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belphieslavenderscentedpillow · 3 months

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Let’s talk dates: obey me! brothers+ Solomon and their dates for you

Super hyped to do this, and thank you for all the love on my previous posts! Everyone is very much appreciated 🥹 like I said tell me if you have any requests, and I’ll get to them!

This post is quite fluffy, with a few kisses here and there. I hope you enjoy!

-not proofread twice-

Lucifer

A dinner at a fancy restaurant

Specifically Restaurante six

Will plan his date at least two months in advance for two reasons:

1. He has a specific seat in said restaurant that is his very favourite, which is why he will make sure to get it for his favourite human

You deserve only the best, and he won’t settle for anything less

2. He makes sure his brothers know in advance so that they don’t destroy his date night with their antics

So on date night everyone is on their best behaviour

On the night of the date he will pick you up punctually

He’ll link his arm with yours and takes you to said restaurant

Will let you order a super fancy meal

You can literally get anything you want

After the eating he’ll take you on a romantic walk

Fingers intertwined and all that cute stuff

Then he pulls out a small box “will you marry me?”

No not that, he’ll take out a small necklace with a beautiful gemstone in the centre

Will put it around your neck all romantic; letting his fingers trace your skin while hooking the necklace

“Wow it looks beautiful on you.”

Mammon

A very cute beach date

His dates are usually pretty spontaneous:

“Babe let’s go to the beach!” On the most random days

You guys drive there with his car, listening to your favourite songs, screaming your lungs out with the windows down

Once you get there you go into the changing rooms, change and then notice how hot you guys look

Cue make out session in the changing room

On the beach you guys do various different things; swimming, playing in the water, sun bathing, making out etc

Will have a competition to see who can build the bigger and better sandcastle

Will buy you an ice cream if you ask

For dinner he lays a picnic blanket on the sand and brings out his „famous“ cheese sandwiches!

you guys watch the sunset while holding hands

At the end of the day you guys get in the shower together, washing off the sand from each other’s backs

He will give you his jacket to wear once you guys finish showering

Drives you home, with a hand on your thigh

Talking about life while the stars twinkle in the night

Leviathan

He takes you to an aquarium! The biggest one in the whole devildom!

He’ll ask you if you wanna go a few days prior

But he’s been preparing for months

He practiced how to ask, what to say on dates, where to bring you, literally EVERYTHING

He wants only the best for you damnit 😭

When you say yes he was absolutely ecstatic!

Wait you said yes?!?

Cue more planing and stressing

Asks his online friends how he should go on about it in the most optimal way possible

On the day of the date he’s a nervous wreck

Fussing with his shirt, refusing to make eye contact and a few very short yet fast sentences

He just needed a bit of time to relax

So once he gets to the aquarium he relaxes

Besides the ocean is his natural element, so he feels most confident around sealife

He tells you a few things about the fishes you see

The conversation is light and easygoing, doesn’t feel forced and everything you guys say comes out naturally

Very soothing if you ask me

If he feels especially confident he’ll hold your hand with red cheeks

Will point at pretty fishes saying: this one is you

When you go to the bathroom he converses with the fishes asking for pointers

Will buy you matching keychains

Once you have seen enough fishes for a day he walks you home

Gives you a quick kiss on the cheek as goodbye

Satan

Plans this date a week prior and asks you two days beforehand

Brings you flowers like a gentleman

A lovely two-part date: first he takes you to one of those places where you can make your own teacups

While making the cup he completely fails

Sure he’s read about it and how you do it but when they give him the clay he literally goes; wtf why is it so sticky and doughy

Tries to make it look good but.. well

He applauds you for being able to do it so well

A surprisingly good sport about not having the most pinterest worthy cup

Just uses his inability as an excuse to go on another make-your-own-teapot date with you

The painting was a whole lot smoother than the making of the cup

That being said it still wasn’t extraordinary

When you finish he lets out a small laugh at his cup

For Lunch he takes you to a cute cafe

Let’s you pick anything you want

He even lets you eat off of his plate

Which is good because his food always looks better than yours…

While going home you WILL come across a cute kitty

And he will start petting it

Gets whiny when the cat likes you more but secretly finds it utterly adorable

At the end of the date you two exchange cups

His cup is on your shelf, and yours is on his

Asmodeus

Takes you to a lovely botanical garden!

Asks you a day or so prior

You guys get ready together; matching outfits are a MUST

First you guys get Lunch at a super popular cafe. Then you go to the gardens!

The gardens are absolutely beautiful! He takes lots of pictures of you the plants

Butterflies always land on his hair and make him look like a disney princess

Sadly bees like him too, so count on lots of squeals of happiness and fear

Points at two flowers growing next to each other and names them after you two🥹

After that he takes you to a pandora store and gets you two matching bracelets the ones with the hearts

I hope you don’t mind paparazzi because his fans are everywhere

that totally didn’t happen because he couldn’t stop yapping about his date with you on his live

Don’t worry they won’t disturb you, actually they just take a bunch of cute photos of you two and send them to asmo

And because he has so many fans you guys get a LOT of pictures

Seriously his fans have been graced with the ability to take the most gorgeous pictures!

Not to mention you guys look so darling in every. Single. One.

Asmo saves ALL of them, literally ALL OF THEM on his phone

He has one especially cute picture of you two as his lock screen and will always look at it when he feels a little sad

Beelzebub

He‘ll take you to a fangol game

Asks you about the same time he gets the tickets, which is like a month prior to the gane

So he‘s exited about your date for the whole month!

On the day of the date you guys go there by bus

When there’s only one seat available he lets you sit on his lap, or if you don’t like pda then he‘ll just make the other demon scram 🤷‍♀️

He is one of the seven rulers of hell so theres not much the other demons can do or say

When you get there the crowd is HUGE

Beel of course gets everything you can get from the food stalls

He even shares his food with you 🫣

While watching the game he lets you sit on his shoulders because he likes having his face between your thighs so that you can have a better view

After the game he takes you to one of those restaurants where you can get a huge bowl of ice cream and whoever finishes it gets it for free

Totally didn’t get inspired from the main storyline

Will steal a kiss from you at the end of your date

Belphegor

Takes you on a super sweet carnival date

The plot twist is he takes you to one at night

I‘m to 99% sure that devildoms carnivals open at night you can not change my mind

Like they open at 7PM and go till the whee hours of 4AM

He asks you super spontaneously but planned the date like a few weeks prior

You guys walk around holding hands looking absolutely darling

If you want to go on a specific ride but the line is too long he will pull some strings to let you skip the line

Whatever ride you feel like, you can get 🥴

Is the type of person to think rollercoasters are a little slow

He‘d probably fall asleep on one of them tbh

Is amazing at those rigged carnival games

He has that crazy good aim, so always when he wins a prize he gives it to you

He loves the smile on your face when he wins

You guys share cotton candy together

Anddd he buys you those candy hearts saying some cheesy stuff like; „because you stole my heart“

When you guys go on the ferris wheel it stops when you’re at the very top

Something about „technical issues“

So you guys watch the small stars while waiting for it to start running again

He then looks at you with those; ‚I love you‘ eyes

When your eyes connect he leans in and gives you a romantic kiss, making him feel like he’s on top of the world (literally)

Solomon

He takes you on a picnic at night

At night for what reason you ask? Because he wants to take you stargazing

He asks you rather spontaneously, but plans the date a few days prior

Please get your own picnic snacks/food cause you don’t want to find out how „dragonhead soup“ tastes

He walks you there, and everything is already set up

Telescope, blanket, a few pillows, food

He lets you sit between his legs, letting you lean your head against his chest

Honestly looks at you more than he looks at the stars

„Wow they’re beautiful.“

„yeah..“

And while saying that looks at you

He plays with your hair, and tucks them behind your ear

He prolly hums small tunes while looking at you

Asks a small „can I?“ before kissing you

And of course two shooting stars go by you while you kiss🥹

All credits go to @belphieslavenderscentedpillow

#obey me #om! mammon #om! leviathan #obey me x reader #obey me asmodeus #obey me satan #obey me leviathan #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me shall we date #obey me belphie #obey me solomon #obey me solomon x mc #obey me solomon x reader #obey me levi x reader #obey me mammon x reader #obey me belphagor x reader

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redxwater · 2 months

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Waiting Room (Chapter 1)

Leon Kennedy x F!Reader

(Warnings chapter 1 : depression, anxiety, harsh language.)

Chapter 1, Chapter 2,

° - ° - ° - ° - ° - ° - ° - ° - ° - ° - ° - ° - ° - ° - ° - ° - ° - °

“Yeah, no i’ll be fine Claire. Call you later” a young blonde boy spoke through the phone. Call connected to Washington D.C from NYC. On the other line in the capital was a younger woman. “Okay, text me if there’s anything!” The brunette girl smiled before hanging up. Claire was Leon’s best friend, but she isn’t always capable of helping him. She tries her best though.

Leon didn’t want a foster family, even if it was for the better. He lived with Claire’s family for a few months before getting a scholarship in a music major. He tells himself he’s lucky, in a way… Claire has known him for 4 years, since they were freshmen. Her family loved Leon, sometimes they hoped they would end up together, but they never did.

With a deep sigh, he rolled out of bed and put on the jeans that were on the floor, and a sweater. He threw on his old white sneakers and put some deodorant on. He grabbed his phone and headphones and was out the door.

He didn’t brush his hair, he hadn’t for 3 days. He stuffed some gum in his mouth and spat it out 5 minutes later, before heading into english class. He had been at college for a month, it wasn’t that bad, but he thinks it is. Everything sucks. Literally everything. Depression was something he struggled with even before he lost his parents. He tried therapy for a long while but didn’t feel like it worked.

Leon is a quiet observer, he knows most people in his classes. Well their names at least, today was no different. Despite his depression his grades are peaked, he has the same routine everyday and that includes school work. “Leon Kennedy?” the professor went through the absence list. He sticks his hand in the air and puts it down again. The man in front of the class nods and goes on until it’s done.

English was boring, Leon always has been a very smart kid. But maybe that was a good thing right now too. He didn’t have too put too much effort into everything.

The blonde boy hadn’t shared a dorm for a few weeks, he didn’t expect anyone to move in by now but when he opens his door at the end of the day, he’s surprised by boxes everywhere. He just tries to ignore it and grabs a glass of water.

Leon dials Claires number and waits for her to pick up “Hey what’s up?” The other line speaks. “I think i got a roommate, there’s boxes everywhere” he says while sitting on the small kitchen counter. “Oh cool! Are they nice?” She asks with enthusiasm, hoping Leon could make some friends, maybe. “Dunno, maybe. Haven’t met them yet. But it’s a mess here and i don’t like it” he mumbles a bit while inspecting the boxes in the room.

Leon has always been quite neat if it comes to anything but his bedroom. His bedroom is a mess, not disgusting but just a mess. “Can’t you put it all in their room?” She asks sounding a bit crisp through he phone. “Why would i? It’s not my shit. I’m just gonna be in my room.” He says and abruptly hangs up. He’s not annoyed about sharing a dorm. He doesn’t care. As long as they acknowledge each other’s presence and keep things to as much as a “hi” there should be no problem.

Leon settles behind his desk in his room and does some homework before playing a few games. Around 7 he goes out the door, there’s still boxes. Where could that roommate be?

“Oh shit i’m sorry!” A girl bumps into Leon in front of the dorm room he came out of. “Oh you’re my roommate!” You exclaim. “Right.” Leon dryly replies. You tell him your name and stick out your hand for the blonde guy shake. “Leon.” He shakes your hand. “Can you sort those boxes out?” He asks with an annoyed tone “Oh yeah totally” you smile and go into the dorm. “See you later, Leon” you close the door and Leon walks away.

You spend all evening unpacking and put stuff everywhere around the dorm. You accidentally open the door to Leons room, thinking it was the bathroom. The room is dark, it smells fine. Mostly like men’s deodorant. Even in the dark you see clothes everywhere on the floor. You shrug your shoulders, you’re not the neatest either.

After 2 hours Leon returns and looks slightly surprised for a second to see you. He’s not used to living with someone in his dorm. He doesn’t say anything and just walks by to his room. Before he can enter you speak “where did you go?” You ask trying to get to know him a bit. “Doesn’t matter” he cuts off and closes his door. Weird guy, you think. But there’s something about him, you just know.

Thanks for the votes on my poll pookies!! Hope u like it

#leon #leon kennedy #leon kennedy fluff #leon kennedy smut #leon kennedy x reader #re4 #resident evil x reader #leon kennedy x you

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tip-top-cloud-surfer · 1 year

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Left at the Altar - Hangman (Part 3)

Pairing: Hangman / Fem!Reader (Ex-Girlfriend!Reader)

Word Count: 2.7k

Warnings: Some Light Angst; References to Sex; Second Person POV ("You"), No Y/N, No Physical Descriptions of Reader

This work, all of my other works, and my entire blog are 18+ Only.

Summary: You struggle with your life back in Texas. Is California calling your name?

A.N. I double-checked and I'm pretty sure that I added everyone to the tag list who requested it and has their age on their blog, so hopefully this works.

Part 1 Part 2 Epilogue

Master List

Sitting on the couch of your childhood home, you held your wine glass close to your chest.

It was officially two days after you were left at the altar and the last forty-eight hours of your life were practically a blur.

After your night with Jake, you were forced to deal with reality. You moved out of the apartment that you shared with your ex and went through the process of literally cutting him out of your life one photo at a time. Literally. Your name wasn’t on the lease since you moved into your ex’s bigger apartment a few months ago, which worked to your advantage.

You dropped off anything to do with your wedding at your ex’s family’s home, including your wedding dress, since they paid for it and told them to do whatever the hell that they wanted with it. Or they could bring it back to you and you’d burn it.

And your last spiteful move against your ex was cancelling your honeymoon reservations and the extra ticket that he bought his mistress the night before they were supposed to fly out. And the best part was that they had already checked in. Your ex tried to angrily text and call you after he got to the airport, but you just blocked him and moved on.

And now here you were: moved into your childhood bedroom, with your life in a suitcase and a bunch of taped up cardboard boxes. Truly living life to the fullest. Well, at least you had some wine that your mom may or may not have stolen from the reception venue.

The night chill seeped through the screens on the windows and the back door and forced you to pull on a sweatshirt. It was one of Jake’s old faded UT ones that he got when you were both sixteen. He quickly grew out of it and you were happy to take it off of his hands. You kept it in the deepest corner of your closet when you were living with your ex-fiancé, but now, you wore it openly.

You thought that it would have been inappropriate to wear an ex-boyfriend’s sweatshirt in the apartment that you shared with your fiancé. Of course, you thought that fucking someone else would have qualified as inappropriate, but perhaps you didn’t have your priorities straight. You should have started wearing it months ago.

Taking a sip of your wine, you sighed and leaned back against the couch.

Even in the darkest days of your relationship with Jake, he never once degraded you like your ex-fiancé did. Sure, Jake could be an asshole and you were the first person to tell him that he was being an asshole, but he wasn’t irredeemable. He had his faults but his heart was always in the right place.

Your ex on the other hand; there was absolutely no way to justify his decision to break up with you over text on the morning of your wedding day. You were done with him and with the whole picture. Luckily, you already deleted and cut up all the remaining photos of the two of you together.

The sound of footsteps caused you to open your eyes and turn towards the stairs. Your mom slowly walked downstairs and smiled softly when she saw that you were still awake. Making her way over to you, she sat down beside you on the couch and squeezed your shoulder.

“Couldn’t sleep?” she asked softly.

“Something like that,” you replied, just as quietly.

“How are you feeling?”

“I’ve been better,” you answered honestly, trying to force a small smile.

“Did you hear from Jake?”

“Yeah, we’ve been texting a lot. He apologized for fact that he had to run out.” You nodded slowly, pursing your lips together as you let a breath out of your nose. “But it’s not his fault. That’s just how it always goes with the two of us.”

“Why does it have to work out like that?” your mom asked softly.

“That’s just how it’s always been, Mom. You know that,” you replied, turning to stare down at your wine glass. “When we’re together and alone, everything is perfect. Everything feels right and I never ever felt like that with someone else. But then reality hits and we have to go back to the paths that we picked and . . . we’re separated in the end again.”

Your mom nodded solemnly, though her expression gave away her opinion on the subject. Straightening up, she glanced out the window at the rose bushes that sat right below your childhood bedroom window. The ones that were planted there for a very specific reason.

“I remember when your father bought those bushes,” your mom stated wistfully, causing you to pick your head up and turn around.

“You mean when he tried and break me and Jake up?” you mused, shaking your head.

“He was trying to prevent you from sneaking out and Jake from sneaking in,” your mom corrected you with a small smile. “And how well did that work?”

“Not even in the slightest,” you replied without skipping a beat. You smiled softly as you glanced out at the familiar bushes, working through some of the associated memories. “I remember when he fell into them one night. He showed up the next day to school looking like he lost a fight with a cactus. Told his parents and everyone that he fell off a skateboard and they somehow bought it.”

“And did he come back after that?”

“He might have,” you stated with a shrug, earning a look from your mom. “A few times.”

“Exactly,” your mom responded, folding her hands in her lap. “He kept coming back. He keeps coming back to you no matter what life throws in front of the two of you.”

“He does,” you agreed quietly.

“I mean, how many times have the two of you been in a relationship?”

“A few,” you replied, earning another look from your mom. “Seven or eight, depending on factors that I need to be a bit little drunker to discuss with you, Mom.”

“My point is,” your mom continued, resting a hand on your arm, “you two keep finding your way back to each other. Over and over again. And honey, I have to tell you this honestly. I’ve never seen you happier than you are when you’re with Jake. You could combine your love for all of your other exes and it still wouldn’t compare to the affection that you have for Jake. And we can all see that.”

“I know, Mom,” you replied softly, trying to not choke on your emotions. Letting out a breath, you sunk further into the couch. “I was so stupid for thinking that marrying anyone else was going to solve any of my problems. Or make me happy.”

“Well, the good news is that your ex looks like a complete ass and now you get to go on and live your fairytale without that burden on your shoulders,” your mom stated, squeezing your hand. “And, honey, I want you to have your fairytale. I want it for you so badly.”

“I know, Mom.”

“And I think that Jake is that person for you,” your mom reiterated, rubbing your arm soothingly. “You let him go and he let you go because you two loved each other and you wanted what was best for each other. But despite that, you two still found your way back together so many times that you can’t even keep track. And that sounds a lot like love to me.”

“I love him, Mom,” you confirmed for her. “I do. I love him so much.”

“Then why are you staying here?” your mom asked you, causing you to sit up more. “Honey, I know that you love living here, but I don’t want you to hold yourself back from your happiness because you’re scared of taking that first step out.”

You nodded slowly, not really sure what else to say. Your mom pulled you in for a hug. Pressing a kiss to the top of your head, like she did when you were a kid, she squeezed you tightly to her chest.

“I just want you to be happy, sweetheart,” your mom whispered to you. “And I know that I taught you to not rely on other people for your own happiness—and you still shouldn’t—but you always just seem happier when you’re with him.”

“I am happier when I’m with him, Mom,” you agreed, burying your face into her shoulder.

“Then I think that you have your answer, sweetheart.”

~~~~~

After another long day at work, the Dagger Squad decided to go out for a cold beer together before taking some time for themselves. Except for Coyote, that is, who made some excuse about having to run a random errand.

It was a warm spring afternoon, so the Dagger Squad gathered out on the back deck to get away from the afternoon rush. Hangman glanced down at his phone frequently, waiting for your text. After your shared night in the honeymoon suite, the two of you had been texting frequently. Obviously, you were both busy, but you tried to text a few times a day.

But today, you weren’t answering. Jake didn’t want to jump to conclusions on anything, but it still struck him as odd. Especially because he knew that you had the next few days off because you were supposed to be on your now cancelled honeymoon.

“If you don’t put your phone down, you’re paying for the next round, Hangman,” Phoenix warned him, taking a long sip of her drink. “Remember Maverick’s rule?”

“He’s not here,” Hangman replied back, though he still stowed his phone away. “No need to try and win the teacher’s pet award.”

“Says the man who always sits in the front row of every briefing,” Bob spoke to his pilot’s defense.

“He’s got you there,” Phoenix stated with a proud smirk.

“You know, I think that I speak for everyone when I say how happy I am that the two of you chose to keep flying together,” Hangman replied sarcastically, reaching for his beer.

“You get crabby when Coyote’s not here to back you up,” Rooster quipped as Hangman took a swig of his beer. “Actually, you’ve been crabby for a while now.”

“Been hanging around you guys for too long,” Hangman replied without missing a beat, setting his beer down on the table.

“You just had a break from us,” Rooster pointed out, shifting in his seat.

“Wasn’t long enough,” Hangman stated, reaching for his phone again.

“Well, Coyote’s here to cheer you up,” Fanboy announced, staring down the boardwalk. Fanboy frowned slightly and straightened up a bit. “But he’s got a woman with him.”

That announcement got everyone else at the table to whip around to stare down the boardwalk. Coyote was, in fact, walking over with a woman. And who was that mysterious woman who may or may not have spent half an hour in an airport bathroom making sure that she didn’t look like she woke up at three that morning to get to the airport to get to San Diego?

You smiled softly and waved to Jake, who was completely shocked to see you in California. And, of course, you wore a sundress that he bought you. He felt obligated to get it for you after the two of you got a little handsy in a dressing room while you were trying it on.

“Who the hell is—” Rooster’s question was cut off by Hangman practically knocking over the entire table with how fast he got up from the table. “Jesus Christ,” Rooster complained as some beer spilled on his jeans. “Really, Hangman?”

But Jake was already bounding down the boardwalk, slipping around the tourists, civilians, and other naval personnel. The Daggers stared after Hangman with mildly confused expressions and curious stares. Except for Coyote, who grinned when he spotted Hangman hurrying over.

“You know,” Coyote told you with an amused smile, “I think that Javier is a very strong name for a baby boy. It rolls right off the tongue.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” you promised Coyote with a small chuckle.

Coyote shot you a wink before walking towards the Hard Deck. Coyote sent Jake a mock salute that Jake returned before continuing on his way. You stopped in your approach since Jake was moving fast enough for the both of you and simply held out your arms.

The rest of the Daggers watched as Jake scooped you up into his arms and spun you around. You laughed and hugged him back, wrapping your arms around his shoulders and your legs around his waist to avoid any risk of falling onto the weathered wood below.

“What are you doing here?” Jake breathed out, slowly placing you back on your feet.

“Well, I had a few days off,” you replied softly, smoothing down the creases on his shirt. “And so, I hopped on the first flight that I could get to San Diego. I thought that I would surprise you.”

“I’m certainly surprised,” Jake mused, resting his forehead against your own.

Gently guiding your chin towards his own, your lips met in a soft embrace. Jake wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you closer to him. You cupped his cheeks with your hands and deepened the kiss perhaps beyond what was respectable in public.

But hell, Miramar was a Navy town. This was far from the most indecent reunion kiss that this town had ever seen before.

Coyote walked over to where the other Daggers were gathered and took Hangman’s spot. If Coyote knew how Jake operated when you came to visit, he wasn’t going to need his seat back.

“Hangman has a girlfriend?” Bob asked Coyote curiously, assuming that he knew all.

“I think ‘girlfriend’ doesn’t really cover it anymore, honestly,” Coyote replied honestly.

Back on the boardwalk, you reluctantly pulled away from Hangman’s lips for a little air. Smiling goofily, you wrapped your arms around his shoulders and just simply took in the fact that he was right here in front of you once again.

“How long are you in town for?” he asked you, slowly opening his eyes.

“Until Sunday,” you replied, meeting his gaze again. “So, we’ve got about five days together.”

“No time to waste then,” Hangman reasoned, picking up your bag from where you placed it on the ground. “This is it?”

“Yeah, I packed light because I needed to fly standby.”

“That’s fine. You won’t need to wear anything once we get back to my apartment,” Jake stated with a wink, earning a light smack to his arm.

Jake led you over to where his truck was parked. He put your bag in the backseat and handed you the keys. Jake sprinted back to the Hard Deck to pay his tab and gift Javy some beer for the surprise. Dancing around the invasive and curious questions from the rest of the Dagger Squad, Jake returned to your side as fast as he could.

“Ready?” he asked, shutting his door.

“Ready,” you agreed, leaning over to press a kiss to his lips.

Jake backed up out of the spot and started driving to his apartment. Once he put his truck back into drive, he reached over and grabbed your hand, threading your fingers together. You returned the gesture and squeezed his hand, trying to not melt into the seat when Jake pressed a kiss to the back of your hand.

“I missed you,” you told him softly, smiling over at him.

“I love you,” he returned confidently.

“You always have to one-up me,” you sighed, shaking your head playfully. “But I love you too.”

“What’s not the love?” Jake replied with a playful wink.

“Did you want me to get out the list?”

“Harsh,” Jake stated, smirking a bit. “Don’t worry, I can think of a way that you can make it up to me.”

“I intend to . . . Lieutenant.”

Part 1 Part 2 Epilogue

A.N. I'm thinking that I might do an epilogue that's set a few months or years into the future. So, if you're not already on the tag list and want to be tagged in an epilogue, then reply or reblog with that request (though you must show that you're an adult with your age in your blog to get tagged). Thanks!

Tag List (First 50 since there's a limit):

@djs8891 @avengers-fixation @dreamsofouterspace @maverick-wingman @rosiahills22 @bethabear12 @laneylovesglen @blue-aconite @mercurio23 @awildewit @caitsymichelle13 @mamaskillerqueen @emorychase @the-romanian-is-bae @novagreen04 @gigisimsonmars @olliepig @laneyspaulding19 @clancycucumber230 @eli2447 @luckyladycreator2 @marantha @ashbatz @emilyoflanternhill @riri-is-agirlie @goslytherin @phantomxoxo @imaginecrushes @hotch-meeeeeuppppp @mizzzpink @miss-i-ship-it @topaz125 @healanette @sarahsmi13s @buckysdollforlife @looneylikesbooks @fighterpilothoe @lunamoonbby @fav-fanficssss @lorilane33 @angelbabyange @swanqueens-blog @ilovewriting06 @linkpk88 @mallerz @sky0401 @lunamooncole @potterheadandsherlocked @rogersbarnesxx @iammirrorball

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megumi-fm · 14 days

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26th to 30th Apr; doa🚲 complete!!

hi. gah. okay. here's my wrap up for the month

📝 prepped for and completed the last set of internal tests for this degree [2/2] (which I got through after much cribbing and whining and quite literally projecting study topics onto my blorbos 👍 ) 📝 started GRE prep!

🎓 got some gradecard related paperwork done 🎓 spoke to my prof regarding my internship deliverables for uni—report format, certificate requirements, etc etc

📥 I voted! it was the first central elections since I turned to an adult and the whole experience was quite interesting

💻 completed a bunch of tasks for my internship

💻 made like a super extensive flowchart about all the work done at my internship which took me like a total of 20+ hours T-T 💻 finished preparing my Uni Internship presentation! 💻 submitted the presentation to the assistant guide, waiting on her response to make changes atm

🍶 7+ glasses of daily water intake 🎵 svt's new single is out and I've been going insane about it and thus this challenge comes to an end... I had started this off as an 18day daily habit tracker but then it kind of grew out into a challenge for the month. Special thanks to Yumi the loml <3 (@thelastneuron) for starting the Days of April challenge (Yumi idk when you'll see this but i miss you and I hope you've been kicking ass during your hiatus). also massive thanks to Zip (@zipstidbits) for leaving the kindest comments/tags on my post during the past week and to Tanishka (@booksbluegurl) who is literally the sweetest and has been sending in asks and keeping me company during this challenge <3

there's a lot more i wanna yap about in regards to how the month went but I'll leave that under the tags xD goodnight besties <3

month end brainrot

april started off with dips and more dips but by the end of the month it feels like I've caught up. productivity is a wave so as long as I keep riding at it i'll be okay.

also. progress is cumulative. even the seemingly inconsequential completion of daily tasks has lead to an overall improvement through the week. things add up

I spent a lot of time this month (and moreso this past week) feeling dejected that I've been leaving my tracker posts (and my digital planner entries) incomplete... but like. the whole point of trackers and planners (and this studyblr) is to get work done. work is the priority and the tracking is a means to an end. so if im getting work done that is already a win. yeah... i've had to keep reminding myself that

there is no one-tool-fix for tracking and journalling. what works for planning out one task will not work for the other. I need to strop trying to fit all my plans into one formulaic strategy box

on that note. it's time to return to handwritten journaling. digital journalling (notion + YPT + discord + tumblr) was fun while it lasted <3 but my brain needs novelty again so it's time i switch back. I think I finally have an idea for a system that could be sustainable for me... although I say that every time I switch to a new form of tracking. but hey. as long as it helps me get work done for whatever duration of time, it's good enough

using kpop and kdrama references to make notes and study really paid off. ngl I only did it cause I was super desperate but incorporating stuff I couldn't understand with a topic I really like paid off. It also gave me the motivation and momentum to study for much longer than I otherwise would have

last but not least. my water intake has been really good this month! I've also been eating healthy and I've been cooking more my phone usage has also been reduced by a lot. sure none of them have had a perfect streak but i started at zero and it feels like I've levelled up quite a bit. the exercise component has been a bit difficult to maintain given my workload :/ i need to figure out what to do about that...

yep. that's it for now. this month really tired me out, I think im gonna lay off daily challenges for a while. For now I guess I'll stick to my (bi?tri?)weekly tracker posts xD

#20doa🚲#studyspo #queued #18dayht #studyblr #study motivation #study blog #accountability #studying #student

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scientia-rex · 8 months

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Reasons my life is better this year than last year:

-Umbrella reason: new job

-Work next to doc who consistently laughs at my jokes

-My boss doesn't get passive-aggressive and also doesn't mind profanity

-My boss, despite being straight, fully supports me providing gender care and likes to send me CME opportunities for conferences I can't go to because I can't take time off without a lot of notice but it's still a nice thought that he saw "LGBTQIA+ healthcare" and went "oh I know a doc who does that! she should go!"

-On my other side is an MA I get along with fabulously bc despite having different native languages we both appreciate the importance of snacks, naps, caffeine, and being a little bit snarky

-She always brings me a donut if somebody leaves a box in the break room and she knows I might not see them until they're gone

-My MA sits behind me and is possibly my long-lost twin? Except that she's a foot taller than me, GOD, I wish I was tall, but we're on the same wavelength at all times and we have very similar interests and senses of humor and I love it and I hope she works here until we both retire

-The other people who sit in our room with us vary between a delightful nerd who I only haven't befriended harder bc she has kids and is always making a point of going home to them on time, an older doc who works per diem for us now and taught me how to do greater occipital nerve blocks on a whim and is actually a decent person despite being an old white privileged man, and our dermatology provider who once told a patient I was, and I quote, "cool as fuck," which is funny because I think SHE'S cool as fuck

-Our nurses are the best. Just the literal best. They go all out, on a daily basis, to not only make sure I do the minimal amount of bullshit busy work, but also to make sure patients are getting high-quality care and that they have positive interactions with our clinic, and they never kick a request back to me with "we can't do that," they will always at least ask around to see if someone else knows. I love them. I love them so much I literally sometimes cry about it.

-Our chief referral coordinator is so much fucking fun AND so good at her job. I ask her for things and they just... happen??? She's relentlessly competent and also loves animals and also when I mentioned I need more plants gave me seeds from her double-ruffled hot pink poppies, which I WILL be planting next year.

-Seriously, I love everybody at my new work. It's been 10 months and I feel like a rescue animal, finally starting to creep out of my shell and have a personality, after working at my prior clinic for 4 years (2 in residency) of absolute chronically understaffed passive aggressive toxic workplace hell. Like, I love the providers at my former clinic, I love the support staff, I loved my patients and I loved what I got to do, but there simply weren't enough people and everyone was always being told to do more and more and more with no additional time or resources or compensation, and that was a big part of why I quit--I could see, very transparently, that the administrators didn't give a hot shit about how hard I was working and how I was busting my ass, any time they saw a chance to shaft me out of any benefit, no matter how small, that might save them money.

Life is better this year. I think it's going to be even better next year. I had no idea working in medicine could be this much better. Working in medicine is going to be draining, no matter what you do--but a good, solid, competent administration makes the difference between draining and soul-crushing.

#the attending dr. kristophine

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good7luck · 2 months

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personal, real life

negative, depressing (giving me a headache, at least)

mention of illness, hospital, passing away, etc

asking for your opinion(s)

(more under the cut)

This is very personal all of a sudden,

but I'd really appreciate your thoughts on this OTL

I know I cannot provide every single info and the full context, but I did my available best for now.

Summary exists at the end!

My mother (full housewife) has been ill and currently hospitalized since a while ago (as a part of her medical treatment, not some unexpected emergency), which would last for a month or so.

My father (full worker) has been pretty kind to her overall and helped her with everything needed.

But...he has had a problem with her housework ways, mainly with piles of stuff (which is sure a lot tbh). Recently, he has tried to randomly "organize" things (unbox, see, re/move etc) at home multiple times, which annoyed and stressed her very much everytime.

Now that she's in the hospital and not coming back anytime soon, it seems he decided to take it as a "chance" to re-organize all the stuff piled he didn't like in the house. Even if he's obviously not young in 40s or such, not so healthy, and still needs to go to work almost everyday.

The thing is...he's even going to dispose of her old religion-related books (Buddhism), including mostly given as presents when she was doing some volunteer works at some religious place(s) years ago (maybe some were purchased, idk). It's not that she read them often, but she has saved them there for years for a reason. And yet, today he already took many of them out of the shelf and put them in boxes to remove later (maybe in 2 days). Of course, he did NOT get any permission from her and did NOT tell her any of this at all.

In fact, I, too, have had a problem with a lot of the boxes and things she has purchased but often abandoned for years, even if I understand it's cheaper to buy things a lot on sale at once. I do feel very irritated when I newly find a bunch of food which expired 2021 or such.

Still...I wouldn't carelessly touch her religion-related books or such?? Especially when she's suffering from the illness right now, and the religion has been one of her rare comforts (even long, long before the illness), and the books are basically her private, not his?? I'm not even so religious myself, but this looks quite rude and abusive??

Unfortunately, he sincerely thinks he's ~finally~ doing the "right" job that should've been done long ago, and realistically it's plain impossible to persuade him. He would never listen, much less change his mind because of me (or even her, perhaps).

All I can possibly do is probably to hide her books. But it's quite a lot for my room; he's checking almost all the spots in the house, and no guarantee he wouldn't enter my room. I'm not sure if it would even work tbh, as he seems sooo determined about throwing away "unnecessary" things, and he might notice some are missing idk.

Honestly, I'd like to let her know about what's going on to her books, so that she's at least aware and can make her own choice. But...she's literally sick and very weakened, she had better not get stressed. She's going to take some serious treatment soon, which might or might not succeed. Strictly speaking...the possibility of her passing away in the hospital is not zero. It's surely not a good idea to add more problems there.

Before she got hospitalized, I did tell her that he might dig up the whole house, and she said he wouldn't cuz he should be too busy with his work (especially when she cannot do the housework for him). I was more joking, and she sure didn't take it seriously, but now my concern came true, much worse than I ever imagined.

I'm pretty sure she'd get super angry, no matter WHEN she gets to learn about this. Or, would she actually be able to take it better if she hears about this after coming back home? Cuz it's all "ended" then, after all?

I just...don't understand why he had to make things (even more) complicated and worse. Seriously, it's even not like she's very likely to pass away soon. He didn't mean this for sure, but more than often he doesn't realize how insensitive and impolite his action can be. Her religion books were not so many and so not a real problem, in the first place...

Summary:

My mother (housewife) is currently hospitalized due to her serious illness. My father (worker) is going to dump many of her old religion books (Buddhism) in 2 days, which were already half-boxed today. I could try hiding them in my room at best, which might not succeed. And/or I could contact her and inform her of what happened, which would give her a chance but definitely stress her a lot.

...I feel I'm probably being ridiculous and immature here, but I'm genuinely so stressed about this now, especially when I have my own real life problems to take care of as well OTL Maybe I just wanted to vent idk ^^;; I cannot guarantee I'd strictly follow the poll result or comments, but I'd like to know what other people would do. I appreciate your attentions!

(sorry this post cannot be reblogged and can be deleted in the future. this post is also not meant for screenshot or such spreading for obvious reasons. thanks for understanding...!)

#good7luck talk

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kikiwritesfanfic · 6 months

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Hello my lovelies~ <3

So, as you’ve probably noticed, posting has been pretty scarce the past two months. I’ve been dealing with a lot of stuff happening to me irl and trying to make it all work. But! I want to spark my love for writing again. So with that being said, I would like to make a few announcements, and ask a few questions here to gauge popularity of my stories. ^^

1. My ask box is open for all of my long form fanfics right now!!! I’ve been thinking this one through for a while and I would really like to involve everyone with my characters. I enjoy interacting with you all so please, don’t be afraid to send a question to any of my characters. To clarify, my ask box is open for Tainted Magic, Tainted Blood; The LoveBug Virus; and A Summer to Remember <3

2. I’m also taking requests!! (DCA fandom only of course.) If you’ve got a particular fic idea that you’d like to see me write for you, by all means, send it in!! Just keep in mind that I’m not super woman, so if you send in a request and I don’t respond to it, that means that either A) I literally just haven’t gotten to it yet, B) I’m not taking requests anymore, C) you didn’t include enough information and I’m not sure how to go about writing it, or D) I just didn’t want to or couldn’t write that particular prompt for some reason. Also, keep in mind that I am 22 and I am NOT a completely SFW blog, including that I do occasionally write smut/explicit content (even if you haven’t seen it here). So do not be afraid to ask for things of that nature!

3. I am doing writing commissions! I know that I haven’t made a complete post for it yet, but I promise they’re open hahah. If you would like to commission me for a piece, feel free to send me a message and we can discuss my rate, what I’m willing to write, and what you’re looking for!

4. And last but not least-

#kiki writes fanfic #kikis trying guys #new chappies coming soon i prommie #thank you all for being so patient with me #also I’m so close to 100 followers #anyways pls repost #kiki shut up

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back2bluesidex · 2 years

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Not a Dream

Summary: She thinks she is not good enough for him. She thinks she has nothing to offer. But she doesn't know she is all he wants. But why?

Pairing: idol!Hoseok x Staff!Reader

Genre: Angst, Fluff, a very very little bit of smut, Hoseok is a bit obsessed.

Wordcount: 4.8k

a/n: This is my very first ff and I do not know anything. Forgive me for the mistakes and tell me how to be better.

----------------

"what?" I exclaimed for the second time in 2 minutes, obviously because whatever I was hearing wasn't making sense at all. "But what's the need for me there?" I asked the manager again clearly not understanding why I was being escorted to the party that wasn't my place to be.

Jhope, Jung Hoseok, was throwing his grand glam party for his second solo album "Jack out of the box''s release and it was huge to say the least. Almost the entire Kpop industry was there. The top floor of the hybe building was then holding more wealth than some of the small countries. As expected, staff not having any direct connection with the album production weren't allowed to go even near the top floor today. I was certainly one of the uninvited ones. That was at least what I knew until Hoseok's manager came to escort me to the party.

"Why is she being invited there when we're not even allowed to step near the floor? Just because she's an army?" Sooah, one of my teammates almost cried with pure jealousy laced in her voice. Well, it's not that I don't know the answer. I do, just don't wanna admit cause it all feels like a dream. There were some sort of things going on between hobi and Me. No, we weren't in a relationship. It was somewhat complicated.

I was in the army and all of the seven adored me because of that. They never had a dedicated army among their staff ever before. After having me they literally started to treat me as if I represent the entire fandom. It's quite understandable because they were always so curious to know why the armys are more interested in their thighs than their faces (just joking).

However, for me it was quite different. Getting to know them was a blessing. I got to know that they were even better personally but they live a very different life. I realized quickly that my love for Jung Hoseok was better to be cherished as a normal Fan-idol thing because my intensity would only make my heart break. And it did, it broke more and more every time I realized I am not perfect for Hoseok, I can never be. Obviously, he was the global star, BTS's Jung Hoseok and I was Y/N, a normal and very very ordinary girl with nothing to rock people off of their socks.

But apparently Hoseok thought differently. Ever since I got drunk after a late night emergency meeting and blabbered the shit out to him about loving him so fucking much, he decided I am the one for him. God knows why. Whenever I try to tell him that he and I can't work, he seems to get more and more determined. This has been going on for some months. I have tried to tell him that this job is my dream and it's precious. I can't get fired and if I do, there's no way I'm getting another job in this kpop industry because by then I'll be known as the staff that "seduces the idols". I love him but I have to live, I have parents to support.

But it seems like he is adamant to make things work between him and me. As much as it flutters my heart, it scares me as well. What if the higher ups catch it all? What if they rule me out of my dream project of Weverse magazine? What if they ask me to quit? What if I end up returning home! No no! Not a chance. I have to stay professional. Only if I wasn't a hybe staff, I would gladly accept his offer and would be already deciding upon our children's names. But no. I can't. Moreover, one thing I have understood, this glam life, fame, and attention aren't for me. It's all too complicated for me. I am better with my simple life. Now that I am done seeing Bangtan up close, and telling Hobi how much I love him, I can look forward and find a man to love and to be loved and settle down.

However, Jung Hoseok won't let me.

He had a different plan all along. He had a different plan when he dragged me into the empty copy room after seeing me giggling with one of male colleagues at the company cafeteria. He slammed me on the wall, whispered "You're mine" in my ears and pressed his lips on mine with such passion. Kinda possessive right? The only thing that his action did was make me fall for him even more. Making my strong-girl-pretense harder than ever.

Only if my higher ups knew that I have been locking my lips with one of their biggest assets behind their backs then I'm sure, I was nowhere to be found in the company or maybe in the country, who knows.

Back to the present, I still can't believe Hobi really wants me to be there in the party, when he clearly knows that I can't socialize, not even with people of my stature, and guests of his party were everything beyond my league.

"It is his order Y/N and you know he can be really stubborn at times" his manager said. Well, who knows it better than me at this point. I knew there was no benefit of revolting to the manager. I need to call the mastermind. Excusing myself from them I went away to call Hobi. He received the third ring. "Hey, when are you coming? Why aren't you here yet? It has been almost 10 minutes since manager hyung left." Hoseok was very excited, I didn't even know why!" I started to put down my words carefully. "Hobi, you know I am not a great fan of parties and more specifically a party like yours. I am just a very big misfit there. I am sorry but I don't think I should..." "You're coming Y/N, if you don't want manager hyung to escort you then I myself will go and I am serious about it." His voice was demanding, authoritative even. I knew he was capable of leaving the party to take me with him and that would cause unnecessary drama, so I had to give in.

I stepped into the party and it was a world itself. A world that knows nothing other than Gucci, Prada, Louis Vuitton, Chanel, Balenciaga and I couldn't feel more self-conscious in my $20 zip up hoodie and a pair of loose fit ripped jeans. At this point I was sure, people would not hesitate to think that I am in charge of cleaning services. I spotted the man immediately. He is called sunshine for nothing. So glamorous and beautiful with the aura that he wears, everyone buzzed around him like bees buzz around the most aromatic flowers. I felt so small there that I wanted to run away. And I decided that I would after meeting him, telling him that I kept his request, oh well, his order.

My reverie was broken with a honey dripping voice that I can recognise even in my unconscious mind. "Hey, Y/N" Jin said, walking up to me and my smile reached my eyes. "Oppa!" I was about to jump on him. "Why do you look like you wanna run away?" He asked. "Because that's exactly what I wanna do, Oppa. You know that I am nothing but a misfit here. I really did not want to be here but Hobi won't listen to anything." He smiled, and I melted. "Y/N you know that you're special to him and on his special day he just wants to keep his special person by his side. But I understand your point too. Why don't you talk to him? Tell him how you're feeling here?" Jin completed. I sighed, "I want to talk to him but he is busy, which is natural."

"What's the tea?" The man of the night was now standing just behind me, "what are you two talking about without me?" "We were just talking about you Hoba." Jin said, "Now I'll leave the two of you alone and meet some people. Enjoy the night Y/N" with that he left with a wink. And within an instant, I felt myself being dragged by my arm to a room, which seemed to be the storage for the drinks and food for the night.

And here I am again, pressed against another wall, the man towering over me looking at me as if he will devour me then and there. "I know Jin hyung is your bias wrecker or whatever you say. But you should remember that I am the main character. I am your main character." His tone was kinda sultry but I wasn't the one to show that he intimated me easily, so I threw my counter attack. Teasing him a bit I said, "So you're now jealous of your hyung? That's a shame". I didn't expect him to agree but he did and said, "oh, hell I am. And you know what? I should mark you as mine. Everyone should know you belong to me or at least belong to someone already. What do you say baby?" I didn't get what he was saying, "what do yo---" and I was cut off since my lips were attacked by his ever waiting one. I obviously didn't waste my time in kissing him back but in the midway I felt my arms being pinned over my head as he attacked my neck in the purpose of sucking a bruise. I understood his assignment now. As if I wasn't already ashamed of showing up here wearing E-mark Sunday market clothes that he had to increase it more by giving me hickies. "Hobi please no!" I protested but it was of no use. He kept on sucking my sweet spot while I wiggled as much as I could. His lips left my skin once he was satisfied enough. He pulled his head up and looked deep into my eyes, while I did the same. His low voice ringed, "now you're marked and anyone that approaches you here should be shown that. Understood?" I gulped and before I could reply anything his phone vibrated signaling that he was gone for a bit too longer than he should.

We both left the storage room one by one interval by interval to dodge suspicion. Once I was out, he was nowhere to be seen. More like, he was at his own place, dancing and mingling with some of the goddess looking ladies. I couldn't help feeling a bitter feeling inside of me. And I stood there alone, like the low-class introvert that I was, watching others like I'm watching a TV, close to my eyes but far from touch. The more I watched him that night, the more I realized, he and I are from two different worlds, and these worlds can't collide. They should remain at their places for the peace of the universe.

I was deep in my thoughts and my eyes were almost glassy with the impact, when another known voice approached me. "Y/N!! Did not expect to see you here! What's up?``said Lee Sung hoon, one of the graphics designers, hybe always works with. We have worked with him during some of our Weverse magazine projects. He is also in the team that worked for Hobi's album this time, so even if he didn't expect to meet me there, I expected. And now I was embarrassed by his question. I parted my lips to reply but didn't know what to say, "I -uh". He cut me off, "oh well, it's dumb of me to ask you the question, since we all know you're close with the boys. So, I am sure you're here as part of the guest list." "Well, yeah, kinda" I replied. It was both fortunate and unfortunate that I found him there. Fortune because I stopped feeling way too out of place and lonely. Unfortunate because I then had to reply to all of his flirtatious remarks that he has been throwing to me since the day we met.

We were talking about something which gradually landed in Hoseok. Sung Hoon said, "He is the life of the party. Isn't he? I mean, Man look at him, all the ladies are going crazy even the older ones too. " I smiled and nodded. "You too have a crush on him, I know," he added. "Is it news? The entire company knows he is the reason why I am still single." I replied. Sung hoon was quick this time, "yeah, I know I know but don't you think you're wasting your time and your youth?". I questioned him, "What do you mean?" He continued, "Look at him Y/N, he is the Jung Hoseok! The richest member of the biggest boy band of this world. One of the major shareholders of the company itself. There are female idols dying to get into his pants. No, I am not saying that he is out of your league but at the same time I am saying it, you will only get yourself hurt. He is like a dream to people like us. They can only be polite to us but they can never love us back. That's the reality." All of it hit me hard and he continued, "I have seen you looking at him as If he has star casted in his body. So I am worried for you. As a senior in this industry, I would suggest you refrain yourself from falling for an idol. They will entertain your idea but they won't return your feelings. They will just use you as a thrill, the thrill of having the forbidden fruit but nothing more." Was it all I was to hobi? A forbidden fruit?

Thinking about it then I realized that Hoseok has never said that he liked me or he felt anything for me. His weird affection suddenly started and then I found him saying I belong to him and nothing else. Never did he say that he liked me but he claimed my lips with every chance he got. Now that I could think about it, all the clouds seemed to be in a silver lining. To him I was just a thrill, which was just a purpose of free entertainment. He could never love to be back or at least like me cause I don't reach upto his standard. Finally it felt like I understood the deal and I couldn't take it anymore. I was just staring at the ground, desperately blinking my tears away. I couldn't hear a word sung hoon said. I finally pulled my head up and looked at sung hoon. "I will leave now Mr. Lee, it's getting late and I may miss the bus. Enjoy the party." Saying that I turned my heels to walk away but he called me back, "Y/N wait! Let me drive you home. It's pretty late anyway." "No, no! The buses are still available I can manage." I smiled at him but he looked at me being determined. "Have you even eaten anything yet? I don't think you did. Let's get outta here. I am quite bored as well. Let's grab dinner at the snack bar and then I'll drive you home. What do you say?" He offered. I wanted to be alone but at the same time I didn't want loneliness to devour me. So I accepted his offer and left the party with him.

Hoseok's side:

The man was very busy today, after all it's his listening party and he had high profile guests to attend. But his heart was with that one person. His heart left his body in the store room. One song played after another to let the guests hear those exclusively. But all he was waiting for was that one song. The one that he wrote for her and added to the album at the very last minute. It was the night when she let out her drunken confession, he found himself looking at the stars from his balcony. The lyrics came into his mind when he thought of her face, her lips, her eyes, which held so much love for him. The love he never found in anyone else ever before. And finally today he was going to play The song. He planned it all. He planned to be in front of her when the song would play, he planned to look deep into her eyes and tell all the things he couldn't. He will do it tonight. Just two more songs before the party ends, before that one song played, he had to find her.

Hoseok looked for her but there wasn't any sign of her. He was clearly stressed and angry when he couldn't find her. He proceeded towards the exit and enquired the guard, "Have you seen Y/N? Did she leave?" The guard replied in positive and his anger now reached to the peak. "Did she leave alone?" He enquired again. "No sir, Mr. Lee was with her. They left 8 minutes ago approximately." Okay! So she left with the guy who just finds the opportunity of getting her in the bed? He was so mad, so mad! He would punish her well this time. Without thinking much he exited the party. He went out of the back entrance as fast as he could, he wanted to catch her on the way and pull her back to the party. He went to the parking area but he saw sung hoon's car still parked, knowing it was his car from the name plate attached to the car for emergency contact purposes. He rushed out of the parking lot and got in the street and he could already see his beloved giggling with sung hoon sitting in the coffee shop just across the street through the glass walls. He wanted to punish her, he promised himself he would punish her but right now he needed to be at the party. He returned and asked the dj to skip the last song, he said it should be kept as a surprise track.

They say acceptance is the key to happiness. But to me it was the key to the dam of my tears, they kept on flowing. It was past 1 am and I kept on crying since I arrived at home. No, I didn't expect him to make me his girlfriend or anything then why did it hurt so bad? Why did the idea of Hobi just playing with my feelings tear my heart like a paper? I stared at the patterns that my mood lamp drew at my ceiling and my silent tears made their way to my pillow. It was about 10 past 1 when the doorbell rang, making me startled. There was no way I could have a visitor this late at night. Then who could it be? I was so afraid. What if it's a robber or a sick rapist? A lot of people know that I live alone! What if it's a stalker? Another round of impatient boor bells rang. I gained some courage to finally open up the door. Turning on the lights of the drawing room I held the door knob of my 1bhk apartment. My senses left me making me dumb enough not to take a look through the peeping hole. A grasp left my lips upon opening the door, seeing Hoseok standing there with dark eyes.

"Hobi? What are you doing here at this hour?" I asked him in confusion. Well truth to be told, I knew why he was here probably but I was confused why didn't he call me first to know why I left the party. To be honest, it hurt me more when I didn't receive a single call from him which led me towards strengthening the ground of my assumptions. "Why? Did you expect someone else at this hour?" His voice was low but he almost growled and I knew he was super mad at me. "No, I mean, come in '' I asked him to enter my embarrassing home.

Within what feels like a fraction of a second, I felt myself yet again being pinned at the nearest wall. Did this man have some fetish for pinning me? I thought to myself. His eyes were dark and those were measuring me from up to down as if I was naked, when the truth is I was clad in my comfy shorts and an oversized shirt with no bra on.

His grip on my wrists tightened when he further pushed me to the wall and said, "how dare you leave the party? Without informing me? That too with another man?" He hissed. "So what would I do when I feel like a misfit at your glam party? That was not my place to be in Hoseok! Why don't you understand? You have seen me at parties before! I am the one who always stays in the corner! Even in the company parties where I know most of the people, I stay aside and you know it all very well. So you should understand how out of place I would feel in a party full of celebrities! I was so fucking embarrassed with the way I looked today among all of them! I can not even name the brands they were wearing! Their shoes were worth more than my entire apartment! Yet I was there! Just because you forced Me. Just because you wanted to make a fool out of me. I was fucking embarrassed and anxious Hoseok! Why the hell did you want me there? Why?" I burst out being unable to contain it anymore. My tears rolled down my cheeks and Hoseok's eyes softened. He let my hands free and wiped my tears away with his thumb. He gently said, "do you really think I would force you to the party just because... Just because.. I wanted to make you look like a fool? I wouldn't do that Y/N. I wouldn't even think of doing anything like this even in my wildest dreams. There was a reason, baby. There was a reason why I needed you there." And I was still angry with everything. I burst out again, "and need me for what?? For what exactly Jung Hoseok? To show me how different your and my worlds are? To show me that I can't even love you? To show me that I am nothing but a cheap thrill to you? To make me believe that I can never be the one for you?". "Shut the fuck up!" His eyes were ablaze. He was clearly infuriated at this point. He held my shoulders and pushed me to the wall again. "You don't get to say anything! You just don't get to put your words in my mouth! I fucking wrote a damn song for you to tell you how I feel for you and forced you to the party so that I could let the World know that you're mine and I'm yours. To let all the guests of the party know that they are only listeners but the girl right beside me was the muse. But what did you do? You left! You left with that nutjob who desperately wants you in his bed! And when I went to look for you, I found you giggling with him!! Tell me is that fair? Tell me is it fair that you choose to stay away even when you love me? Tell me is it fair that I had to chase you when you could easily run into my arms? Tell me Y/N is it fair that you choose to stay oblivious when I..." His voice shook a bit but he continued anyway "when I am desperate for you? When I am in fucking love with you?" My eyes widen with the sudden confession. Was it really not a dream? The man of my dreams was in love with me? Is it even possible?

Before I could say something Hoseok continued, "but now, I have had enough. Enough of this push and pull game of yours. You never reciprocate to me properly but you also never hesitate to kiss me back when I kiss you! What do you want Y/N? Stop giving me mixed signals! Stop being so afraid! Tonight either let me claim you completely or push me away. If you decide to push me away I promise I will never disturb you again." With that he left my hands and just stood in front of me. I wanted to push him away so badly but just the thought of him stopping "disturbing me" knocked me off my breath. He was right. I was being a coward, I was being afraid of the future and I declined to enjoy the present. That's it. Yeah! Carpe diem! Let's live in the present. Hoseok loves me. The man of my dreams loves me. I needed to claim him. And I pressed my lips on his. He didn't even take a second to kiss me back. But he pulled back immediately and said, "So should I take this as an answer?" I looked deep into his eyes and said, "Claim me, Jung Hoseok." "Are you sure? Cause once I claim you, there's no going back." He breathed out. I pressed my lips on his as the response and he devoured me without wasting a second.

And that night he claimed all of me. He claimed me by sealing his lips with mine. He claimed me by touching me everywhere he could. He claimed me by painting bruises all over my body. He claimed me by stuffing me with his fingers and his dick. He claimed me my fucking me raw and shooting his cum in me. He claimed me by naming my v-card in his name. I was sore the next morning and the pain shot through me, the moment I opened my eyes. I actually didn't expect him to stay over. I thought he would leave early when the streets would still be deserted. But there he was laying beside me, looking at me with his sleepy eyes. oh! Was I really waking up beside the man of my dreams? It isn't a dream right? It couldn't be, I was still sore with his claim all over me. "You didn't leave? I thought you would leave." I said. He smiled at me and replied, "I didn't come here to leave Y/N. And I am not leaving till the album releases. I need you to listen to the song, with me beside you." I smiled at his response, I was still in a daze. It was All hard for me to believe. "Can I ask you something?" I asked, staring into his dark brown orbs. "Sure, go ahead." He replied. "Why do you love me, Hoseok? I don't have anything to be loved by a man like you." I finally let out my biggest question ever. He smiled at me, pulling me closer with his one arm draped around my waist. "I love you because you love Jung Hoseok more than you love Jhope. Jhope is loved by millions but Jung Hoseok still craves to be loved. The love that I found in your eyes for the first time when we were introduced. But I didn't think much of it until you decided to confess after being drunk that night. Your love is precious to me Y/N and I don't know if I can find a love like yours if I let you go. And this is what made me adamant to make you mine. And when you didn't reciprocate just because you thought you're not good enough for me, it made me angry. And I burst out seeing you with someone else. Now, remember you are mine and I am yours. So don't you dare ignore me. I'll teach you tough lessons if you do." He completed it. I giggled, shoving my head in his bare chest and we stayed like this until it was time to listen to his song. The song that was written solely for me, oh what a feeling to be a muse. Sitting on my couch being wrapped around in his arms, we kissed and listened to, "Not a dream"

"Oh I am standing before you

It's not a dream

I am reaching out for you

It's not a dream

Don't be so afraid

A love like this is hard to find

Tell me you love me too

Cause you are all there in my mind."

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chimielie · 2 years

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hello lia! sora here :) so sorry for dropping off the face of the earth for a while, things were a little tough. not sure if by drabble requests you meant something like this, but i'm currently working on a longfic centered around kuroo (and someone else!) on ao3 and i wonder if you might write something for him if you're in the mood... maybe something with the line "why can't you see that i like you?" ofc no pressure, and hope you have a good week! take care!! + hopefully this staves off hinge LOL

object impermanence

word count: 1.2k

cw: mild angst with a happy ending, possibly a confusing timeline, reader is an art student

a/n: oh my GOD that’s so exciting eeee can’t wait to read it!!! tysm and i hope times get easier for u :(( sending my love. also sorry this is so late i could Not figure out a plot but i’m actually quite happy with what i spit out (it’s 2 am this opinion is liable to change with proper rest)

It’s in a café, a pretentious, dimly-lit place with oil paintings on the walls and a back stair with a balcony for smoking that things unravel. You’re careful, or you try to be, but—well. The heart wants what it wants, and yours is very willful.

Kuroo is shoved into the corner next to you, with the crushed-velvet pillows you were so afraid to spill coffee on. There had been three of you earlier, you and your art history TA and him, and since the café was a literal sardine box you had found yourself trying to balance minimizing body contact and acting like he had the plague. Your TA had had to leave in a rush, and you’d been secretly a little glad, especially when Kuroo didn’t request that you take her former seat across from him.

You remembered him the first time you met, folding himself into your tiny apartment and looking sheepish when you had looked away from the dingy window above the sink you’d been sketching and asked who he was and why he was in your house. It had turned out that he was your roommate’s boyfriend, had been for about two months, and were they ready yet?

They weren’t, so you invited him to sit on the other chair at the table and wait. You hadn’t expected him to talk to you. You hadn’t expected him to be nice.

When you blurted you have a really striking face, I’d love to draw it during a lull in the conversation where you’d had no other option than to focus on the arrangement of features some people (bad roommates) would call handsome, you hadn’t expected him to ask would you really?

You were a bad roommate, though they didn’t know it, because you hadn’t kept in touch with them after moving out but you called Kuroo at least an hour every day before bed.

And you were a bad friend—to Kuroo, not your ex-roommate, because you’re pretty sure you had loved him from the first moment he’d asked after the perspective of your little window sketch.

“Your hair,” he says, and has to twist his whole torso around to get a good look. He catches a piece of it in between his thumb and forefinger, twiddles it back and forth and peers at it like it’s a specimen in a lab. “You changed it.”

“Hardly,” you say. “I just got a trim.”

“It’s different this time,” he says. “Isn’t it?” You purse your lips and blow across the top of your super-fancy tiny coffee cup, a futile exercise since you already drank half of it.

“I went to someplace new, I guess,” you say, and he lets out a whoop that makes you laugh and forget the rest of your words.

“I knew it,” he’s so smug. “I always know.”

“Yeah,” you bat at him so he drops your hair and it springs back, you can feel it in your scalp. “Who even notices things like that?”

“Me? When it’s you.”

“Oh, stop it.” You think. “What am I allergic to?”

“Peach skins and nickel,” he says immediately. “And when you were little you broke out in hives when you ate a pomegranate but you liked it so much you kept eating it anyway and eventually the reaction went away.”

“Your memory is insane,” you sip your coffee, staring at the rapidly diminishing amount. You can’t afford another one, not on your budget as an art student. Ugh.

“No,” he reiterates. “Only when it’s you.”

It started (really started) after your roommate had broken up with him, when you’d come home in the early morning and found him sitting outside your door, brown eyes red-rimmed and holding a box of his things like it weighed a thousand pounds. Let me get you some water, you’d said, and I’d ask you to come in, but. Ah. Sorry. Do you want my breakfast bowl for tomorrow? You had tried to be kind, even though it was hard. You were tired and you didn’t know what had happened and you still had to live with his ex without them hating you.

A few months had passed—you were no vulture, and had no way to reach out anyway. He had bumped into you on vacation in Paris, grabbed you by the shoulders, and looked at you in a way he never had before. It made everyone else on the busy street disappear.

I wanted to talk to you again. Would that be okay? I still have the picture you made me, somewhere.

Your friendship ripened with the seasons.

“I believe you,” you laugh.

“You don’t!” He runs a hand through his hair, jokingly frustrated, you think. And devastatingly attractive. “You always—like—downplay your importance in my life. Like you think I forget about you when I can’t see you. But I think about you all the time.”

“Kuroo, don’t,” you say, but it’s a mistake, because you always address him formally. Your last defense against him finding out all the boundaries you want to cross. It’s a mile between you, and your hip is still touching his.

“Why not?” He spreads his arms, and knocks over your tiny coffee cup. The rest of it spills out over the table, not even enough to drip off, and neither of you notice. “Why can’t you see that I like you?”

“Because you don’t,” you choke, and you hate getting emotional like this, hate that you hate confrontation. “We’re good friends. I’m not gonna be a rebound.”

“You’re not,” he says. “You won’t be.”

“I believe you,” you say again.

“Stop that,” he groans, looks at you again like he did in the street in Paris. “If you don’t want me, that’s fine, I’m just so bad at not wanting you.”

Kuroo is awful, eyes gleaming in the lamplight and hair oil-black and dressed like he’s old money, like he’s trying to impress you.

“Of course I want you,” you say, hot and still not leaning away from him so you can breathe.

“Good,” he looks a little starstruck, and maybe that’s when you start to believe that he can look at you and tell the truth. “Good. I can draw you up a list, later, when you’re not so fucking close to me and so—”

He tilts your chin with his fingers and kisses you and it’s a word between the both of you, a whole language of touch. The overripe peach falls off its branch and bursts on the ground. The coffee soaks into the discarded cloth napkins.

“You make it hard for me to think,” he says when he pulls back, breathless. “But I can write you an essay, ten pages, twelve point font, with citations, of all the ways I love you to prove it. I swear it.”

“A picture is worth a thousand words,” you say, and take his hand when you kiss him again. And it’s not careful like some of your first kisses have been. And your heart sings.

#ask n answer #sora!#kuroo x reader #haikyuu!! x reader #haikyuu x reader #hq x reader #hq!! x reader #kuroo tetsurō x reader #kuroo tetsuro x reader #kuroo tetsuro angst #kuroo tetsuro fluff #haikyuu!! angst #haikyuu x reader fluff #haikyuu!! fluff

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hardsr · 10 months

Text

update

hi guys, long time no see. i’m so sorry i’ve been gone and haven’t updated for what has literally been a year. i never expected for me to take this long to upload another fic but being completely honest these past few months turned chaotic for me with just some personal matters, school, and one of the biggest reasons: writers block. i’m gonna split up some updates for you guys so i’ll do the bad news first then the good news to cheer you guys up <3

1. the bad news. first of all, i’m so sorry but i think i need to retire the tattoo fic. i feel like i’ve been working on it for far way too long now because i don’t have the passion to write it and as a result, have lost it and it feels like a burden to me now. i’ve only been to write very small amounts at a time and then take a 10 year break, another small amount and then another 10 year break. i feel like i’ve let you guys down a lot since many of you have been asking it and i’ve been promising it for so long now. that being said i will try to compress what i have into a short read of what i have to release some time in the future. please do not expect an entire long fic like kingdom blossoms as it will only be a few thousand words. once again i’m very sorry for letting you guys my beloved readers down.

2. the good news. as a result of me not writing the tattoo fic, i’ve gotten inspired to write a new one with a new plot. i’m very excited for it and i feel my passion flowing for it. it’ll be a full length read like kingdom blossoms however i’m still deciding on whether to make it a one shot so you guys can read it all at once at a further date or release it in chapters so i can at least release what i have at a time. there will also be similar themes to kingdom blossoms. i’ll give you guys a hint as to what this fic is about: friends to enemies(?) to lovers, seulgi discovers the underground scene of boxing and joohyun is pining for her. i wanted to make a poll on whether or not i should make this omegaverse since the last time i wrote about it, it got a very well reception so i have a poll linked here.

once again i’m very sorry for letting any of you down if you were excited for the tattoo fic. i will release the short version of it when i see fit but for now i will be focusing on this new boxer fic i have which i am hoping to release very soon.

love you all and see you till the publish date <<<333

#seulrene #hardsr #boxer au #boxer!seulgi

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fan-mans · 1 year

Note

send aran headcanons plz 👉👈

Oh god... you have opened an absolute wormhole, my dude. I'll try and contain myself but no promises, lmao

First and foremost: All of his boxer info is wrong. Well, almost all of it. This is in part because there are 2 Aran Ryan's in the wvba, the east coast Aran in new york (His wii iteration) and the west coast Aran in seattle (His snes iteration). For the sake of clarity, just know that I'm talking about the wii Aran for this ask. The other half is that (Wii) Aran basically lied about everything- all of his documents are forged and he's just been rolling with the lies since he entered the wvba.

(It's a long, long, story, but I'll elaborate if someone asks)

Aran is very close to his family! He adores his parents, grandma, and younger siblings and does everything he can to support them. This, unfortunately, means that his living conditions aren't the best, but it's family, and Aran knows they need his match money more than him.

He's the eldest of 11, with 4 sisters, 4 brothers and 2 adopted brothers. He had to help take care of his siblings his whole life, but at around 14 his family hit hard times and he dropped out of school to fill in a '4th parent' role that his grandfather's death left. As such, his relationship with his adopted brothers and youngest two siblings leans more towards parental than anything. (I have more of this and will expand if someone asks)

Because of all this, Aran is one of the 3 boxers who can actually parent (The other two being bear hugger and kaiser). He basically has a 'parent mode'- like, literally if there is an unattended kid within a 20 meter radius of him, he is now that kid's dad. On more than one occasion (During another boxer's match ofc) left his seat and returned with someone's kid sleeping in his arms.

He loves kids to death and taking care of them is something he really enjoys. He'd love to have a bunch of his own kids one day.

Since his house was so crowded growing up, living in new york is a very, very lonely experience. As much as he likes having his own space, he doesn't like how empty his apartment is, even with his dog. Nights were especially bad before his dog because, without someone sharing a room or bed, he has nightmares that leave him irritated and paranoid.

His dog is an Australian shepherd/border collie mix named Cu Chulainn, who he normally just calls 'cu'. This dog has as much energy as Aran and is probably the only reason he does cardio at all. Also, Cu has very strong herding/protecting instincts, which means he is more than happy to go apeshit on anyone trying to fuck with Aran.

His mental health is an absolute clusterfuck that deserves its own damn post to go into.

He doesn't cheat out of maliciousness, or at least not fully. He cheats because he feels like he has to. The minute he saw Hippo and Great Tiger in the ring, he knew playing clean would do him no favors. He's a good boxer outside of his cheating, and could probably do well as a clean fighter but doesn't trust his skill enough - especially with his family on the line.

He's so so so creative. This man paints and draws and sculpts, though he prefers painting and sculpting. He also loves knitting! All of the world circuit (Aka his besties) have at least one hat/sweater/pair of mittens made by him. Costumes are his jam too- he will spend months hyperfixating on a perfect costume for halloween.

He couldn't decide on short or long hair, so now he has a mullet that he cuts all by himself thankyouverymuch (Which is why it's so badly cut lmao)

His facial hair grows black in the summer/fall and more dark reddish-brown in the winter/spring. His dad grows a blonde beard in the summer/fall and a reddish-blond one in the winter/spring.

He adores growing his hair out when the boxing season is over. He's barely recognizable with a full beard and looks exactly like his dad. Shaving is the worst part of the new boxing season and it always takes him a few days to recover from the dysphoria all that shaving causes him.

Aran is punk as all hell. He's got 11 piercings and a handful tattoos and plans to get more. All of his clothes are either thrifted or hand-me-downs to some degree and patched to hell and back. His aesthetic tends to scare people, which Aran is perfectly okay with.

Speaking of clothes, he refuses to wear fake leather or wool. He knows how the real stuff feels and hates the feeling of pleather or acrylic wool. He insists the real stuff is better and why he's never cold in the winter.

Aran cannot wear ties. He can wear scarves, chokers, collars, anything but ties. Shirts fully buttoned up are also uncomfortable for the most part, but he has a few that fit him.

#aran ryan #punch out wii #punch out #headcanons #ask game #can you tell he's my favorite?#because he is #I wub u stinky rat man #i have so many more so PLEASE keep these coming #my hcs

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gobbluthbutagirl · 1 year

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summer 2022 was peak My Job like. every day i would come in and more carts would have mysteriously vanished. we already had not had baskets for several months. there was a one-legged old man with his dick out in the parking garage. the a/c died for like 5 days in june and it was somehow infinitely hotter and more humid inside the store than it was outside and i literally almost died from dehydration because the former hr guy(bastard that he was) would NOT stop sending me on cart runs. a bald guy tried to steal like $1400 worth of stuff including at least eight pairs of haircutting scissors. a guy had a box full of bees in the parking garage. a guy smeared chocolate pudding all over the windows & door because he was mad he couldn’t come in after closing and it looked like shit(literally). someone forgot their skateboard that had the words “fuck you” on it in the store and never came back to retrieve it. an old man grabbed shaving cream off the shelf and smeared it all over not only his face but also everything in his cart and then asked if we had “a restaurant”(“do you mean a restroom?” my coworker had to ask) where he could wash his face off because he had “a mess going on here.” this happened the same night as the pudding incident. the entire FOS team called out on july 3rd except for like 3 people and it was the single craziest night i have ever experienced. one guy even caught covid that night and was out for like 10 days. i developed a stomach ulcer and did not know what it was and simply assumed i must be dying and went “this is fine.” i had to clean up human piss. i had to clean up human shit. i had to clean up chips & salsa that a guy had grabbed off the shelf & then begun eating & then dropped on the carpet. i scrubbed the world’s dirtiest & nastiest target cart for over an hour until it looked presentable enough to have in the store and barely a month later it got stolen too. i walked out of one shift not even 2 hours in because the former hr guy made me so so mad and then 2 days later i showed up randomly to yell at him. i said, “you’re an asshole and nobody likes you. i have heard a lot of people say a lot of things about you and NONE of them have been anything good!” and he said, “please don’t quit. i will pay you for an hour for coming in here today,” and once i calmed down a little i realized what an objectively funny situation that was so i stayed. i chose to request my birthday off not because i had plans but because i figured out he’d be the closing lead that day and i could not stand his ass. the day after my birthday i found out one of my 2 favorite leads was leaving and the other one had shaved his head kendall roy style. three hours later a pipe at the starbucks exploded and flooded everywhere and ruined everybody’s shoes except for mine because mine already fucking sucked. later that week we lost our last cart.

they threw a party on the former closing lead’s last day for both her and the former hr guy and everyone brought gifts for her and no one brought gifts for him. and he seemed super offended that i in particular hadn’t gotten him anything so he stopped me right before i clocked out for lunch and went, “holly are you gonna miss me at all? even a little bit?” and i was like, “yeah, i am gonna miss you, and you know why? because i love complaining and you give me more to complain about than everybody else who works here combined. and [his replacement] has NEVER given me ANYTHING to complain about EVER.” it was a lie though. i do not miss his ass. there was an incident where someone actually slipped on a banana. we thought it was just the peel but when i investigated i saw it was the whole banana. half the morning team including multiple leads caught covid and so did the interim hr guy we were supposed to have for two weeks. they finally sent us baskets with wheels after like three weeks of having no baskets and no carts whatsoever and the shoplifters had a field day. satan took a shit in our elevator and had to be removed from the store. i stayed late one night to help out & found a package of moldy rotten deli meats that were a brand we don’t even sell just sitting on the shelf. the power went out for like 2 hours and we had to close and the leads let somebody out when their shift ended and forgot to lock the door again and satan got in while we weren’t even open and immediately began stealing. a guy smashed a can of meat against the shelf until it exploded and also pissed in a starbucks cup and on the floor. i broke the world record for listening to “i started a joke” by the bee gees. and that is literally just what i can remember off the top of my head!

#my job wrapped

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billgavemeextrachips · 1 year

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My housemate wants me to sweep downstairs and vacuum the common areas at least twice a week because of my cat’s dander. This is triggering a lot of shame about me being a “slob” and also worry that I won’t physically be able to keep up a routine like this because of my Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome. But I can’t say no because I need a good reference when I start looking for a new place to live next month, and also I just… Can’t Say No. It’s kind of one of my issues.

My cat (11 next month) is now on gabapentin for her arthritis pain. I can tell it’s helping her, but the only affordable option is a liquid that I have to squirt in her mouth twice a day while pinning her against me and she hates it. She tries to hide when it’s med time and cries when I pick her up anyway. So that’s a thing I have to deal with.

Last night I actually did some Google searches about rehoming a cat and I burst into tears. (Disgusting, I know.) Money isn’t too much of an issue yet, and her “behavior problems” are mostly my housemate being an asshole. (Cat is not aggressive, doesn’t pee outside of box, she’s just struggling with grooming now that she’s older.) So I don’t think I’ll have to do it, but even just thinking about giving her up wrecks me.

My right shoulder keeps trying to climb up to my ear due to tight muscles (painful) and I keep getting a fluttering feeling in the left side of my chest (not painful but scary.) I think these are both stress-related but don’t know how to make them stop.

I’m supposed to help my family with Dad’s move-out this Saturday. I don’t know how useful I’ll be, being a Physical Wreck™ and all. Nor do I know what I’m walking into emotionally. Mom and Dad have been civil so far (that I’ve seen) but my brother’s birthday dinner was awkward AF and left me feeling very sad for everything we’ve lost.

I can’t talk to my ex-therapist because she’s bought into (literally paid hundreds of dollars for some scam-ass program) a bunch of life coaching mumbo-jumbo and now I can’t be messy™ with her for even two minutes before she’ll try to make me “look for the positives” and “remember my strengths” and “create a plan” and shit.

I can’t talk to my best friend because she has the empathy of a rock, and also she just started a new job with an insane commute so if I do call her, I’ll have to listen patiently to her rant about that for half an hour before she even asks me, “So how are things?”

I can’t confide how I’m feeling about my parents’ divorce to either of my parents (obviously) or to my brother, because Dad straight up emotionally abused him and the last thing he needs is dad’s golden child whining to him because she feels sad.

I can maybe talk to my kid sister or my grandmother about how I’m feeling about the family stuff, but I’ll have to tread lightly. I can’t talk to either of them about the housemate stuff because 1) my sister has no life experience here, and 2) my grandmother is a clean freak who doesn’t like cats so she’d be the opposite of helpful.

Meanwhile my self-esteem is in the shitter because I keep ruminating on my family’s fucked-uppedness, and where’s the line between being kind versus enabling the assholes in my life, and who would ever love me, etc., etc., etc.

And to top it all off, an employee I’ve been hounding for overdue paperwork for months just pulled a stunt that I can only describe as “malicious compliance.” I passed it on to my boss via email and told her I actually wanted to cry. (Again, ew gross, I know.)

I must be ready for my full cyber-conversion because I’m sick of having feelings about anything.

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brunhiddensmusings · 2 years

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sometimes i am baffled by my life

in one day i get confirmation that the 26k student loan debt from ITT criminal justice courses back in 2009 that shouldnt have been on my name has been removed after two months of trying to explain this as this was the only thing stopping me from getting the loan for the 1974 mobile home i was trying to buy decide i should comparison shop online for furnishings, and apparently one of the best options for a bed is the fucked up grandpa bed from stardew valley.... i am tempted, because its 50 dollars, but im also tempted by the one that looks like its literally 2X4s nailed together for about ten dollars more. all purchases will wait untill i finally have the deed for the gloriously shitty box lined with wood paneling thats older then i am and the first purchase will be a lava lamp in the bisexual color scheme literally ten minutes later i get scammed by someone claiming my steam has been hacked and i feel so, so very stupid, they have literally all my banking information now, also they were using an icon that was the chubby kid from the movie ‘up’ bank is closed and its a 18 hour wait till i can go in to the bank to tell them what happened, i am awake for this all as i have a full time night shift, get off when the bank is not opened yet, have a six hour day shift, and hurriedly get to the bank before its closed. getting my steam account repaired may take i have no idea how long i am formally requested to explain to someone what a yaoi paddle is but am unable to show them a photo find out the song i like on the late night radio block of recent indie music is in fact a they might be giants song from over 12 years ago, a great use of my detective training my brother asks me to help him split wood, the logs in question are what i would call ‘jhon goodman diameter’ 9 year anniversary of the vasectomy of failed anesthesia find out what i had thought was a wild animal invading my sleeping spot was in fact someone accessing the pipe above it while i was gone to shut off water because its the time of the year that pipes freeze get confirmation my infection has recovered enough i do not need part of my face removed find out my ex stole my mace and threw it away at least i still have the sword and shield i found in a dumpster forget to sleep because im too busy watching videos on how to make tiger skin eggs despite 1- i have no kitchen yet 2- i was looking for how to use cocoa powder to make cafe mocha, or is it hot coco mix, does it work with instant coffee.... explain to someone that the idea an exorcism requires an old priest and a young priest originated in an austin powers movie because it was a joke about a continuity error in the exorcist movie where a body double was used have discussion with someone on what my upcoming vtuber avatar should look like as well as what content i would plan to make people vocally angry i have not started a podcast climbs into the double digits what a weekend

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honest-moth-of-silver-grove · 1 year

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I posted 42 times in 2022

That's 4 more posts than 2021!

5 posts created (12%)

37 posts reblogged (88%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@elytrians

@muchymozzarella

@hamartia-grander

@demigoddessqueens

@thotty-bog-body

I tagged 42 of my posts in 2022

#not writing - 32 posts

#not mine - 10 posts

#art tag - 6 posts

#lol - 4 posts

#resident evil - 4 posts

#@hermione-grander - 2 posts

#my love! - 2 posts

#i dont think im capable of normal anymore - 1 post

#me w/ my villians - 1 post

#next tumblr april fools pls and thank u - 1 post

Longest Tag: 82 characters

#like i adore all of the adaptatiosn but am also sad that were loosing the og myths

My Top Posts in 2022:

hey... r u alive??

Am,,, I...?

(Lol, jk- yes I am. And I'm working on stuff I promise.)

((On A Totally Unrelated Note: Do NOT stop masking and get covid again because it can literally steal months of your life.))

0 notes - Posted October 11, 2022

not for nothing but i absolutely do see the trend of newcomer tumblr users only liking posts and not reblogging them

0 notes - Posted May 6, 2022

actually have a wip!!!

woo-hoo!!!

6 notes - Posted March 30, 2022

update. ask box still closed.

i survived the fall semester only to get covid.... ugh. omnicron is no joke.

stay safe out there y’all!

-Mothmom 💚

7 notes - Posted January 2, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Nurse!Reader x Carlos Oliveira & Nikolai Zinoviev Headcanons

A/N: (Everyone’s a touch OOC as I doubt either one would willingly drag a civilian along, albeit for different reasons: Carlos because once you’ve been escorted to safety, you’re no longer his immediate concern; Nikolai because he was never all that interested in saving civilians, to begin with, but let’s say you’re just so darn cute/special that you alter canon circumstances, okay? Okay. Also, all of them survive RE3 in this, so yeah.)

☣ ☢ ☣ ☢

When shit starts hitting the fan, you don't panic immediately. After all, you work in a hospital, what better place to be during a pandemic, right?

Wrong! Oh so wrong.

You see the effects of the T-virus up close and personal, and it’s not pretty. Prior to this point, you thought such viruses only existed in science fiction or cheesy B-grade horror movies. But here it was in your workplace, quickly overcoming all quarantined forces, hospital staff, and security.

So you flee. You leave through a back exit and get the hell out of dodge, or at least, the center of dodge. You soon find, however, that it’s not just the hospital that’s overrun, but the city as well.

Maybe that’s how you meet them…

Carlos:

He swoops in and saves you from a hoard of zombies, looking like an A-list action star as he does it. (It’s the hair- it’s incredible.)

He tells you his platoon is rounding up survivors in the subway, that it’s a temporary shelter until they can get the trains up and running again. That he and his teammates were sent in to get everyone safely out of the city. You’re not sure if you believe this plan, but you follow him eagerly as he leads you to the subway.

On the way, you tell him who you are. When he finds out you’re medical personnel, he’s both impressed and relieved. He tells you his captain has been injured, and they haven’t come across a doctor or nurse that hasn't already been infected. You of course offer to help in any way your can. (Because you’re awesome like that.)

You’re not surprised when he tells you he’s working with Umbrella because you also work with Umbrella as a hospital employee. But to you, they’re a pharmaceutical company, why would they need military personnel? It doesn't sit right with you, but Carlos is an absolute sweetheart. (I mean the man is cracking jokes in the middle of the apocalypse.) So you trust the guy.

Carlos does his best to assure you you’re not a burden or some sort of unwanted weight when you first arrive at the subway car. Mainly, because he can tell by the way you keep offering to help get the trains running, even though you’d be no match for the horde, but also because of Nikolai’s snide comments about Carlos bringing in “yet another one” when the cars still weren’t working. “Hey, don’t worry about it,” he says. “It’s our job to protect you.”

Carlos takes you to his Captain- Captain Mikhail Victor in charge of Umbrella's Delta Platoon. You try and treat the Captain’s injury the best you can, using what little supplies from the first-aid kit that’s available. You apply a generous amount of first aid spray and wrap a makeshift bandage around the cut. You would have attempted sutures if the kit had any but unfortunately for the Captain, it didn’t. The wound isn’t deep but it’s in a compromising place. You know this man won’t make it out of here on foot.

Overall, you feel you’ve done an inadequate job because you know the Captain is still incredibly vulnerable, but both Carlos and Mikhail assure you, you’ve been more than helpful.

But you want to help more! When Carlos admits he and Tyrell won’t be catching the train and will instead stay behind to look for Bard, you offer to come with them, to help them navigate the hospital.

Of course, everyone thinks it’s a horrible idea. One: because Bard is supposedly at the police station, not the hospital, and Two: because you have no weapons training whatsoever. You’re a walking liability. Nikolai teases Carlos about “taking on the burdens of strays”. You flip him off behind his back.

After a ton of back and forth, you insist you go with Carlos and Tyrell, refusing to get on the train. At one point you take a seat on the ground of the platform and cross your arms stubbornly. (You’re not going and they can’t make you!)

Carlos is the first to accept the situation and roll with the punches. “Alright. But I have one rule.” He says. “No dying on me.”

You stand, smile, and shake his hand. “Deal.”

The three of you make it to the police station, where you hang back with Tyrell in the main lobby as Carlos looks around for Bard. Once it’s revealed that Bard is still at the hospital, you offer to escort Carlos there. After giving him your best “I told you so” smirk that is.

On the way you find Jill, clearly having been infected by something, even though you’re not certain what. But none of that matters as you and Carlos bring her to the practically abandoned hospital.

Once Jill is settled, you give Carlos some directions and a rudimentary drawing of where to locate the asshole Bard’s office. “You’ll need a voice key,” you tell him. “You’d have to look around these rooms for one of his cassettes.”

He thanks you before asking you to look after Jill for the time being. You promise to radio him if her condition worsens.

When Carlos comes back with the vaccine, you could practically kiss the man. You don’t, of course, it wouldn't be appropriate. (But the thought does cross your mind very briefly.) Carlos lets you administer the vaccine to Jill, you being the trained nurse and all. With all that's happened, being able to do some actual healing feels like nothing short of a miracle.

You begin to take notes on Jill’s condition, commenting that although it doesn’t seem to be a speedy cure, her fever’s going down and her skin doesn’t look as clammy.

The miraculous feeling doesn't last long, however, as Tyrell comes bursting through the room, clearly out of breath and pretty banged-up. He turns on the TV and to your horror, you find you have only hours to make it out of Racoon City unless you want to be vaporized. (Which, no, thank you! You certainly don’t!)

After catching up, Tyrell being high-key surprised you’re still alive, (which honestly, you’re like ‘same’ lol) you decide to go with Carlos underground, to locate the stockpiled vaccine as a last-ditch effort to save the city. You hope whatever they made, that there’s tons of it.

Before going underground though, Carlos gives you a gun from one of the killed security guards. It only has a few bullets but he feels safer knowing you’re not just going to walk completely weaponless into whatever danger Umbrella has waiting for you.

See the full post

187 notes - Posted April 4, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #bruh this year kicked my ass fr

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