#to 'well maybe they dont feel the same and it'd be weird to bring it up now'

[poisonouspastels]

I need to talk about Minecraft AU for a sec and how the difference between our world and their world makes for some of the most humorous but also interesting differences in how people act about certain subjects.

Like the trans thing right. Steve and Rana are both trans I've talked about that before. And neither of them are on hormone replacement or anything (there is an in universe explanation as to why Steve has a beard though I promise I can talk about that if anyone wants) but like that's fine bc it literally Doesn't Matter to them or anyone else. Like as spawned players they already don't have any pre-existing gender roles or ideas of what something "should" be so gender and presentation is what they make of it and there's no real solid idea in anyone's mind about how a "boy" or "girl" behaves or looks like. These are labels that exist but they barely mean anything. It also helps that any preexisting culture that WOULD have ideas of this was almost entirely destroyed like 5000 years ago (thanks Groda) so it matters even less than it already did.

And its funny bc the only two people alive from that era, White Eyes and Groda also just don't care. Groda maybe asks why Rana's voice sounds deeper once and nearly gets torn apart by Alex bc of it (Rana isn't offended or anything she just has a defensive girlfriend), bc she doesn't really understand because she never experienced anything like this first hand but very quickly comes to understand it and accept it. And on the other hand White Eyes is just like "I've seen weirder things than this" which yeah. Yeah honestly I think the person who was previously one with the undead would not care about gender in the grand scheme of things.

And then u have Kai which I've joked before that they may as well have been spawned in nonbinary. They rlly just said "I'm not really anything" and everyone was like yeah makes sense I vibe with it. Good for u.

Steve and Rana are both fairly open about having been the opposite genders previously (because that's how they view their experiences and that's valid!) and don't really shy away from the subject but also never really have much reason to talk about it since there's rarely a need to. In the modern day pretty much everyone who met them had met them post-transition. Even Alex had met them just before Steve started growing in his beard. The only people who ever knew them as Adam and Eve were Efe and Sunny but they never really thought it was weird or anything. Like the weirdest part to them was Steve saying he got his epiphany from seeing some guy in the distance on a foggy day who looked vaguely like him but that's its own subject manner that they aren't going to pry on.

Also Steve did DIY top "surgery" previously with a sword but we aren't going to talk about how messy that was for everyone involved.

#minecraft #minecraft au mastertag #apologies for my trans ramblings. how i get to approach these subject matters in the AU is just fun #and i needed to get some thoughts out #unrelated fun fact that i think most people here dont know: Steve and Alex were actually the first two to be in a committed relationship #not Steve and Rana like most would (rightfully) expect #this is because despite the fact that the two have literally know eachother for their entire lives #they're both really bad at being honest with themselves. #for years it was 'i like this person but i dont know how to tell them' #to 'well maybe i only FEEL like i like them because i dont know anyone else that well' #to 'well maybe they dont feel the same and it'd be weird to bring it up now' #you've heard of slow burn now get ready for what those two had going on #Alex when integrated into the household and months had passed actually had enough confidence to ask #here's the funny part though. she had assumed that Steve and Rana WERE dating already (and was cool with it obviously) #they were not. #so u can imagine how funny it is for Steve to hear 'Your girlfriend is pretty' out of Alex's mouth bc of that #She's more shocked that they're NOT dating already they live in the same house they've known eachother for literally their entire existence #they are like so stupidly affectionate with eachother to boot #'And you've known her for how long??' 'I mean... about 10 years?' 'DUDE.' #its actually agonizing but on the bright side it is what got the polycule started eventually #I would not be surprised if Sunny and Efe placed bets on if/when it would eventually happen

[nalpurex]

i got souyo brainworms again and i gotta share some thoughts i have

this ones a long one so ill put a 'keep reading' thing here just in case yall dont wanna scroll past a wall of text

basically some headcanons about a healthy mix of chad narukami and normal yu, injecting loads of gap moe into this guy

(and it eventually devolves into some weird semi-story because my brains really spiralling here)

okok so, hear me out, chad narukami isnt that bad as an idea...? maybe as a more calm iteration, just another layer to yu

in the p4 manga, we get to see some of yu's backstory. (its been a while since ive read it so i might get some details wrong but) his parents are very busy people, always working and moving around, so yu's always moving around with them

because of this, hes a very independent but also lonely kid. poor guy doesnt talk much with his own mom and dad, and he never really have a good enough chance to form lasting friendships

so when he moves to inaba and starts making friends there, hes like 'oh i really want to keep these guys around...' so he starts putting up a bit of a persona (hah), some cool, unfazed guy that everyone can rely on thinking thats what people might like more. to his credit, it works pretty well, but its a bit stifling for yu himself. hes never had this many friends though, so he'll keep it up

we all know yosuke admires him quite a fair bit as is, just as a dependable friend and a strong leader. he looks up to yu in these aspects, thinking hes basically the perfect guy. (and lets never unpack that thought.) talented, charming, 'gets all the ladies', that kind of stuff

at some point its just the two of them, maybe walking home from school or something, yu gets pretty comfortable and his facade slips a little. maybe he says something completely silly, or heavens forbid theres a stray cat along the road! ("awww look at the little guy, cmeree, pspsps- oh- ahem- uh, its pretty cute...") it surprises yosuke quite a bit. he's thinking about it a lot as they part ways, it was... definitely a new side to his partner, but its also not a bad thing...

after that, yosuke starts noticing more small things about yu. whenever he invites anyone to share his lunch, its always something they like. whenever the IT are talking, he makes sure no one feels left out. he likes cats, a lot more than hes willing to show, and he loves nanako a whole lot too. his partner's... a bit of a softie under that calm and collected vibe, isnt he?

(alternatively, it'd be really funny if the entire IT knew? like "yeah, hes got a straight face all the time and sparkles fly around him whenever he strikes a pose, but hes got a dedicated schedule for hanging out with us and hes always asking when we're free. hes a big puppy, really.")

anyways, yosuke tries to encourage him to show more of this other side of him. stuff like "c'mon, we'll think you're cool either way!" and yu at first is a little hesitant, so yosuke suggests he just try it out with him

he feels some pride about it, because hes the first to learn about this side of yu! his partner trusts him the most, hes the most comfortable around him! (whats this strange other feeling? hm. dont like that.)

yu takes a little more time with the others, but theyre very welcoming about it nonetheless. specifically, they find it very charming! (making cute shapes in your bento? sewing cute stuffed toys with kanji? playing with literally every single stray cat you lay your eyes on? hell yeag.)

of course the facade doesnt completely shatter, because some parts of it are still true to yu. its just that he'll now crack the dumbest joke youve heard in your life with the same old straight face

(aaand now to derail for the sappy stuff huhuhu)

because yosuke's usually the first to be exposed to whatever new shenanigans yu's up to, eventually he starts getting some... weirder things. he brings some of it up to the other IT members and he looks insane, like:

"what? he hasnt been giving you guys origami?"

"why would he? i mean itd be cool, but thats just his part-time job isnt it? hes probably sick of paper cranes!"

"cranes... haha, yeah..." (as he thinks about the row of stupid paper animals sitting on his windowsill)

yu over time starts getting real sweet with yosuke, and he kind of gets the feeling he should just... keep this to himself...? especially when he doesnt see him acting this way with anyone else, and a small part of him wants to keep it to himself. all of this, just for him.

but that would be kind of gay, wouldnt it? hes not gay, is he...? he gets pretty happy whenever yu smiles at him, whenever he does something for him, but its just because he appreciates him as his partner... right?

eventually it all comes to a head when yu invites him to that... that spot high up in inaba. (ykno the one, its got the railing and shit.)

yosuke's climbing the hill, wondering whats yu gonna tell him, and at the top he sees him already waiting there as the sun's about to set on a nice breezy day

he kinda jokes a bit about it, like "damn did you ask me to come here now for the atmosphere?" but yu's strangely quiet

so they kinda just stand in a bit of an awkward silence before yu clears his throat... and confesses to yosuke.

...

they just. stare at each other for a bit. yosuke's at a loss, heat slowly rising in his cheeks, because what the hell?

and then yu explodes into a flustered mess, bumbling about "hey yeah man you dont have to accept if you dont wanna, i was just saying things yknow? you dont really have to-"

yosuke cuts him off, sighing a little. he tells him its okay, hes kinda had a feeling he felt the same way but he wasnt ready yet... and now his partner's confessing to his face, he cant really put it off anymore, can he?

("by the way, did you plan this? like, the timing and everything?"

"i... had a hard enough time saying 'i like you' with a straight face as it was, i kind of had to..."

"... ah.")

#ive never done this kind of headcanon dumping before so it feels kind of embarrassing??? #like my attitude going into this was “hell yeah! im gonna expand on yu so much because he has a lot of potential and i adore him!” #and i came out of it thinking like how i always do #sappy fluff and making dolls kiss 🙄 #i cant even guarantee ill remember my own damn headcanons bc ive always been one to prefer lighthearted silly stuff #hence me avoiding writing dialogue when i can... especially that confession bit #eugh... #anyways i just hope yall enjoy my thoughts haha #persona 4 #souyo #yu narukami #yosuke hanamura #farts and sharts

[hearts4golbach]

The Night Shift.

Johnnie Guilbert x Fem!Reader.

Chapter 22.

my head pounded as i dug through my bag, praying i had some sort of pain killer in that damn thing. unfortunately, i didn't have shit. i leaned against the counter and texted johnnie.

me: johnniee

me: Are you up?

johnnie: yeah babe what's up

me: Are you coming tonight?

johnnie: Of course

me: Would you mind bringing something for my headache? it's starting out to be a terrible night, lol

johnnie: yeah ill head that way soon :)

me: Thank youuu

i turned off my phone. the bell on the door rang, and i greeted the customer. "Welcome in. what can i get for you?" Hearing the same repetitive phrase angered me tonight, way more than any other night. i cleared my throat in an attempt to calm myself down.

"Can i get a latte, please?" the girl requested.

i hummed. i turned around towards the espresso machine. i packed it and slid the container into the slot. i pressed the on button, expecting it to work, but it didn't. "you've got to be fucking kidding me." i said under my breath, hoping the customer didn't hear. i turned back around. "im so sorry, the espresso machine is broken."

"Oh, no worries!" she gave me an awkward smile before looking up at the menu.  "Can i get a medium vanilla cream hot coffee?"

"yes ma'am, so sorry for the inconvenience." i picked up the coffee pot, which i had made a fresh batch not long before she had come in.

she finally received her drink. she paid and left, leaving me alone in the cafe once more. i poured myself a cup of cold water and chugged it, hoping it'd dull the pain.

i discovered that the espresso machine had just unplugged, but it was still a bitch to plug back in. i opened the cabinet and moved the extra bags of coffee beans. the plugs were in the very back of the cabinets. i was torso deep into the cabinets, trying to fish the cord out from behind the small opening in the back of it whenever johnnie walked out.

i heard a chuckle slip out of his lips. "You okay over there?"

"Yeah, just trying to plug something in." i mutter as i finally reconnect everything.

i stand up and turn to find johnnie holding a small bouquet of about 5 light pink and white tulips. i purse my lips and try to hold back tears.

"Awe, it's okay, y/n." he smiled softly, coming behind the counter to hug me. i held onto him tightly, feeling as if some of my problems had washed away. he rubbed my lower back and pulled a small container of painkillers out of his back pocket. "Here are those, if you wanna take them real quick."

he kept one arm wrapped around my waist as i did. "Thank you so much," i pecked his lips, "im so glad you're here."

he pulled up a chair behind the counter to sit with me, "What's been going on?"

"It's just that nothing seems to be working. It's just been a weird night. i have a massive headache, and my temper is super short tonight. of course, the thing was unplugged, so i had to fix that. but im only an hour into the shift, and i know the rest of the night is going to be shit." i rambled, dreading the following hours.

"Can i help around the store again? maybe that'll take some shit off of your shoulders." he offered. "What all do you have to do tonight?"

"Well, take orders, obviously. i need to sweep and mop out here and go do the last of the day shift dishes, then i need to wipe down all the counters and tables. we need to take down the valentines decorations, too." i listed off all of the main tasks that came to mind.

"Where's the broom?" he asked with zero hesitation.

"Since you really wanna help, the broom is in the closet right over there." i pointed to my right, "but really, you dont have to help."

"i wanna help, love." he replied before taking out the broom and beginning to sweep the floors.

the next hour worth of orders went smoothly. surprisingly, tonight was a busier night than usual. i decided to stop complaining, as i was getting more money, the more people that came in. johnnie then wiped off all the tables and counters, leaving them spotless.

"youre actually the best." i called from across the cafe. he smiled and gave me a thumbs up before returning to the last few tables.

"You ready to take the decorations down?" he asked, wiping his forehead after tossing the dirty rag in the dirty bin.

"Yeah, let's do it." i climbed up on his shoulders, figuring it'd be best to get the hard shit to take down out of the way first.

"There's a party me and jake were invited to this weekend. Do you wanna come with me? i think tara is going, too." johnnies thumb gently rubbed my thigh.

"Uh, obviously," i stuttered. i tossed the small stack of heart cutouts onto the floor before moving on to the next one. "Why wouldn't i want to go?"

he shrugged. "i dunno."

"My parents are coming to town soon. i told my mother about you, and she wants to meet you." i mentioned. i was anxious for his response. "Do you want to?"

"Uh, yeah? of course i fucking do." he giggled.

i sighed, "i just need to warn you, im not sure if she'll like you. she's very judgemental."

"Then I'll earn it. dont worry, y/n."

"You'll earn her liking you?" i raised my eyebrow even though he couldn't see.

"Yeah, I'll find a way." he patted my upper thigh.

after i picked the last heart off of the wall, i got off of his shoulders. he placed a soft kiss on my lips. i replied, "im sure you will."

#fanfiction #fanfic #johnnie guilbert #jake and johnnie #johnnie guilbert x you #johnnie guilbert x reader #jake webber #the night shift #fluff #café #cafe aesthetic #cafe #tara yummy #hearts4golbach

[misc-obeyme]

hello again grey asmo here

Finally found here some mutuals to talk and simp, im so happy cuz my fandom is small, and a lot of people are into the show more than the books (book nerd here)

Anyway..i can stop bringing my rant too one of my fav bloggers about that one asshole of a prince of hell (we dont talk about that)

**hugs**

NSFW OM content (drank 4 cups of coffee today, and read 4 books)

Also Barbatos would totally have a two dicks, and also his tail is slimy so you know it probably be easy right... (im not a smut person, more of an angst person)

But Barbatos/Simeon this ship is soooo precious and so cute... i wanna hold them

Also wouldnt MC kinda change, like devildom air probably affect their cells make them immune to diseases in hell, and also make their eyesight better in the dark, and imagine going back to earth and eating and it taste weird.. like MC being in hell for almost 2 years..would earth go faster or slower, probably faster on earth and hell would seem slow (torture the souls)

Hello, grey Asmo!

I'm so glad you found some mutuals to talk to about your fandom! I certainly don't mind you talking about it with me, but I know it's different when the other person is in the same fandom! I hope you're able to discuss about that character at length, he sounds like trouble lol.

So okay the two dick thing... I know people have said the same about Levi... is it a tail thing? A reptile-like tail thing, anyway? Do reptiles have two dicks?! I don't know and I'm afraid to look it up lol. I'm just wondering if this concept is based on something or if it's more like those characters just give people two dick vibes.

I definitely have a ~thing~ for tails in general, though. I really go in phases with smut, like sometimes I'm obsessed and other times I don't care at all, but if I ever come across some that involves a tail, all bets are off. Especially with Barbatos because I love him so much, but yes I think the sliminess of it could definitely act as lubricant lol.

Simeon in general is another underrated character, in my opinion! As such, his ships are also underrated. But I think the Barbatos/Simeon ship certainly has fans! The thing about them is that they both like to take care of people and they each have a little found family that they care for in which there is some overlap. And at first I thought they might have a thing where they kind of compete to take care of each other, but then I realized that they would both realize they could trust the other one. I think both Simeon and Barbatos like to take care of things partly because they know they'll do it best. But then they come to see that they can rely on each other just as well and maybe they start taking breaks finally.

Oh I have thought about what would happen to MC after living the Devildom for an extended period of time.

The fact is, humans need sunlight. So they would need to at least take some kind of Vitamin D supplement. I also think it has the potential to mess up their sleep cycles, which are also dependent on the sun (unless you're me and have a sleep disorder, but you know generally speaking). I would think that if there are diseases in the Devildom that don't exist in the human world, MC would probably get a lot of them at first until their immune system built up resistance to them.

I definitely think the eyesight would be a thing. I mean think about what it'd be like if you lived underground for years and then went outside in the sun. Sometimes just going outside after being inside all day is enough to make my eyes sensitive to sunlight!

I also think it's likely that their tastes would change... or at the very least, they'd have foods from the Devildom that they miss. Or similar things in the Devildom that they think taste better than the human world equivalent.

Just more reasons why MC probably doesn't want to leave the Devildom. All these things start to make it feel more like home than the human world...

And oh I hadn't considered the time speed? I wonder if the Devildom has time zones? Or Daylight Savings Time?!? Please, no. I would lose my mind. I already exist in two different time zones, I just want a break lol.

Anyway, it's lovely as always to hear from you, grey Asmo! I hope you're having a nice day!

#I do like the concept of it going slower because it's more torture for the souls lol #that's kinda diabolical #which is fitting I suppose #obey me #grey asmo anon #misc answers

[pageofheartdj]

Omg same! It'd be so fun being the cat of a poly relationship xD

You're so right, Rosie would be happy with whatever Alastor brought back while Lucifer would shift from "that's.... sweet? Maybe?" to "ALASTOR WHAT DO YOU HAVE??". Lilith might be a bit like Alastor where it depends on the day? Idk enough about her yet!

Alastor is Absolutely a little bit feral sometimes though. He acts like he's a gentleman and Very Polite but sometimes he just needs to go out and roam if things feel too stifling and maybe brings back an arm. As a treat <3 (totally not headcanoning that he has trust issues so sometimes when things feels too sweet he causes chaos or does something they dont like to test whether they still like him)

Lucifer would probably find Rosie delightful company because she's taken over cannibal town and runs it in a more peaceful way than other towns, but sometimes he's very much reminded that she also helps people kill others so they can eat him and he's like "huh. This is. I have made choices" (he loves them anyways. He just takes a while to get used to it?)

Anyways you've made me consider a polycule I wouldn't have otherwise and it has SO much potential to be fun or silly or serious or angsty or just really really funny and that's all wonderful xD

Pfff Lucifer growing desensitized to his gifts is a win xD He is an angel, always will be, but he'll get used to his partner's... quirks in time XD (We have literally One thing about Lilith so maybe she'll enjoy the random torn piece, not to eat it like Rosie would, but appretiate the attention xD)

I love the wiki fact that he likes things tidy and clean but then go around covered in blood! Truly a beast of a mood XD (ohmygosh lOVE it!! he is NOT used being open like that so sometimes his brain SIKES him and he needs to steer chaos just to assure himself they are staying for the Weird him as well!!)

(kljkhjg love how Al and Luci both are messes in different ways while Lili and Rosie are just chilling and vibing XD)

Oh my gosh I LOVE the Rosie&Lucifer potential! Rosie is so polite and cheerful and geniune, Lucifer would really appreciate being around her, relaxing, sometimes too much, so her diet keeps catching him off-guard xD

I suprised myself xD I love poly, so finding that ultimate poly is just the best!! I do not see Lucifer separated from Lilith, nor I can stop obsessing over radioapple and then we have THE sweetest relationship between Alastor and Rosie, so it's just. Why not all of them together??? It's cute to think Rosie and Lucifer to be more reserved, while Alastor and Lilith thrive in chaos and violence(I need her to be just a smidge mad😏)

I love polycules in general, because it's so much better when you can bounce from partner to partner to not stock your every need on only one person and you can always have someone by your side without suffocating each other's personal spaces, yaknow xD And have big snuggly piles THEY RULE

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel alastor #hazbin hotel lucifer #hazbin hotel rosie #hazbin hotel lilith #and then hazbin hotel got me to like cannibalism kink XD #which fits in this show hjgh #hooboy we have half of polycule as cannibals jhg <3 #doubletrouble

[yuukei-yikes]

umm my kgpr headcanon is um... that when momo and shintaro introduces the dan to their mom (like how they come hang out at kisaragi home etc) slowly kisaragi mama realizes "these kids are going about without parents or guardians???!!!" and she gets all auntie mode when she can, like gifting them food and other stuff like clothes, but mostly food.

YEAHHHHH!!!!! I LOVE THIS HEADCANON

GOD i have so many kisaragi mama hcs. like. her husband died. she's doing badly economically to the point she has to unwillingly rely on her daughter being an idol. her brilliant son has shut himself in his room and is depressed. like this lady is kinda miserable right.

and then all of a sudden momo takes a break from being an idol?? shintaro is out of his room?? theyre... TALKING TO EACH OTHER...?? AND.... THEY BOTH HAVE FRIENDS?!?! what!!! SHE WOULD WANNA KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON!!!!

she keeps asking to meet all their buddies and that she's gonna bake and maybe they can sleep over if they want :3 momo and shintaro are like EUGH. well shintaro is. i think momo's immediately like WE NEED TO TELL MOM ABOUT THE RED EYES SITUATION 💖

i also think shintaro and momo keep arguing about it because momo wants their mom to know about the mekakushi dan and just everything that happened because. ok and she's RIGHT: momo's like. OUR MOM IS WORRIED!!! AND WE ARE BASICALLY THE ONLY ONES WITH A MOM!!! and not only are both of us involved in this but DAD IS TOO!!!

like both shintaro and momo have powers and also THEIR DAD IS STUCK IN THE DAZE. momo's so desperate to come clean to kisaragi mama bc come onnn their mom is like a super lost outsider who just wants to be close to her kids especially now that they seem so much more cheerful and are like. moving forward with their lives. but shintaro's more unwilling because. DUDE SHES GONNA LOSE HER MIND ALSO SHE WONT BELIEVE US🙄

lol i think momo brings it to Mekakushi Dan Sit Down Meeting to discuss it. like CAN I PLEASE tell my mom abt this. and shintaro keeps arguing that she won't believe them and she'll think theyre doing drugs. then ayano offers to use favoring to make her understand better (not gory parts or anything just Help Her Understand) and everyone else is like yeah we can show her our powers too :3 the dan WOULD KEEP HIDING their powers but i think they'd all see momo's point and would be willing to show them to kisaragi mama. because this is their mom and her whole family is involved and she sorta deserves answers to questions she doesn't even know she has. also everyone kind of just does whatever ayano says and ayano is like WE ARE MEETING MRS. KISARAGI RIGHT NOW

also when shintaro and momo tell their mom ok our friends are coming over and we're gonna Tell You Something. she's super over the moon but she's also like. OUR?? U GUYS HAVE THE SAME FRIENDS?? and is also a lot more surprised when like 9 people come over. like holy shit. THATS A LOT OF FRIENDS

and erm. yeah. goes as you'd expect. she freakout she thinks theyre on drugs then believes them then she cries then momo cries then shintaro cries and everyone hugs💖🙏 also there is NO WAY shintaro and momo never met their dad in the daze after dying in other routes, like kido meets rin in novel route!! they 100% did and shintaro would remember. thats also a whole thing he would talk to momo and eventually his mom about. i always get emotional because even if we dont know that much about their dad, in the novels shintaro mentions he'd feel so weird seeing him again and wonders what would he think of having such a loser as a son and it makes me fucking cry. just... imagining their daze reunion and their dad is so emotional bc last time he saw them they were just little kids. BWAA BWAAA

ANYWAYS COMING BACK TO UR THING YEAH SHE MOMS THE HELL OUT OF EVERYBODY. i agree i think she'd insist to have them over for dinner so often. and it'd be so funny because the mekatrio+mary are specifically SO socially awkward. the best is seto bc he's used to talking to grownups at his jobs but kido kano and mary are like. FROZEN.

and my point with kisaragi mama knowing abt everything is that she wouldn't just know that most of them are orphans but like. she'd know that all their parents died horrific deaths.

and ok for characters like hibiya and hiyori this is ALL headcanon territory but i hc hibiya's dad to be Fucking Awful and his mom is rly nice but married to An Awful Guy. and hiyori's parents are kinda too demanding/strict so she can't rly connect with them and both hibiya and hiyori grew up finding comfort in hibiya's mom. BUT WHEN IN THE CITY they stay with the kisaragis because of momo of course but also because kisaragi mama is like ERM. YEAH. IM SUPERVISING THESE LITTLE KIDS‼️‼️‼️ and she sorta adopts them the same way momo did. they're shintaro's little siblings by proxy augh theyre a fucking family *goes crazy*

there's also characters like haruka and takane, they arent orphans either but. erm. well. i dont wanna talk for 1 million years so ill leave it there

my point is kisaragi mama moms everyone💖🙏

#ask tag #headcanons

[llendrinall]

What if the golden trio + Draco magically get sucked into a universe where Riddle was killed before the potters were. And they grow up from babes to adulthood not remembering anything until they suddenly get their memories when each reach the age of 21 and ohh imagine how hard itd be on each's parents cuz they dont know whats wrong and all. Then bam Ron shows up engaged to a muggleborn he never spoke to in school and Harry and Draco are spotted on a date in a muggle zoo. The Malfoy's flip and so do the Potters.

It'd be a lovely story of healing, connecting and love and honesty I think they deserve it after the shit they went through.

The memories come to them in dreams. At first it’s just a strange, upsetting, dream that has a bit more consistency than dreams usually have and that lingers through the day while dreams fade away before you get out of bed. By the third night they have almost all the memories back, each dream slotting nicely with the previous one. Harry is understandably freaked out. He makes a quick trip to Godric’s Hollow to go hug his parents and then spends a lot of time looking at the one family photo they have in the living room, the one in which Harry and Dudley were seven. He stares at Petunia’s smile and wonders whatever happened to give him such horrible ideas about his aunt.

He and Ron are friends, living together as they went through the Auror training and now in their first year working as Aurors. Harry talks to Ron because he can’t shake that horrible feeling of dread; all the things he could lose or maybe all the things he has lost. That’s when they realize they have the same freaking memories, the same dreams, down to the nasty details like Ron leaving during the horcrux hunt or Harry being kind of a jerk about Ginny.

Ron, being Ron, is blessed with an eminently practical and down to earth sense of life. The dreams are strange and it would be very interesting to learn how come they got the same dream-memories, if something happened to their other selves and why are they suddenly remembering now. All those are very good and valid questions that someone should investigate. For now, Ron is going to find Hermione Granger and do whatever it takes to make her fall in love with him so he can marry her.

It turns out that Hermione has been getting the same dreams, the same memories, and when Harry and Ron – those two classmates she was friendly with but not super close to – come knocking on her door, she cries and she doesn’t know if it sadness for what they lost of joy to have them back. Ron once again shows his superior sense by grabbing her hand and saying that yes, this might be a super duper weird spell, and yes Hermione is right to suspect it and want to know why and where it came from, and yes, there may be some dark forces playing around; but none of that changes the fact that he loves her and even if the memories proved to be fake he will still love her because she has the courage and smarts to suspect the meaning of these memories and basically what Ron is trying to say is that he loves all iterations of Hermione. Sorry, but she is stuck with him.

They get married that same day, with Harry acting as a witness. Then they go tell their respective families. The Grangers take it surprisingly well and don’t even threaten Ron with dismemberment if he ever hurts Hermione. Instead, they ask him to do right by her. Ron, who might be going a bit mad, makes a vow of devotion and loyalty with his actual knee on the floor and the Grangers love it. They named their only daughter Hermione, of course they love it when an actual chivalric hero comes into their living room.

The Weasleys are a different thing. They know enough about magic to be suspicious of the sudden memories. Mrs Weasleys gives Hermione the stink eye because, to be honest, this sounds a lot like a love-potion. It’s only because Harry is there with the same memories and no wish to marry Hermione that Mrs Weasley doesn’t call the Wizarding Patrol immediately. Also, the twins and Ginny dislike Hermione. The twins slightly less so because they only had to suffer her as Prefect for a year, but for Ginny it was three long years of Hermione barring her from hexing and/or beating people. It was very frustrating and she blames Hermione for every pimple she got during that time. If Ginny had been allowed to hex Parkinson or Malfoy of freaking Finch-Fletchley every time they were their annoying selves, Ginny would have been much calmer and mellower and her skin would have reflected it.

So the Weasleys are not happy but there isn’t much they can do about it other than keep a close look on Hermione and wait for Ron to see reason.

It is a very busy weekend to say the least. On Monday Harry has vertigo because the week seems awfully empty (disarming a blood hex and capturing its creator, ppft, what is that for someone who remembers fighting Voldemort?). Harry would rather have his hours full so he won’t be overwhelmed by his thoughts. There is so much death in the memories! His parents, Sirius, Remus, Peter, even Regulus who is profoundly weird and very snobbish but James insists on inviting him to events and he keeps coming despite how uncomfortable he looks. They are all dead in Harry’s memories.

There is also Malfoy, who is even more of a jerk in the memories and who grew up to become an actual Death Eater like his father, someone who almost killed Dumbledore and who, when the time came, saved Harry’s life with a lie.

On Thursday the Auror office receives a call of dark activity in Minaford Park, which is where Draco Malfoy is living these days. Harry takes the assignment and makes quick work of the boggart and the ghoul that somehow were trapped under the stairs and were screaming at each other. As excuses go, it’s not too bad. Harry is certain that Draco could have done it himself, but it is messy enough that it seems believable that he would prefer someone else to fix it for him.

Draco offers Harry tea, which he accepts. There is a very odd tension in the air. Draco is down to his shirt sleeves and has shadows under his eyes and when he looks at Harry… It can’t be said that he looks at him funny. Draco was his usual snobbish self while he watched Harry getting rid of the creatures. But there is something in his eyes when Harry takes a seat and accepts the tea cup. Something almost like sorrow.

No, not sorrow.

Compassion.

“Look, Potter”, Draco says. “I am too old to start having prophetic dreams, but this affects you directly. You figure out if someone is playing with a timer-turner or what, here it goes.” And he tells Harry everything.

As one could expect, Minaford Park has a very beautiful garden. Draco and Harry spend hours after lunch walking through it. Ah, yes, Harry stayed for lunch. Draco insisted. He still had things to tell Harry and he was growing hungry.

They meet again on Saturday, ostensibly so Harry can tell Draco what he and Hermione had learned. Ron says he doesn’t give a damn where the memories came from. He only cares what he can do with them and so far he seems to be doing pretty well, having married Hermione and encouraged Bill to ask Fleur Delacour out. Hermione and Harry are a bit more worried, but Harry will admit the research effort goes 30-70% in Hermione’s favour.

Talking with Draco is good. He seems to share the same dread as Harry. Draco confesses that he is not happy with his conduct, or rather the conduct of the Draco that could be. He talks a lot about the fear and nausea at having the Dark Lord in his house, the smell of despair that took over the manor, the mad glint in his aunt Bellatrix’s eyes. Since Draco talks about his aunt, about seeing her mad and cruel and talking proudly about torturing the Longbottoms, Harry feels that he can talk about his own aunt Petunia and Draco will understand. Lily and Petunia don’t have the closest relationship, but to think that she could treat Harry like that…

The Sunday visit to the zoo isn’t a date. As soon as Hermione learns that Draco also has the memories she assigns work pairs and tasks. She sends Harry and Draco to check the reptiles in case they see something like Nagini in there. Both of them have the most memories of her. They should be able to recognize the snake.

Nagini is there and she is surprisingly cognizant for a snake which makes them suspect that she might be a horcrux. The discovery leaves them cold, a new kind of vertigo opening before them. They didn’t live through it, they are only memories, but the exhaustion of the war feels real and they don’t want to go through anything similar again.

Draco asks to go see the penguins and it might seem silly and contradictory, but watching them helps a lot to keep the chill from Nagini away. Neither can tell who initiated, but while in there they begin to hold hands. They go to see the butterflies next, which are in the next pavilion, and suddenly everything in the world looks much better. They don’t kiss when they part, but the way they look at each other is worth at least three kisses.

On Monday Harry receives a short message from Remus that simply says he has sequestered the Prophet’s copy but he doesn’t know how long he can keep Harry’s parents from seeing the news. Harry takes the morning off work and goes to Godric’s Hollow immediately so they can learn about Draco from him rather than the salacious gossip column.

James simply says, “MALFOY? You… MALFOY!?”.

He seems upset. Then he freezes and for the next ten minutes James says nothing. He doesn’t move. He is just there, in the kitchen, one hand in the air and the other holding a cup of tea that is growing cold.

“Harry, dear, I want you to come to dinner today.” Lily says. She has a worried frown but is otherwise unperturbed. “And tell us everything about those memories. Even the bad bits. This is important. It can be dangerous.”

“Yes! Dinner!” James screams, suddenly unfreezing. “Bring him to dinner. Tonight.”

“What?”

“No, you are right. It might be too formal, too soon. Quidditch, then. Does he like Quidditch? He must. I remember you complaining about him while you were in school.”

“He… likes Quidditch, yes.” Harry says hesitantly because even now he is not sure if his dad is talking about Draco.

“Perfect. We shall go see a Quidditch match, the three of us.”

“James.” Lily warns.

“Does anybody in this house know when the next Quidditch match is?” James cries over his wife’s warning that he is doing it again, just like with Sirius.

“Saturday.” Remus says.

“That’s too late! When is Sirius back?”

“Wednesday.” Answers Remus and despite his transformation exhaustion he nimbly steps away from Lily’s strike with the newspaper. Usually Remus would spend his transformation at home, but since Sirius had to go on a trip he came to James and Lily’s so he would have company, which led to the fortunate circumstance of being able to take the newspaper and delay the news.  

“Honestly, Remus.” Chides Lily.

“I’m not encouraging him! You can’t call answering his questions encouragement!”

“It is decided, then.” James announces from the chair. He has climbed a chair and is speaking from atop. “Friday, you bring young Malfoy home. We will play Quidditch and some board games and have dinner in the yard. Sirius shall bring Regulus so Malfoy is not the only Slytherin.”

“James, listen to me…” Lily tries with little faith that James would listen to anyone.

That same morning, at eleven, Lucius Malfoy receives a howler from James Potter composed of thirty-two seconds of mad laughter, which means that James must had listened to Lily at some point or most likely that she was able to take his wand.

It couldn’t be said that James Potter was happy to hear that his beloved son was dating a snobbish Slytherin prick, no, but as soon as he realized that Lucius Malfoy would be equally unenthused about it, it had awaken James’s unhinged tendency towards confrontation with the established power and forced adoption of families’ black sheep. He had done it to Sirius, he had done it to Remus, he had done it to Peter (even if it failed catastrophically) and he was doing it to Regulus now. He had even befriended Severus Snape. Oh! Snape! He should invite Snape too. That way they could make teams of four.  He would come if Lily asked him to.

And afterwards they explore those memories, and Lily looks worried and so does Snape. Regulus goes very quiet for a while but then he gives his opinion of what has happened and it’s the most words anyone has heard him speak but the multiverse theory makes a lot of sense.  

The Weasleys warm up to Hermione eventually. They can’t tell why, exactly, other that Ron is beaming these days. Also, every time she comes to the Burrow she brings a gift to Arthur. It is a very obvious ploy to make them like her but it works because she sees the gift through and answers all of Arthur’s questions no matter how long it takes. The twins took notes when she gave her physics lecture. It was most informative. They created two prank artefacts out of it.

They find the few horcruxes Voldemort managed to make. Peter, who had a falling out with the Potters years ago, resurfaces and tries to steal a horcrux and bring back the Dark Lord out of spite. According to Regulus some people are dedicated to bring their own destruction and you can’t do anything about it.  Barty Crouch Jr. also tries to bring Voldemort back, but by then Lucius Malfoy has been adopted by James even though he is a powerful adult man with his own family. It makes no sense. If anything, Lucius should be the one informally adopting people and grooming them under his wing to be his devoted friends and allies. But Lucius had become James’, just like Severus warned him it would happen, so he puts a stop to that Barty Crouch nonsense pretty quickly and to any other former Death Eaters with ideas. Lucius might not like the Potters but he likes the idea of Voldemort taking over his house even less, and whatever else his happening, it makes Draco happy, so.

What little of Voldemort remained alive, it is now dead.

The four of them, they have the shadows and regrets of two lives, the fear and pain of two wars, but the happiness afterwards… Oh, it is worth it, it is very, very worth it. It is the happiness of two lives, tenfold.  

#asks #harry potter #memories #au #Anonymous #verse: memories from another life

[botanistlester]

do you ever think about what you're doing and realize how much time we all spend writing about 2 people having sex whom we've never met and don't even know if they're actually together (oh who am i kidding ofc they are) but like we've all devoted so much of our lives to writing about what we want two guys to be doing??? and if we started writing stories about how two people we knew who hated each other in hs were having sex together it'd be weird... idk its 2 am and i'm just ranting k bye ily

honestly ive thought about this but i think it’s actually a really wonderful thing??? Like, think about it. These two nerds on the internet were able to bring together THOUSANDS of people who have the same interests and sense of humor. They brought together a plethora of people who are now able to meet their platonic soulmates because of them, and they’ve encouraged so many people to express their creativity with the internet. I know a lot of blogs who have started doing art or making edits/gifs or writing because they’re so filled with passion for these two guys that they want to shout it to the world! And it’s so wonderful because it becomes a new hobby, one that can grow and blossom into something so wonderful, maybe even something that can get them a job in the future! Plus, fanfiction in general is such a great way to bring a community together as well! The reason I started writing is because I wanted to make people happy with my work and to make them feel hopeful! A huge theme i try to convey in a lot of my fics is hope, because it’s something important to me. And what better way to spread a message like this than through a whole bunch of people who are a part of a fandom?! It would have been so much more difficult to have an impact through an actual novel, because not a lot of people really read large books like that anymore. I can’t tell you how many people i see messaging authors and saying that their works saved them, made them feel better, made them feel like they had a purpose in life, etc. This is so fucking wonderful because these stories affect a large audience, something i dont think paper novels often do. Not to mention, a lot of people i know are REALLY craving lgbt+ books and can only access a lot of it through fanfiction. this is such a wonderful thing! something that can make everyone who’s a part of this community feel like they belong! All in all, fanfiction and fanart, and FANDOMS in general are so wonderful because they allow people to share their creative juices with the world, receive feedback, and also meet friends who share the same interests! It’s such a wonderful thing :D

#phan #phandom #phanfic #phanfiction #danielhowel #phil lester #amazing phil #daniel howell #dan howell #Anonymous

[punkscowardschampions]

Ali & Carly

Ali: 😭 Ali: BITCH I'M SOBBING Ali: Why are you the purest of all time? Carly: dont cry baby Carly: its not that shit like i did try Ali: It isn't shit at all Ali: it's the best Ali: when can I come get it Carly: I'll bring it youre hurt Carly: anything else you need? Ali: s'all good, Lene is bringing bandages but honestly Ali: frozen peas helped loads, not even that bad now Ali: I can hop to you 🐰 Carly: cute as youd look Carly: i wont make you k Carly: should i not come over if she is? Ali: probably not Ali: i want you to but she would be awks if not rude n i don't wanna do that to you Ali: she's just stressy rn Carly: yea hmu when she goes Carly: ill bring you good shit for the pain Ali: you're my 😇 shortcake Ali: never over how cute the gift is either Ali: hidden talents Ali: imma have to think of something good to give you now, least I'll have time if I can convince Ma that I need to rest this shit Carly: w such a talented boo i had to step it up Carly: cant lose you Carly: you dont need to do anything for me tho youre the one hurting Carly: & the cute one Ali: you won't Ali: less I make a habit of rolling down the mountains, which I ain't planning on Ali: stop at a nice grassy hill, like Ali: you can kill me with kindness tho 😊 into it Carly: yea dont k Carly: but do bring me flowers if youre in that grass for a while Carly: wanna feel the love Ali: I so will Ali: not from the garage either Ali: proper romance Carly: aw Carly: youre the best Carly: never had flowers before Ali: that's an outrage Ali: imma fix that so fast Carly: youre gonna make me sob Ali: not the goal just 'cos you got me first Carly: cuz i love you bitch Carly: it scared me when you hit the ground Ali: i love you too bitch Ali: i'm soz, swear i'm usually more capable and less dramatic Carly: my bad for having parents that make us run to the mountains Ali: it's chill Ali: adventures are the best Ali: mad we didn't find a cave to live in but there's always next time Carly: make it homey & cute aw Carly: gonna need it if your gf or fam are mad at me Ali: cavegirl chic Ali: only come down for the good times Ali: nah, my fam just laughed Ali: tah for the sympathy 🖕 twats 😂 Carly: my hair looks better uncombed like i can make that work Carly: when you gonna b party ready? Carly: my fam going away Ali: Again? Ali: I'm always ready to party Carly: i kno Carly: we have a few days to make it good Carly: ma needs to hit the salon before she can go like Ali: Naturally, gotta start your pre-tan now amirite Linda Ali: but so up for this Ali: this town needs a good party Ali: and so do we Carly: unnaturally blonde too Carly: o ma Carly: yea itll be fun Ali: we do have more fun 💅💄👗 Ali: as dubo gon' know Carly: ha Carly: me first tho Ali: obviously Ali: party planning party Carly: you bringing your gf this time? Ali: nah Ali: her idea of planning ahead is getting in double the cases, like valid but what are we wearing Carly: bored of my clothes Carly: we gotta shop Ali: 🙌 ugh Ali: marry me again Carly: k set the date Ali: obvs gotta have a 3 in it Ali: for the 🍀 Carly: & 🔮 Ali: exactly Ali: baby gets it Carly: you get me Ali: i hope so Ali: 'cos you're cool and fun and sweet Ali: i like you Carly: aw Carly: i love you 👼 Carly: cutest Ali: 🤭 Carly: gotta make you blush for each ⚘ Carly: thats my plan Ali: Can count that as 2 but Imma start making it harder from now on Carly: yea? Ali: Can't be giving 'em away Ali: plus intrigued to see what you come up with Carly: but youre so pretty when you go pink Carly: trying to change my fave colour Ali: damn, you're good 😜 Ali: what is your favourite colour Carly: 💙 Ali: Good choice Ali: the sky, the ocean, can't go wrong Carly: liked it more since i met you Carly: the eyes be like Ali: girl, you killing me Carly: sorry Ali: you ain't and i ain't Carly: facts Carly: wish you were here its boring Ali: same Ali: but Lene will be here soon, don't think I can move that fast Ali: also feel more guilty even though I ain't actually doing anything wrong Carly: i kno Carly: ill go see if ronans still in a mood Carly: if she gets too much you can say she has to come be chivalrous for me cuz hes kicking off Carly: probs will no lie Ali: don't let him be a dick Ali: more than his usual and expected, like Carly: bored of his tantrums hes like a kid Ali: yeah Ali: gotta learn he's not that much of a ride Carly: like sorry you want my wife more than me not my bad Carly: & same boy Carly: shes the ride here Ali: nah, just pissy you banged his cousin, sure Ali: you hush 😘 Carly: but i banged bartley cuz ronan didnt pay me no attention Carly: your own fault lad Ali: let him know Ali: if it weren't me it'd be some other girl, yeah? so he needs to get over it if that's how he wanna play or start apologising now, like Carly: yea Carly: ill tell him Carly: dont let your girl be a dick either tho Ali: I don't Ali: esp. not about my baby Carly: waiting for her to slide in my dms to warn me off Carly: gonna smack me w that gay scale Ali: 😂 Ali: least you can clap back like Ali: bitch i'm a 1 Carly: yea Carly: & not my bad the boo is magic Carly: cant resist Ali: exactly Ali: only human Carly: true Carly: any1 who dont like you is proper weird Ali: awh baby Ali: can i put that on my tinder Carly: gotta Carly: but you kno where to bring the dick pics Ali: DCI Carly Carly: only way im getting letters round my name Ali: I'd make you queen Ali: but lizzie ain't budging and fuck the royals yeah Carly: aw babe Carly: im blushing if you keeping score Carly: gonna be like i own this place after our party Ali: hell yeah Ali: 👑 Ali: bow down bitches Carly: gonna rule w me yea Ali: you sure you don't want prince ronan by your side? Carly: im sure Ali: then of course Ali: lemme fetch my crown Carly: id make you one but youve seen my lack of talents Carly: could maybe do ❀ Ali: ain't seen nothing but, thank you Ali: always a look Carly: you wanna see something k Carly: ill remember you said that Ali: what you planning Carly: nothing w your gf on her way Carly: but you kno Ali: shame Ali: wife ain't meant to be the fun one 😉 Carly: but when you marry me tho Carly: nother time baby Ali: i know, i wifey'd too well Ali: so 🍀 Carly: me too Ali: Oh she's here Ali: chatting up my Ma in the kitchen Carly: fun Ali: Truly Ali: She'd have booted Ronan so far down the road if he'd tried Carly: ha Carly: he doesnt do older no offense to your hot ma Ali: 😂 Ali: can't be doing much younger now, creeper Carly: thatll be why hes so moody Ali: gutted, babe Carly: but no need for you to be Carly: go get your girl Ali: heaven forfend i get up Ali: gotta play invalid Carly: aw babe Carly: take the perks & make it good tho Ali: yeah Carly: be fun Ali: always Carly: ill be here trying to make mine Ali: can take my new good luck charm as long as you keep it safe Carly: nah its yours Carly: gonna keep it safer than that for my baby Ali: 💚 Ali: just keep yourself safe then yeah Carly: aw Carly: yea k Carly: for you boo

[punkscowardschampions]

Ali & Carly

Ali: Worth leaving your park for? Carly: fun Carly: he likes you more but its k cuz so do i Ali: nah Ali: he was so 😍 for the whole sitch I thought he might genuinely explode on sight Ali: it was fun tho, you were so good Carly: that would've been disappointing Carly: he was better than i thought hed be Carly: lads that cocky dont usually come through Carly: youre always good Ali: yeah, i'll give him that Ali: obviously overhyped himself but all lads do Ali: worth it to see my baby work it Ali: and i hope not 😉 Ali: though u can tell my Ma that, get me off the hook, like Carly: not just lads me too Carly: never seen you play someone like that before tho Carly: we gonna try this on caleb next or Carly: she scares me more than your ex but still would Carly: for you my baby Ali: how can you, you're perfect Ali: i know, crossing lads but not each other back then, babe Ali: not mad, not exactly my finest hour but wouldn't hate having met you sooner Ali: idk if it'd work on him Ali: he's not as dumb as Drew, bless him 😘 Ali: felt weird being at his house, woulda died if any of them had come back, like 😂 Ali: never mind my Ma, have you ever seen his? Carly: you're too sweet Carly: i kno cuz you wanna treat him nice like you do me Carly: not how you did drew hot as that was tho Carly: nah thats the first time ive been there & mas w sons give me space like Carly: sorry we should have brought him back to here my bad Ali: blah shut up 😏 Ali: obvs I wanna ride him too but idk Ali: gives off #loyal vibes to me so probs not a goer Ali: Well you know, had to show you what a real girl on girl on boy threesome was all about, boo Ali: nah, it added to the experience Ali: whatever it was, it wasn't boring Carly: i kno that he gives off 😍 for you Carly: & you like him Carly: catch you in his room collecting hair or w ever to put a spell on the boy Carly: when you could just do it the easy way Carly: aw never boring when im w you girl Carly: youve shown me a lot Ali: There's definitely attraction but I don't really know him Ali: Only see some people at parties, he's one of 'em Ali: like you said, we didn't properly SEE each other 'til now, did we? same kinda vibe Ali: my rep proceeds me 💀 Ali: where's the fun in easy? Ali: besides, I'm with you, and you're so fucking cute Ali: who else I need Carly: k but if you want him to see you you've gotta get out there Carly: if you can turn me you can make him forget your rep Carly: got the magic baby you kno Carly: you're cuter Carly: making me blush Ali: you're right Ali: work on being MORE extra Ali: the world ain't ready 😉 Carly: me either Carly: you're also so hot Carly: unfair Carly: if you get more Ali: baby Ali: making me miss you already Ali: that's what's unfair Carly: can i be at yours later tho Carly: my parents are fighting about me & think idk Carly: bitch its a caravan Ali: That's fun Ali: about parenting styles or? Ali: Of course you can Ali: I share a room with Ro though remember, so, best behaviour Carly: ha Carly: theyve got no flair Carly: about to throw this washing up bowl at my ma as my contribution to the convo Carly: shit i forgot Carly: maybe i shouldnt come over then Ali: trying to think of a witty one-liner for when you do Ali: all i've got is 'this convo is as dull as dishwater' lemme workshop it, hold fire boo Ali: nah, please come Ali: lmao, flashbacks to Drew there but forreal Ali: we can sleep on the sofa if needs Carly: lads are so funny Carly: i thought he was gonna cry w he thought we'd changed our minds Carly: good stash tho Carly: only reason my ma still running her mouth about me Carly: well zen Ali: another night crywanking Ali: gutting Ali: yeah, and you see all that fancy shit in his room, clearly on his big badman hype Carly: cant ever bring him here Carly: never hear the end Ali: gonna have trouble keeping him away now, babe Ali: 💦 Carly: only if youre here Carly: you speak the local lingo yea? Ali: Gabh mo leithscéal? Ali: 😏 Carly: wtf Carly: you could've just said yea babe Ali: could've but i'm a showoff Carly: cant act like i dont love it now Ali: can but it'd be a blatant lie Ali: right tongue workout, Gaelic, like Carly: thatll be why you bothered & i never Carly: very gay of you Ali: odds already stacked against me being 50% scum Ali: had to do what i could, babe Carly: help me out then Carly: my da's trying to start a fight w ronan's da who dont even speak english Carly: funny or fucked that he thinks thats where i go Carly: guaranteed his da is calling me a slag while my dad does the same Carly: ha Ali: 😒 Ali: fight for your honour or gtfo Ali: So stupid Ali: want me to rock up translator cum where you've been wasting your time? Carly: i told em all ive been too busy having 3ways w you & the golden god but they aren't having it Carly: gonna have to give you all a show, am i lads that aint what you want da but its what ill do k Carly: walking away before they start kissing themselves Carly: the tension Ali: Oh, middle-aged straight men Ali: never far away from a crisis or homoerotic awakening Ali: Join the club Carly: grab another beer lads itll be alright Carly: im not knocked up or running off with your lad Carly: do wanna get out of here tho Ali: Oh he is not potential baby daddy material at all Ali: Please Ali: come over or you wanna go somewhere else Ali: think my Da is firing up the BBQ, another staple of manliness Ali: sure we can keep him from brawling and strictly on the burgers tho Carly: who is Carly: get me on the ferry before you get me down the aisle Carly: k im walking Carly: keep me company babe Ali: valid Ali: benefits of being a gay is no awkward hush hush trips to England Ali: of course Carly: if only my parents believed i like you Carly: get back to slagging me off for other shit Carly: irish at me again. i liked it Ali: Bit offended, like, have you seen me guys? I'm a sensation Carly: i dont think they know who you are sorry Ali: Tá tuillte agat ar fud an domhain, Carly Walsh Ali: at least I can dramatically ask 'em then and really fucking mean my shock horror Carly: if you don't live on site you don't exist Carly: do i need to be offended at what you're saying about me in that gay tongue twister Ali: everyone got their own bubble Ali: i found out the world extends beyond the end of my street tho but you do you lads, it is easier that way Ali: tho not safer, ask ginge 😈 Ali: i hope not Ali: was nice, promise Carly: i wanna see more of it than this Carly: like you said wheres the fun in easy Carly: shit yea shes your ronan like Carly: she gonna show herself at the bbq Carly: i believe you, you don't kno how to be anything else to me even if you should Ali: You will Ali: Make sure of it Ali: I've shown you the stars, gonna show you the wonders on this world too, scout's honour Ali: omg, so is Ali: although she doesn't occasionally come by when she's horny Ali: so we're safe Ali: she'd never trust me serving her a bevvy, like 🧙‍♀️ #witchesbrew Ali: why should I? don't be telling me what to do woman 😜 Carly: maybe she should Carly: she might be less sad and mad once she's had a ride w you Carly: you gonna play like you don't like it now Carly: just in the bedroom k hear you Ali: I'll put it out there Ali: get ready to cover my bruises this time Ali: 😏 Ali: time and a place, baby Carly: if you're showing her what real magic is she can't be mad Carly: but if she is she can go through me i got you girl Carly: wont beat me a second time like Ali: my lil million dollar baby Ali: into it Carly: your sister would be too Carly: not in the same way but would get her on side Ali: she's so on side Ali: now she knows you ain't tryna be my bosom bud like that Carly: she still dont vibe w me tho Carly: i kno it wasnt just that Ali: she's just shy, don't worry Ali: no one out here you need to impress but me and i already am Carly: what about your ma and da Carly: i kno they arent shy Carly: how do you want me to play that Ali: just be you you don't gotta do anything more or less baby Carly: im scared Ali: you don't have to be, I swear, Ma's not as bad as she 👀 and my Da's a big softie Ali: you can just come as my friend, they aren't gonna pry Carly: k Carly: i trust you Carly: itll be fun yea Ali: s2g Ali: you can meet Tommo, you'll like him Ali: and your fave will be dying for your attention, obvs Carly: mystery boy Carly: is he hot like your other brothers Ali: i'm not gonna confirm or deny 'cos bit weird Ali: also potentially rude if I nah it 'cos I reckon he ain't your type Ali: I cannot promise hot brothers making an appearance but you might get 🍀 Carly: hot sister then Carly: I dont mean my fangirl but the older one Ali: package deal with the freckly one Ali: not rock, weirddd Ali: but see, so ready with the compliments they're gonna 💚 u Carly: he's hot too Carly: & you kno i think the littlest is such a cutie Carly: but i dont wanna compliment anyone but you Ali: I'm not gonna complain about that Carly: better not cuz im almost at yours Carly: its too hot to turn around & walk back Ali: yay! Ali: lemme come get you Ali: i wanna kiss you before we have to be social Carly: i want you to kiss me whenever you feel like it Ali: might just take you up on that Carly: do cuz it means i can too Ali: deal 💚