#which is also great for my autism

[asteria-argo]

Good news: todays day at work is making me want to die way less than my last shift.

#they printed a physical list of tasks that I can now follow instead of wandering aimlessly or bothering my managers #which is great for my autism #and everything was easy to find in the back for once #which is also great for my autism #and a nice lady said my hair is pretty

[quatregats]

I think that it would be very fun to stick Horatio Hornblower, Shuos Jedao, and Baru Cormorant in board game club together

#(also my beloved mats belongs in this category of character but since he is an oc i will refrain from putting him in the main post) #anyways. welcome to The World's Most Unnecessarily Intense And Extra Boardgame Club #jedao would be the only one actually acting like he was having a good time and also i think he would deeply annoy hornblower #which honestly hornblower is just bait for annoying people and they're both their most fun at their pettiest so i support this #hornblower and baru would have an interesting relationship. not quite sure how that would go #i think they would either hit it off because Autism reasons or they would deeply dislike each other #either way i think this would be a great social experiment and absolutely hilarious #not tagging sorry i don't feel like letting this show up in the main tag #perce rambles

[doodlboy]

Hey question 4 autistic/adhd/ppl who didn't socialize much as a child, do y'all have ppl say shit like "can't you talk about anything besides yourself?"/"you're really selfish/self centered" to you??

#the last couple times I've been trying 2 talk 2 mom she keeps saying shit like that and its bugging me #bc 2 me im just having a conversation abt my day or whatever #or im saying smthn i wanted to tell her b4 i forget which occasionally interrupts her #and she keeps saying it like im being this narcissistic person or smthn. as if me talking abt the MH dolls i saw @ work last week is like- #idk man. like im boasting abt how great i am. also she asked when i was gonna grow up after i talked abt the dolls so. #anyway #ive noticed that idk how 2 rlly hold conversations with other ppl so i just- default to talking abt somethin i did or whatever #when idk how 2 respond 2 smthn. is that rlly me being self centered? #i just- all i had 2 talk 2 for the last like- 8 or 9 years was myself and now i have 2 socialize again & i feel like im being rude #or only talking abt myself bc i have no experience with talking 2 other ppl #idk #anyway lmk #autism #adhd #elliot rambles

[iknowwhereyousleepatnight]

the reason i’m not afraid of aging is because i want to be a hot middle-aged man who has a toxic yaoi relationship with another middle-aged man

#u know i used to be so afraid of aging until i realized that i want to be a dilf. now it’s kinda exciting #i realized recently that i could never picture myself living past my twenties until i pictured myself as a man #but like. i want to be a man and a woman and nothing and everything #but like. i’m cool with how i look now for the most part idk if i would want to transition physically at least not rn #and rn i still dress fem enough that everyone goes straight to she/her #and i like she/her but it hurts rn #bc some of my family has switched to they/them or it/its and it’s just so soothing #but family that knows i don’t like it still use she/her and phrases like ‘daughter’ or whatever even more often on purpose #and it hurts bc i don’t really feel the need to change the way i dress/look but i know everyone assumes she/her #when they see me in a dress or skirt. even w how very not-cis my fashion sense is #but also i fucking hate pants which is a separate thing (prob autism tbh) and even if i wore pants they’d still use she/her #thinking of changing my name to something very masc so i can confuse people enough that they’ll stop defaulting to she/her #and i haven’t told ppl outside my immediate family so idc if they use she/her but i’m fucking pissed when ppl in the family do it #anyways side note when i was 12 my ideal gender (b4 i knew about being non-cis) was a floating consciousness w no body #or a plastic-doll-like creation that’s smooth all over #… i still want to be a floating consciousness actually lmao. it would be great #back then i hated being a girl but i didn’t know there were more options and also i was socially isolated (didn’t leave home for like 2yrs) #and my mother was openly transphobic whenever the topic was brought up so that was my only real experience #but i didn’t really internalize it other than the fact that my mother would be rude if i ever happened to be not-cis and guess what? she is #anyways it’s like 2am and also i’m only awake bc i was captivated by a sugar daddy middle aged gay fic for a show i watched like 5 episodes #for 2 years ago #sorry for rambling in the middle of the night lol #gn y’all

[rinielelrandir]

Whenever someone in this one discord server I'm in complains about being neurodivergent and says they "wish they were neurotypical" I have to suppress the strong urge to tell them to unlearn their internalized abelism. Cause like, no, sorry, while being autistic or having ADHD might make it difficult to socialize and maintain friendships with neurotypicals, if you focus on friendships with other neurodivergent people you'll have an easier time. Because they'll grok your ways of being more easily. And some neurotypical folks will still think you're great even if you are bit "odd" to them. Trying to socialize like a neurotypical person is just setting yourself up for failure!

#like i know autism & adhd are still disabling #i could personally do with the ability to make myself food more easily or to clean my apartment more #but constantly whinning about how you wish you weren't autistic just drives me nuts #being autistic is great despite the disabling parts! #you gotta embrace all parts of yourself & not wish to be “normal” all the time #(the same people in this server that wish they were neurotypical also often say they wish they weren't trans) #(which drives me even more nuts bc being trans is awesome) #(society is what makes it suck)

[sherlock-is-ace]

.

#not having a great time today after my mom commented on my interests #i'm a person that is interested in shit i don't know this is why i'm very likely to follow disabled youtubers #in my time i have watched molly burke. multiplicityandme and a collection of autistic youtubers (guess why lol) #and my mom made a quite patronizing comment about how i ''take on causes'' by learning about stuff #and/or supporting fun and interesting youtube channels #but anyways it sucks even more because on her comment she made it clear (once again) that she doesn't believe me when i say #i might be autistic. and it fucking sucks! #because when i first talked to her about it even I didn't know much about it. i was just starting to do my research #and i was trying to make sense of things still but she dismissed it #but now that i do know more and things do make more sense #i can't even bring it up because the fact that i have been watching a lot of youtubers talk about autism will make her think #i'm just trying to be like them... which is stupid #but it's also the reason i didn't tell her that my best friend in my teens was trans. because i was trying to figure shit out myself #and telling her he was trans and then a bit later that i am as well was going to make her go ''everyone's trans now blah blah'' #and dismiss that as well... but now i'm trapped in the same thing about autism lol #and her stupid loophole of a dismissal isn't just by saying ''no you're not autistic'' it's saying this like ''well MAAAAYBE you COULD be #but that doesn't mean anything and it doesn't matter and why would you want a diagnosis if it's not gonna change anything'' #same thing as her whole ''sure you're a man but why do you have to look and act differently? YOU know who YOU are #who cares what others think?'' in a don't transition way #like that's so stupid! #dkfjhkdfhkdfg #i'm angry and i feel trapped #i have figured out a little bit ago that i don't stim near as enough as i need to BECAUSE i live in the same house as her #and the idea of ear defenders and other stuff like that is very appealing but i can't do that while she's around to judge #and IN PUBLIC?! that's unthinkable!! #i still remember the time she threatened with not going out with me (to the supermarket) because I commited the huge crime of #buttoning the top button of my button up shirt.... #that's it. that was the whole reason.. she thought i looked ridiculous and she didn't want to be seen with me... #imagine if i wear ear defenders out... #not gonna risk it lol

[waywardsalt]

shut the fuck up i’m thinking about link and linebeck being foils to each other

#rubbing my autistic hands together thinking of ways to make them compliment and contrast each other beyond what is presented in canon #loz #legend of zelda #phantom hourglass #link #linebeck #ok but. linebeck is like the best foil to link that i think exists in canon even more than ravio. unless i got them autism blinders on #if so lmk i'll still be thinking about link and linebeck being rlly good foils #okokok listen. a lot of their traits (most of links are implied but hear me out) contrast and can make up for the others #like yeah yeah linebeck's traits are typically portrayed as negative but they could have their uses if link's are taken to an extreme #like ive been thinkin abt linebeck w/ low empathy and link w/ high empathy and how that can work #link being much more willing to help others but linebeck being more capable of being more level-headed about it all #also their designs are like. kind of opposite to each other its great why not take it further huh its fun to think abt #im no character designer but like. link drawn with more circles and round shapes and soft angles vs #using more triangles and harsher angles and harder shapes for linebeck. do you see my vision here #like genuinely if you expand more on their traits and skillsets you've got a good duo that could compliment each other rlly well #this is absolutely delving into fanon but like. linebeck exists in ph a lot of the time to be used to show how cool n shit link is #the reverse doesnt really happen which sucks but it absolutely could #salty talks #im not good with the more technical parts of writing i'll admit so i may be a little off abt how character foils work #but i am thinking abt it here. as someone who writes and thinks about these two in tandem a lot

[soft-serve-soymilk]

when your right shoulder gets infected 😔

#My body trying to one-up V who got their papercut infected a while back #I remember scientifically explaining how it happened but now it’s like damn. my phagocytes aren’t doing their job either #I can SEE them not doing their job correctly #I’m not going to describe it for the sake of people’s stomachs and also not everyone can handle medical imagery like I can #but wow #I don’t think I’ve ever had an infection this bad in my whole life #Anyways too bad I’m forbidden from the gp I’m just going to keep trying to not touch it #Which is SO HARD considering I have the touch-unusual-surfaces-on-skin-to-make-them-go-away disorder (autism) #Summer sucks for a teenage body really #First I have pores that keep getting blocked from excessive hormones #and now we have sweat making it worse #Results have not been great this year for a start #Anyways at least crocheting just uses movement from the elbow down #So I don’t have to deal with any pain #In conclusion the no 1 thing I’m looking forward to when I leave this house is access to HEALTHCARE

[iamtiredofyourhorror]

it was a "personal post" because it was only about her blog and not intended for a wider audience than her own followers. not a crazy fault just oversteps that personal boundary to (esp as a stranger) reblog when it could never ostensibly have anything to do with you. i've been mutuals with them/in their group for years now and that's pretty normal for us. made her uncomfortable i assume (no ill will in this message)

Thats honestly understandable

#again i only got pissed off because she went on to do the whole SIGH do i need to get the reblog comprehension post #a lack of any way to tell otherwise made the whole thing come off extremely passive aggressive #i also as just a follower have no way to know the level of personalness to a post especially when its the blog handle #im not trying to come off as pissy here but in my 9+ years of using tumblr it is rare people /expect/ a post that isnt explicitly stated as- #no rb or mutuals only is personal unless it is clearly like a vent or smthn #which is why i saw it ok to rb it with a comment in the tags #idk maybe im too far into tumblr culture from when i was most active and times have changed #anon again im not pissy w u or anything and yeah this is helpful clarification #am i making sense its 2 am #maybe this is autism to autism miscommunication #ill admit i tend to take shit way too personally especially when its like. being put on 'blast' #most of the time ppl seem to dm when they want u to take smthn down #but hey tumblr differs for everyone #it kinda seems its become waayyyy more like twt since the Great Migration #i feel kind of like an old man shaking my stick on my lawn #welcome to my ted talk??? #idk i moved on quick thought the last anon was the last #we blocked eachother it seems i went to her blog to see if she was like sending ppl or smthn cause i got like ??? #confused over the anon and tbh thought it was her #anyways hope yall are chillin im leaving her alone #and probably not rb'ing as carelessly lmao

[jonny-b-meowborn]

I am genuinely so terrified of the fact that I have to find a job now. I'm trying to think of or look up a job that's suitable for my mentally ill autistic ass and I just. I don't know. Everything either requires some very specific qualifications that I don't have, or seems at best awfully exhausting, at worst literally putting me in danger. And I'm not even exaggerating, I genuinely think that working in retail, for example, could possibly kill me if I was forced to do that job for long enough. I sometimes get overwhelmed to the point of crying when there's too many other customers while I'm shopping, I can't imagine working in an environment like that. I suppose physical jobs could work, I've been to this blueberry plantation twice last week and mentally I was fine, but it was. So tiring. And you don't even make that much money a day, I don't think I could earn enough even if I did work there everyday, not to mention it's only a seasonal job. Right now it's fine for me to go there every now and then, but if I wanted to move out and become independent I'd have to get an actual day job. And that sounds impossible. The only job that sounds good to me is being an artist, it's not too mentally or physically difficult, and it's something I enjoy. But I'd have to get commissions constantly or start a small business or something like that to actually survive. And I'm not saying it's impossible, I know that people can live by being an artist, but it's so hard to get into that field. I wish I could do it but I dont know if it's possible for me. Makes me wanna cry. I hate this I hate that my brain isn't suited for this world and still I have to participate in all that shit that everyone has to do. My brain isn't made for working like that

#I've talked about this a lot with my sister who is also autistic #and were both like. on a similar level of autism i dont know how to properly explain it #were functioning in similar ways i guess #and we both agreed that we're in this awkward spot of being autistic #where we're not suited for living in this world the way we're expected #but we're good enough at surviving that we can't really ask for help #like from the government or smth #im not sure if im making sense #but like neither of us ever had a normal job for longer than a few days #she's incredibly lucky bc her boyfriend (also autistic lol) has rich parents #so he's able to have a small business where hes making youtube content and games and merch #and he gets financial support from his parents. so he can have the job he feels comfortable with and enjoys #and my sister is now able to work with him. theyre both making their silly little games and trinkets and are able to live normally #which is just so great for her i love that. im also so jealous lmao #and then theres me who also is made for creating art and not much else but im not lucky enough to be able to do that and survive #idk. my mom is great and doesn't put too much pressure on me. she was the one to take me to that blueberry job #and she really supprts my plans to be an artist full time #but still. thats really difficult to do. ugh #sometimes i wish that i either wasnt autistic at all or was 'less functioning' so at least i could get some help with living #bee buzz

[purpleenby]

Is me crying over not being able to get a vanilla frosty from wendys a pms thing, the last straw to cause an autistic meltdown, or both!! Take ur votes now folks

#also i cant tell if im getting sick or if its pms #but i am so fucking fatigued and my brain is not working today #which is great to deal with at a fast paced work environment :) #autism #actually autistic #vent post #pms

[giantkillerjack]

Today my partner and I discussed getting matching shirts that say "the hot bitch I pulled by being autistic" and each shirt has an arrow that points to the other person.

#original #diary #today we were watching a great show and a moment happened that made us both so happy that we #we skipped right over laughing and spontaneously launched into like a full 30 seconds of full body happy stimming #before laughter could even come out. happy stimming happens when i am so happy i must do something even more joyful than laughing #and she finished before me and i was still going and she came up to me and hugged me and told me i am so cute when i stim #it is like. so cool to discover positive stimming #and as sad as it is i had to suppress it most of my life i not only have it now but i also have a partner who actively encourages it #bc someone who loves you delights in seeing your purest expression of joy and seeks to cultivate that. #she is kind to me always #i just wanna yell at everyone about how they are supposed to be treated bc i wish someone had told me #i wouldn't give up my autism for any material thing in existence bc then i would be steven without his gem #i can happy stim in front of so few people and i generally think of myself as so open. but there are times it is unsafe to stim #and times where that safety or lack of it is unclear. and so masking is an unfortunate but necessary thing #and i have WAY more freedom in dropping my mask than most people bc i am white. #and people of color - especially Black men in my country (guess which one.) - are not given nearly as much leeway by society #but that is a super heavy topic and i am high and it is midnight so we will come the fuck back to that #'do u read critical race theory?' 'nah i just read some white stoners tumblr tags.' #anyway go listen to other people who are smarter than me and also not white if you wanna learn about this topic more #autism positivity #i love my wife

[danothan]

i love having dc mutuals! would love to follow one some day…

#danbles #dc #autisms #adhdposting #this special interest is a double edged sword bc i didnt think it would still atp feel as fresh as it did the first day #which is great! it means i can enjoy limitlessly!! #but it also means i’m constantly experiencing information overload and that weird anxiety you get around things that make you happy #i actually do have 2 dc mutuals rn (hi dc mutuals!!! thank you for lighting up my dash with joy 🫶) #but there are sooo many blogs i want to follow but can’t bring myself to unless i reach a certain point in my dc dive #i think i’m also worried that i’ll be spoiled/influenced before i even get to form my own opinions #so it’s even harder to follow if they’re not just posting art. you’re telling me there are words out there too?! #i feel like i’m in the garden of eden and at any point i’ll accidentally bite into an apple #i think i’m also just extra weary bc i’ve been burnt out in previous fandoms too #one day tho… one day i’ll be brave enough to have so many dc friends that we could throw a party!!! #in the meantime i’m so grateful to all the fellow dc fans that have been gracious enough to interact with me on my level T__T #discord ppl; random dms/anons; ppl ive met at comic stores… i’ll keep reading and learning more for these conversations 🫡 #and to all my non-dc friends that have been following me along in all this :’) number ones fr #waow… me when the special interest is special… heart

[moe-broey]

Oh okay so tumblr's tag system and organization is just incomprehensible. Understandable. Not even sure what to do about that tbh LMFAOOO

I WAS finally gonna change the "other's art" tags retroactively since I have a moment I might as well chip away at it. But the two I did change still show up under "other's art", and also looking at "my art" for SOME INEXPLICABLE REASON posts that aren't even tagged with anything relating to the words "art" or "my" (<- I THOUGHT I WAS ONTO SOMETHING HERE I THOUGHT MAYBE THE CONVO TAGS WERE TO BLAME) they. Appear. In that tag. WHY. LIKE. ONE POST THAT'S LITERALLY ONLY TAGGED AS "TAG GAME" IS IN THERE WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

And only I don't even know what to do now. Now my blog organization is ALL fucked up I've been tagging other people's art w "the gallery" and like. Do I change that now???? Do I move on forever forward????? Do I go back to "other's art" as it's more self-explanatory?????? I do like the whimsey of "the gallery" I want every artist who gets tagged that to have a mental image of me framing their work and putting it on display in a museum.

AUGH

#i still don't like the idea of having an art blog though bc i'm stubborn. you cannot separate my art from me. #you WILL experience the full range of me being annoying it comes with the autism which results in the art. you understand. #i also like being at least a little bit unseen a little bit unknowable (<- guy who bears his entire heart to the world voice) #(<- guy who WILL go in great detail and over explain it at great length voice)

[t3tr0m1n0]

if i knew flower meanings i'd be fucking unstoppable

#my character my dear character ashley with her magic ability to Create Plants And Shit. he should know flower meanings #you take the fact that i'm already a tarot-head + have a Lot a Lot of affection for constellations & their stories #i'd be the biggest symbolism user with autism this side of the mississippi #also sprach #i can't draw flowers or anything but just like. having that knowledge. it'd be great. i could throw that stuff everywhere #genuinely unrelated like i realized this just now yesterday/recently i went over the flowers unit in my bio class #probably more related is my watching of p2 which prominently features jun kurosu

[katya-goncharov]

I got an interview for the internship I applied for and on the one hand, exciting!! but on the other hand if I DO get accepted for it now I'll feel bad because my job's been going a lot better and they've actually been really nice to me lately

#it's like yeah my job is objectively probably just not a great environment for me for like autism reasons etc #but also i'd feel guilty leaving at such short notice after only 3 months which i'd have to do if i did the internship #and the main manager who runs the place is a lot nicer than MY manager who does my performance reviews and keeps giving me borderline #ableist feedback. and the main manager is the one who'd have to deal with the aggro if i quit #ugh i'm overthinking this again aren't i. i probably won't even get accepted for the internship!