#what if i told you this post was inspired by me listening to SURFACE PRESSURE from encanto and thinking ''it's mac'' | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

feisty-emblem · 3 years

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Let’s kick this blog off with the ship that inspired me in the first place!

Yuri/Byleth NSFW

Word Count: ~2700 Contains: FTM Byleth, Post-Skip, mild Golden Deer spoilers, lots of Firsts for Byleth

The sun sank beneath the horizon, suspending Garreg Mach in cool indigos and soothing blues. Candles flickered the windows of most dorms but even those winked out one by one as the hour grew later. The Alliance army had suffered a long battle, a longer march, and deserved a long rest.

Byleth waded through the night. All around him, the monastery was settling in for sleep. The clang of metal on metal had stopped ringing from the training ground. Fireflies drifted lazily around the few guards still on patrol. Throughout Garreg Mach, quills had been put away, ink bottles capped, and nightly prayers whispered.

But Byleth knew better. As he walked, he could almost feel Abyss awake under his boots, like the buzz of a hive. There was always work to be done. Even here on the surface, Byleth watched cats uncurl and stretch as the time for their hunt arrived. Bats wove between stars. Far away, beyond the walls, a wolf howled.

Yet— even Claude’s window was dark now. Enbarr was behind them. Though there was more fighting to be done, the war was over. That was cause enough for Byleth to turn towards his room.

Inside, Byleth locked the door, lit the lone candle on his desk, and began freeing himself of his clothes. All the while, his mind was a few feet below— on Abyss. On wherever capturing Enbarr had inflicted on its people. On what Yuri could be doing.

Because even after that march, Byleth knew Yuri would be awake. He would stay up as long as his legs would hold him trying to solve all the worries of Abyss at once. Yuri cared for nothing and no one more than his people. Except his mother, of course.

Byleth had no idea where he ranked on that scale. Yuri cared about him some amount, that much was certain. Shortly before the battle of Gronder, Yuri had cornered him in the church, kissed him deeply, and told him not to die.

That kiss had led to many more. Sometimes after having tea in the gardens there would be slow, cautious kisses exchanged between rose bushes. Other times they would find themselves alone after strategy meetings and Byleth would end up with his back against the wall and his arms around Yuri’s waist.

All Byleth knew was that Yuri didn’t want him dead. And that Yuri liked kissing him. But neither fact told Byleth where exactly he placed on Yuri’s priorities. And that was okay— there were more important things to worry about, Byleth told himself. There were more important things than the ugly disappointment Byleth routinely felt when he heard Yuri laugh at someone else's jokes, or flirted with a peddler for a better price, or told Byleth he was too busy for lunch.

Shaking his head, Byleth continued to strip until he was in nothing but his small clothes. Comfortable summer air flew in through the window. Forgoing his usual sleep shirt, Byleth blew out the candle, and fell into bed.

For the next few hours, he could forget about Abyss, Enbarr, Shamballa— and Yuri. For a few hours he could leave the mess that was his feelings for Yuri in the waking world and dissolve into dreams.

That had been the plan anyway. But just as Byleth got comfortable, his door opened. He sat up, calling magic to his fingertips, nerves on end.

“Yuri?”

Yuri walked in as if he did this every night. He shut and locked the door behind him, kicking off his boots as he said, “I thought you’d never get here. I’ve been watching your window for over an hour.”

“Seteth and I were going over the route to Shamballa.” Byleth narrowed his eyes as he realized Yuri wasn’t wearing his usual outfit. He stood in Byleth’s room in a simple tunic and dark pants. A belt around his waist sported a dagger but as Byleth stared, Yuri took it off and looped it over the desk chair. “What are you doing here?” Byleth asked when Yuri also removed his tunic.

Yuri didn’t answer. Down to just his pants, he climbed gracefully onto the bed until his knees were parallel to Byleth’s hips, hands pressed into the mattress beside Byleth’s head. He held himself up inches from Byleth.

“You alright?” Yuri’s breath caressed Byleth’s lips.

“What?”

“Are you feeling alright? After marching all the way here? No injuries I somehow missed?”

“N-No, I’m fine.”

A smirk. “Good.”

Yuri kissed him. It was a different kind of kiss than the ones they had exchanged before. Or maybe the angle was just different— Byleth wasn’t used to Yuri hovering above him. Or the way his hair fell down to tickle Byleth’s forehead. Or the pressure of Yuri’s hips descending on his own.

Byleth pushed Yuri back with a slight press to his clavicle. “What are you doing?”

Yuri chuckled. “I thought that might be obvious.”

“But—” Byleth struggled to sit up. Yuri let him, still with a knee on either side of Byleth, hands going to Byleth’s shoulders to keep steady in his lap. “But why now? I thought you would be busy.”

“Oh I am. I’ll have a lot to do come morning.”

“So then—”

Yuri cupped Byleth’s face. “Because you work hard. And so do I. And there’s never going to be an end to it.”

Byleth swallowed, eyes not leaving Yuri’s. Moonlight spilled in through the window and turned Yuri’s hair into an aura, his gaze into sharpened amethyst.

“The war is over, but there’s already another fight on our plate,” Yuri continued. “After that they’ll be something else to fight. I can already tell. There will always be someone or something left to fight. You’ll be in every major battle on the continent until the day you die, Byleth. The Church knows you’re useful, and they don’t let go of useful people easily. You have Claude’s trust. When he runs into trouble building his new world, who do you think he’s going to turn to?”

Fingers ghosted down Byleth’s neck. Yuri sheathed his gaze for a moment to follow the path of his hands. “It’s the same for me.” Never had Yuri’s voice sounded smaller. His fingers traveled back up and found a home in Byleth’s hair. “We’re the same. And I realized you don’t have to do it all alone.”

Byleth held Yuri by the wrists. “I don’t want you to do it alone anymore,” Byleth confessed. “I want to help you, Yuri. I want—”

A kiss cut him off. A slow kiss that Byleth didn’t try to resist. Yuri tilted Byleth’s head back, tongue roaming free, drawing a moan from Byleth. It would be so easy to just lay back and let this happen. Let Yuri kiss him into oblivion. But there was more to say.

“Yuri—”

“You’re not listening to me.” Yuri pressed his forehead to Byleth’s. “It doesn’t have to just be you helping me. Let me help you, friend. I want to take care of you.” He accented this with a roll of his hips. Something solid made brief contact with Byleth’s midriff and he let out a stuttered moan. “Goddess knows you deserve it.”

Byleth hands dropped to Yuri’s waist, trying to keep him still even as Yuri’s lips flit across the bridge of his nose. “B-But why?”

Yuri froze. He drew back, eyes softening with confusion. “Why what?”

“Why do you want to take care of me so badly?”

“Why—” Yuri’s lip quirked up. “Do you think I make out with everyone?”

“No…”

“Do you think I make everyone in the army promise me they’ll come back alive? Do you see me dragging Claude back into the stables after chores? Or staring at Balthus while he trains?”

“No.” Byleth felt his face color. “So then—”

“Yes.”

“Oh.”

Yuri cupped Byleth’s face again, smirk firmly in place now. “Should I tell you exactly how precious you are to me or can I get to why I’m here in the first place?”

Byleth gulped. “We can— Yuri, you should know I’ve never… you know. Anything like this before.”

“Oh we’re not going to get far talking like that.”

Without warning, Yuri pushed Byleth back, pinning his wrists to the bed before he could react. It would be pathetic in any other circumstance— the Ashen Demon being held down in his own bed— but Yuri did it effortlessly, leaning down to speak directly in Byleth’s ear. “I said I’m going to take care of you. Anything you want, you’ll get. I’ll even stop if you like. But if you can’t even say the word sex, I don’t know if I can trust you to direct me.”

Byleth’s mind was spinning. Anything he wanted. Anything from Yuri. In truth he would take whatever Yuri felt like giving him— even just kissing as they had before would be satisfying. But… if this was truly what Yuri wanted to do…

And didn’t Byleth deserve it? To be doted on for once?

“I’ve never had sex,” Byleth stated. He tried to will away his blush but Yuri kissed the apple of his cheek and Byleth felt his shame ebb. “I’ve never wanted to. Before now.” Byleth turned to catch Yuri’s lips, keeping the contact light so he could whisper, “Not before you.”

That seemed to be all Yuri needed to hear. He deepened the kiss, hands sliding off Byleth’s wrists to flit over his chest. Those skilled, confident, wonderful hands lingered over Byleth’s surgery scars before skimming lower, tracing old battle wounds and minding new bruises from Enbarr.

“Tell me what you want,” Yuri said into Byleth.

“Y-You.”

“Cute.” A chaste kiss. “Be more specific.”

But words were growing difficult. Every touch was a new sensation. Every kiss left Byleth breathless. And Yuri was everywhere, it seemed. Overwhelming didn’t begin to describe it.

Byleth bucked his hips up, gasping when he felt Yuri’s length press against his crotch. Of course it only lasted a split second but by the grace of the Goddess Yuri seemed to understand. As Byleth flopped back to his bed, Yuri followed, moving against Byleth, the layers of clothing making it somehow more arousing.

Yuri chuckled. “If I may make a suggestion…” His fingers dipped into Byleth sleep pants. Eyes blown wide with pleasure met Byleth’s, waiting. Sothis bless this man. Byleth nodded vigorously. “Ah ah, use your words.”

“Please.”

“Better.”

More heat crept into Byleth’s face as Yuri undressed him. Byleth couldn’t count the number of times he had stripped off blooded garments in the middle of camp, in full view of cooks and mercenaries and healers and officers. He was no stranger, even, to seeing Yuri pulling off his own clothes in favor tending to a wound directly.

Yet now, here, moonlight gliding over Yuri’s skin as he tugged off his own pants, Byleth felt himself swallow. His eyes trailed low and he swallowed again.

A finger under his chin made Byleth look up. Yuri kissed him— light, comforting, a reprieve from the tight coil in Byleth’s chest stuck between fight or flight. “Alright?” Yuri murmured.

“I’m alright.” Byleth sounded steadier than he imagined he would. Perhaps a little high, but steady. He drew confidence from that. “I don’t want penetration tonight.”

Yuri pulled back to nod. “Then what would you like?”

“Can you just…” Oh how to phrase this? “Um. I would like…”

“Hm?”

Byleth suddenly wanted nothing more than to reset to when they were just kissing. That was much less complicated. He didn’t know the right terms for this, he didn’t know what he wanted, he had never done this before—

“Hey, stay with me.”

At some point, Byleth had shut his eyes. He opened them now to find Yuri staring down at him with clear concern. For the first time, Yuri was frowning. “Do you want to stop?” Byleth bit his lip. Yuri let go of Byleth completely and began shifting away.

Byleth reached out to hold him secure. “No! No, don’t— I don’t want to stop.”

Yuri, knees still bracketing Byleth, ran a soothing hand over Byleth’s side. “Talk to me. Come on, friend, whatever you want, remember?”

Sucking in a lungful of air— air mixed with the scent of Yuri— Byleth said, “I want you a-against me.”

He waited for Yuri to call him cute again. To maybe say the correct term for the act, if there was one, or admonish Byleth for being too vague.

Neither happened. Yuri simply nodded again and kissed Byleth, lowering himself until their cocks brushed together. Byleth gasped. Through clothing was absolutely nothing compared to—

“Like that?” Yuri prompted, thrusting slowly against Byleth.

“Just like that.” Byleth pulled Yuri to him, burying his face in Yuri’s neck and kissing there for good measure. “Yes, like that, yes.”

Yuri picked up the pace, letting Byleth pull him down to cover him completely, chests pressed together. One hand went down to hold Byleth’s legs open wider and Byleth whimpered, suddenly aware how wet he was. Yuri nipped at Byleth’s ear before asking, “Can you come like this?”

Only a handful of times had Byleth pleasured himself. And of those times he had only come a few. But this felt different— this sent sparks up Byleth’s spine and made him pant shamelessly against Yuri’s shoulder. If he had a heart, it would likely be beating out of his chest. “Yes,” Byleth groaned.

To his surprise, Yuri pushed himself up, hovering over Byleth once again. Still rutting against him, Yuri smirked. “I want to see your face. Make sure I know I did good by you.”

Byleth was trembling but he still forced out, “Y-You could never… never disappoint me, Yuri.”

Another frown crossed Yuri’s face before he chased it off with a smirk. “Maybe not now but—”

Byleth reached out to cup Yuri’s cheek. “Don’t talk like that.”

“I just mean—”

“Anything I want, right?” Byleth fixed Yuri with a stern look he usually reserved for war meetings. “You said you’d give me anything I wanted. I want you to not talk like that.”

It was Yuri’s turn to swallow. He hesitated in his thrusts, covering Byleth’s hand with his own. After a moment, he shook his head, smile overtaking the smirk. “Of course. Apologies, friend.”

Byleth nodded and pulled Yuri back down for a kiss, tensing only when Yuri started moving again, trying to concentrate on mapping Yuri’s mouth. His hands pressed over the small of Yuri’s back, urging Yuri on and desperate for as much contact as possible. He wanted to feel all of Yuri.

How could Byleth have ever been hesitant about this? It was Yuri, it was just his Yuri making Byleth feel so so good.

It didn’t take long for Byleth to break the kiss with a shaky, “I-I’m close.”

Yuri lifted himself up again, inches from Byleth’s face. “I’ve got you. Let it happen.”

One final hard press of Yuri’s cock— and Byleth lost track of the world. A ringing echoed in his ears and he was only faintly aware of his mouth hanging open, head thrown back. Yuri’s voice became a hum that seemed to course through Byleth’s whole body.

It took a few moments for Byleth to return to himself. Both his hands were bunched in the fabric of his blanket. Yuri had laid down beside him, red faced and gasping.

Byleth didn’t trust his body to respond properly yet. Everything felt like jelly, even his neck as he turned to look at Yuri. “D-D-Did you… do you need me to...?”

Yuri snickered, face half pressed into the bed. “I’m t-taken care of. No need to worry yourself.” He lifted himself on his elbows to reveal a damp spot on the blanket. Byleth was sure his side of the bed didn’t look much better, but looking would require effort.

As if sensing his reluctance, Yuri shuffled closer to throw one arm over Byleth, nuzzling into his neck. Byleth was just able to wrap an arm around Yuri. “That was…” Once again, Byleth found words a challenge. With a sigh, Byleth kissed Yuri’s forehead. “Thank you.”

Yuri hummed and curled into Byleth’s side. “You’re welcome.”

Outside, the moon rose still higher in the sky, stars twinkling peacefully over Garreg Mach. Byleth relished at being exhausted by something other than battle or planning or marching. And it didn’t take much to let himself drift off to sleep, holding Yuri secure— unable to come up with a good reason to ever let him go.

#yurileth #fire emblem three houses #yuri leclerc #yuri fire emblem #byleth eisner #byleth fire emblem #first fic on this blog please read the pinned post #im prolly gonna find a ton of mistakes later but take this #thats what practice is for!

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r6shippingdelivery · 3 years

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I saw someone on Twitter post about how they wanted to see jealous Glaz, and I was struck by inspiration 😄 This fic is mostly about Glaz's perception of his place in Rainbow after Kali joins, and the bit with Fuze can be read as friendship or budding romance, whatever your like better.

WARNING: While Glaz is an unreliable narrator here, and Kali is not outright demonized, I haven't been kind to her either. So if she's your favorite character, proceed with caution.

You can also read the story in AO3, as the latest chapter of the Discord Ficlets collection.

Hatred was a shallow emotion, one that lived at surface level and hid deeper and more complex feelings, ones that people found harder to confront or admit and thus resorted to hate.

Glaz experienced that during his stint in the South Ossetia War, when the hatred they all felt for the enemy was just a cover for their sense of helplessness at stopping so much unnecessary death. As always, art became a way to express and work out his emotions, and from what he saw it was far healthier than drowning his sorrows in alcohol like most of his fellow soldiers did.

Over the years, Glaz had acquired a reputation for being a pretty stable person, not letting his emotions rule him but not burying and ignoring them either. So it was a shock to realise he was letting his emotions rule his opinion of a certain person.

It would be unfair to say he hated Kali. The Nighthaven leader had done nothing directly unpleasant to him, in fact Glaz wasn’t even sure if they ever had a conversation. But fuck, seeing her smug face made his blood boil. Admitting he was jealous was a bitter pill to swallow.

Glaz felt sidelined since she arrived. At first it had been normal that Kali got so much action in training matches and different situations, Harry always did that to ensure new additions got properly integrated in the team. However, Kali stopped being the new one and she kept being requested more and more often. If someone devised a plan that required a sniper, it was always her that got the call, almost never Glaz.

Sure, she was an excellent shot, but so was he. So were the other operators who had marksman training. Yet the only requested sniper was Kali. Even for the strategies that relied heavily on stealth, which made no sense to Glaz since Kali’s rifle was extremely loud and she refused to use a silencer. She insisted it wasn’t compatible with her weapon, which was utter bullshit in Glaz’s opinion. Then there were the snippets of conversations he heard from her in the shooting range.

“Of course I don’t use a thermal scope, that’s a crutch, and those are for beginners, not professionals.”

“I don’t hide behind smoke curtains like a child clinging to their mother’s skirts.”

“I could give you some pointers, you’d benefit by learning from a real sniper, Dokka.”

The gall of that woman! Glaz had never wanted to wipe the floor with someone as much as he did then, but when he approached them to offer a friendly marksman competition, Dokkaebi happily accepted while Kali sniffed and declined. “I’m busy now, maybe another time.”

Glaz silently fumed for days. He didn’t give a damn about Kali’s opinions; he knew he was an excellent sniper and she could make as many snide comments as she wanted. Nothing would change the truth. However, Glaz also had the feeling she was trying to undermine him, and he didn’t like that. Most operators in Rainbow were competitive by nature, but except for a few rivalries, the trash talking had always remained upfront and somewhat respectful, never behind another operator’s back. Things remained as they were, somewhat tense but peaceful, for a long time. Until the Invitational rolled around.

When the teams were publicly announced, the Spetsnaz were collectively surprised some of them were chosen to participate, unlike the previous year. Glaz didn’t mind sitting among the public again, and privately he and Kapkan made a point of keeping an eye out during the event. The White Masks might have been mostly obliterated, but they weren’t the only terrorist group in the world, and a huge gathering like this would be a tempting objective for any group looking to make a name for themselves. So he was fine with not being selected, truly. However, what he wasn’t fine with was the way Harry said one particular thing:

“And to showcase Rainbow’s prowess in long distance combat, team Ash will have our resident sniper, Kali.”

Seriously? The resident sniper, as in the only one? Glaz grit his teeth so hard he was sure everyone in the room could hear it. He refused to say anything, though, he wouldn’t turn this briefing into a spectacle. However, that didn’t stop him from hoping Tachanka would teach her a lesson with his new fire grenades. That would certainly put a smile on Glaz’s face.

Alas, that was not meant to happen, even if it came pretty close to actually becoming a reality. In the end, Tachanka’s team was eliminated, same as Fuze’s, and the tournament went on. Glaz thought nothing else would happen, and aside from secretly hoping for team Mira to win, he largely lost interest in the competition. Yet the competition, or more accurately, Kali, didn’t lose interest in them.

When Fuze told them he’d been invited to train with Nighthaven, none of the Spetsnaz was particularly pleased, since they worked better as a team, but they didn’t voice any objections either. Glaz wanted to, he wanted to forbid Fuze from doing it, but he was a rational man and knew that was both unreasonable and a douchebag move. If Fuze wanted to train with others, he was free to do so, of course. Glaz kept repeating that to himself, even if deep down he was sure that Kali woman wanted to take everything that he had, from his position as a sniper to his friends.

Aware of how childish that sounded, Glaz grimaced at his own thoughts. He needed to calm his mind, and as always, he turned to art. Painting would surely grant him that state of inner peace he sorely needed while waiting for Fuze to come back from his session with Nighthaven. Losing himself in the process of creating something always helped Glaz exorcise his demons, and also lose track of the world around him. At least until Fuze came back.

Most people painted Fuze as unreadable, but he wasn’t to Glaz. The artist could see clear as day that Fuze was deep in thought. The curiosity and need to know was eating Glaz inside.

“How did it go?” He asked, aiming for a casual and carefree tone. He wasn’t sure he succeeded.

“Interesting.” As always, Fuze was succinct and straight to the point, going for the shortest message. However, Glaz knew that if one took the time to shut up and listen, Fuze would say more. “They’re an effective team, very competitive. It’s good to have them working with us and not against us, but I don’t think they feel part of Rainbow.”

It wasn’t the first time Glaz heard before some of those sentiments echoed around when it came to Nighthaven, but Fuze delivered with an admirable lack of judgement. The Uzbek relayed a blow by blow account of the training match, and Glaz wondered how Aruni felt at Kali’s call of her safety being expendable. It was just a game for now, but training built habits that one carried back to the battlefield. He was still pondering over what he heard when Fuze dropped a bombshell that shook him to the core.

“Kali offered me work in Nighthaven.”

Glaz saw red, and for a moment he couldn’t think. The looks in his eyes must have been a veritable maelstrom of repressed anger and jealousy, because Fuze looked taken aback. A burning sensation coiled in his chest, and Glaz clenched his fist hard to avoid unleashing a storm of swears, since Fuze wasn’t the target of his fury.

*crack*

The paint brush he’d been holding broke under the pressure of his clenched hand, but Glaz didn’t notice, and clenched his fist even tighter.

“Timur!”

It was Fuze calling out his name that finally brought Glaz down to earth, away from the dark spiral of what ifs where Fuze left the team, lured away by Kali. He opened his hands, revealing the brush he accidentally snapped in half, and how the jagged edge of the broken wood had sunk into his palm. Oh. He hadn’t even noticed that.

Glaz briefly mourned the loss of his favorite small brush, dropping the pieces aside and wiping the blood from his palm carelessly. “And? Did you accept?”

Fuze regarded him in silence for a few seconds, before shaking his head as if he couldn’t believe Glaz’s foolishness. “Of course not. I have my team. And I’m not going anywhere.” This assurance was a balm for Glaz’s turmoil, but then Fuze added with a smirk. “Besides, I know you always have my back and won’t put a bullet in me, not even a fake one.”

The laugh and lingering look they shared made Glaz feel that all was right in the world, at least for a little while. He knew he could always count on his team, on his friends, and having this belief reaffirmed soothed him like nothing else did. It had been foolish to think Fuze would leave him.

#rainbow 6 siege #r6s #rainbow six siege #glaz #fanfiction

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princess-of-riviaa · 4 years

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Dirty Little Brat

Anonymous said: Could you write a Ransom one shot about him punishing you for being a brat and not listening to him when you were out shopping with him earlier?

Summary: After teasing your boyfriend all day, Ransom’s had enough of your games. So he shows his friends just the kind of whore he can turn you into.

Author’s Note: This oneshot was inspired by this post by the lovely @et-lesailes. Thank you for letting me run with this idea!

Warning(s): exhibitionism, teasing, oral (m receiving), spanking, a cliffhanger of an ending cuz i feel like being a tease (also i can’t write)

Word Count: 1,077

You want to blame it on the alcohol. You always act like a brat when you’re drunk. But you have no excuse for acting like that all day, especially not when Ransom spent four hours shopping with you today and let you buy anything and everything you wanted. No, you couldn’t blame this on the alcohol.

Your boyfriend knows this too, which is why the constant pressure of his hand on your thigh for the entire duration of this party has made you uneasy. You know he’s fumming under the surface, just waiting to get home and punish you. But Ransom’s buddies won’t leave him alone, and even though he’s turned down their offer of smoking with them tonight, you’re both still stuck up in the loft with Ransom’s three closest friends.

You’re sitting on his lap, his arm wrapped tight around you. You’re still annoyed from the small argument you’d just had with him a few minutes ago. The only reason you’re sitting on his lap now is to hide his erection from his stoned buddies. Your fights always had a way of turning him on--it was probably due to the rough sex you always ended up having in the middle of it--and tonight is no different.

“I’m going to fuck you so hard when we get home,” Ransom spits in your ear, “that you won’t be able to breathe.”

You huff and roll your eyes. “I don’t feel like having sex tonight.” It’s a lie, of course. You both know your libido is as intense as Ransom’s, if not more so.

He growls, though only you seem aware of it. His friends are either too far away or too strung out to hear him. “Don’t you fucking lie to me, sweetheart.”

I glare at him. “What? Does the thought of me not wanting you get under your skin?”

You’re pushing his buttons. It’s a dangerous game, but the reward is always worth it. You love the way he fucks you when he’s pissed off, love the way he chooses to punish you every time, too.

But now you’ve pushed him too far. He adjusts you over his lap so your ass is now sticking up in the air over his legs. He pulls your dress up enough to reveal that you’re wearing no panties and spanks you hard on both cheeks. You gasp--partly in pain, and partly because… did he actually just spank you in front of his friends?

“Whoa,” one of them slurs out, blinking through their stupor to make sense of what Ransom just did.

“Don’t be a brat and act all surprised when I punish you for it,” Ransom says through gritted teeth before spanking you again.

This time your entire body jumps at the pain. Your ass is already stinging, stained with his red handprint. You love it. Though you’ll never admit that to him out loud. Just like you’ll never admit that him treating you like his whore in front of his friends is making you wet faster than anything else ever has.

But you don’t have to tell him, because two seconds later his fingers are spreading your cheeks, revealing your glistening pussy to the world.

“You’re fucking soaked for a girl who doesn’t want me,” Ransom spits, throwing your words back in your face. “I haven’t even started on you yet.”

“Holy shit, Ransom,” one of his friends laughs nervously, unable to believe what he’s seeing.

Ransom takes his gaze off of you and looks over at his friends. “You wanna watch me punish her?”

“Fuck yeah,” his other friend replies without missing a beat.

You’d be offended that they’re so willing to admit that, if you weren’t already so aroused by what’s about to happen.

“What about you?” Ransom asks you, taking a fistful of your hair and yanking your head back so you can look him in the eyes. “Do you want me to fuck you in front of them? Want to show them how much of a whore you really are?”

All you can do is moan, aroused past the point of speaking.

Ransom tsks. “What am I doing, asking you? We both know I’m gonna take whatever I want from you, and you’ll be more than happy to give it to me. Stand up.”

You do as he says, surprised to find your legs so unsteady when you do.

Ransom spreads his legs, offering his sheathed cock to you. “You know what to do.”

You don’t have to be told before you start unbuttoning his jeans and slide them down enough to reveal his hardened cock in all of it’s thick glory. You whimper when you see the vein that runs along the underside of his shaft, from base to tip. Your mouth instantly waters. Ransom throws his arms across the back of the couch, looking like the king of hell as you begin to lick the head of his cock like it’s the most delicious ice cream cone you’ve ever had the pleasure of tasting.

“Yeah that’s right, baby girl,” Ransom growls, “show them how well you take my cock.”

His words spur you on and you take him all the way in your mouth. You gag when his cock brushes against your throat but do your best to keep your lips wrapped around his base until you reach your limit. Drool and pre-cum strings from your mouth to his cock as you pull back, gasping for air. Ransom brings his hand to your face and rubs his pre-cum around, letting it soak into your skin. You let him touch you, eager to be as dirty for him as he wants you to be.

“Get on the couch,” he orders, suddenly desperate to be deep inside of you. “On your stomach, ass in the air. Hold onto the arm of the couch--you’ll need the support.”

You eagerly comply, ready to be fucked in front of his friends. You don’t look over at them to see what they’re doing--you can’t pull your attention away from Ransom long enough to do so--but you can feel the heat of all three of their gazes burning a hole in you, only adding to the heat in your core. Ransom lines himself up behind you. He teases your folds with the tip of his cock before quickly pushing himself all the way inside of you.

You’ve never cum so quickly in your life as you did that night.

***

Tag Squad:

@agniavateira @hnryycvll @littlefreya @celestial-vomit @lestersglitterglue @watermeloncavill @honeychicana @penwieldingdreamer @mary-ann84 @elixasays @buckysgoldenheart @noz4a2 @trippedmetaldetector @omgkatinka @lunedelorient @aphrodites-punch @yespolkadotkitty @sweetybuzz25 @iloveyouyen @deathonyourtongue @utterlyhopeful @wondersofdreaming @tsukuyomi011 @the-soot-sprite @desperate-and-broken @jayismz @emelinelovesjc @palaiasaurus64 @wolvesandhoundshowltogether @henrythickcavill @secretlyactivated @madbaddic7ed @persephonehemingway @geralt-of-baevia @stargazingfangirl18 @thedarkplume @spookypeachx @pensieveforyourthoughts @aletheladyinred @littlemissthistle

Let me know if you want to be added/removed from my taglist!

#ransom drysdale #ransom thrombey x you #ransom drysdale imagine #ransom drysdale smut #ransom drysdale x you #ransom drysdale fic #ransom thrombey fanfic #ransom thrombey imagine #ransom thrombey x reader #chris evans #chris evans smut #chris evans imagine #chris evans fanfiction

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wedreamedlove · 4 years

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Into Your World [Xu Mo Character Study]

I'm back with another post that's been rattling around in my brain, except it's a bit disconnected. However, there's been a theme that I've wanted to focus in on with Xu Mo: each other's worlds, their dreams (goals and/or fancies), and water imagery.

Contains spoilers for Chapter 24 and unreleased dates in ENG.

First, I want to give a disclaimer that MC is pretty much the only person who can get into the mens' inner worlds, and that's why they're the romantic main characters; but there's just something a little poignant with Xu Mo because of his archetype.

Li Zeyan's archetype makes him belong to another world because of his wealthy background and social status. Zhou Qiluo's archetype makes him belong to another world because it's the dark side of humanity, and he actively tries to keep MC away from that. Bai Qi's archetype is how they're already in the same world and they just need to open up to each other LOL he's the guy next door.

However, Xu Mo's archetype is literally the alienated genius [Official Life History] since he was a child and, after he lost his parents, he just threw himself into his studies and goals and didn't bother making connections with anyone.

Xu Mo: Mm, I graduated early.

Xu Mo's tone was normal, as if it were a matter unrelated to him and there was no sense of pride at all. However, it still made people impressed.

MC: So, when you were in high school, you spent all your time studying?

Xu Mo: At that time, yes.

MC: Why?

Xu Mo: Silly, why are there so many why's? It's just like when you were going to take your entrance exams, there were things I also needed to do.

[Blossom Date - CN Translation]

Heck, even now, MC is the only one he replies to in his Moments [Official Character Profile].

Since the moment we meet him, he takes on the "mentor" role and teaches MC about things. She mentions this all the time, about how he teaches her the laws of the world, etc. Xu Mo is innately part of another world because the realm of geniuses is not supposed to be understood.

However, this isn't a one-way street. Just as we can't understand them, they can't understand us. So, as MC makes an effort to understand Xu Mo, he is also making an effort to understand her.

IMO this is what makes the following interactions extremely tender and romantic.

MC: The white noise you recommended last time was really effective! Lately, my work efficiency has gone up!

Xu Mo: That's good.

Xu Mo: But, instead of your work efficiency, I hope it was useful for your sleeping problem.

MC: Recently, I listen to the sound of rain before sleeping. It feels like everything around me gets quiet when I relax and listen to it.

Xu Mo: It seems like our preferences are the same. I also like to listen to the rain when I'm relaxing.

Xu Mo: The sound of rain droplets striking the roof is calming, isn't it?

MC: It's great collecting only the sounds you like and then completely entering your own world.

Xu Mo: Then, will you also let me hear those sounds?

Xu Mo: I'd like to hear your world.

By the way, given the timeline of this conversation, this is an incredible foreshadowing of his [Nightmare ASMR].

One time, when I was studying in England, I spent months finishing a particularly tricky piece of my dissertation. After I sent it through the mail, it was already nine in the morning. I was a bit tired and planned on sleeping. The weather in England is often rainy, so it was also raining that morning and it was dark. The sound of the rain striking the windowsill was clear and it sounded soothing too.

Then, there was the sound of a piano from below. It was Chopin’s Nocturne, and played very well. Every note mixed in with the sound of the rain… unhurried drops, pitter-pattering. All was quiet, as if I was separated from the world. I stared at the curtains that were being lifted by the wind and, before I knew it, I fell asleep.

[...]

Although I don’t remember it at all anymore, I dimly feel that when I was small I also experienced a night like this. The sound of the rain, the sound of the piano… Outside the window, it’s very, very cold. I can hear the sound of the wind striking the window. And in my half-awake and half-asleep state, I’m put into a warm embrace… Closing my eyes like this… I’m able to sink into a deep, deep sleep… Just like… this right now…

[Fastened Door to the Heart]

MC: From time to time, I just want to go to your world and take a look.

Caption: Actually, I'd rather go to your world and take a look.

So, anyway, going back to the theme of entering each other's inner worlds. You can see it explicitly said here in the Reading Date. They basically exchanged reading material because she wants to understand him, with his complicated science book, and he wants to understand her, with the comics she read when she was young.

Okay, now we're going to switch tracks for a bit and this might seem disconnected (I warned you!), but take my hand because I'm definitely trying to go somewhere with this.

Part of understanding someone's world is learning about their inner thoughts, their dreams, their wishes, their fantasies, however silly or childish or abstract all of these can be.

This is also an incredibly huge point with Xu Mo because, through MC, we're supposed to feel a sense of pressure from such an accomplished scholar character, but he always works hard to diminish that sense of intimidation and presence [Xu Mo's EQ Character Study] and he never demeans her interests or makes her feel lesser for her intelligence.

Xu Mo: Either way, there must be something that only you can create.

MC: Something only I can make... Ah, I know!

Getting an idea, I divided the batter in my hands into two and made a fish and a wing.

I tried combining the two, but something felt missing.

Xu Mo, who came to my side at some point, took a spoon and used it to make scales on the back of the fish.

Xu Mo: Don't you think it looks more like one with this?

Xu Mo: Can you tell me why you thought of this?

MC: ... You won't laugh when you hear it?

Xu Mo: I think it depends on what you tell me.

MC: Then I won't tell you!

Xu Mo: I'm kidding. Will you tell me?

I didn't have anywhere to run when he looked at me and so, cornered, I told him a childish thought that I had never told anyone up to now.

MC: When I was small and I heard the story of Qixi, I thought the Milky Way was a real river with water running through it.

MC: So I ended up worrying over whether the swallows would have an accident, fall into the water, and drown...

MC: I thought that'd be sad for the swallows and so I lied to myself the entire time.

MC: That the ones who made the bridge for the weaver girl and cowherd where flying fish.

I moved the flat fish with its wing in front of him while I spoke, making it fly clumsily.

Xu Mo burst out laughing, as if he wasn't able to hold it back. My face turned bright red from the embarrassment and I returned the fish to the desk.

MC: It's really stupid, isn't it...

Xu Mo: Silly girl, you have batter on your face.

He wiped my face with the pad of his finger. There was a smile that he couldn't suppress on his mouth.

MC revealed her inner child to him, which she had never told anyone else, and he doesn't judge her for it. Please tell me you can feel the tenderness radiating out of this interaction!

Now, although the above interaction was Qixi-themed, I still find it intriguing that she replaced the swallows with (flying) fish. Because Xu Mo is all about water imagery [Xu Mo Character Study] and this appears in their next interaction below.

[Sonnet In The Eyes] "It looks like I'll be inside your most beautiful dream for certain."

I'm not going to do line quotes here because it's too long LOL but in this date, Spring Morning, they end up having a conversation about dreams and, one time when Xu Mo dozed off in his lab, he dreamed that he was a fish.

His surroundings were dark and he couldn't see the state of the water but, with a thought, he could swim a long distance. When he opened his mouth, only bubbles would come out. When he raised his head, he would see the light filtering through the waves. Sometimes, he would hear the chirps of birds transmitted through surface of the lake.

He knew he was dreaming, because he's a light sleeper, but he still observed how the wind seemed to blow above the lake and that it was the height of summer. Maybe, when it got dark, he'd be able to see the stars and fireflies. He thought about asking another fish for directions but he couldn't find anyone around him. Then he woke up.

At that time, he had run into problems in his work and, even after half a year, there was no progress. In his dream, he rashly thought that if he really was a fish then he wouldn't need to work. But, after he woke up, he suddenly had a flash of inspiration. Later, he concluded that this dream was able to let him relax a little, set his mind blank, and that's when he could get back to work.

Look at him tell MC about his dreams, reveal his struggles, and reveal his inner thoughts. He's telling her about the time when, even someone like him, met with difficulties and felt the urge to just throw it all out and give up. He's letting her into his world and that's love, baby!

Psst, don't forget about the water imagery with him being a fish.

[Flowers on the Path] "I thought it over a thousand times, and then there came a reply."

Xu Mo: Are you home already? I saw the photo you sent me.

MC: Mhm, I just got home.

Xu Mo: Lately, you've been sending me photos of clouds. Is there any special meaning behind them?

MC: Not really. I just wanted to share with Professor Xu, who is always cooped up in his lab, a good way to reduce stress.

Xu Mo: Oh? What is it?

MC: First, look at the picture.

Xu Mo: Mm, I'm looking.

MC: Then close your eyes and imagine yourself as that cloud. Tell me, what do you see?

Xu Mo: I seem... to only see pitch darkness?

MC: Pfff, I mean you can use your imagination. For example... what sights you see and what you feel.

Xu Mo: Alright, I see... a clear sky and bright sunlight. Sometimes... birds will fly past.

MC: Will they say hello to you?

Xu Mo: They'll slow down and roll around on me, frolicking.

MC: Haha, and then?

Xu Mo: And then I'll drift around leisurely like this until I see another cloud. Although it's our first meeting, I'll feel like I've known her since a long time ago.

MC: Maybe she feels the same way.

Xu Mo: So we'll click immediately and slowly lean against each other.

MC: Hahaha, as expected of our Professor Xu! Your imagination is so rich.

Xu Mo: This method really is effective and it can let me clear out my mind. After resting for a while, even my feelings are much calmer.

MC: Oh! Then Professor Xu will have two methods of relieving stress now.

Xu Mo: Two?

MC: Yup, during the day, you can look at the sky and imagine yourself as a free floating "cloud"; at night, in your dreams, you can be a "fish" swimming in the great sea with no restraints. Like this, regardless of whether it's day or night, you can say goodbye to your worries.

Xu Mo: Haha, I have to go up into the sky and then down into the water. Why do I feel like I'm even busier?

MC: Hahaha, that's true.

Xu Mo: However, compared to these, I have another method which I like even more.

MC: Oh? What is it?

Xu Mo: It's staying beside "another cloud" or "another fish". Even if we don't do anything, it can get rid of an entire day's worth of exhaustion and I'll be able to get a good rest. May I ask what she thinks about this method?

[Reducing Stress - Call]

Callbacks. I love PG's callbacks so much.

But, linking this back to everything, they're both exercising their imagination together and it shows their inner world more to each other. Not to mention, they literally bring back how he once dreamed about being a fish to escape the stress of his work.

Now, I'm changing gears again, but this time I want to talk about the physical world they're both in and how their different philosophies set them on opposite sides. I wrote about the [Use of Horror in Ch19 Study] and how, in that chapter, you can see her greatest fears manifested in what Ares does there, but also what she resolves herself to do.

They literally walk away from each other because, according to Xu Mo, their "destinations" were different from the very beginning.

However, when we get to Chapter 24...

MC: ... What if the future we both want is different? I might become your obstacle.

Xu Mo: Right now isn't the time to come to a conclusion.

Xu Mo: Reality will inevitably have pain. However, to run away from reality because of that will just lead to more regret.

Xu Mo: I'm certain the future you wish for will be beautiful and it'll be able to touch anyone's heart.

Xu Mo: You're going to take me to that sort of future. Right?

MC: ... Yes!

MC: But after the worlds become one, even if I fail then I won't be able to do things over again. If that happens...

Xu Mo: Everything will end.

Xu Mo: But that's the path you chose, right? I believe in your choice.

Xu Mo: This time, I'll follow behind you.

He had always been walking in front of me, but now he was entrusting himself to the choice I believed in.

I made my decision.

MC: Follow me closely then.

Xu Mo grabbed my hand and lightly swung it.

Xu Mo: Is this good?

My cheeks burned and I spoke incoherently.

MC: Then... don't ever let go!

Xu Mo: Mm, I'm holding on tightly.

He showed a gentle smile that was like the sunlight of spring.

Before I knew it, our fingers intertwined and it was like we exchanged a quiet promise.

I looked at our joined hands and something hot suddenly welled up in my heart.

In this immense space-time, there were countless obstacles stretched ahead of us. For a long time, we both walked with our backs to each other.

There were still unsolved mysteries between us, but now I felt like I could face anything.

This time it was my turn to pull his hand and run towards that spring without stopping.

That's love! This is love! He loves her so much!

From the beginning, Xu Mo and MC were people in different worlds (their innate nature and their philosophies) but, throughout their relationship, they both keep making efforts to understand each other and enter each other's inner worlds.

It literally culminates here in Xu Mo willing to set down his beliefs and follow hers. He's trusting in her vision of the future and that's basically a proposal from someone like him.

I literally don't have anything else to say without devolving into sappy poetry or romantic lines or something, but these two have laid their souls bare to each other and accepted every side of the other person, regardless of how alien, childish, vicious, ugly, or weird it can be. Literally, "If we want the rewards of being loved we have to submit to the mortifying ordeal of being known."

#love and producer #mlqc #mr love queen's choice #mlqc lucien #mlqc xu mo #love and produc(ing) meta

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1dcraftawards · 4 years

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October Author of the Month...

Drumroll please... our author of the month for October ended in a tie between three wonderfully talented authors!

@bopbopstyles @oh-honey-styles @stylishmuser

Congratulations to all three of these absolutely amazing girls! Check out our interviews with each of them below!

Author of the Month interview with @bopbopstyles !

Did you start writing fanfiction for One Direction, or was there another fandom that you wrote fanfiction for before this? The only fanfiction I’ve ever written has been 1D! I wrote Liam back in the day (oof) but now I’m a Harry girl - but I’ve been considering doing Niall at some point!

How old were you when you started writing fanfiction? I think I wrote some bits of fics back when I was probably 13 or so, but I wouldn’t really say I *wrote* fanfic at that time. I only started writing fanfic in January of this year, but started doing it a lot this summer.

What’s been your favorite fic that you’ve written to work on so far?100000% Rose Colored Glasses. I write historical fiction outside of my fanfic writing life, so RCG was the combination of all the things I love: history, Peaky Blinders, boxer!Harry, and as my agent calls them “cinnamon roll boys”.

Is there a fic that you really wanted to write, but you just never did? I have this idea for a time travel fic but haven’t decided if I want to take that idea and use it for a non-fanfic story or not yet, so I haven’t written it. It would definitely be a similar vein to RCG if I did write it though!

What’s your favorite trope to write? FRATBOY HARRY HOLDS MY HEART! (If you couldn’t tell by my multiple fratboy/college!harry fics lol) Also, friends to lovers. The pining. The character development. Ugh. I LOVE.

What’s your ideal space to write in? I can kind of write anywhere, but lately I’ve been writing the best in the evening on either my couch or at my desk! Just someplace that’s comfy and I can completely focus is the main thing. I’m also a bit coffee shop writer (but not when doing smut!!!!!!!)

What inspires you to write? Everything. Music is probably the biggest one, second would be television and movies. I love taking something creative someone else has done and twisting and reinventing it. But also things I see, people I know, my own experiences, art -- everything. (Bad For Me is literally based on my best friend, for example.)

Do you typically like to listen to music when you write? If so, what do you listen to? ALWAYS. I’m genuinely always listening to music, and it influences my mood and my writing, so it’ll change depending on the project and the scene. I’ve had playlists for some of my work, but a lot of times it’ll be some moody or lovey playlists I have, other times I’ll just listen to an album I’m loving on repeat. Completely depends! For Elevated Surfaces, for example, it was mostly written to frat party music because that’s where the story was set. You can check out my Spotify here if you want to see some of what I listen to!

Do you have any plans for any future fic ideas you’d like to pursue?I’ve been dying to write my Jane Austen series but haven’t gotten the time yet! It’ll take a while, so I’ve been putting it off, but I reaaalllyyyy want to do it at some point. There’s a couple others, but that’s one I really want to do at some point.

Do you have any advice for other writers in the fandom? Read, read, READ. That’s my advice for writers in general. Read widely (across genres, age groups, etc) and read critically! A lot of what I learned about how to write has come from analyzing books I read. I used to review books, actually, and it has definitely helped form how I write. I think for fan fiction specifically, though, I think a lot of people have a tendency to struggle with feeling pressured to write or rushed or judged for what they write. It’s definitely the result of the way we consume fan fiction, but I also think that it’s helpful to think about why you’re writing. For me personally, I write because it just genuinely brings me immense amounts of joy and I like sharing that with people. Writing for yourself takes a lot of the pressure off, I’ve found. It’s when you start writing for others that it can turn into a more difficult place. So: try to write for yourself first, before others!

How long does it normally take you, idea to posting, to post a fic?This completely depends on the fic! Once I get an idea I can write it pretty quickly, so I can churn out content quickly if I have the time. However, my pieces are long (most are in the 15-30k mark) which usually will take me a few days. Usually I’d say somewhere in the ballpark of like 10-20 hours total per one shot, but completely depends. Multi-chapter definitely take longer!Right now, for example, I haven’t written fanfiction in two weeks because I’m working on other projects. It really is dependent on what else I have going on in my life, because I also work full-time now, and so my posting has definitely declined in the past two months.

Is there a schedule you follow in terms of when you write? Or are you more impulsive and just write where and when you can? 100% impulsive, but mostly I write in the evenings and on weekends (aka when I’m not working). But no specific schedule -- I think if I schedule it then it takes some of the fun out of it.

What is one thing you wish you would’ve known before you started writing? How much FUN it is! I genuinely adore writing fanfiction and have made so many amazing friends through it. I wish I’d started earlier, in some ways.

What do you prefer writing, multi-chaptered fics or one shots? One shots for SURE. I don’t really plan on doing multi-chaptered again for a while, actually. Partly because it’s just more work, but also because it prolongs the wait for people to read it, and part of why I love fanfiction is the immediate gratification you get from it.

What was your favorite scene to write in “The Only Exception”?OOOOOH. I loved the early scenes when they were still getting to know one another. I’d say probably the scene from Harry’s release party and their emotional conversation after (from Ch.3) were really fun to write because they were so vulnerable. Also their fights. LOVED writing their fights. The Dunkirk premiere from Ch.3 and 4? One of my favorites. So probably the entirety of Ch. 3, I guess!

What is one moment from “Rose Colored Glasses” that you never got to write but wanted to? I struggled SO MUCH with their reunion scene. I re-wrote it like twice and played with a couple of different ways it was going to go, before settling on the final result. I had this one concept, though, where Cicely was going to ride her horse into Birmingham and Harry was going to be called to the stables to pick her up, and Cicely was going to just be so happy and excited to see him and Harry would be so overwhelmed he wouldn’t care about what his friends saw and would just be so tender with her.

What scenes/scenarios are most fun for you to write? I adore writing pining. The pining in Good Together is probably my favorite I’ve done -- the photo shoot scene? *collapses* I also love banter, which was one of the reasons Behind the Bar will always hold a special place in my heart.

Some readers are wary of leaving feedback because they're unsure how the writer will take it, how do you personally like to receive feedback? Do you want to be critiqued, or would you like to just know if they did or didn't enjoy what they've read? Feedback is literally what I thrive on. I’m in constant need of validation, to be honest, so please tell me when you like what I write! I love it! As far as types of feedback, I think that for my fanfiction, I’m not really posting it to get critiqued. Personally, it doesn’t help my writing in any way, because I’m writing for myself more than for others -- their enjoyment is just an additional plus. So I take critiques in kind of an “okay?” sort of way. It just doesn’t really affect me. I think the other thing about critiques (sorry I’m going off on this question lol) is that you don’t have to take them. I have people in my life whose opinions I trust and those are the people I want to critique my writing. The one caveat here is if my writing is offensive in any way. In that case, I want to be told so that I can fix it, learn from it, and make my future writing better. I will also say that I think part of it is that my fanfiction isn’t really the writing I’m the proudest of. I write outside of fanfiction, have an agent, etc. and so that part of my life is definitely what I care more about. For those projects, I desperately seek critiques, but from people whose opinions I trust!

Is writing a hobby or do you have aspirations of writing professionally outside of fanfiction? Writing professionally is the dream for me! My agent and I put my last project on submission but it wasn’t picked up, so I’m working on something new right now. Hopefully that will end up getting published, but we’ll see!

And finally, What's your purpose for writing? What do you hope to accomplish? I hope that my writing brings people joy and helps them learn something, whether that be about themselves or the world. Books are what helped me learn about the world and have brought me such happiness over the years, so I hope that mine can do the same.

Author of the Month interview with @oh-honey-styles !

Did you start writing fanfiction for One Direction, or was there another fandom that you wrote fanfiction for before this? Just for Harry! He’s that obnoxiously endearing, isn’t he?

How old were you when you started writing fanfiction?Okay okay, I guess I wrote something that resembled fanfiction (non-Harry) when I was fifteen or sixteen. That was all extremely idealistic cringy teenage angst that will live under a rock for eternity. But as far as Harry fanfiction, it was about a year ago when I started ‘Met Your Match’.

What’s been your favorite fic you’ve written to work on so far? My personal favorite is ‘January in Japan’. It was the first time I really dreamt up and developed my OFCs. Between Harry’s healing from heartbreak storyline, as well as Stella’s strong, feisty personality, all mixed together against the backdrop of Japan. The entire vibe was, and still is, so special to me. Plus, Japan!H is something else - peak boyfriend material.

Is there a fic that you really wanted to write, but you just never did?I mean, sure, there are always ideas floating around. But nothing that’s really kept nagging at me.

What’s your favorite trope to write? Fluffy mutual pining between strangers/friends to lovers with a tiny dash of angst.

What’s your ideal space to write in? I don’t really have an ideal space! But I will say, I’ve found that writing tends to really flow during AM hours. I’ve written most of my stories laying in bed, in the dark, between the hours of midnight and 4AM.

What inspires you to write? That bloke Harry Styles is the most endearing menace, so he’s generally my number one inspiration. But I also have a few bad ass women that inspire me more than they’ll ever know. They are my ride-or-die encouragement whose writing and brilliant ideas continuously motivate me to be a better writer.

Do you typically like to listen to music when you write? If so, what do you listen to?This is probably an unpopular opinion, but I don’t! I do have artists/songs that inspire my stories (for example, The Sugarhill Gang for ‘Hazy’ and ‘Rise Up’ by Andra Day for ‘Black & Blue’). But for the most part, I love silence while writing.

Do you have any plans for any future fic ideas you’d like to pursue?At the moment I’m only focused on ‘Collide’. However, it really doesn’t take long for the bug to bite!

Do you have any advice for other writers in the fandom?Well, since I started writing, I’ve been extremely lucky to have amazing advice poured into me by some of the most phenomenal writers in the fandom. So I guess one thing I would pass along is that writing fic is meant to be fun! Continue to write as long as you’re truly, truly loving it. If you’re not having fun writing or enjoying the process, step away and circle back during another season in life. When fic becomes a stress or a burden, it’s time to step away.

What is your writing process like?Honestly? (insert cringe face) It’s a hot mess. I don’t typically do outlines and if I do, they’re always changing. I usually write raw dialogue first and then add in the rest. Sometimes I’ll write a scene out from beginning to end, but I’m generally filling in the gaps. I always keep a doc open on my phone for ideas that pop into my head throughout the day (a conversation or a visual). And then once a scene is completed, I send it off to my betas and they’re the ones who let me know if I’m completely off my rocker or not.

Is there a schedule you follow in terms of when you write? Or are you more impulsive and just write where and when you can?100% impulsive. I write and post when inspiration hits and when life allows it.

What is one thing you wish you would’ve known before you started writing? That once you start, you can’t stop. The writing bug is fucking relentless.

What do you prefer writing, multi-chaptered fics or one shots?All of the above! Multi-chapter fics are nice, having the freedom to really develop your characters as well as elaborate on a concept. But they’re definitely exhausting. And one-shots are such a good way to bust out an idea with no strings attached. I really enjoy writing both.

What has been your favorite scene to write so far in “Collide”?‘The Wedding’ has been my favorite scene in ‘Collide’ so far. I absolutely adored writing the initial nervous attraction between Harry and Franki. It’s really the initial point in the story where they start to realize that there may actually be deeper feelings there on both sides. Plus, who doesn’t love a nervous, flirty Harry?

What is one moment from “Met Your Match” that you never got to write but want to?Oh wow. ‘Met Your Match’ rounded out pretty well, but I guess I had one moment in mind that I never wrote. It was basically a scene where Harry and Kate are in LA on their way to a BBQ at Niall’s house. One way or another it comes out that Niall was Kate’s favorite during the 1D era. The scene would have included loads of teasing and maybe a tinge of jealous Harry.

What inspired you to write “Collide”? How did you come up with the story idea?The whole concept of ‘Collide’ came about when quarantine happened and the world went into lockdown. With there being hardly any new content, we were all basically just reblogging old Harry posts. So each part is inspired by and based off of a past Harry photo/event etc. It's been really fun to tie them all together in one story.

Some readers are wary of leaving feedback because they're unsure how the writer will take it, how do you personally like to receive feedback? Do you want to be critiqued, or would you like to just know if they did or didn't enjoy what they've read? Every writer loves feedback. Honestly, feedback is the most incredible gift a reader could give a writer. Pressing ‘post’ on your own blood, sweat and tears is one of the most nauseatingly nerve wracking things ever, so to be acknowledged for it (through messages and sharing) is priceless. As far as a critique goes, there’s a fine line. Personally, if there’s something I’m writing that’s offensive or off putting, I absolutely want to know (in a positive, uplifting, non-anon-asshole way). But if my story’s just not their cup of tea, I’d rather they move along to the next fic out there.

Is writing a hobby or do you have aspirations of writing professionally outside of fanfiction?Only a hobby!

And finally, What's your purpose for writing? What do you hope to accomplish? My purpose in everything I write is to provide a little escape for myself and my readers from this crazy world. Most, if not all, of my stories are meant to be lighthearted and fun - a decent way to step out of yourself for a short moment.

Author of the Month interview with @stylishmuser !

Did you start writing fanfiction for One Direction, or was there another fandom that you wrote fanfiction for before this?The first ever fanfic I wrote was actually for Gossip Girl. It was horribly written, but I had so much fun. After that I wrote Harry Potter fanfiction for about a year, and then I started getting into 1D, and I don’t imagine I’ll ever write for another fandom.

How old were you when you started writing fanfiction? I think I was a sophomore in high school, so… 16, maybe?

What’s been your favorite fic that you’ve written to work on so far?Oh this is hard to answer, to be honest. It probably sounds cliche but I’ve had a favorite aspect in every one of my fics. I think Timeless will always have a special place in my heart, but I have a favorite thing each one of them.

Is there a fic that you really wanted to write, but you just never did?Oh hmmm I think there are a lot of tropes I want to try my hand at, but I don’t like writing a story that’s been done a million times before, so it’s kind of finding an aspect or angle to it to make it different.

What’s your favorite trope to write? Idk if it’s a trope but, angst with a happy ending!

What’s your ideal space to write in? Honestly, I can write almost anywhere. It just needs to be quiet. I like to write in my living room or at the kitchen counter at like 2 am when everyone else is asleep.

What inspires you to write? I really just like to tell stories. I think words kind of have this power to them. I also am inspired by Harry and Niall, their lifestyles/music/careers, and telling stories about/for WOC. When I was growing up, I always thought that people like me didn’t really deserve love stories. So I guess it’s kind of destroying that notion that inspires me too!

Do you typically like to listen to music when you write? If so, what do you listen to? I used to, actually. That first fic I ever wrote was fueled by listening to Mind of Mine on repeat haha. Now I like the quiet, but sometimes if I’m stuck I’ll listen to the playlist for whatever story I’m writing.

Do you have any plans for any future fic ideas you’d like to pursue? This made me laugh because I have four in my mind at any given time. You’ll have to wait and see what they are!

What is your writing process like? It goes something like this: vague idea > random scene ideas that bug me into writing it > visuals > outline > actually writing it.

Do you prefer Au or OU? I prefer OU because I like writing about the music aspect of the boys’ lives. AU is fun too, but it’s a lot more work in my opinion. It needs to be a specific idea or trope or I’ll just go with OU.

Is there a schedule you follow in terms of when you write? Or are you more impulsive and just write where and when you can? I try to keep myself to some sort of schedule, like 1000 words a night or 1 chapter per weekend or I get off track.

What is one thing you wish you would’ve known before you started writing? Oh hmm… I think I would go back and tell myself that it’s okay to want to write WOC characters and it doesn’t matter who likes it, or who doesn’t, or how many notes you get. I think it’s really easy for writers — no matter what they write — to feel like they aren’t living up to whatever popularity standards are going on in their fandom, but at the end of the day it’s about what YOU love to write about. That’s what makes a good story, in my opinion, and as a reader you can tell when an author is really putting their heart into something, and that’s kind of inspiring.

What do you prefer writing, multi-chaptered fics or one shots? Multi chapter. I freak out about one shots now because they end up being 15 or 20k words anyway when I write them haha!

What has been your favorite scene to write so far in “Rumor Has It”? I think my favorite scene from that story was either their first kiss, the morning after they get intimate for the first time, or the scene where Ishika comes clean to Harry about how she feels/why she lied. I remember those three scenes came so clearly to me, I was just stabbing away at my keyboard like a cartoon.

You have such complex characters that readers adore, do you have any advice on planning well written and planned characters? AH that is a very nice thing for you to say! Thank you! I like to think of characters in terms of fatal flaws. It sounds weird but like: What makes your character cry? What keeps them up at night? What makes them happy, or mad? What makes them, them? That’s kind of how I approach it. It’s kind of finding a balance of those characteristics and ‘why are you so frustrating I want to THUMP you’ and ‘I adore them, let’s protect them at all costs.’

What inspired you to write “Kiss and Cry”? How did you come up with the story idea? So I watched this show called “Spinning Out” on Netflix and kind of geeked out about figure skating. I knew nothing about it, which is kind of what got me thinking, this would be cool to learn about and writing for me is the best way to learn. At first I was like, nobody cares about a figure skating fic, and then I was like: good, write it. So here we are!

Some readers are wary of leaving feedback because they're unsure how the writer will take it, how do you personally like to receive feedback? Do you want to be critiqued, or would you like to just know if they did or didn't enjoy what they've read? I think feedback is a really personal thing, but there’s a really fine line (haha) approaching it. I really think constructive criticism is an important part of feedback — but it’s often done very poorly. There is a big difference between pointing out to an author what they could’ve done better, or even asking why they wrote something the way they did (because I promise you, they did it the way they did for a reason), and simply telling them they are either a bad writer, have poorly written something, or something worse because god knows we’ve all gotten it lmao. For me, I don’t mind either. But if you’re going to criticize my writing, do it one on one, not on anon where you can add a bite to your words. Feedback is kind of a two way conversation, and I think that’s often forgotten about — especially on Tumblr. And it’s very, very obvious when people do want to act unkind, and say unkind things behind the anon veil on purpose. It’s ok not to like the way someone wrote something, but it’s not ok to be vicious about it, ESPECIALLY on anon. That just makes you a coward. I guess my rule of thumb is: Is what you’re typing out going to hurt the person on the other end? Is it worth it to do that? Or can you reword it in a way that starts a conversation instead of bullying someone for putting their work out there, something that’s vulnerable no matter how many times you do it. But, this is just how I feel. Every writer is different (and valid!)

Is writing a hobby or do you have aspirations of writing professionally outside of fanfiction? I’d love to write professionally one day! We’ll see what happens. I think whether it happens or not, I just love it so much, I’ll do it for a long time because it’s a big part of who I am.

And finally, What's your purpose for writing? What do you hope to accomplish? My purpose of writing… that’s so philosophical. I guess, I honestly just like to tell stories that are important to me, and remind people that life sucks but it’s also pretty damn good at times too. I hope to keep making myself happy writing whatever it is I’m writing, and challenge myself to try my hand at stuff that’s daunting, and hopefully people like what I’m doing and if not, that’s ok, because I do! And to remember that’s my real purpose for writing, it’s never been a numbers game or keeping score, it’s been about telling stories that I love crafting.

#author of the month #aom #October 2020 #aomoctober2020

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hms-chill · 4 years

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Hi! It's the Henry whump anon again ^^; Thanks so much for your response ;u; Ah, from the h/c prompts I really liked either 1 or 50 (but 3, 47, 32 are also fun if you don't like those two!!) I love injury/sickness whump the best but emotional is also fine if you're more inspired for that. ... i feel like I'm placing one of those complicated coffee orders and I feel bad about it I'm sorry! Ofc these are just suggestions, no pressure, I'd read anything of yours tbh! ^ω^ Thank you for your time!

Hello! In reference to your coffee order analogy, have you ever shown up at a place like “okay so I have a $10 gift card, what’s the most I can get with that?” and had a disillusioned cashier excitedly help you get like... $9.99 of junk food and it feels like you’re part of a two-woman conspiracy to undermine Chick-Fil-A by getting as much free food as possible? Just me? Anyway that’s how I felt writing this. I had another request for number one, so I only got 50, 3, 47, and 32 in, but I was proud of that.

50. “I can’t believe I let this happen.”

3. “Get away from me!”

47. “You know I would never hurt you.”

32. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

Alex is late. Again. Normally it wouldn’t bother him too much; most of the people in his life have just learned to let it slide when he’s slipping into the back of a lecture or coming into a meeting in progress in a bit of a panic. But, well. This is different. This is Henry. It’s Henry and the shelter, and he’d promised to be there early to help set up, but now he’ll be lucky to be on time, and no matter how much he blames his professors or the MTA or anyone else, he knows it’s his own fault. He’d forgotten to set an alarm to make himself stop working, and he’d forgotten to watch the clock or just be on top of things. But he didn’t, and now he’s let Henry down again, and he only has himself to blame, and he feels awful.

Henry’s already on stage when Alex arrives, speaking about the importance of the youth shelter and the services it provides to a crowd who are loving it. Alex settles in, leaning against a post in the wings to listen. He loves seeing Henry like this. He’s so beautifully confident, so overwhelmingly sure of what he’s doing, so clearly passionate about the shelter. And Alex loves him so much. He’s such an amazing person, and Alex is so wrapped up in watching him shine that he doesn’t pay attention to anything else. He doesn’t hear the man coming up behind him, doesn’t realize he’s in trouble before he hears Cash shout at him to duck. He does without hesitation, dropping to the floor as a gunshot goes off above him. Henry flinches forward a bit, and people start to scream, but that doesn’t cover the sound of a second gunshot going off over Alex’s head. At that one, Henry lets out a shout, pressing a hand to his side even as he’s urging people to stay calm and not shove each other. Even as Alex watches his legs give out, Henry is clinging to the podium and begging people to look out for each other as he crumples to the ground. Alex is moving before he’s even sure what’s happening, before he can process anything. He doesn’t care, he just needs--

His eyes meet Henry’s, and in a voice far too calm for the situation, Henry says, “Alex, get away from me.”

Alex freezes in his tracks, and he watches as Henry’s eyes close, watches as Amy gets to him and picks him up, his head flopping loosely back as she carries his limp body off stage. Alex is vaguely aware of people moving around him, of shouting and running, but he can’t stop staring at the puddle of Henry’s blood at the foot of the podium. It’s a black stage, too solid to let anything soak into it. So the blood sits on the surface, reflecting the sunlight far too cheerily as it slowly dries into a slightly darker patch of stage.

Before it’s dried completely, there’s a hand on his shoulder, and Cash is getting him up and into a car. Someone’s in the driver’s seat, and Cash sits in the back with Alex. The minute the door is closed behind them, the pull away, and Cash looks Alex in the eye to ask, “are you hurt?”

Alex shakes his head automatically. After a moment, Cash pulls him in for a hug, and a choked sob claws its way out of Alex’s throat.

“I... he told me to--” he can’t repeat it. It’s been playing on repeat in his mind ever since. He can’t let himself think about what might be happening to Henry, refuses to allow himself to even imagine that Henry might not recover, so spiralling about being told to go away is somehow the safest, sanest option here.

“He wanted you safe,” Cash says. And that makes sense, but Cash hadn’t seen Henry’s face. He doesn’t know how much this event meant to Henry, how important it was that Alex was there to support him.

Cash doesn’t know that they’d talked about the possibility of Alex turning up late. He hadn’t been there when Alex asked how important he really was to the success of the event, and how at dinner Henry had said it didn’t matter. Cash wasn’t there in bed the night before, when Alex called Henry’s bluff, and when Henry explained how he’s always felt like he had to face things like this by himself, but having Alex there makes it easier. Cash doesn’t know that having Alex nearby before an event calms Henry down enough that he can actually focus on the event, or that Alex had listened, then taken Henry’s hand and said, “why did you ever tell me I could miss things? Why didn’t you tell me all this? I’ll be there early, because I love you, I swear.”

Cash doesn’t know how badly he’d let Henry down today, and he doesn’t know how much Alex had risked just to get there late and let Henry down anyway. He doesn’t know that Alex had gotten into a subway car just as it was leaving the station, knowing that his security team would have to wait six minutes for the next one, doesn’t know that Alex had booked it to the venue instead of waiting for them like he was supposed to. Cash had been there on time, helping get things set up and probably doing Alex’s job of looking after Henry. He can’t know.

“I... it’s my fault. I was running late, so I was in a rush and I lost my team, and I... I must have picked up a tail. I forgot to watch the time. It’s all my fault, and now...”

“It’s not. It’s not your fault,” Cash says, hugging him closer. “You didn’t make him trail you, you didn’t make him want to hurt you. You didn’t let him get close enough to shoot. That... none of that was your fault. But we’re going to be at the hospital soon. Amy’s beat us here, so Henry’s in surgery. Are you alright to go into a waiting room, or would you rather drive around for a bit to calm down?”

“No, we... can we go in?” Cash nods, and when they pull up outside, he guides Alex into a waiting room. Alex processes vaguely that he’s shaking. Cash says something about his family being on their way, but it’ll take some time before they can get here.

Shaan appears, and he looks as disheveled as Alex feels. Well, the top button of his shirt is unbuttoned and he has at least four hairs out of place, but for Shaan, that’s got to be the equivalent to Alex’s shaking hands and bouncing knee. He comes to sit next to Alex, and he says it’ll be alright, but Alex can’t imagine how he knows that.

Alex has no idea how long they sit there. At some point, he tries to make a list:

Henry told him to go away.

Henry has just been shot.

The shooter was clearly coming for Alex, and he clearly followed Alex to the event, where he then shot Henry.

Henry is currently in surgery, because he was shot, because Alex was running late and ditched his security and let a shooter tail him to an event.

“Get away from me” might be the last thing Henry ever says to him.

He stops trying to count after that. He paces instead, then gives up on that, too. Cash brings lunch, but he’s too worried to eat. He wants to search the hospital for Henry, wants to shake someone into telling him something, but that won’t do any good.

A million lifetimes later, he’s mid-pace when Cash’s hand lands on his shoulder, pulling him out of his head.

“He’s out of surgery. It’s going to take some time, but the doctor expects him to make a full recovery.”

For the second time today, Alex hugs Cash, hard. Cash hugs him back, then says, “He’s not awake yet, but we can go in if you’re ready.”

And with that, all of Alex’s other fears come crashing back into him. Henry’d said he should go away. He’d messed up. He was late, despite having promised he’d be there early to help. He’d brought a tail to the event, and he could have killed someone. It’s his fault any of this happened. And Henry had told him to get away. Maybe, Henry doesn’t want to see him anymore.

“I... maybe Shaan, but I... I’m not sure he wants me,” Alex says finally, and he knows his hands are shaking, and he realizes that maybe he’s on the verge of a panic attack, and maybe he’s been on the verge of a panic attack for a long time. Cash just hugs him, and keeps him upright when he body wants to fall into a puddle of fear on the floor of the waiting room. And Alex plants his face into Cash’s chest and tries to take deep breaths, tries not to focus on the fact that Henry might hate him, tries to ignore the fact that any choice he makes now could only make everything worse.

He tries very, very hard to make a list. And he comes up with nothing.

He’s not sure how long it takes him to process that there’s a hand on his shoulder, but he turns just enough to see Shaan attached to it.

“He’ll want to see you,” Shaan says simply, and his tone is indisputable. So Alex nods, and they go to Henry’s room, and Alex breaks into tears again at the sight of Henry, pale as a sheet and lying on the hospital bed. Cash hugs him, and after a moment, Alex is able to pull away and let Shaan convince him that he really does deserve to sit down next to Henry’s bed. He takes Henry’s hand, but then that feels like too much and he puts it down. He’s not even sure Henry wants him here.

But if Henry does want him, then will he be hurt if Alex isn’t holding his hand? Will it make him think Alex doesn’t care? He’s reaching for the hand again when it moves, and Alex pulls back on instinct.

“H-- Henry?” His voice is shakier than he wants it to be. He’s not sure what to do with his hands, and he’s aware that his hands are a stupid thing to be worried about right now, but he’s not sure how to make himself worry about something more important.

Henry’s head turns, and his eyes are on Alex, and Alex can’t breathe. Henry’s eyes go wide, and he’s upset. Alex feels his heart plummet from the lump in his throat to the acid in his stomach.

“I... Shaan said you’d want me here; I told them you said I should go away and you wouldn’t want me, but he.. he said-- I’m sorry. I knew you wouldn’t want to see me, I can’t believe I let this happen; I... I’ll go.”

“Alex, what?” Henry’s voice is a bit hoarse, but it’s enough to send a dagger through Alex’s stomach.

“You... you told me to get away, and I didn’t... I’m sorry. This is my fault; it’s my fault you were hurt, and I--” Henry takes his hand, and Alex’s mouth stops working. Apparently, he’d decided that the right place to put his hand was the side of Henry’s bed, and Henry’s taken it and started rubbing little circles in the back of it. Alex looks up at him, and he lets himself hope, maybe for the first time since Henry woke up.

“I never meant... sweetheart, I’m sorry. I... when we were growing up, they taught us to stay away from each other if anything like this happened so that we wouldn’t be a big target, and I... I’m sorry.” Henry tries to push himself up, then grimaces and says, “come here, would you? I need to hug you, but my bloody stitches won’t let me up.”

Alex is more than happy to oblige, pulling Henry into a careful hug. Henry hugs him back so tightly Alex is worried that he’ll pull his stitches anyway.

“I’m sorry. You know I’d never hurt you, not on purpose. I’d never ask you to leave if it weren’t for your own good. I love you far, far too much for that.”

And if that makes Alex cry again, well, it’s been a long day. He deserves a good cry, and he deserves to climb into bed with his boyfriend so that Henry can hold him close and smooth out his hair and promise that things will be alright. He’d tried to protest, or to apologize, but Henry refused to hear any of it. So instead, Alex just lets himself be held close, drifting off to sleep with the confidence that Henry is safe and that he is loved.

#ask and answer #rwrb prompt #rwrb ficlet #rwrb #red white and royal blue #rwrb angst #FirstPrince #alex claremont diaz #henry fox mountchristen windsor x alex claremont diaz #henry fox mountchristen windsor

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beccarooni · 4 years

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Hi! I am a shy but keen followers of yours. Just a few words to tell you just how much I enjoy your works and to send you my most heartfelt thanks for them. I know I have no right to demand more of your generous efforts, but please take heart and keep going, we really appreciate It! As to what I would like to read, this is an easy one: more Thor h/c, pretty please?

(A.N: Hey, thank you so much for suggesting this! I’m sorry it took me so long to get around to it, but I hope this is ok! It’s an alternate take on the ending of Age of Ultron - inspired by A Long Way Down by TDFawkes on ao3.)

Hulk didn’t think he truly had his mind made up about the whole ‘leaving earth behind’ thing until the sky began to fall. Until the rocks and rubble began to create waves in an otherwise still ocean, until the lasers and lightning and sparks flew - a morbid painting of light across the afternoon sky.

It wasn’t that he hadn’t considered the idea before - the idea of being unnatural. He knew he was, and he was fine with that. Banner could hate him, Earth could hate him - he didn’t care. He didn’t come out often enough to care about these people - at least, that’s what he told himself. Part of him maybe knew that was a lie, but that was a part he could blame on Bruce. The sentimental side.

The human side.

He liked the team, that wasn��t the problem. At least, not exactly. But it seemed that he only liked the team - or, they only liked him - when he could be of use. When it was smokey and bloody and the battleground unfurled below their feet. Outside of that, they weren’t exactly pleased to see him the rare times he reared his head.

Always pleased to see Banner, though.

And that was why he had stayed.

Because Banner, like it or not, had a life here. He had friends, he shared a multibillion dollar laboratory with Tony Stark, he ate lunch with Black Widow, he got interplanetary selfies from the God of Thunder. Hulk might not have been missed from the Earth, but it had gotten to the point where Bruce Banner was a loss that many wouldn’t be able to take.

Until Johannesburg. And then it seemed that the years of cultivating a life, the years of peace, of friendship - it didn’t seem to matter. People wanted both of them dead - again. Natasha Romanoff had pushed Bruce off of a ledge, Sokovians ran and the sky burned, and Hulk made up his mind.

He could leave this place. All of it.

Protecting Banner used to mean staying with the team. But now, it seemed like it was starting to mean leaving it.

Part of him was sad - maybe. Part of him was relieved. Part of him was worried about how Banner would react to all of this , but he was surprised to note that he wasn’t exactly angry. He was...accepting. This was the way their world ended - with fire, and metal, and one last victory and then he would leave.

But, as per the usual, their world had different plans for them.

He’d turned away from the wreckage of the city, towards where the quin-jet lay idle, and had been so close to leaving it all behind - when something caught his eye.

A streak of crimson, a flash of gold, a hammer falling from a strong grasp turned limp.

Thor had fallen into the water , and for a few moments, Hulk teetered on the edge of oblivion. Because the quin-jet was there, it was right behind him, he was free. He was close to knowing what freedom meant, and surely someone would show up and haul Thor out of the water without needing him.

Stark would fly into the water, or Cap, or maybe strands of red magic would lift the demi-god from the oceans grasp - whoever. It didn’t matter, someone would save him. Someone that wasn’t him.

But no one came.

He paused, idly kicking at the floor and watching the dust rise and swirl in the wind, waiting for the water to break. The Demigod wasn’t helpless, he knew how to swim. He could get out by himself. He didn’t need Hulk, no one did.

He counted to ten six times. A minute. A minute without Thor breaking the surface, without someone flying in to save him, without him saving himself.

Hulk didn’t know how to feel about the God of Thunder, not really. He didn’t think anyone on the team did. Because, Thor could drink as many cups of coffee as he pleased, eat as many slices of pizza or watch as many soap-operas on the TV - but that wouldn’t make him human. He didn’t show up all that often - aside from when there was a fight, and people were cautious around him and the strength he wielded.

In his way, he was a little bit too much like Hulk, and that made Hulk nervous. They didn’t talk about their shared experiences much. Sure, Thor seemed happy when he was fighting alongside him, but he seemed happy with everyone.

It wasn’t fair that Thor could be so similar to him, but so different. Could get along with people, could be stopped for photographs in the street, could get smiles from Bruce instead of contempt.

And that was the crux of it all, really. Why he was hesitating to dive in, but still hesitating to leave, still waiting on the cliffside, kicking at rocks.

Bruce liked Thor. Thor liked Bruce. They were two sides of an equation, two planets orbiting around a sun. They played their games, dancing around the topic, keeping their distances - but Hulk knew Bruce.

Hulk was supposed to protect Bruce. And if the last thing Bruce saw of Earth was someone he liked, plummeting into the ocean, and knowing that Hulk didn’t try to save him…

That wasn’t protecting.

The oceans scared Hulk, in a way that he didn’t like to admit. They were too vast, too deep, too unknown and dark and uncertain. Bruce liked them. The Doctor liked discovery, peering into the voids of space and sea with a lantern to cast away the shadows. He’d always had a knack for it, for discovery. For reaching into the depths of knowledge and pulling something out - an idea, a theory, a life changing piece of whatever he was doing for whoever he was doing it for.

Hulk took a breath, plunging into the water, the fire and brimstone of the world above fading into the background as his hands began to search.

He didn’t know what Thor thought of the oceans, but he knew that this most likely wasn’t something the Demigod would enjoy. If Thor was anything like him, then he would like warmth. The crushing pressure and the falling debris and the cold, cold currents - they weren’t him. They weren’t them.

A small nagging feeling of fear began to claw at Hulk’s chest as his hands continued to grab blindly, and find nothing. Left in the cold for too long, a fire would extinguish. A fact from Bruce hovered in his mind - for a flame to live, it needed oxygen, fuel, and heat. A 3 bit recipe for life, drawn up in a neat whiteboard triangle. Thor needed heat. Thor needed him, and if he couldn’t find him, then something was going to happen.

One of the few embers that could hope to match Hulk’s fire would be gone.

One of the few people that still cared enough to backtrack and stumble over post-battle comforts would be gone.

Thor would be gone. Lost and alone in the deep, unable to come home. An asteroid, crashing to earth, unable to return to its place among the star-speckled skies.

Hulk’s lungs were beginning to burn, when his hand met something familiar. Smooth fabric, weighed down by the water, but the bright red still apparent enough to cut through the blue of the sea. And attached to its tail, was the comet itself.

Blue eyes closed, blond hair weightless, and golden skin pale under what little sunlight reached them here - but there.

He wrapped his arms tight around the Demigods middle, tucking him closely to his side, and began to kick. The debris was still falling, but it was no match for his strength. Piles of concrete and half-broken ultron bots sank past him, and he continued to rise. Up towards the sun. Up towards the heat, the land, the air and the sky and somewhere closer to home.

Hulk broke the surface, roaring with effort as he finally landed onto the shore, still cradling his star in his arms.

He knelt down, slowly, depositing Thor on the ground as best as he could - hovering over him to try and gauge some sense of life.

Thor’s skin was cold against his fingertip. And he couldn’t exactly tell beneath the thick layers of armour, but it didn’t seem like he was breathing.

Hulk bent a little closer, lifting the still-sparking communicator from below the Demigod’s ear.

“Thor...Ultron…-Read me?”

Garbled words spilled out of the device, in a voice that sounded a little like the Captain - but it was too crackly for Hulk to be able to find something recognisable.

“West of crater,” Hulk grumbled, cradling the electronic in his palm. “Come get Blondie.”

“Hulk? Is everything-?”

“Come get Blondie.” He repeated, tossing the device to the ground, and once again bending over the unconscious form below him.

Something stirred in the back of his mind. He wasn’t exactly sure what it was, but he knew how to listen to instructions by now. Knowledge he didn’t remember acquiring lifted his hand, and he pressed it with some force against Thor’s chest.

Once. Twice. Three times.

Three turned to ten and ten turned to thirty and suddenly, the sky above him split open. A low grumble of thunder answered his call, and Thor twisted below him, hacking coughs spraying water onto the concrete below, one armour-clad hand flailing out and finding a comforting grip against Hulk’s arm.

He allowed his hand to rest against Thor’s shoulder blades for just a few seconds, turning his gaze towards the skies.

The quin-jet was moving, and his window was closing. Thor was safe - and that could be his ticket. He’d done something nice for Banner, and now, it was time for something nice for him. His last action here had been something good, and maybe that would be enough to placate Bruce when he next surfaced.

Maybe.

But probably not.

Hulk got to his feet, gently prying Thor’s hand from his wrist, setting it carefully onto the ground.

He didn’t know where he was going to go, out in the stars, but he hoped it was somewhere warm. Somewhere near a star, a sun. Somewhere where a comet could find them, someday.

#age of ultron #marvel #thorhulk #hulk #fic #ficlet #thorbruce #asks #request #thunderscience #gammahammer #Thor #bruce banner

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onlycags · 4 years

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Spank Me | Çağlar Söyüncü

This post was *cringe* inspired by Fifty Shades, but, unlike he-who-shall-not-be-named-abusive-asshat-Christian-Grey, our baby actually knows what aftercare is and isn’t a dick.

Word Count: 2,032 Rating: NC-17 Description: I think the title says it all ;)

Enjoy!

- - -

It started out innocently enough. You had put on Fifty Shades of Grey because you were bored and wanted a laugh. It was pure coincidence that Çağlar had shown up at your flat, looking for something to do. You invited him in, already two glasses of wine deep, giggling as you poured him his own.

The two of you sat on the couch, your legs across his powerful thighs. You giggled at the idiocy in almost every scene, looking at the drinking game on your phone to confirm it fit the arbitrary game’s criteria before taking a swig. You were far from being drunk but you were definitely making your way towards tipsy.

You rolled your eyes at the scene on the screen. Christian was about to spank Ana for a reason you couldn’t remember. All you could think about was how wrong the scene was.

“No no NO!” You yelled at your TV, paying no mind to Çağlar who had begun to laugh at your antics. “That’s not how consensual BDSM works, you fucker!”

“What do you mean, [Y/N]?” Çağlar asked, setting his wine glass down on the end table.

You huffed in annoyance, stalling for time as you wordlessly handed him your wineglass to set on the table. What you were about to admit wasn’t something that you went around telling anyone, but the alcohol and how comfortable you felt around Çağlar helped the words spill out of your mouth. “I mean,” you started, gesturing towards the TV, “that that isn’t how consensual BDSM works! Both parties have to enter into it with all expectations on the table and a safe word, and an understanding of hard and soft limits. Being a submissive is nothing like what Ana makes it out to be and any Dom who acts like Christian is not a Dom - they’re an abusive asshole that takes advantage of people who know next-to-nothing about BDSM.”

Çağlar turned his attention from you to the television, where Ana was being pulled over Christian’s lap for a punishment spanking. “What do you know about BDSM?” He asked, both excited for and dreading your response.

You shrugged, attempting to remain as nonchalant and as unaffected as possible, but inside you were starting to get turned on just explaining this. “It’s my kink.”

You quietly braced yourself for his reaction - most people got weird about kinks - but he surprised you by placing a hand on your knee. “Which part?” He asked and you could have sworn you heard a hint of jealousy in his voice at the prospect of you engaging in BDSM with someone who wasn’t him.

“All of it. Mostly spanking, though.” You gestured to the screen just as Christian started to spank Ana. “I haven’t found anyone who could handle it - all the guys I trusted enough to do it either think I’m made of glass or just don’t have the confidence for it.”

You held your breath as Çağlar sat silently next to you, processing everything you had told him. You were fairly open about yourself, but the one thing you had never ventured into with one of the guys was the topic of sex. As James Maddison’s friend from childhood, you had become friends with most of the boys, but Çağlar was the one you were closest to outside of Madders. He was also the one you were most attracted to, but you would rather die than tell that to anyone.

When he spoke next, his accent was thicker than usual and there was a heat in his gaze that you felt down to your core. “Would you like a spanking, [Y/N]?”

“N-now?” You stuttered, unable to believe that this was actually happening.

“It doesn’t have to be now, but-”

“Yes,” you interrupted, your voice taking on a breathy quality as your breathing increased.

He reached out his hand and you placed yours in his. With a sharp tug, he pulled you over his lap. You gasped at being so exposed, and he hadn’t even taken down your sweatpants.

A part of you desperately hoped the rumours were true. James, Ben and a bunch of the other Leicester City players were always talking about how Çağlar liked inflicting pain on other people, and you couldn’t wait to find out. Ever since you had met him, you had wanted to find out, and you couldn’t believe it was happening now.

The sharp sting of Çağlar’s hand on your ass brought you back to reality. “Harder,” you moaned, barely feeling the first one.

His response was to spank your other ass cheek, causing you to whimper.

“Another, please, Sir,” you said, breathless, surprising yourself at how quickly the moniker slipped out.

Slap!

Another gasp. You could feel how wet you were, and you couldn’t wait for Çağlar to take down you sweatpants.

You counted out each slap until you reached ten. Once you reached ten, he stopped. You were breathing heavily, and you could feel his growing erection beside you. His hand rested on your lower back, causing you to break out in goosebumps at the contact.

Slowly, his hand moved down, his fingers curling under the waistband of your sweatpants. You braced yourself on the couch, lifting your hips so your sweatpants slid down to your ankles.

“What do we have here?” He muttered in his thick accent, brushing his thumb over the wet spot on your panties. Your cheeks burned hot, the humiliation only turning you on further. You briefly wondered when his English had improved but you lost all train of thought when he slapped your ass again.

Once again, you counted to ten, growing wetter with each slap. His thumb returned between your legs, putting pressure on your clit and making you moan. “Çağlar, please,” you begged, wiggling your hips. Your panties came down shortly after, but he didn’t start spanking you right away. He slipped a finger into your wet heat, and you whimpered. A second finger followed, and you cried out, his name on your lips.

He thrust his fingers rhythmically in and out, watching as you came apart from his touch. Just as you were about to reach orgasm, he slid his fingers out and stuck them in his mouth. “You taste so good, [Y/N],” he whispered, his accent sending shivers down your spine.

Before you could react, he was spanking you again. You clutched at the couch, trying to grasp onto something - anything - but the thick couch material didn’t allow for you to grab onto it. “Çağlar!” You screamed as the last slap landed on your burning ass.

He helped you up, and you blushed as your eyes met his. Instinctively, you reached back to rub your ass, but Çağlar pulled you into his lap, the same hand that caused you pain now rubbing soothing circles on your back.

After a few moments, he tugged off your sweatpants and panties, letting them land softly on the ground. You pulled your shirt over your head, letting it fall on top of the rest of your discarded clothes.

Çağlar laid you back slowly, his hands spreading your thighs. You whimpered again, the cool air hitting your exposed pussy. “Let me make you feel good,” he whispered, licking his lips as he buried his face between your legs.

You cried out, tangling your fingers in his hair, your hips bucking wildly as he sucked on your clit. His moans of pleasure vibrated on your sensitive skin, and you found yourself screaming his name as you rode his face.

***

Over the next few weeks, the two of you spent any free time you had with each other. He became the first person you texted after a long day at work, needing relief.

Sure enough, he was over within the hour, bending you over a surface, spanking you until you cried, needing the emotional and physical release. Each time, he took care of you afterward, never asking for anything in return, but there were times where you sank to your knees, the only aftercare you needed being his cock in your mouth.

The most memorable session happened after a devastating 3-0 loss to Chelsea. You had arrived home after the match to find a text one your phone reading, “I want you in nothing but my jersey. No panties.”

When your doorbell buzzed, you could feel your wetness dripping down your thigh as you opened the door, Çağlar on the other side dressed in his matchday suit. Wordlessly, he backed you up against the wall, his hand slipping between your legs. He smirked as you let out a groan. “So wet for me, babe, and I haven’t even done anything to you.”

You were panting, barely able to form words. “Spank me, Çağlar. Please.”

He grabbed you by the wrist, flinging you against the back of the couch. You gasped as his calloused hands spread your ass cheeks. He stepped away, but not before swiping his finger along the inside of your thigh, collecting your arousal and sucking on his finger. You started to lift yourself off the couch, but he stopped you with a sharp slap on each asscheck. “Stay.” He ordered, and you could barely hear the sounds of his belt slipping out of his pants over your panting.

Up until now, he had only used his hands to spank you; the belt was new. He tested it out, lightly slapping it against your thighs. When he lashed it across your ass, you gasped. “Harder, please!”

He didn’t listen, continuing the motion with the same pace and severity that was driving you mad. You wanted whatever pain he was willing to inflict upon you, but you were unprepared for this. “Çağlar!” You moaned, desperate for him to hit you harder.

He stopped, placing the belt next to your body. Placing his hands on your hips, he lifted you off the couch and turned you to face him. The tortured look on his face hurt you more than any spanking he had ever administered. “Oh, Çağlar,” you whispered, bringing a hand to his face, dragging him down for a kiss. Wetness brushed across your cheeks as you kissed him, and it took you a moment to realize that he was crying.

His forehead rested against yours, his eyes still closed. You brought your other hand up to wipe his cheeks, your heart aching for him. His arms wound around your lower back and he pulled you against him. When he released you, you threaded your fingers through his and led him to your bedroom.

“Lay down,” you ordered, pulling his suit jacket from his torso. He did as you asked, and you climbed on top of him, straddling his powerful body that had worked so hard today. One by one, you undid each button, placing a kiss on each patch of skin you exposed. When you were finished, he sat up, abs rippling as you pulled the material over his shoulders and arms. You gasped at the dark bruises that were already starting to form on his ribs, evidence of his heavy collision with Tammy Abraham on the pitch today. You ran your hands over them, your touch featherlight. His grunt of pain had you leaning down to press a kiss to his bruised flesh.

With his belt out of the way, you undid the button and zipper on his pants, sliding them down his sturdy thighs, relishing the way the muscles bunched and stretched. His cock sprang free - your eyes met his and you couldn’t help but smirk knowing he had gone commando just for you. Moving down his body, you pressed a kiss to the head of his cock, licking off the drops of precum that begun to form. Reaching into your nightstand, you grabbed a condom and rolled it over his cock before mounting him.

You rode him slowly, careful not to place your hands on his bruises. When you climaxed together, you leaned down and pressed a chaste kiss to his lips.

“Maybe tomorrow you’ll use the belt on me.”

He huffed out a laugh as he kissed your temple. “Guess we’ll find out in the morning, Darling.”

#cags writing #cags originals

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jenomark · 5 years

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Was hoping you could do 127 doing something special for their s/o like breakfast in bed or like turning off the alarm so they get more sleep, packing their lunch or like idk engraving a locket? Something cute I’m in my soft hours what do you think

Taeil: Taeil sat with you in the studio. He loved when you watched him work. He found inspiration when you looked at him like you were proud. “Sit down. I want you to hear something.” he said. You both sat on the couch, your foot playing with his. Taeil brought out his guitar and started playing you a beautiful melody. When he was finished, you swore his eyes were tearing up. “Do you like it? I wrote it with you in mind. It’s my whole heart in a song.” he said.

Johnny: “Close your eyes.” Johnny said. He held your hand and led you into a room. You shuffled forward, careful not to trip over anything. When he told you to open them, you had to admit that you felt a little scared. You didn’t like surprises much, and Johnny was always your wildcard. “What do you think?” Johnny asked. In the middle of the room sat a bookshelf with a satin red bow tied to it. “I built it for you. It’s from Ikea! I know how much you needed space for your books.”

Taeyong: You came home and Taeyong had set out a full feast on the dining room table, complete with a bouquet of flowers adorning the middle. “What’s the occasion?” you asked, wracking your brain to see if you missed an important date. He untied his apron and set down two wine glasses. “My love for you.” he said. He was always doing soft things like this for you, but it never failed to make your heart jump in your chest.

Yuta: Yuta liked to hide little notes for you to find. He stuck post-it notes to you mirror telling you how beautiful and intelligent you were, every morning. He folded little notes into the shape of a heart, and left them in your bag for you to see throughout the day. Each message was full of love and made you swoon.

Doyoung: Doyoung preferred to text, but he wanted to hear your voice. You picked up after the first ring, which made Doyoung smile. “Is everything alright?” you asked. Doyoung laughed softly. You could hear the traffic around him, and figured he must be standing outside, taking a break from recording. “I wanted to call and hear your voice. I miss you so much.” he said.

Jaehyun: A big eater, Jaehyun packed the picnic basket with all of your favorite foods. He took his time to think about all of your inside jokes, and all of the memorable food you’ve eaten since you two started dating. When he brought you to this beautiful grassy hill and set out a blanket, you were already so in love with him. “You can’t get any more perfect.” you said, kissing him on his lips.

WinWin: With Sicheng, it was the little things. He wasn’t big on grand gestures of affection, especially with too much pressure on him. He loved to tuck your hair behind your ear when it was getting in your face. He picked up things for you from the store without you asking him to because he was always thinking of you. When you felt like life was caving in on you, Sicheng was always there for you when you needed him the most.

Jungwoo: “Woo Woo, I’m so tired.” you said. You got in from work and leaned against the wall, feeling like you couldn’t move anymore. Jungwoo came to you at once, pulling you into his arms and supporting most of your weight. “Did my baby have a long day?” he asked, kissing the top of you head. You couldn’t get the words out. You muffled a sob into his chest, feeling like you might finally break. Jungwoo turned around and told you to climb on his back. “I’ll carry you upstairs and draw you a warm bath.” he said.

Mark: Mark was nervous. He held the envelope in his hands, and kept tapping it against whatever surface was available. When you held out your hand, he gingerly placed it in your fingers. “What is this?” you asked. Mark was rarely nervous in front of you, so you knew it had to be something important to him. You looked down and saw your name scribbled on the front. “I wrote you a love letter. It’s everything I love about you.” he said.

Haechan: “I made you a playlist,” Haechan said, handing you his phone and a pair of headphones. “I thought it would make you feel better. These songs always make me feel better.” You put the headphones in your ears. You felt like you could cry from his sweet gesture. You had been going through a rough time lately, and Haechan was always looking out of you. “Thank you.” you told him, putting the headphones in your ear. Haechan watched your face as you listened to the songs, smiling every time you seemed to enjoy one.

#Anonymous #nct #nct fluff #nct fluff reactions #nct reactions #nct 127 #nct 127 fluff #nct 127 fluff reactions #mark #haechan #jungwoo #winwin #jaehyun #doyoung #yuta #taeyong #johnny #taeil

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strangerstuffandthingsimagines · 6 years

Text

Small Doses (Billy Hargrove x Reader)

(GIF BELONGS TO ME PLEASE CREDIT ME IF YOU USE THANK YOU)

Summary: “Billy was like a drug.You were determined to steer clear of his advances at first but you always came back for more. He was like unchartered waters that you found yourself diving into far too quickly. You became addicted to his rough touches against your soft skin, to the explosive eruption of unfamiliar feelings whenever you were around him.”

Warnings: Panic attack, sexual themes mentioned (not smut, I don’t write smut lol), swear words, I think that’s It lol

A/N: Hey guys! I hope you like this, I’m not sure if you will because I have zero confidence in myself :) Sorry for all the Billy fics, I didn’t realize that I had already posted so many aha. Also, I gave Tommy the last name Hoffman because he’s just listed as Tommy H, and I needed a full name for the story.

October

You had been dragged to Tina’s party by Nancy, she figured it would be good for you and Jonathan. She was set on the idea that you were perfect for each other, little to your knowledge, this was an attempt at pushing Jonathan away so Nancy couldn’t give into her feelings.

Alcohol and nicotine polluted the air of Tina’s living room, bodies against bodies as the music radiated from the speakers. This wasn’t an ideal night for you, especially with the stress of upcoming early entrance exams for universities and colleges weighing down on you.

The rhythmic pulse of the music left a ringing in your ears, the cool October breeze cooling your skin as you made your way outside. Nancy was completely shit faced, Jonathan, coming to her rescue. Steve was nowhere in sight and you were left at a house party you hadn’t wanted to go, to begin with.

The best bet you had at getting home was finding a telephone, this, of course, became more and more difficult to accomplish.

You had searched the house for a phone, desperately trying to get ahold of your mother but with no success.

Panic began to set in.

The motion around you moved faster than you could process, your head spinning and your legs losing their ability to carry your weight. It was like drowning, the water consuming your entire being. The surface was just out of your reach as the anxiety pulled you further and further down.

Struck by the sudden impact of a strangers chest, you were forced back into a state of reality.

“Watch it.” The voice snapped, you eyes trailing up to meet his. They were cold and brooding, his stare was intimidating and made you feel worse.

“I can’t breathe” Your mouth moved without control, it felt like your entire body was losing feeling as you began to shake. “I-I can’t breathe.”

Hot tears raced down your cheeks, your hand gripped onto his forearm tightly, not realizing your actions as you entered a frantic state.

“You got asthma or something?” He enquired, his hands stabilizing you as they held onto your shoulders. Genuine concern softened the features of his face.

Billy guided you outside, his arm wrapped firmly around your shoulders, scared that you would collapse without his help.

You cried with a loud and uncontrollable force, deep inhales broke apart in your lungs as your fingers squeezed into the palm of your hand. The thought of breaking down in front of a stranger terrified you, the fear of judgement had begun to eat away at your insides.

“I’m so embarrassed.” You gasped, sucking in air as you cried. “I’m so embarrassed.”

You couldn’t stop, you couldn’t breathe and you couldn’t escape.

Your rapid breaths ceased, his lips firmly pressed against yours. You pulled away from him, face frozen in a bewildered expression.

“Why did you do that?” you asked with wide eyes, your hands raised in an awkward curled position.

Billy licked his lips, his eyebrows raised matching your own expression.

“Huh?” he asked as if he hadn’t heard you, leaning in with his ear toward you.

“You just kissed me…?” your eyes rolling up and down as you took in who he was.

“That was CPR,” he said with confidence.

The shocked expression on your face fell as you erupted into a fit of laughter, unable to tell if he was making a bad joke or genuinely believing the words that flowed so carelessly from his mouth.

“What?” He asked as smirk lifted the corner of his mouth. “What’s funny?”

Billy was like a drug.

You were determined to steer clear of his advances at first but you always came back for more. He was like unchartered waters that you found yourself diving into far too quickly. You became addicted to his rough touches against your soft skin, to the explosive eruption of unfamiliar feelings whenever you were around him.

November

It started at lunch, like any other day you had been coaxed into sitting with Billy and his friends. You hated sitting with Tommy, Carol and whichever goon had latched onto Billy for the day. Your movements were small and nervous as you slowly poked the prongs of your fork into the sweet honeydew on your plate, hesitantly lifting it to your mouth.

The table abruptly jerked as Tommy theatrically made a crude joke, nearly tipping the table. You sighed in annoyance at the rowdy behaviour that always seemed to happen whenever you were around. In his eyes, you were just another Nancy Wheeler, latching onto Bily the way she had done to Steve.

Tommy’s beady eyes locked onto you, his stare making you feel small, insecure even. You glanced over at Billy to see if he noticed Tommy’s leer, but your boyfriend was engrossed in a conversation with one of the other guys, deep in discussion over who had a better layup in gym class.

You slid your hand under the table, softly caressing Billy's knuckles that rested on his thigh. Despite the warm smile that Billy gave you, it wasn’t enough to ease your discomfort.

“Hey, Billy, can I just say your an inspiration, to not only me but for mankind.” Tommy declared with malevolence.

Billy’s eyebrows furrowed, the corner of his mouth turning inward with confusion.

“The fuck are you on about?” He asked turning his attention to Tommy, taking a chug from his Pepsi can.

“Come on!” Tommy exclaimed palms pressed firmly on the table as he stood up. “You're a legend. I mean, how many girls have you nailed since you got here? You probably can’t even count on your fingers how many you chicks you’ve banged. I can only bet the list goes on in California”

Your stomach tightened as Tommy continued to make comments about Billy’s past. It wasn't something you ever discussed but you weren't stupid, you knew he had been a bit of a player.

“Shut the fuck up, Hoffman,” Billy growled, his jaw set in a tight line. Clearly mad now that Tommy’s words led you to retract your hand from his.

“Y/N,” Tommy said, forcing you to be part of this uncomfortable conversation. “What’s your body count? Oh, right I forgot, Billy’s your first boyfriend, isn’t he?”

Your ears began to heat up from embarrassment, the apples of your cheeks deepening in colour. Tommy was trying to make you insecure about your inexperience though there was absolutely nothing to be ashamed about. Your nails dug into the palms of your hand, nearly tearing into the flesh.

Carol raised an eyebrow at her boyfriend, even she was shocked by his words. Although her brow raised as a smirk played on her lips now, amused by the effect he had on you.

“One more word out of your mouth and you're fucking dead.” Billy seethed, his grip on your waist tightened as he pulled you into his side protectively.

Tommy threw his hands up in surrender, a weasel-like grin on his face. Your hands peeled back Billy’s fingers from your side, slipping out of his grip. You felt a slew of emotions, you were angry at yourself for continuously putting yourself in a position that would make you uncomfortable. You were embarrassed by Tommy’s comments, which left you feeling insecure.

“No, she’s totally banged, Billy. The quiet ones are always freaks in the sheets.” Carol quipped. “I bet they’ve done it in the back of his Camaro.”

You practically ran out of the cafeteria, your backpack clutched tightly in your hand. Your left hand digging around for your house keys as you were ready to sprint home if it meant you could escape the situation.

“Babe, wait,” Billy called, hot on your trail.

“Leave me alone.” You choked, feverishly searching through the contents of your bag. “Please, just go away.”

His hand took your backpack from your hands and hid it behind his back.

“Y/N, relax for a minute. I’ll fucking kill him.” Billy moved side to side as you tried to reach around him for your bag.

“Why does he do that?” You snapped, angry tears pooling in your eyes. “And why do you let him?”

“What do you mean let him?” he asked defensively. “Have they said shit like that before to you?”

Your eyes rolled up to the ceiling, the pressure behind them becoming unbearable to hold back.

“Did you tell them?” You asked, slowly lowering your gaze to meet his.

“What? Tell them what?” He snapped, now becoming irritated by your doubt in him.

“That we...”You peered around to check if anyone was coming down the hallway or listening in. “that we slept together.”

He was silent for a moment, his brooding eyes moving around your face, studying your expression.

“No, because you told me not to.” He said cooly, your arms folded tightly against your chest avoiding his gaze. “Babe, please don’t cry. You know I hate it when you cry.”

He dropped your bag to his feet, his firm hands cupping your cheeks as his thumbs softly wiped away your tears.

“I don’t want to sit with them anymore.” Your voice cracked as your evaded his gaze.

“What can I do to make this better?” He pleaded with penitent eyes.

Billy was the first person you had ever been with, part of you felt ashamed as you worried he would leave you after he got what he wanted from you. You were far more than just a hookup to Billy. He loved you. He really, truly loved you.

There was something almost angelic about you, you were kind and gentle. You were the salvation of his sin, he needed you.

“Beat him up.” a small smile pulling at the corner of your lips, quickly breaking the tension.

“Really?” he asked seriously, cocking an eyebrow at your request.

“No, I’m just joking.” you grinned, Billy pressed his lips to yours.

“There's that smile,” he whispered against your lips.

You may not have been Billy’s first, but he was convinced you were his last.

January

One moment you were screaming at each other, the windows fogging from the heat that radiated from your rage.

“I’m not doing this.” You breathed, hand already reaching for the door handle. “Talk to me when you're not wasted.”

With that, you slammed the car door leaving Billy to simmer down in the driver's seat.

He promised he wouldn’t drink, he swore he’d stay by your side the entire party and behave, But he didn't. Billy had to prove himself to the people he didn’t like, to impress the classmates who didn’t matter in the long run, that he could down the keg faster than Tommy. The party was just down the street, you were so upset with him you found yourself walking home. The brisk January air cutting through your thin cardigan as you forgot your jacket in his car.

Around 2:30 in the morning Billy had sobered up, got in his car, and drove. Like muscle memory, his arms turned the wheel in the familiar pattern until be found himself in front of your small home.

Sheets of freezing rain pelted down on the windshield,

Blood cacked under his nostrils, his left eye beginning to swell as he stood outside your bedroom window. You found yourself crawling out of bed and unlocking your window, taken aback by his appearance.

“Billy!” you whispered, careful not to wake your mother in the next room over. “Oh god, what happened?”

Your hands reaching into the cold night and pulling him into your window, he weakly climbed in, nearly collapsing into your arms.

“I’m so sorry.” He murmured into your hair, you struggled to support his weight.

“Hey, hey, It’s okay.” You cooed, your heart racing. “Billy we have to get you out of those wet clothes.”

He barely moved as your hands fumbled with the buttons of his shirt, then working at his coat and pants. You placed them on the small radiator that sat against your wall.

“Billy your freezing.” You commented, his skin almost sickly to the touch.

You guided him toward your bed, helping him under the covers. You climbed in next to him, pressing your body as close as humanly possible trying to warm him up. The quiet chatter of his teeth rattled in your ear, his arms wrapped around you tightly, desperate for the warmth of your touch.

Taking your thumb, you tenderly rubbed away the dry blood that had collected above his lip.

“Tommy said something,” Billy mumbled. “Something really fucked up.” He continued, his teeth clenching together.

You raised your head from his chest and watched his face as he spoke.

“What did he say?” your hand rubbing circles on his chest, trying to warm him up.

“I don’t want to talk about it.” He said, almost sadly.

You didn’t press the matter any further, partially relieved as you weren't positive that you wanted to know. You tugged at the comforter, pulling it up higher around you too.

Neither of you fell asleep, completely wired from the night.

“He said that I broke you in, that I should let the basketball team have a go with you since you must be easy after sleeping with me.” His voice was hoarse as if he was fighting back tears, “You don’t deserve the shit that people say about you. It’s my fucking fault, I’m bad for you. I’m a bad guy, Y/N.”

“Billy, your not bad...you’ve just had bad things happen to you.” You comforted, slowly sitting up, reclining on your right arm.

Billy had felt guilty about being with you, he felt as if he had tainted you and your image. He was undeserving of your affection. Unworthy of your soft touches against his rough skin.

“I ruined you, didn’t I?” his voice fragile.

“What? Billy, no why would you think that?” You asked grazing his swollen brow. “hmm?”

His tongue ran across his busted lip, the taste of blood filling his mouth.

“I just-” he shook his head as he tried to suppress the tears that desperately tried to escape. Maybe it was the alcohol, or maybe it was the fear of losing you but he couldn’t stop himself. “I’m selfish because I know I don’t deserve you but I can’t bring myself to let you go.”

Your hand slid from his brow and down to his side, collapsing into him, pulling him into a tight embrace. No one hated Billy more than he hated himself, you knew this too well. He was self-destructive, he forced a toxic facade and broke everything he touched, but he wasn't bad.

“I’ll beat him up for you” you offered, attempting to get a smile out of Billy.

He remained silent, processing what you said, almost as if he were considering it.

“No, your too much of a sweetheart,” he whispered into your soft hair. “You’ve got so much good in you, do you know that?”

“I can give some to you if you want.” you smiled. “I think I have too much.”

He shifted onto his side, tucking a hand under his cheek as he grinned at you.

“Yeah?” He sleepily asked, smiling back at you. “you’d do that?”

“I’m a giver,” you pursed your lips playfully. “I’ll give you all of it if you want.”

“Well, I’ve already given you all of mine, so, it’s only fair.” his voice husky as he inched closer, his lips finding yours.

“Are you staying to watch me play, or are you hanging out with Wheeler?” Billy asked, playing with a pen you asked him to hold while you fill your bag with books.

“Sorry Billy, I’ve got plans with my mom, actually.” You apologised, plucking the pen from his hand. “Score a goal for me, okay?”

Disappointment washed over his face as he realized you wouldn’t be staying.

“Alright, could I come over later? Maybe take you out to the movies or something?” He asked, his fingers rubbing your elbow lovingly.

“I’d like that.” leaning on your toes you pressed your lips to his cheek. “is 8′o clock okay?”

“Perfect. I’ll see you then, get home safe okay?” Billy said after he kissed your lips.

You nodded, urging him to get going otherwise he’d be late for his practice. You watched as he went, waiting until he was out of sight before unsheathing the secret you had been hiding in your bag.

While Billy and the team played basketball you exacted your revenge on Tommy H. With the pocket knife you had been given by Billy (he was certain you needed it for protection), you sliced into all four tires of Tommy’s car.

#SSATBilly #billy hargrove x reader #billy hargrove #billy hargrove imagine #billy Hargrove fan fiction #billy hargrove oneshot #billy hargrove reader insert #stranger things imagine #stranger things 2 imagine #stranger things #stranger things 2 #billy hargrove fanfiction

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hobslobster-remade · 6 years

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⚝⛄❄Happy Holidays!❄⛄⚝

The holidays have arrived! This year, I’ve decided to do a small appreciation post just to celebrate everything good that happened this year, and to share my love with everyone who I met on this (sometimes slightly problematic..) site! As the holidays are a time of sharing love with the ones you care for, here’s a little something I’d like everyone to know before I get to specific people:

Regardless of who you are and what you do, know that you are loved and will always be loved as long as I’m here. 2017 wasn’t the greatest of years, a lot of tragedies struck and left us feeling lost and alone so it’s especially important to keep our heads up and move into 2018 with a strong resolve, smiles on our faces. Let’s fly into 2018, hoping for success and happiness. Whoever you are, where ever you are, I wish you the best of years filled with joy, love and warmth. Times will be trying, not everything will go according to plan, but know that if we stick together and support one another we’ll get through it! Here’s to 2018, the year of love over hate, triumph over defeat, together over alone.

💝💝💝

I’d like to thank some people especially for a wonderful year, so here it is 💝:

1. @tae-strawberry

Rahmah, my darling, my soulmate, my baby, my part time fake girlfriend, I love you. You were the first same age friend I made on here and I don’t think you understand how much that means to me. Every time you sent me a fake Hobi snap, the space reserved for you in my heart got just a little bit bigger. We have so much in common and we never had a dull conversation, I really missed not having you around these past few months. I cherish you so much and you’ve always been so kind to me, calling my hands “golden” and just generally taking care of me when I refused to do so myself. Thank you for being such a great friend (who I honestly couldn’t love more even if I tried), you’ve reassured me through the worst, written a fic for me (which was amazing by the way, but that’s to be expected), called me a meme and talked late into the night with me despite our time difference. I hope we can still be close friends in 2018 and that you receive all the love in the world. Stay healthy, stay hydrated and please don’t take on too much stress! I loved you when I first met you, I love you now, and I will love you in the future too if you let me. 💝

2. @taylorinthezone

Taytortot my love, you’re a little brat but I love you anyways. We’ve known each other for what.. 3.. almost 4.. years now? That’s a LONG time Taylor Scheydt, I’m not good at keeping friends around so it says a lot that you’re still here. We’ve been through a lot together, you were the first to call me out on not being straight (much appreciated by the way) when I was still in denial. We met through some pointless conversation about Naruto on *cue the gasps* Google+ and ever since we’ve been friends. I watched you go through your Town of Salem phase, and get together with Adam (and then I watched you two break up..) and grow up to turn into this wonderful person. I’m so glad we’re still friends even though we don’t talk that much anymore, although when we do find the time to converse it always feels like we never stopped talking. I’m pretty sure our American vs. Canadian feud will never end, and that you’ll never stop greeting me by insulting me straight up but you know what? That’s what makes our friendship so special, thanks for always being by my side. I really, really, love you (and River you beautiful dog). Thanks for being a dork. 💝

3. @religion-agustd

Hoo boy, strap yourself in Becky this is going to be a long ride. Mariana, my beautiful Brazilian soulmate, I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve told you that I love you, but I’m not going to stop because no matter how many times I tell you, it won’t be enough. I made a stupid joke, you followed me, I followed you, and in 2 days we were best friends. It’s crazy how fast we became accustomed to one another. You were the first person who ever gave me real advice on loving myself and who I’m turning out to be, your constant reassurances are a reason I don’t break down everyday (seriously how did I survive before you came along???). You spoke to me as if I was someone who mattered, despite my age, you respected my opinions and weren’t hesitant to share your own. I think I’ll forever love you for that, for telling me that I’m a valid human being with completely relevant thoughts and opinions of my own. Our relationship is one that I cherish a lot, it’s just so supportive and bright and constantly cheery! I love being able to reassure you because you’ve helped me so much that it feels like I’m useful, I love listening to you rant about nothing and being stupid with you. You stay up late for me (although, it’s summer there so you’d probably be staying up late anyways), honestly, I’m just in love with you and your beautiful personality. Not only have you been the best friend I could ask for but you share my love for Yoonseok and aren’t afraid to share it with the world (hence, our blog). I’m in awe of your outgoing, bubbly personality (even if you say that you’re not usually this charged with energy) and your ability to approach bigger blogs (because I’m honestly terrified of doing that). I need to keep this short so I’m going to wrap this up soon, even though I could probably go on for days. Thank you for being the supportive, kind person you are. You’ve endured a lot and I’m immensely glad that you got through everything using sheer strength and willpower. You’re an inspiration to me, and I know you joke about me being a younger version of you but that’s exactly what I aim to be. I aspire to be someone like you Mari, thank you for giving out love so selflessly. Let’s walk into 2018 together, hoping for better days filled only with happiness. You deserve it, boo. 💝

4. @taeboos

Sarah! Rara! My wonderful smol bean! We haven’t been able to get to know each other too well but you were the second person that I ever approached on this site and let me tell you, it felt good to be welcomed with open arms. We bonded over our mutual love for Naruto, The Mortal Instruments and occasionally, hating on Dylan from Maximum Ride. I love you and your personality, let’s stay friends in 2018 as well, okay? I hope you’re surrounded by love and security in the new year, happy holidays! 💝

5. @tae-la-tiger

JIKOOK. This one word basically sums up our friendship to be honest.. no.. but really you’re so cute! Your blog is g o a l s and your love for Jikook is the best because I finally have someone to rant to! I know you’ve been busy lately, so I hope you’re taking care of yourself and focusing on what you need to focus on. I’m still in awe that you’re so nice and sweet to me, I feel so unworthy TT. ALSO, I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU GOT NOTICED BY BTS ON TWITTER WHAT A QUEEN. Laura, you’re just an adorable little squish and I genuinely hope that you have an amazing year in 2018. I hope we can talk more and be better friends! 💝

6. @aesthetic-local-trash

Payton a.k.a the only one who will ever get my trashy jokes because she makes trashy jokes too. We only met a while back through Secret Santa but I’m already loving you! You’re so adorable and although we’re the same age, I have this overwhelming urge to protect you from the dangers of the universe. I know that you were affected quite badly by the tragic news that hit us 3 days ago, so I hope you’re taking care of yourself and being gentle with your recovery process. Everyone heals differently, so don’t feel too pressured to be back to normal immediately. I’m hoping to get to know you better in 2018 so that we can round up all the other ‘03 liners in this fandom and rope them into a gigantic group chat (because let’s admit, that would be awesome). I hope you’re taking things easy, school sucks and it’s even harder when your family doesn’t try to understand your troubles so just know that, as always, I’ll be here if you need to let off some steam. Please take care of yourself, 2018 will be the year of healing, let’s stay true to that okay? 💝

7. @biminnie

MY FELLOW MLB ENTHUSIAST!!! I can’t believe I found someone who actually liked Miraculous Ladybug, you’re an actual angel. Talking about the plot and characters with you was so fun because you know so much and I’ve always loved digging a little deeper into the stories so that you’re not just getting the surface. Thanks for being so insightful and sweet (not to mention beautiful wow??), have an amazing 2018!

8. @hosseokss

You love our sunshine and have given me permission to punch anyone who insults him ever again, what more can I ask for??? You’re an adorable human being who I’d love to get to know better (we hoseok stans have got to stick together, you know?). I know that these past days probably haven’t been the easiest for you, but please hang in there. We’ll get through this together, I’ll always be here if you need a little bit of sunshine. Thanks for sending me love and being my older sister. Here’s to 2018, a year of new friendship! 💝

9. @lcsees

Lovely Lorna, we barely even know each other but I’m including you here because you’re such a kind person. Not only do you share my love for Daughter, but you were kind enough to send me a message when you sensed I wasn’t doing quite right. On top of everything, you’re an amazing writer! Let’s continue down our road to friendship in 2018 as well! 💝

10. @thestorythatneverbegan

I made a stupid, informal request for a BTS outsiders AU and you’re now turning that into reality, thanks for being so sweet (and an incredible writer!). I think we can aim for friends in 2018, right? 💝

11. @jungkooksknee

I know we don’t talk but you’re actually one of my longest standing mutuals so I just want to thank you for being such a kind individual who chose to follow me (because let’s face it, I’m hard to put up with). Have a wonderful 2018 filled with joy! 💝

(I’m going to ignore the fact that this list ends on an odd number because it makes me unreasonably uncomfortable.)

Of course, I’m also sending all the love possible to my other mutuals:

@laytmblr @taehyungswonders @kattyandd @mint-chapstick @taexguk @mrs-maknae @j1nsgf @taehyung-smiile @kayphamm @lanawalker18 @jinslaughter @sopeshighnotes @po-tae-hoe @otsukaresope @the-devils @sopehope @crithmum @syeokjin @cuteseokjin @je0n @hoodiejungkook @yougotnojams99 @uncool365 @a-vminism-pro @moonmom @bewareoftaehyung @jiminmochi-chimchim @punkvee @seokjinlesbian @muricairishbritlover @the-julienne-ihnat @aunnie-ssi @just-bangtantrash @humcreates @hobieism @kamjong-kai @ofsugas @redheadhobi @piedparkjimin @nebusin @stay-unique-different @baeforjjj @s-s-sugaplum + all of my followers

That’s it folks! My appreciation post for 2017! I love you all and never forget that I’m here for you, it doesn’t matter if we don’t know each other. There’s a first for everything, right? And please, if I don’t talk to you first, it’s because I’m insufferably shy and don’t know how to put myself out there first, so message me first! I’ll try to be the least amount of awkward, I promise! I really do want to become better friends with all of you! 💝

❄⛄⚝ Happy Holidays~ ⚝⛄❄

#mutuals appreciation post #everyone appreciation post #happy holidays!!#posting this a bit earlier than planned since im going somewhere over the holidays

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namjoonsteeth · 6 years

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Ruin The Friendship V

Title: Ruin The Friendship (mini-series) Part 5

Word-Count: 5.1k

Pairing: Jay Park/ Reader (kinda)

Summary: Best friends to lovers. Inspired by Ruin The Friendship - Demi Lovato.

Genre: Smutty Fluff

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 6

I leave Jay’s bed in the morning before he even wakes up. I thought I was ok last night, that I’d come to a resolution, but when I opened my eyes and felt his arms around me all I felt was how cold he was last night. I spent my life brushing Jay’s antics under the rug, forgiving his actions as quickly as they came solely because it’s what I thought I was supposed to do as his friend, his best friend.

Today I feel a little betrayed. I’d always given a hundred and ten percent of myself into the relationship between us back when it was only platonic. I couldn’t help the hurt deep in my chest at the inkling that he had been accusing me of maybe wanting the attention or even choosing it over him.

“Men are idiots,” I mumble to myself, pulling a wide tooth comb through my wet hair. My apartment seems foreign and maybe a little neglected. I’d spent most nights at Jay’s over the last few weeks and even when I didn’t, I was only home long enough to fall into bed. I can’t remember the last time I’d used my stove or even opened my fridge.

My phone rings from my bedroom. I pull the towel around my body tighter. Pulling the phone to my ear, I don’t bother checking who it is first.

“Hello?”

“You’re still mad at me,” my boyfriend’s voice sounds so tired, like he literal just woke up. It’s nearly eleven, he’s usually awake by now but granted we both had a late night.

“I’m not mad, I’m just a little disappointed,”

He groans into the phone. “Don’t say that, Y/n. That’s worse than you being mad at me,”

“I know. That’s why I said it. Listen I’m in the middle of sorting my hair out. Can I talk to you later?”

“Y/n,”

“Jay,” I shoot back at him.

“You left,” he says. “You said you would stay,”

“I never said I wouldn’t go home, Jay. It was late, so I stayed the night. And second, how do you think I felt when you left me ass naked on your couch? Or when you’d had your fill and decided I wasn’t worth even talking to,”

“I don’t want to fight with you, Y/n,”

“Oh trust me this isn’t a fight yet. We’ve had plenty so I’m surprised you can’t tell the difference,”

He’s quiet for a long time. I roll my eyes up at the ceiling waiting for him to come up with something else. He’s used to getting his way in all aspects of his life. He works harder than anyone I know to ensure that he’s always on top. What he says goes. Not this time. Not with me.

“I over-reacted, I know. But don’t give up on me-,”

I scoff interrupting him. “Stop being so fucking dramatic. I’m not giving up on anything. You can’t treat me like a toy, Jay. I’m not some girl who’s just itching to make you happy and do whatever you want,”

“I know, Y/n. I know. What do you want me to say?”

I sigh and pull the towel tighter around, getting cold as my body dries off.

“I don’t want you to say anything, Jay. I want to get some work done. I want you to go do whatever it is you usually do. And I want to sleep because I’m living on four hours of sleep right now,”

“So I can’t see you today,” he says softly.

“I don’t know. I’m still irked beyond belief. I’ll call you,”

He scoffs. “You’ll call me? Ok, Y/n. Let me know when you’re over your little-,”

“You’re the one who fucked up, Jay. Don’t act like I’m not justified in wanting to be away from your possessive ass. I said I’ll call you, so I’ll call you,”

I feel the tears prick behind my eyes again. I can’t do this. The tension, the angst. I don’t know how to function. I look up at the ceiling, willing the tears to pull back in. I don’t know why I can’t just keep it together.

“Are you crying?”

Instead of answering his question, I wipe my eyes. I fail at making my sniffle as quiet as possible.

“We’ll talk,” I whisper. “We’ll talk. Just let me have a few hours,”

I sit on the edge of my bed.

“Ok, baby,” he says quietly.

I flop back on my bed when we hang up. It’s a new relationship I keep reminding myself. You could think you know everything about a person. You could think you know how they’ll react in any given situation. And yet, this hostile Jay replays in my head dragging me away from the club, leaving me discarded after he’d fucked me, refusing to talk to me, and then expecting a few sweet words and kisses was the resolution.

We need space. We need to set some boundaries in this new relationship. And we need to come to an understanding that he’s done taking his frustrations out on me.

I get dressed and head to my studio to start sorting through whatever is left before Bora leaves me all alone for three days. I’m hit with how much I actually have to do. There are at least four groups who are on the schedule for consultations and fittings for several different events. I focus my attention entirely on the work in front of me. I’m so focused, I don’t have time to be stressed out about Jay or anything else for that matter.

When I’m done, I feel accomplished, my head seems a bit clearer, and I can admit to missing Jay just a little. Not enough to call him yet. Maybe that’s what we need, time to miss each other.

When he’d get these pockets of substantial time at home, we put pressure on ourselves to make time for each other, to stay involved despite our busy schedules. Now, it seems like it has become expected for us to see each every night. Don’t get me wrong, I much rather prefer going to bed and waking up next to him, but it’s starting to feel like maybe we’re moving a little quick.

I roll my eyes at myself. With the amount of time we’ve known each other, this shouldn’t feel like a new relationship. Still, we’re navigating, discovering, even more, layers about each other day by day. We’re finding things we don’t like and that’s a new concept for both of us.

Y/n: I’m going out to meet up with friends after work. I’ll see you after if you’re not busy

He texts back within seconds.

Jay: I’ll be over

I’m meeting Bora, Elise, and Chae-won at a coffee shop a few minutes away from my office. It’s been too long since I’ve seen Chae and I miss her terribly. Elise and the other hand I could honestly do without. She has always been intrigued by my relationship with Jay.

Very early she’d taken the platonic status of our relationship as an excuse to get closer to him. Back then I couldn’t really do anything about her inquiries.

The three of them are seated at a table in the back of the cafe. Bora is deep in conversation, talking animatedly about something with her purple hair swinging around her ears. Chae smiles and stands from her chair when she sees me. Her arms come around me tightly, my face pressed into her teased long dark hair.

“Girl, it’s been too long!” She tells me. Chae and I have always been close. She’s from New York, and we bonded over how much we miss home sometimes.

“I know, you got married and decided you didn’t need us anymore,” I laugh. Chae rolls her eyes at me but smiles wide taking her seat again. I sit between her and Bora, across from Elise.

“Hey, Y/n,” she says.

“How are you?” I ask her.

It’s always awkward but we try. Her long blonde hair is pulled into a tight severe ponytail. She’s a model, finding it easier to get work in Korea because she’s a foreigner. She fits the standards of beauty here, and good for her. I just always found her tactic a bit...manipulative.

We all fall into conversation, catching up on each other’s lives. The four of us together never go too deep into our lives. I’m sure Elise has a deep stimulating conversation with Chae-won or even Bora but when we’re together, we keep it as surface level as possible.

“Did you forget to give Jay my number again,” Elise’s crystal blue eyes narrow on me.

I’ve always made excuses; leaving early before she’d gotten a chance to hand her information off, or pretending it had gotten lost in the bottom of my purse. By now she has to know that it’s not going to happen.

“Actually, Elise, I don’t think I will,” I say taking a sip of the coffee Bora had gotten for me.

Elise’s smile drops, her eyebrows raising to her hairline.

“God, Y/n. You’re so protective,”

I laugh shrugging my shoulders. “It’s not like that. He’s just seeing someone,”

“Is it serious?” She asks me.

“A few weeks, I think, but-“

She interrupts me, her mega smile back in place. “So it’s not. I don’t mind competition. And you’ll be my foot in the door right?”

“No, I really won’t,” I laugh. “It’s me, Elise. We’re together. I’m not trying to be an asshole but he’s kind of my man now,”

Her light eyes narrow on me, her long fingernails tapping against her cup. “You’re kidding. Wait, that girl in the picture he posted a week ago? That’s you?”

I shrug shooting her a look that I hope looks apologetic rather than smug. I am a little, though. Being close to Jay has always made me feel a bit smug; like I was in on some secret that everyone wanted to know. He’s cool, he’s popular, he’s the elusive bad boy that no one can get to.

“You said you weren’t into him,”

“Come on, Elise. You can’t actually be mad. You told me you just wanted to sleep with him,” Chae-won chimes in.

“Yeah, but it was common knowledge that I called dibs,”

“Actually, Y/n had dibs on him for the last fifteen years,” Bora says nonchalantly.

“But you said you’d help me,” Elise pushes out her bottom lip.

“I lied,” I wince. “Listen I feel a little bad, but I’m not going to just let him go just because he’s missing out on one chance to get his dick wet again,”

“This is ridiculous, does everybody know about this?” She asks us incredulously.

Bora and I shrug. Chae looks like she’s bored of this conversation. “No, Elise, but it’s been pretty obvious they were going to get together, you noticed too,”

“Yes but, what happens to bros before hoes,”

“Oh hush, Elise, you know this doesn’t apply to Y/n and Jay,” Chae says.

Elise crosses her slender arms over her chest. “I feel cheated,”

“There are hundreds of other guys in the city trying to be Jay Park, pick one,” Bora tells her.

“So that’s it? It’s set in stone that she gets to just take the guy I like,”

“You sound like a child,” Bora laughs, pushing her short hair behind her ears.

“I’m leaving,” I announce. I’m wasting time. This whole conversation is a waste of time. I could be cuddled up to my boyfriend instead of explaining myself to someone who pretends to be a friend of mine.

I think she used to like getting under my skin about Jay. A Cheshire smile at the knowledge that if he had decided to link up with her, there wasn’t anything I could do. Now there’s plenty. It’ll be a cold day in hell when I pass anything from her on to my boyfriend, and even then it’d be a stretch.

“I’ll call you,” Chae says.

I hate that she seems to have to pick sides. I don’t want her too. There really isn’t any reason to. There’s no way that Elise is even playing the game to even get her own side, and if she is, she’s playing by herself.

I call Jay on my way home.

“Hey, I’m almost home. Are you coming over?”

“Yes, baby, I’m still coming over,” we’re quiet for a second longer than normal. It’s awkward and I hate how it brings a lump to my throat. Maybe I’m blowing this out of proportion; dragging it out. I’m not sure, I just know that I want nothing more than to have his arms around me again.

“Listen, we’ll talk about this and then we’re done with it ok?”

“Whatever you want, Y/n,”

“I want us to be ok, Jay,”

“We are, baby. We’re fine. We just need to make sure we’re on the same page,” he tells me. “And we are, I think. We’re fine,” he repeats. I don’t know if it’s for his benefit or mine.

He promises to meet me outside of my place in a few. I tell him he doesn’t have to leave work just to spend the rest of the day with me. He calls me ridiculous before hanging up. My pace seems to pick up at the thought of seeing him. I don’t know if this is the love or infatuation part of our relationship, but either way, I’m almost jumping into his arms when I see him waiting for me right outside my place.

My arms wrap around his neck, my lips falling onto his cheek. He kisses my neck before pulling back to kiss my mouth quickly.

He looks too good to just be some guy meeting up with his girlfriend. A black T-shirt stretches across his chest, his ever-present cap hiding his face just a bit.

I lead him up to my apartment, my hand tangled in his. We’re silent, both trying to figure out what to say. I left. I think he’s a bit scared of what that meant.

“I got you something,” Jay whispers as his arms cage me between his body and the door. I lean into him as I unlock my door.

There are roses on every flat surface of my small apartment. Thick bundles with silky ribbons tying them together.

“You broke into my place,” I laugh.

Jay’s arms come around my waist, his chin resting on my shoulder. His head tilts against mine. “Yeah well, you weren’t talking to me so I had to figure something out,”

I pick up a vase that sits on my coffee table. Jay moves with me, watching me bring the flowers to my face. I run my fingers over the silky petals.

“They’re so pretty, but you didn’t have to,” I tell him setting my vase down.

Jay pulls me tight against his body. I feel good here. It’s still weird that I know what he feels like, but it’s right. We aren’t meant to be anything other than what we are in this moment.

“I did, Y/n. I wanted to. I know that I hurt your feelings. I just want you to know that I hear you. I need to chill out, and I’m sorry,” he drops his arms but spins my body so that I’m facing him.

He leans in, his nose brushing against mine. He’s so close, his warm breath washes over my mouth. I’m dying to eliminate the space between us, but that’s not the adult thing to do. Ideally, we come to an agreement that he’ll no longer be an asshole, and I’ll continue to give him shit about everything. It’s how we work. It’s how it’s always been. He doesn’t get to change the rules just because I’ve given up my panties. Still, I miss his mouth enough to not care even for just a second. I lean in first, pressing my lips against his. His mouth opens immediately, welcoming my tongue against his bottom lip. He pulls back after only a few seconds, his lips hot pink and glistening.

“I’m a dickhead,” Jay says against my mouth. His lips drag against my skin as I pull my fingers through his hair.

“You’re right,” I sigh as his lips move to the corner of mine before peppering down to my neck. “You can make it up to me,”

I feel him smile against my skin. “What can I do? Whatever you want is yours,” he tells me.

I try to focus on one train of thought. One favor I can cash in, but there’s a fury of scenarios flashing through my head, giving me too many options. His head between my thighs, tattooed hands wrapped around them, his chest against mine, my legs wrapped around his waist.

I pull away from him, grabbing his hand I lead him toward my bedroom. His fingers intertwined with mine as he walks behind me.

I stop in the middle of my room. He watches me pull my clothes off slowly. His eyes roam every piece of skin that’s revealed. He lingers on my chest, my hips and right below. I climb onto my bed and cross my legs out in front of me.

“I want a striptease,” I smile at him.

His head drops down to his chest, his shoulders shaking with laughter. When he looks up, there’s that wide smile that I think about all day, gums and all. He really is beautiful. He’d kill me if he knew I think he’s beautiful above anything else. But he really is. He licks his lips before his face goes serious.

“We doing this no music?”

“Just you baby,” I say trying not to smile.

He nods at himself before shaking out his limbs like he’s gearing up for a fight. His hips start to move first, swiveling in a circle. He rolls his body, pulling off his T-shirt at the same time. I’m torn between swooning and laughing hysterically. His lips move like he’s mouthing a song that’s playing in his head, his brows wrinkling in concentration. Jay swings the shirt in the air before slinging it my way.

I can’t help the cackle that escapes my lips as it lands on my face. I move it aside to see he’s still concentrating on his dance. His hips shimmy out of his joggers and fall to the floor leaving him in his dark boxers.

“Ok, Ok,” I laugh as his thumb hooks into the waistline of the underwear.

“Did I do good?” He smiles at me.

“Yeah, you did good. Come,” I beckon him to climb on my bed. I’ve come to like him in my bed better than his. We seem average here in my apartment, and I prefer that more than anything else. Here in the comfort of my worn in springs and curtains that blocked any semblance of light just how I like it, he’s irrevocably mine. My bed’s smaller, my air a little drier, there’s a hump in my mattress, still, it’s home with Jay.

I watch him climb the short distance, his muscles flexing. He holds his body above mine, his face so close I can see the faint hairs on his upper lip that he’ll shave in the morning. His forehead drops to my shoulder.

“I missed you,” he says. I’ve seen him this morning and every night beforehand but I understand him. There’s a contented comfortability we’d developed a long time ago. He’s not always here, but I feel him like he is. I know that he is a phone call away and that’s enough. ��Today felt like eggshells constantly chipping away more and more every time I thought about texting him.

I trace my fingers over his high cheekbones. The way he’s looking at me, I can’t help but want to fall in love with him all over again from start to finish. The way I feel about him, the way we feel about each other, it’s expansive, making my chest feel so wide. I think about all the things we’ve done together, all the times we’d skipped classes back home just so we could go to his tournaments. We have always been a little bit together with the way we are, testing the fragile boundaries of our relationship.

“Thanks for the roses,”I say, kissing his cheek. He turns his head, taking my mouth. His tongue moves against mine so softly that I melt against him. He pulls away leaning his forehead against mine.

“No more fighting,” he tells me.

“We weren’t fighting,” I lie.

Jay shakes his head smiling at me.

“We’re going to always get into it, Jay. We just need to know where it stops,”

He raises an eyebrow at me. I already know what he’s going to say. “This morning, you didn’t want to see me, understandably. What changed,”

“Someone asked me to pass on her number to you today. I might have gotten jealous,”

“You? Jealous? After all the shit you gave me,”

“It wasn’t drag you out the club jealous, Jay. It was, you’re mine and I’m a hundred and ten percent sure she’d still try to fuck you if given the chance,”

“And that made you not mad at me anymore?” He guesses.

“No, it made me understand that the dynamic of our relationship is not the same anymore. There are boundaries and rules people abide by in relationships. And just because we’ve known each other forever doesn’t mean we’re exempt from these expectations,”

I watch Jay’s eyes flick to my lips before he decides to actually kiss me. He’s so soft and sweet, a side of him I’m not quite used to. Of course, he ruins it a second later.

“Sometimes, y/n, you just talk so much and I have no idea what you’re talking about,”

I roll my eyes and fall onto my pillow. He’s close, using his arms to hover over my body.

“You are such an asshole,” I laugh at him. “You’re an asshole and you don’t give a shit either,”

Jay laughs too before dipping his head and kissing the corner of my mouth. “I’m kidding. I get it, and you’re right. The way I acted, it won’t happen again,”

“Ok, cool. Now that that’s out the way, I want one more thing tonight,”

He raises an eyebrow. “What,”

I lean in close to him. “I want you to fuck me like you did last night,”

He drops his head against my shoulder. “You really are my fucking dream come true,” he laughs slightly.

I feel his words deep in my bones. I want to be his dream come true. I want to be everything he wants. I hope I am, because I know for sure he’s the one I’m supposed to be with. His mouth moving on my shoulder brings goosebumps to my bare skin.

When he pulls back, he looks deathly serious. His eyes darken, the set of his jaw harden. He’s so fucking hot, I want to burn this image of him in my head. I know for a fact I’ve never been more attracted to another person in my life.

“Lay on your stomach, Y/n. Put that ass in the air,”

I do as I’m told. We separate so I can lie with my chest pressed into my mattress, my knees drawn up so that my bare behind sticks up in the cool air. I can feel his eyes on me. I feel exposed. Like he’s seeing too much of me. His hand smooths over my back, up so that his fingers curl around my neck. His hips press against me. The only thing separating us is the thin cloth of his boxers.

I move my hips, grinding against the bulge that presses exactly where I need him to be. I feel him start to harden against me. I’m pulsing, salivating, every nerve in my body is lit up ready for whatever he’s going to give to me. He feels perfect and he’s not even inside me yet.

“Don’t wait,” I say, the side of my face pressed into my pillow. “I want you now,”

The fingers on my neck reach round teasing my lips.

“Open,” he instructs.

He sets two fingers against my tongue. When he draws I close my lips around them, my tongue swirling. He releases a sigh, pulling them free.

He pushes the two fingers against my entrance, before pulling back and entering me again. His fingers move against me so slowly that I can feel him everywhere. He’s insanely good at what he does, pulling sound from my lips in deep moans.

He bends over me, his lips coming against my shoulder. His fingers continue to work, his free arm comes around me to hold me up. My knees start to give out but he has me, pulling me tight against his chest.

“Come on baby,” he says against my skin. I don’t want to cum yet; not without him inside me.

“Not without you,” I say, my voice shaky.

His hand moves against me faster. He’s not giving me a choice. His knuckles touch my clit with each flick of his wrist and I’m falling fast. My breath comes out rough as my knees finally decide they can’t take it anymore. I collapse onto my stomach, shuddering around him.

“Jay, please,”

“What do you want, Y/n,”

“You,” I beg. I feel him move behind me. He reaches beside me to pull out a foil Square from my night table.

Without warning, he falls into me, quick and hard. His hips move against mine so roughly that I’m moving up my mattress. He steadies me with hands gripping my ass, kneading my flesh with his hands. Without warning, his hand comes down hard against my skin. The sound is followed by my moans into the pillow.

“You feel so fucking good, baby,” he says through clenched teeth.

He doesn’t feel close enough. I reach back, searching for his hand. I pull it so that his body covers mine. Our skin is slippery, flushed like we’re running miles. He feels so good I don’t think I can last any longer than the next few seconds.

“Oh fuck,” I say as I feel myself start to cum again. I shake around him. He continues to move his hips roughly against me. The arm I’ve pulled around me holds my chest like he’s holding himself down to earth with me.

He squeezes at my flesh, his fingertips hard against my skin. His mouth touches my shoulder and neck every few seconds. He makes rough grunts like he’s lost somewhere. I’m spent, ready to drop down on to my bed but he holds me still.

“Shit,” he calls out. He falls on me, his chest moving rapidly against my back.

We lay still for minutes, catching our breaths. Jay’s fingers smooth my hair out of my face. He reaches for my hand, intertwining our fingers while we lay together.

He gets up too soon. He disposes of the condom and brings another hot cloth to clean me up. He climbs into bed beside me again.

My phone lights up on my table. It’s Bora. She’s sent me a screenshot of some gossip blog post.

“Shit,” I curse.

“You ok? What’s wrong?” His arm wraps around my waist, pulling me against his body. He sounds exhausted, his face pressed into my back.

I look at my phone one more time before handing it back to him. I can’t read the article but it’s easy to pick my name out in among the symbols. Right below it, a blurry photo of Jay and I outside of the club pressed tightly together. No one can see my face, but it’s obvious Jay had his tongue down someone’s throat, and I’m guessing it’s finally confirmed to be me.

“Jay Park’s new girlfriend Y/n, sources say the two have only been seeing each other for a few weeks but are already in a serious relationship. The couple were first seen at Henz nightclub this past weekend,”

Jay sits up and hands the phone back to me.

“I mean, I’m not surprised,” I sigh looking up at my ceiling.

“This can be from anybody. We haven’t kept it from any of our friends,”

“No, no this was too quick. I know who this came from. I met with Elise earlier today, she has friends on all of these online blogs,”

“I thought you guys were friends,”

I shrug. “Not really. She likes you. Or rather she wants to fuck you. Regardless, I told her it’s not going to happen,”

“And she leaked information because she’s mad?” He asks. “What is she, fifteen?”

I roll my eyes and pull him to lay again. His arms come around me, pulling me against his chest. I’m not worried. I refuse to let anything she does affect me and my life. So what if people know I’m dating Jay. We’ve been seen more than once together at parties, though even then some people assumed. Even if it’s confirmed, it doesn’t affect anything. We won’t let it.

“She’ll get over it,” I say.

“If you don’t have a problem, then neither do I,” Jay tells me. “But you’ll let me know if it becomes an issue, ok baby?”

I kiss his neck and nod in agreement. I’m not too worried. I’m annoyed but there’s hardly any damage done.

“Let’s order food,” he suggests.

“You read my mind. You go ahead and wake me when it gets here,”

“All you do is sleep,” he scoffs. I watch him stand and stretch. He’s so lean, and muscular, and pretty. And mine. I smile at myself. If I wanted to I know I could have him back inside me within seconds. At some point, I have to draw a line no matter how difficult it is to force myself to live outside of fucking my hot man every minute.

“I’m worn out. Blame yourself,” I say wrapping my arms around his abandoned pillow.

He pulls his boxers on. “Oh, you thought we was done? You not getting any more sleep for the night. Rest up, baby,”

Anticipating rolls in my stomach but I roll my eyes at him pretending that I’m not eager to have him on top of me.

“Feed me first,” I tell him.

His lips pull into a devastating smirk, his eyebrow raises. “I’ll definitely feed you something,”

He leaves me watching him, my appetite for food replace with an appetite for his skin. He thinks he’s so slick. I have tons of tricks that I haven’t shown him yet and I think it’s time to bring them out.

#jay park #aomg #h1ghrmusic #jay park imagine #RTF mini #rtf 5

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portuguesefairygodmother-blog · 6 years

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I actually forgot as to how I wrote the character drafts before but I’ll just speak from my heart. And I… don’t know from where to begin.

I think I should go back and check the older ones as I’m pretty sure I cussed the hell out of Asshole 1.0 there. 😂

Okay… so… I’m listening to Fortress by Bear’s Den and it’s like this unannounced Nykova song in my head and this was a bad idea. 😂 Emotions.

You know how you said last night that you thought it was over for Charmed until Jaden?

Well, I didn’t have anything like the ‘core of my soul’ before I had Nova. And I didn’t have anyone to make her heart a mess (in the best ways, obviously) before well, him.

So it had always been over for me/Nova until you/he came in.

You know also how you said that you felt guilty that wish you were everywhere to pamper me everywhere and I realised something… I’m not everywhere. I’m just on Nova. (And another place is coming up on the next draft so I’ll leave it to that.) So I don’t really need everywhere. And I don’t want to put that pressure on you so you really don’t need to be everywhere. I also realise how selfish in ways that makes me. I don’t know if it’s selfish. Dependent. Yearning. Longing. And it scared the life out of me.

I’m not sure whether to let Nova let the reins to talk about this or I should. Maybe I should.

When you were talking about the Notebook and the fights… well, it near triggered me or it has after I shoved it down but it scared me. Because Nykova fight. They have their share of madness like that as well. And yeah, I know there maybe just similarities or so but it isn’t the same but it still… makes me insecure. When you say you don’t enjoy it much, the fights and all. But obviously fights are not meant to be enjoyed and I don’t enjoy them either but it solidified a question I kept meaning to phrase during all our conversations but the right words never came — did the fights take away all enjoyment from them for you? I don’t even think they were fights but yeah.

But I also remember everything you’ve said before, from Nyk and from yourself and I don’t let it get to me. The insecurities or such thoughts.

I know I’m overly sensitive about everything there. But… hopefully there comes a day where she can explain it to him more. I’ve never had so much to lose, everything to lose. I don’t know how my heart got tangled up in Nova like it did and I don’t know how (I mean I know) it got tangled up in Nyk. And I know the I love you may not seem like as much of a huge deal but for me, it’s as equally shocking as a proposal.

But obviously, you’re changing a lot of things. He is changing and has changed a lot of things.

As open as she is, she never really talks about feelings all that much. I guess she gets that from me. But then again, I don’t feel at the intensity she does. I don’t feel at all. So whatever she’s feeling, it’s like I’m feeling all of that and those feelings are raging in my body.

You know… I never told anyone before you that I watched the Royals. Or anyone before you as to how much Matt+Elektra meant to me. And I mean, ANYONE.

I don’t usually bring up my passions as I don’t want others to water it down or just… I don’t know. I don’t reveal the closest things to my heart.

I don’t know why I didn’t put in Jaspenor before into Nykova than from the day I did. Even though I saw the eerie similarities from way before. But I put on the courage and posted. Just as a mere gif. And then you came to me so joyously about it and just spoke everything I thought of — their similarities, and associating Eleanor with me and I didn’t tell you this before but I think I cried that day. I’m starting to get teary again now thinking on it but especially when you, by yourself, began sharing those videos and a part of me just blasted open which I’m eternally grateful for.

You saw me, somehow.

Saw her.

And I’m just… really grateful.

Same for Matt+Elektra.

You know how “anti love” I am but there are certain (and very few) things/ships that make me want love.

Jaspenor is up there. Especially because of how in my skin Eleanor is and I’d just really like someone to love me like Jasper does. I want that. Them. Someone to see past all the nightmares and the mess and see what’s inside or what could be. Same for Matt and Elektra. Do you remember how I kept saying I was so happy that the show did them justice and so much more? I just remember seeing them and those parts of my heart that are/were long gone just cracked to the surface.

Happened each episode with the Defenders. Happens each Monday, which is why I’m mostly very volatile during that day.

And by some fortune, blessing. I somehow have both of these in him. And so much more. Nykyrian’s story itself got me extremely bad and I never told you, but I honestly can’t believe you gave me his heart to hold. Me, I can understand, but a firestorm like Nova?

She’s walking catastrophe and I just wonder... how can you not want someone who’s just... more than that?

And I don’t want to break that trust. Or him. Or myself for that fact.

Did I mention I started crying somewhere along the way? It’s only gonna get worse with Dagger’s draft. 😂

But I’m insecure, yes. I’m scared. She’s scared.

We, she hasn’t had everything to lose ever before.

What if I rushed things by saying how I felt? What if I ask for too much? What if I’ve ruined everything? Will I ever get to keep this love?

But I’m also adamant in not losing any of it. Ever. So I’d ask for patience but you’ve already given me that. And more than that.

So thank you. For him.

And you, Saint Nykyrian, thank you for being with Nova until this day and never giving up on her. Sometimes she wished you would to spare you from her hurt or the disappointment she’s likely to bring to you. (Did I mention I’m crying?) But you never did. By honestly the patience of a saint. You inspire her to be a better person (or better in general and just not want to die 24/7 as she wants to live by you, with you. With an intensity I honestly feel like drugging her for as it gives me a headache.) in ways you can’t understand and she hasn’t learned to express yet but thank you for seeing her. Seeing through her. Holding her and finding her.

Both of us.

You saved her, by inspiring her to sing, write, speak, be less of a mess. To live.

I’d have written her off if you hadn’t come along.. or more than that, if you hadn’t stayed.

You’re still an asshole though, you ass.

But we love you.

In morte veritas.

(Maybe we need to find you something more optimistic. But hey, goes with who you said you fell in love with. 😂)

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