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davekat-sucks · 2 days

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homestuck's fanbase is really making me feel like giving up on the story as a whole... Jesus, I might just call it quits soon. Listening to idiots try to defend how shit Homestuck's story became is too exhausting. It reminds me of when I was listening to lectures of, people who hardly counted as, writers go off about how important it is to prioritize representation over all else. They never realized if you do a terrible job with writing a story, you do a terrible job of representing women, different racial groups, gay men, ext. They don't want to write female characters like they're people who make mistakes and grow. Those authors wanted women to always be perfect and always in the right and her biggest obstacle is that men don't believe in her. You can see that in Star Wars with Rei or Captain Marvel as an example of the mindset I'm talking about.

I liked homestuck because so many of the female characters had challenges and flaws. Aradia, Terezi, Rose... They had amazing stories and their flaws made them interesting.

Homestuck could have been a story about different people who have completely different mindsets coming together for a common goal. Homestuck is just... soap opera drama and shitty teen romance at the end of the story where the characters just wait for the story to finish and most of the audience left. In the epilogue, it feels like all of the characters gave up. I suppose Kanaya did put in effort to find Rose and make sure she is safe, I'll give the story credit there. Dirk wants something too. Dirk's goal is just to close the loop and create the first universe in the first place but all you ever hear people talking about is how his motivations have something to do with the shitty meta fiction gimmick the story has going on. "Gotta keep the story going or else the characters fade out of memory" That is such bullshit concept. Sounds like a justification for why there are so many Star Wars shows now. Sounds like milking an IP. Quantity of quality kind of excuse.

And, for the record, my beef isn't with how the fandom represents it's own headcanons or interpretations of the characters, my beef is with how people talk about the canon. Fandom and canon should be two different things. But people act like the fandom should influence canon. I thought the point of both of the cherubs were to show that is a bad idea. Fanon being in canon feels like it derails the story, even the homosuck part that Caliborn came up with.

I'm getting tired of trying to even find a space in this fandom. It's occupying too much of my freetime now. I have so much nostalgia for homestuck but now it feels like trying to get back on the swings of a playground, too old for this shit. Fuck, I adulted too hard and I outgrew fandom I guess. Shit sucks.

Ah well, at least they fans are having fun. But how much fun can you really have when Rose screwed over Kanaya in two timelines? Kanaya felt like a better character in the epilouge cause she's given a challenge to face that is unique to her and her relationship with her wife. Rose's dad brainwashed(?) her to leave her wife, wow, Kanaya that's some shit. Just sucks that she is getting cucked AGAIN. Is it a universal constant that Kanaya is just going to keep falling for women who don't respect her? Maybe she should have stuck with Vriska. All of this Kanaya Rose drama is a bad sign of what's to come. I think it's disrespectful to the fans that are still sticking around. I'm not really included in this bunch. My horse tapped out of the race years ago. People who are still holding out for hope this story is going somewhere are either the most optimistic people out there or the most beaten down.

It's no wonder so many people who worked on homestuck abandoned ship. Toby looks like he's having a good career and Hussie looks like he's afraid of what he created. Maybe there is poetic justice to be gleaned from all of this.

It had lot of creative ideas and talent. But through it, there are cracks and messes that can't be ignored. Even now, the same kind of messes appear again in present times and I think people are scared to talk about it in fear that the thing they love was not as great as they though it was. We really are suffering from Stockholm Syndrome. Even when moments in the series and narrative itself that tells the audience that we were stupid to even care, we stayed because we loved it for what it was back then before the meta shit kicked in. The whole revival of the series so it won't fade away and being comparable to Star Wars is a good way to describe it. The team not taking risks to actually go outside of the Homestuck cast, tell a new story, or even trying to focus on the base webcomic alone that made it popular in the first place. They can't even put more focus on Hiveswap just yet because they know people know Homestuck first before Hiveswap, despite said game could make a better introduction or entryway for people to get interested in the webcomic. I'm not sure what is going on through Hussie or James Roach's mind for all this.

#homestuck #homestuck fandom

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oh-meow-swirls · 17 days

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how does the raft not capsize.

#puppy rambles #yo-kai watch #yw3 #i mean komasan's not there in canon 3 so it's slightly better but not by a lot #i feel like someone should at least be falling off how is the raft also big enough to hold them all-#whisper floats so he doesn't add weight or any space really but like #it still needs to both hold the weight of three teenagers and two yo-kai #AND have the room for them all to fit #the rafting challenge in bada-bing tower is probably worse cuz it has to fit two additional yo-kai #i think komasan not being that important in the mainline games is very lame. he's pretty important in the anime so it's kinda weird #he is at least somewhat important in 3 since he's there for the yopple tour and everything in bada-bing tower #whereas in 1 he has the auto-befriend yo-kai curse (only being important in their debut chapter)#and in 2 he literally only shows up during the jibakoma quest in psychic specters #(excluding being an npc during the beginning of the jibanyan's secret quest alongside a bunch of other yo-kai)#idk what's weirder the fact they made him so important in the anime despite that or the fact they never made him important in the games #i personally go with the nyanderful days continuity that he also moves in with katie cuz that makes sense to me #i've literally never written anything where nate's the one who gets the watch in 1 so idk what i'd do there-#(funny how i've never written anything that's in the same timeline as canon-)#i want to at least write something at somepoint where nate and katie both get watches cuz i like that idea #i mean i have a dumb au idea where nate and katie independently get watches at the start of 1 at around the same time #and take an extended period of time to realize #mostly just haven't actualized that cuz 1) i already have the rewrite and 2) i don't have enough ideas #basically just have the basic concept-#these tags got derailed quick. and also make me really wanna work on the rewrite more-#i have so many ideas but i'm just not motivated to write any of them #and also most of them are for 3 and i haven't finished rewriting 2 yet 😔#‚‚‚ anyways-

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northern-passage · 2 years

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how would we feel about an update that doesn’t have all of the paths available immediately? as in you could see the choice but it wouldn’t be selectable and would be marked as a wip?

#im not sure if i'm actually going to do this but im close to finishing a particular variation but i then still have like...#2 more choices #and one of them i dont know if im strong enough to write after working so long on the first one #it's very similar to the one im working on now but slightly to the left which is why i think it will be really exhausting #for me to write it atm #most likely would only be this one choice and tbh. it's not that special LOL #it's just choosing to be aggressive or defensive initially. i'm almost finished w aggressive #but i think im going to need a long break before doing the defensive one #but im so close to the end i dont want to take a break...#i know i did this back when i did the routes in ch1 since i did them one at a time #but i dont particularly like to do this but also im dying #also to be clear i still have 2 whole paths to do as well as the 2 other main choices in this one #so it's not like im close to updating necessarily #but im just wondering what the general consensus is #of having unfinished paths in an update?#and i also think maybe getting some of it out publicly will help motivation-wise so i can get some feedback #i even debated cutting this choice bc it's not that drastic of a difference outcome wise #it's mainly just how you want to approach it in character #but i dont want to cut it bc then i dont think there would be enough options #and i don't want to force people to go in aggressively if it's not their style anyways

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pekoeboo · 8 months

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hhh i've had like. no drive to work on any art or writing projects. ;n; my heart is still so invested in the stories and characters I've created, but the motivation to take those feelings and put it into some form of content is next to nil. i don't know why it's been like that but it's kinda sad :c

don't get me wrong - i'm happy with most of the things i've created lately, but it's also been this strange game of doubt and comparison going on in my head when it comes to actually sharing what I make. there are a lot of pieces of art and writing that i just haven't posted because i feel like it's not in a place where it's good enough for anyone other than myself. the idea of editing and actually finishing some projects so that i can make sense of them online is overwhelming even tho i would love to just... get some of those ideas out for anyone who might be interested in hearing about them, you know?

anyway. probably just need to let myself take some kind of break?? idk what that would really entail at this point tho. it's just been a weird mental state that I need to work out i guess.

#so like. not quite a hiatus but some Secret Other Thing #i'm hoping the motivation to actually finish projects and share them will come back to me #but right now i think i need to either just focus on drawing or writing stuff without any intention of sharing it #or maybe i shouldn't draw/write at all for a while instead #but i'd still love to talk about the characters and stories with y'all??#unfortunately that really only seems to work best within like personal messages between friends or whatever #i've tried posting random content about characters on here but it feels weird without any art to go along with it #(like when i wrote that post about khalan's backstory that one time)#so i just dont talk about them at all outside of that because i can't tell if ppl would actually want to hear about them #and even if ppl do i have no idea where to start without any prompts or specific questions to build off of kdjfg #anyway #i'm rambling now oops #dont know what the point of this post is but i'll probably delete it eventually #my ramblings #text post

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keeps-ache · 2 months

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everyday there's somethin goin on. like the day. or somethin like that

#just me hi #[squinting] there's always something going on #but also ?? what's been happening lol ?? i am only like 34% sure things happened recently #not like i forgot things (i did but-) it feels like nothin is happening. but also there's always Something hbsh #//anyway. my software is being funky again lol :)#kind of wanna do stuff but blaaahahahah #blaaaaaaaah #no motivation really. so sads #GASP but wait i wanted to work on Hid's natural form cuz i want it to be a lil less human-looking #trying to figure how i'll do that though. hmm :^#cuz see he may have wings but he didn't originally. this is due to Fate stuff but that means he won't have bird legs or summin lol #/MAN and i should digitize Fate asap when my puter gets back lol #i think i've mentioned her like twice but Ough. i gotta draw her ehehegh :33 #/but yea i dunno what angle i wanna try for hid lol !!#something........ sooooomething.......#/cannot WAIT til i've finished the little world stuff i was writing !! boop has all my files tho so until then...#condensing information is my passion hdvhs #//speaking of i gotta make new refs for everyone HH #i just made those new ones last year i think and i Do still like them but aoh. they're inaccurate now hfvsh #like oath's hair changed as did kira's and also i'm redesigning hid So :^ :>>#//man. anywhoogh #i'm gonna skedaddle rn n see if i can get somethin done lol :3 #toodles man !! [skitters away]

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bluebellhairpin · 7 months

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Hi sweet girl! It’s dissertation nonnie here (who is exceptionally shy so just messaged you back in your ask box) I saw your post and it warmed my heart! As someone who finds solace in getting lost in stories I find it so beautiful how you dedicate your writing something that takes so much emotional effort to the happiness of others, your fic was an escape for me and I only hope you find as much happiness writing it as I have reading it❤️ much love from your anxious nonnie :)

stop are you trying to make me cry or do you just REALLY want the next part of the fic (honestly if you were trying for both, you'd be getting BOTH) no one has said anything like this about any of my fics before I swear I might as well give you my whole life with how deep my feelings about what you said are.

#i'm like over here typing up the next part as i type this #and i'm so moved by what you said #shy anon or not you words mean so much to me - at this time more than you'd probably know #it is truly a joy for me to write and it is a story i intend to see it its end - no matter how long that takes #but when someone like you comes along and reminds me there ARE other people who care about it like i do #that really is my best motivator to get it finished #I KNOW how their story ends but you don't #so i have to finish telling it #I LOVE YOU SO MUCH #nemo answers #anon #the girl who knew the end

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causticsunshine · 1 year

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hellooo for anyone interested in reading this year's momrry—if you're able to vote via twitter, please let me know if you have a chapter formatting preference here!

seeing as how i've paced things, i'll be able to break the fic up either way easily! it just depends on whether you guys would like fewer chapters that are quite long, or a few more chapters that are a little bit shorter that the former (but honestly not by much lol).

any feedback is greatly appreciated <3

#also if you cannot vote but would like to feel free to send me message anon or otherwise!#but anyway #resolved sigh back at it again being a wip queen #there'll be a note in the fic's AN touching on this but once the fic gets added onto/finished i'll remove it bc it won't be relevant #i plan to continue writing w/o breaks until it's finished bc i'm really liking it + am still really motivated to power through #but alas it's not going to be completely done by tuesday when it's still scheduled to go live so stay tuned #because i very much like it and am excited to finish it and see what people think of it <3 #(hoping it'll also help me with the huge writer's block i've had with LGOAP as a big part of why that one is still unfinished is #due to the transition from part one to part two just never turning out well enough for me? so i'm really hoping #that by writing more momrry something will finally come to me and that one will be finished at long last too 🤞)

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mr-mustache-penis · 1 year

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i really don't know why i bother writing fic anymore :/

#i hate sounding like such a whiney insecure asshole but literally what am i doing wrong?#i feel like no one cares about my writing and the people that DO care only tell me in direct messages #i don't get the comments and kudos like i feel like i should #my writing is not bad! i know it's not bad! why does lack of engagement make me feel like i'm a shit writer?#i even commissioned art and that did nothing :/#i feel bad for even complaining when the literal writer's strike is happening like that's about to determine my future as a screenwriter #i knew i should have waited to just release it as a oneshot but now I'm stuck doing chapters #i have no motivation to finish it when there's only a couple scenes left #i really wish i could care less about it but writing is what i want to do! how can i make movies with scripts that i write #when i can't even hold attention with fanfic!#maybe i should just give up

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noxtivagus · 1 year

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the whole world of ffxiv is very dear to me

#🌙.rambles #[ ffxiv. ]#i'm catching up on some quests. particularly the role quests for crafters rn n #THE WRITING IS SO GOOD #i love how the side stories n all these side characters. have. actual character to them #i remember a few months back when i finally finished the. hmmm. i can't rmb but it was the one with the harp. or the bard idk #I CANT REMEMBER BUT YK THE QUEST WHERE THE SONG FROM. ONE OF THE OLD FINAN FANTASIES #THE LUTE! THE LUTE YK FROM. AAAA WAS IT FFIV OR FFIII OR SMTH ELSE I CAN'T REMEMBER 😭#that said though i rmb something abt that like.. oh my god shadowbringers n.#HOPE! hope is one of my favorite themes ever n ffxiv always does so well w it for me #n then. stuff like. guilt. regret. past present n future.... ffxiv touches on it all is such a personal way.#then again. maybe i also really like the feeling of playing the protagonist or 'hero' through a video game #helping people. making memories through this fantasy world. having profound achievements n being productive #i've said this so much but it's bcs i rlly mean it; ffxiv as an mmorpg really changed my life #i'm. really happy. for the past year my motivation n energy has been really inconsistent n all but #recently.. i've managed to be kinder to myself?#idk oh man i remember last year i wasn't rlly too conscious of time in a. kind of obsessive way like i am now but not really hmmm #wait i'm just reflecting rn UWAH THAT SAID THOUGH #i'll just do what i can! i know i'll be able to do what i want in time anyways #that's just the kind of person i am. i'll work hard. i'll succeed in every aspect i want to.#it's certainly not easy n failure n disappointment will be inevitable but i know i'll make it through it all n do my best. fly. bloom.#being able to rest n take it slow w like ffxiv or wtvr's rlly helped #my social battery is nonexistent still but i always feel safe at least when i'm certain with myself #but i'll always challenge myself to do better. once more i'm excited for the new year #i'm rambling hdkgjskg but indulging in stuff i love like ffxiv rlly just!!!! makes me remember myself!!!!#this is who i am!!!!!!!!!!!! next year i'm gna do a lot better let's fucking go #THE OST OF THE CRYSTARIUM MEANS SO MUCH TO ME. SO MUCH MEMORIES. I MISS SHADOWBRINGERS :<<#hehe i'd really love to live in ffxiv. or to create my own world like it. a dream come true.. but i'll just do my best in this world.#i love the amaros so much :c 'still good in this world'.. yeah. the past few years have taught me that.#i. want to be like my wol honestly. but yk i do know deep down that it's enough to just be myself. that's what i love anyways.

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madeimpact · 1 year

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Kinda tempted to drop all my threads and start over

#seeing all the festive dash icons and stuff makes me wanna be here more #but ughhh......i've only really had the mental energy for discord rp #i think if i start some fresh plots here and force myself to let go of old ones i'll feel a little more motivated #new year new me and all that #i might...also add the Sortas(tm) once i finish kh3 bc hoo that brainrot #i've been writing roxas on discord and he's fun #but i can't really do what i'm doing with sora being at my point in gameplay #bc where i'm at in game rn roxas is...in sora's heart LMAO #so i'll probably just wait until after i finish the series to write roxas (and maybe ven)#but yeah i think i'm gonna just drop everything #except for like one or two starters i haven't answered #i'll let you know if i'm keeping smth but otherwise consider it dropped #unless you wanna keep a thread in which case dm me!#❛ ooc: shut up neg.

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foxgloveinspace · 7 months

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i started working on my Dinotopia fic again last night, started over bassically, cause I hated everything about what I had already written (which was only like 250 words maybe? i think, so not the end of the world really), but my dad just randomly decided to watch it this evening... huh.

#just... random really.#very much so #dinotopia fic opening scene is really good too #how old do you guys see Karl and David as?? cause I know they are probably meant to be like teens? but I think of them as 22 and 23 actuall #and I kinda always have tbh.#anyway........#I'm trying not to talk a whole lot about the fic actually. cause I am trying the whole 'do not talk about projects until they are done'#idea cause I think it'll help me more #more motivation cause then I don't get the small serotonin boost that doesn't actually help me write I just like getting it. So now I #have the motivation of 'when you finish this people can read it' and also the motivation of not letting myself talk about what is happening #I can only talk about chapters after I have posted them AFTER I finish writing the fic lmao #cause I'll be honest I was happiest in those seven weeks I had pre written chapters of my Dune fic lmao

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thetaoofbetty · 10 months

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What's a dumb toxic trait of yours?

okay first i'm not gonna really rat myself out like that so you're gonna have to accept whatever i say it is alright?

but truly, there are hundreds of asks in my drafts i answered and forgot to post and/or it was already set to draft so i didn't post it without finishing on accident and now it's like purgatory in there.

so, uh, you know...sorry if i forgot to answer an ask. it wasn't personal, it's because i'm an idiot.

#besos!#anonymous #like not to be dramatic but there's over 700 in my inbox #and almost 400 in my drafts #like #that's just asking a lot of someone who currently can't even figure out a fic plot #and also refuses to sit upright while typing this #made a playlist for the fic tho #so i'm like halfway done already #ideally i will find the motivation to finish this idea and then i really want to write another pairing because it's haunting me #we'll see tho #i can't even answer asks so i don't even know what people expect from me fr #have decided it's not toxic bc i felt a lot of pressure to answer them all for a long time tbh #and that was...a lot #so now we're all just gonna never know what my dumb toxic trait is

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aberooski · 11 months

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Now that I've started the 4th chapter of the Mario crossover.... getting really fucking tempted to say fuck it and start posting it already aksksksk

#I haven't done the like proper fanfiction post as u write shit in so long I kinda really miss it #like I've almlst been trained to wait until I'm finished doing events and stuff where we had to finish and then wait for a specific day #to be able tk start posting and we had rules about how often we had to post and time limits and parameters and shit #I really loved doing those it was really fun but I want to unlearn that behavior #I miss doing fics just for me and posting them every so often when I finish and having longevity and people actively excited and waiting #for lord knows when the next chapter would go up and it was fun and exciting you know?#I also think if I started doing that again it would motivate me to work because I would know there was at least 1 person waiting for me #maybe then I wouldn't burn out so hard every time I wrote something and I'd actually get more of my ideas done #I dunno what's the consensus?#abby's fanfic writer power hour #abby's just rambling don't mind her #your princeton is in another castle

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mattodore · 11 months

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new song just dropped for matthias's playlist

#river dipping #playlist #matthias core #a burning house to live in #echthroi #questionnaire lb #😂🔫🔫🔫#listening to my discover weekly while working on matthias's questionnaire and this started playing.... i felt Violent #hello hello hello............ YES i'm still writing in my free time and YES i feel insane over how long this is taking me to get done #but at least it's the weekend now so i have proper free time to just write without having other things get in the way #if i keep writing at the pace i'm currently writing at then i think i'll at least finish matthias's by tomorrow...#well so long as i don't let myself get distracted like i did yesterday when i watched jerma stream for five hours...... jkdfhdnkfnhkj #ummmm but matthias's questionnaire is currently over 3k long (just the answers... the questions themselves are also like 2k lmao)#i feel like i should be further along in these questionnaires but ig having to actually sit there and think out the motives and reasons #behind each answer has taken the most time... like i just have to sit with each question for awhile #and in theo's case there's so much i could extrapolate on but have to stop myself from bc i never want to explicitly go into certain #aspects of his backstory but if you see it and you understand it then..... well then you get it.#so when i'm answering some of his questions i've had to kind of toe this line of saying things without really saying them explicitly #i think i've learned a lot abt storytelling from succession in that regard jkfdkhjnghk YES the succ posting will never stop what can i say #but i've been at this so long now that i'm giving myself a few hours of a break.... meaning it's time to catch up 😌☝️#checking my activity feed first then it's onto legacies i'm attached to then my beloved mutuals #i'm fr setting a timer i'm only giving myself two hours on tumblr that's IT then it's back to google docs!!!

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malusokay · 7 months

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becoming a better student ₊˚⊹♡

Prepare for your classes ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

Wake up on time. We don't want to be stressed first thing in the morning, right?

Eat breakfast. So you will be able to better focus in class.

Assigned reading and homework. Make sure you are prepared for your classes!! :)

Review your notes. Going through some of your flashcards before class is really helpful.

Check your bag and charge your devices. Ensure you have everything you need: Books, homework, chargers, pens, water...

In Class ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

Listen and pay attention. You can save yourself a lot of trouble by simply paying attention, trust me.

Take notes. My favourite note-taking method is the Cornell method; I can make a separate post on that!! <3

"Quick notes." If you struggle with note-taking, try taking quick and messy notes. You can clean them up once you get home!!

Engage. If you have any questions or don't understand something, make sure to ask!! Most teachers really appreciate students who speak up. :)

No distractions. Turn off your phone, no chatting, you'll be glad...

After class ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

Finish your assignments as soon as you can. Go home, put on a cosy outfit, have a snack, and get working!! <3

Prepare flash cards. A great way of reviewing your notes, too... :)

Update your Study schedule. Write down any assignment and due dates, reading you must do, upcoming tests, etc...

Clean up your notes. Review them, highlight the important parts, and maybe even make them look cute!! :)

Don't avoid topics/Subjects you dislike. I know it is tempting, but you can't avoid them forever, so you might as well get them done

Structure and routine ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

Goals and Priorities. Keep them realistic and manageable.

Time management. Having a set schedule makes studying less overwhelming; it takes some discipline but is so worth it!! <3

Develop a routine. Figure out what works best for you; I prefer studying in the morning or at night.

No "zero days". Even if you can only do a bit, do it!! NO. ZERO. DAYS.

Remember your goals. Dreams will keep you motivated; remind yourself of what you're working for!! <3

Self-care and balance ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

Don't forget about your hobbies. You need to do things that make you happy, so make time for those things!!

Maintain a balanced diet. I know chocolates and junk are tempting, especially when you are busy studying all day, but you're not doing yourself any favours.

Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. 8 Hours. Non-negotiable.

Exercise regularly. Even if it's just a walk, put on some headphones, listen to music, and give yourself a break. <3

Care for your social life. Reach out to your friends, make plans, and keep in touch; a good work-life balance is critical!!

Romanticising ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

Study dates. Meet up with your friends at a cosy cafe, discuss your work, and have some fun!! Studying doesn't have to be all serious all the time ;)

Silly Pinterest boards. Visualising your goals will help you find motivation!!

Music to set the mood. I have a bunch of playlists on my Spotify that might help!! <3

Cosy sweater and candles. The cosy Rory Gilmore vibes haha...

Getting a coffee before class. A little treat before things get serious... Simple pleasures, you know? :)

Babes, The hiatus is OVER, and I'm finally back!! I got a lot of asks on studying, burnout, and school in general, so I thought, why not start off with a little student guide?? I Hope October has been kind to you, and school hasn't been too overwhelming (though I know it, unfortunately, has been for many of you), and I'm glad to finally be back!! <33

As always, Please feel free to add your own suggestions and tips in the comments!!

✩‧₊*:・love ya ･:*₊‧✩

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mrsmikaelsxn · 9 months

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Tired

masterlist

pairing: theodore nott x female reader

warning: somewhat angst to fluff, kissing, cursing, jealousy, best friends to lovers, protectiveness, c*rmac mcl*ggen

summary: you were theo's childhood best friend and he waits for a time when you will love him back

a/n: hello lovely people! i am alive and well! i sincerely apologize for not writing in awhile, i just haven't had any motivation to write lmao (this isn't proof read because its really late and i'm tired, so i apologize for any mistakes) (i chose the song below because i've been singing it for weeks and it somewhat relates to theo in this)

song: i'm just ken - ryan gosling

Theodore Nott was tired.

And in love.

With his best friend, nonetheless.

You may be wondering why he was tired. Well, he was tired of feeling upset whenever you called him your best friend. He was tired of hiding how he felt towards you since he was a thirteen-year-old. He was tired of the jealousy that took over him whenever someone flirted or went out with you.

Theodore was tired of many things.

At the moment, he was sat in the Great Hall as Draco complained about his classes. He wasn't listening, though, no he was staring at you as you happily talked with your friends in Hufflepuff.

Someone then sits in the empty spot next to him and pats his shoulder. He tenses slightly and Draco stops talking. They both turn and look at Cormac Mclaggen.

The two Slytherins practically have to hold in their vomit at the mere sight of the Gryffindor.

"Can I help you, Gryffindor?" Theo's eyes narrowed at the hand on his shoulder.

Cormac awkwardly removes his hand and sucks in a breath, a smirk making its way to his face. "You can't, but she can." He tilts his head and his eyes land on you.

Draco and Theo's eyes follow his line of vision and Theo clenches his jaw. "What do you want?"

"I want that friend of yours. And for you to set us up," he shrugs.

Draco glances back and forth between the two boys. He knows how protective Theo is of you, and that this isn't likely going to end well.

"Let me get this straight... you want me to set you up with y/n?" Theodore says with disdain.

"Exactly. Something about her just has me wishing to be in her bed, you know?"

Theo slams his hands on the table, causing some people nearby to look over. He glares at the boy and speaks lowly, "The fuck did you just say?"

"Don't tell me you aren't friends with her to get in her-"

Draco cuts him off before his could finish. "I suggest you don't finish that fucking sentence, Mclaggen."

"I'll take that as my sign to leave. Just let me know whenever you're done with her, I'll be waiting with open arms... and legs," he laughs as he walks out of the Hall.

"Fucking disgusting asshole," Theodore mumbles.

"I can hex him if you want," Draco says. "Maybe get Snape to take points from Gryffindor."

"Both sound good to me."

His eyes make their way back to you and he sees your eyes already on him. You smile brightly at him and he grins back. You turn around so he doesn't see your face warm.

One of your friends, Hannah Abbot, giggles and pokes your cheek. "Someone's blushing."

"Am not!"

"Yes you are. Don't lie," she leans in, "you have feelings for Nott."

"I don't know what you are talking about. We're just friends."

"Mhm." Hannah looks at you with an incredulous face, "I'm pretty sure that friends don't make heart eyes at one another."

You gasp, "Theo and I do not make heart eyes at each other."

Hannah whispers, "I know that you know that you like him. I hope that you believe me when I tell you that he looks at you like he's about to get down on one knee-"

You gently place your hand on her mouth and look at her with wide eyes. "That's enough." You remove your hand but chew on your lip for a second. "Does he look at me like that?"

"Yes! And for the record, I think your children-"

"Merlin! I can't do this today," you drop your head into your hands as Hannah rants about how beautiful your family would be.

It's been two weeks since then and whenever you hung out with Theo, you tried to decipher if he was looking at you the way Hannah has claimed he was.

Theo, however, noticed how you seemed more bright than usual. What had happened that made you more smiley and happy? Did you find someone?

He runs his hands over his face and sighs.

"Theo? Are you alright?"

He sits straighter at the sound of your warm voice. "Yes, love. I was just lost in thought."

"Oh? And what thought has you frowning like a kicked puppy?"

You lean back against the tree behind you and put your legs out straight, crossing your ankles. You pat your lap and Theo places his head down. Your hands start to play with his hair, like muscle memory.

"Nothing your pretty head should worry about," he says quietly as he stares up at the stars. It was past curfew, and you weren't one to break any rules, but how could you say no to your favorite person? Especially when the note was attached to your favorite flower.

"Hm, well I don't like it when you frown. I much prefer to look at your gorgeous smile," you chew the inside of your cheek and start to braid some strands of his hair.

His cheeks turn a light pink and his eyes meet yours. "Gorgeous smile?" He feels a flicker of hope that there's a slight chance you reciprocate his feelings.

"Yeah," you mumble with a light laugh.

He smiles and before he could say anything else, something clicks above him.

You grin as you hold your polaroid camera above his head. "Gotcha."

He fake pouts and tickles your stomach. You burst out laughing and the camera falls to your side, "Theo! Stop, please!" You beg and squirm.

"Okay, since you asked nicely."

"You know, I think I can be tickled to death. I don't know about you, but personally I can't really breathe when I'm being tickled."

He lets out a breath, "I don't know if I can, I haven't been tickled before." He sits up a tiny bit and leans on his elbows.

You huff, "I suppose we'll just have to find out, won't we." You quickly move so that you're next to him and tickling his stomach. His head falls back as he laughs. You smile and he grabs your waist and rolls the two of you over so that he's now on top of you.

Theo gazes down at you. He sucked in a breath at your closeness and couldn't stop his eyes from dropping down to your smiling lips. 'So pretty,' he thinks to himself.

His arms are on both sides of your head and he leans down a bit so that if either of you were to move just an inch, your lips would touch.

"Theo," you whisper breathlessly.

"I really fucking want to kiss you right now," he says quietly.

You look at his lips, "So do it."

Without another word, he connects his lips to yours and both of your eyes flutter shut.

He feels a burst of butterflies fill his stomach. As childish as that may sound, he's had countless scenarios of kissing you. But never would he have expected it to be so perfect as it was.

Your lips were soft and warm. His were too. He slides his tongue across your bottom lip, and you open your mouth happily.

His tongue wanders your mouth and your hands go up and comb through his hair. He lets out a content sigh against your mouth and pulls away the tiniest bit. He gives a shorter and sweet kiss before his tongue is against yours again.

You taste of strawberries and cherries. That was because you ate the two fruits almost every night for dessert.

He tastes like slight cigarette smoke and vanilla, as odd as that may seem.

The two of you could drown in the taste of each other.

Theo pulls away places a gentle kiss on your forehead as he sits up and pulls you against his chest.

He rests his head on your shoulder and kisses your neck. "I love you," he whispers.

You furrow your eyebrows. You've said the three words to one another before, but you hoped he meant it another way. Which you were almost sure of after the kiss. "I love you more."

"No," he shakes his head against your neck. "I'm in love with you."

You feel your heart rate increase and the largest smile is now on your face. "You are?"

"Of course I am. I've been in love with you for years. You don't have to say-"

You turn and face him. "I'm," you kiss his cheek, "in," you kiss the other, "love," you kiss his forehead, "with," you kiss his nose, "you," you finally kiss his lips and Theo melts.

You pull back and look at his blushing face. "Oh!" You just remember your camera and reach over to grab it.

You pull the printed picture from the top and look at the developed photograph. "Look how beautiful you are," you turn the picture to him.

He takes it from your hands and brings it closer to his face. Even he could see the lovestruck look on his face as he admires you from your lap.

"Lets caption it," you say.

"I think you should write, 'first kiss and love confessions'," Theo tilts his head.

"That's perfect," you smile.

"Not as perfect as you, darling," he winks.

You playfully push his shoulder, "I never took you as a sappy one."

He dramatically places a hand over his heart, "Oh how you wound me."

"Will a kiss make you better?" you ask with a glint in your eyes.

"I believe it will, sweetheart."

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