to me these look spot on #if you ask me the gradients work really well #if you look at them and unfocus your eyes they look like their normal markings #Vasco might benefit from having one more band between the base yellow and the lighter brown but that's totally optional and might take away #from the simplicity of his design #their colors are so true to the way I color them which is both cool and kind of uncanny #like Machete's pink details which in reality are very peachy almost closer to light orange than true pink #and their colored linearts which use the same colors I use for my colored linearts #I don't know I thought that was really cool attention to detail #they're adorable #thank you! #gift art #apupcalyptic #own characters #Machete #Vasco #their lives would be a lot less stressful in bluey universe I reckon

[shadowednavi]

it's been awhile since I've worked on this project! I've had this verse finished for months but didn't want to post it on its own, and instead wait until the whole thing is strung together to show the final result all at once. But I'm tired of holding onto it, so here is one section of my deltarune animation! My art tag has other clips if anyone is interested in seeing more~

(song: "The Hymn of Axciom" by Vienna Teng)

#deltarune #deltarune animation #deltarune spoilers #deltarune chapter 2 #noelle holiday #queen deltarune #kris deltarune #kris dreemurr #susie deltarune #ralsei #berdly #vienna teng #confession time the only reason I haven't been working on this is because I started playing minecraft #and anytime I open my computer it's minecraft time #I did also get a new computer in August which was a pain in the ass to set up #but I managed to get all my clip studio settings transferred over from my old battlestation #this has also been a weird transition year so once I'm fully established in my new place I'll be less stressed #didn't even realize how stressed it's made me #just one more week #oh god it's my art

[harriertail]

false prophets

#lionblaze letting sol go from thunderclans prison is an insane character moment to me #he sees the chaos in TC caused by this outsider and the stress it causes his siblings and lets him go #warrior cats #lionblaze #sol wc #character design #they are also both described as lions which is like. insane to me

[stankworth]

after many years of being strong // may you have the chance to be gentle again

#simon blackquill #aura blackquill #athena cykes #ace attorney #more fanfi c deleted scenes :V this is how i deal w being stressed #i hope its clear theyre getting simons stuff from auras storage unit and putting aura's stuff in while shes in priso n #this sequence is also many headcannons deep. mainly that he was into birds before samurai stuff and also is autisti c #there's scholarship abt the correlation btwn being aut istic and tra ns. not that simon is but he mightve been Bad At Gende r in other ways #as in Let Me Bring My Soft Pink Thing To School. which might lead you to seek out more mas c interests at some point #like strong muscuIar men fighting each other with swords. A very manIy interest for someone whos 1000% straigh t of course #Also if you consider the timing and Auras whole Vibe I think you will agree she was a scene queen #my art

[littlebitofdnd]

Sandra-Lynn and Sklonda are having a "What Do We Do About Kristen" phone call as we speak

#dimension 20 #dimension 20 spoilers #brennan lee mulligan #fantasy high #fantasy high junior year #d20 fantasy high #dimension 20 fhjy #d20 fhjy #fhjy spoilers #fhjy #sklonda gukgak #sandra lynn faeth #riz gukgak #fig faeth #kristen applebees #like kristen IS a good friend and she DOES appreciate riz and fig but she is a mess #like as mothers of two deeply troubled children it makes sense they're comcerned #if my daughter the self-sacrificing ticking time bomb said she was ignoring a CURSE because she was busy with her friend's campaign??? #or if my son needed me to pull over to take a nap because the SAME GIRL was stressing him out so much?? #i think because we live outside the universe and love kristen it's easy to forget #kristen went from being the 'good kid' that the bad kids corrupted to the bad influence that worries their mothers #thinking about ally saying that kristen this season is when chaos is no longer cute #speaking of which this scene did make me realize how little the Thistlesprings check up on gorgug #ik they're trying though so imma give them a pass #like kristen has NO proper guidance on how to enter adulthood #i GUESS jawbone but Jawbone isn't raising her so much as he is housing her #What Kristen REALLY needs is to have one singular adult want to be her parent #She doesn't HAVE a proper sandra lynn or sklonda checking in on her #she has her ex-girlfriend's uncle #if kristen had someone looking out for her we wouldn't BE in this situation

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

*tries to organize my thoughts*

*remembers i'm not in school and therefore beholden to neither heaven nor hell nor any man's grading system*

*joyously shredding & tossing all my carefully arranged 3x5 mental notecards into the air like so much beige confetti. raising my arms in victory, cheering raucously until i accidentally inhale bits of homemade confetti*

(*coughing up itty bits of paper like a cat evicting a hairball with a firm understanding of tenants' rights*) wait wat happens next

#i marie kondoed my thoughts and *i* feel great. but now my stream-of-consciousness has escaped containment #so many innocent bystanders at stake #every time i try to organize my thoughts i run out of plastic bins and have to make a trip to the container store where i get even more dis #racted so. you can't just hand me THIS brain and NO catalogue OR library classification system #and expect me to single-handedly sort through all this nonsense? bad form but fucking form not in my job description #aNYways. formal education sure did a FUCKING NUMBER on us huh #(a number i measure not in gpa or dollars of student debt. #but in the number of therapy sessions & medical debt it will take to recover.) #seriously folks. our education systems are...innately traumatizing for a huge number of students. and we NEED to address this. #the fact that it is culturally common for adults to have anxiety nightmares about school/exams...even decades later? #that is not cute. it is Alarming. #no one--much less entire generations--should be spending their developmental years in an environment of chronic stress & pressure & strain #and yet that is the reality for millions and millions of pre-teen and teenage and young adult students #this isn't healthy and it serves and empowers NO ONE #...except of course the many exploitative educational & financial & debt-collecting institutions thriving from the current balance of power #and of course it's a nefarious and powerful way to sabotage/erase the middle class #which billionaires and the wealth-inequality creators they finance couldn't possibly have any noteworthy interest in whatsoever #it's not like there's an elite group of people with huge financial incentives to drain/steal resources from the masses... #anyways sorry for going all Conspiracy Theory on you. #obviously the billionaires who control the vast majority of our resources and news and political campaign funding #are not tied to every single itty bitty social issue and i'm a silly billy to imply it #please tell elon musk to ignore this tweet i am so subservient and acquiescent #mr musky u r so good at inheriting slavery-built mining fortunes & buying other people's companies #& building rocket ships & fancy cars that do NOT explode/catch fire & also NOT running billion dollar companies into the ground #mr musky u r so talented genius billionaire playboy with 10 kids and ex-wives who find you creepy af babe u r basically iron man

[keymintt]

cycles, and the wheels that turn them

#art #fanart #disco elysium #harry du bois #kim kitsuragi #kimharry #harrykim #idr which is the technical ship name #my art #digital #comic #comics #disco elysium fanart #harry disco elysium #kim disco elysium #anyways shoutout to disco elysium giving me brainworms and also an idea to make a comic again. it has been Too Long since i've finished one #also i know this is super short but i like. hope the characterization is alright? i'm probably stressing too much over how plausible it #would eb for kim to buy harry a sandwhich but. such is the way i am hklghdflk #if you saw the version with the typo no you fucking didn't #greatest hits

[fancyfade]

characters taking a break from their mental-breakdown arcs in their solo titles to show up in crossover events is always big 'ok you're sick but who's gonna cover your shift?' energy :P

#superman about to self imposed exile from earth but showing up in invasion #dick in war games #which like! makes sense b/c a wholescale alien invasion thing where many people are dying is a case of all hands on deck #but damn XD #dc comics #crossover events #war games #invasion #superman #edit: and suicide squad 23 showing up in invasion is reminding me waller is also having her own guilt/stress induced hallucinations #worst time for everyone truly in invasion

[clownsuu]

Small detour of what I usually post, but I absolutely wish (other) clown the best of luck during these confusing and almost hopeless times- nobody knows how to deal with such amount of attention in such short amount of time- a blessing and a curse to behold

#Seeing their posts absolutely shattered me #I may never be able to relate to how he’s going through rn but at least I can relate to the fear of living in absolute fear #the fear of unable to be yourself in your own home with creative and personal freedom #The fear of being terrified that the thing that gives you the most innocent happiness will be heavily demonized and threatened #The fear of getting caught doing something you love and being yourself with your found identity #The fear of destruction #I relate heavily to this and to feel you are going to be caught doing anything that isn’t a crime hurts #I wish him safety and love during these stressful days #He’s brought so much joy to my life that I must keep private irl too #Whatever he decides for the fandom I will fully support it #I will still continue posting of course unless he wishes otherwise #If he sees this (which I doubt) hey other clown lmao- you are loved and not alone #It may be scary but you are not alone- you will never be alone #There will always be people out there who love you and there will always be those who are not even worth giving time of day #The internet is both a blessing and a cruel cruel unforgiving place #I hope it doesn’t deter you from doing what you love and hold dear #I hope you have anyone you can be with online or in irl that can give you the comfort you need #You deserve peace and security #Do what you feel is best #Welcome home

[redhotarsenic]

@nowfallc PICTURE!! FOR YOU!! PLEASE TAKE IT!! <3

#agh I’m so so nervous but I’m big and strong and you all agree with me <3 #plus it’s nearly 6 in the morning and I pulled an all nighter to finish this. which I’m sure is not helping my stress levels At All! #ALSO! #I’m gonna do another one! #you will NEVER know which picture so get fuckin ready HELLLLLLLLL yeah!!! #<- as for those of you who were Present when I said which picture I was gonna do. ummmmm. shut up! say nothing!! #ALSO…..2!! #wanted to share how I did the scuff marks cuz I felt like it. and also I said I was gonna do it. anyway! #what you wanna do is get a real textured brush. ideally something pencil adjacent #and a mid grey color #and with LIGHT pressure you follow the edges of whatever metal bit you’re rendering #you can go a little heavier on the corners if you desire #from the corners you take a smudge tool and gently blend in the opposite direction of the corner if that makes sense #and then take an eraser (IDEALLY one that’s the same as your rendering brush) #and gently erase back towards the corner. but with a much smaller brush size #add little scratches and pick marks as you please #and that’s it #you know maybe this would make more sense with an actual diagram I’m so so bad at explaining stuff agh #I’m gonna shut the hell up now 🙏 #trigun #nicholas d. wolfwood #trigun stampede #trigun fanart

[darkxsoulzyx]

do you guys ever get too scared to post ocs because you’re worried that their design or story isn’t cool enough

And then someone posts their OC/sona that looks super similar to your OC, even though you’ve technically made yours first

And now you’re scared of posting them because you’re afraid someone is gonna try and compare the two, because someone will always do that if they look similar enough

Do you guys ever feel that way or am I just really really stupid

#darkzyx #clink #minor vent #little bit of a rant I suppose #I don’t know I dont wanna look like a copy cat but at the same time my guy has been around since 2017 #I have the watt pad art to prove it 💀💀💀 #but at the same time #no one knows who he is because I just never had the confidence to consistently tell/post about my ocs and their world #mainly because I kept changing their stories all the time… #💀💀💀💀 #like I can’t stress enough just how similar their concepts are to the other persons #which is an extremely big shame because I really really like my OC #but I also love their concept #but if someone accuses me of being a copycat #I think I’ll crumble away into a pile of ash 💀💀💀