#trauma for ts

[glitter-lisp]

whatever u don't don't think about tumblr user gayleafpool being stuck with a tattoo as a permanent reminder of the anon who harassed their friends and loved ones for years....... 😭

#angsty #angst #emo #pain #heartbreak #sadness #😭 #cry #crying #sad #torture for ts #trauma for ts #blorbo from my dashboard

[thecoffeelorian]

......

Things I need to have addressed in the last 3 episodes:  The backlogged laundry list of health issues Crosshair's going to have for the rest of his life--brain trauma; induced seizures; ion-induced cancer (if that’s even a thing); having something emotional triggered by explosions; fearing punishment from even the most caring of people; etc...

Things I’m probably going to get instead:

WAR.  TERRIBLE WAR.

#random status update #the bad batch #tbb crosshair #sure grandma let's get you back to bed #lmaaaaaaaaaaooooo #trauma for ts

[whisperthatruns]

                Summer

At the edge of the orchard, amid shadow and light              snaking not like snakes as they move

but like snakes as they slough their skins             so that the self left behind and the self moving on

appear, at enough distance, sometimes              up close, without inspection, identical, I saw

a baby bird, dead, or dying, that the ants had begun              to dismantle, mouthful by mouthful, like a lie

from a belief, and I thought, though not              entirely true except insofar as truth is, or is

required, that the mother should’ve saved her              child, shouldn’t have expected the child to save itself

so that, inevitably, the mother could be saved              from the inevitable, that which will, by its will, against

our will, occur and recur, but I knew, having been              a baby bird left for dead, for death, that nobody

is saved or safe, that survival, defined as the fact              of continuing to live or exist, typically in spite

of an incident, is, by that definition, simply              the opposite of death, and that what’s not so

simple is knowing what death is, how sudden              and often it occurs and recurs, how it can seem

at any point, any distance, like living or existing . . .              I want to see the world as it is. As it is, there, then, alone

at the edge of the orchard, amid light and shadow,              I had no idea if I’d know, for certain, it was the world.

Paul Tran, from “Year of the Monkey,” All the Flowers Kneeling (Penguin Books, 2022)  

#paul tran #year of the monkey #all the flowers kneeling #poetry #animal death for ts #mothers for ts #trauma for ts

[ofyorkshire]

psychology + mental health deep dive !

QUICK FACTS ,

diagnoses: i don't know what doctors of the early '80s would have diagnosed bj with, especially given that he's gay and possibly trans (genderfluid?), but imo, bj has severe c-ptsd and possibly schizophrenia (though there's not a lot of evidence for the latter; the visual and auditory hallucinations he experiences could just be a symptom of his c-ptsd and drug abuse, which is how i portray him, since i'm not confident that i can properly portray someone suffering with schizophrenia). there's probably more, but i'm not a psychologist and wouldn't know where to begin with bj.

triggers: a better question would probably be "what doesn't potentially trigger him?", because bj lives in a near-constant state of dissociation and hyper-vigilance. but the smell of damp earth or decaying leaves, gunshots, knives, sex, and the sound of large dogs barking are his most common triggers.

positive coping skills:  few, but he has found ways to help ground himself through little personal rituals like touching something cold when he feels far away, or listening to music when his auditory hallucinations get too loud. personal superstitions like counting to seven or drawing sevens for good luck help ease some of his anxiety, as well as dancing and painting.

negative coping skills:  substance abuse is probably bj's worst both because of their affects on his physical health as well as his mental health; the high or drunk helps keep him in a dissociative, numb, or euphoric state when the high is "good", but abusing drugs and alcohol has also worsened his hallucinations and paranoia. he also often engages in risky sex and occasionally borderline suicidal behavior.

attachment style:  disorganized-avoidant / fearful-avoidant

love language:  (to give) touch and to give / (to receive) touch and words of affirmation

myers briggs / mbti: i've tried to figure this out before and i'm honestly not sure i know, even taking the test. there's "barry james", who... i think is maybe his more authentic self, and then there is "bj" who is not inauthentic, necessarily, but certainly is more of a mask than who bj really is. the problem, though, is that i don't know who bj would be without his trauma, and i'm not sure who he is with it, because it changes depending on how he needs to survive. if i had to guess, i'd say he's probably an infx or isfx? maybe?

HISTORY EXPLORATION ,

are their diagnoses formal ( via a doctor, therapist, etc. ) or informal ( self diagnosis, a hunch, unrealized, etc. )     he supposedly gets a formal diagnoses sometime in the early '80s (?), but considering that the hospital releases bj at what i would consider his absolute worst state mentally, idk how correct the diagnoses was.

have they ever been treated / medicated?     yes, but. well. see above.

have they ever been hospitalized or treated on an inpatient basis?   yes.

how old were they when they first started experiencing / realizing symptoms? around 9 or 10 was when bj really began to sink into himself and his inner-monologue switched from first person to third as a way of distancing himself from his trauma. after that, his mental health dive-bombed.

do they have a family history of mental illness? likely. but we don't know enough about bj's mom to say.

how was mental health handled / discussed in the family / community?    none at all. at most, reverend laws would call him "troubled" because of his mother at best, and at worst blame "sin" on bj's deteriorating mental health.

what are their thoughts on mental health / their diagnosis?   negatively, when he does think about it. angry, mostly, and ashamed. but then he also just doesn't think about it, if he can help it.

in what ways has their diagnosis shaped their life or experiences?  n/a. except for his doctors potentially making him worse because of how they treated him after his diagnoses, bj doesn't think about his diagnosis and doesn't find it helpful or useful.

SYMPTOMS: note that all of the below are, on their own, normative and typical aspects of human functioning. they become “symptoms” when they last longer than “normal” or when they pose a significant impact on someone’s life / functioning.

BOLD  all that are present,  ITALICIZE  those that are resolved or in the history.

depression.    anxiety.   panic attacks.    dissociation.   derealization.   depersonalization.    suicidal ideation.    self harm.    homicidal ideation.    psychosis.    auditory hallucinations.    visual hallucinations.    delusions.    mania.    hypomania.   racing thoughts.    hyperactivity.    attention difficulty.   flashbacks.    nightmares.   hyperarousal.    hypoarousal.    hypersexuality.    hyposexuality.    psychopathy.   risky behavior.    catatonia.    somatic / bodily concerns.    mutism.    phobia.    agoraphobia.    hoarding.    obsessions.    compulsions.    body dysmorphia.    hair picking.    skin picking.     amnesia.   illness anxiety / hypochondria.    sensory loss.    speech difficulty.    comprehension difficulty.    communication difficulty.    tics.    defiant behavior.    irritable mood.    vindictiveness.     aggression.    pyromania.    kleptomania.    paranoia.    attention seeking.    narcissism.   avoidance.   dependency.    pica.    rumination.    food restriction.    food binging.    purging.   soiling the bed (sometimes; struggles mostly when in an especially bad mental place).    insomnia.    fatigue.    sexual dysfunction.    delirium.    developmental delays.

explanations / elaborations on any of the above symptoms:

i don't think i could properly explain all of that in a single post, and i think most of it would be far too triggering anyway without a readmore. if curious, feel free to ask, but this is mostly for my reference anyway.

tagged by: no one, i just wanted to fill this out for bj. tagging: anyone who would like to

#there's too much to tag this as uh #self harm mention for ts #trauma for ts #abuse for ts #i really don't think i need to tag everything considering i don't go into detail anywhere but still. #lived to tell the tale [headcanons];

[flyatahighergame-arch]

To Seto Kaiba, do you remember your parents, what were they like? How did they die? Does Mokuba remember them?

       “Hn. I was born Seto Takahashi and my father was a banker, my mother was a stay at home mom, I was six when they died. But yes, I remember them. Father had been... not exactly cold, but he wasn’t warm or open. But he was always around and ready to read Mokuba and I bedtime stories, he took time off work for my birthday once and took me to the local zoo.”     A pause “It happened rather quickly and the memories are... admittedly quite vague, but I remember a loud... car crash sound and a lot of blood and they were on our lawn in a puddle of blood as somebody sped off....”         Another pause. 

      “Mokuba remembers nothing, he wasn’t even two when they died. I stepped up and protected him in that orphanage because all we had was each other. In many ways I was his father more than I was ever his brother and it’s better that way, he doesn’t have to deal with remembering and wishing they were still around.” 

#➢ ʏᴏᴜ'ʟʟ ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴀʏ ɪᴛ ᴛᴇᴀʀs ᴍᴇ ᴜᴘ ɪɴsɪᴅᴇ ᴛᴏ sᴇᴇ ʏᴏᴜ (in character) #➢ ʏᴏᴜ'ʟʟ ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴀʏ ɪᴛ ᴛᴇᴀʀs ᴍᴇ ᴜᴘ ɪɴsɪᴅᴇ ᴛᴏ sᴇᴇ ʏᴏᴜ (headcanons) #death for ts #trauma for ts #car crash for ts #//Hint: It wasn't a carcrash. Kaiba's mind is PROTECTING him

[deservedgrace]

One of the wildest things about end times anxiety/sadness at least in my experience was that you weren't allowed to express it in any significant way. Expressing any type of dissatisfaction with the end times coming soon (because everyone would take any natural disaster or war or bad thing in the world as indication that the end times are upon us) was met with you being shamed for not trusting god, not trusting his timing, for being haughty and prideful thinking you could possibly know the day and hour when not even the angels know, and don't you want jesus to come back? It's a good hopeful thing and your anxiety and fear and sadness and any other negative feelings are signs you don't love and trust the lord enough. It is completely twisted to not only tell children the world is ending soon, but to also force them to look forward to it.

#ex christian #religious trauma #ex cult #child indoctrination #end times for ts #cult tactics #you ever .. be doing good with religious trauma mostly but something pops up and you feel like you're back at square one #i know it's part of the trauma it's just.... frustrating

[galedekarios]

what it feels like going into gale's tag for good art, meta or hcs

#post 1: actually ast*rion/tav with jealous gale #post 2: gale mansplains to my sorcerer!!!! #post 3: ast*rion art tagged with every other char tag for 'visibility' #post 4: i hate gale and i so helpfully tagged my post with every gale related tag so you can see it #post 5: bl**dw**v* #post 6: i hate gale but i fixed him by using a mod that turns him into female gale that uses an ai voice #post 7: here's me m*stra defender no1 explaining gale's trauma away #post 8-- #i hate it here #text: personal #fandom critical #discourse for ts

[beanghostprincess]

I know we Sanuso shippers sound like a broken record moving in between Skypiea, Water 7, Enies Lobby, and Sabaody, but... Those really are crucial arcs for both of them. They show their core personalities, even before their actual arcs (WCI and, hopefully, Elbaf, if Oda gives my boy Usopp all the attention he deserves there) and they're always together. They're paired together in each of those and they're together to witness each other's important moments and growth. And I just think it's something so beautiful. It's not exactly that they have crucial scenes, it's the fact that they're together to support each other in them.

#idk i just find it so beautiful like #wci is a crime for not having usopp but the way luffy acts in wci is different from how usopp would've reacted too #and i think that being together in their journey pretty much since the beginning gives such a beautiful perspective to their relationship #they're not invasive of each other's issues and trauma and they don't demand to be in each other's space. they just... they just are #it's like it's just obvious that if sanji is somewhere usopp will be there too #like they just exist next to each other #and this happened more pre-ts but it's quite obvious in gyojin island and punk hazard too that they're written to be together #and i am very sad #i love them a lot #one piece #black leg sanji #usopp #sanuso

[delimeful]

i re-read lmmr and. it was so angsty but i kept making myself laugh bc like. after theyre rescued its gonna be fucking HILARIOUS if patton and logan dont realize theyve bonded like

virgil, tired, casually flopping beside roman on the space couch and leaning on his side: heyo, roman

roman without looking up from what hes doing, wrapping an arm around him: great to see you, virgil.

patton & logan, shook: are. are both of you two ok.

patton & logan: ... whatcha got there?

roman, with virgil sleeping slumped against him, totally relaxed: *sips his drink* a smoothie?

patton & logan:

#you're so right this is hilarious to think about #when your friend with human trauma gets abducted by humans and somehow comes back way more chill about them than before #asks #anonymous #wibar #ts virgil #ts patton #ts roman #ts logan #queue #lmmr

[candlewinds]

Nobody comes to Hanyang without a story to tell, and nobody leaves Hanyang without a story.

JOSEON ATTORNEY (2023)

#joseon attorney #kdramaedit #kdramadaily #joseonattorneyedit #did they make this look borderline unwatchable in the trailers so that I'd be pleasantly surprised because if so it worked 😭 #they have dohwan trauma nightmare crying in ep 2. like 'rest assured in case anyone was worried...this man is still miserable' #ty I needed that actually #long post for ts #kdrama

[reanimatedgh0ul]

this is LITERALLY their dynamic in a nutshell

#they're literally both repressed™ #the different is that lance is stigmatized as someone who 'obviously has issues bc why else would he be acting out' #vs ilana who also has trauma but bc she comes across as someone who's seemingly well put together #ppl just assume that she's fine actually and she's nothing AT ALL like her brother bc well she turned out fine right (WRONG) #that's not even getting into the fact she has what is basically the entire weight of the world on her shoulders #her father literally tells her that if he DIES she's galaluna's last hope #the whole reason why they had to flee galaluna and the earth being threatened by giant monsters now is bc of HER #literally everything goes back to her and given how lance is the mission takes top priority and he reminds them why they're here #which don't get me wrong i get that but at the same time i don't imagine being CONSTANTLY #reminded of that by a guy who's practically the same age as you and is doubling as your personal bodyguard/brother isn't exactly great #basically both of them are trans teens and are (SEVERELY) traumatized #what did you think the Ts in titan stand /j #sym bionic titan #robi rambles

[whisperthatruns]

               1

Waking again to the spartan furnishing---brass knobs and coat hooks, curtain

moth-gnawed and yellowing, plastic mattress atop a twin frame, photograph of me and my mother turned away, book from a class

on empire and literature that told the story of a story- teller who evades the end awaiting her

each morning by giving the king not her body but her imagination each night for a thousand and one nights---what humiliated me

as I relived my death in that room without sunrise wasn’t my desire for light but my desire for more darkness.

Paul Tran, from “Scheherazade / Scheherazade,” All the Flowers Kneeling (Penguin Books, 2022)

#paul tran #scheherazade scheherazade #all the flowers kneeling #poetry #trauma for ts

[juneboat]

something i just noticed about ts!underswap that i love:

koffin k. and crossbones are like complete inverses of batman and the joker; instead of a super-dark deadly rivalry between a bat-themed superhero and a clown-themed supervillain, it's a super-lighthearted goofy "rivalry" between a bat-themed "supervillain" and a comedian "superhero"

it's a hilarious dichotomy and i'm so glad i finally realized it it's so obvious once you think about it

#june's undertale brainrot posts #ts!underswap #plus they do kinda have something fruity going on #which i'm aware is also much the same with batman and the joker #except koffin and crossbone's relationship is built entirely off of completely silly pranks and gags rather than. uh. Trauma

[exvangelical]

“[the nuke we dropped on japan] will be NOTHING compared to what happens to those who reject jesus!” AND YOU’RE OKAY WITH THAT???? YOU’RE OKAY WITH ETERNAL TORMENT WORSE THAN NUCLEAR FALLOUT??????

#the xtian god is capricious at best and evil at worst #text #religious trauma #hell for ts

[deservedgrace]

I forgot that I legitimately believed I wouldn't grow up to be an adult when I was a kid because of rapture theology and end times beliefs... and my church rarely even focused on that (from what I remember). It was just that ingrained in the culture.

#ex cult #ex christian #religious trauma #child indoctrination #end times for ts

[randomnameless]

Sorry Edelcultists, but Supreme Leader doesn't have ptsd, Rhea and Dimitri do. Why do they lie.

?

Supreme Leader has nightmares about it in her C support, iirc ?

But yeah, I'm sure there used to be (still are?) some takes around saying Supreme Leader had PTSD when the other two don't, and they're just cray-cray which was... a thing to say lol.

You can prop and talk/defend your character without needing to shoot another character to make your fave look better in comparison, alas, from some devoted fans, this is pure nonsense.

I remember the "oh well Rhea's people were genocided 1000 years ago she had time to get over it in the present" takes, and they were so ridiculous they really made me laugh.

#anon #replies #granted Supreme Leader's traumatism only appears in supports #when the other two's traumas are displayed on screen #rhea breaking down in CF or Dimitri in his post TS iterations #some people just don't understand trauma olympics suck and they're not a good way to determine if a character is better than the other #'she suffered more' your point? #fandom woes #FE16